#I tried to do a couple versions of this with and without like a digital camera filter

[thou-babbling-brook]

“You have not yet served your purpose,” Minerva says, “You are meant for more. As are the other two.”

Fan art of my friend @rk1kincorrect’s fic, Qurbān. You can read it here!

[transhuman-priestess]

How I Scan Negatives

I've been doing film photography for 3 whole weeks so of course I am now an expert and you should toooooootally listen to me for my expert opinion on this matter.

But in seriousness, this post isn't meant to be a how-to guide, but if you can glean some useful information from it, that's really neat and I'm glad.

Part 1: The Scanner

There are a couple different ways to scan negatives. The simplest is known as camera scanning, and that just means you use some kind of backlight and take a close-up picture of a negative with a digital camera of some kind.

I've done a couple of scans like this but since it ideally relies on a macro lens, something which costs about $300 at a bare minimum, and more if you want one that's actually, yknow, good. Also, camera scanning inherently limits you to one picture at a time.

So my scanner is a flatbed Epson "Perfection" V600. I purchased this scanner because it is the least expensive flatbed scanner you can find that also does transparencies. It can scan 12 35mm negatives or two 6x9cm 120 negatives at a time. The Perfection V850 can do a full 36 exposure roll of 35mm but costs 4.33x as much.

So this thing is fine.

The first step is to cut my negatives up. This isn't as horrifying as it sounds. I have binder pages that hold 6 6-exposure strips, so a full roll of 35mm (which i will from here on out refer to with the slightly antiquated but slightly faster to type "135") takes up a single page.

Next, I mount them in the handy negative mounting frame that Epson provides, and put it in the scanner.

Now we can move on to the actual scanning.

Part 2: Scanning Software

This is, without a shadow of a doubt, the most irritating part of the whole ordeal. There's lots of decent scanning software out there, but there's fewer options for really good scanning software. Most of the "automatic" stuff sucks at being automatic so I end up doing most of it manually.

The scanner comes with the inventively named "Epson Scan," which is a very competent program if you want to scan and don't care about dust and scratches on your film. That is because I have yet to figure out what combination of options actually gets it to properly remove dust and scratches. This is mandatory, because I do not have $10,000 to spend on an industrial-grade negative pressure ventilation system for my bathroom/processing lab. Dust is avoidable, but ultimately inescapable.

The ins and outs of dust and scratch removal are interesting but not interesting enough for me to do a deep dive on them. The very short version is that the scanner scans every frame twice, once with visible light and once with infrared, and overlays the information from these to get rid of dust and scratches.

So instead of using the admittedly competent pack-in software, I opted to purchase SilverFast 9 SE. I paid $49 USD for this because I could not find a cracked version of the full-featured "HDR Suite" version and, frankly, i haven't missed the additional features.

SilverFast has a wizard option (Do they still call it that?) that walks you through the various steps of scanning. I haven't used it since my first roll.

The first step is to do a "pre-scan", which just scans the whole thing at a low resolution so you can pick the frames out of the lineup.

This is my screen at this point. The first step is to draw around the individual frames. This takes about 5-10 minutes depending on how anal i'm being about framing and overscan.

Now that i've let the computer pick the frames to save time for demonstration purposes manually picked my frames its time to boost the scan resolution from a postage-stamp 300 pixels per inch to an actually-usable 3200. You'll also note that i'm scanning these as "positives" rather than negatives. The "negative" scan option adds something called "Negafix" that i cannot turn off and that tries to color-correct for the negative stock's film base color. It is monumentally bad at this unless your stock is pre-loaded in its database which, as far as I can tell, hasn't been updated since 2005. We'll deal with that later though.

Now that we have the basic setting defined we go over to the "frame" menu seen above and copy these settings to all frames. I could set them manually, but copying settings over is the one thing this software is good at doing automatically. This may have something to do with the fact that it is essentially copy-and-paste, which you may recognize as a basic feature of every computer since 1987.

Occasionally, and unpredictably, the scanning software will turn on "Unsharp Masking." The wikipedia page on this option will explain it. I will not, because my contempt for the option rivals my contempt for the Republican Party, The Catholic Church, and Portland's insistence on driving 5 below the limit on the highway. I turn it off and if I could i would find whoever invented this option and eat their dog.

Once that is turned off we get to turn on the most beautiful option that SilverFast 9 SE has to offer, iSRD. iSRD is the previously-mentioned scratch-and-dust removal.

I have found that, in this one instance, the automatic settings are completely acceptable to me. They eliminate most of the really problematic dust in high-detail areas. The hairs and dust that gets left behind is usually easy to deal with via clone stamp later.

Now that the boring stuff is out of the way we get to the tedious, yet, to me at least, fun part. Histogram adjustment!

What you're seeing here is a histogram, its a graphical representation of the brightness of an image. Our goal with this is to maximize the dynamic range of the image. All that blank space to the right of the "mountains" (and some of the "lowlands" on the left) need to be eliminated so that the file can use as much of the bandwidth they have for actual useful image file stuff. This is pretty simple. We just slide those little arrows until they bound the mountains better.

Once we do this we can check the output histogram and see how it's mapped all the image data to the full bandwidth.

This has to be done individually per-frame, since each frame is slightly different.

Now that's done we can actually scan. I use the "Batch Scan" function, which scans everything one-after-the-other. I'm not going to show the dialog windows because 1.) its boring and 2.) I don't want to reconfigure the save path the way I did for the above images. It's a privacy thing.

After we've scanned everything its time to move on to...

Part 3: Color Grading

This is the part you've never heard about before. It's the most involved, and the most important, and it's worth getting into why.

Computers are amazing at storing information, at sorting information, at rearranging and processing information, but they are fundementally incapable of the most important part of dealing with information, assigning meaning.

I'm sure a lot of folks are going to be very very angry at me for saying that, but I actually don't care, and what's more, I'm confident the computer scientists I know will agree with me.

Film is better at storing images than computers. Period, this is a physical fact. The amount of dynamic range and resolution contained in film exceeds the ability of computers to contain it completely. So scanning is always going to be about compromises. You're trying to maximize the amount of useful information you can see by eliminating as much of the un-useful information as you can. But the computer doesn't actually know what is and isn't useful, so we have to tell it.

In order to do this, we use image editing software. I know a lot of photographers who swear by Photoshop, but fuck Adobe, and I know a lot of photographers who love GIMP, but GIMP's user interface is so convoluted as to be detrimental to my purposes. So I use Paint.NET, which is Windows-only, a fact which is sure to get me hate mail from several users including one of my best friends. (Sorry, Murder*.)

Here we have an unaltered** negative. There's a bit of overscan you can see on the left side of the image, and obviously its currently in portrait orientation. Before we go any further, I'm going to fix both of these things.

I like to crop my negatives in a 3:2 ratio. This is the natural aspect ratio of 135 film, and i like that similitude. Paint.NET lets me set a fixed aspect ratio for selections, which is nice

Now that the overscan has been cropped out and the picture is rotated properly, we can invert the image to a positive, and here is where it will become apparent to you exactly why color grading is important, and why there's no such thing as an "pure scan".

Wow! That's very...blue? Well, yes, it is. Color negative film mostly has an orange base. This helps compensate for shortcomings in the dyes used, and those shortcomings are why we have to color grade. The next step I take is to open the "levels" controls, where you'll see our old friend, the histogram!

This histogram looks different, but it's the same basic concept, with the difference that this program lets me adjust red, green, and blue individually. You'll also note that the individual RGB histograms broadly look similar, just out of sync. This is because of the orange base. They won't always look that similar, and in this case it's largely because the sky was overcast that day and there's a large amount of gray in the entire image.

We're going to adjust the input histogram first. Here, our goal is to map the maximum amount of dynamic range possible to the final image. Color balance is not yet important. So we slide the little arrows up and down from the top and bottom so that as much of them fill the output histogram as possible without clipping.

What is clipping? Clipping is when the black or white levels "blow out". Some clipping is acceptable in some images. A bright, sunny day will invariably have some clipping, and if you go out of your way to avoid it the image will look weird and flat. But in a picture like this where everything is muted and gray, we want to avoid it.

Clipping, by the way, looks like this, and is why i don't let the computer automatically adjust the level balance. Some people like this look with the deep black shadows, I do not.

But, onto doing it the Proper*** way

You can see the image is looking a lot better, but it still has a notably off color cast to the image. Its kind of green. Now we can move on to adjusting the output histogram. There's two ways to deal with this. We can adjust the input red, but this will result in highlight clipping. I actually don't mind highlight clipping as much, and in this case we have several red lights in the image both on the BMW and the crossing gate, so we're going to adjust that input histogram.

Truthfully, I should have thought of this before picking this image to do a demonstration on, but at this point its too late to turn back, and like I keep saying, this isn't a "how-to" guide.

So we still have a bit of a color cast, but its (mostly) in the midtones. Now it's time to bring out our secret weapon: gray balance, also known as neutral point or gray point.

That middle slider can be adjusted for red, green, and blue independently, and that's exactly what we're going to do.

This looks, for the most part, very good. I'll probably go back and tweak the gray points in the red and green a bit more, and i often go through these steps 2-3 times, repeating with finer adjustments before finally confirming the changes.

Truthfully, I don't remember if the BMW was pure white or eggshell white, so i'm going to err on the side of "eggshell" because the rest of the image looks weirder if i adjust for that white to be "pure".

And now, Voila! A fully color-graded image.

Does it look exactly like it did IRL? No, not quite, but again, scanning is all about compromise. I'm sure someone with more experience could do a better job than me, but the point here isn't to show you how to make things perfect, it's to show how I, Ivy Michaels do this.

If you made it through this far, congratulations! I love you! I hope you found this interesting. Thanks for reading <3

*Murder is e's actual name.

** i have censored the license plate of the 25-year-old BMW in my shot out of privacy concerns. It is not my car, and i do not know the owner. The negative has not been cropped, rotated, inverted, or graded in any way. Only the license plate has been removed by select-and-stretch. *** Despite my repeated slides into "we/us" language, this is not a how-to and is not intended to be a statement of objective correctness. It is "correct" in the sense of "correct to my personal workflow"

[frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe]

i had a worm wiggle it's way into my head when 'work song' came on on my way home today.

pairing: steddie | word count: 2,949 | rated: T

cw: major character death (no gore, nothing descriptive, though it's stated that Eddie was sick and getting weaker, then implied that he dies.)

Eddie Munson’s mother was a witch.

He didn’t know this until he was stricken with the same sickness that took her from him years and years before, but he knows now.

He knows from the small chest he found buried deep in his and his Uncle’s attic one day after learning of his ailment, and the handful of months he should expect to have left, from the local doctor. 

The chest was brimming with scrolls, tomes, candles, stones, herbs, vials, even a small pewter cauldron.

“I shoulda known,” was all Wayne had said, heeding Eddie’s beckoning call that hazy afternoon. 

Eddie sorted through everything he had found; spending hours every day flipping through each book and journal, deciphering his mother’s handwriting and the spells she had inscribed onto the pages. 

He even started to try a few; his mother’s ‘powers’, per sae, had come from the earth around her, writing in the largest, most disheveled of the journals that all she had needed to do was to listen to Mother Earth herself, listen to what she had to tell her.

So, Eddie practiced.

Small things at first, like seamlessly re-attaching the snipped off head of a daisy back to it’s stem, snipping it off again only to regrow an identical one in it’s place. Even starting a broken branch of the pine outside the Munson home on it’s way to a new green version of what was lost.

Eddie counted himself very lucky that Wayne was not one to believe the church’s nearly unhinged ramblings about witchcraft being the work of the Devil, and let Eddie practice a couple of the other simpler things on him.

“Jus’ don’t go thinkin’ I’mma let you chop my head off, boy.”

Wayne’s body aching from following their ox around all day with the plow? “Here, drink this, it should help.” It did.

Couple of Wayne’s fingers get snapped under the same ox’s hoof? A little harder, but he managed; the digits sore and achy that night, but good as new come morning.

“There a hair spell in that book, Ed?” Wayne joked one morning over breakfast, a good three quarters of the way through the six months the doctor gave Eddie, and a couple after finding Maggie Munson’s secret.

“Hmmmm….I dunno Uncle Wayne,” Eddie flips through his journal absently, “I think a Get Your Hair Back spell is too close to a love charm to work right. You could end up with hair all over your body and not just on that beautiful, shiny, head o’yours.”

“Love spells are touchy,” Maggie’s journal had said, “There are a rumored few that work, but only for the truest forms. I’ve tried some simple potions and charms…Al still left..and if they didn’t work…” the rest was easily filled in. 

“Oh yeah? Then how's about a Cure What Ails Ya spell? Got one’a those in that there book?”

“Why? You feeling sick, Wayne?” Eddie half-jokes, trying to veer away from having this conversation with Wayne again.

Wayne’s quiet as Eddie focuses intently on the book infront of him, trying, and failing, to scoop up a bite of egg onto his fork without looking away.

“Ed,” his uncle starts, soft and pleading once again, “Is there really nothin’ that can help ya?”

Eddie huffs, dropping his fork onto his plate and pushing it and the journal away from him. Definitely something a younger boy would do, not the nearly 25 he is now. “Why don’t you give them a look, huh? ‘Cause I already have.”

“Ed–”

He snaps his head up to glare at the older man. “What is it Wayne? What?” Eddie snatches the journal back up off the table without looking. “I’ve looked okay? Through Mom’s and through every damn book in that attic. And there was nothing. Nothing! You think she would’ve left if there was?” He stands sharply, knocking the small faded blue table away as he does. “Would’ve left m—”

His free hand wraps around his middle, nausea and the spins taking him for a ride a the sudden movement.

“Hey, Hey, sit back down son.” Wayne stands as well, coaxing him back into his chair. 

