#I had an interesting month and it isn't even the tenth

[dfsgasad]

You know what? I'm not shutting up about this.

CIS ALLIES, this post is for you.

I understand that you guys are great, and I'm so, so glad you're here, but here's a list of some things that should be obvious but some of you seem to miss anyways

Don't defend my pronouns for me

Don't correct people on my pronouns

Don't try to fight people on my name

Especially if I'm there, take your cues from me

If someone made a comment about me and called me a girl/guy/something that doesn't apply and I'm not correcting it? don't speak

Essentially? If your options are misgendering or outing? This is the only moment where misgendering someone is the correct answer

Never out someone else to me, even if I'm part of the community

If you tell me vaguely about a friend of yours that's trans, that's okay, but NEVER introduce someone as "Yes, this is X, the trans friend I told you about"

Never, ever tell me someone's deadname

No, not even if you talk about them before their transition or before they came out to you

Not even for a story about how you found out! Really! Invent a new name if you need to!!

I DON'T CARE IF THEY USED IT, IT'S THEIR NAME, THEY DECIDE WHO LEARNS IT OR IF ANYONE

I'm using trans as an umbrella term here, but it applies to anyone who's trans, nonbinary, genderfluid, or any other identity, please feel free to add to this list or ask me about any of this.

[lecsainz]

Back to December

pairings: lando norris x fem!¡reader / mentions fem!¡reader x george russell

warnings: mentions of cheated and english is not my first language

authors note: I was inspired by Taylor's song 'Back to December'. I'm not used to writing this style, but I decided to give it a try. Well, I hope you like it.

word count: 950

Lando Norris saw her from across the paddock, standing there with George Russell. It had been months since they last spoke, but seeing her again brought back a flood of memories.

He made his way over to her, his heart racing as he tried to think of something to say.

"Hey, Y/N," he said softly.

She turned to look at him, her expression guarded. "Lando," she said coolly.

He hesitated, unsure of what to say next. "How have you been?" he asked finally.

"I've been good," she said, her eyes flickering over to George.

"George," Lando greets him and he couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy as George placed a hand on Y/N's waist, pulling her closer.

Lando felt a pang of jealousy, mixed with regret. He remembered the way he had hurt her when they were together, and now he was seeing her with someone else.

"I'm happy for you," he said, forcing a smile.

Y/N looked at him for a moment, her eyes searching his face. "Are you?" she asked quietly.

Lando shook his head. "No," he admitted. "I'm not. I messed things up with you, and now I see you with someone else..."

He trailed off, feeling a lump form in his throat. Y/N looked at him with a mixture of sadness and understanding.

"I forgave you a long time ago, Lando," she said gently. "But that doesn't mean I forgot. It just means I chose to move on."

Lando nodded, feeling the weight of his mistakes heavy on his shoulders. "I'm sorry," he said again. "For everything."

Y/N smiled slightly, but there was a hint of sadness in her eyes. "I know you are," she said. "But sometimes sorry isn't enough."

They stood there in silence for a few moments, the air thick with unresolved emotions. George looked between them, unsure of what to do.

"I should probably get going," Y/N said finally, breaking the tension. "It was good seeing you, Lando."

"Goodbye, Y/N," Lando said, his heart heavy as he watched her walk away with Russell.

He knew that he had lost her for good, and it was a painful reminder of the mistakes he had made.

Lando tried to focus on his race, he tried to leave behind the pain of seeing his ex-girlfriend with another driver. He knew he needed to concentrate on the race, but he couldn't help the images in his head. He remembered the moments they spent together and how everything seemed perfect. But he ruined it all when he cheated on her.

As he prepared for the race, Lando tried to focus on his team's instructions. He felt a lump in his throat as he looked out at the crowd and imagined Y/N cheering for George, who she was with now. He felt like he was losing everything.

The race began and Lando tried to focus on the task at hand. He fought hard to climb the ranks, but something was off. He made some mistakes, losing time and falling even further behind in the rankings. He knew his team expected more from him.

In the end, Lando finished the race in a humiliating tenth place. He got out of the car and walked back to the pits with his head down. His team tried to cheer him up, but he wasn't interested. All he could think about was Y/N and what could have been if he hadn't cheated on her.

He knew he needed to move on, but he didn't know how. He wondered if he would ever be able to forgive himself for what he did.

Lando was sitting on the couch in his room in the McLaren paddock, staring at his phone with a heavy heart. He took a deep breath and dialed his ex-girlfriend's number, hoping that she would answer.

"Hello?" a hesitant voice answered.

"Hey, it's me," Lando said, trying to keep his voice steady.

There was a long pause on the other end of the line before she spoke again. "What do you want, Lando?"

"I just wanted to say that I'm sorry," Lando said, his voice breaking slightly. "I'm sorry for what happened between us. I wish I could go back in time and change things, but I can't."

There was another long pause before she spoke again. "It's too late for apologies, Lando."

Lando swallowed hard, feeling the sting of her words. "I know, I know. I just wanted to let you know that I still care about you and I'm sorry for everything."

There was silence on the other end of the line before she finally spoke again. "I appreciate the apology, Lando. But I think it's time for us to move on. Goodbye."

Lando sighed and hung up the phone, feeling a sense of sadness wash over him. He couldn't help but think back to the happier times they shared, the times when they were in love and everything was perfect.

He remembered the way she smiled at him, the way her skin felt against his, and the sound of her laughter. He missed her so much, but he knew that he had messed up and it was too late to fix things.

Lando knew that he couldn't go back in time and change things, but he couldn't help but wish that he could. He missed her so much, and he knew that he would always regret losing her.

As he sat there, lost in thought, he couldn't help but wonder if she still cared about him too. But he knew that it was too late, and he would have to live with the consequences of his mistakes.

[echo-echo31]

Gifts | Illinois x Heist

MASTERPOST

A/N: Merry Christmas everyone <3

"Do you really think she liked it?" Markus asks for probably the tenth time today. Illinois sighs but there's no malice or irritation in it.

Instead, he makes his way over to his fiancé, placing a hand on the tense muscles of his back. Markus has his hands on Rosa's cot, as if standing guard over their adopted daughter. He relaxes a little at the contact, but it takes Illy's voice to get him to exhale.

"Hey...darlin'. You gotta stop stressing about makin' this the perfect Christmas,"

The younger man groans as Illinois rubs his neck, closing his eyes and letting go of the wooden frame.

"I know...I know. It's just...I feel like I gotta make this right, y'know? I gotta prove we're the right parents for her,"

There's a pause, then Illy is turning Markus to face him - taking hold of his partner's hands and ducking his head to glimpse those hazelnut eyes.

"Hey now. We are her parents, baby. Plus, she's 8 months old. She wouldn't remember even if you managed to steal a flying reindeer for her,"

At this Markus laughs, a glorious sound to Illy's ears. He looks him in the eyes, a smile dancing on his lips.

"Yeah...yeah, 'suppose you're right," He admits, stretching out his stiff neck.

"Anyway, I haven't had a chance to give you your gift yet, darlin'" Illinois says, noting the glimmer of interest from Markus.

"Oh yeah?" He asks, gaze falling down to his partner's lips so quickly it makes Illy chuckle.

"Eyes up here, pretty boy," He says, and then he's reaching for his back pocket for something it's a miracle didn't catch Markus' attention, seeing as it was creating a noticeable bulge on his ass all day.

The sight of a ring box makes Markus bark a laugh, shaking his head.

"Babe, I already proposed. Remember?"

"This isn't a proposal," Illy replies, opening the box. Inside are two simple, golden bands. One slightly larger than the other.

"Illy..."

Markus' eyes are fixed on the rings, so the older man continues.

"Listen...we kinda got sidetracked by the whole impromptu adoption. Which I wouldn't change for the world. But darlin', I don't wanna wait anymore to be your husband. And...well we don't really need that whole big shabang, do we?" He pauses, glimpsing the cot to the left of them.

"Not when we got all this"

Markus doesn't speak for a few moments, and Illinois has a split-second to panic before suddenly there's hands around the back of his neck and lips capturing his.

Rosa wakes up crying, but she's not the only one.

[maladapt1vedaydreamer]

Shackles Of The Past - Chapter 1

A/N: Saw there was a concerning lack of Az-centric fics that don't revolve around mate discourse, aka bat boys/inner circle centric and wanted to contribute.

for a more detailed summary see here.

chaptet summary: tired parents, their toddler and his angsty friend.

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There is unrest in Prythian.

Skirmishes along courts’ borders are becoming more frequent, inside conflicts rising in most. Feyre would love to think that the Night Court has been spared after everything its people have been through, but she would be lying to herself. Report after report is dropped onto their desks each day, Rhysand is frequently moving between courts for meetings, some more pleasant than others, while Feyre stays behind with Nyx to deal with internal affairs. Cassian and Azriel are almost never at home, much to Nesta’s displeasure, the General paying visits to the camps while the Spymaster is off collecting intel, trying to get at least some idea on what has the people frazzled. The lack of such is taking a toll on every member of the family.

Feyre sighs, taking in the blurring letters of the report about the latest slaughter in one of the outermost towns of the court. That’s what they were, slaughters. This is the tenth one In the past month. Reports would contain depictions of multiple bodies torn apart, limbs strewn all around. Families, strangers, neighbors, there was no pattern. The only thing all the attacks had in common was the bloodbath and the fact that there were no witnesses. None. No one has seen, or heard, anything, the bodies would be found in the morning with the earliest riser. As if that wasn't making their job hard enough, when they went out to investigate in person they would find nothing. No bodies, no blood, no recollection of the people those bodies belonged to. It's as if they never existed, as if the incident had never occurred. Rhys and her pried into the minds of the people who wrote the reports and they would, once again, find nothing. Not even a spell that could be an explanation to all of this. He doesn't mention it, but Feyre knows it's eating Rhys up inside.

Frustrated, Feyre drops the report and pushes away from the desk, rubbing at her eyes after hours of staring at the papers that never seem to end.

”I hope that frustration isn't going to end up with a brother less for me.”

The effect of his voice in her head is instant, the warmth that flows through her down the bond is enough to grant her momentary relief from the oncoming headache.

”I'm not making any promises.”

The lightness that echoes brings a smile to her face and she leans back in the chair with a sigh.

”Should I be placing bets?”

The snort that leaves her would be called unfitting of a High Lady if you asked some of the High Lords, but Feyre was never one for following norms.

”They would have to be home to get on my nerves. You as well”.

The light on the other side dims a little and she almost feels bad for her words. Before she can apologize, a trickle of borderline giddiness shoots through her as Rhys answers back. “I know, love. I will be home soon, tomorrow actually.”

Feyre shoots up in her seat, a grin spreading across her face so big her cheeks start hurting.

”I thought it wasn't supposed to be another week or so?”

She's up now, moving out of the office and towards the nursery where Nyx is playing in his little playpen. After more than a year, she finally feels settled enough to leave him in a room with only the wards as her eyes and ears.

”True, but Az says he has some news. I'm meeting up with him before we head back. Cass should be there by tomorrow night as well.” That peaks her interest and she knows he feels her curiosity.

She enters the nursery and finds their son sitting up in the playpen, a stuffed bat in his hand being flung around, courtesy of aunt Nesta. She thought it was hilarious, Rhys not so much. “Even if the main topic will be work, I'm glad we can all be present for a family dinner. It's been weeks since we've all been in one place.” She stands in the doorway for a moment, taking in their entire future playing peacefully, swaddled in darkness with only the setting sun providing enough light to see his smiling face. Adoration warms her from the inside.

”It will be nice to have us all gathered. I still owe Cassian a beating for last time.” Feyre manages to stifle a laugh, not wanting to interrupt Nyx in his play. ”I'll be taking bets on that.”

Nyx babbles at something in the air and Feyre tilts her head, not seeing anything at first. He's almost a year and a half now, toddling around and falling over, babbling and repeating everything he hears. She has Cassian to thank for the arsenal of cuss words the child has, his pronounciation of shit and fuck is immaculate. He hasn't started speaking in full sentences yet, and Feyre would be worried, but he's happy and healthy. If it takes him a little longer than most, so be it.

”Do you have so little faith in me Feyre, darling?” The drawl in Rhysand's voice has her rolling her eyes in exasperation even as it makes her legs feel weak. Stupid male.

”Now don't go putting words in my mouth.” The amusement shooting down the bond has her regretting her choice of words immediately.

”I can think of something different to put there.”

If he were physically there, she would've whacked him on the head before putting Nyx to bed and taking him up on the offer. Instead, she scoffs and sends the annoyance down the bond. The sound is enough to catch Nyx's attention and her heart melts as she watches his eyes crinkle with a smile and small giggles escape his lips. She lets Rhys in on the scene and the bond lights up with warmth.

“Hello, precious.” Taking light steps towards the playpen, now that she got his attention, she smiles at her son. The babe giggles at her once more, wings fluttering on his back, before he turns to look over his shoulder to continue babbling. Feyre frowns and looks at the wall behind him, yet there is nothing there.

“Who are you talking to?”

