#I'll try posting more and react to people ask faster

[keykittygirl]

Does Keya have a favorite food?

Well...

She does actually...

At new Year before the spiders minions being released to the city, the time Redson was just heating up the stoves while DBK was still on his way heading toward where his 'son' is (which is in a food atand he just prepared)

Mrs. Xing and the other caretakers are taking all the orphan to watch the new year parade and fireworks.

All the kids get to buy one thing each, and it's can be a meal or something else as long as it cheap.

It was Keya turn to pick things for her to bought, and Mrs. Xing were the one that accompanying her, as they stumbled upon Red food spicy food stand, and Keya ask Mrs. Xing if she can buy that.

Although Mrs. Xing is a bit hesitate at first on seeing the level of the food, but Keya have always been a spicy food lover so she bought her a bowl of inferno level spicy noodle (Keya pick that level) as the noodles was the cheapest menu there.

And well she took a bite, and immediately take another bite till she finished her bowl, even though she knows Red was the one that attack the city long time ago, she decided to thank him (cuz he's been acting nicely at them) and say that his food is so yummy that she actually wanted more but can't.

Red who's surprised seeing a 'mortal' child manage to finish a bowl of his inferno level noodles and thinks it's impressive, he also love the praise the child gave him, although seeing the child sad face cuz she can't have more, he decided to gave away a kebab sticks and a fried chicken (both on inferno level) to her for free.

So both Keya and Mrs. Xing thanks him before heading back toward the group while she ate her spicy meal happily.

He didn't tell his father anything about that customer of his.

And so...

After that day he often stumbled on the same 'mortal' child as she keeps on thanking him and praising his cooking, and start to intentionally appears near her with some spicy foods...

The traffic lights trio was just hang out after season three before chapter one of lotus and butterfly even started :

Mei : "hey Redboy what's that on your jacket?"

MK : appear behind red and looking at something that a bit pointed out from his jacket pocket

Red : "oh that's..." realizing something "OH... OH I forgot I have to do something for a bit!"

Immediately teleport with his flames

Mei : "what's up with him?"

MK : shrugged "dunno maybe he left something on his garage or something..."

On a different part of the city...

Keya : running away from kidnappers again her cloak flattering by the wind.

Red : suddenly appears way front of her while holding an inferno levels beef kebab on his hand.

Keya : ran past through him while also grabbing the beef kebab from his hand while saying thank you along the way, and continue running while eating it, and didn't even flinch from how spicy it is.

Keya : "Thanks again the Demon Bull Prince Redson!"

Red : "I'm only doing this cuz you're my loyal customer! And I told you to just call me by my name mortal!"

He's actually giving it to her for free...

Keya : "Got it! Sorry! Have a nice day!"

She keeps on running even while saying that not while eating the kebab.

He teleport back with his flames toward where MK and Mei was slurping their boba and act like nothing ever happened, he didn't even bother to help the girl with the kidnapper problem she's currently facing nor even saying 'you're welcome' back at the child.

[not-magdi]

"Be my Valentine?"

Warnings: none :)

Summary: Lando surprises you on Valentine's Day.

Word Count: 1k

Reading Time: 4min 12sec

A/N

I am so sorry for not updating again, but life has been really stressful lately. I sadly can't promise you that it is going to be better a school is about to start again but I'll try.

Love y'all Magdi <3

February 13th, tomorrow is Valentine's Day, and you just ended a call with Lando, who was currently in Barcelona testing the new car. When he first told you he would be away for the 14th, disappointment and sadness were the only emotions you felt.   

Valentine's has been your favourite holiday since you were a little girl. It didn't matter if you had somebody or not. The pink hearts everywhere, the smell of roses in the air, and people all around being in love made it so special for you. 

And for two years, you got to spend Valentine's with the love of your life, Lando Norris. Although every day was special with Lando, he always made extra efforts for the 14th, such as preparing breakfast in bed, presenting flowers in a rainbow of colours, and gifting sparkling jewellery.

So, him not being here home with you this year crushed your spirits for tomorrow completely. Lando felt incredibly bad when he found out when the tests were, but nothing prepared him for how the spark in your eyes disappeared when he told you. 

Guilt was eating him up the entire trip to Barcelona. Even Oscar noticed and asked what was up. 

------

After you hung up with Lando, you decided to cuddle yourself up on your couch and do some self-care while watching some nineties rom-com. 

You knew it wasn't Lando's fault he didn't have a say in when the testing was going to be, but you were still really disappointed he couldn't be with you. 

------

Your stiff back and sore neck were the result of you falling asleep on the couch yesterday. The TV was still running when you decided to get up and make yourself breakfast. 

The second you unlock your phone, you are bombarded with posts of couples enjoying Valentine's Day together.  

Letting out an annoyed huff, you throw your phone on the couch and decide to take a shower, wanting to escape all that valentines crap for a bit. 

Afterwards, you felt way more refreshed and optimistic for the day. So you decided to throw on some of your favourite jeans and your most flattering top and head outside to the centre of Monaco. 

------

You spend your whole day wandering through Monaco, strolling through a few shops and taking a few breaks in some cafes. And even though you were still a bit mad at Lando, an addition to Lando's Valentine's present made its way into your bag. 

Your mood improved gradually throughout the day, but not hearing anything from Lando made it hard to stay positive. You texted him, "goodmorning ❤️" to show him you were not ignoring or mad at him. 

He reacted to your message, but it has been complete silence since then. You thought that maybe he was too busy, as he told you that today would be the media day, but not hearing anything from him hurt you were not going to lie.

------

And you were indeed correct in your assumption. Lando was incredibly busy today but not giving interviews and making content. No, he tried to convince Zak to let him fly home earlier today so he could spend some more time with you. 

"Oh, come on. Please Zak, I'm done with all my stuff, for what do you even need me here?" Lando begged his boss, quite desperate to let him fly home. 

Zak looked at him with a slightly tired expression. "Do you really have to fly home. I mean it's just Valentine's day."

Lando tried to put on his best puppy dog eyes. "It's really important for Y/N. I can't do that to her." 

That seemed to do the trick, as Lando is currently on a plane home to Monaco. He spent the whole flight on his phone, trying to make the time go by faster. A smile made its way onto his face when he saw you posted a photo of you sitting in one of your favourite cafes, enjoying the sun.

He felt so incredibly guilty after your call yesterday, already forming a plan for how he can make it up to you.

------

The second he touched the ground again, he immediately rushed to your favourite florist to get you the biggest bouquet of sunflowers he could find. 

The friendly old lady who runs the shop smiles as she sees Lando entering. You also visited her today, telling her your dilemma while buying a bouquet of pink tulips. 

So seeing Lando buying your favourite flowers made her happy for you, knowing you weren't spending the day alone anymore. 

------

You just came home from your trip, putting the flowers you bought in a vase and starting to make yourself some dinner. 

You were about to start eating when you heard the doorbell ring. Confused, you make your way to the front door. Looking through your peephole, you rip the door open in excitement.  

You couldn't believe your eyes when you saw your boyfriend standing before you. Well, you could barely see him between all those sunflowers. But what you could see. Was his adorable smile while he held a pink sign saying, "Be my valentine?" 

Rushing over to him, you tackled him in the biggest teddybear-hug, burying your face in his neck. 

"Hi baby." Kissing your head, Lando wraps one arm around you, squeezing you tight. 

"How-when, why are you here?" 

Chuckling slightly at your confusion, Lando answers, "Well I couldn't leave my girl alone on Valentine's now, can I? Besides, Zak couldn't withstand my puppy-dog-eyes." 

Laughing, you tilt your head, giving Lando a loving kiss while murmuring a sincere "I love you" against his lips.

"Mhm, I love you too, baby."  

------

After standing in your hallway like two teenagers, you ushered Lando inside, not letting go of his hand, wanting to have him near you all the time.  

You were now cuddling on the couch, your wrist decorated with a new bracelet, a sparkling "L" adorning its front. 

Lando broke the comfortable silence you two were basking in, "You didn't answer my question from earlier." 

You look up at him, confused. "What do you mean?" 

Wrapping his arms tighter around you, he says, "Will you be my Valentine?" 

Laughing, you take his face to kiss him, "Yes, Lando, I'd love to be your Valentine." 

------

Don't forget to leave a note if you enjoyed it, feedback is always welcome !!❤️

[kingofbodyrolls]

Posting schedule for My Heart's Home [update]

Hello all you lovely people 💜💜💜

I'll be making some changes to my posting schedule, so hopefully I can finish the series faster ✨ (still trying not to stress about it though!) 

I'm still keeping to the original schedule until I've finished writing the last chapters. I need to finish 2,5 chapters lol (which I think will take me up to a week), and then, as soon as I'm done, I'm going to drop all the remaining ones with either a 12 hour or 24 hour break in between them. 

I really hope that you will react with every chapter still, because that’s what I’m afraid of you won’t 🥹 because I really love it when you comment and/or leave feedback! 💓

Remaining chapters + posting schedule ⬇️

Chapter thirteen → coming on the 12th of April 

Chapter fourteen → coming on the 15th of April

Chapter fifteen → coming on the 18th of April

Chapter sixteen → coming on the 22th of April

Chapter seventeen → coming on on the 25th of April

Chapter eighteen → coming on the 29th of April

Chapter nineteen → coming on the 2nd of May

Chapter twenty (the epilogue and Q&A) – coming sometime after all regular chapters have been released (so either end of April or beginning of May).

But, hopefully I can cut that down with maybe two weeks? I don’t know, but I’m quite sure that I can finish posting all before that planned finale date 😀

Also, I've added two extra chapters, one of them is an epilogue, that will contain a Q&A section! 💜 So, if you want to ask me, or any of the characters any questions— could be about their behavior/actions/thoughts or lack thereof, they will answer in the Q&A and asks 🫶🏾 I'll open up for anon asks, if some of you prefer that, but please remember to be nice, I turned it off last time because people weren't being nice… 😔 but you can ask anything, either for me, about the story, my process, whatever you like, or for the characters ✨

And lastly; I wanted to say a very big thank you to all my lovely readers, and followers— thank you for reading, and big hugs to all of you who have commented or reblogged, it truly means the world to me, much more than you will ever know 😭💓

I hope you’ll love the ending for the series, and the series as a whole, even though I know that there were some events or characters that people didn’t like or upset them (which is also valid, I don’t even like all the characters myself lol or some parts of the story, but I did write it as I planned!). Thank you for sticking with the story, I know it’s a long one, and I appreciate each and everyone of you so fucking much 😭 Thank you for making my dreams come true 💖

[doodlesbf]

Sorry I couldn't really find your writing rules, so feel free to just junk this if you dont want to write about it!

I was wondering if youve got any headcanons or ideas to share for all the links (except wind hes best younger bro) falling in love with reader?

Specifically a chaotic reader, unless thats too much!, like "get on top of a guardian and hack into it and ride it around" type of chaotic lmao

So like that happens and theyre all like "damn.. theyre crazy, but i guess im chaossexual or smth bc that was attractive" lol

Again if that's too much, or u wanna omit stuff, u could just do them reacting to chaotic reader!

(Bonus points if its a male reader bc theyre simply isnt enough out there 😫 anyway take my heart for making a link universe ask blog love it sm🤲💙)

-♒️

*Hello there and sorry I'm kindof new to writing rules so I'll write out the rules on a later time. Yes there not alot of linked universe ask blogs but its wonderful how people posts on ^w^* * enjoy this headcanon, sorry if took a long time .*

Headcanon of chain falling in love with a chaotic male reader

Time

Time just let the male reader be when he's chaotic but is watchful of him but knows when to stop the male reader if it necessarily.

If the male reader is in danger due to his chaotic personality he's the first to walk over to pick the male reader up and walk away with him from the Danger.