The nausea spells have become more frequent, the dizziness even more so, as the months have worn on, so Wayne ties up Eddie’s hair (growing thinner by the day), walks the short few steps to the pitcher of water he’d pulled from the well that morning, and pours some into a bowl, grabbing a clean(-ish) rag on his way back. 

Wayne smoothes the cool damp rag over Eddie’s face and neck, slowly and deliberately until the nauseous feeling passes.

“‘M sorry, Uncle Wayne, I know you’re just worried.”

“It’s alrigh’ boy, I shouldn’t’a pushed.”

“I’m still doing better than most,” Eddie says, voice tilting up at the end, “I think it’s ‘cause of the magic.”

“Thoughtcha said there wasn’t no cure in that book.” Wayne states, moving to empty the bowl. 

“There’s not,” Eddie closes his eyes, relaxes back into his chair. “Doc thinks Ms. Wilson had the same as me and Ma, and you saw how quick it took her.”

“Mrs. Wilson was nearly 70, Ed.”

“Then how about that boy Carver? He was my age, and Doc gave him six when he came down with it too, was gone in two.”

Wayne shrugs, “The devil wanted him back sooner.”

Eddie barks out a laugh, lifting his head to catch a glimpse of his Uncle’s ‘desperately-trying-to-hide-his-smile’ smile.

Wayne jokes, but Eddie’s been contemplating this for a while now. When he had hit his second month, he was about the same as he was, steadily growing weaker, as what was expected, but nothing like how Ms. Wilson and Jason had looked in theirs. 

Hell, Jason had worked on the docks with Eddie since they were boys; both fit and lean, healthy young men with the musculature to show for their work.

That was when he’d found his mom’s books, and ever since, his health had slowed to a crawl. 

“I think using mom’s magic is helping me.”

Wayne is quiet, cleaning their plates from the table and dumbing the leftover eggs out the window to the pigs. 

“I think it’s your magic now, Eds.”

—---

And so it went.

Eddie’s given six months turned into a year, his magic growing from healing fingerbones, to mending their ox’s broken femur with ease. 

His year didn’t come without worsening symptoms though, and his previously well filled out overalls hung loose around him, his calves barely filling out the tops of his boots tied all the way tight. 

Wayne always kept the faith, so to speak, not a religious man by nature, but Eddie could hear him sometimes in the early morning and late night praying to “Whoever’s got their ears on up there,” to keep Eddie safe, to keep him in their sights when the time came. 

Eddie had been doing work of his own, too. Writing down anything new he found out while sitting with the Earth, listening, watching….

Mother told him through the whispers of the trees, the soft humming of the grass, that he’d know when it was time. 

And that time was within the next few days. 

He felt it in his bones, he felt it in the air when Wayne passed him his birthday gift (a flaky scone with the biggest chunks of chocolate in town, an amazing treat he got once a year) on the morning of his 25th year, he felt it in the very ground he walked on…

He was ready, though he did harbor one regret. One thing he knew he missed out on.

He’d never fallen in love.

Over his last year, Eddie would sit with Mother; amongst the trees, lain back in the field of grass on the hill behind their house, and tell her about them. 

The ‘they’ that he’d likely never meet, the they that would love him for nothing but his love in return. 

Nothing was ever specific, only the vaguest feelings he’d get about them, about the way they’d love, the humor they’d possess, the love for Eddie’s stories they’d have.

And every time he’d speak of them, Eddie’d leave with something that he didn’t realize he had picked up until he was nearly back home. 

A chain of daisies Wayne had plucked from atop his head when he sat down for dinner, a scrap of dark blue fabric he’d found walking through town, a bouquet of bright yellow daffodils, the tiny sun bleached skull of a bat.

And he’d write. Over and over, never quite getting it right, but there was something he knew he needed to get out of his very being before he left for good. Something that felt like a promise.

–

The morning came, and Eddie awoke to a silent house. 

Wayne out on the fields already, most likely out helping the folks on either side of them with whatever they needed doing, with only the hens’ clucks and pigs’ snorts keeping him company with the calls from the birds in the trees. 

Eddie got up, slow as slow could be, got himself into his clothes, shuffled down the hall to the kitchen to their small blue table, tore out a blank page of his mother’s notebook and wrote.

Pouring all of what remained within him, Eddie thought of the Earth, of his mom, of Uncle Wayne, and them. His unknown love.

-x-X-x-

Steve Harrington’s mother was not a witch.

But for the last few years, he’s had a suspicion that his Grandmother is.

Everyone says that their food tastes so good because “It’s made with love!”,  but with Mama Harrington, it was real. The love and intent she imbued into her meals was there. And she could cure any ailment.

She would always go on and on about the importance of food, each recipe’s ingredients’ healing powers, and of the recipes and their stories that had been passed down through the years from her mother, and her mother’s mother, all the way to now, where they ended up in a cookbook that’d gone untouched since it was given to Steve’s mother in the late 60’s.

“A gift! Unused for so many years, Steven!”

“I know, Mama,” he nods again, dropping some green something into the pot of sauce bubbling on the stove. “Almost 25 years.”

“Aye! You have catching up to do.” she says, shaking a thick wooden spoon at him.

“Me?” he scoffs, “I don’t know the first thing about cooking, Mama!” Baking? He’d hold his own. Cooking? If his grandmother wasn’t there to help him of on the phone to guide him through a recipe? Kitchen would go up in flames.

“Bah! Watch closely, dear.” she says, shuffling to the pot that stands nearly as tall as her where it’s perched on the stovetop. “It is always your intent behind what you are cooking. You can make anything be anything as long as the intent is there.”

“Even eggs?”

She nods, her nearly fully white bun flopping back and forth on top of her head. “Even just eggs.”

“So if I want a carbonara to help get my friend a passing grade?” he asks, incredulous, but immediately thinking of Robin, who’s coming up on her finals in a couple months (for her doctorate! A PhD! Can you believe that!).

“The intent! Put it into the eggs, into the pasta, I don’t care! But make it for That!”

She throws a concerningly large handful of pepper into the pot on the stove, and gives it a stir.

“Now, this is my Mama’s recipe, and it will help your Pa’s back.”

“How so?”

“Because I told it to,” she growls, glaring at the pot and raising her spoon as if she was going to smack some sense into it.

“Alright, Mama,” Steve chuckles, “What do you need me to do?”

He spends the next hour helping his grandma roll out some of her premade dough for some fettuccine looking noodles, grabbing a wrapped up blob “from the top shelf, Steven. That’s the stuff I made for you.”. 

He rolls, folds, and cuts it as he’s told, then goes to pick Robin up from campus while she finishes everything.

“It won’t take long now, dear, and you shouldn’t either.” Mama scolds, waving her spoon around once again.

“Got it, Mama, be back soon.” He slips on his shoes, looks in on his grandpa in the living room as he passes, grinning at the loud snores he hears from the direction of Pa’s recliner, and slips out the front door to his car. 

In no time, he’s picked up Robin, stopped for a movie from Blockbuster, and is home to the smell of fresh bread.

“We’re home Mama!”

“I’m just setting the table, grab your Pa!”

“Come on Pa, Mama’s got some pasta for you.” Steve says, coaxing his grandfather out of the chair and into his slippers. 

“Ah, perfect, my back’s been real achy lately.”

“That’s ‘cause you sleep in the recliner, Mr. Harrington.”

“How many times do we gotta tell you, Robin? Just call us Ma and Pa.”

Robin plops down in her designated spot across from Ma, “Hey, you should get used to it now; Once I finally get up the nerve to Chrissy out, she’ll come over here all “Mr. Harrington” this and “Mrs. Harrington” that.

“And how’s that coming, Bobs?” Steve asks her, sitting down beside his grandma and immediately passing the plate of bread across the table to Robin’s waiting hands. 

She starts going off at a million miles a minute about her longest standing crush, while Steve shares a look with his grandma, both smirking conspiratorially as Robin takes a bite of the bread.

That’d been Steve’s suggestion, a bread imbued with luck.

It wasn’t a “Love Spell”, Mama said there was none in existence that were worth the pain. But the minimal luck that she had sown before into countless baked goods (especially near February), have had a surprisingly great track record.

With everyone but Steve.

She couldn’t quite figure out what it was that kept him from getting the benefits too, every time she had tried, they had tried, it was an astounding failure. 

First with Tommy Hagan, the carrot cake cookies Steve had presented him with as a special birthday treat back in middle school ended with two missing front teeth and a broken arm.

Then again without even thinking about it, he’d added some luck and hope to homemade chicken pot pies he’d whipped up when he and Nancy were on the rocks. 

It had somewhat worked with Billy Hargrove, but that one hadn’t even been intentional, and he shudders to think about it to this day.

“I don’t know my dearest, maybe it is because you are already tied to someone else?” She had said after her tried and true pot pie recipe failed.

“But it didn’t even work with the one I was already with!” he yelled, sighing deep and pinching the tears away from the bridge of his nose. “She jumped right into Byers’ arms.”

Mama had just given him a pitying look, which was worse, honestly.

Now, he stays far away from any of Mama’s lucky foods, especially with the weird twisting feeling he had gotten the few times he’d tried over the years after leaving Hawkins.

He and Robin came up to Indy for Robin to go to U of I, a year after she graduated, and when Steve was fired from the job that had been paying the majority of their apartment's rent when he was spotted kissing his then boyfriend by his manager….they came to live with Steve’s grandparents, taking to them both with open arms and hearts.

He comes back to the present when his third bite of pasta clears away the last of his headache.

Steve shoots his grandma a knowing look, which she ignores with a sip of wine. 

–

They’re nearly finished with dinner when it happens.

Steve’s listening intently to a story Pa is telling them, something he’s sure he’s hears a dozen times before, when he absentmidedly picks up, then takes a bite of the bread Ma made for Robin.

It’s more than he’s ever felt before.

In the past, whenever Steve’s tried to gain some luck in love, he’s been inundated with flashes, feelings, words, a warmth in his bones that he’s wanted to hold onto forever. 

The feelings grew stronger the older he got, and now, Steve finds himself sitting on a rolling grassy hill. 

It’s not a flash of a vision like before, he’s sitting in the tall soft grass, and his hands are already making a chain of daisies. Nearly done, in fact. 

He finishes it off, turns it around in his hands, then when he goes to put it on…

He’s back at the table with his family, the slice of bread in his hand, and Pa still telling his story.

Steve jumps up, startling the other three, and beelines it to the kitchen, flinging open drawers, searching for just a damn scrap of paper. 

Mama follows him, “Steve, the bread?”

“I was on a hill, chaining daisies, and now I have to get these words out.” He probably doesn't make a lick of sense, but he doesn’t want to lose them.

Suddenly, a pad of paper and pen are passed into his line of sight. He snatches them up, and starts scribbling down as much as he can.

He and Mama stare down at the words on the page. 

“Mama, what is this?”

She is silent for a handful of breaths.

“This is why the luck never worked.”

now with a part 2!

also: i don’t know the first thing about being a witch or anything of the sort, nor do i know anything but the basics about cooking; hope im not way way off on anything!!! this is all in fun 😅

[lagunapoint]

Hey, lovers, I’m this close to creating a solavellan-mythal-elgar'nan-arlathan story in The Sims 2. Yeah, I’ve seen all the buzz about The Sims 2 getting re-released, but… man. The only place I had it until now was on an old laptop that can’t even handle new versions of google chrome lol. Also, a few years ago, I had a bit of a grudge against EA because I actually emailed their support about The Sims 2 haha. I asked if there was any way to get it or if it was still available for purchase because, damn, that game had kids running out of the room in tears when their parents argued.

EA’s response? The Sims 2 is the sunset of the series, sorry, go play The Sims 4 kjfskd

Then I missed out on the Ultimate Collection giveaway, and now it’s finally back for sale.

Piracy? I folded my jolly roger a couple of years ago lol.

And now I’m just staring at the steam page, feeling kinda weird because I want it. I want the mods too. And I don’t even care that there’s no IKEA pack because I’ve got a porn mod Imao

But it's so stupid to buy The Sims 2 again. I already bought this game on a DISC, both the base version and separate expansions, then one with all the expansions. Then there was a time of piracy because the era of laptops without disc drives so logic, and it was impossible to get a digital version of The Sims 2. And now greed has consumed EA, and they put it up for sale again for $30. Veilguard costs almost the same. It's a new game, and The Sims 2 is like 50 years old? >.<

I love The Sims 2 more than any other game in the series but.... EA is squeezing money out of me and preying on my weakness. *Glances at my Dragon Age purchases*

And what can I do if they're playing on nostalgia? I even have a two-episode short film on YouTube that I, for god’s sake, made in The Sims 2.

Yeah baby I have no idea what tone this post even has either. Am I criticizing EA, or do I love them? Incredibly hard to say. Actually I’ve never made my top DA pairings in the sims before hehe, Have you? I’m afraid it’s gonna be a mess, just like when I tried it with Doctor Who characters haha

I don't even know what other gifs could better capture the mood that completely dominates this whole stupid topic of buying The Sims 2 yet again

why is fenris flirting with solas or is it the other way around? I'm laughing at these gifs heheh

💜 

[arrowverse-next-gen]

color coded memories

Familiar surroundings, but foreign to the soul, Reid Smoak navigates what things mean for him and his loved ones now that they live where things should be safe.

Stay inside. Stay safe. It’s what she told them to do, the one request their mother made when the rip had spat them out in a Starling City that looked like a funhouse mirror version of their home. 

Star City. It took time to get used to the differences, though Reid knew it was the similarities that were causing fissures for them. Things were so close to normal that the slight off vibrations felt like attacks to the mainframe.

