The Exorcists’ Masks of Virtue
The vast majority of Exorcists in Hazbin Hotel have a notable design element that other angels don’t: their masks are missing an eye. Specifically, the right eye.
I believe this is a reference to the Bible, Matthew 5:29. Jesus says, “If your right eye causes you to stumble, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.”
He’s being hyperbolic. Mr Free Healthcare was not pro-mutilation. What he means is that you have to be willing to make sacrifices to prevent sin. The context of the eye metaphor is him condemning adultery and warning that even something as easy, casual and small as a look full of lustful intent can lead to further, worse sin if you don’t notice your sin, hold yourself accountable for it and do the work to not let it influence your decisions. This will probably be hard. It could be very, very painful. Changing your perspective can feel as horrible as plucking out your eye, so many people can’t bring themselves to do it. But although it won’t feel that way in the moment, it’s healthier for our general wellbeing in the long run to abandon traits and behaviours that damage ourselves and/or others.
(You may notice that Jesus’s teaching that you can have sinned, redeem yourself by giving up sin and thus escape damnation is the founding principle of the Hazbin Hotel. You may also notice that it contradicts everything the Exorcists believe.)
The Exorcists seem to follow this idea of painfully excising badness for the sake of the greater good devoutly to the point of placing it above teachings like ‘Thou shalt not kill’, with their job being to remove sin, in the form of sinners, to protect Heaven. Hence the missing right eyes. They’re a declaration of moral righteousness and inability to stumble.
But the truth is that the Exorcists all have their right eyes. Their flawlessness is a facade. Underneath, they are untouched, think themselves morally untouchable and, as shown by their horror and outrage when even one of them is killed, would much rather be physically untouchable too. This perfectly represents their complete unwillingness to acknowledge their own faults, let alone improve. They are never the ones who sacrifice. They force the sinners to sacrifice and don’t compensate it with any salvation. They metaphorically rip out the sinners’ eyes, but still condemn their entire bodies as inherently, permanently sinful. So they’ll just have to do another Extermination to get the other eyes! And another one to cut off their right hands! And so on until there’s nothing left.
The only exception to the rule is Vaggie, both in appearance and character. Her mask has the left eye crossed out instead. Even before her expulsion, she’s set apart to the audience as an Exorcist who has the capacity to, shall we say, see a different side of things. Her mask having its ‘sinful’ right eye reflects her understanding that the Exorcist worldview is wrong.
When she almost kills a demon child, her hateful vision clears. She discards the part of herself that’s an unquestioning, merciless agent of death, terror and grief… and as punishment for what Lute perceives as treacherous weakness, gets her eye plucked out.
Of course Lute leaves her with only the ‘sinful’ eye. It brands Vaggie forever as the inversion, a perversion, of what the Exorcists are meant to be.
You know, all this talk of eye removal in the Bible reminds of another line - ‘an eye for an eye’. Adam directly quotes it in “Hell is Forever”. He uses it to frame the Exterminations as Old Testament-style punitive justice; the sinners did harm and so they receive it. But putting aside the debate about how ethical the concept of revenge is, the entire point of taking an eye for an eye is that it’s proportional. The punishment fits the crime. If someone cuts your eye out, you shouldn’t murder their whole family in front of them and then slowly disembowel them to death. That would be the sin of wrath. You should just make them pay without excessive pain or collateral damage. This is the fairest form of revenge.
The Exorcists don’t do that! The Exterminations aren’t proportional to the wrongs of all they hurt, nor was Vaggie’s brutal punishment equivalent to her extremely mild insubordination. Lute literally takes Vaggie’s eye, and more, after Vaggie does nothing to her! That’s the opposite of the phrase! Adam and his soldiers are wrathful and cruel, deriving satisfaction from others’ suffering. But they just can’t stop going on and on about how disgustingly evil the sinners are, in total hypocrisy… despite some of the sinners being far better people than the genocidal Exorcists are… it’s like they’re obsessed with specks of dust in the sinners’ eyes when they have massive logs stuck in their own. Oh hey, that’s in the Bible too!