Her voice is gentle, always gentle with Nyx, as she opens the small gate and steps into the playpen before kneeling in front of him. Her son turns back to smile at her and once again looks, or rather tries to look behind himself.

”Is everything alright?”

She's so focused on the background that Rhys's voice almost startles her. She checks on all the wards and shields around the house and all of them are intact.

”I think so…" She trails off as a flutter of something whirls around the tip of Nyx's wings. Not wanting to alarm the babe or her mate, Feyre keeps her calm because logically, nothing that shouldn't be here is present. Gently, she reaches out and wraps her hands around his middle, tugging him up so he's standing in front of her. That has him turning around once again as he shrieks and claps happily while trying to bounce in place. He is so precious to her. To them. She is so happy to have him.

”Feyre?”

The undertone of worry has her focusing back on the task at hand, and she goes to turn Nyx away from herself to check his back. Before she can though, that same something flies out from behind his back and twirls around the tips of his wings. Feyre laughs. She laughs in relief and amusement and adoration.

”An update, please?” Her heart is still thumping in her chest as she lets her feelings flow down the bond once again.

”Seems like Nyx here, got himself a friend.” She projects the scene to Rhys once more. This time, it's of the babe still bouncing in his mother's arms as a wisp of shadow twirls almost playfully around him, snaking down his arm and dancing between Feyre’s fingers before going back to Nyx. She feels the amusement and surprise as if it were her own.

”Well, that's something our Spymaster failed to mention.” Nyx lets put another giggle as the wisp flies in circles up and down his arms, and he bats his hands to try and grab at it. Feyre finally pulls him into her lap and relaxes on the floor as she watches him. The wisp disappears behind Nyx at some point and Feyre has a suspicion it's hiding under his wings.

”I wouldn't be surprised if he doesn't know. Those little pests sometimes have a mind of their own.” She calls them pests, but they're anything but. With the amount of times they helped save the Court, their family, Az, they were as much part of the Inner Circle as their master. Rhys hums in reply and Feyre doesn't bother stopping his access. Instead, she lets him watch as she plays with their son, stuffed toys pulled into various scenarios. At one point he looks up at her with those starry eyes alight with wonder and tugs at her hair.

“Mama.” If Feyre melts every time the word leaves his mouth, no one has to know.

“That's right, mama's right here.” The boy smiles before he tilts his head, seemingly confused.

“Dada?” She doesn't know whether the pang of sadness that shoots through her is her own or her mate's. Regardless, she smooths down the unruly mop of hair before responding. “Dada is busy right now, but he will be back tomorrow. As will uncle Cass and uncle Az. Do you miss them, as well?”

Nyx positively shrieks at the news of his father coming tomorrow and Feyre struggles not to grimace at the volume. She hears Rhys's laugh in her head and the thought that their peace could once more be ruined by outside forces is almost enough to make her combust on the spot. Almost. The wisp peaks out from behind Nyx once more and gets the same reaction.

”I should invest in some ear-plugs.” Laughter is the only thing she gets in response. This time, the tiny thing circles Nyx's left wrist and stays there, undisturbed by the boy's constant movement. Feyre finally decides to acknowledge it and pokes Nyx in his side.

“Is that a new friend?” When he finally calms down from his giggles he shakes his head resolutely. “Nuh-uh. Az.” He says it with such indignation that Feyre can't help but laugh.

“I apologize, of course it's Az. Does he keep you company sometimes?” She's mostly curious because while she occasionally sees whispers of their Spymaster's shadows around the house, keeping an eye on things, they never linger.

Nyx opens his mouth to respond but he's cut off by a yawn. He rubs at his eyes and lets out,“Always.” A short ”Huh.” is all she gets from Rhys's end. Curious, indeed.

“Let's get you to bed, precious. It's been a long day.” She scoops him up in her arms and can't help but smile at the obvious frown that appears on his face at the mention of calling it a day. She can't have that now, can she?

“If you go to bed now, you'll have plenty of energy to play with everyone tomorrow.” The stars in his eyes light up once more at that and she takes it as a go ahead. The warmth of the bond is almost unbearable as she tucks Nyx in and kisses his forehead before wishing him goodnight. The boy doesn't mind sleeping on his own, he burrows deeper into the blanket with the promise of tomorrow's fun.

”Go to bed, Feyre. I'll be home soon.” She slips out of the nursery and goes to their bedroom. No sooner than she changes her clothes and her head hits the pillow, she's fast asleep. The only thing on her mind being the male on the other side of the continent.

•°•°•°•°•°•

Gentle claws tap against Azriel's mental shield and he lowers them just enough for his brother to get through.

”I'll be there in a moment. You got everything you need?” Azriel responds with an affirmative and lets the almost scorching sun of the Summer Court beat against his skin as he waits. The heat does wonders for the coiled muscles in his back and wings. He took off the fighting leathers a few minutes back, the heat from them unbearable, leaving him in a black short-sleeve. While most of the tension has been from the evasiveness of the new danger in Prythian, he would be lying If he said some of it isn't apprehension of seeing Rhys. Not that they haven't spoken since the Solstice, they have. While there has been tension and anger between them for some time, they're on the mend. After all, one discussion has nothing on more than 500 years of brotherhood. Things are easier now, almost back to how they were. Azriel simply couldn't forget the look on his brother's face from that night.

The judgment.

The barely held back anger.

The disappointment.

His shadows swarm around his shoulders and up his neck, as if being swallowed into oblivion would protect him from his own mind. The comforting whispers aren't received but he appreciates their presence nevertheless. It's been months and Azriel hasn't disobeyed the order given by his brother, his High Lord. That was his High Lord in that office. He spent some time simmering in anger, at Rhys, at himself. Soon after, he realized he needed to do better, be better. Azriel knows the truth, deep down. Centuries, he has spent ignoring it, keeping it close to his heart and mind in the hopes that if he didn’t admit it to himself, it wouldn’t be true. The implications of it might just fracture him irreparably. Another secret that will die with him. So, chasing something that wasn't meant to be, wasn't going to help him protect his family. They have something to fight for, to live for, he only has them; And he'll be damned if he doesn't protect their peace this time around. Azriel would give pieces of himself away, if it meant keeping them.

The sudden appearance of his brother before him would've startled him if not for the whispers of Brother is here, a second before he is and he reels away from the thoughts to give Rhys his full attention. His brother looks worse for wear, even as he stands there in the middle of a field in elegant attire, the bags under his eyes and unruly hair, both of which were probably the result of worrying about little Nyx and Feyre and a lack of sleep, give him away. It still doesn't dim the shit-eating grin across his face as he approaches him, arms spread.

“Brother dearest.” Azriel scoffs but doesn't shy away when Rhysand pulls him in for a hug. It makes something deep inside tremble, so he pulls away before he can fall into himself. The grin on Rhysand's face doesn't falter even as his eyes scan him for any injuries. Overprotective bastard.

“Hello, brother dearest.” Just to ease his mind a bit. The light of mischief in the starry eyes almost makes him choke because he hasn't seen it in so long.

“I knew all that eye rolling was for show.” It's natural to slip into the back and forth banter, as easy as breathing. “Don't you have scores to settle with Cassian?” The usual monotonous voice is gone, mellowed into a deep timbre that allows those listening to get an actual read on him. His shadows, forever his loyal companions, respond in kind, snaking down his body and up Rhysand’s, greeting his brother’s darkness and he greets them back in his own way before turning back to Azriel.

“If you mean, am I beating his ass tonight? Then the answer is yes. He should be back soon as well, earlier than expected. Something about missing Nesta too much.” Azriel graces him with a raised brow and a very judgmental look. In response, Rhys simply holds up a hand between them.

“Not a word, Az.”

A grin teases at Azriel's lips that he tries and fails to hold back.

“I didn't even open my mouth.”

“You didn't have to, I could sense your judgment from over here.” The annoyance is watered down with a grin overtaking Rhys’s face and Azriel very foolishly thinks he has options. He considers putting the information that he has in the back of his mind under lock and key for at least a few hours so they can have a peaceful get-together. He considers never letting them know and just taking care of it himself. Or just letting somebody else do something for once. But he knows all of that wishful thinking would be irresponsible and detrimental to their future.

“Ready to go home?” Azriel thinks to himself that he needs to get it together, there is no reason a question worded like that should make him feel as if there was a knife twisted in his gut. He’s always ready to go home. Instead of answering verbally he takes a step closer to Rhys and they clasp forearms as Rhys prepares to winnow them home. As the familiar darkness swirls around them and eats up the view of the outside world, Azriel takes one last look at the mirth and happiness on his brother’s face, before the darkness swallows them completely.

There, in pitch-black darkness where they disintegrate into nothing, he wonders how he’s going to keep that smile on Rhysand when what he has to share will shake their calm and safety away once more.

How will he protect them from her when he already failed once, all those years ago? Can he?

The only thing Azriel is certain of, is that he will do anything to keep Amarantha's claws away from his family. Whatever that entails.

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A/N: posting this here as well just to see what are your thoughts (if you do end up liking it, the rest (of what I've written so far) you can read HERE), be mindful of the tags.

Let me know what you think!

[cablestwisted]

The 2023 Fireworks - Ministry of Joy Retrospective

So this is a fun one... Aaand a good two months overdue, my apologies! I've been super caught up with life and it's taken over my ability to create, but I hope to be making more things in the new year.

The 2023 Fireworks were fascinating in many regards and I do hope to make a post hoping to cover some of the theories surrounding its lore, as while it wasn't as lore heavy as other years the implications and reinforcement of existing theories and lore points has me really intrigued. More and more I've been focusing on the lore of the entire park and I really should write more about it but for now this is just about the X-Sector segment of the 2023 fireworks!

Some Backstory

The Ministry of Joy truly had their claws in the 2023 season, because the 2023 fireworks had some truly fascinating lore tidbits about them that were a continuation from the Smiler Takeover event earlier in the season. The shadowy organisation, formerly lurking in the wings, has let themselves be a little more at the forefront in The Smiler's tenth year of operation.

I do adore the new lore additions despite being quiet on them. Far from being too gaudy as I initially feared, it really showed the sinister side of the Ministry while still keeping it quite lighthearted. But my opinion isn't what we're here for!

Wait, was that not The Smiler?

"Welcome advocates to the laughter laboratory! It's time to receive your daily dose of Ministry of Joy approved happiness. A whizzing, spinning, topsy turvy, rib-tickling test drive of your funny bone to make your senses soar!"

The 2023 Fireworks' X-Sector segment was run by the Ministry of Joy, rather than The Smiler! It's something we've seen before to an extent - with the 2022 Festival of Thrills Fireworks' Smiler segment being presented by the Ministry despite using The Smiler's music taste, but this year the music was hugely associated with the different facets of the MoJ.

It seems we're in a bit of a Thrills arc at the moment. Festival of Thrills has been going on for the past 2 years as a continuation of the Powers of the Towers arc that's currently ongoing, and over the course of the events we've seen a lot of new lore implementations and confirmations of fanon. It's certainly an interesting direction and I love the new emphasis on the groups of the park. If we're doing group things, Towers.. Can we bring Galactica as a whole and specifically the Galactanauts back? Rita's racing team maybe?

It's all Festival of Thrills, All the Way Down

The three segments of the X-Sector section of the Fireworks for 2023 was likely based on the three shows of Festival of Thrills.

Celebration of Happiness

The Fear Lab

and Meet The Ministry!

Overall the songs of the sections fit this theory very well. From celebratory and maybe a bit cheesy, straight into thrilling and dark, and finally to mysterious and a bit wacky. It encompasses the themes and motifs of the Ministry of Joy coherently, but also touches on the three shows specifically very nicely!

But it's not just that, there is.. Even more to this rabbit hole of a segment and I won't be able to commentate on all of it today so I'll leave it at just a few more points. This is a far cry from where we were even just four years ago, sitting on lore that hadn't been explored for far too long, and now we're even deeper into the veritable warren of untouched lore potential.

So.. About That Narrator.

This is a bit of a weird one and I'll admit that immediately. He speaks.. Strangely. It's as though he's upturning the ends of every word, creating an almost "uncanny valley" way of speaking, that speaks [no pun intended] to the nature of the Ministry of Joy. It's compelling, a jarring contrast to the narrator of the Katanga Canyon segment that came before it.

It sounds like this person is the voice of a Ministry of Joy announcement, maybe a start of day announcement, or something done intermittently within the facility to remind Advocates to Smile. Always. Certainly it's not the first evidence we'd have of this, looking back at Festival of Thrills.

It's nice to have some more information about life within the Ministry of Joy's main facility. I talked more about it in a post about Festival of Thrills in general, but I do need to talk even more about it because the entire event is again just.. Such a rabbit hole and I'm honoured to have been able to go so many times. Sidenote, I apologise for linking so many of my videos, but I did a lot of lore documentation work during the event that I'm super proud of and it's all on my youtube channel and some of it is very compelling, like the whole spider thing. I will write about that soon I promise.

All Good Things Must Come To An End..

