#I love tho that generally we’re like ‘yeah we like these albums!!!’

[f4y3w00d5]

And to finish up for the night here is my brief description of Every Song in Danger Days: True Lives Of The Fabulous Killjoys, by My Chemical Romance

Okay so basically  this is their most recent album, 2014, and it follows the Killjoys as they fight against BL.IND (Better Living Industries) who seek to ELIMINATE all  individuality. (Spoiler: They die saving The Girl in the music video for SING) 

Na Na Na (Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na) - 

Upbeat!!! Dancing!!! Fast!!! You jump around screaming about doing crime and partying and sex!!! I love it!!! (you should listen to it after Look Alive Sunshine, which is the intro to the album and its just Dr D speaking, and at the start of Na Na Na, it goes ‘THE FUTURE IS BULLETPROOF! THE AFTERMATH IS SECONDARY!! TIME TO DO IT NOW AND DO IT LOUD! KILLJOYS, MAKE SOME NOISE!!!’) 

Bulletproof Heart 

Uh so this is sorta less fast and stuff but its SO cool and idk how to describe it but its sorta jaunty? First song I listened to by the band!!! (Fav part is ‘and tho, I know, how much you hate this. Are you gonna be the one to save us? From. The black. And hope-less feelin. Will you meet ‘em when the end comes reelin? Hold, your heart, into this darkness. Will it ever be the light to shine you out? Or fail. And leave you stranded? I aint gonna be the one left standin. You aint gonna be the one left standin, and we aint gonna be the ones left standin!!!’) 

SING 

Aaaaaaaaa this ones so cool, took a bit to grow on me, its mostly slow and repetitive but the BRIDGE ‘Cleaned up corporations PROGRESS! Dyin in the PROCESS! Children that can TALK ABOUT IT livin on the WEB-WAYS, people movin SIDEWAYS, sell it til your LAST DAYS, buy yourself the motivation GENERATION NOTHIN! Nothing but a DEAD SCENE! Product of a WHITE DREAM! I am not the SINGER THAT YOU WANTED BUT A DANCER! I REFUSE TO ANSWER! TALK ABOUT THE PAST SIR! WROTE IT FOR THE ONES WHO WANNA GET AWAY! ……. Keep runnin.’ 

Planetary (GO!)  

Okay so like omg. I love this one. Everythings amazin. Starts off slightly slow, and then starts movin faster around the verses? AND THE VIBES!!! Ive got a few favs and ill save them here (I love the way theyre said too-) ‘Ladies and gentleman, truth is now acceptable! Fame! Is now injectable, PROCESS THE PROGRESS, This core is critical, faith is un-a-vail-a-ble, Lives, become incredible-‘ and also ‘Youre unbelievable, ah, so unbelievable, ah, you ruin everything, oh, you better GO HOME! Im unbelievable yeah, im undefeatable yeah, LETS RUIN EVERYTHIN, BLAST IT TO THE BACK ROW- they sell presentable, young! And so ingestible! Sterile and collectable! SAFE, and I cant STAND THAT! This is a letter, by word, is the beretta, the sound, of my vendetta against, the ones that PLANNED IT!’ So uhhhhhhhhh yeah lol 

The Only Hope For Me Is You 

Likeeeeeeeee holy SHIT this one just sorta- idkkkk- ‘Where? Where were you when, all of the embers fell? I still remember them… covered in ash. Covered in glass. Covered in all my friends, I still… think of the bombs they built- IF THERES A PLACEEE THAT I COULD BE, THEN ID BE ANOTHERR MEMORY, CAN I BE THE ONLY HOPE FOR YOU? BECAUSE YOURE THE ONLY HOPE FOR ME! AND IF WE CAN FIND WHERE  WE BELONG, WE’ll Have To make It on our own!! Face all the painnn and takeee it on, because the only hope for me, is you alone…’ its one of the slower ones tho 

Party Poison 

This one starts in Japanese for some reason??? Its hard to explain… another fast and dancy type one ig, but sorta raw-er?  Its sooooooo weird- not one of my favs but its semi popular 

Save Yourself, I’ll Hold Them Back 

Okay so idk how to describe this really- sorta gives Only Hope type thing but faster and sorta rockier? Idk. My fav parts tho!!! ‘Get offfff the ledge, and drop the knife… Not a victim of a victims life! Because… this aint a room fullla suicides- WE’RE BELIEVERSS I BELIEVE TONIGHT-‘  OH AND ONE OF THE MORE POPULAR LINES PEOPLE KNOW ‘Ill tell you well how the story ends, where the good guys die and the bad guys win… (WHO CARES?)- THIS AINT ABOUT ALL THE FRIENDS YOU MADE, BUT THE GRAFFITII THEY WRITE ON YOUR GRAVE-‘ then the last two ‘Im the only friend that makes you cry! Youre a heart attack in black hair dye! So just save yourself, and Ill hold them back tonight….’ And ‘We can live forever if you’ve got the time- YOU MOTHERFUCKER (OHHHWHOAAAA) Youre the broken glass in the mornin light! Be a burnin’ star if it takes all night!’ 

S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W 

OHOHOH APPARENTLY THIS ONE IS TO SOOTHE THE KIDS WHEN THE NUCLEAR BOMBS HIT AND GET THEM INTO THE SHELTER!!! (yes there are nuclear bombs, its post apocalyptic lmao) I love the bridge- ‘Love, love, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this… bomb……. Run, run, bunny, run. Run, run, bunny ruuuuuuuuuuun’ One of the slowest in the album also 

Summertime 

Okay so this is prolly my fav? Idk how to describe it tbh….. I know what it describes for me buuuut you don’t wanna hear me be weird about people……. Ill just tell you my fav parts (that I relate to!!!) ‘Terrified of what I’d be, as a kid from what Ive seen… Every single day when people try and put the pieces back together, just to smash them down… turn my headphones up real loud…. I don’t think I need them now…. Cos you stop the noise!!!’ 

DESTROYA 

………………fucked up robot song where you scream and moan. What else is there to say? (the porn bots In the story worship a ‘god’ called Destroya who will supposedly come save them) 

The Kids From Yesterday 

I love this one too. Sorta slow ig. Nostalgic maybe? ‘Well now, this could be the last of all the rides we take…. So hold on tight and don’t look back……… we don’t care about the message or the rules they make…. Ill find you when the sun goes black…..’ 

Vampire Money 

Dance!!! Sex!! Upbeat!!! Fast!!! ‘Three two one, we came to FUCK-‘ and my other fav line ‘and get your finger on the trigger tap the barrel of the gun! Hair back, motherfucker, jet black, SO COOL-‘ 

@terrencetheshark14 you might be interested in my weird ass mcr related ramblings

[fonkeloog]

Britt's music things (deluxe edition)

Sounds Good Feels Good

○ Artist: 5 Seconds of Summer (5SOS)

○ Release date: October 23rd, 2015

○ Duration: 1 hour and 4 minutes

○ Overall rating: 7,6/10

Money: 6.4/10

I swear to god the first time I heard this song I got a near heart attack. The first 20 seconds is just background noise of them getting into the studio and settled behind their instruments. I had my sound all the way up. Once the music starts, it’s loud!

So, there aren’t any lyrics that are important to me. It’s a great song to dance too and an absolute banger to start the album with.

Take my money is a very accurate lyric. I am broke, but please take my money in exchange for this album on vinyl.

 She’s Kinda Hot: 4.8/10

Very much a song made for the radio. It’s a bop, but it’s overplayed and I kinda hate it.

They say we’re losers and we’re alright with that / We are the leaders of the not coming backs. / We are the kings and the queens of the new broken scene / Yeah we’re alright tho.

Teenage me took these lyrics and made them her life anthem. And I can’t blame her for doing so.

 Hey Everybody!: 6.1/10

Again. A radio song. I don’t hate it, but it definitely is a skip most of the time.

It is a great song for dancing, but that’s it really.

I don’t hate it, but it’s very pop sounding. (I listen to a lot of pop. So me saying this should tell you enough regarding the general sound.)

 Permanent Vacation: 7/10

Congratulations, your imitations / Are taking over the radio stations / Corporations, calculations / We’re the voice of the new generation

This bridge is a masterpiece and I love it. Other than that, it’s another happy song without a lot of meaning.

Since this is the 4th song, the listener will start to think they have an idea as to what the sound of the album will be like.

 Jet Black Heart: 10/10

And then you get hit with this.

Tears. Pain. Ouchies.

Cause I’ve got a jet black heart / And there’s a hurricane underneath it / Trying to keep us apart / I write with a poison pen / But these chemicals moving between us / Are the reason to start again.

The blood in my veins / is made up of mistakes / Let’s forget who we are / and dive into the dark / as we burst into colour / returning to life

I cannot with this song. It hurts in a good way, but it also hits way too close.

This song is kind of like a divider in the album. Before this it was all very happy and fun, but now you get this and it just makes you realise that this might not be your new ‘Happy album’.

 Catch Fire: 8.3/10

I know that I can’t change the world / But maybe I’ll change your mind.

Really this song is just another one of those where you start listening to the lyrics and suddenly they hit you like a fucking wrecking ball.

It’s really hard to rate this song. Because I skip it almost all the time but I actually really like it? I just have to be in the mood to listen to it I guess.

The lyrics make up for most of the rating tho. The sound is not doing much to me personally.

 Safety Pin: 7.1/10

The 2015 sound really comes out here.

Two wrongs make it right / We’ll safety pin, the pieces of our broken hearts back together / patching up all the holes until we both feel much better / Deleted things are really dead, so now I’ll say the things I never said / We’ll safety pin, the pieces of our broken hearts back together / No more waiting, we can save us from falling

 Waste The Night: 7/10

Now that I critically listen to this album I realise that the main reason I like it, is because of the sentimental weight it has to me?

I don’t hate it, but they have definitely made much better albums after this one.

The last minute of this always catches me off guard. I think the song is finished and then the instrumental part starts.

Said instrumental is also the sole reason this gets a 7. I couldn’t care less about this song otherwise.

 Vapor: 6.9/10

Okay. Call me a hypocrite, cause I will absolutely lose my mind to any of these songs live, but I don’t really care for this album as much as I used to do?

Vapor is still a bop, don’t get me wrong. I can totally see why teenage me went absolutely crazy when this dropped, but I am very indifferent to it?

Make it sound so sweet / when you lie to me

Still a solid 6/10 tho.

 Castaway: 9/10

Now this I still love.

Cause you walked out and left me stranded / Nothing left but picture frames / And I just keep on asking myself / How'd we drift so far away from where we left off yesterday? / I'm lonely like a castaway / Heartbreak that I can't escape, a sinking ship I'll never save / I'm lonely like a castaway

I love the guitars, the way the fall back and the return full force.

This is what I remember most of the album being like, so it’s nice to know I wasn’t completely making things up

 The Girl Who Cried Wolf: 7/10

This is so fucking sad. I love to listen to this when I need a good cry.

So look at me in the eye / is anyone there at all? / Cause I’m not dreaming / So look at me in the eye / Is anyone there at all? / Cause I’m not leaving

This song still means a lot to me, and it still makes me cry when I listen to it.

The way they end it just hits. Michael’s voice is so raw and full of emotions. It kind of feels like a hug from a friend

 Broken Home: 7.5/10

I used to refer to this as ‘the divorce song’

It’s sad, and I like how vulnerable it is, but I can’t really relate to the lyrics so that makes it just another sad song to me.

I love how much it has done for a lot of other people tho.

It’s heartbreaking, but in a nice way?

 Fly Away: 5.7/10

This song after Broken Home is the biggest emotional whiplash you’ll ever feel.

I like the song, I do not like the sudden change of pace.

It is once again a ‘I can see why teenage me loved this’ kind of song.

I like the parts where the music is kind of stripped away, but that’s about it.

 Invisible: 9.8/10

I was already missing before the night I left / Just me and my shadow and all of my regrets / Who am I? Who am I when I don’t know myself?

Those lines still hit a little too close to home.

Another day, the walls are built to keep me safe / I can’t escape, it’s too late.

What a line to end with. And the violins?! Fucking beautiful

 Airplanes: 8/10

I like the sound of this a lot more than I did when I was younger.

Like angels can fly, we’ll never die

That line is all that matters in that song. That, and the way the beat keeps coming back.

Solid 8/10. I had kind of forgotten how good of a song this was.

 San Francisco: 9/10

This is giving such big ‘long lost childhood friends’ vibes. I love it.

It’s like a safe haven after the heartbreak.

I wanna get back to where we started / To the summer night / You know, you know, you know, you know we got it right

The song ends at 3 minutes, and then has a full minutes with violins and guitars to close it. I’m absolutely obsessed with that part. Especially when the violin joins. It just all works so well and ugh. I need that part to be longer

 Outer Space / Carry On: 10/10

Can I quote this whole song?

6 minutes and 38 seconds of absolute heaven.

The darkest night never felt so bright with you by my side / Nothing like the rain, nothing like the rain / When you’re in outer space, when you’re in outer space

I love that part so much

Carry on, outlast the ignorance / Moving on, survive the innocence / And it won’t be long, won’t be long, won’t be long / You know it’s gonna get better / You know it’s gonna get better

God, what a way to end an album. Hearing this live was a dream come true and way too many tears. If you want to listen to only one song by 5sos, please let it be this one.

I always forget about this song and I’m so glad this reminded me of it again.

-------------------------------------------------------

Summary: teenage angst and every song on the radio in 2015 had a baby

This album will always hold a special place in my heart. It made me a fan of 5sos. Whoever, during the review I realised that I've grown up. A lot of the songs I used to feel passionate about don't really do anything for me now. I still like them, but it's definitely not my favourite album of theirs anymore. The first songs sound like they just wanted to get a hit, and then they close with such a wonderful one? It's kind of all over the place, but I love it anyways.

[gaygh0stt]

because I still have jedtavius brainrot, I'm gonna ramble about my favorite natm headcanons ❤️

(sorry if this gets long (future me here: it did))

Larry is constantly finding Jed and Oct hiding out places and being romantic little dumbasses. he has a whole album of pictures of them on his phone that he could use as blackmail material, but honestly they're not even blackmail because at this point practically everyone in the museum has found them in some compromising position or another (but, of course, they think they're being so sneaky about it)

I absolutely love all the fics where they have museum wide movie nights, it's just so wholesome you can't convince me this isn't canon now🥺 Jed and Oct have totally fallen asleep on eachother multiple times during these, they also get into little arguments over the movies to the point where Larry's threatened to kick them out.

While we know Ahkmenrah has a dark sense of humor, he's also a very good listener and gives great advice. he's also very protective and kind and cares deeply for everyone in the museum and he's still a bit of a child at heart (dying so young sorta does that to ya) like yeah he's a little weird, but he's really good at heart ❤️ (....is my childhood crush showing...)

Because this is my canon and I can do what I want, the tablet and everything stays at the museum permanently after the end of the third movie (obviously Ahk's family is there too) because i don't want to think about these guys not having more time together. I would also like to think that Tilly transfers there too now that Larry's moved on. Also Lancelot's just there vibin.

Jed and Oct both slowly pick up eachother's specific vocabularies and sometimes slip them in when they're talking, much to their embarrassment. The first time it happened, Oct slipped up and they both just stared at each other, shocked for a good minute, and Jed never lets him live it down.

Also, Jed has taken to calling Oct "my liege," he'll be super corny about it, bowing and kissing Oct's hand, and every time Oct gets so flushed and Jed just watches him with a delighted smile🥺

I'd like to think that Jed is the one to teach Oct to dance (as in, actual partner dancing). Oct was a general, most of his time was spent fighting and planning for war, i don't see him being much of a party person, but Jed was always dancing and sort of being the life of the party in the wild west, so he teaches Oct and they spend many nights just dancing together (and of course they'll dance to Taylor Swift, because this is my new agenda ❤️)

Larry is constantly getting chewed out by McPhee because of Jed and Octavius, it gets to the point where he doesn't even understand how Larry does it, he thinks that Larry must get custom miniatures made just to put them in the most ridiculous positions. Jed and Oct then get chewed out by Larry but they never learn and they honestly don't want to because Larry getting onto them is sort of hilarious and they know none of his threats are really serious

(Gonna get a bit horny rip) I agree with what seems to be the common belief of Oct mainly being a bottom (and sometimes a bratty one at that) but i believe they are both switches and on the occasion that Jed bottoms he's just absolute putty and Octavius takes great pride in this (okay maybe i just want to see Jed being absolutely taken apart to the point he can barely move...sue me)

Both Jed and Octavius have a bad habit of getting caught up in their work and forgetting to rest, so when one notices the other doing this they have to physically drag them away from their work and it leads to lots of back massages, hair stroking, sweet nothings, and cuddles (we saw the horny version of this in my asks but here is the pg version that i thought it was heading in sksk)

Jed and Oct have lots of little hideouts around the museum that they go to when they want to get away from the ruckus and have some alone time together. Larry knows about a few of them but keeps quiet and let's them have their fun❤️

They are both so fucking touch starved. they'll never admit it, but a lot of their fighting was an excuse to be close to eachother before they fully realized their feelings. now they're both extremely clingy and if they find themselves alone, they are never not touching (in public it's a bit of a different story, but eventually they do sort of become an obnoxious pda couple)

If we're gonna go for canon compliancy, I'd say they finally get together at the end of Secret of The Tomb. I also love the angst factor of them not getting together and freezing thinking they'll never know eachother's true feelings until they suddenly wake up again three years later and just immediately run to find each other to confess because they can't stand the thought of losing that chance again and it's just a very tearful confession (both happy and sad tears) and they vow to make the most of whatever time they have left together (which in my mind is like forever because i can't let go of these dumbasses) to make up for all the lost years (i do have some other getting together scenarios that i want to use for fics tho👀)

...okay this got a little out of hand so I think I'll leave it at that for now, but who knows maybe I'll add more later❤️

[bedtimebrain]

EXO Baekhyun: Cry for Love Part 1

Boldly writing this very unlikely scenario about baek. Part of me just feels like there might be a part of baek that might be in such a situation if he ever feels so deeply for someone that is not be able to handle the stress of dating an idol.

Using the song title of one of my favourite songs from his latest album for this~ there’s going to be 2 parts(hopefully not 3), and just a disclaimer the ending might not be fluff, so don’t get started if you’re not prepared !

Edit: Part 2 is up! (No part 3 tho, thankfull)

Part 2

Characters: Baek x You

Baekhyun finds himself falling for you, but feels he cannot be so selfish to put the burdens of dating an idol upon you. In an attempt to control his feelings, he tries to stay away from you

Standing across the narrow road opposite to Wendy Cafe, Baekhyun looked intently inside, with a sort of sourness at the back of his throat. This is at least 5th time this guy has been here, and it’s been the second time this week already. His inner self was literally scowling at that thought, but what could he do?

His phone that vibrated in his pocket called him out of his thoughts. It was a call from his manager, asking him to return to the SM building.

Taking one last look at you, at the guy, and at the cafe, he placed both his hands back in his pocket, head facing down and walked back to where his car was.

During the ride back, he thought long and hard, was this the right thing to do?  Just 4 months ago, was the first step into the cafe the beginning to this unwanted path ?

He can’t help but replay once again all that started 4 months ago...

——

‘Bye! See you next week!’

Ending his gym session for the week, baekhyun headed for the carpark, eager to get there quickly. Today, he was to be home for a family dinner.

He had been up till late yesterday, practicing and preparing for EXO’s new album. With just 4hours of sleep, his ruined body clock woke him up in time for a gym session in the afternoon. Beating himself to be disciplined so that he can show his best image to Eris during the comeback, he got himself to the gym. 

But now, the sweat from the gym session coupled with his sleep debt, was making him feel extra sleepy.

Needing some caffeine in his system, he stopped his car by the roadside to search up coffee houses nearby. Scrolling through, Starbucks -too crowded , dal.kom- he was not a fan , Daebak Coffee and Tea - seems very popular among reviews, Wendy Cafe - no reviews.

Feeling it’s best to avoid crowded cafes on a Friday afternoon, he decided to give Wendy Cafe a try. Following the voice of Google maps, he found himself along a narrow road, secluded and outcasted from the bustling roads just 2 minutes ago.

