#I want to show them to the world exactly how I envision them in my mind

[silverquillsideas]

Maybe my writing is totally shit. Maybe it's boring and repetitive. Maybe nobody cares.

But do I care about these characters? Do I care enough to write about them? To tell their story?

Yes. I do.

So I'll continue to write.

Because if I don't tell their story, then who will?

[grison-in-space]

Listening to Artificial Condition again, it strikes me how much Murderbot uses empathy reflexively as a survival skill. Look at this bit.

Upon meeting it, ART allows it on board and then announces that it knows that Murderbot is rogue. Then ART threatens to destroy it if it hacks ART's own systems. Murderbot is immediately terrified and shuts down all inputs, gives serious thought to spending the entire three month journey unconscious, and then considers the potential avenues of damage from ART's drones. ART, not realizing why Murderbot had suddenly gone silent, tells it to quit sulking, which understandably pisses off the still-terrified Murderbot. It dumps a bunch of memories of coercive treatment into ART's feed, and ART goes silent.

Then this happens:

Then it said, I’m sorry I frightened you. Okay, well. If you think I trusted that apology, you don’t know Murderbot. Most likely it was playing a game with me. I said, “I don’t want anything from you. I just want to ride to your next destination.” I’d explained that earlier, before it opened the hatch for me, but it was worth repeating. I felt it withdraw back behind its wall. I waited, and let my circulatory system purge the fear-generated chemicals. More time crawled by, and I started to get bored. Sitting here like this was too much like waiting in a cubicle after I’d been activated, waiting for the new clients to take delivery, for the next boring contract. If it was going to destroy me, at least I could get some media in before that happened. I started the new show again, but I was still too upset to enjoy it, so I stopped it and started rewatching an old episode of Rise and Fall of Sanctuary Moon. After three episodes, I was calmer and reluctantly beginning to see the transport’s perspective. A SecUnit could cause it a lot of internal damage if it wasn’t careful, and rogue SecUnits were not exactly known for lying low and avoiding trouble. I hadn’t hurt the last transport I had taken a ride on, but it didn’t know that. I didn’t understand why it had let me aboard, if it really didn’t want to hurt me. I wouldn’t have trusted me, if I was a transport. Maybe it was like me, and it had taken an opportunity because it was there, not because it knew what it wanted.

The thing about Murderbot's survival is that it clearly involves quite a bit of negotiating with other constructs and bots. That's how it talks its way onto cargo hauler bots in the first place. It uses empathy--envisioning the emotional and cognitive context of the individuals it encounters--to work out what different kinds of people want, so that it can offer them fair trades. It also uses empathy to consider what humans might be looking for, so it can practice blending in and hide.

Murderbot would never have survived so long if it wasn't capable of assessing the individual desires of the people--human, bot, and construct--around it. It thinks about ART's probable fears and motivations so that it can consider whether ART is inherently an ongoing threat or a potential ally.

When your survival depends on evading detection, you get really good at assessing perceptual biases so that you can shape yourself to fit into them. People talk about murderbot being radically empathetic as a choice it makes, or as a feature of its personality that makes it a good person. But I think murderbot would be the the first person to tell you that this empathy is part of its threat assessment suite, a skill that was developed out of necessity in order to allow you to survive.

It is also a trait that makes murderbot a good person, of course: it chooses very carefully to try to survive by doing as little harm as possible and by offering things, like media, that buy it access to things it needs. But it started as a survival skill. It's part of hypervigilance.

I think one of the strengths of this series is that so many of the things we love about SecUnit are traits developed for survival in an inherently threatening world. The shape of its mind and heart have been changed by the trauma of its origin--but they don't make murderbot less good for being altered, even if that skill was developed in a traumatic context.

I like that.

[s-4pphics]

make the bed. (e.w.)

“𝒜𝓃𝑜𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝓅𝑒𝓇𝒻𝑒𝒸𝓉 𝓂𝑜𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 𝒹𝑜𝑒𝓈𝓃'𝓉 𝒻𝑒𝑒𝓁 𝓁𝒾𝓀𝑒 𝓂𝒾𝓃𝑒, 𝒶𝓃𝑜𝓉𝒽𝑒𝓇 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃𝑔 𝐼 𝒻𝑜𝓇𝒸𝑒𝒹 𝓉𝑜 𝒷𝑒 𝒶 𝓈𝒾𝑔𝓃.”

omggg my first writing challenge YIPPPEEEE shoutout to olivia rodrigo

ty to the post-pandemic prose and my babies @elliesbelle and @totheblood for pointers :D love yall down 

wc;cw: 1.1K, just angst YAAAAY, internalized homophobia, ellies so sad :(, mentions of alcohol

“lf I liked girls,” you slurred, your lips brushing against the shell of Ellie’s ear, the pounding speakers synched with the squeezes in her chest, “I swear t’god… you’d be mine.” 

Whenever you drunkenly murmur to her like this, Ellie wishes she didn’t hear you; She was shocked she could over the ruckus happening all around, rattling the bubble she created for the two of you. You always sounded so sure with your lies. They never fail to throw her into fight or flight mode. She tensed and her stomach churned in despair. 

“Y’so perfect, Ellie. Love y’so… fuckin’ much. All mine.” 

All she could do was nod and whirl you around with a pained smile before burying it into your clothed shoulder. You didn’t bat an eye; You were always the affectionate drunk. 

But she wanted to scream. To cry and beg and ask — demand that you fall into her right where you stand. To love her the way she’s loved you since she showed you how to ride a bicycle in elementary school. She flinched at every delicate kiss you planted on her neck, her hands squeezing at your hips. She doesn’t know if she wants to push or pull you closer. 

She knows. Her arms enclosed around your waist and you giggle into her skin. 

This is exactly how you two should be. She’s envisioned it since middle school: completely infatuated and engulfed in each other, secluded off in your own little world filled with nothing but solace. Closeness. Affection and desire. 

So why was she sick to her stomach at your scent? Lavender and sage no longer brought her the comfort that they used to in adolescence. She was being torn apart from the inside out, but she couldn’t scream. 

She only listened, digested every drunk fallacy that you directed to her in secret. With no one watching. No one ever watched. No one could know. That was your only rule when she climbed through your window months prior. Please just keep it between us, you’d whispered before leaning in to kiss her. 

At least Ellie could imagine that this was real as she held you tight: recreate the same image in her mind over and over. The two of you are together and happy to be in love with no selfishness or regrets in her mind. All she had to do was close her eyes, and you were all hers, just like you said. She’s so, so in love with you. 

But you didn’t want her. You never did. 

She’s instantly reminded of that day a few months ago. The memory feels like a ghost over her shoulder; Maybe that’s why she’s constantly peeking over it, picking at it with her nails. 

The two of you often reserved study rooms during exam season for review, but you had other plans. You were exactly where you were supposed to be — room 213 — but you weren’t by yourself. 

You — beautiful, as always — brought… friends. Friends that Ellie knew, that you knew, didn’t like her. She never actually talked to them, but she always felt… off. She was instantly riddled with anxiety, the books that she checked out ten minutes ago almost hitting the floor as her arms weakened. Sweat pebbled on her forehead as she stood and watched everyone stare at her. 

Why did it look like they were all laughing? She couldn’t hear any chuckles, but there was laughter. Someone’s laughing at her. Do they know? You have to know, but do they know about the two of you? About how Ellie feels—

Ellie? you’d called. 

… Mhm? she recalls almost fainting. 

Your eyes were confused; You knew something was off, and it made her even more nervous. 

Sit down, honey. Come meet everyone. You made sure to massage her knee under the table; It always soothed her. 

The introductions were surprisingly smooth. Ellie never expected your friends to be so polite considering how rowdy they seemed outside of class. She was pleasantly surprised and put at ease. Until the end of your study session. 

Everyone was packing their bags and cracking jokes. Ellie even got a couple laughs out of some of them during the quiet few hours. 

Ellie wasn’t sure what came over her, but she eased closer to you, still gathering your books. She relaxed at your scent. When you turned to face her with that gentle smile, her mouth moved on autopilot. 

I missed you so much. You never hit me back last night.  

Maybe it was the way Ellie said it. She shouldn’t have looked into your eyes the way she did, whispered to you like that, said she missed you with so much devotion. But she did, and she wished she didn’t. 

Your smile turned to worry instantaneously, and Ellie’s heart plummeted when your head whipped around the room to check if anyone heard before turning back to her. No one cared. 

Ellie felt like she’d been stabbed. It happened so quickly; she probably would’ve missed it if she blinked. Her nails dug into the hardcover of her books, tears jerking in her eyes before she tossed a stiff see you guys later over her shoulder and rushed out the room. You tried to grab her arm, but she shoved you off. She had to fight her instincts so she wouldn’t turn around and apologize for being too rough. 

She got back to her dorm and… trashed it while she cried. Disgust and anger flooded her system while she threw her clothes, her trinkets, the photo of you, Ellie, and her mother at your shared high school graduation across the room (she only sobbed harder when she noticed it cracked when it hit the floor). The emotions that rushed through her weren’t even for you, but for herself. Ellie’s own hope destroyed her, and she only has herself to blame. 

She should’ve known at the time to never speak to you again, but she loved you. She loves you. Every fiber, every cell of her being lived to see you at your happiest; It’s tortuous how you expose the darkest parts that she wished to keep hidden until the end of time. She hasn’t felt like this since she was a teenager. 

And yet, she still swayed you. Kept you close so she could breathe you in. This is the most you allow, at least: physical touch. She knew better than to allow you to mistreat her, but she couldn’t leave you. You both danced until your legs burned, and you fell into her bed the same night. 

She forced herself to lay in the massacred mattress that she’d tried to keep made since she was a kid. The least you could do was fluff the pillow you slept on every night.

[kisseobie]

hi I absolutely adore your writing!!! who do think amon piwon is a more love st first sight kinda a guy?

love at first sight

pairings: ot6 p1harmony x reader

warnings: none!

a/n: in my fantasy world they all fall in love with me at first sight but i’m gonna be as realistic as possible based off of their personalities and things the members have said themselves .. i hope u enjoy <33

𓈒ིུ keeho

i think i remember that on kyo and jiung’s radio show they mentioned this topic once and keeho was a firm believer that love at first sight doesn’t exist, that attraction can definitely be sensed straight away but love is only something that you can experience as you get to know the ins and outs of someone. that being said, for keeho, i would say that although no, he doesn’t fall in love with you at first sight, he does feel a gravitational pull towards your energy and approaches you right when he sees you, internally passing it off as just “wanting to meet new people” when in fact, his subconscious is telling him to introduce himself to you. love at first sight is non existent with keeho, but he knows that it feels right to be around you, which later may blossom into something more than just a “pull”.

𓈒ིུ theo

doesn’t have a set opinion on love at first sight, but i do think he’ll experience it with the right person. doesn’t know if it’s your smile, your beauty, or your charisma that has been on his mind since his first encounter with you, but he knows that it was meant to be. i can see taeyang being frustrated with how he feels after just meeting you, because “love at first sight” doesn’t even occur to him as an option to consider, but as he gets to know you in your future encounters, he begins to understand that that is exactly what he felt. i can envision theo as completely shifting from someone pretty indifferent about relationships to someone who constantly daydreams about seeing you again. so yes, in my opinion, i think theo would experience love at first sight!

