#I’m suing Gege who’s with me

[vita-divata]

Together again

[stardust-falling]

This is random, but having read all of that “SJ” stan’s arguments I’ve realized they’re basing a lot their characterizations on Feynite’s fic and QiJiu writing in the “I Wish You Were My Husband” verse. The whole YGY and LQG isolating SJ happens in that verse (although in-universe, SJ isn’t wholly innocent.) YGY micromanaging and believing the worst of SJ are things Feynite adds in to her version of YGY. It’s wild to me because I think that person formed a version of canon based off of a selection of fanfics and decided they were canon.

Ahhh see I’ve heard of this, and I’ve also suspected that their arguments come from fanon. Because, quite frankly, I’ve seen them a lot. I’ve seen *so many* things about SV that people consider to be canon, and fairly consistently too.

I don’t read popular fanfics for a reason.

Honestly I only read fic rarely in general. A lot of times I don’t know where these opinions are coming from, but when I see them all coming together in the same way, it’s easy to see that it’s not all personal headcanon.

As a fic writer, I’m rather dedicated to maintaining character and canon integrity myself. Currently, I’m rewriting the first part of SVLPO because after a reread it didn’t align with canon enough. I also referenced the wiki pages back then for handiness, not realizing they were inaccurate— I have some friends working right now to fix it so it’s better than before, but there’s still a lot of work to be done.

Fanon is… well, honestly I’ve never seen a fandom like this where fanon trumps canon, but specifically to the point where it is considered first tier authority. Usually, I’ve seen the idea being “this is canon but I don’t like it so I use this fanon instead.” That attitude isn’t usually for me, since I get into fandom because I actually like the source material. This is the first time, though, that I’ve seen people actually denying that fanon is fanon. It’s honestly baffling.

Anyway, to wrap this post up, here are a few things that are fanon, not canon, aside from the things mentioned already in the ask. Some of which I use in my own headcanons, some I don’t, but which are fanon nonetheless and shouldn’t be assumed unless stated in a fic itself.

Shen Jiu’s sweet tooth

Shen Jiu dying via swallowing the shards of Xuan Su

Shen Qingqiu having green eyes (this is blatantly false, his eyes are canonically black)

Luo Binghe having curly hair (not stated one way or another)

Bingqiu height difference (there’s only 4cm between them)

YQY calling SJ “Xiao-Jiu” when they’re peak lords (this does not happen, he calls him “Qingqiu”)

Chronically ill SY (it was a misleading translator’s note, this isn’t actually implied)

“Hamhua” (soft, cute, pathetic SQH, he’s actually rather conniving and only uses patheticness for his personal means— more of a rat than a hamster, also described as “handsome with an air of sleaziness” and not soft and cute)

Bulky LBH (he is a pretty-boy type, he has soft features and lean musculature. Think idol, basically)

QHT calling QJL “A-Luo” (this doesn’t happen. She calls him gege)

On that note, LBH’s surname has nothing to do with SJ’s hatred. They are different characters with different tones. LBH’s name is the same as he river — SJ would associate hearing it with the major river in the area before he associates it with a near-homophone he probably rarely if ever heard (do consider, you do not use personal names for your superiors, the only one who would’ve been calling QJL by his personal name would be his parents).

There are many, many others, but these are the ones I think of off the top of my head.

Obviously, how people make their fanworks is up to them! I also like a few of these fanon headcanons! I just wish people would stop acting like these things are actually canon.

[heymeowmao]

some translations from the 5/24 Heroes cast live-stream, not too detailed.

- doing character introductions - mzy requesting bgm with an air of ~mystery~ lyn: !! I didn't know I was in charge of it! I'm sorry!! I was unprepared. /plays a rock song/ mzy: ????? that’s not what I wanted.

- baron just chilling and eating watermelon, about to make a toast with a jar of hot sauce (which he later changed to arizona iced tea XD)

- lyn is now in charge of all sound effects for the stream

- during self introduction lyn: if I said I was in charge of visuals, you wouldn't laugh at me, right? baron: /claps/ lyn: why are you laughing though??? zsx: you started laughing yourself, first!

- made a group name for themselves, zsx: reading the group name off the script (it includes each of their names, idk) mzy: you’re looking at the script WAY too obviously lyn: I know you’re looking at the script, and I understand, I do- but... mzy: yes! make it less obvious  lyn: be more natural. you’re an actor, don’t forget. zsx: no~ I don’t have anything around me~ you’ve misunderstood me!! - lyn tries to get someone else (baron, mzy) to come up with a different name mzy: I think this one is good, because that’s what’s written in my script, too lyn: y’all are too lazy. no fun. you can’t TRY to think of another?

--

- listening test: they’re given a line from the script, and need to see if they can remember the lines that come before/after lyn: we can’t remember. it’s been more than a year since we shot this drama, how could we remember??

- in the drama there’s a part where Wen Rou meets a storyteller and asks them to include her two friends into her story; this sort of actually happened in real life, as ycy went to an amusement park and found a sugar-writer. she asked them if they could also write out the names of her two colleagues (zsx & lyn), and they asked her, “who are they?” XD but she was able to get them written, in the end. lyn: I just wanted to ask, though. are we really just only “colleagues” to you? ycy: /fist bumps/ my bros~ lyn: thank you, chaoyue. next time you can remember to include baron and mzy. 

- continuing & concluding the game host: it felt like da-ge was coasting? lyn: no! de-ge was very serious. host: he was listening closely? baron: /nods/

--

-re-enacting some scenes

scene 1: where ycy & mzy’s characters compliment each other; re-enacted with the three bros - zsx: liu-gege~  lyn: be more normal!! zsx: liu-dage! your singing sounds so nice! amazing, like the birdsong from the mountains~~ -  lyn: su mengzhen-dage, you’re the most overbearing person I’ve met in the jianghu. I want to be you, but one day, I will replace you. baron: ~don’t say that~ - baron: and I have to compliment one of the guys? lyn: you can compliment the girls, too! if you do that, then people can’t blame me for what happens in the drama next.  baron: what do you mean? lyn: they’ll understand what kind of person you are. that you care more about the girls and treat me with a little less care. -  - lyn wants to make the two girls compliment the guys, baron flips it: what type of animal would you describe us as? ycy: zsx looks like... baron: a zebra. (bc of zsx’s shirt, lol) ycy: like a doggy... your eyes are very big, so maybe a chihuahua? mzy: don’t you think his eyes are big and droopy, and kind of makes you want to hurt him? ycy: I don’t want to hurt him at all! lyn: that’s what you get for having big eyes. zsx: I want to be a wolf! ycy: you have to draw an upwards curving eyeliner to make yourself look more like a wolf. zsx: ok! I’ll draw it for you next time! ycy: you want to look like a wolf, is that it? then, I think you look like a husky! zsx: /head in hands/ host: she just refuses to say you look like a wolf.  lyn: looks like a wolf, but on the inside is a dummy. just like a husky. that’s already being plenty generous. what about me- what do you think I am? ycy: I think ning-ge looks a little more like a wolf! lyn: :D! zsx: !! D: he looks like a giraffe, come on! ycy: da-ge, I think... he looks like a panther! baron: ^o^V - lyn asks mzy what she thinks mzy: does it have to be an animal? lyn: anything’s fine- you can liken us to cars if you want. mzy: I feel like da-ge’s a chameleon! because he seems really amazing! lyn: what’s so amazing about a chameleon? mzy: if people want to hurt them, they can’t. they just seem really cool. zsx: if people want to hurt me they can, but they can’t kill him?? lyn: you’re just an 2ha, face it. mzy: ning-ge is like.... like an eagle... because I’ve watched some of his streams and he likes to stay up at night. mzy: zeng-ge is like a doggy. zsx: I can’t stream any longer! lyn: how can you be an actor with such a weak heart?  mzy: zeng-ge just seems like a very gentle animal lyn: yes, because he will give people the impression that he is very gentle and kind; interacting with him, you’ll feel the same ycy: how about a deer, then? lyn: isn’t a deer you?  ycy: ! I’m an ostrich!

scene 2: su mengzhen’s scene, from the house of falling drizzle, or w/e it’s called - they take turns re-enacting with different dialects baron: gives mzy 99 points for her performance, where he gave lyn 10 points lyn: why does she get 99 points when I got 10?! there’s something going on between you two!!

--

plays a game: what can you find in the OOO? (they just have to name things commonly seen/found in the location, following the rhythm of the game) - ycy lagged out and had to re-enter the stream, but that put her last in the lineup lyn: you’re now last in line, do you have any thoughts about that? if you’re unhappy, tell us so we can all go out then come back in (to rearrange the order of the windows). ycy: no, I don’t care about the rankings lyn: /asks the host if he could leave and rejoin the stream, so ycy isn’t last/ - moves on bc it’s too hard to keep the beat with six different people streaming in

-- 

- picked some comments out of those who commented on the episodes yesterday, so they can share and comment (seems like two comments for each character? -ish) lyn: are they disses? or are they the kind comments? host: interesting ones, there are no critical ones here. lyn: but /I’ve/ prepared some. let’s have a taste of sweetness from the host first and then I’ll provide the slaps in the face for later.

lyn: if you had to compare ycy to a fruit, she’d be a watermelon? ycy: why am I a watermelon?? oh wait- hold on. I remember he told me he hates eating watermelon. but you said /I/ was a watermelon. zsx: I don’t eat it. mzy: yes, he never eats it. ycy: you don’t eat watermelon, but you think I’m a watermelon?? D:

zsx: a lot of people who watch traditional wuxia dramas are looking for the element where the male lead goes on a journey and matures/improves along the way. but this story isn’t really like that, wang xiaoshi is more of on a journey of emotional maturity (rather than physical/in terms of skills). I hope people can see that he isn’t that naive, and that he actually has his own opinions of the world. I hope the viewers can give him a little more time and be patient- use the first 8 episodes to understand the world and you’ll be able to see where the beauty of our drama lies. host: please continue to watch the drama, this is just the beginning. lyn: the later episodes, I swear- mzy: don’t just look at the first few episodes and think everyone gets along in a nice world, the later episodes are going to be REALLY... not good.

- ycy lagged out and was last in line again, lyn exited and re-entered the stream without saying anything, so he put himself last :’)

- the next comment was abt wen rou setting off the fireworks lyn: that scene really moved me, you know? the part where she said, “you guys can hold on in there, I’ll watch the fireworks outside for you.” She lifted her head and cried with a smile on her face. I was really touched. I thought, “wow, wen rou is the best.” Also, I was singing the bgm. everyone: LOL lyn: it was me AND zsx. XD

- next comment abt the scene where lei chun’s scarf was blown away in the wind and bai choufei caught it lyn: she was standing, waiting for her boat and the wind blew her scarf away. I happened to catch it but then the wind blew it away again. how strong do you think that wind must have been?? mzy: it wasn’t blown away by the wind, wasn’t it a fishing line?  lyn: ...yes, of course. during the filming process there was a fishing line to pull the scarf away. host: it was described really beautifully but meng-jie just pulled us back into reality XD zsx: liu  yuning- there are some things you can’t hold on to no matter how much you try. you need to learn how to let things go.

- next comment abt bcf and his blades lyn: I feel like I’m opening packages. - mzy lagged out and was last, ning-ge exits and re-enters the stream again so he’s last

- comment abt su mengzhen drinking his medicine, it looked like it was hot baron: it was quite hot, yes. in the later episodes- yuning knows- my sickness got a lot more “realistic”, the thing was I really had shang huo. lyn: later on he had to take medicine before we started to shoot. he wasn’t faking his sickness, he really was sick. host: only you would have the guts to say that. lyn: of course, or else why would I be here? I didn’t come to me a celebrity, I came to reveal their secrets.

- comment: if su mengzhen had insurance the company would go bankrupt (bc he gets hurt a lot) baron: next time I won’t buy insurance, then. save you the trouble. lyn: no, you still have to. mzy: he’s sick so he had to spit a lot of blood. baron: I think I had to spit the most. It was sweet (the taste). zsx/lyn: yeah, our crew really pulled out all the stops with the fake blood. lyn: we didn’t have to eat lunch because we would be swallowing about three cups worth of fake blood each take

- comment abt lei chun falling for wen rou’s charms mzy: the actress is ycy! who can resist?? - comment abt lei chun killing a man mzy: it was after I had tricked the three of them to sleep- lyn: you didn’t trick us, you drugged us mzy: of course I tricked you- tricked you BY drugging you. Do you think I was smiling at you because I wanted to??? lyn: omg, she’s scary. - lyn’s trying to hype up mzy’s character, but mzy is like: but this was in the script, though? shouldn’t you have known about it already?; lyn: >.<;;

--

- plays a game with their surname; overlapping the surname (in this case: zeng, chen, yang, meng, liu // wang, su, wen, lei, bai) to the last character of a proverb/saying

lyn: /to baron/ if you really want to eat cake, I’ll buy you a piece!! you’ve been chewing on that fork all night!! baron: I was eating watermelon. 

