#OH FUCK I FORGOT HIS FACIAL SCAR-

[laughableillusions]

BOYTOY NAMED DESERTER TROY USED TO LIVE IN CHINA DETROIT

[hoshigray]

𝐎𝐥𝐝 𝐓𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐬, 𝐒𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐓𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐬 | toji fushiguro

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: Your ex-husband bringing the kids over for trick-or-treating is one thing; him wanting to spend the night at your place is another. But it's just for the night. There's no way one night can rekindle some old feelings...right?

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: ex-husband! Toji x fem! reader - explicit content; minors DNI - the reader is around their mid-30s - Tsumiki (age 11) and Megumi (age 9) - mutual pining - kissing/makeout sessions - unprotected sex - Daddy kink - breast sucking + nipple play - fingering (f! receiving) - oral (f! receiving) - spooning + mating press - cervix fucking - breeding kink - praise - clitoral play (pressing and grinding) - pet names (baby, good girl, mama, princess, sweetie, sweet thing) - you and Toji have been divorced for five years - cameos: Gojo, Utahime and Mei Mei - mention of drool/spit and tears - humor bc I'm [not] funny.

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7.6k (....dawg.)

𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: happy Halloween, everyone!! so, randomly missed writing ex-husband! toji bc it's lowkey my favorite, soooo yeah, this is what we're doing to celebrate the end of the month! anywho, happy October, beautiful ppl, and tysm for reading my works!! Alsooo, ty for 2.8k!!!

“Trick-or-treat!!”

“Gasp—Oh my goodness!” 

“We came to celebrate Halloween! Also, Megumi forgot his toothbrush here again.”

Opening your door to children at the sunset of Halloween day isn’t out of the ordinary or anything special. However, it’s always a pleasant surprise when it’s two kids you hold dear to your heart. You greet them with a hug, two siblings you know too well to say you’re acquainted with. If anything, you’re practically family. 

The raven-haired brother, referred to as Megumi, speaks up. “It’s not my fault! Dad was rushing me last time.”

“Because you had to bring your stuffed animals last time, holding us back for your baseball practice.” Tsumiki, the older sister, snapped back. The two argue amongst themselves in front of you as you try to mediate. It’s no avail until another voice comes to the fray.

“All right, chill out, you two.” The voice belonged to the person approaching the porch stairs, your eyesight capturing the familiar figure walking up with two duffle bags. The one standing tall before you was the father of the children, Toji Fushiguro. Who’s also known as your one and only former husband. “Get inside and finish y’r homework, or else we’re goin’ back home.” 

The siblings stop bickering and head inside, taking off their shoes at the foyer and walking upstairs. Now that they’re gone, you turn to the man with the jet-black hair, his viridian orbs focused on you. The weather was chilly, so the man wore his usual dark denim jacket over his plain black sweatshirt, matching his jeans. “You look good, big guy. What’s in the bags?”

He greets you with a curled lip, and the scar on the side of his lip lifts. “Picked them up from their after-school sports, so it’s their sports gear and costumes for tonight. Mind helpin’ me here?” 

“Hmmm,” you merge your facial expressions to that of faux pondering, turning your back to Toji. “Nah, can’t. Got dinner to finish making.”

“Hmph, should’ve known.” He makes his way through between you and the front door. “Wouldn’t wanna break your pretty nails carrying heavy shit, huh, princess?” 

You glare at him using the nickname, hating his patronizing gaze. “From what I remembered, you would never let me carry the heavy stuff because you thought I was too fragile and easy to break. So how about that, Mr. Knight in Shining Armor?”

“Really? I don’t remember sayin’ all that before. You must’ve put me in a spell.” 

“Probably, I’ve been told I’m quite cute~.”

“Mmm, nah, more like an old hag of a witch.” Toji barks a laugh at your offended reaction, and he immediately ducks and heads for the stairs when you throw a sandal at him.

“At the very least, say I’m a cute witch, fucker.” You say the final word under your breath, grabbing the sandal you threw and heading back to the kitchen.

To say you and Toji were acquainted with one another would be the biggest understatement of the century. The two of you met a decade ago, fell madly in love, and married within a year of the relationship. When you tied the knot, Tsumiki had to have been two years old, and Megumi just turned one year old. You two had been together for four years after that, and you could confidently say those were one of [if not THE] best years of your life. You often second-guessed yourself being in a relationship with someone who had children, fearing that they wouldn’t like you or ignore you.

However, those worries were blown right away as the days went by. Every time you spent time with the children brought you three closer than ever; it was to the point that they saw you as their mother. How sweet! And there’s no denying that Toji loved you. The man would break someone’s nose for you  — yes, it happened before, and it wasn’t pretty — for you were his sweet little thing that kept him going.  

Well, if it was so great, why the divorce? Let’s just say you weren’t Toji’s first love. That title would have to be awarded to the Megumi’s mother. Even in her unfortunate passing, you can tell that Toji loved that woman like no other. It didn’t make you jealous or anything, seeing the man you love still mourn for a dead woman. Hell, you’d probably do the same if you were him. But, you can’t lie; it felt like you were cast over a “shadow” when it came to her influence. It was damn near suffocating to bear, especially in those four years of marriage. So, for your sake and his aching heart, you pulled him aside and suggested a divorce. And Toji didn’t fight you on the proposition, signing the papers and setting you free from the thick air.

Although things ended between you two, that didn’t mean things stopped being what they were. If anything, it was as if nothing happened at all. Even if you still don’t live under the same roof, you still make time to hang with the Fushiguros, whether invited to some occasion or exchange phone calls or texts to check up on them. Even now, five years after your separation, it warms your heart knowing that you get to interact with the people you care about. 

There are moments you find yourself missing living under the same roof with all three of them and living alone can be pretty lonely. But all in all, as long as they’re comfortable and trust you enough to be around, there’s no need to change things up again. Like right now — the four of you sit at the dinner table eating before the kids go off trick-or-treating.

“Are you going to trick-or-treat with us, Y/n?” The brown-haired child sitting next to you asks while finishing up her dinner. 

“Sorry, not this time, gotta be at a Zoom meeting for my job in a few minutes. But I do have someone else to take my place. Gojo will be here at around—Why are you two making that face?” You stop mid-sentence to notice Megumi and Toji at the other side of the table, displaying disgusted facial expressions at the mention of the white-haired other’s name.

“Why him?” They said in unison.

“Why not??” You question their irritation.

“He’s so annoying…” Again, in unison. Proof enough that they’re father and son.

You sigh as you get up to take your plate to the sink. “Oh, come on, you two, it’s not like he’ll be with you guys the entire night. He has a party at a friend’s he’s going to later.” 

“Isn’t he too old to trick-or-treat?” Tsumiki questions, noting that Gojo is way past his undergraduate years. 

“He is, but whatever gets that prick any free sweets,” Toji answers his daughter before getting up to put his dish in the sink. 

You exit the kitchen, head into the living room, and sit on the couch. The laptop you had placed there was ready to open and unlock, and you clicked on applications and windows to look through before your meeting started in the next three to two minutes. He should be here about—

DING-DONG!!

Now.

Right on cue, you motion for Toji to grab the front door, and he follows your command. “Kids, Gojo’s here!” You shout out to the two kids who still sit at the table. “When you’re done eating, you can go upstairs and put your costumes on. But whoever finishes last has to do the dishes.” You can hear commotion from the table as the brunette rushes to put her dish in the sink and dash for the stairs. Megumi groans to himself; you giggle when you hear him mutter an “Aww man…”

You pull out your headphones to connect to your laptop, put them in their respective ears, and prepare yourself for the meeting. Ignoring the faint passive-aggressive tones of your ex-husband when greeting Gojo at the door…

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

Your eyes flutter open, noticing the lighting change around the living room. The orange sunlight no longer decorated the space, substituted with the gradual darkness that overtakes you. The only source of light you can figure out is the flashing from the television screen.

Aside from the TV, there are no other signs of life. There aren’t any signs of Tsumiki or Megumi around playing or causing a raucous. It could only mean the two are still trick-or-treating with Gojo. 

One blink, two blinks. I must’ve fallen asleep after the meeting… You hum while sinking to the couch, burying your face into the pillow. 

But…since when did your pillow act like it was breathing with a heartbeat? And…I smelt that cologne before…How?

“Ya awake now?”

You raise your head, realizing you are not lying on your couch. Technically, you were; however, you were lying on something else on the furniture with you – more like someone. 

It’s then you realize that you were lying on Toji during your entire slumber, him leaning on the end of the couch, one leg spread to make room for you to sleep on him while you sit on the other. And you can guess that you had your head on his chest, snuggling up to his warm figure. He looks at you with his green eyes now darkened by the room, yet you can see their glow from the television light. And that small smile he gives you, the scar on the right side of his lip lifted upward. The familiar butterflies in your stomach flutter like before. Like old times sake…That must be embarrassing, huh?

You frantically try to get off of him, “Sorry about that, I thought—“

“No, no,” Toji places a stern hand on your back, keeping you from moving further. “You were comfortable.” 

You stare at him for a few seconds until your face contours to a look, and a smile starts to creep up while you situate yourself back to your original position, pressing your face back on his chest to listen to the beats of his heart again. “I recall having this couch all to myself not too long ago, so where’d you come from?”

“Well, I wanted to watch some sports highlights, but I figured you’d kick my ass if I pulled you off and had you sleep on the floor instead.” With the click of your tongue, he chortles. You bet your ass I would. “So, I decided to have ya sleep on me while I watch TV.”

“What’s wrong with the other side of the couch? It’s quite vacant and enough for a big guy like you.” 

“True,” his hand rubs circles on your back, an old habit he did when he used to have you like this. “But then I’d be lonely.” 

You titter. “That’s big for someone who said he thrives on being alone.”

“I thrive being alone when I’m working.” You’re glad he can’t see your eyes roll; he’d probably grab you by the cheeks like a child. “Besides, why would I wanna be alone when I have you for myself.”

And there it is, your cheeks begin to warm up. Or was it because you’re so close to him that his heat is transferring to you? That’s probably it, yeah. Let’s change the subject…”How long was I out for? I remember the kids left around 7:30-ish.”

“Mmm, it’s going to eleven right now.”

Three and a half hours? Damn. “It’s past their bedtime.”

Toji scoffs. The abrupt motion of his chest rising is satisfying in a way that makes you even more comfortable. “You still think they’re gonna sleep with all that sweet shit they got?” He snickers some more as you shake your head.

“They know better. When you guys get home, be sure to put their candy bags on the top shelf of the closet for the morning.” 

“Still traumatized from that one time?” 

“Uhhh, yes??” The memory flashes to you for a quick moment, but the dread from before still haunts you. Megumi was six years old and Tsumiki seven, returning home from trick-or-treating and immediately tasting their labor from that night. However, what you didn’t expect was for them both to eat almost half their bags. Let’s just say, thanks to their sugar rushes, they didn’t drop dead until the hour hand touched two of the morning. “Unless it’s the weekend, never again.”

The way the older man chuckles is so therapeutic — it nearly makes you want to fall asleep again. “You weren’t the one chasin' Megumi all over the place tryin' to get him to sleep. Little squirt gets his speed from me.”

“Awww, poor you~” You can sense the glare as you respond in a condescending, sing-song tune. “You and him are always butting heads. Like father, like son.”

“Tch, hate that sayin’ so fuckin’ much.”

“Why? ‘Because it’s true?”

“Shut up.” The hand he used to rest his head comes down to pinch your nose. You wriggle out of his hold with giggles, but he happily keeps you grounded to him with his stronghold and a leg wrapped around to prevent yours from moving. “He only listens to you. Such a sweet lil’ baby to you, huh? Puttin’ my own son against me.”

More giggles prompt out of tiny guilt, and you bring up a hand to rub on his chest. “He’s such a bright boy now. Growing up so big and fast.”

“Miki, too. That girl is way too smart fr' me to catch up. And she’s becoming so kind and strong, crazy to think she made me play teacups when she could barely go down the stairs by herself.” Toji hums, the vibrations felt on the pads of your fingers. “Think she gets that from you.” 

You shook your head. “They’re your babies. They do amazing things because they have a big guy like you to catch them if they ever fall.”

“Hmm, fair…But let’s not pretend I’m the best dad in the world. Fuck, never in my life did I think I’d be a dad, especially with two kids. I didn’t know shit back then — still! I still don’t know shit.” You don’t say anything, just listening to him voice his thoughts to you. Because he knows you’d listen – you always do. “If you weren’t there for them, I don’t think they’d be shining like this. Y’re definitely the thing that brought us up together. They look up to you so much. Ya did so well with them.”

Nodding aimlessly, his black sweatshirt grazing on your cheek. “Thank you. Same to you. Didn’t do so bad yourself, big guy.”

“Mmm.”

Nothing is said between you two after that. The only thing that makes noise is the voices coming from the television. The volume lowered, an initiative you could guess from Toji wanting you to get some rest. The silence was too awkward that it might torture some, but it was fine where it was. There was no need to change it, especially when you were comfortable in each other’s embrace.

That is, until Toji asks, “Do you miss it?” The rubs on your back go slower, his fingertips drawing a ticklish sensation.

“Of course I do. All the time.” You answer honestly, turning your head to rest your chin on him. Your eyes glimpse directly at his, giving him a tiny grin. “Why ask? I know the kids miss me being around; what about you? Miss me nagging and putting you to work all the time?”

He sneers at your comment. “Every day.”

It was such a simple answer, yet it had the power to wipe that smirk right off your face. Your eyes locked in his sight, and your heart tuning to an irregular rhythm. Oh, come on, Y/n, get a grip! “Ahem—Toji, I hope you know that I never stopped missing everything we had — I never will. Those years that we shared were probably the best I’ve had. We had happy moments, others sad, of course. But, God, do I miss it all. I miss it so much. I miss having you guys here. Miki and Gumi and—“

“Me?” Good Lord, if this man doesn’t stop looking at you with those goddamn eyes of his, such captivating orbs that say more than he lets on. Your breath hitches, and so does the hand on your back. “Hmm? Ya miss me, baby?”

Oh, for fuck’s sake. Why’d you have to call me that? And it gets worse when he places his free hand on your cheek, his thumb brushing your skin while the forefinger teases the lobe and tragus of your ear. Goddammnit…

“...Yes,” your voice was down a whisper, which could easily be mistaken with the television. But you know Toji heard you, loud and clear. “Especially you, Toji.” You said it. The words that he wanted to hear from you. They felt so forbidden to say, yet it was the truth. You avert your gaze away from him. But you knew that wouldn’t work, not right now. Toji taps your cheek with his thumb, and your eyes sheepishly return to his.

He doesn’t say anything, and that makes your heart beat at an unbearable rate. It’s all you can hear when you stare into his deep emerald eyes, the sound of it ringing your eardrums as if you could puke. Your throat running dry, so you gulp to ease the uncomfortable bob. If something could just happen to end this anxious torture, that would be great. 

And then your prayers get answered: something does happen. Toji slowly brings his face closer to yours — your body goes rigid, and you instantly face away before the inevitable happens. No, I didn’t mean that!

“Aht aht, don’t do that, baby.” His hand slithers from your cheek to your chin, forcing you to face straight at him. “Lemme see you.”

“Toji, wait,” your voice travels out in a shaky breath. “We shouldn’t be doing this. We can’t cross this line anymore.”

He listens to your pleas, but his body does otherwise. Placing a gentle kiss on your forehead while the hand on your back snakes downward. “Why not?” His gruff voice dialed down to a whisper.

“Because—Mmmm…” Toji interrupts you by licking the helix of your ear. Oh, you slick bastard. “We’re supposed to be done…” 

“That’s not stoppin’ me from takin’ care of my sweet thing.” Jesus Christ, you almost melted from the way he whispered that to your ear. He’s pulling out all the same old tricks, and it gets more hellish by the second as you try not to give in. “So, y're gonna let me take care of you like I always do, right, mama?”

Both his hands now rest on your ass, groping it while your hips sway as if they have a mind of their own. The leg between yours comes up slightly, making you ride on it. The heat on your cheeks has already blossomed to your ears, making it hard to think straight. Gripping his sweatshirt, your hips ride his thigh to ease the throbbing sensation that grows with every motion. Good God, you shouldn’t be doing this. You know you shouldn’t be doing this. However, it’s been so long that you felt wanted like this — wanted by him. It’s all the same – his voice, his hands, his words, his body, and the names he calls – yet here you are turning into putty. 

“Haaahh, Mmmfff…Toji, please,” Toji withdraws his face from your shoulder, leaving him to examine your expression. You must look so dumb right now, with your hooded eyes and shivering lips. But, at this point, do you even care? “Please…Treat me right.”

One moment, you see his gaze narrow with a devious glint. Next, you’re taken aback when Toji slams his lips on yours, kissing and sucking your bottom lip until you give him access. With a moan, you open your mouth for him and sink deeper into the kiss. Your hands come around his neck, keeping him focused on you and you alone. Not that he would have it any other way.

His strong hands continue to knead your asscheeks while you hump and grind on his thigh. Nibbling on your lip, you whimper helplessly for him. It strokes his ego, knowing he’s making you like this, the fucking bastard. He takes in your tiny cries happily, shoving his tongue to play with yours. You give in to him, almost losing your balance riding his thigh, yet Toji’s lips never leave yours.

You break the kiss to get an imperative breath, panting loudly and sweetly for him as Toji kisses and licks your ear. The sounds make your lower region twitch. “Hnnmm, fuck…That’s my girl. So fuckin’ good fr’ me always, Y/n…” You can feel him slide a hand up to the hem of your leggings, forcing it inside for his thick fingers to brush up on the bare flesh of your butt. You gasp sharply. Him squeezing your butt has you biting down on his sweatshirt. “—Hahhh, Oh God, Toji,” With every squeeze, he inches closer to your panty-covered chasm, where you know he’d find a damp spot. Please touch me. Please, please, plea—

CLACK-CLINK!!

The two of you are frozen stiff when you hear the sound of the door opening and closing, the foyer lights turned on. “Alright~, we got you guys home. See ya later!” That was Gojo’s voice, indicating everyone was finally back from trick-or-treating. This means that Tsumiki and Megumi are about to see you on top of their father, his hand in your leggings and smacking lips with yours. Your eyes shoot wide with horror — immediately remove yourself from Toji and stand up from the couch to pull your bottoms up. You barely had the chance to peek at Toji because the kids already run to the living room to find you two.

