#Optimus got all the power in the world here and he's gonna use it to help people

[transingthoseformers]

OPTIMUS

Optimus if you do this I will kiss you on the mouth, holy shit mech this is amazing

[krinsbez]

BattleTech+Transformers, Worldbuilding/Storybuilding, hopefully Collaborative

OK, so the lack of response to Battletech+Pern is worrisome, since it got more votes, but I’m gonna try anyways. Hopefully the fact that I’ve got more material will make the difference.

So, before I get into story details, for purposes of the story, I needed TFs to be able to wreck ‘Mechs. My justification is that they’re the product of vastly more advanced technology that sometimes crosses the line into Clarke-tech. More specifically, while TFs are stronger and more durable than a Mech of comparable size and weight, the difference isn’t that great and most Mechs are bigger than most TFs, and also there are a lot more Mechs thatn TFs. However, TFs are vastly faster and more agile (not having to worry about carrying a squishy organic inside helps), their more efficient energy systems mean they don’t overheat, storage dimensions not only allow for size-changing but also means they can store more ammo and don’t have to worry about said ammo exploding, etc. In addition, TF weapons tend to pack more punch, and also frequently have all sorts of exotic effects (glass gas, null rays, etc. etc.), many TFs have what amounts to superpowers (invisibility, duplication, Combining, etc), loads of them can fly, and of course they can Transform, which enhances their existing their mobility advantage, allows for surprise attacks, and also means they can store more weaponry in their frame since they can transform one weapon into another. In addition to the TFs themselves, they have better HPG and KF-drives (of course, they don’t call their drives that, but for our purposes we’re saying Transformers that’s what they use), and they also have SpaceBridges (this is Battletech, gotta use CamelCase! Which means we’re calling them AutoBots and DeceptiCons).

OK, story stuff. I usually like to imagine the Great War as a stalemate, but here I’m going to say that, mostly because Sentinel Prime was not good at war, by the time Optimus became Prime, the Cons had an overwhelming advantage, and Optimus was eventually forced to go into hiding, allowing the Cons to think the Bots were defeated. This is not the case, and he’s been honing them into a lean, mean Con-fighting machine, but they don't have the numbers to win in a straight-up fight and so are biding their time waiting for the right moment. Meanwhile, the Cons have been rampaging through the galaxy, conquering everything in sight. This has actually been fairly bad for them, as the brutal way they go about things means that their conquests tend to be either too wrecked to be much use (dead worlds don’t produce a lot of Energon) or are hotbeds of insurgency. Or were hotbeds of insurgency and then were wrecked. However,, between their poisonous ideology and the training and tactics Megatron used to achieve those initial overwhelming victories against Sentinel, the Cons have developed a toxic culture where even those who aren’t sadists or bloodthirsty maniacs or sadistic bloodthirsty maniacs are peer-pressured into acting as if they crave constant ultraviolence. And since no one’s been able to give them a good straight-up fight in ages, they inevitably end up fighting each other. Meanwhile, although Megatron is a powerful and skilled warrior, a brilliant tactician, and a charismatic master of demagoguery, he is absolute SCRAP as a leader, who gets his way through bullying and intimidation, so that the higher-ups are constantly intriguing against backstabbing each other. All of this has led to a massive drop in morale and a near-total collapse of discipline.

Which is why the Inner Sphere is a godsend. Megatron can’t take any aliens seriously as threats for ideological reasons, especially ones that are both squishy AND stubby, but Mechs mean that they can give his warriors a good enough fight to maybe whip them back into shape and give him a plausible way of getting rid of some of the particularly troublesome ones. And it’s big and populated enough that the Cons will be able to slaughter to their heart’s content and still have a sizable population of slave labor afterwards. So, for decades, the Cons have been infiltrating the IS, gathering intelligence; mostly about what targets should NOT be wrecked because again, Megatron doesn’t really take humans seriously as a potential threat.

And when the day comes (roundabouts 3065-6, late stage FedCom Civil War), the Cons strike like lightning, attacking every sector at once, crushing all opposition with superior technology and the element of surprise. This no doubt sounds familiar, but unlike the Clans before them, the Cons have no concern about honor or preserving civilian lives. The opposite, in fact. As they assault world after world, they unleash carnage on a scale not seen since the First Succession War, proudly broadcasting their atrocities for all to see.  In addition, while the Clans were restricted to a relatively small wedge of an invasion corridor, the Cons can SpaceBridge themselves anywhere in the Inner Sphere, not to mention the long-hidden spies revealing themselves and wreaking havoc. Megatron is well aware that the Inner Sphere is too big for his forces to maintain a blitzkrieg for very long, even with their numbers enhanced by mass-produced VehiCons and Drones, but he figures on terrifying the locals into submission before things reach that point.

And his plan is working. Until the AutoBots intervene, showing up on world after world to reinforce the beleaguered defenders and turn back DeceptiCon attacks, giving the people of the Inner Sphere some breathing room and showing that the invaders are not invincible. And then Optimus Prime contacts the leaders of every major faction, and offers an alliance…OK, so I am not quite sure where things go from there, but what I envision is not just the ‘Cons being driven from the Inner Sphere and a return to status quo antebellum. I imagine the AutoBots joining the Second Star League and proving to be the secret sauce that makes it work the way it was promised. I’m figuring on Optimus being declared First Lord on a permanent basis and leading the new SLDF on a crusade to liberate all the worlds Megatron has conquered, including Cybertron, ultimately raising the banner of the Star League above Darkmount itself. I admit to not being clear on how to get there, though.

I do have various fragments of ideas for things, but as I am not really familiar with the characters of BT, I don’t quite know how to make them all gel together, and I worry some of my ideas won’t work. Anyways, in no particular order, some of these (I reserve the right to post more).

-The Cons will be converting captured Mech factories into making Drones, the Bots will be sharing tech that enables the creations of…I’m tentatively calling them CyberMechs or AutoMechs, and there will be enough BattleMechs being given Sparks to create at least one team each of BattleCons and MechBots. No idea on details.

-During the period when the ‘Con blitzkrieg seemed unstoppable, Sun-Tzu Liao got…some kind of offer from Swindle, which being something of a weasel and also rather desperate, he agrees to. Not sure of the specifics, but the fact that he technically betrayed humanity is eventually used as a lever to get him to agree to the Prime Lord thing.

-After reluctantly agreeing to call a truce with her brother, and to ally with the AutoBots, Mad Kat, like everyone else allied to the Bots, is given intel on the ‘Con leadership and because she’s Mad Kat, decides to approach Starscream, offering to help him take out Megatron so he can rule the DeceptiCons and she can rule the Inner Sphere. Predictably, this eventually blows up in her face.

-I was initial thinking that Optimus sends a high-ranking ‘Bot to every major faction leader (not sure who gets sent to whom) inviting them to a meeting somewhere to discuss forming an alliance against the Cons, etc. Not sure who gets sent where, or where the meeting should take place. I considered the idea of having the meeting held via telepresence somehow, but I want to have the Steiner-Davions in the same room, and also Vlad Ward and Phelan Kell and etc., cuz I think it would be interesting.

-Thought; both sets of Wolves join the anti-Decepticon coalition, and the feuding between them causes friction. Eventually, Grimlock bullies them into agreeing to settle it via a Trial between Phelan and Vlad. The winning side earns the right to be Clan Wolf, the losers ultimately end up becoming Clan DinoBot. No idea who should win or if this is any way plausible.

-Speaking of Clanners, some of the Homeworld Clans are reluctant to join the fight, even though protecting the Inner Sphere from outside threats is theoretically why the Clans exist. So, Ultra Magnus (I’m thinking something akin to the Transformers Prime version as voiced by Michael Ironside, although I’m imagining him having something like the Magnus Hammer from Transformers Animated) challenges their Khans and saKhans to a Batchall, offering his body for their Scientists to dissect as a prize if they win. If he wins…I’m not sure if they have to just help fight the Con, fully join the Second Star League, or accept Autobot command. Regardless he wins quite handily. Not sure who he has to fight, either.

-At some point, HeadMaster (and TargetMaster, and PowerMaster) tech is invented. If anyone has ideas for who should volunteer for which and be binary-bonded with whom, I’m all ears, though I do have a generic idea. To wit, at this point the ComStar schism has happened but the Wobbies haven’t lost their shit and started doing all the atrocities. I’m imagining that, given their technophilia, a lot of them agree to be binary bonded, and enough AutoBot ideology bleeds through from their partners that it causes a schism within the WoB, with a bunch of them seeing Optimus as a messianic figure and turning on the others, so the whole organization is quietly purged of its most batshit and/or evil elements and ends up on the side of the angels, albeit coming there from a weird angle. Also, means another faction stumping for the Prime Lord plan.

-Note that some of the bigger Bots and Cons will be becoming DropShips. Or at least, they will look like DropShips; they are actually Jump-capable, and possibly also some of the ones that become ASFs. Metroplex and Trypticon will become WarShips; I envision the Ark and Nemesis as also being WarShips. Possibly also the Axalon and DarkSyde.

-I think this is pretty much it that I can remember. Thanks to the guys at Spacebattles who helped me work a lot of this stuff out before they got bored with the idea. Any questions or suggestions anyone and everyone has are welcome, though I can’t promise to use ‘em.

[talesofsonicasura]

Herald of Ruin

Hello everyone. It's been awhile since I made a post here. Tumblr isn't exactly making things easy especially because I finally gotten asks after so long. And guess who got a glitch which makes it impossible to edit said asks much less one that still hasn't been solved in days?

Nevermind the details although since that isn't the focus. I got plagued with a new AU idea which wouldn't leave me alone. Thus this particular post.

We all know about Optimus Prime. The heroic leader of the Autobots, a kind and gentle mech who battles those that dare threaten the peace. Yet one part of him we really see is his humble origin as Orion Pax. The bot before the war truly war began.

In multiple iterations, Orion is depicted as a dock worker, a miner, or for this AU Prime's archivist version. What do I have in store for him? Let's begin. (Part 2 can be found here.)

Orion Pax didn't exactly know where he was. It definitely ain't Cybertron from the vibrant greenery, bright blue sky and the peculiar fauna that roamed around him. An organic world instead of metal.

His memory core being a massive mess didn't help either. Orion could access some datas like who he is, where he came from, his function, and even a few individuals but everything else is engulfed by errors. All the archivist could do at the moment was walk.

Thus Orion Pax took his first steps into this strange colorful world. A directionless path past red cliffs, small pools of water, and the various wildlife that watched from a distance in curiosity. It all led to a peculiar metallic emblem embedded in the one such cliff.

A large vault that bear an eerie vibrant purple symbol that glowed as if reacting to him. Without word, Orion Pax approach the strange landmark. His vision flashing constantly to a dark abyss that held a faint blue light before his outstretched servo.

Time began to stretch into constant flashes until contact been made. Orion Pax barely blinked before he found himself on the ground back to the colorful world around him. And it didn't take long to see amber eyes peer down his optics.

Narrow gaze full of skeptical curiosity in what embodies a pure ancient grudge woven in wooden tablets decorated by dead leaves. The kind which had Orion remembering a phrase hidden by broken processor. Knowledge is power. A treasure that can bring peace...

Or RuIn.

Yup. We are delving into the world of Pokemon as Orion Pax just encounter the Ruinous Tablets: Wo-Chien. In Scarlet and Violet, there are four unique seals scattered across the region. These contain the Treasures of Ruin, powerful Pokemon that brought disaster onto Paldea long long ago.

Wo-Chien is the wooden tablets used by a grudge filled scribe to write the deeds of a corrupt king. The Pokemon doesn't attack Orion for one sheer reason: curiosity. It never seen anything like the archivist before.

The potential of untold knowledge leads to an unspoken alliance between the two. Something which later evolves into a powerful bond. Orion names the Wo-Chien 'Blackbox'. (Black boxes are devices that record and contain important data.)

It doesn't take long until the two come across a Pokemon Trainer named Roc. (This trainer fills the main character role for Scarlet/Violet.) After a misunderstanding which involves a language barrier and mistaking a Cybertronian for a Pokemon, Orion Pax's path is laid.

Travel the Paldea region alongside Roc, maybe even help him on his journey. By doing this he could piece together the answers to what led him here and maybe get back home. For now Orion learns about this strange new world.

Travelling across Paldea is gonna require a mix of alt mode, holoform and alternate fuel sources. Orion's alt mode is gonna be a cargo truck since my headcanon height for him is 19 ft. As for alternate fuel, it takes the forms of Tera Shards.

These shards are crystallized energy only found in the Paldea region and responsible for a phenomenon known as Terastallization. Roc made a desperate attempt to save a energy drained Orion by having him consume a Dark Tera Shard. These items become vital for the Cybertronian until he can fully perfect a recipe for Synthetic Energon. Success varies.

For Pokemon, Orion only catches those who wish to join him unless a situation calls for it. Like the safety of the creature in question that leads to no other option. Otherwise Orion leaves them be. The same goes for battling as well with the exception of spars.

Our archivist will have a team like any other trainer and I'll be going over the main ones. His signature team basically. Let's start with Orion's first Pokemon.

Blackbox: Wo-Chien

Type: Dark/Grass Nature: Serious Tera: Dark

Ability: Tablets of Ruin- reduce the ATK of all other Pokemon on the field.

Moves: Growth, Ruination, Giga Drain, Dark Pulse

This grumpy book snail of a Wo-Chien prefers to quietly read and nap in peace. He's not above using his ability to intimidate someone if irritated enough. Blackbox isn't fully heartless though as he cares for Orion alongside his close companions in subtle ways. Harm them and this Wo-Chien will drain those offenders dry.

Purrlee: Purugly

Type: Normal Nature: Jolly Tera: Ground

Ability: Defiant - Boosts Attack when stats lowered.

Moves: Play Rough, Hone Claws, Dig, Bulldoze

Orion's second Pokemon, this Tiger Cat is surprisingly very friendly, snuggly and energetic despite the species. She was abandoned by her former Trainer after evolving from Glameow. Purrlee has a tendency to bowl over others for surprise nuzzles. No one stops her though, not even Blackbox.

Vos: Gligar

Type: Ground/Flying Nature: Impish Tera: Poison

Ability: Hyper Cutter- Prevents Attack from lowering

Moves: Cross Poison, Swords Dance, Bulldoze, Fire Fang

A wild glutton who serves as Orion's third Pokemon. He joined the team back when he was a Gligar that gotten lost from his group and slept in the archivist's cabin. Vos' name is coined from a lost memory that the Pokemon had accidentally triggered. He loves sleeping in Orion's cabin or hang off him like a perch.

Shard: Quaquaval *Shiny

Type: Water/Fighting Nature:Timid Tera: Ice

Ability: Moxie- boosts Attack for each Pokemon they defeat

Moves: Aqua Step, Ice Spinner, Counter, Hurricane

Orion's fourth Pokemon is a shy dancer who wishes to perfect her craft. Shard started as a very timid Quaxly who evolves over the span of the adventure. The dual type has gain more confidence upon becoming a Quaquaval but still hides behind Orion if spooked.

Noctis: Grimmsnarl

Type: Dark/Fairy Nature: Naughty Tera: Fairy

Ability: Pickpocket - Steals an item if physically attacked

Moves: Spirit Break, Play Rough, Drain Punch, Crunch

A loyal yet mischievous powerhouse that became Orion's fifth Pokemon. He started as a self destructive chaotic Morgrem who absolutely loathe the archivist until one fateful incident led to Noctis not only evolving into Grimmsnarl but try to better himself. The dual type still pull pranks, thankfully these aren't as dangerous like back then.

Vector Prime: Steelix *Can Mega Evolve

Type: Steel/Ground Nature: Gentle Tera: Steel

Ability: Sturdy - Cannot be knocked out with 1 hit KOs

Moves: Dragon Dance, Iron Tail, Psychic Fangs, Metal Burst

A mysterious Pokemon that can sense space-time anomalies serves as Orion's sixth Pokemon. Vector is a grandfatherly soul who tends to dote on everyone and provide comfort or wisdom if needed. His name stems from a triggered memory like Vos. Vector can mega evolve with the Steelixite Orion earned if need be.

Crimson: Koraidon

Type: Dragon/Fighting Nature: Hasty Tera: Dragon

Ability: Orichalcum Pulse -Turns the sunlight harsh when entering battle. The ancient energy thrumming through this Pokemon boosts it's Attack in harsh sunlight.

Moves: Collision Course, Iron Head, Dragon Claw, Shadow Claw

A hyperactive and affectionate Legendary that is Orion's emotional support Pokemon. He was entrusted to the archivist by Professor Sada as a Ride Pokemon, although she's unaware of him not being human. Crimson spends most his time munching on sandwiches and making others laugh than battling. Doesn't mean the Koraidon is unable to curb stomp those who wish to cause trouble.

I can't forget about Orion's human companion. Roc is a 23 year old trainer who tends to be quite carefree but also equally reckless. He aspires to be a Frontier Brain and run his own facility. To do so, he must compete in the Battle Frontier which will pit him against trainers who can match even Pokemon League champions in skill or strength.

Roc explores various regions to gain experience that could aid in his quest. He accidentally mistook Orion for a Pokemon on their first meeting and it took Blackbox stealing the man's Rotomphone to stop the fight from escalating. (There's a language barrier which can be resolved by the data inside the device.)

Roc is an enabler when it comes to Orion. From the limited info he got out of the bot's fragmented memory, the young man felt angry about how his new friend lived back on Cybertron. Something Roc decides to rectify by giving Orion a chance to experience life.

It does put a dent in his wallet but the price is worth it when the archivist gets to attend a carnival or read whatever book he wants. Orion tries to pay him back however Roc usually refuses. The time he doesn't is by asking to learn stuff from the bot in exchange.

Such things consist of reading/writing/understanding Cybertronian, history and other subjects on the planet that isn't functionalism. Roc's penmanship definitely approved upon trying to write Orion's language. He did roll his eyes when the bot mistook his handwriting for 'clocker' scratch. (Cybertronian Chicken)

I will be drawing Roc. For holoform design, either design my own or use the TFA version. Orion Pax is participating in all the events of the main Scarlet/Violet game and Teal Mask/Indigo Disk DLC alongside my OC except for the Pokemon League. Now this is the first half of my AU explanation.

The second will delve into the Transformers side and why it's called 'Herald of Ruin'. Do know that Orion Pax is gonna be quite different from his canon counterpart throughout this. I will drive a wedge between them and see how the character can molded.

That's all I got for now! Until next time folks, I'll see you back in Paldea. Now transform and roll out! Here's a Trainer Card that I made on Pokecharms.com for Orion Pax and Crimson(Koraidon).

[gayelectro]

Earthspark liveblog episode 9/10

Absolutely loving the camera work in this episode so far. The fight choreography and shots are looking fabulous. Very dramatic.

Not sure if the way they depict Skywarp's power is the most seizure friendly...

DAAAAAMN THIS FIGHT WENT HARD.

Overall I'm actually growing to like Megatron's voice (I didn't like it from the previews I'd seen) but sometimes he'll have a slew of dialogue where it's like "literally what is this accent that he's shooting for". People say it's Scottish, but I have never heard somebody with this Scottish accent.

Wilhelm scream

Dot punching Mandroid in the face was awesome.

Dot is the best, every line from her in this episode is just *chef's kiss*

Man, I dunno what it is, but I just cannot muster it in me to give a fuck about this Mandroid plot. So far, this show just works better for me when it's about the Maltos. I know I'm boned, since it looks like he's gonna be the central antagonist, but it's like... I do not care at all.

"I wish to rid this world of all violent beings" well we know the Cybertronian solution to that problem, now don't we?

Not to be that guy on main, but Megatron laughing smugly while tied up in bondage...

Dot is so cool. Like she's kind of everything (and MORE) that I wanted out of June Darby and Agent Fowler.