𓈒ིུ jiung

no, but just like keeho, the attraction is definitely there. when he first laid his eyes on you, he could place you in his mind as both intelligent and beautiful, and that intrigues him. ji is not a risk taker, nor is he someone to believe in cliches, so he would rather opt to get to know you as a friend at first with no other intentions until he eventually does fall in love with you. but i’m gonna say that jiung is the most difficult to imagine “love at first sight” with. he’s a thinker that needs to analyze all parts about you before allowing himself to open his heart to you. i don’t see this as a bad thing though! i think jiung, as a deep thinker, is definitely the type to value personality the most, so when he does fall in love with you, there isn’t any doubts in his mind, and he knows it was meant to be.

𓈒ིུ intak

intak is tricky but i’m going to say no, only because he’s a social butterfly and feels the need to make a connection with anyone he meets. i don’t think that would change as it comes to you, and like jiung, he wouldn’t have any other intentions than becoming your friend (that doesn’t mean he doesn’t get nervous around you due to your beauty!! but he doesn’t quite perceive that as love). however, i do see intak as someone to fall in love quite quickly, so even if it wasn’t “love at first sight”, it happens very fast. he’s a forward man!

𓈒ིུ soul

as a great judge of character, i think shota would! but the idea of that definitely intimidates him, and frustrates him more than anything. he can tell when he’s drawn to someone and when he meets you, he feels something deeper than his usual desire to get close to someone. it isn’t how he felt with someone like keeho, who he automatically sensed comfortability with in a platonic sense. the butterflies in his tummy scare him, and he doesn’t know what to do with them. however, his infatuation with you definitely forces him out of his comfort zone, which leads to him seeking out your presence wherever he bumps into you, and what happens after that is for you to decide :p

𓈒ིུ jongseob

yes yes yes! and i’m not just saying that because he’s my ult lol in my crush headcanons i also mentioned this but i think seob is so beyond his years that love at first sight is definitely something he could experience. i believe that he wouldn’t be aware of this himself, so he probably would try to downplay how he felt when he first laid eyes on you as just mere attraction to a pretty girl, but it begins to click in his head when he can’t get you off his mind for the rest of the night, despite never holding a conversation with you. confides in shota because he thinks soul is the only one who wouldn’t tease him for how he’s feeling. shota eggs him on to get your number eventually, and he comes to realize after texting you that you might feel the same way about him too <3

taglist: @woozixo @hearts4chanhee @kyokopi @astro-doll-the-star @soobiary @kyaaramello @t3ssamoodboard @angelcbf @idontknow-1s-world @vivienne-sim @elissasimp @imjustayapper @ihatewreckingballmains @sosaverse @seobing @www90kitsch @khfviq @barbiekh86t @bbyjjunie @taeyangi @fullsunstrawberry @jihnyah @intheemptymirror @watamotee33 @dreamer1299 @jixnnsie @wonootnoot @yukx-x047

© kisseobie, please do not repost my writing!

° . ❀

[piastriesque]

not your future fa14 x reader

⤷pairing: fernando alonso x fem!reader

⤷warnings: age gap

⤷summary: for the sake of your boyfriend's happiness, you made the decision to break up with him

⤷word count: 1.4k

note: i don't usually write, even if i do it's in my first language, not english, so i'm kinda scared. i apologize for all the mistakes. if you point them out to me, i will correct them!

The sound of falling drops got on your nerves. You were waiting for the man to finish showering. You were pacing around the room, wanting to get it all over with already. The sudden sound of a closing door startled you so much that you almost jumped. You quickly sat down on the couch. 

A moment later, your boyfriend Fernando entered the room. He was wearing only gray shorts. 

“I forgot to take my T-shirt with me,” he smiled innocently, though you could bet he was teasing you. When you barely reciprocated the smile, he felt that something was wrong. He walked toward you and reached his hand not far from you. Only now did you notice that there was “the forgotten” T-shirt lying nearby. The man put on the shirt in silence, covering the samurai tattoo you so adored. The T-shirt stuck to his back, you guessed that he must not have wiped himself thoroughly. 

“Is something wrong?” he asked, sitting next to you. Even though earlier you wanted to get it off your chest as soon as possible, now you lacked the courage. “You seem a little subdued lately. Do you have any problems? Did something happen at work? Or maybe it's about your parents?” he wanted to know.

You shook your head, denying. You didn't have time to form the words in your head, because your boyfriend kept asking.

“Does it have anything to do with me? Have I done something wrong?” he grabbed your hands. This gesture made you look at him. His beautiful brown eyes were worried, and still-wet strands of hair fell on his forehead.

“No, you haven’t done anything wrong.” You swallowed saliva and then slowly took your hands from his grasp. “I… I think… I have realized that this will not work” you mumbled.

“What? What do you mean?” he felt as if he had been hit on the head.

“I think we should break up”

“But why?”

When you looked away, refraining from crying, he stood up and started walking nervously around the room. So many thoughts were swirling in his head. He didn't understand anything. Not long ago, you said you were the luckiest woman in the world, having him by your side. What has changed?

“Have I done something wrong?” he asked for the second time that evening, after a while, he added, “Do you have someone else?”.

“There is no one else. And you haven't done anything wrong. You have always been so good to me.” Your heart ached more and more with every word you spoke, “But we envision our future differently.”

“Really? Until now, I thought we wanted the same thing.” He sat down again, “Please, look at me,” his voice softened, “To me, my future is you.”

You couldn't hold back any longer. You burst into tears. Fernando put his arm around you, and because you didn't protest, he pulled you close.

“It’s okay,” he started stroking your head, “Tell me exactly what's going on, I'm sure we can deal with it together somehow.”

“No, we really can't” you whispered against his chest.

“Well, then…” he gulped, “How do you imagine your future?”

His hand kept gently caressing your hair. You felt bad about him being so gentle and tender, trying to reassure you. The thought crossed your mind that you would have preferred him to be mad. Maybe then this conversation would have been easier. He would have started shouting, and you would hit back. Love, for a moment, would be overshadowed by anger. Instead, there was something extremely innocent and fragile sitting next to you. Although it tried not to show it, you knew he was hurting inside.

You took a deep breath. “It doesn't matter anymore, but…” you saw him open his mouth. “Please, don't interrupt me. But… I always imagined that one day we would get married. We would adopt a dog. We will travel together, I will cheer for you at the races. Perhaps we would be able to do some projects together. It would look more or less like it does now… Plus a dog. You and I, always together,” the man smiled softly, “Just the two of us”.

“I don't understand”

“I’m not ready to have a child”

Silence fell over the room. The man's face showed confusion and surprise.

“I understand, but why are you talking about it? I never pressed for it. We've talked about this before. We don't need to rush.”

“Yes, we talked, but recently I realized that I am not ready for it. I would like to focus on myself, my career, and my self-development. I still have time to become a mother. And you, how long can you wait?” 

Fernando didn’t answer.

“There is no denying it, the age difference between us is quite significant. I don't need to rush, I can become a mother even in 10 years or later. And you… I know you love children. I want you to be at full strength to play with your own”.

“Remember what I said a few minutes ago? You are my future. I want to be with you. No matter what. I love you” he declared.

“I love you too. That's why I don't want to regret something later. I can't do that to you” You stood up and left the room.

You and he had a few more conversations with each other, but eventually, the man realized that you were adamant. He stopped sending messages and calling. You agreed that since emotions were still strong, you should not have any contact, even friendly contact, at least for a while. However, before you knew it a year passed, then 2…. And recently it was the 4th anniversary of your breakup. Neither of you has contacted the other. At first, you lacked courage, you were afraid that the other person might not want to talk, and then, although it's sad to admit, you got used to the absence from each other's lives.

It's all been very hard for you. After the breakup, you notoriously avoided articles about him to avoid thinking about your ended relationship. Later it became a habit for you. You were completely unaware of what was going on in his life. You had no idea even if he was still driving in Formula One.

Sitting on a park bench, you were drinking coffee. You took a break from work to get some air and breathe. By the way, you decided to take your dog for a walk, he was now lying next to your legs and snoring peacefully until…

“Puppy!” you heard a child's scream. It was a little girl, two or three years old. She extended her hand towards your dog.

Immediately afterward, a man appeared at her side, addressing her in Spanish. Even if you knew Spanish well, you wouldn't be able to understand a word, because the man's presence completely took away your ability to think.

“Hi” Fernando said kindly but was also slightly surprised to see you.

“Hi” you replied, praying that a quaver in your voice could not be heard.

“It’s my daughter” he turned his head towards the girl “Why don't you introduce yourself to the lady”

The girl did what her dad asked her to do. Shyly smiling at the same time.

“Beautiful name. It's nice to meet you. My name is Y/N” you reciprocated the smile.

You noticed that the girl's gaze once again went to your dog. You weren't the only one who saw it.

“You should ask the owner's permission to pet the dog first”

“Can I?” she asked with hope in her eyes.

“Of course, you can,” you laughed kindly.

The girl squealed with joy and immediately approached the animal.

“So… how are you?” the Spaniard asked.

You managed to talk for 10 minutes, then had to say goodbye, because they were in a bit of a hurry, and the man promised to buy his daughter an ice cream before returning home.

You felt as if some void in your heart was filled. It was a relief to see him happy. Even though, you were ultimately not the one who was his future.

[lightlycareless]

I feel like this is soooooo Y/N and Naoya coded

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZPREtqECu/

It feels like it’s happen for the Y/N and Naoya that we’re in the secret relationship or something X3 Hehe I just thought it was super cute. I find myself going out of my way to find cute couples videos just to imagine and Y/N and Naoya 😝

Omg this is sooo cuteeeeeee!!!! Thank you so much for sharing this with me ❤️❤️❤️❤️ I didn't want to say it out loud in fear of being judged but yes, this is exactly how I envision them to be when completely alone, and Naoya in need of being pampered hehehe

Naturally, had to write something :) Hope you enjoy it!

warnings: none. fluff. highschool AU. Naoya is deeply in love with you. maybe hints of something more intimate but you barely notice it; unless you're a pervert like me.

Happy reading!

Imagine comforting Naoya after a long, tedious week of exams, projects, both practical and theorical—simply continuous scrutiny by teachers and clan elders alike to the point where your boyfriend just wanted to disappear and forget about everything once he was done.

Well, make you help him forget about everything. Nuzzling against your chest as your arms wrapped him in a warm embrace, gently reminding him of all the things he already knew he was, but never minded hearing them again from your lovely voice.

“Hmm, it must’ve been an exhausting week, huh, Naoya-kun?” you cooed, hand delicately threading his soft black locks—he’s been so busy, he’s barely gotten time to dye his roots; Though you’d never tell him that out of the two, you preferred his natural color. “My poor boyfriend…”

“It’s been awful, princess.” He groans against your chest, gently squeezing your sides. “I don’t want to be anywhere else but here from now on.”

“Did you miss me, baby?”

“So, so much…” Naoya sighs, leaning deeper into your chest and taking in your scent—that lovely, sweet perfume he once admitted to greatly enjoy; and ever since, it’s all you wore. “You’re all I thought about, my beautiful mochi… I love you so much I’d rather be die than to be away from you.”

“I love you too, Naoya.” You blush, hugging him tighter against you. “My busy, talented, hardworking heir of a boyfriend.”

“You can say that again…” He says, never one to cower away from being complimented; or more like reminded of his greatness.

“There’s no one better than you. My boyfriend is the best sorcerer in the whole school—no, whole country!” you continue on, with Naoya lifting his gaze to you, eyes softening as you declare your heart’s greatest happiness. “He’s handsome, funny, and generous. He always knows what to do to make me happy and there’s no one in the whole world I’d rather be with than him!

But most importantly, he’s all mine.”