This likely won't be the last post about the 2023 Fireworks nor indeed about the Ministry of Joy lore from the past year or so. There's a lot to cover, and while I've been covering a lot of it in my videos I definitely need to put more stock into writing down what I'm thinking and amending previous theories with current knowledge. Maintaining the Masterpost is a lot of work and it takes me many many hours every time I alter anything within it or even just add a new post. That said.. Happy holidays. I hope you have a good one, and I wish you all the best possible time.

Also.. There might be a meme video before the end of the year. Or several. You've been warned.

[llliiinnnaaa]

Reprisal | Chapter Nine | Part One

coriolanus snow x gaul oc

Summary: Ten years after the Tenth Hunger Games, Coriolanus Snow is under Dr. Volumnia Gaul’s wing as a Gamemaker alongside her niece. Unbeknownst to either of them, they’re both being prepared for a much greater task.

Warning: This story will contain explicit violence against adults and children alike (I mean, it’s Dr. Gaul AND Snow) as well as explicit language, and sexual situations.

***This fic is in no way, shape, or form, me endorsing or co-signing the horrific shit Snow does, nor am I trying to romanticize it. Also, apathy and will be the main driving force of any remnants of a relationship between my OC and Snow’s character. So if you’re interested in something very romantic and fluffy…it’s not gonna be this.

Thank you for reading, I hope you like it!

Blue eyes deliberately meet brown in the slew of the crowd, everyone sitting around the finely clothed table.

“I’ll be back in just a moment.” Tawny says to her husband, not even bothering sitting down beside him before she’s darting toward the back of the restaurant, the blonde Snow on her heels.

Tawny’s fingers hurriedly pluck the emerald cut diamond from her ring finger, the dim lighting of the women’s powder room lending enough privacy in the corner that her exchange with Tigris isn’t noticed by either of the two strangers talking to one another across the room.

Her own wedding ring is replaced, Tigris tucking Livia’s into her small clutch. 

“Thank you.” Tawny can’t say it enough, embarrassed to even have to do this, but Tigris is kind, and very good at minding her own business – keeping a neutral stance as best as she can as she softly smiles and nods, whispering, “Just please be more careful.” 

She despises the thought of Tawny and her cousin being caught up in a scandal, the citizens of the Capitol oh so good at sinking their teeth into garbage and chattering on about it to no end.

“We are.” Tawny assures her in the same tone, though the words in itself is a contradiction as the two women step back into the lavish dining room of the restaurant, Dyess drunkenly outstretching his arms, piping, “There she is!” 

Smoke curls from Strabo Plinth's cigar, Ma and Minerva in their continued conversation from the drive over, giving Tawny’s father the opportunity to finally chat Coriolanus up. 

The string of tiny diamonds that cascade from Tawny’s earlobes catch the light, she and Tigris both in deep red colors, holding Coriolanus’ attention as she sits down next to her husband, who presses a kiss to her cheek, hugging at her shoulder.

He’d started drinking two hours before they’d even left.

“ . . . All of our boys ended up in four different districts,” Tiberius continues his conversation with Snow, the two having been speaking about the military, Snow’s father, Tiberius’ time, and his sons. “Cyrus, Cicero, and Consus were the eldests – triplets. Cyrus was in Six, Cicero was in Nine, Consus had gone to Eight. And then Magnus, the baby brother, was in Three.” He explains. “Me and your father were shipped off to Twelve – worst one there is in my opinion. If I’d heard correctly, that’s where you went, isn't it?”

“Yes, sir, I did some of basic in Twelve.” Snow informs him, sharing the sentiment for the scummy, impoverished district completely. “For a few months, at least. Dr. Gaul fished me out almost as soon as I got in.” 

“You served?” Minerva questions, furrowing her brows as she eyes him where he sits next to her husband. 

“Peacekeeper. Never saw any real combat, however. Just bar fights.” He replies, his words sending a chuckle through the table. 

“Is there a uniform somewhere . . . ?” Minerva asks, next, slightly suggestively.

His eyes flicker to Tawny, who's trying not to stare at him, unable to scold her mother for the question, because she herself is also thinking it.

“ . . . And if so, might I see you in it?” Boldly suggestively.

“Mother!” Tawny tries to scold her, but she can't do it too badly because she laughs , having drank more than usual herself before leaving, as well.

“What?” Minerva asks, innocently. “He wouldn’t have to keep it on for long.” 

Tiberius rubs his forehead, finding some humor in his wife’s blatant request, but doesn’t want to entertain it, while Strabo and Ma laugh as Tawny reaches across the table and plucks her mother’s drink from in front of her, half-jokingly stating, “You’ve had too much of this!” only for her mother to swat her hand and take it back.

Coriolanus studies the interaction, having not seen Tawny act this way before – not around her own family. 

Granted, he had only met them within the past couple weeks, and she had been too stressed and high-strung the first time.

But now she’s relaxed much more, beaming with joy that her case had been successful and chosen for the Games, on a high she hadn’t felt in quite some time. 

His genius idea to get her to redo Livia’s case had worked.

Truth be told, he could watch her bathe in his success – their success –  all night if it wouldn’t be too obvious, the sight of her doing so building his ego bit by bit. 

“I’m going to have to call them to collect you.” Dyess adds it toward his mother-in-law, despite still trying not to show amusement by her brazenness.  

“Oh, like no other woman would have thought of it!” Minerva pipes.

Tigris quietly drinks on her water.

“As flattered as I am, Mrs. Gaul, I am a married man.” Snow says back to her, chuckling, charming as ever as he plays along with Minerva’s flirtations as respectfully as he can in regards to Mr. Gaul. “I’m not sure Livia would appreciate me modeling my uniform or removing it for anyone else.” 

Dyess finishes his own drink.

“Where is your wife , Mr. Snow?” He asks, curiously. 

“She’s visiting her mother, taking advantage of the time off she’s gotten since she won’t be participating in the Games.” He replies, casually. 

“That’s awfully convenient.” Dyess states, Tawny glancing at him. 

He had practically all but confirmed his suspicion upon seeing Livia’s ring on Tawny’s finger. 

“ It was a mishap, Dyess. Livia and I shared the lab and accidentally got one another’s rings .” She had told a bold-faced lie whilst the breath-taking, toe-curling, mind-numbing events of the night had rolled through her mind. 

“I think all of you need a vacation. I can’t imagine the stress.” Ma says, next. “How you all cope with it is beyond me.” It’s meant as a compliment, admiration and pride dripping from each word from Mrs. Plinth’s mouth, but it causes a bitterness to arise in Dyess’ throat while he studies Snow, catching the fast flicker of his eyes to Tawny who shifts in her seat, rubbing her thighs together a moment to try to readjust and discard the filth running through her tipsy mind while Coriolanus imagines her bent over the table, forcing her to stare her husband in the eye while he takes her, coping with his stress the best way he knows how.

Tawny knows he’s thinking no good just by the way his chest rises under his crisp, white dress shirt, the breath evading the both of them the longer they stare. 

“Which district do you think will win this year, Mr. Snow?” Minerva asks, interrupting their eye-fucking, unbeknownst to her. 

“I say kill them all.” Dyess hisses, rolling his jaw. 

“I won’t make any money if all of them die, Dyess.” She explains, a long swig of champagne leaving the crystal flute. 

“District One or Two are usually the strongest.” Coriolanus reminds her, and she nods as if making up her mind that her money will certainly be on  them.

“You shouldn’t place a bet based on who is from what district.” Tawny shakes her head.

Snow takes it as a challenge, blue eyes burning into her as he asks, “And why is that?” 

“It’s based on the skill one possesses. Not the District they come from.” She shrugs. “We wouldn’t have any winners from any of the other districts if that were the case.” 

“I never said that we don’t have any victors from other districts, Dr. Crane. She asked me my opinion, and I told her that typically district One or Two is where past victors have come from.” He evenly retorts. “It’s a fact you can go back and see the statistics for yourself if you’re uneducated on it.” 

“ Uneducated ?” She’s amused by him, finding their banter amusing, enjoying watching him take everything so serious, getting under his skin. “I’m six years more educated on them than you are.” She adds it, raising her brows. 

“Age doesn’t have anything to do with it.” He shakes his head, having a sip of his own drink. “There are plenty of things some people at twenty-eight know far better than people at thirty-four.” It’s added innocently, but she knows exactly what he’s referring to, knowing he takes great pride in doing things to her that her own husband can’t. 

It makes her ache . 

“No offense, friend .” He looks to Dyess, next, her husband rolling his jaw with an amused smirk. 

“None taken, Mr. Snow.” Dyess replies. “You’ll be old one day, too.” It’s added, the table chuckling at the sarcastic notion that thirty-four is old – but in the Capitol, in their profession, it is considered just that. 

“Just go ahead and retire while you’re all ahead.” Minerva shrugs. “Tawny would finally have the room to have more flexibility with her schedule and have us some more grandchildren.” She nudges Tiberius with her elbow.

“She’s already plenty flexible – that’s not the problem.” Dyess comments it smugly, Tawny’s face burning as she hits at his arm, Strabo nearly choking on his whiskey while her father pretends to not have heard it whilst her mother replies, “Okay, now, Dyess, I’m going to have to call them to come collect you ,” while Dyess laughs.

Coriolanus takes another swallow of his posca, forcing a sneer to hide behind his lips as Tawny looks to her father, “Dad, do you have my cigarettes?” 

“Mr. Snow, what about you and your wife? Any babies in the near future?” Minerva asks, next as Tiberius fishes into the pocket of his suit jacket, plucking the cigarette compact from it and handing it to her. 

It’s now Tawny who has to hide a sneer at the thought, even more repulsed by the fact she’s jealous of Livia. 

As if she is entitled to more of him than his own wife is.

Snow’s tempted to intercept the exchange of the cigarette compact and chain smoke the whole thing to ease his ill-tempered nerves whilst he replies, “Not quite yet, Mrs. Gaul. She and I both have a few more professional accomplishments we wish to achieve before bringing children into the matter.”

The posca is helping so very little to relax him, and he’s weary of getting a stronger drink, not wanting to dumb his mind and actions. 

Dyess acts as if he doesn’t take notice of his wife fishing two cigarettes out, holding them both between her fingers, extending them to Strabo and sweetly asking, “Mr. Plinth, can you lend me a light?”

“Of course, Dr. Crane.” He lights it, tucking the silver lighter back into his pocket.

“Thank you,” She states, taking in a deep, simultaneous breath from the two cigarettes before releasing it, smattering the air between her and her husband with smoke. 

“Darling, must you do so?” Dyess asks her, taking one from her fingers, situating it between his lips before grabbing the other and tossing it into the glass of iced water. 

Snow curls his lip at the sight of the barely-used lipstick stained cigarette floating in the brand new glass of water.

Classless . 

Wasteful . 

Entirely Dyess Crane.  

She raises a brow and goes to reach for another cigarette out of spite, only for her husband to grasp at her side, causing her to jump and let out a giggle that she tries to keep quiet. 

It’s infuriating seeing Dyess’ hand disappear from the table as he touches her waist, innocently or not, and when he goes to do it again, amused with her laughter, Snow stands up, silencing the table as they look at him. 

Dyess stops, Tawny takes in shaky breaths, and Tigris prepares herself to tug her cousin from his mistress's husband. 

“Excuse me for a moment.” Coriolanus politely tells them, pushing his seat back in to head to the restroom. 

When he’s out of sight, his fist is curling and uncurling, irritated – no, infuriated – at Dyess’ exchange with Tawny. 

She was his, was she not? Yet she paraded herself to Dyess as if she weren’t crying out Snow’s name less than two days ago.

The more rational side of his psyche begin to soothe him, reminding him that this is what he wants. 

He wants someone who will be good at hiding what they’re doing behind closed doors, and Tawny does just that when she kisses Dyess’ cheek and dotes on him, only to crawl on her knees and beg at Coriolanus’ feet when they’ve time together. 

His mind shifts back to Livia. 

He hates to admit it, but he does miss her. 

He misses her snarky remarks under her breath when they go out together about who's wearing what, what someone’s makeup looks like, whose still carrying the weight of their pregnancy two years after giving birth. 

Her shallow, meaningless rambles did entertain him, especially on nights such as this when alcohol was his friend and he needed a break from stressful topics such as the Games, his time as a Peacekeeper, and when he’s going to have children.

It’s when he gets to the restroom, takes a breath and examines his own bitter gaze in the mirror that he forces himself to calm down.

The room stays empty, quiet, the only sound is that of his heart hounding in his own ears at his spiked blood pressure.

The celebratory dinner was a punishment, he had decided, surrounded and provoked by nuisances of all degrees, from the drunk Minerva Gaul, to Dyess Crane’s smug smile, even Strabo had been grating his nerves earlier in the night by suggesting he go visit Livia instead of tagging along with them to dinner.

He missed his wife. 

But he didn’t want his wife, not at the moment, not tonight. 

No, what he wants is seated across from his spot at the table, and had been continuously staring at him with those brown “fuck me” eyes that have had his heel digging into the floor and his cock twitching in his pants.

He huffs out a deep breath, beginning to grasp a hold of himself, reeling his reckless thoughts back in.

