#Job interview pitfalls

[lifes-little-corner]

common interview mistakes

Walking into a job interview can feel like stepping onto a stage. Every move, word, and gesture is scrutinized. I remember a time when I thought my resume alone would speak for me. I arrived late, fumbled through questions, and left feeling defeated. That experience taught me a valuable lesson: preparation is key. Studies show that 80% of interviewers report that candidates who are unprepared…

[alackofghosts]

wild seeing kaur kender mentioned on my dashboard. points that's the guy from my research paper

[phoenixyfriend]

Some of the comments I get on my posts about the NYT just have me going "you are throwing out the baby with the bathwater"

[joaofelix70]

MISS DIPLOMAT & MR. CHARMING |

dominik szoboszlai x female reader.

author's note: this handsome man's living rent-free in my head. he's a freaking masterpiece. talented, funny, charismatic, attractive. i watched interviews, tiktok videos made by supporters and much more to understand a little bit of his language, personality and what he does towards friends and loved ones. laughed a lot! i made my homework as a writer, hope you enjoy it! (compliments and any kind of retributions are more than welcomed).

summary: your job is involving the commitment of unify the population and create interrelations to another countries, using the eurocup qualifiers and the hungary national team executions. you just didn't expect to fall in love with the no. 10's captain player.

words and characters: 1,811/11,223. it was three days working too hard on this story. i'm begging for your consideration, lol.

────

sports diplomacy: it's the unique power of sport to bring people, nations, and communities closer together via a shared love of physical pursuits. this responsibility is the reason of a transition between strangers to connected individuals, advancing foreign policy goals and augmenting sport for development initiatives. the complex landscape where sport, politics, and diplomacy overlap become clearer, as do the pitfalls of using sport as a tool for overcoming and mediating separation between people, nonstate actors, and states. the power of sport has never been more important. so far, the 21st century has been dominated by disintegration, introspection, and the retreat of the nation-state from the globalization agenda. in such an environment, scholars, students, and practitioners of international relations are beginning to rethink how sport might be used to tackle climate change, gender inequality, and the united nations sustainable development goals, for example. to boost these integrative, positive efforts is to focus on the means as well as the ends, that is, the diplomacy, plural networks, and processes involved in the role sport can play in tackling the monumental traditional and human security challenges of our time. credits: international studies association and oxford university press.

────

MLSZ (hungarian football federation) ──

new training ground at telki.

"i can't believe that being in places like this made up my most theoretically utopian childhood dreams. what a progress in front of me!" you still witness exciting moments where you pinch yourself, trying to believe in the reality that surrounds you: visiting the new training center of the players who are just a few meters away from you, getting ready to represent an entire country.

"your presence is our privilege. a voice of the spread of eurocup to our nation, right here…" the technical director gives you deference, obtaining a measure of humbleness and respect by you.

"the honor belongs to me in its entirety. grateful for having me, sir. while the view is immersive and captivating — my fervent congratulations to everyone involved — could we retreat from the pleasant glass-enclosed room and see everything closer, on the outside? please? i will never get used to this atmosphere." you pour politeness and charisma to the staffs around you, being directed to the proximity of the field and saluting the employees who pass through your path.

meet dominik — your szobo — instigates the nostalgic combination of detailed moments in which your thoughts display as photographic retrospectives. you're incapable to oppose the little enthusiastic laughs, fidgeting the rings between your fingers and avoiding possible suspicious glances from others. however, for you, this wouldn't actually work. the lives of you both are correlated, but different.

the training session is finished. clapping your hands and celebrating the performances, you greet the athletes and recognize some familiar people. nevertheless, reality slows down after those dark woody eyes capture through your soul. his arms tattoos are glorified by the sun's rays, the same illuminated smile is offered to you: that one you got during the very first time you saw him — instantly knowing he made you testimony the accuracy of freedom, catharsis and emotional amorous complement. that he'd be the one to introduce you what you never experienced, what you thought you'd never receive or deserve. what love truly is. when you were novices in your actual professions, not even imagining the future gifts of your unreal purposes.

"there you are!" intimately, dominik points at you, being reciprocated by vibrant nods and your old sort of secret — not that mysterious or serious — handshake. "még mindig emlékszel rá? (still remembering it?). you're a real one!"

"hogy tudnám elfelejteni? alábecsülsz engem. (how could i forget it? you're underestimating me)". your defensive actions demonstrate purposeful falseness. masking any sensitive, verbal or figurative communicative fragment from him is a difficulty that makes you give in over time. honestly, you never complain about this. it's like he wants to understand the factors and layers of you.

"a te kézfogás fickó. ne merészelj lecserélni engem. (your handshake man… don't you dare to replace me)". a shameless wink is send to you, butterflies acquiring space in your stomach.

"és hivatalosan is a szavamat adom rá. (and you officially have my word on it)." your gloss is pigmented against your fingers while you raise it up, displaying an oath, wondering if szoboszlai comprehends that his replacement in your life would be blasphemous.

"diplomata kisasszony, (miss diplomat)…" the hungarian fingerprints are shared and you recognize the sign to hold them, ready to perform your typical fashion icon moment. "gorgeous as always. go ahead! you know what to do!".

amusement surrounds you with the nickname's citation. although, you could feel some curious glances, from the outsiders, about the intimacy between you and him. "i appreciate, our top-class national bless…" you move your body in rotations to exclaim the outfit's characteristics, lifting your feet to show off the specificities of your heels. "how is your hair so well-groomed after sweating, though?" your arms cross and you raise an eyebrow in questioning, trying to hide your fascination.

"thank you, my number-one fan, but don't change the subject. finish our inside joke, c'mon!" dominik grabs his water bottle and spreads the cooling liquid on his forehead, wiping the glowing droplets across his face as he lifted his jersey high enough to exhibits his fortified abs.

your attention is directed to any surrounding scenery, throat being piked. szoboszlai pretends he doesn't notice, preventing to embarrass you.

"alright, alright! you've won, bájos úr… (mr. charming)". your final comment escapes as, practically, a whisper. you can't control the shy laughter, coupled with the considerable redness invading your cheeks.

"that's the secret to make my day!" using his tongue to reproduce a sharp noise, he matches your humorous reactions. "would you like me to show you the infrastructure changes? i'm just gonna take a shower!"

"i've already been granted a tour around here, but in case you insist…" during the dialogue, some athletes cross your space, wishing them good luck for the competition. your concentration on the activity is significant, at the point that dominik's silent admiration goes unnoticed.

"i mean, you know me! i'm gonna insist anyway, so…" he reaches your captivity, bringing you jollification.

"i'll rate you as a personal tour guide. now, go there!" jesting each other, you both exchange exaggerated reverences, like a challenge of who makes the most chaotic one.

