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#I miss this trio every day
personinthepalace · 10 months
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I approve of this year’s youtube recap :’)
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astragatwo · 10 months
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The new W Corp besties
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decembermoonskz · 1 year
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me after p9-12…
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starburstgalexies · 2 years
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Me eating the cybedonari feast in the windblume: delicious
Me savoring the aecyno crumbs in the windblume: also delicious. Love is love :)
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tikklil · 6 months
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Come hang out with the trio!!
I miss them every day 😩
Get this on a shirt !
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augustinewrites · 3 months
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jealous zhongli my beloved
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nestled right in the heart of qiaoying village sits a cozy little apothecary run by you and zhongli. 
your little shop is popular for locals and tourists alike, perfect for people looking for natural remedies or just a new tea brew. today is a little bit slower, with everyone in liyue harbor celebrating lantern rite. so zhongli sits in the back with a half drained cup of tea, reviewing the shop’s finances and balancing the books while you work up front, greeting and assisting the last few customers of the afternoon. 
every so often he lets his focus drift to where you’re working, passing out unlit sparklers to a trio of young children. you shake your head when their parents try to pay, smiling softly when the young ones thank you excitedly and rush out, dragging the adults behind them. 
zhongli’s mind begins to wander to the future, as it often does on days such as this. perhaps next year, you’d be handing sparklers to children of your own.
“are you almost ready to go?” you ask, appearing in the doorway, just as he’s brainstorming baby names in the margins of his work. “i’m waiting on one last gentleman, then we can close for the day.”
zhongli leans back, watching you with a measured expression as he considers your words. “i see. may i ask who this gentleman is? he must be important, if we’re waiting for his business.” 
amusement dances across your expression. “he came by yesterday while you were in the city, inquiring about teas. i think you’d enjoy his company, he reminded me of you. incredibly knowledgeable, wise beyond his years, not to mention very handsome…”
now he was really aching to leave, but not to the harbor to witness the festivities. he was aching to take you home, grab his spear, then return and wait for this gentleman.
you look over your shoulder when the bell at the front door tinkles. “oh! there he is!” 
“i should greet him,” zhongli suggests (though it doesn't really sound like a suggestion). “i'm sure we have much to discuss.”
“alright, my love. lead the way,” you tease, letting him position himself in front of you. 
zhongli forces a somewhat pleasant smile and tone as he greets the customer clad in the fineries of…fontaine. 
it takes all of three seconds for him to realize that this is no customer. 
but he can't do anything, not in front of you, and he’s sure the hydro dragon wouldn't be so foolish to threaten the safety of one’s mate. 
“monsieur neuvillette!” you greet cheerily, peeking around zhongli’s defensive stance. “i have the tea blends you ordered stored in the back. i’ll go grab them.” 
so begins a true gentleman’s argument. 
“welcome. is there anything i can assist you with in the meantime?” (why have you come?)
the chief justice smiles, though it looks practiced and every bit as forced as zhongli’s. “i’ve just come because i admire fair prices.” (i've come for justice)
zhongli has always known this confrontation would come. though the authority of the original elemental dragons has disappeared from the world, a new generation has come to reclaim what was lost. 
“i see.” (i see)
“i've heard much about this place from the locals.” neuvillette says, fearlessly holding eye contact with the archon. “you’ve created quite the human life for yourself, morax. an artifact appraiser, funeral consultant, and now you run a successful apothecary with your lovely mate.”
something old, draconic, possessive rumbles through veins. 
neuvillette merely chuckles as the earth beneath the shop trembles lightly. 
though you return just in time to quell the impending earthquake, zhongli’s possessiveness flares through no fault of his own. dragons mate for life, and though he has the utmost trust in you, he does not trust the dragon from fontaine smiling so politely at you. 
with his gaze narrowed so dangerously, he misses the amused look you cast up at him when his hand grasps your waist, securing you at his side. 
“thank you for your patronage, monsieur, but we are now closed. safe travels back to fontaine.”
he doesn't bother waiting for a reply, dragging you away from the counter and into the back room as you try to look over your shoulder.
“thank you for coming, monsieur–”
zhongli presses his lips to yours before you can say his name, the hand not gripping your waist cupping the back of your neck as he crowds you against the wall. 
there’s only one, foolproof way to mark you as his.
good thing he already has names picked out.
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rebelliousstories · 2 months
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Different Time
Relationship: Remy LeBeau/Gambit x Reader
Fandom: X-Men
Request: Yes by Anon
Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Mentions of Blood and Violence, Strong Language, Happy Endings
Word Count: 2,358
Main Masterlist: Here
X-Men Masterlist: Here
Summary: Being dragged into the Void by your good buddy Wade was not how you imagined to be spending your days after your lover had died.
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A single card was fixed between her fingers as she walked behind the other two people on their journey. There was silence all around the trio as they walked through the field. She did not pay attention to what was being said, nor did she care very much. If it was of any importance to her, they would let her know.
Before she knew what was going on, a dog was running straight for them. But the man with long, flowing locks that was running behind made her finger tingle with energy. After Deadpool and the Wolverine ahead of her did not move to attack the man, she let that energy fizzle out. Not that it would have done much damage anyways. It was getting harder and harder to remember what it was like. And yet, she could see it so clearly in her mind; the first time he had shown her what he could do.
“So what can you do exactly? You just throw cards at people?”
“Nah, cher,” his hands came up to hold a card between his fingers, “is much more den dat. I charge da playin’ cards wit energy. And den dey go boom.” His chuckle followed shortly afterwards.
“Is that so huh?” She chuckled as well. But the man just smiled, and wrapped his arms around her anyways.
“See is like dis, cher. Watch and learn.”
With his arms around her, he held an ace of hearts. Flicking it in the air caused a pink glow to encompass it. She giggled as he swiped the card from the sky, and touched it to her skin. The resulting kinetic energy made her entire body jolt, but the man kept her grounded as it flowed through each and every muscle.
“Feel dat, cher?” His breath fanned across her cheek as she rested against his chest. Once she had recovered, she held her hand and felt the card laid in her palm. Flipping it over through her fingers, she managed to produce a glow and a light crackling energy field around the object.
“Atta girl, cher.” A kiss was laid upon her cheek, and she felt the day old scruff rub against the crook of her neck.
“You comin’, bub?” A gruff voice pulled her out of her thoughts. Snapping into reality, the three men in front of her were looking like they were off to go somewhere.
“Apologies,” came her reply.
“Did we just miss some exposition about you? I feel like we just missed a vital flashback into your tragic backstory. Besides, I would like to find out what you do exactly. We’ve never gotten a clear answer. You just sort of do everything, like Taylor Swift.” Wade was having none of her dismissal.
“What are you talking about?” She was utterly confused, but Logan waved the red menace of off.
“Don’t pay him any mind. Come on, let’s go.” They all made the trek out to the dense corn that housed an old Honda Odyssey, which made the merc in red pitch a hissy fit.
“Get in the fucking car.” Logan snapped at Wade, utterly feed up with his antics. Before being prompted, she threw open the side door and climbed n the back. She watched as Deadpool tried to run off with the sweet little pup that had found them, but Wolverine put a very fast stop to that. Defeated, Wade climbed in the passenger seat, while Logan went in the driver’s, and they were off.
Somewhere along the way, she must have dozed off. That was the only explanation for the memory she was experiencing right now. Except, she was not exactly experiencing it as t had happened. No, she was watching it from an outsider’s perspective.
The first thing she saw, was a dingy old motel room floor. And the next, was laughing. Looking up, she saw them. It was her, and her beau play fighting on the bed of the motel room.
“Now, you know bettah den to play dirty, cher. Ain’t no coyon, ya know?” Her lover had trapped her arms to her body, and was smiling as big as ever. Plush lips stretched across his face. Hazel eyes twinkled brightly.
“Didn’t hear you complaining about me playing dirty last night,” she teased. Turning in his arms, she looked up at her lover with nothing but adoration.
“Well, Gambit seems to remember you not complainin’ neither.” His lips came down onto hers.
Watching from her spot near the dresser, the future her could still feel the wonderful pressure of their kiss. Tracing her fingers over her own, melancholy filled her heart. He looked so alive in this moment. A moment that she cherished with her whole being.
“Ahh!”
Something far less pleasant awoke her this time from her thoughts. One of Wade’s knives had lodged itself in her shin. Blood steadily poured itself from the wound. And the world fell still for a moment. Raising her eyes, she felt herself shaking in anger and pain as Deadpool met her gaze.
“Oh no. Oh, I am so sorry.” He wheezed. But it was too late.
Her other leg raised and kicked him hard in the head. While he was disoriented, her mind contorted the blade that was in his hands; even the hand that was holding the knife began to bend and break. Holding her knee, she made herself fall through the car and onto the ground below.
“Where’d she go? Magic woman.” She heard Deadpool exclaim loudly. It was followed by a growl and a squeak. And the car started to rock with the force that they were going at each other.
Rolling to her right, she got out from underneath the vehicle before someone sent a blade through to her again. Releasing her leg, she crawled on her belly over to a tree that was still facing the car. Her forearms were covered in dirt and leaves now, as were the entire lower half of her body. While keeping an eye on the Odyssey, she worked to remove her boots and rolled up the pants from her injured leg. She could see the wound eventually and worked to clear her mind.
Regenerating always took a lot from her. It took a lot physically and mentally from her, but she could get it done. Groans slipped from her lips as she could feel her skin, muscles, and even veins being to stitch themselves together. A scar was all that was left in the place of the stab wound. The woman rested against the large piece of wood behind her and watched through blackening vision as both men were thrown through the car, and jumped back in with fervor.
That was the image that she passed out to. That was the last thing in the real world that she saw. She was not sure how much time had passed between her passing out, and when she woke up. But she immediately recognized that she was not where she was before. There were stone walls all around her, and she was lying down on a bed. Before sitting up, she looked and could see Logan with a bottle of liquor to her right.
Voices were muffled all around her. She could not pin point a specific one, but something felt off. Like someone or something was there, and how that was supposed to make her feel, she did not know. Groaning, she sat up and caught the attention of everyone else that was talking. One person much more than anyone else. A familiar drawl called out her name, and her body filled with dread. Footsteps came closer, and the muffs came off from her ear.
“Cher, that you?” Her heart sped up and it felt like it was beating out of her chest. A hand came to her shoulder, but she was not having whatever weird illusion this was. Grabbing whoever’s wrist this was, she used her body weight and center of gravity to pivot the person onto their back on the floor beside the bed she was on.
Staring down, her heart stopped. This was her beau. Remy was staring up at her with wide eyes. Letting out a shaking breath, her hands let go of the man as if he had burned her and stood upon shaking legs. The man on the ground was not doing much better than her. He stood just as quickly, and looked at the woman just the same.
“Oh, thank you Lord. It is you.” He whispered, taking a step closer. But her hand shot up to stop him from getting closer.
“Don’t. Who the hell are you? And what are you doing with that suit on?” She demanded, and watched the confusion sink in.
“Cher, it’s me. It’s your Gambit. I’m jus’ wonderin’ how in da hell you here now.” Remy breathed.
“Oh my god!” Everyone’s attention was brought to Deadpool who was wide eyed in his mask. “This is your tragic backstory. You and him…”
“I need some air.” She turned on her heels, and phased through her wall till she was outside in the forest. Outside, she tried to draw in a deep breath, but found her body starting to seize. Everything got too much. Shaky limbs and sweaty palms found themselves crashing onto the forest floor. She tried to breathe in again but only managed half a breath. Her heart was beating out of her chest. The world began to spin.
“Ay, ay, you alright, cher. Come ‘ere. Let’s settle on down now, ya.” Thick arms encompassed her. They grounded her back to reality. As Remy kept whispering soothing words, she felt her world come back into focus. Her heart slowed down and was now moving at a steady rhythm. She was following Remy’s lead on her breaths; in through the nose for four, hold for four, out for four. Her arms and legs were soothing themselves out and she was able to wipe off her palms onto the legs of her suit.
“Dat’s a good girl, now. Ain’t no reason to be like dat. Just a little frightenin’ is all. Didn’ mean to.” He was apologizing for scaring her? After she had thrown him to the ground and walked out on everyone? Those arms felt so familiar and comforting; she did not want to move rom them. But she had to face this man. She had to know. Turning, her eyes finally came up close and personal with the man that had introduced himself as Gambit, Remy LeBeau.
“You good now, cher? Feelin’ a little bettah?” Even after all of this, he was still so caring.
“Yeah. How are you alive?” She whispered, tracing her eyes over every inch of his face like this was the last time she was going to see it. Because it just might.
“I been wonderin’ da same thing. Don’t know how long I been in dis here Void, but you was gone long before I got here.” One of his hands came up and pet her head so very softly.
“I’ll show you mine if you show me yours?” Her attempt at a joke made the Cajun chuckle as well. Sure, both of their laughs were tinged with sadness, but they were laughing together again.
“Well, I uh-” he stammered, trying to find the right words, “was out playin’ cards. Got a feelin’ dat somethin’ was wrong. Went back to the apartment we was stayin’ in. And you… you were gone when I got there. Tracked down who had killed ya, and it turned out to be my ol’ thievin’ ring. Didn’ like da fact dat we was ‘bout to get outta da game apparently. Da hardest thing Remy ever done was buryin’ you. Easiest was killin’ da sons o’ bitches dat took you from me.”
Silence enveloped them as the weight of his words sunk in.
“Something very similar happened in my timeline.” She replied, watching as he seemed to going through the same emotions she was.
“We were on our way back from a mission for Xavier. You and I were with Jean, Scott, and Storm. God, she was making so many jokes about how she was the fifth wheel on that mission and we were making it worse for her. Anyways, we got ambushed by the Brotherhood. We were actually taking out a good chunk of them, but Sabertooth got the drop on you. You bled out in my arms on the way back to the mansion. You had me promise not to do anything rash in the aftermath, but it was difficult.”
Tears welled in both of their eyes. Both of them mourning a love and life lost in tragic fashion. Remy pulled her in close, and she breathed in deeply. That familiar leather and musk scent blended with the fresh air outside. She just wanted that scent bottled up and kept with her at all times.
“So it seems to ol’ Gambit dat we both lost our other half. Maybe you was supposed to be the one that completed my deck, cher.” Her head raised and her eyebrow as she turned to look at the man in confusion.
“You’ve got an incomplete deck,” came her question. She began feeling around for a pocket in her jacket that was directly over her heart.
“Jus’ missin’ one card. Whatchu lookin’ for?” He questioned, letting her move around freely.
“Get your deck out,” his eyebrows raised. “Your card deck, Gambit. Humor me.”
“Whatevea you say, cher.”
The duo shifted until their respective items were grabbed. Remy produced a deck of cards and quickly rearranged them to be in card order. Her card was in between her first two fingers. As Gambit sifted through his deck, he stopped right where a card was missing. And as she revealed what was in her hands, the two suddenly looked at each other with love and tears. Her ace of hearts was missing from his deck, but he had finally found it again. It was a different time, different place, even a different person, but it was the same love that spanned the multiverse.
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nina-ya · 5 months
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Can we have some more premature ejaculation hcs? Dealer's choice
Premature Ejaculation With the Monster Trio + Law
A/N: Anon i hope you know that i was writing this before you even requested it so i need you to kindly evict my brain thank you very much sdflfsdj Parings: Luffy x reader, Zoro x reader, Sanji x reader, Law x reader (all separate) CW: Penetrative sex (zoro and luffy), sanji cums in his pants, oral male recieving (law), ummmm idk what else to put if anyone notes anything i missed let me know! WC: 2.2k total ~400-600 each.
You’d been teasing Luffy all day with light touches and coy glances, watching as he grew more and more restless as the hours passed. By the time most of the crew retired to sleep, Luffy was practically bouncing with anticipation, unable to contain his energy for much longer.
The moment you were alone, he was on you, pressing you against the wall with a force that nearly knocked the wind out of you. His lips met yours in a heated kiss, his hands grabbing at your body eagerly. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer as his body pressed against yours. You could already feel his erection in his pants. His lips parted as a half groan, half whimper escaped his throat as he grew more and more eager to be inside of you.
As your hands dragged along his chest, feeling each and every muscle of his abdomen, he peeled away your bottoms rather quickly, along with his own in a burst of urgency. He grabbed you by the waist and led you backwards until you fell onto a bed, and Luffy climbed over you, his grin wide as he leaned down to kiss you again.
His lips traveled down your neck, his breath hot against your skin as he kissed every open surface he could find. His hands gripped your thighs, spreading them apart as he settled between them, his cock already poking at your entrance with an impatience that made you gasp. You felt his tip rub across your dripping hole, using the wetness to slicken himself up before he pushed into you with a groan. Luffy set a frantic pace as he buried himself inside you. “Ngh, you’re so tight,” he whined out, his voice strained as he thrust into you. Each thrust was filled with a desperate need, his desire for you evident as he chased his own release. “Ah, ah, ah, so good!”
You could hear the neediness dripping from his voice, and just as you felt your own pleasure starting to build, his rhythm faltered, his body tensing with a choked gasp. “Oh, ah, I'm gonna-,” he whimpered, his hips bucking into you as he came, spilling into you with a trembling release. The suddenness of his climax took both of you by surprise, his breathing heavy as he collapsed against you.
“‘m sorry,” he mumbled into your skin, his voice still lust laden. “I—I couldn’t hold it. It just felt…” he trailed off, seemingly struggling to find the right words in his post-euphoric state.
You couldn’t help but find his inability to hold back quite amusing. You reached up and brushed his hair back out of his eyes, a gentle smile playing on your lips as you stroked his cheek. “It’s okay,” you said, trying to reassure him despite the tinge of disappointment that the moment couldn’t last long enough for you to finish. You figured it would only be a little while longer before he recovered so you could keep going, but as he lay against you, his breathing calming, you noticed something odd.
Luffy wasn’t pulling out, and he wasn’t getting softer.
You were confused. It was as if he hadn’t just climaxed a moment ago. He let out a low groan, shifting slightly as if he was getting in position to go at it again.
“Wait, Luffy?... Already?” you asked, seemingly confused, yet you couldn’t help but feel rather happy at the idea that he could go for another round so soon.
It seemed as if he had newfound energy coursing through him, and he looked at you with a grin, as if that earlier climax was just a warm-up. He leaned down and kissed you, mumbling against your lips, “You just felt so good.” He rolled his hips into yours, swallowing the gasp that was pulled from you. “Just want a bit more,” he added, his hands roaming down to your hips, grabbing them firmly as he hoisted you up, getting into position to set a brutal pace once more. You had a long night ahead of you.
---
Zoro is usually the one in control, on top, his large body pressing you into the mattress with each thrust. He knew how to hit all the right spots, and it was utterly intoxicating. You moaned out his name, clutching onto his shoulders as he moved within you, setting a pace that made it difficult to think of anything but the feeling of his cock dragging in and out of you.
He leaned down to capture your lips in a kiss, rolling his hips into yours at a slower pace—a brief pause to let you catch your breath. You took advantage of the break, lightly pushing on his chest. He broke the kiss, gave you a knowing look, then flipped himself off you and onto his back. You then crawled over him and straddled him with a playful grin.
You took hold of his cock, lining it up with your entrance, rubbing your shared slick onto his tip but not quite putting it in yet. His hands flew to your hips, his grip tightening as he urged you downward, groaning, "Don't be a tease." At his words, you sank down onto his cock, the stretch drawing sighs and groans of pleasure from both of you. As you descended, feeling the full length of him inside you, the sensation was almost overwhelming—he was filling you up in all the right ways.
His grip on your hips tightened, his knuckles nearly turning white from the pressure as he tried to keep his composure. You could see the tension in his muscles as he struggled to maintain some semblance of control, his deep groans filling the room.
“Fuck, you’re so tight,” he muttered, his voice a low growl as you started to rock your hips. You set a slower pace, yet you could tell he was struggling to hold on, his brows knit in concentration as he fought to maintain restraint. But with each slow, deliberate roll of your hips, his control seemed to slip further and further away.
“Wait,” he gasped, his eyes squeezing shut as his hips bucked slightly beneath you. “Don’t—” His words were cut off by a sharp groan as you continued to move.
“Zoro~” you said, a playful edge to your voice as you placed your hands on his chest to anchor yourself as you rode him. “What's wrong? Hmm?”
He grunted in response, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he tried to steady you. “I’m serious,” he breathed, his voice strained. “If you keep doing that, I’m gonna—”
But it was too late. With one last roll of your hips, you felt him tense beneath you, his body shuddering as he reached his breaking point. A low, guttural moan escaped his lips as he came, his cum releasing into you in hot spurts. His head tilted back, his muscles clenching as he gave in to the pleasure, the hands on your hips holding you in place onto him as he released inside you.
You couldn’t help but feel some amusement as you looked down at him, his euphoric expression mixed with embarrassment was certainly a sight to enjoy. “Damn it,” he muttered, his cheeks flushing with color.
You leaned down and placed a slow kiss on his lips, pulling back slightly with a playful smirk. “Mmm, that was cute,” you started. “But I’m not done yet.” And with that, you started your movements again, picking up pace as you started to bounce on him with a rhythm that made him groan nearly instantaneously. The sounds escaping his lips were like music to your ears, and you knew you had him exactly where you wanted him.
---
Sanji's lips were hot against yours, the eagerness of the kiss making your head spin. His hands roamed your body, grabbing and squeezing at whatever he could as he deepened the kiss, his tongue sliding into your mouth with a hunger and desire that was heady.
You pressed your body against his, feeling his erection grow by the second as he grinded his hips into you. His throbbing cock pressed against your thigh, and you couldn’t help but smirk into the kiss as you slid your hand down to rub against him, teasing him with each movement of your hand.
Your other hand then traveled to his hair, your fingers threading through his blonde locks, giving it a gentle tug that elicited a breathy moan from him. His lips parted from yours with a soft gasp, eyes glazed over with thirst as he met your gaze.
“Merde,” he cursed under his breath, his hips instinctively grinding against your hand in response to each and every touch. His own hands traced the curves of your hips and waist, the softness of your thighs, leaving behind goosebumps.
He pressed his forehead against yours, his breath coming out in shallow pants as he continued his movements, his arousal growing with each movement against your hand. Soon, a low, shuddering moan escaped Sanji’s lips, his body trembling against yours as you felt the fabric beneath your hand dampen. His body slumped over yours, his chest heaving as he caught his breath, cheeks turning red seemingly at the embarrassment of finishing before his pants even came off.
When you realized what had happened, you couldn’t help but chuckle softly, pressing a kiss to his cheek as you ran your fingers through his hair. “Couldn’t hold back, huh?” you teased, feeling a sense of triumph at the way his cheeks flushed a deeper shade of red at your words.
Sanji let out a breathless laugh, his voice soft and filled with lingering pleasure. “I’m sorry,” he murmured, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you against him. His lips found yours again, capturing them in a slow, tender kiss, pulling back just to whisper, “Trust me, I am going to make it up to you.”
---
You traced your fingers along the waistband of Law’s pants, his impatience growing as you unbuttoned them, pulling the zipper down with a teasing slowness. You could see his eagerness in the way his hands couldn't stand still—one hand fidgeting with the bedsheets beneath him, the other behind your head, unconsciously pulling you closer to his erection with each passing second.
With a smirk, you eased his pants down, revealing the bulge in his underwear. You could see his muscles tense as you took your time, running your fingers along the edge of the fabric before finally tugging them down, freeing him from the confines of his underwear. It bounced upwards, and a low groan escaped his lips as his cock met the cold air.
You leaned in, your lips grazing against the skin of his inner thighs. He looked at you with pupils blown wide with desire as you planted kisses closer and closer to where he wanted you most. You took his member in your hand and began to stroke it slowly, your thumb tracing a circle around the tip before gliding down the shaft. Law’s hips twitched in response, his chest heaving as his fingers flexed in your hair.
Looking up at him with those innocent eyes, you continued your slow strokes, relishing the way his expression contorted with every movement. The teasing strokes seemed to be working well, his body responding with subtle shifts and restrained groans. His grip on the bed sheets tightened, as if he were trying to steady himself, his knuckles turning white from the pressure. You knew you had him right where you wanted him, teetering on the edge of restraint and release.
Finally, you leaned in, your tongue darting out to flick across the head of his cock, licking up the precum that was dripping from it. The taste only made you want more, and as you took him into your mouth, you could feel him shudder in response. Law’s grip on your hair grew firmer, his body stiffening as he let out a sharp breath.
It didn’t take much to send him over the edge. After only one stroke of your warm mouth sliding over his length, he came undone, crying out in the process. Law’s hips bucked, his hand pushing your head down against him as he came, the sudden pressure making you choke and gag, your eyes watering as he rode out his climax. His cum came in hot, thick spurts, each one painting your mouth and throat a milky white, and you had no choice but to swallow it all.
His body trembled with the force of his orgasm, and as he started to calm down, he relaxed his grip on your hair, allowing you to pull off his cock, coughing slightly as you looked up at him with a smirk. He tilted his head down to look at you, chest heaving with each breath. You could see redness creeping up his cheeks as he realized just how quickly he came. You didn’t mind, though. You brought your hand up and swiped the excess cum that was on the corner of your mouth, popping your finger into your mouth to clean it up. You noticed Law’s cock twitch at the sight of you doing that, and with a soft chuckle, you leaned in, muttering to him, “That was nice… let's see if I can make that happen again.”
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aireia · 8 months
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pretty. — shopping for your wedding gown went a little wrong.
tw/cw: tooth rotting fluff, not proofread, fluff/crack, reader wears a dress + satoru calls them his future wife —masterlist
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you smile and place your palms under your chin, wondering how you got to this point. your snowy haired fiancé is currently twirling around with a custom tailored wedding gown… which he wasn’t going to be wearing on your wedding day anyway, because he would never hear the end of it from his first year trio. okay, yuji probably wouldn’t have said anything, but nobara and megumi would bully him out of his own wedding. without a doubt, 100 percent.
your mind tried running through the events that had unfolded over the past two weeks, finally stopping at where everything started.