The door is opening after a few minutes, Coriolanus immediately washing his hands as if pretending he had actually been relieving himself. 

He continues his facade, even as Dyess leans against the wall behind him, staring at him in the mirror. 

“I appreciate you helping my wife finally have a successful case after months of failure.” He pipes. 

The water cuts off, Snow grasping at a thick and gold printed paper cloth, drying his hands. 

“I assigned a case to her, she’s earned her credit, where her credit is due.” He replies as cordially as he can.

“So . . . uncharacteristically generous of you.” Dyess mutters, drunk eyes narrowing at Snow, cobalt setting a flame to ice.

“Regardless of what you may hear of me, Dr. Crane, I’m not a cruel man. I can be gracious, patient . . . and generous .” Snow retorts calmly, the last word pulling his own eyes to narrow for a split second, trying to pin-point Dyess’ game and beat him at it. 

“Oh, I’ve no doubt.” Dyess replies, nodding his head. “Just as I’m sure she returns that generosity .” 

The suggestive tone shifts the air around them, the enemies forced to play nice are now merely enemies, any shred of hospitality is disregarded.

“I’ve never found myself questioning exactly how appreciative she is for my assistance – or anyone else’s for that matter.” He’s nearly smug – nearly –  as he tells the truth. “Dr. Crane is a very gracious woman. Fortunately for you.” 

“Lucky me.” Dyess grits out nearly, eyes following Snow as he steps to the door. “You know . . .” He starts once more, stopping Snow in his tracks, the lingering smell of whiskey and cigarettes, the way his words hang in the air, the roll of his jaw and grind of his teeth let’s Coriolanus know exactly why he’d followed him before he ever continues with, “ . . . I never would have thought, all those years ago, that the scrawny kid singing the anthem at my baby sister’s funeral would be screwing my wife just ten years later.” 

[snwusberry]

pairing: multiple x named reader (separate)

genre:

warning(s): language

EPISODE 3

welcome back to berry tv. this is episode 3 of EX where we interview one person and three of their exes. in this episode, we spoke to kadia and her three exes, beomgyu, heeseung and theo, let's meet them.

crew member: would you like to introduce yourself ?

kadia: hi i'm kadia and i'm on tv.

ex 1: hi my name is beomgyu.

ex 2: lee heeseung.

ex 3: i'm theo, or taeyang. whichever you're comfortable with.

crew member: do you know why you're here?

beomgyu: i don't know hey,the email was super vague.

heeseung: i was summoned and i came... this isn't some sketchy shit right?

theo: uhhh.

———

crew member: we actually have your exes here as well.

[kadia's mouth hangs open and she looks at the camera.]

kadia: you wouldn't.

———

crew member: you and two other people have one thing in common.

beomgyu: [sighs]

heeseung: who are they?

theo: huh?

crew member: does the name kadia ring any bells?

beomgyu: you guys are evil.

heeseung: kadia my dear.

theo: of course it does.

kadia: not gonna lie, i'm kinda ready for this to end.

Q: HOW DID YOU MEET KADIA AND WHEN WAS IT?

beomgyu: i met her in ninth grade when i was new to the school and she became one of my first friends.

kadia: i had the biggest, most obvious crush on him pretty much from the get go. when i say everybody knew, i mean eeeeevvveerryyy person knew. even the teachers.

heeseung: freshman college party. it was like this welcoming party sorta thing and i found her throwing up in a bush and decided to help her.

kadia: ... i downed straight gin like it was water after eating a single bag of jellybeans before the party. [she pauses, blinking at the camera] that was not one of my proudest moments, i'm not gonna lie.

theo: we met at this food truck we both frequent and hit it off.

kadia: i was enamored by this gorgeous man with the rainbow hair and i just had to get to know him.

Q: HOW LONG WERE YOU TOGETHER?

beomgyu: tenth grade to twelfth so like... two years?

heeseung: i think 5 months.

theo: round about 7 months.

Q: WHAT MADE YOU FALL FOR HER?

beomgyu: just how unapologetically real she is. she didn't let anything embarrass her, you know? like the whole school witness her publicly pining for me while i was awkward about my crush on her.

heeseung: she could think for herself... except when she's drunk.

theo: no one can tell her shit. she always knows when to defend herself and when to let people think what they want. that was so sexy of her, you know.

Q: WHAT MADE YOU BREAK UP?

beomgyu: we were going to two completely different universities and decided to end it.

kadia: i'm still mad to this day about it honestly. like get this, right? if we were to end up going to the same university, we possibly could've still been together.

heeseung: we didn't like each other in the way we thought.

theo: we were both too busy to make time for each other.

crew member: no bad blood?

theo: not on my side, no. what is she telling you? [he asks inching closer to the camera.]

crew member: who do you think will do best kadia?

kadia: theo. he's the last person i was in a relationship with, but i'm keeping my expectations low.

crew member: and who would you say was the least attentive.

[kadia's mouth falls open at the question, turning in her car to face away from the camera.]

kadia: you're dead wrong for asking that.

crew member: okay but answer the question...

kadia: heeseung.

crew member: interesting

kadia: oh lord

———

crew member: how are you heeseung?

heeseung: oh no...

———

beomgyu: obviously i'd know her best, we did date for two years.

crew members: back in 2020...

beomgyu: ask the damn questions.

[the other crew members laugh at his reaction before the camera cuts]

Q: WHAT IS KADIA'S TYPE?

beomgyu: you're looking at him.

heeseung: someone who understands her.

theo: men.

crew member: explain?

theo: end of discussion.

———

kadia: someone who gets me like i get me. you get?

crew member: not at all.

kadia: next question.

Q: KADIA'S RED FLAGS?

beomgyu: she has no friends. poor thing.

crew member: i'm telling.

beomgyu: you wouldn't...

———

heeseung: she has zero time management skills. it was so bad that for you to have her be on time, you have to give her an earlier time.

theo: i think she's waayyy to nonchalant about the fact that people don't really take her seriously. i think she deserves more respect than that and she just takes it.

———

kadia: man, i'm not sure... everyone gets a point.

crew member: beomgyu said your red flag is that you got no friends.

kadia: deduct his.

[the crew members laugh behind the camera at her straight face as she spoke.]

Q: WHAT IS OR WAS KADIA'S FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOU?

beomgyu: my voice... it wasn't always this sexy though but when we started going out was when it got deeper you see.

kadia: he was so gentle with me. like, everything about him screamed comfort you know? his aura was comforting and i'd often ask him to read to me just so i could fall asleep to his voice... you ever miss someone so bad? [she busts into a laugh, not hysterically, but her body still got out of frame.]

———

heeseung: everything about me. i swear she was obsessed with me.

crew member: is that what you believe?

[heeseung laughs at the comment, unable to respond to that.]

kadia: his confidence was was so hot. like usually when a man is that confident i'm like, 'absolutely not' just i swear it made him look. so good. he just knows he's fine. that and he used to sing me lullabies.

———

theo: whenever i sang to her. she always asked me to.

kadia: his voice is majestic. everyone needs to hear it, i kid you not.

crew member: i'm noticing a pattern.

kadia: you're literally just making things up right now and i don't appreciated that.

Q: WHAT IS HER MBTI?

beomgyu: doesn't that shit change? y'all screwing me over here.

heeseung: she's an extrovert right?

crew member: there's no hope.

[everyone — including heeseung — laughs at the comment.]

theo: est..... p?

———

crew member: heeseung??

heeseung: e something...

crew member: [laughs] what?

———

kadia: my mbti is estp

Q: WHAT DID KADIA HAVE AS A PET AND WHAT WAS HIS NAME?

beomgyu: easy. she had a ferret named ferret.

heeseung: a rat... no not a rat it was a ferret, right?

theo: ferret that she named ferret. she occasionally brought it up and how much6she adored him.

———

crew member: you named your ferret, ferret?

kadia: i'm already pretty and smart, i can't be creative too, it'll be unfair to everyone else.

———

crew member: you wanna know who knows you best?

kadia: let's hear it.

crew member: it's tied between heeseung and theo.

kadia: heeseung?

kadia: fun

Q: WHAT WAS YOUR FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH EACH OTHER?

beomgyu: i always felt content with her, you know. we used to have random, unplanned dates every so often, even though we were broke most of the time. it was fun.

kadia: our conversations were always the best. like, talking to him was always so easy because of how gentle he is when he talks.

crew member: and his voice.

kadia: and his voice.

heeseung: she helped me get out of my comfort zone so everything was always new and exciting.

kadia: with heeseung... he was always willing to try something new and so was i so we just went for it, you know.

theo: how she used to send these random shirt videos and voice notes on my phone. sometimes a picture or two. o found that so endearing.

kadia: my favorite thing about my relationship with theo is that he kept me grounded and any time i needed a pick me up, he was there.

Q: WOULD YOU EVER WANNA GET BACK TOGETHER OR RECONNECT WITH EACH OTHER?

beomgyu: definitely. i haven't seen her in years and we lost contact almost instantly so definitely.

kadia: 100% yes. a part of me still wants to get back together with him because, you know, the nature of which we ended things, the feelings were obviously still there.

heeseung: we still talk every now and then but i don't think we'd ever get back together.

kadia: we make better friends.

theo: we broke up and stayed as friends. we actually recently had a project together so it's all good. getting back together, however? is a no.

kadia: we're pretty much bestie now so there's that.

crew member: and that's a wrap.

AFTER THE INTERVIEW:

kadia: that was a lot [kadia gets off the chair and gets ready to walk back to the green room.]

crew member: we actually got a surprise for you.

[she turns around and there stands beomgyu who's smiling.]

beomgyu: heard you wanna catch up.

kadia: from who?

[he points at the person who was asking all the questions.]

kadia: i mean, sure, if you wanna.

beomgyu: i'm here aren't i?

kadia: give me a minute.

[mmoxie]

To Make an Easy Job

I don't know how this is going to sound, but I need to spill my guts about retail. We all hate it, but this isn't going to be about hating it. At least, not in the traditional way. No mention of angry middle-aged women or soft-boiled khaki-shorts dads outside of this sentence disqualifying them. Okay? Let's go.

Nearly four years ago, I left a retail pharmacy job where I did a great deal of work for little genuine benefit. In a county where minimum wage was on the rise, I started beneath it and then, when it became law, upgraded to it. I started as an overnight clerk, stocking shelves and playing Yu-Gi-Oh on my phone with another transplant like myself. He was on the register, I was on the floor, and we both had a thickly-accented laugh at the shitheads who came in to bother us all night.

And that's important, calling them shitheads. Nine in ten weren't coming in to shop, they were coming in to work out some unresolved issues on our shelves. The tenth in ten were pregnant folks who needed a 24 hour pharmacy for emergency reasons.

So already, that's a lot of stress. Then they slashed the store's hours in half, and me and my friend didn't see each other for a while. I went to a new location because the hour budget couldn't support keeping me on staff at that one, and then quit from the new location because working that job without someone to play YGO with all night turned out to be a joyless parade of cigarette sales and bra money.

My wages didn't go up. I left. Took on a new job. Got sick for one day too many. Got fired. Called my old boss who said I was "always welcome on her team." She was no longer leading a team, but she referred me to another old boss, at my first location, who had an opening.

So I was back to playing YGO with my bud. But the place had made him so mad in my absence that he was on his way out to a nearby grocery store. In the meanwhile, I was so badly in need of a raise that I leveraged the time I spent with the company (and the fact that I came back) to promote up to "shift lead."

I put on a vest and had a panic attack for a year and a half, and then I was fired for an expression of dismay that you can't say on TV, spoken in reaction to a former coworker being racist, again.

A three-month job hunt landed me at a large grocery chain. The kind that sells groceries on one end and furniture on the other. I was looking for an overnight freight job so that I wouldn't have to do a lot of socializing, and even though they interviewed me for one, they told me they didn't have one open- but they did have a "garden clerk" position available.

I took it. I grew up around plants. I wasn't the most useful hand at my great-grandparents' farm, but I had helped water the blueberries and the collards. I had a healthy interest in plants, even if I didn't have any complete formal education on the matter. I took Latin in high school (because the French teacher was very suddenly fired) and that helped me understand the scientific names of plants- which I could turn into care regimens. Lots of Asteraceae out in the garden center, and if I could understand what that kind of plant needs, I'd lead a pretty comfortable life in the garden.

Well, I was wrong about that. About the comfortable life thing, I mean. No amount of learning can prepare you for being led by someone you don't trust. My boss had been hired a month before me, and- with me having just been a manager myself- had a hard time with anything that wasn't subordinate kowtowing.

I listened to what he said, thought critically about it, and offered practical solutions. But they weren't his solutions, or the solutions that his boss suggested- so, even if they achieved an identical end, the methodology coming from me was poison to him, and he made a big show of gagging on it.

And then he disappeared for eight months.

I still don't know what happened, but after not getting along for the better part of the year, he developed a mysterious health problem and stopped showing up without warning. The schedule was marked "leave of absence," and it also left me as the only person assigned to work in the garden.

