#ONE OF THEM SEEMED GENUINELY AFRAID THAT I MIGHT ACTUALLY KILL HER

[icannotgetoverbirds]

fun fact! did you know that reddit reading comprehension is at least almost as abysmal as tumblr reading comprehension? they aren't any better than us!

[sadokasochism]

I am destroyed over the whole god/worshipper dynamic and have no idea how to adequately put it into words.

I mentioned in another post that Mizi could not fathom Sua ACTUALLY dying, or comprehend what death really meant, and attributed this to her relatively comfortable and sheltered life as the pet of Shine. She was not taught to conceptualise death as a loss, and she never faced any opposition to that world view. From what we know, she might have never really known true, lasting pain or loss before the end of Round 1.

However, her reaction could also be due to her placing Sua on a pedestal as her personal god and universe. She viewed Sua as her absolute everything, and why would any faithful worshipper believe their god could be killed? Only, while Sua was everything to HER, that perception did not carry over to their captors. Mizi's love and devotion was not enough to save Sua. Forces stronger than them both took her away like she was nothing.

How must Mizi have felt, having her perception of Sua as the centre of the universe shattered that way? Coming to the violent realisation that Sua was just another human, and that humans are indeed that vulnerable and disposable? That Sua could now only exist in memories and in the visions that haunt her? That Sua is not a god, but a ghost?

Now we look at Till's perception of Mizi. Again, in an earlier post I mentioned the tragedy of Till falling for someone who did not have a reason to leave. He had a lot of blind faith in Mizi, and it could be said that he idealised her as a paragon.

It's not hard to see how he reached this point. The poor kid had not been shown a lot of kindness in his life, and so meeting someone who was genuinely good and so full of joy must have had a huge impact on him.

However, his faith is still a blind one, but in a different way to Mizi's blind faith in Sua. He is happy to endure any amount of horrible treatment and does not expect anyone to help him. He doesn't resent Mizi for being so close to their captors, for her dreams stopping at Alien Stage. He doesn't resent her after he gives up on his chance at freedom and is subjected to who knows how many more years of pain and torment at the hands of their captors (Not that Mizi is at fault, Till made his own decision that Mizi likely never even knew about).

He sees Mizi's innocence and ignorance to the cruelty of their reality as something wonderful instead of a character flaw that prevents her from saving herself or her loved ones.

Sua has the same issue, seeking comfort and bliss within Mizi's brightness instead of acknowledging the cruel reality of their world. Maybe she felt sharing her perspective with Mizi would dim Mizi's bright spirit, and so she was more than content to wait out the clock with her god.

Maybe Sua felt that meeting Mizi, loving her and being loved by her in return, was nothing short of a miracle after the life she had lived before Anakt Garden. Maybe she felt in light of that, aspiring for something like freedom or a long, long life of happiness with the person she loved the most was asking far too much. The time she got with Mizi was already a miracle, why expect or demand anything more?

If Sua was afraid of Mizi losing her brightness, no wonder she was so affected by Ivan's lecture about becoming a source of trauma for Mizi after her death.

Ivan's view of Till as his god is a bit different. He is similar in that he doesnt seem to demand his devotion be reciprocated, he just wants his god to acknowledge him as a person, as someone that is at least PART of Till's universe, if he can't be all of it.

He is also very willing to become a martyr for his god while expecting nothing in return but Till continuing to live. He acknowledges Till as vulnerable and falable in a way that Till doesn't with Mizi, and Mizi didn't with Sua. He knows damn well that while Till is the centre of HIS universe, their captors certainly do not hold Till in that same regard. He knows that love and devotion in a vacuum does not save anyone.

Which is why he was always the one to free Till, to try and escape with him, and why he pulled the stunt he did in Round 6. Ivan knew that actually making an impact in this world required personal risk and sacrifice, because their captors don't give a fuck if you're in love or if that other pet-human they're about to kill means everything to you.

Till knew this too, but his idealised version of Mizi is too perfect to be broken and beaten down by this world the same way the rest of them have been. So he's still shattered by Round 5, seeing how far Mizi has fallen and then not knowing if she's alive or dead, but knowing for sure she is far out of reach. I wonder, did he regret not running away with Ivan at that point? Did he wonder what all those years of suffering were for, if he was just going to end up losing Mizi anyway? If this world was able to break her too, no matter what he did?

Mizi is gone and changed forever, and nothing he did could stop it. His love and devotion and sacrifice wasn't enough. He failed his god.

In Round 6, Ivan is faced with the same thing. His god has lost his fighting spirit, is changed forever, and Ivan's love and devotion wasn't enough to save him. The last thing he can give is his life, and hope that will be enough. Just like Sua. But he was never Till's god, was never even part of his universe, he probably won't even leave a ghost behind. So, the choice is obvious, really.

They're all so desperate for hope and connection in this lonely, painful existence that they make a person their entire universe, and then are repeatedly crushed when they are shown again and again that their soul-consuming love for one another is seemingly meaningless in a world that views them as infinitely disposable.

[elsa-fogen]

Oh, Husk and Alastor?

Their dynamic is also pretty interesting, they kinda feel like two people who everyone thinks gets along great and are the best of friends. While in reality their friendship is fueled but a fire born from their hatred. They just have many decent moments and have a easy time understanding each other, through they often use that information to serve a selfish endeavor.

Like Alastor would mess with Husk, tease him and Husk would tell Al to get his act together so that he(Husk) doesn't have to deal with some sort of fallout (ref. when Mimzy comes by)

In general, I feel like they do get along really well, but they are in no way friends. Kinda like how you can get along well with your boss, but wouldn't really consider them a friend. And you wouldn't really want them to involve themselves in your life, but that doesn't stop Alastor. (Social conversions? What's that)

This also makes me curious, wonder what kind of dynamic Husk has with Rosie, or rather, how do you think Rosie sees Husk? Just like a pet Alastor has? Or does she actually see the person that is there? (Leaning more towards her not really seeing Husk more than a errand boy or pet of Alastor)

Though it would be fun if the first time Husk meet Rosie he thought that she might actually be willing to help him because she gives of the energy of being a very kind person around people she cares about (aka Alastor). So he tries to talk to her without Alastor present and he finally understands how they get along so well, they are both the same kind of crazy ᵔᵜᵔ

So, um- what are your thoughts on the dynamic between Alastor and Husk?

HEEEHEHHE YOU GOT ME A REASON TO TALK ABOUT MY FRESH HEADCANON ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIPS

OKAY SO!!

I saw a theory that Husk had children when he was alive. Keep that in mind, it's a secret tool we wanna use later

So, little bit about Alastor. He is not the guy who owns many souls. In fact, he doesn't own any (well... i have some headcanons, but it's for another time). The only soul he has is Niffty, and she's... she's whole another level.

So one day Alastor get's Husk's soul in posession and he has no idea what to do with him. Their contract is basically "you'll have to do anything i order you" but it doesn't set any boundaries for Husk. So he can insult Alastor, argue with him and so on. The only thing he cant is to try to kill Alastor, but it's obvious.

So, Alastor's just... drags him around, and Husk has to just be there all the time, and watch Alastor do stupid shit without thinking, being manipulated by Mimzy into some shenanigans and so on, because he's too powerful, kinda don't afraid of anything and little bit unhinged. And Husk is trying to be that voice of sanity for Alastor (and maybe Niffty). Like in canon, he tries to warn Alastor about Mimzy nd at some point seems genuinely worried about him. Just a bit. And also, in that scene in final song, when Alastor appears again, Husk doesn't seem happy but still goes for group hug.

I think he sees Alastor as a child he has to babysit, but the child is so spoiled, that he doesn't give a shit about his warnings. Maybe Al reminds him of his own children at some degree. And so Husk is attached to Alastor in some weird unhealthy way, he cares about him and tries to protect, even if it pointless.

The worst part of it is that Alastor doesn't see him more than funny fluffy cat-guy-pet. He almost never takes him seriously and doesn't listen to what he says. So Husk may try to reach out to Rosie, to make her to reason with Alastor. But she's basiclly "i could fix him, but whatever is wrong with him is way funnier". I think she listens to Husk's worries about another Alastor's scheme, but she also trusts Alastor? I mean, she belives that he'll be fine. But if something seems to dangerous, she can agree and talk to Alastor.

After all, Husk was an overlord, and i think Rosie could know him before he made a deal with Alastor. So, i think she doesn't think of Husk as just Al's pet, she knows who he is. After all, not every sinner can become an overlord. But still,

So, last thing. I saw that one comic where after episode 5 Alastor admits that Husk was right about Mimzy and i really love this thought. I think Alastor also likes Husk's presence at some degree. Maybe they could build something healtier, maybe Alastor, after losing part of his powers, would listen to Husk more. But still it's all fucked up while Alastor owns his soul.

And also, i'd really love to see something of just Alastor, Husk and Niffty getting into some shenanigans together, this would be so much fun. Al and Niff who are just 2 unhinged gremlins and Husk who's done with their shit, but still cares about them and can't just leave, and it's not because of the deal. Like i imagine when husk is trying to reason with Alastor that he's about do something stupid and dangerous and Alastor's like well i don't force you to follow us this time, but Husk still goes with them because who else would watch after these two idiots?

So i think, i get your point about them!

[ashdreams2023]

Hello! It's me again :)). Whenever you're free, could please do a Lucius x younger sister!reader? Where The two of them really has a special bond that makes Lucius very protective over her. What happens when Lucius caught his sister kissing Sev? Sev and reader have been secretly dating for months now.

Hi! Of course I’ll try my best

Severus snape x reader

Lucius malfoy & sister reader

Losing game

"Malfoy come on! Your sister is an absolute ba-" the ravenclaw boy swallowed back his words when the end of Lucius’s wand pressed into his throat.

