#Only if you put those on - Trapper John | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

marley-manson · 8 months

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the topic is Trapper and the army as foils, you have three hours, go

In no small part the satire of Mash, particularly in the first half of the show, is tied up with gender performance.

The army represents traditional, stifling and violent masculinity. This is shown through everything from freudian jokes about guns (eg Frank and Margaret's flirtations in The Sniper or The Gun), to Margaret trying to cajole Hawkeye into performing a more traditional standard of masculinity while treating him like a soldier in Comrades in Arms Part 2, to many jokes and comments about (usually) Hawkeye not being a real man in contrast to army standards and various specific army personnel (eg Lyle in Springtime, Flagg in White Gold), to Frank and Margaret's worship of the masculinity of the army ("He's twice the man you'll ever be," re: Flagg and Hawkeye, Margaret's lust for MacArthur, Frank pursuing the sniper in The Sniper in an attempt to be a "real man" in Margaret's eyes, etc) to many jokes positioning the military as a sexually aggressive man pursuing Hawkeye ("Sure, the sun the moon the stars, your high school letterman jacket. Same deal I promised nurse Baker." "A receipt please, and promise you'll go out with other doctors," etc.)

In contrast, the main characters all fail to perform traditional gender in some way, from crossdressing to immaturity to indecisiveness to peacefulness to Margaret's masculinity and Frank's pathetic failure to live up to his own masculine ideals, to just about everything about Hawkeye. His cowardliness, his jokes about not being a real man, his jokes about taking the feminine role in sexual encounters with men and women, even multiple double entendres about his average at best penis size.

Trapper is the most traditionally masculine of the main cast. He still subverts masculinity in some subtle ways here and there, such as the occasional feminizing joke and mentions of not being in great shape, but overall he's the more butch counterpart to Hawkeye's fem. He plays the role of boxer while Hawkeye plays the role of diva in their respective manager/star roleplaying episodes. He's broader and buffer and plays football, often seen playing catch with someone while walking around the compound, while Hawkeye disdains sports and doesn't participate. He reads Field and Stream which Hawkeye derides in Alcoholics Unanimous while making a wry comment about shaving his armpits. A past lover nicknamed him Big John.

And there are many, many jokes about Hawkeye and Trapper being sexual partners. The recurring Uncle Trapper and Aunt Hawkeye gag, if my father sees this you'll have to marry me, for me? only if you put those on, your father and I will tell you what we did to have you, that's when I fell in love with him, etc etc etc. It's constant. In these jokes Hawkeye usually takes the feminine role, though not strictly every time ("Me and the missus," is one exception in As You Were, the dance in Yankee Doodle Doctor is another).

Trapper's masculinity is differentiated from traditional military masculinity in a few ways. Most obviously, Trapper abhors the military's violence. He never uses guns and mocks Frank's obsession with them, he's a healer rather than a soldier, and he's disgusted by the results of military violence on the men on his operating table.

He's also secure in himself. The military's brand of masculinity is strongly characterized by insecurity and overcompensation. Frank is the main representative of this military insecurity - a coward who insists he's brave (The Army Navy Game), a man who clings to a phallic gun to compensate for his sexual and gendered inadequacies (a main theme of The Sniper, perfectly mirrored when the army itself comes in with a vastly disproprotionately powerful automatic machine gun on a helicopter to shoot down one sixteen year old), a homophobe repressing his own attraction to men (As You Were, the original script of George), etc. We also see this in Flagg, who implicitly sublimates sexual urges into violence (seen when he suggestively caresses his gun while describing how he wants to torture a boy in Officer of the Day).

Trapper doesn't need to overcompensate. He's well-endowed physically, he's portrayed as a competent and considerate lover, he's a brave man who doesn't mind being seen as a coward, and he may or may not be attracted to men but either way he's not a homophobe (George) and he doesn't express his sexuality through violence. When Margaret proves herself stronger than him, his response is to be impressed rather than offended (Bombed). When he dances with Hawkeye for a gag, he doesn't mind letting Hawkeye lead.

He's also differentiated in terms of tradition, with the mliitary representing a more propagandic 50s traditionalism, and Trapper representing a 70s, countercultural freedom from tradition. We see this in the way Trapper has plenty of sex despite being married, while adultery is a court-martial offense in the military. It's notable that he's open and carefree about it, while Frank and Margaret are surreptitious and hypocritical in their affair. This lack of traditionalism is also shown in his disrespect for authority, often in direct contrast to Frank and Margaret's worship of it, and his allyship to George who the military would persecute for his sexuality.

So ultimately we can see that while Trapper and the military are both examples of masculine performance, Trapper's masculinity differs from the military's in being more flexible, less violent, less traditional, and more secure. The military's masculinity is far more toxic than Trapper's, particularly in the context of 70s counterculture media, which aligns womanizing with sexual liberation rather than a lack of respect for women, accurately or not.

This contributes to their respective dynamics with Hawkeye.

Hawkeye, we've established, is usually more feminine, and there are a myriad of jokes characterizing Trapper as his sexual partner, as well as the military as a sexual pursuer.

The jokes Hawkeye and Trapper make about their relationship tend towards cozy domesticity. They're Radar's "aunt and uncle," they directly roleplay marriage ("Martha, we're going to have to move, the people upstairs are impossible,") and less directly behave as though married (the bickering in Alcoholics Unanimous, the discussion about naming their pony in Life With Father). Occasionally they're treated as a healthy couple in contrast to Frank and Margaret's toxicity ("While I'm gone, promise you'll go out with other doctors," vs "Touch anyone else and I'll cut off your hands" in Aid Station).

In some instances the jokes lean towards predatory - "If you're trying to get me drunk, it'll work," or "Who is this man in bed with me?" "I followed you home from the movies," but they're always playful, always fond. If Hawkeye takes on a submissive or victimized role in these jokes, it's one he has fun with and discards just as easily in the context of the rest of his relationship with Trapper.

So, it's important to note that Hawkeye and Trapper support each other and look after each other in an equal, enthusiastic friendship. From Trapper ensuring Hawkeye gets to sleep in Doctor Pierce and Mr. Hyde, to Hawkeye supporting Trapper when he wants to adopt a child, to Trapper right at Hawkeye's side as they attempt to procure an incubator, they are there for each other every step of the way. If their relationship is a marriage in some ways, it's a healthy, strong, and non-traditional marriage, an equal and open partnership free of jealousy and insecurities.

Compare that to the military's relationship with Hawkeye. In jokes it's characterized as powerful and predatory, far from an equal partnership. Sometimes it approaches positive - in Carry on Hawkeye, much of the humour is derived from Hawkeye and Margaret's gendered role reversal as she assumes military command of the unit. Hawkeye playfully calls her sir, seductively lies on her desk like a secretary in a porn film, and most notably treats an immunization shot as sexual penetration in a prolonged gag about sexual role reversal. Hawkeye has fun playing a sexually submissive role to a representative of military authority in this episode, but it is a submissive role.

Several of the one-off jokes have a similar sensibility, such as the double entendre of "My bellybutton's been puckering and unpuckering all day," in response to a representative of MacArthur assuming their excitement over the general's arrival to the unit, or Hawkeye's "Okay, take me, I'm yours," to Colonel Flagg. They demonstrate a willingness to play the receptive role on Hawkeye's part, but they also, pointedly, disturb the object of the jokes.

When Hawkeye makes these jokes that sexualize military authority, he's attempting to be provocative as well as defiantly drawing disruptive attention to his own powerlessness as a drafted surgeon. The power dynamic between Hawkeye and the authority of the military only goes one way, and Hawkeye gets a kick out of pointing it out in ways that perturb the representatives of that authority, but it's a power dynamic that takes its toll on him.

Many of Mash's plotlines revolve around Hawkeye rebelling and attempting to seize some scrap of agency back from the military. Adam's Ribs, for example, in which he starts a mild riot over the food he's being fed and spends the episode attempting to procure barbecue ribs from Chicago (which Trapper procures for him), or Back Pay where he tries to charge the military for his forced labour. A particularly notable example is Some 38th Parallels, in which Hawkeye complains about being paid the equivalent of a nickel per operation, and his frustration manifests in impotency until he can perform a gesture of rebellion against the military.

One unfortunate consistency of these episodes is that the army ultimately retains its power. When Hawkeye achieves his goals, it's only in small ways that do little more than satisfy his own need to assert his sense of self. Often, Hawkeye doesn't achieve his goal at all, but is thwarted by the army, such as in For Want of a Boot. In every instance he remains powerless in comparison to the authority of the military.

So the context in which Hawkeye makes these sexualized jokes about the military literally fucking him is one of abject helplessness. In a sense, all he's capable of is pointing out what the military is doing and putting it in his own, audacious terms. He's not capable of preventing it. His jokes usually have an edge of bitterness to them in delivery, and when they don't, that tone is imparted anyway by the greater context.

With Trapper, Hawkeye can play-act a marriage or an assault, but in either case he's an enthusiastically consenting, equal partner. Trapper's performance of masculinity allows for Hawkeye to take any role from victim to wife to husband, and enables Trapper to respond in kind from a position of equality and respect. The military, in its insecure, domineering performance of masculinity, is a dictatorial authority, never allowing Hawkeye perform any role but a feminized, victimized one, and only ever giving him the choice of whether to perform with a wry smile or a sneer.

In short, Trapper is the cool, considerate service top to the military's insecure domineering boyfriend.

I'm tagging everyone who enabled this lol, share the blame. @beansterpie @majorbaby @professormcguire @rescue-ram

#mash #this was dumb but writing it was somehow cathartic for me lol #i should've done this with frank and hawkeye as foils wrt subverting masculinity bc i think that would've been much easier #but i got caught up in this honestly. it's incredibly fun to write this kind of shit #maybe i'll post a round 2 sometime #marley on mash #ship ht #mash gs #and like... it's a little bit parodic but also sincere to an extent lol. this is absolutely one way of reading all the freudian #undercurrents in the show. it's definitely silly to contrast trapper and the military to make a point about how the show depicts #masculinity especially for like 1800 words lmao but it's a very fun angle #trapper mash #hawkeye mash #long post

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boonesfarmsangria · 9 months

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Mike Farrell Reflects on Captain B.J. Hunnicutt’s Ahead of ‘M*A*S*H’ TV Special

Scott Fishman, TV Insider Dec 21, 2023 Updated Dec 22, 2023 0

Mike Farrell knew he had a lot to live up to when he joined the 4077th Medical Corps and cast of M*A*S*H as Captain B.J. Hunnicutt. The well-versed actor already had an impressive career including a stint on Days of Our Lives. However, this was a completely different kind of pressure coming into season 4 of a highly successful series after the exit of Wayne Rogers, who played Captain “Trapper” John McIntyre.

He was up to the challenge with viewers connecting with the devoted family man and what would be a long-time bond with Alan Alda’s Captain Benjamin Franklin “Hawkeye” Pierce. Viewers will ever forget the shot during the historic series finale where B.J. yells out that he left a note for Hawkeye. As he flies away in the helicopter, he soon notices that his good friend spelled out the word “Goodbye” with rocks on the ground.

It’s these types of iconic moments and characters that are celebrated during FOX’s upcoming M*A*S*H: The Comedy That Changed Television. Executive-produced by John Scheinfeld and Andy Kaplan, this two-special delves into the Emmy-winning run over 11 seasons through the perspective of the cast and visionaries behind the scenes.

Joining Farrell and Alda on the doc is Gary Burghoff (Cpl. Walter “Radar” O’Reilly), and Loretta Swit (Maj. Margaret “Hot Lips” Houlihan) to name a few, as well as series executive producers Gene Reynolds and Burt Metcalfe. Those who have since passed, including show creator Larry Gelbart, Rogers, Larry Linville (Maj. Frank Burns), Harry Morgan (Col. Sherman T. Potter), and McLean Stevenson (Lt. Col. Henry Blake) are spotlighted through archival photos and footage.

Here Farrell opens up about his emotional reaction to the special. The 84-year-old also describes what it’s like to see the beloved sitcom still resonate more than 40 years after it ended.

Michael Farrell

How often do you go back and watch the episodes back?

Mike Farrell: The popularity of the show continues to astonish me and thrill me, frankly. I get constant emails, and mail, calls to keep it fresh in my mind, and its extraordinary impact. I don’t make a point of looking for it on television, but sometimes it’s there. And when it’s there, I can’t stop looking at it and watching those people I love so much and care about. To see and remember who they were and what we did together. It’s something that will stay with me for the rest of my life. I’m so thrilled to be a part of it that it’s hard to put into words.

I remember seeing Alan Alda share a photo of you two toasting to the 50th anniversary of the show’s premiere. How is it for you to still have these close connections after all these years?

For us, it’s a family situation. We enjoyed working together and having this kind of bond that continues to this day. We talk about how much we love each other and stay in touch regularly. It has been something that brings an ongoing extraordinary rush of gratitude and appreciation for all of us here…Then you see David Ogden Stiers, Harry Morgan, Larry Linville, and others on the special. There is that sense of longing for somebody who you knew, loved, and enjoyed working with. It’s piercing at the heart when you see that sometimes. For me, I’m overwhelmed with the warmth that comes back from seeing Harry, remembering the relationship we had not only during the show but afterward. Watching Alan and his incredible wit and hijinks. Some of those things stay with me today. When I tell stories, I can’t help but get misty about those memories. It’s an everlasting love affair for me.

It’s fun to think about what would have happened if social media had been around during M*A*S*H’s original run. For example, B.J.’s mustache would be a hot topic of conversation.

People often ask me, “What do you think of the mustache?” I will say my mother hated the mustache. The mustache was a fun thing. Alan called me at the beginning of one season and said, “They think we are too much alike. What do you think about growing a mustache?” I thought it was a great idea. We made a lot out of it, which was fun to do. I wore what started as a red long shirt. Through many washes, it came out pink. I thought it was hilarious to be wearing a pink shirt in the middle of all that. I get many comments from people in the gay community who tell me they loved my pink shirt and ask if that was a signal. I tell them no, but that I’m glad they noticed it.

