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reidscanehand · 1 year

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you’re the northern star

Inspired by this song by Dom Fera Pairing: Rockstar!Remus Lupin x fem!Reader (Modern AU) Category: Hurt/Comfort/Fluff TW: implied alcohol/drug use (really just overdoing it on Remus’ part)

Well, this is different, innit? I was rewatching the Taylor Swift Miss Americana documentary and I got an idea about a rockstar not sure of what to do with himself. Also, this is a really fucking stunning song that I’ve loved and wanted to use for a while. The other lyrics Y/N sings are another Dom Fera song called “Midnights in October”.

Three rum and cokes and a couple beers in Some lucky drunk stood up, heavy with where he’d been And he held onto someone, and he sung out compelled “You’re why I was right to trust myself”

~~~

Being a rockstar was everything Remus ever dreamed of. The Marauders had kicked off when the boys had all finished school together. Peter had quickly left before they really took off - unsurprising, really, but no less saddening - quickly replaced, though, by Frank Longbottom, who was, in fact, a better player anyway. With Frank on keyboards, Remus on bass, James on drums, and Sirius on guitar and vocals, the band really began to gel for the first time. Remus and Sirius wrote all the music and lyrics - mostly Remus, really. He could play piano, guitar, and bass, making it easier for him to arrange everything, but Sirius did his fair share. The addition of Frank seemed to symbolize a new beginning for everything, really.

That and James and Lily finally getting together. If James wasn’t so head over heels for the girl, Remus could’ve sworn he’d asked her out just for her connections.

With Lily installed as their manager, The Marauders started to play bigger venues, their songs started getting more streams, and, suddenly, they were releasing EPs, then an album released to stunning reviews and an enthusiastic and ever growing fan base. They were invited on Graham Norton, then played a UK tour, then a US tour, performing on Jimmy Fallon, and Saturday Night Live. Then the Grammys came - Album of the Year, Record of the Year, Best New Artist, and Best Rock Album, all in one fell swoop.

And Remus suddenly realized that that was all he’d ever wanted. All he’d ever wanted...and now that he had it, what was he to do? He didn’t really know. He suddenly felt embarrassed and uncomfortable. He couldn’t write, he couldn’t sleep, he couldn’t do much of anything. He played with the group, but even Sirius got on him for how bummed out he sounded while singing backing vocals. He didn’t feel like he could talk to his bandmates. He started drinking...aggressively, really. When he couldn’t sleep, he would drink to knock himself out, sometimes popping pills to help in the endeavor. Then he’d take pills to wake up, take pills to energize himself to do a show. He knew it was bad, but he felt just numb.

It was an unspoken problem with his bandmates. They knew something was wrong, especially Sirius, who was so furious with him after their last writing session - a session to which Remus arrived late and hungover - that he didn’t speak to him for almost a week unless he absolutely had to. This last leg of the US tour couldn’t be over quick enough in Remus’ opinion. Tensions were high and maybe...maybe he just needed a break? He wasn’t sure. Their Reno, Nevada shows had been sold out and with the weekend over, they’d leave the next morning for Los Angeles. Dropping his stuff at the bus and then going to his hotel room to pick up his wallet, he left the hotel without telling anyone, doubting they’d miss him. James and Lily were...canoodling in their room, Frank was facetiming back home with his girlfriend, Alice, and Sirius was seducing whatever groupie he’d brought back that evening. Remus had tried the groupie route, hoping that feeling something would bring him back to earth, but it just made him feel even more numb, really.

So, he took off. Their hotel was near enough to a bar that he walked over pretty quickly. It was some local place, he didn’t pay the name too much mind, settling at the bar and hoping no one recognized him. It was pretty dark, anyway. There was a little group playing popular music covers on a small stage in one corner, but it wasn’t too busy. Remus asked for a rum and coke, heavy on the rum. The bartender seemed to get the message and Remus quickly chugged back a couple of drinks, asking for a third when the band caught his attention.

“This is a less popular song,” a young woman says while pulling a stool up to the mic, “but it’s one of my favorites. I hope you like it.” The opening chords of the song caught his attention. He watched, transfixed, as the young woman began to sing.

“Oh, oh, oh, oh. There’s a story I tell, really just to myself. Like a prayer I sing to empty shores, so how’s it sound just like yours? How’s it sound just like yours?” she sang wistfully, her pretty voice lilting around the lyrics.

Remus hoped he wasn’t drunkenly imagining things...because he’d written this song. It was one of the first songs released by The Marauders back before...before anything, really. Before they’d turned to rock, even. It was one of the songs he’d recorded with Sirius when it was just the two of them. He’d recorded all the parts in his closet at university, sitting cross-legged on the floor to fit in there with his various instruments, and mixing the parts on his computer instead of writing a paper for his intro to philosophy course.

“There’s a spirit over midnights in October and it sings to you and only you. So, how did I hear it too? How did I hear it too?” She continues to play on ukelele as the rest of the band comes in on piano, bass, and drum, but Remus remains focused on the young woman. Her eyes are closed, but she’s smiling to herself as she sings. She looks so...peaceful. He can’t believe it’s his song that’s made her so...so happy, so wistful. The fans loved the music, sure, but Remus hadn’t seen someone love someting he’d created like this before. He sips his drink slowly, methodically. He doesn’t want to get drunk for the first time in ages. He wants to speak to this beautiful girl. He wants to tell her...he doesn’t know, but he needs to be more put together to talk to her.

“And if we try to say what we need we could be okay. We clearly believe in believing, baby, we’ll try slow, we’ll try slow. There’s a spirit over midnights in October and it sings to you, only you and now I’m singing too. And now I’m singing too. And now I’m singing too.” She finishes the song and there’s a small round of applause, led mostly by Remus. The guitarist steps up to the mic and thanks everyone, announcing the end of the set for the band. The group gets offstage and Remus tries not to seem creepy as the young woman crosses to bar, leaning over it and ordering a Jameson on the rocks.

“I’ll get it,” he hears himself say. She turns to see him and her eyes widen.

“Oh my God, you’re...you’re Remus Lupin,” she almost whispers.

“Yeah,” he shrugs unsure of what to say. He’s still not used to the fans. Thankfully, she doesn’t seem the type to freak out. In fact she looks almost embarrassed.

“I promise I had no idea you were here,” she says quietly, “I would never have played that if I’d known-”

“I loved it,” he cuts her off. “You have a beautiful voice.”

“Um,” she looks surprised, “thank you. I really...um, I’m not really a singer or-”

“Could’ve fooled me,” he teases. The bartender hands her her drinks and she seems to remember where they are.

“What’s your name?” he asks.

“Y/N,” she answers shyly. She looks down at her drink and opens her mouth, quickly closing it again, unsure of what to say. Remus feels the most sober he’s felt in ages. There’s something about this girl that’s warming him. He can feel his heart beating and it’s the most he’s felt in ages.

“Well, Y/N,” he smiles, scooting over and sitting next to her. “Tell me more about yourself.”

“I...what?” Y/N looks at him quizzically. “Don’t you have a show or...groupies to...or something?”

“I don’t have anything to do,” he teases, “except talk to the pretty lady that sang one of my oldest and most favorite songs in a random bar in Reno. So how’s about you tell me everything about yourself, hm?”

She looks at him, head tilting slightly, “Can I get you a drink?”

“A water,” he answers quietly. Her eyes glance for the briefest second at the three empty glasses next to him, but she doesn’t ask any questions. She orders him a water and scoots closer.

“So, my name is Y/N Y/L/N.”

~~~

He said Keep me up, keep me out late Keep me close, I need your faith Keep right where you are ‘Cause I followed this far Like I’m sure that you’re the Northern Star I’m sure that you’re the Northern Star

~~~

“I need a ticket for tomorrow’s show, please,” Remus asks suddenly, not quite expecting the silence that follows. He looks up and sees everyone on the bus staring at him. “What?”

“For tomorrow?” Lily questions, clearly trying not to sound surprised.

“Yes, please,” Remus replies.

“Who the hell do you know in LA?” Sirius asks far more aggressively than Lily.

“She’s not from LA,” Remus answers. “But she couldn’t get a ticket to the Reno shows, so I invited her to the LA one.”

“So there’s a she?” James teases, wiggling his eyebrows. Lily elbows him gently and then pulls her iPad over to her from the box it rests in on the bus. She opens it and clicks a few things.

“VIP, I’d imagine?” she asks without looking at him.

“If you can, that’d be cool,” Remus tries to sound nonchalant. Lily nods and continues typing.

“And what’s the name of this she?” Frank heckles, glancing at Sirius and James.

“None of your business,” Remus replies, trying to hide his smile.

“I will actually need her name,” Lily corrects.

“You can’t just put it under my name?” Remus almost whines.

“Not if you want her in the VIP area,” Lily looks at him mock accusingly. “And from the sounds of things, I assume you do.”

“Y/N,” he tells her, sighing exasperatedly. “Y/N Y/L/N.” He looks back down at his notebook, scrawling down a few ideas he’d had in his head since last night. He and Y/N had talked until the bar closed, then sat outside talking about everything and nothing until he’d had to leave for the bus. The couch shifts as Sirius plops down next to him.

“You writing?” he asks, trying to sound nonchalant.

“Maybe,” Remus shrugs, not looking at him. He can feel Sirius staring at him, but sees him nod out of the corner of his eye.

“You hungover?” Sirius asks quietly.

“No,” Remus clears his throat, finally looking up at his friend. “I’m, um...thinking of taking a break from drinking for a bit, actually.”

“Cool,” Sirius nods, a small smile playing on his lips. “Pills, too?” Remus nods and Sirius practically beams, clapping him on the shoulder and nodding. He stands, heading back to his bunk before turning around, now facing everyone, a shit-eating grin on his face, “So, will you be dedicating every song to Y/N, or...”

Remus throws a pillow at him and pretends to be annoyed, but can’t ignore the genuine joy edging its way back into his numbed heart.

~~~

Three hours in to a three minute call Some gambler wondered if she’d just won it all And she laughed when he asked if his head seemed alright Singing, “I’ve seen the bright side my whole lovely life”

~~~

“How’s the writing going?” she asks, taking a sip of water from her Stanley cup that’s just off camera. Remus leans back against his headboard and groans in response. He’s thrilled when she giggles and he looks back at the screen to catch her smile.

“It can’t be that bad,” Y/N teases.

“It’s not, actually,” Remus replies. “Album’s due to the label in about two months and we’ve finalized all but two songs in terms of lyrics. So that’s two left to record? Not too shabby since it took us so long to write the damn thing.”

“That’s amazing. More songs about...oh, what’s that new one I loved? Um...the one about Aperol?”

“’Spritz’ was more Sirius’ baby than mine, I’ll have you know,” Remus explains, “but I’ll tell him you like it, he’ll rub that in my face for ages.”

“Maybe he’ll hate me less for distracting his bassist,” she quips.

“No one hates you, darling,” Remus assures her. “If anything they’re just happy I’m smiling again.” It’s getting dark outside his window and he leans over to turn his lamp on.

“I’m sorry,” Y/N says suddenly. “I shouldn’t be keeping you up. I know the time difference is-”

“Hey, hey, hey,” he cuts her off, sitting up straighter, “I wouldn’t answer if I didn’t want to talk, love.”

“I know, but we were just going to say goodnight and then-”

“We both know,” he tilts his head teasingly, staring at her through the webcam, “that we weren’t going to just say goodnight.”

Y/N rolls her eyes but smiles, “There are better ways of telling me I talk too much.”

“I’d love it if you could talk to me all day long,” Remus assures her. “And you know that.”

“I’d like that, too,” Y/N whispers, smiling gently at him through the webcam.

“Really?” Remus asks, sitting up slightly.

“Yeah, there’s all this stuff that I want to tell you throughout the day...and I’d text you, but then I feel dumb for texting you-”

“You can text me whenever, you know that,” he reminds her. She giggles and his heart soars.

“I’ll keep that in mind when you finally get annoyed of me sending you pictures of my morning smoothies,” she teases.

“Smoothie time? Babe, I’d be heartbroken if I missed it!” She laughs and he uses the warm feeling in his chest to talk about what he’s wanted to for a few weeks now. “But...but what if...what if you were able to talk to me all day?”

She freezes, eyes growing wide, “What do you mean?”

“I know that we...I know we haven’t been together all that long,” he begins. “But, I would...I’d really like it if you’d be my girlfriend. And I’d...I’d love it if you’d come here and just be with me. You can still pursue your music here...I know that you’re...”

“I’d do it,” Y/N replies quietly.

Remus’ heart does that thing that it’s done since the moment he saw her. It feels like it’s expanding in his chest.

“Really?”

“How soon do you want me there, lover boy?”

~~~

Three weeks away from a year since the score And the reckless thieves reckoned they could get even more They ain’t casing out weddings, nah those are too big a sight They’re just looking at dresses and rings that she likes

~~~

It’s warm in the Ed Sullivan Theatre, but Stephen Colbert is easily the nicest host Remus has ever had the pleasure to meet. Despite the fact that he agreed to letting them present the new song instead of playing the lead single, Remus is still nervous.

“Three more weeks, dude,” Sirius whispers to him.

“Yeah, I know. How’s James holding up? Ready to get married?” Remus jokes, leaning back so James can hear him, whispering even though they’re on a commercial break.

James isn’t annoyed, though, he grins hugely, “Never been more ready, boys.”

“No, not that, I mean, yeah, but, you and your girl,” Sirius corrects. “One year, right?”

Remus beams himself, “Yeah, just about three weeks. Our anniversary’s, like, two days after the wedding.”

“You, um...you thinking about it?” Sirius hedges, passing side glances with Frank and James.

“About what?” Remus asks with faux innocence.

“Come off it,” Frank groans, rolling his eyes. He and Alice got married during their last break, just before the release of this new album, timing it perfectly before the madness kicked back up again.

“You guys gonna be copying everything from me and Lily’s wedding?” James teases. The boys laugh, but Remus just smiles. He glances around and spots you talking to Lily, probably going over your set list. You’ll be opening for The Marauders in most cities during this next tour. You’re a bit more indie pop than The Marauders, but the boys genuinely wouldn’t have it any other way. And the fans will likely love how you close with one of Sirius’ and Remus’ oldest songs, bringing the boys onstage with a tune of their own.

Seeing that you’re distracted, he turns back to his band, his oldest friends and whispers conspiratorially, “No...no, but, um...I mean, I’ve had the ring for about six months now.”

All three men turn and face him, eyes widening, jaws dropping.

“Dude-”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN?”

“Six months?!?!?”

“Chill,” Remus whisper yells. “I’m gonna ask when we go to Paris after the tour’s over.”

“That’s so romantic!” Frank whispers, turning away as a cameraman signals for them. James smiles and sends him a thumbs up.

Sirius stares at him for a moment longer and smiles. He mouthes, “Happy for you, dude” as Colbert introduces them.

“Back stateside for their new tour, the British rock band The Marauders is with us tonight. Originally they were going to perform the newest lead single from their new album, which Rolling Stone has called, ‘a near perfect sophomore album’, but their bassist, Mr. Remus Lupin, emailed about a week ago and asked if he could perform a bonus track. This is a bit different, isn’t it, Remus?”

Mr. Colbert looks to the band and a camera zeroes in on Remus, a kind PA holding a mic up to him.

“Yeah, it’s not...not really a rock song, I guess,” he grins as the audience titters.

“It’s called ‘Northern Star’,” Colbert says, smiling widely at him.

“Yeah, yeah,” Remus nods.

“When we started writing, Sirius and I, we had a lot of songs that sounded like this. And it took someone very special,” Remus finds Y/N’s eyes and his smile deepens, “to remind me how wonderful it felt to write like this again.”

“Well, please take it away,” Colbert finishes.

Remus nods and looks down at the piano, pulling the attached mic closer to his face as silence falls over the audience. He can feel Y/N staring at him, not expecting this at all.

“Three rum and cokes and a couple beers in Some lucky drunk stood up, heavy with where he'd been And he held onto someone, and he sung out, compelled ‘You're why I was right to trust myself’

He said Keep me up, keep me out late Keep me close, I need your faith Keep right where you are Cause I followed this far Like I'm sure that you're the Northern Star I’m sure that you’re the Northern Star

Three hours into a three-minute call Some gambler wondered if she'd just won it all And she laughed when he asked if his head seemed alright Singing, "I've seen the bright sides my whole lovely life"

She said Talk me up and talk me down Talk too long, I'll stick around Talk me into following you somewhere far Like I'm sure you're the Northern Star I'm sure you're the Northern Star

La la la

Three weeks away from a year since the score And the reckless thieves reckoned they could get even more They ain't casing out weddings, nah those are too big a sight They're just looking at dresses and rings that she likes

They said Keep me up, keep me out late Keep me close, I need your faith Keep right where you are Cause I followed this far Like I'm sure that you're the Northern Star Oh, I'm sure you're the Northern Star I'm sure And I'm sure that you're the Northern Star.”

Remus hits the last chords staring at Y/N, hearing his friends playing his beautiful song all around him, and knowing that he’s happier than he ever thought he could be. Rockstar be damned, this is what he’d always wanted.

