#John x Jamie

[userkayjay]

John & Jamie + hands

Outlander 3.03 | 3.04 | 7.02

[littlecrabbs]

[saltybenchday]

Jamie returns to John's room after their conversation unable to bear the idea of separation and in doing so realizes what he'd been looking for all along.

Jamie/John, E, Words: 5,058

He didn’t even know why he’d gone to John’s room in the first place. He knew they ought not to see each other, let alone speak in private. It could certainly get the both of them into a great deal of trouble. 

But he’d not been able to draw a full breath since seeing John on the street that day...

Keep Reading

[lord-jen-grey]

Do You Feel Yourself Content?

Claire lies in bed near where Jamie and John are having an affectionate late night game of chess. Claire ruminates on John and Jamie’s relationship, stewing in jealousy and insecurity, causing her to act out with petty impulsivity…but she wasn’t expecting her actions to lead to revelations about life, and more importantly, herself.

Explicit - MMF

OT3 Jamie/John/Claire

Words: 4,316

Canon-divergent

1-shot

1st person past tense; Claire’s perspective

Mostly book inspired, except John looks like DB

Part of the Time is Never Planned series and the BangsGiving 22 collection.

[blakeswritingimagines]

You Asking For A Kiss

Quinn Hughes: He would blush slightly at this proposal and give a small smile as he would be somewhat surprised, but he would certainly agree to such a request. He would gently place a hand on your cheek and slowly lean in to kiss you.

Jack Hughes: He'd give you a smirk, grabbing you gently on the waist. His chest would press against yours. He'd lean down, his eyes locked on your own. "Is that really all you want?" He'd say teasingly as his breath would gently brush against your lips.

Luke Hughes: He would pause for a moment, a tad bewildered and a bit pink in the face, before he would smile warmly at you and close the distance between you. He would cup your face in one of his large hands, letting his thumb brush your skin before he would lean forward and meet your lips with a kiss. With a soft, slow press of his lips against yours, his eyes closed and his brain empty of conscious thought.

Nico Hischier: He is taken aback for just a moment out of surprise at your request, before smiling warmly. "Of course, you don't even have to ask love." He leans in and places a soft, lingering kiss on your lips.

Timo Meier: If you asked him for a kiss he would likely smile or chuckle a bit before saying "Of course, why ask?", pulling you closer, and giving you a few short but sweet kisses. He's usually pretty open to giving you affection unless you're in the middle of an argument or something.

John Marino: He would first turn to you slowly then take a step closer to you, making the distance between you as close as possible. Once you were standing only a few feet apart, he would place his hands on your waist, pulling you closer to his body. As your faces came together, he would smile gently and lean in, connecting your lips in a gentle yet passionate kiss.

Kirby Dach: He would gently take your face in his hands and look into your eyes, his gaze filled with affection and a hint of shyness. He'd then lean in slowly, his lips hovering just millimeters from yours, giving you the chance to back away if you wanted to. As he closed the gap, his touch would be gentle and tender, your lips meeting in a soft, lingering kiss.

Juraj Slafkovsky: He'd probably do a double-take to make sure he heard you right. Then, he'd get a shy smile on his face and his cheeks would turn slightly pink. Finally, he'd nod yes and say, “Of course.”

Arber Xhekaj: He'd probably be a bit flustered at first but he'd eventually nod, giving you a little smile. If you're the one initiating it, he'd probably be the one to pull you in for the kiss, wrapping his arms around your waist to hold you close to him.

Cole Caufield: His gaze is soft and filled with adoration. He would slowly lean in, his lips slightly parted as he approached, his heart racing in anticipation of the moment. Once your lips connect, he would feel a rush of emotions, the world around you melting away as you share this intimate moment together.

Trevor Zegras: He would pause in pleasant surprise, his eyes widening a bit as he blinked. He would look you up and down, noting the way you were asking to be kissed. If you were close enough he would close the distance between you and give you a gentle, loving kiss on the lips, placing his hands on your hips, and holding you there for a moment before pulling back. “Like that?” He asked, his tone warm and teasing.

Jamie Drysdale: He gets a bit flustered, not expecting the question, then asks "Why are you asking that?" His heart would flutter and his cheeks would get flushed. He would then nod his head and lean in to give you a soft, tender kiss.

[itsnotgray]

gray’s fic recs

my tagging/recommendation system is a mess beyond the point of fixing, so i made a masterlist. (i’ll slowly be adding fics to this!)

- an asterisk is next to players who play for the ahl team of said nhl team

- if works focused on more than one person, they’re listed under the other people, but only tagged in the first one you see in the list.

- also, apologies if the links don’t work correctly, it is in fact my first time making a masterlist

NHL/AHL

Anaheim Ducks

Jamie Drysdale

hey roomie by @emaanemaa

- trevor and jamie threesome. that's right, that's all it took to get you to go read it.

Trevor Zegras

chameleon by @hischierhaze

- listen- if you're someone who, whether it be consciously or unconsciously, changes themselves and their personality for those around them, or you have a history of it- please read this. I promise you, you won't regret it.

now that we don't talk by @sc0tters

- it's a toxic relationship with trevor, of course I'm gonna eat it up (she might end with trevor... or she might not. you'll never know if you don't read it.)

hey roomie by @ emaanemaa (fic linked above under jamie)

the penalty box series by @starsandhughes

I- if you're not already keeping up with this series... where have you been? every update is laugh out loud hilarious, and leaves you itching for more.

cruel weather- apart of the penalty box series by @starsandhughes

cruel weather gets it's own link because of the amount of emotional damage this inflicted upon me.

Arizona Coyotes

Boston Bruins

Buffalo Sabres

Devon Levi

like it very much by @jackhues

there aren’t many devon fics (which there totally should be), but the way i squealed when i read this one. further affirmed the fact that i think he’d be the best bf.

Calgary Flames

Nikita Zadorov

that scar hurt by the way by @swissboyhisch

- listen…. i’m the farthest thing from a flames fan, and can wholeheartedly admit it was an adorable read.

Carolina Hurricanes

Chicago Blackhawks

Colorado Avalanche

Columbus Blue Jackets

Adam Fantilli

to you, my adamo by @hischierhaze

- it's adam's birthday + his debut, can you blame me for crying?

his return by @hischierhaze

-this made me cry. but in making this, i'm convinced anything kei writes with the fantilli brothers makes me want to cry from either just how sickeningly sweet it is, or of course, sadness.

tiny dancer au by @letsgetrowdy43

god when i say sunny and adam have my heart- i mean it. they’re sososo special to me.

Dallas Stars

Wyatt Johnston

our song by @lovinbarzal

hands down one of my favorite wy jo fics/au’s. it’s wyatt x a barzal sister, a pairing i wouldn’t have thought of, but works so well!

Detroit Red Wings

Edmonton Oilers

Florida Panthers

Matthew Tkachuk

waking up in vegas by @doc-pickles

- matty t x hughes!sister is a dynamic i didn’t know i needed.

Mackie Samoskevich*

perfect girl by @dmercer91

- this had me feeling things like no other... a big hint as to why? she's shared.

Los Angeles Kings

Alex Turcotte*

who does it better? by @harry-hollands

one of the cutest social media au’s in a while (technically has two parts, but they don’t have to be read together)

Minnesota Wild

Montreal Canadiens

Kirby Dach

here with you by @sc0tters

- it's amber's writing + kirby, what's not to love? (if that's not convincing enough, maybe the line, "I will follow you to the ends of the earth," is.)