Time feel like he age by ten years more but he fall in love with his male reader cause their chaotic personality and likely the male reader always the one stick to time

Time like *I can't believe I'm falling in love with him but he's my chaotic boyfriend *

Sky

Sky is a mother hem but knows he can't stop his chaotic boyfriend even if he trys

Sky have fallen in love with the chaotic male reader during the journey

Sky the one that hold the male reader back from doing something too chaotic

Sky always call his male reader *chaotic gremlin* in a loving way even tho his boyfriend is cover in monster guts

Warrior

Warrior like time on keep a eye on his chaotic male reader but is likely looking for a leash that can hold him back from going to dangerous places

Warrior is harder to show romantic even falling in love since his past relationship/ stalker problems but if he fallen in love with the chaotic male reader, it's a hard one but will eventually embrace it. Warrior would call his male reader *the chaotic devil* and there's a reason why too

Warrior will likely ask his chaotic male reader to pull pranks on the other soldiers or allow it since he knows if his male reader is bored or not

Warrior end up asleep faster when he have him in his arms or warrior end up trap in his boyfriend arms but he isn't bother by it not one bit

Twilight

Twilight will likely *try* have his chaotic male reader to job watching the children since the children in Twilight village are chaotic as well

He trys to keep chaotic male reader out of trouble but sometimes it's a hit or swing situation

Twilight falling in love during the journey as well but is bit defensive about love but give it a try anyways

Twilight call his chaotic male reader *darling*

Wild

Wild and male reader are chaotic demons anywhere and anyplace on the battle or even on rest stops even they both sleep talk together in a chaotic way too

Wild may have a bit of chaotic energy but is not match for his male reader but is fell hard in love just weary since his memories but just follow the flow of things

Wild calls his chaotic male reader by * Jersey Devil* and the chaotic male reader call wild by *wild one* both in a loving way

Time,twilight and warrior are the ones to try stop the two chaotic boys

Legend

Legend leaves male reader be since he have no idea on how to stop him once male reader is chaotic setting

Legend the first to nope out the chaotic male reader pranks since he knows that the reader's prank are overly chaotic or straight up end up covered in pink glitter or worse

Legend is the hardest to fall in love since people he falls for end up *like his games the person he fall for died or don't exist *

Legend calls male chaotic reader * chao of glitter *

Hyrule

Poor hyrule, he have no idea on how chaotic the male reader can be so he's worrying yet knows to let him do his thing

Hyrule's fairy sisters enjoy the chaotic male reader and his pranks

Hyrule the first to fall in love and is the most clueless on how to approach this new romantic feelings on the chaotic male reader so there's lots of errors,blushing and he get teased alot by the chain

Hyrule call his chaotic male reader *chaotic fairy*

Four

Four have so many headaches not only the colors but the male reader

Four doesn't allow his male reader near his forge at all due to male reader chaotic personality but he fallen in love with his chaotic male reader

If four split and the colors are out blue the one to try get the chaotic male reader to training than cause problems, green and red join in on the chaotic male reader on pranks while violet just watches and take in the chaotic that happening with the four chaoticish boys

Four call his chaotic male reader * Menace of chao* in his way and loving too

[ronearoundblindly]

TW: for discussion of Su*c*dal Ideation and SI/SH so feel free to delete this if you don't wanna read, I won't be mad I promise: *takes gigantic breath like the seagull in the meme* Okay. So, after reading Part 10 of Dignity of His Choice, I couldn't let go of the bit in part 9 where Bucky tells Steve that Tony told him that Keeps had a knife and Steve kind of sinks to the floor in despair checking Keeps for injuries. Now, we the audience, hear Bucky tell Steve that "There was an incident" but Keeps doesn't hear that. She does however hear Steve ask her about trying to hurt herself, and she's confused and is like, "I wasn't, I wanted cake". I don't know that Keeps the character would think about it like this, but since reading Part 10 I haven't been able to let go of the thought that if I were to put myself in Keeps' shoes...at some point post-Ramon, I'd realize that if I had tried to hurt or kill myself (which is a thought I would absolutely and seriously entertain in Keeps' shoes and I would personally argue that Keeps' does hurt herself, and if Bruce or somebody doesn't whack Steve over the head with her lack of eating and over exercising I will be disappointed in the Team) my nightmare would have been over faster. Like, I would put together why Bucky brought me to the place Steve was hiding and at some point I'd be like "So if I had tried to kill myself, then Steve would have come back" and I think that would make me regret the time I wasted trying to put myself back together because it would occur to me that giving into the pain would have actually been a way to actively participate in solving my problem. Since I was kept in the dark, and had any other agency stolen from me... Which is a horrifying, sickening thought that I can't seem to get out of my head. It feels like I should have a way to tie that up for you, but I don't, I just felt the need to point out a plot thread my brain has decided to latch onto. Regardless of whether or not this becomes at all relevant going forward, it simply makes your story that much richer and layered. I am so impressed at the way in which you are expressing Keeps' reaction to learning about Steve faking his death; how and why it happened, the obvious nuance to her thought process, and how you're expressing it all, is phenomenal. Never mind, Steve and everyone else's thoughts and behavior...I know I said it already, and I know I will keep saying it- I am so glad I stumbled upon your work. You are such a fantastic writer, and reading these is really, truly a joy. Thank you!

Ok, this is really interesting because I agree. If I were Keeps, hell-fuck-yeah I would have considered *mumbles the words,*

HOWEVER,

I have actively tried to picture about ten different types of women (ages, body shapes, ethnicities, heights, etc.) repeatedly while writing Fools Rush In. So Keeps is not me. Not even close. I've added what backstory I think moves along her character and what makes for an interesting dynamic with Steve. Additionally, I'm a snobby bitch, so I've tried to include a lot of things I never see in other fics, at least not frequently. Adds a bit more realism for me, but I digress.

I'm a little...unwilling to project that idea outright onto Keeps. Maybe one day I'll be brave enough to do a dissection of SI/SH thoughts and how they'd impact a relationship with any two people, but that day is not today. The idea/layer is there, and it's not meant as a throwaway plot device but won't be delved into much...probably...maybe.

It's not in Dignity as a scene because it would be a POV other than Steve or Keeps, but there is 100% miscommunication going on between Tony to Bucky to Steve about who thinks she was going to do what. In my mind, Bucky returns from a long mission, and if Tony so much as off-handedly mentions "a scare where Spangler had a knife," Bucky might just knee-jerk react by ending the charade. He wouldn't take that chance no matter what Steve said. He's been heaving red onto his ledger just to get Steve home, so fuck that, Keeps better be alive, too.

That brings us to the oof complicated part (which wouldn't be clear via what's in the fic so far since we never saw Tony talk to Bucky). No one except Nat and Bucky knows about Steve, so if both are on mission, crossing off that list of names, no one at the compound is really gonna know to tell them about Keeps if she tried anything. Maybe and only maybe would an attempt have actually led to knowing Steve was alive early. It would depend on other circumstances.

but yes, I feel you. I see what you're saying. I'm right there with ya.

[vampyres-mortuary]

One of my special interests as of lately has been about psychology. And I've been enjoying watching such videos, especially some made by therapists in order to gain their view in the content and songs others create. Stu, also known as therapist reacts posted a video today reacting to the song trauma by ekoh. And it explains and helps me understand so much about others.

And another YouTuber Keilani that goes by delightfully dysfunctional on YouTube actually posted a video that reacts to ill mind house of hopsin 7, ten days ago! But I just wanted to share my idea of the song as well, if that was okay?

So, obviously from the music video he dives into Christianity, and where he stood and how he slowly fell out of the religion. So in the song he rapped "Life is a tour, I sit and ride along, Taking some notes and then I write the song. I'm staring down the road my life has gone." Besides how Keilani explained in her video, I'll mostly explain my view about 'Taking some notes and then I write the song. I'm staring down the road my life has gone.' Comes to my mind. People tend to feel the need to look back, and like a student does take notes per lecture.

So when he rapped this verse I envision him being the student while he follows through the lecture, feeling conflicted and confused about the entire department. In majority of instances I can see how he feels alone, and how he keeps going over each note, still not getting or understanding it. And then he feels the need to write about it, writing can be a way of coping. It was referred to many and even to me, as a poetry writer who mainly writes about shadow work and feeling alone.

Writing has been seen as a way to cope for years, in which you can read about it more here and here. Both sites, Sire uses frequently and resourcefully as he fronts. Moving further down the lyrics, as I read "Is this where I belong? Is it wrong to not believe in right and wrong? My mental state is f-ing me up, And I cried a pond while asking you for some answers. But we don't have that type of bond." For me and my personal experiences regarding religion and where I fit in I was always thinking about 'is this where I belong.' And the abandonment that comes along with feeling not heard, or like you're not good enough to have your prayer and cry for help answered it feels harsh and like I said, not good enough.

He goes to question the bond between him and the Christian god. Like he wasn't able to have the connection that he sees so many people have or see, to have. It can feel disheartening y'know what I mean? And then it creates this feeling of emptiness, so it can put a strain in his mental health or the trust he once had with that god.

Skipping down from a lot of lyrics, towards this section here: "And I'm only f-ing human yo, what am I supposed to do? There's way too many different religions with vivid descriptions, Begging all f-ing men and women to listen." We see so many deities not just the Christian god but other paths and religious gods be put on this pedestal while the mortals are just sitting there watching and y'know feeling helpless. In the verse 'And I'm only f-ing human yo, what am I supposed to do?' He demonstrates the pain and confusion with being a human seeing so many religious people, structures, etc. it can feel so suffocating because he doesn't know where he belongs, and he also goes on and speaks about he doesn't know what to believe in.

I can see so much of his view and his pain there in all of the lyrics, as if it was tidal waves, hitting the shore faster than he could've hoped and to fall out of a religion he felt so close and connected to that can feel so suffocating. And thats what message he is trying to push forward. But with the backlash he expresses in his lyrics can make it seen to him that everything should be said and done as the crypts and scripts wrote. And that, in his lyrics he says he's hell bound. That there is no escape from it.

So many people experience this feeling at some point of their lives, either it be with school, mentally, or any part of their lives. It feels like chains holding you back unable to let go. I totally understand that feeling as well, I see so many of my family members and close friends that felt and is feeling like that.

Anyways, further down the line of lyrics he begins to talk about the Bible, and how humans have crafted it especially from so many languages. He then goes to express how he should analyze it, and that's honestly so valid. With today's translations, and back who knows when the Bible was first created, it's been translated throughout centuries, anyone should be able to analyze it. And anyone should be able to find where they belong, even if it's outside of religious standpoints. That's the human in everyone. That is free will.

The tempo of the song changes further down the line. It is like this whole new wave of energy, this frustration and anger he kept in himself for who knows how long. I can say I relate to that, I relate to feeling lost and wanting to analyze each page of a historical story/myth I've read. Because those are myths. For the longest time I've struggled and felt lost with my religious standpoints. And with DID, it makes it harder for me to understand where I still stand. And that is being human, that's the human part in me.

I ain't thing to say I know what he's been through, like I tell everyone. I will never know what anyone else has been through, I will never know the feelings or things they've witnessed. However I can share my story in hopes of helping others and giving those spaces to speak on. And I feel like he does the same, he has so much influence. And for him to look up at any religious figure with hopes of learning the truth but here's the thing I've learned, no one knows the truth. No one can know exactly what happens when someone dies, and where they can go to. There's so many possibilities and things that could happen, some people believe there is total darkness or some may believe there is an afterlife or some believe they get resurrected. But no one knows for certain if you aren't the person or hold the same views. And just like his lyric 'Cause humans be lying with such an inaccurate source' that is true. Some humans are liars and tell you things that you want to hear. Im not saying all of them are I'm saying some.

He soon expressed the lyrics 'Show yourself and then boom it's done. Every rumor's gone, I no longer doubt this s word, you're the One. I'll admit that my sinful ways was stupid fun. And all my old habits can hop onto of a roof to plunge." And so on, for me he tells that "hey if you're real, I'll follow everything you say to get that love and to get that devotion you ask from me!" Because we, and so many other species are sociable and wanting to feel that love and to feel devoted towards, and not in a romantic way but in a way of feeling seen. To feel heard and cared for. And that if the Christian god would come down and talk to him, he'd feel heard and all of those things and then drop his non 'holy' ways. He goes to list what all he would do and all of these other things he would do for the said god. To become more devoted in hopes he'd feel heard and not like he is just grass, or dirt that is unseen and feels not helpful or necessary.

Towards the end of the song I feel like he came to a conclusion where he stood, and what he wants to do. Not any other way, by saying "This is my f-ing life and I'm living it, I'm having fun!" This, to me and I feel like to others shows the human in him. It shows the freedom he withholds. And that he doesn't want to love by someone else's rules but for him. It can make him feel inspired to be more, and to actually care for himself. Even outside of religion and Christianity so many people hold themselves back from expressing themselves because the fear of being judged, to be shunned.

And it's actually so sad to see. We as humans in this life only have one chance to be who we want to be and not what anyone else views because it makes it harder to fully live and feel seen and heard. In my experience of learning and adapting to everyone, I see people hold themselves back because of this. Like if they do something they genuinely find joy and find a place of belonging people go ahead and shun them, just for living and that's not fun to deal with or to live through because now someone might feel more alone then before. And from an outsiders point of view it might seem 'funny' or 'cool' but it sucks to be on the receiving end. But some people do not see the cause and effect they have on someone and the lives they can influence in both a good and/or a negative way.

So when my friends comes to me, wanting to be heard or seem it warms my heart to actually see I have a positive influence on these people, that I give them the space and room to grow and open up. To share their thoughts before anything was to happen.

Anyways- I apologize for rambling on so much! And thank you so much if anyone read through this!

[hedgypeng]

I feel like such a fool you know. Seeing things that obviously weren't there. Letting others make me believe something was there. (Of course something like this wouldn't happen for me... I was really kidding myself)

But I'm most definetely not sure. Practically certain I was wrong. As suspected. But it's okay. If a story seems too good to be true, it most likely is, right? I am grateful for what is there, just sad it isn't what I hoped it could be.

And hey, maybe I am wrong. Only the future shall bring us that wisdom. But for now, it just is what it is.

Every time my phone chirps, I wonder if it's you. I can feel my heart beating faster. Dissapointment when it's not you. Our messages might not have been a big deal. Not much was said really. But to me they meant a lot. Knowing you took time to talk to me. And I know that that is super silly. But if you knew I've always felt 'not worthy', you'd understand.

I'm just so confused as well really? It feels like you're ignoring me. Or responding the bare minimum. It feels as if I'm bothering you. But, I thought you'd be the kind of person to communicate such things. But you haven't yet. And whenever I post a story, I do see you watch them? Does one watch stories of people they are annoyed by? I ask how you're doing and when I say I'm there for you, I get a '👍🏼'. Is it because you don't want that? Or do you not believe that?

I wonder what it's going to be like when I'll see you again. Which is quite soon again. Will it be like before? Or is my gut feeling right and you're actually bored/annoyed with me? Either way, I'm both excited and nervous.

I wonder if I should have told you... if I should have taken other steps. But I don't know you well enough to be able to guess how you would react, or how I should interpret your reaction.

I did have learned a lot, thanks to all this. I stepped out of my comfort zone quite a lot. I've gained some confidence. And maybe, just maybe, I am not that bad after all.

