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natsubeatsrock · 2 years

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CBR Fairy Tail Ships Tier Lists

Happy Fairy Tail Month! Yes, I'm late. It's still in the month, so it doesn't count!

I know that I have several unpopular opinions about ships over the past seven years. But...

CBR exists!

If you think that intro was a bad idea, just wait until you see some of the ship ideas their writers have come up with. For the uninitiated, CBR is an interesting website that shares “news” for comics, manga, anime, and the like. The good folks of CBR have given a number of suggestions for alternate ships to the popular ones for Fairy Tail, among other ships. I’ve decided to rank them.

Before we start, a couple of disclaimers.

First, I'm only dealing with ships involving characters for the series I know of. That sounds like an obvious disclaimer to add. However, there are several popular series that I'm not into for one reason or another.

Second, all of these ships are straight ships. Let's give credit where credit is due. Some of the other relationships CBR has for similar lists have same-sex ideas. However, none of the ones I've seen for Fairy Tail, including ones I've left off this tier list, fit that bill. I don't necessarily have an issue with these except for one especially egregious idea. Still, I know that will upset some people. (Or not because you've been spared some really stupid ships.)

And finally, I'm not ignoring the reasoning given for the ships. However, the explanations don't make or break the idea of a ship for me. This goes without saying, but this is my personal assessment of each ship.

With that out of the way, let's do this, worst to best.

Bottom Tier

These are ideas that are... just the worst.

Erza x Elfman

One of two pure Fairy Tail ships CBR advocates for. This isn't necessarily a bad suggestion. It's just that the author had to look at the Strauss kids and think Elfman was the correct one to ship Erza with. That's outright unacceptable.

Virgo x Brock (Pokemon)

I don't think that Brock is incapable of finding someone who might gel with him. It's even happened a couple of times in the Pokemon anime. Virgo just isn't the one.

Mirajane x Naoya Nifuji (Wotakoi)

I can appreciate that both serve drinks to people. That's all I got. Why would anyone have thought this was a good idea?

Low Tier

This happens to be the biggest tier. These are ships that aren't absolutely horrible, but I still question the people who'd genuinely support them.

Erza x Haru (Avatar)

I wish I disliked this more. Though to address the elephant in the room, I'm not necessarily of the opinion that Avatar is anime. However, that might change as anime becomes less associated with Japan.

Mirajane x Neji Hyuga (Naruto)

The real thing that kills me is that there are ships that someone thought are worse ideas than this one. I'd like to know what those ships might have been.

Lucy x Sai (Naruto)

This is a joke, right? Like, we all collectively hallucinated that someone thought this was a good idea. Right?

Natsu x Kyoka Jiro (My Hero Academia)

Earphone Jack arguably could do better than Kaminari. (Note: I like the ship.) Natsu absolutely has a better pairing than Nalu. This ain't it.

Lucy x Izuku Midoriya (My Hero Academia)

Is this better than that OTHER Lucy x Male MC ship? Yes. That's not saying much...

Mirajane x Miyuki Shirogane (Kaguya-sama: Love is War)

If Shirogane was normal, this would be higher ranked. His series is literally about how he's not willing to admit his obvious feelings for someone because that would be a blow to his ego.

Laxus x Ino Yamanaka (Naruto)

When I think of Naruto characters to ship Laxus with, I do think of an under-appreciated blonde. Her name is Tsunade. Maybe Laxus and Sakura if I'm willing to overlook Sasuke.

Natsu x Asuna Yuuki (Sword Art Online)

Do you expect me to believe that Asuna would go for anyone not named Kazuto Kirigaya? Good luck.

Gray x Asuna Yuuki (Sword Art Online)

[Remember to copy-paste the previous entry before posting.]

Erza x Zuko (Avatar)

CBR almost stumbled on the perfect idea for Erza and someone with fire powers. They just happened to trip and fall. Before the race started. In the locker room.

Gray x Rukia Kuchiki (Bleach)

They use ice powers and have black hair. I'd rather ship them with the redheads in their series. (To be clear, I mean Renji.)

Erza x Chad (Bleach)

I could theoretically be argued up to liking this. I just don't like it as a potential ship for Erza. Though, I don't have a Chad ship, so who knows?

Lucy x Ryuji Takasu (Toradora!)

The person who suggested this thinks Lucy would be able to see past Ryuji's rough exterior. I highly disagree with this sentiment. Toradora is my second favorite anime.

Gray x Winry Rockbell (Fullmetal Alchemist)

I can't say that this is the worst idea I've heard for Fairy Tail x Fullmetal Alchemist. But that's not saying much.

Mirajane x Mirio Togata (My Hero Academia)

I have to dock this one a couple points for referring to Satan Soul as a Quirk. Even so, this ship doesn't have as much to it as I'd hope for Mira.

Lower-Mid Tier

These are ships that I don't think are bad. But they aren't necessarily good ship ideas.

Natsu x Kyoko Hori (HoriMiya)

It's not that I don't like the idea of this as a ship. There are just better ideas for both of these two.

Natsu x Rangiku Matsumoto (Bleach)

This would almost be what I wish people would write Nali as. I'd just also have to ignore everything that I think makes Nali such a compelling ship.

Lucy x Shinra Kusakabe (Fire Force)

Is this better than that OTHER Lucy x Fire-powered MC ship? Yes. But, again, that's not saying much.

Gray x Kyoka Jiro (My Hero Academia)

I imagine Gray as being more into music than Natsu. That's about the only reason I'd put this ship a tier higher.

Upper-Mid Tier

Now it's getting interesting. These are ideas that I see have some legs but are missing that extra something.

Erza x Laxus

Honestly, I'm not sure I've seen a lot of people do stuff with this ship, even for all the Erza and Laxus ships. If only someone wrote a story for that Laxus Rarepair Week last year...

Laxus x Hanako Koyanagi (Wotakoi)

To be honest, I don't see Laxus as being too far from Koyanagi's canon love interest. This might be higher if her series wasn't about her relationship. Or if I could see Laxus dating a fujoshi.

Cana x Sokka (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

I could see this put higher on this tier, considering I'm a huge fan of Sokka. The issue is we don't know how Sokka handles his liquor and that's not insignificant. No, cactus juice doesn't count.

Erza x Tenya Iida (My Hero Academia)

Honestly, this would be interesting because both are sticklers for order and structure. They just go about it in two different ways. A bit too different.

Erza x Izumi Miyamura (HoriMiya)

To be honest, Miyamura feels a bit too close to a "normal" version of Jellal to be lower than this tier. There are better ships for these characters.

Mirajane x Maes Hughes (Fullmetal Alchemist)

Great idea for both characters. It would be higher if it weren't for certain things happening.

High Tier

These are ships that would be great to see happen one way or another.

Natsu x Chitoge Kirisaki (Nisekoi)

I can't say that Chitoge is my pick for best girl. (It’s Tsugumi.) However, the idea of her and Natsu together is amazing. I'd love to see Natsu swapped out with Raku.

Gray x Kyoko Hori (HoriMiya)

Another Gray ship that's better than the Natsu counterpart on this list. Honestly, I just think Gray's close enough to Miyamura that this could work.

Gray x Maki Oze (Fire Force)

The best Gray ship I've seen from CBR. A lot of that is just that I love Maki, but it could definitely work. I have to dock a few points for acknowledging the potential fire/ice dynamic and ignoring Gratsu.

Laxus x Mirko (My Hero Academia)

Not the best Laxus ship I've seen, but another pair between characters I like. Side note, I'd love to see Nana Shimura get the same love Mirko does. Or is that because of the circles that I'm in...

Natsu x Ty Lee (Avatar: The Last Airbender)

As a notorious Natsu multi-shipper, it's good to see CBR come up with ONE good ship for him. They also did pick up on the connection both have to fire. Then again, it's not like I'm taking this ship over my FT ships for him.

And, finally...

Top Tier

These are the kinds of ships that I just might have to make happen one way or another. A broken clock is right twice a day, right?

Erza x Son Gohan (Dragon Ball)

If Toriyama was behind this one, it would probably be a tier or two down. But, I could definitely see this done justice otherwise. This would be higher if I wasn't a fan of Videl and her relationship with Gohan.

Lucy x Alphonse Elric (Fullmetal Alchemist)

This one's here mostly because of Alphonse. I'm not big on most of the Lucy ships, but I'd be willing to hear arguments shipping Alphonse with anyone. This would also rank higher if it didn't imply breaking up Al with Mei.

Mirajane x Akitaru Obi (Fire Force)

Up to this point, I've given a bunch of reasons for some of my picks. These next two are mostly based on feelings. As an anime-only, I don't know if Captain Obi ends up with anyone. Either way, I love this idea so much and it’s almost my favorite, but...

Laxus x Olivier Armstrong (Fullmetal Alchemist)

I need this. I need twenty of these. I don't even have an idea of how I would write this in a reasonable sense. I just NEED these two to meet, fall in love, and do all kinds of romance stuff. If you can make this work, message me and we'll see what we can do.

And that’s my first ranking for the month. Expect more between now and the 2nd. See you!

#fairy tail #cbr #let's just tag the characters #lucy heartfilia #erza scarlet #mirajane strauss #laxus dreyar #natsu dragneel #gray fullbuster #elfman strauss #virgo the maiden #no i'm not linking the articles #they are not worthy #fairy tail month: i rate 8/8 #i'm running out of creative tags

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flightfoot · 3 years

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Miraculous Ladybug Season 4 Episode rankings (As of Optygami’s release)

ML season 4 has knocked it out of the park so far! It’s been absolutely amazing, and I’ve greatly enjoyed every episode.

That being said, some episodes have still been better than others (or have contained elements I find more appealing at least), so what better way to show that than with a ranking?

9. Queen Banana

We got a new hero this episode, and she is awesome! Vesperia and Chat have a nice little interaction, and while Vesperia gets taken out, it’s for a good reason - distracting Queen Banana so Ladybug can put glue in her pocket, disarming her. It was a really nice way of showing Zoe’s humility and ability for teamwork, even when it meant giving up the starring role, in order to complete the group’s overall goal.

The mini-movie felt like foreshadowing, what with the “Superheroine of Creation” being an obvious Ladybug expy, while the “Supervillain of Destruction” was a Chat Noir expy, though with fewer connections. Interestingly, it’s also used to parallel Zoe’s and Chloe’s relationship, with Zoe even quoting from the movie at the end.

And Andre’s character development was top-notch! Bully him around to do material things as much as you like, but hurting Zoe is off-limits. She’s Andre’s daughter too.

So why is it so low down? Simply put, it didn’t feel like it changed things as much as Sole Crusher did, nor did it showcase Marinette’s and Adrien’s relationship as much. It was good, but there was less to talk about concerning it than I thought there’d be.

8. Furious Fu

The first episode of Season 4 aired (even though it was episode 6 in production order), we got some lore drop this episode! Su Han gave us a better idea of what to expect from the Guardians and what their relationship with the kwamis had been like overall. Poor Plagg especially, he’s just treated like a bomb that could go off at any moment.

I especially liked seeing Ladybug and Chat Noir’s relationship this episode, and their differing reactions to Su Han and his proposals. Ladybug was insecure about not having defeated Hawkmoth yet and thought Su Han might have a point about the Miraculous being better in other hands, and for this to be something for the Guardians to handle.

Chat Noir meanwhile didn’t give a crap about Su Han’s authority, about this random guy who just showed up and tried to boss them around; but he DOES respect Ladybug’s, and made that known. That he’d give up his Miraculous, his ticket to freedom and also the vessel for one of his closest friends, Plagg, but only at LADYBUG’S request, not this dude.

But it also showed the limits of that, with him refusing to go along with even that when it’d mean that Ladybug would get amnesia. That he’d not only lose his Miraculous, but his closest, dearest friend as well.

The episode was well done, but just didn’t feel like it either changed things as much or showcased character development as much as the other entries on this list, which is why it’s lower.

7. Sole Crusher

This was our first look at a new character, Zoe, and she did not disappoint! She was absolutely adorable and I really felt for her, with needing to pretend to be nasty in order to not be practically disowned from her family.

It showcased how much Marinette had grown as well, with having Marinette see through Zoe’s Mean Girl act when they reunite and not jump to hasty negative conclusions, like she did with Adrien, instead considering that there may have been other factors involved with making Zoe act differently while with Chloe.

Also character exploration and growth for Andre, of all characters! Very unexpected. I really wanted him to succeed in his original dream, and I was thrilled at him comforting Zoe, with him empathizing with her, with acting as a parent towards her, even with her being his stepdaughter and presumedly not knowing her very well before this.

Zoe’s ability to anticipate how she’d need to act in order to conform with her family’s expectations while still getting to do what she wanted (for the most part), like with her pretending to be all prissy and stuck up when interacting with Audrey, or pretending that her messaging with Marinette was a setup to betray and humiliate her, showed a great understanding of the people around her as well as some great acting ability. And her realization of how she’d been putting on acts like this for so long before this, of her people-pleasing and afterwards attempting to just be herself, felt like foreshadowing for Adrien’s own arc.

And we got a few seconds of Marichat. Yay for crumbs!

6. Mr. Pigeon 72

This episode was PACKED. We got to see the followup to Gang of Secrets, with Ladybug freaking out and Alya trying to center her, as well as some followup to Lies, with Marinette trying to “help” Kagami get back together with Adrien. And on top of the stuff that forms the premise of the episode, we got to see Rena Rouge be badass again, Plagg and Ladybug team up, and even Umbrella scene 2, which I don’t think ANYONE saw coming!

Marinette was a lot of fun and we got to see some good stuff from Kagami and Alya here. It felt a little disjointed with how much was crammed into it and I missed Chat Noir, but overall it was really good!

5. Guiltrip

What an amazing episode! Rose is one of the least developed members of the class, mostly being known for being really sweet and being Juleka’s girlfriend, and not much else. Here, we got an inner look at her, at WHY she’s so positive, and how powerful that positivity can be. That she’s not innately positive just because, but that it’s a choice she makes.

Plus the class is AMAZING here. They care about their friends SO MUCH, even if they go about it the wrong way. We got to see Juleka and Rose caring about each other, and even though it went wrong, Rose understands why Juleka ended up spilling her secret and doesn’t blame her for it.

It also really showcased Marinette and Adrien, there different ways of dealing with serious issues, with Marinette jumping ahead and trying to do whatever she thinks will help immediately (help now, ask questions later) while Adrien tried to do the opposite, asking Juleka what she wanted first and trying to stick with that (ask questions first, then help). Both can be useful, depending on the circumstances.

Also got to see a bit more about Adrien’s turmoil, with him being borderline suicidal, and Nino feeling guilty that he wasn’t able to help Adrien with his father, hinting that something bad went down with Gabriel before this.

There was just a LOT to unpack with this episode, but it all fit together neatly!

4. Lies

All of the “Truth” related episodes were amazing! Lies being no exception. Also our first (and so far only) Adrien-centric episode this season.

Lies catapulted discussion of Adrien’s looming identity crisis, as well as his deflections and near-suicidal behavior, stuff that becomes even more apparent in Guiltrip. The breakup was handled well, with it not being Adrien’s fault (he had to leave and lie for the same reasons Marinette did), but with Kagami’s reaction being totally understandable and valid. She was a very active participant in it, even testing to see whether Adrien had lied. And she was ALLOWED to be pissed afterwards, to not trust him, even though she could tell that he wasn’t just doing this for no reason.

I wish we’d gotten more time with her as an akuma, but I can see why we didn’t. There just wasn’t that much time in the episode, and the emotional crux of the episode occurred between her and Adrien - there just wasn’t much she could do as an akuma that was gonna add much impact to the episode.

3. Optygami

Oh WOW did this episode make an impact. Major Wham episode in a season chockful of major revelations, status quo changes, and character progression.

Nathalie and Gabriel actually had a pretty clever plan, spying on the revealed wielders this whole time using the “one sentimonster per wielder, but there can be multiple sentimonsters from different wielders out at the same time” loophole. It meant that Nathalie was actually doing something while she was benched, and I’m willing to bet that she’s the one who came up with the plan in the first place. Say what you will about her morality or her taste in men, but she is an effective supervillain who may be an assistant (and totally fine with that role, which isn’t so common), but one with a lot of agency. And using impostors and try to force a situation where Ladybug would have to give a Miraculous to one of them, and using that opportunity to plant a spy sentimonster in a Miraculous in order to discover Ladybug’s identity and the location of the other Miraculous? Was inspired!

We were baited on there being a Reveal, but that wasn’t exactly a shocker. In any case, we did have a bunch of OTHER cool, impactful stuff.

Hawkmoth stepped up his game with his sentimonsters, making a couple of impostors to control the situation, with Senti Alec and Senti Nino. Seems like foreshadowing about there potentially being more sentimonsters in disguise...

The major developments everyone’s screaming about though, are:

1. Alya getting her Miraculous permanently, being the first “temporary” wielder to get that honor, and putting her in a greater position to help with any akuma that’s causing more trouble than usual.

2. And the one that’s gotten everyone theorizing, screaming, and writing fics: Chat Noir and Ladybug’s seemingly deteriorating relationship, with a special emphasis on how left out Chat is and just how much he’s being kept in the dark, and how he’s beginning to realize this, feeling unneeded. How much Chat’s hiding his hurt, and how that’s going to lead to some sort of emotional confrontation or breakdown down the line.

My ranking of Optygami may go up or down depending on whether future episodes follow through on what it sets up, especially with the foreshadowed Ladynoir confict.

Looks like we’re gonna have a hiatus after Optygami, considering that we don’t currently have airdates for any more episodes, but what a note to leave off on!

2. Truth

This episode was AMAZING. We got to see Luka and Marinette just hanging out casually, having fun together, like with the little trivia game they played on the way to the theater. Luka even showed a bit of a playful side, with setting up the last question so that the answer would end with “kiss me”.

Luka was also allowed to feel negative emotions for reasons aside from protecting Marinette, with him feeling down and a little abandoned because of Marinette constantly ditching - something that was given more context, with how we learned that he never knew his father, and how much it bothers him that his mom won’t tell him who it was.

The revelation of Jagged Stone being Luka’s father was one that’d already been leaked way back in January, though few people believed it at the time and it got little attention. It gave Luka a plotline that had nothing to do with Marinette, something that was sorely needed and one that I’m hoping gets expanded on later.

Also had some great Ladynoir, with Chat Noir and Ladybug discussing their relationship during the akuma fight, when they were forced to be truthful to boot! Ladybug really does like Chat’s sense of humor, and Chat doesn’t have a problem with Ladybug’s status as Guardian, so long as it doesn’t interfere with their relationship.

1. Gang Of Secrets

Gang of Secrets was a great followup to Truth, showing Marinette attempting to cope with with breakup, and the subsequent realization that she has to lie to everyone always, and how little time and trust that leaves for her regular relationships.

Meanwhile, the people around Marinette worry and try to help and comfort her as best they can, even when they don’t really know what’s wrong or what to do. From the Girl Squad to Chat Noir to... kind of the kwamis (though with them it’s more lack of understanding of romantic relationships rather than lack of knowledge that holds them back), everyone attempts to help her, but it’s just not feasible under the circumstances for her to be helped the way she needs to be while keeping her secrets.

And in order to keep those secrets, she snaps, forcing all her friends away.

But they don’t take that easily. They want to be there for Marinette, they want to be friends, and become akumatized specifically in order to find out what was wrong, comfort her, fix whatever it was, and become friends again. They really care for her a lot.

And then- AND THEN-!

ALYA DEAKUMATIZES HERSELF

BECOMES RENA ROUGE AGAIN

AND MARINETTE EVEN CONFESSES THAT SHE’S LADYBUG TO HER.

It’s one of the biggest changes to the status quo we’ve had. Like, Master Fu being introduced changed what Marinette was doing, meaning that they could call on new heroes and she had someone to discuss Miraculous stuff with besides Tikki, and Master Fu renouncing his Guardianship and passing it on to Marinette changed what Marinette was doing on a day-to-day basis more, but... well, it didn’t represent as big of a change in themes, of things that had been built up for seasons. Breaking the Secret Identity Rule? DOES.

Also sets up for some potential LadyNoir conflict down the line, with her not having told Chat that she told her identity to someone else yet. I’m sure they’ll be okay in the end, but it could test their relationship and the rules they’ve lived by since they started being superheroes.

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So that’s my ranking with the episodes we’ve had released so far. We’re a third of the way through the season and I gotta say, I’m really happy with it so far! Can’t wait to see what the rest of the season has in store for us.

#Miraculous ladybug #ml episode rankings #ml spoilers #optygami #queen bee #sole crusher #mr pigeon 72 #guiltrip #gang of secrets #ml lies #ml truth #furious fu #adrien agreste #marinette dupain cheng #alya cesaire

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egoludes · 3 years

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let me come home: two.

Summary: After years at a dead-end job shouldering everyone’s expectations for you but your own, you’re finally free to be whoever you want, go wherever you want. That is, until a series of unfortunate events strand you in Amber’s End, where the sheriff – and notoriously unmated pack alpha – decides to take you in.

Pairings: alpha!Steve Rogers x omega!Reader; side alpha!Bucky Barnes x beta!Sam Wilson

Notes: Wowowow - I don’t even want to count how many months it’s been, but we are finally back in business! I can’t thank you all enough for the love you showed on the first chapter of this and I am beyond excited to share this and hear what you think. Big reminder from the last chapter that parts one and two are all about setting the stage for Steve and our lovely reader. So, this is more or less 5k of more background. But, I really loved introducing Bucky, Sam, and Nat (Bucky especially because he’s going to be huge here!) and hope you enjoy them too. Especially my Heat Wave readers - mechanic!Bucky returns! And I promise parts three and four will be extra juicy to make up for it. Divider credit goes to @writeyourmindaway!

Chapter warnings: Werewolf AU, A/B/O dynamics, incredibly basic knowledge of cars that is probably incorrect

The drive to Steve’s home is short: five minutes from the diner to the base of a wooded hill, another ten to reach the peak. You follow him up a slanted stretch of road with eyes trained on his tail lights, but there are moments when your gaze strays. Sunset lingers on either side of you, framing the forest in a pretty glow. The blend of deep orange and soft pink is hard to look away from, even when you know you should be focused elsewhere, and you make your way to the top in that dizzying in-between.

When you finally come to a stop, it’s on a patch of paved road - a welcome change to the gravel before it - in front of a large wooden cabin. Behind you, the town’s spread out in a panorama, spanning for what feels like an eternity. You can see everything from here: the humble spread of Main Street; the blues and greens of the Hummingbird; and finally, the mountains, majestic and steady beyond that.

It’s the perfect place for the pack’s alpha to be and, coincidentally, has been the home of Rogers alphas for three generations now.

That lived in feel is the first thing you notice when you make it inside. The structure is sturdy, hasn’t so much as gnarled over the years. The decor, on the other hand, is dated. Doilies on some surfaces and beer coasters on others, there are hints of Steve and the alphas who came before him throughout. Still, it’s cozy, and you say as much in an appreciative hum as you pull your bag off your shoulder.

The first floor is all open space, and you can see most of it from your spot in the foyer. It doesn’t take long for Steve to situate you - sitting room, kitchen, bathroom, and master bedroom — before leading you towards the stairs. The walls along the staircase are full of memory; pictures of him and his loved ones that catch your eye as you ascend. You don’t have time to linger now, but make a point to look them over before you go. He’s piqued your interest too much not to be a little nosy.

The second floor, on the other hand, isn’t nearly as wide as the first. There are three doors in the whole hallway, two on either side with the third directly in front of you. He identifies each as the guest room, the storage room, and a study in that order, though he’s careful to call out that no one’s used the study in a long time.

There’s a story there, you’re sure, but any interest in it leaves when Steve presses the guest bedroom door open. The bed inside is too big for the room, one side even touching the walls. And like the rest of the house, it’s decorated in a way that reminds you of your grandmother; a quaintness that’s endearing on a man like Steve. But, as out of place as things might be, there’s an undeniable comfort walking into that room. Steve smiles when he smells it on you -- that cinnamon-sweet rise of contentment as you sink down on the bed at his behest.

“It’s a short tour,” he admits, leaning against the doorjamb, “but this is about it. You’re welcome to anything in the kitchen if you get hungry again tonight or before you go tomorrow. I’m usually up early, so in case I don’t see you, enjoy the rest of your trip. Take care of yourself.”