-
“pretty.” 
those were the only words that satoru gojo had to say the moment the both of you had found the perfect wedding dress for you. detailed right down to the final bits of the dress, it matched you perfectly with your favourite flowers weaved into the design, just the perfect length… it was everything you were looking for.
the sound of your soft laughter brought him out of his awestruck expression. “thank you, but as much as i love it, it feels just a little uncomfortable.” you sounded a little disappointed, and satoru couldn’t help but notice every little shift and movement you made… especially that mischievous look in your eyes and grin plastered on your face the moment you thought of a ‘solution.’ 
“maybe you should be the one in a dress at our wedding. i’m sure the strongest can handle a little bit of discomfort.”  
now, you and gojo had known each other for probably more than a decade. he knew better than anyone else that you were joking. but you were basically challenging him with that last sentence, right? 
he abruptly stood up from the couch he was sitting on once you had gotten to changing out of the wedding gown before marching off to one of the nearby employees and asking about any dresses his size, only to be met with the response of, “this is an unusual request, but there are quite a few dresses that would compliment you-” the employee coughed a few times before continuing, “-but we are closing soon, so there might not be enough time to try them on-” 
“i'll take all of them.”
“pardon?”
“including the one my future wife chose. okay thanks!”
the total came up to about 1.2 million yen. for a dress for you and those 3 gowns the employee picked out, it horrified everyone present at the counter. everyone but him, of course. 
back to present time, that’s how you found yourself being the one and only audience member for your beloved’s fashion show. for a good reason, you wanted to chew him out for spending that recklessly. then again, this is the same guy who decides to buy two of the same items no matter how expensive it is “just in case the other one goes missing.”
you sigh softly before turning your attention back onto him. he’s currently trying on the final dress, and has finally got rid of the sunglasses. you can’t help but admit that he actually looks good in the dress, sparkling with all the right types of gems and jewels, paired with his now visible long eyelashes, he looks pretty. 
“so? how do i look!!?” satoru asks with enthusiasm, spinning around you in circles. 
“hmm, maybe i should be the one wearing your suit that day instead,” you jokingly say to him. he understood, laughing before ruffling your hair. 
“as if i’d let you.” a comfortable silence filled the air afterwards, being broken afterwards by satoru confessing, “i dream of seeing you wearing that in front of me at the altar, you know?”
your eyes at this. you weren’t expecting him to say something like that so sudden. 
“i can wear it at night when-” satoru’s sentence was cut off by a light punch to his gut. 
“hell no.”
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by user @ aireia, do not plagiarize and/or translate.
@rninies still can't write fluff unfortunately, writing this fried my brain
1K notes · View notes
Text
Solace
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Hi guys!
This is a massive one again, it count like 12K words. I proofread it like four time but it's big so it might still have several mistakes. And I'm sorry about it ♥
Please enjoy, I really loved working for this one :)
TW : Mention of cheating, Angst.
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You never thought that your ex-girlfriend would hurt you that way. You were with Jenni for two years when she left Barcelona to go to play in Mexico. You were gutted honestly, even if you never shared the same flat, she was always in yours. Or you were always with her. It was only when you were called in national camp that you weren’t together.
With you being Australian and Jenni being Spanish, it was logical that you weren’t on the same team. Unlike Jenni, you weren’t really a player very needed by your team. More like the number two. Even in Barcelona you are the second goalkeeper behind Cata. And in Australia, there is Mackenzie Arnold, but you can’t be sad or mad at anyone because they just are amazing.
Jenni left after the World Cup and seemed to settle very quickly and easily in her new team and world. You aren’t surprised to be honest; Jenni has always been like this. Easygoing, smiling and very sociable.
You didn’t know that this part of her will lead you to a breakup. Jenni didn’t have the courage to tell herself that she cheated, you learned it like almost all the rest of the world, when pictures started appearing on Internet.
When you talked with Jenni about it, she tried to deny or make things less serious than they were before finally told the truth. She told you that yes, she met someone else, but it isn’t serious, it was just to have fun. It has nothing to do with what you have together.
Blah, blah, blah.
You couldn’t forgive her. It’s not like she just shared a random kiss in a creepy nightclub. They had dates, they kissed and even slept together several times. You didn’t say anything on social media about your breakup or Jenni’s betrayal. You just deleted all your pictures where you were together.
Your teammates took care of you. Marta and Caro brought you breakfast every morning, Lucy brought you back scones from England when she went there, Cata slept every night on your couch just to be with you (you are pretty sure that’s it was because she misses her girlfriend too), Ona shared with you her very impressive DVD’s collection, Alexia always made sure that you aren’t alone for the drill, Jana always sat with you on the bus or plane, Mariona invited you to pass several days in Mallorca in her family and Ingrid took you shopping at least twice a month.
You love them for that, honestly. You couldn’t ask for better friends. But Barcelona keeps remembering you of Jenni. So, when your agent informed you that he received an offer for you from Arsenal, you don’t hesitate a lot.
It was heartbreaking to say goodbye to your teammates and Barcelona’s fans to be honest. You really love this place, but you needed to see something else. Maybe you’ll come back in several years, that’s what you said to a tearful Jana after your speech.
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The first days at Arsenal are strange to be honest, but you are glad to have others Australians teammates here. Caitlin, Steph and Kyra seemed happy to have you there and help you settle down. You are still talking daily to your former teammates, but the trio help you to feel better.
They never talked to you about your breakup, they knew you were with Jenni and that you aren’t anymore. Like the rest of the world after all. You don’t know what Jenni told her friends and family, you liked her brother and her parents, but you couldn’t saw them after that. The breakup is one thing, but dealing with betrayal is something else.
You usually don’t go to the team bonding, but tonight Kyra almost rolled herself at your feet, begging you to come. A little less dramatic, Steph just told you that she will be happy if you come while Caitlin rolled her eyes at Kyra. So here you are, looking at yourself in the mirror of your bedroom.
You look at yourself and wonder what in you wasn’t enough to make Jenni stay. Sur, you were in two different continents, but you never thought a single second about being unfaithful to your girl… ex-girlfriend.
The bell ring when Kyra is here to take you to Leah’s, taking you out of your thoughts. It’s maybe better like this. You can only smile when your friend gives you a big smile.
“I’m so happy you’re coming Y/N honestly. It will be fun, you’ll see.”
“Yeah, I’ll see” you smirk.
She slaps you playfully on your shoulder before starting her car and you promise yourself not to go anywhere with Kyra in her car anymore.
“Yeah, the baby Aussies!” Katie shout when you enter Leah’s house.
Caitlin just smiles at you at first, but soon come to take you away from Kyra when the younger one start to drag you everywhere without your consent.
“Leah ordered pizzas and we are going to watch one film or two. It’s great that you are here, really” Caitlin smiles at you.
You smile back and accept the drink she gives you. You smell it with skepticism when you learn that Beth made them, but after tasting it you have to admit that it’s pretty great. But your teammates are loud, and you aren’t used to this kind of noise anymore. You soon started to feel overwhelmed, and you look for somewhere quieter to sit.
You finally find a place on a couch, where Lia and Alessia are talking casually. Their corporal language tell you that it isn’t an important or secret conversation, but you still approach them shyly, half hiding behind your glass.
“Would you mind if I sit with you?”
“Not at all” Lia smiles at you.
Alessia smiles too and get closer to Lia to let you a bigger place next to her. She has a beautiful smile, you never really realized it before.
“I was just saying to Alessia that she should make a stop in Switzerland next time she goes in Italy. It isn’t far away after all.”
You smile and nod. Of course, you know that Lia comes from Switzerland and Alessia is half Italian, thanks to her dad.
“I never went to Switzerland or even Italy” you admit softly.
It seems to take your interlocutors’ attention and they both start to list the advantages of both countries. But you are interested by it, both girls are calm but still funny and it’s exactly the kind of conversation you needed right now.
When Leah comes in the living room with the pizzas, the team passes almost fifteen minutes to choose a film on Netflix. You are listening to their fight with a soft smile, really amused by it.
“It’s like this every single time” Alessia whispers to you with a smile. “I usually chose this moment to take the best pizza part, even a second if they really are fighting hard.”
You laugh softly, pleasantly surprised by Alessia’s confidences. You haven’t really talked a lot to her, to be honest. But she seems to be a very cute and sweet girl, everyone can see that. You are thankful to her about her small chat so you decide to get along with it.
“Alright, tell me, how do you chose your first part?” you ask Alessia while Katie is explaining why Kim’s choice isn’t good.
“I take the cheesiest one, and if it has the basil leaf on it, it’s the best thing ever. Seems like I have to make a choice for now though.”
You look at her looking attentively at the pizza in front of you. She doesn’t seem to be bothered by the others’ tantrum at all. She finally chooses the cheesy one before turning herself in your direction.
“What about you? How do you choose your first part?”
“I love pizza dough. I usually take the one with the biggest crust” you admit.
“I never heard someone choosing her part like this” Alessia giggles.
Her giggles make you smile, and you lean to take your part too. It happens to be the one with the basil leaf and you put it on Alessia’s part without a second though.
“Ok, you are not allowed to seat next to someone else when pizzas are involved now.”
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“So you feel better now?”
Alexia’s voice resonates in your bathroom from your phone where you putted the speaker while getting ready.
“Yeah I mean the girls had always been lovely but that evening really helped me to be included in the team, I think.”
“That’s great, I’m really happy for you. They would have been stupid not to do it though, you are the most lovely girl ever.”
You smile, you know that she is really happy for you. Since your departure, you kept writing with some of your former teammates and Alexia is one of them. You sometimes suspect that she knows what you whispered into Jana’s ear, when you said that you might come back someday. But you are happy to have news from her.
“What about you? What’s new in Barcelona Femeni?”
“We all miss you, honestly” she begins. “But it’s been great. The new signings are settling great I think.”
“And yourself?”
“I’m fine. Olga has been great too. We, hum, she’s leaving with me now, when she’s in Barcelona.”
“That’s great Capi, I’m happy for you.”
You know how close Alexia is to Jenni, but the blonde never said any words about your ex-girlfriend since your breakup. You are glad about it honestly, but you like when she talks about her relationship. You are really happy for her; she seems so happy lately. And she deserves it.
You aren’t lying to Alexia; you maybe need to thank Kyra for taking you out of your house that night. Since that day you are pretty close from Lia who seems to really want to take you in Switzerland with all the discussions you have about it. You talk a lot to Laia Codina too, the girl seems happy to have someone she can speak Spanish with, you learned the language pretty well during the five years you were in Barcelona. You laugh and joke with Katie and you are of course really close to Caitlin and Steph.
And there is Alessia, too. You like sitting next to her during the trips or the meals, she is pretty calm but, in another hand, she always has something to say or to laugh about. But you feel relaxed next to her, a thing you haven’t really felt since a long time.
It’s scared you a little bit, to be honest. At first you wanted to put some distance between you and her, you don’t want to get attached to someone or feeling the need of having a special someone in your life. But Alessia is so sweet and seems so concerned about your well-being that you can’t stay away from her.
This is the third night out where you go today, it’s at Steph’s house this time. You decided to curl your hair tonight, but still go with your eternal jeans and t-shirt anyway.
You wait someone in your car when you are in front of Steph’s house, not wanting to go inside alone. You just have to wait two minutes before you see Vic coming and you follow her inside after having greeted her.
A lot of your teammates are here, and the atmosphere is a little more festive than the others. You can see that some of them are a little tipsy already and you smirk when you see Kyra’s state. Thanks God, you aren’t the one getting her home tonight.
“What about a have you ever?” someone randomly propose at one point.
You are not a fan of it honestly, but you don’t want to kill the fun. Looking around, you see that almost all of your teammates accepted the game, only Lia rolls her eyes with a little smile. You sit next to Caitlin who greets your presence next to her with a smile and a tap on your back.
The game went pretty well to be honest; you even have fun. Some of girls were more or less asked to explain themselves about specifics questions, making their teammates laugh or smile.
It was until Manu asked a very accurate question.
“Have you ever been a cheater in a relationship?”
There is an abrupt silence in the room, who last probably only two seconds, but for you it’s an eternity. Suddenly, someone rings the bell at the door and Leah almost jump from the couch.
“It’s the pizzas, it’s for me!”
“I’ll help you” you mumble before getting up too, not looking at everyone.
Leah doesn’t react when you talk or follow her to the door, the most far possible from the couch you were sitting on. She refuses your pounds to help her pay but puts some of the box in your hands. When you come back into the room, everyone was in a small talk and you still follow Leah, putting the box on the table this time.
You aren’t really hungry to be honest, but Steph puts a plate with a slice on your knees. You take a look and realize that there is a lot of cheese on it and almost no crust, making you sulk. Then you raise your gaze up to meet Alessia’s and her pizza slice. With a smile you get up and silently swap them.
After the pizzas, you decide to go in Steph’s garden, breathing a little bit of fresh air. You haven’t thought that you will be hearing a conversation between Steph and Manu, your compatriot roasting the goalkeeper.
“What the hell were you thinking?” you hear Steph whisper-shout.
“I don’t know! I thought that not asking Who has ever been cheat on was okay!”
You can perfectly picture Manu talking with her hands and Steph leaning in her direction, deeply frowning.
“I never wanted to hurt her or make her uncomfortable! I’ll go excuse myself to her.”
“You better not. Leave her alone.”
You can hear every single word and it’s maybe even worse. You know very well that Manu never wanted to hurt you, she’s a very sweet girl. But very clumsy sometimes with her words.
“You ok Kiddo?”
Caitlin’s voice makes you jump, but you give her a brave smile anyway.
“Yeah, I mean… Yeah.”
Hands in the pockets of your jeans, you shrug when she raises an eyebrow. That wasn’t the most explicit and understandable sentence. Caitlin comes to stand next to you, looking closely at you.
“You know you can talk to me, right? I mean I wasn’t with you when it happened, but if you need to…”
“I know Cait, thanks” you smile softly. “You weren’t in Barcelona, but you still checked on me. I haven’t forgotten it. But I don’t know if there is a lot to say, to be honest.”
Realizing that you don’t want to talk and not being the one to push the others, Caitlin just passes an arm around your shoulders to give you a hug. It’s comforting to be honest, you never thought that you will say that one day, but you kind of miss your Spanish’s teammates hugs and touch.
“It will get better with time” Caitlin whispers.
You nod and enjoy the hug as long as you can, Caitlin doesn’t seem to want to let you go. It was until you saw Katie’s coming in the garden too. Maybe stupidly, you gently push Caitlin away from you, making the Irish smirks.
“Don’t worry, I can share her with you”
Caitlin smiles and rolls her eyes.
“Mmmmmh. Nah, only for hugs actually” Katie adds, kissing her girlfriend’s head. “But I can share one of my guestrooms with you, if you feel too alone someday. You don’t even have to ask before coming.”
“Thanks” you smile.
Several hours later, you are turning on your mattress in Steph’s living room, unable to fall asleep. Even if your teammates tried to change your ideas, now that you are alone with your thoughts, you have trouble to fall asleep. Some of them went home but a lot of them decided to sleep here.
Your mind won’t shut up and you are getting crazy. The moment when you learned about Jenni cheating turn in your head on and on. The feelings you had, the questions you have since that day.
Why has she done that, why weren’t you enough, has she ever been really in love with you or were you just a hobby to pass time?
Scared to wake some of your teammates up, you finally decided to get up to go to the garden on more time. You miss the Spanish’s heat and shiver when you meet the English’s cold.
You don’t know how many times you stayed here before you feel somebody presence behind you.
“Hi” Alessia says softly.
“Hi” you whisper back without looking at her.
You look at her from the corner of your eyes after several minutes, to see that she’s looking at the sky. Like this, her eyes seem even bluer than they already are. Realizing that you are starring, you hurry to look at something else.
“Couldn’t sleep?” Alessia finally asks.
“No” you mumble, frowning.
Like a lot of people in Arsenal, you don’t have talked with Alessia about the end of your relationship. Or your relationship itself. You never asked Alessia about her love life either, the kind of crush you are developing for her being scary enough for you like this.
“I’m sorry you have to go through this” the blonde finally says. “I never had to deal with things like this, but I can imagine how hard it is.”
“It’s not only about the end of the relationship, but also a lot about the betrayal too. I never thought we will be endgame, but I was really attached to her, and I trusted her with my whole life. This raises so many questions in me…”
Alessia is looking at you, you can feel her eyes on you. But it’s not the kind of invading look, you can almost feel her concern in the way she looks at you.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
You put your eyes on her, but you don’t really need it to understand that there is no push in the proposition. She just wants to help you to sort it out, if you want to.
“I just… don’t understand, I guess. Why has she done that? And why saying that it wasn’t true at first?”
“I can’t answer at her place” Alessia answers with a sad face. “Have you tried to talk to her about it?”
“No. I blocked her everywhere and unfollowed her teammates in case of they wanted to write me on Instagram or something. Our mutual friends are clever enough not to get in the middle of that.”
Alessia nods, seeming lost in her thoughts. She is still looking at you though.
“All I can say is that you deserve someone who will really take care of you. She wasn’t the one, obviously. You deserve the best.”
You shrug, not exactly knowing what to answer to that. You aren’t sure about it to be honest, if you deserve the best why do you have to deal with that kind of things? You probably have done something wrong; you just don’t know what.
“Hey, none of that” Alessia says like she can read your mind, slapping playfully your shoulder.
“I just keep thinking that maybe I deserved it. It makes me doubt about anyone, even my friend. If my girlfriend, the person who is supposed to love the most, thought that I wasn’t interesting enough, how can friends like me? And why? Are they really feeling that I deserve their attention or is it just pity?” you whisper, feeling your tears coming.
“Come here.”
She doesn’t let you the choice before hugging you, in a bones-crushed hug. But you needed it, honestly. Caitlin’s one was good, but this one is really special. Probably because of the girl hugging you. It’s scary and comforting at the same time.
“She’s the one who should question herself, not you. You are kind, you are lovely, you are beautiful, you are funny, you are clever… You have everything. She the one who lost someone great, not you. And I think I’m not only talking for myself when I say that we all love you here. We love you and we care for you, just like your former teammates, aren’t they keep messaging or calling you?”
“Yes, they are” you mumble in Alessia’s shoulder. “Thank you.”
She kisses your cheek, letting her lips press against your cheek a little longer than a usual friend kiss, the sweet girl trying to give you the most comfort possible. It works though, but you are not sure that it’s for the good reason. But once again, you don’t have the strength to get away from her.
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That night, you made yourself the promise not to show any romantics feeling toward Alessia. Because you realized that it’s already too late for you to try to fight those feelings. You know that Alessia is sweet, but so was Jenni before she decided to cheat on you. You are not sure about Alessia sexuality anyway and there is no world where you ask her the question, it would been too strange. You don’t want anything to change between both of you.
The fans started to realize that Alessia had became your “team buddy” like they like to say, just like Jana were when you were still in Barcelona. She usually sits next to you in the bus, you drive her to the training or the home games and you stay at each other house sometimes after training. Some people are joking about Ella and Jana being replaced, making you roll your eyes when Alessia mentioned it. You love Jana, but never thought about her in any way other than friend. Which isn’t the case for Alessia.
You take the habit to cuddle against her when you are watching a movie at home, and you are surprised that she took you herself against her for the next movie during a team bonding. You try your best to erase any surprise on your face, but you catch Leah and Caitlin’s eyes on you, and you can’t hide the blush creeping on your cheeks. Leah doesn’t seem upset or trying to make fun of you, she seems to be thinking. It’s harder to read Caitlin’s look.
When you raise your eyes on Alessia’s face, she’s watching peacefully the film, so you decide to imitate her, ignoring Leah and Caitlin whispers.
“Hey Kiddo, can I talk to you?” Caitlin asks you after a training session.
Almost all of the girls have already left and the ones who stayed aren’t looking or listening to you. You saw that Katie left already and Alessia is still under the shower, her hair routine being incredibly long.
“Sure” you smile at your teammate.
She smiles and sits next to you in your cubby, looking straight into your eyes. Hers are inquisitive and you can’t keep looking at them, even if there is no trace of something negative.
“I just wanted to know how you are feeling, after Steph’s party. I know Katie kind of interrupt, but if there is something bothering you, you can come to me.”
“I know” you smile affectionally at the older girl. “I trust you. It’s just that I don’t even know where to start.”
“What about we start about you and Alessia?” Caitlin asks, raising an eyebrow.
“What do you mean?”
You try to put your best poker face here, but you are not sure it will work. Caitlin knows you since you are 17, from the first time you were called in Australia senior team when their first goalkeeper got injured.
“I myself fell in love with a teammate. Twice. The second wasn’t at all planned but here we are. I know the signs.”
There is a small smile on Caitlin’s face, and you sigh softly. There is almost no one in the locker room now, only Vic talking very fast and very Dutch in her phone. And Caitlin isn’t screaming either, there is no way that Vic can hear both of you. Looking at your feet, you frown before answering.
“You are right, but nothing will happen” you whisper, throat clenched. You shouldn’t be sad like that. “It’s not a good idea to fall for someone so fast after being cheated on and Alessia definitely isn’t sharing those feelings.”
Caitlin offers you an empathic smile, putting her hand on your shoulder. It makes you raise your eyes on her again.
“You can’t control your feelings. Jenni was a bitch to you, but you can’t let her and her mistakes decide of the rest of your life. What she did to you was wrong, it wasn’t deserved in any way. You have to fight for your happiness Kiddo, with Less or someone else.”
You bite your lip softly; you know that Caitlin is right in a way. You can’t let Jenni’s actions guide your life. But there is another problem here.
“I don’t want to take risks and lose Alessia. I really need her in my life right now. Do you… Do you know if she’s really straight?”
“No, I don’t, I’m sorry. We can try to figure out though.”
You really didn’t expect that Caitlin will ask Katie to help you both figuring out. You were thinking that Cait’ would asks Alessia during a private conversation or something like that. Not during a party in a nightclub, and not by Katie suddenly asking out loud
“We need to find you someone Less! The MVP of the game needs to have some fun tonight. Show me what kind of person you like, and I will go to talk to them.”
You almost chock on your drink, making Beth tap you a little harder than needed on your back. Alessia is looking at Katie with wide eyes when you can breathe again.
“Come on! What about him?” the Irish asks, pointing a random man on the crowd (you grimace). “Or him? Or maybe you’re on the good side and into girls too?”
Alessia went bright red and Caitlin smirks at you. You have your answer, but you don’t really like to see Alessia being so uncomfortable. You would have prefer the soft manner.
“Leave her alone, you evil” you say, putting a protective hand on Alessia knee.
Katie chuckles and stands up, taking Caitlin by the hand to drag her on the dance floor after having kissed in apology Alessia on the head. You knew that you wouldn’t see both of them until tomorrow morning.
“Are you okay?” you ask Alessia.
You feel guilty for her discomfort, she always has been nothing but sweet and caring with you. But she smiles at you and squeezes the hand you still have on her knee.
“I am. Don’t worry.”
It’s really hard not to fall in love even harder when she smiles at you like that. You gave her a weak smile back, forcing yourself not to let your eyes fall in her lips when she mixes your fingers together under the table. You are trying so hard that you missed the look Beth and Leah exchanged at the same moment.
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“Come on, please! You can’t miss my birthday!”
Alexia’s pleading voice makes you smile. She’s whining like a little child and to be honest how much she wants you to be her makes you very happy.
“Alright La Reina, I’ll be there.”
The happy scream Alexia let out make you laugh.
“Too bad I wasn’t recording that, it would have made TikTok mad” you smirk.
“Callate. So, you are coming, would you like to sleep at mine?”
“No, I don’t want to disturb you. I’ll ask Jana, don’t worry. You will have already a lot to think about.”
“Nothing actually, Alba and Mama are organizing the party alone. I’m not even allowed to choose my cake.”
You are not surprised. You know how much Alba is willing to help her sister to lose control over things, organizing her birthday is a way to help Alexia cool down. And Eli is definitely the one person needed to control her younger daughter energy in the process.
“What do you want for gift?”
“Nothing, just you coming is enough.”
“Well I have to find enough gift paper to wrap myself in it.”
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“Y/N, you’re coming Saturday, right?”
You raise your eyes on Kyra, standing in front of you. She’s the one organizing the party this weekend and you know how much she’s looking for it. But you won’t be able to make it.
“No Kyra, I’m sorry. I won’t be in London that weekend.”
“What? Where are you going?” she asks, frowning.
You saw behind her Alessia looking at you, just like Leah.
“It’s Alexia’s birthday. She asked me to come, and I said yes. I haven’t seen them for ages, and we don’t have any game or training for two days, so…”
You shrug while Kyra pouts and you give her a smile before pinching her cheek.
“Aw don’t be sad Kyky. I’m sure you will have fun and I’ll take you back some Sangria, okay?”
“Don’t call me Kyky” she whines, slapping your hand away. “And I want Sangria and Iberic ham.”
You smile when she turns your back to you to go to Steph and you finish to put your things in your bag. When you are finished, you sit again just to see that Alessia is looking at you.
“Are you ready?” you ask, and she nods.
Like almost every day, you drive her home with your car. The journey to the parking is silent and you can see from the corner of your eyes that there is a wrinkle between Alessia’s eyebrow.
“Are you okay?” you finally ask after the middle of the trip for her house.
Alessia is usually very talkative, and she hasn’t said a single word, looking by the window of your car, which you find it very worrying.
“Yeah” she just answers.