But I can feel my head overthink again. About anything and everything and everyone. I don't want it to be bad again. I do not want to spiral back down. I'm trying my best. I am surrounded by great people. Online and offline. I am standing up for myself more. And well, I might even honestly answer when someone asks me how I'm doing. I will try to not negatively selftalk. And not make myself a matter to joke about.

I suppose we'll see...

~

[onlyyyariii]

My Alpha

Sorry for all the weird posting hours! I really don’t have a schedule and every time I have free time I’m editing chapters to put them out. I wrote what I have so far written of My Alpha about 2-3 years ago so it needs major editing work.

I’ve uncensored curse words and have replaced certain words with the more adult meaning/sounding words.

Be patient when I’m finished updating all I have written. I will be continuing writing the story it just takes time. Getting ready for college in the fall is a big thing and it takes a lot of time and effort!

I have not nor will I forget about this story!

Ethan’s point of view!

*******

It's been two weeks. Liana has been avoiding me because of the fight with Grayson. She's been talking to Mira and my mom. I know she misses Grayson. But the way he feels about her is a problem. He shouldn't feel that way about my mate. Now that I've known her for about two weeks my wolf is very intrigued. I can't lie, I'm intrigued too. I could sense her resentment. Right now I'm sitting in the living room watching a movie. All I'm focused on is the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs. I pretend not to notice and continue staring at the tv.

"Ethan?"

I turn to look at her.

"Yes?"

"I-I had a nightmare. Can I lay with you?"

I couldn't sense any kind of distress coming from her. Usually people who have nightmares get scared after they wake up.

"Alright."

She smiles and cuddles into my side. I wrap my arm around her.

"Mm you're warm." she lays her head on my chest.

I lean into her hair and take a deep breath. She hasn't been this close to me in days. Her scent is scattered around the house but obviously she smells the strongest. In a good way of course!

"Hey babe?" I ask, testing the waters with 'babe'.

"Hm?" She seems to be half asleep.

"Are we okay?"

She looks up at me. I spoke too soon. She's not asleep.

"Of course. I just miss Grayson. He made me laugh and now every time I see him he runs away from me. Am I that repulsive?"

"God no. Of course not. I'll make sure to talk to him."

"You should apologize for growling."

"I'm the Alpha. I'm not apologizing."

"Seriously Ethan? Grayson wasn't doing anything bad. I was sad so he was trying to cheer me up."

"Why were you sad?"

"Mira just told me some stuff about being a Luna."

I sat up. Why would she be afraid of being the Luna? She sat up beside me sighing.

"Why were you upset?"

"She," Liana lets out a deep breath, "told me about Cameron."

Anger flows through me. She did what? I didn't want Liana to worry about me or her. Now she has to worry about her wellbeing and her responsibilities as a Luna.

"Li don't worry about him alright?"

"How can I not? He wants to kill me Ethan!"

"I won't let him. I-I love you okay? I will not let him hurt you. You are my mate and I will protect you with my life."

"I know you love me. I- never mind can you just come lay down with me?"

"Of course."

We make our way upstairs. Was she going to say I love you back? I'm not forcing her or anything of the sort. My wolf is just dying to come out again. I lay down next to her. She cuddles up to my side, laying her head on my chest.

"I like your heartbeat."

"Um thanks?"

"It speeds up every time I shift my hand against your skin."

"Well you're my mate, I would hope my heart reacts to you."

I feel her smile against me.

"What about my heartbeat?"

I smile, looking down at her, "It's strong. It does beat faster when I'm near you as well. And when I say I love you, it stops for a moment before slowly restarting."

"You know I feel the same about you right? I know you, but I don't know you. I can't say it yet, and I'm sorry for that."

"Don't feel sorry. I've loved my mate since the moment I was born. Now that I've found you, I can't help but tell you how I feel."

"Hmmm."

"I will not let Cameron get to you. He won't find you. If he does he's as good as dead."

Her heartbeat picks up although her breathing is soft. I wrap my arms around her and fall asleep.

***

I left Liana asleep as I had to get up for training. I'm facing off with Grayson again today. I don't know why he's in such a bad mood lately. Liana is my mate, not his. He'll find his someday but for now he needs to not get attached to mine.

"Alpha, you're up."

I step up into the circle of dirt with Grayson. He glares at me. I look towards the house, seeing Liana standing in the window watching. She waves and I send her a smile before focusing on Grayson again. We start out easy before he pushes me to the ground choking me. I could use my Alpha voice to tell him to get off but in training I'm not allowed.

"Stop! Stop! Grayson stop, you're hurting him!" Liana yells.

She runs into the circle and grabs at Grayson's arm. He turns around and snarls at her before looking at me, terror etched into his features.

"Get off of me." I growl out, the Alpha voice low but loud.

He immediately stands up and backs off. I pull Liana into my arms and kiss her forehead. My neck had bruised from Grayson's hold, but it was already fading. Taking a look at the wolves and other pack members I notice they're all shocked. Of course they would be, no one disrespects the Alpha's mate, let alone the future Luna.

"Ethan I-" Grayson starts.

"Don't talk to me." I snap.

"Yes Alpha."

"Ethan?" Liana turns my head to look at her.

"What?"

"Hey calm down. I-I'm going to kiss you alright? Please don't push me away."

She pulls my head down and connects our lips. I feel heat coming off of Grayson, it's anger. A low growl comes out of me. Liana takes that opportunity to shove her tongue into my mouth. The growl turns into a groan. She tastes like vanilla and maple. She tastes like everything I've ever wanted. Too soon she pulls away and I'm left in a state of awe. Her face is red as she buries it into my chest. I can smell her arousal. No doubt the other pack members can too. No doubt Grayson can as well.

"Go home," I snarl, "training's over." I send one last glare Grayson's way before walking Liana back to the house.

"I was thinking."

"Oh no that's dangerous."

She shoves my shoulder, "No it's not. Maybe we should try dating. Like I still have to formally meet your dad."

"Alright. Let's do that today. We can go to Mira afterwards."

"Go to Mira for what exactly?"

"I need to scold her for telling you about Cameron. Also she'll be able to tell us our future together."

"Don't be too hard on her for the Cameron thing. Her heart was in the right place."

"Of course. I might have to pay a visit to Grayson as well. No one disrespects the Alpha's mate, ever."

"Okay. He did scare me when he snarled at me."

"Exactly and that shouldn't have happened." I press a kiss to her forehead.

Today is going to be a rough day.

*******

[roxyfoxgamer150]

Just an random ask: does observer have more ever-lasting scars like her lip scar, that can't be healed? And does scrap have them too? If yes, I want both of their families react to those scars (it's a headcanon that I thought of, because both of them goes into dangerous missions and fights, and there's no doubt that they get injured everytime :D )

They do actually!

Observer has some scars from The Incident because the Julieta from The Incident never gave her healing food, only food from others. (It never healed because it was never healed for a year)

Scrap is- actually I just remembered one from a post lmao, she has a lichtenberg (Lightning scar) on her back and left arm, they went to an AU and the first thing she did is to surprise Pepa lol. Although she forgot about it because of her bandages.

DRABBLE IT IS THEN

(I have to post it first just incase it kickc me out of tumblr again, it is NOT finished yet!)

—————

Ridiculous Scars

One used to wear her scars in pride, while the other laughed about their own.

They forgot about it, they really did, it brought them "funny" memories.

But then some idiots decided to be awake in the middle of the night while the other started a fight.

——♠︎◆♠︎◆♠︎——

The Observer Madrigals were sleeping, so Observer Mirabel herself got up from her bed and walked out of her room.

She wore a simple black tank top and black shorts, her poncho wasn't seen. She slowly walked downstairs to the kitchen for a glass of water when she suddenly heard wispered voices.

"And then they were roommates!" "Oh my god they were roommates." It confused her on who in the world would be awake IN THREE AM.

She silently marches in, her eyes completely glowing red, she snaps her fingers making the ceiling have light, and surprising the two people.

"Why in the absolute FUCK are you awake!?" She fumed, she completely forgot about the fact she wore a tank top that shows her weird scars.

Oh.

OH.

OH THE PARENTS WERE AWAKE.

Observer Mirabel blinked in surprise, she noticed that everyone awake was gaping at her with wide eyes.

Agustin literally sputtered, Pepa had a massive raincloud over her head, Felix was calm but his eyes decieve him.

And Julieta looked close to tucking her into a blanket and giving her her favorite food and drinks, while Alma looks like she's about to have a heart attack.

Observer blinked multiple times and rubbed her eyes, five of them were staring at her arm scars.

She rose an eyebrow, "I'll fucking explain once YOU tell me WHY are you all AWAKE!?"

——♠︎◆♠︎◆♠︎——

Scrappy Mirabel was just roaming around the town/village when someone suddenly bumps into her, "Oi watch it trash." Out of reflex, she responded.

"Trash? That's the most common insult I have ever heard and you were the one who bumped into me behind me-" she clasped her hands to her mouth, she looked to who bumped into her.

Oh, it was two of her bullies, Ricard and Juana. Both of them looked furious at her.

Juana was the first to reply, "Why you little-!" She tries to land a punch on her when she dodged it, 'The punch is sloppy and not properly aimed.' Scrap thinks.

She was going to run away when Juana suddenly aimed for a punch again, the people around them already wanting to interfere.

Scrappy Mirabel dodged the punch again, she has no time for this, "Oh you want to fight? I'll give you one!" She excitedly exclaimed and jabbed her, sending her to the ground.

Ricard suddenly tried to interfere by trying to scratch her, making her left bandage come off and reveal a lightning scar.

Scrap's eyes twitch, Ricard tried to grab her collar when she reacted faster and dodged.

"Ooh your punches don't make a sense." Scrap said in confusion, they looked lkke they never saw a fight and started one for entertainment.

Juana was already up and tried to grab her by the hair, 'Oh hell no you won't' she kicks Juana by the legs, making her fall again. She punches Ricard in the stomach, making him wheeze in pain. She punches him again and again to the point he fainted.

She was focused on Ricard that she forgets about Juana that she hits her in the back of the head.

She stops, "What? Are you in pain now? Pathe-"

THUD

THUMP

"Idiot, you're too prideful to be like that." Scraps says, she looks at her fist, it had bruised knuckles from punching them hard enough to make them faint, but not enough to break a bone.

Everyone was looking at her lightning scar now, it was on her left arm, she could hear some of them saying the name "Pepa" repeatedly.

She quickly walks away, knowing that Dolores heard the fight and told her mom and dad- and maybe sisters- maybe tìa-

"MIRABEL!"

Oh so everyone?

Pepa was looking at her scar in utter horror, a dark storm cloud above her. Julieta and Agustin looked like they wanted her to be put in a blanket roll and give her her favorite drink.

She looks at them wide-eyed, then to her lichtenberg scar on her arm, she point at her left arm, "Oh wait you're staring at this? This actually has a funny story I'll tell ya-"

"HIJA WHY DO YOU HAVE A SCAR ON YOUR ARM STRAIGHT TO YOUR BACK-"

"DAMN IT MIRABEL THIS IS WHY I SHOULD TIE YOU UP IN VINES!"

"Hm! Now I'm starting to panic on how did it form"

"Clear skies clear SKIES-"

"MIRABEL!" Ah- abuela is also here.

[hearteyes-for-killmonger]

HER

I was rollin' around and in my mind it occurred. What if God was a HER?

Quick lil one-shot. Erik is onstage at a poetry night.

The words Urban Fever flashed neon above the familiar stage that Erik had seen countless nights through Open Mics and jazzy blues. Erik took the stage for the former, a first time poet created by the woes of heartbreak. He'd been through a lifetime in under a year.

A packed house sat before him as he adjusted the mic making it taller from the last poet who was 5'6 in her clunky platforms. Lights blinded him from the faces of the crowd and he squinted as the liquor in his system along with the vibe of the room made his mind run backward with reminiscing. His tongue was loose recounting his too brief time with.. Her.

"I swear I lost my train of thought when I passed her, fro godly like a pastor, skin like brown alabaster.

Astral choirs sing jagged edge cause shorty done walked right out of heaven a vision fulfledged."

NINE MONTHS BACK

"E, What you doing," Diamond's irritation cut into his sinful and lustful thoughts. For a minute he forgot he was in a relationship. He couldn't say he was in love but neither could most people. Diamond was down for him at least, he knew that for sure. "E!!"

"Hm?" His mind blanked so bad he missed the turn to take Diamond to work which meant he'd be late meeting his other bitch once he dropped her off. She sighed throwing her arms.

"Really E?" Diamond cut with a look that could kill. She was visibly sick of his shit but still there.. "You gone check this bitch out right in front of me when I'm in the car? Beside you?" She pushed the wheel causing the car to drift slightly into the left lane nearly hitting the car there before he righted it. "You that bold?"

He took a low look at her from the side of his eye as he kept driving. He'd passed the girl because Diamond made him gas the car so not to get hit.

"You trippin."

"Don't do that," she groaned. "Don't LIE. You want the bitch, go get the bitch." Impulsively she grabbed for the wheel again but he blocked her. "Let me out."

"You extra right now, chill out."

"Don't tell me to chill," she grit pushing the side of his head. He gave her another side eye as he contemplated pulling over.

"Just let me turn around.. Okay?"

She groaned as her head hit back on the headrest. "I don't know why I fuck with you, you ain't shit, never gonna be shit, make me feel like shit over your shit. It's just shit."

"So leave then Diamond! I don't need to hear that shit."

"I really should.. I'm not dumb, I know you cheating! I don't know why I stay with you when I know better."

"You know why."

Eight thick inches explained exactly why. He purposely missed the next turn hoping to find that girl walking again before she disappeared.

