#Not to mention this is the actual first time a Scooby Doo show was really truly serialized

[bluejaypirate]

Fucking DEVASTATED there's no Phineus Phibes fanfic on AO3. Not. A. One. I am so pissed off. I want to see people BABYGIRL-IFY HIM. And believe me, if anyone on this absolut hellhole of a webbed site knew who or what i was talking about? THIS SITE? You bitches would be all over him. I'm dead serious. He is a pathetic wet cat with zero morals and the stupidest haircut in the entire fucking universe. I want to study him. He fascinates me on so many levels. He's literally the worst, and i want o run him over with my car. I want to place him in an enclosure for study and spray him with a water bottle every time he dissapoints me. I think maybe, JUST MAYBE he should kiss his stupid fucked up little scientist second in command on the mouth. Their relationship is so complicated, and it get a MILLION TIMES WORSE in the final episode, and their chemistry is so fascinating, and the tension inherent to their positions in this narrative is so thick I want to BITE it with my TEETH. I am only halfway through season one, but i KNOW where their story is going and it's KILLING MEEEE.

Oh yeah also the show I'm talking about is shaggy and Scooby Doo get a clue. I decided to watch it after the Velma show ended up being. Y'know. Bad. I kind of went into this idea of "man. I wonder how bad the previous 'worst' Scooby Doo spin off compares to this, because like. Surely it's not anywhere near this atrocious? I wonder if there might be something there worth looking into." So first i did some background research (spoiling the entire plot in the process, because everyone kind of assumes you've already seen it or don't care), and then it was off to the races! And uhh. Holy shit guys. I. I love it. So much. I need people to brainrot with please.

[v-arbellanaris]

so!!! i've talked a bit abt why i think rook might be part of the executors, but let me elaborate some more:

FIRSTLY, i thought that harding and varric were actually in kirkwall in the teaser - based off the architecture, and things like that - but thinking on it a day later, i think the little slave statues + the qunari architecture i noted here does support the idea that this is minrathous...

the first mentions of the executors as a group that we hear about is in inquisition - there's a whole wartable questline that, if you follow with leliana, shows the inquisition tracks the executors to a location in tevinter (though not minrathous specifically) until the executors ask the inquisitor to call leliana off.

BUTTTTT. absolution ended on kirkwall, and red templars in kirkwall having a new red lyrium source, and these guys in the beginning of the teaser are carrying red lyrium weapons and wearing red lyrium-embedded armour, so it COULD (to me) still be kirkwall and rook could STILL be an executor....

there's also another mention of the executors in varric's wartable questline in da:i, where you investigate someone who is writing sequels to the hard in hightown books, who is not him. in the process of investigating this hack writer, you find that a magistrate is the courier getting these books out of kirkwall - but by the time you investigate him, he's found dead and stuffed in a closet with a knife in his back, just like out of a scene in varric's book. investigating the murder further leads to a break-in at skyhold where someone leaves a letter like this:

'YOU ENCROACH UPON THE DOMAIN OF HIGHER POWERS. YOU WILL ANSWER TO US.' The letter is unsigned, except for a wax seal depicting six crossed swords.

leliana investigates the scene in the book and cross-references it with the murder and finds inconsistencies in the scene. it's at this point that we find out that there's a mention of the executors in varric's hard in hightown:

"Well, this doesn't look very interesting at all." Maysie frowned, disappointed. " 'What you have claimed belongs to greater powers. You will answer to us.' That's a lot of rubbish." ... "Oh, it's the Executors, of course!" Maysie peered excitedly at the wax seal, holding it up to the window for better light. "I should have guessed it from the silly 'great powers' nonsense. There's only been one example, on the letter claiming responsibility for the assassination of Queen Madrigal in 5:99! And this one is so much better! Just look at that imprint!" "Any idea how I'd contact these 'Executors'?" Donnen asked. "Oh, they're not real, of course. Everyone knows that."

additionally, the rip-off book consists of a lot of errors, and these errors seem to be a double-encrypted cipher. eventually, you crack the code, and it leads you to worthy, the runes guy in hightown, and it seems to conclude that he was both the killer and the author. HOWEVER, worthy himself says he didn't send the letter to skyhold, and i do wonder WHY worthy would lead a trail back to himself - especially since he has a whole little scooby doo villain line abt how he would've gotten away with it, if it wasn't for the inquisitor. so what if he didn't, and the executors really had gotten involved somehow and possibly assassinated the magistrate, and this whole thing was a ruse to cover up that murder? AAAAAAA

edit: as i'm writing this post, i just saw a sneak peak of the trailer which does seem to confirm early-game minrathous setting! i don't think this EXCLUDES rook from being an executor at all, nor does it necessarily mean he is not a kirkwall-based executor, but either way, the executors seem to have a presence in both areas!!! so!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA continues!!!!!

DOUBLE EDIT: I ALSO FORGOT TO MENTION i think it's kind of weird we keep running into this faction and bioware keeps writing ways for us to NOT find out more about them as a group of people and i dont THINK we've actually seen them as a group in the trailer yet (i feel like ive seen venatori and POTENTIALLY red templars, unless im horribly wrong BUT I DONT THINK I AM because of the templars/andruil parallels around hunting!!!!!!!! and the probably link between andruil and the origins of the blight!!!) which makes the most sense if WE'RE GONNA FIND OUT ABT THEM AS AN EXECUTOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[wackyrumble]

Barry the Chopper v.s. Roommate

Barry the Chopper - Fullmetal Alchemist

Barry was a butcher turned serial killer, who as punishment had his soul bound to armor and let him keep his murder weapons in exchange for guarding a place. He agrees to not kill when meeting the main-ish cast because of a woman he's fallen for and doesn't want her mad at him. He remains comedically docile aside from jailbreaking a woman who shot him in the hand. Read more about Barry below.

Roommate - Diary of a Tourney Kid

A clone of Adam Ruins Everything that came out wrong. He debunks things in the same way as his original, but completely incorrectly. Bill Cipher turned him into a hand puppet and fused him with a clone of another character. Fought Walter White and his evil shadow self, Walter Black. Read more about Roommate below.

