#I don't remember if I have a concept tag but I am not putting this in any main tags kfdkg

[royalarchivist]

Pac: This is my secret base. And this is Pequito!

Fit: Pequito! *Immediately starts cooing over Pequito*

Pac: [Laughs]

Fit: Sorry, sorry.

Pac: No no, that's good! He likes you, you know, he likes you.

[smalltimidbean]

About a month ago someone asked if there would be a clone based on the secrets, and I have - once again - overthought the idea and ended up with too many kgklfd

So have some concepts while I try to finalise them! They will be just one character, but I might recycle unused concepts later

[theboxfort]

Did you watch thafnine's video on Corpse Party cuz it has almost everything about the history of the game, both The Good and The Bad

Yep, watched that! Younger me would be hella disappointed at Corpse Party: Blood Drive but ehhhhhhhhhhh,,, 😬😔😔

[promptsbytaurie]

dialogue prompts: five words

!!please credit/tag me if you use any! I'd love to see what you write!!

"This story has one ending."

"Give it a shot, okay?"

"It's way past your bedtime."

"Is this really worth it?"

"Believe the prophets, they're right."

"You're not real, are you."

"Truth is nothing without lies."

"It was me, wasn't it?"

"The world wants me dead."

"'It'll be fun,' they said."

"What an... interesting first date."

"You're such a drama queen."

"I thought you were alone."

"Wish I was dead now?"

"This cannot be a new concept."

"So you didn't have to."

"Has anyone helped you yet?"

"I'm adjusting to civilian life."

"Take it to the boss."

"You really live like this?"

"I don't want to remember."

"Is it me or you?"

"Am I still a god?"

"We have work to do."

"Is there something you're hiding?"

"Stop stealing all my thunder!"

"It's November, put it away."

"You're so brave, little one."

"I believed in you too!"

"Can you just stop trying?"

"What did she ever do?!"

[dduane]

BTW… re: Smut

... off my comment to this post the other day...

I'm an entertainer. Writing's a form of entertainment. (And not just for the readership: for me, too.) To be aroused by art one's experienced is (almost by definition) to be entertained, I'd say. If someone's jerking off to my erotica, then all I can do is lean back in the typing chair, smile a bit, and think, Good! I got the job done. :)

(...with the tags: #and no I'm not going to let on where the smut is#why would i deny anyone the delights of the search#and of being repeatedly mistaken#while possibly finding smut writers who're better at it than i am#:) ...)

...and then noting (with affectionate amusement) some responses:

Well, troops, better get busy filling in that bingo box. 😄

Also: I have to say (while stressing that I absolutely appreciate the humor behind "shocked, shocked, scandalized...") that the dissonance is, temporally speaking, a bit ill-founded. Because while I may be best known for the Young Wizards works these days... by no means did they come first. This did.

A soft chuckle in the darkness. “Lorn, remember that first time we shared at your place?” “That was a long time ago.” “It seems that way.” “—and my father yelled up the stairs, ‘What are you dooooooooing?’ “—and you yelled back, ‘We’re fuckinnnnnnnnnnng!’” “—and it was quiet for so long—” “—and then he started laughing—” “Yeah.”

Granted, from the here-and-now POV of readers with access to the hot-'n'-spicy shipfic or PWP on AO3, this sort of thing (and the numerous other lights-often-off or dialogue-only sexytiems passages in the traditionally published Middle Kingdoms works) would be seen as pretty small beer: soft, non-edgy stuff. Yet in 1979 apparently there were those who found the sex and sexualities on display in The Door Into Fire arresting enough that the book got me nominated for the Astounding Award (for best new author in the field) two years in a row.

There's no question that the broadly inclusive tone set by the Middle Kingdoms books went on to affect and underlie the YW universe in very basic ways. (There've been some scholarly works written by academics who've picked up on this, so [much to my relief] this perception hasn't been just me imagining it.) But I'll grant you that those who don't know the MK novels wouldn't be in a position to make the connection. (shrug) This is just one of those things that comes of having a lot of fragmented readerships who don't know about each other... a side effect of having done a lot of different things during a career. I can also understand how not knowing about the MK works could leave people who know me only, or primarily, as someone writing for a younger readership, a little bit disoriented (or maybe concerned) when the issue of me writing openly sexual material rears its head. But that wouldn’t be a change of direction. It’d be, to some extent, more a return to form.

Anyway: I consider erotica—and its more casually-dressed (or undressed...) cousin, smut—to be perfectly legit forms of literary expression; ones that can soar to unexpected heights if you're willing to put in the work. The sexy-stuff-writing muscle requires periodic exercise if it's to remain viable and/or useful. So I exercise it. And being a 70-year-old person who sometimes creaks audibly when she walks has done absolutely nothing to decrease my interest in the subject—the brain being, after all, the biggest sex organ, and the one least vulnerable to the depredations of time. If anything, nearly fifty years of experience (and three and a half decades of marriage to @petermorwood) have added... let's just say nuance. 😏

Now this whole concept will doubtless horrify some of the "Eww, You're Too Old To Be Writing This Kind Of Thing, Go Get A (Home) Life" types. To which all I can say is, "...Well, good!" By and large, such folks are not my readers anyway. And as for any of them who are, and can't deal…? They need to understand that (pointing off to one side) those people over there—the various kinda-straight and pansexual and bisexual humans, and the gender-fluid fire elemental, and the otherly-gendered Dragon, and the mostly-gay ones enthusiastically shouting "We're fuckinnnng!" down the stairs—are Nita's and Kit's godparents. Without the members of that extremely mixed marriage and their increasingly extended family, there might be no Young Wizards series... not least because it was the splash made by the first of the Middle Kingdoms books that got the Errantryverse crowd in through a major publisher's door. And the series’s continued (modest but still noticeable) success through the second and third volumes kept the writing of new YW books going for a good long while.

...So. For those who may have had questions: HTH. 😀

(And now back to the unending search for a more graceful synonym for “testicles”.)

[caplanbuckybarnes]

Weekly Writing Challenge! #1

(February 19- March 2)

For a very long time i was debating on deleting this blog. Instead of deleting this blog and losing the friends/followers i have, i have decided ultimately to reserve this blog as a writing challenge prompt blog of sorts. I took a mini vote with a few followers and they were all in favor of this being a final decision.

With that being said! here's the first batch of weekly writing challenges that i wanna do!

I was thinking of hosting these every sunday (Haven't decided on a timeframe yet tbh.) Each writitng challemge will have5-10 prompts to chose. I was thinking of having themes for each week. This challgen isn't themed. but let me know what I should od in the comments?

Rules:

You don’t have to follow me!

ANY CHARACTER ANY FANDOM!

No underage smut (I shouldnt have to tell people this in today's world, but here we are lol)

Tag fics accordingly! 