"YOU GOT THE TOUCH" REFERENCE 🎉🎉🎉

"BACK FROM THE DEAD WITH A MIDLIFE CRISIS ALT-MODE" HEEEEEEELP SHE WENT FOR HIS ASS COMPLETELY UNPROMPTED

Okay, this has been nagging me the entire show... The arachnibots look more like ticks than spiders. They keep insisting they're spiders, but they're shaped exactly like ticks. The extra eyes aren't enough to sell me! Ticks are still arachnids! You can call them arachnibots but admit that they're ticks!

NIGHTSHADE NIGHTSHADE IS HERE OH MY GOD

Tit missiles. Nice.

"I didn't have a word for my name, just a feeling" I like the exploration of that in this show, I know this is gonna be a reoccurring theme.

NIGHTSHAAAAAAADE

I honestly have seen nothing about Hashtag and Jawbreaker but I already love them. All these Terran babies are so precious. I would protect them with my life.

NIGHTSHADE PICKING THE OWL BOBBLEHEAD IS SUCH CUTE FORESHADOWING OMG

Yeah, Nightshade is just filling my heart with such joy. It's the way they made that face as they could tell Optimus was confused on how to refer to them. It's how Mo looked at them with understanding and stood up to say their feelings out loud. It just about made me break out into happy tears when Optimus Prime so readily accepted and then immediately started actively using their proper pronouns in a sentence. God, after all this time, seeing a Cybertronian that's like me just warms my heart.

Okay Tudyk definitely slipped into his Clayface voice for most of his explanation of the plan. I swear, this show would be helped out a lot if actors could have some more takes at lines. He is an amazing and varied voice actor! But I'm not feeling it.

Nice purple rain reference

Love when we get shots of bots safely catching a human while transforming, that's a cool thing we've seemed to get more of as we get more CG animated media.

Dot and Alex are so sweet. I love their marriage. It's easy to see how much they really love each other.

Wow I love that Mandroid definitely 100% died there and we're never going to see him again and there's no way he will come back and--

Oh my GOD Dot is such a good mom.

[ben-talks-art]

Let's talk about entitlement

A couple of weeks ago I discovered that a voice actor from my country, an incredibly popular figure that is known for voicing super big roles such as Superman, Samurai Jack, Optimus Prime, Coop from Megas XLR (my favorite dub from the dude btw, he absolutely kills it!), and also acting as the voice for many popular actors such as Jim Carrey, was cast to play the role of Future Devil in the Brazillian dub of Chainsaw Man.

Now... I myself have not watched anything dubbed in my home country in eons, in fact, the Puss in Boots 2 movie was the first time in a while where I saw any form of media dubbed with Brazillian voice actors, if only because I wanted to see this thing as soon as possible so I just rushed to the nearest cinema I could find, and sadly Brazillian cinema doesn't show animated movies in their original dub...

So anyway, I wasn't exactly going "OMG!! Superman is gonna voice the "the future rules!" guy!!!" or anything like that. I was mostly just going "Oh, neat!", but after watching Puss I was kinda curious to find out how the whole Brazilian Future Devil thing went and... Ugh...

Apparently, the voice actor got a lot of hate on Twitter because they didn't adapt the line from the manga in the same way it was done by the fan translations... I repeat, people got angry at the actor because the line was different from the FAN TRANSLATIONS! And he received so much backlash from the watchers that he decided to drop out of the show and thus won't be returning for a future season.

Cool...

So... Let's talk about entitlement a little bit

Let's just assume for a moment that there is a girl you really, really like (I'm using "girl" but just replace it with whatever works for you), but she couldn't care less about you, so you try to make yourself look better, more desirable, more "worthy" of her by, let's say... Having a very well-paid job, or being someone who donates a lot to charity, or paying for the surgery of her grandma, or finding the cure for cancer, or ending world hunger... Let's just assume you did everything you could to be considered the most perfect person ever...

You're still not entitled to that girl's affection, appreciation, or even attention if she doesn't want to give you that.

Entitlement is the mentality of "I earned this, so I deserved it!"

But the fact of the matter is, unless you're paying someone for a job, and they agree to it, nobody really owes you anything.

(Although I guess one could argue that you're also owed your parents' support in order to survive since they're the reason you're here at all but... I'm not sure I have enough knowledge to talk about this so casually.)

But long story short, entitlement is this idea that you should have things done in the way you want them to be, just because you convinced yourself that this is how it should be.

I mentioned before in my Makima post that I really don't like this mentality because it works to make people think they have power over something they have nothing to do with.

This happens a lot with fanbases. Sonic, Kingdom Hearts, Chainsaw Man, Star wars... There are so many pieces of media where the public will go "this isn't how I wanted" or even worse "this isn't how it is supposed to go!" as if they were the creators or something.

They use arguments like "I complain because I care!" but in reality, it isn't about caring. This isn't about displaying your love for an IP you care about, it's about you not being able to handle a reality different from what you wanted.

It's basically the premise of the movie "Misery" where this one fan wants to act like she knows the story better than the actual author.

Now... Thinking that you deserve something even though there is nothing that says you technically do aside from your own belief is already bad enough, but it gets even worse when people use it as an excuse to act violently.

Harassing a voice actor and making him give up on his job just because a line was changed is just beyond silly. It's not the fans' duty to tell how a story should be told, same way it isn't right for fans to harass an actor just because they played an unpopular character in a live-action performance like it Happened with Rose in Star Wars, or telling someone they should kill themselves just because they made a joke about an infamous ship in Chainsawman.

It's even weirder in Chainsawman's case because part 2 literally starts with someone getting so much harassment by their classmates that it makes her want to die, which just makes me wonder if people are even trying to pick the messages of the story they are consuming.

Bottom line, entitlement is ugly. It is in my opinion THE ugliest mindset anyone could have.

It makes people perform actions out of selfishness, arrogance, anger, and it only works to spread pain and misery. It makes you look at other people as objects that only exist to satisfy your desires and makes you forget they have feelings and that they can get hurt, all because they happen to want to do something you disagree with.

If someone writes a story in a way you don't like it, you're not entitled to attack that writer. If someone performs the role of a character in a way you don't like it, you're not entitled to attack that actor. And if someone has an opinion about a piece of media that you disagree with, you're not entitled to attack that commenter.

You NEVER have a reason to attack anyone. Trying to put others down just to make yourself look big, ironically, doesn't make you look big! It just makes it look like you don't have enough faith in what you stand for and are too afraid that someone might prove you wrong.

Entitlement and aggressiveness are huge symbols of insecurity, cowardice, and immaturity, because people who truly believe in what they believe in, don't resort to harassment so fast just because a different point of view showed up.

We only attack when we feel threatened, when we feel someone is trying to hurt us or trying to take something important from us.

Attacking should only be reserved for self-defense, or the defense of someone who can't defend themselves (and even then I feel like there is a whole other grey area of debate on how to know who needs and should be defended and from whom, which I really don't feel I have the skills or maturity to properly talk about myself).

A random line on a fan translation of a popular manga that got changed when the official dub came out... Is just not a good enough reason to feel threatened, and not a good enough reason to attack someone, even if it's just an online attack.

We all know the line, "If you have nothing good to say, don't say anything!"

Unless someone is asking for your opinion, unless someone is paying you to speak and make a criticism or provide some sort of honest feedback, or unless you're being harassed first, you are NEVER entitled to use your words or body to try to harm someone!

You are free to live your life in any possible way you want, as long as no one is getting hurt from it.

...

At least in my opinion...

I am not a psychologist, or psychiatrist, or a psychic, or any form of expert in the field of the human mind.

These are just my casual thoughts about a... Not so casual topic, but I feel it's important to be talked about nonetheless because I feel not many people seem to realize how big of a problem entitlement really is, and how it seems to be getting worse as the years go by as the media and internet keeps making us feel like we have more power over other people's lives than we actually have.

Just... Try to think twice before you get that sudden urge to want to complain about the way something is or how someone is acting just because you don't agree with it. Think a little about who might be getting hurt from it and if it's truly worth it getting so upset about it.

...

Anyways, this was a downer talk... Anyone seen Puss in Boots 2 yet?

[thanksjro]

Dark Cybertron Chapter 12: That’s the Power of Love, Babeyyyyy

Thank fucking god, it’s almost over.

Our issue opens up with Ironhide deadnaming Slug, like the out-of-touch grandpa that he is. Everything is going to shit, the whole city’s covered in lasers like the world’s worst rave, and someone thought it was a good idea to let Swerve have a gun.

As the Ammonites try to murder everyone in sight, Whirl and Arcee have a little chat about how Whirl’s seemingly caused every problem ever in the last four million years.

…Whirl, you have been keeping up with your appointments with Rung, right? Like, I know he’s not the best therapist around by any stretch of the imagination, but surely something would be better than nothing in this case.

On the Lost Light, Hound, Perceptor, and Mainframe are keeping track of how many Ammonites have been killed. Everyone is extra British in this bit. Perceptor basically calls Hound a fucking idiot, because even with all the guys who’ve been taken out, there are still literally BILLIONS of these suckers running around.

Which seems a little overkill to me, but what do I know? Warcrimes aren’t my specialty.

Meanwhile, in the Mystical City of Making Science Cry, Starscream apparently knows what cosplay is, and takes a potshot at Jhiaxus for stealing his look. Metalhawk explains how the Ammonites got here in the first place, which, y’know, is cool. Love me some technobabble exposition.

I don’t actually love it.

I’m sorry for lying.

I WOULD ALSO LIKE FOR METALHAWK TO PUT A STOP TO THIS

BUT WE’VE GOT ANOTHER 19 PAGES TO GO

SO I GUESS LIFE JUST ISN’T FUCKING FAIR RATTRAP

While Metalhawk contemplates ending the comic event early, Starscream is getting his ass kicked by an old man who spent the war sitting on his butt in the Dead Universe.

Over with Team -Imus, Brainstorm’s taking a breather after getting Robertsed at the end of last issue. Ultra Magnus makes a pun, I guess to cope with the fact that he doesn’t understand anything that’s going on. Cyclonus is still dying, but this isn’t about him. Nightbeat is also dying. Oh, and Kup. Turns out, being a part of the Dead Universe is sort of an issue when you’re out of it.

Even though Galvatron was fine. And Jhiaxus. And Nova Prime, for the little bit he was out of it.

I feel like this plot point kinda just shows up when it’s convenient.

Anyway.

Brainstorm has shit in his lab that can help them not die, but he and Skids are gonna need help to get all these undead morons back to the Lost Light, which means that only two folks would be going to face Shockwave in this final confrontation.

Speaking of Shockwave, he’s gone full Burning Justice with that time drive shoved into his chest, as he makes fun of Megatron for being a dumb stupid idiot who gave him everything he needed to end the universe. He reveals himself to be a nihilist, claiming that a Cybertron which only exists for existence’s sake- and without any form of life- is the ultimate in perfection. Also, he’s a communist now. A nihilistic communist.

Just… whatever, Shockwave.

Megatron’s annoyed by all this posturing- which, same- but enough about him, it’s time for Ultra Magnus and Optimus Prime drop down from… somewhere… to kick some ass. Shockwave promptly shoots Magnus, and is about to do the same to Optimus, when this starts happening:

Huh. Wonder what all that’s about.

Shockwave snaps out of his stupor and proceeds to fire on Optimus, yelling about being the only thing that exists as he does.

Over with Rodimus and friends, Cyclonus is bitching about Rodimus not leaving him behind so he could go fight Shockwave. Nightbeat, who I guess just doesn’t know when to keep his mouth shut, tells Cyclonus to quit it, because they all know that he just misses his boyfriend. Cyclonus, though blatantly annoyed, doesn’t actually refute this claim. Brainstorm wonders aloud just how this gaggle of assholes managed to escape the Dead Universe without murdering each other.

Rodimus explains that when they heard the singing at Swerve’s, it proved they could still get out of the Dead Universe, so they desecrated Nova Prime’s corpse to make a space bridge. Brainstorm became a doorway, because he’s very nearly dead, and oh yeah, he should probably fix that when they get back to the lab, and also reconsider his lab safety protocols.

The gang reaches the outside world, and Rodimus is given a chance to spout off his personal philosophies.

Fantastic, you funky little man.

Then everyone looks up in the sky and sees some real bullshit.

Hey, Cahill? I just wanna talk, man. Just wanna talk about this boobie Windblade you’ve cursed my eyes with.

Back over with Jhiaxus and Starscream, Jhiaxus just cannot shut up. He just keeps waxing poetic about how smart Shockwave’s plan is. I couldn’t even tell you what the guy’s saying- my eyes glaze over whenever he gets a speech bubble.

Metalhawk at this point has had quite enough of all this nonsense, and decides he’s gonna throw himself into the equation that allows the Dark Cybertron prophecy to manifest.

By killing himself.

He just fuckin’… tosses himself into some heavy machinery and explodes, and that throws all the ores out of wack, since he’s got the Resurrection Ore in him. Jhiaxus is distracted by a man just straight-up dying in the same room as him, and this give Starscream the opening he needs to stab Jhiaxus in the gut.

Then the background just straight up disappears, as Rattrap lets everyone know that it’s all still going to shit, but in the opposite direction.

Really not sure about this art direction, but whatever. I’m over it.

Back outside, all the Ammonites are exploding. All of them. Billions of the little suckers, just popping off like fire crackers. The environment’s going to be ruined at this rate. Metroplex is having a great fucking time. Happy for him.

The Lost Light calls the ladies inside Metroplex’s brain room, and lets them know that they’re gonna break up Monstructor like the mediocre boy-band he is, though not without Mainframe being difficult beforehand. The ladies jump out and enter the fray, admiring Arcee’s style as they do.

Back with Rodimus and pals, Nightbeat’s being fucking cryptic, and Brainstorm gets to work making it so folks aren’t dying from being in the wrong universe, after a little prodding to his ego.

Back in Shockwave’s Super Saiyan Energy Bubble of Pure Unadulterated Logic, Shockwave says that’s he’s fucking ripped, and Optimus couldn’t beat him in a fight. Clearly, this means we’ll have to use our words to resolve this, like adults. Optimus isn’t too sure about that option, however.

I mean, do I even have to- Optimus, that’s GAY.

I have the sneaking suspicion that Roberts wrote this portion of the script. Y’know, just given his track record.

Then Megatron blasts Shockwave with his fusion cannon, and makes fun of Optimus for being a sentimental fool.

The fact that “Dark Cybertron” is telling me this makes me so mad. Like, you don’t get to talk, Exposition Central.

It’s at this point that Megatron drops a bomb on everyone present- he’s done with being a Decepticon. He’s gonna be an Autobot now.

See, ol’ Megsy here has seen the error of his ways- that by fighting the Senate, he allowed them to change him into a murderous warlord. To prove how much of a nice guy he is, he’s ripped the Autobrand off of Bumblebee’s lifeless body and duct-taped it to his chest.

Which seems a tad disrespectful, but okay.

…Megatron, you do realize that, as the leader of the Decepticons, you could just tell everyone that they need to be nice, and that would more or less be the end of it, right? You could just say “not evil anymore, I want to be loved now”, and everyone would be all “sir yes sir.” This is going to be a PR nightmare, I can already tell. Shockwave certainly seems to agree with me.

I really like this panel structure. Want to say this is the only place it happens, too. It’s just too bad it lives in “Dark Cybertron”.

Shockwave’s not having a good time right now, and he’s convinced that Optimus and Megatron have teamed up just to make him upset so he loses control of the time drive. The two spout off a little Autobot propaganda, and then Shockwave Remembers™.

Shockwave, having had his shadowplay reverse violently and abruptly, is horrified to find what he’s become. Alas, it’s too late for him- the only way to stop the time drive is for Optimus to kill him. Optimus promises to remember who Shockwave was- a callback to the line Shockwave gave him back before his empurata- and then shoots the everloving fuck out of the guy. Megatron helps.

And that’s a series wrap on Shoc-

-holy fucking shit.

The gang high-tails it outta there, IDW Optimus once again proving to be the shittiest version of everyone’s space-dad, as he leaves Bumblebee’s body to be consumed by the Shockwave Singularity. It’s looking pretty hopeless, but luckily none of these bastards can die without fucking up Season 2 of MTMTE, so the Lost Light swoops in to save the day.

Down below, Soundwave and his gaggle of small children and animals watch as the Lost Light fucks off into the distance. Soundwave’s having a time and a half, as he realizes with his balls-to-the-wall senses that Megatron’s joined the Autobots. Galvatron shows up to try to work out a deal. We won’t be seeing where this goes, because that’ll be covered later on.

The Lost Light lands in front of Metroplex, and over to the left of that are Rattrap and Starscream, climbing over the wreckage of the city. Rattrap tries to warn Starscream that things are gonna be tough, now that the Dark Cybertron prophecy has come to pass, but Starscream isn’t really having it. He’s gotten very paranoid, likely due to stress, and tells Rattrap to not play this game, because he’s the best player who’s ever lived. Then the Lost Light gang shows up and we get this face:

Sure.

Later on, Megatron and Optimus are hanging out in the Sky Roller, not-talking, until Megatron tells Optimus to get on with it, since the issue’s about to end. Megatron was totally serious about becoming an Autobot. Optimus isn’t really sure what to do with that. I don’t think anyone’s really sure what to do with that, to be honest.

Megatron, in turn, asks Optimus if he really could look past all the bullshit Shockwave pulled in the last several million years, and he gets a non-answer, because addressing your feelings is for losers, clearly. The two exit the ship, and I guess everyone else was just… standing outside waiting for them to talk it out. Weird.

...And with THAT, I am finally released from Comic Event Hell!

If you hear any distant, triumphant screeching right now, that’s likely me.

[blueprimegirl]

Drive me up Truck

Optimus Prime x Human!Reader

You were hanging out with Jack and Miko at a local restaurant, eating lunch and doing homework; well the two were doing homework since you were a legal adult and today it was a day off.

Been a mechanic was tiering for a female and your male coworkers always gave you a hard time to put it simply.

"[Name], you are so lucky you are done with school! I hate homework." Miko was complaing, playing with her pencil on the tip of her nose, trying to balance it.

"You say that now, but just wait when you got to work a full-time job." you explained, sipping on your soda. Jack could only groan and nod in approval; he knew what it was like to work and put up with the lousy boss and ungrateful customers.

Your gaze averted from the two, out the window seeing seeing a group of men talking and joking, their trucks resting outside. You looked over the big cars, their different colors and paintjobs shining in the Nevada sunlight; the chroming details so beautiful.

"Ohh [Name]...checking out some men you like?" Miko teased, making you roll your eyes and chuckle.

"Pfff...no way. They are way older than me. I was looking at their trucks." you said, making Jack look up at you with a raised eyebrow, Miko only smirked, urging you on to continue.

"I always had a weakness for these enormous machines; they're big, powerful and stream masculinity. I would do anything to drive one of this hot monsters." you explained, biting your lip as you looked over the golden rims of one of the trucks.

"Ohh so you love trucks!" Miko exclaimed and you laughed, nodding.

It was true, you had a weakness for this type of vehicle; they were the bigger on the road, powerful and mighty; and the fact that driving one meant visiting all over the world was so exciting.

"Sooo in conclusion you would do anything to get on Optimus gearshift?" Miko teased, making you choke on your soda. Jack only looked shocked at the Japanese girls' worlds.

"T-That's not what I meant!" you said with a deep blush on your face.

Well, it was true that maybe you had a weak spot for the leader of the Autobots, but how could you not? He was brave, intelligent, strong and loyal; a true hero. Not to mention his alt-mood.

Now that you think about it, you always felt a kind of heat when he was in the same room as you or when he was rolling down in his truck-self; these sweet rims and shiny pipes streaming hot smoke.

You weren't one to ogle on men looks, but Optimus; he had that masculine sex-appeal and his pain-job? You could only dream to touch it with your fingertips.

"Tell yourself that [Name]...but your blush is as red as Optimus paint job." Miko teased and giggled. You only glared at her, looking outside.