Full description of Barry:

"i really dont think theres ever been another character quite like him. hes so much. his backstory is that he was a butcher who decided to be a serial killer one day because chopping up animal meat wasnt doing it for him anymore and then when he got caught and sentenced to death the government instead had his soul bound to a suit of armor that looks like sans undertales fursona and let him keep the knives he used to kill people in exchange for guarding the lab they did it to him at. and then he spends the show as a comic relief character. like hes the funniest guy in the whole thing. after his first appearance the secondary "good guy" squad run into him and decide to make him their sidekick in exchange for intel, and because they have Some moral standards they tell him chopper no chopping and he agrees because one of them is a strong confident sniper lady hes decided hes in love with and he doesnt want her to be mad at him, and then he just sits in an apartment and has sitcom shenanigans for the next couple volumes. except for when he randomly decides to stage a jailbreak for a different lady who he met once and whose only interaction with him was shooting him in the hand. and then he goes back to playing chess with his roommate. he meets his own soulless body and his first instinct is to try and chop it into little pieces and assumes anyone else would do the same thing. said body later kills both of them on accident and after that hes never mentioned again. like theres just a comic relief serial killer for a while, who doesnt actually kill anyone after being told not to but is constantly bringing up how much he loves to chop people to death with a big knife, and everyone is like "classic barry" and then he dies and the narrative goes "well alright time to move on from that". hes scared of other souls in suits of armor despite being one himself. he has cat ears. jerma likes him"

Full description of Roommate:

"OK OK OK SO LIKE. HE'S FROM THIS MASHUP TOURNAMENT HOSTED ON SOUNDCLOUD & DISCORD CALLED "DIARY OF A TOURNEY KID, RIGHT? YES, IT IS BASED OFF OF DIARY OF A WIMPY KID IN NAME, THEMING, AND A BUNCH OF THE CHARACTERS IN IT. AND YES, THE ENTIRE PREMISE WAS STARTED BY GREG HEFFLEY TRAPPING A BUNCH OF PEOPLE IN THE DIARY. LOOK. OKAY. THAT ISN'T THE POINT HERE. (including a few real people but. roommate isn't one of those real people, LOL)

so Roommate is, like, a WEIRD case. he's a clone of a TV personality version of a real guy(adam conover specifically the whole thing he does in, like, adam ruins everything), but is SPECIFICALLY STATED TO BE A SEPERATE CHARACTER IN LORE. LIKE. HES A WHOLE OTHER GUY. HE DOESNT EVEN ACT LIKE HIM. HES LIKE. THE SCOOBY DOO VILLAIN EQUIVALENT OF A MAN. all he does is run around and "Debunk" shit but hes getting it all totally WRONG. It's like, if someone who never watched adam ruins everything before took one look at its name, the blonde, glasses wearing combover having guy on the cover, and went. "oh, this guy is gonna be HORRIBLE, isnt he". and in the shows case thatd be wrong but in roommate's case, he's...he's so pathetic. he's not even the same guy at this point. (and also literally isn't. but)

He never even manages to intimidate anyone even once. not even mr beast and ninja fortnite, (part of a team called Dubious Duo) who he just. VERY much annoyed via "ruining" twitch. He also got turned into a meaty handpuppet and fused to another clone of a different character by BILL CIPHER, of all characters but then immediately fell into a hole. He got his shit beaten out of him by a 19 year old punk catboy JUST before this, too. the punk catboys name is Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart BUT HE IS IN NO WAY RELATED TO THE REAL GUY. HES LITERALLY JUST. SOME RANDOM TEENAGER.

Also, extra fun facts about him include: during an event that happened on the discord, he canonically went ":3". He made his own ytp and posted it on the soundcloud account, too. he put a bunch of goofy wacky cartoon sounds in it. (his mashups use these sounds a lot outside of the ytp, too.) (incase you REALLY wanted to hear the ytp, though. here it is: https://soundcloud.com/doatk/ytpmv-02?in=doatk/sets/bonus )

P.S: extra information from a friend because they like to infodump this sort of thing & this isn't nescessary at all. but: He gets the fandom nickname of "Roommate" from his connection to Collegehumor & the Insane Clown Posse song In My Room, which he used in the tournament & is strongly associated with. He's so. He's so normal.

(P.S, P.S: THE IMAGE I SENT WITH THIS IS TECHNICALLY ART OF HIM FROM A CROSSOVER WITH ANOTHER SOUNDCLOUD TOURNAMENT THAT HAPPENED. BUT. its the best render i have that isnt done in like. ms paint LOL. IN SAID CROSSOVER (WITH A TOURNAMENT CALLED "THE PERFECT TOURNAMENT") HE ALSO FOUGHT WALTER WHITE AND HIS. EVIL SHADOW SELF, CALLED WALTER BLACK. WHO WAS LITERALLY HIS SHADOW.)

also: nobody in the fandom knows what his deal is, either. they literally just couldnt catch the real adam conover at first so they (In canon) just went "well! time to make a clone, i guess!" and then he came out WRONG."

[xleeleeboox]

Gareth headcannons PT2!!

Warnings: not really any, mentions sex but it’s not smutty so minors can read ahead :)

305 words (it’s short because I already have other headcannons for him)

——————

* Gareth doesn’t wear colors he really only wears dark green and red, and maybe a grayish blue but that’s like it

* Converse

* Prefers silver jewelry to gold

* Does not like edibles, honestly else would rather smoke but doesn’t like doing it alone, and only smokes at night

* He doesn’t like bugs in the house but out of the house they are cool

* He tried to let a possum once

* He buys you keychains that remind him of you, and he gets you a keychain that says his name on it so you can keep it with you at all times

* I think I’ve said this before but he likes rocks, and he likes crystals so if you give him any at all they are staying in his room and probably by his window or on his dresser

* I just know that he like doesn’t have condoms on hand, if you know what I mean

* Like it’s not such an occurrence that he has to use them and he hasn’t needed them until he got with you

* You two better not break up because all other sex is now ruined because you of, you are it for him he only wants you

* He dates to marry that’s what I’m sayin

* Listens to the radio on certain stations to show you songs he thinks you’ll like

* Great at wrapping rectangular presents but if it’s a giant cube shape or something not rectangle, he just puts it in a bag

* He helps his parents/grandparents wrap presents for his sibling

* Looooooves Halloween but he doesn’t like matching couple costumes unless they are actually good ideas (or at least original)

* Likes scooby doo

* Your first kiss, the first one was awkward so he said “erase all of what just happened let’s try that again”

* God he blushes so easily

———————

[icy-watch]

Ok, Wojira is real.

Didn't really doubt that she was, but at least she's still asleep. The only problem is: Not for long.

Something's going to happen and she's going to wake up. And it's going to cause Problems. But that's problems for the next season.

So, Scooby-Doo inspired hijinks. It sucks that Ronin fell to capitalism. I'm not surprised, but I am disappointed. He's so much better than that. Him and Clutch took big hits this season.

A couple of people have mentioned that the next season is Seabound. I think I'm going to make some predictions on what that means tomorrow when I watch the first episode. I'm getting a little too eepy rn.

I'm going to quickly do my correct and incorrect predictions here, and call it a day.

I'm only going to do 1 episode tomorrow. I know myself by now. So until then!

Correct and incorrect predictions are under the cut.

Correct

Tim clearly knows more about the island than he's telling the ninja. He did, and I feel so bad for this guy. Trauma, y'all. It really messes with you.

The thing in the fog is not Wojira. Y'all, if I honestly was just bingeing this show, I doubt I would have noticed the jaw moving weird and the sounds the boat was making. I might have thought something was off with the fireballs, but do this is only making me more observant.

Incorrect

Adventure Team was captured because they were trespassing or getting too close to Something. It was thought that they were there to steal the amulet. Which, Clutch was planning on it after he saw it. Maybe before.

Rescue Team has a Scooby-Doo vibe. The "monster" reveal is going to be an actual monster, not some dude in a mask trying to make money from ghost hunters or drive the native people away or something along those lines. Well. I guess I was very wrong about this one.

Wojira is going to be awoken this season. She was not. I'm surprised her eyes didn't snap open in that last shot of her.