‘Am I at the right place? Why would someone open a cafe here?’ He loudly spoke in a typical monologue with himself

Just as he was about to give up, a small signboard peeked out from the brick wall stretching along the road.

‘Ah yes, found you! I hope I didn’t make the wrong choice’

After parking his car, he crossed the road to the cafe.

Wendy’s Cafe was clad in wood and white, wooden tables, white chairs, surrounded by grey walls. It was so small only about 6 people could be seated by the tables. To make up for it, a counter-side table was made available and soft music played in the background. Walking in, Baekhyun felt a comfortable sense of peace and relax.

‘Hello, 1 Ice Americano please’

‘Hello, that will be $5.. omo’ Just as you looked up at him, you were shocked to recognise him as Baekhyun from EXO. But you quickly recovered in time, taking the money from him and continued your chores.

Seeing that you have recognised him, he nodded politely. He appreciated your politeness and professionalism to not overreact. And proceed to wait patiently for his coffee.

‘Thank you, have a nice day’ you smiled brightly at him and handed the coffee over.

Just then, it started pouring heavily outside, stopping Baekhyun in his tracks.

‘Should I drive back now ? It’s a long journey back and it’s raining so heavily ...’ he thought

‘Do you want to wait out the rain instead? It’s not too safe to drive in such heavy rain. No one comes here on rainy days, I can put out the close sign for you if you like’ 

You asked rather sincerely 

Looking out again at the rain, he weighed his choices. He was going to be drenched if he crossed the road but what if you were one of those fans that would expose where he was to everyone? 

He was feeling a little suspicious inside, afterall why would you close the shop to business just for him?

‘You can take the table furthest away from the window if you’re worried’

He looked at you, judging a book by it’s cover. And decided it doesn’t appear like you would turn out to be one of those crazy fans and took the option of waiting out the rain. 

His phone was running out of battery, so instead of sitting by the corner table all bored and lonely, Baekhyun sat on the bar counter table instead; facing you and the other male employee who were busy with fresh bakes.

You presented a bite size muffin on a white plate and gave it over to him. ‘It’s on the house, we’re not going to have any more customers anyway’

Being curious since the start, he asked ‘why would your boss open a cafe right here? It’s really not the best location to be attracting people right?’

Laughing slightly, you replied

‘My boss? That would be me, and does this cafe look like I want to attract people in? The tables are all for 2s, I’m just encouraging solitude here’

‘You own this place? Wow I would suppose you’re only in your early 20s right? Anyway this place does give a sense of quietness that we dont quite get outside. I like it’ He lively replied

‘Yeah, I just wanted people that come by to be able to stop and find quietness they don’t get anywhere else. Finding time for themselves to be away from noisy city life just a few minutes away’

Not really having anything to say to that deep thought of yours, he simply replied ‘Ahh... I see. Uh, thanks for muffin, it smells tasty’

You smiled politely and left him to himself as you cleaned up the open kitchen.

The rain that was beating the ground outside was almost like a lullaby to Baekhyun. The warmth of the shop and the music aided the rain and drowsy effects he was having, shortly without knowing, he drifted to sleep. --

‘Baekhyun ssi, Baekhyun ssi’ you tapped him lightly till he woke up

‘It stopped raining, do you want to head off’

‘Oh my , can’t believe I slept, but that was certainly the quietness I need, haha. I’ll be leaving. Thank you for the coffee’

As he left, he thought to himself that he will surely be back.

—

A week later, he came back. On that day, he saw from outside that you were casually sitting down by on of the tables, chatting with a middle age office lady.

Opening the door, he caught your attention and you smiled slightly to acknowledge. As you were the only working employee today, you got up from the table to serve him.

‘Hi Baekhyun ssi, I see you’re back. Ice americano for you? Or would you like to try something else? Wendy’s special for a bright sunny day’

‘Sure I’ll go for the Wendy’s special’

Handing over the coffee to baekhyun, you asked

‘I heard EXO’s preparing for a comeback. How’s it going for you?’

‘Did you search up on EXO after you saw me last week? Hahaha. Anyway it’s fine, it’s just the discipline in diet, exercise and health that’s annoying’

‘I see. And nah, don’t make me sound like a stalker fan please. I just moderately keep up with kpop in general’

‘Anyway is the middle age lady there your friend? Or do you just chat with your customers all the time?’

‘Oh, she’s just a customer. Really depends though, some people come here seeming to have heavy thoughts, sometimes when I notice I’ll just casually chat with them. Some others are here really putting up a do not disturb sign. Those I wouldn’t bother’

Being cheeky, Baekhyun asked ‘what about me?’

You thought for a while before answering

‘Like a cat? Like those I would give some affection to before letting them run off so they don’t start scratching me. I mean not saying you would be aggressive, but rather, I’m sure a good balance of chat and quietness would be best for you’

Raising his brows and thinking through what you just said, he smiled after a while and went on sipping his Wendy’s special by the counter again. Occasionally, he would look up from his phone to chat with you.

—-

For that 1 month, it seems like he started developing a routine to drop by your cafe for short breaks. He enjoyed your company and somehow your cafe seemed like a place of comfort and refuge. With you, he could talk about anything, from the laughters to the deep insides. Over there, the burdens of being an idol is always momentarily lifted.

On the first week of the 2nd month you guys met. He dropped by again, only to find that the lights were off. A little surprised, he went up to the door which pasted a notice

‘the shop will be closed till further notice due to the owner’s personal reasons. Sorry for any inconvenience caused’

His regular high spirits whenever he came by was dampened as he read the notice. Turning back, he headed off.

The next two weeks, he drove by repeatedly, at least 2 times a week, but your shop was still closed.

It made him a little worried, did something happen to you? But seeing how you left this shop behind with just a notice also made him feel a little down, strangely. It made him think that was he nothing but just a customer to you? He had thought you guys were friends, friends with a special bond, one who he could tell everything to, and place so comfortable almost like his home sofa. But the sign that hung coolly by the cafe’s door left no sign of that friendship held.

Whenever he wasn’t working or was by himself, he pondered over what happened to you. Looking at his phone, he suddenly felt a disconnect. You both knew so many things bout each other but not each other’s numbers. There was nothing to call to reach you. Wherever you are, were you thinking about what you left behind?

He thought to himself 

let’s not be too invested into this coincidental friendship

He made up his mind, tomorrow he was going to make a final intentional trip down. If you were still closed, he told himself he would never drop by intentionally again just to check if you were open.

—-

Driving by the next day, his heart was beating fast. And was as if the heavens heard his words, the lights of your cafe were on.

The sign outside still hung closed, but he walked briskly over and stood by the door. You saw him and beckoned him inside.

‘Hey! What’s up with you? Where did you go? ’ Within him he heaved a sigh of relief, finally seeing you again. But his heart wouldn’t stop racing as he waited for your answer. Looking at your face, he can’t help but notice you’ve lost some weight, making him a little worried.

‘Hey Baekhyun ssi, it’s nice seeing you again’

You smiled at him your normal smile and there was no hint of anything extra apart from the normal customer service you gave him. Your lukewarm reply bothered him a little, was he the only one who considered you both as friends? That thought came but left quickly

‘I went home to visit my parents, unfortunately I fell ill. Pneumonia.. Got me in bed for a really long time’

‘Oh no, no wonder you lost some weight? I hope you’re feeling much better already. But you’re not opened today?’

‘Yes I just came back to tidy up this place.’

Not really wanting to leave yet, he offered to clean the place for you, also worried you might not be feeling the most recovered yet.

‘Do you want to have dinner together tonight?’ Baekhyun asked on impulse.

You looked up, a little surprise, but didn’t reject it. 

‘Probably not at restaurants or something though. Delivery , do you mind?’ He added

You were never someone who seemed bothered about such trivial things, as expected you agreed.

Over dinner Baekhyun was his chirpy self again, telling you about all he wanted to say the few weeks you guys didn’t met. You listened to him without much words, only saying words when it mattered, as usual.

As you guys were eating and chatting, there came a point where a comfortable silence settled between you both.

Till you broke it

‘Baekhyun ssi, can I share something with you?’

Though he wasn’t expecting this, he was ready to listen.

‘Go ahead’

‘When I went back, I found out my one and only best friend had died in a car accident. And no one told me because they were afraid I wouldn’t be able to handle it alone in Seoul. He.. was all I had.. when I was bullied because people thought I was weird... when I didn’t fit in... he.. he..’ you couldn’t continue as you burst into uncontrollable tears.

Handling such situations was definitely not something Baekhyun was most comfortable with. Catching him off guard, he internally panicked, Omo, what do I do. What should I say? Deciding the only appropriate thing to do was to pat your back or your head. He reached out and gently comfort you, feeling a little awkward.

After a good 3 minutes you finally calmed down. But still, Baekhyun didn’t exactly know what to say to a crying girl

‘Are you feeling better? Care for some BingBing now? Ice cream cannot solve your problems, but it’s sweet at least ’

You managed a laugh, and Baekhyun went to the kitchen fridge to pull out the ice cream that came with the dinner earlier.

On the drive home, Baekhyun decided that sometimes a friend is the ultimate remedy to sorrow. And as much as you have been there to hear him out, he wanted to pay it back to you too. 

——

But slowly, their comeback preparations were getting more and more hectic. He no longer had the liberty of time to plan what he wanted to do. But today, there was a short 2 hour interval of free time and they were free to do whatever they wanted.

Deciding between whether to crash at dance practice room or to head to your cafe, he decided to do the latter instead. Though he was feeling rather tired, it has been at least 3 weeks since he came by to say hi. He left after telling suho he’ll be back swiftly.

—

Reaching your cafe, he was surprised to see you smiling and laughing so heartily as you were chatting by the counter with a fashionable young man. When you both spoke, you were always giving him polite smiles and laughters, somewhat out of manners? It somehow hurt his pride a little that while he still thought about you when he was away, did you just think of him as a normal customer who would just come and go? It made him feel like his spot in the cafe was easily replaceable.

As he entered, you did not even break away from the conversation you have with the young man. Only until he reached the counter did you look up.

‘Ah! It’s you! It’s been really long! What would you like today ?’

‘6 Iced americanos, thank you’

‘Alright you can take a seat at the corner table first’ handing him his change , you pointed him to the one at the furthest end of the shop.

He came by having the intention to have a short catch up with you, but apart from the exchange of greetings you had pointed him so far away from the counter and busily went off to prepare the amercianos as if he really was just another customer. He laughed a little bitterly and went to sit where you told him to.

When you were done, you brought the coffee to him and dropped to a whisper suddenly.

‘Baekhyun ssi, are you doing well? Sorry I had to cut our conversation short at the counter because of the oppa sitting there. Didn’t want to bring you trouble in case I accidentally say your name’

Smacking himself on the head internally for being so sensitive earlier on, inside of him also wondered what kind of magic does that ‘oppa’ have for you to be so comfortable? The friendship has almost been 3 months but there always seem to be a strange distance between the both of you. Baekhyun knew himself that his personally was not one people found hard to warm up to and neither did he take very long to warm up to others. He was confused, how sometimes your friendship felt so close yet sometimes so far.

‘How have you been? That guy’s your new customer friend?’

‘Not too bad, I started attending some baking classes and in my free time now I just read as usual. Nothing much as changed.

Yeh he’s been coming quite often because he’s back in this area to visit his parents and there’s nothing for him to do’

‘Ahhhh so what kind of customer is he?’ He arrowhead his eyes at him then back to you.

Laughing you replied ‘ just a really funny and nonsensical kind. Kind of just reminds me of my childhood friend I told you about.... oh right, there’s something I want to give you’

Rushing to the kitchen then quickly walking out, you handed him a box. You explained

‘Baekhyun ssi that day I was at a mall and i walked by this tea shop and I dont know why,I thought about you. It’s all without caffeine. I know you’re having your comeback now and you should be really busy. I purposely picked out some that would help you sleep, some that would revitalise you and just some others that could just help you relax.

I’ve kept it for so long but you didn’t come by again. I almost just kept it for myself already.. anyway I’m glad you’re here today so I could pass it to you’

Hearing this from you really made him touched on the inside, but on the outside he didn’t really know let those emotions show. Instead, he merely said

‘Thanks y/n ssi , for thinking about me. I’ll use them well.’ Looking at his watch , he added,

‘I got to go now, see you sometime soon!’

After saying the goodbyes, Baekhyun returned to his car. Setting his Americanos aside, he held the gift in his hand and looked through his driver’s window at you.

At that very moment he finally came to terms with his feelings.

He did not just want a friendship with you, he wanted you as a partner he could tell his everything to, someone that belonged to him and someone he belonged to.

This should make him feel happy and elated, warm and fuzzy. But there was discomfort lying in his heart.

Deep down he knew that desiring anything more than a friendship with you was putting chains on you.

You liked quietness and freedom. But in his world, parts of his life are made public and his freedom was not really freedom at all.

He cannot sink deeper into this, but could he stay away ? His heart clenched.

He tossed the gift aside and drove off.

—

To be continued!!

Sorry for stopping at such an awkward place, but I couldn’t find a good place to stop this at, hahaha.

Anw, I’m sure you guys already know bout baek’s medical condition? My respect and love for baek just hit another level. I really think we are such lucky fangirls to be stanning someone like him. The effort he puts in for us is above and beyond what is required. Sigh. Baek I hope you know we really appreciate you💛

Tag(s): @wooya1224

Edit: Part 2

[bciwasinlove]

how would you analyize or interpret the song walls?cause i‘ve heard a lot of people say it‘s a break up song as it‘s written in past tense and basically saying he‘s stronger now after a break up (maybe even from a toxic relationship), he‘s risen above it and it doesn‘t really sound like a love song about an ongoing romance, does it?

Hi anon this is going to be a long one bc there is no quick answer to this so just know you asked for this.

First let's get one thing straight the ones who claim Walls [the album in general] is a break up album are the "Rads" short for Radical Louies. Essentially they are toxic louies who once were a larry shipper [not even a real larrie] but now hate Harry bc their mad Louis hasn't gotten the same promo and solo opportunities Harry has and some how in their eyes that's Harry's fault. They don't see it was Syco trying to sabotage Louis and in no way is Louis being sabotaged Harry's fault. Rads try to twist the truth and believe Harry left Louis for fame so since they hate Harry they have twisted the meaning of Walls to in their head a break up from a toxic relationship. They also really want LT2 to be a HUGE SHADE break up album which is 100% not the case so don't believe their crap.

Tho I heard you may have sent this same ask to others [who probably ignored you] so there is a chance you are a rad trying to find out what larries believe. Either way if you are a confused larrie or an undercover rad you probably need this info that no one else will bother giving you the time of day to tell you but I myself thought why not I'll answer you.

Second Louis and Harry have been happily in love for 10 years and have not officially broken up. Yes they have had issues like any couple does but it did not stem from eachother their issues stemed from them being forcibly closeted, the stunt gfs and their labels thus their songs are not break up songs but songs about not being able to be free and forced to fake date others when all they want is to publicly be with the one they love.

Now that that is out of the way here's why Walls is about Louis loving one person and one person only since he was 18. I'm doing the whole album [minus TOU] bc it is impossible to state why Walls the song is not a break up song without mentioning the others like Too Young [which rads also claim as a break up song] bc the album as a whole paints the whole picture.

Bree's analysis on Walls

Kill My Mind:

You kill my mind, raise my body back to life and I don't know what I'd do without you now.

KMM is definitely the sexual song of Walls [not No Control type sexual but just we click right from the start sexual] It has the I just met you and we are figuring one another out vibe [both physically and just as people] and how right from the start Louis craves Harry and his attention. It has a similar vibe to Watermelon Sugar which Harry said is about the euphoria of falling in love and the way the other person makes you feel right from the start. Louis in KMM is saying I've just meet someone and they are now all I think about, crave and I don't know how I would be able to live without them.

Don't Let It Break Your Heart:

And I know you left apart of you in New York under your bed in a box, but your doing better.

Flashback to HS1 "Ever Since New York" seems like they both love to mention something happening in NY with their lover. We may never know what happened but it's always a funny coincidence when they mention the same places in their songs almost like their singing about the same situation.

Life gets hard and it gets messed up when you give so much, but it's not enough when the highs to high and the lows to low when you love somone and they let you go.

As I stated before their issues involved the stunts [fake dating women] so when Louis says love someone and they let you go he means when his lover gave into what they were being told to do for the sake of their careers. As young as they were when this all started it's hard not to think they may have fell for the lies being fed to them. So Harry let "Louis go" by being seeing with a ton of women gaining himself the brand of "lady's man" while also being forced to watch Louis be with someone else [Eleanor] and publicly act like that was the one he loved. Harry wrote the song Just a Little Bit of Your Heart which is a prime exactly of those feelings. Harry loves Louis so much but he only gets to love him privately while Eleanor gets to loves him publicly and as Harry wrote a little bit of your love is better then none.

Were driving down a one way road to something better. What hurts you is going to pass you'll be doing better.

This shows they know the pain all the bad things thrown their way won't stick around forever. They will overcome this and one day they will see the light at the end of the tunnel or the rainbow after the storm.

We Made It:

Cause we made it, Underestimated and always underrated. Now we're saying goodbye waving to the hard time yeah it's gonna be already.

Do I need to explain it I would say the title alone and this chorus makes it very clear. Break up who when where how? They had hard ships but NOT from their own doing. WMI is about how decpite all they were put through they made it. Flashback to Harry HS1 tour with Kacey in a rainbow dress at MSG in front of 36k people singing "[their/where] still together still going strong." They want you to know nothing will break them apart no matter how hard anyone tries. We are keeping the bad in the past and moving forward to a better tomorrow.

Share a single bed and tell each other what we dream about. Things we'd never say to someone else out loud.

This reminds me of their Xfactor days or early 1D tour days bc in 1D interviews it was always made clear they would share rooms and also how on the bus Louis bunk was filled with his junk so where did he sleep then? Also there are many former Xfactor contestants that have come out and said they were forced to be in the closet on the show. Flashback to an article claiming the people in charge of the 2010 Xfactor season tried to hide and keep a same sex couple apart wonder who that was? That line is about when they were young and the late nights they spent together wondering how their future was going to go. They were still just big smiles, wide eyed, oblivious young boys when they imagined only good things to come of the future with them and the band.

We were only kids just trying to work it out. Wonder what they'd say if they could see us now?/ Don't know why they put all of this on us when we're so young. Done a pretty good job dealing with it all.

We were only kids [when Louis fell in love with said person] and we're so young reminds me of Harry's song To Be So Lonely where he says "Don't blame me for falling I was just a little boy." They both mention falling in love at a young age and both mention how after all this time they are still just as in love as back then but just a little less naive/oblivious. They are both hinting at a higher person [their label/management] who didn't approve of their love and telling them it wasn't going to work out. Harry going you can't be mad at me I was only a boy and Louis going wonder what would happen if they saw us now meaning look we didn't let you win. They tried so hard to separate Louis and Harry but it didn't work and Louis wants us and THEM especially to know they are still very much together, they handled it as best at they could and they weren't going to let them keep Louis and Harry apart.

Meet you at your uni, cheap drink, drink em all night

This is what we call a stunt line to push a narrative. Harry does stunt songs [Carolina and Cherry] while Louis does stunt lines. This line is suppose to allude to the album being for Eleanor [bc she went to Manchester Uni] but the rest of the album is so clearly not for her. If this song was about a break up from Harry then why would they bother adding in a stunt line about Eleanor when the public story is El and Louis are happily still together with Louis planning to marry her? Unless Walls isn't a break up album and it's very loudly Louis declaring him and Harry are still happily together and they wanted to try and force the image that Louis is happily in love with Eleanor. Also funny how this album is gender neutral and has no she pronouns in it unlike Zayn's new album having she pronouns.

Too Young:

We were to young to know we had everything. Too Young, I wish I could've seen it all along. I'm sorry that I hurt you, darling, no we were to young

This song is all about how when Harry was only 16 and he was 18 [Louis himself saying the song is about meeting the one at 18] he was to young to realize he had the best lover he was ever going to have, he had it all. As I said before issues in songs = management/stunts and this is Illuding to how Louis let them minupulate them and do what it was they wanted aka stunting and forcing Louis to be with Eleanor and Harry have a "lady's image" since he was only 16 and Louis now looking back and realizing he should have fought harder. Louis at the time didn't realize how much all this would hurt Harry having to share Louis [once again Just a Little Bit of Your Heart is Harry's feelings about that] and its once he's older he realizes what he did to hurt the only one who he ever truly loved and it pains him to know he put his lover through that even if it wasn't Louis fault Harry went through that.

