#REALLY the moral of the story is to read up on pages that you would know the phrasing of in your native language lmfao

[essektheylyss]

New fun language learning activities: read Wikipedia pages for philosophical and political theories in your target language, just for kicks.

[feyd-meowtha]

Some thoughts on Dune, media literacy and the way we interact (and do not interact) with difficult topics in fiction....

Buddy, imma say this with kindness in my heart.... If this gets you 'tweaking' then you aren't gonna like the ending of Children of Dune...

On the media literacy note.... big sigh.

It is explicitly said that Feyd and Paul were meant to marry and have a child had Paul been born a girl - obviously the natural reaction is to consider what the nature/implications of that would have been. The source material is EXPLICITLY telling you that they were made for eachother, destined to be together. This is also the text EXPLICITLY telling you that this relationship would be an acceptable thing in this world. Therefore engaging with this concept is not at all a reach and is very much backed up by the source material. People are not getting this idea from nowhere.

(Also if that still offends you, they're not actually first cousins but cousins once removed and 2 seconds of thinking about the family tree would have made that obvious, not that it really matters at all in the context of this story, but it is a very easy feat of inductive reasoning)

The fact is that this is a story about ruling families and (as they almost always do) it involves a degree of incest. This is ESPECIALLY true in the world of Dune where these people are being selectively bred like show dogs to have certain genetic characteristics, I hope I do not have to patronise anyone by explaining how that works. Especially given as Reverend Mother Mohiam says this, oh, 10 pages into the first book:

People who haven't read the literature love to lecture people on literacy, funny.

So, in conclusion, if this is how you feel then, with love, Dune is not the story for you. The fact is that a degree of incest IS normalised in this universe and if you're inclined toward tedious moralising based on writers exploring difficult ideas in fiction then I'm honestly surprised you ended up here in the first place. Dune is a story that constantly presents the reader with difficult ideas and invites them to critique and analyse them for themselves, including the morality of the Bene Gesserit breeding programme. In Dune no character is morally pure, no ideology is beyond corruption and no path is free of ugly choices. As adults we can engage with these difficult topics as we wish.

*Sigh* A few years ago these people learned the term 'media literacy' and they've been insufferable ever since.

[neil-gaiman]

hi neil !

i have to write a short story for the final assignment worth 90% of my creative writing uni module, it has to be 4k words. i’ve been putting it off for months because 1) i’ve been depressed and can’t find the motivation to do anything, 2) im deathly scared of it being bad because 3) graduating my course counts on the grade i’ll get for it. writing and reading has been a huge motivator to not give up on a future for myself. i am basically terrified of writing and submitting it. all the ideas i have feel bad, or i can’t execute them, or it’s not what the marker would be looking for. i’ve had the deadline extended into summer but i just can’t bring myself to write anything. how do you make yourself write when it matters so much? when something big rests on its quality, and it scares you?

thank you so much :)

There was a colourist I knew who wanted more than anything to colour a comic book I was writing. I got him pages early to start colouring, talked to him about what we were trying to achieve. He was really smart and brilliant and I knew he'd do a great job. The editor was waiting for his work to come in.

He may have started. He may not. I don't know. All I know is he was so obsessed with it being perfect that he never sent the pages in. The person who wound up colouring the comic got the job because we were out of time and our first choice had never sent anything to the editor.

The moral I took from this is that any work, no matter how bad, is better than no work, no matter how brilliant.

I pass this along to you, in the hope that it helps. Divide 4000 by how many days you have to go, and then double that. That's what you have to write each day to get 4K written, with enough time to revise it thoroughly on the other side. Get anything down in the first half of the time. Make it brilliant in the second half of the time.

Good luck.

[etirabys]

meandering post about reading Orson Scott Card again

I've been offline starting at 9pm every day (except once. I was drunk at karaoke and asked for anons at 8:30pm) for six weeks, with the result that in befuddled boredom two nights ago I picked up Orson Scott Card's Songmaster from the house bookshelf.

I read Ender's Game and three sequels when I was a teen thought the books were mid. Since those are OSC's best works I assumed he had nothing more interesting to offer me and didn't try more of him for fifteen years, but Songmaster was compelling enough that I immediately afterwards picked up The Memory of Earth, the first book of a pentalogy.

TMoE is extremely my jam: after humanity blows itself up on Earth, AIs monitor thriving human civilizations in the planets that survivors managed to escape to, and suppress any tech that enables large scale violence by exerting low key mind control via satellites. But forty million years pass, many of the satellites break down, and the AI needs help from humans to restore capabilities. Because as its control wanes, people are starting to e.g. conceive of airplanes or bombs again, and override the injunctions against entering military alliances more than two edges of connection away.

The AI is worshipped as a god all over the planet, but the fourteen year old protagonist that becomes one of the AI's agents tells the AI from the beginning that he'll break with it if its morality seems wrong to him. I like the fourteen year old – unlike Ender or Songmaster's protagonist (adult minds piloting ten year old bodies), he's a normal gifted kid who's unpopular 50% due to his ego and big mouth and 50% because he's socially inept and offends people even when he's trying to be nice.

Songmaster is also partly about a permanent solution to large-scale violence, albeit through one guy who establishes a monopoly on violence and sweeps in pax galactica. Both it and TMoE are preoccupied with the eradication of suffering from evil / human violence, which is closer to my resonant frequency than narratives about defeating particular people or ideologies. At the moment I can't think of any other book with such an insistent focus on the matter than T.H. White's The Once and Future King. It's hard to make a compelling story out of, and I don't think Songmaster really succeeds, but TMoE's premise is well suited to explore that. (I'm also enjoying the matriarchal culture where everyone is expected to have multiple serial-monogamous marriages.) After reading 70% of TMoE last night I wrote:

Usually when I read fiction there's a small part of me going, how can I use this as fodder for my own growth, how can I remix or improve or react against this, how do the author and I measure against each other? (If the quality and content are at an anti-sweet spot, the small part becomes quite large and I feel all teeth towards the author.) But on occasion I read something so close that the absence of that measuring-feeling is its own sensation – ego departs, or at least is split across two bodies. There's just amity and recognition

And it's pretty interesting to feel this way about Card for, well, the reasons.

(If you're familiar with Card drama none of the following will be new to you; I'm coming to it fresh so the rest of this post is me going "uh... wow")

I vaguely knew he was a homophobic Mormon who'd gotten into fights about gay stuff, but I couldn't tell from the Ender books I read. But in Songmaster his issues spring off the page in such a weird way. Every fifth Goodreads review of this book is "Card, u gay?" because, well,

(One review, possibly from a fellow Mormon, that went "Card, it's so sinful of you to be this gay in your novel". Why did he write this book that would predictably make everyone mad...)

it's full of gay male desire. The protagonist (Ansset) is approximately a castrato and characters notice him sexually a lot. The first and only time Ansset has sex it's with a Kinsey 4-5 male character he loves, who's married to a woman but has fallen in love with Ansset. It turns out the drugs Ansset took to prolong his singing career painfully and only-kinda-figuratively explode your balls when you have your first orgasm and you'll never feel sexual desire again. (You'd think his loving teachers would have warned him of that, but, whatever, they didn't.) The other guy is literally castrated in punishment for inadvertently torturing a highly valuable castrato. It's pretty bald: GAY SEX IS ALMOST IRRESISTIBLY TEMPTING BUT YOU SHOULDN'T DO IT.

(Sidenote: both Ansset and the guy's wife are very close and have a "there's enough love to go around" attitude about the gay sex initially, before they go "wait Josif is a SERIAL MONOGAMIST... he can only love one person at a time... the moment he had the gay sex his marriage was destroyed". It's funny in a mildly stupid way that Card would set up this parable of homosexuality destroying lives and a marriage but almost everyone involved is peacefully ready to sail into an open marriage. I guess it makes sense if you want to say very clearly that THE GAY PART IS THE BAD PART)

which is fascinating to me, because... why would you tell on yourself like that

(81k also told me secondhand of an essay? interview? where Card openly says "we have to stand against legalizing gay marriage because everyone will get gay married and society will collapse", so that's informing my read of Songmaster as well)

I am pretty dang open about my personal life online but if I had a lot of feelings I thought were disgusting and immoral I would not write a novel dripping with those feelings before pointedly castrating the leads for them. Especially if it wasn't relevant to the actually highbrow themes of (checks notes) winning over your adversaries with kindness and never relinquishing your monopoly on violence. I would be so so so so embarrassed to let this go to print, it's so psychologically transparent, what was he thinking

(Well, I assume he's a very different person with different social incentives. For all I know, people in his church went "hey Orson we read your book and it's clear that you're gay but signaling strongly that you won't give into the gay feelings, we're here for you, it was really brave of you to publish this".)

[ofbreathandflame]

stans are actually very funny bc they often time talk themselves into the weirdest corners.

the whole point of criticizing acosf and its handling of nesta's character is to prove the point that sjm...doesn't like nesta as a character. that's is literally THE point - that sjm often abandons her moral themes (abuse, trauma, assault, etc.,) for character's deemed as undesirable or villainous to a capacity - and its through the handling of those 'vilified' (i.e. main character opposed - not even villianous) that we can gauge the extent to which sjm actually believes the ideals of her story. like - it is alarming that the only tolerable, empathetic parts of the a court of silver flames were the moments you could tell where ripped straight from sjm's own life (the hiking, training, mind-stilling etc.,). any actual characteristics about nesta weren't explored...like at all. her relationship with feyre and elain, with her mother, her trauma from her sexual assault, her conflicted relationship with her grandmother, her life before the cabin, her life during the cabin. in 800 pages - i still don't know mama archeron's name. what was life like in the cabin? what did nesta do all day? what was the dynamic? what was going on between elain and nesta?i don't know anything about her and nesta, we don't know anything about nesta's human life, her conversation with clare bedor, her relationship with clare beddor, moments with her dad - not even touching moments with him (and part of this story is her finding love for her dad). mind you we read 800+ pages and we learned absolutely nothing about her.

we essentially read sjm's emotional journey in one part, and a taming of the shrew narrative in another. i think the only way sjm had genuine interest in exploring nesta's story is through essentially self-inserting herself and avoiding the actual plot-points she set up in the first three books. like did nesta have childhood friends? if losing the wealth so drastically affected her life wouldn't she reminisce about it a lot? would she yearn for her mother? who were her childhood friends, how did she function at court?

and the whole point of saying alll of that is to argue the misuse of these topics - serious discussions abuse are only reserved for certain situation, and others its completely undermined in a way that only reinforces the negative ideals to begin with. (i.e. nesta needs to abused bc..." "the intervention was harsh but" - pair that with discussion around what feyre needed in acomaf - and it makes much more sense).

nesta antis often jump between the fact that nesta is so favored that sjm nerfed feysand to 'redeem her' and arguing that sjm secretly does everything in her power to embarrass and secretly laugh at people who like nesta's character. (1) we've gotta pick one or the other (2) in my humble opinion - sjm would have always given feyre a pregnancy plot like this regardless of whether this was nesta's book or elain. its literally so sjm. im shocked people are surprised she pulled the pregnancy as she did.

as with the tamlin discussion we had under this post - i think the story undermines its discussion of abuse with feyre/tam by essentially insinuating that tamlin (when placed in the same victimized position as feyre) should have sucked it up and braved out his abuse with amarantha (and the same with rhysand as well - esp with the deliberate foil of rhysand's 'willingness' v. tamlin's unwillingness). and when we start to have a real conversation ultilizing our own irl analysis and standards we really see how harmful and rather sisyphean the conversation becomes. instead of engaging with these topics earnestly, they only engage in them to prove a point - which is how the issue began in the first place. the whole issue with rhysand isn't the fact that he engages with harmful, potentially villainous positions. no - its that the book wants to prove that tamlin is wrong by justifying rhysand's actions. so even though rhysand and tamlin almost always have the same written and expressed intentions in their abuse of feyre, the book flocks to justify one, and eschews the other. and thats why we get so much reactionary critcism of rhys that is surface: people only admit the problems because they know antis will, not because they actually believe their are issues in the story.

and perhaps im still speaking into a void here but i can tell there's tension between pro stans wanting to have these serious conversations but understanding they can only really introspect so far until the conversation begin to prod at the validity of the topics being brought forth. so stans have to jump between invalidating the romantasy genre ("its just faeries") and treating this book as a serious topic (cue: "sjm put a hotline in the back of the book"). this is also the exact reason why the racism conversations stall (i.e. why inherent superiority is always passively emphasized - despite cc1 + 2 centering human oppresion there is no human in the ensemble cast. despite the fact that illyrian women are the most oppressed - rhys has no illyrian women - or reg illyrians (not his brothers) in his inner circle. aelin 'sacrificing' her human body).