Jay (with Nya) will awaken Wojira somehow.

Partially

The ninja are going to be split up at some point. Half of the group are going to be captured. They did split up, twice! The first time Lloyd split from the group, and the second Jay split from the group. But not half of them.

Lloyd and Tim's plot this season (with maybe Zippy) is to rescue the others. That was Lloyd's plot (with the help of Zippy). Tim's was to work around his past trauma thru exposure therapy.

Unconfirmed

The storm and the statues are connected somehow. I was going to put this in correct or partially, but there was never really a solid yes or no to this. There was some connection to the Keepers/Islanders and the statues, but not really with the storm.

Wojira is likely to be the main antagonist for s14. Well, we don't know that yet, so 🤷

[etherealnoir]

Found Episode 12 Thoughts

I think yesterday's episode was the first time in a while that I was actually fully engaged in the missing person's plot. And that's mainly because it didn't feel so formulaic and the stakes ACTUALLY felt high. I looked to see who the writer was, and it was Sonay Hoffman. Whoever she is, she did a phenomenal job.

Further thoughts below the cut:

Asking Dhan to do her dirty work was the MOST I've ever disliked Gabi since this season started.

I was glad that someone FINALLY called Gabi out and told her that she can't just expect people to throw themselves down on the sword for her whenever she wants. I'm happy that she apologized to Dhan for asking him to fix HER mistake. But I hate that she was so flippant about his disappointment, initially. And I mentioned this on Twitter a few weeks back, I think. She knows that Dhan has PTSD that he's working through. She knows that he's trying to get better. And she treated him like a guard dog to sic on Sir because she didn't want to take the initiative and do what she said she would. I would almost say it's OOC but it really isn't, considering she's shown signs of thinking Dhan is her guard dog in the past. He's loyal, but he's not a pushover. And I liked that. The way he was mean mugging and side eyeing her for the entire episode took me out.

I'm kind of happy that they confirmed that Dhan DID know that Gabi had Sir (at some point), but didn't know that she STILL had him. And was keeping him as like...a pet. And so his reaction was 100% warranted. I also would've been like GIRL WHAT THE FUCK? I THOUGHT YOU KILLED HIM! Which is kind of funny because it confirms that he does think captivity is worse than death, which Gabi doesn't seem to agree with.

I felt so bad for Zeke when he tried to leave the house to find Gabi and couldn't. But I also felt sadder because he was killing it throughout this ENTIRE episode. From minute one he was on top of things and knocking it out of the park. The only part that confused me was that he called Gabi knowing that she was at a party to tell her about this truck, when it would've been easier to just text the information to her. That felt contrived. I could see if he texted her a bunch FIRST, and if she didn't respond, he decided to call her instead.

I felt more about the death in this episode than I did about the death in the other episode, mainly because we were given a chance to give a shit about this character's welfare before we learned they were gone. We've yet to have a case where we're searching for someone and they turn up dead. Especially in a method that's so violent. This kind of leads me to believe that this show has the ability to go darker. It just needs to polish its language a bit and stop letting all of the culprits admit everything like Scooby-Doo villains. Once we get there, we'll be alright.

[canidkid]

i saw that you have brett hand agere headcanons and as a trauma kin seeking comfort i’m going to have to ask you to share [pretty please?] /lh

Auuughh this took a bit I'm sorry!!

BUT WITH PLEASURE!! 🌠

..

BRETT HAND AGERE HEADCANONS ⭐🌈🐛🩹 !!

CW: panic attack mention, vent reg mention

**He first noticed it during the comedown periods after panic attacks. He'd get all floaty and ditzy for a bit. Brought it up with his therapist. They recommended looking into age regression and to see if he could potentially use it beneficially. - Sure, why not. Initially just got himself some adult coloring books and markers and started watching kids shows while he found his way back into a stable headspace. - It, eventually, did escalate. Namely with his regression being triggered at cognito, being the first time that had ever happened with someone else (Andre and Reagan) present.

He no longer struggles as much with accepting that side of himself. It's just the way he is. He's an adult, who sometimes just isn't. And that's okay. - **It's become more peaceful as well, no longer being exclusively triggered by panic attacks but also now being somewhat voluntary to de-escalate in certain situations.

His age range is both broad and hard to pinpoint! So he'll be sitting with a pacifier and a plushie...watching or doing something entirely not toddler appropriate!

He likes chewlery, teethers & pacifiers at any age! Though, he does have a general preference for chewlery!

Is really into just watching people, especially Reagan!! (she's still nervous about having the kid in her lab though, she doesn't like children, they are sticky…)

Definitely a little displaced in time, prefers 80s nostalgia over his actual 90s childhood

Loves to learn, anything and everything, bothering people with 2nd grade level fun facts is considered an activity for him

Fidgety. Never stops moving. His energy levels seem to somehow increase !? Loves outdoor play when he succeeds in pestering someone long enough to actually play with him!

Tends to float more around middle-space, at about 10-12!

"do you have games on your phone?" energy

Scooby Doo, Blue's Clues, Ghostbusters and Sesame Street are common background noise in the Hand Bachelor pad !

Not mega picky with food! But...if you really can't get him to eat something...ketchup or sprinkles will help 9/10 times..little weirdo /lh

Collects doggie toys!! Especially plushies!

The one thing he kept from his actual childhood is a yellow puppy luvvie,, it's still in pretty good shape and he's often toting it with him around the house!

Overall I think he's really just the sweetest little kid. He needs a fair amount of reassurance from those watching him that he, in fact, is not being too much or annoying. And they, IN FACT, are doing this because they love him and want to see him happy!!

**He does have his moments, not surprisingly. He's not always a happy camper when small, especially if negatively triggered. Sometimes it's a bit of a gamble if he'll come up from an episode and stay in his adult headspace, slip under and relax, or if you're gonna have an especially teary and clingy kiddo.

The gang loves him. Reagan would commit unspeakable atrocities for this kid. Gigi just wants to shower him in prezzies from rich auntie! Andre and Myc are..questionable babysitters...but nothing has happened yet! (because no one lets them babysit.) And Glenn has to be verbally whacked on occasion - no, Mr Dolphman, Brett does not want to learn how to [insert strange dolphin surgery veteran activity] !!!

I don't want this post to be too long but tbh I could go on!!! ⭐🌈

I hope these are good and enough for now >:]]

[deeply-unserious-fellow]

HOT TAKE TIME!!!!!! The episode Nowhere to Hyde from the most iconic show of all time, Scooby Doo Where Are You, is one of the most accurate adaptations of the Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde there is.

HERE ME OUT HERE ME OUT-

First of all. Hyde is just a horrid man.