~~~

A/N: This is different, but I hope you liked it!

Didn’t include my taglist because it’s been so long, plus this is a different fandom! Love you all xx

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blueeyedheizer · 4 years

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All Over Again - Matt (part 1)

WARNINGS: mention of a car accident, memory loss

A/N: Here it is ! The first part to my 3 or 4 parts fic. :) I know this trope is far from being original but I wanted to give it a go. Also this was originally supposed to be a one shot but the more I was writing, the more I got ideas so I decided to split it into a multiple part fics. let me know what you think xx

----

Matt was supposed to have been home from practice 2 hours ago. It was almost midnight and you were worried sick, pacing around the house and looking out the window every two minutes. You didn't think much of it at first and figured he had stayed in the studio a little longer to work on more songs, but after an hour you began to worry. You had tried calling his bandmates, but according to them he had left practice on time with everyone else.

“Did he seem upset during practice?” You questioned through the phone, biting your nails anxiously.

"It was a hard day, yeah. He kept on messing up his parts and was a bit more irritable than usual." James explains. You let out a deep, shaky sigh, one hand coming up to rest on your forehead and closing your eyes as you tried to keep your composure.

"Look James I, um- i'm sorry to bother you with this but Alex won't answer the phone either, do you think they might have gone to a pub together or something?"

"Alex went straight to his girlfriend's after practice. I'm sorry love, I really don't know about Matt. But don't worry about it too much, yeah? I'm sure he's fine. You know how he can be sometimes." you nod your head repeatedly, allowing a tear to slide down your cheek.

"Okay, yeah. Yeah, you're probably right. Thanks anyway James." you croak out before saying goodbye and ending the call. You had thought of calling Javed, but you knew it was already late and there was no way his dad would've let Matt in at such an hour. Your heart was beating insanely fast inside your chest and you were feeling like you could break down at any moment, the worst thoughts occupying your mind.

You eventually decided to lay down on the couch and play your favorite movie to try and get rid of the nagging voice in your head. Maybe he just went on a walk to clear his mind and stopped by a pub nearby. He might have met up with some friends there, which would explain why he was so late.

After a little while you heard the sound of the front door open. You immediately shot up, running over the door as Matt walked in. He didn't seem hurt at all, which was relieving. But you were still upset.

"Where the hell have you been?! Do you have any idea what time it is?!" he doesn't say anything and walks straight past you. "Matt, what's going on?!" you call after him as he makes his way to your shared bedroom.

"Why aren't you in bed?" he says coldly, completely ignoring your previous questions

"Because it's fucking midnight and my boyfriend who was supposed to be home two hours ago didn't show any sign of life until now!" you say and he scoffs. "I was worried sick, Matt!"

"I don't have a curfew to be home, Y/N. I've already had a shit day so if you could just fuck off and stop giving me unnecessary lectures I would appreciate it." you open your mouth to speak but close it again. You genuinely didn't know what to say anymore.

"Fine. Maybe I should leave and go have fun on my own somewhere then, since we don't have a curfew."

"Yeah, good. Leave. Maybe I'll finally get some peace and quiet." he spat.

With that, you turn around and walk out, grabbing your coat and car keys on your way. You storm out the front door, slamming it back close behind you and run straight to your car, silent tears leaving your eyes as you do.

You weren't sure how it happened.

Tears were blurring your vision as you drove to your best friend’s. You knew that she would gladly let you in, no matter what time of night you showed up, plus she wasn't the type to go to sleep early. You hated driving at night, but you needed to get some fresh air, you needed to get away from Matt.

You eventually began to regret your decision of leaving as the fog covered your vision more than it already was with your tears. But it was too late to come back, and you still weren't ready to face him after what had just happened. He wanted to be alone, then he was going to get his alone time. Your hand gripped the wheel tightly as you wiped your cheeks and eyes furiously, but no matter how hard you tried to calm down and focus on the road, the tears would come back and blur your vision.

And before you had the chance to react to what was coming in front of you, you felt a violent collision, and your world went black.

Matt knew something was wrong the moment his dad burst into his room in a panic the next morning.

"Dad?! What the hell are you doing here? How did you get in?!" he yelled.

It was barely 7am when he got a call from the hospital letting him know that you had been taken there after a car accident. He was in shock, barely able to let any words out. You were like a daughter to him, so the news were hard to swallow. All he did since he burst into the room was to blurt out your name along with barely coherent words between breathless pants.

"Dad? What is it? What's wrong with Y/N?!" Matt said, immediately jumping out of bed. He grabbed his clothes and put them on quickly, waiting for an answer.

"She got– she in an accident last night. It's bad." he managed to get out.

Matt's heart stopped beating for a moment as he tried to comprehend what he was being told. Everything around him seemed to have stopped as the events from yesterday flashed through his mind. He stared at his dad, speechless, his face suddenly draining of all color as his eyes filled with tears. He was suddenly hit by a wave of guilt and he felt the whole air being knocked out of him. His heartbeat picked up and the room soon felt too suffocating. He couldn't breathe, the room was spinning, his ears ringing.

His dad grabbed his face with both hands to keep him grounded him then pat his cheek slightly.

"Come on now, we have to go. She needs you, son." He said, keeping a steady gaze on him. Matt snapped out of his daze and stormed out of the room, his dad following closely. He grabbed the car keys on his way and they both headed to the hospital in a hurry. Of course Matt’s dad insisted on driving, knowing that his son was in no way able to focus on the road in this state.

By the time they got there, Matt's eyes and face were bright red from how much he had been crying. He was out the door before the car even came to a complete stop, rushing into the emergency section of the building.

He burst through the front doors and begun looking around, trying to find a nurse, a doctor or anyone that could tell him about your condition. A nurse came out of one of the many rooms and he rushed towards her, tears still streaming down his cheeks as he asked where you were.

"Could you tell me her name again?" she asked, gently placing a hand on his shoulder to calm him down. He nodded and repeated, trying to keep it together. The nurse lead him to the reception, searched through her papers then looked up after a few seconds.

"She's in surgery right now so I can’t let you go see her just yet. We're doing the best we can to keep her alive, but from what I know she got into a pretty bad accident, and this kind of surgery requires hours and hours of work." she continues and he nods, trying not to completely break down in front of her. She gives him more details about the surgery before leading him to the waiting room where your family and some friends of yours were waiting.

three days later.

''It's been over half an an hour...'' Matt finally spoke up, breaking the silence as he paced anxiously around the waiting room. "Someone should be able to tell us something by now.''

''I'm sure there's nothing to worry about, Matt." Javed answered softly in an attempt to comfort both himself and Matt. Matt sighed and nodded before he finally sat down in the space between James and Javed. No one was speaking. Everyone avoided eye contact, too busy being lost in their own thoughts, moving their legs anxiously. Matt however couldn't stay still, but no one could blame him. He had been staying with you every day since you got there, even though you weren't awake, and now that they finally had some news they wouldn't let him see you. Family first.

He fidgeted and bit his lips nervously, the worst thoughts constantly occupying his mind. He buried his face in his hands, more tears falling down his face. Needless to say, no one had ever seen him like this before. He looked extremely tired and sleep-deprived, and the guilt was eating him alive. Javed placed a comforting hand on his back.

"You need to stop blaming yourself, Matt. This is not your fault." he says. "She’s going to be okay."

“It is my fault, J. If I hadn’t come home so late and told her to leave...—” he chokes, opening his mouth before closing it again. "She went out because of me. She's here because of me. If she had died—" he starts, but James interrupts him.

"But she's alive, mate. That's all that matters right now. You can't take back what you said or did, but you still have time with her to make it up."

As he was about to stand up and start pacing around again, Matt's head shot up at the sound of footsteps coming towards the waiting room. In a matter of seconds he was on his feet and your mom was at the door with a small forced smile and wet cheeks, a nurse standing beside her.

''Miss Y/L/N is awake.'' the nurse said. "You can see her, but you all should know that she's showing signs of amnesia." everyone's face dropped as they took in the information. "We do not know whether it is permanent or temporary. She remembers her mother and her name but couldn't tell us today's date, whether it is day, month or year. I just want you all to be prepared in case she has a hard time remembering any of you, which could be a possibility." Everyone in the room nodded then started hugging each other to express a deep relief along with sorrow. After three days of constant fear and sleepless nights, you were awake. But then, there was the possibility of you not remembering them. Matt hugged your mom tightly before they all followed the nurse into your room. His heart started racing as he thought about all the things he wanted to say to you. He didn't think apologies would be enough.

He finally snapped out of his thoughts when he reached the door to your room, his heart aching at the sight of his girlfriend laying on a hospital bed.

You were slightly startled when the door to your room opened again, your nurse walking in along with a bunch of people you couldn't quite recognise as you struggled to keep your eyes open. Your entire body felt numb. You tried to sit further up, but your were immediately stopped by a striking pain coming from your ribs. You lifted your hand in an attempt to scratch your head but you were surprised to feel a bandage under your fingertips and see one wrapped around your wrist. Confused, you realized the upper part of your body was bandaged, but you couldn’t quite figure out why.

"Hello again, Y/N." your nurse smiled "Some people are here to see you. Could you tell me if you recognise any of them?"

Vision still blurry, you frowned and attempted to turn your head to the right. You let out a small groan, the movement triggering an ache.

"Take your time, there is no rush." the nurse says.

Then someone took a seat next to you and grabbed a hold of your hand that wasn't bandaged. You eventually managed to take a proper look at your surroundings, looking around yourself. Your mom was there, along with Javed.

"Um...well, there's mom again. And Javed." you spoke weakly. A small smile curved your lips when you saw him. You two had been friends since 6th grade. You then looked at the two boys behind him. "I don't think I know you." you spoke with a frown." James and Alex's faces dropped a little, but they were kind of expecting it. You weren't as close with them as you were with Javed, so you had fewer memories of them and more forgettable ones.

Then you met the other boy's eyes, the one sitting beside you.

You said nothing while staring at him before realising that he was holding onto your hand which you slowly pried away from him. Your brows furrowed as you looked at him. His nose, his hair, his lips. Then his eyes. You looked into them, trying to find any form of familiarity, but there was none. Why was he holding your hand?

"Y/N?" he says, his voice weak. You could tell he was fighting back tears. You frowned again, lips parting in confusion. You gave your mom a worried glance before looking back at him.

"I...I'm sorry but, am I supposed to know you?"

#blueeyeddean #matt

21 notes · View notes

tabloidtoc · 4 years

Text

Globe, November 9

You can buy a copy of this issue for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Prince Andrew fails lie detector -- new crisis rocks the palace

Page 2: Up Front & Personal -- Bruno Toniolo shirtless, Heidi Pratt at a pumpkin patch in L.A., Jacqueline Bisset catches some rays in L.A.

Page 3: Larry David leaves an L.A. office, Ellen Pompeo, Pete Wentz

Page 4: Kathie Lee Gifford is talking to NBC bigwigs about coming back to Today and they’re hot over the idea but Hoda Kotb is not pleased and Jenna Bush Hager is feeling threatened because Jenna never really grabbed the audience like Kathie Lee did, Martha Stewart and Gwyneth Paltrow are heading into the holidays trash-talking each other even more than usual and their pals have nowhere to hide -- they’re snippier than ever and can’t get through the week without saying something crass but the trouble is they have the same friends and they use some of the same chefs and caterers and crew -- all their friends in the Hamptons including the Seinfelds and Beyonce and Jay-Z and Billy Joel and Christie Brinkley and Rachael Ray are trying to keep out of it but it’s impossible because Martha and Gwyneth are both screaming for loyalty

Page 5: Legal hotshot and writer Jeffrey Toobin has been shelved by the New Yorker magazine for showing off his willie to co-workers during a Zoom conference call -- witnesses say Toobin was masturbating but he insists it was a blooper

Page 6: Dolly Parton was so lovestruck when she met Elvis Presley that she nearly chucked her marriage and career to shack up with Elvis -- Dolly is ready to tell all about Elvis after decades of protecting her husband Carl Dean and Elvis’ only child Lisa Marie Presley -- Dolly was in her late 20s and Elvis was in his late 30s when they had their sizzling encounter where she got dolled up to meet Elvis in a Nashville office and discuss working together and he wanted to do a duet but she didn’t trust herself to work with him and she didn’t even let Elvis do a cover of her song I Will Always Love You -- even though Dolly didn’t actually cheat on Carl she sure was tempted and she’s felt guilty about it ever since

Page 8: Just two weeks after splitting with his wife of 14 years former Home Improvement kid Zachery Ty Bryan was arrested and jailed on charges of trying to strangle a terrified galpal -- after a night of partying where he was photographed surrounded by four gals with an iced bottle of vodka at the table Zachery reportedly got into a heated clash with his galpal and she claims Zachery grabbed her by the throat and squeezed then tried to snatch her phone when she attempted to call 911 so she ran to a neighbor’s home where she hid while cops were called

Page 9: Distressed Kelly Clarkson and her two toddlers are in therapy to help cope with the anguish brought on by her divorce from Brandon Blackstock -- the talk show host is especially struggling because the split is playing out so publicly and the kids are seeing things about their mom on TV and she feels immense guilt about the divorce but knows it was the best decision because she wasn’t happy married to Brandon though she did try but staying in a marriage just for the kids wasn’t an option for her -- Kelly was deeply wounded when her father-in-law Narvel Blackstock’s management company recently sued her for $1.4 million in alleged unpaid commissions but she’s speaking with her ex privately in an effort to resolve the issue out of court but Kelly suspects he’s using it as a bargaining chip for a bigger settlement and also feels he’s using the kids against her as a weapon

Page 10: Showbiz legend Michelle Phillips has become a shut-in who sits home alone tippling wine while watching movies on TV and listening to her hits from The Mamas & the Papas where she is the last surviving member of the band -- she’s sad the rest are all gone and she’ll put on a record and sit in the dark; she misses them and so many other people -- she’s become a shut-in due to the pandemic and can’t bear for people to see her so old and haggard and overweight and all those years of partying have done their damage to her once-beautiful face -- she also hasn’t been able to see her young grandson and she’s grieving the loss of her longtime lover who died in 2017

Page 11: Baywatch hunk Jeremy Jackson’s cover girl ex-wife has been found homeless wandering California’s mean streets in worn and shabby clothes -- lost for two years Loni Willison is now virtually unrecognizable with missing teeth and her long blond tresses cropped short -- she was found pushing a grocery cart filled with her battered possessions in Venice -- despite her tragic situation she insists she’d doing fine and doesn’t want help despite reportedly having drug and mental health issues

