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mad-raptorzzz · 1 month

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[ID: A drawing of two SeaWing dragons from Wings of Fire facing each other. Tsunami has her back to the viewer and is smirking with her ear tipped forward. She has mostly medium blue scales with dark blue along her spine and snout. Some of her aqua blue bioluminescent face scalers are lit up. She is smirking at Whirpool who floats in front of her. He looks stunned by the audacity of what she is saying in aquatic. His green-yellow scales are lighter on his belly and darker on his back. He has large ears for a SeaWing, which are adorned with several large hooped earrings each. Over his left eye, he has a small golden monocle which is suspended in place by a fine metal chain attached to one earring and one eye brow ring. Between them, in glowing and floating letters, it spells 'Squidface'/ End.]

The scene that made me laugh is when Tsunami learns how to speak Aquatic and the very first thing she learns how to do is basically swear. Headcannon that squidface is the SeaWing swear that functionally means dickhead. Which I think fits Whirlpool well. I tried to make him as oily as possible. His ears normally droop under the weight of all the hoops. But he's so surprised that they're sticking up quite a bit. He also has some big ears for a SeaWing. All the better to put more hoops in. I may do a bit of a redesign at some point and give him gages because that would be sweet.

Love Tsunami. Next up is a scene that made me cry.

#wings of fire #seawing wof #tsunami wof #whirlpool wof #for real though #tsunami just rolling up and swearing in a bad aquatic accent is peak tsunami energy #She definitely gets Riptide to teach her exclusively vulgar language and how to order food and drinks #Then eventually actually learns the full language #Headcannon that there are aquatic accents #there's a 'royal' accent that all the guards and royal family and those who live close to the palace have where they really annunciate #all of their words with very exact flashes and talon signs #There's a deep water accent where they rely more on flashes #There's a shore accent that's a bit more choppy as they don't speak aquatic as much #Maybe a cold water accent and a reef accent?#And seawings with freckles or birthmarks have trouble doing the flashing parts of aquatic #I like to draw Orca with a big ol birth mark over both of her eyes #which made aquatic very hard for her #Some words she said always seemed like she was screaming because of how bright the flashes were #Tsunami has a weird mix of royal with shore and with dry mouth #dry mouth is the slightly insulitng way of saying a dragon who doesn't speak aquatic naturally but has picked it up #Most of them use only talon signs but Rainwings can mimic the flashes #woof that was a lot of tags

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puppyeared · 2 months

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Ouhhhh friendship I love friendship……..

#I’m reading volumes 14-16 of the ouran manga OOUGHHH MY HEART #I love this weird little friend group so much its unreal #like u have this charming sweeps you off your feet prince but he’s actually a huge lovable idiot with a kind heart and his friends #who are all misfits that he reached out to and drew in because of his kindness and own weirdness like that shits TIGHT BRO #and the trauma part where he has some deep seated issues with love bc he thinks that itll break a family apart like with his mom #how his family isnt allowed to be together because his mom and dad fell in love and how he says he wants to build a big house #so that way one day everyone will get along as a family like. all he wants is not to lose everyone and the only way to do that is #by maintaining a certain order.. he both wants a complete family so bad and doesnt want anything to sour between anyone #so he assigns each of his friends a family role based on how he sees them and YEAH its mostly played for giggles and tamakis #already weird so its his way of showing theyre close to him but. god damn this boy has LAYERS #it also feels kinda meta towards how found family tends to get thrown around to assign characters as 'siblings' or family roles instead of #using it to describe characters who are close enough to be each others family. cuz tamakis doing that EXACT THING in a way tht #ties in with his character and i have to say its fascinating using that within the story itself and its completely plausible #theres a lot of things i can say about ouran that are good bad and questionable but. god i love it when characters are niceys to each other #i remember i really liked the mall episode bc kyoya and haruhi got to spend time together and their relationship isnt very close #but it was really nice to see their personalities bounce off each other. i think i also wouldve liked to see haruhi alone with kaoru #i also firmly believe all of the hosts are at least a little in love with haruhi and this can be anything like endearing romantic cuz like #who DOESNT love haruhi. kyoya i think would want to study her under a microscope like his fascination with her draws him in #but im fucking obsessed with whatever haruhi and tamaki have going on because YES hes obsessed with her YES he jumps at the chance to #put her in a cute costume but haruhi? she just fucking goes with it because she knows hes fun to be around even if hes a little wacky abt i #theyre all so. NNGGHHHH #ouran #ohshc #yapping