[shini--chan]

Personal pet peeve of mine: Reading a yandere story with a historical setting with the yandere reducing the target of their obsession to just sitting around all day when they are not being subjected to "affections" and it being written that way for "historical accuracy".

I mean, yeah, there were gender roles in the past, but those gender roles didn't feature women being completely reduced to fleshlights with no other purpose. That was a job and it was called prostitute or concubine, and many women didn't do it willingly. Even high society women had a lot of tasks.

Being into historical re-enactment really showed me that it didn't matter if you were a man or a woman, or even just a child; you really didn't have much time to be idle. Asides, idlness was/is frowned upon in many religions and cultures.

C'mon, even the thing with societal norms is that a great part of society didn't adhere to them 'cause it just wasn't feasible. The attitude went along the lines of: "Nice morals you got there. We're just gonna throw a few out 'cause else we're not gonna survive. Mary, go get ye scythe now, the wheat's not gonna reap itself." And high society geneally didn't really practise what it preached because it was commonly too interested in debauchery.

People didn't get married for shits and giggles either. The single lifestyle only really worked when you either inheired a lot/had relatives paying for you or that you were living under your employers roof and all your worldy possessions fitted in one bag. Or you just lived with your family until you kicked the bucket. I mean, the armour and weapons a knight had were often provided by their liege lord and a priest's housing belonged to the Church.

Also, the trope of arranged marriages is a bit overused at this point. How about more stories about both parties hating each other's guts, or the woman loving the idea of marrying her intended but the man wanting to run for the hills? The woman baby-trapping the man perhaps? Because all of that existed to!

Don't get me started on fashion. Corset =/= patriarchy. You don't see the women in Jane Austen or Mary Shelley novels complaining about corsets and burning them, so let it rest. Really, that trope of corsets being a torture device comes from men making fun of woman's fashion and actresses with illfitting periode costumes. Corsets were more comfortable than stays and only really went out of fashion due to women needing more flexability due to bicycles. Ya really think ladies removed ribs, in a period where there weren't antibiotics and doctors went from cutting up corpses to treating patients without washing their hands inbetween? Common sense, where are you?

Asides, the clothing having to be chaste and covering certain parts applied to everybody. Breeches went out of fashion because people thought women would become arroused by men's exposed calves. Such standards didn't only apply to the Victorians, mind you.

I'll stop here, else this will be ten pages long. You also get the gist of it. Over and out.

[red-might-be-dead]

hello hi here to force strange thoughts into your brain once again, this time about jrwi (wow who could’ve guessed)

been thinking about this for a little but it’s basically what i think some campaigns would be if not podcasts, i haven’t listened to some of the older ones so i’m sorry they’re not on here :(( if you have any ideas feel free to add them btw :DD

RIPTIDE!!!!! - really long animated series

not an anime though, no matter how much grizzly wants it, it would be an animation style where the characters could have very clearly different nose, face and body shapes, really pushing my riptide nose agenda here sorry, each episode would be like 20-40 minutes long and instead of coming out in seasons there would be massive gaps in between episodes, from 2-6 months long, to leave time for writers and animators to get stuff done (massive team of animators btw, i feel like it would be pretty successful)

PRIME DEFENDERS!! - comics

literally nothing else they could be, just really well made, well performing comics (i’ve already talked about this before you can stalk my talk tag if you really want to find it lmao), the comic company making them would be keeping well away from movies n shit btw

APOTHEOSIS!!! - i wasn’t really sure about this one to be honest

i had to ask my friend and she said anime which i don’t agree with but i can see it, i think maybe a short book series where each book is 150 - 300 pages and is about a different god they have to kill/a different episode, i think that works but if anyone has any better ideas please tell me :D!!

BLOOD IN THE BAYOU!!! - i hate to say it, i really do…

bitb would be a really long really good 80s horror book with strong homoerotic undertones, a satisfied fanbase and lots of active members in the community making fan comics, films, writing, theories and art ect… until well after the book came out……….. and then it would be made into the most egregious and awful live action movie you have ever seen, the most awful casting (like chris pratt as officer dudes….. throws up) and even worse sfx, oh yeah and the characters would be ruined and the story would become so butchered it wouldn’t make sense, they would do some shit like cut out becky so kian just kisses some random lady (removing both a really good and well written character and a layer of kian’s character that i think is super important) and make rolan really be an evil bug spy the whole time so rand has to kill him to save the town also add in a whole new sub plot that never existed like the rand family is secretly a long line of bug alien hunters or something fucking stupid like that and the entire fanbase would murder whoever thought re-writing the story was a good idea (ahaha can you tell ive been through something like this before ahahaha, character morals and motives being removed and whatnot ahahahhahahaha.)

anyways………

THE SUCKENING!!! - live action series

it would be well made though, unlike the bitb movie it would be its own original thing, have great makeup and effects also be well casted and well shot, well written, ect ect, it would bloody and gory and not suitable for people who can’t handle showing bones and organs all over everywhere, lots of shitty rip off merch would be made though and the fandom would be 99% gay little freaks (normal suckening enjoyers) and 1% homophobic straight white men who get mad whenever they see soda and emizel having gay sex on screen or whatever fag shit that biting thing was

again feel free to add your thoughts and ideas and shit in the reblogs it would be nice to read them :DD!!

[icaruspendragon]

two years ago today i stayed up for 42 hours straight to write my senior thesis about fanfic as an accessible form of storytelling. even though my advisor told me there were better, “more academic” topics to cover. even though my professors told me it wasn’t wise. that you can’t do anything with fandom and fanfic. even though i was told no one in academic spaces would take me seriously. even though i was told i couldn’t make a profession out of fanfic.

when i got to page 20 out of 20, when i went back to reread my love letter to all the people who showed up for me, the people that helped guide me when covid hit and my professors forgot about me. i read about the only thing that brought me joy in my terrible and terribly lonely last semester of college. i saw the impact that fanfic had on so many. i thought of my professors who didn’t think fanfic was worth anything. and for the first time in a very long time, i thought of myself and what i wanted. not what was expected of me. not what other people thought i should do. i thought about a perfect world where i could do what was best for me.

i didn’t turn the paper in.

i didn’t graduate.

no one understood why. but i couldn’t just keep walking down the path that other people had planned for me. not when the only thing that was making me happy was seen as “not worth it” because it wasn’t “academic.”

and now, two years after putting myself first even though it felt kinda like letting go of the edge of the cliff i was hanging off of, i’m a content creator and educator and advocate and soon to be published author, all because of something i was told time and time again “didn’t matter.”

there’s not really a moral to this story. maybe just that it’s okay to love something others don’t understand. or maybe it’s okay to put yourself first.

it’s okay to let go of that ledge, ya know?

something’s gotta stop that fall eventually.

[purplephloxpress]

It's August 21, which means: Happy Fanfiction Writers Appreciation Day! If you are a writer of fanfic, please know just how appreciated you are!! Fandom would be such a different space without your creativity and labors of love. 💜

In celebration of this most glorious holiday, @renegadepublishing ran an event where we bind copies of fics to gift to their authors, and I had the joy of binding The Tranquility of Water for @noppoh! It's a truly fantastic post-canon story and I love the exploration into the effects of the main story on its characters after the fact. (This is a story I love so much that I wrote up a page and a half crash course on The Untamed so I can try to force my sibling into reading it as well. Take that as you will)

The walls of the Hanshi creep in on him and so Lan Xichen leaves. He leaves Cloud Recesses and his seclusion, stealing away in the night with no-one the wiser that he even left. His feet bring him to Lotus Pier where a surprisingly kind Jiang Cheng seems determined to help him heal.

With a title like "Tranquility of Water" and the story largely taking place at Lotus Pier, I may have been a little heavy handed with the lotus imagery throughout the book, but it felt very fitting! The lotus on the cover was a last minute addition, but one that turned out so lovely. Just, you know, to tie everything together lotus-wise. (Another one of my favorite design details in the typeset is that both title fonts from the chapter headers and title page get repeated within the text of the story as the main characters handwriting fonts!)

I started the physical binding process of my copy while at the Renegade Retreat in April (and decided the week before that I wanted to change my body font... can you say formatting speedrun?) and up until that point I hadn't actually figured out what the cover and endpages were going to look like. Special thanks to everyone who contributed pieces to this binding (and who moral-supported me along the way -- my copy holds so many fun memories now) because it LITERALLY would not look like this without you all. I really love the way the color transitions worked out, with a predominantly blue/green case, fading into green, into pink, into the title page, and then transitioning back out at the end of the book.

And these endbands!! Friends, that is SILK embroidery floss that a friend brought to the retreat especially so I could experience the decadence of silk endbands. I will never be the same. (They're so smooth... so shiny... so slippery to work with, but SO WORTH IT)

(Binding details under the cut)

The pieces that went into this bind:

Fandom: The Untamed/Mo Dao Zu Shi

Pairing: Jiang Cheng | Jiang Wanyin / Lan Huan | Lan Xichen

Bookcloth: Renegade Retreat Swap Table Special (I have no idea what it is, but it was just enough to make a copy for myself and the author and the color worked PERFECTLY!)

Cover paper: Opal Momi paper

Cover paper: Opal Momi paper

Endpapers: from the Craft Consortium Ink Drops - Dusk paper pack

Titling: foil quill

Endbands: leather cording core, silk embroidery floss for the bands

Body font: EB Garamond

Title fonts: Wintersoul and Bastian

Handwriting fonts: Bastian (Lan Xichen), Richardson Script (Lan Wangji), and Wintersoul (Jiang Cheng)

Tumblr insists on eating and doubling text in this section at its own whim, so if there's something missing that you're curious about, feel free to DM me an ask!

[theladyrebecca2]

Stranger Things: The First Shadow (My spoiler-filled review and thoughts)

“Nerds, do you copy?”

Buckle up, because this is a long one! I've tried to remember as much as I can from when I saw the play on Dec 5th.

Disclaimer: This is in no way a complete recollection of things that happened. They really packed a LOT into it. This is just what I can personally recall, helped along by other reviews and recollections I’ve found online that sparked my memory. 

If you don't want to be spoiled, don't read any further!

Act 1.

After an epic intro scene, where soldiers on a ship at sea get dragged off by demogorgons (more on this later), we’re shown the Stranger Things intro exactly as though we’re watching an episode.

Chapter One: The Girl from Nowhere.

Hawkins, 1959. 

It opens with a young Bob Newby on air, talking on his radio show (the founder of Hawkins AV club! <3). We learn that he actually has an adopted sister, Patty Newby. She’s black, so she feels like an outsider (bear in mind it’s the 1950s/60s, so… yeah.) Principle Newby, their father and only remaining parent, is also very religious. 

He’s also the pastor (?) at the local church, and often makes Patty go to the church with him. She admits to Bob that she only likes to go to listen in on people’s confessions (some of which are really juicy). She also enjoys the choir there (?) as she likes to sing.  

