jjmaybankshousekeeping · 10 months ago
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long time no sex - jj maybank
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summary - yn goes on vacation for two weeks, leaving jj horny as ever. when she gets back, she makes a decision with john b to try to go as long as possible without doing anything with jj, which she quickly fails.
warnings - full on smut, pet names (baby, babe, darlin’, sweetheart), words such as cock, pussy, shaft and hole are used, jj with a breeding kink?, oral (f given), hand jobs (m given), unprotected sex (WRAP IT BEFORE YOU TAP IT), lil bit of fluff.
a/n - this took me like two days cause i’ve never written full on smut before and i was struggling sm, please lmk what y’all think 🙏
word count - 2,198
post number - 8
reader - she/her, fem.
after a long vacation, yn couldn’t wait to see her boyfriend. the closer john b drove her to the chateau, the more excited she got to see jj.
she’d been gone for two weeks and now she got to see him again.
“yn?” john b broke the silence.
she looked at him, “yeah?”
“please don’t fuck in my house.”
yn made the most shocked face she possibly could, “what- why would we hav- what?!”
“i know you two; you can’t keep your hands off each other for two seconds, and jj has been dying without you here.”
“in what means?”
“he got a hard on from an eighty year old woman picking up her bag that she dropped.” he beat around the bush.
yn snickered, “oh my god! should i make him wait as long as possible just to tease him?”
“yes, definitely. i’ve been meaning to get him back for his pranks recently.”
“you? you’re gonna do the prank?”
john b chuckled, “no but if i agree to it then technically i’m in on it. right?”
“suppose so.”
“i don’t think you’ll be able to go five minutes - either one of you.”
“shut up, jb.”
after another few minutes, they’d finally arrived at the small home, where jj was already waiting on the porch steps. when he saw the van pull up, he immediately jogged over to the passengers side of the van, opening the door to pull his girlfriend out.
he pulled yn towards him as soon as her seatbelt was removed. he pulled her into a hug, as she wrapped her legs around his body.
“hi, baby.” she mumbled into his neck.
jj inhaled yn’s scent, “oh, i’ve missed you so much.”
“i’ve heard.” she looked at him, smirking.
his eyebrows furrowed in confusion, “what?”
“oh, nothing, jb just told me a little something on the ride over.”
he thought for a second, then immediately knew what she meant. he dropped his girlfriend to the floor, only after making sure her feet were on the ground, before turning to john b.
“bro. seriously?”
“it was funny.”
“no, it wasn’t.” jj defended.
“it really was.”
jj turned away, “fuck you, then.”
“aw, poor little baby, jj.” yn teased, “did you get a hard on from someone’s grandma? poor you.”
“i hate you.”
“can we go in now?” john b whined.
and so, the three of them went inside.
for a few hours, yn and jj laid in bed, relaxing, with netflix playing in the background while they conversed. everything was going smoothly until yn made another joke about grandmas.
“fuck you!” jj shouted, pinning his girlfriend down to the bed. yn squealed, trying to wiggle free as the blonde boy held her down by the wrists.
“you wanna carry on?” jj raised his eyebrows.
yn held back her laughter, “no.”
“are you gonna stop now?”
the girl thought for a moment, “no.”
jj got up in yn’s face, “what’s that darling?”
“no.” she got shy, lowering her voice.
“gonna have to do something about that.” their faces were practically touching at this point; they could feel each other’s breath against their skin.
before yn could even reply, jj pressed his lips against his girlfriends, their lips melted together as if it were in their body’s nature to do so.
their lips moved together quickly, but not too quickly. jj’s left hand crept from around yn’s wrist to around her neck, while his other hand slipped down to her thigh.
he gently pressed his hand against her neck - in response, her mouth slightly opened, and a soft whimper came out.
“do that again.” jj whispered into her ear.
“i can’t just make it happen, jj.”
jj moved his lips down from her lips to her neck, nipping at her skin, softly. he knew the response he would get this time - soft, quiet little moans fell from his girlfriends mouth.
his smirk pressed against her collarbone as he left small red marks on her skin. his hands moved to the hem of yn’s shirt.
“can i take this off?” he asked.
“yeah.” she whispered.
without wasting a moment, jj had already taken the girls shirt off and it was now laying on his bedroom floor.
yn’s hand quickly got tangled in jj’s locks as his lips pressed against her breasts.
“jj” she softly bit her lip, holding back a moan.
“good girl.” he praised, “i love your little moans, darlin’, but jb probably wants you to keep quiet. can you do that for me?”
she nodded, getting a soft peck on the lips in return.
jj took his own shirt off, then his shorts, leaving him in nothing but his boxers. by now, jj’s cock pressed against yn’s core, causing a lot of friction. jj removed his lips from around yn’s nipples, going up to her ear.
he nibbled her ear gently, “fuck, you feel what you’re doing to me, sweetheart?”
“fuck me, jj. i can’t wait any longer. it’s been two weeks.”
“tell me about it.” he responded, pulling down his girlfriends jeans, before going to pull off her panties, “this okay?”
“yeah.”
jj quickly discarded of his girlfriends final item of clothing, throwing it onto the floor.
his fingers made their way into his girlfriends pussy, not moving until after he’d spit to make sure it wasn’t going to be uncomfortable, even though she was already wet.
he started with two fingers, slowly pumping them in and out, getting yn’s pussy used to the feeling again. the moans that were now falling from yn’s ears sounded like music to jj’s ears.
jj nipped at yn’s thigh for a moment, leaving another mark, before his tongue made its way to her clit. as his fingers sped up, his tongue was soft, moving up her clit, qs if he was stroking it. as her breathing got heavier, jj sped up his fingers and tensed his tongue slightly, earning godly praise falling from yn’s lips.
“fuck- jj! that feels so good!” one of her hands was tangled in jj’s hair still, while the other was gripping on the bedsheets for dear life.
jj felt yn’s body start to twitch and shake beneath him, hinting that she was close.
waiting for a whimper, which usually let him know she was going to reach her high, he asked, “you close, baby?”
“mhm-“ she whimpered, biting her lip, begging her mouth to stay quiet.
gripping the bedsheets were no longer enough, and yn gripped jj’s hair with her other hand, basically yanking at it now.
jj slipped another finger into his girlfriend’s hole, and his tongue became more passionate as he licked her clit.
“jj! fuck, i’m gonna cum.” she moaned.
“cum for me, darlin’.”
jj’s fingers sped up, going as deep as he could get them, curling them slightly, in order to hit that spot that got yn to climax.
his fingers were now covered in a sticky, cloudy substance, “fuck, baby. you okay?”
“yeah.” she breathed, “that was so good.”
jj reached for a wipe, as he wasn’t one that was much for licking his fingers clean, wiping the cum from his fingers.
“you ready for my cock now, darl?” he asked, pressing a soft kiss to her lips.
she nodded, not giving him the consent he was after.
“verbal.” he spoke, in a low tone.
“yes. please, jj.” yn was practically begging.
finally getting the consent he needed, he discarded of his boxers, also tossing them to the ground.
yn got up to kneel, and wrapped her hand around jj’s shaft. she leant over to spit, making her movements smoother and less uncomfortable for jj.
they were both aware that she wasn’t giving him a full on handjob, just getting him completely hard, but she wanted to tease him a bit. her spare hand crept underneath to jj’s balls, giving them the slightest squeeze possible; jj’s head fell straight into yn’s neck as she stroked his cock, letting out a groan into her skin.
“fuck, baby.” he groaned, “don’t play with me like this.”
she chuckled, “just getting you warmed up, jay.”
while yn stroked jj’s hard on, he went back to pecking at her neck, occasionally nibbling and sucking at her skin.
“oh my god-“ jj held back laughter.
“what?”
“i just gave you a huge hickey, babe.”
yn’s irises widened, “what?!”
she picked up the closest phone to her, which happened to be jj’s and checked in the camera.
“jj!” she scolded, “my brothers are gonna kill me, you dick!”
“i can make it up to you?”
she smirked, as jj tilted in response, almost as if he were asking an actual question. almost as if they were in sync, jj practically dove at yn as she pressed her lips to jj’s.
jj lifted his girlfriend’s leg up and pulled her closer, pressing his cock against her core.
“you ready?” he asked.
“fuck, yeah.”
jj pulled out a tube of lube from his bedside table before smearing a small amount over his cock, then tossed it onto the pillow next to them.
“condom?” he asked, checking what yn wanted.
“nah. i’ve got plan b in your drawer.”
he nodded, then he rubbed his dick up and down her folds, teasing her by rubbing it occasionally on her clit, causing her lower body to slightly twitch.
when yn gave him the okay, he slowly pressed is dick into yn’s hole, trying not to cause her too much discomfort, as it had been a while.
“you hurtin’?” jj asked, genuinely concerned.
“no, just feels a bit strange.”
“am i okay to move then?”
she nodded, “mhm.” giving him the verbal consent she knew jj was after.
jj slowly moved back and forth, pushing in and out of yn’s pussy. he leant into his girlfriend, placing one hand on her hip, and the other on her jaw, before passionately kissing her.
their lips moved as if they were molded together, when jj knew that yn was okay, from the small moan that fell against his own lips, his pace sped up.
“baby-“ yn grabbed jj’s shoulder, “fuck- go faster, jj.”
jj’s hips thrusted in and out faster than before, hitting yn’s cervix, repeatedly.
yn could no longer kiss jj; her nails were currently digging into his back, as her teeth were softly pressing into jj’s neck, “fuck me, jj.”
“i am, darlin’.” he breathed.
by now they were both a complete mess, hickeys all over the both of them, teeth marks in jj’s neck, nail marks on yn’s hip and scratches across jj’s back.
jj threw his head back, flicking his now sweaty hair out of his face, in order to see his beautiful girlfriend again.
“fuck- you’re so beautiful.” he moaned, admiring yn’s body.
she pulled jj closer to her, as his cock twitched inside her and her vision was partially covered by white spots. she kissed jj, as they both couldn’t hold back anymore - their breaths became one, as they moaned and groaned in between kisses onto each other lips.
“i’m gonna cum, sweetheart.” jj informed yn, pressing his head into the inside of her neck.
“me.. too-“ she struggled to breath out.
as they were getting closer and closer to reaching their highs, jj’s hips slapped against yn’s skin faster and harder than before, he almost couldn’t control it anymore.
“can i cum inside you?” he asked.
“yes, fuck- please cum inside me, jj” she moaned, consenting once again.
with the consent he was given, he thrusted into his girlfriend a few more times, before the both of them had their orgasms.
jj pressed his forehead against yn’s, slowly thrusting, as yn held his head.
“i love you so much.” yn whispered.
“i love you too, baby.” jj responded, pressing a kiss to her lips, before flopping down onto the pillow next to him, “ow, forgot i put that there.”
jj passed the lube to yn, who then placed it into the drawer next to her.
both their chests were quickly moving up and down as they caught their breaths.
“can i clean you up, sweetheart?”
“yeah, jay.”
jj reached to grab a tissue from the bedside table next to him, and gently wiped around yn’s now sensitive areas, wiping the substances off her, then grabbing a wipe to properly clean her. he then threw them both into the bin before laying back down, only for yn to do the same cleaning process to jj.
“i don’t understand why you never clean yourself off after me.”
“guess i just prioritise you.”
“how cute.” yn joked.
jj chuckled, “shut up. wanna stay here for a bit or do you wanna get some food and a drink?”
“i’m kinda hungry.”
“let’s get changed then and we can go grab some food.” jj responded, getting up, before pulling his girlfriend up with him, making sure she stabilised herself before he let go of her.
they both got changed before they left jj’s room and headed into the kitchen area of the chateau.
while jj made food, yn went over to john b, and whispered, “i failed.”
“i know. my poor ears had to hear it all.”
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satoruhour · 1 year ago
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omg I’d love to hear more about baby fever + gojo 🥹 just watching him match a babies babbles like he can actually understand them is killing me!!
a/n: omg stop anon this is so CUTE?? and ik i posted like three things today but posts will be slower this week since i still have work to do technically even if i have a school break ! / one sex joke lol
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gojo always had a knack for caregiving — whether it was defending yuta against the higher-ups and advocating for yuji’s life (even if it had to be delayed) and making sure that one kid had gotten home safely after getting trapped in an abandoned home. but you realised you’ve never really seen your boyfriend around babies. it wasn’t a good idea in the first place, to mix babies and sorcerers — part of why nanami had waited so long before starting a family with his partner, or how utahime turned in her resignation for good after getting pregnant.
but now that you’re past terrible things in the world like sukuna and kenjaku and you both have properly buried your best friend’s body, you’re looking ahead to better things. you’re not too keen on kids, but you do sometimes spiral into what your kid with satoru would look like, probably taking the bulk of his features while some of yours are fighting to take first place. that sentiment is changed more and more when you see how gojo interacts with kids.
it’s when nanami first invites everyone to their (long overdue) baby shower, only wanting to introduce his partner and kid only a year after they’ve been safe. nanami is the happiest he’s ever been but so is gojo, dancing so foolishly in front of the kid to get her to like him that all she does is scrunch her face and hide back in her mother’s neck (“yeah, that’s nanami’s kid alright.”). soon, she’s let go to interact with the students, playing around with megumi’s dogs, running around the house from yuji and inumaki, doing silly battle poses with the girls. her laughter is like beauty to all the grown-ups in the room, something meant to be protected and cherished.
gojo tries to win her back, sitting on the floor so his height wouldn’t be too imposing and she almost runs into him. his infinity stops her and her head cocks to the side in confusion — she continues to run into gojo’s shield again and again, giggles at being constantly pushed back with a silly sound gojo makes with his mouth; it convinces her enough that she’s running into a bubble of some jelly. 
it’s some time later where you’re mingling with nanami’s partner, talking to shoko and utahime while your boyfriend chats with nanami (weirdly normal, you note) about everything. but you’re broken out of conversation when you hear gojo quietly squeal to his junior who only sighs. it’s all a facade; you know he’s actually glad his daughter succumbs to gojo’s charms soon enough, letting him carry the small toddler who’s already oh so tired from the day. she melts into satoru’s arms, mumbling something incoherent that he replies just as incoherently and bounces.
satoru strokes her hair, speaking in a hushed tone now, something that rarely happens in your home and it convinces nanami just a little to make him her godfather. he’s still considering it.
the next time it happens is when he meets utahime’s baby boy for the first time, coming over to provide some gifts and to just see your old friends. it’s a little hilarious how the first two people to have children are the people who are not particularly fond of gojo but both nanami and utahime are surprisingly tame when it comes to the strongest handling their kid. she’s giving him her baby carefully with a clear threat behind her eyes but he knows not to fuck anything up. the baby is clueless enough to not know who he was even being handed to, babbling mindlessly while drool leaves his mouth.
“babba boo-boo,” it’s gibberish, but satoru matches it perfectly, making stupid sounds back at the baby that you can’t help but grin. “wahbaba boo!” gojo continues to coo and mumble insults with a pointed finger to hime, “your mom is too uptight, can you tell her to calm down a little?” which gets a little hey! from the retired sorcerer and the baby attempts to copy his pointing. “mambama!” utahime’s and her partner’s soft gasp is all you need to know that they haven’t heard their baby call any of them, yet.
the baby continues his babbles and blows a raspberry, face lighting up at the bubbles he manages to make with saliva and gojo just has to laugh at how easily entertained children are. you’re stood there, heart melting with the gentleness in which he treats kids, because once the little one is handed back to utahime and you’re saying your goodbyes, you can’t even look at your lover without feeling lightheaded.
“you’re good with kids, y’know.” you’re saying as you remove your coat while satoru toes off his shoes in your home, your shared space. it feels unreal.
gojo pfts, “of course, baby!” he does a cute pose with thumb pointing toward him, “i’m just that good at everything.”
you laugh, “’course you are…” pulling him down, you have to kiss him or else you’d be overflowing with all the love you have for him and it’ll spill everywhere. gojo eases you into the kiss, humming and sighing in contentment.
“i’m just wondering…” you mumble, a little nervous. you’ve never thought of kids that much even but you think it might be due time even if you didn’t have a ring on your finger. “if you ever thought of having a kid with me?”
satoru’s face softens and you can hear his smile, “of course i do, princess. every time.” his voice is soft when he says it and the way it flips your heart makes you dizzy. “but only when you’re ready. and only when i’ve put a big fat rock on your fourth, although if you’re interested in a shotgun…”
you have to shoot him the finger before you’re nodding to yourself just to remind that everything depends on you. even if it takes 5, 10 years, or even if you didn’t want any children at all, gojo is enamoured with you too much to let it be a dealbreaker.
“i want it… soon.” gojo laughs softly at that, taking you into his arms right at your doorstep and kisses you deeply once again. you brace yourself against his toned chest, clutching at his coat with tippy toes. in classic gojo satoru fashion, he has to pull away to make a dirty joke.
“i’m surprised that you aren’t knocked up already with how much i c—”
“gojo satoru. if you finish that sentence—!”
“—um in you…”
you pull a face, resorting to smacking him on the arm and he surrenders with loud laughter and an apology filled with pecks and kisses. standing at the doorway, you’d never think it would happen so soon.
two months later, satoru is getting down on one knee and asking you to marry him.
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lonesome-witching · 1 year ago
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Engagement Rings
Another day, another prompt. Even though I don't post daily anymore. Thank you so much for yet another ronance prompt for me to write. In this episode of 'whatever people want me to write' Nancy and Robin show off their engagement rings.
You can read my old prompts or send me new ones.
Nancy took a last glance at the diamond ring around her left ring finger before zipping up her bag.
“Robin! I’m heading out!” she yelled toward the bedroom where she knew Robin was getting ready for her own day.
For once Nancy wasn’t leaving to head to the office. Instead, she would have breakfast with El. It was something Nancy had been looking forward to since long before the engagement. Before Robin had stumbled her way through the question. Before Nancy had felt the yes on the tip of her tongue, waiting to slip out. But now, she had a diamond ring to show off and today’s breakfast seemed even more exciting.
“Alright, I’ll see you later. Have fun!” Robin shouted back.
“You too!”
She could vaguely hear Robin mumble something before she stepped out of the apartment. It was only a five minute walk from her home to the diner. El was already waiting in a corner booth. The girl jumped up and waved when she saw Nancy enter. Nancy waved back with her left hand. Out of the corner of her eye she could see the silver band of the ring. Her smile widened as she walked up to the booth.
“Hi, how are you?” Nancy greeted and hugged her friend tightly.
“Hi!” El hugged back just as tight, one of her hands stroking Nancy’s head. “Oh, I’m fine. How are you?”
“I’m great.”
They both sat down. Nancy unconsciously placed her hands on the tabletop. She wasn’t trying to show off the ring, but it didn’t take long for El to notice the new addition.
“What is that?” El grabbed Nancy’s left hand, carefully holding it in her own. “It’s beautiful.”
“It’s­— Robin asked me to marry her.”
“No?” El’s eyes widened. “That is incredible. Oh, that is so exciting. How did she propose? Was it romantic? Tell me everything.”
“Okay, so, she cooked this delicious dinner and she had put up candles and she had burned both of her hands. She allowed me to complain about work for at least an hour. She just sat there with this cute but mischievous smile on her face and she nodded to indicate she was listening. And then she got down on one knee and just asked me. It was everything I wanted it to be.”
---
Robin twirled the new ring around her finger. Her left ring finger. Nancy had insisted on buying her the thin silver band with the small sapphire stone. It stood out between her other rings. It ought to, because this one meant the most of all. This one ring meant the promise of a lifetime with the love of her life. Nancy Wheeler had promised to marry her. If someone had told the sophomore Robin that prissy, princess Nancy Wheeler would marry her, she’d have asked if they had just hit their head.
But now she stood in their apartment, twirling her own engagement ring around. It felt like her whole body was buzzing with excitement every single time she saw the blue stone shine in the light.
“Robin, are you ready?” Steve asked from the other side of the door.
“Yeah, I’m coming.”
She rushed out, greeting her best friend in the hallway and rushing down the three flights of stairs that would lead to Steve’s car.
“So, Dustin has been talking my ear off about joining him and the kids for a D&D night and I told him no, but he just won’t hear it. So, he might try to convince you today, just tell him you’re busy or something.”
“Okay.” Robin twirled her ring again.
Steve was tapping his fingers on the steering wheel as he drove. Robin’s attention was drawn to his hands. For the first time Robin wished she had a driver’s license. Maybe then Steve would comment on the ring.
He parked the car in front of his own apartment complex. Dustin and Lucas were already waiting at the front door.
“Robin! Robin! You gotta hear about this new campaign we’re doing…”
---
“Robin?” Nancy pressed the phone tightly against her ear. “I was wondering if you wanted me to pick you up on the way home.”
“Uhm, yeah. I just—” Robin sighed loudly into the phone.
“What’s wrong?”
“It’s stupid.”
“Robin.”
“I really wanted them to comment on the ring. It’s gorgeous, Nance, and I want my friends to see it. I don’t know, I guess I just wanted to talk about it. This is so special, and— I don’t know, it’s stupid.”
“It’s not stupid.” Nancy looked at her own ring. She thought of how exhilarating it had felt to tell El.  Her eyes landed on the table and on El staring at the exit. “I’ll be there in a few, alright?”
---
“I’ll get it.” Dustin jumped up from his spot on the couch and ran to the door. Robin heard him greet the guests. “Come in, come in.”
She looked up, expecting to see her girlfriend walk over to her. But in front of her fiancée walked El with a bright smile.
“Hi, Robin. How are you doing?” El sat down next to Robin.
“I’m great, how are you?”
“Oh, I’m fine.” El dropped her gaze towards Robin’s hands, almost deliberately. “Oh! Is that a new ring?”
“Uhm, yeah, it is actually.”
“Where did you get it? It’s so beautiful.”
Robin smiled brightly. “Nancy, actually got it for me.”
“That is so sweet. Was there a special occasion?” The soft smile on El’s face could only mean she was hiding something, but Robin was so delighted with the attention.
“Actually, yes. I asked her to marry me and after she said yes, she insisted on getting me my own engagement ring. Isn’t that adorable?”
“That is the cutest.”
“Wait, you got engaged?” Steve asked, dropping his magazine.
“You didn’t notice the ring, Steve?” Nancy interjected.
“I—”
“I’m slightly offended. I go out of my way to buy an engagement ring for my fiancée and you don’t even notice.”
“It’s a small ring!”
“Is it?”
“Okay, fine. Robin, will you please tell me everything about your engagement.”
“I’d be delighted to, Steven.” Robin smiled brightly. She quickly mouthed a ‘thank you’ toward Nancy before starting her story.
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wonopia · 4 months ago
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THE PHOTOBOOTH | 005. GROUND RULES
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[WC] . 866 prev ! mlist ! next
it had been several days since misaki and sunghoon started dating.
BOYFIE 🤍 : are you heading here soon?
they were planning on discussing the rules of they’re relationship. which he thought was completely stupid but are going to do anyway because she refuses to date him without any rules, boundaries must be set. which is why she’s meeting up with him at the library to discuss the rules before working on english.
“hey minji,” misaki greeted her, signing in on the sheet of paper. she grinned when she saw sunghoon had already signed in.
“sunghoon went over there,” minji pointed, “how’d you get him to show up?”
misaki shrugged in response before jogging over to the pointed location on the right side of the library.
she stopped in her tracks when she saw two boys sitting across from him. sunghoon’s eyes met hers before smiling widely, even to her it looked genuine.
she immediately walked over to him, smiling at his friends before asking, “is it okay if i borrow him for a second?”
“oh yeah sure.”
“yeah.”
misaki grabbed him by his wrist to take him to an empty aisle so they were hidden by the many books.
she turned to face him before whispering, “we have to study!”
“we can study with my friends,” he smiled.
“no, no, no, no thats not how this works,” she signaled to whatevers going on between them, “we’re dating so no one thinks your weird for being tutored by the ‘no social life princess’, remember?” she reminded him.
his smile dropped at her words, “that’s not what i meant.”
“it doesn’t matter, you already said it. there's no more adding onto whatever this is. we date so i can tutor you without feeling uncomfortable-“
“i’ll feel uncomfortable if you teach me anywhere on campus!”
“that’s so stupid!” misaki groaned, attempting to keep her voice down.
“if you want to tutor me in the library, it can’t look like a one on one.”
“but i’m your ‘girlfriend’” she sighed, “remember our story plot? what’s the point in dating if you don’t want other people to believe it?”
“ugh fine,” he mumbled, “so let’s introduce you to my friends-“
“not today, it’s too soon.”
“fine, meet me in front of the school,” he said, she looked at him confused, “we’ll study at my house.”
“your sister..”
“she’s not home, she’s on the japan trip for a week.”
“oh okay.”
with that she walked out leaving him to go grab his stuff. as she was waiting for him outside of the school, she questioned why she was doing this in the first place. how much did she need this money?
“hey babe,” sunghoon wrapped his arm around her shoulder causing her to look at him.
she brushed off his shoulder, “for starters, number 1 no physical touch.”
“what?” his jaw dropped as they started to walk together on the sidewalk, “i can’t believe you just said that. how would anyone believe that we’re dating?”
“okay fine,” she mumbled, thinking of a way to modify it, “we can hold hands, kiss on various occasions- only when needed, and we can link arms but its a no to holding my waist and below.”
“okay fine,” he nodded, “but we can only study outside of school.”
“sure. rule number two, must post something about each other on our socials but don’t have to hang out at school 24/7,” sunghoon nodded, letting her continue, “number three no asking about my personal life.”
“hey wait a minute, how is anyone gonna believe that?”
she scoffed, “easy just respond with a blunt answer.”
“you're my girlfriend, if anything i should want to talk more about you, but i can’t do that if i don’t know you at all,” he replied.
“that’s the point, you don’t even know me yet you asked to date me.”
“it’s kind of for both of our sakes.”
“right,” she murmured, “before we continue, where are we going? where’d you park?”
“oh i walk to school, i can’t drive but it’s okay i live close enough that i don’t need to take the bus,” misaki thought about what to say but instead stuck to nodding.
“another rule, you must go to my ice skating performances.”
“depends the day-“
“i’m your boyfriend, just make time. you have to give me love and support.. and bring flowers sometimes,” he added on, a smile growing on his face.
“oh i’m sure you’d love my recognition.”
“actually yeah, i would especially since your-“
“since i’m your girlfriend, yeah so i heard,” she joked, cracking a smile as they entered a neighborhood nearby.
they continued to argue about rules and modified a couple to how they liked it. they soon arrived at sunghoon’s house. his house was clean and neat and was very white.
his room was especially cleaner than expected, it was basic but it was livable. they immediately got to work after writing down the list of dating rules. misaki used her black pen while sunghoon used a blue pen.
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"okay but six is so obvious, none of us will fall in love."
"you say that now, sunghoon."
"what's the supposed to mean?"
"that your gonna fall for me."
"yeah sure, in your dreams, choi."
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note: hehe
© wonopia 2024
open TAGLIST . @coffeeprincejaehyun @hoonatic @i03jae
8 notes · View notes
therunawaykind · 3 years ago
Text
Green Eyes - Part III
Pairing: Leigh Shaw x Reader
Word Count: 6.8k
Warnings: Fluff, Angst, mentions of suicide, curses, declarations of love, jealousy, heartbreak.
A/N: First story post this year! This part has been anticipated for quite some time...the request/info by when-wolves-howl was very detailed (I love it keep it coming) hence the length of this part. All that's left to say is I hope you enjoy it. This wasn't meant to be posted till next week but I decided to be nice...something else was gonna get posted today but I changed my mind. You all have that to look forward to next week
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| Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 |
*please do not repost or translate my material or claim as yours. reblogs, comments and likes are always appreciated!*
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After that unexpected meeting of Leigh and Jules, it was quickly decided between the three of you…well realistically two of the three that Leigh would stay with you in this apartment. Jules was just happy to have her own space finally. And well Leigh she was just excited to be around you continuously now, you couldn’t lie you were feeling very excited and giddy to have Leigh around you again but you had to keep up the facade of not caring. After finally packing all of Leigh’s stuff into the boot of your car the last thing you heard from Jules was “good luck with putting up with her 24/7.”
“Jules you’ve seemed to have forgotten I did this every day for 4 years. Which may I add college is much worse cause everyone just goes wild and lets loose.” you nudge Leigh’s shoulder “I’d like to imagine she’s calmed down slightly from all those years ago.” Both Leigh and Jules scoff and roll their eyes. “Yeah good luck with that Y/N/N.”
You glance at the two sisters as you hug Jules and mumble “make sure to keep in contact with us or well…just Leigh on the regular.” You feel her nod subtly as you lean against the car and let the sisters do what they need to. As you purse your lips you walk around and get into the driver's seat and tap against the wheel as you think through everything. You have to leave here eventually, focus on your career again, both you and Leigh get used to the idea of this relationship? Dating? God, that’s another thing you both need to discuss properly. Being in the spotlight…unless you can keep it hidden as long as possible knowing it would be overwhelming for you both. You’re so in your head the door opening and closing didn’t even register until you got punched in your arm “hey singer, where you at? You spaced out on me.”
You laugh at the nickname as you put the key into the ignition “I was just contemplating all the stuff I have waiting for me when we inevitably have to leave here and go back to America.” Leigh stares at you intently and smiles softly “Well if I can be of any help to you for any of those things let me know.” As you stop at a traffic light as you tap the beats against the instrumentals of your music…the music playing was Leigh’s decision. “Well, quite a lot of that stuff has to do with you or well involves you in some way.” as you glance at her quickly you see the worried look on her face “oh God Leigh it’s nothing bad it’s just that we need to have a proper discussion about what this situation between us. Not one that involves us being intoxicated or us hungover, a completely sober discussion. As well as figuring out this whole new dynamic between us and with the added aspect of me being constantly in the spotlight and being watched by fans, paparazzi literally everyone because it’s gonna be a lot and I don’t want it to overwhelm us so soon and ruin our potential.”
Leigh grins as she nods slowly “we’ll figure it out we’re gonna be a power couple roaming the streets. As for you in the spotlight and this new dynamic between us, we’ll get through it and as I said I’ll help in any way I can so it isn’t all on you. Also, I don’t want to ruin our potential either. We’ll be great Y/N.” She places her hand on top of yours and squeezes it tightly. Before you know it you are pulling up to your apartment you turn off the car and turn to Leigh “if you want you can just head in and relax I can carry up the bags and boxes.”
“Have you lost your mind I’m helping it’s my stuff. You haven’t locked me down yet Y/N.” you hear the mischievous giggle as she gets out of the car and you roll your eyes.
//-//-//-//-//-//-//
It had been a few days since Leigh had moved in with you and both of you were figuring out this new dynamic between you again. So far everything was smooth sailing, though Leigh did have days where she was up and down you couldn’t blame her. You were purely just ignoring everything you’d have to deal with when you go back. Today between the both of you decided not to do anything touristy and have a full-blown lazy day. However, you both knew you kept pushing off and ignoring the big elephant in the room between the two of you. That you both agreed had to be discussed and talked about. It could be seen from the corner of your eyes Leigh was fidgeting with either her fingers or rings an activity she did when she was anxious or nervous about something. As for Leigh, she could see your knee bouncing constantly so, of course, she knew you were freaking out. In unison, you both turned and said “we need to get this talk over with.”
You both turn facing each other putting both of your hands out to be able to hold each other somewhat while still being able to see each other's faces. As you start rubbing your thumb over one of her hands she does it on your other hand. You both smile at each other softly as you notice. You clear your throat “okay so we both know this relationship is gonna be very different from everything we’ve ever experienced before. There will be eyes on us a lot of the time but we can try to keep it to ourselves privately for as long as we can if you want. This will be a big step for both of us but I want to make sure we go at your pace so you don’t get overwhelmed.”