~TimeSkip~

It was Monday, you were in the Autobots base with Miko and Raf, plus Bumblebee, Bulkhead and Ratchet. Arcee was with Jack outside on the Nevada road and from what you heard Optimus was patrolling.

"I beat you again, Bumblebee!" Raf exclaimed as he beat the yellow mech at a racing video-game.

"When I will be of legal age I'm gonna drive like this!" Miko exclaimed sitting next to Raf.

"Hey [Name]! You are an adult so what it's like to be able to drive?" Raf asked, making you sigh.

"I wish I could, but I don't have a car." you said sadly, crossing your arms over your shoulders.

"Pfff [Name] here is more into trucks than normal cars!" Miko said teasingly, making you blush a light pink. You hoped she wasn't going to push it more; you didn't need the Autobots to find out about your secret.

"Trucks? Like Optimus alt-mood, right?" Raf said, looking over at you.

"Ohh yeah! [Name] said something about trucks streaming pure hot masculinty, right?" Miko smirked your way; Raf and Bumblebee were laughing.

Bulkhead smirked your way, making you blush deeper.

"N-Not like that!" you exclaimed, trying to find your words.

"Ohhh and I think I also heard something like she would die to drive one of this hot monsters, trying on the gearshift." Miko continued, making Bulkhead laugh along with Bumblebee.

Ratchet looked over at the group, rolling his optics and muttering something 'Kids.'

Before you could say anything else the door to the base opened and none other than the blue and red painted leader entered; talk about poor timing.

He greeted everyone and wondered why Bumblebee was trying not to laugh, not to mention Bulkhead and Mikos grinning faces. You were just trying to hide your blushing face, hopefully these two won't say something stupid.

"Hey there, hot monster truck." Bulkhead teased making Miko laugh and you to look down at your feet.

Optimus looked at the scene with a confused face, not getting what the military green mech meant.

"Don't look at us like that. Is not our words." Miko said with a miscevious glint in her eyes. Optimus looked over at the younger human and his yellow guardian who only shrugged, giggling. Taking a glance at Ratchet who only sighed, rolling his optics.

"[Name] here as Miko puts it, has a hot spot for big powerful trucks....something about them streaming masculinty." Ratchnet explained with a gruff voice.

Optimus looked at you with a raised optic, his shiny blue orbs making you blush so much more. He was so intimidating and so sweet at the same time, it made you feel so nervous.

"Is it true, [Name]?" his baritone voice said, taking a slow step towards you. Your eyes looked up at him and decided that it was no use in lying to the blue and red mech; you couldn't lie to him.

"W-Well, yes...I always wished to drive one." you confessed, rubbing your hands in nervousness. Then you heard the sound of shifting metals and you saw Optimus alt-mood in all his glory, the door to the drivers place opened in an inviting manner.

Looking over at the others, Raf and Bumblebee gave you a thumbs up, then you steped to the big shiny truck, jumping in the drivers leather seat.

"That's it, [Name]! Go get some!" Miko exclaimed while Bulkhead whistled, making you blush and lean your forehead against the steering-wheel.

"Buckle up, [Name]...We are going for a ride." Optimus deep voice pulled you out of your thinking, straping the safety-belt on, then  his engine purred to life, wheels streching on the floor as you took off outside.

To be continued?...

[bot-imagines]

Do you think you could do the prompt about an S/O who's a diamond from Steven Universe just with all the tfp autobots?

TFP Autobots Discovering Their S/O Is A Diamond

(A/N: I’m going to assume the rest of the team finds out as well)

Optimus Prime

Optimus is cautious but willing to listen. He’s had occasional run-ins with Gems, and has had a few tense interactions with the other Diamonds. He’s never spoken to White and he really doesn’t want to. He’ll try to have an open mind, but the memories of how the Diamond Authority treats their subjects is always in the back of his mind.

The more he talks to his S/O, the less he can see them as a tyrannical ruler. As his S/O explains exactly why they left and went into hiding, his worries (mind the pun) shatter away. 

He can sympathize with wanting to break free from who you were in the past. He’ll do his best to help his S/O move on and find happiness in their new life.

Ratchet

Ratchet is definitely far more skeptical and absolutely furious. He’s seen what the Diamond Authority does to the planets they colonize. More than one cyberformed world has been drained of its resources thanks to them - a handful of wish could have been possible sanctuaries for Cybertronians.

He’s rather short with his S/O, and it takes some coaxing to get him to listen to their explanation. At first, as they explain what they went through, he only scoffs and rolls his eyes. But when they start to get to the really hard parts, including the reason they faked their own shattering and went into hiding, he becomes more sympathetic.

He’ll start having more talks with his S/O about gemkind and other races. There’s so much more to talk about now that he knows they’re not from Earth.

Bumblebee

Bee has only heard of the Diamonds. He’s never actually seen one, much less interacted with one. He’s seen the records of their colonies though. He’s seen gems shattered before and knows that the Diamonds do that. He looks at his S/O and wonders how many of their own subjects they’ve shattered.

He wants to understand why his S/O gave up their position, because they have to have a reason. Right? He pays attention through the entire explanation, and at some point, he starts holding their hand. His spark hurts to know that his beloved S/O went through something like that, but he wants to do everything he can to make their life now much better.

He definitely wants to see them using their powers. Shape-shifting is a favorite of his. He also really likes the fact that when his S/O is in their true Diamond form, he can hug them without fear of crushing them. He even starts working with his S/O to get them to shape-shift into a functioning car so they can go for a drive together.

Arcee

She’s not completely convinced that they’re not like the rest of the Diamonds. She’s born witness to the Diamond Authority’s devastation, and she will die before she lets the same fate befall Earth. Her S/O thought that with everything they’d shared, Arcee would be more trusting, but no. She’s second-guessing everything they’ve shared together, wondering if it was all a ruse.

It hurts, but S/O does their best to explain everything. Arcee, to her credit, does listen. But still, she has a hard time trusting them. And honestly, she’s more than a little hurt that they kept this from her. She thought they were close.

It takes time, but after some more talking and some time to think, Arcee comes around. She doesn’t pry about her S/O’s past, partially because she knows how much it hurts them, but also because she isn’t sure she really wants to know.

Bulkhead

He’s actually... pretty angry. Yeah, that’s a side of Bulk his S/O hasn’t ever seen before, but now they’re sure as hell gonna. He’s had to go toe-to-toe with more than one gem, and now he’s finding out that one of the gem leaders has been here, masquerading as his S/O this entire time? He’s pissed. He feels really stupid, like his S/O was laughing behind his back while he was freaking falling in love with them. His S/O is tripping over themself trying to reassure bulkhead that ‘no, no, absolutely not!’ but it doesn’t really do much. Not when they’re staring at him with literal diamonds in their eyes. 

He needs time to cool off before he’s willing to hear his S/O out. He’ll probably have to go out for a drive and break something. This entire thing is a huge blow to his pride, in all honesty. But once he works it out of his system, he comes back to the base, solemn and ready to listen. After his S/O finishes explaining, he quietly asks if what they had was real. He’s more than relieved to find that yes, it was.

He kind of tiptoes around the subject after that, only talking about it when his S/O brings it up, which isn’t often. He’s definitely impressed with their powers though. He gets a thing for challenging them to arm wrestling matches.

Smokescreen

He’s got his weapons activated the moment his S/O reveals their true form. At first, he’s certain it’s a Decepticon trick, but once he realizes it’s not, he starts shouting out accusations and questions. Much like Bee, Smokescreen hasn’t actually seen a Diamond. Unlike Bee, he’s also never seen firsthand the devastation of gem colonization. He’s really only ever seen images and read reports. It makes his S/O seem out to be this alien boogeyman. 

He would never have gotten together with them if he’d known they were secretly a tyrant, and he tells them as much when they try to explain. It actually really hurts his S/O’s feelings, and the others have to step in and separate them for a bit to get them both cool down. Once they do, Smokescreen kind of slinks back and apologizes for his words, and he agrees to hear them out.

He doesn’t understand a lot about gems, but his S/O does their best to teach him. He definitely comes around when he learns about some of the battles his S/O has been a part of. He’s completely onboard when he sees them use their powers. His S/O is so cool!

Wheeljack

At first, he isn’t sure what to think. He doesn’t exactly have the best track record when it comes to authority figures, so finding out his S/O is actually one of the Diamonds? Yeah, there’s a rift there. Same as Bulkhead, he’s had to deal with gems on more than one occasion when he was with the Wreckers, and once or twice after he struck out on his own. He wants to believe his S/O wouldn’t do something so horrible, but he’s just... he’s not sure.

He hears them out, but after they finish, he just looks at them and drives off. he needs to think. It might be a few hours or a few days before he comes back. He spends a lot of time thinking back on all the times he’s had to tussle with gems and seen kindergartens and what they do to a planet. After he comes back, he’ll take his S/O and have a long, serious talk with them. It’s not like him to do so, but this isn’t the sort of thing he can afford to slack off about. When it’s all said and done, he’s accepting of the choices his S/O has made.

He actually starts to brag about his S/O after a while. He’ll keep it to just the few people who know, but he still loves to talk about how strong his S/O is. he’s also overjoyed that he’s got a new lobbing partner.

Ultra Magnus

He’s completely convinced that his S/O was simply trying to infiltrate the Autobot command for information. He asks Optimus for orders. He doesn’t want to take his S/O into custody, but if Prime tells him to, he will, albeit reluctantly. The Diamond Authority has been a concern of his for a while now. He was reluctant enough when he learns his S/O was a gem, and the implications of their presence on Earth, but after he learns they’re a Diamond? He’s borderline paranoid.

He only listens to his S/O if they explain to everyone why they chose this form. He keeps a very stoic expression the entire time, After they get thorough the explanation, he’s going to try to keep thing professional as he fills out paperwork and tries to ask follow-up questions. His S/O has to get them alone before he’ll dare show his own feelings on the matter. He’s confused, and worried for his team, and just a tad upset that his S/O kept this from him. But he can’t argue with the logic of their situation.

Ultra Magnus actually starts talking to his S/O about gem/Cybertronian political relations. He’s knows that his S/O doesn’t have any real say in this sort of thing, but he values their input. He’s hoping that with their help, he can find a way to secure an alliance with the Diamonds His S/O doesn’t have the heart to tell him it’s never gonna happen

[schiste-argileux]

Idw Prowl is an evil SOB (took him two years to send the Wreckers to Garrus-9 and help Maxy (who was protecting all the war crimes the Bots did), put Maxy’s torturer and a war criminal on board the Lost Light cuz why not, sent Pharma to Delphi knowing it was DJD territory)

Prowl... Prowl’s creation and competence in his area of work is astounding. He is brilliant, creative, and defiantly apathetic of this world. But, he is very human in his own way. IDW Prowl is selfish, yet not. He is a unique in that aspect because most people make decisions like his for the sole reason of benefiting themselves. But Prowl’s sole reason of existing is to create PEACE. 

Peace. Peace can only be done when people are complacent, happy, and satisfied. When things are stationary. Stable. 

But life is never stable. Elements desire to form bonds, yet are almost always leaning towards to instability... Prowl’s form of PEACE is a world where there is no fighting. But everything sentient requires to fulfill its desires. As long as there is desire, people will fight. 

A world of PEACE would be a world of full control, there are no surprises, no change. Safety, routines, and constants. No creativity, no development... nothing. stagnant. 

But I must admire Prowl’s tenacity and dedication to this world! 

He sacrifices everything for the sake of the directive, preserve cybertron, PEACE. He sacrifices his morals (Robot Gets Bullied By a Human), his dignity (Recent News, Cop Accepts Orgy For The Means of Establishing Peace, his body (Recent News, Cop gets Molested by A Spider for The Autobot Cause), and of course, thousands of lives (Not Recent News). :D Prowl respects and understands that there will always be chaos and instability, and he is so very flexible around it all! He literally can maximize everything and anything he has. He is the embodiment of consequentialism with a lil dash of politics. I wish my group project members were 1% as productive as him! Prowl tries to put everything black and white, and he gets upset when things get far more tricky, and wants to get everything in control so people can stay safe and remain in peace and not fight! And that’s a respectable goal! Control can be good, it means one understands and is able to retain themselves and the thing they are controlling. But Prowl doesn’t want to accept that there are things out of his control. And Prowl likes to think he’s justified when he controls the uncontrollable. 

I mean, yeah, if he didn’t do what he did, the autobots would have been six feet under A LOT EARLIER. Optimus is not a good leader, preserving organic life over his own soldiers? Psh. Look at Spike, he’s got valid points and can I understand why he left the ‘bots. Prowl’s probably thinking everyday, DAMN, OP, WHY R U SO DUMB. LISTEN WE NEED TO FEED OUR SOLDIERS AND PRIORITIZE OUR SPECIES LIVES INSTEAD OF THIS FUCKING CARBON BASED CIRCLE. HELLO??? And literally Prowl could have been like I’m gonna get ya assassinated so I CAN HAVE IT MY WAY. But Prowl was BORN for the RULES. To follow, to MAKE PEACE. Killing the prime figurehead is against that, even if it would make his life way easier! (hence, not that selfish and also sad that your life is the rules. That’s a short leash, but he makes due)

Honestly I feel bad for Prowl. Must suck to be so big brain that everyone hates you when you say the truths (but also you could learn some more tricks from Jazz to be nicer and hide the truth, but that’s scary because a nicer prowl means more people he can trick and use. Thanks Prowl for being so straightforward! Now people can avoid you easier). He's so straightforward about things that need to be done, he’s in constant denial about the grey area of life!

That’s why when Spike slapped Prowl with reality slaps, Prowl lost some of his shit. Remember, nearly everyone had the edgy depressed time in their teens or young adult years where you realize the world is truly unfair and nothing is black and white? Yeah. Slap that on a 6+ million year old robot with a battle computer and is capable of big brain CPU-age, and was literally built for the sole purpose of enforcing rules and making peace? And no one really cared about Prowl enough to understand him and his background. So Prowl goes through his angst moment alone with his huge titties, frustrated. THIS. IS. WHY. YOU. COMMUNICATE. YA DINGUS. 

Prowl doesn’t become a school shooter like Pharma cuz hes got bigger brain and a lot more power and control over himself, but he literally becomes Shadow The Hedgehog (Even if the world’s against me I’ll fight like I’ve always have). HE’S GONE ROGUE. MA’AM, SIR, THE FUCKING OREO COOKIE HAS TRANSFORMED AND ROLLED OUT.  like. OP was the one thing holding prowl back, which was good! But now prowl’s on the roll and bumblebee is too nice and passive to hold him back. + the bombshell brainwash? feels so bad. being prowl sucks. because Prowl is a necessary evil. 

At least he’s wonderfully blunt about his goal to create a peaceful cybertron, which makes it easier if you want to avoid him or smth. meanwhile you have fake people IRL that smile their way through and then slit your throat and you won’t even know it was them (hey jazz, no offense, but that’s what spec ops does). Fakers are the scariest enemy, but Prowl is still a threat, just not as big as a someone who fluffs you up on a balloon and then pops it. Prowl would just be like, hey, you’re really useful, come over here in my white van i wanna show you something and then maybe you get destroyed. But hey! You were the one with the highest chance of surviving compared to other people! Isn’t that great? You’re so skilled WOW. (Prowl gets punched. Again!) Prowl represents the necessary evil in society. We WILL ALWAYS HAVE EVIL people in this world. But Prowl is a far better evil than people who do evil for their own selfish reasons. It’s like how we have law enforcers and politicians . It’s basically giving them legal rights to do illegal things (lmao). BUT we need them regardless. We need those people to get their hands dirty, possibly killed, so that people can live in innocence and peace. 

I don’t think Prowl ever realized that he was a necessary evil, and when Spike showed him that, he was bitter. But he accepted it. Which I respect because most people can’t be bothered to understand themselves and just throw themselves in denial, and point fingers for their flaws. Prowl sucks up and understands who he is, and he makes the best of it to achieve his goal.  I mean, honestly? Prowl is probably a miracle worker. Not in a Ratchet sense. But look at the way modern governments run, nothing gets done, everything is stalled because no one has the guts to make sacrifices. Prowl would have gotten a shit ton of things done, man, and take quick efficient action. Even if he sacrifices many things for it.  (Warning. I do not condone any taking of lives, NO ONE has the right to judge whenever a person should live or die.)  Prowl reminds me of 秦始皇 (Qin Shi Huang), the king who unified China and sacrificed millions to make the Great Wall, canals, and road systems that last to this day. If it wasn’t for these accomplishments, China wouldn’t have been what it is today. Was it a good thing? For the future residents of China? Hell yeah. But the costs? Those are sins that can never be erased, and they are horrible and shouldn't be done ever again. Was it necessary? Perhaps. But that’s another discussion. Is Prowl evil? Depends on your definition of evil. Perhaps he’s justified, perhaps in his world, he’ll go down as the Qin Shi Huang of the Cybertronians. Regardless, Prowl like Pharma, is an EXCELLENT example to study on public ethics, and administrative officials should analyze him and learn from his mistakes and sins.  I think Prowl is not evil in a sense that he wishes to harm others, but evil in a sense of his apathy. Prowl is a necessary component to a functional society (someone to plot, to use people, to enforce rules even if some are sacrificed, someone who can get their hands dirty). He lives a terrible and sad fate, and I do not wish ANYONE to live a life like Prowl’s or look up to Prowl. Yes, he’s so clever and brilliant, but that kind of power will make you the loneliest person on Earth.

Thanks Prowl for taking the entire load of sin on your shoulders! Big MVP! You get nothing from the world except hate and contempt.  I would go on about him more but I have IRL stuff to do. I love Prowl as an example to tell people that MODERATION. COMMUNICATION. AND COMPASSION are important factors to have a healthy and good mental state. Prowl is the perfect example of someone who doesn’t want to empathize (haha so many people are like this today), who doesn’t want to try to use more braincells and friends help to make better plans that are more moderate and not extreme, and who doesn’t want to talk to anyone thinking its a waste of time or have difficulty explaining things.  BUT I LOVE G1 PROWL because he has far more patience and manners, and doesn’t take a darker, route for his goals. awhohdohd he’s baby,,, i wish all cops had patience and manners and in general open-minded yet cautious enough not to be taken advantage of,,,, perhaps then we wouldn’t have so much polarization and fighting with authority in this world.... 

uwuwwuwuwuw they did prowl so dirty in idw WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ;____;   Again, you are welcome to disagree or agree! I wrote this really quickly so I’m sure there will be points that could be clarified or edited. Prowl’s really complicated and I do not like to talk about current IRL problems, but Prowl represents a lot of problems in society. And I think it’s critical if we try to look at both perspectives to get an understanding on WHY people do these things, and is there a solution to AVOID making those same mistakes? There’s a couple of controversial things in this short essay I wrote, esp. about cops IRL. So feel free to have at it! Or ignore it! Whichever is more comfortable for you! Thanks for coming to my ted talk! Again, Prowl is a bad influence and a sorrowful life to live. please do not try to be like prowl. xD I won’t intrude on you if you do, because you have a right to live the life you want as long as you’re not hurting other people’s interests and wellbeing! 

[pastelpaperplanes]

Calling in a Favour - Part 2 - Cops and Mob AU

On a bit of writing/drawing high with this one!

----

They were at the docks.

They were at the docks.

The Docks.

Optimus barely held in a quail of fear as the servo on his jacketed shoulder kept him walking deeper into the place bots went to and never came back from.

Something had gone wrong and Megatron was personally going to get rid of him at the docks.

His ‘Boss’ had barely spared him a glance in the last six cycles, and Optimus had realised he was very likely rumbled, but he’d kept coming back, keeping up appearances with the hope he’d be able to get something, anything back to Sentinel before he was snuffed for good.

It looked to him that he’d failed... 

He should have run, left Iacon, gone into hiding, slag he should have told Magnus what had been happening! But a false sense of security as Megatron’s favourite lap warmer had muddled his senses and kept him coming back. 

Despite Shockwave's threats on his life, he’d falsely believed he was safe.

