#I haven't watched their live stream yet - will do it in a bit actually

[moonchild-in-blue]

what have been your favorite songs off of clancy so far??? i’ve been so amazed by that album and i wanna hear your thoughts!!

AAAA OKAY. I'm just gonna copy here my ranking from last night after the 1st album listen. Mind you, before yesterday I made a point not to listen to any of the re-release singles and avoided ALL video spoilers, so I went in completely blind .

^ i forgot about Navigating and i put it on the same tier as Midwest

(okay i rambled and this is all jumbled together so - more thoughts under)

I still need to listen to it a few more times today so I can properly rank them but yeah. Routine / Oldies are my top ones for sure, with Backslide / At the Risk / Snap Back falling riiight under. Those three kinda broke me ngl.

Lavish for sure will go up in the ranking because I love it so so much it's SO fun haha.

The Craving I prefer Jenna's version over the single - just different feels. The single version I'd place it with Next Semester.

But yeah, I was sobbing pathetically on Oldies Station, and again on At The Risk lmao. BACKSLIDE!!! BROKE MY HEART!!! NOT EVEN GONNA TALK ABOUT THE VIDEO OTHERWISE!!! WOOOOOOO

Emotional Damage x200

Me and my friend were talking about it, and we both agree that Clancy feels like an amalgamation of every previous album. There is something so heavy and personal about it, very reminiscent of Self Titled, that we haven't seen in a while (since Blurryface I'd say). Not that Trench wasn't personal, but it feels incredibly lore-heavy (aside from Smithereens and The Legend <- i can't listen to it now because yeah. Same thing for me).

Obviously you got Neon Gravestones and Redecorate on SAI (WHICH I LOVE, will take no slander), but yeah.

*Oh and Leave the City - same vibes as Paladin sort of.

Clancy is special. It feels much more intimate. Much more emotionally charged. Trench felt like an album for the fans; SAI is the fun experimental let's go team one. But Clancy 1000% feels like this is for him. Like a letter to past and future versions of Tyler - does this make sense?

Sorry I think I rambled a bit much lol - I might do a proper review or whatever once I gave the album a few more spins but yeah! Right off the bat I am in love with it, if feeling a little too called out by some songs 🥲✌️

But yeah. What about you???? What até your thoughts on the album??? What are you favs????

[lowkeyrobin]

Curious about MCYT with a partner that's usually calm and collected, suddenly being super angry at someone bothering them, maybe almost fighting the person brothering them? (Btw i really love your writing, it's super fun to read!!)

ooooo okay !! I see the vision, hopefully I pulled it off LMAO ; also thank you so much!! that means so much to me, I feel like my writings really corny and dumb sometimes and too boring so thank you, it means a lot to me 🫶🫶🫶

MCYT ; fire in the twilight

includes ; tommyinnit, ranboo, badlinu, nihachu, & quackity

warnings ; language, talk about SA/perverts/men being weird

masterlist

TOMMYINNIT

you're a very calm person

but when you get mad you get maddddd

he's surprised you haven't beaten the shit out of him yet

someone was being kinda weird at a meet and greet at vidcon and you were already stressed and overstimulated from taking pictures with everyone and signing merch and youtooz (guys should I try buying the slimecicle plushie? I don't wanna support a bad company but he's so cute :()

someone took a picture of you stretching where your shirt lifted a bit and showed off your midsection

Tommy saw and immediately called them out while you were taking a solo pic w a fan

when you heard him you just froze and nearly yelled

"Hey, please delete that. out of your trash too, seriously"

"Dude, fucking delete that shit. that's not okay, actually."

you end up nearly beating the shit out of the person....

then comes the Twitch apology 😭😭

you nearly went into a spiral explaining that it's never okay to take photos of ppl without them knowing, no matter when or where

he feels really bad for you but you're able to sit down and calm down to your usual self 🫶🫶🫶

RANBOO

you were getting fed up with how people were treating you and them online and just kinda lost it on stream

your chat was filled with assholes wondering where people were and why you hadn't publicly talked to them in over 12 hours and what your plans with everything were etc etc

"Dude, please stop. all of you. for weeks this has been going on, stop putting me and ranboo on these pedestals and expecting shit from us. seriously, it's horrible for both of us and our health. if you wanna see Tubbo or Tommy, go watch them! they're both live right now. Seriously, it's not funny and it's not gonna make us pump out more content and do what you want. we're people too, we get sad and burned out and tired. eventually content creation gets unfun and you won't get what you want. behave yourselves and do better. we don't owe you anything"

ranboo literally tears up a bit because he was watching the stream in the other room and could hear you, and you were visibly tearing up

you could feel your hands shaking and you just kind of ended the stream because you were so worked up and didn't wanna do it anymore

he immediately wrapped you in a hug because you were just so angry

gave you a pillow to punch and left you be for a while

you're usually very calm but your emotions exploded when you were bottling it up too much

they understood that but their heart bled for you after that, especially w all the hate that came from it :/

FREDDIE BADLINU

people were throwing things at you on stage during Tommy's live show

you played it off as jokes and were fine with jt because they were doing it sneakily in a fun way, roses, kandi bracelets, plushies etc, until someone threw their bra at you

"Okay, can we not?" You scrunch your eyebrows, looking into the crowd as you throw the bra back into the crowd. "That's fucked, don't ever do that again, learn event etiquette. never throw your bras on a fucking stage, it's weird and disgusting"

Freddie looks over at you, standing next to Tommy, giving you a "Holy shit are you okay?" look while also looking for the culprit trying to get their bra back

Tommy instantly stopped the show to reprimand the person

meanwhile Freddie was whispering to you to make sure you were okay

you were pissed but put your big kid pants on and continued the show

you apologized on Twitter after the show because you were really loud and kind of humiliated the people but you were justified with the situation

the people (and the girl who owned the bra) apologized and the situation was over

Freddie feels so bad bc you're so calm and laid back but ppl always have to test your limits :(

NIKI NIHACHU

people were filming you two out in public and taking pictures and you kinda lost it that they weren't listening to niki, telling them to kindly stop

"can you stop taking pictures? she's uncomfortable, please stop." you speak in a stern voice

the fans just like stare at you in shock because you're usually very calm and chill and you basically yelled at them (you reprimanded them because one it's the law two you both didn't want to be disturbed on your walk)

you're in a miserable mood the whole way home because yk how twitters gonna act when they see that

you quickly make a statement before any video leaks or anything, addressing the situation and apologizing to the strangers

ppl got ur back tho and showed support considering they were filming you on a nice walk without consent

she feels so bad seeing you get upset about it and feels like it's her fault

lots of reassuring her that it's never her fault and you're always happy to defend her and you don't mind getting a little loud to defend her

ALEX QUACKITY

you got really upset with someone harassing a bunch of creators during the qsmp Brazil meetup

"Dude, leave them alone. they don't want to take a picture with you and they don't owe you anything! you're being creepy to all those women right now, do you not realize that or something?"

you were furious seeing that many on your friends, even while on a trip, couldn't just not be harassed by men

the weirdo scurried off but you were literally this close to fighting the fucker

you were seething dude, like, shaking because you were so astonished someone could actually be that pushy and that much of a dick over a picture

Alex wrapped you in a tight hug and just squeezed you until you calmed down while the poor people who were harassed had reassured you that they were okay and that they appreciated and thanked you for standing up for them

Alex genuinley apologizes because the way you reacted just proved to him that you definitely are calm and laid back but when you got angry, you got angry

he feels so bad because you had to stand up for your friends and watch them be harassed and shit

[lily-fics-11]

I Can See You: Chapter 6 (Ellie Williams, TLOU)

I Can See You

Fic master post here

Also, I kinda cosplayed Ellie if you want to check it out

*Not beta read

Ellie Williams is a player, on and off the lacrosse field. You begin tutoring her so that she can get her grades up and stay on the team. You try to keep things professional, however, your affection is a great motivator. Ellie wouldn't be caught dead with you so you become her secret mission. 

Chapter 6

Your friends are trying to figure out who your mystery girl is while you and Ellie grow closer than ever. Turns out the back of the library isn’t as private as you thought it was…

Word count: 4.4k

CW: *Ellie and reader are both 18*, profanities, sexual innuendo/references, profanities

“I need your help with something,” Ellie informs you after giving you a kiss and plopping down at your usual table in the library. 

“Is it Chem? Your test is on Wednesday, right?”

“Yes, actually, it is. But that’s not what I meant. It’s not school related.”

You are surprised, but try not to show it. You are more than happy to help her with anything she needs, though you haven't gotten past the homework and Dunkin Donuts coffee phase yet. “What is it, El?”

Ellie takes a deep breath and blurts out “I really need you to come to my lacrosse game tomorrow.” 

“Ellie I want to, I really do. But I don’t know how I’m going to pull that off. My friends are going to see my location at a random lacrosse field and think I got kidnapped. If I turn it off they will think I got kidnapped. I guess I could just leave my phone at home…” you trail off, racking your brains for an answer. 

Ellie cracks a smile. “This game is at North. You told your friends you are seeing a girl who goes to North. Why can’t she be a lacrosse player?”

Your face lights up. “Ellie, you are brilliant!”

“Yeah, I am,” she responds, a smug grin on her face. 

You throw your arms around Ellie and give her a kiss. “I’m excited to watch you play live, instead of on some grainy live stream.”

“I do look way better in person. The camera doesn’t really capture how good my ass looks in those shorts.” Unserious Ellie is ridiculously endearing. 

You laugh, still holding on to her, unwilling to let go yet. Ellie starts to kiss your neck and the pace of your breathing picks up. She keeps nipping at your neck, leaving you humming with satisfaction. 

Out of nowhere, you hear voices, very close by. You are both startled, having been lost in the heat of the moment. Quickly separating from each other, you and Ellie try to act natural. 

Two boys walk past and start scanning the book shelf to your left. You turn to look and Ellie’s eyes widen. 

“Turn the other way,” Ellie says under her breath. 

You look back at her in confusion.

“Your neck,” she whispers.

Ellie had been kissing your neck moments earlier, she must have left some evidence behind. 

“Fuck!” You hiss and whip your head in the other direction. You fiddle with the hood of your sweatshirt so that it’s covering the spot that is missing Ellie’s warm lips. 

Neither of you even had any work out, it looks like you are just hanging out in the library. Which wouldn’t usually matter, but the two of you don’t want to be seen together yet. 

Thankfully, the two boys are most likely freshmen, who probably don’t care about girls' lacrosse. They probably don’t know who Ellie is and there isn’t any reason someone would recognize you when you don’t recognize them. That’s a bit of a relief. 

The boys don’t take too long and you can finally stop holding your breath.

“Those were freshmen, right? They wouldn’t know who we are?” Ellie asks, the tone of her voice quite grave. 

You reassure Ellie, but also yourself. “I doubt they know who we are. We should be fine.” 

“Okay good.” Ellie takes your hand and rubs her thumb over your palm. 

“I don’t know that this is a good spot anymore,” you mumble.

She puts her hands in her pocket with pain in her eyes. “I can’t believe it. No one comes in here after school, especially not this section.”

“Not for books,” you correct her.

Ellie’s freckled nose scrunches up. “What does that mean?”

“You’ve never hooked up in the library?” You question, having assumed that someone with Ellie’s track record had done it before. 

Her jaw drops and her green eyes are horror struck. “Why would I? Have… have you?!?”

“Uh yeah…” you scratch the back of your neck. 

“Who did you… never mind. I don’t want to know. Just for the record, I prefer the back of the locker room,” Ellie huffs. She seems to be displeased thinking about you hooking up with another girl. “But the library suits you better.” The two of you start laughing, too amused by your own stereotypes to stay jealous. 

You bow your head formally. “Why thank you, ma’am.” When you look back up at her it’s time to be serious. “We can stay here today, but we have to figure out a different spot for Thursday.”

“We need somewhere private,” Ellie agrees. 

“I have access to the chem lab for tutoring, my ID can get us in.”

“You tutor someone else in chem?!?” Ellie crosses her arms with an enormous amount of sass. 

“Ellie we’ve been over this,” you remind her.

“We have. That doesn’t mean I feel any less betrayed.”

You put a hand on her thigh under the table, if someone were to walk in they wouldn’t be able to see. “You are my favorite person I’ve ever tutored.”

“I better be. And just so you know, since my test is on Wednesday, I won’t have much work to do on Thursday. I don’t know how I’m going to keep myself occupied in a locked classroom with you,” Ellie smirks. 

You smile and shake your head. “That’s a tough one, El. What are you going to do?”

“I’ve got some ideas. But I need to study so you are going to have to wait until then to find out.” 

You continue to avoid PDA the rest of your time in the library, already anxious for the next time you can see each other, before you have even parted ways. 

You sent a selfie in the Snapchat group chat later that night using a filter that tells you which character you are from a show that you and all your friends watch. You hadn’t thought anything of it until you were being bombarded with questions about the hickeys on your neck. 

“They are from the girl that goes to North,” you lie and ignore their questions for the rest of the night. 

The next day at lunch you hear whispers about Ellie Williams in the library after school. She was seen with a girl who, believe it or not, has your hair color and skin tone. That’s crazy. 

Those damn freshmen. 

You: Good luck today!!😘💕

Space Nerd🚀🤓: Having you there is all the luck I need💚🍀

You get to Ellie’s game while the teams are still warming up. Ellie routinely looks at the bleachers as you walk around to the visitors side, searching for you, and a big smile grows on her face when she finally spots you.

The lacrosse spectators look somewhat familiar now that you’ve been to a few games. Joel is amongst them, talking to some of the other dads. It’s impossible to hear what he’s saying from this far away, but you can tell how proud he is of Ellie as he points down at her on the field. 

You watch Joel for a moment. It warms your heart to see someone care so much about Ellie. She’s so special and he cares so much, they way she deserves to be cared about. 

Joel happens to glance in your direction and makes eye contact with you. He gives you a knowing smile and you blush. Joel probably knows you are Ellie’s tutor?

But why would Joel know what Ellie’s tutor looks like? You were in the school paper recently, a picture and blurb about you and the 3 other seniors going to Ivy League Colleges. You are going to Brown.

This recognition leaves you flustered nonetheless. Another person knowing that you are connected to Ellie is overwhelming, though just as thrilling. Although it’s for the best, you don’t always love being a secret. It’s hard not to wish things were easier. 

After shaking off the self conscious feeling that had taken over you, the incessant buzzing of your phone blowing up can no longer be ignored. 

Nicole sent a screenshot of your location in the group chat. You should have expected this, she asked you to hang out and you told her you were busy and didn’t give an explanation. 

Melisssssssa🎤🙈💓: She’s at North👀

Caroline🦋🩵🍭: At the North LACROSSE FIELD👀🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨

Tee-rees-ah💟🎨🐞: Slay pussy boss queen👏🏼

Caroline🦋🩵🍭: Go get your woman!!!!!