- it’s difficult for zsx’s “zeng” - host comes up with “与日俱增“ - ycy laughed herself out of frame and lyn was trying hard to keep it together - bc this is this is a homophone to “宇日俱曾” < xiao yuliang and zeng shunxi’s cp name

-- 

- moves on to a drawing game: draw out the hero in your heart.

- about zsx’s - (lyn) there were five people, whose identities are not important >.> ; they get hit by lightning and then only one is left

- about ycy’s - (mzy) this must be the Sixth Half Hall and the Hall of Drizzling Rain, right?

- about lyn’s - drew the three bros? ?? baron: the one with the longest hair is you, and then according to your own logic, the other two people don’t matter so you just randomly drew them. zsx: why do I only have two hairs?? lyn: actually, I didn’t draw the two of you at all. mzy: they’re all himself!

- about mzy’s: ycy: is that a ufo? mzy: I drew “阳光洒满大地” (sun shining upon the earth) ycy: is it me? mzy: of course, babe~ ycy: /shy/ mzy: I hope that for the people that were living in that era, or the people of the past or the people who are living in the present- that all results are for the best. In my heart every person is a hero and I hope that wherever they are there will be sun shining on them.

- about baron’s: a drawing of pikachu... with the word “HERO” written out next to it... the pikachu is holding a knife. - host asks lyn what he thinks lyn: I think that in da-ge’s heart we are all his 数码宝贝 (that’s Digimon, bro..). we are all his baby. lyn: da-ge, what does it mean? you have to tell us otherwise the viewers won’t be able to sleep at night. baron: I don’t know either, it’s just the first thing that came to mind. maybe it reminds me of wang xiao shi? zsx: da-ge, I’m a wolf! host: lol, he’s still thinking about being a wolf. baron: isn’t pikachu better than a wolf? zsx: maybe he’s a little too cute? lyn: the eyes are the same (pikachu’s and zsx’s)

--

- ending comments - ycy: I hope you all can watch our drama. I know there are some parts we still need to mature but I hope you will give us your support. thank you. - lyn: thank you to everyone who is watching Heroes and thanks to Tencent. and the thing I want to say next is to my co-stars: after this drama finishes airing and with all these friends’ support, we’re sure to be popular. I just want to remind you to be a good person and not to overindulge yourself and get slack. - baron: thank you for all your support for Heroes. I think that- other than the five of us that you can see- the director and crew and the other actors that you aren’t seeing right now have really put their all into this drama, and I hope you can see that. I think this drama was made with sincerity. I think you’ll all be able to see a different side of all of us through this drama. The Director really used his own methods to take care of everyone. I hope you can stay tuned. - mzy: I hope you can all give Heroes lots of support. Throughout the filming process I could see all the effort everyone put into this drama and I working with them made me happy. I really learned a lot. Also, I hope people can patiently watch the drama- each character is really detailed and you can really see the growth of each character from beginning until the end.  - zsx: I just wanted to say- some people may be wondering why we’ve been working so hard to promote this drama; we really started pushing for this drama a long time ago. We spent every penny of the budget on its production, on its creation. The director, production, and actors all feel strongly for this drama and we’re all trying our best to get more and more people to see it. I hope that all the viewers can spend a little more time to just really look at all the details that went into this- it won’t disappoint you. I hope everyone can continue to give us your support. Thank you.

[gojo-kisser-9000]

I’m a big fan of HxH too which Gege draws inspiration from heavily. The Chimera Ant Arc is considered one of the greatest pieces of literature by fans. The kicker is…as it was coming out in a weekly format, everyone hated it. Only after it was finished and read uninterrupted did people really start loving it. I almost wonder if that’ll happen with the Sukuna fight too.

Media Literacy curse in JJK fans is really funny to me regardless. Gojo’s racism didn’t come out of nowhere. He was already kind of sus to Miguel in JJK0. This only confirmed the allegations people picked up on then. One thing I love about Gege’s writing is future information permanently changing how you view older scenes. This is one of those times. It makes me love Gojo more tbh. (I have a soft spot for racists who try to do better.)

People are too hard on Megumi for sure (even if I find the memes kind of funny). Not a lot of people realized that he spent his 16th birthday trapped inside Sukuna all by himself. Which probably made the Tsumiki death feel even worse. (I have no doubt she forced him to celebrate it.) Then he kills his adopted father and has 0 family left and is somehow supposed to tough it out. He’s just a little boy!

Yuji has always been built bigger too. His official weight is super heavy for his height. Gege explicitly stated that was done on purpose. Smh I wish people could read.

It’s funny you say that. Visiting Hawai’i radicalized me significantly. I spent a good deal of my time picking up trash and seething at the golf courses and other severe ecological damage brought on by colonization. In an ideal world [redacted]. Anyways I think you should rant about it too.

OOOOO I WILL RANT, so sorry about this in advance btw. After that I’ll get back to JJK

So I am Hawaiian-Filipino, my father is white however I was raised by my mother who held the ideals she grew up with.

Now the problem with tourism is not only does it actively mess up the environment but it also destroys the economy in Hawai’i, which I don’t need to go over I don’t think.

BUT THE WHOLE THING, IS THAT IT IS STOLEN LAND. And Native Hawaiians are STILL being kicked out of their homes, STILL struggling with everything they lost in Lahaina, STILL struggling with the water being poisoned. And yet people STILL have the audacity to take a “cute little vacation to perfect Hawai’i”.

I can NEVER go to the islands, the islands my family are from mind you, BECAUSE TOURISM FUCKED THEM UP. The amount of disrespect tourists have for the islands is insane. I can’t speak on what tourism is really like as I have never been to Hawai’i except for when I was an infant. But I do see what Native Hawaiians say, I see the damage caused by tourists when I see content by the Hawaiians.

And it’s frustrating, so very frustrating. How can people be SO disrespectful to land that they not only visit, but actively keep colonized.

I always encourage everyone to do their own research on Hawai’i and Hawaiian culture! Especially before America comes in and colonizes them. It’s hard to find accurate sources, and it’s been a while since I’ve done my own research so I don’t have any available websites on their history.

Okay I’m stopping while im ahead. Thanks for letting me get that out!

Back to JJK

You’re so right about EVERYTHING ‼️‼️

Honestly, the weekly format is only “annoying” because they wait, expect the story to drastically change, and then get more story the next week. And it HAS to be something different or it’s Bad Writing (so incredibly NOT happy with people saying that Gege’s writing is bad, there are some iffy moments but it’s overall AMAZING)

Tbh I think the internet has ruined people’s media literacy, so I encourage everyone to write something, but you can’t outright state what you’re trying to say in your story. Let your friends guess what your story conveys, it’s a great way to help boost media literacy (it’s like if ELA class was cool)

And I think we’ve covered everything about Megumi and Yuji.

Once again thank you for talking with me, especially about things I’m passionate about! It means a lot :))

[stiltonbasket]

Age reversal au~! Can we have that moment where jyl asks wwx how does he know love is or how he knew that he was in love. Or at the very least jiang fam bonding 🤭🤭🤭

"Da-ge?" Jiang Yanli asks, when her oldest brother comes back home to Lotus Pier for the first time after his wedding. "How did you know you were in love with Hanguang-jun?"

"Hanguang-jun? Who's this Hanguang-jun?" Xian-gege chides, holding baby A-Yuan up to plant a wet kiss on Yanli's cheek. "He's been your brother-in-law for a year now. You can just call him Wangji-gege."

"No, I can't!" Yanli says, horrified by the mere thought of it. "But ge, I didn't want to ask about him, really. I just wanted to know how you realized he was more than a friend to you."

Wei Wuxian squints. "Are you in love with someone, A-Li?"

Jiang Yanli coughs, flushing darker than the embroidered lotus flowers on her ruqun, and her brother jumps up from his chair so suddenly that Yuanyuan yells out a protest. "A-Die is sorry, Baobao," he soothes, stroking the baby's head until he settles down again. “But A-Li, who-?”

“Gege!” she wails. “Just tell me how you knew, first!”

“All right, all right. Hm, how I knew I liked Lan Zhan...I think it started as soon as the day I met him, but I didn’t know it was anything more than friendship until he asked if he could court me,” Xian-gege tells her. “Once there was a choice to be with him, I knew there would be no other way forward for me. That’s a good way to think about it, meimei--if the person you’re thinking about came to you tomorrow and asked you to marry him, and you knew that he loved you with all his heart, could you bear to say no?”

Yanli blushes even harder. “No, I--I don’t think I could.”

“Then you have your answer, don’t you?”

“I guess I do,” she says quietly. “But he doesn’t like me.”

Oh, Jin Zixuan likes her well enough, as well as boys like the baby sisters of their sworn brothers, but he’s never looked at her as anything more than Er-ge’s sweet meimei, no matter how earnestly she tried to make him see that she wasn’t a little girl any more. Yanli is already eighteen, and her eighteen years aren’t so few in comparison to Jin Zixuan’s twenty-three as eight would be to thirteen, so why won’t Zixuan-ge forget the little young mistress she used to be, and treat her as the grown guniang she is?

“Are you sure?” Xian-gege says gently. “You’re the dearest and wisest girl I’ve ever known, A-Li. Who wouldn’t love you?”

A tear runs down Jiang Yanli’s cheek.

“He’s engaged to someone else,” she sniffles. “I know it’s wrong to--to like someone who wouldn’t be free to love me back--but the engagement’s not his choice, and he and his intended don’t like each other, so I thought...”

Her brother closes his eyes, looking as pained as Yanli feels, and draws her into his arms.

“Is it Jin Zixuan?”

Jiang Yanli bursts into sobs.

“It is,” she chokes. “I’ve liked him all my life, and I tried to stop after I knew he was supposed to marry Su-jie, but I couldn’t--”

“Did that peacock lead you on?” Wei Wuxian demands. “If he did, I’ll drag him here from Lanling this very minute to kneel and beg forgiveness in front of Jiang-shushu, betrothal or no betrothal!”

“No! No, it wasn’t like that.”

Xian-gege draws back. “All right, then,” he says decisively. “A-Li, don’t cry. Your gege will fix this for you.”

Yanli blinks at him, perplexed. “I don’t see how.”

“I’m going to tell Wen Ning to hurry up and make his move,” her brother mutters. “He’s been delaying his coronation because he’s afraid being Wen-zongzhu will distance him from Qing-meimei and his little cousins, but he really can’t afford to put this off any longer.”

“Put what off?”

“Go bathe your face and have lunch with Auntie,” he urges. “Gege has letters to write.”

So Jiang Yanli goes, more bewildered than ever. She takes A-Yuan with her to visit Mother in the south pavilion, and Xian-gege runs off to write to Wen Qionglin, though Jiang Yanli can’t imagine what he could do to resolve a foolish matter of the heart like this one.

But two months later, after Wen Ruohan steps down and yields the zongzhu’s seat to his nephew, she finally gets her answer: because Wen Qionglin shocks the whole cultivation world by kidnapping Qin Su from her manor in Laoling, and forcefully taking her to wife before Qin Cangye could even send word of her disappearance to Jin Guangshan.

"I don’t care,” Wen Qionglin shrugged, when emissaries from Laoling and Lanling came to plead for Qin Su’s release, reminding Wen-zongzhu of her lifelong engagement to Jin Zixuan and the dowry Qin Cangye was supposed to sign over to Jin Guangshan in return for his daughter’s bride price. “I’ve already married her. Maiden Qin and I are one from now unto the world’s ending, and I will not even think of parting from her until Jin Zixuan himself comes to challenge me for her hand.”

But Jin Zixuan did not go, unwilling to take his sect to war for a woman already wed; and Qin Su remained in Qishan as Wen Ning’s lawful bride, giving birth to a daughter by him within ten months of the wedding. She had turned out to be a very competent Wen-furen, using the education she was given as the future mistress of the Jinlintai to govern the Qishan Wen sect, and she hid her despair over her kidnapping so well that no one could pity her for it.

“You knew,” Yanli accuses her brother, after the jianghu finally recovers from the backlash. “Gege, you planned this!”

Wei Wuxian laughs and pats her head.

“It was a love match, A-Li,” he grins. “How do you think A-Ning managed to steal her so easily, ah? Qin-guniang went with him willingly.”

The next time Yanli sees Qin Su is at baby Wen Xuan’s full-moon celebration, and indeed, there is no shadow of pain about her. The new Wen-furen is radiant, glorying in every look and gentle touch from her husband, and baby Xuanxuan is perfect: the very picture of her mother, and so healthy and strong that Wen-zongzhu named her the heir to his clan the very day she was born.

“A-Li?” someone calls, while Jiang Yanli is busy leaning over the baby’s crib and letting Xuan-bao squeeze all the blood out of her poor, unsuspecting fingers. “A-Li, you’ve been there a while. Can I fetch you something to eat?”

She turns, scarcely recognizing the voice--for while she knew it, it had never been directed at anyone so reverently as this before, and certainly never at her.

“Zixuan-ge,” she gasps, trying to pry her hand out of Wen Xuan’s iron grip. “What are you doing here?”

He quirks a brow at her. “I was invited, remember?”

“No, I know that. But what are you doing here? All the men are with Wen-zongzhu in the feasting hall, aren’t they?”