I've been looking back a lot lately me and you is all I've ever known. Oh I can't believe I gave in to the pressure. When they said a love like this would never last. I didn't know no better now I realize yeah I realize.

So similar to before he's saying Harry is all he's ever known and him giving in to the pressure was about agreeing to fake date Eleanor and allow them to be heavily closeted. Reflecting back on those days he regrets so much what he agreed to do. They said a love like this wouldn't last is their management/label not agreeing with them being together and how two boys in a boyband marketed towards young women won't last, they won't sell records as an out gay couple with Louis believing their lies for a bit and he now regrets ever thinking they were right. This is a reflection song of not understanding what he had when he was so young but he sees it clearly now and he will never let THEM win he loves Harry and won't ever let him go ever.

Walls:

These high walls, they came up short now I stand taller then them all. These high walls never broke my soul and I watched them all come fallin down for you.

The high walls he refers to is all the assholes who tried to break him, break Harry and tried to ruin his career out of spite. This is towards the ones who told him they would never succeed being as they are a committed gay couple. Louis for a time believed them when they said their love wouldn't last, no one will want to listen to their music as a gay couple but eventually he realized they were wrong and those walls he had up filling him with doubt and insecurities were broken down. He allowed his "high walls" to come down because Harry was worth the effort it took to bring them down.

So this one is a thank you for what you did to me. Why is it that thank you's are often bittersweet? I just hope I see you one day and you say to me, Oh.

This is what one calls a metaphor he does not mean a physical person he means the walls he had up for a long time making him feel so insecure bc of how some of the people around him that made him feel so worthless crushing his spirt for so long. The metaphorical person he is thanking for helping him become the person he is today is the wall he broke down. The hardships he dealt with when he was younger got him to where he is today.

For every question why you were my because

Why am I still fighting?

Why have I not given up yet?

The because to his question is his lover HERE is where he directly refers to his lover. Harry is someone who is worth fighting for and will always be one of the reasons he hasn't stopped fighting. He loves Harry more then anything and will fight until the day he can publicly hold his hand, publicly post pictures of them together, publicly go on dates and publicly declare his love for him.

Habit:

You're the habit that I can't break, you're the feeling I can't put down, you're the shiver that I can't shake, you're the habit that I can't break, you're the high that I need right now.

Written over and over throughout the song these are some of the most important lines he wrote about Harry. It's Louis way of saying even if he wanted to, even if it would be easier for him and Harry he can never let him go. Harry's version of this is in Adore You when he sings "You don't have to say you love me, you don't have to say nothing and you don't have to say you're mine. I'd walk through fire for you just let me adore you like it's the only thing I'll ever do." Harry is saying even if publicly you can never say you love me I know you do and I will do anything for you because I am madly in love and could never let you go. They both would go through hell along side each other then being partially happy and the other not being by their side. Harry is the only one he ever wants to spend his life with and no matter what hardships they are put through there is no scenario where being without each other is a better alternative.

I took some time 'cause I've ran out of energy of playing someone I heard I'm supposed to be but honestly, I don't have to choose anymore

The line of all lines he took time away bc he was tired of the facade of faking what makes him happy, faking loving some girl, faking being anything but himself. He's back now and knows without a doubt who he is and is proud of it. No more confusion, no more lies he loves a curly haired dimpled boy and no one will tell him he can't love him. Harry's version of this is the chorus of Lights Up "All the lights couldn't put out the dark, runnin' through my heart. Lights up and they know who you are, know who you are. Do you know who you are? Shine step into the light, shine so bright sometimes, shine I'm not ever going back." They both tell you they have figured out whi they are and are very proud of who they have become and no one will tell them they can't be anything but themselves. They WILL scream it out loud and proud letting everyone know who they love one day [as if 16 and 18 year old H&L didn't already do that.]

And it's been ages, different stages come so far from Princess Park. I'll always need ya in front of me, in front of me

Oh the line that shocked every larrie I know. When he first sang this song and we first heard this line at a live concert everyone was shocked because we all knew what their was only one meaning to it. It was such a drastic line that the Elounors tried to claim he sang Starbuck [until the official lyrics came out.] Princess Park is the name of the apartment/flat complex all of the 1D boys lived in after the Xfactor BUT Niall, Liam and Zayn had their own apartment/flat while Louis and Harry shared one and they always made it very clear to everyone they met that they lived together.

So in a love song Louis sings about how him and his lover have come so far since their Princess Park days and his lover will always be the one he needs. Putting Harry's fav love song Sweet Creature plus Louis line about his lover together it would read " And, oh, we started two hearts in one home, come so far [since] princess park. I'll always need you in front of me. Wherever I go you bring me home" you do the math here. Their lyrics sink up just as much as their tattoos do.

Always You:

I went to Amsterdam without you and all I could do was think about you and oh-oh-oh I should've known

The Amsterdam line one of those lines that can be fact checked and proven to not be for Eleanor. So Louis took Eleanor to Amsterdam for her birthday at a gay bar no less back in July/August of 2017. Then a week or two later wrote the song Always You leaking a snippet of it to us where the lines of him singing about how he went to Amsterdam without his lover and his lover was all he could think about were heard. If he went with Eleanor then clearly that isn't his lover but we know this. Fast forward 2020 Walls comes out and we FINALLY hear the full song of Always You.

Louis said he only put the song on the album because the fans wanted it but if it was just because of us and the song wasn't THAT important to him why did he leak those lines back in 2017 that could easily be fact checked that the lover he sings about isn't Eleanor? It's like he wanted us to know it's not for Eleanor this line is important. So the fact that almost 3 years later he still put the song out shows the song means a lot to him and even in 2020 the meaning of the song still resonates with him and how it will Always be THIS one person that means everything to him. Funny though how his loudest, easily fact checkable songs [to not be about Eleanor] are the ones he downplays the most about importance to him.

I went to Tokyo to let it go. Drink after drink, but I still felt alone I should've known

When it comes to this song the Amsterdam line is Louis speaking [because he went to Amsterdam without Harry] while the Tokyo line is Harry speaking [because Harry went to Tokyo without Louis] and after Harry came back from Tokyo, Japan Louis was seen wearing a ton of new clothes from Japanese clothing brands. This is both of them saying I may be in a wonderful new place but it's not the same without you here. They are sad and alone and would rather be with each other then traveling around the world.

I'm wastin' my time when it was always you, always you. Chasin' the high, but it was always you, always you

I think this is self explanatory he sees no reason to even think about being with someone else because he knows without a shadow of doubt [thinks he always knew deep down] it was always Harry. There was never going to be anyone else for him but Harry.

I went from LAX to Heathrow. Walked through my door, but it felt nothing like home cause you're not home. Waiting to wrap your legs around me

LA and London are their two main residences and places they tend to go back and forth a lot. When he "goes home" if Harry is not there Louis feels as though it doesn't really feel like home because home to Louis is wherever Harry is. They can travel all around the world, meet a ton of new people but no place and others will ever make them feel fully satisfied unless their lover is by their side.

Fearless:

Cashin your weekend treasures, for a suit and time a second wife. Now I'm not saying that you could have done better just remember that I, I've seen that fire alight.

The first line is a nod to the industry itself and how to get your "weekend tresures" [be famous and earn a lot of money] you have to put up a fake facade, acting and looking the way they want you to because in their eyes if you are not the conventional person Hollywood wants they believe you will not make them the money they desire because we all know they only care about money nothing else. At a cost of the real them they must put on a fake smile, go out there sing doing nothing unconventional and they will get money and fame.

The second line yes they are happily together and Louis doesn't want or believe Harry will find someone else but he has seen Harry when all of this gets to be to much and when Harry puts up a facade of I've never had an issue with all of this Louis reminds him that I've seen you when your not fine, it's ok to not always be fine and I am here for you when things are not rainbows and sunshine.

Tell me do you still remember feeling young? And strong enough to get it wrong in front of all these people? Just for tonight, look inside and spark that memory of you.

Refering back to Xfactor and early 1D days he's asking Harry if he remembers those days together back when they hadn't really gone through hardships yet and all the strength they had during their youth willing to take on the world together. He's asking him to bring that strength back and remember the younger version of himself. He's asking him to not give up because the younger him wouldn't want him to. It's been 10 years and they are still fighting, fighting as hard as they did when they were merely teenagers not knowing what lied ahead but wer happy as long as it meant they had each other in the end.

Now if happiness is always measured by the life we design, the car on the drive then you should feel better then ever but you know as well as I it's all lies.

This line speaks volumes as stated before with Fearless we have references to the industry and even just life in general. From the outside looking in they got money, fame, material things, they have it all and if deciding who is more happy in life was based on those things then they would win but Louis is telling Harry we both know that isn't the case. The industry isn't sunshine and rainbows, they treat people like shit and strip away everything about a person if they don't think their real self will sell. They only want to make a profit off them and don't care about how they feel about any of it. Everything is a lie the truth must be counseled.

Perfect Now:

You say to me your jeans don't fit, you don't feel pretty and it's hard to miss. I wish you could see my point of view as someone staring back at you.

This song is personally underrated to me I love this song. This song is so uplifting when you are feeling insecure and negative about yourself. Louis personally had a certain curly haired boy in mind when he wrote this. He's talking about Harry's insecurities with himself and Louis wishes Harry could see things from his view and how amazing and perfect Harry is to him.

Cause everybody is looking at you now. I guess some queens don't need a crown and I know why. Even when your tears are following now still someone, you're perfect now.

One of those it's definitely not for Eleanor moments. We all know [especially during fine line era] everyone was talking about Harry, knows his name and eyes turn to him when he walks in the room. Louis is so proud of Harry and is happy everyone else sees what he sees but Harry doesn't always see what others see in him and during those times where he is not already Louis is saying I will be right there with you. I am with you through the good and the bad because even when tears are running down his face Harry is still perfect to Louis.

Cause you're the only one when it's said and done. You make me feel like being someone good to you. Even at your worst you steal the scene.

No matter where life takes them, no matter how hard it gets Louis is reassuring Harry he will always be there by his side. At the end of it all when the final act is over and the curtain is closeting he will still be there because there will never be anyone else he wants to be next to at the end of all of this. Louis looks into Harry's eyes he watches all he does and is intrance wanting nothing more then being the one to be there when he is down and always being the who makes the pain go away even if for a moment.

Defenseless:

I hate to say, but I do we're sleeping on our problems like we'll solve them in our dreams. We walk up early morning and they're still under our sheets.

*Sigh* this is reality setting in things aren't perfect. In their line of work, being who they are, being a closeted gay couple things aren't going to be perfect 100% of the time. Most of the time they would rather ignore all the shit they are forced to indure but Louis realizes just ignoring it all won't make it go away he will wake up each morning next to Harry knowing those issues will always be around by neither fault of their own. He hopes one day they will get to be a happily open couple who posts pics online, goes out on public dates and gets to live the domestic life they always wanted but right now that just isn't their reality. Their reality is I can only look at you for more then 5 seconds or touch you when no one is around to notice.

Been up all night, all night running my lines but it's only the truth. Been up all night not sure how to say this right got so much to loose. / You just keep on building up your fences but I've been so defenseless.

Another metaphor here Louis wondering how to bring this up to Harry and not upset him. The last thing Louis ever wants is for him to be the reason Harry has a frown upon is wonderful face. Harry is more the one to bottle up and ignore the negative things while Louis is the more practical one and he knows he has a ton to loose [Harry and his love] if he doesn't go about this situation right.

No you don't have to keep on being strong for you and me acting like you feel no pain I know you do. And I can't get inside your head when you're lost in your pride but you don't have a thing to prove.

Harry is the one who bottles up his pain, puts on the fake smiles, and makes everyone believe he is perfectly fine. He acts like he can handle what he is forced to indure 100% of the time but Louis sees through that and just wants him to open up more. He knows Harry feels just as much pain as he does and wishes he wouldn't hide it and pretend everything is always fine. Louis wants to be able to help Harry through the pain and to let know he will always be there for him no matter what so don't pretend your always fine just to make others around him, make Louis feel better.

I hope I'm not asking to much just wanna be loved by you. And I'm to tired to be tough just wanna be loved by you.

Louis is tired of pretending, wishes everyone understood, wishes what he is asking for wasn't to much. All he wants is to be loved by Harry and live the domestic life he always invisioned with Harry and no one else but his live is not that simple.

Only The Brave:

Pour mercy, mercy on me, set fire to history. I'm breaking my own rules, I'm crying like a fool. It's a church of burnt romances and I'm to far gone to pray. It's a solo song and it's only for the brave.

I'm sure you understand Louis is gay but if you didn't this line right here is all you need to understand that. No straight man is going to write or sing those lines. He's gone down a path of self discovery and figuring himself out he knows he is and he is to far gone to turn back now but he has no desire to even if he could turn back. He is proud of who he is and doesn't care what anyone else thinks of him.

If the truth tell, darling, you fell, like their ain't enough dying stars in your sky. It's a tell tale and it's only hello, hello, no goodbyes.

It's only hello no goodbyes meaning the confusion, the is this for life between Louis and Harry questions are gone. They aren't turning back, they aren't saying goodbye, they are only saying hello to what lies ahead. The truth is clear, their story is clear, they fell for one another and Harry metaphorical speaking fell for Louis in a way where his star shines brighter then ever just by being with him.

Pour mercy, mercy on me, I'll fall upon my knees and they'll say, I told you so come on when you know you know. All the lonely shadows dancing from the cradle to the grave.

When you know you know they knew right from the start it's me and you until the end. Some won't agree but in the end that does not matter to Louis because he only cares about Harry being by his side. He will not apologize for falling in love he loves who he loves and that is it.

We Made It Directors Cut MV:

If the lyrics alone don't tell you the full story then the music video mini movie should. It sums up everything I explained. Louis being forced to do things he doesn't want, it effecting his relationship to the point their drowning [Harry in Falling MV] but manage to survive. Louis lover never speaking but the girl with ties to the evil one in charge does until eventually Louis breaks free from the man in charge controlling him and Louis finally gets to run away with his lover because he made sure they would make it in the end.

Ending:

Walls is about self discovery, learning to overcome your insecurities "breaking down your walls" no matter how hard it may be and Louis understanding he met the one at 18 and how Harry will always be worth fighting for, THEY will always be worth it bc they knew even as young as they were they were going to get married, have kids and grow old together. So you still want to tell me how any song on Walls is about a break up or Louis moving on from Harry because I certainly don't see it. Walls is Louis perspective on their 10 year relationship and his support and love towards Harry if you want Harry's perspective and his support and love toward Louis you would have to dive into HS and FL but that's a whole other analysis.

They have not given up on each other even if at times it would have been easier they didn't so I will never give up on them. They continue to fight I have been in this fandom supporting them for 10 years watching their continous fight and I will be here another 10 years supporting them if that is how long it takes for them to get the life they knew they wanted when they were only 16 and 18.

[httpsfelicity]

“In a black dress, she’s such an actress” - Harry Styles × Model Reader AU (Part 2/?)

Summary - Harry meets a model downtown and falls for her quickly, leading the public to think that it’s a pr stunt. Unsure of what to think, the reader plays along, not knowing that Harry is unaware of the rumours.

For @cruizmanadu, @stephaniemalvie!, @kissessfordraco Xx

A/N - Part two! Thank you sooo much for the feedback on part one, I never expected it! Glad you guys like it so far. If you haven’t read part one, click here x Once again, if you’d like a part 3 / have suggestions / ect, just send a DM or ask! Here you go babessss :) 

Harry Styles: Hi

Y/n <3: Hi

Harry Styles: Why are you awake, it’s 3am?

Y/n <3: I could ask you the same thing, you messaged me first!

Harry Styles: You’re right. What’s up?

Y/n <3: Watching TV, you?

Harry Styles: Not much. Listening to The Beatles, y’know, normal night things.

Y/n <3: Never really got around to listening to them personally

Harry Styles: Omg reported and BLOCKED.

Y/n <3: Omg noooooo come back 

Harry Styles: Kiddinggggggg, but I have to make you listen to one of their albums sometime

Harry Styles: Are you free tomorrow?

Y/n <3: I have a shoot all day. I’m free the next day tho

Harry Styles: We could maybe do something then? The park?

Harry Styles: Unless you have a better idea, of course

Y/n <3: No that sounds great! What time?

Harry Styles: 7?

Y/n <3: Sure! :)

Harry Styles: Now, GO TO SLEEP!

Y/n <3: Only if you do!

Harry Styles: Okayyyy, goodnight!

Y/n <3: Goodnight!

Seen: 3:14am

As you crawled into bed, a feeling of satisfaction spread through you. He wanted to spend more time with you - that ought to be a good sign, right? “Maybe this could work out, after all,” was the last thing you thought before you fell asleep.

The next day was the usual whirlwind of events that occurred every shoot day - wake up early, take a cab over to the location (That particular day’s mystery place happened to be an old art studio), take another cab with some assigned lady to get you ready, another cab back to the location, then a whole day of photos. It was all a blur to you, so when the head of the whole operation thanked you at the end of the day, you were glad it was all over. Of course you adored your job, but considering the amount of sleep you’d gotten last night (Which, by the way, you did not regret one bit) you were thankful that in 45 minutes you’d be fast asleep.

What you did not expect, however, was for that little power nap to turn into a full 14 hours. By the time you woke up the next day, it was the crack of 11am. You sat up frantically, taking in your surroundings. You were still wearing your street clothes - jeans and a blouse - and a quick glance in the mirror revealed you hadn’t taken off your extravagant makeup, either. Trust me, it was not a pretty sight. You scrambled for your phone, and aside from all of the usual twitter notifications, DM requests, and messages from Ella and Harry (Which you were over the moon about), you noticed that you had 4 missed calls. From, none other than Harry.

You quickly clicked on his contact and dialed up his number. After a few rings, he picked up.

“Hi!” He said cheerfully.

“Hey,” you laughed. “Why did you call me? Four times, to be exact?”

“Just wanted to make sure we were still on for tonight. But then I got worried when you didn’t answer, so I called again to make sure everything was alright.”

“And again, and again.”

“Correct,” he laughed.

“Rough photoshoot. I was exhausted, and it wasn’t all that exciting. By the time I got home, I was asleep. Literally. I slept for 14 hours straight.”

Harry laughed so hard on the other end that you had to move your phone away from your ear for a couple of seconds so he could calm down. “Oh, wow, I... well, I guess it’s not that funny. That’s awful. You should’ve gotten more sleep the night before!”

“I would’ve, but somebody just had to message me at 3am!”

Cue another round of laughter. “Oh my god... look, I’m sorry, I really am! I didn’t know you had to wake up so early. I won’t message you so late into the night anymore, I promise.”

“Don’t promise that! I quite liked it. Besides, all of those shoots are the same. Nothing worth remembering, if you ask me.”

“Alright, alright, fine. But are we still on for later? If you’re still tired, we can reschedule...”

“No! After twice the amount of sleep I usually get, I feel like I could run a marathon. Seven?”

“Yup.”

“Okay. Gives me enough time to adjust myself to reality.”

This sent both of them into bouts of laughter.

“Alright, well, I’ve gotta go, but I’ll see you then?”

“You’ve got it! Bye!”

“Bye! And for the love of god try not to fall asleep this time, yeah?” He cracked himself up.

“I’ll try!” You replied as you hung up. You sighed, smiled, and then leaned against your headboard, though not for long. You had things to do - number one, get a shower.

Flash forward a few hours, and you were all set. You were wearing a pair of jeans and a blouse, similar to yesterday’s outfits, just with less smeared makeup and bedhead. You had even managed to listen to a few albums while you were doing your hair. You quickly ate a salad for supper, confirmed the meeting spot with Harry, then headed out the door.

You arrived 10 minutes early, and to your surprise, Harry was already there again. 

“How did you get here before me?” You laughed as you walked up to him. “I left even earlier than last time, specifically to race you!”