NICOLE MY MAIN BITCH👯‍♀️💅👛💓: You do love an athlete

Melisssssssa🎤🙈💓: Jackie’s JV game is right after if you want to stay and watch!!

Caroline🦋🩵🍭: You should break up with her if she doesn’t win 

But that’s just my opinion 

NICOLE MY MAIN BITCH👯‍♀️💅👛💓: Why didn’t you invite us???? 

Do we embarrass you ma’am??  

Tee-rees-ah💟🎨🐞: Yeah we want to watch to

Melisssssssa🎤🙈💓: We want to meet her

NICOLE MY MAIN BITCH👯‍♀️💅👛💓: What is her name 

Melisssssssa🎤🙈💓: What does she look like

Tee-rees-ah💟🎨🐞: What’s her home address

NICOLE MY MAIN BITCH👯‍♀️💅👛💓: What’s her social security number 

Caroline🦋🩵🍭: BRB I’m going to stalk your Instagram following list  

You follow 3 North girls that have something gay in their bio which one is it

NICOLE MY MAIN BITCH👯‍♀️💅👛💓: I’m looking too

 None of them say they play lax:/

Melisssssssa🎤🙈💓: I think it’s the one with 🩷🧡

Tee-rees-ah💟🎨🐞: No it’s gotta be the one committed to UCONN

Caroline🦋🩵🍭: Y’all are wrong it’s gym mirror pic girl 

You: She doesn’t have an Instagram 

NICOLE MY MAIN BITCH👯‍♀️💅👛💓: WTF

Caroline🦋🩵🍭: 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

Tee-rees-ah💟🎨🐞: 😡😡😡😡😡😡 

Melisssssssa🎤🙈💓: We will find her 

Caroline🦋🩵🍭: Looking at the roster now 

The group chat continues to pop off, all theories about who the mystery girl is. You ignore them because the game is starting. 

Ellie is so graceful, yet domineering on the field. The way she plays it is effortless, but also so intentional. Ellie is swift and graceful, poised and confident. She looks at you every time she scores a goal.

You don’t outwardly cheer, just clap when you are supposed to. It’s painful for you not to yell Ellie’s name and jump up and down when she does something good. Unfortunately, you are ‘here for a girl from North’. You doubt anyone is paying any attention, or cares for that matter. However, you are still on a secret mission. 

At one point in the game there is a collision, a defender from your school has to be helped off the field. You can’t tell what was wrong, probably her leg, though not being able to walk on her own could mean a concussion or something. You will have to ask Ellie later and check and see if the girl is ok.  

North played a good game, but not good enough. They weren't as fast or strategic. Between Ellie and Abby, North never stood a chance. 

When the game is over you slip right out. It’s not like you can talk to Ellie anyway, plus you’ve got an essay to revise. 

You: YOU DID GREAT TODAY

KILLED IT

BEST LACROSSE PLAYER I KNOW

A SUPERSTAR

Space Nerd🚀🤓: Thank you for coming:)

It really means so much to me💚

You: I love watching you play💕

Space Nerd🚀🤓: I have to take the bus back to school but can I call you when I’m driving home?

You: Looking forward to it:)

You answer the phone when Ellie calls, proud of her performance out on the field today. “My superstar! Fresh off another win!”

“Well I did have my lucky charm there,” she tried to remind you, deflect from herself. 

“Shhhhhhhh. That was all you, babe,” you assure her, truly meaning it. She doesn’t need any luck. 

“Babe?” Ellie questions and you are unable to gauge her reaction to the use of the pet name from her tone. You wish you could see her facial expression and read her body language right now. 

Fuck. Fuck! FUCK! You really did mess this up, didn’t you. Nice job, valiant effort. But you really screwed up. Goodbye short fling that has changed your life, you will be greatly missed. 

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to, I…” you stutter, fearing you’ve made a grave mistake.

Ellie cuts you off. “I didn’t mean it that way. Not at all. I like it. A lot.” She doesn’t sound as confident as usual, more bashful. 

You are still nervous. This thing between the two of you? You aren’t quite sure that you will ever get used to it. It may never make sense. “So… it’s okay if I call you babe?”

“Yeah,” she responds immediately, making it sound as if it’s something you should have already known. “As long as it’s okay if I call you babe.”

“I think I can make that deal,” you laugh. 

“So what’s up babe?” Ellie asks, giggling. 

“Currently taking an intermission from essay revision.”

“That sounds riveting.” Effortlessly sarcastic, poking fun at you. That excites you, joking around with each other, the playful banter. 

“Hey I was wondering, what happened to that girl that got hurt? The defender that crashed into that tall girl while she was trying to score a goal. Is she okay? She looked like she could hardly walk.”

“Oh fuck! That happened, didn’t it. She dislocated her knee. Knee cap was totally in the wrong spot. Looked like a broken joystick. Super gross. It’s the 3rd time she’s done it so she has to get surgery. She’s out for the season now. At least she is a junior and not a senior.”

“Damn. That really sucks, I feel so bad for her.” You can’t imagine being taken away from something you’ve put so much work into. 

“Same. She’s our best defender too. And she’s the second one to get hurt this season. Now coach has to pull a player up from JV.”

“Hopefully that helps.”

“There is a freshman, actually, who is really good. Coach didn’t pull her up at the beginning of the season because we didn’t need another defender then. Her name is Jackie I think.”

“Jackie Laurent?”

“Yeah. You know her?”

“Jackie is Melissa’s younger sister,” Ellie is silent. “You probably have no idea who that is, do you. Caroline is one of my best friends. I’ve known Jackie since she was a toddler!” You are so proud of her. She’s been on the lacrosse grind for probably 10 years. Always up before everyone else when you slept over so she could go for a run. 

“Well maybe you will have an excuse to come to away games now,” Ellie proposes, her voice higher up in pitch than normal because she is so exhilarated. 

“Shit, you’re right! I’ll make it work,” you promise.

“You don’t even know how happy that makes me, babe.”

“Me too!”

You are both quiet for a moment, just so happy that you have to take a second to appreciate it. You can tell how wired Ellie is, you hear her drumming her hands on the steering wheel. 

“Joel says hi by the way, he saw you at the game,” Ellie informs you. 

That makes you gasp out loud. “Hi?… He said… how does he even know who I am?!?

“Well, I’m not usually so attached to my phone, he started asking questions. I ended up telling him about you. How you are nice, and smart, and beautiful, and amazing. Then he saw that Ivy League article in the school paper,” Ellie explains. “He was impressed. But not as much as he was surprised. Thinks you are out of my league. You know you’re the first girl I’ve ever bothered to tell him anything about?”

“Really?” It’s hard to believe you stand out from the rest, were more worth the conversation. 

“I’ve never really done the relationship thing before,” Ellie admits.

You knew that, knew her reputation, heard all the rumors. “But you could have, every girl at our school loves you.”

Ellie clears her throat. “They love that I’m popular and good in bed. No girl has ever cared to get to know me. They just wanted to say that they did. Casual… it wasn’t what I wanted. What I wanted was to feel wanted.”

You feel your heart breaking. “They all missed out. Big time. I’m so happy I’ve gotten to know you, I’m lucky to have had the opportunity. I care so, so much about you. You are incredibly special, Ellie.”

“You really think so?” Her voice is soft and shy. 

“I know you are. I’ve never met a girl like you before. And I mean that in the best way possible. Being assigned as your tutor is one of the best things that has ever happened to me.”

“Me too. And not just because you saved my grades. You saved me from feeling like I wasn’t good enough.” Her voice cracked on the word ‘good’.

“Ellie…” your chest hurts. You try to find the right words to comfort her but she keeps talking before you manage to string a sentence together. 

“I really mean that. I didn’t think I was worth more than a hookup or being something to show off. That I couldn’t offer anything that wasn’t just physical. But you want me, even though no one knows that you have me. You helped me see what I’ve had inside of me all along.”

You take a sharp breath, trying to keep yourself from getting too emotional. “You are so important to me. You always will be.”

“I don’t think you understand the impact you’ve made on my life.” A subdued confession from Ellie, who is seemingly nervous to reveal this to you. 

“I don’t think you understand the impact you’ve made on my life,” you emphasize, you want Ellie to know how much you value her. 

Ellie pauses for a moment. You aren’t used to her being so quiet, you’re unsure of whether or not you should be nervous. 

“That’s enough being sappy for today,” she sighs. “I’d rather look you in the eyes when I tell you this type of stuff.”

“That’s so sweet,” you like this emotional and vulnerable side of Ellie, getting to see deeper inside of her. 

“So is your face.” Ellie really is slick, isn’t she. Always got a line to pull out of her pocket. 

“Your freckles are sweet and cute,” you point out. 

“Well now I have a bruise on my face from today’s game,” Ellie grumbles. 

How dare someone go anywhere near such a precious beautiful face with such aggression? 

“What?” You practically yell into the phone. “Who did that? I’m going to find them and give them a piece of my mind!” You hear a little “hehe” from Ellie and you don’t appreciate her lack of respect for how much you like looking at her face. 

“Babe,” her voice is soothing to help bring you back down a notch. “We won, isn’t that what really matters?”

You let out a disappointed huff. “I guess.”

Ellie laughs. “Let me handle all the fist fights, okay?”

“No! I’m begging you please don’t get into a fist fight.”

“Begging?” Her voice is lower and more intense than usual. It’s hot. But you do need to get your point across. 

“Ellie please!”

“That’s exactly what I like to hear.” She’s doing her best to try and seduce you. It’s working for sure, but you can’t have her going around fighting people.

Your mouth curved into a frown, trying to think of the best way to get her to listen to you. “I know how to get through to you,” you tell her after a brief pause to collect your thoughts. “Don’t get rough with anyone but me.”

Ellie makes a sound that is almost like a moan. “Well when you put it that way…”

“No more fights?” You question with urgency. She doesn’t need any trouble or injuries. 

“I won’t start any fights,” she promises.

“Always throw the last punch, but never the first.”

Ellie chuckles. “I think you and Joel will get along.”

“I hope so.” You bite your lip. You know how important he is to Ellie, the thought of him not liking you makes you feel sick to your stomach. 

“He’s met other girls… in passing, and let’s just say no one’s ever… made a good impression. Or that he was fond of my, uh, behaviors,” she explains sheepishly. 

You tease her. “I’ve made an honest woman out of you.”

“You really have. I think you are the answer to Joel’s prayers.”

“Truly an angel sent from above,” you joke. 

“Sure look like one.” This girl really is smooth. 

“Why don’t you tell me more about Joel.”

Ellie starts to talk about Joel, her admiration for him present in her tone. She explains that he will be quiet at first. Probably get to know you before he lets you get to know him. He can get along with anyone, he’s a great guy, but he likes his time to himself. Values peace and quiet. She doesn’t explain the history of their relationship. Just that they've been through a lot together, and that she’s going to miss him a lot when she leaves for college. 

You realize you hadn't talked about this yet with her. “Where are you going to college?”

“Boston.”

“Boston College??” You question, that makes the most sense, but also not a lot. 

“Yeah,” Ellie tells you proudly. 

“How did you…” you trail off. You don’t want to offend her, but Boston College is not easy to get into. 

She chuckles. “Get in? Well my grades weren’t always so bad. Not until after I got into college and started fucking around full time. I was a solid B student before that. Don’t get me wrong, my grades weren’t good enough, but my coach is an alumni and had some pull.”

Lacrosse, that checks out. You know Ellie has academic potential, but Boston College has such a low acceptance rate. “So they are good at lacrosse?”

“Last year's national champions,” she states matter of factly, proud of herself. As she should be! 

“Shit. You really are good at lacrosse, aren’t you? I knew you were good, but I had no measure for comparison. It’s like trying to understand the force of an object on another planet. A completely different gravitational constant!”

“I know exactly what you mean babe,” Ellie snickers, and you silently scold yourself for nerding out on her. “When I heard you were going to Brown, I did some research. About an hour drive between us. I didn’t want to say anything right away though and be weird.”

That kills your good mood. Not the research, thinking about the reality of what will happen to the two of you when you leave for college. There isn’t even a label on your relationship yet. You probably won’t even make it to senior prom together because you are keeping things a secret. “You are going to be playing on a D1, nationally ranked team, with girls throwing themselves at you. You’ll forget all about your high school tutor.” Sad, but true. 

“You aren’t just my tutor! You are so much more than that. And even if you were, you are the hottest tutor on the planet. You’ll pull as a tutor, no doubt. But I bet you are going to be a teacher's assistant too, and have entire college lectures full of women in STEM falling for you.” Ellie sounds almost a little… panicked? She’s jealous? Does she really care that much? Is there hope for the two of you?

The overexaggerated implication is very amusing to you. Her jealousy has you feeling a little lighter, it reminded you how much she cares.  “So we both have some competition,” you joke. 

“I will be visiting Brown, and fending those smart girls off with my lacrosse stick if I have to.” There isn't a hint of sarcasm in Ellie’s voice. You can picture it now, her threatening some Ivy League engineering student in her full lacrosse get up. 

“I’ll have some heavy textbooks to bring to your games,” you tell her as seriously as you can, but you can’t say it all without giggling. 

“You are stuck with me now. No other girl is catching my attention. You are my girl. I only want you.” Ellie’s voice is stern, the way a life guard tells you not to dive in the shallow end. Like it’s about safety… maybe it’s about security. 

Your heart flutters, hearing Ellie vocalize her dedication to you. That requires a deep breath to try and settle your racing pulse.  “Good, because I don’t back down from things so easily. Would have been really annoying for you.”

“I much prefer you to go down than back down.” There’s that unserious charm you know and love. 

“I’m sure you would. I’ll make note of that,” you promise her. 

“There will be a test.”

“Well the only straight thing about me is my As.”

“You are starting to sound like me,” Ellie points out mischievously. “But I just pulled onto my street, so I’ll say goodbye now, and text you later?”

“Sounds like a plan.”

“Talk to you later, babe.”

“Bye, babe!”

When you park your car the next morning you have a text from Ellie. “Don’t go into homeroom right away.”

Your locker isn’t far from the room so you wait there, you know she knows where it is. The locker door is left ajar, to make it seem like there’s a purpose for standing there. No sign of her anywhere. The bell rings and you hope she’s close by, you don’t want to be too late. 

The last of the students that had been milling around start going to their respective home rooms. Then you spot her.

Auburn hair, half up half down. Beat up converse. Ripped jeans. A black t-shirt under a black and gray flannel. Ellie is waiting down the hall from you, looking smug. She waves at you and you are surprised, you aren’t totally alone, but wave right back. Ellie doesn’t move towards you though. She just watches, like she’s expecting you to leave right away. 

But you know what? Fuck it.

You shut your locker and strut towards her. Shoulders back, chin in the air. There’s only two other people in the hallway at this point. As you approach her, she looks very surprised, but just as happy. When you are right in front of her you look and see the two other student’s backs are to you. You give her a kiss, turn around, and go to your homeroom. 