“Y/n, Y/n, look!” The brunette was the first to greet you with her adorable pink Barbie cowgirl costume. She and her brother, dressed as Sasuke Uchiha, cheerfully showcased their pillowcases full of candy. “Look at all this candy we got!”

“Wooow, you guys really went on a haul,” you can only hope they can’t see you sweating bullets through your fake reaction. “Wh–Where’s Gojo?” 

“He dropped us off here a few seconds ago and left for the party,” The raven-haired boy answered while scanning his pillowcase.

You only nod along until you frantically wipe your mouth, realizing the tiny trail of spit from the corner of your mouth. “Umm—Ahem, well then, I’m glad you two got all that candy. Now, let’s hurry up and get you guys home so you can get ready for school tomorrow!” 

But the children didn’t move an inch. Actually, they looked like they were going to tell you something. You lift a brow. Oh no, they’re going to look at each other. They looked at each other and then glanced back at you. Oh, God, no. “Uhhh, Y/n, we were thinking.” Big sister Tsumiki is always the one who asks the following question. “Can we stay over?”

You inhale a massive breath, yet you do your best not to exhale a heavy sigh. “Kids, you promised to keep the overnight stays to three at max per month. This will be the fifth!” 

“Yeah, but it’s dark out. Plus, it’s way past our bedtime.” The younger chimes in with a tiny pout. “We’ll be asleep by the time Dad gets us home.”

And here comes Tsumiki with the tag-team response to add on. “And that means he’ll have to make continuous trips back and forth from the car. Picking me and Megumi up, getting our bookbags, the bags full of candy, the whole thing! We already packed up our PJs just in case.” 

You stood there staring at the two in astonishment. There’s no way they thoroughly planned this out. There’s just no way… And to make it worse, they were making valid arguments. You open your mouth to say something, but the two give the best puppy eyes they can. The wave of guilt hits like a train, internally cringing. You turn to Toji, who still sits on the couch, and the motherfucker only gives you a shrug. Wow, what a helpful father he is.

You groan into your hands, shaking your head while looking at the kids who wait for your verdict. “…Alright, you can stay as long as you PROMISE to put those candy bags in my bedroom closet. Deal?” The happy smiles and aggressive head shakes should answer your question. “Good, now go ahead and take your showers before you head for bed.” They rushed to the stairs by the time you finished that sentence, so enthusiastic about staying the night at your house, and you can’t help but smile hearing their footsteps run up the stairs. 

With that being said, you turn to the older man again. Your brows are trenched down, but your smile is still present. “So, you legit just sat there and let those two tag-team me like that? In my own house?”

Another shrug with a dumb smirk on his handsome face. “Told you: too smart fr’ me to catch up.” You shake your head before exiting to get the kids and guest rooms ready, leaving him with the television. 

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

The midnight hour has finally danced its way into the darkness of the night. Halloween is finally over, and the month of October is no more. The pitter-patter sound of the rain cleanses the neighborhood of its merits and festivities that partook hours ago, ready for a new phase of the year to take over.

After having the guest room ready with sheets and sleepwear for Toji and kissing the kids goodnight, you rinse your stress off with a nice shower and put on your pajamas to get ready for bed. After you turn the lights off, you drape the comforter over your figure as your body sinks with the cozy sheets and pillowcase. Your eyes close while focusing on the curtains of your window, the only light piercing inside being the lampposts by the street. 

…Well, at least that’s what’s supposed to happen. But that’s not the case because you’re not the only one lying comfortably on your mattress. Instead, Toji is here with you, in your room, on your bed, his chest to your back, and his hand roaming inside your oversized shirt. Your lips are now connected with his, sharing your erotic moans with his enticing groans, and you get a little louder as his fingers cup and play with your breast.

“Mmphh…Ahhhh, I thought I told you you’re sleeping in the guest room—Nmmff!” He tweezes your nipple with his forefinger and thumb roughly.  

“And I thought you’d be smart enough to know that wasn’t gonna happen.” Toji kisses the crook of your neck, drawing near your ear for him to whisper. “Besides, look at you. Still sleepin’ with no underwear on?”

“Hmph, only when I have a man around the house.” That answer got you another rough tweak on your nip and a purposeful gnaw to your ear. You knew he’d react like that, never liking the mention of another man leaving your mouth – especially during an intimate time like this.

“That so? What man you know that can handle all this?” Toji then moves from his side to be between your legs, pulling up your shirt to fully expose your chest. And your breathe hitches while his free hand travels down your abdomen to your bottoms.

“Ahhhh, no one. Just you...” You look at him with half-lidded eyes, taking in his reaction to what you said. The salacious grin on his face becoming broader should entail that he greatly loved that retort.

He brings his face to your other unattended nipple, “Good answer, princess.” The nub of your breast enters his mouth, and the wet warmth of his tongue greets it with lapped motions and grazes from his teeth. Despite that, it doesn’t distract you from the fact your bottoms are pulled down with ease and are thrown to the bedroom floor, leaving your cunt out for him, your erotic fluids seeping and glistening from the outside lights. 

Toji plays with your folds until he can stuff his pointer finger into your chasm, the insertion resulting in your body’s jolt. It’s been a long while since you had his thick digit inside you, playing and scraping the inner walls to evoke whimpers. God, it felt so good, this satisfying feeling returning to awaken your body to his touch. He interacts with your body as if he’s the only person who knows how to get you going – and it’s the truth. No one can put you in a blissful haze quicker than this man. And you’d prefer to keep it that way. 

The addition of his middle finger into your leaky entrance startles you, the thick digit making its way in with such vigor that he uses both fingers to scrape the velvety texture of your walls. Your eyes are now screwed shut at the growing commotion between your thighs, and the heat within your body flourishing all around gets to your head. “—Khmm, Oh fuuck, Toji. Please, don’t stop.” 

With a soft ‘pop’ noise from his lips, Toji replies to your demands. “I’m sorry, what’s my name again?” You giggle with trenched brows. Of course, how could I forget?

“Nmmph, D-Daddy, pleaseee, I’m so clo—Ahhhann!!” He puts his thumb to your clit, grinding down on it unexpectedly. “I wanna cum, pleaseee…”

“Hmmm, good girl,” he teased, laying down kisses, nibbling on the skin of your stomach and inner thighs until he arrives at your leaking slit. Your body jerks up from the bed when you feel the cold, wet muscle slowly lick on your clitoris before ravaging your folds. The sounds of his mouth on your cunt are so lewd to the ear, slurping noises from his lips with the lapping motions of his tongue claiming your come are too much for you. And when he uses his hand to swipe and pinch your clit? Oh, it’s a wrap. Your release comes out without control, biting down on your bottom lip to make sure your cries don’t leave this space for the kids to hear. Their room is on the other side down the hall; tonight isn’t the night for too many risks.

When your trembling body calms down and subsides, Toji withdraws his face from between your thighs. Your essence paints his mouth, and he wipes his chin clean while licking the remnants that coat his scarred lips. “Hmph, missed tastin’ you like that.” You open your eyes when your high finally evades you, watching your ex-husband pull down his sweats. His erection springs out and hits his stomach, your mind going rampant with thoughts as you ogle at his freed limb. Shit, it’s been so long. Will that shit even fit me again?

“Don’t think it’ll fit, baby?” Damn him, he loves teasing you. Toji then discards his black wife-beater, at long last revealing his well-built, brawny physique that has you drooling for him. He uses his hands to maneuver your legs—your knees pushed to your chest as your legs propped up on his shoulders. A position you’re all too familiar with. Your eyes don’t leave Toji’s cock as he aligns his cock to your slick-coated folds. “Take some breaths fr’ me, sweetie. Can’t take care of you when you’re all tense.”

You take up on his advice and begin taking deep breaths, reminding yourself to maintain the steady pattern as he pushes the tip of his dick between the lips of your cunt. Every inhale is where he nudges into the hole of your inner cavern, and every exhale gives you time to breathe out the pain that comes in for a split second. This carries on until the cockhead wedges itself perfectly into your vagina, along with the inches of his girth that stretches until the base kisses your lips, the tip of him kissing your cervix. Tears swell up in your eyes, taking more deep breaths to prepare yourself for what’s about to come. 

“Oooh fuuuck…Heh, yeah, that’s my baby right there. Fittin’ so perfect fr’ me, mama…” He puts his weight on you, keeping your figure unmoving under his bow. 

“Nmmmf, Daddyyy,” you’re forced to take in all of him, and drool trails down your lips with no hope of taking care of it. “…I’m so full, you’re too much…”

“I know, sweetie, I know.” He wipes your spit after kissing your forehead. How gentle compared to what you’re about to go through. “Gonna move now.” His thrusts start slow for the two of you to adjust to each other; the feeling of his length’s veins coming in and out of your chasm is so euphoric, and the kisses to your cervix want your body to writhe and squirm. But you’re bent into this position for a reason: forced to submit to him no matter what. So you do just that.

Yet your horny haze gets more potent once he picks up the pace, rutting into you with increased speed. Your slit, still sensitive from earlier, gets overstimulated with the constant grazes on your gummy walls and jabs to your tender cervix. It takes everything in your power not to come so early.

“—Hahhhh, Nmmph. Oh, shit, shit, shit…” Toji groans above you, the thrusts of his pelvis increase to an irregular rhythm, grinding deep into your cunt to the point of uncontrollable babbles escaping your lips. His bullying on your insides results in you gripping his length hard, causing the older man to hiss and moan at your contractions. “—Ohhhfuuuckk!! Jesus Christ, baby. Y’re gonna make me go crazy.” 

As if that wasn’t already happening now that he pistons his cock into your wetness, your brain turning into mush from the onslaught of ruts to your puffy wet chasm. Tears stream down your face, and more drool follows down with more precise hits to your delicate canal. The pounding in your head makes it hard to think of anything else, the squelching noises and paps of Toji’s balls hitting your cunt making it worse. 

“D-Daddyyy, I’m—Ohoooo!! Oh, Jesus, ohhhshit!” You can’t formulate a proper sentence, too engulfed with the electrifying sensations coursing through your body. 

“Damn, you feel too fucking good—Hnngh!!” Toji places his forehead on yours, resting his entire weight on you while his hips have a mind of their own. “‘Bout to make me knock you up…”

Oh, good Lord. The mere thought of having a child is the last thing that should be on your mind. But in a time like this, who in their right mind would be thinking straight? “Nnnfff! Oh God, pleaseee, fill me up, Daddyy!” Green eyes narrow with trenched brows. “—Pleasepleasepleaseee!! I want you to fill me up so bad, I want it, I want—Hyaaaaa!!” 

How can he deny your desperate, teary pleas when you’re urging him on like this? “Heh, you’re so fuckin’ sexy, mama.” Toji captures your lips with his, your mewls taken by him as you sink further into your pleasurable thrill.

Sporadic thrusts of his pelvis produce more raunchy noises in the joining of your sexes, his heavy balls smacking on your cunt as he drives the base of his cock straight into you. Your slit is now a puffy mess, come and slick form a soapy mess that Toji now harbors a milky ring around his girth. A few rushed, sloppy thrusts heighten your high once more, and then Toji presses his pelvis down to the hilt on one final, harsh thrust, unloading his seed into your aching folds. And your climax follows in a few seconds, the walls of your cunt fluttering on his pulsating dick as your essence soaks him. Your muffled shrieks are received by him, quivering under him until the aftershocks wash through your body. 

Once you two breathe at a steady tempo and the nerves of your sweaty bodies fall still, the kiss is broken with heavy pants and a string of spit that links you two together. Toji buries his face between your neck and shoulder, licking and kissing your skin as you’re allowed time to experience your clarity.

“Hmmm…You know I’m not done yet, princess.” Toji mumbles to your ear before stationing your legs off his shoulders for them to rest.

“Yeah, I know, big guy.” You tease him with a breathless laugh, kissing him on the temple. “Always wanting more…”

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

“…So, you’re telling me you had your ex-husband spend the night? Not just the kids?”

“Yup, that’s what happened.” 

This morning was different from your usual routine – well, you can’t say it’s different if you have done it before, huh? After five years of divorce, you thought you’d be so used to waking up and getting ready for work without worrying about others. However, this morning proves otherwise.

It felt natural walking into the kids’ room and lightly shaking them awake, telling them to get ready while you whip up something quick for them to eat as Toji showers (using your bathroom, by the way). Watching the kids run down the stairs and eat breakfast puts a smile on your face, reminiscing about the good old days when they were younger and teenier. It sometimes feels surreal doing the same thing for them now that they’re getting older and taller. But seeing them bicker and interact with each other in your presence never fails to warm your heart.

When Toji’s finished freshening up and loading his kids’ stuff in his truck, it’s time to bid them farewell for their departure for school. You give them final touch-ups on their hair and outfits, reminding them to be safe and not get into trouble (especially Megumi, now that the boy’s been getting into fights). And before they rush to the car, you hug them and give each a kiss on the cheek. Here is where the warm feeling inside your heart begins to deteriorate, not wanting to let them go. Yet, for their sake – and education – you release them and hope for the best.

The last to leave was Toji, who came from the kitchen to the front door with a paper plate wrapped in foil in one hand. His name is written boldly by a black Sharpie. “This fr' me?” 

“No, it’s for Shiu Kong, for dealing with you all the time.” You stick your tongue out at Toji as he glares at you, not even moving out of the way while he exits through the door. “You better eat that when you get to work, you have a terrible habit of skipping lunch.” 

“Whatever ya say, mom.” He pesters you with the title, knowing you’re technically not a mother anymore. Yet it only makes you smile knowing he notices your maternal side. 

“Don’t forget to text me when Tsumiki’s soccer game is next week.” You watch him go down the porch stairs. 

“Will do.”He whistles. 

“And Toji?”

The man stops walking to turn to you, his forest green eyes fixed on you so quickly that you almost forget what you want to say. Or what you wanted to do. You place your fingers on your lips and blow a kiss with an outward gesture. It was an old habit you did whenever he left, something you can’t seem to get out of practice with. It’s embroidered in your mind at this point. 

And when he catches the kiss with his free hand and places it on his chest, it makes your heart skip a beat. Toji grins, “I’ll be damned if that was fr' Shiu, too.”

You snicker with a shaken head. “Drive safe, Toji.” Closing the front door, you stand there for a while. Your smile doesn’t falter; it gets bigger as you replay the moment instead. Thinking about him, hearing him, seeing him, it all drives you crazy. And that’s a good thing…right?

“I don’t know, sounds like you still kinda care about the guy.” 

“Of course I do,” So here you are, sitting in your living room enjoying the rays of the sunset decorating the space, in a video call with your best friends, Utahime and Mei Mei. You reply to the former’s comment. “Just because I don’t have the ring on my finger doesn’t mean I shouldn’t care about him. I mean, he’s the father of two lovely children.”

“Shoot, you’re better than me, then.” The dark-haired woman admits. “But you’re kinda proving my point, Y/n. Even when you don’t have the ring on, you two act like the same old couple, and it’s definitely not just for the kids’ sake. Let’s be real here.” 

You try to interject, but the pale-blue-haired other, Mei Mei, intervenes, “I agree. It’s one thing if you let the children stay over, but he also wanted to spend the night. Sure, he could’ve been tired from driving all day and such. However, if you’re still seeing a man for the last five years – while legally unbound – and he says he wants to spend the night under your roof, which is rare, that should ring some bells at least.”

“I know, it did…” you nod along with what your friend is saying, throwing your head back with a heavy sigh. “But it’s not like he’s never spent the night here before, nor is he banished from stepping inside.” 

“Oh? Then why is this time different from the others?”

Utahime jumps in after Mei Mei’s chirp. “Yeah, you’re telling us about all these nostalgic lovey-dovey feelings as if you’re falling in love with him all over again. What, did you two have sex or something?” 

An open mouth, yet no words come out, leaving you in a predicament. You could’ve just lied or swerved the subject to something else. But you didn’t. And the two women on the screen lift their brows with hooded eyes, a look meaning a thousand words. You couldn’t even explain yourself either because a sudden knock on your door captured the attention of all three of you. 

You stand up and walk towards the door, your friends still on call on the phone at hand. Opening the door, you’re almost stunned to see in front of you. Tsumiki and Megumi with nervous smiles, and their father at the car collecting the same duffles bags from last night. You’re kidding.

“Hey, kids.” The two of them gulped from not calling them by their names. You bring up the phone to face the screen to them. “Say hello to Auntie Mei Mei and Utahime.” The women on the line smile and wave at the children, who sheepishly wave back.

“Hi, aunties.” Megumi greets them, and then his eyes drift back to you. “So, Y/n—“

“What did you forget this time?” Straight to the point, no room for excuses.

“It was Miki this time! She forgot her soccer cleats.” The older sibling gawks at her younger brother for calling her out.

“Tsumiki, I know you have cleats at home.”

“I do, but these are special! You bought them for my birthday, and I’ve been wearing them to every game ever since! So, I was scared when I couldn’t find them at home.” The brunette was quick to defend her stand. “Also, Dad doesn’t feel like driving up here and then back. So…can we…”

You close your eyes and bring the phone to your face to shield your vexation. Twice in a row, the sixth time this month. You can hear the giggles of your friends from the other side of the phone, adding more fuel to the fire. You don’t look up until you hear heavy footsteps on the porch, seeing Toji holding both duffle bags with a hand and shoulder. He stares at you as you stare at him, a silent conversation on how to handle this situation. And when he shrugs with lifted brows, you realize it’s no use and release the long-awaited sigh.

“….If I see one more thing being left behind here, you guys can’t come back till December, understand?” It wasn’t anything serious, but enough for the kids to know you weren’t joking. They nod their heads in unison while you roll your eyes. “Okay, get in here.” They rushed inside with gleeful laughs, the shuffling of their backpacks following along with them. Your eyes then drift to Toji as he walks up to you. “Did you forget something here, too?”

“Yeah,” you lift a brow when he drops Megumi’s bag to the floor. Before you can register his hand on your chin, you squeak when he brings his lips to yours. It lasted for seconds, but the kiss was sweet and tender, sucking on your lip before letting go with a playful bite. “Meant to give you that when you woke up. Thanks fr' the food, mama.” 

Toji picks the bag up and walks inside your home to put the bags in the rooms, leaving you standing on the porch with an astounded expression. You couldn’t appropriately calibrate your thoughts until you heard faint laughs from the phone. Then, you realize your best friends witnessed the entire scene that transpired. 