It’s new to you, how easily people can offer such genuine acts of care. He hardly knows you, yet there’s no doubt that he means what he says. The thought of it makes you return that thoughtful smile. “Thank you, Steve - you’re seriously a lifesaver.”

With a final smile, he leaves you to it, shutting the door behind him.

At the click, you settle further into the bed, toeing your shoes off and sifting through your bag for house clothes and a towel. Your travels so far have been an adventure, to say the least. Just a few months ago, you’d been working a stressful entry-level job on Wall Street. Pressed skirts, sharp teeth, the days were full of routine, but not the kind that’s pleasant. Everything was uncertainty and fleeting gratification as you competed, day after day, for a seat at the table.

Add to that the constant nagging from your family to find a mate — the endless string of blind dates, the passive-aggressive mentions of other friends’ announcements; it’s a wonder you’d endured it all as long as you had.

The decision to quit had been a long time coming. The decision to leave was a whim - the first you’d had in a long time. It was freeing to even be able to make the choice and the lack of commitment only grew more intoxicating from there. You feel freer, less suffocated, and so does your wolf — it’s a change you’d desperately needed.

That feeling is what follows you into the shower as you wash away the day, and back to bed in your loose pjs. As you settle in, you have to stop yourself from sighing out loud. The mattress is as tender as a cloud, molding to your body at every point, and after weeks of motel beds (and the back of your Jeep), you fall headfirst into that comfort. Sleep comes fast and stays put.

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When you wake in the morning, the world is quiet. It’s a long way from New York’s chaos and you bask in it, eagerly at that. The sun filtering in through the window above you leaves kaleidoscope patterns on the sheets. Your hand moves to trace them for a bit, thumb to fractured color, until you’re awake enough to focus your ear to the house.

Like outside, Steve’s cabin is tranquil, not even a hint of the alpha’s presence. Given his warning the night before, it isn’t surprising, but you’re still a little disappointed. You’d hoped to repay him for his kindness somehow — maybe with breakfast, or whatever change you could spare. But, you’ll settle for what you can get: you make a mental note to try and catch him at his office before you leave town.

Weeks on the road have made your morning routine as efficient as it gets. So once you’re completely up, you’re out the door not long after, a slice of buttered toast between your teeth to get your system going. You find your car where you left it at the end of Steve’s drive and you approach with a bounce in your step, all thanks to the night of comfortable sleep.

Maybe you ought to grab Steve a fruit basket before you stop by.

You’re racking your memory of Main Street for bakeries or something close when you settle into the driver’s seat. But, gratitude towards Steve quickly becomes the last thing on your mind when you try to start your Jeep and get nothing but a grinding sound. It isn’t promising, but you try it again, only to get even less response before the car dies altogether.

You groan out loud, head dropping to the steering wheel while your shoulders sink in defeat. It was inevitable, really - it’s been years since you inherited the car from your older sister and it was only through a slew of band-aid fixes that it made it this far.

Still, the timing can’t be any worse; you don’t have a schedule to meet, but it isn’t much of a road trip if you can’t make it on the road. You fish your cell out of your jacket pocket, hoping that your service has somehow improved between last night and this morning. But, you only have a couple bars - finicky connection at best - so, you head back into Steve’s home where you’re certain you’d noticed a landline.

When you find it, you also come across a phone book --- not the newest edition, but recent enough. The list of mechanics in the area isn’t long, so you thumb in the first number you see. The phone rings only twice before someone picks up.

“Barnes Garage?”

“Hi,” you start, perking up at the quick answer, “I just tried to start my car and it’s not working. It made this weird sound at first, then when I tried again, it just died.”

The man on the other end hums and you can hear paper rustling in the background like he’s taking notes. “Alright, we can send someone out right now to tow you in and take a look - what’s your address?”

“I don’t...actually know,” you admit, face hot from embarrassment when he goes silent. You must sound ridiculous. “I’m not from around here, so I’m just staying with someone. I’m not sure about the address.”

A chuckle rises from him that eases your shame just a bit. “Alrighty. Well, it’s a small town — tell me who you’re stayin’ with and I’m sure between the three of us here, we’ll know where to find ‘em.”

There’s a part of you that’s skeptical of that; but for a town so small and a pack so close-knit, maybe it’s possible. “Uh, sure. I stayed with Steve Rogers — the sheriff?”

The line goes silent again, this time so prolonged you think the call dropped. Then, the mechanic speaks up and you can almost swear he’s smiling. “No shit. I know exactly where that is, I can be there in fifteen? Maybe twenty? That work for you?”

“Well, I won’t be going anywhere, so that works perfectly.”

----

The mechanic manages the trip in ten, when you glance out the window at the sound of an engine to see a dark blue tow truck stalking up Steve’s driveway. You come out to greet it just as the man driving climbs out and nearly gasp. He’s as handsome as Steve had been: piercing blue eyes, an angled, stubble-lined face, and deep brown hair gathered at his nape. There’s something familiar about him you can’t seem to place, but it’s out of sight and out of mind when he closes the distance with a wide smile. “Well, hi there -- ‘m Bucky. Spoke to you on the phone.” You give him your name, to which he nods. “So, I’ll get your car down to the shop and we’ll take a look, see if we can’t fix you up today. You wanna come with me, or you staying at Stevi -- uh, Steve’s for the day?”

You shake your head . “Nah, I can come with - I was planning to head out of town today anyway, so I’m hoping I can just head out from your garage.”

“Hop on in then.”

The ride with Bucky is surprisingly warm. He’s not exactly talkative, but he’s engaging; asking questions where he needs to, humming out his interest when he doesn’t. You get so settled into the flow of quiet radio and chatter that you don’t realize you’ve made it to his shop until the truck comes to a full stop.

Barnes Garage sits at the corner of some of Amber’s End’s quieter streets. The large lot outside has a few cars parked with a path between them for new ones to be driven into the workshop. Bucky’s pulled your Jeep right into that path, though he’s stopped halfway between the curb and the garage building. “It’ll take me maybe a half hour to really dig in --- you can stick around or explore, it’s up to you, but I’ll let you out here.”

You climb out with a nod, thanking him before nodding towards the streets behind you. “I’ll probably head out - grab a few more things before I go. See you in thirty?”

For the second time in as many days, you’re exploring Main Street, this time with an eye out for the stores you didn’t visit the day before. There aren’t many, to be frank, so after the first few, you take to stopping in on some of the people you’ve met already. They seem surprised to see you again, but take advantage of your presence to tell you more about themselves, the town, their wares.

You realize quickly that none of the stories about Amber’s End really do it justice. It’s quainter than what you’re used to, sure, but there’s so much history there. It’s romantic almost - like the first turn of an old book or light filtering into a tea shop.

You think you’ll miss it when you leave, even if just for a little while.

When you get back to the shop, you’re a few souvenirs richer and have something nice to give Steve on your way out of town as well. Bucky is sitting at a computer - the model recognizably old but reliable like the rest of the town. He perks up at the sight of you, already waving before you make it all the way in the door and pull your scarf from around your face. “So,” he starts, walking to your car with a hand under his chin. “I’ve got good news and I’ve got bad news.”

You grimace. “Ok --- good news first.”

“Well, I know what’s wrong with the car. The starter motor,” he taps a finger on the hood over the spot where the part lives, “is out. Completely done. But, we can get a part delivered here to get you back on the road.”

“Okay,” you eye him suspiciously. “Then, what’s the bad news?”

“Lookin’ at the places we get our parts from, they’re all outta stock for the model you’ve got. The soonest the part could be here is in a month, and even that might be generous with all the storms lately.” As if pre-empting your shock, he hands over an invoice to confirm it.

Seeing it written out, plain as day, makes you grimace. Staying anywhere for a whole month (or more) had never been in the cards; but, there’s no way you can afford a new car either - you were just barely making it through with the money you’ve budgeted as is. You take a long, hard look at the estimate Bucky’s handed you before taking a deep breath to gather your thoughts. “Okay,” you start slowly, “so how does this work? If I decide to wait for the part.”

He gestures to the door behind you that leads to the lot from earlier. “We have a reserve lot - it’s where we keep all the cars that are waiting on a part for service. I’d keep your car here - free of charge - until the part comes, then we fix ‘er up. You’d pay for the part now and the fix later, when we call you to make sure it all looks good.”

You nod, glancing up from the sheet briefly before looking back at the part expense. It isn’t bad in the grand scheme of things - certainly cheaper than a used car that’ll just give up on you in a few months anyway. But, it will be a good chunk of what you’d set aside for your trip and if you’re staying put for the month, there’s no way you can afford to do it without really settling in. Job and all. “Okay - let’s do it.”

“Sounds good.” Bucky’s eyes are full of sympathy as he watches you; from what little you’d told him in the ride over, being stuck in one place is the last thing you wanted right now. “You want me to get you to Steve? He’ll have some good ideas for what you can do next.”

The nervous knots that’ve been building since the conversation started uncoil some at the mention of the other Alpha, though you try your best to ignore it with another nod to Bucky. “That would be great.”

----

The sheriff’s station is small but busy when you walk in. Bucky trails ahead of you, walking with purpose that surprises you. At first, you chalk it up to the town being so small — maybe there’s an open door policy for the residents. But, then you notice the way deputies and junior deputies let him by without even batting an eye. The ones who do simply nod, offering a smile while Bucky walks right past them and reception into Steve’s open office door.

“Buck?” You can hear ahead of him. “What are you doing here..?” It dawns on you then that they must know each other; intimately, judging by the nickname and the pure ease that Bucky has as he maneuvers the station.

You hesitate to interrupt their moment, but Bucky’s response to Steve’s question is to angle himself so you can be seen from behind him. That’s when Steve notices you and you wave with a sheepish smile. “He brought me, actually - my car’s broken down and I don’t think I’ll be able to leave for a bit. I wanted to make sure you knew before you came home and found me still there…”

Your presence brings Steve to his feet and you notice that he’s in his sheriff’s uniform for the first time. Somehow, he seems more comfortable in it than the casual wear you’ve seen him in so far, but there’s no denying that he looks just as good. “Hey -- you don’t have to worry about that, I wouldn’t just kick you out. I’m sorry to hear about the car, though - anything I can do to help?”

“Unless there’s a way the local sheriff’s office can put a little muscle on an auto-parts dealer,” you tease, drawing a snort from Bucky beside you, “I think I’m okay. I’m hoping we can talk more about where I should stay when you get back, though?”

“Sounds good to me.”

With your big news out in the open, you turn on your heel to leave, but pause as another thought strikes you. “Actually, one thing I could use some help with: know of anyone hiring?”

Steve’s face turns pensively and you can see his mind working for an answer. “Not that I can think of, no…,” he offers, a little remorse in his tone, “but you know what? Most places are willin’ if you know who to talk to. How about Bucky take you around? See what you find?”

After giving his instructions to a suspiciously enthusiastic Bucky, Steve turns his attention back to you. You expect to see pity, but there’s nothing there but genuine concern. You feel a little warmth from it, like you’re protected just by standing in front of him, and wonder if this is how everyone in his pack must feel. “I’ll be back late today, so you can feel free to eat without me. Bucky will take care of you until then and help you talk to some folks about a job. You call me if you need me.” He brandishes a business card from a holder on his desk and pencils his cell number on the back before handing it over. “If you’re still awake when I get in, we can talk about your living situation. Otherwise, settle in for one more night and we’ll talk in the morning.”

----

Over the rest of the day, Bucky takes you to a few shops with vacancies: pharmacy, market, the doctor’s office. Nothing seems to strike a chord for you, though, and you start to grow dejected, anticipating yet another job you have to work out of necessity.

Then, Bucky pulls into the gravel lot of a tavern.

Widow’s Den is the name carved in large wooden blocks over the front door, and despite the afternoon hour, there are a few cars parked in front of it. When you duck inside, a group of older men and women sit, talking over beers.

A tall, broad man is working the bar, his laughter booming over a pop song you haven’t heard in years. Beside you, Bucky beams, scent thickening at the sight, and you realize quickly that this must be the person behind the ring on his left hand and the soft pink mark on the right side of his neck. His mate. It’s adorable to see — this charismatic alpha unraveled at one glimpse of the man he loves.

“Babe,” Bucky chimes for the bartender’s attention as you approach the bartop. Not that he needs to, though; it’s obvious in the way his scent spikes that he’s long since noticed Bucky’s presence and you nearly coo at that too. “Nat in the back?”

“Yeah,” he responds, not looking your way yet as he finishes pouring a drink. “Doing inventory, I think.” Once the drink’s delivered, he offers his full attention and that’s when he notices you. “Who’s this?”

Bucky grins, smile taking on a boyish quality as he slings an arm around your shoulders. “New girl, looking for a job. Her car’s in the shop with me now, so she’s staying with our lovely sheriff until it gets fixed up.”

The bartender’s intrigue is immediate, eyes widening before he grins slyly — as if privy to a secret you’re not — and folds arms over his chest. The pose accentuates the corded muscle along his arms and chest and you have to stop yourself from sighing. Is there anyone in this town that isn’t woefully in shape? “You’re kiddin'. With Steve?” You have more questions than you know what to do with, but there’s no time to think about asking one when his hand is thrust your way. “Well, then, nice to meet you, girlie. I’m Sam.”

The smile he offers you is welcoming, and you forget about the odd focus on your staying with Steve (it isn’t even official yet!) to accept his hand. When you share your name in return, the smile widens and he tips his head towards the stretch of hallway by the other end of the bar. “Head on back to talk to Nat -- Bucky can show you the way.”

The brunet rests a hand to your back, pausing only to give Sam a quick kiss over the bar before he takes you towards the back hallway. The vibe in this half of the building is noticeably different. Homey, like the staircase at Steve’s cabin. You recognize many of the same faces in these pictures as the ones back at Steve’s. Bucky’s against Sam’s shoulder, Steve head and shoulders over the rest. There are a few where he’s even bare faced, looking eons younger than he does now, but not a smidgen less intense, and you work out easily that they’ve all been friends for some time, maybe even since puphood.

It’s admirable to you, maybe even enviable too. You have friends from that age as well, but the unforgiving pace of city life had made it hard to stay close. The smiles in the bar’s pictures, in comparison, speak to nothing but growing bonds, year after year.

You can’t help but smile too.

“This way.” Bucky’s voice brings you out of your thoughts and into a half-cracked doorway. The room is cluttered, stacked with boxes and bottles. And in the center of the chaos is a woman with striking red hair, pulled up and out of her face. Her aura holds a candle to Steve’s; far-reaching, imposing, and immediate. There’s no mistaking her as anything but an Alpha, and when her eyes leave the clipboard she’s holding to focus on you instead, you struggle against the instinctive need to bow into yourself. But, years of Wall Street’s brutal pace (that cares very little for rank) steel you. You see something akin to amusement flash in her eyes when you meet her gaze head-on.

“What did I tell you about bringing in strays, James?” Her tone is level, but the words have no real bite. You look up at Bucky warily still, who reassures you with a little smile.

“This one’s not a stray --- not really, anyway.” He loops an arm around your shoulder again and you can tell the familiarity intrigues Nat. “She’s new in town - staying for a month or two until I can get her car squared up, so we’re hopin’ to find her a place to work.”

“Just a couple? That’s not a long time --- I mean, by the time you get settled in, you’re gonna be out of here.” A valid concern; one that the other shop owners had shared when Bucky told them your predicament. There isn’t much you can say to ease the worry, but it turns out you don’t have to. Nat turns the rest of the way to set her scrutinizing gaze on you properly and the look compels you to stay put; almost as if you’re presenting yourself to her. A stretch of silence sets in and the longer it goes, the more convinced you are that she’s about to reject you outright. Then, she clicks her tongue. “Hm. We don’t need much right now, but I could throw you a couple bucks if you want to help us bus tables or something. This is the only spot to really drink in town, so we could always use the help on busy nights.”

You’re so relieved you could kiss her, but you don’t need superhuman instinct to know that would not go well. You settle instead for a wide smile, the sort that’s contagious to the Alphas in the room who start beaming with you. “That would work for me!”

“Good,” she grins, setting her clipboard aside to cross her arms, “now to celebrate our new arrival.”

----

You spend the rest of the day at Widow’s Den, getting to know Sam, Bucky, and Natasha over glasses of their best liquor. They confirm your suspicion that they’ve known each other for some time: Steve and Bucky are lifelong friends, brought together by a schoolyard fight started by a Steve who wasn’t even half the other boys’ heights. Meanwhile, Sam and Natasha came into the fray during high school years, transfers from their deep South and Russian hometowns respectively. But, they folded into the fabric of the boyhood duo easily and had been a foursome ever since.

You still don’t know where Sam and Bucky’s relationship turned romantic, but there’s an ease there that makes you guess it has been a while. Natasha, like you, is unmarked, but it’s rare for Alphas to do that anyway. You’re curious to learn more about her in particular.

As time moves on, the bar fills more and more and you get a glimpse of what your life will be like for the next few weeks. The crowd is certainly diverse - people of all ages filing in with friends or on their own. In an odd way, there’s two bars existing in one - young and old, energetic chatter and introspective talk.

By the time you leave, you’re a little tipsy and Bucky guides you out with a hand on your back. So far, you haven’t come across any other omega in their circle, and you wonder if his constant touch is a result of that instinct to protect you. The conversation on the ride back to Steve’s flows more freely now that you’ve spent so much time together and when he drops you off, he surprises you with an offer for a hug. When he glimpses that surprise, he laughs. “None of that now - you’ll be seeing a lot of me from now on, so we’re friends, sweetheart.”

You laugh and step into his arms - you suppose he’s right.

----

It’s near one in the morning when Steve finally comes home. His midnight patrol had been as uneventful as usual ---- a blessing, he thinks, considering how distracted he’d been during the run. His wolf is restless, agitated by the thought of this new omega being around longer than expected. He found his thoughts trailing to her during his time in the woods, particularly as he passed the quarry he’d found her in, and there was an eagerness to find out how the rest of the day with Bucky had gone.

He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t a little nervous. His friend, dear as he is, can be a handful, even for him.

When he comes in, he’s shocked to find you still awake in the living room, a mug of what smells like herbal tea in your hand as you flip through a book from his shelf. You look up at him from the book, a dopey smile to your face, and that’s when the other, underlying smell on you hits. Alcohol --- something woody that’s familiar. He guesses Bucky must’ve taken you to Widow’s Den, which would explain why you’re still up at this time.

“Hey,” he speaks up, nodding at you, “couldn’t sleep?”

You shake your head, book forgotten as you cradle your tea with your other hand. “It’s been a busy night - still a bit wired!”

Fair, he thinks. “Tell me about it - did it go well with Buck?”

You start to ramble about the day - the places you tried, the time at Widow’s Den, the offer from Nat you ultimately accepted. He tries not to tense too visibly, but he can’t hide the way his scent sharpens the way it often does when an Alpha is on edge. He can see the impact it has on you instantly; the way your excitement slows and your eyes dart to try and pick out what caused it.

He reassures you - or does his best to - with a smile, urging you on. He won’t explain this yet, but the crowd at Widow’s Den can be rowdy when they want to be, especially when they’re from out of town. Nat and Sam will show you the ropes --- and step in where they have to --- so you’ll be in good hands; but he wouldn’t be Steve if he didn’t worry. You’re the newest wolf in town now --- a part of his pack, even if just for a short while.

When you’re done recapping the day, his smile grows, the gesture deliberately wide to make up for his worry catching you off-guard. “Well, I’m glad to hear it went well - Nat and Sam are good people, they’ll take care of you.”

“I believe it.” You pause, running a finger along the rim of your mug. “Which reminds me, I… I don’t have to stay here. Once I start working, I think I’ll be able to check in at the Hummingbird, see if that room’s opened up.”

Steve gives you the same stern look from the diner and you almost giggle at the sight. It’s hard to see the same intimidating alpha now that you’ve heard a little about him from his friends. “Come on - what kind of pack leader would I be if I kicked you out now?” He stands from the couch, eyes -- and stomach -- starting to turn towards the kitchen. “I won’t stop you if you prefer the motel, of course, but the offer to stay here will be open until your car’s ready to go.”

“Are you sure...?”

His stern face softens, giving way to another smile. “Positive - don’t worry about it, okay?”

After the last twenty four hours, it’s hard to doubt his capacity for kindness, but reassurance is always appreciated. You thank him one last time as he stalks into the kitchen, wishing you a good night, and when your tea is finished, you pad up to the guest bedroom with your chest feeling as warm as your tummy.

As you finally doze, it’s with a head full of excitement; like a kid the night before a field trip. You didn’t expect it, sure, but you’re ready, anticipant, for the start of your life for the next two months.

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #alpha!steve rogers x reader #mcu x reader #werewolf!steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers fanfic #werewolf!steve rogers #alpha!steve rogers #steve rogers fanfiction

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spider-pxrkers · 4 years

Text

you’re worth more || popular!peter parker x female reader

summary: you and peter used to be best friends before he re-brandished himself into someone more popular and forgot about you. a few years later, he comes to you with an unusual favour.

a/n: this was an entry for @quackeroos writing challenge under the “fake dating” prompt. if you’d like, go check it out:)

warnings: fake dating trope, angst, fluff, swearing, peter needing a hug:3

masterlist || add yourself to my taglist!

i do not own any gifs used. all credits go to the original creator

“I don’t get it, what is it you want from me?”

The moment you tried you recalling the last conversation you had with the boy before you, you felt yourself get flung back into a memory in middle school, where a younger you and a rather scrawny, smaller boy sat huddled next to each other within the crook of his bunk bed, under a hurdle of blankets with a bowl of chips between the two of you. You both had your gazes fixed onto the bright screen of the laptop before you. Some silly science film Peter always talked about played all because he’d won the coin flip deciding who’d pick the movie that night. That night was the last time you remembered hanging out with him, the last night you and Peter Parker were actually friends.

“I want you,” as he spoke up from opposite you, snapping you back to reality, your eyes finding him leaning in much closer than he was a few moments ago. “To be my girlfriend for a couple months.” His tone was nonchalant as he spoke, his voiced laced with relaxed confidence, as if he knew he was going to leave the conversation getting what he wanted. “Or pretend to, at least.”

You narrowed your eyes at the boy before you. The Peter in front of you was definitely not the same boy you knew years ago. His arms lay on the cafeteria table in front of you, his fingers resting intertwined with one another has his chest rested slightly above, leaning in as if he was telling you some forbidden secret. His hair was lightly gelled and his eyes were the same brown shade, yet with something unfamiliar resting within them.

Peter Parker had grown from the shy nerd he used to be, no longer dawning T-shirts with silly puns on them but instead draped in leather and fitted shirts. He was pushed around constantly in middle school, picked on for every little thing he’d do before he decided to change it all and change who he was. He was mocked, pushed around and more or less tortured by the very people he now calls his friends.

It was the summer after ninth grade when he returned to school. He was taller, toned and more attractive than ever with a completely new wardrobe and contacts instead of his usual thick, round glasses. He abandoned you and Ned Leeds, moving on to a completely new clique. A few years went by and now, he’s one of the most popular kids in school. So, why did he want you to be his girlfriend?

You leaned back a little bit, leaving the once close proximity of his face to yours. “You want me to be your girlfriend?” You let out a laugh laced with satire. “And what? Lean on your arm for a couple weeks until you find yourself another girl to fuck?”

You expected him to be offended but all your words did was trigger a smirk hidden behind a smile. “It won’t be like that. The guys,” you glanced behind him at the table he was at before he had come up to talk to you, full of jocks who tried their best to look like they weren’t looking at your conversation unfold. You rolled your eyes at them before focusing your attention back to Peter. “Made a bet with me. They want to see how long it’ll take for me to, you know..” He spoke calmly, looking at you expectedly, as if you were supposed to catch on.

Unfortunately, you did.

You tilted your head at him, folding your arms almost defensively as you furrowed your eyebrows. “Know what, Parker?”

“Come on, Y/N. They want to see how long I could a keep a girl like you for.”

Your raised an eyebrow, “A girl like me?”

His smile disappeared as he sighed. “You know what I mean.”

“I really don’t.”

Silence lingered over the two of you and Peter leaned back.

This was going to be a lot harder than he thought.