He’d known he was doomed when his door bell had rung late in the evening, just as he was getting up, and had found Megatron looming in his doorway.

The mech had flatly told him to get dressed, and told him, with no shimmer of emotion, that they were going to the docks.

Optimus hadn’t even had time to hide a note somewhere.

He’d been grabbed by the shoulder and led out to Megatron’s transport… and now here he was, being led by Megatron as Lugnut and Shockwave flanked them.

He knew that if he had a mouth, Shockwave would have had the smuggest look on his faceplates. 

All the stolen smug glances alone were enough to make his plating crawl.

He glanced to the briefcase Megatron was holding in his other gloved servo, and could only hope whatever gun was hidden inside would be very quick and painless for him.

He was so focused on the fact he was about to become a body floating in the docs for the Elite Guard to find in the morning, he completely missed the massive starship they were walking towards, or the fact there was a femme waiting for them at the bottom of the lowered gang plank that seemed to lead into the gargatuan white, pink and purple ships loading bay. 

It wasn’t until he was jerked to a stop by Megatron that he looked up, and took in the fact that the ship he was currently standing in front of was one he’d seen on the news broadcast a number of times. One that dwarfed every skyscraper in Iacon by a magnitude of at least six. 

Primus the six main guns, each high power railguns were known to be able to punch a hole a building wide through a moon!

A number of voices of news broadcasters ran through his helm.

‘The Polaris breaks the record for fastest ever circumnavigation of the Cybertronian empire.’

‘The Polaris, the most luxurious and advanced ship to take to see the stars.’

‘The Polaris, how to get tickets and top tips of the hottest spots on the Solderforge Flagship’. 

‘The Polaris wins another battle on the edge, truly it earns it’s title of ‘Fleet killer’ once more.’

He was standing in front of the ‘The Polaris’.

The petite lithe and gorgeous femme stepped up to the four of them, her helm all smooth lines ending in finite points Optimus had the feeling he’d cut himself on just touching. Her colours were soft blues that made her much brighter crystalline blue optics really stand out as they widened with her smile.

“Mega darling! You actually came in bot!” The femme exclaimed gleefully, her voice softer that silk and smoother than honey, Optimus envied her, it sounded so natural. 

Wait… he knew this femme.

Nebularsburst, one of the two captains of the Polaris…

She knew Megatron enough to not be killed for that nickname?!

Megatron huffed, and outright smiled at the femme, passing his brief case to Lugnut long enough to accept the hand she was holding out, and easily swept her off her pedes into a one armed hug.

Both their helms leaned back, and then in an action that had Optimus’ jaw on the floor… they smashed their helms together, causing a very loud metal on metal clang quickly overplayed by the gleeful laughter from Nebularburst as she was set down and she rearranged the thick fur coat she was wrapped up in, it was dyed a similar to one of the blues of her helm plating. “Hem, alright, now we’ve got the old greeting out of the way…” She turned her attention to him and gave him a sugary sweet smile. “Orion Pax I presume? My such a pretty face, it’s no wonder Mega here hasn’t shut up about you!”

“Neb!” Megatron exclaimed, was… was that embarrassment?!

She just laughed and waved off the gunmetal grey mech. “Oh hush I wasn’t talking to you!”

She went right back to looking him over, and before he knew it she was cupping his jaw and pulling him down to optic level with him.

“Hmmm, you are right Mega, he is a very pretty mech…” She frowned then, optics narrowing as she locked optics with his.

The scowl worsenned and Optimus couldn’t hold in his distress anymore, and let off a tiny keen.

Nebularburst’s lower jaw dropped a little bit, she let his jaw go, spun around, and in a motion that left everyone not herself or Megatron flinching back… kneed Megatron so hard between the legs his pedes were off the ground for a brief moment.

Not that he stayed on his pedes much longer, falling to his knees and clutching the assaulted area with a groan of pain.

Lugnut’s jaw dropped, but for some reason beyond Optimus’ stalling processors understanding, didn’t proceed to try and beat the petite femme into a bloody pulp.

No he and Shockwave just both took a step back, and left their boss to the mercy of this femme who barely reached the underside of his chassis. 

“YOU IMBECILE! THE POOR THING THINKS WE’RE GOING TO KILL HIM!”

Oh apparently this tiny femme had a vocal capacity to rival a war cry from Strika. 

Wait… they weren’t going to kill him?!

“Wait?! We’re not?” Shockwave exclaimed, optic wide as he looked between Optimus, Nebularburst and the downed Megatron.

The latter snarled as he got back up. “No, we are not Shockwave. We are here because you have made my nightclub an unsafe work environment for Orion’s life. And as a result, you have forced my servo.” He declared this while keeping a servo over the damaged area in a vain hope his men wouldn’t watch him get sent to his knees twice in one night by a femme not even remotely close to weight class. 

He turned his attention back to where Optimus had at somepoint, lost his ability to stand and fell to his aft, Neb was still standing next to the younger mech, tapping her foot as she had her arms crossed and she scowled at Megatron and Shockwave alike.

“If I had told Orion my plan, there was the chance Shockwave would hear me and make an attempt on Orion’s life.” 

Optimus keened from the floor, shuffling back a little bit to hide behind Nebular’s hanging fur coat, the femme was obviously a force to be reckoned with, and behind her seemed to be the safest spot at the moment.

Nebularburst uncrossed her arms. “Fine… then why did you bring him?”

He chuckled. “I wouldn’t be lying if I say I’d hoped you’d kick him instead of me.”

Shockwave took another step back as Nebularburst turned her attention to him, then glanced over her fur coat covered shoulders at Optimus, and he swore there was just the littlest glint of mischief sparkling there.

“Kick him? No, no, I’m not going to kick him, I’m going to have my staff tie him spread eagle to the front of Pols’ bow, and we’re gonna give him the full experience of leaving Cybertrons atmosphere!” 

Megatron raised a servo. “No, I’m fairly sure that would slag him, and I explained the dilemma of the situation includes me wanting to have him still be around and useful, but at the same time, not pose a threat to Orion here… which is why I’m giving you this.” He gestured to Lugnut, who stepped forward rather tentatively towards Nebularburst, which would of been hillarious if it wasn’t so unnerving to see.

What kind of femme was this world famous captain who apparently knew Megatron well enough to smash their helms together and threaten the abilities of the mechs spike, and not get slagged for it?!

Nebular accepted the offered briefcase, popped it open, and pulled out the data pad that had been stashed inside.

She booted it up, scrolled down the contents, smiled, and scrawled her signature on the dotted line before sliding the data pad into the pocket of her fur coat, which she re-adjusted to have cover both shoulders now, one side had slipped down to reveal the midnight blue star dotted dress she was wearing underneath.

She passed the now empty briefcase to Lugnut, and returned to stand before Megatron, hopping up to press a quick kiss to the mob boss’s cheek. “Take care of yourself Mega, remember, keel hauling has been used as a method of ridding oneself of mutineers for eons now~.” She purred the last part while side eyeing Shockwave, who had the self awareness to bow his helm to her and avert his optic. 

Megatron chuckled, gave her helm and affectionate pat, gave a quick, kurt nod to Optimus, who was still on the floor near the loading ramp, before he turned, and started walking back to where they’d parked the car, humming to himself as Lugnut and Shockwave flanked him, the later noticeably having had the wind taken out of his sails.

Optimus watched them go, confused for a few moments, when a fur covered crooked arm was offered to him, which he cautiously took as Nebularburst helped him up to his pedes. 

“C’mon dear, you look like you need a nap.”

He did, he really honestly did, his processor was over taxed from just how much stress it had been trying to work through, to say nothing of how erratically his spark was pulsing in it’s chamber. 

She patted his arm with her other servo, and began leading him up the loading ramp.

“I know that was… a bit much for someone so out of the loop as you, but don’t worry, you’re in good servos now.” She banged her right pede twice on the metal of the ramp, and the groan of hydraulics coming to life quickly sounded, she then seemed to activate her com-link, and suddenly her voice was booming from the surrounding speakers. “This is you’re Co-Captain Nebularburst speaking, thank you for your patience but we are now able to depart, so let’s get those engines roaring mechs!” 

He didn’t hear it, but he felt the ‘roar’ as the engines fired up, the vibrations from them weren’t helping his strutless legs stay under him.

He did hear the loading ramp seal shut behind them as she led him further into the massive loading bay.

“What… what was that thing you signed?” He finally got out, the reality of the situation starting to dawn on him.

They were leaving… they weren’t just leaving Iacon, they were leaving Cybertron.

“Oh, you didn’t recognise it? That was you’re contract dear, Megatron’s relieved you of his employ, and with my designation on your contract, you work for me. Don’t worry, we don’t have any one optic murderous slaggers like Shockwave on board, that I can assure you.” 

She looked up and gave him such a bright and winning smile. “And don’t worry, you’ll make a wonderful addition to our nighttime entertainment roster, Mega was very flattering when he mentioned your performance skills!” 

Optimus felt like the world was falling out from under him.

No, that was his legs giving out and the slow mo free fall he experienced before Nebularburst managed to somehow catch his full weight. 

There was some curses flitting about in the air that he didn’t hear, but a few kliks later he felt the heavy vibrations of someone big running over.

He was scooped up into arms he swore were Strika’s, and caught a brief string of half formed words. 

“Go… sho… ward…  ou… go…”

And that was the last thing he remembered before his overtaxed processor went into full shut down.

----

For anyone interested, I drew Neb in the style of the AU yesterday and finished her off today

----

[dragongirl642]

Sunstreaker/Sideswipe x human!female!reader (bayverse) part 5

Recap:

Once he was calm, we hurried to collect the Allspark. That humming in my chest, just kept getting stronger and now it was accompanied by a sense of urgency from Starblaze but also this feeling of awesome power.

One thought crossed my mind. 'I got a bad feeling about this.'

-------------------------------------Recap end------------------------------------

I was riding an ATV following the transport units. My speciality is mobile battle. The modified ATV's two sub-automatic machine guns being my best friends in battle. Closely following my cousin's truck, I could clearly see Lennox sat in front of me, through the open back of the vehicle. He was briefing the unit on possible hostiles and giving the oh-so-positive, 'it's better to live to fight another day, than die doing a heroic stunt that gets you killed' kind of speech.

The Allspark and Sam were riding with Bumblebee up ahead. We were heading to Mission City; whilst there it should be easier to contact the copters and get the hell out of the Decepticon's reach. Keller agreed with the idea, so here we were.

Starblaze and the twins sent me encouraging pulses over our bond. 'Wait...I can feel the twins now too...must be a Gaian thing.'

I was busy watching William until I heard the roar of engines ahead. Holding the handlebars of my ATV steady, I twisted to look behind me. A blue Peterbuilt semi-trailer truck with flame decals (Optimus Prime), a silver Modified Pontiac Solstice GXP (Jazz), a black Modified GMC Topkick C4500 (Ironhide) and a Yellow Hummer H2 Search and Rescue SUV (Ratchet) were coming the other way. The songs bursting out of Bee's radio signalling that these were the other Autobots. They passed us and I heard the squeal of tires as they made u-turns at breakneck speed. 'But then again they don't have necks to break in that form'. They began gaining on us from behind.

My ATV's inbuilt radio crackled, orders to fall back and hold the rear; I complied. I slowed and allowed them to pass me. William threw me a thumbs up from the back of his truck, I sent back a small wave. We continued in this formation, Mission city in our sights.

As we joined the main highway, civilian cars either side. I heard metallic clicking behind me. Yet again I twisted to look and wished I hadn't. 'Scrap'. I faced forward and hit the throttle. Shooting forward just in time to avoid the metallic fist that came down were I had been moments before. I powered forward passed the Semi as it transformed into a tall, powerful looking Autobot. 'The red and blue really suit him'. He began skating and turned back to face the threat. I weaved my way through the other Autobots and came up behind Lennox. He looked at me as I jokingly called, "Definitely a Decepticon...get ready to have some fun", as I flicked the switch on my ATV's dash to power up my guns. The blur of motion as the chambers spun and set, hitting home. One recruit went completely white. 'Hope he doesn't throw up...too late...that's gonna be a mess to clean up later'.

We made it to the city. The communication with the Nellis Air Force base lifting spirits; help was on the way. The first transport units sending out fire teams to clear buildings and set up sniper points. The Autobots transformed and we spread out. I parked further up the street with my guns pointed towards the highway. The whine of an F-22 Raptor was heard. 'Thank God they're here...wait that was too quick, something's wrong'. I opened my mouth to call my cousin just as smoke flares were sent up. The Raptor changing course, heading straight for our position. I set my guns, plotting its trajectory. Good thing too...it was a Decepticon. The Black Autobot, Ironhide, called a name; "Starscream". Bumblebee and Ironhide picked up a truck as the jet transformed into a grey Seeler, 'seekey, seekser, oh...seeker I think it was'. Ironhide ordering everyone to "fall back". Starscream shot at them and the resulting explosion almost blinded me. My battle goggles tinting automatically. As the smoke cleared I could see that Bumblebee had been decapitated. Ironhide had been blasted backwards so poor Bee took the brunt of the shot.

Starscream stood over him, ready to give the finishing blow. Ironhide was coming around and the other Autobots were already springing into action, but an idea came to me, 'stupid but brilliant, as they say'.

I gunned the throttle, shooting forward at speed. I opened fire. Bullets distracting the seeker as I did one of those idiotic heroic stunts Lennox was talking about. Using a crushed car as a ramp, I leapt with my ATV, straight for the astonished Starscream. Knuckles white with the effort it took to stay seated as the wheels of my ATV struck his faceplate. I kept the throttle on as they gave him tyre burn. Also sending me into a backwards flip. 'This was not part of the plan'. Starscream fell back and holding his face transformed and flew off while I held on for dear life to my ATV. Thankfully it landed right way up, so I wasn't about to be a (y/n) pancake yet. But the resounding crack upon impact wasn't the most reassuring sound in the world.

Lennox sending me the radio version of an angry face. I just sent him back the radio version of a wink face. 'You gotta have a sense of humour in this job, otherwise I would've gone mad years ago'.

The sounds of battle crashed around me as I gunned the throttle once more. The familiar feeling of adrenaline filled me as I differed to my training, the battlefield becoming a blur.

I was moving, running, ducking through showers of bullets and firing my second sub-automatic machine gun, (I'd taken them off the ATV when it was scrapped by a Decepticon bullet shower). Just as I was about to turn a blast of wind rushed past, accompanied by a figure, 'no make that two'. The silver Autobot, Jazz, was being carried off by Megatron. The huge 'and I mean HUGE' scary looking leader of the Decepticons. Jazz was fighting bravely but I could already tell he was going to die. You would have to be able to fly to rescue him. 'WAIT A MINUTE'.

I ran for the building they were heading towards. Dropping my gun, I performed the transformation sequence as I ran. "Gaian fusion, partner up!" The transformation was quicker this time, maybe because I was in the middle of a battle.

With a powerful downthrust of my wings I was airborne and heading for the two mechs.

"You want a piece of me", I could hear Jazz's taunts. I raised my bow and drew back the string a glowing arrow taking form. It was growing the longer I held the bow taught, but I didn't give it time to grow. I let loose just as Megatron began to reply, "No I want..." The arrow hit his left servo. He yelled in pain and dropped Jazz, grabbing his injured servo with his good hand. On reflex I dived. My fingers finding the grooves in his armour, I took hold, and beat my wings furiously to slow us down. It worked and I deposited him on the floor. Floating before him I gave a quick nod before spotting my cousin over his shoulder.

Mouth agape, all surprised, he was quite the sight. Staring at me like I'd just turned into a 'wait'. The comic picture was broken by the sight of an injured brawl returning to his feet and aiming his gun for Lennox's unprotected back. I swooped forward. Shield at the ready I blocked the incoming fire. Ironhide, Ratchet and Jazz rushing back in to re-engage.

"How?...What?...When?...WHAT?" Lennox was spluttering and gaping like a fish. I composed myself, ready to tell him everything when he honestly surprised me. "You know what, tell me after we don't die" and he ran off.

The blur of battle setting in once more...this time though...I fought using my powers. Slash and parry, let loose a volley of small arrows, block, shield at the ready and begin again.

Startled once more out of my trance, by an almighty crash and the audible cracks of something very important. Glancing over my shoulder, Megatron is standing there, Optimus injured, sitting in a small pile of rubble, leaning against a damaged building and Sam running for his life. All the nearby soldier's radios crackled to life, Lennox's voice sounding from all around. #(y/n)...protect Sam#

I took the order to heart. 'So sweet of him to include me though' I thought, and vaulted over several cars to run beside the teen; along with Ironhide and Ratchet. Sam threw me an incredulous look but kept running. A Decepticon made a swing for him, raising my shield up to block the attack we slid under the blade. We kept running. The pounding in my ears almost drowning out the sound of Starscream engaging our two Autobot protectors.

A thump crashed behind, "Give me the cube boy!" Megatron was chasing us, 'well that's just fragging great now isn't it'. We didn't see the SUV till it was too late. I pushed Sam ahead, he fell and dropped the cube. A wave of power being discharged, hitting me and several machines; bringing them to life and causing general mayhem. While I dropped to a knee in pain. Heat flaring within my chest. The feeling of a sparkbeat began, then failed, then began again.

"Go Sam" I choked out before collapsing.

He ran on, darting into a relatively undamaged building. I lay there, wings twitching and body wracked by painful spasms. Images flashing through my mind, a planet wracked by war, a desperate plan, a secret, a void, "You will do my will"...and a dark voice. "They will never follow you brother". I watched helpless as two vast beings fought. Then the one who spoke last held out a hand, 13 pinpricks of light appeared and formed into, what I recognised, as cybertronians.

"Behold my Primes, they will be your undoing brother unless you turn back from this foolish path, return...please". The last part almost a whisper.

"NEVER!" The dark voice ringing in the void. It hurt.

A flash and the dark voice screamed, in pain and anger...slowly it faded, drifting away, swallowed by the void. I felt that kinder presence turn to me, "What you have seen young one, learn from it. You have felt the power of the Allspark and carry part of it within you, use it wisely." I felt myself being dragged away.

"Wait...what do you mean?" I called but no answer came. I was falling into a dark all-consuming abyss. Then a small spot of light appeared. I recognised it before it spoke. "Come back...partner" Starblaze. I followed and the light grew enveloping me.

I opened my eyes. I was lying on the ground, cheek pressed to the hard asphalt. Just in time to see my cousin perform another one of those heroic stunts'...on a motorcycle no less'.

Blackout fell and I slowly sat up. A headache slowly fading. 'When you're in the middle of a battle, you're not supposed to black out and hope for the best.' Silently berating myself, I stumbled to my feet, a cascading waterfall of dust and rubble falling of my body. 

Swaying I summoned my bow. Pulling back the string and taking aim. I could feel the F-22 raptor pilots panicking above as Starscream appeared in their midst. Lennox and the ground forces fired on Megatron, so did the remaining raptors. They were trying to expose his spark, but though he fell back there was still the protective layer of his spark chamber to contend with. 

I released the arrow. It struck home, burning through the final protective layer. Megatron howled in pain, Optimus using that moment to strike him. Grappling the two titans almost crushed Sam. I saw Optimus's dermas move but I didn't hear what he said. Nevertheless, Sam thrust his hands upwards, pushing the Allspark into Megatron's spark. Another white hot flare built in my chest and Megatron's spark shone and pulsed erratically. The Allspark burning up. Eventually it went dark and Megatron fell to the road, offline.

I ran over to Lennox, out of the corner of my eye, spotting Sam pick something up from the ground. He looked at me with a smile. I was not prepared to be picked up and spun like some doll by an over energised cousin. 'He's still in a battle high...great' I internally rolled my eyes.

When he put me down, he gave me a look up and down. I cocked my hips, giggled and gave a spin to show off my new look. My wings buffeted his face and he promptly sneezed. 'Who said I don't have a childish side'. The other members of the unit were looking at me in awe. One cheeky lad at the back even wolf-whistled.