Take the clock tower overlooking the Glades. Back home it had been full of light and warmth, their sanctuary from him. But the building hadn’t been kept up here. The clock still shone out, lighting up the night life below them, but inside wasn’t a home. The columns didn’t hold the pin holes where their mother had tacked up photos of him and Diana growing up, the beams above weren’t dotted with tiny glow-in-the-dark stars in order to help him find his way to dreams, and the first hundred digits of PI wasn’t written in crayon on the bricks along the wall from when Diana tried to prove she could beat him to the end of the infinite number. He could walk from one side of the tower to the other, blindfolded, but the air around him held a stranger's presence. They came there for familiarity and instead found ghosts of a life never lived in its walls. 

They didn’t stay inside. Reid was sure on some level his mother knew they’d leave, knew they’d be too curious, too smart, too much like the other half of their DNA to listen fully. 

While he initiated the idea, Diana had wanted to explore too. The light that sparked in her eyes when he suggested it, when he showed her the tracker on their mother’s location. And he may be older by a few minutes, but Diana never did anything she wasn’t willing to do alone. 

They met family, though the word felt coarse like sand in his mind as he thought it over. Back home they didn’t use that word for many. Traditionally Reid knew what family meant. Grandparents, aunts and uncles, cousins, friends who had been attached to your parents lives for longer than they could imagine a world without them. But the way his mom has explained it once, she’d lost all those people the same day she had said ‘i do’ to him.

She told them once that had she seen the signs, had known what was coming, she could have gotten out before he knew about them. But her parents had an accident, their plane never making it back to Vegas. Mercer’s older sister and her young family had been on a boating trip, the vessel never returning home. Each and every friendship she had blipped out of existence, and for the first couple months she only saw them as tragedies that had latched themselves to her very existence. 

She had work, work that her husband had pushed her into continuing

“You can wade through the grief, if you push yourself towards the end goal.”

She said it helped at first, mourning her family by remembering her father and sister had put her on this path in the first place. She could picture her mother’s words of encouragement when she solved a difficult line of code.

But the longer it took for her to solve a problem, the more he pushed. She started to notice things felt less like encouragement and more like demands. 

The day he came home to Mercer holding a positive pregnancy test, he had wished she could take back each second forward. 

He spiraled, threw things across the apartment, grabbed her wrists and pushed his fingers into her veins. She couldn’t move, petrified of the alarms going off in her head.

“After everything. The plane, the boat, this is going to delay everything I've been working towards.”

Back home, family was his mother fierce and brilliant, hard lines of rules, but kindness that could only be grown in a heart that’s suffered. It included his twin sister, younger by less than seven minutes but separated by one day thanks to the arbitration of time.

But even before Mercer shared the facts with them, Reid couldn’t fit his father into the picture of what felt like family.

Unlike his mom, Billy never smiled at them for just existing. Ever since he and Diana had learned to work their way into Mercer’s computer at the age of four to order half a dozen pints of ice cream to their home at close to midnight, their father only seemed happy about what they could do for him.

“The faster they learn to code, the sooner this project is back on track.”

But here, in Star City they had cousins, cousins presumably came with aunts and/or uncles. After a search that felt almost too easy to do, Reid found that not only did their mother have family in this new world, she had sisters, parents, a brother. She had nieces and nephews (some he and Diana spent the evening talking with). 

If they were other types of people Reid would have been skeptical. Just because some of these people share the same names as people from their mother’s past, didn’t automatically make them family. But their mother was also smart, and Diana had always been better at picking a pocket. 

Mercer had done the research, his sister had taken the information without their mom seeing, and Reid had put it all together. He understood the science behind other earths, they had helped their mother set off the detonations that opened their home to this place. But somehow knowing it, and being in a room with people he could have had in his life before, was almost too much. 

Buzzing in his head, pressure constricting his lungs until they burned. A panic attack he could deal with. He’d had enough of them when Billy had locked him or Diana away.

 They were bad at first, like the world was closing in on him, regardless of whether it was him or her burrowing into the pile of coats nestled on the floor. Even though it wasn’t a rational thought, Reid knew that they both could feel the other’s fear when they were in the dark, so he had learned how to cope with the panic that set it.

Grounding himself to the present moment. What can you see? Smell? Hear ? Taste? Touch? If he closed his eyes hard enough in that closet, he could almost experience those things as if he was sitting in the room next to his sister. And when the roles were reversed he tried to run through each one for Diana, it was his only defense he could offer her.

So he could push past a panic attack almost on instinct. And when his vision came back into focus, he only saw his sister.

“We have to go if we wanna get back before Mom.”

She did him a solid for not bringing it up, and the pair of them rushed back to the clock tower, climbing up the rusted fire escapes and tucked back into the haven that was the shell of a former home. 

He could feel the question Diana pushed towards him with her stare when they were settled. 

Are you going to be okay?

He nodded, not trusting a real answer to come from him. Instead Reid focused his attention out into the night, down below while the light of the tower washed the street below in a false safe glow. 

He watched as his mother walked up to the building, not alone, speaking to someone other than he or Diana.

Though he couldn’t hear either of them, Reid could see his mother clearly in the time driven golden light. She smiled at the man. Confusion and shame filled him at once. In his seventeen years he’d only ever seen his mother smile at him or his sister, it was something else from that had been just theirs. Mercer didn't give Billy the luxury of her kindness, her eyes stayed steely every moment his father spent in the same room as them. 

But there she stood, features softening for someone unknown to them. Reid hated the unknown, he sought knowledge and planned his routes on the notion that if he knew what was coming he could deal with it. But how did he deal with the idea of sharing his mother with strangers?

[luigiblood]

An interpretation of the Dolphin on Steam situation.

As a reminder, Dolphin, the GameCube and Wii emulator, had announced a release of a Steam version using features from Steam like cloud save, Steam Deck native support and all.

A couple of days ago, Dolphin's Steam page was pulled down, then Dolphin's official blog mentioned a DMCA takedown, and PC Gamer reported on it, quoting the DMCA. Then we all went a bit crazy over this, then Delroth, a former Dolphin member, talked in a bit more detail, and debunked a misunderstanding.

You can still read this from Delroth here: https://mastodon.delroth.net/@delroth/110440301402516214

EDIT: Delroth has made one more very interesting post on Reddit about encryption keys in emulators here: https://www.reddit.com/r/emulation/comments/140b7x5/are_dolphin_devs_special_in_bundling_decryption/

All in all, the situation was misinterpreted from all sides, and to sum it up, according to Delroth: Valve asked Nintendo about this, and Nintendo said they don't want this, and quoted the DMCA's set of laws. In fact, not only Delroth says this, a lawyer contacted by PC Gamer essentially says the same thing in the updated report here.

One more preface: I am NOT a lawyer, legal text is very hard to fully grasp, this is only my own interpretation of the situation, what I am about to say may be VERY VERY WRONG. Got it?

The Digital Millennium Copyright Act is a copyright law from 1998. It is made of several titles and acts. The first title contains the anti-circumvention part which we'll get to later. The second title contains the takedown process part.

DMCA Takedown

I'll get to the second title first:

To sum it up, this is the part where you can do a copyright infringement claim, a "notice and takedown" process. This process also includes the ability of a counterclaim.

NONE OF THIS HAPPENED ON DOLPHIN ON STEAM. Nintendo did not use this process. They just told Valve a reason, and it was Valve's decision alone that got the emulator removed, and they notified Dolphin of the reason.

I won't really debate much on this, it's not really interesting.

"Anti-circumvention"

Now, the anti-circumvention part, the meaty part. There's a lot of legal text, but I will translate to the best of my abilities to you, don't worry.

This is the part where I feel the least comfortable about, and again, this is an interpretation, but let's start again from that quote that I had (from PC Gamer, by the way):

the Dolphin emulator operates by incorporating these cryptographic keys without Nintendo’s authorization and decrypting the ROMs at or immediately before runtime. Thus, use of the Dolphin emulator unlawfully 'circumvent[s] a technological measure that effectively controls access to a work protected under' the Copyright Act.

The thing is... I only said that indeed, the Wii Common Key, required to decrypt everything, is included in Dolphin's source code. It's... not necessarily the problematic point of this, as I tried to read more into it, and I will go back to the Lockpick_RCM actual DMCA takedown.

Lockpick_RCM is a Switch tool that gets a set of keys from your Switch console and puts them into an easy to read file that could be used in conjunction with other Switch tools. They're required to decrypt pretty much everything about the Switch, from games to other packages.

The use of Lockpick with a modified Nintendo Switch console allows users to bypass Nintendo’s Technological Measures for video games

A thing you read a lot is "Technological Measures"... turns out this has a bit of a definition in 17 U.S.C. §1201... or rather, in that text itself, here's the very first thing you can read:

17 U.S.C. §1201 (a)(1)(A) No person shall circumvent a technological measure that effectively controls access to a work protected under this title.

The wording "circumvent a technological measure" happens to have a definition tied to it:

17 U.S.C. §1201 (a)(3) As used in this subsection— (A) to “circumvent a technological measure” means to descramble a scrambled work, to decrypt an encrypted work, or otherwise to avoid, bypass, remove, deactivate, or impair a technological measure, without the authority of the copyright owner; and (B) a technological measure “effectively controls access to a work” if the measure, in the ordinary course of its operation, requires the application of information, or a process or a treatment, with the authority of the copyright owner, to gain access to the work.

It's a somewhat precise definition, actually, and purely relying on it... this makes pretty much everything Wii, 3DS, Wii U and Switch a very dangerous situation.

The "technological measure" also has a definition:

17 U.S.C. §1201 (a)(3)(B) a technological measure “effectively controls access to a work” if the measure, in the ordinary course of its operation, requires the application of information, or a process or a treatment, with the authority of the copyright owner, to gain access to the work.

Basically it just means a DRM (Digital Rights Management) process of sorts.

A lot of people loves to talk about the previous lawsuits on emulators, but note that I never mentioned the emulation being the issue here. Nintendo is NOT arguing, on a legal level anyway, that emulators are illegal by being one, their communication team does by stifling innovation in their public arguments.

According to 17 U.S.C. §1201 (a)(3)(A), just having encryption is enough to consider that they're protected, and just decrypting is already illegal... this affects a lot more than you think, it's not just Dolphin at this point, it seems we misunderstood a lot of things about the DMCA.

To sum it up more bluntly: I don't feel like the encryption key is the main argument, it's actually about what you do with it that they argue against.

So even if Dolphin removed the Wii Common Key, if they still include the decryption process, even if you provided the key yourself from your own system, EVEN your own Wii dumps, the argument here implies that since you're still decrypting the Wii dump data, this last part is argued to be illegal. This ain't right.

Now apply this to everything else, even if you decrypted the game beforehand so that Dolphin doesn't even decrypt anything, the problem would be moved to the dumper or the decrypter tool doing it. This applies to a lot of systems.

Considering the definition I showed earlier, this seems hard to argue against, however, notice that I never said anything as fact, and insisted that it is Nintendo's argument, legally speaking, I believe this is an important distinction to make.

Exceptions?

The law also explicitly defines exceptions to this, but please read carefully, because this is where I start to really interpret from here:

In 17 U.S.C. §1201 (a)(1)(B), my understanding is that when the protection itself prevents legitimate use, then you are allowed to break it. That said, and this is important: The later subparagraphs defines these paragraphs as something that CANNOT BE USED AS A DEFENSE. This is only there to shield the Library of Congress from any attack, and to allow them to research the various impacts that the protection does and determine rules. Their ruling is also explicitly not allowed to be used as a defense in the text.

After reading a lot of this, I only found one thing that, very honestly, I find quite unclear. Subsection (f) about Reverse Engineering, is particularly showing how much they're not well versed in computer science.

17 U.S.C. §1201 (f) basically says if you're trying to understand how the program works, you are allowed to circumvent the protection, under the idea that you're doing analysis, or...

17 U.S.C. §1201 (f)(2) for the purpose of enabling interoperability of an independently created computer program with other programs, if such means are necessary to achieve such interoperability, to the extent that doing so does not constitute infringement under this title.

In the case of infringement, I believe this is about copyright in general, as the law suggests this does not affect copyright laws in any way.

So what is interoperability... well let's take the definition from there:

17 U.S.C. §1201 (f)(4) For purposes of this subsection, the term “interoperability” means the ability of computer programs to exchange information, and of such programs mutually to use the information which has been exchanged.

So we're talking about the ability for a program to exchange information with the work, in this case, a game for example.

...what is this? Programs exchange information all the time. That's even the basis of a computer. Maybe there are other definitions, but frankly I can't be bothered to read even more legalese right now.

With just this, and not taking into account anything else, I feel like this allows emulators to work, they don't really modify the game, they try to run it within a sandbox, where a lot of information is exchanged to make sure the program runs as intended.

Oddly enough this would still make the ability to run those games on a modded Switch still illegal though, while emulators could be allowed to do this.

But make no mistake: This is not a legally tested argument. I need to repeat: This is an interpretation. Lawsuits literally work with lawyers interpreting information and the laws, and argue. The whole idea of laws being unclear is not necessarily a fault, it's specifically why lawyers exist.

Why now? And what now?

Honestly, as much as Nintendo argued, for the time being, they have not shown any intention to take down Dolphin as a whole. They could just argue as a scare tactic to prevent Dolphin to reach an even more mainstream status. I doubt Nintendo didn't know about Dolphin for that long.

Until I see an actual DMCA takedown, or worse against Dolphin itself, I'm going to assume Dolphin will stay up for a long time.

Removing the Wii Common Key from Dolphin will not change the situation, as it is the whole decryption process that the argument is about.

Whether Citra, Cemu, Yuzu and Ryujinx could have included the keys or not, the argument would still be the same here.