Utahime, with the slyest leer, was the first to say something. “Oh yeah, he laid that pipe on you good, without a doubt.”

“Mhmm,” Mei Mei agrees with a chuckle. “And I'm guessing he’s gonna do it again tonight. Isn’t that right, Y/n?”

You end the video call with a heated face. “Sh-Shut your damn mouths!!” Again, you groan into your hands before returning inside. Thank God I still have those birth control pills...

♱ 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2023 – reblogs + comments are appreciated wholeheartedly ☆ header art by rororogi mogera + dividers by the amazing @/cafekitsune!!

[whereishoney]

i like my scars grey

the promised scars from august. not very consistent because i was still figuring out how to draw his damnnn face!! but that's okay

another scar (also shirtless so beware?) under cut

this one is actually a bit older by a few days but i forgot his scars so.. he goes here. sorry scar. for forgetting your namesake. the first one also is missing a couple of the scars i added to the scarland one but its coz i added those on the fly thinking, man, scar needs more scars, dun' 'e... he does... so pretend he has some lines on his hand and arm and smth

anyway you can see the colours are a teeeny bit different, i ended up liking the top ones more because the bottom ones, while good, could get overwhelming and very orange? at least on my monitor. and also the eye colour is tooooo much imo. though i do like his facial hair more now that i look at it.. i mean it was very much intended as like a, ohh just woke uppp, late morninggg kind of moment yaknow. not that you can see that from the crop but i can see it

now colour, speaking of, oh my fucking days, everything looks SO DFIFFERENT ON MY PHONE THAN ON MY COMPUTER. IT'S SO ANNOYING i don't know what's real.. or what people see. pensive emoji

the reason i'm posting these is to fill up my scar portfolio lmao here he is!! i'm learning him and getting to a place where i'm happy with him, yes indeed

a lot of my art recently has just been this kind of stuff but yaknow im practising i wont be ashamed

emjoyy

[vesemirsexual]

What is even more disappointing about how game!Ciri is written is that CDPR Can give us compelling and complex “ trauma and grief can cause you to repeat the cycle of violence” arcs for characters like Syanna and Lambert but apparently completely forgot what a huge part of Ciri’s character that is

the first time I played I thought she got amnesia as well because of how much of her fiery temper was toned down, and how her trauma is hardly mentioned ( and it's not like the characters in this game trauma are completely ignored it is talked about in some quests) I wanna see what she really would have done had she seen Emhyr again

I feel like game Ciri had two distinct groups they were aiming for: people who found Geralt even more appealing because of the fatherhood angle so they had to work his actual kid in AND hot girl fan service.

The thing is, if they gave her too much personality or depth, she wouldn’t have fit into these groups well and therefore people would’ve found her annoying and/or off-putting. People already do sometimes but not to the degree that they would’ve if they even BEGAN to touch on the absolute shitstorm that is Ciris psyche after everything.

Also realistically, they made the Witcher games centre about Geralt bc he appeals to their large majority male fan base: combatant, dark mysterious tragic past, ripped, attractive, fucks hot women, is a good guy while still also getting to do badass things and beat people up. If you look in depth at Witcher fans on different platforms when they talk about him, a lot of dudes are very much “oh my god he’s literally me”. Ciri could never be the focus because she wouldn’t appeal to that same group, and we know that every time a game is released people throw the weirdest bitch fits about female characters, especially main ones.

This is also why Ciri is made an attractive character, when realistically that tiny little facial scar they’ve given her is nothing, she’s spent her developmental years on the run/being attacked/under extreme stress so I honestly can’t imagine her being a tall skinny but also hourglass woman with one or two scars, and put her in a cropped shirt (such a bad choice it’s mildly hysterical).

I think Lambert and Syanna are also a really good example of how people handle angry traumatised characters too, because Lambert gets a lot more leeway than Syanna (and I say this as a big fan of both!) Like there are literally people out there and on this webbed site who say she is pure evil, one of the evilest people in the Witcher for being a fucked up mean trauma victim who hurt a Poor Little Meow Meow (Higher vampire with decades of life experience more than her, incredibly possessive, responded to emotional manipulation by violently attacking an entire city). Like Lambert literally brags about axii’ing a guy to shoot himself in the head with his own crossbow.

Ciri got done very dirty, but I see how and why it happened. Book Ciri deserves rights but unfortunately I think Games Ciri will always be how people perceive her, and therefore portray her in fic, art and other work predominantly (praying same doesn’t happen with TWN Ciri). We’ve been robbed of such a complex, angry young woman and I mourn it 🙏

Edit: I can’t even touch on the Emhyr thing because the fact she can reconcile with him is honestly mildly fucking horrific. Like even if they’ve removed the nasty ass incest factor, that man quite literally destroyed her entire world and was willing to do so further in order to get his way. The fact she can call him father in one ending is genuinely vomit inducing and so disrespectful to Ciri as a character (also the audacity to play down that Ciri literally sees Yen as her mama WHILE playing devils advocate for War McCrime is a whole choice).

[grzybjek]

for some reason i cant answer this ask directly BUT thank u user @honestlytastygayasstrash for the ask now get ready for the longest post ill ever write. I fucking love talking about my characters.

here they are. my scrimblos. :

Antek, token cis white man of the group: -ISFJ, he/him, age is around 18, listens to ABBA, Queen, Modern Talking, Manaam, Obywatel GC, Lady Pank and Depeche Mode.

(i think i wrote it on his ref sheet but he got his scar by simply tripping over a cupboard as a child. He doesnt tell anyone about this though and always comes up with different stories about how he got the scar. So some people think he got it by winning a bear fight or fighting a drunk old man)

-he is a fucking menace. and i mean it. most insane man on earth that always tries to grab others attention in the most dangerous and stupid ways imaginable. Also uses alcohol as his weapon to look and act more cool and always fails miserably. Hes also very noncommittal and always switches out the people that he talks to after a week, simply because he doesnt feel comfortable with anyone. But he still loves getting attention from others so he keeps getting into these relationships just to drop them later. Theres something different about Bianka and Gabriel though and thats why theyre friends. and I think his pinterest board explains his personality better than i ever will

and some fun facts! hes surprisingly good at cooking and is the only one in the group that knows how to drive a car.

if it comes to Bianka shes my favorite goth woman ever. Here is some info about her: -ENTJ, she/them, is around 17, listens to Siouxsie and the Banshees, Bauhaus, Sisters of Mercy, Myslovitz, Republika, Depeche Mode and The Cure.

-Obviously shes recognized mostly for her gothic makeup which I absolutely love drawing. And shes goth herself, and is even in a gothic punk band! The band members include her, as the bassist, Helena as the singer, Janek as the drummer and Antek used to play the keyboard before they kicked him out.

And this is how I imagine them:-) just two alt girls and just some guy. Love them

-Bianka is the most confident out of everyone in the group, even Antek who's all over the place. She knows when to stop talking unlike him though. However her being confident doesnt mean she likes being in the spotlight, in fact, she absolutely hates it. She hates that everyone is always listening to her and whenever she walks in the room all eyes are on her. So most of the times she just wants to hide and spends time in her little circle of friends, but if theres an emergency then shes the first one to intervene. She also has a very weird moral compass just like Helena so theyre best friends, obviously.

Literally her. A fun fact about her is that she has like four Siouxsie and the Banshees posters in her room and owns a golden retriver which I didnt name yet.

oh and i forgot to mention but Bianka has Chinese ancestors and has a lot of chinese facial features that I always fail to draw because I focus on her makeup too much.

The last one is Gabriel, miserable ginger guy whos also the main character of the plot and yet i know so little about him. Im still figuring out his personality honestly. Anyhow:

-ISFP, he/him, age 17, listens to Tame Impala, Gorillaz, The Strokes, MGMT, David Bowie, Dolly Parton and Depeche Mode. All three of them are Depeche Mode fans.

-As I mentioned I know very little about him. But I think hes more of watcher of the world around him than a member of it. He's mostly quiet because he cant figure out when its the best time to speak, unfortunately that also means he keeps his best jokes to himself. Hes also mostly dissociated from the world and tries to be an active member of it so bad that he always ends up doing stupid things or hurting himself in the process. I think its just safe to say hes still figuring out his place in the world, and because the world around him confuses him so much he holds onto safe memories most of the time. Thats why hes a photographer and likes catching all of the important moments of life on camera, its like a comforting feeling for him. Hes also very irrational and a people pleaser but i blame it on his undiagnosed AuDHD honestly.

questionable pinterest board explains his personality well too

-as hes the narrator of the story, its very important to mention hes a queer character. I avoided talking about the queernes of others characters on purpose, since its an important part of their story that i dont want to share yet but without any context ill just say that Gabriel is a trans man and bisexual!

as for fun facts he owns a cat named Felek, really likes green olives and lives with his grandparents. Antek also taught him how to drive a car but he never put that info in use.

AND HERE COMES MY FAVORITE PART!!!! ILL EXPLAIN THE DYNAMIC BETWEEN THEM ALL!!!

starting with Gabriel and Nastka, whom I didnt mention in this post as shes just a side character, its important to know that these two are childhood friends. Theyre not that close anymore, their relationship disappeared as time went on, but they both keep each other in their memories and think about each other a lot. They both nicknamed each other after Dead Poets Society characters too, so Nastka never calls Gabriel by his name, but Todd. Theyre also neighbours and share a balcony. Sometimes they meet there as theyre hanging up clothes to dry and just exchange smiles.

The relationship between Gabriel and Antek is more complicated. They met on a party once and never got to know each other better, but couldnt stop thinking about each other. Gabriel just knows about Antek from Bianka's stories and vice versa, and whenever they meet everyone thinks theyre best friends because of how well they can get along without even knowing a thing about themselves. They always end up dancing together on parties, going on walks at night and talking about their favorite books somewhere in the corner, having deep conversations about their views of life but they never ask each other personal questions and if you ask one of them to say whats their favorite color, they wouldnt know. I like to think the universe never gave them a chance to know each other better because if it did theyd be too powerful together. Maybe if they got to know each other better theyd be more than friends.

Bianka and Anteks relationship is pretty similar to the relationship between Gabriel and Nastka. Theyre also childhood best friends and first met each other in the counselors office in 6th grade as Bianka tried to beat someone up for being mean to Antek, a guy she didnt even know yet. She just needed an excuse to get in a fight with some boys that she didnt like and somehow made a best friend ten minutes later. Since then theyve been on and off, sometimes splitting up for months at a time and going back to each other to spill everything theyve learned while they were away. They always find support in each other even if they cant understand each other that well and are total opposites. Somehow Bianka always finds a way to cheer up Antek, even if shes the one to make him feel bad in the first place.

Antek was the first one to suggest they should make a band, and they tried several times until they ended up with Helena and Janek which I previously mentioned.

And the last one, Bianka and Gabriels dynamic..... its very cute actually. Bianka is the first person to show Gabriel the world around him and introduce him to new possibilities. She showed him goth dance moves and helped him find his taste in music. They met in high school as they sat together in math class and if not Bianka being confident and immediately accepting Gabriel as her friend, hed never speak to her. He probably still thinks shes too cool for him, but is very happy to have her as a friend anyway even if he feels belittled by her sometimes. Feeling belittled is why Gabriel usually doesnt speak to her first and waits until she does it first. They often do sleepovers where they watch all of their favorite movies for the tenth time.

Also they all have friendship bracelets. All three of them.

I dont know what else I could talk about so i think thats all!! Thats still such a long post I hope someone actually reads it. Thank you for asking about them I had so much fun writing this<3

I also purposefully avoided talking about the plot of Migawka because I want to keep it a secret. I really want to write a book or a comic one day with all three of the characters and so I wanna keep the plot to myself until I finish writing.

anyhow, heres migawkas pinterest board.

https://pin.it/7tFnFoH

[nukzo]

Today is a good fucking day. First with my man blade's cameo in acheron's trailer which made me jump up from my chair and clasp my hands together in gratitude for whoever greenlit it. Sucks that it's not actually him but whatevaa I'm just happy to see blade again ToT

SECOND WITH THE BOOTHILL LEAKS. CAN I JUST. WOW. THE ATTENTION TO THE DETAILS. His left eye being a gun sight, his flared pants, that crop top OMFG, those shoes. A FASHION ICON. Can we talk about how cheeky his pose and battle stances are??? I love how you can get a taste of his personality simply through his gestures, facial expressions and body language. Such expressive character animations! HIS SHARK TEETH SMIRK god I love it I love it so so much. ALSO ALSO THE WAY HE FIRES HIS GUN DURING HIS SKILL/ENHANCED BASIC ATK? THAT MOVE. That move with the gun being fired right by his waist made me kick my feet and giggle when I first watched it. AND OFC HIS ULT. HIM SHIFTING HIS HIPS WHEN THE EXPLOSION OCCURS?!?!?! BRO?!?!?!?!?! OK WHY DONT YOU SHOW ME WHAT ELSE YOU CAN DO WITH THOSE HIPS SIR. Oh ya I almost forgot about that scar on his abdomen mmmhhhhm cute. Very cute. I imagine that he could get that part replaced since he seems to have an artificial body (?) but he chose to keep it and that's just so cunty of him ...and adorable even. I also heard that the wanted poster shows different enemies depending on who his standoff is with? The attention to detail regarding his visual design is just muah! I hope they do his tale justice bcs the last thing I'd want is a very poor storytelling situation for such a strong visual character plz. I can't wait to see what his personality is like too. Seems confident but reckless, maybe a little stupid too ugh what can I say, I love that in a man

I CANT WAIT TO FINISH UP MY WORK AND DRAW HIM ALREADY. ITS BEEN A WHILE SINCE IVE BEEN THIS HYPED UP ABOUT A CHARACTER SIMPLY OFF OF VISUALS

[hanzajesthanza]

drawing characters without key traits because i was so focused on drawing their face in general and then wondering why it doesn’t look like them. “why are you not you--”

[eijishimas]

DEMON/INCUBUS BAKUGO!!! sexy man

tries to get u to do sinful activities in the sheets w him but ure a lil slow about what he means so he just has to show u a good time ;))

sexy man sexy man— au’s are so fun to write, and demon/incubus!bakugou just makes sense to me??

i hope i did this idea justice tbh, i missed writing thirsts a little bit. sorry this took a little long (ik this was from around bakugou’s birthday OOPS) thank u for ur patience, sweet anon <3

hopefully the length of it makes up for it hehe,,, enjoy

there’s always been a bit of a looming presence over your shoulder when you turn in for the night. i’d like to think that demon!katsuki has been watching you for awhile now. he just observes you sleeping, which is kinda weird, but he wants you for himself. everything from the steady rise and fall of your chest, how you rub your thighs together when you’re cold, how your fingers grip the sheets when you have a nightmare. he wanted all of you. he can’t even stand it when you’re on your phone texting other men, or even your friends. not that you ever knew that.

when he manifests in front of you for the first time, you’re more confused than frightful. he’s tall and large, with sharp teeth and glowing eyes paired with devilish horns. veins run up and down his scarred arms, exuding power and dominance over you without him even needing to bat an eye. this man is such a FLIRT. he’s forward and possessive, wanting you all for himself and he isn’t willing to share. he knows you’re a virgin, he’s never had such an innate desire to corrupt someone more than you. your innocence would die with him, and he would drink in your facial expressions as you screamed around his cock with greed.

demon!katsuki would have you lay face down, your back arched as he nudges your wet folds with the head of his massive cock. it’s girthy, thick and twitching for you, and the grin he has on his face is undeniable. and you, poor innocent you, have no idea what you’re in for. your hands are clawing at the sheets and you’re whimpering from the stretch, moaning while he presses inch after unbelievable inch into you. you’ve never felt so full before, not with your own fingers at least. you’re quivering, bending before his will like water down a never ending stream.

while he fucks you, he pulls your back up to his chest so you can hear him growl, his pointed teeth dragging against your sensitive skin and making you clench your walls involuntarily. he’s got a strong hand around your throat, fucking you with only half his cock because he can already see the bulge in your tummy each time he pushes in. that feeds the fire in him, his ego inflating as he dirty talks you to filth. “been a while since i’ve had such a cute little virgin. i forgot how fuckin’ tight you all were. yeah that’s right, squeeze my cock just like that.”

oh i almost forgot to mention— his tail. absolutely devilish as it slinks around your torso, red in colour and smooth in texture. there’s a tiny triangular scale at the end of it, sharp and dangerous as it scours your body, tracing the insides of your thighs and warm against your swollen clit. he loves hearing you whine, watching you squirm as the stimulation from him is all far too much for your inexperienced body to handle. he’s barely working up a sweat and you’re cumming from how his cock kisses your cervix inside of you with each thrust of his hips, being unable to hold back your release any longer. making a mess on the bed with your essence, you’re gasping for air as katsuki licks a long strip from the base of your neck to the spot just below your jaw.

“what a good little plaything. don’t go wasting this pretty pussy on anyone but me, or else you’ll have some hell to pay for. hah?” he sinks his teeth into your skin, grinning at the mark he made. you were from that day on his, and only his, little plaything.

all works © eijishimas 2021. do not reuse, modify, or repost.

tags:

@lonleyweeb77 @cynthus-no @lonelyheart-cluband @smhhyung @stoopidnekobish @kiridarling @kirislilrock @baku-deku1 @angelsofprey @hajisuu @damnitcrowley @alixdelcourt @foruthemoon @peaxhcringe @justanotheruselessextra @izukuuarchive @katsuki-kitten @shokoarashi @bakugous-trauma sorry i couldn’t tag all of u!

want to be on the taglist? see here.

[mello-jello]

Don't we all agree that Hange loves to play pranks on Levi? I'm pretty sure the most fucked up joke she made was when she pretended to sacrifice to save humanity and being burn alive? lord, Levi was so pissed off! It tooked like 3 years to finally forgive Hange and they finally living in a small cottage in the forest. How do I know this? Cause I'm their handmaid.

omg anon, how does one get that job? I will do it for free! I would PAY to have that job.

I realize Tumblr is collectively over the BBC Sherlock, but can you just imagine Hange with a stupid pencil drawn on moustache, trying and failing SO HARD to lighten the mood?

Maybe Hange needed to lay low? Maybe the Yeagerists has eyes on Levi, and making contact with him would have put him at risk?

oh no...

UhHHmm... hang on, I made this into a whole thing:

It’s midday and yet the sky is dark. Thick storm clouds circle above, threatening torrential downpour at any moment. The ceremony was good, all things considered. The 104th all gave short speeches about their beloved commander, which was nice. The priest was a little religious but kept the service pretty well non-secular, which is what Hange would have wanted.