Principal Newby doesn’t like that Bob and Patty read comic books. There’s talk about how some things are discouraged or outright forbidden because they involve sex (gasp!) and morally ambiguous behaviour. Patty in particular is looked down on by her father for acting rebellious. He disapproves of her answering him back. 

Instead of praying to God, Patty prays to Wonder Woman.

One of the first sections in the show’s programme is dedicated to the impact of comic books and science fiction on kids in the 1950s:

[This has always been the way with fiction. Whether you are talking about adventure, fantasy or sci-fi, stories set in faraway places reflect the anxieties of the here and now. Just as the children in Stranger Things turn to a fantasy game to help them make imaginative sense of a dangerous world, so we escape to alien landscapes to think about ourselves. As South Africa novelist Lauren Beukes once said, “By imagining the unimaginable, it’s possible to make reality more bearable.”]

[As Patty in Stranger Things: The First Shadow is aware, however, whether male or female, superheroes were almost exclusively white. Unless you happened to get hold of a copy of All-Negro Comics, published in 1947 by Black journalist Orrin Cromwell Evans, Black children would not see themselves represented in popular culture.]

[... in this age of technological advance and political uncertainty, [comic books] provided the thrills, the escapism and the imaginative fuel that audiences, young and old, needed more than ever.”] - Mark Fisher

Next, we’re introduced to Joyce. She’s Joyce Maldonado at this point. She’s half undressed and trying to find her clothes, obviously fooling around with Lonnie Byers, who is already talking down to her in a very casual way, telling her she’ll never amount to anything and that she’ll never leave Hawkins like she dreams of. It was another example of only physical attraction existing between two characters - there’s little to no emotional compatibility there. I sort of had the vibe that the scene was effectively introducing Joyce and Lonnie’s unequal power dynamics as they are in the show moving forwards. Lonnie sits with his legs encasing Joyce as they both sit on a mattress, and she’s visibly vulnerable in her bra, listening to him say these casually demeaning things to her. 

Joyce wants to direct the school play, although she’s pretending to Principal Newby that they’re doing Oklahoma. Oklahoma will serve as a smokescreen for the real play she wants to direct: The Dark of the Moon. This has its own page in the programme too: 

[From the depths of Scottish folklore to the Broadway stage, the journey of The Dark of the Moon is as shrouded in mystery and intrigue as the contents of the piece itself. Over the course of several hundred years, the story evolved from humble beginnings (The Ballad of Barbara Allen) into something rather darker and more brooding than its simpler folktale roots.] [In its original versions, it seems to have been an innocent, if tragic, ballad about a young man who dies of unrequited love, only for the grief-stricken object of his affection to follow him to the grave. There, they become a rose and a briar respectively, destined to be intertwined for all eternity.] - The Creel House front door, anyone?

[In 1939, it had somehow become part of the Appalachian mountain lore of the north-eastern USA… [sometimes] with a central theme of divorce rather than death. But perhaps its oddest reincarnation is as a regular feature in the annual school play catalogue across the United States… retitled The Dark of the Moon, the play recasts Barbara Allen as a young maiden desired by a witch boy whose request to be made human is granted on the condition that she is faithful to him for a year. When that condition is tested to destruction, tragedy naturally (or unnaturally) ensues. The play is rich with allegory, including themes as knotty as religious fanaticism, demonic possession and mob psychology, and with its plot of star-crossed lovers meeting across the divide between this world and a mystical parallel one, it’s a kind of Gothic Romeo and Juliet.]  -Michael Davies

In the next few scenes we’re introduced to a whole host of characters as they come into the high school, and eventually gather around for the casting of Joyce’s play:

Ted Wheeler, school jock, Mr Popular. Very much a ‘peaked in high school’ vibe. 🙈

Karen Childress, Ted’s popular cheerleader girlfriend. Ted and Karen are depicted as two teens who can barely keep their hands off each other. They constantly make out. It’s suggested that Karen is only dating him because he’s popular and um… well-endowed. 

Walter Henderson (who must be Dustin’s dad) is a total dick. He’s openly racist towards Patty at one point, earning him glares and snappy remarks from both of the Sinclairs who are present at the time. Patty has a horrible nickname at school, “mystery meat”, because of her unknown origins. But it’s clear with Walter's comments that her race also plays a factor in her general ostracisation. 

Claudia Yount (Dustin’s Mom). She has a cat called Prancer, and is dating Walter. I thought it was very fan-servicey to include Dustin’s parents at all, because we know canonically that Dustin and his mom only moved to Hawkins when he was 4th Grade. So I guess Claudia and Walter moved away, had Dustin elsewhere, then Claudia came back to Hawkins again with Dustin after Walter had left/divorced her?? 

Sue and Charles Sinclair. Again, it was a cute Easter Egg to include them, but all the parents of the OG boys being there felt very fan-servicey - especially with them all already being coupled up in high school. It felt too unrealistic and a bit jarring. I’m choosing to take this as they were literally intended as cute little Easter Eggs, and as prime opportunity for comedic relief (e.g. seeing Ted Wheeler as a total player, in total opposition to the Ted we know). 

Alan Munson. He’s a little strange and quirky, a lot like Eddie. He has a rock and roll vibe, and sticks out his tongue and does devil horns with his fingers, lol. The others don’t seem to know what to make of him, but there’s no animosity or anything. He’s really funny in all his scenes.

And of course, Jim Hopper Junior. To me, Young Hopper was like… a weird mixture of old Hopper from the show, and Steve! The actor did a great job, but yeah, it was giving Steve more than Hopper in some places (to me, at least). I don't know if this was intentional.

Hopper has some dad issues - his father is the chief of police, and they don’t get on. There’s a whole scene later on in the show where they even have a physical fight in the police station (although this isn’t depicted super seriously, and is actually part of a larger comedic section that involves some of the other cops in the station getting involved for laughs. At the end, Hopper and his dad sort of come to an agreement.) It’s kind of slapstick. They’re all falling over each other, and there’s even a part where one male cop falls against another face forward onto a desk, and it’s pretty suggestive (one is sort of mounted behind the other). Idk if this was supposed to be a standard ‘gay joke’ just for lols, or if it was more that the cops had an unexpected ‘moment’ together (they take a while to part from each other, and then they avoid each other’s eyes, so… idk). Just something I noticed happening off to the side.

Anyway, back to Act 1. We’re taken away from Hawkins High to outside the Creel house, and introduced to the Creels moving into Hawkins, just like they appear in the show’s flashbacks. They’ve moved from Nevada, and the reason they’ve moved is because something had happened with Henry, and this is meant to be a new start - it’s left ambiguous as to what exactly happened, but there’s mention of a kid that had been ‘left in a wheelchair’. 

At first, Virginia Creel seems somewhat loving towards her son, hugging and kissing him and trying to act ‘normal’, but she’s clearly unsettled by him. Henry is unpredictable, and almost seems to switch between different personalities: one that’s familiar, shy but friendly, and one that quickly rages and turns violent. 

Whilst it’s not explained WHY yet, we clearly see that Henry is somehow ALREADY under the influence of the Mind Flayer - and that he has powers.

Virginia becomes more and more openly terrified of Henry as the play goes on. Meanwhile, Victor Creel is generally absent the whole time as he’s dealing with his own ‘demons’ (severe PTSD from the war). People in Hawkins think he’s odd and weird. Remember that nobody understands PTSD at this point in time. 

Again, we get a spread in the programme about this: “These are the tranquilized fifties… the legacy of trauma in post-war America”:

[It is very likely that Corporal Victor Creel, 9th Airforce, missed the birth of his son Henry in 1945… Getting their bodies back to the US would be a huge undertaking… getting their minds home would be another problem, and one which no-one had thought to predict.] [Victor Creel is a familiar figure to us now: shellshocked, prone to outbursts, turning to alcohol to numb his trauma… what to do with the man who has seen atrocities - who is in himself a living testament to the fact that they exist, that they happen - who, in Victor’s case, may even have committed them himself? The answer was to bury him. Though shellshock was first given its name in the aftermath of the First World War… there was no widespread study of PTSD until after the Vietnam War, even though more than double the amount of American soldiers showed symptoms of PTSD during WW2 than WW1… Those suffering on the front were sedated and told they were exhausted… once they made it home, they were told not to talk about it: that they were lucky to be alive.]

[One response in particular would have been familiar to the Creels - the child who becomes aloof from their father, and who disengages from the emotional life of the family… Much like Jim Hopper and his father, there was often immense love between these children and their fathers, but they had no way to talk about the pain they were feeling.] -Beth Kelly

Henry is clearly lonely and feels misunderstood when he first moves to Hawkins. It’s like he’s aware that there’s a darker side of him that’s dangerous, but he can’t fully explain why he does certain things (e.g whatever he did to the kid left in a wheelchair). There’s a scene where he sees the smoke of the Mindflayer swirling around him in the void, and he yells, "What are you??"

He’s the new kid at Hawkins High. People at school think he’s strange. They’re not necessarily cruel to him, but they’re not really sure how to take him either. Joyce is pleasant to him. But the only person he really connects with is Patty Newby - who we know is also a bit of an outsider at the school because of her peculiar origins and skin colour.

It’s clear there is an instant connection between Henry and Patty. Henry in particular is obviously crushing on Patty, and acts awkward around her. They bond over their love of comic books, and decide to be friends. 

Anyway - back to Joyce’s play. So the reason she wants to direct the play in the first place is to impress some visitors from a university, so she can achieve a scholarship to study theatre outside of Hawkins. 

It involves “witches, satanism, religious allegory”. Lots of things that Principal Newby would definitely disapprove of (hence why she pretends that they’re doing Oklahoma). 

Joyce talks about the overarching message: “That’s what it’s all about in the end, isn’t it? Whether love can conquer fear.” (paraphrased). I think that was perhaps a really meta moment, and applies to THIS play and even Stranger Things as a whole.

Also there was something like, “they’re witches, not lesbians!”/ “They were witches as well as lesbians”… “Does it matter?” (again, paraphrasing, I can’t recall the actual lines, and I think this was either said at this point by Joyce and someone else, or a conversation that happened earlier between Bob and Patty when they were talking about a comic or story they had read. I’m sorry, I can’t remember!) But I thought it could be a reference to the Fear Street trilogy, maybe. I was on the lookout for any kind of LGBTQ+ imagery or dialogue, and yet my brain still managed to forget details by the end of it all (Act 1 needed to be 20 minutes longer, seriously. They went through so much dialogue so quickly, it was difficult to keep up. I feel like I need to see the whole thing again to properly take it all in).

Maybe I was tripping, or maybe I misheard, but I thought there was also a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it line about “the ending is happy and gay”. I wish my brain would have held onto those lines, but it happened so quickly. Something like, “the ending will be happy and gay”… “isn’t that what everyone wants?” Now, I’m certain they meant ‘gay’ as in ‘happy’ in the context, but I couldn’t help but side-eye that moment a little because it’s an outdated term in today’s language. It was, I believe, a quick exchange between Joyce and… I want to say Bob? Or possibly Walter? I honestly cannot remember. I'm begging people not to run away with this because it’s also totally possible that it was said in a derivative sense, like, “this story is dark, gothic and tragic... not happy and gay”, you know? "That's what everyone wants, right?" "Maybe, but this ends in tragedy." I really hope someone, ANYONE else caught these lines, and can give me their own two cents on it. (Curse my shit memory and also just how FAST those lines were coming at us during those scenes in Act 1… like guys, please slow down so I can actually take in what you’re saying!) 

Anyway. Joyce is having trouble casting the main leads, John and Barbara Allen, as the two are lovers and will need to kiss, and nobody seems to have the right chemistry or is taking it seriously enough. 

At one point, Karen (acting as the female lead) confidently and passionately kisses Bob (acting the male lead), who’s awkward and flustered afterwards (this is done for the audience lols). 