One of the topics that gets tackled in the special is B.J.’s character and moment of infidelity with a nurse divorcee. After all this time, I even saw a Reddit thread asking if B.J. cheated on his wife Peg.

I remember when I first met with the guys and they were talking about the possibility of Wayne leaving. I told them the one thing I didn’t want to do as an actor was come in and step in the boots of “Trapper.” They understood. They had in mind a fellow who was married, not a womanizer like “Hawkeye” or “Trapper,” who had a child at home. And he is going to be true to his wife and family. You’re talking about modeling fidelity on television, I didn’t mind that at all. We laughed. It stayed that way. One year we did a show where Blythe Danner played the guest star. She and “Hawkeye had been having a love affair in medical school, and she was temporarily assigned to our station. She was married, but the affair popped up again.

There is a scene where “Hawkeye” asks B.J. if he has ever been unfaithful. I said never. He said, “You ever tempted?” I said, “Tempted is a different question.” He said, “So, you have been tempted?” I said, “No, it was a different question.” It was a good gag. Larry Gelbart, who wrote the scene was ont eh stage when we finished that shot. I said, “Larry, that was wonderful, but let me suggest the idea. The fact B.J. is a faithful husband is great by me, but to suggest a man was not tempted goes too far. I don’t think we need to paint in that pristine manner.” He said that was a good thought. A year later Gene remembers that conversation with Larry. He asked, “What do you feel about B.J. falling off the fidelity wagon?” I said, “It depends on how you resolve it.”

How do you feel it came out?

I loved the whole process that they cared enough to hear me out, and decided it was worth dealing with that question. I thought they resolved it in a classy way. B.J. was upset about what he had done. It was brief and a misstep. He was miserable about it. “Hawkeye” gave him hell because he was going to write home and tell Peg. He said, “Don’t do that to her. If you must confess for whatever the transgression, wait until you get home where you can be with her and talk to her. I thought it was great that they were willing to explore the kind of experience people are put through in these circumstances.

It was almost like it didn’t matter how far they went, but didn’t matter. He would feel the same way.

Exactly. But the idea of them spending the night together in a bed, under those circumstances, and didn’t go far sounds a little stretch to me.

When was the moment you felt how big a show M*A*S*H was?

I was in Southeast Asia during one of our breaks. After my second or third year there on the show when I went around, I was astonished at the no matter what part of the world, the show meant something to the.m. This one man said, “Your show constantly underscores for me the meaning of peace and the need for peace in this world.” I came back to set and Alan and I were sitting together during the first day of the season back. I said, “Are you hearing what I’m hearing out there?” He said, “Yeah, we need to be aware of the way the show is affecting people.

We decided on a regular meeting as a cast and talked through the issues of the day. Alan and I both made it a point that this show is having an impact that is beyond just being a popular television show. We need to be seriously committed to making sure we do the best work we can do. Everyone got it and agreed and rededicated ourselves to commit to doing meaningful work because of the audience’s respect and appreciation for the show.

What are your overall thoughts on the FOX special while screening it?

I watched it with tears streaming down my face while laughter burst from my mouth. It was an extraordinary tribute. Not only to the show and people involved but the people involved behind the scenes. I’m glad they included the clip of Gene, Larry, and in particular Burt Metcalfe, the casting genius who brought many of the characters to the show; me included. He was a powerful force in maintaining the integrity of the show. It was deeply touching and I think the audience will love it. It shows the significance and the work of the characters and the way the show was built and what it became. I was thrilled when I saw it.

How do you think the show would do in today’s TV landscape?

I think it would remain a touchstone for people I can’t tell you how many veterans have contacted me. Even children of veterans. They would say. “My dad would never talk about his experience in the war until he saw your show. Then he would say, ‘That’s the way it was.”…That it has stayed relevant and meaningful to people for generations speaks volumes about the show.

M*A*S*H: The Comedy That Changed Television premiere, January 1, 8/7c, FOX

@stroyent 🤝

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remyfire · 1 year

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🎲 + traphawk?

(You get a kiss along the collarbone! Okay. I didn't mean for this to get emotional, but Hawk had a moment, and I had to follow him. AUGH. One serving of bratty-or-is-he Trapper and overly honest Hawkeye coming right up!)

"Okay. So what you're gonna do is ask nicely for what you want."

"Prick," Trap spits.

"Uh-huh." Hawk catches him by the chin and tips it down so he can look him in the eye. "And where do you like having my prick, Trap?"

God, there's something sexy as hell about seeing the way those sparks will spit from Trapper's pretty hazel eyes, how the more pissed off he gets, the more honey flows to the surface. The kind of boiling honey that would drip on Hawkeye's skin and leave a welt behind, but that he'd still be begging Trapper to lick off of him, even if the other man might dig his teeth in right after.

Trap makes it so easy to beg. But it's even more delicious when Hawk gets him to flip the script instead.

"Now you tell me," Hawk murmurs as he sits up straight, tall and slim, "what you want me to do, Trap."

"Blow me," Trap throws back at him in that exact tone that makes Hawk's cock twitch in his pants. There's a bite to it. It's threat, not begging. It's all to say that if Hawkeye didn't have him handcuffed to the supply shelves, he'd be grabbing Hawk by the hair, shoving him down to his knees, and smearing his slick arousal all over Hawkeye's lips until he opened up and took him all in one thrust. It's Trapper growling that if Hawk does get anywhere near his dick, he'll choke him with it.

It practically makes fireworks burst overhead, trails of flame falling to singe them both.

"I said," Hawk murmurs back as he reaches behind him and gets a hand around Trap's balls, "nicely."

"Not that time, you didn't." Trap gets to finish the sentence just before Hawk squeezes, and not in the gentlest way. The last word cuts off in a choked, tight throat, just barely avoiding a gasp.

Hawkeye quirks a brow. In that one elegant motion, he sees Trapper react, his cheeks flushing a deeper pink. They stare each other down, Hawk completely in control, Trap utterly spellbound by him.

Hawk shakes his head slowly. "I try to play nice with you. You know that? Every time, I'm ready to be sweet. Kiss you all over. Touch every part of your body. Fuck, Trap, I dream about putting my hands on you. But when we finally make it here and get you all locked up, what do you do?" He tilts his head, his hair falling across his forehead, the tickling strands making goosebumps skitter down his bare arms. "You turn into a loud. Fucking. Brat."

This time when Hawk tightens his grip around the weighty sack in his palm, Trap writhes, twisting under him with a whine vibrating behind his closed lips. That's it. There's the Trapper John he loves to see. Everyone gets their fill of the thoracic surgeon dancing his way through somebody's chest, or the clever-handed man tucked in the dark nooks and crannies of camp and charming a moan out of every nurse he gets his eyes on, or the dazzling doctor commanding a smile from every kid and villager that he saves.

But only Hawk gets this. Here's a man who has complete control over every aspect of his life, who has everything tucked into the neatest and tidiest compartments one could imagine, and yet he'll give it all up for Hawkeye. He'll let the reins be taken right out of his hands—but only if Hawk's brave enough to wrest them away.

Bravery comes in plenty of different forms. It's not all pointing a gun at somebody nor is it keeping your cool when the gun's pointed at you. No, it's taking risks that have little chance of gaining you anything in the long run. It's opening yourself up for the possibility that someone's going to take a bite out of your heart and leave you to bleed out on the ground. It's knowing that one day, you're gonna go home, and you have no guarantee that anything you seeded here will bear fruit.

"You wanna know the truth?" Hawkeye asks. He shifts his weight so he can remove himself from straddling the naked body beneath him, can move to sit on his knees right by him instead. As he comes down to hover just above Trap's mouth, he keeps his grip below the belt a dangerous threat. "I really thought you'd let me love on you tonight. I thought about it a whole hell of a lot during that last post-op shift. I had to make some shitty tough calls. Had to go back in on Private Nicolai. And the entire time I was working on him, I had this little part of me in the back of my head that was just waiting to worship you like I wanted."

Something shifts in those honey eyes, something that cools them to a lovely dark brown sugar instead, still sweet on the tongue, but less likely to scald him down to the bone.

Hawkeye considers the shape of Trap's face, the curve of his nose, the mouth so easily taken to smiling. He's seen this exact same pair of lips pressed thin together as Trapper read a letter from home, or as he accepted that he could never have saved that patient anyway, or as he held a crying nurse to his chest and knew he couldn't chase away the pain of losing a loved one back. Hawk wonders sometimes if anyone else has catalogued Trapper's mouth to the degree that he has, even his own goddamn wife.

"I thought to myself, hey," Hawk whispers, "at least he'll be there. At least he'll let me make this day something worthwhile, huh? At least he'll let me love him the way I need to. But. Here you are. Wanting me to break it out of you. Wanting me to be rough." Hawkeye nods slowly, keeps his gaze on Trapper's chin, on that tight dimple there that he'll fixate manically on sometimes. "And I can do that. And I'm gonna. And by the time we're done here, you're gonna beg—"

"Kiss me."

Hawk jolts to meet Trap's stare one more time. His heart flutters. "Say that again?"

Trapper gulps, then shifts a little, risking Hawkeye's hand tightening around him, trusting him. "Kiss me, Hawk?"

It's so sweet when he asks for it. It has nothing to do with the handcuffs and everything to do with how many times Trapper will flip over at the last second to be the little spoon when they're on R&R. It's that silent confirmation that the things Hawkeye will catch himself needing to give, Trap needs to receive them. That Hawk's not out of his mind with how badly he wants...he wants...

Hawk inhales deeply. He leans down a little further, brushes his lips over the arch of Trapper's clavicle.

Trap whimpers, the sound vibrating right next to Hawkeye's ear. "C'mon, Hawk, please—"

"You didn't tell me where you want it," Hawkeye reminds him on a husky breath.

"Everywhere," Trap pleads. "All over me. Head to fuckin' toe. But just...be a pal and start up here, huh?"

Pal. He's not even sure Trapper heard himself say it. But it's just a nick, like picking a perfect rose from a bush to take home. Hawkeye throws his leg back over Trapper's waist, reaching to cup his jaw with both hands, and the way Trap arches to try and meet him is beautiful in and of itself. "Where?" Hawk asks not unkindly, but firmly.

Trapper all but crumbles, brow furrowing, lips parting, panting for him. "Please. I gotta taste you. You make me goddamn crazy, Hawkeye. Kiss me on the mouth, why don't you?"

And because Hawkeye's been lost for him since that first fucking week in hell, he crashes down and gives him exactly what he wants, drinking up the almost pained moan that Trap lets free. The supply shelf clatters as he tries to get his arms around Hawk in turn, but in the end, he's forced to lay there, to take what Hawkeye grants him.

When Hawk finally pulls back and starts kissing his way down Trap's body, his rushing mind briefly catches on how he got lucky this time, being brave, pushing the bounds of what they let themselves talk about, what they let themselves feel. Maybe next time, he won't. Maybe he will have to break it out of him.

But right now, Trapper's begging him, on the verge of tears, needing Hawk even more than he needs air. And that's always worth the risk.

#hawkeye pierce #trapper john mcintyre #piercintyre #traphawk #m*a*s*h #my writing #ask meme answers

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serpercival · 4 months

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Fake fic meme!! Title: Headfirst and No Regrets

Ooh, this initially screams radarhawk to me, but given my Terminal Diseases I'm inevitably spinning it as radartraphawk.

"Radar's been pining something fierce after Hawkeye ever since they first got to this dump. Who wouldn't? He's smart, he's funny, he's sweet on the people he cares about... and he's almost definitely not interested in Radar, because why would he be when he's got plenty of nurses and Trapper John to choose from?

"One day, everything comes to a head when Radar shows up with the mail to find Hawkeye and Trapper together, and Radar gets the feeling that maybe he's not so unwelcome after all."

Tagging @bbjkrss-blog with the assumption he'll want to see this - about 450 words of what would be the beginning of this fic under the cut <3

Radar wasn’t really paying attention when he started heading for the Swamp with the mail for Hawkeye and Trapper. He never paid all that much attention to the Swamp except for if Major Burns was going to be there, given that Hawkeye and Trapper were almost always happy to see him because they were so bored all the time they weren’t in surgery. So when he walked in, shuffling through the little pile of mail in his hands so he could separate what was for Ben Pierce with what was for John McIntyre, he didn’t notice that the tent flaps were down, he didn’t notice the electric charge in the air, and he didn’t notice that Hawkeye and Trapper were in the same cot and didn’t actually have any clothes on until the sickly bolt of someone else’s panic shot through him.

He looked up. Trapper had put himself directly between Hawkeye and Radar, covering himself with only a pillow and nothing else, which made Radar have an awful lot of thoughts that he didn’t really like to admit to having, and Hawkeye was half under a blanket and squished against the tent wall behind him.

“Radar,” Trapper said, and it still managed to be threatening even though he was really awful naked and his mouth was wet and swollen in a way that gave Radar a spark of the image of exactly what they’d been doing before he wandered in. “You didn’t see nothin’ here, did you?”

Radar shook his head slowly, carefully. Little movements. Like not scaring off a wild animal. “No, sir.”

Hawkeye tried to kick Trapper to get him to stop squishing him. Trapper just whacked him on the shin and narrowed his eyes at Radar. “Scram.”

“Alright, sir,” Radar said. His feet didn’t want to move. He could practically hear the noises Hawkeye would have been making, with Trapper’s lips on the place he thought they probably had been. It was exciting and terrifying and all sorts of things that Radar knew a good Christian boy wasn’t supposed to think about, but then again neither Trapper or Hawkeye seemed to think that He was paying an awful lot of attention to Korea.

“Radar,” Hawkeye said. “Vamoose. Go away. Abscond, skedaddle, scuttle off–”

“You ever thought about doing that with me?” something with Radar’s mouth asked.

Trapper and Hawkeye looked at each other. “Uh,” Hawkeye said. They gave each other one of those glances that sometimes made Radar feel like he wasn’t the only one with the kind of head he had, before they both turned back. Hawkeye shrugged. “Maybe a little?”