Leigh takes a deep breath and squeezes your hands slightly “I understand fully why we are doing this at my pace over everything to do with Matt, every revelation that may be revealed once we fully commit to us as a couple and the guilt that may come with that. But Y/N this is just as new for you as well. This whole celebrity lifestyle, won’t just be me getting these guilty feelings when it comes to our relationship and when it comes to Matt. So yes we will be taking this whole situation slowly but listen to me. It is not just for me it is for you as well. When it comes to my past rather messed up decisions of relationships or even hookups I have felt so guilty thinking that I have been betraying Matt in some way. Which in a sense is ridiculous, but also I felt that hugely with Danny…. But I also think that is due to Danny being Matts brother and me convincing myself that Danny was some sort of link to Matt or just something of the sorts do you get me?”
You nod as your eyes dart all around Leigh’s face taking her in. “I think we both know this won’t be the last discussion in regards to us, maybe it won't be as serious but we’ll have to check in with each other in regards to everything and make sure we’re okay and communicating with each other healthily.” You hear Leigh start laughing to herself you raise your eyebrows at her and wait till she collects herself. “Sorry..sorry I’m just laughing because if you a songwriter who writes lyrics and uses words on the regular can’t communicate properly to me. And me a writer for articles and a column cannot communicate properly to you then we really have no hope in this relationship.” You stare at her mouth agape as the realisation hits you and you slowly start laughing as you sit back on the couch “wow we are doomed if we can’t even talk to each other right. It would be funny if that was our downfall, not being able to talk to each other right.”
Leigh smirks as she places her hand on your cheek and rubs it “we’ll be great we’ll get through this we’re Y/N Y/L/N and Leigh Shaw we got through so much in college. We were the ultimate duo together and now us together as a couple we’re gonna be unstoppable. Actually, it’s gonna be like Y/N Y/L/N and Leigh Shaw power couple alert the ultimate power couple of all power couples.” you can’t help but grin as Leigh continues on rambling on her tangent with her hands moving and waving all over the place. It’s been so long since you’ve seen this Leigh out in the open and it’s only hit you now how much you’ve missed her. God, you can’t wait to write more songs if it is her they are going to be about.
//-//-//-//-//-//-//
It’s been a few weeks since the first initial discussion and everything between Leigh and you has been smooth sailing so far. You haven’t been around each other 24/7 because you didn’t wanna be suffocating each other by being around each other constantly. So while you were doing your own thing of helping out some natives, Leigh would be spending some of her time with Jules to see if she would have any news from Amy on her travels and how Jules was getting on with her family here.
Leigh doesn’t know what possessed her to ask this today but she decided to ask Jules about how the long-distance relationship between her and Tommy was doing. The second Leigh had the question out of her mouth she saw Jules’ face drop and she knew she fucked up. She looks down slightly and purses her lips “okay what happened Jules what went wrong?” Jules couldn’t help but scoff and shake her head at the thought of that relationship. She ran her finger around the rim of her mug “it would be easier to say what didn’t go wrong. Which wasn’t a lot, there were just constant arguments, us well more like her not communicating properly to me.”
“What were the arguments about Jules?”
Jules looks at Leigh hesitant to answer as she fidgets more with anything she can and looks at anywhere but Leigh. “Well uhhh she kept asking me when I was coming back to Los Angeles even though we kind of discussed it before I left that I may not go back depending on if I liked it here.”
Leigh smiles slightly “and let me guess you love it here, you probably prefer it here rather than living back in Los Angeles.” Jules stares at Leigh with her lip between her teeth as she nods hesitantly “is that a bad thing? Do you hate me for it?”
Leigh leans back and shakes her head “Jules it's most certainly not a bad thing, it sure as hell makes a lot of sense that you’d prefer it here after all. Also no it does not make me hate you for it. Does the idea make me a little sad that I won’t be able to see you on the regular? Sure it does totally I mean you’re my little sister for crying out loud. But I get it also means Y/N, mom and I have an excuse and reason to visit Vietnam a lot more often. But from my time here I know, you will find someone else here who will love you so much better and the way Jules Shaw deserves to be loved. And I mean the people here aren’t too bad looking Jules, you have an ocean full of people.”
Leigh hears the slight distaste in Jules’ hum when your name is mentioned. Leigh narrows her eyes and stares Jules down as she wets her bottom lip. Leigh leans forward onto her knees “what’s with the unsatisfactory hum when Y/N’s name came up?” Jules clicks her tongue as she thinks about how to phrase this thing she’s about to say she certainly doesn’t want Leigh to jump to conclusions and blow up. Everyone knows how fast Leigh can blow up and get defensive about someone that is hers. Jules exhales as she runs her hands down her face and she leans against them. “Right Leigh you have to let me say what I’m about to say you can’t blow up at me because I’m about to say something about you, your person and your relationship because frankly, it is just the timing of it all.”
Leigh crosses her arms over her chest and arches her eyebrow as she bites the inside of her cheek staring across at Jules waiting for her to continue.
“It is just I am so jealous of you and Y/N’s relationship what you two have from what I’ve seen these past few weeks…hell scratch that ever since we ran into them. It has been nothing but perfect discussing and actually communicating with each other, spending time away from each other so you aren’t suffocated. Clearly finding out and prioritising each others love languages which seems to be touch for both of you by the way as well as yours being words of affirmation. It is just everything that I want and because of the breakup with Tommy deep down I hate Y/N for being such a perfect partner towards you because that is what I want…what I so desperately want and every relationship I get into falls to pieces. Whereas with you… no offence Leigh you do absolutely nothing and is handed these amazing relationships on a silver platter that goes for both Y/N and Matt. Whilst I am doing nothing but searching for that person….my person. Whilst you’ve found your person twice now.”
Leigh's eyes widen at that statement not what was she expecting at all to come from Jules’ mouth.
“Right okay…that….that was a lot to take in Jules. Give me a minute to just get my bearings. I understand why you are so annoyed and quite jealous about my and Y/N’s situation but I can assure you our situation was and is very different compared to you and Tommy’s situation. And I do really hope you know that Jules because whilst you two were arguing about long distances, moving back to where you realistically really don’t wanna be and not being able to communicate right is infuriating. But with me and Y/N we’re lucky we don’t have the distance but bare in mind I didn’t have any contact with them for however many years. I didn’t hear from them after my wedding, they weren’t there for probably the hardest and most difficult moment in my life. However, I think I prefer that they weren’t there because I don’t think I’d want them to see me in the mess that I was. But now we have a completely different situation Y/N is like a huge celebrity now who is being watched constantly who has fans that would probably die to be in my position right now. But it’s something we’re gonna have to work through together and as long as it’s with them I’m perfectly okay of the hardships we’re gonna be put through. As for the jealousy, I get it the failed relationship after a failed relationship is disheartening. But Jules I’m telling you don’t seek out and search for these people. It will end up as it does with me and end up falling into your hand like a silver platter and it will feel like the nicest and most rewarding thing in your life.”
Leigh scoffs as she thinks back to what Jules said “as for amazing relationships Y/N I can attest for…Matt on the other hand with some of the things Danny told me about Matt and Nina and how they both in a sense fell for each other. So I don’t think that relationship was so amazing. Also, let’s add in the fact I realised on my wedding day after Y/N performing I had feelings for them this whole time. Yet I still stayed married to Matt knowing I loved someone else. So I guess me and Matt are both fucks up in ways. So again no not amazing.” All Leigh knew next was that Jules hurled herself at Leigh for a big sisterly hug and cuddle as she started to cry into Leigh’s shirt finally letting the heartbreak of the breakup out, after hiding it for so long.
//-//-//-//-//-//-//
Today was one of the days that you and Leigh considered a relaxed easy day, which consisted of the longest walk ever or at least some sort of exercise for a long amount of time. Since it was clear just how much Leigh was missing her hiking or exercise classes back in LA. Fortunately for you, Leigh found a small wall to sit on by one of the beaches here. The two of you just enjoying the breeze blowing past the both of you as you had your arm thrown over her shoulder. Her head was resting on your shoulder whilst she quite lazily held the hand that was hanging over her shoulder.
As the both of you were sat in a rather comfortable silence you couldn’t help but space out. Thinking and considering all of the things Leigh was missing at home, hell she was even missing out on her work and you knew she couldn’t stay here much longer. You knew she wouldn’t let you pay for her things she’s too stubborn and would make the argument that it’s money you’ve earned it has nothing to do with her. You knew you had to have the conversation about going back to LA sooner rather than later, it was selfish to keep her here for this long just because you didn’t wanna go back to the celebrity lifestyle. You subconsciously started rubbing your thumb across her hand.
Leigh pats your cheek “you spaced out on me sweetie.” You clear your throat and look down at her as a grin automatically spreads across her face, the sparkle in her eyes as the sunsets. At that moment you were fully entranced by her eyes, you sat back and turned yourself towards her and held out your hand “gimme your phone real quick I wanna take a picture of your eyes.” Leigh looks at you as if you’ve gone crazy “Y/N really?”
“Yeess really you knew and know photography was and is one of my favourite hobbies.” Leigh scoffs and groans acting as if she hates this choice and reluctantly hands you her phone. After a few seconds of fiddling with a few camera settings on her phone, you position her facing the sun as you jump off of the wall. As you place the phone camera right by her eyes to get a good picture, you pause and look at her. “Okay, I’m gonna take a few pictures, just a few of your eyes normally to show just how amazing they are. Then I’ll say something to get that proper goofy, fuzzy smile that I love where your eyes squint so if you ever show people they will know you are truly smiling.” Leigh nods her head at you as she watches your passionate side come out.
After a few minutes of you taking different pictures ever so slightly different you’re onto the goal of getting her squinty eyes. You stand in thought for a few minutes as you look at her “I cannot wait to get back to LA and write so many songs about you, for you and just everything because I absolutely adore you, Leigh. And as much as I know I’m going to be your sounding board when we get back to LA and you go back to work. You are just as much gonna be my sounding board. When it comes to my lyrics and music.” Exactly as you finished you saw a huge grin take over her face.
You couldn’t help but smile at the pictures you were taking, after another few minutes of random things being said between the two of you. You jump back up on the wall beside her and hand Leigh her phone back. As you were focusing back on the waves in the water and just everything about the beach, you completely missed Leigh going through the photos and posting the ones she liked the most on Facebook and her Instagram adoring the fact that you took them, especially even after all these years how good you still were at photography.
Without thinking you grab Leigh’s hand and clear your throat “I know this is probably a discussion that has to be had or maybe this will be a simple easy conversation, but I think it’s time we go back to LA to real-life to reality. I can’t keep avoiding and pretending this celebrity life doesn’t exist and it’ll just leave me alone. And it’s rather selfish me keeping you here when you have your work, friends and just life back in LA.” As you turn to look at Leigh she’s already staring at you with the softest eyes ever as she nods slowly as she looks at the water for a minute. “You’re right we do need to go back and face reality. I do think we’ve been hiding out here long enough. I mean how much longer is it gonna be till someone comes across us here.” You both turn to stare at each other as you rest your foreheads against each other. “Then I guess it’s settled then. Maybe later when we get back we can look at flights but also don’t you have to talk to Jules about it?”
Leigh very subtly shakes her head “nope over the disaster of a breakup with Tommy she’s staying here for a while….God, I don’t even know how long but she wants to try out Vietnam’s love life and see how that works for her. I may or may not have had something to do with that.” Leigh mumbles out the last bit of the sentence, you couldn’t help but laugh at her honesty. “Honestly good for Jules she deserves it and I can see in her that she prefers it here anyway.” Leigh nods as she grins, she grabs your hands as she starts to stand up and pulls you up with her. “Home?”
You grin and nod “home.” As Leigh goes to walk away you pull her back and spin her into you as you place your hands on her cheek and kiss her passionately. Leigh can’t help but melt into you as her arms drape over your shoulders as she hums into the kiss. She’s taken by surprise when you deepen the kiss by nipping at her bottom lip and slipping your tongue into her mouth. Her hands grab onto the back of your top as you both hum at the sensation of the kiss, not really having a kiss like this between the two of you before.
However, whilst the both of you were lost in your haze of lust and love, a tourist…possible paparazzi who hadn’t even seen Leigh’s social media posts had come across the both of you at the beach. Just close enough to make out your face that it was actually you. They couldn’t help but take pictures of the two of you posting it everywhere and anywhere she could, whilst simultaneously sending it to everyone and anyone.
Soon after both you and Leigh had come back to the real world to hear her phone ringing. You both looked at each other trying to get your breath back both furrowing your eyebrows at the sight of Jules’ name on the phone. As Leigh answered the phone Jules could be heard panicking saying “there are pictures of the two of you all over the internet, someone has either found out where Y/N is or they have just randomly come across them. But luckily it’s really only Y/N that can be seen in the picture. Leigh is just a black shadow.” As soon as you hear that your head darts across the open area looking around seeing if there is anyone out in the open as you nibble on your bottom lip. As you finally drag your back to Leigh you see her staring at you softly with a small smile, both basically having a silent conversation with each other as you both nod simultaneously knowing that you have to get home sooner rather than later.
//-//-//-//-//-//-//
Needless to say after that whole ordeal your whole life and being descended into chaos. It got to the stage the second you reached LAX airport it was swarmed with paparazzi outside waiting for you. Once you saw all of them whilst standing with Leigh making sure she got out safely was your first concern. You knew she would be getting home with you so you sent her off with a security guard to bring her to your blacked-out car whilst you dealt with these idiots that have nothing better to do with their lives.
You gave her a quick kiss goodbye as you shoved on your sunglasses and pulled the hoodie over your head. “God I didn’t miss any of this.” as you walk through the exit trying not to get blinded by all the flashes and ignoring all their stupid comments as you walk briskly to your car hoping you whatever God you’d be able to hide Leigh enough so she doesn’t get involved in all of this. When you finally reach the car you basically jump into the car as fast as possible. The second you get in you let out a deep exhale and put your head against the headrest and you hear Leigh chuckle softly. “Home it is time to get us home.”
//-//-//-//-//-//-//
It’s been a few weeks since you’ve come back you had to begrudgingly have to have two separate phones one specifically for work and one for your personal life. You were bad enough responding to people on one phone and now having two was a nightmare. It was your hell, Leigh couldn’t help but laugh at your struggle all you’d hear from her was “you know for someone who is so gifted musically and technologically you suck at this.” The sad thing was you couldn’t disagree you did suck when it came to this aspect of your life. But as promised as you said in Vietnam to each other you were her sounding board and she was yours for this new musical endeavour of yours. Both of you agreed to not raise any more suspicion about Leigh you’d change up your sound a bit for this album. Which she easily agreed to as long as the song was still about her…she didn’t care, so who were you to deny her of that.
Here you both were on a regular occurrence relaxing in your house, Leigh lying back on the sofa listening to the slight changes and twinks you’re making on your music. While at least one of your hands is in contact with some part of her body at all times. Leigh really couldn’t think of a better way to spend her days. You both were slightly stunned when you heard a knock at your door, Leigh stared at you rather bewildered and mouthed “who is it?” You shrug and stare at the door, Leigh watches you as you place your laptop on the coffee table and get up to approach the door. Leigh dashes forward and slaps your arm and whispers “are you an idiot? You can’t just open the door anymore to anyone! Do you actually realise who you are?”
You stare at her mouth agape “what else am I supposed to do I can’t let you answer it if it’s one of those idiots who have nothing better to do with their lives?” Leigh steps back and lets out a breath as she gestures her hand to the door for you. You look at the door again and clear your throat “who is it?”
“It’s Danny…Danny Greer.” Your jaw drops and tense slightly, Leigh looks between you and the door. She knows and is well aware of your dislike of Danny and how you are convinced he still has feelings for Leigh. She is just convinced your crazy there’s no way Danny still likes her…they were so bad for each other. You glance at Leigh at nod your head towards the door as you grab your laptop and walk up to your office to work on your music, however, you weren’t dumb you left the door open to listen to what they were talking about.
Yes okay, maybe you were jealous of Danny and his feelings towards Leigh, you were scared. You were scared because there have been disagreements and arguments between the both of you about your celebrity status due to the fact you both can’t go out and do normal couple things. So yes you were terrified Leigh would realise she could have that normality with Danny even if they were rather bad for each other. As you were typing on your laptop you could hear some mumbles from the two of them talking. All you were hoping for was they wouldn’t get into another argument from the snippets you heard about their last argument it ended with Danny’s fist through a wall and them sitting in a hospital together.
You heard the shrill of Leigh’s voice when she exclaimed “Danny! Oh my God, I cannot believe you. I cannot believe I was calling Y/N stupid and crazy for trying to convince me you still had feelings for me.”
“Leigh it’s true I do love you and you have to know that both Y/N and Matt did and do not deserve you. I have been by your side every step of the way whether you like it or not. Where was Y/N when you needed them most.” that statement can’t help but get Leigh’s breath caught in her throat. Okay, you were gone when she needed you most but she knows you couldn’t stick around seeing her married to somebody else when you loved her. Whilst also getting away from this newfound fame. “Danny yes you were by my side but we were grieving we needed each other to depend and lean on and look where that got us. You slept with your brother’s widow and I slept with my dead husband's brother. We were using each other because in some weird messed up way we reminded each other of Matt. Which made us happy for a little while-”
“You still haven’t answered or told me that you do or do not have feelings for me, Leigh.”
“Oh my God, Danny are you delusional. Of course, I don’t have feelings for you anymore I thought that was clear when I finished whatever I was doing with you and it became even more definite when I took time for myself in Vietnam. Especially now that I have a loving partner right upstairs. That has known me much longer than you ever have or ever will.”
“Right, Right the escape to Vietnam where you ran into Y/N the same Y/N that performed on your wedding day. The same Y/N you didn’t hear from anymore on that day. Funnily enough, also the day where after that performance happened you acted strange and different after that.”
“Danny what’s that supposed to mean it’s not like I knew they were there in Vietnam. I do not know what you are trying to imply but it is ridiculous.”
As you hear Danny about to say something again you get up from your chair and walk down the stairs “Danny I think it’s time you leave.” you continue walking as you approach Leigh and Danny “I think you’ve overstayed your welcome.” You glare at him as he scoffs and shakes his head as he mutters “always the knight in shining armour huh.” you glare at him as you cross your arms over your chest, waiting for him to leave. “This isn’t over Leigh, I’m not finished here, not finished with you.”
Leigh tilts her head and scoffs “we are done here Danny, you had no right showing up here unannounced anyway. Get this into your head. I will never reciprocate any feelings for you anymore. Whatever we had or whatever you think we had is gone, dead and buried.” You see Danny look between the two of you one more time as he leaves through the door.
//-//-//-//-//-//-//
The change between you and Leigh was noticeable since that encounter with Danny. You both hung out just as much if not more. As if trying to portray to each other you both loved each other dearly without having to say anything. But you both secretly knew what was going on inside both of your heads the guilt of having Matt in your mind since that night, albeit your feelings and guilt were totally different from each other it was something you’d both be able to help each other through…if you both just simply talked and communicated healthily like you both said you would all those months ago in Vietnam.
You both felt like you regressed to the worst versions of yourself.
All those days Leigh had away from you she was convinced the best part of her died with Matt, yet when you showed back up in her life you slowly started giving that piece of her back again. That is when it hit her all at once like a truck. Did….did she not love Matt completely and fully. Without her knowing was her love actually split in half between you and Matt. Oh my God was it her fault…was she the cause of Matt’s death…did she make him that unhappy that she drove him to go to that peak of that hike and….NO… no she couldn’t have…right? She needs some way to discuss this with you but… how do you discuss and talk about these things regarding your dead husband with your new partner. God, why did this have to be so difficult.
Why did you have to write that stupid song back in college… why couldn’t you just tell her you liked her in college and we wouldn’t be in this mess. Why did you have to perform it at her wedding and make her realise literally everything. Was what Danny implying right did she subconsciously join Jules in going to Vietnam in hopes of running into you and starting a relationship. Possibly a relationship that should’ve been created years ago. And most importantly why did that fucking song have to get so big, why did it have to make you so famous. God famous and celebrity status don’t even get Leigh started on that.
As if the timing couldn’t be any better in Leigh’s spiral you walk through the door. You throw your keys into the bowl as you automatically say “Hey babe.” Leigh rolls her eyes and tries to keep her scoff as quiet as possible so you wouldn’t hear…but it wasn’t quiet enough. You lean against the counter as you stare at her “what is it Leigh talk to me? We both know our attitudes and actions to each other have changed over the last while and we know since when.”
You notice Leigh scratch at her eyebrow something she does when she’s nervous or about to hate where a conversation is going to lead. She takes a deep inhale “Y/N there are so many things spiralling in my head. I don’t know where to start.” You keep quiet to let her get everything out “I feel guilty about the possibility of me not loving Matt completely and to my full potential. Because it was during your performance when I realised my feelings for you..well not just realised but they came to the front of my mind again. Then it got me thinking about when I left to go to Vietnam did I go with Jules in hopes to find you even though I had no idea where you went. Was me not loving Matt fully the cause of his death did I make him that unhappy he resorted to potentially killing himself. Was I that bad of a wife, I was here so angry at him for crushing on his co-worker Nina when I was doing that exact same thing. I was a hypocrite albeit I only found out when he died but he should’ve been the one yelling and arguing at me not me arguing at him. I have never felt like I betrayed Matt more than I did now. And Y/N don’t even get me started on your famous, celebrity status because we can literally barely do anything. WHY…WHY DIDN’T YOU JUST TELL ME BACK IN COLLEGE OR EVEN JUST SHOW ME THE SONG AND WE WOULDN’T BE IN THIS MESS.”
Leigh takes a deep breath as she tries to calm down “I mean right now these past few months how do I know you are not just in this relationship to be able to write song after song about me and then when we inevitably break up. You STILL get to write songs about me heartbreak songs but still songs about and to do with me!”.
You stare at Leigh wide-eyed as she attempts to get her breath back after her rant. She places her hands on her hips as you run your hand over your mouth and exhale. “Right.” you clear your throat “okay. Leigh, I want you to know you are not the only one dealing with these feelings. The guilt of me performing on your wedding day has been eating at me for so long now. As much as I didn’t wanna basically proclaim my undying love for you through song on your wedding. I could not and I mean could not deny that man of me performing at your wedding no matter who I was to you. He wanted your favourite artist to sing your favourite song. As you two newlyweds danced to the song. I could not deny him of that wish and ask. I feel so bad when I get into this mindset I feel dirty, I feel like I shouldn’t be around you because I basically serenaded you at your wedding-”
you chuckle dryly “I mean really Leigh who does that.” You see a small smirk on Leigh’s face as she mutters a quiet “you. You do that.”
“As for this famous celebrity status…Leigh do you really think I wanted this. I mean… don’t answer that. I know I studied music and songwriting in college, sure I was on the journey to performing and everything. But I never expected it to get to this level. As for you even assuming that I am just with you to make money out of you to write song after song about you is low Leigh. That makes it seem like you don’t know me at all. Would I ever do that to you? Jesus Leigh that is utter insanity, I know you spiral Leigh but this is a whole new level of spiral.”
You take a deep breath as you make sure you’re staring at Leigh for this next statement you’re about to make. “I will say this as many times as you need me to Leigh. I will reassure you however many times you want me to. I am with you because I have loved you since college and that has not wavered all these years. You Leigh Shaw are my muse. You are Y/N Y/L/N’s muse and that will never change. You have me so whipped and wrapped around your finger it isn’t even funny. But this..this discussion or argument we had right here, right now. We need to work on this, us talking and communicating. So we don’t bottle it all up and explode like we just did. We joked about this months ago about how if us two considering our jobs fail at communicating it’ll be ridiculous and we’ll be doomed. But look what just happened to us. We. Need. To. Talk. More. ”
It’s only now you notice the silent tears going down Leigh’s face as she nods and stares at you. This is a Leigh you’ve never seen looking so small and fragile. This must have been tearing her to pieces. You hear the smallest of whispers leave her mouth “can we have a hug or cuddle now, please? I want my Y/N/N back I don’t like these stupid arguments. You can’t help but let out a wet teary chuckle as you nod you lift Leigh up as you walk over to the couch and lie down with her on top of you. Her head is placed on your chest as you rub her back continuously. Leigh kisses your chest at the exact time you kiss the top of her head, as Leigh whispers to not disrupt the calm feeling around the room “I love you Y/N Y/L/N”
You grin against the top of her head. “I love you too Leigh Shaw.”
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skiyoosmi · 4 years ago
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post-break up heartaches
verse 1. in the car that used to drive us to our home
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⤷ kuroo tetsurou, oikawa tooru — more characters coming soon
⤷ verse 2 | verse 3
⤷ play. never let me go by ghostly kisses, forget about us by clinton kane
commissions: open
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⇢ KUROO sighs for the umpteenth time of the day. he was so fucking exhausted and his body's about to give in to sleep any moment now. work has been beating his ass; there was this newbie who kept on messing up the documents needed by the board and for the whole day, he had to be the one to fix said issues. it's not like he wasn't paid enough for that; if anything, his paycheck was one of the most beautiful things he laid his eyes on— but god, even his body has its own limits and yet...
"ya.... yer not supposed to do this anymore. y-ya left me, remember?" you slurred, index finger pointing right at his chest as he circled his arms around your waist, huffing as you practically dropped all your weight on him. here he was, suddenly given the task of having to take you home after your supposed-to-be designated driver, miya fucking atsumu, also drank his brains out with you.
"be patient. still heartbroken because of you, y'know?" kenma softly tells him despite the tipsy feeling lurking in the back of his mind, shaking his head as he looked at you, whose system finally shut down and were now dozing off in the black haired man's arms.
"..... still?" he mumbles, looking down at your figure and he feels his heart contract with pain all over again.
"you can't expect her to be fine immediately, kuroo. it was your wedding day, supposed to be the greatest day of her life and yet it became the worst one... you left her at the altar alone."
he didn't reply anything— or rather, he was unable to. because what can he say to refute the truth? nothing. instead, he proceeded to his car with you still in his hold. he places you on the passenger seat, locking the seatbelts before jogging to the driver's side.
the car ride was calm as you slept soundly with your head occasionally hitting the window lightly as it swayed from side to side. he was sure as hell that if you were sober right now, you wouldn't even have the thought of seeing him cross your mind. he just knows for sure that you despise him with your whole being... at least, that's what he thought until...
"i'm sorry, tetsu. please come back," you whimper in your seat, voice quiet but he heard it nonetheless, "tell me what i did wrong so i can fix it."
the pitiful sounds and mumbles you made struck kuroo right in the heart and which makes him pull over an empty but safe road, just a block away from your (previously shared) apartment. looking over your form, he finds himself reaching out to touch your face, caressing your cheeks as drops of tears fell down slowly on them, "you didn't do anything wrong. you were fine. you were so perfect."
you squint your eyes at him, probably wondering if this was real or just a part of your drunken imagination. nonetheless, you hiccuped, "y-you... you left me and i... i still can't even bring myself to hate you... i just wanna ask you why? i just want to understand."
he thought he also knew the reason why but every single time he thinks about it, he's only led to one conclusion: because he was a coward. no way was this any of your fault— it's definitely not your fault that right at that moment, as he stared at the mirror, wearing the black suit you chose for him, the sudden fear of commitment loomed over him. it's not like it was your fault he suddenly got scared of losing you the way his parents lost each other. but now he thinks it's ironic, because he lost you anyway.
maybe... just maybe, if he had just met you where you stood at the altar, instead of leaving you alone in it, maybe he would've been happier. maybe his days would've started more with a smile from you as you helped him fix his necktie before going to work. maybe, the working hours he spends in the shitty corporate world would've been more worth it if it meant he can come home to you at the end of the day. maybe... maybe he wouldn't have to be stuck with this lump in his throat as he wonders what could've been happening if he just chose to show up and vowed his life to you.
but he didn't.
"i realized i wasn't just ready to tie my life with anyone yet. that's all there is to it, yn."
so with a heavy feeling stuck in his chest and a quiet promise to never see you again for the sake of not hurting you further, he starts the car's engine again, ignoring the words you replied but he was sure they will haunt him for a very long time... again.
i can wait for you no matter how long it takes, tetsu, you know that.
⇢ OIKAWA gives you what seems like a guilty smile as he stands in front of you, opening his arms and gesturing you to come closer. but the stoic expression on your face takes him back to the reality that the last thing you wanted to do today was to actually fetch him from the airport. it just so happens that his three best friends were caught up with work that they had no choice but to send you, the main ex-bestfriend slash ex-girlfriend, to him.
why did you agree when you practically loathe him with your whole being? well, it was probably because you weren't the devil who would reject your friends when they were literally on their knees as they begged you and for some reason, you thought he'll look pitiful going back to his home country after five years with no one to welcome him. yeah, that's it. it's not like you're still in love with him or anything.
"my car's just around the corner," you begrudgingly walk towards the car park with him quietly following. at the moment, he knew better than to get on your nerves or else there would be war. he hates that this happened to the both of you but he can't blame anyone else but himself. because who wouldn't hate their ex-boyfriend if they suddenly broke up with them over a phone call?
tension filled the car as you both sat beside each other. perhaps, this was what other people were talking about when they say that it's impossible for exes to be friends again, to not feel any awkwardness because you were sure as hell that the word "awkward" was an understatement of your situation right now. nevertheless, your eyes couldn't help but wander to his figure as he adjusted his body, opting for a more comfortable position in the passenger's seat.
he looked more youthful and you felt bittersweet— proud that his whole aura screams of "success" which meant that gone were the days where he longed to get that winter cup trophy, nor the times when he overworked himself and put a strain on his knee which led to countless arguments with you. if anything, he looked happier and it sucks because you're not even close to feeling that way... not without him.
"i heard you've finally gotten yourself your own condominium? that's great, yn!" he exclaimed as soon as you began driving to your destination, a hope lit within him that maybe you might just respond to him. just one smile, that's all i need, he thinks.
but you remain focused on your driving, choosing to reply with a single nod and a soft "yeah..."
disappointment fills his heart as he faces the truth that your relationship has really been ruined, along with your friendship. all because he was foolish to think that he couldn't handle the physical distance between you two. realization dawns upon him that he just made that same distance worse as you pull your heart further away from him.
"... i actually bought it for the two of us, you know?" he whips his head to your direction in surprise, heart clenching as he watch you let out a sad chuckle, "i just... i thought it would be nice if we had a place to permanently stay at and for you to have a home to go to when you're at japan. but yeah... i guess things doesn't go our way sometimes, does it?"
"i'm sor—"
"it's okay. i'm fine now," you quickly reply, shaking your head but keeping your eyes on the road. he tries to ignore the tears that start to form in them because he has no right to stop them, knowing full well that he was the one who caused them in the first place.
as if on cue, you halt your vehicle in front of a familiar apartment and much to your dismay, you find yourself looking back in the past when you used to live in that same place, making wonderful memories with the chocolate haired lad with you. you clear your throat to stop the sob that desperately attempts to escape your throat, "uhm... we're here."
"oh, yeah. we're here," he numbly states, already missing you despite the mere inches of space separating the two of you. you just felt so far away and he hates it. but this was the path he chose so he gets out of your car along with his things, turning to you once more, "uhh... thanks for the ride, yn. i know you probably hate me but yeah... it's very nice of you to put that past us and i guess i just want to say sorry for hurting you... i just..."