Nashville Predators

New Jersey Devils

Jack Hughes

timeless by @babydollmarauders

- if I hadn't originally read this in the middle of the grocery store, I can almost guarantee that I would've cried from just how heartwarmingly adorable this is.

out by @babydollmarauders

- equipment manager x jacky boy- aka a trope I never knew I needed, but now crave after reading this.

ballad of a homeschooled girl by @babydollmarauders

- hands down one of the best pics I've probably ever read in terms of conveying emotion. my stomach was in knots the entire time, attesting to just how realistic the writing is.

never grow up by @aliaology

- i'm sorry but you're not human if you don't get even the tiniest bit emotional at any fic with "never grow up" as the song. BUT A FIC WITH THE BROTHERS? this rendered me emotionally unavailable for a solid 20 minutes.

medía management au by @babydollmarauders

the media management au is an ongoing series staring mr jack hughes and his lovely girl, dove! the updates always bring a a smile to my face, and more than likely make me laugh out loud.

4:41 am by @sweetestdesire

listen, as much as i adore brynn’s smut like no other, her fluffy, soft and sweet fics just do something to me. she writes them so detailed, and consistently has me craving for soft moments with a significant other (a significant other i do not have)

John Marino

stay for a while by @sc0tters

- when i talk about made me feel things, i mean it. amber never fails in writing panty-dropping smut, while also having an thought-out plot.

Luke Hughes

welcome back by @leaentries

- this literally made me swoon. a protective lukey- what's not to love?

nobody's love by @eyesthatroll

- my heart was in my throat while reading, and my emotions were all over the place. regardless of how emotional it left me, it was amazing and deserves all the love.

never grow up by @ aliaology (fic linked under jack)

- older hughes sister watches her brothers grow up + never grow up = tears

summer aches by @starry-hughes

- this fic makes me want a luke to take care of me when i get headaches, triggered by heat or not

what’s not to like? by @starry-hughes

- queen ellen and jimmy are a little apprehensive of you…

jack’s best friend by @lvrzegras

okay listen- any of the brothers x their best friends is great, but jack’s best friend x luke… it just hits different, yk?

Nico Hischier

I never could've seen you coming (I think you're everything I could've ever wanted) by @writingonleaves

- this is probably as close to a literary masterpiece as a fanfic posted on tumblr will ever get

will you take a moment? promise me this (that you'll stand by me forever) by @writingonleaves

- listen- it's apart of the universe she began in the fic above. I have the fic linked under nico (because the oc eventually ends up in a relationship with nico, as seen in the part above), but this is sososo found family heavy. if found family is your trope, then this is your fic

New York Islanders

Mat Barzal

it's nice to have a friend by @youunravelme

- put me through the emotional wringer in the best way possible.

winnie martin's favorite person by @ilyasorokinn

- god- i cannot even begin to describe how cute this is. all i can say, is that I need more pictures of barzy with kids... for science of course.

New York Rangers

Ottawa Senators

Philadelphia Flyers

Pittsburgh Penguins

Sidney Crosby

she was the (red) devil by @crosbyscurls

- hockey meets f1 is already a dream combination… but sid x f1? absolutely amazing

San Jose Sharks

Seattle Kraken

St Louis Blues

Tampa Bay Lightning

Toronto Maple Leafs

Vancouver Canucks

Quinn Hughes

these michigan summers by @lukevangelista

i feel like the only way your not aware this series exists, then your new here. because if you haven’t read this, where have you been? this is for sure one of my top three series’ on tumblr, finished or unfinished. will in fact, forever have my heart. (currently unfinished)

the sun to my moon by @ghostfacd

this fic is part of an au! i highly, highly recommend checking it out- quinny + a grumpyxsunshine trope, what’s not to love?

never grow up by @ aliaology (fic linked under jack's name)

- older hughes sister watches her brothers grow up + never grow up = tears

Vegas Golden Knights

Washington Capitals

Dylan Strome

it's never too late to come back to my side by @lukevangelista (a series)

- one of my recent favorites. particularly geared towards those who think back on old friendships (...and constantly overthink on whether you should reach out. spoilers- it's never too late)

Winnipeg Jets

NCAA

University of Michigan

Luca Fantilli

missing you, quietly by @bitchinbarzal

- emotional torture in the best way possible. i re-read a concerning amount

i lost him by @hischierhaze

- made me cry- but in a good way

baby 101- name reveal by @hischierhaze

- it's dad!luca... yeah that's right, now that you have that cute thought in your head, you kinda have to go and read it

I tell you that I think im falling back in love with you by @writingonleaves

- this fic is sososo special to me for so many reasons- and I think you should totally read this fic to figure them out... just saying

opposites attract au by @dmercer91

this is a link to the head anons for the au- but please go read this sweet au. luca and landen are one of the sweetest pairings.

Nick Moldenhauer

sundays are for textiles by @drewsbuzzcut

- super cute read, and it's apart of an even cuter au

all american lace by @drewsbuzzcut

- also apart of that super cute nick au she has- but this part was not so cutesy (it was at the end). had me on the edge of my seat, and tears building in my eyes. the type of angst you physically feel- but with the type of ending that makes up for it (trust me, it does!)

Mark Estapa

icy roads by @nicohischierz

the simplest explanation i can offer is that this broke my heart- but i loved it anyway!

Boston College

Gabe Perreault

princess!gf x gabe perreault by @yankstrash

- these two are on my mind at least three times a week. i aspire to become amelia- aka find someone who is as down bad for me as gabe is for “his meels”

[python-nebula]

The four horsemen of throuples that should've been canon that contain an assertive woman with a strong british or spanish accent, and two guys who bicker a lot - one of which has dark hair - and they all love each other a ton + work together to help the world (whether that be through time travel, football, podcast crime-solving, or vampire hunting)

[fanficforlife]

Chapter Eight

Kayce was wrapped around you, pulling you back against his chest as you reached to turn your alarm clock off. "Mmm, no."

"Yes. We both have to go to work." You groaned as you rolled onto your side to face him. 

When he stretched, his back cracked. "I love waking up next to you but your bed is too small. My bed's bigger." 

"Your room is right next to your dad's."

"So?" 

"You know what usually happens when we stay in the same bed."

"He won't care."

"I know but it's your dad."

"He knows I've been sleeping down here with you a few times a week and I'm pretty sure he knows we're not just sleeping most nights." He tickled your side and you squirmed.

"Stop." You giggled. His fingers stilled so you stopped wiggling. "I know that he knows we're not just sleeping but...I don't know...it would just be kind of weird having sex in the room next to his while he's in there."

"Yeah, I guess you're right." He pulled your naked body against his. "Plus, I like hearing you moan my name so I'd hate for you to have to be too quiet." 

"Kayce." Heat crept across your cheeks. 

The smirk you loved formed. "Not quite like that."

"No? Well, this might help a bit." You pushed him onto his back and straddled him. 

His hands ran up your thighs while his eyes traveled up your body. "Fuck, you're perfect."

Blush stained your cheeks and you leaned down to kiss him. "So are you." You smiled against his lips as your hand went between you. 

"Fuck, baby." He moaned when you sunk onto him. 

You began to ride him, your eyes never leaving his. His hands gripped your hips before one slid up your stomach and palmed your breast. He pinched your nipple and you clenched around him. "Kayc." You ground against him. 

He let out a ragged breath and his hand quickly left your hip so he could sit up. Your lips crashed together as he effortlessly lifted you so you could wrap your legs around him. He pushed back into you and the two of you began grinding against each other, hitting the right spot over and over again. His arm slid around you and up your back, holding you close, while his other hand dug into your hip. 

"Mmm." You moaned. One of your arms wrapped around his shoulders, your other hand slid into his hair. 