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shima-draws · 9 months

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Seething at one of the tags on that poll saying FMA is a military + genocide apologist anime have you even WATCHED it

#It’s literally the exact OPPOSITE of that lmao #Looks at the two characters’ whose motives are to dismantle the military from the inside in order to change the country #And turn it back into a democracy and stop making Amestris a military state #LITERALLY the upper ranks of the military are corrupt as fuck and Roy sees that and he’s like. Oh HELL no. I HAVE to do smth about this #And all the OTHER military folk who are ready to be tried for their crimes in Ishval bc they KNOW it was wrong.#And they’re trying to make up for it and are ready to accept the punishment for the slaughter of so many people #AND. The last fucking 15 EPISODES of FMAB are ALL ABOUT preventing another mass genocide #Literally the culmination of the entire anime is them stopping Father from wiping out an entire country just to gain the powers of ‘god’#SORRY LMAO trying not to make waves. But FMA has got some DEEP messages and character motivations #And I hate to see takes like this. Smh #What’s that one meme where it’s like. The point of the series flies over people’s heads. That’s what this is #(If the person who wrote those tags sees this I’m sorry I prommy I’m not actually mad)#(Just trying to make a point lol)#Anyway. Coughs #FMAB sweep.#Shima speaks #FMA

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atlasdoe · 2 months

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Hi my name is Ace and i'm board so here's a list of people who canonically went to Hogwarts at the same time as The Marauders in case anyone was interested.

(in low-key age order (or at least in terms of year at school)

Steve Laughalot - was captain of the slytherin quidditch team from 1968-1972

Lucius Malloy - was in his seventh year when severus snape joined hogwarts

Patricia Rakepick - was in her fifth year when the marauders first joined hogwarts and was friendly with them

Narcissa Black - was born in 1955

Davey Gudgeon - tried to touch the whomping willow when it was first planted in the marauders first year

Bertha Jorkins - was a few years older then the marauders and recognised peter from school. sirius remembered her after azkaban

Emma Vanity - was slytherin quidditch captain from 1972 - 1976

Florence Greengrass - was mentioned by bertha in a flashback from school

Gaspard Shingleton - was born in 1959

Mary MacDonald - was attacked at hogwarts by mulciber during the marauders fifth year

Lily Evans - was part of the class of 1978

Tilden Toots - was born in 1959

Adrian Carpenter - was part of the class of 1978

Alexander Stebbins - was in the same owls exam as the marauders making him part of the class of 1978

Severus Snape - was part of the class of 1978

Evan Rosier - was part of a group of slytherins that severus snape hung out with during school

Bruce Mulciber - was part of a group of slytherins that severus snape hung out with during school

Edmund Avery Jr - was part of a group of slytherins that severus snape hung out with during school

Juliette Wilkes - was part of a group of slytherins that severus snape hung out with during school

Gilderoy Lockheart - was born in 1964 (i ignore his age and make him in the same year as the marauders for shits and giggles)

Dirk Cresswell - was in the year below lily evans

Greta Catchlove - was born in 1960

Bertram Aubrey - was hexed by james potter and sirius black while at school

Regulus Black - was 18 years old when he died in 1979

Barty Crouch Jr - couldn't have been older then 19 when he was arrested in the early 80s

Lucinda Talkalot - was slytherin quidditch captain in 1976

Daisy Hockum - was born in 1962

Olivia Green - was part of the class of 1981

Duncan Ashe - was part of the class of 1981

Glenda Chittock - was born in 1964

Lord an D'Eath - was born in 1964

If you would like to know anything more about these characters I have a masterlist on google docs which include all of these and more characters along with everything we know about them in cannon :)

here's the link to that if you're interested :)

#i find it so interesting how there are so many characters who we know went to school with the marauders #yet hardly anybody knows about them cause we're too concerned with characters who were apart of the order #and then we hc them to be the marauders age when they were likely a lot older #i say this as if i don't do the exact same thing #but it's still interesting to me #the marauders #harry potter #the marauders era #marauders #severus snape #mary macdonald #evans rosier #marauders characters #slytherin skittles

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theres-whump-in-that-nebula · 4 months

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Anyone else have near-perfect executive function at work; but at home, have literally no energy or motivation to do anything except lie in a dark room, with something in or on your ears for several hours?