Tags: @bready101, @st4r-b3rries, @tlou-bombshell, @stvrs13, @dinanellie, @everegretseverything, @mikellie, @lamolaine, @0pheli4, @soupycloud, @radioheadfan699, @callmelola111, @hysteriawillnotsuccumb, @normalthing111, @3isosoup, @lmaoo-spiderman, @cqliflower, @ellstronaut

(I most of these aren't even tagging, if you are tagged and it's not working lmk, I can try and fix it!!! I also think some people have changed usernames so if you have, I can replace it!!

[prettyboypistol]

hi there!! I'm new here, and I really like your writing lol. There's not a whole male reader stuff in the tf2 fandom from what I've seen, like, at all, and you're writing is just- skandnsns *so* good-

Anyways, uh, I'm sorry if you're not taking requests right now, I only just found your blog about a month ago, but I wanted to send in smt if that's okay??

Anyways, I was wonderin' if you could write something with the mercs, with a reader who has a panic attack the first time they respawn?

Like, maybe their a recent recruit, and they somehow haven't died on the battlefield yet?? The feeling of dying is probably horrible, that moment of not being able to breath, before nothing, even after respawning, so maybe after the match they skink off by themselves, not even noticing how off their acting as they leave. Platonic or romantic is fine lol. Sorry if I worded this weird, or it's too long, I've never really requested smt before

Anyways, love your writing dude!!

First Respawn || TF2 Mercs x M!Reader

can be read as platonic or romantic

Context: You and another merc were actually doing pretty well together- since you were assigned to shadow the more experienced people to really figure out how to fight and travel efficiently. Both of you were caught off guard by an enemy Heavy, who killed you both.

Scout

Jeremy respawned with a fit of curses and a stretching routine, yammering on about how Heavys shouldn't be allowed to sneak around. Then, he looked over to you. You were frantically touching over your chest and legs, desperately searching for the wounds you just felt agonizingly rip you from life. Jeremy bit the inside of his cheek before he crouched down to where you were.

"Hey man, 's'all good. That's respawn for you! You can never die here!" Scout explained lightheartedly.

"I- I felt-" A wrapped finger pressed against your lips, followed by a look of understanding and underlying discomfort.

"Shh, I know. I can't stand it either, but you don't really have a choice. You either just don't die or you bite your tongue and power through, kay? If the bosslady sees us chit-chattin', we'll both be in trouble!" Jeremy pulled you to stand up and shoved your weapon into your arms. "We can talk about it later, I'm really sorry pal."

Soldier

You and Jane were quickly executed and brought back to spawn. For Soldier, it was just another death. It's not like it meant anything! He quickly gathered his weapon and charged out, only to return a few seconds later.

"ON YOUR FEET, PRIVATE! UNLESS THOSE LEGS ARE BROKEN, OUR COUNTRY EXPECTS US TO FIGHT!" He tried to encourage you.

"I just died!" You wheeze out, more shocked than anything. "I'm dead! I got killed! I-"

Soldier yanked you to your feet and dragged you out to the battle field again, much to your scrambled protests.

"TEUFORT IS ALL ABOUT DYING AND COMING BACK! WE CAN LIVE FOREVER HERE!"

From somewhere you can't quite make out, you hear your Medic start to shout: "We are not living forever! Just unkillable!"

Pyro

Pyro had never seen a reaction like that before for respawn. They had seen anger, frustration- well, mostly anger. They watched carefully as tears streamed down your eyes as you sunk to the ground. You seemed... shell shocked? It was hard to really see through the pink clouds and mishearing your sobs as baby's laughter, but Pyro could definitely tell that something was up.

They placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, then pat your head softly with a humming of an upbeat tune. You didn't know the Pyro well, but from what you had heard from Engie and Medic, this was a definite attempt to comfort you. With one last sniffle, Pyro pointed to the doors with an excited cheer. You knew you had a job to do and not enough time in the day to do it in.

Pyro kept you close and looked around a lot more once out on the field as they hid you from most people's sight.

Demoman

As much as you and Tavish were friends off the clock, he really could be too daft. You gasped as you respawned, coughing violently. Tavish turned to you with a confused expression, but realized immediately that- oh shit, that was your first respawn. Demoman pulled you close and cradled you tight with a murmuring for you to follow his deep breaths.

"Right-o, breeeeathe. In... Out... Good job, just deep breaths." Tavish sighed quietly as he led you out of the spawn room and to a more private location. "That's respawn. You can't die here- but it's a hell of a thing to get used to it is. Sit back and hide while you calm down. If anyone notices a dip in my killstreak, I'd get a paycut."

As asshole-ish as it was for him to leave you, you really understood. He had a mother to take care of, after all. At least he talked to you after in detail about the functions along with Engineer and Medic.

Heavy

Heavy immediately noticed the nervous shakes that wracked through your body as life seemed to be thrust back into your arms just as quickly as it was torn away. Mikhail sighed and patted your back- a little too roughly for your liking, but the height and power difference was most likely to blame for that.

"It is... not easy to start- jarring? Yes, jarring at start." Mikhail sympathizes. "Deep breathing, we won't let it happen again." He promised as he nudged Sasha towards you. All you could offer was a weak smile as tears forced themselves down your cheeks.

Heavy felt a pang of guilt for needing to go right back to work, especially when his charge was so broken up about literally dying (it was reasonable, after all.), but orders were orders and the mouths of his family couldn't be fed by wasting time. He kept you close as he refused to keep you out of his sight at all- protecting you from any further harm.

Engineer

"Dag-nabbit! Those big guys should- oh." Dell watched as you started to hyperventilate and quickly rushed you to the intel room for a bit more privacy.

"Here, we can set up a few sentries here. Hide under the desk while I'm gone, okay? I'll be right back son." Was all you really could hear as you scrambled over to the desk with shakes and sobs deafening you to the outside world. It felt like hours, but finally a warm presence enveloped you. Dell stroked your hair and shushed you softly as you worked through the thrill of revival.

"I bet that was a scare, huh? Don't you worry. Me and Medic worked extra hard on these machines. You're gonna be safe in my hands, son. Don't you worry one lil' bit."

Spy

He rolled his eyes as you tried to feel for the now-healed bullet wounds, but deep down, he knew that he did the exact same thing on his first respawn. Half heartedly, he offered you a cigarette.

"It takes your mind off it- are you allergic to cannabis?"

How the hell did he manage to smuggle marijuana into a military establishment?! Wasn't this one of the most secure bases of Mann. Co?! Nevertheless, in moreso an act of desperation rather than actual desire to smoke, you deeply inhaled the smoke... Only to cough so loud and violently that you accidentally made yourself throw up.

Your superior was not impressed at the sight.

"I'm never letting you smoke my cigarettes again."

Medic

Ludwig was just how you expected him to be as you crumpled to your knees. He bragged about his amazing invention in an attempt to comfort you. A gloved hand brushed over your chest at where the bullets were with a manic smile.

"See! No holes! Quite the genius invention, yes?" He hummed happily. "Now, I know the adrenaline is still in your veins from well- dying- but that is more of a boost for when you get back out on the field!"

"Boost?! Back Out?! Hell no!" You protested as you scrambled away from Ludwig. "I fucking died!"

He clicked his tongue with an unamused expression. "Only temporarily- I'd argue not at all! Your heart barely stopped!"

You decided to keep your emotions and arguments to yourself.

Sniper

"How the hell did the big guy even get into my nest? Probably broke the ladder climbin'- you alright?"

You clearly weren't.

"Awe shit, yeah. Probably your first time kickin' the bucket." He muttered, mostly to himself as he crouched down to speak to you at eye level.

"Don't be too frazzled, chickadee. It's not the Heavy's you'll be worrying about mostly when you stick with me. At least the other Spy is efficient about the backstabs. I barely even feel 'em half the time."

You knew he was trying to be comforting, but it really just... didn't work too well.

[kiefbowl]

this is a random thought I had in the shower actually well over a month ago, but I've been gnawing at it in my brain...and perhaps this is going to sound pathetic and a bit esoteric.

So, it suddenly dawned on me very randomly while I was showering that I have been paying for netflix for my own account since I was a freshman in college. Back in the dvd days, I remember having Firefly sent to me disk by disk my fall semester. This is 2009. It was an important part of college because I let my friends use it on their console and we'd all go to their dorm and watch streaming, and I passed out my log in to a ton of friends. I basically provided free Netflix to more or less 10 or so people over the course of four years for not even $7 a month I think.

What hit me though was that means, this year - that will be 15 years. That's what stopped me in my shower to stare off in the abyss for like 10 minutes and what's been on my mind for the past several weeks. I've been paying netflix for 15 years, which is the longest I've ever done anything. There is no other company I've so consistently paid for like this either, not for that many of years not even close. Quite possibly my longest relationship outside of my family and 2-3 other people. Netflix, the ever constant, of all forsaken things.

And what really bothers me about it is that, uhm, not to be an American consumer but like...I don't feel appreciated by netflix. For the past few years, I've barely used it, except for a few titles I've wanted to watch. I haven't passed out my log in since I changed it not long after college to keep an ex using it for free. I've remained loyal, despite the fact that I don't feel like some sort of loyal consumerist. I don't give a fuck about brands, I try to shop as little as possible, thrift what I can. And yet, what can I say? I actually am a loyal consumerist, to netflix that is.

What a shock to realize this, and what a shock to realize netflix does not acknowledge this, no email saying thanks, no surveys, no swag, no pizza party, no invite no perk no discount no nothing. Instead they raise prices, cut services, lose licenses, and cancel barely finished products. I'm 15 years loyal to this company for this?

And I think about the days of yore, but really not long ago. The preferred shopper's catalogues of department stores, the longtime shopper promotions of industry giants, the award systems for the loyal consumerists of chains and malls. The specialty Christmas items that are today vintage and worth money for their rarity. The thank yous, the special events. The mailers that say "Come to our store loyal customer and receive a free $20 coupon for that day!" And I'm not saying this is good, and of course it's all just marketing and advertisement, and I'm not saying this is the life I want to live...

But I am saying this would be easy for netflix to do, for someone like me. Someone who went from $7 to stream and receive DVDs, who got customers onboard when the model was new and the company was pioneering, to $20 to sit unused but for a month or two out of the year. It would be easy to pull the data. It would be easy to say which accounts have been opened the longest, to actually verify who has given 180 months worth of payments to them. It would be easy to give me a year's discount to say thank you. It would be easy for them to send an email to verify my address to send me merch. Do I want the merch? No, not really. But have they tried?

Have they even sent me an email saying "We appreciate your 15 years of support! We value you!" with little confetti animation? They didn't do it at 10 years. They didn't do it at 5 years. I don't recall ever receiving emails from netflix besides "Unfortunately, our payment model is changing."

As of today, I haven't pulled my account yet. I want to finish Bridgerton, even if this season is a snoozefest. But I think I will. I feel had and used, as pathetic as that sounds. Has Hulu done anything different? I can't remember when I signed up for them but it's been many years. No, but I frankly use it more, so I'm less angry. And with netflix...it's been fifteen years. They have really banked on us being passive in our payments, and accustomed to the freedom of endless choice, and it just feels gleeful that they never even once acknowledged I've been here this whole time. Actually, act like Sears and Bloomingdales 60 years ago, or we quit I think we should say. Ask me my address to send me a glass netflix mug or I'll fuck off, because who do you think you are to think so little of me, the only reason you exist for?

[arc852]

13. Betwixt

Definition: between

Summary: During one of their weekly movie nights, Joel finds a movie about borrowers called The Secret World of Arrietty. They decide to watch it.

G/t: Grian and Joel are normal-sized, Jimmy is a borrower

Word Count: 3169

AO3 Link

I'm gonna be honest about this one guys, I didn't exactly follow the prompt. It kind of got away from me. It's still a good one though! Another installment in the BBBCAU!

Also, I'm sorry if you haven't seen The Secret World of Arrietty. I highly recommend it if you haven't but hopefully this isn't too confusing without having seen the movie.

And fun fact, I actually rewatched the movie while I was writing this to be more accurate with what they were reacting to. Because I did this, this prompt probably took me the longest to write out of all of them. I did have a lot of fun writing it though!

I hope you enjoy!

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 “Alright! It’s time for a movie night!” Joel exclaimed, grabbing his laptop off his desk and opening it up to set up their movie. The three of them had just finished having dinner and, since it was a friday night and neither human had any classes for the next two days, it was time for their weekly movie night.

 Jimmy loved it. Not only did he enjoy spending time with Grian and Joel but he also looked forward to watching the actual movies themselves. Living in the walls of the dorms, he had only ever managed to get glances at some of the movies the humans would watch. And with no sound, since most humans would watch them with headphones on. But now, he could watch all the movies and Grian and Joel were more than willing to show him the classics.

 Grian stood up from his chair and started on the popcorn and Jimmy waited patiently on the table for somebody to grab him and bring him over to where they would be watching. Usually it would be Joel, who didn’t take long to set the movie up but it seemed he was taking a bit longer this time. So by the time the popcorn was done and dumped in a bowl, Jimmy was still waiting on the table.

 Grian gave him a confused look and then looked over at Joel. “Have you not picked the movie yet?” He asked as he held the popcorn in one hand and used the other to scoop Jimmy up.

 Joel looked up from his laptop briefly to look at the two. “I have, I’m just trying to find it. Bloomin’ streaming services…” He mumbled the last bit under his breath, still clicking and searching through the movies.

 Grian sat down on his bed and let Jimmy off onto the plush surface. Jimmy gained his balance easily enough and now all they were waiting on was Joel. “What movie is it?” Jimmy asked Joel, looking over to Grian briefly to see if he knew, but the other human just shrugged.

 Joel was quiet for another moment before he suddenly exclaimed, “Ah ha! Found it!” Joel finally looked away from his laptop and addressed Jimmy’s question. “Okay, so the other day I was looking to see what movie we could watch and I came across, well, this.” Joel flipped his laptop around in order to show the screen to Grian and Jimmy. On it was the poster for the movie in question.

 “The Secret World of Arrietty?” Grian read off but as he did so, Jimmy’s breath hitched at what he saw. A girl, only a few inches tall, behind a jar with a human looking down at her.

 “Yep. It’s about, get this…borrowers.” Joel revealed and both Grian and Jimmy’s eyes went wide. Jimmy’s with a bit more panic.

 “What?! B-But how is that possible? Do they know? How are we just hearing about this?” Jimmy asked, panicking at the thought of his people being found out. 

 “Whoa, whoa! Jim, calm down.” Joel tried, setting his laptop down and going to sit on the edge of the bed. “I was worried when I first saw it too, so I did some research. Apparently, this movie is based on a book from the 50s. And it’s regarded as completely fictional.”

 “A book…Oh! I knew the term borrowers felt familiar!” Grian exclaimed, referencing something from back when they first met Jimmy. 

 “So…everyone who knows about these movies and books thinks borrowers are fake?” Jimmy asked, calming down a bit.

 Joel nodded. “Yeah. I mean, I can’t speak for the original author. Knowing what we know now, I wouldn’t be surprised if her book was actually based on a true story. But all the material that came after that and all the people who have read her books think it’s nothing more than fiction. So I think you guys are safe.”

