#STOP THIS IS MY FAVORITE MONSTER AND THE ONLY STRAWBERRY FLAVORED THING I LIKE

[coincasual]

part 1

just a thought… so like Briar.. as a botanist?

she takes/records classes so she can learn about plants

(briar in my au is cursed to make a plant monster, like the one in the show inside the big book, from whatever plant she pricks her finger on)

so she can be aware of what plants to avoid being too near, avoiding creating a monster and passing out

and also so she can have ways to defeat them scientifically written down and in her purse, if someone should find her and be able to complete the “herbicide” and defeat the monster, thus waking her

and during the class they are assigned the task of creating a new fruit? naturally briar chose an apple, in respect to her bffa, apple!

she set to work all semester on creating the perfect Apple apple. and after much trial and some err, she makes a new kind of apple for apple!

it’s gold speckled and yellowish white, it tastes like sparkling apple soda, the leaves of the little shrubby trees they grew on were edged with gold. the apples also only grew one at a time, and only one seed from each apple could be germinated. the apple also turned a slight blush pink if kept in the sun too long, and when that happened it has more of a sparkling strawberry rhubarb flavor.

Briar grew a perfect Apple apple, and set it in glass to keep it safe until she could give it to apple at an orchard party!

Faybelle happened to stop by and Briar had fallen asleep, they hadn’t been able to hang out as much in the past few weeks due to Briars extended botany labs. which was fine, Faybelle thought to herself. she knew she couldn’t… or rather shouldn’t be jealous of plants. Besides! they were going to hang out at Briar’s orchard party in just a few hours and- Faybelles stomach rumbled.

she looked around for a snack, a sparkle of gold caught her eye. in a glass dome in front of sleeping briar, sat a delicious looking white apple. she eyed the glimmering apple with hunger… just a bite wouldn’t hurt, would it? after all, she’s her favorite person! Briar had never let Faybelle try one of her special fruit experiments- she had been keeping her fruit experiments a bit of a secret, and secrets between girlfriends was one thing Faybelle could not stand.

Faybelles stomach rumbled again. maybe just one bite… then i can just enchant it while again! Faybelle did a happy little dance, confident in her self convincing. she carefully lifted the glass and carefully grabbed the apple. it was cool to the touch, and shimmered in the soft fairy candle light. her eyes gleamed, and she took a big juicy greedy bite. the juice was sweet and carbonated, a slight strawberry aftertaste mixed with the apple juice and created an explosion of sweet flavors!

suddenly, Briar shifted in her sleep- it was then Faybelle saw what she was sleeping on, a special card, hand drawn, with Apple’s name on it in big stupid golden letters. “Apple’s shining apple, a gift for my favorite person! A special apple for my special Apple! i hope you enjoy the orchard party! love ever after, Briar.” suddenly the flavors did not taste so sweet. Faybelle felt… Faybelle wasn’t sure how she felt. but it wasn’t good. Apple. “tch, always apple with you” she glared at Briars soft pink and brown waves. Faybelle put the apple back into its glass dome, she then began to chant:

“apple shining golden white

glitter glimmer with dancing light

sleepless dreaming, slowing breath

heartbeat sounding close to death

til adoration, true and pure

heart full given to endure

and lastly, not to miss

seal their fate with true loves kiss”

the cheerhex compete- the apple went through a sort or transformation during the cheer, shimmering and glowing with a bright red, as if hot and lit by flame, and then it cooled, settling back to looking plump, white, and golden glittering- just in time for Briar to stir and wake, but Faybelle was already gone, closing the door ever so softly behind herself.

Briar, after waking from her nap and not knowing her apple was now cursed/enchanted, placed her special apple into its glass gift box and wrapped it in some de-thorned vines and flowers. now that the gift was ready, it was time for briar to get ready!

she chose some white pumps with pink bottoms, pale green lace socks over sheer sparkling tights and a denim half pleated skirt. She wore her long thorn belt and put on one of her moms vintage ivory colored silk sleeping tops with a dark green mesh top underneath. She went for a dusky pink eye with heavy lashes and lots of shimmer, hi lighting her inner eye with a bright green. Her cheek and lip colors echoed each other and she added her usual gloss. Her hair was in her usual style, and she wore her favorite tiara shades. She looked at herself in the mirror, satisfied with her styling. her mirror phone chimed- just in time.

it was time to start the orchard party.