TL;DR of the complicated part

About the takedown itself:

Valve asked Nintendo about Dolphin on Steam, and they argued that Dolphin is illegal because it decrypts Wii games, and Valve, on their own accord, took down Dolphin from Steam from this. (Note: GameCube does not use encryption and cannot be impacted by this.)

An actual lawyer also takes this as a warning from Nintendo to Valve according to PC Gamer.

About the argument that Nintendo used against Dolphin:

Encryption Keys are NOT the main point of contention, because...

The encryption itself, as a whole, is argued by Nintendo to be a protection measure.

This means that decrypting the game outside of the intended way by the copyright owner (Nintendo, on a Nintendo Switch) is argued to be illegal by default.

The law, as in how I interpret it, goes in that sense, but for some reason you are allowed to make an additional program that can "interoperate" with the protected works in question and explicitly is allowed to break the protection. This is a vague part, and could be used in defense of Dolphin, potentially.

The final answer can only be answered in a courtroom.

[troglobite]

copying & pasting from my thread on bluesky

please someone fucking help me with this shitty stupid fucking issue

please can someone help me. just in the last couple weeks, i've had a brand new problem on my laptop. videos just stopped fucking playing on every website. at first, it was that they would lag and glitch, but the audio would continue or skip. i'd have to force shutdown the whole thing.

then, it became that videos wouldn't load in the first place, and wouldn't play. initially, restarting my laptop seemed to help. then it no longer did. then i got an error: "your laptop has no working memory" or whatever it is on mac. i took care of it. i cleared ALL cookies on ALL browsers.

that helped--for a couple days. but i've had to KEEP clearing cookies/cache REPEATEDLY and restarting my laptop. normally i tax the fuck out of my laptop's ram, i know--i'm notorious for having a LOT of windows AND tabs open all at once. but i have for years without issue. AND--

i wouldn't be an idiot abt it, i would close things & restart my laptop, or let it sit just completely off for a while, clear stuff out, delete things, etc. but it ran FINE. out of NOWHERE it started doing this^^ shit. so now, i barely have enough windows/tabs open to do what i need to do--

still in single digits, mind you. and within ONE DAY, the video issue will start happening again. i've refreshed firefox entirely, which has meant the loss & reinstallation of my 2 add-ons (xkit rewritten & ublock origin), and tons of other important settings. i've done it fucking THREE TIMES NOW.

it helps BRIEFLY. i did it last night, it lasted all day today. i just had to do it again, because all the videos stopped loading, and keystrokes etc. started lagging again. I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUCK TO DO. there is NOTHING FISHY in my activity monitor! it is EXCLUSIVELY firefox eating up cpu

and no matter what i do, over the course of a day, it'll SKYROCKET up to RIDICULOUS amounts of memory. doesn't matter how little i have open or what i'm doing, it just accelerates. WHAT THE FUCK CAN I POSSIBLY DO?! do i just switch browsers AGAIN? like this is fucking stupid!

it's not my laptop's fault, it's firefox's. but i don't know HOW OR WHY. i've tried everything i reasonably can, as a non-tech person. someone PLEASE HELP ME. what other options are there? what can i possibly do? is it actually my laptop? like i tried clearing my LAPTOP's memory & that didn't help

it's the fucking browser, but i have no extra plug-ins that are eating up space. it's purely VIDEO and AUDIO. in addition to socmed sites with scrolling. for YEARS this was NEVER A PROBLEM. and now suddenly it is, no matter how little i use them, no matter how much i delete cookies or refresh FF.

someone please please help me. i'm at my wit's end. this is completely untenable & i don't wanna buy another fucking blood mine laptop or have to switch to another browser, only for the SAME PROBLEM to happen all over again. bc to be clear--the video problem happened in chrome, too.

i just don't use chrome for much of anything, so it's been less noticeable/relevant. i checked the initial video issue on chrome, and it happened there, too, so i cleared THOSE cookies, as well. since i don't browse there, i haven't cleared it more than once or twice since. it's not using cpu--

the way that FF is in my activity monitor. &again, no malware that i can see, all operations NORMAL. it's FF & every process that it demands of my laptop that is using too much memory. &then somehow resulting in videos not loading or playing, & obscene lag. also yes, FF is on the newest version.

[alecatmew]

Rainbow Eagles

A Fire Emblem: Three Houses fan piece that took me over a year to take from concept to final painting.

I’m documenting this one here now because all the WIPs are in a Twitter thread and actually a blog post is probably a better medium for chronicling things and adding some thoughts.

I’ll start with thoughts on the final piece. I’ll admit, I’m not fully happy with how it came together. The colours are nice, but looking at it three years later, many of the faces are a bit weak. I think I was torn between how much detail to put into various parts of the image when working with watercolours, which can be temperamental – and I was trying to deliberately incorporate unpredictable elements like paint splatters to boot. I was probably too afraid of messing things up further with the faces to work them much more, including adjusting skintones. Some of this fear is justified – watercolours are not a medium that afford a lot of flexibility for adjustments or fixes.

Still, I think it’s fair to say the final piece suffers for my fearful approach.

I’m going to take you through all the test pieces that went into this piece and I think you’ll understand my disappointment after you see them – when there’s great elements in a test piece, their absences in the final artwork feel like a letdown.

We’ll start with the very first scribble, which apparently was the product of insomnia. I think it was pen scribbled straight over a watercolour gradient.

After that, the idea for the full painting quickly formed – a circle to span the whole rainbow.

I was torn on whether to include Byleth or not in this – partly because I was unsure whether I’d try my hand at the other Houses as well. In the end, they didn’t make the cut.

After this, I did a ton of experiments for the colour bleeds.

I LOVE how this one was coming together. Unfortunately, I didn’t have enough space on the test paper to continue it. I think I spent the entirety of the rest of this undertaking trying to chase what I’d done in this piece. Argh!

⬆️ Some style experiments.

The paint splatters came out great in the next two.

I think what I didn’t appreciate in my test pieces was how little space there’d be for splatters to not collide in the middle. I then tried to lean into it, placing the eagle logo in the centre where all the colours converged.

There was a lot of time between the test pieces and before I was finally ready to undertake the final piece. I think in the intervening time, I considered doing the entire painting digitally, and experimented with how that would look.

But eventually, I got back on track to do things in watercolour. That didn’t mean throwing out the digital tools! Instead, the composition was drafted digitally for tracing. Of course, it went through a couple iterations too.

I think this tracing has made the sketch feel quite rigid as a result. Byleth was officially excommunicated.

Here was how things were looking after the paint splatters were done. I definitely went into that scared.

Looking at this progress photo, I think I definitely oversaturated the scan. Maybe things could be helped somewhat with a colour retweak… ok, let’s look at these files.

Hang on a moment… what the heck? Looking at the files in my art folder… I already did a re-scan! It’s dated February 2022, about seven months after I originally posted the painting online. But I never posted the rescan? Or at least, not in the Twitter thread. Another reason why using Twitter as a digital archive is a bad idea…Anyhow, here it is. I think there’s some definite improvements in the colours, and it looks like I adjusted some of the skintones. I wasn’t able to fix Dorothea’s dark blotchiness, but at least Petra doesn’t look so pale in comparison. I think one of the issues I had with the original painting was how dark the paper scanned, so when trying to eliminate the paper textures and shadows I ended up really pulling the colours in weird directions.

So I’ll present this version without trying to wash out the background to white. Still not perfect, but an improvement, I think. Maybe I should go in for a third try, sometime…

"Rainbow Eagles" was originally published on Proairesis

[cherokeegal1975]

Manga Demoness...just because I'm bored. Half digital, half traditional.

Mostly I make it a point to keep my posts G Rated. That doesn't mean I'm adverse to doing something more adult. I just don't post it very often. I regard being online as being in a public space and as such, should act accordingly. But once in a great while, I'll bend that rule...well, more frequently when it comes to my novels, but hardly anyone pays attention them anyway...and this is me bending my personal rule. It's sort of like yelling, "Sex!" just to get people's attention.

Most of the time, for reasons I don't understand, I generally tend to draw things that are G Rated because that's where my inspirations take me. But once in a great while, I do something like this or something else that I normally wouldn't show to the public.

This character just appeared in my head and it took me a couple of tries to get her at least almost right and if I ever draw her again, I may start from scratch to see if I can make any improvements. I did do the backdrop in digital, though originally the whole thing was done in pencil and marker. Sometimes my brain can be so random when it comes to subjects to draw.

In my mind, demon's can be evil, but also they can just be tricksters. More like a living or spiritual counter balance to the positive forces in nature. Destructive, yes, but without that balance, the other half of the universe's forces for light, for good or creation can't operate or quite possibly not exist.

My version of demons is a personification of my observations of how nature is possessed of a terrible beauty. Both terrible and beautiful in equal measure. It's a balance. Harmonious, but also brutal and scary too. Likely someone, or many people already come to the same conclusion, but I never talked to anyone else or heard of it anywhere else. I came up with this idea independently.

[cantalouupe]

two is better than one

or; couple fuck in bathroom while thinking about their hot bf - PART 1 OF ?

nsfw!!! childe x f!reader

mentions of poly relationship, implied poly, mentions of kaeya, breeding kink, semi public sex, this will become a series

“God, you’re really getting off on this, arent you?” Fingers dip into your cunt, wetness coating the digits. “You’re soaked, you know.”

Oh, you know. Childe has been extremely clingy, grabbing at you and whispering in your ear all night - how could you not be wet at this point? He’s been talking about taking you apart in the bathroom for the past ten minutes, and only got to this point because you told him that he was too much of a pussy to actually fuck you in here.

You think now, at the telltale sound of a zipper, that he is in fact not too much of a pussy to fuck you here.

You especially think so when he pushes the head of his cock against your dripping hole.

“I would say we should make this quick but we both know we’re going to be in here for a while.”

His hands grip your hips for leverage so he can start thrusting, right after pushing inside. The push against your midsection keeps you pressed against the cool material of the bathroom sink, perfectly bent so the male can have his way with you.

The first few perfunctory movements result in him pulling you up so your back arched against his chest, upper thighs still pressed into the countertop. His arm slung across your torso, right atop your breasts where he count toy with one nipple whilst keeping you in position.

He moves for real, now, unrelenting and rhythmic. Your head hangs forward, mouth agape with whimpered versions of his name.

“It’s good?”

He pinches your nipple hard in between two fingers.

“So good, I’m-“

Being held upright while being fucked has you wanting to collapse, but the limb around you like a harness doesn’t allow for much movement. The way he grinds his cock into your cunt allows you to forget quite quickly.

You push your ass into him, forcing him deeper in every time. Each time your cunt swallows him, your wetness drips all over him, soaking his dick and making him slip in and out smoothly.

“You’re so fucking wet,” he tells you again, retracting his arm from around you. You fall boneless against the sink again and he leans back to watch your hole suck him inside. “Such a sloppy fuck.”

You clench tight and he grins, pulling your cheeks apart ro watch you better.

“It’s such a pretty little cunt, though,” he coos in a familiar tone that has you crying out.

“That’s it, keep taking it.”

“I’ll-“ you struggle with words, stumbling whilst stringing together a sentence. “I need to come.”

Immediately there’s a circling pressure against your clit and you swear. “Fuck, yes yes yes-“

You come in no time, and Childe fucks you through it, only slowing to a stop after he comes and when you wheeze from the extra sensation.

“You finished?” He asks sweetly, caressing the length of your side with wet fingertips.

You nod, pushing yourself up while you wait for him to pull out, except you find yourself being shoved right back down.

“I’m not done.”

“But you-“

“You think it really matters whether or not you’ve came?” He scoffs, “You have gone much longer than this, don’t act like you didn’t know there’d be more.”

He pants out a curse about how good it feels, finding purchase on your waist while he pulls you to meet each thrust.

“You’d be walking out there with my load inside you,” he starts, hips working tirelessly against yours, fucking hard enough that your stomach starts digging into the sink you’re bent over. “But that’s not enough, right? Not enough for either of us.”

A whimper falls from your lips even though you tried to hold them back, and he laughs.

“That’s right. You need more come inside you,” his hand slips down to your thighs, feeling along the wet globs sliding down your damp skin, “and I need to make sure you’re filled to the brim.”

“So full already.” You cry to him; a promise. As if a silly promise that you’re full enough could make him stop. What a naïve thought from you.

Childe just drives home harder, deep presses of his hips that are accompanied by a wet squelch and your moans. You’re tight around him, squeezing still from your last orgasm, the painful overwhelming pleasure from the overstimulation setting in.

“Should have invited Kaeya tonight,” he murmurs, “he’s really into this kind of stuff.”

The mere mention of the flirty blue-haired male has you sucking in a breath. Usually he would be the type to instigate something like this; he could smooth talk you and even Childe into public sex, but alas, he was busy tonight. Maybe Childe was trying to make up for his absence.

Kaeya actually has fucked you in this very bathroom, pressed against the door so that every thrust resulted in a thump that you had been sure could be heard from everyone.

“He’ll be upset when he finds out we did this without him. Are you going to make it up to him when we get home?”

You imagine yourself on your knees in front of the two while Childe describes their fun to Kaeya. He’d fuck your throat for sure; your mouth parts at the idea.

Childe makes a questioning sound at your lack of response, a teasing noise that reminds you of something Kaeya would do. You nod.

“Good girl.”

God, you wish he were here. They’d probably fuck you at the same time, take turns fucking new loads of come into you until you swore your belly was swollen with it.

“Have to keep my come all inside until we get to him, alright? Then you can bend over and show him your ruined hole.” Childe never slows when speaking, not once; you’re close again and he knows it. “He’ll get hard right when he sees it.”

You squeeze around his length, anticipating Kaeya’s touch as if he were here in the room with the two of you.

“You can’t wait, can you? Already thinking about more cock, filthy slut.” He smacks you hard, three hits echoing into the heated room. “You’ll have to be patient, we have a while yet until I’m finished with my turn.”