“En, they are,” Jin Zixuan replies, rubbing his neck awkwardly. “But I thought that you must be hungry, and I knew you wouldn’t want to eat in there, so I was wondering if...”

Jiang Yanli’s heart flutters.

“You thought right,” she says, meeting Jin Zixuan’s eyes with her own. “Go fetch us some dinner from the feasting hall, Zixuan-ge. I’d like it very much.”

[drwcn]

follow up to [post] exploring the crack au if lwj was a girl 

〒▽〒 ps im not trying to erase canon lwj representation, not at all, wangxian is mm in all my other fics, this is just stupid fun

in a ceteris paribus situation aka all other things staying equal: 

1) Lan Wangji 100% still has a resting bitch face, which probably would get her a couple of “Lan-er-guniang 美若天仙 (beautiful as an immortal/goddess) but would benefit from smiling more” comments but nobody is that desperate to die yet so, she’s spared. But damn... imagine the sheer number of thirsty boys who’d try to secure a marriage with LWJ. None of them is good enough for Wangji as far as Lan Xichen is concerned. Okay - maybe in Lan Xichen’s opinion, Nie Mingjue is good enough, but he couldn’t be less interested. I see her as I see Huaisang, Xichen please. 

2) Everything interaction between Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian in Wei Wuxian’s first life is now 500% more scandalous. 

Exhibit A) Their first meeting at the gates; Jiang Cheng immediately felt his spidey senses tingling.  —“You’d sooner have immortals flying out of your ass than get with someone like her. The second jade of Gusu? The pearl in old man Lan’s eyes? C’mon.”  —“Shut up, A-Cheng.” —“Uh-huh.”  —“Also, she’s not that pretty. Her brother Zewu-jun is much better. There’s a reason he’s ranked first.” WWX is still a disaster bi.  — “LMAO, you? Zewu-jun? Please.” 

Exhibit B) Just because LWJ is a girl does not mean WWX grew more brain cells. 

WWX, straight up to Lan Qiren’s face, “Lan-meimei and I - we’re zhiji.” (he means it like we’re kindred spirits, peas of a pod, etc)  LWJ: *does not deny* Lan Xichen: ⚆_⚆ Lan Qiren: ಠ╭╮ಠ

Exhibit C) Lan Wangji getting drunk the first time. Wei Wuxian knew he crossed a line the minute he invited Lan-er-guniang for a drink. Really, WWX, even for you, this is inappropriate. When Lan Wangji fell face first onto the table, Wei Wuxian knew, he fucked up. “Hey....hey...Lan....Lan...-er-guniang,” He poked her. “Don’t...don’t sleep here! You can’t sleep here! If your Uncle finds out or if Jiang-shushu finds out...they’ll skin me alive and then...and then they’ll make me marry you! I don’t want to marry you; you don’t talk and I’m too young!” 

WWX, being a dipshit, “Hey Lan Zhan, call me Wei-gege.”  LWJ, drunk as fuck, “Wei..gege.”  WWX *((( heart )))* ??? 

Exhibit D) The Cold Pond. Okay, so I don’t think Zewu-jun would sabotage his sister’s virtue by sending a stupid teenage boy her way while she’s bathing, but doesn’t mean Su She is above all that. Wei “I didn’t see anything I swear!” Wuxian. Lan “I will gouge out your eyes.” Wangji. Somehow they still end up in the cave. Maybe WWX got in the water after LWJ got out and got sucked into the vortex and LWJ heard the commotion, turned around, saw WWX had disappeared. “Wei Ying?!” A panicked LWJ jumps back into the pond, “Stop fooling around, come out!” 

Jiang Cheng and Wen Qing 👀👀 when LWJ and WWX fall out of the cave together. Also the fact that Lan-er-guniang and Wei-gongzi went missing, together, for two days. Who knows what could’ve happened. I mean anything really. I mean... that’s gotta stir the pot a little were it not for the Yin Iron stealing everyone’s attention away from this bit of juicy scandal. 

Oh the whole story... so much to work with, so little time. 

3) Because Lan Wangji is a girl, now suddenly there’s a high ranking member of the Lan Clan who can host the girls at Cloud Recesses. I mean, Mianmian, Jiang Yanli, Wen Qing, Lan Wangji - SISTERLY FRIENDSHIP. Other than Mianmian, none of the girls are really talkers which suits Lan Wangji perfectly. Even Mianmian’s chatter is endearing.

4) Lan Wangji is absolutely still a powerhouse during the Sunshot Campaign. The inherent aesthetics of fem!lwj telling the Wen goons to “kneel” - no one will deprive me of this.  Also she will still cut off your arm if you cross her - Xue Yang and Jin Guangyao ya better watch out still. 

I am TORN between two options: Lan Wangji tol and kickass or Lan Wangji smol and kickass. On one hand, the aesthetics of willowy elf-like LWJ, on the other hand, 5′2′’ of whoop ass who can and will throw an unconscious wwx over her shoulder firewoman-style and toll him to safety.  

And amongst other things: 

A) Lan Wangji still becomes Chief Cultivator, because excuse me who else is left to clean up this mess? Jiang “Short-fuse” Wanyin? Nie “I won’t do what I’m not intended to do” Huaisang? Jin “13 year-old” Ling? Or Sect Leader Yao?  Technically, being a woman means that she was never Lan Xichen’s heir, but at the end of it, it’s not like Gusu Lan is left with a lot of choices.  Just the poetic justice of Gusu Lan pleading for Lan Wangji to come back when she fully intends to 隐居山野 (retreat into the mountains) with the resurrected WWX.

Lan Wangji being Chief Cultivator would echo Lan Yi’s tenure and rectify the fact that Gusu Lan’s only female head of family “failed”. Lan Yi had to face a mountain of prejudice because she was woman; someone has to say “up yours” to that. A woman as not only the sect master of Gusu Lan but the Chief Cultivator? Love that for Gusu Lans. (⌐■_■) ☞ ☞

B) Because of ~ sexism ~ I wonder if Lan Wangji would get titled “Hanguang” at all even after the Sunshot Campaign. Even Lan Yi, the SL Lan of her time didn’t have a title. Chances are LWJ won’t either. (Note: Violet Spider is not a title, it’s a moniker). So — say after the way Lan Wangji is still just “Lan-er-guniang”, and she does not obtain the title “Han Guang” until after she leaves Cloud Recesses and become rogue. (srsly how did they come up with these titles in canon, did gusu lan just look at 21 year old lwj and be like yah he’s lord light bearer *cue trevor noah stand up joke* why do you call yourself “great” britain? isn’t that a bit presumptuous? shouldn’t you go around doing good things and then let other people come to the conclusion: oh britain look how great you are? same logic with lwj.) 

Lan Wangji, a Jade of Gusu or a nameless rogue, still goes where trouble is, helping those who need it. After laying low for a year or two to heal, Lan Wangji began night hunting. Donned neck to ankle in white silk and tulle, and a weimao (wide brimmed veil hat) obscuring her face, she became known to the people as Hanguang Sanren, the lightbearing wanderer. Gusu’s highest power probably has some idea who she is - or at least they can guess - but the vast majority of people don’t. 

C) Lan Sizhui raised by rogue Lan Wangji as his mum would be different. Still cultured, respectful, but definitely with an air of keeping others at arm’s length. 

For instance, grown-up Sizhui running interference and saving a cohort of gentry disciples on joint hunts.

Jingyi: 这人谁呀？Who is this guy? Zizhen: 多谢兄台搭救之恩，小可看您眼生，敢问兄台尊姓大名，何门何派，改日当登门拜访. Many thanks for saving us. I don’t believe we’ve met, pray tell what is your name and sect, so we may visit at a later time to thank you for tonight. Sizhui: 在下无门无姓 ，单名思追 。举手之劳不足挂齿 ，怎敢劳烦各位名门子弟答谢。My name is Sizhui, belonging to no family and to no sect. As for tonight - I only did what anyone would; it bears no mentioning and requires no thanks. Jin Ling: 你这人，看你工力不凡，想和你交个朋友，可你怎么遮遮掩掩的。Hey you, we see you’re a talented cultivator and want to make your acquaintance. Why are you so dodge-y? Zizhen：金陵 — Jing Ling - Sizhui: 若是有缘，还会相见。告辞。If it’s fated, we will meet again. Farewell.  

Later:  Jingyi: 思。追。 思追谁？Si. Zhui. To recollect and long for whom?  Sizhui: 母亲的一位故人. Someone from Mother’s past.  Jingyi: 你父亲？...Your father?  Sizhui: 我不知。I don’t know. 

I thought about how cute it would be if sizhui and jin ling knew each other but guys...Jiang Cheng literally thinks he killed Sizhui’s biological father. Like he literally thinks he orphaned Sizhui before Sizhui is even born. And Lan Wangji would never accept anything from Jiang Wanyin, not that it would stop Jiang Wanyin from trying. 

A package of books here, a new robe for Sizhui there. Lan Wangji doesn’t know how Jiang Cheng keeps finding her. She and Sizhui are nomadic.  

D) The inevitable conversation after wwx is revived. 

You know what would be funnier than Jiang Cheng thinking Sizhui is a wangxian baby is if Lan Qiren thinks Sizhui is a wangxian baby. 

[guqin-and-flute]

Episode 73: Koala Chlamydia Is A Problem [My Brothers, My Sister and Me Excerpt]

[MBMSAM AU] [First Installment] [Podfics!] [Ao3 Link]

[COVER ART BY THE FANTASTIC LITTLESMARTART]

Jin Zixuan: Do we want another question?

Qin Su: Sure, yeah, got one right here. 'When I was younger, I was really skinny and weak'--hey! Hey, now, negative body talk, much! That's super judgmental of yourself!

Mo Xuanyu: And of us people who are skinny and weak right now! [teasing] Right, Yao-gege?

Meng Yao: [calmly] I'm not affiliated with you.

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [cackles]

Qin Su: 'When I was a kid, I was really skinny and weak, so I made it my mission to get as jacked as possible so people would take me seriously. I put in a lot of hard work, changed my exercise routine and diet and it worked. But now, as an adult I'm a 6 foot 7 dude--'

Jin Zixuan: [incredulous] 6 foot 7 ?

Qin Su: Just a mountain of a man. '--6 foot 7 dude with serious muscle mass--'

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: [sotto voce] Good God .

Qin Su: '-- and a pretty intense resting face. I routinely make children cry just by existing and everyone shoots me nervous looks in the grocery store. It gets to me sometimes. I’m not a bad guy! I just look scary. What are some ways that I can make myself less intimidating?’

Mo Xuanyu: Huh.

Qin Su: I mean, let’s see...puppies are unintimidating. Can you devise a system where you carry a few around with you at all times? Maybe in some saddle bags, everywhere you go?

Mo Xuanyu: The movies, the gym, on dates… .

Jin Zixuan: Sure, until they start pissing down your legs. Then you’re not just unintimidating, you’re the guy no one wants to stand next to at the bus stop.

Meng Yao: I mean, it still does the job, doesn’t it?

Mo Xuanyu: You could get a butterfly tattoo, like, directly on your forehead.

Meng Yao: Okay, please explain to me your thought process on how exactly that would make anyone more approachable.

Qin Su: They still want to be able to navigate human society, A-Yu.

Mo Xuanyu: Ew, why? 

Jin Zixuan: Let’s see...what makes someone approachable….Who is the least intimidating of all of us?

Qin Su: [immediately] You.

Meng Yao: [affirming] Mm.

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: [incredulous] What?

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: Oh yeah, you’re like...you’re like a poodle. Or a--

Jin Zixuan: [highly offended] Excuse me! I'm the oldest and definitely the tallest one here!

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [ill concealed snort]

[crosstalk] Qin Su: [pityingly] Oh, da- ge .

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: Or a golden retriever.

Qin Su: Please don't tell me you think that being tall translates into you actually being scary. You’re tallest by, like, 3 inches. At most, that’s just part of the equation of being scary.

Meng Yao: And the rest of Zixuan’s equation is just filled with collared polo shirts. Which absolutely tanks the intimidation ratio.

Mo Xuanyu: That doesn't tank yours, though.

Meng Yao: I wear button downs. It’s not the same. [Vaguely disgusted undertone] Collared polos.

Jin Zixuan: Excuse you, polos are weekend wear and there is nothing wrong-- I can be intimidating!

Qin Su: [doubtfully] Ehhhhh…

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [badly stifled snickers]

[crosstalk]Jin Zixuan: I can! Just because I’ve never had to intimidate you --

Qin Su: Let's just say; citation needed

Mo Xuanyu: Please, jiejie has you beat.

Jin Zixuan: [indignant] Wha--

[crosstalk] Qin Su: He's right, gege; an unopened jar of mayonnaise has you beat. And I'm no unopened jar of mayonnaise. 

Mo Xuanyu: That shit is opened .

Meng Yao: That’s a Tinder profile quote.

Qin Su: What? 'Spicier than mayo?'

Mo Xuanyu: [half singing, half chanting] ‘My mayo brings all the boys to the yard, and they’re like-- [normal voice] this is really underwhelming.’

