#I have so many sketches of them grocery shopping

[vanessagillings]

I’m posting the ever-so-rare photo of myself alongside one of my characters based on my childhood because today is World Autism Acceptance Day, and I wanted to show my little corner of the internet who this particular autistic person is:  

I was officially diagnosed in February, at age 38 (I’m now 39). A lot of people thought I couldn’t be autistic.  Some people who know me in real life still don’t.  And until around 10 years ago, I didn’t think I could be either, because I was nothing like the stereotype media portrays. I was told that autistics lacked empathy (untrue), and never played make-believe (also often untrue) and only enjoyed STEM.  I was — and am — an empathetic artist -- and make believe?  I can spend days sketching finely bedecked bears brewing tea or carefully choosing the right words to weave tapestries of fiction — though perhaps my hyper focus was a bit of a red flag.  Even so, how could autism describe me?  I was a good student.  I got straight A's. I didn’t act out in class.  I can make eye contact…if I must.  And lots of girls hate having their hair brushed with an unholy passion, right?  Clearly I swim in sarcasm like a fish, so autism couldn't be why I was so anxious all the time, could it?

If someone had told me when I was younger what autism ACTUALLY is — instead of the nonsense I’d seen on screens — I would have seen myself in it.  I didn’t hear that autistics have sensory issues until I was in my mid-twenties, which is when I first began to really research autism symptoms, and I had almost all of them:  sensitivity to light, smells, fabrics, temperatures, textures, and certain touches, all of which make me feel anxious, I fidget (stim), I never know what the hell to do with my hands or where to look, I talk too little or too much, I have special interests, I have entire animated movies memorized shot-by-shot and can remember the first time and place I saw every movie I've ever seen but I often forget what I'm trying to say mid-sentence, I echo movies and tv shows (my husband and I have a whole repertoire of shared echolalias, making up about 20% of our conversations), I was in speech therapy as a kid, I have issues with dysnomia and verbal fluency, I toe-walk, I can't multitask to save my life, I like things just-so, I’m deeply introverted but not shy, I need to recover from all social interaction — even social interaction I enjoy — and I find stupid, every day things like grocery shopping, driving and making appointments overwhelming and intensely stressful, sometimes to the point where I struggle to speak.  It turns out, I am definitely autistic. My results weren't borderline. Not even close. And while these aren’t all of my challenges, and not everyone with these symptoms is autistic, it’s definitely something to look into if you present with all of these things at once. 

So why did it take me so long to get diagnosed? The same bias that exists in media threads through the medical community as well, and because I'm a woman who can discuss the weather while smiling on cue, few people thought I was worth looking into. Even after I was fairly certain I was autistic, receiving an official diagnosis in the US is unnecessarily difficult and expensive, and in my case, completely uncovered by my insurance.  It cost me over $4000, and I could only afford it because my husband makes more money than I do as a freelance illustrator — a job I fell into largely because it didn’t require in-person work; like many autists, I have been chronically underemployed and underpaid, in part due to physical illness in my twenties, which is a topic for another day.  But it shouldn’t be like this.  It shouldn’t be so hard for adults to receive diagnoses and it shouldn’t be so hard for people to see themselves in this condition to begin with due to misinformation and stereotypes. Like many issues in America, these barriers are even higher for marginalized groups with multiple intersectionalities. 

It’s commonly said that if you’ve met one autistic person, you’ve met one autistic person.  This is why it’s called a spectrum, not because there’s a linear progression of severity (someone who appears to have low support needs like myself might need more than it seems, and vice versa), but because every autistic person has their own strengths and weaknesses, challenges and experiences, opinions and needs.  No two people on the spectrum present in the same way.  And that’s a good thing!  No way of being autistic is inherently any better than any other, and even if someone on the spectrum struggles with things I don’t — or can do things I can’t — doesn’t make them more or less deserving of respect and human dignity.

But speaking solely for myself, the more I learn about autism, the happier I am to be autistic.  I struggle to find words and exert fine motor control, but my deep passion and fixation has made me good at art and storytelling anyway.  I find more joy watching dogs and studying leaf shapes on my walks than most people do in an entire day.  More often than not, the barriers I’ve faced weren’t due to my autism directly, but due to society being overly rigid about what it considers a valid way of existing.  My hope in writing this today is that maybe one person will realize that autism isn’t what they thought — and that being different is not the same as being less than. My hope with my fiction is to give autistic children mirrors with which to see themselves, and everyone else windows through which to see us as we actually are.

If you’re interested in learning more about autism or think you might be autistic, too, I recommend the Autism Self Advocacy Network  autisticadvocacy.org and the following books:

What I Mean When I Say I’m Autistic by Annie Kotowicz

We're Not Broken by Eric Garcia

Knowing Why edited by Elizabeth Bartmess

Unmasking Autism by Devon Price, PhD

Loud Hands edited by Julia Bascom

Neurotribes by Steve Silberman

(trigger warning: the last two contain quite a lot of upsetting material involving institutionalized child abuse, but I think it’s important for people to know how often autistic children were — and are — abused simply for being neurodivergent).

Thanks for reading 💛

[mrshesh]

hi! do you have any general hcs for the cod:ghosts boys?

general headcanons - call of duty: ghost's

overview: general headcanons of the call of duty: ghost's boys!

pairing: none!

genre: fluff, pure tomfoolery

a/n: hi anon! i'm thrilled i finally got a request for these boys. i love them so much, it's getting a bit unhealthy. you're truly the best for requesting them! i hope you love it!

x logan walker

He sucks at puzzles. He’s smart and tactical, but puzzles are on another level of difficulty for him. 

He likes doodling a lot. If he has a pen and a surface to draw on, he will sketch a small smiley or a caterpillar. It has become such a habit that he doesn’t even think about it when he does it. It got so bad that once, Keegan called him out on it mid-doodle, leaving Logan embarrassed for a week. 

He loves the ocean, but beaches annoy him. He hates sand. (I firmly believe his hate for them is from Hesh throwing sand in his face as children.)

He has a picture of him and Hesh as kids in his wallet. He feels calmer when he looks at it, getting into the habit of peeking at it when stressed. 

He’s an avid Deftones enjoyer. He loves Beware and Diamond Eyes. 

He likes caramel-scented things, but he doesn’t like the taste of it. 

He has some insane dirt on Elias, and, of course, Hesh knows all of it. 

For some odd reason, he’s phenomenal at parallel parking. 

x david "hesh" walker

He loves movies. He can watch any genre! Horror? Great! Action? Love. Romance? Cute! Comedy? Perfect! He loves it all. Shows, however? Nope. 

He takes pride in his nails being clipped and filed at all times. He was a nailbiter in his teens, so he cares about his nails more than he should today. 

He can’t cook to save his life. 

Eminem is his go-to artist. He loves and respects many artists, but Eminem will always be at the top of his list. He loves Stan. 

He’s respectful in general.

He’s extremely secure and confident, yet he’s still pretty nervous when he talks to girls. 

He loves long car rides. Driving around in his car while listening to his favorite songs brings out a unique joy in him. 

He, unlike Logan, loves beaches! (He wasn’t the one who got sand thrown on him, so he’s thriving.) 

He hates coriander. 

x elias "scarecrow" walker

Unlike his son, Elias is great at puzzles! He’s disappointed Logan didn’t inherit that quality. He mourns it every day. 

He loves pickles. (Same.)

He manipulated himself into liking beer many years ago. 

People call him DILF all the time. It has happened too many times to count. He finds it funny, while Hesh and Logan are horrified every time. 

He doesn’t know how to put on chapstick. He puts it between his lips and swipes it back and forth, not on his lips. 

He got so much action when he was a teenager/young adult. He tells Logan and Hesh to “live a little” so they can experience that life, too. 

He doesn’t listen to music often, but when he does, he listens to either Korn or Chris Isaak. 

He adores Riley, sometimes stealing him from Hesh without warning. 

x keegan russ

He secretly enjoys ASMR. It helps him unwind and de-stress, but not sleep, surprisingly.

He’s excellent at the game Mafia. 

He has made way too many people giggle excitedly because of his voice. He finds it amusing but disturbing at the same time. He knows it’s attractive, but that many people? He has even made Elias giggle like a schoolgirl because of his vocal folds. 

Keegan strikes me as a Slipknot fan. He finds Killpop and Vermillion to be sexy. 

He loves grocery shopping. 

He talks to himself a lot. He’s antisocial and quiet around others, but when Keegan’s alone, he keeps having full-on conversations with himself. Merrick caught him doing it once - he never brought it up again. 

He enjoys lasagna a bit too much. 

He had a motorcycle phase as a young adult. It got so bad he learned how to do a wheelie on them, but his love for them has died down in the many years he’s been alive. 

He thinks wine is gross. 

x thomas merrick

He cannot stand bananas. Everything about them makes him gag. 

He gets such a rise out of being a bitch. He’s already annoying by default but strives to be even more insufferable for the fuck of it.

He, Alex, and Keegan smoke while being sentimental together at least once a month. (It’s always with Keegan and Alex - Elias, David, and Logan get left out.) 

He listens to underground metal like Sold Soul, and he thinks it makes him superior to everyone else. (And he gatekeeps it.)

He’s immune to pretty much all physical pain except for waxing. It’s enough to make him cry. 

He loved trains as a child.

His comfort song is Toxicity by System Of A Down. 

His appetite is insane. This man can eat a horse and still be hungry by the end of it. 

His calves are huge for some reason. 

[maopll]

Hello, hello!

May I request Zhongli, Kaeya, Ayato and Al-Haitham with an s/o that likes to draw them? A LOT. Like, s/o has sketchbooks filled with sketches and drawings of them.

Thank you very much!

My muse I genshin impact !

pt 2 here !

⌗:, where you draw your lover in a secret sketchbook only for it to be revealed....

⌗:, a/n: thanks for the request anon ! it was a creative request actually.I was giggling while writing it. I'm sorry if your request took too long :(

⌗:, warning: mentions of petnames,..love, darling..., mention of Morax,,

,,what can you do when you are an artist and your lover is an absolute delight to your eyes of an artist? just like anyone else you admire his features by sketching portraits of his face, of his body, of his lips. but you are always quick to shut your sketchbook whenever he is near. if he sees it...you would die out of embarrassment....

✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .✧ ˚ 　· 　　 .

KAEYA

our cavalry captain here is so beautiful you drool whenever you remember his face. if there was any person who had a perfect face it would be him and him only.

you have a shelf that has many leather books and drawing sheets but you never told him what they have. ofcouse he respects your privacy so he never asked but while you were out on some business he was in your bedroom when some books were fallen on the ground. while he was picking it up he came across your pieces of him.

curves drawn perfectly, blemishes that he never knew he has yet your eye captured those. you drew him so well that he found his breath caught in his throat. he stored the little picture you made for him but you never noticed it.

The next day when you visited his office you saw the very portrait of kaeya with a calla lily which you drew on his table. "Where did you find this from kaeya !?". you had such a deep blush on your face which made kaeya burst into a laughter.

No matter how much you insist the portrait will be with him forever now and you will not be able to take it from him.

ZHONGLI

he has a statue of himself in many places. through centuries and millenias devotees carved him from high quality jades, golds and precious stones alike.

No matter how famous or talented the craftsman was he when he was Morax, never found those statues to be made from pure devotion alone. Therefore he never expected for anyone to draw him with the love and devotion one might expect.

But you proved him wrong. He found many sketchbooks while cleaning your shared home which had only his portraits. some were romantic while some were a bit sensual nevertheless from just your drawings of him were enough to let him understand the extent of your love for him and your pure devotion. But there was a certain oil painting on a canvas that was only his portrait with his chin resting on the palm of his hand. it was so beautiful with precise strokes that he decided to hang it on the lounge wall.

After you returned from grocery shopping you were stunned to see the painting you stored away only for the one whom you didn't want to ever see it just saw it and decided to hang it on the wall.

"I must apologise for looking through your sketchbooks, love. But...I am indeed quite amazed to see your masterpieces. this one in particular caught my attention so I decided to hang it on the wall. After all..I need to show the guests how well you draw"

AYATO KAMISATO

Yashiro Commisioner Ayato Kamisato has had many portraits, full body sketches drawn ever since the day he was born. He was the son of the esteemed late commissioner and the former Head of a clan so many pieces were made by talented artists from around teyvat.

While he had seen you on many occasions drawing on a sketchbook with pen and or ink he never asked what you drew as you were quite...adamant to not exactly show him what you create. so seeing your behaviour he never asked but while signing through paperwork one late night he found your sketchbook lying. you must have forgotten it and although he told you he would never see it, curiosity got the better of him and he flipped through the pages.

His eyes widened as he saw the countless creations of yours which only centered your one and only muse, Ayato, your lover. He had literal heart on his eyes because all this time you were only drawing your beloved. He kept that book as a lucky charm.

The following day when you ssked him if he saw the leather book you always had he just held out the same while saying "oh? then you must be talking about this" you were bright red as you saw the familiar smirk he had on his face which was enough to tell you that he saw everything.

He chuckled a little and said "your creations are beautiful darling. allow me to express my gratitude, but can I ask you to let me keep this to myself as a token of your affection?"

ALHAITHAM

Alhaitham never really held a fascination towards performing arts but he knew of your admiration towards the same. Since he loved you he never showed any form of disgust towards arts and he never really had one. He just felt that it was not important.

While he would be working in his temporary Acting Grand Sage office you would sit in a nearby chair sometimes and sketch your way in the sketchbook which you always carry. Even kaveh said that your designs are absolutely fantastic but...how come he has seen what you drew but your actual lover never did?

He should admit that he was a bit jealous that his roommate had beat him to your secret sketchbook but he respected your privacy and never asked for it.

Inside your house while alhaitham was skimming through his library for a new physics book he came across your diary. He opened it a little only to find it filled with him and only him. He was taken aback by how you were actually really good at art but also a bit flustered how he was your inspiration.

Hiding the blush he went to talk to you. While you were quite embarrassed yourself and you apologised for drawing him without his consent, he only said that "there's no need for you to apologise love, rather I am glad that i could be a form of inspiration for you and..I hope you will continue to draw me like how you do..". he managed to tell you that all while fighting a blush that spread across his cheeks.

[crackedpumpkin]

ʙʟᴀɴᴋ ᴄᴀɴᴠᴀꜱ || ᴘᴀʀᴛ ɴɪɴᴇ ||

A/N: holy shit guys look its an update omg

[ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 ] | [ 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 ] | [ 𝐦𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 ]

The bed is cold. Your phone sits on the nightstand just right next to it, its usual buzz absent. The sun is slowly rising, its gold-dipped rays slowly but surely shining through the open window of your room. 

You, however, are in the kitchen with your mother who’s fussing over the table filled with numerous potted plants of different sizes. Some almost slapped you in the face with their leaves, while some were the size of your hand. Having walked into this mess first thing in the morning is not the way you expected to start your day. 

“Tell me where you got these from again?” You push away a leaf that nearly pokes you in the eye, glaring at the plant. The audacity. You’re lucky that my mom’s here, or I’d leave you out in the street.

Your mother rolls her eyes with an exasperated sigh, a hand propped on her hip as she waters them. “It just slipped my mind that the delivery is coming today. Besides, I only ordered one. I don’t know how they delivered eleven. You should give some to your friends! It’s good feng shui.” She nods knowingly.

“They don’t believe in that stuff.” 

She shakes her head disapprovingly, moving some of the pots to the end of the dining table. “Oh? Do they open their umbrellas indoors too? Do they cut their toenails at night?”

“Only Michael from what I remember.” You recall, shuddering at the tiny detail your brain retained from the first day of school. 

“Don’t you have school today?” She asks as if only just remembering that her daughter is still a student. “What’re you still doing here? Go, go, go!”

“Calm down dude, we have a late day today. Only gotta be at school by eleven instead of eight.” You laugh, backing away slowly when she narrows her eyes at you. 

“I am not your ‘dude’, I’m your mother, young lady. Where did you learn how to be so impolite to your elders…” She sighs, shaking her head. 

“Jake taught me.” The mere mention of your brother’s name is enough to kill the easygoing atmosphere in the kitchen. You see her shoulders stiffen, though she pretends to continue organising the eleven potted plants. 

“Go take a shower, and get some breakfast outside. I haven’t gone grocery shopping yet.” Pretending that everything is okay is usually your parent’s default response, you’re not surprised by this in the least. 

“Sure,” You say breezily, making your way to the bathroom and swallowing the small lump in your throat. After emerging from your room and determining if you look presentable enough to be around society, you grab your bag and head to the door. 

On your way out, something catches your eye. You pause, eyeing the tiny bamboo succulent sitting on the dining table. “I’m taking this.” She nods in reply, too preoccupied with making a list of groceries to wave goodbye. 

"Peace offering," you murmur to yourself, a half-smile playing on your lips as you glance at the bamboo. The apartment door clicks shut behind you, leaving the atmosphere inside to the grocery list and the lingering traces of unresolved emotions.

Your pocket rustles as you move, shoving a hand in to take out the contract you had stuffed inside earlier. Staring down at the paper that pretty much holds both you and Miles together heightens your guilt for lying to him. 

Sure, maybe lying about your name isn’t a big deal to many, but he’d begun to actually bond with you -  you can tell that much. Furthermore, you’d mostly forgotten about the contract in hanging out with him during your sketching sessions, and it’d become almost a habit to refer to him as a friend in your mind.

But the betrayal on his face that day is more than enough to make you regret everything. Now though, is a chance to make it up to him. To apologise, and to make things right. That’s why you brought the contract along. You have to show him that you’re not a bad person. That you’re sorry.

And to do that, an olive branch is necessary in the form of caffeine. 

You pull out your phone and begin to text him. 

abuelita [ 10:15 AM ]: heya

abuelita [ 10:15 AM ]: are you free today? i have something to pass you

bug [ 10:30 AM ]: i have a couple mins after my evening patrol. 

bug [ 10:30 AM ]: ill be at the lion building rooftop

The rest of school fills you with nothing but nerves, anticipating your meetup with Miles. Even a study session at the library turns out to be unfruitful, to no one’s surprise. Nicole and Michael were initially concerned, but after a simple excuse of being on your period is made, no one else questions your mood.

You make your way to the meeting point, a coffee cup in hand. The hot liquid inside warms your hands in the cool evening breeze. It's a feeble attempt at mending the rift, a different kind of peace offering. The bamboo succulent rests in your hands, now neatly placed in a box. The lift doors open, revealing a lone unmasked superhero sitting down near the edge of the building. 

Upon hearing your footsteps, he turns and looks at you, barely acknowledging your presence with a nod. You wince internally, the lack of acknowledgement stinging more than you anticipated. As you approach the unmasked superhero watching the sunset, you can't shake off the unease settling in.

You sit down beside him. You sit down next to him, maintaining a careful distance. A subtle fidget in his posture hints at the underlying tension between you. He regards you with a mix of curiosity and wariness, taking in the objects in your hands.

“Peace offering,” you repeat, holding up the cup like a truce flag, a sheepish grin on your face as if you’re a five-year-old who got in trouble with their parents. However, Miles's expression remains stoic. He takes the cup from you, studying it with a discerning eye. You hold the gift out toward him, and he accepts it, placing it down beside him.

He takes a slow sip, and a moment of realisation crosses his features. "Is this an iced latte?" he asks, his tone more a statement than a question.

You nod, a playful twinkle in your eye. "Yeah, figured it's a classic. Universally accepted, right?"

Miles wrinkles his nose, pushing the cup away slightly. "I prefer my coffee hot."

Your grin falters, the awkwardness returning. "Right, noted. I'll remember for next time." Your words are cheerfully said, but there's an undeniable undertone of discomfort. “Can we talk?”

He hesitates, but his gaze flickers between the coffee cup in his hand, and the gift next to his bag. “Sure.” 

You sit down next to him, making sure to keep a distance between you both. Wouldn’t want to make him even more pissed than he is now, after all. The evening brings about serenity and peace as the sun begins to set, but a heavy weight hangs between you. You decide to address the elephant in the room. "Miles, I really am sorry. I messed up, and I want to make things right."

He looks at you, the seriousness in his eyes contrasting with the lighthearted atmosphere you tried to create. "Gifts and jokes won't change what happened."

The truth stings, but you nod, acknowledging his point. 

“But forgiveness isn’t fully out of reach, right?” You try once more with a hopeful grin, eyeing the mask next to him as you stand up, walking over to the edge of the building. He shrugs. 

“What makes you think I forgive everyone so easily?”

“Why wouldn’t you? You’re Spiderman.” You state simply, staring at the reflection of the glass opposite you. You look down at Miles who’s slowly standing up with wary eyes. The contract rustles as you pull it out of your pocket, watching his eyes grow wide. 

You stare at the signature on the bottom, a finger tracing the hurried scrawl of his name. The contract itself is the only thing tying you to him, the only reason he even still texts you. He’s the only reason why your art still has a motive - a point in each work. 

So, you rip the contract in half. The sound of torn paper fills the air, and you fold it before tearing it again. Again and again, until it’s torn to nothing but shreds on the ground. As the final piece of paper slips from your grasp, you raise your eyes to find Miles frozen in disbelief. His lips part in silent astonishment, fingers fumbling over words trapped on the tip of his tongue.

“Why?”

“Because,” You answer with a shrug, “You’re Spiderman.” A hesitant smile tugs at your lips, but beneath the surface, guilt gnaws at every fibre of your being. It's a battle, the conflicting emotions waging war within you. “You always save the day.” At that moment, you stare at the torn-up contract, bitterness rising in your throat. Underneath that though, is a genuine urge for forgiveness. 

Is this even enough for him to forgive you? 

Prove yourself. 

The back of your sneaker teeters on the edge, and you glance down at the ground below, gauging the distance. Breathing deeply, an idea occurs to you. A dangerous one.

His silence lingers, but an unexpected calm washes over you, a fragile serenity in the eye of the emotional storm. “You always save the day,” You repeat, “Even if I don’t deserve it.”

With that, you take a step back, watching horror dawn on his face as you fall. 

Miles stumbles forward, his voice caught in his throat. “No!” he shouts, reaching out as if he could defy gravity. His eyes widen, reflecting a mix of fear and realisation of the consequences of your impulsive act. 