It was no surprise you weren’t as known in the school as most others. Truth was, most of the kids in Midtown annoyed you. You preferred staying under the radar, having a few close friends rather than a ship full of them.

You stared at him, hardly recognizing the boy who once belonged to your friend group. After a few more moments, you gave in to the silence. “You expect me to go along with this?”

“I didn’t have to tell you about the bet alright?” He said to you. “But I found it, in the goodness of my heart,” he placed a hand over the left side of his chest, earning an amused look from you. “To tell you instead of screwing you over. I thought maybe we could work out a deal.”

You nodded slowly, catching on. “What do you get out of this?”

His eyes looked up to meet yours, a ghost of a smile making its way back onto his face as he shrugged. “Five-hundred a month.”

Your jaw dropped, “Five hundred?” All he did was nod. Your eyes shot back to the jocks table as your eyes landed on the “leader”, Martin. You studied him as you recalled your friends tell you his dad was some owner of a big oil company. You figured he was the type of guy who’d push his money wherever he wanted, but never would you have thought him to be this low. But why on earth were you worth five hundred a month? “Why would a guy like you need that much cash, Parker?” You always thought he was as well off as the other guys, he was popular and brandished himself such anyway.

His eyes faltered for a bit at your question, his eye twitching as he looked you over. It was as if a mask slipped off his face for a split second, revealing a look of doubt before it withered and the mask came crawling back on. “I need to get a couple things done.” he said simply.

“Uh-huh,” you decide not to push it. “And what do I get out of all of this?”

His eyes glistened with mirth. “Twenty percent?”

“Thirty.” You shot back.

“Twenty.” He leaned back onto the table, eyes challenging you. But you wouldn’t back down. If you were going to take part in this stupid act, might as well get something out of it.

“Twenty-five.”

The air grew tense as you stared down into his eyes which were locked directly onto yours. You swore you saw the corner of his mouth tug upwards as he spoke, “No one can know you know about this Y/N.”

All you did was smile as you reached out to grab the apple in front of you before taking a bite. “Know about what?”

“This is, by far, the stupidest thing you’ve ever done.”

You and MJ were sat in the bedroom of your apartment afterschool, you at your desk chair while she lay on her back on your bed, her hands folded behind her head accompanied by a blatant look of judgment etched onto her face. You told her about your and Peter’s arrangement, despite him telling you not to, the moment after it happened; an arrangement which she heavily did not approve of. She never liked the popular crowd in school, she was convinced they were all spoilt and shallow.

Some of them were.

“Come on MJ,” you’d been trying to make her see your point of view the entire day. But if there’s one thing your best friend was, it was stubborn. “The money isn’t a lot yeah but you know I need to start saving for college and-”

MJ shot up from her position, a humorless laugh escaping her. “Oh please,” her laughter continued, even louder confusing you as you stared at her.

You fought the smile appearing as your watched your friend’s outbreak, despite your puzzlement. “Why are you laughing?”

She wiped a tear from eye as her laughter resided, standing up to tower over your position on the chair, her grin still wide. “Don’t pretend you’re in this for the money.”

“What do you mean-”

“You’re doing this because by the end of it, you’re hoping you’ll fish out the ‘real’ Peter Parker from somewhere.” You titled your head at her, trying to grasp the point she was trying to make. She leaned in closer to you, her face inches from yours as she spoke lowly, “You know, the guy you had the biggest crush on in eight grade?”

You scoffed at her expression, “I did not-“you paused mid-sentence as you stared at MJ’s expected look on her face. “Alright, maybe.”

Her grin widened even more, “Ha! I knew it!” She pumped her fists in the air while you shook your head as she did a mini celebration dance.

“But that’s not why I agreed to this.” You stated.

“Sure it isn’t.” She looked over at you, her chuckles seizing as she gave you a look of sympathy. “You know if you do this, you can’t expect anything from him after?” You furrowed your eyebrows at her. “He doesn’t feel the same about you Y/N, the two of you haven’t spoken since middle school. And he’s not that same kid anymore. ” MJ walked over to you and crouched in front of your sitting frame. “You can’t change him back into that kid. This is only going to end with you getting hurt.”

You slowly shook as you looked at her. She was right. Peter wasn’t the same kid he was years ago. He usually sat in large groups with the jocks at the back of every class, laughing at their lame jokes and taking part in their stupid ideas of fun. He looked different, dressed different, talked different, and as you thought over your arrangement, a quick flash of doubt entered your head.

But when your eyes peered behind MJ at the picture of you and Peter in ninth grade on your bedside table, posing with Ned Leeds in front your group’s first place science project with peace signs and wide smiles, you figured the nerdy kid you’d been in love with since you were thirteen was still in there, somewhere.

You were free during fourth period, and you chose to spend that time alone in the gymnasium. You didn’t know the other kids you were free with, and preferred the time alone anyway. On most days you’d sit on the bleachers and catch up on homework or a late project. Today however, you had your headphones plugged in, a song by your favorite artist playing. You sat with your eyes closed, content, for a few moments before being interrupted by feeling someone place their hand on top of yours. Your eyes shot open as you drew your hand back quickly, looking to your left to see Peter Parker sitting. An expression you couldn’t recognize rested on his face as you saw his hand next to yours. “What were you just doing?”

“Holding your hand?” he said expectedly. “You know, the thing people who are ‘in love’ do.” He positioned his body to instead straddle the bleacher seat, his front facing your side, separated by your book bag.

You scoffed, removing your eyes from his gaze, instead looking directly ahead of you at the empty gymnasium. “We are not in love.”

“Of course we aren’t,” he said. You glanced over at him, a bit of hurt panging in your chest before pushing it away. “But if we’re going to be telling everyone we’re dating, we might as well give them something to believe.” He spoke with a mischievous tone. You looked over at him. He was in his usual brown jacket, a smirk prominent on his face.

“Something like what, Parker?” you challenged.

He chuckled at you as he leaned in closer to you, his breath warm. “How about I show you?”

You laughed as you shifted to your side, trying to put a little distance between you and the boy next to you. “Alright, we need some rules if we’re going to do this.”

His lips turned into a pout, obviously taken aback by your pulling away, but he wasn’t going to show you that. He straightened his posture, clearing his throat. “What kind of rules?”

“Rules that,” you began. “Will entail boundaries, what we can do, what we can’t do.” This is my first experience with a relationship, so we-”

“Wait, wait, wait, hold up,” he let out, leaning back and holding his hand out in front of him. “You’ve never dated anyone before?”

You caught his eyes, feeling as if he was judging you. You felt a pinch of insecurity as he looked at you but ignored it. “Yeah, so?”

His eyes softened as his smirk turned into a light smile, it almost seemed genuine to you. “Nothing,” he said quietly. “Just didn’t think Y/N L/N never got around.”

“Oh right,” you grinned. “Just because I don’t throw myself at every girl with two eyes and a round-”

He laughed. “Alright, alright. I get your point, I’m not judging.”

The two of you sat together during your free period, creating a list of rules for your ‘relationship’. After the two of you were done, you sat back satisfied as you looked over the list you wrote. The first rule was at the top of the page, written by Peter:

No telling anyone the relationship isn’t real.

You chose not to admit to Peter that MJ already knew, it wasn’t like she’d tell anyone anyway.

After his rule you wrote,

No kissing in private or in public.

“That one’s stupid.” He’d said when you wrote it. “How are we supposed to sell a relationship if I can’t kiss you?”

“You’ll find other ways.” Was all you said, earning a smirk from him.

You came up with the third rule as well,

At least one movie night every week, with Y/N’s choice of movie.

Peter protested at the last part, but you wouldn’t budge. If there was anything that could maybe help Peter get back to his regular self, it was a binge of the silly sci-fi movies he loved.

The last rule was mutually chosen between the two of you and in his writing was scribbled,

After the relationship has ended and both Peter and Y/N are paid, the two would never bring up the relationship again.

Peter didn’t really care about the rule, all this relationship was to him was a way to earn money. You agreed to it too; you hoped to get the old Peter you knew back, not the one who threw himself at every girl he saw and picked on any kid smaller than him. If it couldn’t happen by the end of a few months, you didn’t want to be involved with him.

You neatly folded the paper and tucked it into your bag before you and Peter shook hands in agreement to this new relationship.

This was going to be fun.

It’d been three weeks since you began on your relationship. You did what regular couples did, went on dates (making sure to post a lot of pictures online for everyone to see) and spending most of your school days connected at the hip. You got to know the new Peter a lot more, something you can’t say was easy. Most of the times you hung out were when he was with his friends. That meant seeing him laugh at obnoxious demeaning jokes, and making some of them himself. They’d make fun of other students and you’d give him a pointed to look if he ever went too far, earning the vaguest shimmer of guilt before his regular smirk would settle back onto his face, and he’d delve more into the joke, earnings loud guffaws and bumps from his friends. Whenever they would make a joke about Ned, you’d shake your head and leave; that was a line you didn’t want to see Peter cross.

The next few weeks also consisted of you and Peter getting used to having each other in the other’s lives; to really sell the two of you ‘dating’, the two of you spent a lot more time together. In the beginning, Peter asked you to sit with him in classes the two of you shared. When he first asked you, you were hesitant and honestly reluctant. You were serious about your classes and the jock’s reputation screamed nothing but, ‘Distraction.’

Peter knew you’d be uncomfortable, he knew the moment he saw your face fall when one of his friend’s made some stupid joke about your ‘relationship’, as he pulled you to sit with him in the back row, despite your protests. You were quiet the entire class after that, even removing your hand from the grasp of his. And after the bell rang, you got up and left without saying a word. He wanted to go after you, but was stopped by his friends pulling him back and sending pats on his back and laughter in a deep mocking voices, a congratulations for going along with Martin’s bet. His face was hard, all he felt was guilt as his friends pulled him out of the class and out the doors of Midtown.

As you walked up the stairs of your apartment, you felt your phone buzz in your pocket. Pulling it out, you swiped your lock screen to see a text from Peter.

‘Hey.

I’m sorry about today

It was stupid to make you do that.’

You shook your head, almost laughing at his text, before replying back with one of your own.

‘Didn’t know you were such a sap, Parker.’

You bit your lip nervously as you saw him typing back. You were about to tuck your phone back in when the screen lit up.

‘Ha ha very funny.

I need to talk to you about something, call me when you reach home.’

Your eyebrows narrowed while you read his message before running up the stairs and into your apartment. The moment you fell back onto the bed you dialed Peter’s number, pressing the phone to your ear.

“Hey, babe.” The word slid of his tongue so smoothly through the phone, it made you cringe.

“Please, don’t call me that when we’re not in public.” You mumbled as you perched the phone between your ear and shoulder, playing with your fingers.

“Alright, babe.”

You could hear his soft chuckle at your reaction as you cringed out loud once more. “What do you want, Parker?”

He didn’t answer for a bit, a silence lingering between the phone lines. When he spoke again, his voice was lower, almost gentle. “After you left today,” he began. “The guys asked about you, about us.”

You lent back into your pillows as you listened, “What about us?”

“They well- you know how they are.” Your face tightened as he spoke to you. He was silent for a little longer before sighing, giving in completely. “Martin says he won’t pay unless he has proof we...you know, slept together.��

Your eyes closed as you heard him, anxiety filling you. “What do you mean proof?”

“It doesn’t have to be like a video or anything,” Peter’s voice grew more and more soft, realizing how this must’ve sounded to you, how freaked out you’d be. “You could maybe just come over tonight maybe and-”

“And do what, Parker?” your tone was thick, you hated where this was going.

“Nothing, absolutely nothing.” He quickly reassured you. “We could just hang out, watch a movie or something. I’ll send him some stupid picture and nothing needs to happen.” You heard his breath hitch. “I promise.”

Silence filled you once again as you grew uncertain. This shouldn’t be weird, you’d had several sleepovers with Peter when you were younger, but you knew this would be different, even if nothing happened between the two of you.

The last few weeks played tricks with your mind. You were convinced you didn’t need to like Peter to keep up your fake relationship, but something inside you thought otherwise. As you hung out more and more, the pair of you grew more comfortable with one another.

You hated to admit MJ was right, but as the days went by, you felt your feelings from four years ago resurface. It was slow at first, it began when hesitant fingers crawling on the other’s turned into tender arms draped across the other’s shoulder. It grew as the two of you spent afternoons watching your favourite movies; you even decided to give his new love for crime movies a try. And after several mornings of grabbing coffee together before school, he eventually learned your order and would have it ready before you’d enter the coffee shop, making you realize this ‘relationship’ was going to get a lot more complicated, especially since you knew he didn’t feel the same. It’d be wrong for you to go to his place, to spend the night there, without him knowing how you felt. But you doubted he cared, he was Peter Parker for God’s sake, he could have any girl in New York with a snap of his fingers, why would he want you? Some girl from his past who he suddenly decided to talk to for five hundred bucks?

After a long time of saying nothing you took a deep breath. It would be wrong of you, but it wasn’t like anything between the two of you would happen anyway.

“I’ll be there by eight.”

Within the hours of four to eight, you began to get ready. After your shower, you called MJ -much to her distaste- to confer about the outfit you were going to wear which ended up turning into a two hour long rant session with your best friend about whatever. After, you pulled on your jeans and a crop top, before pulling it off and replacing it with a light blouse instead. You packed a separate bag with pyjamas and whatever else you needed. When you were ready, you headed out the door and left for the address Peter sent you.

You’d seen his apartment before. It was located close to where you stayed, a smaller apartment that most. As you climbed up the stairs and knocked on his door, you felt yourself grow excessively more nervous. You adjusted the bag’s strap on your shoulder before looking up to see Peter open the door.

His hair wasn’t gelled like it usually is, instead in light wet curls, you assumed he just stepped out of a shower. A plain white tee-shirt clung to him above worn blue jeans.

“You’re early.” Was all he said with a smirk as he stepped back to let you in.

Why did he always have to smirk?

You walked into the apartment and down a short corridor before entering the living room. You recognized a few decorations lying around, the frames on the walls and picture of his uncle Ben. It’d been so long since you’d been in the Parker residence, it almost felt the same from all those years ago. But as you looked around, you noticed no science fair trophies or class awards on the end table like there used to be. Instead, laid simple miscellaneous decorations. Gold medals no longer decorated the walls, Peter must have made his aunt remove all of it when he got to high school.

“So, what movie did you get?” Peter’s voice sounded behind you pulling you from your thoughts and as you turned around, you saw him leaning against the kitchen wall, his hands fidgeting.

He probably just wanted to get this night over with.

You bit your lip as you reached into your bag, pulling out a DVD disk. Here goes nothing. “I brought Star Wars,” you said quietly as you watched his face shoot up to meet yours. It was a movie he would make you watch all the time in middle school and judging by his reaction, he seemed to remember.

You expected him to get mad, his face was hard, expressionless. “Did you bring anything else?” he asked, pushing himself off the wall and making his way over to you.

“No,” you replied, still grasping the cover. He now stood directly in front of you, reaching his hand out to take the cover from your hands as he stared at it.

“I haven’t seen this in years.” You looked up to see Peter with a soft smile on his face as he flipped over the cover, viewing the back. He looked up at you, his eyes meeting yours as a smile found your face.

“Didn’t think you’d still like it.” You mumbled as you realized how close the both of you actually were. There was something in eyes you couldn’t point out, they were softer, almost more vulnerable than any thing you’d seen of him in school. It was as if all his walls were down.

The hand of his that wasn’t holding the case lightly made its way to your arm, grazing it. Your faces were inches apart. His gaze was below your eyes, at your lips as he stepped even closer. “You don’t know what I like.” He whispered.

The two of you leaned in close to each other, forgetting the rules you made, almost in contact until the sound of a door clicking made you jump away from him, landing on the couch.

“Peter! I left some leftovers on the stove,” the sound of May calling out while she entered the room rang through the apartment, as you and Peter straightened yourselves and you stood up. “Just put it on medium in the microwave for a bit and it should get-“she turned around to see her nephew standing by the couch and you next to him, playing with your fingers. “- done.”

There was an awkward silence among the three of you as May stared at the two of you, tilting her head to the side as she tried to grasp what was going on. “May,” Peter spoke up, breaking the silence. “You remember Y/N, right?” He snaked an arm around your shoulder as he pulled you closer to his side.

You gulped as she kept staring at you. “Hey Ma- Mrs. Parker.” You gulped, waving at her.

It was quiet for a bit longer as her eyes darted between the both of you, a warm expression finding her face. “Y/N, I haven’t seen you since,” she said softly, a smile appearing as she shook her head slowly. “I can’t remember.”

You felt almost remorseful as you watched May’s expression shift. She was heartbroken when you and Peter fell out, you remember Ned telling you countless times that she’d scold Peter for letting go of you.

“Yeah, we got in touch recently and,” Peter said he went to grab your hand pulling it up. “This happened.” He lied smoothly as you smiled at her.

You swore you saw her smile falter a bit, “Oh.” Was all she said as she put her keys in her purse and looked at her nephew before her gaze landed back on you again. “Well, I’d love to catch up, Y/N, but I have to get to work.”

“It’s not a problem Mrs. Parker.” You said as she walked to open the front door.

“Dear, you can still call me May.” She laughed before stepping out. “Have fun you two.”

After she shut the front door behind her, you moved your hand out of Peter’s grasp, stepping back from him. “So,” you said to him while he avoided your eyes, making his way to the kitchen. “Does your aunt not like when you bring girls here, Parker?”

He laughed quietly, pulling out a few ingredients out of cabinets. “I don’t really have girls over here.”

An amused smile found your face as you moved to stand opposite the counter in front of him, completely forgetting about the interaction before May entered. “Oh really?”

He looked up to you grinning, before pulling a cook book out of a drawer. “Oh really. Only if they’re very special.” He winked at you before flipping through the pages, making your cheeks stain red.

“What are you doing?” you asked him, flustered at his actions, trying to change the subject.

“No offense to May’s pot pie but,” he began, eyes lighting up as he found the page he was looking for. “I’m really craving a good batch of cookies right now.”

You snickered at his childishness before moving to stand by him. “I’ll do it.”

He snorted without missing a beat, “Sure you will.”

You narrowed your eyebrows, smacking his arm. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“What it’s supposed to mean is,” he tilted his head to look at you. “The last time you tried baking, we almost burnt your kitchen down.”

“That,” you defended. “Was five years ago. I’ve grown since then.”

So the two of you got to work. As you created cookie batter, Peter played some music on his phone. He named himself ‘DJ’ for the night since anytime he tried helping you bake, you’d swat his hand away, muttering an ‘I got this.’

He watched you work, your eyes darting between the pages of the recipe to the ingredients around you. Your eyebrows were furrowed and your lips caught between your teeth as you worked and he’d laugh whenever you’d softly swaying to the music he played.

Why was he so entranced by you? Why did he feel like kissing you when you showed him a movie he’d last seen when he was fourteen? For every minute he spent with you he found himself with memories of things the two of you did when you were younger, when he hadn’t transform into a whole new person.

He could let his walls down around you, you knew the real him. A few weeks ago, you were just some girl he was holding onto for some money, it wasn’t supposed to go beyond that.

But now, he wanted nothing more than that.

“This tastes like ass.” You spit out the cookie onto your plate, gagging at it. You both sat opposite each other at the small dining table, eating the disaster of the desert you tried to make.

Peter chuckled as he took another bite. “Didn’t know you’d know what that tasted like, Y/N.” he teased.

You rolled your eyes at him before staring at him in disbelief as he bit into the cookie again. “You don’t have to pretend to like it Parker, I know it’s terrible. I failed as a chef.” You said, dramatically tossing the cookie back onto your plate and slumping back into your chair in defeat.

“No really,” he said before taking one last bite and dusting his hands out before forcing himself to reaching for another cookie. “It’s good.” He really didn’t like it; it was goopy and burnt, but he didn’t want you feeling worse.

The two of you sat in silence for a while, listening to the soft music he played.

“Why don’t you call me Peter anymore?”

You looked up at him, not expecting the question. “What do you mean?”

He placed the cookie back onto the plate before leaning in front, his arms resting on the table, his eyes looking directly into yours. “You call me Parker, all the time. It used to be Peter, I just wanted to know why.”

You contemplated your words as he looked at you. “I guess,” you spoke slowly. “I started hating you, after eight grade?” He nodded slowly at your words. The two of you never spoke about your falling out after it happened, the two of you never talked at all. “Not anymore of course, I just didn’t feel like calling you by your name. You weren’t exactly my favorite person after that.” You tried laughing a bit to diffuse the tension, but Peter didn’t seem that taken aback. “I mean, were best friends, Parker. And then one day you decided to throw that away without even telling me for, I don’t know, rep?”

A few more moments passed. You looked down at your lap. Should you have said that?

“You can still be happy, Peter.” You whispered, brushing a tear from his cheek. “You don’t need to sink to their level.”

“It wasn’t rep.” He said after a while. You thought he’d be angry, but his tone was soft and quiet, almost broken. “You know what it was like for me, Y/N.” he began. “They’d push me around every day. I’d come home with bruises on my face and I’d have to lie and tell May it was because I fell during gym. I couldn’t leave class a single day without being insulted or getting threatened. And then Ben died,” You looked at him when his voice cracked and you saw his hand shaking while he took a deep breath. “And I just couldn’t take it anymore, Y/N. I couldn’t.” You reached your hand out to his but he pulled his chair back and got up.

“I know I pushed you away, I know I did with Ned too. But, I- I hated my life. I hated waking up, I h-hated living.” You got up and went after him, standing opposite his shaking figure, gently lacing your hand with his, rubbing circles into his knuckles. “But after I did what I did, after I changed, they treated me like a god Y/N, I was finally happy for the first time in so,” You watched his face morph into a broken expression as his watering eyes stared into yours. “So long.”

“You didn’t know what it was like, Y/N.” he said, his hand moving up to clasp around yours on his face as he caught his breath. “I can’t go back to that.”

You found yourself leaning in front, until your forehead was pressed against his. “You don’t have to. But you don’t need to throw away who you really are either.” You realized you may never get the old Peter back, but you could sure as hell help this one.

Peter found himself leaning into your embrace for the second time that evening. His hand moved out of yours an instead encircled you waist, pulling you closer as his lips grazed over yours.

“What about the rules?” you whispered, your hand making its way into his hair.

“Fuck the rules.” He shook his head muttered before pressing his lips against yours. The two you stood pressed against each other for a few moments as his lips molded into yours. He tilted his head to the side, deepening the kiss. You felt yourself slowly walking backwards until your back was pressed against the wall behind you. Your hands tangled themselves in his hair as his hands pulled you flush against him. Years of anger, confusion and longing to go back to what once was poured out of the two of you as you pulled him closer, breaths mixing into a fusion of adoration before the loud ringing of someone's phone sounded.

“You better get that.” You mumbled into his mouth. He simply groaned and shook his head against yours, his lips moving to the corner of your mouth. “It could be Martin.” You said. “Peter.”

He pulled away, his eyes looking deep into yours before he pecked your nose and moved back, untangling himself from you and grabbing his phone, sliding to answer the call. “What do you want, Martin?” he spoke impatiently, eyeing you still against the wall.

“Hey man,” Martin spoke from the phone. “Just thought I’d call to see if everything was,” his voice lowered, “going according to plan? You still do want that cash don’t you?”

Peter looked up at your tangled hair and lightly swollen lips. Your eyebrows furrowed at him as you stepped forward.

You were worth so much more than five hundred bucks.

“Screw the money, Martin.” He said.

“What?” Martin replied, taken aback. “Parker, what’s going on without you?”

“I don’t need your money, I don’t need you.” Peter bit back, his voice laced with annoyance.

“Watch it Parker-” Peter hung up the phone before Martin could finish, tossing it onto the table before sighing.

“What happened?” You asked him, approaching him and grabbing his hand.

Peter smiled at you before pulling you against him, nuzzling his face into your neck, pulling you into an embrace. “I don’t want to fake a relationship with you anymore.” He whispered before lifting his face up and gazing into your eyes.

You gave him a bemused look.

He chuckled at you, pressing his lips to your forehead. “I want to do it for real.” You looked up at him as you heard his voice change. It wasn’t as deep, instead lighter, and more genuine. You grin was wide as he dipped his head back down, connecting his mouth back to yours.

“You know I could’ve done with that five hundred dollars.” You pulled back, grinning at him.