[vivacoded]

October 1, 2023

Current Mood: neutral, a little tired, a little stressed

Day Rating: 4/10

Today, like most days, has been pretty uneventful. I spent most of today online. If I wasn't on my phone scrolling through tiktok and instagram or doing sudoku puzzles, I was on my laptop playing roblox or aimlessly clicking around. It's conflicting, really. I love having a steady routine and knowing what to expect each day, but I hate how uneventful my routine is. I suppose I could at least do something more productive online like practice writing or programming, but it's so hard to focus when my family's around — and they get worried when I'm in my room for more than an hour.

Anyways, today wasn't entirely boring. Not only was the weather nice (and it will be the last nice day before going through a heat wave for about a week) but I went out with my mom for a while. We went to goodwill first. Apparently my brother needed some new sheets for his bed. Doesn't matter to me though. I just like thrifting.

Unfortunately for me, the store was pretty crowded and someone in there was making the whole place reek of weed. That smell gives me such a headache. Gross. At least we found some sheets for my brother, and we found some DVDs for my other brother who collects them. I picked up something for myself, though I'm not sure why I was so attached to it since I have no use for it. It's a case of, from what I could tell at least, DVDs for this Chinese show. I think it's a supernatural drama — maybe a thriller? I don't speak Mandarin, so I'll have to find out how to translate it. Honestly, I just really enjoy collecting foreign things regardless of the country it's from. It makes me feel... I don't know... Happy? Happy that I have little pieces from all over the world. It reminds me that I'm not the only person on the planet, and every other person out there has lives of their own, none of which are exactly alike one another. That's pretty cool, I think.

After goodwill, we stopped at the dollar store. I picked up two monster energy drinks for myself: a strawberry and a peach. Along with ultra red, those are my favorite flavors. Ironically, all the can colors are warm colors. I wonder if I have a subconscious preference for warm colors or if I'm just looking too deeply into things.

We were supposed to practice driving today, but neither of us felt good. I think it's because we both forgot to eat lunch, so we were hungry. Either way, I'll have to do some extra practice once she comes home from work tomorrow and Tuesday. She wants me to get at least some experience on an actual road before I meet my driving instructor on Wednesday. God, just thinking about seeing my driving instructor fills me with anxiety. This entry is long enough as it is though. Perhaps I'll make a separate post venting about my driving anxiety... At a later date though. I'm going to get ready to head to bed soon. The last thing I need is to fill my mind with anxious thoughts while I'm trying to sleep.

Wow, my first entry was pretty long, huh? I guess I have a lot of thoughts in my head that I want to get out. Ending this on a good note, I'm happy that it's finally October. After this heat wave dies down, I should be feeling that cool autumn air. This is the perfect month to indulge in horror sources too. My favorite genre with my favorite season. A fantastic pair :)

[makeste]

this is pretty random and you don't need to answer it, haha, but could you share your personal hcs regarding platonic todobaku with me??? 🥺🥺🥺 i'm in need, LOL, and your takes on characterization and relationships on bnha are always so spot on, so... i hope you're having a good day/night!!!!!!!💖💖💖

thank you so much! sorry it took a while to gather all of these; my TodoBaku headcanons weren’t as immediately forthcoming as my general Baku headcanons were. but here goes. the first half of these ended up being more just my general thoughts about their relationship than actual headcanons, but I eventually steered myself back on track.

first of all, this is important to note: when Katsuki says in ch. 241 that “there’s no correlation between time spent [together] and friendship”, it’s not purely out of denial. this is something he genuinely believes, having learned it the hard way growing up. for someone who seemingly led a pretty charmed life for most of his childhood, Katsuki hasn’t actually had a particularly sunshiny experience when it comes to his friendships. all of his closest childhood friends eventually left him (Tsubasa), turned on him (Deku -- from his perspective lol. obviously this wasn’t actually the case at all, but it’s how he interpreted it, and it definitely had a big impact on him emotionally), or abandoned him (that long-fingered kid, who notably fled and never looked back when the sludge monster tried to eat Katsuki back in chapter one. like, thanks for nothing, my dude).

so it’s not surprising that all of these experiences would have a profound impact on Katsuki’s ability to trust other people and accept them as real, genuine friends. in its own way his childhood was almost as isolating as Deku and Shouto’s. it’s only since coming to U.A. that he’s started to make real friends again for the first time since kindergarten. and even then, in the case of Kirishima and Kaminari and Sero, even though I think he does consider them friends, he still isn’t very open with them. because he’s learned the hard way that that can lead to hurt, and I think he’s very hesitant to ever let himself be vulnerable to that again.

