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newcaptainofsquad9 · 3 years

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I Can’t Handle You Being Back~Chou Tzuyu x black! fem! reader {3}

Parts: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7

Pairing: Tzuyu x reader

Summary: A few weeks have passed and you’re already set to make your debut with Twice during their comeback for Cry For Me and I Can’t Stop Me. Things with Tzuyu haven’t gotten better, and it’s about to get worse when the company forces you both to do a live together with the other foreign members. Can you and Tzuyu get through it?

Genre: Angst, Idol-Verse, Romance, Slow Burn, Hurt and Comfort, Best Friends to Lovers

Warnings: None, just a lot of tension and awkwardness between y/n and Tzuyu. ya know your usual angst

Word Count: 2, 750

Writer’s Note: Ok, so this chapter gets a bit juicy and there’s going to be a bit of jealously, along with a hint of romance, but that’s all I’m gonna say. Hope ya’ll enjoy it and please comment! I want to hear your thoughts and feedback. This took me like a month to write it, I’m not sure how I feel about it so :/ yeah.

Onces, Netizens and the overall Kpop community in general were lit a blaze with the reveal of Twice’s new member: me. Of course now being in a whirlwind of what is Twice’s schedule, I didn’t have time or the energy to read comments, dms or messages that I’ve gotten from them (thank God). Jihyo was also a factor in keeping me on my toes during long dance practice days, even though she wasn’t as hard on me as she was with the others. They weren’t too hard on me either, usually laughing at my mistakes and helping me if I missed my timing or not. The pressure was on: not only from the Korea public and Kpop community as a whole but because of Tzuyu as well. Her eyes would always be on me, then they roll as she waited for me to fix whatever I did. Even during my photoshoots for the album or promotional media, she’s got her eye on me. We haven’t even talked much since she blew up at me weeks prior. I’m not sure how to fix this really.

I decided now to ignore her, which is easier said than done, due to how close we are during performances. (She literally rests her head against my shoulder during Cry For Me, damn you JYPE!) Right now we’re back stage at Music Bank, awaiting for our rehearsals for our I Can’t Stop Me stage and she’s seated directly to my right, all that’s keeping her from me is my phone, along with Jeongyeon seated between us.

“Y/N, check out this meme,” Jeongyeon said as she practically shoved her phone in my face.

I chuckled lowly; Jeongyeon nudged me.

“That’s the only reaction I get?” she whined. “You always laugh at Chaeyoung’s.”

“Well that’s because she doesn’t use ancient memes,” I said. “The cereal guy is like five years old!”

“So, are you calling me old Y/N!” Jeongyeon said. “That’s disrespectful to your Unnie.”

She nudged my shoulder a few times with a sly grin and furrowed brows.

“No,” I groaned. “Your taste in memes are old.”

“Who’s old?” Nayeon said as she squished herself between me and Jeongyeon. “You better not be talking about me Jeong.”

“You said it not me,” Jeongyeon said with a snicker.

Nayeon didn’t waste any time in smacking her arm, making her laughter rise while I get up to avoid their playful conflict.

“How about you both make out already,” I teased.

The words make both idols separate with the quickness; their faces red as they sit up straighter.

“W-Whatever Y/N,” Nayeon said. “I should be telling you and Tzuyu doing that since all you both can do is eye each other.”

Now I’m the one recoiling, Jeongyeon did the same as Tzuyu’s attention is on Nayeon with a stare. Jeongyeon nudged Nayeon and pushed her back onto her feet.

“Everything was fine until you came along,” Jeongyeon whined. “Also, your make-up’s smudged a bit.”

Nayeon’s hands fled to her face, shock over took it in a matter of seconds.

“Look at your face!” Jeongyeon said as she erupted into another round of heated giggles. I smiled to entertain her, but stop immediately as Nayeon throws us a deadpanned look this time.

“You’re still a grandma,” Nayeon said as she walked away from the couch and towards Mina, Jihyo, and Momo, who held Boo in her arms.

“Ya! If I’m a grandma then what does that make you!” Jeongyeon yelled back. “Great grandma!”

I shook my head and returned back to my phone, my finger itching to open up Instagram yet I’m restrained by soft hands. Tzuyu’s next to me, close but not as close as Jeongyeon was. Her face in taunt, but not in the anger she aimed at Nayeon; this look is of warning.

“Don’t,” she said. “Didn’t Jihyo unnie say not to.”

“I-I just wanted to message someone back,” I said. “You hardly talk to me, why are you doing this now?”

Tzuyu rolled her eyes.

“I just don’t want you in a mood where you can’t focus,” Tzuyu said. “You mess up so easily.”

“Wow, thanks for reminding me,” I said. “I just have to check something with someone.”

Tzuyu pulled her hand away from my wrist, yet she doesn’t return to the other end of the couch.

“Who?” she said.

I side eye her for a moment while I open Instagram; my direct messages are 100 +, forcing my pulse to pound in my ears. The second I tap the arrow that brings up the messages, the swarm hits me:

How come out of all the Sixteen contestants, they bring back the worst one.

You won’t be a real Twice member. This has got to be a PR stunt from all the “cultural appropriation” allegations.

K-Pop isn’t for you, go back to America.

Who told you K-Pop was for you, you black bitch.

The negative messages began to build, and build, out-weighting the small clump of positives ones that came through. My hand tightened around my phone as anger and fear boiled up inside me: angry at myself for taking on this opportunity and fearful because of the hate. I expected this so, why am I feeling this way?

“Y/N?” Tzuyu said as she nudged her shoulder against my own. “Momo Unnie!”

Momo’s head whipped around to the couch, Boo sniffing every where from his position in her arms. Tzuyu’s voice also got the attention of Jihyo, Nayeon, and Jeongyeon as well. They flocked over to us immediately.

“Y/N, are you all right?” Jihyo asked as she knelt down in front of me.

I broke from the trance that the hate comments pinned me in and glanced up at the concerned faces of my bandmates, including Tzuyu this time. Her eyes cut to Momo, as Boo continued to wiggle in her arms.

“Unnie! Could she hold Boo, please?” Tzuyu whined.

Momo blinked at Tzuyu but did so anyway and placed the wiggly dog in my arms.

“Whoa, there,” I said as Boo sniffed down my brown blazer. “Hey there, Boo right? God you’re such a good boy aren’t you? Yeah?”

Boo sunk down in my lap licking my fingers as I pet him with my other hand. Nayeon was right, Boo really is a great stress reliever. Any dog is, gosh it’s been so long since I’ve petted or actually owned a dog.

“Are you ok now, Y/N?” Momo asked. “Boo really likes you, he could barely stop moving when Sana first held him.”

“Are you nervous about the performance?” Mina said as she walked to stand behind the couch with Sana, Chaeyoung, and Dahyun behind her.

“Yeah, being up there with you guys is extremely nerve wracking,” I said. “And I read a few of the comments online.”

“Y/N,” Jihyo groaned. “You shouldn’t have done that.”

“I know, know but the public’s perception means a lot, right?” I said. “The Knets are already giving me a headache.”

Mina frowned and placed her hands on my shoulders, then gently squeezed.

“You’ve been practicing so hard with us,” Sana said. “You’ll do amazing!”

I nodded, still taken a back by the comments but Boo’s yipping and the encouraging words from my band-mates eased my worries (even if it’s just for a little bit).

“All right girls!” a manager said as he stormed into the room along with my own manager, Miyoung who signals me towards her. “You’re going on in five!”

I rise, Boo whined as I did and Nayeon held her arms out to take him.

“Aww, Boo, Y/N will be back soon. OK?” she cooed.

I handed him to her before stepping over to a free corner of the room with Miyoung.

She gave me a tiny grin as she rubbed my arm, giving me a once over.

“You all right? It seemed like the girls were consoling you over there,” she said.

“I’m getting there,” I admitted. “I’ve been practicing choreography for weeks and I just saw--”

I paused at Miyoung’s face; it contorted in concern then exasperation.

“You read the comments, didn’t you?” she asked.

I glanced down and nodded.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t trying to let it get in the way of the comeback.”

“Hey, no Y/N,” Miyoung said. “You don’t deserve any of that. JYPE’s even taking the legal action against a lot of the comments, surprisingly.”

I blinked at her words.

“He’s actually keeping his word,” I said.

Miyoung nodded.

“And you’ve got a V Live to do after the performance once you return to the dorms,” she explained. “A welcoming type thing with the other foreign members.”

I hesitated at the word foreign, that means being close to Tzuyu. It also means being close to Tzuyu on camera.

“Is that all right?” Miyoung asked.

“Y-Yeah, I just don’t know how this would go.”

Miyoung brought me a bit closer as she wrapped her arm around my shoulder.

“Well you’ve got Twice in your corner,” she said. “And if anything or any one of them bother you, even another manager, come to me. Brittany insisted I keep an eye on you.”

I deadpan while my mind wondered back to how Brittany was ready to fight JYP in his own office if things grew awry.

“Y/N, c’mon!”

I turned toward the door to see everyone geared up and ready to perform, eyes steady waiting for me; Tzuyu even with a tiny grin on her face.

“Go on,” Miyoung said. “Have fun, don’t think too much of it.”

***

I messed up the shoulder move; I know I did and the playback remained in my mind throughout the drive back to the dorm and as we all settle into our rooms.

“Y/N it’s OK,” Jeongyeon groaned as she slumped against her bed. “You were off by a nanosecond. The only person who noticed was you.”

“Exactly! The Netizens will tear me apart even more when they notice and--”

“And that’s not important right now,” Mina said as she entered Jeongyeon, Momo and I’s room with Sana on her arm.

“V Live time!” Sana sung.

“Good,” Jeongyeon said. “Keep Ms. Worry away for a while. Mina let me play your switch while you guys are live.”

Mina shrugged.

“Sure, but you’re going to have to get it from Chaeyoung,” she explained. “She’s playing it in my room.”

“Ugh, you and your girlfriend,” Jeongyeon said as she rose from the bed.

I perked up at the term.

“Girlfriend? You guys are dating?”

Mina nodded.

“Of course we can’t be official,” she said.

“I know,” I said. “Things aren’t as liberal here as they are in America. I-I can’t believe those ship videos were right.”

Mina blushed a bit.

“That’s the only fan discourse Chae and I keep up with mostly.”

“You kept up with ships Y/N?” Sana asked.

“N-No! I was just curious that’s all! Anyway, let’s go get this live over with.”

Sana giggled as she led Mina and I to her room where Momo and Tzuyu sat in pajamas, holding stuffed animals tightly.

“Y/N! Don’t worry about the performance, you did amazing!” Momo reassured.

“Let’s hope the Netizens agree with you,” I groaned and plopped down beside Momo and Tzuyu on the floor.

“I thought you were supposed to stop worrying about the Netizens,” Tzuyu said. “It almost got in the way today.”

I turn toward Tzuyu and crossed my arms.

“So you noticed my screw up too?” I said.

Tzuyu rolled her eyes.

“Almost is the key word,” she groaned before she reached up from the bed next to us and grabbed a few stuffed animals. “Now which stuffed animal do you want?”

I blinked at the choices Tzuyu presented: a purple flamingo with oval shaped eyes or a pink alpaca with a square shaped eyes and a rather odd expression.

“I’ll take the flamingo,” I said.

Tzuyu handed it off as Sana gasped.

“He suits you Y/N,” she said. “Two cuties and wow, I didn’t know you hung out with Sooyoung Y/N!”

“Who?” Tzuyu asked.

“Joy!” Sana squealed

“Sana what are you talking about?” I asked as she leapt on the bed and showed the phone to us.

We both peered down at the picture in front of us; I remember this one (sort of) from a few years back when I co-wrote a few tracks for Red Velvet and hung out a bit with Sooyoung, we were at a beach some where in LA. I’m sure her fans didn’t pay it much mind but since I’m an idol now along with her, I’m not sure how anymore.

“Look, lot’s of fans speculate you’re both dating now!” Sana said. “So, is it true?”

I’m the one rolling my eyes this time, Sana tossed a flirty grin my way and wiggled her eyebrows.

“No Sana, why are you being so ridiculous right now.”

“Come on Y/N,” Momo said as she nudged me against the shoulder. “Sooyoung is pretty hot. You sure you didn’t--”

“Unnie, don’t,” Tzuyu warned. “Y/N said she didn’t so we should just leave it at that.”

“Tzuyu’s right, we should start the V--”

Mina was cut off by Miyoung and a few other managers step into the room.

“Sorry we’re late!” Miyoung said. “We brought snacks!”

Momo’s eyes grew large. She nearly snatched the plastic bag from Miyoung, pulling out a large bag of BBQ Lays before passing the bag to me. I reached in and pulled out a green tea flavored Kit Kat (it’s been a minute since I’ve had one).

“Thank you, uh are you sure we can eat this on camera?” I said.

“Yes Y/N,” Sana said through a giggle. “Gone are our Sixteen days, plus this is our chill V-Live time, fans love to see us just kicking back and having fun.”

“Everyone huddle in!” Miyoung instructed. “Make sure you’re close so the viewers can see!”

Momo squeezed herself closer, and to my surprise Tzuyu did the same; she hasn’t been this close since Cry For Me dance practice, her perfume is too strong. It made me a bit light headed, or is it just the feeling of her close again? Probably both.

“Here Y/N,” one male manager said as he handed a phone off to me. “Hold this so you guys can keep up with the comments .”

Miyoung rested her phone up on a stand before looking to us.

“You guys ready?”

Everyone nodded, all but me.

“Y/N?” Mina asked as she slipped a hand on my shoulder.

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” I said and put on my best smile.

“That’s all we can ask for,” Miyoung said. “Now, we’re live!”

The moment she pressed record, everyone around me perked up to flash their own smiles.

“Hi Onces! We just wanted to hang out with you guys and welcome our new member to you officially, Y/N!” they said in unison.

I waved and smiled enough to reveal teeth.

“Hi Onces! I’m glad to be here!”

My eyes couldn’t help but flock down to the phone in my hand, even with the other four members reading it as well. There’s a part of me that told me not to, but I had to stop thinking like that. I’m a member of Twice too, no matter what they think or say.

The oncoming comments read:

Hi Y/N!!!

So pretty!!

Hi from Brazil!!

Why is she here? Why couldn’t Nayeon take her place?

She doesn’t belong in Korea with the beauty of Twice.

Do you guys name your stuffed animals?

My heart hammered and thumped painfully hard in my ears; instead of stare blankly I chew on my Kit Kat in silence.

“Well I haven’t named this one yet,” Sana explained.

“Manager-unnie!” Mina called, waving to Miyoung. “We can report this comment here!”

“I got it,” Tzuyu said as she took the phone from my hands.

I watched her through a mouthful of chocolate as her brows stay focused; she turned back to the camera with determination as she handed the phone over to Mina.

“Y/N belongs here,” Tzuyu declared to the camera. “And if you don’t want to watch her with us you can leave.”

I almost choked at her words; I heard that correctly, right? I was dreaming, right? Tzuyu must have picked up on my stress and looped her arm around my own; she didn’t pay it much attention to it as she fell into more easy going questions with Momo, Mina and Sana. I did as well, soon enough.

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miraculouslycool · 4 years

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in the dead of night, your eyes so green

Summary: What did he have to do to let her know exactly how much she deserved? She needed someone who would spend hours making himself good for her, someone who would open her doors, who would listen to her talk for as long as she wanted, who would see her for the wonderful person she was, even if....even if it wasn't him.

"Go out with me."

A loud silence followed his words.

Read in Ao3:

Adrien Agreste loved being Chat Noir. The thrill he would feel while jumping over rooftops and running along them, that couldn't compare to anything in the world.

Well, almost anything in the world. The thrill of getting to see Ladybug was still far greater.

He was the personification of everything unpredictable and wild, and yet, he loved the little routine he had with Ladybug. Not that he would ever wish akumatisation on anybody, but seeing her make a plan worthy of a million brain cells, fighting alongside her, meeting up for patrol, getting to see the city in a way no one would - he lived for that lucidity, as abnormal and extraordinary as it was.

"Why hello there, m'lady!" He said, half in surprise. "You're early today." He commented, landing on the rooftop next to her.

"Huh?" She started, looking at him. "Oh, hey Chat." She blinked, like she had just seen him there.

"Whatcha thinking about, Bugaboo?" He winked.

"Oh, oh nothing, nothing much." She muttered, shaking her head, and (he couldn't believe it) blushing.

He squinted. "Is everything okay?" He asked. "You really look lost in thought."

That's when it clicked. There were two akumas today, one was an old lady who was annoyed that there was so much traffic in the city, she became a supervillain with vacuuming powers that wiped out nearly every vehicle in the city, and of course, their daily dose of M. Pigeon.

He had barely gotten over his sneezing from all the pigeon feathers when Ladybug had hurried away, muttering a quick apology and saying something about being late.

He hadn't thought much of it then, but now maybe whatever transpired in her civilian life didn't go over so well.

"Did it go well? The thing you were late for?" He asked.

She gaped a little before composing herself. "Uh, um, yeah!" She stammered, before shaking her head. "Let's...let's pet gatrolling- I mean - patrolling, sorry." She said, readying her yo-yo. "You take the left bank, I'll take the right."

She was gone before he had a chance to open his mouth.

Chat sighed. He certainly didn't prefer getting tidbits or half-worded accounts of Ladybug's life, nor did he like watching his words every time he spoke to her. He understood why, of course, and he'd never question her about it

He knew Ladybug was his age, and so he knew she had a life of her own, university classes of her own, at least he thinks she does, and many, many other things she couldn't tell him.

Raising his staff, he took off to do his duty as one half of Paris's dynamic duo, quietly dreaming of the day he would get to simply talk to Ladybug for hours and hours without checking himself.

Talking. That was enough. They didn't even need to be together. He knew that was never going to happen since years ago, and he accepted it.

Which meant that he needed to stop going down that path, he thought to himself furiously. He was going to slow down, and once they met up, he was going to ask her again.

She was a completely different person when they met on top of the Eiffel Tower again. Then, she was distracted and flustered, now she was all smiles.

"All clear?" She asked - no, she practically chirped.

"Hm, yeah. Nothing happened." He said, noting her too wide smile and bright eyes. "What about you, though?

"Yep, everything is fine on my side." She said quickly, putting on that perky air he had never seen in her before. "Okay then, see you tomorrow, Chat-"

"Wait!" He caught her hand. "Ladybug, are you okay?"

"Yeah." She said slowly. "Why wouldn't I be?"

"Look, I don't know what's going on, and you don't need to tell me what's going on, but - you know that I can tell when you're upset, don't you?" He asked, squeezing her wrist.

"I...even if I could tell you," her cheeks turned a bright crimson red. "I can't. It's too embarrassing. And pathetic."

"I can do embarrassing." Chat said proudly, pointing to himself. "And it can't be pathetic."

"It is." She squeezed her eyes shut. "It really is."

"You can tell me." He perked up. "I mean - if you want to, that is!! I don't want to like, guilt trip you or force you into telling me-"

She stopped him by squeezing his shoulder. "I do want to tell you."

"Really?" He breathed. She wasn't just saying that?

"So, um, I went out on a date today and it went so-" Ladybug's eyes widened and she slapped her hand over her mouth, just as a large weight dropped in Chat's stomach.

"I'm sorry!!" Ladybug fell all over herself trying to apologize. "I'm so sorry, mon chaton, I didn't mean to- oh my god, I'll shut up now." She covered her face in her hands. "I'm so so stupid!"

"Hey, hey, hey!" Chat held her shoulders. "What are you apologizing for?"

Actually he knew exactly what she was apologizing for. But it wasn't like she needed to.

Swallowing down that twinge of hurt, he let her speak. "I wasn't trying to rub it in your face or anything! I shouldn't have-"

"Wait, is that what this is about? M'lady, it's fine. If you want to talk about a bad date, if that's what it is-" he said, selfishly hoping it was. "-of course, I'm here for you. I've had my share of bad dates too."

She paused in her fretting over his words. Well, he wasn't lying about the dates part. Most of them were PR stunts set up by his father, sometimes the girl in question was genuinely nice and friendly but they just didn't click.

And then there were those disastrous ones, which were few far and in between.

"You - you have?" She blinked in wonder, like she couldn't believe it.

"Is that so surprising?" He asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"No!" Ladybug shook her head, cursing herself. Chat Noir was the one guy in her life she didn't become a flustered mess around, but it seemed like she couldn't even do that right today.

Obviously, he had a life beyond defeating supervillains, beyond the mask and beyond her - woah, where did that come from - it shouldn't be such a huge surprise that he went on dates with girls too.

"No, it's just, I can't imagine - I can't imagine you ever having a date that went badly, I mean, you're- you know, all charming and dashing-" she regretted saying that the minute his smirk became cockier.

"I see, never knew you thought of me that way, Bugaboo. One learns new things everyday." He said smugly.

"Ha ha." She punched his arm. "You know what I mean. I'm just saying I find it really hard to believe you having a hard time with girls."

'If only you ever knew there was only one girl I want to have all my time with.' He thought dreamily to himself before snapping himself out of it.

His lady needed him, he needed to shelve the stupid fantasies for now.

He pulled her down as he sat cross legged on the roof of the Eiffel Tower.

"Come on, tell Chat Noir all about the dude he needs to punch." He said cheekily.

"No need to punch anyone." She sighed, hugging her knees. "The fault is mine this time."

"I seriously doubt that." He said so firmly it made her look up.

"You don't even know what happened!" She exclaimed.

He frowned, but nodded and let her continue.

"Okay, so, uh, the guy! Right, the guy." For heaven's sake, why was she so shy?? This was Chat Noir! She talked to him about everything and anything she could talk about!

"He is one of my classmates." She said. "He and I met while working on a project together and well, we had similar tastes, so uh, two weeks later, when the project is done and assigned and graded, he asks me out, and why not? I said yes." She snuck a peek at his face, making sure that he wasn't bored or something, to her surprise, she caught a momentary flash of hardness in his expression, but it left as soon as it came.

"But of course," she growled, continuing her story, "The butterfly bastard just HAD to bring out two akumas on today of all days. After the first one, I was so late I had to run to the restaurant and by the time the second one came out, I had to leave in the middle of lunch!! He didn't say anything, but I could tell he was pissed." She said sadly. "And I don't blame him, if I were in his shoes, I'd hate me too."

"Come on, don't say that. It's not your fault you stood him up." Chat rubbed her back comfortingly.

"Yeah, it's not like he knows that now, does he? And this isn't even the first time this has happened. You wouldn't believe the number of classes I had to catch up on because of akumas, let alone dates!"

Sadly, Chat could relate. He had to work overnight for a photoshoot he had missed because of akumas. And then he had to go home and work on his school work. He had gotten so sick the next day even Plagg decided to ban him from stepping out of the house.

"Don't worry. I feel the same way too." He said. "I love being Chat Noir and all, but..."

"Having a double life and not being to explain why?" She finished. "I know."

"Hey, if it makes you feel better, I once had to stand someone up because of an akuma and that girl was so pissed she dumped her soda on me. In public."

He remembered making the headlines in every tabloid in Paris. He had gotten a mouthful from his father. Alya and Marinette, once they heard about it, were very sympathetic, and once Nino stopped laughing at it, he did too.

"What?!" Ladybug cried. "That's insane!! No one should - who does that?!"

"People who've been left waiting for 2 and a half hours?" Chat shrugged, shaking it off like it was nothing. "Like you said, I don't really blame her."

"Still! I mean! I would never do that! I wouldn't humiliate someone like that in public!" She was enraged. Her poor kitty. He had probably gone home feeling awful as she did, when he didn't deserve to.

"Really?" He said bitterly. "You wouldn't wanna sock the lights out of some idiot who stood you up for a reason that wasn't an akuma?"

Ladybug had nothing to say.

"Bugaboo?" He prompted.

"Well...." she hesitated. "I've been trying to be more understanding about people standing me up or just arriving late. I mean, it would be hypocritical not to."

Chat blinked at her disbelievingly.

"Chaton? What's wrong?" She asked.

"Please tell me I'm not hearing that you don't take yourself getting stood up as seriously as you should."

"Well, it's not always so bad, sometimes they're late, sometimes he has to leave too soon, sometimes they just forget-" she was interrupted by him making an offended noise.

And he was offended! Deeply! Who on earth would forget a date with Ladybug?? He wouldn't have been able to sleep from the excitement and some idiot was LATE?

'Okay, Agreste, simmer down. It's not you she's on a date with.'

He was so focused on calming himself down, he didn't notice Ladybug staring at him, a soft smile on her face. She really hadn't expected him to get so angry on her behalf. Her chest tingled pleasantly, like she had just taken a sip of warm, delicious mead.

"It just...It just isn't fair. You shouldn't be accepting someone so inconsiderate enough to be late for a person who's waiting for them. You shouldn't, you just shouldn't."

Maybe it was his in-bred manners or it was his mind drifting to a world where he would spend every waking minute counting down to the day he would be meeting Ladybug at some quaint, little restaurant - okay, this had to STOP.

He wasn't that dumb kid with an unrestrained crush anymore, he had to restrain it, for her sake.

"I agree..." Ladybug said, fiddling with one of her slightly longer pigtails. "But at the same time...I don't."

He opened his mouth to argue, but she gently cut him off. "How about we trade stories? Yours really can't have been worse than the soda dumper."

"Uh....I once went out with someone who just asked me out as a part of a dare - a girl who was a lesbian and was just checking to make sure she wasn't interested in guys, one moved way too fast-" he noticed her eyes glinting dangerously at that. "-some were so shy I never wanted to make the first move, I got set up with a few people but..." he rubbed the back of his neck. "...we just never clicked."

"Oh dear." Ladybug clicked her tongue.

"Aaaand, then there was this girl who got so offended when I wanted to get a turn to talk. I mean, she asked questions about me and answered it with a story about herself." He mumbled.

"I know right?!" Ladybug exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air. "No! I don't want to be talked AT, I want to talk with you!"

Chat let out a low whistle. "You totally get it."

"And they expect me to come along with them back to my place when..." he winced. "I'm just not ready. Not that there's anything wrong with them wanting to!"

"You don't have to do anything you don't want to, you know that right?" Ladybug said fiercely. "No means no. Did they ever try to-?"

"No, no, god no. But they looked so disappointed or miffed I just feel so bad." He traced low circles around his thigh absentmindedly.

Ladybug was surprised at that. She hadn't expected Chat Noir of all people to be someone who would take it slow and steady.

She didn't want to mention the creeps who acted betrayed because she didn't want to go home with them that night - lest she make him angry.

As much as it was sweet to see Chat Noir being protective of her, she very much enjoyed meeting the shy, sweet guy who was always scared if he offended people at every step.

That wasn't a side she expected to see, but oddly it didn't feel so out of place for him either.

' Oh, chaton. You are too good for this world. Loud, brash, reckless, but good.' She thought bittersweetly.

"What about you?" He interrupted her thoughts. "Any other nightmares you'd like to share?"

She gagged before continuing.

"Okay, this isn't so bad, but one guy took me out to a football game, and...I did not enjoy it."

'Ladybug doesn't enjoy sports. ' He mentally filed away. 'Okay maybe not all sports,' he corrected himself cautiously.

"Did you tell him that?"

"Not really, he was so into it, and I felt like it would be horrible of me to make him feel bad too."

'She's so nice.' He thought. 'If I could find a word better than 'nice', she is that.' he thought lamely.

"You are too good for anyone in this world." He said, yawning as he did.

"Oh come on. Most of my experiences weren't so bad. He wouldn't get a second glance if he so much as got any ideas, let alone a second date." She grumbled.

"Either way, this is mostly just my friends setting me up with someone. With how busy I am," she gestured to all of Paris. "I really don't think I'm dating material."

"M'lady, please don't sell yourself short." He lay back on the cold iron, stretching his limbs, leaving his legs dangling off the roof.

Ladybug snuck a peek at him. Chat was always so lively and animated, always talking a mile a minute, it was so unlike him to be this serious. He sounded practically stern while telling her not to sell herself short.

His eyes were loosely closed, and since her knee was touching his thigh, the heat from his body was emanating through hers. She remembered from her vague research on the internet that cats were warm blooded animals, and were natural conductors of heat.

Now of course she knew Chat Noir was a guy and not an actual cat, yet something was clawing away at her to cocoon herself into a ball next to him and find that out for herself.

Ugh, the lack of sleep was getting to her head.

She had very well moved on from her first (and so far ONLY!) crush Adrien and hearing about his own active dating life only brought a twinge of discomfort to her now.

She would have been on three-fourths of the dates she had been if it wasn't for Alya trying her best to get her to move on. And Marinette did appreciate it! But it really wasn't helping her out much. - she was practically admitting defeat in the art of courting.

And of course her tired mind was fixating itself on the one other guy she couldn't be with. A few years ago, it was rare to catch a moment when Chat Noir was not showering her with genuine praise or confessing his love.

Now only one of those two remained, and that was Marinette's own doing. She was the one who rejected him time and time again for another love as pointless as he seemed to be. How stupid would it be of her to hope he still felt the same

It was stupid. And Marinette Dupain Cheng wasn't stupid.

"I'm giving up on dating entirely." She ended up saying.

"Huh?" He gasped.

"Yeah, you heard me. I'm sick of going with people I don't fit in with, or being late for them or wondering if I'm being stood up or not."

She could live. It would just be her, her books, her classes. No drama would come her way.

"WOAH, don't you think you're being a little too hasty?" Chat sprung up from his doze.

"I'm surprised you aren't joining me! You're seriously considering trying after all those attempts?"

"Uhhhh..." He didn't know how to answer that. He technically couldn't stop - keeping up the appearance of a bachelor with an active dating life was part of his job. And he wasn't even 20 yet.

"Forget it." She said, not waiting for him to answer. "I think I'm cursed, kitty. What's the point of putting myself through something that is obviously not going to work?"

What did he have to do to let her know exactly how much she deserved? She needed someone who would spend hours making himself good for her, someone who would open her doors, who would listen to her talk for as long as she wanted, who would see her for the wonderful person she was, even if....even if it wasn't him.

"Go out with me."

A loud silence followed his words.

"What?" Ladybug murmured, hardly being able to believe his words.

He hadn't meant to say that!!

Why, why, why didn't his head work faster than his big, fat mouth?

"Go...out with me?"

Apparently his brain still wasn't working, because he was still saying those stupid words!

"You're serious?"

It was too late to back out now, so what the hell, he may as well complete making a fool out of himself.

"I am. Let me take you out on one date. Just one, no strings attached. And if you still think you're cursed by the end of it, you can give up like you wanted to. I just don't want you to give up on a real chance of getting to enjoy atleast one date."

Ladybug blinked. Was she hearing him right?

He was asking her out? After so long?

"How - how would that work?" She stammered. "Wouldn't it draw a lot of attention if Ladybug and Chat Noir were seen out together on a date?"

Somewhere in his heart where that ember of hope when it came to Ladybug had died out, a spark fizzled.

She wasn't saying no. Yet.

"We could..." he said, thinking. 'We could wear disguises. We could wear sunglasses or masks if it doesn't end up being weird, and we could text each other how we're going to look! And hey, if an akuma shows up I won't hold it against you." He joked weakly.

She didn't answer for a full minute and Adrien could feel his heart flatlining.

"It's okay if you don't want to - I understand! It was just a suggestion and-" he mumbled the next part. "-I just thought it would be cool."

"When do you want to do this?"

She still wasn't saying no?

Was he dreaming?

"I'm not free this weekend." He said, trying to remember his schedule. Nathalie said his father would be out for the next full week at Milan. That would be a perfect chance to sneak out.

"So maybe next Saturday?"

Then slowly, she got up, reeled her yoyo out and smiled at him. "Text me the details?"

All he could do was dumbly nod at her swinging away.

If Paris heard a loud 'WAHOO!' coming from the Champ de Mars, they didn't comment.

A week later, Marinette found herself climbing up the stairs to her loft.

"Marinette dear, how did lunch with your friends go?" Her mother called from the living room.

"It went well, mom!" Marinette called back, once she got over her momentary shock.

"Okay, sweetie! Let us know if you need anything!"

"Marinette?" Tikki floated up to her chosen once they were in her room. "Are you sure you're okay?"

"What do you mean - oh you mean with Adrien?" Marinette realised.

She had managed to catch up with Alya, Nino and Adrien that afternoon.

Being with her friends after two years of not getting to see them in the hallways of the same school was incredible. Of course they got together every now and then but due to their busy schedules, times like today when they would truly get to hang out were rare.

Especially for poor Adrien. The sparkle in his green eyes was brighter today in their presence.

"Yeah, Tikki, believe me, I'm okay. I know Adrien has a life of his own and...I'm used to it." She shrugged lightly.

"You weren't upset when he..." Tikki winced, not wishing to complete the sentence.

Marinette sighed. She had happened to overhear Adrien and Nino talking about a date he had with someone from work while waiting for his ride.

Alya had given her a sympathetic pep talk all the way home, even if Marinette insisted that she truly was okay with it.

Adrien had a date with someone - whether it was because of his father or it was someone he actually liked - it really wasn't any of her business.

If Adrien asked her out now, she would have a hard time saying no - but...

"I'm happy for you, Marinette." Tikki said approvingly. "I'm glad you're moving on to Chat Noir."

Marinette nearly tripped on thin air.

"I'm not - what?"

"Isn't your date this Saturday?"

"Uh, um, yeah? But it's not really a date-date, we're just you know hanging out!"

"Well he did say 'no strings attached'." Tikki said, and Marinette missed the exasperation in her voice.