Just-just a horrible green man who's only here to steal shit and have a good time. He communicates exclusively through pointing at things and laughing all evil like & grunting. Which Hyde doesn't actually do in the book but like tell me he WOULDN'T do that, generally speaking. He's ugly as shit. He doesn't kill anybody but he does try to turn Shaggy into a frog which has to count for something! Just a strange, horrible, evil little dude, which is what all the best Hyde's are!!! Kinda wish he was short but like. I understand why he isn't. Scooby villains can't change their heights-

Second; The relationship between Jekyll and Hyde is very similar to the one in the book. He is, quite literally, a disguise Dr. Jekyll puts on to engage in Nefarious Activities(tm) so he won't have to face the consequences! Pretty standard Scooby Doo villain thing, which is probably why this is one of the better interpretations, Scooby Doo villains are notoriously Just Normal Guys in costumes. Sure the whole addiction element is removed because Scooby Doo also wasn't doing supernatural/sci-fi shit back then, but still! It's better then a lot of other adaptations! Jekyll's explanation at the beginning of the episode plays into the pop culture idea of J&H, sure, but to be fair Jekyll kinda started falling into that mindset in his confession. In the original novel it's more of a coping mechanism so he doesn't have to face the fact that yes, he DID do those crimes, instead of just being a cover story, but it's still a noteworthy parallel. Also everybody is shocked by Jekyll and Hyde being the same person even though it's kinda obvious. Like obviously in the original novel everybody thought it was impossible because a guy completely changing their body at will is an absurd concept but still-

And my final point, appearently the events of the original novel actually happened in this universe??? I mentioned this in a reblog a couple days ago and it doesn't really. Add anything to this argument but somebody has to say it!!! The fact that everybody consistently refers to Hyde as 'the Ghost of Mr Hyde' means there wAS PREVIOUSLY A NOTORIOUS GUY NAMED MR HYDE WHO DIED!!!!!!!! Also DR JEKYLL LITERALLY SAYS HIS GREAT GRANDFATHER WAS THE ORIGINAL DR J. LIKE THEY ARE LITERALLY RELATED FUCKIN- Also appearently after Jekyll died everybody found out about him being Hyde? Which I wanna know how THAT happened. Like did Utterson or Poole go public with his confession? That seems kinda out of character for them but whatever. Maybe somebody else got their hands on it...

And that's why Scooby Doo Where Are You s2 ep1, Nowhere to Hyde, is one of the most accurate adaptations of the story of Jekyll and Hyde. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk :)

[frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe]

you mentioned maybe doing some destiel for the prompt thingy... 23 and 60 were giving me such dean vibes i would love to see you do more destiel stuff <3

hello, friend!! thank you so so much for requesting these!! i've literally never actually written any destiel stuff, so i really hope you enjoy! 🫶🫶

23 - “It’s hard to get used to…” “what is?” “Being someone that someone cares for…” 60 - “I’ve never felt this way before and I’m terrified to be honest.”

pairing: destiel | word count: 1,508 | rated: T

request a prompt from here!

Damn fuckass witches…they should all go straight to hell.

What lesson is he supposed to be learning anyway, it’s not like she gave him any sort of hint. 

…Okay, maybe she did, but it’s not Dean’s fault he wasn’t listening, it’s her fault for chanting her freakin’ curse after throwing him around like she did.

Make his ears ring then tell him the thing that could help break the spell? Not cool.

What the fuck ever, they’re back at the bunker now, the whole case being a dud anyway. That damn witch was behind the ‘ghost’ reports they had gotten, having just conjured one to keep people off her lawn. A classic Scooby-doo type.

Now the only things on Dean’s mind were to get the fuck back home (check), take a long-ass shower (heading there now), and avoid Cas like his life depended on it (…remains to be seen).

Cas being back at the bunker for a long stretch of time like this was a good thing, a great thing, really. He was finally back in one spot where Dean could keep an eye on him, make sure he’s okay for real. No phone calls, no prayers that go unanswered more than half the time, just Cas. Down the hall. Safe and sound. 

And that’s where the (current) problem lies.

Dean’s Cas Problem™ had been slowly building and burning and broiling under his skin for years now. Since that first goddamn meeting in that barn covered in ineffective banishing sigils.

It had to come to a head sometime, and Dean'd much rather that time be when he's not just recently been cursed to only tell the truth.

He successfully avoided the angel for about seven hours.

The next morning, when Sam was either already nose deep in research on Dean’s newest affliction or out -gag- jogging, Dean makes his way to the kitchen for some sustenance.

He’s hoping to be sneaky enough not to alert Cas to where he is, lest the angel try to cook for him again. 

Cas has been doing that a lot. Cooking. Said he found it to be ‘quite fulfilling’ even though all foods only ever ‘taste like molecules’ to him

The act never failed to throw Dean farther down the You’re totally in love with your best friend who’s an angel and also a dude hole he’s dug himself into over the years.

Food is Dean’s ultimate love language. Being given his favorite beer after a long hunt, a plate of homemade treats from the mom whose boy they’d saved, even just a simple slice of pie for lunch while on the road for a while? Astounding, amazing, perfection, 10/10.

It goes the other way too; he loves to cook for someone. It’s how he shows his love for the people around him. He likes just knowing exactly how much of each dumb rabbit food to add to the frankly enormous omelet he makes for Sammy every Saturday, or exactly how much lemon zest he should add to the blueberry pie for the elderly Ms. Aggie up at the grocery store.

Loves it.

So that’s why whenever the particularly gorgeous celestial being that’s taken over Dean’s heart cooks for him, he folds. Wants so badly to love the angel, be loved by him in return. But it’s the most frightening thing he’s ever come face to face with.

Sometimes Dean thinks the affections are returned, but even after all these years he still can’t quite read the full meaning behind anything Cas does.

For the Dean of Now, it’s a compounding problem that will go completely off the rails if Cas finds him in the kitchen.

He’ll find Dean there, insist that Dean ‘rest. You are only human.’, and take up making breakfast himself.

With this curse on him, Dean doesn’t want to even think of the possible things he’d admit to without wanting to.

So he prays (hah) that Cas is gone off somewhere else for just the moment, somewhere far far far away from the bunk—

“Good morning, Dean.”

Fuck.

‘Just keep your mouth shut, Winchester. Don’t make a sound.’

“How are you feeling?”

Dean grits out a simple “Fine.” He’s not lying, physically he feels perfectly fine if a little sore. “Maybe a little sore.”

Cas nods, “Were you about to make breakfast?” he asks, stepping past dean to the stove and turning on one of the burners.

‘Mouth shut mouth shut mouth shut–’

Luckily, Cas is facing away from him and doesn’t see his head nodding in betrayal.

“Dean?”

Dean’s response is slow, each word said very carefully. “I was, but now I am going to just have coffee.” Hey, it’s not a lie if he’s changed his mind.

Cas turns to face him. “Dean, humans cannot subsist on coffee alone. Shall I make you breakfast?”

“No, it’s alright Cas, really. I want coffee.”

A loud grumble emanates from his stomach the moment he stops speaking.

There’s a smirk on the angel’s face now. “Sounds like I should make you something.”

He turns back to the stove, reaching for and setting down a pan from the hook on the wall, and gets to work freakin’ caring and shit.

Dean can’t do much else but to sit back down at the table and wait for food to be made for him.

He can’t protest in the slightest because he really does want more than coffee. As soon as Cas said it the second time, Dean’s brain flipped from ‘Just Coffee’ to ‘Breakfast’ and wouldn’t flip back no matter what Dean thought. 

He couldn’t say anything to the contrary, couldn’t even shake his head ‘no’. All he could do was stare down the tabletop.