She gives you a soft smile and starts to look again by the window. You decide not to insist, so you put your eyes on the road in front of you. But not after thirty seconds, you feel Alessia’s hand looking for yours, linking your fingers like she took the habits since several weeks now.
Your heart fluttered every single time.
“Am I still invited to diner?” you ask when you parked your car in front of Alessia’s house.
“Of course you are!”
She’s frowning, seeming offended by your question. But it makes you smile and without thinking about your move, you kiss her hand before getting out of the car. You breath again when Alessia get out too, not mentioning or showing any discomfort about your gesture.
Alessia decided for a pasta night, she promised you to make you try one of her Nona’s receipts. You help her with the vegetables, cutting them for her.
“When are you leaving for Spain?” she asks while stirring the sauce.
“Saturday morning. I take the first flight to be able to enjoy the most of time possible. And I’m coming back on Sunday night, I’ll take the last flight.”
Alessia nods softly, concentrated on her sauce. Well, that’s what you think she’s doing. You don’t know that there is a hurricane in her head at that moment.
“Do you want me to take you to the airport?”
“I’d love to, but it’s really early, Lessi.”
It’s not what seems to retain her attention.
“I like when you call me Lessi. People usually go for Less.”
She looks at you with a smile and you can’t help but smile back. That girl really has the most sweet, cute and amazing smile in the world. How much you want to kiss her right now might not be healthy.
“I’ll drive you. I don’t care if it’s at 4 in the morning.”
She doesn’t seem to let you any opportunity to make her change her mind, so you just accept her proposition.
Alessia proposed you a glass of red wine to drink with the pasta and you accept, curious to see what kind of wine are the Italian one. You only know the Spanish and the French for now. You don’t drink a lot and Alessia neither, during the party with the team you sometimes drink a glass and that’s all.
So, after three glasses and the pasta, you maybe are a little tipsy when you find yourself in the couch with Alessia. She puts a movie on TV, but you are way more focused on the fact to keep your hands in the right places, even if you are cuddling with the blonde. Your skin is on fire where she strokes your arm with her fingertips.
When the effects she has on you are starting to remember you the not really PG18 dreams you sometimes have about her, you stand from the couch to go take a drink in her kitchen. You take advantage of being in the kitchen to splash cold water on your face to cool down like you can.
But when you join Alessia again on the couch, she rolls to be lying with her front totally on your stomach, one of her legs between yours.
“I’m going to miss you this weekend” she mumbles, eyes still on the screen.
“I will miss you too” you answer, playing with her hair.
“No sense. You will find back all of your friends from Barcelona. You won’t even have the time to think about me.”
“Now you’re the one talking no sense” you whisper.
You are not really sure that she heard you at first, because she doesn’t say anything or doesn’t move. But then she’s pushing on her hands to sit down and turn herself to face you.
“Really?”
Her baby blue eyes are scanning you, but you don’t look away. You are like hypnotized by her.
“Of course, Lessi.”
Your hands went naturally on her thighs and you feel your heart beating fast when she leans on you, her forehead finally softly pressed against yours.
“What are you doing?” you whisper.
You don’t know why you are scared. It’s Alessia. You know you can trust her. You never have been able to look at her so closely and you know that you will never see something more beautiful. Her eyes are looking for something in yours when she strokes softly your cheek with her hand.
“I’m going to kiss you”
Even if it’s more of a statement than a question, she waits for the small nod you give her to break the last centimeters separating your lips. The first kiss is just a small press of her lips on yours, but the fireworks in your brain are still here.
Your breath hitch, but then she’s kissing you a second time and you take advantage of having her sitting on your lap to pass a hand on her neck and deepens the kiss. After several time – you lost track of time since long – she whimpers, and you know you have to stop here if you don’t want to lose your mind.
“Lessi” you try to talk when your lips are separated for you to breathe again.
A small hum makes you understand that she heard you, even if she starts to kiss your jaw.
“Lessi, we need to – of fuck.”
She just bites your neck, and you will probably combust in a few seconds. No one kissed you for ages, even when you were still in relationship with Jenni. She was across the world after all. And the one touching you right now is Alessia, the girl you are dreaming off days and nights.
“Alessia, please” you try again, totally breathless. “We need to slow down.”
“But why?”
She’s frowning when she detached her lips from your neck to look at you. Her lips are swollen, her cheeks are pink and what you can see in her eyes make you shudder. You still have to shake you mentally though.
“Because, if we keep things that way, I will probably lose my mind at some point. And you drunk wine, so you are not totally in control. And you have no ideas about the affects you have on me”
“But I want it. I’m very aware of what we are doing” she whispers, stroking your lips with hers. “I waited for it for so long.”
“I don’t want it to be a one-time thing” you whisper back.
It’s maybe not the moment to show some vulnerability, but you have to be honest with her and with yourself. You know that it might take you away from what you are sharing right now, but you probably won’t survive a deception with her.
It seems to touch Alessia though, because she’s sitting a little more to have a better look at you. And then you can see a glimpse of tenderness between the lust and the want.
“Me neither.”
Your heart jump in your chest and after looking at her for a second more, just to be sure that you understood correctly, you take her again against you to kiss her.
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“You’re glowing!”
You roll your eyes at Lucy’s sentence when she great you at Barcelona airport. You hug her bag anyway, before turning to face Ona.
“Don’t make that face, it’s true” the Spaniard smirks.
“Talk for yourself. I never seen you looking so good” you say before turning to Lucy with a smirk. “You, in another hand, you are aging.”
“Piss off” Lucy says, hitting you on the head.
You laugh and pass your hand around her shoulders, assuring her that you are joking. You are happy to be back to be honest, you miss Barcelona. The smell is so different from London, and you feel a wave of nostalgia take you when Lucy drives you in the streets.
You are supposed to sleep to Jana’s for the weekend, but she had a duty that she couldn’t skip, so the golden couple from Barcelona took on them to take you from the airport. You know that a lot of your ex-teammates would come for you if you had ask. You take advantage of the small journey to write to Alessia, letting her know that you have well arrived.
“Jana is maybe not home for now, but she gave us the key for her flat. Do you want to come to ours to wait though?” Ona asks, turning in your direction.
“Nah, don’t worry” you answer, looking up from your phone. “Like this I will be able to take a shower. I will see you both tonight though, right?”
“Of course.”
Jana makes a happy squeak when she sees you sitting on her couch, your clothes changed to support Barcelona’s heath. You laugh at her but hug her back anyway, really happy to see her in real again.
“I missed you so much! Look at you, how are you so white?” she smirks, pinching your cheek.
“Meh, and how are you still so small?”
You have texted with Alessia before Jana’s return, so you are able to talk to the girl non-stop for hours without any interruption. Jana made you diner that you eat with a Sangria, catching up the news that you missed from your phone calls. It’s only at the end of the meal that your friend asks you a question that you weren’t waiting anymore.
“So. Who is making you this happy?”
You are happy to have already finish your dish, because you probably would have chock on your food. You never talked about your feelings for Alessia to anyone, only to Caitlin. You don’t know that you are very obvious for your other teammates.
“What are you talking about?”
“You look very happy. I haven’t seen you so happy for months. So, who it is?”
You look at your friend, not knowing what to say. You haven’t talk with Alessia about the finality of your relationship, you haven’t labelled it either. You don’t know if she will be ok for you to talk about it. After what happened in her apartment that night, you talked with Alessia the morning after. You were relieved to learn that she didn’t change her mind and she still wanted more than a (wonderful) night together.
You haven’t sleep separately since that day, until you have to leave for Barcelona. Alessia took you to the airport like she said, kissing you goodbye.
“Come on, talk to me” Jana add, hitting your feet with hers. “Is it someone I know?”
“I don’t think so” you bite your lip. “Unless you already met Alessia Russo?”
“No way! I thought she was straight!”
You laugh, unable to resist to the surprise and the amazement on Jana’s face. You know that you won’t be able to skip the questions from your friend now and you really hope that Alessia won’t be mad at you about it. You make Jana promise that she won’t say anything to anyone.
You take advantage of Jana taking a shower to call the blonde back in London. You don’t know if she’s already at the team bonding, but after texting her to know if you can call her, she did it herself.
“Hello” says Alessia’s voice and you can’t help but smile.
“Hi Beautiful” you smile softly, happy to hear her. “Am I disturbing you?”
“You never disturbed me before; it won’t start now. I’m waiting for Leah to take me to Kyra’s, my favorite driver failed me.”
Alessia is teasing you, you can say it only with her voice.
“I’ll make it up to you” you promise, still smiling.
“You better. I miss you.”
“I miss you too. Do you have time to talk about something?”
“Of course?”
You try to be as concise as possible, putting the most important point of the conversation in the middle; you talked to Jana about you two. With Alessia not in front of you, you aren’t able to read her facial expressions and it’s worry you. What if it’s too soon? Would it be something that could make her back up?
Without realizing it, you start to talk maybe a little too fast, you are way to anxious for your own good.
“You talked about us to Jana?” Alessia summarizes after your rumbling.
“Yeah” you breath.
“That’s all?”
“Yeah?”
“Why am I feeling that you are waiting for me to be mad at you? Jana is one of your best friend, right?”
“I don’t know, it’s still the early hours of whatever is existing between us, and I don’t want to pressure you or something.”
You can hear that Alessia is confused, but you are yourself confuse about her confusion.
“But I thought that we were on the same page, that we are serious with each other?”
“I am, Lessi. I am very serious about us. So, you aren’t mad?”
“Of course not, you have the right to talk about us to your friends. Don’t torture yourself like this Sweetheart. Look Leah is here since several minutes already, I really have to go. Keep me update about your night?”
“I will. I’m waiting for your messages too” you smile softly, your heart jumping at the cute surname. “I can’t wait to see you again.”
“Me too”
You can hear Alessia’s smile in her voice when she sends you a kiss, wishing you a good night. You feel better now that you heard Alessia’s voice and now that you are sure about what you’ve done.
It’s with a light heart that you enter the bar privatized for the party by the Putellas, to see that a lot of people are already here.
“Here she is!” Cata shouts when she jumps on your back before kissing your cheek with a useless noise.
Then Salma pinches your cheek, Marta ruffles your hair, Mapi jumps excitably next to you and Patri slaps you behind your head. You missed them. You managed to get out of the grip of your former teammates to go see Alexia, who hug you tightly. You smile at Olga behind Alexia’s shoulder, before she releases you to take your face in her hands and looks at you with seriousness.
“You need a tan.”
“Oh, come one” you groan “I live in London, what were you all expected? It’s a miracle that you can’t actually see through my skin.”
Some of your friends around you laugh and Alexia gives you one of her big smiles in return.
“Well, you need to come here this summer in that case.”
“It works for me” you smirk.
Alexia seems happy with your answer and drag you to the bar for you to chose something to drink. You take the opportunity to catch up with a lot of your friends, talking in front of them is definitely better than messaging.
The night went great, you have a lot of fun with all of them. Mapi even managed to drag you on the dance floor at some point for several songs, before you go to get another drink. You find here Ingrid and Frido and start to talk with them, before being find by Jana.
You had a lot of notifications on your phone, your friends posting different stories on Instagram, marking you in the one you are. But you just check Alessia’s messages to be honest.
You were laughing about a story Jana was telling when you spot her. Jennifer Hermoso is here, and you feel all the blood in your face being drained. You never thought that she will be present, no one informed you. You would probably never come if you knew.
When you turn to Jana, she’s looking at you with wide eyes.
“Jana…”
“I didn’t know she would come Y/N, I swear!”
You just have to look at her to know that she’s saying the truth. But Jenni is still here, and you haven’t seen her since your breakup. The breakup who came three months after you saw her for the last time.
“Do you want to leave?”
Jana offers you a way out and you are really tempted to use it. But in another hand, you were having fun, it’s Alexia birthday and you have the right to be here. You wonder if Jenni knows that you are here.
“No, I…”
You start to talk, before remembering that pictures are posted on social media, and you are scared that Alessia sees a picture of Jenni before you inform her that she’s here. But wouldn’t be more suspect if you write her just several seconds after having spotted her?
“Should I tell Lessi?” you whisper to Jana.
She looks at you thoughtfully, but there is soon a blond tornado grabbing you by your arms. Alexia seems terrified when she looks at you.
“Y/N, Jenni is here, I’m sorry. She wanted to surprise me, Alba just mentioned to her the date of the party and she wanted to make a surprise.”
“It’s ok Ale” you assure her, managing to smile at her. “I promised I won’t make a scene.”
“That’s not what scare me, idiota.”
“I’ll ignore and avoid her. The bar is big enough.”
“She’s here with her girlfriend.”
“Still” you say after a beam of silence. “It’s ok Ale, keep enjoying your night ok?”
Her hazel eyes look at you for a small time before she nods slowly. You always find her way to look at people strange but fascinating. Like she can scan your mind and your soul.
“You’ll need to talk to me about your new girlfriend, though. But maybe not now.”
“Maybe not now” you say back, unable to hide your smile.
Alexia leaves after that and you finish your drink to keep your hands busy. The three other girls started to talk again about a random thing that you aren’t able to really follow at first. They don’t seem to realize it, or they just let you the time to adapt to the new situation.
Soon after, you have a great distraction because Alexia’s cake is coming and you can only laugh when you see that it’s decorated with childish Barcelona goodies.
Jenni is tall and it’s hard to miss her in a crowd. You easily spot the girl who is with her and it seems to you that she’s not the one she cheated on you with. But maybe you shouldn’t look at them. Lucy and Ona offer you a good entertainment when they come to you, Lucy grumpily complaining about a waitress trying to hit on Ona. The Spaniard rolls her eyes during Lucy’s explanations, but still sticks against Lucy who passed a possessive arm around her waist.
It makes you miss Alessia.
You were touchy before your first kiss; you always find comfort with her touch.
So, you excuse yourself to go outside to try to call Alessia. You hope that she won’t think that you are too invasive and that thought made you hesitate several seconds when you are outside, your phone’s screen on her ID.
“I was wondering if I will see you in person today.”
You recognize the voice way before raising your eyes on her. Jenni is against the wall of the club, two meters away from you, a cigarette in her hand.
“I wasn’t expecting you to be here” you answer.
She looks at you several seconds before shrugging and putting her cigarette on the trash next to her. You take advantage of that gesture to have a real look at her. She hasn’t changed, but you realize with a big relief that you don’t feel any attraction to her.
“I wanted to surprise Alexia. I didn’t know I will surprise you either. I hope it’s ok that I am here.”
“It’s not my birthday, I don’t have anything to say” you answer honestly.
“If you haven’t blocked me everywhere, I would have told you”
You are surprised by that statement and raise both of your eyebrow while looking at her.
“Do I really need to remember you why I blocked you?”
You have been using a neutral voice until now, but you suddenly find her way to cocky and at ease with her behavior. She seems surprised at her turn by the tone of your voice.
“No” she only answer.
You wanted to call Alessia but if that’s mean that you have to be near Jenni, you rather go inside. But when you turn to go inside, you hear her coming closer to you.
“Wait, can we at least talk?”
You sigh softly before turning in her direction again. It’s weird to be faced with her, to be honest. And you don’t really like it. But maybe you have to pass that moment to get over what happened and the different questions you have about it.
“What do you want to talk about?” you ask, crossing your arms on your chest.
“What happened. I never said that I’m sorry that it finished like that. And I’m sorry that you needed to leave Barcelona after.”
You didn’t expect any excuse, to be honest. You always loved Jenni’s cocky side, her humor and her strength of character. You always have been admirative about the way she stands with her convictions.
“It seems like we weren’t meant to be” you finally answer, shrugging slightly. “But the betrayal was the worst thing ever. That’s what destroyed me, Jenni. I trusted you and you just put two years in the trash like it never meant anything to you. That was hard.”
It’s not usual to see Jenni without knowing what to answer, but for now she’s just standing in front of you with all of her charism, but oh so different from Alessia. They are both tall but except than that, they are in nothing similar. Alessia is the sweetness personified where Jenni is cocky. Alessia has the bluest eyes you have ever seen where Jenni’s are deep brown. Alessia has blond hair, Jenni has brown.
“I’m sorry” Jenni says again.
“Forget it. Where’s your girlfriend? She’s not the one you were dating while we were supposed to still be together, is she?”
Jenni seems uneasy suddenly, dancing on her heels.
“No. I stopped things with her, she kept remembering me how bad I was with you. When we broke up, no one wanted to talk about you to me. I knew like this how much you were hurt and then I learned that you left Barcelona for London.”
You are surprised by that, to be honest. You always thought that Jenni was living her best life with her new girlfriend, completely ignoring the pain she did to you. You were wrong, but you are grateful for you friends and the way they protected you. You stay silence and Jenni takes the opportunity to come closer to you, raising her hand probably in attempt to touch your face.
“Don’t” you say, stepping back a few steps.
“I wanted to see if you thought that we will be able to start to talk again, but I think I can guess the answer already.”
“You knew I would be here” you frown.
Jenni bites her lip and shrugs. She doesn’t have to answer anything, you already know the answer. In fact, you weren’t asking a question, it was more a statement from you.
“You met someone, right?”
“It’s none of your business, Jenni. I’m sorry.”
Not after everything she made you live. Alessia is your treasure, and you don’t want Jenni to smear it. You turn your heels to go back inside. You haven’t call Alessia and you hope that no one saw the encounter you just had with Jenni, at least before you call the blonde.
But when you saw a photograph going inside just before you, you start to panic. Hands shaking, you grab your phone and manage to find a quiet place somewhere to call Alessia.
When she doesn’t answer, you start to really panic. If you look at the picture from another point of view, you are probably over-reacting. People would thought that you are too attached to Alessia and that you are kind of toxic. But they can’t understand how much Alessia means to you.
“Y/N?”
You raise your head to look at Jana, who is looking back at you with worry.
“She doesn’t answer” you mumble.
“Have you talked to Jenni? I saw her coming inside just after you.”
“Yeah. She said that she was sorry or whatever… Will you be mad if I go home now?”
“I’m coming with you.”
Jana seems decided about her decision, but there is no way that you let her make her night awful because of you.
“Don’t be stupid. It’s Alexia’s birthday, you can’t go home now.”
“You, don’t be stupid. Come on.”
She takes your hand and drags you in the crowd, you want to at least say goodbye to Alexia. You find her easily, talking with some of her friends. You don’t have to explain anything to her, she hugs you as tightly as earlier and you hug her back.
“Take care of you, yeah? And warn your girlfriend that she will have to deal with me if she does shit with you.”
“I’ll tell her” you smile softly.
If she answers your calls at one point.
But you don’t say anything to Alexia for now, it’s her birthday. You want her to have a perfect night and to remember this with happiness. You had a great time yourself, until Jenni made her appearance.
During your trip to Jana’s flat, you tried to call Alessia twice, but she still doesn’t answer. You don’t really understand why, because you looked at the stories and posts you were tag in and there is nothing with Jenni and you. There definitively are pictures of Jenni though and you saw several fans becoming crazy, wondering if it means that you are back together.
You thought about calling Leah or Caitlin, but you don’t want to put other people in this mess.
You are the mess anyway, when you arrive in Jana’s, you just lie on the bed in her guestroom, looking at your phone, waiting for it to have Alessia ID appearing on the screen. You don’t understand why she doesn’t answer, even if you are watching a movie during team bonding, she has a phone in her hand.
You have a little bit of hope every time you see your phone light up, but It’s never Alessia. Jana felt asleep since a long time already when you feel your eyes being heavy. But you are scared and you are not able to fall asleep.
You lost hope to hear Alessia’s voice when the screen shine one more time. But this time it’s Alessia’s picture and you jump on your phone to answer.
“Hello?” you say, your heart beating somewhere close to your lips.
“Hi Baby” Alessia whispers. “I’m sorry, I fall asleep while looking at the movie.”
“Oh.”
Finally, you probably were overreacting. But you are relieved and that’s the most important thing for you now. Jana groans next to you before rolling on the bed to hide her face under the pillow, making you roll your eyes. To prevent any fight, you get up to get out of the room.
“Yeah. I’ll never trusted Kyra’s choice ever again.”
“Are you having a good night though?”
“I am. But everyone is asleep or going home now. I usually don’t fall asleep because I’m fighting against it to enjoy the fact that I’m with you, but I have no reason to do it today.”
She’s talking a lot, like always, but you are so glad about that. Her voice helps you to settle your nerves a little, but she easily catches that something is wrong.
“Where are you? It’s quiet around you, I thought that Spanish people were party animal?”
“Oh, they are” you answer, thinking about Jana dead asleep in the room.
“Is everything ok?”
You don’t know what to answer at that, so the next seconds are silent, and it can be stressing for Alessia maybe.
“Y/N?”
“She is here. In Barcelona. She came to Alexia’s party.”
You don’t have to name her, Alessia probably understands who you are talking about just like this. You hear her take a breath and you bite your lip hard.
“I- We talked but there was nothing more than talking, Lessi I swear. And I didn’t want to talk to her at first, but I went outside to call you and she was there all alone. I even didn’t saw her at first, but then she started to talk to me and –“
“Y/N!”
You can hear in Alessia’s voice that it’s not the first time that she tried to get your attention by calling your name. But you suddenly shut up, breathing quickly.
“Can you take a deep breath and please sit on something?”
You don’t ask how she knows that you are walking around Jana’s living room, but you listen to her and sit on the couch.
“I didn’t know she would be here” you mumble shyly.
“I guessed, I know that you would have told me if you knew. Why are you so tensed? What happened?”
What happened? Well almost nothing, now that you have her on the phone speaking to you. How can you tell her that you were stressing for nothing? You don’t want to look crazier than you are to Alessia. Sighting softly, you press your index and your thumb in your eyes.
“Y/N?”
Alessia’s voice is worried now and that the last thing you want her to be. Worried because of you.
“Nothing. It’s just… I got scared that you’ll see pictures of me and her before I talked to you about it.”
“About what?”
“Her being here” you shrug. “Like I told you, I found myself facing her without wanting it. And you know how social media work.”
There is a beam of silence, and you look at your screen to be sure that Alessia is still here.
“What have you talked about?”
“We talked about the breakup; she told me that my friends make a great work for her not being able to talk to me again after it. She said that she’s sorry for hurting me and that she’s not anymore with the girl she cheated on me with” you answer, searching in your mind if you forgot something.
Alessia snorts.
“Why in the world would she break a relationship with you with another woman to stop dating her right after?”
“She said that she remembered her how bad she treated me” you shrug. “And she said she wanted to us to start again.”
“Is it something you want?”
You regret not to have turn this call in a FaceTime earlier, Alessia’s tone is very plate, and it would have been easier to understand her feelings if you were able to have a look at her. You don’t hesitate before answering at that question though.
“No. I’m definitely over her, even if I think I still have repercussions from her behavior. But I’m not interested”
“Good”
You hear a sigh of relief, and you smile softly. Your feelings for Alessia scare you, but you know that you won’t find a more comprehensive and sweeter person in the world. You don’t know if she’s the one (you hope she is) but right now you don’t think that you could ever find someone better than Alessia Is for you.
“Can we switch on video call?” you ask shyly.
Alessia accepted easily and you are happy to see her pretty face again. She’s lying in a bed, on her stomach and everything is dark around her. She show you the room that you recognized like one of Kyra’s spare room.
“Thank you for telling me everything. It might have been hard to face her.”
“It was. But it answered some of the questions I had”
“Which ones?”
You see Alessia tilts her head and can’t help but smile at the cuteness of the girl.
“She doesn’t really explain why she cheated, but I think I understood that it wasn’t really my fault. And I learned that she actually felt bad about it, it’s probably selfish but I was happy to hear that.”
“Cheating is selfish. Wanting to feel better after being cheated on isn’t.”
Alessia’s looking at you with frown eyebrows. You know that she’s mad to Jenni about the cheating, other than that she never really met your ex-girlfriend. You’re not sure that they would get along very well anyway.
“And when she asks me if we could start to talk again and try to touch my face I – “
“I beg you pardon?”
Oh, right. You didn’t mention the almost touching part, but you only forgot. Judging by Alessia’s reaction, it seems pretty important for her. Her face is perfectly neutral, but you can see fire in her eyes.
“She tried to touch you?”
“Well, my face or my hair I don’t know. I didn’t let her though.”
Alessia just snorts in answer. She seems to be disturbed by the gesture more than all the conversation, even if Jenni said that she wanted for you to talk again. You stay silent after that, not really knowing what to add or to say.
“Are you ok? I’m sorry if it’s too much” you finally say after several time.
“Yeah. I just don’t like the idea of someone wanting to touch my- what’s-… Well, you know. You.”
You hum for only answer, looking at the blonde’s soft face. There is a light pink covering her cheeks, but you decide not to tease her about it.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Of course” Alessia answer, trying to hide a yawn.
“Do you think that what we have is like, too much?”
“Too much what?” the blonde asks, tilting her head on the side again.
“I don’t know. Too intense, too fast?”
“No” she smiles. “I’ve waited for weeks before kissing you.”
“Yes but… We kissed for the first time only five days ago and now everything we just talked about is happening?”
“Stop me if I’m wrong but you haven’t only kissed, actually.”
“Alessia.” you answer, blushing at your turn now.
“I think I prefer when you call me Lessi” she smirks before giggling when she sees you rolling your eyes. “No to answer seriously, I don’t think it’s too much. We have our proper history and way to do things, but like every couple in the world.”
You nod softly, putting your feet on the table in front of you. You hate the way that you are not able to be sure about her statement entirely. But you don’t want to say it and take the risk to hurt her, she already has been way too understanding with you since the beginning.
“Hey” she says softly to attract your attention again. “I’m very happy with how we are doing things. And if something will bother me at some point, I’ll talk to you about it, ok?”
“Ok” you mumble back with a soft smile. “I’m sorry to be like this.”