"I swear to-," she jumped suddenly, "LET ME OUT. I'M DONE, LET ME OUT!"

"Aye, chill. I'm a get you to work."

"NO. FUCK YOU," she pointed popping her door open before the car could make a full stop. He didn't stop and she either had to roll out or shut the door. She slammed it. She was finna be late as hell.. Meanwhile he was circling the area tryna go back to find that mystery woman he'd spotted before. Diamond wasn't dumb. She was shaking with anger, talking to herself.

The tall drink of hot chocolate with the god tier afro stood gracefully at the crosswalk looking like she'd flewn right out of heaven and into Stockton. Erik didn't know what the hell he was thinking.. he wasn't.. but he was damn near leaning on Diamond while steering the car closer to the sidewalk, rolling at a crawl to match this new woman's pace as his current sat fuming in the seat, shoving him off of her.

This new woman was divine. There were diamonds dusted in her skin like he'd never seen on a woman who wasn't on a TV screen. When she walked down the sidewalk, the world became chopped and screwed. That's how fixated he was. Not even Diamond slapping at him or shoving him could break his focus on that woman and her walk as he cruised beside her as though the surrounding traffic didn't exist.

"LET ME OUT," Diamond yelled smacking his face. She'd been trying the break the passenger door handle.. like he wouldn't make her pay for it. He finally stopped the car to let her noisy ass walk.

"Bye," he muttered pulling off to catch up with the fro'd up goddess.

"DON'T TALK TO HIM, HE'S TRASH," Diamond yelled from afar, her voice carrying faster than she could physically catch up. Erik wasn't bothered or embarrassed.

He had to think carefully of what to say. How could he impress this girl without her thinking he was a creep? Following her probably wasn't helping. Luckily she dropped something. It looked like money. Seizing his opportunity, he quickly parked in a no parking zone and dashed to snatch up what he discovered to be a twenty dollar bill.

"AYE.." he called ahead to no avail. He had to jog to catch up and when he reached her side, he noticed she had in earbuds. He waved for her attention and she fixed her eyes cautiously. Her almond eyes lined in jet black were just as black. She gritted on him hard. Even her disgusted face attracted him. She turned her nose up until she saw the twenty in his hand folded the same way the one in her pocket had been. He had her. "You dropped this.."

His hand smoothly ghosted hers as she took it. She felt like velvet to the touch.

"Thanks.."

She gave him a second look and he bit his lip as he met her eyes wondering how to make his next move.

"Ok.. so that's it?"

Her question caught him off guard.

"You do all that, follow me for damn near three blocks and now you've got nothing to say? That was anticlimactic."

Erik's jaw dropped slightly before he caught it.

"Wanna ride?"

She turned her nose up and he presented his key fob watching her deliberate on whether or not to trust him.

"Might as well.. before you get towed. Goofy ass," she mumbled with humor. There was something about her voice that was familiar and calming, the deep timbre. He rushed to retrieve the car. His face said it all as he opened the car door for her. It wasn't something he'd been in a habit of doing.

"Why thank you," she smirked.

"Of course... Why walk when you can be chauffeured," he commented when he was in.

"I like my woman black as the heart of an Aryan. Black as the back of a diabetic's neck. Black as coffee with no cream. My girl looks like 2 AM in a blackout."

Erik glanced wistfully to his memories ignorant to the soulful groans, snaps, and hums from the crowd. Of course his woman was no more, but he carried her still regardless..

Erik was stuck. He couldn't be away from his peace especially in the quiet moments when neither of them had anywhere they'd rather be than side by side doing whatever. Nail shop? He was in the pedicure massage chair right beside her with a drink and his feet up. Bank? They'd hit the BB&T and the SunTrust in one trip. They paid bills together.

"E, hand me my debit."

"You tryna pay it?"

"Yeah, I gotta pay today."

"I already did that."

"You paid mine?"

She seemed pleasantly shocked which was what Erik wanted.. to make her happy. Especially considering the pushback she got for their relationship. There were a lot of hating ass bitches.

"I heard you talked to Bianca.." He watched for any sign that she was omitting details to spare him. He didn't need to be spared. She took a deep breath and he knew without her speaking that some choice words had been exchanged. Afterall, he was playing Bianca with a whole girlfriend before leaving them both for this new flame. Bianca hadn't reacted well when she found out. "What she say," he inquired with faux calm. He had every intention of cussing out all his exes.. every one of them who had a problem with him moving on. It was the side effect of dating crazy bitches. They were too passionate. They couldn't just let shit rock, they had to harass him and his girl.

"I ain't worried about her, she can try me if she wants.. I'll knock her ass out that's for sure."

"Aight then," Erik smirked. He still planned to say something. "What she say though," he pressed.

"Same shit. She can't comment on anything but my skin because she knows I look better then her."

Erik was disappointed every time he thought of the fact that he'd unknowingly fucked a self hating colorist. He hadn't seen it before but now that he was serious about this new girl, true colors were showing.. and it wasn't just Bianca.

In a moment of fuck it after a sweaty quickie in the post office parking lot, Erik uploaded a chest-up pic of him and his cutie glowing from within with smiles white enough to rival the purest coke. She clung to him, laughing from the gut with crinkled eyes about something they'd both previously witnessed and he was grinning full force. That was the shot. Very pure. It'd brought him joy just looking at it, but others ain't feel what he felt and they had words about it. He cut off a childhood friend over a conversation where the guy'd said something casually insulting.

"How you ain't mean it when it came outta your mouth," Erik challenged. His friend was a damn coon.

Even worse was witnessing the treatment of her when it wasn't immediately clear they were together. She stood firm and held her own with class and dignity but it was work she didn't deserve to have to do. He couldn't be there for it all and even before he'd entered her life these problems were there.. but still..

"You know you perfect?" Erik asked this question at least once every other day to uplift his woman.

"Erik I need you to pick me up from work today," she said one day and when he asked why, she stated that her tire was flat. There was a nail in it. He sighed rubbing roughly through the fuzzy growout at the base of his locs. It had Evil Ex written all over it.

"I'll take take of it," he ensured. "I'll meet you for lunch too, wait for me."

His dedication knew no bounds. His loyalty had never before existed. His feelings for this woman were like nothing he'd ever felt.

Five months in.. he felt the same way. He'd never lived with a woman.. He'd never been faithful in his life, but then he'd never been in love.

Eight months.. she was still perfection through the good and bad and he'd do anything. He saw it all. The attitude, the dookie braids, the subtle insecurities, the slight messiness around the house, the flaws.. and all he could think of was that... he had his eye on a ring.. one with diamonds that matched the diamonds he saw in her soft rich deep brown skin.

"I'm casting all my game hoping she bite. Told her ass: You got that air that I like. Derriere sky high bite down I like to hit it from the bike. She say she love when daddy cum and fill it up just right."

The ring was still in Erik's pocket. It flipped absentmindedly through his fingers as he spoke. Unfortunately she'd never gotten it.

26 DAYS PRIOR

Erik gave backshots through the hour of 5 PM. Both he and his girl had arrived home around the same time and it was on sight.

"Hey.. Bae.. Get up and fix me something to eat," he whispered in her ear as she was laid out and half asleep. He was laid out as well with little energy after emptying himself of everything. He nudged her and she groaned but sat up.

"You can't fix it? I don't wanna move," she snickered.

"Pleaaaase," he begged watching her give in as she stretched. He smacked her ass as she rose. Then he rolled over and closed his eyes, hungry but ready to sleep. He inhaled her fresh scent left over on the pillow. It reminded him of oceans.

The doorbell rang.

He figured it was a package, something else she'd ordered. The closet was full. He drifted off.

When a half hour passed he opened his eyes and she still hadn't returned, she had to be cooking something. The thought hit him to surprise her in the kitchen by taking her as she cooked. It would be sexy..

When he walked out to the kitchen, he immediately entered a state of shock. Not only was she not cooking or coming back.. She had left a note that amounted to this:

Erik.. I'm leaving you for my ex.

Apparently her ex had showed which meant they'd been in contact... she even let him in.

Turned out he'd been a rebound all along.

"I should've known better..," Erik's head dropped in dark humor as his story came to a close. "When a goddess says her name is Karma that means misery. Better run if you got a history. I guess if she's God then God's testing me. Cuz she sure left with the best of me."

@soufcakmistress @itsiesha @ju5tp34chy @scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade @blackpantherimagines @blackpinup22 @muse-of-mbaku @goddessofthundathighs @panthergoddessbast @thadelightfulone @misspooh @marvelmaree @youreadthatright @forbeautyandlife @theunsweetenedtruth @bidibidibombaclaat @myboyfriendgiriboy @dameshaemonique @hidden-treasures21 @mysidefanting @hold-me-like-a-heart-beat @syndrlla97 @winteroflife @thotyana-in-this-hoe   @texasbama @gingerylimonte @princessstevens   @magic-madness-heavensin @wawakanda-btch @wakanda-inspired @blackgirloneshots @thegucciwaffle @thiccdaddy-mbaku @purplehairgawdess @indigoxsummers   @dynastylnoire @iamrheaspeaks @blowmymbackout @they-call-me-le @theblulife @raysunshine78 @sheisexcellent-blog

[painted-crow]

Storage Bunker Snake vs Rapid Fire Bird

This post is an exploration, not an explanation (yet!). I'm still feeling this distinction out and trying to form theories.

A recent recurring topic on the SHC fan Discord has been our Snake secondaries with Bird models and our rapid-fire Birds trying to figure out where the line lives between us.

My current theory is "it's a spectrum, and you have a range you can work in which probably leans one way or the other." I often describe very Snakey looking techniques as part of RF Bird, but I'd have a really hard time trying to use full Snake. I'd really rather know what I'm doing ahead of time and have stuff to work with, especially if the project is risky or has a time limit.

Turns out there is more overlap than we thought, though.

There's a Snake Thing that @mooglesorts and @nounsnlies have dubbed "storage bunker Snake," which is what you get when a Snake takes to designing contingency plans and gathering resources ahead of time for specific situations. They build an "emergency toolkit" to "beef up their improv" (words courtesy of our Snakes themselves).

Their stockpiles aren't as extensive as Birds', and they're very focused on utility and applicability to a specific future situation. Birds like utility too, but we'll also pick things up just because they're shiny/interesting.

Honestly, to me it's more fun if you're using your resources and skills in a way you didn't anticipate when you picked them up: it feels like a very clever and creative hack! But for that kind of improv, Snakes more often use themselves, rather than tools or skills, to influence a situation. They have this sense that they're an integral part of the situation, that they're a factor they can easily change to suit their needs, rather than an outside observer trying to work on the problem and only incidentally being there.

Meanwhile, I have a tendency to vanish when I shift into RF Bird problem solving mode. I drop my masks and mirroring to focus, I get very quiet, and if I'm not actively engaging with people, I'm invisible. People don't notice that I've wandered off for supplies until I show up again with a handful of weird stuff and start tinkering. Then they might ask questions, and I'll absentmindedly explain that hand sanitizer is full of isopropyl alcohol, which is a solvent, and yes I just have butcher's twine in my bag, hang on a sec...

This Step 1: disengage from the problem to Think seems to be a Bird thing. We kinda have to, and it seems like Snakes don't. Once a Bird has a first attempt at a solution in place, we might iterate on it and try to hack it around and make it work better, but that's building on something we've already got, so we can do that faster. We need something to work from, in the same way that a Snake needs continuous input to react to.

(This might actually be a single-player vs multi-player secondary difference, though. Curious what our single-player Snakes have to say about this. @reds-burrow @burnt-oranges feel free to add on!)

The RF Bird way is "hoard Useful Things and hopefully you can use some combination of them to craft the solution you need when you need it." In contrast, Nouns (Snake secondary) actually described prep work as "exploiting a loophole" for something that's "supposed to be done in the moment."

Snake: this feels like cheating

Bird: what? that's just how you get things done, dw it's not cheating

Snake: no it feels like cheating (affectionate)

...Of course, there's also the possibility that I model Snake secondary in specific ways, which I keep coming back to and then dismissing. I need more data from other RF Birds. @magpie-of-a-birb thoughts? Which parts of this do you do?

[mariaiscrafting]

ahhhh ty ty ty <3

ok, so I think that what makes Dream act this way (iykyk) is how dreamwastaken became so big so quickly. and by quick I mean fucking lightning speed.

he didn't have enough time to learn enough about cc etiquette, especially in these three aspects: influence, boundaries and fanbase/stans/whatever you call it. I'll try to explain it:

• Influence: Does he know the influence he has? Like, when he hears that he is the myct with the largest fanbase, does he really process that? I remember he talked about not being able to control all of his fanbase and there's bad apples everywhere -- which is true, and that only like 1% of his fanbase breaks his boundaries (that include sending hate for him, harassing, doxing, etc. yk, basic twitter culture lol) but, honey, with your big ass fanbase, 1% is still a lot of people. As a content creator you *have* to be aware of that.

let's take the hbomb situation. First off, as a streamer, it's you that set the mood of the stream. Even if he was only messing around with his pals, even if they did say to do not send hate to hbomb, dt dunking on him created a toxic environment, which caused his fans being toxic towards hbomb and you know what happens next. Hell, when this happened, I was watching Tapl and he was watching them and he was crying laughing over them screaming bc they were just. so loud and so aggressive that it was kinda ??? Sirs, this is literally a Minecraft Stream lmaooo

my point is, that was not the road that dreamwastaken, 21M fans, should've taken. he don't condone his fans actions but he knows his fans are diehard and will always be on his side, he should be more careful before stating negative opinions, especially if its towards another person.