If you decide to post your fics elsewhere, PLEASE inform me.

I will be putting these challenges (And others that i host) right here on this masterlist)

No due dates!

all of these prompts are up for grabs! they will not be crossed off if they are picked!

I don't need to be informed of what fandom or pairing. Just let me know when your fic is posted!!!

use the tags #caplansweeklywritingchallenge

Each challenge will have 5-10 prompts and they will all be completely randomized. (Some will be taken from previous writing challenges that i hosted prior to this, sue me)

And without further ado, the prompts are below the cut!

“I bought them for someone.”

"Freedom is just a concept, isn't it?"

"Why can't you remember me?" "What did I do?"

“I made a batch of cookies, but I made too many for just one person.”

"You're enough for me."

“when we were together, I had a book of all the pictures we’d taken. remember how we used to take at least one photograph on each date?”

"... What else am I supposed to do?"

"Holding you like this is where i'm happiest."

"I have loved you since we were kids."

“You don’t get to leave and then come back after all this time and expect me to welcome you with open arms.”

[runs-red]

Why the Radqueer community is harmful. 

[This has been more or less a side-vent for me so it's a little un-organised and full of half-thoughts. | Civil discourse is encouraged]

Just to start off, yes, not all radqueers believe the same thing. This is about the community as a whole and what is generally accepted there. I was a radqueer when I was a bit younger. I’m talking about the patterns I recognise and the things I’ve personally seen in the community. 

Since this is a common denominator, I’ll point this out first: the “acceptance and support of everything” is way too high to the point where it becomes harmful. Which doesn’t sound like something that could be possible. I remember being a radqueer and thinking the concept of acceptance being harmful was a crazy concept, but yes, acceptance can be harmful. A lot of the things I'll be pointing out wouldn't be an issue if there were a level of intolerance and a point where people would put their foot down. Acknowledging that paraphiles aren’t something people choose to have and that they can control their actions (pro-para) is completely different from acting like paraphilias are the same as being gay and that the big three can have contact (radpara). 

Radical acceptance of paraphilias and contact. 

Contact stance discourse is seemingly never-ending, radical pro-contacts and ideology pop up consistently enough, and sexual abuse and grooming have been reported from the community consistently. The community's environment is just prone to attracting these kinds of beliefs too, even if there are people in the community who are against them. Consensual abuse and seeking or being in toxic relationships are also somewhat relevant in the community. It doesn't really seem like "just" kink to me, because in a BDSM relationship, terms like "transgroomer" aren't used, and it's not about fuffiling a transtion. 

Normalisation of Self-Harm.

There is no shortage of transharmed terms and transition tips in the tags, as well as vent and fantasy posts. Again, the issue isn’t the feeling. Feeling like you should be hurt is relatively common. The issue is that this is just being encouraged and not dealt with properly. I feel like transharmed terms would be better if the transition tips were about coping with that feeling, trying to get better, and dealing with the root cause rather than “hurt yourself or roleplay being hurt.”.

Acceptance of socially insensitive/offensive content. 

From racial transition tips to transharmful terms to genuine contact discourse, there’s a wide variety of wildly insensitive content in the tags. There's a difference between being socially unconventional and supporting terms like transnazi and telling people to tan their skin to look brown. 

If your thinking it's ironic a pro-fiction person is talking about things like insensitive content - I think theres a huge difference between saying that gross ass kinky fiction and gross ass sex scenes can exist in fiction, and supporting real school shooter edits and encouraging black face. I also am allowed to have limits on what I think is okay and not okay like anyone else.

---

Again, I don't think the issue is in being pro-para and pro-non-normative dysphoria but in the overall toxic environment in the community.

[vampiretendencies]

IDCNTLIKEDARKNESS MILESTONE EVENT ★

request; congratulations on the milestone. i was wondering if you could do a piece on this lyric, xi. "tell me how did i ever find you, babe, tell me now that you're never gonna' run" - heaven by the neighbourhood. just jj feeling lucky that he has his partner but also a little insecure but the partner reassures him that she not going to bail on him like his mom.

pairing; jj maybank x fem!reader

warnings; fluff, a bit sad, mention of depression

authors note; thank you !! & i love this concept, i changed the 'babe' in the lyrics to 'baby' cause i though it suited jj more. said i wouldn't have time to write cause i was busy but i managed to squeeze this out. this is a repost bc when i posted w the original ask it wasn't posting to the tags.

masterlist — jj masterlist — milestone masterlist

JJ wasn't sure if it was seasonal depression, or just a single day full of justifiable sorrow.

Always being difficult to process his emotions.

He's wandered out to his pickup truck going on an hour ago, saying something of 'needing a moment'— extremely out of the ordinary for JJ. The seedlings of his childhood, coming back to haunt him, moments seeming to strum in when he was actually managing his life for once.

There was this inkling of his father blemishing in his mind, 'your mama' always told me you wasn't gonna' be shit.'

And there were thoughts of what his mom would've been like if she was around.

Why didn't she take me with her?

Was I not good enough for her to stay?

Would she be proud of me and where I am now? Did I really fail her?

Do I look like her?

Why couldn't she have stuck around and shown me everything that it requires to be a man?

She left when JJ was so young, and he couldn't remember a thing. Never being able to wrap his head around that fact that his own mother abandoned him, so that meant anyone could.

His chest is tightening vigorously, those same stitches that you sowed back together for him with time, were bursting back open. He couldn't shead a tear, having wasted numerous tears over the span of his life from this deserted

perception.

Up until he met you, he aquired infatuation a chore for most to give to him. With you, it wasn't forced it was seamless.

The four corners of the relationship neatly folded together to create the most irrevocable, maximal and acme-like love story he could've hoped for.

An exact reminder of that is interrupting his thoughts upon his truck door slinging open, revealing a concerned you to pull him from his thoughts. Now, you knew better than to pester, you always waited for JJ to fully tell you what would disturb his usual mindset.

"Don't leave the door open, baby, get in."

He was ready.

His eyes were reddened from sheer discomfort and irritability, having lost himself. Red hat sat backwards atop his head, blonde tresses poking out of the sides. So saddened, but still so alluring. His chin was propped up on his hand, arm resting on the middle console. Welcoming your interjection with dainty gestures, patting his free hand to the empty seat.

"Been in here for a while, J."

He fears making eye contact, because then you'll see his bleeding soul; yet fully knowing so prior.

"Just had to take a break ... for a minute," he mumbled, speaking above a whisper. "Not from you but this shitty life."

He swallowed hard, swearing that the lump in his throat was there to stay, panicking in such a hallow shell. "But then I realized, that if it wasn't for this shitty life ... I wouldn't have you."

You sympathized for him, struggling to rid himself of the shedded skin his parents left behind.