#serpercival writes #ask games #fake fic ask meme #radartraphawk

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quordleona03 · 1 year

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Trapper Tuesday

Six lines from a WIP

John's office was tiny and windowless. There was only one chair. They were standing very close together. Suddenly, Trapper put his hands on Mulcahy and started unbuttoning his shirt. Mulcahy jerked away, winced, and stared at Trapper, who had taken a step back - the office was no bigger than that - and was leaning against the door. John McIntyre, not Trapper. And John looked apologetic. Mulcahy realised, embarrassed, he had misinterpreted - overreacted - but those hands had come at him so swiftly and expertly - "What?" he asked, bewildered. "Sorry. You weren't facing me. What I said was," John spoke slowly, "I could see you had cracked your ribs, or maybe your arm? I want to check you out before I call Hawkeye and tell him you're all right. What happened?"

What indeed?

#francis mulcahy #mash tv #my wips #trapper john mcintyre #trapper tuesday

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clingtomefic · 3 months

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Smut ABCs

Cling to Me: Dr. Trapper John McIntyre

Disclaimer, this is for a specific fic I'm working on.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Trapper secretly loves it when he partner passes out on him, especially if they’re still entangled/he’s still inside. He loves it when they latch onto him, he loves it when his arm is asleep and he can’t move because partner(s). He’s one of those guys who’ll go through top-drop if he’s left alone after sex without reason. It’s the only ‘clingy’ trait he’s got and he’s never talked about it with anyone, he finds it worrisome in himself.

B = Body part (favorite body part of their partner’s)

Trapper thinks Max has a perfect cock. Like, the kind they model toys after, you know, when a guys drops his pants and you’re like “Fuck, that’s pretty.” Yeah. Now that he’s compulsively started there, you can’t really move any direction without finding something Trapper’s orally fixated on. His hips, his legs, god his ass, and then like, his belly? Have you…Have you looked at him, I mean just look, that’s…that’s the argument. That’s Trapper’s case. Doing the Will Smith Wife gesture at all of him.

And oh fucking hell, when he puts the…puts the drag on, right with the dresses and make-up? Trapper’s on his knees.

C = Collar (do they mark you as theirs in some way?)

Trap has issued exactly one wedding band in his life and decided that was his allotment of personal claim on another person for a lifetime. That said, he feels insanely hot wearing a collar, holy shit. It flips some kind of switch in his head, he doesn’t know it yet in-fic, but it’s going to be fun. He might leave the occasional bruise or scratch when he’s excited.

D = Dominant (who is in control? are they a top or bottom?)

Trap likes to top. God, he loves running his lover through their paces, surprising them and pushing their limits, he loves the reactions he gets. He likes feeling powerful in bed, and knows his experience can be overwhelming at times. Given his size (ha), he’s trained himself to slow down and only hit the gas after some encouragement, but…once given, he’s hungry.

That said, there are ways to bring out obedience/service in him, usually that’s Max doing something absurdly dramatic and over the top like…crooking his finger. Tilting his head. Existing.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Extremely. Trapper started early and seems to have been born without all that ‘Shame’ business, seems like a waste of time. Limits opportunities for joy, and he’s not about that. He married a woman just like him to his family’s horror, and they have been poly since college. Trap and Louise ruined many a marriage just by showing up, it’s kind of made him numb to a lot of reflexive disgust/vitriol about his lifestyle. He has studded for many couples, is an enthusiastic cuck, and does fuck men, but doesn’t end up on bottom very often. Not particularly opposed, it just…doesn’t play that way. Until BJ shows up. That’s a whole other fic.

Now that the marriage has gone to bits though, he’s settled down some. He loved his wife very much, for all their faults as a couple, they were great parents and friends, and she still holds a lot of his heart. With Max, he’s taking it slow and serious, but that’s not a closed door for either of them. It’d just take someone already close, like Hawk, or a complete fluke to get the couple’s attention now that they have each other. I’ve considered doing a side fic pwp for Hawk/Trap/Max, but I might make it canon later in the fic. I dunno yet.

F = Fuck (do they prefer to fuck or make love?)

Yes. Trap’s pretty fluid on this one. He’s a hedonist at heart, preferring to initiate and play according to how his lover reacts. He finds it novel when a partner comes onto him or initiates because, again, due to his size and general demeanor, he’s usually the one making moves. He likes variety.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Depends on how bad he wants it, honestly. He’s all fun and games, to a point, and then there needs to be less clothing.

H = Hot (what turns them on, gets them going)

Max behind the bar, when he has his bartender face on, amusing a full row and still unable to ignore the way Trap stares at him. Having that kind of effect on him, that does it. The way he gets a little shy if Trap kisses him softly, if he’s too sweet to him. The way he gets nervous during horror movies and slowly migrates from the the floor to practically sitting on Trap’s shoulders. The way he looks when he’s focused on his stitching. Right now, the answer is Max.

I = Insatiable (how do they act when they’re desperate to have you?)

Trap has a look. His come-hither could pull a bull, and he uses it to great effect. He loves to rile Max up from across the room, just watching him work or play and letting his imagination run wild. He’s usually on a countdown from the moment the couple arrives at the party, especially if his partner dressed up for him, he lives for it. It’s just a matter of whether that countdown expires upstairs in the guest bathroom at the houseparty, or when they get in the car on the drive home, or later. Max loves to both wear lingerie and nothing at all under his clothes, and he’ll tell Trap right before they leave which is the case so he has no time to react.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Yes? Yes. Everything about it, with his partner, about his partner, for his partner, on the phone with his partner, on his partner, watching his partner and unable to help, look, he’s easy. He’s a weak man.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He’s just learned that he likes being restrained. He hasn’t gotten to explore it much yet, but Max is gonna take care of that. He likes lingerie and taking dirty pictures too, that’s a hobby of his that he’s going to get absurdly good at with a muse like Max. Wearing collars makes him hot and sets off Max’s need to edge him, and everyone wins. He takes orders well if you catch him in the right mood, and he loves playing games. He loves punishing the brat streak with edging, because Max begs. He loves catching Max stealing his things, bargaining sexual favors for chores and creating things for Max to be ‘caught’ in, because there’s a particular grin he gets when he realizes sex is a potential consequence? And it makes Trap’s heart do funny things.

L = Location (favorite places to have sex)

This man will be arrested again for public sex. Again, it’s just a matter of time. He’s insatiable, incorrigible, shameless. This man is trying to talk Max into Dressing Rooms in retail stores. He’s scoping bathrooms in restaurants. He’s finding alleys. He’s making Hawk wait outside the front door because he picked the couch and they’re not finished yet. It’s bad.

M = Mood (what’s the foreplay like? how do you get them in the mood?)

Well, you see normally, Max breathes in his presence, and then -- (Gestures)

N = Naked (how do they undress? do they like to watch you undress?)

You blink and Trap’s naked. He loves a strip tease though, god, especially when he’s restrained and can’t get closer. Max is going to have a lot of fun with making him wait while he puts on the drag. Otherwise, he’s the one throwing shirts on the ceiling fan. You’re finding underwear in the floorboard, and it’s his, because Max went without and that’s why it’s there to begin with.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Giving, Prone to worship, Trap will zone out and go to his happy place. He has to be stopped, it’s not going to occur to him on his own once he settles in.

Receiving, he’s always tempered himself here, he’s in the Big Dicks club, and it’s sacrifice is usually full penetration. The first time Max demonstrates that, with a little liquor in him, he can deepthroat? John has a fucking crisis. He’ll ask for it, and after a while, he figures out nuances in Max’s looks that means he wants to offer, because the man can’t use his words to save his life. Max says it’s sex telepathy, but he really just broadcasts filth in his microexpressions in a way Trap can read.

(Radar agrees it’s sex telepathy.)

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Depends on his partner, mostly. He has moods where he want to be fast and rough just like Max does, and that kind of energy in one incites it in the other. They play off each other, but are healthily prone to tenderness. They both work very hard and don’t always have the energy to fuck like college students, but that’s about where they are, for pace and frequency.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Oh, he can get a lot done in thirty minutes. So much. Ten minutes. Five?

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Yeah, Trap will try anything once, and while we haven’t gotten there in-fic yet, he’s into nonsexual cathartic masochism. It ends up bothering Max a little, so he doesn’t indulge it often. BJ taught him what bottoming is supposed to be like, his early experiences with it were fumbling, rushed, drunken things, and he never really got the hype, etc. It’s still hard for him to relax, and it leaves him feeling more vulnerable than he likes, so it’s rare, twice a year of his own volition, more if Max asks, but, that’s a lark. They have a rhythm.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

On a normal day, he can outlast his partner through two or three, though he may have to force himself to talk to stave it off. He may manage two himself if he’s well rested. On a day where he’s worked 24+ hours straight due to the hospital, there’s a risk. The risk is that in about thirty minutes, parts of his brain go into standby, in favor of the sex. Those thing are…sleep, hunger, thirst, and unfortunately, orgasm. Which means his usual 2-3 hours becomes 5-6 and whatever marathon he can fit in that time between erections. He’ll let you nap. There’s also a risk of this happening if he’s been teased/edged for an extended period of time.

T = Tryst (are they into casual sex or one night stands?)

Ha, like a trickster god, everyone is surprised to wake up with this man, but they do. He accumulates barflys like a UV light and indulged many of them for a long time. He’s got a big heart though, kinda tender under all that buff, and he’s been hurt recently, so he’s taking it slow. Starting to get his swagger back, but also kinda… maybe…really into this guy, he’s met? Like, really, worryingly into Max, like daydreaming about introducing him to his kids, you know? That’s…he doesn’t know, neither of them will sit still for that conversation.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

This is how Trapper shows affection.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He’s not as verbal/noisy as Max is, but he is a bit of a chatterbox once he gets going. He likes challenging him, like the way he reacts to his tone of voice and uses that often to start things or tease him in public. He’s prone to petnames anyway, but especially in bed, and adjusts his pillowtalk to suit the mood. On the phone, he’s filthy. His favorite thing to do in the hotel in Boston is call the bar up and hog Max on the phone so he can A)Keep other assholes from calling during the rush, and B) Get some truly Phone-Sex-Operator Narratives across in snatches, so he can C) Call him back after the shift and finish his story when Max can uh…pay attention. He doesn’t beg often, and rarely more than a tight please that reads as ‘now’. We’ll see how he holds up under Max’s drag exploration.

W = Wait (how long do they wait before having sex with their partner for the first time?)

…That long. If they’ll let him. He took it slow with Max because he’s…great, as a friend and person first, but also…really great? In general, and Trap’s got this hang up about letting himself have nice things, suddenly. You can put an atheist through catholic school and they won’t find religion, just guilt, it’s strange. Mostly, he’s older and tired of hurting people, on accident, on purpose, being careless. If he ever hurt Max, he’d be…real catholic, real quick, about it. He doesn’t want to talk about it yet though. That’s still too big in his teeth.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Look, his other nickname is Big John, and Max insists he could renaissance the porn industry. He’s lean, and the way he works, his metabolism doesn’t know up from down, so he slides fifteen pounds on and off every six months. His dad-bod was the same, just thicker in every direction, less defined. He had a short…three months or so here where he was substituting liquor for meals, but his friends caught it, he’s doing better now. He’s tall, legs for days, and a grin that lights up the room.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He will literally think about you all day. He does think about Max all day, there’s a channel in his head that is permanently replaying some recent sexual escapade of theirs, or inventing new ones. He can’t be around him for more than fifteen minutes, it’s honestly gross for Hawk and all of their friends, they have zero chill. Max pretending he doesn’t know/isn’t participating is the scam of the century, and that’s the closest they get to nonconsensual public BDSM.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He’s usually not going to black out unless he’s been at it for a while, or it culminates one of his of his long shifts. He likes to lie awake while his partner crashes alongside/atop him, basking.

#90s trapper #90s headcanons

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castle-dominion · 1 year

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c4x7 cops & robbers

castle: bored af Tho I like how he's with his mom at the bank not for co-signing or anything but just for... moral support?

MR: Richard, I’m a business woman now. I do not want your money, I do not want your signature, thank you very much. It’s the principle. Dp: No, Ms. Rogers, it’s the interest. RC: And I’ve just lost mine. Excuse me.

I'm watching this after covid, it didn't seem out of the ordinary At All to see ppl with masks. RC, seeing sussy stuff: Hm. I think this bank is about to be robbed. *robbery starts* RC: It’s not my imagination. It’s definitely not my imagination. I love how he Just Happens to be on the phone with the cops when this is going down lol. She's able to just call it over to her homicide team

Ok so I know This Guy & he just nods at castle's shh motion. Makes sense For Now. Castle should really put the phone in his bra or smth so he can have it still recording w/o needing to have it up to his ear obviously. If it was in his bra (which he totally has) he could still describe the scene (which is smart of him) Manager just has it on his neck? Make that four. "You a cop? (to Castle) You called a cop?" "No. I-- We were already on the line when you guys came in."

British sounding accent huh Love the different doctor names. My first thought was healthcare was so bad in the usa that they needed to rob a bank. How did he open the door I thought he locked it? He DID lock it the thing is right there! I guess it has some wiggle room. You know, come to think of it, those doors look lik ethey are made of glass. Strong structured & thick, but still. A heavy object a couple times... Love a good hostage situation. We've all seen Die Hard we know how this goes.

Man's right. You're homicide he's robbery. He's also very calm & direct. Not impolite but firm & short. (tho "missed your cue" was rude) Where's demming tho?

What if I raise my hand to ask a question? lmao acab tho I don't trust anything here

Ryan looks very s2 like. Blue shirt, tie, brown normal jacket. Espt looks bisexual with his layers. Nice to have contacts in emergency service units Bro I think the robbery people have this handled.

She's a woman she doesn't need to have a bedroom voice the robber is just like horny & straight or smth I don't think that keeping him calm is hard bc he seems like a pro. TJ: Yeah, I don't like that other guy. KB: Yeah, me neither. peterson: ?? Trapper John! Bro it's M*A*S*H! You should come down & watch this episode with us! He IS a pro Oh no now cap peterson thinks that he is beckett's boyf.

Wow what a jerk. Blaming someone for the bank getting robbed. Or well, for getting the cops here too soon. If the cops didn't get here maybe they would have left with the money & let the hostages go. Except the bank ppl said the silent alarms went so ok. Oh no don't tell me we're going to deliver a baby I like how she says they should let the pregnant lady go but the way she says it implies she's ok with being held hostage.

