#Like it would take someone 6 days to save enough cookies for an egg that isn't theirs

[qsmprambling]

If cookie access is going to be a big concern with holidays and such coming up, maybe it's worth flagging it with the admins. Maybe add some kind of banker to the bakery that only eggs can access and parents can give cookies to? Or just make it easy and have it that everyone's cookies are worth 1 point.

[thezodiacco]

Moceit Appreciation Week Day 1: Baking

Uhhh hello I’ve never posted writing on here but it’s @moceit-appreciation-week so I thought I’d try something new so here you go :3

Content Warning: Food

Rating: Gen

Pairing: Moceit (platonic or romantic)

Word Count: 1,677

Summary: Patton’s baking antics save Janus from an otherwise perfectly boring day.

Janus sighed, skimming over the book he was reading with apprehension. He was alone in his room, like usual, but something was different. There were no sounds of mischief and mayhem of the others running around the common room like usual. 

Roman had taken the others on a “vacation” to the imagination, and he was left out, of course, so it really did feel like he was alone. He usually didn’t mind this feeling, but for some reason there was a cold, empty feeling in his chest today. He tried to shake it off, concentrating on his book, but it remained in its spot, stubborn as ever.

Then his head perked up as the warm, sweet scent of fresh cookies filled his nose. It warmed his heart right up, lifting him out of bed and off his feet. He drifted out of his room, downstairs, and down the hall, ending up in the kitchen. 

There he was met with quite a sight as he landed on his feet. There were 3 different boxes of cookie mix on the counter, as well as 2 different boxes of cupcake mix. Tubs of icing and bottles of sprinkles were strewn about, and flour coated the walls from floor to ceiling. 

In the midst of all this mess was a very powdery Patton, currently turned away from him and whisking some sort of mix in a mixing bowl, humming a sweet sounding tune.

Janus couldn’t help but smile at the sight, “Patton?”

Patton jumped, making a slight squeak, “Oh, Janus! What, what are you doing here?” He smiled nervously.

Janus had to bite his tongue to keep himself from giggling, “Well, for one, I live here, and two, Roman decided to leave me out of his “grand adventures”, like always. Which brings me to my question; what are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be off frolicking with the others?”

Patton’s eyes widened, “Oh, well, uh. I didn’t, really want to go?” He shrugged. “At least not today! I kinda wanted some time to myself, doing something I loved! I haven’t had a day to just, do some baking in a while, so why not do it today?”

Janus nodded, “Fair enough.”

Then something in Patton’s eyes changed. He furrowed his brows upward a bit, pouting his bottom lip a little. He looked up at Janus with big, pleading eyes, “Maybe you'd, like to help out a bit? Just a little?” He held his arms behind his back, rotating his leg on his toes.

Janus rolled his eyes in his usual fashion, “Of course Patton, I would love to help you.”

“Really?!” Patton smiled, eyes bright, Janus’ lie flying over his head. Janus smiled, letting out a breath, “Yes, Patton, really.” This time he was genuine. It’s not like he had anything better to do anyway.

Patton motioned him to join him at the counter with his arm. “Now, the first batch of cookies is in the oven, and the cake is already in the fridge.”

“You already baked a whole cake?!” Janus asked in disbelief.

“Yeah! But you can’t look at it yet.” Patton pointed at him very seriously. Janus nodded, smiling, “I won’t, I promise.”

Patton smiled back, handing him a mixing bowl, a whisk, and a box of cookie mix. He got to work, measuring out enough vegetable oil and water and mixing it in with the powder. He cracked a few eggs, and whisked it as hard as he could. 

“Woah, slow down there kiddo!” Patton exclaimed, putting a hand on his arm. “You gotta take it slow and easy, really make sure to get all the chunks out.”

Janus nodded, slowing down. Patton was pulling off bits of his cookie mix and balling it up, setting the balls on a cookie sheet. Janus wanted to pick up speed, to catch up with Patton, but took his advice, moving at a slower pace.

Patton put the next batch of cookies in the oven, taking the first batch out. They were chocolate chip, and they smelled absolutely heavenly. He looked at his own cookie mix box and found they were snickerdoodles. 

Soon Janus was ready to put his own cookies on the cookie sheet, while the others were cooling. He did so, and Patton took the sheet and put that one in the oven as well. 

“Why don’t we start on the cupcakes while those other two batches are baking?” Patton suggested. Janus nodded, and they each took a box. 

Patton couldn’t help but lick some of the batter off his whisk before getting new utensils out. He and Janus locked eyes, both of them breaking out in laughter. “It’s really good! You should try some!” Patton smiled, handing him the whisk.

Janus’ face flushed slightly, taking it. He licked off what was remaining, the sweet flavor of cookie batter staying on his tongue. “It’s very good indeed, Patton.”

Then they got to work on the cupcakes. Patton’s mix was vanilla, while Janus’ mix was chocolate. Patton set his bowl aside and opened the oven, taking the second batch of cookies out.

“How do you know when they’re done without a timer?” Janus asked.

“I don’t know, I just, know.” Patton smiled with a shrug. Janus couldn’t help but smile back. He was slowly getting used to Patton’s eccentricities, and they had started to intrigue him.

After they started pouring the cupcake batter into the cupcake liners, Patton got out the third batch of cookies. That was finally done. Now they could completely focus on the cupcakes.

It took a very long while, but all three of the cookie batches, as well as both of the cupcake batches, were done. Patton smiled proudly, looking over his work. Janus let out a tired breath, wiping the sweat from his forehead.

“Ah ah ah! We’re not done yet! We have to decorate the cupcakes.” Patton smiled, picking up the icing. Janus sighed, but smiled. He was, actually enjoying himself. Needless to say, he was quite surprised.

While they got started, Janus couldn’t help but ask, “Patton, who are all of these sweets for?”

“Oh, no one, just myself I suppose.” Patton smiled sadly. Janus grimaced, a sour taste filling his mouth. He could always tell when someone was lying. The question was, why would Patton lie about this?

They iced all the cupcakes with three different colors of icing, and sprinkled 6 different sprinkles on top. Now, they were finally, completely, done.

They looked at each other, out of breath. Patton's brown eyes were wide, with a look Janus didn't completely recognize.

"Look, um, I'm sorry, but I kinda lied to you before, about who all the baking was for." Patton admitted as he scratched the back of his neck, guilt on his face.

"I know, Patton. I can tell when people are lying." Janus reminded him. 

His eyes widened. "Oh, right! Duh!" He laughed nervously. "Well, I'm sorry, anyway…" He trailed off, hesitantly opening the fridge. He grabbed something, pulling it out carefully. It was the cake. The frosting was black, with yellow details. It read, Welcome Home Janus.

"It's devil's food cake. I thought you'd like it." He smiled, hesitant, a pink blush on his cheeks.

Janus' eyes were wide, the breath stolen from his lungs. He didn't know what to say. "This, this is for me?"

Patton nodded, keeping his smile. Janus finally let out a breath, brows furrowing. "Was all of this," he pointed to the mess in the kitchen, "for me?"

"Kinda." Patton shrugged. Janus sucked in air, face flushing hot. "Patton, you realize that it's gonna take me months to eat all this, right?"

"I know! I know I got carried away, but the others can have some too! It's just, you've been trying so hard, and doing so well! You've really been helping Thomas. So, I wanted to do something to thank you, and to welcome you into the family!"

A smile crept onto Janus' face as he stared at the cake. It was so gorgeously decorated. "I- I don't know what to say, Patton. Thank you."

Patton beamed. He took the cake, setting it aside on the counter. He then embraced Janus, squeezing onto the back of his cape tight.

Janus faltered, not used to the touch. Patton was warm, and soft, his body completely grounding. It took a couple of deep breaths, but soon he hugged back, resting his hands on Patton's hips gently.

They stayed like that for a while, but broke the contact once they heard footsteps enter the room. It seemed that Roman and Virgil were in mid conversation.

"And I said to him! I said-" Roman cut himself off as he caught sight of them, stopping dead in his tracks. He glanced at Virgil, both of their jaws hung open. "I'm sorry, are we interrupting something?"

"No!" Janus protested immediately, whole face flushing red as he glanced away.

"No, not at all! We were just baking." Patton smiled as he looked at Janus, who looked back hesitantly. "Speaking of which," he turned backward and grabbed one of the cookie sheets, presenting it to them, "We made cookies!"

"Cookies!" Roman exclaimed, clapping his hands, seeming to have forgotten about the sight before them. Virgil rolled his eyes as Roman took the sheet and moved over to the couch. At that point Logan finally came in, "What are we doing now?"

"Cookies." Roman pointed to the sheet, mouth already full. Logan blinked, "Oh, well, I suppose it would be rude of me to turn this down, so," He joined the other two on the couch, grabbing some for himself.

Janus and Patton looked on. Patton was smiling to himself, then he smiled at Janus. Janus glanced at him, smiling back.

"Well, don't you wanna try some of our hard work?" Patton suggested. Janus nodded, then they moved towards the couch. Janus smiled, taking a deep breath as he was surrounded by the others. He felt a sense of comfort, belonging.

He was beginning to feel at home.

@moceit

[atlasishere]

I Bake Sins Not Tragedies pt. 1

Characters: Logan, Virgil, Patton, Roman, Remus, Janus, Remy, Emile

Relationships: Analogical(eventually), Royality (in progress), Dukeceit(background), Remile(background)

Word Count: 7568 

A/N: I wrote most of this before the newest Sanders Sides video, so if Janus’ name is incorrect, sorry, let me know if it is.

Taglist: @normallyaspen @watchoutforthefanfics @superwholocked-for-life (if you wanna tagged when the next part is uploaded or whenever I write, let me know)

 Virgil “woke up” at 6:00, meaning that he snoozed his 6:00 alarm until 6:30 when he had to get up for work. He got up, put on his black jeans, purple shirt with long sleeves that would end up getting rolled up, and grabbed his hoodie. He walked into his kitchen and grabbed the pizza from about two nights ago and ate it cold. He put on his converse and walked to his bakery, arriving at 6:45 with just enough time to set up before his first customers walked in. He went through his day, making his baked goods, jamming to his emo music, eternally grateful to his brother, Patton, willingly helped him run his bakery. 

Logan woke up at 6:00 sharp, got dressed in jeans and a black short-sleeved polo, gelled his hair back, and ate a simple breakfast of cereal and eggs. He read a book until 7:30 when he left to go open the tattoo parlor he worked at. 

These two men lived their lives separately until one fateful day. Virgil had decided he wanted to get a new tattoo, something simple. He had considered getting something in remembrance of MCR but he already had one. He already had a flower for his dad, a Starbucks cup with sunglasses for his ren, and a blue heart with glasses for his brother. Along with that, he had some lyrics from “Na Na Na” by MCR. So Virgil went through the things that are important to him and decided to look up symbols for them. He had found a couple of ideas and sketched them. As he was doing this, he looked at his copy of Coraline on the bookshelf across from him, and inspiration hit. He sketched two black buttons and a spool of thread and called his brother out, “Yo, Patton. Come look at this tattoo idea.” 

Patton walked out, looked at it, said, “I like it, what’s the inspiration?”

“Coraline, the buttons were supposed to take her to this life of ‘happiness’ but it would have led to more pain and she discovered that her own life wasn’t as bad as she thought. It was all about her perspective,” Virgil shared, having clearly thought this through as he sketched it.

“I like it. Where would you put it, dear sibling?” Patton asked.

“Well, somewhere I would see it daily. Also, I use ‘they and he’ pronouns so no need to use sibling,” Virgil answered, “Heck if you wanted to use ‘she’ I wouldn’t complain. When I came out, I said I am indifferent to pronouns.”

“I know sib, but I like using the more neutral pronouns, a habit I picked up from Remy for a parental unit,” Patton countered. 

“Fair point, but with my fluctuating gender, it’s kinda pointless,” Virgil argued.

“Oh freaking well, deal with it,” Patton said, ending the argument, knowing that Virgil wasn’t irritated.

Virgil decided that he needed to put his stuff away and get back behind the counter and help his brother. 

A full day of baking, serving teens and college students, and cleaning up, Virgil walked home. As he did so, he was paying close attention to his surroundings, looking for tattoo parlors that he could look into. As he was walking, Virgil saw a sign for a tattoo parlor and decided to check it out. 

Logan heard the bell above the door of the tattoo parlor where he worked ring and looked up to see a man dressed in black jeans, a light purple top, and a patched hoodie. As the man approached, Logan decided to partake in his favorite activity, at least while at work, guessing their tattoo, he guessed it was probably song lyrics from one of those emo bands. It turns out that Logan would be pleasantly surprised. 

“Hi, I am new in town and looking for parlors to get this tattoo that I want. I was curious if you had any examples of some of the work that you guys do,” the man asked, with a deep, smooth voice that caught Logan off guard.

“We have several artists with different specialties, so it depends on what you want. Do you have a picture or sketch of what you want?” Logan asked, keeping it professional but giddy to figure out if he was right.

The man pulled out a square piece of paper and said, “It’s not super complex,” Logan stared at the spool of thread and black buttons as the man continued, “It’s based on the book “Coraline” by Neil Gaiman.”

So, Logan was wrong, “I mean most of us could do that but I like to think I am the most qualified.”

“Got any examples of your work?” the man asked cheekily.

Logan decided to get his best friend up here who happened to let Logan do all of his tattoos, “Roman get your lazy ass up here!”

“Lose again specs?” Roman asked as he got up.

The man looked confused and Logan decided to change the subject quickly and said, “Show this customer some of my work please.”

“If you wanted me shirtless, all you had to do was ask,” Roman countered as he removed his shirt to show the tattoos. There weren’t many but the ones appeared to be sentimental and detailed. 

“I may be pansexual, but I am not desperate,” Logan said, continuing the banter.

“Wow, rude, and in front of this fine young person too,” Roman said, pretending to be hurt.

“Well, they probably didn’t want to see your chest either, but you refuse to get them anywhere but your back and chest,” Logan countered, clearly noticing the way Roman had glanced at the bracelet on the customer’s wrist that said he/they. They looked surprised that someone had noticed that.

“Well, maybe I don’t want to ruin my wonderful arms or legs, Mr. Andy Hurley,” Roman said, attempting to defend his honor.

“I’ll take that as a compliment since Andy Harley is a very attractive man and I do enjoy a good amount of Fall Out Boy,” Logan countered.

Roman scoffed as Logan turned to the customer and said, “I guess I should introduce myself, formally. I am Logan Croft.”

The man smiled and shook Logan’s outstretched hand firmly as he replied, “I am Virgil.”

“I would like to apologize for my fiend, I mean friend, he gets quite excitable at times,” Logan said as he glared at his friend.

“Actually, I like your work and wouldn’t mind getting my tattoo here. May I make an appointment?” Virgil asked.

Logan looked astonished as he said, “Sure, when would you like to?”

“I don’t work until later on Saturday, would that work?” Virgil asked.

“Yes it will,” Logan answered.

Virgil nodded then gave a quick wave goodbye as he left. Logan watched the door close and turned his head to see Roman with that impish look he got. 

“You like him!” Roman shrieked.

“No, too soon to tell,” Logan said, “Also what happened to ‘they’?”

“His bracelet said, ‘He/They’. Also, if not yet, soon. I mean he’s cute so I understand but not my style,” Roman said, “I mean his brother’s pretty cute and comes to my pharmacy and I’ve had my eye on him for a bit.”

“You know his brother?” Logan asked.

“Well, they own that emo themed bakery up the street from the pharmacy where I work,” Roman shared.

Logan took Roman’s statement as food for thought as he left the parlor, waving at his coworker goodbye. He walked home and thought about the customer who had come in so close to the end of his shift. Logan didn’t necessarily believe in soulmates, fate, or chance since there was no scientific proof but he also had an emotional side and hope. Soon after he thought this, Logan’s logical side won over and said that there was no reason other than the obvious convenient coincidence. He entered his simple apartment, grateful that his roommates weren’t home. He started cooking dinner, which was almost finished as his roommates, Roman and his twin brother Remus, walked in. Roman had gone to get Remus since Roman had used their car to get to work so he had to drop off and pick up Remus. Roman’s job was farther out than Logan’s and Remus’ who couldn’t walk to work either. It was a weird set up but they shared a car since neither of them had the money for a second car. Logan didn’t have a car either, he was saving up his money to pay off his loans and hopefully to find a good job somewhere science-related. As the twins dropped their stuff off at the door, Remus was talking about his job at the zoo and the newest animal exhibit there. Logan looked at the very chaotic person who enjoyed handling the animals. His brother, however, was clearly ready to tell his own work story. To prevent a fight, Logan said, “Hey, set the table boys.”

“Okay mom,” Roman said, chuckling. Logan had learned that Roman and Remus thought of him as a motherly figure. 

They sat down for dinner as Roman talked about how his day at the pharmacy went, “Someone who was a regular, came in for their antidepressants and had said, please remember I am paraphrasing, ‘Do you have the potion that shall help me, O’ wise mage’ to which I said a simple yes. They responded with, ‘I thank thee, no curse shall leave my lips that will torment you’. They left the Walgreen’s and I realized that was fairly normal for me. Anyway, Logan, got any good stories besides that cute emo coming in?”

Logan would never admit this to anyone, but some blood rose to his neck as he responded, “No my day was normal, including the man from the bakery. However, I seem to remember something about a cute brother that works with him from you Roman.”

Remus snickered as he watched his two roommates who were definitely crushing pretty hard. He was glad that he was behind those days, having a boyfriend and all. 

That night, Virgil walked home to his apartment that he shared with his old college roommate, Janus, who was making spaghetti for their dinner that night. Virgil set the box on the table that held some “Hey Youngblood” thumbprint cookies from their bakery. Janus looked at the box, pointed a spatula at it as if to ask the contents. Virgil answered the unasked question, “Thumbprint cookies, made with Crofters. And no, I am not calling the cookies by their name because I say it enough at work.”

Janus smiled as he responded, “Well maybe you should reevaluate your decisions then.”

“How about no. I like my bakery as it is, I just kinda regret letting Pat choose the names for the baked goods. By the way, he hasn’t named everything on the menu,” Virgil confessed.

“Should you talk to him? Is it that big of a problem?” Janus asked, genuinely concerned for his friend.

“No, it’s not that. It’s just that it gets a little annoying at times. His puns are super clever though so it’s honestly all good,” Virgil answered, truthfully, recognizing the look on their roommate’s face.

Janus nodded, believing his roommate, as he served the spaghetti. The two sat down to eat when they heard a knock at the door. Virgil got up and checked to see who it was, it was his brother Patton. Virgil opened the door to let him in and as soon as he crossed the threshold Patton exclaimed, “I fucked up real bad. I mean really bad.”

Virgil sighed, probably had to do with the cute pharmacist that stopped by their bakery. Not that Virgil could complain since he usually did the same with Patton but if it was the same person, Virgil thought he might scream. But before he could, Patton continued with his story. 

“So you know the pharmacist who comes in on occasion, well I was at the drugstore where he works and I was unaware that I was speaking with him. So I said, ‘I seek the cure to the darkness in my brain’ and he went through the normal stuff and I had to continue being normal so I responded with, ‘I thank thee, no curse of mine shall harm you’ and now I definitely ruined any chances with him.”

“Patton, I am sure that if he would’ve dated you, he would have been exposed to you and you’re, sometimes, eccentric qualities. I am sure everything will end up being okay,” Virgil said, attempting to comfort their brother. 

“And if it is necessary, I can and will murder,” Janus chimed in, unwelcomely.

“Says the lawyer who prosecutes murder cases,” Virgil quips while making the universal sign for shut the fuck up, the middle finger. 

Janus stayed quiet while Virgil worked on reassuring his brother. Eventually, Patton nodded and appeared to have calmed down. When Virgil invited him to stay for dinner, Patton had turned down the offer since he needed to head upstairs to talk to his roommate since he hadn’t been home.

Virgil sat down at the table with his roommate as Janus’ phone received a notification. Virgil could tell from the look on his friend’s face that it was Janus’ boyfriend texting him. 

“Share the news, Janus, I know you are dying to,” Virgil said as he looked at his plate of spaghetti.

The lawyer smiled as he said, “Well, Roman, the brother of Remus, has started an incorrect quotes blog that is just Remus quotes and conversations.”

Virgil laughed and said, “Can you get the URL, I need to know what this man you are dating is like because you never seem to bring him around.”

Janus texted Remus and got a response fairly quickly. After being told what it was, Virgil grabbed his laptop and looked it up. As he read through the posts and showed Janus a few, he asked, “Is this what he is always like?”

“Yeah, he has his moments of being calm or more chaotic, but this is his usual act,” Janus responded.

The two laughed for a bit at the quotes when Virgil said, “I think the guy that Patton is infatuated with is named Roman.”

“Oh yeah, it is. That is, in fact, the same Roman, and yes, he is also very infatuated with Patton apparently,” Janus responded as he put his phone away and began to eat.

Virgil pondered this new information for a bit and eventually, he began to think about the Roman he met in the tattoo parlor, which in turn, led to him thinking about the guy, Logan. Logically, Virgil knew that he wouldn’t see him after he got his tattoo but part of him was drawn to the man. 

Virgil remained lost in his thoughts until, being the absolute angel that he is, Janus smacked Virgil on the back of the head. Virgil was still jolting as he got out of his chair, ready to fight Janus, and like two siblings fighting over the remote, they both ended up on the ground wrestling. 

After a few minutes of fighting, Janus finally asks, “So what was on your mind?”

“Nothing, I was just thinking,” Virgil said.

“Uh-huh, sure, I think it’s because you have a crush,” Janus teased as he watched his friend attempt to stutter out a response.

Finally able to speak clearly, Virgil said, "Actually, it's not. I was thinking about that tattoo I wanted to get." Virgil hoped that Janus would buy his half-lie and not see the nervous tapping or blood flowing up to his neck.

Janus knew Virgil wasn’t being completely honest, he ate the lies of criminals for breakfast, but he could also read the room and knew this was not the time, so he dropped it. Finally, at ease, Virgil continued their conversation and the two talked until it was close to 10:00.

On Saturday morning, Virgil made sure that their brother had someone to work with him during the day until Virgil was done at the parlor. Since it was confirmed, Virgil got up and dressed in a tank top and open flannel, aware that he would need a looser item of clothing on top of his tattoo. Virgil ate breakfast, left his house, and started towards the tattoo parlor. 

Once they entered, Logan looked up to see who was at the door. His heart was hoping for Virgil and his head was telling him that it shouldn't matter. But it was Virgil and a war started inside of him. His head won, which was smart since Logan would be doing permanent needlepoint on their skin. 

Logan took them back and prepped the needle and Virgil's skin. 

As the needle was buzzing, Virgil appeared to be scrolling Tumblr on their phone as Logan did his job. He tried to refrain from paying attention to Virgil's muscle mass and focused on the project.

After several hours, Logan finished the tattoo and gave Virgil the care instructions. They waved as they left the parlor and headed to their bakery.

Virgil walked into his bakery and was bombarded with questions from their brother. "How did it go? Do you like it? Are you feeling okay?"

Virgil held up their hand and said, "It went well considering I got needlepoint on my skin, I haven't looked since it's on my shoulder, and yes I am okay."

Suddenly Virgil was being dragged to a bathroom by his brother so he could see it as well as Patton. 

Once inside, the light was turned on and Virgil slipped the flannel off of his shoulder. The tattoo looked really good and Virgil was impressed. They walked out of the bathroom, brother in tow, put his uniform on, and washed his hands. 