"And I wouldn't have what we've built together."

Unable to resist any longer, he interlocks his elongated fingers with yours, squeezing in reassurance. Bringing the shared knuckles to his untouched mouth, innocently pressing sweet pecks to each bone. You wailed and weeped on the inside, his vulnerability was elegantly put; rich and tasteful for everything he was pondering on the inside.

"Just-just don't do what she did, my sweet girl."

It was always 'pretty girl', the 'sweet' being something new, describing the whole of what he envisioned on the spectrum of you being his for eons.

"Who?"

"My mom... just don't leave me like she did."

The mystery woman resonated with your thoughts, and two and two were finally piecing together. Your poor lover.

"Wouldn't dare do what she did J-"

"Don't know why you stay, but l'm lucky you've been keeping me around. Tell me how did I ever find you, baby, tell me now that you're never gonna' run."

He sequenced his emotions in such a jarring, heavy-load, you'd always be there to take away the pain even if it was just temporary.

"M'gonna be here until we have wrinkles.’

[heartinportuairk]

I went to the final performance of Macbeth last night and I wanted to make some notes for myself so I would remember some things. I only use this account for lurking but I am making this public in case anyone scouring the David Tennant / Macbeth tags is interested in my musings for some reason.

I had been lucky enough to have seen this production three times already before last night - twice in December and once in January - so I have been able to track its journey and pick out what changes night on night and what doesn't. I have found that fascinating. Any changes were minor and pretty much exclusively found in simply the way a line was spoken. For example, the brilliant Noof Oussellam (Macduff)'s "but I must also feel it as a man" was impassioned and angry the first and last times, but the two times inbetween I found it to be more subtle. More sadness, more despair than anger. I guess it comes down to how the actor is feeling it in that point in time and I think it shows a great understanding of the character that they play them in the moment and don't just mimic themselves night after night.

The other great thing about going multiple times is viewing it from different angles. I saw it from all sides, twice from the stalls and twice from the front row of the circle. Honestly, circle was better, especially for Macbeth's death in the closing moments. You do not get the effect of the blood seeping out from under him from the stalls and I tell you now, that image from above sears itself onto your brain.

All of the actors are incredible and have been from the start, but there were a few times last night where I could feel them step up their game. Like they knew it was the last time they were going to say that line (at least for a while) so they were going to give it their all.

One of those times was Macbeth's "tomorrow and tomorrow" soliloquy which had always been brilliant and very moving, but about which something was a little different last night. The quiet, raw emotion in that speech felt as though it had been ramped up (or down??) a notch and was so palpable that it brought a tear to my eye.

Another moment came from Lady Macbeth's sleepwalking scene. Again, always brilliant and always moving but somehow desperately sadder this time around. I wanted to give that murderous, conniving fiend a big hug.

The Porter:

The porter scene is funny but obviously not as much when you know what's coming. Which is why when somebody in the audience yelled out "who's there?" right before he got a chance to say his "ok seriously do none of you understand the concept of a knock-knock joke?" line last night, it was both a shame and a blessing. I felt a bit bad for the guy!

"Alright, you've seen the show before! That was my favourite-... and it's the final show!"

But what followed was a hilarious bit of improvisation and it changed things up a bit, especially as Laura the sound engineer proceeded to make his job even harder with the timing of the sound effects that followed. It meant I was able to enjoy the porter scene as much as I did the first time, but like I said, I did feel a bit bad that his favourite line got taken away from him! (It wasn't me who called out, by the way.)

David bloody Tennant:

I've not seen much Shakespeare live (I want to remedy that, I have become completely obsessed), but I can believe people when they say David Tennant is arguably the greatest Shakespearean actor of his time. You can tell he feels and understands completely the meaning behind the words he is saying. He's not just reciting, not just reeling it off. The pauses, the intonations, the passion, sadness, grief, guilt behind every line just shows his deep understanding of the character and his innermost thoughts. On that stage, he is Macbeth.

What's more is you can tell he absolutely delights in it. Anybody who knows anything about DT knows he loves Shakespeare and it is glaringly evident when he is out on stage. He puts everything he has into it and it is wonderful to witness.

He is truly an amazing actor and a treasure and I have been so delighted to watch his career somehow continue to hit new highs of late. Everything he touches seems to turn to gold. As many have said before me, this really is David Tennant's world and the rest of us are just living in it.

The bows:

The reception this group of actors received at the end of the performance was phenomenal and no more than they deserved. Everybody on their feet, whooping, cheering. A lot of noise coming from such a small audience. The cast were both playful and tearful. To see some of the actors get a bit emotional was very touching and I hope that was, at least in part, due to the love and admiration pouring out of us and on to that stage.

An aside:

So I turn up to the theatre and head straight for the toilets on the first floor. There is one person waiting outside them because it's full inside so I wait too. Within moments, out pops DT from a set of double doors right in front of me. He quickly checks if there's anyone in the other set of toilets (there is) and disappears back through the doors again. It's fleeting, and the only other person in the queue is facing the other way and doesn't see. I keep quiet, obviously. It's just over half an hour until the performance is due to start. He's not in costume yet and the man just wants to go to the bathroom. My point is, I've now watched him live on stage in a very small theatre for approximately 7 and a half hours and at no point in that time have I actually concluded that he is real, except in those brief four or five seconds outside the toilets of the Donmar Warehouse in Covent Garden, when we're just two people who needed a wee.

[meruz]

hi im putting all my asks in one post again. these are from like the past month and a half approx? some digimon thoughts some tmnt thoughts some art musings u know the usual

@waywardistics YAYY thank you so much for ordering! I'm glad it got to you & that you are enjoying it!

this is kind of a missive to everyone who ordered but: I am very nervous about pre-orders whenever I do them... nervous that not very many people will order, nervous that there will be supply chain or production dilemmas and I won't be able to get copies out to people in a timely fashion, nervous about having people's money but having an indeterminate amt of time where i have not yet "held up my part of the bargain" etc etc SO. THANK U GUYS...FOR ORDERING and being patient and im so glad it got to y'all

@seanonthemoon (idk why i cant tag u BUT) interesting... i gotta be honest I don't think abt the crests that much. i agree that they're very much like heres the "girl" crest heres the "nerd boy" crest etc to the point that it becomes almost meaningless. but i think what makes them even more meaningless to me, and is probably the reason they kind of designated girl/boy crests etc is that i think like the digivices they're toys and merchandise more than they are actual narrative tools LOL. I wouldve loved something with cody and mimi! theyre both so deeply empathetic and sensitive.. theres a lot they share but i think because they look so different on the surface it would make it difficult to market that merch...booo capitalism boooo toy marketing its all sexist bullshit at least here in the u.s. idk if japan is that different though.