RC: Don’t worry mother. I saw this work on Die Hard. RC: Uh, Mr. Howser-- Excuse me, Doctor Howser. Why not just give them a cup behind a desk?

RC: So, why Doogie Howser? I mean there's so many cool TV doctors you could pick.

Was espt in ESU before homicide? What IS his exp?

omg he likes her <3 lmao the banker & actress hitting it off I wanted to check out the food at my new work before I start working there & ofc I ended up using the washroom & there was some sort of old b/w sensual film playing in the stall. it is not his box: how did he get the key? woah castle remembers which wall & row & column it was in?? & Dp knows the number??? Martha-?

Three hours sounds... reasonable...

it's me! I know morse code! ... -.. is what I saw but they kept cutting away. I also don't know numbers only letters. Numbers are easy I just don't know them. how DO you know it's him? It could be another smart civilian!

Martha actress moments Why is That Guy telling castle this? He was "in the washroom" during castle's secret message sal martino? idk I'll continue with That Guy (unless I quote). "you have no idea" WOW THIS EPISODE IS GOOD I don't make promises

Rick did too well, SM was supposed to freak out bc of the c-4 but rick calmed him down which was NOT the plan.

Wasn't gideon fields? Sus. KR: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You can't go in there, we don't have a warrant and we don't have probable cause. JE: Bro, Castle's life depends on this. KR: ... Did you just hear that? I think I just heard someone yell out, "Help, police!" JE: (in a voice) "Help, police!" There it is again. Ah yes, dead bodies. Grody. & perfect for the homicide detectives.

I couldn't tell if she was dead for a week or she was just old... but then again the smell of decomp

JE: I don't get it. This is a little, old, retired librarian. What could possibly be in her safe deposit box that would be worth doing all this? KR: Nazi gold, cold fusion, map to Atlantis. JE: Hey, Castle Jr., could you maybe start thinking like a cop, please? (Castle HAS mentioned nazi gold) KR standing with That Booty: I am!?? JE: Are you? KR: It had to have been something huge that was worth killing her over, right? Hey, Super Cop, check it out.

Hug alexis, becks, she needs it, you might too. But hey, rick made kate promise to take care of alexis! & esposito promised to get rid of his porn collection!

Rick just do the flashing bracelet thing again. Idk numbers but (-.-.) ..-. --- ..- .-. is easy enough What is HER accent? cushions is a good idea <3 GOSH WHAT aT Least put him sideways so he doesn't choke!

told Whom to stay with her? Y'all never leave me a voicemail, please text.

it's legit not enough time bestie Send in esposito he looks like a buff firefighter paramedic

Trapper would know her voice. Bad idea. Love the double talking obv not a paramedic since she didn't know she could put the gurney closer to the ground & then raise it up once the fellow is on there UM SIGN LANGUAGE MUCH? Castle could have totally slipped it into sal's shirt

Martha should totally have just kicked everyone's ass & the hostages could have gotten themselves out on the fury of a mother There is a second T in twenTy kate That chuckle was very nathan fillion bc that's where the money is lmao Castle why are you revealing your hand? Just like tf2 for real just like rvb for real Castle has escaped duck tape before. Zip ties are easy to get out of

RC: Mother, I find I'm no longer satisfied with the customer service at this establishment. I think we should take our business elsewhere. Me: Is that code? RC: no just trying to be funny ig

Ron Brandt. Good thing I didn't switch names Were those guys wearing black before? & now they are covered in dust? or were they always wearing that greyish colour?

PUT AWAY THE GUN BEFORE YOU UNTIE THEM BESTIE mr: *shaking her hands with a grin*

They would NOT have messed up Captain Peterson probably is surprised with how good castle is, he's like "wow this guy really does know his stuff" Whose body parts?

Oh no are castle's banker & mother going to sleep together?

I like how beckett has a touchphone & ryan has a flip or smth

See? Castle wasn't supposed to calm him down Holy crap bad bruising I sometimes hate being a christian (what with being who I am) but right now I love it.

That Guy: Honey, I'm home. what a line Girl u should have kicked his balls while he was outside the door TG: Oh, no. Hon, you bumped your head. Ha what a typical abuser line. Disgusting.

*kept the cop's face in shadow*

JE: Come on, let's go pick them up. KR: Ithaca??? Why is espt just going on this huge road trip with ryan? RC: Even as a hostage, I help you solve murders. Beckett, I think…I think you have the perfect partner.

Poor alexis. Poor Ash. Long distance sucks.

In my binge watch I should have counted these. 8th time becks saved castle, castle has saved her 9.

The vodun episode with the purses & champagne, I remember that. The nikki heat murders were not a save, she lived you just gave her your coat RC: Won't be forgetting that anytime soon.

#castle 4x7 #castle 4x7 quote #castle 4x7 spoilers

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pierceintyre-hunnihawk-butnsfw · 2 years

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Lollipop

I had just gotten done with my shift by the time that lunch was called, so I decided to go ahead and get lunch while a nurse said that she’d take over. I went through the line as usual, and as I was finishing up on filling my tray, I noticed that Hawkeye had been sitting across a higher up that I’d never seen before. Before I could think anything of it, Hawkeye waved for me to come over. I did as Hawkeye wanted, and then I’m talking along with the both of them.

“Trap! This is my nemesis Colonel Flagg.”

“Ah, another man here for Margaret?”

“Very funny you two, but I’m here strictly on business.”

We both shared a look of, “this guy isn’t worth our time” and went back to listen to whatever it was that he had to say. After I cracked a joke.

“I thought Margaret was business.”

“Not exactly Captain…?”

“Trapper McIntyre.”

“John, Trapper McIntyre.”

“You look…happy, Hawkeye. You haven’t smiled once since I sat down.”

“Trapper brings it out of me.”

“I knew it! You’re one of those too!”

“Sue me.”

Flagg wrote some stuff down on a stack of paper that was attached to his clipboard. I decided to keep my mouth shut, as Colonel Flagg was already more than annoyed.

“What about you, McIntyre?”

“Only on the weekends.”

“Sometimes on Monday’s.”

“I thought it was Tuesday’s?”

“Enough, you two. If I find out that any of that is true, especially for you, Hawkeye, you’re going to get a dishonorable discharge.”

“Trap? How does an all expenses-paid trip back to the states sound?”

“Not half bad, to be honest.”

“I thought you were married, McIntyre.”

“Haven’t been since, uh, Hawkeye?”

“Two weeks ago.”

“So you two really are a couple?”

“No, but also yes, but also no, but yeah, but also, no.”

We could tell that Flagg was getting more annoyed with us the more he sat with us, and so he moved to another table with Frank and Margaret. Hawkeye and I just laughed until we were both red in the face.

“Trap?”

“Yeah?”

“What time do we go back to work?”

“I only got scheduled until lunch. What about you?”

“Are you off tonight?”

“I am”

“Perfect, me too!”

“No way!”

“I begged the Colonel, and he agreed. Even he hates Flagg.”

“Who wouldn’t?”

“Margaret and Frank over there. I mean, they’re practically drooling over him.”

“Ah, let them.”

I could tell that there was something else on Hawkeye’s mind, but I couldn’t figure out just exactly what it was, yet. However, as we sat in comfortable silence, I couldn’t ruin it. Lunch ended, Hawkeye went to work, and I decided to join him, as I had nothing else to do, and I sure as hell was not about to listen to Frank boast about how great Flagg was. I would’ve slapped him. I took this opportunity to talk to Hawkeye more.

“Trapper! You don’t have to be here.”

“I figured that I’d just check in and see how everyone’s doing. Mainly, how you’re doing.”

“Trap, I’m doing just fine. I mean, I am tired of Flagg already, and he just got here. However, I’m hoping that Margaret and Frank can keep him occupied enough to the point that he’ll leave us alone. What do you think about him?”

“He seems like a MacArthur wannabe, really.”

I got closer to Hawkeye, but not enough to touch him. He must’ve been too preoccupied to notice, or just assumed that I needed to get by. I decided to put my hands around his waist to move him over.

“What was that for, Trap?”

“Just grabbing some supplies here.”

Hawkeye followed me over, and put his hand on my shoulder and started whispering in my ear. I took this as a sign to lower my voice as well.

“Do that again.”

“Why?”

“It felt…good.”

“Good? Or do you want me to do more?”

“Trap, it’s the middle of the day.”

“And?”

“What if Flagg catches us?”

“We can lock the supply room, tell radar to keep Flagg occupied, and do as we please.”

“That’s not effective enough. Besides, he can just have Henry unlock it.”

“We can’t go to The Swamp either. Hmm, what if we go to that abandoned tent?”

“Flagg claimed it.”

“Dammit!”

“Trap, keep your voice low.”

“Wait until tonight.”

“I hate waiting.”

“I know, but I promise it’ll be worth it.”

“What’s in it for me?”

“A release.”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me. I promise it’ll be worth it.”

“Fine, but I’m going to hold you to that.”

“Fine with me, Hawk.”

I kissed his cheek quick.

“Until tonight, my love.”

“Un-Until tonight.”

I went off to The Swamp and noticed Frank and Flagg standing in the middle talking. I wasn’t paying attention to what they were saying, but it was starting to annoy me. Then again, both of them being there annoyed me.

“Are you one of them, McIntyre?”

“Does it matter?”

“If you want to stay here, yes.”

“So, stay here and be miserable or go home and be miserable. I’m seeing a lose-lose situation here. Either way, it doesn’t matter.”

“I will tell Blake about this.”

“Go ahead, He’ll side with me.”

Flagg and Frank then left, and I was finally happy. Then, Hawkeye came in.

“I thought you were working.”

“I was, but Henry let me go.”

“I wonder why.”

“Something about me needing some time off, or something. All I really heard was,”you’re working too hard, why do you take a break for a bit?” I’m thankful either way.”

“Me too. Hawkeye?”

“Yeah. Could you come here for a moment?”

“Of course! Cold?”

“Extremely.”

“Allow me.”

Hawkeye walked right over, and held me. It was a really nice feeling, and I really just wanted to hold him.

“Trap?”

“Yeah?”

“What are we going to do about Flagg?”

“Beg Henry to make him leave sooner rather than later.”

“And how are we going to do that?”

“Make his stay as unbearable as humanly possible.”

“How so?”

“What did we do to drive Sargent Wall outta here?”

“Well, we made as many jokes as we could.”

“I’ll get the oatmeal.”

“I’ll get the goat.”

I allowed Hawkeye to leave first, but I couldn’t help but watch him leave. I couldn’t help but feel like I was down bad.

“I borrowed Radar’s goat.”

“I’ve got the oatmeal.”

“You should put that in Frank’s boots too.”

“I should.”

“Half and half.”

“Perfect!”

“So are you.”

Fuck. Why did I say that? Now how in the hell am I going to play that off?

“I mean-”

“You-you like me?”

Welp, there’s no going back now.

“I do.”

“I like you too.”

“Is it enough to…?”

“Oh, absolutely! I thought you’d never ask!”

“We’re thinking the same thing, right?”

“I hope so.”

“On the count of three, let’s just say it.”

“Okay.”

We both started counting from three, and then this happened.

“Three…two…one… sex!”

We both had a dumbfounded look on our faces, but it soon turned into a giant fit of laughter.

“I can’t believe that we thought of the same thing!”

“Me either! How are we this attached?”

“Beats the hell outta me! I like it, though.”

“Me too.”

I kept staring into his beautiful blue eyes. It was as if I couldn’t look away from them, but business had to be done.

“We should uh..”

“Oh, yeah. Tonight, right?”

“Of course.”

“Good.”

With that awkward conversation out of the way, we moved onto what the purpose of us being here.

“Oatmeal’s in his boot.”

“Goat’s eating the paperwork.”

“Let’s get the outta here before they notice.”

“I agree.”

“Did Radar tell you when the goat has to be back?”

“Once this is over. Apparently Flagg said something that upset Radar. I’d like to know what he said. I'd like to give him a taste of his own medicine.”

“Hawkeye, you’ll knock his lights out before he can even open his mouth.”

“Damn right I will. No one upsets Radar like that.”

“How bad was it?”

“Radar fell apart as soon as he opened his mouth.”

“Let’s go ahead and ruin him.”

“If only there was a way that I could get him kicked out without getting kicked out myself.”

“I didn’t read anything like that in the manual. Maybe Henry knows.”

We headed to dinner, and waited for an official and a major to start yelling like a couple of madmen. Just then, Frank and flagg stormed in yelling, raising hell, and being a couple of idiots.

“My papers have been eaten by a goat! My boots had a copious amount of oatmeal being shoved in them, and frank’s too! Now, which one of you, or two of you are responsible for this?!”

The whole mess tent went silent.

“No one wants to break, huh?”

Flagg made his way over to Hawkeye and I. We weren’t nervous, but rather tried to control our laughter.

“You idiots!”

“Caught us.”

“Do you two know what you’ve done?!”

“Do we care?”

“I know you two don’t!”

I saw Hawkeye slowly start to stand up. He kept eye contact with Flagg and for once, I couldn’t stop smiling. Just then, Hawkeye balled up his hand into a fist, and punched Flagg with as much strength as he could.

“That was for making Radar upset. This is for bothering the hell out of Trap and I.”

Just then, Hawkeye kicked him, not enough to cause any harm, but just enough to scare the daylights outta Flagg. I watched out of pure amazement. Flagg left shortly after, and so did Frank, Margaret, and just about the whole camp, except for Hawkeye and I.

“Hawkeye?”

“Yes?”

“Has anyone ever told you that you look attractive when you’re mad?”

“Never.”

“I’d like to be the first then.”

“Really?”

“Watching you strike him in the face was the biggest sense of relief I’ve ever been a witness to. It looked personal too.”

“It was. Radar is like a nephew to me. We gotta watch out for each other, y’know?”

“I understand. Honestly, it was kinda hot.”

“Hot?”