 With that, Jimmy let out a breath and relaxed from his tensed up position. “Oh, okay, that’s good.”

 Grian nodded along. “That makes sense. Besides, if borrowers really were found out, I think we would be seeing it all over the news instead of in the form of a movie from…” He checked the date on the screen. “2010.”

 “Right, right, sorry.” Jimmy said, feeling sheepish at his reaction. He looked down, rubbing the back of his head. “I just, ya know, heard the word borrower coming from a human made thing and panicked.”

 “Which is completely understandable.” Joel said. “I felt much the same when I first saw it. I probably should have announced it in a better way though. That one might be on me.” Joel admitted and Grian snorted.

 “Yeah, you definitely could have done that a lot better.” Grian teased and Jimmy couldn’t help but chuckle a bit. Despite the fact he was still trying to calm down from his initial panic. 

 “Yeah, yeah, it’s my fault.” Joel said with a roll of his eyes, though there was a sense of sincerity in his tone. He really did blame himself for making Jimmy panic like that. “Did you guys still want to watch it? I understand if it might be too much for you, Jim.”

 Jimmy thought about it for a moment. On one hand, watching something about his kind made by humans made him nervous. On the other hand, he was curious to see what kind of stuff they got right and wrong and in how much detail they went into about a borrower’s life. So, despite himself, he nodded. “Yeah, I want to see what these humans came up with.”

 “Got to say, I’m a bit curious too.” Grian admitted and Joel nodded and set up the laptop properly at the edge of the bed. 

 Once that was done, Joel turned off the lights and went around the opposite side of the bed to Grian. He picked Jimmy up so as to not worry about where he was when he settled down, and layed down on the bed. Grian did the same next to him so that both humans were on their stomachs facing the laptop.

 Once they were situated, Joel let Jimmy back onto the bed, the borrower now between the two humans with the best spot to see the screen.

 Jimmy would never admit out loud that this was his favorite spot for other reasons as well. He’d get teased into next week if he revealed he liked being this close to the two of them. It just gave him a sense of safety, being between his two friends, a barrier on either side protecting him from anything that might be dangerous to someone like him.

 It was so cheesy and cringy just in Jimmy’s own head, he could never imagine saying it out loud.

 While Grian and Joel were laying down, Jimmy decided to sit criss-cross instead. The popcorn bowl was placed a little bit behind him, so it wasn’t in his way, and then he was handed a piece of popcorn by Grian as Joel pressed play on the movie.

 Jimmy took a small bite of the food, still nervous for what the movie had in store for him.

 It started out simple enough. The animation was beautiful and Jimmy couldn’t help but be a bit jealous of Arriety’s home. His little nook within the walls of the college dorms were nothing in comparison to the grand home Arriety’s family had made for themselves. Maybe he could have had that too if he hadn’t decided to live in a place like this. But it had been the best option for him by far. 

 The term ‘beans’ got brought up, which, of course, Grian and Joel couldn’t just ignore. “Beans?” Joel asked with a raised brow, looking down at Jimmy.

 Jimmy felt his cheeks heat up. “It’s-I mean, it was an old term used by borrowers to refer to humans.” Jimmy crossed his arms and very pointedly did not look at either human. “I haven’t heard it in ages though and I never used it myself.” He added on, trying to make himself look better.

 “Yeah, but how did you even come up with beans anyway?” Joel asked, still trying to figure it out.

 Jimmy bit his lip. “Well…” He was cut off.

 “Wait. Human beings. Human be-ings. Human…beans.” Grian slowly figured out and then grinned. “Oh my gosh.”

 “Aww, that’s actually kind of adorable.” Joel teased, grinning as well.

 Jimmy felt his face heat up even more and he covered his hands with his face. “Can we please just get back to the movie?”

 The two laughed but they did turn back towards the screen.

 There was some mention about children shortly after. About how dangerous they were, even more so than the adults. Jimmy himself shivered and found himself nodding in agreement despite himself. Grian and Joel noticed but didn’t say anything. 

 A few seconds later, something else was revealed. 

 “I’m sorry, did they say 14?” Joel asked incredulously.

 Jimmy nodded. “Yeah, that’s usually around the time borrowers start to fend for themselves. Although I think it’s gotten earlier and earlier.” Jimmy thought back. “I went off on my own at 12, but that was mostly…because…” Jimmy trailed off as he caught Grian and Joel’s eyes. There was that indescribable emotion again. Jimmy didn’t know what it was, but he didn’t like it. “Nevermind.”

 “Jim-” Joel started but stopped when he saw Grian subtly shake his head. He mouthed ‘not now’ and Joel huffed but didn’t say anything more.

 Back to the movie, Jimmy was suddenly and inexplicably hit with an existential crisis. He tried not to think about other borrowers. But it had been a long time since he had seen any himself. Sometimes, he also wondered how many of his kind were even still out there.

 Grian and Joel pointedly did not say anything.

 The borrowing scene played out, which Jimmy supposed was fairly accurate. Although he couldn’t help but wonder why they would be borrowing when there were still human’s awake in the house. One of the humans could have suddenly opened the drawer they were in. Or walked into the kitchen. It didn’t make sense.

 Meanwhile, Grian and Joel were in a bit of awe. The movie did a great job giving a borrower’s perspective on things. And a little too well. Joel felt a bit dizzy at the height and he didn’t even mind them usually. It was also just incredible, to see how intuitive borrowers could be. Grian made a mental note to ask Jimmy how accurate it really was later on.

 They got to the dollhouse and Jimmy couldn’t help but feel a bit uneasy. Especially when Arrietty’s dad pointed out how they weren’t toys. He couldn’t help but feel, just a little, that the dollhouse had been some sort of…trap or something, for the borrowers.

 He shook his head and continued watching. Arrietty and her dad had left the dollhouse and were now grabbing the tissue paper they needed. And then-

 The human saw them.

 Jimmy couldn’t help but jump and gasp, almost the same as Arrietty did. He couldn’t help it. Those eyes felt like they were pointed right at him. 

 He briefly heard Joel mutter an “oh no” before turning his attention back to see what would happen.

 The boy spoke, and Jimmy couldn’t help but compare his words to when he first met Grian and Joel. It was similar, at least in the beginning. Don’t be scared. We’re not going to hurt you.

 He wasn’t sure how to feel about it.

 When Arrietty left, he let out a sigh of relief. “He didn’t grab her.” Jimmy said to himself, both as a fact and in wonder. Any other human, knowing a borrower was there, would have at least attempted to catch them. At least, that’s what Jimmy believed anyway.

Unbeknownst to him though, Grian and Joel had heard his remark. They sent each other a look, also reminded of their first meeting with Jimmy. Joel was starting to regret putting this movie on.

 “That’s weird.” Jimmy said a few moments later, this time loud enough he was sure Grian and Joel could hear. One of them hummed in response, he couldn’t tell which one. “It’s weird the dad would just brush off what just happened. They should be packing up their things and moving after being seen like that.”

 You didn’t. Grian almost said the words out loud but he stopped himself. He didn’t want to bring it up now. “Oh.” He said instead, a simple response to let Jimmy know he had heard him.

 The movie went on and eventually got to the scene at the window. Jimmy was tense the entire time, a fall from that height would be fatal or a smack from the bird could have done a lot of damage as well. And then, Arrietty was grabbed and everything in the movie slowed down and became quiet.

 Well, grabbed was putting it too strongly. The human more had her cupped in his hand, not restricting her at all really. Which came into play a moment later, when Arrietty was simply able to get away.

 Again, Jimmy thought it was weird. It felt like the movie was downplaying the fear borrowers had towards humans.

 Joel flexed his hand subconsciously, looking down at it and then over at Jimmy. He was always aware of how small Jimmy was in his grasp. But seeing it in a movie…it felt weird.

 “There it is.” Jimmy said as Pod finally revealed they needed to leave. “Took them long enough.”

 They got to the other dollhouse scene, where the humans were discussing it. So not…really a trap then. The humans had good intentions it seemed like. And honestly, the house looked really nice, especially with all the working appliances in it. But it still felt wrong.

 A bit later into the movie, Jimmy felt horrified when the human tried to help by ripping out their old kitchen for the new one. Again, the human had good intentions but…

 Grian and Joel seemed to think the same. 

 “That’s bloomin’ terrifying.” Joel said, and when Jimmy looked over he could tell Joel’s shoulders were tense.

 “How did he think that would be a good idea? Honestly?” Grian said, exasperated and honestly annoyed at the character.

 Jimmy couldn’t help but chuckle a little. It was kind of funny having two humans reacting like that.

 They continued watching and got to the part where Shawn saw Arrietty for the first time. The mood was down and Joel decided to try and lift it. “I can tell you right now Jim, neither of us thought you were beautiful when we first saw you.”

 The sudden quip made Jimmy laugh out loud and Joel smiled in victory. “Hey! I take offense to that, you know. I’m very beautiful.”

 Grian snickered, glad for the short break. “Sure, you keep telling yourself that.” Grian said and then reached over and ruffled Jimmy’s hair.

 “Hey! Stop that!” Jimmy said, but was laughing at the same time, trying to push Grian’s finger away. 

 The scene changed in the movie, bringing their attention back to the screen as Hara discovered the borrower’s home. The mood dampened again. The look on Hara’s face when she saw Homily. It sent more than a shiver down Jimmy’s spine.

 “Okay…I take back what I said before. That is terrifying.” Joel said, wondering if that’s anyway how him and Grian looked…before. He looked over at Grian, who’s eyes remained on the screen, his brow pinched.

 Jimmy could only nod at Joel’s statement.

 Homily was grabbed and Grian’s hand clenched in turn. Jimmy, thankfully, didn’t notice. Too caught up by what was happening on screen.

 The look of fear on the borrower’s face made Grian feel…guilty. Was that how Jimmy felt, way back then? Did he still feel that way? Grian and Joel had made it a habit to just…pick Jimmy up whenever they pleased. Jimmy never said anything about it before. But…was he just too scared to?

 Grian rubbed his head, closing his eyes for a moment. He silently cursed Joel for finding this movie in the first place. It was making him question too many things.

 When Homily was put in a jar, Jimmy could only be thankful that that had never happened to him.

 When Arrietty went to Shawn for help, Joel couldn’t keep in his questions any longer. “What’s it like being held?”

 Jimmy, startled by the question, looked up at Joel with wide eyes. “To be…held?”

 “You know…” Joel suddenly felt a bit self-conscious for asking and was blatantly ignoring Grian’s look. “In a hand. In one of…our…hands.”

 “Oh.” Jimmy couldn’t help but look down at Joel’s hands at the question causing Joel to self-consciously tuck his hands closer to himself. The movie must be getting to them more than Jimmy originally thought.

 He couldn’t really blame them though. It was getting to him too, just a little bit.

 He thought about it for a moment, trying his best to come up with the right thing to say. How to explain it…?

 “You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.” Grian chimed in, glaring at Joel from above Jimmy. “You can just ignore--”

 “It feels safe.”

 Grian shut up.

 Jimmy continued, looking down at his own hands. “I guess it didn’t always feel like that. It was constricting before, overwhelming, I felt…well, I felt helpless. I can feel the strength in your hands, I know how much damage they can do.”

 “Jimmy…” Joel started but Jimmy didn’t stop.

 “It’s still overwhelming, not gonna lie. I don’t think that will ever go away. But it’s different now. The…I guess, the uncertainty is gone. I know you two mean well, I know you two would never hurt me. And I feel…protected. So…yeah. It feels safe. I-I guess.” Jimmy added on the last bit, suddenly feeling flustered by what he had just said. 

 Jimmy braced himself for the teasing but was surprised when it didn’t come.

 “O-Oh.” Joel said, his voice a bit watery. “That’s uh…I-I’m glad.”

 Grian didn’t say anything but he was happy to know his earlier thoughts held no substance. Jimmy was fine being picked up and wasn’t afraid of them and Grian blames this movie entirely for making him second guess that.

 Actually, scratch that, he blames Joel.

 They watched the rest of the movie play out. Arrietty and Shawn saved her mom, Hara was seen to look like a crazy person, and Arrietty said one last goodbye to Shawn before leaving.

 The three friends were silent as the credits rolled.

 “Well that was…a lot.” Jimmy broke the silence.

 “You can say that again.” Joel said, letting out a little sigh.

 It was silent for another moment.

 “All in favor of banning Joel from picking any more movies?” Grian asked, raising his hand.

 “Me.” Jimmy said, also raising his hand.

 “Wha-? Hey!”

[britt-kageryuu]

The stream is viewing a blue starry void, with Leo sitting against something, kinda in a lounging position.

His model is dressed in dark blue space themed leggings, a plain oversized blue hoodie, black socks, and his mask with star patterns on the tails. He's playing through the early parts of Dreamlight Valley.

"So, I have to complete like a million odd quests to unlock every character, but I still have to wait multiple days for certain ones to actually be unlockable." Leo says as he has his character run around doing random tasks to collect enough 'glimmer' to unlock the next area. "This is a cozy game, but you have to go through so much story before you can really relax. Then you move onto the DLC!" Leo jokes as he goes back to Scrooge to complete a quest. He turns his head upwards as if trying to look at someone behind him who just asked a question.

"Huh? Oh, 'Is there any character I want to unlock most?' Yeah, the little Blue Alien Stitch! Though I looked up how to unlock him, and it can take Ten real life days to unlock him, and I need to finish unlocking Donald first." He says while running off to cook some food to keep his energy bar yellow. "This is part of why it's hard to think of Dreamlight as a cozy game. And yeah, some other cozy games can be more hectic, but needing to wait multiple real world days for progress to continue can be hard. On my patience at least, the wait is driving me nuts."

Leo stretches out a bit before snuggling back into what he's sitting on. Then lets out a slight off, and looks down at his stomach area with a smile. Light churrs can be heard over the mic, along with a laugh that was definitely not Leo, or recognizable as any of the Turtles. Leading to a slight frenzy in the chat.

Though the moment is interrupted by an alarm noice. Leo leans over to grab what is apparently his phone. "Oh, nice, I can now safely take some more medicine." He moves forward a bit, "Hey can you grab my stuff from the over there?" He askes someone who is in the room with him. He's watching the person, "The one with the blue grumpy face... hmm? Sure. Use the one called 'Calm the Dragon', yeah it's a newer blend we made. I have to keep April and Cass from stealing my stash." Leo lets out a laugh while still watching the person, listening to whatever is being said.

The person came back and handed Leo his medicine, and a mug of tea. Leo toses the medicine in his mouth and drank from a different container than the mug in his hand.

"Can you move that small table over here, gotta let the tea sit, and I don't want to be holding it the entire time." Leo asks, then placed the mug down, and got back into the position he was in before. "I swear if it weren't for a few personal reasons, I'd get rid of this curse."

"A Curse? Is that what you call it?" The person asked. The audience is confused on why the person could be heard then, but not before.