The time taken to hurtle down a building toward the ground is much slower than you expect. You turn your head, watching the bright lights of various buildings cast a soft glow over the river nearby. The cityscape unfolds beneath you, a tapestry of shimmering lights that paint the skyscrapers with an ethereal glow. Despite the beauty, a profound sense of loneliness settles in, echoing the vastness of the city below.

It’s quiet.

The wind whistles past your ears, your hair whipping wildly around your face as you watch him dive down the side of the building, his mask back on his face as he holds out his arm desperately. 

A laugh bubbles past your lips, smiling as he reaches you, wrapping his arms around your waist and shooting a web, swinging you to safety. 

“Am I forgiven?” You whisper into his ear, arms on his shoulders as he continues to swing. 

“What?!” He answers loudly, bewilderment in his voice. “You jumped down just for that??”

“Yeah!” You lean back to take a proper look at him, adrenaline rushing through your bloodstream as if a hundred cans of Red Bull had been injected into you at once. “So am I?”

He doesn’t reply, shooting another web at a skyscraper. You smile brightly at him, waiting for an answer. His shoulders start to tremble, and he looks down at the streets below. You begin to hesitate, your smile falling. 

Is he mad? Was it too much?

Your questions are answered when he looks up, laughing his heart out. 

“You’re insane,” He huffs out with a shake of his head, the smile in his voice evident. He looks at you once more. “Yeah, you’re forgiven.”

With a relieved sigh, you press your forehead into his shoulder, closing your eyes. The tension releases from your shoulders, a silent acknowledgement of the emotional weight lifted. “...Can I still draw you?”

— — — — — 

The wind still echoes in your ears as Miles sets you down gently on the rooftop. Your sneakers meet the solid surface, and for a moment, you're both silent, catching your breath. The tension lingers in the air, but the overwhelming rush of adrenaline begins to subside.

Miles lowers his mask, revealing an expression caught between concern and bewilderment. You glance at him, a mixture of guilt and anticipation in your eyes. The cityscape stretches before you, a silent witness to the tumultuous emotions swirling between you two.

"Why didn’t you just say that you knew me?" he finally asks, his voice softer now, devoid of the superhero edge.

You wince, your gaze dropping to the ground.  “I didn’t mean to…In my defence, imagine being on the receiving end of a superhero’s wrath.” 

“I wasn’t wrath…ful.” He denies it, his hand over his heart with an offended look. This draws a chuckle out of you, shaking your head. “But I get it. Imagine being forced to sign a contract with someone who knows your real identity.”

You rub your arm uncomfortably. “You must’ve had a hard time," you admit, finally looking at him. "I’m sorry."

The weight of the apology hangs in the air, mingling with the echoes of your impulsive fall. Miles's eyes, once reflecting surprise and worry, soften as he meets your gaze.

The words feel inadequate, unable to fully capture exactly how regretful you feel, but your eyes convey the sincerity of your apology. However, it's too late for one. In this moment of vulnerability between you both, the full weight of your actions finally hits you. 

Miles' expression tightens, and a heavy silence hangs between you. The consequences of your deception weigh on the air, leaving an unspoken tension that neither of you can escape. His eyes flicker with a mix of frustration and concern. 

He struggles to find the right words, his clenched fists telling you all you need to know as his eyes dart away. “You don't understand. If my identity is exposed, it's not just about me. It puts everyone I care about in danger. I've seen what happens to heroes when their secret is out. Not everyone has the privilege of being safe.”

The weight of Miles' revelation settles heavily on your shoulders, a stark reminder of the unintended consequences of your actions. You’re at a loss for words, only capable of falling silent and staring at your fidgeting hands that have begun to peel the skin of your thumb. “I won’t tell anyone,” you promise, though you’re not entirely sure of how much it’d even matter to him. “I know I’m not exactly trustworthy-” The corner of his lips quirked up in faint amusement at the irony, “but I promise, I’ll never, ever, ever reveal your identity.”

You look up at him, hoping that your sincerity is conveyed through your words. 

Finally, he releases a breathy chuckle, looking down at his mask, and back up at the glowing lights below. For a moment, the gaping distance between you lessens. He glances at you with an accepting smile. 

“Okay.”

As you both settle onto the rooftop, the city sprawled beneath you, a newfound calm envelops the space. The laughter from earlier echoes, but it carries a different note now – one of shared understanding and the promise of a fresh start.

“Hey,” You turn, an idea taking root in your mind. “You’re smart, right?”

“Some might say so,” He agrees playfully with a nod.

At his response, you go on your knees, clasping your hands together in a sudden attempt to beg him. “Tutor me.” You begin to explain before he can react. “I got this huge test coming up, and I won’t be allowed to participate in my school’s art exhibit if I don’t pass. You gotta help me, dude!”

“What?” He’s taken aback by your sudden request, raising a brow. “Why me?”

“Because!” You point accusingly at him, “You go to that smart and fancy school, don’t you? Nicole already told me about how you won that scholarship and everything. Plus, you’re even doing all this Spiderman stuff on the side. Your time management skills are so much better than mine will ever be. Aren’t you a superhero? Don’t you have, like, super study skills or something?”

“Super study skills?” He says drily, and you realise exactly how stupid your words sound. However, you shake your head stubbornly, sticking to whatever you’ve said. “Well, since you’re clearly in need of help, and like you said - I’m a superhero, right? Guess I gotta rescue yet another helpless citizen.”

You smile excitedly, delighted that he’s agreed before what he says finally sinks in. “Did you just call me helpless?”

“So, what’s the test on?” He asks, ignoring your pointed glare. 

“Math and Science.” You decide to let it go because he did just save you from a rather dreadful demise. 

He purses his lips slightly, weighing his options. “Sure,” He nods, “I’ll see what I can do.”

“Thank you, thank you! You won't regret it, I promise! I’ll even buy you tiramisu or whatever it is you wanna drink!” You exclaim happily, unable to stop yourself from hopping up and down from his agreement. 

He chuckles, readjusting his mask and shooting a web at the adjacent apartment building. “No problem. Just don’t tell anyone you have a superhero tutor, okay?”

“I solemnly swear.” You promise with a nod, watching him give you a two-fingered salute before gracefully swinging off, likely heading back home. You make your way back too, humming happily at the thought of future study sessions with your newfound superhero tutor and friend.

— — — — — 

As he enters his room after another day of swinging through the day as Brooklyn's one and only Spiderman, he tosses aside his mask and discards his suit. Another day, another citizen saved, as is the usual routine. Before he jumps into his bed, he pauses. 

He grabs his water bottle and pours some water onto the potted plant sitting on the windowsill, fingertips brushing against the delicate leaves that rustle with the breeze.

[the-ninja-legacy-whip]

*slams table*

DETAILS. NOW.

pls?

Well thank you for the excuse to dump my brainrot–

This is (a very quick sketch of) Cam. She is Jesse and Cole's daughter. She is the next Elemental Master of Surprise.

...wait, what?

Sometime Post-Legacy!Crystalized, the world is finally free of the influence of the Overlord, meaning that there's finally time for the Ninja for themselves. They all still live at the Monastery together, and train to remain vigilant for the next threat, but eradicating the most prominent source of all evil in the Realm kinda takes the sails out of anyone/anything else, so y'know. Things are calm. For now.

And Cole, now happily married to the "most perfect, most prettiest, most pizazziest, most pinkest person ever" (his words, not mine, and definitely not Jesse's), kind of longs for a kid. We already know he's got the killer dad instinct, is great with children, yadda yadda, it was all only a matter of time. Jesse knew this too, but is terrified of being a parent (although taking care of Miranda + his own inherent paranoia about things has made him rather attentive, if not a touch over-protective). And if Cole's with him, then...maybe it's doable.

So they try to adopt.

("There's so many orphans, Jess. So many orphans. Maybe we could just—" "We are NOT adopting them all." "But the guilt of leaving them all behiiiiiind..." "...oh no the guilt." "How are we both like this??")

("Just pick the cutest one, duh! Or the most talented! And stay away from the mean ones!" "We're choosing a CHILD here, Mira, not a damn pet!" "Can we get a baby though? I kinda want the baby experience." "...and now Cole sounds like he's shopping at a grocery store." "HEY.")

("Are we still going to that meeting today?" "Shoot, I forgot, I've got a show in West Haven tomorrow; I have to leave tonight! What about Friday?" "Can't, that's the day me and the boys are investigating a potential sting operation." "UWAAAAH HOW ARE WE THIS BUSY?!")

...so, uh, that kinda doesn't go well.

("...if we had a kid of our own, what do you think they'd be like?" "...Cole I think we're kinda lacking in the equipment for that—" "Humor me, Jess." "Well, uh, they'd obviously inherit your powers, so probably very strong, and brave, and would love music and art and can't really cook–" "...is there any of you in this theoretical child or are we just making a lackluster clone of me?" "...they could have my smile?" "Jess.")

("Too bad we can't just work a miracle, huh?" "..." "...Jesse?")

("...but what if we could?")

So three to four existential crises and one very heart-wrenching discussion later, Jesse uses Miracle Make to manifest their kid, sacrifices his powers (thinking they've hit a point where he's not really in need of them anymore anyway), and boom, they're parents of a beautiful baby girl now. Whee!

...except with Jesse sacrificing his powers in the very same instance that Camellia Brooke Marvell is born, she becomes "the most unsuspecting individual" at the time, and winds up inheriting the Element of Surprise. Uh, Surprise?

That little unexpected snag-or-maybe-not-a-snag aside, things are great! Cole was destined to raise this child and is utterly crushing it, while Jesse becomes okay with being powerless and a parent and gets excited at the prospect of teaching his daughter all his old tricks. Jesse's still not big on cutesy nicknames, but will call Cam 'our little miracle' or 'sweetpea' from time to time...while Cole calls her a list of fluffy nicknames but his favorite is "my little lily".

Cam calls Cole 'Papa' and Jesse 'Daddy', and while she's got Jesse's habit of catching people off-guard (i.e. seemingly disappearing and reappearing from sight, giving both of them heart-attacks at least once a day) and is also scared really easily herself. So loud sounds are a definite no around her, especially during nap-time (looking at you, Jay).

Jesse's family goes ham on making sure she's well-fed and "getting a well-rounded palate" while Miranda, a high-ranking member of Borg Industries' staff now, becomes the favorite "rich aunt with no kids" that spoils Cam.

("Happy First Birthday to my favorite niece...! Just a little something-something ;) " "MIRA DID YOU BUY MY DAUGHTER A PONY?!" "Nooooo! ....it's a unicorn!" "YOU TAPED A PARTY HAT TO ITS FOREHEAD?!" "Oh stop whining! Look she loves it!" "I'M NOT RAISING A HORSE!" "Calm DOWN I just rented it for a week!" "A WHOLE WEEK?!")

Grandpa Lou also spoils his granddaughter rotten, and very unsubtly tries to encourage her interest in the performing arts.

("Oh, look at how adorable she is in this tutu! I'll have to get express shipping on some ballet shoes for her—" "...Dad you are not about to make a dancer out of my daughter." "But what if she likes it?! We have to find out early! What if she's a born-performer like her daddy? Look, she's pirouetting around already!" "You swinging her around in the air is NOT dancing, Dad...!")

Either way, it's as delightfully chaotic as you'd hope raising a child to be, and Cole, Jesse, and Cam are blissfully happy just as they are.

Cam is only two when The Merge strikes.

. . .

Cam is seven going on eight when "the dragons began to rise", and rumors of the old Ninja Team along with a brand new one begin surfacing. She asks her daddy constantly if that means Papa is coming back, but he never gives her a direct answer. Daddy doesn't like to talk about Papa; only once bitterly mentioned that 'Papa went to fight The Merge when it first appeared' and...then never came home.

Cam doesn't remember a time when The Merge did not exist.

And now her daddy spends the days looking to the skies, waiting for another rift. Aunt Mira has their appearances above the remains of Ninjago City timed almost-perfectly now, and when another is set to strike, Daddy quickly pulls out his old weapon. The crystals it is adorned with have faded back to their natural blue. He curses, and regretfully turns back to his daughter.

("Are you gonna do your magic again, Daddy?" "...something like that, yes." "Yay! I like when you do magic!")

So Cam taps the crystals, feels a small portion of her own power seep into them (despite the lack of her own potential), and watches them change from blue to a brilliant pink. Her daddy thanks her quickly, then swings the wand out, shifting it into a naginata with a single wave. Cam gasps in awe, admiring as her daddy's eyes temporarily glow, and launches himself towards the sky, sealing up the rift with the strongest blast of "surprise" he can manage, even despite the meager amount. He doesn't want to siphon too much power from his daughter, but this isn't going to be enough–!

Suddenly the sky erupts in green and gold—Cam winces at the bright light, but the rift is sealed in an instant. Daddy returns back to the ground with a stunned flourish and sparkles, standing protectively before Cam, as the legendary Green Ninja appears as if from nowhere, eyes shimmering with complication.

But, he addresses her daddy like the old friend that he is.

"Hey, Jess. There's...something I have to show you."

. . .

They're whisked to the Monastery in a near-heartbeat, Uncle Lloyd guiding them up those almost-familiar steps and into a definitely unfamiliar courtyard with equally unfamiliar people. There's a beautiful golden fountain with a dragon and waterlilies that Cam immediately scrambles over to splash around in, if Jesse hadn't scooped her into his arms beforehand.

He and Lloyd have been speaking in very careful, very hushed whispers since arriving, and Cam desperately wants to know what the big dramatic secret is, if it's got nothing to do with Aunt Nya working with the cat-girl on a mech, or the dragon-girl gnawing on Uncle Kai's arm. Lloyd walks pass them all, leading them to the back gardens of the place.

Jesse stops as soon as he sets foot onto the cobblestone path. Lloyd bites his lip, and, as ever, quickly ejects himself from the impeding potentially awkward and/or emotionally charged conversation.

Cam peeks over Jesse's shoulder, watching as a large man in black and orange paces frantically back and forth across the garden, muttering aimlessly to himself and unable to keep himself calm. Jesse curses Lloyd's name under his breath—the other man picks up on the sound, marigold eyes instantly connecting with Jesse's.

"...Jess—" Jesse immediately takes a defensive step back. The other man's voice turns devastated. "J-Jesse, please, you have to hear me out. Just that, nothing else—!"

"...What's there to hear out?" Jesse's words are clipped as he clings tighter to Cam on his back. Cam shrinks under the thinly-veiled fury. "That you, once again, chose to do something reckless and endanger yourself when I begged you not to? That you, once again, left me to think you were dead? That's not something that should be a reoccurring pattern, Cole!"

Cam perks up at the mention of 'Cole'—that's her papa's name! Excited, she starts fidgeting, but Jesse keeps her still. She pouts; he gently quiets her down before redirecting his fury back at Cole.

"...and worst of all, you left me to raise our daughter without you! She...she doesn't even remember you, Cole!" Cole physically buckles at that revelation. "And now you're just gonna pop back up five years later like nothing's wrong?! And you dragged Lloyd into this–?!"

"In Lloyd's defense, he is a little familiar with growing up without a father that would have wanted to be in his life otherwise." Cole tenses, eyes glowing with despair. "So I knew at least he would have understood from the get-go."

That breaks Jesse a bit, giving Cole the opportunity to close the distance between them, just a bit.

"...Jesse, you know that this is the very last thing I wanted to happen." Cole speaks slowly, lest he break down crying otherwise. "And if I didn't help when I did, things could've ended up a whole lot worse. I've spent every single second since trying to navigate this new, crazy, giant, mixed up world to get back to you. And the thought of seeing you, Cam, and everyone again is the only thing that's kept me going."

"...I know." Cam's never heard her daddy sound so broken before. "But the fact that you've done this to me so many times and I know it's never really your fault and yet it still hurts! I'm allowed to be mad at the circumstances!"

"You are," Cole agrees, and Jesse's lip starts to tremble. "And I'm so, so, so sorry."

Things go quiet between the two, with half a decade's worth of more conversation to catch up on, and yet neither being sure of what move to make next. Cole, however, can't help but peek around at the little girl staring curiously right back at him. His heart clenches.

"I-Is...that her? She's...she's gotten so tall..."

Jesse nods, and, after thinking on it a moment, places Cam on the ground and encourages her to introduce herself.

"...I'll let her decide, then." Jesse clarifies, watching as Cole's heart now jumps into his throat. Cole's breathing goes still as Cam looks back with fuchsia eyes full of potential. She trots up to him; Cole crouches down on instinct, lowering himself to her level.

"...hi," he says, holding himself back from being an overly emotional as he'd like. The last thing he wants is a bad first impression. "I—um...it's nice to meet you. You're Camellia, yes?"

Cam nods. Cole smiles, though it trembles.

"Do you...know who I am?"

Cam puts a hand to her chin, wondering if she should voice her hopes. She glances back at Jesse; Jesse gives her an encouraging nod. Thus, she returns Cole's question with another.

"Are you...my Papa?"

Cole nods, curling his hands into fists to ground himself.

"I am, but...only if you'll have me."

Like a light switch, Cam plows into Cole's arms; Cole springs back up, hugging her with all the strength he's got (without snapping her tiny self in half, of course).

"PAPA!"

"MY BABYYYYYY!!!!"

They laugh and cry and Cole can't contain himself as he whispers apologies and promises and a thousand questions into her ear that Cam swears they have all the time in the world to get around to.

Jesse watches them, a little overwhelmed by the sight, until Cole swings in front of him, freeing up a hand to hold out to Jesse. He smiles warmly, in the way that Jesse's missed for so, so long.

"Hey, I missed you too, y'know."

And then of course that's when Jesse starts crying and throws himself into Cole's arms too, the trio hugging as a family for the first time in forever...and then Cam gets to bear witness to her parents having a long overdue kissing session (read: ew).

But then again, she doesn't remember time when Jesse was this happy, either. So she'll let them have the moment.

. . .

Cam then begs to be a ninja and "join the cause" but while both parents at least allow her to train (as they both wished they'd been in the know about their powers when they were younger), she's not allowed on any dangerous missions until she's older (or at least, gets her True Potential). In the meantime, Miranda hooks her up with a bunch of video equipment to become something of an internet idol to "bring the people of all realms together" (as to Cole's somewhat horror, Cam indeed has the blood of a performer and has Jesse's ability to sing). It takes some getting used to (and a lot of hugs and probably therapy to comfort Cole on the fact that he missed five years of his kid's life), but...eventually, things do return to a state of normal.

(...And then maybe down the line they actually do adopt this time, and Cole gets to be around for it this time, and Cam's little brother willingly becomes the next Master of Earth once he's ready)

[bonesandthebees]

I am loving the Qsmp PTA AU. For all of the parents, what are each of their favorite and least favorite chores?

oooo we are at peak surburban parenting with this question

quackity's least favorite chore tends to be taking tilin to appointments or extracurriculars or playdates. of course he doesn't want tilin to be locked up in the house all the time, but he's just so busy with other stuff that driving tilin around really cuts into his time and he doesn't count it as spending time with tilin either since he's just driving them places. he'd rather actually go hang out with his kid at like a movie theater or make dinner together or something, but then he has to take tilin for a checkup and that takes the whole afternoon and suddenly it's nighttime and there's just not enough hours in the day. he has a carpool set up with roier and jaiden.

mariana genuinely sucks at babysitting. charlie isn't great either, but mariana would much rather be around juanaflippa with at least one other parent around to help him out. he always loses sight of her at the worst possible moments and it gives him a heart attack every time. charlie meanwhile tells people that family dinners are a chore because that's when he has to spend the most time with his "bitch wife". this isn't exactly true he doesn't hate mariana that much but he's very dramatic about their marital problems. also the entire process of making dinner, and any meals really, for juanaflippa is a headache because of how many allergies she has. of course charlie doesn't mind this his little girl needs to eat, but damn it would be easier if he could just give her a pb & j.

spreen has the energy of a guy who would pass out trying to change a diaper. I have not watched enough of him to know if this is true but it's the vibes i get.

while foolish doesn't dislike socializing he really isn't a fan of all the social events the pta puts on that you have to go to all the time (this definitely has nothing to do with the fact that bad shows up to every single one of these. nope no way not related at all). he'd much rather stay at home sketching out more blueprints (I think he's an architect in this au) or exploring the city with leonarda. vegetta doesn't mind and happily goes to events like these on his own (it's a wonder people still think foolish is the flirt). but vegetta hates home repairs like if the sink busts or something so foolish takes care of that stuff for the family.

jaiden doesn't mind cleaning chores because those give her time to clear her head and she enjoys spending time with the kids so she doesn't mind babysitting either, but cooking is where she fails. girl has burnt water before. she's not allowed near the stove in the house so roier does most of the cooking. meanwhile roier hates doing dishes so it works out for them both.

phil can't stand things that keep him tied up at home for long periods of time. like a full day of house cleaning? nope get him out of there the man needs fresh air at least for a few hours every day. missa dislikes grocery shopping because he can never find what he's looking for or he never brings enough reusable bags or he forgets something- phil does the grocery shopping for them lmao

wilbur has a whole list of mundane chores he absolutely sucks at because he's used to living on the road and keeps forgetting the things you have to do when you're settled in one place for a while. like missa, wilbur also hates grocery shopping. but unlike missa wilbur just uses the wonders of instacart and gets a lot of their groceries delivered to the house. he also sucks at putting laundry away. he's used to keeping his clothes shoved inside a small suitcase you think he's gonna know how to hang stuff or fold it? no he does not. he makes an effort to hang up tallulah's skirts and dresses so she doesn't show up to school in wrinkled clothes, but his own outfits are a mess. at least they're clean. and he also sucks at cooking but like his solution for grocery shopping, he has a dashpass for doordash so he and tallulah eat take out at least 3 nights a week.

bad is like the 50s housewife stereotype except he's a single parent. he cooks he cleans he bakes—he does it all! except vacuuming. on god this man hates vacuuming. I have no explanation for this except I hate vacuuming and I couldn't think of anything else for him

[vodika-vibes]

Vodikaaaaaaa my loveeeeeee ✨️

I saw those kiss prompts, and I just had to pop into your inbox for a request! There were so many good ones to choose from, but I am feeling soft, sappy, and fluffy today

Soooo, what about prompt, "a kiss against the cheek after discovering the other is napping" with Keeli 🥺

Please and thank you 💚

@the-bad-batch-baroness

Napping Kisses

Summary: You get home from a shopping trip, and have to go and hunt your boyfriend down.