So, he stares and stares and stares at the wood in front of him, until the sight in front of him is changed from particularly swirly knot to honest-to-goodness breakfast smiley face. Eyes made of eggs and a salty bacon smile.

The look on his face must be positively tragic because Cas asks “Is something the matter? Did you want your eggs scrambled instead?”

Dean tries to keep the words at bay, his head shaking no for him.

“Then what is it—”

Dean doesn’t keep his mouth shut hard enough. “It’s hard to get used to…”

Cas is guiet for a moment and a half. “What is?”

“Being someone that someone cares for…”

Cas sets down the other plate he was holding, the green shit all over it giving away that it’s for Sam when he gets back, and sits down kitty-corner to Dean (who’s still staring down the same spot).

“Dean—”

Fuck. He’s let something slip and now all of it’s threatening to spill out after it.

“I’m so used to taking care of others, you know? It’s all I’ve ever known. Take care of Sammy, take care of victims, hell, even taking care of those few terrified spirits that don’t know they’re even doing anything wrong!

“I like to take care of people, I like making sure they have what they need, yeah? But whenever you’re around, you’re the one taking care of me.”

Cas nods, “I do, because I care fo—”

“And I don’t ever tell you how much I really appreciate it, hell, it’s what made me fall in lo—”

Dean snaps his mouth shut. Nope nope nope, not doing that. Never. Cas doesn’t need that shit.

“Dean?”

He finally looks up at the angel beside him. 

Cas’ brows are furrowed, his head tilted slightly in confusion, as if he’s trying his damndest to read Dean’s mind.

Dean’s eyes lock with Castiel’s and…

“I love you Cas.”

He can barely process the holy shit, I said it–god fucking mother— before his mouth is barreling onward. “I’m so in love with you, man, haven’t been the same since that night in the barn.

“I love you when you’re full angel, when you’re human; I loved you when you didn’t even know who we were, when you disappeared after the whole leviathan thing, when you went a little insane and became obsessed with bees…I’ve been slowly falling for you since we met, Cas.” He pauses for only a moment, and is off again in the next breath. “I’ve never felt this way before and I’m terrified, to be honest–” he chuckles sardonically at that, “as if I could be anything else right now.”

Cas’ eyes grow wide. “Dean—” his voice placating in tone.

‘Fuck, of course he’s not going to return the feeling; damn emotions, damn angels, damn motherfucking witches!’ 

“Hey, morning guys! That omelet for me?” Sam interrupts before Dean can be let down fully, loping into the kitchen all flushed and sweaty--ah, so a jog, then.

Dean huffs out a breath, scrubbing his face clear of the couple wayward tears that had snuck down his face. “Yeah, Cas made it for you.”

“Sweet, thanks Cas, I–whoa, Dean, what’s wrong?”

Dean clamps his lips shut once again, stands slowly, and walks out of the kitchen with a short pat to Sam’s shoulder.

[iplayghoul]

𝐡𝐚𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝... 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐠𝐠𝐲?

pairing:: eren yeager x reader

word count:: 1k

warnings:: haunted houses, eren is a scaredy cat, zombie actors, fluff & comedy, mentions of sex, suggested stuff but no smut here lol my bad (soon tho)

notes:: cute lil eren fic for halloween lol, reblogs and comments appreciated 💕 lets me know if this is ass or not!

𝐡𝐚𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥, maybe if he didn't wear that ugly ass costume of shaggy from scooby doo.

"din' i tell you, your costume fuckin' sucks Eren?" you seethed at him, semi-playfully because his costume was actually horrible.

you're checking your purse again as eren parked the car outside the halloween amusement park even, counting your extra lip gloss, lashes incase you lost one, lash glue, condoms and mints; keeping mental notes of everything you brought with you from home.

"and 'fore you say anything, like my nails?" you put down the purse briefly and looked to the side at eren who was dressed as shaggy from scooby doo; showing him the long stiletto nails you got, a black base fading into blood red tips. he smiled a little, "yea, it's cute, sweet girl."

"n' my costume's good, aight?" he shot back, peering down at you and chuckled while you rolled your eyes.

sharp nails dusted some short strands of blonde hair away from your eyes, pretty lace front tied into two pigtails. then, your lace clad hands tugged straight the black dress you wore, feeling it ride up your thighs every time you moved in the car.

"nah, you know it is. i told you since october first! 'hey 'ren im dressin' as misa for halloween, you better show up to my apartment as light yagami or you gettin' kicked out' or sumn like that, remember?" wet glossy red lips smacked together as you chewed your gum loudly. eren, unamused, "now ion- ion remember hearin' dat last part, baby." he smiled at you and gave an aerated chuckle.

"shuddup shuddup! let's go, we don't got all night." you shut him up quick and unlocked the car door waiting for eren to do the same,

"what's the rush, huh? want me to fuck you in that costume when we get back to your apartment?" he sucked a lip between his teeth and looked at you expectantly while you open the door, "no dumbass, maybe you woulda got sum' if you were dressed as light, damn!" shutting the car door on him. eren shook his head and followed along.

"two tickets to the haunted house please!" you chirped at the attendant, chilly fall air tickling your almost bare legs that eren kept a large hand on. he wasn't too fond of the way the clerk looked at you but kept his comments to a minimum, letting you drag him to the entrance cheerily.

despite his rough and tough act, in a shaggy costume, eren loathed horror, scary movies and of course: haunted houses.

"you really wanna' do this?" he pulled you back from entering the pathway and started whining and rocking your shoulders back and forth in a terrible attempt to convince you otherwise. 

"and what do you suggest we do otherwise mr. yeager or should i say shaggy?" he cleared his throat quickly, "first of all, don't call me that. second of all, can you leave my shaggy costume alone? it's cute girl, i know you like it."

you blinked your eyes, in false astonishment.

"this sassy ass nigga pandemic has got to stop, jesus fuckin' christ. look- c'mon on," you grabbed eren's arm and pulled him in the entrance.

ghoulish music sounded out on the entrance, eren held onto your waist and you his arm as you navigated shortly in the dark beginnings. the narrow, bending path through the haunted house before you came upon a blue-green glow of the upper lights lining the walls that were decorated with fake spider webs, skeletons and witch dummies.

"oh wait, this cute as hell hold on," you whispered with a giggle, peeping back to look up at eren who had a frozen look of terror on his face.

you snickered, pulling out your phone and snapping a bright picture of his face and then one of the haunted room. just as you turned back to put your phone away, you felt a tug at your purse, you swung your body to the left, "what the fuck is that!" eren bawled out behind you gripping your purse and dragging you backwards.

you were more focused on getting him to get off your dior purse, "'ren stop grabbing my fucking bag!" you wrangled with him, annoyed, "fucking— babe look behind you!" swirving around you see a tall gorey looking figure, cleary made to be a zombie wearing ripped clothing and groaning as he came near you both.

visibly annoyed and agitated, you let out a high pitched scream, eren and the zombie froze, the latter ducking the minute you swung your purse around: effectively giving the actor a fatal smack down. you grabbed eren and left the groaning zombie behind your heels and rounded the next corner.

with a quickness, and swings of your heavy purse beating whatever was in your way, you skipped out through the swirly pathways, dragging  eren by his loose green shirt until you saw the bright lights of the amusement park's rides.