[naamahdarling]

How did you get into tabletop games? Is Magical Kitties your current favorite?

My sister! My sister had all the 2nd Ed. D&D books and I don't know how much she played or if she simply read them like I did. I had a BIG problem with numbers and with complex rules. I needed (and did until I was about 30, when I finally became confident with basic math*) help with the numbers. I needed to be taught the rules by a person through play. So I kind of went from storytelling by myself or with a couple of friends using what I found there without actually playing, to playing when I found someone (ex husband) who taught me how to actually PLAY. So I played with him as GM, and then in a friend's group, for a while, and eventually tried running things myself and discovered I'm very very good at it. Just not reliable. Couldn't keep up with every week. So I don't GM much.

I have played at least a dozen different systems. All versions of D&D, White Wolf/Storyteller/VtM/Werewolf, Chaosium/Call of Cthulhu/any licensed tie in like Elric or Elfquest, GURPS, FATE, Champions, Star Wars (can't remember the core system, it was a d6 system), several d6 systems I can't remember, and some stuff almost nobody remembers like Arcanum or god save us the very confusing Jorune. Other stuff I have forgotten. At least two entirely homebrew systems. I think my favorite to play was Chaosium with the expanded rules and magic system my ex developed himself. Really fun and was intuitive for me.

But I have RUN five different systems now and like MKSTD best because it is the one that most facilitates the thing I like best about TTRPGs and have most missed about the games I have been playing in for the last mumbleteen years: collaborative storytelling, and unbridled FUN.

Are there rules? Sure, sorta. They're only there as a way to guide the story and challenge players' creativity.

I am a good player and very very good GM in terms of roleplaying. I give my players tons of latitude to interact and explore, and I am fortunate enough to be incredibly fast on my feet so it doesn't matter who they want to talk to or what they want to ask, I don't break stride. I'm not bragging, I say this to highlight the fact that it is very nearly all I am good at. I cannot run combat or design balanced encounters to save my life. With Magical Kitties I actually CAN. It's so simple. And with such a lighthearted subject, plotting is a lot easier. Still, I am approaching the point where the Larger Plot needs to assert itself and I am TERRIFIED because I do not know what is actually causing the big bad problem.

Anyway, yeah, this is pretty amazing for something so silly, and there's no reason the core ideas for the system couldn't be used to approximate any setting or type of character. It doesn't suit some kinds of player, but those are players I don't enjoy running games for anyway (not personally, they're usually lovely, but in terms of play styles not meshing).

I highly recommend it. Silly as it is. Especially if you like cats.

*I have very very bad dyscalculia and adding more than three multiple digit numbers together was for decades a slow process of counting on my fingers and making marks on paper as I went. Around 30, after practice several times a week, I graduated to still being bad at it but at least not needing my fingers, which is where I still am now. I use my phone calculator a LOT, or ask other players for help. Never feel ashamed for being a grown-ass adult who fears subtraction despite people teaching it at you. It says nothing at all about your intelligence. You're fine.

[visd3stele]

Old love, young love, fae love

masterlist;requests

A/N: so, I've posted the unfinished draft by mistake, then panicked and deleted the whole thing... ARGH!

anyway, @fantasyfox10123 requested this:

TW: nothing (notify me if I'm mistaken)

I hope you like this. I tried a simpler prose and I gave it a lighter, easy going tone. Not sure how I feel about it, though...

pics from pinterest,

Jude rubbed circles over the blunt spot of her ring finger with her thumb – where the digit should have been – left hand limp at her side while she hesitated to knock on the door with the right. A couple of days ago, Vivi bursted in the flat they shared, enthusiastically jumping up and down and speaking incoherently. Apparently, the fae found their mortal family, Eva Duarte's parents more specifically. And she wanted to visit.

However, it took some days and several pleads to convince Jude to join her. The sisters fought with each other on the subject many nights in a row, poor Heather having to play peace maker all the time. But in the end, Jude agreed to meet them. If only out of curiosity.

The first time Jude went with Vivi to see their mortal family, the younger sister couldn't stop shock to morph into her features. Eva Duarte's parents lived in a two-levels house, sprinkled with all kind of items from their journeys around the world. After their daughter's passing and grandchildren disappearing, the old couple put all of their hard worked for money into travelling, hoping to soften the claws of pain.

Her mother's parents – her grandparents – were not what she expected. Faeries don't age like mortals do, it can pass decades of centuries until they start to look old. In fact, the only old-looking fae Jude has seen in her entire life was Eldred, the deceased High King. She thought mortals elders must be grim and bitter, weak and meek. Maybe she was influenced by fae folk to think like that, but a short life wasting away as the end approaches, being forced into vulnerability, seemed horrible. The old she met with was anything but.

The woman looked like a wrinkled, happier version of her mother, Jude thought. The same warm, brown eyes and heart shaped face. The same pale skin and large hips. Her hair, grayed from the roots and the extra weight that usually comes with age being the only tells of distinction. The man smiled with his eyes, skin folding at their edges as proof of that. He was taller than his wife and the sisters, his tanned skin clinging to his strong bones and white hair beginning to fall and reveal a bald head. They were both kind and full of life.

As soon as the door opened, Jude found herself engulfed in strong hugs, welcomed in the living room and served with loads of cookies and sweets. Her grandfather was chatty and though he knew Vivi better at this point, he did his best to pull Jude in the conversation. Her grandmother fussed around the whole time, bringing more food, pouring them juices or water, asking if they want anything more.

Jude had to admit to herself she liked her grandparents and soon, she begin visiting them even without Vivi. It was one of those days when she build up the courage to ask about her mother. And surprising her own self, Jude actually enjoyed the story. She felt bitter and sad and confused, but at the end of the day it was like sand has been removed from her throat and now she could breath better. Peacefully.

In return, Jude told them about her twin and father and everything that happened in the past years since Eva's death. Well, as much as she could without betraying Elfhame. For some reason she fought hard against the impulse to mention Cardan. Even though she could easily disguise him in a bully, she felt funny tingles through her body talking about him. And she'd much rather not give the traitorous bastard any more of her time and energy.

The visits went on for weeks. Jude quickly discovered, not without a new found ounce of respect towards her grandparents, that grandma, though kind and generous, radiated confidence and could always offer a good advice. Her grandpa possessed a sharp cunningness and a subtle tongue, able to talk his way around a subject for hours and get people to confess their darker secrets with his easy going attitude.

So it happens that one day, as Vivi was counseled by granny in her relationship with Heather, grandpa managed to find out that Jude has been hurt by a boy. Chaos ensured.

The following visits had been peppered with boys around Jude's age, presented as possible suitors. She tried to tell her grandparents that her heartbreak wasn't of that sort, but it was hard to explain the two clueless mortals that the guy whom she married for political gain (and maybe, maybe, something more) named her the first High Queen of Elfhame only to snatch it away from her within hours. And, to top it all, banished her forever.

So Jude followed through with the set ups: all guys of good families, with a sweet financial condition that her grandparents knew of due to their circle of acquaintances. Unexpectedly, one of them grew on Jude, much to grandma and grandpa excitement. Therefore, the old couple planned a date for Jude and her chosen one.

°•▪︎~▪︎•°

Far away from the residence in Portland, Maine, the king of Elfhame was wide awake in his chambers. The palace drowned in an unnerving silence, making it so that Cardan could hear his thoughts clearly and undisturbed. He despised it!

Little did he knew that worse news were on their way. A tall fae, with bark like skin, bones twisted like the veins of a tree, who spent a lot of time in the mortals woods, caught wind that the former Seneschal is going to have a date. Of course, the fae only meant to bring it up as harmless gossip, searching to make the High King laugh. But it did far more than that.

Cardan wasn't an idiot, despite his habit of getting drunk and making a fool out of himself. He harbored a cunning mind, crafted for schemes and plans, court play and diplomacy rather than strategies for battles and war games. Perhaps this could be the right time to try and get Jude back, then. Because this kind of subtle fights he knew he could win.

It wasn't long until Cardan made it to the mortal land, looking for Jude following the directions the tall fae tipped off. He arrived to a sophisticated looking building, painted wholly in a light grey with big windows to let the sun in. The flat roof presented small rows of what resembled a personal garden.

"Have you tried this number yet?" A feminine voice ringed inside.

"No. Not yet, dear. Give me a second, alright?" The gruff baritone of an older man sounded.

"Well, hurry up, please. The kids are supposed to meet tonight for their first date."

"We should have made the reservation sooner."

"Too late now, dear. Now less complaining and more calling, yes?"

"Whatever you say," the mumble was muffled by a soft whisper: a train of numbers Cardan didn't know what to make of.

He felt hope pump his heart faster. All he understood from the bits he heard was that Jude would have her first date tonight. And it was all Cardan needed to know, it meant he still got time to stop it.

He arranged his burgundy shirt's sleeves, neated his black pants and cleared his throat. Checking again if the spells were all in place to mask his real appearance, he knocked on the door with one swift, elegant movement.

"Hello?" The woman who answered resembled Jude to a great extent. Though her skin was wrinkled and she smiled politely at him. And she also looked to frail to kill him.

"Good day, misses. My name is Cardan, an old... acquaintance of Jude. I have some things I'd like to talk to her about and heard she might be here."

"No, sweetie, she's not. But you can wait for her of you want. Jude indeed is supposed to pass by today."

Cardan smiled to himself as soon as the old lady turned around. Growing in a court as one of the princes, he was taught proper manners, which seemed to captivate the elder mortals so much. Added to his natural charm, the fae could easily entertain an audience and have it wrapped around his little finger if he wanted. The king never bothered before, but for Jude, he can – he would – do it.

"Can I get you anything? A glass of water, perhaps a slice of pie?"

"I am inclined to accept whatever you're so kind to offer. I'm sure whatever it is, it must be a delicacy."

The old lady chuckled and disappeared in the kitchen. Left alone, Cardan shifted from foot to foot. Partly because of nerves and partly because his tail was twitching anxiously tucked under his shirt and it made him uncomfortable.

"Here, darling," the woman placed a stuffed trail on the table and urged Cardan to take a seat. Which he dutifully obeyed. "You're a friend of Jude, then? From school?"

Cardan's fingers picked at his nails over the glass of water before nodding shortly. It wasn't a lie, not really. He knew Jude from school and lately, they became friends of some sort. Before he ruined it. "Has she mentioned me?"

"Oh, Jude is a very secretive child, I'm afraid. She told us a great deal, but it feels like there are yet so many puzzle pieces to fill in the many gaps."

"I'm sure she has her reasons." Jude never does anything without thinking it through in advance.

"Of course! Poor soul, my dear granddaughter. A real fighter she is, isn't she?" The woman let out a soft, fond laugh to herself. But Cardan smirked knowingly. You have no idea, he thought with a warm tug at his heart. A frown took its place soon, though. "She never mentioned mortal relatives," he muttered under his breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing, missis. Just that Jude never brought up her family."

The old woman's features – Jude's grandmother's features, he had to remind himself – soured. Before she could give her words sound, however, the man whose voice Cardan heard earlier, entered the room.

"I'm sorry, dear. It's busy everywhere. People must make the best out of the weekend, huh?" He leaned to prickle at the pie's crust when his eyes lit up with recognition, as if only now becoming aware of someone else's presence. "And who must you be, hm?"

"My name is Cardan, sir. Pleasure to make your acquaintance." He jumped to his feet and extended a hand to the mortal man – Jude's grandfather.

"He's a friend of Jude, dear," the woman sufficed when her husband gave her a confused look over his shoulder while shacking Cardan's hand.

"Ah, yes. Good. Nice to meet you as well, young man." Silence fell over the three of them as the old man seated himself next to his wife. Several minutes passed until the woman spoke again, clasping her husbands hands in hers.

"Maybe of we offer a better deal? We could spare some cash for an advance... maybe even a donation, or a sponsorship. Anything, to get Jude a perfect first date, don't you think?"

The words sparked Cardan's interest. For they opened him a door to impress the pair obviously in charge with Jude's love life.

He cleared his throat and set down the glass. "I think I may be able to help with your problem." That got the old couple's attention right away. Cardan pondered if he should apologize for eavesdropping, but it'd be too much of a stretch of the fae rules. And besides, they were talking loudly and just so near him, it would've been impossible not to listen in.

"I know Jude from quite some time now and I don't think she'd fancy a sophisticated dinner." Of course she wouldn't. The fierce warrior looses her patience around elegancy and finery – such a waste of time and resources. The brave spy values her secrets too much to sit in place and have a casual conversation – about herself no less. The sly queen, who spent years ignoring her heart and building a plank bridge between it and her mind, could never feel comfortable in a romantic setting – with a stranger too! – deeming it slightly unimportant. Perhaps even using it as a tactic to read the enemy. But Jude wouldn't simply relax and allow herself a nice time without a specific purpose.

Or so Cardan hoped. Because he wouldn't know what he'd do if he were wrong. If in the months of separation, his High Queen became a plain mortal girl who'd be desperate to please him and the folk.

His heart accelerated in urgency, his palms wettened with sweat and his tail swinged painfully against his back. Cardan resisted the urge to pass a hand through his black curls and instead, he shoot to his feet. The new position would allow him to gesture largely and speak down to his audience – which boosted his confidence enough to permit his deepest hidden fantasies to come to life before Jude's grandparents eyes.

"She should be taken to a picnic," he said, thinking about how he'd fill a basket with the most delicious treats stolen from the royal kitchens and take Jude to the forest entry, near the place he threw mud at her meal. He'd apologize and accept whatever punishment she'd set, including eating dirt himself, and he'd built a new memory for her in that spot. A better one. "Somewhere with significance, of great meaning. Somewhere she'd recognize and form a deeper connection with. But not near water," he fought a shudder when the days and nights of Jude's imprisonment under the sea caught up with him. The sight of his powerful, unbreakable Jude, shaking on her feet, drained, hurt and almost past recognition plagued his nightmares. Even more so now, when Cardan couldn't see her every day to make sure she's really fine.