"He hasn't even texted me since, and...well, would it be awkward if I brought it up?"

"Why would it?" Tikki shrugged. "It is just a casual one, isn't it?"

The last week was pretty tame on akumas. They only had solo patrols scheduled and there was one akuma last Wednesday which she was particularly grumpy about. Hawkmoth chose to attack during a test she was taking and she had to rush back and beg her professor to let her retake it. She had to stay back in her university for another hour and by the time she went home tired and hungry, she had to have her lunch at 5 PM.

She had barely gotten to even wave at Chat Noir let alone discuss the date that they were supposed to have in four days.

They hadn't texted each other much since that eventful day a week ago.

Marinette flopped on her bed.

"I wish I had enough time to go out for a joint patrol with him. Then maybe I could..." She finished off with a sigh.

"Maybe you could?" Tikki prompted.

"Maybe I could finally ask him about it?" She shrugged, sitting up. "I mean, of course I know he's busy, when we were in school it used to take him less than a minute to annoy me with his silly puns." she rolled her eyes affectionately

Now if he sent her a text, it usually took her three days to respond. That was the case with him too.

Why did they have to grow up?

"Hey Tikki?" She said out loud.

"Yes, Marinette?"

"Is it just me or am I really looking forward to this?" She said in a muffled voice. "Much, much more than I thought I would be?"

Tikki laughed gently, "You're allowed to feel that way, yes."

"It would be nice to go out with someone I already know, instead of a complete stranger." Marinette picked at a thread in her jacket.

"Right."

"I mean, I know Chat Noir. He's a great guy. He's loyal and reliable and the best fighter I know. He always has my back."

"Yes, on the battlefield." Tikki said nonchalantly.

"Huh? What's that supposed to mean?"

"I mean that you are thinking of Chat Noir, your partner, not Chat Noir, your date?"

Marinette squinted at that. "How is that supposed to make me think differently?"

"Well, when he is sitting across you at a dinner table - would you be thinking of how great he is at battle?" Tikki said wryly.

That made Marinette sit up. "What?"

Tikki immediately realised she said the wrong thing. "Marinette-"

"Oh no, oh no, Tikki! What if I have nothing to say?! What if he has nothing to say? What if we just end up sitting there silently and the whole day is ruined?!"

"Marinette, that is not going to happen." Tikki said comfortingly.

"But we've never asked each other personal questions before! We always stick to hypotheticals and that was only when it was necessary!"

"That didn't stop you from talking so freely that day he asked you out." Tikki pointed out. "You two are very comfortable around each other, only if you let yourself be."

Marinette considered what her kwami said.

All she had to do was ask Chat Noir how his life was going. That wasn't too hard, was it?

If they used pronouns and strayed away from getting too detailed, it should be fine.

They always would be. This was Chat Noir, she knew him, even if she didn't even know his real name.

They had grown up together as heroes and as friends for nearly 5 years.

And it's not like she never knew how good-looking he was, either. He used to be a lean, tall teenager with a cocky grin, but now...

She could have sworn the last time she saw him, he had a bit of stubble along his sharp jawline. And sometimes it was very very hard to not look away from his arms when he swung that staff around. And lately his smiles were softer, not smug like they used to be..

Marinette only realised how red her face became when her phone pinged with a message alert.

Slapping her cheeks, she picked her phone up. This had to stop!

Aaaaand of course he of all people had to be the one texting her.

Chaton-Noir: You have a minute

They had downloaded a texting app a long time ago so they could talk to each other without phone numbers getting in the way.

Badylug: Are you responsible for my new nickname? >:(

Chaton-Noir: Why, do you like it? ;)

Badylug : I'm blocking you. smh

Chaton-Noir: Wait, nooooo M'lady pleaaaasse

Badylug: Actually I have a better idea

Furry: What the fuck

Badylug: :satisfied:

Furry: You've really got nothing better

Badylug: >:)

Furry: *gulp* No worries! Furry is good! Furry is great!

Badylug: Good job. :D So, what did you want to tell me?

Furry: Uh, first, are you free?

Badylug: Yes

Furry: How free? Because I wanted to talk about Saturday.

'Badylug' nearly dropped her phone in surprise.

Badylug : Oh, that!

He didn't answer for a while and Marinette's fingers trembled. Had she been too on-the-nose with her reply?

Furry: If you want to back out, or if something came up that day, it's okay!

Furry: I understand.

Wait, he thought she wanted to back out?

"No way!” She thought out loud.

Badylug: Why would you think I'd say yes if I wanted to back out?

Furry: no, no I know

He was typing for a long time and she wondered if he was considering his words carefully.

Furry: I just wanted to make sure if you didn't have any second thoughts.

Badylug : Of course not.

Badylug: I wanted to text you about this for a long time but I was busy and I'm guessing you are too

Badylug : We don't text as much as we used to :(

She genuinely regretted it. If only she had found a way to meet him during circumstances that didn't have to do with akumas.

Hawkmoth shouldn't be the reason for her to see Chat Noir. It just wasn't right.

Furry: Me too, bugaboo. Sometimes in the middle of my job or my classes I want to talk to you too but you're never online and I don't want to disturb you.

Furry : Wait, does Saturday still work for you?

He was being terrified for nothing, she did want to see him - the boy who was Chat Noir without his mask - but this kind of adorable restlessness was something she had encountered often.

He was so scared she was going to cancel he was trying his best to set himself up for disappointment.

And she couldn't blame him either. He didn't tell her much, but she could tell that he didn't look forward to going back home each time they had to leave.

Settling her head on her pillow comfortably, she texted back.

Badylug: Of course it does. I really can't wait to see you, I promise.

Okay maybe she could have been subtler about it, but he sent her a string of happy emojis after it. She couldn't find it in herself to regret being so forward after something like that.

Furry: What time works for you?

Badylug: Hmm, let's see.

Badylug: Does 5 in the evening work for you?

Furry: Of course! If it works for you, it works for me.

Her insides clammed up.

She was about to type something acknowledging his gentleness, when he replied again.

Furry: Where should we meet?

Badylug: Definitely not somewhere crowded. I want to be able to find you.

Furry: Not somewhere cramped either.

Badylug: Why not?

She had been thinking of them meeting at the place directly. Wherever that was.

Furry: Um

Furry: This is weird.

Furry: I'm not fond of tiny spaces?

Furry: I guess you could say I'm claw-strophobic?

Badylug: That's not weird at all, chaton.

Badylug: There's nothing abnormal about having a phobia.

Furry: Thank you, m'lady.

He sent her a pink heart.

She hadn't even finished smiling at it when the next message came.

Furry: The Trocedaro isn't too crowded in the evening. And it's open and airy.

Badylug: Perfect.

Furry: Purr-fect* >:(

Badylug: Whatever, you clown.

Badylug: And where are we going?

Furry: That's for mew to know and for you to find out.

Badylug: Chaaaaaaaaaaaaat.

Badylug: Is it gonna be some restaurant I've never heard of?

Furry: Oh no, the restaurant is a part of the date, but that's not what I was talking about.

Furry: >:)

Badylug: You're making it sound so convoluted!

Furry: You're saying that like it's a bad thing :P

Badylug: smh

Badylug: In that case

Badylug: I'm taking YOU somewhere too.

Badylug: And I'm not telling you where it is.

She had the perfect place in mind.

Furry: Joke's on you, Badylug. I'm much better at handling surprises than you. I can wait a little longer.

Badylug: :O

Badylug: Meanie.

Furry: It's not my fault I'm so good at waiting for the things I want.

She blinked.

He didn't mean it like THAT, did he?

No, of course he didn't. The stupid cat was just messing around.

She really needed to stop overthinking things like she did with Adrien. She wasn't going to make the same mistake with Chat Noir.

Not that she was going to be pursuing him like she did with Adrien!

Furry: At the end of the day, I just want to have a good time with you.

Badylug: Of course, Chat, isn't that what dates are all about?

Furry: Is that what you want this date to be about?

Badylug: There's nothing I want more.

She let out a breath she didn't realise she had been holding.

Furry: Me too.

Furry: So what will you be wearing?

Seriously? She bared her heart out to him and this was what she got?

Shaking her head, she told herself not to be too disappointed. He felt the same way she did. For now, that was enough.

Badylug : You first, I'm still trying to figure that part out.

Furry: I'm gonna be wearing black sunglasses, and a green scarf.

Badylug: Chat Noir's colors?

She typed with a smile.

Furry: Well of course. What about you?

Badylug: Let's see. How am I supposed to dress? Gee, it sure would be nice to know where I'm going...

Furry: Nice try. I think you can be dressy, but not too fancy either.

I'd say anything classy would work.

Marinette raised an eyebrow at his liberal use of fashion jargon. Did he by any chance work in fashion too? Or was he just flexing those terms at her?

With him, it was always hard to tell.

Badylug: I'll be wearing a red dress with a black jacket. And pink sunglasses.

Furry: Don't tell me you'll be abandoning the spots!

Badylug: Wouldn't dream of it.

She made sure to be coy. She was in a creative mood a few weeks back and she had started working on a jacket with an embroided ladybug in the back.

Badylug: Wait, how do we make sure you don't find some other girl with a red dress?

Furry: Do you have that little faith in me? Of course I'll be able to find you.

Buglady: ..you know I do, but it's better to be safe. Maybe we could use a code?

Furry: Like a question? oooo

Furry: It HAS to be "Has the ladybug landed?"

Badylug: Something tells me you've been picturing this scenario for a long time.

Furry: You haven't the faintest idea .

The color of her cheeks glowed a faint red. He imagined them meeting together like this? He even had a silly phrase ready?

Furry: Bugaboo?

Furry: You there?

Furry: Does the question work for you?

Badylug: Yeah, it totally does!

Furry: Something tells me you're lost in thought.

Something told her he was practically vibrating in excitement.

She may as well join him.

Marinette climbed out of her bed and pulled down her screen. She was a lot of things, but nothing if not meticulous when it came to her schedule.

The first thing she did after reaching home the day he asked her out was to mark the Saturday with a small drawing of a cat and cross down every day that led up to it.

Carefully taking a picture of those two weeks, avoiding anything that led to a clue about her identity, she sent it over to him.

Badylug: Nothing, just totally excited for this Saturday. ;)

She was sure his joy was palpable upon recieving it.

She was proven right when he sent her a screenshot of his calendar, the same date bookmarked with the emoji of a Ladybug.

"Tikki?" Marinette said in a wobbly voice, putting down her phone.

"Yes, Marinette?" The kwami had been quietly chewing on a cookie.

"Do you think I've got it bad?" She asked, trying to calm down her rapidly beating heart.

"Not to be Plagg, but honestly, I think you're screwed."

Getting out of the house was easy. Adrien had to tell Nathalie he was meeting a friend for a project - and she definitely preferred him out of the house rather than bringing some stranger into the house and risk incurring Gabriel's wrath.

The Gorilla offered to give the car, but he politely refused, choosing to walk instead. Getting the car would tip off Ladybug on who he was, and she definitely would not want that.

The hard part? Trying to not freak out and break character and get recognised.

If anyone knew Adrien Agreste was walking around in a pair of hipster sunglasses in dark attire that certainly did not suit his family name - AND on a date with some girl? Forget it. He'd get Ladybug into so much trouble. He'd be grounded till his 30th birthday.

He reached Trocedaro ten minutes early, like he always did for patrol. Not that Ladybug was ever late, it was just him being overly excited to see her again.

So imagine his surprise when he spotted a red dress and a black jacket in the staggering crowd of people.

'Calm down.' he told himself listlessly. This was so like him, going about and singling out the first girl in red as Ladybug.

Besides, they had agreed that she would be the one to approach him. Not the other way around.

So he leaned against the wall, waiting for his date.

If only it was a real date.

He needed to stop calling it that in his head at least. It wasn't a date. He was just hanging out with his best friend. Whether or not she happened to be the same girl he never got over was irrelevant.

His eyes wandered, landing briefly on a group of two boys and three girls strolling through the park, occasionally taking pictures. The girl in red whom he noticed earlier was looking at her phone. M.Ramier was talking to his pigeons again. Adrien silently hoped no one would depress him today. The poor man had been akumatised.....well, they had lost their count somewhere around 70. So it was definitely more than that.

And he really didn't want any heroing to happen during one of the rare chances he had with Ladybug.

'Oh dear god that sounded so selfish.' He shook his head.

His eyes landed on the same girl again.

This time, he lingered longer for some reason. Her dark hair was down and curled, and her knee-length dress, red as blood was fluttering slightly in the spring air. Her black jacket weirdly reminded him of the colour of Ladybug's spots.

No, it couldn't be her. It couldn't be that convenient. Nothing in his life ever came easily to him. He had to earn everything - his grades, his fencing rank, some time with his father....

They were going to have dinner this week, but the trip to Milan had come up.

He had tried to cheer himself up. It's not like his father could cancel an international conference just so he could sit with his son at a dinner table for less than an hour.

Besides, he still got to see Ladybug today...should he text her?

The girl looked up from her phone for the first time in the three minutes he'd been watching her. He inhaled sharply when he saw her wearing pink sunglasses.

She fit all three of Ladybug's descriptions. Maybe...maybe he was right?

She was looking right at him.

She still hadn't looked away so it wasn't a passing glance.

Involuntarily, he raised a hand to wave at her, and she perked up.

He suddenly felt really hot around his neck, despite his jacket collar being popped and despite it being spring.

She walked over to him, and his jaw dropped lightly at her boots. She was wearing boots! Behind Ladybug's mask there was possibly a girl who wore boots with dresses and leather jackets and looked absolutely breathtaking if he couldn't even see her eyes-

"Has...the ladybug landed?" she asked him shyly.

He didn't answer, he was still gaping.

She blinked. "Okay you're definitely my Chat Noir."

HER Chat Noir-

He closed his mouth to keep himself from combusting.

"How did you know?"

He grimaced. He could have sworn he had practiced something clever - but now he couldn't remember it.

She lightly patted his cheek. "Only he would make an expression like that."

"Heh." That was all he could say before he came to his senses. "Hey, bugaboo. I'll have you know I recognised you first."

"You did?? How?" she asked.

"Do you see anyone else here wearing the same colors as you?" He said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Fair." Ladybug said, seamlessly taking the arm he offered her with a suave 'M'lady.'

"Although that's not what tipped me off." he said, trying to tone down his giddiness. Ladybug's hands somehow seemed smaller out of costume.

"Then what did?" she joked, bumping his shoulder. "You looked at me and just knew?"

"I'd normally make a joke out of that, but yeah, that's exactly what happened."

He smiled to himself when he didn't hear her answer. Score!

"So," he heard her talk after a few minutes. "Where are we going?"

"Will it change your opinion on dating?"

"Huh?" she asked, confused.

"You said you would give up on dating if this didn't go well?" he reminded her. Had she forgotten?

"Oh! Oh right! Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm still uh," she became flustered by the minute. "Jury's still out. We've only been walking for five minutes." she turned away.

"Huh." he said, shaking off his light confusion. She really had forgotten.

A small flicker of hope fizzled and went out. He couldn't go down that path again, he told himself sternly.

'No strings attached.' His words. This was just a hangout between friends. He was just encouraging Ladybug to expand her horizons. It was nothing more.

He suddenly caught a flash of something red on her all black jacket.

He craned his head (she was shorter than he expected) to see the back of her jacket. An appreciative whistle left his mouth at the intricately embroidered ladybug.

"If you had been standing with your back to me, this would have been a dead giveaway." He caught her smug smile.

"I made it myself."

She sewed?

The momentary flash of Marinette at a sewing machine left as quickly as it came.

His brain cells really were fried. The minute someone mentioned something related to needle and thread, his head shouted his friend's name.

Not that he could actually see them, but from the crinkles on the side of her eyes, he could tell they were wide behind her glasses. She was waiting for his opinion.

"You like the ladybug?" She asked him eagerly.

'Yes, very much so.' The voice in his head babbled, but he was able to get himself together to utter a "You look beautiful."

She stopped in her tracks for half a second before opening her mouth again. "Sorry, I didn't get you?"

"I said that you look beautiful." He repeated without missing a beat.

Marinette's cheeks were growing pinker by the minute. Her dates had said she looked cute, that she looked pretty, but no one had called her beautiful outright, not with the reverent, sincere expression that Chat was wearing. He still hadn't taken his eyes off of her.

"Thank you." she said, her hand gripping his arm tighter.

She didn't ever actually think Chat Noir wasn't handsome, but she didn't think he would look this good in a jacket with an open collar. Her eyes had lingered on his neck and his hair (messy as always, but with a bit of control to its wildness) than what would be deemed appropriate.

"You don't look so bad yourself!' She said quickly, wanting to be done with the subject already. "So where are we going?"

His soft smile had never wavered.

"Well, how about a movie?"

"I didn't know you liked art films!" Marinette whispered excitedly as they made their way to their seats.

"I wasn't sure if you were a lady after my own 'art'" he said, and she rolled her eyes. "But it seems like my fears were unfounded."

Marinette smiled bittersweetly to herself. "I've wanted to watch 'Portrait de la jeune fille en feu' forever but I don't like watching movies without company." she adjusted her dress.

It never really hit her just how much they didn't know about each other until he had to go to the ticket counter for confirmation by himself so she wouldn't see his name.

"Do your friends not like historical romances?" he asked as he bundled up his jacket and laid it in his lap.

It was still semi-dark, and people were still pouring into the theater.

His dress shirt was unbuttoned two buttons from the top. Tearing her eyes away from that delicious sight, she answered. "Yeah, Al-uh, all my friends like either superhero films or action ones or...." she shuddered. "...horror and gore."

"Not a fan?" he asked, surprised.

"Not of horror." she said. "Don't tell me you are!"

A brief moment of deja vu crossed his mind. A few years ago, Marinette had been kind enough to help him get to this very theater to help him see his mother's film.

She didn't like horror films too.

"No, of course not." he said out loud, before realising that Ladybug had asked him a question. "Oh, uh, nope, not a fan of horror either."

"Phew." she said. "Finally there's someone who gets me!" She said.

Was she even aware of how cute she was?

"Besides," he leaned in to whisper, because the trailers were starting. "I think we're to blame for the market boom in the action genre. People love superheroes, don't they?"

She shrugged. "I mean, after actually doing it on a daily basis, the spark just isn't there when I see it on a screen."

"Interesting." he said. He had never thought of it that way.

He was about to say something, but there were several hushed shushes from their neighbours, so he focused on the film instead.

"Yeah, I don't think we'll be invited in there again." Chat said, trying to hold back his laughter.

She was the first to break. She giggled loudly as they walked out the theater, ignoring the annoyed stares they got.

"Shhh." Chat was saying in between broken peals of laughter.

The two of them had been so chatty during the film, always commenting on the scandal the two main characters had created, loudly pointing out the aesthetics they liked, Chat had been wiping tears from his eyes at the end of the film. She had to quietly pat his back to prevent everyone's attention on him.

They had tried to be quiet, they really did, but he was so talkative and he knew how to hold a conversation, she just couldn't help it. She had spent the entire movie leaned towards him, her hands draped over his armrest as they talked.

It had been like any other day on the rooftop, talking about close encounters and stories about their kwamis.

No wonder everyone in the audience was annoyed with them.

"We were so dumb." Marinette was nearly doubled over in laughter. "Remind me to keep our next movie sessions private. Preferably on a rooftop."

"Are you sure we won't wake up all of Paris with how loud we would be?"

He leaned against the side of the building, trying to catch his breath.

"That was..." He said. "The most fun I've had with anyone."

"At a movie?"

"Ever." he corrected. "I don't get to hang out with my friends a lot, because of...you know, my job. It takes up a lot of my time. So..." He straightened himself up as he looked down at her. "The only friend I see a lot of these days is you."

"Seems like there's barely any competition." Ladybug said, her laughter dying for now.

"There isn't actually." he said, and once again, she was left to be struck at his sincerity. "I don't get to speak as freely with them as I get to do with you. Well, most of them."

She couldn't imagine Chat Noir, the loud, brash, hot headed, yet sweet and good-natured Chat Noir she knew having a hard time being with his friends. She imagined, whoever he was in real life, he was probably the life of the party. Always the center of attention, full of charisma and bad puns.

Looks like that wasn't the case, if she - with whom he had to speak in half-worded riddles - ranked so high.

She wrapped an arm around his waist, pulling him closer to her side. "I feel the same way too."

She didn't elaborate, even as she felt his arm go around her shoulder. If she did, she would go far past the point of no return.

"So, are you hungry?" she didn't miss how his voice cracked a little. "Because I know the perfect place."

Marinette had to pick her jaw off of the floor. He had brought her to one of the most expensive restaurants in the city, a place she wouldn't even dream of going to.

"You coming?" He caught her hand when he saw her getting distracted.

"Who are you?" she asked blankly.

He was taken aback. "Are you sure you want me to answer that?"

"Oh, um, I mean - this place! You can't get here without a reservation made at least a month in advance! How did you even...?"

He smiled, but this time it lacked his usual warmth. He looked downright bitter. "Let's just say being me has its advantages."

"O..kay?" she was even more confused, but he didn't follow up on his weird statement.

When they got to their booth, which looked really nice and cozy, his easygoing smile was back again.

There wasn't a chair, but he didn't let her sit until he helped her remove her jacket. His fingers (his bare fingers!) brushed against the length of her arms and she shuddered even more when she heard him whisper "There you go." against the back of her neck.

This was just two friends hanging out. That was it. It was a part of a silly bet.

"Has your mind been changed yet?" He asked as he sat down opposite her.

"Huh?"

"You seem to keep on forgetting." He said wryly. "Am I that great company?"

"Of course you are." She said without missing a beat. "However, I don't think I can compare being on a date with, well, being with you."

"What do you mean?" He asked curiously.

"When I'm on a date with someone, it's almost always with someone I barely know, and we spend the time getting to know each other. And...I already know you, but I also don't know you - I didn't even realise this was your scene."

His face fell for a moment, and she held up her hand. "I'm not finished. It is weird, but a good kind of weird. And well, I actually like being with you, so that's a definite win."

His face broke into the biggest grin at her words. She wanted to say these things often if it made him look that handsome.

"What can I get you today, monsieur? Mademoiselle?" a waiter interrupted them, looking slightly confused. He was probably wondering why they were wearing glasses inside a building.

He looked to her first, courteously waiting for her to make her choice.

Marinette grimaced sheepishly. "Actually can you order for me? I don't even know what to choose."

"You sure?" He asked.

"Yep. I trust you."

The effect of her simple words was huge. His grin had been wide, but now it turned softer, more lazier somehow.

And it was doing things to her.

"Um, why don't you order for us? I do eat meat!" She said quickly. "I'll just go to the ladies room! Be right back!"

She bolted out of there as gracefully as she could.

"Stupid! Stupid! Stupid!" Marinette was slapping herself.

"Marinette, you need to stop!" Tikki said sternly, "Why are you hitting yourself?"

It was good that she was the only one in the ladies room. She couldn't take any more weird stares.

"Tikki, he went above and beyond for me! He picked a film he wasn't even sure I liked and hoped I would! He brought me to this fancy restaurant whose food I will undoubtedly enjoy because he wanted me to have a good time!! This isn't an actual date, why did he go through all this trouble?!"

"Because he loves you, Marinette." Tikki simply said.

Marinette took off her glasses, blinking away the agitated tears. She didn't need ruined makeup either.

"Come on, Tikki. He doesn't. It's been a long time since...he would tell me everyday just how much he..appreciated me and trusted me and cared about me and..." she struggled to form the next words. "...loved me."

"He still does all those things. He may not say that last one out loud, but that doesn't mean it isn't true."

"Tikki..." Marinette said exasperatedly.

"Yes, it is true, Marinette, and you feel the same way and it's scaring you." Tikki said matter of factly.

"That's a bold claim to make, Tikki, you can't just say things like that!"

"Doesn't make it any less true." Tikki said. 'Why else would you have chosen to bring him to the park where your parents met each other for the first time?"

"I...thought it would be low-key and..."

"Romantic?" Tikki said coyly.

"Stop! No, I'm not in love with Chat Noir, and what he used to have for me is a thing of the past!"

"Marinette..." Tikki sighed. "It's okay if you feel that way."

"Either way, my plans are going to look like a joke compared to his. Why didn't I think of something better?" She slapped her forehead.

"You do realise that he would love whatever you planned, no matter how small it is? He just wants to be with you, and really, that's the only thing that matters. Would you have wanted to spend time with Chat Noir like this even without making definite plans?"

"Yes..."

"And so will he. Trust me." Tikki kissed her cheek.

"What if I go out there and act like the biggest clown ever?"

"He's Chat Noir. No one is a bigger clown than him." Tikki said. "Believe me, I spent several millennia with Plagg, I know what I'm talking about."

Marinette put on her sunglasses. "Alright." she told herself bravely. "Let's do this."

"Oh, there you are. I ordered some sparkling water and soup as an appetizer and a steak for us to share. Is that okay with you because I can change it if you'd like!"

"No! No, that's perfectly okay!" She said shakily, taking note of his wobbling left leg. He was just as nervous as her?

"So, I was going to ask you before you left, what do you want when you do win the bet?"

"You mean, if I still don't want to go on another date after this?

"Yep."

"Hmm..." she said thoughtfully. "I don't know."

"Doubt it." he said, waving it off. "You must want something."

"Oh and you'll give me anything I ask?" She quipped.

"Name it and it's yours."

Okay, how was she supposed to answer that? She wanted to whine about him being way way more sweet to her than she deserved, but she held it in.

"Hm, let's see." She rested her chin on her palm, staring intently into his black sunglasses.

What she would give to see what his eyes were like underneath the mask? Would they still be green?

Well she couldn't ask him that!

"You know what, I'll let you know once we're done here." She said.

"Seriously?"

"Yep. I'm still working my way to it."

He pouted. "Oh fine."

"What about you?" She asked, placing her hand back on the table. "What do you want if you do change my mind?"

"I'll already have gotten what I want." He purred.

"Huh?" Marinette was taken aback.

Adrien gathered up the last bit of courage he had, and took her right hand in his from across the table.

There was still a wide space in the cushion separating both of them. In a perfect world, he could have scooted over closer to her, held her face tenderly in his hands and kissed her, not caring about who was watching.

But this wasn't a perfect world, and he had to make do with pressing a kiss on her bare hand for the first time.

"I will have gotten to be with you like this, without any akumas or powers hanging over us, at least once. I really don't want anything more than that."

She was blushing? Oh dear god he made her blush for the second time today! Was this working? Was he changing her mind?

'Yeah, on the wrong thing you should be changing her mind on.' A voice that sounded like Plagg stopped him.

A small cough from their waiter broke them out of their trance.

"Your meal, monsieur." He politely placed his soup in front of him. "Mademoiselle." He set down Ladybug's bowl.

He squeezed her hand before letting it go. He was about to take his spoon, when suddenly, something stopped him.

Something was different today. He didn't know what it was, but it was eating away at him.

"Bon appetit!" Ladybug said heartily as she began to eat her first spoonful.

That.

That was what was so different.

He took a spoonful of soup, but he wasn't able to swallow it. The lump on his throat was preventing him from doing so.

"Everything okay?" She asked. No wonder, he must have looked constipated.

"Yep!" He gave her a weak smile.

He took another spoon, but it also went the way of the first one.

'Stop crying, stop crying, stop crying'.' he fisted his palm underneath the table, sinking it into the cushion, when suddenly, it was covered by a warm hand.

He opened his eyes to see Ladybug. She had abandoned her food to come and sit next to him.

"Chaton, what's wrong?"

No, he couldn't tell her! She couldn't see him like this!

"Please, tell me." she said, taking his hand and covering it with both of her palms. Her warmth felt heavenly compared to how cold his palms were. "I'm worried, what happened, you look...you look like you are going to cry. What happened? Don't you like the soup?"

"No, no, the soup is fine." he said. "I'm okay, really."

"No, no you're not. And it's okay if you're not. We were talking about everything and nothing when we walked here, and now you've gone really silent. What's going on?"

"Nothing...it's just.." he couldn't help the tiny sniffle that escaped. "This is the first time in 4 months that I'm not having a meal alone."

She was stricken by his declaration. "What?"

"It's stupid, I know-"

"No! It's not stupid!" She said angrily. "No, I- really?"

He nodded, "My father - he's always really busy, he can't always have dinner with me. Sometimes he becomes so busy he cancels the meals he does schedule with me and-" he paused, covering his eyes with his hands and pushing his sunglasses up to his forehead. He turned away from her so she wouldn't see who he was while he wiped his tears.

"I'm okay, I'm okay." He said rapidly, turning back to her with his sunglasses on. "Like I said, it's nothing, it was just a really nice change to eat with someone."

Ladybug had her free hand over her mouth. "That's awful! Who does that to someone?" She was outraged.

"Like I said, he's really busy-"

"No! That's not an excuse to stand up someone you said you'd meet - oh!" she stopped, realising. "Oh my god. No wonder you were so upset when I didn't turn up that day - I am so so sorry!"

"Ladybug, no, that was not your fault." He said fiercely. "You never said you were coming, it was my fault I got my hopes up. Besides, that was years ago and...and you're nothing like him. Believe me."

"Still...I..." Ladybug raised her hand to rub his shoulder. "My poor kitty."

She couldn't imagine not having meals with her family, not telling her parents about her day, listening to her dad bore her with pun after pun. Family mealtimes were just...a constant in her life she couldn’t imagine not having.

It wasn't fair that Chat Noir had to make do with scraps of what she got freely.

If she could, she would never let him have another lonely meal by himself. She would give him all the food he wanted, wrap him in blankets and give him warm tea and never let him go - and -

She loved him.

Shit.

"Ladybug? What are you doing?" He asked, seeing her push back his bowl a little further into the table.

He was surprised when she pulled him into a tight hug, her bare arms wrapped around his shoulders.

He let himself relent in her embrace. She kept on whispering sweet nothings in his ear and stroking his head and she smelt so nice - he could tell when he buried his face in her shoulder.

Another thing to add to his file. She smelt like cookies and bread. And vaguely familiar.

"I'm here for you, no matter what." She said, her hands dropping briefly to his chest. "Anytime you want someone to eat your food with or, you know just hang out, you're texting me immediately."

His mood was brightened up by that time. "There's no one else I'd rather call."

Marinette on the other hand was still reeling from her realization earlier.

She loved Chat Noir.

Probably had for a long time.

She couldn't go back to denying it now that it had hit her over the side of her head.

"Hold up." She said, taking her food on the other side of the table and placing it in front of her.

"Bon appetit?" She asked, scooting herself closer to him.

He nodded so rapidly, that if he were in costume, his bell would have jingled too. "M'lady?" he said, taking his spoon.

"Yes?"

He leaned in and kissed her cheek, just like that day Glaciator attacked, only this time it lingered a bit too long to be platonic.

"Thank you." he smiled crookedly at her.

'You know what, I can freak out later.' Marinette thought haphazardly.

Ladybug had insisted they suit up for getting to the place she had planned on taking him.

He followed her blindly, his head still stuck in the tender hug she had given him.

Her arms had been so small but the strength she must have had to hold him up like that...

He never did stop loving her, did he? He thought exasperatedly.

He gave up. He gave up trying to forget.

Before he could think further, Ladybug landed right in the shallows of.... Bois de Boulogne?

"We can detransform here." She whispered, pulling him behind a tree.

"Spots off."

"Claws in." He was in awe.

"What?" she asked. "Oh, hi Plagg."

Adrien waved to Tikki. "Nothing, I've just never seen you detransform before."

"Oh!" Ladybug blushed briefly. "Uhm, uh, w-would it be okay if Plagg and Tikki hid in my purse together? We're surrounded by people and they wouldn't be found out easily that way."

"Aw yes! Come on, Sugarcube!" Plagg pulled a yelping Tikki into Ladybug's clutch.

"Okay, so why are we here in this park?" Chat asked, letting her pull him into public view. It was nearing sunset, so the only people left behind were either couples or people who had come alone.

"Um, uh," Ladybug was fiddling with her hair. "It's just- you see-"

He held her hand, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles.

"It's okay. Breathe." he said kindly.

That gave her strength to continue.

"Okay, so um, it's actually in this park that my parents met when they were teenagers." She was blushing heavily. "They used to take me here all the time on their wedding anniversary when I was a little kid, and this is the first time I've come here without them."

"Really?" he was fascinated.

"And I know that this isn't much at all compared to what you did, but I didn't know what you were going to do and this seems really lame in comparison-"

He placed a finger over her lips. "Bugaboo, you have no idea how much it means to me that you would bring me here."

He could feel his eyes glazing over again. "Really." He confirmed, seeing the question in her eyes. "The fact that you would bring me to a place that means so much to you - come on, that's better than what I did."

He put his hand down and Marinette was at the verge of asking him to replace his finger with his lips.

"No way! You went all out for me!" She complained as he let him pull her down to sit as always.

"But yours had sentiment!"

"Like yours didn't! You have to stop selling yourself short!"

"Says the actual short person-HEY!" He winced when she shoved him.

"That...barely hurt." He said rubbing the part of his chest she had more or less punched. "Is that all you got?"

"Make one more height joke and you'll find out."

"Tell me something about your parents." He asked pleadingly some time later.

They were sprawled on the grass together, their jackets and scarves in a pile next to them. They had talked about the movie, M.Pigeon, their kwamis, and the brain freeze Ladybug had gotten at the restaurant when she had taken a huge scoop of ice cream. Chat only decided to help her after having a loud laugh at her expense.

She'd say something about identities, and they'd go back to talking about things they could talk about.