#It’s got to be the schedule keeping me on task at work #I love microdosing strict routines (not having an actual routine for the day; but having routines for small tasks #which piss me off if I can’t carry them out precisely the way I planned)#For instance: If I’m asked to paperclip a bunch of stuff together with multicolored paperclips of various sizes #I cannot just indiscriminately pick paperclips from the container because that is WRONG and ILLEGAL #The colors must fit the theme of the assignments; and the colors must alternate in a specific order #and the paperclips must all be the same size #If I’m asked to dump out and clean containers of writing utensils I am going to sort them by type and color #whether you like it or not #Black permanent markers have their own container in a different section from the blue permanent markers #Dry-erase markers are not to be mixed with permanent markers because they are easily confused and it is WRONG and ILLEGAL #Do not fuck with the system. It’s the only organizational skill I have and by fucking GOD I’m going to use it in EXCESS #I stuff and fill out envelopes the exact same way every time because if I do it any other way it is WRONG and ILLEGAL #The stamp always goes on last to minimize monetary waste if there is a mistake #Now you’d think my room is squeaky clean and organized because of how particular I am about these small tasks #Right? Right?#NO IT IS NOT. It looks like a bomb went off. Cleaning the room is a big task which cannot be accomplished within two hours #therefore I have discarded it as anything I need a routine for because it would take too long to come up with #and it is very hard for me to do things like that without instructions or a sense of consistency #So I simply don’t #“After five years the dust doesn’t get any worse” correct; but the mold certainly does #I am convinced half my problems with organization as a kid would have been solved if I just had a hamper #“We have a clothes chute; you don’t need a hamper” Maybe you don’t but I DO #I want one now; but I’m going to use it as incentive to get an apartment #because that’s another thing I need to smuggle and I have too much already

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lurking-latinist · 3 months

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⛵

#I also keep seeing modern au aubrey-maturin art #that makes me wish I could draw and thereby contribute #unfortunately I can't even *write* modern aus generally. but I like transferring character dynamics from place to place in my brain #and I feel like I could do a university AU very nicely if I could do AUs at all #because I have had rowers in my class with as far as I could tell jack's exact personality #(unfortunately it has to be a US university AU because (a) that's what I know and (b) afaik nobody else does randomly assigned roommates)#(and I cannot pass up the opportunity for randomly assigned roommates.#OR RATHER #for 'you seem more or less human - quick let's request each other so we don't have to go into potluck'#I think that works best)#(but maybe they are both international students anyway. that works fine. & therefore extremely alarmed by potluck [can't say they're wrong]#sophie is a sorority girl. english major I think. and I can see her so clearly #(she's the part I want to draw)#she's not that into the high-octane social schedule her sorority expects her to have #but her pushy mother was a member and it is Unthinkable that sophie should not be #and a lot of the other girls are sweet :) so it's fine :) she says #feel like she has roommate issues (unlike her original self she is able to live away from mrs williams so this makes up for that)#so she's always over in jack and stephen's room. people who know her tangentially sometimes gossip about which one she's actually dating #(at that particular moment it is actually neither of them she's just hanging out with stephen)#diana freed from the shackles of 19th century womanhood creates even more and weirder drama than in canon #idk I just want to see the plot of post captain played out over text message #don't ask me HOW idk HOW i just want it #stephen is a biology major/pre-med obvs. if he can survive organic chemistry #jack is some kind of engineering major. I think he'd enjoy that with the math. diana has changed her major 7 times #(I don't know whether to put jack in rotc. I don't think it Actually actually fits - he's in the navy in canon because he's in the navy #not bc he's Inevitably Military In All Worlds. he would not want to do that if he didn't get to sail #but at the same time I find it hard to picture him not belonging to Discipline somehow.#it's more than a disinterested passion for cleanliness that drives him to wash stephen's mug for him that has had coffee and ramen in it #(and NOT in that order)#in the bathroom sink