“Oh, I have my ways,” he grinned. “So, would you like to know what I have planned?” 

“Enlighten me,” you prompted as you began walking past the bushes and flowerbeds with him, admiring his bold, light purple flared pants and white top.

“Well, first we walk through the park. Then, I have a reservation booked for La Sedbe Hyudge. If that sounds okay to you, that is.”

La Sedbe Hyudge was one of the most exclusive clubs in New York. Reservations were crazy expensive, and that’s not including the price of the food and drinks.

“Oh, Harry, you really didn’t ha-”

“No, no, don’t worry about it. The reservation’s already made; there’s no turning back now,” he laughed.

You laughed along with him. “Well, we can just split the final bill.”

“No,”

“But-”

“Don’t worry about it!” 

You sighed. “Okay,” you finally agreed. “Well, anyways, tonight sounds like it will be great fun. Thank you.”

Harry nodded, looking around. You had to admit it, the scenery of the park was very nice. The gardener(s) here must be paid awfully well.

“So, I listened to Fine Line.”

Harry perked up. “Oh?”

“It was - and I’m not just saying this because I li- we’re friends - but it was incredible. I’ve never heard anything like it.”

Harry was trying to hide his smile, but he was failing miserably. “Well, that’s good,” he concluded nonchalantly. 

“No, really! I have Golden stuck in my head. It’s beautiful. And don’t even get me started on Lights Up.”

“You didn’t see the music video, did you?”

“..Yeah?”

“Oh, wow.”

“It was ARTSY!” You laughed, Harry clearly getting embarrassed. “No, in all honestly, it was great.”

“Well, I’m glad you think that,” he smiled. “I wish I could say the same to you, but you don’t sing, obviously.”

“Not my forte, honestly. I was in choir in elementary, but that’s pretty much it. Never really had any interest in the preforming arts. No offense.”

“None taken. I’ve always liked singing, but I didn’t think I’d pursue it as a career. I was very happy at my old job, thank you very much.”

“What was your old job?”

“...”

“...”

“I used to work in a bakery.”

“No way!” “That’s adorable,” you thought as the two of you rounded a corner of the path.

“Yes way! Not to brag, but I was very good at making cinnamon rolls.”

“Now, isn’t that something.”

“That’s not all - macaroons.”

“Oh my god, marry me.”

You continued goofing off for the rest of the walk. You talked about Netflix shows and whether Summer or Winter was the superior season in the taxi, and the best way to make Kraft dinner on the sidewalk. By the time you walked into the restaurant and sat down, you were discussing the importance of a good facemask.

“I don’t know. I just can’t believe you do them.”

“I can’t believe you don’t.”

“Why should I?”

“Do you want me to go over the health benefits again?”

You sighed. “No. I just do not have the patience.”

“For me to explain it again or facemasks in general?”

You smiled. “Both.”

Harry laughed rather loudly, gaining a few odd looks from some stuck-up diners. “You’re lucky you’re cute, y/n.”

Before you could respond, a waiter walked over to your table. “And what could I get for the couple this evening?” He asked.

You and Harry looked at eachother and tried to supress laughter.

“Well, I don’t know about my husband here,” you start, looking over at Harry with a grin. He’s staring back at you and you are positive that he’s gonna blow it at any second, but you decide to keep going, “But I’ll have a glass of red wine.”

“Whatever you want, dear, so I guess I’m driving,” Harry shrugged. “I will have water, please.”

The waiter nodded. “I’ll be right back.”

 As soon as he was out of earshot, the two of you burst out laughing.

“That.. was.... amazing!” Said Harry between laughs.

“I know right!” You agreed. “We have to keep it going all night.”

“YES,” he nodded as a group of teenage girls walked past the table, also laughing uncontrollably.

Then, the waiter returned. “For the lady,” he said as he placed down a glass of  wine. You immediately picked it up and took a sip. 

“For the main course, I’ll have the steak, please,” said Harry in his very-best fancy voice.

“I too,” you said, giggling and taking another sip.

The waiter nodded and headed back to the kitchen. The two of you laughed again. 

Just then, you felt your phone buzz in your purse. “It’s probably nothing,” you thought, choosing to ignore it. But then it went off again. And again. And again.

“You should probably get that,” said Harry, looking at your bag.

“Nah, it’s probably nothing.”

“Alright. I gotta run to he bathroom, and then I’m gonna order a drink for myself, okay?”

“Okay,” you said as you watched him get up. “Bring me back a glass too!”

You watched him walk over to the mens room. Your phone buzzed. He pushed open the door. Your phone buzzed. The door shut behind him. You reached down and pulled out your phone.

Ella: Oh my god

Ella: Y/n

Ella: Where are you right now

Ella: Are you with anybody?

Ella: ?????

Ella: Y/N

Ella: CHECK UR PHONE

You quickly typed up a response, although you were confused as to why she was so worried all of a sudden.

Y/n: I’m at the Sedbe Hyudge with Harry, why?

Ella: *Sent a set of photos*

Ella: Check twitter for more.

You clicked on the photos. The first was a screenshot of an update account, saying that you and Harry were in the park. Then, another tweet from the same account, saying you were at this restaurant. Then, photos of you in the park. And then, photos of you at the restaurant. Under that were screenshots of twitter users.

@Cocopopstyles: I just want Harry to take me on a date like he does with y/n, is that TOO MUCH TO ASK. They’re TOO CUTE.

@Y/nxxxxstyles: ANOTHER WIN FOR THE SHIPPERS THEY’RE AT THE SEDBE HYUDGE DHHHVDHBDCHUDB YES

@HSDaily: Ew lmfao she’s so ugly PLS 

@Stylessssmaple: “I ain’t saying she’s a golddigger, but she ain’t messing with no broke....”

@LaylaHoran: I heard that they were talking to the waiter like they’re an actual couple. A few girls overheard it, idk their @’s tho.

@LarryStylinsonobvs replying to @LaylaHoran: Really?? Omg that’s pretty quick tbh. Weren’t they first seen together days ago?

@LaylaHoran replying to @LarryStylisonobvs: Yeah apparently. Idk what’s going on. Is she a PR stunt or not???

@LarryStylinsonobvs replying to @LaylaHoran: Not to be a bluegreener but she could be a beard... we’ve gotten so much content from them in the past 72 hours like.... are u gonna tell me there’s no contract in there at all?????

@Y/nsflowers: Y/n looks so good in the new pap photos pLEASE MARRY ME MA’AM.

@Y/L/Nsummertime: Y/n is over lmfao can she please cut the bullshit. Wbk she’s in it for the money. The job, the PR stunts, the boyfriend...

@TheDailyPoolsideNews: Model y/n and ex-boyband star spotted out in the town! Will this be the next Hollywood snoozefest?

There was more, but Harry was already back at the table, carrying two glasses and setting them down, smiling. All of a sudden, you had this really sick feeling. You couldn’t look him in the eyes. You took your drink as he sat down. Not wanting to say anything in case it ruined the night, you took a sip and put your phone back in your purse.

“Everything alright?”

You looked up. “Yeah.”

Harry stared at you. You stared back jokingly, trying to break the tension. Harry’s phone started ringing. “Oops,” he frowned, “thought I turned this off...”

“You can take it, it’s okay. I checked my phone before. Plus, I need to use the washroom.”

“Okay,” he smiled as you stood up, smiling back. As you were walking away, you heard him talking to whoever was on the other end of the line. “Hey, Nial- what? No, I am, why-”

You pushed into the womens room and locked yourself in a stall. “What the hell is going on?”

You sit there for a few minutes, trying to collect your thoughts and give Harry some time to finish his conversation. Someone had seen the two of you at the park and in the restaurant, so what? Some people liked you, and some people didn’t. Okay, that’s understandable. Some people hated you. That’s fine, you don’t care. But people still think you and Harry are a PR stunt. This is only your second date! And it’s not eve a date! It’s just a... you put your head in your hands, then sit up, not wanting to smudge your mascara. You reach for your phone, only to remember you left it in your purse, which was currently on the floor next to your chair next to Harry. God.

And, to make matters worse, he had gotten a phonecall and from what you had heard when you were walking away, he sounded worried. Perfect! That was probably his management. Or, better yet, one of his friends doing the same thing Ella had done to you. Suddenly, you jumped up and walked back out to the table. He was fiddling around with his napkin. When he saw you, his face lit up. You didn’t buy it.

“Hi, sorry, it was just one of my friends. He wanted to t-”

“Oh, it’s fine,” you said, politely cutting him off.

Harry was taken back by this, but not for long. He wasn’t fazed easily. “Oh, okay. That’s good. Sorry for taking so long. Oh, and I don’t want this anymore, so if you want it, you can fill yours up. Otherwise, I’m just gonna give it to the waiter when he comes back.”

You never drank too much. You knew three glasses would be awful for you. But you took his and filled yours up, because “I don’t want to waste anything. This place is so expensive.”

Soon after, the waiter dropped off your meals. Harry was speaking less, more unsure of himself than before, but you didn’t notice. You made polite small talk, but it wasn’t like your antics from before. Yet when you were leaving, you did not split the bill. Harry still paid.

When you walked outside, it was dark. You hadn’t expected it. You laughed. Harry laughed. “Let’s wait over here for a taxi, yeah?”

You nodded and followed him. You sat on a bench. Harry messaged somebody. You swung your feet a little. Harry took a call. You stayed seated, watching people walk by. Harry came back over and helped you walk to the taxi, arm around your back. You tried to tell him you didn’t need his help, but he didn’t listen. 

Harry gave the taxi driver his address. You gave him yours, but he didn’t listen. You spoke up again, but Harry told you not to worry; you could spend the night with him. You nodded.

Harry helped you out of the taxi. You didn’t fight back. You tried to pay for the taxi, but he wouldn’t take your money. You held his hand as you walked through the doors of his apartment building, got in the elevator, got to his apartment. He sat you down on the couch and went off to his room. He came back shortly after.

“I don’t have any pyjamas for you.”

“Why would I need pyjamas?” You laughed a little, and then a lot.

Harry smiled. He went back to his room and came back with a shirt still wrapped in plastic and a bag.

“Here. The bathroom is over there. There’s makeup wipes on the counter.” He helped you up and you walked over. 

“Why do you have makeup wipes? Do you wear makeup?”

“Yep!” Said Harry. “Just turn the lock to the left. It’s tricky sometimes, try it a few times if it doesn’t work, yeah?”

“That’s so cool, can you show me your makeup sometime?”

“Yep! Maybe after you get your pyjamas on.”

“Really?”

“Mmhm!”

You shut the door and turned the lock, though you doubted you’d need it. You took off your fancy clothes and put on a pair of brand new too-big black sweatpants and a too-big pink t-shirt. Why did you need pyjamas again? Harry hadn’t answered. He wasn’t sending you home in pyjamas, was he? Uh oh.

You walked out. Harry was in the kitchen. “Do you need anything?”

“A drink.”

“Water?”

“Wine, dummy.” You cracked up at this.

“You’ve already had more than enough. C’mon, let’s go to the living room.” He grinned. 

“Whyyyyyy?”

Harry smiled patiently. “C’mon, y/n. We can watch a movie or something.”

“Okay. Wait - can I just have orange juice instead?”

“Of course.” He grabbed a can of juice and then walked into the living room. You followed. There were pillows and blankets on the couch, and Disney+ was set up.

“Ooou, fancy,” you laughed.

Harry crawled under the blankets. You did too. He laughed. So did you. Why were you even upset with him in the first place? You couldn’t remember. Harry grabbed the remote and turned on some show you’ve never heard of before. The Mandalorian, whatever that was. You leaned your head on Harry’s shoulder. It wasn’t even boring - why were you falling asleep? 

Harry closed his eyes - he was tired, too, but for different reasons. You listened to his breathing get slower. You held him tightly. You held him back. 

“Friends don’t hold friends that way,” you thought to yourself. “But who cares?”

You fell asleep. So did he.

You forgot about the stunt rumours. So did he.

He forgot about how his friend called him in a panic, not wanting this relationship to get ruined for him like the last one, and the one before that, and the one before that. About how he really, really liked you, but couldn’t act on it. He wanted to give you the world. Yes, he fell too quickly, too easily, but who could blame him?

And you forgot about Ella in the same panic. She didn’t want this to get ruined for you, of course, because this was your first shot, your first love (Although not that she’d know - you had to admit you had been a bit distant with her since you met Harry.) She didn’t want you to fall into the hands of the public eye. She wanted to make sure you were safe. She wasn’t sure if you should trust Harry, so of course she should be worried.

But you trusted him.

And he trusted you.

And everything is okay.

Until 3am.

A/N PT 2 - While you’re waiting for part 3 (which is definitely coming btw!) check out my other fics through this masterlist HERE!

[fmdjaewonarchive]

hi there famed, its ur least favorite idiot jamie again, back on my usual bs of saying im going to get my shit together, dipping to go on hiatus and then returning with a plotting call. school has just been kicking my ass and i’m a little bitch. i have yet to give a rundown on my muses (jaewon/yuanjun/minah/yena) during q2 so i’ll be leaving a rundown of that below the cut and with that offering hopefully some plotting ideas, i mainly need more stuff on jaewon and minah but anyting is welcome really. if you wanna work some plotting stuff out pls like this post, slide into my ims or just hmu on d*sc*rd (which, feel free to ask for if you don’t have it yet!!!)

first things first i have a bunch of base prompts available (here!)

jaewon:

april was largely spend finishing up his solo projects and preparing for unity’s comeback

also there was that champion concert in japan that should be a big deal but truly jaewon didn’t give a fuck

from march 3 - june 3 unity will be promoting make a wish and honestly jaewon is vibing

resonance does really well, he’s surprisingly not naked on stage for unity standards and he just gets to first and foremost focus on unity and their progress so he’s super content

he’s still super busy tho, between unity stuff he has an upcoming portal song which as will be revealed is more or less an elaborate teaser for his first solo concert which will be held in july just after his birthday

it doesn’t take up an awful lot of his time yet but preparations are starting up and it’s definitely on his mind already

he also has an ost for sweet home coming up which, doesn’t rlly offer a lot of plotting wise but considering that its first ost it is an indicator that dimensions are more dedicated than ever to keep him in the public eye and talked about after his last album did pretty well, which is a good sign for him and his creative freedom

but yeah i think... we’re getting generally happy and content jaewon again for a bit? which means he’ll be less awful and snappy to deal with

yuanjun:

left & right has wrapped up by now and yuanjun had fun, it wasn’t very challenging but he had fun

charm seems very busy with japanese promotions and stuff but it doesn’t seem to be taking up that much time

while other charm members are busier with doing stuff for their personal careers yuanjun is just... kind of not

the radio show is still going steady but that’s the most consistent thing

he tries to do some more stuff for his youtube channel, on the one hand because he has time on his hands and wants to do cool things

on the other hand because he likes proving he’s more amusing than the base online youtube channel (he’s kidding... kinda... not rlly)

so yeah, relatively a lot of free time, will be used to annoy his friends

minah: 

loads of lipstick things 

first minah is ticket one way’ing after that they quickly move on hurt locker prep

she doesn’t love either comeback but they’re nice, she enjoys the time with her members and is proud of them as ever

there is a lot of switching back and forth between her own work and lipstick music 

she’s releasing a single in late may that she’s working very hard for

and then there is her first full album all the way down in august but she’s already doing songwriting for it 

anyone willing to take them to some nice inspirational spots to aid the songwriting is very fair

apart from that minah might be hard to get a hold off

when you do, she’ll be very scatterminded and all over the place, seemingly constantly busy trying to keep up with anything though she will claim it’s fine, no stress at all

yena:

good news, the world of the married starts airing early may

bad news, gal.actic has a comeback like one week later

she won’t be allowed to bask much in her newly found acting fame and will spend all of fri.sat.sun complaining about how she has better shit to do

there is we are legendary for collaborate as well which, again, yena doesn’t care for being here, she just wants to go home

but back to the first point, the world of the married does rlly well for her, like, really well, earning her a lot of recognition outside of gal.actic

ofc she’ll be dealing with some shit ab how she’s perfect for the role of a spoiled homewrecker breaking up a married couple but whatever yena is too busy being rich and sexy to care

she will be in super high spirits about it, will take talking about the drama over talking about gal.actic any day of the year

will take any excuse to celebrate the drama’s succes rlly

just good yena wild party girls antics now she feels a bit more secure in what she’s doing and acting seems more and more viable as a sustainable future

[bisluthq]

hi I was wondering what your favourite sapphic songs of Taylor's are? cause kaylors make such a big deal of the 'male perspective' in songs like our song, love story, mine. and I agree that wanting to experience that is gay in itself. but those songs just feel so straight country love songs that I really cannot see them as sapphic, particularly given that she also sings from the 'female perspective' to the man. so I wondered which songs feel most sapphic to you?

Ohh boy yeah the male perspective (except Betty where it’s gay in concept and feels very like when 15 year old me was obsessed with Blue Mountain State lmao) never screams gay to me. Let’s do a roundup of sapphic lyrics and themes.

In Teardrops on My Guitar, Taylor says: “Drew walks by me... Can he tell that I can't breathe? And there he goes, so perfectly... The kind of flawless I wish I could be.” Now the whole song’s unseen pining is pretty gay to me. Like I say, there are unrequited straight songs but it’s very like... “why aren’t you understanding that I’m right here? How can you be so blind?” In Teardrops Taylor seems very aware that this person (well boy in the song) won’t ever notice her.

And sure we could say “well she has poor self-confidence” but then there’s that line in the bit I chose: “The kind of flawless I wish I could be” - why is she comparing herself to a boy? Do I want to be you or do I want to fuck you is such a big mood for queer women especially young queer women. I dunno, like my first few late elementary/early middle school crushes (and my first few crushes were on girls) were very like: “Do I want to be her? Do I want to be her best friend? Or do I want her to hold my hand? And why does her holding my hand make my heart beat faster and seem to have no effect on her?” There’s a definite way queer women compare ourselves to the object of our affections that straight women don’t seem to do that makes “my crush is the kind of flawless I wish I could be” feel extremely sapphic to me.

Oh bonus one from Teardrops: “The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star / He's the song in the car I keep singing. Don't know why I do” - why doesn’t she know? Like what’s confusing about this situation? She likes this dude why is it such a big fucking deal that she does? And again why does she want to be like him?

Anyway yeah that whole song.

Also Invisible is gay af. Like if you reverse the pronouns it’s the universal queer woman’s story of being in love with your friend. And this bitch is into some dude who isn’t anywhere near good enough for her and your affections are invisible but if she only knew - and she won’t - the two of you could have something beautiful together.

Stay Beautiful also reads gay but apparently she wrote it in the fourth grade so maybe her vocab was just bad idk.

On that album, Tied Together with a Smile and I’m Only Me When I’m With You are formally, officially, according to Tay’s explanations about her female friends btw. If you listen to those two songs and then the first two I listed they’re... not that fucking different lmao. It’s that same idea of “you get me and I just want you to be happy”. It’s all just... gay...

Fearless is probably one of the least gay albums overall IMO (tho I’m open to people making stuff gay) but it does give us the title track which is very fucking gay lol so it makes up for the number of straight sounding songs on here. First there’s this bit:

We're drivin' down the road

I wonder if you know

I'm tryin' so hard not to get caught up now

But you're just so cool

Run your hands through your hair

Absent-mindedly makin' me want you

Man “I wonder if you know” is exactly that feeling I was describing like, I wonder if you realize this is more than friendship? I wonder if you know that I want you. And the “you’re just so cool” isn’t as explicitly “I want to be you” but it’s also got some of that shared energy. This person is so cool that them running their hand absent-mindedly through their hair is making her feel some type of way and yet she’s not sure if the person knows that. Now why wouldn’t this extremely cool guy know that the girl he’s giving a lift to is possibly interested?

Then there’s this bit:

My hands shake

I'm not usually this way

But you pull me in and I'm a little more brave

It's the first kiss,

It's flawless,

Really something,

It's fearless.

Why does this first kiss require so much bravery? It’s not her first ever because “I’m not usually this way” implies she has been in a similar position before. And then:

And I don't know why but with you I'd dance in a storm in my best dress

Fearless

“I don’t know why” - well because you like this person! Girl, you’re into them. Oh, you’re not sure why because it’s a girl? Also lbr discussing clothes with your crush/partner is a very gay girl thing so just that addition of “my best dress” in the context of the rest of this incredibly gay song is... gay...