Page 12: Celebrity Buzz -- Rita Ora in a see-through frock (picture), Lily James got caught brazenly canoodling with the very much married Dominic West who plays her father in the BBC miniseries The Pursuit of Love, just weeks after Cardi B filed to dissolve her marriage to Offset she’s put the split on hold and all it took was Offset to spend bucks on a heart-tugging Sunset Strip billboard and a Rolls-Royce and a Hermes Birkin bag, Kate Hudson’s getting loose-lipped about gross snotty smooches with her leading man Matthew McConaughey

Page 13: Vinny Guadagnino eating in Beverly Hills (picture), Kaitlyn Bristowe has a puffy trout pout (picture), Shia LaBeouf doesn’t let an apparent injury keep him from getting out and about in Pasadena (picture), Alanis Morissette says the fame that came with her 1995 revenge song You Oughta Know wasn’t so sweet but instead was an isolating experience

Page 14: Nicole Kidman is starring opposite Hugh Grant in the thriller series The Undoing but she really wanted to plays Hugh’s love interest in Notting Hill except she wasn’t well-known enough, Reba McEntire has landed herself a brand new TV show which is a modernized Fried Green Tomatoes drama series in which she’ll play the present-day Idgie Threadgoode, Fashion Verdict -- Regina King 8/10, Isabelle Huppert 2/10, Queen Maxima 5/10, Tracee Ellis Ross 9/10, Cher 4/10

Page 16: How John F. Kennedy stole the White House from Richard Nixon -- Chicago mob rigged the 1960 vote and cheated Nixon out of the presidency

Page 19: True Crime

Page 21: Parkinson’s patient Alan Alda is refusing to slow down at age 84 and friends fear the fragile M*A*S*H legend is headed for a devastating health crisis and he’s busier now than he ever was even during his sitcom days and he bravely says he lives with it by staying active but medication can only do so much and his friends and family including wife Arlene are worried he’s pushing himself too hard, teary-eyed Ringo Starr confesses his last conversation with dying Beatles bandmate George Harrison was heartbreaking and unforgettable -- Ringo wanted to stay with George until the end but his daughter Lee had been diagnosed with a brain tumor and Ringo had to rush to Boston to see her and when Ringo told George he had to go to Boston George said D’ya want me to come wit’ ya? so even on his death bed George made his best buddy smile while both faced unspeakable grief

Page 22: 10 Things You Don’t Know About S. Epatha Merkerson, Today show host Hoda Kotb reveals Frank Sinatra Jr. was the show’s worst guest because he clammed up instead of touting a book about his famous dad in 2015, Khloe Kardashian confesses she once worked as Nicole Richie’s personal assistant because she just needed a job and they went to school together -- Nicole’s reality career crashed in 2007 which was the same year Khloe’s series started

Page 24: Cover Story -- Disgraced Prince Andrew has flunked a lie detector test on his close relationship with murdered American pedophile Jeffrey Epstein and now the rogue royal insists he’ll never cooperate with the FBI for fear his testimony will land him behind bars but Queen Elizabeth’s favorite son has his back against the wall as new evidence surfaces on both sides of the Atlantic -- Andrew is terrified newly released secret testimony from Epstein’s accused madam Ghislaine Maxwell is just the tip of the iceberg of what she’s prepared to reveal and Maxwell’s revelations detailing her twisted sex life come on the heels of an explosive new British book accusing Andrew of attending debauched events with Epstein where teenage girls were parading around topless -- even though friends close to Andrew say he did nothing wrong and has no reason to fear the prince may not have a choice about spilling his guts because the fed-up royal family is threatening to cut off the cash-strapped rogue unless he plays ball

Page 25: Prince Andrew has been banished from the gift shop at his mother’s Balmoral Castle -- tourists can still purchase postcards her Her Majesty’s kids Prince Charles and Princess Anne and Prince Edward but Prince Andrew has disappeared which is a sure sign that Andrew is in the doghouse since items featuring Elizabeth’s beloved corgis are still up for sale

Page 26: Health Report

Page 27: Dirtiest places on planes exposed

Page 30: Serial sleaze Matt Lauer’s ready to pop the question to girlfriend Shamin Abas over the holidays and he hopes for a brighter future with her a year after his 20-year marriage to Annette Roque ended in divorce -- Matt showers Shamin her with gifts and wants to buy a house on the East Coast where they can make new memories and Matt’s hinted he’s already bought the ring and plans to propose by New Year’s and he hopes to have a celeb-studded wedding at their new home, Kathleen Turner will be back at Michael Douglas’ throat as his acid ex in The Kominsky Method to fill the hole left by Alan Arkin who abruptly pulled out of the third and final season of the show

Page 35: Matthew McConaughey’s father predicted he’d die while making love to his wife and he did, desperate to turn back time Marie Osmond is going whole hog on a head-to-toe makeover -- Marie is no stranger to cosmetic fixes and she is considering a slew of procedures to get a new look that’ll knock ‘em out including everything from Botox and fillers to face-lift to boob job and lipo-sculpting to enhance her waistline -- the makeover is motivated by revenge because she’s bitter over recently being pushed off her co-host gig on The Talk and now she’s counting on a younger look to land her a plum new TV gig

Page 38: Real Life Monsters

Page 39: Kris Jenner blames social media for ending the 14-year run of Keeping Up with the Kardashians because when the show started there was no Instagram or Snapchat or other social media platforms but now she gripes that now there are so many the viewer doesn’t have to wait three or four months to see an episode but instead information spreads online in real time, Phil Collins’ ex-wife has traded him in for a 31-year-old guitarist who never managed to make much noise in the music industry -- Phil was furious when he heard Orianne Cevey married Tom Bates in Las Vegas, Black Panther star Chadwick Boseman died without a will according to his widow -- Taylor Simone Ledward filed a probate case in L.A. asking a judge to name her administrator of Boseman’s estimated $938,500 estate with limited authority

Page 44: Straight Talk -- Bruce Willis and Demi Moore’s daughter Rumer Willis claims posing for raunchy bondage shots proves she’s a liberated woman free from sexual stereotypes but it’s not that simple

Page 45: Jeff Bridges is battling non-Hodgkin lymphoma which is a rampaging cancer that often spreads through the body to the liver and bone marrow and lungs -- while the cancer can be deadly experts say the five-year survival rate is 73 percent

6 notes · View notes

howaminotinthestrokesyet · 4 years

Text

Where Have They Gone Now: Axl Rose

Born William Bailey originally in Lafayette, Indiana in 1962. His mother was still in high school when she had him, while his juvenile delinquent father was 20 years old. They would divorce when he was two years old, which led his father William Rose abducting him and reportedly molesting the young boy. His mother remarried to a man named Steven Bailey, who was not much better than his birth father. Axl and his siblings were beaten on a regular basis and once again reportedly molested as well. Led by his stepfather, the Rose household was very strict religiously growing up in the Pentecostal faith. He was required to attend church 7 to 8 times a week, and even taught Sunday school on occasion. This seems to be in stark contrast to the Axl Rose we will see later. Axl would comment on his upbringing. “We'd have televisions one week, then my stepdad would throw them out because they were Satanic. I wasn't allowed to listen to music. Women were evil. Everything was evil." Music became a source of solace from an early age as he began singing in the church choir at the age of five. Rose began as a natural baritone, but decided to change his pitch consistently during practice just to anger the teacher. The future Guns N’ Roses lead singer also began to study piano at Jefferson High School, as well as participating in high school musicals. At the age of 17, Axl was going through some insurance papers when he discovered the existence of his biological father. At that time, he unofficially adopted his real father‘s last name of Rose, but told everyone he would not share a first name with him only referring to himself as W. Rose. After this discovery, the young man began to completely act out leading to at least 20 misdemeanor arrests from public intoxication to assault. Lafayette police were trying to charge him as a habitual criminal when he moved to LA in 1982 at the age of 20.

Almost immediately upon arrival, Rose joined the band Rapidfire with guitarist Kevin Lawrence. He had met him just outside the Troubadour in West Hollywood. They recorded a five song demo, but due to legal actions was not released until 2014. The EP was entitled Ready To Rumble. His next band included childhood friend and guitarist Izzy Stradlin, which they named Hollywood Rose. They recorded a demo featuring songs like “Shadow of Your Love,” “Anything Goes,” and “Reckless Life.” These songs would appear on various releases throughout the years including 2004’s, The Roots of Guns N’ Roses. The band would break up just after the hiring of Slash and Steven Adler. The biggest reason for this was that Rose decided to join LA Guns led by guitarist Tracii Guns. As he struggled for musical success, the young Axl continued to work to make any sort of money including night manager of Tower Records and even smoking cigarettes for a scientific study at UCLA with Izzy Stradlin. By 1985, Rose had restarted Hollywood Rose, so this band and LA Guns could merge their members. Guns N’ Roses was finally born, but almost immediately Tracii Guns and two other members left the band. Essentially, Guns N’ Roses became an expanded version of Hollywood Rose rather than any connection to LA Guns. They simply liked the name, so they kept it. Yet, there is absolutely no Guns in the band.

One thing to understand about Rose and his prima donna behavior that eventually led to the disintegration of the band was that every band in Los Angeles wanted him to be their lead singer in the mid-1980s. Axl had a certain buzz about the energy and intensity he brought every night on stage that could not be replicated. He represented the shining star of the Sunset Strip at that time; he could pick any group that was not signed to a record contract. The band would sign with Geffen Records in 1986, but one thing to note was that right before he changed his name officially to W. Axl Rose. The name originated when he was playing in a band called the Axls, so one of his bandmates suggested that he change his name to Axl. Rose thought it was a cool idea and never changed it. As the band began their sudden rise to the top of the music world, people began to realize that Rose was much different than any other singer before him. He began to single people out in the crowd, who were causing problems after two people died at the Monsters of Rock Festival in 1988. Most times previously singers would tell roadies to take care of it without publicly calling out anyone in the crowd. If you listen to their live compilation album, there are a couple of tracks where you can hear him actually doing this. Axl would say this in a 1992 interview. “Most performers would go to a security person in their organization, and it would just be done very quietly. I'll confront the person, stop the song: 'Guess what: You wasted your money, you get to leave.'" Upon the release of their EP Lies, Rose ran into quite a bit of controversy for his use of racial and homophobic slurs in the song, “One in a Million.” His explanation and defense of the use of the terms at the time was he meant it to be a joke about people that are a pain in your ass in your life. If that had occurred in our present times, he would have been canceled immediately. In 1992, the singer tried to explain the use of the lyrics once again relating some personal experiences he had with blacks and gays that had formed this negative connotation in his mind. For all the controversy, the group was dropped from a 1992 AIDS benefit show. By 1989, most rock writers had begun to see him as one of the top frontmen in rock and roll at the time. Rolling Stone had such respect for him as a singer that they allowed him to use his personal photographer for their story on him, instead of someone on their staff. During the recording of Use Your Illusion, Rose began to impose his will upon the band in a variety of ways. He forced the band to accept his friend Dizzy Reed as a keyboardist. Axl then wanted to fire their longtime manager Alan Nevin, which the band had to go along with because the singer threatened to not perform on the album if he was allowed to stay.

The Use Your Illusion tour began in May 1991 highlighted by concerts that started hours late, rants of his on stage, and even a riot in St. Louis. He tried to jump into the crowd during that show to take away a fan’s video camera, so after he got back on stage Rose quit the concert. Upon seeing an empty stage, the 25,000 people there started a riot. The damage bill came out to be just around $200,000. The friendships between the band members and Rose were gradually imploding throughout the tour. At one point, Axl demanded and received legal ownership of the Guns N’ Roses brand name. He had supposedly issued an ultimatum either give me legal ownership or I will not perform. Axl would later deny these reports saying the contract would not have been legally binding if he had done such a thing. Who knows what the truth is when it comes to this band sometimes? The singer helped to start another riot in Montreal at a concert co-headlined by Metallica. The heavy metal band had their concert cut short because pyrotechnics severely burned lead singer James Hetfield. Once again, Rose was nowhere near the venue to go on early coming on stage very late. The group needed to do an extensive set to make up for the short one by Metallica, but Rose cut his set short claiming voice problems. Once again, the fans rioted leading to some extensive fines directed towards the singer by Canadian authorities.

In 1994, the band released the covers album The Spaghetti Incident, which included a hidden track originally written by Charles Manson. Axl had intended the song to be a message to his ex-girlfriend Stephanie Seymour. The controversy that followed this song meant that the band needed to donate money for the son of one of the victims of those murders. In 1994, Rose also decided to terminate guitarist Gilby Clarke as a member of the band without consulting any of the other members. This decision was made so that Axl could bring in the controversial guitar replacement, Paul Tobias, which eventually led to Slash leaving the band. By 1997, the only original member of Guns N’ Roses was one Axl Rose. He had started to fade from any public view becoming essentially a rock and roll hermit. The media had dubbed him either Rock and Roll’s Greatest Recluse or the Howard Hughes of Rock and Roll. By the late 1990’s, rumors began to spread that Rose was forming a new lineup of Guns N’ Roses for an album entitled Chinese Democracy.

The absolute insanity that was Chinese Democracy took place from 2001 to 2011. The album would be officially released in 2008, but not after several starts and stops over and over again. A tour of the new album had been scheduled from 2001 to 2002, but almost all of the shows were either cut short or canceled because Rose was either a no-show or would quit very quickly. Finally, in 2006 and 2007, he actually toured as Guns N’ Roses promising new music. The concert offered very little in Chinese Democracy, but only concentrated on their hit songs. Around this time, he had changed his hair into cornrows, which got a laugh from music fans everywhere. One should note that Izzy Stradlin actually made a few guest appearances during that tour. Fans had hoped that a reunion collaboration might occur, but there was no such luck. Upon the release of Chinese Democracy, the singer did everything he could to sabotage any possible success the album might have overall. He refused to promote the album, would not return phone calls, or give interviews for three months after the release of the album. By the time he actually did say something about the album, the reclusive Rose complained that Interscope Records did not help them very much in promoting the album. In 2009, Axl and GNR went on a 2 1/2 year long tour, which included a headlining appearance at Rock in Rio 4. Around that time, he was sued by former band manager Irving Azhoff for $1.87 million. Of course, Axl countersued him claiming that he was forced to do a reunion tour because Azhoff had completely mismanaged the release, promotion, and tour of Chinese Democracy. In 2010, he sued Activision for their game Guitar Hero. Axl claimed that he had an oral agreement with the company that if “Welcome to the Jungle” was allowed on the game, then Slash nor any Velvet Revolver would not be included in any release of it. Not only was Slash’s music included in the game, but he ended up on the cover. A judge threw out the lawsuit in 2013 saying that Rose could not prove the oral agreement and the statute of limitations had run out anyway. In 2012, the Guns N’ Roses singer was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, but he declined to appear. In an open letter published on the Internet, Rose stated that due to the tensions between his former bandmates, he did not want to be where he was not wanted or respected. Yet, slowly but surely Guns N’ Roses began to tour with some of the original members culminating with the inclusion of Slash in 2016.

4 notes · View notes

shipsrulemylife · 6 years

Text

Jily Fic Rec

Surprise, surprise. Guess who’s back with another fic rec!

It’s Jily this time because who doesn’t love a good enemies to friends to lovers trope?