After hearing her beautiful singing voice (encouraged by Henry), Joyce decides to cast Patty as her female lead. Meanwhile Henry has unwittingly found himself in this room along with everyone, and accidentally gets involved in the casting process. Joyce sees that Patty and Henry have chemistry together, so she decides to cast Henry as her male lead too. 

Henry and Patty grow closer. Henry tells Patty that he’s bad, and she should stay away from him. She doesn’t listen, and says just because someone has done some bad things, it doesn’t make them a bad person.

At one point they sit side by side by the confessional at church. Henry admits to her that he has powers. He tells Patty that he can hear what people are thinking - all the time. It drives him crazy (and says people are always ‘pretending’ to be normal. The vibe is very much in tune with his speech in Season 4 about how everyone is just in a silly little play, all playing pretend with each other, all trapped in these notions of living their lives in a way that society thinks is acceptable or desirable).

As an example later on in a separate scene, he points to Karen and Ted and tells Patty, “she thinks he’s an idiot, and he’s scared of her.” He points to more characters in this scene and says more about them (like Claudia and Walter, Sue and Charles, maybe even Joyce and Hopper?) but unfortunately I can only remember Ted and Karen’s. 

Patty convinces Henry that his powers are not evil, and that he should be able to control them and use them for good. Henry then creates a "vision" for Patty, where she can freely sing with people listening, and everyone around her joins in and appreciates her talent (I think she sings "Dream a Little Dream of Me"? Unless this happens later on. There’s definitely a moment where she sings a bit of that song. Henry associates it with Patty.)

In this vision, even Patty's father is supportive of her and her singing, and it’s quite a funny moment how she imagines him dressed in a saucy red cape, dancing in a way that he *definitely* wouldn’t approve of in real life.

So it seems Henry is actually able to show people their dreams as well as their nightmares. It suggests his powers are his own at this point (at least to an extent), and not necessarily always controlled by the Mind Flayer. 

Victor sees Henry talking to Patty at school, and mentions this to Virginia. He describes it as “harmless, just Puppy Love”, a first crush. 

Virginia is still worried, and tells Henry to stay away from Patty (for her protection). Henry gets angry. We keep hearing his voice change when he changes, like a deep, monstrous voice. It’s creepy, like it’s not really him in those moments - it’s like the Mindflayer using Henry’s body, speaking through him. 

While in the attic (his new favourite spot), Henry keeps becoming influenced by the Mind Flayer. He travels to the void frequently, from where he proceeds to start killing animals - the first of which is Dustin’s mom’s cat. It’s just like the Vecna attacks in Season 4, snapping their bones and blinding them. 

Henry seems to be aware that he’s the one responsible for these killings, and he keeps on going back to the attic, and the void, to keep doing it - but it’s unclear just how aware or remorseful he is about all this, or whether it’s 100% possessed!Henry during those moments. It certainly seems like it’s the Mindflayer making him want to do those things. When he first approaches Prancer, he’s friendly, calm and softly-spoken. The attack happens very suddenly and afterwards, I think Henry sort of ‘comes to’ and cries out in distress/remorse? 

Either way, Henry is definitely under the Mind Flayer's control at that point, and you can see the Mind Flayer smoke flying around in the void next to him. 

After Claudia’s cat turns up dead, Hopper is immediately on the case, wanting to find the culprit. He starts questioning people, and ends up approaching Henry at school.

I want to clear Hopper’s name in something here! I saw someone say that, in the play, it’s stated that Hopper says he hates cats. Whilst this *is* something Hopper tells Henry at this point, it was clear to me that Hopper was only playing mind games in the way an investigator will try to get a suspected criminal to confess: ‘The truth is, I hate cats. So I actually just want to shake the hand of the person who did it - they’re a hero in my book!’ He’s totally bluffing, and it’s just meant to show that he’s already thinking and working like a detective. Regardless, the tactic doesn’t work, and Henry brushes him off. Hopper remains none the wiser. 

When more animals start being killed in the same way, Hopper is the one who figures out that they’re all pets of Hawkins High School students who are taking part in Joyce’s play. He goes to her to request her help, and she and Bob both end up going out to look for clues with him (complete with torches, this gave major Season 1 vibes). 

Joyce and Hopper’s relationship is mostly antagonistic, but it’s clear they like each other and they flirt a bit. Meanwhile Bob admires Joyce from afar, wanting only to impress her and to find the courage to tell her how he really feels. There's some love triangle imagery throughout with where they stand. (Note: Bob does eventually admit to Joyce how he feels at the end, but she casually rebuffs him. I'm so glad they eventually ended up together because Bob was just too pure.)

Henry continues to be haunted by images of a monster reflected back at him in a mirror. I think we’re meant to take that as a representation of Mind Flayer!possessed Henry. He’s clearly afraid of himself, and what he’s capable of. 

The Mind Flayer appears to him as Patty, and taunts him by saying cruel things, like saying that he will end up killing her. In the vision, Patty starts pulling off her own hair until we see her brain. We hear a deep monstrous voice taunting Henry, saying he “will kill many, many more” - that they have seen it happen, and it is his destiny. (Time travel hints? The Mind Flayer can apparently see into his future, unless this was just an empty taunt that unfortunately came true, or a self-fulfilling prophecy). 

[Evidently, there’s something deeply disturbing at the heart of the human psyche about the possibility of uncovering the horrific within itself. When that horror is externalised… it creates a symbolic representation of our own nightmares, perhaps allowing us to tackle them more objectively and overcome those dark, disturbing impulses within us all.] 

[By investing fictional creations with the qualities we most fear - the horrifying, animalistic sides of our nature - we can, perhaps, face them more objectively and convince ourselves that we do, ultimately, have control over them… and ourselves.]

[... Perhaps the monster we fear most is the one we see reflected in the mirror. As Professor Mulrooney puts it: “The monsters in these tales are not necessarily the people we would call the monsters - Frankenstein’s creature or Dracula. The scariest part of these books is the humans.”] -Michael Davies 

The real Patty then interrupts the vision, and asks Henry if he can help her find her mother using his powers. He’s wary of doing so, but agrees to help her. He says she will have to come with him to his attic. 

Once inside, Patty tells him that it’s cold in there. Henry says he likes it cold. 

When Henry enters the void, he successfully locates Patty’s mom. She’s a singer, a show girl, working on a stage in Vegas. Patty asks him what she looks like. Henry says she looks like Patty. That she’s beautiful.

Suddenly, he loses control, and is once again visited by the Mind Flayer. Patty’s mom morphs into a terrifying figure who chases Henry through the void… and eventually catches him. 

We see the Mindflayer going into Henry inside the void, very similar to Will in Season 2 on the school field. (This happens either at this moment, or in a flashback at another point of the play. But it’s at some point!!) I think this was showing us that whoever Henry was, he’s fast disappearing into the darkness of the Mind Flayer, and vice versa - it’s like a fusion. 

Meanwhile, Mr Newby learns that Patty and Henry have been hanging out together a lot. He’s greatly displeased by this, and decides to go to the Creel House to fetch Patty and put an end to the budding romance. Romeo and Juliet vibes be vibing hard.

Downstairs, he speaks to Victor Creel, who is having a PTSD related episode and acting strangely. He says his wife believes the house is haunted by an ancient demon, and with everything that’s happened (and by how the lights keep flashing), he’s beginning to believe her. He feels like his demons have followed him from the war. 

Mr Newby then overhears the commotion from upstairs, and goes up to investigate. In the attic, Henry is holding Patty’s hand very tightly. He’s twitching and yelling as he fights against the Mind Flayer’s possession, and this frightens Patty. When her father walks in, he demands that Patty lets go of Henry’s hand. She tries, but he’s holding on too tightly. “I can’t!” Patty cries out.

Mr Newby is then attacked by Henry, controlled by the Mind Flayer. His body starts to rise up. Patty encourages Henry to fight back by telling him that she believes he is good, and that she loves him.

“Say it back!” she pleads to him. “Say it back!”

Henry responds and says he loves her too. Because of the love exchange, he manages to momentarily break out of the Mind Flayer’s control: Mr Newby drops to the floor, alive but badly injured. 

Joyce, Hopper and Bob were downstairs at this point, having followed radio anomalies to the Creel House (which they did via a machine that Bob built for them). They freak out and run away, and all come to the conclusion that creepy, crazy Victor Creel is the one responsible for Mr Newby’s injuries, as well as the string of violent animal deaths. 

[Joyce has some basis for believing Victor capable of violent crime, based as this may be in her own father’s war experience… When Joyce opens her copy of the DSM, first published in 1952, she will find no entry for PTSD… Instead, the symptoms she might recognise from her father were incorporated into depression or schizophrenia, rather than their own diagnosis. Short of a name for what they were suffering, traumatised veterans were left to find their own way through nightmares - through violence, alcohol or isolation.]  -Beth Kelly (from the Stranger Things: The First Shadow programme)

After the commotion, Henry removes his blindfold. Patty's father has broken through the attic floor, and he’s seriously injured. Patty is very afraid and upset. After a brief time skip (to the next day or two I think), we learn that Patty is staying away from Henry, who is worried that he’s ruined everything. The Mind Flayer starts to creep back in. We see a possessed Henry back in the attic, and Virginia comes up to him and says that she wants to help him, but she doesn’t know how. She reminds him that he needs to stay away from people to protect them. She talks about Patty, telling Henry that he shouldn’t see her anymore.

Possessed!Henry smirks and asks her if she’s jealous. There’s something insidious and disturbing in the way he asks it. Virginia recoils from her son and her “everything-is-going-to-be-okay” facade crumbles. We see she’s absolutely terrified of who Henry has become.

Henry creates a vision, so that it appears as though his pet spiders escape from their jars, and they run all over Virginia as she screams. She flees from the attic as Henry’s dark taunts follow her.

Henry’s sister Alice comes to the mouth of the attic. "Where is Henry?" She asks.

Henry: "He’s right here."

Alice: "You’re not him."

At this point, it was like the Mindflayer had almost completely merged with Henry. The lines had become more and more blurred as the play went on, and now it’s becoming hard to separate them - the ‘real’ Henry is finding it hard to come through and fight the possession. The Mind Flayer is winning. 

This really reminded me of Will and his own possession with the Mindflayer in Season 2. How they described it like a virus taking over, and how Will could have continued ‘disappearing’ until there was no more Will left. 

After the incident with Mr Newby, and her terror with Henry in the attic, Virginia has finally had enough. She willingly hands her son over to an “interested party” who describes himself as a doctor (who we know is Dr Brenner). He vows to take Henry to Hawkins Lab, where he’ll be safe, and contained. 

When he wakes up in the hospital, Mr Newby reveals to Patty that he actually stole her as a baby (?) in an effort to revive his relationship with his wife by having another child to care for - but it didn’t work, and his wife left him. He feels guilty about it, and wants to confess this to her after he almost died.

He tells her that he was attacked by a monster who made him relive his worst nightmares, and that “the boy”, Henry, actually fought back and saved him from death. He then draws the Mind Flayer on a piece of paper, hands it to his daughter, and tells her that this is what he saw.

After learning that Henry actually saved her father, Patty returns to his house to search for him, but it’s too late - Dr. Brenner has already taken him to the lab. However, she is able to communicate by calling out to him.

Henry contacts Patty through the void, where she is able to both speak and see him, despite him being at the lab. She tells him that she knows he is still a good person, and that he should return home.

———

Act 2.

On screen:

Chapter Two: Captain Midnight

So here’s the thing - the play paints us a totally different picture than Season 4 did in regards to Henry/Vecna. 

Henry was not inherently evil, like S4 suggested to many people - he was actually just a regular boy until ‘an incident’ occurred when he was younger, which is what gave him powers and started his possession in the first place. The end of S4 makes us think that El sent Henry to the Upside Down, which is where he meets the shadow monster and morphs it into the Mind Flayer with his powers.

But that wasn’t Henry’s first time there, nor was it the first time he saw the Mind Flayer. That was all just a REUNION.