“You don’t have to. Someone broke your trust at some point, it’s normal for you to need reassurances. I knew about it when I started to pass time with you, when we kiss and everything. I knew it was a part of you and if you let me, I will make everything for you to trust me with everything you have. And I will take care of you like you deserve it.”
The amount of love you have for this woman. You don’t know how you could translate it, to be honest. If she was next to you it would have been easier, you only would have kiss her with all the feelings you have for her.
“You’re going to make my heart explode” you can only say, really emotional about her declaration.
“Mmh we don’t want that, do we?”
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You passed the next morning with Jana, Ona, Lucy and Bruna, eating a brunch on the beach. You even went into the water, even if it’s only February. It made Lucy laughs, only until Narla follows you and didn’t want to get out of the water after. Lucy had to go herself to take her out and you were the one laughing.
(Ona threatened you to send her to London if she gets sick because of it, not wanting to deal with an ill Lucy. Which you know are deep lies.)
In the afternoon, you said goodbye to Jana and the others to have quality time with Alexia. You explain to her what happened with Alessia those last days and then what happened with Jenni yesterday. She doesn’t seem surprised but she sights nevertheless. Ale explains to you that Jenni asked her several times to talk to you for her, which Alexia refused every time.
She doesn’t say that Jenni used that birthday like an excuse to be able to talk to you, but you understand it. It doesn’t make sense for you that she might have that idea and still came with her girlfriend. Alexia didn’t had any explanation, so you rather talk about something else. You teased Alexia a little about her relationship with Olga, but she gets her revenge while asking you thousands of questions about you and Alessia.
Ale’ drove you to the airport and you exchanged a hug, promising each other that you won’t let pass so much time until you saw each other again. Seems like it would be in Barcelona, because you weren’t able to convince La Reina to come in England.
You left Barcelona with your heart full of love and your suitcases full of Sangria and ham for Kyra. You slept during the trip, and you are a little lost when you arrived at London. You managed to convince Alessia to go to sleep and only come to see you tomorrow morning with the breakfast, you have training around ten, and you don’t want her to be tired because of you. So, you don’t expect anyone waiting for you.
You are in auto mode while walking to grab a taxi and go home as soon as possible. You can’t wait to take a shower and fall back asleep again. You jump out of your skin when you feel a hand grabbing your arm, even if it was very softly.
“Wha…”
You turn yourself to be facing a smirking Alessia and your mind get blank for several seconds.
“Lessi?”
“Hi” she says before kissing your cheek and hugging you.
You pass your arms around her, still a little in chock. You hadn’t expected her here, you thought that she will be at home, peacefully asleep.
“Weren’t you supposed to be in your bed right now?” you whisper during the hug.
“I just couldn’t wait to see you.”
You smile and hug her even harder. It feels like you haven’t seen her for two weeks, but it was only two days. It shows how much time you are passing together. You breath her sent with pleasure and miss her arms around you as soon as she lets you go.
“Come on, let’s go to my car so I can kiss you properly” she suddenly says, dragging you by your arm.
You laugh when you follow her, but the kisses you received after were worth it. You thought that the period where you were kissing in a car were definitively behind you, but it seems like Alessia has other ideas.
After one hour in her car, you are finally home. You abandoned Alessia the time to go to take a shower but find her in her pajama when you are crawling in your bed. You snuggle up against her, happy to have her with you even if she didn’t listen to you.
“I think that Leah and Caitlin are suspecting something about us” Alessia whispers after some minutes.
“Mh. I might have talked to Caitlin about my feelings for you before something happened” you mumble, blushing slightly.
“Oh. Made sense”
“I don’t know about Leah though” you yawn, burying your face in her neck.
“She’s just very observant I think.”
You hum, letting your body relax against Alessia’s. Your eyes are heavy, but you can see that Alessia seems pretty awake, and you want to have more minutes with her.
“I have a confession to make” Alessia says.
You take your face away of her neck to be able to have a better look at her. She doesn’t have a guilty look on her face but seems more uneasy. You feel your heartbeat getting faster, scared to learn a bad new.
“Okay?” you just answer.
“When I learned that you were going back to Barcelona. I got scared”
You are frowning now, not understanding where she wants to go. You put your head on your hand to look at her, putting your other hand on her stomach. Alessia is laying on her back, but her face is turned in your direction.
“Why?”
“I was scared that you decide to stay in Barcelona. I know you miss your friends from here and the city. That’s what was in my mind when we came back from the training ground and a big party of the night. There were all the signals you were showing me but in another hand I know that you were hurt about your past and I didn’t want to press you about anything. Maybe I don’t know how much you are hurt, but I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable. But then I kept thinking that maybe you wouldn’t come back, and I decided to take my chance.”
“I’m so glad you did” you smile, stroking softly her face. “I would have come back though.”
“Yeah?”
“Uh uh” you whisper before leaning on her and kissing her tenderly. “I miss Barcelona and the girls, but I missed you very much too.”
You feel her smile under your lips, and she passes her arms around you to hug you. You already explained to her your discussions with your friends back in Barcelona in her car, so you are just able to enjoy her presence against you.
It didn’t last long though; you are falling asleep only two minutes after, protected by your lover’s arms. You smile in your sleep when she kisses your head softly. You feel safe, cared and loved, even if these words have not yet been said. It won’t take long though.
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enwoso · 1 month
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i have a request for awfc x teen reader
basically reader is quite a shy and anxious person who hates getting in trouble so they never speak up and always do as they’re told, even if it negatively impacts impacts them in some way e.g. helping clear up at the end of training even if it means they miss their bus home and have to walk. r also doesn’t talk much and therefore hasn’t made any friends on the team as they’re so shy. one of the older players (maybe kim or viv?) notice this and take reader under their wing to try and bring them out of their shell. basically just a very cute fluffy fic
YOUR NOT ALONE — arsenal wfc
i feel like this doesn’t really flow the way i wanted it to so soz if it’s choppy but enjoy!
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masterlist
north london was were you lived, but it wasn’t home. home was in the north, nearly four hours away from london in manchester. that was home.
not london where you didn’t know anyone, where you were all alone at a new team.
and it wasn’t that you disliked north london, the people were actually quite nice and some days it was actually a lot warmer than living in the north. but nothing compared to being home in manchester. where your friends were, your family, your childhood club.
you in some way felt like you had been abandoned, you’d been let to go by man city your childhood club. a club you thought you’d be at until you retired but they didn’t even fight for you when arsenal put the deal in, they let you go as if you meant nothing to the club.
meaning when your first day at arsenal came around, you closed yourself off to everyone. you were already a pretty shy person to begin with but now trying to talk to you was like trying to draw blood out of a stone — impossible.
you kept yourself to yourself, and made sure you stayed out of trouble. helping the coaches tidy up after training even though it meant you missed the last bus that went past your apartment which would mean you would have to do the thirty minute walk back.
you would stay and watch were you could improve your game even though it meant you were pushing your self far too hard and then getting frustrated when you didn’t see the progress you wanted to see.
the team had began to notice your behaviour and had tried their best to involve you in everything possible but you were having none of it.
the most any of the girls had heard you talk was a light hum just acknowledge the person so it didn’t seem like you were being rude.
“we need y/n to be fully apart of the team as i think she feels like she is still and outsider” kim said thinking out loud as they watched you help the coaches pack up for the evening. picking up the coloured cones as you hummed on to whatever the coach was saying. you weren’t much of a talker.
“does she always do that?” leah asked as she looked towards kim and beth who nodded.
“she always offers, just like she always offers to fill everyone’s waters and other little things around the facility’s it’s like she does it just so she can avoid us” beth raised her eyebrows as the three took another glance over to you.
“i’ve tried just talking to her but she not really full of words” kim sighs as leah nods she had tried too along with a few others but nobody could seem to get more than a hum or a small smile out of you.
“she’s just a kid, it’s gotta be hard for her getting let go by her childhood club like she meant nothing and then to be in a place miles from her family, it’s natural that she’s not gonna be comfortable around us” viv butted in after hearing the trio talk about you, a few sympathetic nods being done from the three.
viv had been amongst those who had tried to talk to you, she hadn’t gotten many words from you but instead of asking the usual questions of how you finding london which made you want to scream every single time someone asked you as you had run out of ways to lie and say you were loving it.
instead viv asked about you wanting to know you on a personal level not just on the outside and what would be the obvious to ask.
“like leah cmon imagine how heartbroken you’d be if arsenal let you go after being here for so many years-“ viv pointed out as leah hummed feeling her heart pang a little. her blood was arsenal and she doesn’t think her heart would be able to handle if she was playing for another team.
“okay first of don’t put that in the open, but i can’t even begin to imagine what she’s feeling” a sad smile rushed over leah’s features as viv nodded.
“exactly”
“why don’t you take her under your wing vivvy, she’s said in countless interviews that she looks up to you. so i’m sure if there’s anyone who would be able to crack her shell it would be you-“ beth put the idea into the open, now viv wasn’t opposed to the idea but she also didn’t want to overwhelm you cause that could push you further from the team.
“i’ll try”
the next day had came and gone, viv had been watching you throughout the day trying to pick the best time to chat to you but a good time never seem to come around. viv telling herself tomorrow she would do it
viv had stayed late to chat with the physio about her knee, the rest of the team long gone as training had finished already. well so she thought.
“hey kleintje what you doing here so late? training finished an hour ago?” viv asked as you looked up from your phone, you were watching your few minutes from the last match you played. analysing each pass, each touch, each movement to see what you could work on next.
“missed my bus” you mumbled very quietly viv almost missed what you said. viv nodded to herself as she took a seat next to you on the bench peering over slightly at what you were concentrating so hard on.
“that’s a stupid thing to do” viv blurted out, immediately regretting it when your head snapped up with a puzzled look on your face, a frown flashing across your lips.
“well cause all you doing is focusing on the negatives” viv shrugged as you still held the same look on your face, “like don’t get me wrong it’s helpful but i bet you, you have twice as many negatives in your head than positive things you did in the match” viv continued as you slowly nodded, she wasn’t exactly wrong.
“but how will i know how to get better if i don’t focus on what needs to be improved?” you asked quietly, your phone falling into your lap. viv was a little shocked, not by the question but by the fact that you hadn’t just hummed at her.
“cause you end up focusing on trying to get the bad better that the what was good starts to get bad and you enter a cycle that you can’t get out of” viv explains as you do your signature hum, you weren’t just thinking about football now.
you were thinking about how your life had changed in the past months and how much you had focused on the bad and never gave it a second thought about what was good.
“so your saying i should focus on the positives?” you trailed off staring into the distance in front of you as viv nodded, not that you saw it.
“yeah, your not alone y/n. we’re a team. we’re here to help you” viv pointed out, “and that’s not just with your football skills either” she lightly bumped your shoulder with hers a smile tugged at your lips nodding alone to what viv was telling you.
“thanks viv” you smiled sincerely, you felt as though your eyes had really been opened and you hadn’t have your self a chance at your new chapter, you hadn’t gave london a chance yet.
“no problem kleintje, now come on let’s get you home. it’s getting late”
it had been a few weeks since the conversation between kim, leah, beth and viv and progress had definitely been made. viv had managed to take you under her wing, showing you the ropes introducing you slowly to others so that it didn’t overwhelm you.
you had started to come out your shell more, you didn’t sit by yourself anymore at lunch or on the bus.
instead you’d found yourself sitting steph and kyra for lunch as you discussed your dream holiday of one day going to australia as they gave you recommendations as well as promising that when you do finally go they will happily be your tour guides.
and on the bus during away day you’d found yourself sitting with lotte quite a few times, the way she spoke was similar to viv it was wise words and someone you could listen to for a while as well as lotte being able to sit and listen to you and give you good advice if you truly needed it.
it was game day today, as you walked into the ground with viv. having gotten a ride from viv and beth to save you from having to get the bus. beth had spotted steph and leah in front, running off towards them.
“so do you think london could start to be home?” viv asked, her heart beating a little harder as she asked the question. the topic of london being your home still being very raw.
“it’s becoming home, it’s not quite there yet-“ you paused as some worry came over viv as she began to stutter.
“-but i think it will be home” you finished with a smile as you looked up at viv a sigh of relief coming over her as she swung her arm around your shoulder pulling you in a little tighter for a side hug.
“kleintje you had me worried for a minute but i’m glad your starting to feel more comfortable here, just remember your not alone. we’re a team for a reason” viv nudged you as you nodded taking in every word viv told you as you walked into the stadium.
“got it”
“anyways are you excited about your first start? imagine you score-“ viv said with a hopeful look as you slightly shook your head. you were happy about the start but scoring wasn’t the main focus of today. you were just happy to be getting minutes instead of the scrappy ten final minutes you were used to at the moment.
“excited, nervous? the goal won’t happen though so don’t get you hopes up” you dismissed as viv rolled her eyes playfully opening a door for you to go through.
“gotta have the belief kleintje!”
and maybe somewhere you had some belief cause that’s exactly what happened. you scored your first goal for arsenal, when the ball hit the net you froze. you were expecting for it to go over but when it didn’t you didn’t know what to do.
reality was brought back to you when you were surrounded by your teammates who were lifting you up in a circle as the crowd cheered. a big smile on your face as you looked around spotting vividly on the bench and sending her a knowing look as you tapped the your chest where the arsenal badge was. viv giving you a knowing nod that she understood.
your teammates lifted you down back onto the ground as they all patted you on the back or the head as you soaked up the moment a little longer walking back to your starting position.
“we’re so proud of you, our superstar!”
“get in y/n”
looking around and seeing the fans chanting and having a good time it felt for the first time since you made the big move you felt like you weren’t alone, these people that you were lucky enough to call your teammates and friends were your new family.
and maybe just maybe arsenal and north london was your new home and you weren’t mad at the idea.
in fact you loved the idea.
yourusername
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liked by bethmead and 629,015 others
yourusername forever grateful for my found family❤️🤍
comments
viviannemiedema we love you kleintje!!
leahwilliamson our superstar ⭐️
kyracooneycross yeahhh for our very own 🌟
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fanficsat12am · 2 months
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pairing: Obanai x Reader 
wc: 1.8k
prompt: “You weren’t there…why weren’t you there?”
A/N: This is my first kny work so I'd love to hear from your feedback :>
📜 𝙼𝙰𝚂𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙻𝙸𝚂𝚃!! 📜
It’s hard to think that the face that typically adorned a bright and beautiful smile is now littered with scars and bruises. Tanjiro’s forehead was wrapped with an otherwise white bandage had it not been for the tints of red seeping through the cloth. Despite the gruesome image, his body wasn’t any better. On each arm lay great purple blemishes that peeked over the dressing prepared by Ms. Shinobu. Despite being tended to by multiple Kakushi as well as the residents of the Butterfly Mansion, the metallic scent of blood remained. 
As you watched the boy’s chest rise and fall, you couldn’t help but wish you were there, or another hashira for that matter. Perhaps everything would have turned out differently. The trio wouldn’t have left the battle in such bad conditions, Uzui wouldn’t have lost an eye and a hand, and maybe he wouldn’t have retired from the corps. You were so lost in thought that you didn’t notice the presence by the door, heterochromatic eyes staring at your slumped figure. 
Obanai glared at the unconscious boy, feeling the seed of jealousy continuing to grow in him— the albino serpent slung on his shoulder hissing at the scene in front of him. He never understood why you cared so much for Tanjiro. In his eyes, you were far from the women he had the displeasure of meeting. You were strong, determined, selfless, and many more. Perhaps that’s why Obanai had grown to enjoy being in your presence, unaware of how he’d subconsciously always want to be by your side. So to see that Kamado kid steal you away from him made him loathe the boy with a passion.
He scoffs, alerting you that you were no longer alone, with your eyes darting towards him. “You shouldn’t get all bent out of shape about him. It’s his fault he’s lying in that bed right now.” He crosses his arms, gaze hard as it trails to the bandages on the boy with the Hanafuda earrings.
Your eyebrows crease. “What?”
“He’s weak and impulsive. The kid couldn’t even kill a lower moon demon without a hashira’s help. It’s a surprise he got out of there alive.”
“Iguro-san, I know you’re not too fond of him, but he did his best to help and survive. He and Tengen kill the first upper moons after 100 years. That’s a huge step for the corps and–-”
“They got lucky. Had it not been for Uzui, those demons would have just ended their pitiful lives right then and there. At this rate, he can forget about defeating Kibutsuji and just get it through his brain that his sister’s stuck like that. Maybe tell him to kill her already while you’re at it and save us all the time.”
Your eyes widen, unable to believe the words coming from the Serpent Hashira. You pursed your lips, a mixture of shock, disappointment, and disbelief brewing within you, but mostly that of anger. You were no stranger to Obanai’s sharp tongue, his words venomous like that of a snake’s bite. But to demean the work of those involved in the Entertainment District was beneath him. You huff before turning your gaze back to Tanjiro. He doesn’t miss the glare in your eyes as you scan every injury on his body.
“You weren’t there…” you said through gritted teeth. “Why weren’t you there?” 
He took a sharp breath, masking it with a scoff. “They shouldn't have needed me in the first place.” They were trained demon hunters, not children who had to be looked after every minute of the day. 
You couldn’t help but drop your jaw in disbelief, attention now back on Obanai. Despite his harsh words, he looked unfazed. 
“How can you even say that? They could have died!”
“With lives like ours, death is always around the corner. As a hashira yourself, you should already know this”. 
“But—”
“But nothing. We can’t save everyone, (Y/N). The weak have no place in the corps” he said, leaving no room for debate. Why did you care so much? Those who don’t have what it takes only have so much time before a demon puts them six feet under. Seeing how it’s futile to make you see his side of things, he turns to leave, but what you say next makes him stop in his tracks.
“You know… You hate your family for what they’ve done to you, for treating you as nothing more than a mere tool, just a sacrifice for their benefit. But from what I see, you’re no different…”
He was stunned into silence, the only response being the hiss Kaburamaru sent your way.  The expression on his face got darker before stalking off, making sure to slam the door as he slid it close. Walking through the hallways of the Butterfly Mansion, he couldn’t deny the pain brought about by your words. Perhaps he was a fool to think that the suffocating grip his bloodline held on him would ever disappear. 
***
Guilt gnawed away at you as days passed without Obanai. Despite his harsh words towards the others, you knew you went too far. After that day in the Butterfly Mansion, he had yet to talk to you again, no surprise visits to your abode nor a crow in sight. You finally had enough after enduring his silence for a week. Enough was enough, and you needed to be the bigger person here. 
The two-step plan of privately talking to Obanai and apologizing proved to be harder than expected. It felt like hours had gone by as you continued to knock on his door, calling out his name. You sighed, thinking about trying again another day, had it not been for the underlying feeling within of being watched. Sharply turning your head to its presence, you saw a blur of black and white zipping from the trees.
“Obanai!” you call out, immediately following after him. He whisked through the forest, his serpentine-like running style allowing him to maneuver around each obstacle with immense speed. 
“Please! I just want to talk”. Despite his speed, you were able to catch up to him. Just as he rounds a wisteria tree, he disappears from your sight. Darting your eyes around your surroundings, you see nothing other than miles upon miles of leaves and bark. Only when a low hiss from above you sounds do you find Obanai perched on one of the tree’s long, winding branches. You don’t miss the way his eyes follow your every movement—like that of a predator stalking its prey.
“There’s nothing to talk about. You’ve said all you needed to say. Now leave.” 
Seeing how he was about to leave yet again, you quickly leap up the tree and grab a hold of his haori. Wishing to protect his friend, Kaburamaru bares his fangs on instinct. You draw your hand and try to step back, but instead feel your foot slip off. 
A surprised shriek leaves you as you flail your arms around, trying to grasp at anything. Before you could fall off completely, a strong tug on your uniform wrenches you into a tight embrace. Pulling your face back from his chest, you meet the eyes you had been missing for days. Despite both of your feet now flat on the branch, his hold is still tight—one arm securely wrapped around your waist as one reached from one shoulder to the other. 
You both stay like that for a while, not breaking the comforting silence. Staring down at you, Obanai can’t help but bask at how the wisteria flower’s glow encapsulates your beauty. Despite almost memorizing your features, from the rounds of your cheeks to the crinkles on your eyes when you smile, he can’t help but still be entranced by you every time you look at him. 
He blushes at the realization that he has been holding you for far too long. He turns his head in embarrassment, trying to avoid your gaze, but is stopped by your hand cupping his cheek to face you once more. As your fingers graze over the fabric, the hand once by your shoulders shoots up to grab your wrist. 
“Don’t…I’m hideous,” his gaze falls,  “Just like they were…” 
Your heart squeezes in pain. This was your fault—the words you had thrown just to hurt him had done its job. All those times you had reassured him that he was nothing like his family were crushed by your own doing. You could only hope that you could still mend the pieces that remained.
Despite his dissuasion, you slowly take hold of the bandages once again and pull it down. Had it been anyone else, Obanai would have pushed them off immediately. But with you, it was as if the walls he had built around him crumbled with your gaze alone. The band unravels to show the shameful scars it hid underneath, its jagged lines decorating his face from ear to ear. He’d expected you to look away or even squint in disgust. But no, instead, your eyes held intrigue as the pads of your fingers ran across every bump and crevice of his wounds.  
“I’m-” disgusting,  he’d wanted to say, yet you had cut him off before he could say anything else.
“Beautiful. I’m sorry I let you think otherwise, Iguro-san,” you pause before bringing your gaze back to his own. “I shouldn’t have said what I did when it was further from the truth. Please believe me when I say that you are not hideous in the slightest bit. No one in this lifetime nor the next can convince me otherwise.” 
He tries to look for any signs of you lying—dilating pupils, or even a slight flinch—nothing. You lean forward, staring down at his scarred lips, with Obanai doing the same. Before your lips get close enough, you stop.
“May I?” you ask, taking a deep breath in anticipation.
“If you’d have me” he whispers, finally allowing them to meet in a long-awaited kiss. His lips closed on yours, soft yet engrossing, kind yet strong all at once. He felt rough, a stark contrast to that of yours, which was soft and delicate. They fitted together like two puzzle pieces. Obanai pulled your waist to him, drawing you closer. There was no lust, just two souls finally finding one another. Pulling away, your breaths heaved, both wishing that this moment would never end. 
The silence was cut off by a hiss from Kaburamaru as he tilted his head in awe before slithering his way onto your shoulder and nuzzling himself on your cheek. You giggle as you place a finger on the top of his head to pet it, the snake leaning into your touch. As Obanai watches the scene in front of him, a feeling of hope blossoms within his chest. His past may stain the blood inside him, but he will never let it tarnish the future he could have with you.
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strawberrymochin · 2 months
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A Letter.....Long Lost!
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kyojuro rengoku x fem!reader
word count- 12.2k
synopsis- the discovery of an old letter from kyojuro rengoku's room shakes the world of tanjiro. he thought he fulfilled every wish of rengoku. however he missed one. tanjiro needs to deliver it to the one it was written for; but the letter has nothing written except a name 'y/n'. who is y/n and how will tanjiro find her?
genre/warnings- post war timeline/ mentions of death/ slice of life/ angst/ fluff/ lots of flashbacks/ kamaboko trio going on a quest to find reader/ emotionally unavailable parents/ just read it i swear it wont disappoint/ comfort/ scenes of rengoku and mitsuri training/ mentions of mugen train
a/n- i had this idea in my head and i literally wrote this in two days. Loosely based off a film I'm obsessed with...this is my first time writing a long fic. im hella nervous. it will have a sequel with a reincarnation au and smut. not fully proof read, ignore small errors.
Nezuko chimed in as urokodaki made his appearance. Soon more people will join in. Kanao and aoi are helping in the kitchen, making several dishes while inosuke is trying to get aoi give him some to taste.
Tanjiro and zenitsu are spreading out the mats for people to sit and get comfy.
“urokodaki sensei! Please come and join.” tanjiro said noticing his former teacher, carrying a huge basket wrapped in a cloth with water patterns similar to his haori. Nezuko trails behind him bringing another basket.
“i brought some mitarashi dango and some hanami-zake for everyone.” said urokodaki with a soft voice, that made nezuko wonder if he was smiling under his tengu mask.
It's been 2 years since the war ended. People lost their dear ones with a pain bearing smile. Some endured injuries that would sustain through out their life marking them as ‘crippled’; while some sacrificed themselves for the greater good.
Seasons changed since then.
So did several people.
People who turned their hearts into stone, heavy from guilt of their family dying; who suffered from the culpability of being protected…
“giyuu san’s here too, please sit inside with the others while we get the stuff ready.”
“yeah how's your sister? I brought her some new kimonos”
A mild smile forming on his lips.
Tanjiro’s eyes widened a bit. It's kinda still new to him seeing such a soft side of the guy who barely used to smile.
……have let their guard down, allowing themselves to move on, now that there's no more threat hanging in the air.
People who had been afflicted by the remorseful long sleepless nights of trauma; killing the one who once bore them in her womb; whose eyes had become dull and frantic, dying inside in agony…..
“oi tomioka! Move outta my way!” grumbled sanemi, throwing a box wrapped in a delicate green cloth in tanjiro's direction as he catches it with difficulty. Having a hand crippled like an old man is sure a poor thing, not that tanjiro minds that.
“ahh the scary guy's here again! Don't touch the box tanjiro. It must've been poisoned!!!” shouted zenitsu, panicking around, hiding himself behind tanjiro.
“What did you just say?” Sanemi’s eyes narrowed at zenitsu, veins becoming more prominent, ready to throw a first at the blonde head's face.
“Goddamn shinazugawa! Don't scare the kid…” said giyu, grabbing his wrist and pulling him inside. “Wh-you’re such a creep tomioka!”
“Kk.”