“Hmmm, you certainly know how to get me in the mood.” He murmurs while leaning even closer to you, enough so that his lips were just a few centimeters away; his breath over your skin. “I wouldn’t mind hearing more of what you have to say if so…”

“How about I show you instead…?” you respond, moving forward to finally place your lips over his, taking him in a kiss that felt as if it were the first time; such things were to happen after going on an eternity without seeing one another.

All you’ve gotten were a few glimpses here and there across the hallways before Naoya dove right back into his tests and you onto your projects. So hectic, you couldn’t even have lunch together—a complete nightmare!

But hindrances like these only made your fated reunion much sweeter as seen in the soft yet passionate way in which Naoya nibbled at the bottom of your lip before moving towards your mouth, slipping his tongue within and intertwining it with yours, causing you to gently moan in response, much to his pleasure and excitement.

Ah, after a long week, there was nowhere else he wished to be than here, with you, doing this—a small taste of the future that awaited him alongside you, if you so desired. His life after work unfolding like this:

You, his princess, patiently waiting in the home he’d get for you, or the Zen’in estate (depends of what you want—he’s already set his eyes on an apartment anyways) for his return. A warm smile on your lips as you welcome him with open arms, ready to wash away all his stresses with those kisses he can never get enough of; and perhaps a bit more.

From there, a warm meal. Getting to sit down with you and complain of the stupidities he’s already predisposed to expect from work, though he won’t burden you much with them, preferring to spend his time with you doing something else—entirely different.

And finally, at the end of the day, laying beside you. Tightly holding you against him as he once again takes in your comforting scent; there’s no doubt in Naoya’s mind that you’ll do everything in your power to receive him appropriately, if you know what he means. A wonderful way to end the night.

God, why can’t life be like that already? Why does he have to go through tedious ordeals just to spend a few measly hours of the day with you?

Naoya would give everything  in the world to be completely alone with you and do all the things he’s been playing with in his mind—

And save himself from the following humiliation.

“EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” A whiny shriek, so loud that could probably be heard from all the way to the other side of the school, is suddenly heard; making the two freeze on the spot, eyes peeled wide open as you question whether to turn around and face the culprit or remain there, as if keeping still would make them go away.

But that wasn’t to happen, of course not! If anything, acting the fool would only worsen the situation, and such, you and Naoya slowly begin to turn into the direction of the shriek, to be received with the horrifying, blood curling sight of Suguru and Satoru intensely staring at the two—admiring a part of your relationship they weren’t supposed to know of!

“AHAHAHAHA What are you two doing glued together like that?!??!” Satoru continues to jest, dramatically laughing at the two in hopes of further embarrassing them.

And it would’ve worked had it been any other occasion; with you reacting shyly, too startled to do anything else but cower behind your boyfriend and let him deal with the problem.

Not today, though. For you were too annoyed from being kept away from Naoya for a whole week. Too uninterested in playing coy this time yet motivated enough to put Satoru back in his place once and for all.

“Don’t you have manners?!” You shrieked, pulling yourself away from Naoya and angrily heading onto the pair. “Of course not, you’re just an arrogant idiot!”

“Hey—hey, Y/N-chan! No need to get your panties in a twist!” Satoru laughs, finding the sight of you, someone way shorter than him attempting to scold him, hilarious. “I was just teasing!”

“And you couldn’t just keep walking, could you?! You always have something to say about every little thing that crosses your path!” you continue. “God, why are you so annoying?! At least Suguru has the decency to not be a jerk like you!”

Kind of. Suguru thought just about the same as Satoru, only that he was much more skilled in keeping it hidden.

And approaching the situation with tact.

“If you didn’t want to be caught then maybe don’t do that in the common room?” Suguru suggests. You frown.

“I’m not going to let you losers tell me where to be and what to do with my boyfriend!” You cry. “That’s why you guys will remain single forever! Because you don’t know anything about love!”

“Pfft, what?!” Satoru scoffs. “You’re so silly; do you even hear yourself?”

“You don’t have to worry about us, Y/N. It’s not like we’re planning on stealing your busy boyfriend.” Suguru says—so much for not being a jerk!

“Oh, Naoya-kun, you’re the best sorcerer ever!” Satoru plays along.

“You always know how to get me in the mood, princess."

“I missed you so so much, pookie!!”

“I just want to stay with you like this forever!”

“You—You idiots!!!!”

Instigated by their jests, you reach out for whatever you had in hand and throw it at Gojo, followed by frantic punches against his chest (which he only felt as tickles, of course—mostly amused by your antics) and curses that eventually led Naoya to act by grabbing you from the shoulders and pulling you away.

“Let me go, Naoya! These idiots need to know to leave me alone!” You argued, trying to free yourself from his hold.

“Y/N, they’re not worth it.” Naoya responds, though he won’t deny that seeing this protective side of yours was doing things to him.

“You could be kissing me, mochi!! Hm??!” Satoru making kissy noises effectively pushes you over the edge.

“That’s it, you’ve done it!!”

“—Alright, that’s enough now.” Geto intervenes this time around by pulling Gojo away from you, just before you could injure him. Not that you could, but he’s never seen this kind of determination from you before, nor does he want to put it to the test.

Besides, there’s always this lingering threat that where an upset Y/N, an angrier sibling appears, and that’s the last thing this situation needed.

“Stop it, Satoru—you’ve done enough.”

“Ah, Suguru!! I was just getting to the best part!”

“I’m sure they were too.”

“Suguru!” You accuse.

“We won’t disturb you anymore, lovebirds. Just be sure to be safe.” Suguru teases one last time.

“Or the Zen’in will have another member!” Satoru adds.

“You—” but before you could add anything else, they were gone.

It was unfair how the two always managed to escape just before they could face any real trouble, having a peculiar talent to come along, always know what to say to stir the pot, and leave unscathed, with the victims of their teasing being the ones forced to deal with their actions.

Well, if this is how it always went, then there was no reason to break your head trying to outsmart them. Not when you could easily spend all your energy in continuing where you and your boyfriend were left off, if not in a better disposition after Naoya got to see what your ire could do.

Something he’ll have to exploit later on, right after dealing with your persistent anger.

“Those idiots can never leave me alone!” You breathe, still furious and embarrassed by their antics. “They’re only jealous of me! It’s not my fault that they’re such idiots no one wants to date them.”

“Well, not everybody is as lucky as me.” Naoya smoothly adds, quickly overturning your emotions and making you blush.

“I’m glad you’re not like them.” You smile, walking over to him. “Kind of.”

“Kind of?” Naoya raises an eyebrow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Oh, nothing.” You giggle, acting coy.

“Ah, no you’re not.” And in one swift movement, Naoya places his hands behind your legs, picking you up and subsequently making you squeal. You hide your face in the crook of his neck soon after, unwilling to be exposed yet again. “And I’m not letting you down until you tell me.”

“Stop it! Someone is going to—someone is going to see us!” you fret, unwilling to go through that whole ordeal again. “Naoya!”

“Then you know what to do, princess.” He smirks, kissing the top of your head.

“I’ll tell you if we go somewhere private… please.”

“Really?” He asks. “And how do I know you’re not doing this to distract me, hm?”

Your only response comes from a stare, with those doe eyes that immediately have him wiping the reason of his annoyance out of his mind, not that it was affecting him much either way. Naoya was too enamored to care beyond you.

“My dorm or yours?” he eventually suggests, and you lean in to kiss him, a promise to continue off from where you were once interrupted.

“…Yours.”

There was much work to do, after all. All his stresses to deal with, which thankfully, had you, a loving girlfriend, to do so.

Naoya just hopes you’re prepared to take it.

It's the second time I've made Gojo and Geto appear out of the nowhere to pester out favorite couple, I gotta think they're doing it on purpose.

I mean, maybe; seems very in character for Satoru at least 🤣 and on that note, I'm very glad I got to write a angry Y/N; I've always wanted to do something where she's all defensive of Naoya and he's totally into it. I had another thing written somewhere with the same topic, not sure if I'm going to finish it though...

Anyways, thank you so much for sending in this!!! omg it was so sos sosososo cute I love it, Naoya reduced to nothing but putty in Y/N's hands. oitajkhjakjhgjkasg he's been completely converted to a SIMP and I will not accept any other opinion stating the contrary :)

Now, take care, and hope to see you soon... and more of these adorable videos 😭😭😭❤️❤️ UGH I NEED MORE.

[sweeterhoni]

MINORS DNI! have this before i drop the full fic somewhere between friday - sunday, this week!

not proofread. this snippet will be deleted before the full fic is out ! first part's pinned in my blog .

childhood friend!jake x afab!reader . r18 and sensitive topics (religion + dub-con themes)

wednesday came, and the field was packed with students. mostly women, who prepared banners with jake’s name.

it wasn’t enough for his drive, he appreciates all the support as he bowed a thanks to the crowd but his eyes search for you. he was desperate to see you with his last name and number, he wanted to see you brand yourself as his unknowingly.

the players whistled, it indicated your arrival. it was easy to spot you, you were everyone’s favorite and there was a huge number of guys who crushed on you. jake never liked that fact, even if you show no signs of interest in them. it just never sat right with him. he visibly showed his upset when you covered his jersey with a jacket. he strode and stopped completely in front of you, prompting you to get closer to the rails.

“give me your jacket” and it wasn’t a question or suggestion, he demanded. tapping the rail before having his arm stretched out, you complied in fear he might mess up later’s tryouts. without another word, jake retreated to his corner and started his warm up.

this little interaction left you dumbfounded, he watched how your mouth formed an o. he sucked in a breath with his fists clenched, he wanted to hover his thumb over your lips and command you to suck– he wanted to but he can’t.

not when your eyes glossed over the field, concerned if jake was in a sour mood or if her presence would make the tryouts go haywire. jake caught sight of your restless figure, you sat away from a friend and settled by the railings he figured you were nervous, probably overthinking the outcome of the tryouts and he found himself host a coy smile when realisation hits. he was all you can think of.

it became a boost to his drive but he was sure he’d also get hard if he’d envision you being fucked while you wear his jersey, and it wasn’t hard for jake to not have these thoughts. you entice him in ways you weren’t aware of and he wanted to indulge in it, if he gets to fuck you later.

. . . . .

the tryouts went smooth, now you’re seated in jake’s car after being promised that an ice cream date would be the best way to celebrate.

but only that? jake woudn’t settle for that. you knew him, his achievements were always celebrated in a grandoise way. so what exactly does jake have in mind?

would you have to spend thousands for the ice cream?

you arrived at a conclusion that your wallet might cry, you shivered and played with the hem of jake’s jersey. how innocent.

on the other hand, jake wanted to make you cry. he wants to make you beg, to introduce you to a world where he can be the only god you worship. ice cream was a cover up, he’d take you back to his apartment and devour you. his eyes would catiously glance to you, watching how you bite your lip and showed signs of anxiety. your eyes, there were tears threatening to fall and — oh how he loves the way you turn your head to the side to wipe the stray tears.

jake started wondering if you’d turn away from him when he starts fucking you. he wondered if you’d bite your lip or whine and let the neighbors know that their favorite angel was screaming for her new god’s name. he wondered if you’d ever been touched, let alone, fucked?

will he be the first?

he felt his pulse race, his hands were shaking in excitement at the mere thought that he would be the first to break you. in a hurry, jake gripped the steering wheel and accelerated.

“jake!” you whined in shock, you huffed and breathlessly repeated his name.

fuck. jake no longer knows if you were scared or if you were pleading. do you know? could you hear his thoughts?

it was driving him insane. if you knew and played along his act, or if you really don't know... jake just can't think straight when all he wants is to have your body on his. he ached, this time, it was unbearable. he had to act, you were already there. why would he wait any longer? when you look like you're ready to take him in right then and there.