“Hot enough for me to…”

I slowly snaked a hand over Hawkeye’s pants, and slowly started to rub his cock. He was like putty in my hands. I moved Hawkeye onto my lap and started kissing his neck. Hearing his moans and watching him squirm excited something in me. We stayed like that until Hawkeye started to writher in my hands out of pleasure, but I knew we couldn't stay like that for long.

“Not-Not here.”

“I agree. Let’s go back to The Swamp, lock the door, and have some fun.”

“Let-let’s make sure Frank isn’t there.”

“I’ll double check, my love.”

“What did you just call me?”

“My love. It’s just a placeholde-”

Hawkeye shut me up with a kiss. His lips were so soft and inviting. I couldn’t help but kiss him more. He started running his hands through my hair, not enough to ruin it, but just enough to fluff it up more. We slowly started pulling away for air, but when we fully pulled away, Hawkeye’s eyes sparkled.

“Your eyes are like sapphires, Hawkeye.”

“Really?”

“You have no idea. I could stare at them all day. You probably think that’s really corny, though”

“Trap?”

“Yeah?”

“There’s nothing you could do or say that would make me adore you any less.”

“Hawkeye, there’s something that I’ve been meaning to tell you.”

“Yeah?”

“I-I’m in love with you. You make me so damn happy, I finally know what love is. After everything you and I have been through, I figured now would be the best time to tell you. I couldn't tell you in front of Flagg, or even Henry. I, John “Trapper” McIntyre, am in love with you.”

“On that note, I, Benjamin Franklin “Hawkeye” Pierce, am also in love with you, and have been since we worked on that one patient together.”

“I don’t know what to say. Hawkeye, you just made me the happiest man in all of Korea.”

“Then, that makes me the second happiest man in Korea.”

I saw Hawkeye’s smile get bigger, and by the time that we had made our confession, we were already at our tent. However, there was Henry, Margaret, Frank, and Flagg standing in front of it. I hoped to every god that I could think of that they didn’t hear our confession.

“So, you two pranked us?”

“Yes.”

“Do you know what you’ve done?!”

“Nope.”

“Do either of you care?”

I looked over at Hawkeye, who now had the biggest grin of satisfaction on his face. We spoke in unison.

“Nope!”

With that, Flagg left. Everyone else, including Henry, threw their hands up and continued life as normal. Margaret and Frank went to their shared quarters, and Hawkeye and I were finally alone. We walked into our shared space and locked the door. I watched Hawkeye get undressed from today. I decided to carefully walk behind him, put my arms around his waist, and start kissing his neck softly. Hawkeye leaned into me, and I started tracing my hands over his skin.

“I-is it safe, Trap?”

“It is, my love.”

“Touch me more. Please, touch me more.”

I did what Hawkeye begged me to. His skin was so soft and he was incredibly vulnerable. I noticed that Hawkeye had already removed his boots and socks. I started to lose myself in him, but when my hands guided themselves to his pants, I couldn’t control myself. I reached the waistband of his pants, but stopped to look up at him.

“Trap-Trapper?”

“Yes?”

“Off.”

“Off?”

“Off. Please.”

I removed Hawkeye’s pants, and kissed his neck all the way down to his navel. I noticed that he shivered more the lower I went. I laid him down on my cot, got in between his legs, and kissed his lips more. He started pulling at my clothes as well, so I slowly removed everything until I was just in my boxers and t-shirt.

“Trapper?”

“Yes?”

“I-I’ve never been with a guy before.”

“Me neither. Let’s just take things slow, my dear. I promise I won’t hurt you.”

“Not unless I want you to?”

“Not unless you want me to.”

Hawkeye kissed me again, and I couldn’t help but kiss back. I couldn’t help but touch Hawkeye more. Having him this close was a gift from the heavens. I dreamt of this moment before, but I couldn’t believe that it would feel this good.

“Trap?”

“Yes?”

“I-I’m ready.”

“Me too. Let me grab the supplies.”

As I was taking off my shirt and boxers, I grabbed the lube and condoms. Shortly after, I felt Hawkeye run a hand through my hand and mutter about how handsome I looked in the pale moonlight draped through the empty slots of the old weathered wood that was our window.

“Hawkeye?”

“Yeah? You look so goddamn beautiful.”

“I-”

“Shhh, talk later. For now, let’s enjoy our night.”

I slid on the condom and put the lube on. I heard that there wasn’t such a thing as too much lube, so I put as much on as I felt was appropriate. Obviously, I didn’t want to hurt the man who was to take my virginity in this way. I lined myself up with Hawkeye and slowly entered him, not wanting to hurt him.

“S-so big.”

“Easy, baby. Relax for me.”

“Ye-yes, Sir.”

“You’re doing so good, my love.”

I allowed Hawkeye to get adjusted to my size, and watched him become a mess in the process. His beautiful blue eyes were blown out with lust, and damn was he handsome. I eventually pulled out of Hawkeye, but steadily entered him again.

“Trap?”

“Everything okay? We-”

“I-I just wanted you to know that, I’ve wanted this for so long.”

“Me too, baby. That day I saw you in that blue Hawaiian shirt with a martini in hand, thinking evil thoughts, I just knew I had to have you.”

Hawkeye closed his eyes and had the biggest smile on his face as I started to build up a rhythm. Knowing that I was the one doing this to him made me feel something deep in my heart. I felt like I was falling in love all over again, but harder than before.

“Trapper. Trapper.”

“Yes?”

“Don’t stop. Please don’t stop.”

“I won’t, not now at least.”

“I feel so close…”

“Not yet, my darling. Just wait a little longer.”

“It feels so good…”

“I know, baby. But, not yet. I promise it’ll be soon.”

“Ngk. I need you.”

“I know baby, I need you too.”

Seeing Hawkeye so close, and that I was the cause, turned me on more. Could it be the way that he was moaning my name? Maybe. Could it be the way that I was fucking him? Could be. Either way, I had no plans on stopping. Hawkeye started gripping the sheets and became more of a mess than I thought that he would. It could just be the words of my ex wife telling me that, “no one would love me the way that she did.” Or the fact that this was my first time pleasing the one I love.

“Trapper…”

“I know, baby. You’re doing so well for me, angel.”

“A-angel?”

“Did I say something wrong?”

“Quite the opposite. I like that nickname.”

“Oh baby, you’re my angel. My one and only.”

Hawkeye closed his eyes once again, and I started picking up the pace, but not enough to hurt my love.

“D-don’t stop.”

“Enjoying this, are we?”

“Y-yes, Sir.”

“Sir? That must mean that you’ll be obedient, but only for me.”

“I’ll do whatever you want me to. I-I’ll even shine your boots for you. Just don’t stop.”

I could tell that Hawkeye was getting close, so I slowed down, not wanting to ruin the moment too much.

“Why-why’d you slow down?”

“You were getting close, and I didn’t want you to cum just yet.”

Hawkeye let out a low groan, but slowly started to smile again. I had him just where I wanted him.

“Angel, I don’t want our fun to be over just yet. I want tonight to be memorable. It’s what you deserve.”

“A night of romance and sexual pleasure?”

“Hawkeye, you bust your ass day in and day out. You go outta your way to help those who need it. Hell, you’re dealing with me for fuck’s sake. That’s a handful and then some, angel. And you’re doing such a damn good job too. Hawkeye, you deserve nothing but absolute pleasure, and I’m more than happy to give that to you.”

“You mean it?”

“Every bit of it, my love.”

“Come here.”

I did as Hawkeye wanted, and he pulled me into a passionate kiss. He then, slowly started trailing kisses all over my body while muttering about how much he loves it. When he got back to my neck, there were hickey’s all over it, leading down to my navel. We started making out like a couple of teenagers, that is, until Hawkwye’s hands snaked their way around my waist, and then all over my back.

“Fuck…”

“Where do you want me, Sir?”

“On your back, angel. Just like that…”

Hawkeye leaned back, and I realigned myself with him. I slowly started pumping into him, but also watched him writher in delight. Hawkeye started panting harder, and his moans filled my ears like a song. I was in such a state of euphoria that I felt like I was about to cum. I had to hold it in a little longer so we could truly become one.

“Sir, I’m so close…oh god, I’m so close.”

“Easy, baby. Hold it just a little longer.”

“But.”

“Shhhh…”

Hawkeye relaxed once again and I felt like I was finally in control once more. I sped up more, but this time, I knew I wasn’t going to last much longer.

“I’m so close, Sir.”

“Me too, baby. Oh god, I’m fucking close.”

“Don’t stop. Fuck, don’t stop.”

“I-I.”

“Cum for me, Sir. Please…”

As soon as Hawkeye said that, I came. Hawkeye did too, but the face that he made when he came was like looking at a masterpiece.

“You-you’re staring.”

“I know. It’s just that you’re so fucking beautiful.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course, angel. Come here, let’s get some rest.”

“Do you think the camp heard us?”

“Who cares? Let them.”

“Trapper, your neck.”

I looked at my neck, and sure enough Hawkeye’s teeth marks were deep. I didn’t really mind them, it was like having a sense of seniority and dominance on me. I was proud to have them.

“I-“

“Don’t apologize. You were amazing, Hawkeye. And hey, I could get used to these”

“Thank you, Trapper. That one’s in an obvious spot, though.”

“That’s okay, I like it. It beats having to wear a ring.”

“But-”

“They’re from you, baby. I now have you with me all the time, and that’s the best thing that I could ever have, I promise.”

“What about Flagg?”

“Oh, fuck Flagg. If he decides to somehow send us back, let him. This place won’t really survive long without us. Especially you. You’re the heart and backbone of this camp. They’d be lost without you.”

“You really think so?”

“I know so. C’mon,let’s get cleaned up.”

“Okay.”

I grabbed our robes, soap, and then some, and then led Hawkeye to the showers. The camp was practically deserted, so getting to the showers without getting yelled at, either by Henry or a major, was a breeze. I helped Hawkeye clean up, as he didn’t have much strength in his legs, and also washed his hair.

“You’re taking care of me?”

“Of course I’m taking care of you. You’re my baby.”

“You’re too good for me.”

“No baby, you’re too good for me.”

“I love you, Trapper.”

“I love you too, darling.”

After our shower, we got dressed, took our stuff back to The Swamp,changed out everything, and headed to bed. Hawkeye fell asleep the moment I draped an arm around him. I shortly followed after thinking about how much in love I truly was.

#bj hunnicutt #hawkeye pierce #hunnihawk #bj x hawkeye #beejhawk

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shes-ghostface · 4 years

Note

The killers reacting to getting a hug from us (reader) please? 😍

I love wholesome asks like this 😩

The Trapper: okay so this man is not exactly the hugging type, so if you hugged him he wouldn’t like it straight away. He’d be confused and probably push you to the floor and raise his weapon to kill you, but he’d stall for a minute thinking about how comforting it felt. He hasn’t had a hug in a long time and it made him feel something he isn’t used to. He would lower his weapon and stare at you for a few seconds, then quickly turn and aggressively walk away. Maybe next time he won’t push you off of him, but don’t ever expect him to hug you back.

The Wraith: now this precious bean would love it. He’s always cold and rough to the touch, so if you hugged him he would love the warmth he’d get from you, he’d also appreciate the fact you even want to hug him in the first place considering he isn’t human anymore. He’d hug you back instantly, not wanting the hug to end, but when the entity calls, the entity calls. So he leaves you with a sad look in his eyes, yearning for the next hug you will both share.

The Huntress: now Anna is a tricky one, anyone who comes close she immediately feels like she has to be on guard due to having to fend for herself for so long, you would have to be really brave to approach her, never mind trying to give her a hug. But let’s say she let you get close enough to, at first she would stiffen up and feel constricted. Because of this, she would reach for a hatchet on her belt, but once she notices you’re not doing anything to harm or trap her, she starts to feel comfort from the hug. She hasn’t had any loving human contact since her mother died those years ago, so feeling this sense of comfort again brings a tear to her eye. After a few seconds she’ll hug you back, but not for long. She still isn’t fully trusting of you, so she will let you go and walk away humming her mother’s lullaby onto her next trial.

The Hillbilly: Max is a child at heart. So if you hug this precious baby he will love it, like Anna he will be hesitant at first because of what he went through as a child. He will think you’re just getting close to hurt him, he never got any form of love from the people in his life. So when you hug him he’ll be taken aback, wondering why you want to have him in your arms. Why aren’t you running? Why do you want him close to you in any sense? He puts himself down a lot due to his past, but you giving him this hug will boost his esteem just that little bit. He loves the feeling it gives him, he puts one arm around you to slightly hold you back due to him still being a little nervous as to why you’re hugging him. But after the first few hugs here and there, Max will be coming over to hug you instead of you going over to hug him.

The Nurse: Sally always was a caring person, she hugged a lot of people in her time as a nurse. So when you approach to hug her, she won’t stop you. She knows it’s a form of comfort as she gave many patients hugs to make them feel better about their situation. So honestly, if you ever need a hug, Sally will always be there to hug you back tightly. She misses hugs just as much as you.

The Doctor: Like Sally, Herman was a caring person at one time in his life. Treating patients and caring for them, he gave plenty of hugs to his patients and their families in tough situations. So if you hugged him, he’d hug you back whilst doing his little laugh. But don’t expect the hug to be all sunshine and rainbows, he will shock you for his own amusement and just laugh in your face. So you can go to him for hugs whenever you want, but is it worth the pain from the shocks? That’s up to you.

The Hag: Lisa isn’t really the easiest to approach, she’ll have her traps set around her area, so as soon as you’re near she’ll pop up in front of you. She will be defensive at first and may swing at you, but once she sees you mean no harm, she will allow you to stay in front of her. When you go to hug her she will tense up and growl, but she recognises this feeling from her past when her elders used to hug one another in the village. It’s been so long since she had a feeling that made her think about them, she’ll appreciate the fact you made her think of happier times and may slightly hug you back..

The Blight: much like Max, he will be confused as to why you want to hug him. He’s full of sticky, glowing serum so why would you want that anywhere near you? Talbot is aware of hugging, and he isn’t against it. He gets no visitors outside of trials, so the hug from you will be the light in the dark for him, even just for a little while. So expecting a slight feeling of a sticky arm wrapping around you lightly.