"Baby." He groaned and you knew he was close. You nodded breathlessly, right there with him. "Come for me, Letty." And, you did, moaning his name. He was seconds behind you, watching while you came undone in his arms. 

You both collapsed, a thin layer of sweat covering your bodies. "Wow." You said between gasps. 

"Yeah. You are without a doubt the most amazing woman in the world." He rolled you onto your back and propped himself up on his elbow to look down at you. His perfect smile donned his face. "Seriously, how can every time with you be even better than the last?"

"I guess we were just made for each other."

"You're god damn right we were." He leaned in and kissed you long and slow. When he pulled back you could see a hint of concern in his brown eyes. 

"What?" Your hand came up and brushed his hair off his forehead. 

"Are you still good with...everything?"

You knew he was referring to sex and everything that went along with it. "Yes, I'm good."

"I try to be gentle but sometimes I can't help it because you're well, you. I don't hold you too tight or push you around or-"

"Kayce," you smiled up at the kind, caring man you loved, "everything you do is perfect. He is the furthest thing from my mind when I'm with you. And, to be honest, I kinda like it when you take charge and manhandle me a bit." 

"I don't hurt you or-or scare you?"

"No. I know you would stop if I told you to and I know you wouldn't hurt me. It's just me and you every time we're together. whether it's you grabbing me to give me a kiss while I'm not paying attention or when we're doing more than kissing." A smile finally pulled at his lips and you rose to kiss it. "I love you."

"I love you more." 

You giggled softly. "Come on. We need to shower and get dressed before Tate gets up." 

"Yes, ma'am." But, he didn't. He leaned back against the headboard and watched you stand up. "I am the luckiest man in the whole damn world."

Your hand reached for the sheet that was covering the lower half of his body and pulled it off the bed. "And, I am the luckiest woman in the world." You bit your lower lip before wrapping the sheet around your naked body. "Hurry up or I'll be done before you get in there." A sweet smile pulled at your lips before you opened the door and poked your head out, making sure the coast was clear before you dashed across the hall with the sheet draped around you. 

*****

"Ready, baby?" Kayce asked as the two of you stood inside the fence, next to his horse and a chestnut mare. 

"I'm ready." His eyes surveyed your face and you giggled. Your hands came up to rest on his chest. "Kayc, how many times have I gone riding with you? Lots. I don't even know how many times. And, every time you've shown me how to do it. You've taught me how to sit, how to stop, everything. I'm ready."

"Okay."

You rose to your toes and looked into his worried brown eyes. "You don't have to be nervous. I had the best teacher on the ranch. I'll be fine." Your lips pressed against his. "Let's go."

A smile finally formed on his rugged face. "Get your sexy ass up there then." He chuckled when your cheeks darkened. "God, you're adorable."

"Stop." You gave him a gentle shove before climbing up and settling onto the saddle. "Hurry up and get your sexy ass up there slowpoke."

"Jeez, woman. What am I gonna do with you?" He smirked at you while he untied your horse from the fence railing before working on his. 

"You have until we get to the meadow to figure it out." You smirked back at him before you got your horse walking, quickly turning it into a run. 

"Letty!" He yelled before jumping onto his horse and bolting after you. When he caught up to you, you slowed your mare to a walk. "What do you think you're doing?!" He brought his horse alongside yours and grabbed the reigns so you couldn't run off again.

"I told you I had the best teacher." 

"You could have fallen off." 

You looked over at him. "Kace, I'm not made of glass." 

"I know but you've never gone by yourself before." 

"I have actually." A mischievous smile formed. "When you've all gone out checking fences or moving cows, your dad's been showing me. We thought it would be fun to surprise you." 

"You almost gave me a heart attack."

"Sorry." A giggle escaped and he gave you a playful scowl. "Do you think Storm will be okay to ride soon? It's not that I don't love this one," you pet the mare's neck that you were riding, "but-"

"But, she's not yours."

"Will she be strong enough to ride or, after everything she went through..."

His hand let go of the reigns and squeezed your thigh. "She's stronger because of what she went through." You knew he wasn't just talking about your horse. "Storm's doin' really good. She's a hundred times better than when she first got here, she's strong enough now. Next time you take her out walking in the corral, I'll bring a saddle and we can see how she does with it." You smiled at him and he smiled back. "Wait a second. You said you had the best teacher at the ranch. Did you mean me or Dad?"

"Your dad obviously." 

A smirk tugged at the corners of his mouth. "Uh-huh. Well, since you're such a good rider, let me see what ya got." 

"Race you the rest of the way?" Before he could answer, you and the mare were off. 

*****

"Violet?" Tate's voice drifted outside to where you were sitting on the porch. "Violet?!" The door opened and he stuck his head out. "Vi- Oh, there you are."

"Hi." You smiled as he stepped outside, followed by his dad.

Kayce leaned down and kissed you. "Morning, baby. How did ya sleep?" He sat down in the empty chair next to yours before taking a drink from his coffee mug. 

"Uh, Morning. I slept well. How about you?" You eyed the bruises on his face. 

"It coulda been better." 

Because last night he slept in his bed, not yours. The only time you, did see him yesterday was in the morning and he didn't have the bruises then so he had gotten into a fight with someone between then and now. He could see your wheels turning and he quickly took another drink. 

"What are ya doin'?" Tate looked down at your lap, which was filled with photographs. "Did you take these?" 

"Mhm." You answered shyly. 

"Wow! You're really good."

Your cheeks started to return red from Tate's compliment. "Thanks, bud."

"Shit. Babe, he's right."

"Dad."

Kayce chuckled at his son's serious tone. "Right. Sorry. No swearing." He turned his attention back to you. "You didn't tell me you liked photography."

"I umm, I took pictures for the yearbook in high school and of places around town. The city used some in travel brochures, the newspaper printed a few of them, I even sold some prints but after high school...life happened and I stopped. Being here, it makes we want to again." You looked at Kayce and who had a soft, knowing smile on his and you smiled back. "So, what are you up to today? Tired of summer holidays yet?"

"No! School sucks." Tate scrunched his nose in disgust. "Oh! Guess what?!" 

"What?"

"At breakfast, Grandpa said that since Dad's been working better, that me and Dad can move into the foreman's house."

Your eyes left Tate and went to Kayce, whose cheeks were a light shade of pink from embarrassment. "Really? That's exciting."

"Yeah! Wanna come help me pack up my room? I just need my toys and books, and my clothes. Grandpa said there's empty boxes in the storage room. Oh, wait. Do you have to work today?"

"I finished my work for the week yesterday so I have a three-day weekend. So, yes, I can come help you."

"Yay! I'll go help Grandpa get the boxes." 

"I'll be there soon."

"Okay." 

When the door closed behind him, you set the photos on the small side table nestled between the two chairs. "So."

"So." He reached for your hand and gave it a gentle tug. You went over and sat on his lap. "Uh..."

I won't start with his black and blue face then. "I thought Rip lived in the foreman's house."

"He does-did. Dad said, well, you heard Tate." Embarrassment flashed across his features again. "I've been doing better. I umm, I still get angry sometimes. I would never hurt you though. Never." He added quickly.

"I know you wouldn't." Your hand rested against the side of his neck, your thumb ran across his jaw carefully avoiding his bruised skin.

"I was the foreman but not really. I didn't act like it. I would lose my temper or not pay attention. Then you came. I wanted to be better, someone who was good enough for you because I sure as hell wasn't before."

"Kayc, you don't have to prove anything to me."

"Yes, I did. When I started getting back on track, Dad put me back in charge. Rip was doing it before."

Your eyes searched his face. "It was Rip."

"How..."

"The way you said his name." Your fingers trailed up and down his forearm while he held you.