I'm actually a little frustrated with how often 02 and 02 related media squanders cody in general lol. he feels like a parallel of izzy, joe, and TK(season 1 tk) while also being kind of none of those and suffering through lackluster characterization as a result... and then once ken joins the team it feels a little redundant. there's a couple cody-centric eps of 02 I remember really liking but then i think abt how he's been used since in like post-series content and 02:the beginning where they made him type on the computer even though obviously that's yoleis thing but because he had nothing else to do and aghh... my blood boils. i feel like the youngest but most serious anime achetype even at its bare bones is actually rly interesting idk why they don't play it up. UM. Once again my opinion is that he should be taller LOL and maybe they should play up his kendo martial arts honorable training stuff more idk. tallest + youngest + most serious just seems like a recipe for success for me. well. theres still time. and theres always fanfic.

THIS IS SO NICE TO SAY and not the first time someone has said it but i appreciate it everytime because i really admire the mm art style so much. It's like part of why I got really into the movie because I really recognized my own artistic sensibilities and aspirations in the way they stylized everything.

UM And i feel like since watching the movie and looking at all the concept art and making my own art i do feel like its only become more obvious how much my own art is lacking LOL LIKE when you see something that feels so similar I think the differences only become more stark. those artists are definitely on a different level than me. But it's nice to hear people say it doesn't look so different from their pov. thank u ^^

thank u!!!!!!! i love mundanity and naturalism... there's something so beautiful abt it to me lol... I feel like my anatomy needs work actually but ive been feeling better abt it this year so it's good to hear! thank you!

DLKGDSGDLALSNDF WAS IT TOO FAR..?? firstly, yeah I was thinking late teen/young adult ages for both of them ie 18-19ish, definitely not the age the kids are in the movie lol.

but also they arent DOING anything in that pic it is literally just a confrontation + some innuendo... I think teens should be allowed some less than subtle innuendo.. its like one of the top 3 classically teen pastimes...

this is such a funny ask to get because i feel like i haven't been able to do thin lineart until like. this past year or two maybe LOL. UM having a line-centric art job helped I think. I started on craig of the creek back in 2022 and thats a show where we spend a lot of time inking so I had a job where I was constantly moderating my line weight 40 hours a week every week for over a year. disappointingly, much of improvement is simply horrendous amounts of practice.

Here's a tip though: I think a lot of thin lineart boils down to confidence. I think instinctively we read thick, bold, fast lines as confident but theres actually a lot of obscuring you can do with a thick line. if you're not sure whether the nose on the face or a browline should be a little more left or a little more down you can hide that with a thick line and pretend its a shadow. or hide it with a bunch of quick lines and the eye can kind of approximate where looks best among the mass.. whereas a thin line is rly singular and stark and hides nothing, it needs to be precise. so anytime i know i want thin lineart i spend a LOT of time sketching, making sure i know exactly where i want my lines to go. so im not second guessing by the time im inking...

ok thats kind of a broad tip lol... here's one thats more applicable: IF POSSIBLE, lower your pressure sensitivity on your device. most devices have some way to edit your pressure sensitivity curve. I use a surface pro at home and this is what my pressure curve looks like most of the time.

When I work on a wacom it looks even more like a reverse L shape LOL. I'm naturally a really heavy-handed artist and I use a "light" or "hard" pressure curve to compensate for how hard I'm always pressing on the pen lol. if you're like me and you struggle with going too hard with the ink too fast... this will probably help a lot!

SFHASLDFH I LOVE THIS ASK this is like the type of question a person gets asked when chalk drawing on the sidewalk at recess LOL. but i understand because I've been struggling also for like. months. I think I'm finally starting to nail it down though so here's some of my observations.

[feel free to save this img but **please do not re-post it or share broadly**. my biggest fear in the world is to spend 30 min on some notes and become a widely proliferated art tutorial im not even kidding. i made it low contrast and difficult to read on purpose.]

my other tip is to just look at and study a lot of reference because that's all ive been doing. the tmnt are really cartoony so its difficult to use like actual anatomical reference unless ur going for that look BUT theres been so many adaptions in so many different styles that there's a real treasure trove of stuff to look at for how to simplify, stylize, and dissect these characters while keeping the recognizable essence. so theres lots to pull from.

If you want to expand further, it's also good to have 5) something sci-fi 6)something fantasy 7)something mundane/slice of life. a bedroom is a really good go-to. And of course some bgs can be two or more of these things at once.

I've definitely answered asks abt bg tips before but here's one specifically for if you want to do bg design for a job:

Your portfolio should probably have at least one of each of the following 1) an interior 2) an exterior 3) a cityscape 4) a nature scene. Just to cover kind of the basics of what you'd be asked to draw on any given project.

I actually feel like I don't have that many cityscrapes in my portfolio... this is something I'm gonna try to work on in the coming year LOL. OH ALSO. This is a very basic tip and people will tell you it all the time but its worth repeating: look up portfolio websites of artists who have the job you want. An easy way to do this is to go onto imdb for any cartoon or movie you like and to find the names listed as "bg/background designer" or whatever then just google that name +"art" or "animation" most artists have some public facing internet presence so it's not hard. spend time studying their work and hold those images in your head! it's a good way to get a good idea of what "industry standard" looks like and comparing ur own art to it... I know people sometimes get bummed comparing their art to others but if you can keep your head up lol.. it'll help you figure out what you need to work on!

.

.

.

ok thats all i have to say sorry for typing so much. happy new year everybody who read this far LMAO!!!!!

[yourlocaldisneyvillain]

i would like to be in and foster an online environment in which discussions abt controversial topics can be handled civilly without ppl ganging up and sending an influx of anon hate. i think internet in general is a space where ppl love to be outraged and i want to challenge that. that's partially why i wrote this fic. i am tired of purity culture and of fandom/online hivemind. in a fandom where a lot of ppl clearly enjoy age gap ships, i say, what makes one better and more "morally correct" than another? what makes a sugar mommy au better than a college student x teacher fic? so many fics featuring dark themes are popular in this fandom (don't wanna name any names bc i don't wanna get anyone involved), but THIS is the one ppl are upset about?

i wanna ask a question -- is it possible to write a fic where ppl are NOT morally pure but still somehow manage to live and find happiness? why is it forbidden to explore those themes in fiction? when you look at ppl in real life and how weirdly their lives shape up, and how ppl are flawed and make mistakes and live unconventionally or sometimes immorally or unhealthily, doesn't that interest you? in a sense that you would like to read about it? explore what goes on in the minds of these ppl/characters?

ppl forget exploring a theme in fiction doesn't equate to condoning it in real life. each individual has to use their own best judgement when consuming a piece of fiction. i assume everyone reading my fic is an adult (as i write fics intended for adult audiences) and can form their own opinion.

