#I'm very normal about them right now
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A bunch of clones doodles, trying to figure out how I want to draw them
#I'm very normal about them right now#star wars#fanart#the clone wars#tcw#clone troopers#fives#captain rex#hardcase#jesse#commander fox#echo#waxer#kix#commander wolffe#commander cody#arc trooper fives#my art
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Some fantasy traveler inventory details (like what they would carry in their bags), based on two of the recent costumes I did.. love finding random little scraps and items and putting them together lol
#it's obvious who's is who's since they match their outfits HOWEVER.. consider if they were switched lol#evil villain looking man carrying around pressed flowers in a cutesy lacy pouch#fantasy costume#what's in my bag#actualyl that would have been funny to make a video. I should make a video#I'm sure someone else has already done this#but like.. lifestyle vlogger type content however I'm dressed in fully costume as some weird elf or something#pulling things out of my bag and showing them to the camera and talking about how they're useful for whatever#but it's all fantasy scenarios and talking like it's very common#'and of course. i know it's a bit cliche#EVERY traveler has one of these. but you know. theyre just useful! thats why everyone has one!' *pulls out a completely unrecognizable item#thats like some weird fantasy world prop and doesn't even explain it because In-world it's normal and wouldnt need to be talked about*#'room tour' video and it's just like 'yeah I sleep on this mat under a bunch of trees uh.. over here by these rocks. at least right now. I#kind of wander around a bit. so'#Like a clothing haul but it's a potions shop haul or something and they ramble about some obscure drama in the potions community and how the#y hard to barter and steal and entire flock of sheep or something just to get one of them. etc. etc.#I could do ones for different characters too like. multiple people from different walks of life showing what they carry around with them.#just like this but more interview sort of vlog format instead of photos#This is where not having much money and not having my own house with land becomes an issue though#I think it would take you out of the illusion if the background was always the same. I can make small sets because there's one blank wall in#a room that it's easy to move all the stuff away from in front of and clear a spot and like hang up fabrics or whatever but still.. hmms#So one of those 'fun idea but dubious about handling the execution' things. also One Of Those Things where without looking it up you're 100%#sure it's already been done and you don't want to look weird since it's vaguely niche. Like if 100 people have done something it's fine but#if only like 3 other people have then you look weird maybe ghhjbj.. or only one other person gods forbid. looks even weirder potentially#Or do people not care about ''copying'' anymore?? idk. I'm not updated with the internet's changing culture. I just have a fear of accidenta#lly doing something like that and then people getting mad even though it's really just that I competely had no idea it had been done because#again.. I live under a rock and am unaware of everything lol. ANYWAY. also would require my face being on video which I don't like. Though I#would be in costume so that helps. I think to be fully comfortable I'd need light modifications to make my face look different. which isn't#hard but is more effort when it has to be translatable in multiple angles. ANYWAY. ghjbhj... Now I think it would be funny actually. maybe#one day. I haven't made any videos (aside from on the gameplay/sims channel) in a long long time actually. hmm'st
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#something is very obviously different about these two compared to my normal images on this blog. i acknowledge this#also the sv model is Really good. and since they always stare straight at the camera anyway… and no one pays attention to the background…#and the only high-quality phantump model i could find was so horribly shiny that its eyes were just white voids#in my defense‚ phantump always just stare straight at you in game#the lighting is different‚ yeah. that's probably the dead giveaway. beyond the background. but like. i'm the only being on the planet who#really likes phantump anyway. i feel like it's a generally forgettable pokémon to most folks#phantump#HELLO this one is a weird one. i have some explaining to do. so when i did this one i didn't know how to edit models really at all#and when i got the models for these‚ the xy models were super shiny. shiny to the point that it made their eyes fuckin invisible#and i decided that since you could barely tell it was phantump‚ i needed a different way to get these images#i remembered that in the SV dlc‚ every time you find a wild phantump‚ it just fucking. stares. at you. and i was like. aha#i kinda remembered because of the test stream that i did. tumblr user alligayytorr (am i getting the right amount of