His eyes went to your hand. "He just...he thinks he's always right. Especially, since he's been Dad's right-hand man since before I graduated. Then with everything that went on after...Tate, the navy." He looked up at you sheepishly but relaxed when he was met with your soft, caring eyes. "There's a rule on the ranch, no fighting and if you want someone to fight, it's the foreman. I admit Rip's been helpin' me work my way back up but yesterday he went off about something I said or didn't do, I can't even remember because it was stupid. I got mad and we fought. At least everyone knows who to fight now."

So he won. "Are you okay? Does it hurt?"

"I'm good, baby."

"So, I can kiss you?" You smiled.

A smile finally formed on his rugged face. "Come here." His hand slid into your hair and gently pulled you in. When you parted, Tate was standing there grinning. Kayce chuckled. "I guess it's time to start packing."

"I guess so."

"I get Violet!" Tate quickly grabbed your hand and you stood up.

"What if I want her to help me?"

"You wouldn't get anything done because you would just be kissin' the whole time." 

A light shade of red stained your cheeks. "Okay. Let's go." You grabbed your pictures before ushering the giggling boy inside, with his dad on your heels. 

"He isn't wrong though," Kayce whispered next to your ear before kissing the side of your head. 

You gave him a playful shove. "Get to work." 

"Yes, ma'am." He winked at you before grabbing the last two boxes that were sitting at the base of the stairs.

*

The second you crawled into bed, Kayce pulled you into his arms and you immediately cuddled against his side. "Mmm." You hummed in contentment as you rested your head on his shoulder. "This is nice."

"Mhm." His lips pressed a kiss on your forehead. "Thanks for your help today, baby." 

"You're welcome. How does it feel to be in your own house?"

"It feels good, except for the fact that you're not in the same house anymore."

You giggled and tilted your head to look up at him. "I'm only what, a one minute walk away?"

"Yeah, but we've been in the same house for the last six months." He held you tighter when you curled in closer to him.

"It's hard to believe I've been here that long."

"Do you still like it here?"

"There's nowhere else on earth I would rather be." You stated after looking up at him. 

He leaned in and your lips met for a long, sweet kiss before you settled back into his arms. "How come you stopped taking pictures? He was a piece of shit but even he couldn't have denied that you were amazing at it."

"After high school, I was going to work for a year to save up some money then go to school for photography. When Nick and I started dating he was okay with it. When I got back acceptance letters from the schools I applied to it was a couple weeks before my Mom died. She really wanted me to go. She was always really supportive." A sad smile graced your lips at the memory of her. "After she died Nick said he didn't want me to go. He said he would miss me too much, and he couldn't go with me because he just started working. And, it was too soon after she died so I wouldn't be able to focus at school. I should stay and move in with him because I couldn't afford a place of my own. I could apply again next year and he could come with me. When it was time to apply again he said he couldn't get transferred yet because it was still too soon."

"He could've though?"

"Yeah. When I found out I got mad but he said he did it for me. He said it was because I wouldn't make it through school let alone do it as a career. I wasn't that good. He told me it was because he couldn't leave yet so he didn't hurt my feelings. Then he went on about how I didn't have to work because his family was rich...I stopped doing it after that."

"Baby."

"It's okay. Being with him brought me here." You placed your hand on his cheek. "And, being here, being with you, it makes me want to again." 

"He knew you were great at it, he just didn't want you to go because he was scared and jealous. If you want to go back to school for it, you should. I'm not going anywhere."

A smile pulled at the corners of your mouth as you tilted your head to look at him. "I'm perfectly happy doing what I am now. And, with Nick...I couldn't if I wanted to." He would find me...

"If you wanted to, I wouldn't let him anywhere near you."

"I know you wouldn't." Your heart swelled. The blanket slid around your waist as you left his side and climbed on top of him. You bent down, keeping your face inches from his. "I love you, Kayce."

"You have no idea how much I love you, Violet. " His hand slid into your hair and pulled you in. Your lips met for a slow kiss. The longer it carried on the steamier it became. After a few minutes, you both couldn't wait any longer. 

Your hand pulled his boxers down just as far as they needed to before pulling your underwear to the side. A breathy moan left your lips when you sunk down onto him. He reached up and pulled you back down to crash his lips into yours. His lips parted so his tongue could explore your mouth. You continued to ride him and it wasn't long until you were close. "Kayc." 

"Almost, baby." He gripped your hips and pounded into you. 

"Mmm." The heat pooling in your core began to build rapidly. "Oh, god." His movements began to get messy and you knew he was on the edge. You ground into him once more before you both came together. 

When you both came down from your highs, you collapsed next to him. His arms wrapped around you and tucked you against his side. "You could move in here. We've been spending more nights than not together lately anyway."

"Kayc," you shifted slightly so you could see his dreamy hazel eyes, "I love you and love spending the night with you but I think it should just be you and Tate here. I can still come and spend the night sometimes but moving in..."

He knew what you were thinking. "I know you're still scared that he's going to find you and you'll have to leave. You don't want to get too close." He moved onto his side to face you. His hand slid across your cheek and into your hair. "Violet, even if he does figure out that you're here, he is never going to get within a hundred feet of you. Everyone here will make sure of that. You're safe."

You nodded. "It's not just that." Your tongue slipped out and licked your dry lips. "You make me happy, happier than I have ever been. I'm scared of getting too close because if it ends, if we break up- I don't know what I would do without you and Tate."

"Baby, you are going to be stuck with me for the rest of your life." He stated firmly, his brown eyes pierced yours. You sniffed as tears welled in your eyes. A smile pulled at his lips while his thumb ran across your cheek. "I love you more than I ever thought was possible." Your lips met for a thorough, heartfelt kiss before he pulled you flush with his body. He swallowed your moan as the kiss became more passionate. 

A sensual giggle left your lips when he climbed between your legs. You hooked your legs around his waist, pulling him closer.

"I can never get enough of you." 

"Right back at you." 

He smirked down at you before attacking your neck. 

*****

Kayce made you wait in the truck while he got out and came around to your side, opening the door for you. 

"Thank you." You smiled. 

His hand immediately wrapped around yours. "I know going to a bar when we both don't drink seems stupid but they have the best burgers around. And, I know they're one of your favorites." 

"You're the best." A giggle left your lips as you wrapped yourself around his arm. When you got to the entrance he let go of your hand and opened the door for you before placing it on the small of your back and guiding you inside. "I thought the ranch was cowboy, country-ish but this place..." 

There were wood beams and posts, the bar was wood and the walls were clad in wood paneling. That's where the similarities between the lodge and the bar ended. Bottles of beer were put in metal pails with ice and served to you, there were neon signs with the names of popular beer brands. A large American flag hung on the wall. The floors were sheets of plywood and had the occasional piece of straw lying around that had been brought in by the cowboy boots that adorned everyone's feet. 

"Yeah, it's nothin' fancy. We couldn't come here before because if we did come to town, Tate's been with us. I should've picked a better place for our first date off the ranch but you don't like fancy and food-"

"Food definitely wins." You finished with a grin. "Speaking of which, you mentioned something about burgers."

Kayce chuckled and slid his arm around your waist. "Let's find a table." As you moved through the crowded building towards a few empty tables, he kept pulling you closer and closer to his side. 

You assumed it was because it was date night but even after you ordered your food, he sat on your left instead of across the small square table you were at. He also kept moving his chair closer and touching your hand or arm. Not uncommon since he was touchy-feely but not while his shoulders were squared. It wasn't until a man with a plaid shirt and brown cowboy hat came up to your table that you realized why. 

"Kayce Dutton, is that you? I haven't seen you in god knows how long." He greeted even though his focus was entirely on you. "And, who is this fine thing? You're not from around here. I would've remembered someone as gorgeous as you."