Throughout the day, the bakery had a steady stream of customers who enjoyed the food, puns, and music. Near the end of the day, Virgil was surprised to see Logan, the tattoo artist, walk through the door. He walked up to the counter as he appeared to scan the menu. As he arrived at the counter, Virgil gave his standard, “Hello, Welcome to I Bake Sins, not Tragedies, How can I help you today?”

Logan smirked and asked, “What are the ‘Hey Youngblood’ cookies?”

“Well, they are a jam thumbprint cookie filled with Crofter’s jam, we have strawberry and blackberry jam,” Virgil answered, trying to use his customer voice he had picked up over the years of working in the real world. 

Logan nodded then said, “Could I please have a ‘Hey Youngblood’ cookie then and a coffee.”

Virgil nodded, took Logan’s money, made his change, and began preparing his order. It wasn’t complex, the cookies had been baked recently and coffee was in a pot, so it took but five minutes to complete. As he brought it out to Logan, he gestured to where the cream and sugar were kept for their customers to use on their own. They had found it to be more convenient and easier. Virgil watched as Logan found a seat at a table and pulled a book from the shelf behind him. Virgil continued to work and serve customers for a while when he noticed that Logan had left, it wasn’t a problem since he had figured where the mugs needed to be returned, but part of Virgil was upset nonetheless.

Logan walked out of the bakery and walked back to the parlor. The bakery was very nice, the music was loud enough to be heard but wasn’t disruptive, their food was very good and Logan desired to find this Crofter’s jam, there was a good selection of books for the customers to read as they sat down, and the aesthetic was less dark but still held to the inspiration. Logan found himself enjoying the Fall Out Boy and Panic! At the Disco puns on the food. He definitely was adding the place to his list of good places to eat at. He conveniently was skipping over the cute enby at the register. That can of worms was not going to be opened. He entered the parlor and saw that Roman was there. “Hey, Eliot, can you take out the trash?” Logan said, gesturing to Roman.

The man at the front desk, Eliot, smiled, and said, “Sorry, I thought that was your job.”

Logan smirked and responded, “Oh yeah, It is.” 

As Logan started to meander towards Roman, the pharmacist definitely looked a little fearful as Logan chuckled, "I was joking with you Roman."

"I am well aware, Specs but it wasn't very nice. Just thought that you confused me for Remus," Roman responded, trying to save his dignity.

"What a vibe check Roman," Logan said, aware the slang was incorrect but also had stopped trying with slang. Roman's face made it worth the lack of education Logan had.

"A what now?!?!? That is so wrong. I really can't believe you just said that " Roman exclaimed, continuing to rant about how Logan doesn't know slang.

Logan chuckled as he watched his friend continue to passionately rant about something as trivial as slang.   

The next week went by fairly routinely for the group. Logan worked at the parlor and occasionally stopped by the bakery with the attractive emo worker, Virgil would work and occasionally see the cute tattoo artist, Patton worked with brother and would attempt and fail to keep it together when a certain pharmacist would come in every day, and Roman would continue his daily routine of stopping in to get breakfast and see the adorable baker. Somewhere in the course of the week, Roman had slipped Patton his phone number, platonically, of course, and that sparked a conversation and eventually friendship between the two.

Virgil and Logan did not interact that much but were slowly becoming comfortable with each other’s presence. They would have a casual conversation when Logan would come in and on occasion, Logan would happen to ask about books that Virgil had. They kinda wanted to talk to Logan more, but it’s kinda hard when a guy comes in right at the time that high school students get out of school. 

But that week was done and the weekend was bringing a special surprise, the arrival of Virgil and Patton’s parents. 

It was Friday night, a mere twenty minutes before closing and the bakery was empty. Virgil and Patton had a little bit of extra bread dough from the day. It was only about the size of a fist and well, Virgil had technically started it. He had tossed it and ended up throwing it at his brother. Patton received the dough splat on the back of his head and turned to see his sheepish sibling looking incredibly nervous. Patton smiled and tossed it back to him. Virgil caught it and chuckled. The game slowly got bigger as Virgil and Patton ended up outside the kitchen and in the main area. They continued for a few more minutes when suddenly the doors opened and in walked Emile and Remy, the parents of the two bakers. 

And like children caught with their hands in the cookie jar, they froze and went to finger-pointing. Emile chuckled and held his hands up and Patton tossed the ball to his dad. 

“Think fast dear,” Emile told his partner as he threw the dough to Remy.

Remy caught the dough and smiled. They tossed it to their child and the game continued for a few more minutes until some late-night closer customers came in.

“C’mon, I need to see Patton and you wouldn’t mind seeing Virgil. Their bakery doesn’t close for a  whole 15 minutes,” Roman whined.

“I am aware and no I wouldn’t mind but it is late. One of us needs to be the voice of reason here,” Logan said, not wanting to admit how much he kind of wanted to see a particular baker.

“There is no reason not to,” Roman argued.

Logan would blame it on the fact that he was tired and not because he was giving in to the want to see someone who may not even be attracted to men as he acquiesced to Roman’s request, “Fine, Roman. Let me grab my jacket and we can walk there since Remus took the car when he dropped you off.”

The two walked to the bakery. When they arrived, they saw four people tossing something and smiling. Logan assumed they were laughing. As he looked, he saw Virgil and from the look on Roman’s face, could assume that Patton was in there as well. However, Logan felt a little preoccupied with Virgil and their existence. Their face was a little flushed and they were smiling as they threw what appeared to be bread dough. 

Eventually, Logan snapped out of his trance and realized that he was definitely gay for this nonbinary emo baker. He also made the snap decision that the other two, older, adults were likely family. Logan was going to tap Roman on the shoulder and tell him that they should just head home, but, Roman’s hand was on the doorknob and was opening the door. 

Well, Logan would argue that he had to join his friend and walked in. He was greeted with what was becoming a familiar scent of baked bread and an earthy scent that was likely from an air freshener. He felt bad for interrupting the family time that was happening, but the look of surprise and happiness on Virgil’s face almost, keyword almost, took away his anxiety. Virgil hopped behind the counter and asked what they wanted.

“Could I have a ‘Hey Youngblood’ cookie and a loaf of bread?” Logan asked and gestured for Roman to step up and order.

“Could I have some ‘Pretty Odd Macarons’?” Roman asked.

Virgil nodded, rang up the order, and began to get the food. While Virgil was doing that, Patton had approached Roman and the two began talking. 

Virgil handed him the bag and Logan just had to open his mouth and ask, “So, uh, who are these lovely people?” He was nervous and apparently he cannot control his mouth around cute people.

Virgil looked at Remy, who nodded, before responding. “Well, my ren would probably appreciate that you didn’t say men as they are nonbinary and their name is Remy,” Virgil said as he gestured to the person with a leather jacket and sunglasses, “And the other man is my dad, Emile,” Virgil answered as he gestured to the man in a suit with a cardigan and glasses. 

Then Virgil gestured to Logan and said, “This is my friend Logan. Just so everyone knows everyone.”

Logan could feel the blood rushing to his neck and shuffled his feet as he waved. 

Roman smiled and introduced himself, looked at the clock and realized that it was pretty late, and turned to Patton to say goodbye.

Logan turned to Virgil and said, “We need to get back to our apartment and make sure that Remus hasn’t burned it down. He has been at the house alone for around three hours and is pretty chaotic. It was nice seeing you, goodbye.’

Virgil chuckled and said, “It was nice seeing you, Logan. Feel free to drop by anytime.”

Logan looked down at the floor to hide the red that was creeping up his neck and towards his face and grabbed his friend to drag him home. 

Logan was at the front door of his apartment and Roman was still whining like a child. The two walked in and were greeted with Remus and his questioning looks. Logan began to share the story.

Virgil waved to Logan and Roman as they left and looked at his watch to see that it was closing time. They waved Patton over to help finish tidying up and gather the baked goods off the shelf and put them in a box.

As the siblings were working, Remy was holding the dough ball and tossing it between their hands. They could tell their husband was proud of their sons but also incredibly curious, like Remy, about the two men who had come in at closing. Their husband looked at them and Remy knew they were the bolder of the two so he asked, “Who were those two?”

Virgil happened to be at the counter at the moment so he said, “Well Roman is Patton’s admirer and Logan is a new friend as well as the guy who did my newest tattoo.”

Patton happened to hear from the kitchen so he piped up and said, “Actually, Roman doesn’t like me but I think Logan likes Virgil.”

This led to an argument. Emile looked at his spouse and moved to stand next to him. “How much do you wanna bet that both of our children are in love and their respective man also loves them?”

Remy chuckled and said, “While I normally don’t condone on gambling, I can make an exception for our oblivious children. I say it takes the rest of the month.” It was, conveniently, at the beginning of the month.

Emile smiled and said, “I think I will go with the month after.” The two lovers shook hands and looked at the children they had raised.

Virgil and Patton had stopped their bickering and were deciding who would take what was left from the day to the homeless shelter.

When Virgil and Patton decided to buy I Bake Sins, not Tragedies, the two decided that they should donate what food was left from the day to a local homeless shelter that was LGBTQ+ friendly and nonprofit. They had found one thanks to the size of the city they lived in.

Patton decided to take that day and texted his roommate, Thomas, that he would be home later.

Virgil asked his parents who they wanted to stay with that night since Patton and Virgil both had a space prepared for them when they had heard their parents say they wanted to visit.

The two looked at each other and Remy said, “Mind if we stay with you? I haven’t talked to Janus in a while and Emile looks so tired that walking up more stairs than necessary may cause him to pass out.” Remy chuckled as their husband smacked them. 

Virgil nodded and texted their roommate that they would have two guests tonight.

After the siblings finished cleaning and closing up, Virgil walked out to their parent’s car and asked if he could ride to the apartment complex with them.

Remy appeared to consider it before letting him in. The three drove to Virgil’s apartment and decided to not stay up too late.

The next morning was one of chaos. Janus had a big trial at noon that day, Remy and Emile were going to spend their morning walking around the city and the afternoon in the bakery. Virgil’s anxiety was skyrocketing at the thought of something bad happening and was ready to punch something. 

Having woken up earlier than usual, Virgil had the chance to run around the block before getting ready to work. So, he ran. They knew they needed to run to get the nerves under control and they would have the chance to work with dough all day which helps with the aggression aspect of his anxiety. 

After Virgil’s quick run, he went to his apartment, showered off, and put his standard dark clothing and hoodie on. Virgil walked to the bakery in record time and had enough time to put his apron on and help his brother pull the tray out of the oven. Patton had come in early to bake since he was a morning person but Virgil and Patton often alternated each week for who would come in earlier to get the first round in the ovens.

Patton decided to man the register while Virgil took over baking for the morning shift.

The brothers worked nonstop until 11:30, which was standard for Saturdays and enjoyed the break they would receive until the late lunch rush. During this time, Janus stopped in to grab a Danger Days Donut and coffee.

The rest of the morning passed without event and Virgil had decided to take a 10-minute break to go and get their anxiety medication from the pharmacy. Waving to Patton, Virgil walked down the street to the nearest Walgreens and back to the pharmacy. When he arrived, he saw a familiar face, the face of Roman. Roman looked up and saw Virgil as he was about to ask for a name. “Hey, Virgil, I am afraid I will need a last name, for protocol, of course.”

Virgil chuckled and said, “Picani, also I was not expecting you to know it. I was not expecting you to work here, in fact.”

Roman chuckled and said, “I’ve served your brother but I am surprised he hasn’t spoken of me.” Roman pulled Virgil’s medicine off the shelf and handed it to him. 

Virgil took the medicine as he made an offhand comment about thinking that his brother was speaking of another Roman, despite the fact that Virgil was fully aware his brother was very taken by Roman.

The two bantered for another minute before Virgil left and headed back to his bakery.

Virgil walked back in and saw Logan at a table near the bookshelves in the back. 

Patton saw them walk in and gave him a thumbs up so Virgil set their prescription in the back and went out to the bookshelves to talk to Logan. Virgil wasn’t sure why he wanted to talk to the tattoo artist, all he knew was there was something drawing him to Logan. 

Logan felt something tap his shoulder and tensed up a bit, startled but when he turned around, he was pleasantly surprised. Logan did not expect to see Virgil out of the back.

“Looking for a book to read?” Virgil asked.

Logan wasn’t but he wanted to hear Virgil talk about something he liked so he said, “I am actually.”

Maybe Virgil knew Logan was lying but if they did, they humored Logan, “Well, I don’t know if you have read ‘Coraline’ but that is a good one, I mean I based a tattoo off of it. But if you want something less creepy, ‘Good Omens’ by Neil Gaiman is also very good. Want out of the fantasy realm and more science fiction, we have many Douglass Adams novels.”

Logan nodded and decided to find Coraline to read. He had not read the story but had heard good things about it. 

Virgil continued to work for the next hour, making his supply for the evening and later night coffee dates, occasionally checking on Logan. Once or twice Virgil would catch themself staring and have to shake themself from their trance. Virgil was realistic, they weren't in a super-wealthy occupation and weren't the most attractive person out there, heck they had heterochromia. The left eye is green and his right is brown, he just wears a colored contact so they both look brown. Virgil was okay with their appearance but wore the contact because he preferred to assuage the questions and because he used to get bullied for it. They also were aware that it was likely an infatuation and would fade quickly.

At some point in the day, Virgil's parents had also snuck into the store and appeared to be snacking on the rejects near the back. Those two were watching their child's potential future boyfriend with interest. 

And for an hour, it was a blissful quiet. Soon after Logan settled with his book, Virgil traded with Patton to start preparing for the evening and post date bakery visitors. It was mostly making the dough and letting it rise. At one point, Virgil went out to sit with their parents and catch up. After a bit, Virgil relieved Patton of register duty and sat on the stool, sketching.

Virgil wasn’t really a great drawer but he liked to do it nonetheless, it was a relaxing activity. So, with quieter Fall Out Boy playing, Virgil drew, Logan read, Emile and Remy gossiped with Patton, and all was right with the world. Sadly, Logan’s phone decided to disrupt the peace to remind Logan that he had a job. Logan sighed and decided to go to the front counter. Virgil was sketching what appeared to be a beach and Logan hated to disrupt them but he was on a time crunch. “Hey, Virgil,” Logan started, with a softer tone as to not startle the quieter goth, “I was wondering if you could hold onto this book for me to come back in and finish. I am really enjoying it but I have to get to work.”

Virgil looked up, not startled but surprised. He heard Logan’s request and kinda wanted to chuckle because Logan hadn’t thought to ask if he could borrow the book, but Virgil could respect his wish and said, “Absolutely my dude, it is not a problem.” Virgil took the book from Logan and their hands brushed against each other briefly and Virgil was fighting the urge to blush. Logan nodded and fumbled out a goodbye as he backed out, subsequently running into a table, on his way out. Virgil chuckled and tried to convince himself that he didn’t offer to let Logan borrow the book because Virgil wanted Logan to visit again. It took the rest of the day to convince himself of this fact.

Near the end of the day, around what is normally dinner time, Roman busted through the doors and startled Patton. Virgil had left with Remy to grab dinner for the rest of his family and Patton and Emile were left to watch over the bakery. Well, Emile was sitting in his back corner while Patton watched the register and decided if there needed to be more sale goods made or if Virgil should mix dough to bake tomorrow. It was quiet and Patton was a little restless. So Roman’s impromptu entrance was actually appreciated by Patton while Virgil would have scowled. Roman walked up to the front register and put on his blindingly charming smile and Patton couldn’t help but giggle like a girl whose crush just shared that they like someone.

Roman continued walking in and walked to the back where Emile was sitting, which confused Patton. Roman cleared his throat and said, “Hello, my name is Roman. I believe we met last night.”

Emile was a little charmed and smiled as he responded, “Why yes we did.” Emile could also tell the boy was nervous, he kept shuffling his feet and wiping his hands on his pants.

Roman took a second to try to calm down and ask his question. “I was wondering if I could have your permission to take your son, Patton, on a date.” Now Patton was listening by this point and had to keep from gasping in surprise.

Emile smiled and said, “Well, Patton is an adult so you really don’t have to ask me, but if he is fine with it, so am I. I am close to certain my spouse will agree with me and I admire that you asked me but I think the one you really need to ask is by the kitchen door.”

Roman smiled and turned to see Patton peeping and eavesdropping. “Well, Patton, would you like to go on a date with me Friday night?”

Like a deer in headlights, Patton froze before finding his voice to say, “Yes I will.”

Roman smiled and went to hug Patton when the bell above the entrance rang out. Patton rushed out to the front to see if it was a customer, but instead, it was the rest of his family.

Virgil went behind the counter and handed Patton the food they had gotten him and when he finally looked at his brother, Virgil saw his brother’s face lit up with joy, and Virgil knew he was going to be in for a gossip session.

The family ate dinner, with the brothers behind the counter and the parents at a close table. The night finished routinely, with Virgil and Patton cleaning up and Virgil gathering the leftovers for the local shelter. Remy and Emile were staying with Patton that night and Virgil was going to head home afterward.

Virgil was walking back home after visiting the shelter. He was deep in thought when he ran into someone, quite literally. That, someone, happened to be very fit. Logan was that someone. Virgil was quite surprised since he didn’t see Logan outside of the tattoo shop and bakery, but Virgil was not able to form a sentence because the gay part of his brain just went berserk. As previously mentioned, Logan is fit and has a good deal of muscle mass. Virgil also literally ran into him and fell on the ground. So, the anxious, disaster gay was looking for an escape, because flight was his activated instinct. As his eyes scanned the paths of escape, Logan began to speak, “Hey, Virgil. I was not expecting to see you out tonight.”

Somewhere in the anxious fog of his brain, Virgil knew he needed to respond, so he did, “Uh, yeah. Same here. I was dropping some food donations off to the homeless shelter that specifies in helping queer people.”

Logan looked surprised. Then Virgil realized that not everyone uses queer in a friendly sense so he began to explain. “Oh, yeah, I say queer because I believe that some terms need reclaiming and it is a valid label. I, myself, identify as queer.”

Virgil continued to ramble when Logan interrupted, “Virgil, breathe. I was not offended by the use of queer, I like that some are reclaiming it. I didn’t know you donated food to the local homeless shelter, that’s why I looked surprised.”

Virgil breathed, counting so they could calm down. As they calmed down, Logan realized that Virgil was definitely on the verge of a panic attack. So once Virgil had calmed down, Logan offered to walk Virgil to their apartment. Virgil was still a little shaky and agreed. 

The two walked to Virgil's apartment complex and talked. Virgil learned that Logan was a big science nerd and that he liked to misuse slang specifically to annoy Roman. Logan learned that Virgil had always been passionate about baking and that he hadn’t actually found emo music until he was a college student. Those were simple facts and only broad details, however, it brought new depth to their relationship. 

Logan walked Virgil to his front door and waved goodbye as Virgil walked inside. Virgil walked into their apartment, gave a two-fingered salute to Logan (who gave a small wave goodbye), and watched Logan walk away as he closed the door.

“What was that?” Janus asked accusingly.

“Oh, I ran into Logan on my walk home and he offered to walk me home.” Virgil divulged.

“You mean The Logan Croft? The Logan Croft with eyes that are like golden brown honey? With hair that looks like a dark chocolate mousse? By the way, why do you describe him using bakery type foods?” Janus asked, teasing Virgil.

“Yeah, we had a nice conversation on the way home,” Virgil said, baiting Janus with a fishhook of information.

“I think that we need to have a gossip night again, so I will be making the popcorn, you get the drinks,” Janus said, bluntly and full of curiosity.

Virgil chuckled, glad Janus caught the bait. He got up and started to make the hot cocoa, ready to share every detail of the night.

Logan continued walking, tired and happy, indescribably happy. He could definitely try, he knew words, but Virgil elicited a special kind of reaction that he could never begin to decipher. Logan was happy and if he thought about it, maybe he was falling in love. 

Logan was able to make it home safely in his dazed state, and when he got home, he walked into his apartment. He closed the front door and just leaned against the back of the door. Remus happened to hear the door close and looked to see where Logan was. He saw Logan in his starstruck state and felt the need to hopelessly tease rise up in him. “Logan’s got a boyfriend, Logan’s got a boyfriend. Gonna finally get f-,” Remus singsonged until he got cut off.

“Alright, that’s enough. Firstly, I am pan, could easily be a girl or a nonbinary person. Secondly, if you are referring to Virgil, they use they/them and may not want to be referred to as a boyfriend. Thirdly, They likely don’t feel the same,” Logan said, sobering up.

Remus realized that Logan was definitely sensitive about the subject. So, he called Roman into the living room, grabbed some blankets, set a movie up, and went to make cocoa. Tonight was going to be a comfortable gossip night. He texted Janus, saying he may be a bit slow on responding because Logan needed to be listened to.

Both groups had a gossip night, though one was more lighthearted and the other was more of a rant session, both parties ended up feeling more satisfied with how they felt and hopeful that their feelings were reciprocated.

To Be Continued

Hi. This is my birthday gift to myself because I'm now an adult legally and I can do what I want.

[fleckcmscott]

Watch What Happens - Chapter 13

Chapter links: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12

Summary: Arthur, an aspiring comedian, has struggled to find normalcy and compassion his entire life. Y/N, a hard-working paralegal and transplant to Gotham, has just been put on a case for the Wayne Foundation. When they meet, unexpected sparks fly.

Chapter warning: Adult Situation, Swearing, Angst, Brief mention of past self-harm

Words: 2,501

The train line to Arthur's apartment wasn't yet running when he left Y/N's place. He had to walk home, which he didn’t mind. The cold air helped clear his head as he went, smoking all the way. There weren't many people on the streets this early. A newspaper stand owner was readying his shop. A few homeless people were on steps, wrapped up and trying to keep warm. Some construction workers were walking by, carrying signs.

Arthur looked at every single one of them as he passed. Could they finally see him? Did they know what had happened? Was Gotham able to tell his life had been turned on its head in the past twenty-four hours?

He giggled lightly. I got laid. No. Even as that phrase came to him, it felt crude, wrong. He was ashamed he'd even thought of it. Almost a week ago, Gary had told him to be a gentleman - a gentleman would never say something like that. But he didn’t know how he was supposed to think about what had occurred. He speculated as to whether he'd merely fucked Y/N or made love to her. Slight panic filled him as he realized he needed it to be the latter.

As Arthur passed by, he stopped in front of the grocery where he'd first run into her. It wasn't open yet. But he wanted to relive the experience. His eyelids shut as he remembered the small talk she’d made, her stare, her quiet “night.” Those small gestures, which had seemed natural and easy for her, had started a pattern that captured him. And he didn't want to be let loose.

When he reached the foreboding stairs that led to his home, he sighed and surveyed them. Every time he trudged up them it was a choice. A choice to not give into the negative thoughts and anger that plagued him. This morning, thinking of Y/N, imagining she would be at his apartment waiting to greet him with a kiss, made ascending the concrete a little easier.

When he got home, he followed his usual routine of getting into his house clothes, putting his laundry in the hamper, and checking on Penny. Thankfully, she was still asleep. Before sitting down at the breakfast bar with his journal, he grabbed a cookie (one of the chocolate chip Y/N had brought over) and a short glass of milk. Once situated, he opened the notebook to what he had been writing at her apartment, pondering.

When he had been in his early twenties, he'd kissed a girl, once. She'd been a co-worker at one of his gigs. It had been an impulsive act and nothing ever came of it. But he'd held onto that memory for years, until he'd understood no woman would ever have an interest in him. He'd tried, and failed, to shield himself by not hoping.

Kissing Y/N was different. She said he made her happy, claimed he turned her on. She'd been unbelievably responsive to his touch. And the way she’d begged him to fill her... "Arthur...I need you inside me." Goosebumps broke out at his recollections. He was thankful for the guidance she’d given him. It had been enough for him to feel like a participant instead of the novice he was.

