#I’ve been wondering for AGES how he knew the Reeves and finally found that story

[philhoffman]

Phil with Will Reeve at a Christopher and Dana Reeve Foundation gala in NYC, 2007. Phil knew Will’s parents since his earliest professional acting days:

Dana and I were non-equity actors in the Williamstown Theatre Festival in the late 1980s. It was a very special time in her life. She and Chris had been dating for a while by then. But that could be intimidating. He was already this famous actor who had done Superman, and we didn't even have agents. But she broke down all of that by being so talented and fun and supportive. She made everyone feel like a best friend. Even after [his] accident, the two of them still came to the plays I'd do to show their support. It was very touching.

Will’s parents died when he was a hardly a teenager, his mother the year before this gala. He’s an ESPN anchor now and a while back he shared a sweet story about how Phil would take him to Yankees games and just hang out in the years after he lost his parents ⚾️❤️

[the-blind-assassin-12]

Resol’nare - Part Seven

A/N: This part has a lot of bits that I have been excited to share. There are a lot of pieces of my own HCs in here, as well as a few plot hint crumbs that I’ve had fun developing, so I hope you guys enjoy this one! (Also sorry it was late- we got power back late last night and I was too lazy to post after making dinner. oops. Don’t worry, I already formatted eight so this won’t happen again next week) Also, also... Fennec and Boba are fun to write :) 

*this story will regularly be using words in Mando’a. for a good list of references click here.*

Summary: The Mandalorian makes the journey back to Tatooine to take care of some things back at the covert after his run in with Navina on Nevarro. More is revealed about the goings on in the upper levels of Boba Fett’s complex, we learn what he and Fennec are up to, as well as a little more about how things are run below. And we finally hear what Bo-Katan has been itching to tell him. 

Warnings: descriptions of violence, death, talk of manipulating kids (if you’re unsure feel free to ask) 

Word Count: 5.6k

Tatooine. 

  The suns were sinking into the Dune Sea by the time he pulled Peli’s rental speeder into one of the hidden bays at the rocky base of Fett’s palace complex. There were three other occupied spaces, leaving just the one to his left empty. A quick scan of the vehicles that were there told him immediately who wasn’t. Fennec. Hers was the easiest to recognize. She had painted it a heavy matte black, accented with a weblike design of crisscrossing red lines. It wasn’t inconspicuous but she didn’t want or need it to be. If one of her targets saw her speeder and made the connection, it was already too late for them to turn and run. She liked knowing that they felt some modicum of fear or at the very least panic in the seconds before she struck, and he couldn’t blame her. They had it coming. 

For too long the scum that she and Boba were after had run nefarious crime rings that preyed on scared, young kids with nowhere else in the galaxy to turn. It was how they’d both ended up in their line of work, Boba swept into a life of violent instability in the aftermath of his father’s death, and Fennec developing a kind of admiration and a misplaced feeling of owing her employers for rescuing her from being sold to a brothel as a child. The slime had wasted no time in manipulating her, taking that gratitude and twisting it into something ugly and sinister, crafting her into a sniper, a trained, leashed killer, trading one horrible outcome for another. By the time she realized how trapped she truly was, the price on her own head had climbed so high it had very nearly gotten her killed. 

He winced thinking back to when he’d found her crumpled form in the sand. His thoughts had flashed so quickly to Grogu, to getting back to where he was and ensuring his safety, that he had only given Fennec a cursory check for any signs of life. Had Fett not been tracking the Mandalorian in search of his father’s armor, the woman would have died there in the desert. But the grizzled wanderer had found her, and saving the assassin from the brink of oblivion had given both of them a second chance. Fennec had been freed from the things that held her feet to the flames, and Boba had been given a reason to care for someone other than himself. He may have never been in any real peril on Tatooine- Not even in that pit if how I’ve seen him fight is any indication of how he handled that Sarlacc- but two souls were saved that day regardless. Though they worked as a pair and while Fennec deferred to Fett at first, she gave him her loyalty because she chose to, not because she was made to, and he gave her his respect because she had proven herself to be just as resilient as he was.  

Now, having taken the palace from the Hutt crime family and rooted out their presence on the planet, the two child killers turned vigilantes had started working on the galaxy’s other crime rings. Their sights were currently set on the Black Sun syndicate, and they had been working on picking away at one of their strongholds in Ord Mantell City, dispatching those who gave them no new information immediately, and freezing and bringing anyone who might have something useful to share back to the complex on Tatooine. Karga and the Bounty Hunter’s Guild on Nevarro had even been helping them, and more than a handful of the Mandalorians from the new covert had offered their assistance as a way to repay Boba and Fennec for providing them the space. Yes, they were taking the law into their own hands, but he had seen time and again how easily the New Republic could be made to look the other way, so he had no personal or moral objections to what they were doing. 

And so far they had brought three children under the age of thirteen back to the covert. The kids were being held captive as leverage so that the Black Sun leaders could keep control over their parents, often threatening them with things unspeakable should they refuse to do what their bosses required of them. The youngest was no more than five. After they’d been fed and tended to by the Healer and given a place to rest in the tunnels below, Woves one of the Mandalorians he’d first met on Trask, had set out to get in touch with the guardians of the rescued children. Since joining the cause to unite the clans, Axe had become increasingly interested in participating in educating and caring for the covert’s children, even assisting the Instructor in teaching new sparring techniques or sharing the perspective of someone who had grown up on Mandalore when it came to more cultural or historical lessons. Though he’d tried to make contact multiple times using the information that he had on the children- only their names and home planets- just the two older boys had been claimed by living relatives. 

The smallest, a girl barely reaching the top of Woves’ boot, didn’t seem to have anyone anywhere. Though he continued to try to locate the child’s kin, everyone knew it was only a matter of time before the Armorer was presiding over the gai bal manda, the man who had once been one of Bo-Katan’s most feared fighters kneeling in front of the entire Tribe and swearing to protect and raise the child as a warrior, as a member of his clan. As his own. 

Ni kyr'tayl gai sa'ad. I know your name as my child. Grogu. 

He felt a tug in his chest, just behind his rib cage as he dismounted the speeder, those big round eyes blinking at him from beneath that wrinkled green forehead and those over large ears filling his thoughts before he could guard himself. With a sigh, he wished for what could have been the hundredth time that he had been given the chance to take that vow, swear those words… Raise my son. 

Slinging his bag across his body and ensuring that the Darksaber’s hilt was clipped firmly to his belt with one hand, the other went to one of the leather pouches at his waist. Without needing to look, he pulled the small silver ball from its designated spot, spinning it twice between his thumb, index and middle fingers. We’ll see each other again. I promise. The metal sphere slipped smoothly in his gloved grasp, the object giving him comfort. It was something tangible, a link to the thing he carried in his heart for the child that had upended his entire world. Bo-Katan might understand Woves’ choice if she… He let out another breath and tucked the ball away. But all she can see is Mandalore. 

The sharp-eyed, orange- haired heiress was not too keen on her former companion’s sudden calling towards child rearing, but swearing an adoption vow, promising to care for a foundling, was such an integral part of Mandalorian beliefs, of The Way, that she knew better than to try to talk him out of it. She would lose any credibility that she had as a leader if any of the others caught wind of that. She still had Reeves, and Hast,  one of the few that had made it off of Nevarro, had also volunteered to help her search for other hidden coverts and lone stragglers in the far reaches of the Outer Rim, on the quiet, often overlooked planets in the Mid Rim, in the corrupt and crowded cities of the Core Worlds. And if she wanted more help I’m sure there are others who would go. 

He cringed, tilting his chin down to glance at the innocuous looking object knocking against the beskar tasset covering his left thigh with every step towards the tunnels he took. If she wanted, I could… He reached across his body to wrap his hand around the sword's grip. It still felt strange. Unnatural. I could order others to join her mission. Dropping it as soon as the thought crossed his mind, it hit the beskar beneath it with a loud clang that echoed in the dark passages that connected the speeder bay to the main hall. Leadership in a fight, in a battle, in negotiations, while all still outside of what he would have chosen for himself, were things that he could get his head around. But making demands? Setting punishments and enforcing laws? It was the things that ran in that vein of what it meant to be the Mand’alor that gave him the most pause now that the Armorer had assuaged some of his other doubts regarding the title that had been thrust upon him, unwanted. 

Thing after thing. Loss after loss. Responsibility after responsibility. That had been his life for nearly four decades, and it didn’t seem like his burdens would be getting lighter any time soon. For the first time since he left Nevarro two days before, he thought of the woman he’d run into there, whose stolen vambraces he was bringing back to be reforged. Navina. Though he’d only spent a few hours with her he had picked up the impression that difficult trials and heavy hardships followed her wherever she went, too. He wondered if that was uniquely Mandalorian, or if there were others who understood the same level of loneliness that sometimes came when such strength was constantly required of a being. She had spoken of her clan; of losing her mother and being separated from her father and the foundling that her family had taken in, not knowing after all that time if they were still alive. He knew the odds and she seemed clever enough to know them, too, and though he had sympathy for her, it also made him feel less like he was alone in struggling to carry an ungainly load. I have to remember to ask the others about her father… Harsa. That was the name.  

There were several things he had to do on this trip, asking about Navina’s family name just the latest addition to the list. After promising the Armorer on his last visit that he would begin training with the Darksaber, he knew that he would be spending at least two sessions with the Weapons Master, learning how to wield the legendary black blade. We’ll start with the beskad, though. He was firm in that and he knew that no one would argue with him. He wanted to check in with Fett, make sure that the arrangement was still working and that the man didn’t need anything from him. He had no doubt though, that if the man running things topside had any issues, he wouldn’t hold them back, not hesitating to contact the Mandalorian directly to launch his complaints. His directness was one of the things that he liked most about Boba, and one of the reasons that he had been so quick to trust him. I hope he’s free now. I’d rather start there then…

The last thing that he absolutely could not leave the planet without doing, was meeting with Bo-Katan for a debrief on the recruiting efforts and to begin discussing tactics for reclaiming their ancestral homeland. Hers, anyway. She wasn’t happy that he had put it off for as long as he had, but again, he knew that she wouldn’t voice her displeasure for fear of the optics of disagreeing with the Mand’alor. Politics. His top lip curled at the thought that he would have to get good at knowing how to keep people on his side, even when he knew that their endgames were slightly out of alignment with his. Maybe she’s in the sparring hall now. He knew that she spent hours training with Reeves and Hast whenever she came back to the covert, and he hoped that was where she was now. 

If he was being entirely honest, something about her still didn’t sit well with him, but he knew that he didn’t have to like everyone to work with them. 

Striding the last few steps through the winding passage, he finally reached the plain stone archway, a circular splotch of light from one of the torches visible on the other side of it. Two helmeted Mandalorians stood guard, but moved aside as soon as they saw the signet on his shoulder and the Darksaber on his belt. 

“Olarom yaim, Mand’alor.” The shorter of the two spoke with a nod, welcoming him home in a voice that cracked too adolescently for the modulator in the newly sworn fighter’s helmet to hide. A kid. He recalled the first few years after he’d finished his required training in the Fighting Corps, the cockiness, the harsh lessons that no amount of studying or practicing in the sparring hall could prepare him for. He’s just a kid. 

It was different though, the way that Mandalorians allowed Tribe members to swear additional oaths inducting them into the elite group of warriors at seventeen, than what the syndicates did, how they inducted their young members. We learn and train our whole lives for it. Understand what we’re agreeing to. Not like… He swallowed a sudden spike of rage at the thought that the quiet, innocent child that was likely still latched to Woves’ right leg would have otherwise ended up raised to be a mercenary -or worse- for the Black Sun. But she won’t now. 

“Thank you,” he responded to the young guard cursing himself for forgetting the Mando’a translation. I need to do better with that. Again he felt his thoughts backtracking to Navina and the way that he’d heard several Mando’a words roll easily off of her tongue. Maybe she can… when we meet again in a few weeks, maybe she can help me with… He sighed. There was a long list of things he needed to talk to her about when he saw her next, just like the list of things that awaited him at the top of the staircase he was currently climbing. He wanted to know more about her pendant, about the seam they had found in the metal that hinted at a modification that was made well after the piece had been crafted that would allow the Mythosaur to hold the peculiar stone that shone purple. He wanted to know more about what had prompted her family to leave Concordia, why they were running and why they’d had to separate. He wanted to know anything that he could from her and any other Mandalorians he encountered that might help him be the Mand’alor that the young guardsman and everyone else in the covert seemed to think that he was. 

As soon as he ascended the last few steps though, his thoughts were interrupted by a heavy arm falling around his shoulder. “Still in one piece then, Mand’alor?” 

Boba Fett’s gruff, gravely voice was oddly comforting, and he knew that he was likely one of maybe two people who thought that. He returned the one armed thunk that he supposed the other man took for a hug. “Seems that way.” The man’s heavily scarred face pulled up into a jagged looking grin, the expression almost jarring on such a serious visage, but then a rumbling chuckle came out and took the smile with it, leaving his features in their natural scowl. “Everything alright here?” 

The Mandalorian followed Fett through the large main hall, past the stone slab throne that he only occupied when passing judgement on those that he and Fennec brought back once any useful information could be wrung from them, and through to the long table that had been brought in for strategy meetings and sharing information with the Bounty Hunter’s Guild and others who agreed to offer help. “Everything’s fine,” he said with a grunt, gesturing flippantly with one hand, pulling a chair out from the table with the other. “The Princess wasn’t too thrilled when she found out she’d have to wait for you, but tell me, Mandalorian, is that woman ever truly happy about anything?” 

He had never so much as seen her smile. Pulling out a chair of his own, he simply shrugged. It seemed unlikely. “I’ll meet with her as soon as we’re through here.” Fett nodded. “I had… urgent business on Nevarro.” 

“Urgent?” One eyebrow rose on the man’s forehead. 

“Yes, I met another Mandalorian, only she was,” he tilted his head to the side as the image of Navina’s silver-gray eyes staring at him through her shattered visor flashed in his mind. “Different.” 

Boba answered with another gruff chuckle as he reached for the jug of spotchka that was never too far away. “Different, was she?” He took a long pull, the remnants of his teasing laugh still there when he lowered the jug and swiped the back of his free hand across his mouth. 

What? No, that’s- He leaned forward, elbows on the stone surface as he made a quick slicing motion with one hand. “No. That’s not what I meant.” 

It wasn’t. But as he dropped his palms back to the tabletop, he could recall the way it felt when he’d gripped her biceps, shaking her from her dreams. He had been concerned that she would hurt herself or more inconveniently, break one of the controls in the cockpit with the way she was thrashing in her sleep. But what he remembered now, hands flat before him, was how it felt to make contact with her skin, even if it was just through the thick padding of his gloves. He pressed his thumb down hard on the table like he had pressed it into the crease of her bent arm, squeezing the muscle there to get her attention. She felt strong and warm and solid and he almost held onto her for too long, caught up in the feel of another body beneath his hands. That isn’t what I meant. 