"Dare complete that statement and feel the pain of a million electric shocks you’ll wish you were never born"

"Bloody hell mate what are you doing?!" The ravenclaw’s friend dragged him away and almost stumbled while doing so. Lucius had it up to the top of his head, why can’t these boys understand that none of them is worth the time of day of his sister.

You’re a malfoy for Merlin’s sake, isn’t that enough to make it clear that you’re a lady with class who wouldn’t put up with their pathetic tries to smooth talk you.

"Lucius I understand that you’re protective of her but don’t you think it would be better to give her the decision instead of scaring off every guy who’s shows the slightest interest in her?"

"Cissa she’s my only sister and I know how boys her age are, they are only after one thing and I don’t want her to get hurt….I have to make sure she’s safe and happy you know that, right?" Narcissa sighed, she understood, from the very beginning he made it clear how important you are to him, how he will kill anyone who just looks at you in a weird way.

You and lucius were very close, he was your shield that protected you from day one, from his father that wanted tried promising you to an awful pureblood that only cared about heirs.

"Ok but at least talk with her, she’s your sister and she’s not a baby anymore, I’m sure she at least like one person" Narcissa hoped she wouldn’t regret this, you made her promise not to tell but it was serious getting stupid.

"Fine, I’ll go talk to her now"

"Great!"

Let’s go severus can defend himself…

It took lucius using a tracking spell to locate you and when he finally found you his words stopped in his throat, what were you doing?!

Sitting there all cozy with severus, the genius potions boy, actually not just potions but that has nothing to do with his point, the point was that you were going behind his back and seeing severus because friends don’t just kiss each other or blush at closeness.

Why would you do something like this?! Were you not afraid of father’s furry and the punishment he might bestow upon you? Severus was a half blood, Merlin lucius is gonna have a heart attack.

He stomped his way towards you two and prepared his wand in hand, he wasn’t thinking at all but there was something that registered from the whole ordeal before doing something stupid….you looked happy.

Genuinely happy, the type of happy you experienced when you’re far away from home doing whatever you wanted, the type of happy he liked to see you feel.

Severus made you happy, he made you laugh and smile, he was blushing clearly but entirely enchanted by you.

Lucius knows a love struck puppy when he sees one, but still why? Why did you hide this from him? Maybe Narcissa was right…

"Lucius!" You finally seemed to notice your brother standing a few feet away, severus snapped his neck to look back and stood up immediately.

"Lucius I—"

"How long?" Said lucius, his knuckles turning more red on his albino skin "how long have you been hiding this from me?!" His voice dangerously over the volume he uses in school.

Severus swallowed then looked down at you, you looked defeated.

"A few months….I wanted to tell you but I knew you wouldn’t approve of it! You never let anyone approach me and severus is the nicest guy I could end up with!" You screamed at him divested, he always did this, you love your brother but sometimes he couldn’t get it through his skull that you’re grown and able to make your own decisions.

Lucius glared at severus, a headache was threatening to happen, he took a deep breath and collected himself before speaking again.

"Yes I would disapprove of this but not for the reasons you think, I would disapprove of this because I had no knowledge of it beforehand and because I know this is a dangerous step you’ve taken, I trust severus is a decent guy but that doesn’t mean you can go around sneaking with him behind my back."

His words hurt, they hurt like knives through your chest and you hated him for it, you hated how he was still right, how if your father knew you’ll be domed or disowned, you hated how he was still looking out for you.

"I choice this and I don’t want to step back brother" the simple statement left your lips and you stood up.

"I did too, I have no alternative motive lucius, I just…you know I would never hurt her intentionally!"

The worst part of all of this is that lucius believed him, that boy was telling the truth, he might do mistakes but he cares for those who show him love, which is exactly what you’re doing.

Damn it, this was a losing game and apparently you’re choosing to go through with it.

"Fine. Both of you are responsible for what happens if somebody finds but remember my words severus, I will kill you in an instant if my sister go hurt because of you, am I understood?"

Severus nodded "Crystal clear."

You sighed "thank you lucius"

[crimeronan]

Thinking about "Amity and Hunter being deranged and causing immense bodily harm to one another" Just how aware is Luz of the extent of the harm because they're obviously both keeping it from her for obvious reasons.

I can see Hunter straight up being "Well I can't let Luz know Amity did this because if she were to get mad at Amity or concerned for my safety and worried she might do it again... and that would seriously bum her out given the whole 'weirdly massive crush she can't articulate' thing going on." (and also general 'Can't let Luz worry about my injuries/nearly dying' based thoughts )

Amity is just convinced that if Luz knew about 'the time she sent half of Hunter's ribcage into his lungs she would be out of the castle or worse and knows that people posing a threat to Hunter's life have a habit of peacefully having heart attacks in their sleep. And in truth if she were anyone else that might not be a silly fear.

(I love the genuinely terrified with good reason of, to seeing you're safe with them to lover pipeline)

For a while she doesn't get that she isn't 'anyone else' and that a) Hunter genuinely likes her company, and b) Luz both likes her and respects Hunter's autonomy to not throw out his murder bestie even if she didn't... (even if she'd prefer he not be nearly dying all the time)

So for a while she is convinced Hunter is holding onto it as perfect blackmail material for whenever. I do think it's funny if they just... never tell her just how brutal their fights could be, or only tell her when they're all in their fourties or smthn

luz ABSOLUTELY does not know about the Matchstick Bones incident. and neither hunter nor amity are willing to tell her. i do like the idea of amity worrying about blackmail.... but i'm ALSO really fond of the thought that, like. the possibility of luz-related blackmail evaporates Really Fucking Fast. because hunter is so aggressively and edgily insistent that amity not mention this to luz.

so like. it seems like HE might be in trouble with her if he tells. mutually assured destruction!

amity Does have a vested interest in lilith not finding out, though. darius is not a snitch so no worries there, but hunter is a bitch. ultimately i don't think he Actually would tell her, because he doesn't actually expect lilith to give a fuck. but amity clearly believes lilith would give a fuck. hunter can use this

^worst boy In The World.

as for amity fearing luz finding out... i don't think she'd be Super afraid of luz exiling her or killing her for it. unless it's maybe in those first very fraught days after belos dies. she'd be way more scared if hunter had ended up with permanent injuries, but he's fine, so no harm no foul, right??

she IS worried luz will think less of her. and worried luz won't trust her / will think she's dangerous.

the thing about hunter and amity's fights -- both the physical and verbal ones -- are that they're mutually, equally vicious. both of them are really Going For It. amity accidentally hurt hunter but he could Just As Easily have snapped her spine or cracked her skull by accident.

it's less "luz is gonna think i'm torturing hunter" and more "luz is gonna think we're irresponsible and stupid." which. THEY ARE.

meanwhile on hunter's end, as usual he doesn't want to stress luz out. and more importantly, he doesn't want her to tell him to stop, and she Absolutely Fucking Would if she knew how dangerous things were getting. luz being like "can't you guys spar with some ground rules and cushions????" and hunter like "actually we're both so filled with formless aimless rage that if we don't do this we're probably gonna go on some kind of serial killing spree instead. i don't expect you to understand tho 💕" and luz like "You Are Right. I Do Not."

anyway. they've pulled the worst of their punches since darius yelled at them, at least. if luz ever finds out it'll 100% be when they're in their forties and amity or hunter references it as a fond adolescent memory, forgetting luz was out of the loop.

and luz is like. h. Hello. Excuse Me??

[top-faye]

I kind of don't want to compare Wan to Ek cause Wan's love for Pleng is actual love vs. Ek's "love" for Wan being just pure possessive obsession. He doesn't care for Wan in the same way that Wan does for Pleng, but I do feel like both of them have similar levels of obsessive love for their targets of affection and I think in a lot of ways the novel kind of has Ek serve as a foil to Wan.

More spoilery novel thoughts below the cut.

When Ek threatened Wan and Pleng with a gun, Wan was extremely nonchalant about the whole thing ... like disturbingly chill in how she stood against him and did not seem afraid of the gun at all. And that was because that Wan argued that she knew without a doubt that because Ek loved her, that he'd never hurt her like that.

Ek's "love" for Wan is monstrously evil and possessive—he married Wan despite knowing that she didn't love him and he raped her when she wouldn't have sex with him—but Wan seems to understand him and his feelings well enough to know that he wouldn't actually kill her. And that instead, he would try to kill himself to hurt her and her relationship in another way.

That's utterly deranged thinking, but it's thinking that Wan understood immediately, which was why she reacted quickly and was able to change the trajectory of the bullet when she intervened.

I really hate to say it, but Wan and Ek are actually extremely similar in a lot of ways. As fucking deranged it is to marry a man in the hopes of seeing your true love who you haven't seen in over ten years at the wedding ... it is also fucking deranged to marry a woman you supposedly love when you know her sole reason for marrying you is so that she can see the person she really loves. I wonder if part of the reason that Wan remained by Ek's side for so long wasn't only because Pleng had picked him, but because a part of her felt a little bit understood by him.

He does constantly dismiss Wan and Pleng's feelings towards each other and their relationship with one another, of course. He is still, after all, a homophobic violent misogynist who views the lesbian relationship between the two as "non-threatening" up until the end of the novel when he realizes that Wan was genuinely incapable of ever loving him.

But he was also probably the only person in Wan's life who could even begin to understand the pain that Wan was going through. In the special chapters, Wan mentions that he offered her comfort and hope about the idea of Pleng returning. He dismisses the relationship because they're both women, but simultaneously, he understands the depth and intensity of it.

And I think Wan was partly able to tolerate his feelings towards her for so long, because she felt understood by him in a sense and because she might have felt she understood him.

She loved Pleng enough to want to remain only a friend for the rest of their lives. She only became emboldened in her feelings and flirting when she realized that Pleng felt the same way towards her. I think maybe, initially, she thought that Ek's feelings towards her were the same. That he loved her enough to be satisfied with a friendship. That he loved her enough to want to care and protect her, but of course that wasn't the case.