"There shouldn't be a lot of people around, but close enough to the town," so she would feel secure and safe within known territory, but not observed and judged, the High King pointed in his mind. "And he shouldn't press for anything. Let her take the lead, be in control." Cardan understood Jude's need of feeling like no one dictates her. After she had events thrown at her her entire life and no way of fighting them, the High Queen had to choose for herself.

He was about to suggest some things that could break the ice, but the amazed look in both the old lady's and old man's eyes put a stop to his train of thoughts. The woman looked at him with new warmth in her eyes. Het lips were spreaded in a adoring smile, her nose scrunched up and brows lightly furrowed near the nose's bridge. As if she saw a cute kitten mewing softly after a long nap. The man had a knowing gaze lit his eyes, the smile playful, understanding and pleased. He relaxed slightly in his sit and Cardan caught a quick lift of his brows. As if he has been surprised in a good way.

For the first time since the king of Elfhame walked through their door, Jude's grandparents seemed to truly see him. In fact, they examined it, watching the silver and obsidian earrings that garnished his momentarily soft-edged ears, his heavy rings and shiny boots. His perfect posture, though a bit damaged by dramatic flair and perfectly ironed clothes (a careful, hard work worth a great payment, no doubt. Even if Cardan wore the top halfway through unbuttoned). They thought back to his speech, the clear pronunciation of every vowel and consonant, and composed manners (blissfully unaware of how his tongue ties and stumbles over itself when he drinks and how he never bothers to remember any of his finishing schooling most of the times). Yes, he seemed a better suitor for their Jude than the one they picked already.

"Maybe we should give the boy a call and bring the situation to his attention. After all, if everywhere is busy, the date can't happen." The grandfather suggested, his words apologetical, but his tone telling Cardan he wasn't sorry at all. The king had to hid his face in his shoulder to sniffle a triumphant humph.

"Oh, yes, my dear. It would be very rude indeed on our behalf to not inform the poor boy of the misfortune." The grandmother approved. "Cardan, honey, would you like to stay for dinner? I think I heard Vivi's car already. She and Jude will be joining, of course. I don't suppose you mind."

"Not at all, missis. I'd be delighted." This time a smirk brightened Cardan's face as he followed the pair to the dining room, waiting for the Duarte sisters. Maybe Jude won't be happy to see him right away, maybe she won't want to talk to him, or listen to his prayers yet. But at least he won over the matchmakers and bought himself some time. In the end, Cardan Greenbriar will succeed in bringing his wife back home. He could feel it in his guts.

A/N: I am actually quite content with how this turned out after all. I'd like to keep it like this, so there won't be a part two. Thank you for reading ;)

[ottspot]

My First Impressions of Metroid Prime Remastered... Way Better Than I Thought!

It's been over 20 years since Metroid Prime originally released on the Nintendo GameCube, and many will argue that it's one of the best games ever made. Its focus on exploration, fights, and scanning features combined with the classic Metroid formula definitely makes it a game worthy of that title. It was way ahead of its time.

But its time has come once again! Metroid Prime has been faithfully remastered for the Nintendo Switch with new controls and visuals- and extra features I didn't expect! What do I think after sinking a few hours into it? Read on and I'd be delighted to share!

My story with Metroid Prime goes on quite a few years, and it all started when I was living in my old neighborhood as a kid. The Metroid Prime Trilogy game was always that one strange Wii game my neighbors had. Whenever I saw it, it stuck out amongst the other white cases, notably because it had a Steelbook case. I had played Echoes' multiplayer mode with friends while sleeping over, but that was really it. That is, until I was able to get the game. The neighbors' father had given it to me after they got rid of their Wii system. My mom insisted on paying, but he was kind enough to let me keep it for free.

Alas... as much as I liked the game, I never got too invested. I would always play a couple of hours of the first game, get lost, then stop. I would pick it back up some months later but I wouldn't be able to figure out where I was and where I had to go. It was a shame, as I really liked the controls on the Wii, and I was still interested in the series. I even tried the GameCube version when I got my copy of that, but that didn't help at all, especially with those controls.

Fast forward to these modern times though, and I now own the first game once again on my Switch. I chose to get it digitally, as I didn't want to wait to get the physical copy. And let me tell you... I already had high hopes from what I read about this remaster before, but this still blew me away.

This is a complete graphical overhaul of that original 2002 game, with incredible lighting and textures that I haven't even seen before on a Switch game. And it achieves this without even dipping to 720p or below. It's easily the best-looking Switch game I've ever played. It even feels great to play, too.

For those unaware, Metroid Prime is a first-person shooter/exploration game similar to the other 2D-style games in the franchise. You search a world for suit upgrades while fighting enemies, and each upgrade can allow you to explore a new area. And if you're a bit stuck, just backtrack- there's surely somewhere new you can go to with all those new upgrades. Never think you're done with one area just because you moved on to the next. Scanning enemies for their weaknesses is also a big key factor in this game, and necessary for 100% completion.

There are several ways to play this game now, controls-wise. There are options to go for the classic GameCube-style controls and Wii pointer controls, but now for the first time- you can officially play Metroid Prime in true dual-stick first person shooter fashion. Playing that way with the lock-on ability is a bit broken, but it's the most comfortable way for me to play this game. It was the one thing holding me back from continuing on the Wii (well, that and I just keep forgetting), and now that problem just isn't there.

Metroid Prime Remastered has a few new features and options that I wasn't entirely expecting, either. In the main menu, you're able to view models of enemies and suits and listen to songs from the game, how much is depending on how far you've gotten in it. Something I had no idea would be included at all was the European and Japanese-exclusive narration for certain scenes. These were entirely new to me, and I completely forgot they existed until now. Upon starting my playthrough, I decided to opt for the European narration. From my understanding, it's only in the beginning and end of the game, but from what I heard when I started, it's that perfect early-2000s action movie narration. Cheesy, but very cool.

One thing I did notice, as many others have, is that the bonuses from linking Metroid Fusion have been removed. In the GameCube original, if you linked your copy of Fusion with a Game Boy Advance/GameCube link cable, you could unlock the Fusion Suit (if you beat Prime) and a playable version of the original Metroid (if you beat Fusion). The latter being taken out makes sense, it's literally on the NES Switch Online app, but the Fusion suit would have been a nice inclusion still. Oh well, maybe when Fusion gets added to the GBA app or something.

At the end of the day though, Fusion suit or not, this is still one incredible game. This will definitely hold fans over until Metroid Prime 4 releases. Here's hoping that a remaster of 2 and 3 are in the works- and will be as good as this one.

Thanks again for reading! Been putting this off for a bit, but I'm glad I finished it now.

Next up: Remasters Shouldn't Be Lazy, Broken Ports! Why Have So Many Been Like This?

[buckyownsmylife]

Replaying - Jake Gyllenhaal/Reader (ft. Tom Holland) smut

The one where you share a night with Jake after Tom admits one of his kinks to you.

Warnings: cuckoldery, reader doesn’t think jake would respect her lack of consent, but she doesn’t actually safeword, so kinda dubcon?, you decide, definitely rough, use of the word whore, forced orgasms at some point, talk of anal

A/N: this is an one-shot depicting what happened between the reader and Jake like she told Tom about in in my fic “Do it”. I’d been meaning to write it ever since that first one came out, but a request gave me the push I needed to actually get this out. I’m very proud of this one.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

My heart was pounding against my chest as I made my way to Jake’s front door, hesitation for a bit before knocking. You’re doing this for Tom, you reminded yourself. He wants this. You’re not doing anything wrong. 

And as much as I kept repeating that to myself, those few seconds that took before Jake welcomed me into his home made me second guess everything, from what I was wearing to the strength of my relationship with my boyfriend. 

And God, I hated it. I hated it because I loved Tom, with every fiber of my being. I would never cheat on him, and I would never come close to doing anything like this if it weren’t for his admission of his own desires.

But now that it was here, out in the open, and *I was here, naked under Jake’s burning stare, I couldn’t deny that I wanted this. Fuck, I wanted this. And I was terrified of this feeling, terrified of what it could mean for my future with Tom.

I was going to do this, though. There was no doubt about it.

I thought Jake would try to ease me into this, offer me a glass of wine to settle my nerves or whatever, but the second his eyes met mine after they ran over my body, he pounced. “Fuck, I’ve been wanting you for so long.”

I moaned against his mouth as he dragged me through his house, his hands making quick work of my dress before manhandling me over his shoulder. The pure show of strength and animalistic behavior was enough to have me creaming my pants, and he must have noticed, if his chuckle was any indication.

“You’re such a horny little girl, aren’t you, sweetheart? There’s no way Tom knows how to treat you the way that you need to be treated. But that’s alright. I’m here now, and I’m gonna take good care of you.” As soon as he had me on the bed, he was all over me again, sucking bruises and leaving bite marks all over my skin. It was clear that he was the possessive type, and the fact that I was actually Tom’s didn’t really mean anything to him.

Little by little, he sucked a trail of lovebites from my neck, to my stomach, going over my chest, until he reached my underwear, where he finally stopped to look up at me. “I can’t wait to taste this little pussy.” In a second, I was completely nude before his eyes, and he rose to his feet to stare down at me, most likely reveling in the marks he had left me with.

The intensity of his gaze was so powerful that it intimidated me, forcing me to remember just exactly what I was doing, instead of simply losing myself in the moment, like I’d managed to do when I actually had his touch on me. So before I could even realize it, I was covering myself up, crossing my legs so he couldn’t really see the parts of me that he was interested in right now.

I don’t think Jake liked that. He raised an eyebrow, a hand covering the enormous bulge that had me salivating, probably in an effort to get some relief to his hardness, before he threatened, “Be a good girl and spread your legs for me, or you won’t like what I’ll do next. Tom has spoken so highly of you, I don’t think you want to disappoint me.”

I hesitated for a bit, but something in his eyes warned me not to get on his bad side. However, it seemed like I wasn’t quick enough to satisfy his wishes, because he pulled me by ankle to the edge of the bed, before turning me around until my head was hanging off of it.

“Fine. I know you want to be fucked like a whore anyway.” Without any sort of prelude whatsoever, he grabbed my cheeks, burying his fingers in the flesh to force me to pucker my lips, before feeding me his cock with his other hand. “Here, suck on this. I really want to hear you gagging around my cock.”

And that was all the preamble I got before he suffocated me with his dick, cutting off my breathing as he thrusted roughly in and out of my throat, directly. In no time at all, I was a mess of tears and spit, and while I was sure that the image couldn’t be all that attractive, still Jake didn’t seem to mind at all.

Jake’s P.O.V.

I don’t think I’d ever been this hard in my entire life. It meant that I was barely hanging on to my already diminished control, but who could really blame me when I had this fucking woman for me to do as I pleased?

When I finally pulled away to let her catch her breath, she coughed and sputtered desperately, hands trying to hold my hips so I would give her more time to breathe. “Please,” she babbled, voice hoarse and fucked out, immediately provoking a smug smirk to rise on my lips. “Please, be more gentle.”

I had to coo at how cute she was. Holding her hair back so I could run a single finger across her face, I buried it on her lips like I’d done with my cock before leaning over to remind her, “You’re mine tonight, princess. I’ll do whatever the fuck I want to you.” And then I pried her lips open, spitting in them before filling her mouth with my cock once more.

“Damn, all those times I thought about bending you over a table and fucking you right in front of your boyfriend, I have to say… I’m not even in your pussy yet and you’re already much better than I imagined.” I thrust in and out of her mouth a couple more times, relishing in the choking and the tears until I could feel my balls threatening to release inside of her warm mouth, and that simply wouldn’t do. The only place I’d be cumming tonight would be inside of her pussy.

So I allowed her some time to recollect as I slowly rounded the bed until I was standing in front of her pussy. “You know, you had a much harder time taking my cock in your mouth than I expected you to. I didn’t take Tom for having such a tiny cock.”

Even if I was exaggerating, I could see by the guilty look on her face that he was significantly smaller than me. It only added up to make me feel even hornier, that much more determined to give her the pounding of a lifetime.

“You did a good job sucking my cock, sweetheart. Now let me see this pussy.” Kneeling in front of my bed, I pulled her by her ankle so her legs were dangling off of it before I positioned her feet on the mattress, spreading her open to me. “Fuck yes. This is a pretty pussy.”

I was almost clinical in my exploration of her hole, starting by slowly running my fingers up and down her lips, making sure to spread her juices all over them before spitting on her cunt and spreading that all over the perfect sight. 

“Hmm, yes… You look delicious.” I leaned down to give both me and her a little teasing taste by very quickly running my tongue on her clit, but immediately had to come back for seconds.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

“Damn, you’re sweet.” I didn’t know what to do, it was impossible to figure out a way to behave properly while Jake fucking Gyllenhaal was lapping my pussy like it was his last meal on Earth. Every moan that escaped my lips felt like a betrayal to Tom, even though it didn’t make any sense.

“Stop that.” The man that right now seemed more animal than human called my attention with a loud slap over my weeping cunt, breaking the dam with which I had tried to contain my sounds of pleasure. “I want to know just how thoroughly I’m ruining you.”

I’d never make it out of here alive, I thought. At the very least, I knew I wouldn’t leave this bedroom the same woman I’d been once I stepped inside of it, but instead of fear, all I felt was the familiar rising wave of pleasure and the unknown curiosity of knowing more about this new version of me. The one that knew what it felt like to be touched by my boyfriend’s best friend.