So I started doing what I wanted. The autonomy made my heart feel like it had grown wings. I was fixing holes in fences, restoring damaged fixtures, getting a missing panel in the ceiling replaced so that it'd stop raining on the register, and- let's be real- missing out on a lot of necessary work to keep the department running, because they neither alerted me to the need for it, or trained me about it.

Our shelves grew bare, and they asked me why. When I told them I didn't know, they decided they didn't appreciate the truth. Rather than train me, they distracted a middle-manager from running the department and sent him out to pick up on little, computery jobs that I'd never heard of, in the year that I'd been too busy watering plants and hauling thousand-pound pallets of soil around.

Eventually my manager came back. Demoted to cashier as the only way of keeping him on shift. I later found out that sometimes they'll cut deals like that, just to keep their retention percentage over a certain threshold. The demotion certainly didn't make his attitude any better, and he took it out on customers. He was fired within a few months.

Meanwhile, they were asking me to promote to his old job. Remembering my promotion at the old store, I declined, and instead took a bit of a "side-grade" that would bring me into the store and out of the weather.

I grew to miss the weather immediately. Now my world was rolling out of bed and unpacking a heavy pallet of hammers, plungers, shop-vacs and spray paint for nine hours a day. All the peace and comfort of watering to keep something alive had been replaced with the soulless analog of "make sure this number goes up, and that number goes down."

It couldn't last. But before I could leave it, something unprecedented happened. For the first time in 20 years, my section was being renovated! Wow!

...What do you mean they're not sending a team in?

Shifts start at four in the morning? I'll be leading a team so we can do it ourselves? We're physically removing two aisles from the store, and rebuilding the other nine by hand?

Okay. Sure. Let's go.

It was around this time I started to have trouble with the department head. We won't spend too much time on her- the important thing is, she did a small amount of physical labor, spent the rest of her shift writing emails about it, and then grew completely outraged when I told her that she would understand the team's actions better if, instead of arbitrarily assigning us new tasks every day based on her emails, she worked with the team to understand how we were flowing through the remodel.

So I've got a bit of a mouth on me. At least I didn't swear this time.

I didn't get fired, and we finished the renovation. By then I was absolutely sick to death of working in hardware, and the garden manager position had been vacated once again.

So this time, I took it. I took it, and I reflected on three years of mistakes and mismanagement and neglect and failure-to-train, and I said "okay, let's change how we do this."

I immediately got in trouble for doing my own thing regardless of the positive results.

So I fought, and fought again. I described the effort I made and why I made it to people who didn't care, and never would, until they gave me a scrap of my autonomy back.

After a few months- once Christmas had passed and I had rebuilt the garden by hand, with limited help from the few people who could be spared for a couple hours at a time to tinker on it with me- they started hiring people into my old position.

New garden clerks. And I was in charge of them.

Things would be different for them than it had been for me. This time the person leading them had experience, knew what to expect, and had been prepared. This time we knew exactly how much the business was going to let us down, and we could have our landing all planned out for when they inevitably buckled and failed.

Every day, they come in and water plants. They occasionally compost the plants that slip our attention- in a yard of thousands, sometimes a few 4" cups will run dry in the process of watering them all. They move out a pallet of new freight every now and then- bags of soil, some rakes and shovels, sprinklers and valves.

They aren't being asked to be their own manager. When they need me for clarity, or for a heavy lift, or to handle someone who's taking out their pent up aggression on our cashier, I'm right there.

When I left the old pharmacy, I wanted an easier job.

I never got one, but I made three. And as they come and go- which is something you're expected to do, working retail- they aren't in a hurry to disappear, and the people coming in to fill their roles aren't afraid of what's coming.

I'm tired, and I'll be tired for the rest of my life, but I feel like I carved out an oasis deep in the heart of retail labor, where they really can do the amount of work they agreed to do, be fairly paid for it, and go home with their backs unbent and spirits high.

They can, not me. But at least someone is, and that's what I wanted-

To make an easy job.

[jadebunbun]

I think.... I have too many people I want to be friends with

I would say too many friends but people would probably be like "well if it's too many then how can you call them friends" which like fuck you, if I like a persona and they like me back then i say where friends

Like... I have people I've been talking with for over a year, a lot of people, and I have people I've known for three years, and people I've known for over a decade, and it's... Hard to make time for them all. If I make times to hang out and schedule then that's not friendship

That's a chore, I don't want my friends to be chores, my friends are my friends, but it's so hard to spend time with them all

I almost never message first because I don't want to be a bother, I hardly ever reach out, even if it's just to show someone something I feel like I'm bothering people unless it's a very specific interest or joke they've talked about that my brain remembers and says

"hey, they like/do this thing, send it to them", like i send car stuff to oje friend, nier stuff to another, call one friend short, call another friend cute

And then the fact I'm somewhat of a role model for some friends is another layer of pressure

I want to be there for my friends and my family but I feel too spread thin

And then I just... Don't do anything... I veg out, I just sit in my room scrolling Twitter and YouTube shorts for hours until a friend or fam says "hey look at this thing"

And THEN I MISS a bunch of messages because I'm either streaming or cooking or at work or other shit that makes me busy

I feel like a bad friend. I feel like an awful friend. I hate that I've taken up a good spot in a lot people's lives because now I can't ever match up to that

My friends deserve so much better than me. They deserve someone that can talk with them for hours, someone that can actually give advice and chill and play and watch stuff with them.

I don't have the heart to cut out anyone. I genuinely want to be friends, I just... Find it hard to reach out.

To me, a friend to me is someone I like that also likes me and we hang out and talk sometimes...

Earlier this year, someone was in my stream chat and said "what do you think of me" and being that they were my friend i said "oh, i think youre a cool person and yoire a cool artist and i think we're friends" and then later im in their chat and they just...

"why do you need to think about it? What is there to think about? I had this whole thing I wanted to say about you, about how I think it's inspiring that you continue after what you've gone through, about how much of a great person you are"

I... I'd rather think someone is my friend than think someone isn't my friend. I don't understand how thinking someone is my friend is a bad thing

And now even months later, I'm still hung up on that

I've always thought myself as a bad friend, I've never been able to get anyone gifts even though everyone got stuff for me. I've never been able to do stuff for the people that do things for me. It feels like everyone is just... Doesn't need me. But I know that's wrong

I know that's wrong, of course it's wrong. I mean, if no one needed me, no one would go completely out of their way just to hang out with me, just to show me something. Just to say "hey, look at this cool rock" "hey, this song you like is in here" "hey, lets watch doccy who"

"Need" isn't the right word. No one needs me. A need is something you can't live without, like food and shelter and enrichment. No one needs me, but people still want me, want to show me things and get my opinion on things and hear me talk about digimon for the tenth time

People are so cool, I love people, people are so nice to me, why can't I be just as nice back, why can't I show everyone the same amount of love they show me, why do i have panic attacks because i misses someone's message from four hours ago or two minutes ago

I wish I could have shadow clones so much, be able to hang out with everyone, have the time to be able to do things with everyone, and be able to remember it all

There was a time where I was only working on my story, and only playing video games. Now I hardly write and hardly play games outside of streaming. And the emotions I feel are still the same as then.

My parents would tell me stories about when I was younger how I never had friends. I would look out the window to the school across the street and say "all my friends are playing" but id never been to the school before, id never left the yard, id never interacted with any of them

And then I hardly friends while at school. I only got actual friends in the last years of schooling. And now, I have way more friends than little me could ever ask for. I have so many friends with so many different interests and experiences

I have so many friends, so many friends and not enough time to spend with any of them. No time to hear their ramblings, no time to play with them, no time to just be idiots together, no time for the important stuff...

I love you guys, I'm sorry I've been such a shit friend

[peacehopeandrats]

NaNo. Last day of single prompts.

It gets more interesting from here! Send in your requests for two prompt posts, I still have some slots left for the month.

This isn't my best work by fat. I threw it togwther just to get the words out, but that's what these exercises are for. Have some fluffy family angsty stuff.

The first few days that the Golds spent in Florida went perfectly. There was sun, there was sand, there was warmth when it would have been frigid in Maine. Gideon thrived as a toddler exploring the beach and all of the discoveries that come with it. Rumple slowly accepted the fact that he would be seen in "practically nothing" and eventually became lost in his time with their son. Now and then there were romantic moments too.

What Belle hadn't expected was to end up in a heavy foot brace after walking through a hole someone had dug and failed to properly fill in. Rumple had almost gone down with her, but has somehow managed to protect both himself and Gideon in his tumble. Belle hadn't been so lucky.

The entire rest of that day was filed with Rumple’s endless fussing. Even after they left the doctor's office and were back in their hotel room, he couldn't stop himself from worrying. At least once an hour he fiddled with the thermostat to make her more comfortable, then either insisted on asking the front desk for more pillows or another blanket. After half the day of this routine Belle reached her limit and sent him out for Chinese food.

Today her husband was a little more at ease, though he continued to nervously fidget and mutter about her comfort. She had at least managed to convince him some time on the beach would be good for Gideon, though it was clear he didn't think it was good for her.

"Do you have enough shade, sweetheart? Should I move the umbrella? "

"I'm fine, Rumple," she insisted for the tenth time in as many minutes. "Will you please just try and relax? It's a beautiful day."

Rumple's eyes didn't leave hers. She could see the moisture gathering in the deep amber of his gaze and it nearly broke her heart.

"Rumplestiltskin," she muttered softly so that no one around would hear. As she called him she bent forward and grasped both his hands innhers, squeezing them tightly. "This is nothing compared to what we have Ben through before. A few days of rest in this brace and everything will be fine again."

"I just can't bear to see you suffering."

Belle rolled her eyes. "The only thing I've suffered from in the last two days is an annoyingly attentive husband." The words made his lip quiver and she squeezed tighter. "I LOVE you, Rumple."

"You're sure that you are happy?"

"Yes, I'm sure."

Over in the sand, Gideon lifted an arm and seemed to be grabbing for the distant waves. "Mmm Num."

They both turned to follow his gaze and caught sight of someone with an ice cream.

Rumple looked from the distant treat to Belle. "One scoop or two?"

"One," she said, smiling. "Unless we get to share."

Rumple leaned close and whispered in her ear. "Later." Then, with a peck on her cheek, he was up and away, on a quest to hunt down the illusive treat for the two people he loved.

[savethelastdan]

Soulmate AU + Pregnancy Fic (Sesskagu)

Though her time in existence has been short, Kagura is aware that humans and demons believe in soulmates.

She is also aware that she does not have one.

At the horrible moment where she was rooted to the spot, watching Muso come to his end, Naraku had proven that.

"That woman!" The incarnation had wailed and gnashed his teeth. "Kikyo - is she my - "

"Pathetic," Naraku jeered, as the screaming incarnation melded back into his flesh, "Just a lump of useless flesh and desire isn't enough. You'd need a soul of your own, first."

Because she tries not to think of that incident, Kagura doesn't think much of soulmates either.

-

"Lord Sesshomaru," Rin says, for the millionth time since they left Mount Hakurei, and he wonders what questions his surrogate daughter could possibly have left that neither he nor Jaken have answered. "That man with the purple tears was talking about soulmates. Do I have one?"

Why that damn assassin would speak of such things to a child is absurd. As he usually does with the questions he does not feel like answering, Lord Sesshomaru simply acts like he doesn't hear her.

"What happens when I meet my soulmate? How will I know?"

"Shut up, you stupid girl!" Jaken shrieks, even as he keeps glancing behind to check Rin has not been stolen from them again. "Lord Sesshomaru wouldn't know the answers to your silly questions, since he does not have - "

A sharp click of his jaw, and the kappa flings himself to the ground in reproach.

-

He'd asked similar questions, one time before.

His mother had replied matter-of-factly, that meeting their soulmate would leave a permanent sign on the person.

"Like a wound?" He said, and she cut him off with sharp noise.

"Something gained, not lost."

But other than his demon marks, and the tattoo of his family line, there is nothing Sesshomaru gains from dealing with others.

It doesn't matter to him, and thus he does not ruminate on it often.

-

The world turns darker, as Naraku claws more and more power from the half-made jewel. Kagura crosses paths again and again with the demon Lord of the West, and no matter what she does - call him a coward, kidnap his human pet, throw blades of wind so strong it must leave his lungs aching for hours afterwards - Sesshomaru never puts an end to her life.

It's as good a reason as any, when her master finally falls to the combination of the priestess' arrow and the hanyou's sword, to stick around.

Sesshomaru's lonely, anyway. Ah-Un stays with Rin and Rin stays in the village, after finding the mark on her back in the same spot where Kohaku's jewel shard left a scar on his own. Jaken is company but not good company.

Only Kagura, of all of Naraku's incarnations, remains.

What do you think keeps you alive, Kagome asks her once, curiously and not at all suspicious. Kagura thinks of miasma-stained flowers and gold eyes full of understanding, and does not have an answer.

She thinks she might know, once, when Sesshomaru's mouth brushes against her in the dark. But it's not something she would ever consider in the light.

-

Now, it's the tenth month after her life truly began. And instead of being somewhere interesting, Kagura's sitting in the freezing cold hut of a river-spirit midwife.