Oh and a bonus point:

'Cause I don't know how it gets better than this

You take my hand and drag me head first

Fearless

Making that big a deal of handholding and saying it requires bravery is, you guessed it, gay af. 

Untouchable also delivers some gems: “Untouchable like a distant diamond sky / I'm reaching out and I just can't tell you why / I'm caught up in you” - I mean this is that whole vague confused forbidden vibes I spoke about before and the “And when you're close I feel like coming undone”. For me, it’s the fact that this person’s mere presence is enough to make her undone and she’s begging for a “taste of Heaven” feels... gay...

Jump Then Fall is also pretty damn gay to me. It’s got that dangerous “this could be dangerous” thing going on (“I had time to think it all over and all I can say is come closer”) but it’s also positive and... she’s saying jump and I’ll catch you which... like I get that it could be metaphorical but generally with het couples the dude would do the catching. Like if it was just that it’d not be that gay but again, the whole thing... is...

Whoa, oh, I need you baby

Don't be afraid, please,

Jump then fall

Jump then fall into me

Baby, I'm never gonna leave you

Say that you wanna be with me too

'Cause I'mma stay through it all

So jump then fall

Jump then fall, baby,

Jump then fall into me, into me

Like why are they both so scared? Why is she convincing herself and this person? What’s the danger? Is it just meant to be a “loss of virginity” song?

Then there’s the catching bit I mentioned:

The bottom's gonna drop out from under our feet

I'll catch you, I'll catch you

When people say things that bring you to your knees

I'll catch you

Idk man. It’s gay.

By the way for two unrequited songs that fundamentally feel straight to me, look at The Other Side of the Door and You Belong With Me. I’m not saying you can’t have queer readings. But both of them have that “blame” angle to the guy’s lack of interest or inability to requite her feelings. Like she’s saying “I won’t tell you what I want or that I want you but you should figure it out ya big dummy!” which is inherently different to that “I know this is completely pointless and I’m barking up the wrong tree” energy of the other songs I mentioned. “I’m worried you’ll hurt me” songs are also different to “if you stand close to me I’ll completely fall apart but I can’t let you see” of... like... Untouchable.

Hey Stephen has the “I can't help it if you look like an angel” line but it’s generally straight for me because:

Hey, Stephen,

I could give you fifty reasons

Why I should be the one you choose.

All those other girls—

Well, they're beautiful,

But would they write a song for you?

Do you see what I mean it’s like “I know you might not want me but you should” and that’s not a sapphic vibe. Like that’s to me what makes her gay sounding songs so much gayer like they capture a very specific feeling - being confused on if you want to be her, be her friend or fuck her dumb ass.

On Speak Now Taylor adds another type of gayness into her repertoire. She does the “I’m singing about a guy but it’s all about a girl” thing in Better Than Revenge. Now I know she has been called out a lot for this and she herself has now said obvi girls don’t steal your boyfriend BUT that’s not the part I find interesting. It’s shit like: “She thinks I'm psycho 'cause I like to rhyme her name with things” - like girl, that is psycho. Being obsessed with the fact that she is wearing vintage dresses is weird. And Taylor does this in the title track with her lengthy descriptions of the bridge compared to ZERO description of the guy. Not even “looking so handsome” - like there’s nothing. But the bride is “floating down the aisle like a pageant queen”.

Idk this is only three albums and only like my favorite gay bits and I already have so many and I haven’t even gotten to Treacherous 😭 I think I should make a hashtag for this and carry on later.

The point is, for me, it’s not about her singing a back and forth with a guy and a girl. It’s capturing supremely sapphic wlw feelings that I’ve never seen a straight female songwriter or musician convey, even where I’ve loved their music and felt it strongly resonated with me for other reasons.

[steponmepinkjun]

I NEVER FINISHED MY STORY OMG. ok so i left off at being too proud to tell my friend she was right and kpop fucked hard. the difference between u and me is that i’m too good of a liar. too good. i kept up the “i hate kpop it’s cringe” facade for ALMOST TWO WHOLE YEARS, I SHIT YOU NOT. why? bc my dumb ass, extra ass, dramatic ass self thought “ok if i’m gonna have to deal with the embarrassment of admitting i’m wrong, i better do it in such an extra ass way it’ll knock ur socks off so hard that YOULL be the one embarrassed not me.” the original plan was to learn the entire choreography to bts dope, bc it’s the song that she told me to listen to and inevitably the song that got me into them, but later switched to bts fire bc i saw too many of those “choreo matches w any song” videos, and then her birthday party came up. and here’s the real kicker. her birthday is April Motherfuckin Fools. so it would be So Perfect for me to reveal my kpopism as a birthday present And a april fools prank in one. so i was Set on the Reveal being on april 1st, but the day rolls around and god that choreo is so fucking hard and i am Not a dancer. never have been. so i abandon that and go ykno what… i’ll do it Next Year. BC MY BITCHASS WAS LIKE NO THE MOMENT IS TOO PERFECT TO DO IT ON A NORMAL ASS DAY ITS GONNA BE ON APRIL FOOLS ON HER GODDAMN BIRTHDAY OR NOT AT ALL. a year rolls by, i’ve told most of our friends except her and they’re all in on it, i’d made so many subtle kpop references to her without her realising they were fully intentional and had too many scares where she almost figured me out but i lied my way out of it, and i’d given up on showing off with choreography bc i couldn’t make that shit look good. i’m not a dancer. i am, however, a rapper, and a damn good one, so i inhaled the agust d mixtape and decided i’d just rap the eminem of kpop’s anthem at her face. in korean. and change the lyrics at the end (if u haven’t listened to agust d, the bridge repeats “i’m sorry” a lot) to “i’m sorry i kept this from u for so long” and “i’m sorry i actually ult got7 not bts” (this was like the april after skz debuted ok i was holding onto got7 for dear life knowing full well skz we’re going to convert me smh) and the best part? she never saw it coming. her official present was a cd with a bunch of kpop on it but she thought it was just a personalised mixtape for her so i told her to play the first song out loud and she knew the song Instantly. it has a long intro so she was like “i guess u did listen when i recommended u this song!! i knew you’d like it since u like rap so much!!” and then i started rapping and i shit u not. she started SCREAMING. like the initial reaction was her jaw dropping and then instinctively covering her mouth but when i kept going and she realised i wasn’t fucking around she just fucking screamed like a banshee. at the end during the sorry bit i threw off my jacket to reveal a got7 shirt on the inside and she fell off her chair and started rolling around on the floor. needless to say it was every bit as satisfying as i thought it’d be LMAOOOO afterwards her ass was like “I CANT BELIEVE U HID THIS FROM ME FOR OVER A YEAR” and when i tried to explain my ego couldn’t take the “i told u so” she was like “you know i wouldn’t have made fun of you for it right? i would just be glad you’re not hating on my boys anymore” so basically i’m a big dramatic fool and she was always too good for me.

don’t mind the weird spaces here my ipad is being all fucky wucky w me rn. damn sad to hear ur sideblog experience didn’t go so well, i’d have shown u the cool side of the fandom if i knew 😤😤 leading u thru the cursed halls of kpop stan tumblr like a sketchy tour guide that’s actually 3 small raccoons stacked on top of each other like a trench coat, like “over here we have the fanfic writers that honestly need to publish a book, over here we have the gif makers that are responsible for my entire camera roll, if we take a quick swerve past the death threat anons and the twt fanwar screenshots - mind ur feet bub the 14 year olds were tryna make a grab for ur ankles - ah here’s the holy grail of shitposts, you might be here for hours, to the right we have the weird aussie side of the fandom that projects our childhoods onto chanlix but also all the members as we decide what their life in australia would’ve been like, and down there is a secret trapdoor to the blogs w endless random headcanons that will make you laugh, cry or blush depending on if the author woke up and decided to choose violence today. enjoy your Stay!” but then again i’m not so active on tumblr anymore (ngl you’ve become the highlight of my tumblr experience these days, interaction wise,) so maybe all my Local Hotspots are inactive now. i know a bunch of them are, it’s sad. “i don’t fw stan twitter for the same reason i don’t hang out in meth dens” oop. guess i’m a meth addict. no but i get u i rly do, it’s a hellhole out there, but the fact that things get shared and spread a lot easier than on tumblr and how short most things have to be (therefor keeping up w my adhd attention span without having to resort to the mental torture that is tiktok, with the added bonus of not always needing headphones.) that i just. couldn’t leave if i tried. maybe i should try being active on tumblr again but it’s a dying site in comparison.

“their music doesn’t consistently hit for me as much as skz” i’m sorry we can’t be friends anymore. what. what. you don’t dramama ramama ramama hey? you don’t feel a little jealousyyyyyy, naega anin? you don’t shoot out, shoot out, shoot out, or aremdaeun love killa love killa? you can’t be your hero du du du du du du du du du dududu? u disappoint me. literally like everyone i know who likes skz music likes mx music like it’s a rite of Passage. they’re kindred spirits, monsta x music is like skz’s music’s cool but mildly heterosexual older brother. neither of them know what a bad song is it runs in the family. and both their music runs in my VEINS. whenever i describe my music taste they’re always the first two that come to mind, skz being my number 1 bc they are my best boys but mx bc of the Flavour. pls listen to the entire the code album then get back to me 😤🙌 ok but fr ur so right they are 7 of the finest men i ever seen (yes i say 7 bc i’m including wonho cause he deserved better and i’ll die on my ot7 bullshit.) like don’t get me started on them either LOL i LITERALLY downloaded that one insta video of changkyun working out his back n arm muscles w his tattoo showing bc i needed that shit saved for Science. they could do Anything w me like frfr. yes vixx is the bdsm contract group i’m telling ya they wildin. or at least they were. it’s been years since their last comeback idk what they’re doing anymore tbh. and yeah that makes sense, savouring the hyperfixation i feel it, but also i’m so attached to skz that i never let it die. like i hyperfixate on other things and other groups but i will Always go back to skz cause they’re my homeboys. hell, they’re my home. being a predebut stay i’ve spent more time w skz than most of my actual family members at this point. but that’s just me you do u boo xx just know that if ur anything like me ur never letting go once skz it’s been my longest lasting fixation cause they hit like Nothing Else Do. ik i’ve already said that but i cannot stress it enough. they’re really special. i’m gonna stop here before i get all sappy and emotional bc i really love those boys so fucking much and i don’t drop the L bomb often. SIDE NOTE I WOULD LIKE TO SEE UR LIST OF GROUPS RANKED BY THORSt. i need to judge ur Taste. and omg cat&dog is such a guilty pleasure song bc the lyrics make me cringe so much bc while pet play can be fun they be doing it in more of an “i’m an innocent soft dogboy uwu” kinda way that just Does Not Sit Right with me. it comes back to the objectifying of asians that asians themselves don’t help in industries like these and maybe i’m looking too far into it when rly it is just wholesome n cute or maybe they are into some pet play shit idk idc i will bop to the song regardless but i will not acknowledge the lyrics nope.

YOURE RIGHT THO SKZ’S OPENNESS IS IN FACT, A BIG DEAL, i’ll grab them for u if u want but i found these twt threads of skz supporting the lgbt community and i just felt a special kind of happiness man like sure the delusional part of me likes going “haha they’re gay” bc my brain likes to imagine them as my polycule of mlm boyfriends bc sometimes thats what gives me the serotonin to get me thru the day ok don’t judge but also bc it’s nice knowing that yes i’ll never know them personally, but at least i can support them knowing they’d respect my gender identity and my pronouns, they’d respect who i choose to love, and that’s already more than the general public can say so shit, it is special! it’s special that they don’t treat being cishet like the norm - they constantly remove gender from their songs and speech entirely, they don’t assume all stays are female anymore, we don’t talk abt the babygirls incident cause we got babystays in the end outta that ok, and it’s just. so refreshing and important to me bc i can’t get that anywhere else!! like my semi ults are the boyz and while i love them very much and there’s no way all 11 of them are straight i refuse, i do get just a little bit sad whenever they she/her their fandom by default and call them their girlfriends n shit even tho i do still identify as a girl, i’m also genderfluid/nonbinary/transmasc, and i have a very love/hate relationship w my womanhood and rarely use she/her pronouns, cause it’s like, do you not see me? see us? the ones who aren’t cishet women? i mean i know kevin does bc he congratulated a fan who came out as nb but it’s just not the same as the openness we get w skz. like how do i trust cishets i could be supporting them as a queer person when in reality they’d call me a slur. what would i know, behind the screen? so it’s so good that skz go the extra mile to make it a safe space for everyone. this is already long enough i will reply to the second half of that ask in another message… tomorrow cause it’s 1am and i’m tired gn -felix bi anon

I'mma have to start putting these under a readmore so that i don't absolutely make everything who is still following me for some reason go totally fucking insane 😂

NDJDHWJJAHFNAKBSJSBFBHHDBDNAJD YOU HAVE NO IDEA THE FACES I WAS MAKING READING THIS, I WAS FUCKING CACKLING AND GASPING EVERY OTHER SENTENCE SO HARD THAT I SCARED THE CATS NDJWHSHSB the fact that you went "oh you want me to get into kpop? Give me a hot minute, and I'll give you a whole ass private concert for free" biduehsjdbd biiiiiiiiiiitch you're a fucking ICON, I stg I could NEVER 😂 (and not just because I couldn't find a tune if you gave me a printed set of Google maps directions and that I embody the steriotype that white people can't dance, like my sister kept sensing me tiktoks of the whole "dance like a white girl" trend going lmfao look it's you and eventually I was like "sis please this trend has me feeling like being white is a disability and these mothafuckers are being ableist 😭 also I could NEVER be that on beat so yall ain't even doin it right 😭😭😭😭"). Tbh if I told one of my friends (lol what friends, i got jokes) to get into Skz and they showed up at my bday and performed the entirety of I Got It I would simply shower them in money and go "aight everyone else go home, you are no longer needed, you are being laid off, your position has been eliminated, we're downsizing, the company is moving up and you're moving out, you are not qualified for this role any longer, best of luck with future endeavors" 😊

I think part of the reason I can't deal w Twitter is the exact reason I refuse to leave tumblr, in that I've been on tumblr since 2006 and twt since 2008, and tumblr literally has not changed at all, not even a little, whereas going from the early days of twt where there were no corporate sponsorships or ads and you had to manually copy and paste someone's tweet and @ them to retweet it, to how it is now, like 90% ads and showing me shit from the timelines of people I don't even fuckin follow n whatnot, it's just not enjoyable. Idk how anyone finds anything on twt, it confuses and frustrates me because I am old and have not adapted well to technology changing 😂 But arguably, the skz fanbase doesn't want me on skztwt anyways so like it works for both of us lmfaooo. I am old and cringey, and also still think of twt as stream of consciousness whereas tumblr is your teenage bedroom where you can decorate the walls with anything that interests you. I do really love the nonsensical kpoptwt shitposts tho fhshsbdjjss like it is a very specific flavor of mental instability that I enjoy immensely 😂 OH and also I initially misread part of that and thought you were saying you actually irl do meth and I was like 😳 WHAT DO I SAY TO THAT. HOW DO I HANDLE THIS. Like how do I express like "I wasn't being judgy of people who use substances cause I've been there but I was just being insensitive 😳" And then went back and reread it and was like WHEW, IM JUST AN ILLITERATE FOOL 😂😂😂😂 ejeywhdhrhjwbfbdjshdhdhd I spent like an hour bwign like "IS THE REASON WE GET ALONG BECAUSE THEY'RE ON METH???? WHAT DO I DO WITH THIS INFORMATION??????" hrhehshe I am literally a fuckin idiot it's fine

It's not that I don't fw them, it's more like... Okay so like there is no situation in which I am going to skip a skz song if it comes on shuffle. You will not ever catch me NOT in the mood to listen to Sunshine, if God's Menu comes on we are THROWIN the meager amount of booty meat I got hither and thither, I could be in the happiest mood of my life but if Ex comes on I will stop to SOB. And I'm not like that with most music, so mx just falls into the category of "there is a time and place." Idk why but it just doesn't forcibly grab hold of my heart and ass the way skz always does. I really don't WANT my skz fixation to ever end, but I know that eventually it'll stop giving me dopamine bevause my brain is my worst fucking enemy 🙃 like my arcana fixation is to date the longest running hyperfixation I've ever had, going on almost three years, and I used to not be able to spend every single second of every day thinking about Asra, but now... I just feel nothing when I look at arcana stuff. As you can probz tell by the fact that I hardly post arcana anymore 😂 So I know that eventually all my happiness will end, it always does, I can never stay just as obsessed with something as I was for long. I CANT SHARE THE LIST BECAUSE I DONT *HAVE* TASTE YET 😭 I'm basically just compiling a list of any group someone tells me I should look into, ranked by how strong the kitty purred upon googling pics of them 😂 My mom read my ass to FILTH over txt lmfao she was like "they're not that adorable. Maybe your standard for adorableness has gone down with You Know Who still on hiatus 🤔" bfjwhdhd like MOMMAAAAA THE LIBRARY IS CLOSED 😂 she attacks me any time I even hint at stanning other groups, she is a skz purist and stans skz only, unofficial Momma Stay of All Stays keeping me in check lmfao.

I feel like skz really do follow thru on their promise that they're a safe space for stays, it's nice to see that they hold space for anyone and everyone in their fanbase and do it in a really simple and elegant way, I feel. Like they never make it seem like "okay here are the fans and here are the token weirdos that were only recognizing to make a buck off of them" the way a lot of artists make it feel like 😑 like they don't go out of their way to act like it's some revolutionary act to do the bare minimum of not shitting on certain parts of the fandom, if that makes sense. They feel very "yeah, of course we love all our stays, this is a welcoming space for literally anyone, that's how it should be, that should be normal," instead of like "Hi fans we love you 😊 and special shoutout to you ell gee bee tee folk, make sure to buy my rainbow merch after the show!!!" you know? Like, they're the friends who would never make you feel weird or different for some shit, the friends that take the attention off you if something they know ur sensitive about comes up, instead of weirdly snapping at whoever brought the unfomfy thing up which ruins the mood and makes you feel tiwce as bad, yk? They just give off this vibe that they, and the space they create with their music, is just a genuine and chill place to be and hang out and relax and bond. I feel like they'd be the friend group that is so goofy and sweet and silly and accepting and lovely and always makes you feel loved and excited to be alive 🥺 They are all good noodles 🥺🥺🥺

[philcollinsenjoyer]

after listening to the hedwig and the angry inch riverdale version album for two weeks straight heres the ranking of the songs from worst to best

- wicked little town: sorry to the wickedheads i guess but this doesnt do much for me. somehow they all sound bad singing the beginning, even lili which is crazy

- random number generation: i like it! kinda boring so its not higher but i think the little choreo is fun i like the shirts i like them taking confetti out of their lockers. HEY HERE WE ARE lalalalalalalalalala. im taking points away for giving sweet pea such a high number tho wdym 35

-midnight radio: of course theres the iconic heres to ronnie and archie and betty and jughead but beyond that i think they sound very nice singing the chorus theres a v sweet scene with fangs reggie and sweet pea in the bar love it! tho why was kevin singing that i dont remember him being in the archies

- tear me down: i dont really like this song to be perfectly honest i feel casey cott was flexing his broadway training on us too much but i have to place it high for the second archie gay kiss. millions raised for the lgbt community

- sugar daddy: i know people were mad as hell for this one which makes me love it. i <3 my cringe queen cheryl<3333 the scene is very interesting from a narrative/meta perspective and the song is fr very good. also has mr honey saying hes gay + how queerphobic of you! this did a lot for us

- exquisite corpse: absolutely iconic "I GUESS DEATH JUST CHANGES A PERSON" and then just bursting into song riverdale at its finest ugh. mr sprouse is definitely the low point of this song but i love that archie and jughead are on the same side with betty and veronica opposite them a win for gay rights. their voices dont mix as well as in the origin of love but ill let it slide bc core four trans confirmed

- wig in a box: oh hell yeah baby you know casey cott was flexing his broadway training on us HARD but i dont mind it this time bc this scene is so good<3333 suddenly im miss midwest midnight checkout queen<33 not much to say on it its a very good song

- THEE origin of love: theres not a single thing about this song that i dont like i dont know how to convey to you how much i like it. everything about it is perfect i dont even want to listen to the original version bc i know they CLEARED those bitches like this is lili reinharts world we're just living in it. the fact that its the set up for a barchie kiss doesnt even dampen my enthusiasm its that good<3 most romantic song on earth i think we should make it the national anthem and im 100% serious.