────

walking around the area, various subjects are explored, informations entrusted. you ask and are updated about his ethereal younger sister.

portraits of the generations are framed. you magnifies his presence in celebratory pictures, dedicated to find him in the memories and achievements on that wall. pride shines from you and the hungarian finds it lovely.

"you know i'm a sucker for accents… they're much more than mere verbal characteristics, they're stories: life experiences, marks and scars. identities and cultural integrations." the topic is random. through generalized opinions, you're explaining conceptions and dominik is retaining mental observations. he exalts every scrap of your identity, like a faithful worshiper.

"basically, you're admitting being enchanted by my accent. i can see the stars in your eyes. a win is a win!" szoboszlai and his frequent attribute to physical touch, tickling your ears and playing with them. it doesn't bother you, actually: adoring the affection exuded by you and him. you feel like a little girl dealing with your one and only love.

"it's beautiful, how can you blame me? and hey, i know mine's making you grin too." he holds your arm, shivers running down your spine, the two of you being euphoric in the midst of your own enthusiasm.

"putting me against the wall? okay, hum… what were you saying before?" he's changing the subject and you have a natural wit to boo him. lifting his shoulders as a surrender, the hungarian focuses on the specific loose strands of his simple bracelet, which you get used to help him tie it again, willingly.

"trying to avoid the truth? fine! let me take care of you while i talk about my admiration towards globalization and communication. like, with every fiber of me…" you accept the conversation's direction and utter a 'voilà' towards the accessory's new appearance.

"that's why you're the best person i've ever seen doing this job." dominik compliments you, an act full of honesty.

"thanks a lot, mate. but which job? as your bracelet helper or my real one?" you provide tenderness, looking amused.

"i mean… both of them." szoboszlai chuckles, revealing courtesy by your continuous helpfulness.

"literally? because i know you know a lot of people. you're so young and already is the national team's captain." you nudge him in a form of tease. he's a starboy, it's undeniable.

"flattered! literally, thought. you were born for this, believe me." vulnerability collides to you, as his words are deliberated: emotions embracing you and warming your insides.

"dominik szoboszlai, my dear friend, you're gonna make me cry, right here. i'm sorry, i need to do it…"

innocent satisfaction builds strength over you and executes unthought-of approach to the tangibility of your gratitude — his colony enrapturing your sensitive olfaction — in the most out-of-control way. the sounds reach your hearing: a choir of angels singing hallelujah. he reciprocates the contact, laughing at your juvenile excitement. joining him and doing the same thing, harmonizing the triumph. in the separation of the touch, you both remain close to each other and the hungarian doesn't miss the opportunity to feel the softness of your side face, caressing the skin. appreciation and satisfaction invade your structure, delighting on the palm of his hand.

"just a dear friend? why are we pretending all this time?" dominik's reading you. the intimidation at the sight of him overhanging you is paralyzing. you don't usually back down, but in that instant — superior than your most repressed desires — your gasps are escaped.

"who is putting who against the wall now?" insisting and failing on your witty answers, shyness and uncertainty corrodes you.

"please, look at me! i'm not kidding anymore." his voice is questioning, intrigued — contradictorily vulnerable and calm — your rationality being fragmented, fragile.

"you know i'm not the kind of woman you're surrounding by, domi. i'm not an influencer, bikini model. i'm not a public figure. i don't live for the cameras and gossip platforms. i live to work hard. i didn't achieve any of this with some type of perk. my routine and your routine are based on traveling..." who could deny it? szoboszlai's always been all that you see. it's much more than a mere passion. your attraction to him is magnetic, intense, vivid. consequently, terrifying.

"i'm just asking for a chance, (your nickname). i don't lie when i say i've never met someone like you. i may be surrounded by a crowd and you'll still be the one to steal my attention, because nobody compares to you."

your eyelids are closed and the exhalation of his sigh penetrates your lungs with the numbing breath of life you've never experienced before. it's happening: the rare situation where thinking carefully about the pros and cons is unworthy, dumbness. your decision is made and the privilege's resolution unify your lips. the beginning demonstrates slowness and patience — the intensification through the concluded wait of the longed-for reality, transforming light and magical kisses into open mouths discovering each other and witnessing the endearment that both offer — hairs, necks, shoulders and waists captured.

"you're the first to create a meaningful presence in my mind and heart. i want you to be the last one too. i love you, kincs (my treasure). i'm finally brave enough to demonstrate it with no fears." dominik's forearm covers your upper torso. your back against his chest, noses resting on each others. rejoicing at the miraculous, incomparable circumstance.

"i love you, drágám (my precious). you're finally mine and it was so fucking worth waiting." his whisper: the living proof of celestial existence.

"how blessed we are…" intertwined bodies, coalesced essences. solitary melodies turning into the sweetest and most complete symphony.

[hannie-dul-set]

karma comes in the form of vehicular accidents and designer leather jackets. — [preview].

SYNOPSIS. when you’re nearly run over by a car, and said car happens to be a porsche 918 spyder, your broke ass knows better than to let this one in a million miracle slip by. 

PAIRING. shen quanrui x female! reader. GENRE. emotionally-stunted idiots to lovers, implied college! au, rich boy x not-so-rich girl trope but neither of them are normal! they’re both not well adjusted! mc is an actual scammer and ricky’s love language is throwing out exorbitant amounts of cash, romance, humor, angst if you squint but i prefer it when things are stupid, suggestive. WARNINGS. swearing, probably a number of illegal things, dubious medical practices, scamming, gold-digging, mild manipulation, a not very healthy dynamic at first but we’ll get there, more tba. WORD COUNT. teaser: 915 | full fic: est. 15-18k.

RELEASE DATE. within january, maybe. TAGLIST. send an ask/dm/reply to be added.

NOTE. hello riyangi nation i have another insanity-driven wip to offer. hopefully i go crazy again and write 4-5k a day like my last ricky longfic HAHAHHAHAH. this one has a bit more plot, a bit more seriousness, but still on the spectrum of unhinged!!! hope u enjoy.

preview under the cut.

IT’S A DOG EAT DOG WORLD OUT THERE. You’ve learned this lesson time and time again, ever since the early age of six— when your father got kicked out from his own start-up thanks to his greedy cousins, when you got in trouble for punching a classmate in first grade because he lifted up your skirt but the fucker was the grandson of your primary school’s dead, and when your high school scholarship got screwed over because “your parents unfortunately don’t support the school enough,” and you flipped off your home teacher all while calling him an ass-kissing, money-grabbing piece of shit.

Well, you were forced to transfer after that.

At least your new school didn’t base their scholarship grants on fucking PTA donations instead of grades.

From then on, you’ve learned that the only way to survive is to screw people over before getting screwed over yourself. There’s no point being nice. You can’t bother being a doormat to people who don’t even contribute a cent to your rent. You’re not wasting your smiles for people you can’t use.