“Stop giving me that kanroji face!” sanemi said as shivers ran down his spine. Somehow a smiling tomioka was scarier than muzan to him.
…have let go of their distraught, accepting the dreams which they wanted for their loved ones. Fulfilling it in their place.
“Both of them are creeps!” Zenitsu said digging his nails into tanjiro's skin as he spit curses on them. “Zenitsu they are gone now, can you please give this box to kanao san, it smells of fresh ohagi.”
“I'm telling you…it's fuckin poisoned”
“It's not, zenitsu…don't be like that” tanjiro pushed him away with the box. He then took up a broom and started sweeping any other leaves that fell down from the trees.
Pink flowers blossomed everywhere, now that another peaceful season had arrived.
Kanao had suggested nezuko and aoi that they should spend time together this hanami festival. Nezuko and aoi agreed to that instantly. Thus this is how they ended up inviting everyone at tanjiro's, whose house was surrounded by a lots of cherry blossoms.
Kiyo chan naho chan and sumi chan were playing with tengen’s baby as Suma kept pestering urokodaki san for loosening his face mask (I can't blame my lil curious mommy). Makio was sure annoyed at her behavior while hinatsuru just chuckled. Murata sat stiff in the presence of four former hashiras.
Almost all of them had arrived. Except the rengokus.
Aoi brought them some appetizers, as they kept on chatting. After decorating the food all of them would join outside admiring the moment of bliss.
“Senjuro Kun and shinjuro san ain't here yet right?” Asked tengen.
“They haven't made their arrival yet” announced aoi, “however tanjiro san is waiting outside for them, the food is almost done, we can start after they get here”
“HAHAHAHA…. RUSHING IN LIKE A BOAR!!!” inosuke dashed in with a sakura onigiri in his mouth, from the kitchen. “WAhahhh scar guy!! Fight me!” As expected from inosuke, nothing could ever stop him. At first he was a bit spooked seeing a lot of people at once and sticked to aoi till his normal composure returned.
“Still that dumb boar head! Will he ever get mature?” Sanemi grumbled lazily. “I agree” said giyu, smiling at sanemi, which almost made his stomach churn. Tengen bursted out in laughter, “I see you are still in spirit huh? Quite flamboyant of you.”
“YEAH THE GOD OF MOUNTAINS INOSUKE SAMA IS ALWAY—” Aoi smacked him on his head and dragged him away while muttering some apologies to the hashiras.
“He's still much of energy…and his voice has become much hoarse ain't it? I still remember taking those kids on that mission. And this kid in particular was such a ruckus.” Said tengen, stretching his arms.
“Isn't it good to see all of us after so long without having to fear losing someone?” Said hinatsuru, makio and Suma smiled at each other.
“But we had already lost many people.” Sanemi sighed. He wished he could apologize to genya. If life ever gives him another chance he would like to be a little less aggressive.
“If you keep sulking like that, your brother will definitely curse you from heaven.” giyu took a gulp of the matcha tea, sanemi sent at tanjiro's a month ago.
“Now that there are no demons, you two get along with each other quite well don't you think so?” Tengen threw the snarky question at them.
“what the—”
“I wish rengoku could have seen you guys like this…remember the one time himejima san told us that oyakata sama wanted to see giyu smile….”
“See me smile?”
“Yeah, what a waste of time i swear.”
“Rengoku disappeared for a while to buy glasses in order to make giyu smile.” laughed tengen.
“It didn't work though and then kochou emotionally blackmail me to make him laugh.”
“Oh so this is why you wanted to have sake daikon with me?” Giyu smiled again at sanemi.
“I swear if you make that kanroji face again at me, I will kick you on your balls.”
“Everyone food’s ready, let's go and sit outside!!” Said nezuko halting the heated nostalgic conversation of the two.
Murata finally lets himself relax a bit as the hashiras start moving out. Urokodaki slammed a hand at his back, as he felt his stiff posture return. “Don't be so stiff we aren't gonna ask you to duel.” murata’s cheeks reddened in embarrassment as urokodaki laughed off at the kid's nervousness.
These days are indeed peaceful.
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Senjuro made his appearance a bit late. He apologized for his fathers absence, blaming on his health. It's not been that best for a few days.
“Oh goodness, is he really going to be fine, we can go run a check up on him you know?” Kanao offered an idea, worried about the shinjuro’s health.
“Thanks a lot. Actually there's something that has been troubling us for a while.”
“Is everything okay?” Tanjiro's asked with concern lacing his eyes. Sanemi noticed, he had always been kind. He was kind to his brother. During hashira training when tanjiro stepped over the line, it actually made sanemi kinda happy and relaxed. Atleast genya had someone in life he could rely on.
Shinjuro's put down his bowl and chopstick on the mats as he brought his hand to his knees.
“There's something we found a month ago….while cleaning aniki’s room.”
Not only tanjiro but tengen, giyu, sanemi, zenitsu and inosuke froze for a second. The untimely death of the young guy was such a sad event that has ached their hearts for a long time.
Tanjiro could smell senjuro’s emotions and it was odd. It wasn't sadness, or guilt, or anger. It was pity. And somehow it stinged tanjiro, the same way it did years ago.
Senjuro took out some bunch of old papers from the sleeves of his yukata.
Tanjiro's throat felt dry and uneasy. It were a bunch of letters.
All of them looked like they were forgotten for months. The letter envelopes had stained yellow and some even have their edges teared off. But it sure emitted a strong smell. The smell of kyojuro rengoku. Tanjiro's still remembers the distinct hints of his aura. And it somehow still lingered around these letters. Especially the one which was sealed.
“What is it?” asked aoi, finally breaking the deafening silence. A strong gust of wind blew the pink petals along with the letters from senjuro's hand. It's scattered around the mats as all of them tried to collect them.
“Y….y/n?” read nezuko aloud. She hold the sealed letter in her hand as tanjiro extended his palm to grab it. It had tear stains. One side of it had brush marks written ‘to y/n’. The ink has now blurred a bit. But it was still readable.
“What's the meaning of all this?” Tengen asked, grabbing one of the opened letters in his hand. Giyu had hold of one reading in pure shock, while sanemi pondered from the side. Eyes as shocked as giyu’s.
“What happened tengen-sama?” asked makio, seeing all of their disturbed expressions. Zenitsu tried to snatch away the papers from inosuke who was trying to eat it.
“We found these letters from aniki’s room. A lady named y/n had sent those letters to him. An—?”
“And that lady was his lover?” asked giyu.
“What nonsense!”
“He never mentioned any of that to me.” frowned tengen.
“Nor did aniki said anything about it at home. At that time our father didn't pay us any attention. He was drowned totally in despair from the death of our mother. Seeing us only infuriated his anger and sorrow. Aniki would train or be at missions and he was rarely at home. He never told me anything about that….”
‘A letter?’ thought tanjiro. He started sweating all of a sudden. He thought he fulfilled all his wishes but—
“Rengoku san! Please think about yourself, can you stop the bleeding with your breathing technique?” Tanjiro has muttered those words back then, panickingly, devastatingly.
He wanted rengoku to say yes. He wanted him to live beside him, fight beside him, eat beside him. But he didn't get that as an answer.
“No, very soon i'll be dead. Before that happens, i need you to hear me out. I have a younger brother named senjuro. Please tell him to follow his heart. And walk down the path he feels is right.” Rengoku’s face had the same content smile, which warmed their hearts up. He continued, “And tell my father to look after himself…and lastly…”
Rengoku went on and expressed his views on nezuko. It felt like a warm hug. Someone has accepted nezuko. Not because they pitied her but since they saw her true potential and that she was no harm to humans. And now when he remembers it clearly, there was something rengoku whispered before his heart stopped pumping.
It was a faint whisper. So subtle that tanjiro thought it was his ears ringing. But now that he recalls, after he said he trusted them as a slayers, he whispered a few words
“and the lette—”
Rengoku stopped mid sentence as tanjiro kept weeping. He wasn't looking at tanjiro but something behind him. It made him smile as he took his last breath.
“Oni-chan? What happened? Are you okay?” Nezuko pulled tanjiro out of his daze. Everyone was looking at him worriedly. Even sanemi was worried.
“I've not fulfilled rengoku san’s last wishes. I- i haven't. I haven't delivered…how can I be so dumb!!”
“What? Tanjiro san! Calm down! You told us everything aniki wanted to say to us.” Senjuro tried to comfort tanjiro.
“No…before dying he whispered something. I thought my ears were ringing but he did whispered something. It was about a letter.” tanjiro kept on babbling as everyone felt dead silent even senjuro couldn't move his hands.
The sealed letter stayed in tanjiro's hands.
Something that belonged to the girl named y/n.
Something probably dear to kyojuro rengoku.
Some words which were waiting since 3 years.
But…..who is y/n?
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The rest of hanami festival gathering went by silent. Senjuro entrusted the letter to tanjiro as per as his request before leaving early since he need to be home before sunset to check upon his father. Murata and urokodaki san accompanied him on the way.
“That's completely ridiculous. None of us have any idea who the fuck this y/n is? how are the fuck are you even planning to find her?” Sanemi spit out bitter words at tanjiro, sitting on the porch, watching the sun slowly turn a deep shade of orange. It reminded him of rengoku’s odd hair colour. It's funny how not only he, but his tsugoku also had weird hair colour— a colour which was dear to Iguro obanai.
Tanjiro lowered his head, smiling a bit. Sanemi changed a lot, even if he speaks harshly, he can only smell pure concern. “But I can't start a new life without paying my debts. Rengoku san saved my life. Whoever lady y/n is….I need to deliver this letter to her.”
“I get what you're saying…but there's no address in any part of the letter. Moreover you are being hesitant on opening it. How do you think you will find her then?” Tengen spoke from the back, alerting the former wind hashira and tanjiro. Both wondered how long he's been eavesdropping them. They expect nothing less. He was a hashira and before that he was a ninja. Even after losing one arm and one eye, he still holds the same power.
“Honestly, I've no idea. But I just can't sit and let it slide.” said tanjiro.
“you’re getting married to kanao next year. Better focus on that. Don't get into useless troubles hanging her off.” sanemi said lazily, yawning and getting up to his feet, stretching a bit. “I will be leaving then. Take care.” Tanjiro didn't reply to him.
Tengen shared a look with sanemi. His eyes shooting a mischievous look filled with pride. Tengen has been in a mission with tanjiro and he knows how stubborn he can be. He knows how pure of a heart he had. And how he even had empathy for demons. He knows sanemi have to surrender infront of him.
Annoyed, sanemi rolled his eyes, “if you're that insistent on finding the girl, then why not refer to kasugai crows. Rengoku's crow might know something about the girl.” He suggested as tengen was in literal awe. He never thought sanemi could ever think logically with his brain. Tanjiro’s head perked up in joy at his idea. Now he finally has a path to look up. Sanemi felt awkward and took his leave, avoiding to look in their eyes.
“Ah! Shinazugawa san! Thanks for the idea!!”
“That brat finally seems to work a bit humane ain't he ?!” A deep laugh bubbled up tengen’s throat.
“I’m happy that he has softened a little now that demons have perished. However, about rengoku san’s kasugai crow, do you know where do I get in contact with it?”
“About that, i would recommend writting letter to kiriya sama. I'm sure he would know.” Tengen patted his head with a reassuring smile.
Soon he took his leave with his wives and giyu, since they were going to an onsen. Basically makio Suma and hinatsuru dragged him along forcefully. Giyu looked a bit tired but he was happy.
Things changed and improved rapidly in a short time. Zenitsu and nezuko got married last year. Murata also got engaged. Tanjiro couldn't help but wonder if the lady named y/n had moved on or not? Will rengoku san be happy if she found someone else? Will he be sad? He looked at nezuko smiling at zenitsu as he played with kiyo, naho and sumi. He looked at inosuke giving his shiniest acorns to aoi. He looked at kanao, smiling delicately, just like shinobu did.
He was happy.
But was the lady named y/n happy in her life?
Kanao looked at him and smiled. She came near him and took his wrinkled hand in hers. “Tanjiro san, you know I would really like you to deliver this letter to y/n san before we start a new life.”
“Even if it takes time?”
“Even if it does. I will wait for you for an eternity.” Tanjiro chuckled as red tints his cheeks. How pure kanao’s heart is? How did he get so lucky to have her in his life? God knows.
“Then I will write a letter to kiriya.”
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After a few days, a letter arrived from ubuyashiki's. Along with that two kasugai crows were found circling over the house. Among them one belonged to tanjiro, when he was a demon slayer— tennoji.
The other was the one who accompanied rengoku till his last breath. Kiriya felt sad for rengoku and wrote his kind regards to tanjiro sending the crow to him. His name was kaname.
The crow looked pretty much normal and wasn't as hot -tempered as tennoji.
This was the first time tanjiro had seen him. “Hello, kaname san. Sorry for summoning you all of a sudden. But I wanted to ask you something…” the crow didn't reply, but tilted his head at tanjiro.
“I-ahh- do you know anything about a lady named y/n?”
The crow remained quite for a while, as if reminiscing the days which followed great sorrow. “Master's…y/n sama…master's lover…letters…”
His words were what tanjiro was expecting. Tanjiro finally saw a path clear.
“Can you tell me where she lives?” Asked tanjiro hopefully.
The crow shaked his head,“i don't know.”
Slightly disappointed, tanjiro started asking how she looked. The crow wasn't exactly able to describe her. Accepting his defeat, he asked the crow where he saw her for the first time. Maybe if he goes there, he will be able to find her.
“tokyo…capital…mission..”
the crow wasn't that helpful, they only got to know two things.
First- whoever this y/n is, she was rengoku's lover.
Second- rengoku's crow saw her in tokyo, the capital.
This indicates maybe rengoku and the people who went to the mission in tokyo as said by the crow, if alive, they might know something about it. Tanjiro wrote updates to the others.
A few days later, giyu’s letter came along with some sweets. In that he wrote that rengoku went to tokyo for a battle with lower moon 2 back then. Oyakata sama had assigned him to that mission, before he was a hashira. There were a bunch of people accompanying him, one of them being kanroji mitsuri.
Oh! Mitsuri kanroji was his tsugoku, tanjiro almost forgot about that, he got excited to ask her when reality struck him down. She died after the war. Even if she knew y/n tanjiro couldn't ask her.
He continued reading the letter from giyu as the path which formed in his mind started getting blurry.
Upon hearing from tanjiro, kanao dropped by at the kamado’s. She said she might have one way to get to know about y/n. Tanjiro's eyes perked up at kanao’s remark, which almost made kanao’s heart jolt since he was so cute.
Kanao explained, when shinobu was alive, she had once told her that mitsuri was close to a kakushi couple. She further said that mitsuri used to write letters to them about her missions on a regular basis. Those two even came to congratulate her when she was promoted to hashira. She said it was nice to see that a girl around her age so lively.
Tanjiro wrote a letter to kiriya again. And next week when tanjiro went out with inosuke to sell some charcoal in the city, a couple came to visit them.
Nezuko welcomed them, while zenitsu narrowed his eyes on them, especially upon the male.
When tanjiro returned home he was delighted to find the kakushi couple still waiting for him. They didn't hide their faces anymore. Dressed normally as regular citizens. Honestly they were pretty young, and tanjiro admired how they served the corps group keeping them intact.
“I'm so glad you both came.” Tanjiro bowed infront of them in gratitude.
“Oh no, that's completely fine. We are happy to be of any help. Oyakata sama said you wanted to know about mitsuri.” said the woman.
“Ahh not exactly about her, but for instance, do you have any idea if she ever mentioned a name called ‘y/n’?” tanjiro said pulling inosuke back beside him as he kept munching on the snacks for the guests. The guy gave him a creeped stare as he focused back on tanjiro's words.
“y/n? No I don't think so….she ever mentioned that name. Did she tanaka san?” The woman said.
Tanjiro felt anxious as the guy named tanaka tilted his head to think a bit.
“Nope I don't think she did.”, he clarified.
“Oh….” Tanjiro's voice was barely a whisper, that even inosuke sat straight checking if he's alright.
“Is there something else we can do, tanjiro kun? You look upset.”
“No no…it's fine. I was just trying to deliver a letter to rengoku san's love—”
“Rengoku san? Kanroji san’s master ain't it?” Tanaka spoke before tanjiro could finish his sentence.
“Yeah.”
“Oh my god? The one whom rengoku san loves was y/n?”
“You guys know her?” Hope shined bright in tanjiro's eyes. So did a fervent fear. Fear of disappointment. Fear of not being able to pay his debts. Fear of not fulfilling rengoku san's last wish.
“We didn't know about her name but kanroji san used to tell us about her…isn't it shimi san?” The guy turned to his wife with a fuzzy smile on his face.
“Yeah, she seemed so happy, wanting to have a love like them.” Said the wife.
And for the first time till now tanjiro wasn't let down. “Really? Did she lived in tokyo? Rengoku san's crow said he saw her for the first time during a mission.”
“A mission? No.” The wife let out a chuckle, “it started way before that. Kanroji san said….. ”
“Ahh! Master! Can we please have a break! I'm tired from hitting the sword, my limbs are sore.” Mitsuri cried barely holding another strike from her master.
“Haha you got tired this fast, we haven't even started.” the blazing hair resembling fire, moved swiftly as the guy attempted another strike on mitsuri, but thanks to a call outside, he stopped midway.
“Wait a bit, I will be back in a while.” Said kyojuro rengoku, her master. ‘i will be happy if you don't come back for a while.’ she thought as she collapsed on her knees, to exhausted to move.
“Ahh senjuro kun! Bring me some snacks please!!!” She shouted hoping for the little kid to hear.
A bit later, rengoku comes back. Senjuro looked at his elder brother, frowning while holding a letter. Mitsuri sat beside senjuro, who brought her some onigiris.
“What's that master?” She asked, stuffing another onigiri in her mouth.
“Even I'm confused. It's a letter but it wasn't delivered by a kasugai crow but by a postman.”
“Huh? Maybe it's from some neighbour wanting to lower your voice while eating.” Senjuro said shrugged off his shoulders as mitsuri suppress her laugh bubbling on her throat, almost choking on rice. It wasn't an irregular thing that neighbors anonymously complained about kyojuro shouting ‘umai’ every time he ate.
“Open it.” Said senjuro, curious what type of sarcastic words they might have chosen now.
Kyojuro did as his little brother requested. However kyojuro didn't reacted after reading the letter.
“Today's practice is over. You can relax.” He, then ordered senjuro to boil him some bathwater, shooing him away.
Senjuro obeyed his brother, while mitsuri felt kinda odd, yet she was happy to have a day off.
As soon as both of them left the backyard, rengoku blushed like crazy. The letter was still in his hand as he tried to digest the words.
“A love lett—” a big palm shut mitsuri’s mouth, preventing her from shouting. Yet she was squealing. “I thought you left! You've gotten quite quick in sly footing didn't ya? I'm impressed.” He finally removed his hand from mitsuri's mouth.
“Ofcourse you made me practice for 23 hours without sleep. Anyways, what's written in that?”
“Do you want me to make you practice for 2 days straight?”
“Naah I'm fine! But master, I'm happy.”
“Okay.”
“And curious too. Please let me read it.”
“No!”
After shooing mitsuri out of the backyard he tucked the letter in his sleeves. This letter was sure weird.
“Rengoku san thought that she didn't read the letter, but she had a strong memory and could remember each word after seeing it once. She was so excited telling us about that.” said the wife, looking outside the window at the moon.
The flame of the lantern flickered a bit. “So that might mean that the letter should be among those papers…”
“Woah zenitsu! I thought you were asleep?!”
“How am I supposed to sleep if you're talking that loudly idiot!”
Yeah the paper. There were a lot of papers. Some were smudged and unreadable, so they didn't read all of them. Tanjiro went over their cupboard and brought the bunch of papers.
“Can you identify the letter among them?” He asked the guy to inspect. The couple looked at each other. “Maybe we can try but the writings aren't clear.”
“Please if you can. I need to deliver that letter.” tanjiro bowed his head down begging to the couple.
“You're a nice kid, Tanjiro kun. We will surely help you.”
It's been more than twenty minutes since they are reading each and every paper. Inosuke got bored and slept on the tatami mats. Nezuko was already asleep so they didn't wanted to bother her.
“Yeah maybe this one. From what Kanroji san had explained, this seems to be the one.” The guy tanaka handed the delicate piece of paper to tanjiro.
“However, in each of these letters, she referred herself as his wife…I didn't know he was married…?”
“Huh?” Tanjiro frowned upon the man's words. ‘what?’ he checked the letters again. And the guy was right, y/n did refer herself as his wife. They didn't read the papers as carefully since they were long, they just assumed she was his lover. But rengoku san wasn't the one to hide such crucial information.
Tanjiro was confused, they were so focused on finding the address of y/n that they ignored reading the letters, which could provide information about her.
Tanjiro spent the entire night reading each word carefully. Fingers running across elegant handwriting and smudged ink. As he kept reading those with a pain in his heart. There were in total 7 of those letters, which were written to rengoku. And the one which tanjiro kept seemingly in care— the sealed one; one which has a strong smell of rengoku’s aura; one with tear stains.
The couple spent the night in their house and left the next morning after breakfast.
This helped but not that much. However the path had become clearer.
He knew that the girl was from a nice family who had hands in education from the curves in each characters of her words.
Second, she had mentioned that he had saved her and her friends from a fire, in yokaichi.
“I'm leaving for yokaichi.” Said tanjiro during breakfast.
“Eh? Oni- chan?”
“Don't worry nezuko, oni-chan will be back soon.”
“I will also go!” Said inosuke, “inosuke-sama will protect kamaboko gonpachiro, his minon from any harm.”
Tanjiro chuckled at how inosuke shows his care for him, “fine then.”
“Zenitsu san you also go with them…”
“Ehh, but nezuko chan won't you be lonely without me? I know you will be lonely without m—”
“I won't. You guys will be back soon. Till then I will be at butterfly mansion.”
“B-but nezuko channn!!!!” Inosuke dragged him away as nezuko watched the poor soul. She felt bad but she wanted him to be with her brother. She just felt that the three of them should go together.
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The three of them finally reached yokaichi town. It was small but quite dense in population. Tanjiro felt that this was an advantage for them since they stories and folks might spread fast in a vast social surroundings.
“Inosuke, zenitsu let's ask the older citizens first, since they might be living here for a while, they must have known about any fire incidents.”
“I was about to say the same thing as you.” Snorted the board masked guy rushing off in the east direction. Zenitsu simply nodded and went in the opposite direction, sulking. He has been giving tanjiro silent treatment since he had to leave nezuko alone.
Tanjiro sighed as he started finding old citizens nearby asking about a fire incident.
After asking a few of them, he sighed, it didn't really do any help, since many weren't able to hear and some weren't able to remember. When he asked the youngsters, they ran away seeing his old crippled hand.
Tanjiro, let down, returned to the spot where they had started searching. Inosuke was already there tapping his feet as he was waiting for the others.
“Did you find anything?” Asked tanjiro.
“Nahh! They were mere cowards. Running way from me. Though I liked it! Everyone should fear the great inosuke sama.” As expected from inosuke, zenitsu was yet to return. Both of them decided to wait till he comes back.
After a while, zenitsu came back. His sulking still hasn't tailed off. “Ahh zenitsu! Did you find anything? You took so long!!”
Zenitsu didn't reply.
He stared at him with dead eyes.
Oh god! Zenitsu’s moody phases are the worst, especially if it's an urgent task. The whining and sulking from a few years ago flashed in front of tanjiro’s eyes.
“You turned mute or what?” said inosuke, already having enough of zenitsu’s tantrums.
But the only reply that came from the blonde was an eye roll. Inosuke got pissed, ready to throw hands at him if not stopped by tanjiro.
“Zenitsu, I will get nezuko chan make sweet washagis for you when we get back home.”
“Really!! You better do that. I can't even explain how much I've missed my dear wife nezuko chan. She must be so lonely without me.” Babbled zenitsu, finally speaking for the first time till they left home.
“She won't.”
“Stop making snarky comments you stupid boar head. What do you even know about pure love between me and nezuko chan?!!!”
“Ahh zenitsu! Did you get to know anything?”
Zenitsu considered tanjiro a while, before giving in, “At the very west of this town, there's an inn. People said it almost burned down about four years ago…I looked for its owner but they said he will be back late.”
Tanjiro let out a breath. If that's the case, then the owner might remember the incident clearly. If only he could provide any useful information.
“Btw do you really believe whoever this y/n is…she's still alive?” Zenitsu scratched the back of his neck, shooing away the mosquitos ready to feed upon his blood. It's been long three of them are waiting in front of the inn for its owner to arrive.
“Let's just not lose hope.” The inn did looked like it suffered severe consequences from whatever happened 4 years ago. Most of it has been repaired but the aura and the smell can still be recognised. There are still some wooden planks with burn marks which are yet to be repaired.
“May I ask who you three are?”
A chilly voice turned their attention. There stood a thin, frail boy, barely an adult. His eyes were small with hair falling down on his brows. He speculated about them with a suspicious look in his eyes(especially on the boat masked guy). Was he the owner? He looked too young for that.
“Ahh good evening! I'm tan—”
“If you're wanting to stay the night, go somewhere else, I'm not opening the inn today.” He replied coldly before tanjiro could even introduce himself.
“Ahh no, you're misunderstanding…. actually we are here to ask you something about the incident four years ago…”
The look on the boy’s face changed from suspicion to disgust.
“Well…I don't wanna talk about it. You guys can leave.”
“No please, at least hear our questions. It's really important.”
“As if I care.”
“Hey fucker! If you don't answer I'll break each and every bone in your body.”
“Stop it inosuke!” This isn't going any better. It's almost night, they also need to find a place to stay.