He cleared his throat and went on. “She hasn’t sworn the Creed, but she carries out the traditions, she can fight, knows things about Mandalorian history-“ he looked up at the man across from him, Fett abandoning his ribbing to regard the Mandalorian seriously. “She had a helmet and a dagger made of pure beskar.” 

“And you’re sure she’s not a thief?” 

Technically she is. But she didn’t steal the helmet or the kal. She didn’t steal the pendant. “They belonged to her parents.” He explained what the woman had told him about how her family had been split up- how she had known for a fact that her mother had been killed, but that since it had been years since she’d seen her father or the other child in her family, she had no way of knowing if they were still alive. “She… she asked me to spread word here at the covert, in case anyone knows where to find her father. Harsa. His name is Gavil Harsa.” 

Boba shrugged. “Don’t know any Harsa. But then, I’m no Mandalorian either. Your different girl and I have that in common.” 

She’s not my-

But before he could protest what had just been said, voices from the same entrance he had come through caught his and Boba’s attention, the other man standing as Fennec’s dry, smirking tone could be heard greeting the guard at the door. “You’re back.” He stated, opening his arms wide, his voice booming across the otherwise empty space. “What took so long?” He dropped his arms as Fennec maneuvered a carbonite block through the doorway. 

She cocked her head in the direction of the hardened, frozen slab containing what could have been any number of humanoid species, their features completely indiscernible but clearly contorted in terror. “Ixon here didn’t want to come quietly.” She turned to pull the block the rest of the way through, the unit hovering weightless and only needing her guidance for direction. “It was actually quite a workout.” She grinned. “For him.” Fett let out another gravelly laugh as Fennec turned her attention to the Mandalorian. “Mando,” she smiled and used one hand to push her long black braid behind her. “Good to see you.” 

“Fennec,” he nodded a greeting. “You’ve been busy, I see.” 

“Nothing for the Mand’alor to worry about,” she winked, shoving the block containing Ixon more roughly than necessary. “Just dealing with the trash.” She winked as she walked through, waving off Boba when he tried to assist her. “I’ll handle this one on my own.” She patted the side of the unit with an almost malicious gleam in her dark eyes. “It’s personal.” 

“I’d pity him if he weren’t walking slime,” Boba offered her the spotchka jug but she declined with a flick of her wrist. 

“He might not be walking when I’m done.” She gave the block another shove towards a door on the other side of the large room, her lips lifting in a quick snarl. “See you around, Mando,” she called over her shoulder, disappearing with Ixon, not waiting for a response.

“They say if you love your job you never work a day in your life,” he clapped a large meaty palm on the Mandalorian’s arm. “And Shand loves her new job.” That much is obvious. “Speaking of jobs, Mand’alor,” he gestured with his jug towards another set of stairs that led to the tunnels that the covert was using, the blue liquid sloshing gently as he did. “I’m sure yours is calling.” 

He stiffened. “Yes.” 

The man, gnarled by life and the things that had tried to drag him from it, set the jug down then. “Taking that planet back… well, you know what I think there.” I do. From first mention, he had not held back his opinion of the mission. “But bringing this many Mandalorians together under one roof? And they haven’t killed each other yet? I know you didn’t ask for this but,” he narrowed his eyes. “That’s no small feat.” 

It was as close to true praise as Boba Fett had likely ever bestowed upon anyone, and he knew that. It was also the truth. He thanked the man and crossed the room to yet another doorway that led to a different set of stairs. This time though, as he shifted the bag on his shoulder, the metal pieces inside clanging together, he did not stop on the landing and wait to pass off the reclaimed beskar to a middleman. This time, he continued down the second set that brought him to the forge. 

It was quiet, the Armorer taking a rare break from her unending task of providing the best protection and defenses that she could for her people. As a child it was easy for him to forget that there was a human beneath that pointed gold helmet. Her understated power, the sparks that flew frantically from her hammer, the ability she possessed to craft such stunning objects all contributed to the almost mythological status that he and the other small children regarded her with. He still admired and respected her and held her in higher esteem than anyone else in the covert, he knew that even the Armorer needed to eat, needed rest, needed to give her own ears a reprieve from the ringing of her tools battering hot metal. 

Entering the room for the first time since the covert relocated to Tatooine, he gave himself time to take the space in. Slowly turning his head he scanned over the work table, all of the tools neatly arrayed, each one clean and sharp and shining, each one a weapon in its own right. The forge itself was unlit, the mouth that usually spat fire simply open in a gaping yawn, but as he ran his hand over it he felt the residual heat that never completely faded. He wondered if what was left of the forge back on Nevarro still retained any warmth. 

Drawing his hand back, he stepped over to the small table that the Armorer used for meeting with the recipients of her work. Reaching into his bag, he took the vambraces that Navina had surrendered and set them on the surface between the two empty stools, leaving them for when the Armorer returned to her duty. She’ll know what to do. And where they came from. He would return to the forge the next morning to speak with her in more detail about the items’ provenance, and also to spread Navina’s family name to the member of the Tribe who was most likely to know it. He gave the room one last scan, slowly turning his head so that he could see it all through the eyeline of his visor, then left, continuing on with his own list of responsibilities. 

A handful of the covert’s children, some in the second hand helmets of the older ones, others belonging to clans that didn’t cover their faces at all times displaying smudges of dirt across round cheeks, were gathered in the widest portion of the hall. Engaged in some game that he likely played himself at that age, they shrieked and laughed and jumped. The kid would love it here. He could easily picture Grogu waddling into the group of young Mandalorians and fitting in without a problem, and he hoped that he had other children to be a child with while he underwent his Jedi training.

Continuing on and following the fork to the left, he headed next for the sparring hall. Unlike the forge, it was not empty. He could already hear the sound of practice staffs clashing, and the Instructor’s voice calling out advice to his trainees. One of the fighters grunted as they lunged or swung, and he knew right away from the sound that it was Bo-Katan, the heavy footsteps he heard suggesting that she was training with Hast. 

Since she was occupied at present, he stopped at the door beside the entrance to the sparring hall to arrange sessions with the Weapons Master. The man seemed pleased that the Mand’alor was ready to start working with the beskad in preparation for the Darksaber, and gave him his choice of available times for one on one training. Slating himself for three instead of the two he had planned on, he thanked the man and, with nothing left to do to push it off any longer, he entered the sparring hall and prepared to speak with Bo-Katan. 

She was still locked in a battle with Hast, the hulking man nearly twice her size but incredibly nimble for his weight and width. Blocking a swing of her opponent’s staff, the helmetless woman gritted her teeth and gripped her own weapon, holding it horizontally in front of her chest to take the force of the blow. Her feet slid back but she dug them in and gave a strong shove. Staffs still connected, the push set Hast off his balance just enough for her to turn the staff and whip it down and behind the man as he tried to regain his footing. In a sweeping blur she used it to take his legs out from under him, and he fell hard to the ground. Following all the way through to the finishing position, Bo-Katan flipped her staff around, jabbing it a few inches from Hast’s helmet, signifying her victory. 

It was impressive, but the Mandalorian knew that she was a skilled fighter, having seen her in live battle. She extended a hand to help Hast up, then turned towards the entrance. “You’re here.” It sounded almost skeptical, and he noticed the tiny twitch of her brow, hardly any sweat beading there after her workout. “Back from your,” she passed the staff behind her to Hast who took both of them back to the wall, the Instructor stowing them on their pegs. “From your urgent business?” 

He’d been expecting her to be upset, so the bite in her tone wasn’t a shock. “Yes.” He answered simply, not willing to allow her annoyance to spark his own. “I’m ready to discuss plans with you.” 

Her eyes narrowed, lips pressed together in a thin line as though that was the only thing keeping her frustration in. She swallowed, then let out a short breath and gestured toward the door. “Shall we, then?” 

The Mandalorian nodded and once she’d thanked the Instructor and Hast for the session, she followed him out into the hallway, the two heading for one of the smaller halls that had been designated for closed door meetings. “Thank you, for your patience.” He knew that she hadn’t been patient, but that she wanted it to seem like she had. “I had things to tend to, but I’ll be here for about two weeks, and I,” he opened the door to the room, letting her in before him and then closing it after he entered. Letting out a small sigh that he knew she wouldn’t be able to hear, he continued. “Aside from training with the Weapons Master I can spend as much time as necessary working with you.” 

Her cheek jumped as she gave a quick smile that was more of a forced smirk. “Well, that’s great news.” Pulling out a chair, she gestured for him to do the same, which he did. “Because we have a lot to discuss.” 

She went on to tell him that she, Hast and Koska Reeves had come back with ten adult Mandalorians from a covert located in the Mid Rim, and four children that had been part of their clans. There were a few that had chosen not to come back to Tatooine, but he and the others had all agreed that no one would be forced into joining them, that it was a decision only they could make for themselves. Still, adding fourteen to the Tribe in just one trip was something of note. For most of his life he had thought that his kind were far closer to extinction than they were. It was encouraging to see their numbers grow after so much time spent thinking that they were alone, and he hoped it gave the others that joined them there that same feeling of hope. That even if the quest to take back Mandalore were to fail, they would still have a safe place there where they didn’t have to hide in the shadows and only gather in groups of twenty or fewer. At least they were united now. At least they had a home.    

She went on to tell him about the old rebel base they had heard about on the remains of Concord Dawn, a planet in the Mandalore System that had all but been destroyed in the centuries of warfare that plagued that portion of the galaxy. Largely uninhabitable, and missing nearly a third of its mass, the planet had been abandoned ages ago. But it’s proximity to Mandalore made it a good candidate to set up a base of their own once the battle for their planet began. She outlined what would be needed in terms of weapons, fortifications and troops, and stated that once they had acquired and allotted the required supplies, she would like to accompany him on a trip to Concord Dawn so that he could see it for himself before the base was established. 

Agreeing to all of this, he listened as she laid out her plans for obtaining what was needed, giving her another two hours of his time before exhaustion started setting in so heavily that he wouldn’t have been able to listen to much more even if it was the most interesting topic in the universe. Assuring her that they could pick up where they left off the next morning, he excused himself from the small room and headed for the chamber that he always slept in when he was at the covert. 

He didn’t know why, but as he removed his helmet he thought again of the woman he met on Nevarro, and how he was about to begin a war to take back her home planet. Unbuckling the rest of his armor piece by piece and laying it out to be polished and cleaned, he wondered if she would ever go back to the place she was born once they had won it back, or if their own traditions would make her feel unwelcome there. Frowning, he hoped that wouldn’t be the case, that he would help build the kind of society that welcomed anyone who was an ally, whether or not they swore an oath. Would she take the creed? Pulling the breastplate cuirass over his head, he wondered if it was even something she would want to do. She said she wasn’t given the chance… what if she was? 

Shaking his head to clear her from his thoughts, he finished taking care of his armor for the evening, focusing on the lightness in his limbs that came from removing all that weight, and sunk into the mattress, finding sleep as soon as his eyes closed. 

But the head shake hadn’t cleared her completely, his dreams tinged with purple light and the echo of her name.

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Thank you for reading! Please feel free to let me know if you would like to be added to or removed from the tags! :)

tags: @something-tofightfor​​​​​​​ @alraedesigns​​​​​​​ @pheedraws​​​​​​​ @valkblue​​​​​​​ @malionnes​​​​​​​ @gollyderek​

[tonksie-writes]

A Mark and a Soul||Chapter 2

Summery: Din has always wanted to meet his soulmate. The moment that he met Cara he knew it was her. Now he’s all but alone in the universe he has to decide his next steps and she distracts him.

Rating: M (This chapter)

A/N: Ok! So I continue to have NO IDEA where this fic is going to take us so join me for this ride of unknown! I’m also shocked because I’ve actually been doing really well with keeping up on this! I’m not normally very good at that especially with no plan! If anyone has prompts or things they’d love to see I would love to hear them cause RN I’m flying blind!  This chapter has smut! It’s very obvious when it’s about to start trust me you’ll know! And it goes to the end of the chapter so if you aren’t a fan of reading that you can easily skip you won’t miss anything I promise! Also it’s been a HOT minute since I wrote smut and while yes I have my history with it I’m looking at you 20 pages of one BDSM scene  I haven’t written anything like this is a FEW years so please forgive me if I’m rusty. So please enjoy

Prologue, Ch 1 ,  AO3

Din has spent a lot of his life dreaming about his soulmate. He had always wondered what that person would look like, what they would be like. His parents had been soulmates and while mandalorians took an oath to give up their soulmates, just as they gave up their ability to show their face, Din had grown up on a planet where Soulmates were a constant. There were thousands of stories and fairy tales told to children of all ages. He had been told from the time of birth about all kinds of different soul matches. There were Prince's being saved by the daring princesses and knights in shining armor. There were even love stories of star-crossed lovers from different planets in different galaxies coming together to solve wars out of the bond. As a child Din had been enraptured by those stories and the thought of having a connection to someone that went beyond what he could see and hear. 

The bond was supposed to be this magic that knit two people. The very energy of the universe that knit two souls and allowed them to pick up on things in each other more easily. It was that thing that let you know exactly when your lover walked into a room. It was the prickle on your neck and tingling in your gut when your lover was watching you when you weren’t looking. It was something that went down to the core of you knitting you together beyond anything else in the universe. 

It had actually been the hardest thing for him to give up when the Mandalorian’s saved him. He didn’t think twice about giving up his face or anything else, even his name was easy to lose to the sands of time. He lost his family, his home planet, and everything he’d held dear and the mandalorians had saved him. They had given him a place to live and a reason to keep going. He was happy to give up anything to have a place to belong. But giving up the hope of finding a soulmate had been the hardest thing that he could imagine. It was the one thing he had wanted to keep even as he promised himself to the Mandalorians. Eventually though, he let that go just like he had everything else. It was the way.

 Din had second-guessed his choice many times. Every so often he would wonder what he would do if he ever came across his soulmate. He figured it was probably some lovely woman on a Backwater planet who had a beautiful smile. Perhaps it would be a dashing gentleman  with his own farm who would take him by the hand and make him want to settle down. Din had always imagined that his soulmate would lead him to another life, make him want something else, something different. That's why it was so surprising when the Rebel Shock Trooper that he ran into a rundown bar had the exact image on her jaw that he had on his.