"My mom's side of the family didn't approve of them." She said, resting her head on one of her arms. "My dad was...from a different background and they were hesitant about letting her travel so far away. My mom's great uncle is the only one we're still in contact with. Apparently I have a lot of cousins, but I have never met any one of them."

"Huh." He said thoughtfully, watching her hair blow in the breeze.

What would it be like to have a huge family?

Family as far as he was concerned, it was pretty limited. There was Felix and Aunt Amelie, but he barely saw them. His father was an only child and his mother...

"So what did your parents do to convince them?" He asked, instead, turning to his side to look at her better.

She looked at him, taking in his features for a minute before answering. "They didn't."

"Huh?"

"My paternal grandmother helped them elope." She said it half wistfully, half sadly. "They got married here in Paris...and we've been here since."

"I'm sorry." He said, absent mindedly tucking a lock of her hair behind her hair, mindful of her glasses.

"No, don't be. It's fine. I wish I knew my extended relatives but..sadly that's not to be."

Diverting the subject to a topic that would bring her joy, he asked, "I'm betting your parents used to meet up here a lot huh?"

"Oh yeah, they used to meet up here for dates all the time. You see that gazebo over there?" She pointed. "A lot of the time, musicians would play for money or someone would have rented a quartet. My father would ask my mom to dance and they would do so for hours." She said, sitting up.

She let out a tiny laugh. “I wish I could do that.”

‘I wish I had someone to love like that.’ she thought additionally.

“You wanna dance then?” he asked, getting up as well

“Huh?” she spun around to face him.

“Yeah, you said you wish you could dance like that, right?” He said, reaching over and dusting off some of the mud on her shoulders.

Oh.

He had misunderstood what she was trying to say.

Thank goodness.

“A-actually yeah.” She said. “I’d love to, but there’s no music.”

“Music? Is that what you want?” he smirked, pulling out his phone, which noticeably had no phone case.

Suddenly, La Vie En Rose blared from his phone. “There you go.” he put his phone in his pocket. “Now, can I have this dance?” he offered her his hand.

“My answer hasn’t changed.” She said flirtatiously.

He helped her get up, and briefly dusted off his clothes.

He effortlessly pulled her closer by the waist, his hand hovering away from pressing too close, took her hand and placed it on his shoulder, and held the other one loosely.

Marinette was struck by a brief sense of deja vu. A long time ago, Adrien had pulled her in to dance just like that. The same conviction. The same amount of grace.

Wait, no, she couldn’t think about Adrien when she was still trying to process being in love with Chat Noir!

He slowly began to spin them around in time to the music, beaming down at her.

His hand felt firm and strong on her waist, and she was overwhelmed at how many things she was learning about Chat Noir today. He was a good dancer too?

“You’re a great dancer.” She said, letting him pull her closer. Her arm was draped around his shoulders to accommodate the new position.

“You’d be surprised at how many things I’ve been told to learn.” he said, pulling away and spinning her out and back against his chest.

Told to learn?

She didn’t have enough time to appreciate how snug it felt or how firm his chest was when he had spun them back into the main position.

“Very smooth.” She said, laying her head on his broad shoulder.

“Only for you, m’lady. Only for you.” He said, letting his chin press against her temple

“Ow!” She said, pulling away suddenly, but not out of his arms.

“What? What happened?” he asked, alarmed.

“Sorry, no, my glasses were digging into my face.” She said, adjusting them.

“Oh. Oh okay then.” He said. “Does it hurt?”

“No, it’s fine now.” She said.

‘It’s a good thing we aren’t kissing now with glasses on. That would be a disaster.’ she thought, relieved.

“What?” He said, his eyes wide. He had stopped dancing.

Oh crap.

Had she said that out loud?

Judging by his expression, she most certainly had.

“Uh, uh I mean,” Marinette moved out of his arms. “Oh no.” she clapped her hands over her mouth.

“Ladybug did you...did you mean that?”

“NO! I mean, I did, but I didn’t mean to say it out loud and I didn’t want to think that but not in a bad way but it’s not that - OH MY GOD I’M MAKING THIS WORSE!” She shouted into her hands.

Suddenly, she felt a warm pressure on her shoulders.

“Bugaboo?” He didn’t sound peeved.

“Bugaboo, please, look at me?” He begged.

She did, her glasses digging away from her skin.

“Did you mean that? Are you...are you feeling differently towards me?”

She wished now more than ever that she could see his eyes. His green eyes - always so expressive, always so bright. Maybe, just maybe if she could see them, she’d know if she wasn’t too late.

“Y..yes? I..I think I have been for a while but, I didn’t want to tell you because, I don’t know, I thought I was too late. I thought you didn’t love me anymore and -” I didn’t have any right coming back to you now.

“Not love you anymore?” He gaped. “Ladybug, I’ve never stopped being in love with you.”

A weird noise came out of her mouth. If he noticed, he didn’t say anything.

“I’m still in love with you, I didn’t want to keep saying it because I thought you didn’t feel the same way.” He was breathing heavily, his lower lip trembling. He didn’t know if he should smile or grin or cry. “You have feelings for me?” he asked again, hardly believing.

“I love you too.” She barely got the words out, but once she did, her burdened shoulders suddenly became naked.

“I love you too,” She said again, testing out the words. “I love you too - wait. Shit, I love you?!”

“Shit, I love you?” he paraphrased with a choked laugh.

“You have no idea how long I- I didn’t even realise until-” She was spared from making sentences by him pulling her into a tight hug.

He was shaking. Every bit of him was shaking. Any minute now his alarm was going to go off and he would be back in a world where he didn’t have the balls to ask Ladybug out.

Her arms were clawing desperately at his back, clinging to him. “I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry.” She said tearfully. “I’m sorry I didn’t realise sooner, I’m sorry I put you through so much pain.”

“No, m’lady, don’t apologise. Don’t apologise for the past. I’m-” she looked up at him, and his hands were on her shoulders. The song was long over and neither of them had noticed. “I’m just happy for right now. And right now...I love you and you love me too.”

That was enough. That made up for the past 5 years.

“I wish I could see your eyes.” She whispered, her hands holding his cheeks.

“Me too.” He said. “But it’s okay, we don’t have to do this just because...are we together?” he still sounded dazed.

“Yes we are, mon chaton.” she rested her forehead on his. “Yes we are.”

Suddenly, an idea occurred.

This was it.

“I actually know what I want from you, on behalf of the bet.” She said. “I mean, I know that neither of us won but -” she choked out a laugh. “Can you do something for me?”

“Yes, anything. Name it and it’s yours.”

“Chat Noir.” She moved away, and pulled away her sunglasses. “Will you walk me home?”

He was still in shock.

“M-marinette?!” He exclaimed.

Her hands trembled. “Yes, yes it’s me.”

He pushed his sunglasses up to his head. “Hi, Marinette.”

Marinette dropped her sunglasses. “A-adrien?!”

“Yeah?” he said, nervously. “Is...is that bad?” Was being Adrien bad?

“No! No no, no!” She shook her hands. “I’m just…”

“Shocked?” he stepped closer to her, cupping her cheek and wiping away a stray tear.

“Now I know why...why I was thinking of Marinette sometimes when I looked at you.” he said.

“I thought I was going crazy. Why am I thinking of Chat Noir when I’m with Adrien or gee, something about this is familiar? What could it be?” She groaned. “We were so stupid.” “I agree.” He said with a dazzling grin.

“Adrien Agreste?”

“Yes, Marinette Dupain Cheng?”

“Will you walk me home now?”

“Yep.” he pulled her closer by the waist, as he leaned in. “Just as soon as I do this.” he captured his lips with hers, pulling her into a deep kiss that lasted for a long time.

#miraculous ladybug #ladybug #chat noir #ladynoir #civilian dates #fluff #ml fics #my fics #adrienette #marinette #adrien

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illfoandillfie · 4 years

Text

5 Simple Rules for a Successful Fake Relationship: The Proposal

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader

Summery: Your's and Ben's agents approach you about pretending to date in order to boost interest in your new movie.

Warnings: Nothing for this chapter other than some swearing maybe? Things may get a little spicy in later chapters though.

Words: 5843

AN: This fic was written for El @laedymoon for her 1K celebration! I took the trope 'fake dating' and this was the result! Honestly fake dating is one my my fave tropes and I've been wanting to try my hand at it for a while so this was so much fun to write! Originally it was meant to be a one shot but when have I ever been good at sticking to plans lmao? Instead it'll probably end up as a three or four part series, maybe with an epilogue as well, who knows.

I’d also like to point out I started writing this months before we got those photos of Ben and Olivia so this was in no way inspired by anyone’s theories about whether or not their relationship is a PR stunt and I’m not particularly interested in that kind of talk.

Taglist: @laedymoon @dtfrogertaylor @ezmina98 @vee-ndetta @atomic-watermelon @kellypenac @labessieisallama @deakyclicks @jennyggggrrr @drowseoftaylor @hannafuckingsucks @i-cant-hangout-im-drumming @queenmylovely @supersonicfreddie

You’d known fake celebrity relationships were a thing that happened, you just never expected to be approached about one. But, here you were, sat next to Ben in an office usually reserved for producers meetings, a slight frown on his face as he listened to your agents explain how beneficial it would be if the public believed you were a couple. “It’ll be good for the movie,” your agent, Mary, said matter-of-factly, “Studies show that if people – particularly women ages 15 – 45, the exact demographic we’re targeting – believe a real romance sprouted during the course of filming a movie, they are 78% more likely to see the movie. Plus, your names in the tabloids mean more exposure for both of you which means more offers in future, no matter how well this movie does in the box office. It’s all about being seen, people knowing your names.” “Are you serious?” Ben asked slowly, glancing to you, as if trying to determine your reaction. “Look, Ben, obviously we can’t force you or Y/N to do this,” his agent, Peter, introduced to you moments before, said, “the movie has already started filming and everyone appreciates your opinions, so saying no isn’t going to affect your jobs. But,” he paused, making sure the words were getting through to you both, “we strongly recommend you consider it. There are enough pros to make it worthwhile and it would only have to last until a week or two after the premiere. We can give you the rest of the day to think it over and make your decisions, but we will require an answer by tomorrow morning. If you agree, we can discuss terms and get everything in order to run the first story early next week.”

You and Ben left, tempted to laugh at the strangeness of your morning. “Think I need a coffee after that. You wanna come over to my trailer for a cup?” “Yeah, okay, sounds good,” you followed him quietly for a moment, thinking over the conversation you’d just been part of, “What do you think?” “About what? Coffee? You know I love it,” “Not coffee, the whole pretending to date thing,” “Oh that,” you could almost hear his eyes roll. “You don’t think it’s worth it?” He paused. “Saying no won’t hurt my feelings,” you nudged his shoulder, hoping to ease his obvious discomfort, “it is a weird situation.” “Weird is an understatement. And weren’t you with that Luke guy, what would he say about it?” “He’ll say nothing since we’re not seeing each other anymore,” “Wait, what?” “Yeah that lasted like three dates and went nowhere, I haven’t seen him in weeks.” “Oh, sorry.” You shrugged, “What’s there to be sorry for, he was boring. Anyway, we were talking about you and me.” “Right, that.” Ben opened the door to his trailer and waved you inside, following you over the threshold, “What do you think about it?” “I’m not opposed to it. We already spend a lot of our time pretending to date anyway.” Ben chuckled as he flicked the small kettle on, grabbing your two mugs and the instant coffee. “Plus it would be good to get our names out there a bit more. And we're friends, right?” After the weeks of pre-production costume fittings and script read-throughs you certainly thought you were friends and hoped Ben did too. “Of course we’re friends doofus,” “Thanks dweeb. But that means it'll be fun getting to hang out and stuff.” “So, wait, you think it’s a good idea?” “Well it can’t hurt, can it?” Ben frowned, forehead creased, “Don’t you think it’s all a bit, well, daft? As if us dating, real or not, would really have an impact on the movie, I think that’s bullshit. Plus, y’know, the work we’d have to put in to making it seem real or whatever. That’s just inviting extra stress into our lives and extra work which it doesn’t sound like we’d be getting paid for. Acting’s fun but I don’t want to spend every waking moment doing it.” “Well it wouldn’t be every waking moment would it? Just the ones when they had photographers around. They’ll get a few photos of us leaving set holding hands or out having dinner together and spin it into a big romantic story and all we’d have to do is hold hands and have dinner. And you can’t call bullshit when they had actual statistics to back them up.” “It sounds like you’re trying to convince me.” “No, if you don’t want to I don’t mind, but I also don’t see anything wrong with it. And I think you should actually think about it instead of writing it off instantly.” “So if I said I was into it, you’d want to?” You shrugged, “Yeah. I want this movie to do well, I want this job to go somewhere. And if I have to date you to make that happen I will. That sounded better in my head. I just mean that I’m happy to pretend to date you, even if I wouldn’t in real life, no offence.” “I’m a little offended,” he chuckled, “but really can’t argue with that can I?” “If you’re not comfortable with it, say so and we’ll tell them no,” Ben paused, staring at you as he considered what you’d said, quiet for so long you were sure he was going to say he wasn’t interested. You were about to put him out of his misery and tell him you didn’t want to anymore when he spoke up. “They did say it would be good for the movie and out careers,” “Someone’s coming around,” you sing-songed, taking the mug he offered you. “Alright, I admit, maybe not as awful an idea as I first thought. There are…some pros anyway. And I guess we can hear the terms and then make up our minds properly.” “Aww, looks like I got myself a boyfriend,”

The next morning you found out what you were in for if you did agree to it. Once again both of your agents were waiting in the office but this time a third person was with them when you arrived. “Y/N, Ben, take a seat. This is Barry, he’s a representative from Paramount Pictures.” Barry, with his salt and pepper hair and well cut suit, leaned forward in his seat to shake Ben’s hand and then yours with a pleasant greeting. “Well,” Mary spoke up, “have you made a decision?” Ben looked to you before he spoke, “It’s a tentative yes from both of us. We’d like to hear a bit more about it before we fully agree but, so far, it sounds okay.” “Glad to have you on board,” Barry said, reaching into his bag and pulling out a manila folder full of paper. “In that case, the terms,” Peter said, glancing around to make sure everyone was ready, “If you do agree, we’ll need you to sign some paperwork stating you understand your obligations and all that, so take a copy of these,” he took two small stapled documents from Barry, handing you each one, before passing another to Mary, “just so everyone has all the info at hand.” “Are these the terms?” “Yes. Don’t worry, we’ll explain, but it’s all laid out in there if you need clarification.” “There’s more pages than I was expecting,” Ben said, already sounding like it was becoming too much work to worry about. “You don’t have to worry about the last few pages, it’s mostly just legalese. Essentially, you’ll be required to act like a couple in public. That’s really all there is to it, though contractually it’s a little more complex.” “What does that mean?” “We just need you both to agree to perform specific relationship type moments that we can sell. For instance, Y/N, we will need you to be spotted by paparazzi leaving Ben’s apartment a couple of times. Or vice versa. It is the 21st century afterall.” “You mean like a walk of shame?” you asked, glancing at the paper in your hand. “That’s not the official term on the contract but it’s more or less correct. You’ll need to change clothes, make it look like you stayed the night even if you didn’t really.” “Wouldn’t it be more traditional to wear the previous day’s gear?” “Perhaps but if you’re in the same clothes as the day before the paparazzi can’t sell the photos as easily because they can’t prove they were taken on different days. We want to make these photos easy to sell and easy to circulate. To that end, some paparazzi and gossip blogs will be tipped off by the studio and hopefully word will spread as the buzz around you gets stronger.” “There will also be required dates, of course. At least one of them needs to take place at the French restaurant Boucher because they have a partnership with the studio. There is also a clause about an argument, provided people become interested in your relationship and we keep it going all the way to the premiere.” “Wait, an argument?” Ben flipped through his papers, trying to find the right section. “You just have to be caught arguing, or at least looking like you’re angry and about to fight, just so we can sell the whole trouble in paradise storyline.” “People like conflict,” Mary shrugged, “Otherwise all we need is the two of you to act like a couple in public, maybe a few social media posts, from now until a week after the theatre release. After that you’re free to ‘break up’, though you will also need to sign a non-disclosure agreement which will stop you from talking about it for a few years. We’ll organise a few magazines and gossip sites to run stories about the split and, depending on how the public react to your story, may later run some Ben and Y/N, back together question mark type pieces, entirely fabricated of course.” “You will attend the premiere together and, obviously, do press together. We will tell reporters not to ask about your personal lives, so no one suspects the relationship to be fake, though a few questions may slip through. Though we don’t expect this movie to earn any award nominations since it’s not being marketing for any there may be some later down the track. In that case we may ask you to extend your relationship long enough to attend the ceremonies together, provided you aren’t working on other projects at the time.” “The only other requirements are that, a few times a week you allow yourselves to be seen in public. Hand holding, kissing, really sell the whole fallen in love thing. That’s it really.” “And we can’t even tell our families?” “One leak is all it would take to have this revealed. You tell your mum who accidentally lets slip to the neighbour who sells it to a magazine. And if it’s revealed it could be harmful when it comes to box office numbers, which is the exact opposite of what we want. But enough of these have been done so that we know how to manage them, and all you have to do is keep quiet about it and act like you’re in love. Easy. Are you both on board?” Barry, who’d been quiet throughout the meeting, leaned forward expectantly. You already knew what to say, "I’m in if Ben is,” Ben chewed his lip as he skimmed over the paper in his hands again. He sighed and raised his eyes to where Barry sat, waiting. “I don’t know I-” You’d seen it coming, his answer. Really it wasn’t much of a surprise. Ben didn’t strike you as the sort of person to go in for schemes like this and he’d been hesitant from the second it was suggested. You heard him sigh again as his gaze landed on you and you wondered if he thought less of you for wanting to be part of it. “Okay. I’m in.” You were a little stunned by his change of heart but you were the only one. Everyone else in the room seemed relieved and a little frantic, Barry reaching back into his bag, Mary and Peter talking over each other to assure you both that you’d made the right choice. “Glad to hear that, Ben,” Barry was saying as he pulled out another folder of documents, “Now, we’ll need you to both to sign here.”

After shooting was done for the day you accompanied Ben to a small pub for a drink. Mary and Peter had left the meeting on their phones making hurried calls to get photos of the two of you leaving the set together. You’d jumped a little as Ben grabbed your hand before realising why his fingers were linked through your own. It was warm and he didn’t let you go until you reached the pub, the snap of cameras audible as you walked down the street. You found a booth while Ben headed to the bar, returning a little later with a drink in each hand. “One G and T for my girlfriend,” he laughed as he put the drink in front of you and slid into the seat opposite. “Y’know if you told me last week that I’d have had a boyfriend before we finished filming and that it was you, I would have laughed.” “God me too. Our jobs are so bizarre. Literally what other profession would encourage you to pretend to date?” You laughed and pulled out the papers you’d been given that morning, “And who’d have thought there’d be so many contractual requirements.” “We should add our own set of rules. Like just so we’re clear about what we’d be uncomfortable doing or whatever.” “Safewords?” “Get your mind out of the gutter. Christ, you fake ask a girl out and suddenly all she can think about is sex.” “My mind was in the gutter long before we were set up.” He let out a huff of laughter and shook his head, reaching for his glass. “I know what you mean though. We should definitely define some things,” you grabbed your bag and began digging through it for a pen. When you found it, you turned the papers over giving you a blank canvas to work on, “Firstly sex.” “Should have known,” “May as well start with the big one. Rule 1: No Sex. Completely off the table.” you took a sip of your drink as you began jotting it down. “Your wank game strong?” The conversation was interrupted as you choked on your drink, finally recovering enough to splutter, “excuse me?” “Well it sounds like we might be together for a while. Can’t go on any tinder dates or anything since that would look like cheating. You sure you can last that long? “100 per cent.” “Alright, if you’re sure. Rule one, no sex.” You finished writing it down, rolling your eyes, “What about PDAs? We have to do some but is there anything you’d be uncomfortable with?” “I’m not really one for like public make out sessions,” “Thank god, me neither.” “Okay, good. What about cuddling and that kind of thing. Man this is weird to talk about,” “Yeah, is a bit. I can do some cuddling in public but y'know, nothing too much. Hugs are fine, an arm around my shoulders is fine. Holding hands is obviously okay.” “What about an arm around the waist?” “Hmmm….maybe. Yeah, I think I’d be okay with that. But your hand never goes below my lower back. I will have no arse grabs or pinches or hands in my back pocket.” “Wasn’t planning on that but good to know. Does cuddling include lap sitting?” “Absolutely not.” “Okay, strong boundaries, I respect that. You going to write all that down?” “Rule 2: PDAs kept respectable and to a minimum. And rule 3: hands above the belt at all times. What about our families and friends?” you asked as you made notes on acceptable PDAs, “chances are we’re going to have to deal with them at some point since they’re going to think it’s real.” “Okay, um, how about…no meeting anyone unless there’s a reason like a family gathering you’d be expected to bring a partner to. And if that does come up we can work out a game plan then.” “Make sense. Rule 4: No families unless no escape.”

By the time you left the pub, your list of rules tucked into your bag, it was quite late. “Hey, you wanna crash at mine tonight?” Ben asked, “we can text Peter and Mary, let them know so they can organise paparazzi for the morning.” “Tonight? I don’t have a toothbrush or a change of clothes or anything.” “We’ll pop into a shop and buy you a new toothbrush, should probably get you one for my place anyway since apparently you’ll be staying over more than once. And I’m sure I’ve got something you can sleep in.” “And tomorrow? Can’t wear this again in case we get photographed.” “I’ll give you something and then I’ll drop you home in the morning,” he shrugged. “I guess that would work,” “C’mon, it’ll be like a sleepover. Stay up late and talk about boys, have things devolve into a sexy pillow fight, sleepover stuff.” “And you say my mind lives in the gutter.” “That’s not a no,” “Alright, I’ll crash at yours. Closer to here than mine is anyway.” “Awesome,” he grinned at you, “c’mon, this way….babe?” “Didn’t sound so convincing there, Ben,” you snorted. “You should have used a pet name then, instead of my actual one. And I was just testing the waters, what’d you think?” “Babe’s okay. As long as we don’t get into weirdly cutesie things like turtle dove or snookums.” “You don’t want me to call you snookums? How about cuddle bunny? Pumpkin pie?” “Oh fuck off,” “Think you mean fuck off honey bear.” “Rule 5: Standard pet names only!”

As much as he clearly enjoyed teasing you, Ben made sure you had a good time with him. He took your hand again but it was only so he could pull you into the warmth of a small Chinese restaurant. It was one he seemed to regularly visit judging by the way the man at the counter knew Ben’s order straight away. He seemed a little surprised when Ben asked to add extra dishes, eyes darting to your entwined hands, and then back to Ben’s face, but he said nothing, just cheerily gave Ben the new price. “What was that about?” you asked as you walked the last block to Ben’s door, each of you carrying a bag, his full of food and yours supplies from the grocery store, “the look he gave you when he saw me?” “Oh, that’s nothing. I used to go to that place a lot with my ex and then we broke up and I kept going on my own cause it’s close and it’s fucking good food. But, um, they know me pretty well and I guess it’s been a while since I took a girl there.” “Well I’m flattered that you chose me to be part of this touching moment,” you laughed and followed Ben to his front door, taking the second bag from him so he could pull his keys from his pocket and let you in. You’d never been inside Ben’s place before so you let him lead you down the hallway towards the kitchen, taking charge of pulling everything from the bags as Ben got out plates and cutlery. “Oh shit, hang on gotta text Mary and Peter,” You took over dividing up the food as Ben dug his phone out of his pocket. A few seconds after he’d sent the message and put his phone down a ding made him snatch it back up again. “Peter says there’ll be someone here to snap us while we leave. They want us to kiss if possible. Guess it’s really started then,” “Guess so. Can I ask one thing?” “Sure,” he said it slowly, almost nervously. “Why’d you change your mind about this? I thought for sure you’d say no.” “Oh, that. I don’t know, I guess I figured it wouldn’t hurt, especially if it was going to benefit the movie. C’mon, don’t want this to go cold,” You weren't sure you believed him but you let him shrug off the question as you picked up your plate and followed him into the living room. The next couple of hours were spent eating and watching trashy reality tv shows, making jokes at their expense. You and Ben kept talking long after the show ended, until he realised how late it was getting. “Better turn in otherwise I won’t get up in the morning,” he laughed. “Yeah, probably a good plan,” you stretched out on the couch, placing a cushion under your head. “C’mon, I’ll show you to your room.” “You mean I’m not sleeping on the couch?” “Oh my god you’re a dork,” he threw another cushion at you, “I have a spare room you can use.” “Well I didn’t know that,” you laughed as you pushed yourself to your feet, following him back down the hallway towards a closed door you hadn’t noticed before. “Nah, you’re all good. It’s honestly mostly used by my friend Joe when he’s travelling over this way. There’re clean sheets in the linen press in the bathroom which is the next door on the right, and extra blankets in the cupboard just there. Also watch the blinds if you try to close them, they can be a little stiff. If there’s anything else you need let me know, my bedroom is at the end of the hall, near the living room.” “Some PJs would be good, if it’s no trouble.” “Oh right, yeah of course, give me a second.” You dropped your bag in a corner of the room and then popped into the bathroom to grab some sheets. Ben came back with an old t-shirt and some flannel pants. “These are mine so they’ll probably be a bit big but they’ll be fine for the night. And they’ll look good for the camera in the morning.” “Thanks,” “That everything?” “Think so, night Ben,” “Night, snookums.” “Rule five mister,” Ben just laughed, pulling your door shut behind him.

Waking up in Ben’s spare room was mildly confusing. The bed faced a different direction than yours did, the blinds blocked out too much of the morning light, and the sheets felt different. But the previous night came back to you and then the reason you were staying at Ben’s did too. It made you too nervous to go back to sleep, too restless to stay there, so you got up and stumbled to the door, opening it just in time to see Ben leaving the bathroom. “Morning,” he groaned with half shut eyes and sleep mussed hair, “you want a coffee?” “Please. Thanks.” He yawned, acknowledging your answer with a nod and left the bathroom to you. When you were done you found him in the kitchen with a steaming mug of coffee in his hands and a second on the bench in front of him. You took it gratefully, letting the warm caffeine wake you up.” “Breakfast? I can offer you toast or cereal unless you wanna wait for pancakes to cook.” You shook your head, “Don’t normally eat breakfast,” Ben looked aghast, “You know breakfast’s important, right?” “Shhh, lemme wake up before you start lecturing me,” Ben smiled into his own mug, falling silent until you’d downed half your drink, “You good now? Alert?” “Close enough. Please don’t tell me about breakfast though.” “I wasn’t going to. There was another text from Peter this morning.” “What’d it say?” “Well, a photographer will be here around nine-ish ready for us, but they said he’ll stay for as long as we take.” “Okay.” “And, um, he was very careful in how he worded it, but they want us to look like we fucked. Also I told them I’d take you home so there may be someone waiting for us there too, he never got back to me on it.” “Shit, okay. Umm, guess I’ll just wear this then?” you indicated the pyjamas you’d borrowed, “might lose the pants though, help sell it a bit more.” “Yeah, guess so,” Ben cleared his throat and took a sip of coffee, his eyes firmly fixed over your shoulder. “What time is is?” “Uhhhh,” he glanced at the oven, “Twenty past eight.” “God I haven’t been up this early on a weekend in months.” “Not one for farmers markets or anything then?” “Not really. Much prefer lying in bed doing nothing.” “Me too,” “We’re meant for each other,” you laughed, “did you want to have a shower or anything?” “Nah, you can if you want though,” “Might as well wait until I get home. But I am gonna clean my teeth, especially if we have to kiss.” “Maybe mess up your hair too, make it look like you didn’t sleep much.” “Well how could I when you’re such a good lover,” “I know you’re joking but if anyone asks, I’m incredible. You came like three times.” “Did I now?” “Of course.” “Good thing no one’s gonna ask then, don’t think I’m great at lying.” “You’re an actress, Y/N. Besides, it’s not really a lie, I am that good. You just haven’t experienced it personally.” You poked your tongue out at Ben as you stood and headed towards the bathroom again but you did as he’d suggested and messed your hair up as much as you could.

“How do I look?” you ask Ben when you were done. “Gorgeous,” he said, eyes raking over every inch of your appearance from the ruffled hair to the hint of panda eyes you’d manufactured with your eyeshadow to the slightly unbuttoned flannel shirt and missing pants. “But do I look like I’ve been thoroughly fucked?” “Oh, right, umm, yes I think so,” “You do? I feel like theres something missing.” You darted back into the bathroom to look in the mirror again, “Oh! I know. Might be taking it a bit far though.” “What is it?” Ben asked, following you and watching you in the mirror. “What if you gave me a hickey?” “Y/N, I-” “Yeah, I know, that’s a weird thing to ask. Don’t worry, I think we’ll be fine without it.” Ben’s cheeks puffed up with air that he slowly let escape his lips, “no, you’re right, if I’d really slept with you last night I would have marked you up a bit. A hickey will definitely make it look more authentic.” “It’s not totally inappropriate for me to ask?” “No, no, we have to make it look legit, it’s a good suggestion. Here, I’ll uhh,” he stepped in close, one hand tentatively winding around your waist to pull you back against him, the other moving to push your hair aside. His breath was hot as he leaned into your neck. You saw him glance at your reflection, eyebrows slightly furrowed, but then his lips were on your skin, sucking at you until a bruise formed. Your own breath quickened with the contact but you knew it was just because he’d found a particularly sensitive spot and it had been a while since anyone had handled you like that. It was still just Ben and it was still part of your jobs. But all the same you let your eyes slip shut and hummed at how nice it felt. You were almost disappointed when it was over. Ben stood there for a moment, head bent over your neck, long enough to take a deep breath, but then he seemed to collect himself, taking a quick step back. “Will that do?” “It’s great Ben, really ties the whole look together.” Ben returned your smile but it didn’t quite reach his eyes, “Good. Good. Okay then, I’ll umm, what time is it?” “Just after nine,” you said, glancing at your phone, “wonder if the photographer is here yet.” “I think I will jump in for that shower actually, by the time I’m done he definitely will be.” “Okay,” “Make yourself comfortable though, watch some TV or something.” “Alright. Thanks for being so cool about all this. I know you’re a little sceptical about the benefits and everything.” “It’s fine, Y/N, no need for any of that.” He smiled again as you left the bathroom and the door shut behind you, but it still seemed off.

You settled onto the couch to flick TV channels, pausing at a breakfast news show and then at some kids cartoon you didn’t recognise, only stopping when Ben entered the room, clean and dressed. “Hey, I was wondering,” you said, turning towards him, “should I give you a hickey as well?” “No,” You were a little taken aback by how quickly he’d answered. “I mean, I think that’d be overkill. Keep it up our sleeves for next time, yeah?” “Okay, yeah, sure,” “Is he there?” “I think so.” Ben walked towards the window and twitched the curtain aside just enough to peek out, “Yeah, looks like him. Big camera pointing at my front door.” “Okay,” your heart began to beat a little faster, “show time then,” “Show time.” Ben nodded as he turned back to you. “Do we have a plan? I kinda wish I had a script right about now,” Ben laughed a little and you thought he seemed more himself, “I think you should go out first so they can get a good clean shot and then I come out after, maybe with my hand on your back?” “Sounds good,” “Okay, umm, I’ll lock the door and when I turn around you kiss me and then I’ll open the passenger door for you and we’ll drive to your place.” “Don’t bother opening my door. I’m not big into that kind of gesture, plus I think if we were actually being caught by the paparazzi, we’d be getting into the car as quick as possible. Maybe throw a look his way like you aren’t happy about being photographed just so it doesn’t seem too staged.” “Okay, no opening doors, noted.” You shrugged, “I just think it’s a bit old fashioned and unnecessary,” “I’ll keep that in mind for our dates. You ready to do this?” You nodded and stood up, leading the way to the front door. Ben collected his keys and wallet and placed a hand on the lower part of your back, your signal to open the door and step outside. “Kinda wish I had pants on,” you said softly, “It’s a bit brisk,” Ben chuckled as he followed you out, “We’ll put the heating on in the car for you,” he turned to lock the door. You watched him, fingers gripping the key a little tighter than he perhaps normally would, and as soon as he began to turn back around you were moving towards him, one hand thrown around his neck, the other in his hair as your pressed your lips to his. His hand found your back again, pulling you in close as he kissed you back fiercely, as if he were unwilling to let you go after such a good night together, the kiss of a man falling in love. For half a second you forgot it was an act. And then he was gone, his nose brushing yours briefly before there was space between you. You felt a little dazed with Ben looking at you so softly but you took a deep breath and reality came back to you. With another breath your turned and headed towards the car, able to hear the rapid click click click of the camera. You shot a look towards the noise and then got into the car, Ben hopping into the driver’s seat about a second later.

“You’re a good actor,” you said before silence could settle between you, “I already knew that, of course, but the kiss was really good. Almost completely believable.” “As long as it’s believable enough in the photos,” “I’m sure it will be. I think we pulled it off.” Ben nodded, “Yeah. You still chilly?” “Little bit,” He reached over and twisted one of the dials blindly, warm air suddenly washing over your goosebump covered legs, “better?” “So much, thanks.” “I think he might be following us,” “You did tell them we were going to mine, s’pose he’ll be trying to grab a couple of shots of us there.” “Yeah, probably.” “Should we come up with another game plan? Maybe you walk me to my door, we stand there talking for a bit, saying goodbye. I stay and watch you leave before I go inside.” “Perfect. Is another kiss part of the goodbye?” “Careful Ben, you sound almost like you want to kiss me,” you laughed, “but yes, think it needs to be.”