Maybe it’s how you’ve grown to be so opportunistic, because the moment you and a friend were told that only one of you could get a full ride to Yonsei University— you didn’t think twice to cut him off. You stopped sharing your notes. You stopped studying together because why should you be nice to your competition? He was more well off than you anyway. His future doesn’t rely on handouts like it yours does. 

Bottomline, yes, you’re not the nicest person in the world. Sure, you screwed over some strangers opting to go to the same job interview as you by giving them the wrong directions. Maybe you cut yourself off from your parents the moment you turned legal when their debt started getting to them and they started relying on you to get out of the pitfall instead of pulling their own fucking weigh. Yes, you’re not a good person. You’re fully aware of that.

Which is why you can’t exactly say fuck you to god when karma comes to bite you in the ass via a car accident on your way to your weekend work shift.

The dead and quiet road you usually cross is now filled with noises of panic.

“Oh my god— dude! Call an ambulance!”

Your lungs hit asphalt and your head starts ringing. A pained hiss slips through gritted teeth. Something’s broken, you grunt, or at the very least not how it should be based on the sharp pain you’re feeling on the arm wedged between your body and the rough and dusty road. “Are they dead?!” you hear someone yell, followed by a car door swinging and footsteps running closer, yet your eyes remain squeezed shut from the blinding headlights and the aching of your entire body.

But it’s not the pain you’re dwelling on. No. It’s the hospital bills and the inevitable days off you’d have to take thanks to your god forsaken fucking luck.

The car should’ve just killed you on the spot.

“Are you okay?!”

However when you finally open your eyes and recognize the embodiment of your karma body slamming you into the ground in the form of a freaking Porsche, your worries suddenly get washed away into oblivion.

Holy shit, you’re fully conscious now. You’ve just hit the jackpot.

“O—oh, she’s awake, she’s awake! Gyuvin—”

Whoa.

There’s a person hovering above you. Rather, the person’s gold gilded necklace is dangling in front of your face. This is more than a jackpot. This is better that the fucking lottery.

“What—what do I do?”

“Is she responsive?!”

“U—uhm— are you okay?” Pretty boy that you assume is the one who nearly killed you is flitting his eyes in panic and is unsure with what to do with his hands. His face aside, the guy is decked out in designer clothing. You don’t miss the engravings on his jacket, the shiny glints of gold coiled around his panicked fingers. You’re not letting his chance slip away. You let out a grunt of pain and start folding into yourself. “Ahh, I don’t think she’s okay! What’s the number for 119?!”

Half acting. Half actually fucking hurting because ow. Maybe you did break something.

“I don’t know! Taerae, what’s the number for—”

“Are you two stupid?!”

Well shit. The pain stops paining because if they bring you to a hospital different from the one you have in mind, it’d be a loss for you. So you play it up even more. “A—ah, I think something’s broken,” you wince. Pretty boy drops his phone and tries helping you prop yourself up. 

“Crap. I think it’ll take too long if we call an ambulance,” says one of his companions behind him. “H—hey, do you mind if we just take you to the hospital right now?”

Now, this doesn’t sound safe. Around three men in their early twenties with very evidently no first aid experience delivering an injured woman to the hospital with what you think is a two-seater car is a recipe for disaster. You’re still on the dirty ground, arm definitely broken, with a rich guy looking like he’s about to start crying at any moment very hesitantly trying his best to help you sit up.

They’re waiting for your answer. And the answer is pretty obvious.

“Yes, please. Thank you!”

Because if you get even more injured along the way, that’ll simply be an extra bonus for you.

karma comes in the form of vehicular accidents and designer leather jackets. © hannie-dul-set, 2024.

[the-owl-tree]

The Cherith TawnyCrow situation is just the crown jewel of how hilariously bizarre the WC writing process sounds to outsiders. Like yeah it's ghostwritten, but by a whole team of people, some of whom are named/known and some of whom are just called The Story Team. They don't keep a series bible or spreadsheet (at least one of them admitted to using the fanmade Wiki as a reference) so they're always making mistakes and contradicting each other even for simple details like a character's eye color, let alone personalities and relationships and major plot events. Sometimes they intentionally contradict each other's writing due to personal bias (like Kate's vendetta against Squirrelstar because she feels the character "would have mocked me at school for being awkward"). And now we have one of the named ghostwriters hamfisting in her OTP after 20 years because the other named ghostwriters who wouldn't let her do it back then have finally all quit. Amazing

This got buried in my inbox sorry!!! watching the writing process unfurl and yet become more and more transparent is deeply funny. Was Cherith just waiting for her chance to get her ship canonized? Or did the editing team see that SquirrelCrow was getting popularity and tried to do Diet SquirrelCrow?

I almost wish there was some unfiltered view into the writing process where they just were like completely open about the pitfalls and struggles of writing. I feel like that interview with Kate was the closest we got to knowing what happens during the process of writing a modern day Warriors book, but I want more. How much control do the editors have? Did one of them suggest TawnyCrow? How much do they look at social media? If I got a job at the wiki, could I somehow influence the plot of Warriors? many such questions.

[thekenobee]

Hello, deer friend <3

Can you believe it's been six months since I fell head first into my Hermann Gottlieb obsession. Stared baffled-ly at the internet trying to figure out why the heck it isn't called Newtlieb (it is now I've decided). Realised the guy from that meme has like a name and a career and stuff. Realised one of those names is Peckham are you kidding me. Decided I wasn't interested in him unless Burn was also there. You know the story.

ANYWAY that's not what I came here to say. What I came here to say was, post-pitfall headcanons? What happens to our boys? Where are they now (like actually now, June 2025)? Or whenever. I do think it was rather neat of me to watch the film almost exactly when the events of the film were taking place. I'm so clever. Do you have different headcanons for a PRU-compliant universe vs. a pretending-PRU-never-happened-because-we-hate-that-for-them universe?

AHHHHH MY DEER, happy 6monthsversary!

I'm so happy you fell into the same 🐇 hole (Black Velvet Rabbits Band), it's such an absolute joy to have someone so special like you to talk about someone so special like Burn <3

Re: the question

I have seen. Things (in my mind, mostly) and I have read fics and What I think we could pass on as PRU compliant universe:

Hermann figuring out a way to sever the connection between the Precursors and Newt. Maybe by Drifring with Newt and empowering THEIR connection because Newton is not lost, no. We could see him beg Hermann to help him and who's more than capable of doing that than the love of his life, who waited for him for 10 years and who shared his most intimate moments and memories? Hermann eventually disconnects the Precursors from Newt, smashing tank with A.L.I.C.E. but not before getting the vital intel from her in his attempt to drift with the vile thing. Hermann carries both Newt and Himself in his mind everywhere he goes and the man who coded Jaegers can do ANYTHING.