"i don't hate you, tooru," you softly tell him, "i just don't want anything to do with you anymore. to see you this happy, without me, is like a slap in the face because i'm not. it still hurts and i'm not fine. i just hope this will be the last time we'll see each other. be safe on your trip back to argentina. welcome home."
and with that, you start the car's engine again, no longer having the energy nor the strength to hear his reply. but he wishes you did because as he watches your car drive further away from him, he can't help but wish that he can take back time so that you don't have to go to that condominium and instead, go inside the home you once shared with him.
but i'm not happy, yn. because how could i call this place my home when you're not here with me?
at that moment, unbeknownst to the two hearts that long for each other break at the same time, you finally let out the tears and cries that you've been keeping since you saw him, knowing that no matter how much you try, you'll never be as happy as you were with him— simply because he left you with a hole in your heart that no one else can fill.
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© SKIYOOSMI, 2021. reposting, translating, editing, copying and any kind of plagiarism are strictly prohibited, thank you.
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bookishgalaxies · 2 years ago
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Heya!
I was wondering if I could request a mayfield! Reader x Robin Buckley one shot where they’re at a party and the reader has a little too much to drink, and confesses their feelings for Robin, next day, turns out it wasn’t some drunk mistake, they actually meant it.
Love your stuff lovely! Thanks!
I love this request sm! You are my first request and thank you lots! 💕
The Party, the Punch, the Kiss, the Confession
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pairing: mayfield!reader x robin buckley
general post info: oneshot, not proofread
warnings: drinking, love confessions (is that a warning??), mild cursing, a non-consensual kiss, fighting
summary: you would have never guessed that going to a store reunion party would result in you confessing your feelings for your crush.
a/n: please, I’ve had the biggest crush on Robin even before I knew I was omnisexual and now I get to write fanfic abt her!!!!! I’m in Heaven.
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“Y/n, we have to leave now or we’ll be late!” Max yelled from across the house.
“I know, I know, I’m just putting on this last earring!” You called back, sticking the little pin in your ear.
Walking over to the mirror that hung on your door you examined yourself. Everything seemed to look good. You were in a casual summer outfit, and you had put on a smidgen of makeup.
You sprayed one spritz of your favorite perfume, grabbed your bag, then headed out of your room, closing the door behind you.
Walking out into the living room you saw your sister waiting by the front door impatiently. She saw you a burst out laughing.
“What is it this time?” You asked
“Your seriously wearing makeup.” She snorted
“Yes, yes I am.” You replied
“We aren’t going to prom, just to Steve and Robin’s stupid store party.” Your sister Max said, opening the door and heading out to the car.
“Funny, you were the one who begged me to drive you.” You called, closing the front door and locking it.
“I didn’t want to skateboard across town.” She said as you both got into the car.
Starting the car, the radio blasted Kate Bush’s Running Up That Hill. You turned it down a bit, but kept it at a decent volume. If there was one thing you and your sister agreed on, it was the best type of music and how loud it needed to be blared.
“Why are you all dolled up anyways?” She asked, turning the dial to lower the volume on the radio a tad.
“I’m not. I wear makeup on a daily basis.” You stated.
“Okay, yeah, but you never wear makeup, perfume, and jewelry. It’s always one of the three.” Max said.
“Well, it’s none of your business.” You quipped
“It’s because of Robin isn’t it.” She teased
You where silent for a second, then asked
“What do you mean?” You asked
“Oh come on Y/n, I see how you glance at her when she’s not looking. Oh, and how you laugh at every single one of her shitty jokes.” Max said
“I don’t know what you are talking about.” You reply
“Hey, I totally support you, I mean, you are my sister so I kind of have to, but still, it’s kinda cool. “ she admitted
“Did you just say I’m cool?” You inquired, a fake gasp coming after your statement.
“I said the fact that you like girls was cool, not you.” She corrected.
“Geez, okay.” You said
“You asked.” Max mumbled.
“Fair.“ You admitted
“She likes you too you know.” Max stated
“What?” You blurted out
“She likes you too?” Max said, annunciating every syllable.
“Liar.” You said
“I heard her talking you Steve about a girl with beautiful (y/e/c) eyes that she liked.” Max layed out her evidence.
“And?” You questioned
“And, I heard her say the girl she likes always laughs at her jokes.” Max added on.
“That still doesn’t mean it’s me!” You laughed, even though here was no joke.
“You. Are. So. Oblivious. You’re the only girl Robin knows that has (y/e/c) eyes and laughs at all her jokes.” Max stated
“I’m sure plenty of girls laugh at her jokes, they’re hilarious.” You defended.
“Her jokes are shit.” Max replied
“They are not!” You exclaimed
“See, you are the only person that thinks that.” Max says
“Well, whatever, it doesn’t even matter.” You said dismissively.
Max gave you a side glance, rolled her eyes, then turned the radio back up.
You two arrived at the VHS store 10 year anniversary party just as Max’s friend’s rose up on their bikes. Your sister hopped out of the car and walked over to the group of boy plus Hopper’s daughter.
You got out of the car and locked the door. Observing the cheap decorations put up outside for the store’s 10 year anniversary.
Walking inside, you noticed the place wasn’t crowded but there was a handful of people. The owner of the shop was working the register and a few other employees were helping some costumers. You looked around for Steve and Robin and saw them in the back next to a table of snacks.
You made a beeline for the food, giving them a quick wave then grabbing a bag of chips and opening it.
“Ya see, I can’t pull any girls if we are next to the snack table. We all know women have one true love, food.” Steve complained, gesturing to you.
“Have you considered that maybe you need to up your game?” You asked, joining standing beside them.
“Have you considered that maybe I tried that.” He said to you.
“The other day I saw him trying to quote Shakespeare to a girl.” Robin told you, a small smile on your face.
You laughed a genuine laugh. Breathing in a gasp of air after you where done. Your nose was filled with Robin’s flower scented perfume. You wanted to breath in again just to smell the sweet smell again, but you realized that might have been weird.
“Stevie, I thought we went over how weird it is quoting a 16 year old boy who killed himself for a 13 year old girl.” You teased him
“Hey, at least that kid got the girl, that’s more than I’ve done in the past 7 months.” He said.
You snorted.
“Y/n, are you wearing lipstick?” Robin asked, turning to face you fully.
“Yes, I, Y/n L/n am wearing lipstick, the horror.” You deadpanned.
“It looks nice on you.” Robin commented
Steve made a fake puking noise.
“Get a room.” He said
“It was one compliment.” Robin stated.
“He’s just bitter because a girl hasn’t told him his hair looks nice today.” You joked
Robin laughed and your ears were filled with the most melodic sound.
“What is today? Make fun of Steve day?” Steve asked
“Nope, that’s everyday.” Dustin said, cutting in.
“Not these little shits, who invited them?” Steve groaned.
“Hey, I thought we were best bro’s?” Dustin asked, a fake hint of offense coming from his voice
“Just because we saved the world twice together doesn’t mean we are best bro’s.” Steve explained.
“I think that’s exactly what that means.“ You agree with Dustin.
-☾❣︎☽-
As the night progresses you move around throughout the store. Talking with other movie lovers who have been coming to this place since it opened. You liked hearing them talk about their favorite movies and why they were so drawn to them. You shared your love for movies as well to others, and even made friends with an older lady who was sisters with one of your favorite actresses. To top it all off the fruit punch they had out was the best fruit punch you had ever tasted. There was something different about it that you couldn’t quite describe, but whatever it was, it was delicious.
Look at the new releases at the front of the store, you scanned for the new movie you had been waiting to come out on tape. Suddenly you heard footsteps from behind you, then an unfamiliar spoke.
“Haven’t seen you around here.”
You turned around and where met with the gaze of a guy. You wouldn’t call him a man, neither a boy. He looked to be about 18 and was wearing a leather men jacket from the local high school. You had seen him before, he was the captain of the basketball team.
“Oh, yeah, I don’t get out much.” You joked.
“Jason.” he said, holding out his hand.
“Y/n.” You said, you didn’t shake his hand. You didn’t like how close he was standing to you.
“You like movies?” He asked you, stepping even closer
“Uh….yeah…you could say that.” You replied, feeling very uncomfortable. You wanted to step back, but the New Releases display was behind you, blocking your path.
“What do you say we watch one together sometime, Y/n.” Jason, the guy, proposed, only inches away from your face.
You had to refrain yourself from cringing. At both his bad breath and his horrible flirting skills.
“I’m okay, you know, I think I’m gonna go-“ You were cut off
Jason grabbed your face, and kissed you. To be honest, your brain malfunctioned. Your head was already cloudy and not working right, but now some random dude kissed you, without asking? What the hell was going on. In those few seconds you felt so overwhelmed. You tried to pull away but he had a strong grip on you. It was barely 25 seconds before something happened, but those 25 seconds felt like forever. His cologne. Was too strong, his fingers digging into your cheek and your arm hurt, a lot.
“Hey asshole, get your hands off of her.” Robin yelled, shoving Jason out of the way.
He got knocked to the ground, but the look on his face was furious.
“I don’t hit girls but-“ He was cut off by Steve throwing a punch down at his face, his head hit the floor with a loud thump.
“Y/n, are you okay?” Robin asked tentatively, looking at you with concern in her eyes.
You didn’t know how to respond, or what to do, so against your best wishes, you felt tears start to pour out of your eyes. Robin gripped your hand gently and led you to the back room of the store, closing the door behind you two and turning on the light.
“I’m so sorry he did that Y/n, I didn’t even know that shithead was here.” Robin apologized, looking upset.
“I-it’s okay, n-n-not your fault.” You spluttered out
“Hey, would it help if I gave you a hug?” She asked, her voice calm and gentle.
“S-sure.” You mumbled.
She embraced you and you had never felt more comforted in your life. You felt your heart starting to slow down, and your tears stopped. She held you for a few minutes, rubbing circles on your back and telling you it was going to be alright.
You both pulled away and she looked at you. Your eyes met, and you wanted to believe there was love in her’s, but you were drunk, what did you know. Your thoughts raced, there where so many things you wanted to say.
“I want to kiss you.” You blurted out, instantly you regretted it. Crap, crap, crap, that damn punch!
“E-excuse me?” Robin stuttered
You sighed, it was already out there, there was no denying it.
“Robin, I like you, like a lot.” You confessed.
“Yeah, as a friend.” She laughed, it sounded a bit bitter though.
“No, as a potential girlfriend.” You corrected.
“You’re drunk.” She said sadly.
“No, I’m in love, with you.” You said
“Y/n, let’s get you home. You’ve had a little too much punch.” She said, shaking her head, taking your hand, and heading leading you out to your car.
-☾❣︎☽-
You woke in the morning to the bright sunlight pouring in your window. The headache you had was worse than anything you had ever felt before. You groaned, and cursed the sun for being so bright. As if all at once, pieces of memories came back when you thought of what you did last night that would cause such a headache.Solid coherent thoughts of events the last night where slipping through your hands faster than water. Oh shit, you had to call Robin, now.
You got up, a little light headed at first, but that didn’t matter. You raced to your house phone and as quick as you could with a horrible hangover dialed her number. One ring, two rings, three rings, she wasn’t going to answer.
“Hello?” You hear a familiar voice say.
“Robin.” You said, letting out a sigh of relief.
“Y/n.” She replied
“What happened last night? I remember but and pieces, but it’s all so foggy.” You asked
There was a long pause before she said.
“You had a little too much punch, some asshole kissed you, and I brought you home.” She summarized.
“Did I say anything stupid while I was drunk?” You asked, hoping what you thought might have happened happened last night.
“You, well, you said something to me, but it’s not a big deal.@ Robin mumbles out an answer.
Oh shit
“What did I say?” You questioned, your worse fear only moments away from coming true.
There was a long pause, gosh it felt like eternity.
“Yousaidyouwereinlovewithme.” Robin blurted out too quickly for you to understand
“Huh?” You asked, needing her to repeat herself.
“Y-you….said you were uhm….inlovewithme, but you were drunk so it doesn’t even matter. Besides, I mean, you probably have a boyfriend or have another guy on your mind who you just Whalen’s told m-.” You cut her off, not letting her finish her rambling.
“Robin, I don’t know about love just yet, but I do like you, a lot.” You told her, a soft smile on your face.
“You mean like, as a best friend?“ She inquired quickly, you almost didn’t catch her words.
“No, I mean as like, a potential girlfriend.” You corrected.
“Oh.” She breathed out.
“I hope this doesn’t mess up our friendship.” You say after a few seconds.
“I like you too Y/n, like a lot.” Robin said calmly.
“Really?” You asked
“Yeah. I mean, for starters you’re beautiful, funny, and you actually laugh at my jokes.” She said
“Does this mean that we’re, dating?” You asked
“Do you wanna be my girlfriend?” Robin asked you
“Of course.” You replied.
“Then I yes, this means we are dating.” Robin stated.
“Steve’s gonna flip when he finds out you pulled a girl before he did.” You joked
“Oh my gosh he will, I have to tell him. We should all meet up and see that movie you’ve been talking about for the past few weeks. Would 7 work?” She rambled off the proposal.
“7 would be great.” You said
“It’s a date!” She exclaimed, and hung up the phone.
—————-🌖🌗🌘🌑🌒🌓🌔—————
I’m too tired to add tags, that sounds like a morning me problem lolz.
Thanks to all for reading.
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yoonpobs · 4 years ago
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bad boy good thing v.
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pairing: jeon jungkook x oc
genre: angst, smut, fluff, miscommunication (we hate her lol), pining
warnings: smut, jungkook is really an asshole, the angst hurts a lot tbh, unhealthy relationships (?)
words: 2, 435
summary: a series of drabbles where you're confused and jungkook's confusing
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a glimpse into the past
“Yes. I’ve literally just stepped foot into my apartment.” Jungkook huffs with his phone between his ears and his shoulders as he attempts to multitask, hands moving a box of the dining table.
But Jimin is persistent and he’s yapping his ear off, something about dropping by in a few but Jungkook is barely paying attention, not when the existential crisis of no longer being a high school student that could hide under an institution with a false sense of security. College was different. He was on his own, even with the presence of his friends; and Jungkook was both terrified and excited.
He’d always dream of the start of his college life. Jungkook was a bit of a dreamer, and he aimed to live out the best life possible; all while trying to juggle his academics and do some extracurriculars on the side. When he told Taehyung about his ambitions, his friend just blinked and him and offered a snort; with an almost taunting pat on his shoulder.
You’ll see.
Jungkook didn’t know what he meant then, and he can only wait to find out.
“Do you need help moving in? Tae and I just finished a lecture and we’ve got the rest of the day off.” Jimin asks over the phone, and while Jungkook wants to start off his journey being independent; there were boxes of his belongings that looked way too unappealing to deal with alone.
“You’d to that?” Jungkook sighs, eyebrows furrowing when he searches for the box that goes into his bedroom.
“Come on, Kook.” Jimin whines, “You think your own hyungs won’t help you out?” His jibe is lighthearted, which only makes Jungkook roll his eyes at his friends' words.
“I know.” Jungkook affirms, “Just college life, you know? Thought you’d be busy having your third existential crisis of the week to help out.”
Jimin snorts over the line, “Try this day, kid.”
Jungkook chuckles, and mumbles something under his breath before puffing; grabbing his phone with his hand as he thinks of a question he’s meant to ask for a while, ever since he stepped foot onto campus and his accommodation.
“Is ____ with you?” Jungkook asks.
Jungkook did so some growing in the time after you’d graduated, and he supposes that he relied a little too much on you as well as Jimin and Taehyung growing up in high school. Because once the three of you graduated, Jungkook was essentially left to fend for himself when you no longer were able to pick him up with a call away or help him out with difficult math problems when you had college to worry about.
It was horrible at first, purely because Jungkook missed you and your kindness. Sure, phone calls and texts worked—but your presence was always more than what words could ever offer, and Jungkook found himself searching for other methods to survive the next two years in high school without you there looking over him.
His football teammates had always been just his football teammates until he was forced to fraternise with them on a deeper level, and he realised that they weren’t too bad. They were fun and full of life, definitely the type of people that he found himself having fun with. He’s always been surrounded with people that were older than him, you, Jimin and Taehyung for example—and having peers his age to hang out with was a pandora box he never knew he’d ever get used to.
Take Eunwoo for example. Jungkook was petrified of him because there was no way a sixteen-year-old could look that could, and if he looked like that before puberty finished its course—then what the hell was he going to look like after?
But he was a nice guy, a fun person to hang out with and he definitely taught Jungkook some things he’d never dare ask Jimin or Taehyung. Things about women and men; the interrelationships that could be navigated with enough practice.
And enter Yuna, the first girl he’s ever had the ability to get to know in his life besides you. It was the typical cheerleader-meets-footballer trope that Jungkook would always scoff at, but according to Eunwoo “it’s only right that the same type of people minded together.”
Jungkook furrowed his brows when Eunwoo clasped him on his back when he told him that with a wink, suggestive eyes when he exposed a not-so-secret that Yuna had on Jungkook after one of their football games during his senior year.
But Jungkook thought otherwise, probably because he remembered you telling him that people were fundamentally different and social interactions with different walks of life only made life more beautiful and worth living. Seeing the diversity in cultures and experiences opens up our hearts to a world that doesn’t exist for us—it keeps us humble.
Jungkook blindly agreed then, likely entranced with you in general to consider the weight of your words. But Eunwoo was like a constant reminder, and he was older then—a little more subdued enough to pay attention to the words of his friend.
And when Jungkook continued his high school life, it seemed like more and more people seemed to pay attention to him. It wasn’t like he was unpopular before, he definitely caught the eyes of many—but it was different then. It was like Jungkook was his own person and people thought he was cool enough to approach.
So when Yuna shyly asked him out for a date, Jungkook said yes even though he still thought of you.
And when Eunwoo slapped a pack of condoms into his palm while his other football teammates hollered, Jungkook took the leap of faith and lost his virginity the same night.
So, yeah. Jungkook did some growing up—and he hopes that it’ll be enough for you to see him as a man.
“—she’s always doing so much that she barely has time for us and I get that she’s always been an overachiever but we miss her, you know?” Jimin complains, and Jungkook just about returns back from his flashback.
“Sorry, what did you say?” Jungkook says sheepishly.
“Were you not listening to me rant for the past five minutes?” Jimin exasperates and Jungkook hears some shuffling and a chuckle, possibly coming from Taehyung, on the other end of the line.
“You do have the tendency to go off tangent, Jimin,” Jungkook mutters.
Jimin scoffs, “It’s called paying attention to the details you brat. But anyway, to sum it up for you since you wanna be annoying—_____ isn’t with us. She’s got this student council thing and a meeting with a bunch of ambassadors visiting the campus in the evening.”
Jungkook blinks, taking a moment to process the information. He smiles fondly to himself, realising that you always did fine on your own—and he supposes it’s always been that way. You were quiet and never imposing, but you still did your best.
“Oh.” Jungkook says, “Will I be able to see her soon?”
Jimin snorts on the other end.
“Why are you asking me? You have her number right?” Jimin retorts, “Though it may be difficult reaching her cause she takes like five business days to reply if you aren’t work-related.”
Jungkook chuckles while he fiddles with his thumb. He can see you working hard, eyebrows furrowed as you type out emails and organise events like the efficient woman you were.
He’s seen pictures of you on social media, courtesy of Jimin and Taehyung who’d post stories of your pouts when they’d drag you out for some social time, according to their captions. And God, did you grow up even more beautiful than you were in high school.
Jungkook saw you as the girl he admired in high school and it was mostly his puppy-loved up brain thinking of you like this super smart and out of his reach senior that he wanted to respect. But now that Jungkook was … older. He still thinks you’re admirable and smart, but he can’t lie and say he didn’t notice other things.
Like how certain tops flatter your collarbones so nicely that he wonders what it’s like to sink his teeth into them. Or how you’ve experimented with tennis skirts that look like easy access for a territory Jungkook’s used as one of many of his spank bank materials. Even the way your eyes innocently glance up in pictures makes Jungkook’s brain hazy.
Jungkook was older, and so were you. The two of you were in college and it was different. You weren’t just his high school senior and he wasn’t just the little kid that worshipped you. It was free game and Jungkook wanted to make to most out of it.
“I will.” Jungkook nods with a declaration and a sense of determination in his chest. “What time does she finish?”
A brief moment of silence until Jimin responds, snorting to himself.
“She usually gets off her meetings at—10 pm?” Jimin ponders out loud. “You’re really going to wait for her?”
Jungkook wants to add he’s been doing that all this while, but keeps it to himself.
“Just can’t wait to see her.” He shrugs casually.
“You still have that schoolboy crush on her?” Jimin teases. But Jungkook doesn’t flush this time. He’s had his handful of experiences to navigate his way with feelings and desire.
“Not a crush.” Jungkook rolls his eyes. But he wasn’t going to admit that to Jimin or Taehyung just yet. “Is it bad to want to see an old friend?”
“Whatever you say, Jungkook.” Jimin sing-songs. “But I will warn you; _____ isn’t the type.”
At this, Jungkook furrows his eyebrows.
“What?”
Jimin sighs, “Whatever it is you’re thinking … stop.” And his words oddly set off an uneasy feeling in Jungkook’s chest that he doesn’t like. “You know _____. She’s not the kind of person that dates or fucks around. I don’t think she’s even looked at any guy on campus ever since we were enrolled two years ago.”
Jungkook rolls his eyes, feeling slightly ashamed that he’s been caught so early on. But along with growing up, Jungkook’s grown quite a bit of an ego too.
“What makes you think I want to fuck her? What if I really just miss her?” Jungkook snaps.
“Kook, I love you and you’re my best friend but I’ve seen your Instagram stories and escapades. I have no problem with you being sexually active or whatever—you do you, as long as it’s consensual and within respectable boundaries. I know you think college is like this unobstructed territory where you can just fuck around with people but _____ really isn’t like that. I’ve been there and I’m telling you to drop it.”
Jungkook clenches his jaw, “You’ve wanted to fuck her?” Jungkook accuses.
He can practically hear and feel Jimin’s eye roll over the phone.
“No, you idiot.” Jimin sighs, “I’ve had the same intentions as you with other women. While they may be receiving and comfortable with that, _____ won’t be. I hear and recognise your tone and I’m warning you against it.”
Jungkook purses his lips, wanting to defend himself further. But he realises, who is Jimin to tell him what to do with his life? He isn’t a kid anymore.
“You’re reaching.” Jungkook tells Jimin, “You don’t have to worry okay? I just miss ____ and I want to see her before orientation on Friday. Is that a crime?”
“Again, I don’t know what you really want so I won’t project anymore. But I’m telling you, ______ is _____. You don’t think dudes have tried with her before?”
Somehow the revelation of the fact that you did have two years to mingle around with other people and potentially get with men (or women) that weren’t him causes a different type of dread to fill his stomach, an ugly emotion of jealousy. One that he’s never felt before and he doesn’t like it at all.
“God, I haven’t even seen you yet and you’re already micromanaging my entire life.” Jungkook scowls.
“The double standard is real.” Jimin scoffs, “You used to follow _____ around like a lost puppy when we knew each other first? I feel betrayed, man.” Jimin is joking but the reminder makes Jungkook still.
"That's ... different." Jungkook protests.
Jimin snorts as if he doesn't believe his friend.
"Oh, it is different all right. You, my friend, are whipped." He snickers, "Too bad the two of you are basically polar opposites, huh?"
Jungkook freezes on the other end when Jimin casually lets it slip the thought that somewhat plagues his mind, too.
"We're not that different." Jungkook defends himself.
"Says you Mr Athlete all throughout high school. I bet you ten bucks that you were already recruited by one of the football dudes here."
Jungkook scowls because Jimin was spot on.
"Okay. I do sports and she doesn't. That's it." Jungkook snaps.
Jimin clicks his tongue, "You're all for the attention, dude. _____ always keeps it on the down-low while you do your best when people are cheering you on. It's like the spotlight follows you wherever you go and she does her best avoiding it."
Jimin clenches his jaw because while Jimin's words were lighthearted, and he knew better than to ever put you down because the three of you were all good friends—the fact that someone as close to the two of you as Jimin; was laying out the obvious makes Jungkook doubt himself a lot more.
"Oh, and you're the best at psychoanalysing people right?" Jungkook sneers.
Jimin snickers on the other end but Jungkook can't find it in himself to laugh.
"Relax. I'm joking, all right?" Jimin reassures his friend. "You don't even like her that way, right? That's what you said anyway."
Right. He didn't. That's what he told Jimin.
"Right," Jungkook says stiffly.
"If the two of you ever ended up together, though ..." It's as if Jimin was the one dead-set on pushing for it as Jungkook wishes for him to drop it. "Nah. It wouldn't happen. It probably wouldn't work out either."
Jungkook forces a dry chuckle before muttering a lame excuse and hanging up.
He loved Jimin, the guy was a good friend on an average day and an absolute sweetheart on better ones. And Jungkook knew that Jimin meant no malice when he spoke of the potential relationship between you and Jungkook because, well ... Jungkook has always been the younger guy. And that would be weird, wouldn't it?
But Jungkook knows he's done some growing up. And he'll prove it—in whatever way possible.
Jimin doesn’t need to know.
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hobbitsnapes · 3 years ago
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YOU GUYS ARE DATING
Corpse x MGK!sister reader
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(Found this image on Pinterest so all credit goes to artist, if you know who it is please comment below so I can credit them)
A/N: this was requested by @heyitssab
Tree is tall of sex in this, but it’s more in a joking matter, plus corpse has stated he doesn’t mind as long as you are not a minor or send or tag him. I’m literally 2 years younger than him, and have no intentions of ever tagging him or sending him any of my work XD
Summary: how many idiots does it take to tell the brother and friend they’re dating? Apparently takes 2 very forgetful people, who kept their relationship secret without knowing it.
It had just been by chance, a small chance that he had been scrolling through his tags. liking and reposting art, when he saw a tag from someone he followed. He wrecked his brain for when he had followed her, coming up empty. She was cute, no denying the beauty she had as she laughed in the video. It was a clip from a stream that he didn’t know she had, as he couldn’t even remember her name, wearing his merch as it fit her snug. It fit her perfectly in fact, the large hood covering her face, hiding the flush to her face from her rather large chuckles that left her body. He couldn’t help but like the photo, and he couldn’t help but to press message either.
It was first only small likes to posts, an Occasional message, and a view on their livestreams, but that all changed when he spoke of the song he was working on with her older brother.
It all started that night, when both lay in their beds as they talked, laughed, and felt their hearts flutter each time they heard one another speak.
Her phone rang violently in her bag, nearly making her drop the to go bag all over the ground as she walked. “Hello?” She asked, as she held both bags with her hands as her shoulder gripped the phone as if it’d fall down a cliff. “Hey bug!” He exclaimed, making her chuckle as she heard the booming sound of his voice. She had always detested the nickname, as he gave it to her as kids due to her horrendous fear of the creatures. But, it brought more joy to her, as it reminded her of their youth. Having been adults for years, it was fun to hear such a childish name that’s stuck.
“Hey mopey.” She chuckled, as that was the name she gave him when he was in his emo phase that he never outgrew.
Both talked as she walked towards the elevator, mainly about how his day had gone as she silently listened.
She had always been this way, always the shyer of the two, the one to listen to others first before she said a word. He had teased her for it most of their childhood and teen life, but he had grown to love it, as he could let loose or rant to her about anything, and he knew she’d be there just to listen to him.
“So what’re you doing right now?” He asked, as she got into the elevator. “Just grabbed some dinner a few minutes before you called and nearly made me shit.” A smile painted on her face at his boisterous laughter.
“Are you at home?” He asked, as he heard the sound of the elevator beeping in the background. “No, I’m spending the night with my boyfriend.”
She had mentioned about a month prior that she was seeing someone, the joy it brought him to hear the excitement and joy in her tone as she gushed about their first date.
If this was 7 or 8 years prior, he would be bombarding her with questions about the man, who he was, where he lived, where he could meet him to find his intentions with his baby sister. But, in the last few years, he found himself feeling calmer whenever she’d mentioned her love life. He knew she was smart, and would never date a man who treated her poorly. The few breakups she had, they always ended amicably, her head still high as she told him. So, he never asked her any questions about the man, as he could tell from the few times she mentioned him, he could feel the love this man had for her, and Vice versa.
The strong barreling of her phone alerted them awake, both groaning out as she reached for her phone without lifting her head from his shoulder. “Hello?” She mumbled, voice slurred as the saliva was thick in her mouth, barely awake as she fought to listen in on who dares to wake them up.
“Hey!” He exclaimed, making her equally exhausted lover groan. She shifted off of him, laying on her back as he turned away from her, as to hopefully shut his eyes and fall back asleep. She was used to her brother's large voice, as it hardly phased her after growing up with him. “Colson, why are you calling me this ungodly hour?” “Oh come on, it’s not that early.” “Col its-“ She pulled her phone from her ear, eyes shutting violently as the bright light blinded her “5 o’clock in the morning. So again, I’m going to ask you, why did you call me at the asscrack of dawn?” “You don’t remember?” He asked, making her irritation grow. “No, that’s why I’m asking.” She says, as she rubbed her sleep crusted eyes. “You were coming up today to hang out with casie, remember?” Her hand stopped rubbing her face, as she felt her heart stop momentarily. “Wait, you mean today? I thought I was coming Friday?” “No, both of you settled on today, remember I told you that’s perfect because I have a day off?” She felt her heart pain as she heard the sadness in his tone, knowing he’s expecting her to bail. “Yeah sorry, I thought you meant Friday so I mixed it up, let me get ready and I’ll be out the door okay? Love you” she said, as she hung up the line.
Before she could even move, she felt his arm wrap around her body. A tired groan leaving his lips. “Nooo stayyyy.” He groaned, pulling her body to his. She smiled as she looked down at him, wrapping her arm on his chest and the other behind his neck. “I wish I could live, but I can’t.” Planting a soft kiss against his lips. “Stay in bed for a few more hours, please?” Her heart pulled at his tone, hearing just how tired he was. “I can’t, casies wanted me to come up for weeks now. And it takes a good 3 hours to get there. I wanna spend as much time as I can with them before it gets dark so I can get back safely.” He groaned at this, wrapping his arms around her. “Yeah but it’s only 5, it wouldn’t be safe to drive since we went to bed like, 2 hours ago.” “Yeah, and whos fault was that mister?” She teased, “hmm, sorry but I just couldn’t keep my hands to myself after not seeing you for a few days.” He mused, pulling her body closer to his, planting his lips against hers. A small hum left her lips as he pulled her thigh over his, grabbing the flesh harshly as their lips cascaded together. “Mm, no no no, you’re not gonna convince me to stay here just to go another round.” She said, as she got off from his warm body, throwing his large hoodie over her bare body. “Oh come on babe, are you sure about that?” He said, making her turn around to him. A small gasp left her lips as her eyes took in his milky white complexion. His honey brown eyes looking back at her with a small smile etched onto his face. His hair a tousled mess that resembled a bird's nest, some pieces falling onto his face. “Honey, I’ve been wanting to see my family for weeks now, I see you almost everyday and practically live here. I’ll be back tomorrow so I can grab more clothes from my place okay?” She placed a kiss to his lips, both holding one another in their arms. “I don’t know why you don’t just say fuck that place and just move in.” He mumbled, making her chuckle and heart warm. “Don't you think it’s a little soon though? I mean we’ve only been together a few months love.” “Yeah, but you’ve practically lived here since we got together, you literally just go there to get more clothes that you end up leaving here.” She looked into his eyes as she thought about his words. “Hm, I’ll think about it today okay?” She mused, planting a kiss to his lips. A soft okay leaving him as she got up.
“And babe, remember if you live here, we can have all the sex we want and not have to worry about driving to get one another.” He exclaimed, laughing at the loud honey she screamed from the bathroom.