Because the similarities between Ek and Wan are fairly surface level when it comes down to it, because while both are obsessive, possessive, and ultimately toxic, Ek cares more about having Wan than he does about Wan's safety and well-being.

Ek tried to kill himself in order to hurt Wan. Which directly contrasts against Pleng and Wan. In the novel, Pleng mentions contemplating suicide in the past but she doesn't act on it for fear that Wan would learn of it and it would hurt her, lead to her own death. And at the end of the novel when it seems like Wan is on the verge of killing herself—as implied in a note that she left for Pleng to spitefully hurt her (Wan's love is more "pure" than Ek's, but both still have malicious streaks)—but while she considers it, she ultimately decides to not kill herself because she wouldn't want to hurt Pleng like that.

Ek's love for Wan foils Wan's love for Pleng in this sense, because it demonstrates that while Wan is selfish, obsessive, possessive, and deranged that she is still a caring and loving partner and that ultimately her love for Pleng is fueled by a genuine love for all of Pleng whereas Ek only loved Wan as a possession to be owned and only loved the parts of her that were palpable to him.

[silversodas]

The Tornado vs The Glass Cannon

Rocky and Mordecai’s interactions in the side comics have painted them as pretty interesting foils for each other

Mordecai surprised me in this comic, I expected him to write off Rocky like everyone else does whenever he says or does something weird. But Mordecai just questions his actions and engages in an honest not to bad conversation with Rocky. (They seem like the type of people that have conversations that take 20 different directions and no one can follow) They have the potential for a pretty interesting dynamic and I am interested to see if they get one in the animated series especially with how the pilot turned out. And yes, they didn’t interact in the pilot, but Rocky was the only one to surprise and get the drop on Mordecai, also I need to talk about Mordecai’s questionable quick draw skills. Let’s start closer to the beginning

People have already noticed that Mordecai was shocked and recognized Ivy

But he also makes an effort as discreetly as he can to divert the twin’s attention away from Ivy and the others

“Can we not prolong this? We have more pressing matters to attend to”

His eyes dart away from them while saying this, showing he is not being genuine. I am on board with the observation that he left to try and find out who killed Atlas, and at this point I think he was of the mind set that he didn’t want to hurt Ivy but would if he had to. He spectates until Serafine warns him they might be thinking he doesn’t want to kill them and this is my first “do you just not shoot fast?” Moment comes up

When trying to shoot Rocky, he takes so much time that Rocky notices him and gets Ivy to make a hard left, but maybe the audience is just viewing it slower then it’s actually happening? Because when Rocky is able to dodge the bullet it hitting the radiator instead gives Mordecai pause

He slowly lowers his gun and raises an eyebrow, almost like he is thinking “huh, that wasn’t supposed to happen” like he was surprised he was able to dodge the bullet

The second time with Calvin is really weird because he gave Calvin enough time to stop being dizzy, look around, and then notice that a gun was in his face

Like are you planning to shoot him sometime this year Mordy? You could have head shot him three freaking times in the time he was trying to get up. Are you giving them opportunities to get away?

This is also when our Tornado Rocky gets the drop on our Glass Cannon

This is the first time his facade drops and is truly shocked, even looks around dumbly. A glass cannon is pretty much what it sounds like, something or someone vary dangerous or powerful but also vary fragile. Mordecai has delicate senses being incredibly OCD, he can improvise but only within the perimeters of how he thinks everyone works

And Rocky was a literal tornado in the pilot

Mordecai is no longer relaxed and indifferent, he is alert and wondering WTF is happening. He attempts to get closer to shoot Rocky just like Serafine and Nico are, but none of them can get close or land a shot

Rocky’s part in this fight feels like he is symbolically acting as a tornado, large, destructive, and Serafine nearly gets killed trying shoot him. I am interested to see how that ability gets used in the future, because not only does he make a grate distraction, he is a distraction you can’t touch.

And then there is where he spared Ivy, which is the most interesting. I do think Victor is part of the reason he didn’t want to hurt Ivy, this is his third, taking his sweet time to shoot shot. But this one feels more like an exchange and leads me to believe that he has his own dynamic with her

Ivy notices Mordecai point a gun at her, but says nothing and doesn’t even alert Rocky or Calvin

She has time to duck, to warn the boys, but doesn’t, she could be frozen in fear, but I doubt it. Actually she doesn’t even look that afraid, almost like she is staring him down. As if she knows she doesn’t have to duck because she knows he won’t shoot her, she doesn’t even drive any faster. She is proven right in the end

He doesn’t even seem insulted at her sureness that he wont shoot her, if anything the sigh he lets out is more like a “you could at least act like I would shoot you” it seemed like he thought he was willing to hurt Ivy if he had to, but isn’t really surprised to learn he was wrong

But this is just how I read all of this, I can’t be sure if he was shooting slow intentionally or if I am just missing something

[leahnardo-da-veggie]

Merida

Merida placed the joss stick in its holder, as she did every day. The faint scent of incense invaded her nostrils, and she sneezed. This made the girl in front of her let out a little giggle. The pair sat there, contemplating the faintly burning joss stick.

"Thank you for putting that there. My parents never honored my choice of religion while I was alive. I'm glad someone does now," the ghost girl said, after a while. It was strange hearing such solemn words from what seemed to be a nine year old, but Merida was used to strange things. Ghosts always appeared as children, whether they died of old age or were stillborn. "I will not forget your kindness, Cazarsa. I owe you a boon. Should you ever be in need of help, simply call me."

Cazarsa. It always warmed her heart to hear the phrase. In the language of the dead, it vaguely meant 'ally', but with an air of gratitude and friendship. Ghosts did not use the phrase lightly. "It was my pleasure to help you. I hope the starlight shines on you as you dance beneath the full moon," Merida said politely.

"And I hope the sun warms your soul and Kurall favors you in all that you do," the ghost responded automatically, before bowing. Then Merida picked up her bag and headed off to school, leaving the graveyard as the grey morning light stole away the darkness of night. It was the time of the living, and the ghosts would soon be away, lest the exorcists catch them.

Merida Ryder spent her dawns and twilights helping the ghosts. Ofttimes, all they needed was something as small as a vase of flowers or a copy of the new reboot of their favorite show. They had come to accept her as a middleman, someone to guard them from the cold cruelties of the exorcists. She warned them of the approach of any exorcists, and they did not hunt the living. It created a peace most attributed to the nearly savage zeal with which the exorcists hunted ghosts.

Merida slipped between two cars, strolling up along the street that led to her secondary school. A few ghosts resided there, along with a spirit. They were the most frequent recipients of her gifts and assistance, for she needed their favors the most. The moment she walked through the school gates, she felt a presence at her side. 

Without looking at him, she said, "What's up, Hans?" Hans was the spirit, a strange creature that never showed his face. He and he alone traded in artifacts, requesting her to go through esoteric channels to find the most incomprehensible magical objects in existence. On the other hand, his favors were far more practical than most, especially for chasing off exorcists. Most exorcists had no interest in getting into a fight with a genuine spirit, since they were unable to bully them around. It meant the difference between a painful second death and afterlife for many ghosts, so Merida tried to keep a few of his favors on hand at all times.

Nevertheless, she never truly trusted the spirit, though she rather liked him. He was far too powerful to be lurking in the middle of nowhere twiddling his thumbs. "The exorcist has brought her weapons to school again. It seems she plans on killing someone today. You might want to warn the ghosts," Hans remarked blandly. 

"Thank you for the information." She had to get back into her school persona, she reminded herself sternly. It would not do for her sister to discover that she was the one feeding information about the exorcists to the ghosts, and speaking with the formality of the dead would give her away instantly. "Don't talk to me until after school. I don't wanna get caught by her."

As the presence left her side, Merida turned around. "Actually, could you warn them for me? I'm afraid I can't make my usual rounds. I forgot my homework at school yesterday." She felt him nod assent, then disappear.

The school was old, and with age came death. The ghost-mice scurried along the corridors, unbeknownst to the vast majority of the students, and Merida dropped crumbs for them as she went, crumbling the cookies for her lunch. "Go home, little ones. It's dangerous out here. The school exorcist is making her rounds," Merida murmured. The mice took the hint, disappearing into the walls and the pipes. Hopefully they would carry the message to all the other ghosts.

Keeping her eyes on the slate floor tiles, Merida hunched her shoulders and tried to blend into the crowd of youths who gabbled amongst each other and spilled drinks and had a deep-seated prejudice against the dead, never considering that they too would become ghosts one day. Grey locker doors swung open and closed, and Merida avoided them as she made her way to the hall. 

She settled down in a corner, trying to blend in with the faded white paint of the walls, praying that the exorcist would not find her. But she had neither the skill nor the luck of the ghosts, as Miranda Ryder, youngest exorcist in the 42nd Corps, approached her.

"I need you to be on your best behavior. I'm doing a presentation on exorcism today, and the press is coming to see it. I don't want you screwing it up again. Got it?" Merida shied away, glueing her eyes to the floor. 

"Look at me, damn it! Merida, this is important. There are more bigwigs coming here than I can shake a stick at. Even the head of my corps is coming here. This could mean a promotion!" Miranda all but shouted at her, and she curled up even tighter into a ball, closing her eyes tightly. The head of the corps? There were going to be far too many exorcists at the school for the number of ghosts Merida was trying to hide. It was dangerous, far too dangerous, and Merida felt her heart sink.

No matter what she did today, someone was going to die.

A sob caught her throat at the thought. "Stop that. You're not a little kid anymore. You don't get to throw tantrums every time you don't get your way," Miranda told her angrily, before striding off. Merida stopped her, terrified of what was to come.