i would like it if people could use their reading comprehension and critical thinking skills when reading my fiction, without me having to put up exact and specific 1826372929392 word disclaimers, so ppl's fragile feelings wouldn't get hurt. would it really be okay if i wrote in all caps before the story WEDNESDAY IS 22? you could have read the first paragraph and figured that out. i tagged it as teacher-student bc it's playing with the concept, even if they are not a student/teacher in the timeline of the story. i use implied underage sex as a tag bc in the 2nd chapter, and repeatedly throughout the story i reference larissa and morticia's relationship, that has occurred when they were underage. i mention that they engaged in sex. it is only mentioned, and not explicitly described. do you need me to write all of that out under the title in order not to send anon hate and clutch your pearls in disgust? or can you just read the story and decide if it's for you or not?

i implore you to read all of my works as a story, without attaching a moral judgement to characters' actions. if and when you do attach a moral judgement and form an opinion, pls remember those are fictional characters, and i am an author exploring certain themes bc i can and it interests me to do so. i want to write unconventional stories, controversial stories, romantic stories, funny stories, horror stories, i want to explore everything. everybody who reads is invited to look at them as a piece of fiction they can enjoy or not enjoy, and nothing more. i hope to take you on a journey that leaves you with something to remember, good or bad, but impactful.

from now on, i will probably write longer works and venture into darker themes (next thing i'm planning is murder mystery/thriller). there will still be fluffy pieces, but i just want to push myself out of my comfort zone. i would like to associate with fandom ppl who are open-minded and can read a piece of fiction without going ballistic. if you look at things black and white, you likely won't like my fiction -- and that's okay.

however, if for any reason you want to send me hate, you will absolutely be blocked. i am a person, and i do not deserve insults and rudeness in my inbox. it's easy to feel empowered and feel like you're fighting for A Cause (TM) and attach the Bad Guy etiquette to a single person. that can feel like you're solving something. esp when ppl accuse me of promoting actual p3dophilia -- that's a cause everyone can get behind. banish the evil p3do apologist!

i am a victim of child sexual abuse, that went on all throughout my formative years, and into my adult age, simply because i thought that's how it must be. that experience has scarred me beyond belief. i don't want to share the details. it's not smth i'm sharing for pity points, nor do i need anyone's sympathy. however, it is an experience that has shaped who i am, and perhaps for that reason, combined with other things, is why i'm drawn to certain themes in fiction. i don't owe anybody an explanation as to why i choose certain topics, but since there have been idiots in my inbox who have accused me of harming victims of minor sexual abuse, i feel compelled to say something. fuck you for using a group of suffering ppl to support your own flimsy arguments born out of puritanism and inability to cope with heavy themes in fiction.

you are absolutely welcome to CIVILLY discuss your opinions about the fic with me -- off anon, exclusively. but i know nobody will, bc this isn't about the actual contents of my fic, this is about the delicious morally righteous thrill of a witch hunt.

enjoy the fic. i will post next wednesday.

[stellar-skyy]

SUGGESTED READING - ♡

NOTES: this is an ongoing list of some of my favourite works by my mutuals! there were many i wanted to include (because everyone is so talented omg) but i didn't want this list to be too long.

some of these writers have moved, but i have tagged their latest blog. if you wish to not be included here for whatever reason, let me know and i will remove you.

the blood of the covenant. — @romaritimeharbor ⤷ notes: addi's writing style will never fail to amaze me. every word of this had me giggling and kicking my feet, and reading it felt like a warm cup of tea. i adore the way the siblings are written, this is just so fluffy and lovely with a sprinkle of hurt/comfort for flavour. i love you endlessly! — @thexianzhoujade ⤷ notes: absolutely hearbreaking. this broke me. i have never emotionally recovered from this. written absolutely beautifully, in the most shattering way possible. will he change his mind about you? — @june-again ⤷ notes: this hit me right where it hurts, because i could see myself: desperately clinging to someone while quietly wondering when it was going to end. it honestly almost made me cry when i read it, because i remember when i was at a point in my life where i needed to hear those words and reading this felt like it healed something in me. 1989 - a blog event. — @aventurne ⤷ notes: to celebrate 1989 (tv) we were treated to a fic every day for almost a month from the lovely meisha! i was rereading them to pick one or two for this list, but i couldn't make up my mind so putting the event itselfl! my favourites are suburban legends, wildest dreams, and wonderland. the beautiful implications of kaveh’s missing hairbrush. — @june-again ⤷ notes: such a simple concept, but it is so sweet. i absolutely adore the way this is written, it's so comforting. absence. — @romaritimeharbor ⤷ notes: 10/10 kills me every time. the kaveh!dad au has a special place in my heart, but this fic especially. [name]'s grief is so painful to read, but seeing alhaitham comfort them... it's the best kind of hurt/comfort, where nothing really is okay anymore but you have each other. curtain call. — @rainswept ⤷ notes: my favourite lyney fic from THE lyney writer of all time. and this one. this one is my favourite out of your lyney fics. there's something so foreboding about it, every word feels closer to doom: to the curtain call, as it is titled. i'm never gonna have enough words that describe how well you write characters so i am just going to leave it at oh my god this was amazing. dancing with the fontainians. — @nervocat ⤷ notes: ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE. dancing. fontaine characters. i don't need to explain myself, you had me at dancing. this is very cute and fluffy. the art of war. — @ryuryuryuyurboat ⤷ notes: the first fic i read from the lovely miss yukari! i love this so much, cafe aus are a guilty pleasure of mine and this one was so fun. i'm still giggling at the idea of kokomi just blue-screening after getting asked out.

[wavelikewhat]

More Than A Latte

Pairing: Barista!Seungcheol x Reader (any pronouns) Summary: You have a huge crush on the handsome and flirty barista who makes you a perfect latte nearly every day. Unfortunately, it’ll probably never be anything more, right? That’s what you believe… until you see him on a night out with your friends. Wordcount: 1.7k Content notes: Reader goes to a bar and orders drinks, but no direct mention of alcohol, drinking alcohol, or drunkenness. No smut. Total fluff. Genres/themes/appearances: Fluffy and frothy like his lattes would be. Entirely inspired by this clip. Barista!Cheol in that shirt with that hair and those forearms really put a lot of thoughts into my head.

A/N: this is a mini "collab" with @seungkwansphd: please read their version of this concept called bean me up, scotty!! we both had different inspiration based on my totally normal and definitely not over the top reaction to that Barista!Cheol clip ☕️

SC - What will it be today? YN - Medium latte. SC - Perfect… and can I have a name? YN - Y/N. SC - Thanks Y/N. Your drink will be on the other end of the counter over there. 

SC - Hey! I remember you from the other day! What will you have today? YN - Hey, good morning. I'll have a medium latte. SC - Excellent choice… Remind me of your name? YN - Y/N. SC - All right Y/N, it’ll be at the end of the counter. 