EDIT: apparently the links only work if you click on the read more??? why is tumblr so weird

Key Limes by cgner [Rated T]

In which Academy Award winner Lily Evans discovers the periphery of internet fandom and the mysteries of Prince James’s gold star system.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7402624

Mother Deer by GhostofBambi [Rated T]

Euphemia Potter is the unequivocal boss of everyone, including and most especially her son, and if the sweet, bright-eyed redhead who frequents her coffee shop doesn't know that yet, she's about to find out.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13594827

Polyjuiced by ladyoftheknightley [Rated T]

A very pregnant Lily invites the Marauders round to help her entertain James. Somehow, this degenerates into 4 Jameses wandering around her living room, with her having to guess which is her actual husband or (horror of horrors) lose a bet against Sirius Black.

https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10101206/1/Polyjuiced

Salmon Fishing in the Olympics by GhostofBambi [Rated T]

Modern Era AU: When Lily Evans seeks assistance from James Potter to avoid the attentions of a suitor who just won't take no for an answer, she accidentally lands them both on the front page of every gossip magazine in Britain. She should have thought about that before pretending to be the girlfriend of a famous athlete.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11393601

Cat in a Fifth Floor Flat by GhostofBambi [Rated T]

Modern Era AU. When Remus Lupin moves out and Lily Evans moves in, James Potter finds himself instantly drawn to his beautiful new neighbour. Little does he know that a mysterious force of nature is secretly pulling the strings.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/10610682

The Yeast I Can Do by elanev91 [Rated T]

Dr Lily Evans had an absolute shit day at work. Luckily, there's a bakery nearby that offers a course that she hopes will take her mind off of things.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11677191

Try, Trial, and Try Again by BeeDaily [Rated G]

Spell engineering has never been so complicated than when an afternoon of trying and trialing leaves James and Lily in an interesting position.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12404292

Supermarket Sweep by GhostofBambi [Rated T]

Modern Era AU: James Potter can find anything he needs in his local supermarket - bread, milk, the woman of his dreams - they've got it all.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11608353

we could be gigantic by elanev91 [Rated T]

Lily and James have been best friends since they were kids. Uni, a band, a trip abroad, a few tours and a couple of albums later, things start to change. Half an email fic, half a regular ol' narrative.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13926795

Swipe Right, Swing Left by ShadowRose997 [Rated T]

The unspoken rule of using dating apps in D.C. is that you always start with where you work. James Potter, it seems, never picked up on that one.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16743499

Erotic Porridge by elanev91 [Rated T]

Euphemia Potter thinks her doctor needs to go on a date with her son. This story is so named because I saw it somewhere, could not stop laughing, and my best friend professor-riddikulus hates it so much that I just had to. This story has nothing, literally nothing, to do with porridge. (I really should give my stories better names) - Muggle AU

https://archiveofourown.org/works/10475154/chapters/23112117

Elevator Love Song by BeeDaily [Rated T]

James unexpectedly finds himself trapped in a dodgy apartment elevator with Lily Evans.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13814355

Motionless by lovesickjily [Rated T]

James Potter always had thought that he was the only person in the world who had the power to stop time, but somehow, just the sight of Lily Evans makes every second feel like an hour.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16720791

Pickup Limes by elanev91 [Rated G]

Lily loves to blow off steam in Waitrose. Tonight, she spots an unbelievably gorgeous man in the bakery. Modern AU, Muggle AU, Grocery Store AU (still def not a thing)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11603553

Orange Cardamom by ShadowRose997 [Rated T]

James may not believe in love at first sight, but he's beginning to think there may be some merit in love at first sip.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16412123

Too Fic Too Furious by elanev91 [Rated T]

The M25 needs to undergo massive emergency repairs and the entire motorway has been shut down for, well, probably the rest of eternity. Lily Evans was foolish enough to think she could make it through before the traffic properly started. She's absolutely dying of boredom when she spots the guy in the car opposite.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/14990837

you exist behind my eyelids by lovesickjily [Rated T]

How could they be in love with someone whose existence was only known because they frequented each other's dreams?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15861750

the one with the white suit and the red beanie by Apalapucian [Not Rated]

james agrees(?) to be a model for lily's photography class project, and jeanne, james, and lily all fall one way or another in the duration of it.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16018502

Wishing you all a Good Evening by thejilyship [Rated T]

Lily Evans is a news anchor for her college news station and James Potter is a football star who has gained quite a bit of local notoriety. Lily's not impressed by him and his arrogance, but James is quite impressed with everything Lily does. After the blunder that was their first meeting, James is determined to change her mind and she's determined not to let him. College!AU

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15408027/chapters/35760174

So Just Act Like You Love Me by twilightstargazer [Rated T]

Lily was looking forward to a nice, quiet Christmas by herself. Instead she's heading back home for her sister's engagement party with a fake boyfriend in tow.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11616078

the one with the storm and all the texting by Apalapucian [Not Rated]

James and Lily get stuck in a coffee shop during a storm.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16044326

Unexpected Perks by thejilyship [Rated T]

James and Lily meet in an airport after missing their flights, though by the end of the day, it all sort of seems like fate.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15368979

Sing A Reckless Serenade by twilightstargazer [Rated T]

“What kind of work thing?” James asks, warily. Lily takes a breath. It seemed like a brilliant idea last night, when she was more than three drinks under, but now in the light of day it just seems… pathetic. Still though, she needs help, and needs it soon, so she finds herself blurting out: “I need you to fake date me for a week.”

https://archiveofourown.org/works/9794741

Dr. Jones and the Witch by jamespotterthefirst [Not Rated]

Who is the stranger Lily drunkenly met at a party? And why can't she stop texting him?

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16477184

no matter what (i love you) by softjily [Rated G]

When Lily’s aunt Rose introduced her to a scrawny twitchy eleven year old boy with frantic hair and glasses that were too big for his face, she certainly didn’t think she’d spend the next seventeen years beside him." Or, the VirtueMoir AU no one asked for.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16216460/chapters/37903337

Have a Biscuit by PetalsToFish [Rated G]

No matter how many biscuits it took, Minerva was too invested in James Potter's relationship with Lily Evans to tell him that he needed to stop eating all her biscuits.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16301453

The Engagement by itsa_bee [Not Rated]

Lily and Marlene decide to go wedding dress shopping, even though neither of them are even in a relationship much less engaged. One thing leads to another, James Potter enters the scene, some fake dating ensues, and then they eat an engagement cake!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15728991

Sixty-Nine, Nice by a_collection_of_nonsense [Rated T]

In which James Potter and Lily Evans are in a math course together and have absolutely no chill.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15663510

#Jily by Chie (Chierafied) [Rated G]

Twitter seemed awash with the hashtag Jily. Lily blinked at in confusion, until she realised it was one of those silly couple monikers people had bestowed on her and Potter. …Though there was a small dissenting crowd following a tweet from Potter’s bandmate Sirius Black: Jily? Hah! More like LAMES.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7292149

victorem by gryffindormischief [Rated T]

When God closes a door, sometimes you have to jump out a window.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/14134368

Cheers to That by wotcherpotter [Rated G]

Breakout star James Potter has seen success on the new hit comedy Have You Ever, and has been nominated for his first BAFTA. Upon the announcement he receives congratulations aplenty online, including from fellow actor and long time crush Lily Evans.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12185553

follow your heart gently; by lilevans [Rated G]

social media au + “after lily spotted james on campus, she posted a video to her university’s campus story, telling james: ‘To the cute guy wearing the blue jersey in the university’s snapchat story, I’m seriously in love with you. find me.’ a modern day cat and mouse game ensues with the whole campus urging romeo and juliet to meet because oMG its love at first sight!!”

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12130413

Questions and Answers by lizardcookie [Rated T]

The simple question of whether or not they're dating doesn't exactly have a simple answer. Seventh Year Jily.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7723105

Upside Down by Bob_The_Other_Zombie [Rated G]

Lily’s pop star career seems to be hitting a rut, until her publicity team comes up with the perfect plan- a fake relationship with James Potter, frontman of the hot new boyband The Marauders. Lily’s less than enthused- last time she and James were in the same room together, there was vomit involved, all over her nicest pair of shoes. After a few dates, however, lines begin to blur, and suddenly things between them don’t seem to be just PR anymore...

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7500300

Sweet Tooth by mylifeissocoollike [Rated T]

Lily and James were best friends growing up, but when he moved away and they drifted apart they thought that would be the end of their friendship. But fate has a funny way of working out, and Lily can’t keep herself away from the brownies in the grocery store.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7301335

Lilium Regale by jewishwondergirl [Rated G]

Flowershop!AU. Lily works in a flower shop, and every Friday James comes in to buy flowers. For this prompt: "you keep buying a bunch of flowers so i think i have no chance but it turns out theyre for ur mum" Written (early) for Jily Trope Fest! Nothing but fluff.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7065067

The Benefits of Recklessness by madnessandbrilliance [Rated T]

Some people really were lucky they had good medical insurance. A Jily AU.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/6779974

Darkest Night by thelittlegreennotebook [Rated G]

"It’s a tiny place, warm and welcoming with soft light and softer croissants. A place so small that if you happened to, say, run into the bloke you had been hell-bent on avoiding—well, there would be no avoiding about it." The third and last in a series of Jily college AUs for the November Fanfiction Challenge.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/2563049/chapters/5699597

Happy reading!

#oof #harry potter #harry potter fic rec #jily #jily fic rec #jily fanfic #jily fanfiction #fic rec #james potter #lily evans #lily potter #marauders

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ofgeneration · 5 years

Text

━ ✧ ( nico mirallegro, 26, he/him ) did you hear about generation’s new record ? it’s totally bitchin’ ! isaac carberry was killing it as lead vocalist. people who have interviewed him say they’re really quixotic & convivial, but they can be sort of impish & ungovernable if you catch him at a bad time. a mischievous grin, northern grit, your ex-record label’s offices looking like a jackson pollock after getting your revenge in the form of vandalism.

hello, my loves! — i’m jess, i’m 22 and over in rainy england. i’m recently done with university which gives me a lot of downtime until i find a job so hopefully i can dedicate a lot of that downtime to this fuckin’ rp because it’s gonna be lit i just know it. i’m a huge stone roses fan and 80s/90s-music-obsessed in general so getting to play this character is super exciting for me, so without further ado, meet my trash son: mr isaac carberry. PLEASE HMU FOR PLOTS!

BACKGROUND

born 14th april 1960 in manchester, england to a normal working-class family, isaac was the first born child of james & rose carberry, with a younger sister coming along a few years later. the little family of four lived fairly happily, but struggled financially just as many people did in northern england at the time.

when isaac was five, his father lost his job as a result of coalmine closures, and times were tough. however, the family kept their spirits high by keeping close-knit, as well as listening to a whole lotta’ music. music was key in the carberry household. it was all around you at all times.

when times would get particularly bleak, his dad would pick up an guitar and play to the kids. he wasn’t very good but watching someone play an instrument and have fun with it sparked something in the eyes of isaac carberry.

tw violence, corporal punishment — during his teenage years, he was a problem child. he was the kid that always got pulled out of class by the headmaster to receive the cane in his office. he could never sit still, was always cracking jokes when he should’ve been doing his schoolwork, etc. it wasn’t talked about at the time, so it went unnoticed, but what isaac was probably dealing with was undiagnosed ADHD. despite this, though, he was a clever child. he had a way with words and looked forward to english class every week, where he would take great pleasure in writing exercises, especially poetry.

writing was a dreamy, escapist haven for isaac, and this extended to his life outside of school, too. the works he was producing were mostly tongue-in-cheek, light-hearted stories and poems with a recurring “stop taking life so seriously” theme. when he turned 16, however, these poems began to turn into songs. this started to take up a lot of his time especially when he finished secondary school at 16 and went onto sixth form college, where he took music alongside english.

isaac desperately wanted to learn to play guitar, so that he could form some structural melodies to these songs, but struggled with honing the skill of learning an instrument. luckily, when he was 18, he made three friends who could do just that. the four kids would bounce ideas off of each other and hold jam sessions in the tiny little basement of isaac’s family home, but things never went much further than that (at least not yet, anyway.)

isaac decided against going to university, mostly since his family lacked the funds, and instead picked up a full-time job in a grocery store to help out his household’s shared income.

in 1979, margaret thatcher came into power as the UK’s prime minister, and times got even bleaker. money was even tighter and the working-class situation became an even harder one to be in. the carberry family started sending isaac out on the street after work to sing some of his songs for tips.

in 1983, aged 23, isaac was in a dark place. no opportunity, no degree, no wealth in the family to fall back on. he ‘rallied up the troops’ so to speak and practically begged his friends to start a band with him. he had plenty of material, after all.

to his relief, they said yes, and were determined to make it work. they were hungry for attention and throwing themselves at any gig opportunities they could get, to get them a bit of money into their pockets. that was it, GENERATION was truly alive and kicking.

at a show supporting another band, generation were noticed by a fellow musician, who took a shine to the band and booked them to support his upcoming uk tour. thus, the band were rising to prominence. fast forward a year and before isaac even had the chance to process it, generation were shaping up to be the biggest band in the uk. isaac could finally give his family everything they needed to better their situation and was having the most amazing time ever doing what he loved.

after independently releasing their own singles, the band got themselves a record deal in early 1985 and released their first full record, a self-titled album. their management wanted to introduce them to US audiences, and thus — that’s how we find ourselves here.

PERSONALITY

ok sorry for that LONG ass background here’s the nice lil fun part where we can just dick around lmao hey meet my baby boy chaotic aries who is a lovable mess and i will protect him at all costs

literally so much of his personality is inspired by myself lmao we love an aries legend with ADHD but also i owe some of his characterization to the stone roses’ ian brown so if you ever want a look into isaac, watch some interviews or smth because Big Isaac Mood. the last aesthetic in his app references this video

nice, but a fuckin firecracker of a man. intense boi!! he’s a Lot

on first impressions he’s cool and collected and laidback but when you get to know him he can be very exhausting to be around, talks a lot, never tires of energy, etc

has that lopsided, wonky grin that you can’t help but love

lowkey isn’t really overwhelmed by the fame at all, he’s kind of narcissistic in the fact that he??? just feels like it’s really deserved? he knows hes talented jfjhgfjkghf

lowkey maybe highkey a sweetheart

a favourite with the ladies but not good w commitment

has slept around a lot. ladies, fellas, you name it. probably has it in him to settle down someday since he likes the idea of falling in love, but just hasn’t found it as of yet

charisma literally oozes from him

tw drugs & alcohol / dOeSnT LiKe To sHoW eMoTioNs but then will literally cry w u and pour his heart out if you’re close enough to him or if he’s hella drunk or high on ecstasy

Reyt fokin’ northern accent, yeh get meh?

man i dont even know can i just post this dumb shit already because this is getting LONG

WANTED CONNECTIONS

ex-girlfriend / groupie — i have this as a wc on the main

best friends will prob be taken by his bandmates but at the time of writing this only one other spot is taken so maybe ill branch out

give me some ppl who just DONT fucking like him

hookups / ex-hookups

someone he can be a bad influence on

someone who is a bad influence on him

someone he’s had beef w in the industry, maybe they said some shit about his band in an interview or something

a slow burn love interest plot................. listen.... gimme the one person he’s falling for and would consider being tied down for. i’d be so soft for that

gimme anything and everything my babies

#1986.intro #FINALLY #i'm so sorry #me: wants interactions earlier bc im in the uk #also me: isnt ready to post my intro til 40 mins before it was originally supposed to open for ints #im a mess #also this is long sorry #forgive the graphics #they look low qual on the dash but i had to make them 350px bc of my theme!#HMU FOR THOSE PLOTS

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larriefails · 6 years

Note

It’s also the small things. Stuff like how they constantly hate on Harry, Jeff, HSHQ, the snowman, Elf or everyone really when Harry only just hangs out with Ben and / or James. If he’s out papped with them it’s worse. They all hate it, want to ‘free harry’ or don’t understand how and why he can be with such horrible people. Completely dismissing the fact that ALL the boys are friends with them. Niall being on the show and TWEETING about Ben & James too? No negative words, just love & support 🙄

I’m not the biggest fan of Ben and James because some of the things they’ve said are meh, but they’re not like, an issue... They’re normal people that have said stupid shit. Like most of us have in our lives. But like I said the other day, there’s this need to paint Harry’s situation as dire to match it to their perception of Louis’ situation, so they attack it from every angle they can. Harry is godfather to Ben’s daughter, like at one point you’ve got to stop. Nobody is forcing anything on Harry

The sitcom, my god, what a nightmare. They shat on it from beginning to end because Ben made one stupid joke about Harry bringing “A listers” back when he lived in his attic. They went on and on how it was reinforcing Harry’s “womanizer image” and how misogynistic it was gonna be. RIP it was none of it. Harry’s character doesn’t hook up with anyone, he has one ex girlfriend and that’s it. In one of the first episodes he brings a friend back from a party, introduces her as his friend, says they’re going to sleep, there’s no implication that anything other than sleeping is going to happen. No wink from the other characters, no “oooooh” from the audience, no smirk from Harry’s character.

