Just know I do it to myself
I give my heart at the first sign of love.
Why live any other way?
I don't care if it hurts.
but i do.
I'd rather know that I am capable of deep and passionate love than push it aside and ignore it because it's safer and doesn't hurt.
it still hurts.
It hurts when I was wrong again.
She wasn't the one who would match my love.
Did I pour too much into her?
no. I love pouring myself into others.
She just doesn't want me.
Not like I want her.
I wanted her to be the one so bad.
I was wrong again.
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when 2022 me thought it would be fun to draw stede with a beard and a silly little curled up mustache and start calling him steard for the fun of it
AND NOW IT'S REAL
THEY DID IT
MY CREATION.
IT IS REAL. HOLY FUCK
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OH MY GOD I JUST REALIZED THAT A COSPLAYER I LIKE AND HAVE LIKED FOR A WHILE BUT DIDNT FOLLOW HAS BEEN FOLLOWING ME AND SHOWING UP IN MY NOTES FOR AGES AND I NEVER KNEW WHO THEY WERE GOD I AM SO STUPID
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Dunmeshi request, Chilchuck and Marcille interacting? 🥺 Or standing next to each other that works too. Could be hugging, or sharing a meal/food, or…
Got a bit out of hand with the prompt XD I ended up doing a scene inspired by this fic! Based on that time Marcille Izutsumi and Chilchuck were sharing a bed in chapter 47. It felt very memorable so I tried to recreate it but I kind of went offscript because I was basing it on my recollection of the fic lmao
^Obsessed with this guy and how he lets Izutsumi use him like a hot water bottle bc it's comfier.
I think he'd hardly ever act this soft + tolerant of physical affection unless it's situations like this: When the others are too sleepy to remember it LOL
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can we pleasee please please stop fucking fearmongering and blaming trans men for the predstrogen situation. please god. posts about "trans men teaming up with terfs to get trans women banned!" with zero sources all over my dash. blaming "transandrophobia truthers" for all the transmisogyny. have you all lost your fucking minds?? what the fuck happened to t4t??? what the fuck happened to trans solidarity??? why is "transfem separatism" even a subject worth entertaining????
anyone who says other trans people are the enemy is a fucking fed. jesus christ
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fake screenshots of a dating simulator where it becomes extremely obvious that the romanceable characters murdered the previous protagonist and are trying to hide it from you
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he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.
except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?
at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.
except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.
about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.
he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.
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