"if you pull that shit again i swear to god im gon' beat yo ass right in there with that damn zombie too!" you pointed a finger in his face, a sheen of sweat covering him and he gulped, "it was fuckin' scary im sorry! did you see his face?" you dropped your wait onto your other heel, "be fuckin' for real right now, let's get some snacks and go back to my apartment." you pouted up at him and his lips twitched with a bit of guilt.

"aight what about..." he rocked back and forth on his feet, "if we get korean hot dogs n' glazed donuts, we c'n ill sit quiet n' watch the original scream with you."

you rubbed your lips together, pondering on his options and patting your makeup with an oil sheet, "deal. let's go and don't make me regret this shit."

— masterlist.

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

Pericles and Purple Scarves (or: why the fuck is the parrot so horny, and why does it matter)

(or: did i think about this way too much, or exactly the right amount? yes.)

[cws: fantasy racism/ableism, dehumanization, mention of homophobia and canon-typical grooming, non-detailed discussion of canon-typical SA/sexual harassment and canon-typical bestiality. this show is a thing and a half]

-

something i think about a lot is that like.... i joke about how delightful it is for various reasons that they made pericles So Relentlessly Horny, and it's fucking hilarious to me to see in real-time the dawning horror of people watching the show for the first time and realizing he's sexy. (their reactions to the tentacle scene are comedy fucking gold every time.)

on a doylist level the creators are obviously paying homage to his voice actor, making him stand out from the other mascots, and trying to make him charismatic, memorable, and that much more uncomfortable to the audience. and it worked! pretty much everyone thinks he's one of the best scooby-doo villains out there, and they're right.

(i'm not biased, i swear.)

when you look at it in-character, though, it makes a lot of sense that he'd be that way, and that's important. he's doing it on purpose.

for one thing--again--he stands out among all the other talking animals we see, because he is the one who comes across most as a depiction (an intentional one, anyway 🙃) of an actual person who happens to be shaped like a bird. the others all are Some Kind of Uniquely Goofy in the way that they act, be it how they talk or their general mannerisms or the fact that none of them seem to really have an implied Age. pericles is the only one who doesn't have some kind of silly voice or speech impediment or catchphrase what-have-you, and he's also the only one who comes across as being in specific life stages you could map onto a human corresponding to how old he is. he's even the only time we ever hear mention of a talking animal being a child, or having been once. everyone but pericles is just Mascot-Aged.

(fwiw, my personal read is that scooby is about the same age as the gang or equivalent. also there is So Much to unpack here about all that re: the mascots in general but that's a post for another time)

and the one thing they all have in common except pericles is that they are NOT supposed to be sexy. if anything, the ones we actually see talking (in a fever dream, to be fair) except scooby and pericles are obviously meant to be borderline or outright really goddamn annoying. (reggie/dyno-mutt is adorable but he is also on thin ice with me on this one, sorry little guy.)

and like. all of this lines up with the fact that the talking animals very obviously represent disabled people. even moreso than they represent racial minorities, which they very much do! they're a lot further toward ableism on the sliding scale of xeno bigotry (which is a big reason i'm iffy about just calling it fantasy racism). the infantilization of disabled people is, you know, A Whole Ass Thing, and being aggressively desexualized is a major part of that. Disabled People and Disabled Mannerisms are a Bonerkill.

enter pericles, who does not truck with any of this shit.

i've already got a lot of posts planned going into this subject in general, because there is So Much. but in short, the thing to remember when you examine anything about pericles is that he lives in a world that draws zero distinction between people like him and animals.

practically everything he does is, on some level or another, him yelling FUCK YOU LOOK AT ME I AM A PERSON, LOOK. I'LL MAKE YOU IF I HAVE TO. and what's something animals don't do, whether actual animals or annunaki descendants (at least the latter ones he's probably been around most)? they don't flirt. they aren't sexy. they don't act like a brand of seductive, even skeevy, person you might feasibly meet irl, if maybe a theatrical larger-than-life one who runs in certain circles.

(gay ones, to be specific. super, super gay ones. more on that in a minute.)

and, what's more: they don't flirt with humans. we never see anyone really comment on the very obvious Thing he's always had going on with ricky; but that doesn't come across as them thinking it's normal or acceptable so much as not noticing that it's a thing at all. it is that aggressively unthinkable that it would be. and this is backed up even more by the fact that people hear scooby ask shaggy if he's cheating on him by having a girlfriend and think nothing of it, and it continues to be treated as Romance vs Platonic Friendship/Pet Ownership. Gal Pals, but Worse!

so yeah, we have no idea what society would think of anunnaki descendants having sexual/romantic relationships with humans that they couldn't ignore. presumably it would be Pretty Well Disapproved Of, but like. who the fuck knows.

what we DO know is that pericles is considered so utterly beneath personhood that no one would so much as blink at him fucking an honest right to god animal. if it were anyone other than, y'know, pericles, they might even think it was cute.

(AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.)

(moving on.)

so all things considered, as you can imagine holy SHIT would he have a reason or two to broadcast as hard as he can that not only that he is A Sexual Being, but one intended to appeal to human standards. it brings to mind queer people presenting in ways meant to be attractive to other queers, not straight people, except, well. instead of trying to get the attention of supportive people like you on the downlow, because you don't want the majority to know what kind of sexuality you're announcing, he's blaring I AM ONE OF YOU at that majority out of desperation and spite.

which, speaking of signaling queerness: pericles is a hundred percent gay-coded, as in the actual definition of 'as close to explicit as they could get away with, done on purpose.' there's the obvious--his relationship with ricky--but his VA, who he is to some extent modeled after, is an openly gay indie horror film icon, and given that and the time period he grew up in i don't think it's a coincidence that the one piece of clothing he chooses to wear is a purple scarf. (they even made him a sexual predator! yippee!)

so like, if anything it's pretty feasible that he might have actually observed that kind of thing as a phenomenon, especially with the demographic he'd actually be interested in, and pick it up accordingly. who knows if he ever managed to actually, y'know, Involve Himself with any human men--my interpretation is that he did and it went poorly 🥲--but it makes sense to me that he'd wear something like that; that he'd use his one opportunity to express himself with clothing to go HI HELLO I AM A PERSON DID I MENTION I LIKE MEN. WHO ARE PEOPLE. BECAUSE I DO

......and he STILL gets ignored no matter how hard he tries. i feel like that's one of the reasons he ended up being such a creep, honestly: operating on similar logic to the tag rant in this post, the conclusion he comes to is that well fuck you, you can't ignore me having a sexuality if i make it a problem for you. even if you try to pretend sexual violence and harassment aren't sexual, or don't recognize that it's happening at all, you are not going to walk away unaffected by it. if the only lasting evidence he's able to leave in the world that he's a person is causing damage that can't be shrugged off or undone, so be it.