I mean, there wouldn’t be an issue if that had happened. Harry isn’t a virgin and he’s certainly had sex with women. Anyone that hasn’t gathered that by now has some serious denial issues. There’s nothing wrong with sex at all.. On top of that, the character wasn’t even supposed to be actual Harry, it was just that his situation was inspired by him. But even with all those disclaimers, nothing actually did happen. This sitcom that was supposed to be super misogynistic and reinforce the idea that Harry can’t keep it in his pants (which is certainly not an idea that’s out there right now, btw, it hasn’t been in about six years now), in the end it did none of that. Harry’s character doesn’t even kiss anyone!

He and Ben’s character o to an NBA game and Harry’s character advises Ben’s character to look away so the media doesn’t try to say they were looking at the cheerleaders’ asses... That’s how non-misogynistic non-womanizer this sitcom was. And Larries still had a problem with it. They called it “shitcom” because they’re really clever with nicknames. They refused to watch it and still scoffed at the idea that it was on air. They cheered and celebrated when they thought it was being canceled (it wasn’t, it hasn’t been canceled as of now).

They said it “erased Louis from Harry’s history”... And that was the crux of it. That was their problem with it (that and that Harry’s character wasn’t gonna be a gold star gay UwU). Harry’s character wasn’t in a band, so he couldn’t have moved in with his bandmate prior to moving with his accountant. It was also a shitty storyline because in reality, Harry moved into Ben’s attic because the lease of Princess Manor was up. All of the members of 1D had to buy houses. Harry and Louis weren’t that close anymore and they both had enough money to afford their own mansions, so they bought their own mansions. It wasn’t funny or witty and it didn’t really allow for the flow of a pilot.

The biggest issue the Larries had with it (the only issue, really), was that they still cling to the idea that Harry never really moved in with Ben. That he and Louis have secret houses together all over the world and that Harry living in Ben’s attic was a cover up for why he was never at his London house. And they go on Larry Lore discourse on how Harry’s London house is so public and the window faces the street and there’s a GASP bus stop a few feet away and how fans camp outside. Blah blah blah. The problem with that? How do they explain that Harry has been living in his London house since moving out of Ben’s attic. Every time he’s in London he’s at that house. We have leaked pictures of him with his friends and his family at that house. Fans have met him outside that house. He goes jogging or to the gym blocks away from that house. He recorded a good chunk of HS1 in that house (because it has its own recording studio). Larries truly lose no matter where you look. Reality doesn’t favor them in anything. So what do they do? They throw tantrums, like spoiled children. They hate Ben and James because they “push narratives” (aka, acknowledge Harry’s actual life) and “use him” (aka, exist near him)

I really went on a tangent here for a little while, but I found myself in the end, I think

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atruththatyoudeny · 7 years

Text

Monthly Reads | August 2017

OMG! August was such a good month - I’ve read lots of amazing fics! Please make sure to also check out the fics under the cut! ❤ THANK YOU TO ALL WRITERS FOR YOUR HARD WORK AND FOR SHARING YOUR STORIES! ❤ Top 5 6 + 11 more under the cut:

Pray for some sweet simplicity

by delsicle | a/b/o | enemies to lovers | 237k Louis is the only omega to ever make it in the cut-throat world of competitive motorcycle racing—that is, he would be if anyone actually knew about his identity. Now, his sights are set towards competing in—and winning—the European Grand Prix, the biggest and most difficult race of the entire year, so he can disappear underground for good. He’s close enough, too, until an alpha sports journalist is assigned to follow Louis’s every move as he prepares for the event of his career. Or, an AU where motorcycle racing is the biggest sport in a heavily divided world, Louis is trying to take control of his own destiny, and Harry is in for more than he bargained for.

[*edited*]

Chasing Empty Spaces

by domesticharry | historical AU | 1930s | 79k The year is 1934 and Harry Styles was to inherent the largest tobacco firm in the south. His parents have picked out the “perfect” girl for him to marry and he has the privilege of receiving the highest education possible. The problem was, Harry hadn’t realized he didn’t actually want any part of that future until he met a mechanic named, Louis Tomlinson.

We’ll Be Seamless

by dinosaursmate for HL Fic Fest (2017) | Tumblr AU | pining | exhibitionism | voyeurism | 52k Green reblogged an old photo of himself. It was from back in October, a Halloween special. A pulse shot all the way through Louis because this photo was his absolute favourite, and it had taken the rest of the year for him to wean himself off of it. Green was on his knees, arms stretched out in front of him with his fingertips digging into the surface of his bed. He was wearing a pair of cat ears on his head, his curls falling forward. His back was arched, and in the foreground of the picture, Green’s bum was high in the air, a long, black cat tail sitting neatly between his cheeks. — Louis spends all his spare time scrolling arty nude blogs on Tumblr but amongst them all, Green is his favourite.

Given a Chance

by Fabby | Future Fic | canon compliant | slow burn | coming back together | anxiety attacks| 173k Five years after One Direction took their last tour, the last thing Louis Tomlinson ever expected to happen while on a tea run at the local Piggly Wiggly was to run into his ex-boyfriend and ex-bandmate Harry Styles. The odds of them ever running into each other again had to be super slim, right? Wrong. What happens when you mix ex-boyfriends with a large serving of Small Town America? Will Louis and Harry be able to set aside their differences, or will Louis be able to stay breezy as fuck in the wake of Harry’s arrival? (or, the one where Louis and Harry run into each other five years after One Direction ends and learn how to love each other again. Featuring: Reggie as the overweight labrador, Niall as Louis’ last grip on reality, and Nowheresville, North Carolina as the setting for Louis’ worst nightmare to come true.)

No sooner loved (series)

by benzos 1| As the winter to foul weather Trans character | mpreg | abortion | hurt/comfort | 45k AU. An unplanned pregnancy throws a spanner into Harry and Louis’ relationship. It wasn’t supposed to go like this. 2| You and you are sure together Trans character | eating disorder | hurt/comfort | 48k AU. The first day of fall term, Louis hits one of his residents in the face with a door. Later that day, said resident seeks refuge after a fight with his roommate. It becomes a thing. And then it becomes something else. 3| Baby, i’m speeding, and red lights are run pwp | 7k Louis really would’ve liked to just order the damn thing off the internet, but Harry insists that anything going inside your body ought to be thoroughly researched, which, apparently, mandates going to a sex shop. Knowing how ludicrously uncomfortable Louis is with the whole thing, Harry devises the ingenious solution of bringing Eleanor along and having her pose as Harry’s girlfriend who’s interested in trying out pegging, with Louis tagging along as a supportive best mate. It’s not Harry’s worst plan to date, but it’s somewhere in that range.

Under me, you

by hazzafrazza | friends to lovers | superheroes | 12 k You Won’t Believe Who Was Spotted Leaving Harry Styles’ Primrose Hill Pad! If Harry was being completely honest, it probably wasn’t the best idea to be a world-renowned popstar and an infamous vigilante. (Especially when all the comic books said never reveal your secret identity to keep your loved ones safe – which was all well and good, until Louis.) Or: Harry wants a lot of things – fame, glory, Louis – but that last one is particularly hard to get when everyone thinks you’re dating your secret superhero alter-ego and suddenly you’ve become your own worst cockblock.

Such Good Luck

by casuallyhl for HL Mpreg Fic Exchange | Historical AU | 1910s | mpreg | secret relationship | class difference | 66k Louis smiles at Harry’s words, leaning into his touch. “Tell me again.” Smiling, Harry takes Louis into his arms. Pressing gentle kisses to his face, Harry murmurs, “In six months’ time, I will have my twenty-fifth birthday. On that day, my portion of the inheritance will become legally mine. And I plan that very day to announce to my family that I have found love.” Harry chuckles as he runs his lips lightly along Louis’ cheekbone. “That, in fact, I found love when I was twenty-one years old, and that I have loved and been loved every day since.” Or, an Edwardian AU where Harry is a young aristocratic lord and Louis is a working class dairy farmer. Secrets are a necessary part of their relationship, but Louis has one that could topple their whole world.

What A Life I’d Have Missed

by harioandlouigi for HL Mpreg Fic Exchange | mpreg | established relationship | 27k It all started with a prank, tears, and guilt. Louis has been pranking Harry since the day they met. Now, seven years later, Harry has finally come up with the perfect plan to prank his husband back. He has a borrowed positive pregnancy test in front of him, he’s perfected his facial expression, and he’s dead sure Louis will fall for it. He doesn’t exactly get the panicked reaction he expected, though. As a matter of fact, nothing ever seems to turn out the way he expects it to, but that’s for the best, really. Or, the one where an insensitive joke soon becomes a very real, happy pregnancy.

Small Doses (Loving You It’s Explosive)

by Anonymous for HL Summer Exchange 2017 | personal trainer Harry | boxing | dom/sub undertones | 38k Louis Tomlinson finds himself at Vitality Fitness to try and turn his life around after having left his cheating boyfriend of four years. The gym’s owner, Liam, quickly becomes a good friend, but his right hand man is rude and dismissive from the get-go. Louis and Harry continue to clash all while Harry is trying to move his way up the ranks in Manchester’s amateur boxing circuit, but they can’t seem to stay away from each other.

Sound Like a Song

by allwaswell16 for HL Fic Fest (2017) | 14k In high school, Louis Tomlinson lit up Harry’s world like nobody else, even if Harry did most of his pining from the safety of his tightly knit circle of friends. Ten years later, Harry is ready to make some changes. He’s tired of having so many regrets and not taking charge of his life, and he still hasn’t forgotten how brightly Louis shines. He’s about to get a long awaited second chance. Or the one where Harry helps out at a farmer’s market and gives Louis free vegetables.

Take Me Back to Where We Started

by amory | exes to lovers | famous/non-famous | 27k Harry and Louis haven’t spoken since they broke up four years ago. As boarding school sweethearts they once spent every waking moment together, but now they can hardly stand to be in the same room. When their five year class reunion comes around, both boys decide against their better judgement to return and (hopefully) have a good time. The only problem is, they’re both still hopelessly in love. Starring Harry as the petty ex, Louis as the new James Bond, Niall as a boy genius and fake boyfriend extraordinaire, and Liam and Zayn as two friends just trying to make it out of this weekend alive.

Tightrope

by Anonymous for HL Mpreg Fic Exchange | mpreg | exes | friends to lovers | 33k Louis knows he and Harry are going to be together for the rest of their lives and one day they were going to get married and have three point five children, a dog, and two cats. But life hasn’t matched up perfectly yet and that time is not now. So they are both happy to be best friends and casually date other people until life decides they really should get their shit together. aka Louis gets pregnant from “one last time” sex and he and Harry somehow think they’ll be able co-parent without it being weird for anyone (most especially their new boyfriends).

Souls; Plural, Parallel

by Anonymous for HL Mpreg Fic Exchange | mpreg | soulmates | 19k Soulmates are rare, the sort of rare that means everyone has a story about a friend’s sister’s coworker or a brother’s roommate’s cousin. But the fact of the matter is that most people never meet theirs. It’s unfortunate then, that Louis finds out the hard way that he met his soulmate in a club, and the guy never texted him back.

Friend Request

by Anonymous for HL Summer Exchange 2017 | 11k This was written for Kassio as a pinch hit for the HL Summer Exchange, from the prompt: “ Louis is bored on Facebook and in the “People you may know” suggestions, he sees the name Harry Styles. The profile picture doesn’t show the person. He thinks it’s an old family friend who he misses – maybe a middle-aged or elderly former neighbor or babysitter who he was fond of as a child - and sends a friend request. Turns out it’s not old man Harry from their old neighborhood, it’s hot young Harry (who he’s never met before) who accepts his friend request…”

If the Surface Begs You Home

by Anonymous for HL Mpreg Fic Exchange | mpreg | mermaid!Harry | 17k Harry is a mermaid from the underwater kingdom of Mercadia who is a little too fascinated by life above the surface. He’s kicked out of his home after he winds up pregnant, and has to figure out how to make his way in the world. Louis is the darling of the small neighbouring seaside village who came home after university to take over their local library, and can’t seem to stay away from the mysterious pregnant mermaid his friends introduce him to.

Out of the blue corner

by fallingaway | boxing | slow burn 85k Louis is a boxer banned because of doping. Harry is a journalist following the story. * * * “It seemed like a normal morning, but he had a feeling it was the quiet before the storm. And by storm, he meant getting involved in Louis Tomlinson’s life.”

#pray for some sweet simplicity #chasing empty spaces #we'll be seamless #given a chance #no sooner loved #hl mpreg fic exchange #hl summer exchange 2017 #hl fic fest 2017 #fic rec #monthly reads #my fic rec #pairing: larry #completed fics #my reads

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bobbystompy · 5 years

Text

My Top 75 Songs Of 2019

Previously: 2018, 2017, 2016, 2015, 2014, 2013, 2012, 2011

First time going below 100 songs since 2015, and I cannot wait. Giving this extra juice already.

As always, criteria and info:

This is a list of what I personally like, not ones I’m saying are the “best” from the year; more subjective than objective

No artist is featured more than once

If it comes down to choosing between two songs, I try to give more weight to a single or featured track

Each song on the list is linked in the title if you wanna check them out for yourself; there is also a Spotify playlist at the bottom that includes the majority of the songs

This is usually the part where I put up a pump up video, but we are going with something a little different this year.

youtube

(It was stuck my head. Blame Blink-155.)

75) YG - “In The Dark”

The video begins with YG chugging a full tequila bottle -- sure. This song is very bad. It’s like he’s in a competition to make the verse lyrics worse than the chorus lyrics (spoiler alert: the verses “win”); not even satanic imagery can save this.

74) Solange - “Stay Flo”

Here’s a weird take: wouldn’t Solange’s career be way more fun if everyone slept on her? Instead, it’s hype on hype -- plus being Beyoncé’s sister -- which makes it nearly impossible to deliver. This has a fun beat/vibe but is kinda boring... and was still easily my favorite off her album.

73) Art Alexakis - “The Hot Water Test”

My doctors told me that I had a disease / I will slowly fall apart until there’s nothing left that looks like me

This song makes the stakes clear immediately. It was released a few months after I saw Art play in June 2019 on my birthday. At the intimate show, he revealed his multiple sclerosis diagnosis as if we were all his closest friends. Something like this is never easy to deal with -- a similar announcement by the Lucky Boys Confusion singer did not help matters -- but music can help such a painful situation, and it’s clearly Alexakis’ exile here.