Ys) said#“haha i am getting a sneak peek” when i zoomed the camera in on a phantump. and i remembered that. and i was like. i can utilize this#and ended up using just an in-game screenshot of SV in replacement of the regular content. later on‚ after that#once we got into gen 7 and it became less and less reliable to find models‚ i had to learn how to edit them manually to remove the shine#i am a software dev. not a 3d modeler. this ended up coming down to editing the code of the models directly (which i ended up writing a#script to automate). now‚ today‚ january 22nd (the day of me writing these tags and updating this post)‚ i remembered this post was in the#queue and was not normal. so i went back‚ ran the script on the phantump and trevenant models‚ and unshinified them#then edited these two posts to be normal. i have left the original pictures i took under the cut for reference and as bonuses#because i really enjoy phantump. so that's why those images are there‚ and that's why these tags are here#just for posterity's sake‚ the folks who come here mostly for my commentary‚ i've left the ORIGINAL tags of the post when i initially#made it with the SV pictures up at the top (i wanted to rearrange them‚ but tumblr makes that Very difficult‚ so i left them as-is)#so if these tags are confusing to read i Apologize. but i hope now that you're at the bottom you understand what happened#i'm gonna go edit the trevenant post now
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it's almost time. when? idk, when i stop being a coward LOL
#would be kinda funny if i waited to post it on 4/20 like haha happy bday curt *lights blunt*#genuinely can't bring myself to hit post tho been staring at it all day#it's so much scarier than posting a oneshot i want to do this right and i want to do the way i see them in my head justice#posting my writing never gets less nervewracking for me#like oh hello strangers and friends i just poured my heart out onto a page and now i'm offering it up with shaking hands#and i'm trying very hard to be normal about it because it's not that deep but also i care very much SJDGJK#but i think i'll post it before tonight i just feel NAUSEOUS#still need to write an end note anyway#i'm fr just yapping to stall atp LMAO#dog coded bucky fic#johnslittlespoon yaps#i'm also like what if it doesn't live up to expectations. LIKE YEAH WHAT IF. the world goes on. but i will be so hard on myself bruh
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can't sleep, too consumed with the need to write more top!daniel but unable to decide what the concept should be
#jk actually i'm very tired#but i have brainrot about this idea now#and normally the act is easy to land on but like#armand is clearly the dominating force in their relationship#so turning those tables requires a really solid reason#and way to get them both in the right headspace for it#so this is a real thinker how do i pull that off again#pls hit me with your best daddy!molloy thoughts
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Janeway in 'Nothing Human' vs Tuvok in 'Resolutions'
There's something here I know there is I can almost wrap my teeth around it.
#I can't watch Nothing Human bc the puppet really disconcerts me#but I cannot believe Janeway really came into B'Elanna's room after all that and the FIRST thing she says...her OPENER is#'Wow it smells awful in here~!'#DUDE....................TIME AND PLACE#HEHEHHE#C'MON MAN#B'Elanna: Is [putting it behind us] an order? / Janeway [normal!]: Yes.#'And what emotion is that?' C'MON MAN!!!!!!#Janeway & Tuvok#Kathryn Janeway#Tuvok#I can see why she and Tuvok are friends#'I understand you're upset but fall in line'#You can be upset but not if effects your work#<- Something which would be fine on a regular ship but is very difficult on Voyager#I think Janeway's certain coldness or ruthlessness which can be aimed at either friend or foe is an interesting#aspect of her personality#Ex: She and B'Elanna COULD have feasibly had a more touching scene together to close out the episode but they don't#I don't know if I'm explaining myself well right now I'm a bit ill and more than a bit tired#Something about uhh maybe....people under their command vehemently and emotionally disagreeing with them/their decisions??#you can disagree with me but not if you don't follow me anyway#Voyager a ship full of contradictions#they have to all work together and they are all closer emotionally than any other starship due to their situation#but they are also still 'at work' and are expected to follow orders. It's like a 'casual' hierarchy but it's still a hierarchy#and you can't fall too far out of line bc you're someone dear to me#but you're also a valued cog in the machine#and even though you ARE valued you ARE still a cog in the machine#but you're also my dear friend. and all of these things are true at once.#all of that of course but also Janeway & Tuvok are displaying a very particular kind of shared leadership style in these moments#Janeway is obviously on the whole MUUUCH more charismatic and understanding than Tuvok but still - when push comes to shove...