It went completely according to plan. By the time you were getting out of the car the photographer had pulled up outside your house, his camera sticking out the window of his car so he didn’t miss his shot. The camera clicked as Ben took your hand and you led him to your door. “Well, guess that’s it for today. I did have fun with you last night, even if it wasn’t the kind of fun everyone else will think it was.” “Yeah, me too. Happy to have you stay anytime you want to be photographed again. Maybe we’ll get you some PJs that can live at mine though.” “Probably for the best. If this goes well I can see them wanting us to do it again soon.” “Oh definitely. They’ll probably have notes for us so we can get an even better performance next time. You ready to wow them with another kiss?” “Lay it on me, babe,” “Anything you want, snookums,” You groaned but before you could protest too much Ben was kissing you again, softer than before, no longer trying to convince you to stay, just trying to prolong the moment before the goodbye. It left you a little breathless as he cupped your cheek, leaving his hand there when he pulled away. As you opened your eyes you saw him bite his lip and then he leaned in to leave you with a final chaste peck before his fingers slipped from your skin and he was walking away. You let out a long exhale as you watched him go, waving as the car took off. Once you were alone inside, the door firmly shut behind you, you laughed at how ridiculous the whole arrangement was. But at least Ben was a good kisser. Not too firm, not too wet, just the right amount of tongue. Believable enough to give you butterflies.

#my writing #my fics #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy imagine #ahhhh #this was fun #i hope ya'll like it

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kpop-zone · 4 years

Text

The Days of Spring | Lalisa

Genre: angst, fluff

Wordcount: 4,120

Request: Can you make a scenario with lisa where you and her have been dating for a few years and only the members know about it. But yg’s been forcing her to go out with jungkook cause it’s good for publicity + the lizkook shippers are intense so you question if you should leave her to help her career. But since everything’s affecting your relationship she cant take it anymore and tells the world she’s gay and you guys are dating and everyone turns out being supportive

Is the coast clear?

You texted Lisa while you were sitting in your parked car a few blocks away from the dorm. Despite already dating for three years, you still had to sneak around like teenagers.

Yes

Lisa answered and you sighted, putting on your baseball cap and a mask. Your face was completely covered now, and you could dare to get close to Blackpink’s dorm. The paparazzi was everywhere and the two of you couldn’t risk anyone making up theories, because of how often you frequented the dorm. With quick steps and your head ducked low, you made your way to the gate of the property where one of Lisa’s managers let you in after checking a last time that no one was filming you.

It was an exhausting procedure, but it was routine already. Silently you rode the elevator to the right floor with the manager, knowing that he was disapproving of you being here. YG had found out about your relationship rather soon, because both of you knew that it was impossible to keep your relationship a secret from her company and the public. They didn’t approve of your relationship, but they did not disapprove either. They simply tolerated it as long as it didn’t compromise Lisa’s career.

The manager accompanied you to the door where he looked at you sternly.

“Be sure to leave until 10pm. Lisa has practice tomorrow morning. She needs her sleep.”

You flashed him a fake smile, but as soon as he turned his back to you, it faltered, and you rolled your eyes instead. As if Lisa wasn’t old enough to decide when she needed to go to bed herself. You opened the door with your spare key and took off your shoes once you stepped into the apartment.

When you made your way to the living room, you frowned. Something was bothering you.

It was unusually quiet in the dorm.

Normally music was blasting out of one of the girl’s room, someone was bickering, or they were all cuddled up on the couch, watching some TV. But right now, you couldn’t hear a sound, and no one was in sight. Confused you made your way to Lisa’s room, where you could see Chaeyoung sitting on the edge of your girlfriend’s bed through a crack in the door. She was whispering something, and it seemed like she was comforting Lisa.

Concerned you opened the door, making both of the girls whip their head around in surprise.

“Y/N.”

Chaeyoung exclaimed shocked and you shifted your gaze between the two girls.

Commiseratively, Chaeyoung looked at Lisa a last time before getting up and squeezing your hand while passing you to leave the room.

“What is going on?”

You asked curiously and Lisa looked at you with sad eyes.

“I’m so sorry.”

She whispered, while a tear rolled down her cheek and you immediately stumbled to her side, scooping her up into your lap, letting her rest her head against your chest.

“Hey it’s ok. Why are you apologizing?”

You voiced your confusion, but Lisa stayed silent.

Therefore, you just kept holding her in your arms, waiting for her to be ready to talk. It had been quiet for a while now and you had already started zoning out, causing Lisa’s sudden voice to startle you.

“They are making me date Jungkook.”

Lisa’s voice was silent, but her words were clear, and you had no trouble understanding them acoustically. Nevertheless, you couldn’t process her words, making you push her away a bit to be able to look into her face.

“What?”

You hoped that you had only misunderstood her, but when she looked at you in regret, you knew that you hadn’t.

“Blackpink has received a lot of negative press lately, because of the delay of the album launch. Therefore, YG decided that we need a distraction and good publicity.”

Lisa trailed her sentence off, apparently not wanting to give you more information, but you kept staring at her expectantly, so she sighted loudly.

“A lot of people ship us with the BTS members. So YG struck a deal with Big Hit. Jungkook has been struggling with unbeneficial dating rumors lately, so they are going to feed the press that we’re dating to eliminate those rumors and distract everyone from our delayed album.”

Finally, Lisa looked at you and you could see how uncomfortable she was right now. But you didn’t have the words to make her feel better.

“But.. we’re dating.”

You stammered, not being able to grasp that YG would do something like that to you.

“And that isn’t going to change. I swear, there will be nothing going on between Jungkook and me. We just have to go on some fake dates, so the paparazzi will be able to snap a few pictures of us.”

Lisa scrambled to her knees now, cupping your face and looking deeply into your eyes.

Of course, you believed her, but that didn’t mean that it didn’t hurt. For over two years YG knew that you were dating, and they still didn’t allow the two of you to go public. You had to hide and weren’t even allowed to be seen next to Lisa. But someone like Jungkook could be portrayed with her.

“Could you please say something, Y/N?”

Lisa’s shaky voice ripped you from your train of thoughts and you tried to muster your best smile.

“Well if it’s the best for both of your groups, I don’t mind.”

You tried to sound positive, but your voice betrayed you.

“Y/N...”

Lisa breathed, but you removed her hands from your face.

“It’s fine, Lisa. Don’t worry. I know this is just for publicity.”

You stated while climbing off the bed.

You walked to the kitchen and Lisa quickly followed you.

“We...”

Lisa started, but you immediately cut her off.

“I don’t want to talk about it anymore, Lisa, ok? I said, I’m fine. So just leave it at that.”

You retorted and Lisa closed her mouth, looking at you taken aback.

You didn’t intend to upset her, but you could really not talk about her relationship with Jungkook right now. You wanted to forget this new gained information as quickly as possible. Nevertheless, you wanted to show her that you were not mad at her, so you interlaced your fingers with her after you had gotten some snacks and pulled her to the couch.

Lisa rested her head on your shoulder, and you wrapped your arms around her like always, but it didn’t feel the same anymore. Lisa’s burning gaze was laying on you and there was this tensed atmosphere in the room, but you pretended to not notice it.

You just needed some time, you told yourself. You could come to terms with this fake relationship.

But this task turned out to be harder than you had thought.

Your plan had been to simply ignore this PR stunt. You knew that Lisa would come home to you at the end of the day. What she did in the meantime was none of your business. But it wasn’t possible to ignore the news of the year.

After Jungkook and Lisa had been shipped for years, their relationship was finally confirmed and both fandoms went absolutely wild. As well as the paparazzi. In every newspaper, every magazine and on every social media channel, they reported about your girlfriend’s newfound love, making you wish that you could close your eyes to all of this.

The pictures were the worst part. Jungkook and Lisa had already gone on three “dates” together and if you weren’t dating Lisa, you’d probably melt at the snapshots, the paparazzi had taken. They looked cute together. Wide smiles were plastered on their faces in every picture and they were always shyly holding each other’s hands.

You felt nauseous every time you looked at the pictures.

But YG’s plan seemed to be working. No one was talking about the delayed album anymore and the sales of both groups had skyrocketed.

Normally, news like that would have made you happy. You would have come to Blackpink’s dorm to drink Soju with the girls while Lisa laid in your arms, letting her fingertips softly caress your skin.

But now you could feel yourself distancing yourself from your girlfriend. The paparazzi had managed to get into your head. Would it be so bad if Lisa dated Jungkook? Of course, you would be heartbroken, but love wasn’t about selfishness. And it was selfish to keep calling Lisa yours, if she could thrive with someone like Jungkook by her side. Her fans would be appeased, and her company would surely give her more benefits if they’d see that the sales would continue to increase.

With your heart being torn in two, you made your way to the dorm. Your face concealed and your steps heavy. Once again, you found your girlfriend’s room empty, meaning that she was on one of her dates with Jungkook again. Tiredly you slumped down on Lisa’s bed, waiting for her return to do the inevitable.

It was almost midnight when she finally returned, and you chuckled to yourself when you heard her key turning in the lock. Of course, she was allowed to stay out past her curfew if she was with Jungkook. Silently she tiptoed to her room and opened the door, almost screaming in surprise when she saw you sitting on the bed.

“Y/N! I’m so sorry, I didn’t know that you were waiting.”

Lisa whispered and you could see her bad conscious reflecting in her face.

You knew now that you had to end this relationship. Not for your sake, but for Lisa’s. You hated to be a burden for her. After every date, Lisa spend every waking hour to make it up to you. She was exhausting herself while trying to balance her job, Jungkook and you.

“It’s fine.”

You reassured her for the millionth time, holding out your hand for her to take.

With a sad smile you pulled Lisa next to you on the bed and she looked at you worriedly like she was already suspecting what was going to happen.

Your gaze met hers and you felt your heart growing heavy. Her beautiful brown eyes pleaded you not to hurt her, but yet, you needed to.

“I can’t do this anymore.”

You breathed, letting your gaze fall to your lap.

“W-what do you mean?”

Lisa stammered shakily and you closed your eyes, wishing that you could teleport yourself away from this place when you opened them again.

But when you took in your surroundings again, you were still sitting in Lisa’s dimly lit room while her sniffling sounded from the side.

“You know what I mean. I’m tired of this hide and seek.”

You stated regretfully and Lisa started stuttering next to you, searching for the right words.

“Don’t do this, Y/N. I thought you loved me.”

She sobbed eventually and you looked at her again, causing the air being knocked out of your lungs when you saw Lisa’s tear-filled eyes.

“I do love you, Lisa. So much. But that’s why I need to let you go.”

You answered while wiping away a tear that rolled down Lisa’s cheek.

“No! If you love me, you will stay with me.”

Lisa almost yelled at you in desperation and you weren’t sure anymore, if you were strong enough to leave.

“Don’t be so stubborn. It’s better if I leave. Look at all those people that support Jungkook and you. You were made to date someone like him.”

You admitted reluctantly, but Lisa was having none of it. She cupped your face and forced you to look at her.

“Don’t say that, Y/N. I love you and only you. So I am meant to be with you.”

She said confidently and you could feel your resistance crumbling.

“Lisa... you could have it so much easier.”

You sighted, but Lisa immediately shook her head.

“I don’t want easy, I want you.”

She smiled while slowly moving her face closer to yours, waiting for you to push her away, but when you didn’t, she softly pressed her lips on yours.

When she pulled away, she rested her forehead on yours, stroking your cheeks with her thumbs.

“I know this is hard. And I hate that I have to put you through this. But please don’t ever leave me.”

Her voice sounded so broken that you could only agree and nod in response.

In relief, Lisa pressed another kiss on your lips before pulling you close and wrapping you into a tight embrace.

Against her management’s order, you stayed the night. Lisa didn’t want to let you go, so without further ado, you changed into one of Lisa’s oversized shirts and snuggled up in bed together. Your head was resting on Lisa’s chest, while she ran her fingers through your hair until you felt yourself drifting off to sleep. The last thing you remembered was Lisa kissing your head, before the world turned black around you.

Lisa heard your slow, steady breathing and knew that you were asleep. Finally, she could let the tears run freely that she had been holding back for weeks now. She covered her mouth with her hand to silence her sobs. The feeling of you slipping away gradually had been killing her and she had only been waiting for you to break up with her.

She had saved your relationship tonight, but Lisa knew that this wasn’t a permanent solution. You were bound to break again. But Lisa couldn’t lose you.

Carefully she slipped out from underneath you, making sure not to wake you. Quickly she grabbed her phone before tiptoeing to the living room.

She plopped down on the couch, taking a deep breath and thinking about whether she had made a rash decision. But no. The two of you had wasted enough time, trying to adapt to YG’s pace. Enough was enough. Therefore, Lisa opened the VLIVE App and started a livestream.

While the connection built, she could feel her heart almost jumping out of her chest in nervousness. Normally, she would ignore this feeling and put a fake smile on. But not today. Today she wanted to give her fans an insight into her real life.

“Hey guys.”

She greeted the already 10,000 viewers with a shaky voice once she went live.

“This livestream wasn’t planned, so bear with my rambling.”

Lisa chuckled, but when several ‘We love you’ messages appeared on her screen, she managed to calm down a bit.

“Stalling won’t make anything better, so I’m just going to tell it as it is. I’m in love with someone. But not with the person that you guys think. This person is in my life for over three years already but had to stay out of the spotlight. This person is really special to me and I can’t even start to describe my feelings.”

Lisa’s nervousness faded away when she thought about you and a smile played on her lips.

“She...”

Lisa broke off when she realized what she had just said and looked into the camera with wide eyes. But then she remembered that she could lose you forever if the two of you continued this hide and seek, so she exhaled shakily before continuing with determination.

“She is my soulmate and I wouldn’t be sitting here if it weren’t for her. I know this livestream will probably receive a lot of backlash, but I’m tired of hiding although I have done nothing wrong. I’m a role model to many young people and I want to apologize for not being honest in the past. But from now on, I don’t want to lie anymore. I want to show you that it’s ok to be yourself. Love is something beautiful and I will not let anyone tell me that it is something to be ashamed of. I...”

“Jagi?”

Your voice suddenly sounded from behind and Lisa could hear your steps nearing. A little later you appeared in the living room and Lisa made sure that the camera wasn’t showing you. You stood there with your hair disheveled in her shirt and Lisa knew that she had made the right decision. A wide smile decorated her face and she turned back to the camera again.

“Don’t let anybody tell you who to be or who to love, guys. I love all of you, always remember that. Good night!”

Lisa said before turning off the livestream and walking up to you.

“Oh my god, Lisa. Why didn’t you tell me that you were doing a VLIVE? Did they hear me?”

You asked panicked, but Lisa calmly took your hand and pulled you to the bedroom.

“Everything’ fine. Don’t worry.”

She smiled at you and you looked at her suspiciously.

“Are you sure?”

You dug deeper and Lisa nodded her head before laying down and letting you snuggle up to her.

“Why did you do a livestream at this hour?”

You suddenly wondered out loud, but Lisa didn’t want to worry you tonight.

She knew that you would disprove of her action, but it was the only way to stay by your side.

“I will tell you tomorrow. Rest now.”

Lisa whispered as she kissed the side of your head and you tightened your embrace in response.

“I love you.”

You mumbled already half asleep, causing Lisa’s heart to flutter.

“I love you too.”

She responded with a smile, knowing that she had done the right thing.

Feeling as free as never before, Lisa closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep in no time, ignoring what would come in the morning and savoring this moment instead.

“Lisa!!”

Jennie’s upset voice ripped you out of your sleep and you jolted awake. Sleepily you rubbed your eyes and saw that Jennie was standing in front of the bed with her phone in her hand, staring at her group member in shock.

When you looked at your girlfriend, you could see that a sheepish grin was forming on her lips.

“You know that you’re dead now, right?”

Jennie partly looked like she was joking, but a part of her also looked worried and you turned your gaze to Lisa to search for an answer.

“What did you do?”

A faint foreboding sat in the back of your mind and you prayed that you were wrong.

“I made our relationship public last night.”

Lisa stated nonchalantly and your mouth fell open in shock.

“You did what?”

You asked in disbelief, considering whether your girlfriend and Jennie were just pulling a prank on you.

“It’s all over the news already and YG has called a million times.”

Jisoo suddenly remarked as she was walking into the bedroom too, followed by Chaeyoung closely behind.

“Um... congrats for finally being free?”

The latter stammered with a lopsided grin and Lisa chuckled next to you.

“What if you get fired??”

You couldn’t understand how your girlfriend could be so calm right now and already started picturing the worst scenarios in your head.

“So be it.”

Lisa shrugged and you felt like fainting of excitement.

“Don’t worry, Y/N. Lisa is too valuable for YG.”

Jisoo tried to cheer you up, but she didn’t have much success.

Therefore, Lisa laid her hand on yours, making you look at her.

“Don’t worry, babe. I’ve thought about this. This was the only option for me. So I will accept the consequences, no matter what they might be.”

She looked confident in her decision, nevertheless, you wished that she wouldn’t have risked her career for you.

Suddenly the doorbell rang and all of you looked at each other knowingly. This could only be one of their managers.

Lisa flashed you one last encouraging smile before climbing off the bed to open the door.

You weren’t able to understand their words, but you heard that someone was talking agitatedly with your girlfriend and her members in the living room. A few minutes later, Lisa opened the door and sat beside you on the bed again.

“I’m sorry about this. But would you be willing to go to the company with me? YG wants to talk with us.”

She asked apologetically, while stroking a few strands of hair out of your face.

You gulped, not knowing what to expect, but nodded, nevertheless.

Together you got ready in a few minutes and sat in the car with the other members on your way to the YG headquarters a little later. You clasped Lisa’s hand tightly and she soothingly ran her thumb across the back of your hand.

There was a huge crowd of paparazzi in front of the YG building and you were glad that they sneaked you in through the back. Nevertheless, it seemed like everyone was staring at you and you wondered how Lisa managed to hold herself this strong. There wasn’t a sign of nervousness in her face and she held your hand confidently while strutting to the elevator that would bring you to the top management level of the building.

All of you walked straight to the CEO office where the executive board was sitting and staring at you sternly. Lisa squeezed your hand and you slid a little behind her.

“I’m guessing you know why you’re here?”

One of them asked and Lisa stepped forward a bit.

“Yes. It’s about me going public with my relationship.”

She stated calmly, while confidently holding eye contact with her opposites.

“Good that you at least seem to know that this should have been a topic discussed with us first. Do you even know what you have done? Don’t you have respect for your members? This will cause Blackpink’s image to be destroyed. You may never recover from this and we have to end your contracts. Did you even consider that this would not only have consequences for you alone?”

The manager’s voice became louder with every word until it even cracked in the end.

Finally, Lisa showed signs of nervousness too. Insecurely she looked to her feet, seeming to have only realized now that she had dragged her members into this too. Apologetically she glanced to them from the side, but they were all smiling at her.

Suddenly Jisoo took a few steps forward too.

“With all due respect, but I think you’re wrong.”

She spoke and you looked at her with wide eyes, because you weren’t used to her talking back.

“The comments during the VLIVE and now on Twitter and Instagram have mostly been positive. The hashtags ‘loveislove’ and ‘lisahwaiting’ have been trending in several countries and Lisa has gained several hundreds of new followers.”

Jisoo stated and you looked at Lisa in surprise. You hadn’t expected the news to be taken so well by the public.

Lisa looked equally taken aback and when you looked to the executives again, you could see that they were speechless as well.

“If the backlash had been your only concern, I think that Lisa has done nothing wrong and we have no further things to discuss?”

Chaeyoung suddenly asked, taking Lisa and you completely by surprise again.

All of this support was simply overwhelming.

Still being dumbfounded, the management ended the meeting by explaining that they had several things to discuss before they would come back to you. So together you made your way out of the room.

As soon as you had closed the door behind you, all of you looked at each other before starting to squeal and falling into each other’s arms. You had made it. Lisa suddenly grabbed your neck and pulled you against her body, kissing you passionately on your lips. When the door of the conference room opened again and revealed the executive board, you quickly pushed Lisa away in embarrassment. But she only laughed and interlaced your fingers while walking back to the car.

“Were the comments really mostly positive?”

Lisa asked once you were all on your way back to the dorm again and Jisoo nodded with a smile.

“Yeah, look.”

She pulled out her phone and showed you several memes that their fans had already made that were all showing support.

A wide grin spread on Lisa’s face and she laid her arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to her. She kissed the top of your head and you sighted in relief.

After three years you finally didn’t have to hide anymore.

“Let’s go grab some ice cream.”

Lisa suggested happily and no one in the car was opposed to that.

You looked at your girlfriend and her eyes were sparkling like never before.

A warm feelilng spread in your body and it felt like the two of you had finally made it through winter.

Together.

#blackpink scenario #blackpink #lalisa scenario #lalisa #girl group scenario #girl group #kpop scenario #kpop #girl group imagine #blackpink imagine

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angstsfordays · 4 years

Text

Tell Me Now

Summary: The best part about love is always that bit before you actually confessed your feelings and officially be together. That mutual pining and fluttering feeling. But that would not last forever. You got to tell that person someday before it’s too late.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader (Main pairing), Steve Rogers x Reader (Supporting pairing)

Warnings: LOTS OF FEELINGS. Maybe a few swear words? Mutual pining and much slow burn that will make your heart ache.

Word count: 10889

Notes: Thank you for supporting my story: Stay with Me and For You! If you haven’t check it out, be sure to do so! I’m back with a new post that has been in my drafts for a while. Since I’m finally on a break from school, I managed to continue working on it!

This time, I’m back with a Bucky story and it will be in the same universe as my two other posts. So for Bucky’s stories, Steve’s girl will be named Ro(salie). In Steve’s stories, Bucky’s girl will also have a name (undecided yet) otherwise it will just be weird like Reader 1 or 2. Just take note again that Ro (in this story) is an OC from my previous two related stories!

Hoping that this story can cheer everyone up in these difficult times. Take care and stay safe! Wear masks and practice social-distancing! Anyways, hope y’all enjoy this one too! IT’S REALLY LONG BUT I HOPE IT’S WORTH A READ. Let me know what you think! 😊

———————————————————————

“I imagined you would have plans on a Friday night.” You were still in a deep pile of work before the voice of your boss snapped you out of your concentration.

You could not hide the frown that formed on your face as you looked up to meet his face. “I wonder who decided it would be a good idea to have a crossfire in the Amazon forest.”

“Well, we can’t decide where the bad guys want to be? Plus, no people were hurt, we were well away from civilization.” Tony tried to downplay the aftermath of the previous mission. The team were intercepting the trafficking of dangerous weapon materials by a rogue organisation. Said organisation thought it would be escape unscathed and undetected through the biggest rainforest from Earth’s mightiest heroes.

“There were no people but there were tons of wildlife, Tony! Animal activists and nature conservationists are basically rioting! That’s two more to add to the list of people that are pissing at the Avengers!”

You retorted at your boss’ almost nonchalant attitude. You knew he was not surprised that the Avengers always received backlash even if they were only trying to save the world.

It was a long week for you, having to clear up this PR stunt caused by the Avengers. You have started working for Tony Stark as his new assistant for the past six months. With Pepper taking over Stark Industries as CEO, Tony Stark could solely focus on his Avenger duties.

However, even with Friday, he needed someone on the ground that could help him with matters that require human interactions. More specifically, to deal with the Public Relations side of the matter.

Needless to say, while people are grateful for the Avengers, there are some who weren’t. Mainly any government authorities who aren’t able to control the Avengers. Fame has two sides of the coin and Tony Stark hardly has time to juggle bad press and public relations on top of his Avenging duties.

You were recruited after you left your previous job, playing the whistle blower to your company whom you found out were involved in shady dealings linked to Hydra. You refused to defend them and save them with a PR campaign, thus you gathered all evidence and decided to throw them under the bus.

Life was hell for you after, you found yourself to be in danger courtesy of your previous employer. He decided to hire a Hydra agent to take your life and you were fearing for your life. You knew that you might not be able to convince the police to help you with this matter and you were sure that you would be dead.

But with whatever luck you had left, the attempt at your life was intervened by the one and only Avengers. You still remembered how your door was knocked down by Captain America and Black Widow decided to make an entrance through your window. What a dream, right?

You remembered shaking terribly as both Avengers fought off your terribly strong assassin. As you backed up to get away from the scene, your back collided into a hard chest. A cool, metal hand had held you close and your heart leap in fear. You turned back to see the Winter Soldier, as stone cold as you have known him from the news, his eyes held a reassuring stare that prevented you from screaming your lungs out.

You did not know what prompted your next actions but you threw yourself at him, arms encircling neck and hiding yourself in his warm embrace. You hoped that he could protect you. You did not want to die just yet, you believed you still had a lot of things to fulfill in life.

And that was basically the beginning of your new life. After being rescued, Tony recruited you into the Avengers though not as an Avenger. You wished, ha! Instead, you were hired as the PR director for the Avengers. Tony Stark was impressed with what you did previously with your previous company and decided to hire you to manage PR for the Avengers. God knows he would not want to deal with that.

It was also to make sure you were under protection with Earth’s Mightiest Heroes and that you did not need to worry about any attempts on your life. The agent and your previous employer were dealt with. You were in a much better place now.

“Come on kid, let me make you a drink.”

“I don’t think that it is appropriate in the workplace, boss.” You jested but you knew he mean well. Tony is a great boss despite his occasional oddities. He respected and trusted you, and that is all you really ask for in a boss.

“How about as a friend?” He shrugged off your previous comment before gesturing you to follow him to the exclusive lounge area for Avengers. This was entirely different because it was located in the private living quarters of Avenger members. All other personnel did not have access to it, even you until not long ago.

When you were first introduced to the team, you could not believe yourself to be in that situation. You became fast friends with the girls and it was Rosalie or Ro as she liked to be called (who’s also Steve Roger’s girlfriend) that made you feel at home with the team.

She was impressed at your bravery to stand up to injustice and made it a point to be your friend. She would sometimes ask you out for lunch or coffee, eventually inviting you to hang out with the rest of the girls.

All of them were so normal, unlike their fierce and badass images as Avengers. You could really see that they were just normal people with everyday problems. They have come to seek your advice on everyday stuff, such as dress for a party or planning a surprise for their significant other.

Then one day came the big question.

“Do you have anyone special, Y/N?” You crinkled your nose at Ro’s question and shook your head. You never thought about it since you have been busy with work.

You had only one serious boyfriend after college but you broke off the relationship when you realised that he was not the one for you. He wanted you to be the trophy wife in his life, proposing to you a couple of years after you started your career. He assured he will take care of you as he started climbing up the corporate ladder. He wanted to start a family but you knew you wanted more.

You wanted your own career and be part of something more meaningful and bigger than yourself. There was no way you wanted to be confined to a home taking care of children. Sure, you might hope for it in the future but you knew the potential that you had. You were not going it to give it up so easily.

“Never really thought about it.” You shrugged as you drank your iced coffee.

“Oh come on, Y/N. There are plenty of guys here in the compound, don’t tell me there isn’t one that caught your eye.” Your eyes widened at Ro’s words. While subtle, your body language did not slip past the keen eyes of Natasha Romanoff. There was one guy. Maybe. But you were not going to let them know.

“There isn’t any.” Your answer was curt before taking another sip of that coffee.

“You’re lying.” Natasha answered smoothly, if you were not close with her you would have stopped yourself from throwing daggers at her with your eyes.

“There isn’t-” You look to Wanda who was giggling at the exchange and your eyes widened at the possibility of-

“Wanda! Don’t you dare!” You warned the young girl as you knew what she was capable of. God forbid she read your mind and figure out whose image first popped in your mind. She threw her arms mockingly and gave an expression like she would not dare to so even while she had a wide grin on her face.

“Who is it?!” Ro started getting excited at the prospect of her friend having her crush.

“No one! Oh look at the time, I need to brief Tony about something-some meeting- something…BYE!” You hurriedly walked out of the pantry. You knew that the girls would hound you for answers and you were not ready to face that yet.

———————————————————————

“Earth to Y/N. Yoohoo!” The sound of Tony’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts once again and the incident with the girls that happened only yesterday.

“Wha- what?”

“I asked for your favourite poison?” Tony quipped before he started to open the cabinets for his liquors.

“Uh- surprise me with your best.” You tried to give a fast answer as you were just interrupted from your memory of yesterday. Tony threw a smirk over his shoulder before he went ahead to get some ice.

“Oooh, is Tony making drinks?” A new voice appears and you turned to see Ro entering the lounge. Behind her were the rest of the Avengers who were slowly filing into the room.

“Be prepared for an amazing show.” Tony started to wave his hands like a showman. He closed the cocktail shakers and started doing an awkward dance to a song that he requested Friday to play. It was overall cheesy and greasy, unlike his usual public image.

You started laughing and clapping to cheer him on. There was some holler in the background and Tony finally poured his concoction into a fancy glass. Adding in a small umbrella, he presented it to you. You turned to the rest of the team to show it off before taking a sip.

“It’s called ‘I cannot live without you’ because we cannot live without you now, Y/N.” Tony did a dramatic wave his hands before bowing. You chuckled at his theatrics before downing your drink.

“On behalf of the team, we’re sorry that you have to clean up our shit.” Tony exclaimed to which everyone snorted but agreed. They knew they owe you big for clearing the PR mess after every time they had to do their job of saving the world.

Natasha and Wanda decided to join Tony behind the bar and make some drinks for everyone as well. Everyone took a seat around the lounge table near the island and Ro took the seat beside yours.

“You worked hard, Y/N. Thank you.” She went in to hug you from the side.

“Anything for you, baby.” You petted her like she was your child.

“Thanks again, Y/N.” Steve (you could never get over the fact that you were on first name basis with Captain America) chimed in. You responded with a salute and spoke.

“Just doing my job, Steve.” The rest all started sitting down one by one with drinks passed out. Everyone fell into easy conversation.

A flash of blue passed by your eyes and you saw Bucky Barnes taking the sit across you. He was dressed in a long-sleeved blue Henley with dark pants. He just had his hair cut short and you could not help to leave a small gasp when he turned to meet your eyes.

You immediately swerved to face Ro who was talking to Steve. Seeing that she was busy in conversation, you turned your head to the other side to meet Natasha who was giving you a confused expression at your flustered one.

Your hand reached out to your drink to get another sip, unknowingly Bucky’s own fingers brushed against yours to reach out for his drink on the same table. Your eyes immediately averted to scan his reaction and he gave you a curt polite smile. You tried to muster a response, any really to show that you were cool-headed.

Bucky threw in another nod as he raised his drink and you nodded in response to his gesture, his mannerisms threw you off guard. In your almost entire year of working with the Avengers, you barely had a solid interaction with the Winter Soldier.

By that, you mean that the most interaction you had was a nod in the hallway, a greeting in the morning when you passed by the gym on the way to your office or when he saw you getting off work in the evening. There also was the occasion asking of refills for coffee when you see him in the pantry. And that was it.

Your first meeting with Bucky had left a big impact on you because for the first time you had felt an indescribable emotion that only he had on you. You had always had a strong independent spirit and never felt the need to depend on someone. That was how you were raised in your household and your parents had pushed for you to exceed in life, given that you were from a second-generation immigrant family.

That kind of mentality had been ingrained into your life and you never let your guard down with people. Not until that fateful day…. for the first time you just wanted someone to depend on. But no matter, Bucky Barnes is out of your league, you reminded yourself.

You have seen how the gaze of female agents or staff move over to him whenever he stepped into the room. He did not even need to try, which was even the more annoying part.

Snap out of it, Y/N.

“Hey Y/N, you would not have gotten sick of us, yet right?” Sam quipped up in the conversation. You did not know what the context of the current conversation was but you just decided to answer away.

“Hmm, I don’t know. Is a drink really going to make me stay?” You shook your empty glass and Wanda initiated to refill it.

“Well then ask away, my dearest and indispensable employee. What would you like as an early bonus?” You jokingly made a serious face and looked like you were pondering hard on the question. Nothing really came into mind as you were happy with what you had for the moment.

“Maybe a vacation?” Natasha suggested with her brows raised. You nodded with a thoughtful expression, that would indeed be nice. Would you go to the beach or the mountains for a nice personal retreat?

“That’s too simple. You should use Stark’s card to the fullest advantage.” Sam said smugly and you returned with an expression that showed agreement.

“How about a boyfriend?” Ro’s voice suddenly injected into the conversation. You swerved your head to face her, eyes widened at her bold suggestion.

“Oh, what’s this all about?” You could already imagine the gears spinning in your boss’ head and you really wanted to strangle Ro for a quick minute.

“Y/N deserves someone special in her life, you have been overworking her too hard Tony.” Ro continued with a playful expression and you swore you were going to lean over and-

“Get some, get some!” Sam started cheering to which Ro joined. The both of them acting like children.

“I don’t understand, what is Miss Y/N getting?” Vision suddenly asked in the midst and you saw Wanda giggling with an embarrassed expression at her boyfriend’s innocence.

“Stop it, Rosalie! You know I don’t like to talk about this!” You gave a fair warning to the hyped-up Avenger whom Steve almost seemed embarrassed of as he sighed at his girlfriend’s antics.

“Hey! You know I don’t like it people call me Rosalie!” Ro retorted as she folded her arms.

“Well, you crossed the line first.” You threw back a squinted glare.