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cthulhusstepmom · 1 year

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Ghost is a walking dichotomy, Soap has discovered. He's watched him strip the layers of a man's skin away to get information from him, seen him snap someone's neck in as little time as it takes to take a breath. But he's also so capable of heartbreaking kindness. His genuine concern for the fish, the way he saves the best part of his plate for Soap; offering it to him with reverence. The way he's cleaning Johnny's wound so tenderly. It's in these moments of gentleness where Johnny almost forgets what they do, what they've seen, who they are.

So when Ghost's voice snaps into that serious tone it's almost like a slap in his dizzy, goofily smiling, face.

"Wha?"

"Where is it? I'll get rid of it for you." Under the sharp tone is still that lethal gentleness, and even under that is a shaking fear.

"Oh, oh Ghost." He shifts, uncomfortable in his skin and wanting to be anywhere but here. "Ye... Ye cannae get rid of it."

His Lieutenant draws back a little, a mix of apprehension and offense in his eyes.

"It hurt you, nothing else matters."

Soap can feel his heart splitting as his throat starts to burn. Ghost stares up at him with fiery eyes, hands still holding his wrist so so softly.

"Where is the snake Soap? I promise you it'll never hurt you again. Whoever brought it in is going to have hell to pay too." He earnestly promises and Soap feels a single hot tear slip out of his eye.

"Ghost..." He chokes out. "Simon... It's mine."

The small room goes silent. Nothing even dares to move but for the violent flinch the sentence rips out of Ghost.

He doesn't dare say anything, doesn't dare to move or even breathe. He looks down at Ghost and Ghost meets his stare with turmoil roiling in his gaze.

Soap doesn't know what he expected, screaming or sobbing or angry silence but the frantic confusion he can see in the other man is as far as can be from what he'd thought he'd get.

They sit there like that for a few long moments, each absorbed in his own thoughts, before Ghost slowly rises from his kneel. If Johnny were in better spirits he would tease him for the quiet cracks his knees make. And with that violent tenderness he slowly curls an arm around Johnny and leans him down into the bed, pressing behind him and holding him close just like they'd done on any number of frigid nights out in the blind. And they just sit there holding each other in silence as they slowly drift into a dreamless sleep.

#in this canon this is the first time theyve done something that can't be explained away by extenuating circumstances #but you don't really save the best parts of your meal religiously for your subordinate who youre friends with #Ghost is devoted to Soap #full stop #and Soap is dedicated to Ghost 100%#i hear you “Cthulhu why are the emotionally constipated military men just cuddling instead of resolving their issues unhealthily?”#to which i say:#Ghost just had his world tilted on its axis #a constant in his life is that snakes are bad and the people who keep them are bad people who do bad things #like his father #but here's John “he owns my soul” MacTavish bleeding profusely and still not letting Ghost kill the snake also being unquestionably good #even though he understands intellectually that Soap has done bad things #hes watched the little punk blow up shit for the sake of it and literally clip a car battery to a man's ears #that doesn't matter because Johnny is Good with a capital G and he is the exact opposite of Ghost's father #so he really doesnt have it in him to be angry and he just needs to hold close to the constancy and try to reconcile his new information #And Soap is just so so ready to be immediately rejected and never see Simon again #he doesn't want to sacrifice what he maybe has with Ghost to protect his rescues #because they need him and they didnt ask to be what they are or where they are #so hes just so so relieved that Ghost hasnt ordered him out and killed all of his babies #because he's seen Ghost shoot a dog in yhe head on a mission for barking and Ghost loves dogs #he doesnt want to see what Ghost would do to an animal he doesn't like #I HOPE THIS IS BETTER THAN THE CLIFFHANGERS #GUYS THERES SO MUCH CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT COMING #AHOFFBIDKSHAIAKBZJA #cod mw2 #fish person gaz #ghost x soap #ghostsoap #reptile person soap

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cimicherrychanga · 9 months

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btw u guys have to promise to not be mad at me for becoming ur turtle mutual. please