Your boyfriend tensed up while he glared at the man. You placed your hand on Kayce's arm, silently begging him to calm down. 

"Now I know why we haven't seen you in town lately. You've been shacked up with this sweet little thing at your daddy's house."

Kayce stood up abruptly, his chair falling back in the process. "Watch your fucking mouth."

"Easy tiger." The man chuckled and turned his hungry eyes back to you. "We went to high school together. I'm Jesse Miller. And, you are?"

"Not interested." 

He clutched his shirt above his heart. "Ouch. You really know how to break a guy's heart."

"It's time for you to leave." Kayce fumed.

Jesse rolled his eyes before grinning at you. "I'll see you around, beautiful." 

Your boyfriend's chest heaved, his fists started to come up, but Jesse left, rejoining his friends at the bar. 

"Hey." Your hand wrapped around his fist, which unclenched. His fingers mixed with yours. You gave a gentle tug and he sat down on his chair that a server had picked up on their way by during the confrontation. 

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm good. Are you?"

"I should've hit him for how he talked to you, for ruining our date." He started getting tense again so you ran your thumb across the back of his. 

"He didn't ruin our date." You slid your chair closer to his and leaned in.

He did the same. "No?"

"No." Your lips pressed against his. When you pulled back, your teeth tugged on his lower lip. He let out a low growl and you giggled sensually. "Burgers first."

"And, you for dessert." His hand quickly slid into your hair and pulled you back in. This time you moaned when the brief yet toe-curling kiss ended. "Fuck, you're cute." 

Your cheeks flushed as your server set your burgers and fries in front of you. After you both thanked her and she left, you brushed your foot against your cowboy's denim-covered shin. "I have a feeling you're going to need your energy for dessert so eat up."

"Yes, ma'am." He smirked the smirk that drove you crazy before picking up his burger.

*

"Okay, you were right about the burgers here. They are amazing. I'm so full, I can barely move."

Kayce chuckled and slung his arm around your shoulders, pulling you against him. He was about to say something when a cocky voice cut in. 

"Leaving so soon, sweetheart?" 

Your hold on Kayce's hand tightened as you continued walking past Jesse.

"Awe, come on, baby." Jesse's hand wrapped around your wrist. "I'm a hundred times more of a man than this loser ever will be." 

"Get your fucking hand off her." Kayce spat. His old high school classmate released your arm and Kayce tucked you behind him. 

"Can we go?" You asked your boyfriend, who was rigid with anger and shooting daggers at Jesse with his eyes. 

"Run off and have your fun," Jesse smirked as he looked you up and down. "She'll be in my bed after because you couldn't satisfy her." 

Your boyfriend's fist connected with the smug cowboy's face. "Kayce. Kayce, stop." He hit him a total of three times before his friends, who were at the bar with him, rushed to his side. 

"I'm good. I'm good." Jesse said, stopping them from retaliating. He cracked his jaw and let out a chuckle. "The Navy taught you how to fight. I hear they taught ya how to kill too."

"Stay the fuck away from her," Kayce pronounced each word firmly, harshly. 

"You make it sound like a challenge," Jesse's eyes bore into you, "everyone knows I never back down from a challenge."

The look in his eyes made you cower against Kayce. "Can we go? Please." 

He immediately turned his attention to you. "Yeah, baby. Let's go home." His arm wrapped around your waist and pulled you against him when he saw you shaking. When you got to the truck, instead of going to the passenger door, he guided you to the driver's side. 

You climbed up and stayed in the middle of the bench, wanting to be close to him. He reached across your lap and pulled you flush with his side before starting the truck and driving off. 

"I'm sorry." The fingers on his right hand nervously fiddled with the hem of your dress. "What he said, the way he looked at you, grabbing your wrist; it wasn't right. He deserved it. I'm sorry if I scared you or if it made you think of him."

Memories of Nick had played through your head when Kayce got mad when he hit him, but he didn't need to know that. It would just make him more upset. "You don't have to apologize, Kayc." You wrapped yourself around his arm, reassuring him. "Jesse or whatever his name is creeped me out but that's it."

"You don't have to worry about him, baby. He's not going to touch you. I'll make sure of it." 

After kissing his cheek, you cuddled against him, letting out a content sigh. He kissed your head and the rest of the drive was spent in a comfortable silence.

****************************************************

Tag: @saintnourah

[writeroutoftime]

belated valentine’s day blurbs

please love me - steve harrington/ “after all…I’m just a girl, standing in front of boy, asking him to love her.” - Notting Hill

what I hate about you - tommy shelby/ “but mostly I hate the way I don’t hate you. not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.” - 10 Things I Hate About You

the greatest thing you'll ever learn - jamie tartt/ “the greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.” -Moulin Rouge

crazy things - sir leon/ “people do crazy things - when they’re in love.” - Hercules

don't write me off just yet - john shelby/  “and no, I know, based on my track record, I might not seem like the safest bet. All I’m asking you is don’t write me off just yet.” - Musics & Lyrics

untitled blurb - benedict bridgerton/ “when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” - When Harry Met Sally

choose me - eddie munson/ "choose me. marry me. let me make you happy.” - My Best Friend’s Wedding

just as you are - foggy nelson/ “I like you very much. Just as you are.” – Bridget Jones’s Diary

don't wanna lose you - jamie tartt/ “with everything to win, the only thing I lose is you.” - Anastasia the Musical

lasso the moon - foggy nelson/ “what do you want? you want the moon? ust say the word and I’ll throw a lasso around it and pull it down.” - It’s a Wonderful Life

and yet... - jack thompson/ “you like because and you love despite. you like someone because of all of their qualities, and you love someone despite some of their qualities.” - Set it Up 

[userkayjay]

OUTLANDER 5.08 [+deleted scene]

inspired by the beautiful mind of @saltybenchday -> [x] <-

[littlecrabbs]

Felt inspired by the clothes-swap trend

Enjoy John wearing an oversized kilt while Jamie feels utterly humiliated in a British uniform

[bullet-prooflove]

Yellowstone Masterlist

Jamie Dutton Masterlist

Young John Dutton Masterlist

Kayce Dutton Masterlist

Lee Dutton Masterlist

Rip Wheeler Masterlist

Ryan Masterlist

Travis Wheatley Masterlist

Walker Masterlist

[blakeswritingimagines]

Wiping Away A Kiss

Quinn Hughes: He would react with a mix of amusement and affection. He would probably chuckle and playfully swat at your hand, teasingly telling you to stop. At the same time, he would feel a sense of warmth and affection for you, knowing that you are just enjoying your time together. He might even playfully kiss your hand or face to retaliate, just to keep the fun and flirty banter going between you.

Jack Hughes: If you played around and wiped his kisses off with a playful gesture, he would laugh and playfully pretend to be upset. He'd jokingly tell you how it's unfair to mess with his affections and playfully act like he's hurt by the action. He'd probably then laugh about it, pull you close, and give you another big, affectionate kiss.

Luke Hughes: If you playfully wipe off his kisses, he would likely respond by laughing and playfully trying to kiss you again. He may tease you a little bit and act mock offended, then grin and laugh as he playfully tries to lean in for another kiss. He'll playfully joke with you and say something like "What, you don't love my kisses?" or "Am I not the best kisser you've ever had?"

Nico Hischier: When you playfully wipes off his kisses, he'd playfully pout and try to give you more kisses. He might jokingly pretend to be offended, but in reality, he finds it endearing and playful. He'll playfully protest and try to give you more kisses, saying something like, "Hey, you're not allowed to wipe that off! I gave you a kiss, and you're supposed to keep it!"