 While on Sargon, Din had just ignored it. He assumed that it probably just was a trick of the eyes and he hadn't actually seen it. It wasn’t possible and even if it was he wasn’t supposed to let it happen. He was on the run, he had a foundling to care for. He had duties to fulfill and he was a Mandalorian. It wasn't just a trick of the light though. After he had taken off, saying goodbye to Cara, he had finally found a place where he was alone. He had taken off his helmet and looked into a reflective surface seeing rthe mark that was burned into his mind staring back at him. It was the one he had seen flashes of over and over as he fought with and beside Cara Dune.

Perhaps that was why he had instantly thought of her the minute he needed help. Of course she was a fearless fighter and unerringly loyal but she wasn’t the only one he knew like that, at least he didn’t think she was. He couldn’t think of a name or face for it though. He tried not to think it was that connection, that hope of the young boy on a planet far away and so long ago, that had pushed him to find her when he needed her. Over and over there have been times where he looked into her eyes and just wanted to tell her everything but he couldn't bring himself to do it. Then he watched his child leave after just getting him back.

 Watching Grogu walk away with the Jedi  had been one of the hardest things he could ever imagine.  He had grown so fond of his small traveling companion and now he could hardly imagine life without him. Din knew the kid had to go, that has always been the plan. Din would find Grogu’s people and then he would let him go, that had always been the plan.  It didn't make it any easier though.

 Then Cara came into his room of isolated sulking holding a bottle of some sort of alcoholic beverage. She was like some Goddess  from his deepest imaginations. A few words from her and suddenly the world felt a little more stable. It was a talent she’d had and he wasn't entirely sure when it had started. Somehow between fighting and nearly dying and coming back just fine he had fallen deeply in love with his soulmate and nothing was going to stop that.  He was so close to telling her right then and there. Instead he said he was going to go off and look for her; try to find her the woman sitting right next to him. He had hoped that with his helmet off she would come clean she would see what he knew. She had to have noticed. But she didn't say anything.

 For a moment he started to wonder if he hadn't been mistaken somehow. Maybe she just forgot what her own soul mark looked like. He wasn't entirely sure how that could happen but he supposed with all he knew about her background it wouldn't be a surprise. Maybe she was just so wrapped up in everything, maybe she just didn't realize it was him. Maybe he needed to show her again. Or maybe she just didn’t want him like that. Just as he was about to think about that too much, noises of a fight sounded up the stairs of the small ship and they were off.

 Din wasn't entirely sure if he was relieved or frustrated that the shouting wasn't actually a firefight with another ship or the Empire coming after them to hunt them down again.  Instead was Boba Fett fighting once again with Bo Katan and Koska Reeves. By the time he and Cara made it up to the top of the ladder Bo had Boba by the neck and Koska and Fennec were locked in a stalemate. 

“What the pfaask is going on up here?” Cara hissed as the two made their way into the room.

“Just a little disagreement. Nothing to worry about Mando.” Boba said with his charming and congenial tone that let both Cara and Din know that he was lying.

“This waste of genetic material is flying us into a trap.” Bo informed them.

Din looked between the four of them and his eyes narrowed at Boba. He didn’t have the capacity for this right now. He wanted to take Cara back down stairs or just drink away his soulmate and his son’s memories. Neither was an option in this ruckus.

“Show a little respect. We helped you on your mission.” Fennec grit out between clenched teeth.

“Enough!” Din said, finally getting everyone’s attention. “I’m grateful for everyone’s help. The child is safe because of all of you. I pulled you all from your lives and I understand you need to return to those. I am the one in your debt.” He said to everyone before turning to Boba Fett and Fennec specifically. “If you are willing we will drop Bo Katan and Koska off on Trask and Marshall Dune on Nevarro and then I will help you with whatever you need.”

“Not a chance.” Cara said, drawing the eyes of everyone in the group. “I’m staying with you.” She said with finality speaking only to Din. She had worked well with the girls as they took the ship, it was actually rather impressive and beautiful to watch as the four of them took out everything like machines. 

Bo hesitated and stepped forward “You have the dark saber. Like it or not you are the Mand’alor now. If we are to retake our planet you have to be at the head.” She pushed and he could nearly feel Cara’s glare at the redhead over his shoulder.

“To even look for more Mandalorians we need a ship that can’t be tracked, that needs credits unless you want to be in even deeper debt to Boba Fett the mission to reclaim Mandalore and find more Mandalorians will have to wait.” 

“And what do you plan to do to get that ship?” Bo Asked forcefully. “Run around playing bounty hunter for Boba Fett?”

“Marshall Dune has offered me work on Novarro. After I repay my debt I’ll work with her and come to Trask when I have what we need.” He said firmly his mind flicking back to the Ugnaught Kuiil he lost in the battle with Gideon I have spoken. “Or you could take the saber and do it yourself.”

Din watched the emotions flying across Bo Katan’s face and he had to wonder why the hell she didn’t just take it when he offered it. It seemed he still had a lot to learn about other Mandalorians. He had been raised by the Children of the Watch, apparently a cult, but still so much culture seemed lost on him. For a moment he thought Bo would strike out to fight him and he felt more than heard Cara shift behind him and all but growl out “Try it.” over his shoulder. 

Koska seemed to tense ready to defend Bo in an instant but Bo stepped back with a smirk and nodded. “Fine. We will return to Trask and gather what we can. The Saber is in the hands of a Mandalorian and that is what matters.” She said with finality. “If you would be so kind as to return us to Trask…” He could hear the insult on the tip of Bo Katan’s tongue but she finished with “We would be grateful, Fett.” and he felt his body relax some as he finished. 

Bo and Koska walked toward the storage compartment that they had claimed as their room and the other four stood looking at each other. “I appreciate the offer Mando but you do not need to stay. Fennec and I can take care of a small slaving operation like Fortuna. We’re even now. Our debt to you is paid.” He said offering a hand.

“Bib Fortuna?” Cara asked this time with interest in her voice. Din looked to her and as if she could see the expression of confusion she continued. “The head of the Hutt crime syndicate and known slaver?”

Fennec nodded “That’s the one.”

“He’s a high level target for the Republic. Dead or alive coming in with a Moff and Fortuna... “ Cara didn’t have to finish for Din to know the end of the sentence. It’d be enough credits to buy a ship and the repairs and then some. Besides that she’d be a hero enough to have as much leeway as she wanted.

“Are you saying you want to help them?” Din asked her.

“I’m saying I wouldn’t mind playing a part in the downfall of one of the universe’s most infamous crime bosses. I owe him for a princess of mine.” She said and Din wanted the explanation of that later.

“Then you’re coming with us?” Fennec ask.

Din simply nodded his head and Boba clapped and rubbed his hands. “Excellent. I won’t turn down the help! Especially when it comes in such a lovely package as Marshall Dune.” Boba flirted. Din tried to ignore the spike of annoyance that drilled into him, it wasn’t as though Fett meant anything by it. Cara was beautiful, it was just an observation. It still drove Din to want to growl posessively.

“Charming but I’m just here for him and to get paid.” Cara responded easily. The air of her words was almost playful. There was no bite or insult and Fett seemed to take it well. 

“Understood. Well, looks like I have coordinates to put in. You two should rest we’ll plan in the morning.” He offered.

“No more fighting?” Din asked. The question and tone once again made him feel like a father and he got another shooting pang of missing the kid. As if she could feel his sadness Cara was there, stepping up to his side a strong and silent comfort.

“I assure you as long as the princess stays in her quarters, I will remain at peace.” Boba charmed. It was enough for now and Din and Cara returned to the area below deck.

“You’re sure you want to come?” Din asked once they were carefully locked in the guest bunk the ship had for reasons Din was not about to think over.

“You can’t have all the fun.” She joked but he could see something else there. There was something she wasn’t saying, something tugging at her mind and heart. “Besides with the kid-- with everything someone’s gotta look after you.” He wasn’t sure whether he was grateful she cut herself off or if it hurt more. The pain of losing the child was overwhelming but it wasn’t a loss. Grogu was going to be learning, growing. He was where he needed to be. Now it was Din’s turn to look for  his own place.

He sat just looking at her for a moment. The silence was heavy and it almost felt like she could see him under the helmet. As if to break some sort of trance she reached over to the bottle they’d been drinking before the tussle up stairs and took a big swig. “Look, I don’t do well with feelings but even I know this has been a long day so I’m going to give you an offer and you’re not going to overthink it or freak out about it you’re just going to nod yes or no.” she instructed “Understand?” She asked. 

He felt like he had just been asked to calculate advanced hyperdrive mechanics without a datapad. He had no idea where this was going or what she was thinking but he also couldn’t fight her when she was standing there in front of him resolute and in control when he felt so out of control. So he nodded his head.

“Good.” she said walking over to the door and locking it before pulling off the armored shirt she wore leaving a dangerously tight tank top as her only covering. 

“What are you--” He started but she held up a finger.

“No talking. You take that bottle over to the corner. Have one cup, just one, and then I take you over to this rack and distract you. One night, no strings just you getting out what you need. You can even keep the helmet on.” She offered. “Or you say no and we never talk about this again.” She added.

Din didn’t know what to choose in this. How could he? Part of him wanted to ask her about the bond. What she was planning to do when it was solidified by skin to skin contact. They’d never touched skin before but he knew from the stories what happened when they did. Did she know? How could she not? When two soulmates touched they grew a bond that couldn’t be severed except by death. Even without the bond Cara could see more of him than anyone he’d ever met. She always seemed to know what he was thinking or when he needed her to duck left as he went right. It seemed like they’d been able to read each other from the moment they met. He wasn’t sure what he’d do if it got even stronger. He wasn’t even sure how it could.

He was silent too long, he could feel the time stretch and for a moment his confident Shock Trooper looked like her resolve was about to buckle. The momentary flash in her eyes was enough for him to make his choice. Bond or not he was going to spend tonight with his soulmate. The universe owed him that much. He stood up with the bottle and moved over to the corner. “I’d rather just turn the lights off.” He said as he walked over to a screen taking off his helmet. 

“That’s so much less fun.” She joked but he could hear the rustling of her taking off her clothing and he took off his own after downing the shot. Suddenly the room was completely dark. 

“Cara?” He asked into the darkness. He didn’t need to, he could feel her in the dark by the light controls. He could feel her blind eyes searching the shadows of the sealed room magnetically summoning him to her.

“I’m here.” She said taking a step then another. He walked from behind the screen towards her easily feeling where she was even without eyes. He could blame it on the soldier’s senses and all his training. He could blame it on years of being on the lookout for threats. He could lie to himself. Here in the dark with nothing between them but air as they took step by step he couldn’t bring himself to. He knew this was different. He knew he could find her in any situation without needing to look. Whether he could say it out loud or not there was no question to him that this woman was his soulmate and somehow that made this so much more important. 

His hand reached out on its own and hesitated just over her jaw before it lowered right onto the mark they shared. In a flash the coil snapped and they sprank at each other lips crashing tongues tangling and hands roaming.

In the dark with nothing but the sensation of her calloused fingertips he wondered just how many hands she had. One was in his hair the other on his neck then down his chest and on his biceps feeling every inch of him. He was sure he was no better as his own hand slipped from her jaw to her shoulder, his other smoothing up and down her side avoiding anywhere too forward. 

Her hands suddenly grabbed his and for a second he thought she was changing her mind. “It works a lot better if you do this.” She said, pulling his hands to her breasts and encouraging them to squeeze. She let out a lewd moan and that broke the dam.

He pushed her back against the wall seeking leverage to pull her closer. His hand went to her hip squeezing her ass and trying to pull up her leg over his hip but was surprised when she took that opportunity to leverage their weight and flip them so she was pressing into him. He shouldn’t be surprised this would be a fight. Everything else with them was. He could feel her smile and glee as they warred for dominance, her hands raking over his chest and nails lightly scratching making him hiss in pleasure. 

She pulled back from the kiss biting his lower lip and just when he was about to move his mouth to her neck her lips met his jaw just over their mark and a rush pulsed through his body. He was sure she felt it too from the way her hips ground to his and he pulled her closer, his grip on her hips bruising. “Kriffing pfaask.” He hissed trying to flip them again but she had his shoulders pinned to the wall as she kissed down his jaw with little nips. 

“That’s quite the mouth you have there.” She teased playfully against his skin and an idea hit him. His hand snuck up to pinch her nipple playfully rolling it between his fingers and her head fell back as he kissed her neck and used the hand still on her hip to pull her forward and force their weights to shift so he had her pinned against the wall. “That’s playing dirty.” She hissed to him.

“Keep up.” He growled playfully and her mouth was on his again pulling him in by the hips her hand going back to his hair and he was starting to wonder if she just liked the feel of his curls between her fingers as much as he was enjoying feeling it. Suddenly one of her hands reached up and she found a pipe above them that he’d noticed earlier hung lower than the others. She pulled down slightly to ensure it was strong enough to hold her weight and suddenly her legs were pulled up and wrapped around her waist. As he felt the soaking folds of her vuelva come into contact with his own hard cock and that was nearly the end of him.

His forehead fell forward finding purchase between her breasts and his hot mouth bit and sucked the skin on her sternum. “Please Cara.” he breathed into the dark.

“Now.” she breathed back a demand. It spoke to her strength that she was holding herself up on the tiny pipe as he shoved himself inside of her bucking in with a surprising ease. “Fark.” She hissed rocking her hips against him. 

“Let go.” He breathed to her as he set a slow gentle pace. He could feel her surprise tickle his mind and it warmed him through to feel the connection that had slid into place as they touched. “I’ve got you, let go.” He assured and she did. She dropped her hands as he took her full weight and easily navigated them to the bunk. As soon as her back hit the mattress she rolled on top of him and this time he didn’t fight her, he was certain this wouldn’t be their last time. It probably wouldn't even be their last time tonight so he’d have plenty of opportunities to take his turn. 

He lost himself in the feel of her hips and her depths. His hand went to her center and gently pressed to her clit rubbing as she angled her hips to a position that made her moan with every thrust. He could feel her hands on his thighs and his mind flashed images of what she looked like over him: Back arched and breasts bouncing as her muscles clenched and unclenched through her stomach and up her shoulders and arms. He cursed himself for asking for the lights off because he was certain it would be his favorite image in history.

With particularly deep thrust and a skillful press of her clit he felt her come around him and if that wasn’t enough to throw him into his own orgasm he heard her whisper his name “Din.” To the room and the squeeze of his heart threw him into the abyss as quickly as his body did. Rasping her name back to her like a prayer. 

If the world shifted and their lives changed, if they felt the tug of the bond they had both refused to acknowledge solidify, they both ignored it for now. Tonight was theirs to ignore the rest of the world. Tonight was about them. No strings.

[omg-imagine]

⊱ Forget Me Not (6/15) ⊰

Pairing: Keanu Reeves x Reader

Summary: After you wake up from a coma and realize that your memories from the last five years have been erased, Keanu works to bring back what you have lost.