#shut up dave #IM LIKE. NOT NORMAL ABOUT THEM. AND THIS MEANS A LOT TO ME #i nEED a special interest to consume my every waking thought in order to thrive #and after i grew out of homestuck its like i lost my spark its EXCRUCIATING.#what do you MEAN i cant draw 3 comics and 2 full piecesn write 50 page essay in one day every day if im not insane abt some piece of fictio #outrageous!!!!!#and as much as i wish i could. i cant Choose or induce this thats not how it weorks we all know this #i TRIED to make miraculous my next big thing after hs it did not work!!! im still insane abt it! but its the #watching trrailers frame by frame making longass analyses and tracking down the exact car in one scene type of insane.#sure ive made art n comics its still one of the things i was and am more invested in than about 60-something of my other media interests #but GOD then rottmnt hit me full speed. i am FEELING this one. i made art AND the characters i was scared would be impossible to draw #turned out to be. so easy? like i did a great splinter first try and thats HUGE for me usually my first attempts suck #until i develop a personal touch for their design #the style of the show is just sososo good for me. theyre my best friends now. and i INTEND to make that clear to EVERYONE #bc im still feelin lonely!!! despite everything!! and i dont want to!!!!!!!!! and im making it everyone elses problem!!!!#anyways like as i said. ur not allowed to be mad at me. please please. ive always been annoying this is just a new arc #and u have to put up wirh it. or ill cry. thanks.

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swagging-back-to · 1 month

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sooo i just had the thought of putting mochi and sushi in with the main colony instead of getting any more mice and adding them to the future 30 gallon colony....

#they actually hate eachother and i feel so bad for them bc they're all alone in there together and they have no one else but themselves #and then i look at the main colony and they all love each other and choose to ignore the adequately sized hides in order to all pile into #a single coconut on top of eachother #and then sushi and mochi choose to sleep on opposite ends of the tank.#idk #im gonna go to the breeder at the end of he month and see if there's any coat colorings i like and if not then I'll add those two to the #40 gallon tank #i also need to figure out where I'm gonna put jasmine when/if she finally recovers.#i was wanting to put her with the main colony bc that's her original group but i was also thinking of putting her with sushi nd mochi #but im afraid it would only further divide those two girls/they might target jasmine bc shes a stinky girl #either way jasmine will be going to one of the two groups eventually.#whether it be the main colony WITHOUT sushi and mochi or the main colony WITH sushi and mochi #im leaning more towards just getting a few more mice and putting them in the 30 gallon bc i don't want to have to try and sell the 30gal #nor do i want to have an extra wheel #the whole reason i got only two mice for a separate tank was bc i wanted to be more cuddly and lovey with them but so far neither of them #care about me even half as much as the main colony #which is weird bc most people say the bigger the colony is the less interested in you the mice will be. but IME it's been the exact opposit

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lorenlily · 1 month

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the "there's a good album in there" takes are so funny to me

#mostly because its the exact sentiment ive had about nearly all of her releases #i always do have to cut and/or reorder the tracks to make them feel like an album™️ for me #vs the collection of songs that are snapshots of certain points in her life which is mostly what her art has beeb #and theres nothing bad about that because they are snapshots so at the least there is usually some loose theme running through them #but the execution isnt always up to scratch in terms of song choice and order from my interpretation #and thats the thing with being a creative and putting art out to be consumed the art will be consumed and interpreted #and the interpretation is commentary on the consumers own experiences the way the art itself could be commentary of the writers own experien #and when you're putting art into the world you do have to be at peace with the fact there will be these interpretations #whether theyre in the forms of complements or criticism and be able to separate the constructive vs the not #otherwise the art can still be made it'll always find a way to be made but nothing ever has to be put out to be consumed #yeah that one quote just irked me #(and before anyone hates shes not the only artist i think this about)#dais speak not*

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clonerightsagenda · 9 months

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Realized the 'shoot the gas line' bit of the Alien Minkowski AU is just me revisiting my perennial theme of why are there guns in space. It always comes back to that.