• Boundaries and Fanbase: He posted a list of his boundaries a while ago, idk if you know or seen it (btw please george copy your bestie for the love of god <3) but I'm not talking about those boundaries, I'm talking about the basic boundaries between cc and viewer. boundaries that, in my opinion, should exist between cc and viewer. I get that Dream is an open person, an oversharing type of open person if I may add, but I think he should take a step back regardless. When I heard that he was taking a time from twitter, I genuinely got so glad, not because he couldn't start any drama then, but because it would do so so good for his mental health. I'm not even that fond of him, it's just that for me, any cc taking a break or outright leaving twitter is a win for me. I know how RSD is hard to deal and honestly letting shit out it's better but dream you have dt you have bbh so please don't make things worse online 😭 I know how good can be to feel validation from millions of people but. it's not a good idea, especially in the state that his fanbase is on rn (this topic is kinda sensitive to talk abt for me bc people be outright ableist and hide it as criticism like. say that shit's not helping his reputation and whatever without acting like he's fucking. manipulating his fanbase for being affected by his rsd💀 or, on the other hand, don't say that hes just being adhd🤪 when he's just being an asshole like damn that's a Him thing bro lol)

(omg it's so big I'm so sorry and theres a part two I'm so sorry tumblr user messed-up-gal ToT) - morango 1/2

pt. 2:

Dream is the proof that the people who loves you can be your downfall. istg. Have you noticed that every drama that Dream enters, people usually get more mad abt how his fanbase reacts (85% they'll react in a bad way) than Dream himself? it's not always, but its definitely more likely. I'm not saying Dream is saint, he Is petty and his ego does him dirty and made him choke multiple times before,, But! i dont think hes a bad guy. he's literally just a dude. ok, he's a 21yr old white gamer man that has a trumpie past (maybe?? idk. I think hes cured now ig lol) so he's bound to do some shitty things but he still tries to get better and hopefully he'll mature. 21 is old enough but it's still so young, yk? I kind of lost my mind during the end and my eyes are literally begging to be closed so tl;dr: Its gonna be hard for him to become a better cc bc his fans don't let him be criticized (by infantilizing his adhd symptoms or the mob mentality as soon as someone says anything abt him), the honest criticism get lost between lies from antis that don't know shit, he still has a lot of growing up to do and overall he became famous too fast and he needs to learn things even faster bc as soon as there's not a single one dream hater on sight they'll turn their back and attack him instead lmao I hate twitter i definitely have more to say but I'm tired and my memory is shit. just-- hate dream if you want, love dream if you want, nobody is obligated to have an opinion but I wanted to express mine. have a lovely day! -morango 2/2

Aight, there's a lot to unpack here, so Imma try to only go into the points I have something to add to (here's what I talk about in each paragraph, if you want to jump to a specific point):

Speed of Dream's rise to fame

The "bad apples" in the Dream fanbase

Post-MCC HBomb stream

Not condoning versus actually condemning his fans

Manipulation & RSD

Criticism of Dream, his fanbase, and his brand

The “just a dude” argument, flipped

First, I agree that one of the many factors that has resulted in the current image Dream has set up for himself, the way his fanbase functions, the ways people hate on him, and the way the Dream brand functions, is the speed of his rise to fame. It's unique, and there are probably a hundred social/psychological angles that could be used to examine the exact effects of that speed upon all of these facets of the Dream Name; did rapid fame beget the rapid rise of unrighteous hatred, did those waves of hatred then instigate the rise of a surprisingly overdefensive fanbase, did that rapid fame get to his head and/or result in an inability to appropriately handle all the after-effects of rapid fame, etc.? That point you bring up, about how the speed of his rise to fame requires him to learn even more quickly, is so interesting to me. I think that maybe Dream expected to get pretty famous pretty quickly, hence the preparedness in regards to some mechanics of influencer fame- merchandise, business-building, networking, knowing how to manage his fanbase to best benefit him. But I don't think he expected to get this famous this quickly. This is all speculation of course, as are this entire post and your ask, but I think that he just couldn't anticipate having to learn how to handle enmasse controversy, waves of antis, or every Youtuber speculating/knowing about him; and yeah, that results in him having to learn all of these things very quickly, lest he allow his whole brand and fandom to fall apart.

Second, I disagree with the frequent argument that Dream's fanbase is only marginally toxic. Personally, I think that the circumstances of Dream's fame, his personality and management of his fanbase, and his brand of content have resulted in the very specific kind of stan that Dream stans are. I don't think this is simply a case of "all fandoms have a small percentage of assholes who take it too far;" rather, the nature of the community itself breeds the kind of mentality of "an asshole who takes it too far." I only even know this because I was a Dream fan (kinda a stan, I'm ngl). At one time, I watched every single Dreamwastaken & Dream Team video multiple times; I listened to the Manhunts on repeat, as though they were podcasts; I followed mostly smiletwt and dttwt accounts on mcyttwt; I had upwards of 10 tabs for AO3 DNF fics open on my phone at a time; I watched DNF and Dream Team Being A Family-esque compilations on repeat; I watched every George and Sapnap alt stream I possibly could; I went out of my way to defend Dream against Redditors and Twitter antis regarding the cheating scandal. For the latter half of 2020, and a couple months of 2021, I lived and breathed this part of the fandom; so when I say that Dream stans are a whole other breed than any other kind of mcyttwt stan, I say that because I used to be like that, too. I usually use parasocial very loosely or ironically, but Dream stans are genuinely one of the most parasocial fanbases I have ever seen or been a part of. The level of investment Dream stans have in this man's life, the lengths they will go to to defend him, the amount of psychonalysis and digging they do on his life and character, the amount of emotion he can evoke in them- it's taken to another level, man. This isn't just characteristic of a fraction of his fanbase; this is what the fanbase is like as a whole.

Third, I partially disagree with your take on the HBomb thing, but not in the way one might think? I actually empathize with the way they reacted much more than I thought I would, simply because I suspect I have RSD (also suspect I have ADHD, have for several months now) and I can see myself getting insanely frustrated because of something like that. Like yeah, it was "just a MC stream" or "just an MC game," but that's kinda disregarding the fact that something that might seem like "just a [insert inconsequential thing]" to a rational mind might have a major emotional consequence/take a major emotional toll on someone with RSD, or really anyone who gets easily impatient/angry about video games (Sapnap reminds me of many of my friends, in that way). The issues I, personally, had with the way they handled the HBomb situation is that these are simply explanations and reasons for my empathy; they are not excuses. I have no excuse when I get irrationally angry about something inconsequential in my own life, for a couple of reasons. One, because I am an adult and I need to learn how to handle my reactions and manage my own anger. Two, because as someone with many mental problems, it is my responsibility to learn coping mechanisms to ensure my own emotional stability and livelihood; this includes learning whatever I need to handle RSD- whether that be isolating myself from others when I know I will become violently/passionately angry about something, creating and sustaining a support system that can get me through bouts of extreme emotion, finding healthy emotional outlets for my negative emotions that won't harm myself or others, or a combination thereof. I don't think what they said about HBomb post-MCC was an irreversibly horrible thing, or anything. I think there were errors committed by two men who should be fully capable of foreseeing and preventing those errors, but I don't unconditionally hate Dream or Sapnap for the post-MCC stream or comments. I just wish they had made amends quickly, publicly, and sufficiently, because the greatest consequences from the whole thing weren't even from those two criticizing HBomb themselves; they were from the waves of backlash because of their immense influence on the MCYT fandom, which could've been prevented, if they had acted maturedly and responsibly after the stream.

Fourth, you’re right, that he doesn’t seem to condone his fans’ behavior. I detest the frequent anti argument that one of the reasons Dream should be criticized is because he explicitly uses his fanbase to attack others, or something of the sort. Personally, I think he created his fanbase in a very specific way and interacts with them in such a way so as to benefit him as much as possible, yes, but he never actually tells his fanbase to go and yell at or harrass anyone. Still, there is a significant difference between not condoning something and condemning something. It might seem unfair, and it might be annoying of me to say this, but I truly think that someone with this large a fanbase, especially one as overzealous as Dream’s, needs to be condemned every single time it goes on some kind of rampage/harrassment campaign. Either that, or Dream needs to make a definitive, permanent statement against any kind of harrassment of others on his behalf. I know he’ll occassionally make the odd tweet or serious stream addressing something his fanbase did, but one of the many reasons his fanbase keeps doing the same damn thing is because he’s so lukewarm and spotty about this condemnation. A fanbase like his needs to be given explicit guidance and boundaries for the numerous things they do in his defense- harrassing/doxing antis, harrassing people who criticize him who aren’t antis (respectful criticism, other CCs, other MCYT stans, etc.), harrassing the people he critcizes (i.e., HBomb), speculating about his personal life (his relationship with his gf, his mental health/ADHD, his romantic life, his childhood, etc.), and speculating about his relationships with his friends and colleagues.  My personal ideology is that, if you have significant influence over someone or a group of people, you are at least somewhat responsible for the things those people do or don’t do, if it at all relates back to you. I’m so fucking tired of the argument that CCs aren’t responsible for what their fans do. Obviously they aren’t responsible for every single one of their fans, and obviously they can’t fully control their fans at the end of the day. But I think there are certain things that reach such a level of extremity that does make those CCs responsible. This can be measured by either scale or intensity; that is to say, if a CC’s fanbase does things on an extremely large scale, or one person from/a fraction of the fanbase does something really extreme, then the CC is made all the more responsible. Another CC I’ve always had trouble discussing with other people on this subject is Pewdiepie, in particular, about the extremists in his fanbase. Because the things a small handful of his fans have done in reference to him and/or in his name were so fucking extreme, I thought Pewdiepie had to take at least some responsibilty. Along a similar vein, because the things Dream’s general fanbase does are so widespread and on such a massive scale, Dream has to take at least some responsibility.

Fifth, okay. Hmmm. I want to tackle this point you made about the ableism he faces in some criticism of him carefully and with empathy, but not coddling. One, I do think a lot of the criticism he receives for the ways he handles criticism (post-cheating Tweets, reactions to John Swan, post-MCC HBomb stream, etc.), disregard his RSD and can be oftentimes ableist. I’ve actually encountered people irl who criticize this aspect of Dream’s character, and have had to explain to them their disregard for how ADHD/RSD affect neurodivergent people’s reactions to criticism. But - and this is a big, and very controversial but - I think mentally ill/disordered people can 100% leverage their mental illness/disorders for the sake of manipulation. This is actually something I’ve learned from a psychiatrist, regarding the ways people I know and I handle our anxiety and depression. This manipulation can be unwitting or intentional, but it is entirely possible, and the possibility shouldn’t be entirely dismissed as ableist. Living with a mental illness or disorder that others know about/that you are very public about puts you in an interesting position to receive frequent sympathy, empathy, and/or pity. I’m not saying that empathy for Dream having ADHD/RSD is entirely unjustified; on the contrary, I have frequently expressed how I can relate to his ADHD symptoms and have defended him for expressing those symptoms, both on mcytblr and in real life. I am saying that Dream fans tend to use his ADHD as a kind of shield for a lot of criticism levied against him, including the supposition that he could be manipulating his fanbase to defend him because of his public expressions of RSD. So yes, my theory is that Dream knows how to levy every aspect of his life for his personal gain and for the growth of his brand, and that includes his ADHD. I think he has courage for his openess about his ADHD, I think his openness has contributed to the rise in awareness of mental health and empathy for neurodivergent people within Gen Z, and I think at least some of his expressions of RSD publicly/online weren’t intentionally made public. All that being said, I also think he has to know just how much his fanbase cares about defending him for his ADHD, and I think he has to know that some of the things he does related to his neurodivergence endear him to his audience, in a coddling, baby-ing, mildly ableist sorta way.  Maybe this is all incredibly presumptuous of me. Of course, I can never know the real intentions behind any Dream video, Tweet, or stream. Maybe I’m just projecting, because I can see myself doing just this, if I had the maturity I had circa 2018-2019. Idfk know, man.

Sixth, I actually agree with you here, people probably do get more mad at his fanbase than him. Dream puts out content pretty seldomly, considering the frequency of content output for other Youtubers/streamers in his field/at his brand size. And yet, he has received masses of criticism. Considering that the things Dream himself does/says do not entirely correlate with the amount of criticism he receives, I think it’s a logical assumption that a lot of that criticism actually goes back to the size of his presence online, rather than the man himself. That is to say, because of the massive community he’s amassed, the exponential growth of his fanbase, their presence on every single social media site and in virtually every single Internet space/fandom, and the size of his metaphysical presence in his fields, Dream is much bigger than the man himself, so the criticism he receives will, at least in part, be a direct or indirect result of all these other aspects of the Dream brand.  Something I don’t think many Dream fans/stans, or even most MCYT fans in general, understand, is that Dream isn’t just “one guy” in the eyes of the Internet- at least, not anymore. He hasn’t been for nearly a year. Like Pewdiepie, Mr. Beast, and other CCs who have amassed similar levels of fame and wealth via Internet content creation, Dream is a brand now, and most people will treat him as such. He isn’t just some uwu soft boy playing Minecraft anymore. He is on a whole other level from any other MCYT in his friend circle or colleague interaction bubble. His words will never again live in a vaccum or private bubble, his friend circle will never again be under anything less than intense scrutiny, his past actions will never again be simple mistakes or silly errors, his words will never again be casual tweets or streams for laughs among a couple thousand followers. Dream’s name represents something much bigger than just the one man. As such, all aspects of his brand, including his fanbase, will tie back to him and, ultimately, to any general criticism of him.