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my advice for anyone whos growing more and more frustrated with the state of aftg and fandom at large is that arguing is fun but you need to be happy. ok. you need to. its hard when bad faith takes are dropped to your doorstep but you need to be happy and enjoy yourself and have fun or there's no point in anything at all ever. ok. fandom is not real and nothing is worth more than your enjoyment. i love you please make sure to have fun and reach out to a friend today. for me
#this goes doubly for fans of color if i'm honest#i say this bc a lot of my mutuals either currently or in the past have been very upset about how the fandom acts#and ive Done My Rounds with that ok#ive survived great wars even. and they did not make me happy#yes i was right and yes i should have said it but ultimately there was no material harm to choosing to have fun instead#lifes hard as it is in the real world where real things happen why would you waste your precious fun time on fighting crusades#and trust me i understand deeply the wish to fight crusades. Ive Fought Them. it got me hate mail and#an overall loss of passion for something i held sincerely in my heart#theres nothing more worthy than your enjoyment im serious. none of this is real and the world is hard out there#you need to get a good thing while u can#i dont remember a single time where ive actually felt vindicated by arguing with people online about. anything really but even more so aftg#but i remember in perfect and fond detail every time the (now defunct) kandreil discord server came up with an au#or even just normal casual conversation#i remember asks i got years ago about kevin day hcs that i hardly even agree with now but still love#trust me you will Not remember these squabbles what you will remember is what you loved and if youre lucky thats a lot of memories#so have fun ok. for me#txt
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normal thing to say about your dear friend who you think is really cute and charming and hard-working and basically the perfect wife material
#hamefura#my next life as a villainess#otome game no hametsu flag#aaand rewatch done! now my honest thoughts#good start. the middle is kinda boring. ep 8 doesn't exist don't worry about it#this anime draws me in in the same way that Futari Wa does#in that it has a fascinating main cast and a very vague skeleton of a worldbuilding that leaves me wanting to overthink it#unstructured thoughts incoming:#Geordo's still a creep and no matter how much the story wants me to like him I just can't#Keith's siscon is very Yikes! and that's so bad because I love his and Katarina's relationship as siblings#Katarina lowkey thinks Sophia is a freak but never kinkshames her and that's so bestiecore of her. they're soulmates your honor#Mary is SUCH A LESBIAN holy shit. I did not remember how much lesbian she is#I'm lowkey annoyed that the show frames her attraction to Katarina as “haha funny isn't she weird?!”#like in the sleepover episode she was describing the things she'd like to do with her beloved and she's being like. normal about it#but the soundtrack does a silly and I'm like. wow this anime does not like her huh#I swear Geordo and Keith are even weirder about Katarina than she is but the anime always gives them slack about it#unless they're having their homoerotic squabbles. which is to say the anime does Not Like The Queer Coding of the story#I'm sure there are worse examples of weeb homophobia but there are a couple moments I saw in the manga but not here!#anyway where was I. Oh right. Ascart Sibs Autusm 👍🏼#Nicol doesn't have much presence in the story due to his quiet nature which is so sad because his inner world is intriguing#he's such a good friend. loyal and caring. I wish we got more of him in this season#and finally: Maria. God. what is there to say about her that I haven't already#the girl came in with a 7 year disadvantage on her rivals and yet Katarina is all over her!#rewatching season 1 is so weird because I could swear she had more presence than she really does because holy shit#Katarina loves her! so much! wtf#maybe I'm remembering season 2?#anyway these are my thoughts on doomflags season 1#2nd watch edition#oh I almost forgot#romance in chiaroscuro
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Happy 1st anniversary to Looking Glasses by @ferronickel :) (edit; whoops forgot to remove the space in the tag, sorry i know you've already seen it haha)