A single finger penetrated me, the same systematic approach of exploration was applied as Jake slowly and carefully got to know my insides, looking for what made me tick and what helped him in his task to destroy me. When I clenched around his digit, I felt his grin against my pussy, his smugness at having found that sweet spot that was once only reserved for Tom and Tom only.

“Wanna see you cum now, pretty baby,” he teased, the vibrations of his words only adding to the efficacy of his plan. “Cum all over my fingers, angel. Want to see you breaking apart for me.”

The use of such sweet nicknames when I already knew he was nothing but a rough lover only added to the fire that had been lit in the pit of my stomach. The feeling of being powerless, abandoned in the hands of a man who didn’t seem to know mercy was what brought me to my first orgasm of the night. Flashbacks to just how out of breath I’d been only minutes before, the panic when I realized he wouldn’t pull back. For a moment,  I honestly didn’t know if he would respect my use of the safeword he and Tom had agreed upon beforehand, and that was the thought that brought me to a messy, relieving release.

“There you go. So sweet and wet, you dirty, dirty girl.” I knew I tried to respond and it only came out in some sort of broken sound, but I didn’t recognize it as a whine until I felt another slap over my pussy, startling me.

“Don’t whine,” he ordered, and I could see that dangerous glint in his eye that electrified to my very core. “Whiny babies get punished, angel. Do you want to be punished?” As much as the very thought of what Jake could have in store for me had my pussy clenching, I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle it, at least not tonight, not after the amount of anticipation that I’d built even before I walked into his house.

Jake’s P.O.V.

I smiled as she shook her head emphatically, arms and legs wrapping around my body as she tried to cling to me, stopping me from performing what she thought I intended to do. “No, no, please. I-I need you.”

Shit. Hearing her admit her desire for me had my cock twitching, precum undoubtedly starting to drip from the throbbing head. Still, I had enough control left in me to remember that I needed to prepare her first. I needed her to be ready for me, so I could truly give her the pleasure that she deserved.

“Not yet, sweetheart.” I forced another finger inside of her, groaning to myself at just how tight she felt, wanting to stretch her open with my cock, feel her struggling to take it, but knowing it wouldn’t be right. She hadn’t agreed to be mine, she wasn’t prepared to deal with everything I was as a lover.

“I need to open you up for me, yeah?” I was breathing hard, trying to restrain myself as I watched her pussy swallow my fingers eagerly, releasing more and more of her sweetness to help ease the stretch. “Have to make you cum again, baby. Can you do that for me?”

The sight of her shaking her head had anger rousing inside of me. Here I was struggling to make this easy on her, and she just couldn’t help me on that gradually more and more herculean task.

“Oh, but you are going to do just that. And you’re going to like it, *angel.” Deciding that the best way to get through this torture was to get her to cum quickly, with the added bonus that it would serve as a punishment too, I started to fuck her with my fingers faster and faster, making sure to curve my digits just right so I would hit that particular spot every damn time.

“Yes, see? This is what you get for misbehaving. You’re gonna cum all over my fingers, and you’re gonna pay for each damn time you made me want to have my cock inside this pretty little pussy and had to resort to fuck some other woman instead. “C’mon. You can’t pretend you don’t want to cum and keep moaning like a whore. Cum right now,” I urged her orgasm until I felt it, her channel clenching around my fingers and making me groan again.

I didn’t stop moving them though, instead opting to squeeze a third one, so I could finally have my cock inside of her in only a few seconds. “P-Please,” she started begging, tiny hands circling my wrist in an effort to pry me away from her, and I had to coo at how adorable she was.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. You can handle one more. C’mon. It’ll be so worth it when I finally get my cock inside of you. I’m only doing this to help open you up, baby.” She was sobbing now, pretty body twisting and trying to get away from the pleasure that was clearly becoming too much for her.

Leaning down to cover her body with mine, I nibbled on her jaw before licking her slightly open lips. “Kiss me, Y/N. It’ll help distract you. Kiss me.” I probably didn’t need to repeat it, because as soon as I finished breathing out the words, her lips were on mine, hands losing themselves in my locks in an effort to leave me be inside of her pussy.

Y/N’s P.O.V.

I immersed myself in his kiss, desperate to find something to distract me from the incessant dragging of his fingers against my walls, the squelching sounds of my sopping wetness simultaneously embarrassing and arousing me. Damn him and his sexual appeal. It didn’t take him long at all to have me trembling because of his three fingers, desperate to cum yet again.

“See? I knew you could handle it.” There was a smug smirk on his face that I wanted to wipe, but the only way I could do that now was by kissing him again. I had no idea how he knew my body that well, despite never having touched it again. Not even I believed I was able to cum another time, and still, here I was eager to finally have his member inside of me.

At long last, his fingers came out, being promptly wrapped by his beautiful lips before he looked down at me with that same stupid smirk. “Are you ready, pretty girl?” I could only nod, watching enraptured as he slowly jerked off to the sight of my already ruined body, but I should have known that wouldn’t be enough.

“Say it,” he ordered, knowing fully well exactly how wrecked I was. “Say you want my cock inside of your pretty little pussy.” I stopped a whine just before it managed to erupt from my chest, panting wildly as I stared up at this dark angel that looked so determined to destroy me for anyone else.

“I want you inside of me,” I murmured, instantly knowing it still wouldn’t be enough. He was rubbing the head of his member over my dripping lower lips, and at the sound of my compliance, a slap echoed around the room, leaving my thigh tingling - surely with a hand-shaped bruise behind.

“Louder.” My cunted pulsed with the need to be filled, so much so that it didn’t take any time at all to get me to repeat the same words I’d just uttered, in a louder, much more desperate tone. My reward was immediate. Jake filled me slowly but surely, only stopping once he had completely bottomed out inside of me, and I had to focus on my own breathing or I was sure I’d forget to inhale and exhale as I struggled to accept his cock in my already stretched out hole. 

He was right. I would never have been able to take his cock if he hadn’t taken the time to ease me, opening me up with his fingers. The comparison was *right there, it was impossible to ignore. Still, I tried to distract myself, focusing instead on the feeling of Jake’s beard as he nibbled on my jaw, waiting for me to adjust to him.

“So many times you teased me, with those short pretty dresses and cute little smiles, and now I finally have you right here where I want you.” He hid his head on the crook of my neck, just the way Tom usually did, and instinctively, I laced my fingers over some of his locks, just like I usually did with my boyfriend. “You know what, angel? I think I might just keep you.”

I couldn’t really focus on what he was saying, and I knew it wouldn’t do me any good either. There was some comfort in thinking that he only wanted me for my body, that’s what I knew and that’s what I wanted to focus on.

At the first snap of his hips, a whimper escaped my lips, still unable to relax so it wouldn’t hurt. Jake only chuckled, brushing away a few strands of untamed hair that covered my face before kissing my lips briefly. “Don’t worry, sweetheart. I’m gonna fuck the pain away, you’ll see.”

Regardless of the discomfort, I savored each and every thrust of his member inside my walls, holding tightly to his shoulders as I prayed - for what, I had no idea. I wanted this to be over just as much as I wanted to cherish every second of it, if only for the memories I’d get to recount to my boyfriend when it was all over.

Almost as if he was reading my mind, Jake spoke on that moment, “Wouldn’t it be hot if Tom was here to watch me fucking you?” That was a thought my brain could process, and it made me come that much closer to cumming all around Jake’s cock. “I bet you wanted him to be here, so he could see just how good I’m fucking you.”

A particular thrust of his hips had him finally hitting that spot that had me melting underneath him, releasing his shoulder in order to find hold in the tangled sheets of the bed. “God, I can’t believe he’d let you out of his sight for only a second, much less that he let me fuck you.”

His words were only murmurs pressed against my skin, accompanied by licks and bites all over the already bruised skin of my chest, but I heard every single word, questioning just how much kinker this man could get.

“I’d make you beg for my cock right in front of him, baby. I’d make you cry for it while he was watching, make you forget you even belong to him.” There was a pause then, when he finally looked up from my glistening skin, covered in his saliva, to meet my eyes. “I’m gonna do that now.” 

That was his warning as he picked up the pace, keeping eye contact that I desperately wanted to break, but found myself unable to. He was like a force field in himself. Magnetic, inescapable. When he said he would ruin my innocence for Tom, I had no doubts about it.

Each thrust of his hips revealed parts of myself I was unaware of before, parts I was unsure I wanted to recognize as being mine, anyway. And in the midst of this tug of war between head and heart, I was growing more desperate to cum with each passing second, suffocated by the weight of Jake’s body on top of me, his muscles locking me under his control.

When it was impossible to hold it in anymore, I expected to be able to bring him down into the depths of pleasure with me, but I should have known better. While I reveled in the aftershocks of yet another orgasm, body laying heavy and without response on the bed, he just groaned and kept fucking me, like he was would never be able to forgive himself if he wasn’t able to keep going.

“Swear to God… I’ve never had a better pussy in my entire life.” The filthiness of his words surprisingly added to the sensations of my own afterglow, making my pussy even wetter - and I knew he could feel it, especially by the growl that escaped his chest. “Yeah, you like knowing that, huh? You like knowing I’ve fucked a shit ton of women and still your pussy is the tightest, wettest, warmest pussy I’ve ever had.”

I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t feel as aroused by him comparing me to other women, or the thought of him with other women, but I did. Maybe it was because he wasn’t mine, and I knew he never would be. I was okay with that - Tom was all I wanted. But knowing that the memories of what we shared would haunt him way after he was thorough with me gave me some spiteful sense of pride, and I just couldn’t deny it.

“What about me, huh? What about my cock? Do you like it? Do you like the way it’s splitting you open, making you cream around me? Tell me, angel. Tell me how good I make you feel.”

Jake’s P.O.V.

I could see that the overstimulation was getting to her now, and she relented, telling me exactly what I longed to hear, probably in need to distract herself from how raw her pussy was feeling now.

“I-It feels s-so good…” I had to bite back a grin at the admission, knowing how much it cost her to let it out, but also aware that she needed to completely let go in order to fully enjoy this the way that she deserved to.

“Are you gonna tell him? How it felt to have my big cock inside of you? Are you gonna think about it while you fuck him?” The thought of Tom had her moaning more loudly, more easily close to letting go of the control she still held so tightly to her chest.

“Come here, sweetheart. I think it’s time you ride me.” I inverted our positions so that she was the one on top now, letting my body rest on the headboard so I could still keep a tight grip on her hips.

I was so fucking close, I craved to reach my high and I knew that she was aware of it. It was clear in the way I couldn’t let her do her job, instead fucking myself up against her, desperate to cum. And the sight of her breasts right in front of me only added to the fire in my lower belly, growls and groans escaping me the more I forced her to quicken her movements.

“I’m going to give you something…” I started right when I felt that delicious sensation taking over my body, spreading through every single part of me. “A gift so you can give to Tom.”

I could see that she was puzzled, but right then my orgasm hit me, making me spill ropes upon ropes of cum into her tight, delicious pussy. Surprisingly, the feeling had her sighing and curling up against me, like she knew that this meant we were through, and she could finally relax.

I chuckled, squeezing her ass as I milked my own orgasm, making sure every single drop was inside of her, before slapping one of the cheeks. “Keep it in,” I ordered, and I knew she was aware of what I was talking about. “He’ll love it. Just like you loved to take me in your pretty little hole. Didn’t you?”

Instead of answering, she just hid her head in the crook of my neck, making me chuckle loudly. How adorable. I’d just fucked her silly, and she still felt embarrassed about something so natural.

In the quiet of night, as I waited for both of our breathing patterns to come back to normal, I absentmindedly traced shapes against her back, thinking about how in a few minutes she’d be out the door and back in her boyfriend’s arms and I would go to sleep alone. Like I always did. And because my mind knew well enough that I wouldn’t handle being vulnerable in front of her, my hand ended up between the cheeks of her ass, right where I hadn’t had the chance to explore.

“Tell me, beautiful,” I broke the silence, kissing her shoulder to relax her when her muscles tensed after I circled her puckered hole. “Did he ever fuck this ass? I bet I could fill this little hole real good, too.”

Y/N’s P.O.V.

Just the thought of having him like that had me clenching around his member again. It wasn’t necessarily a scary thought - I was more afraid of how arousing the mental image got me, especially since I hadn’t had the chance to explore that with Tom just yet.

Before I had the chance to explain there was no way in hell I’d be losing my ass virginity to him, he laughed, slapping my butt lightly again, before clarifying, “Don’t worry, angel. I’m not going to overstep my welcome. Besides, it’d take too much time to get my dick inside of you, I’d never be able to stop myself from cumming too soon.”

I didn’t know what to say, so I opted to just nod before I managed to slowly gather my strength to finally climb down from his lap. I bit my lip to stifle the groan that threatened to erupt from my chest at the feeling of being so empty after being so thoroughly fucked, but the second I was away from him, his hand fell down on my ass once more, his face taken by a boyish grin when I turned around to stare at him.

“Maybe next time.” It took me a while to understand he was still referring to anal sex, and when I did, I felt my face burn at all the implications of that statement. “I trust you’ll think of me if you and Tom ever decide to open the relationship to embrace someone else in the mix.”

Now that was unexpected, and yet again, there was nothing I could say, so I just silently gathered my stuff - annoyingly conscious of the little souvenir he’d left me to carry with me back to the house - while he located some sweatpants and followed me downstairs. 

“Bye.” It felt weird saying just that to wrap up everything that had happened between us ever since I stepped foot into this house, only a few hours earlier, but what else was there to say? Of course, Jake had a different opinion, and that became clear with the parting words he left me to ponder as I sat alone, sore and dirty on the taxi ride back to my house.