Later, the sensation of her throbbing against his mouth when she came, knowing he had done that to her, had been one of the only times he had ever felt powerful. They'd both gotten up off her couch a little shakily. She'd still looked blissful and somewhat dazed. He smiled as he remembered how her lips had pulled at him, then parted as she moaned. ("She was so noisie! I can never bring her over. Penny woud heer everything.") He still couldn’t fathom how she hadn't minded when his cock chose not to cooperate. And that she’d asked him to come over again - tonight!

She’d offered the use of her shower, and he’d gladly accepted. As he'd watched her pick out towels for him, standing there in her bathrobe and bare feet, he'd been unable to speak. She must have noticed, because she'd kissed his nose and asked if he was all right. He'd nodded.

He'd had to use her shampoo, resulting in his hair smelling like strawberries. Vaguely, he wondered if he smelled like a woman. But he decided he didn't care - the scent kept her closer. He'd wanted to shave, but she only had a wet razor hanging on the shower wall. Since his most recent release from Arkham, he'd used an electric shaver. The therapist and doctor there had advised him not to keep other types of razors in his apartment. Blinking, he’d turned away from it, deciding to shave at home.

After getting dressed and leaving the bathroom, Arthur had found Y/N in the kitchen. She'd put coffee on and two mugs were on the counter. It was a snapshot of domesticity he never thought he'd get to experience in his wretched life. They'd stood together in front of the stove while she made toast and burned scrambled eggs. He was proud of himself for having taken only five or so seconds to put his arm around her back at the waist. Then he’d tried to distract himself from wondering if it was all right by sipping his drink.

She’d leaned into him with her hip, looked up, and said, “I never noticed your sideburns before.” She’d rubbed at one gently, then moved her hand to his chin and pulled him to her for a quick peck. “They’re cute.” He hadn’t said anything in response to the sudden compliment, still suspicious of the idea that a woman, even Y/N, could find any part of him “cute.” Averted eyes and a slight, toothy grin had been all he’d managed.

When she’d served breakfast, he hadn't had the heart to tell her he wasn't hungry. He’d enjoyed the raspberry jam on his toast - he usually only bought grape, it being the cheapest option. And even though the eggs were terrible, he’d smothered them with ketchup and eaten them. She'd been talking the entire time, telling him about her upcoming day and asking about his. But he'd only half heard her. He was too busy trying to figure out how he was ever going to interact with her normally after all this.

His eyebrows pinched. Even before his first breakdown, connections had been impossible for him to make, and Arkham hadn’t exactly been a place to seek warmth. For so many years, he'd yearned for someone, to matter to that person and know what it was to love them. He was at a loss as to what to do now that he had it. If he had it.

Changing the context of how he thought of himself to include not only mentally ill loner but also potential romantic partner, would be a mindfuck. He wasn’t sure he was up to the task. And he knew he had nothing to offer besides his problems and his heart, whatever that was worth. He hoped it would be sufficient.

Holding his pen, he bit his lip. He wouldn't be able to take back the words once they were out. Carefully, writing as clearly as he could, he let the ink touch the paper. "I think I love Y/N. Shud I tell her? What if its to soon? I don't want her to be upset." Staring at what he'd written, Arthur let out a long breath and lit a cigarette. Then, smiling, he put his head down as his eyes welled up. He wiped at them hastily.

He had left Y/N’s apartment reluctantly. Even after her invitation, he felt as though stepping out her front door would wake him up from a dream he’d never return to. The solid feeling of her lips on his, her tongue teasing his mouth for entry when they'd kissed goodbye, helped assure him there'd be more. Part of him had wanted to tell her he loved her, like he'd just written in his notebook. It would have been nice to experience saying it to someone. But he'd forced himself to hold back. That was a vulnerability he couldn’t allow. Not yet. But he hoped she'd been able to see it in his eyes and feel it in how he'd touched her.

As he took a drag off his cigarette, he crossed out the word "think" and replaced it with "kno."

Arthur had come dangerously close to confessing everything to her. It would have been a relief to get it out the way. To have her end it if she decided he was too much of a mess to take on, which he assumed was likely. But he hadn't been able to go through with it. And the permission she'd given him to keep his secrets, even though she'd told him she wanted to know him, had been confusing. Now he wasn't sure how much she actually wanted to learn.

But she kept asking so many questions.

He didn't know what he was obligated to tell her. That one of the few times Penny had paid attention was when he'd been hitting his head against the shower wall? That she’d had him committed more than once? He wasn't upset with Penny for that - he was grateful she’d momentarily cared enough to stop him from hurting himself. But on many days he wondered why. Arthur Fleck was a meaningless speck. Born to be put upon and feel bad while trying to take care of his mother and deal with whatever other shit life decided to throw at him.

Taking a deep breath to quell his mind, his eyes shut. Sitting there all day, counting down the minutes until Y/N touched him again, wasn't going to help. There was vacuuming that needed to be done. The bathroom had to be cleaned. And he needed to start his day so he could go out and find a job.

He'd cut back on groceries, changing from seltzer to tap water, buying white instead of wheat bread, getting TV dinners that were marked down because they were close to expiring. But it was still difficult to maintain his meager savings. Maybe he could pick up a spare shift at Amusement Mile. It was the off season, but there had to be work to do.

He wrote another line in his journal before closing it: “Gotta work on more jokes. No time to waste."

After getting up from the breakfast bar, Arthur padded into the kitchen to start Penny's Farina porridge. Still pretty full from Y/N's delightfully awful cooking, he started making Penny an extra portion. He felt a twinge of remorse for having left her alone all night. He knew he was all she had. Until four weeks ago, she'd been all he'd had, too.

Once he was in the bedroom, he opened the window shade and sat in the chair next to her. He studied her face before reaching out, wondering if she would be proud of him if she knew what had happened. Then he peeled the blanket back and touched her hand. "Mom, come on,” he said gently. “It's time to wake up."  

Her eyelids started to flutter; she eventually focused on him. "Happy."

He gulped, concentrating on her face. Ask how I am. I finally have something good to say. I did my act! I'm in love! He was sure he looked as desperate as he felt. Please notice me…

It took her a few seconds to sit up. "Happy, I wrote a new letter. It's on the coffee table."

Sighing, he turned to look out the window. "Okay." After nodding to himself, he stood and helped her out of bed, lifting her light frame gently until she was stably on her feet.

As he guided her to the living room, she spoke. "You smell like perfume."

He smiled, the hurt in his chest softening a bit. "That's because I was with Y/N. I had a big date." A big overnight date, he thought with pride, then laughed as he blushed. He deposited Penny on her usual chair and flicked on the TV. On the way back to the kitchen, he grabbed the envelope. As he got out a bowl, he studied the letter. What on earth could his mother be constantly writing to Thomas Wayne about? He checked briefly to make sure she wasn't paying attention, then opened it, his back to the living room.

His reading wasn't the best, and it took him time to take in the words on the page. "Your son..." "Our son..." He reread those key phrases, thinking he must be mistaken. As he went further, his grip on the papers tightened. "Arthur is a good boy." His jaw clenched. "...how happy he is most of the time." "I love you forever, Penny Fleck."

Slowly, he folded the letter back together and stuffed it in its envelope. Despite the deep breath he took, he couldn't stop the confusion, anger, and hint of excitement from blooming in him. A scowl came across his face as he tried to control himself, failing already.

Arthur slammed his fist on the counter, knocking the bowl on it to the floor with a crash.

Penny called from the living room. "Happy, what happened? Did you hurt yourself again?"

"How come you never told me?" he yelled, going to the living room entrance.  

She stood from the chair, pointing at him. "Is that my letter? You have no right opening my mail!"

He slowly advanced on her. "How could you keep this from me?"

Penny ran into the bathroom, faster than he'd seen her move in years. "You're gonna kill me. You're gonna give me a heart attack!" she shrieked, slamming the door and locking it.

"I'll give you a-" he followed her and pounded on the door, then jiggled the handle.

"I'm not talking to you until you stop being angry!" she yelled.

Immediately, he withdrew, pacing back and forth. "Okay. Okay," he said meekly. "I'm not angry, Mom," he said calmly, shoulders tightening as he approached the bathroom again. "I'm not angry." Leaning in, he put his hand on the door. "Please. Mom. Is this real?"

There was a long pause before her muffled voice came through the wood. "He's an extraordinary man, Happy. A very powerful man." Arthur stared at the door in disbelief. "We were in love. He said it was best that we not be together because of appearances."

When he leaned his head against the door, he sighed. "And I could never tell anyone-," she continued, "-because. Well, I signed some papers." His eyes drifted shut. "And besides, you can imagine what people would say about Thomas and me. And what they'd say about you."

His answer came quietly, voice rough with emotion. "What would they say, mom?"

He heard her intake of breath before she answered. "That you're an unwanted bastard."

Tag list (Let me know if you want to be added!): @harmonioussolve​ @clowndaddyfleck​ @sweet-nothings04​ @stephieraptorr​ @rommies​ @invisiblewispofwhimsey @let-the-stars-fall-in-the-abyss​

[deathstakes]

How to be Buffy Summers — A Slayer How-To Guide: Tips, tricks and wood chips.

PREFACE: So you want to be the Slayer, huh? Well, newsflash. Everyone wants to be the hero. In the movies, it is flashy and cool. Well, here is a newsflash. Slaying isn’t exactly glam-o-rama. The movies really pump up the whole what it is like to be a hero, and let me tell you, it isn’t as cute.

Disclaimer: You might have heard a lot from the fang-population. They like to spread their gossip faster than a bunch of ladies sipping their afternoon tea. I’m here to clear the rumours and give you the insiders scoop.

I am more than just the Slayer. I am also Buffy. They go hand in hand like…. Hands going in hand. I like my weapons as much as I love a good sale. There’s nothing wrong with liking pink, dressing cute and also being able to kick some major ass, and trust me, if you ever doubt it, I can show you what a Slayer really is.

TIPS, TRICKS AND WOODCHIPS

1. There is nothing fashionable about eye bags. Concealer is your best friend.

Patrol usually ends around 3 a.m, if the vampires aren’t biting much. If I am lucky, I get about four hours of sleep a night, and if I am even luckier those four hours are free of nightmares or weird, cryptic-y apocalyptic messages. Most of the time, I am not, and my dreams aren’t steamy with Swayze but the uglies, but we never go past second base because they always seem to die when they try to handle my stake.

Those sleepless nights are going to make you want to wear a caffeine drip. Speaking of, coffee will be your other best friend. Thank me later.

Oh, and you’re also going to need a concealer for the bruises. Trust me on this, you’re going to find bruises in places you didn’t even know you could have bruises. Those rough tumbles aren’t without consequence. Sure, they’ll go away in a bit, but in the meantime, do what Elsa said. Conceal, don’t feel. Cover it with translucent powder to really set it in and don’t forget to colour correct! This works for both bruises and for those vampire bites. Totally hickey-proof.

2. Sisterly duties.

Make sure Dawn is up for the school day. I used to get up much easier, in my opinion. Also, remember to pack a stake in her lunch and some holy water, just in case. You never know when she is going to need them considering she has a habit of getting kidnapped every other Tuesday. Replenish the supply every so often and get your witchy best friend to put in protection trinkets that you can slip into her backpack.

IMPORTANT: When it comes to her safety, nothing is off limits, at all. Monsters will play dirty if they have to, and the ones closest to you are the most susceptible. It’s a hard knock life.

3. Because this gig isn’t really big on the paying front, you also need a day job. Glamorous.

Remember that thing about how being a superhero isn’t like how it is in the movies. I was being dead serious about that. There isn’t a batmobile or really cool headquarters, unless you want to count the Magic Shop, and oh, that thing about getting paid? Hah. Yeah, you’re not really going to be rolling in the dough unless it is cookie dough. It is a whole, long-winded thing, so just make sure you have some resistance to temptation when you see a really, really good shoe sale. I am talkin’ goes with everything, cute but also practical heel. Don’t do it.

You might have to play pool shark, might need to flip some burgers and learn how to give your Buffy best smile while being dead inside, or you might need to bust an undercover demon black market. Get creative. Just don’t rob a bank. Morals still apply, you know.

TIP: Having a boyfriend who is good at forging credit cards is really helpful. Though, sometimes, he gets too crafty with the aliases.

4. Unchipped manicures? Puh-lease.

I’m going to give it to you straight, so it doesn’t get hard later on. You know that feeling of freshly painted nails? Don’t get used to it. There has yet to be a patrol that I go on that doesn’t end up with me chipping my polish.You’d think someone would get into the market for this stuff and break the bank, but nope. Well, considering I would probably be their only customer... Don’t even think about acrylics, who has the time and also, not great for grip. Gel? You’d think it would hold, but let me tell you, not even the best formula can stand against the roughest of tumbles.

Having pretty, polished nails was nice while it lasted. That isn’t to say I don’t do my nails, now, because I do. I’m not letting fangs take that away from me. They already took away my sleep.

5. Healing.

So, right about now, you might be starting to realize that being a superhero isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be. So, let me throw in a decent thing. This isn’t to get recruits or anything. This job position is filled until further notice (or until I get the axe.) One of the good things about the gig is that you heal faster. That isn’t to say you don’t get hurt, because oh boy, do you get hurt. The pain aspect is still there, but you’ll heal a broken bone in days compared to weeks only to break it again. I’ve made with the stabby, and gotten out of the hospital the same night because I was healing quickly. Other than the limping, the bruises that go away in a day or two and the scars are barely there scars, you’re golden.

But that doesn’t mean that I am invincible.

If Slayers were invincible, I wouldn’t be here.

I still have my scars (the ones that can be seen) on my neck. From the Master, from Angel and those couple rounds with Dracula that I went, but that’s for another time. The naked eye can’t really see them, but get me under some great selfie taking lighting and it's there, just a sheen paler than my skin tone.

TIP: If you are trying to hide fresh ones, try scarves. Fashionable, but practical. Ascots if you’re into looking like Fred Jones, hubba hubba.

6. The weapon of the tongue. No, not that weapon.

Anyone can learn high kicks and how to throw a punch. Well, most anyone, anyways. But if you really want to know the inner workings of how to be Buffy, try me on for size. I only come in a small, though. When I do my rounds, I like to provide a double feature slayer combo, you know? Throw in a pun or two between my punches, give them a real show. You know why? It gets them going. It drives them crazy, and they get angry. That anger helps fuel the whole show. Also, I am great at talking circles, so sometimes, you just keep going and going and watch their undead brains try to scramble it together, and while they are doing that?

PRESTO-POOF-O.

It really is a Buffy skill, even if Giles doesn’t think so.

Well, except when it gets me in trouble because part of being me is realizing that my mouth speaks faster than my brain tends to comprehend and then it just becomes a whole intangible tangent that really shouldn’t even be called a tangent, because really, who---

7. Sacrificing fashion for slayage.

This one hurts me to write. This one hurts me because it is still something I struggle with, but what can I say? I’m a lifelong learner, dedicated to becoming the best. Nerd alert. There was a time when I used to dress cute. You know, the minis and the halters? The to-die-for booties? Well, guess what? Long gone are those days. Now, I aim for pr… for… prac… for practical. Sorry, it is still a touchy thing.

That doesn’t mean you still can’t dress cute, because you totally can. Have I given up my style? Nope, not a chance, and hey, sometimes my halters still see the life of patrol because I believe when we look and feel our best, we slay the best (Can I get an amen?) I wear booties all the time, but it’s because I know how to run in heels.

Body con dresses and tight skirts? Save them for a day you aren’t slaying, because otherwise, you’ll be sitting in a bank and suddenly be faced with a bank-robbing demon and you’ll have to slit your favorite pencil skirt with shears so you have enough leg room to fly-kick that ugly.

That was a nice skirt, it was.

8. Accessorizing is important.

It is no secret that accessorizing can make an outfit go from nay to yay. Come on, that is a given. But, being the Slayer, there are some accessories I have to make sure that I am wearing at all times. Keeping a cross on you all the time would be too bulky, and it isn’t for the religious aspect of things, so what do I do? Cross necklaces, chokers, rings or little dangly earrings can be the perfect way of making a vampire weak in the knees. Also, punching with rings really hits differently. For them, not me.

Keep some scarves on you, too, because well, it isn’t any of my business what happens to your necks, fangy or not.

TIP: Scrunchies? Make great face flingers if you need a real quick distraction to get out of a fangy situation. Just some tricks of the trade, you are welcome.

9. That appetite.

Let’s get personal, here. You think that you’re going to do all that cardio and vamp-ass slayage and not feel like you could eat a horse? Oh, it’s bad. Sometimes, the first thing I do when I am done patrol is hit whatever place is open or go straight for the fridge. It’s never cravings for a salad, either, nope. It’s 3 a.m, and all you want is a stack of double chocolate chip pancakes, some sunny side up eggs, hash and extra greased up bacon, maybe even some triple scoop chocolate shakes.

Dawn says she always feels like she is interrupting the fridge and I when she walks in on us, because my head is just always sticking inside it, but what do kids know, huh?

Also… there is another kind of appetite. This is why this book isn’t in the kids section. We’re all grown ups here. Sometimes, all you need is to get rid of that tickle that seems to always find a place. It’s explosive until you give in and have to do something about it. It’s kind of why I prefer solo-slaying, it gets real intimate.

A low-fat yogurt does the trick, too.

10. Weapons, ooh.

So, we talked about the power of words, but here comes the good stuff. Let me tell you, nothing feels good as the first poof after a freshly shaven stake. I never thought I would ever admit to that, but here we are. It is important to always keep your weapons ready to fight like it was the end of the world, because most times? It is.

Try to keep a knife in your boots. Pockets are important because you can slip in stakes discreetly enough, but don’t make them too bulky. Keep important spells on your phone because you’re not carrying around books everywhere you go. Never forget your phone, your gloss, crosses and holy water. You know, the essentials.

My favourite weapon? My precious baby. My scythe. It looks sweet and is just as killer. I like it for its double functionality because it does both the beheading mucho smoothly and the point of the stake? Talk about hot.

…. Yes, we all get attached to our weapons.

As for guns, they are still pointless.

Keep your weapons hidden. Somewhere they won’t be found. I went through storing them in places I knew my mom wouldn’t bother looking (crosses and holy water vials between the bookshelves, stakes in the closet…) Maybe build a trunk for it, for all your storage needs. This is where I plug Xander Harris. He built me a beautiful trunk on my 21st birthday. Give him a call.

11. Do NOT sleep with vampires.

So, here’s the thing. I don’t want to be a hypocrite but, sometimes, I just have to say it. Do not sleep with the enemy. Here’s the thing. I get it. I know. There’s this whole mysterious aspect to it, and sometimes at the end of it all, you just want to knock your boots with someone, BUT DO NOT SLEEP WITH THE UNDEAD. It never works out good for anyone. There are too many complications, like the loss of souls and dignity. The only shaft they should be getting worked is the stake.

There are plenty of living, breathing, normal human fish in the sea.

Seriously, screw vampires. By that, I mean don’t.

This message was brought to you in part by the Learn from Buffy’s Mistakes Association, because clearly she never did.

12. Don’t let it turn you into stone.

I’m going to get real with you. Being the Slayer… it is so easy to cut yourself off. From the world and everyone around you, because you think that it is easier that way. That it’ll hurt less if you keep this unbudging wall between you and the people you care about. Somewhere along the way, the hard heartens from all the losses that turn you into a ghost of who you were. Somewhere along the way, you stop wearing your heart on your sleeve because you’re not that innocent or naive girl anymore.

Being the slayer… it makes me different. It makes me different in a way that I don’t think anyone will ever truly understand, even when they say they do. I’m not saying that because I think highly of myself or I am trying to keep people at bay. It is just the way it is. This is a fight that belongs to the Chosen One, even when she didn’t ask to be Chosen.

It is about trying to find that balance. For a long time, I cut myself off, and sometimes I still find myself having a hard time letting other people in because I tend to swallow in myself when things get hard. I don’t like putting that on other people… they deal with enough just by slayer association. Now, I try.

I try to embrace the way my emotions give me power, the way they make me feel, even when I feel the most vulnerable - even more than I am mid-battle.

13. Don’t fight it, just accept it. - stop being so hard on yourself, you’re one girl.

One girl in all the world...

I used to hate it. I used to despise Destiny and wanted to give it the finger. For a long time, I hated this life. Hell, there are still times when I wish I wasn’t ‘the One.’ Being the one sucks, sometimes. The losses, the sacrifices, the constant worrying about everyone around you?

It hits harder when I think about the ones I couldn’t save. Yeah, I saved a bunch of people, but what about the ones I couldn’t? That is on me and only me. This is the heavy, so-not-star spangled stuff that sleeps with me every night. The guilt. The could-haves, the should-haves…

I have grown from not accepting this role to embracing what I bring as the Slayer. I know I am damn good at it, total humble-brag. Hey, longest lived for a reason, okay. My stats are impressive.

Sure, there are days where my bones are downright tired. There’s an ache I can’t really explain, and hurt that never goes away and sits in my chest. I have to remind myself that if it is not me, then it is some other girl and I want to save that girl and have her live a normal life for just a little bit longer, you know? She might have something important to get to. She might be Dawn’s age. I could never do that to her.

Every day, I am doing the best I can. There’s only me, and sometimes, only me needs to cut herself a break. Just like most everyone needs to cut themselves a break, sometimes. Have a break, have a Kit-Kat.

*** BONUS TIP: Practice safe necks. Just, please, people. We live in Sunnydale, this should be obvious. Don’t give into Sunnydale Syndrome, have a little awareness.*

CONCLUSION: There you have it, folks. A little intel about the oh so (not) glamorous life of a Slayer. Not coming to a theatre nowhere near you because books on my life are enough, thank you very much. If you have any questions, please contact your local library or that idiot named Carver Edlund. Spam him, spam him good, maybe even send him some hate-mail while you are at it.

END NOTE: If Giles finds this, I repeat, I did not write this. This was written by someone else who knows way too much about me. Probably Dawn because she reads my diary all the time.

                                                                      A Buffy Summers Publication ™

[heamarvel]

Holiday Movie Challenge Prompt and Badge lists

Hellooooo shippers of all Marvel ships!

This marks the kickoff to HEA (Happily Ever After) Marvel’s Holiday Movie Challenge! If you don’t know us, we’re a group of crafty mods under the direction of our own personal Pepper Potts ( @betheflame​​ ), so really, this is going to be great fun, and we hope that you’ll join us!

A brief intro to our event:

At no point do you need to sign up for this event. You are not beholden to post anything, even if you say that you will. This is a guiltless, fun event!

Pick a prompt, any prompt!

Interpret the prompt any which way you wish. We have prompt examples available for people to peruse on our blog and on our Discord, if you’re in need of a few examples.

Write (or art, podfic, or moodboard, etc.) any ship you want, even polyamorous relationships of any number or type (even if the prompts contain just two characters!).

Include additions from our badge list if you wish! They function like video game achievements (think World of Warcraft, or Xbox) and you will be rewarded with little achievement badges designed by the wonderful @kocuria​ that you can display anywhere you please.

The collection will open on November 1st and close on December 24th.

Around then we will provide a Google form to submit the badge info and other info for your fic.

BUT REMEMBER! All contributions to this event must have a Happily Ever After as per holiday movie standards (doesn’t mean there can’t be tons of angst and pain in the middle, though).

For any further info, please check out our Holiday Movie Challenge page, our Prompt and Badge page, our Frequently Asked Questions page, or ask us questions on Tumblr, Twitter, or on Discord! (Links on Tumblr.) 