If we were to pretend PRU doesn't exist, cuz it doesn't, however, I would go with this scenario:

Newton and Hermann never got separated. When I watched PRU for the first time it was such an abstract thing for me to imagine that Newton, lovely, messy Newton just. Left. Hermann for a cool job with a cool salary and cool clothes. Like. I was just given that on my plate when I didn't even order. He could never. After drifting, these two cannot stop rambling about k-biology, astronomy and why Star Trek TOS is a great show. Newton would take Hermann to the pub- No Newton, Black Velvet Rabbits is NOT the most amiable name for a band I could think of and I shall not entertain the idea of - yet he listens to the little man sing and after a couple of pints (German stuff) he even agrees to karaoke.

Newton also makes Hermann lose the grandpa style but not the suspenders. He loves them.

He's the one trying to figure out a way to stop Hermann's MS from progressing and that's his main job these days, apart from giving all the interviews and attending the lectures. He's a rockstar, dude

Newt also saw that Hermann's military haircut is reminiscent of his dreams of becoming a pilot, on their second date he takes him to Duxford Air Museum.

They continue to be rockstars-turned-husbands who defeated the kaiju, by Jove!

Oh lord I could go on and on. I'm afraid I drifted with so many fanfics we shared a bond

This was so lovely to reply to ❤️

[askchilchuck]

hello, chilchuck! I think you inspired me to get a job recently...something abt ur energy...then, I got an interview last week and I was hired! I start tomorrow!! ur like the patron saint of employment....so thank you! got any tips or advice for someone new to the workforce?

- (can I be 🥣 anon :3 )

Hey, not bad! What kind of work is it? You had a third party looked over your contract to make sure you’re being compensated fairly, right? Regardless, I’d make sure you only do what’s in your job description. If they ask for anything that’s not outlined, don’t do it unless they pay you more. Also, I know it’s too late now, but avoid anything that specifies “ miscellaneous tasks” or something similarly vague in there. Always get a breakdown of expected duties in writing before taking a job like that. They’ll include things like that to get you to do something you didn’t initially agree to. It’s a very common pitfall in contracts.

[thailandvisaa]

Marriage Visa in Thailand

For foreigners married to Thai nationals, the Thailand Marriage Visa (Non-Immigrant O Visa) provides a pathway to long-term residency. Unlike tourist visas, this visa allows for yearly extensions, work permit eligibility, and a potential path to permanent residency.

This in-depth guide covers the legal requirements, application process, financial obligations, renewal procedures, and strategic considerations for obtaining and maintaining a Thai marriage visa.

1. Understanding the Thailand Marriage Visa

The Non-Immigrant O Visa (based on marriage) is designed for foreigners legally married to Thai citizens. It permits stays of up to one year (with extensions) and avoids the need for frequent border runs.

Key Features:

✔ Initial 90-day entry, extendable to 1 year ✔ Renewable annually (if requirements are met) ✔ Eligibility for a work permit (separate application) ✔ Pathway to permanent residency after 3+ consecutive years

2. Eligibility Requirements

To qualify, applicants must meet strict legal and financial conditions:

A. Valid Marriage Registration

Marriage must be legally registered in Thailand (or certified at the Thai embassy if married abroad).

Same-sex marriages are not recognized for visa purposes (as of 2024).

B. Financial Requirements

Applicants must prove financial stability one of two ways:

Monthly Income Method

Minimum 40,000 THB/month (foreign-sourced income must be verified via embassy letter).

OR Thai spouse’s income (if combined, must meet 40,000 THB).

Bank Deposit Method

400,000 THB in a Thai bank account for at least 2 months before application.

Must be under the foreigner’s name (joint accounts are sometimes accepted but risky).

C. Additional Requirements

✔ Thai spouse must attend immigration interviews ✔ Home visit by immigration officers (to verify marital legitimacy) ✔ Updated Kor Ror 2 (marriage registration) and Kor Ror 3 (if amended)

3. Step-by-Step Application Process

Option 1: Applying from Abroad (Initial Non-O Visa)

Gather documents:

Marriage certificate (legalized if foreign)

Spouse’s Thai ID & house registration (Tabien Baan)

Bank statements or income proof

Apply at a Thai embassy/consulate (e.g., Savannakhet, Laos is a popular choice).

Receive a 90-day Non-O Visa, then extend in Thailand.

Option 2: Converting from Another Visa Inside Thailand

Possible if holding a Tourist Visa (TR) or Visa Exemption.

Must have at least 15 days remaining on current entry.

Submit documents at Thai Immigration Bureau (Chaeng Watthana or local office).

Extension of Stay (1-Year Renewal)

After the initial 90 days, apply for a 1-year extension at immigration:

Same financial proof required (bank deposit or income).

Re-interview with spouse (some offices require this annually).

90-day reporting mandatory (even with a 1-year extension).

4. Work Permit Eligibility

Unlike the retirement visa, the marriage visa allows work permits but requires: ✔ Employer sponsorship (must be a Thai-registered company). ✔ Non-restricted job position (varies by industry). ✔ Additional paperwork (WP3 form, company documents).

Note: Self-employment or freelance work is not permitted under standard work permit rules.

5. Common Pitfalls & How to Avoid Them

A. Insufficient Financial Proof

Bank deposits must be seasoned for 2+ months before renewal.

Embassy income letters (for foreigners) must be notarized annually.

B. Immigration Scrutiny of "Sham Marriages"

Home visits are standard in some provinces (Bangkok, Phuket, Chiang Mai).

Photos, joint bills, and witness statements help prove legitimacy.

C. Overstaying or Lapsed Extensions

Penalties: 500 THB/day, up to 20,000 THB + blacklisting.

Solution: Apply for extensions at least 30 days before expiry.

6. Long-Term Benefits: Path to Permanent Residency

After 3+ consecutive years on a marriage visa, foreigners may apply for permanent residency (PR), which offers: ✔ Indefinite stay without yearly renewals. ✔ Easier work permit approvals. ✔ Eligibility for citizenship after 5+ years (if meeting language & integration requirements).

PR Requirements:

Stable income (80,000+ THB/month recommended).

Thai language test (basic proficiency).

Clean criminal record (in Thailand and home country).

7. Divorce & Visa Implications

If the marriage ends:

Visa validity remains until expiry, but extensions are void.

Options: Switch to a retirement visa, work visa, or Elite Visa if eligible.

Overstaying risks deportation if no alternative visa is secured.

8. Expert Tips for a Smooth Process

✔ Choose the right immigration office (some are stricter than others). ✔ Keep updated bank records (avoid large withdrawals before renewal). ✔ Maintain proof of ongoing relationship (joint leases, family photos). ✔ Consult a visa specialist if complications arise (e.g., previous overstays).