She couldn’t help but laugh out as she watched, as her niece tried her hardest to braid her fathers grown out hair. It was near impossible not to, as pieces would fall out, resulting in her pulling them harsher, nearly pulling his eyelids back due to the tension from his temples. “Okay okay you’re gonna fuckin scalp me.” He chuckled , as all three bursted out in large laughter.
“So how’s school going this year?” She asked her, as she delicately painted her nails. Both of the girls had found themselves on the floor in front of the nice coffee table, as colson sat and chatted with them. “It’s going really well.” “Oh yeah? Make any new friends?” She teased. “I mean, kinda.” She couldn’t help but hear the wavering in her tone, spotting the faint blush dusting her skin. “Ohh, so there’s a someone eh?” She teased to her, making the preteen hide her face as to conceal the flush. “His names Garrett, and we both take social studies together. He always sits next to me at lunch, and we’ll draw on my notebook.” She gushed, making her smile. “Soo, do you think he likes you?” “I mean, that’s what everyone keeps saying.” “Yeah well don’t worry about it to much cas, you’re not dating anyone for many more years. You’re still a kid.” Her das said, making the young girls face fall.
Y/N knew he was only saying this to protect her, as he said the same thing to her growing up. “Hey, don’t be bummed out about it. He is right, you both are only 12 and should focus on school. But don’t worry, he’ll come around. He was just like that with me up until my current boyfriend.” She whispered, making the young girl chuckle.
“Speaking of which, how are you guys doing?” He asked, as she hadn’t mentioned hun to her in a while. He didn’t think it’d hurt to ask. “Great actually, we’re thinking of moving in together actually.” “That’s great! I’m really happy that y’all met.” “Yeah, I am too.” She hummed, a flush dusting her cheeks.
Both men laughed as they chatted on the phone, talking about anything that would come to mind. What was once only a collaboration for a song, turned into an amazing friendship that caused both of them to call at late hours just to shoot the shit.
A yawn left his lips, as he listened to colson ramble on about another song he was making. “Woah, you tired man?” Colson asked, shocked to hear the sound. “Yeah sorry, was up most of the night last night.” He mumbled, rubbing his eyes. “Were you feeling alright?” He asked, worry laced in his tone. He knew all about his friends illnesses, even once being on the other end of the phone during a bad spell one day.” “Oh yeah yeah yeah, was just, up with the misses last night.” He chuckled, a flush blooming on his cheeks. “Ohhh yeah? And how was it?” This shocked him, nearly feeling his heart stop. Like, does he usually know about his sisters sex life? He didn’t think much of it, as he knew just how close both were. “It was absolutely fucking amazing. Like I thought we’d be done for the night, fully tapped out but after like 5 minutes she’d be right back on me for another round.” He chuckled, his flush even worse than before. “Ayyyeee good for you corpse, glad to hear that puss is bussin.” He laughed at this, throwing his head back. “Yeah, it’s bussin bussin.”
Both men talk as they read from their phones, eyes wide in absolute awe of the love they received from the song. They had just dropped it a few days prior, not expecting the cry of joy from both fan bases.
He didn’t even look up from it when she walked in, until she bent down to plant a kiss to his forehead. “Sorry I had completely forgot about the tea I made you an hour ago, but I put it back on the stove to heat it up so if it’s twisting funky just tell me okay?” Before he could even thank her, both their heads whipped towards the loudness from the other line. “Y/N? Is that you? What in the hell are you doing there with corpse!” He didn’t sound angry, more shocked than anything, both of them looking at the phone in confusion. “I, I love here? Remember I told you like a month ago I was moving in with him?” “WHAT!” Both jumped at the loud scream. “Wait so you guys are dating!?” Both we’re even more perplexed, until it dawned on both of them. Their eyes wide as they turned their heads to one another slowly. “Wait you didn’t tell him?” “No? He’s one of your best friends so I thought you did!” “He’s your brother! So I thought you did!” Both whisper, until all three lay silent. That was until, the large cry of laughter that leaves the two, leaving colson even more confused. He wasn’t mad, not at all actually. More shocked and confused than anything. Until he started thinking, it does make sense, all the times they spoke about one another without him knowing, all the times they mentioned-“OH GOD!” He yelled, gagging violently, making them stop their laughing fit. “What's wrong? Why are you yelling?” She asks “like a month ago corpse was talking about how he was tired cause he was up all night having sex AND I HAD NO IDEA HE WAS TALKING ABOUT YOU! OH GOD WAS THAT WHY YOU WERE LIMPING THAT DAY WITH CAS AND I!” Both laugh even harder, as they listen to his ever growing gags.
“So yeah,. That’s literally how we had no idea we were keeping the relationship secret from her brother.” He laughed, as he red the comments and listened to his friends' laughter. She sat beside him, head laying on his shoulder as he told the story. She couldn’t help but to look back up into his eyes, as he glanced down at her, planting a soft kiss to her lips. “Keep it pg guys.” Colson said from the other line, making them chuckle.
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kimnjss · 4 years ago
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only you | jjk
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⤑  series: cherry pickers
⤑ pairing: gamer(fuckboi)!jungkook x video vixen(virgin)!reader
⤑ genre: some angst :/... nd fluff!! (implied smut)
⤑ rating: explicit 
⤑ word count: 3.3K // unedited.
⤑ warnings: slight dry humping, groping, neck kissing, a lot of inner monologuing, yn turns her emotions on nd off (lowkey scary), there are some tears, jungkook shows up w a ponytail nd glasses (what the actual fuckkk), 
⤑ A/N: uhm!? i think there’s like one more chapter left ., hello??? this was wicked fast i didn’t expect it but yeah . pretty sure there’s one more after this one guys??? 
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JUNE 15TH, 2020 | 23:43
Fighting Jimin. That's the only solution you can come up with for the way he's been acting the past few days. You had to fight him. Not only did he post, and tag!, you in an image of you and Jungkook... from a happier time, he has been 'accidentally' sending you alike pictures and even gone as far as to ask you to find a picture of the two of you for him to post.
What was his problem? It was like he was ignoring the fact that the two of you were on the rocks? All for what? To further this brand new interest in photography that really didn't have to include either you or Jungkook? 
It was annoying. The constant reminder of the good thing that you had, which was always directly followed by the worry of whether or not the two of you would be able to get back to the way you were. Of course, you wanted to be with Jungkook. You... had really strong feelings for him, but at the same time, you weren't sure if the Jungkook you fell for even existed.
What if it was all an act?
It didn't feel like one. Jungkook always seemed so genuine, so pure whenever he was with you. He took his time getting to know you, it really felt like he was himself around you. And he really has no given you any reason to doubt your relationship before, so why now? 
He explained himself, has given you the space that you asked for... so were you just being stubborn? Overreacting? Or reacting just the right amount? You couldn't tell, but the more you thought about it the stronger the urge to just go and see him grew. And Jimin's daily semi-hourly messages for couple shots of the two of you were not helping.
Now it seemed like every little thing reminded you of him. Had been doing such a great job at removing him from your thoughts, but with each scroll through your camera roll, you're hit with another memory and then swarmed with the countless memories you made in your own home.
You contemplated selling the place but ruled that as crazy. Maybe you'd just rent it out? Something. Anything so that everywhere you turn, you wouldn't be bombarded with all things Jungkook. The couch where the two of you spent nights cuddled up, kitchen where he'd cook for you, bedroom where you...
It was all becoming too much, a little bit overwhelming at times too. But bearable if you concentrated hard enough. You weren't really breaking until late one night. No text from Jimin, but you still found yourself scrolling through your camera roll. Smiling at a picture the two of you had taken.
Just of your fingers intertwined over the middle console of his car, nothing major but you find yourself missing how well his fingers fit in yours. The simple way you'd trace the tattoos printed on his knuckles. They were always so warm in yours and he never minded how cold you always were. Took it upon himself to warm you up. Oh! And the way he'd mindlessly reach for your hands whenever you were laying together, toying with them as he rambled about God knows what.
You missed him. So much, it hurt. All you wanted was to be near him, fuck everything else. Why did everything else have to be so complicated? Why did you have to ever find out about that stupid bet? Things were so much better when you had no idea what he and his ex-friends talked about. He'd still be in your arms right now, playing with your fingers if it wasn't for that.
Before you even have the chance to stop yourself, fresh tears are rolling down your cheeks. A sob breaking through your throat as salty droplets land on the screen of your phone. For the first time, in a very long time, you feel lonely. And the only person that you want to be with is Jungkook. Positive if you were in a room full of people and he wasn't there, this lonely feeling wouldn't go away.
You needed to call him. Hear his voice, his laugh, anything. You needed him.
The phone only rings once before he's picking up, sounding out of breath as if he had been working out. Little did you know, Jungkook had been waiting weeks for your call. Ready to run the moment your familiar ringtone was blaring through his phone speakers. His voice is breathy, but it still makes your heart skip a beat. “Hello?”
“Jungkook,” As soon as his name is leaving your lips, you're realizing how much you've missed saying it. And that thought alone has you crying harder. “Jungkook...” You repeat with a heavy sigh, head falling in your hand as you try to wipe the tears that just won't stop coming.
He shushes you on the other line, the sound of your cries has a crumbling feeling taking over his chest. He hated that he's the reason you sound like that, that he's the one that hurt you. All he wants to do is hold you and tell you that everything was going to be okay, but he wasn't sure if that would be the truth.
There was only one thing that he could tell you that he was sure of. So he's apologizing, over and over again. For what he did, for what he didn't do, for making you cry. The pained sound of his voice only has your sobs growing louder, because he's hurting too. None of this made sense, you wanted to be together. So why not just be together?
“C-can you come over... please?”
He's nearly rushing for the front door at the quiet sound of your voice. Had hoped to hear you say that, wanted nothing more than to be with you right now. Even if it was only for a little while. He missed you, all he wanted was to see you. Three weeks was too long for him to spend away from you.
Then again, this wasn't about him. “Are you sure?”
“No. I feel like I'm all broken up. And it's your fault... but only you can make me feel better. I know that.” You're huffing, obviously frustrated with yourself. Ruffling is heard from your end of the phone and he can only imagine you're roughly wiping at your face. One final sniffle sounding, followed by a sharp clear of your throat. Mentally deciding that that was enough. No more crying.
He can almost feel the wall going back up, shielding him from the emotions you had let slip. Locking them back up where they couldn't make you look weak. He can even hear the difference in your tone now as if you hadn't just been crying to him two seconds ago.
“Yeah, come over.”
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JUNE 16TH, 2020 | 00:27
Jungkook shows up at your front door almost immediately. Did not need to be told twice, he was on his way as soon as the words were leaving your mouth. Handsome, like he always is. 
Long hair pulled out of his face, you had said it was cute once so he figured he'd try to appeal to you. His white long sleeve is clean, baggy gray sweats hanging low on his hips. He looks like your Jungkook. Despite the weeks you spent apart, he still looks the same. So inviting, you wanted to be in his arms.
A pair of glasses rest on the tip of his nose and through them, you can see the slight red of his pretty brown eyes, the puffiness that surrounds them. Jimin had mentioned a few times before how much he's cried in the past few weeks, you never thought it would be this obvious though. It makes your heart hurt.
He's closing the door behind him after you let him in, kicking his shoes off in the threshold and then staring at you. Neither of you sure what to do next, what to say. It's the first time that you feel awkward around each other and it kills you. Nothing was ever awkward with Jungkook, he was always so eager and obvious.
But now, it was like he didn't even know where to look.
“You can go sit down,” You say after a while of just standing there, silently competing to see who can avoid eye contact the longest. 
It's weird, normally he'd be kicking off his shoes and heading straight to the couch. Demanding that you sit too so he can put his head on your lap. Much different from the careful steps that he takes across the living room as if he's never been there before. He's sitting with his head bowed, hands clasped in front of him.
And you almost expect him to mumble out a: 'Nice place you got here,'. He doesn't. What he does do has you almost convinced that things aren't so bad between the two of you now. In the shyest, sweetest Jungkook voice, he's saying, “Come sit with me too,” It's quieter than you're used too, but still holds a certain familiarity to it that you can't mask your smile.
There's a lot you need to get off your chest, but you have no idea where to start. You don't have it in you to be mad at him anymore, it had you feeling heavy all this time and you just wanted to let it go. You just wanted to be with him, but you knew that in order for that to happen properly... the two of you needed to talk.
“You told me you loved me.” His words have been like a skipping record since he was rushing them out. Despite the undesirable nature, he was telling you, he had still told you and it hasn't left your mind since.
Jungkook's eyes are going wide, cheeks turning pink, caught off guard with the way you're able to just blurt it out. He had said it and meant it, never thought about taking it back. But wished he had done it differently. At the moment, he was panicked, worried that he was losing you so it came out.
If he had the chance to do it again, he'd come up with a speech, something that let you know how much you mean to him, how lucky he thought he was to get to be with you... and then he'd say it. Not in the midst of an argument as an attempt to get you to stay with him. That was fucked on his part, though.
And there was nothing he could do about it, the cat was already out of the bag. “Yes. I said that. And I meant it.” He's not sure where you're going with this conversation if you're preparing him for the clean break of your relationship or whatever, but he urges himself to be patient. You're the one in charge because he had hurt you.
This was your call.
“I know you have changed, Jungkook. You're so much different from when I first met you. I can see that. I just... the bet made me doubt whether or not the changes I saw were genuine. I didn't know what to believe, but now.” Weeks upon weeks, you spent thinking about this. Weighing your options, thinking, and rethinking the situation. You wanted to be right.
You wanted this to be right. “Now, I want to believe you, Jungkook. How you were when you were with me... I don't think someone can fake that. I kinda knew you loved me before you said it, you know? I could feel it or whatever. I don't think something like that could be all for pretend,” You're not even looking at him, but you can feel the way hope lifts his body.
He's all but jumping at the chance to assure you. “It wasn't pretend, I swear. Every last thing between us was all real. I fell in love with you, Yn. I love you.” He's reaching for your hands, lacing your fingers together. His are warm against yours and the warmth is quickly spreading throughout your entire body.
Warming your cheeks and coaxing fresh tears to pool at the brim of your eyes. “I love you too,” If you had held it in a second longer, you're positive you would've puked. Something like that needed to be said out loud. And from the way his face lights up from your slightly teary confession, it's worth it.
Jungkook moves before he can stop himself, leaning forward to cover your lips with his. It's a soft, quick kiss that doesn't last long before he's realizing what he's doing. Quick to pull away, that light pink dusting over his cheeks as he mumbles out an apology.
“It's okay. Just, uhm, one more thing.” He's leaning back to give you some space you don't exactly favor. Fingers pushing through his hair as he nods, teeth and tongue working over his lip. “Of course. What is it?”
He looks ready to fix any issue you might have with being him and you don't doubt that he'd work himself making sure that everything was all right. That's the thing, though. There weren't any real problems being with him, Jungkook was a good guy. You knew that and he showed you time and time again, just in case you forgot.
Being overwhelmed in the moment had you losing sight of that, doubting him in ways that he never gave you a reason to. He was always good to you, since the beginning. And that was something you found a little hard to understand. “Why me? I mean, it's no secret you've had a plethora of girls knocking on your door. So how come you chose me to fall in love with?” A tiny insecure thought that popped in your head from time to time, but a lot more in the past few weeks.
What made you so different?
The sound of his laugh is the last thing you expect to hear. His pretty smile rests on his lips as the sweet sound dies down, eyes shining as he looks at you. “I didn't choose you, baby. I got lucky and you chose me. And I have zero complaints. I don't know if you know this, Yn. But you have really high standards. You make me want to be better for you.” He's confident this time when he reaches for you, hands settling on your hips as he tugs you toward him.
A natural position between the two of you, sat up with your legs draped over his hips his stretched out behind you. Crazy how perfectly you fit in his arms. “No one has made me feel the way you have. Only you.” You're embarrassed with how dramatic your heart is for this man.
Fingers brush hair from your face as he leans closer to you, nose just barely brushing against yours. “Does that answer your question?” Using that deep voice of his that you only recently discovered. Eyes lifting to look at you through his long lashes, your entire body heats up from the look alone.
“Yes, it does.”
The corners of his lips lift into a smile, fingers tracing the side of your face to tip your chin up toward his. Gaze dropping to your lips, then back up to your eyes. “Can I kiss you now?” There's something about him asking that makes you want it more.
Paired with the patient way he sits awaiting your answer, holding you close but still giving you space. Subtle things that he did to make sure you were comfortable, make sure that he was never pushing too much. Jungkook was constantly proving to you that you could trust him, without a word.
And you do, trust him. With everything you do. So you don't even have to think twice about nodding your head, welcoming his lips onto yours. His fingers tangling in your hair to hold your head in place as his mouth moves over yours. Kissing you the way that he's dreamt of after all this time.
He's missed you. Being apart from you was something that he never wanted to do again and he was going to make sure that neither of you would have to experience that again. His warm tongue glides over your lower lip and you're sure he's going to push his way through.
But he doesn't, instead, he's dragging his teeth over your skin, dragging your lip back as you pull away. It's hot. The feeling of his teeth pressed into your skin, the look on his face as he does it. You can't help the soft moan that falls from your lips. A sound that goes straight to his pants.
“Tell me that thing again, you know? About how you feel about me...” There's a hint of blush on his cheeks. It makes you feel warm all over. Lifting your arms, you wrap them around his neck, scooting a bit lower on his lap. Hips pressed against his.
You think about teasing him, acting as if you have no idea what he's talking about. One look at the slightly nervous look on his face is stealing all of that way. As if you wouldn't say it again like the first time had been a fluke. Yeah, right.
Lips molded against his, you place a sweet kiss on them. Smiling brightly as you pull away, lifting your gaze to look him right in the eye. He needed to know that you meant business when you said what was coming next. “I love you, Jungkook. Only you.” He's kissing you again before the words can fully leave your lips, hand pressed firmly on your back as he holds you to him.
The slow lift of his hips, dragging a moan from you. “I just told you I love you. Why are you hard?” Your giggle vibrates against his lips. Jungkook does nothing to pull back, lips still sealed together as he murmurs.
“It's a love boner,” He groans softly, rolling his hips up. Using the grip he holds in your hair to tilt your head back, trailing his lips down toward your jawline. Sucking wet kisses into your skin, creating a path toward your collarbones.
Your laughter is interrupted by a moan, your own hips moving at their own accord into his. His cock dragging against your core through the fabric of your clothes, but you can still feel him as if you were bare. His freehand is traveling down your back to grip your ass, encouraging the movement of your hips.
Gruff grunts leave his lips from the friction and it takes everything in you to concentrate on your words. “S-shut up, those aren't real. All you think about is sex,” Ignoring the moans that lace your words and the insistent roll of your hips. He's the focus subject here.
Jungkook is shaking his head quickly, pulling back to get a good look at your face. Already flushed and he was just getting started. “Correction. All I think about is you. How my body reacts is not my fault,” You laugh to hide your blush, hand reaching out to shove at his shoulder.
“You're an idiot,” You're mumbling out, which he assumes is code for some term of endearment in your head. He'll take it, leaning down to press yet another soft kiss to your lips.
There was no way he'd grow tired of the feeling he got from kissing you. “And I love you. And you love me too. So let's make love,” It's corny, so you have no idea why your heart is screaming, fighting against your rib cage to get to him. But you've learned to not have everything figured out when it came to Jungkook. Things were the way they were and you liked them exactly that way.
You loved it.
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— known for your body and surrounded by rumors about your sex life… rumors that he doesn’t think to doubt. until he’s meeting you… forced to realize there’s much more to you then the thonged shorts and lacy costumes.
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randomshyperson · 4 years ago
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Wanda Maximoff x Reader / The Parent Trap - Final
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Summary: When the identical twins Billy and Tommy Maximoff are sent to the same summer camp, they hatch a plan to get their mothers back together by switching places. Or, The Parent Trap AU.
Read on AO3 - Complete
Warnings: Fluff and a bit of language.
Notes: Tumblr won't let me answer anyone's comments, but don't think I didn't read yours in the first part post!!! Thanks for all the replies. Happy reading. Also, gif is not mine, and is absolutely perfect.
PART I 
Wanda was not going to the camp.
Billy and Tommy were not the least bit happy about the news, but she insisted that it was best that they get used to Tabitha's presence in the family. You ignored the part of yourself that wanted to beg Wanda to go, and acted like a grown woman and more importantly, a committed one.
Wanda waved to you from the porch of your house while Nat gave you a wry smile and a look that said "we'll be talking about you the whole time" as you drove off.
At least the drive up to the mountains was quiet, you sang songs on the radio with the boys while Tabitha filled herself with repellent while she complained about the weather.
It was good to be in nature. You and Billy had made it a late summer ritual to spend time camping for a weekend and it was always great fun. 
You were optimistic that it would be even more special now that Tommy was present.
- Hurry up, please. We have to arrive before sunset. - You told the three who were following you down the rocky path with difficulty. 
- I need to drink some water and breathe, okay? I'll catch up with you. - says Tabitha, looking tired. She sits down on a rock next. You want to reach the place where you're staying before it gets dark, so you just nod in agreement and keep walking.
You have just walked a short distance when you hear your fiancée's scream. You run back the way you came and find her waving her hands in the air as if she had seen something.
- Tabi, what happened? - you ask worriedly.
- A monster attacked me! - she exclaimed with a mixture of disgust and fear, pointing at something on the ground. You looked in the direction and found only a frightened lizard, lying against one of the rocks, and let out a chuckle. Tabi then turned to the boys next to you with an angry expression. - These little brats have something to do with this!
- Come on, Tabitha. Stop it. - You scold her. - We have to go, okay? Hurry up.
You think harmony has improved when you're all sitting around the campfire.
- Those damn mosquitoes seem to like this stuff! - grumbled Tabitha angrily at your side. You frowned curiously.
- Let me see what you're using. - You took the transparent container, and twirled it around in your fingers. Then you sprinkled some on your own hand and smelled it. And then you giggled. - You'll attract all the bugs in the world with this. It's sugar water.
Tabitha let out a disgruntled sigh as she threw the package on the floor.
- Aren't you going to eat dinner? - you ask, noting that she was the only one who didn't help herself to the trout.
She lets out a wry chuckle.
- No, thanks. - She says. - I don't eat that stuff. I'll wait for breakfast. What are we having?
- Trout. - Your children answer in unison in a wry tone. You find it funny but prefer not to laugh.
- Great. - Tabitha rebuts impatiently. And then she gets up and says she's going to bed. You are trying to keep the little bit of trout left from burning, and are slightly startled when you feel Tabitha's hands on your neck. She gives you an open-mouth kiss, and you feel really uncomfortable. You don't notice the look of defiance she throws at your children. - Good night, honey.
- Good night. - You mumble with confusion at such a sudden display of affection.
You end up going to bed very late after Tabitha leaves. Much because your children are extremely more talkative and comfortable when she is not present. And then you spend hours listening to history of the camp and of Tommy, whom you knew so little about but loved so deeply. Maybe you ask too much about Wanda, but Tommy doesn't mind telling.
You send them to their tents as Billy begins to doze off against his brother. You can't help but think about how much you will miss the other half of your family when they return to London.
You awake in fright to the sound of a distant scream. You stumble between the blankets to open the tent, and when you pop your head out, you frown at the image of an angry, and completely drenched Tabitha walking toward where you were coming out of the lake.
You hurry out of the tent.
- Tabi, what happened? - You ask but take a step back when she continues to advance aggressively towards you.
- Here's the deal girl. - she says angrily as she catches up to you. - The day we get married, I'm going to send these brats to the first Swiss boarding school I can find! You choose now, me or them!
- Them. - you say without hesitation, a smile escaping your lips. 
- I beg your pardon? - Tabitha asks incredulously.
- Them. - You repeat, then spell it out. - T-H-E-M. Got it?
Tabitha starts flailing in front of you with high-pitched screams and pushes you away. You roll your eyes impatiently and turn back to your tent to pack up.
Tommy and Billy are laughing in their tent but you don't scold them.
You park the car in the doorway while you help the kids down with their bags. Wanda gets out on the porch and walks quickly over to you.
- You are back early. And where is Tabitha? - she asks, frowning. You let out a humorless chuckle.
- We had a little disagreement. - you say as you put one of the larger backpacks on the floor. And then you reached into your shirt pocket and pulled out a ring. - She threw this in my face.
- Damn, I'm sorry. - Wanda said, but she didn't really seem upset.
- Oh, no. It's okay. - You said. - I think she finally showed me who she really was. Nature does that to people. - You remark with a light humor in your voice, and then hand the boys their backpacks. - How long are you two boys grounded anyway?
- Until college. - They respond grumpily as they walk back to the house.
You lean against the car with your arms crossed.
- Are you really all right? - Wanda asks.
- Yes, Wands. - You assure her. - Tabitha really thought she could send my children away from me. 
- What?
You laughed humorlessly, and told Wanda about the outburst the other woman had had. The redhead seemed really angry, but you told her not to worry about it, the marriage was undone now, and Tabitha would not be coming back into your lives.
- I think I'd like a drink. - You remark. - But I'm going to take a shower first. Will you join me? - Wanda's cheeks flushed and she raised her eyebrow. You felt your own face heat up and quickly clarified. - I meant the drinks. Later.
- Of course. - She says simply, looking down at the floor. You hurry inside without knowing much of anything to say.
You eventually discover that Natasha is not home when you finish dressing and go downstairs to the kitchen. Wanda is sitting on one of the stools on the counter, reading the newspaper, and lets you know that Nat and Pietro have gone on a tour that she was sure consisted of Natasha showing Pietro places to drink in California.
- I guess dinner will be on me then. - You remark as you open the cupboard.
- Do you cook now? - she asked as she put the newspaper on the counter and leaned her head on her hands to look at you.
- Oh yes. - you say in a slightly ironic tone. - I know how to make pasta. And pasta....
Wanda giggles.
- Pasta sounds delicious. - She says smiling gently at you. 
- Of course it does, I'm a great chef. - You joke while separating the ingredients.
When you are finished, you carry the boys' dinner to their rooms before returning to the dining room. The boys comment that you look nice, but you just smile and close their door.
You and Wanda sit on opposite sides and you try not to get used to the feeling of sharing a meal with her. It is so easy and cozy to have her in your home. 
- You know you can tell me what you want to say. - Wanda comments after a few minutes since you have been eating in silence. - You don't have to put on your contemplative face and be completely silent.
You bite back a smile on your lips. It was almost embarrassing how easily Wanda could read you.
- What I want to say doesn't need to be said. - You retort with a hint of humor in your voice. Wanda raises an eyebrow in surprise and defiance.
- Try me.
You smile, but feel embarrassed. Then it's easier to roll your eyes around the room and gesticulate while talking.
- I was thinking how nice it is to have you here. - You confess. - How easy it feels, and how good it makes me feel. And I know I shouldn't think so, but I do. Is that enough for you, darling?
Wanda seems shocked, to say the least, by your honesty. Her cheeks redden, but she holds her gaze.
- Yeah, I, too, feel the same way. - she says finally.
You try not to smile so much, and focus on finishing your dinner, while Wanda does the same.
After you have washed the dishes, you mention that drink from earlier.
You take Wanda to your personal wine cellar. You know it's intimate and romantic, and exactly the kind of thing you would do on a date, but it feels so natural that you barely think about it.
You go downstairs to the wine cellar, while you walk with Wanda at your side among the stands, showing her your favorite wines.
- Oh, you'll like this. - You comment as you lead her to a small cabinet. You open the cabinet to reveal dusty bottles. - These are special wines for me. - You carefully grab one of the bottles, and show it to Wanda, while trying not to be too affected by having her so close to you. - This wine I had at my graduation.
- Wow, Peru, 1745. - She comments rubbing her finger on the bottle as she reads the date. You stored the item afterwards. 
- This here is the wine I got at Steve's wedding. - You say pointing to the bottle on the far right. And then you bite your lip, deciding on the next one. - And this one. - You pick up one of the bottles from the top. - This one is very special to me.
You handed the bottle gently to Wanda, who analyzed its contents.
- The Avenger, Sokovia, 1421. - She read it with a small smile. - Why is it special?
You smiled at her, your hands in your pockets.
- It's our wedding wine. - You said. - It took me a long time to find it, but now I have every bottle ever produced.
- Oh.
You thought you were too close, because you could feel Wanda's breath against your face. And you were terrified, but you stepped forward. 
- We can't... - she whispered as your foreheads touched. You sighed, and then stepped away just as she took a step back. You swallowed the tightness in your throat when you saw the thick tears in her eyes.
- Why not?
Wanda gently shook her head in denial, but she did not cry.
- You don't always have to be so brave. - You told her, feeling your own heart break at the rejection.
- But I do.
And then you heard the sound of the car in the garage, indicating the return of Pietro and Natasha, and the moment was broken. Wanda handed you back the bottle of wine before rushing out, and you wiped the tears from your eyes as you put the drink back away.
And then Wanda was leaving. And it was raining heavily.
You pushed all your feelings to the back of your mind, and remained tender and calm while your children said good-bye to each other, and Billy to his mother. You thought that crying would make them more nervous. And then you hugged Wanda tight before letting her go again.
As Billy and Natasha walked them to the taxi, you let the tears flow. And then you realized that you would not go through this again. You couldn't lose Wanda twice.
You have about a two-hour head start when you arrive in London with Billy. And then you are standing in the doorway of Wanda's house, and you are trembling. Billy holds your hand when you knock.
Erik Lehnsherr is old. That's the first thought that comes to your mind when you see Wanda and Pietro's father. And he seems relatively surprised to see you too, but the shock only lasts a minute, the next he smiles and hugs you tight.
- Look at you, rebenok. - he exclaims happily as he pulls you into the house while grabbing Billy’s hand. - You look beautiful! 
When you go in for tea, and you explain that you would not leave Wanda again, you also find out that he helped Billy get Wanda to London and you are immensely grateful. And you talk for a long time, until Wanda and Billy arrive.
- Dad! We are home! - You hear Wanda shouting around the place. 
- Hey, Grandpa. - You hear Tommy enter Erik's office, assuming that whoever is behind the desk reading the paper is the man. But it's Billy who puts down the paper, and greets his brother back. - What are you doing here?
- Billy! - exclaims Wanda in surprise as she enters the room. Billy gets up from his chair with a huge smile on his face.
- It took about 5 seconds after you left for us to realize that we couldn't let you go. 
- We? - asked Wanda unsure.
You stepped out of the cover of the pylon you were standing on and made yourself visible to Tommy and Wanda.
- We. - You checked with a smile. - I already made the mistake of not going after you once, Wanda. I will never do that again.
- What... what do you expect me to do? - Wanda asks in a tearful and slightly ironic tone, and you begin to walk slowly towards her. - That I say we will work this out? An intercontinental relationship with our children being raised here and there... and we... We pick up where we left off. Growing old together... Is that what you want?
- Yes. - You whisper as you reach for her and lift your hands to her face, wiping her tears gently. - Yes to all questions. And don't forget our happy ending.
Wanda lets out a short laugh, and then you kiss her. It's sweet, and tender, and energizes your whole body, and melts your heart. The kiss is like coming home.
You get married on the same ship where you met. This time Pietro and Natasha are the best man. The cake is very good, and the boys get a stomach ache from eating so much. Steve, Tony, Bucky, Sam, Thor, and many more of all their mutual friends show up at the party. 
You think your life has never felt so complete.
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laketaj24 · 4 years ago
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Serotonin II
Author’s Note: Here it is! I am taking requests, and the taglist is open, drop your name under this fic or on this list if you are interested! This does have a prior part but can be read as a standalone.