Words: 3.1k

Warning: none 

A/N: Sorry for the late post but it’s still Sunday so I made it 😎. As always, hope you enjoy!!

Part 5

Trudging down the silent street at a sedate pace, you swore that you had been walking in circles for the last hour and a half. Your steps echoed throughout the desolate road, the early morning sun kissing your skin lightly as it rose, filling up the empty skies above with its gentle glow of light. Wrapping your arms tightly around your frame, you reached the end of the block but were unsure what direction to take next.

If only you had charged your phone before going to sleep last night, you wouldn’t be wandering aimlessly right now.

You knew that Keanu would wake up soon, and you needed to come home before then. You had woken up at dawn and couldn’t go back to sleep, so you decided to go for a quick stroll outside. You didn’t expect to forget your way back, and the phone you had brought with you was useless now that it was dead. The last thing you wanted was Keanu to worry about your sudden disappearance. You didn’t want to add any more stress to the poor man.

Turning right, you were met with another long row of mansions, each one separated by large and gated yards. You had never seen such luxurious homes before, and you couldn’t help but feel out of place. The last apartment you rented back in New York had barely enough space for one person, let alone two. The ceilings were always leaking, and the paint on the walls was chipping off. It was certainly not worth the amount of money you were paying every month.

Now, you were much better off. Never would you have imagined living in such an upscale neighborhood. Though a week has passed since your discharge from the hospital, you still felt like you were stuck in a dream. Maybe one day, you would wake up in the same familiar bed at the house you grew up in and realize that this was nothing but a figment of your imagination.

You didn’t want that to be the case, however. You couldn’t imagine yourself returning to the dreary life you had left behind. You wanted this one— the one where you seemed to be the happiest you had ever been. The one with Keanu.

At the mere thought of him, you noticed the small smile instantly forming on your face. These last seven days showed you how greatly Keanu cared about you. There was no doubt that you were important to him, and he loved you very much. You could see the pain in his eyes every time you glanced his way, no matter how hard he tried to mask it. It broke your heart seeing him look at you as if you were the ghost of the woman he loved.

But despite all, Keanu was patient with you. He has done everything he could to make you feel comfortable around him and in your home. Truth be told, you found yourself being naturally drawn to Keanu, unafraid to put your guard down when it came to him unlike with others. You believed it was merely because you were attracted to him, but it had to be so much more.

Perhaps your heart remembered him while your mind couldn’t, and that was why you easily connected with Keanu.

“Y/N?”

You suddenly heard a voice calling out your name, and you turned your head to see a blonde lady jogging up to you from behind. She was around your age and beyond gorgeous. You were quick to take note of the recognition on her face as she stood there before you with a huge smile. 

“I’m so sorry but—”

“Oh, shoot, I forgot you don’t remember,” the woman shook her head, slightly frowning. “I’m Molly. My husband Will and I live a few doors down from you and Keanu. He told us that you were in an accident a couple of weeks ago, and you’re suffering from amnesia.”

“Umm, yeah,” you replied, nodding. “I think Keanu might have mentioned you two before.”

“I would hope so. We’re all good friends,” she chuckled. “But how are you doing? Is everything okay? This must be a lot for you to take in.”

“It is, but I’m managing. I’ve been home for a week now, trying to settle back into my normal life and hoping that it’ll somehow trigger my memories.”

Molly sighed softly. “Wow, I can’t even imagine what you’re going through. Five years of your life just gone all of a sudden? So much has happened during that time, and I was totally a different person back then. I don’t know how I can handle all of that.”

“It does feel like I’m starting over, but Keanu’s been amazing. He’s doing his best to help me recover what I’ve lost.”

“Well, I’m glad,” she added with a smile. “Both of you are strong and wonderful people. As far as I know, there hasn’t been a problem you guys were unable to overcome. I’m sure things will work out.”

“Thank you, Molly,” you returned. “Listen, I’m a bit lost right now, and I want to get home before Keanu wakes up since I didn’t tell him I was going out. Can you show me the way back?”

“Of course! Just to give you a heads up, it’s quite a walk. You surely did wander out far, and it’s a good thing I caught you on my run.”

Smiling, you walked alongside Molly as she started to share more about herself. You learned that she worked as a model, and her husband Will was a businessman who often went on motorcycle rides with Keanu. Based on first impressions, you liked Molly. She was delightful and easy-going. You found out the two of you had become close friends after moving into the neighborhood. She even helped you with getting the job that you currently have.

By the time you reached your house, you and Molly were cracking up over the stories she had told. She was definitely the type of friend you would love to have a drink with and guaranteed a fun time. You had even made plans to come over her house for a cup of tea soon and reintroduce you to the close circle of friends you were a part of.

“If you need anything, give me a call, alright?” Molly spoke as she lingered by the front yard. “I’m that friend you usually bothered late at night just to rant or ask for advice. I want you to understand that you can still do that. I’ll be happy to pick up the phone at two in the morning and listen to what you have to say.”

“Okay,” you responded softly. “Thanks again, Molly. I’ll keep in touch!”

You waved goodbye with one hand as you took your keys out of your pocket using the other. Turning around, you were about to insert the key into the lock when the door swung open without warning, revealing Keanu, who stood in front of you, his eyes showing pure relief.

“I was out for a walk and got lost—”

You weren’t able to finish your explanation when Keanu’s arms suddenly wrapped around you, pulling you close, and it caught you by surprise. He buried her face in your neck, feeling the warmth of his breath fluttering against your skin. You heard him sigh deeply when you wound your arms around his neck, your fingers playing with the soft hair at his nape. The seconds that passed felt like minutes as he cradled you, allowing him to find comfort in your touch.

When Keanu finally stepped back, releasing you, you glanced up to his weary face, your eyes locking with his in an instant. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you. My phone died, and I couldn’t ask for directions since no one was out there yet.”

“It’s okay,” he assured, his gaze falling as he swallowed thickly before speaking. “I was scared that something happened to you. I tried knocking on your door this morning, and when I didn’t get an answer, I checked inside only to see you gone.”

“Hey,” you breathed out, placing a hand under his chin and tilting it upwards. “I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere, Ke.”

You watched silently as Keanu grasped your hand and lifted it up to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss on your inner wrist. You could see him relax a little, the tension in his face easing away as a tiny smile played at the corners of his mouth.

Stepping to the side, Keanu let you enter the house, shutting the door behind you close. “Next time, just leave a note. I was about to go out there and start a search party for you.”

“A note would have been smart,” you laughed. “I was up really early and didn’t want to disturb your sleep. Which reminds me, how did it go last night?”

“Slept like a baby,” Keanu answered, smiling. “I almost didn’t hear my alarm going off beside me.”

“That’s good,” you said, squeezing his hand.

For the past couple of nights, you and Keanu would start a movie in his room and cuddle in bed until he falls asleep. Somehow, spending that extra hour or two with him in the evening truly helped with his sleep. Once he was unconscious, you would slide out of his arms and tiptoe back to your room across the hall. There were times when you wondered what would happen if you didn’t leave, deciding to just stay there for the whole night. It was tempting, to say the least, but you still wanted to take things slow.

“How did you find your way back?” He questioned.

“I ran into Molly, or rather, she ran into me. Anyways, she introduced herself and later walked me home.”

“Molly?” Keanu repeated her name a bit reluctantly. “Uhh, it’s great that you got to meet her again.”

“Yup, she’s lovely. She also said it’s been a while since we went to dinner with her and Will. We should do that when everyone’s free.”

“Y-Yeah,” he stuttered, and you picked up the slight hesitation in his voice. “We should plan for one in the future.”

“I guess we’ll let them know,” you replied as a brief silence fell between the two of you, only breaking when Keanu spoke again.

“You have that neurologist appointment today,” he reminded you, and you had almost forgotten about it. “We should leave in an hour if we want to make it on time. It’s the middle of rush hour, and the traffic’s horrendous.”

“Oh, I’ll go shower and get ready, then.”

“No problem. You do that, and I’ll make us breakfast to take on the road.”

Grinning at you, Keanu then put a hand on one side of your face, slowly craning his head down. He was about to brush a kiss to your lips when he swiftly shifted away and planted on your cheek instead. You felt the heat rising to your face after realizing what he had almost done.

“Sorry, it’s a habit,” he apologized, his skin flushed with slight embarrassment.

Shaking your head, you flashed him a reassuring smile before leaning up and kissing his cheek. “No need to apologize, Ke.”

You ran your fingers through Keanu’s locks as you stood there for a few more moments, gazing into his deep brown eyes. There was still plenty to uncover about you and him, and as much as you wanted to know all of it right away, you needed to be patient like Keanu has been with you.

---

The neurologist appointment took up almost half of the day, and at some point, Keanu had taken a nap at the waiting room while the doctor ran tests on you. He could have dropped you off at the facility and gone home so that he wouldn’t be stuck doing nothing for hours, but he couldn’t bear leaving you alone. You had been quite nervous on the way there, afraid that they were going to find something wrong during the examination.

Fortunately, there was no need for you and Keanu to worry. The doctor assured that besides the amnesia, your brain was nearly healed from the trauma sustained from the crash. Despite seeming like an excellent sign of recovery, they still weren’t sure if or when your memories would return. Not wanting to give you any false hope, your doctor only instructed you to continue what you were doing— taking each day as it came.

As Keanu drove down the freeway with you in the passenger seat, he couldn’t stop thinking about what happened earlier that morning. His heart pounded wildly in his chest as he looked everywhere in the house for you. He had tried calling you several times, only to reach your voicemail after every attempt. Immediately, he thought of the worse. He was led to believe that you remembered everything again and left him as a result.

Keanu couldn’t even describe the immense relief he experienced when he heard the sound of your voice coming from outside. He had almost lost his composure after opening the door and seeing you standing there. He had just enough self-control to stop himself from kissing you, opting to hold you in his arms instead.

God, he didn’t want to let you go. He could never let you go.

“I’m in the mood for some coffee,” you blurted out as you stared at the scenery passing by.

“Coffee can trigger migraines,” Keanu revealed with a small smile. “You haven’t had one in days, but I don’t think that means you can go back to drinking cups of it.”

“Fine,” you pouted, turning your head to the side to look at him. “I’m in the mood for some blueberry scones then. Can we stop by Starbucks?”

Keanu chuckled as he glanced at you, meeting your eyes. “I’ve got a better place in mind that sells the best blueberry scones.”

The café was a short ten-minute drive from where you were on the freeway, and luckily, Keanu found a parking spot right in front of the building.

“This is Emily’s,” he pointed as he shut off the car engine. “It’s where we met up for our first unofficial date.”

“It looks lovely,” you commented, a soft smile appearing on your lips.

“It’s our favorite coffee shop in all of LA,” Keanu revealed before clicking his seatbelt off and getting out of the car. Quickly, he dashed to your side of the vehicle and opened your door, extending a hand to help you out of your seat.

As the two of you entered the café, you were immediately greeted by the scent of freshly ground beans. The interior was warm and welcoming, decorated with string lights and chestnut-colored furniture. Vintage photographs were framed around the wall as faint jazz music played in the background, overlapping with the hushed chatters of customers and the whirring of the coffee machine.

After ordering your drinks and pastries, you and Keanu sat in one corner of the room, your knees almost touching underneath the table. The entire sight and sounds reminded him of the same exact moment that happened nearly five years ago. It felt as though he were reliving the morning he spent with you weeks after your initial meeting. He could vividly recall how nervous he was on that day since that was the first time in a while he was interested in someone.

“You’re right,” you giggled, brushing away the crumbs off your face. “These scones are fantastic, and I love their chamomile tea.”

“I told you it was the best,” Keanu grinned, taking a sip of his black coffee. “I found this gem while I was filming a movie years before we met.”

“Well, I think I found my new favorite coffee spot,” you said before emptying your cup with one last sip. “Speaking of, do you have any exciting projects lined up?”

“Actually, I don’t. I, uh, decided to take a year off.”

You raised a brow at him. “Oh, why? I thought you enjoyed working?”

“I do, but I just completed a film months ago, and I feel like I need a break.”

“This doesn’t have anything to do with me, right?” You asked tentatively.

Keanu remained quiet as you stared at him. The truth was he did sign on for a movie shooting in late October but dropped out of it recently. Aside from that, he canceled other engagements in the upcoming months, wanting to put all of his time and focus on you.

It’s the least he could do after everything.

“Ke?” You uttered his name softly.

He released a heavy sigh. “I think it’s better if I stay home for now, you know? I want to be there to make sure that you’re doing okay.”

“You don’t have to stop your life for me, Keanu,” you stated. “I know how passionate you are about acting. We have to go back to our normal routine, and that includes you, too.”

“But I have Arch to keep me busy,” he countered. “I just don’t want to take a job where I have to be away for more than a week.”

“Why?”

Licking his lips, Keanu’s eyes then dropped to the ground. If only you knew the last time he was gone for so long. What the distance did to you and him…

“It’ll be difficult if I’m away,” he spoke honestly. “It took you a while to get used to me being gone all the time.”

“Well, it’s better if I start getting used to it now than later. Ke, I promise you that I’ll be fine. I know you want to take care of me, but I can handle myself. I want things to be as normal as they once were, no matter how challenging it was before.”

Keanu flickered his eyes up to yours, noticing the pleading look you gave him, and it was something he could never say no to. With a sigh, he nodded his head despite being unsure of his own response.

“Okay. I’ll see what my agent has,” he answered, smiling to convince you that he would.

“Good,” you replied. “We have to move on with our lives whether or not I get my memories back. I don’t want us to be stuck in the past when there’s an entire future ahead.”

Keanu hummed as he watched you happily take another bite out of your scone, letting your words sink in for a minute.

Once again, you were right, but was he ready to risk it all?

Part 7

Tags: @penwieldingdreamer​ @fanficsrusz​ @toomanystoriessolittletime​ @awessomness​ @meetmeinthematinee​ @ringa-starr​ @ficsnroses​ @iworshipkeanureeves​

[penwieldingdreamer]

My best friend, naughty lover and partner for life

Summary: Pregnant and nearly alone in a new city, that’s how you found yourself after you left your cheating boyfriend standing in the rain in the city of Los Angeles. But thank god for Cindy’s aunt Laura getting you that new job.

Warning: slight swearing, angry and cheating ex-boyfriend

Words: 1149

My first story written for Keanu Reeves, this will be a multipart story starting in 2013 and moving on to now. I hope you will like it. Enjoy the first part and if you want leave a little feedback.

“I left everything for this,” you gestured to the city behind you, feeling your blood boiling, “I left it all...for you!”