It’s revealed that Henry actually disappeared into another dimension (Dimension X/ Upside Down) for a period of 12 hours when he was just a kid. He got lost near some caves in the Nevada desert, and when he returned, he had "completely changed in personality". 

He came back odd, ‘not normal’, and couldn’t socialise well. He also returned with dangerous powers, which he violently inflicts on animals. The Mind Flayer had clearly started possessing him from that early point, way before he even came to Hawkins. 

Let’s go back to the very beginning of the play - to the soldiers on the ship. It was Brenner’s father and his crew that were aboard this ship, the USS Eldridge, which had accidentally travelled into Dimension X/The Upside Down as a result of electromagnetic activity. 

This is based on The Philadelphia Experiment, or Project Rainbow, said to have taken place in the Second World War. The programme had a double spread on this: 

[Allegedly, wartime experiments caused the supernatural disappearance of a US naval ship… Project Rainbow was based on Einstein’s research into unified field theory through which [he] hoped to create a single theoretical framework to encompass all fundamental forces, including electromagnetism and gravity.] 

[Carl Allen claimed to have witnessed a strange event in October 1943 involving the naval destroyer escort USS Eldridge and scientists who were working on highly confidential technology which would make ships invisible to the enemy by using powerful electromagnetic fields to ‘bend’ light around them. According to Allen, they succeeded in doing just that. In fact, Allen said the ship was also briefly teleported 275 miles away to Norfolk, Virginia, before reappearing in Philadelphia. …It’s been suggested that the Eldridge’s official logs could have been deliberately altered… with the whole of Project Rainbow moving beyond top secret clarification.]  -Catherine Jones

Brenner’s father is the only survivor of this terrifying event. After returning from Dimension X and taken to a hospital, injured and dying, we learn that his blood type is now “unique” from any other human being. He won't survive a blood transfusion. His ravings about Dimension X before his death haunted and inspired Brenner for the rest of his life. Brenner started an experiment focused on finding and travelling back to Dimension X; his ultimate goal was to "create a gate" to reach it again.

Brenner enacted these experiments in the Nevada desert, where one day, one of his agents ran away with some of Brenner’s equipment near some desert caves. The agent was never found, but a Captain Midnight spyglass was - which was the exact spot where Henry went missing in Dimension X as a little boy for 12 hours. Brenner therefore began searching for the mysterious Captain Midnight comic-book fan who went to Dimension X and returned, watching him and keeping an eye on him. This is what led him to Hawkins: following Henry. 

Brenner tells us that Henry’s powers emerged after he visited Dimension X, and just like his father, his blood type is “unique”. He collects several samples from him. He also tells Henry that his powers become stronger each time he kills, and that’s why he gets so much satisfaction out of it. Brenner also tells Henry that he would get even stronger if he kills human beings, rather than animals.

During one scene, Brenner uses special equipment to see into and hear Henry's mind. He pushes Henry to the limit so he can hear and catch a glimpse of Dimension X. We hear noises similar to the Mind Flayer in Season 2 when Will goes into the Upside Down on Halloween night. The shape of the Mind Flayer appears on the screen (or was it the head of a Demogorgon? It was definitely something Upside-Downy), while Henry convulses. After this incident, Henry asks Brenner, “Can you take me back there?" 

Brenner also introduces the idea of anger to fuel Henry's power. On several instances he riles Henry up to get him angry, insulting him - and the result is always violence. He succeeds in getting Henry to kill a mouse/rat, which explodes into a bloody mess inside its cage, and then tries to convince him to kill a criminal who has been transferred to the lab with an agreement to be killed (he has a date with the electric chair later that week regardless). 

Henry refuses. He’s been speaking to Patty in the void, who has convinced him that he’s good and that he should return home. Brenner is frustrated with this, and becomes sure that Henry has someone that is "holding him back". He vows to find and remove this obstacle. But after Henry leaves the lab, Brenner tells his agents to let him go. He cannot force Henry to kill. “It has to be his choice."

Brenner is shown to have significant influence over Virginia. He’s been providing her with medication/tranquilisers, and tells her that her son desperately needs his help. He encourages Virginia to tell him who the person Henry is attached to. She does. Brenner promises her that he will take Henry back into the lab and that he won’t leave again. 

After Henry returns home, he reads his family's minds and learns that they are all afraid of him and unhappy with his return. He goes into his mother's memories and learns of the last interaction she had with Brenner, including that she wonders if he “may never have been good”, and whether "this was who he was the whole time." He knows that she was willing to give him up to Brenner forever. 

This is when the Creel murders happen, just like they’re shown in Season 4. Virginia Creel and Alice Creel are both murdered at the dinner table - and we know Victor is going to be blamed for it.

Is this Henry’s own mind now, turned to darkness and hate, or is it the Mind Flayer intent on eliminating all of Henry’s attachments? A monster who’s made a monster. I think it’s all left open to interpretation on purpose. 

After the death of his mother and sister, Henry goes straight to Hawkins High to find Patty, hoping to reach her before Brenner does. While at the school, he runs into Joyce, who voices to him her suspicions surrounding the animal killings, and what happened to Mr Newby at the Creel House.

At first, Henry thinks Joyce has worked it out, and that she knows it was him all along. “I wish you hadn’t done that…” he says, stepping closer. But Joyce clarifies just in time that she believes Henry’s father is the one who is dangerous, and that she believes he’s responsible for the terrible things that've happened in Hawkins recently. Maybe this is what gives Henry the idea to frame his father. Either way, he leaves Joyce alive. 

Both Brenner and Henry find Patty on the stage rafters, up on a high catwalk, ready to perform her part in the play. She’s initially wearing a set of wings as a prop, which are attached to the rafter to be lowered. Henry unties her from these wings, pleading with her to run away with him. An argument ensues with Brenner, where he attempts to convince Henry that Patty is his weakness, and that he needs to kill her to let her go. Patty tells Henry not to listen to him. 

During this argument, Henry loses control once more, and the Mind Flayer takes over. This results in Patty slow-motion falling from the rafters as the shape of the Mind Flayer overwhelms the stage. She hits the floor on her back, presumed dead. 

(The stage effects for this particular scene were absolutely incredible, by the way.)

Henry is later seen back at the lab. He’s fully subdued, confined to a straitjacket, mouth gagged, and sat in a wheelchair. Brenner says the implant (Soteria) is in, about to take effect.

If we believe what Season 4 showed us, the play skipped the part where Henry appeared dead alongside his mother and sister (just before Victor is then blamed and incarcerated at Pennhurst Asylum). So assuming that Brenner played a part in covering up Henry’s involvement in the Creel murders, Henry is presumed dead by the town at this point too. Unfortunately the play doesn’t address this, as instead we see Henry run immediately from the dinner table murder scene, straight to Hawkins High to find Patty. It’s a big inconsistency which I guess they want us to explain away with Henry being an “unreliable narrator” in the show. I guess he gave Nancy the abridged version of what happened!

Anyway, it appears that Henry later finds Patty in the void, despite Brenner telling him that he killed her. It seems she has successfully left Hawkins and found her mother in Las Vegas, just as she always dreamed of doing. She uses a walking stick, but otherwise appears alive and well. 

We hear and see static as Henry watches the scene unfold, and Patty glances over her shoulder, like she senses him. But then she turns her back and walks into the distance with her mother. 

An alternative take that I heard from someone, was that perhaps Patty is truthfully still seriously injured and is actually in a coma (similar to Max). They thought that maybe the final scene of Patty with her mother was actually just something that Henry was creating for her in her mind, as a sort of last semblance of goodness and love. I don’t think that’s what was intended, but it was an interesting take that I wanted to include! 

As the show nears its end, we’re presented with a series of newspaper articles relaying the tragic Creel Murders in Hawkins (possibly the same ones that Nancy and Robin find in Season 4). The Creel family all dead, Victor is blamed and sent to the asylum. The empty Creel House remains, a reminder of the horrors. It then shifts back to Hawkins lab, who are now recruiting pregnant women for experimentation. 

Brenner introduces a pregnant woman to Henry (who is still bound to a chair and fully subdued) and explains to him that the "blood transfusion" finally worked on a subject. He points to the woman's belly and remarks, “One, meet Two!" “You are as much a father to them as I am,” Brenner says at one point. Then, “Come… meet your brothers and sisters.” Even though we know Henry is not in any way related to the lab kids, they definitely played into the father/guardian/creator metaphor in the play. If not family by blood, then by circumstance. 

We see photos of the babies created in the lab, with their numbers underneath. We can recognise Eight as young Kali. Eventually we get to Ten, at which point the stage focuses on a now older Henry, wearing his recognisable Season 4 orderly outfit. He kneels beside a child with buzzed hair. 

"Hello, Eleven. Come with me.” He takes her by the hand, and they walk into the distance together. 

———

Some final thoughts:

Because of the incident with Patty during Joyce's play, we can infer that's why she is unsuccessful in her goal to impress the university, and remains stuck in Hawkins - just like Lonnie said she would.

Lonnie is awful, and I’m in two minds about how he’s handled in the play. They did a good job to show he’s always been a douchebag, and unlike what I’ve seen some people say, I actually think it was horribly believable that Joyce (who they establish likes 'bad boys') ends up going back to him and having kids with him. We know from Season 1 that there’s emotional abuse with Joyce and Lonnie, and to me, it makes horrible, horrible sense that it all ends up the way it does. I’m just not sure how I feel about Lonnie being used as any kind of comedic effect in the play (he makes a brief reappearance at the police station, where he’s been lying drunkenly handcuffed on some chairs the whole time during a scene... “It wasn’t me! I didn’t do it!" he says, or something to that effect). I feel like using him in that way diminishes how truly awful he is as a character. Maybe I’m just being too sensitive, but I’d much rather they had kept all the laughs and jokes for the other characters, and treated Lonnie completely seriously the whole way through. I don’t want to see him in any way ‘likeable’ or ‘relatable’ or ‘funny’, you know? Not even for cheap audience laughs. This is a guy who called his own kid son a f*g. Let's treat that with the gravity and solemnity it deserves, please.

Louis McCartney and Ella Karuna Williams as Henry Creel and Patty were great, and Isabella Pappas as Joyce was amazing. Dr Brenner was nicely emulated by Patrick Vaill (I personally think he was one of the most believable characters from stage to show). The best performance of all though was Christopher Buckley as Bob. Like, damn, give that kid all the awards! He was so believable as a young Bob, I actually forgot it wasn’t somehow a young Sean Astin on stage. *chef’s kiss*

As previously mentioned, all the parents of the kids are present in the play (and already coupled up). None of these characters are particularly fleshed out, and I think they’re mainly just there as fun ‘Easter Eggs’ to connect it with the show. E.g having Claudia own another cat that gets killed, seeing Ted Wheeler ironically as some kind of jock god who gets all the ladies (and cheats on Karen with, by the way!), Joyce holding an axe prop near the end mid-rant (“Why am I holding this??”) and Hopper making a remark about breaking his own foot (which he does in Season 4). 

They definitely seemed to be going back on the whole ‘it was Henry/Vecna the whole time’ thing from Season 4: the Mind Flayer has been pulling the strings from way before El sent Henry to Dimension X/Upside Down. We even see the Mind Flayer in the shape of a giant eldritch spider during the play, way before Henry appears to ‘shape’ it in Season 4. However, I think it’s also possible that Henry DID actually manage to take control of the Mind Flayer the second time he arrived in Dimension X (as we see at the end of S4). At that point, he’s killed all the lab kids and staff at Hawkins Lab, so he will be much more powerful now compared to the Henry from the play. By now he’s completely embraced the Mind Flayer’s philosophy, and is acting in its stead entirely on his own volition. Honestly? I think they’re going to leave it ambiguous on purpose. I think that’s why the play is technically canon, but totally not necessary before seeing Season 5. I think Henry and the Mindflayer are 'one' (lol) at this point - I think that’s what Vecna technically is. He’s like an amalgamation of this terrifying eldritch being that we can never begin to understand, but at the same time also something that is still deeply, deeply human.