But that’s enough mod-splaining, let’s take a look under the cut at the prompts and badges that we’ve been eagerly waiting to share with you!

*We have included both (1) images to download and save as well as (2) text for those who prefer or need that medium! The images are at the bottom of this post.

Here’s a separate post with just the images.

Prompts

1. Character A is a big city lawyer who swore to never go back to their hometown. Suddenly, their grandfather dies and leaves them the family Christmas Tree farm. They’re determined to go back and shut down the farm. Character B runs the farm and is determined to save it.

2. After losing their job as an au pair in New York, Character A accepts a position as a nanny in the castle of a small European principality no one has ever heard of. Character B is a single parent & ruler of the country.

3. When architect and Christmas amateur Character A finds themselves hosting their family for Christmas, they recruit holiday coordinator Character B to bring holiday joy to their home.

4. A high-powered executive reconsiders their priorities when car trouble leads them to Christmas Valley, a town in love with Christmas.

5. Two new students at nearby university, Character A and Character B, meet the first day of classes and become study partners. A local bookstore becomes a close part of their lives as their relationship grows.

6. Character A - a famous author who writes about how to stay single - is forced to look after their niece and nephew over the holidays. With the help of their Christmas-loving neighbor, Character B, they learn to find love and the Christmas spirit.

7. A young royal (Character A) escapes their entourage to explore New York City over Christmas. They meet Character B who shows the beautiful stranger their side of the city.

8. As Christmas approaches, Character A (the Lizzie Bennet character), a New York event planner, is sent to a quaint, small town to organize their holiday festival. When they arrive, they find Character B (the Darcy character), a high-profile billionaire lacking in holiday spirit, in the process of selling the charming estate they hoped to use as a venue.

9. An anxious bride-to-be (Character A, “bride” is non-gender assigned) throws in with broken-hearted and cynical Character B and a happily married couple for an emergency ride to NYC from New England.

10. Character A has to go to their cousin’s holiday wedding that’s taking place a year to the day they were left at the altar. Unable to face going alone, they con Character B into going “just as friends.”

11. When a restless young married Character A is granted a wish by a Christmas Angel to be single again, they soon discover their new life isn't what they bargained for, and embark on a quest to win Character B back.

12. Character A and Character B have been archrivals ever since a memorable fight over a coveted Christmas recital solo in elementary school. Now adults, they work side-by-side at the same school where they still constantly compete over everything. As the holiday season approaches, the entire school is getting into the spirit with the annual fundraising festival, which will feature an exciting new event - a teacher Christmas Cookie Bake-Off, judged by a tough five-star chef.

13. Character A inherited a toy factory. The town needs the factory to stay open, but they have no interest in being tied to their hometown. Especially when they find out that Character B - who broke their heart in high school - is the town’s mayor.

14. A WWII era nurse (Character A) is transported in time to 2019 and meets Character B who helps them discover the bonds of family and that the true meaning of Christmas is timeless.

15. Stranded at an airport at Christmastime, Character A accepts a ride from Character B, who has just rented the last car in town.

Badges

Length

500

1k

5k

10k

15k

20k+

Ships

We’ll be custom-making the badges for whatever ship you choose to bring to the table! (Just keep in mind our limits: no underage, no non-con, no nazis.) Popular ship or rarepair+, this group of multishipping mods would love to see whatever you choose to write!

General fic elements

Baking/Cooking

Needing a passport

Non-abled character

Neuro-diverse character

Passes the Bechdel Test

Set outside the United States

Addresses a legitimate societal ill/charity/cause

Character learns a craft as a coping mechanism

Someone eats popcorn in a dramatic scene

Mention or include a Hallmark store or movie

Character is tracing their genealogy

Character writes fanfiction

Character learns a new skill

NSFW

A/B/O

Sentinels & Guides

Soulmate-Identifying Marks

Historical AU: Scottish or Irish clans

Historical AU: Ancient Rome or Greece

Historical AU: Regency or Victorian

Historical AU: American West

Inclusion of animal other than a dog, cat, or horse

‘It Takes a Village’ (town or community helps them hook up)

Use of holiday other than Christmas - including non-winter holidays

One sentence or more spoken in a language other than Russian

Discussion on classic literature and/or classic rock ‘n’ roll

Write a pairing you’ve never written before

Holiday Movie and general tropes

Inversion/Subversion of any trope

Main character has a cuddly dog

Presence of a small town festival

'And they were roommates!'

Fake Relationship

Only One Bed

Snowball fight

Ice skating or Ice hockey

Interrupted first kiss

Stories from childhood

Sassy/nosy best friend

Conniving co-worker

Kid as matchmaker

Single parent

Holiday specific

Yule log

Playing Dreidel

Holiday movie pick: Die Hard

Use of the phrase “Santa! I know him!”

Home Alone style shenanigans, serious or not

Trying to balance an egg on the Solstice

A non-Jewish character mixes up Passover and Hanukkah

Writing format/style

Outsider POV

First Person POV

Text Message/Chat Room

3+ perspectives in one story

Dialogue Only

Epistolary

Avengers stereotypes/fanon

Thor is foreign

Bots as children

Tony has insomnia

Tony Is Worthy (of Mjolnir)

Tony as a non-Iron Man mechanic

Ceiling vent Clint Barton

Budapest Explanation

Natasha is a scary spy/likes sneaking

Super-Nanny Phil Coulson

Peter Parker being a klutz

Peter and Shuri team up on Tony

Bruce has anger management problems

Avengers Movie Night

Darcy uses her taser

Bucky speaks Russian

Steve and/or Bucky need to play catch up on modern and pop culture

Shrunkyclunks (Modern Steve/CA & non-Avenger Bucky)

Shrinkyclinks (Modern Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier & non-CA Steve)

Side Character speaking role (any apply): Dr. Doom, Reed Richards, Galactus, Ghost Rider, Frank Castle, any Inhuman, any Runaway, Sif or one of the Warriors Three, Frigga, Amora or Lorelei

Set in a Marvel canon universe (even if not canon-compliant), for example: 1872, Noir

Mod Requests

Supernatural creatures

Gender swapped MC

Someone wears a tiara

Someone wears a kimono

Long-distance relationship

Snuggling to keep warm

1940s AU

Disclaimer: The above plot summaries in the prompt list belong to numerous movies in the Hallmark catalogue. We do not claim to own them, and are not making any money off of this, nor are we being paid by Hallmark to run this event.

Additionally, as of December 14th, 2019, we are no longer associating with Hallmark even in name, due to their poor choice to cave to pressure and remove an advertisement of a gentle, loving same-sex kiss occurring at their own wedding. We cannot and will not abide that.

[ronninoir]

Can I Steal You for a Second? CH6

Summary: Adrien is forced to participate in a new dating show, but becomes more excited when Ladybug says she’ll participate as her civilian self.

AKA: AU where Adrien doesn’t know Marinette, the superheroes are 22 and Gabriel is mean and ruthless but not Hawkmoth.

Read on AO3

Chapter 6

By the time Marinette became conscious again, it was almost noon. Tikki was the one who pulled her from her slumbers and she was very annoyed about it.

“Tiiiiiiiikiiiiiiiiii,” Marinette groaned. She peeked one eye out and then quickly sat up in bed, once she remembered where she was. She glanced around and noticed that (thankfully!) she was the only one in the room, so no one heard her say her kwami’s name. Marinette’s voice quickly shifted to a whisper, “Tikki! What are you doing? Someone could see you!”

“I’m so sorry, Marinette, but I’m really hungry. And since you’re meeting up with Chat tonight I need to start saving up my energy.” Tikki explained in a whisper. “I did wait until your roommate left though.”

“Oh, okay. Well that was good thinking.” Marinette said with a yawn. She normally stayed up late finishing varying designs but last night was a whole different kind of exhaustion. She doesn’t normally have to socialize so late into the night and the stress and tension level in the mansion tired her out as well. “Let me get dressed and I’ll find you something sweet to eat, okay?” Tikki gave her a nod and flew away into Marinette’s suitcase.

Marinette threw on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt, something she would normally wear on a Sunday at home. She slipped on some flats as well, just because she wasn’t familiar with the mansion and it would make her feel more comfortable. After brushing her teeth and putting her hair in her signature pigtails, she ran downstairs in search of food.

It was only their first day in the mansion and she already could feel the dislike and animosity between the other girls. It was hanging in the air like a fog and it caused Marinette’s pace to slow as she neared the bottom of the stairs. No one seemed to be fighting. There was no yelling, no cameras and not a boy in sight. In fact, there wasn’t any sound coming from anywhere in the mansion. Marinette almost thought that everyone must still be asleep.

She didn’t encounter another human being until the kitchen. There were 3 girls sitting around the island. They weren’t talking or looking at each other and only one of them was eating.

“Good morning,” Marinette said hesitantly as she walked in the room. Her house was never this quiet or hostile. Her parents were up at 4:30 prepping things for the bakery and whenever she woke up there was always some sort of noise, either coming from the bakery, or from her mom making breakfast for her in the kitchen. She was always greeted with a “Good morning,” and either a hug or a kiss on her head.

All of the girls looked up at her, but none of them said a thing. Marinette forced a smile and said, “I’m Marinette.”

That caused one of the girls to give a cruel laugh and she responded with a, “We know.” Marinette paused a minute before remembering that of course they knew who she was, she got the first impression rose last night. All of the girls in the house know who she is. Unsure of how to continue, she decided small talk was better than no talk.

“How did you sleep?” She said, forcing a cheery voice as she headed to the fridge and began looking for something to make for lunch. She almost forgot what she was doing when she saw the fridge stocked with a large amount of food. There was virtually nothing sweet in there though, so the search for Tikki’s lunch was going to have to be conducted elsewhere. She located some ham, bread, an egg, and a block of cheese and set to work.

The girls chorused a “fine” and then didn’t speak again. Marinette pulled out a frying pan and some oil and began heating it on the stovetop. She then put the ham and cheese on top of the bread. The girls just stared at Marinette and didn’t say a word. She hardened her resolve to remain polite before she turned around with a smile and asked, “What are your names again? There was so much happening last night, I was having trouble keeping everyone straight.”

This comment seemed to be too much for one of the girls as she got up and stormed away. Another got up and followed her leaving only two. The last one, a girl with medium-length blonde hair and a kind face, sighed and smiled apologetically at Marinette. “I’m sorry it’s been a bit of transition for Gabrielle.” She pointed in the direction of where the first two girls went. “She shares a room with Lila and she hasn’t stopped making snide comments about Gabrielle.” This girl shifted uncomfortable in her seat before spitting out, “Of course, that doesn’t bother me, so can you just not tell Lila I said that?”

Marinette was very confused and almost forgot to put her egg in the pan when it was warm enough. As she cracked it with the grace of someone who has been cooking/baking since she was a child, she tried to process what the girl had said. Why would she feel as though she needed to tell Lila anything? Deciding it was better just to ask, she then turned back towards the girl, “I’m sorry, what are you talking about? Why would I tell Lila anything?”

The girl wouldn’t meet Marinette’s eyes when she said, “Well you are her best friend, we just don’t want to start any trouble. Especially with Lila.” Marinette almost dropped her spatula. Marinette, best friends with Lila of all people?! She’s disliked this girl since their interview weekend a couple months back. How could they get that idea? Soon, Marinette realized that Lila must have said something. Marinette was racking her brain, thinking of what she could have done last night to make Lila think they were friends. She came up blank.

“Did Lila tell you this?” Marinette inquired, trying not to sound too incredulous.

“Umm, yeah. She told the whole house this morning when everyone had woken up. She kept going on and on about how you two had entered the show together and hoped you’d both make it and that you both planned to be top two and have Adrien fight over the two of you.” The more this girl talked, the more Marinette got angry. Why would she say all of these things? Why would Lila lie about knowing her? Marinette took the egg, which had fried while she was thinking and slipped it on top of the bread, ham and cheese combination she had made. She plated it and walked around to the other side of the island and sat next to the girl.

“Okay, well let you be the first to know that I am not Lila’s friend. I’ve never met Lila before the interview a couple months back. Honestly, her attitude bothers me. I don’t appreciate people who manipulate others and that’s all I’ve seen Lila do since I met her. I really don’t like people who lie either, specifically about me.” She took a rather aggressive bite of her sloppily thrown together croque madame. The girl’s mouth had dropped and she stared at Marinette with wide eyes.

“She lied?” The girl asked. She sounded personally offended and all Marinette could do was nod. “Oh my. I bet she did it because you’re the front-runner.” Marinette had to remind herself to swallow before she choked.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“In the American version, the first impression rose is always one of the final four. In a lot of cases, that girl wins the whole thing. You’re the new front-runner. Everyone wants to be your friend so they can see what Adrien likes about you and imitate it.”

“So, you’re saying Lila won’t be the only one trying to get close to me?”

 “Well...” the girl draws out the vowel and bows her head to look at her feet.

“Well, what?”

“No one wants to be your friend now. Lila told everyone that if they tried to, she was going to destroy them and get them kicked off the show. If I leave, I want Adrien to be the one that makes the decision.” She gave a little shrug and smiled guiltily at Marinette.

“Lila is a liar, she has no control over who I’m friends with and she shouldn’t be allowed to intimidate the others.” Marinette gave an affirmative nod and continued to eat her breakfast/lunch.

“That’s such a relief to hear.” She paused and gave Marinette a beaming smile. “I’m Lucie, by the way.” Lucie extends a hand to Marinette who takes it and gives it a shake. “And to answer your original question, the girl who ran off is named Gabrielle and the girl who followed after her is Zoe. They come from the same town and are good friends.” She looked at her watch and sighed. “It was nice meeting you Marinette, and I’m glad I was able to set the record straight. Good luck today, but it’s my turn for my run around the mansion.” She stood up from the island, gave Marinette a little wave, and disappeared out of a door.

Marinette was so in shock from the conversation that she almost forgot to find Tikki something to eat. Thankfully, once she located the pantry, there was a large number of cookies hidden in there. Marinette grabbed a baggie and loaded up on some so Tikki could eat her fill and have something to recharge with tonight.

Once lunch was eaten and the cookies were delivered, Marinette wandered around the house. Her official excuse was that she wanted to get a better feel for it in case she needed to make a Ladybug escape, but in reality, she just wanted to find the other girls and avoid them. She wasn’t feeling up to anymore conversations like the one with Lucie, even if that one did turn out okay. Plus, she had never been in a house this large and it was interesting to see how it was laid out and decorated for the show. It was hard to move through the hallways with all of the luggage strewn around, so Marinette tried her best not to touch anything, in case someone wanted to use it against her.

Finally, she settled onto a bench with a window that overlooked the pool, where it seems most of the girls were showing off their new Gabriel swimsuits and working on their tans. It was unseasonably warm for late August, so Marinette couldn’t blame them for soaking in what was left of the summer. Each of the girls was showing off certain parts of their personalities and trying to intimidate the other girls. Lila seemed to be the only one succeeding, as she had been given a wide birth around her by most of the girls. Marinette also saw Hanna for the first time since the rose ceremony. She looked like one of the few who were actually enjoying themselves in the pool rather than baking in the sun.

Hanna’s innocence and general joy inspired Marinette and she opened up her sketchbook and started sketching out a dress. It was a shorter dress, more for daytime wear, and was designed to be light. Marinette wanted it to flow and be free, just like Hanna was. She was almost finished with the dress when someone cleared their throat behind her. Marinette jumped and had almost forgotten that she was in a house with 21 other girls. For a minute there, she felt like she was back in her room, in her own little designing bubble.

“I really hope that has been approved,” a voice said. Marinette looked up and recognized the girl from last night that wore the fencing outfit. Today she was wearing normal clothes, but her hair looked the exact same: cut into a short bob and left to sit there around her head. She sounded very serious and sharp, like she didn’t know how to carry on a conversation. “I’d hate to be the one to turn you in.”

Marinette highly doubted that. “You’re Kagami, right?” The girl gave a nod, which allowed her black hair to have some sort of movement. Marinette wondered if she ever did fun things with her hair, but she hardly seemed like the fun type. She felt pretty sure that if it would be socially acceptable, she would do away with her hair just for the practicality of it all. “I’m Marinette.”

“I know.”

That seemed to be the common answer. Marinette sighed and decided to skip the pleasantries. “The notebook has been approved. I’m not one to break the rules.” Unless Paris is in danger, but that’s a different problem entirely.

“Good to hear.” Kagami paused as she seemed to collect words for her next statement. “Why aren’t you outside enjoying the... weather?” Her voice tapered off at the end of the question and it forced Marinette to study her further. Why was this girl so odd?

“I wasn’t feeling the pool today. I’d much rather stay inside,” Marinette mumbled, looking back down at her sketchbook and doodling a cat paw in the corner, not wanting to reveal the real reason nor make eye contact with the weird girl.

“It wouldn’t have anything to do with your supposed ‘best friend’ Lila.” Welp. There goes that plan. Marinette looked up and saw that Kagami’s eyes were not harsh, but questioning.

“You don’t believe her?” Marinette asked, not daring to believe that someone else can see through Lila’s games.

“No.” Kagami said shortly. “She didn’t seem to be your friend yesterday and you weren’t even there to say anything. It seemed like some scheme she created.”

“Oh,” Marinette replied, releasing the tension in her shoulders that she didn’t realize she was holding. “Well thanks for not believing her lies.”

“Don’t thank me, I haven’t done anything.” Kagami replied curtly. She wasn’t warming up to Marinette at all; she felt just as distant and cold as she had the beginning of the conversation. Her words and tone made Marinette uneasy and she began to study her again. She just couldn’t get a feel for this girl. Seeming to not notice Marinette’s gaze, she continued. “I may not believe Lila, but there’s something off about you. You’re too calm for this competition. You’re hiding something and I’m determined to find out what it is.” At that, Kagami gave a curt nod and walked away.

Marinette blanched. Day two and she was already getting singled out by some girl claiming to be her best friend and threatening the others, and another girl claiming to be looking to out her secret. She was going to have to be more careful around the mansion than she thought. She couldn’t afford for the word to get around that Ladybug was participating in The Bachelor. Marinette, who was suddenly sick of sitting out in public and fearful of the other girls and their prying eyes, packed up her supplies and retreated to her room to hide. Maybe Tikki could cheer her up.

                    ----------------------------------------------------

Tikki wasn’t the one who did the cheering up, but once 8 o’clock hit, being out in the open as Ladybug did wonders to lift her spirits. She arrived at the meeting spot a couple of minutes early and became suddenly very nervous about seeing Adrien/Chat. Sneaking out was easy, but knowing what to say to Adrien was very nerve-racking.

Once all of the girls had eaten dinner, they all went to some secluded spot and didn’t talk to each other. This was the perfect cover for Marinette, who traveled to her room where her roommate wasn’t. She transformed then jumped off the balcony, leaving it unlocked to make it easier to get back inside, hopefully without Mathilde noticing (or deciding to lock the unlocked window).

She sensed him before she could see him and she had trouble keeping the smile off of her face. She was giddy, even though she technically had seen him less than 24 hours before. But after a day of being ignored by everyone and in turn ignoring them, she was excited for this interaction.

She heard his boots hit the rooftop and she turned to look at him. He gave her the sweetest smile and a “Hey.”

“Hey, yourself.”

“What a lovely evening it is,” he started. She couldn’t help but giggle at how awkward he sounded. She began to walk towards the edge of the rooftop to sit, knowing he’d follow.

“It sure is. Especially after being cooped up in the mansion all day.” He gave a slight gasp, that forced her to turn and look at him in mid-step. When she saw nothing wrong with him, she began searching around them, thinking there was an akuma. “What? Do you see something?”

“Um, no,” his voice was about an octave higher than it normally was. That made her giggle as she sat down on the edge of the roof. He cleared his throat before continuing. “So.... does that mean that you’re still in the competition?”

She watched him sit and couldn’t help but give him a smile. “Oh, you silly Kitty. Where you worried that you had let me go?” All he could do was nod. “Well, don’t worry. I’ve made it through the first round. If you cut me, you’d know that I was Ladybug right away, I promise.”

“Does that mean that I could just cut all of the girls, you’ll reveal yourself and we could live happily ever after?” The tone of his voice was clearly joking, but Ladybug’s heart skipped a beat at the thought. It would be a lot easier, if she could just reveal herself, they quit the show, get married, and live happily ever after. Sadly, she knew that wasn’t going to happen.

“You know your Father would never let you do that!” She may not have ever met Gabriel Agreste, but from all of the stories that Chat had told her throughout the years, it was obvious that he was a man who got his way, and if he didn’t then he found a way for it to happen. He sounded terrifying, and if Adrien was going to deviate from the show’s script at all, she knew he would pay for it dearly.

“Yeah, I know. But it’s still fun to think about,” he said softly. Ladybug’s heart sighed and she gave him a slight hug and leaned her head of his shoulder.

“Tell me about your day and I’ll tell you about mine.”

“Let’s see, I was woken up at the first sign of sunlight by my ever-annoying Kwami because he demanded cheese. Then a little bit later Mini-Natalie,” Ladybug took her head off of his shoulder to give him an incredulous look. “Oh sorry! That’s the girl in charge of me during the show. She moves me around and makes me keep to my schedule. She reminds me a lot of Father’s assistant, Natalie, and since I don’t know her name I call her Mini-Natalie.”

Ladybug gave a quick snort at his crazy line of thinking before leaning her head back down and saying, “Sounds legit. Continue.”

She could feel him chuckling beneath her, but he did continue. “Anyway, she took me to some dark room where they made me decide who was getting all of the dates this week. I also had to pick what I was going to do on each of these dates from the approved list for the first 2 weeks.” He gave a sad sigh that caused Ladybug to pull away to look at him again.

“How does that bother you? Would you rather plan all of the dates yourself? Cause honestly, it sounds exhausting.”

“It’s not that.” He paused and looked around the rooftop before saying, “It’s my Father. He’s... taken more of a hands-on approach to the whole process than I thought he was going to.”

Ladybug’s first thought was, “What does that mean?” but decided not to push him. Instead she asked, “How does that make you feel?”

“Annoyed. I—I thought that even though he was making me do this stupid show in the first place that I would at least get to pick who the winner was. I could go at it with an open mind and an open heart and actually get to know the girls and pick one that I could see being my wife. But now, I have to consider my dad’s preferences and how my decision could affect the company in the future.” He sighed again and then looked Ladybug straight in the eye. “I just want to make this choice myself, without anyone else’s opinions influencing my decision.”

“You deserve that much.”

Chat smiled and gave Ladybug another hug. This hug lasted a while and Ladybug never realized how comfortable and safe and at home she felt inside his arms. She could feel his head moving and she pulled back a little to see what he was doing. He rested his forehead on hers and whispered, “Thank you for supporting me. Knowing you were at the mansion yesterday made the whole day tolerable. I couldn’t have done it without you.”

She smiled and looked up at him. “You don’t know how much your presence changed everything for me too. Especially seeing all of those girls fawning over you. It helped me stay calm knowing that my Chaton was there looking for me.” He smiled at that and pulled away.

She missed his presence but knew it was time for them to start their rounds around the city. Slowly she stood, and offered him a hand to get up as well. “Well, duty calls, and we’ve been ignoring our city for the whole weekend.”

He took her hand and stood as well, though he held on to her hand a little bit longer. “Honestly, I’m surprised it didn’t randomly burst into flames or something while we were gone.”

At that, she laughed, a good hearty laugh. “Come on, Chaton. I’ll race you to the other side of the city.”

“You’re on.”