Pairing: Captain Keeli x Reader

Word Count: 915

Warnings: Fluff

A/N: I've never written for Keeli before, so I hope this is okay. But more importantly, I hope this has the soft vibes you're seeking. Also, I wrote this in under an hour, so go me?

divider by saradika

When you get home from grocery shopping you’re surprised that the house is dark, and quiet. 

Generally speaking, when Keeli is here, and when he’s staying with you, and he didn’t go out with you for some reason, you’ll come home and there will be music playing, or something playing on the holo, or you’ll be able to hear him puttering around the kitchen.

His boots are still at the door…as are the more comfortable sneakers that you bought him when he started spending more time with you and less time at the barracks. Which means he hasn’t gone out. You didn’t really think so, honestly, he would have sent a message if he had gotten called in suddenly.

You walk into the kitchen and set the bags on the counter. You absently shove the perishable items where they belong, and then ignore the rest of the groceries in favor of finding your favorite person.

You start in the bedroom.

He’s not in bed, though you’d have been surprised if he was. He doesn’t like lounging in bed when you’re not there next to him. He’s also not in the shower, the door is open and his towel is in the laundry basket alongside his sleep pants from the night before.

You hum thoughtfully, grab the basket, and bring it to the laundry room. Though you just drop the basket on top of the dryer, and then continue your search.

You open the door to your craft room, and…nope. He’s not there either. Though you do see that some of his paints are out, and some of the brushes are laying out drying. 

You tap the door frame thoughtfully, your eyes scanning the room. His paints are out, and his brushes are drying, but there’s no canvas on the easel …which means he can only be outside.

You step out of the craft room and pull the door shut behind you, and then you walk through the house and pull open the door that leads to the backyard.

Keeli’s canvas is lying in the sun, drying, but you still don’t see him. You glance at the painting and a fond smile crosses your face when you see that it’s a picture of the pair of you sitting out in the garden.

Keeli really is a very talented painter, though you know that if you say that to him, he’ll just deflect with a joke. You have an entire closet filled with paintings and sketches he’s done…you’re just waiting until he says it’s alright before you hang them.

But admiring your very talented boyfriend's paintings isn’t helping you find him any faster. So you spin on you heel and you scan your garden. He’s not tending to the vegetable garden, nor the herb garden, none of the plants are tall enough to hide him from you as of yet…

You think for a moment, and then you smile. You know where he is.

You cross through your garden, and walk the short distance over to the small orchard that your grandfather planted for you when you first bought the house. 

You wander between the trees and there, near the end of a row of trees, laying in the shade under a tree, is Keeli. His arms are tucked under his head, and one of his knees is bent, and, as you approach him, you realize that he’s asleep.

A broad smile crosses your face, and you walk over to him and carefully sit on the ground next to him. You lean your head back against the tree behind you and just enjoy the quiet for a moment.

Your brave, handsome Keeli works so hard. He deserves a break.

You open your eyes and quietly lean down and press a gentle, lingering, kiss against his cheek. You’ll let him sleep, he deserves it.

You place your hands on the ground, to help yourself to your feet, but a quiet hum distracts you, “Leaving so soon, cyare?” Keeli asks, his voice thick with sleep.

You laugh quietly and settle yourself more comfortably on the ground, your hand coming up to lightly run across his head, “I didn’t mean to wake you, love.” You reply warmly.

His eyes open and he regards with a warm smile, “It’s alright. Welcome home.” Keeli’s arm snakes out and hooks around your waist, and he tugs so that you topple across his chest.

You laugh softly and adjust yourself so that you're lying more comfortably on top of him, “Mm, this is quite the welcome,” you joke easily, “Did you have a nice nap?”

“Hm…I think so. But it would have been better with you.” Keeli replies, as he cups your face.

You lean into his touch, “You’re such a sap, Keeli.” You say lovingly.

“Only for you, cyare. And my brother’s will never believe you.”

“They don’t need to know this side of you,” You agree, “I’ll be greedy and keep it all to myself.”

“Mm. Greedy over me.” Keeli says thoughtfully, “I like it. Very hot.”

“You would say that.” You reply with a sigh.

He flashes a small grin, and uses his hand to tilt your head towards his, “Love you, cyare.” He murmurs as he pulls you so your lips are hovering just over his.

“Love you more, you ridiculous man,” You answer with a grin, before you close the distance between your lips.

You have Keeli, and he has you, and nothing else matters at the moment.

[xinambercladx]

An Arm to Hang Onto - Ficlet

"Hello there, Darlin'." Yeeeees! EDIT: I added an illustration. <3 <3 <3 HE LOOKS SO GODDAMN HAPPY. I finished sketching it, and kept going, just gonna fully ink and color this bad boy. This f***ing happy bad boy. ------------------------- Last week I dreamed about Cad Bane again. It was short, sweet, and made me swoon (hitting my pillow again right when I woke up). You can also read on AO3. <- link Fluff Rated: G. Words: 1000-ish

----------------------------------------- There was a little planet in the middle of no-where space. I wandered the streets of a small town with brick buildings. One could mistake it for Ferrix, when looking at the red bricked buildings and hard laborers wearing overalls and hard hats returning from work. However, this wasn't a shipbreaking town. There were no auditory nuisances of heavy machinery or noxious odors of fuel and hot metal. Instead, the streets where bricked too, and the rains washed away the grime and refuse down efficient drains. Walking to and fro was only a chore because no vehicles were allowed. Strangely, the locals didn't seem to mind.

I carried a few bags with me. They began empty, but on this errand I intended to fill them. I was relatively new here, but I was beginning to learn the names of the shop keepers. The farmer's market filled one bag with fresh produce and eggs. Another bag was for new lights for one that puttered out the day before. I didn't wish to suffer a dark kitchen.

There were not-so-quiet whispers. I could hear them whenever I left. They wondered why I was alone. They wondered why a woman like me didn't have a man to cling to? Surely she's married.

Perhaps she's a widow?

Perhaps she's not interested in any of the men here?

What's wrong with our men?

How could she not be interested in a muscular minor or sun tanned farmer? For some reason they never asked me directly. For some reason, I didn't mind. Honestly, I accuse my unconscious mind stealing Belle's intro in Beauty and the Beast. Thankfully, there was no musical number. The buildings were far from french countryside looking.

Oh, did I mention it was definitely Star Wars? Sure, half of the people there were human, but there were many aliens there too. I remember three specifically: Mon Calimari, an orange skinned alien with funny fingers, and those skittish, blue skinned aliens called Mythrol. Not sure why I dreamed about two water dwelling races, since I don't remember lots of water in the dream. There was no coastline, just the town. I remember droids being around, but can't remember exactly which ones. My home was in a corner between streets, with one wall shared with the bakery. Or was it a café? My unconscious mind didn't quite decide. The place was quiet now, soon to be closing since the afternoon rarely saw customers looking for the day's bread or kaff. A bell rang as someone left the bakery and he tipped his helmet at me. I gave a polite nod back and went to my door. I pushed it open with my hip. The doors of peoples homes were never locked here. It was a safe little town in the middle of no-where space. I placed one bag down on the mudroom shelf with a sigh. I was glad the errand was done. The bags were heavier than I liked. I kicked off my shoes and I brought the grocery bag to the dark kitchen. There was light coming through the window, but the cloudy day only allowed so much. I flipped the switch but the light failed. I had forgotten it was broken. "Hello there, darlin'," greeted a familiar and welcoming voice. I turned and saw a man step into the light and look at me with adoring, crimson eyes. I practically leapt into Cad Bane's arms. "You're back!"

He chuckled and gently pulled me off to get a better look. I don't remember much else of what we said. Dreams aren't always clear. I remember the impression of what was said though. He spoke about work, how the job went down. I'm guessing it was faster than Bane had though it would be. He brought me a few supplies, something I couldn't get on this planet. He mentioned the light being out. I gave him the replacement I bought earlier and he was able to fix it with those long arms, saving me the trouble. With that done, he offered his arm and escorted me back out of the house. He let me hold onto his arm. I was blushing like crazy but happier than ever. The day had been a good day, but now it was a perfect day. The eyes of the townsfolk couldn't quite believe what they saw. The docile Human woman hanging on the arm of a dangerous looking Duros. It was an odd pairing. I couldn't tell if they knew who he was. His broad hat and height near engulfed me in his shadow, but the bright smile on my face balanced us out.

Really? That's who she chooses? I could hear them whisper.

He's a Duros. Of course he'd be gone all the time, space travelers they are. That seemed explained why I lived alone. Yes, he was gone all the time. But today he was here and walking side by side with me. -------------------------------------------- I was over the moon for like three days after this dream. He called me "Darlin'???" Well, now I know what to use in future fics for his S/O. Excuse me while I swoon again.

[rianafying]

hello diary i’m back idk what is happening or why i ever feel what i feel, but here goes nothing

i’ve been feeling very creative today, had a terrible morning woke up insanely dehydrated, could barely move, my arthritis and psoriasis had flared up as well, i had to cancel my gig but they’re fine, they had other people on board. i don’t really feel like i missed out because i literally couldn’t have gone and needed to stay home and rehydrate, plus it’s like 37 degrees outside, i’ll stay home thanks. anyway, so i got some much needed rest and i ate and drank loads of water and i feel replenished now and i feel hopeful and creative and i wish i could’ve just started something, a project or whatever. but i have no many chores standing firmly between me and what i actually want to do. will is a terribly difficult thing to conjure. i had a telehealth appointment to get diagnosed w adhd in melbourne so i can access the necessary treatment, but they’re telling me it’ll be at least $800 and at least 4 sessions to just get diagnosed. and that to me is a huge undertaking. i told them ill think about it but what is there to think of, i know fully well i cant afford it. i wish i had an ipad to draw on. ive been wanting to draw something for ages and i could draw on my physical sketch book but i just haven’t? i just cant? its the guilt from all the chores i haven’t done. there’s a proper inspection due in 4 days and i just know it’s going to cripple me with anxiety as the date comes closer. there’s so much stuff that i want to do. and yet i do nothing. i’m not doing even 1% of everything i want to do, because im stuck doing 100% of the things i hate but have to do. when im older, i hope i get permanent residency in australia or any other first world country, i wish i have a safe and permanent place to live, regardless of size or quality. i wish i have someone who can help me with the tasks i struggle with and i can help them with tasks they struggle with and if we both struggle at the same things, we’ll understand each other, we can struggle and learn together. hopefully this will not be a romantic partner because i don’t think my brain is hardwired to deal with matters of the heart in a stable way. i hope that by the time i feel safe, the children of gaza feel safe too. i hope we win. i thought of them when i got dehydrated and worried that ill get a uti, i thought about how much worse they have it. i think of them all the time but especially when im suffering and im reminded that they have it many folds worse. i try to derive hope, strength, and gratitude from that instead of helplessness, and powerlessness.

i haven’t been able to take out the trash and get rid of my dead plants and they’re starting to attract bugs and i really need to do that today, i’ve been saying that everyday, it’ll just take seconds. i also am very close to having $0 in my account because i had to buy some meds and i found some vitamins for half price and decided to buy a whole buttload of them #forhealthiguess also its SO HOT. and im trying to avoid turning on my air conditioner because my electricity bill last month was $140??? like why? it’s a crazy world out here. crazy expensive. for the millionth time, i really should get a real job soon. or try to. i doubt i’ll ever have enough to be independent. i fear i’ll always be at the mercy of my parents. i fear i’ll heal too slow to keep up with the damage.

all day i did nothing. that’s not true, i went grocery shopping and i made meatballs, and spaghetti and it turned out great. the one thing i always cook successfully is any kind of pasta, never fails. i feel 50% guilty for not doing anything important today. such as taking out the trash, cleaning my room, etc. it’s the one thing i hate doing: house chores. makes me wanna scream, cry and throw up. i made a mistake, last night i accidentally left my earphones on the couch at reception downstairs and hadn’t even realised until earlier today when i was leaving the building and saw it on the couch. i feel so relieved that i live in a place where nobody stole it all day. part of me feels like i don’t deserve to live so well. because for nearly a year, i have been living wonderfully, everything’s going so well, and all my demons are inside of my own head. this is new for me. there’s no actual threat, i think. still feels like there is. i’m less overwhelmed than usual, but still pretty overwhelmed. there’s always too many ideas and not enough ability to implement them. how do i feel chaos and clarity simultaneously. i just need a break from this mental torment. i think getting my apartment clean will definitely help with that. but it’s such a big task, even thinking about it makes me fall to my bed and start to rot. suddenly i find that my body won’t move. adhd sounds like it’s so quirky and funny until you’re surrounded with piles of garbage and flying insects and there is a mysterious sticky brown patch underneath the fridge that just will not move. until there’s no space to walk from one end of the room to the other without stepping on and crushing things underneath my feet. it feels as if my brain has acquired an endless supply of shame and guilt. i will probably not feel focused until my room is actually clean. clean enough to be inspected. clean enough to maybe even have visitors. i get anxious just thinking about the prospect.

[nickgerlich]

Fall Into The Mall

The enclosed shopping mall has long been a fixture in American society, one that has been copied the world over. Based on the ancient Greek idea of an agora or marketplace but with a roof, and removed from center city in most cases, it was designed to serve the needs of an increasingly car-centric suburban society.

Austrian Victor Gruen was the architect of the first enclosed mall in the US, the Southdale Center in Edina Minnesota. Ironically, he came to loathe his contributions to both architecture and commerce, his left-leaning politics showing through. Americans took to them mightily, with new malls being built throughout the countryside well into the 1980s, when we reached saturation. So popular were malls that they became sub-texts in numerous movies and television sketches, even to recent years.

Having grown up in Chicago’s south suburbs, there was no shortage of shopping mall opportunities. All we had to do was decide which direction we wanted to go, or specific stores to patronize. Unfortunately, not all malls enjoyed this glorious period, though, such as the Dixie Square Mall in Harvey Illinois, my hometown in the 1960s.

Dixie Square succumbed to racial strife, unsafe conditions, crime, and more. It opened in 1966, but closed in 1978. It was then leased to a Hollywood studio to film a scene in the Blues Brothers movie. I was fortunate to do some UrbEx in 2010, photographing the overgrown mess extensively. It was finally demolished in 2012. My parents had gotten the hell out of Dodge in 1971, escaping to a much safer suburb.

The demise of Dixie Square made it one of the first—if not the first—Dead Mall, a category that would grow significantly in the 21st century. E-commerce changed the way we shop, and the abundance of malls suddenly became an albatross. At peak in the 1980s, there were about 2500 malls; there are roughly 700 remaining today. Some analysts suggest there may be as few as 150 left in a decade.

Then along comes news that the mall is not dead just yet, a new twist on a Monty Python skit. Both foot traffic and revenues are up in the remaining malls. Occupancy rates are nearing pre-pandemic levels.

But…and this is a big but…this does not mean that malls are poised for a resurgence in number. I suspect what has happened is a right-sizing, that 700 is what we really needed all along for the long haul. Furthermore, pent-up shopping desires caused by the pandemic may also be playing out, in spite of inflation.

In other words, don’t get too excited just yet.

E-commerce has been growing steadily ever since Jeff Bezos flipped the switch on Amazon in July 1995, and enjoyed a wild ride during COVID. But it will never overtake brick-and-mortar (BAM) retail, for a variety of reasons. By and large, many people still like to shop, wanting to inspect or try on products, enjoying the social aspect, and craving the instant gratification that comes with taking home your purchases.

While there is wide variation in the estimates of e-commerce’s footprint, most center around 15% at the moment, with a seasonal peak during the winter holidays. I suspect this number is low, though, by not accounting for items that may fall through the cracks, like hotel reservations made via an app (as well as airplane tickets and rental cars), DoorDash orders, and grocery curbside pickup or delivery. Face it, we use our devices in many ways now to place orders for many things, not just books and various sundry items from Amazon.

What we as a society does with the Dead Malls is up in the air. Some are demolished, while others are repurposed into warehouses, offices, and even condos. Just know that when you begin to see the mix of tenants at your local mall start to shift into services, like gymnasiums, entertainment centers, and other non-retail businesses, you are witnessing a slow, inexorable death.

I am happy for the current malls achieving success. These are the survivors, the remnant few once you consider how many malls there once were. And if you ever do see a new mall being built, pause long enough to take pictures. You are witnessing a true oddity.

Here’s to the shopping mall, that place I once hung out at as a teenager. I haven’t been to Amarillo’s Westgate Mall since last December, and I am betting that I won’t return until this December. I will pick up the things I just can’t buy easily at Amazon. And here’s to Victor Gruen. May he RIP, even though he lived to regret his influence on America. You can’t blame him too much, though. He was just following the people.

Dr “Point And Click” Gerlich

Audio Blog

[fakeloveaskblog]

Hi, me again. Awwwwww! Even amongst all the angst Janus and Remy still manage to be adorably cute. Also I’m not sure of a question to ask them so I’ll just watch them silently incase they need anything. (And because I’m nosy and want to know what happens next.)

Glow Eyes

"Girl am I like losing it or has that vitiligo patch like moved..??"

Remy and Janus were laying tangled up together in the bath. The mirror had been covered in steam from how warm they had the water. The enby was mindlessly looking at their partner's (!) hand while leaning against his chest.

"Possibly. I don't keep count of my patches" Janus raised their eyebrow "My darling, why have you kept check on it"

"Well girlie you see-" Remy let out a string of incomprehensible blubbering while their cheeks turned pink.

"Ah I understand now. Very logical" They snarked back to which Remy lightly smacked their shoulder.

Remy stretched their arms like an old cat and about 5000 bones in their body instantly made such intense cracking noises it sounded like an avalanche made of bones.

"Feeling any better now after the bath?" Janus asked.

"Think so. I mean like my stomach still feels like toooots fucked up but I'm feeling less like blegh y'know. More like present I guess"

He pressed a kiss to their boney shoulder, right by a bruise that had been left after a bitemark "I'm glad then"

--

Later on in the evening the twins worked together to make dinner. Remus got to hack everything up with a sharp knife while laughing maniacally and Rowan got to pretend like she was being controlled by a magical rat.

Remy tried their best to at least get some of the noddles the twins had fixed for them down but the food came up just a few minutes later. They stuck to just sipping juice with a spoon for the rest of the night.

The evening air was still warm when Rowan left to catch a flight to some french movie screening she was going to in the morning. The apartment lulled into a quiet piece as Janus read and Remus sketched down whatever outfit Remy told him to draw.

The notification sound rang out from Janus' phone and a relaxed grin spread over their lips as they read the messages "Logan is asking me to go grocery shopping with him. Should I tell him I plan on staying over at his place or do the two of you prefer if I come back here?"

"Depends girlie. Do you want to leave us long enough to give us time to like tots destroy your whole apartment like some coked up rockstars" Remy joked back.

"Or give me enough time to steal your Remington" Remus added while jokingly flexing his muscles.

"You are going to have to avoid my booby traps to do either of those things so I believe I can leave"

"Hehe boob"

"Why're you like looking so excited to like go buying shit with the Logie guy" Remy fake gasped while nudging Remus "You think grocery shopping is a codeword for some freaky shit?"

"Cannibalism!?" Remus exclaimed "OR! Illegal Graffiting!!"

"I am simply looking forward to spending time with my boyfriend. And darling Remy once you are feeling good enough to leave the apartment again I am sure I will get just as excited to go grocery shopping with you"

Janus leant in for a kiss but hesitated and was about to ask if he could kiss them. But before he could ask Remy had already smooshed his cheeks together with their hands and kissed him right on the lips.

As soon as he had left Remus casually moved his arm around Remy's shoulders "So are they good at it?"

"What? At kissing?"

Remus raised their eyebrows while nodding.

"Fucking great girlie!"

"Hell yeah!"

The two of them high fived.

"Wanna watch a horror movie-"

"Girl. Bestie. Sweetie. You've already showed me like 6 million. How many horror flicks can there be"

"I wasn't finished. Wanna watch a horror movie...with bimbos in it?"

"You got me!"

Remus cuddled up close to them before moving a blanket around them. Ms. Carl slithered up to the coach and made her long body comfortable over their laps as they watched the movie.

By now Remus knew how much gore Remy could take so he had tried to find a more spooky and less gory film. When he knew it would probably get too bad for them he simply moved his arm around them and let them press their face against the crook of his neck until the scene was over.

While they were watching the characters running around a bunch of dark hallways Remy lightly bonked their head against their crush's shoulder to get his attention.

"You ever been thinking of like transitioning in like other ways than socially" They asked, a bit unsure of their words "'Cause I've been like talking with Janie about me maybe like wanting to like I dunno go on a smaller dose of hormones"

Remus fully turned towards them. He had instantly forgotten about the film "You do?"

"Mhm"

"And Jan's been saying?"

"Ah he's all like chill 'bout it"

At almost the exact same time both of them let up into a half forced laugh before saying "My ex wasn't!"

They looked at each other before falling into genuine laughter. Remus steadied his hand against their wrist while continuing to talk.

"I have been thinking about it. I think I would wanna do a full dose though"

"The waiting lists tho. Girl they're-"

"Fucking rough. Like being ass fucked with a cactus"

"Yeah...."

The two of them sat back and sighed. Remus rolled his thumbs for a bit before shining up and slowly turning his head to one of the dark corners of the room.

"You don't think the like supernatural weirdos could magic up some hormones?" He asked with a toothy grin.

"Bestie. You're a genius! Tho I don't think I wanna take it with like a syringe. I think E comes in pills as well"

"Hehe and I will be committing illegal testosteron crimes hehe" Remus rubbed his hands together like a sleazy villain.

"Okay but like girlie even if we like get it from the creatures we should still like check in with like a doc first 'cause I don't want my super macho bestie bro to like suddenly die from too much macho y'know?"

"Good point beanie. Good point..." He thought for a bit "Didn't Logie get a doctor's degree in college?"