"Ok, now I've seen it, is there any way to unsee it" he stated.

I performed the motions while calling "Power down" and with a flash of light I was back in uniform.

I watched as the Autobots and Sam gathered around Prime for a speech. I just smiled and turned back to my cousin. Opening my mouth to speak and finally explain my whole crazy story when I felt a tug within my heart.

Starblaze exuding waves of calm while the twins were frantically asking me whether I was ok. I responded yes and then their alt-modes just rolled, all calm like, out of a nearby alley and transformed.

With panicked yells everyone raised their weapons at the newcomers. "Whoa, hold your fire, hold your fire!" I called running in front of everyone, arms raised in the classic I-am-defending-this-person position. Lennox marched, like two steps, over to me, "Who are these guys?" He then studied me up and down, noting how I was calm and obviously protecting the trio, he rolled his weight onto his back foot and leisurely said, "Friends of yours?"

'How does he stay so calm?' I questioned in my head. I gestured behind me, "This is Starblaze, my Gaian partner and his siblings, the twins, Starocean and Starwave. I'll explain later Cousin..." I put on the most sweet voice I could, "I have something I need to discuss with dear Starblaze here." now I turned to Starblaze, "AND WHERE THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN, I'VE BEEN FIGHTING FOR MY LIFE AND YOU'VE BEEN CHILLIN' IN AN ALLEY THIS WHOLE TIME!" I was going into rant mode. "YOU COULD HAVE DECIDED TO HELP AT ANY MOMENT BUT NO..." Starblaze raised a hand for silence, cutting me off mid-rant.

He just looked at me, completely unimpressed, and said, "You're a competent fighter, I said we would come if you were in danger, you weren't. You are still alive are you not?"

'Oh that just takes the cake' I geared up for a real rant, I could feel my face going red as blood rushed to it. Some of the other soldiers, having realised these were friends, wore broad grins on their faces, just waiting for the show to begin.

"Should we run", said Starwave. "Probably" replied his twin and they slowly backed off hands raised, leaving their older brother to face his partner's fury.

Of course they didn't get off that easy,

.

.

.

The Autobots had noticed the new arrivals.

[the-odd-job]

Ashes of Icarus chapter 5 - (Don’t) Take a  Hint

Rating: Explicit Warnings: Chose Not to Use Category: Other Fandom: Transformers Characters: Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, Megatron Relationships: Megatron/Sunstreaker, Sideswipe & Sunstreaker Additional Tags: Dubcon, Unplanned Pregnancy, Mechpreg, Sticky Words: 5365

And then they FUCKED.

It’s dubcon, so watch out for that.

( Previous )

It turned out that the Decepticons had probably gotten what they wanted before Megatron called their retreat, because again there was a length of time with absolutely nothing happening. Ratchet fixed him up good, as he did with Sideswipe, they touched up their paint jobs and polished themselves to a fine shine Sideswipe was inevitably going to ruin within the span of a couple of hours–

And things went back to normal. Although Sunstreaker did get reminders from Optimus, Prowl, Ironhide, even Jazz about how he shouldn’t fight Megatron all on his own.

Were they all so damn worried about him dying? Primus, he’d survived worse. Now, if Megatron had actually fired, that was one thing, but…

Okay, so maybe he had possibly come very close to losing his damn life, and maybe no one just wanted to see him dying despite how talented he was at making everyone’s life hell on Earth.

As he proceeded to do with Tracks. Again. Something or other about their simultaneous washrack use. Again.

Prowl deemed it not severe enough to throw him into the brig this time, but he did assign him to the less desirable patrol routes.

And it didn’t show in his expression or voice, but Sunstreaker could have sworn the tactician took sadistic pleasure in doing that, knowing how much Sunstreaker hated the backwoods dirt roads. Sideswipe didn’t particularly enjoy them either, for that matter. He didn’t care so much about the dirt itself, or the rocks that flew up to ding their finish, but it was just uncomfortable to drive on. They were sports cars for Primus’ sake! They barely had any ground clearance.

The moment there was a bump on the road, it was their undercarriage that hit it.

That, that right there, was torture, and Prowl just put them to it, because it was that or something even more unpleasant. And oh, Prowl would come up with something even more unpleasant if he was pushed.

Past experience told as much. He could get deviously creative when he wanted to.

Or maybe he collaborated with Jazz for the best/worst ideas. It was a surprise Optimus even allowed some of the things he’d put the twins up to over the years. 

At least he hadn’t denied them access to washracks, this time. That was the only thing that made the damned patrols even somewhat bearable, knowing he could have a hot shower afterwards, followed by a few hours of tending to his finish. 

Sideswipe only ever stuck around for the first half an hour, but that was fine as long as they got all the parts he couldn’t reach on his own before his brother ran off to do whatever he was itching to do that time. It provided Sunstreaker with some quiet alone time that he was never too opposed to—a chance to bring out his other paints and the canvases that weren’t just his own frame.

He had some creativity he needed to unleash regularly, after all—besides finding creative ways to tear others apart.

What could he say, he was an artist of several kinds. 

And it kept him out of public spaces, even if just momentarily. Everyone except Red Alert was just happy when he stayed in their quarters for a bit, Sunstreaker himself too.

Red Alert, he just thought they were only moments for Sunstreaker to plot something nefarious. To be fair, he sometimes did. Painting freed his mind for other things, detached him enough that he could let his thoughts loose without physically letting loose on the same go. Mix colors, brush strokes… Planning the ways to achieve the results he wanted. It was all so familiar. Just as familiar as taking life was. 

Only considerably more peaceful, no?

Sadly, the relaxation never lasted long after he had to return to the day to day grind of putting up with everyone’s raging stupidity. How his comrades didn’t tear each other to shreds, he didn’t understand. Or was it just him who found practically everything they did aggravating?

Could be that.

But as much of a dark and broody loner as he was, he did have some company he kept relatively peacefully. Everyone got along with Jazz, for one, and Mirage… As different as their backgrounds were, they shared enough similarities that they’d—eventually—bonded.

After Sunstreaker had torn the noble to pieces enough times for being a stuck up little bitch.

They got along now, though, much to the surprise of many.

And Bluestreak. Mech had a way of worming under your plating. The grey Praxian sat next to him now, with Sideswipe on his other side and Jazz and Mirage opposite of them on the other side of the table. They talked and laughed around him, naturally incorporating him into the conversation through Sideswipe, but letting his contribution be little more than the occasional grunt or half-smile.

If he felt like saying something, he would, but… Really, he was content to let Sideswipe handle that part.

He knew these were mecha that were glad Megatron hadn’t offed him. Friends. Around them he could almost feel relieved that Optimus had shown up when he did.

Almost.

A larger part of him still wanted to find out what would have happened without the Prime’s interruption.

------------------------------------------------------

“Two more patrols of this, then we’ll be free!” Sideswipe rejoiced as they turned from one dirt road onto another. The scenery at least was about as pretty as an organic planet could ever manage, lush forest surrounding them from two sides. Only their engines drowned out the natural sounds of the place.

Too bad he was a little too busy trying to avoid the unbecoming bumps and dips on the sorry excuse of a road to pay much attention to it.

“Two patrols too many,” Sunstreaker grumbled as another rock was sent flying by his wheel and hit him on the side of his chassis.

Fuck this, seriously.

“Shh, focus on the upside!” Sideswipe admonished him, revving his engine and accelerating just in time to really launch himself off the top of the small hill they were climbing.

Sunstreaker ignored the rocks and discomfort and followed suit, enjoying the short moment of his frame suspended on thin air–

Before gravity pulled him back down with a hard shove to his shocks.

More or less worth it, anyway. This would’ve been so much more fun on asphalt, though. 

“Besides, isn’t this good inspiration for your art?” his twin continued, and Sunstreaker grunted noncommittally. It was, once he would be able to review his memory files. Incorporating the alien aspects of organic lifeforms into his work was a project he had worked on for a while now.

The results were pretty good, so far. The touch of unrealness of alien worlds added a nice new dimension to things.

No doubt Sideswipe would have had more to say, but he didn’t get the chance before their scanners picked up a Decepticon signature ahead of them. That was… Unexpected. 

Then again this had to be a patrol route for a reason. Maybe that reason was about to become apparent to them.

Once they got close enough to scan for a spark signature, though…

“What the pit is he doing here by himself?” Sideswipe hissed at him urgently at the same time as a surge of emotions he probably shouldn’t have felt burst in Sunstreaker’s core. Curiosity. Excitement. Anticipation.

Sideswipe took note of that. Sunstreaker could feel his exasperation and the is this seriously how we’re going to die, but nevertheless his brother just asked, “Do you want to report this in?”

No. No, he didn’t want to. Even if getting answers cost him his life, he didn’t want to. 

It turned out they couldn’t have even if they’d wanted to, once he checked. Someone was jamming communications signals.

Which likely suggested Soundwave was present, too.

It was like they were driving straight into a trap.

So be it.

They drove until they reached a small clearing. Megatron was standing there in the middle of it, his back to them, arms clasped behind him—and sure enough, Soundwave was standing off to the side, watching their arrival.

They could’ve flown away if they’d wanted to, with the power of Sideswipe’s jetpack. Or tried to. Megatron and Soundwave could’ve tried to shoot them down, too, but the fact remained that they weren’t fully cornered even if they had no way to contact someone for backup.

And no will to do so, but no one needed to know that.

They were at a significant disadvantage, though. Soundwave they could’ve taken on, but Megatron… And that wasn’t even going into the fact the host might have his cassettes ready to be ejected. For all they knew they could be outnumbered as well as outclassed within a moment’s notice.

Sideswipe wasn’t fearful, but tense and cautious, prepared for the worst. Sunstreaker wasn’t fearful, but vibrating with anticipation. That could easily be mistaken for the anger he was known for, though, after they pulled their fields in tight.

If they weren’t in the presence of a telepath, anyway.

Whatever this was… They’d play.

“What’s this?” Sideswipe asked after they’d transformed, a smile on his face and none of the tension in him visible on the outside. “Weren’t expecting company on this fine day! Came to enjoy the scenery too? Gotta say, it’s pretty awesome for a mudball like this, Sunny’s getting so many ideas to use in his paintings.”

No one cut him off, but no one acknowledged what he’d said, either. 

Silence only reigned for a moment, though. Megatron was the one to break it, finally turning to face them. “I was interrupted last time,” he said, his optics zeroing in on Sunstreaker.

Sunstreaker bared his denta and growled.

“That will not happen this time,” the warlord went on to announce, ignoring the threat aimed at him.

“What, gonna finish what you started and shoot me dead?” Sunstreaker asked before barking out a laugh. “Over my dead body.”

No fear, no hesitation, call it bravery or call it stupidity, but it was Sunstreaker that closed the distance between them, attacking the tyrant and no one else. Sideswipe went for Soundwave instead, and it was such, such a bad idea to split themselves up like this…

They did it anyway. One on one.

Make it real.

Megatron was ready for him, of course he was. He took his attack, deflected it, made one of his own… Treated him like an opponent. Fought. 

And Sunstreaker made him do it. He didn’t hold back, and he was aiming for the kill, because what else could he want to do? Megatron had to step up to the challenge or lose his life.

That was how things were supposed to be. Earn your right to live. Nothing was handed to you for free. You had to take.  

And Megatron, if anyone, should understand that. Look at the hole they’d both crawled out of—the Pits were behind them, their parent and mentor. They spoke the language. Fighter. Warrior.

Gladiator. 

Between this attack and the next, Sunstreaker pulled out his thermal sword, activated the blade, and sliced at Megatron’s armor. Even at partial heat the edge cut into the warlord’s plating with all the ease a heated weapon would.

Megatron had to jump out of the way, although actually putting him on the defensive was nigh impossible.

Sunstreaker would try anyway.

“I remember you.” The words were growled, sending a shiver down his back.

They didn’t distract him.

“Do you, now?”

“You and your brother.” Megatron released his own sword, and he could almost hear it—the roar and dull pounding of spectators, bright lights bearing down on them to make them visible for all to see…

They’d been here before, just like this. 

“What do you remember?” Sunstreaker asked, his face twisting into a snarl as one sword blocked the other.

But his spark was spinning like a wild thing, excitement and the rightness of the situation driving it mad. 

If he’d die, this would be the way to go, testing his mettle against a worthy opponent—just like he would have in another lifetime. 

“A deathmatch,” Megatron answered, and Sunstreaker’s optics burned brighter. “Between you and I.

“Only, we were interrupted.”

They were.

Sideswipe was paying more attention to him and Megatron than he was paying to Soundwave, but it was clear why. It was as if both Sideswipe and Soundwave were trying to keep the other from getting involved in the fight between Megatron and Sunstreaker—and when their goal was mutual, there wasn’t a whole left for them to do except some token attacks that hardly even constituted as proper fighting. 

This was between Sunstreaker and Megatron.

As it had once been.

“You spared me,” Sunstreaker grunted. He bolted to the side, but Megatron’s sword managed to cut him. Shallow.

“You were there against your will,” Megatron gave the same reason he had given then.  

“You made an example out of us.” A feign to the side, then a strike, the heat of his blade melting Megatron’s armor–

Sideswipe. Sideswipe had lifted the gate into the arena and ran between him and the killing blow.

No!

The fight never should have happened. Sunstreaker never stood a chance, did he? Not against Megatron.

But he didn’t get to say yes or no to who he fought. 

It was the folly of a greedy mech and it should have cost him his life. It should have cost Sideswipe his life. 

Instead… Here they were. Still fighting.

“You represented everything that was wrong with Cybertron,” Megatron said, with heat—just as he had spoken with passion then when he had addressed the crowds, fearless of their reaction.

When he had gone against every rule of the arenas and not killed in a fight to the death. 

But Megatron had already been a champion. He’d fought his way to the top, bought his own freedom, he’d rallied together a rebellion—you didn’t tell that Megatron what to do.

Especially not when he believed in something. 

“Yeah, well, thanks for that.” He rather liked living, it was nice to get to continue to do that. Was the rumble of Megatron’s engine amused now, though?

He could be imagining things. 

“You were a berserker,” Megatron said then, a heavy torrent of attacks forcing Sunstreaker to jump back once, twice, thrice, before he brought his sword up and put an end to it. 

Because he could. He had the skill for it. The strength, even if that was lesser than Megatron’s. “I was.” He could turn the tables, go on the offensive—force Megatron to think his actions carefully, lest the smoldering blade struck him somewhere important. 

“I haven’t seen you snap even once here on Earth.” But just the same, Megatron could flip that table right back around, and he did so, violently. Sunstreaker strafed to the side before he had his arm chopped off.

“I’ve gotten better.” Pits. He hadn’t realized how much he’d missed this. War, battles… War was messy. There were too many players and moving parts for it to be anything else. Guns, mines, missiles, bombs. Even once the frontline charged and clashed together in close combat—so many players. There was motion everywhere around you, dozens of targets and threats you needed to track at any given moment.

It was a desperate struggle for survival.

He loved it.

But this. To have just one to focus on and have their focus entirely on you, to give your all against that singular opponent. It tested a slightly different skill set, for sure, but it felt like the truer challenge, cleaner—a true test of your artistry.

Or maybe that was just the gladiator in him talking. He was that before he was a soldier… Always would be.

“Is it something to get better from?”

What..?

Surprise, that damned thing. It should never take a hold of you when every fraction of a second counted.

But like he was a damned rookie, Sunstreaker faltered from the unexpected, and paid for it. Megatron could have cut his helm off in that moment, or impaled him somewhere painful, but he… Didn’t. Oh, he used Sunstreaker’s momentary distraction, but only to slam his arm to the side of his helmet—and Megatron was big, as were his arms. The strength and momentum of that one strike were well enough to send Sunstreaker flying into the ground, landing heavily and without finesse.

His grunt was a quiet thing, and his mind—reeling for a moment too long. Megatron’s pede landed on his chassis, he snatched his sword from his grip, and just like that, it was over.

And Sunstreaker had lost, again, due to a stupid mistake he should have had all the experience to avoid. 

“A-a-aa,” Megatron tutted when Sideswipe tried to break from Soundwave and come to Sunstreaker’s aid, as he always would. Instead of being allowed to do that this time, instead of being allowed to change the course of things… Megatron’s fusion cannon came to life, aiming at Sunstreaker’s helm.

Sideswipe took the threat for what it was and stopped, glaring at Megatron. Soundwave followed a step behind him, and just like that they continued their scuffle, although this time their goals did not align.

With Sideswipe distracted by his Third, Megatron shifted his attention back to Sunstreaker. The cannon… Moved away, died down.

Huh. Apparently he wasn’t going to get shot today. Fancy that.

“If you’re not going to kill me, what the slag do you want?” Sunstreaker growled, digging his digits into Megatron’s ankle, but it did him no good. The pede stayed right where it was, pinning him into the ground with enough force to test the strength of his armor. 

He might’ve asked, but Sunstreaker… Had an inkling already.

And if he was right…

Primus. He didn’t want to show it, and he didn’t know if Soundwave informed Megatron of it, but his spark was fragging fluttering from what wasn’t anything other than hopeful excitement. His field he kept to himself, but it would’ve been a sickening thing of heat and anticipation.

His ventilations ran hot, but that could just be because of the fight.

Yeah right.

But he snarled at Megatron, engine revving in fruitless threat. What threat was he? Oh, he was a threat just by existing. He hadn’t lost because he couldn’t take it anymore, he had lost because of a mistake he wouldn’t repeat—Megatron would have to defend himself all over again, it was just a matter of time.  

Unfortunately, while waiting for that moment the tyrant did have him in a rather precarious situation. Sideswipe went down with some angry cursing too, and Soundwave pinned him there very thoroughly.

He could watch, but it was clear the Decepticons on the scene didn’t plan on letting him be an interruption to whatever it was Megatron wanted.

And it would still be a while before anyone on the Ark would notice they weren’t checking in as they were supposed to.

In short: no one would save him this time.

A smelting puff of air escaped his vents at the thought. His digits on Megatron’s pede tightened, but he glowered up at the tyrant towering over him.

Tall, imposing, and powerful.

Primus help him.

Megatron raised an optical ridge at him. “Do you not know already?”

“I have a few ideas.”

“I’m sure one of them is correct.”

Bastard was fragging teasing him. Sunstreaker growled in earnest, but Megatron merely crouched, removing his pede from his chassis only to grab him by the throat instead.

And Vector Sigma but the hold was tight. Sunstreaker’s servos grabbed at Megatron’s wrist, but he could tug and claw it all he wanted, twist and buck with all his might—Megatron didn’t even bother to react to his struggles.

By the Thirteen, he was going to lose his mind at this rate. 

His engine was roaring, definitely out of anger and not… Anything else, but when he’d thought it was going to throttle itself out–

Megatron reached between his legs and cupped his scorching panel–

And his engine reached a whole new level he wasn’t sure it had ever visited before. Sunstreaker stared at the blue blue sky far above with its occasional puffy white cloud, trying not to pay too much attention to the red optics focused on him and just him. 

He was going to fragging die, and Megatron was going to be the cause of it.

“Want it, hm?” the tyrant asked, his claws digging into the seams of his interface panel.

Sunstreaker found the state of mind to growl, and even managed a glare at his assailant despite the static dancing in his vision. “Go to hell.”

Megatron ignored him. “Open.”

No one to save him.

Sideswipe was looking, struggling against Soundwave’s hold the same Sunstreaker was struggling against Megatron, but it got neither of them anywhere.

So utterly helpless…

Because they were so severely outclassed. Maybe not by Soundwave, but definitely by Megatron. The leader of the Decepticons, one who’d managed to keep his position for a very good reason despite the many rumored attempts to overthrow him–

He was holding Sunstreaker down, his claws painful where they pressed into the sensitive paneling, demanding.

Not asking.

Demanding.

His vents were blown wide but even that wasn’t enough to cool him. 

“Do you want me to tear this off? That’ll be quite something to explain, won’t it?” Megatron asked casually, and Sunstreaker… Considered it. 