                    ----------------------------------------------------

When they had finished their rounds, Chat had decided to be the gentleman and walk Ladybug back to the mansion. It was a wonderful feeling, walking his lady home, but it was also odd knowing that inside her current house was 21 other girls he was dating too. He stopped her on a rooftop about a block away from the mansion. She turned to look at him with those gorgeous bluebell eyes and he knew that he had to do it.

“Ladybug, can I ask you something?” Instead of answering, she turned her body fully towards him so that he had her full attention. That was one of the things he loved about her, how she was always there to listen if he needed her. “I, um, need to ask a favor of you.”

She tilted her a little to the side and she looked at him quizzically. He gulped and looked down at his hands, which were twisting nervously. He kept feeling as though he was under a microscope before remembering that there were no cameras around now. It was just him and his lady. Just the way he liked it.

“That depends on what it is, but I’ll try my best.” At that he smiled and looked back up at her. He hardened his resolve and just went for it. He leaned in and put his lips on hers and hoped she wouldn’t freak out.

Freak out is exactly what she did. She jerkily leaned back and made a noise that sounded almost like a choked scream. “What was that for?” she demanded, her tone a lot harsher than he thought it would have been.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know what to do! I’ve never kissed anyone before and I just wanted to take a chance and—” before he could continue, she cut him off.

“You’ve never kissed anyone before?”

He ducked his head, feeling the blush stain his cheeks. “No, not that I remember,” he mumbled. Him and Ladybug have kissed on two other occasions. Once during an akuma that Chat didn’t find out about until months later, and another right after they had their memories wiped, but before Ladybug’s cure was done. That one had been photographed, so he had proof, but he didn’t count those since he couldn’t remember them happening.

“Oh, that’s right,” Ladybug replied knowingly (and with a slight blush, Chat noticed). Her eyes lit up with a new-found fire though as she asked, “Wait, not even as Adrien?”

All Chat could do was shake his head.

At that, she let out a short laugh, “You, Adrien Agreste, have never kissed someone before?”

“Oh my gosh, do you have to tell the whole city?!”

“I’m speaking at a normal voice level,” She pointed out flatly.

“But it feels like you’re yelling.” He crossed his arms and gave her a pout. Normally she would laugh at his childish stance and then they could move on, but he wasn’t as lucky this time.

“So why did you decide to jump me with this kiss?” It was her turn to cross her arms and the sight made Chat feel more like cowering away than laughing.

He decided the truth was less embarrassing than what just happened. “The producers told me that I have to kiss someone this first week. Normally, the Bachelor kisses a good handful of the girls on the first night, but I was too embarrassed by the fact that I had never done that to do so. I want my first kiss to be memorable and with someone that I’m comfortable around, so I thought you would be the best choice.” He let his voice trail off, giving her the chance to respond. He was mentally kicking himself and he hoped that she would at least forgive him and they could forget this ever happened.

Instead, she walked up to him and placed her hands on his cheeks, pulling his eyes to hers. She began rubbing his temple. “Wha—What are you doing?” Her proximity and touch hadn’t bothered him earlier, but it stirred something in him this time that made him want to lean down and kiss her again.

“I’m erasing that memory. If this is going to be your first kiss it needs to be a proper one.” Before he could reply, her lips were on his and he forgot whatever he was going to say. He had imagined what it would be like to kiss Ladybug a million times, but none of those had prepared him for this. Her lips were soft, sweet, and tasted like strawberry lip gloss. He felt her melt into him and he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him.

Too soon, way too soon she was pulling away. She looked up at him and gave him a shy smile. “I really need to get back before they discover I’m gone.” He felt his head nod, but was still too much in shock to respond with words. “Thanks for letting me be your first kiss. I’ll see you later.” And with that she ran to the edge of the building and yo-yoed her way towards the mansion.

He managed to get himself headed back towards the hotel he was staying in before a yell of excitement escaped his lips. He felt like running and dancing and celebrating and screaming it from the rooftops and yet keeping the whole beautiful moment to himself. He was overwhelmed and excited and he knew that he was going to marry her. He just had to figure out which one she is.

He went to sleep that night with a smile on his face and even Plagg’s complaints about staying out too late couldn’t ruin his newfound happiness.

~

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Evil Karma - Chapter 10

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9

Word Count: 1,922

Summary: Sofi’s feeling a bit angry, but that anger turns to fun when she realizes the Isle has a special visitor

Pairings: OC x platonic!Gil, mention of Ben x Mal, mention of Jay x Carlos

Rating: T 

Warnings: swear words, violence, murder, blood but not gory, choking kinda?

Tags: @descendantofthesparrow @hookedradge @newtshairdryer @curse-brekker @amityravenclawelf AND @batmanwearsabowtie bc they’ve been such an active/amazing follower and I love them with all my heart.

The Isle is usually quieter when night falls. The day had gone by incredibly quickly and it was quite busy to say the least. I looked down at my bronze timepiece. Good, I still had about 15 minutes to get back to the Chip Shoppe before Harry would overworry and send Gil and the crew to get me. It’s not something that I entirely believed he would live up to, especially considering that he’d have to ask Uma first. Still, there was that slim chance that she would permit it. I didn’t think I would have to tell them, but I’m not some kind of princess that needs to be looked after constantly. Was there a chance that my episode in Uma’s room had changed their opinion on that?

I don’t need protection anymore! I had to teach myself nearly everything I knew after realizing that my demonic excuse for a dad wasn’t going to teach me shit. I know a dagger so well that one swift flick of my wrist could slice even the toughest skin as easily as a letter opener would tear a piece of paper! I can fire an arrow from the highest point of the Isle and still hit my target square in the eye! I’ve got the venom of a cobra and the tongue of a rattlesnake luring its prey! The little girl who got scars and bruises and tossed around like a worm on a hook died when she slipped that bottle of thick, black Dreamshade poison into her father’s wine. I will do absolutely anything to prove that.

A smile tugged at the corner of my lips when I saw Gil at a pickled egg stand in the marketplace. The bone-thin, wrinkled lady running said stand was giving him quite some trouble. “Get this through your thick skull, kid! These eggs ain’t free!” The voice was nasally, overly crisp, and far too forward for the woman to be anybody other than - 

“Yzma, Uma said that I get these for free!” Gil continued slipping the thick yolks into the basket. This was exactly the opportunity I needed. I quickly rushed to Gil’s side and place my hand on his shoulder, leaning onto him.

“Hey Gil, is everything okay? I see you’re out for pickled eggs again.” He looks at me with the eyes of a confused puppy. Gil and I hadn’t spent a lot of time together outside of shifts at the Chip Shoppe, but he was someone I wanted to protect. His loyalty towards Harry and Uma is as indestructible as a diamond and as never ending as the open sea. He showed this ray of sunshine type of kindness but Harry and Uma know there’s a sliver of evil somewhere. Maybe I know it’s there too, but I’ve yet to see it. So, for now, I want to protect him.

“Uma said I get these eggs for free!” He looked over to Yzma, a soft yet angry expression forming on his face. “This empress won’t let me take them!” I looked to him, exaggerated shock and hurt in my eyes. Then, I turned my attention to the wrinkled witch in front of us.

“You can go and tell that pirate rat that her words don’t mean shit to me! You pay for the eggs or I throw you to the fish! You hear that, kid?” I wrap my fingers around the handle of my dagger, getting ready for a quick fight. Fire bubbled in my chest and I could feel my smile widening with a sense of madness. Since arriving on the Isle, I tried my best to keep a calm composure. But in cases like this, how else is one supposed to show that they’re not to be messed with?

“Oh, she’s not gonna like the sound of that. Come on, empress, you should know more than anybody how annoying it is when one doesn’t listen to the woman in charge..right?” Yzma gave me a scowl that was semi-threatening at the most.

“I’ve seen you riding around here. You think that just because you’re on the pirates’ good side that people will forget how much of an outsider you are? I’ll break you the news, girl. You can parade around with two buff pirates at your hip and a fancy dagger in your pocket...but it ain’t gonna bring those kids back from the dead.” Before she could let out another word, I remove my dagger from my left pocket and slash her left arm. A crimson trail starts leaking down the small, skinny limb as she goes to grab the arm in pain. I press the dagger against her throat, pushing up her head so I can see the fear and pain starting to taint her eyes.

With a maniacal laugh, I leaned in close and lower my voice. “Oh PLEASE say that again. I haven’t spilled some blood in quite a bit.” I look behind me to see Gil in a way that I hadn’t seen often. His eyes were slightly widened, possibly in shock of what I was about to do. There was a playful smile tugging at the corner of his lips. Not a teasing kind of playful like Harry’s, but like the playful smile of a kid who had found their way into the cookie jar. “You’ll get your eggs, Gil, don’t worry. We just may have to throw a body in the ocean afterwards.”

With the fear in her eyes growing stronger and more blood spilling out of her bony arm, Yzma makes an attempt at a soft smile. “You know what? Maybe giving free eggs to a regular customer isn’t such a bad idea after all...at least somebody would be eating them, right?” Fear shook her voice until it was a quivering mess. The old skeleton of a woman tried everything she could to hide it. It was a valid attempt, I’ll give it that.

“You see, Yzma? Was that so hard?” 

“I did what you asked, girl. Now let go of me!”

I tsked in disappointment and began to tighten my grip on the dagger. I pushed the blade closer to her throat, hearing her breath hitch as she began to lose control. I wasn’t going to let anybody condescend me. Nobody will ever be allowed to make me feel like a street rat ever again! I will make sure of it. “I would...but you pissed me off, empress. Not only did you insult my Captain, but you disrespected my boys. Nobody does that and survives the night. So...Yzma..any last words?” She attempts to speak, her voice coming out much in a much raspier tone than usual. “Oh, that’s right. You can’t talk. Oh well.” With a quick swing of my arm, her skin is broken and blood begins to spray from her throat. Her weak body immediately falls to the ground as she attempts to save herself. But the attempt is futile, and after a minute or so of meaningless flailing, her body goes limp. I look up to Gil with an innocent smile and gently place my hand on his shoulder. “There you go, Gil. She won’t be bothering you anymore. Now come on, let’s go home. I’m sure Harry and Uma are expecting both of us.”

As Gil and I began walking, I feel a harsh bump against my right shoulder. Out of instinct, I pick up my dagger once again and pin it to the man’s throat. Almost immediately, I realize who he is. His hair was light and long enough to nearly cover his light brown eyes. He carried the aura of weakness, of pity and mercy. The thought of it made me sick. “Well, look who we have here. Another street runt that doesn’t know how to watch where they walk.” It’d be perfect to play dumb. Nobody on Auradon had seen my face before. The four VKs who attacked Neverland were gone by the time I made the portal to escape. None of them knew who I was, so it’d be perfect logic to pretend I didn’t know them. But I knew, and I knew well.

“Hey man, hey! H...hey, hey I know you!” I look over to Gil, a grin tugging at the corner of my lip. We had found the King, and if we could find a way to distract the entourage behind him, we could snatch him up. 

“Uh, no...don’t know you either, man.” Ben replied, choking out his words through the firm grip my dagger had on his skin. The three around him were nervous, but they did a lot better at keeping a calm composure. It was easy to tell that they used to have a life here.

“Uh, yeah you do. Come on man, really? Dude, I’ll give you a hint. My dad is quick...slick...and his neck...huhhh..is incredibly thick.” Gil points to his neck as if to give some kind of demonstration. I keep the dagger hilted but look over my shoulder to speak to him.

“Gil. Really?”

“Why doesn’t he know me? Everybody knows me…” Gil asks, a little twinge of both confusion and sadness in his tone. 

“Gil, of course he knows you. He’s lying to you to save his ass. You know him too..right?” Gil took a longer look at Ben, racking his brain to come up with a name, but there was nothing. “Gil. Come on, use your brain.”

“My dad said I don’t have one of those.”

I rolled my eyes and pointed to a nearby poster of Ben and Mal, which had been tagged with our crews’ own ‘we ride with the tide’ tagline. “Then at least use your eyes!” Gil pointed back in forth between the poster and Ben. The entourage surrounding Ben followed Gil’s gaze as he looked back and forth. 

Finally, his eyes widened in recognition and with a gasp, Gil spoke up. “Oh! You’re King Ben!” The four of them immediately tried to reject the claim, but it was far too late. “Yeah, no..you’re totally King Ben! And J-Jay, Carlos, Evie, hey guys!” The three of them stood there awkwardly, not knowing what to do. 

“King Ben, huh? I had a run in with your girlfriend earlier..or should I ex-girlfriend? A bit of trouble in paradise?”

“Mal and I aren’t broken up.”

“Why else would she come to the Isle, huh? She’s not welcome here anymore, and there is no way that Uma would give her back her old territory.” I lowered my dagger. King Ben would be an essential tool in my plan with Uma, just not yet. Not when he has an army around him ready to fight. I looked up at Ben and slowly brought my finger to his neck, wiping off the blood that my dagger painted onto him. “Well then, welcome to the Isle, your majesty. Enjoy your stay.” I mockingly bowed and extended an arm away from the stand. The blue haired girl, who I now knew as Evie, grabbed him by the back of his shoulders and lead him away. Jay and Carlos soon followed, their hands interlocked to as a way of affectionate protection. I looked over to Gil as they left, he soon smiled and jumped up and down in excitement.

“Oooh! Uma’s gonna love this!” He taps me on the shoulder and turns toward the direction of the Chip Shoppe. “Last one to the Chip Shoppe is a bucket of shrimp!” He shouts giddily, and I run alongside him back home.

[purplesurveys]

630

SEVEN DEADLY SINS

Sin 1: Lust 1. Who was the last person you checked out? Did they check you out too? Surprise surprise, it’s my girlfriend. Yeah she did - I think I’d start worrying if she didn’t, lmao.

2. Who was the last person you desired, but they didn’t feel the same? Gab, at one point. Other than her, I haven’t desired anybody else; but I was on the ‘didn’t feel the same’ side at least once, back when Mike used to like me.

3. Ever cheated on a significant other? If so, have you learned from it? No, I’ve never cheated.

4. Do you watch porn? Yes. I’d have phases where I’d view it 2-3 times a week, then I’d completely stop for months – kinda like how everyone plays The Sims lol. I don’t know why it works like that for me.

5. Do you masturbate? Sometimes.

6. Best physical features on your preferred sex? I don’t have a preferred sex, and my favored features differ per person.

7. Who are some celebrities that you think are totally hot? Kristen Stewart, if you don’t me already haha. Also Eugene Lee Yang from the Try Guys, Beyoncé, and Jennifer Aniston.

8. Did you ever lust after a best friend’s significant other? How did it turn out? Mmm nope, I never found myself attracted to Hans in any way. The fact that he has always been associated with Angela ever since high school also helps.

9. When was the last time you had sex? Like a week before Christmas, I think.

10. Ever pursued someone, even though they were taken? No, that’s a little awful.

Sin 2: Gluttony 1. When did you last eat at a restaurant? What restaurant was it? Last Monday – Gab and I went to Yabu to catch dinner. We had been entertaining my mom’s guests and their kid all day and thought we couldn’t leave the house cos it’s a bit impolite, but I had such a craving that I ended up asking permission if we can go to Yabu by 8:30 even though the mall closed by 9 lol. I realize I talk about Yabu an awful lot on here so for those who wanna know, it’s this local Japanese place that serves theeeee best katsu.

2. When did you last have fast food? Where did you get it? I don’t actually remember. If I’m not wrong, it was around two or three weeks ago, and we had KFC delivered to our house because we were too lazy to cook or go out. I had the Zinger Steak, which I hope they never phase out because it’s insanely good.

3. What was the biggest meal you had all day? I haven’t eaten yet, and it’s only 10:51 AM. 

4. Do you have too many clothes? How often do you go shopping? I wouldn’t say it’s overwhelmingly many, but I definitely own more clothes than the pieces I’d usually wear, and that’s because I don’t like throwing old stuff out just in case I’d need them in the future (definitely got my great-grandma’s hoarding tendencies). I go shopping once in a few months, which in itself is pretty seldom, but that’s because when I go shopping I usually already buy a shit-ton of new clothes, enough for me to be able to mix and match to come up with new outfits for the next few weeks.

5. What’s something you have a LOT of? Black clothing. I’ve made an effort to get more colored tops, but the blacks still overpower.

6. Do you eat a lot? I’m very takaw-tingin, which is a Filipino term used when you get a crapload of food either because you’re hungry or because you’re confident you can finish it – or both – then you never do. Takaw means greedy or glutton, tingin roughly means sight, so it literally means that you just kinda want to get everything because it looks like a lot. So to answer the question, I always feel like I can eat a lot, but at the end of the day I just end up with stomachaches and I never learn.

7. What was the last thing you splurged (spent a lot of money) on? If a bunch of stuff counts, then I splurged on Christmas presents for various people that I all bought in one go – I got massage oils, a garlic press, a frisbee, Marikina sandals, lipstick, and Instax film. If you’re talking about a single thing that I had to drop a ton of money on, it was for my dog’s blood test and some arthritis meds that the vet recommended.

8. What do you spend most of your money on (besides bills and anything necessary like that)? I only ever spend on necessities like gas, clothes, and food, honestly. Other than that... I spend on (and this is very seldom) whatever hobby I’m into at the moment. At one point I spent on slime because I got interested in them, and before that – and y’all know about this – I spent my Christmas savings on adult coloring books and pencils.

9. Last time you ate candy? What was it? A week or two ago; I had a Crunch bar.

10. Last thing you ate too much of? Eggs, I think. My mom makes it for breakfast so I have it almost every day.

Sin 3: Greed 1. Do you share things? How often? Yeah I can be pretty generous with my stuff. I know I’d appreciate it when other people lend me their belongings, so I try to do the same. I once lent my phone to Rita for over an hour just because she wanted to play Mario Kart, and I also lent a book that’s really important to me to an online friend I barely knew; it was with him for like two years, lol.

2. Someone asks you for a piece of your cookie. You break it in half, but the pieces aren’t equal. Who gets the bigger piece? Usually it would be me; but if the person who asked for it was Gab, or if that particular person likes the cookie I have, then they get the bigger piece.

3. When you see change on the ground, do you pick it up? Only if it’s a 10-peso coin, because I’m greedily picky like that lmao. Other people might need a peso or a 5-peso coin more, so I leave it be.

4. How often do you lend money to people? I don’t, and that’s one thing I wouldn’t tend to lend. My parents just give me allowance and it’s usually enough for necessities and for treating myself once or twice a week, so I wouldn’t be able to have some left for others. Besides, that’s my parents’ money and it would be pretty fuckin’ unfair to them if I just give it away to others lmao.

5. Do you loooove money? I hate what it’s done to society, how it’s divided the rich and the poor, and how the people with the most money also tend to be the most selfish coughcoughBILLIONAIREScoughcough. But I love spending for my own, hah.

6. If someone offers to pay for you, do you decline or readily accept? Oh no no no. Decline all the way. If they keep insisting then I’ll probably give in because it’s the polite thing to do, but if I can, I’ll keep declining.

7. Which of your friends is the wealthiest? Rita. Her grandpa is a former senator and she lives in literally the swankiest neighborhood in Metro Manila; I was a bit intimidated when she invited us to her place for the first time lol. She’s the simplest person I know, too; and that’s my favorite kind of rich.

8. Would you take a high-paying job that you didn’t really like just for the money and benefits? That’s definitely what I plan to do, lmao. At least this is how I know myself now: I have enough money to buy whatever I want, and I’m a happy camper. That may change in a few months or within the next year and I may eventually wanna search for a passion – but for now, it’s the mindset I’m going with when I go job-hunting soon. If I survived four years of college with a very burnt-out, emptied passion for journalism that I thought I had, I could probs do the same in the workplace.

9. Ever stole from anyone? What about stole from a store? What happened? I unknowingly stole a box of crayons from a store back when security equipment wasn’t that rigid yet lmao. I realized I ‘stole’ it because I had it in my hands and not in a paper bag when I walked out, so I immediately went back to pay for it. I’ve never stolen anything from anyone.

10. Do you ever have enough money? I don’t think anyone ever feels this way. Ever heard of billionaires?

Sin 4: Sloth 1. Last thing you procrastinated on? Washing the dishes last night.

2. When you’re at a strip mall and the next store you want to go to is at the other side, do you drive over there instead of take a short walk? It depends how far “the other side” is. <-- Yep pretty much. If it’s literally on the other side of a street, then obviously I’d go walk. But in places like my school which is super big and where ‘other side’ could mean 2 km away, a drive would be more convenient.

3. What’s a typical day off of school and/or work like for you? I’d normally spend the day lazing around on the couch with my dog beside me and lurking around social media.

4. What’s one talent you have that you don’t really work on, even though you have the ability to be good at it? Public speaking, or debating.

5. How many hours of television do you watch a day? I keep Friends as a background noise on Netflix nearly all day because I hate when it gets too quiet around me. As for watching on an actual television, I haven’t used one in years.

6. What about the amount of time you spend on the internet a day? The internet takes up my entire day it’s crazy lol. I kinda need it for everything now.

7. How many hours of sleep do you get a day? Do you sleep in late? It’s always different. I can go anywhere between 3 and 10 hours of sleep. I don’t sleep in often, though.

8. Do you drive to places that are less than three blocks away? I don’t know how big blocks are supposed to be since we don’t use that system here. But yes, I usually drive even though Point A to Point B is very much walkable hahaha. My friends make fun of me a lot for it but I don’t care, at least I don’t get to my destination all sweaty and smelling like the sun.

9. When was the last time you exercised? November, on my last PE class.

10. Ever copied and pasted your homework from a website on the internet? I never did this. My schools always emphasized the consequences of plagiarism so as someone who always stuck by the rules, I always made sure I at least paraphrased the content I see on the internet.

Sin 5: Wrath 1. If you could kill one person and get away with it, would you do it? I know it’s pretty dark to come from such a place, but I’ve always thought death is an easy way out for people who’ve done awful things. I could answer this question with a name of a corrupt politician, rapists, or animal abusers, but tbh they don’t deserve the sweet escape of death, even if it were from murder.

2. Is there anyone you honestly and truly can say that you hate? Anybody who has hurt cats and dogs.

3. Is there anyone you want revenge on, whether you want to get them back big-time or just play a little prank on them for hurting your feelings? Like I said, I’d daydream about getting revenge just to satiate my desire for it, but I think it’s pretty childish and downright cartoonish to actually go through with it. I’ve only ever seen people getting petty revenge in movies, but it seems a bit stupid in real life.

4. Are you fighting with any friends right now? Why? No. The most that’s happened was me kinda scolding Andrew for not letting me know beforehand that he submitted our thesis proposal to our prof through VIBER, which is incredibly unprofessional and I definitely let him know what I thought about it. I didn’t fight with him though.

5. Last time you were really angry? What happened? The aforementioned thesis prof letting me know we’re missing a part of our thesis on the last day for profs to submit their grades. That meant that however early we submitted a revision, she wouldn’t have been able to give it a mark anyway. That definitely pissed me off, especially considering that she was silent for two weeks and didn’t give back any comments which made us think we were good to go.

6. When you’re angry, what do you do to calm yourself down? I watch Friends or any one of my favorite YouTubers so I can have some relief. Other times, I’d force myself to sleep.

7. “Hate is just the fear of loving someone.” true or false? No. That makes no sense to me.

8. What’s the best revenge you ever got on someone? Never done this before.

9. Was there any hard feelings after your last break-up? On whose end was it on? There were definitely hard feelings in the beginning because she executed the breakup so poorly and I thought I didn’t deserve any of the treatment I was getting, and I was also mad that I wasted my time for that long only for her to break up with me in the end.