72) The Cranberries - “In The End”

A very suitable sendoff for the band following the passing of singer Dolores O’Riordan. The recording story (via NPR):

O'Riordan died suddenly in January 2018 at 46 years old and left behind the vocal tracks to what was intended to be the band's latest album. Now, O'Riordan's bandmates have decided to complete that album, In The End — the last album the band will release — in her memory.

[...]

In June 2017, O'Riordan and Hogan started emailing album ideas and demos back and forth to each other. O'Riordan had been very open about her struggles with mental health and addiction, which would affect the band at times, but they wanted to make a new album. Hogan says that when they were emailing those demos, she was in a good place. They started laying down her demos.

"All of that was kind of behind her," Hogan says. "She's kind of found a way to cope with the mental health thing. That's why she wanted to write so much. That's what she kept saying, 'I have so much to say, I just need the music to put it to.' "

Hogan says O'Riordan's apparent stability is what made her death even more tragic and devastating. (Officials ruled O'Riordan's cause of death to be accidental drowning due to alcohol intoxication.) But after a period of mourning, the remaining band members remembered they still had O'Riordan's demos. As Hogan remembers, they finally had the courage to start listening to them again in late February and, with her family's permission, started recording in April. "We spoke to her family and said, 'Look, how do you feel about us finishing the album?' And they were really supportive," Lawler says. "They were delighted, actually. They gave us their blessing."

Hogan says, in a sense, they were used to O'Riordan not being in the studio when they recorded — "Dolores hated hanging around the studio once we worked on our parts" — but, of course, this time was different.

71) Raleigh Ritchie - “Time In A Tree”

Exercise time. Play the first minute or so of this song without looking at any YouTube visuals.

/waits for you

OK, who are you picturing singing this? Got your image?

Well, whatever it was, you’re wrong -- it’s GREY WORM HIMSELF.

This was the best thing about “Game of Thrones” in 2019, sadly.

70) Culture Abuse - “Goo”

Simple, effective, gets out before you can dislike much.

69) Lil Pump f/ Lil Wayne - “Be Like Me”

Sometimes, a song starts, and you can just tell it’s going to be ignorant. Even before the vocals kick in. This was probably our moment here:

Between that and the beat, it’s like the only thing you can think is “Ohhhh, he’s about to say some horrible things about women.”

Other choice lines:

- “Yes, I’m hella ignorant, I don’t give a fuck” (he even says it in the song)

- “I take drugs like it’s Vitamin C / I’m a millionaire, but I don’t know how to read”

This song almost feels like it existed already.

68) The Get Up Kids - “Satellite”

Finally, our first rock song with some punch. This probably takes the crown from both DMB and P.O.D.

67) Bad Religion - “My Sanity”

BR is historically my favorite band, so it is rather deflating to see them so far back on this list. That said, it is Year 40 (!!!) of their existence, so some can be forgiven. Yet... we’ve never needed them more, you know? It’s this weird mixture of resentment but understanding.

66) Billy Liar - “The Righteous & The Rats”

Gonna see him (them?) open for The Bombpops in March; looks quite promising. Has an old school Brit punk feel.

65) Beach Slang - “AAA”

Beach Slang never lets you forget they love -- no, like, LOVE -- The Replacements. When this cover dropped, I googled “replacements AAA”, and, surprisingly, nothing came up.

Ohhh, what I fool I was. After more digging, I discovered a band called Grandpaboy who performed “AAA”.

“Oh, damn -- he finally went outside the box with this pick.”

No. Grandpaboy is fronted by Paul Westerberg. Singer of, you guessed it, The Replacements.

James Alex wears his heart on his sleeve so hard, he might as well give the heart a little jacket so his heart can wear its own heart on its sleeve.

HE DID THAT TOO?!

You can’t even make jokes about this band; they live in the jokes with their damn earnestness.

64) Gesaffelstein & The Weeknd - “Lost In The Fire”

Even lesser known Weeknd-involved tracks sound like they could lead a soundtrack or close out a festival. Are you familiar with this one at all? It has 87 million views on YouTube. Abel is never not not playing.

63) FIDLAR - “By Myself”

Started from the bottom and I’m still at the bottom

Falling apart never felt so carefree and burdenless.

62) Constant Elevation - “Fuck Runnin”

As hardcore punk as this list is gonna get. All glory to Vinnie Caruana. Though none of his solo tracks from 2019 made it, this has an undeniable energy and confidence. Plus probably the best song title of the year.

61) Maren Morris f/ Brandi Carlile - “Common”

A focused duet that drills into relationship dynamics before throwing a personal theology wrench in the middle of the chorus.

60) Anti-Flag - “Christian Nationalist”

AF going in on the white, religious right. This is like throwing a 50 mph pitch to -- /looks up good baseball players -- Pete Alonso.

59) Cokie The Clown - “Punk Rock Saved My Life”

This is less of a song and more of a confessional essay, and it gets harder and harder to look away with every revealing detail. If NOFX’s Fat Mike needed this character as a vehicle to get all of these autobiographical details off his chest, hopefully it’s a helpful therapy.

58) White Reaper - “Might Be Right”

“Judy French” is such an untoppable song, but “Might Be Right” has a similar dynamic.

57) Denzel Curry - “RICKY”

Denzel Curry as a rap moniker is such a slam dunk.

/looks up actual name

!!!

56) Ariana Grande - “break up with your girlfriend, i’m bored”

It takes a special kind of hot girl twisted to issue this unflinching request while totally pulling it off.

55) Goody Grace f/ blink-182 - “Scumbag”

Not sure if Goody is a Soundcloud rapper, punk rocker, or some kinda emo hybrid of both.

A few asides:

- Have we ever -- ever -- heard Travis Barker this subdued on drums?

- On the Blink-155 podcast, Goody said he gave Tom from the Plain White T’s a songwriting credit because he unintentionally lifted some melodies from “Hey There Delilah”, but... I really don’t hear it at all; like, it sounds maybe in the same key but not much else?

54) Jonas Brothers - “Sucker”

Despite their popularity in the past, I do not think I could name a single JoBros song. That changed in 2019 with this poppy, light, clappy, Maroon 5-style single.

53) Goo Goo Dolls - “Money, Fame & Fortune”

Someone -- coulda sworn it was Brendan Kelly -- said this was Goo Goo Dolls sounding like Fake Problems, and that is spot on.

52) AJJ - “A Poem”

A poem is song that no one cares about

This short, folky tune led to one of my favorite Twitter exchanges of the year, when I reached out to a music journalist with a question and AJJ came flying off the top rope.

51) DaBaby - “Suge”

This song is fun, but I really don’t get it. Beat is cool, flow is fine... this is the new face of hip-hop? His name is DaBaby! What are we doing here?!

50) Laura Stevenson - “Jesus, Etc.”

Taking a classic and doing it full justice/adding some harmonies.

49) blink-182 - “Not Another Christmas Song”

Blink’s 2019 album “Nine” was very, very bad because it tried too hard and was not good. This song, released later in the year, takes an opposite approach and actually works. We get lyrics that are discontent, even clumsy at times -- the “I miss fucking in the rain” line is so out of place/cringe-y but actually feels real and not workshopped by 10 producers. The trio can hopefully use this better b-side to figure out the best songwriting should flow out of you without having to go through multiple stations on a conveyor belt first.

48) Dave Hause - “Eye Aye I”

This song has a lot I love (catchy chorus, wistful thoughts, hairline analyses) and a lot I don’t (genuine use of the word “old bores”, Van Halen getting respect), but one thing is clear: Dave Hause is in complete control.

47) Beck - “Up All Night”

I’ve casually followed Beck’s entire career and would not have guessed this was him if given 100 chances. As an exercise, I’m going to pull up the 2020 Coachella lineup and randomly point to an artist.

/pulls up lineup and points

I got Daniel Caesar. If you told me this was Daniel Caesar, that would probably make more sense here.

46) Shawn Mendes - “If I Can’t Have You”

Randomly came into Shawn Mendes tickets in 2019, and good gracious, that was something. Other than parents, we were the oldest people there by a lot. Getting to watch thousands of teens and preteens legitimately having the best moment of their lives was downright inspiring. When you’re that young, it’s not even hyperbole. Phones were flagrantly out; I’m talking 20+ minutes of straight video being filmed. I wanted to judge so badly, but if you gave me an iPhone at my first concert when I was 14, who the hell knows how egregious my behavior would’ve been. As fun as the whole experience was, I never wanted to be in a grimy punk club more. Sometimes, leaving your comfort zone makes you appreciate your home base more.

This is a rock solid pop song, but there are way too many you/you rhymes to not penalize it some.

45) Big Thief - “Cattails”

The whitest song you will ever hear that isn’t written by Vampire Weekend.

44) Bayside - “Prayers”

Bayside went super metal with their 2019 release “Interrobang” (such a sick name). So yes, the guitars are a touch harder than you might be used to, but the chorus soars; a great hook transcends genre.

43) Naughty Boy & Mike Posner - “Live Before I Die”

Few had as interesting of a year as Mike Posner. Following a breakup, the death of his father, and the death of Avicii, he decided to walk across the United States of America. He legit became Forrest Gump, right down to the beard and grown out hair.

In the video, you can see how a snakebite hospitalized him and almost derailed the whole trek. After a rehabilitation period where he almost lost his leg, our man finally makes it to the Pacific Ocean. If nothing else, watch for the ending -- it’s exhilarating.

42) Post Malone - “Wow.”

Post is flexing in this one; we’ve got slow motion jamming with the Red Hot Chili Peppers, international flights, a dancing beard guy, and a Fall Out Boy name check which really makes them sound cooler than they are now.

41) Bryce Vine f/ YG - “La La Land”

Sometimes, these summertime Cali songs write themselves. That is until YG comes in and flips over the board before you can finish the game. By the time the Coachella reference is dropped when Bryce comes back in, you realize 1:47 may have actually been a better endpoint for the song than its 2:47 length.

40) David Rokos - “Backseat Drives”

It’s winter in Chicago, again and until forever. If you haven’t been to the Jewel in the South Loop or Marshall Field’s before they changed it, just listen to this so you don’t actually have to.

39) Simple Creatures - “Drug”

Mark Hoppus and the dude from All Time Low give us this synth-pop bop that feels like the duo shooting their shot at a real mainstream pop hits. It didn’t quite get there, but they should feel OK about where it landed.

38) Chris Cresswell - “To The Wind”

My interest in The Flatliners ramped up considerably in 2019, as their near decade old record “Cavalcade” got plenty of spins (peep “Filthy Habits”; just stunningly incredible punk). Though they did not release anything this year, their singer put out “To The Wind”, a longing song about missing someone.

37) Kesha f/ Big Freedia - “Raising Hell”

Kesha, with the help of New Orleans’ Big Freedia, gives us another one. I’ve personally dug Kesha for a while now, but when is it time for us as a society to put her into the all-time conversation for pop artists? She has at least, like, seven HOF certifiable bangers. Plus she kills a guy in this music video.

In conclusion, I think this could translate to a country song very easily.

36) No Lenox - “Marquee”

Illinois/Japan’s No Lenox are back with Reuben Baird on the mixer and legendary masterer Collin Jordan (of The Boiler Room) on the, well, master, and the fullness in sound leads to the assault that is the “I saw your name on the marquee / Your friends were milling around outside” part. They only play it once, but I really could’ve gone for closer to five.

35) Red City Radio - “Love A Liar”

Rapid fire Red City Radio gets this one done in exactly 120 seconds.

34) Barely March - “Lead Single”

This sounds like Joyce Manor turned up to a 17 out of 10 before unexpectedly turning into a hellogoodbye song.

33) New Lenox - “Old Words”

Not a typo from two songs ago -- legitimately a different band. This one was written by your boy. The first 15 seconds were from a demo recorded 1/2/16 before developing the rest in 2019 (after some encouragement). We have Dave Rokos on guitar/bass, Dave Hernandez on hums, and Brian Bedford on some very temporary sleigh bells. Themes: online dating, resolutions, exes, currents, Black Wednesday, hope, and Carly Rae Jepsen stage banter.

32) MakeWar - “Sails”

Honey, I can’t make it on my own

You might get some Gaslight Anthem vibes as the vocals come in, but by the time the song ends, MakeWar leaves their own imprint on this impassioned ballad.

31) Sheryl Crow & Johnny Cash - “Redemption Day”

Was gonna say Johnny’s voice could move mountains before realizing no, Johnny’s voice is the mountains.

30) American Football f/ Hayley Williams - “Uncomfortably Numb”

Sensitivity deprived I can't feel a thing inside I blamed my father in my youth Now as a father, I blame the booze

An unlikely collaboration that makes you forget about its unlikeliness by the two minute mark. The two voices trade spots, mesh, harmonize, and weave throughout this beautiful song.

Asides:

- Blake from “Workaholics” in the video?!

- Choose to interpret this song’s title as a Pink Floyd diss

- “I’ll make new friends in the ambulance” should be a 2005-level emo lyric that we all mock, yet it’s somehow one of the most stunningly appropriate closers of the entire year

- I wish my friend Luke was with us to hear it

29) Stuck Out Here - “Embarrass You”

Stuck Out Here got onto my radar with 2014′s amazingly named “Getting Used To Feeling Like Shit”. Five years later, they’re back -- and not feeling much better. The Toronto quartet’s Bandcamp describes the song like this:

They’re fucking up, but unlike previous releases, they’re finally holding themselves accountable.

You can even kinda hear their Canadian accents in the “I’m sorry I embarrass you...” part.

28) The Weeknd - “Heartless”

The Weeknd will be on these lists as long as he continues to make music even 1/8th as good as this.

27) The Chainsmokers f/ blink-182 - “P.S. I Hope You’re Happy”

A simple song that’s a touch more clever than you first realize. The Chainsmokers guy is giving me some real Owl City vibes. Also, how airtight of an apology is the line “I blame myself for when I was someone else”. It’s like the modern way of saying “When I was a child, I spoke like a child”.

Also also, the “I will find a way somehow...” harmony in the pre-chorus is as pretty as music got in 2019. The Chainsmokers are so sonically pleasing, whether you end up liking the music or not.

26) Vampire Weekend - “Harmony Hall”

ooooooooh, that crisp guitar in the intro

25) Alex Lahey - “Don’t Be So Hard On Yourself”

If Carly Rae Jepsen can get a sword, why can’t Alex Lahey get a god damn saxophone? HIT ME.

That solo, combined with the “Mighty Ducks” reference in the chorus, make this song untouchable.

24) Lizzo - “Truth Hurts”

Let’s be clear: this did drop in 2017 but was technically re-released in 2019, so it does qualify for our list despite the criteria threatening timeline. Anyway.

The walking piano part, the iconic intro line (with a lawsuit!), the Minnesota Vikings reference (causing a Green Bay radio edit), and all of the damn positivity. Lizzo was among music’s big winners this year, and her success made you wonder how the hell someone this talented was slept on for those two years.

Let’s end with the purse.

23) An Horse - “Ship Of Fools”

Awkward band name, but a song that makes you pay attention. Kinda like Tegan and Sara, had they stayed more rock. So much urgency in the vocals and lyrics.

22) Charli XCX f/ Lizzo - “Blame It On Your Love”

Trippy vid; Charli continues to give us anthems. Wasn’t super high on the Lizzo cameo, but it somehow made more sense in the context of said video.

21) Sincere Engineer - “Dragged Across The Finish Line”

Sincere Engineer is back -- you can tell from the second those guitar leads get goin’. Drums from 1:19 to 1:36 = /heart eyes emoji. My buddy Cox said his next tattoo very well could be the outro lyric “Too dumb to succeed, too honest to cheat”.

(Bonus fact: they did a beer collaboration/show with Pollyanna Brewing Company in 2019.)