#super exciting day :D#every single page in looking glasses is a work of art#if i'm remembering the order of events right#i found about looking glasses bc you visited my blog around the time i first started posting#and i freaked out and was super happy so i checked yours out too#and lo and behold there was a gem of a comic to be found there#thanks for the support you've given me with my art since then :) best wishes for the rest of looking glasses!#also#christ on a stick how the hell do you handle all of those dark fountain swirlies#i always thought they were cool as hell but i have a newfound appreciation for them now that i've tried it myself#this is a bit messy but i didn't wanna overwork it#i'm still learning digital painting so i was guessing my whole way through this haha#was very fun to draw ^-^#couldnt decide what exactly i wanted to draw for this so i drew ralsei in one of my favorite scenes#ralsei#deltarune#looking glasses#first time I've used the queue feature#got it set for 10:30 when I normally wake up so it better work or I'll gut tumblr and sell its entrails in a flea market#update; it did not in fact work#rip tumblr
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memory, death and life as komerex zha, the perpetual game; klingon culture as depicted in the final reflection, by john m. ford
#star trek#web weaving#klingons#im normal about this. i swear.#please read the final reflection. 99 cents on kindle right now. i read it in one sitting very fun very entertaining very insightful#and spocks in it. if you even care#is that last quote not soo sarek coded. 'im gonna destroy you in this game son. every time until you learn not to lose so badly#but you will still lose. <3'#house gensa forever house rustazh foreverrr#klingonaase my darling i love you you're sooo latin coded#i really liked the singing and the idea of like gestures vaguely house gensa being three hundred kids with no formal houses or lines#to belong to. <- and so you will all be together. yayy new family!#i also liked the acknowledgment of like. other cultures existing on klinzhai (qo'nos) vulcans and orions living with klingons and such#this book really had it all im not done posting. theres more songs and looks at their food; daily life; clothing and how they decorate#houses. more examples of klingonaase lol of course cuss words and such. they also talk about battle language which if i'm not mistaken is#like clipped tlhIngan?#but they call it battle language and translate it for the reader. fun!#and of course the klingons end up on earth so theres insights on how they feel about coffee and human food. apparently the air on earth is#very thin and dry to them; every scene where they talk about klingon comfort standards they mention making it dark and humid and hot.#red lights and such! for inside#and they say the thin air on earth makes it hard to hear for klingons! i thought that was very cool#nobody:#me: they like salt water baths and dark ale and they wear silk and they eat pastries with butter. if you even care.#they mention human chair designs being uncomfortable for klingon anatomy too; there was a description i remember of house khemara#having cushions on the ground around a fireplace instead of chairs#its such a pretty description too; they have high ceilings and wooden beams along the roof and and sky lights for an indoor garden#iron railings for the staircases. mwah i love this book i really recommend it#theres something (gestures) here that reminds me very strongly of worf but i cant put my finger on it to be honest with you. not even like#the komerex zha specifically either like the vibes of the whole book.....
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Me, adjusting the Fallen Stars playlist for the millionth time: I'm very normal about making playlists.
#fallen stars#technically#seriously though i've messed with this playlist SO MANY TIMES#like--when i'm writing#i don't usually have a playlist going#i find a song with the right 'vibes' and go 'THERE. THAT'S IT'#and then just write#but playlists are DIFFERENT#because when i make them it's like. i want the songs to kind of follow the story beats#which. depending on the songs i find#sometimes goes really well#and other times does not#right now i have 'a rumor in st petersburg' and 'aaron burr sir' for two of the opening songs#mostly because they're the songs i've found that are closest#but they don't fit PERFECTLY so my mind is like 'i need to keep tinkering with this. forever.'#...all this to say i'm totally very normal about making playlists and don't overthink things at all
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Misc. photos from the past year or so ~