10. Ever been cheated on? How did that make you feel? No.

Sin 6: Envy 1. Is there anyone you’re jealous of? Name a person and tell us why. Envious is the better word, and I feel this way towards anybody who live with both parents. My dad’s worked overseas all my life, and as grateful as I am for his sacrifices, having a dad at home is more foreign sensation to me than the idea of having a dad who’s gone for 4-6 months a year.

2. List three physical features some other people have that you’re envious of (no need to get specific and name people; you can just say something like “brown eyes” or “having perfect eyebrows”). Straight teeth, fixed eyebrows, legs that don’t need much shaving.

3. List three personality features that other people have that you’re envious of. Confidence, independence... is privilege a personality trait lol?

4. Are you a jealous significant other? I can be. I don’t make a big deal about being jealous as much as I did two or three years ago anymore though.

5. Could you date someone who was really jealous? Gab can be a little jealous but for the most part it’s endearing because it’s never turned into abuse.

6. What celebrity’s looks do you envy the most? Audrey Hepburn.

7. Do you think anyone is envious of you? In your opinion, what characteristics (physical and mental) do you possess that you think someone might be envious of? Being in a long-term relationship, definitely. A lot of people my age want significant others so bad, and I know this because a good chunk of them post the same wish over and over on social media lol.

8. What are a few things you wish you were good at? Drawing, playing an instrument, dancing ballet, changing a car tire, COOKING.

9. Did you ever date someone, break up, and then see them dating someone very attractive a few days later? Were you jealous of that person? This has never happened to me.

10. When looking at a love interest’s exes, do you often find yourself jealous of their good-looking exes? I haven’t had to do this, because I was Gab’s first. I wouldn’t want to fixate on exes if I were in a different situation, though.

Sin 7: Pride 1. What’s something you brag about a lot (be honest–we all brag sometimes)? My school is easy bragging rights. Everybody wants to be in UP.

2. What physical features do you take the most pride in? My body figure in general. Also my fingers, legs, and jawline.

3. Are you satisfied with what you have? Yeah but as the above questions have made it clear, I can always use more money lol.

4. Be honest… when someone is telling you something, do you often change the subject so it’s about you and your accomplishments instead? NEVER. That’s one of the worst things anyone can do. I feel like I used to do this when I was younger, then it just hit me one day about how tasteless it can be so ever since then I’ve let other people hype themselves up and be excited about accomplishments or new things in their life as much as they want with me, as long as they aren’t being so conceited.

5. Do you like talking about your achievements? If I’m in a group and we started sharing our achievements then yeah I’d join in. But I wouldn’t bring it up if it wasn’t already being brought up. It’s better to let the accomplishments speak for themselves.

6. Do your parents tend to brag about how well you came out? My mom is definitely more ~braggier than my dad, but she’s never come off as an asshole about it. If she was, I’d pull her aside.

7. Do you strive to be better than others? Do you think competing with others is healthy? I keep a mindset of competing with others, but I keep it internal.

8. What do you do better than most people? See the little details. I’m always surprised at how most of the people I work with just look at the big picture – like how they don’t pay attention to the red squiggle under misspelled words on a group paper (or if they do see it, they don’t do anything about it), or how they don’t seem to care about proper spacing on a Powerpoint and proceed to just dump a bunch of text on one slide. Now this is something I can brag about too, cos a lot of people are just so not detail-oriented lol.

9. Do you believe in taking pride in things you can’t control (ex. being proud of your heritage, being proud of your skin color, being proud of your natural artistic ability)? I don’t see why that’s an issue.

10. Who are you competing with right now (it could be anything–classmates for a grade, co-workers for a position, other girl for a guy, etc.)? There’s no particular person, but like I said, I’m always in this perpetual mindset of wanting to compete with others just so I’m more motivated to perform well and get things done.

[nottooldforthisship]

*CHEF fics*

- Learning to Eat by @mbpgku : Celebrity chef Louis Tomlinson has a problem. He’s opening his first restaurant in 9 weeks, and he has yet to hire a pastry chef- apparently people think he’s ‘standoffish’ and ‘rude’ and ‘quick to temper’. Whatever. He ends up saddled with an annoying, happy-go lucky rookie who also happens to be obnoxiously good looking. His tv presenter and pop star best friends only add to the drama, and for fucks sake would everyone please stop quoting Julia Child?! Kitchen AU where Harry helps Louis re-learn how to eat.  (METAPHORICALLY) (38k, M)

- Every Good Boy Deserves Cookies , by @stunning-stylinson​ : “Y-yeah?” Louis asks breathlessly, “And then?“Harry giggles and moves his bum back to meet Louis. “Add the vanilla and crack the eggs, beating it all in with salt,” Harry says.Or where Harry is a chef who teaches a class and Louis swears it’s only Harry’s bossiness that turns him on, not the recipe for cookies and Harry likes being praised. (8.5k, E)

- Feels Like Coming Home , by @phd-mama: The last thing Harry Styles expects when he’s hanging out at the Someday Cafe in Somerville one rainy October day is for his ex, Louis Tomlinson to walk through the door, but that’s exactly what happens. After a spectacularly ugly break-up three years prior, Harry hasn’t heard one word from Louis, and he’s moved on. Gotten over him. But having Louis back in his life, not to mention working at the restaurant where he’s a chef, isn’t easy, and the feelings that Harry thought he’d left turn out to be not so easily forgotten. This is a story about love and the power of forgiveness, and how the hard choices we make define us, and change our lives. (60k, E)

- Before We Evaporate ,  by  crimsontheory  : Louis Tomlinson; executive chef and owner of his own five star restaurant, been voted one of the top chefs in London, and has won several awards for his work in the kitchen. He’s always dreamed of being on Chopped, but never believed it would actually happen. Until it does. Now that he’s officially made it onto the show, there’s one tall, curly haired distraction that might just ruin everything for him.Or the kinda sorta enemies to lovers Chopped AU with far more smut than necessary. (37k, E)  

- Fool's Gold , by @freetheankles : Or the Arnacoeur AU in which Harry is scheduled to be married to Liam in 10 days and Harry’s mother hires Louis and his team to break them up. (55k, E)

- Check Please      by  zedi   :      Louis has a shit date. Harry offers to cover the bill. They maybe fall in love. (2k, NR)

*BAKER fics*

- Relief next to me , by @haydolce : AU. What happens when a baker and a graphic designer meet via a very specific Craigslist post? Fate, friendship, food, and maybe more. (333k, E)

- leave it to the breeze , by @hattalove :  or a great british bake off au in which louis cares about winning and winning only, harry is made of sunshine and rainbow sprinkles, and niall sticks his nose into other people’s business. also featuring liam as louis’s best friend-slash-concerned mother, and zayn as a macaron connoisseur. (81k, E)

- shine by @lourrynavy​ ; Louis is an actor who needs to get away from the real world. He does the only thing that he can and runs away, finding himself in a small town where he happens upon Harry. What Louis doesn’t expect is to somehow fall in love and end up having to face what he was running from all along. (40k, M)

- Tis the Season for…Love?   ,    by @afangirlfantasy:   Prompt: Harry seems to have it all: A successful career as a pastry chef, a Victorian home in London, and a dedicated boyfriend who he's been with for years.   One day he stops by his boyfriend's apartment to surprise him and finds out that he's not so dedicated to Harry after all. Shocked and too depressed to celebrate, he decides to skip Christmas and on a whim leaves on a plane to New York. In New York he meets Louis… Or...Louis might just be what Harry's needed all along. (27k, M)

-  Flour and Chocolate      by   teaandtumblr : Then he approached the display cabinet. And the foreboding slammed into him. Because every product had letters next to it. Letters. GF, DF, V, O, VGN. What. The. Fuck? Lifting his eyes to the chalkboard menu spread across the back wall Louis felt physically ill. ‘Gluten-free’, ‘organic’, ‘vegan’, ‘paleo’, ‘dair-…’ Wait, what the fuck was a paleo? He had entered some hipster-trash establishment and it was more than time to get out.  OR Louis is a single dad and Harry works at the newly opened bakery down the street.(145k, M)

- Float Down Like Autumn Leaves (Stay Now) , by @getmesometacos  : The AU in which Louis has a 6 year old daughter with a costume emergency that puts her school’s annual Halloween party at risk, Halloween decorated cupcakes are hard to find and tall men look absolutely ridiculously cute in giant vegetables costumes. Co-starring Harry, who makes really good food for the kids. Featuring Niall, who works in a bakery but has a part time job as a babysitter. And as much as he doesn’t believe in love at first (or second) sight, Louis is really infatuated and really wouldn’t mind seeing Harry again.(16k, M)

- we’re still going, eight in the morning , by @nooelgallagher​  and @yoursongonmyheart​ : Harry washes his hands quickly before grabbing his phone. His screen lights up to 3 notifications.DJTommo is now following you!@DJTommo mentioned you in a tweet!Direct Message from @DJTommo!Harry yelps, throwing his phone to Niall who just barely catches it.Niall looks down at the phone, seeing first the tweet, then the DM. He tosses the phone back to Harry, who nearly drops it. “What are ya doing, mate! Answer him!”Harry thinks for a moment about what he wants to say. This is his chance to actually talk to Louis Tomlinson. Louis Tomlinson messaged him directly. He can say anything he wants. He begins typing, his fingers shaky.Niall comes over to stand next to Harry and peers down, looking to see what he wrote. When he does, he lets out a groan….Or, the one where Harry owns a bakery, Louis is a radio DJ, and Niall and Liam roll their eyes at their incessant flirting. (31k, E)

- taste on my tongue , by @bethaboolou : Louis Tomlinson, second place winner on TXF four years ago, is looking to reinvent his career. Harry Styles is a baker who is desperate for a bakery of his own.Louis doesn’t bake. Or cook. Or know how to use an oven.Take Louis. Take Harry. Add in a heaping cup of sexual tension. Another cup of delicious (and not so delicious) food. A smidgen of competitive spirit. A dash of hopes and dreams. And you get Kitchen Wars, a TV show that promises to be the must-watch event of the fall. (77k, E)

- come away with me , by @suspendrs: Or, Louis has to pick up the pieces of his and his daughter’s life after his wife dies, and Harry is a beautiful stranger that just wants to help. (80k, NR)

- Whether Clouds or Clear Skies , by @onewasturning :   “You, young Harold, are a baker among curry houses and vintage clothing stores,” Louis says, and it forces a bark of surprised laughter out of Harry.  “I’m a— sorry, what?”  “Harry,” Louis says, “last night I had an experience bordering on profound.”  “You’re making it sound like you did something sexual with my muffin,” Harry says. Or, Louis gets into the habit of stealing baked goods while Harry’s busy keeping tabs on the weather. (25k, E)

- Every Story Ever Told , by @all-these-larrythings : Becoming a best-selling author isn’t as difficult as Louis would have guessed. It seems all you need these days is the perfect blend of alcohol induced philosophy, complete disregard for one’s dignity, a live blog about how fucked love is, and a bored publisher interested enough to offer him a deal. (54k, NR)

- Skin New, Hands True, My Hands All Over You , by PearlyDewdrops   : Harry designs wedding cakes, so of course meeting blissfully happy couples every day is part of his job description. Unfortunately, it’s caused Harry to perpetually hope each new day is the one he’ll find love, too. That is, until Harry realises everything he’s ever wanted is right under his nose in the shape of his best friend, Louis. But predictably, Harry only comes to this epiphany when Louis starts seeing someone else. And this is not a John Hughes movie as far as Harry is aware. Everyone else is pretty sure, though. Featuring a heavy dose of pining, copious amounts of alcohol, drunk dialing that results in a situation reminiscent of Rachel Green’s, a ginger cat that likes to interrupt intimate moments, and a Halloween party that changes everything. (44k, E)

* RESTAURANT OWNER fics*

- all the lights are full of colour, by @infinitelymint : So, fast-forwarding eight years from the day Harry met Louis, he is now a twenty-seven year old owner of one of the most up-and-coming eating establishments on the London restaurant scene, father of two wonderful boys and… separated from his husband. Now, that last part definitely was never a part of the original plan.  Or, Harry and Louis are separated, but for the sake of their two sons, they choose to spend Christmas together. It may just lead to a Christmas miracle. (26k, E)

- You'll Hear Me Calling for You , by  pinky_heaven19  : OR the one where Harry is an Alpha and Louis has a problem with it - until he doesn't. (42k, E)

- Let's Go Get Away , by @letsjustsee : Or, a fluffy AU in which Louis owns a restaurant that's next door to Harry's shop, and Louis is completely unaware how smitten he really is. (7k, NR)

* FOOD BLOGGING fics*

- 'Til I Tasted You  , by @icanhazzalou : Louis is Harry Styles' biggest fan. It doesn't matter that Harry is famous for being a food blogger and Louis can't cook to save his life.At least, until Harry offers to give Louis a cooking lesson. Then it matters just a teensy bit. (14k, E)

[ja9doeswhole30]

Before-Whole30 Baseline

One of the reasons I kept putting off committing to a firm eating plan like Whole30 is that I consider myself a pretty healthy eater. I’ve always anticipated that forcing myself to be 100% compliant with a strict plan would send me into a deprivation mentality, and that being a ~90% whole-food eater with a little wiggle room for other stuff wasn’t the worst thing in the world. 

Nonetheless, here we are. I’ve bought into the idea of a 30-day reset of eating only the “right” foods. As my start date approaches, I wanted to focus on the ways in which I’ve been eating well and can build on during Whole30. 

I cook at home. A lot. Ever since I can remember, I’ve loved to cook. Eating is awesome, so why wouldn’t someone want to participate in the creation of the food and make it exactly to spec?! My early attempts as a teen mostly consisted of eggs, pancakes, certain traditional Jewish holiday foods, and cookies. I also messed around with salads, sandwiches, smoothies, etc. (more “food assemblage” than actual “cooking,” if we’re being technical). Then during college I graduated to vegetable stir-fries and sauteed pasta dishes, and I made a lot of marinated chicken breast on my Foreman grill. When the hubs and I moved in together we started incorporated baked salmon once a week along with the grilled chicken, turkey sausage, and turkey meatloaf that became our staples. 

Still, I didn’t realize just how much we ate out in NYC until we moved to the suburbs. Pre-kids, we’d pick something up from the pizza place one night during the week, and perhaps another weeknight we’d meet friends or coworkers for dinner and drinks. And the weekends inevitably involved eating out in some fashion or another. These days I cook dinner every weeknight pretty religiously, and that way weekend restaurant visits and take-out meals really are a special treat for everyone. 

I’m also kind of grumpy and cheap when it comes to grocery store shortcut foods - no cooked rotisserie chickens or other prepared foods from the deli counter for us. That said, I understand that this is often an optimal alternative to true take-out food for people who are too busy to cook. But it’s not like I’m relying on them and need to cut them out now, which is good. 

Finally, I’ve almost always packed and brought my own lunch. Occasionally I’ll treat myself to some sushi (since no one else in my family likes it) as a special Friday lunch, but otherwise I eat a homemade salad or leftovers from the night before. 

Hence, I’m intimidated by the menu requirements of the Whole30, and the prospect of making sure my meals are compliant while also satisfying for my family of picky eaters, but it’s not like this is my first rodeo in the kitchen. 

When I do eat outside food, I don’t go overboard. The sushi aside, when eating in a restaurant I usually pick something sensible like a salad with lean protein. If I indulge in a sandwich, I make sure to stop when I’m full (usually eating around half & saving the other half for the next day). In my youth I was a total glutton whose brain used the “oh, we’re eating out!” signal as an excuse to stuff myself, since it was a “treat”. 

I guess it’s also worth mentioning here that when we eat out, it’s pretty strictly Greek diner, Italian, Thai, or Chinese - i.e. somewhere I can eek out a decent meal (even if it means ordering steamed veggies and tofu with brown rice while everyone else has saucy deliciousness). The only time we even consider a typical “fast food” joint is on road trips, and even there you can always get a salad. 

Obviously, I’m not perfect. My willpower is shit when it comes to a nice diner bread basket or a steaming tray of garlic knots. But, in contrast to my youth, I’m able to have half a slice of challah, or one garlic knot, and stop there. This doesn’t really help with Whole30 since all that stuff is off-limits, but if I used to eat a lot of something, and trained myself to eat just a little, by extension eating none of it isn’t such a big stretch. 

I don’t eat after dinner (anymore). Because I have small children, we eat dinner around 6:30, finish by 7:00, and have them in bed by 8:00. A few months ago, I found myself picking at randomness in the kitchen during the evening cleanup. I realized that I was rushing through dinner, too distracted facilitating everyone else’s eating to slow down and feel myself to satiety. Thus, a few hours later I was either still hungry, or just antsy and unsatisfied enough to pick at nonsense. For the last several weeks, though, I’ve been more strict about dinner being the time to eat the good foods that’ll keep me full until the morning. (I say those exact words to my kids every single night; may as well take my own advice, right?)

I only booze occasionally. Last January I basically gave up drinking alcohol. Every once in a while I’ll have a glass of wine or a beer at a party, but between the negative effect on my triglycerides, the extra calories I don’t need, and the fact that I have small children who wake up me at the asscrack of dawn even if I have a headache, these occasions have been fewer and farther between. The logic also falls somewhere along the lines of “what’s the point of having just one drink?”  The other night I drank (a whole beer!) for the first time in over 2 months, and while it was delicious the buzz kept me up too late and I spent all of yesterday feeling sluggish and exhausted. Not worth it. So I know I can go 30 days without booze, no problem. 

I exercise almost every day. I know there’s a lot of speculation about whether exercise is actually good for weight loss - you burn a lot of calories but that just makes you hungrier, or you pat yourself on the back and take more liberties with crappy food choices, blah blah blah. All I know is that I got into the habit of working out every morning and I can’t imagine how I’d feel if I gave that up. My usual routine is 20-30 minutes on my elliptical, plus some strength exercises from a 30-day challenge chosen by my sister-in-law and her friends. It might be psychosomatic but I’m convinced the endorphins help me manage stress and have energy throughout the day. Plus, knowing I have to get up early to get the workout in before the kids get up is usually enough motivation to get into bed at a decent hour at night. 

The Whole30 book warns that adjusting to the program may affect athletic performance, so I’m going to proceed with caution the first few days. It so happens that we’re almost at the end of a thigh challenge, so the first day of Whole30 I’ll need to do 40 leg swings, 45 side leg lifts, and 45 side lunges (per leg). The next day it’s 50 side lunges, 55 plie squats, and 45 inner thigh pulses. So maybe I’ll skip the elliptical one of those days, or do it as a quick 10-15 minute warmup instead of a full cardio session. Regardless, according to the book exercising means you need to eat an extra (small) meal, and for my money that’s enough reason in and of itself to keep exercising. 

So there you have it. Stay tuned for my next post in which I bitch about all the reasons Whole30 is going to be insanely hard. D:

[lowcarbnutrients]

What`s your `Dieting Trap?`

What's your "Dieting Trap?"

1. I generally eat the most scrap food when:

A. I'm viewing TELEVISION or at the computer. B. I haven't consumed enough earlier in the day. C. I'm out, or at a celebration or gathering. D. I'm stressed out or alone.

2. The food I can't resist is:

A. A bag of chips.

B. A large fast-food hamburger on the run.

C. A bucket of movie popcorn.

D. Chocolate or a bowl of ice cream.

3. The very first point I usually do after work or at the end of the day is:

A. Watch TV or go online.

B. Consume dinner-- I usually obtain house or work late.

C. Fraternize friends or family.

D. Try to loosen up-- I have extremely stress-filled days.

4. My pals and also household would possibly define me as:

A. Scattered, but focused.

B. A go-getter. I'm constantly handling a million things.

C. A social butterfly. I'm constantly with my friends.

D. A drama queen or king. I tend to burn out a lot.

5. The last time I surrendered on a #diet, it was since:

A. It didn't help. I dieted, viewed exactly what I ate, but wound up gaining #weight.

B. I really did not have adequate time to think of just what to eat.

C. It was as well tough to stay with when I was out with friends.

D. I couldn't quit my favorite foods.

6. At work I typically:

A. Snack while responding to e-mails or talking on the phone.

B. Miss lunch, I just do not have the time.

C. Am the very first one to delight when someone brings food to the office.

D. Consume at my desk when I'm dealing with a big task-- it relaxes me.

SCORING: See which Diet Plan Trap you're more than likely to be managing, so you can discover just what makes you overindulge as well as how you can cope.

If you selected 2 or more A's, your Diet Trap is: Unconscious Eating You're being in front of your computer, exhausted and bored, so you open a drawer as well as take out a box of cookies left over from a birthday celebration the week in the past. It's simply one cookie. It comes to be 2. Prior to you recognize it, the whole box is gone. Noise familiar? You just consumed well over 1,800 #calories. Or, possibly you choose at food all the time while doing jobs yet do not really taste what you've consumed after the initial bite. Or you rest in front of the TELEVISION and also eat a huge bag of chips without also noticing.

I cannot tell you the amount of times I've gone to the movies, absorbed in the movie, chomping on a bucket of popcorn and also a box of sweet, when, suddenly, I placed my hand in the popcorn container and also there's absolutely nothing left. I could have been eating on cardboard as well as it would have tasted the very same. It was a waste since I had not been taking note of the popcorn, so I really did not even enjoy it. You could do away with hundreds of extra calories simply like that: by consuming without thinking.

Zap this Trap:

Figure out your danger zones. TELEVISION, office computer, computer game, and so on ... You may want to publish a notification: "Think Before You Consume." At the workplace, you can create a no-food zone around your desk or workspace. Make certain your co-workers know.

Drink more. Ensure to have reduced- or no-calorie drinks available. Consuming alcohol could load you up and also maintain your mouth occupied, without filling up out your waist.

Have low-cal options around. Always keep healthy and balanced Calorie Bargains offered, as well as prevent having junk food in your home. If there is junk food in your residence, that's just what you'll probably consume. For example, as opposed to buying chips, try bags of 100-calorie snacks. You could additionally part your food ahead of time, not when you remain in a trance. Load up your foods in healthy and balanced sections to make sure that when you most likely to order, you already understand that exactly what you're consuming is a healthy amount.

Stay mindful. Try to take pleasure in the smell, taste and also structure of anything you eat-- in this way you won't wander right into a "food hypnotic trance" and also clear the bag of Cheetos. Remember that random attacks of anything can include up, but simply by focusing, you can save a great deal of calories. As a regulation, never consume anything with greater than 100 calories without taking a minimum of 10 secs to determine if it's actually worth it. Is it a Calorie Bargain or a Calorie Rip-Off?

Don' t snack, have actual mini-meals. It's much better to have half a turkey bust sandwich than a box of cookies. Produce mini-meals to ensure that you're satisfied.

Eat in volume. See to it you select treats that are so reduced in calories that it does not matter if you eat a great deal (e.g., air-popped popcorn, low-calorie grain).

Prepare. Jot Down how you captivate your mouth, and prepare for the next time. What are you mosting likely to do to make sure it doesn't happen again?

If you chose two or even more B's, your Diet plan Trap is: Delayed Feeding How usually have you been on the go and not consumed for a long while? When you see a coffee shop, deli or a snack bar, whatever on the menu looks scrumptious, so you overeat because you are hungry.