“dove.. princess.. let me touch you.”

he spoke, his breathing was heavy and he flushed a dangerous shade of red. he looked angry.

“you trust me right pretty girl? come on, move.”

[thewritetofreespeech]

Fly me to the Moon

Astarion x Tav

WORDS: 2.6K RATING: T PAIRING: Ascended!Astarion x Tav SUMMARY: just as they were settled, plans seem to change. (sort of a sequel to [x])

Despite having all the luxuries and money available to him now, Astarion preferred to sleep in a smaller bed.

When you had finished redecorating the castle, an arduous process as you didn’t realize how big it was until you started, Astarion had been left the bedroom per his request and actually did it a lot more modestly than you thought he would. Somehow you envisioned gold for every nailed down surface, ornate rugs patterned across the floor, mirrors or reflective surfaces anywhere he could put them to preen at his reflection any space moment; now that he had it back.

There was a bit of gold. 1 larger rug under the bed to keep the feet from touching cold marble first thing in the morning. More than a few mirrors. But the part that surprised you was how…average the bed was. Along with the grandeur, you thought Astarion would want a lake of a bed to dominate the room. He corrected you and said that a bed like that wouldn’t be necessary as his intention was to be wrapped around you every night for eternity, so all of it would go to waste.

That’s why it was so strange when you realized he wasn’t there beside you in your sleep.

You awoke and sat up. Scanning the dark room and landing on a small light by the desk on the far side with Astarion sitting at it. His handsome face pursed in thought but warmed by the candlelight. You slipped out of bed onto the soft rug and walked over to see what he was doing so late at night.

"Oh, hello my love. Did I wake you?"

You shook your head. Coming up beside him to see what he was working on. "What's all this?"

"Maps for our travels." He announced. Showing you one that was faded and worn. "Although, we may have to engage a new map maker or literary archivist for some updated ones. I think some of these are older than I am."

"But not nearly as pretty." You reply with a chuckle. Kissing his cheek. "Why the sudden interest in geography? I thought we agreed to stay in the Gate for a while. 'Set up camp'. Establish a base for your great dark empire."

"Eh. I changed my mind." Astarion said that as if he had changed it on a whim. Perhaps he had. But the work he had poured himself over led you to believe this was a thought that had been seeping for a while. "I realized; I haven't actually left the city at all in 200 years. Where that Nautiloid spit me out was the furthest I had traveled since....I can't remember when. And, if it hadn't, picked me up and spit me out that is, I would still be here. Trapped in the city. My new gifts have left me with a literally world of possibilities to break free of these walls. It would be a shame to squander them.”

You supposed that was true. Astarion’s ascension had given him a lot of new abilities. Including, but not limited to, his continued ability to walk in the sun. Which made leaving the Gate all the more possible. There was a big, bright new world out there. You could see why he would want to leave. “Hmm…so, where do you want to go first then?”

“I…don’t know.” He told you honestly. “I have the means to go anywhere and yet somehow…that seems more challenging than no choices.”

“A burden of options.”

“Exactly!” He seemed incredibly pleased that you got it, without having to explain or dumb it down for you. “Just so long as we don’t have to sleep in the dirt again, I really have no real opinion on where we go.”

“No feelings of nostalgia bedding down by a campfire?”

“Oh please….” He seemed less pleased with that quip. “Have you traveled anywhere? You know, for all our near deaths and how intimate we are now, I also just realized I know almost nothing about you. Other than your body and parts of your mind from the tadpole.” Astarion leaned in close to take your hand. “I’m such a cad.”

You chuckle at him. But you tell Astarion no, you haven’t traveled before. Not really. Not the far off, wonderous, exotic, or lavish places Astarion probably had in mind to show you. Different beaches down the River Chionthar. The country side. Nothing special.

“Good!” He announced when you told him. Spinning around and standing from his desk. “I want us to share all of this together. See it all for the first time, side by side, as my consort. And, be the first to make love to you on every continent imaginable.”

You lean in close when he leaned forward to kiss you. Coiling your fingers through his wavy hair as he pulled you in by the waist. “I suppose we should start packing.”

“Hmm…yes. But that can wait until later.” You let out a surprised sound when Astarion lifted you up in his arms bridal style. Grinning at you with that cheeky smile of his. “For now, I think we should practice a bit before our journey. You can’t just expect to make love on every continent without a little stamina training, yes?” You giggle as he carried you back to bed.

Once you were done, and sufficiently exhausted, you fell asleep dreaming of far off places and exotic shores. The smell of salt air. The warm feeling of tall grass. All of it in your mind’s eye, along with Astarion.

[kaybreezy3000]

I was rewatching the seasons of my favorite dysfunctional family and I don't know if it's me or Five has a certain interest in blondes. I mean, Delores is blonde, Autumn (the one Five flirts with when she goes to pick up Luther) is blonde, and I think the dancer she was watching is also blonde. I don't know, I'm just saying that I find it curious… what do you think?

I think you are on to something. 😊

The show gave us many reasons to think that Five has a 'certain interest in blondes,' and the photographic evidence doesn't lie, especially when we are talking about how he specifically envisions Dolores after he gets magically goobered on by Jamie in season 3.

-see exhibit A:

(FYI-we are getting really serious with this one. Imagine a big nerd-aka-me, nervously doing a PowerPoint for the class. My pointer just smacked the white board with this image blown up on it, waking up most of the back row😂):

Here, Five clearly imagines or 'sees' Dolores as a blonde.

When it comes to that, we should probably assume when he found his partially intact mannequin while wandering the apocalypse, it's unlikely her wig would have been intact due to the extreme heat the tiny plastic fibers would have been exposed to. So, he's not basing it off that, or he probably isn't. Either way, thankfully Five's beloved mannequin wasn't completely destroyed in the blast or who knows what our poor guy would have done to maintain hope, and more importantly, cling to his sanity.

Five could have seen Dolores as anything, that being the version we saw in this scene didn't look exactly like the 70's store mannequin with her sharp Mona Lisa's like features, but he chooses to see in her as a very soft and loving person whose expression is beautifully full of life and youthfully round. He could have even aged her up with him as he got older but he apparently didn't.

So....

I say it's pretty evident Five wanted to see Dolores this way, and that says something about what his tastes are when it comes to romantic attraction.

Interestingly, when you think about that and the idea of who he could potentially see himself with romantically in the real world, maybe that also means Five would not oppose to being with someone younger. Many people do not like the idea of that, or him being with anyone at all, and I totally understand all of those takes, but based on what we saw multiple times, Five seems very much the type to want this type of intimacy we see above, and as we saw in season 1 with him and Dolores, he's for sure not against physically romantic gestures both openly and privately with his more plastic version of Dolores. He was always so protective and loving with her. Just the way he holds her is proof that this troubled man has so much love left in him. 😭

Also, on that track, it's not that far out there to think that Five might go for a someone far outside his mental age. I don't think he'd be horribly in the wrong for it either as long as he wasn't going for someone super young, like a minor. That would be a big no for me, and I can't see him doing that.

Many people in real life are with other's that have big age gaps, and many people are old souls at a young age, and I could see Five starting over with someone younger that challenges him in all the right ways. Maturity hits us all at different paces, and in some ways, I feel Five isn't really grown up yet even though he thinks he is. It's been said that all the Hargreeves have an emotional IQ that's somewhat laughable but that is why we love them and it's also very relatable. We all have our issues, and sadly, Five Hargreeves is a man that has many that aren't his fault. 🙃

When we are talking about Jack's club and Five's visit there, well, yes, again, Five shows a strong interest in what he's seeing going on around him.

-see exhibit B-'Autumn':

Another blonde! Five picked her out of the other girls working the floor, and then he hit on her!

It makes me laugh every time I think about her telling Luther about it. To me, it seemed Autumn was equal parts flustered and smitten by what he did, and I can't blame her for that considering the adorably smug confidence Five can throw down when he means business.

But the point is, you are right, Five intentionally picked another blonde.

Then...

-see exhibit C 'The Dancer':

Not a great picture to prove it, but the woman on stage was a blonde, and...

Five does seem to be enjoying himself. Just look at that contented face. Brilliantly hilarious how well Aiden Gallagher plays this off.

Needless to say, Five is very comfortable, and he appears to be particularly distracted by what is in front of him despite the real reason why he is at that club and how important it is that he find his siblings and gets them all out of there.

Add all this together and all signs from the show's source material point to Five having an appreciation for the female form, or maybe better put, for him desiring something a little curvier and softer to hold on to than his big bro Luther when he is lugging his exceptionally drunk ass home.

Long before we saw how Five envisioned Dolores; this scene at the club was why I wrote most of my fanfics with him ending up in some kind of romantic relationship with a person that fills these more 'feminine-ish' characteristics that he seems so drawn to.

That said, and the show's repeated evidence aside, I have written Five with a red-head that was very much his equal, and I have also paired him with a trans female-one who happened to be blonde and was a professionally trained dancer, so for that one I stayed true to what the show was pushing for the most part. 😉 To me, who Five is with doesn't have to be someone that fits in any one box. The more interpretations we have out there of how to love, or even who we can love, the better.

All that said, this reply is in no way meant to hurt or judge anyone who doesn't see things this way. I have read so many other stories by so many great fanfic writers that pair Five with all kinds of amazing people. He could fall in love with his Fudge Nutter for all I care. 😂

To me, it doesn't matter if Five is even in a romantic thing or not, and I know that's not what your question was about or what it was suggesting, but I wanted to clarify that for anyone who is possibly not grooving with what I am trying to say.

I like good writing that shows us something broken but beautiful inside the characters. That is why I do some of my stuff with the reader insert/or 'you' character being someone that can be anyone and I leave out the physical characteristics. I want to have something out there with Five that we can all imagine ourselves being a part of if that's your thing.

But, that said, when answering your real question, and when you look at what the show heavily gave us to go on, most of the time I have followed along with the idea that Five has a thing for the lovely blondes. And when I write him, I try to base my thoughts on him, as well as all the other characters, mostly on cannon ideas from the show, though sometimes I do so loosely or by expanding them drastically because I am attempting to create new and exciting storylines that we haven't had the joy of reading before or seeing on screen.

There you go, my fellow Five/TUA fan. Another book length answer coming from me over some super important stuff. 😁

Thank you for asking such a fun question that lets us revisit some very fun scenes from our favorite show.

☮️&❤️ Breezy

[thefrogdalorian]

The Best of Both Worlds - Chapter One

Din Djarin x Female Reader Modern!AU

❁ Series Masterlist ❁ My Masterlist ❁ Read on AO3 ❁

Word Count: 4690 Rating: General Summary: After a dreadful day which saw you drenched by a rainstorm after leaving a hectic day at work, you reflect on your love for Mando and upcoming excitement for the sci-fi convention you will soon be attending with your internet best friend. Content Warnings: None! Author's Note: Hope you liked the start! My love of mass transit systems bleeds through, I think. But I hope I captured how wonderful being part of a fandom and forming online friendships can feel! Thanks to @suresnips for being my beta!

1. Why Does It Always Rain On Me? [Reader's POV]

Spending your mid-twenties obsessing over a fictional character with fellow fans online was not exactly how you envisioned your life unfolding, but it seemed that the universe had other plans in store for you. You couldn’t be too disappointed with this outcome though, as the comforting familiarity of your favourite show and the community surrounding it was like a tight, warm embrace that had seen you through your toughest days. Just like today, when you would lean on The Mandalorian as a crutch yet again, as settling in to watch an episode would be the comfort you needed at the end of yet another miserable day.

