for legal reasons, this is a joke
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angry at derivakat for being such a talented songwriter because how am i supposed to put this song about the trauma of war in my character study playlist when the cover is this.
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home is where the house is
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i love when i have to be shapely and presentable on my side accounts/blogs because of how unprofessional i am on this one. i hope the hoagie rper doesnt find out i am the Sole Person behind joegie. i hope the people submitting media to my soup2nuts blog doesn’t know that i drew professor parsons and doug savage ship art
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Someday I’m going to go up to all my straight, 40+ year old coworkers who I accidentally convinced to read Gideon the Ninth and tell them “if you liked that, you should try homestuck!”
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one of the chocolate guys videos appears on your dash. you pause your scrolling to watch it, trying to guess what he’s making because this doesn’t seem to be one you’ve seen before. as the video goes on you get more unnerved and impressed — he seems to be making a whole human being this time, and it’s uncannily realistic. it’s even filled with candied fruit and sweet pastries in place of organs, red velvet cake and a cherry reduction making up flesh and blood beneath the chocolate. but something feels off. the person he’s making seems strangely familiar. upon the final reveal, you know why. amaury guichon has created a perfect replica of you
ETA:
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sorry I’m interpreting your cool male character as a butch dyke who sucks. she’s better now
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-Recording begins-
Spider-Man: Hi folks! I’d like to give a PSA to my usual villains, and anyone else with ideas for the next two months.
Spider-Man: *holds up a brick sized lump of metal* See this? It’s titanium!
Spider-Man: *starts flattening it out and shaping it*
Spider-Man: See, we all know that I’m crazy strong, but I never wanna really hurt anybody right? Right. While that hasn’t changed, something very important does right around this time of year.
Spider-Man: *pulls off a glove and pulls a chunk into a long stem with his nails carving lines for added texture*
Spider-Man: See, this is what we like to call exam season. Anybody who knows anything about college can tell you that it drives people up the wall, and I already climb mine when I’m antsy.
Spider-Man: *starts winding the thin sheet around the stem, delicately crimping petals in place*
Spider-Man: I do wanna be clear that this isn’t a threat, okay? I’m still not interested in crossing the line, which brings me to my point.
Spider-Man: *throws the titanium rose at the brick wall behind him, stem first, and embeds it all the way through*
Spider-Man: /That/ was restrained because I could focus enough to have full control. If I’m extremely tired or otherwise distracted, there’s just as much risk of me slipping up as someone operating heavy machinery. I’m probably not going to remember what sleep is for two whole months, so remember!
Spider-Man: *pulls out a brick and snaps it like a cookie*
Peter fucking Parker: Don’t.
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Apparently this needs to be said so
Forgetting things is morally neutral! Memory issues are morally neutral!
You're not a bad person if you...
forget things quickly
forget people
can't remember entire stages of your life
can't remember important things
can remember some things very well and forget other things all the time
can't remember things (or anything!) about your interests
forget to eat, sleep, go to the bathroom, etc
forget to reply to texts
remember things and immediately forget them again
can't remember birthdays, events, etc
frequently answer 'I forgot' to questions
can't retain new information
forget things you used to know
only remember things when it's too late
have vague, distorted and/or unreliable memories
depend on others to know how an event you were in played out
have other symptoms that are worsened by memory issues and vice versa
... and anything else I might have missed!
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