You miss breakfast due to the fact that you're on the run, as well as you're truly not that hungry. Or, you can actually opt for something however don't have the time, or your cooking area cupboards and refrigerator are bare. Before you understand it, 2 p.m. has actually rolled around as well as you've had only a couple of cups of coffee and perhaps a buttered roll. You're keyed to eat the initial thing that crosses your path. Usually, because circumstance you don't take a seat and also think of exactly what would be healthy and balanced. Your body is informing you you're starving, you're preoccupied with your job (or your kids), and also an associate or close friend comes by holding out an open box of chocolate chip cookies. You take 3, scarfing them down so quickly your mind does not also sign up that you have actually consumed. Before you understand it, you've downed 6 cookies.

Zap this Trap:

Make time to eat. Don't miss dishes or wait also lengthy between meals (maintain healthy treats like a little handful of nuts, some cut-up veggies, or low-cal grains in your wallet or brief-case just in situation). Missing dishes could appear like a diet plan faster way, but quickly it will certainly become a diet regimen detour-- since your body will simply rebel.

Set it up. Regardless of how exhausted or rushed or emphasized you could be, do not avoid morning meal (or any meal, for that matter). The study is frustrating that consuming breakfast assists you regulate your weight. Find healthy and balanced fast-food breakfasts by looking online at the different food selections as well as selecting the healthiest options (e.g., an Egg McMuffin, at 300 calories is absolutely far better compared to absolutely nothing). Create a standing order at the local deli for morning meal to be provided to your workplace. Bring fruit for a mid-morning snack so you don't overindulge at lunch.

Make your food choices in advance. Choose at night what you're going to purchase for breakfast the following day, or supply up on comfort breakfast foods that are healthy and balanced (e.g., Egg Beaters). See to it to bring your own healthy lunch or have healthy and balanced selections available at the dining establishments in your area (create a food selection publication and also circle all the healthy and balanced foods beforehand). Think ahead as well as know the better-for-you options at your office vending device, office snack bar or in your area. Supply healthy frozen foods (e.g., Healthy Choice, Kashi and Lean Cuisine) or foods that need just a microwave, such as soups with less compared to 120 calories each cup-- they load you up fast.

If you selected two or even more C's, your Diet Catch is: Social Eating Social eating is a bit various from meaningless eating because you probably are focusing on what you're consuming-- you just "excuse" yourself since you're with your friends or since it's an unique event. You're having a lot enjoyable that you're not bothering with calories. You're sitting at a restaurant, having a terrific conversation with friend or family, and the bread basket is on the table, in addition to an exceptional bottle of merlot. You're appreciating yourself. You eat a few items of bread, dip it in oil, as well as have a couple of glasses of wine. For the time being, you ignore exactly what you're taking in-- or probably you just let on your own off the hook, figuring, hi there, you only live as soon as, and food is a huge part of the whole social experience.

Zap this Trap:

Keep track of just what you're eating when mingling.

Eat with a plan. Also when you're interacting socially, do not simply wing it. Have a concept of what you're mosting likely to consume prior to you enter the thick of it. Strategy on getting a Calorie Bargain, like salad or low-calorie soup, rather of taking from that bottomless bread basket.

Learn to spot the low-cal choices on the menu. Seek them out. Make it a video game, and also maintain it social.

Eat before celebrations or any social gathering. Don't go starving.

Don' t really feel obliged to consume a number of treats even if a person supplied them. Learn to state "no" with style.

If you picked two or even more D's, your Diet regimen Catch is: Stress Eating " I have actually had the most awful day. I'm going home and also huddling on the sofa with a pint of Ben and also Jerry's!" Whenever you're feeling stressed out or short-tempered or clinically depressed, you understand you could trust food to applaud you up. Why? We often tend to link food with the way we really feel, and also many foods advise us of pleased occasions. Particular foods-- like anything loaded with carbs-- could even affect our mind chemistry to make us feel calmer.

Not only do these foods comfort us, yet we also have a tendency to forgive ourselves for overindulging when we're really feeling down. Studies have actually shown that when something is actually stressing you out, you're most likely to allow various other things slide. If you're panicking or worried, you may assume, "OK, I just can't stress concerning my diet regimen right now. I have means excessive on my mind. I'll return on track after midterms more than."

So what's the huge deal regarding a few added calories and also fat grams? Well, while food can offer convenience throughout psychological unpredictability, the majority of experts worry the relevance of maintaining control over your internal setting regardless of the truth that outside elements might be unpredictable. Being able to look internal and really feel good concerning your nourishment as well as #health is critical.

Zap this Trap:

Avoid sugar crashes. Eating processed food can leave you feeling tired as well as disappointed. For a far better carbohydrate increase, have anything with One Hundred Percent whole grain.

Keep stress under control. Create non-food means to take control. Below are some examples: Take a stroll (or any kind of exercise), take a bathroom, call a friend, most likely to a movie as well as bring along healthy and balanced foods, blog online (www.blogger.com), get a manicure, take your pet dog for a stroll, checked out a great book, or hear music.

[call-me-rei]

Chapter 14

***I’m sorry this chapter ends weird. It was 6 pages, and if I ended it the way I wanted to it would’ve been 14 pages. Anyways, enjoy this!***

“You’ll be excited just to see me someday.”

---

The weekend passed in the blink of an eye, and before I knew it, it was Monday morning. I sat at the counter in our kitchen not dreading going to school for once in my life.

I was up before Mom since she had worked late last night. Thankfully she had a day off today so I would probably come home early and do something with her if she was up for it.

Rick hadn’t come home all weekend. Part of me knew I should be worried about my stepfather’s safety, but another part of me wanted to say “fuck it” for calling me a cockblock. It’s not like I ever interrupted anything between him and my mom, it was just that my mom didn’t want to sleep with him. Can’t say I blamed her; he had been a real dick lately.

I got up to get another glass of juice and start the coffee for Mom. For once in my life I had woken up before her, and rather than rub it in her face like I always assumed I would do if this were to happen, I decided to be a decent son and make the start of her day brighter.

I would rub it in after she had her coffee. I didn’t particularly want to die that morning.

I thought about making breakfast. It had been a while since my mom had had a good breakfast ever since she got this new job. I smiled to myself as I made the decision, and took the bread, eggs, cheese, butter, and bacon out of the fridge. I put some butter in a skillet and let it heat up. In the meantime, I found a circular cookie cutter in a cabinet and pressed it into some slices of bread.

I put the pieces of bread in the skillet and cracked an egg into each of the holes. It would take a couple minutes for the eggs to cook so I put the bacon on a baking sheet and placed it in the preheated oven. After checking the eggs one last time, I sat on the counter and scrolled through Twitter.

“I thought I smelled something good,” a voice said, startling me.

“Hey,” I said as they laughed at my reaction, “that was rude, and definitely not funny.”

“Oh, cheer up, sweetie,” my mom said, “it was very funny.”

“That’s it, no breakfast for you,” I mumbled loud enough for her to hear and chuckle at. She walked over to the stove to check on my meal.

“Are you making this for me?” she asked.

I shrugged. “I mean, if you wanna think of it like that.” She rolled her eyes and took the coffee off the pot.

“You couldn’t have made something fancier? Maybe some waffles or French toast?”

“This is literally all I know how to make, mother,” I replied with sass. “I’ll make a great husband someday, huh?”

“Kell, any man that loves you for your cooking loves you a whole lot, because sweetie, you can’t cook.”

I sat there with my mouth open at the sass my mom just threw back at me. She only winked and lowered the temperature of the stove before sipping her coffee.

My mom and I had the best relationship imaginable. For the longest time it was just the two of us, so we learned how to communicate with each other. I wasn’t scared to come out to her because we had joked about me being gay for a couple years before the fact. When I came out she simply hugged me and whispered “I knew it” with tears in her eyes.

“Whatever, you’re mean. No soup for you.”

“Save that for when I’m not making sure your food doesn’t burn.” She had a point.

“Whatever man,” I mumbled. Mom flipped the bread and opened the oven to check on the bacon.

“What’s going on after school?” she asked.

I shrugged. “I thought we could hang out if you wanted. We could get a bite. Your treat.”

Mom chuckled, as if she knew I was joking about the last part. “Sure hun,” she said, “but I do have some errands I need to run while you’re at school. Do you think you can come straight home and wait for the locksmith? I don’t think I’ll be home before the appointment.” I nodded.

Mom and I had talked about changing the locks this weekend. Since she and I were pretty much done with her husband’s bullshit, and he hadn’t even come home to apologize, we decided that we didn’t want him to come and go as he pleased. He’d have to earn his way back into the house.

“What time?” I asked.

“Three-thirty. Is that okay?”

I nodded again. “That’s fine.”

She smiled and took the skillet off the stove. I took the bacon out of the oven as she served up the bread nests. When everything was on the plates, she put them on the bar and sat next to me.

“Seriously, some hash browns would’ve been nice.”

I rolled my eyes and mumbled, “Shut up, Mom.”

***

I had no idea what to expect from the rest of my day, but if the feeling from this morning told me anything, it was that today was gonna be great. Or at least less shitty than usual.

I had gotten my new schedule that morning and was pleased to see that choir was my new second period. I loved that. I had gym second period because they couldn’t think of any other class to put me in, so I was excited to get out of wearing basketball shorts and embarrassing myself in front of the hotter half of the male student body.

My first day of choir went off without a hitch. Tyler and Mr. Urie talked me through the warm ups and gave me a lot of music to learn. I also learned about a musical that was gonna be put on in the spring. That was something I was looking forward to.

Now it was time for lunch. I was currently at my locker, putting the books I needed to take home on the top shelf so I would remember to grab them.

“Well, if it isn’t my favorite music appreciation partner,” a voice said from behind me.

“Since when was I your favorite anything?” I asked, not bothering to turn around.

“I was just being polite.” I rolled my eyes. “So listen, we can’t meet up tomorrow.”

I shut my locker and finally turned to look at Vic. “Why not?” I asked.

“My parents aren’t gonna be home – Dad has a doctor’s appointment or something – and they don’t like us having people over when they’re not there to supervise. Something about Mike burning the house down. Anyway, I was wondering if we could meet today?”

“I can’t,” I answered quickly.

“Wow, take some time to think about it, Quinn.”

“Sorry,” I said kind of sheepishly, “but I really can’t. My mom needs me home right after school. I’m supposed to be waiting for the locksmith.”

“Is she gonna be there?”

“No, but my mom trusts me at home by myself.”

“Sweet, then I guess she’ll trust you at home by yourself with me.”

I gave him a confused look, and not just because of that sentence structure. “Come again?”

“We’re meeting up at your place after school, got it?”

I furrowed my eyebrows together in an attempt to give him my most intimidating look.

“You can’t just invite yourself to someone’s house.”

“Hey, I did ask questions.”

“But none of them were ‘Can I come over?’” I said harshly. I expected him to shrug it off and give me a sly remark, but instead he did something I would have never expected.

He apologized.

“You’re right, I’m sorry. Can I come over so we can work on this project?”

I looked at him skeptically. Although his apology sounded somewhat sincere, I couldn’t help by keep my guard up. This was Vic Fuentes we were talking about. He used intimidation and manipulation to get his way.

“Alright,” I said slowly, “you can come over. But be there before three-thirty. I’ll text you the address.”

“Cool,” he said. “I’ll finally get to see how the other half lives.”

I shook my head at his comment as I walked into the cafeteria. What an idiot.

***

It took me until the last ten minutes of my last class of the day to realize that Vic and I had never exchanged phone numbers. In fact, we had never talked outside of school aside from working on our project at his house, so texting him my address would be impossible.

I groaned inwardly when I realized what I would have to do.

I would have to embarrass myself.

I would have to ask Vic for his number.

Kill me now.

“Uh, hey,” I whispered to him. Ms. Pope insisted on teaching until the bell, which was what she was currently doing, so whispering was the way to go. Plus I didn’t want the entire class to hear the question I was dreading asking.

Vic looked at me with the same bored and disinterred expression he was wearing while listening to the lecture. “Yeah?”

“Um,” I started, not sure how to ask.

He cocked an eyebrow. “What is it?”

I sighed. “Nevermind.”

He bit on the corner of him lip before shrugging and looking back down at his desk. I hadn’t noticed that he was writing something in the last few minutes. I assumed they were notes so I shrugged it off.

After what felt like an eternity, the bell finally rang. I took my time getting my things together, trying to think of a way to ask Vic for his number. He must’ve noticed because by the time I had everything packed, the room was empty except for the two of us.

“Uh, hi,” I said awkwardly. He was sitting on my desk staring down at me.

“Hey,” he said with a smirk.

“Can I help you?”

“You’ve been acting weird? You still upset with me?”

“What if I was?” I asked as I straightened up and put my hands on my hips.

“Well, then I’d just have to fix it. Who knows , maybe I could do it later today. Say three-thirty?”

Was he flirting with me? No, right? No. I rolled my eyes at the thought.

“Anyway,” he continued, “I’m still waiting for that text.”

I groaned. The time had come.

“So I thought of something,” I started. He looked at me expectantly. I sighed and decided to stop overthinking it and go with the first thing that popped into my brain. “You wanna come home with me?”

Apparently it was that.

He smirked. “What?” he asked with amusement in his tone.

“It’s just that…it’s almost time…you know?” It was the lamest excuse, but at least it wasn’t a complete lie. It was 3:10, almost time for the locksmith to get there. It was also a ten minute drive to my house so we would have to leave soon.

“Sure, I guess that works,” he said. “Just give me a minute.” I watched as he walked out of the room without another word. Slightly annoyed, I followed him out into the hall. He walked down a few feet before opening someone’s locker. He pulled something out of his pocket and put it on one of the shelves before closing the door and turning the lock.

“What was that?” I asked. “Did you just plant drugs? Are you trying to frame a kid? Did they wrong you?”

“What? No. The fuck?” He pulled out his phone and started typing on the screen.

“Then what was that?”

He slipped his phone back into his pocket and looked up at me. “It was my car keys. That was Mike’s locker. I’m leaving him my keys since I was his ride.”

Oh.

I rubbed the back of my neck nervously. Way to go, Kellin.

“Anyway, it’s getting too close to when you should be home. Let’s go.” He started walking down the hall to the back of the school where the parking lot was. I found myself following behind him like a lost puppy.

“Do you have any idea where you’re going?” I asked him once we were in the lot.

He stopped in his tracks and looked around. “No,” was all he said.

I chuckled as I fished my keys out of my pocket and walked to my car. I pressed the button to unlock my vehicle and sat in the driver’s seat. I stared at my project partner through my windshield with a smug smirk on my face. That smirk didn’t leave my face as he sat in the passenger’s seat and we drove to my house.

“Shut up, Quinn,” Vic mumbled.

[ilistenedin]

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?

When I’m high sometimes. And sometimes when I’m really low.

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?

Like a 4

3. The person you would never want to meet?

A right wing conservative. Or myself.

4. What is your favorite word?

I don’t know that I have one.

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?

A dead one

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?

“Fat”

7. What shirt are you wearing?

A homemade Asajj Ventress tank top

8. What do you label yourself as?

A fucking mess

9. Bright room or dark room?

Dim

10. What were you doing at midnight last night?

Talking to Lauryn I think

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?

13 was lit

12. Who told you they loved you last?

Dani, I think

13. Your worst enemy?

Me, myself, and I, baby

14. What is your current desktop picture?

I don’t have a computer. But when I did, it was Ahsoka Tano vs Darth Vader

15. Do you like someone?

Yes, very much

16. The last song you listened to?

Deja Vu by Olivia Rodrigo

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

I wouldn’t

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

Myself

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?

Any right wing conservative. Clean my fucking apartment top to bottom. And my car.

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)

I like my ears and my thumbs

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?

I would probably look the same but with a beard, flat chest, and penis. I would pee standing up. And jerk offs. And walk around at 3am. And attempt to have sex w someone.

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?

I cannot think of one

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?

Butterflies.

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.

That is an extremely unfair question.

But I guess if I have to choose; a fried egg sandwich on a Cuban bread roll with breakfast sausage, cheddar cheese, and white sausage gravy.

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?

Probably on food

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?

France

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be?

That is also a very hard question. I cannot think of a brand specific but like a sour fruit beer probably.

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? 

No right wing conservatives.

29. What is your favorite expletive?

Cunt.

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?

I’m taking two, idgaf; my MCR hoodie and my MCR Frank Iero Black Parade mask/coffin

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

Well. To not be too detailed. A certain day in 6th grade.

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!

This isn’t A question?

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?

I guess if it has to be a person I would bring back my great grandma. If it could be any being, I would bring back Kratos and Artemis.

34. What was your last dream about?

Pulsating lights, colors, and sounds

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?

Person? Debatable

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?

Yes

37. Have you ever built a snowman?

I built a snow dick

38. What is the color of your socks?

Not wearing any rn

39. What type of music do you like?

Literally every kind

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?

Sunsets

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?

Cookies and cream

42. What football team do you support? (I will answer in terms of American football as well as soccer)

Patriots

43. Do you have any scars?

On my knee

44. What do you want to be when you graduate?

This question does not apply to me

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

All of me. Throw the whole human away.

46. Are you reliable?

Not really

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?

Does it get better?

48. Do you hold grudges?

Not typically

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?

Fox and raccoon

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?

I can’t think of one

51. Are you a good liar?

Very

52. How long could you go without talking?

Days

53. What has been you worst haircut/style?

I had a mullet my senior year of high school. I also had a rat tail thing in like 2011

54. Have you ever baked your own cake?

No

55. Can you do any accents other than your own?

I try lol

56. What do you like on your toast?

Butter or cream cheese

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?

I don’t remember

58. What would be you dream car?

Honda Civic or an Audi

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.

I sing, I dance, and cry. Almost every time I shower.

60. Do you believe in aliens?

Yes

61. Do you often read your horoscope?

Yes

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?

L

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?

Dragons

64. What do you think about babies?

Not for me

65. Freebie! Ask anything interesting you can think of.

No

[lonelypond]

Santa Cutie And The Christmas Cookie Queen, Ch. 5

Love Live, NicoMaki, 4K, 5/6

I have doubled down on farce and romance, tripled down on cookies and will be adding a chapter for the final reveal.

So here's to your finding this chapter charming enough to forgive the delay ; )

MIXING THE INGREDIENTS

Previously, behind the scenes.

Now that the auction was over, Umi could finally pack up. Things had, of course, gotten behind schedule, but Umi had expected that. If they rushed, while not exceeding the speed limit, of course, they’d get back to the station in time for Nico’s end of the night wrap up.  When the newscasters are news….Umi frowned at the memory of Nico being struck by flaming debris. She’d been so calm and Umi had, of course, had the tools at hand to cope. That was the key to their collaborative chemistry, professional calm on the firm foundation of proper preparation. And then there was Honoka…

“Umi.” Honoka’s shout rang across the ballroom, even over the bustle of good nights and good byes.

“Yes, Honoka?” Umi prepared to deliver her refusal to let Honoka drive over the speed limit, even if they would be ten minutes late, in a tone carefully modulated to discourage, not crush.

“Call Kotori and tell her we’re going to go to this caroling thing to sing and spy on Nico.” Honoka hugged the tripod and spun. “We’ll have so much fun.”

Umi closed the carrying case for the mics and other sound gear, “I’m sure Kotori would not be interested in making Nico uncomfortable on her date.”

Honoka giggled, “Nico doesn’t have to know we’re there. We can lurk. It’d be awesome. Then, we can tease Nico on Tuesday.”

“Honoka.” Umi shook her head, picked up the case, “That is not the kind of behavior…” Tsubasa Kira swaggered up, tuxedo jacket over her arm, white collar loosened, tie undone, french cuffs freed, corners of her eyes crinkling with mischief, “If Ms. Sonoda won’t accompany you, Honoka, please allow me.” Tsubasa grinned, hands in her pockets, “I lost a bet to Nico and I want to discharge it.”

“Ooh.” Honoka glanced at Umi, who frowned and shook her head. “I’ll help you with that, Tsubasa”

“You’re the only one who can.” Tsubasa muttered as Honoka looked away to adjust the tripod under her arm.  Umi paused, meeting Tsubasa’s gaze and quirking an eyebrow. Tsubasa shrugged. Umi shook her head. Honoka merrily chatted her way through disguise plans.

“She’s a reporter!” Eli’s voice boomed down the hall outside of Nozomi’s office. Then the blonde fury herself appeared in the doorway as Nozomi minimized the spreadsheet tracking elf overtime hours to ensure no one got too burnt out in the run up to Christmas.

“Who’s a reporter?” Nozomi pushed her chair back; Eli would probably not be settling herself in one of the visitor seats.

“Nico Yazawa.” Eli’s eyes blazed with cold, blue fire. “She’s notorious for risky, on camera stunts. And “solid investigative instincts”.” Eli sounded both grudgingly complimentary and accusatory as she quoted something she’d found. Nozomi appreciated the balance.

“So? Did you find a picture? Was she cute?” Nozomi perched on her desk, leaning casually back on her arms, legs crossed at the ankles.

Eli’s expression turned quizzical and she gaped at Nozomi, “Does that matter? The more time she spends with Maki, the more she'll find out.”

Nozomi rolled her eyes, “Of course it does. If she’s cute and I’m betting she is, Maki’s not even going to hear ANYTHING you say.”

“Of course she will.” Eli paced Nozomi’s office. "Maki has never let anything interfere with Christmas."

“You’ll do so well with our future teenagers.” Eli ignored the provocation. Nozomi sighed, pulling out her phone and image searching for

“Nico Yazawa.” Suddenly her screen was full of dashing smiles, sparkling ruby eyes and a personality that begged to be let loose from still photos. So Nozomi clicked on a video.

“Nico Ni reporting here, live from the scene of a house fire at....Honoka, what’s wrong...what....”

“Cute, thinks on her feet and brave.” Nozomi flashed a smile at Eli as she paused the video, “Maki’s gone; we’ve lost her.”

Eli leaned into a chair, “Maki cares about the company. And no one cares more about the business of Santa than she does.”

Nozomi shook her head, “And no one believes in the good in people’s hearts more. You’ll never convince her that a cute, sweet girl is going to turn cold hearted, rapacious professional.”

“I can try, Nozomi. I have to. Secrecy is essential. Maki knows that.” Nozomi could tell Eli was trying desperately to convince herself she could appeal to Maki.

“Just have a little faith, Eli-chi. Maybe Nico's just interested in Maki as date material, not deadline.” Nozomi stood as Eli turned to go. No response so Nozomi reached out a hand to stop Eli when she got to the door, “You’re in my office now, Ayase. And we follow regulations around here.” Nozomi pointed up, Eli’s eyes following to the mistletoe hanging in the center of the doorframe.

“Nozomi.” Eli grumped, but waited as Nozomi stood on tiptoe to kiss her on the forehead.

“Get some rest, Eli-chi. Everything will be fine.” Nozomi’s eyes were a gentle, generous green.

“Nozomi.” This time, Eli’s voice mixed exhausted and apologetic.

“Rest.” Nozomi turned back to her work  with a wink, “Don’t make me sic Rin on you; I’ve borrowed her to drag overworked elves off their shifts.”

Eli nodded, this conversation and the weight of all her responsibilities weighting her down enough that she could only shuffle back down the hall.

Nozomi sat at her desk and retyped Nico’s name into the search field of her browser, “Now, let’s do some investigating ourselves.”

Back to our regularly scheduled timeline

“Nico’s home!” Nico announced as she opened the door to her childhood home. No one immediately rushed to tackle her with a hug so she figured the little ones must be upstairs  in bed. Her mother came into the foyer to greet her.

“Hi, Nico. Unless you’re superhungry,  I thought you might want to cook? I warmed up the oven.”

“Mama!” Nico hugged her mother enough for all four Yazawa siblings and bounded happily into the kitchen, taking a quick survey of what her mother had gotten out for her, flour, sugar, chocolate chips…”Muffins or cookies, Mama?”