“Bastard,” he snarled, bucking away from Megatron’s hold—definitely not into it—but it did nothing to dislodge the claws hooked into the covering protecting his array.

And he considered it.

Those marks alone would be difficult to explain, but at least they were something he and Sideswipe could try to get rid of on their own.

There wouldn’t be much they could do about an entirely missing cover, damaged in the process of its removal. That would lead to questions, ones he’d really rather not answer.

Sunstreaker grit his denta, glared harder, but sent the command to retract his valve cover.

Megatron’s digits dipped into his valve instantly and this time he couldn’t keep his frame from jerking into the penetration. He had to bite back a groan.

“Soaked,” the tyrant noted after he fetched his digits. Lubricant was dripping down them liberally, and that was nothing compared to the pool his valve was leaking onto the ground between his legs.

Legs that Megatron forcibly spread, despite Sunstreaker’s attempt at kicking him. It did him no more good than anything else he’d done so far had. Megatron pressed on his throat harder, practically digging his frame into the dirt, and he should’ve hated it. Did hate the grime that was digging into the gaps of his armor.

That’d be hell to clean later.

But his core ached. The temperature of his frame kept on rising despite the best attempts of his fans and vents, and Megatron was between his goddamn legs…

A click. Sunstreaker couldn’t look, not with Megatron’s hold of him, but oh, Sideswipe could, and Sunstreaker trembled at the things he saw.

He would love this, Sideswipe informed him. 

Sunstreaker had few doubts about that.

Megatron’s digits returned to his valve, shoving inside and scissoring—stretching him, prepping him, and Sunstreaker writhed. This time he couldn’t contain his strangled groan, his valve rippling around the invading claws despite himself. He was panting, hard, and Pits but Megatron had barely even started yet. 

Death by overheating, that was his future. 

He cursed, rather loudly so, when Megatron removed his digits again. This time the rumble of the tyrant’s engine was definitely amused, but before Sunstreaker could take offense with that, something big nosed up against his valve entrance.

...But didn’t enter.

He was going to glitch.

“Do you want me to put it in?”

It took him an embarrassing amount of time to gather his thoughts enough to snap a sharp, “Frag no,” complete with an angry growl from his engine.

Megatron didn’t take heed. “Mmm, your body disagrees,” was all he said, brushing his damned spike against his valve again, but not going in.

And Sunstreaker’s self control was quickly unraveling. That only angered him further, and Sideswipe’s amusement didn’t help matters any—but what the pit was Megatron waiting for?

For him to say yes? Tell him to put it in? Beg for it?

Hell no. He’d rust before he did any of that. 

Or rather, redlined his systems from frustration.

“My body’s mistaken,” Sunstreaker nevertheless found the strength to snarl, bucking—to fight against Megatron’s grip, of course, and not to force the spike into his valve already.

But Megatron pulled back just enough to keep that from happening. Sunstreaker’s engine revved and he had to bite his glossa to keep himself from just screaming.

Sideswipe was chortling to himself.

“I’m not convinced,” Megatron growled too this time, and then–

Then, in one thrust of his hips, he’d driven his spike into his valve, all the way, until it rammed against his ceiling node.

And now Sunstreaker screamed. His frame arched out of his control, overload—just from that—tensing him from helm to pede to a painful degree. He ground his denta together, twice as hard when Megatron began to move through the crest of his climax, extending it, turning his vision into a bloom of static.

He couldn’t but feel, the strength in Megatron’s frame that he effortlessly translated into fucking him hard. Hard as he fought, and just as violent, he drove into Sunstreaker’s frame without a shred of mercy, rutting him into the goddamn ground until he ached. Every thrust in split him wide, filled him to the brim—opened him up like only someone of Megatron’s size and demeanor even could. 

He’d never enjoyed interfacing with Optimus, despite the Prime’s titillating size. He was too kind, too gentle, too worried about his partner’s comfort.

Megatron was the black opposite. He didn’t give a fuck about Sunstreaker’s anything outside of how he could best use his frame to derive his own pleasure from it. Or so it felt like. Hell, maybe this was Megatron’s way of making sure Sunstreaker’s needs were seen to as well, because his lines sang with charge until not one thought shot straight. 

He hadn’t been fucked like this since the Pits. He’d almost forgotten what real interfacing was like.

This was real. His frame made good of what limited freedom of motion it had to rock into Megatron’s thrusts, driving their arrays together ever harder until he was sure something was going to dent. Megatron seemed intent on exiling all lucid thinking with the way he pulled out almost all the way before pushing in a single smooth motion that wreaked havoc on his sensors, fast and hard and faster and harder.

Considering the way Sunstreaker’s thoughts scattered to the four winds, he was doing a very good job of that.

Sunstreaker couldn’t stand it. Pinned to the ground and utterly marauded, the charge in his systems rapidly climbed higher until peaked, again. 

And then he came crashing down, screaming anew at the strength of the overload that pulled every cable tight, arching his frame against Megatron’s.

His valve tightened and rippled around the intrusion, and after three more jerking thrusts against him, Megatron rumbled, tensed, and heat bloomed at the end of his valve. The charge from Megatron’s release jumped into his frame and drove him over the edge into yet another overload of his own until his vocalizer spat fitful static.

Sunstreaker slumped into the ground in the aftermath, his extremities shaking, vents pulling in all the cool air they could.

It wasn’t enough.

He was given a moment. Megatron took a moment. Both their frames were cycling air desperately—or maybe Sunstreaker just wanted to believe Megatron was even halfway as affected as he was—slowly making their way down from the summits of physical rapture.

The tyrant pulled out soon enough though, leaving Sunstreaker’s valve an abused, gaping pit. A veritable flood of fluids followed his retreat, too, lubricant and transfluid mingling together into a holy mess.

And Sunstreaker…

Sunstreaker snarled. “You son of a bitch–”

But he didn’t get further than that before Megatron caught him by the jaw, silencing him. The tyrant was staring down at him with baleful optics, and a small portion of Sunstreaker wondered if the warlord wasn’t going to kill him now, after having had his fun. 

If that was the case, his corpse would tell a story he did not want told.

But Megatron didn’t immediately remove his helm from his shoulders. “You will say,” he started instead, glancing briefly but meaningfully at Sideswipe before his optics returned to Sunstreaker, “that you ran into a small number of my troops. A battle ensued, and you drove them away, but not without damage to yourselves.” 

Sunstreaker’s optics flicked to Sideswipe as the jam on their comm. systems was lifted. Sideswipe stared back at him for a second before opening a comm. line to Ark. “Sideswipe to Ark,” he said, outloud as well as over the link. “Hi Jazz! Yeah, sorry for not checking in, buuuut we actually found something. I think.

“We ran into a few of the Constructicons and a couple of Seekers at these coordinates. No clue what they were after ‘cause this is the ass end of fragging nowhere if I do say so myself, but me’n Sunny fought ‘em off. Sustained some injuries, Sunny especially, but we’re fine.”

A pause as Sideswipe listened to Jazz’s response. Sunstreaker had no doubt Soundwave was listening in on that side of the conversation too.

“Yeah, sure, we’ll have a look around. I’ll call ya back if we come across anything, else we’ll wait until Grapple and co get here. Sideswipe out.”

Sideswipe cut the call and looked at Megatron. The tyrant nodded his approval at him before Sunstreaker became the target of his attention once more. The grip on his jaw tightened a fraction before Megatron pulled him up and leaned down himself–

His helm tilted, their lips touched.

Sunstreaker’s optics blew wide and he could hear the shocked stutter of Sideswipe’s engine.

It was a brief thing, but not without fire—rough, just like the rest of Megatron. Intense in the way the warlord’s lips pressed hard against his own.

Then it was over. Megatron released him and Sunstreaker barely caught himself with his arms before he would’ve fallen back down. In one fluid motion Megatron rose to his pedes, retracting his equipment as he went and closing his spike behind its panel, towering above Sunstreaker.

Soundwave got up too, releasing Sideswipe.

Neither twin tried to get up just yet.

“Think about what I said, Sunstreaker. Until next time,” Megatron said with intent before he walked over to his Third. Soundwave transformed onto the tyrant’s palm, then Megatron transformed into his jet mode around Soundwave. A wave of displaced air washed over the twins as the Decepticons left the scene.

They listened to the retreating sound of Megatron’s thrusters until it was gone and silence fell back onto the area. True silence, not even the critters of the forest making sound after the amount of disturbances in the area. There was nothing but the rustle of wind in the leaves.

And disbelief.

“…So…” Sideswipe eventually spoke up, getting onto his hands and knees and crawling over to Sunstreaker, inspecting the damage on his frame and the… Mess at his crotch. “…That just happened.”

That it did. Sunstreaker nodded slowly, trying to sort his thoughts into some semblance of order, but… He’d probably be working at that for a while still.

“We should… We should probably make things a little less, uh… Incriminating,” Sideswipe continued, glancing around. There were signs of fighting around them, but they should probably add to them after lying about the amount of mecha present. Plus some marks of gunfire maybe.

And… Clean Sunstreaker.

And do something about the puddle he was sitting in.

…And the paint transfers.

Sunstreaker nodded again and reached into his subspace to begin the process. They'd want to be done with all that before their comrades arrived, after all.

( Next )

[afterspark-podcast]

G1 Episode 35: Transcript

Episode Show Notes

[This can also be found on AO3!]

[Stinger]

S: It's like, we do get a view of what the robots seem like to the humans and it’s basically that they're massive dumbasses. 

[Intro Music]

O: Hello, and welcome to the Afterspark Podcast, an episode by episode recap of the Generation 1 Transformers cartoon.  I'm Owls.

S: And I'm Specs.

O: And today we're gonna be talking about episode number 35: Desertion of the Dinobots, Part 1. Let's talk about giant robots today, shall we?

S: Sure.

O: And I got a new mic! So hopefully I sound a little bit better because my headset mic was disappointing. 

S: You sound good to me.

O: [Laughter] I'm just hoping for an improvement, quite frankly. Today we open on a wide green field where a scientist is flying an unmanned drone via a remote.

S: The Autobots are, you know, very complimentary towards the- about the drones maneuvers and a few feet away Soundwave clearly wants a break from Decepticon shenanigans and is taking a nap in Ironhide's backseat with Blaster.

O: A very strange booty call, perhaps? 

S: Either that or him and Blaster just have, you know, scheduled naps in and, unbeknownst, to Ironhide he was their next meeting spot.

O: That seems rude to a coworker, but- but what do I know about Autobot co-worker shenanigans? Ravage then ejects from Soundwave, who is still a boom box, uh, before being detained by Blaster.

S: Did Blaster not want Ravage tattling about what they do in their downtime? 

O: Possibly. You mean boombox cuddling? Blaster kind of finishes transforming? He’s like half transformed grabbing Ravage and Soundwave gets bumped out of Ironhide before transforming himself and just flying off.

S: Oh and, to clarify, the entire scuffle with Blaster and Ravage is literally inside Ironhide's, um, caboose? 

O: Yeah they basically-

S: Trunk? I don’t know what-

O: [Laughter] The back part of his van. Basically, Ravage tackles Blaster and they sort of fall back into Ironhide. [Laughter]

S: Yeah. Yeah, it just makes the entire thing pretty awkward.

O: Why? You don't wake up with one of your mortal enemies in your backseat every day, Specs? 

S: Well, I sure as hell hope not.

O: [Laughter] 

S: So, you know, Ironhide it has some, you know,  junk going on in his- in his trunk, you see. 

O: Lord, not again. Why is it always Ironhide? It’s always Ironhide! [Laughter] 

S: He has a lot of space. 

O: This shot is just so awkward, anyway, it definitely looks like Ravage is topping Blaster inside of Ironhide and, I mean, I definitely believe that Ravage is probably a top but wow! That van is just rockin right there. [Laughter] And then Soundwave flies over to Megatron and Starscream who are hanging out upon a convenient verdant hillside.

S: And, honestly, they’re right in plain sight so I don't really get why no one notices them. The Autobots don't notice them. The humans don't notice them. Did they use an invisibility spray again or can we just see them because we're breaking the fourth wall?

O: Ah, I believe that's the power of plot convenience I smell. 

S: Starscream prepares to shoot the drone but Megatron knocks his arm down with a great bonk effect, saying something about needing to be more discreet. 

O: Discreet! You’re all standing out in the open! Soundwave was chilling in Ironhide five minutes ago, for Pete's sake!

S: Starscream says what we're all thinking, “Since when has discretion mattered to us?”

O: Megatron hands over something to him and says to use it on the drone.

S: And then, back to our opening scene, it appears Ironhide has woken up and would like to know what the fuck is going on. 

O: [Laughter] Ravage runs off and Blaster gets dumped on the ground as Ironhide transforms.

S: No one is having a good day.

O: No one is having a good day. [Laughter] 

S: Blaster explains this only as, “Rockin and rollin with savage Ravage,” which does not make it sound any less dirty. 

O: Nope.

S: Or less risque?

O: [Laughter] Ironhide exclaims that they need to tell Prime that, “Decepticons are afoot,” but considering we see the Autobots watching the drone which Starscream is flying directly over I feel like they should probably know already.

S: Yeah, I mean-

O: And- 

S: None of them have very good observational skills, let's just go with that.

O: No they don’t.

S: Except Perceptor. 

O: Yeah, but I don't think Percy's here today so they can't see shit. [Laughter] 

S: Percy's busy doing science. 

O: Percy’s, you know, busy doing his actual job, duh.

S: Man, speaking of the drone, it has a pretty weird design. Like, why does it have cockpits, let alone two? 

O: No freaking idea. Starscream drops the device Megatron gave him onto the drone and then it explodes.

S: Like what was the point of this entire thing? 

O: I don’t- don’t really know what this accomplished at all.

S: Yeah, yeah so Blaster and Ironhide run up to warn Optimus and then Blaster says that he just went three rounds with Ravage.

O: Jesus Christ. you two! This is a children’s show! [Laughter] 

S: So the Autobots roll out to check the wreckage because no one is going to address what Blaster just said.

O: [Laughter] No one- no one is going to address this. Okay!

S: Yeah and so along with them are: Jazz, Hound, and Mirage who were also, I guess, just hanging out doing whatever. 

O: Not fucking Ravage? [Laughter]

S: [Laughter]

O: But Megatron has a scheme while the Autobots are distracted. To which I say he could have just left Ravage in Ironhide’s back seat I feel like that was distracting enough but what do I know?

S: I don't know, man. And- and onwards to a very 80s lab in stylish Autobot orangey-yellow.

O: Don't you just hate it when you're working and the entirety of Decepticon High Command Kool-Aid Man's their way into your workspace?

S: Yeah and, honestly, Starscream just looks weirdly pale in this shot. Maybe imitating the Kool-Aid Man doesn't agree with him. 

O: See I think they just failed to get his makeup right for this shot, don't you?

S: Yeah, yeah, I think that's more likely.

O: [Laughter] 

S: Megatron tells the scientists to hand over the blueprints and he'll let them live.

O: Starscream gets mad and thinks Megatron's being soft and stomps in and picks up one of the scientists, threatening him with his null-ray.

S: It's like, Starscream, I'm not sure what that's- 

O: Helping? 

S: Yeah.

O: How is that helping? 

S: Yeah. The scientist just, like, points out where the blueprints are- are stored and then he's perfectly fine when Starscream just tosses them to the ground so, it’s like, okay? 

O: They go to open the vault, but the Autobots arrive. 

S: Why is the vault so big? Because it's, like, Decepti- it's like giant robot scaled.

O: They have extra big secrets to store inside? 

S: Oh god it's like the ‘her hair’s so big it's full of secrets.’

O: Except a door, a vault. Whatever.

S: Yeah. Oh and Jazz proceeds to distract Starscream with, you know, his loud music and light show.

O: But Megatron is apparently unaffected by this and goes to shoot the Autobots but then his fusion cannon is yanked off his arm by an invisible Mirage.

S: Mirage actually gets to use his ability today! 

O: What a concept.

S: Yeah.

O: And then Megatron basically runs over and kicks Mirage in the nads in an effort to grab his fusion cannon back from him.

S: No one's having a good day. [Laughter] 

O: [Laughter] No one is having a good day. 

S: And then Megs is then seen across the room, beckoning Soundwave and Starscream to follow him out of their Kool-Aid Man hole. 

O: Soundwave and Starscream clearly don't have any peripheral vision to speak of, you know, like the Autobots, and fly off- not noticing that the real Megatron is still very much in the same room as them and very much still trying to get this fusion cannon back from Mirage.

S: A fusion cannon and tug of war just doesn't seem to go well for anyone.

O: Right! Well, they're doing it from the sides, they're doing the smart thing where I don't think they're pulling on the actual barrel but, you know, while it’s pointed at them but still, yes.

S: Yeah, but yeah, you're right no one has peripheral vision or you know any observational skills. 

O: It was funny, too, when we were watching it, cuz even I was like, how the fuck did he get over there? And I totally thought it was an animation error. [Laughter]

S: I mean, if there was smoke or something you could forgive-

O: Yeah, yeah.

S: There is zero smoke. 

O: Yeah, there's nothing, like, you know, making it harder for them to see or anything. 

S: Yeah, and then Optimus comes in out of stage left, kicking Megatron, you know, in his keister, you know, through a wall. 

O: Megatron retreats. 

S: Now we suddenly cut to an amusement park, complete with carnival music and Ferris Wheels!

O: And after some shots of various carnival sites we are greeted with Bumblebee on the teacups with Spike and Carly.

S: This is, like, super poorly drawn but it's functioning like the teacup ride so I guess that's what we're calling it.

O: We gotta call it something. 

S: Or I think- yeah. Huh. Bumblebee is confused about why the ride is supposed to be fun until Carly, you know, just opens him up and turns off his equilibrium circuits.

O: Why-why does Carly know how to do that? Should I be concerned? 

S: She's a super genius and she is not afraid to, you know, effectively do internal surgery on her robot friends.

O: Ain't that the truth. The three of them seem to have a very full day planned as after they leave at the amusement park they go stop by the airport to pick up Sparkplug and, Oh God, Sparkplug is in a suit!

S: He's in a waistcoat, even! Why was he in a suit? Is he their legal representative? Or, perhaps, is he a more traditional flyer? 

O: [Laughter] Most interesting man in the world? 

S: Let's go with both.

O: Why not, why not? 

S: Spike sees two military jets fly into a hangar and questions why they're at a commercial airport.

O: Completely missing that their paint jobs clearly identify them as Thundercracker and Thrust. 

S: Oh god, maybe- maybe those are weirdly common paint schemes in their universe.

O: That- that would be strange. That would definitely be strange. 

S: It would be. I don't know. So, you know, Spike and company follow the mysterious jets and surprise! Decepticons! How did they even get out of the airport?

O: There wasn't airport security in the eighties, Specs.

S: That’s true.

O: Certainly not like there is now, anyway, besides they have, you know, the best pass in the world: the “My Best Friend is a Giant Alien Robot Pass” since Bee was in the airport with them.

S: Yes, but how did he get through the doors? 

O: Pfft- he got into an arcade, I'm pretty sure an airports no problem. Um, Bee calls Prime for backup but they're still cleaning up their mess at the lab they were out previously and Prime calls headquarters, instead.

S: Oh, they're just playing phone tag. So Optimus reaches Wheeljack and deems it necessary to let the Dinobots out of their baby closet.

O: Grimlock’s not happy about the orders, but Wheeljack asked nicely in his best dad voice and at the airport Bee and the Dinobots are then hiding behind a big passenger jet. 

S: God, Bee is so tiny compared to the rest of them, cuz he really comes up to their knees-

O: [Laughter]

S: But I imagine that the airport staff is having a conniption.

O: [Laughter] I would hope. Bee points to the helpfully labeled “Hangar” in all caps and tells the Dinobots the Decepticons are in there.

S: The Dinobots smash their way into the hangar, and into a bickering Starscream and Megatron. How did the airport staff not realize that-

O: Their entire warehouse or um, ware- it's not a warehouse-

S: -Hangar.