The rain was pouring at this time of the year, you were shivering despite living in Los Angeles, sunny California. Your clothes soaked through, making the light material of the summery skirt and camisole stick to your body. Tommy Lance, your soon-to-be ex-boyfriend sat in his car, slowly driving beside you as you angrily walked down the road to the one place you knew would be a new constant in your life.

“It's three in the morning and it's raining, get in the fucking car.” he told you, putting his hand out of the open window. Ignoring him, you still continued on making your way to the diner Helen worked. She was your neighbor, living in the apartment across from yours and helping you whenever you were in need. Of course she too was a reason why you had a job at the same diner as her.

You had talked to her, better yet swooned about Tommy and she scolded you for it, saying he was just a player, that he would leave her when it was getting boring for him. Now you had to give her credit for her predictions.

Just this afternoon you had felt like the whole world was on your side, smiling like the sun and now the rain fit your mood, soaking you to the bone. Tears gathered in your eyes as the scene replayed again and again inside your mind. “Get your ass in the fucking car. You're pregnant!”

Tommy had gotten out of the Mustang he drove and came up toward you. His hand reached out for your arm, holding it tightly and pulling you back. You tried shaking it off, but as always he was too strong. It wasn't the first time he grabbed you, but it was never in anger or to hurt you. Finally you had enough and turned to your ex, seeing the seething look in his face.

“Why do you care?” you bellowed, stopping your angry walk. “Only a few minutes before you were fucking my friend, the one I could tell everything to. I trusted her.” Your voice broke when you finally let the salty water trail down your cheeks mixing with the rain. “I trusted you.”

Pulling the light jacket closer around your body you started again, leaving Tommy standing at the curb with a baffled look. It felt good to get it off your chest and get back at him for being such an asshole.

“You know what? I didn't even want children, so don't contact me in any way. Haley is a better fuck than you ever were.” Turning around you gave him the finger and watched as Tommy drove out of my life, hopefully to never return again.

When you finally arrived at the diner Helen looked at you in shock. Of course she was working the late shift like every day and you were thankful for it. She gave you a sign to wait and went back to the kitchen.

The middle aged woman came back with a large blanket and sat you down in a booth in the corner of the diner. “Goodness hun, where have you been? What were you doing out there in the rain?”

You tried to smile but it came out more like a grimace than the real thing. And before you could stop, the sobbing started. Helen pulled you into her arms and stroked over your hair, trying to calm you down so your breathing would return to normal again. “Oh my darling, what happened?”

“T-Tom-my” you started gulping in all the air you could get. “Y-You were ri-ight about him.”

“Oh, hush darling. That's not”

“But it is!” you interrupted her, pulling back to look at her. “He cheated on me with Haley. He told me just after I told him I was expecting his baby.” Your booming voice made the other patrons turn to you. Putting your hands over your face, the sobbing started anew.

Cindy, one of the younger girls working at the diner came over and gave you both a look, asking what happened. Helen relayed the story, giving her the short and a little more colorful version. The blonde laid her hand on your arm, pulling your own hands away from your tear stained face. “Don't do this to yourself, darling. Tommy is an idiot if he couldn't see what a great gal you are. Hopefully he'll end up with crabs.”

Laughing through your sniffles you send both Helen and Cindy a thankful smile, knowing you could count on them. “So, what am I gonna do now? With the baby on the way I don't make enough money at the bar and I'm not sure about taking a second job.”

“How far along are you?”

You smiled down at your belly, which was still flat but held a new life that grew there, your little light. “My doctor said it's still early about seven weeks, give or take a few days.”

“That sounds wonderful, but have you decided what you will do now? Are you going to keep the baby?” the blonde looked at you, her eyes full of concern, knowing things would get tight now.

Nodding your head you turned to the two women. “I will keep it, yes. But I'll have to look for another job. The wage at the diner isn't enough to keep my apartment and get the two of us fed.”

Helen leaned back in the booth and pursed her lips, obviously thinking about something. Her nose crinkled, before her eyes lit up. “I've got it!” she exclaimed with a toothy grin. “Cindy, doesn't your aunt work at Arch Motorcycle? You told me last time that they're still looking for a secretary to take over some work from her.”

The blonde perked up at that, laughing softly. “Yeah, I totally forgot about that.”

“Guys, what's got you in that mood? What's going on.” You inquired, pulling the blanket closer to your body as you felt the chill from the air condition again with the middle aged woman sitting a bit further away from you.

Cindy looked at you, putting her hands on the table. “The place my aunt Laura works at, they're still looking for a secretary. You'd have to take over finances, make sure everything is in order and the clients are happy. The two bosses are really nice and totally chill.” Helen confirmed it with a nod, putting her hand on your shoulder. “I could call my aunt tomorrow and give you the details. I mean it's worth a try, don't you think?”

Shrugging your shoulders you turned from the blonde to the brunet and back again. “I guess, yeah. Why not?”

Part 2

Taglist

@meetmeinthematinee @ladyreapermc @axshadows @a-really-bi-girl @fanficsrusz @ficsnroses @toomanystoriessolittletime @fortheloveoffanfic @pinkzsugar @lunaeminxxx​ @momorix3​ @sallyp-53​ @keanureeefs​ @baphometwolf666​ ​ @mrspeacem1nusone​

[catatonicengineers]

A Defense of Cait Sith

Plushie Princess Saga:

A Hundred Ways to Put the WRO Back Together

A Hundred Ways to Wreck Shinra HQ

Reeve’s Adventures in Babysitting and World Saving:

And Take a Stand at Shinra

While There’s Still Time

On Plushies and Oppenheimer:

A Defense of Cait Sith

~

“We knew the world would not be the same. A few people laughed, a few people cried. Most people were silent.” - J. Robert Oppenheimer

I was eight-years-old when I played Final Fantasy VII for the first time, exactly one year after its release. Like many 90’s gamers, FFVII was a turning point into the world of RPG’s from which I’ve yet to recover. Kids today will never understand the coming of age that occurred somewhere between Yoshi’s Island and grappling with the ethos of Avalanche blowing Sector 1’s reactor sky high. It’s no surprise that my 3rdgrade brain found an essence of familiarity to cling to amid the existential dread and ecoterrorism that was the greatest game ever made.

Cait Sith was the cute, cuddly party member that validated my love of cats and ignited my adoration for moogles. I would relentlessly make room for him in my party, despite his terrible combat stats, and hurl endless Phoenix Downs every time he fell.

He was quirky, he fought with a megaphone, his limit breaks were oddly sparse compared to the rest of the cast, and his home base of Gold Saucer looked like a unicorn threw up all over a casino. What’s not to love?

According to recent Reddit threads, Youtube comments, and rage bloggers, apparently a lot.

The advent of the long awaited FFVII remake rightfully caused a massive revival of the excitement first felt by long time fans of the franchise. The release date has been confirmed for March 3, 2020 – two days before my 30thbirthday. Not gonna lie; feels like the universe aligned to bless the official passing of my youth with this nostalgia bomb.

It’s with this love of all things FFVII in mind that I’d like to formally pose a defense of the game’s most hated character.

Cait Sith/Reeve, this one’s for you.

The Laughter

We first meet the lively, dancing robo-moogle and cat combo in Gold Saucer and we’re not quite sure if this strange entity should count as one party member or two. Either way, he joins your crew as the quintessential comic relief with nary a backstory in sight. That’s right; you are now the proud owner of Cait Sith. A “fortune teller” by trade, Cait Sith’s motivations remain as murky as your party’s future.

At first glance, it’s easy to pass Cait Sith off as a filler character, the cute one added for giggles. The one the writers never bothered to flesh out because, let’s face it, that moogle is mostly fluff anyway. The “most useless character” title isn’t entirely unjustified.

If this was where Cait Sith’s story ended.

I still remember the day my older brother announced that he’d read ahead in the player’s guide (this used to be a thing, kids) and discovered Cait Sith was a Shinra spy. I’m pretty sure I went through all the stages of grief before settling on denial and assuming he was playing a joke on me. Surely, my favorite slot machine loving companion couldn’t be a traitor.

Enter Reeve Tuesti, the man behind the moogle. He’s the head of Urban Development at Shinra Electric Power Company. He wears a signature blue suit to work everyday. He hates board meetings. He’s not fond of his coworkers. Like Tifa, he’s an introvert. And he’s the guy who engineered the Mako reactors.

If Hojo is Dr. Frankenstein, Reeve is Oppenheimer. The tragedy of the monsters we create is always greater when it’s a monster we loved. Where the other Shinra execs are motivated by greed, power, and a desire to play God, Reeve is the only Shinra higher up we encounter with genuine empathy and a sense of advocacy for the people. It’s easy to assume that Mako reactors would improve lives, but as Marlene so eloquently asks, “isn’t that because we were taking away from the planet’s life?”

When faced with the guilt of a design gone horribly wrong, those in authority have two choices; own the guilt or double down. And Reeve doubles down.

I’ve never been a fan of the way modern RPG’s have everything clearly spelled out and spoon fed to the gamer. The reason we don’t need further backstory for Reeve is because his character arc is already apparent if we do a bit of digging. I was surprised to learn that the common conjecture behind the exact mechanics of Cait Sith involved him being a remote controlled, autonomous but non-sentient robot. Given that assumption, it’s fair to say that Cait Sith is a worthless character who lacks emotion or consequence.

One opinion I’ve seen trending is why not simply make Reeve join the party, sans the giant stuffed animal? After all, we’d get to see how he grapples with his role in Shinra and eventual betrayal of Avalanche.

Two words; cognitive dissonance. You have to question what kind of 35-year-old executive creates a plushie cat proxy to begin with. See I’ve never thought of Reeve and Cait Sith as separate. The gritty psychological mechanics that are Reeve have always been there, plush or human. Reeve has developed an alter that’s effectively a form of escape. The assertion that Cait Sith lacks consequence isn’t false – a robot carries out its duty, incapable of harboring guilt, blame, or moral repercussion. That’s a pretty darn good way to remain detached enough to stab your party members in the back!

Cait Sith is also an outlet for everything Reeve’s repressed executive life lacks. As Cait Sith, he’s silly and carefree, though not completely unfamiliar. Glimpses of Cait Sith’s witty quips are echoed in Reeve’s mock nicknames for his colleagues – “Kyahaha” and “Gyahaha” respectively. When life is tough to take, we laugh so we don’t scream.

Plus, the idea of Reeve controlling Cait Sith in real time, much like an MMORPG avatar, is just plain hilarious. I’ve always imagined him as the kind of guy who rolls up to his 9-5 office job, pops open a spreadsheet to look busy, and boots up Cait Sith in the other tab. He’s the OG Aggretsuko, the guy making Jim Halpert faces at the camera every Shinra board meeting.

And I get you, Reeve. Really, I do.

The Tears

Cait Sith’s sacrifice was a cop out for killing off a real character. Why didn’t Reeve just die instead of the plushie?

First of all, how dare you.

Second, not all deaths need be literal.

A pervading theme throughout FFVII is the concept of identity. Are we born into an existence we have no control over or can we choose who we are day by day? It’s easy to want to be someone else, the First Class Soldier who sweeps in, keeps his promise, and saves the girl. Our reality is often less of a fairy tale and riddled with our own failures.

By the time the party reaches The Temple of the Ancients, the line where Cait Sith ends and Reeve begins is blurring. Reeve speaks more often as “himself” through the plushie and the nuances in their speech and mannerism are blending. It’s no accident that this shift happens as Reeve becomes more at ease around Avalanche, ultimately switching sides.

I’ve heard a lot of criticism on the seeming lack of motivation to Reeve’s redemption. If we examine the cognitive dissonance theory that governs his character, the switch is far less sudden.

Cait Sith’s death is necessitated by Reeve’s accountability. The innocent plushie alter isn’t working anymore. It’s not enough to keep him from recognizing the horrors he’s been complicit to. Sacrificing this part of himself is the ultimate acknowledgment of culpability. It’s arguably a more important death than if Reeve actually martyred himself. Like Cloud, he no longer needs to be “someone else” and has started down the path of doing what only he, and not Cait Sith, can; stopping Shinra.

There will be more wonderful, fluffy moogle-cat plushies, but the need to disassociate completely is gone. He’ll confront whatever comes without a crutch – or in this case a teddy bear. Reeve reminisces that the original doll was “special” and we end with Cait Sith reminding him(self) not to forget this.

The Silence

In 1953, J. Robert Oppenheimer was denied all security clearance and effectively blacklisted by the McCarthy administration for his strong opposition to nuclear warfare.

Sometimes we find ourselves in a place we never hoped or expected to be in, surrounded by people we despise, and convinced the world is going straight to heck. We can either get out of dodge or stay.

If Reeve had indeed sacrificed himself rather than Cait Sith, this would simply have been yet another escape. He stays. He works. He gets Marlene and Elmyra out of Midgar. He spies on Shinra. He finally tells Gyahaha to stick it. He goes on to head the WRO and never stops advocating for the people.

Reeve’s not a fighter. He can barely get by with a handgun in Dirge of Cerberus and Cait Sith’s megaphone is no Masamune. Despite this, he takes a big risk by being the only insider on the team. We’re pretty sure Shinra doesn’t share Reeve’s opposition to capital punishment either.

Maybe this is why I’ve always loved Cait Sith/Reeve. I’m intrigued to see if Square Enix will add any further insight into our favorite plush moogle-cat-spy, but if they don’t, that’s alright too. Cait Sith is still a pretty solid character. After my brother spoiled one of the game’s major plot twists for me, I ended up reading the player’s guide for myself. And he was right. But he was also wrong. I recall marching proudly into the living room to declare that while yes, Cait Sith was a traitor, he was also a hero.

So fight your fight. Fail and fall. Hurl some Phoenix Downs and get right back up again.

[ladyreapermc]

Fic: A Wish Your Heart Makes (Keanu x Reader) 3/3

Author's notes: cinderella AU requested by @ringa-starr​ Check it out part 1 and part 2 Thank you everyone for all the feedback and loving words on this. Hope you all enjoy this wrap up!

Word count: 2584

Warnings: a tiny bit of angst, but still so fluffy

As an employee of the hotel, you had could have all of your meals at the restaurant. Not the entire menu, of course, but enough so that you barely ever ate at your own place anymore. Especially not breakfast, that in your opinion was the time of the day the restaurant served their best meals. It was just easier to have it here before heading home after a night shift.

So as usual, you took your table a little after seven. It was still pretty empty at that time of the morning so as soon as you were seated, one of the waiters came to see you, a friendly smile on his face as he took your order.

You took out your book and managed half a page before someone dropped on the seat across from you. When you lowered your book to see, you felt your cheeks warm at the sight of a freshly showered Keanu in front of you.

“Morning, Christie,” he greeted you. His dark hair was still wet and combed back, the tips curling by his nape. His skin had a slightly flushed tone and the scent of his aftershave was wafting in your direction.