Levi on the other hand, would have loved some sort of reassurance that this wasn’t the end. He would love to be able to believe in a heaven, where Hange is spending their time in complete bliss and will be there when it’s his time. He wants to believe there is any sort of omnipotent being in control of everything. He wishes he was capable of that kind of thinking.

And yet.

Everyone has left by now, and Levi’s not sure how he’d been standing there, staring at the freshly laid soil below a headstone. Fighting back tears, he speaks aloud, a last ditch effort to communicate with God or whatever. How does he know for sure Hange’s not listening anyway?

"Hange,” his voice catches as he had been clenching his jaw all day.

“I… I was so alone and I owe you so much. But please, there's just one more thing... one more thing, one more miracle, Hange, for me? Don't. Be. Dead. Would you do that, just for me? Just stop it. Stop this..."

Levi felt silly. Talking out loud to the dead never appealed to him before, why would he start now? He dropped the bouquet of flowers he was gripping too tightly onto the grave and turned to leave, just as the rain started to pour.

---

Onyankopon, Gabi, and Falco can sense Levi’s depression. It stems from more than the loss of Hange, it comes from everything Levi has ever lost in his entire life. There is no need for Levi to fight anymore. No more distractions. The lack of distractions is what makes living on so difficult.

It’s been three years since that fateful day, and the trio wanted to do something on the anniversary to take Levi’s mind off of it, even if just for an evening. Levi was bitter and cold as usual, but he knew they were just trying to help, and he did appreciate it. So reluctantly, he agreed to a movie and dinner.

He never even needed to shave before, but Levi had grown quite an impressive moustache during this time. The kids seemed to like it, they said he looked distinguished. Levi figured it would also help get attention off his scars.

Gabi and Falco were particularly excited for the movie. It was a musical comedy, of all things. Levi surprised himself by actually kind of laughing at it. He enjoyed the caramelized popcorn, too. At dinner, the 4 of them sat around a fancy table and Levi listened wholeheartedly as the other 3 discussed the movie. At one point, Gabi had shot soda out of her nose from laughing too hard, and Falco was teasing her about it.

Levi was about to interject with a snide remark, when he was suddenly interrupted by a particularly terse waiter.

“Sir, I think, you’ll find this vintage to your liking”, they said in an accent Levi had never heard before, while shoving a bottle of wine in his face. Levi was pissed, as the bottle so rudely brought up unpleasant memories.

“Tch, no.” Levi said as politely as he could muster through his teeth.

“It ’as all the qualities of the old, with some of the colour of the new,” they said, as if purposefully ignoring him. Levi was actually having a good time tonight, why did this guy have to be so pushy?

Keeping his locked forward, Levi said again, “No, thank you.”

The waiter switched sides, now on Levi’s left, which had the eye he could see with. Onyankopon gave Levi a sympathetic look as the water continued, “Like a gaze from a crowd of strangers, suddenly one is aware they are staring into ze face of an old friend.”

“No, look seriously,” Levi finally breaks and looks up, “could you just-”

Levi’s face drops. His entire body jolts impossibly rigid, as he stares with an expression of utter disbelief.

Hange. Hange was the waiter. They dipped a napkin into a glass of water, and wiped off the fake mustache from their top lip. “Interesting thing, a tuxedo. Lends distinction to friends, and anonymity to waiters,” they said in their normal voice.

“Levi?” Gabi asks, and Levi is suddenly aware that he forgot to breathe. He forgot to blink too. He feared that if he moved in any way, Hange might disappear.

He turns his head to Onyankopon, then his eyes fill with tears and he ducks his head momentarily before he stumbles clumsily to his feet, shaking the table in the process. He looks at Hange again, who then extends their arms, as if expecting Levi to hug them.

“Hange?” Oyankopon questioned, incredulously.

Levi looked down at the table, breathing heavily before locking eyes with Hange again.

“Hey, does your rub off, too?” Hange gestured to Levi’s facial hair, to which he did not find funny. His gaze was slowly turning murderous.

Falco put his hand on Levi’s arm. “What-?”

“Well, long story short,” Hange explained, a little awkwardly. “I’m not dead.”

Hange stares into Levi’s eyes as they slowly realize that this was a bad idea. They start feeling guilty. “It was a bit mean, springing it on you like that, I know. I could have given you a heart attack, probably still will. But in my defence, it was very funny. Okay, it’s not a great defence-”

“I SAW YOU!” Onyankopon broke through their rambling.

“Oh, no-

“YOU DIED!”

“I just checked, and no, no I didn’t!”

Levi made a fist and pounded the table, nearly spilling all their drinks and drawing attention to them. Hange looked around nervously, but Levi did not care, although he whispered, “three years.”

“Okay, Levi, I’m suddenly realising I probably owe you some sort of an apology,”

Levi took another, deliberately deep breath and asked, “how?”

“Just… okay, one question! Let me ask one question,” Hange asked. They pointed to Levi’s moustache, “Are you really going to keep that?” They blurted out in laughter for all of 2 seconds before Levi launched at them. They both crashed to the floor, Levi on top of Hange, trying to throttle them.

[raiseyourcups]

Desire

Pairing: Din Djarin x f!Reader  (no use of Y/N because I found it was ruining my flow in writing sin) Warnings: 18+, Smut, just smut, vanilla as it may be, a little plot, but mostly just sinning, some fluff and non-canon compliant, unsafe sex (please wrap it before you tap it), maaaaaybe a slight breeding kink at the end there Word Count: 1.7k 

Summary: Din always knows where to go when he needs to release some tension before he explodes. This time is no different.

Note: the gif is unrelated to the content, it just does things for me. did it just get hot in here? no just me? (also go easy on me, I have never written smut before)

The Child is asleep and with the door closed most of the way, open a small crack in case he cries out for you two, you pull out a bottle of alcohol that you had been saving for Din's return. He raises an eyebrow at the sight of the two very full cups.

"Trying to get me drunk?"

"Wouldn't dream of it, but it's good whiskey and I've been saving it."

"Where did you find this?" Din asks after he takes a swig of it. It burns going down but with a fiery sweetness that leaves him wanting more. He understands why you chose it.

"That couple that lives on the other side of the jungle, the ones with that weird tree.” You two made for terrible neighbors, hadn't even learned their names.You knew they had a kid and good taste in alcohol but other than that, you didn’t ask questions and neither did they.

"Time for bed?" Din asked once your glasses were both empty. 

"As long as we're not sleeping," you tease, cheeks warm from the whiskey. 

"We won't be sleeping for a while now," Din says before he leans forward to kiss you with the same force as when he had first arrived. He ran his tongue along your bottom lip and you opened your mouth easier now that the Child was asleep in his room. No more worries about scarring the kid for life. Din wasted no time pulling you on top of him to deepen the kiss more. You let out a whine when he sucked on your bottom lip again.

It was a sloppy kiss but neither of you really cared. It had been so long since you had seen each other. Din wedged a thigh between your legs and you moaned at the cold of his beskar armor that he hadn't bothered removing yet. You ground down on his thigh, the ridges on it hitting your clit in all the right ways.

"That's right, cyar'ika, get yourself off on my thigh," Din mumbled against your neck. He started to suck on the one spot that never failed to make you fall apart in his arms. This time was no different.

"Din, please."

"No, riduur, first one is all you."

You let out another whine, dropping your head down to hide your face in his neck as you rode his thigh faster. You were so close, just a few more, and with a loud gasp you saw starbursts. Din ran his hand down your side, chuckling when you involuntarily twitched at the feeling. 

"Bed?"

"Yes, please, need you."

Din let out another chuckle and lifted you up from the couch. You pulled him into another kiss, equally as heated as all the other ones, and pushed him towards your shared bedroom. The two of you fell onto the bed and Din had to take a moment to enjoy the feeling of a real bed under him. 

"Don't fall asleep on me," you laughed when you heard his pleased groan.

"Don't worry cyar'ika, I'm nowhere near done with you,” he said rolling to his knees before getting off of the bed to kneel down at the foot of the bed. He trailed his hands up your calves, gently massaging them before he tightened his grip and pulled you to the edge of the bed. Replacing his hands, he trailed his lips up your legs, his facial hair making you laugh as it tickled your skin. Your laughs stopped when Din finally reached the one place you wanted him. 

He gently nudged your legs open and you held your breath as he chuckled. “You’re so wet for me, cyare.” 

You made to reply but he hooked his fingers on your underwear and pulled them down in one swift movement. Now your wetness was completely exposed to both him and the cooler night air. Din let out a low moan when he used his fingers to gently part your folds before he dived in, licking from the bottom to the top of your pussy. You let out a moan of your own when his tongue swirled around your clit. 

He pulled away just far enough to look up at you, a smirk on his face that was made dirtier when you saw the light shine on your juices on his lips. “ What do you think cyare, can you come for me again?”

He didn’t wait for you to answer before dove back in, mouth firmly attached to your clit while he slowly pushed two fingers into your pussy. You let out a loud whine at the feeling, still a little sensitive from the last orgasm. He started pumping his fingers in and out, mouth sucking at your clit. He set a pace that was just enough to bring you to the edge quickly which he must have known because he pulled away right before you could come. He removed his mouth and stopped moving his fingers. 

“Din! Don’t be a tease,” you cried. He knew how much you hated when he edged you and you weren’t in the mood for it right now. It had been so long since you’d done this. 

“Sorry, riduur.” You could hear the smirk in his voice and knew he was anything but sorry. He did get back to bringing you back to the edge, slipping a third finger in this time and curling them to hit the one spot that would make you see a whole new galaxy. His tongue was brought back into the mix, swirling around your clit and soon you hit your peak for the second time that night. Your back arched off the bed as Din worked you through your orgasm, fingers still pumping in and out until you tried to push them away due to sensitivity. 

Din removed them and moved up to kiss his way up your body, reveling in the way you twitched away from his touch. He loved how sensitive your whole body got when you climaxed. He reached your lips and you moaned at the taste of yourself on your tongue. “Are you ready for another one?” Din asked as he sat up, straddling you without putting his weight on you. Your mouth dropped open unsure how to answer. So you settled for watching him unzip his pants, knowing how much you liked it when he fucked you while wearing his armor. You were still dressed too minus your underwear that were...somewhere in the room. 

You watched as Din pumped his cock with the hand that was covered in your come and you knew the answer to his question. You would come as many times as he wanted you to as long as he fucked you soon. “Din, please…”

“Please, what, cyar’ika? You have to use your words.”

“Please fuck me, I need you now,” you whined, your pussy feeling emptier by the second. Din chuckled and moved into position, bringing one of your legs up and around his waist. He gave you a look, one eyebrow raised in question and you were quick to nod in response. That was all he needed before he lined up his cock with your pussy and slowly pushed inside. 

You let out a breathy moan when he bottomed out, his cock hitting so deep thanks to the angle. He waited for you to give him the okay to move, he knew it had been a while and he swore that he wouldn’t wait so long to come back again. He didn’t know how he had survived with just his hands when he had your perfect, wet, hot pussy waiting here for him. 

“Move,” you whispered, eyes meeting Din’s and seeing how blown his pupils were with lust. You were sure yours looked the same but your eyes fluttered closed when Din’s started thrusting. The pleasure was already almost too much for you to hold on. The pace he set was leisurely, getting you used to his cock moving in and out of you again.

“Faster, please!” You cried out when his pace just wasn’t enough for you anymore. You needed more.

Din obliged, he would do anything for you, and he sped up his pace and watched your face for when he hit that spot that would make you see stars again. You let out a moan and wrapped your arms around his neck when suddenly he found it. 

“Din!”

With a chuckle, he moved your leg further up until it rested on his shoulder and picked up the pace again, leaning over more at this angle. He brought a hand between the two of you and pressed down on your clit with his thumb before rubbing circles on it. You let out a whine as he hit that spot over and over again now paired with the thumb at your clit. The pleasure builds up faster than you could prepare for it. And all too soon you’re clenching around Din’s cock as you come around it. Din lets out a groan as he pumps into you to work you through the orgasm but he can feel his own coming faster than he can stop it. 

“Fuck, cyare, where can I come?”

You don’t even think before breathily answering, “Inside.”

Din lets out another groan at the permission, something you don’t indulge him in very often. He wonders if you know what you do to him sometimes. A few more thrusts and he’s coming in you, the warmth filling you and making you moan again. Din stills inside of you, doesn’t want to leave this moment. You under him, face the picture of perfection as you come down from your highs, and full of him. In more ways than one. 

He pulls out of you and lays next to you even though it’s uncomfortable in his armor now. You both need to catch your breath. You take a few deep breaths, body tingling from the multiple orgasms but that doesn’t stop the smirk that crosses your face when you feel Din’s come on your thighs. 

“I always forgot how much you love coming in me.”

Din lets out a groan and covers his face with his hands. “Riduur, don’t tease me, I need a little time before the next round.”

You let out a loud laugh and roll over to lay on his chest, “Don’t worry Din, we both need sleep first. I could see those dark circles before you even landed the Crest. But when we wake up, I need to return the favor.” 

“Is that a promise now?”

“Oh it’s a guarantee,” you say before settling your head down on Din’s chest. “But right now, sleep.”

[i-lionheart]

Here for You | Loki x Reader fluff

"There are moments that the words don't reach. There's a grace too powerful to name. We push away what we can never understand; we push away the unimaginable." -Hamilton, "It's Quiet Uptown"

After an emotional night, Loki's partner leaves her Avengers Tower apartment, showing up in need of comfort at Loki's door.

before you read: loki x reader, 1.5k words, reader is afab nonbinary, angst, emotional hurt/comfort, partial nudity (non-sexual), cuddling/spooning, discussion of gender dysphoria, period mention, body dysphoria, discussion of depression, suicidal thoughts, and self harm.

tw: gender dysphoria, period mention, partial nudity (non-sexual), depression mention, suicidal thoughts, self harm mention. @ me if there's anything I forgot.

You padded down the hallway, clutching the stuffed animal and baby blanket that had protected you from your demons since you were a child. Since your apartments were right next to each other, it was only a short distance to Loki's door; when you reached it, you knocked quickly and stood there, anxiously chewing your the inside of your cheek as you waited.

You heard his heavy footsteps crossing the apartment. Though his voice was muffled by the door separating the two of you, the annoyance was unmistakable. "Thor, I told you, I'm-"

He opened the door. His words cut off abruptly as he realized that it wasn't, in fact, his older brother bothering him in the middle of the night. His heart and facial expression melted as he looked you up and down, taking in your disheveled appearance. You stared back at him nervously, unable to verbally express what you needed from him now that he was actually standing in front of you.

Luckily, you didn't have to.

In a heartbeat, Loki had crossed the threshold of his apartment, pulling you into a tight embrace. He pressed your head to his chest and you melted into him, the tears that had escaped you all night finally beginning to flow. "It's all right, darling," he murmured. "It's all right. I'm here now. It's all right."

The two of you stood there for a moment that felt like an eternity, your entire world reduced to the feeling of being in each others' arms, Loki caressing you and whispering soft reassurances. Once the waterfall of your tears had slowed to a mere trickle, Loki said, "All right. You're coming inside." He bent down and hooked one arm under your knees, lifting you into his arms as easily as if you were a child. You squeaked in surprise and buried your head in his chest, eliciting a small chuckle from the trickster god as he carried you into his apartment and eased the door shut behind you. He didn't put you down until the two of you were in his bedroom, when he pulled back the soft covers of his king-size bed and set you gently on the gold satin sheets. He climbed in beside you and pulled the covers up around you both, once again pulling you to his chest.

"You don't have to tell me what's going on," he said, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. "But if you want to talk about it, I'm here to listen."

"It's my stupid period," you grumbled into his chest.

"What?" he said. "I thought you haven't had one for months now - didn't Strange get that sorted?"

"Yeah, but the hormones are still a fucking roller coaster."

"You mortals and your pesky bodies," he muttered into your hair. You couldn't help but giggle, despite your sadness. "What is it doing to you this time, darling?'

"Gender," you grumbled. "I'm fine with my body. I like my body. Or at least, most of the time I do, and then my hormones go insane and I hate it."

"Wishing you were a shapeshifter again, hmm?" Loki said. You nodded. "If I could give up my powers to you I'd do it in a heartbeat, dearest." You chuckled, in spite of yourself. "Thanks, babe."

"No problem," he replied. The two of you lay in comfortable silence for a moment, glad to just be in each other's presence. He caressed you gently - your hair, your arms, your back - then paused in confusion when he felt a seam under your shirt. He had never known you to wear a bra under your pajamas, especially given how much you hated to wear them during the day.

"Darling?" he asked, cautiously.

"Hmm?"

"Are you binding right now?"

"Yeah, but it's fine, I-"

"No, it's not," he cut you off sternly. "You know you're not supposed to. It's unsafe."

"Since when do you care about safety?"

"Since you tried to sleep in a binder. Sit up. It's coming off."

"Loki, really-"

"Now. You could do with some skin to skin anyways." His tone left no room for argument. Grudgingly, you pushed yourself into a sitting position, as did he.

"Arms up," he commanded. You rolled your eyes and did as he said, feeling like a toddler who needed their parents' help to get dressed. He lifted your shirt and gently pulled it over your head, then gathered it into a ball and tossed it on his floor. He removed your binder equally gently, careful not let the elastic snap or pinch, and tossed it on the floor on top of your shirt.

"Satisfied?" you said sarcastically.

"Not quite yet." He grasped the collar of the black t-shirt he was wearing and pulled it over his head in one fluid motion, adding it to the pile of clothing on his floor.

Though you had seen it a thousand times, you took in the sight of his chest, drinking in every inch of his skin. He caught your eye as you stared at him, and grinned. You blushed. "See something you like, pet?" he teased.

"Oh, shut up," you retorted as the two of you laid back down, snuggling into him again. He was right - the feeling of his skin, his strong arms wrapped around you, was incredibly soothing.

"I needed this," you murmured.

"I know."

A pause.

"I hate this body so much, sometimes. Like, I'm mostly okay with it, even proud of it, and then..."

You trailed off. He stroked your hair, whispering into it. "Take your time, love, it's all right."