“Shut up.” Was all he said before kissing you again, both your smiles broad.

Things changed a lot during the next week. Even though Martin was pissed at Peter, the rest of the guys didn’t seem to care that much. He still hung out with his friends, and after a while of actually getting to know them, they didn’t seem all that intolerable.

Most of them.

You saw Peter softening up sometimes, he no longer dragged you to the back of classes or spent every minute of the day with the guys. However, there was still a line between the old Peter and new one.

Sometimes the line was less obvious, like when you introduced Peter to MJ. The two were hesitant to talk to each other at first, not knowing how to act or what to say, but after Peter caught a glimpse of the book MJ had with her during lunch, the two of them dove into a heated debate, frustrating MJ and amusing Peter.

You grinned as the two of them bickered, laughing at MJ. She’d probably be much closer to the Peter you knew when you were younger, but you learned to love the Peter you had right now.

“Peter?” he hummed in response for you to go on as you played with his hair. “I invited someone over today, to hang out with us. That okay?”

It was one evening when you decided to test just how much the line could falter.

You and Peter hung out in your apartment, his head resting on your lap as the two of you sat on your couch, watching TV. You saw your phone buzz before deciding to talk to Peter.

“Don’t know,” he replied before grinning at you. “Is she cute?”

You rolled your eyes at him, silently scolding him as the doorbell rang. You lightly pushed him off of you as you went to answer it, him standing up behind you and following you. “It’s not a she, actually.” You grasped the front door handle, turning to face him.

His eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he crossed his arms behind you. “Who is it then?”

You smiled at him before, pulling open the front door. Behind it, Ned stood, playing with his hands. “Hey Peter.” He said quietly, slowly waving at him.

Peter looked between you and Ned, stepping in front of you to be directly in front of the boy. Your heart sunk as Ned flinched at the movement, probably used to being hurt by people like him.

Peter’s face softened as he held his hand out to the boy, smiling instead. Ned’s mouth turned into a broad grin before he excitedly put his hand in, the two delving into their old handshake before Peter pulled him into a hug, both of them laughing. “I missed you buddy.” Peter said before pulling away and pulling you in, Ned’s hands trapping the two of you into a group hug.

Things weren’t going to be the same, but right then and there, you knew you could be okay.

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itoldsunset · 3 years

Text

on writing itsay as a team

[the talk is recorded here, and i’m translating it in chunks and trying to organize by theme. most of the posts won’t be this long.]

so the core writing team for itsay had four people: p’boss, p’kade, p’junior, and goy. and they also worked with p’jokang [i’m just making an assumption that everyone is older than me and calling them p’ unless i know otherwise] who was responsible for the chinese parts of the script. [side note: p’kade said she’s staying on for part 2, p’junior isn’t because he’s a flight attendant and it’s too exhausting, and goy has said on instagram she’s not on for part 2. i don’t know who the other two writers will be?]

some background: p’boss, p’kade, and p’junior all went to university together [where p’kade and p’junior were the same year and p’boss was one year above them] and that’s where they met and they worked together on a lakorn at university [i don’t know if it was theater or film, i can’t understand the words they used lol].

here are some general things they had to say about their writing team, process, and experiences [not necessarily all in order since some of them are from different parts of the talk]:

p’kade said the most intense parts of the writing process lasted about 3-4 months, where they saw each other pretty much everyday. during quarantine, they would be on conference calls together for 8-9 hours a day.

p’junior said there had to be constant communication and updates so no one on the team ever fell behind. if they were going to keep something or get rid of something, it had to be unanimous. they had to move forward together with every step. he said the team process didn’t make them slower, but it brought new and interesting ideas and since each person came with different experiences. a straight man would have one experience, a gay man would have another, a woman would have another, everyone helped bring their own experiences out to the center.

p’kade said p’boss assembled the writing team really well, because between the four of them, they all come with different personalities, experiences, and skills. so whenever they worked together, they would bring different ideas to the table, which was exciting and resulted in something that came out well-balanced, solid, and multidimensional.

p’junior said, “for example, goy is very good at getting the characters’ inner feelings because she’s an actress. she knows that this is how a character would act, and what does a character need to face in order to cry. kade is very good at details that add cuteness to the story. and as for me, i like things that are over the top and ridiculous, and i’ll throw those ideas in without holding back, so other members of the team can either toss them out or bring them down a notch. for example, the scene where teh and tarn kiss, i threw in ideas like what if they use a green colored pencil to color a tree, or a red colored pencil to color a fingernail, make it ridiculous, and then the rest of the team can bring it down, but i like to go big first.”

p’kade said that the members of the core writing team don’t actually screenwrite as their main jobs. p’kade said it’s her first time screenwriting, p’junior is a flight attendant, and goy is primarily an actress. because they didn’t screenwrite as their main jobs, they gave it their all for this project, because they didn’t know when their next chance would be. p’kade said she thought maybe it was a once in a lifetime kind of thing, so she gave it everything: “i wanted myself to feel, and the audience to feel, everything.”

p’junior said, “in terms of tastes, i like to see the audience cry, sorry. because i like to cry when i’m watching tv, i really like it because it gives me a sense of relief. like i feel the pain of the characters, but i always get something back in return. it’s good to smile, but if we don’t see the hardships along the way, it’s not as satisfying. so i wanted to cry with this story--not necessarily even make the audience cry, while we were writing it--but i wanted to cry. i wanted to see this kid [teh] experience things that make him learn, and i wanted to learn with him too. because in the beginning we didn’t know what he was going to encounter. so it became fun--that was the starting point. we all wanted to see how we could make the story fun, that’s why everyone gave it their all. during that time, everyone had this intense energy because p’kade was calling various university faculties about the types of options they had for admissions, whether they had a direct entry option, so that she could present it to p’boss that day. as for me, i was flying [as a flight attendant], and when i had to sleep at the hotel, i also had to wake up to write. there really wasn’t a lot of time for sleeping. i had to call and interview high school students who were getting ready to enter university, and i would make those calls on the skytrain, and they would hear the name of the next station being announced. it was exhausting, but no one wanted to give in.”

p’kade: “we really wanted to win [op: as in overcome the challenge or something like that]. for example, goy during that time was shooting two different lakorns while also writing with us. we would be in a meeting together until 3am, and goy would go to her set at 6am. it was the kind of intense energy where if we didn’t get to do it today, we didn’t know when we’d get to do it again.”

p’junior: “i have to thank the director. because if p’boss had said, it’s okay, go home and sleep and let’s talk in two days, we might not have gotten this far.”

p’kade: “p’boss is someone who has a lot of energy, and when we’re with someone who has that much energy, we gain some of that energy too. p’boss is someone who works very hard, and someone who has a lot of energy, and because it was like that, we ended up becoming that way all together. and it became a working team that i really, really like.”

p’junior: “for the last episode, where we needed the chinese admissions exam, i told jokang we needed it at around 9pm one night, and expected that he would get back to me in the next couple of days. he sent the exam back to me at 5am the next morning, he was up all night writing it. and he explained where the question about xīn could come up, gave advice about how to arrange the questions, told me everything. and i feel like it’s a way of transmitting energy, when you see someone with that intense level of energy, you’re ready to jump in with them too.”

p’kade: “jokang is someone who answers line at all times. no matter what it is, if i’m writing a part in chinese and i want something [p’junior interjects: at 2am], yeah, jokang will send it as a pdf and circle the words and explain them in great detail to me. it made my work easier and it made me understand, as someone who doesn’t work with the chinese language. when i see this [level of dedication], it motivates me to work hard and create something great, because everyone else is working hard too.”

#i told sunset about you #itsay #textpost #i knew goy acted #since i recognize her from hormones #but i'm so surprised it's p'kade's first time screenwriting #and p'junior is a flight attendant #who was working while writing this??#it makes me that much more impressed with itsay #itsay translated #sorry i fucked up the tags and had to repost

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thedinanshiral · 3 years

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My personal DA4 wishlist + thoughts

I’ve been teasing this post for a couple of weeks over at Twitter, i’m the worst! But anyway, since game journalism has decided to confirm, once again, that the next Dragon Age game will be set in Tevinter like that’s breaking news, now’s as good a time as ever to write all this down.

Locations: Tevinter, clearly. It’s been pretty much a given since the end of Trespasser in 2015, with that scene where the Inquisitor stabs a map on a table directly on Tevinter as they promise to go after Solas to stop him. But also concept art and several stories from Tevinter Nights heavily imply Antiva, Nevarra, the Anderfells, and maybe Rivain. For those of you who don’t know your Thedosian Geography 101, that’s basically Northern Thedas. And it makes sense, since so far for three games straight we’ve been first stuck in Ferelden, then the coast of the Free Marches, and later the rest of Southern Thedas. We’ve never been North, only heard of it. So in DA4 i’m sure we will finally be able to visit.

Characters: If we’re going to Tevinter, we must meet Dorian again, maybe meet Maevaris Tilani as well (previously only seen in comics), judging from the latest comics series, i’m hoping for Fenris too. And going by the latest teaser trailer, we might see Varric again. As for characters that so far we have no news of, i’d like to see Cole, the Iron Bull, and if by any chance BioWare feels like blessing us with a Hawke/Fenris reunion i might just die happy. I’d also very much like to see the Inquisitor, but more on that later.

Companions: considering concept art and the latest teaser trailer, plus Tevinter Nights stories and new characters, we have an interesting repertoire of new potential companions. A Tevinter mage, an ancient elf (like a temple guardian) or a dalish elf (like Strife), a Nevarran mortalitasi or spirit, Antivan Crows, Lords of Fortune (new faction, kind of like treasure hunters), Qunari lady, maybe an alchemist or shapeshifter, Grey Wardens (possibly a dwarf), a liberated or escaped slave, a Siccari (Tevinter spies/assassins)..even past agents of the Inquisition could return.

Plot: We know Solas wants to take down the Veil. We know there’s two archdemons left, and Grey Wardens are regaining some spotlight in concept art lately. We might have to fight on multiple fronts simultaneously and be strategic about it. Solas might even unleash a double Blight just to keep us distracted while he focus on his own goal, who knows. But many other things are happenig in the margins and all over the place. The Qunari Antaam is having a crisis with some of its members supposedly going rogue, the order they’re so proud of is breaking up, and the whole of Northern Thedas is facing an imminent threat of invasion. Tevinter is still dealing with remnants of the Venatori and might soon be dealing with a slaves rebellion and/or a political and social reform (Magisters Dorian and Maeveris have been working wirh the Lucerni, a group aiming to restore and redeem Tevinter). The Antivan Crows -the de facto rulers of Antiva - may be dealing with a succession crisis, as their First Talon, a powerful feared and respected but old lady, might not be around for much longer and seems her chosen heir has died before his time. Meanwhile in the Anderfells nobody’s heard anything from the Grey Wardens’ HQ at Weisshaupt since the end of Inquisition, and as told in the novel Last Flight, the sudden reappearance of griffons may have had something to do with that radio silence. So you see, get ready for another +100 hours long game because BW has plenty of stuff to keep us busy with. But in short, DA4 seems will be about primarily searching, finding, and dealing with Solas. Regardless of what you decided at the Exalted Council in Trespasser, the Inquisition or what’s left of it is most likely the group orchestrating that mission. As it was so clearly stated then, they need new people Solas doesn’t know so he can’t foresee their actions, so it’s possible the DA4 protagonist is a new agent or a third party hired to do what the Inner circle can’t due to their familiarity with Solas in the past. But at the same time -and this is assuming we get to find Solas in this game - i definitely think the Inquisitor could easily show up again. No, losing an arm doens’t mean they’ve retired forever, prosthetics do exist in Thedas, a world where you can combine dwarven craftmanship with enchantments, seriously, i don’t ever want to hear “but they lost an arm” ever again as an excuse to write them out. And no, marrying Cullen or joining the Red Jennys is no impediment to join the “Stop Solas” Squad; the end of Trespasser means something, mainly that this is personal. Be it they loved them as lovers, as friends or ended up hating his guts for using and betraying them, the Inquisitor’s relationship with Solas makes this very personal, and so having any other character do that face off would cheapen all of it, all that bittersweet angsty development and expectations of either revenge or closure. That moment should happen between those two. It adds a ton of motivation due to their past historyas well, something a new protagonist would lack entirely. My personal best hope is for a sort of dual protagonist thing, say we play new protagonist for most of the game but a selected missions or scenes where we play as the Inquisitor once again and take over for key and heart-wrenching dialogue options. My second best hope is for the Inquisitor to show up as playable for the moment we catch up with Solas. My third and final best hope is for the inquisitor to be a sort of advisor but more like new protagonist’s boss/employer to whom they report back to and get new missions from. The Inquisitor can be stuck in meetings for the most part of it, i just want to know they’re there, behind a door, super busy but there. A cameo like Hawke’s in Inquisition is the bare miminum i can take, anyhting less than that like a mention in a sidequest description or a footnote in a codex entry would be a total injustice.

Romances: I’m open for pretty much anything, as any good BW fan would be. But i’d like romances to feel more alive in the sense that they don’t abruptly get stuck once you exhaust all related quests and dialogue options. As much as my Adaar liked that spank from the Iron Bull, that it was the only thing they could share after their romance was locked was a bit..meh. I liked Dorian’s tho, because his gave one the option to talk a bit, go for a walk, gossip, and sure, it all happened off-screen, and there were limited possibilities, but it was nice and made their relationship feel a bit more real, like they had more to it than kissing and stuff. It happens in most games, once you secure a romanceable companion suddenly you run out of things to do and share with them, and you get stuck with the same 3 lines of dialogue over and over again. There should be a way of solving that.

Side quests: i’m ok with fetch quests initially as it is a good way of forcing the player to go out and explore huge maps, but i’d also like the fetching to have some meaning other than checking things off a list. I want to explore many ruins, and -can’t believe i’m actually saying this- i want a Fade quest. Wait! I know what you’re thinking but don’t kill me just yet, here’s my idea: what if we could visit the Fade at certain locations to witness memories or meet with spirits and recollect information on Solas, his past, his present? Both to understand him better (keep in mind we’ll most likely get a new protagonist who isn’t familiar with him like we are as players) and try to locate him or predict his next move. It would be i think i great way of having visions of Arlathan in its golden age, maybe seeing some of the other Evanuris, how they interacted with each other and with the elves in their service, what really happened ...i just want that sweet, sweet lore, i need it.

Technical stuff: ok, graphics will be amazing for sure, but i also would really really like: better, more varied and longer hairstyles, PLEASE. Body sliders, it’s damn time we get them. Mounts that actually make a difference! Let staves blades make damage in combat, I’M BEGGING HERE. Combined classes, MAGICAL ROGUES! A homebase we can fix up/build on/redecorate as fully as possible (Skyhold was great and i love it to pieces but why were those walls NEVER repaired????) . More casual outfit options, idk i love to dress up my characters, maybe some transmog? A day/night cycle and please i would love to see Thedas’ second moon, also weather variations depending on the region. Yes, i’m ambitious.

Gameplay: i’d like more AI options for companions, but not quite like in DAO, that was too much and i rarely used it. I’m curious how they’ll do combat this time but i know for sure i don’t want the kind of combat that has me going almost frame by frame pausing at every second, it’s annoying for me. I want large areas like in DAI but with a bit more stuff to see and do although one of my favourite maps is the Hissing Wastes so i won’t complain if we get a literal desert but i’d also like it to have secrets hidden around, make me work to find and solve them, i love exploring, i jump and click on EVERYTHING like i’m still a kid playing Monkey Island. A companion in concept art seems to be holding what looks like some form of rifle, so i’m curious how they’d incorporate that in the game. I know Tevinter has the magics and dwarves have the skill, a firearm is totally within the possibilities in-game without breaking any lore; also super curious what sort of skill trees Crows or Lords of Fortune could have, are they rogues, or warriors, or both??

So far, that’s what i got in my head.Well, most of it anyways, i may have missed something but this post has to end somewhere lol

What’s in your head? Feel free to share! Have you been thinking on how you’ll create your next protagonist? All i can think of is magical rogues and that glowing bow was all the hype i needed.

#Dragon Age #Dragon Age 4 #Tevinter #da4 wishlist #DA4

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iknowyouthinkimbulletproof · 4 years

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If this is the last time- Calum Hood

A/N: first 5sos fic! Calum hood x y/n. Y/n’s gender is female for this fic, it just made it easier to write, my apologies to anyone it might upset, but you can always request. based off of If This Is The Last Time by LANY. Feel free to correct any mistakes! i don’t know if anyone will like this, but i do soooo.

https://open.spotify.com/track/3bsRMvQja4huvPWo1S5ONc

NOT MY GIF

plot: Entries for y/n’s last diary/book.

2077 words. * marks song lyrics

y/n’s diary:

(June 8th 2081) There's nothing better than the support of your family, so imagine having been admitted to the hospital and having every person you’ve grown to know as family waiting for you to leave the hospital. We knew it was coming, that one of us would have to go, but we didn’t know who and when. It’s me and soon. I’m not afraid though. My family’s strong, I know they are. Today he told me I looked beautiful, like he has every day of our life together, but it felt different. It was like a reassurance that no matter what, he meant his vows. Everything felt different today, even the simple touch of his hands while he drove me to the hospital. Especially the way our children said they loved me this morning. I’m ready. There's no point in fighting the cancer, it’s too far along and I'm far too old.

*I know we're gettin' old*

(January 15th 2082) It had begun after the boys last tour, the realization that we were no longer as young as we used to be. Our children started high school and y/s/n starting his own band, following in his father’s footsteps. y/d/n was too, but she had taken the football/soccer approach. They were good at it too. y/s/n having the same beautiful voice as Calum, but preferred the drums. He learned from a young age, he never really stopped admiring his uncle Ash. Which was really Ashton’s fault, almost spoiled him as much as Luke did y/d/n. Luke never got the girl he wanted, so he treated her as if he was one of his own. All the boys did, but Luke was like a second father to her. Which didn’t help with the Cake rumors during touring.

*the lines on our hands have changed, But you still look at me the same*

(September 29th 2082) My life has been amazing, maybe not from the start, but from the moment I laid my eyes on Calum Hood, the past didn’t matter. Nothing matters, nothing but him. Well until my children of course...and then my grandchildren. He stood by me for all of it and I love him for it. He promised forever and that's what we got. There's nothing I could ever do to repay him, or at least in my eyes.

*Hey, mom, guess what? You're really tough.*

(November 15th 2082) This is for my children, I hope you’re reading. I love you, I'll always love you because there’s no way not to. From the moment you were both born to the moment your children were born, I was amazed by the amount of growth possible. I hope one day you’ll have the same joy I did watching your grandchildren being raised by the amazing creatures you created. I hope that one day when you pass, it’ll be surrounded by the ones you love. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to love you, I don't know what I did to deserve you, but I'm very grateful.

*And I know you did all you could. Just to make sure my life was good*

(December 25th 2082) It was worth it, all of it. The pain, the tears, the blood. My life is complete.

*Sorry for the fights and the tone of my voice, Sorry for the nights when I made the wrong choice*

(January 1st 2083) Not a lot of people know, but Calum and i’s relationship was almost torn apart when our children were in high school. It had nothing to do with them of course, but life for Cal had been stressful. He had confessed he felt like he had no purpose now that he thought his career was over. Of course it wasn’t true, but he was like a bull in a china shop. After many nights of hushed fighting, y/s/n had gotten into it. He had convinced his father to start therapy and got him into football/soccer again. From then on, y/d/n got him to become her team's coach and he stayed there until retirement, he said he felt complete after retirement.

*Life is flyin' by and it's hittin' me now. I hope it's not, but*

(January 5th 2083) Sitting here rereading all of my old diaries, has me regretting not taking the course of treatment. I'm gonna miss everyone. That might be hard to believe considering I will no longer be roaming the planet, but everyone means so much to me.

*If this is the last time, please come close*

(January 12th 2083) It's too soon.

*I love you with all my heart, you know. I don't wanna cry, I'm bad at goodbye*

(January 13th 2083) This is my written goodbye for those who I love.

Michael you’ve always been my best friend. I appreciate you taking me in like you knew me forever, like I was there with you and Calum throughout school. I'm sorry I didn't give you another niece to spoil, I know you wanted one you didn’t have to say it. With everything in me, I hope you're the last one of us here, I trust you the most other than Calum to take care of our families. If you are, I hope I don't tear you apart, we’ll all be up here waiting for you.

Luke, where do i start, i owe you 30 bucks. You always said that I would go before Cal, you were right. Don't worry, no hard feelings, none of us actually expected it so soon. But you better be there when my first great-grandchild is born. Make y/d/n name them after me. I'm just kidding, although……

Ashton, thank you for being the big brother I didn't know I needed. Thank you for loving my family like your own and for taking care of Cal when I couldn't. I’m coming to join you right now, see you soon brother.

Kristal, Sierra, and kay-kay…...Bye my bitches, see you soon. I'm just messing with you, you better keep your stubborn asses on this planet a while more. I'll be taking care of ashton for you kay.

For the fans, who have loved my not so small family, there will be a 5sos reunion waiting for you when you pass, but not too soon.

y/d/n and y/s/n stick together or you grounded. I love you, I already said everything I needed to say to you, take care of my grandchildren.

Now Calum, i don’t think i need to write anything for you, we’ve always been honest with each other. Don’t come see me until you’ve met our great-grandchild, stay there for a while until you have enough memories to share with me. Hold our children tight, i know i won’t get to anymore. Just because I'm leaving doesn’t mean you don’t get to spend more time with me, I'll be watching you. When you join me, we’ll get to spend more decades together, and just like the first time you met me, you won’t be able to get away

*If this is the last time,Then let's do the things we always do,Like go to the mall and buy some shoes*

(January 16th 2083) My last day before I'm on bed rest, for the rest of my life in fact. y/d/n was determined to take everyone in the family to the mall. I didn’t get anything of course, but I did suggest a couple of clothing items for my funeral. My funeral, that’s weird to think about. I did get Calum a pair of shoes though. His feet will not walk in with the raggedy old shoes he loves so much.

*I don't wanna cry, I'm bad at goodbye. If this is the last time*

(January 21st 2083) Here I am, on my deathbed, writing what will probably be my last entry. Calum on the other bed in the room, of course he had it pushed next to mine. “We haven’t slept apart in decades, why start now.” I hope he doesn’t take it hard, but I can feel it coming. I can feel the pull. Watching the monitors and seeing the numbers change drastically. We've been saying goodbyes for a while now. As much as it pains me to say this is my final goodbye. Goodbye.

*Hey, dad, what's up? Miss you so much

Yeah, the shade of your hair has changed

But I look up to you the same*

(March 20th 2085) y/n asked us to turn her diary’s into a book series, we had, this is my continuation of the last one. y/s/n has promised to keep publishing them after i’m gone. He said he knew how much it would mean to his mother. Unfortunately this is my last entry as well. I will be joining y/n soon, i knew i wouldn’t make it long without her, i was right. They say i’ll probably die in my sleep sometime this week. I have our children staying with me, waiting till I go. I already said my goodbyes to our grandchildren and my brothers. My mother has been gone for a while, I can't wait to see her again. Mali wished me luck and said she would see us again. I hope it’s not too soon, I want her to be there while y/s/n and y/d/n grieve a second death. y/n said she wasn’t afraid, i understand now. Anyways, I guess this is goodbye.

*Taught me how to fish, taught me how to ride a bike*

(July 25th 2086) Hey guys, it’s y/s/n and y/d/n this time. I hope you enjoyed reading mom, and some of dad's writings. I'm not quite passing yet, but my sister and I thought this last book is not quite done yet. We wanted to add our goodbyes to mom and dad as well. Maybe we shouldn’t write it here, but it feels right. We wanted to say thank you to all the fans who have supported our parents for decades, or even the newer ones. So thank you, you made our parents who they were and in return, made us and our families who they are. We love it thank you. So, goodbye dad. It might be a few decades till we see each other, but we are currently teaching my son how to ride his bike, just like you did me all those years ago, thank you for that. y/d/n is teaching hers to fish, we know it wasn’t mom's idea of fun, but she always did it with us, so now we are doing it with our families.