I’m not saying I like any of this, and I actually think the evolution of influencers from people to a marketable brand with similar mechanisms, responsibilities, and liabilities as a corporation is some kind of late capitalism nightmare fuel; I’m just stating my own observations and theories as to why so much anti-Dream criticism seems to be directed at his fanbase, rather than him.

Seventh, he’s just a guy, you’re right, but I think a lot of the antis on Tumblr understand this more than you know. As I’ve seen it, the sentiment among much of the “DSMP stans DNI” crowd seems to be that of “Dream/other MCYTs are such ‘bad’ people, so why do their fans stick to these mediocre, racist men, when there are so many better people to watch/better content to consume?” We know this argument is flawed for many of the obvious reasons - the conflation of all MCYTs’ actions regardless of individual identity, the equating of a CC’s fanbase’s morality to that of the CC they enjoy watching, the exxageration of any error MCYT CCs have committed as bigotry/racism, the fundamental misunderstanding and misinformation that led antis to believe this exxageration of the facts, etc. But I want to focus on the general, underlying sentiment of, “why not watch someone better, when your creator is problematic?” Sometimes, I ask this of Dream stans. Yes, being mildly ignorant, getting involved in the scandals Dream has, and being a right-leaning/libertarian centrist in the recent past all seem like harmless things, all things considered. One could say Dream isn’t nearly as bad as many antis who are misinformed seem to believe, and that there are much worse CCs Dream stans could be watching and creating fan content for. But I think what Tumblr antis wonder is, aren’t there also much better MCYTs/CCs people could be watching and stanning? Because he’s just some guy, right? Is his content truly so exceptional or is he really so exceptional a person, that people have to stick by him, despite the things that spike up regarding his current or past actions? I think that’s what made me finally decide to stop watching Dream. I realized he was just Some Guy. The Dream Team was a comforting dynamic to indulge in, DNF was a cute ship to read and speculate about, and Manhunts were fun videos to watch; however, once the Reddit posts came out and I read them in-depth, the cost-benefit analysis tipped over to the “not worth it” side for me. I realized Dream’s content, while fun and comforting, was not entirely unique, and wasn’t worth sticking around for, given what I then knew about his past political leanings. If he is just Some Guy, then there are a hundred more like him out there. There a hundred more ships, a hundred more found family dynamics, a hundred more entertaining and skilled Minecraft players. So while I agree with you on the point of people being allowed to love him regardless because he is just a guy, at the end of the day, I think that, if we are to believe that sentiment or use that argument in such a manner, we should also understand the flip side- that, if he is just some guy, why is it worth sticking around? To that I say, maybe because people just enjoy the simple things they enjoy.

Anyways, I wholly agree with your tl;dr. Thanks for that insanely long ask, this was a fun thing to keep me occupied while I’ve been at work, facilitating Zoom sessions this whole morning.

[myfearless-love]

The Wildest Place You Run (2/?) - Hold the Front

Thanks to everyone who commented on the first chapter or reblogged, liked the story written for @cssns! Here’s the next one; I plan on posting chapters every Sunday. Thank you to my awesome beta and artist @thejollyroger-writer! Check out her amazing art for the first two chapters! Enjoy!

Summary:

Vampires, Werewolves, Mages, and Elves. For centuries, they kept their existence a secret, but the constant rebellions against the strict laws of the Guild had led to a terrible tragedy. In an open clash, it became apparent to humans just what kind of monsters lived among them. Emma Swan loses the love of her life in the first battle of the war. A few months later, while still trying to process what happened, a mysterious and terrifying figure worms his way into her life. But the man is hiding far more terrible secrets than he reveals to her, pulling them both into a horrible situation...

Chapter: 2/? - Hold the Front

Fandom: Once Upon a Time

Rating: M

Relationships: Killian Jones/Emma Swan

Read on: FF.net or AO3

Words: ~4.7k

Previous parts:

Ch 1

TW for this chapter: Depictions of violence and blood

.

"There was nothing you could have done," said Mary Margaret as she shook her head.

Emma couldn't even count just how many times she had heard this sentence from her. She wanted to believe her friend, but she never could. If she had been faster, if she had noticed the danger sooner… Maybe she could have saved Neal that terrible night.

It had happened more than half a year ago, but the screams still echoed in her ears as sharply as they had that night. The image of the pile of bodies, the blood, and the burning building was forever seared into her memory. But the most terrifying minutes weren't caused by these pictures. Neal's death changed everything…

He was a Hunter, just like her half-brother, David, with the difference that no elven blood flowed through his veins, any more than it did in hers. They both served the Guild and that was what caused Neal's demise. He and her brother were among the first to be called to the front lines…

The light of the full moon covered the entire clearing, and it danced on the mirror of the lake. The weather was relatively pleasant, a balmy breeze sailing through the early June night. It ruffled the fresh, green grass of the meadow, welcomely cooling down her hot face.

Lying side by side, they had been staring wordlessly at the sea of stars for some time. She really wanted to tell him, but she didn't know how he would handle it. She tasted the words a few times in front of the mirror in practice, but found none of them appropriate.

She just watched him, even now she could hardly believe he loved her. Just her. She'd never believed she was good enough to deserve anyone's love, but Neal still saw something in her. It was true, of course, that it took almost two years for their paths to cross (and her infatuation to be reciprocated), but in the end, her intuitions proved to be correct.

There was no one for her but Neal. Maybe the statement was slightly inaccurate, but the few people she'd been with left her within days, weeks, or months, saying they just couldn't learn to love her. She accepted it, because what could she have done? She loved them in vain…

She had already given up on ever being with Neal too, when what she had been waiting for finally happened.

He tore her from her contemplation. He turned on his side, propped himself on his elbow, and gently drew her to him. "What's wrong?" He brushed a lock of her fallen hair behind her ear and smiled kindly at her.

"Nothing's wrong," she whispered in response, snuggling even closer to him.

"Are you sure? You've been acting so… weird," he gently stroked her curly, long blonde hair and gave her an unwaveringly angelic smile. His brown eyes lit up brightly, the corners crinkling faintly.

At any given time, she could completely get lost in those orbs.

"Of course. Everything's fine," she assured him, though the desire to just tell him was burning her inside. But she still couldn't find the words and hesitated. How would he react?

"If you say so…"

His gaze drifted to her lips, and she could see his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed hard. She didn't have to wait long, he slid his palm under her head and rolled over her in moments. His lips tasted hers gently. It was sweet, hot, and passionate all at once, gradually deepening until their tongues met. Suddenly, his body weighed on her. Although not at full weight, he still took her breath away.

It wasn't painful, but he wasn't exactly a lightweight, and the movement gave her a fright.

"Could you…" she moaned in a low voice, but he seemed to understand.

He braced himself on his hands, and she could finally breathe. "Sorry," he smiled apologetically.

"Neal," she finally managed to gather her thoughts.

"Yes?" He scanned her face curiously, his expression momentarily uneasy at the uncertainty he probably saw in her eyes.

"I…" she couldn't continue, she just stared at him, hoping he would understand.

"What's wrong?" His gaze turned suspicious.

"I… I'm… pregnant," she said, breaking eye contact and waiting with bated breath for his reaction. She knew for a fact that he loved her, but they were still so young and they never talked about it.

For a few seconds, he only stared at her with widened eyes. Her face immediately felt hot. It looked like it was the last thing he'd expected to leave her mouth. It must have felt like an ice-cold shower.

Then, to her greatest surprise, a wide grin suddenly spread across his face, and he opened his mouth several times, but no words came out. His instinctively gaze slid to her stomach, followed by his hands.

"You're not kidding, are you? How… How long have you known?"

"No, I'm not kidding. Not too long, I wasn't sure until this morning," she replied quietly, but she was already smiling from the huge weight that had fallen from her heart. She had to admit, she hadn't expected that reaction.

Neal still didn't quite know what to say, and Emma slowly sat up. But before she could prepare herself, he suddenly hugged her tightly.

"You have no idea how happy I am!" He grinned wider and buried his face into her neck.

"I think I can guess," she smiled, then hissed softly. Neal squeezed her too hard. "Relax, tiger," she laughed to herself, and he immediately loosened his grip.

"Sorry. Anyway, I had something planned for the two of us tonight," he remarked, but at the same moment, his phone began to ring."So…" Neal continued, ignoring the call, but she stopped him.

"Pick up. You can always tell me afterward, and it might be important."

"No more important than this," he insisted.

She shook her head disapprovingly, and without hesitation, she dug into his bag to pull out his phone, pressing it into his hands. The caller ID told her it was David. "If I know my brother, you better answer it."

Neal pursed his lips irritably but lifted the phone to his ear. "What?!" he growled at David on the other end, his tone irritated.

The answer clearly didn't lighten his mood, his face made her downright anxious.

"David… I just need half an hour! You can definitely hold the front until then," he almost begged, and Emma found that rather strange.

She began to sharpen her ears with interest.

"Neal! When this is done, you can do it in much quieter and more intimate conditions. We need you now! So get your shit together and get your ass in here!"

David raised his voice so much that even she could understand every single word.

Neal angrily ended the call and shoved the phone into his pocket. "We have to go," he announced in a grim voice, rising from the ground, helping her.

He idly dusted off his pants, delaying the inevitable as much as possible.

"What happened?"

"The newly settled Vampire clan and the new pack of Werewolves are wreaking havoc in the mall downtown. I need to get there… David and the others need backup," he confessed as he rocked from one foot to the other.

"Then what are we waiting for? Let's go!"

"But…" Neal's gaze shone with fear, and his restlessness had caught her eye, though Emma didn't understand what was wrong with him. Normally, he threw himself into fights like this, but now he seemed hesitant.

"Is there something else?"

"No. Come on, I'll take you home…" He lowered his head, took her hand and they walked back to the black Land Rover LRX parked at the edge of the clearing.

The SUV wasn't his own, legally it belonged to the Guild, but it had been on loan to Neal for some time.

"Neal, we don't have time for that, I'm coming with you," she stated in an authoritative tone, but he just shook his head.

"There are too many creatures there, they've gone completely nuts. I'm not taking you there!"

"Yes, you will! I'm not arguing with you, Neal. And besides, I have the gun David gave me yesterday," she added, trying to convince him. There was no time to waste.

"It's worth very little against them," he said, shaking his head.

"It's filled with silver," she lied easily, just so he would finally relent.

"Why are you so damn stubborn?"

She took that as his agreement, and started running, hearing Neal picking up speed behind her as well. She yanked open the car door and threw herself into the passenger seat. After buckling up, she rummaged in her bag to change the magazine in her Glock. Meanwhile, Neal put the key in the ignition and secured his seatbelt as well.

"Where did it happen?" she asked as they sped through the suburban streets.

"At the new mall. About six hundred people are trapped inside, and they're already being thrown off the roof deck," Neal replied.

The speedometer slowly moved to 55 mph. "Neal, slow down!" Emma hissed through her lips as she squeezed the edge of the seat with whitened fingers.

"You told me to hurry," he grinned, and she rolled her eyes. "What if I dropped you off somewhere?" He gave her a hopeful look, but she shook her head.

"I want to go with you," she declared firmly, and Neal punched the steering wheel in rage.

"You can't come with me! I won't let you, especially now that…" he paused in agitation, then his gaze landed on her, and he looked much more determined. "You're not coming. Period. Get out of the car."

He slammed on the brakes, and the car came to a stop in front of a 24-hour supermarket. He stared at her expectantly. Emma decided to switch tactics, pinning her gaze directly on his crotch.

"Emma, don't look at me like that."

"Then let's go, Neal!"

"No!"

At that moment, his phone started ringing again and David's name flashed on the display.

"Start the car!" she snarled angrily. "If David gets hurt because of us…" She didn't need to finish the sentence, Neal pulled back out onto the road again.

-/-

"You stay here in the car and wait for me. Don't get out unless there's a problem and-"

"Stop it, Neal. I'll be fine, I know how to shoot a gun and I've got good aim!"

"Neal, for God's sake, hurry up!"

Her brother, leaning over the railing of the roof garden, yelled down to them. Much of the three-story building was already in flames, and the glass walls of the first floor lay in tiny shards on the sidewalk, covering the several dozens of bodies that lay in front of the mall.

"Please, Emma, don't come after me. Promise me!"

Emma knew he wouldn't leave until she agreed. "All right, fine," she sighed.

"I'll be back as soon as I can."

Before she could say anything, he pulled his favorite Desert Eagle pistol out of one of his holsters and ran toward the building. She watched him go for a few seconds until he disappeared into the maze of shops.

She nestled uneasily in her seat, and her gun nearly slipped from her hands. Her palms were covered in sweat, and she was growing more nervous by the second. Her courage began to disappear into a bottomless pit.

After a few minutes, she heard a loud crash from her right. Trembling, she raised her gun and looked to the side. At first, she saw nothing, then she noticed a new body among the others. A young boy, probably ten or twelve, lay on the ground, his limbs twisted the wrong way, and a huge pool of blood already growing under his head.

Her stomach began to churn, and she was about to turn her head away from the gruesome sight when another body slammed to the asphalt, just a few feet from the car.

At that moment, she made up her mind. She shoved a spare magazine into her pocket and quickly jumped out of the vehicle. Without looking anywhere, she ran into the mall through one of the shattered windows of a store.

It was a simple, relatively insignificant clothing store, but dozens of women lay on the floor. All of them had had their throats slit open, they were dead, of course, and the floor was soaked with their blood. The cashier, clutching the register, still had a receipt in her hand.