You took a deep breath, gathering your thoughts, and continued shakily. "It's just... sometimes, I look in the mirror, and I look at my face, and I feel so happy - my reflection matches who I am, I look like myself - and then I see my body and I remember and I just..." You swallowed thickly, fighting back tears. "I just want to die, sometimes. I wish I didn't have to exist and face every day in a body that's not mine, I want to hurt it, scar it, make it bleed. Anything to show that it doesn't belong to me, to make it pay. I hate it. And I know I shouldn't hurt myself, I know I gave that up a long time ago, but that urge never leaves. I hate it, I hate it so much. I know it's not right, but that voice never goes away, it just gets quiet enough to ignore until the next time something triggers it and I have to fight it again. It never stops, Loki. Never." Your tears were flowing freely now. You took a shuddering breath. "I'm just so, so tired of always fighting. I want peace. But I don't think I'll ever have it."

"Oh, pet." he said softly. "How long were you feeling like this before you came to get me?"

"Hours," you admitted, feeling small.

"Oh, darling," he said. You heard the pain in his voice, and knew that what he really meant was I'm sorry.

"It's going to be okay," he said, voice ever so tender, tracing wandering patterns on your skin. "I know it's hard, but you are strong. You are a fighter, and you will make it through this. I promise you. And I will do everything I can to help."

"Really?"

"Really, dearest. You never have to face this alone again. I'm right by your side. In fact, this settles it. You're moving in with me. Tomorrow."

"What?" You pulled away from him, startled, and looked up to see dead seriousness on his face.

"What about it, pet? You practically live here already."

"Loki, the others can barely accept the fact that we're together. We can't move in together. Tony will have a heart attack."

Loki grinned wickedly. "Good."

You slapped his arm playfully, scolding him. "No, it's not good. If Tony had a heart attack, the arc reactor would probably flatten half of Manhattan." He chuckled appreciatively. "Why's it so pressing for me to move in, anyway? Most days you hardly spend a second without me."

He paused, giving you a long, searching look. "Isn't it obvious?

"No." You looked away, avoiding the discomfort of his scrutiny.

"Look at me." You didn't move. He reached out and cupped your face in his large hand, lifting your chin. "Look at me, dearest," he repeated, softer this time. You tore your eyes away from the empty space you had fixed them on and looked at him, afraid of what you'd see. He looked back at you tenderly, eyes full of compassion and the thing you had been most afraid of seeing.

Love. His eyes were full of love.

"You spent an unnecessarily long time tonight fighting this alone, because I wasn't with you. I wasn't there to help you when you needed me." He stroked your cheek with his thumb, voice tight with emotion. "I cannot let that happen again."

"Loki," you breathed. "You care that much?"

"Oh, darling, of course I do," he said. "Of course I do. And I promise that you will never have to face these thoughts alone again."

if you enjoyed this fic, please consider reblogging so this work can find other people who might enjoy it!

[isolemnlyswearpevensie]

Nothing Changed But Everything’s Different | Sirius Black x Reader

Warning: slowburn angst, mentions of slight violence, alcohol, no happy ending

Time/Era: Marauder Era, Ages 18-21

Word Count: 10.1k

Summary: Sirius found someone who made him believe in love at first sight. 

Request: Okay! :) Well in that case can I have an ANGST Sirius x Reader? Where they’ve been together for a few years (it’s post-hogwarts only a couple years) but the relationship is starting to sour and crumble. Sirius being Sirius is flirting with other girls and just neglecting y/n. They argue a lot and everyone can see that it’s deteriorating. It gets to a point where he just flat doesn’t acknowledge her even though they live together, long and ANGSTY pls 🥺 :) U decide the ending! :) Ty, much love!

A/N: I worked really, really hard on this so I hope you enjoy :) Let me know what you think :)

part 2 | masterlist | marauders era playlist | read on ao3

“She’s absolutely gorgeous, Prongs!” A young Sirius Black twirled around the dorm room and fell onto his bed with a dreamy sigh. “She’s witty and smart mouthed, but she’s so sweet and nice at the same time. She listens to the Weird Sisters and Queen and she’s a total badass.” 

“Y/N L/N?” James scoffs, bending over a sketch he was working on. It appeared to be an intricate building of some sort, complete with four stories and geometric windows. 

“Yes, Y/N L/N! I think it’s love at first sight, Prongsy. I’m going to marry that girl one day.” Sirius laid one of his ankles against the post of his bed. The leather of his boot made a loud squeaking noise, and James cringed.

“Have you ever even talked to Y/N L/N?” James smiled smugly and smudged ink across the side of his hand. 

“Have you ever had an actual conversation with Lily Evans?” Sirius countered, making James sputter. James looked diagonally towards Sirius and moved his head so their corresponding bedposts weren’t in the way. 

“I have! This morning, for example! We talked about the morning toast for a full 3 minutes!” His glasses began to fog as his cheeks warm. Sirius laughed heartily and threw the pillow that was under his head square at James’ face. With a deep ‘oof,’ James looks back towards Sirius, glasses now crooked. “Fine, don’t believe me! You’re just angry Evans is finally starting to fall for my charm.” 

“Ah yes, my bad. I forgot sweat and body odor was irresistible to girls.” 

“Lily isn’t a girl.” James reached his slender fingers to level his glasses. “She’s a woman.” 

Sirius was sent into hysterics; chest heaving, loud laughter, tearful, hysterics. James rolled his eyes and threw the pillow back at Sirius. But, in all of its glory, the cushion hit Sirius’ bedpost and sent feathers flying through the air. Sirius busts out in even more laughter, falling to the floor with a big, dramatic thud. 

“What’s going on here?” Remus asks, entering the room and setting his bag onto his bed. “Why is Pads on the floor?” 

“JP assaulted me!” 

“I DID NOT YOU THREW FIRST!!!” 

Remus chuckled under his breath and unbuckled his bag to retrieve his homework. “And what exactly caused this alleged assault? Did Sirius call you Prancer again?” 

A bark sounding laugh came from Sirius and James scowled. 

“No, we were just talking about his newfound obsession with Y/N L/N and he took an unwarranted dig at mine and Lily’s relationship.” 

Remus snorted and set his work on his desk. “What relationship?” Sirius let out another “HA” and pulled himself back onto his mattress. “And isn’t Y/N L/N the one who called your hair greasy, Pads?” 

“Well, yes, but I like a woman with a bit of attitude,” Sirius sighed dreamily. His left pointer finger, ring and all, came to twirl a chunk of his hair. “I think I want an autumn wedding.” 

“You’re not getting married to her, mate. You don’t even know her.” James came to Remus’ bed and started poking around his bag. “Are you putting on the scar ointment Pomfrey gave you still, Moons? Hey! Stop picking at that one, you’re going to make it worse!” He slapped Remus’ hand away from his face and Remus rolled his eyes. 

“Who are you? My mother?” 

“I am too going to marry her, James! Just watch me!” 

Peter opened the door solemnly, a grumpy look plastered on his face. James turns nervously towards him before slapping him on the back. 

“What happened, Pete? I thought you were supposed to be on a date?” 

“I was, but she stood me up. Again.” Peter responds, making a beeline for the window seat. Conveniently, it was located next to his bed, so he haphazardly tossed his school bag onto the mattress. He grabs hold of one of the pillows before hugging it to his chest and burying his head into it. Sirius and James share a look before Sirius speaks up. 

“Awh, you’ll get ‘em next time. Don’t worry too much about it. It’s her loss, really.” 

“No, it was my loss. It was Abagail Cavin, mate. It was definitely my loss.” Peter’s voice was muffled as he muttered into the soft fabric. 

“Who’s Abagail Cavin?” Sirius asks, looking towards Remus for an answer. He shrugs. 

“I think that’s the ginger girl who always hangs around Y/N L/N? A year or two below us,” James thought aloud. “She’s friends with Lily too, I’ve seen them studying together.” 

Remus snorts. “Of course you have.” 

“I don’t know if I’m sad or angry.” The mousy boy admits, throwing the pillow in his lap at the wall. It hit one of Sirius’ Queen posters, making the frame fall to the floor with a loud crash. James is quick to swoop in and redirect Peter’s attention in fear of him escalating. 

“Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay, there’s no need to get mad at Abagail. Um, how about we go get some sweets from the kitchens, yeah? Maybe that’ll make you feel better.” 

Peter tightened his jaw, staring at the now shattered frame on the ground. After a moment of silence from all the boys, Peter nodded and the pair exited the room. 

~

“Y/N L/N,” Sirius spoke in his signature flirty voice. He tried to match her walking pace, but she seemed to be in a rush. 

“Sirius Black, what can I do for you?” Y/N answered, her school uniform skirt swaying as she walked. She was on her way to meet Abagail in the library so the two could study together, and she was already 5 minutes late. 

“I was wondering if you would -excuse me, sorry- if you would like to go to the next Quidditch match with me?” Y/N seemed to swerve in and out of the crowded hallway like a car in heavy traffic. “Supposed to be a good game, you know.” 

“Me? Go with you? While you cheer your little boyfriend on? Thanks for offering, but I have to decline.” 

“Come on, you always go anyway! It could be fun!” Sirius finally matched Y/N’s fast gait. “And maybe we could grab some hot butterbeer or cider after.” 

Y/N sighed, suddenly stopping at the entrance of the library. She faced Sirius boldly and grabbed his upper arms with her hands. 

“Listen, it’s really flattering that you want me to go with you, and I have to admit, you’re super cute. But, you don’t exactly have the best track record with girls and I don’t want to be just a checkmark on your list of girls to shag.” 

While any person would be wounded by Y/N’s blunt assumptions, Sirius grins. “That’s where you’re wrong, love. I don’t really have a track record with girls, unless you count the week I dated Marlene McKinnon the October of our 2nd year. It’s our 7th year and I’ve had one kind-of girlfriend.”

Sirius watched as Y/N’s facial expression changed. Taking this as an invitation to keep going, he rubs his hands together and continues. “And if you’re talking about shagging, I’ve shagged maybe three girls who were not on some kind of to-fuck list, thank you very much.” Sirius suddenly leans in so he could whisper. “I’m just flirty. And based on the look on your face, the flirting is working.” 

“Y/N!” Abagail’s voice made Y/N drop her hands and Sirius smirk. “What are you doing?” 

“Oh, we’re just chit chatting,” Sirius answers for Y/N. “But, I do have a question for you, Ab.” 

Abagail’s face scrunched in response. “Don’t call me that. What’s your question?” 

“Why’d you stand up my mate Peter?” Sirius now stood with his feet shoulders width apart, arms crossed over his chest and his hair pulled to one side. Y/N couldn’t help but admire how well Sirius’ uniform pants fit. 

“What do you mean, stand him up? We talked about hanging out, but we never made actual plans. Honestly, I don’t really think I want to make any official plans. Some of the things he says are kinda scary.” Y/N looks sympathetically towards her friend.

“I told you to just ignore him, babes.” 

“I know, I know. I really think he’s a nice guy deep down though.” 

Sirius looked puzzled, “What harmless, little Peter Pettigrew says scares you?” 

Abagail nods frantically, “He came and sat with Lily and me when we were studying in the library last week. He went on a rant about how he can’t wait to become an Auror just to see,” The girl lifted her fingers to so air quotes. “How far he can take it.” 

“That doesn’t sound like Peter at all,” Sirius’ eyebrows knit in confusion. 

“Well, it was. And Y/N and I have a lot of studying to do. So, if you’ll excuse us.” Abagail gently tugged at Y/N’s arm. 

“Wait! So, is it a date, Y/N?” Sirius called after the girls. Y/N turned over her shoulder and beamed. 

“Common room before the match. I don’t like to be kept waiting, Black!”

~

“You don’t like to be kept waiting… but you think it’s perfectly okay to leave me all alone in the common room? That’s not very kind, Y/N.” Sirius watched Y/N descend the stairs to the girls dormitory. He was wearing his Gryffindor sweater and ripped black jeans, his hair tied messily in a bun. A long, striped scarf dangled lazily on his shoulders and draped down his frame to his mid thigh. 

“I said before the match and if I’m not mistaken, it’s before the match.” Y/N tossed her hair over her shoulder. “Are those for me?” 

Sirius quickly stood, holding out a beautiful bouquet of sunflowers. “Heh, yeah. I thought it was fitting because it’s the middle of October and we’re going to a Quidditch match. The leaves are orange and there’s so many colors and the sunflowers have the same kind of color pallet-” 

“Sirius, they’re lovely. Thank you.” Y/N cut off the blabbering boy. She took the flowers happily and observed their pretty petals. Sirius was right; the rich golden color matched the fallen leaves that littered the Hogwarts grounds. Y/N held up a waiting finger to Sirius so she could go leave her flowers in her dorm. 

“It’s pretty cold out, love, do you want to grab a jacket?” Sirius said when she returned. 

“It’s all in the name of fashion, my dear,” Y/N pulls a piece of hair behind her ear and nods towards the portrait hole. “Shall we?” 

Y/N sat in the crowd with her legs crossed; her shoulders were slumped forwards and her hands stayed sandwiched in between her thighs. Gryffindor was absolutely destroying Ravenclaw with the impressive score of 80-10. 

“The snitch is right by Potter’s head!” Y/N screeched, bumping Sirius’ shoulder with her own. 

“Where?! I don’t see it!” 

“To the right! Meadowes needs to catch it before Lockhart sees it!” Y/N shivers in spite of herself, bringing her hands to her mouth in order to warm them. Sirius snickers and loops his scarf around her shoulders. 

“Hopefully that doesn’t ruin your outfit, love.” Sirius winks and turns back to the game. 

The scarf was soft and toasty, and smelt exactly like Sirius. The satisfying mix of leather, butterbeer, pine and smoke engulfed her senses and made her dizzy. Y/N wrapped it around her arms and snuggled deeper into the soft knit. 

“Meadowes spots the snitch!” Remus announces over the intercom. The entire statum seemed to erupt into chaos; cheers and boos echoing off of every surface within 500 feet. 

Y/N had always had a soft spot for Remus; they weren’t friends, but something about him was so warm and inviting. He in no way seemed like the type to announce a Quidditch match, but it appears that when you’re friends with James Potter long enough, anything could happen. 

Dorcas zooms past the Gryffindor student section in her pursuit for the snitch. The entire group, Lily and Marlene especially, scream out loud words of encouragement. Y/N could have sworn she could see a faint smile appear across Dorcas’ features. 

“Potter scores! 10 points to Gryffindor! 90-10! Ravenclaw could still win if Lockhart catches the snitch!” 

“Come on, come on,” Sirius mumbles under his breath. No matter how much he liked to deny it, Sirius got really into Quidditch. He couldn’t play for shit, but he knew the mechanics of the game like the back of his hand. 

“Meadowes catches the snitch! Gryffindor wins!!” The entire crowd goes ballistic. Kids hug, and some kiss, before storming the field to congratulate their team. James stays on his broom, doing small loops in the air in the hopes of impressing a certain redhead. 

Sirius wraps his strong arms around his date, pulling her to her feet and lifting her into the air. “We won, Y/N! We won!!” 

Y/N snakes her arms around Sirius in return, a similar happiness bubbling in her chest. 

“What’d ya say about grabbing some hot cider from the kitchens to celebrate?” Sirius questions, noticing they’re the last students at their seats. 

Y/N nods, a soft smile gracing her face. “Yes, please. I’m fucking freezing.” 

~

“It would be easier if you just levitated the boxes in, love.” Y/N watched as Sirius struggled to carry boxes into the living room of their new flat. She giggled, admiring her boyfriend’s flexed biceps and strong hands. The prominent veins in his hands and forearms were bulging, making the manual labor a show for his very happy girlfriend. 

“I feel like that’s bad luck,” Sirius explained, placing the cardboard onto the floor. “I want to do this right. If I don’t we could be cursed.” 

“Whatever you say, babe. But, just so you know, that box goes into the kitchen.” With a flirty wink and smile, Y/N walked into their bedroom to unpack some of their boxes. 

Their new flat wasn’t overly exciting; it was a one bedroom, one bath flat above a small bakery in the center of London. It was a tiny space, as you’d expect two barely-twenty-year-olds to own, but it would soon be their home. Y/N was just excited the flat had a kitchenette and a small living space. 

The best part, in Y/N’s opinion at least, was the fact that the smell of freshly baked bread filled their flat at the beginning of each day. The elderly bakery owners, Jullian and Caspar, had given the young couple a good price on the flat. According to them, they were waiting for the perfect couple to rent from them. What that meant, Y/N didn’t know, but it made her feel special all the same. 

Y/N looked out of their window to the hustle and bustle on the sidewalk below. The shop was a small, hole in the wall bakery called Dream Puffs, that was oddly popular for its location. And Y/N was quick to understand why. Almost everything they made, especially the sour dough bread and cream puffs, were to die for. Jillian had presented Sirius and her a large loaf of the bread and a dozen cream puffs as a welcome present, most of which had been eaten already. Y/N wished she had known of Dream Puffs and the wonderful owners before, but she supposed she still had a lot to discover in London. 

The one downside was the only way to get into their apartment was by going through the bakery. It’s not the worst thing in the world, but when you’re in a rush or having a bad day, having to face random people isn’t the most ideal situation. Jullian and Caspar were nice enough to close the bakery early for the couple’s move in. 

“I thought you were supposed to be unpacking?” Sirius poked his head into their bedroom with sweat dripping down his brow. 

“Oh right, sorry,” Y/N lazily flicked her wand and their clothing sprang to life. 

“Bad luck, Y/N!” He entered the room and wrapped his arms around her waist from behind, laid his chin on her shoulder and looked out the window. The busy streets and buildings were muted by the glass, which made Y/N feel as if they were watching ants in an ant farm. 

“I doubt we’ll get bad luck from levitating a few shirts, darling,” Y/N brought one of his hands to her mouth, gently kissing his knuckles before returning it to her waist. “I can’t believe this place is ours,” 

“Well, technically it’s Jillian’s and Caspars, but yes.” Sirius chuckles directly into Y/N’s ear and kisses her shoulder. “I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.” 

“Are you asking me to marry you?” 

“Yes and no. Not now, obviously, but eventually. We’re going to be together forever anyway, so why should we rush?” 

Y/N sighed happily, feeling very loved. 

~

“Do you think Abagail will ever talk to me again?” Peter asked, laying his head against the armrest of the couch. “I heard she's working at the book shop in Diagon Alley.” 