Meng Yao: [musing] ‘Saltier than soy sauce, spicier than mayo….’

Qin Su: Why do we always come back to food? Are our Skype calls haunted by starving Victorian ghost children? Are we possessed?

Mo Xuanyu: [mournful, high pitched, bad British accent] ‘My name is Bartholemew and I’m starving. Please, spare some mayo.’

Meng Yao: It’s your own fault if none of you bother to eat before we record. You all had the schedule.

Mo Xuanyu: [crunches loudly near mic]

Meng Yao: [falsely happy] Hey, thanks! Thank you so much, A-Yu, love the level spike on that one. Editing mouth noises out of our podcast makes my day brighter.

Jin Zixuan: [under his breath] Just...unbelievable….You all….

Qin Su: [smiling] I think we broke him.

Meng Yao: [laughing] Zixuan is limping behind the conversation indignantly, brandishing his cane….

Mo Xuanyu: [sympathetically] Awww.

Jin Zixuan: I--! I am a high powered businessman! I am trained in martial arts and archery and swordsmanship --

Mo Xuanyu: [mouth full] Oh please, gege, you’re a pod caster.

Jin Zixuan: [forcefully] I am a CEO--

[crosstalk] Qin Su: [ignoring him] I think Yao-gege is somehow the most and least intimidating out of all of us at the same time, if we're all being completely honest with ourselves and our place in the world.

Mo Xuanyu: Aww, I thought I was at least a contender!

Qin Su: Honey, you're feral. There's a difference.

Mo Xuanyu: What does a kid have to do around here to be intimidating?

Meng Yao: Learn how to chew with your mouth closed, for one.

Jin Zixuan: [indignantly] A-Yao? Are you not going to deny this?

[Brief silence]

Meng Yao: [calmly] I don't think I'm scary.

Qin Su & Mo Xuanyu: [instant uproarious laughter]

Jin Zixuan: Oh, come on! He's like...a little koala bear or something! How is that scary!

Meng Yao: [offended] Excuse me--

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [still laughing] I’m gonna pee --

Meng Yao: -- koalas have smooth brains and eat poisonous leaves all day. Are you calling me a poisonous idiot bear?

Qin Su: [wheezes] Only in private.

Mo Xuanyu: [laughter trailing off] Wait, wait, hold on. Don’t all koalas have chlamydia or something?

Qin Su: [renewed laughter]

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [startled laugh] What?

Mo Xuanyu: Chlamydia! I think that I read--!

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: Oh my god, I think I’ve actually heard that. The plague, the bubonic plague, isn’t it? Or that--Some sort of--that disease people used to get where bits of you fall off?

Qin Su: Beheadings?

Meng Yao: [voice strangled from laughter] Yes, A-Su, that ancient disease the French Revolution that all koalas have--

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: [snickering]

Mo Xuanyu: [loud and close to mic] LEPROSY .

[crosstalk] Qin Su: Ow--

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: Holy shit--

Mo Xuanyu: It’s leprosy and you’re thinking of armadillos, da-ge. 

Jin Zixuan: [muttering] Aren’t we all….

Qin Su: [solemnly]  Armadillos and guillotines. Every damn minute of every damn day.

Mo Xuanyu: And I googled it, I’m right; koala chlamydia is a problem.

Meng Yao: And we’ve just found the title of this episode.

Qin Su: If most koalas have chlamydia, I feel like they have other problems they have to deal with.

Mo Xuanyu: Those pesky, promiscuous koalas!

Qin Su: Get them some damn sex ed! Use those eucalyptus leaves for protection!

Meng Yao: [pleasantly] That’s just about the worst thing I’ve heard all day.

Mo Xuanyu: Eugh, that menthol, though. Like Vicks for your dicks!

Meng Yao: I hate it.

[crosstalk]Jin Zixuan: [pained] PSA: don’t do that. Ever.

Qin Su: The voice of experience?

Jin Zixuan: I don’t think you actually want an answer to that, meimei.

Meng Yao: You people make me hate learning and also knowing things.

Mo Xuanyu: Also I've been looking it up and mountain lions are the ones that can have the bubonic plague.

Meng Yao: Choose your fighter; chlamydia ridden koala, leprosy ridden armadillo, or mountain lion with the Black Death.

Qin Su: Well, at least the mountain lion could inflict some damage. Use it like a poison delivery system, like an anthrax letter to secretly infect people.

Meng Yao: [patient teacher tone] ‘A mountain lion is to an anthrax letter, like a koala is to a…?’

Qin Su: [mock frustration] Oh, man, I know this one….

Mo Xuanyu: 'I can't come into school today, I got attacked by a mountain lion.'

Qin Su: [acting concerned] 'Oh my God, are you okay? Are you gonna have scars?'

Mo Xuanyu: 'Worse. The Plague .'

Jin Zixuan:  Okay, glad we got our animal infections all sorted out--back to what we were talking about. So, riddle me this--

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [delighted, Riddlemancer voice] Rrrriddle Me Piss, kids--!

[crosstalk] Meng Yao & Qin Su: NO!

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: Oh my god --

Mo Xuanyu: [laughing] I don't actually have anything today--

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: A blessing .

Mo Xuanyu: --but I'll get you next time.

Jin Zixuan: No, I need to know, genuinely, this is not a bit-- why do you think A-Yao scarier than me?

Qin Su: I mean, what's not scary about a smooth brained bear full of toxins and chlamydia?

Meng Yao: [disgruntled] Uh huh.

Mo Xuanyu: Technically, they’re not bears, they're marsupials! And I think Yao-gege is more of an armadillo--hard on the outside--

[slight crosstalk] Qin Su: --And full of leprosy on the inside. 

Meng Yao: [further from mic, keyboard tapping] 'And to Mo Xuanyu...and Qin Su...I leave... absolutely nothing, except...this bag of dog shit and...spiders…..'

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [laughing]

[crosstalk] Qin Su: Awww, A-Yu, we're being written out of his will again!

Jin Zixuan: Listeners, am I wrong? Am I crazy? He’s the size of a toddler--

[slight crosstalk] Meng Yao: [still away from mic, keyboard tapping] ‘And to Jin Zixuan...I leave--’

Jin Zixuan: He looks like a sugar glider baby that got turned into a human man--

[slight crosstalk] Meng Yao: ‘This box...of useless...tetanus filled screws….’

Qin Su: Da-ge--

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: ‘--that i...encourage him to use…--’

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [snickering]

Meng Yao: ‘As acupuncture needles.’ There. Sent to the notary. Now, what were we talking about, again?

Qin Su: Da-ge, all those things might be true--

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [flatly] Wow.

Qin Su: But here’s a test. What would you do to someone picking on A-Yu in school?

Jin Zixuan: [immediate, sounding businesslike and slightly aggressive] I would contact their parents and set up a meeting with the school officials and make it very clear that they are never to do that again.

Qin Su: [grinning] Okay. Yao-gege, what would you do to someone picking on A-Yu in school?

Meng Yao: [calmly] Absolutely nothing you could prove in a court of law.

Mo Xuanyu: [bursts out laughing]

[crosstalk] Qin Su: I mean--

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: Uhhhh--

Qin Su: You see? Also-- [quick sing-song voice] 🎵 This is a joke, for legal reasons, this is a joke 🎵 [normal voice] He’s got that--that--

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [lingering laughter] Yeah, it's that menace. Da-ge, you’re like--you’re like if a duckling--okay, you remember when I brought you to Hot Topic? You were like a duckling at a Death Metal concert.

Jin Zixuan: [defensively] The music was so loud--

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [pityingly] Oh, Zixuan.

Qin Su: You're like if a golf course got turned into a human. 

Meng Yao You're what would happen if you gave mac and cheese a social security card and keys to a lamborghini.

Jin Zixuan: [unamused] Okay.

Mo Xuanyu: [laughing] You're the lightly salted almonds of people. 

Qin Su: You're like a wholesome Hallmark movie fucked the concept of the suburbs.

Jin Zixuan: [unamused] Sure. Sure.

Meng Yao: You emanate the peril of a box of lethargic kittens.

Jin Zixuan: Wow. My own family. This is coming from the physical manifestation of a My Chemical Romance song--

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: [smug] You say that like it’s a bad thing.

Jin Zixuan: -- and the woman who cries at the Land Before Time every time she watches it. I think this is a case of glass houses, here. Let ye who are intimidating... 

Qin Su: Oh, so we’re not roasting Yao-gege back?

Meng Yao: Not sure how me being compared to a STD riddled marsupial for about 5 minutes straight escaped your notice, A-Su, but alright. 

Jin Zixuan: I feel that you are all being...heinously short sighted, here. Are you seriously trying to tell me that A-Yu is scarier than me, a full grown man?

Meng Yao: I would certainly be more warranted in my concern about him stabbing me than I would about you.

Mo Xuanyu: Oh my God, gege, that was like 5 years ago and I already said I was sorry--

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: [loudly] What--

[crosstalk] Qin Su: Did we actually help this person? I mean--

Mo Xuanyu: We always help, jiejie.

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: Hold on--

Qin Su: We learned a lot about exactly how disturbing the animal kingdom is, but….

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: No, go back--

[slight crosstalk] Meng Yao: Dress like a middle aged accountant, share minion memes on Facebook, and buy your son a puppy so you have an excuse to talk to the dog and not people. There you go. Done.

Jin Zixuan: No, rewind--Xuanyu, you stabbed our brother? 

[brief silence]

Qin Su: [brightly] Well, that's going to do it for us today, folks--!

Jin Zixuan: A-Yu!

[crosstalk] Mo Xuanyu: It was only a little!

Jin Zixuan: How can you stab someone a little ?! 

[crosstalk] Qin Su: Thank you so much for listening in this week--

Jin Zixuan: With what ? Why?!

Mo Xuanyu: It honestly wasn’t that bad, he made it sound like--

[crosstalk] Jin Zixuan: That's not an answer --

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [begins laughing]

Jin Zixuan: A-Yao--!

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [still laughing]

Qin Su: [brightly]  We hope you enjoyed our enlightening romp, here! We want to thank Sister Sledge for the use of the song We Are Family. A-Yu, how about that last Yahoo?

[crosstalk] Meng Yao: [farther from mic, clearly grinning] Ohhh, boy. 

Mo Xuanyu: Okay, okay--anonymous Yahoo Answers user asks….[exaggerated, desperate voice] ‘I can’t afford a freezer. Where do I put my deer meat?’

[Outro music begins quietly]

Qin Su: [laughs] I’m Qin Su.

Jin Zixuan: [sighs, disgruntled] I’m Jin Zixuan.

Meng Yao: [grinning] I’m Meng Yao.

Mo Xuanyu: [sheepish] I’m Mo Xuanyu.

Qin Su: And this has been My Brothers, My Sister, And Me! Thank you to everyone, see you next week and remember; send your trash dad straight to jail!

[littlesmartart]

Leverage AU thoughts

okay so I wanted to keep the worldbuilding for the AU in that specific photoset relatively short for the sake of how the post worked, but I've seen a lot of questions in the tags so here is some more information for you all, under the cut because it got LONG:

MORALITY: okay so I called this the "(sort of) Leverage AU" because it basically flips the Leverage concept of "criminals work together with one non-criminal for the greater good" into "one criminal persuades a bunch of non-criminals that law =/= morality and that sometimes to make sure the bad guys get justice you have to work around legality". Obviously some people are easier to persuade than others (Huaisang has always been pretty ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ about the law, but before he joins the team he insists all of his crimes have been Theoretical, and besides, pirating movies isn't real crime, da-ge, god), and some of them are a little troubled by it but have their own reasons for joining (Mingjue has a LOT of issues with it, but joins to protect Huaisang for That One Job, and then stays with the insistence that a. they don't kill anyone, b. they don't involve anyone who doesn't super deserve it, and c. that their goal is always to get evidence so the mark can be convicted and the mark is always handed over to the appropriate authorities at the end of the job. he has a little more moral flexibility than canon Mingjue because of his Complicated Past He Wants To Atone For, but he still has an incredibly strong internal moral code that he absolutely will not violate. Jiang Cheng cares more about the law in principle, rather than personally, and as soon as he sees that they can get Justice that the law can't, he's sold). Xichen has the hardest time of it; he jumps into the first job without protest because Meng Yao asks (and Meng Yao never ever asks for anything, so it... it must be important, right? And Jin Guangshan definitely deserves it). After that he has a lot of internal struggling going on, and he's usually the one in the team trying to steer them towards legal means, and going through the "correct" channels. He probably has a breakdown about it at the end of a season and spends the next season Travelling To Find Himself. He winds up coming back to the team when, on one of his travels, he watches a family he's staying with lose everything after being targeted by a conman, but because of a dirty police chief the evidence is destroyed. They refuse to take his money when he tries to help, and he realises that they only way to get them justice... is to call in the team. That's not to say he is 100% cool with everything from then on, and he definitely draws the line at certain criminal acts (stealing for the fun of it he is not okay with, for example, and he gives a Hard No on the suggestion of trying White Rabbit) but for the most part he accepts the concept of what they do as being for the greater good.