Leo turns around, "Well I can't think of something creative right now. Now just let me get through this. I need to mess around with some stuff to get this quest to complete."

After a few minutes of collecting random items, and moving furniture around for the quest, Leo pauses to grab his tea, and takes a long sip then lets out a sigh.

"We haven't finished the package design for this just yet, but it definitely will be available to buy soon you guys." Leo once again snuggles back, and just enjoys his tea while the 'stream friendly' music from the game plays. He almost forgets to continue playing because he wants to just bask in the moment and relax.

After about an hour more Leo puts the stream into BRB to freshen up, and grab a quick meal, with Usagi who was hanging out with him all stream. Acting as a very comfy living hot water bottle.

----------------

Masterpost

I had only a very small part of this actually thought out, then just winged it.

[nofacednerd]

just some more episode 6 thoughts

Obviously the Hughie thing is pretty prominent in my mind because uh. comfort character got SA'd but I'm seeing a lot of people here and on twitter think the writers were treating it as a joke? Idk if I agree with that. I think they were trying to make the scenes with it extremely uncomfortable to watch intentionally. The end of the episode at least makes it VERY clear that it (at least in the aftermath) isn't a joke. He's clearly extremely upset about what happened? idk maybe I'm not seeing something other people are seeing.

That being said, it's so gross that people on twitter/instagram ARE treating it as a joke. I think, yeah, it was kind of extreme (a lot more extreme than the other times it's happened in the show, which usually is a cut away and then talking about it afterwards) and the cake thing was just weird, uncomfortable, and unnecessary but idk I really don't think it was meant to be played for laughs for the most part

Unrelated to the above, I fucking loved Neuman this episode. Tbh I've liked Neuman a lot since season 3, she's a fun villain-ish? I'm gonna be honest, maybe I'm missing something somewhere or forgetting something, but isn't her end goal to literally just give supes opportunities to live outside of the entertainment industry? Like yeah she killed a ton of people but I feel like Neuman and The Boys have the exact same goals (killing Homelander/keeping the general public safe from superheroes) and she keeps trying to make an alliance with them??? Hughie she was your bestie for like a year and a half I know you feel betrayed by her but genuinely I don't think she's your biggest problem

Anyway Neuman especially shined this episode. The head exploding thing. Me too girl. Also her and lobotomy!Sage interacting was so funny I wish we could get more of that

Also loved that at the beginning of the episode, literally all of The Boys were there. That's his family and they're there to support him!!!!

ALSO I really like that they separated Frenchie and Kimiko this season a little bit, it's nice to actually see that Kimiko is friends with the others beyond him. Her and Annie both immediately agreeing to go rescue their boy in the mansion...... Hughie Kimiko besties are real and not just in my head for once

Tbh this whole episode showed really good team solidarity between at least Hughie, Kimiko, MM, and Annie. They all showed up to support Hughie while spreading his dad's ashes, Hughie off screen seems to have talked to Kimiko enough to know why she's upset, Hughie IMMEDIATELY coming in with the purell for MM, all 3 of them realizing how much danger Hughie was in and all going in with halothane to go rescue him, Kimiko going off to find A-Train and convincing him to take MM to the hospital, Kimiko, Annie, and Hughie all torturing Tek Knight for information and stealing all of his money and donating it to charity..... like this group was all so in sync with each other this episode it was great

Main negative thought is that honestly I'm confused on where the last 2 episodes are going to go? So far this whole season has just been disconnected B-plots. No major changes or revelations have happened yet (and based on this episode, I'm getting the feeling that Hughie might be tapping out for a bit from the team stuff). The main plotline is mostly about the supe virus and Sage, but that's all been very background stuff and it feels like there isn't going to be a lot of time to unpack everything going on? Especially since there's so many plotlines that haven't been completed yet. I know the thing this season is that the team isn't doing great, hence why they're all wrapped up in separate, personal dramas, but the last episode barely accomplished anything, on both sides.

I'm not complaining per se, I think this is the biggest issue with streaming service shows tbh. It's very obvious that the show wants to complete a bunch of emotional character arcs going into the final season (Hughie confronting his grief/inability to let go, Kimiko and Frenchie confronting their pasts and the guilt that comes with it, Annie struggling to figure out who she is as a person and as a symbol, MM struggling with his mental health and being a good dad, Butcher struggling to not kill literally everyone, ect ect) but there just isn't a whole lot of time to do both character studies, exploring different group dynamics, fulfilling show-long arcs, and keep up with a main plotline when you only have about 8 hours to do all of that and about 15 characters to do all of that with. If the seasons got more episodes, we could deal with a few filler episodes here and there to focus more solely on the characters vs the plot.

Tldr ^^ this season is more character-driven than plot driven, which makes it all kind of feel like filler and idk how the last 2 episodes are going to go

[rainbowsky]

Hi, how do you know Jackie Chan is a part of LOCH? I’ve been trying to find as much info on this film as possible and I never came across anything mentioning Jackie Chan. Also this film is already a big budget film, which is also the reason why I feel Tsui Hark chose Xiao Zhan specifically because he’s number one in popularity and with immense popularity he comes with good acting so it was a win-win but although I want this film to be released internationally really badly especially my country, I still fear being disappointed. Would they really invest in an international release? and is there a way if fans could get their messages across to them asking for an international release? because i will honestly cry if xiao zhan’s first movie (during my time as his fan) is released and i as a die hard fan can’t even watch it on big screen!! 

This is in reference to a previous post.

The full cast has not been officially announced yet, but it was all over the media at the time of GG was announced as Guo Jing. You can find articles mentioning it just by Googling. There were several big name actors mentioned in smaller supporting roles, and it actually caused a bit of controversy at the time among netizens (who, of course, always stress out over who can do justice to their favorite literary heroes).

Feng Shaofeng - Genghis Khan

Hui Yinghong - Li Ping

Jackie Chan - Hong Qigong

Official accounts haven't confirmed (or denied) these widespread rumors, but we will likely know a lot more soon. The film is slated to be released for Spring Festival, which is the second weekend in February. No doubt there will be some promotional materials, etc. coming out in the next couple of months.

As for whether it will be released abroad - I honestly don't get why fans are always hand-wringing over whether their films will be released internationally. I find that confusing as heck.

It is safe to assume that pretty much all of their movies will be released to international audiences. It would be odd for them not to appear outside China.

Keep in mind that - alongside non-Chinese speaking international audiences who take an interest in international films - there is a huge population of Chinese people living all over the world. In my region, for example, 20% of the population are Chinese Canadians. There is a demand outside of China, for Chinese films.

Legend of the Condor Heroes is one of the most popular novels in China, and is appreciated all over the world. It's an outstanding book. I urge everyone to read it (or enjoy the audiobook). I can't overstate how good it is.

GG is also very popular, and his international fame is growing. Films stand to make more money the more screens they're seen on. It's simple math.

This film WILL be seen outside of China. Any agonizing over whether it will is a waste of one's mental health. It's going to be a big release. It will be seen far and wide. It's will probably make a lot of money. It's got a good formula, a good director, etc.

And even if it doesn't come to some countries - as with all of their projects - it will eventually end up on streaming services. You will get a chance to see it.

Edit: as I said in the comments of this post, there will always be some countries where there really won't be legal options for viewing. That's just the unfortunate reality of the situation. In those cases, there is no shame in watching a pirated version. I feel that it is better to watch their projects, thereby being able to write a review and promote the project to other people, etc. than to not watch them at all.

As long as we are supporting the film financially if there is any option to do so at all. There have been people who have bought tickets for their films in regions that they are unable to travel to, just to support the film. People can also buy tickets for other fans who cannot otherwise afford to go.

There are also often official merchandise and things like that which can be purchased from anywhere in the world.

You can also contact your favorite local streaming services and request for those projects to be made available to you. The more fans who express an interest in their films, the more likelihood a streaming service will make an effort to obtain rights.

There is no guarantee, of course, but it's worth a try. I also encourage people to be patient, because it can take a while for a movie to make it onto streaming platforms. Just because it is available in some regions and not others doesn't mean it won't eventually make it on to yours.

As long as we are supporting to the best of our ability, that's all that anyone can do.

[thechaoticplayer]

can we get some psyborg smut? Please? -Starved Stargazer&Comfydant

PSYBORG OMG I WAS LITERALLY WATCHING THEM BEING CUTE A COUPLE DAYS AGO I GOT U MY FELLOW STARGAZER AND COMFYDANT

and looking at ship art on pinterest along with some sonnyban ❤❤

PSYBORG BULLSHIT GO-

PSYBORG SMUT FIC (CLEARLY SCUFFED AND UNPROOFREAD) Summary: Uki's a bit drunk and Fulgar tries to get his ass to bed. Ends up being more than just that... after a night of sleep of course because Fulgar as you see in Ukimama's (drunk) streams always takes care of him. Author's note: I had to do a lot of research because I haven't done a mlm smut fic in so long 😭😭 cute fluff sprinkled in bc yeah ty for requesting my first ever request wahhhh WARNING: WOAG GAY MEN HAVING SEX?! NSFW?! MINORS DNI?! Or not idgaf THERES PLOT FIRST BECAUSE UHH

"Fufu-chaaaaan," Uki whines softly, a smile playing on his lips. "Can you give me a kiss?"

"Uki, we're on stream," Fulgar laughs and elicits another drawn out sigh from the Psychic. "We're on call with the others."

"Yeah save it for later," Alban jokes light-heartedly. Sonny makes an agreeing noise.

Uki whines a bit more before going silent. The rest of them continue their conversations with one another. Little did the others know that Uki and Fulgar were actually in the same house together. They decided to meet each other IRL and was planning to do an off-collab. The two hit off right away, conversations full of laughter and affection.

"Fufu-chan, you're so cute," Uki mumbles, leaning back in his chair and his head resting on the headrest. His eyes began to flutter. "Very cute."

"Well, you're cuter Ukiki," Fulgar laughs and Uki could hear him from the other room. Uki smiles gently. "Remember to drink some water and eat some food, yeah?"

Uki murmurs a "mhm" before his eyes flutter shut. The talk of his friends became like background music to him and he began to nod off. The others haven't realized just yet until the Comfydants began asking questions.

"Hey, Uki, are you alright? I just realized when the Comfydants kept asking heavily."

"Uki?"

Startled awake upon hearing his name, Uki sits up and sits straight, rubbing his eye. He says with a drowsy and drunken tone, "Huh yeah?"

"Were you sleeping?"

"Yeah, sorry... you guys were just talking and I feel asleep. Like, background music. I think I might've dozed off for a few..."

Fulgar nods. "Uki, would you like to end your stream and just chill in mine? Or if you're really tired, you can just end stream and go rest."

"...yeah." Uki mumbles, agreeing to the first option.

"Alright, alright," Fulgar replies softly. "Whenever you feel like you need to go, I'll continue or just end stream."

The crew say their goodbyes and Uki goes to Fulgar's stream. They talk for a good half an hour, and Fulgar notices how sleepy Uki seems.

"Uki..." he starts with a chuckle. "Are you sure you don't want to sleep?"

"'M fine," Uki responds, all the while with a yawn. "I want to stay and talk to you more, Fu-chan..."

"You can later. you need to rest. I will end this stream," Fulgar threatens, but he says it with a smile on his lips.

Uki sighs heavily. "At least give me a kiss first."

"I will if you listen first."

Uki rolls his eyes with a laugh. "Fine."

Fulgar waits until Uki logs off completely. He talks to his Comfydants a bit more before finally saying his farewells. He switches off and removes his headphones. He rises to his feet and stretches for a moment.

He opens the door carefully and walks out the room. They booked a hotel together for a good couple of days. It was a nice place, and they got separate rooms. The two mostly spent their time in the living room, where they would relax with each other. Fulgar enjoyed his time with Uki; the Psychic had such a soothing prescence and never once made the Cyborg feel uncomfortable. In fact, he felt very at home with Uki. And he always made sure to let Uki know that. Uki was very dear to Fulgar, and he always wanted to make sure Uki was okay as a whole.

He steps close to Uki's door, rapping the wood with his knuckles gently. A slurred, "come in" answered and Fulgar enters. He finds the purple-haired man laying on his bed, a hand to his forehead. As Fulgar approaches him, he sees a flush to Uki's cheeks. Fulgar stands over Uki with a chuckle, Uki watching him with soft and bleary eyes.

"Now, where's my kiss, Fufu-chan?" Uki asks, letting his hand rest on his chest now.

"Yes yes, you're getting the kiss you oh-so deserved." Fulgar leans down with a playful grin, his lips brushing against Uki's forehead for a brief moment. He quickly stood back up and turned his back, his heart rate strangely increasing and a heat to his cheeks. "Well, good night Uki. Have a nice rest."

His metal hand wraps around the door knob and he was just about to open the door when the Psychic calls out quietly, "Fufu-chan."

Fulgar turns his head, cocking it to the side. "Yes?"

Uki gazes at him for a good minute, his expression blank. He whines softly, "Can you stay? just until I fall asleep?"

"...oh." Fulgar blushes a tad, smiling affectionately. He expected it, but also didn't quite expect it either. "Of course. Anything for you, babe."

Uki laughs and turns on his side to watch Fulgar places himself in the chair at Uki's desk, where Uki was previously streaming. His pretty eyes twinkle and crinkle a bit, obviously finding Fulgar endearing. It was kind of hard to connect to someone on such a level, but here he was, wanting to be with one person and that person was Fulgar Ovid.

"Would you like me to sing a lullaby?" Fulgar teases, resting a elbow on the armrest with a expressive wave of his hand.

"Thatd be nice, actually," Uki smirks, his hair falling in his face.

Another chortle from Fulgar as he opens his mouth to sing a sweet melody just for Uki Violeta.

Uki woke first, groaning softly as he turns onto his back. He lays there for awhile, eyes closed as he breathes, his slight migraine subsiding with each exhale. Uki hears another set of breaths and he opens an eye. Fulgar sat in his chair, fast asleep. Slightly leaning to the left, arms on arms rest and his legs crossed at the ankles. Fulgar's expression is peaceful and at ease, soft snores filling the air. Uki smiles at the sight, the sweet and funny Cyborg sleeping in the same room as him with such a sweet expression.

Uki rolls out of bed quietly and tiptoes to Fulgar. He stands in front of him, just observing him. His ruffled clothes, his smooth hair that covered his eyes, his jawline, his partly opened mouth. God, never has Uki wanted to kiss someone so bad before. His heart races at the thought of it, and his cheeks flame a bit.

'He wouldn't want to kiss me,' he thought to himself, leaning down so his face was level with Fulgar's. 'Although he did give me a goodnight kiss, I don't think it was anything more... but I wish it was.'

Uki brushes Fulgar's hair out his face, his fingertips trailing down to his jaw and then cupping his face with one hand. It fit perfectly in his palm he noted, rubbing gentle circles against Fulgar's cheek bone. The Cyborg makes a small sound and it takes all of Uki's will to not recoil immediately. He was afraid he had waken him up, but Fulgar just shifts, towards Uki's touch with a content exhale.