It had been a draining day that seemed like it would never end. You seemed to be having an awful lot of them recently, where any little thing that could possibly have gone wrong had gone wrong. Work was busier than usual, with plenty of colleagues pestering you with questions and asking for assistance on tasks, when you had quite enough of your own work to occupy yourself with. Perhaps worst of all, you had forgotten to charge your headphones. Your heart sank as you went to turn them on just before you left work, only to find that there was no charge left. It was a major inconvenience as it meant that the soundtrack of your favourite show was not there to transport you to a different galaxy as you began your journey home. Instead, all you could hear was the relentless noise of the city. The cars and the people that never seemed to shut up for even one single second.

Your feet thundered against the pavement, the rhythmic thuds helping to ground you despite the loss of comfort that your precious headphones provided. Things were finally starting to look up. Well, they were, until you felt a spot of water against your left cheek. You sighed and looked up towards the sky, noticing the grey clouds that had suddenly rolled in from nowhere, and the eerily cold breeze that was suddenly swirling all around you. Rain was imminent. 

To add insult to injury and make your already torrid day even worse, the heavens promptly opened. And you had not worn a coat, nor brought an umbrella in the trusty backpack you carried everywhere. Even though the sky was a little grey, it had been a perfectly pleasant, warm morning when you stepped out of your building that morning. 

You muttered curses under your breath as the rain began ferociously pelting you, furious at your unpreparedness. You quickened your place, hurrying to the closest station to the museum you worked at as you continued to curse the weather with a variety of colourful language, but it had predictably done nothing to halt the relentless downpour. Even though summer should be approaching, the weather was awful. For what felt like weeks now, the weather had nothing but cloudy, cold and grey. It was beginning to grind you down. You just wanted to finally see some sun so you could enjoy the warmer months. Winter felt like it had never really ended. 

Mercifully, you eventually made it into the station, after ducking and weaving through the dithering tourists that lingered outside the prestigious institution in which you worked. You shook your head, hoping some of the water that had drenched your face and hair would at least fly off and prevent you from sitting on a crowded tube while soaked to the bone. You brought your arms around you, suddenly aware of how unpleasantly cold you felt after getting so wet in the rain.

But fortunately, as you descended deep beneath the city to the platform, the temperature rose. The tunnels, far below the city, had been built long ago; with their poor ventilation, they retained all the heat generated by the crowds. Sometimes it could be stuffy and feel as though there was no air, but today you were weirdly appreciative of the quirks of the tube.

Your momentary appreciation for the mass transportation system soon disappeared though, when you finally emerged onto the platform. There was a seemingly endless sea of bodies, crowding into every available space. You took a deep breath and squeezed between them, taking advantage of several confused tourists to position yourself just behind the yellow line in a spot that you knew would be in a prime location for the doors when the tube finally pulled up.

You tapped your foot impatiently as you stood on a crowded platform waiting for the tube to finally arrive, surrounded by the terrible din of an unappealing combination of annoyingly loud tourists and stressed-out commuters. To top off your miserable day, the line you needed to take to get home was suffering from delays, a fact the irritating trill voice of the announcer kept reminding you. They were sorry if it caused you inconvenience – of course it did! The empty apologies did nothing to quell the pounding in your head.

You were sick of crowds and noise, you had endured more than enough of it for one day. Work had been so busy that at one point, you felt as though your head was going to explode from all the tedium. The gradual buzzing in your head that you felt when you were annoyed had quietly begun in the early morning and had just gotten louder and louder throughout the day. You were exhausted. 

The rumble of the train finally hurtling through the tunnel towards you was for a moment, you were convinced, the greatest noise you had ever heard. You took a few deep breaths in preparation before it finally pulled up, now was time to fight your way through the sea of limbs and bodies to cram yourself inside the sweatbox on tracks that would take you to the comfort of your own home. To Mando. The man who helped pick you up whenever you were feeling down, without ever being able to know the impact he was having on your life.

It was the thought of how your heart would leap when you started the next episode in your rewatch and first saw his shiny form sauntering across your screen that seemed to carry you through the crowds you usually detested without draining too much of your dwindling energy reserves. You still winced, though, as you clambered aboard the sweltering carriage that was already likely too full to accommodate any more passengers. You knew there was no getting around it. This was just the reality of living in a major city like London. It was you who had been so determined to move here, after all. Eventually, after a lot of shuffling, you found yourself face-to-face with the dark brown musty jacket that belonged to a man who seemingly had not been acquainted with the wonders of deodorant. 

You fixed your gaze on the ceiling above you and tried to imagine yourself anywhere but here. You pictured Mando scything through a group of bad guys and imagined you were as strong as him. You reminded yourself over and over that this would not last long; there were only a couple of stops to a major train station, meaning the crowd would thin and you would hopefully get some more peace far away from the man’s musty jacket. You just about held it together for the next few stops, wishing you were already at home. You visualised the euphoria of finally walking through the door to your apartment, ready to change into comfortable clothes and settle down to watch your favourite show. Unfortunately, your illusion was constantly shattered by the crowds in the carriage with you.

Finally, though, you arrived at the stop where most crowds would depart and with the worst of the crowds having departed the tube, you were able to find a seat facing the window. Although there wasn’t much to see in the tunnels, you knew with every rattle that you were closer to home. You briefly considered the possibility that if your fellow travellers knew that sometimes, the only thing that got you through the day was knowing that you could come home and watch an episode of The Mandalorian, they would dismiss you as a pathetic loser. But you supposed that people coped in other ways, with harmful and destructive habits that caused pain to other people. You were not harming anyone with your passion and love for The Mandalorian, even if you knew it was not the most socially acceptable hobby for a grown woman.

Despite how sad your routine would probably sound to most people, the bond between you and The Mandalorian was stronger than any disparaging remarks that could come your way. Indeed, there were very few people in your life who truly understood the love you had for that show. Oh sure, there were casuals you had encountered, like your friend and colleague Tom, who was also a viewer of The Mandalorian – at least you had someone to occasionally discuss the latest episodes with. 

But your chats with your workmate were nothing deeper than how many people Mando had taken out in the latest episode and whether one day he could be seen on the same level as Vader in terms of iconic Star Wars characters. It was all very surface level and you felt reasonably sure, despite your closeness, that Tom would be at best bemused by your online activity and contemplate involving some kind of local authority at worst. Better that some things were kept secret.

Fortunately, you had a community of people online who unquestionably got it. You had them to talk to about the show that had become such a big part of your life. The Mandalorian had come to you at a difficult time in your life, a time when you most needed it. Recent years had not been kind to you, as they hadn’t been for most people. With global pandemics and both man-made and natural catastrophes, there were plenty of horrors awaiting you at life’s every turn. But you were so grateful that you had the show you loved so much and the people you had found because of it to help see you through. 

It had seemed that you were destined to find it at the exact moment when you did. At one of your lowest points, Mando had been there, with his deep voice and confident swagger to soothe you on your darkest days. To lose yourself for a few precious moments at the end of each difficult day and just watch the character that you loved so much flying around space, fighting bad guys and leaving each place better than he found it was deeply engrossing and comforting to you.

It didn’t matter to you that you did not have the faintest idea about what the man behind the helmet looked like. To you, The Mandalorian was the perfect sci-fi character. You had grown up loving the galaxy far far away and all things Star Wars, always keeping up with the latest releases and discussing them with your family and friends, but you would never have considered yourself a superfan who knew everything about it. It was not until you had started watching the show about the lone bounty hunter that a switch in your brain was flipped and you became completely, hopelessly obsessed with it. The musical score captured the mood perfectly and complimented the stunning visuals, the wide shots of landscapes as your favourite character travelled across whatever planet he found himself on that week, flying through the galaxy in his beloved Razor Crest. Every time you listened to music from the show – you were rarely seen without headphones, they were seemingly glued to your head – it was as though you could imagine yourself pacing through the galaxy alongside Mando. It was a way to get inside his head, imagine his emotions and how he carried himself.

You had been a little late to the party, only watching the first season after it had already aired in its entirety. But you had more than made up for lost time, completely immersing yourself in the world. You were pretty sure you had read absolutely everything about him and memorised the scant details that you knew about his life. Part of the allure of the show was how mysterious the character was himself. No one had ever seen his face nor did anyone know his real name, he was simply known as Mando. His need for secrecy was necessitated by the ancient Creed he belonged to, that followed a strict way of rules. Mando would never bend or break them for anyone, no matter how much fans fantasised about being the one to finally pull the lone gunslinger out of his shell and break through the harsh emotional walls he had put up for himself. 

After you had finished watching the first season, you joined the online fandom and quickly met a group of like-minded fans who were just as obsessed with all things Mandalorian as you were. You had found your tribe; you found solace in your online friends. They all shared the same passion for the show in a way that none of your friends in real life understood. The first person you had ever really spoken to had grown to be your closest friend Ria. You still remembered how nervous you were about speaking to her. She was a popular author who wrote many of the most well-received fanfics about Mando that appeared online after the first season had aired. But after you had nervously left your username on social media in her comment section, you found that she was just as lovely and welcoming as you had hoped when you began talking to her. After all, you were both, by definition, nerds who most people would see as losers for being so obsessed with one character. There was no need for hierarchy or competition here. 

After meeting Ria, she introduced you to some of her friends and you had all joined a group chat where you seemed to message each other constantly. On the train on the way to work, at lunch, last thing at night… there was always someone there to chat with about Mando. It helped that you were spread out across so many different times, all the way from Australia to Argentina and many places in between. The anticipation you had all felt for season two had reached a fever pitch before it was aired and, thankfully, it had lived up to all expectations. Speculating about what was to come in each episode with your online friends had been incredibly exciting. Not knowing what was coming next, who Mando would have to find or where he had to travel had been thrilling. After you had seen the first season, there had not been long to wait for the second season, which was released within a year. But now, there had been no new episodes for a few months as they worked on the next season. The wait was agonising, but your friends were helping you through.

Every single one of you in this group chat had undergone, at various stages, an identical process where you became completely enamoured by this same character, finding yourselves thoroughly charmed by his swagger and mystery. Each one of you, despite the distance that separated you, had found yourselves falling down the rabbit hole and becoming completely obsessed with the lone bounty hunter from a secretive warrior society, bound to never reveal his name or face to a single soul. 

The casting had been perfect… because just like the character on the show: in real life, you had absolutely no idea who the actor behind The Mandalorian was. Not a single one of you had any idea who portrayed Mando. His identity had been kept a complete secret – with the most watertight NDAs in history, you suspected – which was a highly unusual move in Hollywood. You were sure whoever he was must have a good reason for it. After the popularity of the first season and the viral phenomenon it had become, you couldn’t help but suspect that the man who played Mando, whoever he was, was probably extremely thankful for his decision to stay out of the limelight. You were sure that he would have been subjected to insane levels of scrutiny from the media and fans of the show. Indeed, even without his name and face being public knowledge, there was still plenty of that. 

Sometimes you felt a little sad that you would never get to hear about Mando from the actor’s perspective. Other cast members gave interviews and attended cons, but there was no way to ever get that interaction with your favourite character, the one you cared about the most. Although you remained in the dark both about his identity and the reasoning behind all the secrecy, you respected whatever reason he had for hiding it. After all, you knew for certain that there was no one else on the planet who could have played Mando as well as the actor who was portraying him. With his confident walk and deep, gravelly voice, he was already an icon without even knowing it.