O: -Hangar was being used by evil robots? Who the fuck knows. 

S: Cuz, I mean, oh god, maybe someone was paying rent? 

O: I mean- Soundwave! Soundwave clearly set this up and was like- if we're paying rent, they won't bother us. I wouldn't blame him if that was the conclusion you reached.

S: Same!

O: [Laughter] So Slag proceeds to completely melt one of Starscream’s null-rays. 

S: No one's having a good day!

O: No one is having a good day.

S: Except maybe the Dinobots.

O: They get to destroy things.

S: Yeah. Outside Sludge saves Bumblebee by kicking Blitzwing into a wall.

O: Inside the hangar it gets Looney Tunes up in here with Snarl knocking over some barrels and the Seekers all falling on their faces.

S: That’s super Looney Tunes.

O: It's gonna get more Looney Tunes here in a moment.

S: Yeah. He also hits Rumble into Megatron and then they both fall backwards onto the computer console.

O: And Megatron just tosses Rumble off screen immediately afterwards.

S: I feel if I keep saying no one's having a good day we're just gonna be repeating that a lot so I'm gonna stop. 

O: [Laughter] 

S: Just take it as a given. Thundercracker and Thrust are taken out by Swoop and crash into the hangar, causing it to explode. And then Megatron pulls himself out of the wreckage. and orders an attack.

O: I mean, none of them are having a good day. Megatron's really not having a good day. 

S: Yeah. they’re- None of them are having a good day. At all.

O: The Dinobots have zero trouble with taking out the remaining four Decepticons by themselves because they’re the fucking Dinobots.

S: Yep, and Megatron ends up face-planting onto the floor of the airport terminal after Grimlock picks him up in his, you know, t-rex mouth and tosses him.

O: I mean, seriously, let's break this down: We've got the fusion cannon getting stolen, getting hit by Rumble, a building collapsing on him, and then getting picked up by a giant fucking t-rex! I'm just saying, that's a lot of things to pack into one day! 

S: Well, a few hours.

O: [Laughter] Yeah! Yes! It’s not even been a huge, long length of time. So he lands right in front of Spike and company and then, in the next shot, they're all outside. So did they gain teleporting powers? 

S: Maybe they just walked out the hole?

O: Past the passed out Megatron? That seems like a poor option, even if he is passed out.

S: I don't think some of them have very good survival instincts, ok.

O: [Laughter] Boy, do they not. The Dinobots returned to robot mode and Megatron and Skywarp shoot the passenger jets behind them, causing a massive explosion and sending all the Dinobots flying. 

S: I mean, that is a smart choice considering that, if they were entirely fueled up planes they'd have a hell of a lot of-

O: Fuel? Explosive fuel? Yeah.

S: Yeah. Megatron proclaims victory and not checking that the Dinobots are dead at all. 

O: Inferno, Hoist, and Red Alert show up and Hoist begins moving the Dinobots back to base.

S: By putting them into, like, one of the ruined planes and they tow it.

O: Right. I totally forgot about that.

S: It's- it seems like a really awkward way to transport your wounded.

O: [Laughter] It does, but they are so huge that I kind of understand it. So back in the Ark, Wheeljack, Ratchet, and Hoist are all trying to put the Dinobots back together.

S: And then they all wax poetic about mix- missing Cybertron and complain about the primitive tools they have to use.

O: Didn’t they- Didn’t you make them with those tools, Ratch? 

S: Yeah. Back at the airport, Powerglide is literally shitting bricks while him and Ironhide try to help repair the damage. Unfortunately, they are very bad.

O: It's like the worst building, ever. Grapple destroys it putting the roof on.

S: Did they even put a door in there? 

O: It really didn't look like it. It's funnier because Optimus seems like he's trying to direct Grapple and I want you to please envision Ro- Ron Swanson saying, “I know more than you,” for his response.

S: Yeah. Elsewhere, the Decepticons are all flying in the air before they all suddenly fall to the ground and Rumble and Ravage are both acting super strange. Ravage is running around and Rumble seemingly is not able to control himself and keeps punching Megatron.

O: Megs just sort of bats him away. I think this is, like, time number 4 getting tossed for poor Rumble this episode?

S: Yeah, poor guy’s just kind of a hacky sack. 

O: Little bit. You’re too tiny Rumble, we’re sorry. 

S: Megatron vows to figure out what the fuck is going on before we jet back over to the Ark. 

O: Wheeljack and Ratchet are putting the finishing touches on the Dinobots’ repairs.

S: Optimus calls the Ark and orders the Dinobots to stop the Decepticons who are running amok again. 

O: The Dinobots refuse after getting, you know, exploded last time and tell Optimus the kid-friendly equivalent to fuck off and then walk out.

S: And then Wheeljack and Ratchet have to watch their babies walk away.

O: So sad. The Decepticons are trying to gather Energon from a power plant in order to fix the whole, you know, falling out of the sky thing. 

S: The Autobots arrive and transform, all except for Jazz who seems to be stuck in car mode. And then Ironhide attempts some percussive maintenance and kicks him.

O: Which does, indeed, work and Jazz is able to transform the rest of the way. 

S: Megatron loses his ability to form words mid-sentence.

O: Starscream immediately proclaims himself the leader of the Decepticons before nose-diving right into a pile of Energon cubes. You know, exactly what you would expect to happen. [Laughter]

S: Ahh, things just start to go wrong. Ironhide’s-

O: Very wrong for everyone.

S: Yep, Ironhide’s Swiss Army knife powers have backfired incredibly badly, as this entire body freezes up when he goes to shoot Starscream with liquid nitrogen. 

O: Mirage thinks he has turned invisible but- but then gets beaned by Thundercracker when tried to attack him because he has not, in fact, turned invisible. 

S: Yep. Ravage successfully attacks Optimus before involuntarily transforming into tape mode.

O:  And Optimus just picks up the tape and dumps it into a barrel and I'm like, “You bastard.” 

S: Jazz proceeds to lose his groove and then Blitzwing falls into a hole of his own making. Starscream goads Megatron into action.

O: To which he responds, “If only to spite you!” Which if that doesn't summarize their entire relationship, I don't know what does.

S: True. Starscream takes aim at Optimus with Megatron in gun mode but Megatron's uh, performance leaves quite a lot to be desired.

O: Megatron then orders a retreat but the Cons are unable to fly and instead run away- on foot.

S: Back at the base, the same symptoms that are- the same- condition that seems to be affecting the Cons is also, apparently, affecting the Autobots. They have the same sort of symptoms and- yeah.

O: Optimus can barely stand.

S: And then he collapses into a pose that makes him resemble a giant toddler. It's- not very dignified.

O: No, no it is not. But fear not! Perceptor has it all figured out because, you know, Perceptor is the only Autobot that can do his damn job around here. 

S: Yeah, none of them have been eating their- well, none of them have been eating their leafy greens, effectively.

O: Or, in other words, they're missing an element that is necessary for their function.

S: Said element, of course, can only be found on Cybertron.

O: All the Autobots look worse for wear from all this but Jazz in particular is having a bad time with his bottom half stuck in car mode.

S: And, possibly, upside down. 

O: I- yeah, I can't remember and Powerglide is even missing his head. 

S: Oh dear. Yeah, cuz it's, like, not connected to his body. A headless airman, if you will? Carly and Spike run in and tell Optimus that Shockwave is sending a shipment of the missing element, Cybertonium, to earth.

O: The Autobots are, unfortunately, not in any position to do anything with this information for obvious reasons.

S: But Carly realizes that the Dinobots are still functioning normally, as they were built on Earth. And they don't include-

O: Don't require this to keep functioning, essentially.

S: Yeah, they just weren't constructed with it at all.

O: Yeah.

S: So they use Teletraan 1 to track the Dinobots down and they leave in Carly's car. 

O: Sparkplug jokes about not being sure he remembers how to drive it's been so long since he's had to drive, because they've been with the Autobots for however long.

S: Yeah, so they get there and Grimlock doesn't want to help at first, but thankfully Swoop manages to keep three humans from getting crushed. 

O: He picks up Carly's entire car.

S: That sounds about right.

O: And with a little persuasion the big ol t-rex does ultimately agree to help.

S: The Dinobots arrive at the space bridge and manage to make it past the Constructicons and actually- accidentally end up on Cybertron. I'm kind of wondering if the Constructicons have the same element issue or if they don't.

O: Well, if they showed up later than they presumably haven't been missing it for the past million years. Maybe that's why they were guarding the space bridge.

S: That's true.

O: We're, of course, not told any of this, so I have no idea.

S: And, actually, I'm wondering about the Insecticons, too. But that's neither here or near- neither here nor there, because they are Sirs Not Appearing in this Episode.

O: Yeah, they may not even know and Decepticons maybe didn't even call them. On the receiving end of the Dinobots, poor Shockwave is shocked to get a triceratops suddenly to the face.

S: Sparkplug manages to figure out that the Dinobots are on Cybertron but Grimlock refuses to return to Earth.

O: Carly volunteers to go to Cybertron since the Dinobots aren't in any mood to help. Spike says Optimus will never agree to something so dangerous.

S: Oh, I mean, it's not like Optimus can stop them.

O: In fact, he just sort of falls on his face when he tries. 

S: Yeah. Before they head out, Sparkplug gifts Spike a really lame looking communicator that sort of sticks to his thumb like a band-aid. 

O: Well, Wheeljack isn't exactly up to par right now so, hmm. 

S: Fair. Carly drives her car through Devastator’s legs to get to the space bridge like the goddamn badass she is.

O: And the episode ends with Shockwaves shooting the space bridge door as it opens - to which, join us next time for Desertion of the Dinobots, Part Two.

S: The Dinobots have arrived on Cybertron and they're ready to paint the planet red!

O: And I believe we have some fanfic for today.

S: All right, we have two pieces of fanfiction. We have “Walking with Dinobots” by BlushLouise- BlushLouise?

O: One of those.

S: Yeah. It's in the G1 Cartoon continuity. It's rated G, it's gen, there are no pairings and the characters are the Dinobots and Optimus Prime. So, in summary, “The humans have this show. It's called Walking with Dinosaurs. Until the Dinobots take an interest, that is. Or the many ways a Dinobot can sneak away to join the circus.” And that was just really cute. It’s been a while since I read it but really cute. And so our theme on that is “Dinobots getting to go around and do stuff,” I think.

O: Getting out and about, I believe. 

S: Ah, getting out and about, thank you. And then our second fanfic recommendation is “Wayward” by Im_The_Doctor (Bofur1). It's G1 Cartoon, it's rated G, it's gen, no pairings, and our characters are Wheeljack, Dinobots, and [Chip] Chase. And in summary, “As the Autobots recover from their Cybertonium depletion and readjust to working with the Dinobots (again), only one mech in particular seems to be healing poorly- not just physically but emotionally. Naturally that catches some attention.

S: And again- Dinobots.

O: And both of these are one shots.

S: Yeah, they’re both one shots and the second one I'd originally picked for the second episode but I think it also works pretty well here.

O: And our fan artist for today is Charlotte Cha [Sha]? Cha? Cha [Sha]. They seem to primarily do IDW. They probably have a bit more of- a bit more things than that but that's what I’ve primarily seen they have a ton of to Dratchet stuff. Uh, they've got a zine for their Young!Ratchet/Vet!Drift AU, and I think it's super cute. Today we've linked to that zine. 

S: Yep, I have that downloaded somewhere it's really cute. 

O: Another cuddly Dratchet fanart- of Drift and Ratchet just cuddling. It's very cute. And Tailgate being a complete and total dumbass and Cyclonus being, like, ‘Oh no, I have to protect this tiny idiot.’ It is fantastic. A lot of their stuff I've seen has been more sketchy and they do do other fan art that isn't Transformers related. We will be able to link to their Instagram. They frequently also go by the username VoyVoy or Voyahora, I think, and then their Tumblr is like PrimeADV, so I have no idea and just went with what they have listed I think on their Twitter as the real name so. But I do recommend their stuff! It's super cute and we will be posting links. 

S: Mm-hmm. And that about wraps it up for us today.  Remember to check us out on Tumblr or Pillowfort as Afterspark-Podcast for any additional information, show notes, or links we may have mentioned.  You can also find us on Facebook and Twitter at AftersparkPod (all one word) and various other locations by searching for Afterspark Podcast such as AO3, iTunes, Spotify, and Youtube, just to name a few.  And feel free to send us questions on Tumblr, Youtube, or AO3!  Till next time, I'm Specs.

O: And I’m Owls.

S: Toodles.

[Outro Music]

[shikai-the-storyteller]

CYBERVERSE WATCH!!!!!!! (Season 3 Episodes 1-4)

Episode 1

Lord have mercy on my soul IM TRYING TO CALM MYSELF DOWN ENOUGH TO WATCH THIS BUT IM TOO FRICKIN HYPED

Ok here are the things I know / were spoiled to me going in:

Gal Skywarp (can I get a Hell Yeah)

WHIRL (MY BOY!!!!!!!!!!!)

Quintessons (IM SO FRICKIN PUMPED TO SEE THEM)

“Transformation. Everything in the universe transforms. Sometimes, it is for the better. Sometimes, it is not.” *HAS TO PAUSE VIDEO FOR A MINUTE TO SOAK IN OPTIMUS’ WORDS*

“For this, I blame myself” OP when do you NOT blame yourself I mean SERIOUSLY DUDE....I GET WHY YOU FEEL BAD BUT YOU GOTTA STOP LITERALLY SHOULDERING THE WEIGHT OF THE WORLD’S ISSUES

OHHHHHHH OH??????????????? OH???????? MEGATRON AND OPTIMUS BACK TO BACK AGAINST QUINTESSON??? BLACK ARMOR RODDY?????????????????????

EYYY SKYFIRE

I frickin scream EVERY time I see a bot I recognize

“There seems to be no Decepticon presence on Cybertron” THATS NOT SHADY AT ALL....did the Quints get them or are they hiding (probably the latter)

AW BEE.....don’t be so down on things it’ll be ok bud

CHROMIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

PERCY OMG HE”S SPEAKING (AND HE”S NOT TEXT TO SPEECH)

“Now you’ll be responsible for the deactivation of all the autobots” PERCY PLEASE SHE WAS TRYING TO SAVE YOUR LIFE

“Thanks a lot Perceptor” LMAO NICE

“Please do” PERCY COME ON NOW

HIS GLASSES??????????????????????????????? THEY JUST CAME OFF

PERCY OH MY GOSH someone please get this boy to a medic

“I have other means of perception” DANG CYBERVERSE PERCY IS SO COOL

I like the way Percy talks, it’s somewhat...stilted? And automatic? I’ll find better words to describe that later but it suits him. Really dig the voice choices for Cyberverse

PERCY NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE LET HIS SURVIVAL STAT EXTEND TO THE CYBERVERSE UNIVERSE

lmao I thought she was gonna say “Gotta lose these cops” me 2 Chromia

LASERBEAK!!!!! LASERBEAK BABY!!!!! I KNEW YOU WERE IN CYBERVERSE I KNEW I SAW YOU IN THE BACKGROUND ONCE!!!!

SHE PUNCHED A BIRD

OH SHOOT SOUNDWAVE’S GONNA KILL HER

BACKPACK ALL SPARK

Gosh Hot Rod you’re such a frickin jock I love you

FRICKIN

DRIFT

THERE”S SO MUCH TO FRICKIN UNPACK IN THAT SEQUENCE

DRIFT TALKED!!! AND THEN CAME OFF SOUNDING TOTALLY CREEPY LMAO

I LOVE RODDY DIPPING RIGHT OUTTA THERE BYE BUD

SOUNDWAVE!!!! BABY!!!!!!

They’re gonna shoot that outta the sky aren’t they OH NO THAT”S SO MUCH WORSE

Gosh I cANT GET OVER THE FACT THAT DRIFT SPOKE AND RODDY AWKWARDLY FINGERGUNNED OUTTA THERE THAT’S HILARIOUS 

Drift: How do I invite Roddy to hang out and be my friend. Wait I know, I’ll say it in the most threatening way possible. Yes, he’ll absolutely want to be my friend now. :)

Episode 2

Megatron: Yes.... Me: *BEAST WARS FLASHBACK*

“SHOCKWAVE! You finally did something right!”  Shockwave: >:/

SYWARP!!! SKYWARP??? SKYWARP!!!!!!!

Aren’t they worried by blowing up the ship they blew up the AllSpark

“WHO DARES? WE JUST FINISHED REMODELING THIS PLACE”

LET TELETRAN SWEAR!!!!!!

OH NO OPTIMUS IS GIVING HOT ROD THE LEADERSHIP SPEECH, IM WORRIED....

Like on the one hand I wanna see my boy taking charge but on the other PLEASE DONT KILL OPTIMUS

The shoulder touch.... :’) Papa Optimus is the best

Every time Megatron calls Optimus “Old friend” I cry

HELL YEAH AUTOBOTS ROLL OUT--oh they didn’t transform lmao that’s still cool

I’m so glad ShadowStriker is the leader of some of the Decepticon forces that’s cool

PROWL PUNCHED A CAR HELL YEAH

GET THEM WINDBLADE aw man I feel bad every time a seeker explodes, rest in pieces

ARCEE RIDING GRIMLOCK IS THE COOLEST THING EVER

OMG STRIKA

KUP?!??!!??! 

WHIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!>?!??!!?!?!?! OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH OH MY GOSH WHIRL!?!?!?!?!?

WHIRL COME BACK I LOVE YOU

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!

RATCHET!!!! SMARTYPANTS HE”S SO CUTE

SOUNDWAVE I LOVE YOU BUT PLEASE GIVE RATCHET A BREAK

BEE!!! SAVE YOUR MEDIC YOU GUYS ONLY HAVE ONE

omg Bee and Hot Rod fighting is so good

IS THAT IRONHIDE????

LMAO LASERBEAK JUST FLIES OFF WITH -- AHHH WHIRL!!! WHIRL SPOKE!!!! MY BABY BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OH NO THEY SHOT PROWL IN THE BOOB

RIGHT IN THE TIDDY

I love that Shockwave is watching this all go down like “Whatever

UH WHATS THAT NOISE 

PREDACON??????

Episode 3

IM LEGIT HAVING TO TAKE BREAKS BETWEEN EPISODES MY HEART CANT TAKE THIS

IM JUST SMILING SO MUCH!!!!!! WHIRL!!!!!!!! DRIFT / DEADLOCK!!!!!!! KUP!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I LOVE THE CYBERVERSE CREW

I totally thought Megatron was gonna say “I won’t, but THEY will!” but the episode intro cut him off so it just sounds like he confidently said “You’re right! I can’t beat you!” lmao

SCRAPLETS...SOMEONE GET SOME SPRAY PLEASE

OH GOSH PLEASE DONT REMIND ME OF THAT HORRIFYING SCRAPLET SCENE IN S2

oh wow Optimus is traumatized by that (I MEAN, THAT MAKES SENSE BUT WE ACTUALLY GET TO SEE IT WHICH IS NEW) poor dude, someone give this guy a vacation

LESBIAN MIND MELD

Chromia please don’t make Percy blow out his eyes again

“Team Hot Rod? Is that us?” YOU GUYS ARE SO PRECIOUS IT ACTUALLY HURTS

DRIFT!!! YO DRIFT!!!!!!! HIS EYES ARE BLUE RN

oh my gosh please don’t tell me he’s gonna follow Hot R--YEAH HE’S FOLLOWING HIM LMAO

Drift: Oh!! There goes my best buddy! I should follow him! :) Hot Rod: GO FASTER GUYS GO FASTER

IT”S A FRICKIN SHOCKWAVE ARMY

What’s stopping Shockwave from just overthrowing Megatron I MEAN REALLY

Lmao Hot Rod is so cute, he’s like “oh the floor’s sinking? Down we go I guess”

Man it’s so exciting to see the environment of Cybertron and how the planet looks, LIKE THIS IS THE STUFF I LIVE AND DIE FOR, THANK YOU CREW

DRIFT WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!!!!!!!!!