Timo Meier: If you playfully wiped off his kisses, he would likely respond playfully as well. He might playfully pretend to be hurt and say something like "Oh, you're rejecting my kisses? I see how it is." Or he might try to steal another kiss and say something like "Oh, you thought I didn't see you try to wipe off my love! Well, you underestimated me!" It's all just in good fun and a playful way of showing affection.

Dawson Mercer: If you playfully wiped off his kisses, he might react playfully too, perhaps trying to playfully "steal" another kiss, while smiling and playfully bantering about it. He might tease you a little, or even make a silly pouty face, pretending to be "hurt" or "disappointed" by the gesture. He'll make a lighthearted comment about how he'll have to redouble his efforts to win your heart again.

John Marino: if you playfully wipes off his kisses, he has a good sense of humor and would likely have a big smile on his face. He would find it cute and amusing, and appreciate your playful and affectionate nature. Maybe he would jokingly chase after you and attempt to give you more kisses.

Kirby Dach: He would likely react with a mixture of amusement and affection. He might chuckle and playfully protest, saying something like, "Hey! Don't wipe off my kisses!" He would also appreciate the gesture, finding it sweet and lighthearted. He would likely continue trying to give kisses and playfully bantering with you in a loving and affectionate manner.

Juraj Slafkovsky: If you playfully wipe off his kisses, he would smile and laugh along with you. He would probably playfully pretend to be offended, like pouting or looking sad, even though he knows it's just a joke. Then, he may try to steal another kiss, or playfully tease you about it later

Arber Xhekaj: He would react to you playfully wiping off his kisses with a playful grin and a teasing quip. He would probably say something along the lines of "oh no, you're erasing my kisses! I'll have to give you even more!" He would then playfully chase after you, giving you quick kisses on the cheek or neck as he tries to "retake" his kisses.

Cole Caufield: When you playfully wipes off the kisses he gave you, he can't help but smile and feel a little mischievous. He loves it when you try to tease him like that! It's like a playful game between you. He might even playfully say, "Hey!" or "Don't wipe that off!" in a playful manner. He might even give them a goofy or silly grin, depending on the mood. It's a fun and playful way to show affection and flirt with each other.

Trevor Zegras: When you playfully wipe off his kisses with a cheeky smile, he feels a mix of amusement and affection. He may playfully pout or protest, but deep down, he loves your playful banter. He might even playfully chase after you to plant another kiss, continuing your silly and affectionate moment together.

Jamie Drysdale: Whenever you playfully wipe off his kisses, he usually reacts with a smile and a flirtatious response. He might playfully tease back and ask you why you don't want to be kissed by such a handsome guy, or he might simply lean in again for another kiss and playfully try to make it harder for you to wipe it off.

Matt Rempe: If you playfully wiped off his kisses, he would likely react with amusement and affection. He would probably playfully pretend to be offended, but he would appreciate the playfulness and the affectionate gesture. He might laugh and jokingly try to kiss you again, perhaps getting pretend revenge by grabbing you and kissing you all over your face until you surrender and give in to his affections.

[pileofboneswrites]

IN THE WIND_oneshot.yellowstone

SUMMARY — loosely inspired by the song cheyenne by ian munsick. every year he never asks anything from you, resigned to the routine you've created; you pull into the yellowstone, park your trailer, and spend all your time with him, and then when august rolls around you pack it all in, and leave. this year, instead of dancing around the heartache, he [and a few others] ask you to stay.

PAIRING — fem!reader x lee dutton

WORD COUNT — 4.1k

WARNINGS — established friends with benefits type relationship, lee has been in love with reader since they met, pinning, allusions to smut, lee watches reader get dressed – reader puts on a show, no use of y/n — everyone calls her honey as a nickname, mentions of heartbreak, mentions of murder (not overly graphic), mentions of past abuse, angst

you put your truck in park, tucked along the side of the house like you always do. you open the trailer up, lead you horse peaches out into the fenced off area out front, and then wander up the front steps and into the house. you kick off your boots, and pad through the hallway, taking in the view from the living room windows. you enter the open concept kitchen, grabbing a beer and setting to work on tidying up. you start with the dishes, there aren't as many as there were last time.

next, you sweep, the build up of dirt he's tracked into the house has you frowning. after, you throw laundry in — your own clothes first of course. next is vacuuming, followed by grabbing the load of groceries from your cold box in your truck. lastly, you step into the shower, watching the setting sun as you deep condition your hair and shave your legs. when you wrap yourself in your towel you hear the front door open, a pair of boots falling heavily on the hardwood floor.

"honey," lee breathes out, a wide smile on his face as he steps into the warm room, and enveloping you in his arms, his lips latching onto your own.

"hi," you giggle, through pecks to your lips, followed by him slipping his tongue into your mouth.

you allow it for a few moments, relishing in his closeness. you untangle yourself from him, making him frown cutely at you. you give him a teasing smile, and peck him on the lips once more.

"i just swept, and washed those floors of yours, lee dutton. i'm not impressed," you slip past him in your bath towel, tsking at him as you go.

"i'm sorry honey, allow me to make it up to you," he says, a devious smile on his lips, as he follows you into his bedroom.

he catches you by the end of the bed, arms circling your waist as he pulls you flush with his chest. you look up at him throughout your eye lashes, and he bites his lip looking down into your eyes. he dips his head, resting his forehead on your shoulders, his lips ghosting over your collarbone. you want so badly to give in, but you have plans tonight.

"sorry cowboy," you murmur, pushing him away, turning towards his closet—where you keep a sizable amount of your clothes. "you need to shower, and get dressed."

"dressed? for what?" he groans dropping onto the end of the bed, slipping off his boots.

"the carnival? you promised tate last summer we'd be there to ride on the rollercoaster with him?" you say, glancing at him over your shoulder.

"you remember that?" he asks, rasing an eyebrow at you.

you giggle, dropping your towel to put on your underwear. lee moans quietly at the view of your naked body. you slowly pull them up, bending over to give him a full view of your bum. he sucks in a sharp breath, eyes never leaving your skin as you tease him.

you nod, "i do, and he's only text me about it everyday since – so y'know, it'd be hard to forget."

"yeah..." he agrees with you absentmindedly, eyes clinging to your chest as you twist your bra around your chest pulling it up. "hard to– hard to forget."

you make a show of putting your arms through the straps, and pulling the cups up. lee hangs off your every move, his fascination with your body not ending even with your boobs covered. his eyes rake up and down your figure, his eyes dark, and his bottom lip betweeen his teeth as he works through something silently. you feel smug with satisfaction as you step closer, slinging one leg over either side of his hips. you sit on his lap, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, bringing his attention back up to your face.

"baby," you whisper, lips ghosting over his.

"mhmm," he hums, hands landing on your hips.

"you promised,"

he nods, "i did,"

"but?"

his grip on your hips tightens, briefly, then retract.

"nothing, honey, i can wait." he leans in closer to your ear, "but tonight, i'm not going to be able to stop myself."

a shiver goes up your spine, goosebumps exploding over your arms. you missed that. he easily lifts you off his lap, setting you beside him. he stands, heading into the bathroom to shower, the door clicking closed calmly behind him. you sit there, surprised by his show of restraint. he doesn't normally do that, normally he would have had your face pressed into the mattress in a seconds notice. after taking a second to collect yourself, you stand up, and walk back over to the closet.

you pick out a dark green summer dress, a pair of brown cowboy boots in better shape than the ones you'd worn here. you grab a cardigan, and a cowboy hat that matches your boots. you then go back into the kitchen, and grab your cellphone from where you'd left it charging. two missed messages from monica dutton long.

hi aunt honey it's tate! excited to see you and uncle lee tonight rollercoster here we come!

hey, it's monica, just wanted to let you and lee know we'll be by the ticket booth. tate's very excited, see you at 9.

ten minutes pass, and lee is walking down the hallway. he's wearing a button that coincidentally matches your dress, his good hat and his best boots. he looks refreshed, the stress of the day washed away, and a easy smile on his face.