[selfcareparker]

LMAOO I WAS GONNA BRING UP FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLIDER BUT I WASNT SURE IF YOU WERE WATCHING IT HSKAJ (are you liking it? i know it’s only the first episode but ya know, another one tomorrow night- well tomorrow night for me, and did you like wandavision?? i loved it!!)

oh my goodness i’m watching lion king while writing this and i haven’t seen it in a while and i am..... emotional. but anyway, i love that streaming services think that imma pay for them while they charge $50 a month. like yes of course i have that kind of money and i am going to give it to you to watch tv 🙄 that $50 is budgeted to sims thank you. (ALSO SIMS!!! i’ll get to that in a minute) now see if i don’t google levidia right this minute LMAOO, not that i’m gonna use it.. just for the research...

AND HDKSHS SEND THAT CHAOS WALKING LINK LMAO i saw it for the third time with a different one of my friends and she wasn’t the best one to see it with? she literally was on her fucking phone and i was like ok whatever her loss not mine, and idk if you’ve read the books or if you’ve seen it by now, but by the end of the whole movie, after they’ve confirmed THE THING throughout the whole movie she asked the dumbest question and i’m like diD YOU NOT WATCH THE MOVIE, and i guess she didn’t. so. this sounds so vague but i don’t wanna spoil the movie for you just in case lol.

THE STORY LMAOO, so A DIFFERENT FRIEND LOL, like my oldest bff, we had a day together and we wanted to go see chaos walking. and i honest to God thought that no one would be seeing this movie. like NO ONE. every day, i checked the theater seating and no one was there right? plus i really wanted us to have the theater to ourselves. so we sit in the wrong seats, the row in front of us, STILL THINKING WE’RE ALONE. and then these 3 older people came in AND IM ABOUT TO SCREAM FHSJSH AND IM LIKE “are we in your seats?” and they we were like uh yeah, AND IT WAS SO BAD LMAOO , we’re moving and everything would’ve been FINE but my friend’s reclined seat was going down so slow and as it’s going shes LITERALLY SAYING ALOUD “awkward awkward awkward” so she thinks forget it, lemme just get up. HER BAG GETS CAUGHT ON HER CHAIR AND HER FRIES AND THEY SPILL ALONG WITH HER HONEY MUSTARD 😭😭 ALL OVER THE FLOOR! so i’m trying not to laugh lmao but those aren’t even our seats and we just made a mess, so naturally, i get on the floor and start cleaning it up with my napkins (this is going for too long) AND MY FRIEND IS STILL SAYING “awkward awkward awkward awkward” and i’m really abt to crack up bECAUSE LIKE SHUT UP HAHAHA and we’re cleaning it and shit and the oldest lady is gonna say “yeah you’re not gonna make an old lady get on the floor, are you?” AND I WANTED TO LAUGH AND SCREAM AT THE SAME TIME BC DID WE ASK YOU TO, NO, so then i had to get the manager and she helped us clean it, we got new fries and everything was fine, it’s just a crazy story bc LITERALLY WE COULDVE AVOIDED IT AND EVERYTHING BUT THESE ELDERLY PEOPLE HAD TO COME AND SEE THIS MOVIE😭😭 at least the gentlemen was nice.. he helped us clean. but then his wife was like “i aM nOt siTTiNg tHeRe” and at first i thought she was a teenager bc of her stink attitude but her husband was nice. and it’s not like we weren’t cleaning it up, we were!!! like i was so apologetic- anyway.

about sims! do you play console or pc? wait,, you already told me you play pc bc your computer was broken, i’m glad you can play now though :’)) litetally when i read in the tags that you’re playing sims !!!! and are you hyped for bunk beds? i have cc so i’ve had them for a bit, but they were glitchy... but i’m so excited we have them now! i should really play sims today...

GURL IM SO PROUD OF YOU 🥺🥲 i know you aren’t fluent in everything and you aren’t a linguistic genius LMAO but it’s still soooo amazing :’) here i am reading the captions while ur just going hahah, yea i tried duolingo but.... i didn’t stick to it HDJSH talking to you though makes me so interested because you know all these languages, not even studying them like that, but you have this foundation and ahh it’s just super cool. LOL YOU DONT SOUND LAME HAJA IM TELLING YOU ITS SO SO COOL, i’m loving this lesson btw oh my goodness- HSKAJS YOU THOUGHT I WOULD ALREADY KNOW THAT??? HDYSJHS MY ONLY ENGLISH SPEAKING ASS??? HAHAHAHHAH i find that word (Rindfleischetikettie- i’m not gonna write the whole thing i’m sorry) very interesting... like... wow. did you have to google that or did you just know lmao

OKAH THE WATER THING HDKDJDKS UR GONNA TERRIFY ME HAHAH OH MY LORD- first of all CROATIA 😍😍 but thinking about it like that, I WOULD FREAK OUT TOO HAHSGSG i never go that deep into the water, or if i do i have my dad with me lol and i kind of hold onto him bc ive seen/heard too many things about people being dragged into the sea. but i loveee the water (i wanted to be a mermaid soooo bad ohmigosh)

I DONT UNDERSTAND HOW ONE CANNOT LIKE MUSIC ITS AWFUL !! lmao yeah i haven’t even listened to harry’s his first album, everyone says they love it more. I WAS GONNA SAY IMMA LISTEN TO ONLY ANGEL BUT THE WAY YOU DESCRIBE IT HUHAHAH also i have never listened to anything by mgk (i actually had to google who he was IM SORRY😔) i’m tempted to listen tho lol PLEASE JUSTIN BIEBER- I PROMISE IM NOT LAUGHING AT U IVE JUSY NEVER HAD SOMEONE SAY THAT B4!! like i don’t know many people who’ve liked him bUT NOW IM GONNA LISTEN & the cardboard cutout- okay. 😭😭😭

oh my goodness to see the vamps live 🤧 TO SEE ANYONE LIVE PLEASE JJDGSHAHGD and little mix is so good oh my goodness- i actually haven’t been to that many concerts.. i was at my first one, elsie fest (it’s like a broadway thing really) in uhhh october of 2019, yea i took my mom for her birthday bc she loves darren criss and i’m obsessed with glee lmao OH MY GOODNESS YOUVE BEEN TO SO MANY!!! and those are such great artists 😩😩

LMAO UR FINE, hamilton is a musical that lin manuel miranda wrote and i think generally made? i’m obsessed, but basically it was on broadway and then recorded and put on disney+ ... idk i guess it counts a film bc it’s like a movie really cuz it was recorded but in what 2018 or 2016? i don’t remembers the date that is on disney+ but it’s strange how i got into it, a lot of my friends were obsessed and i was like uhh why? and while researching it and watching it, trying to figure out why people love it... i fell in love with it LMAO but the music is FANTASTIC and lin is incredible😭 but yes yes yes i loveeeee high school musical!! my dad actually took my cousins to see it on ice or something (i absolutely forget lmao) but i don’t know how people don’t know hsm. it upsets me.

OKAY IM DOWN TO THE BOTTOM HAHAHA (it takes me so long to respond, now i’m on lion king 2 WHICH IS SO GOOD PLEASE FHHSSHHSHSH) i could respond in chunks but i kind of enjoy responding like this? it feels a bit like a letter but if this whole thing is overwhelming i’ll cut it up lol

+ yes that was me about your fic and sleep and everything lol but it was so good😭 i don’t understand how you write peter so well like you have this ability to capture his.. everything? i’m crine. all the time. over your fics. & i cannot describe my happiness for youuuu :’) i’m so happy you’re writing again 🥺🥰 the thing about how you only want to write the long peter fic but you don’t know how to continue... i feel that so so so hard, i don’t think i told you but ughh i was so blah bc of that feeling of having pent up inspiration for only one fucking thing and not being able to write it. it’s so frustrating 😭

not to add more to this but i need to vent a bit? the situation is definitely different bc with your major it obviously requires for you to ya know, know english lol, but uhm bc i’m homeschooled ive been cheating on all my work SHSHDHSJ like i google the answers but i’m still learning! it’s just..... i find it so unnecessary, like going for an audition no one is gonna say to me “i want you to chanel the knowledge within yourself of the centripetal force of the circle that is the table on this stage” like tf??? there’s literally no point. i’m gonna be getting into voice lessons again soon and i’m already doing dance, AND i’ll be doing this summer camp program (more hamilton lol) and thinking about school is only making me stress more, like i haven’t been able to rehearse dance at all this week bc of it...... so

hahaha reading your tags, lonely anon would still be accurate HAHAHHAHA // another add: yea i love ur current theme, i’ve gotten used to “seeing you” like this, but anything will look super pretty :)) ALSO HOW IS IT STILL SNOWING THERE, i swear it’s getting warmer and warmer by the day here 😭🤧

these long ass posts, my gosh🥲 lonely lovely anon <3

Omg yes it does feel like a letter sldkdj and then the few days of waiting also make more sense okay i love this ❣️💕❤️💓❤️💞🧡💜💘(wtf)sksjhz

Dear lovely anon,

ALSKSJVKD yes i‘m liking falcon and winter soldier dlkdh i haven‘t watched the second episode yet but i‘ll watch it tomorrow! but i didn‘t watch wandavision........ eidislskks i was going to but idk i wasn‘t that interested in it and watching series is already too much of a commitment (what can i say i‘m a Sagittarius—🤧 (no i’m joking i actually know NOTHING about starsigns)) didjj that i couldn‘t force myself to watch it, ALSO i hate (idk if this is an unpopular opinion) when every episode is like a whole hour. i‘m rewatching an old series today (it‘s german so i won‘t even get into it) and the episodes are 25 mins each and i‘ve already watched 8 episodes today ridlndjdjd,,, and i feel like if the episodes were an hour each i wouldn‘t have gotten past episode 2 today like idk.... even if series had the same length in total, i prefer when the individual episodes are shorter idk why tho tbh (so yeah i already wasn‘t 100% convinced about watching wandavision so i just couldn’t make myself watch a bunch of 1hour episodes— i‘ve heard that it‘s good tho- but i‘m not much of a series person so. Dldkk (have we talked about this already??? sorry i don‘t remember what i said lol and i couldn‘t find my own post anymore so dkdjsh) (WAIT I JUST CHECKED THE WANDAVISION EPIOSRDES ARENT EVEN THAT LONG??? Okay wait i might watch it now - did you like it? let me know if i should watch it— why did i think they were 60minutes???)

okay another confession i‘ve never watched the lion king????? i mean i watched it when i was a child but i was too young to actually pay attention to any kind of plot i just liked the songs lol sldkdj i‘ve been meaning to watch it for years tho 🦁 (idk it just felt appropriate to put a lion emoji lmoaoo)

OH MY GOD THE CHAIS WALKING/CINEMA STORY AHSJSKKS😭😭😭😭 NOOOOO (very fitting that there was so much chaos when you were watching a film that has chaos in the title loool) and the “awkward awkward awkward“ SAME SKSKSLSKDJ, that‘s literally me 24/7 ahajshshhshshsh. Like i was so skdjdjdkdllsldksnsnsnsb while i read what you sent me djslslsjdjdbdn why are old ladies always so grumpy btw 🥲🥲🥲 at least the man was nice tho! and wait did i read that right... you have fries (which, to me, are called chips dusuusldk) at your cinemas?? (Movie theatres sorry sksjsh) we just have popcorn and nachos and drinks i want chips too when i‘m watching a film what😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺

Also i still haven’t watched it so thanks for not spoiling it!!! (idk when i’ll watch it i’m so bad with films and even worse with series💀💀💀- same with cherry. i literally forgot all about cherry, i was SO hyped when the trailer came out like i’ve never been so excited about a movie... and then it came out... and i still haven‘t watch it like what‘s wrong with me???? Dkdjdjdjdklsl i feel like i‘m not gonna watch it anytime soon tbh, but i wanna watch chaos walking i just have to find the time

Okay and @ your other friend who wasn‘t paying attention like why are you even watching the film then???? but ok (omg this sounds so mean i‘m sure she‘s very nice but in this situation just like❔❔❔)

SIMS ahhh, BUNK BEDS, ahhhh sdljdjdjdkdkdldksj i actually haven‘t played it since the update 🤧🤧 i made both of my sims (enisa (bestselling author already, thank you) and michael (aspiring doctor)) go to university and bro it takes so long 😭😭 and you can‘t do anything else if you want them to do well so literally the last three times i played sims i was just constantly clicking their homework and computerd to write their assignments (i play it in german so idk what its called on the sims) and do their presentations and do them all over again so that they get better or whatever for HOURS, but imma play again soon

also i‘m living my fanfiction life loool, so i made my two sims neighbours (on the same plot tho but i made two small separate houses lol, i still wanted to control both of them at the same time but i made sure they didn‘t interact before i wanted them to skdjdjdk). and first they both experimented and got some experience in the love department you know (all genders, cause i have to live my sexuality even in a pc game slskdjh— wait, i‘ve never lived my sexuality irl like i‘ve done NOTHING nothing with guys nothing with girls (🥲) but maybe that’s why i want to do it even more in the sims) and then they met at uni and realised like hey we‘re neighbours and now they‘re together (but michael accidentally had an alien baby with another woman (who was an alien which i was not aware of) cause i wasn‘t paying attention like i said woohoo not try for baby like michael why is your pull out game so weak tf LSHDDHDJDJSKKDKSKDKS okay but making out and flirting and doing all the fun stuff in the sims turns me on way more than it should PFAHAHHAHSH) so idk why i told you this but I’m creating that neighbour!au in the sims lmaoooo

i did not have to google Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsübertragungsaufgabengesetz (just did it again😌 sisjshhs) but i might have mixed up the words überwachung und übertragung or i might have even forgotten a word skskks but in the end it doesn‘t matter (by linkin park- ok i‘m so sorry it‘s 2 am and i have a headache from having waveformers in my hair all day but i still wanted to reply to this now so sorry if i‘m not making any sense right nowbahahshah)

i wanted to be a mermaid too dldjdksksj like h2O and all those series convinced me i could be one like. i remember i‘d always go in the deep pool and attempt to swim like them in all the series with that wave motion i must have looked so crazy with my goggles as well dkdjsksöksj (i was like twelve but still)

so mgk has two sides one is hip hop/rap which is like ~~~~ idk he has good and bad songs, but his latest album is like punk pop snd I LOVE IT SO SO SO SO SO MUCH, so if you like punk pop I’d recommend his album tickets to my downfall (i don‘t blame yoj if you don‘t like it tho like about a year ago i would have HATED that type of music dkdkdkkd)🥴

Okay talking about music, there‘s this german rapper and he is... not a good person. he‘s literally a criminal and extremely sexist but to me he‘s still hot???????? he‘s even cute at times even tho he has tattoos everywhere and is like 6‘5 and is super aggressive but i see him and i‘m like 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 my heart beats only for you💘💘💘💘and he released a new song today and i watched the video and i‘m wondering wtf is wrong with me 😃 (he did look particularly cute cause he was high so idk he wasn’t really aggressive in this one) 😭 so i thought i‘d share that LMAO IDK

(not saying tattoos aren‘t cute btw i LOVE tattoos imma get some soon, but you know he looks like someone your grandma would be afraid of (and in his case rightfully so💀)

okay wait i‘m getting so tired it‘s 2 am i think i‘ll have to do the rest tomorrow but i wanted to do it now😭🥺🥺 see you tomorrow

it is now 3:42 am and i couldn‘t sleep so here we go again

girl you can laugh at me for liking justin tho skskks i wanna laugh at myself idk, like i said i really really really liked him a few years go, basically my life was at least 50% justin and then he went on a break for a while and released an album last year which i hated 🥴 but this album is wow. (Still weird to me because it‘s literally the definition of pop and i don‘t ever listen to pop?) and it‘s so weird because i used to know so much about justin and had so many friends who loved him as well and now it‘s like I’m listening to someone new? Don‘t get me wrong i never KNEW justin and i never will and i‘m aware of that shahsh but yeah i used to be soooo used to him and it‘s like reconnecting with an old friend and you realise you don‘t know that friend anymore- like you don‘t know them anymore at all. I mean justin is weird nowadays 😂😂😂 so pls laugh at me tbh dskksjsjsh

awww it‘s so wholesome that you gave your mom tickets to the concert 🥺🥺🥺🥺 i gave my mum tickets for pink like 2 years ago and she loved it so much and i was like 🥰🥰🥰 (i went with her) AND OMG GLEE ok so unfortunately i barely remember glee, but i used to watch it too!!!! And it‘s actually on my list of series i wanna watch (again) so youre making me want to watch it even more (but like i said i‘m bad with series so 😩😩😩 who knows when i‘ll rewatch it)

When all this pandemic shit is over (let‘s be hopeful <3333) then you need to go to as many concerts as possible!!!!! i‘ve been to SO MANY and it‘s literally one of the things in my life i‘m the most grateful for, concerts are some of the best experiences i‘ve ever had in my life especially the ones that are in smaller concert halls where you can feeeel the vibe and everyone‘s energy (and that sounds awful thinking about it mid-pandemic 😐) anyway—

Okay omg you‘re absolutely making me want to watch hamilton right now like omg i WANT TO WATCH IT NOW but it‘s 4 am sodndkdldl

what you said about my peter fics🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺like omg i love these emojis they literally just describe how i felt when reading what you said so, yes, 🥰🥺 + thank you :) it really means a lot <3

and no omg i totally get the studying thing. like last year before i graduated .. was that last year? yes wtf omg okaykdjdj, so the last three months before i had my final exams we were just in a lockdown and we didn‘t even have online classes. We had nothing except one teacher who left our group chat (😭) because she was mad at us (?) and one maths teacher who did an online ““lesson““ once a week. he‘d ask: so does anyone have questions. us: . Him: okay, bye then. So. Yeah dndldldj. But we had one online test and it was in german and like i read the book wee were supposed to read? but the questions on the test were all unanswerable (is that a word?) and i had to google everything (got an A tho 🤪 but only because i googled everything so i was so scared that i wouldn‘t be able to get a good result on the final exam because what if i‘d gotten used to just googling everything and i couldn‘t do it by myself anymore? anyway it was all fine in the end but yeah at times i couldn‘t even study because i had so much anxiety about studying and yeah- like this whole annoying cycle. but you said you‘re still studying———- okay wait 👁👄👁 i forgot what i was going to say??????????????????????????????????????????????????? Like wtf. Is wrong with me? And i‘m reading what you wrote again and i just don‘t know what i was going to say? Like i get what you‘re saying obviously but i‘m like? Idk 4am brain ayeee, please vent more if you need to and elaborate further because right now i‘m???? Too dumb to respond to this right now wtf. I‘m so sorry lmao ddlkdjdjd what is even going on like i‘m sitting here open mouthed just like ? But btw the fact that you have Voice and dance lessons is like SO FUCKING COOL like oh my god that is sosososos cool wtf, i was thinking that when you first talked about it too

And “i want you to chanel the knowledge within yourself of the centripetal force of the circle that is the table on this stage” ODHDKSLDBDJDOFIDKDNDLDK

Yes i know about the weather dkdkdkjd but it‘s getting (a lot) warmer here too and where i live we kind of get a weird type of wind called föhn (which literally means hair dryer but idk if that‘d the reason why it‘s called that, i‘m too tired to think of whether it makes sense rn) and it gives me headachesssssss and the changing weather is also giving me headaches 😭😭😭😭 so this season right now is just headache season and i hate summer so i wish it would just snow again lmao (okay it‘s getting so late that it‘s early already snd i can hear this bird chirping so fucking loud wtf i‘m also getting a headache 🤧🤧🤧) but at least i can do my new theme soon (i hope it‘ll look good🥺 and omg thank you for what you said about my current theme- i always feel like i‘m so bad with aesthetics, i obviously like my theme but i feel like every single person on tumblr has a theme that is prettier than mine so it was very nice to hear you say that you love it👉🏼👈🏼 (i‘m so used to it by now that i actually hate it lmao so it‘s getting yeeted soon and i‘m making megan thee stallion my pfp 🤪 (if the graphics and shit works out skdjdjdj)

[f4y3w00d5]

Faye Fangirls About My Chemical Romance, Part 1 (Danger Days

Danger Days: True Lives Of the Fabulous Killjoys – Sorta pop punk ig, some more rocky songs

Excluding the ‘songs’ where its just talking

Okay so basically  this is their most recent album, 2014, and it follows the Killjoys as they fight against BL.IND (Better Living Industries) who seek to ELIMINATE all  individuality. (Spoiler: They die saving The Girl in the music video for SING)

Na Na Na (Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na)

Upbeat!!! Dancing!!! Fast!!! You jump around screaming about doing crime and partying and sex!!! I love it!!! (you should listen to it after Look Alive Sunshine, which is the intro to the album and its just Dr D speaking, and at the start of Na Na Na, it goes ‘THE FUTURE IS BULLETPROOF! THE AFTERMATH IS SECONDARY!! TIME TO DO IT NOW AND DO IT LOUD! KILLJOYS, MAKE SOME NOISE!!!’)