Uki's heart swells. Oh. My. God. He presses his lips together to stop a related squawk from slipping past his lips. Holy shit, this man was fucking adorable!

Uki wanted to return the kiss from last night suddenly. (Or rather, he just wanted an excuse to have contact with Fulgar's skin with his lips.) He inches closer to Fulgar's face, anxiety creeping in. The Psychic swallows hard, blushing profusely. He stayed a few good centimeters away from Fulgar's lips and was debating whether or not to go for it.

Uki inwardly sighs, deciding against kissing Fulgar because thatd be one hell of a ride if Fulgar suddenly woke up and found Uki... well. you know. Uki raises his head a few inches and presses his lips against Fulgar's forehead gently.

A hand seizes Uki's wrist, causing Uki to make a sort of strangled sound as he jerks back. A sleepy, but now awake, Fulgar narrows his eyes at Uki, who now looked like he was caught red-handed.

"Uki, what were you doing?"

"Uh... I..." Uki desperately tried to find the right words without sounding like a complete idiot. Cheeks bright red and slightly sweating. "How long were you awake?"

"The moment you woke up. I heard you groan."

'Well, fuck me,' Uki thought, cursing himself.

Fulgar studies Uki for a moment, then moves Uki's hand back to his face again. Uki stares, surprised, as Fulgar smirks. "Uki, you need to learn boundaries. However, since it's you..."

He sits up and leans close to Uki's face. "I don't mind what you do to me."

Hard. Hard as a fucking diamond.

"You don't?" Uki asks, without complaint going along with whatever was happening. He brings Fulgar's face close. "What if I decided to kiss you right now?"

The Cyborg's gaze slides away, cheeks burning. His gaze slides back and he tilts his head. "I'd let you."

So Uki went for it.

Uki's lips brush against Fulgar's own, hesitantly. He felt anxiety wracking his body because what if Fulgar suddenly realized, this isn't what he wanted? That he didn't want Uki?

Fulgar must've felt his distress because he takes Uki's face with his cold metal hands, deepening the kiss. He pulls the Pyschic into him, Uki having no choice but to sit himself in his lap. Not that Uki minded, not one bit.

Uki's other hand runs through Fulgar's hair, and Fulgar hums happily. He would have never thought Uki's lips were so soft, like he was kissing angel's wings. Fulgar suddenly wanted to taste him further, his left hand grasping the back of Uki's neck carefully as he nips at Uki's lower lip.

Uki immediately knows what Fulgar wants and opens his mouth and they make out passionately, Fulgar's tongue dancing with Uki's at a fiery pace. Uki can't help but moan into the open-mouthed kiss, pressing himself close to Fulgar.

They break away for a moment, panting. "Uki," Fulgar breathes, his hands finding refuge on Uki's hips as he rises. Uki wraps his legs around Fulgar's waist as he falls back onto his bed with Fulgar in tow.

"Yes?" Uki exhales, chest rising up and down quickly.

"I want you. So bad."

"You have me."

Fulgar dives towards Uki's neck, kissing down to his shoulder as Uki's breath hitches. He notices Uki's mole and gives it a hot kiss, making Uki shiver. Underneath the Psychic's jaw, he sucks on the skin, creating a hickey and several more on both sides of Uki's neck.

"Fu-chan," Uki says breathlessly, his arms around Fulgar's neck. He buries his face in Fulgar's neck and he can feel Fulgar's laugh reverberate through his chest.

"Getting all shy with me now, Ukiki?"

"Shut up bitch."

Fulgar, out of nowhere, hisses. He didn't realize one of Uki's arms left his neck, instead Uki's hand palming his hardened erection. He grunts, almost bucking his hips into Uki's hand.

"Look at you. So needy," Uki teases, a smirk on his puffy lips from kissing. Fulgar releases a growl, tugging on Uki's shirt.

"Off. Now," he orders.

Uki giggles, sitting up to remove his shirt. "Yours too."

Fulgar wasted no time in doing so, to crawl right back on Uki once more. He kisses Uki hard, then goes to give kisses on his neck, his collarbone, his chest, his stomach, all he way down...

Uki makes a noise right as Fulgar pauses above the obvious tent in his pants, grinning devilishly. "Where would you like me to kiss next, babe? here?"

Fulgar kisses his waist, watching Uki's heated expression. "Here?" He kisses Uki's inner thigh, but not quite where Uki needed it most.

Uki raises his hips, giving a soft whine. "Fu-chan..."

"Hm? What's wrong darling?" Uki's breath hitches. "Cat got your tongue? Youll have to speak up if you want me to give you want you want."

"I want you to... kiss me..."

"Mm?"

"Kiss me right..." Uki places his hand on his hard-on. "Here."

"Say pretty please."

"Please, Fu-chan. I need you..."

"Alright, alright." Fulgar hooks his finger into one of the hooks of Uki's sweatpants, dragging it down slowly. Uki raises his hips once more, and the pants slide down to his ankles. Fulgar, agonizingly slow, pulls down Uki's boxers and Uki's cock springs to attention, the tip an angry red. "Look how hard you are for me, how cute..."

Uki whimpers as Fulgar wraps a hand around Uki's pulsing dick, giving a few pumps as pre-cum beads on his tip. He seems to be admiring the work of art before him, and Uki squirms.

Fulgar takes the tip in his mouth, his tongue swirling around it and kitten licking the pre-cum. Uki lets out a soft moan, his stomach quivering in anticipation. Fulgar chuckles at the sight, licking his cock up and down all while keeping eye contact with the man he's about to go down on.

Finally, he puts the entirety of the Psychic's cock into his mouth, hollowing his cheeks and tongue flat against his tip. Fulgar begins to bob his head up and down, at a slow pace at first, before quickening. His tongue traces a vein that goes down Uki's shaft and Uki moans.

"Oh fuck... babe you feel so-" A louder moan interrupts what the Psychic was going to say. "Mph- so g-good... oh shit..."

Fulgar chortles, sending electricity up Uki's spine. He could feel something coiling and tightening in his lower abdomen. Holy shit, Fulgar's mouth felt like heaven! Uki couldn't help but jolt at the pleasure he was feeling, moaning between his fingers as his other hand grips Fulgar's hair. Twisting and licking and sucking... oh god.

"'M gonna cum," Uki moans. "Doing such a- mm! Great job- a-ah...!"

Fulgar moans against Uki's cock and that just about does it. Uki lets out a noise, unloading himself into Fulgar's hot mouth. Fulgar swallows greedily, licking the shaft clean as Uki shakes, breathing hard.

"God, you're so fucking perfect," Fulgar practically growls, going back up to capture Uki's mouth in another heated kiss. Uki could taste himself on Fulgar's tongue and it groans into his mouth. "Need to feel you..."

He sits back, yanking off his pants harshly and discards of the useless thing at the moment, his cock erected. Uki almost drooled at the sight, a shuddered sigh escaping his lips as he reaches over to pull the drawer beside the bed out. Uki grabs a bottle of lube as Fulgar crawls back on top of him.

"It's almost as if you knew this was going to happen," Fulgar muses.

"I'm a Psychic. Of course I'd knew this would happen," Uki purrs and it takes all of Fulgar's strength to not just shove himself inside Uki right now.

"Sneaky whore, huh?"

"Your sneaky whore, yes."

Fulgar takes the bottle of lube and squeezes the contents into his hand. He spreads Uki's legs wide, letting the lube drip down his fingers for a moment before tracing Uki's hole with it. Uki shivers at how cold it is and Fulgar laughs deeply. He continues circling a moment before sliding two fingers inside.

Uki arches off the bed a little as Fulgar pumps his fingers in and out of him, stretching Uki out. Uki pants as he does so, sweat clinging to his skin. Fulgar watches with fascination and Uki's hole swallows his fingers again and again, prepping the Psychic for what was about to happen.

"Hmm, think that's perfect, no?" Fulgar asks, and not waiting for a response, puts his tip at Uki's entrance and enters. Completely sheathing himself in Uki's warmth.

"Fuck!" Uki cries out, his arms snaking around and digging slightly into Fulgar's back.

Fulgar groans, "Oh, you're so fucking warm. Shit. You're squeezing around me..."

Fulgar sits inside Uki for a moment, letting Uki adjust to Fulgar's rather large size. After a moment, he begins to move, in and out slowly, his hands on either side of Uki's head. Uki whimpers underneath him, reveling in the feeling of Fulgar's dick inside him for so long. He could feel Fulgar's veins and his shaft pulsating in his walls.

"Faster," Uki gasps.

"Beg. Beg me to go faster," Fulgar breathes, his eyes dark with lust.

"Please please please, faster faster faster-"

Fulgar's hips snap forward and a noise escapes Uki's mouth. His pace is quick, just like what Uki requested, but not hard enough to bruise. The idea of hurting Uki made his heart squeeze, and it went both ways as Uki dropped his hands back to the mattress. Fulgar intertwines his fingers in the man's fingers underneath him, breathing heavy as passionate moans and gasps fill the air.

"Uki," Fulgar chants underneath his breath, biting down on the Psychic's neck and leaving behind another gift for Uki.

"F-Fulgar!" Uki exclaims, small tears at the edges of his eyes. Not because of the stretch, no, he fucking loved that because of the pleasure causing his toes to curl and the heat to build up in his stomach. "M close!"

"So am- I-I, darling," Fulgar moans, kissing Uki's ear lobes as Uki sinks his teeth into Fulgar's neck. "Fuck, you're doing wonderful, my darling. C-cum for me now. You got this- taking me so fucking well."

Fulgar's praises help send Uki over the edge, cumming all over his stomach as Fulgar grunts, spilling his seed inside Uki. The hot warmth suddenly in Uki's guts cause him to whine quietly. It felt so good.

Fulgar's arms shake as he pulls out, plopping beside Uki with heavy breaths. Uki turns his head to admire the man before him, his breaths quick. His albino hair frames his face, sweat sheen across his brow. Uki reaches a hand, cupping Fulgar's cheek. Fulgar rests his hand on Uki's.

"That was perfect," Uki murmurs.

"You're perfect, Uki," Fulgar sighs, observing Uki. "You're so fucking beautiful." He glances down. "So let me clean you up, yeah?"

"And I'll help too-"

"No, no, let me spoil you." Fulgar gets up and walks to the bathroom to retrieve a towel.

Uki props himself up with an arm, smiling affectionately at Fulgar's ass as he sauntered off.

Yup, this is his man alright 💜

[valoisfulcanellideux]

We've got a few things to unpack…

It's becoming more and more clear that Empires Season 2 is winding down. People are finalising builds (and, in Pix's case with that massive castle, practically speedrunning builds), and I'm beginning to see things that are tying together little threads that have been teased throughout the season.

Now, I've not had time to keep up with everyone's episodes of late, as I've been so busy, so mainly I've been watching Pix and Sausage. And Sausage's episode today had some very interesting stuff in it, so let's unpack and analyse some of it. Any bolding is mine, to denote things to pay attention to.

This will be long, so behind the cut with you!

First up, something seemingly small: the tattoos that both he and Scott have. Scott's are, as to be expected, colourful. Sausage's are a mixture of his 'good self' and his 'bad self' now merged back into one after being split asunder in Season 1:

Sausage: "And yes, I do have tattoos; I've had them for a very long time. The only thing, though: they have changed a little bit. [I] pretty much just had a sunflower tattoo, and I've had that for a very long time, but ever since that merger happened [it] looks like my other self had this… almost like a withering vine kind of tattoo. but it looks pretty cool, though! It's a perfect mixture, actually. Huh, look at that. These are pretty special."

He then goes to meet Scott, and it turns out that their tattoos almost match when put together, forming the shape of a heart:

Also of note: when Sausage and Scott go to Tumble Town for their 'beach relaxation' they find a cod statue in the river. And we all know already that the Mezalean King came back briefly to build something in Tumble Town.

Next, the new castle in Sanctuary. It's a blend of several things:

Sausage: "This is a pretty special castle. If you really notice, it's really not like a traditional castle, and now that I'm whole again, it has technically a mixture of both my selves. A little bit of the bad side in the base [points to deepslate foundations] going up to the good side on the top [pointing at wood and colour and foliage]… the base is a little reminiscent of a previous Kingdom, if you noticed. Also mixing in the styles here of Sanctuary with this wood bit; nice brick roofs here on the side towers. And then the top bit; I took some inspiration from our sun god right here: Bdoubleo100. Almost like a little Oriental flair there to the top."

It's also called The Castle of Memories.

I'm going to skip ahead a bit here, as there was something else he mentioned when examining the build:

Sausage: "Of course, we've got window pop-outs everywhere, overgrown going all the way to the top […] We've got the lovely planters over here with live coral and a nice overgrown feel around the side."

Note that he says "overgrown going all the way to the top" and not "overgrowth". And live coral? Hello, Ocean Empire?

So, we now have Mezalea, the Cod Empire, Mythland, the Ocean Empire, and - possibly - House Blossom (the Overgrown) in Season 2.

Now back to the initial reveal of the castle:

Sausage: "And, as we come on down, I think it's a really cool mix of everything we've done here so far. Also including some bits of what we haven't seen yet…"

Hello? Sir, HELLO? Copper? And aged copper, at that? In addition, it's something that "we haven't seen yet"?

I first watched this episode on my phone, and freaked out when I saw the copper. Watching it again on my monitor, I can now see that the copper is a wheel, much like the one in Bdub's base on Hermitcraft. But, since I doubt that anything more will come from the crossover on the Hermit's side of things I'm not sure whether the shape of the copper has significance, or if it's only the copper itself that has meaning.

Which leads us to Pix. The man is frantically completing an incredible castle ruin at the Ancient Capital, and - if you've been watching his streams - you'll know what the Ancient Capital actually was in its past. If you haven't been watching, you can read my transcription of the important sections here.

Warning for spoilers ahead, as Pix hasn't revealed this yet in his episodes…

… … … …

SPOILERS - LAST CHANCE TO STOP READING!

… … … …

OK, so the Ancient Capital was built by some of the different empires' survivors of the great Grimlands blast that ended Season 1, coming together to create a new "capital of commerce and technology" (to quote Pix). Parts of the castle are being built in Grimlands style, and Pix had begun another part that he says will probably be built in Crystal Cliffs style.

Remember when he said [paraphrased, as I don't have the exact quote to hand right now] "As to how ancient Pixandrian technology found its way here… trust the Lore Man,"? In that transcribed stream he also confirmed that Pixandrian migrants brought the technology for their copper aging facility to the Ancient Capital, which is why it's more advanced than the one he had in Season 1.

So we now also have Grimlands, Crystal Cliffs, and Pixandria in Season 2. Gilded Helianthia is also a given, with the Ancient Capital statue and paintings, and all the references to Santa Pearla. The Lost Empire is also kind of referenced, in the form of Gaia, Sausage's mount for Season 2, as well as in Lizzie's origin story.