(a real irony, isn't it, given how things turn out in the end.)

and like. this is one of the things that really bothers me about people trying to act like you shouldn't ship pericles or think he's attractive because Ew Gross Cringe That's an Animal (or transparently pretending it's because Problematic, not because cringe). either way do what you want 'cause a pirate is free, to be clear, but like... that's the point, man. that's the whole point. the writers are assholes who wanted you to miss it, and you did.

basically: just about everything pericles does is acting out in some way or another, and that's why we know what this man would sound like busting a nut. you're welcome.

[anewp0tat0]

Besides Black Butler, are you into any other fandoms?

don't try to expose me now👀 no but really, not really. Black Butler is the only fandom that I'm active in right now, besides occasionally scrolling through the tags of some other things I like out of curiosity. I guess I'll just mention those to give you a nice answer.

for starters, my fandom a little before this one was actually How to Train Your Dragon lol, it was small but probably one of the best and kindest experiences, im glad i still keep up with some peeps. I watched AtLA for the first time only 2 months ago and then rewatched TloK, and surprise suprise they're great shows, and I'm looking forward to future Avatar stuff. recently I did a sewing project so I rewatched some favorite cartoons for nostalgia, such as Gravity Falls and Scooby-Doo: Mystery Incorperated. somehow I even ended up drawing Scooby-Doo fanart in my downtime cause 1. they're icons, and 2. I need to improve my traditional drawing.

and of course ever since my friends and I saw the new Spiderverse, we've all just been sending eachother whatever art or memes we find cool, so I'm absorbing a ton of that.

as for shows that aren't cartoons lol, it's been a while since I've seen a live action show that left me thinking of it for a while after. except for Extraordinary Attorney Woo, and it's not just cause it's the first show I've ever watched with my mom.

so no I'm not *in* any other fandoms, but I am *into* other fan, stuff.

I'll throw this question right back at ya mary 😌 thanks for asking!

[epithet-beloved]

ROVER GADABOUT ROMANTIC HEADCANONS

synopsis… headcanons about being in a romantic relationship with Rover Gadabout

ft. Rover Gadabout, [SUE] (mentioned), Robin Stardancer (mentioned), Rover’s unnamed daughter (mentioned)

tags… anime campaign, anime campaign filler, relationship study, Rover is gross, like really gross, but you love him, fluff, lots of van jokes, Rover does not have custody of his daughter

word count… 916

a/n… @purpleisdebeste THIS IS ALL FOR YOU MAN. I STUDIED FOR THIS AND EVERYTHING. This blog exists to write obscure anime campaign characters and I am determined to know all of the rare sillies. Collect them all like pilot command cards ✧ 🦄

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 It doesn’t matter if you’ve been married for ten years, he still lives in his fucking van.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 You could have a house with a mortgage and he would still sleep in his van every night. Just walks into the garage, climbs into the backseat and conks out.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 I feel like Rover’s love language is quality time. Not so much a guy for receiving gifts because he doesn’t see the point in being gifted a sweet dessert or savory meal when hamburgers out of the dumpster suit him just fine.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 However, he will gift you things that he’s found in the trash, so please accept them with a smile. Even if he doesn’t show it all the time, he likes making you happy.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 An ideal date for him is watching VHS tapes on a CRT TV in the back of his van and eating cup noodles.

“Why do you like watching Scooby Doo so much?”

He stared at the TV vacantly. “There’s a van in it.”

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Also, the mental fortitude you need to possess to cuddle this smelly man is unimaginable. I salute you.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He drapes himself over you like you’re the park bench he’s sleeping on. In fact, he does often fall asleep on you. You can’t get up now. Cat logic.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Being Rover’s partner essentially means you have to make sure he doesn’t get himself hurt or get into any insane shenanigans. So as long as he has the keys to his van, you’re probably fine.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Several dates do consist of dumpster diving and otherwise rummaging through garbage. Even if he has the money to actually shop, he just prefers this. He’s just like this.

“Hey look, I found an old sweater.” Rover held up a sweater with several stains of questionable origin on it. “It would look cute on you.”

With a blush and feelings of concern, you’d stutter, “Maybe…..I think we’d need to wash it first. Several times over.”

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Rover isn’t actually bad at things like cooking or doing laundry, half the time he just chooses not to because he’s fine being a strange trash man. Just remind him to go to the laundromat every now and again.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 He puts little things that remind him of you all over his van. A little figure from a show you like on the dashboard, a bumper sticker, an air freshener…..any little trinket he can collect that he relates to you. He’s kind of a hoarder, honestly.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 The two of you actually painted his van together. It was super fun and sweet, and he was better at painting than you thought!

“Did you have any ideas on what to paint, or….?” You looked at Rover, who was staring at the side of his van with a hand on his chin. For Rover, he seemed weirdly thoughtful.

“Maybe……another van.”

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 There isn’t really a rhyme or reason to why Rover falls in love with you, he just sort of latches on and starts to associate you with home.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Rover has a penchant for things other people might pass over, like food out of the garbage or dollar bills on the ground. So he sees worth in you where other people might not. He honestly doesn’t understand how no one else was with you already, you were so sweet and considerate to even a bum like him. There’s no way he could pass up a diamond in the rough like you.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Since he does mention having a daughter in the rp session, it’s likely that he’s had some sort of past relationship that didn’t end well. As such, he can actually be kind of insecure, as much as he hides it behind a blank expression. Please give this man some extra loving, he needs it.

“I don’t know why you stayed,” he announced suddenly as he laid his head in your lap. “But I’m glad you did. I just feel like I should say that.”

“Why wouldn’t I, though?” You ran your fingers through his messy hair. “I just love you.”

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Speaking of his daughter, you get to see her sometimes! He doesn’t have custody or anything, but he does pick her up from school and take her to dance practice sometimes. I imagine her to be middle school age, since it’s mentioned she likes Robin, who’s a tween idol. Even if she’s kind of embarrassed that she’s getting picked up from school by her smelly dad in his trashy van, she’s still happy to see you two.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 (Especially since you convince Rover to take her to an actual restaurant for dinner instead of dumpster diving.)

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 When you were first introduced to his daughter, she loudly announced how glad she was that her dad finally had someone else in his life, and she was scared that he’d NEVER get a partner again. Poor Rover is covering his face with his hands and insisting she cut it out.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Other people react similarly to your relationship. Robin and [SUE] are fangirling over how cute you two are together, and that Rover secretly has a soft side! How adorable!

“I can’t believe Rover has a [ROMANTIC PARTNER]! You guys are so my [OTP]!”

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 Instead of an engagement ring, he gives you an extra copy of the keys to his van. That’s how you know he trusts you more than anything.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 You know you’re with him for the long haul when he starts referring to it as “our van” instead of “my van”. You truly are stuck with him for life.

[twistedtummies2]

Gathering of the Greatest Gumshoes - Number 5

Welcome to A Gathering of the Greatest Gumshoes! During this month-long event, I’ve been counting down my Top 31 Favorite Fictional Detectives, from movies, television, literature, video games, and more!

We've now reached the Top 5!

SLEUTH-OF-THE-DAY’S QUOTE: “Let’s vote on it: mystery, or pizza pie?”

Number 5 is…Scooby-Doo and the Mystery Inc. Gang.