“Good morning, Mr.-Keanu,” you caught yourself, earning a wide smile from him, that made you smile too, your heart speeding up in your chest.

Your plan had been to put the entire masquerade ball behind you, forget it had even happened, but apparently, fate was very keen on making that impossible.

Keanu seemed to be everywhere you went and you were starting to see a side of him that was completely different from what the tabloids and gossip suggested. He was kind and funny and understanding that if you hadn’t been already infatuated with him after the ball, you would certainly by now.

And you know it was so stupid to fall for your boss, but it was hard not to when Keanu kept smiling at you like that, searching you out and giving you stupid nicknames.

“Sam’s already in,” you said, remembering what he had asked you yesterday. “If you still want to talk to him.”

“No need,” he grinned as he placed his order. “What I needed from him I ended finding out on my own.”

You set your book aside and watched him with expectation, your stomach suddenly heavy because you had a feeling it was about the masquerade ball.

After a moment of silence, Keanu told her everything, the gala, his mystery woman, finding her dress by chance at the laundry and discovering the woman’s room. He searched for her and she admitted everything.

“Long story short, Aubrey and I have a date tonight,” he finished, his eyes glinting with excitement as he sipped his coffee.

You wanted to scream that he found the wrong woman, that she was lying to him and had never set foot at the masquerade ball. But if you did that, how were you going to explain it? You couldn’t exactly confess everything to him, could you?

“I’m happy,” he declared, his smile taking a softer note. “I haven’t really been able to open up to anyone in a while. Maybe I’m finally ready to move on.”

“That’s good,” you managed, nearly choking on your words. “I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks… Rowling,” Keanu flashed you a teasing smile and all you felt like throwing up.

“I have to get going,” you said, standing up. “Good luck on your date tonight, Keanu.”

“Wait. You haven’t even finished…”

You didn’t stay to hear the rest. You were dangerously close to crying and you didn’t want him to see you like that. Not again.

Why did those things keep happening to you? Why couldn’t you just catch a break?

---

His heart was thundering in his chest, his palms were sweating and there was a knot in his throat. Keanu hadn’t felt like this in ages. Not even when he broke ground on his first hotel, but tonight he was a pile of nerves. He just wanted for this to go well between him and Aubrey, as well as it had gone at the party.

He tried to fix his tie again, but it stubbornly sat crooked around his neck. With a frustrated sigh, Keanu combed his fingers through his hair one last time, before grabbing his jacket and pocketing his phone. If he didn’t leave now, he would be late.

The elevator’s ride felt like it was taking forever and when it finally opened in the lobby, Keanu felt his stomach twisting into knots. He looked around, before checking his watch, but Aubrey still hadn’t come down.

“Your tie is crooked,” she said, and he looked up to see Y/N behind him.

“Never been great with bow ties.”

She snorted and gestured him to come closer and lift his chin as she undid the tie. Her nimble fingers brushing against his Adam’s apple and making him swallow hard.

“There. That’s better,” she said, taking a step away from him. “You look very handsome, Keanu.”

“Thanks.” He smiled as she held his gaze, the knots in his stomach shifting into butterflies. “Brontë.” Her lips quirked into a grin.

“You’ve used that one before.”

“There are four of them, so I still have two more.”

Her chuckle made him laugh too, his heart slowing down in a way like only familiarity and comfort could do. But before she could answer, someone cleared their throat beside them and Keanu turned to see at Aubrey. She looked stunning in blue, though he still preferred the red.

“Hey. You look amazing,” he greeted, moving to take her hand in his elbow and press a kiss on her cheek. “Shall we?”

Aubrey nodded, and Keanu took a step towards the restaurant. He looked over his shoulder at Y/N one last time, smiling at the way she mouthed good luck to him, before heading back to the front desk.

“I thought the restaurant was that way,” Aubrey gestured when Keanu took a left instead of the usual right.

“It is, but I have a surprise.”

She smiled wide at him and let him lead her across the ballroom and to the balcony where he had asked for a table to be set.

“What do you think?”

“It’s beautiful.” Aubrey kissed his cheek before taking her seat, one of the waiters pulling the chair out for her.

Keanu expected a better reaction if he was being honest. This was the balcony they had spent their first night after all. He did his best to shake his disappointment as he watched her sip her wine, nose wrinkling in distaste.

“Can I get a rosé?” she asked, snapping her fingers at the waiter. He hurried to exchange her glass, while Aubrey turned her focus back on Keanu as they lapsed in a long, awkward silence.

“So, uh, you never told me what you do,” he asked, trying to break strangeness of all.

Aubrey smiled and launched herself in a long explanation about her career as a digital influencer, her several contracts with different brands that she advertised on her Instagram and YouTube channel. Everything she described felt so jarringly opposed to what Keanu had thought he had seen when they first met that he didn’t know what to think. Could he have been that wrong?

“…and that was how I got a contract with Dior at Paris Fashion Week, last year.” she completed with a smug grin, pulling Keanu back from his musings.

“I’m sorry, did you say Paris?” he asked, and Aubrey just nodded, distractedly checking her phone as the waiter came over with the menus.

“I think I’m going with the seabass a provençal,” Aubrey said, glancing up at Keanu when he chuckled humorlessly.

“It was never you, was it?” he asked, partly disappointed, partly relieved. “The other night.” Aubrey froze, surprise shining in her eyes. “Why did you lie?”

“Keanu Reeves shows up at your door thinking you two hooked up at a party? Who would be crazy enough to say no to that?”

There was a derisive tone in her voice and that’s what sealed the deal. Keanu stood up, setting his napkin on the table.

­“Have a good night, Aubrey.”

He didn’t wait for her protest or reply. Keanu just needed to get out of there, forget this entire mess had happened to begin with. Preferably over some whiskey and Lawrence’s company.

Keanu headed straight for his friend’s office, pausing outside the door as he heard muffled voices arguing. One male, two females. Before he could reach for the handle, the door was pushed open and Y/N ran straight onto his chest.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, noticing the angsted expression in her face.

Her eyes went wide when she recognized him and she pulled back from his embrace, her eyes welling up. Keanu could see she was fighting tears as she shook her head and ran off.

Keanu watched her go in confusion, before stepping inside the room to find Lawrence sitting behind his desk, looking tired and disappointed and Adrianne with a smug smirk on her lips.

“What just happened? Why was she crying?”

“I had to let her go,” Lawrence replied with a sigh. “Weren’t supposed to be on a date?”

“She wasn’t the one,” Keanu said with a frown, noticing the cashmere scarf Lawrence was holding. His scarf. “Where did you get that?”

Lawrence looked at the garment and sighed again.

“It was found in her bag,” Adrianne declared almost preening and Keanu just knew she had gone through Y/N’s things to find it. “It’s probably from one of the guests and she stole it. I’ve always known she was a bad fit for this hotel.”

“It’s mine,” Keanu said, taking the scarf, his heart hitting his throat as the puzzle was finally complete.

It was there all along, staring him in the face. No wonder he felt such a connection to her from the second they met. How he felt so comfortable with her without knowing why. How the banter and conversation with her felt so natural to him like he already knew her. It was her. She was the one.

“She didn’t steal this. I gave it to her.”

---

You were still battling your tears when you got home after clearing your locker. This was really it. You had lost everything you ever cared about in only four months.

You lost your family, you lost your writing, you lost your job, you lost your friends. You even lost Keanu. Not that you ever had him, in the first place, but your heart didn’t seem to care with such details. It just hurt.

You dropped your backpack by the door, moving to the couch and curling into a fetal. You knew you should probably start to make a plan, figure out what you were gonna do from now on, but your brain seemed unable to focus enough for you to gather your thoughts. All you managed was to relive everything that had happened in the last hour.

The knock on your door made you jump startled, finally breaking through your depressed musings. You knew it was probably Trina, having learned of what happened. Or maybe Sam. Part of you wanted to ignore it. Seeing them would make everything worse.

But another part of you knew you needed someone tonight, otherwise, you’d drive yourself crazy thinking on what-ifs or dwelling on everything. So you dragged yourself from the couch and pulled the door open, coming face to face with Keanu.

“Wha…?” it was all you managed before Keanu sidestepped you and moved into the apartment.

“It was you. At the ball. It was you.” It wasn’t a question and panic squeezed your lungs, making you unable to talk. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was afraid,” you said, hugging yourself as you looked away from him. “I borrowed a dress from a guest of the hotel without their knowledge, crashed a party during my work shift... Lawrence was right in firing me.”

“I don’t care about any of that!” Keanu exclaimed. “I can’t believe you watched me go out with another woman, thinking it was you.” A hint of anger bled into his tone. “And you just stood there and wished me good luck.”

“What was I supposed to do?” you shouted back, fear shifting into anger. “Just come around and say: hey, I know you’re my boss, but we shared the best kiss of my life the other night and I think I might be in love with you?”

“What did you say?” Keanu asked and you could see the shock in his eyes.

“Nothing. Forget it.”

You shook her head, turning away from him. What the hell were you thinking? Did you really blurt that out?

“Say it again,” Keanu asked, hand resting on your arm, warm and comforting as he slowly made you turn around again to face him. “Please.”

He was towering over you and your heart thundered against your chest as you looked up at him. There it was it again, the intense gaze you had seen at the ball, but there was also hope and hesitation.

“I think I’m in love with you,” you whispered.

Keanu smiled, hand moving from your arm to wrap around your back and pull you flush against his body as his lips met yours.

There weren’t any fireworks or sparks or any of the other clichés. There was instead a certain sense of belonging. Like this was something you were supposed to be doing all along. It felt almost like coming home.

“I’m in love with you too,” Keanu whispered against your lips as the two of your part, forehead resting against yours.

“Really?” You smiled at him, arms coming around his neck.

“Really.” Keanu smiled too before catching your lips in a new kiss.

---

Your throat felt dry and a little sore as you finished reading the manuscript and as soon as the words ‘the end’ passed your lips, a cool glass of lemonade appeared in front of you as Keanu brushed a kiss against the top of your head.

“So what do you think?” you asked, after taking a long sip of the drink and looking up at him from where you laid resting against his chest, legs stretched over the couch.

“I love it,” he said with a big grin. “Though I don’t remember being that clueless.”

“Honey, please!” you snorted. “You went on a date with the wrong girl.”

“You could’ve stopped me!” he complained with a pout that never failed to make you laugh and kiss him.

“It doesn’t matter now, does it?” you asked settling the glass and your manuscript on the coffee table, before climbing on his lap. “It worked out in the end.”

“Yeah, it did,” Keanu smiled softly and kissed the tip of your nose. “It’s a great book, babe. And it deserves to be published.”

You grinned at him before kissing him, his lips parting under yours almost immediately, welcoming you in.

“You know what that means, right?” you said as you broke away from the kiss. “I’ll be a published author so you’re gonna have to find other nicknames for me.”

“You’re right,” Keanu said with a small frown, that quickly broke into a smile as he took your hand and brought it to his lips, kissing over the golden band around your ring finger. “How does Mrs. Reeves, sound?”

“It sounds really, really good.”

xxx

Taglist (give me a shout if you want to added.)

@poisonedjoinery @ringa-starr @curly-minnie @i-cant-remember-my-old-login

@caryled @beyond-antares @kathorax @krazycags01 @meetmeinthematinee

@red-pill-blue-pill @baphometwolf666 @soarocks @imagine-the-fanfics @moonlit-raven-haven @cumberbatchbaps @coolbreezeinkeanureeves

[fortheloveoffanfic]

Mistakes and Regrets

Keanu Reeves x Reader.

How was one supposed to get over their ex if your break was plastered all over the media? Well, the truth was, you didn’t. Both Keanu and Y/n had learned that. They had come together after  a beautiful friendship had turned into something more following an innocent evening of cocktails at their favorite restaurant in the city. They had approached a romantic relations with extreme caution but eventually when the press got suspicious they no longer saw the point of hiding.

“Why should I have to hide how I feel about you?” He had asked one night, laying in bed, with Y/n sprawled out on top of him. He had looked so perfect, dim light from the fire place casting a glow on his gorgeous face. 

“Do you really want to do this?” Y/n raised herself off him, and Keanu brushed a strand of hair from her face, then let his hands gently skim across her skin under the sheets.

“I do. I want everything with you Y/n.” Maybe those were the words that had frightened her. The fact that they were falling in love and every relationship in her past had gone up in smoke. She had never been good at this. But maybe, quite possibly, Y/n hoped that she could be this time. “What do you say? One word and its done.”

Her breath shuddered when she responded, but somewhere, deep down she meant it. She had to, else the thought would have never crossed her mind. “Lets do it.” He smiled widely urging her downwards so their lips would meet in a kiss, fire and passion true. 

About a month later, Y/n and Keanu had made their red carpet debut as a couple at a movie premiere. With his arm secured around her waist, they strolled along the carpet, stopping occasionally to take pictures for their adoring public. Photographers begged for more, and though reluctant at first, they give in. Keanu bent and Y/n leaned into him cupping his face. Their first public kiss.

After that night, they weren’t afraid to be seen in public. Granted, they weren’t your run of the mill ‘PDA couple’, they had preferred to keep things simple and low key, the chemistry between them was still palpable from a mile away. 

Of course, when one of Hollywood’s rising stars starts dating one of the most notable names in the industry, people will talk, things will be written and assumptions would be made. Was she dating him in attempt to gain more media coverage for herself? Was he having a mid life crisis? None of it mattered to either of them though. They were happy, in love. Everything was perfect. Until the night when it all came crashing down. Or possibly, ‘crashing down’ would have been to much of a sudden description. Maybe it would be more fitting to describe that evening as the one where things came to a halt after slowing down for a while.

“Y/n?” Keanu called slowly walking through her house. Most of the lights were turned off, but there was light filtering from the back porch into the living room. “Y/n?” Finally, he walked through the open screen door, over to where she stood at the railing, looking at the rolling hills in the distance. 

She didn’t speak until he was standing next to her. For some reason, he had left some space between them. It matched the distance that had recently graced their relationship. Neither of them was sure who introduced it at first, be no one had made a move to fix things. “Do you still love me?” She questioned, her voice quiet and sad. 

I do, he wanted to say. It was true, but it would make her stay, and at this point he had decided that would have been the worst thing for her. So instead, he lied, “I....” Well, he tried to. 

Y/n’s breath caught, and she hastily swiped at her eyes, “I thought so.” 

It broke Keanu’s heart to see her like this, “What about you?” 

“What about me?” She asked, swallowing tightly, avoiding what was coming next.

“Do you still love me?” He asked holding his breath for her answer.