"I dunno. Jannie's the one who knows him mouth inside and out"

"I think so! I was gonna go check out spiders with him next week for one of my installation ideas anyway! You could come along so we can ask him about it?"

Remy leant against his side "I like that idea"

"Great! I think there's spiders at both the zoo and aquarium so which one you'd think be better?"

"Uh-uh bestie. I'm no good at doing decision. Let the flying magic dudes make that decision"

[catch-the-wind]

when reader is sick hc's

finally posting writing here so true

n e ways okay so i’m brainrotting about the genshin charas taking care of their s/o’s when they’re sick 🥺 and now i'm feeling sick, sigh

ohm and sulien ambros belong to @teyvattherapist! they're such good chara's, i know i'm writing them here but i deffo recommend reading up on them

okay here u go, have some hc's that are kinda sorta long and by that i mean 2.5k- i haven't proofread this bc it's 4am and im going to BED but if i write for any other chara's i'll post a second part <3 mwah

tags: gn!reader, diluc x reader, kaeya x reader, jean x reader, lisa x reader, albedo x reader, dainsleif x reader, tartaglia x reader, ohm ambros x reader, sulien ambros x reader, soft bean hours

diluc

is not working or traveling when his partner is sick

absolutely makes them soup and hot tea and drinks

he’s trying to make them food but he’s not the best cook so he’s asking adelinde for help

absolutely asks jean, barbara, and ohm for help while his partner is sleeping but he’s so awkward LMAO

was absolutely frantic the first day he found out his partner was sick tho, he made them come over to the winery so they could sleep there and he can take care of them <3

absolutely lied about what room was his so they slept in his bed

“hmm this guest room is so furnished diluc are all your rooms like this” and no, no they are not, this room is his, bestie

diluc slept on a sofa in his bedroom and did work on the table that was supposed to be for flowers. kinda stressed over abyss order locations but was more worried ab his partner being okay so he was distracted

he just put the flowers on his nightstand for his partner to see when they woke up <3

gives his partner forehead kisses because they won’t let him kiss them on the lips and he gives them the gentlest cheek kisses while they sleep

also gives his partner his clothes to wear <3

cuddles them and reads to them when they’re awake and TEMPLE KISSES OH MY GOD

kaeya comes over because he’s worried his brother and his brother’s s/o haven’t been seen in a little while

n e way, diluc gets sick after his partner gets better and they nursed each other back to health

kaeya

like diluc, he took off work so he could take care of his s/o i,mediately after he found out they were sick

wouldn’t force them to stay at his place tho, he’d probably let them recover in their own place

but he might make them go to the kof hq or the cathedral just so they can be taken care of by a proper healer

he absolutely soothes their fevers and stuff w cryo and also the man can heal himself w his elem skill ofc he can fix someone if he tries hard enough <3

he gives kisses no matter how much his partner says not to but he’ll also give them butterfly kisses so it’s soft moments too~ sigh, ur too cute alberich

asks ohm and barbara and albedo and lisa for potions and such to help his partner feel better but he’s really lowkey so he doesn’t seem SUPER worried

he just hates seeing his partner not feeling so well </3

refreshes his partner’s vase of flowers at their bedside every day

brings home work so he can watch over his partner. he can’t cook super well either so he asks for help and brings stuff home from good hunter too

jean was okay to let kaeya off of work and diluc would never admit it (man practically swore everyone to secrecy smh) but he helped take up some of kaeya’s duties in his stead

and kae, the alcoholic, didn’t even drink while his partner was sick bc he was lowkey worried they would need his help w smth and he didn’t want to be drunk just in case <3

many cuddles despite protests of getting him sick <3

jean

absolutely uses her healer skills to make her partner feel better

panicked when they were still sick and thought it was her fault </3 she asked barbara and ohm for help and they just told jean to relax a bit bc her partner was sick and it wasn’t going to be a quick fix

wanted to take off work but didn’t, so she just brought her work with her

kaeya and ohm very kindly took up her other duties where she had to leave so she could be w her partner

her partner is staying in the kof hq where they get access to ohm and barbara comes to visit <3 but also so that jean can sleep comfortably enough close by bc you cannot tell me this woman does not sometimes sleep in her office or the library and barely makes it to the kof dormitories sometimes

she’s so worried the entire time, she’s probably got a few gray hairs and a new frown line smh

she has clothes that aren’t her work clothes???? it’s so foreign seeing her in stuff like pajamas. you didn’t even know jean owned pajamas

jean sets them up in her bed at home (yeah she has a place outside of the kof hq??? it’s surprising) but it’s a big bed so they can rest and she’ll have the lamp on her side on while she sits up and does work

absolutely dotes on them. she’s good at making foods that make them feel better, she’s just a good healer that way <3

albedo, klee, venti, kaeya, lisa, and ohm all come over to check on jean and co and make sure everyone is doing okay <3 lots of food brought

if jean was asked to sing to her partner normally, she probably wouldn’t bc she’d probably get embarrassed but i think she probably sounds v good and venti would give her his lyre to try out a musical instrument too. but also she’d read to her partner and they’d probably fall asleep together uwu

lisa

works part time hours at the library so she can go visit her s/o

probably asks them to stay at the kof hq for easier access to medical assistance and plus she’s almost always there

“cutie” but worried and very 🥺 (pleading emoji)

makes soup and potions and reads to her partner until they fall asleep

also super playful omg she’s still got a smile on and is full of affection while she walks her fingers up her partner’s arm to their face so she can cup their cheek

she’ll make her partner laugh and smile and blush even when they’re sick, but she makes them laugh until they cough sometimes and immediately feels so bad

jean, barbara, kaeya, albedo and ohm all come to visit with different foods and soups and medicines and such

klee comes knocking and gives lisa some good fisherman’s toast and asks lisa’s s/o if they want to hug dodoco b/c that always makes klee feel better

purple roses galore, lisa has them in her partner’s room and they’ve got a potion to make the. uh. sniffer? to make the sniffer feel better. don’t ask me how, idk but she would find a way to make them physically feel better with flowers

reads to her partner ofc, and she tells them stories ab her own life and time at sumeru sans the crazies

worried looks when her s/o is sleeping but also the softest smiles when they wake up pls-

albedo

cutest lil frown on his face when he finds out his partner is sick

immediately they are taken home and he’s testing to confirm what’s wrong w them and what he can do to speed up their recovery

he’s more distracted than usual at work but he’s coming over to your place all the time w what paperwork he can do

also sketches his partner while they don’t know. he’s got lots of beautiful candids of his partner sleeping, looking out the window, falling asleep, reading, even drinking water. he’s made the most mundane things look captivating

kaeya and ohm come to check on albedo when he doesn’t show up for work after a few days and it’s bc he’s taking care of his s/o with food and soup and alchemical potions and shit. and when kae and ohm come in, they find his partner opening the door wrapped in a blanket while albedo is asleep cuddling the pillow they left bc he stayed up the night before making soup and reading to them

klee has camped out on his partner’s couch, she helps w the cooking too~ she absolutely lets them hug dodoco and gives them a treasure to feel better too LOL

many kisses from klee and albedo, and they also go out to get treats for albedo’s partner too

domestic albedo cooking in his partner’s kitchen and for once it isn’t some alchemical potion that he might blow up the stove with

tartaglia

takes off work entirely but BOY OH BOY is he stir crazy smh

brings his partner to his apartment to rest <3

he’s so worried ab his s/o that he makes all the sick ppl food the first day, orders from wanmin restaurant when his partner wants smth different, and also gets toys and such to entertain them otherwise

also reads to his partner but, again, he gets stir crazy after a while

absolutely does workouts and katas in the living room and phew shirtless tartaglia working out? gets the heart rate up for sure ahem

rushes to his partner tho omg- need soup? water? a trip to the bathroom? another blanket? he goes to them the MOMENT he hears them moving around. absolutely dotes on them <3

his family knows ab his partner and he’s probably written letters ab them being sick~ his family sent snezhnayan herbs and flowers and medicines and such

zhongli comes around because he wants sugar daddy!tartaglia with tea and medicine from bubu pharmacy. hu tao is in tow with well wishes and a “hope i don’t find you at work!” which is. a little worrying because aren’t you just a little sick-

many kisses from tartaglia because he is Needy and he’ll absolutely get sick from cuddling his partner while they sleep

also he’ll probably just like. envelop his partner while they sleep. they’re all cuddled into him and he’s actually so warm it’s nice bc they’re cold w a fever and he’s living for comforting them

he’s so worried tho, he’s got the frowny face and he’s so adorable but he just doesn’t want his partner to feel sick

dainsleif

the man camps in ruins, he’s going to his partner’s house smh

he doesn’t go into the church either LOL so expect him in his partner’s home making dinner and doing their grocery shopping thanks

he would get ohm and barbara to come over tho <3 “fix them please” but also “how can i fix them”

is so dead set on making sure his partner takes their medicine at the right times, he’s so soft for them and them alone

cooks soup and old recipes he barely remembers from khaenri’ah. he doesn’t really get sick, so he doesn’t remember these ones too clearly. deffo brings back old memories he’d long forgotten

reads to his partner and tells them old stories of how the world used to be, his travels, gives them the gossip on a certain khaenri’ahn but doesn’t give away the name

ohm comes over with medicine and lollipops bc dain is so unlikely to go to the cathedral to get barbara smh

but also dain, so self-sufficient, is unlikely to want to ask for help, so ohm just goes to help anyway

dain with the old khaenri’ahn lullabies and tucking his partner into his arms and singing quietly while he holds them and rocks them to sleep

dain is immortal, he’s giving his partner kisses bc “i’m immortal, ofc i won’t get sick”

he got sick

but his s/o nursed him back to health and then there were smooches the end

ohm ambros

the doctor with his ill lover oh my god

he’s frowny, he’s taking care of his partner at his home in springvale and his home clinic is open to everyone else. but everyone knows his partner is the first priority LOL

kaeya and albedo come over to see if ohm is okay or if his house needs to be checked up on. they’re wondering if he went on a last-minute expedition to sumeru and didnt tell them

diluc comes over too, he’s just checking up on his best friend but he’s also stealing a cherry lollipop smh. he heard from kae that ohm’s partner is sick tho, so he brings some soup and good food over from adelinde. he also brings some of his own specialty food tho, the once upon a time in mondstadt <3

sulien sending letters to his big brother to see if his brother’s s/o is okay

ohm is also just super protective of his partner, there are not many people who come into his life who he loves and lets in in the first place. he’s absolutely trying to heal them with his own vitality, so their recovery is much shorter than initially expected

barbara also comes over w jean to check up on ohm and co, complete w a goody basket of soup, a teddy bear, flowers, and books

ohm reading to his partner <3 he’s got such a soothing voice even if his accent is wack LMAO. he’s reading stories and even his paperwork because just his presence is comforting

he puts his hands on his partner’s forehead to soothe the fever goodbye

ohm will not sing for his s/o simply bc he doesn’t think he sounds v good. and he probably doesn’t but it would be so cute to hear him try and please ohm? 🥺

n e way i want smooches idc if i’m sick KISS ME OHM AMBROS

sulien ambros

when he finds out his partner is sick, the man blinks like twice and then suggests so calmly that they go to his apartment in liyue

man does not sleep normally, he’s just going to nurse his partner back to health and read during their recovery. fruit tart can cover his duties for him <3

sulien cooks for his partner tho, he’s making soup and stuff and getting medicine from bubu’s pharmacy. he’s also picking up books on the way home but some of them are to be read to his partner so it’s okay-

like tartaglia, sulien works out while his partner rests and goes to them if he hears them moving around. he’s reading to his partner and not so frowny, but the slightest furrow of this man’s brow is already such a big expression of his concern <3

sends letters to ohm asking for advice ab how to help his partner feel better. ohm just sends a letter back with “i’m coming” and shows up within the day LMAO

reads to his partner, and the monotony of his voice is soothing and lulls them to sleep. he just looks at them affectionately (well affectionate for him) and presses a kiss to their forehead before finishing the story on his own and in his head

tartagalicious comes over and brings food, flowers and a teddy bear with some of sandrone’s paperwork but he sends a smile to sulien’s partner with some well wishes

scara comes over too just to visit and check to see where sandrone is, but scara is a grumpy bean so he just says “feel better” all brooding and like it’s a command to one of the fatui subordinates LOL

sulien like ohm uses his cold hands to soothe his partner’s fever and also gives them forehead kisses <3

Edit: a link to part 2

[alluringjae]

au cours de l’été - jjh

⤑ translation: over the summer

⤑ summary: this is a story of an exhausted painter who needed a breather from the hectic city life. so aside from moving to the countryside, the needed air in your lungs also came in the form of a person. this summer meant for pure relaxation, perhaps your heart may dive into him too.

⤑ pairing: jaehyun x female reader

⤑ word count: 15.2k (so much for saying that i’ll be writing shorter stories)

⤑ genre: fluff, romance, smut | author!jaehyun, painter!reader, strangers to lovers!au, 50s-60s!au, summer love in france!au

⤑ warnings: me inserting some french phrases because I want to practice (feel free to correct me if I made mistakes, i’ll appreciate them), fictional interpretations of real-life people, explicit language, jaehyun being such a romantic pls im in tears, mentions and scenes of burnout (the worst)

⤑ playlist: everybody loves somebody by dean martin | c’est si bon by eartha kitt | it’s always you by chet baker | les yeux ouverts by emilie-claire barlow | a sunday kind of love by etta james | the most beautiful thing by bruno major | try again by jaehyun and d.ear (duh) | free love (dream edit) by honne | petite fleur by jill barber | plus je t’embrasse by blossom dearie | so this is love by ilene woods and mike douglas

⤑ author’s note: this was an idea that just came to me after pinterest kept recommending me poetic beauty/try again jaehyun, so here we are! i intended to write less than 5k words but sometimes plans don’t go as planned once you really invest in the story yet i’m really happy how this turned out!

the romantic exhilaration in my bones are off the charts because this is jaehyun we’re talking about lol enjoy!

⤑ masterlist

⤑ leave me some feedback, constructive criticism, or hellos!

3 juin 1957

The city life overstimulated your entire system, losing your brainpower and inspiration. Another exhibition that’ll feature your works with other influential painters was happening at the end of the year, and you had nothing prepared so far. You’ve crashed to the deep end of creative fatigue.

So you needed to get away again; somewhere quieter and surrounded by nature.

That’s why you ended up in the countryside down south, somewhere within Provence. It’s purely just for the summer, but extensions were okay as long you get back at least a month before the show. Filing that leave of absence at the studio you worked at was worth it.

You rented an apartment overlooking the marketplace, where the heart of the village was. After arranging things from your boxes and luggage the entire day, you found out that you lacked in the food department.  

So the succeeding day, the entire morning was spent on grocery shopping downstairs then stocking them inside your refrigerator, freezer, and pantry. Right after changing out of your pajamas into a flowy floral dress and sandals, you decided to bike to the bakery that locals suggested. A must-go place for newcomers, they all raved.

“Café des Étoiles Perdues.” (Café of Lost Stars.)

The clear chimes of the bell resounded through the small, cottage-like lobby as you entered inside. An old woman, whom you assumed was the owner, welcomed you openly.

“Oh la la, vous êtes belle! Vous vous appelez (Y/N), la nouvelle venue, n'est-ce pas?” (Oh la la, you’re beautiful. Your name is (Y/N), the newcomer, right?)

She complimented, making you shyly mutter your answer. Wiping off the flour from her apron, she introduced herself kindly.

“Je m’appelle Camille. Mes spécialités sont les macarons pisctaches et des croissants avec des amandes. Autre chose que tu aimes?” (I’m Camille. My specialties are the pistachio macarons and croissants with almonds. Is there anything else you like?)

“J'aime tout ce que vous suggères, Madame.” (I’d like anything that you suggest, Madame.)

A younger man, who went by Jaemin, was a part-timer barista who asked for your coffee order. As he directed you to the best seat of the café, which was outside overlooking the garden of blooming sunflowers, you pulled out your sketch pad so you could capture this dreamy view. It was nothing like you’ve ever seen in your life.

You’ve decided on a theme already for your exhibit thanks to your conversations with locals yesterday, which was related to freedom. After being chained to cities for so-called better living and financial standards, it’s actually how your inspiration to create squeezed the life out of you like a lemon. Although it was fun at first to see those tourist spots, it eventually got tiring.

Another matchstick to graze intensity through your bones was what you prayed for.

While you’re engaged in a rough sketch of the scenery, the dandy presence of a young man entered the café with his books. White shirt, red trousers with a matching beret, he sported freckles on his pale face. Despite visiting his favorite café numerously, Camille was overjoyed to see him and his serene smiles.

“Jaehyun! What brings you here?”

“Bonjour, Madame! I’m starving for your croissants because I ran out back home.”

“Not to worry! I’ll pack up some so you’re on your way.” She lightened him up like one of her kids, taking one of the bigger paper bags.

“No rush though, Madame. I’ll be reading and working here for a bit here.” Jaehyun affirmed, bringing it out his wallet and called out for Jaemin.

“Un café crème, s’il vous plait.” (One cup of cappuccino, please.)

Jaehyun’s usual chair was by the large window, overseeing the wide garden planted by the citizens of the village way before he was born. It was places like this he missed after moving to the city for his education and work’s sake. 

That’s the thing when you’re coming from a rich family; you don’t have much of say with what your parents order you to do. However, his recent request to stay in his childhood home (or mansion) again was fulfilled because he couldn’t search for what he needed in the cities anymore.

Jaehyun was a sucker for romance; an old romantic others would say. A lot of women mistook his kindness as flirting on many occasions, but ironically he just wasn’t looking for anyone yet. 

Starting as a novelist in the said genre based on real-life stories of people he met in Paris, Barcelona, London, and more, his stories were popular hits especially to young adults who aspire to find love one day.

However, traveling to the known places no longer felt fun as he got older. The stories he gathered were very similar, just in different languages. It took an enthusiastic dinner with his family, specifically his only older sister Krystal retelling fond stories from their younger years to get the idea of moving back for a bit. So consumed with the city life, he wanted to see things from another perspective.

What was the difference between a love story formed in the countryside than in the city?

It’s been a month since he arrived, but he didn’t hurry himself to do his research. He’s been reading books in his family library, revisiting monumental places, exploring around the village, and reconnecting with old friends as if he never left. 

Readjusting to his former life would make writing easier when he’s motivated enough to do it again. Besides, his books were profiting well enough to his taste; good enough for the next 10 years according to his personal accountant, Kim Jungwoo.

Jaehyun resumed reading this book his mother recommended him before he left. Entitled “Réessaye”, which was about a young man who reunites with his childhood sweetheart after his arranged marriage failed. After what she put her through, he’s hesitant whether to try again or let her go.

Jaehyun enjoyed reading books with realistic outlooks on love because he found them more meaningful, enlightening how exactly it makes you feel and do. Even if he enjoyed reading sappy, fairytale-like stories from time to time, he always returned to the real ones as they only displayed the truth.

That love isn’t always rainbows and sunshine, but something that can also break you especially if you go after the wrong person. This kind of mindset was how he toiled on his stories, which gained him a status outside of his unavoidable labels such as “the only striking son of the Jeong family” or “Valentine Boy”.

He diligently browsed through the climax, where the main male character confessed all his constrained emotions to his sweetheart. But it was until Jaemin pressed the bag of croissants in front of his face after placing down his childhood friend’s drink to disturb his peace.

“Reading again?” He taunted, snatching his book away and throwing the bag on Jaehyun’s lap. “When are you writing that book already? Everyone is practically dying for you to release something new again!”

Jaehyun flatly shook his head, drinking his coffee quietly. It’s not the first time anyone asked (or pressured) him about his next release, and it’s the last thing he wanted to think about. “Not in the mood right now, Jaemin. Now off to work before Madame Camille scolds you again.”

“You’re just stalling because you have nothing to write, don’t you?” Jaemin cunningly expressed, raising a brow. He’s known to catch onto the people’s bs easily; the last person you’d want to say your secrets too and Jaehyun realized too late. Though lucky for him, Jaemin shut the topic down right away so he wouldn’t pop a vein.

“Sais-tu de la nouvelle venue dans le village, d'ailleurs?” (Do you know about the newcomer in the village, by the way?)

“Une nouvelle venue?” (A newcomer?)

Being stuck at his mansion recently, news about village affairs were now late to him. Jaemin’s finger discreetly pointed outside the window, pertaining to a young woman sat outside painting her view in front of her.

That would be you, shading all the flowers in bright colors.

Seeing a new face amazed Jaehyun, especially when she was almost someone right out of a book. In a neat bun with white daisies printed in her dress, she crossed her legs whilst continuing her movements. She bit her lower lip, frustrated over an accidental smudge she made and trying to fix it by blending it with another color. When she accomplished it, she swapped brushes. A thinner one, to outline the shapes of the flower. Her lips curved to a smile after finishing another one perfectly with the rest.

“Jaehyun?”

Jaemin snapped his fingers to his distracted friend, zoning out the window. Still something he hasn’t stop doing, he pondered. With a final snap, Jaehyun broke away from falling hard from his abstract. Jaemin calculated the problem so quickly, analyzing his friend breezily like his medical school requirements.

“Elle est splendide, n'est-ce pas?” (She’s gorgeous, right?)

“Elle ressemble à une personne décente.” (She looks like a decent person.)

Jaehyun pushed it aside, flipping back to the page where he stopped reading. Before Jaemin responded, the door chimed open again to alarm him that a new customer came in. He excused himself to his friend, warning him that this wasn’t the last time he’ll talk about the newcomer too.

Jaehyun nodded along, not taking his friend’s cheeky words so seriously. However, the final result you attempted to create tickled his curiosity, so he slyly peeked from his book to the window.

You’ve freed your hair down, victorious to have started your collection this early in your break. A fantastic start, you let the paint dry first and munch on the croissant that served as your reward. However, you ‘re quick to notice a manly figure glancing through the window. From the side, his brown eyes appeared lively even if his entire face was hidden by the book.

Réessaye by Mark Lee; he must be a romantic. Every person in your studio read it, excluding yourself. Painfully beautiful, they’d summarize it.