*Taught me how to love, how to treat a woman right. Life is flyin' by and it's hittin' me now*

(September 6th 2086) y/g/d/n here, i asked mom if i could write something as well, just wanted to thank my grandparents for everything! That's a lot to thank for, I know, but I forgot before they passed. I also wanted to inform them that I finally started college, makes me think of what they would have done if they were here.

*If this is the last time, please come close

I love you with all my heart, you know

I don't wanna cry, I'm bad at goodbye

If this is the last time

Then let's do the things we always do

Like go for a drive or watch the news

I don't wanna cry, I'm bad at goodbye

If this is the last time*

(May 7th 2090) The last entry of the last book of my grandmother’s series. It’s y/g/s/n for your information. The last written update, it’s been years since grandma wrote in this book, but she got what she wanted, uncle Michael truly was the last of the bunch. He’s here waiting for his turn, but he did what was asked of him….and Luke. My first child wasn’t named after grandma, but when we were having our second Michael jumped at the opportunity, he’s holding y/n right now. He said she looks like a young grandma, so i guess it’s fitting. He’s on his way to join our family right now, I'm the last to say goodbye. I know you probably heard it a lot in this book, but thank you guys for everything, we love you.

#calum hood x y/n #calum x reader #calum hood #5sos imagine #sad imagines #fluffy angst?#fic #imagines #sorry not sorry #Lots of Love #-Lizza

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hedwigstalons · 4 years

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High Expectations - Ch20

I’ve been a little quiet for a bit because illness hit me hard (although thankfully not for too long). I’m back though and I bring another chapter of the beast that keeps on growing.

Extra thanks to @willow-salix who had to deal with my post-fog writing going back a few stages and who helped beat this into some sort of coherency.

Earlier parts: One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six, Seven, Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven, Twelve, Thirteen, Fourteen, Fifteen, Sixteen, Seventeen, Eighteen, Nineteen

AO3 chapter link

Chapter Twenty

The mood in the plane was buoyant and the air was charged with testosterone and bravado. The transport flight was filled with Air Force personnel and their destination was Fort Hood, Texas. Scott hummed absently, his fingers drumming out a little beat on his knee, feeling relaxed for the first time in weeks, normally being a passenger on a flight made him agitated as he itched to be in the pilot’s seat but today was different.

The Army was the designated host of this year’s United States inter-service sports tournament and Fort Hood was the location where, for the next few days those selected to represent their respective services would compete in their chosen sports.

The tournament was supposed to be a friendly coming together of the various United States forces plus the various World Security Patrol branches, and for the most part it was friendly although it would be a lie to suggest there wasn’t a certain amount of posturing and goading underneath the surface. For those taking part it was a chance to uphold the honour of their chosen service and score some one-upmanship, for those like Scott who had been selected before it was also a chance to settle old scores.

For Scott it would be a blessed interlude between missions; after his last assignment he was in desperate need of some R&R but with taking leave off the cards this came a close second for allowing him to decompress and see the good side of military life. It would be a chance to indulge in some physical activity that he didn't have to think too hard about, recently his life had been nothing but one exhaustive mission after another. For once he was happy to be free from the burden of command for a while, his primary mission now was to run fast, fight hard and add as many points as possible to the Air Force tally.

His thoughts turned to last year’s competition; he’d done well and never placed lower than fifth in any of his events despite one Seaman Jeffries of the World Navy tripping him in 1500m, an action that by rights should have seen the man disqualified. Unfortunately the rankings were upheld with Jeffries placing second while he had struggled to regain ground and claim fifth. The injustice still rankled and he wondered if he would have to face the nefarious Jeffries again this year.

“Sir,” Scott called across to the Major who had been designated at team captain and was in charge of the Air Force contingent, “do you have a copy of the events list I can take a look at?”

“Sure Tracy, I brought some spares just in case” Major Ellis replied, passing a sheaf of papers across the aisle. “You’re up on the Wednesday afternoon for your track events and then Thursday afternoon for the martial arts. See any familiar names?”

“One or two” Scott replied as he checked out the list of competitors. “The US Army have put Moran in the hurdles again. I’d love to beat him this time and wipe that smug smile off his face. I’ve never met anyone so gloating.”

Having scrutinized the running order and competitors for his own events, no Jeffries, thank God, Scott began idly flicking through the rest of the programme. As he scanned the lists he spotted a familiar name, wanting confirmation of his suspicions he pulled out his phone and sent a message.

How far out of Fort Hood are you?

About 40 minutes came the response. This was quickly followed by How did you find out? Everyone at home promised not to tell you. I wanted it to be a surprise. If it was Alan I’ll kill him.

Competitor list. See you soon.

Scott let out an involuntary chuckle knowing Gordon would be mad at giving himself away and thus depriving himself of the element of surprise in any pranks he had planned.

“What’s tickled your funny bone?” asked Ellis.

“It looks like you’re going to get to meet my kid brother.”

“Really?” Ellis asked curiously, opening up his own copy of the events list. “Is he on the other flight?”

“No, Gordon isn’t Air Force, he joined WASP.”

“You’ve got a brother in WASP? That’s a bit of a polar opposite to the Air Force. I bet that didn’t go down too well at home.” Scott had worked hard to build his own reputation but it was still well known who his father was and the Air Force pedigree he was following. “Is he another sprinter like you?”

“Dad took a little persuading” a frown furrowed his brow at the memory of Gordon’s journey into WASP; ‘a little persuading’ really didn’t do it justice but he wasn’t going to have the family’s dirty laundry aired in public, “but WASP was the natural choice really, Gordon’s a swimmer.”

Major Ellis found the relevant page and looked over the listings. The name Ensign G. Tracy leapt off the page again and again within the WASP entries.

“He’s all over the pool like a rash! Talk about putting all your eggs in one basket. Is he really that good?”

“You evidently don’t follow swimming that much. I should’ve realised WASP would jump at the chance to put him on the squad. It’s not often anyone gets to field an Olympic medallist.” He couldn’t help the smile that split his face at the thought of seeing his brother swim again for the first time since the Games. Gordon had dedicated so many years to his sport and had achieved glittering success that gave Scott a rush of pride at the memories.

In the confined space of the plane their conversation was beginning to attract attention.

“What’s that about an Olympic medallist?”

“Dunno, ask Tracy.”

“Hey, Tracy, who’s got a medal?”

“My brother, Gordon.”

“You’re kidding!”

While Scott’s own unit might have been well versed in his sibling’s success story the competitors were pulled from across the Air Force, most of them complete strangers before boarding the flight. There was a flurry of movement as a couple of people pulled out their phones and plugged the name into a search engine. By now most of the plane was taking an interest. It didn’t take long for someone to dig out one of the news reports; Gordon’s Olympic win had taken place less than two years previously and coverage was easy to find.

“Here, listen to this.”

Team USA continue their race to the top of the medals table with a successful day in the pool. The crowning glory came from Gordon Tracy, a rising star in the swimming world, who not only achieved gold in the 200m butterfly but set a new world record in the process. This achievement is made more remarkable in that Tracy is just 17 years old.

“That’s your brother! And now he is on the WASP team? Heck Tracy, can’t you do something like hide his trunks so the rest of us stand a chance?” one of the Air Force’s own swimmers exclaimed.

“No can do. There is no way I’m sabotaging my own brother and don’t any of you think of trying anything either. If you had ever met Gordon you would know that wouldn’t work anyway, he would probably just do the race butt naked.”

xoxoxox

Gordon gazed listlessly out of the window of his own transport flight, the clouds forming an unbroken blanket below them, the vista bland and uninspiring. After 4 fours in the air he was feeling bored, cramped and fed up. He’d started the flight all keyed up at the thought of competing again but the long hours in the company of strangers was starting to wear thin. For one thing there was too much trash talking for his liking, he’d never gone in for the verbal sparring side of sport but it seemed his companions very much viewed the other services as the enemy at this event. It wasn’t an attitude he had encountered elsewhere in WASP and he hoped the bad mouthing would be constrained to these few days, it also wasn’t behaviour he could join in with in good conscious and so he had stayed quiet and kept himself to himself, trying to get back into competition mode after so long off the elite circuit. A vibration in his pocket startled him and he pulled out his phone.

How far out of Fort Hood are you?

Without thinking he typed About 40 minutes and hit the send button. Only when it was too late did it register who had sent the original message and he realised his mistake. He had wanted to surprise his oldest brother, the one who was hardest to meet up with due to their differing military commitments. He’d been able to tell the wider family about his selection during his period of leave over Alan’s birthday but with Scott away on his mission he’d been able to keep the news secret from his eldest sibling.

How did you find out? Everyone at home promised not to tell you. I wanted it to be a surprise. If it was Alan I’ll kill him.

Competitor list. See you soon.

Well, he supposed Scott would have found out in a few hours anyway and at least this way they would both be looking out for each other. He wasn’t quite sure of the format of the event or how easy it would be to break away and hunt down a member of one of the other services.

xoxoxox

Gordon wasn’t sure what he had been expecting from competition or from Fort Hood but it looked like finding Scott wasn’t going to be easy. Outside of their own events the personnel were able to watch the competition but there was very little free time beyond that. Even if he could get away, finding his brother was going to be like finding a needle in a haystack; the different services were billeted all over the base and by the end of the first day all he knew was that WASP was sharing a dorm block with the Coastguard Service and a mess hall with the US Navy.

Not that he had much time to brood, the swimming was taking place on the first day of the competition proper and after a hurried breakfast Gordon found himself hustled towards the pool.

He was looking forward to the chance of some competitive swimming again. The specialist training on the Merlin had been intensive and the extended time beneath the waves had ignited a passion for marine biology but the cramped space of a submarine had hardly been conducive to physical exercise. This competition would give him the opportunity to indulge in his first passion, he just hoped he was up to the task having been entered into far more events and across a wider range of disciplines that he was used to.

Aside from his trunks lacking the Team USA branding the competition was much like any other Gordon had attended. A fair crowd had filled the viewing gallery but Gordon couldn’t tell if Scott was amongst those in dark blue. Events were called, heats were swum (and usually won) and Tracy was once again a name to be reckoned with in the pool. It felt good to be cleaving through the water again. Despite not being in peak condition for swimming he was still in fine physical form over all and the muscle memory from all those races past carried him along to victory time and again. The main difference to his usual style of competition was the lack of medal ceremony at the end and at the conclusion of his last race Gordon was able to wend his weary way back to the changing rooms where he flopped down on a bench.

Pressing his shoulders against the cold tiles, eyes closed and head tipped back, the last of his energy was spent. It had been a long time since he’d pushed himself to those lengths in the water and normally his race card was rather more sparse, one elite athlete among many, each responsible for their own specialisms. The problem was, despite the high physical standards demanded by the military, elite athletes were in short supply and his pool times had placed him as primary candidate across more events than he was really comfortable taking on but he hadn’t felt able to say no to his superiors this early in his WASP career.

He concentrated on his breathing, listening to the hum and chatter of the other competitors around him, a cluster of WASPs gloating about their healthy position in the league table were his nearest companions. He knew he ought to be getting dry, knew he ought to be digging out the tracksuit he’d been issued for the event, but his limbs felt leaden. He wanted to be collapsed on his bunk but that involved moving and right now moving felt an impossible task.

“Gordon, eat something.”

He sensed a dimming of the light levels through his eyelids as a figure stepped between him and the harsh lights of the changing room. The voice was commanding but his eyes stayed firmly shut and his body refused to obey.

The figure in front of him was causing quite a stir but then that was typical of Scott. He tended to exude an attitude as though he owned a place and this evidently wasn’t going down well with the WASPs around him who bristled with resentment at the young figure in Air Force blue invading their section of the changing rooms. There were muttered jibes, reminiscent of those from the flight over, but the intruder wasn’t giving the WASP delegation the rise they so clearly desired. Having failed in their goading one of his team mates decided to square up to the man they evidently viewed as the opposition.

“And who the hell are you to order us around, flyboy?”

Scott’s eyes glittered at the challenge, a warning look that Gordon would have recognised from his own childhood had he been fully cognizant of the situation, Scott was not in any mood to be pushed.

“That’s Captain to you” there was a pause as he took in the insignia worn by the other man, neither were in traditional uniform but the competition sports kit still had a place for rank slides; after all, the military thrived on hierarchy “Chief Petty Officer, although I accept you may not be familiar with the rank structures of the other services”

Scott turned his attention back to his brother, ignoring the WASP who was now brisling after being firmly put in his place. He was well aware of the animosity being directed towards him but his focus was his sibling, not some jumped up sardine with a chip on his shoulder. He’d been concerned at the amount of events Gordon had pulled, and now, seeing his brother in the aftermath, he knew that concern had been justified. The figure in front of him was breathing a little too shallowly for comfort and hadn’t moved from the moment Scott had spied him from across the changing room. It had been a long time since he’d seen his brother swim himself to this level of stupor, years of competing had made Gordon pretty well attuned to his bodily needs, but evidently today he had neglected his post-race routine.

Gordon had gotten as far as taking off his swim cap but no further, water dripped down his torso from the flattened hair that was still slick from the showers. Even accounting for his time under the waves his skin was far paler than Scott was used to seeing. He’d come down with the intention of congratulating his brother on his success in the water but now his primary concern had turned to Gordon’s basic wellbeing.

Scott knew he had to get his blood sugars back up again. He grabbed his brother’s kit bag and rooted around in the end pocket. He allowed himself a small smile of triumph as his fingers closed around the packet of glucose tablets it appeared his brother still had the sense to carry. He extracted two tablets from the tube and, crouching down in front of his brother, placed them in Gordon’s palm before closing the lax fingers over them.

“Gords, you still with me? You need to get these into you.”

He paused while Gordon’s body processed the order, then let out a little breath of relief as the arm jerked up and Gordon began to suck on the tablets.

He hadn’t seen his brother crash this bad since he was about twelve. An early promotion to senior squad had seen the pre-teen eager to please his new coach while trying not to show anything that could be construed as weakness by his new and much older team mates and so the kid had forgone his post-race refuel. The result then had been Gordon turning a grim shade of grey and falling off the medal podium in a dead faint.

With the glucose tablets administered Scott turned his attention back to Gordon’s kit bag and pulled out a celery crunch bar, a firm favourite for the swimmer. He opened it and placed it in Gordon’s now empty hand. This was evidently an imposition too far for the WASP already disgruntled at being put in his place by the young captain.

“With all due respect Sir” there was a distinct sneer behind the formality “there’s no eating allowed in the changing rooms.”

If Scott’s eyes had glittered before, now they blazed with anger and contempt. Rising from his crouch in front of Gordon, he drew himself up to his full height and positively loomed over the belligerent WASP.

“With all due respect I would have thought you would rather your team mate got his blood sugars up, or does your first aid training not cover hypoglycaemia?” He took a step towards the WASP, encroaching into the man’s personal space in a clear display of dominance. “Not that you seem to be acting as a team right now. Would half of you even be here if it wasn’t for the relay events, or maybe you tried to enter him for all four legs of that at well?”

With the glucose hitting his blood stream Gordon became more aware of the increasing commotion around him. Voices that had once been jubilant now had a dangerous and angry edge and…yes...most of the anger seemed to be coming from Scott.

Something tripped blearily in his brain; what on Earth was Scott doing here and why did he suddenly feel so cold? Amber eyes cracked open and he forced his head open off the wall. The movement was clocked by Scott who was back in front of him in an instant.

“Hey Fish, you back with me?” All traces of anger had gone as he turned his attention back to his Gordon, the Air Force Captain replaced by the brother of old; the caregiver with the ready supply of band aids, ice packs and gentle admonishment as he presented yet another injury for inspection.

“Yeah, I’m...I’m good.” He looked down in confusion at the crunch bar in his hand, not entirely sure how it had got there, but took a bite anyway. “Guess I should have known better than to skip refuel.”

“Yeah, you should”

Yup, that was the Scott he knew from Kansas. Gordon felt like he was 9 years old again, being told off for being an idiot in the same ‘I told you so’ tone that had made it quite clear that of course jumping off the shed roof or using the frayed rope swing had been a bad idea.

“Yeah, thanks for that” A snort, an eye roll, and a re-emergence of the same attitude common to his past nine year old self.

“You’re okay now though, right? You’ll finish your bar and get dressed? Glucose tabs are back in the end pocket if you need more.”

“I’m fine, honest.” Okay, the slight whine was a little too much like a kid but he was tired and there was something about Scott’s familiar care that had him regressing 10 years. He forced protesting muscles to obey and hauled his back off the wall, rolling his shoulders to try and loosen the muscles that were rapidly seizing up. He tried to suppress a groan at the exertion, he wasn’t quite ready to try standing until after the crunch bar was finished but he also knew Scott would not be pacified until he saw some sort of response. The skeptical look he was given showed that Scott still wasn’t entirely convinced. Mustering up his remaining energy he returned the look with a grin which seemed to appease the elder Tracy.

“Hmm”, Scott didn't sound like he believed him but couldn't argue it, “well, get dry and get your kit on. You did good out there. I’ll be on the track tomorrow afternoon; I’ll see you there.” Without waiting for an answer Scott turned and exited the changing rooms.

The departure of the Air Force officer was followed with an outburst of grumbling from the WASP delegation.

“Asshole. Who the hell does he think he is, ordering us around?”

Gordon still hadn’t found his footing among the other swimmers, or the wider WASP delegation. He might be the highest ranking of those at the pool but he was also by far the youngest and with the shortest amount of service under his belt by a country mile. Rank structures overall seemed to be treated differently during the competition and these particular team mates seemed to have little regard for authority. He was conscious that a wrong move now could make life distinctly unpleasant for him, he might never see these men again after the competition was over but he still had to get through several more days in their company. He decided to play it for what it was; Scott being an irritating older brother.

“That was Scott. I think he got the whole older brother thing hard wired in at birth.”

“You’re related to that?” There was a contemptuous sneer aimed at Scott’s retreating form that set Gordon’s hackles raising but he knew sniping back would be an error.

“Yup. Of course, I got blessed with the good looks while he got the height.” He flashed a grin, trying to diffuse the tensions.

“Is he always such a jerk?” a Seaman sat to his right piped up, finding his voice now the imposing Captain was no longer practically standing on his toes.

Gordon shrugged; evidently the tensions were still there. “Only when he needs to be. I should’a thought to grab the glucose tabs myself after that many races. It’s been a while since I hit the pool competitively.”

There was a slight shuffling from the other swimmers, signs of guilt at not looking out for the young Ensign that had carried the team. Scott’s words about the rest of them only being there to make up the numbers for the relay, while not wholly accurate, weren’t far off the truth. They were all back in their dry kit while Gordon was still in his trunks, his skin still pale from the exertion even if his eyes had regained some brightness.

“Anyway,” he scruffed at his hair before drying off the rest of his body ready for dressing, “I need some real food after that and then I need to find out where the track events are being held.”

A snort. “Well we’ll be watching the shooting tomorrow. You can join us, or are you really going to do what big brother tells you?”

There was a challenge in the tone but Gordon was feeling more alive again and less tolerant of their needling. “I’m not going because he told me to, I’m going because he’s my brother and I want to. In my family we support each other and Scott, well, he’s done a lot for me.”

Decision made and allegiances stated he swung his kit bag over his shoulder and headed out to find some food.

#High Expectations #thunderbirds #thunderbirds fanfiction #Scott Tracy #Gordon Tracy #Military brothers #Family comes first #swimming

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delfinodreams · 3 years

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OKAY i said i would make a post about my thoughts on paper mario a while ago and im finally writing it out

ill put it under a break because its probably gonna be long-ish

update: yea this bitch is LONG

okay so overall i really really enjoyed it!! it was really solid for the first entry in the series and i could definitely see the inspiration that ttyd later took from it. one thing that i didnt know about was partners not having HP, which threw me for a little bit of a loop. partners as a whole in this game don't play as active of a role as i wouldve expected because they have so little lines but using them in battle is still very fun! another small thing but i also hadn't expected mario to be completely silent, but it later grew on me!

i'm also gonna list my experiences and opinions on each chapter so here we go!!

chapter 1 - pretty alright for an introductory chapter! i didnt find anything especially notable, apart from getting 2 partners in one chapter. navigating the koopa bros. fortress was fun, and i loved the battle at the end!! their theme is SUCH a banger i had to sit back and listen to it for a bit when the fight actually started ehe

chapter 2 - not quite a fan of this one imo? i liked the first part through the mountain, but the trek though dry dry desert kinda took it out of me. BUT the addition of my favourite partner made up for it! parakarry my beloved <3 also the cutscene where dry dry ruins rise up??? that shit was SPECTACULAR. i absolutely loved how it turned dark when it first came up, i wish it stayed like that for more than just until you entered the ruins. the boss itself wasn't too exciting for me, probably because there wasnt much of a story?? i dont know how to describe it. actually its like that for quite a few of these bosses, but its the first entry for this series, so i wont fault it too much.

chapter 3 - this might be my FAVOURITE chapter- the suspense buildup throughout the entire chapter was AMAZING holy moly!!! first through the forever forest when you have bootler ask for you, and then wandering the mansion itself. i TOTALLY thought that boos were gonna be actual enemies when i saw them floating around. sneaking around tubba blubba's castle was so so fun to do, and i legitimately panicked when you ran into him in the hall and also when he wakes up and chases you back to the windmill. i didnt actually think the heart itself was the boss, just a miniboss, so i freaked out when i left the windmill and was immediately thrown into a battle with tubba blubba. i cannot express just how much i enjoyed this chapter, seriously!!

chapter 4 - coming back to toad town with the music change threw me for a bit; i wasnt expecting action to pop up so soon! figuring out that you could actually go into the toybox was such a "wait, what??" moment for me, but like, in a positive way. it was really cool to navigate this chapter and the lantern ghost encounter genuinely creeped me out at first because it was COMPLETELY dark. the fight against general guy is also a BANGER i could listen to it all day

chapter 5 - man i LOVE the whale. just a big guy willing to take u across the ocean :^) i really appreciated how you weren't stranded on the island too, like how you were on keelhaul key in ttyd. the ravens are also funky little guys, love them too. again, the lava piranha didnt really have any substance to it BUT it was a nice fight nonetheless! when it popped up again i was shocked but i made it through!! also fuck kolorado he doesnt deserve his wife

chapter 6 - this one's formatting is really neat- one central area with lots of branching paths, which i hadnt seen in my past pm experiences! i loved the quest leading up to the big beanstalk, plus the environment was so pretty!! the little part with the sun tower popped out to me, i'm not sure why though. maybe it was the music, it was so different from the flower fields theme. at first i had actually expected to go up to the clouds earlier, maybe like midway through the chapter. i thought that would be the "dungeon" of this part, so i was a little bit let down when i realized that the fields were the majority. however, the bit of the clouds we do see is SO good i LOVE the atmosphere!! huff n puff was actually relatively easy, using parakarry and lakilester for their all-around attacks. the guitars were a nice touch for his theme as well!

chapter 7 - oh dude i LOVED this chapter. i didnt know what i was expecting when i first went into the pipe in the sewers, whether it would put me into a village immediately or if i would have to make it through some screens before. needless to say, i was relieved when it popped me out into shiver city. the whole place felt "warm" which was really nice!! i was comparing it to ttyd's chapter 7 and fahr outpost which i didn't really vibe with, so it was a nice change! the whole murder plot was also unexpected but i enjoyed the whole "whodunnit" mystery! omg as im typing this i realize just how many aspects of this chapter i love this is gonna be long,, the entire snowy atmosphere is just so PRETTY and starborn valley felt so solitary to the rest of the land, like its own little bubble. i also had no idea that ninjis were in this game so when i saw one at merlon's i was like HUH?? anyways the way up the mountain to the crystal palace kept me on my toes; i thought that was the dungeon at first! the small bit where you see madam merlar and she tells you the story of the palace really got to me i have no idea why. the music and mysticality of it all was just SO good. dont even get me started on the crystal palace itself HOLY MOLY. the whole reflection bit was SO SO clever and the moment you realize its NOt actually a mirror?? fucking magnificent. this has to be my favourite dungeon in the whole game because it has such a NEAT gimmick!! it also has my favourite mario enemies, duplighosts! FUCK the crystal king though. he stunlocked me with his freezing move because i could not get the hang of blocking it. my partners really carried me for that battle; thank god for quick change

chapter 8 - THIS CHAPTER DELIVERED. the buildup for the entire game leading to this point. OUTSTANDING. i had to sit back and admire star haven because its so pretty- did i mention i love the water graphics in this game?? it has a pixelly look but it works SO WELL. going to the ship to take you to bowser's castle really felt like a "this is it" moment. the entirety of bowser's castle was So Good, it kept me on my toes the entire time!! slowly advancing as the music got more intense REALLY pumped me up. tracks that start off with only a couple instruments and eventually add more as you progress is one way to make me go BONKERS. the one bit where you make your way outside on the bridge and the music dials down and then you re-enter on the other side to it SLAMMING you in the face- that was Great. and then the complete silence as you get outside peach's castle HOLY SHIT. and then you actually enter the palace and the music is SO EERIE and youre like OH SHIT THIS IS REALLY IT. seriously, the buildup for this entire castle is done SO magnificently. i hadn't expected to fight bowser twice, i guess it was the game's way of letting u level up One Last Time before u got to the big bad. that being said, i wasn't too worried on getting a game over since i was fucking stacked on items. but that's besides the point- the fight itself got my heart POUNDING. the effects for the star rod and the star's powers were really nice to see in action, and the little section with peach and twink was so cool! i was expecting a little interlude where you would get your stats maxed out because thats how its like in every pm game, but it was still moving :)) bowser's final battle theme fucking SLAPS. the guitar especially sounds AMAZING. you really see him as a threat here and its so badass. his healing move fucked me over multiple times- i probably ended up having to deal with double his base HP over the course of the fight.

after the fight was over and you got to see peach's castle float down with the soft music in the background, it really hit me that its done, its over. again, the effects in this game are so pretty and theyre utilized SO well for the n64. visiting toad town one last time with all the npcs was a really nice touch- for some reason i really loved being able to interact with vanna t. (chuck quizmo's toad assistant) she's ADORABLE and i will probably end up drawing her sometime :)) the credits were also something that i really enjoyed- i LOVE the ongoing theme of parades at the end. seeing everything and everyone in the game condensed into a short 8 minutes really got me, i cant remember but im pretty sure i was smiling the whole time! and a small sidenote- TOADS WITH GLOWING SPOTS ON THEIR HEAD HELLO?????? I WANNA DRAW THAT SO BAD.

the ending screen with peach and mario looking at the fireworks made me really soft and i teared up a little because i was finally finished. the addition of pop diva's solo in the track was also so touching, it was my favourite sidequest in the game so hearing it again brought up Emotions :')

one thing i wasnt sure of was if there was a post-game mode and my completionist heart was disappointed a little when i found out i couldn't advance from the end screen and was forced to reset. although not many games from this era had post-game content so i cant dock too many points for that.

the paper mario series has a fond place in my heart, and finally being able to play the game that started it all really was a special experience. it really cemented my love for the original formula and i could see many places where ttyd took inspiration from. this game really is fun, and i would highly recommend playing it yourself if you have the means!