When it comes to cartoon and comedy detectives, few have lasted as long, or been as prominent in the popular consciousness, as Scooby and his human friends: Fred Jones, Daphne Blake, Velma Dinkley, and perhaps especially Shaggy Rogers. While the Scooby-Doo franchise has gone through many evolutions and changes over the years, the show initially started out as a children’s detective series, with a spooky motif. In “Scooby-Doo, Where Are You?” the gang made up Mystery Inc. – a team of teenaged detectives who rode around in their hippy-style “Mystery Machine” van, and made a hobby out of solving any strange case that came their way. Typically, these cases worked the same way: the gang would find themselves in some strange place, where seemingly supernatural happenings were going down. Witches, ghosts, zombies, vampires, hairy monsters…you name it, they saw it.

Inevitably, of course, these creepy cretins were eventually revealed to be nothing more than common crooks: usually thieving rascals or counterfeiters, who used their haunting hijinks as a way of scaring off potential rivals and avoiding unwanted attention to their TRUE activities. After many a slapstick showdown, the villains would be unmasked, and the methods they used to make the seemingly paranormal activity occur would be revealed: “And they would have gotten away with it, too! If it hadn’t been for those meddling kids and their dog!” While there was a lot of comedy involved, given the cartoon medium – mostly coming from the cowardly (and constantly hungry) antics of Shaggy and Scooby – the characters of Mystery Inc. did ultimately always win, and managed to figure out things based on the clues they spotted throughout the story. So while there was tons of humor and cartoonish goofery, it also did make for some genuinely fun detective work, especially for a largely child-oriented medium.

As time went on, the series began to veer more and more into involving ACTUAL supernatural happenings: series like “Scooby and Scrappy-Doo” and “The 13 Ghosts of Scooby-Doo” weren’t so much about detective work, so much as they were just Shaggy, Scooby, and some other characters dealing with actual ghouls and goblins. If this had been the status quo for the rest of time, I don’t think the Mystery Inc. team would have made the cut. They might have been Honorable Mentions, but nothing more. However, once again, things changed over time; people seemed to want the classic mystery format back, but they also liked seeing the gang deal with real specters on occasion.

I think the first product to really set what has now become the status quo for Scooby-Doo was “Scooby-Doo and the Witch’s Ghost”: that film first had the gang take down a phony phantom, before – in a major plot twist – having to deal with real evil spirits and an actual warlock. Nowadays, that seems to be the typical setup for Scooby-Doo: mixing both real superhuman weirdness with the classic spooky, child-friendly Whodunnit gimmick. And yes, before anyone calls me out, I know that “Zombie Island” came first, and it is awesome. HOWEVER, that one was ALL ABOUT them fighting ACTUAL MONSTERS, so I don’t really think it counts: Scooby-Doo today tends to mix a bit of both together in a lot of their finest outings, and while the cartoon comedy has never been abandoned, it has gone into some serious territory on occasion, as well.

The series has developed the characters more and more over time, and seen them them team-up with various guest detectives and celebrities (such as Batman and the Harlem Globetrotters), and has been reimagined into all sorts of media beyond cartoons, including (mostly bad) theatrical films, video games, and numerous direct-to-video or TV features. It’s been updated and reinvented with new art styles on multiple occasions. But no matter what new voices, faces, or cases the team takes on, these four young crime-busters and their canine companion haven’t finished their drive in the Mystery Machine yet, and it’s safe to say a lot more hilarious hauntings are due in the future.

“Scooby-Dooby-Doo!”

We're nearing the end, people. Tomorrow, the countdown continues with Number 4!

CLUE: “The Weed of Crime Bears Bitter Fruit."

[walnutcookie]

talk about walnuts scooby doo hyperfixation THIS INSTANT /nf (pretyy please)

okay this is actually like . my favorite thing ever thank you for this lucky /gen

ive had a hc for like .. a couple of months now? that walnut has a scooby doo special interest/reoccurring hyperfixation . it probably came on the tv while she was watching cartoons as a kid and she was Entranced by it (almond walked in on her looking at the tv with her eyes wide and sparkly)

first of all she says ZOINKS and JINKIES and JEEPERS in her vocabulary regularly (and almond to a lesser extent. hes watched it so much with walnut and picked it up from her a little and now sometimes when he gets scared he'll let a little ZOINKS out)

if you literally just mention it to her she will EXPLODE with pure joy and happiness and . you will probably be her new favorite pwrson And i like to think roguefort knew this and perhaps one time tried to create a mystery for her that was sort of like one in the show where she got to unmask some villain (she was bouncing up and down with joy)

umumgv i dont really know what else to say Her favorite character is velma and she also probably kins her . and kin assigns every single person she meets. scans them up and down and she already knows which scooby doo character they are. me and my partner joked once about constable whiskers and lord crumbles having kittens and one of them is named lord crumbles the fourth and the rest are shaggy, scooby, velma, daphne and fred (almond gave her naming privileges and she already knew how to answer .) Also she hates scrappy doo

(if you want to adopt this hc i dont mind . i would love to spread my walnut scooby doo fixation propaganda)

[badass-queer-couples-battle]

Preliminaries will start tomorrow and will all be random matches!

I’ll update you on the number of polls later, for now here are the submissions that were disqualified from the poll OR submissions I’m not sure about based on my knowledge of source material! This does not mean couples/ships not mentioned here meet the rules, here are just the ones I can judge based on having knowledge of the media they’re from.

- Lance x Keith from Voltron - *deep sigh* They’re a ship with minimal canon basis. Sorry.

- Roronoa Zero x Black Leg Sanji from One Piece - Idk about this one guys, there’s subtext but it feels very.... queerbaity? Let me know what you think in the comments/send an ask.

- The main 4 from Scooby Doo franchise - Again, very little canon basis but I do love the idea of them as a badass polycule!

- Julian Blackthorn x Emma Carstairs from The Shadowhunter Chronicles/The Dark Artifices - Julian is demisexual but it’s not explicitly referenced in canon, and the author seems to think demisexual = only ever in love with one person/falls for their best friend. I’m demi and that’s just not good rep, sorry, although admittedly they are very badass.

- Vegas x Pete from Kinnporsche - A pretty twisted enemies to lovers situation and don’t really meet the criteria of a ‘battle couple’. They may become one post-canon, but in the show itself spend 95% of the time as enemies.

- Hisoka x Illumi from Hunter x Hunter - While they do meet the criteria of a ‘battle couple’ and are sorta-canon, Hisoka is heavily implied to be a child predator and is creepy as hell overall. Sorry, they won’t be included.

- Monkey D. Luffy x Roronoa Zero from One Piece - Again, canon basis issue.

-  Aoba x Koujaku from Dramatical Murder - this franchise is so uncomfortable and problematic on every level imaginable. Just no.

- Blue x Cyan from Overly Sarcastic Productions - real actual people.

- Miles Morales x Gwen Stacy from Spiderverse/Marvel - Admittedly I’m not familiar with the comics but neither of them seems to be canonically queer. Let me know if I’m wrong.

- Steve x Bucky from the MCU/Captain America movies - accidental subtext or queerbait, depending on your point of view. I bet on the first one, these movies were written by a bunch of the most cishet men in existence.