Emma tried to breathe through her mouth and ignore the bodies. Over the years, she'd had the unfortunate opportunity to get used to them, but no matter how many times she encountered one, she could never be completely impervious to it.

She cut through the store and headed straight for the escalator. On her way, she avoided the fountain, its waters already glistening bright red.

When she finally arrived at her destination, she found that the escalator was out of service, so she took two steps at a time and ran as fast as her legs would carry her. Both the first and second floors proved empty, but the higher she got, the more the heat from the fire rose to an almost unbearable degree. She tied her sweater around her waist and stopped unsteadily before the last step.

The sounds of the brawl filtered out clearly, not even the loud crackling of the fire could drown them out. For now, the flames hadn't reached dangerous proximity, and luckily, the building was mostly made of non-combustible materials.

Roars, gunshots, crashing. Thunderous explosions. Frozen, Emma lingered at the foot of the stairs leading to the last floor, staring upward hopefully.

Surely everything would be all right. Neal, David, and the others would soon emerge at the top, with smiles on their lips as if nothing had happened. And they would go home safely.

A few minutes passed while she was idle. She had a hard time convincing herself to go upstairs. Neal and David would certainly be furious, but she'd taken their anger any day rather than their deaths. And besides, they would definitely benefit from a little extra help. If it could be classified as such.

She was one of the Mages, but a rather lousy one when it came to her abilities. She was only a low-level Seer, nothing more.

Clutching her Glock with both hands, she came up the stairs. The screams grew sharper and louder. Plenty of people could be stuck upstairs, but the path leading down seemed clear.

What were they waiting for? Why didn't they just run away and escape? Emma found it really strange.

She slowed her pace, confused by the humans' behavior. It just didn't feel right.

The cool, night air blew into her face as soon as she reached the rooftop. Most of the overturned tables and umbrellas were on fire, chairs broken into pieces. Most of them, ironically, were used by Vampires as stakes. They used them as weapons to kill the humans.

After only a few seconds, she heard an angry roar. "Emma, watch out!"

Immediately she spun around looking for the source of the danger. David was the one yelling at her, probably not without reason. She didn't have to search long, she immediately noticed the fully transformed, nearly six-foot-tall Werewolf charging towards her.

She only had a few seconds to react. Someone was calling her name again, desperation clear in their tone. She couldn't deal with that now, she would help them later… if she survived until then because if she missed, she was dead.

She aimed at the beast as best she could, right between its eyes. Her gun was already filled with silver bullets that would stop it. Assuming she hit it at all…

She pulled the trigger and the bullet hit the wolf, inches from her target, right in one of its eyes. He howled in pain and finally came to a stop. She took the opportunity to shoot half the magazine into the wolf.

She gasped for air, her heart pounding in her throat, and slowly she began to realize that the end of her life was a hair's breadth away. She didn't lower the gun, but still clutched it convulsively. The smoke burned her eyes, tears filled them to the brim, and she could see almost nothing. The wind wasn't helping either, carrying the gray mist right into her face. She gasped as if she had just run several miles and her lungs were thoroughly filled with smoke.

She forced herself to open her eyes and look around. She started stumbling through rubble and bodies, but so far she hadn't seen any movement, only heard the sounds. The battle was definitely not over yet.

She walked blindly for a few yards, but her fingers didn't slip from the trigger for even a second. She had to find Neal and David.

At last, she emerged from the cloud of smoke, but she could only blink her eyes, the world looming around her was quite blurry. Instinctively, she crouched against the barricade, for the hail of bullets was almost as thick as the cloud of smoke. A few of them were barely a few inches from her, and she curled up as best she could.

She tried to assess the situation and find her brother and Neal and the other Hunters she knew. Robin and Leo were only a few feet away from her and they both seemed fine. David, on the other hand, was dealing with a Vampire that was dangerously close to the railing.

He was having a hard time with the creature, she could clearly see that. Without thinking, she instinctively crawled towards him, pressing herself against the barrier the whole time. Silver bullets weren't worth much against Vampires, but at least they slowed them down, and the wounds caused by silver left a mark on their perfect skin.

When she was close enough, she fired three shots at the Vampire. She missed the first, the second lodged in his thigh, and the third slammed into his side. He let out a roar and staggered furiously on the bloodied, slippery floor. He lost his balance, toppled over, and finally, David managed to drive a stake through his already-dead heart.

David didn't even look up, he didn't seem to care where the life-saving shot came from, he immediately moved on to his next task.

There were quite a few Hunters here who she didn't recognize. Slowly but surely, they managed to push the Werewolves and Vampires back towards the flames.

Emma quickly wiped her sweaty brow and looked through the ranks of Hunters once more. Neal wasn't among them.

Her heart squeezed in her chest and she turned her head in alarm, but other than the cowering, screaming humans and corpses, she saw nothing.

She stood there confused and turned her head back around the place. There were no other Hunters she hadn't counted yet, every one of them was heading for the beasts.

A few raindrops fell on her face, the wind picked up, and an inhumanly loud rumble of thunder slit through her ears. Followed by a white light zigzagging through the black sky, blinding her for a moment.

"Neal!" her voice echoed like a hysterical scream, but no answer came.

When she opened her eyes again, a tall shadow unfurled from the cloud of smoke that covered the other end of the rooftop garden.

Immediately, she began to run, racing past the glass dome on the third floor. In the depths of the building, the flames grew larger and larger…

"Emma, stop! Don't!" Neal's voice came from the opposite direction, and she paused, turning away from the smoke and the shadow's owner in confusion.

To her surprise, Neal was standing barely ten feet away from her, shirtless. He never had a habit of showing off his body, no matter how nice it was. He had fine abs (not as defined as David's or Robin's), but now he was covered in blood and soot. Water dripped from him and thankfully, she didn't see any wounds.

"Behind you!" he called out to her.

His voice trembled with fear and he raised his pistol to fire, and for a moment it seemed he was aiming for her head. She turned, but it was too late. The elbow of the fast-approaching Vampire landed on her face.

For a few seconds, everything around her went dark, she felt like her face was going to split in two. She staggered, and suddenly the bloody ground came dangerously close to her face, and soon her head hit the ground with a thud.

She squinted her eyes for a few seconds, and when she opened them again, thankfully the world wasn't spinning in a crazy dance. But she couldn't hear anything. She knelt down and swallowed hard. It was as if a plug had been pulled out of her ears, the sounds returning in one fell swoop. She glanced back at Neal again.

He'd managed to wound the Vampire, but the beast didn't seem to be giving up. He swung his knee into Neal's stomach, wrenching the weapon from his hand, punching him in the face with it. Neal stumbled, but luckily, his legs didn't give out. The bloodsucker grabbed him by the arm, dropped the gun, and whipped out a roughly ten-inch-long blade. He aimed it directly at Neal's heart, but her boyfriend dodged the stab. However, the Vampire held him tight, so he couldn't completely avoid it, the blade digging into his shoulder.

At Neal's scream, her blood froze in her veins, and her hands holding the Glock trembled. Immediately, she took aim at the Vampire. She fired until the magazine was empty. Several bullets drilled into the beast's head and body, and quite a few missed him, too. But she got what she wanted, and the Vampire slumped to the ground. She didn't think he was dead, but she definitely put him out of commission for a while.

Quickly, she rose to her feet and ran to Neal, who was leaning against the barrier, trying to tear the dagger from his flesh. He was panting heavily, blood dripping in thick streams from his shoulder.

She dug out the spare magazine when she reached him and tried to slip it into the pistol, but her hands were still shaking too much.

Then, suddenly, Neal's gun went off. She looked over her shoulder in horror. Five fully transformed Werewolves were galloping toward them. Desperately, she tried to snap the magazine into place, but it was jolting too much in her hands.

She knew she would die if Neal didn't take them out in time, and with his injured shoulder, his aim would hardly be accurate. She tried to force herself to calm down, but the panic coiled in her stomach like an insidious snake. She was finished… They were finished.

Two more shots rang out, and one of the wolves rebounded with a harsh, deep howl. The Glock made a click, and the magazine was finally inserted. She turned to face the monsters. She tried to aim with a clear head, but it was much harder than ever. It wasn't just her life on the line. Hers, Neal's, … and the little one's.

Neal took out the second one with a single shot, and Emma aimed full fire at the one running in front, backing away in the process.

She hit him square in the shoulder, but it was like hitting him with a rock, even though her magazine was filled with silver bullets. Panic rose in her throat and began to thrust backward at double speed. Neal took out the ones closest to them, and she took aim at the ones left behind. If she could just shoot one of their eyes, maybe that one would stop.

She started firing again, trying to focus. But it was too late. They were barely three feet away from her, ready to pounce.

Her body completely locked down, she could only trust in her blind luck and Neal. That was it. Of the two, she had more faith in Neal.

The first wolf leapt up from the ground and nearly swept her away, but Neal's bullets dug into his front legs. He fell forward into the rubble with his muzzle foaming, his legs useless.

She immediately aimed at the next one. This time, she couldn't miss. But the beast was already in the air. It leapt over her head, straight into Neal. She didn't understand why Neal was holding back his power. He could fight off the wolf with his sheer magic, he was powerful enough to simply do so.

Meanwhile, the wounded wolf got up again, but this time his target was Emma. He probably thought the other one would take care of Neal. As she had previously planned, she aimed for the wolf's eyes, but she couldn't hit them. Then the beast was too close to her.

His teeth chattered inches from her throat, and his claws bit into her shoulder. He shoved her away, and she crashed into the barrier. Her side went numb from the force of the blow in moments, but she didn't even have time to comprehend her predicament, the wolf was already towering over her.

She was a hairsbreadth away from having his claws in her stomach as she put the gun to his throat and fired as many bullets into him as she could. The wolf howled, rolling back its eyes, but it raised its huge paw again, and this time it found its target.

Her breath caught in her throat from the blow, and a pained groan escaped her lips. His claws slowly sunk into her stomach, pinning her to the ground, and the wolf weakly opened its jaw, angling for her throat.

Help came from her right, three shots rang out, all hitting the wolf's side. He whimpered one last time and turned away from her…

"Emma, for fuck's sake!" David slid to the ground next to her and knelt down, trembling.

She wanted to ask where Neal was, but her mouth disobeyed. Her brain dulled, she began to go numb. Summoning her remaining reserves of strength, she put her arm around David's neck and forced herself into a sitting position. She screamed against the stabbing pain in her stomach and hunched forward.

"Emma, are you okay?"

It was the dumbest question Neal had ever asked her. But if he was able to ask and, judging by the approaching footsteps, he couldn't be in much trouble…

Her face was streaked with tears, and she tried not to faint. But David suddenly jumped up beside her and ran off.

"David…" she mumbled unintelligibly, then looked up at Neal.

He didn't seem to have suffered another wound. However, he looked immensely exhausted. He was pale and frightened, but thankfully he was walking towards her on his own two feet.

But he, too, stopped and turned his head to the side in surprise. What had they heard that she couldn't?

Finding it hard to keep her eyes open, she blinked shallowly at Neal. He started to retreat to the barrier, his rifle lying on the ground behind him. She forced herself to look back and a sharp cry burst from her exhausted lungs. One of the five Werewolves rushed at him.

The wolf's eyes were bloodshot and every inch of her trembled by his roar, his claws scraping the surface of the ground.

With all its might, it slashed at a helpless Neal. It all happened in a millisecond. The wolf's claws dug into Neal's shoulder, and the momentum pushed them over the barrier. They shattered the glass dome, tangled into each other, and fell into the blazing depths of the building.

[foxymoxynoona]

I'm trying to send you a private message....only it won't let me send. I don't want to put it under an "ask" because there really isn't a question to it....but I guess I'll put a question at the end?

Hey!

Occasionally I read through your posts (mostly to see what your update schedule looks like but also to snoop through your asks) and I've noticed people have some very strong thoughts. I'm glad you are weeding out the hate comments but at the same time I'm sad you are receiving hate comments. I'm glad I'm not seeing them because YOU 👏 DONT👏 DESERVE 👏THEM👏. Just hearing you are getting them makes me so mad. I'm not going to lie, I have big issues with lowlander jK, but that's my problem not yours. If I really did have a problem, easy solution, I CAN STOP READING IT ANY TIME. I don't, because I'd like to see how it gets from point A to point B. While I'm glad people are seeing themselves or aren't in your trauma related character, trauma isn't textbook and neither is how we solve it. Bless the people around us, who stick around and help us through it (or not because sometimes it takes a while after we acknowledge what's wrong with us to do anything about it) but man, reading some of those comments, I couldn't imagine my best friend reacting that way to me, or I to her. Anyways, what I'm getting at is I love all your stories for what they are, stories. Of made up people (even Jungkook because no way can I survive on this planet thinking that JK in little bean is actually some sex god in real life. I would die.)

....mini rant is over, I'll do my best to shower

more love into your comment sections, I've been lacking recently because I'm afraid I might get defensive in the comment sections.

"what is your stance on dancing naked during a thunderstorm yay or ⚡?

This is so sweet and thank you for sharing your thoughts. There's definitely a part of me that feels very envious of the people who have no trauma or anxiety OR have found a healthier and faster way to work through it than Isabella (or myself, for that matter.) It's sweet to hear you have a close friend with such a loving relationship, that kind of support is so valuable no matter where you fall on the scale of 0 to all the trauma 😆

And honestly I'd be worried if you *didn't* have big issues with Lowlander JK! And Meadow JK! The best solution for both Mishka and Bronwen was to peace the fuck out and never look back but alas, I set the challenge to myself ot try to redeem those dudes in a way that felt satisfactory to me...