#i just finished typing this out #i did not mean for it to get this long omg #i just have Many Thoughts #and you guys get to deal with them #i just checked and this is nearly 2K WORDS HELLO??????#paper mario #paper mario 64 #dreamy convos

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the-sara-voe · 3 years

Text

Chapter 8: The Profile

Warning: Description of bodily trauma and dead bodies

Masterlist

Their conference room is smaller than any of them expected, but it provides enough space for ideas to hover about. Emily stood close to the whiteboard, analyzing Spencer’s geo-profile.

“Alright, each of the victim’s dumpsites was close to where each one was picked up, and are within a couple of blocks of each other”, Prentiss started, pouring herself another cup of coffee. “So he has a preferred dumping ground, he may work or live close by”.

“He also has to have enough knowledge of the area to snatch girls when they’re isolated, so a local”, Rossi responded, observing the photo-ridding corkboard.

“Did you get anything from the staff at that bar”?

David fiddles with his pen as he chews on his words, “Not much. The bar only has cameras outside the entrance. There was a prostitute that said she saw the second victim taking a smoke outside before she left. The bar manager said a bartender quit on them though”.

“I don’t suppose that raised any red flags”?

He shakes his head while Prentiss sipped her coffee, Hotchner and Simmons entering the room.

“How did the cognitive interview go”? Rossi asked.

“Good, apparently Daniella got into a small altercation with a guy at Larkin’ before she left”, Matt said, leaning on the back of a chair, “He got ‘handsy’ and she rejected him, and then he left”.

“Brielle gave us a description”, Hotch told, handing a sketch to Emily and Rossi. The man has a square jaw, is white, with smoldering eyes and a natural smirk. Using David Rossi’s words, he looks like a douchebag.

Hotchner glances at the drawing with a glum expression, “Brielle told us that Daniella had a friendship bracelet on the night she was taken. It wasn’t on her body when she was found”, he said.

With a sympathetic look and a bit of her lip, Emily asks, “First day back harder than you thought”?

Aaron nods his head in response, not saying much else.

In an attempt to change the subject, Matt says, “that might actually be beneficial. Sena thought it could be a sadist, and if he is taking trophies that confirms it”.

“You’re damn right it’s a Sadist”, Byun announces as she darts into the room, Reid lagging behind her.

Sena drops the medical examiner reports on the table, flipping through the pages. “Both victims were heavily restrained, so much so that there was leather from the gag used in their stomachs. So they were alive when they were tortured. All of the stab wounds are focused in the abdomen, and if you compare Marckus to Cortez, there is an increase in certainty and violence. He is getting way more confident”.

“Well increased violence from Marckus to Cortez is compatible with the guy who Daniella rejected”, voiced Rossi.

“A sadist who doesn’t like to be challenged by women”, Byun poses.

This prompts Spencer to add, “Oh and both victims essentially lost their entire blood volume and were killed with a corkscrew. In addition to them being redressed, the M.E. found diluted traces of sodium hypochlorite”.

Sena rolls her eyes and gestures to Reid saying, “Spencer, just say bleach. Anyway, we think this guy is forensically sophisticated enough to hide his DNA but confident enough that he thinks we are not going to find him because he is still using the shirts from that church”.

“Which I cannot find where they store them”, Luke muses, walking in with a file an inch thick, “Turns out the church the Home Sweet Home project is run by has so many volunteers that when they get a new order of shirts, people just volunteer to store them. So we have a long, handwritten check-in list of people who go to pick up the shirts when they arrive at the church”.

Hotch extends a hand for Luke’s file, flipping through the entries, saying, “First and last names, phone numbers, and quantity of shirts picked up. Okay, send these to Selemani. Maybe she can trace the numbers and connect them to home addresses. Then we can cross-reference those addresses with the dump and abduction sites”.

“Uh, excuse me, you’re not Unit Chief yet”, Emily scoffed, “but Luke, do what Hotch said”.

Luke cracks a smile as he takes the file and goes to find a scanner, Sena following closely with her cellphone to her ear. Matt and Aaron soon follow suit, the both of them having not eaten since early that morning. Prentiss jots down a preliminary profile. However, Rossi peers over at Reid, who is examining the ME reports.

“Kid, did you say the wounds were from a corkscrew”? Rossi asked, pouring himself another cup of coffee.

Spencer responds, “Yeah, it’s strange huh”? Rossi offers him a cup, but Reid politely declines.

“The bar that Daniella Cortez was last seen at, one of their bartenders just quit. That’s one hell of a coincidence don’t ya’ think”?

Reid’s eyes widen slightly as he nods, “We should talk to that bartender”.

As Reid stands from his seat, the detective of the department rushes in. His face is red and worn from exhaustion. In a matter-of-fact tone, he says, “There was another body found in the opposite direction in an abandoned lot. In a sleeping bag and Home Sweet Home shirt”.

Before Rossi and Spencer can respond, Prentiss rises from her seat. She turns to both of them, as if telling them to find everyone and gather in the bullpen of the station. Emily glides past the table to the detective when Spencer and Rossi leave.

With calm and certainty, Emily states, “We need to deliver the profile”.

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maryellencarter · 4 years

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So for about ten days now I've been playing around with the budgeting app Mint (along with a Google Sheets yearly budget template and a lot of manual work with a calculator, a calendar, and a succession of blank Google Docs because that's just the kind of person I am), and so obviously I have some Thoughts.

* I picked Mint because it's the budgeting app all the financial reviewers talk about, because it's run by Intuit who also own TurboTax so I knew their security and interface would be good, and because it does not come with built-in shaming over any of your ~unnecessary~ purchases.

* Mint is a free app which makes its money by offering you sponsored ads for financial products it thinks you might like, and getting paid by the advertisers when you accept one of the ads. The most intrusive location for these ads is on your dashboard, feed, whatever you want to call it, where the ad tile is required to be the third tile down and cannot be shuffled to the bottom or turned off.

* (There is also a desktop browser version, Mint.com. I have poked it very slightly but couldn't get it to do anything useful. More on that later. I don't remember noticing how the ads are arranged there.)

* The app's general design is very sleek and intuitive, what I'd expect from the parent company of QuickBooks and TurboTax. Other than the intrusive ad tile, it lets you rearrange everything however you want.

* Mint is designed around importing transactions from your bank account for you to do budgetary stuff at, so obviously security is really important, which gives Intuit an edge up on the competition because I'm already used to trusting them with my tax returns. It only seems to sync new transactions during banking hours, which for someone like me who does most of their shopping on Sunday is kind of frustrating. It also won't let you edit or recategorize a transaction till it's finished "processing" a day or two down the line. I don't know if these pitfalls are common to all budget apps but it would probably make sense if they are.

* One thing Mint does that's incredibly handy for me is it lets you put all your recurring bills in one place and even sync them with your phone calendar. I actually had to turn off the phone calendar sync because it was alerting me constantly on the day before payday when I couldn't do anything about the bill that was due on payday, but if you can find the setting to change the alert frequency it might be useful. And having a nice chronological list of what the fuck is due when, is extremely helpful to my brain, because previously I was trying to remember everything in my head and I kept losing bills.

* Going down my tiles as I have them sorted in the app, I don't have much to say about that list of transactions itself, except that you can recategorize them and split them into different categories -- which is handy if the rent included $105 late fees which you don't want befuckening your future averages, or if you bought groceries and also a barbecue lighter at Walmart, to take two recent examples.

* You cannot, unfortunately, rename or edit categories. On desktop only, you can supposedly add categories, but you cannot then use those categories in any of Mint's other functions, which really defeats the purpose. And their ideas of what categories you might need are pretty... idiosyncratic, not to say WASPy, so e.g. I'm currently categorizing Patreon income under "Reimbursement" because the other options were things like "Investment Income" and "Returned Purchase". And transfers to my savings account can either be "Credit Card Payment" or "Transfer for Cash Spending".

* (I suppose I could put my savings under "Investment: Deposit" or something similarly grandiose, but that seems like... a lot for the 31 cents rounded up from getting a pizza at Little Caesars.)

* Anyways. So then, after the obligatory ad tile, comes a nice colorful pie chart of my spending for the month, which I can open up and tab through to look at all the categories. I saw one finance blogger saying you should use the Miscellaneous category for some things rather than getting too granular, but I like seeing the little individual entries for my haircut and my cloth mask and my pharmacy copay. (That last one's going to be a more substantial pie slice now that I can actually afford to start taking most of my meds again. Turns out my prescription for diabetic test strips expired, though, so I have to get ahold of my doctor and get a new one sent over, and I'm looking skeptically at the copays. :P I've been ignoring my diabetes since January, it can wait a little longer till I'm financially caught up from COVID.)

* I can see list-style breakdowns by category and merchant, too. This is one of the few places in the mobile app that my income shows up, other than the actual paycheck transactions. The desktop version has some more places to budget projected income, but the handling is clunky as hell.

* Next up is the tile where I've been spending a lot of my time, Budgets. This is your basic "envelope method" where you create, say, a budget for haircuts and another one for groceries. Each budget has to be for one of Mint's pre-created categories, and when you have a spending transaction in that category, it puts the expense against that Budget. The desktop version has you also creating a line item for expected income in Budgets, and then becoming stroppy when you attempt to adjust parts in the wrong order, so I prefer the app which simply tells you e.g. that you have spent $900 of an allocated $1000 with an airy unconcern for whether the $1000 has arrived in your bank account yet.

* My single biggest frustration with Mint is that you cannot create Budgets based on user-created categories, nor can you delete, rename, or even collapse categories in the list. So if I go to create a new Budget for, say, "Housewares" to account for the $1 barbecue lighter I finally bought (I have large hands and a tall jar candle that has burned down farther than I can reach, okay, it was a necessity), then I'm stuck scrolling all the way up and down past "Investment: Capital Gains" and "Kids: Child Support" before finally settling on "Home Supplies" because it doesn't really seem like a "Home Furnishings".

* After Budgets comes Accounts, which just shows me my current net worth across all my accounts. I actually unlinked my savings account because it was confusing the hell out of me to see a 31-cent transfer out of checking paired with the same 31-cent transfer into savings, so this doesn't show me anything I can't get through my bank app, but if I had current credit card debt or non-retirement investment accounts it might be more useful.

* (I have not linked my 401(k) to Mint. I haven't even figured out how to get into my 401(k), either before or after it transferred to a different handler a couple months back. I feel like those are problems for a later time than "okay how much groceries can I buy and still pay the rent".)

* On the desktop version of Mint, you can also put things like your car in under your net worth as Property. I tried that, found that I both did not believe their Kelly Blue Book valuation at all (it didn't have any option to take into account "was totaled two years ago and looks it but still mostly runs") and that I find it extremely stressful to have non-liquid property listed as part of my net worth. Interesting to know. You learn all sorts of shit about yourself when you try to manage money.

* Next there's a tile that attempts to break down my "cash flow" by month. It doesn't seem to have noticed the Paypal transfers on which I was largely subsisting for the three months it was able to pull from my bank account, even though they show up fine in Transactions, so it's deeply confused about whether my cash flow is Healthy or Unhealthy. For now, with my acquisition of a second paycheck for August, it seems to have settled on Healthy. I might turn that tile off though. It doesn't really... offer much, I guess?

* I have turned off the tile that shows me my free credit score. That's a problem for a much later me. Right now I have more urgent problems, like catching up on my deferred car insurance and my deferred cell phone bill and my deferred healthcare deductions.

* You also can't turn off the tile for the Mint "Life Blog" or the one asking you to rate the app, but at least they sit at the bottom of the app as you scroll down.

* The desktop version also has an entire segment not found in the app, for "Goals", where you can supposedly put in your outstanding debts and figure out payment schedules for them. It sounds really good in principle, but I found that section of the site unworkably glitchy, on both laptop and iPad; I couldn't even get past the screen where you try to first enter one of your debts, as it required me to choose answers from two dropdowns neither of which would actually do anything. I was able to get an estimate from the "saving for a rainy day" goal, anyway, by putting in the amount of a debt and telling it I'd like to save up that much money in a year, but that's nothing I couldn't have done with a calculator and a bit of mental effort.

* Jumping back up to the top of the app, one other thing that does intermittently drive me bananas about the app is, when you put in a bill you get a dropdown where you select how often it should recur, but then it... doesn't recur. You have to manually put in the next occurrence. It's still a handy list of upcoming bills, but I actually had to resort to my phone calendar (which properly handles recurring events) to get a good visual on future months' bills.

* And because there is nowhere to put in your projected income and get a nice projection of "On X date you will have $XX in your bank account", or even better a daily graph of your expected cash flow so that you can see "yeah don't put that $300 in savings you'll need it for rent in two weeks", I've been reduced to, as mentioned above, manual daily projections through the end of the year using my phone calculator, phone calendar, Google Docs, and eventually my damn iPad drawing app (came with a Bluetooth stylus I never got working) because I couldn't find any physical graph paper.

* So. Um. Summary. I guess it's a good app? It's very sleek, it has nice charts and graphs and a good interface. But it thinks you can do a lot more with it than you can actually do. Its main uses for me are probably going to boil down to "stop forgetting bills" (the rolling list format works a lot better for my brain than the phone calendar format, even if I do have to re-enter data every time I mark a bill paid) and "finally figure out how much I spend on food really".

#budget #mint app #app reviews

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ficsxreaderr · 4 years

Text

Snow in New York

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader. MCU, post-Endgame.

Summary: You met Bucky during your favorite time of the year, and it brought both of you the best years of your lives.

A/N: This is my entry for @marvelfulxbabes ‘s challenge! I entered the challenge with my og account @stateoflovinged. I really enjoyed writing this, I ALWAYS enjoy Christmas, so I hope this turned out well. Also, I thought this was going to be a two-part fic but I guess it’s nicer to read it all at once. Thanks to @livyourextralife for reading this before I posted it and being such a great friend!

Reblogging and feeback are welcome and appreciated!

Masterlist

The view from this bedroom is astounding, the sun setting behind the trees, the sky turning into a shade between orange and pink, the soft wind hitting your body covered with sweatpants and his t-shirt and hoodie. Your hair tied in a bun, your face make-up clean, your skin soft after a hot shower, and your feet warm inside your slippers. You take in the landscape and then walk inside to see your boyfriend walk out of the bathroom, with his skin still slightly wet and his body only covered by a towel that falls right below his waist. He dries his hair carelessly, and sits on the edge of the bed to put on some clothes. He groans lowly as he finishes pulling up his sweatpants, and you frown as you walk to the bed.

“What is it, Buck?” You sit, resting on the pillow and waiting for an answer.

“It’s nothing, doll, it’s just that my back’s killing me today and I can barely move.” Of course it is, the metal arm has many perks, the main one being him having his full capacities back, and as light as he claims it is, it’s sometimes tiring to carry around something that technically, doesn’t belong to his body.

“Oh,” You reply, kneeling on the bed right behind him, and caressing his shoulders and neck in the most delicate way. “Do you think I can help?” You murmur against his ear, earning a chuckle from him.

“You always can, baby.”

You keep caressing his shoulders, but then add some gentle squeezes on his tight muscles. His neck is very stiff, too, and you even find a couple of knots that you massage for a while until they are gone. Right below his shoulders, where his body meets the vibranium, his muscles are completely tense, and there are even more knots, it’s almost unbelievable that he can even move his arm.

“Babe, why didn’t you tell me before? You must be in so much pain.” You stop for a moment and caress his hair, making him sigh deeply.

“Well, it wasn’t that bad, it was bearable until today.” He shrugs, look back at you with a small, almost apologetic smile.

“You should tell me every time, okay?” You kiss his cheek and then he reaches up to press his lips against yours, humming as he understands.

“I will.” He nods. After some moments of working your way through those knots, they start loosening up and you feel his whole body relax, and you smile at that, kissing the base of his neck slowly, until you reach his jawline.

“Is this why you started massaging my back?” He chuckles, unable to move away.

“Of course not, this is just a perk.” You speak against his ear, feeling his muscles jolt below your hands. You keep massaging every single part of his back as you place soft kisses over it, occasionally going back to his neck and his cheeks, teasing him with gentle bites at his earlobe. A shiver runs down his spine and you instantly feel it against your skin, and you both chuckle.

“I’m just trying to make you feel better.”

“You are, sweetheart.” He slowly turns around, with much more relaxed features, and stares at you for a moment.

“What?” You reach up to caress his cheek with the back of your hand.

“I love you.” You heart still flutters every time he says that, just like the very first time, because that’s exactly the way he says it.

“Buck, I love you too.” Kissing him, he smiles against your lips, chuckling. You stop and stare at him, to watch his eyes much more rested, and his shoulders slightly dropped, compared to when he first sat on the bed. “Do you want to get some rest now?” You place a kiss to his jawline.

“Yeah, I haven’t been sleeping well, and I have a feeling I might tonight.” You nod and both of you make yourselves comfortable on the bed, he uses two pillows, because he doesn’t like to keep you up with his snoring, and he likes the side opposite to the window, because sunlight wakes him up too early. You lie there, staring at each other for a moment.

“You know, I still think it’s crazy that we met.” You mention.

“Yeah, I think so too, after all this time I didn’t think it was possible to…find happiness.”

Snow is probably one of your favorite things in life, and winter, especially Christmas, is your favorite time of the year. Your family always gets together for the holidays and it’s just the best feeling ever, you get to visit your parents, help out with decorations right after Thanksgiving, which you usually miss for one reason or another, and it definitely is you favorite time to take photographs, even if some of them don’t make it to the online magazines your work for. You stay at your parents’ for this month, because you barely see them through the year, they always find a way of convincing you to stay for so long, and you don’t fight it much because, well, they are your parents.

So going out for walks, ready to take a picture of anything slightly aesthetic that you find is kind of your tradition this month. The day is wonderful, it’s snowing but not enough to keep you inside, so you make your way through the streets of New York, open to find anything worth keeping in a picture. You get to Central Park and see it a bit crowded, so you try to find a spot that’s a bit empty, not to photograph people against their will. Finally, there’s a perfect spot, where you can stand in a good position and take the ideal shot of the park, a beautiful shot of Central Park covered in snow. You sigh deeply, taking it all in and smile, setting your camera. You lift it at eye level, ready to press the button, but someone walks by and stops to stare at his phone right in front of your camera. “Oh, man.” You whisper, not as lowly as you expected, and he turns around, a bit confused about what he just heard. You put your camera down and he takes a few steps closer.

“I’m sorry, did I step into your shot?” He speaks and you look up, even more confused than he is.

“Oh, hi, yeah, you kind of did, but it’s fine, don’t worry.” You chuckle, hopefully not that awkwardly, because you just realized how cute he is. Damn it, his eyes are some shade of blue you’ve never seen before.

“I’m really sorry, my phone rang and…sometimes I get confused even picking up.” He chuckles now, and you unconsciously frown at what he said. “But I’ll…I’ll let you take your picture now.” He nods as he takes a step backwards.

“Wait!” You speak almost impulsively. “I—I actually think you’d be a good addition to the frame…if you don’t mind…” Your voice is almost a wreck by the end of the sentence.

“Would I?” He asks, getting closer again.

“Well, yeah, I mean you’re tall and…stout.” You smile. “And you’ve got a nice profile, if you allow me to say.” He instantly blushes, looking down at his feet with his hands deep into his jacket pockets. He chuckles and shakes his head in disbelief. “But if you’re not comfortable, I understand.” You add, making him look up at you.

“No, no, it’s not that, I’m just…it’s been a while since I’ve received a compliment, even if it was a bit…subtle.”

“Oh, I see.” You nod.

“If you don’t mind my asking, what are those shots for?” He points at your camera, revealing his glove-covered hand.

“I’m, um, I’m a photographer for online magazines but this one is for a…Christmas collection that I put together every year…just for…fun.” You press your lips in a thin line, insecure of what he might think of you wanting to take a picture from a stranger.

“That sounds…fun, actually.” You both laugh as if your minds agreed to, and you finally see a broad smile, and how the corners of his eyes crinkle. He’s really attractive, who is he?

“It is.” You nod.

“Well, I’ll gladly appear in your picture if you think it’ll look good, I’m not exactly sure.”

“It will, trust me.” He smiles yet again.

“Okay, where should I stand?” You give him directions, you take him to the exact spot you want him and tell him to look to his right, so in the picture it will seem as if he’s looking at the ice-rink. He really could be a model, but you’re pretty sure that’s not where you’ve seen him.

“Alright, you’re perfect there, don’t move.” You instruct him and go back to your position so you can finally take the picture, or two, but you won’t say. “Done!” You exclaim and he walks towards you, with his hands in his pockets.

“Can I see it?”

“Of course you can.” You show him the picture and he smiles. “Do you like it?” You ask and both of you look at each other.

“I do, you’re…very talented, you made me look decent.” He shrugs, joking, making you chuckle.

“Come on, you’re…almost a natural.”

“Hey, do you think I can have at least a digital copy of that?” He asks a bit hesitant.

“Well, yes! I mean, it’s your picture after all, is a text alright?”

“Yeah, it’s fine. Though you might need my number for that.” Smooth enough. You smile and bite you lower lip, making him smile back. You nod and almost immediately take your phone out of your pocket and hand it to him after it’s unlocked. He chuckles and takes it slowly, typing his number and then hands it back.

“I’ll send it as soon as I can, I still want to take some shots for today.”

“I’ll be waiting.” He nods.

“Hey, um…I didn’t get your name…” You frown. Bucky’s heart races at those words, he didn’t think of that until he decided to give you his number, and it just stresses him out, because he’s been laying low for a while, his life has changed so much since that thing with Steve happened, and it’s been in constant change since World War II, so it’s not common for him anymore to be giving out his name to people like everyone else does. A very little detail, a very simple sentence, two very easy words to say are just too much for the former Winter Soldier still.