Conclusion

The Thailand Marriage Visa offers a stable, long-term solution for expatriates married to Thai nationals. While the financial and documentation requirements are stringent, proper preparation ensures smooth renewals.

For those planning to stay indefinitely, the visa serves as a stepping stone to permanent residency and citizenship. However, applicants must remain vigilant about compliance, financial proof, and immigration interviews to avoid rejections.

[explore-miracle]

The Value of Professional Resume Writing

In today's highly competitive job market, a well-crafted resume is an essential tool for job seekers. It is the first impression an employer has of a candidate and often determines whether they get an interview. Despite its importance, many job seekers struggle to create an effective resume that highlights their skills, experience, and achievements. This is where professional resume writing services come into play. A professionally written resume can significantly enhance a job seeker’s chances of landing their dream job by showcasing their strengths in the most compelling manner.

This article explores the value of professional resume writing, the benefits it offers, and how it can impact career growth. By the end, you will understand why investing in a professionally written resume is one of the smartest career moves one can make.

The Importance of a Well-Written Resume

A resume is more than just a document that lists job experience and education; it is a strategic marketing tool that presents a candidate in the best possible light. Employers and recruiters often receive hundreds of applications for a single job posting, and they typically spend only a few seconds scanning each resume before deciding whether to consider the candidate further.

A poorly written resume can result in missed opportunities, even for highly qualified candidates. Common resume mistakes include:

Poor formatting that makes the resume difficult to read

Grammatical errors and typos that reduce credibility

Lack of clear focus or structure

Failing to highlight relevant accomplishments

Overuse of jargon or clichés that do not add value

Including unnecessary information that detracts from key strengths

A professional resume writer understands these pitfalls and knows how to craft a document that grabs attention while conveying the candidate's strengths in a clear, concise, and compelling manner.

Key Benefits of Professional Resume Writing

1. Expert Knowledge of Resume Trends and Best Practices

Resume writing trends change over time as hiring practices evolve. For example, applicant tracking systems (ATS) have become a critical part of the hiring process. These systems scan resumes for keywords and relevant content before they are ever seen by a human recruiter. A professionally written resume is optimized for ATS software, ensuring that it passes the initial screening process and reaches hiring managers.

Professional resume writers stay updated with current trends, including:

The best resume formats (chronological, functional, hybrid)

Industry-specific keywords to optimize ATS compatibility

Appropriate resume lengths based on experience level

Effective use of white space, bullet points, and fonts for readability

2. Stronger Personal Branding

A well-crafted resume goes beyond listing job responsibilities; it highlights a candidate’s unique value proposition. Professional resume writers use storytelling techniques to showcase career achievements and skills effectively. They craft powerful summaries and profile sections that immediately grab attention and differentiate the candidate from competitors.

For example, rather than stating "Managed a sales team," a professionally written resume might say, "Led a high-performing sales team to achieve a 30% revenue increase in one year, exceeding company targets."

By focusing on achievements and quantifiable results, a resume becomes a powerful branding tool that clearly communicates why a candidate is the best fit for the role.

3. Time-Saving and Stress Reduction

Writing a resume can be a daunting and time-consuming task, especially for professionals with extensive work experience or those transitioning to a new industry. Many job seekers struggle with articulating their achievements and determining what information to include or exclude. This can lead to frustration and delays in job applications.

Hiring a professional resume writer saves time and reduces stress. They know how to extract key details from a candidate’s work history and present them in the most impactful way. This allows job seekers to focus on networking and preparing for interviews instead of struggling with resume revisions.

4. Tailoring for Specific Jobs and Industries

A one-size-fits-all resume rarely works. Each job application requires a resume tailored to match the specific job description and industry standards. Professional resume writers customize resumes to align with the target role, ensuring that the most relevant skills and experiences stand out.

For instance, a resume for a marketing professional will emphasize digital marketing, SEO, and campaign management skills, while a resume for an IT specialist will focus on programming languages, certifications, and system implementation expertise. By tailoring resumes to specific industries and positions, professional writers increase the chances of a candidate securing an interview.

5. Improved Confidence and Professionalism

A strong, polished resume gives job seekers confidence when applying for positions. Knowing that their resume represents them in the best possible way helps candidates approach job applications and interviews with greater self-assurance.

Moreover, a professionally written resume demonstrates a high level of professionalism to potential employers. It shows that the candidate values their career and is serious about making a great impression.

6. Higher Interview and Job Offer Rates

Studies have shown that job seekers who use professionally written resumes receive more interview calls and job offers compared to those who write their own resumes. Employers are more likely to notice well-structured, visually appealing resumes that clearly communicate a candidate’s value.

A resume written by an expert increases the likelihood of making it past the ATS, catching a recruiter’s eye, and ultimately landing an interview. This gives job seekers a competitive edge in the hiring process.

How to Choose a Professional Resume Writing Service

Not all resume writing services are created equal. When selecting a professional resume writer, job seekers should consider the following factors:

Experience and Credentials: Look for writers with certifications such as Certified Professional Resume Writer (CPRW) or National Resume Writers' Association (NRWA) membership.

Industry Specialization: Choose a service that has experience writing resumes for your specific industry.

Customization: Avoid generic templates; ensure the service provides personalized resumes tailored to your skills and career goals.

Client Reviews and Success Stories: Check testimonials and online reviews to gauge client satisfaction.

Pricing and Turnaround Time: Compare prices and ensure the service delivers quality work within a reasonable timeframe.

Conclusion

Investing in a professionally written resume can be a game-changer for job seekers. It enhances job search success by improving resume quality, optimizing content for ATS, and effectively showcasing a candidate’s strengths and accomplishments. A well-crafted resume not only increases interview opportunities but also boosts confidence and career prospects.

Whether you are a recent graduate, mid-career professional, or executive, hiring a professional resume writer can be a strategic move that accelerates your career growth. In the competitive job market, standing out is crucial, and a professional resume ensures that your skills, experience, and achievements are presented in the best possible light.

Find your Expert >>

[jourdepluie91]

Ella Fitzgerald and Marilyn Monroe: Inside Their Surprising Friendship

The Hollywood starlet and jazz singer had a bond that defied the odds during a time of racial prejudice.

By Sara Kettler

When once asked about her favorite singers, Marilyn Monroe answered, "Well, my very favorite person, and I love her as a person as well as a singer, I think she's the greatest, and that's Ella Fitzgerald. Not only was Monroe a Fitzgerald fan, but she was also a friend who used her status as a Hollywood star to boost Fitzgerald's career. Their friendship would last until Monroe's untimely death. And even after Monroe had died, Fitzgerald remained grateful for the support the star had provided during her lifetime.

Monroe and Fitzgerald had many things in common, including traumatic childhoods

One reason for the connection between Monroe and Fitzgerald may have been the number of life experiences they had in common, beginning with their traumatic childhoods. Monroe grew up during the Great Depression unaware of who her father was and coping with a birth mother who was mentally unstable. She was moved among many different homes and was subjected to sexual abuse. Reflecting on her upbringing for a 1956 interview with Time magazine, she wondered, "How did I get through it?"