"I want to help you. I'm sick of being in the background. Just let me be your assistant, just for a day?" If she could find out more, she might be able to minimize the loss of life. She might be able to avoid the piles of corpses, the dead who died again leaking ectoplasm. It had taken her weeks before she could get rid of the phantom sensation of sticky ectoplasm, and months to stop bursting into tears at the mere sight of the school last time.

Miranda raised a skeptical eyebrow. "You'd better not. In any case, I need to show that you're not the same batshit crazy bitch who threw a tantrum when we got rid of those pests at the school," she told Merida. "You really embarrassed me last time. Maybe this will make up for your idiocy."

Merida blinked back tears at the word 'pests', and kept her mouth shut. Monsters, she thought. How could anyone call a sentient being a pest? Even if they are dead, what does it matter? They still have feelings. Her fingers clenched the greying hand-me-down school skirt she wore. The blood flowing through her burned her flesh, bitter with anger.

But she could not hate the exorcists. She understood how dangerous the ghosts were. Part of her life, and Miranda's, involved stopping the ghosts from ripping open the guts of the living and feasting on them.

They both brought safety to the living, in polar ways. One with death, the other by preserving life. Of course, in the classic style of humanity, bloodshed was favored over the quiet negotiation and peace.

They walked up onto stage, and Miranda handed her a sheet of paper. "These are your lines. Don't fuck them up, got it?" Merida nodded dumbly. 

In front of them, the school's populace settled into their morning positions, a sea of white shirts and black pants. Merida pulled her eyes away from them to look at the script. It consisted of a few lines, mostly prompting segments of Miranda's speech. 

As she read further, she realized that Miranda planned on showing the school an actual demonstration of an exorcism, on an actual ghost. That pig-faced bitch! She's going to murder someone in front of us all?! And they will all applaud and cheer at the extermination of a monster… Merida had to do something. But what? 

The exorcist jostled her elbow, and Merida realized that they were starting. 

"Good morning everyone! I'm certain you all recognize me. I'm Miranda Ryder," Miranda said, before nudging her again.

Her line, according to the script, was 'and I'm (insert name)!' In a fit of pique, Merida said, "And I'm insert name!" 

A scattering of snickers gave Merida the courage to continue, taking over Miranda's lines. "On this fine, ever so sunny day, we are going to talk about the murder and torture of the dead! Or as you all call it, exorcism!" The lines were not strictly in the script, but Merida felt it summed up the content perfectly.

"And since I know you all know what exorcism is about, given how much they shove it down our throats, let's just skip to the fun bit, shall we?! We're going to do an elaborate ritual to kill an innocent ghost! I wonder who it is… Maybe one of your ancestors, or the soul of a beloved friend?" Miranda tried to cut in, livid at her for turning her speech into a train wreck, but Merida was on a roll. 

"While our beloved exorcist fetches the victim, I'll tell you the truth about ghosts, shall I? You know those stories about the dark times where ghosts stole away unsuspecting children, eating them alive?" Merida waited for them to nod, and they did. 

"Well, it was true. Ghosts do drink human blood. They do it to further their after-lives. They choose children because they look like children, and because children are easily manipulated. They get the child to trust them, then they take the child off to a dark corner and they drink their blood!" Miranda had stopped protesting, and was listening curiously.

"I was the victim of this when I was five. I made an imaginary friend, and followed him to the forest one day. If my sister had not saved me, I would have been devoured by a hungry ghost. Even as it is, I still have the scar," Merida said as she pulled up her shirt, exposing her midriff. It was covered in jagged scars, as though a chainsaw had scraped across her chest. A collective gasp resounded through the hall, as people gaped at the horrific evil of the ghosts.

"Guess you aren't gonna fuck this up again," Miranda muttered. "I'll bring the ghost out. I'm glad you've finally stopped being a fuckwit."

Merida ignored her. "These ghosts have done things to rival the cruelties of the most infamous serial killers. Worse, they exploit the very thing that makes children children; their innocence. These creatures are child predators! Wouldn't you agree?" 

There were wholehearted cheers from the teachers, many of whom had kids of their own. "Exterminate the ghosts!" Someone in the back cried.

"They're just like the human scum we give death sentences to, right?!" The response was deafening, and Merida was filled with horror at their support for mass genocide. These people… Do they not realize they are killing humans? Have they not made the connection? Simply because they are dead does not change the fact that they were human once! 

"That's because they are," Merida said. The half a thousand people in the room hushed, confused by the sudden turn. "These ghosts you hate so much are the very same serial killers that society reviles. Stop to consider. Ghosts are just the souls of the dead. Serial killers and rapists and general human scum have souls too, yes?" 

The people nodded uncertainly. Behind her, Miranda had stopped to listen, and Merida gestured for her to get a move on. She did, and Merida continued.

"And therein lies the problem. These disturbing crimes against humanity are being committed by a tiny portion of ghosts. Most ghosts, just like their living counterparts, simply want to live their after-lives in peace. An exorcist's job is to eradicate these evil ghosts."

She let them simmer in that, as Miranda wheeled a massive cage, made of cold iron, with a long velvet curtain draped over it. Its bars were wide and flat, covered in an enchantment meant to contain ghosts. Merida nearly gagged at the terrifying aura of the cage. It was slimy, like ectoplasm, and putrid, magical rot embedded into metal. It was a cage meant for cruelties, made to corrupt and corrode.

"Please, let me out," someone said from within. Merida recognized that voice immediately. It was the girl she had visited in the morning. 

As one, the audience gasped in excitement. Ghosts were normally only perceptible to children and those with magical talent. Merida placed her hands on the velvet cloth. "I'll get you out, miss. Just play along for now, okay?" The girl reached out to the small gap between the bars and touched Merida's hand. Her fingers were cold, even through the thick layer of velvet.

"I trust you, Cazarsa," the girl whispered. Internally, Merida cursed herself for forgetting to warn the ghosts beyond the school. They were in as much danger as the rest.

"Well, shall we?" Miranda gave her a tight-lipped smile, rightfully suspicious of her whispered communication with the ghost. Merida nodded.

Together, they dragged the curtain off the cage, revealing the ghost. She was an absolute mess, with ichor running down her cheeks, tears of the dead, and wide, terrified gray eyes. She floated in the center of the cage, curled into a foetal position in an attempt to get as far from the cage as possible. Merida felt horribly uncomfortable being in the vicinity of the cage. She could not imagine how infinitely worse the girl felt.

"Look at this horrible criminal! This peddler of evil, participant in the most vile of sins! Dearest sister, will you please tell us all what crimes this inhuman filth has committed?" Merida placed as much emphasis on the 'crime' the girl had committed as possible. If they saw she was innocent, Merida might be able to convince the exorcists to let the ghosts be, if only for a while. 

Maybe there was a chance to stop the bloodshed.

Miranda instantly saw the minefield she had set up. Her eyes hardened, lips flattening into a line. She said nothing.

"I will tell you what I did to deserve this," the ghost girl said, uncurling herself. Her tattered clothes were stained with ichor and ectoplasm, and her eyes were red from crying, but she still managed a semblance of dignity. 

"What are you doing?! Get down!" Merida hissed urgently at her. She was going to ruin the entire thing!

"No, Cazarsa. I must speak. My horrible crime, as you put it, was being young and stupid. I was a drug addict, a New Age fool who thought getting high was the key to enlightenment. I had a teenage rebellion, went for the religion that seemed most likely to piss off my parents, and joined a community of equally foolish youth. Some of the adults in this room might remember doing the same."

"The only difference is, I did not survive. It was two days from my coming of age, when I got run over. I was in the middle of the road, higher than the top of a skyscraper, when I got hit by a man rushing his pregnant wife to hospital. I did not come back to haunt them. I do not hold a grudge against them."

"Yes, I did drugs. Yes, I did stupid things. But I paid for them in blood and the tears of my loved ones. I came back for them, to say sorry, to tell them that I had been stupid. I do not care that they did not respect my religion, or even acknowledge my presence at the funeral. But I forgive them."

"I am not a ghost of revenge, or of evil. I am a ghost of regret, one made to sit and contemplate my own foolishness for the rest of eternity, to find peace and lead others to it. That is my crime, if you so wish to prosecute me for it," The girl spoke eloquently, projecting her voice throughout the room. There was no way anyone could not have heard it, and Merida thanked Ina for her mercy. 

The room had fallen completely silent, all eyes and ears on the ghost girl. The cameras of the journalists were pointed right at them, and Merida knew she had scored a point for ghostkind. 

Finally, someone said, "That's not a crime at all!" 

"Yeah! She's a good person!"

"Let go of her!"

Echoes of the sentiment reverberated around the room. Merida turned to the girl and raised an eyebrow.

"I used to win prizes for my public speaking and impromptu speeches," she admitted sheepishly. 

"Thank Ina for that," Merida whispered, then corrected herself. "Kurall, I mean." 

Miranda surveyed the hall with a poker face. "You knew this was going to happen," she said accusingly.

"I did not. All I know is that I cannot let the exorcists to continue harming innocents, whether they are alive or dead," Merida replied.

"This time you've gone too far. You're a traitor to your own kind, and I'm going to stop you," Miranda snarled, pulling a gun out of her jacket.

Everything happened in a blur. Merida instinctively ducked as the gun fired, diving towards the floor, but she was not fast enough. Sharp, bloody pain filled her shoulder.

Merida looked up, confused and in agony. "You shot me! But… I'm your sister!" 

Miranda stared down at her with dead eyes. "Not anymore," she said dispassionately. She lowered the gun slightly, aiming it at Merida's head. 

This is the end, Merida thought. I knew someone was going to die. I just never expected it to be me. But I cannot give up. I must not. Nobody will protect the ghosts otherwise. I can't try to be peaceful anymore. Not unless I want them to keep massacring the innocent.

Someone's going to die today, and it's going to have to be my sister. The thought, horrible and wrong as it was, gave her the will to move. 