The Legion: three of these little buggers will hug you back INSTANTLY. Susie will hug you the tightest, hugs are her favourite and any form of friendliness and comfort she is all for it. Julie isn’t as excited as Susie but she will still love it, she will take any form of comfort she can get. Joey will be like Susie, he’s a softie and will pick you up to hug you even tighter. Now Frank, he’s not into it at all. He didn’t get much love from his family, the only love he has known is the love he gets from the other three, so don’t expect much. He doesn’t even hug the others often, only when one of them has a bad trial he will try make them feel better by holding them for a few seconds but that’s it. So when you go to hug him, he’ll scoff at you and just tap you on the back.

Bubba: This beefy boy will love hugs, family was very important to him even if they weren’t particular loving towards him. He is aware of what hugs are and will let you come up to him with no problem, you’re no threat on your own. When you hug him he’ll pick you up and squeeze you, maybe just a little too tight.. all whilst doing his loud excited noises. Bubba gives some of the best hugs, even if they almost break your back every time.

The Demogorgon: okay, so this precious pupper won’t want a hug. It is very defensive and when you approach, it will show it’s teeth and let out a screech, but if you approach it slowly and talk gently, it’ll let you get close enough and lean down to let you pet it’s head. But don’t take your time, it doesn’t like people in it’s space for too long.

The Deathslinger: Caleb wouldn’t be against hugs but he wouldn’t be for it either, he’s kinda not bothered. You can hug him, but he won’t hug you back. He’ll probably just sigh and pat your head so you leave him alone sooner, just so he can get back to cleaning his gun.

Michael Myers: just don’t attempt it. He will kill you, if you even come within 15 feet of him he’ll break your legs. Do not approach this man!!

Freddy: you can try hug him if you want to, but he’ll just mess with you if you do. He’s not against hugs but he just isn’t a fan of anyone but himself so if you touch him he’ll send you straight to dream world and make the next hour for you a living hell.

The Twins: Charlotte and Victor are family oriented and of course know what hugs are. So if you went to hug Charlotte she would allow it, and slightly hug you back. But if you tried to hug Victor, he wouldn’t have a problem with it because he likes hugs, but Charlotte would get defensive as she’s used to survivors kicking him. So when it comes to hugging Victor, wait for her permission first or you will die.

Amanda: I think Amanda would hug you back honestly. Maybe not straight away, but because of how close she was with John, she would want some comfort after being without him for so long. She’d probably even talk to you for a little while about him and how much she misses him. But don’t stay too long, she’ll start to feel vulnerable and that’s when she’ll get on the defensive and reach for her reverse bear trap..

The Clown: he won’t want to hug you at all. He doesn’t like close contact so don’t bother, he will cut your finger off and suck it in front of you for even stepping within his radius. So if you attempted to hug him, he’d probably cut your arms off instead.

The Plague: Adiris isn’t really for or against hugs like some of the other killers. She would probably put one hand on your back and slightly rub but don’t expect her to hug back. And don’t hug her too tight, she will throw up. But at least when you hug her you’ll get a nice smell coming from her incense burner. Let’s just say the other killers don’t smell too good..

The Spirit: Rin would love hugs! She had a loving family, until she didn’t.. so she knew what hugs were once over and what they mean. So if you hugged her she would hug you back, but it won’t be a comfortable one.. the shards of glass will dig into you and because she twitches a lot they would scrape against your skin.. but you decide whether it would be worth it for little Rin or not!

The Oni: lawwwd, this man would give THE BEST hugs. If he actually wanted to give them that is, he isn’t particularly fond of them. Kazan had a rough past and all he knows is war and blood, you can attempt to hug him, if you can get close enough in the first place but he will rage if you try to touch him. Which is unfortunate because he looks like an amazing hugger.

Ghostface: this little shit will love it if you hug him. But not because he wants a hug, it’s because he gets to cop a feel. He will grab things, especially your butt.. when you hug him don’t expect his arms to wrap around you, just expect to feel his hands squeezing those cheeks. And when you walk away you’ll hear a camera click, he wants a keepsake of that butt.

Pyramid head: good lord this big guy. Like Oni, he would give the most amazing hugs because he’s so beefy and strong. But unfortunatley, he also won’t hug you back. He’ll allow you to approach him and put your arms around him, he may even let you touch his pyramid helmet. But don’t get your hopes up for a sneaky beefy arm moving around you. He won’t hug you, but fortunately he will let you hug him. He’ll just stand there and all you will hear is his rattled metallic breathing and you will feel his broad chest moving up and down. You can hug him as long as you like, he doesn’t care but if the entity calls, he will pull away faster than you can blink.

This was a pretty hard one because I feel a lot of the killers would react similarly, so some of these are more alike than I’d want them to be but I hope you like it 😂🖤

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rachelbethhines · 3 years

Text

Robin Hood and His Merry Band

list of characters for an original series I’m working on

Alan-a-Dale - the gloomy and cynical bard, the grumpy voice of reason who doesn’t give a fuck, wonders why he hangs out with these crazies, knows it’s cause they’re family to him but won’t admit it out loud, besties with Friar Tuck even though they never agree on anything, is clearly a bi disaster

The Archdeacon of Canterbury - The aging head cleric of the church of England. He supports King Richard but is becoming increasingly impotent because of his failing health. Still holds a lot of political power because of his title though.

The Azure Assassin - A deadly mercenary and rival to Robin Hood. Orphaned at a young age Azure had to steal to survive. She stowed away on a pirate ship at the age of ten and has spent the pass eight years studying fighting techniques the world over. They call her the Azure Assassin because her blue eyes are the last thing you’ll see before dying. She’s gained a modest fortune and fame as a spy and assassin, however she can never stay in one play too long due to her reputation getting out. Prince John has offered her a pardon and a place in high society if she brings in Robin Hood’s head. Shame she’s fallen in love with his brother Will Scarlet, as that complicates matters.

The Bishop of Hereford - Conservative asshole who supports Prince John’s rule and shares his beliefs on ‘bringing order to the kingdom’. Wants to usurp the Archdeacon as the head of the church. Is Friar Tuck’s and Sister Clara’s arch nemesis.

Dame Brianna DuBois - Also known as the The Black Knight, DuBois is loyal to the throne of England and whoever sits upon it. She’s Prince John’s personal bodyguard and unbeknownst to all a double agent for King Richard who is in hiding. However she is conflicted when her duty places her lover Yua in jeopardy. Yes, she’s totally a butch lesbian.

The Duke of Essex - Prince John’s adviser and right hand man. He only cares for power for power’s sake but is sneaky and conniving and willing to play the long game to get it. He prefers poison to swords, but is surprisingly good at hand to hand combat when cornered. Has a pet snake. It’s the only living thing that he loves.

Elenore of England - Prince John and King Richard’s sister and Maid Marian’s mother. She died when negotiations during a worker dispute turned violent. Unable to quell the people’s rage, she was stuck down during a riot. Richard, blaming himself for losing his temper and causing things to escalate has since tried to follow in her footsteps and become peacemaker. Prince John went the opposite route and blamed the ungrateful peasants (criminals in his mind) and resented Richard for even bothering to negotiating in the first place.

Friar Tuck - The jovial and optimistic heart of the team. He tries to keep everyone’s spirits up and believes that helping people is the ultimate expression of god’s love. Is a hopeless romantic and also very, very gay. He butts heads with more traditional leaders of the church often. He also has a not so secret crush on his best friend Alan.

Guy of Gisbourne - From pauper to nobleman, Guy is Robin’s opposite in everyway. He crawled up from the bottom rung by using and stepping on others and he’s always looking for the opportunity to climb the ranks. Don’t let his foppish ways fool you though, he is both a cunning and ruthless foe and isn’t afraid to get his hands dirty. His latest scheme however is to marry Maid Maiden and become next in line for the throne as Prince John has no other heirs save his ward.

King Richard - Good Richard the Lionhearted is no longer a bloodthirsty crusader in this alternate universe but a peacemaker. He wishes to end wars, not start them, however his more abrasive, uncouth, and impulsive nature can often clash with his loftier goals. Many feel the king would do better to stay at home and tend to domestic matters instead of concerning himself with the conflicts of other far off lands. At the start of the story he has disappeared on one of his diplomatic visits. In reality Prince John has stuck a deal with the king’s enemies and he is currently on the run.

Lady Tiffany - Little John’s little wife and the daughter of the Sherriff of Nottingham. She acts as the gang’s ‘man on the inside’ helping Robin Hood sneak in and out of places and feeding the team needed information. She’s stubborn and spoiled but also very kind hearted. She usually can get her father to give into her demands with just a pout and when that doesn’t work a full on tantum will do. She a woman who knows what she wants and what she wants is her man. Unfortunately daddy dreariest would never approve of their union and so Friar Tuck marries them in secret.

Little John - Robin’s best friend and right hand man. He’s a simple man who loves life’s simple pleasures, good food, good friends, and a good brawl from time to time. He adores his partner, Tiffany and would like nothing more than to marry her for real, in a real church, in front of the whole world. However their relationship must remained hidden from her father, the Sheriff, since the violent lawman would sooner see him hanged then have a thief for a son-in-law.

Lord Locksley - Robin’s and Will’s father. He is arrested for ‘not paying taxes’ but in reality it’s for supporting King Richard and secretly helping the displaced monarch. His arrest leads to Robin and Will becoming outlaws and the series kicks off two years later.

Maid Marian - Prince John’s ward and niece. Her mother died when she was young and her beloved uncle adopted her. Prince John is the only parent she’s ever known and she at first believes him to be a kind and just man. She’s completely oblivious of Prince’s John’s underhanded dealings and oppression of the poor and at first is skeptical of Robin Hood. However as the two grow closer, Marian learns how harsh the real world is and just how much her father figure has lied to her.

Miss Yua - Maid Marian’s lady-in-waiting and best friend. She’s the daughter of Sir Ivanhoe and longs to be a knight as well. She’s a stickler for rules and doesn’t trust Robin Hood and his gang of thieves. At first anyways, over time she too learns of Prince John’s cruelty and even becomes a victim of the tyrant’s schemes. Which puts her in direct conflict with her love, Brianna DuBois.

Much the Miller's Son - born as Midge the miller’s daughter, the young Much longs to be accepted as a boy. As such he’s ditched his dresses, cut his hair, and ran away to Sherwood Forrest in order to be free from society’s expectations. The rest of the merry band accepts Much for who he really is, but at only 13 won’t let him join their gang. He still winds up caught up in their misadventures anyways due to his refusal to listen to anybody, and his determination to get away from his overbearing mother.

Nurse Agnes - Maid Marian’s wet nurse and the closest thing to a mother that she has. Agnes believes in the ‘old ways’ and is very superstitious. She’s also very critical of royalty in general, but is smart enough not to say so out loud. She’s tried to raise Marian into a better person than Prince John, but eventually was dismissed once Marian had come of age. Since leaving the court Agnes has become the witch of the woods and a healer for the poor.

Prince John - The main antagonist. Prince John believes that he needs to bring order to the kingdom of England and feels like his brother King Richard has neglected his duties as ruler and placed the kingdom in danger. He'll do whatever it takes to protect the country including subjecting it’s undesirables.

Robin Hood - Leader of the Merry Band and archer extraordinaire, Robin Hood had to go on the lam when his father was arrest for ‘treason’. While his first priority was to keep his baby brother, Will, safe, the two of them met other outcasts in need over the years have built up an underwound network of rebels who fight against Prince John’s rule. Seemingly suave and cool at first, Robin is actually a bundle of nerves as he tries desperately to keep his friends and family safe...even if it’s mostly from themselves. His world is turned upside down though when he meets the lovely Maid Marian.

Sheriff of Nottingham - The spiteful and cruel sheriff tries to keep the small town of Nottingham under his thumb. He hates Robin Hood and his Merry Band with a passion and sees their continued exitance as a personal insult. The only thing that will deter him from his goal of putting those outlaws in their place is his devotion to his beloved daughters Tiffany. Who distracts him with her seemingly impulsive and shallow whims.

Sir Ivanhoe - A respected knight who once served under King Richard has returned home only to find that his king has not made the journey back as planned. He suspects that Prince John is up to no good, but is afraid to make any risky moves so long as his daughter Yua lives among the court. Her safety is the most important thing in the world to him.

Sister Clara - The resident nerd of Sherwood Forrest and the brains of the team. Clara had joined a convent in order to receive an education and to study science, however her experiments were frowned upon by more traditional leaders of the church, like the Bishop of Hereford. She’s since renounced her monastic vows and has joined Robin Hood’s Merry Band in the pursuit of science! She’s allowed free rein on the sole condition that she doesn’t blow up the camp. She still manages to blow up the camp, at least once a month. Still her inventions are invaluable to the team and she’s absolutely feral with her chim-bombs.

The Trapper - A mysterious hermit who sometimes visits the local pub. He’ll often corner patrons with crazy drunken ramblings and loves to give Robin cryptic prophecies and disjoined ‘clues’ whenever they run into each other. (turns out this is an act and he’s really a spy for King Richard)

Will Scarlett - Robin’s younger brother. Will was 15 when they lost their father and now at 17 wants revenge. He’s a hothead and is constantly picking fights with everyone and anyone. While he is dismissive of Robin’s overprotectiveness, he both loves and admires his brother. Even tries to emulate him in some ways. He also would like to think of himself as a smooth talking clever con artist and ladies man but more often then not his temper gets the better of him. Like most teens he’s obsessed with the latest fashion tends and loves to wear fancy clothes (that he’s usually stolen) He’s favorite article of clothing is his impractical red feathered hat. He’s in love with Azure and is best friends with Much.

#robin hood #robin hood and his merry band

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werewolfsquadron · 4 years

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Hey! You’re my fav rdr fanfic writer. Got any recs now that I’ve worked my way through everything you’ve written! Thanks!

oh gosh, yeah do I have fic recs (and thank you for your kind words about my fics)! Fics are in the order they are in my bookmarks, so they’re pretty much in reverse chronological order. I’ve tagged those authors whom I know are on tumblr, but I’m sure there are others that are here that I just don’t know about.