Y/N snorted, laying her head on her boyfriend’s shoulder and enjoying the sound of the record playing in the corner of the room. Sirius and Y/N were hosting a dinner party for their friends in celebration of James getting accepted into the Auror academy. The nine of them -Sirius, Y/N, James, Lily, Peter, Remus, Marlene, Dorcas, and Mary- were all piled in Sirius and Y/N’s small living room, tipsy and full of warm food. 

“That happened almost two years ago, Pete. Let it go,” Y/N hummed, Sirius’ gentle hand rubbing her back and lulling her to sleep. She could feel the vibrations of Sirius’ laughter through his leather jacket. 

“Yeah, so? I’m not allowed to like someone that long?” Peter’s voice was harsher than he anticipated, making Sirius send a glare his way. 

“She means stop moping around and pining after a girl who doesn’t want you. There’s a world of opportunity and thousands of girls just waiting to date you if you open your eyes to it.” Sirius’ tone was barely lighter than Peter’s. 

“Well I don’t want thousands of girls, Padfoot. I want Abagail. Not everyone can hit it on their first try.” 

“Hit it on their first try?” Y/N was now wide awake. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” 

“I mean,” Peter sat up, looking Y/N straight in the eyes. “You fucked Sirius on the first date.” 

“Woah, woah, woah, alright that’s enough. Wormy, Pads, Y/N, let’s all just take a deep breath and calm down for a moment.” James was quick on his feet to defuse the potentially harmful situation. He knew how Peter could get, and he didn’t want to see it escalate to that point. 

“Did you just slut shame me for having sex with my own boyfriend? Do you even have the authority to do that, Mr. Unused-Condom?” Y/N was now standing with James, starting to walk towards Peter. Peter stumbled to his feet and stared into Y/N’s eyes. 

“He wasn’t your boyfriend then, Miss Drop-My-Panties-for-a-Knut.” 

Sirius was quick to act, anger boiling inside of him. His knuckles balled into a fist and he threw a nasty punch square into Peter’s jaw. “No one insults my girl, Peter. I thought you knew better than that.” Sirius’ voice was like nothing Y/N had ever heard; it was cold and icy, yet fiery hot and full of hell-bending anger. 

Peter looked up and slugged Sirius right in the nose, making it gush blood. Remus grabs Sirius’ arms and binds them behind his back, trusting James to do the same to Peter. 

Y/N shrieked, having never seen Sirius or Peter get physical with anyone, let alone each other. Marlene grabbed her arm and pulled her away from the boys. 

“What have we talked about, you two?” James demanded, the vein on his neck bulging. 

“I’m not going to sit around and let him harass my girlfriend, JP! He’s a fucking asshole and he knows it!” Sirius struggled against his binds, but Remus was much stronger than him. 

“I’m not the one dating a slut!” 

“Get the fuck out of my flat!” Sirius screams making the room shake. Peter wiggles from James’ grip and grabs his wand before disapperating out of the room. 

Remus releases Sirius and he stomps out of the flat and down the stairs, most likely to go smoke a cigarette. James quickly follows after a glance towards Lily. 

“What did James mean when he said ‘what have we talked about,’ Remus?” Y/N asks, her soft voice a stark contrast from Sirius’ shouting. Remus runs a big hand down his face and plops onto the couch. 

“I wasn’t supposed to let you girls know,” He scoffs, shaking his head. “Sirius and Peter have been at each other’s throats for the past few years. Recently, it started getting physical. James always tries to defuse the situation, but it doesn’t work a ton.” Remus meets Y/N’s gaze and smiles sadly. “That boy would do absolutely anything for you, I hope you know that.” 

~

Sirius laid in bed with his arms wound tightly around Y/N’s waist. It was near 5 am and the light was just barely peeking through the window of their bedroom. The morning bread must have just been put in the oven, as the smell of fresh bread was slowly starting to overtake the flat. A long sliver of silver light slashed against the wall before fading delicately into the white paint. Sirius sighed contently and looked down at his girl. 

Her eyes were closed and her mouth was slightly agape; Sirius observed how Y/N’s eyes moved under her eyelids while wondering what she was dreaming about. He hoped she dreamt of him, as his dreams were constantly riddled with her. Every aspect of her danced around his dreams: her lovely smile, her laugh, her scent, her gait, and everything that made Y/N Y/N. Sirius’ own lips parted a miniscule amount as he brought the back of his fingers to brush her cheek. He couldn’t help but notice how soft her skin was under his touch. She was so peaceful in this moment, and if she was to be disturbed, the world would crack. 

But all good things come to an end, and Y/N opened her eyes. Her features were riddled with the grogginess of sleep as she batted her eyes to focus her vision. 

“Darling? Is everything alright?” Her voice was honey in his ears. 

“Perfect, my love. Go back to sleep.” 

“What time is it?” Y/N began to wiggle from his strong grip, but Sirius tightened his hold on her waist. 

The man shot a spare glance at the old coo-coo clock that hung in the corner. “Quarter to five” 

“Then may I ask why you’re awake?” 

Sirius sighed, pressing an opened mouth kiss on her forehead. “Couldn’t sleep, the nightmares are still awry.” 

“What was it this time? Your mom?” Y/N was now wide awake and propped up onto her elbow. 

“No, the last Order mission, actually,” Sirius gently brushed a clump of hair out of her eyes. “But it’s okay, I’m alright. I have you here with me.” 

Y/N’s eyebrows scrunched and her mouth pierced. “Do you want to talk about it?” 

“No, my darling. I just want to lay here with my beautiful girl in my arms.” 

~ 

“I’ve never been to this bar before,” Y/N giggles as Sirius opens the door to the small building. The outside’s appearance was rather unappealing; cracked, exposed brick that has moss growing out of it, a leaky gutter system, a splintering wooden door and a faded open sign. Y/N looked up towards the LED sign that spelled out the bar’s name. Silver Sickle Bar and Eatery illuminated in the wet pavement, but multiple letters were unlit, making it read Silver Ickle and Eat. 

“Me either, one of my clients works here and said she’d give me free drinks.” Sirius winked before following Y/N inside. 

The place was small and drafty, but oddly cozy. It had the same exposed brick as the outside, but this time, they were bright red and covered in picture frames.  A few wooden tables were scattered across the floor opposite the bar, and various older men sat with beers in their hands. 

“Oh, Sirius! My love, you came!” A very angelic girl from behind bar squeals, quickly exciting the bar and throwing her arms around Sirius. Her hurried speed made Y/N step away from the pair to avoid getting caught in the crossfire. Sirius chuckles heartily, wrapping his arms around her small frame, seeming to forget Y/N was there. 

“Vanessa! Nice to see you again,” He exhaled. A sinking feeling settled in the bottom of Y/N’s stomach. “How is your tattoo healing?” 

Vanessa pulls her shirt down to show Sirius the skin in between her breasts. On her skin sat a magical tattoo of a Hongorian Horntail dragon, which looked towards Sirius and blew a big breath of fire his way. The art was gorgeous, very obviously Sirius’ work, which only made Y/N’s stomach sink further into her feet. The red, lacy, v neck bra Vanessa was wearing brought out the ink in the tattoo perfectly, and the shape of the cut displayed not only her breasts, but the dragon beautifully. 

Y/N knew that many of Sirius’ clients were girls; she wasn’t stupid. He was a newly licensed tattoo artist at the biggest magical tattoo parlor in all of London. Not to mention, Sirius was an incredibly talented artist, which meant his appointment list was extremely difficult to get on. The charming attitude and good looks only added to the appeal of his artistry. 

“Who’s this?” Vanessa turned her gaze from Sirius’ to look directly at Y/N. Her long, black hair fell over her shoulder like a waterfall and her porcelain skin glowed under the dim lighting. 

“Oh! Right,” Sirius stuttered, shooting a grin in Y/N’s direction. “This is my gorgeous girlfriend, Y/N. Y/N this is Vanessa, I did her dragon tattoo last week.” 

Y/N forced herself to send a polite smile towards the girl who was just all over her boyfriend. Vanessa sent an equally fake smile and began to walk back to the bar. 

“And what can I get started for you, handsome?” She giggled, standing in front of the large wall of liquor. Y/N felt as if she was back at Hogwarts with all the girls throwing themselves at Sirius. 

“Old fashioned,” Sirius responded, taking place on one of the wooden stools. “And for the lady, tequila on the rocks with lime.” 

Vanessa sends Y/N an icy look before giggling sweetly. “Coming right up.” 

Y/N sends a worried glance towards Sirius, but he just responds by squeezing her thigh and kissing her temple. 

“So, do you have any tattoos? Since you’re so good at your job, I would assume you do, yes?” Vanessa asks, pouring Sirius’s drink and sliding it towards him. 

“Quite a few,” He catches the glass before it flies off the bar. “Most of them are covered by my shirt though.” 

It was true, Sirius’ torso and shoulders were littered with tattoos: A large lion across his right shoulder onto his bicep, stag antlers across his shoulder blades, a moon on the lower left side of his stomach, rat paw marks under the moon, and constellations riddling his collarbones. 

The bartender tilts her head to the side cheekily. “Can I see them?” 

Sirius chuckles in a very happy, flattered way. “I don’t think that’s quite necessary here,” 

“But I can already see this one…” Vanessa reached her arm across the bar and traced the bottom of the lion’s mane with her long, slender fingers. The tattoo seemed to move with her movements. “Can’t I see the rest?” 

Y/N coughs, slapping her hand against the bar. The vibration of Y/N’s sudden movement caused Sirius’ drink to wobble inside the glass. “I think I ordered a tequila not a random chick flirting with my boyfriend.” 

“Of course, how foolish of me.” Vanessa sent a scowl Y/N’s way and turned her back to fetch the bottle of alcohol. Sirius matched Vanessa’s expression. 

Once the flirt finished making Y/N’s drink, she slid it over to her. Y/N took a sip, only to find it was awfully made and very watered down. 

“Sirius, babe, I have a headache, can we go home?” 

“You didn’t have a headache a minute ago?” Sirius raises an eyebrow. 

“I know, I just feel a migraine coming on. I really need to take my migraine potion before it gets bad. Please?” 

Sirius sighs and nods, throwing an arm around her shoulders and kissing her temple. “Of course, babygirl.” 

The pair stand from their stools but Vanessa stops them. “That’ll be 2 galleons for the tequila.”

“You said you’d give me free drinks?” Sirius placed a comforting hand on Y/N’s lower back, rubbing small circles over her shirt. 

“Yeah, for you. The tequila wasn’t for you.” 

“Yeah, fine, whatever.” Sirius reached into his pocket and pulled out two galleons, slamming them onto the bar. 

“Can I bet on seeing you again?” A loud giggle comes from her mouth as the couple exited the building. “Maybe you can show me your tattoos.” 

~

“I don’t know, Lily! She was all over him and he didn’t stop it.” Y/N bit into an apple and traced the Potters’ tablecloth. It was a month after Sirius and Y/N had visited The Silver Sickle, and Y/N couldn’t keep her anxieties to herself. 

“Have you tried talking to him about it?” Lily responded, kneading a big glob of pie crust at the counter. Potter Cottage was much larger than Sirius and Y/N’s flat above Dream Puffs. Earlier that month, Lily had announced she was pregnant, so James decided it was time to upgrade from their small flat to a house fit to raise a family. 

“Yes, but each time I try to bring her up he gets defensive and assures me that it was nothing, that he was trying to get free drinks.” 

Lily stared down at her dough intensely before grabbing her rolling pin. “Well, I wouldn’t let him get away with it. Maybe try to ask him again tonight? Just sit down and have a real, hearts on the table conversation about your feelings and whatnot. It’s important to do that.” 

“Yeah, that’s the thing. He’s been staying at work late this entire week. Apparently, one of his clients is getting a full back tattoo and it’s taking multiple sessions to finish. This is his biggest job to date, I don’t want to ruin it for him.” 

“How late is late?” The mom-to-be laid the pie crust into her pan and began to trim the excess off of the edges. 

“Nine, sometimes ten. He comes home exhausted.” 

“Hm, okay. I’d still try to speak with him if you can. How’s your work going? St. Mungos treating you well?” 

“Oh, yeah, definitely. My supervisor said that I’m one of the best beginning level healers he’s seen since Pomfrey worked in my ward,” Y/N took another bite of her apple. “I might get transferred to the branch in France for a week coming up, though. There was a big gas explosion and they have over 200 burn victims. My supervisor said it would be a good experience for me.” 

“Oh, I read about that in The Prophet! Those poor people,” Lily filled the crust with apple pie filling. “I’m sure they need all the help they can get.” 

“Oh, I know. I haven’t learned much about burn solvents yet, so it’ll be interesting to learn on the job.” 

“Are you going this week? What a shame, it’s your birthday on Saturday.” 

“Oh, no, the earliest I would be leaving is a fortnight from now. I’m kind of a last resort since I don’t have much experience or training yet.” Y/N stood and threw her apple core into the bin. “How’s JP doing at the Academy? He’s in his second year by now, right?” 

“Oh, he’s doing lovely. The Order is grateful for his efforts and have been sending him on more missions than before.” Lily sighs. “It’s rather nerve wracking, isn't it? You’re lucky Sirius doesn’t get called on many.” 

Y/N laughed a bit uncomfortably. “Yeah, I suppose they prefer actual Aurors to go on the calls. But when he does go, those are the worst nights. I can’t imagine having to go through that on a daily basis.” 

“It’s really hard,” Lily’s voice cracks and she begins to cry. “I’m sorry, it’s the hormones.” 

“Don’t apologize, Lils. I know how scary it can be. At least he's with Wormtail most of the time, yeah? They’re at the academy together and all.” 

Lily takes a deep breath to control her crying. “Yes, I suppose you’re right. Thank god for Wormy.” 

~

“Hello there, pretty lady. I heard there’s a 21st birthday party to be thrown?” James said happily as Y/N opened the door of the flat. Lily and Remus tailed him ever so slightly, all three wearing large grins and holding brightly wrapped packages. 

“Birthday party? You guys don’t-” 

James waved his hand dismissively. “We’re already here, so you’re kind of stuck with us. Peter should be here eventually.” The three push their way into the living room. 

“The nice elderly woman downstairs asked me to bring you this,” Remus held out a cupcake with bright red frosting. Y/N took it happily and walked to the kitchen to set it on the counter. 

“Thank you, Moony. But, really, you guys didn’t have to. Sirius isn’t even here.” Y/N felt self conscious around her friends. She was wearing an old tee shirt from her early teens, a beloved Scooby-Doo tee with a rip in the left armpit, and black yoga pants. It was safe to say Y/N was more than ready to spend her birthday alone. 

“What do you mean, not here?” Remus was standing in the corner of the living room, flipping through Sirius and Y/N’s record collection. They had so many at this point that the couple was unsure which record belonged to who. 

“I don’t know, he left early this morning saying he got called into work. Something about an angry customer.” Y/N felt small under the group’s gaze. “I wasn’t really paying attention, I was half asleep.” 

Y/N watched as Lily and James shared a look. “I didn’t think the shop was open on Saturdays, but I guess they are.” Y/N’s shoulders lowered visibly, making Lily backtrack. “It’s the pregnancy brain, Y/N. I’ve been mixing things up for the past week and a half.” 

“Right, right. Of course. Um, how’s that going, by the way?” She crossed her arms across her stomach uncomfortably. 

“Oh, it’s going wonderful! We actually have something to give you, if that’s okay.” 

“Wait!” James cut in. “We should wait for Wormy to get here!” 

Lily hit his chest with the back of her hand. “Oh, come off it. You know how late he is to everything! Let’s do it now.” The couple led Y/N to the couch and sat on either side of her, both wearing matching shit-eating grins. Remus remained leaning against the wall, ready to flip the record when the time came. James placed a medium-sized purple box on her lap. 

Y/N carefully undid the wrapping paper, prompting James to let out a loud groan. 

“Any day now, woman!” 

Y/N giggled. “Hey! It’s my birthday! Be nice to me!” 

“I am being nice to you, Y/N! I gave you a present, didn’t I?” 

Y/N bumped her shoulder with his and reached into the box. Her fingertips met with the soft fabric of a tee shirt. Upon pulling the garment out completely, she observed that the words World’s Best Godmother was printed across the front. Immediately, Y/N dropped the shirt and covered her mouth with her hand. 

“Is that a yes?” Lily asked, her eyes tearing again. 

“Yes! Oh my god!” Y/N’s own tears trailed down her cheeks as she hugged both tightly. “Me? Godmother?” 

“I can’t think of anyone more worthy,” Remus remarked as he watched the heartwarming scene unfold in front of him. Y/N was so overwhelmed with joy that she had almost forgotten that Sirius was absent. Almost. 

The party went along swimmingly from there on out; Peter had arrived shortly after Y/N unboxed Remus’ gift, a new cauldron and potion ingredients, and another gift from the Potters, a pair of gorgeous black combat boots. The mousey-boy shuffled over to Y/N and handed her a small gift bag. 

“Oh? Thanks, Pete.” Y/N awkwardly pulled out the contents of the bag. “Oh, good, a gift card to Silver Sickle Bar and Eatery.” She tried to sound thankful towards the man in front of her, but the disdain was still evident in her voice. 

“Sirius said it was his favorite bar, so I thought you’d like it. Maybe we can grab some lunch there, obviously my treat,” He lazily gestures to the card in her hand. “We haven’t really hung out for a while. I figured it would be nice. If you don’t like it I can get you something diff-” 

Y/N cut him off with a hug, “Thank you, Peter, this was really thoughtful. Would next week work?” 

“Wednesday?” He wraps his arms around Y/N’s frame for a moment before letting go. 

“Wednesday works perfectly.” 

The four continued to hang out well into the night; laughing, chatting, drinking, listening to music, and playing board games. As the party dragged on, Y/N couldn’t help but grow worried about Sirius’ whereabouts. Her worries were harshly pushed aside, though, when Lily suggested they play poker. 

“Ugh, I fold.” Peter slams his cards down onto the coffee table and laid back onto the carpet in defeat. Y/N smirked at Remus, her only opponent, and gestured for him to show her his cards. 

“Straight, beat that,” Remus says confidently. James and Peter “oooh” childishly and looked towards Y/N. It was very apparent that all of them, besides Lily, were very buzzed. 

Y/N smirked and shook her head, “You play a hard bargain, Lupin. So good that I applaud you. But,” Y/N laid her hand on the table: four of a kind. “You’re just not good enough.” 

The room laughs as Y/N pulls the large pile of galleons, sickles, knuts and Lily’s wedding ring towards her. Y/N slips it onto her own ring finger and holds her hand as if to admire it. 