Merida was not a trained fighter, or a magician. She had never seen the point in learning magic, unless it was to help or to heal. But she did learn to enhance her speed and endurance. She was long and lanky, and being able to run from the graveyard to the school in five minutes seemed like an excellent idea. She was glad she learnt to do so, because it was the only thing that could save her.

She slammed into Miranda, tackling her legs even as her shoulder screamed in agony. The gun went off as Miranda went down, and a second source of pain shot up her leg, and she clung on to her consciousness. She had to finish it. The world seemed to become smaller, encompassing only the two sisters and their struggle. 

Miranda slapped her, sharp nails raking across her face as Merida slapped the gun out of her other hand. They fought bitterly, like all siblings did. The only difference was that it was life and death, rather than a squabble over the last slice of cake. The gun skidded out of range, leaving the two of them to fight it out with their fists and teeth.

Merida thrashed like a fish in a net, ignoring the throbbing wounds that tried to claim her attention. I have to finish this, she told herself. I must finish this. She tried to drag herself to the gun with her uninjured arm, clawing desperately. Just before she could reach it, the gun floated out of her range.

"Hello there, Merida," Hans said with his typical cheer. "Need some help?"

Merida gritted her teeth. She did not know if she was glad to see him, irritated, or too pained too care. She suspected it was the latter. "Pass me the damn gun. And hurry up about it!" 

Behind her, Miranda was stumbling to her feet, clutching a broken wrist. She looked like a reanimated corpse from a zombie movie, complete with gratituous gore. Unfortunately, most of it was Merida's. 

"Are you sure? I mean… She is your sister," he said skeptically. All the same, he tossed the gun to her.

Merida's mind flashed back to what Miranda had told her. _Not anymore, huh?_ She raised the gun, cocked it.

Miranda had just enough time for her mind to register that she was about to get shot. She raised her hands, a futile gesture. The bullet went straight past them, penetrating the spot between her eyes. 

The world seemed to slow. Blood blossomed out of the wound, the flower of Death opening for the briefest of moments. Miranda's eyes were wide with horror, caught in that moment for eternity. Her mouth was open slightly. She looked the very picture of shock.

Merida wanted to feel sorry for her, like she had for the dead ghosts, but she could not. All she could think about was how the exorcist got what she deserved. Or, as Ina had put it, karma had come to bite her in the ass. _Those ghosts had the same expression when they died too. That or relief that their torment was finally over. _

Then time resumed on its normal course, and Miranda fell backwards, dead as the ghosts she had failed to kill. Maybe she would become one. That would be truly ironic. 

Merida turned back to Hans. "I guess you only owe me two favors now," she said calmly.

"I guess so," he replied, sounding unnerved. It took a lot to disturb a spirit. They were notorious for having no empathy. If Merida had been in any proper state of mind, she would have been horrified. But she was not. So she did not care.

She stumbled to her feet, numbly ignoring the pain that racked her leg as she put her weight on it, and hobbled over to the cage. The girl was still floating in the middle of it.

She fiddled with the latch, which needed no key, and released her. Merida's vision was slowly going black from the blood loss. And the trauma of watching her own sister die (albeit indirectly) at her hands, though she would never admit it.

The last thing she remembered doing was kneeling over her not-sister dumbly.

[snailstriad]

Connections Between Novel and Current Milgram

Alright, it's theory time. While it's not confirmed yet, after Kotoko's music video, I am certainly sure that the two novels and our current Milgram are connected. Because their motives fit so well? Maybe some of you know about our "snails theory," right? If not or if you've forgotten about it, please take a look at it too! [in our twitter under the same name] (I must say that some parts of the theory (e.g the voices part) are wrong, but it is a theory after all.) To summarize, we think Haruka, Muu, Shidou, Amane, and Mikoto's beliefs and mindsets come from the first novel, and Yuno, Fuuta, Mahiru, Kazui, and Kotoko's mindsets and their thoughts resemble the second novel. First of all, please do not forget that we are not connecting crimes. Maybe you can see similarities but I, too, believe crimes and storyline different(not completely because of Touchi) from our current trials. This theory is only about mindsets. Well, let's start with 1st novel characters.

Our first prisoner, Gentle. He is a very emotional man to me. And killing a man, who is about to kill a woman. Of course this is pure coincidence but the thought of killing one life to save the others is bugging me. Because of this, I feel like there is a parallel between Gentle and Shidou.

Nervous. Her anxiety of being useless and a failure is similar to Muu actually. Another point that these two have in common is wanting to be appreciated. This desire for acknowledgment adds a psychological layer, suggesting how much external validation influences their thoughts and actions.

Considering that Close and Gentle are siblings, you might think I've lost my mind for what I'm about to say next, but yes, I believe Close and Amane have similar thought patterns. Let's look at the events this way: Close is someone who would do anything and everything to get the person she loves. However, after all the events, she no longer fears suffering. In fact, she wanted to experience pain and didn't seek help. This reminds me a lot of Amane. Maybe in the future, I'll prepare a separate theory for Amane, but I always felt that in that famous electric shock scene, Amane was afraid of pain, so it seemed like she was trying to comply with the rules. However, after her father's death, and of course, when she came to Milgram, she tried not to fear pain and even attempted to surpass the help she received.

The next prisoner, in my opinion, is probably the easiest to connect among all the characters: Two-Face. Initially, I had wondered besides the name, what similarities there could be with Mikoto, but then I realized I had overlooked the most important thing. Both of them were unaware of the consequences of their actions. As you know, Mikoto was completely oblivious to everything. On the other hand, Two-Face genuinely didn't know that what he was attempting could lead to an actual murder.

Our last character from the first novel is Torch. Firstly, when we saw less of Torch's story and mindset compared to the second novel, I couldn't liken him to anyone. However, later, with the release of the second novel, I understood that the reason Torch's (or Touchi's) life was saved was Milgram. Through Milgram, he found the love he had been seeking for a long time, thanks to Sumi. When I look at this child who has no one in his life, I see Haruka. Both are individuals without anyone and in need of love. Additionally, Milgram, who saved Touchi, also saved the first trial Haruka. The lack of self-confidence he had when he first arrived was overcome thanks to Milgram.

Our first prisoner in the second novel: Tatsumi. I might exceed my thread limit before finishing listing the commonalities with Fuuta. First, let's talk about how both perceive their crimes as a symbol of justice. For those who haven't read it, I'll give a brief overview of the common theme in the second novel: all the characters' crimes are based on a kind of murder trend called "justifiable righteous murder." When Touchi asks him what justice means, Tatsumi responds, "Justice is a social media hashtag." Most likely, you've already understood where I'm going with this: both share similar thoughts about the concept of justice. Another shared aspect is that both constantly question the concept of justice they possess.

Rina and Mei, since they share the same trial, I'll continue without separating them. In my previous theory, I talked about how Yuno and Mahiru are opposites of each other, yet still closely connected. The same holds true for Rina and Mei; they are almost opposites, but their attitudes towards all these events are still the same. It's similar to Yuno and Mahiru; Yuno has a very cold personality while Mahiru is the opposite. However, when it comes to Milgram and its rules, both pairs' thoughts align remarkably.

Alright, this was the person I found the most challenging to connect among all the prisoners: Tomonari. Because, honestly, when I first looked at him, nothing came to mind except the word "psychopath." However, if you look at Tomonari's actions, despite all the darkness within, he never tried to kill anyone until the very end, somewhat keeping his "true personality" hidden. You might get upset with me, I know, but I associate him with Kazui. As I mentioned, this theory is not about the crimes they committed. Kazui, too, chose to lie and conceal his true self until the very end of his life. In my view, they are similar because of these choices they made.

Finally, the last prisoner, Mako. First, I can't go without mentioning that, in Kotoko's MV, I saw Kotoko closely following the "Justifiable Righteous Murder" trend created by Mako (even looking at the news of Tatsumi's murder). Both of the characters are individuals willing to kill for the goals they have set in their minds. Additionally, both characters closely follow the workings of Milgram and manipulate it in line with their own interests.

[syrups-fanfic-cafe]

Good Morning,

I would like to order to order some headcannons of the main Hazbin casts (Charlie, Angel, Vaggie, Husk) with an S/O whose known through hell as a no nonsense tough-as-nails powerhouse (think Nico Bellic from gta IV) but one day they find an abandoned little imp girl and adopt them as their own. The girl has obviously been through a lot, and in time they slowly develop a good relationship, with the others find out about their caring, kind, fatherly side.

Good morning And of course! I hope you like the headcanons! - Mod Syrup

Charlie, Vaggie, Angel, and Husk finding out their stoic s/o has a fatherly side

Charlie Morningstar

She never knew you had a soft spot, you were one of the toughest people she knew, and you didn't like wasting your time with anything. So when you had come home with a little Imp girl in your arms, she had a lot of questions.

First of which being where you even found the child. She looked very young, and she assumed that maybe the little one just, wandered off, she knew that some parents in hell just weren't that attentive to their children. She even fears that her parents might've been killed, she was an Imp, after all, Imp's weren't exactly treated the best down here...

You reassured her thought you had found the young child wandering the streets alone. You had asked where her parents were, but she refused to talk about it. You would've pushed her for more information, but... you could tell it really bothered her, so you had just caved and decided to adopt her.

Charlie was a bit wary about you, keeping a close eye on you two. She was so afraid that you might act harshly against the Imp girl if she did something wrong. But so far, you seemed to be a decent parent, a little rough, but she could tell you genuinely liked spending time with the child.

Then, that faithful day came, your new daughter had been playing to recklessly and accidentally broke a vase in the house, some that both she and Charlie assumed you'd get mad over... except, you didn't.

You didn't even yell at her when you saw her standing over the broken vase, crying as she tried to carefully clean up the pieces without hurting herself. Carefully, you kneeled down and shooed her hands away from the sharp glass, carefully looking at them for a moment to make sure she wasn't hurt...