“tanjiro can you move aside a bit” said zenitsu, without waiting for his reply, he went to the kid. Apparently he whispered something in his ears which seemed to have creeped the guy out.
Tanjiro gulped. He must be desperate to go home and see nezuko. Sometimes he forgets that their coward friend can be hell scary when it comes to nezuko.
“Okay. He's ready to spill anything he knows.” The look on the kids face made it clear he didn't wanted to recall anything about that incident. However tanjiro had no choice but to push him off the edge.
“Hey I'm sorry if we're causing you any trouble, but you know we really need to know anything you know about a girl named y/n.”
“Y/n?”
“Yeah. Heard it before?”
“No. There were none with this name.”
“Eh? Can you try to recall. There must be someone. A girl who was saved by rengoku san. A guy whose hair was similar to fire.”
“Kyojuro rengoku you mean? He pretty much saved everyone. The inn you see here, is small. Before the incident also it was small and not that popular. Only a few people stayed here occasionally. So I can be sure there was no one named y/n.”
An ‘oh’ is just what tanjiro could manage. The boy got inside the house behind the inn. The night fell and they were still in the same position as before.
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Inosuke was throwing tantrums in hunger, so they decided to go to an udon shop nearby. Perhaps they should not lose hope. Thinking empty stomach is not always the best option. This they were sitting in the shop waiting for their order to come.
“But she did mention in those letters that she was saved by him. How come the owner doesn't know anything about that?”
“I already told you we should have broken his bones, monjiro.”
“I think it's useless, let's just go back home to my nezuko chan.”
“Zenitsu! What if you were in place of rengoku san? Would you be happy if your last words don't reach nezuko?” zenitsu went silent at that.
They stayed silent till three bowls of hot udon were placed infront of them. Tanjiro and zenitsu thanked the server for the food whereas inosuke just shoved his head into the hot udon bowl. “You guys seem a bit tense, is everything okay? Asked the old man, the owner of the udon restaurant.
“Yeah we're just a bit disappointed.” Said tanjiro. “Haha and why so? Got rejected by a girl? Can't blame her, it's your hand.” The old man pointed at tanjiro's crippled hand. “What happened that's it's such in a bad condition?”
“Oh! It's…from…from a fight.” Tanjiro smiled, it's hard to offend him anyway,“ i already have a fiance and we are getting married soon.”
“Oh my god! Please forgive my mean words then. I wish you both happiness.”
“Thank you.”
“Then why pull a sad face. My udon tastes the best when you eat it with a good mood, ya know?!”
“Haha, I'm sure it will still taste good. Actually we were here wanting to acquire some information about the fire incident 4 years ago.”
“Oh that was such a bad one. If there wasn't that guy everyone would have lost their life…”
“Rengoku san? You mean?” Tanjiro's eyes perked up. “I see, you know kyojuro. Yeah, that boy was a regular in my shop. Although it's been more than three years since he last visited, i wonder how he's doing? Tell him to visit once, the old man misses him.” the man bursted in laughter while the three of them couldn't even managed to smile even once.
How are they even supposed to tell him, tell him that, “rengoku san died three years ago while saving us from…” zenitsu's voice trailed down into nothingness. So did the old man's. They didn't knew if he's aware about demons so they didn't exaggerated it anymore.
No one spoke for a while.
“I see. What did you guys want to know then? I'm sure you were close to him if he gave up on his life for you all…”
“do you know anyone named y/n? I need to deliver this letter to her.” tanjiro took out the yellow stained letter and handed it to the old man, who squinted his eyes on the writings, drawing a wrinkled finger tracing it's shapes.
“Y…y/n…..yeah she asked me to send some letters to his residence. The kid was young and beautiful.” he returned the letter back to tanjiro.
“She did?!”
“Yeah…that kid almost begged me to not tell kyojuro anything about that.”
The three of them looked at each other. “Can you tell us more about her?” “Do you know where she lives?” “Can I get a refill?” The three of them threw questions at the old man's face, whose lips creaked a bit. “Hmm, I don't know where she lives but I can tell you about her.” He said taking inosuke’s bowl to the counter for another refill.
The restaurant was almost empty so they went and sat on the round seats opposite of the counter.
“It was about four years ago when she appeared in my shop after kyojuro left….”
“umm excuse me…” you said
“Yeah young lady, what would you prefer?” asked the owner pointing at the chart hung on the wall which displayed all the items on the menu.
“I will take a hot tempura udon please.” said the girl beside you.
“And you miss?” The owner directed the question towards you. “Umm I will take anything you prefer.” “Ehh is that so? Fine, I'll make you the tastiest bowl of my special udon.”
“Just tell already…!” The girl beside you whispered into your ear, which was audible to the owner, he chuckled a bit. “Can you shut up….!!”
“I will if you say it…!”
“Okay fine!”
“Umm…if you don't mind, is there any way you can ask the address of the man who just left a while ago?” you asked hesitantly, fiddling with your fingers.
“Kyojuro you mean? I already know his residence, he made me deliver udon to his place before.” the owner said trying to keep his composure, young kids are just so bold nowadays.
“Is that so?” your eyes shined dreamily.
“Why harbored a crush on the man you saw a few mins ago? Hahaha!!” you felt blood rush to your cheeks as you couldn't find words to answer his question.
“She wants to thank him for saving her.” said the girl beside you. “Atsuko!” Atsuko just gave a smirk, ignoring how she threw you in such humiliation.
“Ah…if you don't mind then can you please deliver this letter to him anonymously. Don't tell him I asked you to send it. Please…I can pay you for that..”
“I don't need any payment. I will do that. You can just come and enjoy my special udon sometimes.” the owner accepted the letter from your hands, tucking it in his sleeves. “And maybe watch that man you talked about…he comes here around weekends.” The man hinted you the place which kyojuro normal has his lunch. And if you weren't blushing any harder, you felt your entire face burn with embarrassment. But you want to do it anyway.
Atsuko giggled beside you excited to see what happens next.
“So you delivered the letters in her stead?” asked zenitsu.
“Yeah…she kept coming back with letters for a good six months, if i remember correctly. Maybe kyojuro replied to them…”
It fell silent for a while. The only sound echoing was of inosuke slurping on the noodles.
“So, while you delivered letters rengoku san didn't knew her?” The guy with red eyes pointed the question at the owner.
“No i don't think so, she never came when he used to visit, that is, the weekends.”
“Can you tell us what was the name of her friend again?”
“Atsuko…if I remember correctly..”
“Can you describe how she looked?”
“Ehh? I can't really remember people's faces clearly, but she was very beautiful, big eyes with a nice soft skin. Her hair was long and dark. She had a soft voice. She looked like she belonged from a privileged family. So did her friend.”
“Oh is there anything specific you remember about her?”
“Hmm…let me think…if I'm not wrong rengoku once mentioned her name to a boy who tagged along with him. If you go to him i believe he could provide you some answers.”
“Really? Who was he?”
“His name was….daisuke I guess. He used to wear a similar black sort of uniform like kyojuro.”
After finishing their meal, tanjiro payed for everyone and thanked the old man for all that information. They went to a nearby inn and spent the night.
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Tanjiro wrote some letters updating each one of their current status. And he sent a crow to kiriya requesting him to take a look if there's any former slayer named Daisuke and used to frequent his missions with rengoku.
The next day around afternoon, tennoji returned from ubuyashiki's. He said there was indeed a slayer named Daisuke. He had suffered severe injuries from the war and now lives in his village.
As directed by tennoji, tanjiro's crow, they went to the south east from their current position. After two days and one night of sleeping in the jungle without the fear of demons, a village appeared. It wasn't that populated. After asking a few kids, they showed the path which led to Daisuke’s hut.
“Umm excuse me? Daisuke san?”
“Yes, wh— ta…tanjiro….aren't you tanjiro?” the guy said, he was blind from one eye similar to tanjiro, with a missing arm and a limp leg. Tanjiro felt sorry for him.
“Yes, they are inosuke and zenitsu. Sorry for being a bother….”
“Oh no please come inside. I will get tea for you…” he said excited.
“Oh, you don't have to. It's fine. Actually we wanted to ask something….”
“Yeah? Please come in. I will surely help you as much as possible.”
They entered the hut and sat on the tatami mats. Even after pleading not to bring any snacks, Daisuke brought some rice crackers for them.
“Please have them.”
“You didn't have to.”
“Oh it's nothing. Now what did you wanted to ask about?”
“It's about y/n.” Tanjiro said as the rest simply focused on rice crackers. A hint of familiarity glistened in Daisuke's eyes. “Y/n? You mean the one rengoku san was madly in love with?”
Madly in love with? Tanjiro felt a pinch in his heart. Rengoku san must have adored you. The sealed letter had tear stains. Did rengoku cried while writing that?
“Ah…yeah…I need to deliver this letter to y/n but I don't know where she lives. Did rengoku san ever mentioned where she lived?”
“A letter? Why sent a letter when he was so adamant about that?”
“Adamant?”
“Yeah…he said that the pages limited his words to her. He was so desperate wanting to see her that he spent like 2 weeks searching for her without taking rest after his missions.”
“Seriously? So how are you supposed to recover from those injuries?” Daisuke said to his senior with an exasperated expression.
“It will heal when I get to see her face.” Said rengoku, bandaging the cut from a demon's blood arts whom he just killed.
“You're gonna exhaust yourself from build up fatigue.” The sun rays kissed the soil painted in crimson from the shedded blood.
“I will be fine. You go and take rest.”
“I can't believe you're going to find the creepy girl sending you creepy letters claiming herself as your wife.” Daisuke let you a sigh at rengoku's stubborness.
“In that case I gotta meet my wife.” Rengoku's laughter echoed among the vast field.
It still echoed in Daisuke's memories.
“So rengoku wasn't married…?”
“Naah. Honestly I think, after rengoku san’s mother died, he had faced severe neglect from his father. He was the oldest son of the family, so he had to be strong for his sibling. But sometimes we forget, even the strong needs someone to back for them. Even they need some kind words to let go all their tiredness and have a tight sleep. Even they need someone who assured them that they have a bright future…”
That's right. Tanjiro had seen how shinjuro, rengoku san's father, disrespected his sacrifice. He was so lost and depressed in his wife's loss that he forgot about the ones who need the most care— his kids.
Daisuke continued, “when the letter came from y/n, rengoku san must have read comforting words for the first time since that. He used to reread those letters a thousand times when he was free. Sometimes I wondered if he ever got bored doing that…but I knew he didn't. A starved man will eat anything. And I knew he was emotionally starving.”
Zenitsu and inosuke stopped eating rice crackers. Rengoku's death solely hurted them as much as it did to tanjiro, but they never thought it was that deep. That it was something beyond his life as a demon slayer.
Zenitsu could relate. After all he was an orphan. And rengoku was too, being in a situation similar to him, where his only parent was emotionally unavailable for him. He felt sorry for him.
No one dared to say anything. The silence was piercing their hearts like splinters of iron.
“Fun fact was that he did find her,” Daisuke chorted a bit before continuing, “and he literally begged her to marry him…”
Rengoku searched from cabin to cabin in the steam train. In the last letter you mentioned you were going to aomori to visit your relatives by train.
After a bit of negotiation he learned that there was only one train which was going to stop at aomori. This is how he ended up buying tickets at the last moment getting in the train, to find you.
He hasn't seen you before. He wondered how you would look. Even more beautiful and kind than your letters. Even more beautiful than the slight hooks of the curved kanjis you had written his name. Even more beautiful than the blazing sun.
He had checked almost the entire train. The content smile on his face has now thinned into pursed lips. He was nervous. What if he fails to find you? What if he never gets to find you? What if he never gets to see your face?
What if he didn't recognise you?
He flashed all the passengers in his head before lowering his head. None of them carried the same demeanor your letters did. He couldn't imagine any one of them being you.
He entered the last cabin. It was empty. However this cabin seemed a bit different. It had a narrow passage on the right with doors while the opposite side had small rooms. It seemed private. One previously booked by someone.
Rengoku turned back to return to his cabin when the door beside him shot open.
Inside was a girl, who seemed to have frozen for a while.
“Y/n?”
The girl’s eyes widened at the name which left rengoku's lips. She shut the door close, but it didn't closed, something was blocking it. The girl looked down, realizing rengoku had slipped his feet in to prevent her from doing that.
He barged the door open. “Y/n right?”
The girl remained silent for some time.
“I apologize to you with all my might rengoku san. Please forgive my intrusiveness.” you said, lowering your head, nervous at the sudden appearance of him.
“God you're even more beautiful than I thought…” you shoot your head up only to see him looking with such dreamy eyes at you as if you're the only thing he's ever wanted to look at. And it made your stomach churn. Guilt rushed in each of your veins.
“Rengoku san, i shouldn't have wrote those letters to you.” You say. Your friend had warned you before. You didn't listen.
“Why?” He took a step closer.
You gulped before answering,“i wrote nonsense, pretending to be your wife I'm very sorry yo—”
“Then don't pretend anymore.”
“Huh?”
“Be my wife.” Rengoku suggested. His face now inches away from yours.
“And then she ran away?” Said daisuke, barely containing his laugh.
“Yeah…did I do something wrong?” Rengoku said with visible confusion plastered on his face. It was rare to see any expression other than his smiling face.
“Of course she would run away.”
“and why so?”
“Rengoku san, a girl thinks about her future first after marriage. She knows nothing about you.”
“But she wrote me lett—”
“Which you didn't answered….since you thought you couldn't fit your words in papers.” Rengoku couldn't say anything in his defense. It was true rengoku never replied to any of your letters. When he received the first one he thought someone was pranking him. But then the letters came continuously, one each month. He slowly fell in love with those. He fell in love with your letters. And somehow, he fell in love with you.
“Then what do I do?”
“Be honest, tell her about your salary and your job, tel her you can take care of her needs.”
“Yeah? Kk I'm going then…”
Rengoku stood at the aomori station waiting for you to get on the train for your return. Upon spotting you, he called out for you. The train had a delay and he had a good 1 hour to make things clear.
“Eh? R-rengoku san!”
“I work in demon slayer corps. And currently I'm in the highest rank which is kinoe. I get a decent salary of 42,500 yen. I live with my younger brother and father. My mother died a few years ago from illness. I spend my day training, slaying demons and rereading your letters,” guilt rushed through your veins again. “I promise, I will fulfill all your needs and treat you like my queen.”
“rengoku san...”
“sorry i didn't replied to any of those, I just couldn't express myself much in writing. If possible I would like to crawl into a hole. However you don't need to worry. I will make sure that I keep you happy.”
You frowned at his words, unable to explain him. How could you do that to him?
“Y/n san, let's make the words on the letters true. Let's be husband and wife. I know that I work in an organization that isn't approved by governm—”
“Rengoku san, shall we walk while talking? We are blocking the road.” you change the topic, not wanting to talk about it.
“Sure.”
Rengoku continued telling you everything…everything about him. From his childhood till his mother's death. From his father's neglect, to his way up to kinoe, from his sword to the number of demons he slayed. You didn't believe in demons before, but now that rengoku tells you about this, demon folks is something you want to believe. You wanted to believe in everything he said. Even if he's telling the dumbest thing, far from reality, you wanted to believe it.
“Y/n san! Look here!” You turn back to rengoku.
Click.
“And did she said yes?”
“Maybe. He didn't mention her answer. He was so happy that finally he met her.”
“You must have seen her then…can you tell us how she looked?”
“I think I might have a photo of her. Rengoku san, asked to recieve a photo delivery, since he had a mission from the previous oyakata sama.” Daisuke got up limping to the one of the backrooms of his hut. He returned a few minutes later, handling a black and white photo to tanjiro.
Inosuke and zenitsu peeped from the sides to take a look at the long awaited moment, when they finally get to see y/n.
The photo was black and white, but tanjiro felt it was still colorful to rengoku san. In the photo there was a girl, young, with long beautiful hair, in a loose braid. She wore a flower hair ornament, which must have shone in gold back then. She was just how the udon owner described her, big doe eyes, pretty mouth, she looked educated. She was dressed in a floral patterned kimono. Zenitsu wondered what sort of colour the kimono would have been. He wondered if he could get a similar one for nezuko as a souvenir.
The girl was beautiful. Inosuke thought, she had similar smile to shinobu, he wondered if his mom’s smile was like that.
The girl's reflection reflected in several mirrors behind her, and one of the mirror had caught the reflection of the one clicking the photo— kyojuro rengoku.
“The last I heard from rengoku san, he said she wanted to meet him before taking the mugen train mission. He seemed happy, maybe she agreed eventually to marry him….if only he didn't…” Daisuke didn't finished the sentence, considering his surroundings.
They sit in deafening silence for a bit.
A bit later tanjiro thanked Daisuke for the rice crackers and his help. He asked if it were okay to take the photo with him. Daisuke had no problem with that. After bidding farewell they continued their journey, unsure what to do next.
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After two days of staying at an inn, cluelessly with no idea how to find y/n, inosuke suggests to go to the station from where they got on mugen train.
“If we go to that lord's land and ask the people over there and show this painting of this long haired girl, then some might recognize her.” He had said.
“First of all that's a train station, second it's a photo. How can you still be the same stupid even after 3 years?” zenitsu cringed hard.
“wha—”
“Inosuke’s right zenitsu, we should go there and ask the people over there.” tanjiro said halting the cat and mouse fight which was about to start between the two.
Daisuke had said rengoku was about to meet her before the mission, which means before getting on the mugen train. Even if it is difficult, some locals must have seen even one glance of her.
The next morning, as per inosuke's idea, three of them left for the station.
“Umm excuse me…” said tanjiro, forwarding the photo in front of the local he stopped on his way, “can you tell me if you've seen this girl?”
The man gave a disgusted look at tanjiro. “no I haven't.”
“Ehh? Are you sure you haven—”
“I don't have time for bullshit.” He went off ignoring tanjiro. Strange. People here are less friendly, some even get irritated if stopped on their way.
It's almost lunch time, zenitsu and inosuke had tried to stop the locals as tanjiro asked them about you. It was clear that this ain't ending soon. Especially when they've got nothing good in hand.
“Let's go buy something to eat.”
“YEAH! I'M HECK HUNGRY!!”
“I saw a kid wearing glasses, selling bentos…let's buy some then…she went in that direction.”
Upon seeing the kid, tanjiro asked her to give them three boxes of bentos. It seemed similar to the ones they had three years ago. The girl was about to leave after receiving her payment, but tanjiro's instinct told him to stop her.
“Wait!” The girl turned back to him as zenitsu and inosuke watched him, confused. Tanjiro put his hand inside the sleeves of yukata, taking out the only photo they had of you.
“Have you ever seen this girl around here?”
The girl squinted her eyes behind the round glass frames,“y/n san! Isn't she y/n san…”
Zenitsu’s eyes popped out, he wondered if tanjiro's a mind reader or something, how can he be so quick?
“Yes! You know her? Can you tell us where she lives?” Tanjiro asked desperately.
“She never mentioned that to us…” the girl said frowning her eyebrows.
“Oh…how did you know her then?”
“Well, a demon slayer who saved us three years ago, requested…”
You waited for kyojuro to come. The sun shone brightly above you. The empty roadway started getting crowdy. You've had enough.
“Y/n san. You wanted to see me?” kyojuro had become a hashira now, and amongst his tight schedule he barely had time for you. It's not like you were disappointed, but still…you and kyojuro often talked through phone booths, after you've suggested that casually one day while strolling with him. Last week when he called you, after what felt like years, you said you wanted to meet him soon. ‘fine meet me at the near hinakawa station, I will be waiting.’ he'd said.
Though it was you, waiting for him to come. You've felt distant from him. And you didn't like it.
“I ran away.” You announced looking in his honey drizzled eyes. Though you aren't sure if it were your overthinking but those eyes seemed a bit dull today.
Kyojuro didn't say anything, maybe confused how to interpret your words.
“my family's against us. And I'm against them. I left the old relations to form a new one. With whom I love. Let's get married.” You said taking his hand in yours.
Kyojuro said nothing but wrapped you in his arms. You hugged him tighter, never wanting to let go. “I'm not alone anymore.” He said before nuzzling his face on the crook of your neck.
Yes. You've always wanted to hear these words from his lips. You've wanted to let him know that he's not alone even when he thinks he is. You wanted him to know that there's someone who will always support him even if he's father thinks he has no talent. This was the reason you wrote him letters in first place. This was the reason you let yourself get tangled in a world far different from yours— in the world of kyojuro rengoku.
He left soon saying he will be back after completing a mission. He said he will send someone to you and asked you to wait for him till then. And you agreed gladly. About half an hour later a girl wearing round steel rimmed glasses along with her grandmother appeared.
“Y/n?” You nodded your head at them. “Rengoku sama asked us to keep you safe till he gets back. If you don't mind then you can come home with us.”
You got to know from the grandmother, how the rengokus had saved their lives two times. You've never seen kyojuro fight, but you knew he was hella strong. Still your heart sinks into your stomach whenever he mentions a mission. You've never encountered demons, once you didn't even believed in them, and now here you are nodding at each of those demon tales of the grandmother.
It didn't mattered anyway as long as he comes back safe. You have to wait for a while for him to comeback….after all you weren't done….you still had an important thing to say.
“Then?”
“Then days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, the slayer never made its return. She left eventually, thanking us. We told her to wait for a while more…but she was too stubborn.” said the girl, fixing her specks again.
Tanjiro couldn't believe what he heard. Rengoku had so many things going on in his life. He had more priorities than him and his friends. Someone who was more important. Someone who left her entire family for him.
Yet.
And yet.
He chose to save them sacrificing himself.
He wondered if the you hate him now.
Zenitsu and inosuke were too stunned to speak. All of them were on the verge of crying. To think…that he couldn't return because of them. To think that they played a role in ruining you happiness. That he died saving them.
“She said she was going to asakusa at her friend’s house, named atsuko.”
Tanjiro bowed at the girl, he couldn't manage thanking her, since he knew if he draws one more breath trying to talk, he would break down right there.
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The three of them took a train to asakusa after eating those bentos. They looked similar because rengoku had bought the same boxes from that bento girl 3 years ago.
Inosuke was oddly quiet inside the train. The other two also barely chatted before reaching their destination.
Tanjiro had visited asakusa before and he didn't liked that experience very much. Especially the narrow lanes. This time the city looked more developed than before. And it was more crowdy too. They made their way as the girl has previously informed, that atsuko works as a teacher in a big school for aristocrats.
Coincidentally, tanjiro found the same vendor from his last visit. Back then nezuko wasn't able to savor his ramens since she was a demon. He wished he brought her along. They ordered a steaming bowl of ramen, as the vendor was delighted seeing tanjiro again.
“Where that bamboo girl you carried along with you?”
“She's at home right now.”
“Don't give my wife stupid Nicknames.” ,shouted the blonde at the vendor. Tanjiro apologized in his stead as he kept fuming. “So why are you three here all of a sudden? It's been long ain't it?”
“Yeah we're looking for a girl named y/n. She has a friend who teaches in a big school named atsuko.”
“Y/n never heard that sort of peculiar name…”
“are there any big schools in this area, where aristocrats study?”
“Umm…there are a lot of big schools, you could go and ask at the library. There's only one library here and all the school students or teachers borrow books from there. They must know something about that.”
“Oh really! Thankyou very much.”
Without any further do, the three of them went to the public library after eating.
“Woah this is so big.” Tanjiro said.
“It has so many books shall I borrow some for nezuko chan” zenitsu got lost in his dream world. Inosuke was quite whenever he gets in a new environment with a lots of people, so tanjiro didn't bother checking at him.
However, inosuke tugged on tanjiro's yukata pointing at something with his boar mask tugged on his head. Tanjiro could see his eyes popping out.
“What happened tanji—” zenitsu choked on his spit. Tanjiro’s jaw dropped, his mouth open wide. Inosuke was pointing at a picture hung on the wall. Tanjiro took out the photo hurriedly from his sleeves.
There's no mistake. This was indeed the same girl. Underneath the painting was written ‘princess akiko’ in bold letters carved carefully on metal.
“But isn't her name y/n?” Said zenitsu. What's going on? Before tanjiro could say anything, a woman in her twenties bumped into them while rushing.
The photo slipped out from tanjiro’s fingers.
“I'm so sorr—” the women's words halted as she looked at the photo lying on the ground in front of her. She picked it up before tanjiro could.
“Where did you get this picture from?” She asked as if it were a taboo to have this.
“Ahh you know y/n?”
“Y/n?”
“She looks similar to the girl in that painting” the boy with the boar mask declared.
“For the hundredth time inosuke it's a photo.” said zenitsu.
“She doesn't looks like her. She is her. She is princess akiko. The youngest daughter of the imperial family.”
What?
Three of them couldn't believe their ears. “But her name is y/n…” whispered tanjiro in a low voice.
“Just who are you?” She looked at the picture carefully, as if hiding it from the world, “isn't this rengoku?”
“You know rengoku san?”
“That's the man who saved us from a fire incident in an old town. And then became the main reason of the storms in akiko’s life.”
Tanjiro's eyes widened at the mention of the fire incident “Are you atsuko?”
The women nodded, surprised they know her name. Tanjiro, then explained the whole matter.
“I see.”
“This isn't right akiko…you shouldn't have continued writing letters to him in first place.” Atsuko said trying to persuade her not to run away.
“I can't. I can't live here. They will never accept him. And I can't live without him.”
“Akiko, try to understand…rengoku loves y/n.”
“And i am y/n!” The sound of the rain pouring down increased.
“You are princess akiko. Y/n is just a fake name, you created to hide your real identity when decided to write him letters. I supported you then since i thought it was a one time thing.” Atsuko shook the girl's shoulders trying to bring her to the path she considered right.
“But I don't wanna be akiko. I wanna be y/n…y/n rengoku.” Tears fell from the eyes in front of her as sobs escaped her lips.