"well don't you look handsome," you smile, stepping into his embrace.

he kisses you deeply, your knees go weak, his arm sliding around your back steadying you. he smirks into your lips, and you pull back rolling your eyes playfully at him. you forgot how much you enjoyed being here, being with him.

"honey, you are the most beautiful woman i have ever met; dressed up like this, or covered in sweat and dirt from a long day."

your heartaches at his confession; it's temporary, you'll be gone again come the end of august. then the cycle continues. you smile, enjoy it now. lee's always been your favourite, it's why you keep coming back. he always knows what to say to make your knees weak, and how to break your heart.

"we'd better go," you say, ignoring the disappointment in his eyes as you walk away.

you're always walking away.

x

"i had so much fun!" tate yells, hoisting the matching bear to yours over his head.

"and now he's going to take forever to get to sleep tonight," monica laughs, "thanks for the sugar rush, aunt honey."

"pshhh, he'll crash the minute you get him in the truck." you reply, "and no problem, i live for these moments,"

"it was good seeing you, honey." monica says, pulling you into a hug.

"you too mon, we need to get coffee before i leave." you tell her, giving her a light squeeze.

"why don't you stay?" she asks, watching as tate makes a beeline for the truck, climbing into the backseat as kayce follows behind him, chatting with lee.

"i can't," you can't tear your eyes away from lee's back as he talks with his youngest sibling, which doesn't go unnoticed by his sister-in-law.

"why not? you and lee act like a married couple and besides; you're perfect for each other." her tone is gentle, like she's talking to an easily spooked animal.

"because..." you debate telling her the truth, the real reason you run every year, and your heart wins out over your rational thinking. "i know that he'll always be there this way, i don't think he'd want me if he had me fulltime."

"how could you possibly think that? lee looks at you like you personally hung the moon, sun and stars. he's so in love with you," she says, smiling softly at you. "you have to know that by now. he turns into a completely different person when you're gone."

"i know he is, i see it in the way he looks at me. i just– i'm terrified of ruining what we have. i'm not an easy person to love, i've been told that my whole life; i'm impulsive, stubborn, bossy, rude, selfish.... he doesn't deserve someone like that. he deserves someone who's sweet, and kind, and... good." you say, "someone like him."

"i don't know... the way you describe yourself; that's not the person i see. i see someone so full of love, and life, someone that helps others no matter what, honey, i've literally seen you give someone the shirt off your back. whoever's pumped your head full of that hate, was trying to convince you you're evil, when you're not. you're none of those things."

"i appreciate that, i'm not sure you're entirely right, but thank you." you shoot her a half smile, and squeeze her shoulder before you break away, walking towards lee's truck.

he meets you halfway, entwining your fingers, and pulling you closer.

he smiles at you, "that was fun,"

"i knew you'd have a good time,"

"thank you for making me come tonight,"

"thank you for winning me a big ass teddy bear," you reply, holding the giant black bear. "i love him, and i'm going to call him dusty,"

"dusty, eh?" he qestions, pulling your door open for you.

"do you have any better ideas?" you quiry, sliding into your seat.

he leans against the passenger door, his head tilted to the side as he thinks. after a few seconds he shakes his head, ducking down to kiss you once. twice. three times before closing the door and walking around to the drivers side.

"wanna grab a pizza on the way?" he asks, and you nod excitedly. "barneys?"

"barneys!" you say it at the same time, and he laughs, patting your left thigh.

x

three weeks later, you're sitting in one of the muskoka chairs up by the main house, a blanket over your legs as you and tate roast marshmallows.

"yours is burning!" tate says, pointing to your marshmallow.

"i love them burnt!" you reply, watching as it catches fire.

"that's weird," tate makes a face, "burnt ones are gross,"

"nuh-huh, they're the best!"

"no! golden ones are!"

"ewwww," comes lee's voice from behind the two of you, "marshmallows? gross!"

"i agree with you there," kayce says, from his chair across the fire pit.

"i second it, too sweet." john adds from beside kacey, and tate looks shocked.

"grandpa! you don't like marshmallows?"

john shakes his head, a disgusted look on his face.

"that's devastating," tate says, and monica lets out a snort of laughter.

"who taught you that word?" she asks, trying to keep a straight face as he stares her down.

"aunt honey, she says it a lot." tate shrugs, turning back to the fire.

monica gives you a quizzical look, as lee sits down beside you, between your chair and hers on your right side. so i don't say fuck in front of your kid, you mouth at her, and she nods in understanding.

"cause i'm trying not to corrupt you," you add, wrapping an arm around his shoulders to give him a quick hug.

"yeah, besides, his dad does a good enough job on his own." lee chuckles making kayce roll his eyes, and flip his brother off while tate's looking away.

"how long are you down for now?" john asks, when the conversation dies down.

your eyes snap to lee, who's looking staight ahead into the darkness. monica and kayce exchange a look before they both take turns glancing at you, and lee.

"uh, 'm not sure just yet," you say awkwardly, your shoulders tensing automatically.

you feel like a dear caught in the headlights. john nods, his attention being stolen by rip who materializes next to him. feeling like john just smacked you, you excuse yourself, wrapping your blanket around your shoulders, and making your way to lee's house. you sit out on the steps, thinking about what you were doing. i'm not good for lee. staying would be a mistake, it would ruin what we have. then i'd be all alone again. you're not sure how long you'd been sat alone, staring off into the dark when you hear lee's boots crunching gravel.

"you okay?" you ask him, and his eyebrows pull together in confusion.

"i'm fine, are you, okay?"

you force yourself to nod, "of course,"

he reaches out for your hand, and you immediately give it to him, allowing him to guide you up into the house. you shed your uggs, blanket, jacket, sweatpants and sweater, when you enter his bedroom. you crawl into bed, pulling the blankets up and waiting for him to crawl in next to you. he does, turning the lights off, and shimmying close to you. you rest your head on his chest, and even after you hear his soft snoring, you can't fall alseep. you lay there, eyes closed trying to sleep, but then the first ray of light speaks into the room.

before you know it, it's six am, and lee's softly shifting you over so he can go shower. you stare up at the ceiling, unmoving. the room is still dark, and when he steps out of the bathroom, towel around his hips, and his hair dripping wet. you pretend to be sleeping when he leans over the bed to give your temple a quick kiss, before he heads down to the bunkhouse. you lie there, staring up at the ceiling, your mind racing. you met lee at a bar in town when you were eighteen, you'd been passing through, on your way to your next race, when he'd caught your eye.

you ended up spending the month curled up in his sheets, praying that it would never end. but like all good things in your life, it did. you'd had a blow out fight about something ridiculous, and after he fell asleep that night you left. you found yourself passing through the following summer, part of you praying you'd see him again. and you did. he sat perched on a bar stool, chatting with rip and two other hands from the ranch. rip saw you first, a knowing smile on his lips, then the other two—who you later came to know as colby and ryan—their conversation fizzled out quickly.

lee had stood, ready to leave for the night, but when he twisted around on that bar stool, he saw you standing there. a smile broke out on his face, and the next thing you knew, you were face down on his mattress, and all was forgotten. it was a cycle that repeated itself for years, this being your tenth summer returning to yellowstone. you couldn't help yourself, there was just something so magnetic about him. you couldn't stay away even if you tried. you show up, play house, counting down the days until a fight breaks out and then you disappear like leaves in the wind.

this time something was different though. everyone around you seemed to be trying to get you to stay. you'd had conversations with kayce, beth, tate, monica and even rip. that was the one you kept rolling over the most. you'd had a similar childhood as he did, but instead of you ending things, your father took your mother and two younger sister's lives then his own. you were seventeen. the only things you had left after that, was your horse, peaches, your truck and trailer. other than some clothes, that was all. you were a traveller, rarely staying in one spot long enough to form any meaningful connections.

lee and the dutton's were an anomaly to that. maybe that was why you always came back, but you couldn't be sure. rip had intercepted you just before supper one night, and despite never having had a much of a real conversation (besides small talk) in your ten years as acquaintances, you sat and listened to what he had to say. rip being a man of few words, had talked to–well more like at you–for twenty minutes. in that time, he'd managed to make you really wonder if running was the best option. you can only run for so long, eventually you'll be too old too, and then what? what would you have to show for it?

you phone goes off on the nightstand, and you sigh, forcing yourself to sit up. monica dutton long. you hit answer, and greet her.