Daring to meet more people, you locked eye contact with him. He didn’t expect it, almost flipping from his chair. Bashfully, you waved him a hello to somewhat break the ice. However, it broke his composure, and suddenly, he scurried off with his things from the café.

Now, you got quite worried. You checked your tiny mirror if he saw anything unpleasant with you, but you’d say you look relatively fine. Oh, maybe you could redeem yourself the next time you saw him. After bidding goodbye to Camille and Jaemin, the latter chased after you when you prepared yourself on your bike.

“By any chance, did you say hi to a guy with brown eyes and a red beret?”

“Well, more like I waved at him, then he zoomed out. Did I do something wrong?” You questioned with concern, putting your hands on the handles.

“That’s my friend, who’s quite reserved with strangers. I’m sorry on his behalf.”

“Nah, it’s fine.” You brushed it off politely. “See you again soon, Jaemin!”

Peddling away, letting the cool breeze fan you, your mind reverted its thoughts to that strange man. Maybe you’ll give it some time; you had a lot of it.

“Shucks, he was pretty cute.”

12 juin 1957

The world must really be on your side with these good decisions because you crossed paths with the strange man again in the café a week later. But instead of running away, he asked nicely if he could sit across your free chair in front of your table outside. It was a Saturday, and the place was packed.

“Joignez-moi, s’il vous plait.” (Join me, please.)

You insisted, giving yourself time to subtly observe his physique a lot more. Freckles dotted under his eyes like a constellation, bushy eyebrows, pink cheeks to match his pale complexion, and wearing a fuzzy knit sweater that meshed well with his green beret. He had some sort of necklace too; there was a heart pendant.

“Vous êtes une artiste.” (You’re an artist.) The small wooden palette of paint beside your small sketch pad was exposed, finding it as a great icebreaker.

“Une peintre, spécifiquement. Franchement, les visuels ici sont trés captivants qu'à Paris.” (A painter, to be specific. Frankly, the visuals here are more captivating than in Paris.)

“Je suis d’accord,” (I agree,) Jaehyun leaned against his chair, taking a better look at you with the remaining light from the descending sun.

“Oh, vous êtes comme moi. J’habite à Paris aussi.” (Oh, you’re like me. I live in Paris too.)

“Bon, je suis née à Londres. Puis, j’ai déménagé où je voulais en Europe depuis j'avais 18 ans. Mais oui, j’habite définitivement à Paris maintenant.” (Well, I was born in London then moved wherever I wanted in Europe for inspiration since I was 18. But yes, I live permanently in Paris now.)

You clarified, beginning to enjoy his comforting company. Initiating conversations with people you’re not acquainted with wasn’t in your range of skills, though he didn’t have an intimidating vibe. He looked too youthful to act like that.

“Je m’appelle (Y/N), d'ailleurs.” (I’m (Y/N), by the way.) You stuck out your hand as a sign of respect, which he enthusiastically obliged.

“Salut, (Y/N). Je m’appelle Jaehyun.” [Hi, (Y/N). I’m Jaehyun.]

He kissed it in a gentleman fashion, applying the manners he’s been taught since he was a child. Should you have been flustered, but no.  It’s been a long time since anyone greeted you like that, specifically back home.

Throughout your talk, you learned more about who he was, his job, and what his life in the countryside is like. He was an author of romance novels, yet you’ve never heard about him prior. Heavily prioritizing your work, you don’t keep up with the new releases or trends at all. Though after mentioning his last name, it piqued your interest.

“Jeong? As in the business, Jeong Tea Inc.?”

“Correct.”

His family was one of the most affluent families in Parisian society. Old money immigrants from South Korea, they brought their tea business to France and it boomed successfully. You’re quite sure you’ve seen his parents in past exhibits, but never did you approach them because you were a rookie then. But he reassured you that it was fine, and to just treat him like you’d treat your friends. Plus, it came to your knowledge that he was the same age as you too.

He opened up how this village was where he lived his childhood, so he asked his parents if he could hand over their mansion for a while for rest. It then shocked both of you at how identical your reasons were for staying in the countryside.

“I’m burnt out from the city, so I’m trying to regain my spirit here hopefully. Besides, I needed a change of scenery after living there for 3 years. My longest stay yet outside of London!”

“I need new ideas for my books. The cities don’t charm me anymore, so I returned here for peace and quiet. Maybe let these ideas come to me rather than me going after them.”

From a bigger lens, people would conclude your interaction as a sight of two artists who passionately talk about their art. But to you, you’d interpret it as two relaxed, young adults in their twenties who simply wanted to run away from the pressures of their art and enjoy the summer as every young adult should.

Not cooped up in the studio or office, but innocently waltzing around with your youth while it’s still there.

début de juillet 1957

“Dépêche-toi, (Y/N)!” [Hurry up, (Y/N)!]

Jaehyun yelled at your open balcony from downstairs, parking his mini car beside your bike. He planned on taking you somewhere a little farther this time; to absolutely feel like one of the locals.

The countryside urged you to wear more dresses and flat shoes, so you took out a turquoise dress with a white scarf to wrap on top of your head. Like your relaxed fit, your mindset too was calm. Upon meeting him, he wore his round spectacles with a red knit sweater over a white turtleneck long-sleeved top. His fingers were adorned with silver rings, then around his neck was a thin black ribbon. He curled some of his hair again, a style you really liked of his.

You can’t lie, but this man could pull any trend or style and still look extra pretty.

Out of all the locals you’ve befriended in your stay, Jaehyun was always your companion. He took you to varying places that those locals don’t visit nor tourists acknowledge in their reviews for the past few weeks. For someone who hasn’t been in the village for a long time, his memory didn’t disappoint. His childhood was only filled with cheerful moments.

Today, he was taking you to a peaceful district of shops in the farther part of the village. It’s where he’d buy sweets, journals, and accessories with his mother, Krystal, and one of his housemaids every other weekend.

All the stores there were currently bombarded with blooming flowers along their alley, bringing more enticement to those who were roaming around. There was so much life here; the head waiter of one restaurant smiling at every passing customer, one florist handing a free flower to anyone who asks, and a young lady showcasing her jewelry collection to a bunch of women who looked like tourists.

“Cette librairie vendent des livres enveloppés dans du papier. Ma mère m'a offerte l'un d'eux pour mon anniversaire tous les ans comme une surprise.” (This bookstore sells books wrapped in paper. My mother gifted me one of them on my birthday every year as a surprise.)

He trained his attention at a rustic shop with open wooden windows giving a glimpse of their shelves.

“Avez-vous fini les lisant?” (Have you finished reading them?)

“Du début à la fin.” (From cover to cover.)

He took you to this rooftop restaurant overlooking the entire plaza. Since he didn’t arrange a reservation yet didn’t get rejected, he must know the owner. Especially how a lot of the staff gave casual hellos and high fives.

Speaking of the owner, he walked out of his kitchen to introduce himself to you. He went by the name Moon Taeil, another one of Jaehyun’s childhood friends whom he used to play at his house whenever his parents came along.

Gobbling up in the appetizing food Taeil prepared beforehand, Jaehyun brought up your painting exhibition again. He loved hearing artists talk about their works, wanting to know more about their driven mindset and what their imagination is like. After all, it does vary for everyone.

“So far,” You poked your fork through the chicken, taking a bite of it. “I’ve produced 3 paintings. The garden of flowers outside Café des Étoiles Perdues, the kids playing hopscotch in the alley, and the peach tree outside your house.”

“Woah, you’re on a roll.” Jaehyun clapped across you, pouring you another glass of water. He recalled the nights you ranted not having any clue what to do for the exhibit. Then after taking you to more places, he’s rewarded to see you be creatively active again. “How many artworks do you left to make?”

“Around 3-4 left. I have ideas already, but I’m still brainstorming.” You internally rejoiced, loving how much progress you’ve made. “How about you, Jaehyun? How’s your progress?”

Unlike you, Jaehyun still felt stuck. Although he did find couples around the village, none of them intrigued him as much as his past stories. But he won’t give up easily; that’s not in his work ethic.

“Still searching, but I’ll get there.”

Recently, you got ahold of some of Jaehyun’s books from him personally since they weren’t sold in the village. You wanted to understand how he became so well known outside the labels people put him under. Reading his first novel entitled “Des Papillons” (Butterflies), it was about a couple separated during World War II without contact or knowledge about their well-being. Yet whenever they saw butterflies on the day they parted, they took it as a sign that the other was alive wherever they were.

You’re always hanging on the cliff when the scenes revert back and forth to the main male lead getting stuck in intense war scenarios, rooting for him to get out alive each time. In the end, it took 7 years before they were reunited and wed.

Jaehyun had a wonderful way with his words and descriptions, managing to enwrap you in as if you’re also a character in the book. Like how you rooted for that male lead, you’re rooting for him to find his spark again.

Following this uplifting conversation, Jaehyun finally took to your greatly anticipated spot. It was the main viewpoint of Gordes, one of the most beautiful hilltop villages in the country. The sunset was about to hit, and the lights from the city across you slowly turned on like a bunch of dominos.

As you marveled at its aesthetics, Jaehyun leaned against the hood of his car. He sensed how in awe you were, more than you ever were in the city he assumed. So used to the city that being surrounded with nature became foreign to you.

He took out his polaroid camera from his trunk and captured a photo of you from behind. The shutter sounds were obvious, turning your back at the commotion. Jaehyun fanned the freshly printed photo to dry, giving a mischievous smile.

“What can I say? While you’re fawning over the view, mine was more enamoring.”

Although Jaehyun felt overwhelmed the first time he locked eyes with you, he can’t resist the power of his developing feelings for you. The more time he took you around, the more his heart found different details about you to admire. After listening to all those love stories in the past, the people he spoke to shared how there will be some distinct moment where your heart decides who they’re longing for.

That exact view of you by the cliff, he already knew.

He’s infatuated by you.

“Tu es très ringard, Jaehyun.” (You’re so cheesy, Jaehyun.) You scoffed sassily, with a hand on your waist.

“Un gentleman ne ment jamais, (Y/N). Allez, il fait nuit maintenant.” [A gentleman never lies, (Y/N). Come on, it’s night already.]

He cleverly responded, grabbing his car keys from his pocket. The trip back to the village was energizing, putting down the roof of his car to relish the chill breeze of the night weather. You even raised your arms in the air, losing your scarf even from the speed Jaehyun went at!

The two of you belted along to the songs on the radio when the fields were the only ones surrounding you, no neighbors to shout at your rambunctiousness.

The late-night hours drew by so quickly almost like dinner with more of Jaehyun’s friends didn’t happen. Arriving at the front doors of your apartment complex, Jaehyun raced over to your side to open your door. Always maintained proper observation of manners, you appreciated that side of him. Rarely anyone in Paris that you’ve encountered treated you that way because you were a foreigner.

“Bonsoir, (Y/N).” [Goodnight, (Y/N).]

“Bonsoir, Jaehyun. Quand est-ce que je te revois?” (Goodnight, Jaehyun. When can I see you again?)

“Demain et après-demain. Appelle-moi quand tu es libre.” (Tomorrow, and the day after that. Just give me a call when you’re free.)

With a short wave, you entered your building and marched up to the stairs. A good day only meant being tired to the core, ready to crash and fall in your soft bed. Opening your wide windows to let more of the cool breeze in, your eyes easily caught Jaehyun’s classy car still there. As for the owner, he didn’t move an inch from his leaning position.

“Rentre à la maison, Jaehyun! C’est tard!” (Go home, Jaehyun! It’s late!) You shrieked, peeking side to side to make sure none of the neighbors scold you.

Jaehyun laughed wholeheartedly, not budging at all. “La nuit ne fait que commencer, ma chérie.” (The night has just begun, my darling.)

“Comment tu m'as appelé?” (What did you call me?)

Either your ears were fooling you or he addressed you by a divine pet name. The gasp you swallowed, as your entire body tingled with exhilaration. Your mind would simply disregard it like his former teasing words, but your heart begged to differ.

Rather than responding with words, Jaehyun’s voice serenaded you with a wondrous song, C’est Si Bon by Eartha Kitt, that played on the radio earlier. Out of the blue, a random guitar accompaniment followed his baritone vocals.

“En voyant notre mine ravie,”

Against the railing of your wired balcony, your body shifted forward to watch him better.

“Les passants dans la rue, nous envient,”

Your hand perched on your cheek, admiring his talent.

“C'est si bon de guetter dans ses yeux,”

It was like a lullaby, and here you were drowning in its peacefulness. Sensing the passion he gives off in his singing, your heart couldn’t refrain the strings inside from being swayed and tugged.

This was your moment of realization: that you too were smitten.

“Un espoir merveilleux, qui donne le frisson…”

À la mi-juillet de 1957

“Hello, nature!” You greeted brightly as your legs raced the huge garden in his manor. It was the first time he invited you over, too lazy to go out of the city. His social battery needed a recharge for the weekend, so a picnic within his home would do the trick. Additionally, it was an excuse to bring you over after the numerous times you’ve begged him to.

Jaehyun merely shook his head, enjoying the rush of childlike fun in your veins while you squealed and grazed your hands through the flowers.

He carried a wooden basket full of treats his family maids cooked, taking his time to venture through the rows of flowers. They were growing healthily and phenomenally these days, sometimes riding his bike to personally water them since he became busy with writing again. Lately, he found inspiration again, and so he wrote day and night to set them free.

“Voila!” You yanked out a sunflower, sniffing it a little. “Come on, Jaehyun! Pick up a few for our lunch!”

He followed your order, picking out some he found ideal. But just for fun, he put down the basket and carried you from behind out of the blue. You tried kicking him away, but his muscular arms can’t compete with your soft ones.

“What are you doing?”

“You said to pick up a flower, so I did. The prettiest of them all.”

His flirtatious words were never serious, yet you took it as a compliment. That’s how high your confidence is. Only we define our own worth, not others. The two of you chatted more about your lives until the first rain of the season poured down, chilling down from the raging heat. None of you had an umbrella; the weather was too unpredictable.

Deciding to just run for it, he gave you the wooden basket to protect yourself whilst he used the blanket you’ve sat on. Running with laughter to return to his mansion in the muddy dirt, the cool drops shivered your figure yet felt fantastic.

If you were in the city, you’d panic because it’d mess your appearance and your boss would be infuriated by your unprofessionalism. But in the countryside, it didn’t matter at all. The condition of the rain wasn’t budging to improve, getting stronger by the minute. His entire house even lost power, his housemaids having to bring candles to his bedroom and your assigned one once night dawned.

It was hopeless to return home for you, plus it’s dangerous to drive in in the dark, narrow streets too. Jaehyun handed you some of his fresh clothes so you’d be free from flinching from cold dress sticking to your body.

“Get dressed and some sleep, (Y/N).”

Nodding, you excused yourself to find the bathroom. You’d assume it’d be easy, but this was your first time in his house; a mansion even. Doors from left to right, long corridors that seemed never-ending, no maids were within the vicinity whom you can ask for guidance.

Resorting to return to Jaehyun’s chamber for help, you were taken aback by what your eyes laid on. In front of his full mirror, he discarded his now-dried shirt. Even with the dim lighting, you could make out that he was fit by the transparent view of his abdomen. Peeping like this was wrong, yet you couldn’t turn away just yet. The heat in your cheeks was inevitable, finding composure in such an unholy sight.

Though a gear in you suddenly twisted; a gear that straightened your nerves. You’re taking a bold move on the chessboard of your feelings. Wholly opening his bedroom door again, you leisurely sauntered inside without warning.

“Oh, (Y/N)! Ne peux pas trouver la salle de bain?” (Oh, (Y/N)! Can’t find the bathroom?)

Unbothered as he stood shirtless, you on the other hand silently dropped his clothes on the floor. Holding intense eye contact, your fingers graciously unzipped the side of your dress. Inch by inch, the tension built up like the strong tiny flames lit on the candles around you two. Joining the pile of clothes, all that remained were your white lace undergarments. Unplanned for the get-go, it’s the ideal set for your earlier outfit at the picnic.

“Je me suis perdue, mais je pense avoir trouvé quelque chose de mieux.” (I got lost, but I think I found something better.)

Your fingers grazed your arm up to your collarbones, faking your naivety. From your lust-filled stare, the glint in Jaehyun’s eyes darkened. He gulped at the revealing sight of you, brushing his hair back to restrain himself.

None of you could utter a single word, only the vivacious rain being the only sounds ringing around you. Thus, you allowed your actions to pursue precisely what you desired to do.

Taking baby steps towards him to test the waters, he met you right in the center and closed the leftover space. His hands cradled your face, whilst yours clung to his chest. His lips tasted like red wine, watching him pour in a glass for himself earlier. He did offer, yet you declined.

Your tongue darted his lower lip, gaining access after. Sensing the edge of his bed, you plopped yourself down the cushion. His knee urged your legs to widen, letting his body slide in. From your face, his fingers lowered to the back of your bra, snapping the clasps open.

“It takes skill to accomplish that in one try, Jaehyun.”

“I lived in Paris too, ma chérie. You out of all people would understand and have the experience.”

His palms massaged your freed breasts, throwing your head back even more to his pillows as his lips ravaged down from your stomach until the fabric of your not-so pure panties.

“Call me that again, please.”

“Ma chérie, seras-tu mienne?” (My darling, will you be mine?) He kissed and licked the tiny ribbon in front repeatedly, where your now-swollen clit laid. It electrified your bones, pulling on to his ruffled hair.

“Tu peux m'avoir.” (You can have me.)

Sex in the form of one-night stands were all you’ve invested; upcoming artists like you weren’t capable to maintain long-term relationships. Les plans à trois even if you’re extra freaky or drunk from the afterparties of your events. All that these occurrences had in common were not seeing those men ever again after sneaking out of their apartments in the morning.

This time, it’s different.

When they said that doing the deed with someone you’re romantically entangled with was more special, they didn’t bluff. You could plan bits of your life, but it can sometimes change aspects of it when you least expect it. Sometimes for the best or the worst, but right now, it went beyond your expectations.

It’s rewarding that the man you’ve slowly fallen for within your stay returned your affections.

Around late 3 am that night, your brain jolted with artistic ideas that awoken your sonorous rest. There are no hopes of sleeping them off because they tend to bother you for hours until you do something about it. But you’re already so cozy having Jaehyun’s arms around you, skin to skin under the duvet. His lips daunted right above your forehead, recalling his endless kisses there that helped you fall asleep.

Well, these ideas don’t work themselves unless you do. Untangling him tactfully, you stepped out of the blanket and wore one of his long white shirts he gave you earlier before pulling out your sketchpad and palette of oil paints.

Luckily, there was still one available candle to use as the rest have melted indefinitely. You slid the matchstick again to the sand surface, boring a flame from the friction which you placed on top of the wick.

All your ideas that night leaned towards one thing, or person rather: Jaehyun.

You spent a few minutes retracing how he vividly looked at the picnic, leaning back from the chair of his work desk. His outfit of a turquoise turtleneck underneath a white button-top with trousers matching the said turtleneck looked good together, how his ears tingled red after you complimented his newfound inspiration for his book, and the prominent veins in his arms when he rolled his sleeves due to the heat.

The thin brush you held defined the shape of his face, then paying attention to the messy strands of his hair. Stroking in a circular way to outline his eyelids, a hoarse grunt disturbed the peaceful silence.

“Get back in bed, ma chérie.” His eyes drowsily opened, lying on his side. The moment he no longer felt your warmth, he worried something happened. Instead, you’re working late at night after quite a rough yet romantic night.

“Shush,” You shunned him down with your index finger. “Give me a few more minutes.”

“Perhaps, are you painting me?” He hunched from the covers. “Your eyes looking back and forth would never lie to me, would they?”

“Maybe…” You teased, batting your eyes at him without any risky intentions. Or not?

He deeply chuckled, sluggishly removing himself under the covers. In his pure nudity, he advanced himself towards you. You shrieked, covering yourself with your free hand.

“Jaehyun, stay back! I told you I’ll be there soon!”

Not listening, he carried your bridal style, making you drop your precious palette to the fur rug. Laying you carefully, he popped each button open. By the sight of his cock hardening again, you knew you were in for another round with him.

“Wet again, ma chérie? Oh, this will be fun.”

Fin de juillet 1957

So this kind of summer romance concept that everyone fantasized about… it became your present.

Together you’d stroll in the smaller streets and immerse yourselves in the unique culture of the village. Whenever anyone saw you together, holding hands, biking, or what-not, they’d praise in the name of love for bringing you both together. A romance like yours in the countryside was a lively sight.

Remember how extensions were a possibility if your search for inspiration wasn’t found? Well, it’s not a question that you’d make one, except inspiration found you instead. And he had one arm around you as he slow danced with you in the open grounds of the village, listening to the live band covering song classics.

In particular, Chet Baker. He was Jaehyun’s favorite artist at the moment.

There was an ongoing week-long festival dedicated to summer, giving more plants their bloom and spreading gratitude to the hardworking people. Especially the students, off on their break.

The faint radiance from the post lights as Jaehyun swayed you around, making you laugh as he tried to mumble the lyrics of the song. All those glasses of wine he tried earlier with you from the bartender offering it for free had its effects, and you weren’t off the hook from them either.

Blisters started to form from your ankles, adjusting to the new pair of heels Jaehyun gave (or insisted to buy) you a while ago after staring at them like lasers. You’ve always provided things for yourself that being spoiled by someone else felt weird to you.

“If there’s anything you want me to buy for you, just tell me.”

“How can I buy you if you’re already mine?”

His smooth talk often made you punch his shoulder, but it’s just a mechanism to hide the exhilaration.

Under each other’s spells in your dance, you laid your head on Jaehyun’s chest. Feeling the strong beat of his heart, you were reminded of how much life he’s filled with. And you became a part of it, in the same way he crossed yours.

Jaehyun’s lips sank to the top of your head, pecking it affectionately. The first-ever summer where he wasn’t stuck at his desk working or drinking his life away with his rich friends in their Parisian homes, it couldn’t get better than this.

“Oiii! Flirtez ailleurs!” (Oiii! Flirt somewhere else!) The distinct voice of Jaemin, handing out pastries to passersby, shouted at the both of you, making you flip your middle finger at him.