His chest tightened, and tears slipped down her cheeks, when she said, “Does it matter? What are we doing?” Y/n had long given up on avoiding what felt like the inevitable, “This isn’t working any more is it? We can’t keep pretending. I can’t...” Her voice trailed off as she chocked a sob.

After a long silence, Keanu spoke again, stuffing his hands in his pockets to restrain himself from touching her, “I’ve been thinking, a lot. You should be with someone your age. Someone who you can experience new things with.”

Y/n nodded, her chest aching. Did he really feel this way? After they had spent so long saying that age was just a number. “And you need someone who knows how to love you. And I don’t think I’ve been doing that lately. I think, that maybe, I led you on.” Y/n fought to contain her sobs. She had wanted to fix things tonight. Y/n knew that out of fear, she had pushed him away, scared of completely falling for him. But the from minute that she had realized how irrational her fear was, Y/n had wanted to mend things. Though if that was how he felt then she didn’t see the point, “We shouldn’t do this anymore. I’m sorry.” 

That night had been almost six months ago and it had been one that Keanu regretted. Often, he found himself wondering if she did too. It didn’t really look like she did, every time he caught a glimpse of her on a headline, he’d dive right in. And every time, another piece of his hope chipped away. There were stories about her everywhere. About a trip she took to Cancun with friends. A new project that she was working on in some exotic, European location. Being spotted at a charity gala with a date. It hurt to think that she was dating someone else, even if that was what he had told her to do.

Y/n sat in her hotel room in London staring at the television. There he was again, smiling for the cameras at his premiere, looking happy. And of course, because apparently no one could let it go, the presenter mentioned their ‘recent’ break up. Y/n’s shoulder’s slumped when he simply brushed off the mention of her. Ouch. She had spent the past few months missing him yet it didn’t seem like he remotely missed her. 

From her spot on the bed, she glanced up at the garment bag hanging on the hook on the bathroom door, wondering if she was making another mistake.

From the minute she stepped out of the black, heavily tinted SUV, lights flashed from all directions. Y/n walked along the designated carpeted path, avoiding the jumble of questions and comments being hurled at her. Who was she wearing? Why was she in London? Was she seeing someone new? Did her appearance tonight mean that she had reconciled with Keanu?

The truth was that she did not even know if that was possible. He didn’t even seem like he missed her, but when tickets for the London premiere of his new movie had somehow ended up with her agent, Y/n found herself unable to decline. She wanted to see him, talk to him and tell him how everything she had said that night had been a lie. Y/n had no idea if he felt the same, after all, he had told her he couldn't be with her, but she had to try. Take a chance, even if it might break her heart.

Keanu had heard that she was here and had wanted to talk to her all night, but between giving numerous interviews and then the screening of the movie, he had not gotten the chance. However, now that it was all over and everyone had scattered for the after party, he was free to do whatever he pleased.

Wandering around the packed room, he searched for Y/n, though as it turned out, she found him first. For a minute, he stopped abruptly and she did too. She looked even better than he remembered, if it were even possible. The flecks of glitter in her navy blue dress danced on low lighting and the dangerous slit along her left side was alluring. 

“Hi,” Y/n spoke softly, the word almost getting lost underneath the music and chatter.

“Hey.” A ghost of a smile threatened to up turn his lips when he asked, “Can we talk?” And Y/n agreed, letting him lead her out into the deserted hallway.

“How have you been?” She asked nervously.

“I’ve been better.” Like when I was with you. Words left unsaid hung in the air, “You?”

Y/n shrugged, wringing her hands awkwardly, “I guess I could say the same.” After that, a long pregnant pause followed before they both tried to speak up at once. “ You go first,” Y/n insisted.

“I just....” How was he even supposed to say this? “I’m sorry Y/n.” Keanu sighed heavily, the events of that night coming back to him in a rush. The tightness in his throat as he told her that she should be with someone else, the sound of her chocked sobs as she told him that she couldn’t love him, the gnawing ache of a mutual break up that should have never happened. “What I said that night, it came from fear. Not just a man who was scared to lose you, but one who thought that losing you was inevitable. You were so young, and you still are, I.....” He ran anxious fingers through his hair in a throw away attempt to not grab her hands, “I thought that you were beginning to regret us, and I couldn’t let you stay with me, because I couldn’t stand the thought of being a regret to you, someone who held you back from living out your best years because he had already lived.” Keanu sighed, racking his brain for the right words, “But now that you’re gone, I’m selfish enough to want you back, even if you’re young and you might hate me for holding you back, I’m selfish enough to live with your hate twenty years from now if it means I can have your love today.” His eyes shone with tears, pleading with her to take him back.

Y/n’s breath caught and her mouth moved, no words escaping the red stained lips that he missed feeling against his. For a minute he thought she was going to tell him that she could never love him and already, he could feel the pain of heartbreak being renewed. But when she spoke, he knew that all hope wasn’t lost, “Keanu,” She breathed his name, relieved, “I could never regret loving you. I was so stupid and frightened of what we were becoming, and of what we were losing. We had been so distant from each other and I knew that I was falling in deeper than I ever had and at first I was scared and I did what was familiar, started pushing you away. And when you told me that I should start seeing someone else, I had wanted to tell you that I could never be with someone else cause, well, you’ve ruined everyone else for me.” Y/n sniffled, “But my ego got in the way and I made the biggest mistake of my life. I let you go, let you think that I couldn’t love you when all I could ever feel for you is love.” Being more bold than he had been, Y/n took Keanu’s hands, “I regret everything that happened that night and I regret that its taken us this long to get here, but I could never, and I will never, regret my feelings for you, because the truth is, the best years of my life are just going to be years unless I spend them with you.” Y/n sniffled again, glancing at their shoes, inches apart from each other, then looked back up, meeting his gaze, remembering all the reasons she feel in love with him in the first place, “So, if you really meant what you just said, I’d like to give this, give us, another try.”

Keanu smiled, and let his hands travel from her loose grip to around her waist, “Yeah? You’re sure?” He asked, stepping forward so they were toe to toe.

“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life.” Y/n wound her arms around his neck, tangling her fingers in the softness of his dark hair, reaching up to kiss him, deeper than they had ever kissed before. 

As they continued, locked in each other’s embrace, they to could vaguely hear the shuttering and clicks of cameras in the distance, the paparazzi ready to send out unofficial evidence of their reunion, but neither of them cared, because it didn’t matter. They had made a mistake and had months worth of lost time to make up for, “Do you wanna go back to my hotel room?” Y/n asked against his lips.

Keanu looked at her with familiar love and passion burning in his eyes, “I’d love to.” He kissed her one last time, before they made a not so discreet escape back to the hotel. 

[weasley-gal]

Cindy’s Top Ten Movies of 2019!

Ahhh...2019. In the interest of building suspense, I could be all cagey about this countdown, but let's face it: For me, 2019 was the Year of Rocketman. As lousy as the real-world year was, it was salvaged by Rocketman. Someone suggested in jest (maybe?) that Rocketman should be numbers one through ten on my year-end list, and that would be fair enough; HOWEVER...I did like some other movies this year, so I'm gonna give you--yes YOU, dear reader(s)--ten of my favorites. Just know in your hearts that the other nine fall way behind number one. Way, WAY behind.

The usual disclaimers:

A movie's position on my year-end list does not necessarily reflect its original Weasley score. Some films age well, bear up, and even improve under repeat viewings. Some...well...some do not. Also, I live in a rinky-dink town, so great movies like JoJo Rabbit and 1917--pictures that almost certainly would have found spots here or gotten very close--have not made themselves available to me yet. This is disappointing, but unsurprising. I'd hung my entire holiday break on the prospect of seeing 1917, only to discover on Christmas Day that its Christmas opening was limited release, and I have to wait until January 10th. Humbug. Finally, I think three or four of these movies already made Variety's "worst of" list for 2019, so kindly do not be too shocked when I diverge from The Serious Critics (TM).  

Without further ado, presenting my top ten films of 2019:

TEN

"The most important qualification for any leader is not wanting to be leader."

THE TWO POPES

2019 threw me a nice surprise on its way out the celestial door, with the Netflix original The Two Popes. It's a deliberate, thoughtful, and timely film carried by a pair of the year's most exquisite performances: Jonathan Pryce as Pope Francis and Anthony Hopkins as Pope Benedict XVI. While the subject matter is weighty, this movie is an absolute delight.

NINE

"I'm glad I'm a revelation and not a disappointment."

DOWNTON ABBEY

This big-screen adaptation of the popular television series Downton Abbey, is, in fact, something of a revelation. A totally new story in the familiar and much-loved setting, with just the right amount of fan service, it is a joyful exercise that hits nearly every note perfectly. Making its case for the big screen are breathtaking costumes and production design...and Mr. Barrow finally seeing a bit of happiness doesn't hurt, either.

EIGHT

"We're gonna bury Ferrari at Le Mans."

FORD V FERRARI

At a glance, Ford v Ferrari might seem like a film appealing exclusively to car enthusiasts; however, that assumption does a great disservice to both the film and the viewer. Ford v Ferrari is an inspiring story about people. It's a nail-biter from start to finish, it has heart to spare, and it's fronted by great turns from Matt Damon and Christian Bale. Beautifully filmed race action makes this one to see on the biggest screen you can find.

SEVEN

"It always fits...eventually."

SPIDER-MAN: INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE

Technically, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse is a last-year movie, but for me it's a this-year movie, and--despite its being the very first film I saw way back in January, 2019--it's far too great to leave off my best-of list. A Marvel property in the hands of Sony, Spider-Verse is smart, funny, touching, and better than the entire Avengers catalog combined.  

SIX

"This is a twisted web, and we are not finished untangling it, not yet."

KNIVES OUT

Knives Out is a great piece of original cinema crafted from artful twists, clever humor, and terrific performances, layered with a gorgeous Gothic setting and an ominous score. Written and directed by Rian Johnson, this perfect murder mystery is a huge creative and financial win for the cinema, and I recommend it without hesitation or qualification.

FIVE

"This is the worst...and best...and most terrible...excellent thing that's ever happened to me!"

THE KID WHO WOULD BE KING

Hands up if you missed the Kid Who Would Be King at your local cinema? Yeah, I see you, ALL of you. The good news is that one of the year's most wonderful pictures is now available for streaming and download, and you shouldn't make the same mistake twice. The Kid Who Would Be King is a charming movie, great fun for people of all ages. Truly one of the year's best.

FOUR

"Si vis pacem, para bellum."

JOHN WICK: CHAPTER 3 — PARABELLUM

The John Wick franchise has become quite the phenomenon, and deservedly so. Continually upping the action ante in Fast-and-Furious-like fashion, these movies are so much more than just your garden-variety shoot 'em ups and beat 'em ups. John Wick is the role Keanu Reeves was born to play, and Parabellum raises the stakes for Wick while doubling down on masterful fight choreography and stunning cinematography. Here's to many more adventures for John Wick!

THREE

"Bruce is the direct line to all that's true in this world!"

BLINDED BY THE LIGHT

Blinded by the Light is another terrific picture that didn't exactly set the box office on fire. Inspired by the true story of one Springsteen superfan, and built on the Boss's epic catalog, it's a hopeful tale about overcoming prejudice and the limitations set for us by ourselves and by others, one of the year's most inspiring movies.

TWO

"Tell the truth to everyone, whenever you can."

YESTERDAY

Yesterday is yet another of 2019's under-appreciated gems, a beautiful, unique movie fashioned around the timeless music of the Beatles. Himesh Patel is a delight in the lead, and--while the premise requires suspension of disbelief--Yesterday is a charming picture that captivates with its "what ifs?" as well as its iconic soundtrack and enchanting cast.

ONE

"You were never ordinary."

ROCKETMAN

My number one movie of the year, and of the decade, was set on May 31st, when I saw Rocketman for the first time. I saw the movie at least twice a week as long as it was at my local cinema. I've watched at least part of it every day since it became available for home viewing. Outside of a week or so around each of the wonderful concerts I saw this summer, I've listened to nothing but the Rocketman soundtrack since the end of May. My phone and all my desktops have Rocketman wallpapers. I've joked (hmm?) that I only speak Rocketman now. The truth is, I'm not interested in speaking anything else. Pre-Rocketman, it had been a decade since a new movie made its way into my all-time top ten. Then there was Rocketman. Pre-Rocketman, my favorite acting performance hadn't changed since 1993. Then there was Taron Egerton's astonishing turn as Elton John. Pre-Rocketman, I was finding reasons to stay away from the movies. Then there was Dexter Fletcher showing us the beauty of real imagination. Rocketman is more than just a well-crafted film that reflects on an iconic artist's inspiring life. It is a film that uses Elton John's art to tell his story in fantastic, creative fashion. It is a film that uses exquisite detail in its styling and costumes to further its vision. It is a film that draws something sparkling and new out of a classic discography. It is a film that is not bound by dull, linear timelines or small minds. It is a film that surrounds a performance for the ages with others that bear it up. It is a film that shows, however dark the times, you will find the light. In doing all these things, it is a film that is saving lives. Rocketman is a film that is, in every way, magnificent. Thank you, Dexter Fletcher and company, for giving us this beautiful movie. Whatever the critics say and whoever wins the prizes as Awards Season bears down upon us, nobody has done anything more valuable this cinema year.

A few Honorable (and Dis-Honorable) Mentions:

While Taron Egerton deserves all the awards, all the time, for his work in Rocketman, there were some other performances this year that also gave me life:

Jamie Bell (Rocketman): Without Bell's Bernie Taupin as his stalwart cornerstone, Egerton's Elton could not have flown. It's a lovely, understated performance that has been grossly underappreciated.

Tom Holland (Marvel Cinematic Universe): Holland is a real gem, a standout who consistently steals the show from bigger names who get weightier work in the MCU. No matter how good, bad, or painfully bloated the movie, Holland is an absolute delight.

Renee Zellweger (Judy): Who knew it was even possible for me to stop hating Renee Zellweger? Well played, 2019.

Rebecca Ferguson (The Kid Who Would Be King/Doctor Sleep): There was little I enjoyed more this year than watching Ferguson chew her way through this pair of pictures. Oh, and if I start walking around wearing a hat, don't ask, m-kay?

Chris Evans (Knives Out): God, I love seeing Chris Evans do *anything* besides Captain America. Bonus points if he gets to be funny. He's really funny, despite his obscenely gorgeous mug.

John Boyega/Oscar Isaac (Star Wars: Episode IX — The Rise of Skywalker): These two, individually and together, draw joy out of what's otherwise a fairly mundane exercise. If Finn and Poe somehow jumped to another saga in the Star Wars universe, I wouldn't complain.

The Cast of Jumanji: The Next Level: Top to bottom, a perfectly cast film, and a lesson in how the right actors can elevate any property.