“Oh come on, I just want you to find someone that can make you happy because you make us happy.” Ro started walking towards you with her hands outstretched, wanting to give you a hug.

“Uh-uh, you don’t get to be all cute on me after what you did. Steve might fall for it but I won’t.” You held up an accusing finger to which Ro pouted.

“Steve, she is so mean to me.” The girl started pouting and went to sit on Steve’s lap, hugging him like a teddy bear. Steve returned the embrace but not before looking up to you and mouthed to you ‘sorry’.

You knew Ro meant well like a sister but you REFUSED to speak of your non-existent love life in front of everyone (well specifically HIM).

“Oh come on, Y/N. Ro just wanted the best for you. It’s important to work hard but one must play hard” Sam added on with a smirk to which you threw him a glance that hinted for him to zip it.

“You sure there is no one you’re interested? I happen to be a great matchmaker myself on top of being a billionaire, playboy wait scratch that I married with a kid, philanthropist…” Tony gestured to himself smugly.

“How about no Tony, I am not going to be one of your special projects.” You waved your boss-friend off before running your hands through your hair, exasperated at what tonight’s conversation started leading to.

“Oh come on, there are plenty of men in the compound. Take your pick, any pick. I will set you up.” Tony insisted and made a gesture to actually pull up a holographic database of all personnel data.

“Oh my god Tony. Believe it or not, I don’t need your help and I am not confident about YOUR taste in men.” You gasped in shock at what he was doing and wanted to squirm into the corner of the couch that you were sitting on.

“Well then, I am sure you will be confident in my taste.” Natasha’s voice pulled you out of your recluse and you returned a disbelieved look towards the redhead.

Your eyes averted once more to the beautiful brunette in blue across you to gauge his reaction to all this sudden intervention. Bucky looked aloof and amused altogether, he had his usual calm demeanour but you could make out the small upward curve of his lips. What was he really thinking about, you wondered.

“Argh fine. If I let you have your way, can we stop having this conversation that I never needed.” You issued an ultimatum to the group; you just wanted this conversation to end.

“Deal.” Natasha answered while Ro nodded eagerly from your side.

“Fine, If there is someone nice, you can introduce him to me.” You threw your hands up in defeat before crossing them over your chest, signalling to the team that you are so done with this ordeal.

“Yay!” Ro got off Steve’s lap and started doing a celebratory dance by swing her hands in circles. Everyone’s attention went to her and her little dance was met with amusement. You could not help but to laugh at her excitement, your eyes suddenly caught the sight across you.

Bucky Barnes suddenly had a hardened expression on his face unlike before and his eyes stared right into your soul (as cheesy as it sounds). It suddenly threw you off guard because this was probably the most intimate interaction you had with each other and you immediately tried looking everywhere but him.

“Please promise he won’t be weird.” You turned to your redhead friend and requested with a pout. Her eyes fleeted somewhere else before meeting yours.

“Trust me, Y/N. Believe it or not, I am a psychic when it comes to this sort of things.” You definitely had faith in your friend, I mean she would never sabotage you. Right?

———————————————————————

You return to work on Monday well rested. You manage to give yourself a personal retreat over the weekend by visiting cafes and bookstores. You even baked some Nutella tarts on Sunday and planned to give it to the team to share.

As you stepped into your office to put your things down, Friday requested you to head down to laboratory. You gave yourself one last look in the reflection of your glass office, straightening your tan midi pencil skirt and light blue blouse. You took your Stark Pad and place the earpiece on your left ear.

You were ready to face whatever work would bring. You took light confident steps to the level that the laboratory was on. Walking in to the open lab space, you saw Tony and Bruce exchanging playful banter, well more so on Tony’s side.

The two men’s attention turned to you once you stepped into the room and you were welcomed with smiles.

“What’s up, boss?” Your eyes went to Tony before going to Bruce. “Morning, Bruce.”

The scientist returned your greeting with a warm smile before walking back to his workstation. Tony signalled for you to follow him as he started pulling up holographic images and was looking through some data information. “So how’s your morning?”

“Good. Friday said you wanted to see me. What do you need me to do?” Your statement made Tony rolled his eyes as he made a jokingly exasperated expression.

“Diving into work talk so early at 10? Relax Y/N.”

“Some people actually start work earlier, Mr Stark and I’m not paid to relax.” You knew Tony was unlike any boss, he definitely had his quirks but it was not something you could not work with.

“You almost sound like Cap for a second there, how did I get such an employee like you?” Tony almost looked thrown off for a moment but you knew it was in jest.

“You offered me a job after saving my ass from an assassination attempt on my life.” Your deadpanned expression drew a laugh from your boss. He held up his hands before resting one on his hip.

“You never fail to surprise me Y/N. Anyways, okay onto business, we have a visitor and I need you to show him around.”

“Alright? Who is it?” Looking up to your boss with curious eyes, you were surprised when he let out a sigh- as if he were actually concerned about the matter.

“The government is sending in an agent to check in on the Avengers for a yearly assessment. It is part of our compliance to be transparent with what we actually do. Of course, we do not divulge mission information and all that. But they do want to know how we run operations on a general basis.”

“And you chose me because….” Your brows furrowed at the sudden revelation of information.

“You are the perfect person for the job. You know exactly what and what not to show them without infringing on our privacy.” Tony answered nonchalantly while instructing Friday to work on some scientific analysis.

“Right, of course. I’m the PR girl.” You answered with a knowing expression.

“No, you’re now my trusted adviser and there is no one else I trust with the task.” Tony looked up to meet your eyes with a serious expression for a short moment.

“Adviser? I’m just in charge of PR.” Placing your free hand on your hip, you made an exasperated stance as you gave Tony a questionable look.

“Oh well, would you look at that? You’ve been promoted. Congratulations, that will be your bonus for handling the Amazon stunt.” Tony started clapping to himself before making a grand hand gesture.

“Seriously, Tony? That’s like my job, it does not call for a promotion.” Your brows quirked and you had to give him a ‘I’m not buying this’ expression.

“Well, I’m the boss. I’m right, you’re wrong and thus I can promote you.” He gave you an all-knowing expression before he suddenly had a look that said he was reminded of something. “He will be here in 1 hour.”

“You are giving me 1 hour to prepare? Oh my god, Tony. That’s too little time!” You started stomping in your heels before frantically looking to your Stark Pad and asking Friday to send you information on your soon to come visitor.

“You can make it work; you always do.” Tony gave you a thumbs up with an eat-shitting grin. You could not even return him a verbal response and let out a short grunt before making your way out of the lab.

“I am experienced enough to do this. I am capable enough to do this. I can do this” Chanting a mantra to calm your nerves, you started preparing information on your Stark Pad to come up with an agenda to welcome the government agent.

You were definitely going to request for a vacation soon after this.

Walking to the lobby at 10.45 am, you stood by the receptionist desk as you waited for your visitor. You chatted with the receptionist, Jenny briefly to calm your nerves. She was a sweet-looking lady in her early 40s who was a single mother of two boys. However, her appearance was just a façade as you knew her to be tough and hard worker who was great at her job.

You once witnessed her putting a rude government employee who was here to accompany a higher up in meeting with you boss. She took no shit from the man who looked down on her for being a ‘front desk lady’ and asked her to get coffee.

That moment never failed to make you feel good about being a woman.

Looking down at your Stark Pad, you read through the profile of your visitor. Keith Wellings. Age 45. A federal agent with the US government for almost 20 years. This man rose the ranks quick to his connections and tenacity to mix with the right people at the right time. He is definitely going to use this opportunity to curry favour both sides.

He will definitely make it hard to pass assessment in exchange for favours from your side. Keith will definitely be careful on how he presents this assessment to his bosses as he definitely knows the government will go to any lengths to get dirt on the Avengers. He will be on the offensive on this visit. You need to make sure he does not cross any line.

You could hear the footsteps before you saw someone walking through the door. To your surprise, the man entering through the door does not look like the one in your tablet.

He had a sense of familiarity around but where had you seen him before?

“Y/N Y/L/N! How has fate brought us together again?” His voice ringed an alert in your memory and you took an intake of air to calm yourself. There was no way it could be….

“Teddy Radnor?” Your voice was soft but you knew he could hear you. This was evident in how his face lit up at your recognition of him.

“It’s great to see you again.” You did not anticipate the hug that was coming for you and almost dropped your tablet as he pulled you in for one.

Teddy Radnor was your college friend. You both were studying the same major and became fair friends. You saved him from getting humiliated at a party by agreeing to be his ‘hot’ date as part of his frat house orientation. You were from the sister sorority which you only agreed to join as it was free housing on campus.

Teddy was a bit of a dork back in the college years and he was only in the fraternity because his family were legacies. You still thought he was a nice and sweet guy, albeit he started being clingy seeing that you were the only person who was genuinely nice to him. You did see him as a friend and brother though you knew he saw you otherwise.

While you did attract some attention from guys, you were focused on your studies. Teddy made sure to be the buffer and saw himself as your unofficial boyfriend. You tried on many occasions to give him the hint and ultimately told him the truth. He seemed to accept it but he believed that he could stand a chance one day in the future.

You lost touch with him upon graduation. You were busy in your career and you heard that he was busy advancing in his too. You just never thought you would be reunited after five years later under such circumstances.

“Wow, you’re working with the Avengers? That’s so awesome.” Those were his first words as he released you from the hug.

“Yeah, I switched job. And you’re working with the government? Wow.” You tried to match his enthusiasm.

“Yes-yes, not easy but I figured if I worked hard enough, I would be able to work in a place of importance.” Teddy’s words reminded you of why you were friends with him in the first place. Even while he’s sometimes awkward and couldn’t take a hint on your unrequited feelings for him, you knew he was a good person.

“I’m proud of you Teddy. I know you always wanted to work in public affairs.”

“Well, I could say the same for you. You’re working with the Avengers. I can’t believe I’m also here. Keith had another work thing so I was called in at the last minute to replace him.” You nodded in understanding. So that’s why Teddy was here.

Lady luck had to be on your side. You knew Teddy and Teddy definitely would not make it hard for you. This assessment would be a breeze.

———————————————————————

You gave Teddy a walk through of the entire compound, from the back end communications to the training grounds. He looked like a child at a playground with a piece of candy. You were sure he would give you the benefit of a good assessment.

You had lunch with him in the cafeteria and was ready to seal the deal when you heard him mention one important thing. “I know it sounds unprofessional of me but between friends, I want to let you know that I’m secretly a huge Avengers fan. I was stoked when I got the call to come in.”

“Oh yeah, who’s your favourite?” You tried asking casually, trying to hide the fact that you had a plan up your sleeve.

“Oh my gosh, they are all amazing. They truly are, but it has to be Cap for me. He really is the cream of the crop for me.” Nodding deviously, you already had a feeling that Teddy’s idol had to be Steve. Teddy was the history buff back in college.

“Of course, I understand Teddy. Well, it just so happens that I am acquainted with Cap and I could introduce you to him.” You gave your most award-winning smile to hook him in. Teddy looked at you for a moment before speaking. “Oh I see what you’re doing.”

You tried to conceal your expressions and gave him a confused frown at his words. Shit, was he catching up? “You’re trying to butter me up.” Shit, he did. Teddy continued on talking.

“And it’s working slightly but I still have to be impartial about this assessment, Y/N.” You heaved a small sigh of relief before smiling sweetly up at him again. “Oh come on, Teddy. I am just doing this for an old friend.”

“Old friend, right….” It was meant to be a mutter to himself but you could hear it loud and clear. You tried to brush it aside as you asked him if he was done with lunch. The two of you cleared your plates before continuing the walk through.

You brought Teddy to one of the lower levels and stopped in front of the door. You did not have to do anything as Friday recognised your presence and went ahead to open the door for you. Teddy turned to look at you in amazement once more while you returned a smug look in return at his response.

The two of you were brought to the sight of an Avengers-only training exercise. Saving the best for last, you peeked at Teddy’s response and had to bite your lip from forming a full-on grin.

Hook, line, sinker.

———————————————————————

Bucky Barnes had to focus. Steve had come up with a new training regime for field operations after reviewing past mission scenarios.

Playing to each member’s strength, Steve came up with offensive and defensive pairings for field combat. He was paired with Ro in the exercise, she was on defence while he was offense. While Ro had firepower with the nature of her powers, Steve decided she suited long range attacks with her ability to fly and that she can direct her powers from a further distance.

The duality of her flame like energy blasts was able to incinerate and tranquilize made her perfect to defend the team from attacks. Bucky on the other hand, more experienced in operative work will be the one to sneak into enemy lines and obtain the necessary data or item of interest.

In this particular scenario, Ro had to build an energy -based force field to defend the both of them from raining firepower. The rest of the team collectively tried to break the barrier while Ro had to endure it and bring Bucky into the ‘enemy base’.

Bucky looked over to see Ro enduring attacks from both Vision and Natasha. Steve was overseeing the practice while Sam took the side-lines to help Steve with the analysis of the training practice.

Bucky focused on defeating the holographic images that Wanda was conjuring to mimic potential enemies. Bucky’s ears suddenly perked up at the sound of new arrival into the training room.

Looking up, he saw you with an unknown man who seemed like he was in awe of everything. Bucky broke concentration for a moment and felt himself being punched in the jaw by one of the holographic enemies.

“Bucky, why are you not focusing-” Steve’s words were interrupted as he too looked up at the presence of new arrival into the room.

“Alright, we can take a break. Buck, Ro, the both of you were doing great. It was the right decision to pair you two together. We can resume again later.” Steve’s approval was all he needed for him to let loose and catch a breath.

Reeling away from Captain mode, Steve immediately switched to boyfriend mode. He went ahead to grab the water bottle and towel before making his way to his girlfriend. As Ro immediately gulped down the water, Steve lovingly wiped up the sweat on her face and placed a peck on the side of her temple. Bucky could hear him whispering ‘You did so good, darling’.

Ro gushed outwardly at Steve’s words by muffling her squealing into the towel. Steve chuckled at how she can still be blushing like a schoolgirl even when it was a year into their relationship. Bucky started to feel envious because he also wanted that relationship with someone too. Perhaps with someone who just entered the room.

The mysterious man and you started making way down the steps to the training grounds. Bucky gave the guy a once over, he looked decent enough but he didn’t like the way he was standing so close to you.

“Steve, I would like for you to meet someone. This is Teddy Radnor, he’s an agent from the government and is in charge of the assessment today.” You finally revealed who and where the guy was from.

“Captain Rogers, it is an honour to meet you. It’s an honour to meet everyone here, really.” This Teddy fellow stepped ahead to give Steve a handshake. Steve, putting on his public persona greeted the guy with a courteous smile.

“Likewise Agent Radnor. I hope you had a good experience.”

“Oh definitely. Y/N here has been a great host.” Agent Radnor placed his hands around your shoulder as he responded. You looked slightly taken aback by the sudden contact which made Bucky felt defensive all of a sudden.

As he was standing nearest to you, he though of taking a step forward to intervene when you turned to smile at Agent Radnor, looking embarrassed. What was going on-

Steve must have sensed the same thing he had because he asked what exactly Bucky had on his mind. “You two know each other?”

“Yes, we were college friends and in the same fraternity-sorority house.” Agent Radnor was quick to answer eagerly as he looked to you for affirmation. You just silently nodded in agreement.

“Oooh, college friends. Were you two close?” Ro started to join in the conversation as she stood beside Steve.

“Yes, yes indeed. In fact, I kind of confessed to her but she told me no. She did not see that way and wanted to focus on her studies which I respected that.” Agent Radnor seemed very pleased with his answer when it garnered intriguing responses from the rest of the team.

Bucky already started to dislike him.

“Teddy!” You were shocked at his sudden revelation and looked like you wanted to crawl into a hole as you brought up the Stark Pad to hide your face. You had a grimaced expression formed on your face after removing the tablet from your face. Your frown then turned into an irritated expression causing Bucky to follow your line of sight to find out what was the cause of it.

Bucky turned to see the girls namely Ro, Natasha and Wanda exchanging hush whispers with Cheshire grins on their face. Steve, Sam, and Vision did not know how to react in this circumstance and looked at each other awkwardly. Bucky did not like this man one bit.

“I’m sorry. Too much information. I always tend to be socially awkward when I’m nervous. I babble and say awkward stuff. I guess it’s because I’m just such a big fan of everyone. Oh wait, too much information again. I’m an agent and should be impartial during this assessment-” Agent Radnor started blabbering on and on, it was almost uncomfortable to endure.

You placed a comforting touch on his arm and tried to calm him down. ‘It’s alright Teddy, they’re just normal people like you and I.’ Bucky heard you say to him.

Even if Agent Radnor had embarrassed you before, you still offered him reassurance. That was one of the many things Bucky admired you, how effortless you were with people and the comforting presence you brought when you were in the room.

Bucky knew this was why you were so good at your job and that Tony Stark trusted whole-heartedly to place the well-being of the Avengers as your highest priority. He admired how level-headed you were no matter the crisis and the positivity that you had in ensuring that it will be dealt with.

More importantly, Bucky admired how you were genuine around the team. He was not sure when Tony recruited you after saving your life from Hydra. He was amazed at your bravery to stand up to injustice even if you did not any hero like powers. He was not sure how you would be like with the team, he preferred to keep you at a distance as with any strangers.

However, you started gaining fast friendships with everyone with your easy-going personality soon enough. He could see similarities between you and Ro in how you are friendly towards others but he could also see the difference. While Ro had an infectious and bubbly energy, you on the other hand draw people in with your cool and calming presence.

Bucky always wanted to get closer to you. He just didn’t know how to. Whenever he sees you, it was as if everything in him stilled and he could not express how he really felt. He only resorted to making sure he acknowledges your presence when in the same room, this was his way of him respecting you.

Bucky was not sure how else to approach you without making a fool of himself. He envied how the rest of the team were easy to warm up to you and he wished he could do the same too. But Bucky knew he didn’t deserve someone like you. Perhaps with his past, he does not deserve to be loved by someone at all.

Agent Radnor continued to have small talk with the rest of the team while Bucky looked on silently. You were looking on the exchange with interest without saying anything. You provided smiles of reassurance to Teddy as he spoke animatedly of his admiration for the Avengers.

Your eyes suddenly met his. Blood started rushing to his cheeks as he tried his best to maintain eye contact with you. This was the most imitate way that he could have with you without actually having to talk to you. God knows what nonsense would come out of his mouth if he actually tried to have a full-length conversation with you. How you render him speechless was beyond him.

Bucky could sense that you were getting nervous, your started blinking and your eyes were fleeting. Was it too much? Did he overdo it? Bucky saw you tucking a hair behind your ear before sending him a small smile his way.

While subtle, your smile made his breath hitched. Bucky then remembered to return the same gesture and the corner of his lips went up when he saw you trying to hold back a full smile while looking on the ground.

He wished he could have seen your full smile but he was sure you did not want to attract attention from the rest. What Bucky didn’t realise was that three devious women were observing this subtle exchange between you and him. The three women let out silent gasps as their theory was confirmed.

They always thought that they were imagining it because Bucky Barnes was always trying to mask his emotions around you while you tried your hardest to do the same. Wanda had her theory first before Natasha caught on immediately. Ro was the last but boy oh boy, when she knew, she was the most excited to bring this pairing to life.

Ro glanced over to Wanda and gave her the signal by rubbing the bridge of her nose. With a wave of her hands, Wanda caused one of the nearby pipes to burst and hot air started gushing, creating a high-pitched scream.

The sound took everyone off guard and Bucky went ahead to take you into his arms when he first heard the loud burst. You immediately returned the gesture and allowed yourself to stay in the protection of his arms.

When the realization of what happened dawned upon everyone, everyone let go of their ears to turn and check on each other.

Teddy was huddled and squatting down on the floor while most of the team squirmed slightly at the outburst, given that they were more used to loud sudden noises during field operations.

You opened your eyes and your heart started to race wildly as you found yourself in close proximity of Bucky. The previous time you were so close was during the first time when you two met and he saved your life.

“You alright, doll?” Did he just called you doll? You were hearing correctly right? Bucky chided himself as he realised what he had said. Who was he to call you doll? You may not even like the name!

“I’m alright, Bucky.” Bucky’s hands were still around your shoulders.

“Thank you.” You continued and it seemed like Bucky was suddenly snapped out of a trance. He let go of you immediately and you tried to adjust yourself, looking at the ground as you couldn’t meet his eyes.

Your exchange was not missed by Teddy who got back on his feet.

“Oops, better call maintenance.” Ro suddenly chimed in. Oops? Bucky’s brows frowned as he found Ro’s words to be weird in this situation. He looked to see Ro exchanging glances with Wanda but could not put together what was going on.

What were those girls up to?

———————————————————————

“Well, I hope you will give us a good assessment. We really are just folks trying our best to help the world.” Steve sealed the deal as he tried ending Teddy’s experience on a good note.

“Of course, Captain. I am well aware.” Teddy gave a salute to Steve to which Steve returned awkwardly with matching enthusiasm. Teddy gave the rest an acknowledging nod and you gestured for him to leave. You suggested for him to return to a private space for you to wrap up the day.

As Teddy walked up the stairs, you quickly turned back to the rest of the team and gave Steve a thumbs up. The team gave silent holler and cheers as a sign of support and you gave a reassuring expression in response. They knew you had it in the bag.

You led Teddy to one of the small meeting rooms on the office level and discussed over how the assessment will conclude. Teddy had noted down his remarks in a government issued smart tablet of his own and he informed you that he would have to come up with a more comprehensive report for submission.

You understood and thanked him for his time. As you walked Teddy out to the lobby, you continued to make small talk and caught up on what you missed in each other’s lives for the past six years.

“Well, this has been fun.” Teddy turned to face you.

“Indeed, not trying to influence you using the friend card but I really hope you can give us a fair chance on this assessment. The Avengers may look glamourous with their hero-act but there’s a lot of work that goes on behind the scene. It’s really a lot of work and sacrifice on their part, putting their lives at risk so that they can make sure those who are not able to defend themselves are given the chance to live.” You tried to conclude the assessment on a positive and sincere note.

“Spoken like a true PR representative.” Teddy spoke as he chuckled.

“No. I’m speaking as someone who really truly witnessed it first-hand.” You hoped that Teddy could hear the sincerity in your voice and know that you were speaking from your heart. Teddy was not able to find the words to respond so he just nodded in understanding.

“Well, you will hear from us in a week.”

“I look forward to it.” You gave your most heartfelt smile. You initiated to say goodbye to Teddy first, wishing him the best in his work. He returned the same gesture and he started walking off.

As you saw him leaving out the door, you turned back to head to your office after a long day. Your name was suddenly called and you could see Teddy re-entering the building again to walk up to you.

“What is it, Teddy?” You were curious to know why Teddy had returned barely after he left. Looking over, you could see Teddy nervously rubbing his hands together and cracking his knuckles. You knew this was his tell sign of nervousness back in college. Guess he still had the same habit.

“Hey, Teddy. What’s wrong?” You tried to reassure him, hoping to calm his nerves with a supporting tone of voice.

“I was- I wanted-” You kept quiet to indicate for him to continue his sentence. Teddy looked at you straight in the eyes before he spoke.

“Y/N, I was hoping after this is over, we could have dinner together. To catch up again. Would that be alright?”

“Oh Teddy…. I’m not too sure, would that be alright-” You were starting to panic. Was he suggesting this so that…

“This is not some sort of exchange in any way and it would not affect the results of the assessment.” Heaving a sigh of relief, you looked up to meet Teddy’s eyes. It was déjà vu all over again, this was exactly how he looked like when he confessed to you back in college.

“I’m not too sure Teddy-”

“Please. Would you like to give me one more chance? To prove that maybe it can work out between us. I really really like you, Y/N. I still can’t forget about you after all these years….” You wished so hard to not be in this position again.

You weren’t sure if you wanted to agree to this, knowing that you maybe had feelings for someone else. Even if it was impossible between you and said someone.

But you couldn’t lead Teddy on when you know your heart isn’t fully in on this.

“I would let you know again. Maybe once this is over?” You tried to give a neutral answer, one that didn’t give him too much hope but also not a crushing answer. Well, it seemed to please Teddy as he had a wide grin on his face when he heard your answer.

“Alright, sure. Yeah. Should I get your number?” He suggested with his grin still full-on.

“Well, I have yours. Stark Technology and all-” You pointed to your tablet and he just nodded in understanding.

“Great, well I hope to hear from you soon. With good news.” Now it was your turn to nod and Teddy took it upon himself to bid you goodbye with a hug. You returned it and then send him off.

Releasing a big sigh out of your body, you were glad that the day was really over.

It was soon evening and it was time for you to end work. You were packing up your stuff when Friday informed you that you were wanted in the Avengers’ private quarters.

Wondering what it could be about, you swiftly made your way there. You were then greeted with the sight of Wanda and Bucky making dinner while everyone was waiting at the table.

“Y/N!” You first hear Ro’s voice before you even entered the room. The rest followed in their greetings. The smell of food immediately drew you to heading over to where the chefs were.

“Food smells so good.” Taking a deep inhale, the smell of home cook food was starting to make you growl with hunger.

“Perfect, cause it’s for you.” Natasha remarked as she was helping to set the table.

“For me?” You asked excitedly as you placed your things down and went ahead to stand beside Wanda as she was stirring something in a pot.

“Tony had to go home to take care of Morgan but he told us what you did for us today.” Natasha continued saying.

“It was nothing. Just part of my job.” You tried waving it off casually as Wanda offered you a taste test of the soup she made. You gave her a look like you were in love as the soup tasted so so good.

“Bucky is making your favourite. Mac and cheese.” You could die on the spot as mac and cheese was your ultimate comfort food. You peeked out behind Wanda’s silhouette to look at Bucky earnestly topping different layers of cheese on the macaroni.

You bit your lip, debating privately on which sight was more delicious? Stop it, Y/N. You chided yourself. This was highly inappropriate. Bucky looked up from his cooking to meet your gaze and you decided to give him an appreciative smile. “Thank you. That’s so sweet of you.

“It’s nothing.” His voice was low and muffled and sexy, oh my god, you needed to control yourself. Bucky’s entire being was doing things to your insides.

Soon, dinner was ready to be served and everyone gathered around the communal table. Everyone started digging in and fell into conversation immediately. As everyone was having second rounds, Natasha who was sitting across you spoke up.

“So how do you think the assessment went?” Natasha asked you with a curious gleam in her eye, as if she was expecting something.

“It was good, I think we can expect good results. Teddy really seemed impressed by what we have here.” Your friends nodded as they listened to your answer.

“Or more specifically, he’s impressed by what we have here.” Ro looked at you with an all-knowing grin.

“Ro! Teddy and I are old friends but college besides that would have been entirely inappropriate. He’s here to do his job.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time someone mixed work and pleasure.” Sam sent you a smug look as he wriggled his eyebrows. You scoffed at what he was insinuating and shook your head while reaching out for a glass of water.

“So?” Natasha drawled out the word as she asked. You made a frowning-confused face and tilted your head to signal for her to continue. “That’s it?”

You knew exactly where she was steering to in the conversation and you could back out of it, but you knew she will stop at nothing to get answers out of someone. Placing down your cup, you let out an exhale as you held onto your temple as if you had a headache.

“Teddy asked me out.” You weren’t surprised when your friends let out gasps at your revelation. Well more so on the girls and perhaps Sam. Vision, Steve and Bucky had neutral expressions worn on their faces.

“Please, are you really surprise?” Your eyes averted to the girls who seemed more excited at what you had just revealed.

“I’m surprise he got the balls even. He might have gained some respect from me.” Natasha coolly remarked as she took another bite of her food. Such savagery….

“Hey, Teddy is not so bad!” You protested.

“You gained a soft spot for him?” Natasha calmly quipped back.

“Come on, I’ve been friends with him throughout college. He is odd at times but he’s harmless.”

“Like a Teddy bear?” Sam chimed in. His words gained many laughter and he even tried giving high-fives to show off his wit.

“I’m not going to talk to you people if you’re going on like this!” You threatened to back out of the room. Pulling your chair out, you started to clean your own dish and you could hear the rest of the group continued on their chatter. You could hear Steve reprimanding the rest like a disappointed parent at his kids’ behaviour.

Bless Steve.

As you returned to the table, Natasha spoke up again. “So are you going to say yes to the date?” You knew everyone could sense your hesitation and your eyes went to Bucky who had a passive expression on his face. Oh god….

“I don’t know, Nat.”

“What do you mean know?” Ro continued. “He’s not expecting you to go on a date to get a better assessment, is he? If not, I WILL-” Ro went on to mimic a punching gesture with both hands and Steve had to calm her by pressing down on both her hands.

“Yo Y/N. That won’t be cool, I’mma also-” Sam went on to make his own gesture of beating Teddy to a pulp. Steve once shook his head at the immaturity of his friends but he held a serious look as he turned to you. He was indeed worried if it was really the case.

“No-no, Teddy wouldn’t. He said it’s not like that. He just wants to reconnect.” You tried to calm your two rather rash (but loyal) friends.

“Do you want to?” This time Wanda was the one who spoke up. Taking a moment to seriously think about it, you figured what was the harm on going on one date with Teddy? Would it really be that bad? If you don’t feel the same way, you could always settle it there and then.

Why were you denying yourself at a chance at love again? You figured it you could start dating again. “Maybe. I don’t know. I should try, should I? It’s been awhile….”

“Listen to your heart, sweetie.” Wanda reached out to hold your hand dearly. You smile gratefully at her support.

“I will think about it, anyways I told him I will give him an answer once this is over. So I still have time.” You said to reassure your friends. You tried redirecting the conversation away from this topic and continued to spend a little more time with your friends.

Bucky Barnes tried his hardest all evening to not falter. Hearing that agent had asked you out stirred up some emotions within him. He realised you were not going to be available forever. An amazing woman like you will catch the eyes of other and eventually they will make a move to ask you out.

Bucky caught Steve glancing over at him. Even without talking, he knew what his friend was trying to tell him. Go for her before you lose your chance, punk! Steve while terrible with dealing with women except for his own girlfriend was not stupid. He was still able to read the room and more importantly, his childhood friend.

Steve always had his suspicions. He noticed how Bucky’s eyes fleet to you immediately when you entered the room and how they lingered too long for it to be a normal behaviour. Bucky was eager to greet for you even if it didn’t look like it. Bucky while accustomed to the team, was still reserved with strangers.

Steve could see that Bucky was always conscious of how he acted around you. You might not have noticed but Bucky always tried to look out for you in his own subtle way. Perhaps, it was not easy for his best friend who sometimes remained in the dark shadows of his thoughts, believing that he did not deserve to be happy with someone because of his past.

Steve knew Bucky wants to be loved by someone special and that he deserved to be loved. He just wants this punk to not sit around and wait any longer.

You decided to call it a night and wanted to return home. The girls were whining for you to stay and asked why you could not stay at the compound for good. There were plenty of rooms in the private quarters for you to call your own.

You refused, saying that you deserved your own quiet space away from dealing with this chaotic energy (referring to the team). Ro protested at your words but you just laughed it off and bid farewell to everyone.

Steve looked over to Bucky and with the power of eye contact and practically 90 over years of friendship, signalled non-verbally to Bucky that he should take action. Wanda’s voice popped up and stated that you had forgotten your car keys on the counter.

Raising his hand up, Steve indicated for Wanda to pass it over to him. Wanda gave him a smirk before using her powers to push the keys onto Bucky. Steve gave an approving nod at what she did and both people turned to Bucky to give him a ‘what are you waiting for?’ look.

Clutching the car keys in his hands, Bucky got out of his seat and gingerly made his way to the garage. He took in deep breaths as he quickened his steps in hopes of catching up to you.

Luckily, you were not far along and heading for the elevator. He called for your name and you were surprised to see him. Bucky took the last few steps to face you and he look down on the ground for a moment to adjust himself.

“You forgot your keys.” He started off nervously as he stretched out his hands to pass it to you. Your mouth made an ‘o’ shape as you realised why he even came up to you in the first place. You let out a nervous laugh and took it from him, not forgetting to thank him as well.

“It’s nothing.” Bucky replied. Silence followed with awkward tension.

“I gotta go, can’t wait to be back in bed.” You tried to break the silence. There was another pregnant pause and you chided yourself for even trying. This was going nowhere.

“Yes, you had a long day.” Bucky tried coming up with another response. No use forcing it, this was even more awkward than the time Teddy confessed to you. You heart sank in disappointment. Should you even try? Were you willing to give it up before giving it a try with Bucky?

Bucky’s movement snapped you out of your inner thoughts as he began to make his way back. He gave you a once over and nodded to bid you goodbye once more.

The words were at the tip of your tongue. You wondered if you should-

“Hey Bucky.”

Bucky stopped in his tracks and immediately turned his body back to face you. What could you possibly call him for? He made his way back to you and stood face to face to you. His eyes bore into yours and you had to take a gulp before gathering courage to speak.

“Should I go?” Your question caused Bucky to be all confused and you then realised you weren’t clear enough.

“Should I go on the date with Teddy?” While your question was indirect, but you were hoping he got the drift. If he liked you any one bit, he would not let you go on the date. If he had any ounce of interest in you, he would stop you right?

Your held strong eye contact with him, trying to gauge his feelings through non-verbal cues as you figured he was trying to come up with an answer. Seconds felt like hours, he did not give you an answer.

You let out a low chuckle. What an idiot you must have sound like? Why would Bucky care about your date at all?

“I’m sorry. I’m asking stupid questions. Goodnight Bucky.” You made your way to press the elevator and stood right in front of the lift. You hoped Bucky would just leave and save yourself from more humiliation.