“You're playing with rengoku’s feelings. Even if you run away, how do you intend to tell him the truth? You can't pretend to be y/n your entire life akiko.”
The girl didn't answered atsuko. That day slowly came to an end along with the rain. And Akiko did run away to rengoku, away from her pointless life, being a puppet in her family's hands.
“She returned a month after she ran away. When I asked him about rengoku she said nothing. Soon her brother came and took her away.” Whispered atsuko in a voice so doleful, that it was clear, it hurted.
“Did rengoku san knew she was a princess?” Zenitsu asked.
“He probably didn't. Akiko's family arranged several politicians later to set her up but she caused such a ruckus that her family gave up at last.”
“Do you know where she is now…i need to deliver this letter to her.” Each word tasted like bile to him. He couldn't even imagine how miserable it had been. You literally rejected a crystal palace only to live a normal life with him. Which didn't even come true. How feverishly would it have hurt? How apathetic fate was…
“She lives in osaka, running an orphanage. You would find her there. Shall I get someone two drive you three over there?”
“That will be very thoughtful of you” said tanjiro.
Atsuko arranged a driver, who would drive them to the orphanage, they expect to find you in. The car ride was even more silent than the train one. Inosuke, even, didn't make any fuss seeing a car for the first time.
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‘So this is where princess akiko lives.’ thought tanjiro. The building was similar to butterfly mansion, nothing that luxurious but quite spacious. The driver left soon after dropping them.
They crossed several corridors of children buzzing like bees. Laughter echoed among the hallways. How wonderful of a place for someone who lost their parents. Similar to them. They wondered if they would have grown up in this orphanage if they were born here.
Finally they reached to what seemed like an office. Similar to one shinobu used when researching herbs, the one which kanao uses now. They entered with a knock.
“Y/n san?”
Your head perked up at the name, which once your beloved used to refer. That beloved who never came.
Your heart ached a bit expecting kyojuro. A melancholic smile forms on your face seeing three kids infront of you. Of Course it wasn't him.
“yes?” you said gently, trying not to give in to your emotions.
But tanjiro could smell it. He smelled the intense grief bubbling within you. He could imagine how long you've bottled up your emotions.
Without saying much, he took the letter out of his sleeve placing it on your desk.
“It's been waiting for 3 years.”
“Huh?”
“Rengoku san wanted me to deliver this to you. Sorry this took so long.” your hands froze at his name. Your chest heaved without even you realizing as you grab the letter.
A single drop of tear fell on the spot which had been previously stained with tears. Tears of kyojuro rengoku.
Your fingers shaked tracing your name on the letter. The name which he used to call. Y/n not Akiko.
You teared the seal, taking out a paper. It was filled with words. Words, he never thought he could express on paper.
Dear y/n,
If you're reading this, then I'm sorry. I might have broken my promise of protecting you forever because by the time you read it— I will be dead.
Y/n i wanted to tell you, that I've loved you. I have loved you from the very beginning. Before even I saw you. You were the one who protected the flame in my heart. While others told me to set it ablaze, you made me learn how to keep the flame burning.
You were as beautiful to me as the rising sun. So bright, so clear. You were the epitome of my life. I wanted to live a peaceful life with you, in which my father let's go of his depression. In which your family accepts us. In which we don't have to hide from others. I wanted you to have my surname.
Your words were like the first rain of summer to me. You saved me from quenching my thirst by your words. I have been starved…. starved for so long that I forgot what being hungry for love feels like. Until you came into my life. you healed my heart, handled it as if it's porcelain.
I thought papers were something I would never choose to express myself with. But look at me now. Haha. I don't know why I'm writing it now, but I just feel like, the time’s soon going to be over. And I feel like I will be gone without seeing your face.
Please don't hate me for that.
If I get to spend my life with you I will probably burn this off, but if this letter somehow unfortunately finds you…I want you to know, I gave my best. I gave my very best to save the ones surrounding me. That I fullfilled my duty till the end. So don't feel sad.
I still can't believe you chose to love me. If possible I would like to meet you in another birth, in another universe without demons, where I will be yours, completely yours. You're the best thing that happened to me, y/n. You're just perfect.
But I must say….you’re dumb for choosing a man who bets his life for others, leaving the silver spoon you had in your mouth.
Sadly, our time was limited in this birth. Good bye princess akiko.
~ your kyojuro
The letter fell from your hands. Your lips quivering as you barely contained your tears, which stained the letter.
You just managed a smile at the kids who brought you this letter. He was no more. And you couldn't believe that. He knew you were Akiko not y/n. The truth you weren't able to tell him.
“I'm sorry for making this long. Rengoku san died saving us from a demon, 3 years ago” said tanjiro, tears staining his cheeks. So do the others, barely containing their emotions.
“oh! But i-im glad you all are safe. H-he fulfilled his duties right?”
“Does it hurts?” Tanjiro asked.
“A lot.” And if he wasn't seeing things, he saw rengoku for one second with a silly smile on his face, maybe wondering how to comfort you.
The second he blinked his eyes he was gone. What remained was his letter. Tanjiro handed the photo to you before leaving. He wondered if in another birth he gets to see the both of you reconcile.
He took a deep breath wanting to return to kanao. Maybe he would just ask her to marry him this year. He doesn't want to waste anymore time away from her.
“Where were you?” Asked zenitsu to inosuke, who went missing for a while. They are currently waiting for a train to go back home.
“To buy this.” Inosuke showed a butterfly hair pin decorated with blue crystals. It was beautiful.
“Woah. Who did you buy it for?”
“Aoi.” Tanjiro chuckled at his bluntness, while zenitsu smirked. It's funny how inosuke still gets both of their names incorrect but he never made a mistake in saying aoi’s name correctly. Who knows they might have two weddings…
Now that tanjiro had finally payed off the debt, he wished you happiness as he looked forward to a happier future. He will remember you, not as princess akiko, but as y/n.
“Let's go! I can't wait to see nezuko!!”
“Zenitsu watch out your way!!”
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hotnbloodied · 3 months
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(I have a idea that you could write, how about a yandere childhood crush x F friend/admirer. They been friends for years but F reader thought that yandere childhood friend didn’t like her since he would date other people and would be a player alway telling her how other girl are so pretty, so she grow tired of this one-sides love went on a date with a other guy who like her, but while she on the date yandere childhood crush show up ruined it for her and takes her to his house where he had lay it out how he would try to make her jealous and how he never did anything with them and never kiss any one of them because he want his first kiss and his first everything with her. And she let it happen because all this time she though she was only one that felt that way about him and but she had no idea how possessive he can be)
Sure! I'll do my best, enjoy~ -˚ʚ♡ɞ˚HB˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
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Yan!Player!Childhood Friend X F!Reader
!Warning! This post contains yandere themes and topics that may be uncomfortable to people who are sensitive to the topic, read at your own discretion.
CW: not proof read, female reader, sloppy writing, yandere tendencies, miscommunication, misunderstanding, jealousy, shoujo-esk drama, possessive tendencies, reader being pushed around physically. (LMK if I'm missing anything.)
!!READ AT YOUR OWN DISCRETION!! MINORS DNI!!
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“How many years has it been?” You look across the table to one of your best friends since childhood, she was the only other person aside from yourself that knows about your little crush on Luka, your other childhood friend. “Ten years… give or take,” you responded in a reserved tone, grip on your drink tightening slightly. She sighed and looked at you hopelessly, “I don’t know why you still hold on to your crush. You should just tell him and move from there, either on or forward.” The three of you had a great friendship together originally, from elementary to middle school the three of you would go to one of your houses after school and do homework then play games after. You had and still have the biggest crush on Luka, and thought for sure that someday you and him would get married when you were younger. You lost count of the amount of times you and Veronica giggled with each other about the details of the wedding back then. Then high school came around. Luka was the first of the trio to start dating. You’ll never forget the fateful day, you and Veronica were waiting for him to open the door since you all were hanging out at his house that day. He opened the door like usual and all went to his room, only, there was a girl there. He introduced her as his girlfriend and you could feel a crushing pressure in your chest. Veronica covered for you by being the one to do all the talk but sneaking occasional glances at you with worry streaking her eyes.
The rest of that hangout was very awkward for you but you did your best to put on a strong front. Luka’s girlfriend had to leave early, so at some point it was just the three of you again. But he wouldn’t stop talking about her, “she’s so pretty isn’t she, she confessed to me the other day and I was surprised that such a cute girl would confess to me.” You wanted to cry, you could feel your eyes getting hot and threatening tears so you excused yourself to the bathroom.
From that day onward you gave any and every excuse as to why you could not have regular study sessions with your friends anymore. Though, Veronica was the only one you allowed into your house to check up on you since you couldn’t even face Luka anymore. It was a week later that Veronica told you that Luka and his girlfriend broke up. You felt horrible that you felt relieved, but merely three days later you witnessed him hugging another girl. His arms around her waist as hers were around his neck, giggling with each other. You remember that that was the last of any hope you had of  him ever having mutual feelings for you fizzling out. But still, these feelings of yours persisted. With the cards you were dealt you just had to suck it up, and masking it eventually got easier. Slowly you were talking to Luka again, making jokes, laughing. Even if he was with someone else, you still really liked talking to him.
You recall those old high school memories, the longest he was in a relationship for was a month. You remember how each of his girlfriends seemed prettier than the last, plus he sure didn’t make you forget it. Now that your little group was in college, Veronica and you were the only ones that still hung out with each other regularly. Like right now at this café. “Listen,” she says, breaking you out of your daze, “I think you’re a pretty girl too, you should try  a hand at dating yourself. Not everything has to revolve around Luka right?” She said as gently as she could and she was right, now that you were in college your life and needs had to come first after all, “what were you thinking?” She smiled, “my boyfriend has this friend, actually, he’s asked about you before, I’ve met him a couple of times and he seems like a nice guy, sociable and sensible. Maybe you and I could go on a double date?”
A week later you found yourself in the park with Veronica, her boyfriend and his friend. There was a little summer event going on, there were food stands, activities and music. The friend was honestly was a very nice guy and attentive as well. At one point Veronica and her boyfriend went off for their alone time and you found him and yourself sitting on a bench enjoying the food that the two of you got from a stand. You made jokes with one another and you don’t remember having such a good time with someone new like this, a moment of solace where you weren't thinking about Luka. The moment lasted shorter than you thought though when you heard someone call out your name. You and your date turned and saw Luka briskly walking over with a beautiful girl trying to keep up behind him. “Luka?” you asked out loud. “I didn’t know you were going to be here today [y/n], who’s this?” He asked as your date stood and reached out his hand, “I’m [name], I’m [y/n’s] date.” You blushed at your date's words, you thought they were sweet. The sweet words were also short lived though when you felt someone yank at your wrist. That someone being Luka, leaving both his and your date behind.
Your soft spot for Luka made it so you didn’t try yanking your arm back immediately, but it didn’t stop you from asking questions, “Luka? What’s going on?” He didn’t answer, he led you all the way to where his car was parked and pushed you inside. He’s never been aggressive with you before so admittedly you were a bit startled. He entered the drivers side and started up the car before driving away. Your phone was blowing up and when you checked to see who it was, you saw it was Veronica. You only managed to message back that you were with Luka before he took your phone and tossed it to the back seat. “What the hell Luka?!” You yelled, but still he didn’t respond. You eventually recognized the street, it was the road to Luka’s apartment. After parking, he yet again dragged you from the car, all the way to his apartment.
Thrown on to his bed, you were going to stand up and give him a piece of your mind. Before doing so though he had caged you under him, he had your lower body pressed down so you were trapped there. “What are you–” “I thought you weren’t interested in dating,” Luka finally talked but the first words out of his mouth were rude enough to make you flustered. “Excuse me? I’m literally the same as everyone else, why wouldn’t I be interested in dating?” Your defense was up, it felt like he was trying to hurt your feelings. “All this time I brought up my relationships but you didn’t react at all,” his face was stoic with a slight hint of hurt. Boy did that offend you, “what the hell? You’re really pissing me off Luka. What is this all about?” You were extremely close to punching that stupid beautiful face of his but his response left you breathless, “I love you.” All the squirming and defiance you had was suddenly extinguished like a bucket of water on a flame. “You… love, me?” He looks at you, his gaze softened, “I’ve loved you since I was young.” Your heart raced but with infatuation came the anger as well as more flailing, “what the fuck! How could you say that when you literally started dating around ever since entering high school!” “I never did anything with any of those girls! The most we ever did was hold hands! All I’ve ever wanted was you!” “Oh fuck you! I never took you as a liar!” “It’s not! I swear, it’s not.” You stopped thrashing, partially because you wanted to hear him out but also because you were tired.
“I thought that if I kept going out with people you would get jealous and eventually confront me about it. But you never seemed to care, in fact you never even seemed interested in romance, so when I saw you with that guy, I lost it.” You knew you should be angry, but you found yourself a little bit happy, “you’re a real dummy you know that?” “Can I kiss you?” Not hearing a peep from you for a beat Luka leaned down and you two shared a tender kiss. You got startled a little when you heard Luka moan out your name and reached to restrain your arms over your head while deepening the kiss. When it breaks, he’s the first to say something, “after all those years of imagining what this would be like, you’re sweeter than any fantasy. You agree to be mine now, right? Our feelings are mutual, right? You returned my kiss so it has to be, I love you, no one will ever take you away from me,” his words might be sweet but the delivery was a bit frantic, not that you noticed. “Y-yes,” you finally replied, “I love you too.” Luka was delirious, this was finally happening after all these years. He knew you loved him like he loved you. Maybe the plan of making you jealous didn’t work but that didn’t matter now since you were in his grasp. He doesn’t need to just sneak pictures of you now, he doesn’t need to rummage through your trash anymore and he doesn’t need to break into your room to watch you sleep anymore. You’re finally, his. But old habits will die hard.
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citrinae · 4 months
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mornings with them.
contents; fluff, suggestive themes. warming up with some bite-sized headcanons. hope you guys enjoy <3
ft. the monster trio
here for part 2
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⋆ ˚。༄ luffy
if he’s up before you are, that’s only because of the growling sound coming from his stomach. cross-legged on the bed with a lost look in his eyes, “imma get something to eat.” he’s definitely forgotten about the piles of snacks he keeps in his locker and that he makes sure to restock after each meal with your crewmates. 
i can see him being a cuddly type. really likes to hug you from behind. in bed, while you're standing up, while you're brushing your teeth. if you happen to be the one to wake up first, fetch him some food from the kitchen and you will earn yourself a good series of hugs from your boyfriend. if not, that's ok, because luffy is a biter too, and he will not hold back from digging his teeth into your shoulder to convince you to go to the kitchen with him. this may or may not lead to the two of you enjoying some other type of meal. 
the thing is that luffy, the moment he wakes up, won't stand staying in for too long. especially if you're on land he'll want to explore the surroundings and will try to make you join him on the adventure. knowing how much of a menace he can be objectively speaking you may have no other choice but tag along, but trust me, nothing will make him happier than getting to spend the first hours of the day with his partner in crime <3 
“that was so cool,” he's saying to you as your backs are glued to the wall of a random building, chests heaving. out of the corner of your eye, you can see a group of marines searching aimlessly for your missing shadows. luffy takes you by the hand, “we showed ‘em good.” 
⋆ ˚。༄ zoro
you wake up first. but you’re never getting out of bed before he would, and that’s in most cases due to the fact that the arms resting around you are too heavy to lift on your own. you tried slipping away once or twice, but he always managed to keep you there. not like you mind it one bit, nestling yourself at your boyfriend’s chest filling you with a strange sense of warmth you wouldn't let go that easily. 
“easy, tiger. what’s the rush?” his voice is sleepy with a guttural undertone to it. “staying in for a minute longer won’t set the ship on fire or anything. proven.” zoro will try to make you two stay in bed with him for as long as possible. you don’t even get a chance to convince him otherwise as he’s quick to fall back into his snooze, and you are usually soon to follow. the second time you open your eyes it’s because of the voices and steps coming from the hallway telling you that you might’ve overslept.
he also likes it when you lazily climb on top of him, resting your cheek on his chest, enjoying each other's presence in silence. in the morning, he may not be the best converser. but there are times his hand may roll down your back, taking a good squeeze of your butt with a smirk plastered on his face, and that's when you know you will definitely be late to your chores. 
if you’re on land, he might make it a habit to carry you on his back for a morning jog, the sun unfurling behind your forms as hours roll past. if you’re more the athletic type like he is, he’d gladly have you running by his side. either way, i think starting his daily training with you would work like the perfect energiser for him. although he would never admit it out loud. 
⋆ ˚。༄ sanji
i find sanji to be quite the early bird, having to set up breakfast for the entire crew and doing some first-hour arrangements in the kitchen and all that, so he wakes up before you do. almost every time. he’s already done with more than half of his chores by the time you open your eyes. when it comes to you, however, breakfast in bed is one of the many tell-tale signs of special treatment, and more often than not you get to wake up to the smell of coffee or favourite tea and a well-thought mix of sweet treats. 
corny is this man’s second language. if you’re on land, expect to see some tiny bouquets of flowers on the tray, either bought or picked from around the ship, everything looking just so dainty and perfect “like you are, my love.” one of them finds its way behind your ear with a sweet peck on your lips. 
and not rarely does he join you with his own cup of tea. leg to leg, your head leaning against his shoulder. a hundred percent the type to smoke in bed. he likes to take a few moments of tenderness with you, gently kissing your shoulder and neck and talking about your plans for the day. sanji will intently listen to you talk about any weird dreams you had, but if you tell him he wasn’t present in any of them he’ll most certainly become a pouting mess. 
he gets handsy quickly 💀 and your thighs are perhaps his favourite spot to feel beneath the sheets. the longer you let him he’s one step closer to skipping cleaning up the kitchen after breakfast. but the moment often shatters with some thuds at the door accompanied by luffy’s voice, all broken and teary, begging sanji to unlock the fridge. 
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florencemtrash · 3 months
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The Shadowsinger & The Inkbird: Chapter Twenty-Five
Summary: Y/n's clairvoyance is a gift from the Mother, but it feels more like a curse. With the power to gain knowledge through touch alone, Y/n holes herself up in The Alcove and hopes her powers and parentage will remain a secret. But things will change after the Summer Solstice ball and a chance encounter with a certain Shadowsinger.
Warnings: Physical injury (i.e., Rhys and Cassian recovering post-Koschei), fluff, mating ceremonyyyyyyyyy (y'all I'm so excited I got so emotional writing this one)
The Shadowsinger & The Inkbird: Masterlist
Masterlist of Masterlists
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It was strange how the absence of things could be so obvious. How silence could be more obnoxious than a crowded room. 
Three weeks had passed since Koschei’s death, and everyone was afraid to bring attention to the glaring absence of Cassian’s arm and Rhysand’s wings. 
At every meal, Nesta carefully cut up the Lord of Bloodshed’s food, and every night, Rhysand winnowed up to his bedroom. He no longer needed a wheelchair to move around, but walking up the stairs was a battle he won only half the time.
Azriel’s shadows were still missing. Gone to the wind. But their whispers grew in strength each day and Azriel would strain his ear to hear them. It gave you both hope that they’d return in time. 
“Daddy.” 
Rhysand froze halfway up the stairs, leaning against the wall with his legs crossed at the ankles. He subtly hid his hand behind his back, concealing the cane he relied on to walk around his own home. 
“Yes, Nyx.” 
The boy stood with his mother, her hand resting gently on his shoulder. Her wings were on full display, as were Nyx’s, in preparation for their daily flying lessons. For the first time, Rhysand would be unable to join them.
“We’re going flying. Do you… do you want to watch?” Nyx smiled shyly, one arm wrapped around his mother’s leg as he stared at the ground. “I can finally summon my wings during free fall. Just like we practiced.”
Rhysand strained to smile. “Go ahead with your mother. I’ll join you on the balcony soon.” 
“Ok,” the boy murmured and walked down the hall towards his parents’ bedroom. 
Feyre moved to be with her husband, her wings disappearing in a melting of light. She gently cupped his face in her hands. 
“It’s ok, my love,” Rhysand whispered, kissing her palms. Feyre smoothed back the swoop of hair that fell over his forehead. The strands were damp with sweat. “I don’t want you to keep Nyx waiting.” 
“Nyx is a patient boy. More patient than his father.” 
Rhys chuckled, blinking away tears. It was silly to hide these emotions from Feyre — she felt everything he did — but he wanted to at least try to be strong. To be her equal. Her High Lord. 
“Take your time, Rhys.” Her lips brushed against his and a piece of that ache in his chest fizzled out. It was incredible how his mate and wife could ease his burden with such a small touch. “I’ll be waiting with our son.” 
The moment Feyre disappeared into their bedroom and shut the door, Rhysand snapped his cane in half. Wood splinters flew out, embedding themselves in the wall and in the staircase, and he threw what remained down the stairs. 
Feyre, with all her love and patience, gave him the space to be angry. To grieve. But it helped her to know that Cassian, Azriel, and Emerie were already on their way. 
Rhysand made it to the third floor landing without his cane before the pain in his back became impossible to ignore. He sank to the floor. 
“Rhys—” The trio crowded around him. 
“Don’t say a fucking word, Cass.” They froze beside him, tucking their wings in tight. “I used to think the steps to the House of Wind were hard. Now I can’t even climb the stairs in my own fucking house.”
He hated this. He hated this with a burning passion. He was meant to be High Lord. He should have been at Feyre’s side, shaking out his wings and getting ready to taste the wind with his son. Instead here he was, sweat-soaked and shaking in front of his brothers and Emerie. 
After his mother and Selene’s death, he’d promised himself he would never lose his wings. They were a physical reminder of his Illyrian heritage. A heritage which so often went unseen beneath the veneer of a High Lord. Decades spent Under the Mountain had only cemented that promise in blood and salt. 
Amarantha may have stolen many things from him, but she’d never taken his wings. She’d never touched them. She’d never even seen them. 
Poison-laced calls of Amarantha’s whore and half-breed had always paled in comparison to the freedom of flying. A freedom he no longer had. 
“I’m not an Illyrian anymore,” Rhysand whispered grimly. The muscles in his back rolled, and even that small movement sent a thread of pain down his spine.  
Cassian and Azriel were stunned into silence. But not Emerie. Her gaze was too piercing, her tone too frank and unrelenting as she said, “My mother died without her wings.” 
Rhysand looked up at the female, slender and sharp as a blade. 
“At thirty-seven years old her father took a butcher’s knife and hacked them off before burying them in the snow just outside Windhaven.” She cocked her head to the side. “Tell me, was she not an Illyrian then?” 
“That’s not what I meant,” Rhysand said pathetically. 
“It’s exactly what you meant. But you’re wrong. Your wings don’t make you an Illyrian, Rhys. If they did, myself and over half the females in those camps would have been banished from Illyria a long time ago.” 
There was a silence that followed, tense and filled with guilt until Emerie spoke again. 
“Do you know what they say about you in the camps? And I’m not talking about the males who whisper half-breed behind your back.” 
Rhysand took his head. 
“The young females whisper about the day you’ll find them worthy enough to steal away to Velaris — to your precious city you’d never let come to harm. They talk about the shops they’d get to see with the frosted cakes in the windows and the enchanted houses where they wouldn’t have to slave away over a stove or wring towels until their hands bled. That one day, you’ll recognize that they’re dreamers too who’ve only had their worst nightmares come true. The older ones are wiser than that. They don’t talk about escaping to a city they don’t know and don’t love, surrounded by strangers who might call them lesser-fae. They build their lives in the cold, and when the males come to burn it down, they either endure and build it up again, or they fight back however they can.” 
Emerie regarded him carefully, eyes halting on his violet eyes and the sharpness of his ears. 
“Wings don’t make you an Illyrian,” she repeated, “It’s in your blood. It’s what you're born into and the hands that raise you. Never say “I’m not an Illyrian” again, do you understand me?”
Rhysand swallowed the burning lump in his throat. Touched the short tips of his ears and wiped the tears gathering in his violet eyes. 
“Azriel, could you—could you bring me my cane? Please?” 
His brother walked down the steps without hesitation and retrieved the broken halves. 
It was a thing of beauty and strength, carved from ironwood and stained so dark it may as well have been sliced from a night sky. Rhysand put the two pieces together and closed his eyes. 
It was easy, miniscule magic to put the cane back together and far more difficult a feat to stand upright once again. He might have toppled backwards if not for Emerie. She gave him her shoulder to lean against.
“Still an Illyrian,” he murmured. 
It was a promise to himself and to his family. To the three Illyrian warriors who had found him. 
“Still an Illyrian.” Emerie patted his arm. “I understand you’ll still feel some self-pity for a while. It’s natural, but… try not to do it in a room I’m in.” 
“I can do that.” Rhysand leaned against his cane, limping towards his bedroom where his mate and son were waiting. “Oh and Emerie.” She turned her head towards him. “Thank you.” 
“Do you want me to just cut it for you?” 
“No, I like the way Nesta does it.” 
“Since when did you get so picky?” 
“Since I lost my fucking arm, Mor.” 
You snorted into your glass of wine and Azriel smiled as the pair continued bickering. He kept one hand under the table, rubbing small circles into your thigh. It wasn’t until Nesta decided to grace the early morning with her presence that Cassian turned his attention away from Mor, drawing Nesta down for a kiss. 
A fresh bruise painted his cheekbone purple, pink, and blue. 
Nesta gripped Cassian’s chin, turning his face to the side for a better look. “Who did this?”
“Emerie,” he said cheerfully. His grin was brighter than the sun. 
Today was the first time he’d sparred with anyone since he lost his arm and Emerie hadn’t gone easy on him. On the contrary, she’d taken every advantage her two arms afforded her until Cassian felt more tender than a steak on a butcher’s board. He hadn’t been thrown on his back so many times since the mating frenzy. 