20) Lil Nas X - “Old Town Road”

Was unwilling to listen when this first dropped solely because of how horrible Lil Nas X’s name is (”What if a rapper came out named ‘Lil Jay-Z X’?!”)... what a foolish notion. One billion streams and a Billy Cyrus cameo later, I wouldn’t have been able to miss out on the Song of the Summer (and year) if I tried. More notes:

- Picked this because I had to, but “Panini” is legit good (200+ million streams)

- Went with the original (sorry, Billy), which is a beautiful 1:53 long (brevity, brevity, brevity)

- Did you know: Lil Nas X uses a Nine Inch Nails sample on the beat? This Rolling Stone interview with Trent Reznor is super interesting

Reznor calls “Old Town Road” “undeniably hooky,” but once it exploded, he took a back seat to the phenomenon. “The reason I haven’t stepped in to comment anything about it is, I don’t feel it’s my place to play any kind of social critic to that,” he says. “It was a material that was used in a significant way and it turned into something that became something else, and those guys should be the ones the spotlight is on…. They asked if I wanted to do a cameo in the video, and it was flattering, and I don’t mean to be disrespectful, but I don’t feel like it’s my place to shine a light on me for that. I say that with complete respect.”

Still, Reznor is amazed at how the song became a juggernaut. “Having been listed on the credits of the all-time, Number One whatever-the-fuck-it-is wasn’t something…I didn’t see that one coming,” he says. “But the world is full of weird things that happen like that. It’s flattering. But I don’t feel it’s for me to step in there and pat myself on the back for that.”

19) Gryffin & Carly Rae Jepsen - “OMG”

What doesn’t this little bop have? It’s kinda Chainsmoker-y and tingles like cool breath hitting the back of your neck.

18) Craig Finn - “Blankets”

You travel your whole life just to get out to the place you’re gonna die

I love everything about this song: the artwork, the intro, the climax, the command Craig Finn has from start to finish -- with such a payoff. Now several albums in, the greatest compliment we can give is that his solo stuff now feels more essential than Hold Steady releases*. You can even hear it in this line: “When we got to the Twin Cities / I said ‘Man, I know some songs about this place’”. Another life.

17) Carly Rae Jepsen - “Now That I Found You”

Carly always keeps us in the sky; picking one song was difficult because the album is even more fulfilling as you get to put the pieces together.

16) Billie Eilish - “Bad Guy”

Different genres*, but Billie Eilish lived up to her hype in the exact same way Lana Del Rey did in the earlier part of the decade. Lana said she was the gangster Nancy Sinatra and totally fucking was. Billie feels like something potentially even bigger. Nearly everything about her aura lets you project (or even second guess, if you’re a skeptic). Is she dead-eyed because she’s high or disaffected? Or just Aubrey Plaza? Is it her or her brother that’s pulling the strings? How can someone so young be so good already? In the skinny fashion era of All Achilles Everything, how is she rocking such loose fits?

“I never want the world to know everything about me. I mean that’s why I wear big baggy clothes,” she said. “Nobody can have an opinion because they haven’t seen what’s underneath.”

“Nobody can be like ‘Oh, she’s slim-thick, she’s not slim-thick, she’s got a flat ass, she’s got a fat ass,’” she continued. “No one can say any of that because they don’t know.”

It almost seems too easy, but how much sense does that make to you?

Great jokes aside, I have so much anticipation for what’s next, with assured belief in its potential. Pitchfork:

In 10 years, she will still be well under 30. Let’s hope the planet survives that long.

Yes.

(* - though not totally)

15) Ben Gibbard - “Filler”

Before you check Gibbard’s, please listen to the original by Minor Threat. That’s what he had to work with. From there, a total transformation while doing the near impossible -- keeping its beating heart.

14) Martha - “Wrestlemania VIII”

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Third favorite song title of the year/favorite music video of the year. This is energetic, bratty punk at its finest; also surprised to find out it was British, but, based on the upcoming tour dates and YouTube description...

This is a silly & frankly quite rubbish video but when you are a band trapped within surveillance capitalism's endless hunger for content trying to promote a tour sometimes things will be a silly & frankly quite rubbish.

I love them. Seriously didn’t even notice the accents in the singing until I knew to look for them; now, it’s all I can hear. Also, the part in the video where they finally show someone with an instrument, only he stops playing guitar halfway into the solo (/crying emoji).

THEY SAY ABSENCE MAKES THE HEART GROW FONDA

13) Chance The Rapper f/ Ben Gibbard - “Do You Remember”

Chance The Rapper dropped a one hour and 17 minute album in 2019 because he is a monster. I could not name three songs on it, but this one stood out big. It’s Chano doing what he does best: reminiscing and evoking summer in his city. Gibbard on the hook gives it that 2005 nostalgia while also making you say “Damn, it’s been nearly 15 years since 2005?!”

Fav two lines:

1) “Used to have obsession with the ‘27 Club’ / Now I'm turning 27, wanna make it to the 2070 club / Put the 27's down, Lord, give me a clean lung / Took the ring up out the box, I know this ain't no brief love”

2) “That summer left a couple tan lines / I love my city, they let me cut the line on the Dan Ryan”

(If you know, you know.)

Two more asides:

- If you Google “death cab for cutie”, the next autofill from there is “do you remember”. Rough for the legacy.

- “My daughter on the swing like the 2017 Cubs” is a line that confused me, but here’s how Genius explained it:

Chance is talking about a memorable summer and the things that made him happy. This line continues that theme when he raps about his daughter happily on a swing and how that’s similar to the 2017 Cubs. The Chicago Cubs won the World Series in 2016; therefore, the 2017 season was one of celebration and relaxation as the pressure of the 108 year drought was over.

12) Lana Del Rey - “The Greatest”

I miss Long Beach, and I miss you...

Listening to this song feels like watching the cement dry on a classic in real time. Lana Del Rey’s galactic “Norman Fucking Rockwell!” dominated lists at the end of 2019, and she -- to borrow her word -- fucking deserved it.

- The Beach Boys line is so god damn perfect

- The guitar solo (soooo sick)

- The breathy singing; the crooning; the notes that go up and then down until you’re surrounded by melody

- The perfection of this album name (minus the very iffy exclamation point) will have me comparing nearly any other all-time album title for probably the rest of our lives

- Tried playing this album during my Monday night pickup basketball run, and it very much failed... but that’s about the only thing it couldn’t do

- I’m told the dude with her on the album cover is Jack Nicholson’s grandson (named Duke Nicholson, because of course)

11) Off With Their Heads - “No Love”

If you do not like punk rock, this will be unlistenable. If you do, what a treat! I love how dissatisfied and put off he sounds, and, while there are a few more lively songs remaining on the list, none in 2019 got fast-tracked to my workout/pump up playlist at this speed.

Factoring in the band’s van accident (occurred after the release of this song), the “There’s nothing I could say that’s ever gonna make it right” outro becomes hauntingly clairvoyant.

10) Drake f/ Rick Ross - “Money In The Grave”

We need to face facts: it was a down year for stadium hip-hop. Nowhere on this list do you see Jay, Em, Kendrick, or Kanye (rest in peace). This was my favorite rap song of the year, and it couldn’t even crack the Top 5. Similar to his beloved Raptors -- who are being celebrated here -- it’s almost as if Drake needed some injuries outside his own locker room to get the crown. But I’m done being bummed, let’s focus on the good:

- Ohhhh, the intro (”I mean where. the fuck. should I. really even start?”)

- The way he says “grave” in the hook like he can barely contain

- The hook itself -- read it out loud: “When I die, put my money in the grave”

- How cool Ross sounds when he breaks in

- The Zion reference

The bad:

- Rarely take this angle, but really wouldn’t mind if it were longer

- Misogyny

9) PUP - “Bloody Mary, Kate And Ashley”

Second favorite song title of the year, 6/8 time signature, satanic references, drugs, hallucinations (maybe), and, yes, the Olsen twins.

8) Better Oblivion Community Center - “Sleepwalkin’”

“It’s impossible to count...”

The intro, as the tempo gets jarringly slower and slower, ironically helps you acclimate quicker. This Phoebe Bridgers/Conor Oberst collab was my No. 1 played track of 2019 (the album coming out in January definitely helped). The song builds to Phoebe’s solo part:

You like beer and chocolate I like setting off those bottle rockets We can never compromise But fighting 'til the death keeps us alive

It’s sung so well, you can almost feel the heat of the spotlight on her through the stereo. The lyrics could be anything.

The chill guitar solo takes us out.

7) AM Taxi - “Saint Jane”

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Adam Krier is such a rockstar, he had me shouting “I’m no hero, at best a zero!” within my fifth listen -- and I was skeptical as hell when I first heard the line. But that’s about where it stopped. You can tell this song is going to rip even before the vocals come in. When they do (”These fears don’t die, you get older and they multiply”), it’s just fucking time to go.

6) Taylor Swift - “Paper Rings”

My favorite pop song of 2019. Tay is firing on all cylinders; every lyric is exactly where it’s supposed to be; boppy and fun and sincere (while still being light-hearted). Still holding out minor hope it will be a single in 2020.

5) Pkew Pkew Pkew - “The Polynesian”

I’ve always said the best songs make you want to live the lyrics, whether they are positive or negative. This one had me researching “polynesian wisconsin” faster than I’m comfortable disclosing. And yes “bed bugs” and “needles” were both in the Top 7 recommended searches after those first two words.

Pkew Pkew Pkew collaborated with Craig Finn on some of their lyrics on 2019′s “Optimal Lifestyles”, and I’d be blown away if he doesn’t have fingerprints on this one -- the storytelling is pristine. Go into this open-minded, and I’d be shocked if you weren’t shouting the “Goatees, tall cans, camo pants, and Packers fans” mantra by the end.

Bonus story: this St. Patrick’s day in Chicago, I asked my friend Sara (Wisconsin native) if she’d ever stayed there, and she held up her elbow and showed me a scar from the hotel’s water slide. Your boy was over the moon.

4) Spanish Love Songs - “Losers”

It gets harder, doesn’t it?

Dylan Slocum has a way of not just writing depressing songs -- many lyricists are good at that -- but specifically depressing songs. This song contemplates death, homelessness, squandering your limited time on the planet, credit card debt, leeching off your parents because you have no other choice, crippling illness, and completely giving up because there genuinely is no other choice. The last lines are, without any hint of winking, “We’re mediocre. We’re losers. Forever.”

It’s wonderful.

Two straight Top 4 finishes for SLS; their 2020 album should be something special.

3) oso oso - “the view”

If Jade Lilitri is making personal progress in “microscopic strides”, you wouldn’t be able to tell by his songwriting. Every tune has a way of warming up your entire body and being. This grabs you, whether it’s the laid back guitar or the mismatched quick drums or the big ass chorus. While it came down to this one or “basking in the glow” (an actual single), the bridge here puts us over the top:

But not as much as the phone ringing Not as much playing my house Not as much as the way her goddamn voice sounds It's like taking in sun And then taking it back I fall into old habits I'm stepping over your cracks again

Her voice? This song.

2) The Menzingers - “Strangers Forever”

This song makes me want to rip up walls, sprint through streets with no destination, shred my lungs screaming off rooftops, bash hands drumming the steering wheel until my sprained fingers beg me to stop. It is such a perfect encapsulation of my favorite band of the decade and possibly of all-time.

Scranton’s sons gave me everything and more from 2010 through 2019, so it’s fitting they end so high here. This is probably the most clownable sentence of them all, but I am so constantly thankful I am alive to experience Greg Barnett’s songwriting. What he creates, I can only compare to the best books or movies or athletes or even personal relationships.

The way the guitar alternates in the headphones to start, the drums that go big and push the song along, the reverb vox that certainly could have less reverb, the “it is what it is”-style lyric of “My miserable memory’s making me more miserable”, the oceanic imagery, the quiet bridge that explodes into a final chorus. Barnett said the overall theme was inspired by Leo Tolstoy’s “Anna Karenina”.

In it, the character Darya Alexandrovna learns of her husbands infidelity and declares: “Even if we remain in the same house, we are strangers — strangers forever!” The idea of becoming a stranger to someone you so intimately know stuck with me, and became the overarching narrative to this song. Dolly’s statement is definitive, but she also realizes the trappings of 19th century patriarchal Russian society. It’s a complex conundrum, and while lyrically I speak in the first person, this song exists in a world outside of my own personal experiences. I wanted to write about the finality of relationships that need to end this way. Strangers Forever.

My only gripe is I wish there were more. But I’m the same person who never wants them to stop.

1) Signals Midwest f/ Sincere Engineer - “Your New Old Apartment”

Only one song could make me fear missing the chance to be with the love of my life the same year I married her. As discussed in “The Polynesian”, the best songs have the consistent ability to put you in someone else’s shoes. You are either reliving something you personally experienced or maybe taking it all in for the first time. And that can be powerful -- especially dealing with anything big picture.

“Your New Old Apartment” launches me into 2009 without ever asking. Age: 23. My life was transient, I had no career, I didn’t even believe in marriage. I left my retail job in the Chicago suburbs for an unpaid newspaper internship in New Jersey. When I saw the people I loved, I always tried to make it count. Still do.

The descriptors and feeling are suffocating, right from the jump:

I only saw you a couple times last year Once at a wedding, once at a funeral I wore the same clothes to both, and I was worried you would notice ‘cause yours were impeccable

That’s me, then. Not knowing how to dress but hoping to get by anyway. I remember talking to my buddy P before buying my “work clothes” and learning you needed to match your shoes with your belt. Boyish adulthood.

The song continues, and the narrator is filled in on 5-year plans. It may be cliche to speak, but every current moment is simultaneously your youngest and oldest. Being in my early 30s now, it is so easy to scoff at anyone’s best laid plans, but I’m also the same cat who thought The Wonder Years’ “Jesus Christ, I’m 26 / All the people I graduated with / All have kids, all have wives, all have people who care if they come home at night” was life-defining, because I was the same age when that dropped, and it always hits the hardest when it’s all around you.

What I love about these lyrics are the careful observation mixed with mature-behind-his-years restraint. For a very long time in my life, I did not think I would get to be with my wife as anything more than a friend. When you are forced to come to terms with those potential realities, you must make concessions and convince yourself they’re OK. So when it’s revealed the narrator’s muse is married, he resigns himself to hopefully seeing the person more and at least being adjacent to the life they are living. It is tragic but still something. It is alternate hope in the hopeless.

I can picture myself listening to this song that wasn’t yet written while leaving a 2009 or 2010 or 2013 wedding and wishing I told her everything. But I wouldn’t have -- not then. I would have poured my heart out into a diary and quoted a line or three from this at the bottom. But that was then, this is now.

In 2019, her new old apartment will be my new old apartment, and that will never be lost on me.

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* * *

Bonus coverage. Since we are at the end of the decade, I rounded up our No. 1 song from each year and have that below:

2010: The Menzingers - “Time Tables” 2011: Jay-Z & Kanye West - “Gotta Have It” 2012: Carly Rae Jepsen - “Call Me Maybe” 2013: Kanye West - “On Sight” 2014: The Menzingers - “Where Your Heartache Exists” 2015: Big Sean f/ Kanye West - “All Your Fault” 2016: The Menzingers - “Lookers” 2017: The Menzingers - “After The Party” 2018: Horror Squad - “I Smoke The Blood” 2019: Signals Midwest f/ Sincere Engineer - “Your New Old Apartment”

* * *

It’s time to stop writing. Thank you so much for reading.

Spotify playlist is here, featuring 70 of the 75.

0 notes

h-styles-babes · 7 years

Text

No Control | Chapter Nine

Summary:

Micky Bennett: college student, loyal friend, aspiring nurse, One Direction fan, Harry Styles enthusiast. Her best friend, Trevor, wins tickets to a show in New Jersey with meet and greet passes. Micky expects a quick photo op with the boys and a great night at the concert with her best friend. What she gets a whole lot more than she bargained for.