As your elevator came to your floor, you were going to take one step in when you felt a hand grabbing onto your wrist. You turned to see Bucky with a slightly panicked look on his face.

“Don’t go.” You scrunched your face into a confused expression as you tried to understand what he meant. His next words caused your heart to skip a beat and the corners of your lips to move up.

“Don’t go on that date with him.”

———————————————————————

Hello my readers! You didn’t think this was the end, did you? Thanks for sticking till this end of this long ass one-shot!

Here’s the bonus epilogue for this story.

You sat in the corner of a café that you looked up online. It was a third-generation family business that had the best pastries in New York. You pick on the loose threads of your yellow gingham midi dress as you waited for your date.

The bell of the café rung to signal the arrival of a new customer. You looked up to see a man in a dark outfit of black and blue. Black jacket over a blue t-shirt and dark washed out jeans. He was wearing a glove on his left hand and an eager smile on his face.

Bucky made his way towards you and first complimented on how beautiful you looked. You returned the same compliment and ravelled in how he easily embarrassed he was at the slightest praise.

The two of you went ahead to the counter, picking out a few sweet treats and two iced coffee. When your order was set on the table, you went ahead to cut a slice of cake and offered to him first.

Bucky eagerly took it and your heart melted at the bashful boyish grin he donned. The two of you fell into an easy conversation and you brought up something on your mind.

“These pastries are so good; we should get some more and you can bring it back for the rest of the team.” Bucky nodded in agreement as he took a sip of his drink.

“You know, Natasha had something to do with bringing Teddy in that day.” Your statement had Bucky’s attention on you. “Yeah, she told me a few days after. Trust her to use her skills to do something like that.” You laughed before continuing explaining.

Apparently, Natasha had a hand in making sure Teddy replaced his colleague for the assessment that very day. When questioned if she had any intention to bring you and Teddy together in the first place, she laughed and shook her head. She always intended for this plan to push you and Bucky towards the right direction.

She believed that if Bucky realised you cannot always be there and will eventually end up with someone else possibly, he will stop being in denial. Bucky commented that Natasha truly was a work of wonder and said that he was eternally grateful for her intervention.

Bucky reached over to hold your hand with this flesh hand but you went ahead to also grab his gloved vibranium hand too. It was your way of telling him that you accepted him whole-heartedly and loved him very much.

Bucky brought both your hands up to place multiple kisses and tell you how he really felt. He knew he shouldn’t hold back his feelings anymore and that you deserved to know how important you are to him.

“Doll, you’re the best thing that happened to me.”

———————————————————————

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x y/n #marvel fanfiction #angstfordays

141 notes · View notes

ourquicksilvered · 4 years

Text

Fake Love

Bucky x Black!Reader

warnings: Smut

Bucky still isn’t trusted by civilians and the media also paints him out to be an unforgivable villain. Luckily Tony has a solution.

"No, I can't just ask her that. It's awkward and I'm not completely sure if I want to do this myself." I hear Bucky say as I walk into the lounge.

He, Steve and Sam were sitting in the common area couch in the middle of the room with Tony. On the television in front of them was yet another stupid tv host talking about Avenger gossip and how Bucky is apparently evil itself. Honestly it drove me crazy how they'd just drag his name through the mud like they knew him or as though he was in his right mind as the Winter Soldier.

"Why're y'all watching this shit?" I roll my eyes, walking into the connecting kitchen to fix myself a glass of minute maid lemonade.

"I was just explaining to Bucky that people really believe this bullshit and that it wouldn't hurt if we created some good PR for him." Tony explained.

While Sam and Steve looked like they completely disagreed with Tony, Bucky looked on the fence about it. But Tony did have a point. It's worked somewhat for Clint and Natasha as far as people accepting the fact that they were formerly assassins.

"I agree. I mean it's helped Clint and Nat. And since Wanda started going to school, people look at her as a normal-ish teen." I shrugged and took a seat next to Sam.

"But wait til he tells you how he wants to create good PR." Steve says crossing his arms.

"I was thinking you two could fake date. Or at least spend a lot more time together so the people can see that it's not just his childhood best friend that likes and trusts him." Tony says casually and I look at him like he’s grown a third head and laugh.

"That is the most cliché thing I've ever heard. Like sum' out of a cheesy rom com. Why can’t Nat do it? She's the "sexiest female avenger".”

To be honest it did bother me a little that Natasha was declared the sexiest because even though I'm very confident in myself, I realize that Natasha with her flawless white skin, curves, and thickness, she fits America's fucked up beauty standards and not me with my brown skin, locs and lean frame.

"Y/n it was just Cosmo that said that and plus Nat hasn't entirely redeemed herself in the people's eyes. Then Wanda is too young, which leaves you." Tony says and I roll my eyes.

"But not only are you incredibly beautiful, but you're the most followed on social media and the 'bad girl' on the team according to Allure. Which all makes you perfect for this. You could make Bucky likable." Tony explains trying to save his ass while still finding a way to subtly insult Bucky.

I know he was only doing this for the sake of the team and hasn’t really forgiven Bucky himself.

"Don't pressure her Stark," Bucky rolls his eyes, "Y/N you don't have to do this."

"Whatever. I'm single, could use a few free meals." I shrug, ignoring the butterflies in my stomach.

"I'll have to think about it some more." Bucky shrugs and I nod.

"I can't believe you guys are agreeing to this." Sam shakes his head laughing.

———————————-

I grip the sheets tighter and my back arches as my lover sends me to my climax. Once a slight moan escapes my mouth, he covers my mouth.

"You gotta be a good girl and stay quiet for me." He whispers with a devilish smirk.

I pull him up to my level by his hair and purr into ear, "But you and I both know I'm not a good girl."

This gets him even more turned on, causing him to roughly throw my leg over his shoulder go rougher.

"I do know that. Just like I know that this belongs to me and me only." He whispers, thrusting with each word.

It takes everything in me to hold in my moans, especially after he flips me over and takes me from behind, gripping my shoulder tightly. He then grabs my neck, choking me a bit as he pushes it down into the pillow. He relentlessly pounds into me, quickly bringing us almost to our climax but pulls out, laying on his back.

"Bring it on home." My lover says, pulling me onto his lap.

I ride him like a bat out of hell, determined to get us both off.

"Shit." He grips my waist while he hits his climax, me following suit.

I roll off of Bucky slightly panting and lay on my side after yet another night of our mind blowing sex. I put some distance between us, needing to cool down. Unbeknownst to the rest of our team -except maybe Steve- Bucky and I have been sleeping with each other for months.

We decided that it’d work out perfectly considering that he doesn't feel like he's mentally ready or himself enough to be in a relationship, and I myself am afraid of commitment. The perfect match...I guess. Of course, with Bucky being the charming, sweet guy that he is, and with me truly enjoying conversation with him, I've gained feelings that I'm not even sure are reciprocated.

I could actually imagine being committed to him, but I’m tired of his reserved nature outside the bedroom. You wouldn't really guess that Bucky was remotely interested in me other than a few sneaky glances at me and slight conversation in front of others when he has to, like this afternoon. But in bed, he's the sweetest person and we’ve shared secrets that no one on the team even knows.

While I do have my other secret affairs with other men, there’s something about Bucky that’s just different. I know that I could commit to him in a monogamous relationship but considering that that’s not even what he wants right now, I guess there’s nothing to worry about. I guess my fear is him getting tired of me. I'm slowly getting frustrated with this little game of hot and cold, that part of me is hoping that with this 'fake' dating, he'd finally become consistent in his feelings for me.

"So Buck, what do you really think about this whole publicity stunt?" I innocently ask, running my fingers down his chest.

He takes a deep breath, while I hold mine dreading his answer.

"I don't really think it's a good idea. Someone might gain feelings." Bucky sighs, bringing his hand up to his forehead.

Maybe I’m just being sensitive but I felt like that was him insinuating that I would be the one to gain feelings for him that wouldn’t be returned. I hold back the tears forming in my eyes at the rejection and thank the darkness for masking it.

"Buck, if it's you being afraid that I'll gain feelings, I can assure you that I won't. I mean the sex with you is great-- mind-blowing even. But I do still see other men that can do it just as well." I slightly lie. I mean I do have other lovers which is no secret to him but the sex isn’t nearly as great with any of them.

Moving to get out of bed so I could look for my clothes, I suddenly stop as he holds onto my wrist.

"They can give you the same? Even though you tell me how your body is mine? Or how loud you moan for me and how wet you get for me?" He asks, moving closer to me and placing a hand on the small of my back.

"Yeah, in bed you're incredible. But outside of it, it's different--we're different. We don't fit and that's okay cos there’s no worry of things getting complicated." I choose my words wisely, as I look up at him pulling away from him and putting my underwear on.

"I'm pretty sure you know how well I fit in you." He looks down at me and smirks but then pauses for a second, thinking.

"You know what, let's do it. If you think you won’t gain feelings. But no more sex after tonight." He says seriously reaching out to shake on it.

"I could say the same for you Barnes." I smirk shaking his hand and letting him pull me back into bed for the last time.

———————

Today is day one of Tony's masterplan. He believed that in order to make this whole thing believable, Bucky and I can't seem like we're suddenly in a relationship.

1) Phase one be seen with each other casually hanging out and slight flirting.

2) Phase two start posting mysterious videos and photos on social media of just the two of us.

3) Only after it's speculated that we’re together, be a bit touchier in public and neither confirm nor deny it until Tony gets me an interview with a major pop culture news outlet.

It seemed simple enough. Bucky thought this whole thing was being taken way too seriously but he also didn't know about today's pop culture.

"You ready, Y/n?" Bucky asks in a bored tone from the other side of my door, breaking me from my thoughts.

He didn't seem too enthused about being seen together out in public acting cutesy. Of course it kinda stung, because this was something that I expect of my other flings. I thought of all people, Bucky wouldn’t be ashamed of me. But at least this shows me that I really couldn't have anything deeper with Bucky. I deserve a man that would proudly show me off. It's funny how that after we start the fake dating is when slowly but surely I'm getting over him.

"One sec!" I call out, slipping on my black ankle boots and then straightening my outfit.

I was getting ready for our first outing and wasn't sure what to wear because I didn't want to look like I was trying too hard. I finally decided on a black, lace bralette with a red flannel shirt tied over it and tucked into a pair of black jeans.

"Ready." I say walking out into the hallway.

Bucky was leaning against the opposite wall, looking me up and down before smirking. The man looked like a tall glass of water in his black jeans, Timberland boots, and simple white T. Once Sam and I showed Bucky and Steve how men from Brooklyn dress today, Bucky feel in love with the typical Brooklyn style. I look down, feeling my face heat up. I hate that he had this effect on me, without even having to use words...Of course he was only smirking at me and undressing me with his eyes because it was just us two in the hall. I pull myself together and put on my sunglasses, trying to hide the fact that I was drooling over the man.

"So, what did Stark plan for us today?" He asks pushing off the wall.

"He suggested that you maybe give me a tour of Coney Island, you buy me ice cream, I laugh at your jokes and we subtly flirt." I say, holding my hand out to him.

"Sounds good to me, I guess." He shrugs and holds onto my hand with his flesh one so that I could teleport the two of us to Brooklyn.

Upon arrival, we immediately let go of each other and I fake shyly look away, but really scoping out our surroundings.

"There's a teen video taping us on his phone." I say lowly to Bucky, holding onto his metal arm flirtatiously.

He nods, looking down at me and biting his lip.

I'd be lying if I told you that that small action didn't make my heart hammer in my chest. Rather than looking for the teen, he takes my word for it and moves closer to me as we walk around, looking for something to do. He begins to show me around, telling me some of the things that he and Steve used to do back in the day and the places where Steve often got beaten up.

"Is that the Cyclone? It's still here?" Bucky asks incredulously, looking at the massive roller coaster in front of him.

"Yeah, Steve told me about your Cyclone misadventure where he threw up on your shoes." I say laughing slightly.

I loved when Steve told me stories about him and Bucky, it seemed to be when he was happiest.

"I remember that! Poor punk couldn't handle all the dips," He pauses, "Have you ever ridden it?"

"Hell no! That thing is ancient!" I exclaim pointing at the ride, causing people to stare.

"C'mon, is the badass avenger scared of heights?" Bucky teases.

I wish I could take a picture of this moment. Where he's smirking down at me with his eyes full of mischief.

I sigh heavily looking into his lively blue eyes, "Okay, I'll do it."

He practically drags me to the line.

--------

"I still can't believe the Cyclone still exists." Bucky shakes his head smiling.

"I still can't believe you talked me into going on it." I say shivering at the idea that I actually went on a roller coaster from the early 1900s.

"You looked so--" Bucky begins but gets cut off by a crowd of paparazzi that just seemed to appear out of thin air.

"Y/n! Are you and the Winter Soldier dating?" One pap asks, intruding my personal space.

Bucky instinctively puts his arm around me and pulls me close.

"Y/n are you not scared to be dating a former assassin?" Another one asks, getting a little too close as well.

"Hey, Buck? Wanna jus' continue this at the compound?" I ask not so subtly, letting the paparazzi to assume we're dating.

I could tell the questions hit a nerve with him, so the second he nodded I teleported is back to the compound. He pulls away as soon as we get there, causing me to frown but I quickly recover. Slowly but surely I know I will be getting over Bucky and his wishy washy behavior.

I didn't even bother to ask if he was alright as I walk back to my room. I flopped down onto my bed wondering why in the hell did I agree to do this thinking that he'd miraculously fall for me.

------------------------------

I realized by the second week of this fake dating that our relationship wasn't going to be the same. He was so afraid of me gaining feelings that he touched me a lot less unless we were in front of a camera, and then he started talking to me less. I constantly found myself questioning why I was still playing along with this fake dating when all it does is create heartbreak and now I have to go do my interview tomorrow morning, pretending that everything is fine and I'm head over heels for him.

Which reminds me that I have to post this obviously staged photo that Tony took of me and Bucky passed out on the couch together. If it weren't so fake, it'd be the cutest moment.

——————————

Steve Rogers was always observant. He was always the first to notice if someone did something different with their hair, if something wasn't in its usual spot or if someone was acting out of character. So it came as no surprise that Steve was able to notice that something wasn't right between you and Bucky. Of course he knew you two had been sleeping together which is why he disagreed with the whole plan, not wanting either of you to get hurt. He also knew that Bucky really and truly liked you and sometimes wouldn't even shut up about you although he'd never reveal that to you. Bucky was afraid that he wasn't good for you and was trying to push you away but Steve decided that he's not going to let his best friend ruin what might be his only shot at love with an incredible woman like you.

He marched right up to Bucky's door, pausing when he heard something being thrown against the room.

"You okay pal?" Steve asks, after knocking on the door.

In seconds, it was opened showing a disheveled looking Bucky. Bucky sighs, opening his door for Steve and letting him in.

"I'm fine, Steve." Bucky runs his hands through his hair, flopping into his bed but Steve rolls his eyes knowing obviously something was up.

"It's whatever's going on between you and Y/n isn't it? This is why I didn't want you guys doing this in the first place." Steve says after closing the door behind him.

"I only agreed to it because I wanted to sort of test out if I really could be with her. If she’d want to be with me." Bucky explains, flopping onto his bed, dejected.

"And?" Steve crosses his arms.

"I'm not good enough for her Steve. She's even said how 'we're not good for each other'. And she's right deserves someone that people aren’t afraid of. The past two weeks people have constantly asked how she isn't afraid of hurt her and—" Bucky continues but Steve cuts him off.

"Obviously it doesn't matter what they say or think. And you and I both know that the reason you two don't 'fit' is because you push her away and give her the cold shoulder. Everyone sees that Buck." Steve says taking a seat on the edge of Bucky's bed.

"So what do I do now? After this interview, she's free to dump me and move on. Which may be for the best." Bucky sighs, mentally getting angry with himself for being so emotional.

"Buck you know you won't be able to get over her just like that. The second she starts seeing other people what will you do then?" Steve asks, looking at his pitiful looking friend.

"You're right, I'll talk to her tomorrow."

------------------------------

So far the interview was going great, we'd danced, played charades, talked a bit about what it's like to be an Avenger and a Mutant and now we were onto Never Have I Ever.

"Okay never have I ever slept with another Avenger." The interviewwe smirks as the crowd cheers.

I embarrassingly look down knowing all of my relatives watch this show and turned my sign over to 'I Have'.

The crowd cheers even louder and I shake my head laughing.

"Oooh who was it? Does he or she have a name that starts with B and rhymes with Tucky?"

"Um.... more like it was Thor." I said with a completely serious look on my face and shocking the audience before cracking.

"Okay, yes it was Bucky. Sorry love." I say looking into the camera with a smirk.

"How was it?" She asks with a smirk while I hide my face in my hands.

I deserve an Oscar for my acting. You’d never tell that I was up all night crying over Bucky’s punk ass the night before.

"I'll have to tell you sometime when I know my mom isn't watching." I laugh, shaking my head.

"But all joking aside, are you two really dating?" She asks, showing paparazzi pictures on the screen.

I was getting ready to answer when I felt a presence behind me. Before I could even answer, the presence behind me yelled 'boo' and started tickling me in places not many people knew I was ticklish. I embarrassingly spazz out and fall out of my chair with tears in my eyes to see that it was Bucky who was tickling me with his flesh hand but held a bouquet of flowers in the metal one.

"Bucky! I hate you!" I tease, hopping up and playfully punching him as he nervously laughs.

"We both know that you don't." He says quietly to where only I could hear and then gives me the flowers.

I look at him in brief confusion as I take the flowers from him and the audience aws.

"We need to talk after the show." He mutters very low, placing his metal hand in the small of my back and kissing my cheek.

"So I guess that answers my question." Ellen says, as I sit back down.

"Yeah we'd been dating a little over a month actually." I smile, crossing my legs.

"Well give us the details! How'd you start dating? What is it like dating the Winter Soldier?" She asks all at once.

"I'm gonna cut you off right there. I'm dating Bucky Barnes, not the Winter Soldier. When he was the Winter Soldier he was tortured, brainwashed and unable to make his own decisions and now that he's better and tryin’ to find himself again there's all these shitty people around judgin' him and not allowing him to move the hell on." I rant crossing my arms and rolling my eyes.

"I'm really sorry that he has to go through that." Ellen said after a moment of silence.

"Yeah me too. Bucky is a little rough around the edges but he can really be sweet and super loyal. Funny too." I say a bit chuckling to myself thinking about his cracks on Sam.

-----------

After the show, I walk offstage and my smile is immediately gone from my face and replaced with worry. What could Bucky possibly have to say to me?

I walk into my dressing room and there he is on the couch, running his hands through his hair.

“Buck, you okay?” I put my flowers on the dresser and lean against it to keep distance between us.

“No, it isn’t. I fucked up.” He replies, looking up at me and seeing the confusion on my face, he continues,“I was never afraid of you gaining feelings. Hell, I thought that after all this, maybe you’d finally feel the same about me. But I’ve done nothing but push you away because I was scared.”

“Bucky, I don’t know what to say. I mean I did feel the same but now I don’t know. I can’t play this game of hot and cold anymore. I’m not sure if my feelings will change but for now, I think the best solution is to just be friends.” I answer honestly, giving him a hug.

#bucky x black!reader #bucky x reader #fake love #black avenger #Avengers #Bucky Barnes #winter solider x reader #winter soldier x black!reader #Winter Soldier

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zmediaoutlet · 4 years

Text

in support of Black Lives Matter, @manawhaat donated $10, and requested Sam Wilson, thinking about BLM. Thank you for donating!

to get your own personalized fic, please see this post. (no longer taking prompts)

Their training compound’s in Kansas, of all places. “Isn’t Superman from Kansas?” Bucky had said, quiet, when they got there, and Sam had fully turned around in the van and said, “Hang on, how do you know about Superman?” and Bucky had given him a rare spark of actual personality and said, “I’m from the ‘40s, not the 1840s,” and Sam had rolled his eyes but responded that, yes, Superman allegedly grew up in Kansas. Problem was that Superman wasn’t real. He just hung out in the comics and he had it easy, beacon of light and apple pie and the American Way, and Sam--shiny star on his shield or no--Sam was just... Sam. As for the American Way--

Bucky doesn’t seem to care. Then again, Bucky doesn’t seem to care about much. “Do it again,” he says, squinting. Sam takes a breath, takes the shield heavy in both hands. Vibranium’s as breathtakingly light as it is strong, but still, tossing a massive hunk of it around like a fancy frisbee has been taking some getting used to. He sights the target, how Bucky’s aiming his shot, and throws--and it hits mostly on-center on the first target, bounces a little off on the second, and then--shit, goes wild, and Bucky jumps and catches it with his vibranium hand, a gonging sound resonating through the practice gym.

“Damn it,” Sam sighs.

Bucky shrugs one shoulder. “Better,” he says. Economical with words, this guy. “You’ll get there.”

Sam drags a hand over his head. “You’re there now,” he says, and it’s bitter like he tries not to let out. “Cap should’ve chosen you.”

Bucky tosses the shield back to him, easy throw, and Sam catches it by the handles. “You’re Cap,” he says. Flat but steady. He nods at the shield. “It fits.”

Sam rotates the shield in his hands, looking at the burnished front. That’s him, he thinks. Red, white, and blue.

It’s harder and harder, every day. To stay here. To train. “We have to be ready,” Bucky says, and Sam knows that. There’s so much that needs to be done he feels like the world’s drowning, but there’s T’Challa and Wanda and Scott and that spiderkid in New York, and they’re doing what they can. Sam’s been Falcon for years, and before that he was a soldier--he knows that someone coming in and fumblingly trying to help just tends to screw things up more than it helps. The country doesn’t need Falcon, right now--they need their Captain. It’s been drilled into him often enough and on his better days, he believes it.

These are not better days.

The compound’s in Kansas, miles from everything. With Pepper outfitting the place with the finest tech Stark Industries had to offer, they’re hyperconnected to the rest of the world despite the distance. Means that from the living area, sitting on his ass with his hands over his mouth, Sam can see live feed from every city in the country. Every news story. Every march. Every mama who lost her baby, weeping on the national news, asking why, why. Every kid, standing up with their mask on, raising the fist of pride high--getting a rubber bullet to the eye, a baton to the head, coughing in clouds of tear gas lit in the night by flares. He cried, the first time. He’s too wrung out to cry now.

“We should train,” Bucky says, somewhere behind him.

Sam closes his eyes. “Not now, man,” he says, and there’s quiet.

The news feed keeps going, brutal. At least thirty protesters have been arrested tonight in Birmingham, after defacing a Confederate memorial dedicated to--

“Mute the TV,” Bucky says, and the house obediently goes silent. StarkTech. The whole place, wired up and ultramodern and serving them every comfort, when all around the country--shit, the world, because there were those people standing with their eyes streaming in London, in Sao Paolo, in Dakar--they’re fighting. And he’s just--

“Sam,” Bucky says. Sam opens his eyes and finds Bucky there on the other side of the couch. His hair’s dragged back in a ponytail and he’s wearing a t-shirt and sweats, but even dressed down for training Sam can’t get away from how he looks--unearthly. Something about his eyes.

“The Avengers should be able to do something,” Sam says. That feeling in his chest--that forever feeling--being discounted, looked down on, spat on, fucked over--those years of looking over his shoulder, of smiling and playing polite--to be safe, and now he’s the safest bastard in the world, when he should be-- “We could go out there. We could protect those kids. Those--god, those old men. You think if we brought out the whole team, in D.C. or Seattle, those cops wouldn’t drop their weapons and run?”

“They probably would,” Bucky says. Even. “Would that do it?”

“It’d save some of them,” Sam says, and he knows it’s true. He also knows--he shakes his head. The Avengers... they weren’t built for this. Alien invasion, wormholes opening in the sky, world war--that’s their game. The superhero game. He leans forward, watching the silent footage on the television. “I could fly in there and snatch up one of those brutal cops, and you know what’d happen? His replacement would be in there the next day.”

“Systemic,” Bucky says. “Right?”

Sam snorts. They’ve been working on Bucky’s modern knowledge. “Yeah, that’s right,” Sam says, dropping his head. His shoulders hurt. His whole body, tense and aching as a bruise. “Systemic. Good vocab word.”

Bucky sits with him. Sam tries breathing. He was a counselor, he knows the techniques, but try as he might with slow exhales it just doesn’t work. It feels like a poison, trapped inside. “I’m supposed to be Captain America,” he says, finally. “Pepper’s gonna get me wings in red, white, and blue, and I’m gonna have a uniform with the stripes, and I’ve got the shield, and none of it matters, man. None of it. I’m just gonna be a symbol they put on t-shirts, and army recruiting posters, and cops are probably gonna have Cap hats on when they go out and--” He can’t finish the thought. It’s nauseating. He swallows. “And even--I mean, I thought, I’m a black man. I’m the enemy. So, I put on that uniform, are they just gonna say--oh, Cap’s just a PR stunt now, and discount everything we’re working for here? Or--will it be, oh, Cap, he’s great, he’s one of the good ones. He ain’t a thug like the rest. I won’t even be black anymore. I’ll be Captain America, and the rest of us will still be out there dying.”

The television goes to commercial. Mattresses. Apparently that’s the ad block that suits brutality. He says, “TV off,” and then it’s just the sleek, beautiful lounge, and the supersoldier assassin carved like a statue on the other couch, and Sam sitting there. The night outside feels like a prison.

“Steve never wanted to be Captain America,” Bucky says. He’s calm, his hands--one white, one black metal--laced at ease between his spread knees. “He just wanted to help people. He was nuts about it. Always picking fights bigger than he was.” Sam huffs, even if the weight’s still too hard to actually laugh. He’s seen the exhibit, in the Smithsonian. He knew the man. He can imagine. Bucky smiles--incredibly, even if it’s brief. “He told me later that he finally got it. What it meant. There were a lot of times he didn’t agree with what we were doing, as a country, or what we were ordered to do, or what people used his image for. But he realized eventually that Captain America didn’t work for any of them. He was meant to be a symbol of what we could be. What we hoped to be. What we had to work for.”

“A gorgeous white man with perfect blue eyes?” Sam says.

Bucky doesn’t roll his eyes, even if Sam’s being obtuse. “What do you think?”

Sam shakes his head. He looks at the shield, leaned up against the other chair where he dropped it, earlier. The star’s a little scuffed, from their training. “I think a country isn’t free until everyone in it is free,” he says. “And some things are going to have to break to achieve that freedom. And I’m not doing enough to help.”

Bucky nods. “TV on,” he says, and it’s still muted but the screens light up with news feeds. The crowds of kids, in black, pushing back against the riot gear. Medics in dirty t-shirts bandaging their friends. Umbrellas lifted above their heads, protecting themselves. “They’re fighting,” Bucky says, and Sam feels the heat rising up behind his eyes, watching. These kids. These fuckin’ kids.

“Sam,” Bucky says, and Sam looks at him, swallowing. “There’s a reason Cap holds a shield.”

Deep breath, in and out. “And you got my left?” Sam says, and Bucky shrugs, like, of course. Sam nods, watching the smoke rise. “Okay,” he says, and stands up. “Okay. Let’s go.”

#fffb #manawhaat #avengers fic #sam wilson #captain america #my writing #--wrote this per request but acknowledge i'm not a poc writer #hope it reads okay

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silenceandpatiencepining · 5 years

Text

Rambling—there’s a lot on my mind today

For a while there were a couple songs on Rep that I thought were not about love at all, and were instead about Taylor’s management team—mainly I Did Something Bad and Look What You Made Me Do. Initially I wondered if Taylor was at all resentful over her PR and how it’s forced her to hide a lot of significant aspects of her life, and especially relationships (particularly with Karlie). Even though I thought it was plausible that Taylor would write about Tree/her PR team, I’m think it’s more likely that she wrote these about being bullied by her record label, how it made her feel, and how she’s been trying to break out of it.

Taylor signed with BMR when she was still a young country artist with a strong conservative fan base. Efforts to craft her public persona focused a lot on her youth and innocence. And while this really suits her first two even three albums, as Taylor started getting older, I think the scope of what she was “allowed” to say and share in her lyrics became more restricted. Any lyrics about potential relationships with other women, or songs with female love interests were edited to be gender neutral, we see the beginning of bearding, planted PR stunts/details to make the public associate already written lyrics with men Taylor was spotted with. All the shaming and overreaction about Taylor dating really picks up and there’s scandal over Taylor doing things that are incredibly normal for a girl her age to be doing. A beautiful, talented 20-something year old woman casually dates a few people and maybe has physical/sexual experiences all turns into Taylor being slut-shamed. The wholesome image of the small town girl who grew up on a Christmas tree farm and moved to Tennessee to pursue her country music dreams no longer fits the reality of a young adult exploring her art and her sexuality and expression. She’s starting to widen her genre pool. Her fan base is expanding. She’s grown. The one size fits all innocent curly blonde country sweetheart image gets tossed out entirely and now we see the beginning of Taylor’s fashion era’s—the annual style switch up that’s since given us bold red lips, vintage dresses, a bob haircut, bleached beach waves, leather and snakes, black motifs, and now pastel rainbows galore. Taylor embraced them all and always looked amazing but they were carefully crafted veneers that just went over the top of the true cat-loving, peace sign throwing Taylor we know and love.

Anyway all of this to say, Taylor has spent the majority of her career being told who to be and even though she’s truly taken on so many styles as her own, she’s been forced to or maybe just chose to communicate and express her truth to dedicated fans through the tiny little messages and Easter eggs she leaves behind. Subtle enough for the general public to glaze over, but super fucking loud for those who are willing to look closely. Quiet because anytime she talks, people are so quick to criticize without even listening.

It’s widely believed that LWYMMD was about public feuds Taylor has been involved in with other celebs and the criticism she faced for “playing the victim” but let’s consider for a moment that the PR strategy in place for Taylor to beard [with Calvin and Tom and Joe and all the others before] came initially NOT from Taylor or Tree, but instead from Big Machine Records and that these experiences helped drive the direction of the Rep album and Taylor’s behavior/Easter eggs. She really called them the fuck out while she rode out the rest of her contract and hoped to negotiate something better for her future.

I don't like your little games

Don't like your tilted stage

The role you made me play

Of the fool, no, I don't like you

I don't like your perfect crime

How you laugh when you lie

You said the gun was mine

Isn't cool, no, I don't like you

Ever since Taylor has been under BMR they’ve basically played her and exploited her for their benefit and for profit. They crafted and controlled her image, forced her to be and act like someone she isn’t, all while making a fortune. They probably tried to make her feel like she got to have a say in things but she really wasn’t given much control over herself.

I don't like your kingdom keys

They once belonged to me

You asked me for a place to sleep

Locked me out and threw a feast (What?)

The world moves on, another day, another drama, drama

But not for me, not for me, all I think about is karma

And then the world moves on, but one thing's for sure

Maybe I got mine, but you'll all get yours

Here I think Taylor is saying that yeah, at one point in time she did have some control, the power was in her hands, but once her fame and notoriety was amassing, they (BMR and management) took it from her and then went on profiting from her hard work while she continued to be used. They use her, control her public reactions, and get her involved in these feuds to stir publicity but she’s been sitting back silently taking it and plotting her rise. They’re all removed from these stunts. She’s the one that had to live with it. But she’s biding her time. She’s plotting her next move. Her hints have been getting more obvious. She’s getting more bold and more public, which is showcased particularly well by her political activism and Lover era imagery.

I feel like the Reputation era in general was Taylor saying that she’s done putting up with the bullshit. She’s tired of men with power they don’t deserve constantly calling the shots and making plays at her when they only see her as dollars they can use. She’s tired of not being able to show who she loves and how she really is. She’s ready to be happy. She’s ready to put this behind her.

I think that’s what makes me feel so sick about the news of the BMR sell to fucking Scooter Braun—after all of the shit Taylor has had to deal with, after giving her all to a management team that she trusted but that used her, she entrusted her life’s work to Scott and moved on to a new label that actually gave her ownership and empowerment and actually valued her craft...and Scott sold out to the shady powers at be who are financed by people that only want to hurt, punish, or profit off of Taylor. Fucking Josh Kushner, his criminal family, and the Carlyle Group really went out there to financially back Scooter just so they could aid in his takeover of Taylor’s historical catalogue. It’s sick.

My heart really goes out to Taylor. She’s fought so fucking hard to create the incredible work she has, all while trying to make things better for other artists who don’t have the same negotiating power, and people still have the nerve to say that she’s being dramatic because she didn’t get notified of the sale sooner—this is so much bigger than that.

I know swifties are doing what they can to show their support, so I know I’m not alone in saying that I wish I could give Taylor a hug in the wake of the news breaking and the back and forth he said she said of the guilty parties desperately trying to save face through their lie-laced rebuttals to her blog.

Taylor—We stand with you. We see you. We believe you. And we’re ready to support the hell out of Lover.

#i stand with taylor #we stand with Taylor #taylor swift #lover era #big machine records #taylor swift masters #kaylor #lover album #taylor nation

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alitheamateur · 5 years

Text

The Grind-Chapter 11

Seats were limited by the time I got to the small dressing area turned conference room, so I opted to stand against the back wall instead of stepping into a crowded aisle. Plus, a standing Liv would catch his attention sooner than a sitting one. Within 5 minutes of waiting, Mendez sashayed through a side entrance, championship belt undoubtably in tow, clashing with his red, yes, RED suit of choice. Jolly ol’ Saint Nick himself would’ve turned up a nose in disgust. He took a seat, propping his prized possession in display on the white table. Prayers of pleading rolling through my head that this blatant narcissist wouldn’t drain all the life out of the room with endless ramblings for the upcoming hour. Right now, it wasn’t this particular fighter that I needed answers from. Thankful for a recording device, I muted most of the repetitive questioning until I was ready to join in.