“I’m…I’m…Bucky.” He blinks rapidly, as if he’s hesitating, and offers you his hand and you shake it.

“Bucky? I’ve…never heard that before…is it a…”

“Nickname, yeah.” He smiles. “I’m Bucky Barnes.” You freeze for a moment, now that name you’ve heard before, of course you’ve heard it and of course his face looked familiar to you. He figured he might as well give you his last name, before you found out on your own and got mad at him after you’ve just met.

“Oh!” You exclaim. “I…I knew you were familiar, you’re…you’re…” Bucky’s heart stops right there, when he thinks you’re going to remember he’s the deadliest assassin of the century, that he’s one of the most dangerous men on Earth, and Hydra’s pawn for everything they’ve done. But he’s suddenly relieved, and quite shocked when he hears you complete that sentence, “An Avenger, wow, I can’t believe I’m meeting an actual hero!” You smile widely. He’s speechless, literally he has no idea what to say, you see him as a hero, as someone who’s saved people, not the opposite.

“You know, I’ve read about you and Steve Rogers at the museum, and then read and heard a lot about each member of the Avengers…you guys brought half the universe back and saved it…” You shake your head, not quite believing your eyes.

“Well, you could say that…” He speaks a bit nervously, with a small grin. “I don’t like to be called a hero, though, it’s a big…name.”

“I bet it is.” You nod. “Well, I just have to say thank you.” He shrugs. “And maybe hope you’ll accept grabbing a cup of coffee with me.” He widens his eyes in surprise, unable to stop smiling, as his eyes glisten the more he hears you speak. “We don’t have to talk about the hero thing, of course, you just…seem like a nice guy.”

“I accept.” He nods and chuckles. “But…how about you tell me your name now?”

“Right!” You chuckle. “I’m Y/N, Y/N Y/LN since I already know your last name.”

You keep your camera inside its bag and Bucky joins you as you walk to find a coffee shop.

“Hey, so, do you live here in New York or are you just visiting?” He asks, with a much more confident tone in his voice.

“I live in Boston and come this whole month to spend it with my parents…and take some pictures.” You pause. “But I was born here and I wouldn’t trade it for the world, I had to go to Boston for work, you know, and figured it was easier to live there.”

“I bet it was.” He chuckles. “I love New York, despite…many things that have happened.”

“It just feels like home, right?” You look around with a small smile, not realizing he’s only looking at you. You look up at him and he’s not even tried looking away, he smiles at you for the millionth time today, and it feels warmer every time. “So can you tell me about yourself? I mean…I don’t want to ask something that I shouldn’t.”

“No, it’s okay.” He clears his throat. “I…grew up in Brooklyn, which I figure you already know. And, um, well, I’m a veteran, theoretically…and a senior citizen.” He jokes with the last words, looking at your eyes and making you laugh a lot.

“Wow, I do feel a lot of pressure now, I’ve got reasons to treat you right.” He laughs now, happy that you got his joke, and his heart flutters for the first time in a really long time. He forgot how it feels to talk to a girl and make her laugh, to walk around with someone that apparently doesn’t expect anything from him but a casual conversation, to look a girl right into her eyes and see that she’s enjoying herself around him.

“You better.” He speaks, letting that lovely Brooklyn accent out for a second, which for some reason, he didn’t have before. It’s so cute, to be honest.

“Come on, tell me more, I want to know.” You nudge him and he looks down at you with a new glow in his eyes, smirking.

“Alright, um…I…am living in the newly built compound with Sam, and other…colleagues, including Steve, though it’s weird now because…” He stops for a moment and swallows and clears his throat.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me, whatever it is, don’t feel pushed.”

“No, I…I actually feel like talking about it. I haven’t been able to but right now it…felt right.”

“Oh,” You’re quite startled by what he said as if he trusts you out of nowhere, or at least that’s what you think. “Okay, why is it weird now?” You spot a coffee shop right across the street and stop since the red light is on.

The conversation you and Bucky held that day will forever be your favorite, no matter how much time passes, how many hours you spend with him, how much your love grows and how many times you say you love each other, because that day it was settled that he was your soul mate, the love of your life.

For the past two years, you’ve kept your tradition of making photo collections during Christmas, except now, they include pictures of you and Bucky, and of course, with the rest of the team, and you have pictures of the compound covered in snow, of the whole team decorating inside, of you and Bucky ice-skating and constantly falling down; your life has been a dream since that day a stranger stepped into your shot, and you couldn’t feel luckier.

“Sam! Could you bring that box closer, please?” You speak up from the ladder you’re standing on, pointing at the box filled with the little star-shaped ornaments that are your personal favorites from the whole tree.

“Coming, sweetheart!” Sam teases as he picks up the box and holds it up for you.

“Careful, Sam, I’m never that far away.” Bucky speaks as he walks into the lounge back with a cup of coffee.

“Oh, I know that, especially in this weather you’re close to her.” Bucky shakes his head and chuckles.

“Babe, I brought you some coffee, come down here and take a break.” Bucky says to you and you slowly get down from the ladder.

“Thanks, Buck.” You take the cup and reach up to kiss his cheek. “But I don’t need a break, I love decorating.” You shrug as you sit on the couch, folding your legs so you can place the mug on your knee. “However if Sam finally finished putting the lights on the tree, that would be very helpful.” You joke. Bucky sits beside you, draping his arm around you so you can get closer, and he kisses your hair.

“Well, I finished my set of lights.” Rhodie says as he sits on the other couch. “Sam’s like a kid being told to order his room.”

“I got the longest set of lights! It’s not my fault.” He shrugs as he continues with his task, barely untangling them.

“Sam, all the sets are the same, stop whining and work.” You tease him and roll your eyes, making Bucky laugh. Out of everything you and Bucky have shared and every moment you spend together, making him laugh is probably your favorite thing, besides, obviously, sharing a bed with him.

“What about Bucky? He’s not set anything on the tree.” Sam rests his hands on his hips in a very dramatic tantrum.

“I’ve set all the lights outside with Clint, Sam, that’s much harder than hanging a plastic shiny star. And Clint just comes here to visit, you live here.” You laugh and look at him, kissing him.

“The coffee is great, babe, thanks.” You kiss him again.

“How come Bucky’s the only one with a girl? I mean, he doesn’t even go out that much.” Sam says as he finally starts putting on the lights.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Bucky asks, faking offense. “I got plenty of girls back in the day, and I can still get them now.”

“Them?” You quirk up an eyebrow and stare at him. “How come?”

“Well, you’ve seen that, when we go out, a couple of girls are…staring.” He shrugs.

“They don’t just stare, you even talk to them sometimes!” You nudge him.

“Yeah! To tell them I have a girlfriend!” He exclaims back, pulling you closer to him.

“You better tell them or I’ll have you take down all the decorations, including the tree, at the end of the year.”

“It’s a deal.” He kisses your cheek.

It has been so great the way the team accepted you moving into the compound, there’s plenty of room for everyone, and they make you feel at home every day, and even more now that you’re in charge of making Christmas what it should be, the best time of the year. Everyone got presents for everyone else last year and they said they really enjoyed sharing as a family, which is what they are despite all the…loss.

Night has fallen and so has the temperature, it is very cold outside so you’ve had F.R.I.D.A.Y shut all the windows and turn on the heating. You’re in the mood of sharing a cup of hot chocolate with Bucky but he’s nowhere to be seen. The kitchen is an option so you walk in to find Sam way ahead of you.

“Well, look at you all Christmassy drinking hot chocolate.” You tease him, quirking up an eyebrow, making him look at you with a smirk.

“The weather demands it, this is purely a survival instinct.” Both of you chuckle.

“Hey, have you seen Buck?”

“You wanna get all warmed up with him, huh?” He says with a hint of amusement.

“Yeah, with hot chocolate.” You cross your arms.

“I think he’s outside.”

“Outside? But it’s freezing!”

“You do remember the guy’s always warm like a bird, right? He puts on a sweatshirt and he can survive snow.” You laugh at that, especially at the bird reference considering Sam’s suit.

“Alright, Birdman, I’ll go check on him.”

The sight of Bucky standing still staring at the lake with his hands in his pockets reminds you of something he told you a while ago, something that was really painful for him to watch and that he rarely opens up about. Oh, I know what this is about. With slow steps so he doesn’t hear you, you approach him, until you’re standing beside him.

“Hey.” You speak really low. After a second or two, he turns to see you and gives you a very small smile. “It’s cold out here.”

“It is.” He chuckles. “I was just…remembering.” He turns to see the lake again and you stare at him as his face gives him away.

“I thought so.” You say after a moment. “I don’t know what I would’ve done in his place, it’s hard to tell.”

“I wouldn’t have gone, you know.” He says louder, looking at you again. The answer is a shock to you, it is not what you expected him to say. You frown, mostly in compassion and let him continue. “We went to what we went through, it is what it is.” He shrugs. “It was…bad, but I…I was starting to live with it and past it.” He shakes his head. “We had each other again, Y/N.” You reach up and caress his cheek slowly, tracing your thumb along his stubble. “I thought at least that would last longer this time…”

“I know, Buck.” You say after you’ve swallowed to avoid the sob that threatened to bubble past your lips. “I know that’s what you wanted.” You nod slowly. He takes your hand gently, his warmth contrasting with your cold skin, and takes it to his lips to kiss your palm, earning a small smile from you. “I’m sorry about everything, but there’s so much you can remember about him to feel better, isn’t there?” He scoffs and smiles, looking down at his feet.

“I guess you’re right.” He looks up again. “It’s the first time I’ve said all that out loud…and I am so glad you were the one to hear it.” He cups your face and brings you closer to press his lips to your forehead for a moment. The wind doesn’t feel that cold anymore, and his heart doesn’t feel so lonely since the day he met you, and much less right in this moment. The birds chirping as they seek shelter in the trees remind you of Sam’s comment earlier, and you chuckle, looking away.

“What is it?” He asks, dropping his hands to your shoulders and stroking them to warm you.

“Um…Sam said today that you are always as warm as bird and that’s why you don’t mind being out in the cold.” He laughs, forcing his eyes to narrow and his crinkles deepen, giving you a view worth admiring.

“I won’t even deny that.” He shakes his head and pulls you closer to him, making you bury your face in his chest, and you press your lips to it, even if it’s covered by his sweatshirt and t shirt. He strokes your back and then kisses your hair, sighing deeply.

“Y/N…you make me want to be a better man. And I will be…with time.”

“Bucky, you are a good man, you are the man I need and the one I want in my life.”

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tbehartoo · 5 years

Text

Fading Ink

A late entry for Lukanette September. This was due last week. Not beta’d but spellcheck didn’t have anything bad to say about it so??? Please enjoy.

Luka hadn’t expected the phone call from Maria or her request, but he got why she’d asked him to do it. He’d seen a local tattoo parlor that specialized in this kind of thing on his news feed a couple of days before, so he called for an appointment and was surprised when the owner herself offered to move some things around to accommodate his need. He was standing in front of the shop looking at the “Closed” sign and wondering if he’d gotten the time for the appointment wrong when a woman ran up to the door.

“Hey there,” she said as she moved the large paper bag in her hand to her opposite arm so that she could rummage in her purse. “Are you Luka? I’m Marinette. I think we spoke on the phone yesterday?”

Luka nodded as he watched her juggling coffee cup, paper bag and her purse. “Uh, can I help you with something?”

“Yes, thank you!” the coffee cup and paper bag were thrust into his open hands so that she had both of hers available to finally find her keys. “I keep meaning to put them on a hook or something so I can find them easier, but I tend to forget that until I’m standing in front of a customer being very unprofessional and making us even later than I was already running.”

She said all of this while unlocking the security grate and rolling it up, opening the front door and flipping on the lights. Luka chuckled and followed her into the shop. He watched as she locked the door behind him a little wary.

“I hope you don’t mind,” she said nodding at the door and ushered him past the front desk into the office. “Since it’s just the two of us here I don’t want anyone wandering in, not until I have Ivan at the front desk in any case.” She chuckled, “Something about seeing a highly tattooed rugby player wearing a death metal shirt just sort of discourages wanderers.”

He snickered at her statement but realized he needed to answer her question, “Uh, yeah. It’s fine.” Luka started looking around at the art on display on the walls and all over the office. “Wow, this is amazing,” he said pointing to a particularly intricate design at the front of a look book as he took a seat at the round table in the middle of the room.

The woman smiled and nodded. “You wouldn’t believe how much I had to practice that one before Tikki said I could put it out on display.”

“Who’s Tikki?” he asked, confused when the woman put the coffee cup and a napkin in front of him.

“My mentor and the former owner of the Lucky Ladybug,” she answered as she picked up a tea kettle and disappeared from the room.

Luka took the time she was gone to look through the design book. She was back after just a moment and had switched the kettle on.

“My staff prefers a variety of warm drinks,” she said as she waved toward a small area stocked with sugar, creamer, hot cocoa packets, stir sticks, and various brands of tea. “Not too many of us drink coffee so I brought that for you, but if you want sugar or cream you’ll have to add it yourself.” She got out her own mug and nabbed two tea packets before sitting at the desk in the corner. “Please feel free to ask if there’s something you might need. Or if you’d prefer tea, that’s also available.”

“What?” it took less than a second for his brain to realize what she’d said. “Oh, thanks.” He took the cup over to the counter and began mixing things to suit his taste. The lever on the kettle switched off while he was on his way back. By the time he sat down, Marinette had poured out her hot water and pulled out her sketchbook.

“As our special guest you get the first choice of the pastries,” she said as she pointed toward the plate she’d filled with a variety of morning breads.

“Oh that’s not necessary,” he said with a small smile.

“Oh, but it is,” she said as she continued to get out pencils and erasers and wake up the computer. “When I told maman and papa that I had a client dropping by my shop in the morning, it became very necessary for you to have a plethora to choose from. Please, grab one.” She looked at him archly. “You don’t want to break mama’s heart, do you? Make sure you pick a couple to take home with you, too.”

“This seems a little excessive,” he said as he put a warm cheese danish and a flaky croissant on the napkin in front of him.

Marinette chuckled. “It is a lot excessive, but Papa lives to feed people and Maman does what she can to help support our mission. So tell me Mr. Couffaine-”

“Luka, please.”

“Okay,” she smiled warmly at him. “So tell me Luka, what are you hoping to achieve here? Do you want to just modify or completely disguise the design? Did you want to connect it with others you have? Or do you want to have it covered with color that basically matches your own skin tones?”

“I hadn’t thought about it too much,” Luka said unable to look up at the artist. “Maria asked me to get rid of it because she didn’t want to have anything connecting me to her, but- I didn’t really think of the how.”

Marinette reached out and put a comforting hand on his forearm.

“That sounds like a really painful conversation to have.” He nodded and she continued, “Tell me Luka what does that tat mean to you?”

Luka took a deep breath. “Maria was my first real, my first serious relationship,” he confessed. “We were both young and we both knew that there was a chance that it wouldn’t last, but-” he broke off. He looked up into her eyes begging her to understand.

“But you wanted it work?” she asked quietly. "And you wanted something that would last as long as your love for her?"

He nodded.

“Do you regret getting that ink?”

He shook his head. “I don’t regret any of my ink, maybe some of my placement decisions,” he smiled as he tapped the side of his neck that had a small snake nestled there, “but not one drop of ink.” Took a deep breath and released it. “I learned a lot from Maria. I learned how nice it is to have a hand to hold, a heart beat to fall asleep to that isn’t your own, what love is and even what it isn’t. There was a lot I learned about the importance of actually communicating with each other openly and honestly. I learned what betrayal and heartbreak feel like. And I learned that I could survive all of that, even when I didn’t think I could.” He paused, “I don’t want to forget that even if she wants,” he took a deep steadying breath, “wants to forget me.”

“Those are all admirable lessons, no wonder you’d want to preserve them,” Marinette said quietly. “I’d suggest that we find something that has the same meaning for you, while erasing the design that stands for her.” She patted his arm and then sat back and picked up a pencil. “I’m very sure that we can help you through this.”

Luka took another deep breath and a small smile found a way to his lips. “Thank you.”

They spent the rest of the morning discussing possible images that had special meanings to Luka, his favorite designs among the various look books they had, and other choices that he would have to make. He showed her some of his other tattoos that were in the same area as Maria’s design, and Marinette took the time to note them and their placement on his arm and shoulder. The last thing that Marinette did before Luka had to leave was to trace the design to have the actual size and outlines to know how to design the covering tattoo as well as taking a couple of pictures to get a good idea of the colors involved.

They set up another morning meeting for him to go over potential designs and Luka hurried home clutching a few of the remaining pastries with a lighter heart then he’d had since he answered Maria’s call.

After the second meeting, they spent the next two weeks texting back and forth as Marinette asked clarification about symbols and pictures Luka had chosen as meaningful and how he might want them combined. She also asked about his surrounding tattoos and their backstories. Luka asked about how she got into her profession and why her shop was so adamant about removing tattoos that people wanted erased. Once they had exhausted the topic of skin art they moved on to Luka’s music (he sent her a few links so she could listen) and Marinette’s role as permanent taste tester for her parent’s baking experiments (she promised him an opportunity to have the full Tom et Sabine guinea pig experience once he was back in town). They discovered that they had quite a few places around town that they both enjoyed going to and Luka was surprised that they hadn’t run into each other before this. Marinette listened as Luka told her everything about his time with Maria and she reciprocated with stories of her past partners. They talked about their heartbreaks and laughed over silly moments and clever memes.

Luka was surprised how quickly it felt like he’d met up with his best friend after a long separation, instead of someone who was practically a stranger. There were people he’d known for years that he didn’t feel as comfortable to be himself around as he did with Marinette.

By the end of the second week, she sent three possible designs for him to choose from. Luka was floored by what he saw. Each design was so different from the other, and yet he could tell that Maria’s tattoo would be well and truly erased, while the meaning would not. When he was still trying to choose over a week later, Marinette invited Luka to another early morning appointment to see if she could help him eliminate at least one of the designs.

Luka showed up carrying coffee for himself and tea for Marinette as well as a bag with breakfast sandwiches from his favorite bagelry. Marinette was frantically searching her bag for keys and Luka couldn’t help but laugh.

“I told you I’d pick up breakfast so you’d have time to beat me here,” he said when she whirled to look at him. He noticed the pink growing in her cheeks, but didn’t remark on it. “What happened?”

Marinette yawned before replying, “We had a group walk in about an hour before closing wanting to get matching tattoos. They were suspiciously sober and totally sincere.” She looked up with what looked like tears in the corners of her eyes. “One of their rugby teammates was in the last stages of an aggressive cancer. He’d been worried about his little girl growing up and not knowing who he was and what was important to him.” She stopped for a moment to collect herself. “One of them recorded the conversation and he’d listed several things,” she smiled weakly up at Luka as she pulled out keys and turned back to the security gate while continuing her story. “Later they realized his list contained as many items as there were teammates. The four who had visited him sent the video out to the rest of their team and asked for suggestions to put the guy’s fears to rest.” She got choked up as she flipped on lights and locked the door behind them. “They all decided to get a tattoo together. We came up with a very simple design: a rugby ball, one word from the list, and an infinity sign under it.” She grabbed a tissue to dab at her eyes, but continued to usher Luka into the office. “We only had two people that could do the actual inking.” She chuckled, “Ivan was so busy trying to get everyone prepped that I think he might actually skip his next practice because he can’t stand to see that ball again so soon.” Luka offered a smile as she continued to talk. “We just had to disinfect and reset because they’d already discussed placement and everything. They got all the guys from the team down here, too- including their coaches. They wanted to go by his house this morning to show off their idea.” She’d just switched in the computer when she looked at the table to see that Luka had set up a place for her to eat, she joined him at the table. “While they were getting their tats they talked about the guy. They talked about what he’d brought to their team, and what he’d taught them, and how much they were going to miss him.” She took a sip of her tea and sighed. “It was pretty emotional and it lasted long past closing time. But they were good guys. They ordered in pizza and we even found some cardstock so they made him a card to take by today, too.”

“It sounds exhausting,” Luka replied as he unwrapped his sandwich.

“It was.” Marinette reached for her sandwich, but decided to put her arms on the table and rest on them instead.

“We could’ve rescheduled,” Luka said. “I’m not an unreasonable ogre about this.”

“You’ve been a peach,” Marinette said through another yawn. “But I know that Maria has hounded you about not getting that taken care of yet.”

“You do?” Luka was surprised. He hadn’t mentioned it to anyone.

“Did you forget I follow your band on Insta?” she muttered. “There was some girl going off about you not doing the simplest thing she asked and then telling you you couldn’t have her design on your body for like-” she stopped to think “-twenty lines in all caps. I don’t know her personally, but I was pretty sure that was her.” She made herself more comfortable on her pillow of arms. “You deserve better treatment than that from someone you love.”

“Oh, you saw that?” Luka had blocked her and removed the comment as soon as he saw it pop up.

“Well, seeing as how she did it at least four times in thirty minutes that I know of,” she smiled through closed eyes at him, “Yeah. I saw it. It made me want to do two conflicting things.”

“Which were?”

“Redo the design bigger and better, but add neon and blacklight inks so that it shows up under any, and all, lighting conditions.”

Luka was sniggering at the suggestion. “And the other?”

“Put such a kickass design over her ink that she can’t ever claim to have that connection to you again.”

She said it with such warmth that Luka couldn’t help feeling a spark of happiness at her words. For the first time he was actually eager to have Maria’s tattoo paved over.

“I think we should go with that second idea,” he replied.

She sighed dramatically. “Well, you are the client so you do get to make that choice. But if you want to go the first route, I have some really excellent neons I’ve been dying to try out.”

They both chuckled, but were interrupted by the computer signaling it had finally booted up.

Marinette raised her head from the table, but hadn’t opened her eyes when Luka put a hand on her shoulder.

“You said you’d put the designs in an animation to show me what they’d actually look like on my arm, right?”

“Yeah.”

“Would it be okay for me to watch it while you grab a quick cat nap?”

“It’s a little more complicated than that,” Marinette said as she got up. “But I’ll show you how to switch between the three designs and you can take your time looking.” She sat at the computer and pulled up a couple of programs, then motioned for Luka to come over to the desk.

“This is the file where your designs are stored. You just have to open it up and click on either the LC 1, LC 2, or LC5 to get the designs I showed you. This program,” she pointed to the one showing what looked like a generic 3D model of a human with a photograph of his arm superimposed on it in the display, “knows how to take the design from the file and put it in the right place and orientation. We can manipulate it later to get it just right, but you can turn the model and the arm to get a better idea of how it will look to you and to the people around you.”

She quickly demonstrated by clicking on LC 1 and the first design was up and covering Maria’s tattoo.

“That’s pretty cool,” Luka remarked watching intently.

“This layer isn’t opaque, so you actually get a pretty good idea of what this will look like in real life. I know you were worried about how bright that green was but if you look at it now-”

“It’s exactly the shade I was describing to you,” Luka said with a little awe.

“See? I told you I knew what I was doing.”

“I never doubted for a minute.”

“You doubted the green for two days,” she reminded him.

“Well that’s not exactly a minute,” he said in his defense.

“True.” She couldn’t help another yawn. “I’m going to go drink my tea and eat the lovely breakfast someone so thoughtfully brought to see if I can wake up some. You can join me or play with this-”

The words had barely left her lips and Luka was reaching out to grab the mouse to click on the next design.

“Well that answers that question,” she said with a smile and exchanged places with him.

She showed him how to turn the arm and the model then sat at the table with her tea. She tried not to stare while he clicked and hummed at the different designs. But she stole a glance as often as she could.

She thought over what her job meant to people as she ate. Those guys last night were memorializing a fallen comrade. Luka was removing the last piece of a hurtful relationship. So many others had come to redeem painful mistakes from their past, or embed lost children forever into their hearts. Countless women had received freedom from abusive spouses or pimps through her work, those ones were always done for free. Good times, heartbreaks, family and friends lost and often ones found were all etched into the people that came through her doors. It was a privilege to be a part of so many people’s stories.

She became aware that Luka had stopped clicking and stood up to see what he’d chosen.