Morston:

Blackwater - gaslight (@gaslightwestern on tumblr): Noir AU, ongoing but almost finished. Arthur is a private detective, John is a bar owner during prohibition that hires Arthur to look into a murder. Does a super impressive job of capturing the noir tone in writing while not being cheesy about it. Lots of intrigue, mystery, and also Arthur and John being lovable dumbasses. John manages to be a homme fatale while also being his normal impulsive, dumbass self.

Hard times come again no more - dilangley: Arthur survives the end of RDR2, and encounters John again while John is in Mexico during the events of RDR1. Complete. Really unique for Morston in that it takes place when both characters are older, and really well done. You get to watch Arthur and John build a life together, and survive what would normally be the end of their stories. The epilogue made me cry.

I’m a Rover - anotherbird (@the-other-bird on tumblr): I’m a sucker for a post Blessed Are the Peacemakers fics and this is no different. After being suck in camp healing, Arthur decides to go for a ride and John refuses to let him go alone. Oneshot, so complete. Lots of feelings, and Arthur and John being unable to communicate them to each other because they have no emotional literacy. It’s wonderful.

Hell Be Comin’ Round That Mountain - moonoverwings: There’s a frustrating lack of trans Arthur content in general, but especially with Morston, and this is one of the few, if not the only, fics I’ve found that just nails it. It’s ongoing and hasn’t been updated in a bit, so could be abandoned, but what’s there is great and still worth reading. Characters are well written with great characterization, and they really nail the “idiots in love” trope with these two.

Golden day blues - Yuu_chi: Reincarnation AU where John tracks Arthur down after they’ve both been reincarnated into the modern day. Complete. Lots of complicated feelings and struggling with being alive, and the boys fistfight and fuck to deal with it. It’s good.

Nothin’ - helvel: helvel’s got a bunch of great fics, but this is one of my favs. Modern AU where the boys are resting out in a shitty motel room after Blackwater, and things progress from there. Oneshot, so complete. It’s the unsaid and implied emotions, both good and bad, that really make this one for me.

All of Them Wolves - thegoodreverend: AU where Arthur got out of the life earlier, and is living a peaceful life as a trapper up until John shows up in his house. Complete. Not only is this fic emotion heavy and full of the good feelings, but it’s got some excellent banter and John and Arthur feel in character throughout, even though they haven’t met each other before in this AU. This fic is definitely one of my favs.

Charthur:

Lost Country - iridan: A coffee shop AU with a twist. Finished relatively recently. Characters are all so well written, and it doesn’t shy away from the darker or heavier parts of their characters. Arthur is a bartender/reluctant barista at Dutch’s bar/coffee shop, and Charles is a long haul trucker that’s started getting coffee there in the mornings. Arthur owns a small ranch and has a collection of rescue horses, and it’s wonderful.

Come and Lay by My Side - boldlygoingnowherefast: When things start going downhill, Charles convinces Arthur to leave the gang with him just before the bank robbery. Complete. Some wonderful Charthur moments, but also looks into why leaving the gang would be so damn hard for Arthur.

Up Strawberry Way - grantaire_dont_care: Charles and Arthur go on a hunting trip that doesn’t go as planned when they get discovered by O’Driscolls. Complete. I’m a sucker for hurt/comfort, and this has that in spades. Plus some great Charthur moments, especially in terms of having someone who actually cares about Arthur being there when he’s hurt.

Out of the Dark - sky_daybreak (@shady-tavern on tumblr): A time travel fix-it where Arthur gets a chance to start over and try and fix the events of the game (and, y’know, get together with Charles). Complete. Not only does it have so many wonderful moments and heart-to-hearts, but also doesn’t try to pretend that everything can be fix. Some things still go wrong, but there’s happier endings for a vast number of characters, and Arthur gets to see much of his family safe on a ranch together.

Dust and Devils (On My Conscience) - catwrites: An AU where Charles is a werewolf. Oneshot. I’m a sucker for the supernatural, of course, so this is one of my favs. Charles is keeping his werewolf status a secret, but Arthur finds out early in the fic, and that influences and colors what’s to come.

Scars Are For the Living - alliancedogtags: AU where Arthur is shot in the final mission instead, and Charles comes back for him. Complete. Found this originally when I had just beaten the game and was looking for AUs similar to what I already had in my head for BALTWIO, just to see if someone had already done it. Arthur isn’t shot by Dutch in this one, but he does get brought to Charlotte’s place. Lots of sweet moments and that good hurt/comfort, and Charles and Arthur get to live a happy life together, which is the important thing.

gen or other ships:

Blessed Are the Hearts that Bend (They Shall Not Be Broken) - Disishistory: During Blessed Are the Peacemakers, Hosea goes after Arthur when he doesn’t show up after the meeting with Colm, and Micah tags along, which goes about as well as you might expect. Complete. Plenty of tension and hurt, but also has those comfort elements and found family feelings.

Soldier, Poet, King - nerdytf84fan: A long fic that looks at the early years of the gang, from just after Dutch picks up Arthur to, more recently, John’s introduction to the gang and Arthur’s breakup with Mary. Ongoing, but has been pretty steady in terms of updates. As with every fic on this list, the characters are well written and feel like themselves. Also full of found family feelings.

Quest for Arcadia - nerdyft84fan: An Arthur/Albert Mason modern AU fic, where Albert visits Alaska for a photography project and ends up meeting Arthur, who has recently gotten out of prison after taking the fall for one of the gang’s crimes. Complete, and has a second fic full of (relatively) low stakes stories about the epilogue of the fic. Full of both really sweet moments and really heartbreaking moments. Albert still, even in a modern AU, finds himself getting into trouble with the Alaskan wilderness.

If Your Well is Empty - pipdepop (@pipdepop on tumblr): All of pipdepop’s fics are wonderful and definitely worth a read, but this and the second fic in the same series are some of my favorites. When Arthur’s hurting after Eliza and Isaac’s death, Hosea brings home a coonhound puppy to help ease the hurt. Complete, since it’s a oneshot. I’m a sucker for Copper fics, and this one is no different. Plenty of puppy shenanigans, but also some really heartbreaking moments that Copper helps resolve and turn towards healing.

Nothing But A Note In A Symphony - pipdepop: A post Peacemakers fic, where we see each gang member’s thoughts throughout the worst of Arthur’s recovery. Complete. Really heartbreaking at moments, but ultimately really sweet, especially since it ends with a really nice Arthur & John moment, and has a follow up tag about Hosea and Arthur.

Birdshot & Bone - magistrate: John and Arthur try to rob some O’Driscolls, and it does not go well. John breaks his leg, Arthur gets shot, and they get captured. Complete. I’m constantly in awe of magistrate’s characterization, and this has that plus all that wonderful hurt/comfort goodness. Plenty of John and Arthur arguing but ultimately caring about one another.

A Matter of Preservation - charlock221 (@charlock221 on tumblr): An Arthur/Albert Mason fic where Arthur agrees to be a bodyguard for Albert. Complete. Lots of wonderful Arthur and Albert moments, but also some tension as well. Includes hurt/comfort flavor later on in the fic.

Brothers - gaslight: To borrow the fic’s summary, explores John growing up but from Arthur’s perspective. Complete. Really gets in deep with all those complicated emotions of the early years of the gang—from Dutch’s manipulation and Arthur’s feeling put to the side to the way Arthur and John absolutely would die for each other. Plus, there’s John being an absolute wild child which is always a fun ride, especially when you see how that carries into his adulthood.

sorry about the wait! life has been ridiculous and I only now had time to go back through my bookmarks. I’m sure, too, that there are some fics out there that I’ve loved that I just forgot to bookmark, so don’t take this as an exhaustive list. and then, lastly, anyone should feel free to reblog this and add on their own recs—this list is just my taste, but I’m sure there are plenty of other wonderful fics that I either forgot to bookmark, never saw, or just didn’t check out in the first place because I wasn’t in the right headspace at the time.

#long post #rdr2 #fic recs #red dead redemption two #rdr fic recs #not sure if this'll show up in the tags bc of all the links but it's worth a try #ask #anon #text

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sannahofskva · 4 years

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On the latest lore post for the Blind Xisuma AUs, I pretty much stated that the Void Twins can basically kill a god. This is in part a mix of their species, where they’re from, and their family.

This is going to be a long post, so I’m going to be putting it under a readmore. Now, let’s get into it!

So, just what is the Twins’ species?

Well, they’re half demon and half enhanced human. As to why their human half happens to be enhanced gets into their family, and will be talked about later. So, the demon half!

What I use for demon lore happens to be a mix of the Doom games, as well as the Demon Trappers books. The books are probably something most never even heard of, so I’ll explain!

The Demon Trappers series is written by the author, Jana Oliver, and is about an Atlanta that has to deal with demons and necromancers. The main character is a teen named Riley, who wants to follow the steps of her father and trap demons for a living, hence the title of the series. Demons that a demon trapper tends to see are separated into five different grades, going from one (1) to five (5), the difficulty getting higher with each level. There are demons that happen to be higher then a five, but those aren’t ones that are rarely dealt with. They are also unable to touch holy ground (graveyards, houses of worship, etc).

The one that’s most important is the only grade five that happens to be known: the Geo-Fiend. Going by what the series says, this demon is 7-9 feet tall, has ebony skin and curved canine teeth, as well as bull-like horns. The demon is able to create and control weather like tornadoes and windstorms as well as cause earthquakes. This is only possible as long as it’s feet doesn’t touch the ground.

I’m also pretty sure they’re immortal. If not; I’m going to make them immortal anyways! Also, I’m pulling a bit of lore/headcanon from this one Doom fanfic I once read, there’s multiple worlds and, therefore, variations of every demon and person. Like an Earth 1 and Earth 2 thing, but wider scale. Because of this, I made is so that the Twins don’t exactly look like the Geo of the Earth they were born in. I plan on doing another lore post that will be more about this.

Xisuma and Xizara are half Geo-Fiend, since they’re, ya know, identical. The angrier they get and/or the more they use their powers, the more apparent that their demon side gets. This means horns, sharper teeth, and the colors of their eyes switch color (red pupil and black iris for Ex, purple pupil and black iris for X). These powers are also the reason why they are able to hurt and almost kill gods. Also due to being half demon, the Twins are close to near on immortal. It is possible for them to be injured as well as killed, but it’s much harder to do so.

Now, where are the Twins from?

Well, they’re from the Doom game! Well, Earth. Like with the the Uncle Vega AU by @/ambered-glazed-sheep, the Twins are science experiments that the scientist, Samuel Hayden, made in an attempt to get his own Doom Slayer. Instead of getting just one, he got two instead.

A British scientist was in charge of the Twins’ upkeep and health, making sure they stay inline and that the others know which Twin is which. Xizara, the older of the two, was referred to as A, while Xisuma was referred to as B. Usually, they were forced to wear a collar necklace with a label.

And finally, their family tree!

Other then the Void Twins, there are two others that I can confirm that they’re related to: their mother (Sam Grimm) and her twin brother (John Grimm, aka Doom Guy). Well, that’s about it. Sorta. The scientist sorta counts, since he raised them and treated them better then the others. He was kind of a surrogate father.

The Twins have never met their uncle, nor have they properly met their mother. They were separated from Sam not long after they were born, and were raised in a different part of the facility. For those of you who played (or currently playing) the Doom Eternal game, it’s the same one Hayden is at.

#hermitcraft headcanon #hermitcraft au #blind xisuma aus #blind xisuma aus lore #xisumavoid #evil xisuma

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leonardcohenofficial · 4 years

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But are they the long johns from the long john flap 🤔 BJ jokes like I’ll pay you for those long johns Hawk’s like lol this reminds me of trapper and BJ’s like “now I am 100% serious I will pay you” and Hawk’s like ohhhkaaaay so BJ buys them and puts them on and does those weird stretches like “these long johns will now remind you ONLY OF ME and MY ASS”

the MASH episode in which BJ decides he needs to emulate scott pilgrim

#bj hunnicutt #mash #tv: mash #BJ: i'm in lesbians with you and i WILL fill out these longjohns better than one trapper john mcintyre #anon

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the--blackdahlia · 4 years

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So Long Old Buddy

Title: So Long Old Buddy

Summary: Hawkeye gets a package from Boston.

Warnings: It’s kinda a tearjerker guys

AN: In the MASH Matters podcast, a writer for the show talks about how he trolled the writers for Trapper John MD by saying he was going to write an episode of Hawkeye going to pieces learnings of the death of his old friend Trapper. Well, here you go!

“Nothing like a quiet day to enjoy the three m’s,” Hawkeye said as he lounged on his cot. BJ looked over from his own, raising an eyebrow.

“Okay, and what exactly are the three m’s?”

“Martinis, mellow atmosphere and...more martinis.”

“All the things in life you need.” BJ laughed.

“Right!” Hawkeye laughed. BJ shook his head as Radar came in, mail bag over his shoulder. “Well, if it isn’t Mr. Radar. Come to partake in our mellow atmosphere?”

“I don’t think he can do the two m’s.” BJ commented.

“What?” Radar asked, confused. “Is it because I’m short?”

“Nothing, nothing,” Hawkeye laughed. “Got anything good for us?”

“Letters for Captain Hunnicutt,” Radar handed him his letters, which he quickly drove into. “A letter from your dad Hawkeye, and a package from Boston.”

“Boston?” Hawkeye asked. “I think I once knew a girl from Boston.”

“Was she related to the man from Nantucket?” BJ asked without looking up from his letter.

“Oh god I hope so,” Hawkeye smirked.

“What?” Radar asked.

“I’ll explain when you’re older.” Hawkeye laughed, to which Radar glared and marched out. Hawkeye laid the letter from his dad to the side and looked at the brown wrapped package. It was addressed to him. He wasn’t sure who it could be from, until he saw the return address in the corner.

The McIntyre’s.

“Ah ha!” Hawkeye laughed. “Oh, that old son of a bitch!”

“What? Who?” BJ asked.

“Trapper! This package is from him!” HAwkeye said excitedly. “God, what could it be? Knowing him, he probably stuffed it full of paper and put a chocolate bar in it or something.” BJ just laughed as Hawkeye tore into the box.

There was brown paper in it, and on top of it was a letter in an envelope. Hawkeye took the envelope and opened it.