“Why the surprise? No one ever leaves the Decepticons” I LITERALLY GASPED OUT LOUD IN HORROR

DRIFT YOU CANT DO THAT!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!! BAD BOT!!!!!!

PLEASE SAY SIKE

HIS EYES CHANGED BACK TO RED JUST TO HAMMER THAT HOME JEEZ

“Hail this” OH MY GOSH RODDY

GOSH THAT MAKES ME SO SAD....DRIFT WHY!!!!!!!!

HOT ROD LOOKS SO FRICKIN COOL THOUGH OH MY GOSH

THIS FIGHT SCENE IS SO AWESOME MORE OF THIS PLEASE

NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I JUST GASPED AGAIN IN HORROR AND PAIN, NO!!!!!! RODIMUS NO!!!!!!!! DRIFT HOW COULD YOU!!!!!!!!!!

THIS IS SO DARK OH MY GOSH nO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LIKE OBVIOUSLY HE”S NOT DEAD BECAUSE HE HAD BLACK ARMOR IN THE SERIES OPENING BUT IF I DIDNT KNOW THAT ID BE FRICKIN SOBBING ON THE FLOOR FOR THE REST OF THE EVENING

Jeez team frat boys is not doing so hot

NICE ONE WINDBLADE

“OHO, I HAVE SOME IDEAS” WHEELJACK BUDDY...

TELETRAN NO!!!

WINDBLADE KICK HIS BUT

CYBERVERSE STOP PLAYING WITH MY HEART LIKE THIS!!!!!!!

Episode 4

INSECTICONS??????

lmao oh Bee

Man I love Wheeljack’s VA

“THIS is for Slipstream!” OH SHOOT YOU GO WINDBLADE

YOU BOTTLED UP UNSPACE?????????

“We got ‘em. Got ‘em good!” PLEASE STOP MEMEING (jk)

SHOCKWAVE OH NO

OH SHOOT RIGHT IN SHOCKWAVE’S CANNON

ARCEE IS SO FRICKIN COOL

Wait if the Allspark fixes things then it might bring Roddy / Drift back to life

OPTIMUS’ POWER WALK IS SO FRICKIN HOT

HE JUST SUPLEXES A SHARK AND SOUNDWAVE AND MEGATRON’S LIKE “OH NO THAT WAS KINDA HOT???”

BABY NO DONT SELF DESTRUCT

OH SHOOT WHAT

THAT’S SO MUCH WORSE

imagine ur soul is so corrupted you destroy heaven that’s essentially what’s happening here

CHEETOR NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Thank you for being my friend, Bumblebee” IM SOBBING INTO MY HANDS

“Wherever Bumblebee goes on Cybertron, Cheetor goes with him” SOBS!!!!!!!!!!!

Cybertron is gold! :O

LMAO GOT HIM GOOD OPTIMUS

“Don’t mind the shrieks in the background”

“It is our duty to make sure it Transforms for the better” wahh

[ckret2]

If you had the chance to write a free for all continuity for transformers what would you write? I think writers are allowed to write with whatever character too. Any pairings you’d be interested in exploring?

I’m gonna give you two ideas.

Number one:

What I kind of want to do is rewrite Energon.

It’s a series that had a whole lot of potential. You start the story with the war having been over for ten years, with the Autobots in charge, and the surviving Decepticons uneasily working alongside the victors. Unicron is dead and floating out in space—but might not totally be. The prequel series, Armada, was all about the Autobots’ and Decepticons’s fight to control and/or “liberate” (depending on how benevolently you interpret the Autobots’ actions) a subrace of tiny Cybertronians who easily serve as weapons, and who, it turns out, are also thousands of tiny Unicron-spawn; what’s their position like ten years on, with the side fighting to liberate them in charge but the knowledge that they’re offshoots of the world-eater out there? Energon barely touches on it.

One of the early antagonists is a Quintesson trying to resurrect various powerful dead Decepticons to further help him resurrect Unicron; when he wakes up Megatron, Megatron ousts him as main antagonist, after which he very slowly becomes a protagonist, and we find out that his homeworld was devoured by Unicron and he’s looking for a way to make Unicron upchuck it. That’s great! That’s a compelling storyline and could be made even tighter!

In Armada, Starscream sacrifices himself in a hopeless attack on Unicron in order to provoke Unicron to counterattack solely to prove to Megatron just what a massive destructive power Unicron is, forcing Megatron to realize that he has to set aside his fight with Optimus to address Unicron. In Energon, he’s a memoryless ghost the Quint finds wandering Unicron and uses as a minion, only for Megatron to seize control of him and brainwash him into loyalty, where he remains for the series. This is after the series with the Starscream who revolted against Megatron for truly noble reasons, to attempt to better the Decepticons, spent a stint as an Autobot before returning to the Cons, and died a hero. So much more could have been done with a ghost of Starscream that started slowly remembering his past life while Megatron struggled to suppress his memories—or, a Megatron ambivalent about psychologically beating this shade of Starscream back into place, or acknowledging the hero he became and the important lesson he taught Megatron.

There’s a plot arc where an Autobot is half-brainwashed by Megatron, and ultimately sacrifices himself to avoid being forced to turn on the Autobots—which is stupendous! He’s uh resurrected in a couple of episodes though. Why not make that sacrifice worth something? Why not make him wooed to the Decepticons for more compelling reasons than brainwashing? Or: why not dig deeper into the brainwashing plot, have him realize that on some level he’s truly deeply beginning to agree with the Decepticons, and even though he knows that he only agrees because he was reprogrammed to believe he still finds the rhetoric compelling? Make him fight with himself!

One of the Decepticons from Armada gleefully returned to the Decepticons as soon as Megatron shows up; but his best friend struggles between rejoining Megatron or staying with the Autobots in the peaceful post-war life he’s found. Eventually he throws in his lot with Megatron… dies in the process, and is casually revived as a completely loyal Decepticon with a rather new personality. Beginning to catch a pattern, here?

There were so many compelling storylines in Energon—a morally gray but ultimately sympathetic Quintesson, multiple characters grappling with their loyalties and with the fallout of the recently-ended war, a story that starts with Unicron rather than ending with him, more I didn’t mention like Cybertron/Earth politics—but most of the most fascinating storylines were truncated with abrupt kill-offs and next-episode resurrections that wiped away all complexity, ambiguity, and internal strife, or else sudden snap decisions that instantly resolved what could have been interesting character strife; and meanwhile the main plot dragged on twice as long as it needed to, reaching two or three events that could have been a satisfying climax to the ongoing plot but then lumbering on to another new unrelated plot twist. I’d love to dig my hands into Energon to tighten its main story, expand its best subplots, and make something more coherent out of its best themes.

If I were to write a totally new storyline, though?

Number two:

Okay first off it would be Decepticon centric so jot that down. A fully Decepticon-centric storyline might be cool to do as, like, a paired series, with somebody else writing the Autobot line and me writing the Decepticon line, showing the same events from both sides so that each story is complete on its own and you don’t need to read/watch the other, but if you do it’s practically a whole new story. It’d mean a lot of Teamwork and Coordinating but I’ve got years of RP experience under my belt doing just that, and what would this be but a two-person RP where we’re each responsible for playing a whole faction and coordinating a storyline accordingly?

The grody machinations of Decepticon leadership inner politics could certainly run an entire storyline all on its own. As it is, usually when we look in on Decepticon politics, it mainly ends up being brief interludes that are mainly important in the way that they affect the Autobots. But let’s just have nothing but politics between awful people! Awful people who have their own compelling complexities and moments where you can sympathize with them, without stopping them from being awful! Maybe redeem one or two. We’ll see what feels natural.

Or, if I can grant myself a token Autobot, and REALLY make this a dream story: give me a Prowl who’s been captured by the Decepticons. I’ve got a little AU I’ve never done anything with where the Decepticons capture Prowl, try to torture him for information, and instead he flips a little self-destruct switch in his mind that renders him nonverbal (possibly unable to write as well—possibly he’d just pretend so), and thus unable to spill any secrets even if he wanted to. The Decepticons assume that he fried his processor, not just his ability to speak, and keep him around as a potent hostage but put laxer and laxer holds on him the less they think he’s a danger, to the point where soon he’s wandering the base as long as he’s like, wired with a killswitch so he can’t go outside alone or something.

So our viewpoint character is Prowl, wandering around with Decepticon High Command as the audience’s eye into their drama, learning about the intricate politics and interrelationships between the leaders and the followers they keep closest just by observing; and all the while seeking a way to escape them, to forward all his intel to the Autobots, or to sabotage the Decepticons from the inside; without being able to communicate, and all while knowing that he’s only allowed this freedom and safety as long as the Decepticons think 1) he’s harmless, and 2) the Autobots are going to desperately want him safe regardless. The story, therefore, progresses on two levels: we’ve got both that wider expanse of Decepticon politics—which we only ever glimpse parts of, limited to Prowl’s POV, learning more about it at the same time he does—and the far narrower story of Prowl’s attempts to Save Himself And/Or Win The War weaving through the Decepticon political games.

Ships, I’m not sure about off the top of my head. Poly Constructicons would be a delight. And I like the idea of a Con falling for Prowl just by paying enough attention to realize that the fact that he can’t talk out loud doesn’t mean he isn’t still the very sharp strategist he’s always been, and perhaps ultimately getting swayed into helping him and, by extension, the Autobots. One of the Waves would be my top candidate for that. They seem the most likely Decepticons to recognize that silent doesn’t necessarily mean stupid and take a closer look; and “cool-headed logical pragmatist who has a passionate need to Protect but unlike the average Autobot can’t be lured into doing something stupid to save one that would endanger ten” would probably appeal to either of them: Beyond that: anything that hasn’t been done before, I like the thought of taking what was once a crack ship and justifying it in such a way it makes other people see it too. Need at least two ships with absolutely zero canon basis.

[thanksjro]

Dark Cybertron Chapter 7: Simon Furman and His Lack of a Relationship with the Singular They

The Lost Light is still being attacked by Ammonites, like it has been for the last few issues. Hound’s taken over as acting field commander and is calling all the shots. Chromedome uses his stupid beefy arms to punch things. Trailcutter is screaming. Swerve’s got his My First Blaster™ strapped to the top of his alt, and saves Crosscut.

Crosscut is our toy tie-in character for this issue. He’s a senator, and drafts play scripts. Arguably one of the more interesting tie-in guys, at least in theory. In practice, all he’s doing is forgetting Swerve’s name, which isn’t going to help the guy with his through-the-floor self esteem.

Crosscut points out that Swerve’s communicator is flashing, and while he’s checking his voicemail, all the Ammonites seemingly vanish… at least, until the gang realizes that they’re instead heading for Metroplex.

Inside, it would appear that the Rod Pod Squad aren’t actually dead, though their ride is probably toast. Before everything went to hell, a wall slammed down from the ceiling, protecting everyone from being utterly destroyed. Skids has figured out what all the arrow graffiti is about, earning himself a BOMP from Getaway. Looks like the internal structure of Metroplex has been shifting, and that’s why they got the runaround last issue. Also, Whirl’s gone missing, but we don’t have time to worry about that, because Swerve just called back with some bad news: the admium flakes they saw earlier mean that Metroplex has an alchemical virus.

Don’t you look at me like that, I’m getting to the explanation.

Alchemical viruses turn the metal of the body into admium, a rare, incredibly soft metal that will break down very easily and also kill you. It’s pretty bad to have. Also, contagious. Fellas better get outta there, posthaste.

The Ammonites are also storming Metroplex, so that’s an additional issue. God, it just never stops, does it?

Over in the Dead Universe-

Is

Is that a fortress of evil in the shape of Nova Prime’s head?

Is that a goddamned fortress-

Anyway, the center of Nova Prime’s universe is Kup, who was the guy who got oh-so-dramatically revealed at the end of the last issue. Unfortunately, Orion Pax also considers Kup to be very near and dear to his heart, and the whole “being turned into a space bridge” thing is going to be an issue.

This is the weirdest love triangle I’ve ever seen.

How the hell did Kup even get here? Well, in order to know that, you’ve have to had read Infestation, the bullshit zombie crossover comic miniseries that ran in 2011.

But I’m not going to do that.

Because I don’t want to.

After a bit of showboating, Nova Prime orders Nightbeat to take Team -Imus to their cell.

Over on Cybertron, Shockwave is getting real sick of Galvatron’s shit, but Galvatron is too busy posing dramatically to notice. Waspinator, Metalhawk, and Dreadwing float in the air. I’m not sure what they’re up to, but I’m sure it’s important. Jhiaxus shows up with a gaggle of goons, one of which seems to have forgotten his face in the jar by the door.

Galvatron gets shamed for tearing Megatron in half, since that sort of broke the space bridge in his torso, but he’s too busy being classist to care. Waspinator floats in the background. What are you doing back there, pal?

Shockwave orders Waspinator to carry Megatron to his quarters, but Galvatron’s decided that he’s going to be an asshole about everything today, even when he’s being helpful.

…Okay, Boomer.

Waspinator still ends up hauling Megatron’s ass away, and Shockwave and Jhiaxus have a little chat.

Back in the dead universe, Team -Imus are in their cell, as Nightbeat double-checks the locks or some shit, I dunno. They’re gonna get their sparks ripped out later in the day, so that the space bridge Kup’s got running in his torso finally has enough juice to actually friggin’ work.

Then Rodimus flashes his mystery hand at Nightbeat and makes him fall down. In order for the whole brainwashing thing to work, Nightbeat’s true nature had to be suppressed; however, whenever Rodimus shows off his mystery hand, it makes his brain kickstart back on, messing up the brainwashing.

Well, you know what, Cyclonus? That’s not my fucking fault. Blame Roberts and Barber. I certainly do.

ORION PLEASE.

We finally get a look at what Rodimus’ hand mystery is, and if you read Eugenesis, you might know where this is going. It would seem Nightbeat has not- which is for the best, really, given what happens to him in it- but he’s still a pretty smart cookie and can suss it out through the power of deductive reasoning. Here’s what he’s working with:

After a moment’s deliberation, he asks Rodimus, who he knows to be the captain of a ship, how many folks are riding around in the space yacht. Rodimus tells him 190, and shows off that he’s got his lipgloss on, and it would seem that Nightbeat’s a free man again. He lets everyone out of the cell, and they gear up to go pick up Kup. Orion Pax is confused as to what the hell just happened here, and Rodimus promises to explain why he’s carved a division problem into his palm once they aren’t in immediate danger.

Back on Cybertron, Galvatron and Waspinator are dragging Megatron’s halves towards Shockwave’s quarters, when Bumblebee pops out of nowhere with a gun and a mouth full of swears. He’s here for Megatron, and he’s not taking “no” for an answer. Galvatron thinks that this is super fucking funny, and tosses Megatron like an empty soda can into the wall so he can squash a bug.

It looks pretty grim for ol’ Bumblebee, but suddenly Galvatron realizes he left the oven on that Megatron’s gone missing.

Oh, there he is!

Megatron blasts Galvatron in the torso, then- in a surprisingly polite manner, at least for him- tells Bumblebee to grab his legs so they can get out of here. As the two of them traverse the burned-out husk that is Cybertron, Megatron decides to be a complete bastard, as he smiles at the idea of Starscream suffering. Like, dude, I know he kept you in weird hamster ball jail and spouted soliloquies in your general direction every single day you were there, but folks are dying right now.

Speaking of Starscream, he’s having a moment, as he sits on his knees and stares at the sky in abject horror while the world burns around him. Scoop comes by to yell at him for being a harbinger of death, and generally being a less than stellar leader, and Starscream halfway calls himself a dumpster fire.

Back inside Metroplex, the Rod Pod Squad are fortifying their defenses against the Ammonites, even though they really need to be getting the hell out of there before they get turned into talcum powder through the power of alchemy. Whirl shows back up, the Ammonite hanger-on in his grasp, and we get the skinny on why the hell the Ammonites are involved with this whole debacle anyway.

The answer is Shockwave.

The answer is always Shockwave.

Then the little dude explodes. It’s fine, they do that sometimes.

Before he went kablooey, little dude uttered the phrase, “if the dead are not enough.” We’ll get to what all that’s about later. Right now there are far more important things going on.

LIKE MOTHERFUCKING LADY ROBOTS.

But why is this such a big deal? Why is it that non-male coded robots who aren’t Arcee haven’t been seen up until this point? What’s up with that, huh?

Well, in order to understand IDW’s complicated relationship with gender, we’re going to have to do some digging into the history of Transformers as a franchise.

We’re going to have to talk about Simon Furman.

We're going to have to talk about Prime's Rib.

And we’re going to have to talk about Spotlight: Arcee.

Simon Furman wrote a lot of Transformers. You cannot get away from Simon Furman, because the man is so ingrained in the franchise. He was there for Marvel UK, he was there for the back half of Marvel US, he wrote for several other publication runs of Transformers, he worked on the Earth Wars mobile game-

-and, of course, IDW publishing.

Because Furman is so very well established and known in the industry, he gets the benefit of not being questioned on a lot of the calls he makes.

Which is a problem, because the man is a massive misogynist.

In 1989, Marvel UK #234 came out, containing the story entitled “Prime’s Rib!” in which the Autobots built Arcee in order to appease a group of strawmen feminists. Of course, one female Transformer isn’t enough for them, and they yell at poor Optimus Prime for trying his best. This is the point where Hot Rod is used as a writer avatar to try to smooth things over with the reader, because you see, the Transformers don’t even know what sexual dimorphism and gender identity even is, so of course they wouldn’t have female members of their race! Jazz is used for a breast joke. Arcee acts like a massive, stereotypical bitch the whole time, despite not having been written like that at all in the other issues. It’s a bad comic with hideous ideology leaking out of it, and I'm halfway sorry I read it, so I’ll just give you the essence of this nightmare.

Oh, those big, mean, scary feminists are bullying the robots for living their lives, huh Furman? Life is just so goddamned unfair when a woman exists in your fucking line of sight.

Furman has gone on record saying that he doesn’t see the point in including the concept of gender in a race of non-sexually reproducing robots. He sees them as “genderless.” Which, if that statement existed in a vacuum, I could perhaps see where he’s coming from.

But Simon Furman does not exist in a vacuum. He exists in a world where sexism exists, something that he’s willingly participated in.

Let me back up that little tidbit with a bit of a disclaimer: I’m not in any way an expert on gender. I didn’t study it in school, I’ve not read an obscene amount of pieces on the topic. I’m not even sure about it on a personal level.

Maybe some of y’all have noticed the whole other set of pronouns I slapped into the bio in the last month or so. It doesn’t really matter, 90% of people don’t read the FAQ/About, I know that, and then 95% of those people only read it once, and this has been a relatively new self-revelation.

BUT ANYWAY.

Let’s be… fair about this. 1989 was a while ago, a lot of research on the concept of gender has taken place, maybe he’s ch-

Oh, what’s that?

Misogyny?

Transphobia?

Transmisogyny?

Treating women as an aberration being forced on Transformers as a whole?

And the writing is clunky and overstuffed?

Well, that’s just fucking fantastic, Furman, thanks so much.

This was in 2008. Because Furman established that female Transformers weren’t something natural, but rather made, and forcibly at that, and nobody fucking smacked his little hands away from this terrible idea, AND nobody tried to fix it for years, there was a lack of gender diversity within IDW until 2014, with the release of Dark Cybertron Chapter 7. Because we waited six years to fix this nightmare, things couldn’t be done quite the way that Roberts had been hoping, in that he intended for our female robots to not have the whole… fembot build happening. IDW wanted them immediately clockable, because this was very clearly a problem that needed rectifying.

So, in short: because of boys’ club mentality and a lack of understanding of what gender means or why it’s important for roughly 50% of the world’s population to have representation in media, Nautica and Chromia are here now.

And despite the convoluted road they had to take, I love them very much.