Nico’s mom handing her a measuring cup and a muffin tin, “I think we should save making cookies for when your siblings can help.”

“That’s a great idea, Mama. We’ll make some tomorrow before Nico has to go on her date. Cocoro missed out the last time.” “Date?” Mrs. Yazawa grabbed eggs from the refrigerator as Nico measured the dry ingredients efficiently into a glass bowl.

Nico paused, “Nothing to get excited about. Just the caroling night Nico put up for auction.”

“Oh, right, that was tonight. Did you raise a lot of money for the teens?”

Nico pinched salt in, then turned over the flour and sugar. Next step, new bowl, wet ingredients. “Nico?” “Yes, $1500.” “Wow.” Cracking eggs into a bowl, Nico’s mom nudged her, “Who bid that much for a night with my daughter.” Nico blushed a little, “A new friend.” “New friend or girlfriend.” a more mischievous than maternal wink.

Nico dolloped oil into the wet ingredient bowl, “Maki might be dating someone else.”

“So did you ask MAKI if she was dating anyone else.” “Nico had a long day” Nico whined and added in her head, “and didn’t feel like meeting the maybe girlfriend all sweaty, after two hours at the gym.”

“So your answer is no.” Nico shouldn’t have been surprised at how quickly her mom slipped into interrogation mode. It had been years, but the gathering shame was too familiar a feeling.

“No, Mama, I haven’t asked Maki yet...but…” Nico automatically started adding dry ingredients to wet, puzzling out how to explain the things she knew about Maki from TWIG. Somehow, she felt that wouldn’t meet her mother’s standard of behavior either. “It’s complicated.”

““Do you have a girlfriend?” sounds straightforward to me.” Her mother greased the muffin tins Nico giggled, “Not exactly straight forw…” “Nico, I didn’t raise a daughter who didn’t know how to ask for what she wanted.” The bowl was grabbed out of Nico’s hands, batter pouring into muffin tins as Nico sat back on stool, fingers tapping on the counter.

“I know, Mama. I just really like Maki. And she’s shy. I don’t want to embarrass her.”

Mrs. Yazawa paused to observe her suddenly -- and surprisingly meek sounding daughter.

“MAMA!” Nico stretched to grab the muffin tray and slide an empty cup under the batter stream.

“Oops, sorry.” Mrs. Yazawa finished off the rest of the muffin filling properly, using a spoon to distribute the spillover, “So what’s Maki like?”

“Really nice. Really shy. She’s been in town for work for six months. Every time I see her,” Nico opened the oven so her mother could slide in the tin, “I could just keep talking to her...or listening to her play the piano...or watching her face, you can see everything she’s thinking…” Nico closed the oven door, matching her mother’s smile, “She’s pretty rare.” Nico was quickly wrapped up in another hug, “So she’ll be picking you up here for your caroling night so your Mama can meet her, right?”

“MAMA!” Nico struggled in her mother’s grasp. “Nico is an adult. Adults don’t have people meet their parents.”

Mrs. Yazawa laughed as she released Nico to set the timer, “You’ll always be my baby girl, Nico.”

Nico didn’t have any steam left for a complaint and fell into the couch, “No girlfriend questions.”

“No promises.”

“MAMA!”

Maki’s sleep has once again been a strangely surreal mix of candy canes, flames and Nico tap dancing on a piano. And as Nico’s taps got louder and louder and started to break THROUGH the piano, Maki woke up in a cold sweat and realized someone was knocking on her door. She grabbed her bathrobe and opened it. Umi stood there, definitely poised to crash more than her fist through the door if necessary, Kotori behind her, mild concern mixing into her usual laissez faire expression.

“Is Nico here…” Umi hissed.

“Huh?” Maki stared down at Umi, scratching her head, “Nico? Why?”

Umi collected herself, amber eyes meeting Maki’s as Kotori rested a hand on Umi’s shoulder, “I thought she might…” when Umi only read concern and curiosity in Maki’s glance, she made a quick recalibration, “have left her phone in your room when she was here.” Umi took a deep breath, hand reaching up to draw strength from Kotori’s presence. “We haven’t been able to get hold of her. Since last night.”

Umi’s urgency suddenly jolted right through Maki’s sleepy awareness, waking up the redhead faster than coffee, “Nico’s missing?”

Umi opened her mouth, then hesitated. Kotori stepped forward, “She seemed upset last night...and just took off after the broadcast.”

Maki pulled both of them into her room, light barely visible outside the room’s curtains, “Why are you looking for her this early?”

Umi and Kotori exchanged a glance, Kotori shrugged and started exploring the contents of Maki’s closet. Umi rubbed her chin, “The fire video went viral and her publicist has managed to get her an audition for a good national opportunity, but we need to put something together by tomorrow morning.” Umi fell into the couch, head in both hands, “Everything’s happening so quickly. Nico’s better at this speed than I am. Where is she?”

Kotori had Maki’s suit in her hands, her lips drawn in disapproval. “Do you like this style?” Maki shook her head, most of her attention on Umi, “Work thing.” Kotori nodded as if confirming something.

“I sent her a text last night.” Maki checked her phone, “No reply yet.”

“That’s not like Nico.” Umi was beginning to round the corner to angry. “Something must have happened. Did you see her last night?” “No. I met her in the morning at market.” Maki pointed to where Kotori had laid the suit, “I had a work thing for dinner.” “Nico said she went to the gym.” Kotori was back in the closet. “She seemed tired.” “She could have driven off the road somewhere. I could call the hospitals. Hadn’t thought about that.” Umi muttered, following the logical sequence. Maki felt as if someone had chopped across her knees with rebar.

“Umi…” Kotori came out of the closet with one of Maki’s favorite sweaters, purple cashmere v neck, “I’m sure Nico’s fine. Don’t scare Maki. We haven’t tried her mom yet. What do you wear this with?”

Maki tilted her head, but couldn’t remember anything specific and couldn’t imagine why it would matter, “Whatever.” Kotori frowned.

“Kotori, you really don’t know Maki well enough to be dressing her.” Umi's expression turned sheepish, “Please forgive Kotori. She reorganizes closets when stressed.”

“Clothes should always be a choice, not a shrug.” Kotori’s offered this pronouncement as she ignored Umi’s statement and returned to Maki’s closet.

Maki stood. This was ridiculous. Nico was somewhere. Her robe half slid off her shoulder and she retied it as her phone went off. Umi grabbed it, glanced at the screen and tossed it to Maki, “It’s Nico.”

Maki near caught the phone twice and finally managed a good grasp on it before it hit the floor. Quick passcode, then she read the text, “She’s at her mom’s.”

Umi let out a relieved gasp, Kotori came out of the closet, “Do you have jeans?”  

“Black.”  

Another nod, “That works.”

Umi had her phone out, and was calling Nico.

“Nico! Ina called. We have to put together a test show.”

“What?!?!??!?” Nico’s shout could be heard by everyone in the room.

“By tomorrow. Somebody finally thought your spin your very gay how to cook to get a girl show to a very straight guy network idea had merit.” Umi frowned, “And the viral video of you nearly catching on fire didn’t hurt.”

Maki had decided to intervene in her wardrobe purge, before Kotori got to her collection of motorcycle manufacturer shirts that went so well with her collection of sweat pants with questionable instructions on them. Kotori’s casual couture morning elegance didn’t make her seem sympathetic to Maki’s preferred leisure wear.

Nico’s voice had returned to private conversation levels so there was only half as much to eavesdrop on and twice as much to puzzle over as Kotori held articles near Maki’s face and clucked her tongue, more often sadly than with any cheer. Maki grabbed two hangers Kotori hadn’t reached yet. If she was going to have to deal with so many things she didn’t have a full understanding of, she could at least more be dressed than boxers, a t-shirt and her bathrobe.

And then Umi said her name. “Well, Maki’s right here. I can put you on speaker.”

Nico didn’t need the switch, “Why is Maki right there, Umi?” Kotori froze, shared a guilty look with Umi, then Umi turned away from Maki and whispered into her phone, “We thought you might be…” “UMI!” A shout, then Nico’s voice dropped in volume against, although from what Maki could tell from Umi’s twitches, Nico was not happy.

“I’m sorry, Nico. We were frantic.” Umi sighed, and after another minute of listening, handed Maki her phone, “Nico would like to talk to you.”

“Oh, okay.” Maki took the warm phone, her pulse racing a little, “Hi, Nico.”

“I’m sorry about my idiot friends disturbing you.” Nico sounded calm.

“It’s okay. I was a little worried about you too.” Maki admitted, taking the phone into the little used bedroom section of the suite.

“I may be a little late for our event tonight. As you probably heard, Nico has a big opportunity.” Nico paused, there was a puff of air and Maki imagined her biting her lip thoughtfully, “If I can put something together.”

Maki sat on the bed, “Can I help, Nico?”

“I don’t know. Umi and Kotori are going to come here for a breakfast strategy session to see what we can brainstorm.”

“I have some experience with making videos.” Maki twirled the end of her hair. Kotori had left her closet and Maki could see Umi and Kotori in a very serious discussion on her couch. “And I know a few people.” Maki grinned, “And I’m hungry.”

Nico snorted, “You really will just marry a chef, won’t you.”

“Baker.” Maki corrected, leaning against her headboard.

“All right, North Pole Nishikino, come on over and Mama will make you the best breakfast while I try to get all this done in time for our date. Now give me back to Umi.”

Maki bounced up, phone held out, “She wants to talk to you, again, Umi.” Umi met Maki halfway, “Kotori says she has the perfect outfit for you.” Outfit. Maki groaned. Quick shower and then dress for anything. Maybe @StormCookie was right and confidence was the ticket. That was one more idea than Maki had on the subject. One was also a number Maki could handle, unlike the double digit combinations Kotori had been throwing at her.

Maki was following in her rental, a very unsuited to the weather sporty red convertible. She’d mentioned something liking the feel of the wind when Kotori expressed surprise.

Umi was proceeding at the speed limit, humming as she drove. Kotori smiled at her girlfriend, happy to see Umi in such a good mood. “This is going to be fun! I’m so glad for Nico. She works so hard.”

Umi nodded, smoothly taking the right lane out of a traffic circle. Nico’s mom lived closer to Baltimore so they were headed south, “Just remember not to mention the StormCookie blog. Nico texted she wanted to tell Maki privately when she has a chance.” “I wonder why.” Kotori was enjoying the town they were driving through, Federalist houses decorated for the season, mostly with elegant wreaths, red ribbons and gold accents. Classical. Umi shrugged, speculation wasn’t really her favorite activity, “Something about TWIG. It’s Nico. She’s very private.”

At that very moment, the mother of the very private Nico Yazawa was falling, with all 3 siblings of the very private Nico Yazawa, onto the family couch with laughter as Nico raced back and forth from her old room to the bathroom, trying on different looks.

Maki had been hit by a whirl of look-a-like Yazawas, all red eyes, black hair and high flying energy...well, Nico’s brother, had been a quiet wall of energy, but the family resemblance held, even if he moved at half the speed of his sisters and rarely spoke.

Nico’s hair was up in a bun, dressed in svelte black yoga pants and an oversized Santa hoodie. She slid her seat closer to Maki as her mom put eggs, bacon, and potato breakfast casserole on everyone’s plate.

“Mama makes the best breakfast.” Nico bounced happily in her seat as Maki took her first bite, appearing a proper level of impressed. “Nico learned everything from her.”

“Now, Nico, you know that’s not true.” Mrs. Yazawa chided her daughter as she poured herself a cup of coffee and joined the conversation. “You worked very hard on your own, including those part time kitchen jobs in college.”

Nico winked at Maki, “But I learned about putting in love from Mama.”

Maki chomped down on her latest forkful without actually pulling the fork out, grimacing.

“Nico, don’t embarrass your guests. And don’t you have something serious to discuss with Umi and Kotori?” Mrs. Yazawa was a firm believer in doing things in their proper order and work came first.

“Right.” Nico slid her chair away from Maki, turning to Umi. Maki relaxed as the attention shifted away from her, although Nico’s mom would still catch her glance and smile encouragingly, which was unnerving. “I called Ina. They need at least a 5 minute sample video by tomorrow morning. I started working on a script, which I emailed you, Umi. If you think it works, Nico adds some razzle dazzle and we’re good to go.”

“But where do you want to shoot the video, Nico? Your apartment? We can’t use the studio.” Umi's statement stilled the group around the table. Nico drooped slightly as she tried to remember anywhere they could rent space.

Maki played with her fork for a minute, then cleared her throat. “You could use the Nishikino North Pole Studios, if you didn’t mind the drive. It’s about two and a half hours.” She put her fork down, “I don’t mind skipping the thing tonight if it helps.” Maki smiled at Nico, watching those ruby eyes brighten while Maki ignored the part of her brain that was previewing reactions when she got Nico there. But a text to Rin would get everything started and no one should be using the studio now. And she’d still be spending the evening with Nico. “If Umi and Kotori are busy, I have friends who might be able to help.”

“No.” Umi glanced at Kotori, “we want to help. I’m not sure about Honoka. She’s going with Tsubasa Kira to the caroling dinner you were supposed to attend.”

“Good for Tsubasa.” Nico muttered, then went back to Mama approved practical, “You can run a camera, right, Umi?” “Of course.” Umi tapped the end of her nose and pointed at Nico, “I can do your job too. It’s how I’m the best at mine.”

Kotori giggled.

Maki had her phone out, watching Nico closely, “So…….”

Nico held her glance for a long breath as Maki actively cycled through earnest, cheerful, helpful thoughts, squelching two -- or maybe ten -- "I wonder what she'll do with her lip makeup" segues. Then that smile beamed “All right, Nico is in.”

M: Hey, Rin, I need the Snowflake Studio. To help Nico. And I need Eli not to know.

Rin was hiding out in Nozomi’s office, ducking Eli’s constant ‘when is Maki coming back’ questions and eating a quick bowl of ramen for a snack.

“Rin, instant food is not healthy.” Nozomi glanced up from her screen.

“Did you eat breakfast, Nozomi?” Rin asked.

Nozomi shook her head.

“It’s healthier than that.”

“Santa Claus Is Comin' In A Boogie Woogie Choo Choo Train” began to play and Rin pulled out her phone.

“WOW! Way to go, Maki!”

“Rin? What is it?" Nozomi remembered this was Maki texting Rin and skipped past her first three thoughts about the message topic.

“She’s bringing the Cookie Girl here.” Rin shouted, ramen forgotten, typing urgently.

“Cookie Girl?”

“Nico.” Rin’s eyes glittered with Christmas morning joy.

It was Nozomi’s turn for an “Wow” but hers was discreet and internal. “Eli can’t know.”

Rin tilted her head, “That’s what Maki said. Why?”

“Well, Maki doesn’t know it yet, but Eli found out Nico Yazawa’s a reporter and is flipping out.”

“So what?” Nozomi looked tired enough that Rin wondered if she should have been paying more attention to her friend, since Eli obviously wasn't.

“I don’t want Eli to have extra stresses, Rin. She’s busy enough this time of year." Nozomi rested her chin on her hand, pensive, "And she’s been worried about Maki since the motorcycle accident. She wants Maki back here so there aren’t so many unknowns.”

Rin sat back in her chair, scratching her head, “I know Eli cares a lot. But Maki really likes Nico. And she hasn’t REALLY liked anyone in a long time. Nico found her a piano.”

Two pair of green eyes, both worried about two friends, connected. Nozomi nodded, “Okay, Rin. I’ll take care of Eli. You get Nico in and out of here as quick and quiet as you can.”

“Like Santa down a chimney.” Rin bounded out of her chair.

Nozomi heard herself put Rin in charge of a quiet activity and amended, “Maybe Hanayo could help?”

“Good idea, Nozomi. She’ll want to meet Nico too.”

Maki was leaning over the kitchen counter, watching Nico pull cookies out of the oven.  Nico caught the eagerness and turned with a frown, waving a spatula for emphasis, “DO NOT TOUCH THE COOKIES. These are the finished product for the show. They have to be perfect. Your studio doesn’t have an oven…” “I'll get one…” Maki interrupted, leaning close enough to sniff, until the spatula nearly tagged her on the nose. She pouted at Nico, but garnered no sympathy.

“...an oven Nico can trust, so hands off the cookies, Nishikino.” Nico gestured to someone behind Maki, “Cotarou, Cocoa, play a game with Maki. Don’t let her near the cookies.”

“Nico!” Maki’s whine was outshouted by two excited teenagers, who pulled her toward the couch.

A/N the second: I'm not a big Valentine's Day celebrator, but the Lunar New Year is nearing so here's to health, prosperity and good fortune in the Year of The Earth Dog. Thanks again for your support,  comments, stories, etc. Have a fun festival! My plan is to take a mini break from the non fun parts of my to-do list and draw dogs in Chinese brush painting reminiscent mountainscapes.

[misgivings]

Halloween candy, ranked

43. Peeps: Plumbing caulk. Leftover foam party residue. I don’t care if you made it look like a cute little ghostie. It’s still meringue with poor self-esteem.

42. Popcorn balls: At least hand out apples, Mom.

41. Weird off-brand chocolate wrapped in foil: If a candy sits in a bowl and no one eats it, is it still candy? At what point does it become an artifact?

40. Candy pumpkins: The candy equivalent of eating crown molding. This is for decoration.

39. Candy corn: Though it is similar to its pumpkin-shaped colleague, the saving grace of these most divisive Halloween candies is that you can stick them on your canine teeth and pretend to be a vampire with gingivitis. What would you call that flavor, anyway? Expired sugar? Dull resignation to the way things have always been? Be better to yourself.

38. Lollipops: Dum Dums are legit. Anything else takes too long and keeps you from eating other candy.

37. Bubblegum: See above. As a Koopa shell is in Mario Kart, so this is. It just gets in the way. Don’t get me started on Blow Pops.

36. Smarties: Some blackboard chalk magnate is cackling at the greatest scam ever pulled.

35. Swedish Fish: Like a fine malbec, one cannot appreciate Poseidon’s gummiest children until adulthood, and even then only if they have particular tastes. They’re not worth putting in a festive cauldron for all to enjoy.

34. Taffy: No one else is in on the joke, grandma.

33. Jellybeans: I want to shove candy in my mouth, not consult a chart just to figure out if I’m about to taste lemon or pee.

32. Jolly Ranchers: These are a prize for many children, enticed by a shard of glass that will turn their tongue blue. The discerning confection connoisseur knows they’re one-note and cloying.

31. Airheads: Only ranked higher than taffy because it doesn’t double as a low-cost dental filling. Softer, gentler, still inessential.

30. Nerds: These are heterosexual Pop Rocks.

29. 3 Musketeers: You get out of life what you put into it. If you put in only nougat, you become the elevator music of candies.

28. Milk Duds: I love a Milk Dud. I hate needing a Waterpik and a blowtorch to not look like Austin Powers when I’m done.

27. Pixy Stix: One one hand, I respect the simplicity of distilling the concept of candy to straight-up sugar granules. On the other hand, it’s like ordering coffee at Starbucks and just getting a cup of beans. Do a little work, man.

26. Hershey’s Kisses: This is a Christmas candy.

25. Hershey’s Bar: It’s like eating a dry baked potato. Sure, you can do it. But you don’t have to.

24. Sweet Tarts: Smarties are Olivia Newton-John at the beginning of “Grease.” Sweet Tarts are Olivia Newton-John in leather pants.

23. Sour Patch Kids: A year-round favorite of kids, and for good reason, but don’t you find all that sour sugar gauche?

22. Kit Kat: Humble and workmanlike, like a dad who works nights.

21. M&Ms (peanut): This will be an upset ranking, but I don’t care. These are not bad, but I’ve never eaten a bag of plain M&Ms and thought, “I wish this tasted like a free snack from a bar.”

20. Snickers: The prototypical candy bar. You’ve got your chocolate, your caramel, your nuts. Somehow, that chewy devil, nougat, snuck into this party. But all things considered, it’s earned its prestige.

19. Milky Way: There is a small chance I just don’t love peanuts in my candy.

18. Twix: The main problem with candy in general is that it’s not cookies. These sugary Frankenstein sticks found a crunchy, chewy gap in the market and filled it like capitalist heroes.

17. Almond Joy: A flood of tender, tropical sweetness mixed with crunchy, hearty almonds and enveloped in milk chocolate. My stance on nuts is becoming more inscrutable by the minute. I guess sometimes you do feel like a nut.

16. Pop Rocks: For the kind of Halloween that says, “I WANT CANDY TO PUNCH MY TONGUE REPEATEDLY BUT ALSO HISS INSIDE ME LIKE A MELTING SNAKE.”

15. Nestle Crunch: Look no further for evidence that texture is a major player in the confectionary Hunger Games. The defined ridges on the Crunch bar are fun to bite into; the crisped rice mixed in keeps the sensations coming with each chew.

14. Whoppers: They’re like little eggs filled with crunchy powder that taste like an ice cream treat. Weird, but good! They’ve been around in some form since the late 1930s, which is exactly the era in which you’d think someone would create something called a “malted milk ball.”

13. Lemonheads: This list has not been kind to harder candies, but Lemonheads (and to a lesser extent, their various fruit-flavored siblings) combine a sweet-and-sour lemon flavor that’s not too precious with a layered texture experience. Bonus: The creator named them after his newborn son because he thought the baby’s head looked like a lemon. Delicious and inspired by a casual insult to an infant!

12. Starburst: Picking up taffy’s slack since 1960.

11. Skittles: Just not the purple ones.

10. 100 Grand: This candy bar makes me feel like I have clear pores and a Roth IRA.

9. Tootsie Pops: See, lollipops? All you needed was a little punch of chocolate in the middle to transcend this world.

8. Dots: Soft, juicy and unique in their interpretation of a classic fruit palette. Don’t sleep on these gumdrops.

7. M&Ms (plain): Peanuts are a distraction. I meant it.

6. Reese’s Pieces: On the other hand … You’re going to start noticing a theme, and it’s that I will praise peanut butter like I’m a choosy mom who chooses bribes from the peanut butter lobby.

5. Twizzlers: Black licorice? A poisonous hose. Red Twizzlers? A delicious, edible soda straw.

4. Gummy worms: You could slot any gummy product here, because they’re all pretty legit, but the worms take the trophy home with their name engraved on it, due to the fact that they’re spooky.

3. Tootsie Rolls: It has recently come to my attention that many people dislike Tootsie Rolls. This happened when I expressed my love for it at work, and my colleagues shrieked like I’d told them our newspaper was pivoting to video. They are wrong, and I question their moral fiber. Tootsie Rolls are chewy, they have a mellow cocoa taste and they’re really hard to melt. Also, this fact, per the Tootsie Roll website, is bonkers and worthy of respect on the creepiest holiday: Inventor Leo Hirshfield’s “recipe required the incorporation of the previous day’s Tootsie Rolls into each newly cooked confection, a graining process that Tootsie continues to this day. As such, there’s (theoretically) a bit of Leo’s very first Tootsie Roll in every one of the sixty four million Tootsie Rolls that Tootsie produces each day.”

2. Butterfinger: Just enough of a peanut butter flavor to be warm and familiar, but just different enough to be its own thing. Perhaps the most gorgeous of the candies on this list — more treats should look like geologic formations when you bite into them. Crispety, crunchety orange shale forever.

1. Reese’s Cups: King candy. The reigning champion of decadence. You know you’re in charge when your name becomes synonymous with your flavor combination. When I worked at Amy’s Ice Creams, we were told the peanut butter cups were one of the most expensive crush’ns. Royalty knows its worth. Now, figure out a way to get more peanut butter in that cup.

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