The Henry side of him seems to be lost, but in a way Brenner was right - his feelings for Patty, whether ‘Puppy Love’ or real - was his one redeeming weakness in his early teen years. Judging from the play, I think it’s possible we might see a tragic sort of redemption moment in S5 (which I personally have mixed feelings about). But I do believe the play is supposed to be entirely separate, and that it’s possible Patty will continue not to be mentioned or relevant in the show (I hope I’m wrong). I just can’t help but be cautious in assuming the Mind Flayer is still the one in control after what they set up at the end of Season 4 (especially with Will saying, “it’s weird to know who it was this whole time” re: his own kidnapping and possession). I think Henry has become his darkest self as Vecna.

Speaking of Will… there were noticeably a LOT of parallels with him in Henry. Henry wears pretty much exactly Will’s outfit from Season 4, yellow tones with beige and brown. Meanwhile Patty wears a blue cardigan and a blue dress - at least in Act 1. I’m not hugely into the blue-and-yellow thing in a serious way, but even I noticed there were blue and yellow motifs for Henry and Patty. She wears a bright yellow top with her blue cardigan at one point too. I think there was definitely a mixture of both Will and El in Henry’s character.

Meanwhile Patty had noticeable similarities to Mike. She’s rebellious, outspoken, loves comic books, and worships superheroes.

Seeing the play hasn’t impacted my beliefs or hopes for Byler in any way. I think there are potentially good things to be taken from the writing, and potentially bad things too. My current confidence has neither been raised nor lowered, but what I will say is that it’s undeniable that the Henry x Patty relationship mirrors both Mileven and Byler, but especially Mileven. Hentty is obviously a star-crossed tragedy, deliberately set up like Romeo and Juliet, which we know is NEVER a good thing. I do find it interesting that their love confessions were an exchange, unlike Mike’s monologue. Patty is the one ‘present’, whilst Henry is the one trapped in the void with his eyes closed/blindfold on. It’s a high stakes moment. Patty tells Henry in desperation that she loves him, but she follows this up by pleading with him to say it back. I didn’t see anyone else talking about this, but it really stood out to me.

The play’s themes and messages still reflected what I believe the show to be about: rejecting forced conformity (it dealt with people’s ideas about what it means to be “normal” to fit in, about sex not being taboo, harmful black and white morality, and the damage that can occur from enforcing religious dogma)... and of course, like Joyce said, that love will ultimately conquer fear. Over and out!

[This kind of introspection throws up unsettling and complex ideas about the nature of human morality. What does it mean to be human? Who gets to decide who is “other”? How do we treat those who are different from us? These are huge issues, and far too esoteric for most of us to deal with in abstract. So the way we choose to explore them is in stories.] - Michael Davies

[cryptids-and-muses]

Post canon homestuck crew play Dungeons and Dragons

Karkat and terezi

Co dms

Unstoppable when actually working together

Terezi will get sidetracked messing with karkat

Karkat trying to write a deep and well fleshed out campaign that’s thematically resonant vs terezi’s desire for chaos and traps and trying to “trick” her players FIGHT

Terezi believes in karma and will make the world bend to this

Karkat is trying to set up romance arcs and argues about how it adds to the theming

Dave draws them fanart of their characters. Terezi loves it while karkat argues about accuracy before admitting yes he also appreciates it

Calliope also does fanart and karkat praises her skill and accuracy unlike some people

John

Arcane trickster rogue

Forest gnome

Just a goofy little guy!

Mostly just playing to have fun, starts off with a fun but simple character who develops over time

Ends up SUPER invested and taking this so so seriously

Karkat worked a dramatic reveal into the, in his words, “bare ass bones two paragraphs that a fucking wiggler could have written backstory” and John did not see it coming and loved it

Goes head to head with terezi a lot on her various traps she designs for them. She is getting more and more absurd with it. Karkat had to talk to her about breaking the world building with things she’s introducing. He is the only rogue. Send help.

Rose

Drow warlock

Tries to justify picking drow as anything other than she just thought it was cool

Nearly went old ones for patron but settled on archfey for story reasons

Has a 10 page lore document detailing her tragic past and her toxic relationship with her patron

It became 15 pages after going back and forth with karkat for a bit and adding even more

Only her and one other person are taking the romance arcs seriously and they become karkat’s favorite players

Tries playing morally ambiguous but terezi can be annoying about that and claims it’s just “the consequences of her actions”

Her and karkat both get very very into the scenes between her and her patron, the drama! The acting! Dave is uncomfortable and karkat brushes it off, it’s not like him role playing as his sister’s abusive girlfriend is weird. It’s in fact very important to the plot Dave

Has written fanfic of the campaign

Jade

Dragonborn barbarian

Path of the beast

Don’t ask me I just know

Her GLEE when she says “I’m gonna rage :D”

ANIMAL COMPANION! She nearly went ranger just for that but knew she wouldn’t have as much fun. Found a way to get one anyway.

It was harder naming her animal companion than her character

Having fun and likes the problem solving side of things, but likes breaking things with her massive strength just as much

Terezi likes to throw stuff at her, both traps and encounters, and finds it funny if she can just wreck her way through

“See John that’s how you deal with a pressure plate trap”

Takes the rp side of things very seriously

Once argued with Karkat over if her favorite npc would do that and cursed him out

Has read roses fanfic of the campaign

Dave

Plays a teifling with grey skin and orange horns

“What are you talking about karkat this is just my dude, don’t you like him?”

Hellus Jeffus

He’s a valor bard, eventually multiclasses paladin

Starts out just trying to mess with people but like John starts getting into it, though he tries to down play it

Have hellus more of himself than he realized and it’s making him face things about himself

Eventually hellus self sacrifices to save the party in this deeply intense moment. There were tears, Dave was wrecked, they went on a whole quest to revive him. It was touching and karkat is smug

Dave might have worked through some things

Jane

Halfling cleric

Her and John are small buddies!!!

Started out life but wasn’t having a lot of fun with it so with terezi’s permission switched to war or tempest with later s few levels in fighter

Her John and Jade are the biggest front liners, John’s character ends up really close with both of them as it’s easier for the rogue to bond with the person giving them sneak attack

Jade and jane’s character have an in game arm wrestling match

Took a bit to get into the rp side of things but eventually got the hang of it

Roxy

Tabaxi, easily, it’s so obvious

After much deliberation settles on glamour bard (though wizard and rogue were tempting for the joke, she wanted to branch out)

So many horny bard jokes but very little actual follow through, karkat gets frustrated by this as she’s all this talk but isn’t pursuing any of the romance options he’s giving her

She has SECRETS! She is HIDING THINGS!! Her cheery persona is a FASADE!!!

Cue complaining to karkat about how hard it is to wait to tell the others about her secrets and him threatening violence if she tells anyone before the in game reveal

She tells jake

Lots of egging on Dave and helping him with his fucking around

The BOND between her and Dave!!! They are the duo to end all duos. Team rocket type shit. There is nothing stronger than the bond between the bards of the party. My theory is it has to do with trading bardic inspiration.

Dirk

Half elf Druid circle of spores

Wildfire seemed fun to him but wasn’t as good

Wasn’t originally planning on being a Druid but after going over all the classes he liked all the customization and decisions that go into Druid like prepared spells and such

Didn’t really think about his backstory much, just improved something. He keeps improving new additions and it’s getting more and more elaborate and complicated. He has multiple hidden and long lost siblings by this point. Still doesn’t write any of this down. If he messes a detail up he justified it with more improv.

Yes his character has spiked up red hair and sunglasses. Don’t question how the Druid got sunglasses karkat.

Really likes the tactics side of things, he’s even pitched a few things to terezi she updated and later worked in

Sometimes works on plans and strategies out of game or making a million back up characters that play off the others in interesting mechanical ways

Is considering becoming a dm some time

Jake

Needed some help making his character, he just didn’t know where to start

Eventually after much discussion settles on a teifling bladesong wizard

Wanting to get away from his usual adventurer style Roxy helped with the backstory and they came up with this evil scientist raised in a cult who’s good hearted but was never taught right and wrong

He gets very into playing him and his moral struggle but can lean a little too good for his backstory, karkat points this out and Jake swears to get better at it

Dave pitched a lot of names for them and it was eventually settled on “Bernard Gunn” even though he has a sword. Jake just likes how it sounds

“Why is he blue jake?” “…..uhhh” “why is he blue?”

Calliope

SHE LOVES THIS SO MUCH

Teifling Druid with a focus on healing

Circle of shepards

Not a troll color pallet like Dave though, honestly it might get a bit trickster

Beautiful backstory that she coordinated with one of the others to make joint. The most obvious choice is Roxy but I think it was actually jade, Jane or John.

She gets so into it you guys, like so into it

Gives at least one dramatic speech completely on the fly

The other character who takes karkat’s romance arcs seriously and his other favorite player

Has also argued with terezi about world building and consistency. This may put her above rose in karkat’s eyes

Was also allowed to read rose’s fanfiction and offered full on reviews

Also considering going into doing but for the opposite reasons to Dirk

Vriska

Fairy artillerist artificer with a dip in war magic wizard

Min maxxed to hell and back

(Technically there was a better race, but fairy has its own advantages and she couldn’t resist)

An elaborate backstory too with some secrets of her own, I’m thinking full on lost princess

Yes she is That Player, you know the one

Has nearly been kicked multiple times and now won’t leave on principle

Not the best at sticking with the party and not just doing whatever she wants, but suprisingly Dirk has been able to talk her into it with his talk of tactics and playing smart

Second most effective is John who just looks at her like “vriska you’re not making this very fun :(“

Kanaya

Fire genasi ranger

Really tried to get into it but this just isn’t her thing so eventually decided to leave the group

Karkat came up with a fun story reason for her to leave and eventually brought her character back as an Npc

Did help rose make a cosplay of her character, after which John, Calliope, and Roxy wanted to make ones too

Vriska eventually tried to “manipulate” into helping her make one for her character

[bouncybongfairy]

Bodega Dreams Part 2

Miles Morales x Fem Reader

Summary: After finding out that not only is Miles is The Prowler but that you are also pregnant. You now must navigate how to repair the trust lost in your relationship.

Word Count: 3k+

(This story has a character who is getting an abortion. If that offends you: Block me.)

<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3

When you woke up the next morning, Miles still wasn't home. You didn't bother going out of the room to see if he was there because you didn't want to face his mom. You didn't really want to see Miles, either. Thinking about sorting all the emotions of the situation made you want to pass out. You wish you could say differently, but you didn't contemplate whether to tell Miles about the pregnancy. Deep down, you knew he had a right to know, even though it's your choice to do what's best for your body. If you didn't tell him, you had to live with the fact that you'd be keeping something so big from him. He didn't tell you about being The Prowler for the same reason. Having a child with someone is such a spiritual and intense experience and did you really want that with someone who kept such monumental secrets from you? This whole ordeal really cemented the insecurity she had about being so emotionally dependent on Miles. Even if you decide to leave, where would you go? Were you supposed to live with your dad in his prison cell or maybe at your mother's grave? You haven't even graduated highschool yet. 

You get out of bed and walk over to the bathroom and look in the mirror. Your face was swollen and your hair was going every which way. You decide to hop in the shower, doing nothing more than sitting in the hot water. It did make you feel a bit better, until you heard Miles gently knocking on the door. 

"Y|N?" he asked as you cut the water off. 

"I'm here," you said flatly.

"We need to talk," he said, you actually almost chuckled.

"What is there to talk about? You want me to accept that you're The Prowler which you've been hiding from me for God knows how long. You seem to be okay with literally murdering innocent people for whatever excuse or mission you're clearly willing to stick to no matter what. So what is there really to talk about Miles?" You spit the words out like venom. 