SC - Hey Y/N, good morning! Medium latte? YN - You are a quick learner. SC - It helps that you order the same thing every time. Have a good one! 

YN - Hey, good morning. SC - Hey Y/N! Regular? YN - Make it with an extra shot of espresso, please. SC - I can't tell if that's a commentary on last night or this morning. YN - Let's just say both and leave it at that. 

YN - Hey, good morning. I'll have a medium latte. SC - Perfect order for a perfect day. YN - It really is beautiful out… I was thinking of taking the bus but maybe I'll walk. SC - You can't take hot coffee on the bus. Unless you're sneaky? YN - I am not very sneaky… I just drink my coffee a little faster than is probably responsible. Is that against the rules too? SC - I will be here to make your medium latte whenever you need it. Just don't take it on the bus.  YN - I promise.

SC - Hey Y/N, how was your walk yesterday? YN - It was really nice. Did you get a chance to get outside? SC - I did, you inspired me. I took the long way home. YN - Home isn't nearby? SC - I live on the other side of the river. YN - Oh, me too! SC - Really?

SC - Hey Y/N, medium latte?  YN - You are my hero. 

……………………

“Hey, good morning Y/N! I saw you across the street through the window.” Seungcheol picks up the white cup on the counter in front of him and hands it to you. “Here you go,” he says with a casual smile. Your knees threaten to give up on their one job of holding you upright.

You take the latte from him, fingertips gently brushing against his. You couldn’t have imagined the spark you felt when you touched his skin. Your fingers are probably going to tingle for the rest of the day from the memory of his touch. 

You gather your wits and look up at him. “Wow, thank you! Does everyone get this level of service?” You’re flirty, you always are. You can’t turn it off when it comes to him.

“Only you.” The corner of his mouth tilts up. He’s flirting, too.

“Do you say that to everyone?”

“Only you.” He grins wider and runs a hand through his blond hair, all while meeting your gaze.

You glance down at his name tag to break eye contact. “Seungcheol (he/him)” it says, as if you haven’t read it a thousand times before. 

His crisp white shirt is buttoned nearly all the way up to his neck, just one left undone, giving you the tiniest peek at his collarbone. His sleeves are rolled up the same way as always, showing the same few inches of forearm you stare at almost every morning.

He chuckles and draws your attention back to his face.

You still haven’t ever said his name, but he always greets you with yours. It gives you a buzz every time you hear it.

The way he says your name affects you. The way he smiles after he says your name affects you. The way his eyes light up when he sees you walk through the door… That definitely affects you.

……………………

“How did you even find out about this place?” you ask as you step out of the taxi. 

“Someone I work with was talking about it,” your friend Nina replies, adjusting her top. “I figured we might as well go somewhere new.”

“What, you don't like change?” your friend Eunchae teases as they hold the door open in front of you. 

“Haha,” you reply sarcastically, knowing full well that you're the most routine-oriented person any of your friends had ever met, even counting Nina’s dad who delivers mail—which means he goes to the same houses on the same street in the same order every single day. You can’t help it if you like routine! Spontaneity isn’t really your strong suit.

“Well, it looks pretty cool,” you say, scanning the crowd. Everyone seems to be having a good time, which is always a promising sign. It isn’t too loud, but there’s a level of excitement in the air that makes you bob your head slightly to the song spun by the DJ in a far corner of the room. Your friends lead you to the bar and you run your eyes down the length of it, seeking out the bartender with the shortest queue. 

And that's when you see him. 

Seungcheol. He's in a tight black tee (where did those muscles come from?) flashing the smile that had become a crucial part of your morning routine. As he turns his head, his blond hair sparkles in the dim bar lighting. 

Your eyes narrow at the women giggling as he hands them two colorful drinks. Who could they be? Does he know them? Why is he smiling at them?

“What do you want?” Nina asks in front of you, breaking your concentration. Thankfully, she’s caught the attention of a bartender working exactly where the three of you are standing. You make a very large mental note to avoid Seungcheol's section of the bar for the rest of the night. 

As much as you want to see Seungcheol again, because once nearly every day is definitely not enough, you have absolutely no idea what you would say if he recognized you… if he even could recognize you outside the context of the cafe. You’re dressed totally differently from how you dress for work, and your hair is different, and your makeup is different, and hopefully your entire demeanor is different because it isn’t the crack of dawn and you aren’t getting the caffeine you desperately need in order to become a human being. You have many hours of being human behind you today. 

That’s when you remember that you didn't actually see Seungcheol today. You were running late to work and you didn't have a chance to stop for coffee, so you ended up making instant coffee in the break room after you arrived. It wasn’t the same. Seungcheol’s coffee just works better.

Needless to say, you plan to do everything in your power to avoid him tonight, even though every single molecule in your body wants to be as close to him as possible… tonight, tomorrow night, and every night until the end of time. 

Your friend hands you a glass and motions you away from the bar. You’re more than happy to escape the possibility that Seungcheol might notice you (even if that's secretly what you want). You attempt to stop thinking about him for the next half hour while your friends gossip and sip their drinks. You mostly succeed, because your eyes only land on him every few minutes instead of every fifteen seconds. 

“Come help me carry the next round,” Eunchae instructs as they stand up. You casually glance at Seungcheol’s section of the bar as you follow Eunchae. There’s a huge smile on Seungcheol’s face as he pours drinks for two guys who look to be as tall as he is. He looks so painfully good in that shirt. 

When the guys turn around to walk away, they are very obvious about glancing back at him with their wide eyes and secretive grins, clearly discussing the handsome bartender who just made their drinks. As they should, you think. He deserves it. 

You shake your head, trying to get him out of your mind. “Can you see which bartender we should go to?” Eunchae asks, looking at both ends of the bar in confusion. You point to the bartender at the exact opposite end of the bar from Seungcheol. 

“He only has one person in front of him,” you explain, walking as far away from Seungcheol as possible. 

Despite your reluctance to look at a certain bartender in the building, you and your friends have an amazing time. The drinks taste great and the vibes are just right. The three of you were enjoying letting loose after a long week, and you can tell the people around you are enjoying themselves, too. 

After the three of you head out to the dance floor, Nina and Eunchae keep saying they’re looking forward to coming back and bringing your other friends along. You’re excited and horrified by this possibility. It’s always great to find a new place you and your friends all like. The problem is you don’t know if you can even get through this night without making eye contact with Seungcheol and melting on the spot. There is no way you'd be able to hide from him on another night out, or other nights if your group keeps dropping by. 

Sooner or later you’ll end up having an awkward encounter with him and you do not trust yourself to be cool in that situation. Not even a little bit. 