She ate less than an hour ago, and she's hungry again. Despite not caring much for meat in the entirety of her short life, all she wants is some kind of bloody flesh to sink her teeth into. Sesshomaru barely has to look in her direction before she's ready to rip his head off.

"Congratulations," the spirit simpers. And despite it all, Kagura's chattering teeth bare in a smile.

-

"Walking is boring," she snaps, tossing a gust of wind into the nearest tree. Sesshomaru doesn't react to the litany of cracking branches; as usual, his attention is entirely focused on her.

The mother of his child, Jaken says, sounding jealous and like he is mocking her at the same time. I suppose we won't be getting rid of you now.

"Regular exercise ensures your health," he says, reciting the words as though they came out of that stupid little scroll that the inane monk from Rin's village whipped out as soon as he'd heard. "And lounging about all day will merely make you restless."

"Whatever." She shreds another tree just for the sake of it. Despite what he thinks, Kagura would love to lounge for the next four months - eating whatever is at hand, wrapping herself in soft blankets, and gossiping. And Sesshomaru could just sit in the corner and watch her; it's all that seems to carry his interest these days.

Not that she's complaining. It's just weird, is all.

"You are not feeling ill," he says, making it sound more like a certainty thanks to his insistence that she walk regularly, rather than a question. Kagura sighs as dramatically as she can and mutters, "No."

She's lucky in that way, it seems. The priestess that she guesses would be considered her sister-in-law, in some manner of human custom, spent almost her entire pregnancy as sick as a dog. (A joke that was sadly unappreciated by everyone Kagura told.) Her half-demon husband had been beside himself with worry, and Kagura is fairly certain that Sesshomaru gets a smug sense of superiority that this is not the case for her.

Kagome's soulmate marks are on both arms, where someone's claws might dig in; and Inuyasha's is a line around the back his neck, as though a string tied around it was yanked quite hard. Kagura thinks about it often, even though it's not like it has anything to do with her.

Even though she shouldn't care.

"I want to go to the mountains to see the snow," she says. Sesshomaru's mouth firms into a thin line. Above them, birds screech in warning as more branches fall apart; Kagura starts to scream back, but holds her tongue fast between her teeth.

"Very well."

She grins wide. Sesshomaru's expression softens - so little a change that anyone who doesn't know him well would never notice - and she rewards him by pulling his arm to rest warm against her abdomen. 

"I think they'll like the cold," she says cheerfully. "See, they're kicking because they're so excited."

Sesshomaru shifts his hand a bit, chasing the baby's movement. Fondness for the both of them hits her like a weapon's strike; soulmates aren't that interesting, anyway, she thinks, watching lines of amusement form around his eyes. I'd still choose you even if I had one.

-

Jaken can't say for sure that neither of them are aware. He only knows what he thinks, and what he believes neither Lord Sesshomaru or the stupid wind witch Kagura would bother to think.

For example, Totosai himself said that Lord Sesshomaru's heart was changed, by compassion for another. Why his Lord would have been affected so by someone as annoying as Kagura, rather than a faithful and eternally loyal companion, is a mystery. But the point remains, nonetheless.

Kagura, as well, still walks around making a problem out of everything despite the fact her master and creator is long dead and gone. Though Jaken doesn't have the nerve to ask Lord Sesshomaru if there is an actual heart in the witch's chest at this particular point in time (they're all much too focused on the baby and its associated organs instead) it certainly makes sense. Where else would she be keeping it?!

In summary: while it is rare for humans, due to their incredibly fragile bodies, Jaken knows of many demons whose soulmate marks don't show on the outside. Who would want to advertise such weakness to all of one's enemies?!

He considers bringing it up only a single moment. The mood was perfect - a gorgeous sunny backdrop, his Lord maintaining a neutral attitude, and Kagura hadn't dragged her sorry behind back from her lollygagging trip yet. Jaken had cleared his throat, readied himself to be recognized for his brilliance, and - was interrupted by the stupid wind witch's return, plus the announcement that she was carrying his Lord’s heir. A new little soul, housed in her body until it was ready. 

I don't see why you shouldn't be glad to hear about it, she'd said with a huge, foolish smile. But if that is the case, then I'll keep it for myself.

You always say pointless things, Lord Sesshomaru had said back, before reaching for her in a manner that always sent Jaken fleeing the room.

Bah! Even recalling it annoys him. Let them figure it out for themselves, after all.

There's too much else to do before the baby comes.

[robininthelabyrinth]

I really like your takes on the Nie brothers! Could you maybe do something with NHS being a sneaky little badass (not that he isn't always) and NMJ being all "wait, you thought I was the brother you should be afraid of? I'll be over here laughing while NHS wrecks you in all ways but physically". I know that's not a lot to go off of so I understand if this doesn't click with you

In Here, With Me - ao3 (chapter 3/3)

People never seemed to understand, and Nie Mingjue was honestly tired of trying to explain it to them.

He’d never been especially good with words, or at least he wasn’t on a personal level. He apparently had a talent for speeches, especially wartime speeches made to soldiers in order to buck up their courage and build up their morale; that was easy enough, standing up in front of them and telling them the same sorts of things he’d been telling himself for years whenever the dreary endless sludge of politics and other people’s unwillingness to move themselves even in their own best interest started getting him down. He could use his height to his advantage there, towering over people, and couple that the strength of his voice – he suspected that half the time people didn’t even really listen to him, just looked at him and made conjectures for the rest, and that was just fine by him. Whatever worked.

But when it came to explaining complicated things like his brother…

Yeah, he had nothing.

Nie Huaisang had never been good at the things the Nie sect usually prized – he was a weak cultivator and bad at fighting, and at some point Nie Mingjue had more or less entirely given up on trying to teach him the fundamentals of saber fighting in favor of teaching him a much more narrowly targeted set of skills, designed to help keep him alive in a pinch. Even with that, he’d whined and complained, dragged his feet and resisted…he didn’t even have significant scholarly talents to make up for it, not really. Nie Mingjue had no taste for art, but those who did suggested (in however polite terms they could manage) that Nie Huaisang’s poetry was wretched, his composition barely serviceable, his attempts at philosophy convoluted and contraindicated, and as for his painting skills…

Well, he could draw birds pretty well.

But he could play a mean game of weiqi, even against Nie Mingjue, and he was lively and personable - nobody ever disliked him, assuming they bothered to pay him attention at all. He liked to barter with merchants whenever he went shopping, and shopping was the one thing he really did do with a passion; he could make the most grim-faced cynic on the street break out into a smile, and collected half a dozen or more free treats every time he went to the marketplace despite them all knowing he could afford their wares if he so wished.

Nie Huaisang, in short, was good for nothing, but he was fun to be around.

He was also – and this was the part Nie Mingjue could never explain to people – one of the most persistent and vindictive sonofabitches to have ever been born.

One would think, wrongly, that Nie Huaisang would have learned to be more forgiving on account of his personal weakness, but in fact, it just seemed to make him even more inclined to get vengeance on those who had wronged him. He bore grudges without ever feeling the weight, as immovable as the mountains – there would be times when something would blow up spectacularly in Nie Mingjue’s face and he’d turn around only to find Nie Huaisang there, smiling at him and reminding him of some grievance from years before.

And that was if he were lucky – if he were unlucky, he’d find himself in some blissful situation, given everything he’d ever wanted, and find Nie Huaisang patting himself on the back for arranging it.

When Nie Mingjue had been forced by the Wen sect’s overweening arrogance to send Nie Huaisang to them for reeducation and indoctrination, about nine-tenths of what he’d felt had been terror, thinking about all the things that the Wen sect could do to his weak little brother who had nothing but good humor to defend himself with. The last tenth, though, had been the lingering thought that he’d been unable to fully banish: I don’t think they know what they’re getting themselves into here.

Sure enough, they hadn’t.

Now, Nie Huaisang hadn’t personally delivered any of the finishing blows there, but then, he never did, preferring to use other people to do it for him - even in vengeance and spying, he was lazy as always. Wen Chao, who had mocked him, had been left to the vengeance of Wei Wuxian with his brand new demonic cultivation; it’d been an ugly sort of death. Wen Zhuliu, who’d threatened him, had ‘accidentally’ gotten his hand broken when Nie Huaisang’s saber had temporarily ‘gone out of control’ and pierced the key meridian of his wrist – those few months of forcing Nie Huaisang to take classes on medicine had clearly not gone to waste – and then been executed by Jiang Cheng with his steely-eyed hatred. Wen Ruohan, who had murdered their father and made Nie Mingjue’s life a living hell for years, had seen his sons murdered, his empire destroyed, his war lost, and in the end had been stabbed in the back by a trusted subordinate.

Throughout, no one had paid any attention to poor little Nie Huaisang, preserved only through the Wen sect's desire to humiliate the Nie sect by using him as a clown.

Even Lan Xichen, who ought to know better, had persisted in comforting Nie Mingjue throughout the war regarding Nie Huaisang’s health, as if Baxia wasn’t full up on all the complaints Nie Huaisang could possibly fit in given the size of his saber and the quantity of his qi. Meng Yao knew, Nie Mingjue supposed, but that was because he was himself another object of Nie Huaisang’s vengeance – he’d find himself with everything he’d ever wanted, the poor man, and in Nie Huaisang’s eternal debt to boot.

Poor, poor man.

It was a good thing for everyone, Nie Mingjue reflected, that he was too virtuous to sic Nie Huaisang on people.

Usually.

“You promised me that Jiang Cheng would be made Chief Cultivator instead of me,” he reminded Nie Huaisang, who sighed dramatically. “Huaisang. You promised.”

“I promised I’d try, da-ge!”

Nie Mingjue crossed his arms and glared.

“It’s a work in progress, all right? I’m going to have er-ge suggest it.”

Nie Mingjue’s eyebrows went up. “Xichen? How?”

“As a wedding present to his new in-law –”

Nie Mingjue held up a hand. “Stop right there. Who’s getting married?”

“Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji,” Nie Huaisang said obediently.

Nie Mingjue thought about their respective personalities and started to detect the start of a headache. “Which one are you punishing for some unremembered petty slight, this time?”

“Neither!”

Nie Mingjue gave him a look.

“…Wei-xiong screwed up helping me cheat on a test, and Lan Zhan bit me.”

“He bit you? How old was he, five?”

“Six! Old enough to know better!”

Nie Mingjue rolled his eyes. “And which one is going to think that they owe you their lives for arranging this?”

“Lan Zhan knows I’m working on it,” Nie Huaisang said promptly, and Nie Mingjue nodded. That made sense: Lan Wangji was honorable and dependable, and would be easy to extract things out of in the future if things went the way he wanted. “Also, Mistress Wen promised to give me anything I want if I can make Wei-xiong stop pining.”

“Mistress Wen? You mean Wen Qing?” Nie Mingjue’s eyes narrowed. “She’s a doctor, isn’t she?”

“Her brother Wen Ning helped poison a whole bunch of Wen sect soldiers one time, very impressive, you’ll like him,” Nie Huaisang said, not answering the question. “It’s the least I can do, really!”

“Huaisang…”

“Listen, if Wei-xiong and Lan Zhan are going to start their own sect up, they’re going to need some support first,” Nie Huaisang said with great dignity. “We’re not taking in the Wen sect, we’ll just be housing them for a little while, that’s all!”

“Huaisang…”

Nie Huaisang grinned at him.

Nie Mingjue threw his hands into the air. There was really no point in worrying any more about Nie Huaisang, he decided – ever since he’d found his talent for spying, and for managing other spies, Nie Huaisang had decided that he was going to rearrange the entire cultivation world to his liking in just the same way he’d rearranged the furniture in his quarters in the Unclean Realm.

No, really, there was no point in worrying for Nie Huaisang.

Now it was time to worry for everyone else.

[moonlit-flowerfield]

Cold Walls, Warm Heart

I actually like this fic, so... take it-

Fic overall Rating: Mature

Chapter Rating: Teen

Relationship: N/A

Characters: Patton, Janus, (mentions of) Logan and Virgil

Trigger Warnings: Speech about death, mentions of suicidal thoughts

Word Count: 2,000

Ao3 Link

Summary: Patton Hart isn't a "desirable" human. He seems to always be happy and never really does much but help others. And while, yes, that's good, a 100% altruistic person isn't wanted anywhere long. His longest residency somewhere was the recent town of Mayfield. He had even managed to make two friends there, a record-breaking two friends. But even that place started to feel like he wasn't welcome there. So, he told himself to go fix that. He went into the forest with practically nothing, just a small bag of food and a change of clothing for later. And he decided it was time to disappear.

Janus was a Naga who was tired of only having genuine interactions with anyone once a month. Maybe twice if his friend could sneak away. It was chaotic alone in his cave. And by chaotic, he meant very boring. So, when a human makes his way in during a winter storm, supposedly seeking shelter... Well, who was he to not take what he's given?

Cold. It was so bloody cold...

Patton really thought one of the wild forest creatures would have gotten to him by now. But he had wandered rather far by now... It was scary how quiet his trek had been, in all honesty. Logan and Virgil had made it seem like it would have been so much worse than it has. "I need to get somewhere warmer..." He noticed a cave not too far away and decided it was better than nothing. At least he'd be out of the snow...