#during the finale maxwell gets cornered by cutter and kepler and jacobi comes charging in #only for cutter to be like ah daniel! just the man I was hoping to see #shoot alana for me <3 #and kepler who is still being a huge dick about surrogates but is even less thrilled about the genocide he just learned about #is like jacobi (threatening)#while jacobi's like oh no i am not taking orders from *you* anymore #and maxwell who has been watching his line of sight goes it's ok daniel. take the shot #and he does and clips her arm and more importantly hits the gas line behind her #because you should not have guns in space!!!#after they flee the scene maxwell is probably grumbling that if SHE was a cool alien clone she could just regenerate this bullet wound #jacobi: did you want me to shoot you in the head? do you want to fucking die??#i have been alive for 2 weeks and I spent them playing parcheesi #meanwhile cutter goes to confront minkowski and lovelace and fucks up in the exact same way again #bc his weakness is the power of friendship and also this harpoon i found #minkowski's gut wound is a lot less dire though #wolf 359

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everypigeondeserveslove · 10 months

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Unhinged Person: "blah blah blah blah blah... you can't offer mild critique a character because you just don't get her like we do"

Me a person incapable of reading three blah's in row:

🎶 Badda-da-dah, badda-da-bah-bah Coming outcha mouth withcha blah, blah, blah Zip your lip like a padlock 🎶

#no but if your response to someone saying #you can't offer even the mildest lukewarm critique of this character without harassment from a certain subset of the fandom #is tell them to shut up because they don't understands that character like you do #you missed the point by a mile #and yet somehow manged to prove their exact point #and to the point of “no one care”#I care 💖#this pigeon cares 🕊#side note: apple really needs to create a pigeon emoji #In conlusion go stream Gag Order #Kesha really poped off with that album #and she does streams #critical role #bell's hells #bells hells #cr3

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lightblueminecraftorchid · 2 months

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Difficult to explain my food needs to ppl

“Well yes there’s a lot of things I can eat, but these foods are all completely off limits, these I could probably force myself to eat if I tried, and these are foods I absolutely 100% love- oh, what do I actually eat? The same 2 meals and 3 snacks with occasional variation.”

#it’s so so hard to eat a variety of food even tho I know that if I don’t I’ll get sick and sad #and stop eating my food bc of the lack of variety #but buying and preparing food I like and will eat is. hard.#I eat like. basically exclusively frozen pizza and one specific brand of orange chicken.#with smoothies and fruit popsicles and maybe bread or ice cream as snacks #the smoothies have leafs in them so I don’t die of scurvy #if I order food for delivery I get the exact same burrito from chipotle every time #truly I am a creature of routine #am I probably missing important vitamins? idk. maybe.#is there smth I can really do about that? no #believe me I have tried #blue chatter

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lanliingwang · 10 months

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mini-oberon randomly sitting on arjuna, david, or jiang ziya's head while they're doing their usual activities...

#lulas's randomness #ssjdkgh sorry the mental image just randomly came to mind #arjuna training his archery when 2nd ascension mini-oberon flies by on blanca and dismounts to sit on arjuna's head #like a cat sjkdghd #or jiang ziya fishing when the exact same thing happens #or david tending to his sheep when the exact same thing happens #in all three scenarios he surprisingly doesn't bother them with more than idle chatter (and more often than not just kinda sits there)#(which I'm not sure how ic it is -- esp since I do have vague ideas about jiang ziya and oberon in particular #being on a little less than cordial terms)#(but it's just a fun little idea sjdkghdg)#fgo #fate grand order #oberon #oberon vortigern #oberon (fate)#oberon (fgo)#arjuna #arjuna (fate)#jiang ziya #jiang ziya (fgo)#taigong wang #taigong wang (fgo)#taigong wang (fate)#david #david (fgo)#david (fate)#(absolutely not a coincidence all four of them are current big fgo faves btw sjksdhg)

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steakout-05 · 3 months

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eeuuaghh i would like everyone to know that i apologise if i have not responded to your reblogs/mentions/posts on tumblr, i have really terrible social anxiety and for some reason people talking to me makes my nervous system think i'm being hunted for sport by a resident evil boss. sorry if i havent responded i'm not being rude i'm just having a panic attack :P

additionally: social anxiety is actually the reason why a lot of my old posts from late 2022 had weird spacing and spelling mistakes. i was too anxious to type properly