“Let's have one last round?” Nina suggests, and you nod. Eunchae moves toward Nina, saying they’ll help carry water to the table with the drinks if you can snag a table. You look around, enjoying the music and carefully avoiding a certain someone in a black shirt. 

When your friends come back and set all the drinks and water on the table you're at, you let yourself enjoy their company fully, appreciative of the fun night with some of your favorite people. You’re finally able to completely forget the man at the end of the bar. 

Suddenly, Nina and Eunchae both turn their heads toward you. No, not toward you: they’re looking at someone behind you. You turn back to find out what caught their interest.

“Hey Y/N,” Seungcheol says with an easy grin, the same way he always does. You can’t help but smile in return. You kick yourself for developing this specific muscle memory.

He’s looking you in the eye for the first time all night. Despite your best efforts (and you tried really hard!) it turns out he did notice you. And he didn’t just notice you, he recognized you and sought you out and said your name out loud in his way that always sends a chill down your spine.

He introduces himself briefly to Nina and Eunchae, exchanging only names and nods. Then he focuses his attention on you again.

“I’m done with my shift. Ready to go?” he asks expectantly.

Without receiving any instructions from your brain, your mouth responds. “Yes.” 

“Are you sure?” Nina asks, looking right at you. 

“I thought we could share a cab?” Seungcheol adds, still smiling, still looking at you.

“We live in the same neighborhood,” you explain, as if that’s all the explanation necessary for leaving with a hot bartender your friends have never spoken to who also somehow knows your name and where you live. You find yourself backing away from the table. Tonight your mouth and legs have made a lot of decisions without your brain’s direction.

“I’ll text you when I get home!” you promise, waving at your friends before spinning around. 

When you turn to face Seungcheol, he takes your hand and bites his bottom lip for a moment before grinning at you. “Hi Y/N,” he says.

“Hi Seungcheol,” you respond, grinning back at him.

[creekfiend]

Howdy, so Ive got a questions.

I was one of the lucky few mentally ill kids who didn't have a horrific experience with institutionalization, and there's definitely a lot more going on under the hood of my mind than is on any kind of record that i haven't brought to any sort of doctor for fear that i will be denied any sort of recourse in my own life (Autism, CPTSD and suspected BPD). I say this to let you know I'm being genuine in my questioning despite being behind anon.

I saw a post in which it's stated that mental illness as an industry and field of study is meant to pathologize "normal" reactions to capitalism and systemic tragedies, but like. Capitalism didn't make me autistic, or traumatize me, or neglect me into developing a disorder. I agree wholeheartedly that mental illnesses can be developed in response to circumstances outside of someone's control, but i can't in good conscience sit here, remembering a time when i was sat up in bed at 2 am having a psychotic break, convinced that i was still dreaming and that there was something after me as i sob and convulsed in terror and say in good conscience that people who have to experience that sort of terror every day don't need some sort of means to help them maintain some semblance of a life.

I say this because the posts ive been taking issue with are classing the very concept of psychology as a field of study and medicine as an inherent moral evil on the basis of stigma and ableism being prominent in the field. And while i again, wholeheartedly agree that stigma and ableism colors much of psychology, i can't help but see exactly how much good it COULD do should stigma and ableism be removed completely from the equation. Replace biases and preconceived notions with a basis of compassion and understanding, if you will.

Is this a movement that denounces the entire study of mental health and the treatment of it as degrading and immoral by nature? If so, what does the antipsych movement have in mind as a means of helping those in mental distress without a means to examine and classify different types of mental distress? Am i misunderstanding the gist of these concepts? Is there some sort of contingency to deal with those of us with uglier manifestations of mental health to put it lightly? For those whose mental health would absolutely benefit from being placed somewhere safe with other like-minded people for a time, is there any room for such a thing as a treatment, so long as it's voluntary, like an actual hospital treating an illness instead of a prison housing criminals?

I just. Want to understand, because the understanding I'm currently getting is distressing to me, as i initially thought antipsych as a "treat nuerodivergent people like normal actual people and also abolish the use of mental institutions in their current, oppressive form", as opposed to those who seem to be saying (and please, genuinely, correct me if I'm misinterpreting this) to abolish the study of psychology altogether.

if you read the contents of my tag and you still think that this is a relevant question I don't know what to tell you

like

...

I simply don't im sorry

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

Hey all!!

I've been trying to write this post for forever but uhhh yes I suppose it's a lot easier to do a quick primer first but uhh

I'm so so sorry I don't answer asks! And I want to change that soon.

[a LONG post about autism, blog updates, and PDA]

TL;DR: I have Pathological Demand Avoidance, but I'm growing from it and hope to become more social on here in the near future!

If you've seen me asks or messages, I promise I don't hate you!! I love you!! I'm so serious

Soon I plan on making a longer post explaining what I've been preoccupied with, and also changes I want to make to this blog in the near future (all small and good!)

But to put it shortly -

I've been suffering from Pathological Demand Avoidance SO HARD and it's been something I've struggled with for some time.

If you don't know Pathological Demand Avoidance - or more accurately named Pervasive Drive for Autonomy - is a profile of autism:

In short though - because asked to do something, ANYTHING, even indirectly makes my brain stall. I know it sounds ridiculous.

It's not even in a cute anarchist 'I don't have to listen to you!!' type of way. Fam it's. EVERYTHING.

It's not so much the activity that's triggering it. I LOVE talking to people so much, but... like, speaking in conversation is like a demand. Someone calling my name is a demand, doing homework, showing up to places on time, brushing my teeth everyday etc.

It's often why young children with autism may not respond to you talking to them, say 'I can't do x, my legs don't work!!', hide when expected to do things, literally REFUSE to go to school (big me thing), etc.

It's linked to the diagnosis (and misdiagnosis) of 'Oppositional Defiance Disorder'.

That's why I may seem very extroverted (which I am!! ILY!!!) but I don't ever appear to talk to anybody or react to them.

For example - It's more likely for me to add to a tag game if I'm not tagged because when I am, I feel really happy to be thought of but then 'Oh God I have to do a thing. Not right now but soon. The thing I have to do. That eventually must be done. I have committed and I must Do Something. Me doing the thing is approaching. The inevitable thing. That must be done. The inescapable thing'.

ON & ON regardless of what it is. I'm not opposed to doing whatever it is, the demand could be completely self-imposed. I'm just opposed to doing something.

Anything preplanned, asked, or expected of me.

That's why I often abandon fics, or say I'll write an essay and then don't do it. I still remember, but finishing the essay becomes a self imposed demand and then.. I can't do it lol

All in all - this can kinda make notifications really hard for me.

@spidey-bie can tell you, even in discord I'm a little lurking gremlin who is only summoned at inopportune moments and when someone has pissed me off

Usually, my response is ALWAYS flight. I may like an ask or message and enjoy it, even have a response in mind - but instead of answer my immediate reaction to is abort mission and FULLY close the app and find the nearest corner, or try my best to appear offline.