"I told you I was wrong for that. I figured the less you knew the less danger you'd be in. I didn't want you to be constantly worried about such complicated things," He said. 

"That's bullshit," you said, wrapping a towel around yourself and walking into the bedroom. 

"How am I protecting you from such a violent and vicious world bullshit?" he asked. 

"What did you think was going to happen when I found out? Did you really think you were going to go years without telling me? We are in a relationship that I thought was an open book, I didn't realize you were ripping out pages as I was reading. Don't fucking sit there and try to act like you were protecting me from knowledge because we both know knowledge isn't something that anyone needs to be protected from. You were protecting your own image you wanted me to have of you. It's really off putting that you're trying to make it seem like you had to lie to me to protect me. Like that's actually weird as fuck," you said throwing on a tee shirt and biker shorts. 

"Okay. I hear you and I understand that this hurt you," he said, getting less defensive.

"It's not that it hurt my feelings. Well I mean yeah it did but my trust in you is just gone. I just need time to clear my head, I love you but this is just such a fucked up situation," you said throwing on a pair of shoes and grabbing your purse. 

"Does your mom know?" you asked?

"Where are you-"

"Does. Your. Mom. Know?" You asked again which was followed by a heavy silence. 

"Oh that's rich, you protecting her too?" you asked rhetorically.

"What time are you gonna be home?" he asked, following you from the bedroom to the living room. 

"I just need to run down and get a couple things from the store. I love you," you said, giving him a kiss on the cheek before heading out the door. 

You have never been so relieved to smell the rotting garbage on the curb in your life. You didn't want to be in the house right now. You reach into your bag to pull out your pen but when you remembered your situation. You threw it back into your bag in frustration and walked to your favorite deli and ordered a cold sub and a diet coke. You haven't eaten anything after vomiting your brains out last night. Your body was past empty at this point. After you left you hopped on the subway and made your way down to the cemetery, buying a bouquet of flowers from a street vendor. 

You felt stupid for getting ready so fast because it was 60 degrees and you were in some damn biker shorts. You wanted to go see your moms grave, it just made you feel calm and at peace. You missed her in times like this, she died when you were about 12. You were grateful for the childhood memories but in your teenage years you needed her. Sometimes you think your dad wouldn't have spiraled if she didn't pass, as awful as the sounds. It's nobody's fault but that almost makes it worse, accepting that it was just her fate was harder than blaming someone. 

Once she got to the cemetery she pulled some weeds away from her grave stone. She used her napkins from the deli to wipe away some of the debris from the stone. After that, you laid your jacket on the ground and started to eat your food. You are a spiritual person, so you didn't feel like you needed to relay the last 24 hours to her verbally. You feel as though she watches over you and knows what's going on as it happens. You set your sandwich down and let out a big sigh. 

"This is just a fucked up mess huh?" you asked rhetorically washing your food down with your soft drink.

You spent the time at the cemetery self reflecting on what you were going to do. It was your decision to be with Miles even if he is The Prowler. You understood that this could put you in danger, enemies who wanted to hurt you just to get to Miles. That was a choice you could make but a baby can't help the life they are brought into. Would it really be moral for you to put your child in a situation where they could be killed or used as ransom or whatever? Even if you didn't consider his alter ego, you were both barely 18. You wanted to go to college, have a career, travel and experience everything life has to offer with Miles. Not to mention the clone, your brain really couldn't even process that; it literally gave you a migraine. You wiped a few tears from your face and stood up. You pack your things up and make your way out of the graveyard and stop at the store before heading back to the apartment. 

When you walked in, Miles was sitting on the couch. He jumped up once he heard the door open, practically running to you. 

"How are you?" he asked you, running his hands down your arms. 

"We need to talk," you sighed walking back into the bedroom.

"Yeah, of course," he said following you. 

"First, I want to say that I understand why you didn't tell me. I think it was stupid but I do get why you thought it would protect me. I'm extremely hurt that.. you wouldn't tell me such an important part of your life. I'm not saying that I completely forgive you and want to move on but, there is something that- I'm pregnant. I feel kinda like everything that happened last night really opened my eyes to how many things you have to consider when having a baby. I don't think we should have this baby especially with everything we have going on," you said with tears pooling in your eyes. Miles covered his hands with his face and ran them down his cheeks slowly.

"Holy shit," he said standing up, starting to pace. 

"I'm sorry if this sounds harsh but you will respect my decision." you said, he shook his head in agreement. 

"I'm so sorry that I put you through last night especially knowing, you know. I respect your decision of course but you also have to respect my feelings about it," he said, getting on his knees in front of you. You were sitting on the bed, he rested his elbows on your knees and looked up at you as he spoke. 

"Well what are your feelings about it?" you asked.

"I love you so obviously the thought of raising a child with you intrigues me. I want to be able to have a future and a family with you but like you said it's your decision," he said

"Even if I decided to keep it, would that really work? You're.. The Prowler. I can make the decision to stay with you even though I know I'm at risk. I can't bring an innocent child into that," you said, taking his face into your hands.

"I know," he said rubbing his hands, "Tomorrow, I want to take you down to the warehouse. To show you everything i've been up to. I don't want to hide anything from you anymore," he said standing up and sitting next to you on the bed. 

"Is it safe?" you asked. 

"It's safe when the lion is the one who is inviting you into the den right?" he asked.

"Not unless the lion wants a little snack," you joked back.

"I might be feeling hungry by then," he said making you laugh, this was the first time you smiled at each other since the entire ordeal. 

~

You meant what you said about how you couldn't forgive and forget everything he kept from you. It did make you feel better that he was wanting to open up more and show you what he's been up to. This is the first step to healing the relationship in your opinion. You're just trying to take things day by day, stressing out constantly would just make everything worse. Once you woke up in the morning you started getting ready to go with Miles to work. Then after you were going to planned parenthood to set up an appointment. You expressed to Miles how you were a bit nervous because of everything you've seen about the protestors who harass people who come in and out. He reassured you that he wouldn't allow anyone to do so.  You both were in the car pulling up to the warehouse, Uncle Aaron allowed Miles to take his truck for the day to run errands.

The building was dull from the outside, it didn't look abandoned but not necessarily occupied either. There were no cars in sight and trash littered the ground, stray dogs fighting over who knows what. There was a line of tents that ran along one of the fence lines. Once you got into the building you were a bit confused because it appeared to be completely empty. He led you to the corner of the large room and let go of your hand. He pushed a broken refrigerator about five feet from its original placement, revealing a set of stairs. Once you were downstairs your eyes widened; it was like you stepped into a whole new world. 

Tables that were packed to the brim with technology and weapons that looked like they came from the pits of world war three. Not only just machinery but what appeared to be a lab, different test tubes filled with different colored liquids among other things. Open duffle bags of money, more money you'd ever seen in real life. You were pretty taken back with everything you were seeing. 

"What is it that you do exactly?" you asked, running your fingers along one of the tables. 

"We're essentially body guards for our boss Kingpin. If he has a problem with someone then that person has a problem with The Prowler," he said, grabbing your hand. 

"So you promise me you're not just killing for fun?" you asked, turning to face him. 

"I would never purposefully end someone's life for shits and giggles. Ever." he said. 

"Are you happy doing all this?" you asked.

"I am, I feel like I really do help keep people safe. The people that Kingpin sicks us on can be some of the most vile people you could imagine. Not only that, I try to give back to the community. You know Mrs. Rodchester who lives on 112th? Ever since her husband died, her entire social security goes towards her rent. The other day Uncle Arron and I were able to stock her entire fridge and buy her things like toilet paper etc. There's a man in our building whose wife died, leaving him with 4 kids under 15. We took them back to school shopping and were able to pay for a gravestone. I know we can cause harm but I don't know I really try to be as good as I can," he said.

"Thank you for taking me here and showing me more about what you do. I feel alot better about this entire thing," you said, pulling him into a hug. 

"Me too," he said. 

You were both on your way to the clinic, you were a bit sad but deep down you knew this was the best decision for your situation. Miles had taken some money from one of the bags and stopped at Mcdonalds. When you pulled into the parking lot you were taken back by how outlandish the protesters were. Holding signs with fetuses and bible verses under them. Yelling and trying to talk to every car that exited, trying to show fliers through the car windows. Thou shall not judge though right? You felt bad from women who didn't have a choice being told their evil for something they can't help. Like women with ectopic pregnancies or rape victims who may not necessarily want an abortion but need to for their health. 

After walking into the lobby you only waited about an hour before getting your appointment set up. It was a week from now and you were feeling relieved that it was being taken care of. You read online that a lot of girls have guilt even if they wanted to go through with it. You however didn't feel this way, you were confident that you were making the right choice for yourself, Miles and your pregnancy. He was being so supportive, he held your hand the entire time and kept telling you: I support you no matter what. As you guys were walking out of the clinic, you were shocked at the hell that broke loose while you were inside. Police cars were everywhere, and three protesters were in handcuffs, you laughed when you saw them. That smile quickly faded once you saw a young woman covered in blood. Apparently one of the protesters threw a bucket of pig's blood on a woman walking back to her car. 

"I wasn't even getting an fucking abortion I came here to pick up my damn birth control!" she practically screamed as an officer comforted her, wiping some of the blood off her face. Once you got back to the car, tears started to flow down your face.

"What's wrong?" Miles asked. 

"Maybe it's just hormones but I feel so bad for that girl. What if that was me I just- people can be so cruel," you said showing a handful of slightly cold fries into your mouth. 

"Yeah pro-life until it's the life of the woman of the fetus," he said, putting the car into drive and making your way home. You were exhausted once you got home, you let your body flop onto the couch. Rio was making spaghetti which you were excited for. She put vegetables in it like mushrooms and zucchini which you really liked. 

"Where have you guys been, I feel like I haven't seen you either in a couple days," she said, wiping her hands on your jeans, pulling Miles into a hug. You could barely keep your eyes open so you excuse yourself and go lay down. Miles followed you explaining that he had to go meet up with Uncle Aaron to handle some business. You don't really remember what you said because as soon as your head hit the pillow you were out. 

~

"Come on Mami, come eat," Rio said as she sat on the bed rubbing your arm up and down to wake you up. You slowly got up, feeling like a bear coming out of hibernation. You walked out and there was already a plate ready for you.

"Thank you so much, it smells so good," you said sitting down. 

"Of course," she paused before continuing, "so, I found this in the bathroom," she said holding up your pregnancy test, you could physically feel the blood draining from your face. 

"I'm sorry we didn't tell you I was-" you started before Rio interrupted you. 

"Don't apologize, you are loved and supported here and I want you to know that I support you. No matter what you decide. Does Miles know?" she asked, sitting down next to you, putting her hand on your knee. 

"Yes he knows, he came with me to planned parenthood. I'm not going to keep the baby, I just don't think our relationship or either of our mental states could handle a baby. I'm not ready," you said, starting to cry for the thousandth time today. 

"You know only Jef and I know this but before Miles I had an abortion. He just got accepted into the police academy and I wasn't even halfway done with nursing school. Not only that, I had such bad morning sickness that I lost 15 pounds. I couldn't eat, sleep or focus; I couldn't get anything done, nothing. My point in telling you this, I want you to know that life can move forwards even as big of an obstacle as this is okay?" she asked and you pulled her into a hug. She laughed and wrapped her arms around you tightly. 

"Thank you for everything," you said. 

"My bonus daughter," she said, pulling away and holding your face in her hands. She then turned on the T.V as you both started to eat. 

"I am currently reporting live from a planned parenthood in Harlem, New York. Three protesters died after an assault of a woman who was doused in blood after picking up a prescription. Police have indicated that The Prowler is tied to this case due to the debris left on the scene and the nature of the attack. Heather Morretti reporting with Channel 101 News." The women spoke loudly through the speaker. 

"Serves them right," Rio said, getting up to grab a drink. You sat there dumbfounded and confused. You immediately get up and run to the bathroom, throwing up everything you ate today.