Charlie watched the whole ordeal from the end up the hall, watching as you comforted your new daughter, before helping her pick up the glass and clean up any cuts she might've gotten. It was the sweetest thing she had ever seen out of you. She had only ever known you as the cold, no-nonsense demon who took no shit, someone who would've killed over something as simple as a mistake.

It was oddly nice, seeing this side of you for once.

Vaggie

"WHY THE HELL DO YOU HAVE A CHILD WITH YOU?!" "Found it" "WHERE?!" "Outside"

Needless to say, Vaggie has just as many questions as Charlie, if not more. Where did you find this kid? Where were her parents? What happened to her parents? How did you manage to just, stumble across a completely unsupervised imp child within the city?

You seemed to just role your eyes at her panic and questions. What the hell were you supposed to do? Just leave the child there, that'd just be irresponsible. Just cause you were tough as nails doesn't mean you didn't know what responsibility was.

Eventually, Vaggie gave up on asking questions, and just started doing research, wanting to at least help with raising the child. But you were insistent that you knew what you were doing. And to her surprise, you actually did.

Most would actually consider you a near-perfect parent. Which is a surprise, most people would've seen an abandoned imp child and not even give the thing a chance. You on the other hand are trying your hardest to make sure this kid grows up well. Vaggie was awfully proud of you.

That is until you came home looking like you had just gotten into a fight. Which you actually had gotten into a fight! Why? Well, it's simple, someone made one single derogatory comment about your daughter, and you fucking lost it.

When she asked why you acted so drastically you simply stated that you had to make sure your kid knew how wrong those people were about her. Besides, it's not like anybody really gives a shit anyways.

Vaggie wasn't sure if she was a bit scared, or more proud of you than before. Either way, you and your daughter seemed happy, so she decided to be your impulse control at most.

Angel Dust

Angel didn't even question where you had got the kid. Don't get me wrong, he definitely wanted to know where you found a random, abandoned imp girl, but at the same time, this was hell, it probably wasn't that hard to find children just wandering the streets.

He did ask if you were gonna help find the girls parents or if you had actually adopted her. Upon telling him that you were adopting the child, he was a mix between excited and confused. You were the toughest person in hell, Angel had to literally work his ass off to rope you into a relationship, so the fact that you saw an abandoned child on the street and decided to adopt her without question... it made Angel a little jealous.

Angel was more than happy helping you take care of the kid. Yeah he wasn't the best at it, but he was fun, and in his eyes, that was all that counted. In fact, he might've grown even more attached to the little girl than you did.

He knew how much you cared about the little girl and wanted to make her happy. But he never expected a day in his life that he'd walk in on the girl having a little tea party with you and Fat Nuggets. You had even let her put make up on you. You still had your stoic, tough-as-nails expression, which almost made the whole thing even cuter and maybe a little bit funny.

"Hello Angel, care to join us?" You didn't even have any emotion in your voice. It was like you were only doing this out of obligation. Though of course, Angel just had to join, he couldn't help it, he just thought it was so sweet that you were playing along with your new daughter's antics. Plus, Fat Nuggets looks so cute in a tiara.

Afterward, Angel helps you clean the makeup off your face and put your daughter to bed. You tell him that if he tells anyone it'll be over for you two. Of course, Angel tells literally everyone he can, how could he not? It was adorable, and he knows you won't just up and leave him.

Husk

Husk doesn't really care about most of the things you do he knows that if you're doing it, then you can probably handle it yourself. That's why he didn't exactly question or care about the fact that you now had an imp child with you.

He wasn't exactly fond of the child either, yeah he was technically the pseudo-father to the child, seeing as he was dating you and you had adopted the child, but he really didn't see himself as 'parent material'. Still, he did his best to at least put up with the child, especially when you had something important to do that would be too dangerous for her to be around.

He honestly didn't think you'd have that much of a connection with the child either, but you seemed to really care about her. He would've thought it was adorable if he wasn't such a downer.

One day you approached him with the little girl in your arms, and asked him to do a magic trick for her. He was a bit confused, but then you explained that you had told her about how he liked magic, and ever since then she's been begging you to let Husk show her a magic trick or two.

Husk acted as if this was a chore for him, but deep down he was a little bit excited. He loved cheesy magic tricks, and didn't get to do them often, so he was happy that the kid and him shared an interest.

He did a simple magic trick, just the coin behind the ear trick. Immediately after, the girl burst into laughter and clapped her hands. That's the moment when Husk actually started warming up to the kid. So he grabbed a deck of cards, and decided to do another simple magic trick, which she enjoyed just as much.

Husk glanced up at you for a moment, a for the first time since he's met you, he saw you smiling. The tough as nails, emotionless powerhouse, was smiling over the fact that their daughter and boyfriend were enjoying their time together. Of course, you immediately wiped the smile off your face when he noticed.

"What the hell you smiling about?" "I, wasn't smiling..." "Yeah, whatever you say big guy."

[lincolndjarin]

Best Kept Secret : What If...?

a series of alternate/unused bks story lines!!

contains spoilers for all of bks!!

alternate torture @ the end

i grappled with this a lot. i very strongly believe that the worst thing you can do with your characters in a high stakes situation is coddle them. if i've learned anything from dnd it's that you cannot be afraid to hurt you characters.

yet for the first time in my life i've become so attached that i just couldn't do it.

the tongue in a box scene was something that caused me a lot of turmoil. in the original cut it was elaine's tongue, but i talked to my friend catie about it and we agreed that cutting off a lesbians tongue is fucked up. then i considered actually cutting off din's tongue, i thought that that would make for something really interesting with the big reveal if he couldn't talk to her but it just seemed too brutal? i couldn't really wrap my head around it so i eventually just made it someone elses tongue.

my replacement for that was din's leg, that was something that sort of came on at the last second, i gave him the limp as foreshadowing and then said fuck it, lets take the whole thing.

dress maker

the scene in chapter 4 where din walks in on her in the bath was originally a much longer sequence where a modiste visited the castle and there was a lot of stuff around making new dresses for her and din was going to walk in while she was getting changed.

eventually i scrapped the entire concept and gave elaine the seamstress trait instead.

multiple parties & balls (masquerade)

i briefly mentioned this in the q&a but in the original bks outline there were a lot more parties and big scenes like that. i realized pretty quickly that balls and parties are a visual medium. the reason why i like those scenes so much in other things is because they're so visually appealing which is harder to do when writing. there was going to be a readers birthday ball, a few other parties or wedding for kodos siblings etc but it always felt like filler.

the masquerade was my dream sequence that just never really fir naturally fit with the story so i eventually had to let it go.

no breakup/rules storyline

there was no break up in the original bks story board. instead, everything after chapter 7 was gonna be based around breaking each and every rule.

each chapter following would have been dedicated to breaking a few of the rules up until the last one that would have been; no falling in love, stop when i say to stop, and no kissing would have all been one big climax chapter. it would have been very little women in the 'we have got to have it out jo' sort of sense where she begs him to stop talking but he just keeps confessing.

eventually i realized that a rule or two break every chapter wasn't very sustainable. it was a fun idea and it might work in a different setting but bks at its core is supposed to be an overly dramatic period piece and there just wasn't enough conflict with that so instead i went with the breakup.

alternative ending

i had a similar ending for quite some time and one day i was listening to music and thinking about bks and realized that she loved naboo. originally they fled after kodo was killed. they built a cabin somewhere far away etc. etc.

but the character seemed to make more sense as someone who would want to do right by the people she had grown to love within the kingdom so i decided to make it a sort of thing where she disassembled the monarchy.

(there was also an ending where she faked her own death, framed kodo, and he was ripped apart by the citizens of naboo)

and of course i briefly considered genuinely killing din and having her raise the baby on her own. but the idea made me so truly upset that i just couldnt do it.

hoth story line

not much to say here other that there was going to be a thing where she went back to hoth to visit her family accompanied by the mandalorian. another thing that was fun as a concept but ended up feeling like filler so i dropped it.

elaine plot twist

another case of me really loving elaine and being conflicted about her character.

originally elaine was going to tell kodo about their relationship. it was going to be a situation where kodo suspected something and threatened lysa forcing elaine to take action but eventually i decided to use my backup which was leo since there had been foreshadowing for that anyway

neutral kodo

for quite a while i planned for kodo to be just a bad husband and not a villain. but i needed more conflict and i needed a driving force and he was easy to mold into that.

there was an alternate storyline where he fell in love with the reader and “killed” din out of jealousy

[belit0]

NUMMBER 7 & 8 WITH MADARA I AM BEGGING‼️😭

(I love your blog sm❤️😭)

7) Them exploring each others' bodies, but not in a sexual way.

8) Finding their different birthmarks, looking over each others' scars and sharing the stories behind them, running their hands over one another, and just appreciating the feeling of the other person next to them.

AAAAAAAAAA I'M SORRYYYYYYYYYYY HERE IT COMEEEES!!!!!!!!!!!

I'M DOING MY BEST WITH ALL THE REQUESTS, SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG OMG😭😭😭😭💕

NSFW prompts!

(this one turned out so cute, i truly love it, here to worship soft madara for life)

Candlelight illuminates the outline of his body just enough, a gloomy atmosphere surrounded by the intensity of the night. Madara takes a puff of his kiseru, holding the smoke and releasing it after a few seconds. The yukata he wears looks like trying to escape from his body, slightly held by the cord that ties it around his waist and leaving all the expansion of his chest uncovered.

Divine laws oblige them to consummate the marriage they were forced to perform, but neither seems interested in forcing the other to have sex just because the gods demand it. The night that should have been filled with passion was replaced by pleasant talks, getting to know each other, preferring words over intimate touches.

Leaning against the back of the bed, one hand behind his head and the other occupied with his vice, he gazes into nothingness, eyes busy with thoughts and memories (Y/N) assumes must plague his mind.