Despite your respect for the actor behind Mando – you never really joined in with the speculation unless it was a joke. The trend #beyonceismando had been your favourite example of that. But sadly, most fans of the show did not share your restraint. Some of your friends could even be guilty of taking it a little too far sometimes, but you let it go. Life was too short to go around policing what other people did on the internet. Besides, you knew your friends well enough to feel confident that they could never be truly malicious. 

Due to the actor’s anonymity, speculation reached dizzying levels that you sometimes worried could be too much for anyone to live up to – you had seen every possible theory online. To you, online speculation should be fun without turning into something creepy and invasive. It was a fine line. A line that you did your best to tread, remembering there was ultimately a human being at the centre of the speculation. Your friends could let themselves go a bit more, but you tried your best to reign it in. 

The secret identity of Mando’s actor led to all kinds of wild theories. Some swore that he was actually a she, there was a woman underneath the suit and that was why Disney had to keep it secret. Others insisted that Mando was really an alien, with super strength and abilities straight out of Star Wars. There was also a sizable majority who believed the reason for his secretive identity was because the actor was straight out of the army and had killed thousands in real life. Speculation ran particularly wild on social media: everyone hoped that their favourite actor was somehow the man behind the helmet, even if their schedules did not line up and their voices did not match, which led to more theories that his voice was being altered somehow to conceal his identity. That particular theory meant everyone could now imagine their particular favourite actor was behind the character that had become such an iconic figure in pop culture.

Indeed, most of The Mandalorian’s appeal to the general public was the mystery and the speculation as to his true identity. Some people only watched every episode, thinking that would finally be the week he removed his helmet and their theory would prove to have been the correct one all along. Some people scrutinised every single shot, wondering if the mask had slipped for even a second. People had even tried to hack into the CCTV cameras of the studios where the seasons were being filmed.

You couldn’t lie and say that you didn’t enjoy indulging with your online friends. You had spent countless hours talking to them, laughing at their attempts to piece together his identity from the scantest of information. They scrutinised the internet for images to compare his build and height compared with other known actors who were in the right age range. They were convinced that perhaps the way he held himself – the gait of his walk, the stance he took with his hands on his hips, the way he often shifted his weight on one leg – could give them clues as to his identity that they were so desperate to crack. You left them to it, laughing at how they could turn the smallest things into some kind of full-blown theory and proof. But to you, Mando was just as amazing without you ever knowing anything about who he was beneath the helmet. You loved the show and the character much more than you loved the online theories.

Ultimately, watching the speculation unfold was all good fun (at least for you) and proved to be a welcome distraction that helped you to get through the horrors of being in your mid-twenties. Like the situation you found yourself in now – having to exit the tube and make food after a long day of work. 

Daydreaming about Mando and the friends you had made had passed the time perfectly, your stop was next and you couldn’t wait to finally be off the tube with all of its furious rattling. Thankfully, by the time you made it to street level, the rain had ceased. The humidity had increased in its place, though and any remaining dampness on your clothes from your earlier drenching magically evaporated in the hot air.

Only the stairs up to your apartment separated you from Mando now, and you felt the final energy reserves draining as you ascended them. You sighed as you turned the key and pushed the door open, both in relief at finally being home after such a difficult day and pure exhaustion. 

There was nothing you wanted more than to sloth out in front of the TV and watch your favourite space cowboy do his thing on your screen. But unfortunately, you were an adult. No one would magically appear with a plate of food, much as you would have appreciated it. You headed into the kitchen to begin preparing your food. You wondered what Mando would be like in the kitchen (everything came back to him eventually) – did he even eat? You had never seen it on screen, at least. You wondered if he even could eat under the helmet. Perhaps you’d text Ria about that later, and see her thoughts. Maybe she’d even write a oneshot based on it and gift it to you. 

As you stood there in your small kitchen, stirring the ingredients in the pan that would constitute your dinner – you realised just how this show had invaded every crevice of your brain. The Mandalorian had undeniably entered your brain in a way that made you think of it almost constantly. Sometimes, when you were walking around on your lunch break, you would imagine whether anyone you passed in the street could be the man that you were so enamoured by. You felt certain that you’d recognise Mando’s broad shoulders anywhere, even if you were right next to him. But it was a fruitless task, one that you knew deep down you would never get answers to. It wasn’t like he was just going to magically appear next to you one day or anything.

With your dinner plated up, you made your way to the front room to eat in your preferred position – on the sofa, in front of the TV. Sure, being an adult was hard sometimes but it meant that you got to indulge in little luxuries like this. Your family would probably freak out if they saw how you ate – hunched over on the couch, squealing with a mouth full of food over scenes you had watched dozens of times before – but you didn’t care. 

As you flopped down on the couch, ready to watch another episode of The Mandalorian while eating your dinner, your phone buzzed with a message from one of your best online friends. You had met Ria shortly after you had felt compelled to make an account after finishing the first season of The Mandalorian, but you had yet to meet in person. That was all going to change very soon, though: she was flying in to attend a convention with you next week. The promise of not only finally meeting your best friend, but also getting to spend time surrounded by others who loved The Mandalorian just as much as both of you did at the convention, had honestly kept you going recently. It was the subject of the con that was the reason for Ria’s messages:

[thisistheslay] 17:57: OMG! OMG! There’s gonna be a Mando panel at the con next week. WE HAVE TO GO!!

You tapped out a reply:

[ilovemando] 17:57: what panel? and when?

[thisistheslay] 17:58: Literally the first day at 2pm. It’s called ‘The Man behind the Mandalorian: Exploring the Identity of the Galaxy’s Best Bounty Hunter.’ We NEED to be there, like you don’t understand!!

[thisistheslay] 17:59: HELLO bestie, what if HE’S THERE! What if they finally unveil who he is!!

You put your phone down on your lap and let out a small laugh as you rolled your eyes. Ria was constantly convinced that Mando was finally going to reveal his identity. It was based on pure speculation at worst and half-baked rumours at best. It had been an ongoing debate between the two of you throughout your friendship, you doubted that Mando would ever reveal himself. He had left it this long, why would he choose to reveal his identity now? But it was all in good fun, after all. You knew how much Ria truly loved the show and Mando. Just like you, for Ria, this speculation was all a bit of fun. She wasn’t one of the toxic people who said they would never watch another episode if the actor who played Mando turned out to be ugly. Yes, unbelievably, that was something that you had actually seen people write publicly online, for others to see. Maybe even the man who played Mando himself. It made you feel sick, they didn’t deserve him or the show. 

You texted back:

[ilovemando] 18:03: oh i do, but not like you. yeah we’ll go… don’t be disappointed when mando doesn’t show tho

[thisistheslay] 18:04: No he’s going to be there! I can just FEEL it!!

[ilovemando] 18:05: ok sure, whatever u say. gotta eat but i’ll message you later

You really did have to go. No distractions would come between you and an episode of The Mandalorian, especially not while eating your dinner. As you sat back and watched the episode you had seen dozens of times before – in this one, Mando was tasked with hunting down a group of rogue mercenaries on a prison ship – your mind wandered back to Ria’s messages. You knew she was just being her usual ridiculous self, losing it over crumbs in an exaggerated, ironic way… but you couldn’t help but wonder about what you would do if her words came true. What if you did, one day, come face to face with Mando? What would you say? Would you even realise when he was in the same room as you, would it be an obvious, earth-shattering feeling? Or something far more subtle?

It was a ridiculous topic. But despite yourself, it was one you spent the rest of the evening ruminating over. The prospect of attending the con was nerve-wracking already – it was going to be a large, crowded event with many people in an unfamiliar environment. That was already setting your nerves on edge, even without the prospect of Mando being there. But thinking that there was perhaps the smallest chance that you could be about to lay eyes upon the man who brought your favourite character to life…

Well, that was a whole other level of nerves. 

Next Chapter

[gulmoregirls]

Motivated by my own 21st birthday yesteday, I decided to (re)watch the famous episode in S6 in which Rory turns 21.

Looking at it now, I can't help but feel like she was, indeed, so young. I get the entire "rory gilmore downfall" thing and agree that that version of the character was just... off. However, I really feel like they could've made an entire arc about rory losing herself and then finding herself. After all, is what she deserves as one the leads of the show.

Now being her age, I understand better how weird it is to be in your early twenties. Expectations, endless possibilites, the burden of having to actually make the choices for yourself. Rory's in a different environment, questioning the lables that were very prematurely put on her. She's not living the life she had envisioned for herself, turns out she's not good at the one thing she thought she had, all of her friends are doing stuff for themselves - while she, who was always on a pedestal, feels lost.

In a sense, taking Rory from that pedestal was key to her character and to the show. Making her have a identity crisis while entering adulthood and the real world makes absolute sense. It doesn't make her spoiled, or terrible, or mean. It makes her a confused 20yo girl, and speaking as another teenager in my twenties, it does get weird!! I just hate the way everything happened, and how she had little to no insight on it, no meaningful conversations with peers, how under developed it was - to the point that it felt like an individual flaw of rory's character, when it could've been so powerful to a young women audience to have someone relatable get lost but find herself again.

Again, I'm not the show writer, and, as much as I wish Rory had been done better, I can only stick to what is canon while annalizing the episode. So here are my biggest thoughts (as if this text is not long enough)

I feel like there's a reason why they wrote Logan as unaware of Rory's birthday, specially because it plays no role in a fight, or has to do with a lack in their relationship. It's not that Logan forgot, or that he should've known. It's purely that Rory didn't tell him.

In my opinion, it symbolizes what becomes a theme during this part of the show, which is "past rory" vs "current rory" and which one is the "real" one, if it's one of them. Logan not knowing about her birthday equals Emily throwing her a big birthday party with a drink Rory doesn't like but that has her name, or inviting random people she doesn't care about. Equals Logan getting her a Birkin bag, a symbol of power, when she didn't even know the brand existed. The parallel between the dream she used to have with her mother (the trip to vegas, playing 21, buying 21 things) and the reality of their fallout and rory surrounded by exactly what lorelai ran from. Money not being able to buy traditions.

Adding to that, the next episode is the famous one, in which Jess shows up and does more than delivering a passionate speech that, almost twenty years later, would become a tiktok trend. He actually wishes her a late happy birthday. He remembers it. Either intentionally or not, it adds another layer to the amount of parallels rory is facing.

Obviously, Jess knowing something Logan didn't doesn't make him better, nor it changes anything. But in a way, it shows a gap between past and present in a different way (one maybe even more intersting than just comparing "study freak" to "yale dropout", because people change over time), once we're talking about the relationships she's building, and how she wants them to be.

On a side note, I theorize that an explanation could be that Rory and Logan's relationship is very present/future-oriented. "Future" not in the sense of building a future together, a far away future. But "Future" as "the next adventure", "the next challenge", "the next trend". The way his character was introduced already shows that, and it was very important for Rory to let go a little, but I feel like it became easy for her, amidst her twenties-crisis, to live too much like logan, trusting that things would fall into place, relying on priviledges she had never had before, forgetting herself in the process, because actually thinking about the situation would make her spiral.

I guess my point is that talking about Rory's past was not a priority - symbolized about how he doesn't even know her birthday. It worked well for them, as Rory was unconsciously doing it herself, hiding it because remembering meant actually getting in touch with who she used to be, and how things were changing, and questioning everything. Once she was able to taste how living was like for Logan - both because of him and because of her grandparents, that shared similar values and priviledges - it was easy ignoring the past, exactly because it was a big contrast that, maybe, meant that she needed to take a step back and to really think about what version she wanted to be.