To read previous chapters, you can go here.

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*Gif is not mine.*

NINE

Since we’re only a few blocks from Central Park, the boys make a group decision to head there first, which gives me time to drink my coffee. Harry is still being cautious—which I totally understand—so I stand between him and Niall as we walk around, chatting and enjoying the nice weather. We stick to a paved path as the other boys quiz me, which is much more comfortable for me when they’re sober and Harry is present.

I get asked the typical questions: What am I doing in America? What am I studying? What do I plan to do when I’ve graduated? Where am I from? What’s my family like? What’s with my name? They all are properly astounded when I admit that my parents are hippies and my brother and I are named after famous musicians of the time period.

The boys talk and joke about like any normal twenty-somethings would, which I’m more than happy to experience. If you didn’t know who they were, you’d have no idea that they make up the most popular boyband in the whole world. Aside from the security that assures no one tries to do anything crazy where the boys are concerned, there’s nothing about the four of them that indicates they’re anything other than normal young men.

As we walk, they all excitedly recall stories about their time on tour so far, including me in their conversation. I can’t stop laughing at some of the antics they get into on stage. The stories of their falls and tumbles while performing are abundant, as they seem to all be pretty clumsy. Louis seems to be the only one that hasn’t taken multiple spills.

We stumble upon one of the many playgrounds throughout the park, and there are quite a few children running around and enjoying themselves. Their parents or babysitters sit off to the sidelines, smiling and calling to their children, who seem to all be giggling as they play with one another. All the boys linger, watching the kids play, smiling and waving when a little boy comes up to the fence and waves at them. He’s only about five, so I highly doubt he has any idea who these men are, but he’s excited to see new friends anyway, and the guys look just as excited as he does. I step back and snap a photo on my phone, capturing all their smiles and crinkled eyes.

“You excited for that, mate?” Harry asks Louis, bumping his friend’s shoulder gently with his own. Harry nods his head in the direction of a young family with a baby—probably less than a year old—cuddling on a blanket in the grass, baby propped up on it’s dad’s chest. Why he’s pointing the family out to Louis, I have no idea. I didn’t think Louis was in a serious relationship at the moment.

“Honestly, I can’t wait,” Louis admits, a small, meaningful smile tugging at his lips. “It was a shock at first, but I’m getting more excited.”

It suddenly dawns on me what the boys are talking about. My eyebrows raise on my head and I feel my mouth drop open slightly. The summer months and how busy I’ve been has really cut into the time I spend on social media or watching trash news programs, so I’ve been a bit out of the loop on fandom news.

“You’re gonna be a dad?” I ask, my voice a mix between astonished and excited. I wanna ask who he got pregnant, but I’ll just go home and look it up later if he doesn’t reveal that information himself.

He turns to me and smiles. “Yeah. Beginning of next year.”

“That’s amazing!” I gush, genuinely happy for him since he seems so excited himself. “Congratulations.”

“Thanks, love. We’re looking forward to it. Honestly thought Harry would be the first of us to have a kid.”

“That means he’d actually have to get past his commitment issues,” Liam throws in, snickering.

Harry rolls his eyes. “I do not have commitment issues. I’m a faithful guy.”

“Yeah, you just can’t keep a girlfriend for longer than a couple months. Totally not commitment issues.”

“Fuck you, Liam. I just haven’t found the right girl, yet.”

“Hey, I just realized something!” Niall interjects, turning from the fence to address us all and effectively ending the spat between Harry and Liam.

“What’s up, Ni?” Harry asks.

“Now there’ll be two lads in the group that someone else calls ‘daddy.’”

My mouth drops open in shock, and I cover it with my hand to keep in the laughs that want to come out. Louis and Liam double over in laughter, making wheezing comments about Harry’s kink. Harry glares at his three bandmates, cheeks sucked in where he’s chewing on them. Niall is cackling like I’ve never heard before. Seeing them laughing so hard makes it impossible for me to keep mine in, so I let out a few chuckles and place a comforting hand on Harry’s back in silent support, hoping his anger or embarrassment isn’t too much. Harry just rolls his eyes and begins walking away, the four of us rushing to catch up.

When we finally emerge from the park, it’s to a small crowd of young girls, apparently here on some sort of trip, because they’re with an older woman who’s trying to herd them to their next destination. One of them looks up from their phone and looks directly at the boys. Here eyes widen and her mouth pops open comically. She silently tugs on the shirt hem of the girl next to her. Her friend looks to her and looks where her eyes are trained, a similar expression sprouting on her face when she sees all four boys of One Direction.

The boys notice the attention, so they all smile and walk up to the group, throwing out greetings. The girls are a little stunned, and only mumble responses. The mother or chaperone seems to be the only one able to form a coherent sentence, smiling and asking how the guys are. She obviously knows who they are, but she just shakes their hands and tells them how much her daughters and nieces love them. The girls around her nod in agreement.

“Do you boys mind if we get a picture?” the mother/aunt asks.

“Not at all,” Liam responds, smiling. “Group photo, yeah?”

They nod and all get into a group, the boys weaving there way amongst the five girls. They all seem pretty giddy to be taking a picture with the boys of One Direction, and the older woman moves to take the picture.

“I can take that for you, if you wanna get in the picture with them,” I offer. I’m just standing there pretty uselessly, so I figured I may as well. She thanks me, handing me her phone, and inserts herself into the side. I count off and take a few pictures, making sure there’ll be at least one that turns out alright.

The boys all hug the girls and thank them for the support. The woman comes over to me and I hand her the phone back.

“Thank you so much,” she gushes. “I say the girls are in love with One Direction, but they’ve grown on me, too,” she admits a little bashfully.

I laugh. “That’s alright, they’re lovable guys.” I watch over her shoulder as the boys talk with the girls, who are smiling like they’ve just won the lottery. I guess they have won the celebrity encounter lottery.

The girls say their goodbyes and walk down the street, squealing with each other about what just happened as they pass. I chuckle and imagine I would’ve acted much the same way if I had met One Direction when I was their age.

The guys chat about how nice the girls were as we work our way toward the Guggenheim, since they’ve never been. It’s more centered towards children, but it’s definitely something you should see while you’re in New York. So, I wander alongside the four of them, taking in the attractions and pointing things out to the boys that I find interesting. Obviously, being the science nerd that I am, I find things a lot more spectacular than they do, but they play nice and humor me, humming in acknowledgement as I explain things.

After the museum, we double back and head back the way we came, taking the streets. I suggest the guys go shopping in 5th Avenue while Harry and I go the MoMA, which they agree to. We agree to meet in Times Square to figure out something for lunch in a few hours.

When Harry and I get to the museum, he looks around, sees most of the patrons are older, and grabs onto my hand. I lock our fingers together and smile up at him before letting him lead us to the first exhibit. There’s a room full of van Gogh works that Harry likes and I’m quite partial to, but I can tell he’s excited to get to the Warhol installation by the way he keeps glancing at it on the little pamphlet we got handed when we entered.

We walk through a few modern exhibitions from local artists that are really good. I’m not much into abstract art, but Harry seems to really like it, so I let him mull over a few that he seems to get sucked in by as we walk through. After about fifteen minutes in that room, we finally get to the Andy Warhol room. All his famous photos are up in the walls, including the Campbell’s Soup Can that Harry seems to really love. I really enjoy Warhol, too, so we spend about half an hour in the exhibit. I get particularly hung up on the James Dean piece, and Harry kindly stands beside me, his arm wrapped around my waist.

“He was just so handsome,” I sigh a bit dreamily, I’ll admit. Next to Harry, James Dean is my ultimate celebrity crush. Something about film in the fifties and the enigma that was James Dean is so fascinating to me. It also doesn’t hurt that he was so attractive.

“He really was,” he agrees with a resolute nod. “Shame he isn’t still around. There’s so much I’d want to ask him.”

We stand there for a few moments more, just admiring the artwork, before Harry presses a kiss to the side of my head and we get moving. The boys text Harry and we all agree it’s time to head out to meet up at Times Square. When we get there, we walk around a bit and decide to head to Hard Rock Cafe for lunch. The boys will be able to get a private table, so I’m not worried about running into anybody taking pictures.

The hostess nearly trips over herself getting the boys to a table, even though she works at a pretty famous restaurant in the middle of a popular spot for celebrities. We’re seated in a fairly private corner in the back, and I take a seat between Harry and Niall, Louis and Liam sitting across from us.

After the waitress leaves once she’s taken our drink orders, I feel the buzz of my phone in my pocket. It’s a text from Trevor, and all it says is, ‘Go on Twitter. Now.’ This is a little more urgent and serious than I’ve really ever heard Trev over text, so I immediately pull up the app on my phone and wait for it to load. As my timeline is loading up, Harry’s phone goes off, buzzing on the tabletop where he set it when we sat.

“What is it, mate?” Louis asks as Harry’s eyebrows furrow.

“My mum,” he answers. My app finally displays Tweets and I scroll, trying to find something that would get Trevor in such a serious mood. “It’s kinda late there.” He sighs and answers anyway with a sweet, “Hi, Mumma.”

I can hear his mother responding something in a sweet voice as my eyes land on what Trevor is so worked up about. My eyes bug out of my head a bit as I see the photos plastered all over the site: Harry and the boys out in Central Park, us entering the Guggenheim, Harry and I entering the MoMA, Harry and I walking hand in hand throughout the exhibits, Harry with his arm around me in the Warhol room, Harry pressing a kiss to my head in front of the James Dean piece. My face is plain as day in all the photos, and I curse whoever’s phone has such great camera quality. The captions on the photos quickly diverge from the casual, ‘One Direction and friend out for day off in NYC,’ to ‘Harry Styles pictured getting cozy with mystery woman in NYC.’

“Mum, what are you talking about?” I hear Harry ask, the furrow on his forehead getting deeper. I have a feeling I know what she’s talking about. I tug on the sleeve of Harry’s shirt to get his attention.

“H,” I say, pushing my phone toward him. He takes it in his hand as his mother continues to talk in his ear. He scrolls through, seeing all the photos that have been posted of us. His lips are pursed and he looks less than happy.

“Mum, it’s not a big deal. You know how the tabs always make it out to be. Twitter is just as bad. She’s just a friend I met in New York. She offered to show us around a bit.” Harry hands me my phone back with a mouthed, ‘sorry.’ I just nod to let him know it’s okay. I really don’t care about photos being out there of me when my name isn’t attached to them. But I know this is less than ideal for Harry and the boys.

“You know how I am, Mum. She’s nice, promise. Her name is Micky. The boys like her. She’s here with us at lunch right now.” He pauses again as his mother says something. “She’s from Manchester. She’s in the states for school.” Another pause. “That’s not up to me. I’ll have to ask her.”

He takes the phone away from his face and gives me an apologetic smile. “Mum wants to talk to you, if that’s alright.”  I hear the other three boys snicker, but they hide it behind their drinks that have been delivered. I throw them all a warning look. I’ve known them for about five hours and I already feel like I have to mother them. Must be exhausting for their handlers.

“That’s fine, Harry.”

“She’s probably just gonna apologize for you getting exposed like this. Might quiz you a bit. She’s harmless,” he assures.

“I’m sure she’s lovely, Harry. She raised you, didn’t she?”

He beams at me as I take the phone from him. I take a deep breath before pressing it to my ear. “Hello.”

“Hello, darling, I’m Anne, Harry’s mum,” she greets, sounding warm and bright, just like her son. “Saw the pictures on Twitter.”

I sigh. “Yeah, I just saw those, too. I’m Micky, by the way.”

“It’s good to sort of meet you, poppet. Harry and you getting on alright?”

I chuckle. “Yeah, he’s been great. Gentleman and all.”

“He better be,” she says, her voice carrying a slight warning. “Raised him right, I hope. Anyway, I’m sorry you’ve already got your face plastered all over the internet. Not gonna be any better once gossip mags get ahold of them.”

“It’s alright. As long as they don’t get any personal information of mine, I’ll be okay. Can’t do much with just a face, right?”

“Right,” she assures, though she sounds a little hesitant about it, which is understandable. Nothing is certain when it comes to the public eye. “Well, I’ll let you get back to your lunch. Let me know if Harry gets out of line. He needs someone keeping and eye on him out there.” I can hear the teasing in her voice, so I chuckle.

“Of course. It was nice talking to you, Anne.”

“Oh, you too, darling. Give me back to Harry, yeah?”

“Sure thing.”

I pass Harry back his phone, and he raises his eyebrows, obviously curious as to what Anne and I have been talking about. I just smile at him as he addresses his mum again.

I tune out the rest of their conversation and go back to my own phone to text Trevor back. I send him a quick check-in, telling him I saw the photos and Harry’s on the phone with his mum and that we’ll deal with it. He sends me back a thumbs up emoji and tells me he’s going out to a gay bar with some of his other friends tonight, so I shouldn’t wait up.

Harry finally hangs up with his mum when our food comes out, and even though I didn’t get a chance to order, since I was on the phone with Anne, Harry ordered me a burger just the way I like it. I’m curious about how he knew about it, but I remember a conversation we had the previous day about how we liked out food. Apparently a useless conversation actually came in handy for once.

“Saw the photos online,” Niall comments between bites of his burger. “What are yeh gonna do?” He looks between Harry and I for an answer.

“We’ll just lay low for the rest of the day. You guys are welcome to adventure some more, but I want to spend the rest of my day off out of the public eye,” Harry says.

I nod. “I agree.”

“You don’t care that they’ve got your face plastered everywhere?” Liam asks.

I shrug. “Not much I can do about it now. They don’t know anything about me, so I’m not worried.”

I feel Harry’s hand clasp over my thigh under the table, giving me a comforting squeeze. I look over at him and smile, letting him know that I’m okay. It was a one time thing that will blow over when no new pictures of the two of us together emerge. Harry’s got a tour to get back to tomorrow, and I’ve got a trip back home planned before coming back to start the new semester. Our time seeing each other is nearly over, so there’s no reason to worry.

My heart does lurch a little at the thought of this being the last of my time with Harry, though. I’ve grown so fond of him in the two days that I’ve got to spend with him. I can only hope that we’ll still be able to talk once in a while, because he really is an amazing person. What little I’ve been let into his life is so astounding and he’s so wonderful, I don’t even want to begin to think about what it would feel like to be excluded from it now.

Niall picks up the tab for lunch as an apology for taking the piss out of Harry all day, and Harry just smiles at him, tossing his arm around his shoulders as we walk out, back into the warm New York air. We part in front of the restaurant, bidding the other boys farewell as Harry and I make our way back to the condo. Security has been foregone, since the other three will need it more after their whereabouts have been posted online. Harry simply pulls his hair up into a bun, shoves on a beanie, and pushes his sunglasses over his nose as a mediocre disguise. We walk with his arm slung over my shoulder the whole way back, not once being stopped by fans on the street.

When we arrive back, the house is quiet, Trevor having already left to grab an early dinner with his mates before going clubbing. He’s left a note on the counter saying he’ll be back in by three in the morning, and if he’s not, to call the cops. I roll my eyes at his dramatics an drop my purse on the counter.

“Where’s Trev?” Harry asks, having not seen the note.

“Went out to eat and to go clubbing with some mates,” I say. “Just you and me, Styles. What do you want to do?”

A smirk pulls at his lips as he takes his beanie off his head. He takes his hair out of the tie and lets it fall in the messy curls around his shoulders. I can see his pupils dilating as he cups the back of my neck, tilting my head back slightly to make me look up at him. I can feel my nipples hardening at the intensity of his stare, and I can’t help pulling my bottom lip between my teeth. His thumb reaches up to pull the flesh away from my grip on it.

“How about we have some fun, princess? Daddy wants to make you feel good.”

TEN

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #No Control #one direction

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