As a matter of interest, if you watch the Irishman and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood back to back, you can effectively calculate how many hours you'll wish you had back when you're on your deathbed.

I would like a word with Gary Oldman's and Sebastian Stan's agents, please.

Cats: Make. It. Stop. Please, just...make it stop.

As this most challenging year winds to a close, I wanted to offer a sincere thank you to everyone who takes the time to read my reviews, and especially those who engage on any of our various platforms. Special thanks to Daniel for allowing me to be a part of his great page, and for tolerating my unceasing randomness. (Hotel Transylvania 4 in 2021, my friend!) I take no one's support for granted, and I’m ever grateful for you all. I wish our readers many blessings as this festive season comes to a close and we roll into 2020. See you at the movies!

[jeanjauthor]

I like promoting artists and art as well as the writing stuff...and this is awesome. Flat-out awesome.

The people who put this movie together are artists.  They are art historians (yes, comic books have/need art historians!) and art physicists (you try keeping all those buildings in perspectives at different angles!), and art fans (not fanboys, that’s a perjurative these days) who genuinely care about trying to translate the feel of comic books into an animation style.

I’ve told y’all before that books and movies are different. You can do things in a novel that you cannot do in a movie.  You can do things in a movie that you cannot do in a novel.  But so are comic books.  They’re not novels. They’re not movies. They’re not static art--yes, I know the art just sits there on the page and doesn’t move, but the story inside the comic book, or the graphic novel, etc, etc, that is not static.

Everything you see being done in the clip was a deliberate choice made to evoke a specific experience and/or feeling in the viewer.

I’m thrilled they won the Best Animated Movie Oscar, and I really do think this movie will stand the test of time through the ages for its outstanding animation.

Of course, you can take that with a pinch of salt, because I feel Tron (the original) is still an outstanding example of computer animation...but then I remember the earliest days of computer images, so that’s my benchmark, and for its time, Tron was frikkin’ groundbreaking, and we wouldn’t have Into the Spider-Verse, or Frozen, or Aladdin or Jurassic Park or the Transformers movies--say what you will about any of these, but you’d be lying if you don’t admit Tron paved the way--not because it was the first movie to use computer-generated images (it wasn’t), but because it was the first big movie to popularize it, wowing the audiences of the day.

But honestly, it isn’t the best films that should be lauded for how they stand the test of time, but the first of the best films. Because they paved the way for better things to come.  If you look back at Star Wars (ep IV, A New Hope), it, um...it’s a 1970s film. I love it, and it was frikkin’ groundbreaking in so many ways...but the latest ones do have the higher production quality, if you tried to compare it against them.

However, if you compare it against its contemporaries, it’s no wonder it captured audiences worldwide (and spawned a lot of mediocre to downright craptastic imitators, before finally getting better stuff out there).  It blew a lot of movies right out of the water with how imaginative and creative it was.  Just like Tron did, and--arguably--just like Christopher Reeves’ Superman rewrote the book on superhero movies...even if they really didn’t get going again on that until over 20 years later when the tech to do superhero-y things on screen in a way that audiences could believe started to come true, via Iron Man, kicking off the MCU. (It was because of films like Tron and the Star Wars & Jurassic Park franchises, etc, etc, etc, that all of this became possible.)

And yes, the original Jurassic Park blew everyone out of the water with its CGI dinosaurs, too.  That’s what groundbreaking films do.  I remember hearing the “whooaah!!”s from the audience when we all first saw, along with the main characters in the Jeep, all those brontosaurs, stegosaurues, etc, in the pasture/grasslands. (Do not assume I know perfectly what they were called, I’m talking about the audience reaction, not the nitpicky details of which dinosaurs were in the movie.)  I looked quickly to either side and saw dozens of dropped jaws just like mine.  ...The latest movie in that franchise blows the first one out of the water, but there had to be a first one.

Into the Spider-Verse is one of those films.  It’s blowing everything out of the water.  And I do honestly hope we can look back on it and have the luxury of being able to roll our eyes...but I fear it’s going to be more like Tron and Superman than Star Wars or Jurassic Park.  That it might take decades to get anything close to this again...unless we support movies like this.  Unless we support artists, unless we support writers, unless we support...with money...studio producers, executives, etc...well, they love money.  So they’re going to try more of the things that they think people will continue to buy.

It’s worked for the Marvel Cinematic Universe, after all.

...And yes, we were all feeling super bummed at the end of Infinity War.  But you know what?

We were all feeilng bummed at the end of Empire Strikes Back too, back in the mid 1980s.  We just didn’t have social media (outside of chatting & panels at conventions, and covertly distributed fan’zines, the pre-internet version of fanfic archives) to share and find healing in in our mutual defeated-in-the-middle-of-the-trilogy-syndrome/misery.

The Lord of the Rings had something of this, as did The Hobbit...but those stories we already knew weren’t always happy stories.  The books have been out so long that all the tropes are heavily embedded in our cultural mythos, even if only periphrally (since actually not all that many people have managed to wade through the books; Tolkienn’s writing isn’t exactly reader-friendly to the 21st century audience). 

But things like Star Wars and the Marvel Cinematic Universe, which stated from the onset it wouldn’t be following any of the comic book plots exactly?  We’re venturing into the parts of the maps that say “here be dragons” and we aren’t talking Smaug.  He’s a known dragon.  We’re talking dragons we haven’t even met yet. (How to Train Your Dragon was another groundbreaking film in how it treated dragons, btw.)

So...long story short:  Artists, do what you gotta do.  Do what you want to do, too.  And practice. Like, LOTS.  Because they employed 177 animators at one point on the Spider-Verse film, as opposed to just 27 for Toy Story (another ground-breaker, fully animated full-length feature film in 3D computer graphics animation). 

One day, some of you are going to create something groundbreaking, either solo (think Matt Groening and The Simpsons, and yes, it was groundbreaking when it first aired, because it wasn’t The Flintstones...which was groundbreaking all on its own, but decades between them, like Superman versus Iron Man), or in a massive group, like what Into the Spider-Verse needed.

But don’t think those of you who don’t create something groundbreaking aren’t doing worthwhile work, either.  There were a lot of animation-inclusive films that were awesome, great, inspiring, intriguing, frustrating, aaaalmost made it, etc, in between the groundbreaking ones and the outstanding ones. Who Framed Roger Rabbit broke trail for Space Jam, which while not exactly highbrow cinema was still highly popular, for example.

The point is that usually people also enjoy the stuff that follows, even when it isn’t groundbreaking.  The groundbreaking stuff gets them to search for other, similar stuff...and similar stuff to that, and on and on.  And somewhere in there, they’ll find you.

And for that viewer, that reader, that audience?  You just might be groundbreaking on a personal level to them.

Take the creator of the webcomic Love & Capes.  Superhero fiction, yup.  Cartoonish “easily drawn” style, yep. Romance in the storyline, sure.  But this was a comic book storyline that followed the romance far more than the superhero stuff.  There are others out there I’m sure...but it was groundbreaking to me.  (The archives are complete, and the link to the first page can be found here: http://loveandcapes.com/comic/love-and-capes-strip-1/ ...I do recommend it, because it pokes fun at its own genre’s tropes, and yet it also flips several tropes all throughout the overall storyline.)

Artists, you are part of a long, wonderful, glorious tradition.  In fact, as far as we know, you’re literally older than writing; you were telling stories long before we had official written languages.  And you’re part of a tradition that includes animation masterpieces like Spider-Verse.

Take a few moments to take pride in that fact.  Even if you’re only on day 2 of learning how to draw...you’ve earned it.

[templeofgeek]

Josh LaCount is an actor, director, singer, songwriter and all around fanboy! He is an upcoming geek that you should absolutely keep your eye on! Best known for his roles in Trickster (2018), Vinyl (2016) and Gotham (2014). Constantly on the road and making things happen, he took a step back today to talk to us about how fandom influences his work and his life, as well what he hopes to accomplish!

For our readers who are not yet familiar with you, tell us a little bit about yourself. Hello! Well I’m just a guy who loves everything music, film and TV related. I started out when I was young, playing music, writing and performing my songs all over until that eventually helped open the door for me to get into another one of my passions – acting and film making.

How did your adventure towards working in the world of acting and singing begin?  Long story short, I started playing guitar around age 15. In the back of my head I always knew that one day I would get into acting and creating films, I just didn’t know when that time would be. I was really focused on music. My parents were always musical and always loved movies, I guess you could say that I got it from them. After living and performing in Nashville, TN for a while, I finally took the leap to NYC. I remember answering an ad online for featured extras in Men In Black 3. I didn’t think about it too much after I submitted and I ended up getting the call. I spent some time on that set and was in a few scenes with Will Smith, Josh Brolin, Jemaine Clement and Bill Hader. It rocked my world. I watched those guys act and it ignited something inside of me that said, “That is what I want to do with the rest of my life.” Ever since then it has been a non stop passion that I’ve been obsessed with. I love it. Over the years I started learning more about the industry, I started auditioning, started acting and eventually started writing screenplays as well. One thing led to another and I soon found myself directing films and creating roles for myself to play.

  You are a fan of superheroes TV shows and films. On Fox’s TV Series, Gotham, you played a member of Penguin’s gang. What is that like for you being able to play an actual character from the DC universe? I LOVE anything superhero. Heck, I love anything that just gives you the opportunity to escape and imagine a world like the ones we read about in the comics or see on the big screen. Gotham was an amazing experience and one that I will never forget. It started as an extra role and I remember getting called back onto set that day to sit across from Penguin and continue acting opposite him so that they could get his close ups. Later they asked me to come back for another episode, when I went to get my outfit from wardrobe that I had worn previously, on the front of my changing room it read, “Clash Gang Leader.” I asked, “Is that who I am?” they told me “Yep!” I couldn’t stop smiling that whole day. I’ve always been a HUGE batman fan and a fan of comic book characters in general, so that was an experience that changed my life not only because of my love for DC but also getting to meet and work with everyone there. They were honestly the kindest people and they changed my life in more ways than they will ever know.

Do you ever find it challenging to be both a fan and a professional in fandom? I will always be a fan no matter where my career takes me.

You are a big fan of Doctor Who. You even have a Doctor Who tattoo. What is it about Doctor who that you love so much? Oh my, I could talk for hours on this one. Let’s see. I love The Doctor for many, many reasons. Of course I love the fun Sci-Fi element of the show, but it’s really about the heart of it. I see The Doctor as someone who loves people. The Doctor is someone who makes mistakes, yet always ends up doing the right thing. He has empathy for others and also isn’t afraid to be himself. I feel like He needs his companions just as much as they need Him. There is so much to relate to, not just in The Doctor but also in the companions. So my main reason for loving Doctor Who is the heart. The heart behind the show, the meaning and His love for others. When I look at the tattoo on my arm, it reminds me of all of those things and I think those are all good things to be reminded about.

You cosplay the 11th Doctor and you are a convention enthusiast, what is it that attracts you to cosplay and conventions? The 11th Doctor was my very first cosplay and I had so much fun doing that. We all have “Our Doctor” and though I love them all, there was just something about 11 that gets me every time. Even now when I think about it I get a bit emotional. I know, I know, I’m a sap. I can’t help it. Matt Smith inspired me as an actor, 11 inspired me to step out in the face of fear, and my friends who I met because of Doctor Who inspired me to try cosplay. The people, the atmosphere, it’s unlike any other. I don’t think I had ever been to a convention like that before then, I was wide-eyed in wonder. The people, the time they put towards their craft, the dedication, the passion, the fun! It’s just something I hope I get to experience more of.

The casting announcement for Burden! You are acting and directing. Can you tell us what to expect. “Burden” is a project that I am head over heels excited about! It’s a Mystery, Drama, Thriller set in a science fiction world. Although I have written and directed films that I’ve acted in before, this one will be kicking it up a notch. I’ve been lucky enough to assemble an amazing cast, crew and team and I am so thankful for that. I don’t want to give too much away, but It’s about a man trying to save himself and his wife after they have been captured by an unknown kidnapper. But there is more to the situation and their kidnapper than meets the eye. For now, I’ll just leave it at that. It’s going to push me as an actor and a director to places that I’ve never been before and I am beyond excited to get started. We are about to start principal photography soon and my goal is for this to be cinematic visually and to tell a story that leaves the viewer thinking long after it’s over.

What inspired you to want to direct? When I see guys like Sly Stallone, Matt Damon, Ben Affleck, Taika Waititi etc. – they really inspire me. They write, direct, act, produce and so on. It has always been such an inspiration to see them and to see the movies they’ve made. There is something about being able to see a character, a place, and a story in your head, putting it down on paper and then making it come alive on the screen that just captivates me. I love it.

Of all the characters that you have portrayed, are there any that you are most proud of? There are actually roles that I’ve played that I was only able to play for the audition because I never got the part in the actual film. But honestly, it was some of the most fun I’ve ever had acting. I hope to be able to bring characters and performances like that to the screen whether in other projects or my own.

You not only act but you are also a singer! You even opened up for the band Blue’s Traveler. Tell us a bit about your music and your experiences in that industry. Music is what has gotten me to where I am today. It has opened so many doors and introduced me to so many new experiences. When I first started singing and writing songs I was heavily influenced by bands like Pearl Jam and other 90’s, early 2000’s rock bands and artists. My voice changed a lot over the years and so did my songs. I was able to make about 6 records and work with so many amazing musicians and producers. Eventually I was able to open for artists such as Andy Grammar, Jason Reeves and Blues Traveler. I will never forget those experiences because they really shaped me and brought me to where I am today.

What kind off challenges do you face when going out there and trying to follow your dreams?

I think nowadays with social media and the ability to see everyone else’s journey so easily through that, it can sometimes force a comparison of our life and someone else’s – and in the industry or really anything in life for that matter, the journey is different for everyone. I try to learn from the mistakes and from the experiences I have. I’ve learned that everyone’s journey is different and that it takes time to build and to create something. Challenges make us stronger and it’s crucial to surround yourself with people who encourage us and make us stronger. I think it’s good to always be learning, always be growing and to find what works for you. I believe in following your passion and I believe that if you do something every day to move forward, even if it looks like small steps, it will pay off. Those small steps add up, and as long as you keep moving forward and treat others kindly, that is what matters.

I have also been writing and working on other projects, including a TV show that I’m pitching now, and a feature film. My goal is to create a body of work to help open the door to the larger projects that I want to make as well.

You can find out our more about Josh and keep up with his latest projects by following him on social media!

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/joshlacount/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/joshlacount

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/joshlacount/

    Josh LaCount talks to us about fandom, geek life and his current projects! Josh LaCount is an actor, director, singer, songwriter and all around fanboy! He is an upcoming geek that you should absolutely keep your eye on!