“I want this one,” he said as she drew nearer.

Marinette stopped in her tracks. “But that’s not even- I mean it’s not a final- How did you even get to that?”

Luka pointed to the file where his designs were stored. “I wanted to see what these LCS designs were.” He grinned at her. “Imagine my delight when I saw that you’d done sleeves to incorporate my new design with my old ink, too.”

“I was just doodling that stuff.” Marinette was still recovering from seeing his delight at the warm up practices she did. “It was like doing random drawing prompts or those cooking shows where you get five ingredients and have to make a meal. It wasn’t like a serious design choice.”

“Why not? This one is perfect! I has my music, my family, some of my other art interests and even a really rad snake that looks like it should be on my next record album. This is so my life tied together in a beautiful picture” He looked up at her. “This is totally what I’d want to see every day when I wake up. Please, tell me we can do it.”

Marinette nodded. “It will take several visits just for the line work,” she pointed out.

“I can make time for that,” he said with a grin.

“Only the part that covers the old tat will be at the low price I told you. Some of this will be a lot more expensive.”

“Okay. That’s fine by me but I only want you to do it. No one else from the shop.”

“But my apprentices can do the fill for so much cheaper-” she began.

“No, Marinette. I only want Maria’s tattoo covered by ink from the hands that took the time to find out who I am and what I need to be happy. I want it not only covered but I want the area around it filled with the music and love that you bring out of me.” He reached up and took her hand. “We can do that, can’t we?”

She stared deeply into his eyes and found nothing but love and admiration in them.

“When do you want to start?” she asked.

He broke into a grin. “How about now?”

“We have to wait for Ivan to get here, and I have to look at my schedule, but I think I can work you in.”

Luka let out a whoop and sprang up to be pulled into a tight embrace. He was leaning down to give her a kiss when she put a finger across his lips, halting him.

“No dating till after it’s finished,” she said. “Nothing good ever comes from kissing your clients.”

He laughed and pulled her in for another hug.

“Okay, but when it’s done I’m taking you out. Okay?”

She nodded. “Okay.” She took a step back from his arms and waved at the table where their half finished breakfast waited. “I can zap these for a minute and we can finish our food while we wait.”

In a couple of minutes they were sitting at the table and Marinette looked at Luka.

“I still say the expense is going to be pretty high for a struggling musician.”

Luka smirked at her. “M I regularly tour with Jagged Stone. I can afford to have you on retainer for the rest of our lives. I’m only struggling because I’m fronting my own band, with Jagged’s backing, and I’m not used to being the one everyone knows.”

The amazed look on the woman’s face made Luka laugh. Luka’s laugh made Marinette laugh. Marinette’s laugh made Luka laugh harder.

Ivan was greeted by the sound of laughter when he turned the key in the front door’s lock. He smiled to himself. It was going to be a great day.

#lukanetteseptember2019 #marinette dupain-cheng #luka couffaine #fading ink #my writing

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lovehugsandcandy · 5 years

Text

I Want This Shit Forever (RoD, Colt x MC)

A/N: Is this a continuation of the story where Ellie gets pregnant? The tattoo story? I have no idea but I do know I was around a lot of kids this weekend so here are some of drabbles about Ellie and Colt’s family. Title from “Forever” (Drake/Eminem/Lil Wayne/Kanye West).

This might be my last RoDAW entry (we will see how my life works out today) and I just wanted to give a HUGE shout-out and thank you to the #RoDAW team, @choicesarehard @brightpinkpeppercorn @client-327 @poeticscolt @queenkaneko. The amount of WORK and EFFORT and LOVE that you guys put into this is nothing short of astonishing and I am in awe and so appreciative of you all. Thank you so much for an AMAZING week!!!

Pairing: Colt x MC, ROD

Length: ~4250 words

Rating: R (Swearing, suggestiveness, discussion of illegal activities.)

Summary: Drabbles of Ellie and Colt and baby, thrown together with no semblance of plot, but hopefully a semblance of love

Ellie sighed, deep in her bones, and it still didn’t wake up the slumbering idiot behind her.

She could feel every inch of him pressed against her back, breath hot on the back of her neck, arm hotter where it awkwardly snaked around her. She remembered when this kind of heat inflamed her, when it made her weak and pliant and putty in his hands, to be molded boneless and sex-drunk by his fingers and his lips and him, every part of him that worshiped her with single-minded devotion.

But this? She was just hot. And huge. And miserable. This was the worst.

She sighed again, louder, the rumble in her throat a warning. Still he didn’t stir.

She rolled her eyes and moved his arm, throwing it back with a bit for force than necessary before she struggled out of bed and down the hall. Everything hurt and she was tired, so tired, and emotional and fat and hot and this was the worst. She grabbed a glass of water, as cold as she could get the tap to run, holding it to her cheek as if it would do something, anything about the inferno inside her.

“El-”

She rolled her eyes. She just wanted to be miserable in peace.

“Ellie, you ok?”

Colt shuffled into the kitchen behind her, barely awake. She didn’t even think his eyes were open, hands tracing the walls, feeling his way through their small apartment.

She didn’t even feel bad. He didn’t have their child growing inside of him. She hadn’t slept in weeks.

He blinked when she didn’t answer, blurry eyes finally finding hers. “Ellie? Are you ok?”

“No.” The speed with which tears erupted in her eyes was embarrassing. She couldn’t even be appropriately annoyed without breaking down. “No, I am not ok.”

He stepped closer, looking wary. “What’s wrong?” He tried to cover up his yawn but it didn’t work, only served to infuriate her more.

“Everything! I can’t sleep, I’m too hot and I’m so tired and you are like a freaking furnace in there.”

He reached out to touch her but she swatted his hands away, instead taking giant gulps of water as if it would cool her temper along with her body.

“Do you want me to sleep on the couch?” He edged by her to open the freezer, holding out the ice cube tray to her.

She took a deep breath, balling her hands into fists. Ice. Of course. It was probably easy to be so smart when you were operating on consecutive days of uninterrupted sleep.

“No, I don’t want you to sleep on the couch!” She pushed the ice tray away.

“What do you want?” His voice was measured, weary. He wasn’t even engaging, too tired to battle with her.

Her shoulders dropped. “I don’t know. I just feel so uncomfortable, all the time.” She hated how her voice wavered but, if there was one person she could be weak in front of, it was the one person who wholeheartedly believed in her strength.

His eyes softened as he looked her over and he cracked the tray, pulling a couple of cubes out. Careful hands caressed the nape of her neck as he lifted her hair up and slowly traced the ice over her skin.

She couldn’t stop the sigh that filtered through her lips as the bite of cold took some of the edge off, dulling the burn in her body, becoming more of a smoldering flame than a bonfire licking at her body.

“Better?”

She could only nod, murmuring assent as he drew swirling designs on her neck, pulling at her shirt to get at her shoulders. As it melted, the water dripped down her spine, the rivulets trailing down a meandering path that took her breath away.

It felt so good.

She moaned, would have been embarrassed by the throaty noise, but noticed how Colt’s eyes darkened as he watched her.

At his look, at the sensations, ice water sparking her overheated skin, she was starting to get warm again, but a different kind of warmth. This kind started from her core and emanated though her nerves so that every part of her was buzzing. This was the good kind of warmth, the kind that couldn’t be sated by water and ice, but instead by the man in front of her, whose eyes were the flames that would burn her in the best of ways.

“Ellie…” His voice was a warning, hands sliding the ice down her arms. The goosebumps that followed were definitely not because of the cold.

She bit her lip and smiled. “You know, since we are both awake now, I can think of some amazing uses for this ice.”

And after, after the flames in her body had been stoked and teased and had burned her to the point of absolute delicious exhaustion, after, for the first time in weeks, Ellie slept.

~~~~~

Colt was shrugging on his shirt when Ellie pulled back the curtain.

“Everything ok?”

“Yeah.” Ellie slid her phone back in her purse. “Riya said she was going to try to put Cora down for a nap now.”

“Good. I’m gonna make a work call, if that’s ok?”

Ellie nodded, sliding into the seat and taking off her shirt. “I’ve got it.”

She settled into the seat as Jim, the tattoo artist, set up his equipment, shuffling into a comfortable position while he opened the sterile needle in front of her. She and Colt had talked about getting a tattoo to commemorate their growing family for ages, a long time. He had favored some truly horrific designs but Ellie had wanted a heart with Cora’s name in it, held firm. Finally, they compromised. At Ellie’s demand, they would each get a heart, their daughter’s name in delicate script on a curling ribbon in the center. Colt would only agree if he could choose the location, left shoulder blade, and if the heart was black, nixing the deep red Ellie favored.

Ellie smiled to herself. Relationships were all about compromise. Or, as far as she and Colt were concerned, compromise meant heated discussions and pleading until he remembered how irresistible she was and folded.

Jim grabbed the stencil and placed it against her back, grabbing a pen. “I like it. It’s almost exactly like your husband’s.”

She murmured noncommittally and then opened her eyes. “What do you mean almost?”

“Well, you won’t have the exact same tattoo, he asked me to add-”

“WHAT?!?!” Thankfully, he had just started and managed to pull the pen away seconds before Ellie sat up to glare at him. “He changed it?!?!”

He leaned back in his chair. “Well, yeah. He wanted-”

“I’m gonna kill him.” She grabbed her shirt, barely pausing to make sure that it covered her when she threw it on, and stormed into the waiting room. “COLT KANEKO!”

He was on the phone, a muttered conversation in the corner, away from the bored eyes of the receptionist. His head snapped to her as she stormed in, all fire and fury.

His eyes widened as she approached, muttering “Just get it done” before hanging up to face her head-on.

She couldn’t keep the snarl from her voice. “What is your tattoo of?”

“A heart?”

“You liar. The tattoo artist said it was different. You promised we would match!” She was barely able to stop herself from reaching out and throttling him. “What, is your family not important enough, tough guy?!?”

He blinked at her and sighed. Slowly he peeled the shirt off his back and turned. “Take the bandage off. See.”

Huffing, she ripped the tape off, smiling at his wince. The smile dropped off her face as she moved the bandage aside and could see what was underneath.

“Oh, Colt.”

It was still red, skin tender where the needle had etched the careful design. And he was right, it was a heart, black and carefully shaded against his skin. However, unlike hers, there were two ribbons; the bottom had Cora’s name, written in the same simple script as her tattoo. However, the top ribbon...

“You got my name on it.”

He turned to her and shrugged. “Yeah. My two favorite girls.” He reached up to caress her cheek. “The two most important people in my life.”

Damn, she was weak for this man. She couldn’t help but reach up to pull his lips to hers, pouring her appreciation and love into every kiss, every touch.

“Excuse me?”

She held onto him tighter, leaning into his space until their bodies were one, even the sunlight filtering in through the window unable to get through where their bodies were melded together, lips and hips together casting one shadow on the wall.

A throat cleared behind her. She kissed harder. Then a cough. Another one, louder, a warning. “Did you want that tattoo or not?”

She turned to look at Jim. “Do you think it’s too late to make an addition to it?”

~~~~~

Colt froze as he walked into the apartment, his heart stopping. He thought that the “OMG help” text Ellie sent had been because Cora was giving her a hard time. She had always been wild, inheriting both the spirit of her mother and drive of her father, but turning three had unleashed such a new level of dysfunction on their household that Colt was unsure they would recover from it.

He was expecting his daughter to be bouncing off the walls when he got home. Instead, it was silent and still, empty, and his home had been ransacked.

His breath caught in his throat as he surveyed the damage. Trash was everywhere, papers and belongings thrown haphazardly around by someone looking for something. Paint was dripping off the kitchen table, a puddle of blue spreading on the hardwood, and every single chair was overturned.

The whisper came involuntarily. “Ellie?” His stomach was falling, turning. Where was his family?

The worry, the terror, that flashed through him quickly, mind moving quickly onto a plan: search the house, then call the crew. The rage came next, a quick blinding fire in his blood; anger was the emotion he knew best, the port in any storm that he could call on. If they dared touch his family....he was going to ruin them.

Whatever they were looking for, he doubted they found it. Most anything worth stealing was at the shop, tucked away in a safe in his office. He kept a small cushion of cash under a floorboard beneath their bed but not enough to be worth this level of destruction.

He wandered to the kitchen and it was no better in here, half-eaten lunch on the counter, flour coating the ground. The dishwasher was open, bubbles foaming and spilling onto the floor. He swallowed, hard, jaw working overtime.

“Ellie?”

No answer. He moved through the apartment, checking the bathroom. Empty but, like the rest of the house, it was a disaster. The mirror was definitely not broken when he left this morning and the shower curtain had been intact, not in pieces, submerged in grimy water in the tub.

A little louder. “Ellie?!?”

Still no answer.

His hands started shaking and he balled them into fists. He knew exactly who did this, who wanted retribution for the latest job he pulled. He had been trying to keep Ellie and Cora away from his work but, apparently, it had come calling. If they laid a hand on his family, if they so much as thought about laying a hand on his family, he would kill them, destroy them, relish ending them as a message to anyone else who dare threaten the people he loved.

He swung Cora’s door open; apparently, they had been looking in here as well, dresser drawers open and askew, clothing everywhere. They had even pulled the books from her bookshelf, bedtime stories he knew by heart, open and crinkled on the carpet, wild things gnashing their terrible teeth as they looked up at him.

He was going to kill them.

He slowly opened his bedroom door and peered in, letting out the breath he didn’t realize he had been holding. It was a disaster in here too, clothing covering the floor like it was carpet, but, in the middle of their bed, Ellie and Cora were curled up, safe and sound and fast asleep. He could see where Cora had tossed and turned by the blue on the sheets, only a fraction of the paint that covered her body and clothes. What wasn’t blue was white, flour sticking to her hair like it had been shocked grey, streaks of it on her face. Ellie wasn’t any better, paint and flour and marker drawings covering her skin like amateur tattoos.

He kicked off his shoes and slid into bed behind her, dropping a soft kiss on her shoulder. The sleepy smile that greeted him when she turned brought tears to his eyes.

“You have something on your face.”

“It’s a unicorn,” Ellie whispered. “Cora drew it.”

He clutched her closer. “Of course.”

“Colt?” She was already fading, eyes drooping as she spoke, slowly. “Next sick day, you’re staying home with her.”

He smiled and nodded, watching Ellie fall back asleep before he also joined in on nap time.

~~~~~

“I am not my father.”

Ellie’s eyes burned into him, nostrils flaring. “You sure are acting like it! I can’t believe you didn’t tell me!”

Colt could barely think over the sound of his teeth grinding, jaw clenching as he worked to keep down words better left unsaid. “This is why I didn’t tell you, I knew you would react like this.”

“Oh,” she scoffed. “The problem is my reaction, not that you’re hiding things from me?”

He had to take a deep breath; he could feel the anger rising, muscles tensing, ready to fight, but in front of him was the one person he swore he would never hurt.

She continued, “This is just like something Kaneko would have done, you know.”

“Stop it!” He had to bite his tongue, hard, teeth digging into the tender flesh to have something else to focus on, somewhere else he could channel his rage. “I am not-”

“I guess the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, does it?” She swiped an angry hand over her face, glaring daggers at him.

He took a deep breath, hands clenching into fists, feeling his nails dig deep crescents into his palms, additional pieces of pain to focus on, to keep the curses and invectives in.

This is exactly why he didn’t tell Ellie about the East LA job. Or the Rolling Hills job. Or the Manhattan Beach job. Or any of the jobs the crew had pulled when he was trying to convince her and everyone else that he was nothing but a meager auto shop owner struggling to make it work in Gramercy Park.

“Mommy?”

Cora stumbled out of her room, eyes hazy, still clutching Billy, her stuffed cat companion that never left her side.

Colt let the breath out through his nose. And there was the reason he couldn’t be a meager auto shop owner, not anymore. The two reasons, Cora and Ellie, the two people he would move heaven and earth for, lift priceless sports cars for, so they would never want for anything. Hell, he would kill for them; he didn’t really think moving tons of metal was that bad in comparison.

Cora’s face lit up when she saw him and she made to run to him, into his arms, when Ellie’s quick hands reach out and plucked her up, pulling her away.

“But Mommy…” Cora’s mouth fashioned into a pout. “Daddy said we could get ice cream after nap!”

“NO!” Both Colt and Cora stared at Ellie as her shout echoed around the apartment. “You’re not going anywhere with him.”

Colt froze, staring at her, at the collision of his past and his present taking his breath away.

“But Mommy…”

Colt couldn’t breathe, blinking slowly at the pair; he was no stranger to heartbreak but this was the first time he could feel his heart physically shatter, pieces falling through his rib cage to land at this feet. His voice shook. “I have to go.”

“But Daddy…”

“Sorry, Cora, we can go later.” He didn’t even look at Ellie, keeping his eyes trained on his daughter as he backed away, hand grasping for the doorknob behind him. He had to go.

He could barely see the hallway, the stairs, the road in front of him as he drove, away, away, needing space, needing distance from his present and his past and his everything. As he sat on the cliff, head in his hands, he knew that he would never be able to outrun it all; you couldn’t get distance from yourself.

He heard the tires on the gravel, the slam of the door, the footsteps approaching, and let out a deep breath. He didn’t need to look up to know who it was, just kept his eyes on the horizon, water fading into sky in front of him. The cliff always soothed him but comfort was wanting today, even with the lapping of the waves below his feet. And, of course, it was where she knew to look for him.

“Hi.”

He didn’t answer, didn’t stir, just kept looking out. Were those seagulls?

“Can I sit?”

He shrugged, didn’t even turn as she sank to the ground next to him.

“Colt, I’m sorry.” She put a gentle hand on his arm; when he didn’t turn, she removed it to fold it into her lap. “I didn’t mean what I said.”

“You did.” His voice came out hollow.

“I didn’t.” She shifted next to him. “I am still pissed as hell but I shouldn’t have said those things. I’m so sorry.”

He shrugged again. If these were seagulls, they were fucking idiots because one just dive-bombed in to the waves like it had a death wish.

“Where’s Cora?”

“I dropped her off with my dad. They were going to hit the playground.”

He tried to temper down the flash of annoyance at the detective spending time with his daughter when he had been planning on getting her ice cream; he knew he failed by the bite in his voice. “Don’t dare tell me I can’t see her.”

“Colt, that’s not what I meant! I was just pissed”

He just stared at the stupid seagulls with no sense of self-preservation, being buffeted by the unyielding waves beneath them.

“Colt, would you just look at me!?!”

“My mom said that to me, those exact damn words.” He turned his head to look at her; she was calmer but he could see the flush of her cheeks, the familiar blaze in her eyes that he loved every time it was directed at someone other than him.

“Said what?”

“You’re not going anywhere with him.” He turned back to the waves. “About my dad.”

“Colt, I’m sorry…” She rested her hand on his arm again but, this time, she didn’t back away. “I didn’t know.”

“I know.” he shut his eyes, watching the scene in his head, one of many that would play out in a constant loop of madness when he had too much time to think. “I was 12 and I was staying with Pop more and more. His job was flexible, obviously, so he would make sure I caught the bus to school. I started staying some weekends too, hang out at the garage. We were supposed to go away for the weekend, drive up the PCH to San Fran.”

“Colt…”

He looked down at his hands. “Until my mom stormed in. Screaming, cursing. She was pissed. Apparently he was also going to San Fran to meet with a few contacts about a job, a big one. She was furious, wouldn’t let me go with him, said she wouldn’t let me out of her sight.”

Her hand slid down the jacket and slid into his palm; he twined their fingers together with a squeeze. Was he the seagull, buffeted by a past he couldn’t escape until he fell, headfirst into the water?

“After that, I barely saw him. I tried to get more involved, in the crew, in the garage, but…she moved me out East when I was 16. And you know the rest of the story.”

“Colt, I would never keep Cora from you. Ever, ever, ever.”

“Even if it was better for her?” He dropped his head. “Ellie, what if I am my dad?”

She grabbed his cheeks in both hands, turning his head so she could stare into his eyes, face solemn. “You’re not. Colt, you’re not your dad, you’re not.”

He couldn’t lift his eyes, weight of the world and his choices dragging him down.

“You’re not.” Ellie sighed. “Would you leave?”

“WHAT?!?” His eyes snapped up. “What are you-?”

“Would you leave me? Would you leave Cora?”

“Never.” He shook his head, incredulous. “Never, Ellie. There is nothing on earth that would keep me from you two, I would die befor-”

“I know.” She pulled him close, arms around his neck so she could speak in his ear. “That’s how I know you’re not your dad.”

He pulled back to look at her, her eyes shining at him. He couldn’t let her down.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

She raised an eyebrow. “No apology for committing multiple felonies and moving millions of dollars of merchandise with no warning?”

“Uhhh….Multiple?”

He grimaced when she nodded. “Do you think I didn’t talk to Ximena and get the full story?”

“I’m not going to apologize for my job.”

She let her arms fall from his neck, leaning away from him. “And what if you went to jail? Wouldn’t that keep you away from me? From Cora?”

“I’m careful, El, I swear.” It was always in the back of his mind, it was, but it was his legacy, what he was best at.

She bit her lip, considering; Colt watched the gleam in her eyes, the gears turning as she thought. His jaw dropped. “Oh my God.”

“What?”

“You want in.” He smirked. “I thought you were gonna ask me not to run the job. But that’s not it, is it?” He grinned triumphantly as he watched the blush spread across her cheeks. “You want in, don’t you?”

“I mean…I don’t want to drive, but…” Ellie glanced away, towards the horizon. “X said that you guys were still debating the escape route and I thought…”

Colt threw his arms around her, pulling her to the ground so he could pepper her face in kisses. “I fucking love you, you know that?” Or was he the waves, rough and turbulent against the shore, but always returning to the calm of the deep?

She giggled under the onslaught of his lips, squirming under him. “I have been known to have a good plan, once in a while.”

“Uh huh…” He had moved to her neck, gentle tongue tracing nonsense patterns.

“And it is us against the world, right?”

He pulled back to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. “Us against the world.”

“And I’m also not your mom.”

Colt froze to study her. “What do you mean?”

“I’m not leaving you either. Ever, ever, ever.”

He smiled, slowly, before dropping one last kiss on her lips and standing. He brushed off his jacket before he extended his hand, pulling Ellie to stand in front of him. “Us against the world.”

~~~~~

Colt stretched out in the chair and dug his feet in the sand, sighing. This was pretty great. He wasn’t even a beach person, one too many times with sand in inappropriate places tended to do that to someone, but he’d be damned if he was going to deprive Cora of something as simple as a beach day while Ellie was out with Riya. He knew she would come back soon with freshly painted toenails and chatter about Riya and Darius’s latest shenanigans.

He took a swig of his beer and watched Cora building a sand castle with some new friends, a complicated structure complete with turrets and a barn for the unicorns, of course.

“Oh my God, you almost look like a normal suburban dad.” He looked up, shading his eyes with one hand so he could smirk at Ellie as she walked over to him.

When she went in for a kiss, he pulled, sending her toppling over into his lap. He responded to her pout with a devilish grin. “I am completely respectable, thank you very much.”

“Ha. You don’t have a respectable bone in your body.”

“Mmmm…..” He cupped his hands around Ellie’s thighs and rolled his hips. “Would you like me to put a respectable bone in your-owww.”

She whacked him again, palm to his chest. “Some of the shit you say is decidedly not sexy.”

“It’s a good thing you’re sexy enough for the both of us.” He grinned, winding his fingers through her hair to pull her lips to his. She tasted like the sangria she and Riya loved and he deepened the kiss to chase every single drop.

“Ewwww….are you kissing?” He didn’t even hear the footsteps in the sand, so engrossed in his wife. Ellie turned at the voice.

“Not anymore,” he muttered at his cockblock of a daughter. “Hi, Cora. ”

The moment was quickly forgotten as Cora laid eyes on Ellie. “Mommy! I made a sand castle. Wanna see?”

“Of course, baby. One second.”

As Cora sprinted away, Ellie bent down, lips so close to Colt’s ear that the hairs on his arms stood up. “You can show me all your respectable parts later tonight.”

He could only stare, eyebrows raised, as she sauntered away, looking over her shoulder to blow him a mocking kiss.

He was so looking forward to fucking the respectability out of her.

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#playchoices fanfic #rodaw #colt x mc #colt kaneko #choices rod #amy writes

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