Fitzgerald was 15 when her mother's death in 1932 upended her world. Her stepfather became abusive, so she went to live with an aunt in Harlem. She left school to earn money, taking jobs, like brothel lookout, that skirted the law. Her truancy led to Fitzgerald being placed in a segregated reform school in upstate New York, where staff didn't hesitate to brutalize residents. The reformatory's last superintendent told The New York Times that during Fitzgerald's time there "she had been held in the basement of one of the cottages once and all but tortured."

Monroe was more open about her early life than Fitzgerald, who never wanted to discuss that period. Yet they each might have appreciated knowing someone who could understand some of that pain. Plus the similarities between Fitzgerald and Monroe didn't end with childhood: They'd both made early, unsuccessful marriages. And each had ultimately found success as a performer, while also encountering some of the pitfalls of stardom.

Monroe helped bring Fitzgerald's career to the next level

By the 1950s, Fitzgerald's enthralling singing voice had won her fans across the country. But the venues that hired her were often smaller clubs; some places weren't interested in having an overweight Black woman perform for them, no matter her talent. Fitzgerald reportedly once told her press agent, "I know I make a lot of money at the jazz clubs I play, but I sure wish I could play at one of those fancy places."

Movie star Monroe had spent hours listening to Fitzgerald's recordings (a music coach had recommended this to improve the star's own singing). In November 1954, she got to see Fitzgerald perform in Los Angeles. The two were soon friends, so when Monroe learned of Fitzgerald's inability to get a gig at the Mocambo, a famous L.A. nightclub, she decided to help.

Dorothy Dandridge and Eartha Kitt had already performed at the Mocambo, so Fitzgerald wouldn't have been the first African American to sing there. But the club's owner felt the heavyset Fitzgerald lacked the glamour to draw crowds. So Monroe approached him with a proposition — if he booked Fitzgerald, she promised to sit at the front of the house every night and to bring along other celebrities. Monroe made clear the amount of publicity this would garner, so the club owner agreed to hire Fitzgerald for a couple of weeks in March 1955.

During Fitzgerald's run, Monroe kept her word to sit up front, and Frank Sinatra and Judy Garland showed up on opening night. However, such celebrity firepower wasn't that necessary — Fitzgerald's shows sold out, and the owner even added a week to her contract. This successful engagement changed Fitzgerald's career trajectory. She later told Ms. magazine, "After that, I never had to play a small jazz club again."

Monroe supported Fitzgerald in battling prejudice

Following her success at the Mocambo, Fitzgerald got other jobs at big venues and also returned to the Mocambo. Yet not every location treated her equally due to the color of her skin — some expected Fitzgerald to enter through a side door or back entrance rather than the front.

When Monroe became aware of this, she again supported her friend. According to Fitzgerald biographer Geoffrey Mark, Monroe had traveled to Colorado to see Fitzgerald perform. Once there, she saw her friend ushered away from the front entrance, so Monroe refused to go inside unless both she and Fitzgerald were allowed through the front doors. The movie star got her way and soon all of Fitzgerald's performance spots were treating the singer with the respect she deserved.

Substance abuse became a barrier in Monroe and Fitzgerald's friendship

Monroe and Fitzgerald were friends for years. However, as Fitzgerald's longtime business manager revealed to Monroe biographer Lois Banner, Monroe's drug use kept the two from forging a deeper friendship.

Fitzgerald didn't drink or like cigarettes; she even shied away from songs that made reference to drugs. For her, an escape was watching soap operas when not on tour. But for Monroe, pills and alcohol were a way to cope with the stresses of her life and career. Her reliance on these substances deepened as the years went on until she died of a drug overdose at the age of 36 on August 5, 1962.

Fitzgerald never forgot how Monroe helped her career

Fitzgerald wasn't at Monroe's funeral. Joe DiMaggio, Monroe's second husband, had handled the arrangements, and he didn't want Monroe's celebrity friends and acquaintances to attend the small service.

However, Fitzgerald never forgot how Monroe had first helped her. In 1972, when she told Ms. magazine the story of Monroe's role in getting her that gig at the Mocambo, she noted, "I owe Marilyn Monroe a real debt."

[plethoraworldatlas]

trying to remember video essayist?

There was this one guy who did some great video essays that I just can't remember the name of.

He did a video I think about corporate diversity programs, I specifically remember him starting that video with a company video done by their diversity leader or something and later on in the video he reveals that that guy was basically hired by the company from basically the Pinkertons to shut down unionization and was rewarded by being given that new job and a six figure salary.

There was a video where he talked about "individualism and collectivism" and the ideals and failings of both; I particularly remember him interviewing other Asian amercians and people living in Asia about troubles they faced.

Another about younger generations desperate for community and the pitfalls of it

I can't remember much clearly. Please help if you know them

[unleashify]

How Unleashify Uses HR Insights to Craft Strategic Modules for Interview Success

Navigating the job market can be a daunting experience for students and recent graduates. The fierce competition, and standing out among a sea of candidates requires more than just qualifications. It requires a deep understanding of what employers are truly looking for and how to present oneself as the ideal fit. This is where Unleashify steps in, providing students with a unique edge by crafting interview preparation modules that are not just theoretically sound but strategically designed with input from HR professionals across different industries.

Here’s how Unleashify uses insights from HR to create strategically based modules that help students crack their interviews and land their dream jobs.

The Role of HR Insights in Building Effective Training Modules

The HR professionals at top companies are the gatekeepers of the hiring process. They understand the latest industry trends, skills in demand, and the qualities employers seek in potential hires. By tapping into the wealth of knowledge these HR experts possess, Unleashify gains valuable insights that go beyond generic interview preparation tips.

We regularly consult HRs from various sectors to gather information on:

Emerging Industry Trends: What new skills are in demand? Which competencies are considered essential for different roles?

Common Interview Pitfalls: What are the frequent mistakes candidates make during interviews, and how can these be avoided?

Role-Specific Expectations: How do expectations differ across roles such as marketing, finance, HR, and business analytics? What qualities are HRs specifically looking for in candidates applying for these positions?

Behavioral and Situational Questions: What kind of situational and behavioral questions do recruiters prefer, and how do they assess a candidate’s responses?

These insights help Unleashify stay up-to-date with the ever-evolving job market and tailor its modules accordingly.

How Unleashify Strategically Designs Modules Based on HR Guidance

Role-Specific Interview PreparationUnleashify offers tailored modules for different job roles and industries. Whether it’s marketing, finance, human resources, or business analytics, each module is designed to address the unique requirements of that field. By understanding the expectations specific to each role, students can prepare more effectively for interviews. The modules cover everything from key technical skills to relevant behavioral attributes, ensuring a comprehensive preparation.