#image commentary in tags once again since they don't allow captions anymore and I feel weird using the alt text for that --#1. napping bapy boye sneeping on his own foot as if it were a pillow#2. The little primrose that I have seems to bloom sporadically all year around as long as I bring it inside and don't let it freeze#in the winter. This was a flower that came up randomly like mid november lol#3. Rainbow where you can see a little bit of a second rainbow near the bottom of it :0#4. CHILDREN.... love to see them.....#5. Halloween Candy ranking tierlist. not important enough to post on it's own. so throwing it in with one of these I guess lol#I am also not really a candy person at all and prefer bready stuff like cakes rather than chocolate bars (if I even have to have sweets#at ALL which usually I prefer savory food). I suspect the apple is controversial but.. I do love apples .... huzzah#actually am having applle and peanut butter snack right now as I'm writing this lol#6. Various bowls/cups/etc. that I got from a store at COMPLETELY different times like.. years apart from each other#yet at some point realized that they all mostly match in paint color and seem to be part of the same pattern#But I totally didnt make that connection until a few years ago when I was putting up dishes. I just bought them all invidually because it's#like 'oh cool! a cat' *1 year later* 'oh cool! a cat!' etc. lol.. I guess it must be a popular design if it's been around being sold that#long.#7. carne asada burrito and matcha bubble tea... oughhgh.... again one of my very rare meals where I actually go and get something..#probably my favorite meal currently. Something about the Chronic Anemia makes me crave beef burritos madly despite only having one#maybe twice a year or so ghjbhj.. plus the beans.... onions.... many of my Diet Forbidden foods... Also of course the little aishas#are there.... somehow they shall split the meal together even though it's like 10x bigger than their bodies.. they are also hungry#and vastly anemic... huzzah to them...#8. I've had this shirt for a long time but it fits very weird so I can never find a way to use it in outfits?? But I recently had#an appointment where a doctor needed to be able to look at my back and it's one of the only actual Shirts that I have (mostly i just own#long robes or tunics or jumper dress type of things that would be hard to lift up or etc. like... I dont even own a single normal 't-shirt'#or anyting aside from one giant tshirt that I sleep in in the summer lol.) So I wore this there.. I forget how much I love the pictures on#it.. how pleasant... little hummingbird... AND I think one of the flowers is supposed to be columbine ... !#photo diary
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what jersey did you purchase today??
THEY GOT ME WITH THE GAME WORN CRISCUOLO JERSEY MAN 😭 IT WAS SO EXPENSIVE AND IT'S NOT EVEN SIGNED 😭😭
shit won't even fit i bet, that man was the size of a grain of rice and weighed less than my dog. this org has my balls in a fucking vice
#you guys know how i only wear the john leonard jersey to sharks games bc it was such an ill-advised purchase? me with this crisco jersey#the cuda should be paying ME money. i MAKE them money. by POSTING#i'm sure i make some equally normal purchase of a cvf jersey i can't wear anywhere later this week too. i'm so sure 😭 tf is wrong with me#which btw. downloading every single podcast on the face of the planet for this roadtrip knowing full well what's gonna happen is#i am gonna listen to 5 minutes of a locked on sharks episode and get ripshit mad at jdy and spend the next 7.25 hours listening to#spotify's tropical house playlist while carefully crafting the most dumbass notfic about environmental conservation#which is what always happens when i have to drive by myself for long periods of time#AND BTW. RE: CRISCO JERSEY. THIS ONLY HAPPENED BECAUSE I WAS MAD AT ONE JOB AND THEN RECEIVED A VERY ANNOYING TEXT MESSAGE FROM ANOTHER JOB#AND THEN THE ORG EMAILED. STEF GOT ME IN A VULNERABLE MOMENT. I WAS DYSREGULATED!!! I WAS NOT MYSELF!!!!#the best part is the sharks proshop called me this morning like hey your simmer jersey is ready. i was like oh yay :) <3 UNKNOWING.........#all three of my jobs made me so exhausted today guys it just never ends#but then it's like well. if i didn't have three jobs. i couldn't make insanely stupid purchases either#so even though i burned out so hard i feel dead inside a lot of the time. at least i can create THE most baffling sharkuda jersey collectio#where was i going with this. oh right. mackblack win tn schedule that selena gomez lockdown starting NOW#cage replies#tausendsorgen#LESA
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this is painful. ruyi is eviscerating this man.
#star stumbles#a journey to love#cdrama#ladies and gentlemen this is a murder in process#ep 20#ruyi is destroying this man's psyche really thinking it will fix the issue....no it's going to create a bigger one#look at him. you took a 'normal' disciple and gave him more issues#it's like yes. this would hit IF he knew you were actually his master/it was said by a master to a student#but a princess of wu? has no authority to say that to him#which is one something i forgot to mention in my previous post#in that ltg literally. does not gaf about anyone with a position of authority#like he might listen to them on the surface but inside? you know he doesn't respect them#he doesn't respect anyone or consider anyone his equal. he's very much a lone wolf anarchist in a way#ruyi was probably the only one who held true authority over him that he would listen to and respect with his whole heart#i'm clerk du right now. in shock.