The woman lies on his skin, using his chest as a pillow and running her fingertips along the expanse of his body. Within two seconds of starting she stumbles upon a scar near his neck, admiring it and stunned by the length and time it seems to have been in his flesh. "That was Hashirama, funny enough. Our first serious confrontation under the watchful eye of our parents."

The Uchiha lets out some smoke, instinctively following his wife's touch on his skin, staring into nothingness and thinking of the memories her fingers evoke with each area they traverse. (Y/N) doesn't take long to notice another mark, 3 large lines on his stomach also denoting age, "Tobirama's summoning, massive snow leopard. It was about to eat Izuna, had to do something."

He laughs at that memory, and (Y/N) takes the initiative from his laughter to sit on the bed and open his yukata even wider, paying genuine attention to the man's torso. One would think she should be more cautious in front of a guy she was forced to marry, but the two built a friendly bond before even admiring each other in a loving, insinuating way, gaining confidence in each other as each day went by.

Jokes and funny gestures became part of their routine, genuinely falling in love despite the marriage alliance forcing them to be together.

Madara looks at her suggestively as he takes another puff of smoke, and uses his kiseru to point to a scar on her right shoulder. "Learning to use kunai, father was unforgiving." The woman recounts with her own smile, her childhood coming in waves through her mind.

Before getting emotional, she turns her attention to a gigantic mark on top of his heart, the largest scar on his chest, the one she never had the courage to ask what it was due to, who caused it. The woman always assumed that it must have been his major war wound, an attack that left him almost on the verge of losing his life, as it occupies most of his right breastplate.

She has seen him changing clothes on several occasions, getting out of the shower, opportunities to appreciate the scar in all its enormous splendor. Whoever inflicted it was probably trying to kill him with all their might.

She never dared to ask why was there, afraid to evoke complicated memories, but this seemed like the perfect opportunity, "Where did this come from?" intones coyly, avoiding eye contact and fixing her eyes on the scar.

"Actually, Izuna." The Uchiha laughs again, but this time it's such a loud fit of laughter he literally cries out of joy, traveling back to the exact moment of the event, "little fucker was testing a new technique, an "amazing wonderful spectacular jutsu that will destroy that idiot Tobirama in one hit!" he called it." He wipes his eyes, trying to compose himself to speak, but little chuckles escape him as he relates what happened, "turns out it was indeed good, good enough to almost kill me in the attempt, I let my guard down because I didn't believe it would work, proved I couldn't underestimate him."

His face lights up when he talks about his brother, and (Y/N) can't help but be tempted to laugh along with him even though he's narrating a near-death experience. "What's up with this?" the man takes advantage of the distraction to point out a dark mark on her leg, prominent and perfectly circular. "A… clan initiation rites, we all get branded when we turn five. Kinship and stuff, you know."

"What's your worst scar, (Y/N)?" Madara asks, turning his attention back to his vice and filling his lungs with smoke, looking at her with soft eyes and tenderly stroking her exposed skin. The way he looks at her makes (Y/N) feel like the most beautiful woman in the world, and the love he has for her is palpable in his smile.

"I'd say this one?" she turns around to show him her back, lowering her yukata down to her waist and revealing skin affected by a long, dark gash. She can hear the Uchiha hiss at the image, and it fills her with pride to have one of the strongest warriors in history recognize her battle scars as well. "That must have hurt, yes?" He comments as the smoke pours out of his mouth.

"Yeah, it was kind of traumatic... I was little, my first war engagement, everyone thought I'd die yet here I am..." She feels two large arms grab her from behind, wrapping her in a deep, loving embrace. Madara rests his head on her shoulder, placing his lips on her cheek and moving down to her neck with innocent little kisses, "You're the strongest woman I know, you know that?"

"Could we say you won the lottery?"

"You wish."

[hello-nichya-here]

Do you think Juan was in love with Lucrezia too and that's why Cesare hated him?

When I first watched the show, that was the furthest thing from my mind, mostly because Juan annoyed me to no end, but after seeing an interview in which the actor said he always felt his character was upset that he couldn't join Cesare and Lucrezia, I paid more attention to him on my rewatches - mainly to Juan's pattern of trying to murder the men his sisters falls in love with.

Because of that, yes, I think Juan, whether he knew it or not, was likely interested in sleeping with Lucrezia, but he was not in love with her - at least not in the same way Cesare was.

It's no coincidence that Cesare humiliated and killed Lucrezia's abusive husband as revenge for raping her, while Juan didn't do shit about it. That Juan threatened Lucrezia's son, while Cesare was fighting for her right keep him around after remarrying. That her first two love interests died by Juan's hand, while Cesare tried to save them and even hesitated to kill her second husband (until he started posing a threat by making it clear he'd snitch on them about the incest) because "I would not harm that which my sister loves."

Both relationships can be summarised by Lucrezia's line of "Only a Borgia can truly a Borgia." For her and Cesare that means "As family, we understand and care for each other in a way no one else could, we have to stick together", while for Juan it means "Everyone else is inferior to us."

Juan has one hell of big ego and is constantly trying to seem more competent than he actually is - to the point that he doesn't want to marry A KING'S DAUGHTER because she's illegitimate, even though he couldn't stop fucking her, even after she married the youngest Borgia (and was then written out of existence with him).

He literally corrects a prostitute who called him "The Pope's bastard" by saying he is the Pope's SON. And when he acts with disgusted towards Lucrezia's child for being illegitimate, he dismisses her point about him being a major hypocrite by reminding her "I'm a BORGIA bastard."

Juan's family is important and he's well aware of it - he uses it as sword and shield for everything. It would not surprise me if he either became interested in Lucrezia because she's the one woman that isn't "lesser" or at least uses "Well, I'm a Borgia" to avoid any guilt he could feel over his attraction towards her.

Now, don't get me wrong, he DOES have that strong feeling of belonging, understanding and family as well - but he has it towards RODRIGO, and to a lesser extent, Cesare himself.

He looks genuinely afraid and devastated at the rumor that either him or Cesare isn't actually a product of their mother's affair with Rodrigo, but rather the legitimate child she had with her actual husband (again, that's despite the fact that Juan has a complex about being a bastard, which says a lot), he clearly wants his father's approval, and his death happens after he tried to give CESARE a way to get rid of all his pain through drugs.

But while he can show affection towards Lucrezia sometimes, he doesn't show the same reverence and respect (however grudging, like with Cesare). I think that happens for a few reasons:

1 - Misogyny. Juan was always very aggressive in any sexual situation, and we see that he is not at all above full on assaulting a woman to deal with his anger - hell, he rapes an innocent girl that just happened to walk past him because he's mad at a different woman for humiliating him, and since said woman is not around, he just grabs the first vulnerable peson he sees.

Lucrezia might be spared of that because she's family, but you can't expect a violent misogyny to ever be too kind to any woman. Again, that's why he killed two of her lovers and threatened her child -Juan is being violent towards the men (or boys) around her because he can't/won't give himself permission of being violent towards her directly. Lucrezia is to him what Ursula was to Cesare, an object of affection/obsession, not an equal.

2 - Lucrezia's age. Not only is Lucrezia the youngest (at least after Joffrey was written out of existence), at the start of the show she's still 14 while both of her older brothers are already adults. Juan is not going to take a literal child seriously. It's just not gonna happen. And because the age gap is much larger, I think part of him will always see her as a little girl (even Cesare feels like that to some extent).

3 - Lucrezia's (former?) kind nature. There's a reason he looks shaken when she tries to kill him, even though he just murdered the father of her child. Juan legit did not know his sister was capable of matching his violence if he pushed her too far - and Cesare only killed him after LUCREZIA basically gave him the order/green light. This man was playing with fire and had no fucking idea. To him, she was just his naive, innocent, harmless younger sister. She's to be cherished and protected, not taken seriously like their father and brother.

Now, while I think the fact that Juan 100% knew something was going on between his siblings (he was even the first character to openly acknowledge it, for God's sake) mostly likely played a role in why he loved pissing Cesare off so much, I don't think Lucrezia was in anyway a factor on why Cesare hated Juan (again, until he started hurting her by harming the people she cared about) because:

1 - Cesare might be in denial sometimes, but he knows damn well he is his sister's soulmate. She even say's "I could never love a husband as much as I love YOU." Their brother was far less of a threat than her already mediocre lovers, whom Cesare didn't really have too many issues with - and honestly, Juan probably took NOT being seen as a legitimate rival on that regard as a deep insult.

2 - Cesare, just like Juan, desperately wants Rodrigo's approval, and his whole complex is about their father giving his brother far more freedom and praise than he ever got.

They had the Caim and Abel vibes for a LONG time.

[galacticwarpedlense]

Bachelorettes as parents!

Finally got the part 2 to this.

Let’s start with-

Abigail

I think Abby as a mom would be an over correction for her own parents. Like too freeing. She seemed to feel controlled in her household so she may be afraid to control her own kid and that kid may lack some motherly guidance until the farmer steps in and gives Abby the confidence to guide the child. On the bright side, that child will definitely get to experiment with style and identity without feeling unsafe or stifled. Also Abby would probably attempt to help her kid with homework only to be stumped to because the wording was weird or because she was never good at the subject.

Leah

Leah… lowkey, I have no idea. She just doesn’t seem like the mom type. If I were to make a guess, with her and the farmer having pretty unconventional jobs, the child will at least feel confident that they can choose any way of living and with enough effort, it would work out. Sorry this one is short, I genuinely think Leah and the Farmer would be more like a childless couple. The farm animals and their cat/dog are their children.

Haley

At the beginning of her arc, she was giving entitled mom, but with her learning to be more caring and understanding, I feel like as a mom she would be more like a neo entitled parent, like she seems entitled but she’s actually really nice and reasonable. Also with her being a photographer, she has a full album of photos with her spouse and child throughout the years. Probably calls up her own mom or the moms of the town for advice when she doesn’t know what to do with her kid. If her kid is sporty, you bet she’s going to every single game, even if it’s just the little practices in the yard. Maybe with enough bugging, the kid could get her to participate in the practice too.