Real-Life Scenario-Based TrainingHR professionals emphasize the importance of situational judgment and real-life problem-solving skills. At Unleashify, we incorporate scenario-based questions and case studies into our modules. These are based on real situations shared by HRs, giving students a chance to practice and refine their approach to answering complex questions.

Behavioral Interview TechniquesMany companies today focus on assessing candidates’ behavioral traits to determine if they are a cultural fit. Using guidance from HR experts, Unleashify’s modules include comprehensive training on answering behavioral questions using methods like the STAR (Situation, Task, Action, Result) technique. We teach students how to structure their responses to demonstrate competencies such as leadership, teamwork, adaptability, and problem-solving.

Feedback from HR on Mock InterviewsOne of the key ways Unleashify enhances its training is by arranging mock interviews where feedback is provided directly by HR professionals. This gives students a unique opportunity to receive real-world insights from those who actually conduct interviews. The feedback helps in refining their responses, body language, and overall presentation.

Continuous Updates Based on HR InputThe job market is dynamic, with employer expectations changing rapidly. To stay relevant, Unleashify constantly updates its training materials and modules based on ongoing feedback from HR professionals. This ensures that the content remains current and aligned with what companies are looking for, giving students an edge over the competition.

Strategic Structure of Unleashify’s Modules

Our modules follow a structured, step-by-step approach designed to build students’ confidence and competencies progressively:

Foundation Level — Skill Development and Understanding the BasicsWe start by helping students strengthen their fundamentals, including key technical skills and industry-specific knowledge. HRs provide input on the core competencies expected for each role, which helps us ensure that students are focusing on the right areas from the outset.

Intermediate Level — Role-Specific Preparation and Industry InsightsOnce the basics are covered, we move on to preparing students for the specific demands of the job they’re aiming for. HR insights help us create role-specific training that emphasizes industry trends, commonly asked questions, and required certifications or knowledge.

Advanced Level — Mock Interviews and Feedback SessionsThe final stage is where we put all the preparation into practice. We conduct mock interviews where HR professionals give direct feedback, helping students refine their answers and boost their confidence. These advanced sessions also cover strategic approaches to handling curveball questions and negotiating job offers.

Real Success Stories: How Unleashify’s Approach Works

Several Unleashify students have shared stories of their transformation from nervous interviewees to confident job applicants. By using our HR-guided modules, they gained a better understanding of what recruiters look for and how to present themselves effectively. With access to real-world scenarios, continuous feedback, and an ever-updating curriculum, our students were able to secure roles in top companies across various industries.

Why Partnering with Unleashify Makes a Difference

While traditional interview preparation often involves rote learning and memorization of answers, Unleashify’s strategic approach offers a real-world edge. By leveraging insights from HRs, we provide students with practical, in-depth preparation that goes beyond surface-level guidance. Our modules are designed to be adaptable, ensuring that students stay prepared for whatever the interview process throws at them.

Conclusion

Cracking the interview is more than just answering questions correctly — it’s about understanding what recruiters are looking for and presenting oneself as the ideal candidate. With Unleashify’s HR-guided modules, students are equipped with the knowledge and skills to do just that. Our continuous collaboration with HR professionals ensures that our content stays relevant, practical, and impactful.

Choose Unleashify for a strategically designed preparation experience that aligns with real-world expectations. Let us help you unlock your potential, confidently navigate the interview process, and achieve your career goals. For Enquiries: https://form.jotform.com/unleashify/unleashifyenquiry

#Unleashify #CareerSuccess #MBAstudents #InterviewPreparation #PracticalSkills #Networking #CareerGuidance #MBA #BBA #BCOM #MCOM #WORK #JOB #WFH #Hiring

[induspect1]

Let’s delve into the art of using the right words to excel in your interview and eliminate any potential pitfalls. Crafting your responses with carefully chosen language can make a significant difference in how you’re perceived by the interviewer. Understanding which terms and expressions to use—and which to avoid—can greatly enhance your ability to communicate your qualifications and make a compelling case for why you’re the ideal candidate for the job. #Induspect

[wishresume]

Crafting a Compelling Resume: Strategies for Success

Introduction

In today's competitive job market, a well-crafted resume is more than just a summary of work experience; it is a strategic tool designed to capture the attention of potential employers and secure job interviews. This paper explores the essential components of an effective resume, offers practical strategies for writing one, and highlights common pitfalls to avoid.

DownLoad:https://wishresume.com/resumetemplate_1.html

I. Understanding the Purpose of a Resume

A resume serves as a marketing tool that showcases an individual's qualifications, skills, and experiences to potential employers. Its primary purpose is to:

Highlight Relevant Skills and Experience: A resume should emphasize the candidate's qualifications that align with the job requirements.

Demonstrate Professional Growth: It should reflect the candidate's career progression and accomplishments.

Capture Attention Quickly: With hiring managers often spending only a few seconds on an initial resume review, the resume must grab attention immediately.

II. Essential Components of a Resume

Contact Information

Content: Name, phone number, email address, and optionally, LinkedIn profile or personal website.

Best Practices: Ensure accuracy and professionalism. Use a professional email address and provide up-to-date contact information.

Summary or Objective Statement

Content: A brief statement at the beginning of the resume that outlines the candidate’s career goals or provides a summary of their professional background.

Best Practices: Tailor this section to align with the job being applied for. Focus on what you can offer to the employer rather than what you hope to gain.

Work Experience

Content: List of past jobs, internships, or relevant experiences, including company names, job titles, dates of employment, and key responsibilities or achievements.

Best Practices: Use bullet points for clarity. Start each bullet with a strong action verb and quantify achievements where possible (e.g., “Increased sales by 20%”).

Education

Content: Academic qualifications, including degrees earned, institutions attended, and graduation dates.

Best Practices: Include relevant coursework or honors if applicable. For recent graduates, education may be listed before work experience.

Skills

Content: Specific abilities or competencies relevant to the job, such as technical skills, language proficiency, or soft skills.

Best Practices: Align skills with those mentioned in the job description. Highlight both hard and soft skills.

Additional Sections (if applicable)

Content: Certifications, professional affiliations, volunteer work, publications, or awards.

Best Practices: Include sections that add value to the resume and support the candidate's application for the specific role.

III. Strategies for Writing an Effective Resume

Tailor Your Resume

Customize the resume for each job application by aligning your skills and experiences with the job description. Use keywords from the job posting to pass Applicant Tracking Systems (ATS).

Use Action Verbs and Quantify Achievements

Strong action verbs like “developed,” “led,” or “achieved” make a resume more dynamic. Quantifying achievements (e.g., “Managed a team of 10”) provides concrete evidence of your impact.