"sorry, were you sleeping?"

"no, no, you're fine. what can i do for you?"

"tate was hoping you'd be up for a ride, i've packed a picnic, and kayce and lee said they'd meet us for lunch."

"sure, that sounds fun," you smile softly, your head screaming, see? you'd miss this if you left. you always do. "i'll get peaches ready, and meet you down at the barn,"

"awesome, tate's already excited. see you down there,"

you hang up, and slide out of bed. your feet hit the hard wood floor, and you go through your routine. you brush your teeth, put on a ballcap, and then throw on a t-shirt, jeans and your boots. you grab a bag of the cookies you bakes yesterday, and jump onto the four wheeler lee leaves for you so you can get around the far without using your truck. over the years, you've noticed that lee gets weird about your truck. it's probably because anytime you go near it, you're usually hauling ass out of yellowstone. you blink away the thought, and head down towards the barn.

lloyd is standing in the bunkhouse doorway when you park the four wheeler, "coffee?"

"oh, yes please." you nod, and he disappears inside returning moments later with a mug for you. "thanks, lloyd."

"you're welcome sweetheart," he smiles at you, and the pair of you stand in a comfortable silence, enjoying your coffee. "y'know, it's nice seeing you around here again,"

the guilt you've felt since you stepped into lee's house flairs back to life, and you nod, forcing a small smile. you go to walk towards the stall's, and he catches your elbow pulling you back.

"i know you've heard it a lot since you got back," he says, staring you down, "but everytime you leave; it's like lee loses part of him... you know that saying, "behind every good man, there's a great woman"? lee needs his great woman around. he needs you around,"

your eyes fill with tears, and you're sobbing before you have much of a chance to try and keep yourself together. lloyd's eyes go wide, and if you weren't losing your mind, you'd have laughed. he guides you into the bunkhouse, closing the door behind him. you plop down at the table, and try to calm yourself. lloyd stares at you, waiting patiently.

"i'm sorry," you mumble, using the shoulder of your shirt to wipe your eyes. "i don't know why that happened,"

"i didn't mean to push you," lloyd tells you, a look of guilt in his eyes.

"no, oh god no, please don't. this isn't your fault. i just..." you trail off looking at your feet. "can i vent for a minute?"

he nods, pulling out a chair and sitting beside you, "please,"

"i come from a pretty fucked up family," you start, lee doesn't even know about what happened to your family. you liked it that way, because every time you give someone an insight into your background, their perspective changed and they started treating you like glass. "i mean, who's isn't? mine... well, mine is a different kind of fucked up. my dad snapped one night, murdered my mom, two baby sisters, and then killed himself. no one's really sure why he did it; he was abusive as shit, sure, but that– that was a kind of rage he never displayed before. he didn't leave a note, he just did it, and then shot himself in the head. go figure the old bastard went the easy way,"

you sigh leaning forward resting your head in your hands, "i started running that night. i'd snuck out to see a boy, and came home to find them all dead. i just took off. had i not snuck out, i would be just like them. i don't have friends, i don't have any family, i've tried to keep to myself but when i met lee... my desire to be isolated changed. i just wanted to be with him. when i'm not here, all i can think about is whether he's safe or not. he's all i think about, but... my dad made it incredibly clear to me growing up that i was a burdern, unlovable, worthless, a waste of space... that kind of thing is difficult to just forget. he told me that everyday, for seventeen years. the scariest part of it all, is that i have my father's rage. i don't want to be like him, but i'm terrified that if i'm too close, i won't see it and it'll be too late."

you look up at lloyd, tears in your eyes, "he told me i wasn't worth loving, and i believe him. i hate leaving, i'm tired of it, but i'm terrified."

someone clears their throat from the doorway, the pair of you jumping at the noise. you turn your head, and see lee standing there, clutching the doorknob so tightly his fingers turn white. lloyd clears his throat, and stands, leaning down only to give your hand a light squeeze. lloyd leaves, and lee closes the door. it takes four long strides before lee is pulling you to your feet by your elbow, and crashing his lips to yours. you're surprised by the action, but melt into his touch. when the pair of you pull apart, breathing heavily, he rests his forehead against yours.

"i love you," he breaths, "you are worthy of love, you deserve happiness, and you are good."

your eyes water, again.

"how do you know i'm not a monster?" you whisper.

"because i know you. you bake cookies when you can't sleep, you pick up spiders and take them outside instead of killing them despite the fact that you're terrified of them, you close your eyes every time you see roadkill because it makes you sad that an animal died, you'd sooner adopt every animal than see them suffer, cute animals excite you, you're scared of thunder but always put on a brave face for tate because you don't want him to freak out, you hold doors open for everyone, and pay for peoples groceries or meal if they can't afford it. you are light, you are warmth, you are so damn good."

you bury your face in his chest, sobbing uncontrollably as he holds you tightly. never in the ten years that lee has known you, has he ever seen your eyes water, let alone see you cry. someone knocks softly on the door, and then monica pokes her head in.

"oh, sorry– i was just going to ask if you guys were ready, but if now doesn't work–"

"no, now's good," you say, pulling your face away from his chest. "we were just–"

"she's staying," lee cuts you off, and she lets out an excited squeal.

"i have to tell kayce and tate!" she says, quickly disappearing.

you look up at him through red, swollen eyes, a teasing smile on your lips.

"i'm staying am i?" you ask wrapping your arms around his back. "'cause last i checked, you're the only one who hasn't asked me to stay."

"hasn't?" he echoes, an embarrassed look on his face as he looks down at you.

"oh yeah, your family was on me the minute i pulled in. you just happened to catch me in the aftermath of lloyd asking me."

"even rip?"

you nod, "especially rip. i think he had me convinced, but i wanted to hear it from you before i made my final decision."

he looks into your eyes, a serious look you've never seen before sliding over his features, "stay, please."

"okay," you whisper, not breaking eye contact, as his lips twitch up.

"marry me?" he says next, "please."

despite how badly he's caught you off guard, you find yourself immediately nodding, a wide smile crossing your face as he grabs you and spins you. you giggle, and he laughs, the pair of you hugging each other tightly.

"i love you," you tell him, "i love you so damn much, and i'm sorry for not you telling you sooner."

"it's ok, because we know now. that's good enough for me."

you nod, "me too."

[karenxmenfan]

Jamie Madrox, Multiple Man (47/x)

[pucked-bunnie]

ABOUT: This is a fan-fiction blog centered around hockey players and the nhl, please not that not all requests will be completed and may be deleted if not within my comfort zone.

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