(not that it matters, but it almost feels like their talks, ideas and challenges were very logan-coded, once rory was eager to ignore aspects of her life and he was eager to show her the perks and fun of his. on the other hand, her relationship with jess was very rory-coded, because everything in stars hollow brought her memories and stories she wanted to share, whereas jess was the one who wanted to escape himself, always failing to communicate, guard always up, even for small things)

In her party episode, Richard, Emily and Lorelai discuss about Rory, and have different views.

To Emily, they haven't failed her - not until she repeats Lorelai's story, showing up pregnant. Until that, there's still time and efforts. She doesn't care Rory is unhappy, or lost, or confused. She just cares about keeping her under her watch, thinking that, by doing so, she won't become like Lorelai.

To Richard, they have failed her by giving her everything she needed to run away from her responsabilities and her old self. He says something similar to what Jess later tells Rory, about how it isn't her to drop out of Yale and be in the DAR. However, he feels like that can be mended with the right incentive - a new car, a new house, in exchange for the old Rory back.

Lorelai, very wisely, knows that if the "old Rory" is bought, it is actually not her daughter. She knows the problem is not Rory not being in school, but Rory not even *wanting* to go back.

Still, none of them actually say any of that to her face. Having Jess be the one doing it is one of the few nice parts of that season, because it makes sense. He knows her, not an idealized version, but the flawed, real one she showed him. He returns exactly to show her he made something for himself exactly like she believed he could, reminding rory of how she can trust her own judgment, and how she can make something for herself as well. He doesn't hesitate in comparing how different the two versions of her are, even if he might be wrong or sound jealous. Mostly, he points out that it is not normal for rory gilmore to ignore her mom. Everyone from her past could see it, and someone needed to say it. For some reason, Lorelai, Lane and even Paris couldn't, and Jess checked all the boxes.

[sometimesanalice]

"(She absolutely knew what she was doing with that one, especially since now there’s a recently tattooed BB tucked next to them 🤗)" OKAY 👀 was this a surprise wedding gift or did Bradley know the whole time SG was getting it?

Ahh! I love you caught this! One of my favorite things about SG is just how much she loves to rile up Bradley. She knows exactly how to play him.

Her tattoo was something Bradley was always curious about, and he’d find himself trying to catch a peek of it, but she usually isn’t wearing anything too high cut or revealing on the beach. And after the get together, he likes that he’s the only one who knows exactly what it looks like and where it is.

And the first time she wore the green floral swimsuit (he likes her green floral dress so much, she thinks he’d like it’s as a swimsuit too) on the beach that was a bit higher cut than she’d ever worn with her butterflies on display for the first time ever, it has him nearly losing his mind. (The man has no issue talking dirty in her ear about all the things he wants to do to her and leaving her all kinds of flushed and flustered)

More for you! (And a little mock up of her newest addition!)

She knows how much he likes her tattoo. I think it started out as a cheeky little intrusive “what if” thought, and then became something she couldn’t stop thinking about how he would react if she got his initials tattooed on her.

They didn’t get to go on their honeymoon right away, so she wanted to do something in her own way to celebrate their marriage. She reaches out to one of her graphic design friend as commissions them to draw up the dainty lettering she envisioned.

And on their one month anniversary of being Mr and Mrs Bradshaw, she tells Bradley she’s been thinking about getting her butterflies touched up a bit and asks if he want to go to the appointment with her, which of course he does. (What he doesn’t know is that the appointment had been booked for months)

After the stencil is applied she has him come over and look at it, just wanted “an extra set of eyes”. He is briefly distracted by the curve of her hip and the untied strings of the bikini bottoms she was wearing. But when he sees “BB” and then little pleased smirk on her face, he knows he’s done for.

The second he sits back down, trying to act like his world hasn’t been totally rocked, he’s pulling out his phone and googling “how soon can I touch a new tattoo” (it’s the longest week of his life, but he finds other ways to show her how much he likes it 😏)

[linkspooky]

I've followed this blog for years now. What I find most interesting about your analysis is how you tie "revenge is bad" back to your Bad Victims TM stuff. Now, I still enjoy straight revenge stories but I think you helped me enjoy deconstructions/cycle of revenge tales even more than I like the simple stuff. As a convert, I want to ask a meta meta question: how do you feel about people who use straight revenge stories as catharsis?

Well, the idea of Catharsis ties into my bad victims stuff TM. On one hand I dislike straightforward revenge stories where revenge is the solution to the problem and not the problem in and of itself. On the other hand, like I went to great length to explain with Yun, I hate denying the sympathy to a victim who's been pushed so far that seeking revenge is their only means of coping.

In the first place, like I said revenge tends to follow protagonist centered morality. When a protagonist does it, it's justice, when an antagonist does it, it's revenge and they need to let go. Telling someone to let go without acknowledging their hurt feelings and doing something to address those or even reaching out to try to show them another way is incredibly dismissive of those feelings.

Shadow of Kyoshi tells us that revenge is bad, but punishing Yun in the form of putting him down like a mad dog before he hurts anyone else is okay. As I said, what exactly is the difference here between punishment and revenge? Where's the fairness in letting Yun's abusers redeem themselves but deciding that Yun is too far gone to live on. Like hmm, maybe the reason his abusers want to seek redemption and Yun doesn't is because they weren't regularly abused by all their teachers then abandoned nearly killed, dragged into the spirit world for weeks and then denied help when they finally escaped.

Yun has to deal with all the trauma his abusers inflicted on him whereas, his abusers just have to deal with their own personal feelings of guilt. To prioritize their feelings and well-being over the pain of the person they hurt, and criticize Yun's response to his abuse is incredibly tone deaf of the book. If I saw my friend siding with my abusers and insisting that I was the problem I definitely wouldn't want to back down.

All of this to say there is an element to catharsis in every revenge story, to strike back at the people who hurt you. I also think it's wrong to insist victims be morally pure and blame them for lashing out. Especially for people like Kohaku and Yun where they have been pushed so far that revenge is the only thing that's giving them a reason to still live.

I also feel like it's incredibly tragic that Kohaku in particular can't envision any future for herself, or any escape from the pain of being a doll and the only way out of her situation is to hurt others. That Yun feels like all of the things he suffered were for nothing, and his dreams of helping people are all pointless and the only thing he can get is justice upon those who hurt something. That Yun is so damaged he threw away his desire to help people, which was a very significant part of who he is. It's the same with Kohaku, she's a very loving protector, she loves Akiha and Hisui very much but not only does she resolve to kill Akiha (something that ultimately destroys her in the long run) but she also has decided that Hisui is better off without her.

All of this to say that catharsis is an important element of any tragedy. Either individuals seeking catharsis, or the catharsis that's brought about by watching someone like Kohaku or Yun give into anguish and despair. The catharsis of seeing your own internal pain represented on stage. The catharsis of seeing characters lash out like you wish you could, or the catharsis of seeing a character react in a very human way and fall apart when we are often told that we have to be strong at all times and swallow our grief.

Tragedies operate on the principal of catharsis, this is outlined very well in Aristotle's poetics.

Catharsis is a metaphor used to describe the effects of true tagedy on the spectator (derived from the ter katharsis meaning purgation or pufication). The purpose of tragedy is to arouse "terror and pity" and thereby effect the catharsis of these emotions.

While purging something means getting rid of it, purifying something means getting rid of the worse or baser parts of it. It is possible that tragedy purifies the feelings themselves of fear and pity. These arise in us from the frustration of our real lives and the emotions we cannot cope with, which we then can vicariously experience through the characters in the stories we tell.

The catharsis in a revenge tragedy comes from both the horror we feel about the circumstances that pushed a person to their revenge, Yun's abuse by his teachers who he was so desperate to please, Kohaku's years of sexual abuse she had to endure to protect her sister. While at the same time it evokes pity for the people who are lashing out. Even if you condemn Kohaku for hurting others, most people's response is to want her to stop hurting otheres and swaddle her in a warm blanket instead. In fact Kohaku's ending is so sad, because both the reader and Shiki don't want to see a longeterm victim of sexual abuse kill herself because she believes there's no hope in living.

So even when revenge is temporarily satisfying in these stories and evokes catharsis, it's purging you of ugly emotions not positive ones. It's validating to see the hate and anger acted out by characters on the stage, but that's not like a good way to deal with your problems. Most revenge stories have characters at least partially succeed with their revenge. The count of monte cristo takes out most of his targets. Yun successfully kills Jianzhu. Kohaku is able to murder both of her rapists. Toya reveals his abuser's crimes on live television. Then it usually escalates to the revenge spiraling out of control, the Count almost kills a baby, Yun attacks a friend's mother (and he was right for that), Kohaku kills Akiha. Toya blames and decides to hurt Shoto who is completely innocent out of envy.

That's a tragedy though, you asked about the catharsis of watching straightforward revenge stories that don't depict the part two. That begin and end with the revenge, where revenge is the solution. Stories like Kill Bill or Maki Zen'in killing the Zen'in Clan where revenge is depicting as empowering.

I don't really have a problem with those stories even if they don't personally interest me. I definitely understand the enjoyment and escapist fantasy of being Toya and being able to hurt your abusers right back especially in a world where most abusers just get to walk away from what they did with little consequence. I also think there's a fine line between like, revenge, and just standing up for yourself and fighting back against your abusers and people confuse the latter for the former. They also get too preachy and expect victims to remain morally pure, and condemn any fighting back even when it's necessary for their survival.

I watch horror movies and my favorite genre of horror is slasher. Horror movies are known for their weirdly regressive politics at time. When I watch a horror movie I don't think that teens who have sex are morally impure and should be punished. I watch horror movies for catharsis too, to purge myself of fear. Not every slasher movie I watch is a deep analysis of horror, like say how The Shining has a lot to say about addiction and domestic violence. Sometimes I am just watching to see a bunch of teenagers get hunted down by a guy in a mask.

This is again a readily recognizable dramatic form, called the horror story, or in a recent fashion, the mad-slasher movie. The thrill of fear is the primary object of such amusements, and the story alternates between the build-up of apprehension and the shock of violence. Again, as with the tear-jerker, it doesn’t much matter whether it ends happily or with uneasiness, or even with one last shock, so indeterminate is its form. And while the tearjerker gives us an illusion of compassionate delicacy, the unrestrained shock-drama obviously has the effect of coarsening feeling. Genuine human pity could not co-exist with the so-called graphic effects these films use to keep scaring us. The attraction of this kind of amusement is again the thrill of strong feeling, and again the price of indulging the desire for that thrill may be high. [SOURCE]

Of course there's also the matter of genre and expectations. When I'm watching a horror story, I know what I'm getting into. I'm not bothered to see victims like Junpei die in Jujutsu Kaisen (even though I've written like a massive fanfiction AU where he lives) because I know I'm reading a horror story. Whereas, My Hero Academia killing its victims is incredibly tone deaf because it's supposed to be an optimistic manga about heroes saving people.

This is Jujutsu Kaisen, this is the manga gege would write if he were allowed to write in a seinen magazine.

Kyoshi killing Yun doesn't work at all because it clashes with the tone. The same book goes to great extents to redeem one of Yun's abusers who is an adult who chose to do all those things, but at the same time doesn't offer Yun the same chance, an orphaned child. It even comes off as punching down, because Kyoshi who we're supposed to believe is an ally to crimminals and outcasts like Daofei and grew up poor murders another orphaned child while giving a privileged rich noble lady like Hei-Ran a chance to redeem herself.