#sorry this seems like a random thing to post but it has been bugging me for a little bit now and i want to post it #and by a little bit i mean the entire time i've been on this website #as for the reason i have social anxiety: i went to a really terrible high school full of dangerous people-#-who were literally like. the worst most bigoted people ever. not everyone there was bad of course but 90% of them were-#-and that stunted by social development by 5-6 years and now every time someone talks to me i feel like i'm about to get murdered #also primary school was. bad. the other kids could sniff out the autism in me and didn't like me for it #this post isn't directed towards anyone specifically but also it kinda is because there's a DM from someone-#-that i haven't responded to in literally 8 months and every time i think about it i get anxious #i'm sorry!!! i'm not trying to ignore you on purpose and i want to say something but my brain literally will not let me out of fear :(#i'm not used to getting talked to directly so every time i do my entire nervous system starts screaming and running in circles #it's kinda ridiculous because it's like. come on. why are you having a panic attack over a message on tumblr it's LITERALLY just words on-#-a screen what are you freaking out about. but also it's like hhhhh unfamiliar social situation scary. help.#unrelated to that but i am very worried about what people will think of me and like i know i really shouldn't worry about that-#-because i can't control what other people think of me and it really shouldn't be any of my or their business. but also-#-i have legitimate trauma that backs my fears up and every time someone is even slightly critical towards me my brain just goes-#-''see? it happened again i TOLD you it would happen again. idiot. you shouldn't have said anything''#and then i hide and cry and lay in bed thinking about how i'm going to die until i suddenly snap out of it and think-#-''wait hang on why should i care. i love being a weirdo on the internet why should i let my anxieties stop me''#and then it happens AGAIN and it's just a viscous cycle at that point #be silly on the internet -> detect slight criticism -> think everyone hates you again -> go back on your bullshit after 3 days of crying #and it makes sense because that exact same pattern happened to me countless times as a child.#be silly in school -> get made fun of for it -> get hated for it -> rinse and repeat until you think everyone is dangerous and they hate yo #if i could put it in a metaphor it would be like me being a little rabbit who thinks everyone is a scary wolf because of their big shadows-#-even though they're all also rabbits and i'm just paying attention to the scariest parts of them because i only know what wolves look like #trauma does fucked up things to your psyche lemmie tell you #social anxiety #anxiety disorder #i'm literally the ''too scared to order food'' stereotype except it's not a stereotype because it's real and every time i look at the 7/11-#-at my campus i go ''hm but what if they hate me for the food i buy there'' even though they're LITERALLY SELLING IT what is WRONG with me #anyway um. social anxiety sucks and i don't mean to not reply ro everyone who talks to me i am sorr y

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todayisafridaynight · 10 months

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looking back on all my y7 comics is so funny but now im compelled to organize them 'chronologically' and see what that looks like

#snap chats #i also wanna stick em in a book... nay.. i shant...#Point Is LOL #sorry just saw my fave masada| comic of mine and was like #'oh this is before arakawa gets necked isnt it thats hilarious'#but then i realized before THAT wouldve been aoki asking jo to kill arakawa #all things ive done comics of #so now im just sitting here thinking 'how many y7 comics HAVE i done and how many of them can i organize in order'#sounds like it could be funny....#ok my tummy hurt by. i have one more comm to do and then uhhh #idk the demons are whispering to me to play SADX </3 #'snap what happened to shadow' i am taking a BREAK i love my son but i also have to play Relatively The Same Route #like 28 times ok. i need to look at something else for a hot minute #ALSO I MISS MY CHAOS I WANNA SAY HI TO THEM #awful so for the past couple days my dads been calling me Every Day #i called him like Twice this past two weeks which is a LOT more than usual #and every time i did i was always crying or whatever so ig he was finally like 'lmao wait.... we should call more often....'#and now we do so im happier now :) i forget why this is relATE DI REMEMMERB #ITS BECAUSE EVERY TIME HE GOES TO HANG UP HE'LL BE LIKE 'laters :) One More Thing--'#LIKE OLD MAN YOU SAID BYE ALREADY but then i realize... of course.. im doing the exact same thing...#ok bye fr this time BYE

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