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winter headcanons
Eddie thinks he can get though winter with his leather jacket and battle vest, always has always will. But when he is at Steve’s one day Steve throws him one of his winter coats demanding he puts it on in his mother hen way. Eddie puts it on, complaining it’s ruining his image but when he realised he can now go outside WITHOUT wanting to die from the cold his life is changed.
Steve ends up getting Eddie mittens, a huge scarf and a hat with ear flaps because he KNOWS Eddie feels the cold. And if it means Eddie goes around with rosy cheeks looking very cute well then everyone is a winner aren’t they?
Eddie teaches max about wrapping plastic bags around your feet to keep your socks dry if you don’t have winter boots. And how to keep the bags hidden. They give each other knowing looks when they see each other in the snow
Dustin doesn’t feel the cold. Ever. He can go around the entirety of winter in his tshirt and every time Steve sees him he slams a hat on his head and wraps him up in one of the scarves he’s knitted
Steve has also knitted Robin and Nancy one of those conjoined mittens that lets them hold hands inside the glove. They love it.
Eddie wants to make sure Steve is looked after too so whenever he stays over Eddie send him off to work with a full thermos of his hot drink of choice
Steve has a favourite pair of thick socks that he’s worn every winter and they are starting to show holes so eddie takes it upon himself to mend them with his sewing kit. He doesn’t tell Steve, just leaves them out for him one morning as Steve is heading out the door and eddie is still in bed. Steve stares at them and the newly embroidered ‘SH’ on each sock and feels warm for the rest of the day
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it is so vitally important to me that aziraphale and crowley not only love each other but choose to love each other.
i don’t want it to be fate. i don’t want it to be god’s will. i want it to be a conscious and continuous choice.
i want aziraphale choosing every day of his goddamn existence to love crowley and all that he is. i want aziraphale choosing to love crowley not in spite of being a demon, but because he is a demon. i want aziraphale choosing to love crowley’s curiosity and creative wonder. i want aziraphale choosing to love crowley’s love of plants and gardening.
i want crowley choosing to love aziraphale’s passion for books. i want crowley choosing to love aziraphale’s desire to do things the human way even if he could just miracle it. i want crowley choosing to love aziraphale’s angel-ness because it is a fundamental part of him.
i want aziraphale choosing to love everything about crowley and vise versa. and i want it to be a very conscious and intentional choice.
it being fate negates the entire point of the story. good omens is a love story between an angel and a demon, yes. but that’s not all that it is. it’s a story about two occult/ethereal beings who choose humanity over the great plan. two beings who choose the world over armageddon. and they make those choices because despite it all they have chosen to fall in love with the world and with humanity.
it only makes sense that they choose each other. that they choose their love. it being fate or god’s will ruins the foundational pillar of their relationship. that they choose each other over and over and over again. year after year, century after century, time and time again. they always choose. they choose the arrangement, they choose saving the other from harm, they choose lying to protect the other.
it is always a choice. and it better stay a choice or i am going to be so devastated.
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people are so quick to laugh at other people for taking extremely loaded and upsetting representation in media ~too seriously~, but also conflate the words of some of the most powerless marginalized people with censorship by the FUCKING US GOVERNMENT. it’s so disingenuous it’s so silencing it’s so fucking shitty
it also very much feels like the cultural moment we’re in right now, where bringing up issues rooted in deep irl power structures is automatically written off as oversensitive and reactionary. it’s just media, until it’s an example from real life—then it’s just not that serious, or it’s childish to draw those connections, or it’s censorship to bring it up in the first place. allusions to irl violence are chump change but irl violence is always an isolated incident. and no one cares that this attitude magically seems to exclusively benefit the extremely conservative worldview that holds power
like lmfao no i don’t think it’s your right or anyone’s right to cover your eyes to obviously shitty offensive media writing laden with cultural baggage…. so that you can ~just enjoy it~! does this say nothing about you when you jump to silence the critiques of folks who noticed the harmful shit that went over your head? hot take… media is actually made and consumed by human beings who live in a society
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