Pairing: Colson Baker x Reader
Warning: Smut, breeding kink
Inspo Song: Bad Things
Part I
My MASTERLIST
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Colson: Busy?
Y/N: Why would I be busy?
Colson: For sure ain’t been answering my texts 🥱
Y/N: You need something, Col?
Colson: You know you only call me Col when you’re half asleep or whimpering my name when you about to cum. Let me come over.
Tongue-tied, his messages left you baffled. They were a smooth variation of sexting mixed with pleading. Every message included a very Colson apology but a rebuttal that followed and reminded you why you couldn’t fall back in the same routine with him. It was easy to picture yourself back with him, nestled against his lean frame - listening to his voice as it rumbled against his chest as he rambled on. You saw it clear as day, but the truth of the matter was he didn’t do what you required to have you back in his life. Fucking you in the bathroom of some club like a whore, giving your body a fix, but your heart and mind still felt that hesitation when it came to Mr. Baker.
“Are you listening?” Dana asked, holding up the soy powder milk for your nephew.
“I heard you clear as day.”
“You sure you didn’t just daydream the entire I talked about not feeding Jaylen after seven?” Dana placed the soy milk on the table and glanced down at her newborn. “If you’re not up to it, I can stay. I hate going out of town so soon after having him.” She tapped her soon on the back a few times and exhaled.
“We will be fine.”
“You say this, but I don’t believe you.”
“Why?”
“You’re head has been shot ever since you broke up with the delinquent.” She rolled her eyes. “And what pisses me off is Tyla loves him!” She whispered and turned her attention to the seven-year-old parked in front of the tv. “I mean worships him.”
“I know. Colson is good with kids.”
“Because he’s childish.” She added. “He’s basically a six variant of one.”
“You can’t say one thing nice?”
“His music isn’t shitty,” Dana added. “I will be back at eight for the both of them, and I swear not to do this again, just my boss needs me, and their dad is busy.” She lied. “So- I love you, sis. Call Eric!” Dana kissed your cheek and sprinted out the door without another word.
Eric, you hadn’t seen him since you left the club a week ago, and you barely responded to his texts. The ride home was awkward; the entire time, he talked about how much he enjoyed the night. And the only thing you could think about was getting bent over in the bathroom by your ex. Good date.
Auntie duty had started. Diapers, Tiktok, YouTube, and some weird pig cartoon lay ahead of you for the next nine hours. Jaylen slept peacefully in his playpen, unbothered by his mother's lack while Tyla consumed her tv.
Colson: I got food open the door.
Y/N: What door?
Colson: Your apartment door. It’s Chipotle.
Fuck, you were hungry.
Y/N: Leave the food on the porch.
Colson: I’m not a god damn door dash.
The abrupt knocking startled Jaylen, soo you took him in your arms and walked to the door, “Stay in the living room Tyla.”
“K,” She answered, not even looking up from her phone.
You opened the door revealing Colson in his pink hoodie and gray joggers. He held bags of food in his hand and garnished a big smile on his face, “You look good with a baby.”
“Why are you here?”
“You wouldn’t come to see me or invite me over, so invited myself over. Can I come in?”
“No.” Jaylen stirred in your arms, his plump little legs kicked, and you sighed. “I am busy today. That’s why I didn’t invite you over. I have to keep my nieces and nephews, and every time you are over here, you either curse too much or we end up fucking.”
“Watch your mouth.” He teased.
“How were you texting with all that in your hands?” You stared at him.
“You know I got talented hands.”
“Colson!”
Why? You grimaced inwardly before looking at your overly excited niece, she loved Colson, and you hated to admit, he might be an asshole sometimes, but he loved kids. He was a wonder with them. You slapped your face, disappointed there was not a way to hide the massive man at your door. “He can’t stay.” You answered before the question left your lips.
“Why? Please!” Tyla pouted her pink lips and threw her arms up in defeat. “We never see him anymore.”
“That’s your aunt’s fault,” Colson added fuel to the fire. “I won’t stay long.” He pushed through, entering your apartment to greet Tyla with a hug at her level and a sly wink to you. Kids were the way to your heart – and his, but he would not win you over with this bullshit today. Not at all. “You hungry, Tyla?”
“Yeah, ten minutes, and you’re out.”
“Damn.”
“Tiktok?’ she held up her phone and the ring light from her purple book bag. “Please.”
“Word, what are we learning?” He raised his brows to you and proceeded to make himself comfortable on the couch; she was ecstatic, immediately standing to do a dance and drag you over to learn it too. Tiktok had become the bane of your existence, but for Tyla and her half a million followers, she was golden.
One hour later and you were tired, you’d perfected the dance, and Colson had convinced her to let him skip the dancing and just be—it was all he had to do though, she’d get one million views just because of who he was, and now everyone would know you were with him. Your heart dropped a little thinking about the exposure while she edited the video next to both of you.
“Why is Uncle Colson never around?” Tyla never looked up from her phone; she just continued her mission of posting that sixty-second video and ruining your life.
“He’s not your uncle.” You corrected.
“That’s your aunt’s fault too.” He added.
“Don’t start with me.” The harsh whisper came out as a warning, waking baby Jaylen from his nap and making Colson chuckle in amusement.
“I like him; I want him in the family.”
“I want a million dollars.”
“I can give you that.” He said.
“And a loyal boyfriend who doesn’t text insta-sluts in his spare time.”
“Don’t use sluts in front of her damn; your mouth is outrageous Y/N.”
The narrowing of your eyes made him burst into laughter again. He was damn good at annoying you like he had it mastered.
The day passed quickly with him making eyes at you, caring for Jaylen while she styled Colson’s hair in four ponytails atop his head, garnished with bows, and she even attempted to give him edges. He didn’t care; as long as she was happy, he was good.
“You look a mess.”
“It’s cool.” Colson snapped a picture. “Been waiting forever to see if ponytail was for me or not; it’s a no.” He sat back on the couch while Tyla disappeared to your room for god knows what else. “You look good with babies, you know?”
“You’ve said that.”
“I meant it; you’re good with them too.” He sighed. “I thought about kids with us, like every damn day.”
“Funny.” You shrugged, and she appeared with your bright pink polish. “What’re you doing, Tyla?”
“Painting his nails.” She plopped down in front of him, and without hesitation, he held his hand out for her. “We did blue last time.”
“Yep.” He exhaled. “Don’t you want this?”
He didn’t have to elaborate; you knew what he was talking about, but a family was the last thing from your mind, no matter how perfect the scenario looked right now. “Do you?”
Colson smacked his lips. “We can talk later.”
“You leaving when they do.” You reiterated.
The door opened thirty minutes later without a knock or doorbell; Dana never announced herself. “I see he found his way back in.” Her mouth dropped as soon as her eyes met him. “Tyla just had her way today, didn’t she.” She laughed. “Oh god, she gave this man braids.”
“Your daughter is talented.” He laughed. “Might be a new look.”
“Ridiculous.” She held her laughter. “Ty, get up and come on, love; we have a long drive.” She took Jaylen from your chest and gave you a look. “How long is he staying?”
“Not long, sis, drive safe.”
“I will. Colson, you leave in ten minutes, or I’m sending our brother over.” She pointed to him.
“I’m not scared of Michael; send him.” Why did his arrogance only make you want him more? He looked to Dana, who, like him, was not bothered.
“I hate him.” She mumbled as she left. “I just fucking hate him.”
“It’s mutual!” Colson laughed as the door shut. “You’re gonna stay over there the whole time?”
“Aint no reason for me to be over there for real.” You thought of three reasons to stay where you were, the drop in his voice, the tension in this room that could be cut with a knife, and when he was alone with you, your willpower was nonexistent. “You have five minutes.”
“We aren’t going to talk about this, are we? You like being evasive and shit? That you’re new persona?”
“I have no new persona. This is me not playing into all the bullshit you bring when you’re with me. This is a wall.”
“I’m about to knock that wall over.” He smirked.
“Stay on your couch.” You warned.
Colson held his hands up, acting defenseless, “I wasn’t moving from this spot.”
“My sister hates you, you know that? She literally said that I would be better off leaving Cali before staying here with your toxic ass.” You found yourself pointing at him and wanting to knock that smile from his face. Colson liked to see you get feisty with him; he called that foreplay, and here you were dancing to the beat of his drum, pissed.
“How am I toxic? I stopped all that shit for you, every ounce of it.”
“Stop lying.”
Colson grinned at you, unwavering in his position and impressed that you were persistent in yours; your usual fights lasted about one day. You’d take him back, and everything went back to how it was before, but that changed nothing; you wanted him to change. “I am not lying to you. Come here.”
You walked over to him, taking his hand and allowing him to pull you down in his lap. Facing him, you admired all the little cuts he’d earned over the years in senseless fights or accidents. Your fingers traced over them before you cupped his face. What the fuck were you doing? Why were the two of you akin to magnets? Drawing one another in half of the time and then at the flip of a side hating one another? You placed your lips on him, parting his lips with your tongue and then flicking playfully over his teeth before he caught your bottom lip with his teeth and tugged. The slight pressure made you moan against him. He cradled your neck with one hand, not allowing you to escape him. Colson deepened the kiss, adding pressure and taking what little breath you had away. “I fucking miss you, Y/N.” He rasped.
"Don't talk.”You murmured back.
Colson didn’t listen; he never listened.  “You were good with them today.”
You growled, grinding your hips on him. “Shut up, Colson.”
“I want to talk to you, I want you back Y/N, shit. Like I am trying, I canceled recording sessions, appearances, and other shit all this month so we can figure this out. I don’t want to-,”
You stopped him from talking, gripping his cock through the sweats with one hand and kissing him to shut up.
“Stop.” In one fluid motion, your hands were by your side, and your eyes were on his, “We’re talking; I was not fucking other women. But I was entertaining them, and it’s no excuse. I know you’re hurt; I’m sorry. Like real talk, no joke – I apologize.”
“How do I know it won’t happen again?’
“I'll delete all this shit for you,” He admitted. “Fuck a platform.”
“You’re so dramatic.”
“I’m dead ass right now. Fuck it all. I just want you.”
“If it happens again, I am never taking you back, ever.”
“It won’t.” He whispered, loosening the grip on your hands.
You took advantage of the notion, moving your hand down to his cock, rubbing the hilt through his sweats again.
“Nah,” He gripped your hair, pulling you back, so your eyes met him. “It’s my turn now.” He pushed aside your shorts in seconds, and his fingers plunged into your pussy, curling for a moment and then spinning out of you. He placed his fingers on your lips, “Open up.” You didn’t hesitate to take his fingers, licking your own juices from them, and he tapped your face sending a slight pleasurable sting. “How you taste?”
“Ready.” You pulled him from the sweats feeling him jump at your cool hands, and stood up, wriggling out of the shorts before hovering back over him again.
Colson playfully tosses you on your couch, draping one leg to the ground. “Let me taste.” He whispered as he descended between your legs. Colson’s fingers brushed your swollen clit, before his lips latched on, sucking. You bowed from the couch, the moans and scratched to his shoulders done nothing but encourage. He lapped up your juices before diving his tongue into you and swirling around. You gasped, surprised and pleased as he worked.
“Col-“ You gripped his shoulders, lifting yourself from laying down, and he took full advantage, pulling you onto his face and fucking you with his tongue. Your body coiled, the jolts of pleasure popped around your body, and then you came. The white-hot energy surged through your body, and you panted, shaking, almost collapsing back on the couch. He caught you peppering the wet kisses from your pussy to your mouth.
“You good?”
“Better than.” You whispered, breathing heavily. “ Shit.”
“We’re not done.” Of course, you weren’t; his cock throbbed against his leg, waiting to ruin your life, and here you were still out of breath. Colson gently pulled you from the couch, sitting you in his lap, and he started once again with the kisses. You could taste yourself on his lips, and for some reason, that just made you wetter for him. He took advantage of stroking himself before he lowered you down on him. You took every inch, mouth slightly open and hair swinging the entire time. You pressed your breast against his chest, savoring the warm feeling of his cock inside of you, and then you started moving on him. Your muscles clenched around, gripping him with each stroke. Your clit rubbed against his pelvic bone; you took that added pleasure in stride biting your lip as it intensified every time your skin met.
Colson’s eyes were hooked on you, his fingers dug in your ass, guiding you up and down on his cock, urging you to keep going, and there was no way in hell you were going to stop. You could feel it building once again, this time bigger. “Hold it.” He whispered, knowing you were about once more. “Not yet.”
“Ah,” Impatience grew over you; you slowed your ride, winding your hips slowly, your eyes closed as you took over, fucking up into you, guiding your body to take more. “I can’t.” You whined as you fought to hold the orgasm back.
“Yeah, you can.” He slammed into you harder, knocking the breath from you, your toes curled, and you screamed as you shook against him. “I wanna feel that pussy shake around me when I cum; hold it.” He slapped your clit with three fingers, and your breath hitched. “Hold it.” His hand travels up your shirt to your bare stomach, and he kisses you once more. “Y/N.”  His hips rocked slowly, but then he started to fuck you quicker, the tip of his dick hitting your g-spot each time. You were a screaming mess, biting down on his shoulder. That done the trick he spasms against you growling. His warm cum triggered you. You came, sinking down and taking all of it. “Shit, you cheated.”
“You would’ve lasted forever.” You smiled lazily.
“Is that a complaint or a compliment?”
“Both.”
You wince, sliding off him, “right.” He rolled his eyes. “Now we gotta eat reheated Chipotle.” he stood up, fixing his pants. “Can I stay?”
“I guess.” You pulled the blanket over you, snuggling into your favorite place on the couch. He heads into the kitchen, and you reach for your phone, wondering what threat your sister had for you.
Meg: Are you still coming tonight?
This was not your phone; of course, it wasn’t. You unlocked the phone, clicking her name to look at the messages. But there is only red as Colson makes his way back into the living room. You throw the phone across the room, hitting the wall, and he stares at you. “What the fuck?”
“Take you and that Chipotle and get out.”
“Damn, what the Chipotle do?”
  A/N: One more part coming. I’ll drop it next week, I think! Thank yall for reading! Let me know what you think!!
Taglist: @taytayize123​ @ctrlszn @supernaturalvikingwhore @jae-writes-fanfiction @bigsisbria @placeoffreedom @kyla-queen @missdforever @gottatoxicattitude @bang-kim-bap @msreshel @blowmymbackout @titty-teetee @strawberry-skyes @mauvecherie @savageiz @bang-kim-bap @luci-her @littlelovebug98 @babyboy-cody @hellshedevil @daddyavesxx @crystalbaby12 @jeonsblackgf
commenters from serotnin who might be interested: @mgkmerchstyles @mayaslifeinabox
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roger-that-cap · 3 years ago
Text
doubt comes in
orpheus!bucky barnes x fem!eurydice!reader
summary: a retelling of orpheus and eurydice for an extremely late entry for a mythology challenge!!
warnings: uh- yeah i was not playing with this myth lol… fluffy beginning, uh, that’s all imma say about that and ALSO i haven’t edited this so haha, i am running on fumes but had to post this jeez 
word count: 11.3k good god
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There were gods that were unexplainably strong. There were some that could bend fire and metal to their will, some that could string up love and cast it upon others, and others that knew more of war and how to win more than they even knew themselves. Others were the faces of glory, like Zeus and Hera and the sun god Apollo and so many others. There were many that were worshipped by humans every day of every week, and others that were forgotten until they were desperately needed. There were some that lived immortal lives and demanded respect from humans and gods alike, and then there were the ones invested in their art, in themselves, in the beauty of life itself.
That was Bucky. He was so immersed in song, in the gift that he had inherited from his mother, Calliope, that it was all he could think about. It was what made him different, it was what made him stand out from the boys that he grew up with that were just plain old strong. He had a talent, he had a mother that was a myth and a legend alike, and he had a lyre. He had a lyre, a lute, his voice, and a bit of speed, and that was all that he would ever need in life. That, and a pretty landscape to look at while he strummed his golden strings. But that was all he ever thought he would need- which was why he was knocked right off of his planted feet when he saw you walk by.
You were a human. You were a beautiful girl, probably the most beautiful being he had ever seen in his entire life. He had met goddesses and nymphs and princesses alike, but never had he met someone who had such a sweet face, such a gentle aura, and even more, a beautiful voice. You had only said a few words to someone else that were delivered with a gentle smile, but he could have sworn that your words were a melody. Before he knew it, your entire being was stamped into his mind, and he knew that he would never be able to forget you.
It was by complete chance that the next day, he decided to wallow in his sadness by a fountain in public, strumming his lyre too quietly for anyone else to hear. Anyone who knew him knew that he was devastatingly off. And coincidentally, the only ones who truly did know Bucky were Steve and Sam, two forest nymphs that had been his best friends since he taught them the ways of the lute years and years ago. They were sitting by him in silence on the marbled fountain, waiting next to him for the second shoe that they doubted would ever drop. But then, like Bucky was a sunflower following the sun itself, his back straightened, his head perked up, and his mouth dropped, his eyes wide and swirling with admiration as he watched you- the same human woman he was enamoured with- walk through the square again, a woven basket full of fresh fruits on your arm and your lilac dress swishing in the wind.
“No way,” he heard Sam mutter, and Steve poked his side.
“You were always such a doubter,” Steve mumbled, but the smile on his face was audible through his tone. “There she is, in the flesh.”
Bucky could hardly hear anything but the soft melody stirring up in his mind, louder than his racing heart, and just as tender as the feelings swirling inside of him. He saw you wave to the older woman you were talking to and then start to walk away, and he knew that he couldn’t let you go, not when the Fates so obviously gave him a second chance. Without a second thought, he slid off of the fountain, leaving his friends and his lyre, striding towards you with the brightest smile, trying to cover the fact that he was nervous.
His clumsy feet were carrying him a little too quickly, and he could hear the snickers of Steve and Sam from behind him. He craned his head backwards to look at them and laugh too, but he tripped over his own left foot, barreling right into you and knocking you flat onto the ground. His half immortal heart beat heavy and hard in his chest as he watched you wince under him. He scrambled up, cheeks flushed and hand shaking as he watched you sit up and brush the dirt off of your dress. He was looking down at you with a look that he prayed wasn’t as desperate as he felt. But he had to know you.
“I’m Orpheus,” he started, and when you turned your bright eyes to him with your brows furrowed, he shook his head like he was trying to get water from his hair. “No, I meant that I was sorry- I’m so sorry. For knocking you over, miss.” He extended his hand to you again, and he swore that he saw your lips quirk up a bit at him. You took his hand and stood up, brushing the fabric of your dress once again. He caught a trail of your scent, and he was immediately overtaken by the scent of fresh flowers and lavender.
That was when he really got a good look at you for the first time. The first time he saw you had been brief. You weren’t even looking anywhere near his way, and he only caught a look at your stunning side profile before you walked away. His vision had been practically blurred from excitement while he walked up to you, and he was so embarrassed about crashing into you that he was subtly trying not to look in your eyes. But… damn, he had been missing out.
He swore that time stopped. His own heart stopped beating, even the sluggish beat leaving for a few moments. The noises from the town square were so dull that they seemed muted. The stares of Steve and Sam felt so far off that he didn’t even notice them. All he knew was that he was utterly entranced by you, and for a second, he could have sworn that by the look in your eyes, you felt the same way. But like the blaring of an alarm, something knocked you both out of it, putting you in the present, with present problems.
“Oh, the fruits,” you muttered, looking at the peaches and apples that tumbled right out of your basket, bending over quickly to collect them despite the fact that they had gotten bruised. Bucky’s heart jumped to his throat with guilt when he realized he had ruined the fruit you had either picked or paid for, and then he was rushing to get them even faster, praying to the gods that you didn’t automatically hate him.
After looking into your eyes, he doubted he could live with himself if you even so much as disliked him. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to, I don’t have the best footing,” he apologized again, gently placing the fruits back into your basket.
“It’s okay,” you said, and your eyes trailed behind him to look at his friends that were howling with laughter, holding onto each other. He saw your displeasure, and his heart dropped when he understood that you probably thought they had sent him over just to mess with you. Your eyes whipped back to Bucky, and he blushed something fierce. He felt his cheeks warm up under your scrutiny, and then there was a smile creeping back onto your face. “I'm Eurydice.”
Oh, Gods. Eurydice. He swore that he had never heard something so beautiful in his life. He had grown up with the Muses, even had a mother as one, and was surrounded by music and poetry and epics every second of his childhood. Music was imprinted in his mind, every note embedded in his everyday life, yet still it was the most beautiful- “But I go by Y/N.” No. Eurydice was now second. But your name, the one he knew you had chosen for yourself, was the most beautiful thing that life had ever offered him to hear.
His brain was going many miles a minute, as quick as Hermes on a mission, but all he could do in the end was blink and offer his true name first, like politeness called for. “I’m Orpheus,” he extended his arm again to you, and you shook it twice. Your hand was soft, so soft that he didn’t want to let go of it. He would never forget the feeling of your hand in his, and the way he swore that the nerves under his skin were alight with the gentlest and sweetest of fires. “You can call me Eurydic- I mean, Bucky. I’m Bucky.”
You could both hear the laughter coming from Bucky’s friends, and while you were cracking a small smile, Bucky was dying on the inside. “You like to be called by other people's names?”
“I wouldn't mind being called by yours,” he blurted softly, his words coming out as a quick and uncalculated slur. He blinked abruptly when he realized that he was truly having the worst first introduction he had ever had in his life, and it was the one that somehow meant the most to him. “I- only because Eurydice is such a pretty- so is Y/N- I… I’m sorry.” He shook his head, knowing that he was so close to just having to walk away. Instead of embarrassing himself further, he just gave you a short smile and waved, turning on his heel.
“I’m Orpheus, then. Maybe Bucky, too.” He slowly turned back around, a shocked look on his face. Had you really spoken to him again with your own free will?
Bucky knew that he wasn’t ugly. No god or demigod was ever ugly, other than poor Hephaestus. He knew that he had his own sort of charm and that he could bring the roughest of people to tears and the saddest of people to joy with his music, but he didn’t know anything else. He had three redeeming qualities that swirled in his head constantly- he was pretty, he had music, and he had a famous mother.
“Are you a singer?”
“Huh?” So much for eloquence.
You bit your lip. “You speak… you speak like you have a song in your heart. Are you a singer?”
He was stumped. Most knew at least of his music if nothing else. He was the most famed god or man to ever strum a lute besides maybe Apollo. Most knew nothing of his personality and nothing about him other than the fact that he was born to play and sing, and you didn’t? Where had you been living? “Well, I’m Orpheus.”
There was a grin on your face, and Bucky knew that he never wanted to see anything other than that for the rest of his life. “And that makes you a singer?”
He opened his mouth again, ready to talk about who he was born from and where he learned to play and who taught him, but when he looked deeper and saw the spark of mischief in your eyes, he leaned back and held back a small smile of his own. His heart fluttered and grew two sizes. “You know who I am, don’t you?”
“Maybe I don’t,” you said, obvious teasing in your voice, and somehow it still stayed kind. “Maybe I do, and just wanted a free song out of you.”
She knows me, he thought, and his heart may as well have let out a lovesick sigh from within the confines of his chest. She has never heard me sing before, but she will. I’ll sing her a thousand songs.
“I’ll sing you all the songs you desire if you marry me,” he blurted, and while his mind was scolding him for uttering those words so quickly, his heart was steady on beating and so sure of itself that he told his mind off.
To his subtle surprise, you didn’t look shocked. You weren’t disgusted by his rather bold approach and most importantly, you weren’t laughing at him. He held onto your silence in limbo, waiting for you to say something that would either crush him to bits or send his soul rising so high that he reached the cloudy gates of Olympus.
“If you can make me a song that can make the skies open up and weep without singing a word, then I’ll marry you.”
His heart soared. His hands shook. He could have sworn that even his toes clenched. But all you could see were his wide, boyish eyes, and the hopeful look that dawned across his face. He nodded quickly. “I’ll do anything.”
He saw your lips pull up into a smile, genuine and even a little shy, and he couldn’t help but want to step closer. But he knew he had already been up front and abrupt, and the last thing he wanted to do was scare you away.
“Okay,” you said, nodding your own head slowly. “I’ll see you soon, then, Bucky.” You took a step back, eyes still connected to his blue ones until you finally turned around and walked away with the same basket on your arm, same dress swaying with the tuneless song of the wind.
The three of them stood in silence, watching you walk away, taking pieces of Bucky’s heart with you in your cradled arms. The bustling of the town was loud, moving about like nothing of significance had happened right where they were all standing, and Bucky found it nothing short of insane. Did no one else just see how the world stopped turning for that one girl? How the Fates put a pause on the clock just so that they could meet?
Steve’s voice brought him out of it. “Did you just ask for her hand in marriage?”
He didn’t even have the energy to shrug. All the swirled in his mind was love, passion, music, and you. You, you, you. “I had to.”
“How will you even find her again?” Steve asked, his logic once again being the only thing that held Bucky down to the ground.
“I know the work of Eros when I see it,” Sam said to Steve, shaking his head somewhat fondly at the pale boy with brunette hair who was still staring off in the direction you left in, like you would miraculously appear again. “They’ll find each other again soon enough.”
The hours went by and then the daylight turned into night and back to day again, and Sam’s words couldn’t have been truer. Your spirit and your face and your voice found Bucky with every few seconds that passed by. He couldn’t blink without seeing you. He couldn’t listen to anyone without hearing you. He couldn’t breathe without smelling your beautiful scent. Everything tasted bland, looked plain, and sounded like white noise after he met you. He knew that until his last (and unlikely) breath, his heart would ache for nothing more than to be yours. He wanted his ring to be on your finger, and yours to be on his.
So he began to make a song.
§§§
He worked tirelessly. The hours below the sun that used to be spent laughing and playing with Steve and Sam were exchanged for hours of composing. His normally perfect posture was hunched over as he tried to find the melody that had stirred in his heart when he first saw you- because he knew that was it.
By the end of twelve days of pure struggling, most of the song was finished. He was a fast worker, so fast that it made everyone else’s heads spin, but he felt it was going too slowly. But then again, he was fast at everything. The melody was as stuck with him as his skin was to his body. He was sure that it would never leave him, even if he wrote a thousand more songs. And part of him never wanted it to go, because it was so you.
He had only held one conversation with you, and it wasn’t long enough, but he felt like he had known you for years. He felt like he had sung to you hundreds of times and danced with you a hundred times more. Your soul felt so familiar yet so foreign that he had to chase after you, and had to discover anything that he could have missed. He knew that you were his destiny, and he had a feeling that you knew he was yours.
The song he was writing wasn’t sad, but it brought tears to his eyes all the same. It wasn’t about longing or loss or chasing after something that would never come to you, but it made Steve and Sam wipe their eyes all the same. It was about your beauty, your inherent wit and kindness, and the way that you set his soul free from chains he didn’t even know of. It was about a love he had never dreamed of finding or even thought to be true, and that was enough to make the three of them weep.
“I think it’s finished, Buck.” This came from Steve after he wiped his eyes again, sitting through the full song again even though his heart aches for a love he had never felt before. “Sam thought it was done days ago.”
Sam had left the two of them alone days ago, claiming that he couldn’t stand to hear the melody and cry each time, claiming that it was beautiful but too much. It made sense. Even Bucky himself was starting to feel the effects of it. But Steve was a stubborn thing, and he would sit through it for as long as Bucky would play it.
“You think it’s enough to make the skies open and cry?” Bucky breathed out, loosely quoting the words he had heard from you not too long ago.
“Even if it’s not, it will surely win her over,” Steve said. “She was already wooed by you, you’re a fool not to see it. She was excited enough that you even agreed to make the song in the first place, anyway.”
Bucky sat there for a few minutes as his fingers tingled, expecting to be used again to pluck the magnificent strings. But he set his instrument down on the log he sat on, sighing and placing a hand under his chin, his thoughts trailing over to you for the thousandth time. “I hope she accepts it.”
Steve just looked at him. “I think that if you came empty handed and told her half of the words you tell me and Sam, she’d follow you anywhere.”
Steve was right. Steve had to have been right, or he was going to wilt right in front of you. He had to be. The brunet nodded, biting his pink lip before opening his mouth again. “Where do you think I’ll find her?”
§§§
It didn’t take long to find you at all. Bucky went to find you alone, finding you because something inside of him told him to search the flowering fields nearby, and there you were. There was a hat made of straw over your head to cover your eyes and face from the sun, and you had the same basket on your arm that you had the other days. It was empty this time, and he had no doubt that you were looking at the flowers for fun before going to look for fruit. He couldn't help but smile fondly at you from across the field, and then he was gripping his lyre and taking a deep breath.
“Y/N,” he called out, his voice full of emotion instead of being the strong sound he wanted it to be. Nonetheless, it caught your attention, and then your pretty eyes were wide on him. Immediately, your feet turned in his direction and you made your way across the meadow, and he followed suit. He met you in the middle, so nervous that the grin that was deep inside of him wasn’t coming out at all.
You were both at a loss for words as you stood close to each other. His hands shook at his sides, aching to hold your hands in his. He wondered if they were as soft as your voice, or as smooth as the petals flowers you admired. “You came?”
He blinked. Of course he did. It was all he could think of doing. “My only regret is not coming sooner,” he admitted, and he watched you angle your eyes downwards, and he smiled at your shyness. “Would you like to hear it?”
Your eyes were connecting with his again, and he could have sworn that your smile could have put him in an early grave. He was momentarily stunned by you and your brightness, so stunned that he hardly even heard what you said. “Of course I would.”
“So then you’ll hear it,” he said softly, his heart and mind completely taken over by you in your presence. He fixed his lyre into position, his fingers already fixed into the correct spots as he began to play your song.
His eyes were shut as he strummed just as he had practiced thousands of times, but he knew it felt different. His body was buzzing with excitement and something else he couldn’t identify, but he loved it. It made him play stronger. His eyes shut even more as he felt the music, swaying side to side a bit as he felt his heart open up to you, finally content with you hearing the song.
He didn’t even realize that he was done until all he could hear was quiet sniffles. He pried his left eye open, almost too scared to look for your reaction, but when he saw that you were just looking up at him with watery eyes and a wobbly smile, he opened his other eye, ready to spring into action.
The only thought going through his mind was that it was impossible that you liked it. The way you were looking at him reminded him of the way people looked at sculptures of ancient monsters— a muted type of awe, but also a sense of discomfort. He brought you to tears, and not in the way he wanted to. He ruined it.
“I- was it bad?” He blurted out, and he cursed himself at ruining his own chance. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry you didn’t like it-”
“How long have you been playing that song?”
You were too beautiful. Too gentle. You were melting his brain into mush, and he doubted that he would be able to pick up his lyre for another round even if you begged him. “I… I just made it. For you, I made it with you in mind.”
Your facial expression didn’t change. “Where’s the ring?”
He blinked. “I’m sorry?”
“The rings we’re going to wear when we wed,” you said, almost teasing. “Do you have them?”
His eyes widened. “You want to marry me?” He asked, leaning forward a bit in shock. “The sky didn’t- the rain never came.”
“I cried,” you said, a small smile on your face. You still hadn’t wiped your tears, and he watched them frozen on your face, stuck in time. “I didn’t expect the work of the gods. I just wanted you to play for me.”
He was bewildered. He had half of the mind to ask you if you truly meant it again, but he took his excitement and ran with it. “And you… you feel this too?”
You took his right hand into yours, and he swore that his souls ascended to the gates of Olympus and waltzed right in. “I felt it the second I saw you, Bucky.”
He blushed something fierce before looking down at the ground, shame overtaking his sheer admiration for you. “There’s something I should tell you before you say you want to be with me.”