GRIFTER XICHEN: yeah it's ridiculous and implausible but hear me out... that just makes it better. Because this man is terrible at improv and can only lie when he's in character (you see that means it's not lying then, it's just ACTING) and doesn't drink and absolutely will not seduce a mark past the level of general flirting... and yet he's somehow a wildly successful grifter??? How??? I'll tell you how: he's so fucking handsome and kind and charming and cultured that pretty much everyone who meets him just... melts a little bit and, with some coaxing, gives him whatever he needs. IT'S LIKE A FREAKIN SUPERPOWER and it's absolutely ridiculous. With the added bonus that he's juuust famous enough that the average person might kind of think he looks familiar, which means he's very good at coming across like he totally belongs wherever he's seen. Of course he works here, he's been here for months... don't you recognise him?

NO WOMEN ON THE TEAM: look, in Meng Yao's defence, when he put together this team he thought it would only be for one job, he wasn't trying to future-proof it! But yes, it can sometimes be an issue if they don't have time to plan ahead, and he and Huaisang - as the most stereotypically feminine members of the team, and by far the best liars - will usually take on any female roles they need if they're in a pinch and can't call in outside help, although all of them are ready to take on roles of different genders if need be (female roles are actually the only way to persuade Huaisang to grift, and he has an extensive shoe collection for such roles that he likes to expand by billing to the company account... Meng Yao is deeply unimpressed by this).

OTHER CHARACTERS: when Meng Yao started this, he worked very very hard to keep his siblings and the rest of his family out of it, to keep them all away from any fallout in case it went wrong (and also to stop any pesky Moral Issues from getting in the way). When that was over and they started taking regular cases, he relaxed the rule a little - Mianmian will sometimes step in to help if she can be sold on how bad the person is they're taking down, Zonghui can be relied upon if they need extra muscle, and Wen Qing is their go-to Ask No Questions doctor. Wei Wuxian frequently gets roped in to consult, as, if you give him six packs of hot chips, ten cans of monster, twelve hours, and a laptop, he can become a specialist in almost anything. Jiang Cheng was very very resistant towards the idea of his brother being allowed in the team, even just as a consultant, but the MOMENT Wei Wuxian was given any access to Shenanigans there was no fucking stopping him. In the later jobs Qin Su accidentally gets pulled into one of the cons and turns out to be a WAY better grifter than anyone could have imagined, so she winds up on the "ally call list". Meng Yao is both perturbed and proud, but absolutely draws the line at teenage Mo Xuanyu being allowed to help.

PAIRINGS: flipping the "two parents + three kids" dynamic in Leverage, this AU has 3zun and Sangcheng - so "three gege + two didi". Xiyao have a One That Got Away sort of past, and Xichen joins the team SPECIFICALLY because Meng Yao expresses emotional vulnerability by asking for help fOr OnCe In HiS fUcKiNg LiFe. Nielan dated when they were teens, and are happy to be reunited, but Mingjue refuses to rekindle a romantic relationship until Xiyao sort their shit out because it's obvious to anyone with eyes how hung up on Meng Yao Xichen is. Nieyao have a certain amount of "I'll work with you towards a common cause but that doesn't mean I have to like you" vibe, but veeery slooowlyyy wind up bonding over doing stuff they're not proud of for something they were so sure was a worthy cause at the time, but now they just feel jaded and used (there's a lot of arguments along the lines of "oh, so my corporate espionage is worse than what you did in spec ops... because the military says that what you did was legal. RIGHT. OKAY. SURE."). After several years of will-they-won't-they struggle, 3zun do get together, and everyone is very relieved. As for Sangcheng... it starts off as Huaisang just flirting kind of obnoxiously with Jiang Cheng, who rolls his eyes and snarks back, and then naturally Huaisang winds up catching feelings and is like [meme voice] Haha, I'm In Danger! He is unwilling to act on his feelings because he doesn't believe that Jiang Cheng likes him that way, and continues to believe that right up until the day Jiang Cheng snaps, and grabs him and kisses him, and is like "if I didn't actually like you flirting with me I would have punched you in the face years ago" and Huaisang is like "huh. Yeah that's probably true."

[ibijau]

Futures Past pt 20 / on AO3

(posting early this week because I might not have time tomorrow)(also, because of the upcoming xisang week, I’m not sure yet if I’ll update this fic next week)

With some help from Su She, Nie Huaisang gets his wangxian ship sailing.

Nie Huaisang guiltily twisted his hands as they left the classroom, already half crying as Wei Wuxian finished retelling his first day of punishment with Lan Wangji. 

"I really am so sorry, Wei-xiong!" he lamented. "I really wish I could help you. Maybe if I could find a way to copy part of the rules for you and pass them to you…" 

"Lan er-gongzi would surely notice," Meng Yao softly objected. "And then you'd both be punished again." 

"Aren't you busy enough with your own punishment anyway?" Jiang Cheng huffed. "You'll be lucky if you can even attend your music lessons with all that extra homework you were given, right?" 

With a miserable sigh, Nie Huaisang nodded. Cheating was more work than he'd thought, and he'd have to find a better way to do it if he were to pass that year. Though really, it had been Lan Wangji’s fault for joining the lectures, which he hadn't done the previous year, and also Wei Wuxian's for taunting Lan Wangji by looking at him. Of course Lan Wangji had gotten curious, and he'd noticed the cheating, and… 

For some reason, Lan Qiren had decided that Wei Wuxian was the instigator in this business, so he'd been punished the hardest. But Nie Huaisang had been given a lot of essays to write, and he didn't dare to ask Lan Xichen to help, fearing to be scolded for his dishonesty. Meng Yao and Jiang Cheng, who hadn't cheated at all, offered little sympathy and even less help, the first because he was still catching up, the second because he didn't feel like it. Hopefully Su She might give a hand, if Nie Huaisang cried a little. 

"It's really not so bad," Wei Wuxian said carelessly. "I won't say that first afternoon in the library with Lan Zhan was fun, he's even more boring than his uncle, but I think I can entertain myself. I bet before the month is over, I can get him to break his self control. Now that'd be fun!" 

Nie Huaisang stopped on his tracks and grabbed him by the arm, not a trace of tears in his eyes. 

"Wei-xiong, why do you have to antagonise him so much?" 

"Why wouldn't I? I'd like to be his friend, but he's too stuck up. Pissing him off is the next best thing." 

Baffled by that logic, Nie Huaisang looked at their two friends. Jiang Cheng rolled his eyes, while Meng Yao was trying his best not to smile. 

"Wei gongzi is like that, don't question it too much. He likes to tease people, and thinks everyone understands it's meant in a friendly manner."

Judging by the tone of his voice, Meng Yao himself had been a victim of that friendly teasing, and that perhap it hadn't gone so smoothly between them. That would explain why Meng Yao seemed to prefer Jiang Cheng's company, who was less fun to have around, but also a little quieter when he wasn’t shouting at Wei Wuxian.

Personally, Nie Huaisang preferred Wei Wuxian out of the three, but was getting a little annoyed at him right at that moment. 

While Jiang Cheng and Meng Yao went their way to enjoy their freedom for the rest of the day (they would waste it studying, they seemed the type), Nie Huaisang decided to accompany Wei Wuxian all the way to the library, so they could chat a little. He still had a plan to put in motion, orders from his future self to obey, and his own natural desire for fun to satisfy.

“I don’t understand why you’re like that with Lan Wangji,” Nie Huaisang said as they took the longest path possible toward the library, trying to keep his tone casual. "If you want to be his friend, there are better ways. Why don't you talk to him nicely?" 

Wei Wuxian did not even hesitate. "I've tried, and he ignores me." 

That was sadly true, as Nie Huaisang had seen a few times. It didn’t help that Wei Wuxian naturally sounded like he was trying to tease people, even when he was sincere. He was so fun to have around that most people didn’t mind it, but for someone like Lan Wangji...

"Well maybe if you apologised to him?" Nie Huaisang suggested.

"I've tried that too, but he thinks I'm insincere.”

"Because you are!" Nie Huaisang pointed out, fighting a smile.

Wei Wuxian just laughed, but that was an answer in itself.

"Please, at least don't make him any angrier," Nie Huaisang pleaded. "He'll never be your friend otherwise!" 

Hearing him get so distressed about that, Wei Wuxian stopped in his tracks, his expression more serious than Nie Huaisang had ever seen so far. He was a little scary like that, something about his height and the shape of his eyes making him look cold and distant when he wasn’t grinning and laughing.

"Listen, Nie-xiong,” Wei Wuxian said in a voice that had lost some of its warmth. “I want to be his friend, sure. I think there's something interesting about him, definitely. I’d really like it if I could be close to Lan Zhan, and given the chance I’ll do it for sure. But if he only becomes friends with me because I start acting like someone I'm not, then we're not really friends, and it's not worth the effort."

“Wei-xiong, I didn’t expect you to be wise like that,” Nie Huaisang whispered, a little awed.

“Only you would find that wise,” Wei Wuxian mocked, and Nie Huaisang found that he could breathe a little more easily now that the other boy was laughing again. “If Jiang Cheng heard me, he’d say that my personality is too awful for anyone to like me! And Meng Yao would say something about compromises. I’m pretty sure they’re the wise ones, but I just don’t feel like acting so seriously.”

Nie Huaisang grinned, a little envious of such a bold way of living. He was not always likeable, according to a lot of people (himself included, when it came to the man he was supposed to become), and so he would never have expected people to fully like him as he was. Nobody except his brother, who had little choice in the matter, and maybe Su She who probably felt like he couldn’t be too picky when it came to friends, and… well, Lan Xichen seemed to like him as he was, too, but that was just because he was so nice.

It was so bold of Wei Wuxian to expect to be fully accepted as he was. But then again, Lan Wangji also wasn’t the sort to make efforts to get others to like him, so at least they had that in common.

As they arrived near the library, the topic had to be dropped. Wei Wuxian, with a grimace of fake agony, went inside to sit with Lan Wangji, while Nie Huaisang had the pleasant surprise of finding Su She about to leave the library, and free to spend some time with him. Lan Wangji had asked for his help to put some order in a section of the building while waiting for Wei Wuxian to arrive, and Su She couldn’t decide if he was flattered or annoyed that the request had been made to him rather than another disciple.

Su She ranted about that for a little bit as they walked away from the library, before complaining about his classes, and then about a letter from his mother who wanted him to send home some talismans because she was still convinced their house was haunted even thought he’d visited during winter and hadn’t noticed anything amiss. Nie Huaisang listened, and even reacted here and there, but couldn’t quite focus on his friend’s problem that day. Su She noticed of course, and asked what hung so heavy on his mind that he couldn’t even laugh at his description of a clearly fake haunting.

“I might have a silly question to ask you,” Nie Huaisang replied. “But please, don’t make fun of me for it. It’s kind of important, and I think you could really help me.”

“That sounds very worrying, but fine, ask me.”

"How would one seduce a Lan?" 

Su She gave him such a long, serious look, that Nie Huaisang started feeling he’d rather have been laughed at after all.

"So you're finally doing something about Lan gongzi?” Su She asked. “About time, it was getting annoying how clueless you are. And, well, if you want my opinion…" 

"Oh, no, this is about Lan Wangji, not Xichen-gege!" 

Su She stopped walking and fell silent for a moment, his expression turning complicated. He looked as if he’d eaten a very sour lemon that also happened to be moldy, all while there was a cut in his mouth.

"Lan er-gongzi? Really?"

"Yes. See, I think Wei-xiong and him could be good friends,” Nie Huaisang quickly explained, startled by that strong reaction, “so of course I want to help. But they're the two most difficult people in the world, you know? Xichen-gege is helping, but a second opinion never hurts." 

"Ah, it's just that," Su She said, instantly relaxing. 

He resumed walking away from the library, and Nie Huaisang followed.

"Well, yeah. Why did you think I needed help about Xichen-gege?" 

Su She hesitated, and even opened his mouth a few times to say something. Eventually he frowned and shrugged.

"If you're too stupid, it's not my problem,” he said. “Let's talk about those other two instead, since you’re so preoccupied. Aside from being equally good at fighting, what do they have in common?" 

Nie Huaisang crossed his arms on his chest and shook his head.

"Nothing at all." 

Su She nodded.

"Then I guess they need to fight again. Maybe in public."

"You think that'd help if they had an audience?" Nie Huaisang wondered.

"No idea,” Su She said with a wicked grin, “but I'd like to see Lan er-gongzi in a fight that makes him break a sweat."

Nie Huaisang poked him in the ribs.

"Mean. But… Wei-xiong can be pretty full of himself,” he admitted. “I guess I'd also like to see if he's as good as he thinks. How to get them to fight though?"

They’d reached a more isolated part of the Cloud Recesses, a small garden that rarely saw much use, just at the border to the wilderness. They found a bench, and after removing some dead leaves they sat there to continue chatting in peace.

"In two days, you get a day off from lectures, right?” Su She asked. “Get your Wei-xiong to the training grounds after lunch. Lan er-gongzi is always there at that time on a free day, and I'll do my best to be as well. It'll be pretty easy to get them to spar." 