“Trouve une copine d’abord, d’accord?!” (Find a girlfriend first, alright?!) You shouted back jokingly, almost falling due to the ache of your feet. Your immodest behavior was censored by Jaehyun’s large palms, not wanting the kids around to see it. Whispering closely to your ear,

“Tu es ivre. Laisse-moi te ramener chez toi.” (You’re drunk. Let me take you home.)

You changed back into your sandals as Jaehyun led you through the different alleys. Your vision was too hazy to navigate, so he had one arm wrapped around your shoulders. The weather grew cold too, shivering your bones so he draped you in his blazer.

“Wait,” You stopped, making him do the same. But before he could ask for your reason, your hands yanked him by his suspenders and your legs walked backward to reach the brick wall. Standing in his 5’11 glory, you were overpowered.

Yet your lips captured his effortlessly, raising to your toes to press yourself closer to him. He moved fast, one arm hugging your waist while the other hoisted your leg up. Tangling around his waist, the urge to move your hips against his crotch couldn’t be contained any longer.

Everyone was probably still out at this time or sleeping. The sloppy sounds you’ve produced were beyond suitable for any audience. Not to mention, the nasty words Jaehyun’s pretty mouth spoke in your ears desired you to fall to your knees.

“Not afraid of getting caught, ma chérie? You want me to ruin you right here, right now?”

“God, Jaehyun,” Your hands tugged his belt forward, the friction it gave to your core twitched the naughty side out of you. “Do it, please.”

The idea of public sex thrilled your mind into overdrive, yet you’ve never done it. In Paris, a city where several people started to know your name, you didn’t need a scandal to be plastered in your resume yet.

Jaehyun himself included, and still opted not to give it to you.

“Another time, ma chérie. Your apartment, now.”

The moment you unlocked your apartment door, Jaehyun was far from gentle like in the mansion. Ripping you out of your frilly dress didn’t take long, so was unbuttoning his trousers down to the floor.

On your knees, his hand gave you a makeshift ponytail as your tongue flicked the slit of his cock. Then slowly taking him inch by inch on your mouth, you’d let out a loud pop when you needed to breathe. Your hands fondling his balls, he groaned from the edge of your bed and tightened his hold on you. Tears formulated in your eyes as you got to swallow him whole, uncontrollably bobbing your head.

He felt like putty when he released, your throat taking the salty base. You hastily unhooked your bra in front of him when suddenly, his hand flicked on the fabric of your panties, cueing you to stop your motion.

“Keep them on when you ride me.”

Straddling on his lap, his head laid against the headboard of his bed. His arms roaming around your back to stabilize you, your fingers pushed your panties to the side as you pushed yourself down his protected length. Your moans became shaky. Up and down, you bounced while bracing on his shoulders.

Against his ear, your moans were harmonious. His hips moved against your beat, hitting your g-spot like the sexual ace he is. His thumb rubbing your clit, you shuttered your eyes at the impending high approaching you like a bus.

“I’m close.” You choked out, the overstimulation overwhelming your nerves.

“Fuck, me too.” He grunted, slapping your butt that made you shriek.

Soon enough, everything hit you both all at once. The knot snapped, and so did your body falling on his chest after a single scream. Panting, Jaehyun pecked on your temple as his cock softened up. Once you returned to your senses, you lifted yourself from his length, laying bare beside him.

His eyes started to fall, but before they did, he muttered huskily. “Je t’aime, (Y/N).”

It was the first time he’s said those words in the way they meant, and he’s more than certain that it’s what he felt with you. Sure, it started as mutual infatuation, but now, it can’t leave. Not on his watch.

Love was a concept unfamiliar to you, but Jaehyun slowly taught you what it was and how it felt like. Books and films may give sneak peeks, but to personally give and receive it back was made possible by him.

From this moment on, you could conclude that yes, you reciprocated it.

“Je t’aime aussi, Jaehyun.”

16 octobre 1957

Autumn made its way to the countryside.

The leaves switched into red-brown shades, the weather in the south was warmer, and the wine harvest was highly anticipated. Jaehyun’s camera was a common item in your outings, taking as many photos as he could so the two of you had something to look back on.

Planned and candid, his range was wide. These were moments that proved that your youth was as happy as you wished it to be. You wouldn’t trade it for anything else.

Painting in his mansion was a regular thing, having new canvases prepared at his patio. There were so many items that amused you there like you could base your entire collection on his home. It’s not like Jaehyun could argue; it meant more time with you whenever you came over.

“Jaehyun, if you smudge paint on me, so help me Go-” He refused to listen to your “threats”, smearing black paint on your cheek.

“You were saying?” He cockily pestered, showcasing his paint-filled fingers. You dipped one of your brushes into the new paint and chased after him without hesitation. The entire evening became a paint war, a laugh fit even after seeing your reflections in the mirror. But before you could clean yourself, Jaehyun’s camera was by your face and he pressed the button.

“Still breathtaking.”

But the middle of the season arrived, that’s where your planned extension you’ve reached its end. The exhibit was next month, getting calls from your boss regarding your return and the paintings you’ll present. You informed her that you already had them mailed to your studio way back, so there’s nothing much to worry about.

All your bags were packed in the private car Jaehyun rented. Here, you’re bidding your goodbyes to every friend you’ve made outside the doors of your apartment complex, saving your last words with Jaehyun.

The night before, he stayed over and helped you pack your last items in luggage bags. He even brought extra clothes for you so you wouldn’t work extra. You’ve talked it out the whole evening through what happens next to ease your worries. In your bed, he opened the wide windows and pulled you under the sheets.

“Write to me.”

“Call me when you’re free, or whenever you feel like it.”

Leaning against the railing of the stairs, watched the sorrow in your face over this parting. He sensed how bittersweet everything was, but he wouldn’t change anything about it. He’s positive that your story won’t end here, not right now.

Sauntering to him, you sighed whilst taking your bag he held the whole time from him. His touch was tighter as the two of you hugged tenderly, nuzzling his head on your shoulder. The scent of his citrus cologne that implanted in your brain felt comforting, despite the uncertainty of everything between you.

You hinted a minty taste from the menthol candies from his home as his lips brushed yours, colliding it timely. He waited when everyone left, relishing these last seconds.

Stepping inside the vehicle, you waved your summer love farewell one more time before the driver hit the pedal. Your eyes couldn’t stray away from looking back, the distance between him and your former apartment widening. Only when he was no longer in the frame, you shifted your focus back in front.

Your fingers fiddled with the charm bracelet he gifted you from the market. It was custom-made by a jeweler who was great friends with his mother in his younger years. There were two pendants chained on it: a paintbrush and the sun.

“A paintbrush to remind you of your passion, and the sun to remind you of the summer we first met.”

The man was like one of his romance books, in human form. He knew how to catch your breath effortlessly.

Your stay, for now, may have concluded, but there was always next summer. And the ones after that. The village felt like a second home, one you can’t neglect like the other places you’ve lived. Then having Jaehyun here, the more reasons to return.

Undoubtedly the best vacation you’ve ever been in your adult years, one that didn’t sacrifice for your art so you could compete with other artists. The weight on your chest poofed into thin air, and you felt ready for what the next steps as a painter were.

Appreciating the greenery you passed by, you peeked over the side mirror of the car only to find Jaehyun quickly biking in your direction.

Now, what was he up to?

You instantly requested the driver to slow down his pace, rolling down the window of the car. Not caring about the strong winds, “You fool, what are you doing?!”

Although he trusted your last words, he had the greed to see your face again. It would be a long time until he’ll see you in person again. So he pedaled as fast he could to still reach you. Oh, the things you do when you’re in love.

“Mon cœur bat la chamade pour toi, (Y/N)!” [My heart beats loudly for you, (Y/N)!]

You giggled at his silliness, throwing out flying kisses.

“Je reviendrai bientôt, Jaehyun!” (I’ll come back soon, Jaehyun!)

21 octobre 1957

Only your friends at the studio gave you a warm welcome back, receiving comments like “get back to work” from your first encounter with your boss. Popping a champagne glass open after work hours on the rooftop of your studio, they interrogated you with all the questions they could think of.

“So this village in Provence…. was it beautiful as the tourists said?” Ten, who moved from his home in Thailand to Paris at a young age, expressed his curiosity whilst leaning against the railing overlooking the Eiffel Tower.

“Beautiful is an understatement, Ten. I miss it dearly!” You heaved a sigh, twirling your glass.

“So this inspiration you were looking for…” Amélie, your dear friend since your university days, created some tension as she prolonged her last word. Playfulness twinkled in her eyes, crossing her legs. “Was a person involved by any chance?”

For a moment, your throat almost gagged on the sizzling alcohol going down.

“What do you mean?” You acted clueless, pouring your now empty glass with more booze. But the moment Ten gave you the troublesome look coordinating with Amélie, you already knew you wouldn’t hear the end of it. These two were such gossips in and out of the studio.

Ten took the seat across you on the table and leaked all his pent-up information.

“So you know Seo Youngho, the only son of the Seo family. Rich, socialite, a total hotshot… yeah, all that jazz.” He dived in, seeing you nod over knowing that man. Someone in the past you’ve slept with, but that’s another story. “Well, Amelie and I attended one of his parties at his large penthouse. He had his usual crowd there; Kim Doyoung, Lee Taeyong, Nakamoto Yuta, and Lee Minhyung. But fun fact: there’s another member in that friend group who doesn’t go to these kinds of events.”

“Here’s where it gets interesting,” Amélie excitedly took off like the pipelette (chatterbox) she is. “Youngho, who was talking to us for a bit, asked where you’ve run off. Poor him, he must’ve missed you in his bed but anyway! We told him that you went down south somewhere in Provence for a break. Oddly enough, he mentioned how the mentioned member moved back there for the same reason.”

Ten and Amélie gave each other another frisky look, merely to piss you off. So predictable of them.

“Get to the point please!” You screeched.

“Jeong Jaehyun, ever heard of him?” Amélie imitated your tone of voice. “I mean, you should since you made a whole painting of him.”

“H-How,” Speechless, that’s what you were. Ten went on a fit of giggles, signaling the build-up of his intoxication.

“Youngho visited the studio to find a specific painting for his home, and we helped him in choosing. Then when your deliveries of paintings arrived that day and were unwrapped, the look on his face when he saw Jaehyun’s painting was priceless. Things started to add up, especially when he told us that he called up Jaehyun prior, he said that Jaehyun was seeing a girl during his stay there.”

“A young, burnt-out painter from Paris, to be specific.”

They’ve put you on the edge of the cliff, and it was too close to call it a coincidence. Of all things to be revealed, this had to be the first.

“Well, I was waiting for another time to tell you guys about him though.”

Their gasps of joy could give you guys a noise complaint by the neighbors, telling all about your escapades of him and you. During it, the more you missed seeing him daily either on his bike or his car. It was stuck in your routine, but now it’s reverted to your old one.

Could the next summer come any faster?

14 février 1958

Perhaps your newest collection at the Louvre was your most successful one yet.

Entitled “Inspirez, Expirez” (Breathe In, Breathe Out), your sceneries during your stay in the village varied. An old couple slow dancing under the night sky, and the quiet district of shops Jaehyun took you, those were some of your last additions.

A multitude of positive reviews on the newspapers and art magazines came in, commending on taking on a fresher, brighter outlook for a change whilst finding your spark again. As fulfilling it was, what you longed the most was the one responsible for it.

Lately, it’s been tough to contact him. His maids always answered the calls, informing you that he was busy with work or family matters. It’s so rare for him to act like this. Whatever it was, it wasn’t grand or serious hopefully.

Back to your collection, tonight was the last night of it. Just in time for Valentine’s day, where numerous socialite lovers embarked on this event, but you’re more fixated that it was also Jaehyun’s birthday. A boy full of love born on the day dedicated for it, things made more sense. In case, you’ve sent your birthday wishes to him through letter and passing the message to one of his maids. Even on his special day, he hasn’t reached out to you.

But to momentarily forget about that, there was a closing ceremony held for this exhibit with the other artists involved, and it was your turn to give your final remarks. More esteemed socialites and journalists were present, which didn’t halt your nerves the slightest. You were a professional after all, holding pride in your craft as you stood in front of the microphone wearing your new favorite custom-made gown.

There are perks when you have close friends in the fashion industry, specifically Kim “Key” Kibum from the House of Key. After defending him from a disrespectful client when you were picking up a dress for your boss during your internship years, not only did you earn his respect, but an invite to his shows and first claiming of new items from his collections. Dining in expensive restaurants in the metro was a plus, catching up on your lives. Sometimes calling each other out for your sexcapades too.

Speaking of him, he was in the crowd that night, ordering every photographer to take photos of your gorgeous self in one of his dresses. Or in your opinion, bribing some by how he stuffed a few thick stacks of Euro bills down their pockets.

Only one of it ever made. A dark green satin v-neck off-the-shoulder gown, where diamonds adorned your neck and ears and white stilettos kept your perfect balance. Also courtesy of Key.

Because it’s the winter season, he gifted you a limited edition white fur coat every socialite tried getting their hands on. Your hair was styled in a bun, emphasizing your dark tinted lips from this new lipstick Amelie insisted you buy.

Most people would get the first impression that you were one of the socialites, a child from one of the affluent families even. But you were a lot more remarkable than that, having inborn talent in the arts that you specialized over your youth and rising to the top without any parental help.

“Thank you to everyone for their endless support towards the magnificent collections of each artist present. As for mine, I am grateful to rechannel my creative side by taking a break. Rather than romanticizing overworking our bones to the core, there’s nothing wrong with taking a step back from the pressure. Being alive is a blessing, realizing further how our youth won’t stay with us forever. Being away from the boisterous cities, I found relaxation in the countryside of Provence.”

Your lips quirked into a grin as every single memory during that time reeled in your head like a movie. “The beauty of Provence cannot be simply put in words. The muses I’ve encountered were more than lovely, especially the man behind the Poetic Rose. With that, I sincerely thank everyone from my bottom of my heart and I hope to continue to support me in the years to come.”

The applause roared once you stepped down the platform, shaking hands with every esteemed guest with more gratitude as they praised you. These days, socializing with them was a lot easier. You’ve even taken more initiative to greet people first before they do, conversing with them easily about anything.

Key definitely noticed that as you toured him around your section, holding his nth glass of wine for the night.

“You, Madame (Y/N), transformed into a social butterfly.” He nudged your shoulder, smirking once he got a better view of his favorite painting from you. “I guess that’s the thing when you’re in love.”

“I beg your pardon?”

With this free hand, he motioned it up and down at the painting in front of you. “The Poetic Rose is none other than the youngest son of the Jeong family, whom I’ve met through his older sister, Krystal.”

“Am I really the only one who doesn’t know him?!” You stressed, jokingly. Key was elated to capture you in his trap, the changes of your personality too evident in his eyes. Figuring it out that it was love took a while, but being acquainted with Krystal, she’s the one who told him that her younger brother was in love with a painter in Provence. Do the math.

“I’ve met him through his older sister, one of my highly favored clients. He’s not much of a socialite like her, so I don’t really blame you for that.”

Searching for a waiter to refill your wine glasses, a surprise emerged the both of you.

“Madame Krystal, you’re absolutely stunning.”  Key complimented her, giving the engaged heiress of Jeong Tea Inc. kisses on the cheek as respect. Her recent engagement to Kim Donghyun, her childhood sweetheart and also the heir of Kim Couture, was the talk of the town.

They arrived at the event together, drawing the attention of everyone in the room earlier. Now, he was speaking to a few influential socialites he made a deal with this week about the art collections present.

“Key, you never fail to look fantastic,” She remarked positively, poking his necktie before placing her undivided attention on you. “So you must be (Y/N) (Y/L/N). You’re beyond bewildering in that gown.”

“Flattered to hear that, Madame Krystal. Such a pleasure to meet you.”

The three of you chatted as if you were the only people there. From art, passion, and love, pride filled in your chest when you toured your collection. It was like walking down memory lane for her, adding out how she used to climb the peach tree with her younger brother during their childhood. Once her eyes laid on Poetic Rose, she took her time admiring it.

“My younger brother grew up well. That’s all I could ever hope for as his only older sister.” She paused, noticing how silent you became when you stared at the painting along with her. She observed the passion lit in your eyes, yet there was longing behind it by the way your lips pouted briefly. “You must really love him, do you?”

“I do, truly. After meeting him, not only was I boosted with so much ideas, but my heart embraced him for what and who he is in this universe.” You professed confidently, earning an approving smile from Krystal.

“If that’s how you feel, why not tell him that yourself?”

Her fingers gestured you to turn around. Stood in a grey suit with his brown hair slicked back, it was like seeing a completely new person. A handsome one though. His fashion in the countryside heavily differed from his fashion in the cities. So sophisticated and refined, he looked like a prince straight out of a fairytale.

Your fairytale.

“Jaehyun.”

It’s like everything stopped once he sprinted towards you, pulling you off your feet for a snug hug. Your arms threw themselves on his neck by instinct, not wasting a single second in his grasp. Your nose inhaled the woody scent of his cologne, something more formal than his usual fruity scent.

The smell of aftershave in his jaw couldn’t go ignored either, assuming that he must have had plans to go out tonight. Nonetheless, you squealed as if you were back in Provence, giggling at his boldness. Once he put you down, neither of you could get your hands off each other.

“What are you doing here? You didn’t tell me you’d be in Paris!” Clutching your waist, you gazed at him with doe-like eyes, instilling confusion.

“J’ai voulu te surprendre, my chérie.” (I wanted to surprise you, my darling.)

He chuckled, pushing some straying strands of your hair behind your ear. His eyes evoked so much endearment towards this elegant look you prepared, making his heart race as if he were in the gardens of his manor again.

Hearing his petname for you again attacked your heart every time no matter how much time passed, he lifted your chin high. Jaehyun urged himself to kiss you senseless right there, leaning lower. And yes, you anticipated it by how your eyes instantly closed.

Only if it weren’t for Krystal to clear her throat, obviously ruining the mood. Flinching away from your sensual lover, you rubbed the nape of your neck. Towards an heiress like her, it must’ve been unprofessional.

“Couldn’t you at least wait until I left, younger brother?” Her fingers flicked Jaehyun’s forehead, a teasing trick they used to do as kids. Even if she was a lot shorter now, it didn’t mean the impact was weak. He cursed under his breath, covering his forehead.

Stifling your laughter was a failure, crinkling your eyes to unleash your emotions. So this is what their sibling dynamic was like?

“Now excuse me, older sister. You didn’t tell me you were visiting the exhibit after my birthday dinner with our parents?” He crossed his arms, exchanging a judgmental look. For his sake, he wanted to maintain his pride. “All you said after dinner was that you were going straight home with your fiancé after all the alcohol mother gave you because it made you lightheaded.”

“Well, you know Key and his persuasiveness. He insisted I attend this event last minute because all the collections were amazing.” She explained, shedding a subtle glance at you. “Plus, it’s an excuse to finally meet this lovely girl you raved so much through your letters.”

Jaehyun kept his family life private, so this piece of information was new to you. The unpredicted way the fluttering feeling drew in your stomach, all you could do was smile from the flattery.

“He spoke about me to you?”

“More than speak, my dear. He practically professed his love for you, asking me advice on how to court a girl, make them smile, etcetera. You’re the first girl he’s been this affectionate with, and I completely understand now.” She patted your shoulder, hopeful. She had such a strong older sister vibe, reminding you of your older siblings back home. “You’re a clever, talented woman. I look forward to seeing you more often.”

As you nodded in approval, she turned towards her brother with her recurring teasing look. “Yah, Jaehyun. You better take care of her. If she ever sheds a tear because of you, I’m hunting you down in the gardens.”

“Harsh of you, Krystal.” He planted his hand on his chest, feigning pain. “But no worries. Having you and mother around me kept me well-mannered towards women growing up.”

Playfulness aside, Krystal felt honored towards her younger brother. Men these days maintained their sexist beliefs and rudeness, especially those who doubted her high position in the family business once her father stepped down. Nowadays, it’s men like Jaehyun who could really challenge the patriarchy and make women pursue a lot more than being limited as a housewife.

“I’ll keep that in mind. Now please excuse me, I’ll be on my way.”

Krystal waltzed her way out without tripping from her slight intoxication, which Jaehyun worried about earlier. But anyway, that left him alone with you. Filled with so many questions, you didn’t know where to start.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming to Paris? Why didn’t you acknowledge my birthday wishes to you? Why aren’t you answering my calls and letters?” You blurted without wasting a breath, weren’t trying to come off as needy, but it became peculiar when he was contacting you like usual.

You pushed off thinking of the worst scenarios, not wanting it to ruin your drive and your emotions either. Yet you trusted Jaehyun enough to know he wasn’t the type of person either.

“Okay slow down, ma chérie.” His hands maneuvered for you to stop for a bit. “Ask me one by one and I’ll give you a solid answer for each while we roam around.”

He arrived in Paris last week, which was initially for work. Then his birthday clashing was a coincidence. It would be too lonely to go home and celebrate his special day alone, so he extended. But again, it’s his work that caused his abrupt contact.

When you were too busy delving into the success of recovering your inspiration, he also found his spur to write again too. Day and night, his mind kept him tedious with an endless trail of thoughts and words. Overall, he finalized it then brought the end product to the same publishing house where his books in the past went through.

In fact, he decided to publish them specifically today on his birthday. The only day in his itinerary he planned, where after publishing, he’d hang out with his friends, have dinner with his family then run off to reunite with you.

“I didn’t intend to make you feel like a second choice, so please forgive me for that, ma chérie.”

“All is forgiven, Jaehyun.” You held both his hands, kissing them tenderly out of habit. “I’m overjoyed that you rekindled your creative side again.”

You were so understanding and empathetic, and Jaehyun aimed to act that way too. He learned so much from you as his friend before being his lover. Quickly enough, you’re both back to his portrait in the center. Like a critic, he narrowed his eyes and scrunched his nose. Tapping his chin with his finger,

“This man in Poetic Rose, he’s quite dashing.” He commented with conceit, walking closer to it to view it better. “His freckles are on point, his dimples and dazzling eyes too. Why exactly is he described as a Poetic Rose?”

“Well sir,” You stood beside him, imitating his actions. “This man here always spoke so eloquently, like he had a very poetic approach on life. He reminded me also of a rose by his rosy tinted cheeks and his beauty. He was alluring inside and out.”