Bulletproof Heart

Uh so this is sorta less fast and stuff but its SO cool and idk how to describe it but its sorta jaunty? First song I listened to by the band!!! (Fav part is ‘and tho, I know, how much you hate this. Are you gonna be the one to save us? From. The black. And hope-less feelin. Will you meet ‘em when the end comes reelin? Hold, your heart, into this darkness. Will it ever be the light to shine you out? Or fail. And leave you stranded? I aint gonna be the one left standin. You aint gonna be the one left standin, and we aint gonna be the ones left standin!!!’)

SING

Aaaaaaaaa this ones so cool, took a bit to grow on me, its mostly slow and repetitive but the BRIDGE ‘Cleaned up corporations PROGRESS! Dyin in the PROCESS! Children that can TALK ABOUT IT livin on the WEB-WAYS, people movin SIDEWAYS, sell it til your LAST DAYS, buy yourself the motivation GENERATION NOTHIN! Nothing but a DEAD SCENE! Product of a WHITE DREAM! I am not the SINGER THAT YOU WANTED BUT A DANCER! I REFUSE TO ANSWER! TALK ABOUT THE PAST SIR! WROTE IT FOR THE ONES WHO WANNA GET AWAY! ……. Keep runnin.’

Planetary (GO!)

Okay so like omg. I love this one. Everythings amazin. Starts off slightly slow, and then starts movin faster around the verses? AND THE VIBES!!! Ive got a few favs and ill save them here (I love the way theyre said too-) ‘Ladies and gentleman, truth is now acceptable! Fame! Is now injectable, PROCESS THE PROGRESS, This core is critical, faith is un-a-vail-a-ble, Lives, become incredible-‘ and also ‘Youre unbelievable, ah, so unbelievable, ah, you ruin everything, oh, you better GO HOME! Im unbelievable yeah, im undefeatable yeah, LETS RUIN EVERYTHIN, BLAST IT TO THE BACK ROW- they sell presentable, young! And so ingestible! Sterile and collectable! SAFE, and I cant STAND THAT! This is a letter, by word, is the beretta, the sound, of my vendetta against, the ones that PLANNED IT!’ So uhhhhhhhhh yeah lol

The Only Hope For Me Is You

Likeeeeeeeee holy SHIT this one just sorta- idkkkk- ‘Where? Where were you when, all of the embers fell? I still remember them… covered in ash. Covered in glass. Covered in all my friends, I still… think of the bombs they built- IF THERES A PLACEEE THAT I COULD BE, THEN ID BE ANOTHERR MEMORY, CAN I BE THE ONLY HOPE FOR YOU? BECAUSE YOURE THE ONLY HOPE FOR ME! AND IF WE CAN FIND WHERE  WE BELONG, WE’ll Have To make It on our own!! Face all the painnn and takeee it on, because the only hope for me, is you alone…’ its one of the slower ones tho

Party Poison

This one starts in Japanese for some reason??? Its hard to explain… another fast and dancy type one ig, but sorta raw-er?  Its sooooooo weird- not one of my favs but its semi popular

Save Yourself, I’ll Hold Them Back

Okay so idk how to describe this really- sorta gives Only Hope type thing but faster and sorta rockier? Idk. My fav parts tho!!! ‘Get offfff the ledge, and drop the knife… Not a victim of a victims life! Because… this aint a room fullla suicides- WE’RE BELIEVERSS I BELIEVE TONIGHT-‘ OH AND ONE OF THE MORE POPULAR LINES PEOPLE KNOW ‘Ill tell you well how the story ends, where the good guys die and the bad guys win… (WHO CARES?)- THIS AINT ABOUT ALL THE FRIENDS YOU MADE, BUT THE GRAFFITII THEY WRITE ON YOUR GRAVE-‘ then the last two ‘Im the only friend that makes you cry! Youre a heart attack in black hair dye! So just save yourself, and Ill hold them back tonight….’ And ‘We can live forever if you’ve got the time- YOU MOTHERFUCKER (OHHHWHOAAAA) Youre the broken glass in the mornin light! Be a burnin’ star if it takes all night!’

S/C/A/R/E/C/R/O/W

OHOHOH APPARENTLY THIS ONE IS TO SOOTHE THE KIDS WHEN THE NUCLEAR BOMBS HIT AND GET THEM INTO THE SHELTER!!! (yes there are nuclear bombs, its post apocalyptic lmao) I love the bridge- ‘Love, love, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this bomb, bomb, love wont stop this… bomb……. Run, run, bunny, run. Run, run, bunny ruuuuuuuuuuun’ One of the slowest in the album also

Summertime

Okay so this is prolly my fav? Idk how to describe it tbh….. I know what it describes for me buuuut you don’t wanna hear me be weird about people……. Ill just tell you my fav parts (that I relate to!!!) ‘Terrified of what I’d be, as a kid from what Ive seen… Every single day when people try and put the pieces back together, just to smash them down… turn my headphones up real loud…. I don’t think I need them now…. Cos you stop the noise!!!’

DESTROYA

………………fucked up robot song where you scream and moan. What else is there to say? (the porn bots In the story worship a ‘god’ called Destroya who will supposedly come save them)

The Kids From Yesterday

I love this one too. Sorta slow ig. Nostalgic maybe? ‘Well now, this could be the last of all the rides we take…. So hold on tight and don’t look back……… we don’t care about the message or the rules they make…. Ill find you when the sun goes black…..’

Vampire Money

Dance!!! Sex!! Upbeat!!! Fast!!! ‘Three two one, we came to FUCK-‘ and my other fav line ‘and get your finger on the trigger tap the barrel of the gun! Hair back, motherfucker, jet black, SO COOL-‘

@mayhem-moth

[0000507]

Into the Spider-verse, but make it about the Umbrella Academy

Album challenge: Umbrella Academy Edition, i.e. I take a songlist and try and attribute each song to a character.

Song lyrics and (my personal, probably inaccurate) character analysis under the cut. Fair warning, long ass post is long.

So I’m starting this challenge with the Spider-Man: Into the Spider-verse album because I’ve been listening to it (a lot) lately.

01. What’s Up Danger by Blackway & Black Caviar is, to me, very much a Five song. Like, just check out these lyrics:

Ayy, gettin' old, they doubted us Makes it that more marvelous … Two-hundred miles-per-hour wit' a blindfold on (on) Mama always askin', "Where did I go wrong?" (wrong) What's up, danger? Ah, what's up, danger? Traveled two-hundred miles, I'm knockin' at your door And I don't really care if you ain't done wrong, come on What's up, danger? (Danger) D-don't be a stranger (stranger) I like it when trouble brews, I won't dare change I like it when there's turbulence on my airplanes I like it when I sense things I can't see yet Swimmin' with sharks when they ain't feed yet 'Cause I like high chances that I might lose I like it all on the edge just like you, ayy I like tall buildings so I can leap off of 'em I go hard wit' it no matter how dark it is If I'm crazy, I'm on my own If I'm waitin', it's on my throne If I sound lazy, just ignore my tone 'Cause I'm always gonna answer when you call my phone Like, what's up, danger? (Danger) Like, what's up, danger? Can't stop me now I said, "I got you now" I'm right here at your door I won't leave, I want more What's up, danger?

02. Next up we have Sunflower by Post Malone & Swae Lee which, to be honest, gives me such heavy Vanya vibes I can’t even. More so due to the song itself than the lyrics, but they’re still pretty accurate. That smooth af sound, tho.

Give me a reason to (to, to) Oh, every time I'm walkin' out (ayy) I can hear you tellin' me to turn around Fightin' for my trust and you won't back down Even if we gotta risk it all right now, oh (now) I know you're scared of the unknown (known) You don't wanna be alone (alone) I know I always come and go (and go) But it's out of my control And you'll be left in the dust Unless I stuck by ya

03. Next we have Way Up by Jaden Smith, which, despite being a boppin’ song, really didn’t remind me of anyone in particular until I really sat down and read the lyrics. So I’m going to attribute this one (tentatively) to all of the seven, though I’m leaning a little heavier towards Luther than the rest. 

I went from boy to a man, wow (man) Opposition had to stand down Man I had to make a perfect plan, now I'm on the wave (Wave, wave, wave) I had to fight for the city (for the city) I had to fight for the people (for the people) You gotta do what all leaders do (go) Everyone here, we believe in you (yeah) Know you can be a hero 'cause we seen you do it (woo) And this is the time that we needin' you (you) Everyone is here to see you move (move) Winnin', we winnin', we winnin' (we winnin') We put a world on a wave (wave) And every time you swinging through the city You are the saving the day (let's go) ... We had to fight for the town (town) Now there's no villains allowed ('lowed) Everyone cheer in the crowd But I'm still way up, I'm over the clouds (clouds) We had to fight for the city (city) Competition was lethal (lethal) Honestly it's no biggie (biggie) I had to do what all leaders do ... They always hate on us, but they can't do it without us Yeah-yeah, yeah-yeah, we out here cleanin' the streets (streets) We don't accept the defeat ('feat) We keep on going until we win (win) Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, all of 'em weak in the knees (knees) Deer in headlights when they freeze (freeze) But we keep on going until we win

04. Familia by Nicki Minaj & Anuel AA ft. Bantu is, without a single doubt, representative of all of the Hargreeves siblings. Full stop.

Father, father, unforgivable This is my house, you made it personal It's always trouble when they go too far Nobody mess with my familia Father, father, could you bless his soul? He talking crazy, I may lose control

05. The lyrics don’t necessarily fit in some places, but the general tone and feel of Invincible by Amine still makes it a Luther song in my book.

I wanna, I wanna fly right now I wanna see all my homies get down I wanna feel like I can't come down I got a dream so I can't stop now I gotta stop feeling invisible And start feeling invincible Hate feeling impossible The hardest thing is believing in your dreams Stop feeling invisible And start feeling invincible Hate feeling impossible The hardest thing is believing in your dreams I feel like a stranger to myself And sometimes that feels dangerous But I'll bet you'll see me For who I truly am, maybe not if it wasn't bland Some days I look in mirrors and I wonder who's that man

06. Start a Riot by DUCKWRTH & Shaboozey is Diego’s official anthem don’t @ me. The dude probably blasts this when he’s taking down bad guys. A bit of shade, a bit of bass, I can fully see Diego rocking to this song. 

When I say, "Brooklyn, stand up" (stand up) You better just fix your posture And every hero needs his theme song So, who in here tryna You ain't got a chance, boy What you think? (Huh?) I thrown in everything but the kitchen sink (yeah) I try to be friendly in the neighborhood (okay) I know all the little grannies wanna sip they tea (yeah) And here you come, all barging in (huh?) All ugly like a brown fur cardigan We receive the monologue and the arguing I'm like who in here tryna start a riot? … If you bump that action, it don't matter Just let me know, oh, know Make way (make way) I'm comin' through With my crew to make 'em pay I don't need no super suit I'm feelin' brave Don't be a hero Turn around and walk away … Every day is like a sticky situation When evil's looking for a chance (for a chance, ooh) And I know we are the newest generation (newest, newest) We got the power in our hands

07. Hide by Juice WRLD ft. Seezyn is, for me, all about Allison and how having and losing Claire changed her as a person. This is a more sorrowful song, but I still think it fits her. Slow, more laid back, but still heartfelt.

She made me leave the thrills at home And I'm fine with it She really made me lose control I'ma let my love unfold We're just two lost souls But we're fine with it There's love at my front door, short notice You're not like the same girls I notice Think I met my soul mate Yeah, I know it When it gets dark outside In you I confide You help me face my demons I won't hide, hide Girls like you are hard to find I hope you don't mind If I give you the time of your life … Life is not the same With your pictures in my frame Now that you're here I want nothing to change You pick me up when I'm down I need you around You seen me through my darkest times Girl, is there something that you try to find? You brought meaning to my life All because of you, I do right Because of you, I have a purpose Fight for the world, because you're worth it

08. Oof, this next song. Despite having a nice little lo-fi beat and a lighter sound going on, in the context of his experiences I really do think that Memories by Thutmose personifies Ben (both the Umbrella and Sparrow versions) and, to an extension, Klaus (seeing as dead!Ben can only interact with the world through him). 

My memories came back In the form of someone else … Memories It's gon' take some getting used to Memories Feel the pain when it hits you Memories Don't you ever let them fool you Don't you ever let them fool you 'Cause I know that you know that it ain't true I learned the hard way about trust About us, about us You sin and be on your high horse We're not so stable anymore What's left if I give you my all?

09. Save The Day by Ski Mask The Slump God & Jacquees ft. Coi Leray & lougotcash was a tough one, because the sound really didn’t fit in with anyone and I wasn’t really feeling it in regards to the group at large, but then I started digging into the lyrics and...

I pull up and save the day Don't want any problems, I'll be a call away I'm ready for action, fly without a cape I'm one of those ones, they'll never beat me

Okay, fair enough, this one can go into the “All” category. But, y’all, when I tell you I felt my soul ascend when I read this line:

You could still be adopted even though you a sibling

I am positive this song represent all of the siblings, now.

10. It’s time for the angst track, everybody. And let me tell you that Let Go by Beau Young Prince has the reverb, the tone, and the soul crushing lyrics for the job. It’s universal angst, too, because this could honestly apply to any of the seven.

Sometimes I don't really know myself Devil on my back, pray for me, need help Angel in the front tryna guide my steps Who do you call when you need some help? Who do you call when you by yourself? Who do you call when you feel down low? I just wanna scream, I just wanna explode … Violence in the streets, I just wanna calm the beast All these problems I'm just fightin' with myself are enemies Looking for my peace while I'm (Looking for my peace while I'm) I just wanna swing and fly away (fly away) I just wanna see a better day (yeah) I just wanna soar and never drown (never drown) I'm looking for my happiness now (now) I just wanna swing and fly away (fly away) I just wanna see a better day (a better day) I just wanna soar and never drown (drown) I'm looking for my happiness now, yeah

11. Scared of the Dark by Lil Wayne & Ty Dolla $ign ft XXXTENACION is one of those tracks that immediately hooks you, pulls you in, and then sucker punches you in the feelings. With that in mind, in both a literal and figurative sense, this song is all about Klaus.

I'm not scared of the dark I'm not running, running, running No, I'm not afraid of the fall I'm not scared, not at all Why would a star, a star ever be afraid of the dark? I'm not scared I'm not scared, even from the start I'm not scared of the dark Of the dark, mmm Tunechi I ain't never scared and I ain't never horrified I just look down at my Rolex, it said it's the darkest times I ain't never terrified, I ain't never petrified You know I see dead people, I just tell 'em, "Get a life" I ain't never scurred, I'm not sure if that's a word, but I mean every word, feelin' like, "Do not disturb, " wait … You know I can read your mind like I'm the author There's a line for tomorrow and that line's gettin' shorter I'm behind the trigger, what if I am the target? Deep sigh, a sayōnara, I ain't afraid to die It's either goodbye or good mornin', and the skies start to fallin' And I'ma shine in the darkness

12. Elevate by DJ Khalil ft. Denzel Curry, YBN Cordae, SwaVay & Trevor Rich has that kind of upbeat tone, can-do attitude, and fun tempo that immediately makes me want to see a scene where the Hargreeves siblings fight a bunch of baddies (together) to this song.

No millimeter, this is my arena I'm the black widow with a bad stinger And I'll make you scream like a bad singer I'm everything that you wanna be plus more Since there's no heroes anymore Jump out the window, then put the mask on Who the bad man that a man gotta bash on? … They will slander me, I just plan to be Somethin' powerful for my family Tried to balance life and my sanity Show a different side of humanity So amazin', keep appraisin' Save you from a home invasion Chasin' robbers from the bank … When the light shine, I go python I've fallen, on my last lifeline There's no way in my right mind My city up on my back tight How can I possibly act right? I'm Robin Hood, I'm the Black Knight I know you heard 'bout my last fight 'Cause I win, over and over again Battlin' evil, I'm hopin' to win Fightin' my demons, I'm nice for a reason Enticed with the bleedin', I'm showin' my sins How can you expect me to stay sane? Protect me My technique go X speed on high waves and jet skis I jump off this building to save these civilians My strength and my honor is trusted by children I'm ready and willing to fight all these villains No chaos or killings, my style is so brilliant … I may have lost the battle but I will not lose the war I can promise you I will not lose this time

13. And finally, Home by Vince Staples has a soulful kind of sound to it that, combined with the lyrics, reminds me that Five will quite literally do anything, endure anything, kill anything, to get back to and protect his family. It also has a kind of epic choral-esque start and finish to it that felt really nice to listen to.

This morning I woke up in a fortress of distortion I'm at war with my emotions, I'm at war with they enforcement Tryna fight for what's right and got sidetracked Where your mind at? Never mind that Can we think in a blink, you swimmin', you sinkin' You win, you leavin' a head where I've loaded my weapon I stay with my brethren, I pay for protection My prey in my sight so I'm doing what's right and not askin' no questions I wanna be home free Where's one that was lonely? But I'm ready and waitin' For my day of salvation, and I'm patient I'm coming home now I'm coming home … Right where I belong now Right where I belong They looking for saviors, I'm looking for safety They never gon' break me, take me Down on my knees, believe I'm never gon' beg or plead Yeah, I never say never, but I guarantee Gather my strength, goin' hard in the paint Paint you a picture, it's put on display I'm gonna get, they don't give then I take Can't take me down now My feet on the ground now Fight 'til I'm down now Say it out loud now Say it out loud, are you ready for war?

And there you have it. If anyone has any suggestions or questions about this challenge feel free to wander into my ask box.

- 57

[iiasha-archived]

After finally catching up with svt news (because I am deep in the nct life because sm said content 24h oof can't keep up) I see pledis is said screw making a full album, let's have carats build this album again :D like now we have to weave shiz? Is this 3rd grade art classes now?

lmao literally i was ready to focus solely on nct but then svt was like nah you fucking carat idiot not when WE’RE also coming back in october

yeah i mean tbh i don’t mind the arts and crafty nature of these recent albums (lowkey haven’t put my heng:garae albums together tho they’re just sitting) i think the weaving thing is cute especially if it really is a friendship bracelet (joshua spoiled that far?) but based on its loom shape i was also thinking it’d be cool if was to like... weave the cover of the album fdasifas but i know a lot of people are probably not about assembling the album to that extent

the concept so far seems a lot more interesting this time too. not to bash on heng:garae bc i loved that album song-wise but the concept was very. normie fadkljda and in general svt have never really had that crazy of concepts??? like i think fear and getting closer were the edgiest they’ve ever gone.

i mean i do still think they’re going for the playful concept here so its still not really out of the box for them but it’s definitely. a little different i guess

[brianandthemays]

Love is a Polaroid (Roger Taylor x reader) Part 16

A/N Eh this isn’t my fav chapter in the world 

THanks to @sweet-ladyy for being amazing in general. I adore you. also thanks for helping make this chapter suck less

please send an ask, leave a comment, reblog let me know!