Captain Pierce,

You probably don’t really know me outside of stories that John has told you. And who knows what kind of things he said then. My name is Louise McIntyre, and I’m John’s wife. I wasn’t sure how to best tell you this, so I just thought I’d write you a letter, because I’m not sure if I could find it in myself to utter the words.

John was in Chicago for a job interview. A very nice position at a hospital in the heart of the city. Becky, Kathy, and our son JT were there with him. He had gone to the hospital while myself and the kids went to have a day in the city. John never came back. He was hit by an impaired driver when he went to go at a stop light. The driver hit his side of the car, trapping him inside. John only survived about twelve hours afterwards. I’m sorry I have to tell you. I really wish I didn’t have to. I sent you a few things of John’s that I thought you would want. I don’t expect a letter back.

All the best,

Louise McIntyre

Hawkeye let the letter slip from his hands as he stared forward. BJ noticed a change in the tent and looked up from his own letter, a frown on his face when he saw Hawkeye’s face.

“Hawk?” He asked. “You okay?”

“T-Trapper…”

“What?”

“Trapper’s dead.” Hawkeye finally said it. He didn’t think he’d be able to, but he did. “Oh god.”

“Oh man.” BJ moved to sit by him. “What happened?”

“Car accident in Chicago.” Hawkeye whispered. “He got hit.” BJ nodded and moved the box so he could properly sit on Hawkeye’s cot.

“That big of a box for a death letter?” BJ asked. Hawkeye snapped out of his daze and took the box, pulling back the brown paper to look inside. There wasn’t much in there. Trapper’s pair of glasses with the fake nose were in there, which made Hawkeye laugh.

“I got us each a pair of these from a little booth in Seoul,” Hawkeye smiled fondly, even though BJ could see the tears in his eyes. “These came in handy during many pranks.” Hawkeye paused for a moment. “He wore these for a whole day when Tommy Gillis died on my table.”

“Who’s Tommy Gillis?”

“My childhood best friend.” Hawkeye closed his eyes for a second before setting the glasses back in the box and pulling out the next item. A single dog tag. “John F. X. McIntrye.” BJ watched as Hawkeye ran his thumb over the cool metal before laying it back in the box. Just a few things remained, most of them pictures. They were things that Trapper took back with him to remember Hawkeye by. Pictures of the two of them smiling, laughing, annoying Frank, and other things. BJ watched as Hawkeye started to laugh and told him stories behind the pictures. The way he told everything made BJ feel like he had been there, like he knew Trapper as well.

Finally, as Hawkeye was about to put the pictures back in the box, he saw an envelope. He was addressed to him, with Trapper’s name and return address on it, with no stamp. Pulling it out, he opened it, almost dreading what it said.

Hey Hawkeye,

I bet you’re still wondering why I didn’t leave a letter behind or anything. I tried, but I just couldn’t. I didn’t want it to feel like I was saying goodbye, because when you get home, I’m coming to Crabapple Cove and dragging you to a football game. I know how much you like those. But there will be beer, and hey, you could bring some of that good stuff back in the thermos I left behind.

I’ve been sitting here in this office for a little bit, not sure what to write. Louise and I had a little boy nine months after I got back home. He’s named after his old man, so I guess he’s going to be the best looking kid in his school. Also, the girls say hi. They saw a picture of us that I have sitting in my office. I think Becky has a crush on you. Her cheeks get all pink and she runs off. They’re growing up so fast. I can’t wait for you to meet them.

I hope you don’t mind, but I went over to Crabapple Cove and met your dad. We had lunch, and he seemed to enjoy the stories I told him. Don’t worry, I kept the really scandalous ones away from him. Don’t want him thinking I’m a bad influence or something. He’s really a cool cat, but you knew that already, because he is your dad after all. He said he’s proud of you, he misses you, and his lobster bisque just doesn’t taste the same without you.

Anyway, I need to be going. We’re going to pick up a new car here soon. Louise wanted a Ford, I wanted a Chevy, so we compromised and got a Ford. Anyway, I’ll be seeing you when you get back to the world. Don’t be surprised if I kiss you in the airport.

So long old buddy,

Trapper

And that’s when it hit. The tears were heavy down Hawkeye’s face. Fat tears full of pain. He was supposed to be safe over there. There wasn’t a war going on three miles from where he slept. He was supposed to watch his kids grow up. He was supposed to lose those curls due to old age.

He was supposed to take Hawkeye to a football game to drink beer and pretend they had met someplace, anyplace else.

But instead, all Hawkeye could do was cry.

****

A week later, Radar had music playing over the PA as Hawkeye sat in his chair, reading a book. It was a beautiful day outside, and some of the guys were playing a game. BJ opened the door to the Swamp.

“Come on Hawk. I need some more muscle on my team.”

“I thought you had Margaret.” Hawkeye mumbled, not looking up.

“Yeah, well she got mad at me and defected to Igor’s side. Come on.” BJ sighed. “I’ll do your laundry next week if we win.”

“Now you’re talking.” Hawkeye shut his book and got up as Vera Lynn’s “We’ll Meet Again” played over the PA. With his lucky Hawaiian shirt on, Hawkeye grabbed his favorite hat from his cot, smiling for a moment at the framed picture of him and Trapper, before he followed BJ out.

#mash #fanfiction #trapper john #hawkeye #hawkeye pierce #trapper john mcintyre #4077 #alan alda #wayne rogers

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womanfromblackwater · 4 years

Text

Birthday Fic

Little birthday-themed fic focusing on Arthur and John’s brotherly bond. Of course, it’s all John’s birthday bc I found out way too late that yesterday was Roger’s, but enjoy!

Thirteen

From the moment he saw the small figure hunched at the side of the camp, Arthur knew something was wrong. The little urchin Dutch and Hosea had brought back a few months past usually spent his time getting into everything around the camp, seeing how much he could squirrel away in his tent before anyone noticed. If not that he was pestering Arthur. The kid wanted to copy everything he did and had no respect for Arthur’s time or personal space. Sitting on a rock staring off across the prairie was definitely not one of his usual activities. Silently hoping that the kid wasn’t getting sick, Arthur had gone about his day, until he noticed that by mid afternoon John still hadn’t moved. A part of him- most of him if he was being honest- was tempted to leave him there, let him sort out his own problems. But the small part that made him ________ took over, and he found himself walking over to the kid against his better judgement.

“You okay, boy?”

Startled, John visibly flinched at his voice, before quickly squaring his shoulders and putting on what Arthur thought of as his “tough guy scowl.” It was not especially intimidating coming from the skinny kid.

“I’m fine.”

“You ain’t. If you was fine you wouldn’t be over here. So, I’m gonna sit right here until you tell me what’s goin’ on.”

He plopped himself down on the grass, wondering why he was doing this but unable to make himself get up and walk away. John crossed his arms across his chest and turned his head away, but didn’t get up. Arthur guessed five minutes before the kid spilled his guts. John held out for ten before the tears he had been fighting started to run down his cheeks.

“I’m thirteen today.”

“Well, happy birthday, kid. That ain’t nothing to cry about.”

“That’s thirteen years my ma ain’t here. Pa always said I killed her. She made good money, too. It was my fault Pa lost his best girl. He coulda been rich.”

Arthur took a deep breath, not sure what to say. John never talked about his life before the gang, only said he was on his own since he was eight. Now he guessed he knew why.

“Hey, that ain’t… that ain’t your fault. You didn’t do nothing. It happens, boy. Ain’t nice, but it happens.”

He wrapped an arm around the kid’s shoulders, surprised when John didn’t fight him and just leaned into his side.

“You got a family now. Ain’t much of one, but we’re here.”

“I guess.”

The tears had stopped, and Arthur gave the boy’s shoulders a squeeze before getting up, brushing dirt off his jeans.

“Make sure you’re back for dinner. Hosea’ll worry if he knows you were out here all day.”

Having gotten a small nod, Arthur strode back to the main camp and saddled his horse. John could be whiny and aggressive and annoying, but he felt bad for the kid. Least he could do was get him a present. Probably the first one of his life.

Later that night, Arthur knew he’d done the right thing. It was way too big on John, but something had told him that the boy was meant to have it. His eyes were barely visible under the brim of the white gambler hat, but he had refused to take it off since he had opened the sloppily wrapped package. Arthur smiled to himself. He’d grow into it.

Twenty-Two

Giving a last wave to the trapper, Arthur rode off with the package secured behind him. He’d watched John shiver through the winter, too stubborn to ask for a heavier jacket and spending all his own money on presents for the girl Uncle had brought into camp. John had proudly declared that she didn’t charge him anymore, that soon enough she’d be only his, but Arthur figured that didn’t mean much when his lips were tinged with blue and he was practically sitting in the campfire to keep warm in a blizzard. The idea of the man he’d come to think of as a brother going through another cold snap like that had given Arthur the idea for his birthday gift. The ox leather had been easy to come by, the coyote had taken several nights of hunting, but it was worth it to see the result.

He arrived at camp to find the celebration already in full swing, despite it only being mid-afternoon. Arthur had always gotten a special meal and presents, but Dutch doted on John, and his birthday was second only to Christmas as the gang’s biggest party of the year. Hating that much attention himself, Arthur didn’t mind the arrangement.

John was sitting on the edge of a wagon, laughing with Bill and Uncle and already deep into his fourth drink. Arthur had been right, he had grown into the hat, although the white had become a deep tan after nearly a decade of use. Figuring he may as well give him his present while he was sober enough to appreciate it, he pulled the package off of Boadicea and headed over.

“Hey, kid, havin’ a good day?” He slung an arm around the smaller man’s shoulders, the closest to a hug John would allow.

“Sure. Hosea let me sleep till noon, so I’d say it’s a good one. They won’t let me near the chuckwagon, so I guess Pearson got something good, too. How you been?”

“Fine, fine. Got this for ya.” He handed over the neatly folded brown paper.

“Shit, Arthur, you didn’t need to go this big. Uncle here got me a half-full box of bullets. Pretty sure he pulled it off your wagon.”

Uncle stood up taller.

“Hey, those is gonna save your life one day, boy. You’ll be thankin’ ol’ Uncle then!”

They all laughed as John tore back the paper on Arthur’s gift. His genuine smile warmed Arthur’s heart. John was usually either dead serious or drunkenly cackling. Honest happiness from him was rare. He ran his fingers through the soft fur of the jacket’s lining, admiring for a moment before looking up to Arthur.

“Thank you, brother. For real, thank you.”

“Aw, was nothin’. Now we don’t all have to listen to you and your chatterin’ teeth next time we head north.” He gave John a playful shove and steered him towards the campfire, where the rest of the gang was staring to gather for a rare night of relaxation.

Twenty-Six

“Hey, you up yet?”

Arthur could see through the gaping hole in the wall that he was, but figured John would appreciate the knock more than just barging in.

“Yep. You can come in.”

John was slumped in a chair, half-finished coffee in his hands. Dark circles under his eyes showed the toll the past few weeks had taken. Losing Sean, losing Jack and the fight to get him back, settling in at a new camp- they were all stressed and exhausted. Only Jack, looking up to wave at Arthur from his spot on the floor, happily playing with his toy horse, seemed to be truly okay.

“Just wanted to wish you many happy returns of the day.”

“What?”

Eyebrows furrowed in confusion, John stared at Arthur, who remained silent until John’s eyes widened in realization.

“Jesus, I hadn’t even been keeping track. Already?”

“What is it, Pa?” Jack asked, climbing up into John’s lap. Arthur answered for him.

“It’s your pa’s birthday. Gettin’ old, he is.”

“Really? Is there gonna be a cake?” Jack’s eyes lit up. He still wasn’t exactly sure what a birthday was, but he knew that whenever somebody had one there were treats, and for his there had been presents.

“I don’t think so, Jack. We all got a lot going on right now, we’re not gonna have a party right in the middle of it.”

He was right, Arthur knew that, but a part of him remembered how hard it had been to get John to acknowledge his birthday in the first place, and he didn’t want to let that go. An idea forming, he held out his arms to Jack.

“Come on, Jack. Let’s give your pa some space. John, I’m borrowin’ your kid.”

John nodded, smiling at the giggle that Jack gave as Arthur picked him up and spun him around. Even though they’d all had hard times lately, Arthur seemed to be handling it better than he was. Jack deserved that, not sitting around in a rotting house watching his father brood all day.

Arthur had planned carefully, so by the time John returned from his chores around camp everything was done. They had spread a blanket across the floor for a picnic, and he, Jack, and Abigail sat around it, a small cake from a bakery in Saint Denis in the center. John was shocked.

“Didn’t think we were gonna just let the day go by, did ya? Come sit down.” Arthur cut cake for all of them, pointedly ignoring the shine of tears in John’s eyes. A kiss from Abigail and a bear hug from Jack had him relaxed enough to enjoy their small party. When Arthur rose to go, he handed John a folded piece of paper.

“Happy birthday, kid.”

Arthur didn’t know it, but John kept the drawing of himself, Abigail, and Jack tucked in his satchel whenever he had to be away from camp, admiring how Arthur had captured Jack’s smirk, the light in Abigail’s eyes, and how he’d made them look like a real family.

Thirty-Four

John’s first birthday in his new home had been a success, if he did say so himself. Abigail had insisted on Uncle and Jack taking over his chores, while the two of them had hidden the flour to prevent her from even attempting to bake. It had been a peaceful day spent lounging on his own porch, looking out over the sunlight on his own land. It was only when dinner was finished and Uncle and Jack had gone to bed that he felt a twinge of sadness. It came every year, the reminder that Arthur hadn’t been here to share the day with him. The hat from his first year with the gang had been lost in the flight from Beaver Hollow, replaced with Arthur’s own, which was tucked in a drawer in the wardrobe, the family portrait Arthur had drawn inside of it. He still wore the jacket, even though there were few truly cold days in New Austin, even in the winter. He supposed his new life had been Arthur’s last gift, and he hoped he would be proud of what John was doing with it. As he watched a blue jay hop across the railing, closer to his hand than most animals would dare to go, John figured he was.

#rdr2 #red dead redemption 2 fanfiction #arthur morgan #john marston #birthdays

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