“Yeah, Miss Elliott in the back there,” he selected.

“Congratulations on the victory, Danny. I was wondering, if Colton were to call you out for the title again, would you accept?”

He chuckled, “ I mean, yeah. I beat the guy once, so I wouldn’t have a problem doing it again. All jokes aside though, honestly, the guy is scrappy in the cage. I’ll give him that.” In Danny Mendez translation, that was a compliment.

His session ended with mumbling something about having a bottle on ice and blah, blah, blah, leaving us now to wait for the losing man of the hour. Upon 15 very exasperated minutes, two reporters withdrew due to justified impatience of Colton’s delay. Amongst the growing chatters, the black hands of a clock at the rear of the room ticked noisily, it’s repetitive soundtrack creating a deafening echo amid the whispering gallery. After what I assumed was at least 25 minutes passing, an unidentified blonde wearing some sort of badge on her hip, resolutely marched her way front and center.

“Alright guys, that’s gonna be it for tonight. Sorry to disappoint.”

I teetered between irritation, and concern. Was this one of his rebellious PR stunts? Or was he currently being rushed to the nearest emergency room for some kind of growing side effects resulting from an unanticipated injury? I would’ve liked to think Mac, Beth, or perhaps some member of his team would’ve had the courtesy to think of me if that was the case. However, after the cold shoulder from Colton earlier, maybe I was no longer in the inner circle. No longer one of the “popular kids.” Surely, I hadn’t already been tossed aside to join the other outcasted groupies already?

We filed out of the room scattering down different hallways, and I withdrew my phone from my purse. Seeing no missed calls, I decided to lean on relief rather than panic. When I pushed the panel opening the parking garage door, I slid a single key between my middle and index finger. A defense tactic that Colton stressed as dire necessity when I was alone out in the city, at night especially. In his words, I was evidently “green” to the harsh reality that there were indeed violent people here, who’d stab you for the 14 bucks you had in your wallet, and the busted Coach knockoff hanging over your shoulder. Back in Indiana, we didn’t even lock our cars most nights, so Colt’s enthusiastic warnings about his own close call with a mugger, did not fall on deaf ears. If any brave, or entirely ignorant individual had the gall to attempt a robbery on a barrel chested man such as my guy, they’d see me as a sure score.

I double tapped the unlock button opening the driver door, and intently scanned the surroundings when my headlights ignited. I sat aimlessly staring at the blank screen of my phone, the thunderous internal battle now underway.

Call the clueless fool, Liv. Give him the scolding he deserves.

The devil on the right: NO chance. Leave the bastard wondering where you’ve gone. If you’ve made it home safely.

Back to the left. CALL HIM. What if something bad really is going on. You’ll never forgive yourself if he’s hurt.

That was all the convincing I needed. I truly couldn’t live myself had he been unconscious in a hospital bed, suffering from some life-threatening contusion with me not at his side due to my hurt feelings. Vindicated, even still.

“It’s Colton. You know the drill. Leave a message or don’t.”

“Um, hey Colt. It’s Liv. Which you obviously know. Anyways, just checking in with you before I head home for the night. Call me back. Wanted to make sure you’re okay. Uh…yeah, that’s all. So, call me back. I love you.”

I gave myself 5 minutes in the warming car for a call back before my mind spoke up. If he is indeed hurt somewhere, a call to his phone would not be sufficient to reaching the root of the problem. So, one measly text to Beth, then I really would engage the silent treatment.

L: Sorry to bother you so late, Beth. Just checking in on Colt. I can’t seem to get in touch with him. Wanted to make sure he was alright.

The indicating bubbles of reply danced quite timely after I had hit the send button. I was impressed by the youngest generation of the baby boomer era and her swift technological skill.

B: No bother, sweetheart. He left the arena not long after you hurried off to the conference. Said he just wanted to call it a night.

So, the bastard wasn’t on his death bed in the back of some ambulance after all. Or dying in the hands of a brain surgeon attempting to locate the source of some imagined internal bleeding. Leaving him completely and utterly unexcused for the selfish, and frankly juvenile behavior. Sure, I get the loss was hanging heavy and a night alone in his own bed was therapeutic to nurse his defeat, and freshly wounded body back to health. I couldn’t be mad at him for seeking out a little isolation, I guess. That was one of the personality flaws of Colton, it seemed. Something doesn’t play out in your favor? Run. Someone questions your judgement? Shout, then run. The fact that zero communication had been made with me, the innocent spectator, was the true “no-no” in my book. Especially after the hypocrite scolded me one afternoon for leaving my phone at home on the coffee table one day on my brisk exit to work. He had driven down to the Pilot office, had the secretary summon me to the front entrance so he could reprimand me in the corner about he had worried all morning when he didn’t hear from me, and wasn’t sure if I was alive or dead. Yet, here we were. Tables indeed turned, and not even so much as a single text message just assuring me he was home safe, sound, and not experiencing signs of a brutal concussion or what not. I made up my stubborn mind that when, or if for that matter, that he wanted to talk he could find me. I wasn’t about to drag myself any further into oncoming traffic for a man who pulled stunts like this one. Not without an apology at least.

Tuesday morning. Two days since the fight. Two FULL days. Crickets. 48 hours. For all I knew, Colton Ritter had hopped a plane to Mexico and was sunning on the beach with a beautiful, topless native as we speak. Keeping the promise to myself, and my self-respect, I held my ground & hadn’t reached out to him since leaving a voicemail late after the fight. The plus side? I had an over abundance of time to finalize my article for Ryan, who had texted me with instruction to head straight for his office as soon as I made it to work. It was edited, proofread, and emailed to him by midmorning on Monday, so I was sure he’d had his chance to look over my work. I mindfully sported my best suit on this particular day, leaning if he thought the article was shit and I was in for a lecture, at least I’d look fabulous while taking my reprimanding.

I marched directly to my boss’ office at 8:00 a.m. sharp, shoulders held high ready to take whatever bad, or good that was coming my way. Two knuckle knocks to his wooden, “editor-in-chief” plated door before he granted my entrance.

“Liv, hey! Goodmorning. Come in, have a seat, have a seat.”

I flashed a reserved smile, lowering to be seated directly across the L-shaped desk from him. “You wanted to see me?”

Thankfully, he grinned brightly, “I did, yeah. Feeling a bit of relief with this one off your shoulders?”

“Actually, I enjoyed it a lot. I mean, aside from Mendez being quite the… snide character, it was honestly kind of fun for me. MMA isn’t really a sport I’ve had much exposure to, but I’ve grown pretty fond of it now.” I figured that response was better than saying “I fell in love with Colton Ritter during this process and we’ve been dating under the table for the last several months.”

Ryan leaned forward on his desk, intertwining his hands together outstretched. “That’s actually one of the things I wanted to discuss with you. This piece was by far the best work I’ve seen from you. Not to discredit any of your past articles, of course! But, it was clearly displayed that you were genuinely enjoying yourself with this topic,” he explained. “Which is why I’ve decided to move forward with publishing you front page.”

A toothy smile immediately turned my lips upward, sweating palms replaced with a leaping heart.

“I know we spoke about only going that route if Ritter took the win since the piece was centered around him. But, your writing was too unbelievably excellent to not reward the dutiful job you did.”

I tried to save face, remain composed but I cupped my hands over my cheery face and released a tiny squeal, however not forgetting to thank my boss for the career altering opportunity.

“Thank you so, so SO much, boss. Truly, I’m so grateful!”

“You earned it, Liv. But don’t thank me just yet. There’s something else I’d like to suggest.” Was he pulling the “good news first to stifle to bad news” bit with me?

“I’ve discussed it with a few of the higher ups, and I’d like to designate you as our resident journalist for all things in the world of fighting. I hope you don’t mind me saying, but I think you may have found your niche with this one. Of course, there’d be a slight increase in pay with the position.”

The heaviness of the weekends dramatic unfolding’s took a momentary backseat to the unexpected pleasantries of this spring-esque Tuesday morning. Still, this very second, the only thing I wanted to do was run to Colt with the good news…

“If you think that’s where I belong, then I’d love to give it a shot. It’s definitely a sport I’d like to continue getting familiar with.”

He nodded with a single clap of his hands, “That’s what I like to hear! We’re lucky to have you here, Elliott. I think this a good move. So, we’ll talk later on in the week to settle everything 100%. And I’ll see you on the front-page Thursday morning, my friend.”

We shook hands, and I nearly skipped the distance spanning from his office to my quaint cubicle. I wondered if the birds I heard singing a song of rejoice around my head were visible to the rest of the office. I lifted the screen of my silver laptop, primed and ready to dive into the world of my latest endeavors. I searched the internet scanning for upcoming matches in the city, some of Pittsburgh’s own who competed in the arena of cage fighting, then I heard a ding signaling a message on my unsilenced phone.

C: Meet at Mac’s soon?

The utter nerve of this guy. Sure, I haven’t heard as much as a ‘hey’ from you in two days, but I’ll be sure to leave an hour into a work day per your request. God help the male population if they’re all this clueless.

L: He speaks.

He knew me well enough to know I’d throw a tad bit of shade at him.

C: Meet me, please?

L: Its not even 10 a.m., Colton. I’m working.

C: After? We need to talk.

Oh, ya’ don’t say, genius. I’d say we were about two days overdue for a talk, sweet, silly boy.

L: 4:30. I have some news of my own too!

C: Great.

TAGS: @torialeysha @eap1935

#Tom Hardy #tomhardy #tom hardy fanfiction #tomhardyfanfic #tommy conlon #elizabeth olsen

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migleefulmoments · 5 years

Note

i've never paid attention to kaylors before but your blog today made me want to go check out the drama lol so i looked them up and HOO BOY DO THEY SOUND FAMILIAR: taytaysbeard tumblr com/post/185142193364/the-only-people-who-care-about-toe-are-people-who

Let’s read a few of Kaylor’s responses

But the evidence that she has been with Karlie and other women is not ‘to the contrary’. It is obvious and true. The ‘boyfriends’ being fake relationships is also not contrary to the evidence. That, too, is obvious.

Anonymous asked:The thing is, no-one is angry she stunted with Joe. It was her MO during the entire Rep era, and we just rolled our eyes and laughed it off. The reason it got a reaction now is that Taylor has been actively encouraging us to think the bearding was over, big changes were coming, PRIDEPRIDEPRIDE, etc. If her MO was going to be the same, she could have signaled that to us long ago. She has ways to contact us. ♠️ alone proves that. But she let this blindside us, after building all our hopes. Why?

It is her way of giving him free promo. People go look at his Instagram. If you haven’t looked don’t give him the attention. It is nothing but a couple pics of him. Remember no one ever heard of him before, and he has done nothing remarkable while playing the fake boyfriend. So his only chance for name recognition is to ride on her back. I suspect she likes it so quickly because she knows it looks ridiculous, and she hopes people will figure out that it is a promo relationship and not real.

Anonymous asked:

Why would there be really really really sad songs on this album if she’s apparently been a “happy, lovey dovey” relationship for two or so years? Oh wait. Anyway, you’re so right about her needing to stop playing the yo-yo games with this fandom. It’s confusing. Thankful for you and your work and posting everyone’s concerns because it really does help to read everyone else opinions.

Anonymous asked:

Why if during pride month Taylor and Joe both come out and explain their whole stunt history? *mic drop* “Hello world, I’m Lesbian Taylor and this is my beard friend, gay Joe. Thank you for teaching us how to be brave enough to be vulnerable TOGETHER. While our scripted romantic relation was for PR, our friendship is real. To our fans, Kaylors, Toe shippers, our LGBTQ+ friends, allies, and especially to those that never gave up hope with us, we love you! Thank you for your support! Cheers!”

Toe - Hollywood’s next leading man 😂 - as his team tries to sell him, is not coming out.

And, in the meantime we are sorry for the pain we caused members of our community.

Submission: Look away if you have too. Take care of yourself, she won’t do it for you.

I’m going to speak in generalities here, because it’s not just Taylor. It’s everyone that’s famous/a public figure with fans that is in a process of cluing in everyone that a coming out is (possibly) looming.

The worst part about this moment. The moment when you’re testing the waters, dropping hints to ease in the idea, but still keeping plausible deniability in case you get cold feet, in case your public isn’t ready and the news doesn’t seem well received.

The moment when you are effectively playing both sides with this “one foot out the door” signaling. (whether you end up coming out or not. When you toe the line. Huh. I just got that.)

That moment is devastating to the community you belong to.

The people that were supposed to get it first, have. They see it. They see you. They hear the message you’re sending. It’s this one:

You’re here. You’re queer. And that’s to stay hidden. Because you’re ashamed? Because it’s not profitable enough? Because even if I’m this big/famous/rich/powerful I can’t be me in public? The reason is different for everyone. Many are similar.

For those who have built themselves up to be a role model, this is the message people looking at them for guidance or inspiration get. This is the way to be. And that message, realistically tells all of us little nobodies average people that even GIANTS can’t do it. Can’t have the confidence to be accepted. To say “I don’t give a sh**. Watch me be myself more.”

Take it from someone who’s been around the block for a while, from that first ping when you get hope, to an eventual revelation, it can last decades. (you know. Unless they disappear back into anonymity, bury themselves so deep in lavender that you know it’ll never happen, or decide to deny parts of their attractions and only go with the opposite sex because that’s what money demands)

Decades of you being called the tinhat because you dared voicing an opinion or pointing out that the Hollywood closet is a thing. Decades of being called vile things if you persist.

So I beg of you. If this climate hurts you. Please step back. Take a breather. Look away. There are more and more happy out and proud people to give you warm feelings in your heart. It’s okay to feel deeply hurt and disappointed, and you should definitely tend that wound, whichever way works for you.

I’m leaving my name on this if TTB choses to post it. I’m about as busy as she is on occasion, but you are ALWAYS free to reach out to vent.

xoxo, 🐾

Another oldie in the fandom.

Let’s be honest, if I took the names out and didn’t tell you this was Kaylor, you would just think we had a new ccer. The simliarities between the various tinhat fandoms is something that surprises me time and time again. They all use the same language, the same tropes, the same theories, it is ridiculous.

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angstysebfan · 4 years

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PR Stunt Gone Wrong - Chapter 8

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x Reader

Summary: You are a fellow actress in the MCU, Bucky’s love interest. You met Seb during the CA: WS and you guys hit it off. Chemistry on and off the set, but never dated until after Infinity War. During filming of FATWS, the pandemic caused everything to shut down. Seb offered you to spend quarantine with him, but somewhere along the lines, things go wrong and Seb makes a PR decision.

A/N: I was going to to this in a Bucky story, but then I decided to keep it Seb. With everything going on with Seb over the last several months, I came up with this story in my head. Obviously a lot of this is made up, but it is using what we know Seb has been doing over the last several months.

Your grandfather passing hit you hard. You closed in on yourself and became almost numb. Seb was able to go with you to the cemetery this time, and held you as you watched your grandfather be buried. You decided not to stay with you mom this time and went straight back home to Seb’s apartment. When you got back you went and took a shower and climbed into bed and just stared at the ceiling.

Seb walked in to see if you were hungry, but you didn’t even answer. It was like you were in your own world, and that scared him. He thought leaving you alone for a little while would help, but when it was getting late and you hadn’t eaten, he became frustrated and felt helpless. He walked back into the bedroom, “Y/N, you have to eat something. I got you your favorite, please just eat something!” he begged.

You looked at him for a moment before resuming to stare at the ceiling. Seb sat next to you on the bed, sighing, “I know this has been a shitty month for you. I wish there was a way to make this all go away and for things to go back to normal. Just please don’t push me away. You have been so distant and quiet, and I...” he sighs again looking at you. You haven’t moved from your spot and continue to look up at the ceiling.

Seb leaves your food next to you before heading back downstairs. He doesn’t know how to make this better. He hates to see you like this and isn’t sure how long he can bear watching you like this. He knows that sounds selfish, but he just wants things back to normal. He sits at the counter and eats his food in silence, before walking into his office to write a little and speak to his agent about the upcoming months. He has a lot coming up and needs to make sure he has everything set and ready to go.

He gets a call from his PR agent to set up a Zoom meeting with a potential partner. He isn’t sure he wants to go ahead with the partnership, but he figures it wouldn’t hurt to talk. Once he is done with all his work, he heads back up to the room to see you curled in a ball on your side of the bed. He notices that you did eat, which makes him smile. He strips down to his boxers and climbs into bed, spooning you, kissing your shoulder. He smiles again when he feels you lean into him.

Over the coming weeks you started to act more like yourself, which made Seb very happy. One morning in early June you woke up with your head on his chest. You slowly tried to peel yourself away but he tightened his hold. You looked at him and saw him looking at you with a sleepy smile, “Where you running to?” he asked in his sexy morning voice. You smile and lean back into him, “I was going to go to the bathroom and then make us some food,” you say and he wraps his arm around you.

“No, stay here. Let’s just stay here for awhile,” he says. You look at him and notice an unknown emotion behind his eyes. You noticed it’s been there ever since his Zoom meeting a few days ago. “Is everything okay? I feel like something is wrong,” you ask. He pulls you in and kisses you, “I just want to lay here with you,” he says before kissing you again. You smile and nuzzle into his chest, “I love you,” you say. You swear you feel him tense up at the words, but he kisses you on the head in response.

Over the next few weeks you notice Seb acting weird. He goes from being cold one minute to wanting to be in your arms the next. He starts picking fights with you at random, and you never understand what he is thinking. He also never tells you he loves you anymore. Whenever you say to him, he answers with a smile and kiss. You feel the being stuck in quarantine might finally be getting to him, but you honestly hope this passes, and soon.

“I think I’m going to go to Spain next month,” he says nonchalantly one morning. You look up from the book that you are reading in shock. “Why?” you ask. He shrugs his shoulders, “I mean get out of here for awhile, see some people, and remember I said I was going to visit the kids,” he says. You put down your book and try to reign in on your emotions.

“Seb this is the absolute worst time to travel! In fact there are travel bans that stop people from the US going to Europe, and your going to go to Spain?” you say irritated. He is honestly not totally surprised by your response, “It’s for work, I wont be gone too long, you can come with me!” he says. You roll your eyes, “May I remind you I lost 2 family members to this shitty virus! Do you really think I am going to risk my life, as well as countless other people’s lives?” you ask.

Seb looks at you and realizes how stupid he is being. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I... I shouldn’t have even thought about it. I will cancel,” he says. You nod, but look at him unsure of how you are feeling toward him at this moment. He sighs defeatedly and walks over, squatting in front of you, “Forgive me? I wasn’t thinking. I just want things to be normal again, and I am sorry for being selfish,” he says brushing your hair back from your face.

It was honestly the first time he has touched you in a few days, so you melt into it. “Ok, I forgive you. I get it. I wish we could run away from here and go some place else, but not yet okay?” you say. He smiles and nods before walking into his office.

You watch him walk away and are not sure why you have this unsteady feeling in your gut. You feel like something is going to happen. Something bad.

Chapter 7 / Chapter 9

What’s going on with Seb? Get ready for the angst train people!! Feedback is appreciated.

Permanent Taglist: @hailmary-yramliah @tuiccim @comedictragedy @cap-n-stuff @thefridgeismybestie @swiftmind @aleaisntcreative @lookiamtrying @pinknerdpanda @morganclaire4 @iamvalentinaconstanza @verygraphicink @im-squished @joannie95 @peace-love-hobbitness @connie326 @arundhati1609 @amandamdiehl @harrysthiccthighss @its-izzys

Story Taglist: @5jacobm5 @thejemersoninferno @godohammers @adriannajackson @barikawho @uglipotata72829

#Sebastian Stan #sebastian stan x reader #sebastian stan x y/n #seb

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musicalmukebox · 6 years

Text

Let’s Get (Back) Together | l.h. (11)

Ctto of the gif!

AU: Parent Trap Dad!Luke

Summary: A strong love which led to a strong marriage and twin daughters. Yet in the end, it didn’t turn out so well. You strongly refuse to encounter him ever again. But what happens when both of you coincidentally send your twin daughters to the same summer camp in Florida after 10 years?

Word Count: 6.1k

Warnings: swearing, fighting, mentions of anxiety, anxiety attacks, bad overthinking, angst

(LONG) A/N: YES LOVES, I AM BACK FROM THE DEAD AKA COLLEGE LIFE!! First, Youngblood has dropped, alongside my panties and well-being. Second, I missed writing, yet I don’t know how consistent nor the scheduling of posting will go, so stay alert and maybe turn on those notifs!! I kinda had mental block for this one, so I do hope you still enjoy this! By the way, I’ll be using the gif above for the past and remaining chapters for easier distinguishing when I come up in any of the tags you search in. I love you all, especially those who’ve stayed!!

I don’t own Parent Trap and its ideas. It’s only used as inspiration.

1 / 2A / 2B / 2C / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7 / 8 / 9 / 10 / 11 / 12 / 13 / 14

Feedback/Questions/Others? Here.

2021, Los Angeles

“Shit, I’m nervous.”

“Don’t be, she’s kind!”

Here you are again, nervous of meeting another set of Luke’s loved ones, or maybe just one person in particular. “But Sierra Deaton is up there, being in the music industry for so long and I’m still starting out ya know.” You say, intimidated by her career so far.

Where were you both exactly? At the balcony of this club in LA, where a Miss Sierra Deaton would be performing her last show of her mini USA tour. Surprisingly, you haven’t met her considering that she is a very close friend of the band, but she is a busy artist after all and you didn’t really mind because you begin to relate. Luke did say she was a kind woman, yet you mind lets your drift into a different direction, letting you get access the worst thoughts possible.

“Babe,” Luke, seated right beside you, puts his hand on top of yours, feeling the nerves shaking in your body. “She’s been there and gets it. Trust me on that, alright?” Giving him a reassuring nod, the lights begin to dimmer and fans from the mosh pit below begin to scream in excitement.

“Woo, let’s go!” Ashton from behind your seat cheers, followed a giddy Michael. “Fucking start already!” He joked, in which Crystal reacted by hiding her face with her hand and looking down as everyone around you were laughing, even you too. Some fans from the pit noticed that voice, and were going nuts to find you guys up there. But it was short-lived when the first notes of Don’t Hurt played, shifting their attention to the stage, wherein low and behold, there she was. A mic on one hand and smiling wide.

“LA, make some noise!”

Swaying her hips along to music before opening up, she harmonized well with the backup singers. You were singing along, enjoying the lively vibe in the room. When she lit the room more with a smile.

“Luke’s right, self. No need to worry.”

“Ah, boys!!” You entered Sierra’s dressing room along with the others to see her unwinding in the couch with some wine. Getting up, she patiently gives her hellos and hugs to everyone, leaving you last. Upon your turn, she gasps lightly in awe.

“Finally, we’ve met, Miss (Y/N)!” She wraps her arms around you for a hug, which was a reassuring surprise. She was a lot shorter than you, you noticed. “Luke has told me so many great things about you.”

“Oh, he has?” You glanced at the blondie by your side, blushing. “I might’ve gotten carried away too.”

“You got him so whipped, hun.” She teased, making Luke fake a pout before he laughs along.

“I guess so? Also, it’s nice to finally meet you as well, Sierra.” You say, sounding as if you were questionable as you replied. “You performed so well awhile ago!” You praised, making her chuckle.

“Thank you very much! And to celebrate,” She takes hold of the wine bottle alongside some spare glasses by the table beside her. “Want some sangria?”

It took a simple nod then a loud “Cheers!” with everyone else there to release your nerves out. At some point, you lost count of how much glasses of Sangria you’ve drank and got a bit buzzed. Eleanor was telling a story about how she and Calum had a mini vibrator war during the recent MTV awards.

“Wait, what the fuck?!” Crystal belt out, laughing. “Was that why you squirmed a lot when you were seated with me?” Eleanor only blushing, nodding.

“I’m not surprised honestly.” Ashton added on.

“So that’s why Calum had a hard-on during our acceptance speech!” Luke says in realization, shaking his head at a red Calum, suffering from embarrassment. “I’m sorry I can’t really help what happens down there!”

“Kinky shits!” You ratted out, chugging those remaining contents of your glass. This led to a flushing feeling down there, urging you to let it out.

“Excuse me, guys,” You stood from the couch, grabbing your phone with a little wobble. “I must urinate.”

“Wow, so formal.” Brianna joked.

“She acts that way when she’s drunk.” Luke exposed, making you slap his shoulder slightly. “Hey!” He fake winced, giving a little pout.

“Don’t shade me like that!” Brushing your hair to the back flamboyantly, you quickly leave the room, pacing in search of a restroom. “Ah here!” You breathe with relief as you turned to the right and pulled the door open.

Let’s not go into detail on your session in the stall. But it was relieving and you were ready to drink a few more. After all, Luke is the designated driver tonight. Sliding your stall door open, your eyes gleamed at surprise at the sight of Sierra, arms crossed as she leaned behind the marbled cement where the faucets were located. Her facial expression was hard to decipher, yet you maintained respectful.

“Oh hey, Sierra.” You greeted instantly, trying to hide your sudden redness of cheeks.

“Oh cut off the crap, yeah?” She hissed, walking towards yourself as you begin to walk back. When you stopped at your tracks by the wall, she pointed her finger at you. “How much is he paying you?”

You were dumbfounded at this girl’s harshness. “Excuse me, but nothing!” You pushed her back, controlling your anger and non-sobriety. “What’s your problem? Luke told me you’re a kind girl.”

She laughed at the comment, stepping closer to you once more, like what the fuck? “Oh love, I am. It’s just that,” She was eyeing you up and down in utter disgust. “The past girls Luke’s been with were always PR stunts. Luke never fell in love with any of them, except his ex Arzaylea and she hurt him. Badly.“

“How the hell would you compare me to her? You just met me!”

“If there’s something I’m good at, it’s reading people, and you, Miss (Y/N), are an attention-seeking slut who wants to rank up high in the acting industry!” She shouted in anger.

“Keep that fucking anger in you quiet unless you want someone to catch us!” You motioned your hands downward, signaling her to keep her voice down. Rolling her eyes, she spoke up again, but quietly.

“You don’t deserve him.” At her tone and shaking of her head, her mood is easily interpreted.

“And you do? Hun, jealousy is not a good look on you.” Your confidence rose up, being down to get closer to her. “If he wanted you, you both would have been together and I’m still hustling at a successful career, which is something I’m aiming for.” Inhaling deeply, “He chose me, not you. Why bother, yeah?” Fluttering your lashes in innocence, you swerved against her, pulling the door open. “This isn’t over, (Y/N). The tables will turn, and I didn’t want you to watch my show! I was trying to avoid you!” She threatened.

“Well sorry Sierra, but Luke brought me along. That’s already a sign of failure, but thanks for trying!” You sassed, banging the door closed. This buzzed state of yours always brings the confidence you lack, and you were hella aware of your worth, not taking shit from anyone.

Yes, you were right earlier with your initial thoughts on this girl. Your mind tells you to tell Luke, but your heart says to keep that feud between you and Sierra since they’ve been friends for so long and you don’t want to be a friend-wrecker.

“The latter it is.”

2034, Los Angeles

“Ahh, it’s today!” Stella beamed as she tied the shoelaces of her converse. “I get to watch perform live with uncle Mikey, Cal and Ash!”

It was finally Saturday, the day of the band’s show in the Forum. As much as you didn’t want to confess, you were pretty excited to watch them because it’s a reunion too. But one thing is standing your way into enjoyment: Sierra. But whatever, what matters here are your daughters and enjoying the night with them with good music, having more family time.

“Becks texted, they’re outside!” She says, running to the front door and opening it excitedly to reveal a black van. The vehicle slid open, seeing her fellow identical seated in beside Luke. Following right behind her as you grew nearer to the entrance, you gave a wave at the Aussies.

“Hi poppet and Luke.” You say upon entering the car, taking the row of seats behind the Rebecca and Luke alongside Stella. Upon settling down, the driver continued its job to head to the Forum.

“Hi (Y/N), hey bub!” He reaches behind his seat to give a short, side hug to Stella, who did the same. He also ruffled her hair much to her annoyance. “Ah dad, stop! Oh and hey loser!” As she wiggled away from Luke’s grasp, she gave a high five to Rebecca, who initiated their handshake. The same handshake of Becks and Luke with air guitar playing in the end. “Hiya brat, hey mom!” Rebecca says, giving a kiss on your check.

At the moment, you didn’t really like the way they addressed each although you did that with your friends, even with the band. But they are sisters after all, they got to be nice. “Girls, be nice.” Luke addressed, having thought of the same things as you.

“Oh come on, dad! Those were our nicknames back in camp.” Stella addresses. “Well, when we hated each other.” Becks added.

“Wait, you hated each other?” Luke gasped, making the girls look at each other dumfounded, initiating them to tell the full story of their camp shenanigans. “Shit Becks, was Stella the girl whom you dared to jump the lake commando?”

Knowing now the full story made you proud of their character developments, putting aside their personality differences and joined together in order to make this reunion possible. As for Luke, he’s very glad to see the other half of his family despite everything. If only it wasn’t this way. Much to your surprise, the story telling lasted until you arrived the venue, seeing all these different fans of different ages lined up at the entrance. Proud was an understatement. Even after more than 20 years, they’re still very popular to the younger generations.

When the car halted near the backstage doors and got out, you began to feel nervous, shaking out goosebumps. Luke caught that moment from you just as he told the twins to behave properly as they entered backstage. “Are you okay, (Y/N)? I just saw you shake out some nerves or something.”

“Y-Yeah, it’s just pretty cold.” Luke knew you were lying straight away by the way you were breathing heavily and your eyes kept looking around.

“You can be honest with me, you know?”

Darn, he’s good. “I just don’t know how the others will react, like suddenly I cut off ties with them for so long. I think they’re still mad at me.” You overthink, getting goosebumps again.

“Hey, don’t say that.” Luke comforts, putting his hand on your shoulder, squeezing it a bit. “They miss you, and would never do that. But if something happens, I’ll handle it.” Nodding him instead of speaking another word, he leads you to the backstage. Surprisingly, a lot of backstage crew remembered you from way before, giving their hellos and small talk. You were afraid that they could say something already before even seeing your old group of friends, but Luke has your back by discreetly telling the crew to keep it a secret for now.

A good 20 minutes later, you somehow encountered and hear Rebecca giving a similar kind of Luke’s pep talk to Stella in a private part of the backstage. “But what if they don’t like me, Becks? I practically lied to them by acting like you, which isn’t a good impression.”

“Stella, they will like you! I have a feeling they missed you after so long, and besides, I’ll be here when you get nervous.” Rebecca reassures, giving her twin a tight hug before they see you and Luke during their special moment.

“You guys ready?” Luke asks, specifically to you and Stella whether you’re prepared to head further to the backstage area of the boys. You still were speechless, so you just nodded and trying to regain your calmness. “Yup, dad!” Stella expressed quietly with excitement.

Walking a few more steps and getting closer got your heart racing and thoughts running all over your head, you just kept thinking of all these different bad scenarios of what could happen and just wanted to get it over with. Stella, who was beside you, noticed the way you crinkled your eyes repeatedly and gives a squeeze on your hand. “You’ll be okay, mom. No need to panic.”

You just returned a squeeze, mouthing “thank you”. Luke was also getting pretty tense upon heading to the band backstage room, unsure of everyone’s reaction, especially Sierra. Oh shit, her. Not bad or anything he thinks, though he’s always sensed some tension between you two but he couldn’t be too sure. As he sees the sign “Band” on a door, everything felt more intense. Thank the heavens that the door was closed because it gives more time for everyone to relax.

“Well, we’re here.” He begins. “Rebecca and I can go inside first, then I’ll spill everything on your behalf so you can calm down. Is that okay?”

“Sure, dad. Go on ahead so we can get this show started!” Stella answered for you, still holding your hand. Luke gives a nod before he shifts the knob of the door to the right, letting the door open frontwards. Everyone, from the boys and their wives with the kids, was just talking and goofing around, but at the sight of Luke and Rebecca, they cheered in relief.

“Finally, you two are here!”

“God Luke, where have you been? We need our frontman!”

“It’s about time you both arrived!”

Rebecca paid respect by giving hugs and cheek kisses to her aunts and uncles, then waves at the different kids while Luke shares a laugh at their banter before he gets serious. “Sorry, guys. But, I have an excuse.”

“You got occupied with a Miss Sierra Deaton?” Michael joked, which was a struggle for Rebecca to not act disgusted.

“Nice try, Mikey, but we didn’t arrive together. I was late because instead of riding with you guys, I took a detour and brought a few other guests for tonight’s show.” Everyone’s interest peaked, dense as to what this blondie was up to.

“Who did you bring then?” Calum asked, crossing his arms. Rebecca looked back at Stella who was relatively a bit near to the door but not near enough to be seen by them, gesturing to come here. “Come here, brat!” Her relatives were confused, wondering how special this person was to her. Stella was hesitant, but she didn’t want to keep them waiting. “Wait here, mom. I’ll start.”

Stella gives a nod, but before making a move, Rebecca speaks up first before she enters. “This person is someone who I grew to love in a short span of time, almost like we’re the same.” With this pun, Stella comes inside the room with a hoodie to cover her face at first from everyone and also facing down.