Keep It Concise and Focused

Aim for one to two pages, depending on your experience level. Avoid including irrelevant information and focus on the most impactful details.

Maintain a Professional Format

Use a clean, professional layout with consistent fonts and formatting. Ensure there is enough white space for readability and use bullet points for lists.

Proofread and Edit

Carefully proofread the resume to avoid grammatical errors and typos. Consider having a mentor or colleague review it for feedback.

IV. Common Pitfalls to Avoid

Overloading with Information

Including too much information can overwhelm the reader. Be selective and focus on the most relevant experiences.

Using Generic Templates

Generic templates may not effectively highlight your unique qualifications. Customize your resume to reflect your personal brand.

Exaggerating or Misrepresenting Information

Ensure all information is accurate and truthful. Misrepresentation can damage credibility and lead to negative consequences.

Neglecting the Design and Layout

A poorly designed resume can detract from the content. Use a professional and easy-to-read format.

Conclusion

A resume is a crucial element in the job application process, serving as a first impression of a candidate's professional capabilities. By understanding the essential components, applying strategic writing techniques, and avoiding common mistakes, candidates can create compelling resumes that enhance their chances of securing job interviews. Crafting an effective resume requires careful attention to detail and a clear focus on aligning one's qualifications with the job at hand. In the end, a well-prepared resume not only opens doors to opportunities but also sets the stage for a successful career journey.

[aafrillia]

CHAPTER 2: MOOD PITFALLS TO WATCH OUT FOR (Pt. 2)

A summary of the book Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before? by Dr. Julie Smith

In my previous summary, we discussed how our feelings affect our behavior which lead to a more vicious cycle. Now we’re going to talk about thought biases that we generally experience since our thoughts and feelings go both ways.

Thought biases are more likely to appear when we’re feeling unwell emotionally. To simplify, thought bias is our mind’s way of thinking in a simple and quick manner to process and interpret information based on our prior experiences and views. This way of thinking would likely distort our understanding in thinking that can result in making bad decisions and mistakes. Thus, we have to understand and notice these thought biases so we could limit their power over our mind.

Here are several thought biases we have to learn:

Mind Reading

“Someone just laughed my way. I must look funny.”

“I must be so boring that they left me on read.”

We tend to spend much of our time making guesses about what others think and feel. Those thoughts likely happen when we’re struggling with our emotions. To ease those uncomfortable feelings, we tend to need constant reassurance; however, when the reassurance is lacking, we assume those thoughts are true.

Overgeneralization

Have you ever felt that everything seems to be wrong one thing after another? That is what overgeneralization bias feels like. You see one bad thing as a sign that the other thing will also go wrong.

For example, you might think your relationship would never work after one bad breakup. Or, you fail a job interview and assume you would mess up the next one too. You just feel hopeless and don’t see any point of trying again. Not only in this kind of situation, something trivial like a spilled milk in one morning could also affect your feelings for the rest of your day. It’s normal to have those thoughts, but it’s not helpful to dwell on them. Doing so only adds to your pain and worsens your low mood. 

Egocentric Thinking

Different strokes for different folks. We humans have different ways of doing and seeing things. That’s what the saying above means. Having different opinions and perspectives is normal. However, we find it kind of hard to accept that when we’re not feeling at our best.

We tend to set our own rules for others and then feel hurt in the process when they don’t meet our expectations. For example, you are someone who is always on time; and one time you have a meet-up with your friends, but they come late for some reason. It’s inevitable, but doesn’t it sour your mood? It feels like your friends aren’t taking the meeting seriously, which can be frustrating.

This definitely worsens our mood further and makes us less considerate towards others, even more so disrupting our relationships. At the end of the day, we cannot control the uncontrollable and inevitable.

Emotional Reasoning

Thoughts are not facts, and the same goes for feelings. That’s what Dr. Smith wrote in her book. We have the tendency to use what we feel as evidence for something to be true, even when there might be plenty of evidence suggesting otherwise.

Have you ever felt lacking in confidence despite knowing that you’ve worked so hard to achieve something? That’s your emotion talking; what you feel is more powerful and intense than other facts lay in front of you, which becomes fuel for your low mood.

The Mental Filter

You know what? When we believe something, we tend to struggle to let go of that belief. That’s how our brain works; easy and quick thinking. So you’re more likely to accept any information that supports your belief, while ignoring anything that challenges it. In other words, we believe what we want to believe.

Musts and Shoulds

In the era where trends are becoming a lifestyle, it’s inevitable that we desire to follow them. However, it becomes overwhelming when the trends are perceived as something compulsive or a must, like a standard of living. We feel the need to do it, even though it may not be in our best interest. Sometimes these trends can be unrealistic, which affect our emotions badly at the end of the day when we can’t live up to them. This doesn't just apply to trends; our societal expectations also contribute to our relentless pursuit of perfection.

All-or-Nothing Thinking

Good or bad, right or wrong, winner or loser, success or failure, beautiful or ugly. Only two sides that our minds lead us to believe, simply because it’s easier. This absolute or extreme thinking is also called black-and-white thinking. This type of bias never leaves room for the grey areas that are often closer to reality.

When we have the tendency to think in black-and-white, it may be difficult to think about the complexities of situations we or others are in; which are the grey areas we should consider as other variables in the outcome. However, if we’re stuck with this kind of extreme thinking, we’ll feel vulnerable to more intense emotional reactions.

Now you may realize that you might’ve had these thought biases at some point in your life. So what did you do with them? Did you just go along with those unhealthy thoughts, or did you try to stop them? Either way, it’s better if you can acknowledge them for what they are; biases.

Well, I bet it’s not easy, as we experience everything at the same time. We can’t just pick a thought to observe it clearly. Thus, Dr. Smith provides some ways to help us to spot thought biases.

As we experience high emotion states, it’s unlikely that we can spot thought biases. Therefore, it’s better to just step back for a while until our emotions are stable. When it passes, we can build our awareness by looking back at our thoughts.

We can start keeping a journal which focuses on specific moments, both in positive and negative ways. This includes several aspects such as your thoughts, feelings, behaviors, and physical sensations. Once you’ve done writing those, you can track your thoughts and see if they might have been biased at the time.

We can also directly write down using language that helps us get some distance from those thoughts and feelings so we can see them as experience rather than absolute truth, such as I am having thoughts that… or I am noticing these sensations. 

If we have someone we can trust and confide in, we can share our thoughts with them and ask them for help to spot the thought biases we have. Of course, this option requires a very good relationship; that person must be accepting, respectful, and supportive of our efforts to change and grow.

The last is to start practicing mindfulness. This practice helps us to pay attention to our thoughts and feelings without judgement.

The gist is don’t buy into our thoughts easily. It’s better if we stop for a while and see what they are and consider alternatives by doing some practice that we find helpful for ourselves.