Anyway, on dancing naked during a thunderstorm: yes to if it's just rain, but no if there's thunder and lightening. I was right beside a tree when it got struck by lightening once and it was so scary that I do not mess with those.I know TWO PEOPLE who have been struck by lightening! Isn't that wild??

[madfantasy]

Dear blogging

Hello dears, hope your doing well and safe; in the middle of this worldy crisis, may you kept from all the forms of its harm.

It's been awhile I have taken the time to talk, it's a bit of messy rant and stuff I found useful..

I've been too busy with lately, I feel I'm not putting out the tons of idea of hp related stuff I crave to do, wish to take others away with it from the chaos of reality or hope to inspire even by the tiniest measures, and find inspiration and allow it to take me away soaring in its wings..

Art does takes time to make, more importantly, a right or convenient frame of mind to do it. And I haven't been in one of those, tbh.

In any case, I wanted to keep this place, this blog, a safe haven for me and who likes to accompany me, and to share art and thoughts about it. But it seems it gets harder to do so, with life constantly interfering..

It's not the first time I go without net connection for months, it happens all the time because of my unstable life conditions. And I merely used the internet as a way to store my stuff.

But since I found solace, fond company, precious concern, and— actual life, the thought to leave was murdering. I mean, I'm still in awe at the way people reacted when I came just to say goodbye, supported me to stay.. I never knew humanity till now..

Even tho I feel, I have doubts.. if I'm really worth it, keeping me online, I try to do art as fast as possible, but I can't go any faster than days.. and that I wanted to save up for a reliable pc to do much more, now it goes for another bill we can't afford.. not to mention the annoying part about using net for me is that I always have to try as hard as I could not to get anything too obvious leading back to me—so my family wouldn't know about it and get in trouble— but in the same time trying not to be too anonymous so it wouldn't be stolen from me.

It seems it's all pointless, cuz both happened, and I can't help but think that I only harmed myself by splitting my work so much that it keeps leaving me in the shadows without benefits.

Other than that my art was being reposted (not shared, but downloading my art than re-uploading it to another platform without permission); mother saw Older Lover drawing (kissing) and stormed into my room, with a look ready to fry me, and asked me to delete it..

I've been so depressed since then, wishing not to be, to a point I was close to shut down all accounts, as the thought that I can never be free and not able to do something to better myself was smothering me.

But I know things will be better.. I woke up feeling less dead, heh

Like, I found a simple way to stream my art, even tho it's not much:

To log into discord on pc, and go to activity and add your drawing program as a game thingy, it will always detect it as a streamable game afterwards, and show a little button above your icon telling you you're able to stream it. You can go stream it into a server, and up to 10 peeps can watch it.

I was doing everything to do a team thing on twitch, but no luck so far.

Also found a program that speed up long drawing videos, called Oliver. It's free and I love it so far! It enabled me to do mini sketching videos and put them on Tiktok (I like it there only for the easy edit and music) can't do longer vids cuz again, pc has tiny memory.

And if you want to record your art, and using windows:

Push windows +g and Xbox recoding games thingy will show. You make it capture your drawing program and there- got your self easy non crashing screen recording app. One down side to it— no pause. So you'll sit there for an hour or two, and you better know what you'll draw without hesitation, hehe.

I think that's all, it's a result of days of googling and going through lots of free crashing software, I hope it's helps.

And I've decided I'm not splitting my art, safe or suggestive any more. I'll post them all here, and anything not safe will go under the [Read More] underlining thing. Cuz it's a tiring confusing mess on top of everything.

Bless your days with goodness, health and fortune my dears. I hope you well, always.

Good day!

Sun, 6:30 pm, 15.3.2020

(I'm wearing it cuz I'm sick and you could also imagine I'm not allowed to share my face or comfortable yet, so that's what's available for now, heh)

[niall-is-my-dream]

I'll Wait For You

At the request of @awomanindeniall I have written a blurb detailing exactly what happened when Alex and Harry saw each other in Australia six months before We Know Where We Belong happened.

Hope you like it.

Catch up below and as always let me know what you think.

Em xx

https://niall-is-my-dream.tumblr.com/post/186287708843/we-know-where-we-belong

2170 Words

Your fingers hovered over your phone, typing out a message and then deleting it. No, calling would be better.

What time is it there? Would she be awake? Maybe she would be on a date or something? You hadn't spoken to her in a few weeks and that was only via text, she could have a boyfriend with her right now.

The thought made bile rise up, threatening to spill.

You're her Harry, a boy she's been best friends with forever even if she had a boyfriend over she would still make time to talk to you.

You hit the call button before you had a chance to change your mind.

 "Hello You." She said as she answered the phone.

 "Hi love, not interrupting anything am I? Have you got time to speak?"

 "No, not at all Harry. I know it's a Saturday night but I'm curled up on the sofa with a glass of wine and a book." She replied laughing. "Pretty lame I know. I bet your Saturday nights are better than this."

"Well, I'm in the middle of tour, so some of them are!" You laughed back. "You always did like chilling out and reading at any available opportunity."

 "How's the tour going?" She asked.

 "Really well, I'm coming to Australia next week." You replied, desperate to hear how she would react. 

It had been about four months since you'd seen her, at a Christmas party at her parents house, when she had flown over to spend the holiday season with them. It had been full of neighbours, friends and family so you hadn't had much time alone to speak.

 "I know you are!" She said sounding really excited.

 Your heart began beating faster as the question sat on your lips.

 "I am, I was um wondering......um."

 "Spit it out Harold." She joked.

 "Are you free for dinner maybe? I know it's short notice, you're probably busy or something with a boyfriend or something or maybe......um."

Shit you sounded like a twat.

 "No boyfriend and I always have time for you H. Dinner sounds good, what day were you thinking next week?"

 "Well my show is Wednesday, so I can get you a VIP ticket for that and maybe dinner on the Thursday? I have to fly to the next venue Friday morning."

 "Sounds good to me." She replied. "I've been meaning to text you and blag a free ticket for your show. Got to abuse the best friends privileges sometimes!"

"I know I should've called sooner." You said quickly hoping that she thought maybe it had slipped your mind rather than that you'd been nervous about inviting her for weeks. 

You'd met some incredibly famous and beautiful people, but Alexandra Connelly always had the ability to make you stumble over your words.

When you'd seen each other at Christmas last year, you'd not left her side. You'd seen your Mums eyeing you both up. The house had been noisy, so you'd leaned in frequently to each other to hear what the other was saying. She, as always, had smelt and looked amazing and you were completely in awe of her. No one you had met or dated ever held a torch to Alex.

The drinks had flowed and you'd got a little confident, your hand on her lower back at times and you'd flirted with her. She had reacted back, flirting with you too, and left you blushing at her words.

"It's ok, I knew you'd call. Your Mum said you would."

"My Mum?" 

"Yeah, we speak every week. She said you would probably call about the show."

Of course she did. Her and Angie's dream was to see you two together. To be honest that was your dream too.

A boyhood dream that was still there at 24 years old.

"Ah bet she loves that. She's always adored you."

"She's the best, always felt like we had two Mums growing up didn't it?"

"It did, always used to throw the best bbqs and parties didn't they?" You replied reminiscing.

"The parties were always great, especially once we hit 14." She said, a smirk evident in her voice.

"How could I forget?" You smirked back.

There was silence on the phone then, both of you clearly remembering how you'd both fumbled around with each other. Teenagers experimenting with their best friend, how she had made you cum in your pants within minutes of her touching you. How she had let you touch her boobs over her bra when she had been rubbing herself against your erection, causing her to have her first ever orgasm.

"Well Harold, I shall wait to hear the final plans for next week. Just drop me a text."

"I will. Night Alex."

"Night H."

********

You had been pacing back and forth in your dressing room that evening trying to calm your nerves. Not for the show, but because you were finally getting to see Alex again after four months. The distance was something that had been bothering you since she moved here. She came back at Christmas to see her family and that was it. She didn't get to visit more than that one time. And with you travelling all over the world for work, it wasn't easy to just hop on a flight to Australia to see her. However, you were incredibly proud of how successful she had become in her job.

When she finally appeared at the door you couldn't hide your smile and she couldn't hide hers. You held her close, that familiar smell and heart beat was comforting and needed.

You shot Jeff a glance when he interrupted you not even five minutes later saying he needed you for something. Making sure Alex would be looked after you headed off with Jeff.

Her gaze didn't falter from you for the whole show, she sang along word for word to each of your songs. You couldn't help but keep glancing in her direction and it was becoming quite obvious. You noticed quite a few of the fans looking in her direction to and it left an uneasy feeling in your stomach. You always tried to keep friends and family out of the spotlight, never confirming relationships. However, some fans did know who she was as she had come to shows with your Mum, Gemma and Angie when you had been in One Direction. Niall had asked about her once and you'd told him to back off, the teasing you endured from him about her since then was never ending.

Your frustration at Jeff grew when after the show you were ushered out to a car and to your hotel barely having a chance to say goodbye to her. Upon arriving at the hotel you noticed she had text.

"Hey Harold, loved the show. Can't wait to see you tomorrow. x"

******

Alex looked phenomenal as she sat opposite you in the restaurant. You talked about tour and about her work. The topic of your childhood came up and you laughed about all the things you used to get up to, neither of you mentioning the experimenting but you could see the amusement in her eyes. She knew she had got you thinking about it. Both of you barely acknowledged the waiter when he came by with your meals and eventually your bill. Something had definitely shifted between you during the evening.

When she invited you back to hers for a drink, you didn't hesitate to say yes. Hovering by her front door while she got her keys out, you decided that you were going to kiss her tonight, knowing that if you didn't you'd regret it.

Leaning against her kitchen counter as she got a bottle of wine out of the fridge, you admired her body. All the yoga she did made her bum perky and firm but she still maintained a healthy and curvy body. When she turned around with the wine bottle in her hand, she grabbed some glasses a smirk on her face as she made her way to you. Placing them down on the counter next to you, she looked up at you.

"Were you checking me out?" She asked, the smirk still on her face.

"I always check you out, been doing it since we were 13."

 "Well, that's honest of you." She replied, just inches from your face.

There was silence between you, both of you just looking at one another, wondering if going any further with this flirting was a good idea or not. You decided that it was worth the risk as you brought your hand up to cup her face.

"You're even more beautiful than you were back then, if that's even possible." You said in a whisper, mainly to yourself. But Alex began to blush and you decided to lean down and kiss her lips. 

Your mouth moved against hers, deepening with every second. You ran your tongue against her lower lip before taking it between your teeth. She omitted a low moan that made your cock twitch and you moaned against her mouth at the feeling. The wine was long forgotten as you kissed each other with everything you had. She ran her fingers inside the collar of your shirt, caressing the skin at the nape of your neck. Your hands fell to her bum moving her closer to you, all too soon though she was pulling her lips from yours.

"Well your kissing has improved over the years." She said breathlessly, her forehead resting against yours.

"Hey, I wasn't that bad. You never complained anyway." You replied.

She laughed a little before leaning in and kissing you again. Being careful not to knock over the wine, you lifted her up and placed her on the counter. Her dress rose up her thighs and you slotted yourself between them.  She was as close as she could be to you and yet it felt like you wanted her even closer. You shamefully made out like you were still teenagers, hands roaming everywhere before you ran your fingers up her thighs and under her dress. When your thumb reached her centre, you ran it across the front of her knickers feeling now wet she was. 

"Take me to bed." She whispered.

Not surprisingly it didn't take long to rid you both of your clothes, you didn't hide the fact that you were taking in every inch of her body as your eyes roamed her up and down.

You didn't know when you would see her again after tonight, you'd got six more months of tour and events, none of which were on Australia. So you were going to take it slow tonight and enjoy every second of it.

You'd never made love to someone before, never trusted someone enough to go bare. When Alex said she was on contraception pills, you believed her and the condom you had placed in your wallet in hope that something might happen was ignored.

Watching her face and hearing her gasp as you sank deeper inside of her was the best feeling, knowing that you were the one to make her omit those sweet sounds. When she whispered your name, you almost came, you'd waited so long to hear her say it when lying beneath you, taking you so well.

When she came, she clenched around you and you moved your hips faster and harder, hoping to prolong her high. It quickly pushed you over the edge, a low guttural moan came tumbling from your lips. Your voice deep and raspy as you cried out her name.

Alex looked amazing lying beneath you, her lips plump and her chest heaving as she tried to catch her breath. You kissed her forehead before pulling out and laying next to her. She turned her head to look at you, a wide smile on her face.

"Well, we've never done that before!" She said laughing.

"Should never have let you go to the Year Ten Prom with Jacob Stubbs." You replied.

"I knew that bothered you! He said you kept tackling him in football even though you were in the same team the week after I went out with him."

"Maybe we would've been more than friends if he hadn't asked you out."

"I only went out with him to make you jealous." She admitted.

"Alex!"

"What?! It worked didn't it?!"

"Yeah, but I wanted to ask you to go with me. Was going to ask you to be my girlfriend!"

"Were you?"

She looked shocked that you'd told her how you had been feeling at 15 years old.

"Yeah, I was." You replied as you turned on your side and snuggled up to her.

"I wish things were as simple now as when we were teenagers." She said.

"I know, I wish they were too. Do you know if you'll ever come back to live in England again?"  You asked her.

You didn't expect her to drop her new life in Australia to start something up with you. Travelling was part of your job too, but you based yourself in London and L.A. normally. When the tour ends you'll be back writing and who knows where that'll take you.

"Depends on if a role in one of the UK offices comes up." She replied, her eyes searching yours for your reaction.

"I'll wait for you." You simply said.