"Su-xiong you're just the best!” Nie Huaisang exclaimed, hugging his friend who barely even grumbled against such effusions. “What would I do without you?" 

"You'd be less efficient for sure. Now can we talk about something less boring than Lan er-gongzi?”

“Yes, yes! Tell me more about your parents’ haunting, I’ll really listen now! If it’s not a ghost, then what is it?”

Pleased to return to a more fun subject, Su She started discussing his theory about some wild cats and a few squirrels that he suspected to have found their way into the currently disused ‘haunted’ room, and talked about it with such indignation that Nie Huaisang was soon in tears from how hard he laughed.

-

Although nobody had been warned of the duel to come, a small crowd had quickly assembled around the training grounds once it became understood that Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian were having a friendly fight. They were both reputed to be insanely skilled after all, and rumours about their first duel under the moonlight had spread fast. 

So far, Nie Huaisang had to admit that both boy's reputation was deserved. If anything, they were both more talented than he would have expected. They exchanged blows and parried them as if it were easier than breathing, making for a beautiful show. Su She, who stood on Nie Huaisang's right at the very edge of the training grounds, appeared consumed with admiration and envy. He'd fallen silent a while ago, and perhaps regretted this fight he'd helped organise. 

On Nie Huaisang's left, Jin Zixuan was almost as upset, just a little better at concealing it. 

"I can't believe such talent has been wasted and given to the world's most obnoxious person," he complained as Wei Wuxian dodged a blow. 

"Apparently, that's also Lan Wangji’s opinion," Nie Huaisang cheerfully replied. "But I think he's warming up to Wei-xiong now." 

Lan Wangji, after a moment of surprise at the way Wei Wuxian had avoided his attack, lunged at him again with renewed vigour. 

"Yes, I can see they're on their way to becoming best friends," Jin Zixuan sneered. "Well, that's getting boring. I was hoping to see Wei Wuxian put in his place, but now he's just going to be more insufferable. I'll see you later, Nie gongzi." 

He left, but the spot next to Nie Huaisang didn't remain empty for very long. Lan Xichen quickly made his way there. Nie Huaisang immediately smiled at him, but unlike the rest of them, Lan Xichen didn't appear to pleased by the show. 

"Huaisang what's going on here?" he asked. "What are they fighting about? Did something happen?" 

"Oh they're just fighting for the sake of it!" Nie Huaisang cheerfully explained, only for Lan Xichen to look even more distressed. 

"Wangji got into a fight without reason? How?" 

Alerted by his tone, Su She tore his eyes from the fight and gave Lan Xichen a quick bow. 

"Lan gongzi needs not worry. They're not actually fighting, this is only a friendly spar." 

"Yes, we thought it'd be good for them, so we made it happen," Nie Huaisang confirmed. “I think it’s going great! Wei-xiong looks like he’s having the time of his life!”

Reassured that no rules were broken and no serious harm was intended by either party, Lan Xichen finally properly looked at the ongoing duel. He observed the two fighters for a moment before eventually nodding.

“Wangji too is enjoying this,” he said after some consideration. “I’m glad for him. It is so rare for him to get an opponent of his level. Other juniors are rarely a match, and adults won’t spar with him because they don’t want to lose to someone so young. You had a good idea, Huaisang.”

“Oh, that wasn’t even my idea,” Nie Huaisang replied, beaming. “It was Su-xiong who suggested it, and who asked to see them spar.”

Lan Xichen turned his attention to Su She, who appeared a little uncomfortable. Nie Huaisang realised, a little late, that scheming to make people fight, even in a friendly manner, was probably against some of Gusu Lan rules.

“I am glad you have such a good friend helping you set your plan in motion,” Lan Xichen said with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Still, don’t drag him into too much mischief. I would be very disappointed in you, Huaisang, if you caused Su-shidi to get in trouble. He’s worked so hard to prove himself to our teachers, let’s not ruin his efforts just because you like to have a little too much fun.”

“Of course not!” Nie Huaisang exclaimed. “Su-xiong, you wouldn’t let me cause you real problems, right?”

“I only agree with Nie gongzi’s ideas if they don’t contradict the rules,” Su She confirmed, bowing again toward Lan Xichen. “And I wouldn’t let Nie gongzi do anything dangerous or ill-advised. Lan gongzi can be at peace, I won’t let anything happen to his friend.”

Lan Xichen smiled stiffly. 

"I know I can trust Su-shidi to take good care of Nie gongzi. I am… quite happy to leave him in your hands, where I know he'll be safe." 

It was a rather odd way to say that, and there was something a little too cold in Lan Xichen’s tone which did not quite please Nie Huaisang. But Su She himself seemed unbothered, so this might just have been Nie Huaisang imagining things. It was probably just that Lan Xichen still remained doubtful regarding Lan Wangji’s potential friendship with Wei Wuxian, which had to affect his mood.

But things really were going quite well. In fact, they were going much better than Nie Huaisang had hoped. After fighting a little more, Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian eventually stopped when a Lan teacher approached them to explain that he needed the training grounds for his own class. There didn’t appear to be a clear winner between them, as far as Nie Huaisang could say. Later, when he asked Su She, his friend gave his more expert opinion that although they had completely different fighting styles, they were equals in strength and capacity. It would be interesting, he said, to see them fight side by side instead of against each other.

For now though, they politely bowed to each other, and Wei Wuxian, grinning more brightly than Nie Huaisang had ever seen him yet, asked if they might train together again in the future.

It was quite funny to see Lan Wangji’s conflicted expression. On one hand, Wei Wuxian was nearly a criminal in his eyes, who had disrespected his uncle, broken many rules, and cheated during an exam, all of which was unforgivable and marked Wei Wuxian as beneath his consideration. But at the same time, this looked to have been a very fun sparring session, Lan Wangji had been forced to use all his skill to keep up with his opponent, and that was something too precious to be easily dismissed.

At a loss, Lan Wangji turned to look at his brother, hoping for guidance. Lan Xichen, in turn, only briefly glanced at Nie Huaisang before nodding at his brother with an encouraging smile.

“Behave in class,” Lan Wangji ordered with a slight frown, before turning away.

Wei Wuxian looked disappointed by what he must have mistaken for rejection, but Nie Huaisang saw that answer for what it was and ran to his friend to explain that Lan Wangji had, in fact, very warmly agreed to fight him again.

[demiace-wen-ning]

Just a silly little one-shot about Modern!AU Jin siblings doing absolutely nothing because I love them and wished we had gotten more of them (although, considering canon that's probably for the best).

-------------------------------------------------------

"Girls are pretty," Qin Su mumbled, her face buried into the nest of pillows and blankets she had made for herself on the sofa.

"Girls are very pretty," A-Yao agreed from face down position on the floor. He had not moved from there ever since he entered the room and didn't seem like he was going get up anytime soon. "But Xichen-ge is prettier."

"Shut up about Xichen-ge. Shut up about Xichen-ge," Mo Xuanyu groaned. "Also, boys are prettier."

"Says who?" Jin Zixuan shot back. "Also get off of me. My shoulder's numb."

"No... Xuan-gege comfy," he replied, only latching onto his older brother tighter.

It had been a long week for the four of them. College (school for Mo Xuanyu) had been wearing them out and they were all grateful that they could finally take a break from... well everything.

Their father had taken to bringing Jin Zixuan more frequently to work with him so he could get a glimpse of his future as the next CEO after his father retired. The oldest even had to skip a few of his college classes, in order to accompany him.

At least this meant their father laid off of Jin Guangyao more so than usually, actually allowing him time to focus on his own classes, something he struggled to do regularly, since his father would demand he always remain at his side at the company, and even help Mo Xuanyu with his Maths.

The four siblings had decided to all spend the rest of the weekend at A-Yao's, where he lived with Mo Xuanyu after the younger's mother passed away, apartment, taking a break from the turmoil of week.

Mo Xuanyu had rented a few movies from CD shop downtown where his friend A-Qing worked at. They mostly consisted of early 2000s rom-coms and a few Gong Li classics because Qin Su would die for her. No horror movies though. After watching the Exorcist, they had made a pact against it, mostly because A-Yao did not want another noise complaint after all three of his siblings screaming last time.

Right now all four of them were curled up in the living room, doing absolutely nothing. As he lay on the floor, A-Yao noted that it was a rather nice change to be relaxing and surrounded by his siblings. Much better than spending all day at the company, listening to the demands of both his father and other worker who had taken to treating him like a servant.

"I want pizza." Mo Xuanyu announced, sitting up.

"You had pizza yesterday," Qin Su replied.

"I want more."

"I'll cook something in a while. Just not now," A-Yao said, stretching a little.

"Why not just get take out from that shop Yanli-jie works at?" Qin Su asked. This caused Jin Zixuan to sudden straighten at the sound of Jiang Yanli's name.

But before he could reply, Mo Xuanyu shook his head. "Xuan-gege will only end up trying and failing to flirt with her."

A pillow then hit his face and Jin Zixuan scowled at him. "Just because I compliment her cooking skills, it doesn't mean I'm flirting with her."

Qin Su snorted. "Complimenting? You called her soup slightly above adequete the other day."

"And complained that the breadsticks the restaurant served were stale."

"And the dishware cheap."

"And-"

"Shut up! Shut up!" He shouted, his cheeks ablaze as he pushed Mo Xuanyu off of him, to the younger's displeasure.

"Alright, let's not fight. I'm sure Yanli-jie understood the sentiment," A-Yao tried to reason with them.

Jin Zixuan sniffed, turning his head away. "That's it. A-Yao's my only brother. You two can rot for all I care."

Qin Su let out an strangled gasp. "You're so mean, Xuan-ge."

"Also," he continued, pretending not to hear her. "Do whatever you like but I'm not paying this time."

This caused the rest of them to pause and turn to Jin Zixuan with expectant expressions. This only served to offend their brother even more.

"I'm just a walking ATM machine to all of you, aren't I?" He glared at them accusingly.

"No, no, Xuan-ge. You completely misunderstand," A-Yao shook his head appeasingly.

"You're our oldest brother and we all love you very much," Qin Su continued.

Jin Zixuan continued to look skeptical.

"Plus, we'd starve to death without you. You'd be an only child then. You wouldn't want that," Mo Xuanyu piped.

Qin Su and A-Yao locked eyes with one another, their expressions weary. It was clear that they were thinking the same thing. It would take a lot more than their deaths for Jin Zixuan to be an only child, considering their father's... nightly outings.

"Whatever," Jin Zixuan rolled his eyes. "But I get to choose what we're eating."

Mo Xuanyu cheered.

"Xuan-gege you're the best," Qin Su gushed adoringly.

"Yeah, yeah, you're both brats. A-Yao, put something on the TV."

"Preferably something Studio Ghibli," Qin Su said, lying down on the pillow Jin Zixuan had thrown at her. "We've watched enough rom-coms to last us a lifetime."

"There is no such thing," Jin Zixuan and A-Yao exclaimed.

"I wanna watch Howl," Mo Xuanyu demanded. "Howl sexy."

"Howl doesn't know how to fold his own bed," Qin Su retorted. "How is he sexy?"

Mo Xuanyu gasped. "You take that back."

Qin Su continued "Sophie though. Sophie literally becomes an old lady and instead of crying her head off, she just gathers up her shit and heads out to break the curse. What is more sexier than a woman with a braincell?"

A-Yao motioned his hand in a way to get them to calm. "Okay, okay, don't fight. I'll put it on."

The opening credits started rolling in, all the occupants in the room quieted down as they focused on the movie. Mo Xuanyu huddled closer into his brother's side, resting his head on his shoulder, something which Jin Zixuan did not reprimand him about again.

Qin Su nudged Jin Guangyao with her foot, causing him to look up at her questioningly. She moved in a little, repositioning herself to make space and tapped at the spot next to her.

Yes, A-Yao decided, as he got up and sat down next to his sister, making himself comfortable inside her little nest. It really was a nice change, relaxing with his siblings. Very nice.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 11 second part

(Masterpost) (Other Canary Absurdity) 

Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

Message from the Lan Clan

After dinner the Yunmeng bros go to talk to Jiang Fengmian in his study. They're quiet and respectful here, with no shoulder-shoving or arguing. This scene has such Brady Bunch energy, where Dad's Study is the Man Place where boys come to talk about Serious Things.

The boys tell Dad Jiang about the Yin Iron and he says yeah, I know. This is probably why he let them run off on their road trip without punishing them, but he could have, like, shared data with them so they might have actually achieved something related to the Yin Iron, rather than just wandering around the countryside bonding with Lan Wangji and Nie Huaisang.

He shows them a letter from the Lans that basically says the Lan Clan is in the shit, and he tells them they've got to go to the Wen indoctrination because otherwise they will also be in the shit. 

He gives the boys a warning about the Yin Iron, which is that 

1. it can be refined and 

2. if you refine it carefully, it will not control you. 

Awesome tip, will definitely use, thanks pop.

(more behind the cut)

Jiang Cheng wants to argue about going to the Wen party, but Wei Wuxian vocally gets on board, not leaving any opportunity for whining. 