It was a dirty, cunning way of fighting and he’d never appreciated the Illyrian female more. 
Nesta smirked at her friend with a glint in her eye that looked suspiciously like gratitude. 
Emerie only shrugged. She hadn’t experienced the same kind of loss that Cassian and Rhysand had, but she’d learned a great deal after her wing clipping. Carrying limbs that no longer worked was not so different from losing them entirely. It was all about a shifting of control and weight — about finding a new center of gravity and using weakness to your advantage. 
“Did you go easy on him?” Nesta asked. 
Emerie snorted. “Obviously not.”
“She fractured three ribs, but they’re healed now.” 
“Very nice.” 
Nesta settled down at her rightful seat beside Cassian and wordlessly cut up his breakfast. 
“Thanks, Nes.” 
“It’s the least I could do.” 
Cassian chuckled and pulled her close until she was nearly in his lap. “Don’t give me so much power, darling.” 
She huffed. “What power?”
“The power to win any argument in the future.” He stuck what remained of his right arm into the air and gave it a shake. It was a gentle, teasing reminder of who had cut it off in the first place. 
Nesta narrowed her eyes until they were two clips of ice. “Don’t make me regret letting you live.” 
“That’s much better.” 
Some people needed a gentle touch after horrible events, but there was nothing gentle about Cassian. He’d been born with the wild in his blood. He knew how to adapt and survive, and if surviving meant he would lose his arm and get more time with his mate, it was a trade he was more than happy to make.
Azriel seemed to be in agreement. He never took his eyes off you. More interested in seeing your reaction than hearing which comment had brought it to life.
Feyre nudged Rhys, eyes wide and eyebrows raised as she looked back and forth from her mate to you and Azriel. 
Now? Rhys asked. 
Yes, now! They’ve been staring at each other for the last thirty minutes. It’s honestly unnerving... Do you think they’ve already accepted the bond?
There’s no way in hell. We would have known. 
Azriel’s terribly good at keeping secrets. 
The fact that they haven’t been missing the last few months is proof enough. 
All the more reason to bring this up now so we can finally put them out of their misery. 
Feyre shot to her feet at the head of the table and Rhysand scrambled to attention after  her. 
“It has come to our attention that we never did say congratulations to a special couple in this room.”
“Oh gods,” Azriel muttered. 
Your face turned warm as everyone’s eyes and grins fell upon you and your mate.
“You didn’t think we forgot about your mating bond, did you?” Gwyn teased. 
“We were kind of hoping you had,” you said. “Not that we aren’t happy or—” You glanced over at Azriel. 
The first night you’d woken up in the Dawn Court you’d tried to crawl into his bones — an odd mixture of desperation and longing urging you to have your way with one other. Now, you were embarrassed to think that the first thing you’d tried to do after nearly dying, was sleep with your mate. 
Azriel smiled, bending towards you like a flower seeking sunlight in silent encouragement. It was such a small, natural gesture, and one that everyone noticed. Which also meant they clocked the blush on your cheeks as you gripped Azriel’s hand under the table. 
You cleared your throat. “We weren’t sure it was a good time with everything going on. We thought it might be wise to wait before—” 
“No more waiting!” Cassian declared, slamming his fist against the table so hard the silverware bounced. “I swear to the fucking gods, if you’re not in the frenzy by the end of the week, Y/n, I’ll have you force feed Azriel myself.” 
“We agreed we’d be gentle in our approach,” Elain reminded him. 
“There was a plan in place for this?” Lucien sputtered. “And you were a part of it?” 
She scoffed and lightly slapped his arm. Elain was a gentle, lovely creature when she wanted to be, and nothing melted her heart more than a good love story. 
“I think we are in need of a celebration,” Vassa whispered. It was the first collection of words the firebird had spoken in months. 
She’d sat for every meal at Lucien’s side completely silent. But this time, she reached a hand across the table and slid it into yours, squeezing tightly. Flashes of memory passed behind her eyes — memories of Jurian.
They weren’t fae. A mating bond was never in the cards for them. Which was why she felt strongly that you should be greedy with the time you had together. For there was no telling when it would end.
You sucked in a breath. You’d spoken at length about this with Azriel, tossing ideas back and forth during the night when the bond made your blood sing for more contact with the Shadowsinger. More touches.  
But you’d agreed that it was inappropriate to have even a private mating ceremony when everyone was hurting. To abandon them and disappear into the frenzy. 
Perhaps you’d both been wrong. 
Given how quick everyone was to swarm you and Azriel, you were definitely wrong. 
Rhysand hobbled over with his cane, kissing your cheek with a loud, obnoxious smack before aggressively disheveling Azriel’s hair. 
“The cottage—” Azriel began.
“I’ll have it finished by tonight.” Rhysand promised. 
Cassian threw his one good arm around Azriel’s shoulder, tugging him out of his chair and towards the door on a mission. Poor Lucien was also coerced into joining whatever debauchery Cassian had planned for their afternoon. He sulked after the pair with Rhysand. 
Nesta, Feyre, and Mor crowded around you, already deliberating which of the many-frequented boutiques in Velaris they would need to visit for your mating ceremony attire. 
You were positively overwhelmed by the attention and the realization that this was all happening. 
By midnight, you would be mated to the love of your life. 
Azriel slipped out from under Cassian’s arm, racing back across the room and falling to his knees. “I need a moment with you.” He breathed, thinly-veiled hunger in his eyes. 
One nod was all it took before he was guiding you to the kitchen and slamming the door on everyone’s whistling. 
Azriel pressed you against the kitchen door, chest heaving so hard you could feel every beat of his heart against your chest. 
You’d both been holding back with each other ever since returning to the Night Court. Propriety and respect for his brothers had demanded you wait to express your love and wanting. You didn’t want to slap them in the face with joy. 
But now that you had everyone’s overwhelming approval, well… Azriel was finding it nearly impossible to wait even a moment longer. 
He pressed his lips to yours and didn’t let go of his soft grip on your waist until you were both gasping for breath. But then you kissed him back, swallowing his sighs and gentle groans like there was honey on his tongue. Sweet and addictive and—
Rhysand rudely knocked on the door, his sultry voice a purr. “In the kitchen, Azriel? Really? I would have expected more from a gentleman like you.” 
“Fuck off, Rhys.” 
The High Lord chuckled, but slipped away all the same. 
Azriel grinned against your lips, your hands clasped together between your bodies. “I just wanted one last kiss before tonight.” 
“Tonight.” You nodded frantically. 
Tonight. 
You were doing this. You were really doing this. 
Then you realized what he’d said. “I won’t see you before then?”
“I don’t think the others will let us.” 
Your laughs rang in the air, bouncing off the kitchen cabinets like wedding bells. 
On the other side of your door you could feel everyone’s anticipation. And you couldn't keep them waiting much longer. They might just break down the door. 
“I’ll see you tonight.” You whispered before stealing one last kiss. 
“Tonight.” Azriel agreed. His breath curled around your ear, lips brushing against the tip as he promised, “Until then.”
Feyre, Nesta, Gwyn, Emerie, Elain, and Mor descended upon the Palace of Thread and Jewels, all too eager to heap your arms full of the most expensive lace money could buy. 
You were about to marry into the Night Court and had a High Lord father who needed to make up for centuries of fatherly absence. There was more than enough gold to throw around.
“What do you think of this?” Feyre asked, draping the pale blue silk over your shoulder.
The clothier’s shop was bustling in the late morning, but no one dared step foot into the private room your family was set up in. The enchanted curtain blocked out all noise — tthe pinnacle of privacy.
You stood alone on a low platform, swishing the skirts of your dress and imagining what the finished product might look like. 
Farron, the clothier, had been quick to stitch a muslin mock up of the design you’d chosen, knotted fingers shocking in their dexterity as needle and thread disappeared and reappeared in her hand like some trick of the eye. She hadn’t even taken your measurements. One spin with your arms outstretched and she’d set about cutting the exact length of material needed for your mating ceremony gown. 
It was no wonder that she was Rhysand’s preferred clothier.
It still felt like a dream. Some wonderful, impossible dream as you took in the sight of the fabric over your chest. 
It glistened like moonlight and flowed like river water.
“Feyre, it’s perfect,” You breathed, touching the silken threads beneath your fingertips. 
“An excellent choice,” Farron said with a smile. She stood dutifully off to the side, tortoise-rimmed glasses growing her eyes to bug-like proportions.
You were a lovely thing in her eyes. A fine match for the Shadowsinger, indeed. 
Now, no one had told her that that was the cause for celebration. But she’d been clothing the Night Court males for a long while and knew them like the back of her hand. And you? You were made for the Shadowsinger. That much was clear. 
It was from centuries of experience that she classified the soft parting of your mouth and wide eyes. It was the look mates and brides alike adopted when they’d found the perfect dress. The one that would make them feel as perfect and precious as a pearl.
Your brows furrowed in concern. “My mating ceremony is tonight. Will it be ready by then?”
“Pfffft.” The clothier slapped her chest indignantly. “It will be ready in three hours time. You can return once after you’ve finished your shopping and we’ll have a final ceremony look ready for you, my dear.” 
With a dress being sewn together at Farron’s, Mor hurried you along to what she believed was the most critical part of any mating ceremony dress — the lingerie. The ordeal left a permanent blush on your cheeks as you quickly moved on to the shoemaker and then the jeweler. 
“Which one did you decide on?” Mor asked once again. She trailed at your heels, resting her chin on your shoulder as you kept your wares clutched to your chest. 
“I’m not telling you.” 
“Why not?” She whined. Red fingernails grazed the tissue paper that peaked out from the edges of the lingerie box. 
“Because that is for Azriel to know, and only Azriel,” you said, snatching the box out of her grasp. 
Nesta laughed. “What does it matter which pair she’s picked? It’s not like it will survive the first night of the frenzy.” 
Your cheeks burned with color. 
Mor giggled at your shyness. “Don’t act coy now, Y//n. We all know what you four read in your free time.” 
“Don’t act like you don’t benefit, love.” Emerie teased, squeezing Mor’s hip. 
“I never suggested such a thing.” 
Gwyn gagged when they kissed and everyone broke apart into fits of laughter in the streets, leaning against shoulders and stumbling on the cobblestones as they caught their breath. 
You were pressed in on all sides by familiar bodies, a comforting mixture of perfumes, and the sounds of laughter.
It’s happening. It’s really happening. 
Your grin could have put the sun to shame as you bounced on your heels in front of the mirror. 
Pale blue silk dipped down to the center of your chest and fell off your shoulders like mist. Wide, airy sleeves hovered at your elbows, ending in curls of hand-woven lace. A pair of ribbon-tie shoes and ear-tip cuffs completed the ensemble. 
They were both blue for Azriel — for your mate — who currently stood awestruck by the door. 
You didn’t startle when you caught a sliver of his reflection in the mirror. In fact, you were rather pleased to see his slack jaw and glistening eyes. 
“What do you think?” You asked as Azriel slipped out from the darkness and into your old bedroom. 
You hardly stepped foot in here anymore. Azriel’s bedroom had solidly become yours. Your clothes were mixed in with his. Your perfume bottles and soaps lined his bathroom. Your scent was tied to his bed, or rather your bed. 
“I think… I think you’re a dream, Y/n.” He spoke with a sigh. 
He melted into the curve of your neck, hands ghosting over your shoulders with a feather-light touch. 
He shook his head, as if disappointed. 
“No,” he corrected himself, “You’re far better than a dream because you’re real, and I can’t believe you’re mine.” 
“I could say the same about you,” you whispered. 
You leaned back against his chest and breathed deeply, feeling your heart soothe itself to the rhythm of his breathing and the scent of mountain air and cedar trees. 
He was beautiful. Black velvet encased his broad shoulders, cutting out a silhouette of pitch black night and highlighting the glow of his hazel eyes — like two chips of amber aglow in a dark wood. 
You couldn’t stop yourself from staring and threading your fingers into his soft, black curls, eliciting a soft groan from his lips that had your blood stirring to life. 
“I thought we were supposed to meet downstairs.” 
Azriel smiled. “I selfishly wanted to be the first to see you.” 
“That’s not selfish at all,” You hummed. You began tracing the gold cuffs that spanned the length of his ears and the subtle embroidery at the wrists and front of his shirt. They were distinctly Day Court fashions, and he wore them well. “These are new.” 
“I may or may not have reached out to your father for advice when picking out my clothes.” 
“I like them. Day Court colors suit you. They bring out the gold flecks in your eyes.” 
Azriel smiled, kissing the curve of your ears and playing with the sapphire necklace clasped around your neck. The drag of metal and fingertips over your chest had you shivering.  
You gently tugged at his hair and he obeyed the unspoken command to lean down and capture your lips in a kiss. Soft sounds spilled from both of you as he walked you back towards the wall and gently pressed you against it, flatting his hands by the sides of your head. 
Azriel got lost in the taste of you. Your hands in his hair. The feeling of your hips flush against his. Every movement was subtle, but eager, in its wanting and Azriel knew that when he finally had you beneath him, he’d be ruined… If he wasn’t ruined already. 
There was another reason he’d wanted to see you first before relinquishing you to the formalities of a mating ceremony. 
He’d been on edge all day, unused to being the unbridled center of attention among his brothers. Cassian was brash and loud, Rhysand flirtatious and passionate. Even Lucien radiated an undeniable charisma that made him popular within crowds. 
But Azriel had always prized quiet and peace above all else. He wanted to feel that peace again. 
The bond rose within him like high tide, spilling color and light into his chest as you pressed your forehead against his and cradled the curve of his neck. 
He breathed deep and he breathed freely, feeling something in his soul mend itself with a roll of anticipation. A tendril of cold wrapped around his ear and whispered in a language only Azriel could understand.
Too long, master. It’s been too long.
Azriel’s eyes flew open. He’d nearly forgotten the shape of their words — the language that he’d been taught to speak after years spent in the dark. Months of soft spoken words he could barely make out became a chorus of congratulations as they sensed the connection that now bound you and Azriel together. 
They’d known about it since the beginning, but now that you were also aware, they were ecstatic.
Black shadows spilled out from his skin, eagerly wrapping you up in a shell of twisting darkness. They embraced you, kissing your cheeks with cool, feathery touches. 
Azriel swallowed your laughter, hands diving down and lifting up your dress so he could squeeze your thighs and wrap your legs around him. 
It was a kiss made of teeth and longing and relief. With his shadows having returned and a mating bond ready to be accepted, Azriel felt invincible. Like he was cradling the world in his arms. 
But it was ended all too soon by a shadow in his ear that warned, They’re almost at the door. 
Gods he missed having them around. 
You gasped, picking up on the sound of Lucien and Helion’s strong footsteps coming towards the door. They were supposed to walk you downstairs before handing you off to your mate, and although Azriel had made leaps and bounds in earning their blessing you didn’t think they’d take kindly to seeing the Shadowsinger flush between your legs just before your mating ceremony. 
“Shit.” You hissed, untangling yourself from Azriel as he fixed your dress and struggled to hide his laughter. 
You pushed him backwards, masking both your scents and shoving him inside the wardrobe. 
“My Y/n, what are you doing?” Azriel asked. He needed to bend just to fit inside the empty wardrobe. His eyes glittered with amusement, shadows pooling around his wings. 
“I-I was going to try and hide you before my father and brother come inside but” — a handful of shadows curled around your wrists and ankles, intent on becoming permanent fixtures for as long as you were separated from your mate —  “I see that’s not necessary anymore.” 
Azriel grinned and pulled you in for one last kiss. “I’ll see you downstairs,” he whispered just as Lucien’s polite knock came at the door.  
“I’ll see you downstairs.” 
His shadows swirled around him and he melted into the darkness. 
Mating ceremonies were fluid, adaptable affairs. They could be as extravagant and public or as humble and private as one desired. It made no difference. You were his, and he was yours. Now and forever. 
You would have accepted the bond with Azriel in your father’s palace or in a desert wasteland. Still, you had to agree that home was best. 
The largest room in the River House — the dining room — had been cleared out for the purpose of your mating ceremony. Candlelight flickered atop the fireplace mantle where you, Azriel, and the priestess stood, and within sconces dripping with wisteria and baby’s breath along the wall. The light of a thousand lanterns, gauzy and warm, lit up the gardens outside the House.
“All kneel,” the priestess said, holding out two crowns of lavender and lilies of the valley. 
Everyone kneeled in a loose half-circle. 
Her dusty blue robes brushed against the floor as she placed the crown atop Azriel’s head and then yours. At her instruction, you shifted on the floor, facing each other with smiles that couldn’t be contained.
Azriel’s eyes burned bright, as if all the gold in the world had been distilled and dropped into them. 
You took the candles the priestess held out, holding them in your left hand and clasping together your right. 
Azriel snuck a quick kiss to your palm before the priestess could wrap your wrists and hands together with ribbons of blue and gold. She drifted her fingers over the candles and lit them with a flourish. 
Before the Mother, the priestess, and your family, you exchanged your vows. 
Secret glances passed between you and the Shadowsinger. Brief smiles tugged at the corners of your lips. Squeezing hands soothed your soul and grounded you in the present as you spoke the words together:
I give to you the hands of a warrior, lover, friend, and mate, till the darkness comes and our endings wake. 
I give to you my name, to hold on your lips and to pass on your years in hope and longing, in joy and tears.
Blood of blood. Bone of bone. I shall be yours, and you shall be mine. 
Until we return to the earth and hear the Mother’s song. Until the end of our days—
“Until death and beyond,” Azriel whispered the final vows. 
“Until death and beyond,” you replied. 
“Who the hell spilled the champagne!” 
The floor was already sticky with it, grabbing onto Rhysand’s shoes as he stepped out of the puddle. A guilty Feyre chugged the last dregs in the bottle, magicking away the spill with a snap of her fingers and a sultry wink towards her mate. She shrieked with laughter when Rhys limped over to her, collapsing around her shoulders and blowing kisses against her neck. 
Nyx sat at Amren’s feet on the floor, struggling to hold his violet eyes open as she scratched his head with her silver-tipped nails. Amren was not one for parties and regarded the room with bored eyes. 
Mor sat in the seat of honor — Emerie’s lap — whispering gossip in the Illyrian’s ear as you and Azriel tried to make yourselves sparse in the corner. 
You were half-hidden behind Azriel’s wings as he leaned his head against your shoulder. Leave it to you two to hide at your own mating ceremony. 
Lucien and Elain drank wine by the kitchen. She left her hand comfortably on his upper arm and smiled when he tucked a strand of wavy brown hair behind her ear. They were a handsome couple — all pale colors and golden gazes, like sunshine spilling over a new day. 
Helion, entertaining as always, dazzled the group that had assembled around him composed of Gwyn, Feyre, Rhysand, Cassian, and Nesta. Every so often his bright eyes would land on you and he’d wink before pointing threateningly in Azriel’s direction. 
Azriel’s shoulders shook with silent laughter and he dipped his lips to your ears and asked, “Do you think he’ll ever approve of me?”
“He already approves of you, he just doesn’t want you to know.” 
“He’s a smart male for keeping such a secret. My ego may grow too big for you to handle if he compliments me outright.” 
“Didn’t he once invite you to his bed?”
“That’s not very special coming from Helion.” 
You burst out laughing, attracting everyone’s attention as you buried your face in Azriel’s chest to stifle the noise. He laughed aloud as well. Head thrown back, chest and shoulders shaking. It was a full-bodied laugh that harmonized with yours as he wrapped his arms around you and rubbed your back. 
Azriel’s laughter had once been a rare sound, but you drew it out of him so easily, like a musician with their instrument. 
Feyre grinned and clapped her hands together. All at once the dining room rearranged itself. The candle flames grew brighter. A table laden with food and chairs popped into existence. 
For such a special occasion, you and Azriel sat at the head of the table, subtly leaning against one another with your legs tangled beneath the tablecloth as you ate.
There was a cake still waiting to be cut in the kitchen — a cake that you’d baked with Azriel’s name written all over it in invisible ink. 
Nyx twisted around in his chair, eyes utterly fixated on the seemingly endless rows of lanterns glowing in the garden. 
“Mom.” Nyx tugged on Feyre’s wrist as she cleaned his cheek. “When will I get to float the lanterns?” 
Feyre looked to you and Azriel. 
The lanterns were an old Day Court tradition. On the longest night of the year, Day Court citizens dared to step outside into the dark and light up the sky with their own sun-painted lanterns. It was a way to keep the darkness at bay for a little while longer. A time to add your own light to the night sky. 
“Now,” you smiled. “Let’s do it now.” 
You all spilled out into the gardens, cheering Nyx on as he raced ahead of everyone else with short, energetic strides. His wings flared out behind him, catching the name of the wind as it whispered against the velvety membrane. 
“Not yet!” Rhys reminded him. “You need to let your aunt and uncle go first.” 
You and Azriel picked up the largest lantern of them all, delicate rice paper crinkling as you held it up. The starburst-shaped lantern glowed faintly. A burning sun. A fallen star.
Everyone bent over in the flowers and grasses, hunting to find the second-best lantern for themselves. 
“This one’s for Velaria,” Nyx said, holding up a small, round orb. “This one’s for you, Daddy.” A pale lavender lantern was placed carefully in his father’s hand. “And this one’s for Mommy.” 
“Why thank you, honey.” Feyre bent low, kissing her son’s velvety black hair as she held Velaria in her arms. 
“Is everyone ready?” You called out. 
Cheers sounded from all around. Particularly energetic whoops came from Cassian and Mor, who tipped back their heads and howled like wolves, ready to throw their lanterns to the sky. 
Azriel tucked you beneath the curve of his wings and pressed a gentle kiss against your temple before you both let your magic seep into the lantern and sent it skywards. 
There was chatter from all sides. Soft gasps leaving open-mouth stares as a dozen lanterns started drifting upwards like miniature suns. 
“It’s all you, Nyx!” Azriel shouted. 
The boy leapt into action, finding the tallest patch of ground in the garden to make his directorial debut. He fixed the tilt of his bowtie and bent his knees. Slowly and dramatically he curled his fingers, raising his hands upwards like he meant to pull water out of the ground. 
He looked like an orchestra conductor leading his players in a great crescendo as the remaining one-thousand lanterns took off into the night sky. 
You gasped and flung your hands up to your lips. Three hundred and forty-three years you’d been alive, and this was the most beautiful sight you’d ever seen. 
You turned to Azriel only to find that he was already staring at you — at the light of a thousand suns reflected in your eyes. 
You found yourself proven wrong, and not for the first time. The lanterns were only the second most beautiful sight… and you wanted to see more.
Azriel read the idea forming in your mind and nodded. 
Without hesitation, you took his hand, slinking through the now darkening garden as everyone else’s attention was directed towards the sky. 
Lanterns arced through the darkness, staining the sky warm orange as if a painter had swept her brush over the black canvas. 
Shadows nipped at your heels and covered your tracks, urging you onward as you slipped back into the House and then the kitchen. 
You didn’t even bother cutting the cake. After rummaging around in the kitchen drawers for a spoon, you carved out a spoonful of chocolate cake with strawberries and a healthy dollop of whipped cream frosting — Azriel’s favorite. 
The Shadowsinger froze, eyes darting back and forth between the cake and your flushed face. Your eyes glowed in the dim light, marked by a quiet, otherworldly beauty Azriel had never been able to resist. 
“Don’t tell me you’re second guessing this now?” You breathed, moving the spoon closer to his lips. 
“I just… I just want to make sure I remember everything about tonight,” he whispered. 
He adjusted the crown of lavender and lilies on your head, picking up a loose flower petal that had drifted onto your bare shoulders. His touch was soft. Gentle. Reverent as he trailed his fingers up your neck and brushed his thumb along your jaw. 
His lips closed around the spoon, dragging off every crumb and lick of frosting while never taking his eyes off of you. 
It was probably a delicious cake, but all Azriel would remember was the taste of your lips that followed as he drew you to his body. 
When the bond had first snapped for him, he thought the world had cracked in two. Like the sharp clap of lightning across the sky. 
What followed after the sugar and chocolate melted on his tongue was the thunder — a resounding tremor as the bond glowed hot as iron before cooling into something permanent and unbreakable. 
Azriel let out a breathless noise. Something between a sigh and a shudder. He clutched your back, nails dragging lightly along your exposed skin in a way that had you melting. 
“I want to go. Now.” You rasped. 
You wanted him desperately. More than words could describe. 
Azriel scooped you up into his arms, and together you vanished into the shadows before anyone even realized you were missing.
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Author's Note:
Y'all, I just love Y/n and Azriel so much...
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THEY FUCKING DESERVE A PROPER MATING CEREMONY LIKE DAMNIT THEY BOTH NEARLY DIED LIKE 3X AND YES I'M GOING TO WRITE A SEX SCENE NEXT CHAPTER, I DON'T CARE, THEY DESERVE THIS, Y'ALL DESERVE THIS FOR PUTTING UP WITH ME FOR THE LAST 6 MONTHS AND OVER 100K WORDS LIKE YOU ARE THE TRUE MVPs AND I APPRECIATE YOU IMMENSELY!!! (*but also, if you're not into reading smut scenes, I'll write the next chapter in such a way that you can just skip over it and not miss anything continuity-wise)
THANK YOU FOR READING!
We're almost at the end I've got like two chapters left, one of which is already mostly written, and maybe the epilogue will be it's own thing or part of the last chapter i don't know and just UGH it's almost over... ok i'm going to end this author's note here because I'm getting sad just thinking about this fic ending
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^^ my reaction when I realize I've almost finished the longest/most intensive writing project in my life born out of love for the romantasy genre
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^^ my reaction when I realize I've almost finished the longest/most intensive writing project in my life born out of love for the romantasy genre
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