“There’s no need to be shy, bub.” Luke remarks, which has the adults begin to create assumptions of who this could be, especially since they are aware that Luke only gives that nickname to one person. The kids were pretty excited to know who this was because this felt so new. Stella eventually gave in, unveiling the hood and tilts her head up to show herself. Just to add, she was right beside Rebecca. Everyone was just astonished, hands in their mouths and gasps.

“Am I tripping or is that-“

“Stella?” Bryana cuts off Ashton, still frozen at the sight of her goddaughter. Stella nodded, urging Bryana to approach her vicinity. She kneeled to her height. “I’ve missed you so much.”

Stella didn’t speak but instead gave her a heartfelt hug. “I’m Bryana, by the way. I’m your godmother.” Bryana introduces herself mid-hug. Letting go, “Oh, I know who you are, actually everyone. Well, except the godmother part, aunt Bryana.”

“What do you mean?” She asks, then by instinct, the twins looked at each other with mischievous smirks.

“Well,” Rebecca starts. “It all began when we met at camp.”

“Then we figured ‘hey why not swap so we get meet the loved ones of our mom and dad?’, which brings us to today.” Stella finishes.

As everyone tried to comprehend the situation, “So wait, if Stella was whom we had these past weeks,” Ashton pondered.

“That meant Becks was wi-“

“Me.” Eleanor was cut off by your entrance to the room, which made everyone hitch their breaths. Upon hearing your daughters talk, you knew they couldn’t do this alone, so you straightened out your nerves and just went for it. This also went Luke, whom you could easily spot the hesitation he felt with the whole explanation thing going on because it was too much to handle.

“Oh my god, (Y/N).” Crystal says, covering her mouth in surprise. Eleanor is speechless then ran to your vicinty and gave a tight hug, which you returned with a flinch. She was your best friend, and it gutted you both to have cut those ties. Well actually, you had the scissors. “I fucking missed you, (Y/N).” She blurted out, sniffling a bit as she felt all these various emotions running her veins at a fast pace.

“I missed you so much too, Eleanor.” You couldn’t contain yourself either as you respond, your voice cracking as you say those words. Eleanor’s strong movement undoubtedly created a domino effect, which led the other boys and girls to give their hellos. Surely yes, Luke was pretty nervous on bringing you along, seeing this happen first-handedly marveled him, in fact much better than he thought. The vibe felt casual, no grudges withheld and fulfillment to be reunited with a loved one.

“You haven’t changed a bit!” Crystal compliments.

“You ey, found out that you have a new film out soon!” Ashton addressed, handing you a red cup with some sort of alcohol in it.

“Yeah! Take Me or Leave Me, it’s out next week.” You plugged. Catching up slowly with life updates, laughing along to Michael and Calum’s random jokes, you unexpectedly recalled a weird sensation from when Eleanor hugged you earlier.

“You got a hard core over there, Eleanor. Been working out?”

She laughed, shaking her head. “I wish! I’m actually pregnant, babe!” You dropped your jaw, gasping “Oh my God!” and giving your congratulations. As different conversations between you and your old set of friends flowed coherently, not running out of ideas, and even getting to reintroduce yourself to some of the young children,

“Hey guys!” A tanned woman calls out as she enters inside the room, making everyone freeze. Especially you, because the voice was all too familiar. Luckily, you were facing backwards.

“Oh hi babe.” Luke greets, giving her a peck on the cheek. Everyone could just feel the awkward tension in the room, emitting twisted grins and widened eyes.

“Are you guys okay? It’s like you saw a ghost or something?” No one could respond, but you did by turning your back. A bold move indeed, but it could save everyone’s misery.

Sierra gasped before she crossed her arms before giving an all too fake smile on you, in which everyone else interprets it as just a surprised smile.

“Oh my, (Y/N)!” She exclaimed, still stood on the same position.

“Hello, Sierra.” You waved and smiled back, trying your best to be as genuine as you could be. You were more genuinely fake though. Things could get worse from here, but thankfully, one of the show managers came through.

“Show starts in 5, boys!” Sighing in relief, Luke scrambles to get his guitar, while was then followed by the other boys. As for the girls, they begin to head out and bring their kids to the designated family area of the Forum where they will watch the show. Eleanor tapped your shoulder, “Ready to go?”, hand in hand with Nick.

“Yeah, sure! Rebecca and Stella!” You called the two girls, who were in deep conversation with Alex. “Later, mom! We’re still talking!” Stella replied.

“Alex is pretty surprised that Stella and I switched. So we’re pretty much explaining everything in full.” Rebecca giggles. Letting it slide, you vacated the room with Eleanor and continued to talk about anything that you could think of, yet the topic of Sierra is the dominant one. “Well, that was awkward, huh?”

“Kinda? I mean, I really don’t care about whatever they have going on.” You casually shrugged off.

“Oh really? Might’ve felt some jealousy in the air.”

“Whatever, Eleanor. As long as they’re happy, I’m fine. Besides, what matters now to me now is our daughters.” You flatly say.

“If there is something I know about you, (Y/N), your drive for success is strong. You would never let anything you love just pass. And you are mischievous as well.” She trailed off with those words before getting to the area and hearing the excited squeals of different fans.

Meanwhile for Luke, he was unlucky to get in an argument begun by Sierra, who was furious and confused with what she saw, but one thing is for sure: Luke was heavily and soberly involved.

“How did you and her meet again? Why did you even bring her tonight? Just why is she back in our lives?” She believes that she deserves to feel the way she’s feeling because she was there to comfort Luke after the divorce, serving as his rock.

“It’s a long story babe, which I will explain later. Now please,” He put his hand on her shoulder, moving her to the side. “I have a show to play.” He says, sounding rushed as ever before running to the entrance of the stage. Sierra was beyond pissed, throwing a mini tantrum at his sudden change of mood. A change which occurred when you entered back at his life.

“That fucking bitch.” Bringing out her phone and dialing a familiar mobile number, she puts the device her ear, smirking like the devil as she thinks through what she intends on doing next after this sudden confrontation.

“Hello, Miss Deaton. It’s been a long time.”

“Lovely to talk to you again, Perez. Now, I have a story for you.”

“All my life I've been waiting for moments to come, when I catch fire and watch over you like the sun..”

You and the other girls were singing along and bopping your heads to the current song being played, enjoying the good vibes being spread. As much as you can, you stayed away from the public eye which was pretty successful so far, but mostly from Sierra. Dancing along with the twins and even cheering some lyrics out like before, it honestly felt like it was the early 2020’s again. You just haven’t felt this euphoria from a concert in so long.

Ending Catch Fire, the boys took sips of water and beer before they interacted with their audience, loud and proud. “Alright, Los Angeles!” Ashton rekindled an old meme, jumping out also from his chair and holding out his drum sticks momentarily before resting his bosom down again.

“How we feeling tonight, LA?” Luke hyped, combing his locks with his hands to get a better view of the crowd. They roared in excitement, the kind of reaction the band was used to. For sure with a catchy song like Catch Fire, another catchy song will follow up. But this setlist was different compared to the past.

“Thank you for the love, everyone! Now how about we tone the mood down a bit? Release some hidden angst in us.” Calum smoothly caressed his words, making sure his usage of different words was correct. The venue lights dimmed down, a single spotlight focused on Luke as he plucked on some guitar strings.

“We have never played the song live ever, and it’s an oldie too.”

“It makes everything more exciting, Luke. People wanted us to hear those underrated songs, so it’s a start! Besides, we need to give the people what they want!” Michael exclaimed, frenzying the fans to just reveal this song. Luke chuckled, mustering up his emotions before talking. Most especially as he saw you watching, distracting his focal point which was the audience.

As for you, you were unaware of it all. It was just like a regular concert with the band cracking jokes and playing their greatest hits. Another thing you were unaware of was that Sierra saw everything happen between Luke and you, well mostly him. She really tried to shrug it off, but every time they lock eyes, it was for a split second before he looks away and continues strumming his guitar. Jealousy was spicing up her veins.

“It’s an oldie from the Sound Good, Feels Good era, and surprisingly, it took a few runs before we fully remembered how to play it. One of my favorite songs of angst.” He paused for a moment, looking down and avoiding a gaze at anyone. He knew he was used to gigs like this, but now, it felt different because you were in the audience after all this time.

Recalling every lyric of it, he knew the meaning wholeheartedly. It was a risk he was willing to take to entertain the fans.

“This is Story of Another Us.”

The audience were astounded, finally getting a piece of a big request that has been running for so long: to play the so-called songs that “they left to die”. Screaming was an understatement, more especially when Calum sang the first few lines.

“Replay the scene over again, before the credits rolling inside my head...”

Even the other wives around you didn’t expect this, the strong yet out-of-tune vocals of Eleanor singing along because you were aware that this was one of her favorite songs of theirs.

“I don't recall a single word, you hit me faster than I heard inside my head..” She was in sync with Calum, who was crinkling his eyes as he saw her sway her hips, controlling his chuckling since the song was heartbreaking. Some fans noticed, videoing that little moment of theirs which was bound to be posted everywhere. Crystal raised her arms in the air, moving along with the rhythm of the song. Bryana films the moment, quietly humming along. The other kids were watching in awe, most especially Stella because this is the first show she seen of this band. Well, one that she will remember for a long time.

So far, this concert and this song performance embodied how mature they’ve become as they are now in their late 30’s going 40’s, emotionally mostly. Bopping along to the last few lyrics, Michael having just sung his part of the bridge, Luke had his full gaze on you, lips quivering as he opened it to sing his part before one last hurrah of the chorus.

“One last ditch, a new beginning, so take this heart, put yourself in it, this surprise ending I'm depending on…..”

Confusion raced through your mind at his action, whether if he also has a hidden agenda. He thinks he could hide his emotions with those eyes of his, but after all those years of love you had for him, you knew so well of how bad of a liar he was.

“I got a long-term plan with short-term fixes, and a wasted heart that just eclipses, and I push my luck from trust to dust enough, that's the story of another us…”

He is the first to look away, avoiding any unnecessary attention and returning his focus to the main audience. You could see the heartbreak in his eyes and vibe it too from his raspy voice. For Luke, he knows that you are just as pained, even if you tried to conceal it. That was already tough, but what more when your twins have noticed that session of yours?

With every second withering and the song fading too, you could feel your chest getting pressed too tightly from all these different emotions overwhelming you, your mind playing a role too by reminding you those painful moments of the deterioration of your past romance. Your breath span shortened as your head felt woozy, making you choke. Without warning, you made a run for it, leaving the area in a flash. This led to your daughters’ enjoyment to be interrupted by the vulnerable sight of you, their instincts kicking and telling them to help you out because it seemed serious.

Longingly searching for a private area without any staff interference and running further the corridors, you eventually found a dimly-lit spot and settled there. Leaning against the white wall and bent your knees in fetal position, many bad thoughts got you overthinking the decision of the divorce.

“You’re selfish! You made your daughters stay away from each other!”

“You should’ve gain full custody of the twins, not just one of them!”

“You failure! No wonder Luke figured that you held him back!”

“You didn’t put up a fight and gave up like a wimp!”

Your urge to shed tears grew uncontrollable, along with moderate whimpering and melting some of your makeup too. But you could care less at this point because you’ve just lost it. All those held back emotions have met you once more.

Meanwhile, the show continued on and the girls have excused themselves to their aunts, saying that they have a “monthly dilemma”.

“Oh no, do you need any help or anything?” Eleanor suggested, getting shakes from the twins’ head as a response. “Alright then, hurry back! Your dad is halfway done.” Nodding, they ran as fast they could, turning right and left on the hallway and ponders deep. “Where could’ve mom went?” Rebecca worried, her breath hiked and the feeling of worry bound to reach its peak.

“I may have seen her turn left from the corner of my eye.” Stella points out as she scratched the nape of her neck, nervous of your state. “Let’s head on then.” Rebecca rushed, going steps further than Stella, making her chase after her Australian counterpart. This went on for a few more minutes, turning another left and right.

“Stella, chill! I’m dying.” Rebecca complains. “Oh come on! Quit your comp-” Stella’s nagging was interrupted when she overheard a familiar voice in one corner, stopping dead at her tracks. Rebecca took notice, following the domino effect and shifted her direction behind to where Stella stood, her head leaning to one open corridor.

“What are you do-” Now it was Stella that was interrupted as she heard your echoing whimpers at the very end of the hallway which was wasn’t too far from where the twins were. “Rebecca, go ahead! I’ll follow!” Weirded out, Stella was about to interject, but it took a loud “Go!” from her twin to do otherwise, chasing after the now fainting noise. Rebecca discreetly followed the voice, trying to decipher who it was, why that person was inside and the main topic of discussion.

Who else could it be? Stella sneaked a glance to find Sierra drinking some sort of concoction on a wine glass and talking to a mystery person. Petty, Stella brought her phone, recording whatever she was saying. For future reference, she thought.

“Ugh Perez, I thought we got rid of her forever! ….. Oh yes, what a witty caption! Got Lily to take photos from the private area? …… Nice! But wait she left? Doubt it, her bratty twins are there. But whatever, I’ll talk to you later, can’t miss out on my fiancé’s show too much.”

whom she picked up to be a writer of some sort with the words “caption” and “photos”. Got rid? Kids? She knew straight away it was you.

With those actions occurring, Rebecca has finally found you, releasing the stress. But she pitied at the sight of you with messed up hair, makeup and flowing tears. You were too vulnerable, in every aspect and it broke her heart. Kneeling down right in front of you,

“Mom, what happened? Did something or someone hurt you?” She held her hands on top of yours. With those blue saddened eyes of hers, you couldn’t stop your tears even more because she is half of him and also the half you gave up.

“I-” You choked, your breath stiffened and halted for a moment. Taking a deeper inhale, you properly articulate words, well tried too. “I’m a selfish disappointment! I gave you up so fast when I could’ve just settled for half custody instead of a closed custody that our divorce lawyer suggested. Your dad said yes to it because he was hurt and angry just like me, but I’m your mother! I should’ve never done it!” One hand of yours was released from her grasp, tracing her soft face then brushing some hair behind.

“You’re so beautiful, and I want to know more about you.” Those words made Rebecca just as emotional, reaching over you for a hug and begins to sniffle. “

“Did you even want me just a little bit before you and dad divorced?” This was a question that has haunted Rebecca ever since she got older and knew the real story between you both, instead of the excuse of “mommy’s too busy on her business trip, baby”. Honestly, Luke sucks on hiding secrets.

“I wanted you 100 percent. I love you so much, baby. You and your sister are everything to me.”

“And dad?” That took you in for a surprise and you had no words to respond. She was anticipating for an answer, and before you say what you made up, you were abruptly saved when you heard fast shuffling in the hallway, getting you startled.

“Oh there you guys are!” It was Stella, thank God. “Mom, are you okay?” She was ready to kneel down like Rebecca, but with this mini heartfelt session reaching an end, you felt much better and you could breathe easily now.

“Oh yes, bub.” You gathered your strength to stretch your legs up and stand up, shaking off any dust in your outfit. “Thank you for coming after me. I didn’t realize how much an impact I made.”

“Well, only to the both of us. We were concerned, and our familial instincts kicked in.”

“Nonetheless, thank you, loves. Now, let’s go continue that great show of your dad’s, huh?” They nodded, but first, Stella got a mini-pack of facial tissue from her slingbag and grabbed a few. She rubbed it on your face gently. “You’ve got some smudges of mascara and eyeliner by the bottom of your eyes.” As she stopped, “All better. Let’s head back now.”

Giving her a grateful smile, you followed her lead whilst you wrapped one arm around Rebecca’s shoulder.

“I forgive you, mom. I love you so much, please never leave my life again.” Rebecca whispered, just appreciating every intimate and personal moment she can get with you. Your heart fluttered at the closure, and quickly you were back to the curtained pathway of the private family area.

“Shit, there you girls are!” Your trance was ended at the sight of a sweaty Luke, who looked nervous like you were previously. “Where have you gone? You missed 2 songs!”

“Aren’t you supposed to be performing right now, dad?” Stella questioned.

“Uncle Calum is singing Invisible with uncle Michael while I’m here to get some cool air with uncle Ash. Now, please answer my question, girls.” Rebecca and Stella had nothing to reply, dumbfounded at his nervous and stressful persona.

“Hmm, I don’t know how to say this, but Rebecca thought that she was getting her “monthly” gift for the first time, so we went searching for resources to help her out.” You covered for them.

“Oh.” He chuckled, scratching the nape of his neck like Stella earlier. “Never thought it was that. I was just worried.”

“It’s okay, dad. I feel better now.” Rebecca reassured, giving a discreet wink at you.

“Well, I’m happy, poppet. I need you to be healthy always!” He hugged her up in the air.

“Ahhh, dad let go! I might make an incident if you get what I mean.”

“Oh, shit sorry!”

“Dad, swearing!” Rebecca and Stella squealed, covering their innocent ears.

“Ashton, Luke, Cal and Mikey are almost done!” A manager called out for them.

“Well, that’s my cue, girls. See you in a bit!” He waves his hand goodbye before running off alongside Ashton.

“Aren’t you girls cunning and successful at it?” You smirked at your twins, impressed.

“Well, we got that from you, mom.”

125 notes · View notes

choco-chip-cookie · 7 years

Text

SugarDaddy!Cal Pt. 19

A/N: This chapter is long asf you guys, but I’m sure you expected it. The drama in this is to die for lmaoo, but I promised they’d be alright and I’m going to keep that promise. I wouldn’t ruin your little hearts like that. So, remember 100 notes and feedback and I hope you enjoy💕

At the rate this story gets notes, I’m pretty sure you’re all going to want the last chapter tmr. So, I’m gonna get to finishing that and try not to get upset that it’s over.

*WARNING**: Just a pinch/ mention of smut, nothing too detailed or serious.

One/ Two/ Three/ Four/Five/Six/Seven/Eight/ Nine/Ten/Eleven/Twelve/Thirteen/Fourteen/Fifteen Sixteen/ Seventeen/ Eighteen/ Nineteen/Twenty{END}

You all had been standing there in an eerie silence for what felt like hours after the recording had stopped. Calum was standing there stiffly with no sign of emotion on his face. It was as if the Māori had shut down completely after hearing the news. You were beyond nervous at this because Calum was usually one to let out his anger as soon as he felt it, he never thought about what to do, he kinda of just reacted. Luke on the other hand was praying for the ground to open up and swallow him whole instead of Calum getting to him.

“Mate…you okay?” Ashton was the first to speak as he took cautious steps towards Calum.

“You…you slept with Y/N?” Calum questioned Luke who now resembled a deer caught in headlights.

“Calum, I’m so sorry.”

“You slept with Y/N.” he repeated to himself, almost as if he had to get the words stuck in his brain so that he could believe it.“That’s got to be a joke right, you wouldn’t have…You know how much she means to me.”

“Calum-”

“What the fuck, Luke?!” He shouted, knocking over the lamp on the couch side table. The glass shattered the second it hit the floor and you had to keep your thoughts focused on the situation and not how hot you found an angry Calum to be.

You advanced towards Calum and felt a flash of hurt when he took a step back away from you. “Calum it was my fault, okay? I made a move on him and-”

“Why would you…after we practically confessed our feelings the other night and…oh my God.”

“No, Cal, it was almost a week before that.” You admitted.

Calum had to take a seat on the couch to steady his breathing. Although he wanted nothing more than to beat Luke’s face in, he knew that he couldn’t do it. Ashton and Michael wouldn’t let him if he tried.

“I think I’m going to throw up.” Calum dry heaved and grimaced when you went to touch him.“No! Don’t fucking- just don’t.”

“I’m sorry, Cal.”

“No, fuck you!” He shouted, his face heating up from the anger.“You fucking give me shit about Nicole all the time and kept me on my toes just waiting for a text message or waiting until I knew I could come over again. You had me thinking that we were going to be something more then you go fuck my best friend?!”

“It wasn’t even like that!” You argued back.“ and besides, you have a girlfriend so-”

“It’s a fucking PR stunt!” He shouted with his hands thrown in the air in exasperation. All of your mouths dropped at the confession, leaving both you and Luke feeling ten times worse.“David forced me to do it to get rid of the negative attention, but it clearly didn’t work because I can’t stay away from you.”

“I didn’t know…”

“Of course you didn’t know, that was the point.” He rolled his eyes.“That’s why I always said I couldn’t explain to you why although I had a girlfriend I kept fooling around with you. She’s just obsessive and clingy for no reason because I don’t even like her as a friend.”

“Fuck, I’m sorry, mate.” Luke seemed as if he was near tears.“ We were both vulnerable and drunk and it was a stupid mistake and-”

“Save it.” Calum laughed coldly.“This is exactly why I don’t get close to anyone, they always fuck me over.”

You could feel your heart break the minute you saw tears cloud behind his normally twinkling, brown eyes.“I didn’t fuck you over, Calum. I do feel for you,honestly.”

“How do you feel for me when you fucked my best friend?” Having Calum laugh in your face felt like a stab in the heart.“You had sex with him, then pretended as if it didn’t happen, let me come into your apartment and confess my feelings…let me make love to you and just try to excuse it by saying it was a mistake? God, I should’ve listened to Ashton months ago.”

“You don’t mean that.”

“Oh, but I do.”

Michael, Ashton, and Nicole stood and watched the drama unfold in front of them and not having a clue of what to do. Nicole was enjoying the mess she created, especially since she recently found out that Calum didn’t even like her a little bit. Michael was glaring at the redhead, pissed because this mess could’ve been avoided. Ashton, however, just sat on the couch as if he was a fly on the wall. He knew it was better to allow Calum to let out his frustrations now rather than him keeping it pent up inside and becoming a walking tick bomb.

“Cal-” you tried to reach for him again, but he smacked your hand away.

“I fucking love you.” He admitted with a few tears sliding down his cheeks, causing you to freeze up at the confession.“I’ve fallen in love with you and you went and had sex with Luke so,” he couldn’t even finish his sentence before he began to silently sob.

The other three boys looked at you, waiting for you to say something, anything , to comfort their friend. He loved you? Calum Thomas Hood had fallen in love with you?

“It didn’t mean anything, we swear.” Luke tried again.“It was just a drunken one time thing.”

“Do you even love me back, Y/N?”

You knew you loved him. You’ve known ever since he made love to you that night, but for some reason you couldn’t get the words to leave your mouth. You watched him break right in front of your eyes and it only took three words to somewhat mend him back together again. Luke was waiting on you to say it back, knowing that you loved him as well from the drunken confessions a week ago. After you just stared at him for what seemed like forever he shook his head and chuckled darkly, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Of course you don’t. ” Calum stood and ran his fingers through his messy hair, tugging at it slightly.“Why did I even think you would? Just go.”

“Calum-”

“Get the fuck out, Y/N! It’s done, it’s over, okay?! Isn’t that what you’ve wanted for the past months?!”

“No, I-”

“I think he wants you to go.” Nicole smiled and you were about to retaliate until Calum beat you to it.

“You shut up and get out too. Fuck the contract, I’m done with it. I’m done with all of this.”

You watched as the dark haired boy left all of you in the living room and the sound of his room door slamming echoed throughout the apartment. No one said anything after what all took place, eyes just examining everyone’s expression. You were the first to speak once you gathered your belongings and went to bid your goodbyes.

“So, I uh…I guess this is it.” You have them a weak smile, reaching up to quickly swipe a tear from you eye. You weren’t going to cry in front of them, you refused to.

“I’m sorry.” Luke apologized to you and you shook your head.“

"Yeah, me too.”

Then you left your friends behind, hoping that maybe you’d see them again someday.

“Y/N! Y/N!” You heard your name being shouted and the sound of heavy feet quickly making its way towards you.

A couple of moments later Connor appeared in your doorway and hopped into bed with you, causing you to let out a groan of annoyance.

“Guess what.”

Another groan.

“Felix and I are back together.” Connor cheesed as he bounced up and down in your bed. He, to you, resembled an excited kid on Christmas morning.

When he got no reply from you, he poked his head underneath your duvet and his smile melted when he noticed your red eyes and puffy cheeks.

“You okay?”

“Me and Calum are officially done.” You confessed.“And Nicole was just a stupid PR stunt. Then he admitted he loved me in front of all of the boys and I froze and didn’t say it back.”

“Oh..oh wow.” Connor couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He would’ve never thought the two of you would actually end, and he definitely didn’t expect that you would fall in love. You were after all, Y/N Y/L/N. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No…can you go get the tub of ice cream?”

“Of course, darling.”

You and Connor laid in bed silently as you both chowed down on the ice cream without exchanging words. He knew the pain you were in, so he understood why it was better to not talk about it at the moment. You’d be ready eventually.

“I don’t feel too good.” You placed the spoon into the container, sitting up quickly and holding your hand to your mouth, running to the bathroom.

“You were probably just eating it too fast.” Connor spoke loudly over the sound of your retching.

He figured that was enough of the ice cream and left to return it to its spot in the freezer. When he came back you were laying in bed, rubbing your eyes tiredly.

“It’s not that.” You tossed out the idea.“I’ve been throwing up the past couple of days and sleeping more often. It’s probably just a little bug or something.”

“You should get that checked out.”

“You know I hate going to the doctors, C. It’s just a little throw up and a few extra naps, nothing too serious. Im fine.” You rolled your eyes at the worried look Connor shot you before repeating yourself.“I’m fine.”

“Whatever.”

Three hard knocks sounded throughout the apartment and you rocked on your heels as you waited for someone to answer the door. You were terrified of the reaction you would get for returning to their home, but you desperately needed the load of clothes you had left behind. Practically half of your closet was in Calum’s room. You were pulled from your thoughts when the door opened revealing a shocked Ashton.

“Y/N?”

“Hi.”

“Uhhh…hello. How’ve you been?” He questioned you cautiously, not wanting to upset you in anyway whilst scratching the back of his neck.

“I’ve been feeling shitty.” You laughed off your pain,“But I’m here to uh..I need all of my stuff.”

“Yeah, okay. I’ll get it for you just-”

“I can’t get it myself?” You furrowed your brows together in confusion.“Why not?”

“It’s…we kind of have company and-”

“Ashton, that’s bullshit.” You rolled your eyes, beginning to become pissed off at his lame excuses. The house was completely silent and you knew if anyone was over there would at least some kind of indication of their presence. There weren’t even any cars to show that anyone was there besides the residents. “I know what I did was wrong, but the least you could do is allow me to get my own shit.”

“Y/N please don’t-”

“Excuse me.” You push passed him.

Who would’ve thought coming to get your clothes would be such a hassle. Ashton tried to get you to come back the whole walk to Calum’s room, and you were horrified once you saw the reason why.

When you opened the door, there Calum and Nicole were in all of their glory. She was riding him with her head thrown back and her eyes closed as she relished in the pleasure. Her moans aren’t even what bothered you, and neither didn’t her presence. It was more of the fact that Calum was enjoying himself, holding onto her much smaller butt the same way he used to do yours. Mumbling out the same dirty words he had told you multiple times. Running his hands along her slimmer body as if she was you. You closed the door and slowly trudged back into the living room where Ashton was already standing with open arms.

The minute he wrapped his arms around you, the tears began to flow endlessly. You had told yourself all your life that you would never cry over a boy, no matter what the circumstance was. Of course Calum would be the first one to cause that, no matter how hard you tried to fight the emotions. Ashton spoke sweet nothings into your ear as he rubbed soothing circles on your back. Seeing the toughest girls he’s ever met breakdown in his arms really tugged at his heartstrings.

“I uh…I’m sor-”

“No, I deserve it.” You interrupted with a laugh, furiously wiping the tears from you face.“I’ll just wait here until they’re done.”

“I can bring you your stuff, Y/N. You don’t have to stay.”

“I’m good.” You reassured as you took a seat on the couch.“I’ll just wait.”

Ashton decided to leave you be and went into the kitchen to finish cleaning. He had brought you a cup of lemonade while you waited for another thirty minutes before Calum had come downstairs with his sweatpants hung low on his waist. You knew he hadn’t even noticed your slouched form on the couch as he bid Nicole goodbye and sent her on her way. You assumed she called an uber since her car wasn’t parked outside. Still, Calum paid you no mind as he walked into the living room until you sniffed and made your presence known.

“Y/N? What are you-”

“Is she better than me?” You asked, fiddling with the hem of your t shirt dress and avoiding his eyes.

“What?”

“Does Nicole fuck you better than I did?”

Calum’s eyes widened as he realized that you had seen he and Nicole together. He almost felt bad for you until he remembered you had done the same thing with Luke.

“Did Luke fuck you better than me?” He shot back and you shook your head.

“No, nothing’s like you.” You denied the assumption.“I just came to get all of my stuff, anyway. I’ll be gone in a few minutes.”

Calum was thrown off by how small and quiet your voice seemed to be despite how loud and confident you usually were. He followed you up into his room and watched as you went through his closet to retrieve your items, not a word leaving your lips. He wanted you to say something, anything to him about what you had just seen. You keeping to yourself made him realize that you’ve actually given up, and he was beginning to think that he didn’t want that. He still wanted you.

“You know, I can’t even be anything but hurt.” You finally spoke to him calmly.“Even though I did it and you found out through Nicole…seeing you underneath the girl I hate the most. The girl that fucked up what we had between us…that’s probably the worst pain I’ve felt in a long time.”

He still stood silently as you moved towards the hamper to sift through the clothes to find what belonged to you.

“I was drunk and beyond vulnerable when I had sex with Luke. We were both there for each other and we shared how much we were both hurting, how we felt about you and Arzaylea. It just felt right..completely platonic, but we were okay with it.”

“It’s still wrong.”

“You don’t think we didn’t know that?” You laughed.“We thought about you before we did it and I had to remember that you had a damn girlfriend and only came around when you were horny just to get myself to go through with it. I had thought you moved on and decided it was time for me to do the same.”

“With my best friend, though, Y/N? How’d did you possibly think that was okay?”

“I didn’t once I came to my right mind the next morning.”

He watched as you stopped searching through the clothes to look over at him, a tear slipping down your cheek as you continued.“But that’s my excuse of why I did it. You’re not drunk. I’m sure she didn’t take advantage of your vulnerability because you seem fine, you’re glowing actually. So, what’s your excuse as to why you had sex with her?” You spat.

Calum didn’t have an answer and reached up to tug at his hair, a bad habit he’s always had. He could see all of your pain, feel your anger surrounding him. When you didn’t receive a reply from him you laughed coldly and balanced all of your clothes into your hands until you got downstairs to find a bag. His eyes followed your small frame as you passed by him with bloodshot eyes and a frown. He wanted to fight for you; he wanted to show just how much he really wanted you, but he couldn’t find himself to do it. Not with you feeling so much animosity towards him. You were almost out the door before you mumbled three words that sealed the deal for him.

“And I love you too, you asshole.”

He was positive that he had to fight for you then as he ran down the stairs to catch up with you. Calum grabbed you by your arm and spun you around, smashing his lips against yours. Your body melted against his as he poured every ounce of love and passion he could muster up into the kiss. The clothes pooled around at your feet and were completely forgotten at this point.

“I’m so sorry.” He whispered just loud enough for you to hear, pulling your close to his chest as you cried.“I just wanted to feel like I got even with you and Im an idiot and I’m sorry.”

“Stop making me cry.” You whined,trying to stop the tears from pouring down your face. God, you hated crying.

“I love you so much, princess.” He pressed kisses to your forehead in a loving manner, squeezing you tighter if possible.“Fuck, I love you so much.”

“I love you too.”

“Are you okay, babe?” You heard Calum call for you as you finished emptying your dinner into the toilet.

God, did you feel awful. One minute you were scarfing down dinner as if you hadn’t eaten in days, and the next minute your stomach was telling you that you’ve clearly made the wrong mistake. It had been doing that a lot lately. You reached up to flush the toilet and sat on the cool tile floors to recompose yourself, then lifted yourself up with the counter. You quickly brushed your teeth and splashed cool water over your heated face, then left the bathroom to rejoin Calum in his bed.

“Yeah, I’m straight.”

“You just finished puking, Y/N, you’re not.”

“I am, Calum. Shut up.”

You laid your head on your shoulder and watched his scroll through his twitter feed, running your fingers through his raven curls. You examined his face while he sat peacefully, loving the feel of your body pressed against his. It had been so long since the both of you could be truly happy, but you knew deep down that something was bound to go wrong. You never got happy endings.

“Why’re you crying?” Calum furrowed his eyebrows and sat up to be able to see you properly. You didn’t even realise that you had tears rolling down your cheeks. What the hell had gotten into you? “Babe?”

“This isn’t going to work out.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Us.” You stated simply, toying with the loose string on the basketball shorts you’d borrowed from him.“Something’s going to happen and then we’re not going to be able to be together, then-”

“Stop being stupid.”

You immediately stopped your rambling due to the harshness of his voice, although it wasn’t harsh at all. You’d used that tone on him more times than you could count, so you knew that he didn’t mean any harm.

“You love me right?” He waited for you to confirm his assumption before he continued,“And I love you too, okay? After all the shit we’ve been through these past few months do you really think I’m just going to let you go so easily?”

“You’ve done it before.” You mumbled and he smacked his lips.

“You know I didn’t want to, and it was just for a week anyway.”

“Yeah, but-”

“I’m not about to argue with you right now, Y/N.” he laughed, shaking his head at how defensive and how quick you were to argue about little situations. Calum pulled you into his chest and pressed a kiss to your lips.“I’m not going anywhere and neither are you.”

“Promise?” You held out your pinky, looking at him with hopeful eyes. You smiled when Calum wrapped his larger digit around yours, bringing the interlocked pinkies to his lips to press a tender kiss to them.

“I promise.”

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