“Goodbye, sweetheart. Rest assured, everytime your eye meets mine while we’re out in public, I’ll be thinking about how it felt to be balls deep into you. I hope you’ll be thinking about me too. Maybe then you won’t tease me so much.”

[stxleslyds]

MY TOUGHTS ON THE END OF RED HOOD BY CHIP ZDARSKY.

Dishonour! Dishonour on you, dishonour on your cow! 

Well Jason Nation, it happened again, fanon wins over canon. The amount of bullshit that DC made Zdarsky write in this issue is insane, I have never seen this many fanfiction tropes shoved in a single issue in my life.

This book has been a constant insult to Jason’s character and his Red Hood “persona” since the very first issue but I never thought it would end this badly. It’s incredibly sad.

I will go ahead and say it, this tumblr and this post is not “Batfamily” friendly and it definitely isn’t fanon friendly when it comes to Jason Todd.

Fanon is destroying canon for Jason Todd. I am sorry but that’s how I see it, fanon doesn’t belong in canon, I would never get tired of saying that. But here is the thing, DC latches on to Jason’s fanon version because it fits their narrative of “the Batman is all that is right and all must follow his rules or they shall disappear”.

DC has been dying to make Jason bland and flavourless just like Batman. And now here it finally is.

Let’s be honest the story in this book, the new drug, Cheer, Tyler and his mom, none of that shaped this story, none of those things were the support beams for it. It was all about this never ending “daddy issues” thing that DC pretends is going on between Jason and Bruce.

It was all about those two fighting because they “think differently” so in the end they can push Jason towards the “no killing rule” being also the Red Hood’s modus operandi.

Its utter bullshit.

From the moment that Jason had to put a bat suit on I knew that this was going to be a mess. Luckily like I predicted they didn’t make a big deal out of him wearing it but the “Jason admires Batman” feeling was very present in the issue.

I will not talk about how easy it was for that one thug to land a punch on Jason while he was distracted and I will also not talk about Jason being a dumbass for not securing his dumb mask better when he knew the fight will involve gases. I will not talk about it.

Anyway, let’s talk about the Cheer Gas induced illusion, shall we?

In Jason’s illusion he finds Bruce at the manor looking at the picture of Joker’s death (?) and even though that is strange what Bruce says next is even weirder, he says this: “I did it. He was the last one, but I did it…Joker is dead. I am done.”

Now what the hell was that? This is Jason’s illusion, and by the looks of it in his illusion Bruce has killed every baddie in Gotham and left the Joker for last? Am I reading that right? Is this this a joke?

I understand that this is an illusion so the gas is making “real” things that Jason probably doesn’t know he wants, like wanting Bruce to go on a killing spree, which Jason never wanted because he said it himself, do you guys remember the iconic “I’m not talking about killing Cobblepot and Scarecrow or Clayface. Not Riddler or Dent…I’m talking about HIM. Just him.” Because I remember and it’s so important to Jason’s character, Jason never wanted Bruce to go on a killing spree, he wanted Bruce to kill the clown who had killed him when he was only fifteen. Is that so hard to remember DC?

And then it gets worse! Since WHEN has Jason wanted a perfect family life with the people that he has tried to kill, harm or looked down to? Why is “being with a bunch of people who NEVER get together for anything other than “help” the Bat in a fight against a fucking clown” the idea of happiness to Jason? Has this man ever interacted with any of these people in a positive way without the intrusion of a Batman/Robin event in the way? I will give you the answer, it’s no, the answer is no.

Jason Todd doesn’t care for your “Batfamily” bullshit DC, why would it matter to him? Because he was Robin? He was killed by the Joker when he was Robin, and he was killed because the man in charge of him didn’t pay enough attention! Jason Todd who was written as Dick Grayson’s number one hater for so long (and fandom loves that) is now having an illusion where he enjoys happy times with him along the others? Cass and Stephanie? What? Am I missing something, is this actually AO3, is this fanfiction?

I think Zdarsky got confused, this illusion is what would happen if Jason were dosed with fear gas. That must be it, I solved it everyone! Zdarsky just got confused by his own writing!

I wish.

Let’s go back to the sad reality, Jason has a moment in which he actually puts all his training in motion and shakes of the gas’s grasp on him. He does that but he is grabbed by so many people (who are this people?) and he is unarmed and I believe that’s the only reason why Cheer is still alive after saying that he has someone in Tyler’s mom’s hospital room ready to kill her if he doesn’t join him.

(If this were the real Jason, Cheer would have dropped dead instantly.)

But this is not the real Jason and this is not a *real* comic, it’s fanfiction! So just like that time in Batman #100 when Dick was fighting alone as Nightwing (for the first time since his “family” left him alone after losing his memories) the rest of the “family” shows up to fight Cheer and four random thugs.

Yep, its like the MCU had considered having Cap say “Avengers Assemble” when they were fighting a couple of robots instead of Thanos.

What a mess.

Also having Jason say, in real life (not illusion world), “You know what happiness is? It’s knowing that others have your back.” about this group of people is the perfect recipe for a big OOC moment for absolutely everyone. I cannot believe they have dragged Jason back to this awful concept and that they have sank him so low. It’s quite honestly, disgusting.

But the horrors don’t end there, we have a wonderful moment after Jason gives Batman the antidote, Jason stops Batman from punching the living shit out of Cheer. Because I am not stupid. There is no way in the world that you can convince me that Jason just stopped Batman from killing Cheer.

How incredibly delusional do you have to be to write Batman finally killing someone and that someone being Cheer, a guy that was introduced to comics two months ago?

Yes, later its said that between the gas and the antidote Bruce was a little too crazy and couldn’t help himself BUT I call bullshit once more, because Bruce has gone completely bat-shit-crazy on people before! I remember two recent instances in which that happened. Batman #57 in which Bruce beats the living shit out of KGBeast after he shot Dick. And the other one is Batman beating up Jason more brutally than he ever beat up Joker in RHatO #25.

DC cannot fuck with me. I might has bought this digital comic for 8 dollars but I am not buying that bullshit.

ALSO, there was no need for Zdarsky to do Jason as dirty as he did him when he made him say: “If you are going to come down from mount judgement to MY level for once… he’s not the guy to do it for.”

Zdarsky, why did you write a Red Hood story when you hate Red Hood? Couldn’t you have just told DC that you wanted to write a love letter to Batman? Once again, I am reading a Red Hood story for RED HOOD content not Batman content. Is it really that hard? I bet that if Zdarsky had asked DC to let him write a Batman story they would have said yes, there are like 20 Batman stories, they wouldn’t say no to one more!

Can you tell I am mad? And salty?

This post is so long and so full of anger, I am truly sorry for that but I have to write these feelings down or I would explode. And I am not even done, our suffering, Jason Nation, continues.

But first a little break from the pain, Tyler. Thank you after all the pain this book has given me Tyler is back and just like I predicted his mom is fine and he will stay with her, they both have been given a place and money to rebuild their life (not given by Jason nor Dick but I was close enough). The only happy ending that Tyler could have, he had and I am thankful for that, we even got a little adorable moment between the Red Hood and the Blue Hood.

I am weak for these little glimpses of a good Jason take in the middle of an incredibly awful/OOC story. And just to live in my own fantasy world I will headcanon that Jason promised himself to keep an eye out for Tyler and his mom. He would have wanted to know about their life and that they are still out of trouble.

Jason is a good man, don’t you forget that DC, I don’t care how much you twist it. Jason killing Tyler’s dad wasn’t a horrible act, it was fair game. That man was a horrible person, he drugged his child and made his wife (?) almost overdose. You never gave context as to why that man was working as a drug dealer but you told us those things so Jason should never feel like he did something wrong. As far as we know, Tyler and his mom are better off without him.

Having said that, lets go back to the pain of what is reading a Red Hood story.

“I’m giving up the guns.”

You know what, fine, as long as DC doesn’t pull another “I will stop being Red Hood for you Barbara” I will be fine. He can kill people with other things, he used to have the all-blades, he had normal swords and he had crowbars.

I will sacrifice Jason looking hot as hell when he pulls out his guns just to keep him as the Red Hood, all DC has to do is not give him that stupid… bat… symbol… oh no…. oh my god I can feel it… that thing, that horrible thing is making a comeback! NO!

Jason and Bruce’s talk is basic and it doesn’t do anything for anyone, in the end saying that Jason isn’t changing his ways for Bruce but that he is doing it for himself is more of the same. We know he is doing it for Bruce and we know DC is doing it because they cannot handle good, complex and interesting characters. We know that and sadly we have to live with it.

About Bruce’s illusion, well, Bruce has said that he wanted to kill the clown for a very long time and in the King run it was basically said that if Bruce were to be happy then the idea of Batman would die.

Listen, between me and you, sometimes I think that the Joker isn’t that big of a problem for Gotham as a whole, that clown has beef with the Bat and no one else. If Bruce has killed the Joker Jason would have been happy with Bruce all those years ago but killing the Joker wouldn’t make Gotham a safe place and any of his kids happier.

Bruce needs to care for his children, but he won’t do that, he has Dick for that. Taking care and raising Damian? No, thank you, I will not do that. Giving a shit about my son who lost all his memories and is alone? No thank you, I won’t do that and then I will lie about having watched him over. Tim? Oh, never heard of him, sorry.

The last page of this story is the one of Jason arriving home and finding a new suit that Bruce gave him with the bat symbol on it. That symbol that he had ripped off of Jason’s beat up body back in RHatO #25 (nope, I am not letting that one go).

Oh, and Bruce leaving that suit in Jason’s home gives me the same exact vibes as the time that Bruce was like “Long overdue. This is where you belong. As one of us. One of the family” in Nightwing #74 a second after Dick had regained his memories.

I don’t know why but they make him sound incredibly cold and like these people are just his pawns that he needs to rope back in every time they get away from him. It’s very disturbing.

Anyway, that’s all from me, I obviously LOVED this book, best Jason Todd/Red Hood characterisation ever! 11/10 would recommend to everyone including my enemies!

🙃

[seventeenlovesthree]

@digiweek​​ 2021: Day 4: Dark/Light (2002)

Hello darkness, my old friend... Not gonna lie, I have thought long and hard about how I wanted to tackle this prompt. There have been so many possibilities. It’s no surprise that I’m a sucker for angst - and depressed!Taichi is one of the themes Digimon itself has explored to quite an extreme extent in Tri, the Stageplay, Kizuna and even the novels. Heck, I have created my own magical girl/boy AU in which the final fight involves Taichi being so engulfed in his own trauma that he has to be rescued... Plus, the very first Taishirou art I ever posted on here was about the idea of Taichi being stuck in the Dark Cave himself... And I still believe that it would have been perfectly valid for both Taichi and Koushirou to get stuck in there the same way Yamato and Sora did in Adventure 01.

So let’s dive deep into headcanon/meta territory:

Both of them have to deal with their own kind of trauma at a very young age - just like almost all the other Chosen Children. 

Taichi is haunted by the idea of almost having “killed” his baby sister when they were still very little and dreads being responsible for something like this to happen again. This is why he gets into sacrifice mode so easily, this is why he puts on a smile and tries to deal with everything on his own without confiding in anyone. And it’s no surprise that he gets completely and thoroughly overwhelmed by the sheer idea of his own recklessness causing harm to others, to people that are dear to him.

Koushirou on the other hand, hides behind his computer and a mask of politeness, losing himself in solving riddles and puzzles, because that’s much easier than dealing with people or thinking about who he even is - since he has no idea where he comes from, why he was “abandoned” and is, probably, also left wondering if he did anything “wrong” for this to happen. This is why he’s afraid to fail, to not “know” everything - outside of himself -, because it means he can’t be useful. 

This is the dark part we’re dealing with - and if Digimon Adventure 02 taught me anything, it’s that these versions of Taichi (14) and Koushirou (13) are probably their most mature, most “grounded” selves in the entire series. Why is that? Because, even if 02 doesn’t primarily focus on them, it still tells us that they have become way more confident in who they are and what they do. And I might even go as far as to say: Through their adventures and their friendship, they have become exactly the people their younger selves would have needed.

Taichi has managed to open up to someone - to Koushirou - about the darkest moment of his life, he was able to confide in him, be vulnerable and open. And even if he still has a long way to go, he has become more collected about his decisions at this point in time. Koushirou was able to reconcile with his parents and made peace with his past - because the Digital World, their experiences and also the way Taichi always treated him as an equal helped him to come out of his shell naturally, helping him to actually become a “mentor figure” for the “next generation” of Chosen Children - and thus he decided to actively and happily deal with other people. It’s by the end of Adventure 01 already that he wants to support Taichi, help him to take care and be kinder to himself.

... And if Tri onwards hadn’t refused to let these two help each other to grow further, everything could have become even more amazing. Which is why I absolutely adore the Stageplay so much - because it understood what these two were all about. It addresses the fact that Koushirou thought that Taichi “could at least speak honestly with” him. Because that’s what they do, what they always did - being there for each other. So it’s not even that unlikely to assume that Koushirou might have confessed his (once) darkest secret to Taichi at this point as well.

By the end of 02, they have both become so smooth, almost acting like dads and an old couple healthily bickering with each other for Daisuke and the others that the only conclusion I can come to right here is: Taichi and Koushirou are each other’s light. And the reason why things in Tri onwards progress so slowly and awkwardly is that these two aren’t working together as they used to - both try to deal with their (personal) problems on their own and that’s why their trauma-inflicted “anti-crest” conflicts (”I’m afraid to be responsible for anyone getting hurt” vs. “I’m ignorant and so I can’t do anything”) arise again.

I am 100% certain: Had they ever ended up in a Dark Cave, they would have easily made each other’s darkness creep out of their bodies again - as long as they stayed by each others side. Instead of falling into despair, they’d shine bright like a beautiful sunset of orange and purple.