“Tell me anything,” you encouraged softly, one of your hands coming up to brush his warm cheek.
“I don’t have much.”
And he didn’t. He had Sam and Steve and a nomadic lifestyle. He never stayed in the same place for long, and he didn’t have a roof over his head. He didn’t need one. Rain and wind and fire didn’t bother him. He preferred to live under the canopy of trees and the protection of nature. But he knew humans didn’t. He knew humans— especially women— liked when their partners brought things to the table, and he had nothing but strings and whistles. He had nothing materialistic. He had no gems, no coins, no house, and fancy clothes— nothing money could buy. But he looked at you and saw that you deserved it all, and even more he saw that he had no way to even provide it for you.
“I live in many different places, I don’t have a home. I don’t have money. I don’t have… I can’t buy you dresses or shoes or any of the stuff you would probably like… and I’m sorry. I know that will probably change everything, but I just wanted you to know.”
You took a step forward, strong and secure, and then your chin was tilted upwards. “Like I said, where are the rings?”
Bucky grinned.
§§§
The day of your wedding was blessed by the gods, whether they admitted it or not. You married each other in the meadow Bucky found you in with a small crowd of people, and when you kissed as man and wife, peace washed over the both of you, and it felt like your marriage had been approved by all far and wide. The kiss that you shared to make the wedding official was short and sweet and full of the most innocent of passion, and he felt so adored by the soft touch of your lips that he felt a singular tear cross the terrain of his pale face for the first time in years.
He didn’t even deny it.
He didn’t deny the way that you danced together was perfect. He had never guided you, had hardly even danced with another woman, but it was perfect. It was like he had practiced with you before a hundred times, and the feel of your hands in his was what kept him sane. He was convinced that you could do anything new with him and it would feel like you had done it before, just because you were so familiar to him as a whole.
He had known you for what felt like seconds in the grand scheme of things, but you knew him inside out and he knew you better than he knew himself. He could find you in the dark, you could identify him with just a whisper of his voice, and he could fall in love with you over and over without even touching you. He would perform the Sisyphean task of falling in love with you over and over again if it meant that he could be next to you.
And luckily, it turned out that you didn’t need the things that Bucky was sure you were going to. He got you a small house just for the two of you to come back to, and he still roamed around in the area. Steve and Sam would walk off and come back weeks later, just like they used to when it was the three of them together. And there would Bucky be, at the house he made possible for you, and happier than ever.
Bucky lived an extremely modest life with you, and he liked it. Farming and getting water from wells and working for the food that was on your tables, cutting wood to feed the flames in the pit in the middle of your main room. Life was somewhat repetitive, so repetitive that he was scared he would lose you to your wild imagination and beautiful, adventurous heart. But it had never been as fulfilling as it was with you.
The little things were what made his day. It was waking up with you at his side, tucked into his arms and still sleeping soundly while he made songs up in his head dedicated to you that made him smile. It was listening to you hum to yourself while you washed corn and peaches and squash in the buckets of water you had carried down the hill that served as your property. It was the way you would pull him out of a funk by taking his hand and leading him out of his chair, dancing to music that didn’t exist, or the way you would coax him to sing to the moon because you wanted a longer night. A longer night meant more time spent with each other.
When you woke up after your long nights, sometimes you would coax him out of bed for some daily challenge, a challenge that usually he would end up beating you at. Part of him believed that you just wanted him to show off, but you always said otherwise. You would challenge him in singing only to have him go first and not even sing, claiming you had already lost. You would tell him you wanted to race him to the stream and back, knowing that you would lose by a long shot. He could run circles around you if he hardly tried, and that was just in his godly blood. But there was never any jealousy, never any animosity, never any bitterness. It was all just sweet, it felt.
You were just so magical. It was so simple, the things that made him happy, but he knew that just one call from your soul to his was more than just communication. He craved it. He knew from the moment that he met you that his soul would always seek yours, even into the afterlife. He knew that every day with you would be as beautiful as you were on your wedding day, shining brighter than any gem or any star in the night sky. And none of it would ever change.
§§
Things changed. Just as the sun rose and set, so did time. It cranked on without a single hint of Bucky aging, and you were still as youthful as you were the three years prior. Life was still beautiful, and that was all that mattered.
You had traveled around the world with him, kissed in so many different cities with different kings and different cultures and different music. You had met so many different people, lived so many different lives, just to go back home and settle there. It was wonderful. He loved you, and you loved him. It was the kind of love that was never at risk of fading or thawing away. It was the kind of love that was only spurned on as the years crawled by, the days acting as twigs added to an already strong fire. It was such a beautiful thing that he had with you, and every day with you felt like one that was blessed by the gods themselves.
Until it didn’t.
Bucky had never felt fear in his heart like he did when he heard your scream travel across the meadow. He didn’t even put on his shoes before tearing off to find you, torn between begging you to make another sound so that he could hear you or pleading the gods to make the sound of your distress stop and never happen again. His chest rose and fell with the exertion, and he knew that he had never been so afraid in his life.
The scream was all that echoed in his mind when he ran through the woods, and as he stumbled upon fallen fruits and flowers that he just knew were yours. He realized he was at the end of a ravine almost too late, and when he looked down, following the steep curve of the slope with wary and partially-knowing eyes, he immediately doubled over.
There you were in all your fallen glory, legs bent unnaturally and neck twisted even worse. The light yellow of your dress was stained with brown and dark green, and in some places a deep red that made him sick to his stomach. Your eyes were looking up at the sky, staring right into the sun as it shone down on your figure, taunting him just like the breeze that began to make your dress look so lively.
Bucky fell to his knees right on the edge of the ravine, his heart not even lurching when he lost his balance. An arm reached out to you, like it was stuck in the moment before you fell and he could reach you. Tears were coming down his face slowly, steadily as he fought to get breaths in. He called your name.
He didn’t know how many times he called your name, or how far the sadness in it traveled. It must have been loud and long enough, because before he knew it, there were hands on his shoulders. They were warm and familiar and even the smallest bit comforting in that moment, but not enough. He wanted your hands.
“Let’s get away from the edge, Buck.” It was Steve’s voice, strong and gentle and the backbone of the situation. Bucky’s eyes pried open at the feeling of Steve’s sturdy hands pulling him backwards, and he retched in his mouth at the sight of your broken, soulless body at the bottom. He hadn’t even realized he had gotten so close to it himself.
“I’ll go down to…” Sam started, trailing off with a soft and distraught look on his face when he caught sight of Bucky again, and Steve nodded at him.
“Let’s get you up, Buck. Up and Washed off.” He hadn't even realized he was dirty at all. His hands were covered in dirt and under his fingernails were the same earthy brown he was used to. He had been pulling up grass from where he grieved without even noticing.
His sobs were so loud that they hurt Steve’s ears. His dragging steps were causing such a disturbance to the land around him that animals seemed to crane their necks at him and cast their glances his way, as if wondering how on earth a person could be that distressed. His mouth was moving, but it looked and sounded more like babbling and trembling as waterfalls came down the canvas of his pale skin.
“Buck, you have to calm down. You’re about to have an attack.”
He didn’t know if he meant heart attack or a panic attack, but it didn’t matter. All that mattered was that you were dead, all twisted up at the bottom of a ravine. Your soul had left the earth, left your body, and you were just laying there like you had never been alive. Like you had never held his hand, or kissed his cheek, or wore his ring or laughed or sang or read fine poetry while eating the fruits you had picked. Seeing you down there with your open and dim eyes felt like you had never lived at all.
“Keep walking with me, buddy. You’re going to be just fine.”
But he wasn’t. Every step he took away from you made bile come up in his throat. He wanted to be as far away from your lifeless body as possible, but he didn’t want to ever let you go. He wanted to hold you close to him until it felt like you were alive again. But as his heart beat seemed to freeze up but race like a horse all the same, he realized that you would never be alive again. You were only as alive as your last few moments, whether they were filled with the joy and freedom of having the wind on your face or the fear of falling. He could do nothing to change it.
But he would try to do everything.
§§
He spoke to everything and nothing. Steve and Sam would take turns coming to him after they celebrated your life. It reminded Bucky of the way that his mothers friends used to come watch him while his mother was off and away somewhere, and how it felt like they thought of him as a cute little burden. He knew deep down that his friends cared for him more than anything and that he cared about them just as much, but he couldn’t think about anything but you. He wouldn’t.
It was a service that made the skies open just like you said they would for his voice. The day lilies that surrounded you and Bucky seemed to be weeping with him. The wind came from east to west and west to east, spinning around and throwing in the scent of the flower with the smell of oncoming rain, reflecting the turmoil he was feeling on the inside. He could have sworn that the earth had trembled just like his hands that held your cold and still ones. But if the world had caved down under him at that moment, he wouldn’t have moved. He wouldn’t have opened his mouth to scream, or even say a word. He would have only held your hand tighter.
He spoke to the moon more often than he did Steve and Sam. They hovered, but it was the kind of hovering that Bucky felt he would appreciate sooner or later. He would sit every night and talk to the moon with his legs pulled into his chest, small and in such a vulnerable position that it would have made him feel uncomfortable at any other time. But he was vulnerable. He had been knocked off of his feet and winded. The world kicked him while he was down more times than he could count, and they had opened his chest and peeked right into his heart before seeing it was unworthy and walking away from him. It left him bleeding out in the forest while he listened to the birds eventually go on back to chirping, and watched the flowers push through and grow, and people laugh and smile and talk like nothing changed.
He was doing just that. He was lying in the flowering fields that he would always swear belonged to you, the both of you, when he heard soft footsteps. He didn’t care to look up. He knew it wasn’t Steve or Sam, but why would he care? He had nothing to be scared of now that you were gone.
“You’re Orpheus.” It wasn’t a question.
He didn’t even blink, but an annoyance he couldn’t shake bubbled up inside of him at hearing the name his mother granted him coming from a stranger. As much as he wanted complete silence, he couldn’t help but say- “Bu- sure. I’m Orpheus.”
“Everyone heard, you know.” The voice was of an old, frail woman. Bucky knew that without even looking, He ignored the fact that pity was strong in her voice, and that he knew exactly what she was talking about. He ignored the way he knew that she thought that she had the right to talk about his wife, about the way he had lost you far too soon. She knew nothing. But he let her speak. “I’m sorry.”
He didn’t say a word. He didn't even recognize words as an option. He would stay silent and wait until she left. Maybe if he was quiet enough or stared up at the sky in such a still manner that it scared her, she would leave him. If he pretended to be as dead as he felt, he was sure she would leave.
“There hasn’t been a good song since you’ve stopped playing.” He heard rustling, and then he dared to look off to the side to see the old woman struggling to sit, cane wobbling in her hand as she finally plopped her frail bones onto the ground near him. He sighed heavily and looked back up to the sky. “You know, you’ve gotta be the most moving musician to ever walk the earth, from both god and man.”
It was a compliment that would have had him blushing years ago. It would have had his young mind fumbling for his lute or lyre and clearing his godly voice, asking if she wanted to sing with him or just listen. Now, it incited nothing. It meant nothing. “I doubt I’ll ever play again.”
“You pleased god and man,” the old woman carried on, almost like she had never heard him open to speak with that raspy voice of his that was so uncharacteristic of him that it hurt to hear. “Anyone would have done anything to hear your music.”
He finally turned to the side to look the old woman in her face, and he blinked at her. “I’m grieving.”
“You could persuade anyone with seven strings and five notes, don’t you understand that?” Her voice was almost angry. It was hard and nearly pleading, so different from her previous tone that Bucky snapped his head her way. “If I were you, I would have been at Death’s gates.”
They were staring at each other. Bucky was looking at the decrepit woman with curly gray hair that looked like she had dodged a visit to the Gates of Death herself more than once with shocked eyes. His heart started to beat again, like her words were arousing some kind of vicious hope that he never even knew could exist.
“The gods blessed your union. They won’t ever say, but they did bless your marriage. What makes you think that if you beg, you won’t get a blessed reunion as well?”
She disappeared within seconds of her final words, leaving a revelation swirling around in his mind and haunting his every thought.
§§
His feet ached. His hands were beginning to blister from stroking the strings of his tired lyre, and his throat was even beginning to strain. He had been singing for hours, pouring his heart out at the hidden gates of the Underworld, begging for an audience. But above all the physical pain ranked the ache in his heart, the unbearable feeling of your death sitting on his shoulders and ripping him apart from the inside. His grief was destroying him.
Hades might as well have had ears plugged up with the same wax that was used by Odysseus and his men. Usually he went undisputed, because just as life was certain, so was death. There was no questioning the decision of it, or the Fates, or the rule of Hades and his acceptance of his dear Eurydice into his kingdom. Everyone was allowed to plead and beg, but no one ever went down to the gates of the Underworld to ask for the release of a loved one, whether they were man or god. But there he was, standing in dirtied pants with fingertips plucked pink, and tears running down his face.
He didn’t know if he would ever gain the strength to leave. He didn’t know what he would do if someone even bothered to humor him. He wasn’t going to be able to have you back. He was never going to be able to bring you back up above, have you under the sun and shining beautifully like you were born to do. What would he beg of them? For them to let him see that your soul ended up in the Asphodel Meadows? For them to let him hold you one last time before you drank from the Lethe and forgot everything that happened? What if you had already drank from it? Each thought made his stomach lurch more, and his music grew louder and more desperate, like the final battle cry of a warrior.
His back was up against a tree as he sang out again in the night, praying for someone to hear him and take pity on his poor soul. Strike me down and send me with her, if you cannot give me the gift of seeing her again. The same tears that had been steadily pouring down his face were gathered in a puddle at his unmoving feet, yet he didn’t mind. He couldn’t.
“You have woken my wife.”
Bucky’s playing stopped immediately. “What?”
The man before him was dark. He was tall and seemed to take up almost the entire space even though he was only a bit wider than Bucky. His shoulders were broad and his chin was strong, and his eyes were sharp even under the gloomy look they had to them. His cheekbones were sunken in and his eyes had a ring of black around them, like he hadn’t slept in a thousand years. His lips were set in a hard line, but he didn’t look displeased. Most notably, he had a dark aura surrounding him, even black most coming from behind him and nearly encasing him.
“I don’t repeat myself, and luckily, it looks like you heard me the first time.” His voice was deep, enthralling, like a song that Bucky would never dare write himself.
What was a man this terrifying, this powerful, doing in the forest? How had Bucky woken a soul when he was in soulless territory? He hadn’t seen houses for leagues.
Something inside of Bucky begged him to apologize. It begged him to get into his knees and look downwards towards the growing grass and hope to be spared. If this was before he lost you, maybe he would have listened to it. But what did he have to truly live for now that his darling was gone?
“I’m sorry to have brought you out of your dwellings because of my grieving.”
There was a certain kind of silence that would have made Bucky’s skin crawl if he even dared to look the being’s way. “Grieving?”
“My wife.” He breathed out, finally letting his arms loose as he let his trust lyre fall down to his side. “She… has fallen prey to death.”
“Ah,” the man said, his voice nearly a scoff. “I see. The circle of life.”
“And now my life shall go in circles, on and on and down the same miserable path without the woman I love,” Bucky stated, resting his head back against the tree. “I wish I knew a man that grieved. Me… I live amongst gods. We don’t grieve. We don’t die. I have never met a man who had an inch of grief in his heart. I feel like the first to ever feel it.”
“We can lose people in other ways than death,” the man said. “Death is the most absolute, but it seems to hurt a lot less than voluntary abandonment.”
“This is my first brush with death, and I have to admit that I’m not the biggest fan.” What an understatement.
“That’s a shame. My wife is quite the fan of you and your… grief. She says it’s the most moving thing she’s ever heard.” Bucky just nodded, eyes far off. “She wants to meet you.”
“I don’t really want to meet anyone.”
“You don’t want to see my wife? You don’t want a two way ticket to the world you’ve been singing about taking passage to for days now, Orpheus?”
His head turned slowly, eyes widening as he tried to piece thoughts and facts together with his sluggish mind. “What?” But he knew. He knew with another glance at this man that he was no man at all, but one of the original gods. He was Hades, in the divine flesh, standing right before him with a glint in his eyes that meant he was satisfied by Bucky’s shock. He went to his knees, kneeling as a sob piled up into his throat.
“Your Excellency,” he began to plead, recalling back to the times he was a young god, listening to his mother explaining the way that he should speak to all the gods who came before him- especially one as powerful as Hades. “I apologize. My mind is not set right— the loss of my wife has taken a toll on me. Please forgive me.”
“Your grief blinds you.”
There was no point in lying. “It does.”
“I, too, was blinded by grief. In fact, it happens every other six months, though I suppose you young gods and humans call it winter and fall. My wife would leave, gone with a stroke of wind and then come back only to wilt again. But she, just like your own wife, will learn that there is nothing we can do about the situations we are in. Destiny will have us where she has us, and your Eurydice’s path above has ended.”
Bucky wanted to scream at him. He wanted to refuse him and tell him that Destiny and the Fates would have to bend to his will, because there was no other way. He couldn’t last another day without you, let alone a lifetime. But the god he was speaking to was Hades, and Bucky was just Orpheus, a low level demigod.
“However, my wife still wants to meet you. She wants to hear your song clearly, where it’s not muffled by distance.” His heart began to race. His hands were shaking. His eyes were wide as he tried to take in a deep breath, waiting for the gloomy god’s next words. “If you agree to see her and play her that song of yours, I’ll let you see this wife you speak of. Does that sound fair?”
Nodding was all Bucky could do to stay awake.
§§
The Underworld was just as gloomy as it was in the stories. Black and grey ran together to create a shadowy world, dismal and dark. It was full of strange sounds, like the whistling of thick wind that almost sounded like wailing humans. The air was so heavy that Bucky was finding it hard to breathe, and there was a mist so hard to cut through that Bucky could hardly see more than three feet in front of him at a time. Hades led him, and the only reason he could see him was because of his true height showing, and the fact that his dark smoke was even darker than the mist.
His hands shook. Both of them held onto his lyre for dear life. It was close to his chest, strings facing away from him, but still it felt like he could feel the vibrations of it, like the air was mocking him back by playing a song of its own. He resisted the urge to close his eyes and fall to his knees, the environment putting him in near shock.
But he had to find you.
Hades stopped in his tracks, turning his sunken face towards Bucky, who had to fight to not flinch. “If you play for my wife and she likes it, I’ll take you to see yours.” He nodded his head quickly, putting his lyre into position, his arms trembling with anxiety. The double doors opened without the old god even touching them, and then Bucky was faced with an ancient throne room, elegant and dark all the same.
The first thing he did once he got near the sitting Queen of the Underworld was kneel. Tears were already swirling in his eyes, and his throat was lurching. If he were a human, he was sure that he would have been throwing up. He prayed silently to his mother, calling upon the strength of the Muses and their talents into his blood once more.
It was silent until the queen finally spoke. “So you’re the musician?”
“Yes, Your Excellency.”
“I expected you to be much older,” she said, her soft voice a plain contrast from her husband’s, and the dark setting of the Underworld. And then, Bucky understood that the stories weren’t embellished. At first thought, she didn’t seem to belong down there, least of all with Hades. He didn’t dare look up at either of them. “Your grief seems to be centuries old.” It felt like it was. The hole in his heart felt older than he was.
“This is Orpheus, son of Calliope,” Hades explained. “He can’t be more than a few thousand years, if I remember correctly.”
“Young, very young.” Persephone mused, the tone of her voice almost curious. “And what causes you to play this song?”
He explained it. He explained all of it. Your death, his need to see you, his stupid hope of bringing you back home where you belonged. He left it all on the table for them both to hear, even though he knew that the odds were unlikely for him. He didn’t care. He didn’t care if he got ridiculed or thrown back out of the gate, all that mattered to him was that he tried his hardest to get you. And that you knew, deep down in your forgotten mind, that he tried.
“Your music has moved me so, truly.” Persephone said, and then Bucky looked up. She was beautiful, flowers all over her body. She was the brightest thing down there, no doubt, and she still had that godly glow that all the other gods had, a golden rim around her body. She turned her face toward her husband without taking her eyes off of Bucky. “And I want to give you a chance.”
Bucky’s heart stopped. “Your Excellency?”
She was facing Hades now. “Give him a condition.” She muttered, her hands gripping the arms of the throne she sat on. “But let him try.”
Hades frowned. “If I let her go, how many humans do you think will hear of this tale and try to do the same?”
“None.” The goddess answered quickly. “They’re afraid of you. This boy is not. And unlike gods, humans accept death. They know that it is a part of the cycle, and they wouldn’t dare dispute it. This is just a confused young god. He hasn’t seen death before. This will be the only time anyone will ever ask this of you, Hades.”
It was pure silence. It seemed to stretch on for eons as Hades contemplated his wife’s words. The lyre had fallen to the ground minutes before, and Bucky felt himself reaching for it. Tears were streaming down his face now. “I’ll play for you again. I’ll play for you for a decade straight if you let me take her home at the end, if you let her remember me.” He added desperately, body trembling with anticipation.
Hades had dark eyes, and those dark eyes were full of uncertainty and something close to anger while he stared at Bucky, with a look on his face that was so blank that it frightened him. His wife’s hand was on his chest as she pleaded with him on Bucky’s behalf, yet he only stared Bucky down.
“If you can walk your way out of my domain without turning back to look at her, you can take her with you above ground.” Bucky sobbed. “If you look back, boy, she stays in the Asphodel Meadows.”
Bucky sobbed again.
§§
His back faced everything. He couldn’t hear anything except for the beating of his own heart, the heartbeat that seemed to extend all the way down to the fingertips that gripped the infamous lyre in his hand. He shook with every breath, and every blink was harsh on his eyes as he tried not to cry.
He wished he could hear you. He wished he could hear your soft voice reassure him, tell him that you remembered everything, that you were right behind him and that you would follow him everywhere, just like he would follow you. Just like he had followed you. He wished he could hear you.
He wished he could feel you. If your warm hands could just ghost over his shoulders and push him forward without quite letting go, he would have made the trek a thousand times. If he could feel your hands brushing away the hair out of his line of sight, he would have been walking before Hades even gave permission. He wished he could feel you.
He couldn’t. But he would walk anyway.
He hardly heard Hades give permission, his ominous tone echoing through the otherwise empty cavernous area, or the sound of Persephone’s whispers. But he could feel it in the air, suffocating and burying him.
Every lift of his foot was agonizing, every step far heavier than he ever imagined he could bear. But he would do it for you. He would push. Every whisper of doubt that crossed his mind, he would throw away.
It didn’t matter that at times, he wasn’t sure if you got what you needed from him. It didn’t matter that he felt like you weren’t fulfilled by the life you had with him. He had faith. It dwindled with every step, but he had faith. He would keep it and nurture it with every breath he had inside of him on the long journey back home.
Seconds started to feel like minutes, and minutes started to feel like hours. He hated it. His throat was closing in on itself like his voice was his enemy, like the voice everyone thought was so golden was the voice that would be the final nail in his coffin.
His feet were still aching, but the ache had become dull. Louder and more painful was the feeling of the cold biting his skin, like it was a reminder to stay conscious, to stay alert and thinking. Thinking was his vice and virtue. The silence was too loud. His mind was in pain, his heart even worse as he started to feel like the cold was his antagonizer. It was cold up above. It was in the cold where you suffered the most, where you struggled to stay positive. It was in the cold where he could hardly provide for you. It was in the cold where he had to hold you so close to him that air didn’t stand a chance between the two of you because every other man had already chopped the good wood.
But at the same time, he began to feel warm. It felt so warm to his skin that it felt like he was about to step into Tartarus. And it was in the warmth that you dressed in that pretty, short dress that got you harassed by men without humanity. It was in the summer that he found he couldn’t defend you. It was in the summer that he had a flash of realization that he wasn’t strong enough. It was in the summer that he got an even more fleeting flash of the thought that he wasn’t enough at all.
It was in the spring, in the months where there was sun and soft breezes, that he realized again that he was of no help. He had gotten a job one spring that was honest work, but brought in a lot less for the household than you did. He was working with the hands that were already calloused over to help men far more experienced than him craft things to sell to the town. He worked hard to come home tired just to know deep down that for all his work, he had not much more than chump change and a positive outlook to his name.
It was one autumn that he realized how much he had failed you, and he swept it under the rug like he did every other season. One autumn, he walked in on you crying in the arms of your friend- the local plum vendor that Bucky always used to buy from- about how you were terrified of being pregnant. As he walked through the Underworld, he asked himself how he could have ever forgotten that moment. Because what you said had shaken his heart to the core.
“There’s no way I would be able to take care of it.”
It wasn’t the certain doubt that was plants in your mind. It wasn’t the fact that neither of you had noticed Bucky hovering in the door because you were sobbing so hard. It wasn’t the way the woman comforted you better than he thought he was ever able to- because with him, you just never addressed the bad. It was as swept under the rug as dirt was. It was the way you said “I”. Alone. By yourself. Him and his contributions weren’t even in the picture. Were they even contributions?
It was never his voice that was his greatest feature and his worst. It was his mind. His mind was his killer. His mind was a killer, his poison and his weapon, and he was turning it right onto himself. His legs trembled as he fought the urge to look, to crane his neck and get his disappointment over with. Were you following him? Did you even remember him- or had you already drank from the river that would steal all of the life that you had before? Had Hades tricked him into leaving quietly?
And if you did remember him, why on earth would you follow him? You would be following him back to a land that was full of struggle and making it through day by day. You would be trudging after him this time only for him to bring up the rear in everything else. He would be the one smiling at you after you came from working to the bone, providing for him and yourself. That was all he ever had to offer, a smile and a song. What could he truly trade for a smile and a song? What could he get you?
Nothing.
What could he do if you got hurt again?
Nothing.
What could he do with his life when he surfaced and found you not there, far behind in the Underworld?
Nothing.
The doubt piled up. It replaced the faith like the faith was a forest and doubt was a wildfire. Every footstep added to it. He was convinced. He was sure that the result of him turning around at that one moment could be no worse than him turning around when he got to be above ground and away from the suffocating death. You weren’t going to be there. Whether he turned right then or in a hundred years, you weren’t going to be there. If you were in your right, beautiful mind, you would have seen him begging and turned your eyes from him and pretended like you hadn't known him.
He couldn’t tell where he was. His breathing was too shaky for him to think about anything else but breathing and thinking about you. It was too dark. His feet hadn’t touched grass yet and he knew he had to try to keep pushing, but he couldn’t wait any longer. He was bursting at the seams to confirm something that he already knew was coming for him.
His feet dragged. His steps sped up but it felt like he was fighting quicksand. He was struggling to walk through it, fighting to take breaths in it. The shallow breaths were somehow pitched high, bouncing off of the rocky, cavernous walls he began to hate. The only thing on his mind was doubt, doubt, doubt. It was a fever he couldn’t sweat out. A tremor he couldn’t shake away. A dark color he couldn’t paint over. A shadow he couldn’t run from. And just when he couldn’t fight it anymore, he saw light.
He never ran so fast in his entire life. He wanted to escape the feeling clawing at his throat and chest, the dread and preparation for pure disappointment. He wanted to step into the light, step into something he knew, before he allowed himself to collapse in grief again. It felt like the light was getting closer, and then it would fade again and come back lighter. He didn’t register the sound of sobbing until the sound faded out and stopped echoing, and then he was aware that his feet were touching the grass.
His feet were touching grass.
His hands shook as he raised them to his face, cupping his cheeks as he came to the realization that he was out of the nightmare that was the Underworld. Emotions were rushing into him faster than he could understand what they were, and then his mind stopped. His face was dry. His head whipped around.
Your eyes were wide and watery. Your dress was torn and bloody, just like it was when you had died. Your hair was a mess, and you were shaking from crying so hard. You stood there like a ghost, transparent and out of place, but crying real tears all the same. The sobs he had been hearing weren’t his own. They were yours. And you were still encased by the shadows of the Underworld.
You had been trying to catch up to him.
“Oh!” His exclamation was more of a dying moan than anything else. His trembling hands cupped his mouth again as he watched you cry again, crying even harder than that one time where the leaves were falling. He uttered your name once, and then once turned into four times, and as your cries got louder, his muttering turned into a shout, your name the one word he was calling out over and over again.
“I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry baby.” He watched as you opened and shut your mouth over and over, shaking your head as silence was all you could produce. “Y/N, I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry.” He was drawing blood from how his fists were clenched. “Baby, my sweet love, my darling,” the names were dripping from his tongue like honey, like it was a balm that could soothe the both of you. His apologies were just as tender, as quiet and disbelieving as the language his eyes were speaking. He couldn’t help but reach out to you with a dying apology on his lips, his foot crossing the barrier you would be stuck behind forever, and just before he touched what must have been your cold skin, there was nothing but air.
Nothing but your lingering presence and his poisonous mind.
§§
He never thought that life could be so meaningless. Even before he met you, he felt like he had a purpose. He was an entertainer, a traveling man, a man who brought joy and music with him effortlessly wherever he went. Not anymore.
He was empty, and he felt like an empty glass jar. He wasn’t even an empty box— he was something anyone that had eyes could see right through. Everyone saw him and knew he was the one who had lost a wife and in turn given up all his divine talent. They looked at him through lenses that were wet with pity. He hated it.
He hated himself for doing the same to the humans who had lost loved ones. He felt horrible for giving them those looks, for telling Steve and Sam their stories without really knowing it. Now he was going through the unimaginable.
Nothing mattered, he learned. He thought that thought over and over again every time he woke up and every time he was going to sleep. He thought it while he sat in the cold on one winter night with no fire in the fireplace. It was something that would have made him worry a bit, or made him irritated at himself. Nothing really caused him to get angry or sad anymore. He was just there. It was like he was living yet another death by extension. The world gave him his cards and he played them in the worst way possible. But that’s what he did. He couldn’t change it.
He couldn’t change anything. All he could do was pray that you forgot the way that he failed you time and time again, and then where it was most important.
He would remember enough for the both of you.
****
hi guys! i feel like i literally have come back from the dead with all the time i’ve been in and out of here. it’s been so hectic and busy that i’m proud i got this out so soon lmao- i worked hard on this, so if you were feeling it please like and reblog!!
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folklorelise · 4 years ago
Text
Please don’t go out with someone else.
Synopsis: How did squad leader mom met the captain and how they got together.
MASTERLIST; ASK (request or anything else)
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Your brother and Wylan, your childhood friend, always wanted to join the training corps. As you were only a year younger than them, you grew up with them constantly talking about joining the military – naturally, you wanted to join the military too. Your parents tried to talk the three of you out of this, but it was useless. Wylan always wanted to see what was outside the walls, therefore he knew he wanted to join the survey corps. Your brother tried to talk him out of this, but Wylan was stubborn.
When you finally reached the appropriate age to join the survey corps, you were beyond excited. Your brother and Wylan both waited another year so you could all join together.
“This is going to be so fun!” Wylan shouted the first day.
Out of the three of you, your brother was the best one – he was a great fighter, he was great with the gear and he was very obedient as well. Wylan was doing great – nothing exceptional but he could easily make into the top ten.
“At this rate, I’m sure the three of us will end up in the top ten and you know what that means?” your brother asked, “we could all move inside of wall Sina, and have a nice and peaceful life.”
“I don’t want to be part of the military police.” Wylan stated, “I’m joining the survey corps, no matter what happens.”
“Why would you do this?” your brother yelled. “Wylan, I didn’t want to bring this up but your parents –.”
“Yes, I know what happened to them.” Wylan argued. “I know they sacrificed themselves outside, they were both soldiers and having a kid was clearly a bad choice. That doesn’t mean I won’t join the survey corps too.” Wylan paused a second, “You think I’m stupid for wanting this.”