He got into the cave and stared out at the forest, wondering if he'd make it through to the next town. If he did, would he end up deciding to stay there for a while? Start all over again? It wouldn't have been near even just the tenth time... What would that be... the 40th? A small sigh escaped the man's lips, a puff of the condensation filling the air. And then he saw one that he didn't create.

"What are you doing here, human?" The voice that spoke was calm but filled with emotions. But Patton couldn't place what emotions. Probably because he was terrified, but he also didn't exactly register that feeling quite yet.

"I-I was looking for shelter... I can't handle the cold for long..." He said. Not exactly a lie, at least on the surface. It was honestly very cold and he'd been out in it all day long. He wouldn't be surprised if he would pass out tonight and never wake up.

"And so you came to a cave? You must know what this forest houses, correct?" The voice seemed to hover right behind him, but Patton didn't dare look. If this creature was angry and made a move, he didn't want to see his possible demise coming. He was funny like that.

"I... kinda know... I didn't know some live in caves..." Again, not a complete lie. He knew there was a fae kingdom in this forest. But he also knew there were a few other creatures who were allies to the fae that lived in and around the cave systems in the forest. He assumed this voice was one. "Do you live in this cave?"

The voice went silent for a while like it was judging Patton's answers. "Lying becomes you not, little human." Paton's breath hitched because he didn't really notice he had been lying. His terror finally hit him and he panicked. "You crave something... Something you will not receive from any who live in the forest or cave networks." Wait, what?

"I don't understand what you mean..."

"You crave death. Oh, you may deny it, but the subconscious you wants it more than anything currently. You tell half-truths as if to try to convince yourself that you don't want to perish. But you wouldn't come into the forest in winter with little to stay warm if you had planned to return to your human village." The voice became more clear with its emotions. It was confused, interested and worried. "So why do you hope to disappear? Hm? You seem to be relatively smart... I cannot tell from behind, but you seem to be quite attractive... And your voice is nothing but melodious." Was... Is this creature interested in him? "You surely have people to return to who care for you. I am curious to know why one human such as you would wish to leave the world."

Patton tried to keep from turning around. He couldn't honestly believe what the creature had said about him. No human had called him attractive, said he had a nice voice or even called him anything close to smart. Sure, his acquaintances, Logan and Virgil, complimented him but they still never said anything like that. The closest they had said to any of those things was that Patton didn't hurt to look at, but he wasn't sure if they were trying to say if he looked better than most of the village people or if they were genuinely saying he was good looking. He realized that the voice had gone silent as if waiting on an actual answer. "...I... I'd rather not say..." He didn't feel like burdening a stranger with his issues. "It doesn't matter..."

The voice hummed a little, not in amusement but rather in frustration. "Fine then. Tell me your name, little human." Not a question, a demand.

"P-Patton... Hart..." He heard another hum, this one growing even closer. He could feel the creature place hands on his shoulders and a face pressed against his cheek. The "skin" was colder than he had expected and he was sure he felt scales on his skin rather than actual skin. "I-I can head out once I've warmed up... S-So I don't bother you..."

"No. I will not allow that." He noticed something was wrapping around his waist and became unable to stop his breathing from speeding up. "You are staying here. With me." Patton looked down, seeing a snake tail.

"Y-You're-" He couldn't bring the word out. The creature holding his waist moved its torso into his view. Before him was a Naga, with half his human body covered in scales and a tail that just went on into the darkness. Patton wasn't sure how to feel about the Naga before him holding him and not letting him leave.

"A Naga? Yes, I am." Patton noticed the tone of the Naga's voice was laced with something. Perhaps that's why he felt uneasy... "You need not fear me, however. I will not harm you," the Naga said. He noticed the tone of the Naga's voice changed, no longer feeling laced. "I just want genuine interactions."

"G-Genuine interactions? Y-You're t-technically kidnapping me!" Patton didn't mean to seem upset or even rude. This Naga was right about why he came into the forest and even though he didn't want to admit it, he was very cold and didn't want to die to the cruel winter. He'd rather it seem less like he was trying to relieve himself of living and more like an accident or murder. "Wh-What kind of 'genuine interaction' are you thinking you'll get?!"

The Naga hummed, this one actually being amused. He started to move them both deeper into the cave, just letting out a small chuckle before letting out an answer. "One that isn't caused by hypnosis or a royal duty. I don't get that often enough," he said. "I can't say I expect one of happiness, considering why you even ended up at my den and the fact that I won't let you go until I've deemed you safe enough to return to your village." The Naga ducked his head, then made sure Patton did the same, before sighing. "Perhaps one day, but I can concede that it will probably not be while you stay with me. Pardon the fact that the bedding is so horrid, I hadn't expected a human to stay here. I'll have my friend work on getting better ones for your stay." Patton noticed they had stopped moving, trying to make out what this part could be.  "Your... B-Bedroom?" A happy hiss-like sound emerged from the snake monster.

"Yessssss, I suppose that's what you humans call your living quarters. Though I am unsure if that is the proper wording, as I don't recall Remus saying human dwellings have kitchens across from where they sleep. This just happens to be the warmest part of the cave that didn't need runes and spells to enhance it to a ridiculous extent." The naga set Patton on the bedding, as he called it, so he could grab a few blankets. He turned to Patton once he had three in his arms before he draped them on and around Patton's shoulders. "That should warm you more. If it's still too cold, I'll futz with the runes for heat and add some more layers to the spells."

"Wh... O-Okay..." Patton curled into himself and the blankets, glad for the warmth but scared for many other things. "Um, M-Mister Naga-"

"Janus. My name is Janus."

"R-Right... Mister Janus," Patton paused a little to see if there would be any other adjustments to what he was supposed to call Janus, then continued when there were none. "Wh-Why do you care about me?"

Janus hummed once more, laying down on the bedding and coiling around Patton to get into a position where they were cuddling. "That is a curious thing, isn't it? Why would a monster such as myself care for a fragile human like you? It might seem odd to say, but because I'm selfish. I'm not keeping you until you are better for your sake. No, it is for my own. Until you are mentally safe enough to return to where you came from, I will have a companion. The healthier you are, the more of a threat to the Fae you become, however. And you trying to perish in their kingdom is just rude. So, I suspect that once Prince Roman and Prince Remus learn of you, they will either call for your enslavement or personally escort you to the edge of their land. Depending on how you are when they meet you will truly determine if they end up deciding your threat level." Janus let out a yawn, pulling Patton into a hug with his arms. "But, as long as you don't try to kill me, you will have me as someone to vouch for you. Now, little human, you require sleep to become physically better from the clear sickness that the winter air has given you and I was actually just getting ready to sleep when I sensed you. We both want to sleep," he said. Patton frowned, his glasses feeling uncomfortable on his face. Janus removed the glasses and set them on a rock that seemed to be the bedside table. When he spoke again, his voice almost lulled Patton to sleep alone. "Sleep, little human. We start trying to retrain your brain in the morn."

Patton tried to stay awake. He honestly fought for what felt like a long while against the need to close his eyes. Unfortunately, he lost the battle and curled into the Naga with a sigh before falling unconscious.

---

Janus watched the human fall asleep. He hadn't expected them to be able to combat the suggestion power he had laced his voice with for as long as they had, even though it wasn't very long. It had been, maybe, 3 minutes worth of fighting. Still, that was still rather impressive, especially considering the strength he had put into it. If his new companion had never been hypnotized before, he must have had really had some strong emotion guiding his actions. Then again, Janus never really did the full-on hypnosis. He didn't like that feeling of pure control, and he tended to save it for the ones who tried attacking the forest or specifically him. After all, when your brain goes into a blank state, you tend to not be violent.

However, his own mind could have used the suggestion as well. All he had said about the human was true. They seemed at the very least somewhat intelligent, had a voice he could compare to a siren's song, and was physically attractive to the eye. Janus couldn't say much for the human's personality, but from what he had seen, that also wasn't a bad quality. So why? Why did this human risk their life on purpose? What drew them to try and perish at the hand of a guardian of the forest or a Fae royal guard? Surely they had family who cared, if not friends who wished them well? These thoughts filled his mind and, eventually, he just sighed. Thinking about it wasn't going to get him anywhere, at least not right now. He needed to sleep, wake up early and then start figuring out how to help while knowing nothing. So that's what he did.

[spirantization]

Fandom-related asks for you: A, D, W?

Thank you for asking!! This day has been a day of Putting Out Fires so I had to actually Do My Job instead of answering fandom questions, like some sort of real adult.

A. Your Current OTP

I am a bit in between fandoms at the moment. A few months ago I would have said Lucifer/Chloe, but the ending of the show was such a disappointment that a couple weeks after the final season aired I dropped it completely. I had fun while it lasted, no hard feelings, but at some point I thought "I'm not having fun with this anymore" and that was it. There are a few in-progress fics I'll go back and read, but I'm not interested in writing fic or engaging any further in the fandom.

What I have been watching & reading is prequel series era Star Wars. Something about Anakin & Padmé's trashfire forbidden romance and the fandom's insistence on writing AU and time travel fix-its is deeply mesmerizing to me. I love them and people who hate the prequels are wrong, actually. I am waiting for the Obi-Wan miniseries to come out and I need the following scenes: a) Obi-Wan has a vision of an alternate universe where Anakin isn't a fucking idiot and just leaves the Jedi Order and raises his kids and is a great trophy husband for his hot senator wife; and b) a present-day scene where Darth Vader has a super secret Padmé shrine on his emo fortress where he goes to wheeze sadly and hate himself.

D. What was the first thing you ever contributed to a fandom?

I mean, it was Harry Potter because of course it was. I read and lurked for a really long time, but I got involved with the fandom with the Unknowable Room group in... idk, 2005? I wrote some truly terrible Lily/James fic that is now associated with my Ao3 account, but probably spent most of my time hanging out on the UR.org forum where we were all obsessed with "hijacking", which pretty much meant going off-topic. I don't know, it was the early 2000s. There are several people from those days that I'm still friends with now and have met in real life, so even though HP itself has become tainted, I can't ignore how it has shaped my online presence and connections and friendships I have made.

W. 5 favourite characters from 5 different fandoms

Okay let's go right across the board here, in no particular order:

Keladry of Mindelan (Tamora Pierce books)

The Tenth Doctor (Doctor Who)

Aang (Avatar the Last Airbender)

Chloe Decker (Lucifer)

Sarah Manning (Orphan Black)

[angloie]

Charms.

(1/?)

> Percy likes to deceive. Lie, manipulate, more lies; it was a part of his job, after all. Annabeth has been deceived. Lied to. Manipulated. She's an woman of many secrets- secrets she'd rather not let anyone know.

> Assassin! Percy x CEO! Annabeth.

> Warnings: Mostly angst + fluff, character death and some violence. Nothing too explicit. Mentions of blood/mild injuries as well as alcohol. (characters are aged up!)

pt. 2 || pt. 3 || pt. 4 || pt. 5

Percy's thumb rule was never do anything he didn't want.

To live a happy and healthy life, that was completely normal; especially for such a laid back guy like him.

Choosing this... rather wild career was something he wanted to do, willingly. Life was short, so why not make the most of it? It was getting awfully bleak with the normal civilian life. After all, no one would believe the nice young man who helped the old man carry the groceries to his car would be someone who killed for a living. A smile so bright that it could give the sun a run for its money and warm sea green eyes could hide so much more than just innocence.

The ceiling to floor windows of his penthouse showed a breathtaking view of the New York skyline, sun moving behind the tall buildings and moon replacing the orange hue. Being an assassin had its perks- despite endangering his life on multiple occasions. The pay was just out of this world. All that cash just to kill off some sleazy politician, or that one corrupt buisness man? Sign him up. Zero hesitation.

Percy frowned at the dried blood on his once pure white gloves. He was quick to peel them off. He shuddered at the unsightly view of a small stain of blood on his onyx-colored suit.

He would just buy a new one later. Small things like that didn't matter. Sure, that might've been a gift from one of his clients, but it wasn't anything he couldn't replace.

Hanging his coat on the rack beside the wide entrance, he sighed with clear tiredness. One night of forced politeness and smiles took a toll on him- Also due to the fact that he had just done his job as an assassin. It wasn't what you could call easy.

His muscles were aching and sore in all the worst places, every move throbbing with full pain. The shallow slash on his lower abdomen had soaked his shirt in a dark crimson red, most likely going to leave a bad stain. He would have to clean that later.

The penthouse was big and rather spacious. White Walls and abstract paintings lined them, reflecting off the almost pristine marble floors. It took a while for Percy to get settled in, it being a huge place and all that. But he soon made it feel like home with the help of old picture frames that held memories and the Nemo stuffed animals resting on the leather couch.

“WOOF!”

And Mrs. O'leary.

Mrs.O’leary- a huge, slobbering dog with thick black fur- bounded towards him in a frenzied greeting. She hopped up on her hind legs to lick his face, tail wagging at a unmatched speed. She barked again, this time more quieter.