Wei Wuxian is only sucking up a little bit in this scene. He obviously has a lot of affection for Jiang Fengmian, but WWX doesn't play up to his favoritism nearly as much as he could. Compare, for example, how he leans into Yanli's preferential treatment of him.  

Fight Outside the Cold Cave

Over on the Gusu side of the country province township, the disciples have gathered outside the cold cave that previously none of them knew about, and Su She is freaking out. 

Most of the acting in The Untamed is naturalistic, but then there are occasional characters who are portrayed with a much more theatrical, broad style. Su She's villainy is not given a lot of layers; he's playing a type, more than a person.

Many of the villains in The Untamed are played this way, but not all. Wen Zhuliu, for example, is a genuinely horrifying bad guy while also conveying depth and ambivalence--despite having hardly any lines. And JGY is a masterpiece of a performance. For Su She, the directors or the actor have opted for "sniveling backstabber" as a type, which is unfortunate, because it robs his final scenes of emotional impact.

Lan Qiren tells the disciples to get to safety. He rushes forward, gamely getting his ass kicked by human cuisinart Wen Xu.  He's not as effective a warrior as either of his nephews but he's a brave S.O.B.

Hanguang Jun to the Rescue

Before things can go completely pear-shaped, Lan Wangji sails in with his guqin.

The Blue Steel technique of the Lan Clan

Like many gifted learners, Lan Wangji's musical abilities are more advanced than his social skills. Here he musically makes the ground literally explode, almost as if it had been specially rigged with incendiary charges.  

Lan Wangji is very pretty when he's worried, and his affection and concern for his uncle is touching. He's 100% not interested, as we will see, in Lan Qiren's whole "lets all die for the future of the Lan Clan while my nephews hide" agenda. He's on his own agenda of smiting the wicked and protecting the weak.

Notice how Su She is standing right next to Lan Qiren here, even holding his arm? The next thing that Lan Qiren says is to tell all the disciples to keep up as they run into the cave. Somehow Su She totally does not keep up, and he gets caught outside along with a bunch of other disciples.

Giving Up

Wen Xu and his men kill most of the other caught disciples, and then threaten Su She, asking him how to get into the cave. In fear for his life, he tells them. Not cool, Su She, but possibly forgivable. Although when you voluntarily join a, you know, battle cult, physical courage is kind of an important qualifier.

But this shit here...

They didn't fucking ask about the books, douchebag.  

Su She was there in Lan Qiren's house when the two heads of his clan knelt to each other, each claiming the right to be the one to stay behind and die. And he heard Lan Qiren say that the ancient books are the foundation of the clan and that only if LXC and the books survive, will the clan continue. By giving up both men, and pointing out the book situation, Su She has totally earned his expulsion. 

Lan Wangji Takes a Stand

Lan Wangji decides, for the first but not last time, to openly defy his uncle...and it's got nothing to do with Wei Wuxian. Lan Wangji is a hero, who follows the dictates of his conscience. His conscience is extremely filial and extremely orthodox, but he’s got a growing open-minded streak.  This is going to cause a whole lot of conflicts for him over the next few years.

This time, however, he manages to skate out from under the whole disobedient, unfilial thing by citing Lan Yi's directive, which means Lan Qiren has to accept it because she's his predecessor and elder relative (She is probably not a literal ancestor, since she spent her life in a cave putting fucking headbands on fucking rabbits which probably didn’t leave time for having babies).

This is a pretty extraordinary moment for Lan Wangji and for Lan Qiren, because Lan Wangji just asserted his own form of authority to do the exact opposite of what Lan Qiren wanted, and Lan Qiren just sucked it up and let him.

It's also very different from western stories involving a holy McGuffin such as the Yin Iron. Lan Wangji's solution of "fuck it, just let the bad guys have it, it's not worth so many people dying for" is refreshing and surprising to me, a westerner raised on The One Ring, the Grail, the Death Star Plans, etc.

Lan Wangji steps out of the cave and uses a sword blast to save Su She, the ungrateful bastard, from getting stabbed by Wen Xu. Then he surrenders, and they break his leg to slow him down. This does not actually incapacitate him, because he is Lan Fucking Wangji, already a BAMF at like 17 years old. When they whack his leg, his chunk of Yin Iron falls out onto the ground.

That thing was in a magic bag of holding before. So...it just falls out when you whack him? If they whack him again will his guqin fall on the ground? What about candy?

Archery Practice at Lotus Pier

Meanwhile, back at Lotus Pier, the brothers are enjoying some quality time together before they head to the hostage-taking indoctrination.

Wei Wuxian is such a great cultivator that he can hit a distant target even when he jerks his bow upwards as he releases the arrow.

Jiang Cheng seems fairly pleased, and proud of his brother. He's competitive and fundamentally grumpy but not, at least here, a sore loser.

Club Ruohan

We go over to Da Club, where Wen Ruohan is yelling at Wen Qing for letting Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian go. He names them both, so they're becoming more and more known to their enemies. Which is not a good thing.

He menaces her with the zombie mosh crew, having them kill a dude in front of her and then saying her baby brother will be next in the circle of zombies if she tries any more stunts. Neither of them can imagine how much zombie ass her baby brother is going to kick, later in his (un)life.

Side note: What is up with WRH’s hair? Why bother pulling your hair up over your ears if you're going to leave an enormous curtain of it over your face? It's because he knows there's a wind machine next to his throne, isn’t it?

Leaving Lotus Pier

Jiang Cheng: when I ran off earlier in the year on my road trip you didn't pack a goddamn thing.

Wen Indoctrination

Is it even possible to stand next to this much active volcanic shit and not, uh, die? I live in the tornado part of the US so I don't know much about lava (yet. 2020 still has 2 months to go). But it seems like it would be hard to breathe the air. Also they appear to build houses on lava piles, which seems imprudent.  I say that even as someone who plays The Elder Scrolls Online, which is full of lava towns and nonsense like “ash farming.”

Nie Huaisang is adorable at all times, but particularly here, when he's so happy to see his friend who *didn't* fuck his gege and then abandon him without an explanation. 

Nie Huaisang: I'm so glad I can count on Wei-Xiong to be consistent and not vanish for months, or become a traumatized shell of his former self, or, like, horribly die.

Jin Zixuan isn't quite as happy to see Wei Wuxian.

Wen Chao enjoys the sound of his own voice way too much, and is malevolent and boring. On the plus side, he likes to stand with his hand stuck out in the air, which is fun for your resident photoshopper.

Nie Huaisang is so miserable every time he's holding a sword, or blade, or whichever we're supposed to call this. He's got his fan tucked into his belt, which is sweet. He is happy to give up his sword but don't you dare try to take his fan.

Meanwhile Wei Wuxian is worried about Lan Wangji, and Jiang Cheng isn't.

Lan Wangji shows up under guard, and takes his position at the front of the line, but without any extra disciples. The Wens let him change into snowy white robes after breaking his leg which will go well with arterial blood spray. He's focused and is determined not to interact with Wei Wuxian in this public context.

When I was little, I would sit near my best friend at church on Sunday, but not be allowed to talk to her until church was over, and it was exactly like this. She was good at churching and I was hyper and hated church. We are still best friends and these things are still true.

This interaction is like a thumbnail for the whole dynamic of these three boys: Lan Wangji outwardly ignoring Wei Wuxian while having many interior feelings about him; Wei Wuxian demanding attention and creating a bit of a scene, due to his very genuine caring; Jiang Cheng telling him to leave that boy alone for fuck's sake.

Lan Wangji: Stop trying to talk to me Wei Ying, I’m busy composing a song in my head about the two of us and our love for each other. 

[weiying-lanzhan-fics]

your love, unmoved by ravenditefairylights, TheOtherAsianKid

This was such a fun read! I enjoyed it all 😁

LZ just has the best internal monologue. Loved it!

Quotes:

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” the handsome man from the cashier line exclaims. He looks mortified, his face bright red and hidden behind his hands. Lan Wangji would say that’s really a shame; the young man is very pretty. He’s maybe a little shorter than Lan Wangji himself, with a contrast between soft, clean-shaved cheeks and sharp lines. “You tried to help me and I—aiya! You must think I’m so clumsy! I got your shirt all dirty—oh my god, I didn’t burn you with the coffee, did I? It was still rather hot—god, I’m so sorry! Hold on, wait, I’ll find you something to clean up—”

“No need,” Lan Wangji mutters, righting himself on his feet rather awkwardly. He’d noticed the man before in the supermarket—he looks to be around his twenties, much younger than Lan Wangji himself. He’s wearing a pair of ratty jeans and a sweater with a faded logo that looks like it has been ironed once, and his hair is tied back in a ponytail with some strands that have escaped framing his face. Lan Wangji doesn’t feel very inclined to look away. 

————

The text, as concluded, cannot be from his work or from his brother, but he’s still surprised to see Wei Ying’s name pop up. It is considered rude to check one’s phone in the presence of others, but Lan Wangji cannot deny that he is curious. He was not expecting Wei Ying to text him at all. Lan Wangji looks around; his uncle is deeply engaged in a conversation with some of the elders and his brother in another conversation with Sect Leader Su, and Sizhui and Jingyi are discreetly off somewhere in the compound that is not here. Lan Wangji angles himself a little better and checks his phone, almost choking on his own spit when he looks down at Wei Ying’s message.

Wei Ying:

Gege!!! ( ≧∇≦ )/ What are you doing???

Lan Wangji stares at the message some more and then at the various stickers under it, as if some more blinking is going to make it disappear. To his continuing surprise, it does not disappear. The message continues to stare back at him until Lan Wangji’s screen goes black from the inactivity. He turns the phone on again.

I am fine, he answers Wei Ying, because he is not quite sure what Wei Ying means to ask him with that question. It has not yet been a full four hours since they first met each other. Wei Ying’s reply is almost immediate—Lan Wangji supposes he was waiting for an answer.

Wei Ying:

Lan Zhan!!! You answered!!!!! \ ^_^ /

M, 83k

Summary:

Lan Wangi's life is very simple, and because of that it's also very predictable. He's a respected cultivator in his thirties, with a son and a class of Lan disciples to teach. And then he becomes Lan Wangji, a respected cultivator in his thirties, with a son, a class of Lan disciples to teach and a fake husband who thinks he doesn't remember their wedding because of the accident, and Lan Wangji doesn't quite know how to tell him that there was no wedding at all.

Wei Ying is not predictable. Wei Ying is the farthest thing from predictable; which is only confirmed when it turns out that he's been doing some lying of his own. In Lan Wangji's opinion though, neither that nor the conspiracy Wei Ying is trying to uncover matter as much as how his eyes crinkle at the corners when he laughs.

@child-of-the-fairy-folk

[kaz3313]

My Mom’s Sexuality, (low key) sex life, and relationship status of TGCF characters she knows (we are on Chap 70, so the second book btw)

(Also y’all can disagree, but like these are my Moms hcs so don’t like argue here 👁, okay. Free to reblog/react tho, I’m typing this out for a reason lmao)

Implied NSFW but nothing in detail

*Xie Lian: Gay, in denial, kinda. No knowledge of sex, thinks San Lang is suave and the best(tm)

*Hua Cheng: Likes Xie Lian (gay? Bi? Unknown). No actual knowledge on sex. Tries and Gege likes it. Good

*Feng Xin: Gay, but doesn’t know it+ in denial. (also she low key ships Xie Lian/Feng Xin and also Mu Qing/Xie Lian and sees them as fighting over him in Xian Le times)

*Mu Qing: Bi, doesn’t know/in denial. (She also had an epiphany and said “OH THEY LOVE/HATE EACH OTHER!! THEY THINK THE FEELING IS HATE AND THEY ACTUALLY LIKE EACH OTHER. HAHA” for Feng Xin/Mu Qing)

*Shi Qing Xuan: Bi, fem preference. Knows a lot, and tells “Ming Yi” about it. Likes tits, whether she has them or others have them it’s all good 👍

*”Ming Yi”: ? Didn’t discuss much. Pan(?). Is chill. Tired of hearing Shi Qing Xuan but @ the same time (My Mom) totally ships them (we love that)

*Pei Ming: Nothing changed from canon 😅

*Pei Su: Was conflicted, at first said he’d be similar to Pei Ming but backtracked. Straight, has a committed relationship w/ Ban Yue. She said “He better treat her right!! Or 😠😠”

*Ban Yue: W/ Pei Su. Had no other ideas for her. (But she does love her~)

*Ling Wen: Straight. Lots of guys love her, but she doesn’t give them a chance. Not in a relationship because she has other priorities. Worship kink~

*Qi Rong: Bi and proud (he eats WOMEN and MEN as my mom put it). Has a kinda Harem, but if he doesn’t like what they do he eats them (OKAy MOM). “Needs an intervention/to actually take the time for a relationship” 😌. Said yes rights to Lang Qian Qiu/Qi Rong, But I’ll explain the dynamic more below

*Lang Qian Qiu: Never got taught properly the birds and the bees (thanks Xie Lian), Is clueless. She said she can see Qi Rong making a nasty joke (while their fighting) and Lang Qian Qiu “You want to suck what? Is that like eating me?? No, you can’t eat me??” And Qi Rong being baffled enough to try and explain it.