“No. It’s just that I want to grow old with you beside me.” your brother admitted. “And with you being in the survey corps, that won’t be possible.”
“I could visit –.” Wylan started.
“That won’t be possible because you might die outside!” your brother then looked at you, “you’re coming with me, right?”
“I might no be able to do that. None of us will if we’re not in the top ten.” you hesitated.
That night, before going to bed, Jesper, your brother, pulled you on the side so he could talk to you alone.
“Don’t mess up with tests tomorrow.” he told you.
“What?”
“I know you’re capable of doing the bare minimum, so you won’t have to choose. If you want to join the survey corps too, I…” he took a deep breath, “please take care of Wylan for me.”
“You could come with us.” you suggested. “You’re amazing, better than anyone else here, so why don’t you want to?”
“I don’t want to. I don’t want to know what it feels like to be in front of a titan and knowing that they’ll eat me when I can be safe inside.” Jesper worried.
“Please go talk to Wylan, I don’t want you two to fight. You’re both choosing different paths and you know, it’s ok.”
“Yeah. I should apologise.”
“Also, I will try my best to keep him safe outside.”
“Thank you.” Jesper smiled before leaving.
Without surprise, Jesper ended up being ranked first while you were third and Wylan fourth. Amongst the top ten, there was only you and Wylan who did not choose the military police. Before leaving, Jesper came to see you both to tell you goodbye.
“I’m going to miss you.”  Wylan told Jesper.
“I’m going to miss you too.” Jesper held Wylan’s hand tightly.
“Great,” you added smiling, “I mean, great to know I’ll be missed too.”
“I’m going to miss you too.” your brother smiled before hugging you.
“Yeah, anyway I’ll leave first because I feel like a third wheel here. I’ll see you later.”
When you finally arrived at the survey corps headquarters, you had a few hours to clean your clothes into your dorm before meeting everyone else on the training grounds to meet your future squad leader. You were beyond relieved when you found out Wylan and you were in the same squad because making friends was not your specialty.
“Hi, I’m Erwin. I’m your squad leader.”
“You’re really young.” you commented which resulted in Wylan punching you softly.
“I’m sorry, sir.” Wylan apologised.
“No, it’s fine. I worked hard for this post and I am proud of it.”
Later that day, you both met Hange.
“Really nice to meet you. I heard you two ranked top ten.” Hange said. “You won’t regret your choice, I’m sure it’ll be fun!”
“I’m Wylan, and this is Y/N.”
That night, you all drank and ate together – that is how you became friend with Hange, Mike, Erwin – your squad leader – and many other comrades.
Your first expedition took place a month after your arrival – it started great. There were only a few titans. Unfortunately, after a few days, it started to rain. At first, it was fine but when it turned out to be an enormous storm – it started to worry everyone.  
The order was to stay close to each other so no one would get lost. When the storm finally calmed down – you looked around and noticed a lot of missing people.
“Where – Where’s Wylan?” you asked loudly.
“Y/N,” Erwin held you back, “he might be with another squad somewhere else.”
“No,” you mumbled panicked, “he – he was just behind me. He should be here too!”
You walked away and sat down somewhere calm, hoping for Wylan to show up. The remaining squads arrived one after the another, each one missing some of their soldiers.
“Y/N, the commander arrived,” Hange said quietly, “let’s go.”
The expedition just started which meant that it had to continue. A few hours passed, and as you followed Erwin on your horse you noticed a few bodies sitting under a tree on your left.
“Squad leader Erwin,” you hesitated, “look.” you pointed at where the bodies were.
Erwin and the rest of the squad run to them. You pushed them aside when you saw Wylan was one of the injured soldiers.
“Wylan!” you sobbed, “Hey, it’s me.”
“Hey.” Wylan choked, “I’m… glad… you’re alive.”
“You are too.” you cried.
“I’m sor–.”
“No, it’s ok, we’re going to be fine.” you tried to hold your tears back.
“Tell him… I love him…” Wylan took a deep breath, “ok?”
“Ok. I’m sure he knows and that he loves you very much too.”
“Good.” Wylan smiled weakly, “thank you… for coming back...”
You stayed with Wylan until he passed away – then, the soldiers’ bodies were all put in the cart and as the cart went back inside the walls, you had to continue.
When the expedition finally ended, you headed straight to Wylan dorm so you could clean his clothes and other belongings. You sent a letter to your family and Jesper so they could come for the funeral the survey corps organised for all the loses.
“I’m so sorry.” you cried when you saw Jesper again. “When I – he was…”
“It’s ok.” Jesper hugged you. “It’s ok.” he repeated.
Your parents brought flowers with them – in front of Wylan tomb, there were only the four of you.
“I’m going to bring his things.” you said, “can you guys help me?” you asked your parents so Jesper could have some privacy with Wylan.
You had put everything in a small bag, except for Wylan cloak which you decided to keep. Everything else was giving to Jesper. Before leaving, Jesper spent some time with you in your empty dorm.
“Did you… did he said anything before…”
“He told me to tell you that he loves you.” you whispered.
You both stayed together, in complete silence before he got up and had to leave. You reluctantly walked to the mess hall for dinner and sat with Hange. They smiled at you and you both ate in silence too – no one really wanted to talk.
Years went by and at the age of twenty-four, you became a squad leader. Hange had been promoted a few years before you – everything was going great. Then, one day, Erwin brought in three new recruits from the Underground. After commander Shadis put them in Flagon’s squad, you left with Hange et Erwin.
“What did you do?” you asked Erwin once you three were alone. “Why would you bring three thugs from the underground here?”
“They could be an asset to the survey corps. You should go and see them fight.”
“They have zero experience; they had no training. Just look at how disrespectful they are!”
“They are better than some of us at using the gear with no training.” Erwin corrected you.
“We’ll pay them a visit later.” Hange said.
“Great.” Erwin smiled before leaving.
“I don’t want to.” you told Hange.
“Oh, come on, please come with me!”
On their first day of training, you and Hange joined Flagon. You were all talking waiting for them to arrive, but after ten minutes of waiting, you volunteered to go and look for them. The first place you went for was the changing room with all the gear you used.
“You’re late.” you stated when you saw Isabel still with her gear undone.
“Sorry.”
“Well, hurry. Also, where are your two other friends?” you asked, “doesn’t matter, I’ll go look for them.”
“Wait.” Isabel stopped you, “This gear is a little different from what we used. I don’t know how to put it on correctly, no one told me.”
You turned around and slowly walked to her and explained to her how to put it on easily and quickly. When Isabel was done, you both walked out, and her friends were waiting for her outside.
“Next time try to be on time.” you told them when you walked out.
“Sorry miss.” Furlan apologised.
“It’s squad leader Y/N.” you corrected him harshly.
When you joined Flagon, he was fuming – screaming that they were irresponsible for making him wait that long and that they should just go back to where they came. When they started to kill the wooden titans, you were all speechless.
“Oh my!” you shouted impressed, “Erwin was right.”
“I wouldn’t have mind having them with me.” Hange stated impressed as well. “Flagon, you’re lucky as hell.”
Flagon ignored you and left to talk to them while you and Hange were talking about how good they were.
“Levi’s the most impressive right?” Hange said.
“Hell yeah!” you agreed. “Now I just want to see them in front of real titans. Act cool.” you told Hange when you saw them coming back.
“You were awesome!” Hange shouted, “Even more because you didn’t receive any training. Right Y/N.”
“You were great, yeah.” you commented calmly.
The next expedition was announced a few days later – it would take place in a month and half. Isabel and you became quite close since you were in charge of teaching them how to ride the horses – Flagon traded with you. While you would do his work, he will do some of your paperwork.
Furlan was polite and nice – he was making a lot of effort to blend in like Isabel. The only one who did not try was Levi. You tried to talk to him multiple times, but he would never answer you.
“Oh right,” you said before they would leave, “this weekend you’re allowed to leave the headquarters so you can visit family or just walk around the market. If you don’t want to leave, I can bring things for you if you’d like.”
“Can you bring back some of the cake you had last time?” Isabel asked referring to the cake your mom had baked.
“I’d like that too.” Furlan smiled.
“Sure, I’ll send a letter to my mom. What about you Levi?”
“Bring me some tea. And not the one you have here because it’s disgusting.” Levi said.
“Tea? Ok, I can do that.” you smiled, “you know it’s the first time you ever said anything to me.” you laughed before leaving.
You went back to your room to write your letter asking your mother to bake some cake and gather some tea leaves. While you were in your room, the trio went to their usual spot in the roof.
“I like Y/N,” Isabel started, “she’s nice.”
“Weirdly nice to us,” Levi said, “you didn’t tell her anything right?”
“I didn’t!”
“I don’t understand why she is that nice though.” Furlan added. “She didn’t seem to like us at first.”
“She changed her mind, she got to know us better –.” Isabel defended you.
“We’re leaving soon so it doesn’t matter.” Levi said.
Two years ago, your parents had the chance to move inside of wall Sina thanks to their business growing. You left Friday night to your parent’s house. Jesper was the one who came to take you home.
Saturday morning, Levi found it odd that you were with them – because you would always greet them in the morning. They did not know that you left earlier the day before. Hange and Erwin noticed how Levi was looking around and staring at every new person entering the mess hall.
“You should go and tell him that she’s not here.” Hange told Erwin.
“You go.” Erwin said.
“Fine.” Hange went to their table. “Hi. I noticed how you were looking for Y/N… I think.” Hange told Levi.
“I wasn’t.”
“Oh, then never mind.”
“But now that you’re here, where is she?” Levi asked.
“She went home last night. She’ll be back in three days. No need to worry.”
“I wasn’t.”
Levi hated himself for missing you – he tried to convince himself that he wanted to see you because you promised him tea, but deep down, he missed your calm and joyful presence. You had a lot of baskets full of food your mother prepared which meant your brother had to come and help with it.
“Where is there a short man glaring at me like that?” Jesper told when you left the carriage.
“What?” you asked him confused.
Jesper discreetly nodded towards Levi.
“I don’t know.” you said.
“Well, I’m leaving you here.” Jesper said going back into the carriage. “You’re good, right?”
“Yes, I’ll see you soon, bye!” you hugged him one last time before he left.
There were in total five big baskets of food – you tried to take them all at once for more efficiency, but it was a failure. Levi from behind took three of them seeing you struggling.
“Thank you.” you smiled, “we should just put them in my room.”
You walked in silence to your room and once Levi put everything on your desk – he started to leave but you stopped him by grabbing his sleeve.
“You forgot your tea.” you let go of his sleeve. “Oh, I also brought you this tea set, because the one we have here is really old.” you explained as you gave him an entire basket. “There’s also Furlan and Isabel’s food in there.”
“Thank you.” Levi whispered before leaving.
Two days after you came back, Levi stormed in your room at night as you were ready to go to bed. When Levi saw you in a simple tee shirt and some short, he immediately left your room. You slowly opened your door only to find Levi still outside of your room.
“Are you ok?” you asked worried.
“Yes.” Levi blushed slightly. “Your mother, I don’t know how she organised her tea. I need your help.”
“Oh, okay,” you nodded, “let’s go then.” you closed your door.
“Are you not going to put on more clothes?” Levi asked you, “because it’s cold.”
When you noticed how Levi still would not look into your eyes, you decided it would be better to put on a long jacket.
You followed him to the kitchen, where he had prepared two cups and some water and every tea flavour your mother had packed.
“Each colour of bags represents a flavour,” you explained, “Mh, I thought she wrote on it which flavour it was, but I think with time she just stopped writing it – because she knew. What flavour you want to drink now?”
“You choose.”
“I like green tea, but it’s late in the night now so we should try something else. Like chamomile.” you thought.
Levi poured hot water into the teapot and you waited five minutes before pouring some into the cups. You sat in front of each other at the nearest table to the kitchen and drank in silence.
“Why are you staring at me?” Levi asked drinking his tea.
“I always like to look at pretty flowers and pretty things in general,” you said which made Levi raise his eyebrows, “that’s why I was staring at you.” you completed your sentence smiling.
Levi felt his cheeks getting hotter – he was speechless. No one ever before complimented him, ever so that was new. Meaning, he did not know how to answer.
“Are you okay?” you asked him, “you’re really red. Oh no, is it because of the tea?” you reached out your hands to touch his face. “Are you having a fever?” you worried.
“No, I’m fine.” Levi took your hands and put them on the table but did not let go of them. “Your hands are soft.” Levi said.
“Your hands are warm.” you smiled squeezing his hands softly.
You were both looking at each other when suddenly the door opened on Isabel and Furlan which made Levi back away from you.
“Oh, sorry.” Isabel said, “did we interrupt something?”
“No.” Levi said. “I’ll meet you in ten minutes.”
“Ok.” Furlan left with Isabel.
“You can go, I’ll clean this up.” Levi started to gather the cups and teapot.
“Ok, I’ll see you tomorrow then.”
Neither you nor Levi slept that night – it was not unusual for Levi, but for you it was. You could not stop thinking about what happened before Isabel and Furlan came in and neither could Levi.
After that, Levi would often make small talk with you when you were alone. He would often call you to drink tea with him before you went to bed. Then, a few days before their first expedition, Levi started to avoid you more and more which you did not find odd – it might be stress about the expedition. You were busy with your squad and paperwork. The day of the expedition, you went to see Levi because it had been a while.
“I’ll probably see you during the expedition though, but I wanted to see you before leaving. Good luck out there even though I know you don’t need it.”
Your squad was next to Hange’s and the expedition started. The few years after Wylan’s passing, every time it rained during an expedition you would start to panic and not be as useful as you would usually be. Surprisingly, the survey corps never experienced another storm during an expedition – it always happened before or after it. Therefore, when it started to rain heavily you started to be worried.
“Y/N,” Hange called you, “it’s ok.”
“Yeah.” you whispered, “no one walk away from me.” you ordered to your squad.
As the storm started, Hange’s squad and yours took shelter on high trees leaving your horses under you.
“Are you ok?” Hange asked you.
“Yes. It’s going to calm down soon, and it’ll be good.”
When the storm calmed down, Erwin’s squad passed on your way, so you joined them. After assuring him that no one was injured, you continued to ride on your horse. Erwin, Hange and you were leading the way, but very soon you stopped when you noticed all the blood on the ground.
“Wha – what happened?” you trembled. “Wh – who’s squad…” you got off your horse.
“That’s… the steam from the fallen titans.” Erwin said. “Are there any survivors out there?” Erwin yelled.
When you all approached the steam, you found Levi on his knees next to someone’s head which made you look away.
“Are you the only one left?” Erwin asked, “The corpses of these titans… you did this alone…?”
Levi stared at Erwin before tackling Erwin down of his horse. Mike, Hange and you took out your blades ready to defend Erwin, but he ordered us to stay back. Levi put his blade next to Erwin’s neck before speaking.
“Erwin, I’m going to kill you, you bastard. That’s why I’m here.”
Erwin showed Levi the envelope he kept on him and explained to him what happened.
“Why did you bring us into the corps?”
“Your military prowess…” Erwin started, “And to use you as partners to throw off Lovof…but now, it’s all over.”
Levi pushed on his blade, but Erwin stopped it with his hand.
“Who’s the one that killed my subordinates, your friends. Was it me? Was it you? Do you think that if you had come to attack me together that the two of them would have made it out alive?” Erwin asked, “No! It was the titans!”
Everyone else listened to Erwin’s speech including Levi.
“Fight with the survey corps Levi. Humanity needs your skill!”
The end of that expedition came sooner than you thought. You made sure that your squad members were doing ok then you went back to your room to clean up. You made sure to write a letter to your brother first so he would know that you were still alive and then you decided to go check on Levi.
“Levi?” you knocked on his door, but no one answered. “If you need to talk, I’m here.”
For the next few days, Levi rarely went out of his room. Furlan and him were the only ones sleeping there – meaning no one could bother him. A week after the end of the expedition, Levi came to your room one night.
“Levi.” you put your book down.
“You said… I could talk to you.”
“Of course, you can.” you sat on your bed. “I’m sorry for your loss.” you added as you saw Levi pacing around your room.
“I can’t…I don’t know what to do.” Levi sat next to you. “Whenever someone knocks on my door, I keep hoping it would be one of them.”
“I know…” you paused, “after that, you’ll feel anger.” you hesitated, “Then comes the guilt, thinking what if I was quicker or what if I made a different choice… maybe I could’ve helped. After that, you’ll feel sad. Eventually, it won’t hurt as much as it used to, to talk about them. It’ll get better.”
“How do you know it will get better?”
“It is terrible, but this probably won’t be your last loss. And I –… I lost my best friend a long time ago. It was our first expedition too…”
Levi and you were lying on your bed in silence.
“I can’t sleep.” Levi admitted. “It’s getting lonely in that room.”
“I can stay with you if you want.” you yawned.
“Sorry, I’m keeping you from sleeping – I’ll go.” Levi stood up but you held his hand.
“You can stay here. I don’t mind.” you looked at Levi.
You moved on the inner side of your bed so Levi could lay next to you. Levi did not let go of your hand when he laid down on your bed.
“Goodnight Levi.” you said before falling asleep very quickly.
“Goodnight Y/N.” Levi whispered looking at you.
Levi found himself getting sleepier and when he closed his eyes – for the first time in a long time – he fell asleep without any difficulty. In the middle of the night, you woke up feeling thirsty and noticed that Levi was sleeping. He was still holding your hand which made it impossible for you to get up.
You always have a glass of water ready next to your bed, but you were on the wrong side of the bed. You got up and tried not to wake Levi up or letting go of his hand and drank your water. When you went back to bed, Levi finally let go of your hand and turned on his side – his back against you. You took a deep breath before wrapping your arms around Levi.
Levi was the first one to wake up. You were clinging tightly around Levi which made it impossible for him to move without waking you up.
“Mh, morning.” you mumbled when you woke up.
“Morning.”
“Did you sleep well?” you asked still holding onto Levi.
“Yes, thanks to you.”
“We could do this every night…” you said. “if you want, because…” your cheeks started to heat up.
“Yeah.” Levi breathed.
After a few minutes of staying in bed, you both got up and brushed your teeth and changed into new clothes. You arrived together in the mess hall and when you saw Levi going to eat alone, you held his shirt back.
“Come eat with us.” you pointed at your usual table with Hange, Mike and Erwin.
“No, it’s fine.”
“They don’t mind.” you looked at your friends, “right?”
“We don’t.” Erwin smiled.
You sat next to Levi and while he ate in silence, you were chatting with everyone. Your friends noticed how Levi and you became a lot closer since that day:
-          Levi would often finish eating first, instead of leaving he waited for you to finish eating.
-          You would always come in together in the morning.
-          You would always leave together at night.
-          According to Mike, Levi smelled like you – logic since he slept in your room with you.
“Are they together?” Hange once asked.
“They have to be.” Nanaba said. “Right?”
“Should we ask them?” Hange said.
“You ask them.” Mike suggested.
“No thanks. Oh, here they come,” Hange said, “act natural.”
Everyone suspected you two to be together, but neither Levi nor you said anything about it. Levi and you both had feelings for each other, but no one was brave enough to make the first step. You acted like a couple without really being one.
Two months after this, Jesper paid you a visit which made Levi confused. He did not know Jesper was your brother meaning he thought you were going on a date with someone. At night when you came back, Levi took you to your room.
“I like you.” Levi suddenly admitted. “Please don’t go out with someone else.”
“I – I like you too. A lot.” you smiled.
“So… who was that man?”
“Jesper? He’s my brother!”
“Oh.” Levi looked away embarrassed.
“So, are we a couple now?”
“I’d like that.”
“Me too.”
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—————
Bonus about how people found out about it — Hange saw your two like this:
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355 notes · View notes
keysmashingfantasies · 3 years ago
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An Old Fashioned Meet Cute
A/N: hi! this is my first fic here and i hope you like it. comments and constructive criticism is very much appreciated just please be nice and i tried not to describe nor reader nor the Hilda character too much apart from the fact that they are plus size so it can cater to more people (altough the Hilda character is a white woman originally, I left that out because I wanted everyone to be able to read it) :D. and a huge thank you to @divine-mistake for encouraging me to make this blog and post my fics. ily Tay <3, this one's for you.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!plus size Reader
Word count: 2.1k
Summary: Bucky didn’t remember much of his life before the war. Not as much as he would like, anyway. But he was content to at least have remembered something. The memories of his teenage shenanigans with Steve always made him laugh. But there was a memory that he didn’t even know it was on his mind until that day when he accompanied Steve to the thrift shop. And until an Avengers party, where he met you.
-
“Steve, come on… Shouldn’t you be showing me the wonders of the modern world?”, he mocked. He knew Steve was doing his best, he did. But he knew that this wasn’t just a friends’ afternoon. And Bucky didn’t need a babysitter.
“I will! I just thought it would be nice to see something less overwhelming first and Sam told me a thrift store would be a nice place to start. Most of this stuff is new to us anyway”, Steve said, picking up a CD of a shelf.
“Yeah, ok”, he mumbled. The things he did for Steve. He mindlessly wandered through the little cluttered store, browsing the shelves full of knick knacks. He saw vinyls, old books, a great variety of toys, some paintings and an old fashioned vanity, with an old mirror, a few vintage perfume bottles, and… Oh.
“Steve?”, he said, picking up the old calendar that was propped up against the stained mirror. Carefully, he lifted the calendar up, looking at his friend. He had seen it before, he knew he did. He flipped through it as he waited for Steve to make his way across the store, careful to not bump in any of the tables containing delicate porcelain tea pots. His eyes scanned through the cover, a delicately painted picture of a curvy woman and with the saying “HILDA, 1940’s calendar” in bold red letters above it.
“Oh wow”, Steve let out a belly laugh. “You remember when we stole some of these? Man, we even took these to war”, he said. He started to remember. Him and Steve running, each one with a calendar in hand, flipping through the pages, Steve whining that he would never find a girl like that. He didn’t even think twice before taking it to the counter, with Steve giggling like a school girl behind him.
“For the memories, punk”, he said in a stern voice and a frown, but with pink dusted cheeks.
“Of course”, Steve said in a mocking voice.
-
“So, Tony’s throwing a party next weekend”, Steve said as he entered the training room.
“I prefer the thrift store”, Bucky mumbled, without tearing his eyes from the punching bag.
“Come on, Buck. I think it will be good for you to go”, Steve said. “It will be something small, Tony will introduce the new team assistant, so no eyes will be on you”, that got Bucky’s attention.
“Small?”, he said, pushing his hair from his face.
“Very”, Steve assured, but he had that look that Bucky knew very well from his young years; the look he would get when he was about to pick a fight. He was up to no good. But he didn’t want another trip to a dusty thrift store.
“Yeah, sure”, he mumbled.
-
You were shaking in your boots. Yeah, you knew that you would work for them, which meant that you inevitably would have to attend this kind of things. But this wasn’t like your former office jobs, no. You work for the Avengers now.
“You can do this. You have to. Do it for the paycheck”, you said, trying to reassure yourself as you shakily applied mascara. As you browsed through your wardrobe, you let out a sigh. You remembered shyly asking for advice on what to wear from Natasha, but you took it with a grain of salt. She could wear a potato sack and still look gorgeous, and you were… Well, a potato. You knew this was another test. If you couldn’t handle all eyes on you and the eventual bickering that was about to happen, you were not fit for the job. But damn, you at least expected a few weeks of taking care of documents and serving coffee before a party. In a room. With the, quoting the tabloid you read that very morning “super team that saves the world and looks hot doing it!”. You were a pretty confident person. But this… Anyone would be nervous.
“You can do this”, you told yourself one more time before heading out.
-
When you got to the party, not everyone was there. You politely greeted everyone with a nod, and gave your name to the ones you didn’t have the pleasure to meet yet.
“You, pick your poison”, Tony Stark pointed at you while walking to the bar.
“No, thank you, Mr. Stark, I won’t be drinking tonight”, you managed to say, silently thanking all the gods above (even the one that was sitting not too far from you) that you managed to hold back the quiver in your voice.
“She doesn’t want to be vulnerable around us. Smart, I like her”, said Natasha. Sometimes you wonder if she was a telepath like Wanda.
“Is there anything wrong, Y/N? I sense that you are uneasy”, asked Vision, with those glassy unblinking eyes. You wondered if he was in your mind that very moment.
“Gee, I wonder why”, said Rhodes, before taking a sip of his drink.
“I’m okay, just… A bit nervous, that’s all”, you said.
“Well, then you definitely need a drink”, said Tony, handing you a glass of champagne that no doubt cost the same as your previous paycheck.
Soon enough, the awkwardness made way to pleasant conversation. You laughed as you listened to their banter. It wasn’t like any business party you ever attended. No, it was more like a family gathering than anything.
The sounds of the elevator doors opening caught you attention as three men wide as refrigerators walked in, followed closely by a pretty young woman. Of course you knew them. You read all about them. Especially The Winter Soldier, the little devil on your shoulder taunting you by remembering you of every single time you talked to your friend about your crush on him.
“Sorry we’re late guys, Steve went to pick me up before the party and we had dinner”, said the blonde, linking her arm with Steve Rogers himself.
“Nah, Sharon, don’t cover his ass. We were late because the three of us had to wrestle Barnes into changing out of that old ass Henley”, said Sam.
Instantly, Tony and Natasha cheered and raised their glasses, making you laugh.
“Yeah, yeah, very funny”, said a gruff voice coming from the bar, making you turn your head, seeing Bucky Barnes open a beer bottle with his vibranium hand. 'How did he sneak past everyone?', your thoughts were interrupted as you took him in. You wanted to personally thank Sam, Steve and Sharon for making him wear that tight fitting black shirt.
“Well, Y/N, here’s Capsicle, Mrs. Capsicle, New Captain, and Snowflake. Guys, this is Y/N, the new assistant. Oh, and there’s Spider Boy but he’s on curfew, Strange had to hop out of the dimension and Scott but he’s… He’s somewhere out there being small, I don’t know. Watch were you step, just to be safe”, said Tony
“Hi”, you gave a shy wave, being greeted right back.
-
If it wasn’t for the serum, Bucky is absolutely sure he would have a heart attack on the spot. You were wearing red heels, a form fitting black pencil skirt and a white button up blouse and he could see your curves, your strong arms, your thighs. You looked absolutely amazing. You look like one of the girls that Bucky would’ve rushed to ask for a dance back in the day. But what really made him stare is the fact that your body type looked eerily similar to the character of the calendar he spent an embarrassing amount of time staring.
As your eyes scanned the room as you were bombarded with questions, Bucky made sure to avoid your gaze, looking everywhere but your face: his shoes, the ceiling, the armrest on the couch, Steve’s shit eating grin. Oh. So THAT’S what it was about. Little shit.
Even avoiding your gaze, he made sure to keep his ears open. A man could be interested, right?
.
By the time the party ended, Thor and Bruce were sleeping, Tony was buzzed walking around singing Iron Maiden, Natasha and Sharon were talking, Steve and Sam were giggling like two school girls, Rhodes went home and Vision and Wanda were talking and looking out the window to the New York skyline.
Which left you – and Bucky – alone.
“Uhhh. I guess I’ll start cleaning, then”, you said. Your face was on fire. The only person that you were sure didn’t like you and you were awkwardly standing, not knowing where to look and what to say. It didn’t help that you were attracted to him but damn it, you were not going to lose this opportunity because of a school girl crush. So you decided to keep yourself occupied by taking some empty glasses and bottles from the table and taking them to the kitchen.
“Oh, come on, Y/N! Let the cleaning crew deal with this in the morning!”, said Natasha.
“No, no, I don’t mind. I like to keep myself busy”, you said with a smile. Technically, it wasn’t a lie. You only hoped she couldn’t see how awkward you were.
“I’ll help”, he said, picking up some glasses and following you.
“You can pick up more of these glasses and I can start washing them”, he said. “I- I noticed you got your nails done, so…”, he said, and you shyly looked away while thanking him and making your way out of the kitchen.
.
In no time, the room was getting emptier. Vision and Wanda went home and Thor took Banner back to New Asgard. And you were almost done with the dishes, having also gotten rid of most of the empty food containers. As you both cleaned, you and Bucky got a bit more comfortable with each other.
“I’m sorry for seeming a bit standoffish earlier”, he said suddenly. “I’m not used to parties and I don’t know how new people will react to me. Especially pretty women”, you smiled at the compliment, but felt your heart ache. You were so caught up in your insecurities that you didn’t even consider his side of things.
“You don’t have to be sorry. I don’t know how you feel but by what I’ve seen and heard, you have a family here. You’re out there fighting to save the world. Trying your best. This is redemption enough, don’t you think?”, you said as you put the glasses to dry, missing the awestruck look that Bucky sent you, a goofy smile making its way into his features. “Okay, you wait here and I’ll get what’s left”.
You were back in no time. “Okay, so just more two champagne flutes and one plate left”, you said but before you could give the dishes to Bucky, you slipped, and if it wasn’t for Bucky’s reflexes, you would’ve fallen hard. You yelped as the sound of breaking glass hit your ears and for a second you two just stared at each other, before Bucky pulled you closer and back to a standing position.
“Thanks”, you said as he helped you straighten up.
“Your ankle, does it hurt?”, he said.
“Uh, no, I don’t think so”, you said.
“Ah, I think it does. And I can’t let a dame go home alone on a hurt ankle”, he said, giving you a dashing smile.
“You know what, now that you’ve said it, it hurts really bad”, you said, catching on. “You know what’s amazing for a bad ankle?”, you asked, and the gentle smile in your lips and the mischievous glint in your eyes made his heart piston inside of his chest.
"What?", he said softly, stepping closer, like you were sharing secrets.
“Ice cream and a walk on the park. Very therapeutical”, you said, making Bucky laugh.
.
Before you knew it, Bucky had already scooped you up into his arms and rushedly announced that you had slipped and fell, whisking you away into the elevator.
“Dude, that took all night”, said Sam. “This is the smooth guy you told me about?”, he said, while Steve and Sharon laughed.
While everyone got ready to go home, Scott came out of the kitchen in his Ant-Man suit eating some leftovers.
“Someone owes me 20 bucks for making her trip”.
271 notes · View notes
lightsovermonaco · 3 years ago
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His Good Sweater: Chapter 11 (NSFW)
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Masterlist
IT’S THE MOMENT YOU’VE BEEN WAITING FOR BESTIES! Thanks as always to @acollectionofficsandshit I think I broke her with this chapter! She also found  the song for this chapter so special thanks for that as well ❤
Word Count: 7.6k
Recommended song: “The Man Who Can’t be Moved” by the Script
The steam of the shower cleanses your senses and washes away the sweat from your workout. Crisp September air rushes through the open window and raises goosebumps on your skin as you step out. You turn off the tap and wrap yourself in a fluffy towel in an attempt to ward off the chill. A glance at the clock tells you that you have a half hour to get ready before your date picks you up.
Peter was one of the few guys in your major that paid you any attention. Most of them tolerated you at best but it had never bothered you. You were independent enough that you could make it through class on your own and google what you didn’t understand afterward and learn it before the exam.
It had been fairly easy to fall in with Peter and a few others during the first few weeks of summer classes. What began with group study sessions and quickly developed into hanging out one on one with Peter on the weekends to go to coffee shops or play video games.
When Peter had asked you out two months ago, Pierre's voice nagged in the back of your head. He asked if you were ready to move on from him and if you could really forget him.
The simple answer was no, forgetting him was impossible. No matter how many years passed, he would always own a part of you. 