It's ridiculous that Endeavor faces no legal consequences except being forced to retire due to a career ending injury and still has the support of all of his sidekicks, Hawks and his wife, while Toya doesn't get the chance to redeem himself and gets a slow horrific death while hooked up to life support. Toya who was once again, a child, who was homeless and living on the streets for years while Endeavor was an extremely rich man and made the decision to purchase a bride and abuse his family as an adult.

Honestly, even though I'm against straightforward revenge I was rooting for Toga to kill Hawks because there was no other way he was going to face any consequences for his actions.

If I'm watching The Princess Bride I cheer when Inigo Montoya kills his enemy because I know I'm watching a fairy tale. Kill Bill is my least favorite Tarantino Movie (my favorite is Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, second favorite Inglorious Bastards) but I understand the appeal of people who do like it.

If people want to watch a simple revenge story for Catharsis that's totally fine. My tastes aren't much better my favorite genre of horror is slasher. On the other hand I think the problem arises when people who only watch stories for their personal catharsis or escapism don't allow room for other people's interpretations.

Like, if you don't think Azula deserves redemption because you deeply empathize with the way that she hurt Zuko go ahead. I don't have the right to tell you how to feel about certain characters. Abuse is also a touchy subject and the definition of abuse depends from person to person.

However, if I'm making a logical argument based upon the text Azula would make a logical next step in Zuko's redemption because one, the writing goes out of its way to show that Zuko had a support system in Iroh and the others and Azula never had that same support system. Two, it's a parallel for Iroh redeeming himself by coming to care for Zuko and being that support. Three, it's Zuko showing his emotional growth by giving someone else the chance to redeem themselves just like he was shown that chance. Four one of Azula's main writers Aaron Ehasz literally said that's what they would have written if they got a season 4 greenlit.

If you come onto my post and be like "No, I don't think Azula deserves redemption. Zuko doesn't owe her shit." I can't argue with that.

That's just like... your opinion man.

So, if you read straight up revenge stories for catharsis, I am glad you are reading something that makes you happy. If it helps you feel validated for your emotions then that's great! I just think everyone should be mindful of the fact that people look for different things in stories. I personally don't just read stories for what makes me feel good, I like stories that challenge you. Which is why I like the idea of Zuko having to learn to forgive Azula, because it's more challenging than the simple answer of "Zuko should just cut all the abusers out of his life." If you think that Zuko should be able to cut her off though like I said that's just like your opinion man.

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #6

Department of Magical Violations, here we go!

"With a pair quite strange!" Got it, got it.

Ooh, this title card implies Jorgen~!

SLKDJF, did Wanda become a seahorse immediately after they were complaining they spent so long as fish last episode?

Whoa, we're already 100 wishes forward in the future? That leaves a lot of wiggle room. Show me the moon phase; you know you want to...

Yep, she likes the fish guy from the theme. His name is Kennueth.

That cat photo is driving me up the wall. Is it Mittens, who hangs around Dinkleberg? I really feel like I've seen this cat...

Oh, Jorgen's gotten older! As he should have, I suppose, though you wouldn't think this would have been such a significant time jump for him. I'm not sure I love it.

sdfklj, I'm glad we're sticking with "Jorgen is in charge of godparents." Like... that man has no legal rights to Fairy World. He's over godparents and that has always kinda been his thing.

His braces are too big...

I'm glad SOMEONE here is yelling at them for not filing godparent paperwork. You sniped someone else's godkid assignment, you dummies!!

Wish Inspection! It's back! THE DMV! It's also back?? ... With fewer flying cars this time, but... wow. Didn't expect that one.

"Tedious structure and drab settings is my happy place" - Hazel, I know a race of magical beings you would love to hang out with.

I'm glad "I wish he had a trampoline instead" [of a parachute] turned out exactly the way I envisioned.

Jorgen has not changed at all, and he still loves dancing with bright lights around. I support him. I feel like they've not emphasized his sliced-off wings to new viewers, though.

Cookie: I know what you want. Hazel, who did not want a car:

I see where this is going.

Cosmo's cute pocket <3

Teacher's Pal

Nottttt sure it was a great idea to make one character's whole personality saying "Football," but let's see where it's going.

Aw, I like that Hazel's school has squirrels as a mascot since Timmy had the Squirrely Scouts.

... huh? was that Timmy?

Cosmo: Does she not know how a door works?

Tough talk for Fairies who like poofing doors away.

She likes mushrooms and anime... What a combo.

Having Dimmy as a nickname for the Dimmadomes is really gonna throw me off (Sounds like "Timmy").

Oof, did she wish for all the teachers to like her? And does that make the lady who doesn't like her... the principal? (Yes)

Wow, we are on a streak of brown and orange eyes. Who knew they were all hiding in Dimmadelphia?

... Is that Grey DeLisle / Grey Griffin voicing the principal? (It is!)

His shades are too big...

This is an attack against me specifically.

OKAY I thought I was going crazy during the quick glances earlier, but YES, that IS Timmy as the mascot! Oh, RIP...

He haunts history even when he's gone, as he should.

Bigfoot Club sounds like something Hazel's dad would want her to sign up for.

Okay, so it's end of 5th grade, so she's 10-turning-11?

OH, Wanda just called Hazel "squirt..." It's so similar to "sport." That's cute.

???

Where is Dev? Where is he?

Forget Dev- What is up with this kid?

Dev is running around somewhere, unsupervised. He just dipped out halfway through the episode. There were no teachers to make him stay and he's rich. I expect no less.

A little less upbeat and dramatic than the debut episode, but that's not a surprise. I'd say it fits the theme of the old show really well. I look forward to more, though I do think Jorgen's appearance wasn't pushed as far as it could've been. On the other hand, it's perfectly in character that he doesn't want to spook Hazel as much as he wants to spook Cosmo and Wanda.

Got through a bit faster than expected, so maybe a little more watching.

[rottenpumpkin13]

Why do you ship Gen and Cloud? Wouldn't they have torn each other apart in canon if they met?

(Just to be clear, I ship them post-canon and that's what I'm referring to here)

Maybe I'm biased because I'm a sucker for unconventional rare pairs, but just look at them. "The man who tried to obliterate the planet and ruined my life was your friend. Our best friends were close enough that they shared a sword that we both associate with them. You tried to kill Zack. You wanted to kill me at one point. But you were a victim of Shinra too, right? I want to hate you, but I can't. I pity you. We're both connected to Sephiroth and Jenova through the cells inside of us. It wasn't your fault. Where were you when Zack died? I want to hate you but I can't.

There's so many conflicting feelings on Cloud's part, and there's moments where all he sees in Genesis is Sephiroth in a different font.

And there's the desperation and curiosity on Gen's part because he just woke up and here's that same Infantryman who's cells he wanted all those years ago. Here's the same, puny kid who killed Sephiroth. More than once. He has Angeal's sword. He used Angeal's sword. Did he know Angeal? He definitely knew Zack. What are the odds, right? This man was friends with Zack, the same Zack you want to do right by now that you've been redeemed in the eyes of the goddess. Where is Zack? He died too? Suddenly he’s in a whole new world where his friends are gone, the city you used to live in doesn't exist anymore, and the only fragment you have left of that past is this man you barely know. But there's still a chance to redeem himself. If only Cloud would let him in so he could show him that he's different, that he's not the same man he once was.

Their interactions would NOT be boring let me tell you lol. It's not enemies to lovers exactly, more like forced proximity mixed with their contrasting personalities that would make for an interesting dynamic. Genesis is pompous and proud and never shuts up, but the only person who can make him shut up is Cloud’s sarcasm, bluntness and painful honesty.

Even if you can't picture them as a romantic pairing, they have the potential to be really good friends. "Beloved" by Sinnatious on ao3 does a really good job of showing how their friendship would develop first before the romance. You should definitely check it out in case you can't envision the pairing :)

[i-heart-hxh]

Hi! Your recent posts about Zoldycks got me thinking about something I was already mulling over, and stirred even more thoughts, sorry if my ramblings will get too much into headcanoning territory 🙏

I was thinking about the differences in Zoldyck children's personalities, and how much of is innate and how much is a result of conditioning.

Of course, it might just happen that Killua is naturally more rebellious than his siblings, but the way Silva treats him makes me wonder. Sure, Silva's very manipulative, but he does allow Killua to go out in the world, something that could potentially only strengthen his individualistic personality (and we see how Kikyo really doesn't like the idea of Killua in the wild). The needle prevents him from dangerous fights and fully protecting his friend(s), but it doesn't stop him from meeting new people, gaining new experiences.

Illumi says an assassin should be without passion and fire, focused only on the job, and it may be true... about what he was taught. I don't consider Illumi as a fully reliable source, especially with later evidences that he himself isn't the most stable person, but he's good at presenting himself as this emotionless perfect assassin.

So what I'm seeing there: Zoldyck children, other than Killua, are meant to be, for the lack of a better word, "employees". They're here to listen to orders, and just do their job without much thought. Both Illumi and Kalluto clearly conform to this idea, they don't show much emotion and treat the family as the priority. I feel like Milluki is kinda deemed as a failure, but even he takes the supporting role as a family "tech guy".

Meanwhile, Killua is meant to be the head of the family, The Leader. And what leader is passionless and obedient? It wouldn't make sense to completely break Killua's character, as his strong will could actually be the positive trait in that context. I think his training was more focused on shaping him in the "right" direction, eradicating his compassion, but keeping some of his individuality, and that's why he's so different from his siblings.

Hello!

This is a great bit of insight and well-worded--I agree with what you're saying here, and I have very similar lines of thought around what makes Killua a good candidate for leading the Zoldyck family and what disqualifies the other siblings, as well as what exactly the family is trying to foster in Killua.

I do definitely think that they want Killua to have some ability to think independently and make his own decisions (qualities of a good leader), which very well might be an aspect of why Silva allowed him to leave--along with Silva's confidence that the needle would do its job and bring him back sooner or later (and most likely disillusioned with friendship by then), of course. Killua having a mind of his own also might be part of why he was chosen as the heir in the first place--it may be an aspect of his "potential," though of course the specific way his individuality manifests is a problem for them. They're certainly trying to break him of his compassion and desire for friendship because those are the opposite of useful skills for an assassin, but I suspect they're trying to preserve his ability to lead the family and carefully consider options presented to him, so from their perspective it's a delicate balance they're trying to strike in how they raise and encourage him.

This is part of why I believe his upbringing must have involved a combination of being treated "well" (as usual, by Zoldyck standards) and being chastised and punished for the parts of him they consider unacceptable. Too much of being treated "well" and he wouldn't bend to what they want, but too much punishment might break his spirit in a way that's not desirable to them, so there must have been a constant back-and-forth on how to treat him in order for him to come out how they've envisioned. You see this tug-of-war in the Zoldyck arc with the different ways Zeno, Silva, and Kikyo behave with regards to Killua, and we even see some bickering about which is the "right" way to treat him--with Zeno having a somewhat hands-off approach and letting him free from being punished (being "soft" on him), Silva letting Killua go and having faith that he'll come back (via a devious set-up with the needle and blood vow), and Kikyo trying to keep Killua locked up where she has full control of him and his development.

I brought this up in a previous post, but I could see the training going too far with Illumi, and it's part of what leads to him being the way he is, both with regards to his instability and his extreme prioritization of the family.

I also agree that the other siblings come across as obedient, loyal to the family, and not possessing much independent will. Like you said, it's interesting to think about how much of their personalities are nature vs nurture. Under the extreme situations they're exposed to, the way they've been raised and treated must play a big role, though. I wonder at what point it's determined if a child is a candidate for being the heir or not, because that must majorly affect their treatment growing up.

Anyway, thanks for the thoughtful submission!