Maru

Let’s start with her flaw, she has way too high of expectations for herself, the farmer and probably their kid. As a parent, she would have to learn to put those expectations down for her child’s sake. And while she loves her dad, at this point she would probably be aware of his favoritism in order to not repeat it with her own kids. In fact, she would probably be the type to lay down the law and force Seb and Demetrius to get their act together if they want to spend time with her kid. There will be no familial fighting around the child, they must get along. That’s Maru’s biggest asset, once made aware of an issue, she’ll solve it and this goes double for her child.

Emily

The hippie mom, it is written in stone for that one. She is the funky hippie mom that embarrasses her kid for shits and giggles. Very overly affectionate and fun loving. Another parents that just wants her kid to enjoy childhood. Will that child be very embarrassed by their mom? Yes. Will that child also have oddly effective life skills and emotional stability that other children their age will never have? Absolutely. Like Abigail, that child will get to freely experiment with things that other parents would be more restrictive on.

And last but certainly not least with parenting

Penny

Now canonically you can only have 2 kids with each spouse but we don’t need to worry about that because I killed canon behind a Denny’s. Anyways, big family. There is no only child with Penny. She would be the one to have like a LOT of children and be stressed out of her mind and then ask the farmer “So when are we going to have another?” However raising children is harder than just teaching them so she would have a few struggles thanks to her own messy home life. Pam would be another case of “Get your act together before you can see my children”. Also NO alcohol in the house. None. It might actually get a little controlling how much Penny won’t allow drinking. But it has a good reason.

[vulpes-ferus]

FFXIV LFRP On Hiatus

Full name: Miyako Akane

Race: Auspice/Yokai

Gender: Genderfluid? Nonbinary? Really, it's whatever they feel like at the moment. Her pronouns depend on the skin she's in at the time: she/they, or he/they. Typically prefers her female presenting form unless her masculine form is more preferable to those she's interacting with.

Sexuality: All of it. Anything.

Marital Status: Single! She's not settling down, she's always on the prowl.

Age: Several centuries old

Profession: She doesn't have one! Though technically they may read your cards or offer a boon...for a price, and she rarely accepts actual currency

Hobbies: Pranking mortals. Preying on mortals. Seducing mortals, people watching... and generally just about anything to do with the forest, or nature.

Hair: Dark orange/white accents

Eyes: Amber

Distinguishing Marks: Typically veiled as a Miqo'te, there is little distinguishing about her person to those unable to see through the magic she uses - although on occasion, one might spot a fluffier tail than she actually seems to have, out of the corner of their eye. To those able to see through this magic... she's quite a bit different than her feline glamour would suggest to the average person. In their feminine presenting forms, she always has red tattoo-markings around her eyes.

RP Hooks

She's still as-yet un-roleplayed, so there's a lot of potential - and there's less impetus for me to want longer storylines on her, so if you just want a few one-off scenes to have your cards read or the like, those are easier on her than on my other characters, though I'm always a sucker for a long plot/storyline that's steeped in character growth! Never be afraid to approach me if you have an idea!

Maybe you want your cards read! I have several tarot decks IRL, and an oracle deck that's well-suited to her too, and I could no doubt use the practice, myself. She essentially makes fey bargains - deals with weird prices that aren't always clear at first.

She may be centuries old, but she was barely over a century when she was imprisoned out in the East, and only escaped her magical prison in the last couple years! (I was, in fact, inspired by JJK and Sukuna for her imprisonment.) She ran from the East and took a new face to pose as, since she was captured and imprisoned in the East, and the people there still respect the old legends... and the Black Shroud is an excellent forest, vibrant with life! ...and unsuspecting mortals.

Speaking of the Black Shroud, there's a lot of ways to interact with her in regard to that! You could randomly run into her. She could do what kitsune do in the old tales, and lure you off the road at night and get you lost. Maybe you've seen something weird in the forest, or heard strange tales from travelers. Maybe you're just really in tune with the elementals and they've mentioned a new entity in the forest...really, I'm open to about anything with some talk about it beforehand!

She feeds on aether! She doesn't have to kill people to do this, though she's certainly not above it - what are morals to an animal, anyways? Food is food. Prey is prey. But sometimes, it's easier to just seduce someone and feed on their aether, before leaving them naked and drained in the forest to have a laugh at their expense.

Given her long imprisonment, much about the world is new to her! Maybe you lure her in by showing her all the nifty new stuff there is, and blowing her mind at how much things have changed in a few hundred years.

You could be an antagonist! Hunt her, if you like! Maybe she hurt you, or someone you care(d) about! Maybe you're from the East and found out her prison was dismantled, and you fear yokai; or you're just a Shroud Dweller who has been wronged, etc.

Romance! While I don't tend to like interactions that are solely focused on seeking out ERP - she is a sensual creature, and physical intimacy is an indulgence and a way to consume aether... though I don't know how she'd feel about genuine romance... last time she indulged in that, it got her caught and imprisoned!

She likes pranks/mischief... and sometimes that mischief can seem cruel if you don't understand the mindset of a creature of the wild. Engage her on her level, and she might find you more 'fun' than 'food'.

Alternately, she carries her soul around in an orb she wears as jewelry, and if someone got their hands on it, it'd be bad news for her!

About anything you can think of and want to brainstorm together! She's an alt that's good for long-term or short-term RP; serious, or not-so-serious moments... there's plenty of potential!

The OOC

Writer is 30+, and I prefer RP partners to be 21+ - I do prefer darker, more mature RP, but that's not all I'm capable of! I just like morally grey explorations - and questions like 'what really drives a person?'

Late nights aren't really something I can do anymore, past 11-12pm my writing isn't any good, though my schedule is open enough to allow earlier starting times. Also I'm CST, and prefer in-game RP. I simply can't stay in character when RP isn't moving in real time, and tend to just forget to respond to out of game stuff, or not feel well enough to write some days, and it ends up taking so long that I can't stay in character. Thus, scheduling in-game scenes ahead of time will always be what works best for me.

No canon characters please, it just really breaks my immersion/my character wouldn't have any reason to interact with canon characters really! Unfortunately, this means WoL OCs as well - their power level is just so intense that I can't really justify my OCs interacting with the WoL: time-traveling slayer of gods at the edges of the universe. (And no shade to canon RPers of any kind - it's just not my cup of tea, is all. Embrace your fun, my friends!) I also don't mind bending lore, but outright ignoring/breaking with it is also not really for me - and again, there's no judgement for how others choose to have fun, but I like to respect the canon.

I prefer plots, and RP with a purpose - contact solely focused on ERP is not welcome. ERP as part of an on-going story doesn't bother me, however.

Don't bring IC into OOC, or vice verse!

Communicate! If the RP isn't working for you, just tell me! I prefer 'organic RP,' but if you want to steer a story (RP) in a certain direction or don't want it steering in a direction, let me know! I much prefer having that conversation, rather than allowing an RP partner to be silently upset or uncomfortable!Follows come from @ooc-miqojak , and my other blogs are @miqojak and @antlers-and-omens!

[muffinrecord]

Himena's magical girl story was really good but also really terrifying and I don't mean the part where Himena tells Sasha, "If you wanted me to, I would kill your uncle for you tee-hee."

The earlier bits where she has anxiety about if her friends were leaving her was absolutely anxiety-inducing for me, but mostly because... I've had friends like this and we do not mix whatsoever. Personally, I'm the kind of person who needs her space. If I couldn't hang out with someone and they sent me a thousand texts and phone calls: that would be the last time I'd ever talk to them because you bet your ass I'd be afraid of them. The Hiko bits in particular made it hard to watch. It was suffocating!

I think Hiko genuinely loves her, probably. But god. Imagine if he wanted to escape her and was lightly rebuffing her this whole time out of politeness, then he started getting bullied... and then things got worse, and he couldn't escape his bullies or Himena. Then he commits suicide to escape the whole situation. AND THEN SHE BRINGS HIM BACK IN HER FUCKING BRAIN.

This is peak nightmare fuel for me specifically. Being stuck in someone's head. Without my permission. Forever. I'd beg Himena to kill me again a second time, probably.

Oh but to add, I stand by my earlier comments on Himena, that I don't think she's a bad person. Like for me she is terrifying, but that's cause of my own issues specifically. I think she's a person who really needs therapy and validation. I think she's been alone and ostracized and surrounded by fake friends for a long time, and it's led her to a lot of pain. She's so scared of going back into that whirlwind of pain that she's willing to do anything, be anything, as long as she never feels it again. And I think that's a very human thing to feel, whether it means you're scared of losing people or if you're scared of being around them.

I have a few thoughts that she might have Borderline Personality Disorder but... that one can get stigmatized badly and I hate to put that on the character that tried to genocide all of Kamihama at one point. BPD gets enough shit online, I don't want to add on "hey this homicidal character looks like u lol," you know? :/

She also seems very teenager to me, and not just in the manner she speaks. Girl hasn't experienced enough of life yet to realize that sometimes people are just busy and it's not all about you. I mean that in the kindest way possible.

...

Actually, having said that-- you know, there are a loooot of people online who dislike Himena, who act like Hikos. But having met a few of them, they tend to have a lot more in common with Himena than with Hiko-- particularly with that self-centeredness. If you don't talk to them every day, they think you hate them and lash out and want to hate you more. Anything you do is a sign meant for them to interpret. That sort of thing.

It makes me wonder if (some of) the Himena haters look at her and see an aspect of themselves that they don't like.

Anyways, I definitely recommend watching her Magical Girl Story. Some parts of it feel a little exposition-y, but it's all good and it's an interesting dive into her brain. I'd actually be really interested to hear from someone who can relate to her more than I can and what they think of her MGS.