“Oh, Lily, dear, don’t you just adore my new ring? Look at how it glistens in the light!” 

The redhead rolls her eyes and snatches it off of Y/N’s finger. “I’ll just be taking that,” She puts it back on. 

“It will forever be known to be my legal property, Evans. Don’t forget it!” 

“Does that mean I’m married to both of you now?” James smiles a dopey grin and looks back and forth between the two women. Y/N pretends to gag. 

“On second thought, I surrender my rights to your ring.” 

The group continued their laughter until the front door of the flat swung open. A very drunk Sirius Black stumbled in the door, dumbfounded as to why all of his friends were in his house. 

“Why are you guys here?” Sirius slurred, pulling up the shoulder of his leather jacket. He bumped the record player in the process, making Go Your Own Way by Fleetwood Mac skip. 

“It’s Y/N’s birthday, Sirius,” Remus responded, his soft voice contrasting to his previously upbeat tone. Sirius slouched against the wall and slid down it until he hit the floor. 

“Y/N’s birthday...Y/N’s birthday...Oh! Y/N’s birthday! Was that today?” 

James was quick to jump into action. Propelling himself off of the couch, he took Sirius into his arms and brought him to a standing position. Sirius, of course, whined the entire way up, claiming that the floor wanted him to sit there. James responded with a small hum before peeling Sirius’ jacket off of his body and throwing it onto the kitchen counter. As Y/N watched, she couldn’t help but notice a bright pink smear on Sirius’ neck. 

“Yes, it’s today, you big goof. Where have you been?” 

Sirius went into a big flurry of words as James brought him towards the bedroom. Y/N thought she heard ‘And you should have seen her!’ amidst all the jumbled words, but she pied that off as her anxious imagination running awry. Lily’s hand found her back and she rubbed soothing circles on Y/N’s shoulder blades. 

“He forgot,” Y/N said to no one in particular. “I can’t believe he actually forgot.” 

“I’m sure he didn’t forget,” Lily soothed Y/N, rubbing circles into her shoulder blades. “He probably got carried away at happy hour, you know how he gets.” 

“Happy hour on Y/N’s birthday though?” Peter shook his head. Something about his tone didn’t sit well with Y/N. Lily shot a glare his way. 

The party did not last much longer; Remus said he had an interview with Dumbledore about a TA position at Hogwarts, Lily was tired, and Peter said that he was going on a mission tomorrow and needed rest. Y/N bid her friends farewell with large hugs and thank you’s. 

It’s safe to say that Y/N slept on the couch that night. 

~

Y/N awoke to sunlight in her eyes and a crick in her neck. The living room window wasn’t guarded with curtains, so even at the early hour of 4:30 AM, the room was illuminated with soft oranges, reds, and pinks. Y/N sat up and reached her hands above her head to stretch her back. She looks towards the bedroom door, listening for the soft snores of her boyfriend. Her neck screamed in agony, but she still stood and padded over to open the door. 

Y/N twisted the doorknob with care, trying to be as silent as humanly possible. She needed to see Sirius, not have a conversation with him. Alas, in all his glory, Sirius lied on his stomach with his mouth hung open and drool oozing onto the pillow. The girl admired how he looked as he slept; the sharp jaw, the perfect skin, the messy hair, the peaceful look gracing his features. He still wore his skinny jeans from the day previous, but at some point during the night, he discarded his white dress shirt. Y/N’s gaze darted around the floor until it landed on the crumpled fabric. 

Y/N glanced back at Sirius, admiring the artwork that filled his back. She remembered the day he got it; James cried when he first saw the gorgeous antlers. The low light highlighted the dark brown ink and seemed to make his skin appear airbrushed. Y/N smiled in spite of herself. 

Closing the door softly, Y/N walks into their small kitchen to prepare some tea in order to calm her nerves. The apartment was rather messy from the ‘party’ and Y/N had to dig through endless dirty dishes to find a mug clean enough to use. Y/N finally found one, a lavender mug that Marlene had given her for her 17th birthday, and set it on the counter while she filled the kettle. 

The kitchen wasn’t as dirty as Y/N previously thought. Sure, the sink was overflowing with dishes, but the kitchen itself was rather clean. And besides Sirius’ leather jacket, the counter was clear. The floor, though, was slightly sticky. Y/N sighs and flicks her wand; almost silently, the dishes start cleaning themselves. 

Y/N reaches for Sirius’ jacket, only to have a squishy substance fall onto her feet. She jumps back in surprise and disgust of the weird texture. But, the real panic sets in when she notices a big red spot on not only the floor but the leather jacket. Upon further investigation, Y/N realizes it’s the frosting from the cupcake Remus had given her. Sirius was very protective of this jacket and if he saw this, Y/N would be a dead man. So, she did the only reasonable thing she could think of: scrub the material with a wet paper towel. 

Thankfully, the frosting came off easily and didn’t stain the material. The only real obstacle was the sweet scent of the frosting lingering on the garment. Sirius had an insane sense of smell, so if he picked up even the slightest trail of sugar, Y/N would be busted. She delicately lifted the material to her nose. 

The musky scent of Sirius filled her nose as normal; leather, smoke, cologne, and spearmint. Y/N grinned at the familiar scent until she noticed a strong rose perfume almost ingrained into the leather. Y/N’s perfume smelled of vanilla. 

~

Y/N held her breath as she opened the door of the Silver Sickle, she was in no mood to see Vanessa again. All the same, Y/N put effort into her appearance just in case. She let out her breath when she noticed an old man behind the bar and Peter sitting in the corner. 

“Hey,” Y/N said breathlessly as she pulled out one of the wooden chairs and sat down. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t feel a little nervous meeting Peter alone; the two seemed to rekindle their friendship after he and Sirius fought. He promised that he was just drunk and not thinking, and Y/N not wanting to cause childish conflict within their friend group, had accepted his apology. 

“Hey!” He squeaked. “I didn’t know if you wanted to day drink or not, so I just ordered you a water to start off with.” 

Y/N laughed awkwardly. “Thanks, Wormy.” She took a long sip from her straw, trying to slow her nervous heart. “So, uh, how’s the academy? James said you are taking more and more missions with the order.” 

Peter nodded enthusiastically. “Oh, it’s great! Being an Auror is really fun, you really get to show people who’s boss, ya know?” 

“Um, I guess?” 

“I think they’re gonna kick me out, though. I haven’t done the best job at catching who I’m pursuing.” Peter raises his eyebrows and cocks his head to the side. 

“Oh? Why not?” Y/N glanced over the menu, only half listening to what her companion was saying. 

“I just like to play with them a ‘lil, like a cat and mouse. Except this time, I’m not the mouse.” 

Y/N looks at a delicious looking chicken sandwich on the menu and hums in response. 

“So, how are you and Sirius doing? It seemed pretty rough last week.” Peter takes a chunk of ice from his drink and starts chewing it. “If you want to talk about it, I guess.” 

This brings Y/N out of her sandwich-filled thoughts. “I don’t know, to be quite honest. We haven’t spoken much and I barely see him. He leaves early in the morning...comes home late at night…” Peter nods as if he was a therapist listening to a client. “I don’t want to assume the worst but he’s making it rather difficult.” 

“I wasn’t going to tell you this, because it isn’t really my business, but…” He comps down on the ice cube. “I was coming home from a mission a few nights ago and I saw him with a girl. I’m not quite sure what they were doing but it sure as hell didn’t look platonic.” 

Y/N felt her entire world shatter into her lap. “What?” 

“Yeah, I don’t know. She was really short with long black hair and a skimpy cocktail dress. They were walking into that club off of Coventry Street. I almost beat the fuck out of him right then and there, but there were bouncers.” 

Y/N bit her trembling lip and folded her hands in her lap. Rifling through her purse, she slammed the gift card down and stood. 

“Thanks for the lunch date, Peter, but I don’t feel well. I’ll talk to you later, yeah?” 

“Was it something I said?!” Peter yelled at Y/N’s retreating back as she left the bar. 

~

“Are you going somewhere?” Sirius asked, gesturing to Y/N’s packed suitcases by the door. 

“Yup, I’m going to France for a week to aid burn victims,” Y/N finished brushing her teeth before packing her toothbrush. “Didn’t think you’d care.” 

“Well, I do. You could have told me.” He leaned up against the wall and crossed his arms. 

“I would have if I actually saw you.” Y/N wasn’t in the mood to argue; she had about an hour before she had to leave, and she planned on using that time to relax with a cup of herbal tea. 

“What’s that supposed to mean? You see me plenty.” 

“Yeah, when you’re sleeping or showering. There’s not exactly time to chat when you leave early in the morning and come home well past midnight.” Y/N walked into the kitchen and cut a slice of bread. “Oh, by the way, Caspar brought up some sourdough, if you actually want any.” 

“Don’t change the subject like you always do, Y/N. I work hard to support us, you know that.” 

“I work hard too. And I get home before 11 every night. I’m not exactly sure how being a healer gets you home earlier than a tattoo artist, but whatever.” Y/N buttered her now toasted sourdough. 

“Sometimes a piece takes a long time, that’s not my fault! I’ve been getting big jobs recently! You should be happy for me!” 

Y/N let out a harsh laugh as she poured water into the kettle. “Do you really think I’m that fucking stupid, Sirius? Really?” 

“What do you mean? I think you’re rather smart.” Sirius followed Y/N into the kitchen and was leaning against the counter. 

“Yeah? Then why have you been lying to me for the past, I don’t know, two months?” 

“You can’t keep accusing me of things, Y/N. It’s not fucking fair!” Sirius stared holes into Y/N’s back. “For fucks sake! Look at me when I talk to you!” 

Y/N whipped around, her hair fanning around her face as she spun. “You know what’s not fucking fair? Letting a girl feel you upright in front of me. Lying about going into work. Forgetting my birthday and coming home from who knows where drunk as fuck with lipstick smeared all over your neck. Coming home drenched in another girl’s perfume. Taking your fucking side chick to a strip bar while I’m sat at home wondering if you’re fucking dead because we’re in the middle of a fucking war! You don’t know the first thing about fucking unfair!” 

“You’re not going to France, Y/N.” His jaw was clenched and his eyes held nothing but fire. The tone of his voice was like nothing she had ever heard before, at least not directed at her. He usually reserved it for people who yelled nasty things at her from the street, or when someone bad mouthed James. It felt foreign to hear him use it with her. Maybe she didn’t know him as well as she thought she did. “You’re not fucking going, and that’s final.” 

“What are you? My fucking mother? I’m going because I’m actually doing something good for the world, unlike your cheating ass.” Y/N pushed her way past her boyfriend and towards her luggage. 

“Don’t walk away from me!” Sirius followed her strides. He stopped and took a deep breath before continuing. “Y/N, darling, we need to talk about this-” His tone was notably softer than before as if he was trying to glue together shards of glass. 

“Talk about what, Sirius?! How you cheated on me and won’t even deny it? How you betrayed me in the worst way fucking possible? I’m not going to let you manipulate me into putting my career on the line to work out some issue you caused.” 

“What, so now I’m not important? You’re a fucking hypocrite!” 

“And how exactly am I a hypocrite, Sirius? You treat me like shit and whine that I’m done putting up with it? Gonna go cry to James about how you are so upset I wouldn’t hear you out after you cheat on me? Well, go the fuck ahead because James actually has a healthy relationship with a baby on the way. He won’t sympathize with you.” Y/N grabbed the handle of her suitcase and lifted her wand. “I’ll be back in a week and once we’ve had some time to cool off, we’ll talk about this like adults. I’ll see you soon.” 

Just as Y/N apperated out of the room, the kettle whistled and Sirius noticed Y/N left her half-eaten toast on the counter. 

~

It was near two in the morning when Y/N returned home from France the following week. The home was cold, dark, and vacant, and the entire appearance of the small flat had changed. In a week, Sirius had managed to completely trash the house. Even the smell of freshly baked goods was replaced with the sour smell of firewhisky and sex. 

Y/N ventured into the kitchen first, where she observed the large stack of dishes in the sink. Everything from to-go packages to their fine china (normal glass plates from the thrift) were stacked as high as the eye can see. Some were starting to mold and produce the most horrid smell. The stove housed the kettle where Y/N had left it, but this time it was cold and empty. Another pot that contained crusty spaghetti sat next to the kettle, and Y/N cringed at the thought of scrapping it out. She moved to the counter where her toast, now stale, sat. Y/N picked it up between two fingers and threw it into the bin. 

She carried on into the living room next. The couch cushions were tossed about the room and the small fur throw was draped across the back of the couch. The record player in the corner still held the Fleetwood Mac record Moony had chosen on her birthday as if it were a time capsule; Y/N couldn't help but reminisce about how happy she was with her friends that evening. Maybe that proved that she could be happy without Sirius in her life, or maybe it served as a constant reminder that he was woven into every aspect of it. 

Again, the room was covered with food wrappers and alcohol bottles. Y/N feared the liquid that remained in the bottles would leak and stain the carpet, so before moving on to the bedroom, she set each one upright. 

The bedroom was what Y/N feared the most; without her presence in the home, Sirius could have been intimate with an infinite amount of girls in her own bed. She shivered at the thought but pushed on and reached towards the icy doorknob. 

The room was the cleanest out of the entire flat, just various clothes scattered around the floor and a messy bed. Y/N wanted nothing more but to curl up under her warm covers and press her face into the chest of the man she loved most, but that was an impossible task. He didn’t love her anymore and that was something she had to deal with, she just wished she had savored the last time he held her. 

As Y/N explored further into the room, her feet found an article of clothing that neither Sirius nor Y/N owned. Bending at the hips to pick it up, Y/N held a red, lacy v neck bra in between her fingertips. Y/N fingered the material with teary eyes. Another step forward and her feet came into contact with the matching bottoms. Y/N laid the set out neatly on the bed and wallowed; it must have looked stunning on her. 

Y/N walked to the desk, where an ink well was left open and a half-written letter laid face up on the surface. She capped the ink with a wet chuckle. 

“You need to cap your ink, Sirius. If you don’t it’ll dry out. I won’t be there forever to do it for you.” Y/N said aloud, wiping her running nose. She picked up the letter against her better judgment and began to read. 

Prongs,

I know you’re mad at me, but please just hear me out. Vanessa is gorgeous, mate. She’s sweet and nice, but at the same time she's so witty and smart-mouthed. She even listens to Queen and the Weird Sisters!

She made me believe in love at first sight, JP. 

I’m going to marry her one day, mark my words!

The ink began to run as Y/N read and cried, making small blotches of black contrast against the stark white paper. Y/N placed it onto the table and gripped the edge to steady herself. Never in her 21 years on earth had she ever felt such pain, such sorrow. Her pains were usually cushioned by Sirius’ arms and sweet slurred language in the middle of the night, or by her friends’ loud cackles. But this time, this time was different; she was alone, completely and utterly alone. 

Y/N looked to the wall in order to ground herself; a small sliver of silver moonlight slashed against the wall, illuminating the otherwise dark room. Y/N traced the line with her eyes until she landed on the wooden coo-coo clock. 

The clock was one of Sirius’ most prized possessions; it was a gift from his Uncle Alphard that he received when he ran away from the Black family.  Alphard was one of the few Sirius still kept in contact with, and he was a big role model to Sirius when he grew up. Debatably, Alphard was the one who taught Sirius how to be a man. 

The present seemed lame on the surface, but that clock was one of Sirius’ favorite things when he was a child. Sirius had told stories of the long afternoons he would spend in front of the clock, waiting for the small, yellow bird to pop out of the top while Walburga and Orion fought in the background. Y/N respected Alphard with all of her being, but she wanted nothing more than to smash that godforsaken clock. She wanted to destroy everything that made Sirius happy, she wanted him to be under the same pain he was putting her through.

Y/N knew what she had to do at that very moment: she had to get out of London and move far, far away. So far away that no one would ever find her. So, she grabbed the extra suitcases in the flat and began to pack her things. 

Starting at the record corner, she picked every single one of her belongings and shoved them into her suitcase. Y/N had to shrink a few of her belongings, such as the couch, in order to fit, but in a little less than an hour, every hint of Y/N was packed away in three large suitcases. 

Y/N gave one last look at the apartment before apparating to Paris, where she knew she could start a better, more meaningful life. Maybe, she could even find a fresh bakery to supply her with warm loaves of sourdough bread. 

When Sirius returned to the flat the following morning, the only remaining aspects of Y/N were a striped scarf and two galleons folded neatly on the bed next to Vanessa’s lingerie. 

[wenwenbittercake]

✨AIZAWA X READER✨

(Thank you so much for reading my fan fiction. There's not much fluff. A little bit of smut so you know. Also swearing. If you can't take teacher x reader plsss don't read this.)

You just started UA and the first thing you realize was you're tall handsome teacher with long wavy black hair. You seated at the corner of the class giving you a perfect view of your teacher.

" Good morning everyone my name is Shouta Aizawa you can call me mr. Aizawa. From now on I'll be your homeroom teacher so no funny business around me." he said as he gave a smirk to the class making everyone giggle but it's a smirk you will remember for the rest of your life.

You watched him carefully as he teach but your mind is not on the subject but on him. To be honest he's the most handsome guy you have ever seen in your life. His facial features and his body is perfect. Like an angel that fall from Heaven, his voice is like music to your ears. No voice in this world can calm you down like this. He always wear baggy clothes but you wonder, how much muscles are he hiding behind those clothes. Huge rule at your teacher has veiny strong hands, you wish he didn't you down with then.

The Best Is Yet To Come, when you and your class practice on the field, I saw our would roll his sleeves up to his elbow, showing his car covered on once he wore a sleeveless shirt causing you to have a nose bleed. It was embarrassing but it's worth it.

Because of this, you start to lack on his subject making aizawa move you to sit in front of his desk. This gave you a chance to admire him close. His scar Place perfectly under his right eye, and his eyes, those pitch dark eyes that you got hypnotized even though he's not using his quirk.

"RingggRingggRinggg!" The bell rang and everyone in the class run for their lives to the cafeteria, except you, he got out last so you could admire your teacher till the last minute.

"Y/N can you meet me in my office after school, we need to talk about your grace." He said with disappointment that makes you feel guilty for a moment.

You nodded and left. It's 3 p.m. and students are running towards they're busses or walking back home. Except you, you are now standing in front of mr. Aizawa's office. Your fingertips are cold. You realize that you're great start to descend but it stops at Bs or Cs. You're really nervous about this. Before you knock on the door you heard...