“Is he your favorite muse?”

“I never quoted him as a muse because he’s more than that. Muses can be replaced once they no longer serve purpose towards the artist. Though with him, he’s the never-ending flame that I want to keep for the rest of time."

You held on to his hand, interlocking your fingers with his. The apparent reddening of his ears proved that he was flustered, yet you spoke no lies.

“Joyeux anniversaire, ma flamme.” (Happy birthday, my flame.)

“Merci beaucoup, ma chérie.” (Thank you, my darling.)

Something about his new release piqued your attention so you brought it up again.

“So tell me about your new book.”

“Let me show you instead.” Inside the blazer, there was an inner pocket that sealed a small hardbound book. Taking it out, he handed it over to you. “This is your copy.”

The cover of the book had an illustration of two young adults running down the fields under the bright sun, with the title written in cursive and placed in the center.

“L’Été de 1957.” (The Summer of 1957.)

Like a child who received a new gift in the mail, you flipped the book open. Seeing the table of contents and credits to other important people involved in the process, there was a detailed dedication right before the starting chapter. It’s an unexpected page, noticing that he never put anything like this in his last works.

“Pour ma chérie, qui a peint les couleurs manquantes de ma vie.” (For my darling, who painted the missing colors of my life.)

Although Jaehyun planned to write about the couples he met in the countryside, he chose to change his perspective. Instead, he based this new book on your summer romance, installing more original characters who made your romance blossom more.

“I was once so engaged in listening to people’s love stories, hung up on what they felt.” He expounded, pacing around the floor whilst you skimmed through the pages. There were black and white photos from your adventures too to wrap the reader further in the story.

“While I was struggling to find the next story, I realized late that my story with you was a perfect choice. When I fell in love with you, it’s like I didn’t have to fret anymore about anything. Everything slowly yet surely aligned into place for me. Like how we found inspiration in each other.”

A poetic speaker meant having a poetic, wise mind. You kept an open mind whenever Jaehyun shared his thoughts on life with you, an intimate time that didn’t require using your bodies. Whether you were stargazing or drinking wine by his patio, his soulful personality never changed.

“So I recapped every single memory we had and compiled them,” He resumed, taking a closer step towards yours. His warm hands grasped your waist again, catching a glimpse of your astonished face. Mostly, towards your lips that he missed feeling against his.

“This book expressed my own take on love this time, the one I want to grow in.”

You’d care less if you dropped the book and your coat right there, your major desire to kiss him again was driving your senses to the edge of a cliff. Nothing could’ve braced yourself the second you fervently collided your lips with his. It didn’t feel like you were in this exhibit, but somewhere back in his mansion engulfed in each other’s presence.

Your legs almost melted by your daring move, if it weren’t for Jaehyun’s arm moving upwards to your back to stabilize you more. Your body tingled with goosebumps due to his relaxing fingers all over your body. His tongue caved in your lips, and you couldn’t ban its access.

Such an explicit sight, it felt forbidden as you were inches away from the public crowd. Yet it was the least of your worries if they made a big fuss over it. Jaehyun was here again with you, and that was more valuable to you. He savored every trace of your touches, taking his delicate time with you. No past birthday could defeat this, especially when it’s the first one to celebrate with you. The first of many.

As much you wanted to keep this up for hours, your lungs started feeling constricted of air so your lips timidly let go. Though your hands couldn’t, your overwhelmed eyes couldn’t shift away from the heart-stopping view of your lover. Wherein even after such a fearless session, his eyes fused with love and need with his plumper lips.

“Everything about Provence, especially you, that’s the life I want.” You confessed this concealed secret that’s revolved your head for a while now. Yet its certainty was true.

“Are you sure, ma chérie? What about work?” As an artist, he believed you should stay where everything is accessible. Yet as his woman, he wanted you to follow your heart. Jaehyun didn’t want you to choose or struggle.

“I’ve grown out from the idea that the city life was the only life meant of an artist like me.” You replied, confident enough to discuss it after deep thought. “Cities like Paris hold exciting, vigorous flames that will have you clinging on to them. But then, they’ll eventually die the longer you stay. You get burned in the process too. However, I stand by what I said earlier. I found an endless flame when I met and began loving you, Jaehyun. It doesn’t sting at all; it illuminates strongly every living day.”

Urging him to lower his stance with your fingers, you stated one last phrase. “Wherever you are, that’s where I want to be.”

“If that’s the case,” Jaehyun acknowledged, sticking his arm out for you. “Let’s get out of here.”

Astounded expressions crowded the socialites in the event as they watched the both of you exit together. If the news of Krystal and Donghyun weren’t crazy enough, some journalists figured the mysterious man behind The Poetic Rose and spread it like wildfire.

How was the youngest son of the Jeong family turned renowned romance novel author connected to the impressive, up-and-coming painter from London?

What really went down in Provence?

“How can you miss out on the signs? Did you not see them share a kiss earlier?” Key protested to those who weren’t approving whatever relationship you guys had. He loved his tea but hated those who simply were money hungry. Wanting a chance to be a part of the rich family, only to fish them out of their riches sooner or later.

Meanwhile, the winter season didn’t stop any of you from roaming the streets of Paris. Moments like these were a preview of the future you’ve envisioned with Jaehyun. Youthful, free, and fiery, a love between two artists created more magic not just in their crafts but to those around them.

Promenading a street overlooking the Seine River, Jaehyun took out a smaller instant camera from his pocket and took a candid shot of you. Stunned, you slapped his chest with your bag.

“Hey! Just how many more things are hidden in your blazer?”

“Just my wallet and a few condoms. Why’d you ask?” He raised a suggestive brow, feigning good intentions.

You hummed, faking your deep thought mindset. “At this rate, I don’t think we’ll make it back to my apartment alive.”

Jaehyun tugged you by your coat, his lips hovering your ear to whisper. “If we call a cab right now, I can finger you in the backseat.”

You chuckled at his vulgar idea, but it seemed ideal. You loved the thrill of getting caught or having someone overhearing you two, just like him. Besides, his fingers don’t match up to yours when you touch yourself alone in your apartment. You bat your eyelashes, giving in.

“Deal.”

6 ans plus tard (1964)

Summer returned, the sun strongly smiling down to the plentiful flowers at your family garden. By the patio of your home, your canvas was already laid by the easel stand. Shades of yellow were applied first to symbolize the brightness of the day, following the outline of your desired scenery for this piece.

Dipping the brush in water to change colors, you took another glance at the breezy sky. Light blue with clouds resembling soft pillows, you inhaled gently as your brush faintly stroked the canvas again.

Your hair was tied in a bun, meaning that you’re in for a busy session. But a more soothing one as the jazz music flowed from the vinyl player inside. Stress was the last thing you needed right now.

“What’s madame artiste up to right now?” Your husband piped in from behind, placing down a tray of tea and crackers. With some top buttons of his white top left unattended, you glimpsed on his toned chest when he leaned down. But you mustn’t pry whilst working, even when temptation was calling your name repeatedly.

“The summer sunshine healed me of my discomfort, so I think it’s about time I painted again.” You chewed on the snack, looking back and forth to the view. As enchanting as all the flowers you and him planted over the years grew, you’re more amused by a little boy strolling around it with his magnifying glass and tiny wooden basket with his furry puppy by his side.

His tiny legs often troubled the two of you because he enjoyed spending time with nature. Only God knows what he found in the garden this time.

“Adrien est explorer encore. Devrais-je lui dire qu’il change de place, ma chérie?” (Adrien is exploring again. Should I tell him to change places, my darling?) Jaehyun cautiously asked, not wanting his 3 year old son to impair your perspective.

“Non,” (No,) You held on to his hand, kissing it sweetly. Although you peeved any unnecessary details found in your scenery in the past, Adrien was an exception. As his mother, it’s hard to say no to him unless necessary.

“Il est un garçon curieux, alors il devrait explorer et flâner où il veut.” (He’s a curious boy, so he should explore and wander wherever he wants.)

Life ever since you returned to the countryside shifted into something more precious than you imagined. From moving places constantly, you found a home to settle in for good. A home with overflowing love and inspiration. A home within Jeong Jaehyun.

Recently, you halted your work-related activities in Paris and came home because you were heavily homesick. It even affected your health as a whole. So you made adjustments with your schedules, postponing appearances to events to next year.

On the plus side, you could be more active as a mother to Adrien. It felt like you burdened Jaehyun to take care of Adrien most of the time because he mainly worked from home, wherein important people who wanted to meet him would have to fly out to the countryside.

Back and forth to Paris, your presence towards Adrien often lacked. Here came your biggest fear, which was Adrien forgetting you. But Jaehyun told you over and over again that it wasn’t the case. As he listened to every wrenching thought you had, but he’d combat it with heartfelt words of reassurance so you wouldn’t overanalyze things.

He vowed to love and take care of you when times get hard, and he will continue doing so.

Remember when you said how his mansion felt too big?

It no longer did after getting married.

It gave more room to grow and breathe more life into it. When Adrien was born, he was the prime reflection of your and Jaehyun’s love. He mirrored his father’s physical traits but with a daring personality like yours. A perfect mixture, the world worked amazingly to bring a boy like him into your life.

“Maman! Papa!” Adrien bolted to where you and Jaehyun stood. From the clothes he wore, it’s very much clear that his father was in charge of it whilst you slept in the entire morning. Suspenders, capri shorts, a white shirt, and a red beret, he deserved his title as Jaehyun’s mini-me.

Jaehyun swelled with pride and love for his only son, peeking over what he brought to show and tell you both. “Oh Adrien, what do you have for us today?”

In his basket, there were 3 sunflowers stuck out from the edge. It’s been a while since you’ve seen some in full bloom, lowering your stance to get a more vivid view. He took them out to hand them to you and your husband.

One flower for Jaehyun and two for you. You let out a gasp, scrunching your brows to the center. He always gave one of each item to you and Jaehyun, never more or less.

“Ooh, deux fleurs pour Maman. Pourquoi, Rien?” (Ooh, two flowers for Mama. Why, Rien?) Jaehyun let his nickname out for his lips while you grasped his small hand.

“Well, I heard from Olivier next door that on his birthday, he gave extra flowers to his mother so he could have another sibling. And it worked!” He spoke so innocently, yet it hitched a choke from Jaehyun’s chest. Your eyes widened from disbelief. The information he collected due to his curiosity, no boundaries truly.

“Le mois prochain, c’est mon anniversaire. Je me demandais si je peux avoir un frère ou sœur comme Olivier? Tu es toujours occupée, comme Papa. Je ne veux plus être seul, alors je veux une amie aussi.” (It’s my birthday next month, and I was wondering if I can have a sibling like Olivier? You are always busy, like Papa. I don’t want to be alone anymore, so I want a friend too.)

You exchanged looks with Jaehyun, not knowing how exactly to respond. Although you and Jaehyun did agree that you wanted more than one child when you were younger, neither of you brought it up again since your careers were always loaded with plans.

Adrien was a surprise child actually, conceived on the night where you and Jaehyun celebrated after L’Été de 1957 was announced to be the best-selling romance novel of the decade in the country.

In Paris at his family home, where his parents brought out all their prized liquor, the two of you drank the entire night away to the point Krystal and Donghyun had to push you away from each other from your public affections because their children were present.

But it didn’t stop you two once you reached his bedroom, far away from everything and everyone. And you’ll never change it.

“Oh, Rien,” You eased in, consoling him. “Je suis désolé. Mais c’est franchement une grande demande, n'est-ce pas?” (I am sorry. But that’s quite a big request, right?)

“Mom and I will think about it first, okay? Another kid is a big responsibility, and you’ll be their older brother. That’s another important job, can you do it well?”

“Yes, I can, Papa!” He beamed with glee, his covered head patted by his father after. As you placed the sunflowers beside your palette, Adrien then proceeded to ask you if he could paint with you like old times.

Never you refuse especially with his sparkling round eyes and chubby face that makes you want to squish every time.

As you lifted his light body to sit on your lap, you placed your brush between his stubby fingers and carefully aimed in whatever angle seemed fit so the painting process would run smoothly and perfectly. He let out sounds of amazement when the strokes get bigger, jumping slightly too because the picture became more vivid. You’d smile and coo at him, commending whenever he followed instructions well. As his mother, you only encouraged your child in whatever they want to excel in.

Adrien was the child of two artists, so it was only natural that he had an artistic side in his veins.

Too caught up in your fun, hearing the automatic shutter of the camera from your side was delayed. The source was none other than Jaehyun hiding behind his camera. Jaehyun’s heart soared at the heavenly view of the most important people in his life, wanting to treasure the moment as a lovely memory.

“Hey!” You shouted, placing down the messy brush by the palette. “Je suis très laid!” (I am very ugly!)

“Shh! Tu est rayonnant, ma chérie. Papa est juste, Rien?” (Shh! You are glowing, my darling. Papa is right, Rien?)

Jaehyun politely quizzed the peppy boy, nodding excitedly. His dimples deeply showed up, the main trait he claimed from his father.

“Oui, papa! Maman est toujours belle!” (Yes, papa! Mama is always beautiful!)

He exclaimed, pecking your cheek numerously. You squealed, attacking him with tickles and kisses back. His shouts of delight, then he was suddenly carried by your tall husband in the air like he was flying in the sky. Adrien enjoyed that motion highly, ending up on Jaehyun’s shoulders shortly after to play by the garden again.

“Go paint. I’ll take care of him now.” Jaehyun persuaded, roaming through the long rows of flowers in full bloom. Though seconds after adding some strokes to your piece, you let down your hair, put a hat and sandals on, and ran to the cute duo to join them.

And that’s how your family spent the entire afternoon. By the garden, running around and taking photos and short videos from Jaehyun’s camera. Freezing these valuable memories, this was truly the life you loved so much.

After your break, you could convince the company you worked at that you’d prefer fewer trips to Paris and stay in the countryside longer. How badly you’ve wanted to hold your exhibits here instead. Plus like Jaehyun, let influential people visit you. You’ve already made a big name for yourself now, so that should be valid enough.

Dinner time passed by quickly too, eventually putting Adrien to a smooth slumber as you massaged the roots of his soft hair while Jaehyun sang him a lullaby. This was your joint parenting technique with him since he was a newborn, and it worked quickly as lightning.

You redressed into your silk nightgown after bringing your canvas to the master bedroom, opening the balcony doors to invite the cool breeze in. You tweaked some bits of your painting, including a silhouette of your small family. Regarding where to place it, probably by the living room as it matched the theme.

“What a spectacular day, don’t you think, ma chérie?” Jaehyun conversed, admiring the calm movements of your brush. He noticed a quirky smile grace your lips.

“It’s been a long time since we had quality time like that with Rien. He’s a feisty ball of energy these days.” You replied with a nostalgic daze. “It’s so crazy how one day, he was still crawling to us. Now, he could outrun the both of us.”

“Comme le temps passe vite, hmm?” (How time flies fast, hmm?) Nodding, nothing braced for what your husband had in mind. You almost dropped your brush mid-way. Jaehyun’s lips impatiently devoured your neck, his huge hands fondling your breasts. Violently throwing your head back against his chest, a needy moan parted your lips.

“Jae-” His touches reaching south to where you desired him highly, dampening hastily as your legs naturally spread apart. Rushed exhales, “À quoi tu penses maintenant?” (What are you thinking about right now?)

“Rien se sent seul,” (Rien feels alone,) His hot breath whispered against your ear, his fingers dangerously trailing your thin panties up and down. With your hands tightly clutching on his bicep,

“Alors, donnons-lui une amie.” (We should give him a friend.)

Ever since Adrien mentioned such a daring topic, it hasn’t left Jaehyun’s mind the whole day. After seeing you in utter bliss with your son earlier, he found you so majestic and radiant. It’s a different kind of happiness, especially for parents.

Now you went on hiatus, he thought that it was the right time to have another. He enjoyed his younger years with Krystal, and he wanted Adrien to experience it too. 3 years was quite a wait, and it seemed ideal to try again.

From his nude chest, you flipped around to intensely clash his lips with yours. Draping your arms behind his neck, Jaehyun lifted your entire figure from the chair. His hands gripping on your butt, he delicately lowered you down your bed.

Drowning into his sensual kisses with his hands all over you, this could prolong for hours. Reddening love marks started to resurface whilst your fingers tugged on the drawstring of his pajama pants. Jaehyun’s fingers dove under the fabric of your panties, his index finger rubbing figure 8s the sensitive bundle of nerves.

You struggled to swallow your moans, not wanting Rien to hear it. You wouldn’t want to repeat history, covering it as Jaehyun massaging you after a hard day.

“I know you want one too, ma chérie.” His fingers began to drape down the straps of your gown, presenting your breasts in its full, perky view. But before his lips could suck on your erect nipples, you parted momentarily from him and got up on your feet. Pulling up your straps again, Jaehyun simply laid down but he wasn’t pleased from how you left him hanging.

“Où vas-tu, ma chérie?” (Where are you going, sweetheart?)

He was growing impatient. You were never to interrupt such a sexy atmosphere ever.

From one of your drawers in your vanity table, an important, half-opened envelope was hidden. You were supposed to give it tomorrow but now seemed like a perfect time. Reading it as soon one of the maids handed it to you gave you the jitters, but in a positive way. Sitting back down on the edge of your bed, you exhilaratingly passed it to your husband.

“Qu’est-ce que c’est?” (What is this?)

“Ouvre-le.” (Open it.)

Jaehyun slowly opened the edges and once he took out the contents. Reading it thoroughly, he couldn’t believe it as his jaw dropped, pacing from the letter and you back and forth.

“Vraiment, ma chérie?” (Really, my darling?)

It was from a doctor you visited in Paris a few days before you left, who confirmed just exactly what caused your health to go feeble suddenly. You already had one certain suspicion, which you addressed in your leave of absence letter. Amelié, who finally got the position as the head, couldn’t believe her ears and insisted you take all the time off you needed.

“On dirait que Adrien a reçu son cadeau d'anniversaire en avance.” (It looks like Adrien received his birthday gift early.)

Overall, it turned out the headaches and repeated vomiting you mistook as motion sickness from traveling was a surprise hello to your second child.

A girl specifically, thanks to the blood test she recommended.

“Je t’aime, (Y/N).”

“Montre moi combien tu m’aimes, Jaehyun.” (Show me how much you love me, Jaehyun.)

The whole night through, the two of you vigorously celebrated with the moonlight from the windows and a few scented candles set in the room. Wet kisses left on your collarbone, words of devotion exchanged, holding his hand as he groaned from heartily thrusting in you, the number of moans from your lips overlapped with the vinyl playing in the room. The intimacy between you two increased, almost as if you made love for the first time again all those years ago.

Excluding being drenched from the rain.

Once the two of you grew tired, Jaehyun lied down beside you. Wrapping one arm around, one hand trailed down your naked skin again. His wedding band flashed your eyes, reminding you of the commitment you promised each other. For better, and for worse.

Jaehyun promised to love you endlessly as a woman and his wife, and it didn’t cease when you became the mother of his children. He respected how strong you are, physically and mentally. He helped you in any way he could as you endured the struggling process.

At the end of the day, his family was his biggest priority. More than ever now, you needed him as you go through the pregnancy phases again. Specifically, his index finger lingered on your stomach. There was no bump or other signs of showing, except for that glow he complimented you earlier on.

“We met and fell in love over the summer, got married in summer, had Adrien mid-summer, and now found out about our daughter at the start of summer.” He smiled, blessed at all the good he’s received during this time.

“The summer gods must adore us.” Your vacant hand with your wedding band topped his. To love and to cherish. “Ils m'ont amené à toi.” (They brought me to you.)

His power on you was simply addicting, as if your early twenties revisited you. You straddled himself once again, your fingers caressing his face sweetly. When it reached his lips, he placed longing kisses there and pulled you closer again for another kiss on your lips. In between, you mumbled in a silvery tone,

“Then they led us to say I do. Pour toujours et à jamais.”

copyright © 2021 by alluringjae.

[nostalgicatsea]

Steve/Tony modern AU mood board for @thedamageofherdays​ | @fandomtrumpshate​​ 2022

Thank you for bidding on me and donating to Dig Deep/Navajo Water Project, Damage! 

ON AO3

THE NIGHT BEFORE

“Blue Steel’s right. If you’re going to make a bad decision, let me be your bad decision. Don’t text your ex.”

Copious amounts of alcohol because you were set on breaking hearts tonight, but his is already broken and you find yourself wanting to pick up the pieces instead of grinding them under your foot. You both need liquid courage; you to go through with your offer, him to take you up on it.

Deli sandwiches at Katz’s to soak up the drinks. There are too many goddamn people (of course there are), but you were craving a Reuben and it was nearby so it was worth the crowd. You sketch DUM-E on a napkin—DUM-E shaking smoothie ingredients everywhere and everything splatting on the floor, specifically—because he asks what your baby looks like. You’re not sure why you’re letting him know these things about you, but he carefully slips the napkin from the table and into his jacket pocket when you leave.

A late-night film screening at Nitehawk. You don’t even know how you got from the Lower East Side to Brooklyn. You don’t know where in Brooklyn because you don’t go to Brooklyn. But you see the theater’s charm and you see his charm when he lets you steal all his tater tots. 

Inadvisable amounts of alcohol again. The bars and hours have blurred. At some point, you reach over and comb his hair back because a lock’s come loose and he leans in to kiss you on the cheek, right by the corner of your lips. It’s sweet, but you catch him before he can move away, angling your mouth so that it’s finally on his. He forgets what he was saying. You tell him that’s the plan except you make no move to drag him to the bathroom. 

A cab ride you don’t remember but you pay for, after he wakes you up with a kiss on your forehead, then your hair, not fussed at all that you passed out on his shoulder the entire ride. It’s driving you more than a little crazy that he keeps aiming everywhere but your lips. You stand on tiptoes and bite his earlobe, then the muscle that jumps in his neck, once the cabbie pulls away from the curb. He crowds you against a brick wall, right there where anybody can see you both, and returns the favor two-fold. 