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i'm #newtoradblr i've spent so much time these past two weeks scrolling through radfem blogs i knew i had to make an actual radfem side of tumblr blog for my own sanity. the way i "peaked" is kinda funny 3-4 months ago i liked a radfem post without realizing and all of a sudden i had other radfem posts recommended to me by the algorithm and i was so annoyed because i was very anti-terf etc but for a couple days i read through a bunch of radfem blogs and it was actually such a relief to encounter FEMINISM not some watered down version of it but i felt guilty due to 5+ years of conditioning (and also because i had a nonbinary friend sitting right next to me in class as i was doing this) and i also didn't like the prominent use of the word moid? but anyway, 3 months later, i'm not sure why but the mra nature of the trans movement has grown so much more apparent to me i have like three mutuals who are trans men on my other blog and i would find myself rereading the few feminist posts i would reblog/write because these people are literally reblogging shit like "don't think like a terf. men aren't your oppressors, they're your friends/neighbors/brothers/fathers. if you think that any man could harm you you have been fooled by terf rhetoric" like actual morons/meninists. anyway two weeks ago i saw a post made by someone i knew was a radfem on my twitter tl and i don't know why i knew i was ready i went through her blog and through many others and now here i am.
#still dislike the word moid i know it's in response to 4chan people saying shit like femoid but it reads too much like a racist slur for me#to be cool with people saying it#i don't mean it reads like a racist slur towards men i mean it's way too reminiscent of the word negroid#it really made me think people were right about radical feminism being a gateway to being a conservative because...it literally feels#racist to me lmao i don't think i'll ever like it#gonna go follow the few blogs i followed on my main + others now#and i was actually always pretty radical in my feminism i was never what one would call a libfem i just wasn't A RadFem because i was into#the whole trans thing#it's different when you're not on tumblr/not exclusively interacting with trans people on the internet. people taking such an issue with#feminism and claiming that its most basic aspects (men oppress women) are transphobic and terf rhetoric is really only a thing on tumblr#and in those circles it's especially different when you're not talking in english#and i'm pretty sure everyone i follow on twitter supports trans people but the mra nature of trans right activism just has not hit them the#way it has hit tumblr they're still very normal about feminism it's actually so nice to go there and say i hate men with no caveat#the only people who would bother me if they came across my tweets saying that would be: cis men misogynists and people on the far right in#general#crazy that on tumblr it's the most leftist people i'd have to worry about hahaha...#ipost
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whooooo having an anxiety attack about covid. again 👍
#cw negative#cw vent#nowe talks#it's hard to describe what about it is the worst source of anxiety for me. it's not What If I Get It. it's mostly just. it's just.#i sometimes feel like our society has just forgotten that it's a thing. or that society has forgotten that it's A SERIOUS THING.#like this thing that Kills People.#i know it's not lethal to most people but it still is a very serious thing!#why have we as a society shifted from “protecting the people most affected is a collective responsibility#(via vaccination and masking and not showing up to places sick)“#to “well what if all the people belonging to risk groups just deal with this on their own and the rest of us go back to normal?”#idk man maybe i'm sensitive because my grandma died of covid a week before Christmas last year.#or because both of my parents are over 60 and my dad has another risk factor illness on top of that.#idk man. i just feel so. unsafe. unsure and scared and tired. i just dont want other people to go through what our family did last december#i want to stress that i'm not blaming any individual people for this.#my frustration is almost solely directed towards the goverment not taking covid seriously enough#and like i'm not perfect. i'm not sure what's the right thing to do and what's me overreacting.#i recognize that i am often incapable of thinking clearly about this subject#sometimes i feel like i am the only one in my circle (family included) who is this worried about it still. i'm not blaming my loved ones#i'm not saying i'm better than them that's not it. i just. sometimes i just feel so alone with this#and idk how to make it better?#like i have good moments and bad moments with this anxiety. it comes and goes. but. idk.#i think her death's anniversary coming closer combined with the rising covid numbers in my country is just doing a number on me
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