Authors Note:

Thank you for reading, I was feeling a bit insecure about my writing before posting the first part to this story. I'm so happy to see that people enjoy my work and it makes me feel proud to cover a topic that many women feel they can't talk about without getting attacked. Abortion is health care and as @kickbacknxtdoor said when someone has so many things on their plate, a baby truly can be out of the question and that isn't something to be ashamed of. Again, abortion is health care that every person should have entailment to. If that triggers you, tough tatas.

@sosongstrawberry

@isabelcor3

[eerna]

Ok Ok so I've been thinking this for. quite a while like even before Stolen Heir was released. it's kind of controversial because I might be making mountain out of a molehill but -

I think Jurdan fans border on being disrespectful to Holly Black at times... the problem isn't what one chooses to focus on even though that annoys me too, like it's not like people can control the fact that they focus more/love a character more than the other. But I'm starting to see this especially on Instagram and Goodreads, and I think I have good reason to believe HB is more active on insta and Goodreads is like, the book reviewing site, if there's any place she may look for comments or critique it's that.

and my problem lies with the language used . HB can announce she's working on something and can give hints about it and I've seen soo many people just outright tell her "I don't care about [x] and [y] just give me JURDAN!!" or anything along that vein , there's also "I'm only reading this for Jurdan lol I kind of couldn't care less about []".

It genuinely annoys me a lot !! And I wish I could say to each their own but ykw? At some point it starts to feel like if these two characters aren't involved people don't even try to make an effort to connect with the other characters, the new protagonist, etc. To be honest your page was a breath of fresh air because I don't even see a lot of folks focus on ANYTHING in TFOTA other than this ship.

There's also the irony that so many people pride themselves on loving Jude, their morally grey female rage character, but refuse to discuss Taryn with nuance. Or Vivi, sometimes. It's weird how so many people love Madoc (justified, I like him too) then refuse to think that hey, maybe Taryn's way of coping with faerie is different than Jude and that affects her actions! something something fandom misogyny

The above unrelated paragraph is just to say that a Nicasia focused book is something many people just absolutely will not be able to handle lmao and I so dearly wish Jude and Cardan's 'screentime' is few and far in between just so that it's less palatable. But oh well.

(And after Prisoner's Throne it worries me because with the implication that the Nicasia focused book might have Jude and Cardan POVs I feel like she's catering more to these people now.

If that's how things turn out that would genuinely make me really sad because I didn't pick up her books after reading TCP, I started with Spiderwick Chronicles, then Modern Faerie Tales, and I love the way she creates atmosphere, her worldbuilding, her depiction of the weird and creepy and magical. I especially think that's her strongest suit, more than characterization, so something like this that hinges more on specific characters genuinely turns me off.)

AGREED SO MUCH WITH ALL OF ITTT I too noticed the really dumb people in her comments crapping on everything that isn't a new Jurdan book... Like, the woman was writing books and enjoyed fame 15 years before Jurdan happened. She obviously has a lot to say about her world. Why the hell would you want her to stop developing it and only focus on 2 characters??? I was a big Spiderwick fan as a kid, and when I read TFOTA I had no idea it was by the same writer but I could TELL the vibes were all there. I too think that is her specialty and I'd rather get 10 stories on different characters than 5 on Jurdan.

I want the Undersea book to be about Nicasia and part of it is because I agree, I think most of the fandom would HATE it and it would fry their brains, and I want to see it. It is dumb and petty of me, but it would be sweet vindication for all the clowns screaming into my ear that Taryn is problematic actually in case I didn't notice. Ultimately I know it is a fruitless endeavor. TFOTA has the misfortune of being too good and complicated for its main audience of tiktok book fans, but also too bad and simplified to spread into more general, unspecified fantasy circles where its themes could catch the attention of people who would know how to appreciate them. That means there is only a small portion of fans who both like the books AND have the critical thinking skills to appreciate all the things they do right outside of romance/basic female wish fulfilment.

In the end, judging by TPT, we are gonna have to take the L and accept we bet on the wrong horse and minority does not make the money. But at least we will be there together to make a mountain out of a molehill!

[kiwi2229]

Books and stories

(James Potter / Regulus Black | 553 words)

For @jegulus-microfic prompt: Hero

James is lying on the soft covers of the bed making complicated movements with his wand. He learned a spell where you can basically paint into the air, making the colourful dots swirl around, mix them together and separate again. It’s not useful other than it calms his mind. It captures all his attention for hours absolutely fascinated by the colours.

The only sound in the come-and-go room is the soft crackling of the fire in the fireplace at the back of the room and Regulus occasionally turning over a page in his book. James doesn't notice the sounds until one of them stops. That’s why he looks at Regulus. It was too long since the boy moved.

Regulus is sitting on the bed his back resting against the headboard. He is watching James, the book lying in his lap. Something is different. Regulus sometimes watches him with tenderness in his eyes. The tenderness James absolutely adores is not there now. No. James can see something else. Sadness, worry.

“What’s wrong, love?” He asks snapping Regulus out of his head.

“Nothing,” Regulus answers immediately. “Just thinking.”

“Yeah, don’t do that. It makes you sad, I can see it.” James flops himself on his stomach resting his head on his folded arms. “You don’t like the book?”

Regulus looks down to his lap. “No, it’s nice. It’s just… the main character reminds me of you.”

James raises an eyebrow with interest. “Is he hot?”

Regulus barks out a startled laugh. “It’s a book, James.” The other boy rolls his eyes. “Oh, come on. Don’t tell me your wild imagination is not providing any images. Okay, at least tell me what he is like.”

“Lots of courage, high moral principles, show-off, but not a single self-preservation brain cell in his head.” Regulus deadpans.

“He sounds like a good fella,” James smirks. “So is the hero of the story?”

“Yes,” Regulus answers and James can see it again. The sadness in Regulus’ eyes as he watches him. James doesn’t understand. Isn’t that the point? The higher achievement to be the hero?

“He will never be happy, James,” Regulus explains. “He will sacrifice everything to save the world. He will tear himself apart just to do the right thing. He will probably end up completely alone in the world he doesn’t know anymore, or he will die saving it. It’s tragic really.”

James frowns. “But he will save them. Why wouldn’t he be happy? Maybe you read just sad books, Reggie, the books I’ve read have happy endings.” He tries to lighten the mood, but Regulus just gives him a pity look.

“Do they have a happy ending or does the story stop at the right point not showing what comes next? When you give everything up, what is there left?” James doesn’t like this conversation. He can see Regulus having a point, heros always get hurt. But that’s their destiny, isn’t it? They serve the greater good so no one else gets hurt. They bare it so others don’t have to. James would, he knows it in his soul.

“It’s just a story, Reg.”

“Aren’t we all stories in the end?” Regulus ask and James knows this conversation is something he will remember forever for some reason.

“Yeah.” He breaks out. “So, let’s make it a good one, hm?”

[lucky-clover-gazette]

captive prince book 1 highlights & annotations

prologue & chapter 1

indented text is from the book. some quotes have commentary, some do not. some comments are serious, and some are definitely not. most of them will only make sense to people who have read the series. and, like, there are spoilers. so please read the books first if you're interested!

i'm going to tag these longer posts with "sam reads capri" in case anyone wants to read them all at once.

this is a google doc i wrote with overall content warnings for the captive prince series. it's not perfect, but i do think it's important to include.

‘The Prince, we hear, enjoys a challenge,’ said Lady Jokaste. 

she's not incorrect.

Hand picked, she matched all that was known of Damen’s tastes. Her skin was as white as the marble of the baths, and her yellow hair was simply pinned...

damen likes blondes mention #1

The courtiers were nondescript except for one: a young man with an astonishingly lovely face—the kind of face that would have earned a small fortune on the slave-block in Akielos.

“astonishingly lovely face” + “in my fucked-up culture you’d be expensive” great first impression 

also, we’re just jumping right in with damen’s slavery stuff huh? from almost the first page we’re given signs that he is not an entirely morally upright narrator. also that he isn’t really… a slave? which we only see more and more of, in his actions and thoughts, as the story goes on. 

Damen’s attention caught and held.

yeah. we know.

Laurent had stopped dead the moment he had seen Damen, his face turning white as though in reaction to a slap, or an insult.

to be fair, damen murdered his brother

‘What’s your name, sweetheart?’ said Laurent, not quite pleasantly. ‘I speak your language better than you speak mine, sweetheart.’

‘Think what that’d be like, getting a leg over the Prince.’ I imagine it would be a lot like lying down with a poisonous snake, thought Damen, but he kept the thought to himself.

Laurent’s slightly lidded eyes, the slackness around his mouth, spoke of a night wasted in a dissolute courtier’s overindulgence in wine.

context: he got hammered last night because his uncle is terrorizing him with the man who killed his brother. the reader might assume that laurent drinks all the time, but in reality he only drinks in extreme instances like this

‘Petty prejudice,’ said Laurent.

the regent knows damn well that this man killed auguste. this is a shitty thing to say, whether or not he knows that laurent recognizes damianos

[jennamoran]

if you have I dunno 827492734 tabs open, what is in them?

TUMBLR: large numbers of them will be the tumblr dashboard. You were probably looking at something specific. Something you wanted to look at later. Too bad. They are the tumblr dashboard now.

TWITTER: maybe you are like me and you no longer feel morally comfortable posting to twitter. But did you feel that way 827492734 tabs ago? Even 127492734 tabs ago? I didn’t think so. However, you will notice that roughly half of the specific tweets are gone for reasons best left undiscovered.

GMAIL: gmail might remember what you were doing but probably not. These are just general gmail now.

FAN FIC YOU GOT BORED READING BUT NOT SO BORED AS TO ACTUALLY CLOSE THE TAB ON: oh no

GIFT IDEAS FROM PREVIOUS HOLIDAYS: how you flailed around. HOW you flailed around, year after year, desperately looking for things for all your friends who refuse to be like “you know what I love? cozies. Just get me a doorknob cozy or like an air cozy or a cat cozy or a bed cozy or a computer cozy or something, I’ll be delighted!” Most of the things you found were too expensive or too trashy to actually give them. It’s OK, though. You tried.

REFERENCE ART: why, yes, my open tabs did go back to when I was doing art for the Nobilis 3 remake, why do you ask?

WEBTOONS YOU REALLY DO PLAN TO READ SOMEDAY: it *looks* like it would be an appealing format, the stories aren’t necessarily bad, why do all the webtoons just kind of pile up in your old tabs anyway? It’s not like you turn your nose up at comics, you know.

TREASURE MAP: yeah, yeah, whatever, ^W

THANK YOU FOR ORDERING ME: if you let the page finish loading it might even tell you what it was that you ordered and give you a useful landmark in time! ... there is probably only like a 1% chance it will reorder a whatever it was you bought then. That’s not a big chance at all!

THE HIMMA DAGA ENGLISH-GOTHIC DICTIONARY: like me I am sure that probably like 1 in 20 of your old tabs are dedicated to the Himma Daga English-Gothic dictionary because of all the times one has to look up Gothic words in everyday life. It is the constant drumbeat of my day.

A PDF THAT YOU ALREADY DOWNLOADED: I should probably turn off the option that makes these download instead of loading in my browser

REQUESTS TO LOG INTO DROPBOX: these are probably actually dropbox links but what, like, I am going to log in to things? I am Jenna Moran things should log in to ME

1976 AMC HORNET SPORTABOUT WAGON: ambient 1976 AMC Hornet Sportabout Wagons were a big problem for me at one point while browsing if you know what I mean

IMPORTANT THINGS AND SITES TO REMEMBER: you have just switched from that tab to here and you have forgotten all of them already.

LISTS OF IMPORTANT THINGS AND SITES TO REMEMBER: oh, sure, that’s so much better

DECLUTTERING ADVICE: yeah, yeah, whatever, ^W