ETA: Reblog tags have reminded me that we also have the Undergrove, which has been referenced back to in Shelby's videos.

Pix himself is now a ghost, having withered away when wearing the crown (more mentions of withering, hailing back to Pearl's death in S1, the flowers in front of Pearl's painting that hides the route down to the Kings' Crypt in the Ancient Capital having also turned into wither roses, and - of course - Sausage's "bad side" withering tattoos).

Pix's own words about being a ghost:

Pix: "Maybe the archaeologist of the Ancient Capital and the creator/curator of the museum was… a piece of the past himself all along. Either way, I still have a lot to do."

Like... maybe - as the server's unofficial DM - saving the world or 'ending the game', as he was unable to do in Season 1? Because there's still the matter of the king who has been pursuing Sausage, and who - at the end of his latest episode - has finally found where Sausage has been hiding...

The only Season 1 empire that we're now missing a reference to is Rivendell. And I'm wondering if that's where the Fae come in.

People… Season 2 is being tied together beautifully with Season 1, and I'm fucking HERE FOR IT.

(Also, as a side-note on a personal level: I spent this morning frantically scribbling notes for how the eventual ending of my story These Stones Remember will take place. Those notes really ramp up the time-crossing between archaologist!Pix and CopperKing!Paix, and I am going slightly crazy (/pos) at the thought that my favourite content creators appear to be blending past and future in a similar way that I am!)

[trulybetty]

Sunday Week in Review XI

This week's header is dedicated to @legendary-pink-dot for the idea of Dieter being his own 80s sitcom 😝💕

Is everyone okay this morning? Have we all recovered from last night? Do we need to hydrate, grab a snack (not that kind of snack) and recoup? Any welfare checks we need to send out? Phew 🫠

It's been a slog to get through this week, and I didn't get to as much reading as I wanted, which you'll see below. These daily prompts have been taking up more time than I expected and work has picked up (rude). But I'm also realising as I read through people's weekly round-ups, that I've missed a lot this week that I haven't seen come across my dash.

So if you've posted something this week (fanfic, thots or anything else) and you'd like to share it - feel free to drop it in my DM's or as an Asks!

T R U L Y  U P D A T E S . . .

oct' x 15 - first wine (sequins!joel x reader)

oct' x 16 - flying kites (frankie x reader)

oct' x 17 - whispers (chiffon!dieter x bryony)

oct' x 18 - picking apples (sequins!joel x reader)

oct' x 19 - ghosts (dieter x f!reader)

oct' x 20 - sweater weather (chiffon!dieter x bryony)

oct' x 21 - acorns (tim rockford x f!reader)

birthdays, besties & bravos (celebrating the lovely @wildemaven)

W H A T  I  R E A D . . .

A Safe Haven | Chapter 9 (Joel) (Check TW’s) by @joelsgreys This was the update I've been so patiently waiting for and it did not disappoint! This is a fantastic series that I never thought I'd get so emotionally invested in - but that's how good Vee is! This is always one of my top recommendations when suggesting Joel fanfics to read!

Working Title | Chapter 14 (Dieter) by @rhoorl Another great update for Dieter and Belle - I'm rooting for these two from the sidelines and I'm exciting to see how things play out for them!

Delta Landscaping | Chapter 8 (Triple Frontier + Pedro Characters) by @rhoorl Okay, there's not one, but two Pedro Character appearances this week and I'm trying to figure out how I can move to Mule Falls Court like yesterday - because it's all going down over there and I highly recommend this be added to your reading if you haven't read it yet. A Month of Sundays (Various) by @gnpwdrnwhiskey I'm living for all of these prompts and I can't choose one or two because they've all been soooo good!

M E M O R A B L E  P O S T S . . .

I'm on edge as @for-a-longlongtime shares more of their WIP that is Peña x Rockford x Reader, with that line up you know it's going to be good!

Self Care with Dieter & Jett (@morallyinept) - this week it's emotions and highlights some important stuff!

More Dieter and his hippo table shenanigans delivered by @i-love-movies to @gnpwdrnwhiskey, this made my week 🤣

B R O U G H T  T H E  J O Y . . .

Bit of a personal one, but we got to do a little Halloween festive trip out yesterday with the little Truly's. Something you're not always able to do when you have a child with extra needs, as events such as these can be a bit overwhelming for a multitude of reasons. So when we're able to attend ones that are specially catered for families like ours, it's always a special occasion - even if it does make you realise how unfit you are wrangling two kids 🤣 Also, keeping on brand, Baby Truly adored all the Halloween decor and was waving and saying hello to her minions the props.

Watched the new Goosebumps on Disney+ not expecting much, and I actually enjoyed it. Little Betty would have been all over this as a kid.

Also, watched my annual viewing of Practical Magic, which thanks to the wonders of the digital age I own to stream to my heart's content regardless of the season.

T H I S  W E E K ' S  J A M . . .

Back in my Matchbox Twenty feels this week 💛 - this one has been in heavy rotation while writing!

Hope everyone has had a great week! Here's to a new week ahead! Hopefully, if Pedro makes another appearance we'll all be ready for it, or at least recovered by then! 😝🫠

Happy Sunday all! ☀️💛

[agentnico]

Blue Eye Samurai - Season 1 (2023) Review

Don't think I've ever seen so much human genitalia in animated form all in one go. Makes me wonder if the production team had a designated animator of genitals who literally just spent his time drawing penises for the show. If so, I hope it was Jonah Hill as he already proved in Superbad that he is the perfect artist for this subject.

Plot: Driven by a dream of revenge against those who made her an outcast in Edo-period Japan, a young warrior cuts a bloody path toward her destiny.

Netflix consistently hashes out so much content every week, that it is hard to keep up with any of it, as such many great projects get missed and are forever lost in the streamer's endless library void. Luckily Blue Eye Samurai didn't pass my scrolling and evidently has its fan base, as this is one of the quickest examples of the streaming giant announcing a season renewal after release. Yep, Blue Eye Samurai will be getting a second season which is amazing as this is a superb new series that if you haven't yet discovered then you are doing yourself a disservice and should amend that behaviour immediately and go watch it! Still need persuading? Alright, sit yourself down and allow me to gush about Blue Eye Samurai!...

It’s hard to overstate just how stunning Blue Eye Samurai is to look at. The series uses a mix of 2D and 3D animation styles to create landscapes and characters who seem only a few degrees removed from live-action, even as the form allows for combat on a scale that would cost several large fortunes to craft with flesh-and-blood actors. In fact, looking at the behind-the-scenes the team hired an actual martial arts choreographer to support in creating the combat sequences in real life with real people, and then the movements of those fights were transferred to animation and used in the final product. In one episode (seemingly inspired by the 1978 martial arts film Enter the Game of Death where Bruce Lee had to fight his way up to the tower to get to the last floor) the main samurai Mizu must defeat multiple bosses on each level of the season's big bad Fowler’s impregnable fortress home, and each separate battle is a work of art in itself. Honestly, the show just looks like a moving painting, with every frame absolutely jaw-dropping gorgeous. Even without dialogue or characterization, it would be completely engrossing.

Luckily, writers Michael Green and Amber Noizumi are as interested in the people at the center of these crazy fights as they are in the many improbable techniques Mizu uses against her opponents. Mizu is presented throughout as both supernatural and deeply human. She can handle any odds, and come back from every injury that would cripple or kill a normal person. But the series never loses sight of what a life wholly devoted to revenge has cost her, and the ways in which she has turned herself into every bit the monster that her countrymen believe her to be.

It is then also the exploration of how Mizu interacts with the other characters in this world. There's the disabled would-be apprentice Ringo (played warmly by Masi Oka), who has learned to navigate life despite his lumbering size and lack of hands. Mizu has no interest in a sidekick, but Ringo gradually wears her down, as if he’s a peaceful stream flowing against a rock over hundreds of years. There's also Taigen (Darren Barnett), a warrior chasing after Mizu to collect a debt of honour, yet due to this honour he ends up helping her as in his eyes only he has the right to kill her, no one else, so ends up attacking those that attempt to harm her. Brenda Song voices the princess Akemi, who is just as eager to escape the bonds of Edo society as Mizu is, but who uses very different methods to achieve that. We follow her journey through an intimate tour of the area brothels, which is where the aforementioned heaviness of nudity comes in. There is, in fact, a lot of naked flesh on display throughout the season. The series can be just as graphic in depicting sex as it is in violence, yet both avoid feeling gratuitous. And finally, there's Kenneth Branagh as this season's big bad Fowler, a despicable arms dealer who has no sense of morality or empathy and is willing to destroy anything standing in his path. He's a massive presence and seemingly the only one able to hold himself in a fight against Mizu, hence why Branagh's British snark yet heavy tone fits perfectly here.

The whole thing is an incredible, utterly badass example of how animation can be used to create worlds, characters, and adventure every bit as vivid as live-action if not more at times. Even though I would say there are a few areas of pacing issues, which withheld me from binging this season all in one go and instead had me taking regular break intervals throughout, this is still a stellar show and one that you can tell was created by a team of passionate filmmakers and artists. Blue Eye Samurai would never have had the impact it did had it been live-action - using animation as its storytelling medium elevated it to a masterpiece in my opinion. Kudos to everyone involved in such an amazing project and I can’t WAIT to see more!

Overall score: 8/10

[colderdrafts]

3: A pleasant discussion

Underground visitor, gn reader x monster (male drider). Sfw. Previous Next

You awake some time later, not exactly sure when given you still can’t tell the difference from your eyes being opened or closed. You fumble around blindly until your palm connects with the cool metal of your lantern. You wince at the contrast when you light it, your eyes previously adjusted to the abyssal gloom.

Everything seems still as you glance around the odd room, and you don't spot Dren anywhere. He must already be up and about, content to let you sleep.

You roll out from the hole in the ground and stretch, wincing as your muscles are a bit sore from both the 'roughhousing' last night, and the somewhat tough padding. You feel something sticking to your face and gingerly peel off a stray cobweb that has somehow lodged itself to your cheek as you slept.

"How long was I out?" you ponder quietly to yourself and stifle a yawn.

"Approximately 6 hours," Dren replies and you almost jump out of your skin. The voice came from above.

Surely enough, you look up to find Dren’s upper body poking out from a hole above the one you slept in, front spider legs casually resting on the edge.

"Please don't do that," you breathe. "I’m not awake enough for jumpscares."

"Apologies," Dren says. "What's a 'jumpscare'?"

You frown. "A scare so startling you jump, I guess."

"Do you have words for all of that? For example, if you're afraid and you hide, is it a 'hide-scare'? Or if you run, is it a 'run-scare'?" he asks, seemingly genuinely intrigued.

"No, that's not - hm. It's not, but maybe it should be."

"Maybe it should."

You're honestly too tired for wordplay right now, so you change the subject. "How do you tell the time down here without sunlight? Like, is it morning right now? I can't tell."

Dren cogs his head. "Oh, that's usually not necessary to think about."

You frown at him. "'Usually not necessary'?"

"Well, unless I have to go do trading and interact with the common-folk, they prefer doing exchanges with me at sunrise. Otherwise, no. I sleep when I'm tired, and wake when I'm not."

You suppose spending most of your time in pitch blackness would do that to a person.

"But - you can tell?" you press.

"I can. It is not yet sunrise."

"Then what am I doing up?" you groan, rubbing your eyes.

Dren laughs. "You're already adjusting."

You spend the early morning finding water to wash up some of the grime from yesterday’s escapades. You follow the stream as Dren explained to you, thankfully also illuminated so you can watch your step, lest you fall in. The stream comes from a small outcropping of rock that Dren has tunneled past, and he has since followed the source of the water to dig it out. There’s a smooth transition between the hard patterned soil and stone. The water is cold, but clean.

Feeling refreshed, you trek back to the living room.

Dren has actually lit the fireplace while you were at the stream, and it spreads a pleasant warmth in the room. You also notice he has taken the liberty of tying up your drenched clothes to dry in some silky threads hanging from the ceiling in front of it.

"I'm afraid I haven't much to offer, though I managed to scavenge some oats last night if you're hungry?" Dren offers, looking at you over his shoulder as you walk in.

You once again nod your thanks and soon you're settled on a sheepskin with a cup full of oatmeal. Dren's lounging across from you again fiddling with a piece of webbing.

"Are you not having anything?" you ask in between mouthfuls. It's very bland, but you should probably take what you can get here.

"Oh, I already ate, not to worry," Dren replies without looking up from the webbing in his hands.

You watch him fiddling for a moment, deftly weaving the silky thread between his fingers to no particular avail, and then somehow managing to uncoil the sticky threads again to start over. He always seem to keep his hands busy for some reason.

"Can I ask you something?"

He looks up. "Of course. Go ahead."

"You don't seem to have use for them really, so why do you have all these things like clothes, cups and stuff?" you ask, gesturing vaguely at yourself and the utensil in you hands. "How did you get them?"

"Trespassers," Dren shrugs.

"You stole their clothes?" you grin at the prospect.

He chuckles. "Ah, no. I killed them. Their clothes were just left behind."

You were about to lift a spoonful to your mouth though it remains resting in the cup as your hands lock up. You're subtly try to discern if he’s joking or not, though he appears pleasantly nonchalant as if it's the most reasonable thing on the planet, gently weaving the thread in his hands in and out. His lower body silently rubs its front legs together.

You glance over at the pile of neatly folded clothes in the corner, and suddenly the soft shirt currently keeping you warm itches a little bit.

That's a lot of trespassers.

Dren cogs his head at you and frowns in concern, sensing your unease. "Is something the matter?"

"It's just - I thought you said not a lot of people come down here?" you deflect, shoveling in another spoonful to avoid speaking lest your voice shakes and gives you away.

"Not a lot of guests," he corrects you gently. "Others intrude here once in a while. Mostly thieves, hunters or snatchers after my eggs."

You really don't want to talk about this anymore, but given you've just discovered you're in the same room as a cold-blooded murderer, you should probably do something to ensure yourself a little better. Dren has already assured you you're a guest, so that should mean you're safe, right?

Right. Again.

"Well, I should thank you for the hospitality," you say, politely changing the subject, "even after my intrusion."

Dren waves it off. "Think nothing of it. After all, I shouldn’t have made ill assumptions of your intentions while blinded by anger. Letting you stay is the least I can do. Besides-" he shifts, folding his legs to his sides and getting to a more comfortable sitting position. When he looks at you again the gaze is full of warmth. "It's been years since I've just sat down and had a pleasant discussion. I appreciate the company."

"..No problem," you say, clumsily.

You hadn't expected a heartfelt comment like that.

Well if he's having a good time it seems you're not leaving this world just yet. At least there's that.

"Years?" you ask, prompting him to elaborate to ease your tension. "What about family? Friends?"

"My kind tend to keep to themselves, mostly," he responds, once again twisting the webbing in his hands. "Especially from our own. We mostly only interact with our young, and whenever we pass by a potential mate. Even that is very brief and we go our separate ways as soon as we can."