Peter was sweet and he cared about you but you were quickly realizing the bond you shared with him didn't run as deep as it had with Pierre. He started as your friend and you really didn't feel right letting it develop past that. Although you had agreed to that date and plenty more in the time since, it still didn’t feel like a relationship. You had to stop yourself from imagining someone else's arm around you when you lounged on the sofa or someone else's lips kissing you goodnight.
You slip into a form fitting red cocktail dress and sweep your hair over a shoulder, banishing the memory. The person staring back at you in the mirror is a stranger, a ghost of who you once were. You pull your lips into a smile nowhere near as bright as it was months ago.
A knock on your apartment door startles you from your trance. Peter holds a bouquet of flowers, a broad grin on his face. He was handsome in a traditional sense, with a sharp jawline and playful forest green eyes that promised a good time. He was adventurous; a night in wasn’t in the cards. Everything was an event with him and you didn’t mind the distractions one bit.
"You look amazing as always," he says, stepping inside and kissing your cheek. You sniff the flowers lightly. Daisies were some of your least favorite flowers but the gesture was too sweet to point that out.
"So do you," you respond, gaze sweeping from his scuffed wingtip shoes to his crisp blue button down shirt. Ocean blue, washed out against Peter's pale skin, but would have looked perfect on Pierre's golden complexion.
You had to stop thinking about him. You saw him everywhere. On more than one occasion, you dropped out of a conversation when you caught a glimpse of blond hair bobbing through a crowd or heard a laugh startlingly similar to his. You couldn’t escape the idea of him whether you liked it or not.
"Are you okay?" Peter asks, touching your elbow.
God, you were so far from okay. Your mind was a melted mess of memories of a blond Frenchman and all the broken promises between the pair of you. This was pointless. You were wasting your time with Peter. He was great and should have been everything you wanted but he just wasn't enough.
"I'm so sorry," you start, handing back the flowers. "I don't think this is going to work."
"Oh thank god," he says, shoulders drooping as he runs a hand through his hair. "I've been thinking the same thing, I just didn't want to be the one to say it." You both laugh, the tension ebbing from your frame.
"Don't get me wrong," he continues, "You're amazing. There's just no…"
"Spark," you finish. "Yeah, I agree. Friends?"
You stick out your hand and he shakes it firmly. "Sounds like a plan. No hard feelings. See you in class on Monday?"
"I'll be there."
You slip out of your heels with a sigh, glad you don't have to endure that form of torture any longer. For the first time in months, you allow yourself to scroll through Pierre's Instagram.
Instead of being flooded with personal pictures it had become mostly posed shoots.it was the kind of thing that seemed staged, like he was only posted because his PR team deemed it necessary.
As time went on the content became more and more clinical. He was giving fans less of an insight into his personal life and focusing on racing content. You knew he had probably thrown everything he had into the season in an attempt to move on and you couldn't blame him. 
If his Insta was to be believed, he had earned a handful of podiums in the four months since you had mostly lost interest in the sport. After Austin it had been nearly impossible to watch a full race and you had instead been getting your biased updates from Max, who conveniently left out all but the barest details of anyone’s race weekend but his own.
There was no point in trying to convince yourself you no longer felt anything for Pierre. Just scrolling through his page reignites the flame in your chest that had been burning far too dimly for far too long. 
Heart pounding, you double tap a photoset of him modeling for Alpha Tauri, the lighting accenting his eyes. Their distinct, rich blue had always been your weakness. 
Your fingers find their way to the charm at your throat. You hadn't taken it off once since the gala. It was pointless to deny the sway he still held over you all these months later. Maybe it was time you stopped pretending you were fine and finally give in to the pull. 
The past few months have given you plenty of time to reflect. The media would hound you like dogs but at least while you were in London they would leave your family alone. And really, enduring their scrutiny was a small price to pay if it meant loving Pierre.  
“I’m an idiot,” you mumble, pulling up his contact in your phone. Breaking up with him had been the dumbest decision of your life. You’d watched him from afar as he traveled from grand prix to grand prix, touring cities and sleeping everywhere except where he belonged: curled up next to you in your tiny London flat, whispering sweet nothings in your ear until you both fell asleep.
You couldn’t bear it any longer. Fuck what anyone would say. Nothing could be worse than knowing your soulmate was out there and you let him go.
Heart pounding, you type out a text. I miss you.
Shaking your head, you erase it. How are you? Seemed more appropriate.
"Here goes nothing," you murmur and hit send.
**********
 It started off as any other free Sunday did: Charles and Charlotte arriving at his apartment carrying snacks and beer which neither of them would tell their trainers about tomorrow and plopping in front of the television to watch the PSG match.
The trio roared at the screen at poor calls and yelled when a goal was scored, all completely lost in the sport.
Pierre absently registers his phone buzzing during the last few minutes of the match but ignores it. PSG comes out on top and he finally checks it, nearly choking on the pretzels he was eating.
How are you?
Pierre has to read it thrice before he’s convinced it’s real. 
"Holy fuck," he says softly, tipping the phone so Charles can see. 
"Told you mate." He takes Charlotte's hand and stands. Football match completely forgotten, Pierre lifts a hand in a wave as the couple leaves. His eyes are fixed on the screen as he tries to comprehend the gravity your words carry.
After months of waiting in agony and wondering if you still cared, you’d texted him.
He had no idea how he managed to keep his feet on the floor. He was completely weightless, reading your message over and over again until it sinks in.
He takes the three simple words as permission to finally delve back into your life, immediately scrolling through your instagram to catch up. He double taps every post save for the ones with you and some tall, handsome guy. His stomach twists. 
Fuck it. Even if you just wanted to catch up, he'd take it. If you told him you were with someone else and you were happy, he'd learn to live with it. He was starved of you and was prepared to beg for crumbs of your life.
I'm fine. You have time for a phone call?
It was a leap but he acknowledged and accepted the risks.
Yeah. That would be good.
You pick up on the second ring.
"Hey."
Pierre squeezes his eyes shut, pushing back the lump in his throat. Years of memories rush over him in the space of a breath. The shock in your voice when you found out he was a driver for the first time. Your smile and breathless laugh when you met him in the garage in Brazil after his first podium in Formula 1. The tentative glances he had thrown your way for months after he finally accepted that he had begun to fall for you. The way your velvet lips felt when he made a gamble and kissed you for the first time. The drunken lilt of your voice when you told him you loved him that night in London.
Before he can stop it the bad comes rushing back too. The memory of the terror on your face when he let it slip that you were together sends a chill through him. If there was one moment he could change, it wouldn’t be the time he fucked up and lost his seat at Red Bull. It would be to keep his damned mouth shut at that karting track and preserve the bliss of that day and tuck it away in a bulletproof case that he could pull out and look at whenever he wanted.
"Hey you," he manages, silently thanking whoever is listening that he keeps the tremble out of his voice. "Been awhile."
"Yeah," you say sheepishly. "Sorry about that."
"You don't have anything to apologize for," he says quickly. "You never need to apologize to me."
You were the last one that needed to apologize for anything. He should be the one beginning for forgiveness. It was his fault you’d panicked. He should have fought harder for you, proved that he could make it work and save you both from months of heartache. But then again, maybe you had moved on. He couldn’t expect you to wait for him forever.
He doesn’t realize he’s been silent for so long until you clear your throat. For the first time he can recall, the silence is thick and heavy with unspoken words. It had always been effortless, the stories and words flowing like a babbling brook between the two of you. Now the confessions on his tongue remain poised there, too terrified to give them the light of day. 
"How's your season been?" He’s thankful you break the quiet first but the question makes his stomach sink. 
"You haven't been watching?"
"Not really."
"Oh." It made sense that you would distance yourself from him and that was fine, but he couldn’t pretend it didn’t hurt. "It's been decent. Red Bull wants me to come to Milton for contract discussions this week, actually."
"You're moving back up?"
"Potentially." Horner had only called him earlier that week to discuss the potential of him returning to Red Bull next year. The informal agreement was that if he could make seventh in the championship in a midfield car, they would bump him back for the following season. 
It wasn’t a concrete guarantee- that’s why Horner wanted to speak with him in person. He had a year left in his contract and being in a Red Bull meant he would be able to prove his worth to other teams and potentially secure a world championship worthy seat at a team that actually appreciated his talent.
He draws a breath before continuing, "I'll be in London on Monday. You know- if you wanna get together."
You stay silent for a touch too long and he panics. It was too soon. He should have kept his mouth shut because now he’d driven you away again. “Nevermind, forget I said anything-"
"No," you interrupt, "no, I'd love to see you and catch up. I don't have classes on Tuesdays. Have any free time then?"
His eyes slide shut and he exhales. The flack he would undoubtedly catch for shuffling around a few interviews would be worth it to see you. "Yeah. I can swing by your apartment around seven?"
"Okay," you say, a touch of excitement lacing your voice. "I'll make myself presentable."
"I-" he stops himself before the words can slip past his lips. "I'll see you then."
*********
Pierre blows out a breath and adjusts his backpack. He stands at the threshold of your building, keys in hand, unsure if he should let himself in. The dilemma had kept him rooted to the spot for nearly ten minutes now, weighing the pros and cons of his options. 
“Hey you, blond fucker.” Pierre whips around and is met by Daniel’s girlfriend glaring up at him from the sidewalk. She tips her head to the side to study him. Apparently he wasn’t the only one that had to cancel plans to be here tonight. “You gonna grow a pair and go up there or just keep staring at the door all day?”
“I’m going,” he grumbles, “are you?”
“Oh, I was going to but clearly whatever you have planned is more important.” Her grin splits her face ear to ear. “About damn time she got ahold of you. I was getting sick of listening to her gripe about you twenty four seven.”
“Didn’t she tell you I was coming by? If you guys have plans I can come back later.”
She waves a hand and dismisses the offer. “Absolutely not. Go get your girl.”
“She’s not-” The glare she cuts him snatches the words from his mouth. She makes a shooing motion before setting off down the sidewalk, munching on whatever snacks were in her shopping bag.
Pierre shakes out his hands and tries to gather the courage to use his key. The hopeless romantic argued that you would expect him to use it because you would know he still had it. The rational side of him butts in to point out that it might catch you off guard if he showed up without warning. He settles on buzzing your unit, your answer fuzzy from the distortion.
"Pierre?"
Even with the warbly static in your voice, his name on your lips is the salvation he’s been dreaming about for months. "Yeah it's me."
"Don't you have a key?"
"I wasn't sure if I should use it."
You don't answer, instead letting the buzz of the electronic lock do the talking. He takes the stairs three at a time, barely winded by the time he reaches the third floor. He doesn't even have to knock, your door swinging open as he steps up. The sight of you knocks the breath from his lungs. 
It didn't matter that you were in a simple hoodie and jeans, feet bare and hair swept back in a low bun. You are the most beautiful person he's ever seen and after months apart he nearly falls to his knees then and there to beg for your forgiveness, to get lost in you until two souls became one and he never had to live another second apart from you.
"Are you gonna stand there or do you wanna come in?"
God, he had missed your teasing jabs. His fingers ache for contact with your soft skin and he curls them into a fist to resist the urge. “Coming in,” he says softly, purposefully brushing your arm as he skirts past you. Every inch of him sings from the barely there touch, his soul aching for more.
Just stepping foot into your quaint flat has the weight he had been carrying on his chest for months beginning to ease up. Nothing beat the elation of being back where he belonged, not even spraying champagne from the top step on a podium.
Determined not to scare you off before he could have a proper conversation with you, Pierre opts for falling into the same humor you had used earlier. The corners of his mouth twitch upward. "Is that takeout I smell?" 
You nod, your cheeks turning a pale pink. “I got you two orders of beef lo mein. I figured you might be hungry.”
As if summoned, his stomach growls. “Yeah. I haven’t eaten since breakfast."
“Figures,” you say, eyes glinting with mischief as you settle into the plush carpet and pull a takeout box towards you. "I got it from that place across town, the one you liked best." Pierre perches on the edge of the sofa and snags the plastic tray with his name on it, eyes never leaving yours.
Now that you were mere feet from him he found it increasingly difficult to deny himself the relief of kissing you here and now. He wanted to trace his thumb over your lips before replacing it with his own, to slot his mouth over yours until time was nothing and he was no one other than yours.
You clear your throat and drop his gaze first, sending him crashing back to reality. “So, ninth huh? Glad to see you cracked the top ten.”
Pierre scrunches his nose and spears a piece of broccoli. He was shit with chopsticks but you always got a kick out of him fumbling with them. “Not where I’d like to be but I’ll take it. Horner took notice obviously, but I’m not getting my hopes up.”
“I think an invitation to Milton Keynes is enough reason to hope," you say around a mouthful of sticky rice.
This interaction was reason to hope. The fact that you were once again on speaking terms, that things were finally returning to some semblance of normal, was enough for him to believe that one day everything would be back to how it was before. That maybe, just maybe, he could hold you in his arms again and fall asleep to the soundtrack of your heart beating in his ear. 
Remembering the guy from your instagram, he scans the room for any sign of a male companion. Finding none, he asks, “How’s your boyfriend?”
It probably would have been a good idea to go about this particular line of questioning with a bit more tact. Inquiring so blatantly betrayed his inner thoughts, laid all his cards on the table. He didn't have it in him to care, not when his world might be turned upside down by your answer.
“Oh, you mean Peter?” You sip your water, seemingly working up the courage to explain. Each moment that the silence dragged on it became more of a physical monster. Pierre could feel it growing until it threatened to sink his claws in him and drag him deeper into the pits of his insecurity.
“If that’s his name, yeah.” Pierre braces himself for whatever comes next, reminding himself to be happy for you no matter what you choose. It would take time but he could put aside what he still felt for you and learn to accept your choice if it meant staying in your life.
You shake your head. “He’s a friend from uni. He’s not my boyfriend. At least not anymore.”
“Oh,” he says, frowning down at his food to cover the way his heart skips. “But he was?”
He had expected you to move on, if he was being honest. No way in hell did you deserve to be as miserable as he had been since you'd left- you deserved all the happiness he couldn't seem to give you and more. And if someone else had been the one to grant you that happiness, he should thank them. 
“For a little while,” you say softly, like it would cushion the blow. “It didn’t feel right.”
He was familiar with that feeling. Nothing he did felt right after the break up. Just about the only thing that kept him sane was telling himself that you’d come to your senses sooner or later.
And now that he was here, his world was beginning to right itself.
“Earth to Pierre,” you say teasingly, waving a hand in front of his face.
“Sorry,” he says sheepishly. “I just- I’ve missed this,” he says, picking at his food.
“What, eating subpar takeout in my tiny apartment?” You laugh and stuff another bite in your mouth. God, you could be so oblivious. It was one of the many things he adored about you. 
“I do. I miss doing anything that involves you, actually.”
There it was. His heart laid bare before you for the second time, waiting to see how you would respond. You set down your chopsticks and wipe your lips. His eyes track their movement as you whisper, “I’ve missed you too.”
Four syllables and he melts. It takes all he has to keep himself from sobbing with relief. It was everything he had come here hoping to hear. He couldn’t endure this again, couldn’t lose you for a second time-
“Don’t say that unless you mean it,” he pleads, body thrumming with the need to wrap you in his arms. “Don’t put me through this again unless you’re here to stay.”
He wasn't strong enough to tell you to stop. He would let you wreck him and he would be completely powerless to stop it. He would welcome it if it meant you granting him a sliver of your time. It would ruin him for anyone else but he didn’t have it in him to turn you away.
You rise to your feet and pad around the low table until you’re standing knee to knee, his neck craned up to study your face. You just keep looking at him, the leash on his carefully controlled restraint slipping as he rambles, “Because I can’t take it if you leave me again, I won’t-”
You simply nod, as if that’s all the answer he should need. But it’s not enough. “Tell me,” he pleads. “Tell me you mean it.”
He didn’t care that he was begging. He didn’t care that you had reduced his normally impenetrably stoic mentality to a jumble of you. If he was being honest with himself, you were the light of his life, the reason he pushed so hard for results on track. Everything had gone black and white when you left and racing had been the only thing keeping him from falling apart at the seams. The need to make you proud still propelled him forward even if he'd had no idea if you still cared.
So no, he didn’t care at all that he was practically on his knees. He would grovel at your feet for his entire life if it meant you’d grant him one more day to be with you.
“I mean it,” you murmur and place a hand on his cheek. He draws a shaky breath, leaning into you. Home, home, home, his head screams, acutely aware of every square inch of contact between the two of you.
“I’ve had plenty of time to think about it, and I’ve finally come to terms with it- your lifestyle. If I love you, I have to accept it being public. I have to build myself a shelter to withstand the storm, but I’ll make it big enough for two.”
It takes everything in him to keep from crushing you to his chest and never letting go. He had to ask, had to be certain beyond the shadow of a doubt that it was forever. “Promise me you won’t leave again if things get hard. Promise me we’ll get through whatever they throw at us together.”
“I promise. I’m not afraid anymore,” you murmur. Pierre’s head falls forward to rest on your hip bone, your fingers threading in his hair. “Daniel’s girlfriend helped me see that it doesn’t matter what anyone says. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I haven't been the same since I…”
“Neither have I.” His thumb winds under your shirt to sweep over your soft skin. “You’re safe with me, you know that right? I can protect you from whatever they say and you’re right, it doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is this-” he finally lets himself look up at you- “what we have. I’ve never stopped loving you, not once.”
Your smile is soft and tentative as you climb into his lap. His hands slide up your sides to pull you closer, refusing to let an inch separate you now that you’d bridged the gap. “I promise I’m not going anywhere. I learned my lesson.”
You lean down to ghost your lips over his brow, his closed eyelids, his nose. He can feel himself reconstructing under your touch, that final piece of the puzzle clicking home after being lost for so long. “I promise that I’m yours until the last star falls from the sky.”
He had lost four months of time with you. He wouldn't allow another second to slip through his fingers. 
Anticipating his movements, you meet him halfway. Fireworks explode as his lips finally return home and his world is finally, finally righted. Your nails scratch lightly at the nape of his neck, drawing him impossibly closer as your body moulds against his. He had nearly forgotten how perfectly your curves fit against him after all this time. He was determined to memorize every mountain and valley of you by the night's end.
His hands grip your thighs and he stands. Your arms automatically wind around his neck to keep from falling. He carries you to the kitchen and sets you on the edge of the island, never breaking the kiss. Nothing mattered outside of this apartment; not his career, not any baseless gossip, nothing existed beyond the space where your skin met his.
Pierre pulls back long enough to remove his shirt. Your fingers dance over his skin, relearning the planes of his chest like you had all the time in the world. And you did; he would stay here as long as you let him, reveling in the way you drank up every inch of his body like it was the first time you’d seen it.
“I love you,” you say as he kisses along your jaw.
How many times had he dreamt of you whispering that to him the past four months? How many times had it echoed in his head before a race, taunting him? He could scarcely believe his mind wasn’t playing more tricks on him now. He had to be certain it was real.
“Say it again,” he breathes. “Please. Please, tell me again.”
“I love you,” you repeat, punctuating each word with a kiss. “I love you Pierre, my champion, my heart, my everything.”
Pierre groans against your mouth, knotting his fingers in your hair and tugging your head back to expose your throat. He nips at the soft skin, not caring that he was leaving a trail of tiny marks in his wake. His focus was entirely on the gasps he was dragging from you with each touch, your heels digging into his ass and begging for him to be closer.
"My sweet, kindhearted man," you continue breathlessly. He didn't know if the words were for your benefit or his. "My best friend. My one and only love."
In that moment, you could ask him to bring you a star from the midnight sky and he wouldn't stop until he found a way to make it happen. You could ask for his last dollar and he would hand it to you with a smile on his face, completely enthralled with the way his name sounds on your tongue, professing that you still wanted him as much as he wanted you.
You were his undoing.
“Off,” he growls, tugging at your sweatshirt. You obey instantly and fling it aside, neither of you caring when dishes clatter to the tile floor and undoubtedly break. Your jeans follow suit after he helps you slip out of them. He runs his fingers over the delicate black lace of your bra and panties and pauses to appreciate that you knew exactly where the night would lead.
His cock twitches as you reach between your bodies to run a knuckle over his clothed length. “Your turn.” You undo the button with practiced ease, taking your sweet time as his breath comes in ragged gasps. He’d had a taste of you and hadn’t forgotten how you’d felt around him. He needed you more than he needed the air he breathed, his desperation taking over as he swats your hand aside and strips off his jeans and boxers himself.
He drops to his knees and grips your thighs, pulling you forward until your center is inches from his face. The yelp that escapes you is intoxicating, your hands flying back to catch yourself. His teeth sink none too gently into the flesh of your thigh and he’s rewarded with a moan before he flicks his tongue over the hurt.
Your head falls back and Pierre places one of your legs over his shoulder. “Mon amour,” he purrs, garnering your attention. Your head lolls forward and he waits until you meet his gaze to speak again. “You know I love you, right?”
“I never doubted it,” you confirm, lips curling in a smile. “But why don’t you prove it to me again?”
He pulls your panties aside and blows lightly. You groan, thighs tensing under his fingers as your toes curl and he chuckles. “Sounds like a challenge.”
“Do you really want to tease me?”
“What I want,” he says sharply, “is to have you moaning my name until it's the only word you know.” His tongue flicks out to dance over your thigh, dangerously close to where he knows you want him. “What I want is to make up for lost time.” He rips through the thin lace of your panties and lets the ruined scraps fall to the floor.
“Those were expensive.”
“I’ll buy you new ones.”
He would buy you an entire lingerie store if he could rip every set of it off you. He didn’t care how much it costed, it was never too much when it came to you.
“What I want most, my love,” he murmurs, smiling when his hot breath curls over your dripping cunt and you squirm, “is to forget everything else and stay here forever.”
You cry out when his tongue finally flicks through your folds. Pierre hums approvingly at your reaction, one arm snaking up to pin your hips in place. He sucks lightly at your clit and your fingers tangle in his hair.
“P-Pierre,” you breathe. He pulls back and you whine at the loss of contact. He grins up at you, the wickedness of it dragging the moan from your lips that he was after. He was drunk on the sound, desperate to hear it again and again.
“There’s my good girl.” He runs his tongue flat over your sex, savoring the taste as you squirm under him. You let out a choked noise when he repeats the motion before fucking you with his tongue, his nose hitting your clit with each stroke.
He doesn’t miss the way your lip wobbles and Pierre knows you’re ready to cry with frustration. He decides he’s tortured you enough for now and relents, putting two fingers in his mouth to wet them before plunging them inside you.
His mouth is spelling his name on your clit a moment later, your walls already clamping down on his fingers as your orgasm nears. In the handful of times he’d taken you to bed, he had already learned that when your head rolls back like that and your breathing stops, you’re seconds away from climaxing. He doesn’t let up until you’re shaking beneath him, finally slowing to work you through your orgasm without making you hypersensitive.
“Baby,” you groan breathlessly. Pierre slowly withdraws his fingers and wipes them on his thigh before pressing a final, tender kiss to your center that makes you jump.
“Use my name,” he demands, uncoiling to his full height. He grips your wrist and hauls your boneless body up, wrapping his other arm around your shoulders to keep you upright.
“Pierre,” you murmur and he grinds his hips against you in approval. He captures your mouth with his, taking advantage of your hazy mind to lazily explore it. 
You hum into the kiss, managing to wrap your arms around his neck and pull him closer. Suddenly the column of your neck is all he can think about and he wraps a hand around it, squeezing with enough force that you pull back with a gasp.
“Too much?” He murmurs, lessening his grip. Your brows knit together and your lower lips juts out, begging for him to take it between his teeth. He leans in and gives in to the impulse as he swipes his thumb under your jaw.
“Tell me if you want my hand on your throat, my love. I need to hear you say it.”
“Please,” you say finally. Your eyes are cloudy when they meet his. “Keep it there.”
He shows his approval in the form of a light squeeze. You angle your hips up, nudging his cock with your center. You reach a hand down to wrap around his shaft and drag the head through your folds, teasing him as he had done to you. The grip on your throat tightens to a point bordering blissfully between pain and pleasure, both a warning and an order to continue. 
If you knew how close he was to flipping you on your stomach and slamming into you, you’d call him crazy. Or maybe you’d like it, judging by the way your head falls back as he rocks his hips and inches into you.
You both moan when he decides the time for restraint has passed and he slams into you. You lift your hips to meet his with every thrust, clearly missing this just as much as he had. God, he’d lost months of fucking you, of feeling you clench around him and writhe beneath him. If he could stay like this forever he would, his hand around your neck and cock splitting you open as he laps up your moans like sweet candy.
“I’m- Pierre,” you squeak out, and he knows you’re barreling towards your second orgasm of the night. He pulls you up by your neck until you’re eye to eye and forced to look at him.
“Come for me,” he whispers, slamming into you again and again. “Come on my cock mon amour and I might just cum inside you.”
His words are your undoing, pleasure rippling from you in waves as your mouth falls open in a silent plea. He grants you no clemency as your cunt twitches around him, instead following through on his promise and following your lead.
You pants mix with his own as he struggles to keep both of you upright, his knees turned to jelly. Your head rests on his shoulder and he presses a kiss to your temple, slowly pulling out of you. A pitiful whimper escapes your throat involuntarily.
“I know,” Pierre murmurs, reaching over to start the kitchen sink. He wets a clean cloth and runs it between your legs, still supporting you as he doesn’t trust that your legs won't give out if he doesn’t. When it’s clear you can barely form a coherent thought, he scoops you in his arms and carries you to your room. He nudges the bathroom door open with his hip and sets you on the vanity.
The absence of his body heat makes you shiver when he goes to turn on the shower, adjusting the knobs until he’s satisfied with the temperature. He gathers you in his arms and steps into the tub, your sigh audible as the warm water hits your skin.
“Can you stand?” he murmurs before kissing your temple. You nod against his chest and he sets you down, keeping his hands on your waist just in case. You’re thankful for it when your knees wobble, a hand flying out to steady yourself.
“I’m okay,” you say after a beat and grin up at him. “I can stand, promise.”
“That doesn’t mean I’m taking my hands off you,” he says, grinning right back. “At least not for long.” He reaches over your shoulder for the shampoo and gestures for you to turn around. You obey, tipping your head back to wet your hair. A blissful sigh escapes you when his fingers meet your scalp, the cherry blossom scent blooming in the air as he works it into a lather.
Taking care of you was just as satisfying as the sex was. He cherished the intimacy of taking this small burden from your shoulders. The seemingly simple task was one of deep seated trust and it proved to him that your love ran bone deep. There was a level of trust in you letting him wash you that he didn't want to have with anyone else. It was reserved for you and you alone.
“Close your eyes,” he warns before guiding your head back under the water for a rinse. He cups a hand to your forehead to keep the soap from your eyes. Your smile is soft but unrestrained as you lean further into him until your back is pressed to his chest.
You both stay silent as he runs the creamy conditioner through the ends of your hair. His hand cups your jaw and tips your head back for a lazy kiss before he rinses that too and cuts the tap.
Once you're wrapped in a fuzzy white towel he finally dries himself off, fighting off a chill. He doesn't realize you're watching him until he turns around and notices you standing in the doorway.
"What?"
You push off the wall and pad back to where he stands to wrap your arms around his middle. His thumb traces patterns on your shoulder, perfectly content to stand there dripping on the tile until morning. 
When it's clear you're lost in thought he speaks up. "What's on your mind?"
"When did you know you loved me?"
"Like the exact moment?" He asks, caught off guard. You nod against his chest.
"When you visited me in Milan last summer," he says a few heartbeats later. That night insisted on making guacamole at two in the morning and woke me up because you couldn't find a lime. You told me you couldn't sleep because it was all you could think about after you saw that couple at the cafe eating it."
"Why then?"
"Because I knew I didn't have a lime but I was fully prepared to knock on every door in the building to find you one. Because in that moment all that mattered was seeing your face light up when I handed it to you and knowing that it was me that made you smile like that. I knew then that I’d do anything for you."
It still amazed him how a lime of all things was the tipping point. In that moment, a lime was important to you and it so naturally became important to him. If anyone else had woken him from his deep sleep he would have grumbled and told them off. But you, seeing your face inches from his, the light from the hall casting a warm halo around your frame as you whispered his name, he hadn’t cared at all.
"But then I found the juice in the fridge," you recall and glance up at him.
"Yeah, you did. And you felt so bad for waking me up- you had no idea that I had already fallen so hard that I had to keep myself from shutting you up with a kiss.”
The easy admission seems to stir something in you and you rise up on your tiptoes to press your lips to his. “I knew that time you sent food to my dorm at midnight when I was pulling an all nighter. I was studying for my calculus final, remember?”
Pierre nods. “I was in Barcelona. You weren’t answering your phone so I sent a message with the takeout guy.” He had been wholly enamored with you at that point, having quickly learned that trying to keep his feelings buried deep was an option that would never work. So he leaned into it, letting little bits of it shine through in hopes that you might pick up on it.
Your laugh rumbles through him. “It was the most thoughtful thing anyone had ever done for me. I hadn’t eaten all day. I was too nervous.”
“Took us long enough to figure it out didn’t it?” He untangles himself from you and leads you to bed.
“I’m just glad we did eventually.” You let him guide you to the mattress while he stays standing and goes to your closet. He hunts for the shirt he wants to see you in, praying you hadn’t gotten rid of it. He finally finds it tucked back in the corner and pulls it out, the cobalt blue fabric a little faded from how often you’d worn it over the years.
“I remember that,” you say softly as he returns with it and slips it over your head. 
It was the first shirt he had ever gotten upon entering Formula 1 and somehow you had wound up snagging it from his closet while he cleaned up the mess in the kitchen during that same trip to Milan. He had choked on his guac when you reappeared wearing it, eyes lingering on the Torro Rosso logo on the chest and his name splayed across your back like a claiming.
"I don't have sweatpants for you anymore," you point out with an apologetic wince. "I got rid of them."
Pierre just shrugs and hands you the shirt. "I have a change of clothes in my backpack. I was planning on working out to blow off some steam if…"
He trails off and you nod in silent acknowledgement. He didn’t have to voice the thought, you were already in his head and knew exactly what he meant. Unable to help himself, he kisses your head just because he can before retrieving his bag from the kitchen. "I have something for you," he says and lets the towel around his waist drop.
You let out a low whistle and grin at him as your eyes slide over every inch of his body. He takes more time than necessary to pull out his shorts, appreciating your gaze. You're still watching him as he slips them on and brings his bag to you.
"Do you wanna see what I got you or are you gonna stare at me all night?"
"I think I'll stare."
Pierre rolls his eyes and chuckles, plopping down next to you. "Close your eyes and hold out your hands."
You do as he asks but not before cocking a brow at him. Knowing the sound of the package will give it away, he does his best to draw out the first item as quietly as he can. The second he sets it in your hands a smile splits your face. He'd tear down the energy station with his bare hands to keep that expression on your face.
"It's candy." Your eyes open and you gasp. "Laffy taffy? But you can only get this-"
"In the states," He finishes. “I got as much as the store had.” The chewy, fruity candy was your absolute favorite and every once in a while you craved it. His backpack was currently stuffed full of it and various other packages of sweets, having been collected at every gp he had been to since Austin.
You tear into the package and dig for a pink one. You hold it out to him triumphantly and somehow, it’s that simple gesture that makes him melt. “You like the strawberry ones don’t you?”
“Yes baby, I do.” He lets you pop the sweet in his mouth - Pyry would certainly not approve- and grins at you. “If you eat too many before bed you won’t be able to sleep.”
“It’s still early,” you point out but don’t hesitate to set the sweets aside and cuddle up to him when he lays back. “Got somewhere to be?”
“I have to be at Milton by eight,” he says, wrapping an arm around your middle. “But you’re coming with me.”
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