Greasy slices at the pizzeria around the corner from his apartment to sober up because he hasn’t gone grocery shopping yet. Some guy behind the counter named Clint wolf whistles when you walk in, tucked under his arm because it’s late enough that it’s cold as hell even though it’s May and he noticed you shivering. His ears flush a cute red. You discover the rest of him does too, thirty minutes later.

THE MORNING AFTER 

“I saw the note you left on the fridge, and I got to thinking about what you said last night. You were the right decision. That’s why I’m calling you.”

An empty, sleep-rumpled bed. He’s in the kitchen helping himself to your coffee because you woke him up at what he deemed an ungodly hour when you went to go wash. You can still see the imprint of his body on top of your blanket, where he dozed off some more after his first attempt to get up. 

Hangover bacon, egg, and cheese that you pay for because he covered the cab fare when you secretly were too tired to take the long train ride home after the movie. You didn’t want to deal with weekend MTA bullshit, but you also didn’t have enough spare cash and somehow he knew. Kamala’s at the bodega, buying what looks like ten bags of chips, and he instantly wins her over by chatting about some show they both like, matching her enthusiasm and nerd knowledge. She goes bug-eyed at you when she thinks he’s not looking, her telepathic exclamation points plonking down on your head.

The early morning view of the city skyline. You’re surprised that he stuck around after breakfast, but he doesn’t seem to want whatever this is to end either. He helps unload your supplies from the car before you can even object. You both need to cool down after lugging everything up three flights of stairs to your studio so you take him to the rooftop. Contentment radiates from him, hazy and warm like the Brooklyn sky.

A tour around your studio that makes you feel shy because it’s bare bones until you notice he doesn’t care. He’s too busy looking at your work with wonder, like you make him see the world differently. 

Brushes you introduce him to along with your stack of pencils because you’ve seen what he can do with a pen. The evidence of it is sitting on your bedside table at home. You lose hours with him, both of you filling the room with dreams that didn’t exist before your time with each other. 

A ride back to the city because that’s where he lives. You hate and usually avoid two-seater benches because you’re either sandwiching someone or being sandwiched by someone and there’s no room for your legs. It’s kind of stupid how happy it makes you that you’re crammed in one with him. He’s pressed against your side, and it’s enough and not nearly enough.   

A row boat out on the water at Central Park. Somehow, even though both of you have lived here all your lives—or maybe because you have since you’re pretty sure this counts as touristy—you’ve never done this before. Everything is new with him. You’ve made what were supposed to be endings—a one-night stand yesterday, numerous chances to part ways today–into beginnings. You feel that way about him when you get back home hours later and see the note he must have written right when the day started, before he handed you your coffee and told you good morning, sunshine.

[soramei]

Intentional - Part 4

Pairing: Bang Chan x Reader (she/her)

Summary: Landing your first real job at JYPE was something short of a miracle. You were prepared to face the new struggles of this elusive career whilst moving to a new country, however, nothing could have prepared you for him. Will stolen glances, secret touches, and hushed nights spent in the recording room ever be enough for the both of you?

Genre: idol!bang chan au, forbidden relationship, coworkers to eventual lovers, slow burn

Warnings: none right now, eventual smut

Word Count: 3.4k

Masterlist

A/N: DOUBLE UPLOAD! So i decided to split this part in two since i didn't want it to drag on for too long... next part will be uploaded tomorrow!

Taglist (reply to be tagged!): @planetdemon​ @hvunvely​ @fluffybitch0325​ @fashi0nablee @juststop88

You picked up the lanyard, looking between your burnt jacket in one hand and the vandalized piece of plastic in the other. The burnt polyester felt rough against your fingers. It was littered with black holes, almost to the point where it was unrecognizable as your jacket.

The lanyard, on the other hand, was almost untouched — save for the black marker that was sketched on the plastic. In the picture, on the part where your upper body was showing, there was only the black marker. The black blob stretched across your torso, the shape depicting a hoodie. Your eyes landed on the eyes in your picture. Thick lines drawn in the shape of an X covered both of them.

You quickly entered your apartment, hoping nobody saw you. You then stood completely still, listening to the silence, trying to find if anybody had broken into your home. After a minute, when it seemed as if you were the only person in there, you decided to lay the two vandalized items on your desk to further analyze them.

Your brain immediately tried to play this down by assuming that these were just kids who did this to your stuff, after all, it was something very immature. Children were the only people who had the time to play with fire and draw on other people’s pictures.

However, your gut told you something different. Why was your jacket along with your lanyard placed right in front of your apartment? Why was the marker outline specifically in the shape of a hoodie? Who could have known you were in the parking lot at that time of day?

Your mind drifted to one specific person. Manager Kim. He not only saw that you were in the parking lot that day with that jacket on, but also he knew your face from the lanyard. But why would he do something this childish? And how did he know where you lived?

The parking lot security guard had also been there when you wore that jacket, but he didn’t even look at you. And he would have no motive to do this sort of thing.

You rubbed your chin in thought, still not understanding everything. Was there somebody else that knew you were there?

Still feeling anxious, you began to prepare a cup of tea. You were reminded of Bang Chan. The tea. The smell of his hoodie.

His hoodie. The black hoodie.

Realization hit you like a truck as your eyes widened in disbelief. Was it maybe… Bang Chan?

Your heart was beating out of your chest. Hands shaking, you picked up your phone to call him, silently begging for the mysterious person to not be him.

He picked up.

“Hello? Y/n?”

You stayed silent.

“Is there something wrong?” He asked.

“I… I lost my jacket and it had my lanyard in it,” you tried to be careful with your words, not wanting to rouse suspicion from him, “have you seen it anywhere?”

“No,” you could almost see Bang Chan furrowing his eyebrows, “I’m still in the building though. I could look for it?”

“That’s alright,” you sighed in relief. He genuinely sounded confused, and plus, he was always so nice — there was no way he would ever do this kind of thing to you. You felt guilty for even suspecting him. “Thanks for offering though.”

“Y/n.”

“Hmm?”

“I know I said this before, but,” he paused, “if you need help with anything I’ll be there. I mean it.”

A chill ran down your spine at the seriousness of his voice. “I know. Thanks.”

You hung up, uneasy. The problem was unsolved, and to be honest, you were a little scared. There was somebody that knew who you were and where you lived. It was probably a good idea to change the passcode to your lock.

The kettle started to whistle. You turned off the flame of your stove and poured yourself a cup of tea, hoping that it would calm you down. Although it did a little, you still felt apprehensive about the whole thing. Your mood stayed the same the whole night, even when you tried to scroll through your phone or go to sleep.

The next day, you woke up with your mind cleared. No longer were you still feeling the aftershocks of the creepy jacket burner, and with your mood lifted more, you felt like you could think more objectively.

And that’s exactly what you did.

Throughout your whole week, this incident stuck in the back of your mind. Although your memory was getting fuzzier and fuzzier with the passing days, you still tried to work out who the culprit was in your free time.

Your mind was also filled with something else. Or was it someone else?

It seemed like, during the whole week, you couldn’t stop thinking of Bang Chan. You had to put part of the blame on him, though. Everytime he had a free moment in his busy schedule — granted it was rare that he did — he wanted to see you.

From secretly bringing you snacks from the vending machine to summoning you to his recording room in order to show his newest creation, he always seemed to stay busy even in his free time. You weren’t complaining, though. It was nice to have a friend who was so different from what you were used to.

You also spent a lot of time with Na-eun too. However, the time you spent with her felt different. Not in any good or bad way, just different. With her, it was mainly in the cafeteria, raving over the food after finally finding a free table. It was also trying to talk over everybody in the crowded streets as you two went shopping after work.

You liked it, sure. But with Bang Chan, every moment felt more intimate. Every smile, every laugh or brush of the hand. Was this what becoming friends felt like?

Other than these intrusive thoughts, the rest of your time was taken up by work. Although you were starting to get the hang of your tasks, there were still many mistakes made. Mistakes in which you had to profusely apologize to Manager Chen for, that you had to stay late nights to fix, mistakes which made you almost lose your mind. You hoped that Manager Chen could see your dedication to not only this project, but your job as a whole.

In the duration of this week, you managed to check in with every department involved with the project and partake in the finalization of the Mid-Autumn Festival content idea. It was decided that the group would do three activities: make lanterns, bake mooncakes, and share a fire while watching the moon. All while in the mountains.

You were surprised when Manager Chen asked you to come along to the shooting despite your inexperience. However, it wasn’t a chance you were going to pass up.

The week was hectic. So hectic, that you didn’t even realize it was almost over until Na-eun brought it up.

“Ugh, I wish I could just steal a whole tray of this food home,” you rolled your eyes. The two of you were raving once again at the cafeteria food. You wished you actually knew how to cook.

“Can you not cook?” She asked.

“I can fry an egg,” you said, stuffing more rice in your mouth.

“My six year old niece can do that,” she laughed. Her eyes widened. “What if I come over tonight and teach you? We’ll make fried rice, even you can’t screw that up.”

“Ha,” you said dryly. “I would, but I have literally nothing in my fridge.”

Na-eun gave you a deadpan look.

“How were you able to stay alive for the past couple weeks? At least you got skinner.” She sneered. “We’ll stop by the grocery store after work, I’ll teach you the bare minimum of living alone.”

And that was exactly what the two of you did. Right after you clocked out of work, you met up with Na-eun to go shopping. You decided to take out some cash to pay for your groceries, an action that Na-eun found hilarious. She was almost crying as she explained that a few groceries didn’t cost as much as you thought.

Your trip was successful. The two of you made it all the way back to your apartment and didn’t waste a second to get started. Halfway through setting things up, Na-eun got a text.

“Hey, is it okay if Yoojin comes? I guess she got jealous that I was here with you and she wasn’t.” She chuckled.

“Of course,” you eagerly nodded. “But, wouldn’t it be hard to get here with her injury?”

“What injury?”

“You know,” you continued, “her ankle.”

“She seemed fine to me.” Na-eun said as she started on the rice.

“Maybe she healed fast.” You shrugged.

“Maybe,” she shrugged back and returned to her task.

You texted Yoojin your address, and it wasn’t long before she was knocking at your door. You opened your door, and she immediately leaped at you for a hug.

“Oh, Y/n! I’m still so sorry for that day, I honestly feel horrible.” She pouted, her big eyes staring at you for a response.

“It’s really nothing, Yoojin.” You tried to sound casual. You let her in your apartment. “But, doesn’t your ankle hurt? There’s a lot of stairs coming up.”

“Oh, uhm, the doctor said it was only a minor injury.” She paused. “And I heal fast.”

“That’s good,” you smiled, patting her shoulder.

“But I still feel so bad, Y/n.” She whined. “Lemme make it up to you. I’ll set you up with this really hot guy I know. He’s a law student. You don’t have a boyfriend, do you?”

“Kim Yoojin!” Na-eun yelled.

“How about it? You’re free tomorrow, right?” Yoojin looked at you, ignoring Na-eun.

“I guess so,” you hesitantly agreed, “since it’s the weekend tomorrow.”

“Great!” Yoojin wrapped her arms around you, jumping up and down. “I’ll text you everything tonight.”

Yoojin kept up with her promise. After the three of you stuffed yourselves with good food, your two friends decided to leave before it got too dark. It was just a bit later when Yoojin’s text came through. You were to have dinner with this man called Kang Taehyun at an Italian restaurant tomorrow. Although you weren’t too thrilled with the idea of eating pasta, you figured you could withstand it for one night on the basis of trying something new.

You didn’t know how you felt about going on this date. Although you were excited to meet somebody new, something just felt off. Plus, you’ve never been on a blind date before. Who knows how good Yoojin’s judge of character was, or if this guy was like anything that Yoojin described.

You sighed, putting those thoughts aside. It was just a one time thing anyways, and who knows? Maybe this could lead to something. You looked over at Bang Chan’s hoodie. His warm hoodie that smelled so much like him. You should return it soon.

It was almost like he read your mind. As soon as you looked away, your phone rang with a call from Bang Chan.

“Hello?” You picked up.

“Hey, did you find your jacket?” He asked. You were surprised he still remembered.

“No… not yet.” You drifted off.

“Oh. We’ll keep looking for it, yeah? I’ll just buy you a new one if you can’t find it.”

You giggled. A couple seconds of silence passed.

“My shoot ends at six tomorrow. Wanna go to that barbecue place I was talking about?” He asked.

That’s right. Bang Chan couldn’t stop raving about that barbecue restaurant the whole week. He was really excited as his diet would end when he was done with his photoshoot, and he was apparently craving meat the whole time. All his praise made you very eager to see what the hype was all about.

You were about to eagerly accept, but then you remembered the date you had just planned not even a moment earlier. “Can we go another time? I… kinda have a blind date tomorrow.”

A few more seconds passed before you heard Bang Chan’s voice again.

“Blind date?”

“Yeah, my friend set it up. We’re going to this Italian place. Apparently he’s a really nice and handsome guy. He’s a law student, too.”

“Wha- law student? Y/n, are you sure you should be going on a blind date now? I mean, you just got here. You don’t know the city that well and you don’t even like pasta. What if he’s dangerous?” Bang Chan scoffed, his words got faster with each sentence.

“Chan, it’s okay. You don’t need to worry, I’ll be safe. Plus, I trust my friend.”

“You mean your friend you only just met?”

Silence.

“I only just met you as well.” You spat, slightly insulted that he would speak like that about Yoojin.

There was more silence that lingered.

“Whatever. Have fun on your date.” Bang Chan spat back, his harsh tone matching yours. Right after he said that, he hung up.

You looked angrily at your phone. Frowning, you threw your phone on your bed. Who was he to get angry at you for having a blind date? You recognized the dangers of meeting somebody new, but you trusted Yoojin. You were confident that Yoojin was honest about Taehyun.

A boyfriend would be nice too. Ever since your last relationship early in your university career, you haven’t had the best luck with men. It could have been because of how closed off your old friend group was. Your friends stayed consistent ever since you were young, and it was way too awkward to date a friend. You also found yourself way too closed off to go out and meet any new people.

Yes, tomorrow would be a good experience, you told yourself.

The next day, the hours leading up to your date felt like they had passed way too fast. The call with Bang Chan from last night still lingered on your tongue like sour candy, but you were determined to push past that in order to get ready on your date. After all, you didn’t want any frown lines to show.

You were excited to get ready. The amount of time it took to do both your hair and makeup was embarrassingly long, as you wanted everything to look just right for tonight. You didn’t want a hair to be out of place. You also took your sweet time to pick an outfit. Although the skirt you picked out probably wasn’t fit for the fall weather, you stuck with it anyways, choosing to layer a jacket over your outfit. One of your non-burnt jackets.

Double checking yourself in the mirror one last time, you locked the door and headed out. The streets were busy tonight. They were filled with people of all ages trying to relax from their tiring week.

Finding the restaurant wasn’t a hassle as the place was conveniently located at one of the busiest streets for weekend night-life. Dim yellow lights illuminated the tall glass windows just enough for you to see just the shadows of people enjoying their Saturday night. Green vines wrapped around the building, twirling and twisting their way around every crevice available. You tried not to fiddle with your thumbs as you nervously entered the lavish looking Italian restaurant.

“Hello, table for Kang Taehyun?” You asked the hostess. She showed you to a little table right beside a window. It was illuminated by a single candle, and already had two glasses of wine placed on it. And sitting at the table, hands crossed in front of him, was a hideously gorgeous man.

He looked like something out of a drama, really. With his tall nose and his sharp jaw, you struggled to convince yourself that this was a real man. His hands looked twice the size of yours.

“Hi, Y/n?” He asked. “I’m Kang Taehyun.”

He smiled and gestured for you to sit in the empty chair in front of him. You politely greeted him back and sat down. The two of you made some small talk before ordering. He made some suggestions on what to order, but you didn’t really care. You knew you wouldn’t like any of the pastas anyway. Plus, you swore to yourself you wouldn’t be drinking alcohol in front of strangers again.

“I’m surprised you agreed to this date.” You said, awkwardly laughing. “Isn’t a law student supposed to be really busy, especially around this time?”

“Well, I’m mainly doing this as a favour for Yoojin. She helped me with one of my classes.” He took a swig of his wine. “That girl is crazy smart. Or should I say crazy, but smart?”

“Oh?” You didn't want to admit that you were a bit disappointed he only agreed because of a favour. But he was being honest, so that was fair. What he said about Yoojin, though, took you by surprise.

“I’ve only heard rumors,” he tilted his head, “but some say that once in first year she went crazy over a guy. Started stalking him and everything. Apparently she even burned all his textbooks just because he started talking to another girl. They weren’t even dating.”

Your eyes widened at the allegations. There was no way any of that was true. You couldn’t imagine Yoojin — sweet, sweet Yoojin — to be capable of anything like that. There was no way her big puppy dog eyes and her fluffy hair could hurt a soul.

“Are you sure that’s what happened?” You asked.

“I mean, the guy was put into a mental hospital shortly after everything happened,” he shrugged, “so who knows? Maybe he made everything up in his head.”

“Yeah, maybe.” You nodded your head in agreement. Some of your hair fell on your pasta. You blushed, quickly trying to dab the sauce away using a napkin.

“You know Y/n,” Taehyun chuckled, “you’re cute. You’re not my type. I mean, I’ve only ever dated models before, but maybe it’s time to start settling down since I’ll be working at the firm soon.”

Thanks, I guess? You thought. You honestly didn’t know if that was a compliment or a jab, but either way you felt slightly insulted. You didn’t know how to reply to that, but it didn’t take long before Taehyun started again.

“I mean, look at my ex,” he said as he pulled up a picture of his ex-girlfriend on Instagram. She looked flawless in her bikini. “There’s no way I could actually marry somebody like that, right?”

If he says ‘I mean’ one more time… You thought to yourself. This date was turning south fast. This man was extremely handsome — almost god-like — but every word that left his mouth was poison infused arrogance. You didn’t know which was worse: listening to the man in front of you talk about his ex, or eating the pasta that was ordered by him.

You tried your best to stay polite with him for the rest of the evening. It was hard, though, as his cocky personality kept poking you down the whole time. It wasn’t until you finally separated that you had space to breathe. Great, you were left both hungry and annoyed.

Turning the lights on in your home, you sat at the kitchen table, still annoyed over your bad night. You took out your phone, wanting to scroll through the food delivery apps to find something to eat. Your thumbs began drifting.

No, stop. You silently begged yourself. Please, not tonight.

Your body didn’t seem to listen to your mind, however, as your thumb stayed hovering over Bang Chan’s contact. You pleaded to yourself to not press it, but your fingers seemed to have an agenda of their own. You pressed his contact. The phone call started.

One ring. Two rings.

“Hello, Y/n?”

You were shocked. He wasn’t supposed to pick up. Not after how poorly your last conversation went. You didn’t know what to say.

“Chan, how was the photoshoot?” You didn’t know what to say. You didn’t expect him to even pick up.

“It went great — feels good that it’s over, though.” He chuckled.

You wanted to tell him about your date: how arrogant Taehyun was, how fancy the restaurant was, how nasty the pasta was. You wanted to say all that, but tonight it seemed like your body just wouldn’t cooperate with your mind. And sure enough, you caught your mouth running before your mind. But this time, you couldn’t stop yourself.

“Chan,” you took a deep breath, “wanna come over?”

[oyasuminto]

May I request some winter Lawrence hc please.

The rot slows down when it's cold, but then again he's kinda used to the cold because of the dead. On another note, heating is a funky thing to keep all his plants alive (idek what plants he has), also getting a humidifier because it often gets dry in the winter. The electricity bills be a painful time. The ground outside is frozen so if he gonna do anything sketch it would be harder.

Also idk if he gets holidays off for his job, but of it's post-meeting/keeping MC he has someone to spend holidays with so that could be fun. Shopping for regular things could be a bit extra stressful though considering the time of year. I wonder how he reacts to it all. How do you think he would be like?

(Sorry, this is kind of a long ask, and mostly me blabbing, sorry.) ʕ´•̥ ᴥ•̥`ʔ

Winter isn't Lawrence's favorite season, but it's also not his least favorite.

The chill of winter and the finality of death often go hand-in-hand; humans are vulnerable, and many cannot endure the elements. It's a reminder that no-one is invincible, that everything dies.

But the lack of decay distresses him. The snow and ice is amazing at preserving corpses, and Lawrence hates it. It's unnatural.

However, cold weather does wreak havoc on plants. It doesn’t carry the same morbid fascination and admiration that comes with watching flesh detach from a skeletal frame, baring everything to the world in a way that no living being can, but there’s something uniquely beautiful about the way flowers slowly wilt, and Lawrence supposes that the discoloration of their leaves isn’t the worst stand-in for livor mortis.

He absolutely despises the Christmas shopping rush. There’s so many people. Lawrence rarely ever goes grocery shopping—not for perishables, at least—and his nocturnal lifestyle makes it easier to avoid the worst of the crowds.

The bright, blinking lights, endlessly looping music, and artificial trees all get on his nerves and overload his senses. Lawrence can’t even escape the holidays in his own apartment; most of his neighbors have joined in on the festivities, he can hear them laughing and drinking and celebrating.

It reminds Lawrence of his family, of what he used to be before the decay took over his mind and turned him into—

Christmas isn’t a fun time for Lawrence.

He isn’t bothered by the cold, it’s almost comforting, like the cold embrace of death, like the ever-pulling tide of the river.

Lawrence’s mood swings worsen; he can’t work on his project because nothing is decaying properly. As it gets closer and closer to Christmas, police officers begin patrolling the streets in an effort to discourage troublemakers. If Lawrence were to get caught, it’d be during this time.

It’s down to sheer luck that his darkest desires don’t boil over. Well, luck, opiates, and extra visits to the river. Lawrence can’t act on his thoughts if he’s not in the world of the living, right?

But of course, visiting the river only speeds up the deterioration of his mind and body.

If he has a companion, their routine won’t change much, for Lawrence’s sake. At least he’ll have something to occupy him, to keep him distracted from the sick thoughts clawing at his brain.

Lawrence hasn’t had anyone to spend Christmas with in close to a decade, and he doesn’t know how to feel. He doesn’t know if he should feel anything.

If his companion is lucky, Lawrence may return with a gift. Something simple, like a chocolate bar or the skull of a small mammal.