"Come in."

You walk in, closing the door behind you quietly, and set on the seat in front of his desk. He sign and passed you a pile of paper. These are your current test scores and they are filled with Fs. You feel like the blood from your body has been drained.

"Y/N, do you know if you keep on going like this you will fail on the finals."

"I-i know." You look down on the table not being able to look him in the eyes.

All of a sudden, he walk up to your seat, placing his right hand on the table and his left on the back of your chair. His face so dangerously close to yours. Look you straight in the eyes and said..

"So tell me, what's distracting you so much?" Does he know? No way.

"Umm-i"

"Tell me what's more interesting then my lesson?hmm?" You look away. Your face is as red as a tomato.

"Tell me!" He raised his voice a little making you jolts and panic. You can't think straight anymore. How would you reply? And then... It happened.

Your soft Rosy lips touches his. When you realize what's going on you jolted back. You look him in the eyes. He looked shocked. Out of words and look at you like WTF happened? What have you done? You just read your relationship with your teacher. What do you expect him to do, kiss you back? Tears start to fall, due to the embarrassment and sadness.

"I-i'm so sorry." You said as you run out of the office.

The next morning was awkward you can't even look him in the eyes.

"RinggRinggggRingg!"

"Y/N can we talk for a moment?" You weren't expecting that from him, after what happened. You walk towards his chair what's up your eyes fixed on the marble floor and your hands behind your back.

"So about yesterday.."

"Right, he'll be having extra classes with me, I will help you with the failing grades. " you look surprised and happy in the same time. You got to see him more.

"Really?"

" yep, is your homeroom teacher, it's my responsibility to teach you, isn't it?" He gave you a slide smirk. You blush that it an attempt to hide it.

"A-about yesterday."

"Oh don't worry about it." You look shocked. Really? He really don't mind? Of course, and his eyes you're just a naive little child, nothing much.

"However..." he said as he pull you towards him, making you fall on his chest, positioning you to sit on his lap, facing him.

"...we need to work on that kiss of yours."

"B-but this is wrong."

"I know, but it feels so good, doesn't it?" He whispered into your ears in a deep voice making you want to melt in his hands.

You've been in this little Affair for 2 years. However, you feel like time flies faster when you're beside him. You want to be with him till the end. You know this relationship won't last but you still hope it did. You gave all of you to aizawa. Every inch of your body and soul. You love him a lot. Your grades got higher even though you didn't do much work. Every day, you come to school just to meet Mr aizawa. You were loved, you are appreciated, feelings that you never felt before. He told you you were his everything, but sometimes he gave you looks as if. .. he regrets it. No way, why should he regretted it feels so good doesn't it?

Your graduation got nearer and Shouta has been ignoring you for these past couple of days. You didn't get the wink when he passes you or private lessons that you crave to have. He wouldn't call you or text you anymore. Even if you sent him photos and text messages. You felt hurt a little. Maybe it's because then final exams are getting close. Or maybe because he's just busy. He felt neglected. Is he bored of me? Does he not like me anymore? But he said I'm his everything. Is it because I'm not pretty enough but he said I'm perfect. The thoughts filled in your head as you walked toward his office. As you are about to knock the door, you heard. ..

"I'm coming home early today."

"Hmm, I promise I won't be late this time."

"Hahah I know I know."

"Yea love you bie." Aizawa said as he ends the call.

You feel the similar cold feeling. Is he meeting other people? Is it his wife? Wait he's married? Who is this person he's talking to? Maybe his family member? Am I not good enough did I do something wrong?

"Y/N" you snap out of your thoughts but I saw was voice. He look like he's ready to go back home.

" ..you're supposed to be home 30 minutes ago. What are you doing here?"

" I thought we were supposed to have our tutor session today?"

"Oh-um no need for that, your grades not bad these days, I don't think you need them anymore."

Is he fucking serious? Why is he playing dump now? You didn't even let anything in tutor sessions, are you both do is fuck. Tears start to fall from your eyes. You know this wouldn't last, why are you crying now?

"Y/N are you alright?" He asked does he pull you into the office. He locked the door behind him and knocks you what's going on but you wouldn't listen. You start to strip in front of him.

"W-wait, not today I gotta go somewhere."

" I thought anything can wait if it's me?" You said as he drop on your knees and start to take off his belt.

"W-wait but this is important!"

" I thought I'm the most important thing in the world?" You said as you slip his cock into your mouth.

"W-wait auhhh."

The graduation music plays outside the school. Every student is happy, taking photos with their friends and families. Not you though.

"W-what are you say?"

" it hurts to say this but we need to stop this relationship. It's not healthy anyways." You can't believe what you just heard. Said by a men who promise to never leave you behind.

"Wait did I do something wrong? I promise I can fix it, please just don't leave me." Uhealth on mr. Aizawa has arm like your life depends on it. The last thing he wants to do is to make you cry but he knows he has to end this fast. He hugs you tightly.

" no no, it's not your fault it's mine. I'm so sorry." He hugs you tightly. You cried into his shoulder. It hurts a lot.

"Just forget about everything, just pretend nothing ever happened. Could you do that for me?" How could you forget all of it and live on a normal life. These are the things you can never forget even if you try to. But you just want to make him proud, so your nodded hesitantly.

"Good girl." He said as he kiss your tears away.

"O-only if we do it one last time.. Please?" He's not expecting that from a shy girl like you. He expect him to say no but...

"How can I say no when you asked me so nicely. " he said I should look around and pull you into the nearest classroom.

It's been weeks since you've seen Aizawa. He stops replying your text and stop picking up your calls. You missed him so much. You want to see him again even though you promised not to. The tightening feeling on your chest wouldn't come off unless you see him. Your friends realize this so they call you to meet them at a mall. You've been ignoring your friends for a really long time so you decided to go with them this time. He stood in front of a cupcake shop. Waiting for your friends who are always late. You look around to find them and then you saw it, that wavy dark hair you used to play with, that pitch dark eyes you adore.

"Shouta!" Can't think straight anymore, you only know you want to touch him you miss him you need him. You hug him tightly.

"I missed you!"

"Y/N!" He didn't hug you back like he used to.

"Sho who's this?" A woman voice appeared behind him.

"Oh-um this is my student that recently graduated." He said as he looked at you like a stranger. A person he never met before.

"Oh how sweet. Hi my name is wife/name. I'm your teacher's wife."

"Umm nice to meet you."

"Um-oh I forgot. We have to go to the doctor's office soon." He said as he pulled his wife hand and walk away. Didn't even bother to say goodbye. From a distant you heard...

"Sho why u being so rude. She seems close to you."

"Oh it's nothing, she's just a student from my class, nothing special."

Nothing special? He dropped to the ground. The world around you crashes. Nothing special? Is this what he sees you all the time. All the love, all the kisses, all the sex. They are all fake. When he said you're his world, his everything, his only one. They're all lies. How stupid of you to not notice that he used you all this time? You are nothing to him. You are nothing more than a play thing for him. You're nothing more than a pet. A teacher's pet.

(Dammm this fan fiction hit hard. I'm sorry that I didn't put explicit smut. I just don't like writing them. I write this fan fiction to explain that teacher x student stuff can end in bad ways. Sorry that this is not the spicy stuff you all use to read. I hope you all can for give and thank you for read. 😓😓🙏🙏🙏💗💕💕💗✨✨✨)

(Ik this man would never do something like that😭😭)

[local-trash69]

Office (SMUT)

Jake Muller x female!reader

Y/N tossed a paper ball at Jake for millionth time in boredom, the male growls getting frustrated with his girlfriend as he tries to focus on his work.

"Oh for fucks sake! Y/N, stop it!" he barked at her.

"What?" she was unamused and extremely bored.

"Jake. Your always busy and you never have time to talk to me or spend time with me" the female looks down.

Jake sighs, knowing she is right and immediately regrets making her feel lonely. He had been caught up with work and basically drowned himself in work that he hasn't realized how lonely his princess was.

He placed his pen down and turns his attention to the H/C haired female that played with her hands as she avoided his gaze apon her.

"Is it because I'm not pretty anymore? Or have you found someone else? Are you with Sherry?" she asked, tears ready to spill out of her eyes.

His eyes widens at her questions then realized what she felt like. He rose from his chair and made his way to his girlfriend then sat down next to her, his gaze on her lap where her hands are and he slowly touches her hand.

"Princess... I'm sorry I made you feel like this. I got caught up in work that I failed to realize that I neglected you and it was wrong of me" he says, the words fell out of his mouth which was music to her ears but she needs his attention now more than ever.

"And no. I didn't find anyone new for me and I'm not with Sherry-" because he could finish his sentence, she kisses him.

He was stunned but kisses her, thier lips moving in sync. He lays down, thier lips stayed in the passionate kiss as she was on top of him. He loved it when she was on him, his hands placed on her hips.

She pulls away and looks at her boyfriend, looking at his facial features. His hidden dimples and the scar on his cheek that made him handsome, secretly turning her on. His beard was beginning to regrow but was hard to see since it's camouflaged with his skin. His baby blue eyes that always makes her knees weak and his soothing deep voice that always makes her wet.

Y/N becomes shy with his touch and placed her hands on his chest as she grinds against his crotch area. He shuts his eyes and enjoys the feeling, he missed the feeling of his lover grinding against him.

He rubs against her, moaning as his crotch hardens. She took her clothes off, revealing her body to him, he reaches up and touches her breasts as he missed the feeling of her soft and fragile breast in his large hands.

He quickly unties his pants and pushed down his boxers, excited about getting to connect with his princess again, to feel her again. Her hands roams his muscular chest as she looks into his eyes.

"Someone is excited" She giggles.

"Whatever" he rolls his eyes, jokingly.

He slowly slides his cock into her and she gasps because she forgot about how big and thick his cock was, the way his cock slides into her and how deep it goes inside her. It was like she was experiencing him again.

"Damn baby girl" he moans.

He starts thrusting into her, she moans and enjoys the feeling of his cock stretching and rubbing against her tight walls that squeezes his hard cock.

"Fuck daddy" she moans.

With each thrust she felt a spark inside her, butterflies in her stomach, her mind blank, her pleasured moans falling from her mouth and her hands holding onto him for support.

The couple missed the feeling of thier skins touching and rubbing against its each other, thier moans, the pleasuring feeling, the feeling of thier orgasims approaching them, the adrenaline and hunger for each other.

His thrusting began to pick up pace and soon his cock made her scream in pleasure, he loved hearing her moan or scream his name in pleasure.

"Daddy! I'm close-I want to cum! Please cum inside me!" she moans out loud.

She wanted him, she needed him to release inside of her, she want to feel his love again. She was desperate for his attention and wants him, only him. She felt a knot in her stomach and her lover picked up the pace.

Y/N moaned his name as she tightened around his cock, Jake felt the sensation and he knew he was close. He missed the feeling of his lovers sweet angelic moans and the way she claws on his back when she wants him.

"Daddy! Yes! Oh my God!" She moans.

"I'm gonna cum! Oh fuck!" He buries his head into her neck as he felt his cum leave his body and enter his lover.

Y/N felt his warm seed cover her walls and fill her up. He pushed himself up slightly, his lover rested on his chest and looked at her tired expression which he found it very hot, cute and something he hasn't seen in a long time.

"Jake-"

"It's okay baby girl, get some rest" he gently touched her cheek and watches as she closed her eyes, drifting off to sleep.

Jake sat up and pulls her into his arms, watching her sleep, knowing she got his attention again. He takes his jacket and wraps it around her, making sure that she was warm.

[katesthoughtsonthis]

FROM BLOOD AND ASH - JENNIFER L. ARMENTROUT

Like I and many other people, I found this book thru TikTok. I was skeptical at first because I hadn’t read a proper book since before starting college circa 2013. I decided to give it a try after finding it eight - ten - thousand times on my fyp. I went straight to my nearest barnes and noble and for the life of me couldn’t find it. Now mind you this was March 2021. At this point, the whole of the world had found out about this book. I got lucky though, I found one… in a B&N about 30 minutes away from my house. you bet your ass I hauled my tuckus there. As soon as I got it in my hands, let’s just say it was a bit of a downward spiral from then on. Anyways, enough of my rambling. Let’s get to the good parts. I will make this as spoiler free as I can as possible.

The PLOT

Goodness gracious did it pack a punch straight away. Good lord the brothel scene. I was assaulted right away with my senses. The strong need to be touched by this mysterious man. Just when it was about to get to the good part it was ripped away. Then the real world building begins. So, initially starting this book, I actually didn’t know that this was going to be a six part book. I thought to myself, here we go with the world building. Now I like world building; but when it becomes long and winded, you lose me. I like that it gave me a good position about what the MC role was in life. What I appreciated was that we didn’t necessarily get ML back into the picture until a few chapters in. He was introduced much later in the chapters. Not so much so that you forgot him. Then the challenge of the minds. What New Adult book would not have a ML challenge the views of MC? Additionally, what New Adult book would not have the palpable sexual tension between the two characters. I loved every minute of it. Then the scene where MC’s true character was brought out was heartbreaking. I felt myself shed a few tears. The escape and the twists was breathtaking. I loved loved loved the slow realization of MC about ML. The twist bro the twist.

The Characters

Poppy (Penelaphe) Balfour

Can I just say that with NA genre books, I am appreciative of the fact that the main girls are not always skinny white girls with facial expressions like a gnat? I’m tired of it. She thicc like a honeydew; if god was a woman *wink wink*. Anyways, I like the fleshing out of her character. I’m just surprised she’s not more traumatized by the abuse she suffered at the hands of her captors. As someone who works closely with mental health disorders, I’m surprised that there wasn’t a scene where an object or word or action was a trigger for her. It was more stereotypical that she “got past it” and was stronger. Like no sweetheart, someone as abused as you should have it least some sort of response from the abuse. Maybe it was her need to stab every one around her? I like the description of her features. It’s interesting to me. To me, she could have been a little bit more scarred to bring more reality to it rather than it being an accessory that still looked pretty on her. Ok now I hear myself. It seems I’m just attacking at every hole I see. I like Poppy. I wish I was Poppy. Mostly because I want Hawke, but also for the red hair and the powers. Mostly for Hawke let’s be honest.

Also kudos to the artists that made these fanarts. This rendition of Poppy is amazing. Majority of the fanarts I’ve seen the Veil is too sheer. It was meant to fully cover her because the captors did not want a reminder of what she really was. Granted the mouth and nose should be covered too. But them thigh tho. They are thicc.

Art by Loweana

Hawke Flynn

LORD HELP ME. THIS MAN IF FIIIIIOOONE. UH GOD - can I have one too. hahaha. This has got to be the best fanart for what Hawke looks like. The FUCKING DIMPLE. I like that a lot of women who read NA genre are like yep these men need dimples and the authors agreeeeeed. Anyways, I like the cunningness of his character - and his cunnilingus. hahahahahahahaha. Ok, I have to reign myself in now. So Hawke is the MAN. That ain’t no boy. That is a MAN. I like that he doesn’t shy away from his attraction to Poppy nor is he unwilling to not challenge her beliefs on the status quo.

Art by Jeleynai

Conclusion

I bought the rest of the series at that time. which was just its sequel Kingdom of Flesh and Fire. I will do a post of this one down the line. As well as the sequel to that one; The Crown of Gilded Bones. I am fully committed to this series. I bought the FairyLoot version of the series as well as the Illumicrate. I got the Illumicrate one just last week and it is GORGEOUS, but because I am an incredibly (begrudgingly) nice person. I gave the Illumicrate one to my Aunt/Best Friend (she’s only a couple years older than me, I was an oopsie baby). I kept the rest of the stuff though. The blanket came in handy for a road trip I took with family and boyfriend the next couple of days later. I’m still waiting on the FairyLoot which I hear is coming soon. Oh, also I can’t wait for the next book coming out in Feb 2022 and its companion book in Oct 2021!

This definitely gave me a book hangover though. Could not recover for WEEKS.

[cursoulla]

Just sum KakaKabu body headcanon things!

Scroll for brief explanation/description. (These are personal thoughts/ please don’t @ me or whatever)

For Kakashi I imagine stronger facial features. More angular I guess. Sharp jawline, straight nose + high nose bridge. Slightly pointed ears hehe

And for Kabuto, a softer jawline but still prominent, cheeks a little rounder. Small concaved nose. Naturally frowning or pouting lol.

Kabuto I feel would be more on the lean fit side. I just try to think about it from what I’ve seen in the show. He doesn’t fight too much, really. Raised to be a spy and specializes in medical ninjutsu. And for majority of his life after joining Orochimaru his work and roll is primarily in the lab so I can’t imagine him being too built but that could just be me. Of course he’s still strong though. Obviously. Since he still does do secretive missions etc behind the scene and does know how to fight very well. Oh and I saw some official art where his ribs are visible ? so added that. Anyways, his frame is slightly smaller. Thinking his legs and forearms are noticeably slender. Hm, prominent hip bones and very slight waist. Oh and his skin is basically flawless since he never really allows a wound to last on himself.

Kakashi I would think has more of a build to him. He’s a jonin, teacher/leader, on his feet a lot. Always participating in training and on missions. Plus, been a shinobi all of his life, flew by and graduated as a jonin at like what ...thirteen.. fourteen years old? Now he’s sTRONK. I don’t imagine him working out during free time though. He just wouldn’t lol. It’s his everlasting years as a teacher that keeps him up and going. Anyways, thick thighs! Very strong legs. His core muscles aren’t visible 24/7 probably he’s just flexing in this picture lol. Broader frame / collarbone with a narrower waist! Defined biceps and v-line. And. Hehe. Pecs. * Grabs them * oh and his skin has beauty marks ! In all sorts of places ! And battle scars but I forgot to draw them... Cause yes...

This is just how it is in my brain.

Adding hands was unessessary but I did it anyways :P! They look the same cause I’m bad at visually depicting differences so I wrote little captions to help lol.

Kakashi’s hands are bigger in general and fit easily around Kabuto’s wrist. Hmmm I also like to think his fingers are thicker but slightly shorter than Kabuto’s. Rough hands? A bit calloused. I feel like his hands are the first thing to tense when he’s anxious.

Kabuto’s fingers are slender and a little longer than Kakashi’s. Wrists very thin. His palm is wider, but his fist is small. Soft hands because moisturizing. His smol fist packs violent punches and will knock you the fuck out though so be careful.

Thanks for tuning into my nonsense rambles!