Word Count: 3.6k

Warnings: Manipulation, angst, some cute shit tho

Masterlist

______________________________

The whole ride home you were thinking about your interaction with Roger. The way his fingers wrapped around your wrist sending shocks up your arm. Five years later and he could still make your heart flutter. But the image you couldn’t get out of your head was his face buried in another girl’s pussy.  

You couldn’t be mad at him, you had moved on as well, but something about it made your stomach sick. The entire night was a blur but for some reason, you remembered that vividly in your mind. Like a brand permanently there. Your fingers started to tighten on the wheel as you thought about it now. Richard had told you later that it was Roger’s new girlfriend, someone he’d been seeing a while apparently. And that was great for him and you didn’t care; but when she wasn’t perched on his knee today, you couldn’t help but be relieved. 

You pulled into your driveway, taking a breath before getting out of the car. You were late, and you knew Richard would be upset but you really just wanted to go to bed. Hopefully, he would understand that.  

Richard was someone you’d met when you moved into the city. He worked for a small paper company as some sort of manager and worked from 9 to 5. He helped you settle into the city, find an apartment and a job and took you out to coffee. He could be a little demanding at times but he was sweet and cared a lot about you, so you put up with it. He was there for you in a weak part of your life. You were alone and scared in an unknown city. When you broke up with Roger you didn’t just lose him, you lost Fred, and Brian, and John. Your sister had moved up to Edinburgh and was completely out of reach. 

Richard picked you up off your feet. You owed him a lot and you were glad to do a little housework if it meant he was happy.  

You walked up to the door, opening it with a sigh as you stepped inside.  

               “Richard?” you called into the house. “I’m home.” 

               “Babe!” He poked his head out from the kitchen door. “You’re late!” 

You gave him a weak smile. “Work was a lot.”  

He hummed sympathetically, nodding his head. “So was mine. Let me tell you some of these salesmen I work with really don’t know what they’re doing.” You opened your mouth to say something, but he continued over you. “They just don’t have any respect for authority and no matter what I do they just continue to waste company time.” He shook his head then sighed looking at you. “I was really looking forward to coming home to some dinner and my beautiful girlfriend.” 

You felt guilt make its way across your body, settling like a ball in your stomach. You looked down at your feet. “I’m really sorry, Richard. Roger was just talking to me.”  

He scoffed. “Roger? Why are you still even talking to him?”  

               “Well, I do work for him and just because we used to date doesn’t mean we can’t be friends,” you reasoned, furrowing your eyebrows. 

               “I really don’t trust him. I think he’ll try and make a move on you,” he replied firmly. “And you’re my girl. I don’t want you hanging around with him too much.” 

               “But--” 

               “You’re really going to fight me on this? You come home late, dinner’s not ready, and now you're going to try and reason why you should be able to see your ex?” he snapped, his fist turning into a ball on the counter. You took a step backward, biting your lip, and turning your eyes downward. He sighed, relaxing his hand. He walked around the counter to you, placing his hands on your shoulders. “I shouldn’t have snapped like that. But I just care about you. Don’t you love me?” 

You nodded, continuing to look down at the ground.   

               “Then let me take care of you. Where would you be without me? Hm?” He hooked his finger around your chin and brought it up to face him. You shrugged. “Nowhere. But I am here. And we’re lucky for that.”  He moved his hand to cup your face and you leaned into it. “I love you. Always remember that I love you.”  

               “I’m sorry, Richard,” you murmured, closing your eyes.  

               “I forgive you, darling.” He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer into his chest. You relished in the warmth he provided. He didn’t smell like Roger. Roger smelt like crisp paper and rain. Roger smelt like warmth and cologne. That cologne he used to wear because he knew you liked it. But that was then, and this was now. “Now are you ready for bed?” 

               “Yes, please!” you giggled, looking up at him. He leaned down a pressed a kiss to your lips. He really did care about you. He always looked out for your best interest, even if you didn’t understand his reasoning. And he had done a lot for you. So, you sighed into the kiss. Smiling as you pulled away.

               “Go on to bed, I’ll be there soon,” he told you, turning you in the direction of your bed. He tapped your behind as you started off, chuckling as you walked away from him.

You made your way into your bed, changing into a baggy shirt and some loose-fitting shorts. You crawled into the sheets, inhaling deeply in the pillow. You turned your head glancing over at the book on your bedside table. The same book that had been there forever. You sat up, leaning your back against the headboard, reaching over to turn on the lamp.

You picked up the book, running a hand over the cover. Then you opened the cover and there was the polaroid. The picture of your Roger. Not this new Roger with bright blonde hair, and charismatic smile. Your Roger with the dirty blonde hair and soft face. Though still with the charismatic smile.

It might be foolish to ponder on days past, but when your wishing for a life you used had one tends to linger. Trying harder and harder to pretend that every relationship was as passionate or true as this one. That the one you currently had, had the same light around it. But the polaroids don’t come out the same anymore but you choose to ignore that. 

You heard Richard start to approach so you quickly turned out the lamp and placed the book back on the table. Laying on your side you waited for Richard to join you. And he did. Like he did every night. And he read to you like every night. And you talked about life like you did every night. And then you fell asleep together like you did every night. And though you tried not to, your mind continually wandered to where Roger was and what Roger was doing. Wondering if he was thinking about you too. And you didn’t know it. But he was.

 Rogers POV

 Seeing her again was like putting kindling in a fire. Things hadn’t ended on the best of terms between the two of them. He was so angry with her for a long time. As he drove away from her house that night he hated her and all that they had been through. But eventually, that hate turned into grief. And he realized that he was mad at her, but he could never really hate her.

So, instead, he shoved her out of his mind. Pushing her into the darkest corner where he would never find her. Or so he thought. He moved on. Going on tour and returning to his old ways. Girls threw themselves at him and he let them. He’d choose one every night and wake up the next morning feeling empty and hurt. Just like before he met her.

She was always different. She talked to him differently, smiled at him differently, kissed him differently. She treated him more like a person than a conquest. But months turned into years and he never heard a word from her. Never saw her or knew where she was. And years turned into half a decade.

He was drunk but not that drunk when he saw her again. And when he did, he almost didn’t believe it was her. One second, he’d been pleasuring some chick at a party then it was her. And from that deep, dark corner of his mind came out everything he had felt about her. The anger, the grief, the love. All of it came flooding back. But she was plastered; he found her downing shots in the kitchen.

But she was beautiful. Even more so than when they were in college. He knew Freddie had gotten her hired to work for them, but he wasn’t sure what to expect. But there she was. Her make up done perfectly but he could see past that to how she had changed. The only thing that concerned him was her eyes, they looked… sad. He couldn’t put a finger on exactly why, but they were sad. He knew he should have gotten her to stop drinking sooner, but by then it was too late. Then her boyfriend showed up.

Richard was someone Roger automatically disliked. He had a condescending tone to him and he had a weird look to him. Something about him set Roger off and seeing him so close to her made his blood boil. He had no claim to her, he lost that a long time ago, but the more he learned about this guy the more he disliked him. 

Roger pulled up to the studio around nine this morning. They were recording some tracks for a bonus album and messing around with the instruments some more. She was going to be there again. Something about Reid needing to give her something to do. He chuckled to himself, knowing that she would somehow find her way out of busywork.

When he walked inside, she was already there, writing furiously at some notebook she had set out on the table.

               “Morning,” he greeted, going over to grab his drumsticks. She jolted slightly as if surprised by his presence. He smirked, shaking his head. “Didn’t mean to scare you, love.” She just stared at him; mouth slightly open as if she was struggling to say something. “Everything alright?”

She blinked before shaking her head. “Uh, yeah! Everything’s fine.”

She turned back down her paper, her pin still over where she had left off. She turned her head to the side and looked back over at him. “Are the other boys here too?”

               “No, I’m early. Wanted to get a little practice in before everyone else arrives.” He shrugged, twirling his drumstick.

               “Oh, I guess I’m earlier than I thought,” she stated, sitting back on the couch. Roger stared at her as she furrowed her eyebrows and scrunched her nose. Just like she used to when she got a thought. He shrugged and headed into the studio walking over to his kit.

As he tuned it and prepared to play, he couldn’t help but look over his shoulder at her only to find her looking at him. There was a storm going on in her head that much he could tell. Her eyes were tired, and her forehead creased as she looked at him. Just as he was finishing up, she stood up and walked into the studio.

               “You know,” she started, walking over to the kit. “You never taught me how to play.”

He smirked and flipped his drumstick again. That night under the stars was a perfect example of their idolized relationship. He had promised her to play the drums and just never got to it. The distance and the busyness; whenever they were together, they didn’t want to waste it on that. He nodded his head towards the drums, watching as she smiled and hopped towards him. He shook his head, chuckling as he made his way towards his seat.

               “Where am I sitting?” she asked, looking for another chair.

               “Right here, silly.” He scooted back so there was a sliver of room on the chair for her to sit in front of him. Her smile fell for a moment as she realized what he meant. There was that war again. Her eyes grew clouded for a moment before she shook her head and gave a tight smile. She walked over and sat down, leaning her back against his chest.

               “Okay, so what do I do?” she giggled, taking the drumsticks from his hand.

               “Okay so hit this one.” He pointed at a drum to the left. She tapped it with her stick, a dull thump coming out of the drum. He laughed, shaking his head. “No, you gotta put some feeling in it.”

               “Feeling?” she giggled, shaking her hips slightly. “Like that?”

               “No, no, no,” he snorted. “Here.” He took her wrists in his hand held her hands still. “Like this.”

He guided her hands through a rhythm, laughing at themselves as they stumbled their way through it. It was nice to see her smile again. A real smile. Not the fake one she wears most of the time but a real smile that he hadn’t seen in five years. Eventually, he pulled his hands away and she did the rhythm all by herself.

               “Roger! I did it!” she squealed, throwing her hands in the air. And it was in that moment that he realized that he was completely and totally in love with her. In that moment, time slowed down and it was just her and her smile. Just like that day in August five years ago.

               “It’s no problem, love,” he mumbled, returning her smile. His cheeks started to burn slightly. And she noticed, her eyes dropping again, the light that was in her eyes leaving. Then there was a door slamming and they both look back at the booth. “Is that—”

               “Fuck, Richard.” She scrambled off him and started towards the door. Richard looked mad. Beyond mad he was pissed. He glared at Roger before turning around and storming out to of the booth. “Richard! Wait!” Roger stood and went to follow her, but she just whipped around and shouted at him. “Just stay here, please.”

And with that she ran out the door, calling after Richard. He cursed, throwing his drumstick at the wall. How could he be so stupid? This was just like when he saw her the first time. Something about her continued to have a hold of him and he didn’t want to break loose. He didn’t want to lose her. She had him wrapped around her finger. He still loved her. And he was letting her getaway.

He turned on his head and flung open the door, running after her. But right as he tried to open the door, it flew open.

               “What on earth is going on in here?” Freddie exclaimed, throwing his arms in the air. Roger blew air through his nose and pushed Freddie aside walking out the door. He raced to the parking lot. But he could hear Richard before he saw him.

               “We discussed this last night and you’re already going to fuck him?” Richard was shouting. “What the hell are you thinking?”

               “Please it’s not what you think!” That was (Y/N). “He was just showing me how to play the drums.”

               “You really think I’m dumb enough to believe that?”

Roger rounded the corner, ready to intervene but was pulled back by someone else. John had a grip on Roger’s shoulder and was pulling him away.

               “Don’t get in between that,” he recommended, pulling Roger inside. “Trust me, you’ll just make it worse.”

               “God, I want to strangle that guy,” Roger growled, throwing Deaky’s hand off his shoulder.

Deaky huffed a laugh, rolling his eyes. “The feeling’s mutual. He came into Fred’s party the other night acting like a worried mother. Made me spill my drink on Ronnie.”

Roger looked over his shoulder at the door, narrowing his eyes. But then he relaxed his forehead, running a hand through his hair. John looked at him sympathetically.

               “I made her smile today…” Roger told him, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I haven’t seen her smile like that in a while.”

Roger’s mind was racing. In the past three days, Roger had felt more for a woman he can’t have than he had for any of the women he’d slept with in the past five years. Five years it’d been and all emotions he’d shoved away were so easily pulled back to the forefront of his mind. But now it was ten times stronger.

               “It’s nice,” John remarked, smiling knowingly at Roger.

               “What?” Roger glanced over at John.

               “Seeing you like this again.”

Roger turned his head over to Deaky, seeing his smile. He wanted to shout at him and tell him just how wrong he was, but John knew him way to well to lie. He just shook his head and let out a groan.

               “I am in a pickle, aren’t I?” Roger chuckled, slinging an arm around John’s neck.

               “A complete jam, my friend,” John replied, patting Roger’s back. “Now let’s get started on this damn song, shall we?”

               “I think we shall,” Roger sighed with a final glance over his shoulder.

They made their way back into the studio where Brian had joined them in the booth. It wasn’t long before they’d sent in Roger to lay down the drums for the track. While Roger was drumming, (Y/N) walked back into the booth, silently sitting back down on the couch. None of the boys made a commotion about it, a spatter of hellos and returning to their work.

She didn’t look up at him, continuing her paperwork without so much as a glance. Roger wet his lips, looking over at John who motioned for him to sit next to her. So, he did. He went to sit down next to her, not missing how she flinched away from him. He also didn’t miss the way her nose sniffled giving away that she’d been crying. He wanted to comfort her. Give her some sign that he was there for her.

He glanced at her free hand, resting on the couch near him. He reached for it, laying his hand over hers. Her pen stilled, frigid in her grasp. He started bringing it to his face, but she ripped her hand out of his grasp, snapping her head to look at him. The look in her eye made Roger take a step back. She looked angry, but also scared and another emotion he could describe. Her eyes were still red from tears and she stood, rushing out of the room.

This time, Roger didn’t hesitate. He followed her out of the room.

               “(Y/N), what’s wrong?” He called after her.

She spun around coming face to face with him. “You can’t do this to me, Roger.”

               “Do what?” he questioned, furrowing his eyebrows.

               “You know damn well what,” she spat. “I’m dating Richard now, and he makes me very happy.”

Roger snorted, hearing his pulse in his ear. “Oh, does he now?”

He didn’t know why he said it, and he immediately regretted it, but it was out there and there was no going back. Her mouth dropped and she thinned her lips, cocking her hips to the side.

               “What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Richard loves me!” Her words were strong, but he could tell she was faltering. He didn’t know why he wanted to start this fight now, but the words just kept coming out of his mouth.

               “Oh, and he told you that?” he spat back at her. That hurt her. Her eyes went wide and her mouth began opening and closing as she tried to find something to say. “Since when did you learn what love is anyways.”

She narrowed her eyes at him, taking a deep breath. He wanted to take it back. Take back this whole bloody day.

               “I need you to stay away from me, Roger,” she growled. “For your own sake as much as mine.”

               “What does that even mean?” he sneered.

               “It means you really pissed Richard off,” she hissed. “And I need you to leave me alone.”

Roger took a step back, processing her words. She wanted him to ignore her, pretend that his feelings didn’t exist. Pretend that they weren’t even friends. He found himself shaking his head, raising his eyebrows.

               “(Y/N), I can’t—you know I –”

               “I honestly couldn’t care less, Roger,” she said in defeat. “Richard told me not to see you anymore, and I honestly can’t disagree.”

With that, she turned around and walked out the door. Roger found himself glued to his spot, a sinking feeling making its way into his heart. He lost her. She was gone. When he drove away from her house five years ago, he made the biggest mistake of his life.

He dug his hand into his pocket, fishing for his wallet. When he found it, he pulled it out and opened it. There, sitting in his wallet, was that polaroid he had of her. The very first picture he ever took of her. Behind the drums, looking for the shoes he had hidden from her.

That was his (Y/N) and he lost her. But he wasn’t going to give up. He was going to find her and let her know that he loved her. He loved her and he would do anything for her. She would be safe again. Even if it wasn’t right now, or tomorrow. He would be with her again.

___________________________________

@zodiacal-dust-and-curls @leah-halliwell92 @angiefangirlworld-2 @dove-turned-destroyer @16wiishes @queenismyrealdad @blondecarfucker @chlobo6 @wolverinesbeer @onevisionliz @catnissprior-blog @thewinchesterchronicles @brianmays-badgers @aninthitha 

[vanaera]

Heya my lovely friend! 20, 26, 31, 32, 33, and 39 for the ask meme ✨✨

GURL, YOU TOO??? OMYGOD Y'ALL COMING TO MY INBOX AND MAKING ME CRY FROM SO MUCH LOVE, EYE-

20: Disney, Dreamworks, or Pixar?

I'd say Dreamworks! I'm really fond of films, those that star a real person or animated ones. However, I usually tend to prefer the former because of of my appreciation for the classic filming. And among these three, Dreamworks feature one of the best movies I like. Like Shutter Island, Lincoln, and The Ring. They are so GREAT like do I even have to explain??? Not to say Dreamworks animations like How to Train Your Dragon, The Shrek, Over the Hedge, Kung Fu Panda, and Megamind are films I would still want to watch again to this day. Of course Dreamworks has failures too, such as The Shark Tale and The Boss Baby. However, compared to Pixar and Disney (should I even separate them when they belong to one humongous conglomerate now?), Dreamworks have one of the most original stories I've ever encountered. Their characters are so fleshed out. They have notable positive traits, and flaws you can easily spot, which makes them feel so real. No tea to Disney and Pixar, but they usually have SoOOOOo many passable movies. Like "okay, i made a movie, guess that's okay" type of movies. They have very generic and predictable plotlines and most of their characters are just cardboard cut-outs of the typical protagonists. Sorry this is long. I'm really passionate about film. Music-wise tho, it goes to Disney. However since we're talking about film, not an album, screenplays matter to me the most.

26: What would you do if someone gave you flowers? 

I would put those flowers in a vase and I would appreciate that someone who gave them to me. Especially if they researched the language of the flowers they've gifted me before giving them to me. If not, that's still okay. There's just gonna be plus points for the former. Though even if they are the former or the latter, I would still ask them why they gave me flowers instead of fruits. I love flowers though and I would really like to receive a bouquet because I've never experienced being given one. I just wanna know why not fruits.

31:  Are you a fashionable person?

Oh hell yeah am I. I make the world my runway. And what I think is quirky about this thing with me, is that I don't follow the trends. I make my own trend. It's my pet peeve to see everybody almost wearing the same clothes just like everyone else. And, I just want to not be like that. I want to stand out (Sorry, the Aries in me is quaking). This is why I love LOVE the no-clothing-code in our universities because I can totally rock a grunge bitch outfit to a cutie girly girl look whenever I want. Even if I'm just wearing a jeans and shirt outfit, I'm sure as hell gonna spice some things up (not skin-showing-wise tho) and make you see I'm not JUST wearing some jeans and shirt. It's MY jeans and shirt outfit (I'm really passionate about fashion like srsly come hit me up if you need some fashion advice).

32: Do you like watching holiday movies?

It depends. If I want to get in the mood of Christmas, bc let's be real, adulthood makes us no longer feel the giddty feeling we used to have when we were kids when it comes to Christmas, then yeah, I'd like to watch holiday films. However, if they have a fucking terrible screenplay, I'd rather not waste my time. I like wating holiday-themed foods, fics, and short stories though.

33: Cookies or brownies?

Cookies!!! I love the hard but chewy and soft texture ir has and also the balance in its flavor! I don't like foods that are too sweet and it's not long ago I just discovered I'm allergic to some types of chocolate so brownies are just 😕 to me.

39: What’s your favorite random piece of decor in your house and room?

I don't have a favorite piece of decor aesthetic-wise. So I'm gonna go for practicality wise (I don't buy things that I won't use just for the sake of aesthetics, I love me a clean, and wide ass space in my home). And also, I can't rhink of any random stuff I love because my stuff here are not random lmao. In my house, I love my dining table. It's where I eat, do my nails, do my art, or work on my writings, while I watch the view of the sky from the windows near it. That table just has so many memories for me. And in my room, I love my work desk. It's where I put my bullet journal, skin care stuff, and writings-wise stuff. I just love how I put them in this way bc these things give me a sense of who I am in their own way. And also they give me a false sense of productivity for the day when they look so nice on that desk LMAO