IT'S WEIRD.

I have no idea if others will understand what I'm trying to convey because I know the concept may sound bizarre, and I get that. It really was a concept I only really learned about recently.

But that's why I mean seem very talkative and hyperverbal and bubbly but also like never appear to be social with anyone ever.

PDA is like -

Me: oh wow this person is so sweet. I consider them a friend, I should message them back.

My brain: Yeah.

Me:... message them back.

My brain: fuck you. anyway write an essay literally no one demanded

Me: Why? Can I at least write that fic that I left hanging for eight months

My brain: No someone complimented you on that once and now there's Demand. Write something 100% unrelated.

Me: *starts writing an essay no one asked for and doesn't even finish it because finishing it has become a demand even though I'm the only one who even knows the essay exists in the first place*

Like girl be so fr. Even saying this I feel like it sounds like a lie 😭 I got Hobie brain. Some old 'I'll do it but not because you told me to' headass.

I'm Miguel and my brain wanna 'Nah imma do my own thing' on some Miles shit.

Guess how many drafts I have. Guess. WRONG. TWO HUNDRED.

Nah be forreal is that normal? Y'all got that or nah? Is that common I'm being deadass 😭😭

And girl I'm not even gonna show the number in my inbox cause I'd rather be tarred and feathered than indure that humiliation imma be honest 😐 rather be burned at the stake

But I know that me being so active and like... Not Responding can be very hurtful and I'm so sorry!!

Though I know that didn't make up for it. I know it can make me come off as fake or mean but that's not my intention at all, I promise.

Honestly I just have a brain where everyday feels like opposite day.

But I'm a grown ass person and uh!! I want to change that response.

So please don't stop replying or tagging me in things! I genuinely do love it 💖

This blog is really one of my favorite places in planet Earth and I love this community SO SO MUCH.

Going forward I want to invest more time here and just meta writing in specific.

I'm thinking (girl I'm phrasing this SO CAREFULLY so my brain doesn't think it's a demand like shh I hope the autism doesn't hear me) -

I'd like to maybe designate a day for asks to be answered/queued (as many as I can pump out) because I really love talking with y'all and y'all have SUCH good ideas

I'm hoping to do more Spidersona stuff but I'MA HAVE TO PACE MYSELF OKAY that's not a Demand autism we're just having nice hopeful thoughts NOT A DEMAND

So uhh I don't know how I'll encorporate more Spidersona stuff but yeah... It'll happen.

Other stuff too. Other stuff.

[Notice how I have to be like 'I'm hoping, I'm thinking, I might, I'd like to,'. I'm ALLERGIC to 'I will' 🤢🤢🤢]

I plan on making another life update post just to clear up some things maybe talk more specifics. I'm thinking Tuesdays or Thursdays -

I'll most likely close my ask just to pump out the asks that are still relevant time wise.

I'd also like to take more about PDA in short posts of if anyone is interested. Honestly, I think there are some advantages to PDA.

YES I HEADCANON HOBIE AS HAVING IT.

I DON'T FOLLOW ORDERS NEITHER DOES HE.

Save me Hobie.. Hobie save me (I be using him to internally justify my PDA.. 'like Hobie wouldn't want me to answer this linkdin email' 😭😭)

BUT UHHHH If you read this far and you're still here I LOVE YOU YOU MEAN SO MUCH TO ME HOBIE BE UPON YE

I truly appreciate you, thank you for hearing me out!

Hobie says remember to be a public nuisance and never cooperate with anything and leave the function early and steal

I'm gonna go do something that doesn't matter and that no one asked for that I probably won't finish for no reason :) (/pos)

Bye.

[evelhak]

I felt implicitly tagged by @lilypheria. Here's the template too.

It may seem like I only write KnB these days but I don't consider myself to be done with my SPOP comics yet.

Tagging all my writer friends but I'm going to mention @active-mind-15 because you're kind of new to me. But I really want to hear about all my writer mutuals and followers. By the way if you've written one unfinished fic or tried to start to write your ideas but can't, or haven't written for years, or have any other struggle that makes you feel invalid, you count as a writer.

Going to elaborate under the cut because I felt like it.

My old account was FinFanFun, a Finnish site I used mostly for reading Facebook wall fics about that which should not be named.

AO3 is where I publish my KnB fics though I've considered branching out to see if there's still some fandom corners I haven't reached.

I'm slowly introducing myself to writing smut but the only story I've published has been called mild and soft smut or smut-ish, and I doubt the rest will be much different.

I frequently beta-read for friends, though fanfiction is the minority.

I used to have two beta-readers but they're unable to do it anymore so all my fics rely solely on me for now, which makes me really anxious sometimes. I am pretty desperate for a new beta-reader so if KagaKuro and a million words of "homework" doesn't frighten you, please jump into an adventure with me!

All my fics are self-indulgent in that they're what I want to see play out in the story. They are not personal fantasies, or necessarily what I want to see in real life, but it's what I envision for these characters.

I'm always reading old favourite fics again and I need to branch out actually.

If I'm in need of a short fic to read I will probably pick fluff.

Have written m/m and f/f (and m/? and m/f) but honestly it's weird to put them in the same category when m/m is so overrepresented.

I'm not actually sure if I consider fanfiction as a genre or rather a medium, because all genres exist inside fanfiction. Medium is probably more true but I seem to have checked it anyway because I feel like the point here is whether fanfiction is valid literature and that it is.

I don't know if two fandoms with one being dormant would be considered multifandom so maybe no.

I do anxiously wait for feedback since I'm very community oriented but I'm also very introverted and internally motivated so the lack of it doesn't discourage me. I have patience and I can wait for connection for years and years. Not that lack of connection doesn't affect me, of course it does, but giving up is just a very antithetical concept to my beliefs and life.

I have one on-going long KnB story and one unfinished She-Ra fic that is waiting for a better time. Which is an exception since I tend to finish what I start before moving on.

Editing fanfiction is actually not as bad as editing original fiction because I put much less pressure on myself, partially because you can always edit your fic again.

Always listening to hours long conversations in my head between characters when I'm trying to sleep. They're really bad at shutting up and I'm supposed to remember this stuff in the morning?

I was mildly drunk for ten days straight to write Anything Can Happen. Haven't done that since but it was really fun.

My main KnB storyline gets most of my attention. It's just my thing, I pour everything into it.

I didn't check 'wants to be a professional writer' because after three traditionally published books I consider myself to be that already. I actually went the other way around than seems to be the norm: I was an original fiction writer first and then branched out to fanfiction in my twenties. I can see it greatly affects how I write fic, and it's probably the main reason I feel like a bit of an outsider.