“Yeah, yeah. It's nice to see you too.” Percy laughed as he tried to pull away. Once he went to the kitchen to grab a bone-shaped treat. “Who’s a good girl?” He cooed, tossing the snack in the air. Mrs.O’leary jumped up to snatch it before barking and padding away. Her tail still wagged with elation.

When Percy first moved here, it was quite nerve-racking. He'd heard that this place was an especially good spot for people like him- meaning people who did some illegal activity. Well, that was what he assumed. Percy was 99% sure that his neighbor just in the penthouse below him, (Leo was it?) had to be involved in some sketchy stuff. That creepy smile of his with a mysterious staining his shirt never meant any good. Or maybe when his other neighbor, had a odd looking duffel bag slung across his shoulder. Oddly human shaped, maybe. With a horrible smell of something rotting. Percy recalled introducing himself a Nico DiAngelo. A pretty reserved and quiet guy, usually having a frown of his face. Well, other than that time when he had his boyfriend over, a sunshiney guy with sun-kissed hair. He never got the chance to catch his name.

Wrapping a white cloth around his wound, Percy's met with a sense of familiarity. Fixing his own injuries by himself. It would bee nice to have some help once in a while, but that would mean exposing him. He's definitely not ready to risk that.

Other than his boss and a couple of really close friends, no one knows about this. Percy nearly slipped up once- when a old companion from high school came over to visit, and his small arsenal of weapons were revealed. The little compartment hidden behind a painting. Not another word wasmsaid about it. Percy made up some half-assed excuse about auditioning for a movie so they were fakes.

It didn't take much of a expert, but the were far from fakes.

His phone rang from beside Percy, making him jolt in surprise. The contact name made him smile just the tiniest bit.

"Hey, mom," Percy began. "Why'd you call?"

"Can't your mom check up on you once in a while? How are you?" Sally beamed, cheerful voice on speaker mode.

He walked over to the bathroom where he stood in the full length mirror. A hint of blood seeped through the white bandage; now full wrapped. "Good. How's Paul and Estelle doing?" He asked.

"They're doing great! Me and your step dad went out with Estelle yesterday to see the movies." Sally smiled. "Estelle is growing into such a energetic ball of energy." She joked. "Just like you."

"Is that so?" Percy laughed, splashing his face with water. It felt cool on his skin, causing tiny pricks of coldness to pop up all over.

For a while, him and Sally conversed. She told him about her day (mostly gushing about Paul and Estelle) while Percy smiled and listened. He did his best to hide the fact that he'd been fixing up his wounds in silence. He cursed silently in pain when he touched an sensitive spot on the slash.

"Percy? Are you alright?" Sally asked in concern.

"Yeah! I just... hit my elbow. Its nothing. " He hastily replied.

"Okay," Sally exclaimed in relief. "By the way, when are you going to visit your old woman? Estelle misses you, you know."

"Yeah, well tell her I miss her too." A sense of gloom over took the conversation. "Look, I'm busy now but..." Percy looked over to the mirror again. "I'll call you later. Maybe I can visit you guys over there soon." He exhaled.

"We're looking forward to it! Isn't that right,             Estelle?" Sally gave the phone to the little girl who was jumping with excitement.

"Come over soon Perce!" She garbled. It sounded like she was eating something halfway.

"I will. Talk to you later, 'Kay?"

"'Kay!"

A wave of guilt overwashed Percy as soon as he ended the call. It was killing him inside, to not be honest with them about his real job. They just thought he was a simple marine biologist who got one hell of a promotion. Yeah, he wished. That seemed easier than killing for a living. He was going to tell them sooner or later. He just had to. Not today- not anytime soon, that is.

Jolting himself out of his thoughts, Percy's phone rang. He was quick to answer it. Was it Sally calling again? Percy put down the metal spoon he was holding, letting it rest in the pot of soup bubbling on the flat stove. 

“Hey, Percy!” The horribly familiar voice rang from the other side of the line. Percy grimaced.

“What is it?” He groaned.

“Is that any way to talk to your boss?” He tsked. “But I have news for you!”

“Do tell,” Percy muttered and went back to his soup. 

“I have a mission.” Apollo grinned widely. “You up for it?”

“Again? Didn't I just do one yesterday?” Percy rolled his eyes. He was tired; completely tired. Usually the missions weren't this close together- sometimes they could be even months apart.

“Yeah, but this one won't happen for a week or so. And it ain't just the typical mission.”

“Yeah? And what's that?”

“Its a info operation. Meaning-”

“I know what that means!” Percy interjected. “Just tell me the details already. I’m hungry.”

“Jeez, okay mr. grump. Annabeth Chase. You know her?” Apollo said, scoffing at Percy's tone.

“You mean the owner of that one architecture company? What about her?” He asked.

“She’s connected with Thalia Grace and Luke Castellan.” Appolo explained. “Apparently people have been talking about their new heist that they're planning. By what I've heard, it's going to be huge.” 

Those three names- Thalia Grace, Luke Castellan, Annabeth Chase. Annabeth especially, was the most well known in the regular world. Her being the stoic founder of Athchase as well as being a crazy rich and famous person, that's a no brainer. Luke and Thalia, on the other hand, their heists were well known anywhere. Annabeth didn't have a criminal record of any sorts. That's a big reason she can keep up her reputation. It's not like the woman did anything wrong, its just that... the fact that she is connected with the two is enough to ensure suspicion. Growing rumors of her planning some of their crimes were spreading fast. Percy's heard of things like that, her being the mastermind of killing and stealing.

“Alright," He nodded. "Im interested. Go on."

“New York. That's where the three plan to meet up. Get information, maybe use your charms into getting her to trust you."

"N-new york..!?" Percy was left shocked at that.

"I've booked a flight there. 5 in the morning sharp tomorrow. I reccomend you arrive on time." Apollo chuckled.

"Yeah, whatever."

"And Percy?" He called out.

"Hm?"

"You have my full permission to kill Annabeth when you're done." Apollo darkly said, hanging up without another word. Percy rolled his eyes for the tenth time on the call.

Well, all right.

Next destination: New York.

"So, New York, huh." Annabeth swirled some of her cocktail in the glass, circling her wrist in a rotation. The blue liquid swirled together in a repetitive motion. Sapphire Martini tasted rather bitter on her tounge, but decent nonetheless. She enjoyed the slight orange twist.

"Why here of all places?" She asked.

"Its a golden opportunity, dear Annie. The Olympians only gather once in a blue moon, so we're going to make the most out of this!" Thalia sipped from her own glass, some regular red wine. She'd never had such a taste for 'Those fancy rich drinks'. Whatever that meant.

The Olympians, as Thalia said before, were a group of 12 of some of the wealthiest and prestigious people from across the world. Only a few select people could be a part- it was exclusive as to anybody who was just normal as a couple million rich. New York would be holding a auction quite soon on a famous opera house; and surprise, they would be there.

"Don't call me that." Annabeth winced at the name. "And who exactly is we?"

"Don't go all acting like you didn't agree, alright? Plus, you can gain a thing or two from all this." She grinned.

"I have a company to run, Thals, You know very well that I dropped that type of business years ago." Annabeth shook her head. "This is seriously risky."

"But you love that. Don't you?" Thalia pressed, standing up.

She truly did. The thrill, the rush of energy you couldn't get anywhere else. Thats what had driven her to join Thalia and Luke in the first place. That feeling alone made her eyes sparkle with desire.

"Yeah." Annabeth places her drinkdown back on the glass table. "I do."

Okay I'm back with some more hot garbage!!! here's my latest thing-- a assassin au. I need to do a ship other than percabeth tho 😔😔

[lyrishadow]

Fictober 5: wait

Prompt 5: “I’m not saying I told you so…”

Fandom: Mass Effect.

Title: Wait.

Pairing: Kaidan Alenko/ Syrena Shepard

Rating: T

Warnings/Tags

"Syrena Shepard." A familiar voice brought her up short.

"What?"

"They said you were all grown up and being good."

"Back off Finch, didn't they tell you what happened to the last person the Red sent after me?" Syrena could already feel Kaidan tense up at the name of the old gang, Garrus looked at her confused.

"Oh I'm not after you, we want your help." Finch replied, sliding his arm over her shoulder, a bad move all round. Kaidan reacted faster than Garrus had ever seen him react before.

"Hands off the Commander." He stated through gritted teeth,

"So it's true, you still exist too." Finch grunted as Garrus stepped over to where Kaidan was holding Finch.

"Maybe reevaluate who you are dealing with?"

" Really? Aliens and space magic?" Finch grimaced.

"Let him go." Syrena stated, "Kaidan. Garrus. "

She motioned them back behind her. Finch looked delighted, as they moved, once they were clear however. Syrena slammed the gangster up hard against the wall, a reasonable height off the ground.

"Don't say I didn't tell you so.." she said sweetly "I am no longer a Red, I haven't been for a long long time. You upset or hurt my friends again and so help everyone I will drop you out an airlock."

"Just talk to the turian guard in Chora's, and we won't bother you again." Finch snapped and she dropped him to the floor. "Gods Cherub, you got nasty."

That nickname made Kaidan growl under his breath.

The turian in Chora's Den proved to be some guard of a facility.

"I just had a gang member try and bribe me into dealing with you, can you tell me why?"

"Ah the Tenth Street Reds, running drugs and hate crimes against aliens."

"I see." Syrena shook her head.

"Problem?"

"No, but you might want to increase your guards."

"Noted."

"I knew it!" Finch declared.

"Knew what? I told you: mess with my friends and find an airlock." She shook her head " I didn't say I would help you. I am not that stupid."

Later once they had left the noise of Chora's Den, the three of them headed to have a drink.

"So how do you know each other?" Garrus asked glancing between the two of them,

"I was put into the same biotics program as Kaidan." Syrena replied, glancing at Kaidan.

" It was meant to be rehab, but the Reds found me."

"Rehab for what?"

"I was a street kid Garrus, a thug and a mouthy one too. Funny how meeting Kaidana d some others changed my entire outlook."

"Really?"

"Really. I was taken off station for medical care then it fell apart. So my room-mates family thanked me by paying my way through school and college. Then I joined the Alliance." Rahna, if Kaidan ever wondered about that girl, Syrena knew what happened. If he still fought over the ghost of her, well, then maybe it was time Syrena moved on too.

"And Kaidan?" Garrus frowned.

"I was there the night she got attacked, well her roommate woke us up, my roommate and I ran to help."

"Saved my life."

"Uh yeah. " Kaidan blushed.

"Ok I get it. Wow, that's dramatic and you were both16?"

"Um, he was. I was 14 I think. Yes I'm an L2, exceedingly lucky, no migraines no complications but I do get checked every six months."

"Wow impressive." Garrus nodded "but…"

"Yeah but Kaidan spikes higher, at a cost." Syrena sighed as the omni-tool notification sound drew them all back to reality. "So much for shore leave. Huh Wasn't me, that's first."

Garrus made a face.

"My father wants to talk to me, so I had better go call. See you back at the ship Commander, Lieutenant."

"You okay?" Syrena turned to Kaidan as Garrus walked away.

"I think so,"

"Not going to ask me about Rahna?"

"I don't have feelings for her, if that's the question. You kept in touch?"

"She told everyone who would listen that I saved her life." Syrena shook her head "I ended up with all expenses paid and a stipend to study university. She married a guy her father chose for her. "

"Wow."

"Yeh, that's the last thing I expected, but she is happy doing what she can to change the world." Syrena sighed "I always envied her that happiness, well that and you."

Kaidan blinked as if he hadn't heard her correctly.

"We are on shore leave, I am allowed to tell you aren't I?" Syrena asked quietly, wordlessly Kaidan nodded.

"I remember you being nice to me even when I didn't think I belonged, before I wanted to. " Syrena chuckled "I think I called you a princess."

Kaidan smiled, "You did in fact."

"Well I was interested in you from about then." She shook her head "I've never in the meantime dated anyone else."

"Sy." Kaidan replied.

"Yeah wrong timing, maybe when we get Saren out of the way?"

"I…"

"If you are interested. Gods when did I become someone who talks too much?" Syrena buried her head in her hands.

"Syrena?" Kaidan murmured, closer to her than she had expected.

"Is it safe?" She asked lifting her face to the side his voice had come from only to be met with his lips on hers.

It was like the galaxy froze for just a minute. Then Kaidan pulled back with a sigh.

It was a promise she had waited a long time for.

"Rahna?" Fifteen year old Syrena asked her new friend of a month.

"Yes?"

"What do I do if I have a crush?"

"Wait. If it is meant to be more than a crush the feelings will hold, if it isn't the feelings will fade and new ones will come." Rahna looked up from the homework she was writing on her bed " You like Kaidan?"

"I think. It's new." Syrena replied "Plus you like him, and he likes you. So it doesn't make sense."

"Not right now, we are all kids really, we can't tell the future, so it still stands. Someday we will be in love and that is supposed to be a lot more fun."

"Thanks Rahna,"

"Syrena, friends last through all of that."

It was all new, having friends, people who cared. She would wait and guard these good things with her life.