"But then - how did you get your eggs?" you ask, but catch yourself. "Well, I shouldn't assume-"

"Oh," Dren grins. "You're fine. No, I cannot lie them myself. I had to fight their mother for custody because she wouldn't give them up."

You gape at him. "You fought her?"

Isn't that like. A whole thing, with female spiders being a lot bigger and meaner and very much into the whole widowy-business? Maybe it's different for driders. You briefly try and imagine a creature like Dren but larger and even more imposing. It's not pleasant.

"I was not confident she would look after them properly. I had to," Dren says, serious. "They are very vulnerable at this stage, they need to be protected. Taken care of."

"Well, then it's good you won. You obviously care about them a lot."

"I always do. These are my third brood," he smiles.

"You thought I had stolen your eggs," you realize, speaking somewhat cautiously in case that's a touchy subject. "Does that mean-?"

Dren’s smile falters as he looks away for a bit and sighs. "Yes. I- I have not been vigilant enough this time."

It’s odd seeing him so on edge on something like that, and yet being so indifferent to the lives of whoever enters here unbidden. He has killed, but he is also a parent. Perhaps killing is simply just viewed differently in this world. You don’t exactly know what to make of that.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought it up-" you start but he lifts a hand to stop you.

"No, it's alright. I've lost some along the way, but that's just how it is with these things. The ones who made it are roaming around somewhere in the world far from here. I take solace in knowing I could give most of them a good start," Dren says, though he's still clearly affected by it. He looks back to you, considering for a moment. "This time, though - I was starving. I had to go hunting. I was only gone for a few hours. But when I came back 8 of my 11 young were gone."

You cover your mouth in shock. You can't imagine what it must be like to lose 8 of your children. "Dren, that's horrible. I'm so sorry."

His lower body chitters as he rubs his face and huffs. "Thank you. It's very odd. I keep my eggs very well hidden within the system. I almost tore this place apart searching for them once I realized they were gone, but the thieves had somehow managed to navigate my tunnels and leave quicker than anyone ever has before them. I've lost one or two in scuffles before, sure, but they've never just vanished like that."

That is odd. But with such a big system, wouldn't there be lots of opportunities to hide? "Maybe they didn't leave while you were gone," you offer.

Dren looks at you. "What do you mean?"

"I mean - maybe they managed to remain hidden in your system while you were in here? And slip past you?"

You worry for a second if you've offended him as he frowns, but he purses his lips, mandibles moving a bit in thought. "They would have passed by my webs. I would have felt them moving about if we were here simultaneously. It's how I knew you were here."

"Webs?” you ask, perplexed. “Aren't they only on the ceiling?"

"You'd think so, wouldn't you?" Dren hums with a smile.

You frown and instinctively glance around on the floor, trying to spot any stray silky threads or cobwebs, but you really see nothing. It looks like just a well-kept and intricately carved-out dirt floor. Even if see-through, wouldn't the silky strands at least reflect the light of the fireplace or a lantern?

Unless..

"The carved patterns," you realize out loud, and look to him for confirmation. "They're not just for show, are they?"

"They also serve as very efficient deceivers of the eye," Dren nods, pleased. "Look at you uncovering all my secrets. You catch on quickly."

You guess that's pretty clever. Anyone who ventured in here would most likely assume the same, and not know the resident in this dwelling would know of their presence and location the second they ventured inside. A fatal mistake that, judging from the small pile of treasures in the corner, has been made many times.

But it's also a good point. You'd think with how quickly he sniffed you out he'd be breathing down the snatchers' necks too. They must how found some way to avoid setting anything off.

“But enough about all of that dreary business,” Dren says, stretching his arms above his head before settling back down and focusing on you. “Tell me of where you came from. I’m curious.”

“Well-”

You start vaguely, explaining briefly what you used to do back home, the area you lived in, general small talk stuff. Dren encourages you however, asking for details and elaborations, generally urging you to keep talking. It’s a little odd to be in the spotlight like that, and you try multiple times to stop and pass on the conversational baton, only to be politely handed it back. Eventually you’re in a full monologue about your home, your friends, your family, to the point where Dren can name your neighbor’s obnoxious dog that barks late at night.

Other than brief encouragements, Dren has stayed silent, just attentively taking in your every word.

“You can’t seriously be entertained by me yapping on anymore,” you laugh after a while. “I’ve been talking for a decade.”

“Quite the contrary,” Dren says. “This is a whole new world I’m hearing about. I’d be a fool to not try and learn more, now that I have the opportunity.”

“Well, I think that about covers it, though. So there you are, have a slice of my home life story.”

“Much obliged,” Dren nods. “I cannot even imagine – a world of only sentries and animals? And yet, you still fight each other?”

“Buddy, you have no idea,” you grouch.

“You do seem to have built quite the life for yourself back there. Do you miss it?” he asks.

You haven’t been gone for more than a day, though somehow, knowing that you can’t simply just go back makes the separation from what you know a little more intimidating. Your plan of waking up in a hospital bed has, after all, been thoroughly foiled by waking up in a fur-covered hole in the ground, so you surmise this might just be what you’re dealing with now.

Do you miss it? Or do you miss certainty in knowing what will come next?

“I think I’m experiencing some separation anxiety,” you snort, half joking, half serious.

Dren nods in understanding.

The morning hours pass by quickly with more pleasant chatting, comparing worlds and discussing habits and hobbies. You get along surprisingly well with Dren, you learn, as the conversation flows naturally and you find small things you have in common. He’s very easy to talk to with a somewhat dry sense of humor, and you soon find yourself somewhat at ease in his company – which is surprising, considering not an hour ago you learned the humanoid spider is also very much okay with murder. It’s a fact you have to remind yourself should probably not be taken too lightly, no matter how pleasant his company seems.

According to Dren, the storm is still raging outside, so for now, you're somewhat content to hunker down in the relative safety of the patterned walls.

[thedisablednaturalist]

My parents found out about the present I bought myself for my birthday. I worked my max hours to afford it. I had it shipped to my bfs house so they wouldn't see it. Apparently I missed a receipt that was hidden in the box. Idk how they got it anyway cause I put the box out with the trash/recycling. My mom was being so cruel about it and how I keep buying myself "lavish" gifts (most stuff I buy for fun is like $10-$50 max). I always plan my purchases and have never missed a credit card payment. Most of my money goes towards doctors visits, medication, car maintenance and gas, accessibility items/ergonomic stuff, cat food and litter, and hygiene. Recently I stopped most of my subscriptions save for a cheap minecraft server. The bulk of my pay goes into savings which have really grown since I got my raise. I also give my parents $400 in rent each month. I'm trying to save up for a recliner to replace my bed but I don't want to use the money I've already put away.

Like ok, maybe I'm not mr.frugal. maybe i sometimes buy more expensive things because they're more convenient (like already cut vegetables/fruit or preprepared meals) but like my hands fucking hurt and sometimes I don't have the spoons to feed myself. Maybe I fall prey to impulse purchases once in a while. Im learning and I'm trying to learn how to budget bc now I have to also pay for insurance until I can get on medicaid.

My mom acts like I don't care. She sees amazon packages come for me and think theyre all toys or expensive skincare or junk when its actually body wipes for when I cant shower/so i dont come back from the field to the office all stinky. Its a trash can I can keep on my bedshelf so I dont throw trash onto the floor instead. Its knee braces because my knees fucking suck. Once in a while Ill see something on sale that ive been wanting for a while and will grab it. And the most expensive skincare I use is $20 for a jar that lasts me 3 months. I have to keep my skin clear or ill pick and have scabs and blood all over my face again. I spend money on drag because it MAKES me money. Last time I got paid $100 from the venue and $50 in tips. One time I got paid $300 from the venue (i dont remember how much in tips).

Im trying my best. Im working with 3 government agencies rn to get a job and get health coverage. Im working my ass off at my job when i probably shouldnt be working (my mom laughed when I mentioned this). I'm constantly doing things to earn me money or to make life a bit less painful. Even streaming is a desperate attempt to make a career/side gig out of something I enjoy and doesn't make me flare up. I only watch shows when im with my bf or when im doing chores or working. I rarely play video games. When I flare I lay in bed and scroll Tumblr or play a mindless dress up game where I only have to move my thumb. I cry almost everyday. I cry on the way to work. I cry holding my cat in so much pain i cant move.

The only big frivilous purchases I've made is the present and a new graphics card (I haven't replaced my old one in a decade). The present cost $230 and the graphics card cost $800. Both of these I saved for. I might buy a nice skirt once in a while but thats pretty much it. I also spread out big purchases over time when I can.

Am I spoiled? Maybe. Maybe my parents are right and I'm a lazy spoiled kid who just makes excuses. But my pain is real, constant, and severe.

I have friends who's birthday presents consist of trips to fucking italy or the bahamas. Who complain when their parents drag them on yet another international vacation. Some are amazing people who are grateful and work their asses off. And some of them are a bit entitled. My mom said most 26 year olds are living on their own with jobs and I fucking laughed. The only 26 year olds with their own apartments especially in my area either have 5 roommates in a 2 bedroom shithole, got lucky and have a high paying tech job, their parents pulled strings to get them hired, or their parents are paying partly or fully for their apartment.

And when i tried to find an apartment? She discouraged me and told me id never be able to afford one (correct) but now im suddenly able to when it suits her argument? Ive been heavily job hunting for over a year and got ONE interview who ghosted me after two interviews. I make $2k MAX. Rent in my area is $1700-2500 for a freaking studio. The $1700 one doesn't let you see the apartment and gets snapped up immediately. And these are all apartments within a 2 hour radius. All the "affordable housing" is for people 55 and older.

Like I literally have no options. I can't move until I get a job in that area. I can't leave the country cause Im disabled and also thats fucking expensive. My bf makes less than me and even combined we couldn't afford a place.

Literally, I've never been suicidal before. Ive never struggled with that due to my fear of death. But all of this? Ive recently had suicidal thoughts and its fucking scary. Thoughts that killing myself would make it easier for everyone else. That it would be easier to just end it, that life will always be a living hell and i should just give up. And thats fucking scary! I shouldn't have those thoughts! But that's how bad it is.

I try to do what my therapist told me. I try to set boundaries. But setting a boundary means not eating dinner bc I leave when my parents yell at me. I try to think positively and ignore the pain. I probably walk an average of 1-2 miles a day. I try and try and try and it hurts so much. They can't be proud of me? For even big victories? Guilting me about graduation cause I took too long. Keeping a job for more than a year (its not a REAL job cause its hourly and doesnt have benefits).

Like what's the point? I've been fighting and fighting and most of the world wants to see me dead and gone anyway. I'm trying to work in a field that doesn't even consider people like me. If I cant work Ill just bring my boyfriend and my family down. Every step forward I manage to take I get dragged back 10.

Im so tired and ashamed and stressed and my fucking body hurts worse now because of the stress and i just dont want to wake up tomorrow.

[thinkin-bout-milgram]

Hello! I'd love to get into Milgram but I'm not sure how to go about it. I understand that it's over now, but could you suggest a good way to experience the story?

Hello!! Sorry that this took a sec for me to get back to, I wanted to make sure that I was thorough!

For starters, it's very important that I emphasize that Milgram is not over!! The voting is still taking place and we are only about halfway through the interactive thing, so don't worry, you haven't missed it!

Getting into Milgram can be a bit daunting if you're still figuring it out, so I'm happy to help! I'll be explaining roughly how I went about it, because I think it went pretty well.

I also made this playlist:

If you want, instead of using this guide, you can just go through the playlist instead of reading it, but I'd recommend following along! If you want to have the playlist open though, it'll probably help the guide make more sense as I go through it.

I'll break this guide up into parts because it's gonna be pretty long.

PART 1: WHAT IS MILGRAM?

Milgram is an interactive video project in which 10 prisoners, who are all connected to a murder, produce music videos through a machine that give details about themselves, their lives and their crimes.

At the end of each round (which is called a trial), we as a fanbase vote whether we think they're guilty/unforgivable or innocent/forgivable (exact translations vary). There are 3 rounds, so each prisoner gets a total of 3 verdicts. The last one is the only one that sticks, but earlier verdicts influence the prisoners and what songs and information we get along the way.

That's the basic gist. Jackalope (the host of Milgram) explains it in his "This is the MILGRAM" video, which I highly recommend watching to get a better sense. You should also watch the character trailer, which gives you some quick insight into who each of the prisoners are before you watch their videos.

Es's one and only MV, UNDERCOVER, also goes here. Es is the warden, not a prisoner (unless you're theorizing), but they still get an MV (and a cover and audio drama -- more on that shortly) before the first trial. Watch it; it's a great song, gives you some quick insight into each of the prisoners, and has plenty of fuel to theorize about! Though, if you're going to get theorizing, I recommend coming back to tackle UNDERCOVER after you finish your first watch through of Trial 1. It's hard to follow when you don't know the other characters very well yet.

PART 2: TRIAL ONE

If you want a glimpse of each of the Trial 1 songs, you can look at the Song of the Prisoners - First Trial Trailer video. Then, you'll proceed to the first song of Trial One: Weakness by Haruka.

The MV is the main part of any trial. You watch the MV, you listen to the song, you read the lyrics. I strongly recommend watching it a few times to gather your thoughts. Then, you can either work on developing your own theory, or you can get straight to reading others'. Obviously I'm biased, but I like to think my theories are pretty good, so if you want to check them out, they're all on our page's Master List, linked here.

Each prisoner's CD comes with two other things as well: a cover and an audio drama. You can find both of them on music streaming services under the character's name (I just use spotify).

The cover is just their VA doing a cover of one of DECO*27's many other songs (DECO*27 is a very popular vocaloid producer). These covers have been called "just for fun," but you can definitely speculate as to why specific ones were chosen, and even some of the VAs have speculated that they aren't as detached from the actual content as DECO claims.

The audio dramas are interrogations between Es and the prisoner, set right before Es extracts the MV from their mind. They give great insight, and especially in the second trial, they can contain critical information. I usually use @onigiriico's translations because they're extremely fast and accurate, but @milgrammer also has great and detailed records, and I used theirs for the early first trial ones. I typically read these after I watch the MV, but you could also definitely listen to them first to better place yourself in Es's shoes.

You can vote every day when a character is up for trial. I already did a pretty extensive guide on voting, so I'll just link that here for you to read if you're interested.

But yeah, basically just go through that same process for all of those, then watch Jackalope's report on the end of the first trial! Then, go to trial 2.

PART THREE: TRIAL TWO

This one's ongoing, so this is the current one!

At the beginning of the second trial, I'd really REALLY recommend watching Jackalope's second trial commencement notice video. It's super important moving forward.

We did get some info before that video came out, though. Here's my theory/thought post going over it if you want more details.

But yeah, just go through the MVs/theories/audio dramas/covers as you did in trial one! Currently we just did Shidou and Mahiru, so their voting periods are currently available.

Hope this helped! If anything is still unclear, please DM/comment/send another ask so I can clarify!