*Jun Wu: Straight and has a wife who bosses him around. Says he’s too old to care anymore/has settled down from when he was young (LMAO)

*Guoshi: Old Gay man who has a flamboyant husband, but he himself can pass as straight.

Characters I forgot/didn’t ask : XUAN JI IM SORRY I SWEAR ILL ASK HER TOMORROW <33. Lang Ying and Little Ying (idk if she’d answer about these two tbh), We briefly talked about no need going over Xie Lian’s parents lol

Everyone else she’s only heard their name once or twice, so i didn’t bring them up

[bunsinyoface]

I finally finished reading all three Mo Xiang Tong Xiu’s novels as of 2021. 

[[[ FYI---> spoilers]]

Overall impression: the characters basically run off of a checklist of “Who would you want to Fuck, Marry, or Kill?.” (Excuse me if this already has been done before... my thoughts on a few). 

Mó Dào Zǔ Shī / 魔道祖师 /Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation:

Wei Wuxian:

Fuck Lan Wanji.

Marry Lan Wanji. 

Kill all who hurts those that I love.

 Also, Fuck rules.

Lan Wanji: 

Fuck Wei Wuxian, 

Marry Wei Wuxian.

Kill myself/ honor/ life, etc all for the love of my life 

Also, Fuck Wei Wuxian again for leaving me behind and fucking with my feelings.

Jiang Cheng:

Fuck .... (not applicable).

Marry ... (is that even on my radar?).

Kill all Wen dogs and wannabe Yiling patriarchs.

Also, Fuck Wei Wuxian for being the cause of my family’s despair and trading me for Lan Wangji.

Nie Huaisang:

Fuck... I don’t know.

Marry... I don’t know.

Kill Jin Guangyao. 

Also Fuck my brother for beating me up and Wei Wuxian for being the Yiling Patriarch.

Jin Guangyao:

Fuck Qin Su.

Marry Qin Su.

Kill everyone who thinks I am beneath them or knows my secrets.

Also Fuck the whole Qinghe Nie sect for being the death of me and Wei Wuxian for crashing my plans. 

Lil’ Apple:

Fuck apples.

Marry apples.

Kill all who stand between me and my apples.

Also Fuck Wei Wuxian for being a cheap ass cheaper than my legit ass’s ass.

Tiān Guān Cì Fú / 天官赐福/ Heaven Official's Blessing:

Xie Lian: 

Fuck San Lang.

Marry San Lang. 

Kill all who stands against saving the world.

Also Fuck Qi Rong, Bai Wuxiang, and Jun Wu.

Hua Cheng: 

Fuck Gege.

Marry Gege. 

Kill all who stand in Gege’s way and caused his sufferings.

Also fuck the heavenly court, its righteous ass, and the fucking world. My mecha-gege will destroy everything you stand for.

Mu Qing:

Fuck ... no one.

Marry ... no one.

Kill ..... NO NEED TO EXPLAIN. BE SILENT. JUST DO IT.

Also Fuck Feng Xin for being a friend to his highness.

Feng Xin:

Fuck Jian Lan.

Marry ......????.

Kill all who are not loyal to his highness. CURSE THEM OUT.

Also Fuck Mu Qing for being an idiot.

Pei Ming:

Fuck all I the women want.

Marry ......no one.

Kill Ming Guang.

Also Fuck the Rain Master for ruining my manly pride.

Chuān Shū Zì Jiù Zhǐ Nán /  穿书自救指南 /Scumbag System:

Shen Qingqiu: 

Fuck Luo Binghe....and papapa to save the world.

Marry Luo Binghe. 

Kill the system. 

Also Fuck Airplane Bro’s incompetent writing skills.

Luo Binghe: 

Fuck Shizun. 

Marry Shizun. 

Kill anyone who even lives and breathes around Shizun. 

Also Fuck everyone on Cang Qiong Mountain especially Liu Qingge.

Liu Qingge:

Fuck.....Shen Qingqiu??

Marry...….(do I even want this??)

Kill Luo Binghe,  Luo Binghe,  Luo Binghe, Luo Binghe.

Also Fuck anyone outside of Bai Zhan Peak... actually Fuck my Bai Zhan disciples too.

Yue Qingyuan:

Fuck ..... Protect Shen Qingqiu

Marry .....  Protect Shen Qingqiu

Kill anyone who threatens Cang Qiong Mountain  Protect Shen Qingqiu

Also Fuck Qiu estate,, MUST PROTECT SHEN QINGQIU.

Shang Qinghua:

Fuck  My King.

Marry My King (TBA).

Kill ....nvm Save myself.

Also Fuck Cucumber-bro for making me transmigrate and for being my anti-fan.

Mobei-Jun:

Fuck my servant.

Marry my servant (TBA).

Kill whoever.

Also Fuck what is actually happening, I’m just here for the ride (YOLO). 

[stiltonbasket]

This might be a bit vague for a prompt, but I would die for anything with parents!LWJ & WWX in the Qin Su verse or with Sizhui in that verse in general

After everything settles down, Wei Wuxian spends most of his time in the rabbit field with A-Yuan. The little clearing in the bamboo forest is always still and peaceful, with nothing to remind him of the chaos going on in the world beyond the Cloud Recesses--and best of all, his son is here with him, alive and well and grown up into a young man while Wei Wuxian wasn’t looking.

“But Xian-gege,” A-Yuan protests, while Wei Wuxian puts a drowsy rabbit into his lap. “You didn’t have a choice. You didn’t leave me at all!”

“I didn’t look for you before I left,” Wei Wuxian sighs, leaning back into the soft grass. “Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I just sat down and thought for a moment. I should have known that Wen Qing would never have taken you along to Lanling, she loved you like you were her own--but I ran out and left you alone, and if Lan Zhan hadn’t come for you...”

Wei Wuxian shuts his eyes. That particular if does not bear thinking about, and the only thing worse than reliving the moment of his shijie’s death would have been coming back to life in a world where A-Yuan had died of hunger and thirst because Wei Wuxian never bothered to search for him before journeying to Koi Tower.

He doubts that he could have lived in such a world, even for Lan Zhan’s sake.

“I love your fuqin dearly, you know,” he murmurs, watching the clouds drift by overhead. “I’ve loved him since I was eighteen, when I first met him, even if I didn’t know it back then. But I’ve never loved him for anything more than I love him for bringing you back, and raising you, and claiming you for his own. To me he is Hanguang-jun for that, above all other things.”

Sizhui’s eyes mist over. “Xian-gege.”

“Who are you calling Xian-gege in such a voice, ah? You’re not two years old anymore!” Wei Wuxian scolds, trying not to cry onto the rabbit clutched in his arms. “If you are, then you can still eat my spicy radish stew without complaining, right? I’ll go and make some for you right now.”

“Senior, no! Fuqin would be so disappointed!” A-Yuan cries. “You’re not supposed to strain yourself, bofu said so! And he’s a doctor, so you should listen to him!”

“Brother-in-law can’t tell me what to do. And spice is good for you, so I’m going to feed you some.”

His son leans over and grabs his thigh, and his hands--much larger than the hands of the baby Wen Yuan from their days in Yiling, but still much smaller than Jingyi’s, or Jin Ling’s, and even Wei Wuxian’s hands in this new, borrowed body--they cling just like they used to when A-Yuan was a child, and Wei Wuxian’s heart gives a treacherous quiver before he gathers A-Yuan up into his arms and kisses the top of his head.

“You’re a good child,” he says, trying not to cry. “You’re the best child that Lan Zhan and I could have ever asked for, and I would have had the world turned against me and my heart broken a thousand times over, for you.”

“You can’t keep saying that,” Sizhui says solemly, patting the new curve under Wei Wuxian’s blue robes. “My didi is the best child, too. My A-Niang grew him for me.”

Wei Wuxian throws his head back and bursts into laughter. “A-Yuan! You still remember?”

“I remember crying while you drew talismans, and asking for a baby brother,” his son tells him. “I never thought you would give me one like this, though.”

“It might be a girl,” Wei Wuxian reminds him. “Xichen-ge wasn’t able to tell. I have more yin energy in me than most women do, so he said that the little one would probably be a little Lan-guniang instead of another xiao-gongzi.”

Sizhui smiles and shakes his head.

“I’m sure the baby will be a boy,” he insists. “I had a dream about him.”

This is news to Wei Wuxian, since he always believed that such dreams only ever come to the parents of an unborn child. “Oh?”

“I was in the jishi scolding him,” Sizhui recalls. “He stole some of your talismans, actually. I think he was trying to stuff them down his shirt.”

Wei Wuxian’s breath catches in his throat. “What did he look like?”

“Like he couldn’t wait to get into trouble,” his son replies, with his lips twitching upward at the corners. “His ribbon was crooked, and he had moon-cake crumbs on his cheeks, and his hands were so black with ink and soil that I could barely see his nails. He was beautiful.”

He hesitates for a moment, and then--

“I think his name in the dream was Lan Yu,” Sizhui says quietly. “Yu for rain, and his courtesy name was Xiaohui.”

Suddenly, the light breeze in the clearing seems to fall silent, as if the trees themselves were spellbound by the name; and as for Wei Wuxian, he finds himself repeating Lan Yu, Lan Yu, Lan Yu, like the forgotten refrain to a lullaby sung in his childhood long ago.

“Sizhui and Xiaohui,” he whispers, holding both of his children close as he squeezes A-Yuan even tighter. “Perfect.”

[drwcn]

Being one more of the f!wwx au, I keep imagining how was the scene where wuxian tells wangji about his daughter? Did jiang yan already know? Did she tell both of them at the same time? Did jc let it slip in anger before?? I sooo wanna read this!!

midnight sun [snippet 9]

I will write more on this :D but some facts: 

1) Yan’er doesn’t know WWX is her mother. WWX told JC not to tell her. 

WWX : “I am back, but who knows how long I will be around. She grew up so fine. The heiress of Yunmeng Jiang is a better identity than the bastard daughter of Yiling Laozu. I’m already not much of a mother to her...if I take even this little bit of stability from her life, I... Once the matter with my resurrection is settled, I will leave. You don’t need to worry about that, Jiang Cheng.” 

2) It’s A-Yao, it’s always A-Yao. 

Jin Guangyao laughed from where he half sprawled on the ground. Lan Xichen lurched despite himself, his instincts still telling him to protect this wretched creature despite everything.  Her sword juenian 决念 in her hand, Yan’er placed herself between the oppositions, facing the disgraced chief of all cultivators and his lackey whose name she never bothered to learn. Su Something, his lips snarled and thick brows twitched as he sized her up. She couldn’t recall what she’d ever done to incur such hostility from this Su whatever, but at this point she didn’t really care.   “Shifu,” she spoke over her shoulder. “Are you all alright?”  “I told you to stay at Lotus Pier -” Gritted out Jiang Cheng at the same time as Jin Ling's exclamation of, “He’s injured, Yan’er-jiejie!”  Jiang Yan turned her glare to Jin Guangyao, sword raised. “You dare hurt my shifu, I’ll be in want of your blood as payment.”  Lan Xichen paled. “Jiang-guniang -” But Jin Guangyao only laughed some more. “Er-ge, my good er-ge, why be so formal? Don't call her Jiang-guniang, that’s so cold and just...plain incorrect.” 

Wei Wuxian and Jiang Wanyin stiffened simultanously. They so wished they knew how to use the silence charm for which the Lans were renowned. “Jin Guangyao!” Said man paid them no heed. Pushing himself upright, he said to the Jiang disciple, “Yan’er, what a filial child you are, coming to the rescue of your mother and father, jiujiu and dabo. I guess we’ll find out today if you live up to their reputations.” Jin Guangyao mentioned no names, but the way in which he laid out the intertwining relationships left no room for misinterpretations.   For a long, terrible, deafening moment, no one said a thing.  “I knew it!” Cried Su She over the storm, breaking the tableau, thrusting his hands into the air as though his whole existence had been finally vindicated. “Lan Wangji, oh the venerated Hanguang-jun, if only the world knew you for your depravity, for your hypocrisy! You bedded this demonic whore and sired a bastard that you then abandoned - mmm!” Lan Wangji stared at Jiang Wanyin, who for once met his eyes with neither hostility nor bitterness. Slowly, the younger Lan shifted his gaze, fixing them on the woman beside him who could not for the life of her bring herself to face him.  

Lan Wangji, what do you take me for —I once thought of you as my zhiji in this life  — Lan-er-gege don’t make me wait  —  please I want - I want - harder - more  — Wasn’t I good? Wasn’t it fun? If you keep frowning, you’re going to hurt my feelings  — If I were to die by your hand, my life would’ve been worth it  —   This child, I birthed him  —  C’mon, Lan Zhan, it was hardly my first time. It’s not your responsibility. I’m not your responsibility. — Lan Zhan, let me go ... — But back then, did you really trust me? — — Don’t, please don’t apologize. I wanted it, and I don’t regret a thing. I won’t. — “Wei Ying...”