but having said all that, Shouto is still absolutely correct when he says that they’re friends. and the thing is Katsuki knows it too, but he’s just reluctant to admit it. partly because the part of his brain that processes everything as rivalry isn’t sure whether Being Friends With Shouto = Losing To Shouto (IS THIS A TRAP??), and partly because of everything else I just explained above. even though by this point he knows Shouto pretty well, well enough to be reasonably sure he’s not just gonna be another fakeass groupie who turns tail at the first sign of trouble, there’s still a part of him that’s hesitant to admit that connection is there, because doing so opens him up to potentially being hurt again at some point. goddammit. why is this shit so complicated.

meanwhile on Shouto’s side of things, this poor lil bubba never had any friends growing up to begin with, so he’s not nearly as paranoid or prickly as Katsuki is. instead, he’s still discovering for himself just what friendship is all about. the interesting thing about Shouto is that since he never had any childhood friendships, in a way, the friendships that he’s making now at U.A. are his childhood friendships. and so they tend to be straightforward and uncomplicated in much the same way that very young children’s friendships are uncomplicated. “I like this person; I am going to make them my friend.” boom. done. friendship is mad easy yo.

and he does like Katsuki! sure, his personality is a bit unconventional, but there’s a lot to admire about him even so, and they actually have a lot in common! they’re both rather introverted. they’re both very serious, and I think this is something that Shouto particularly appreciates, because jokes and idioms and playful insincerity sometimes fly over his head just because he doesn’t have a lot of experience dealing with other people. but Katsuki NEVER jokes around, and he is never insincere. he says what he means, with the exception of insults, which are 90% more bark than bite. and so once Shouto figured that out, it became very easy to figure out how to interact with him. aside from that, they’re both close with Shouto’s Other Best Friend Midoriya, they both have incendiary quirks, and they both tend towards the quiet side (yes, even Katsuki) with the occasional burst of hotheadedness (maybe a bit more than “occasional” when it comes to Katsuki’s end).

and like I said, there’s a lot that Shouto admires about Katsuki as well. he really respects how determined Katsuki is, because he himself lacked any sort of clear goals for quite a while growing up. all he knew was that he didn’t want to end up being like his dad. but Katsuki is someone who has always known what he wants, and he goes after it with a singlemindedness that Shouto is almost envious of. he’s also very intelligent and quick-thinking, and Shouto knows he can rely on him in a tight spot. he’s also honest, and surprisingly principled, and while he’s definitely not the nicest guy around, I think Shouto can recognize to some degree those same types of walls that he once spent so much time building up around himself. and so he knows that to a certain extent, Katsuki’s hostility is just a front. and I think he’s both intrigued by that, and drawn to it. because every so often when Katsuki’s guard does drop and his better self briefly shines through, Shouto can see that he’s someone worth getting to know.

anyways, but enough of my rambling about their relationship, and on to the actual headcanons. first of all, I firmly believe in my heart of hearts that at some point during all of those mentally and physically taxing weekends spent training for their provisional exam, they have each fallen asleep on the other’s shoulder during the ride home. Katsuki was actually the first to do it, and it was only for a couple of minutes, but when he woke up he was absolutely mortified. but much to his relief, Shouto never said another word about it. (and if Shouto still remembers the warm, cozy feeling in his chest during those few brief minutes when Katsuki was dead to the world, with his face smoothed out and completely trusting and his breathing strangely in rhythm with the movement of the car, and if doing so brings him a sense of calm that’s hard to describe, well then, that’s no one’s business but his own.)

anyway, so because life is Just Like That, eventually of course the reverse happened. and with anyone else, Katsuki would have violently shoved them aside without a second thought, and he was almost gonna do the same here, but then he remembered he owed him (because he really did keep his mouth shut about the earlier incident, thank fuck), and so he didn’t. for almost two whole minutes, anyway. whatever. that’s more than generous, really. meanwhile no one else knows about this except for Aizawa, who was chaperoning them that day, and took mild notice at first on account of it being unusual behavior on Katsuki’s part, but then immediately forgot about it afterwards. he was proud of them both for upping their napping game, though. he respects naps.

both Shouto and Katsuki were actually scared shitless during the test of courage at the forest training camp, and if Katsuki hadn’t been kidnapped and everything had instead gone on as normal, they would have both had trouble getting to sleep that night. Katsuki actually can’t stand scary movies or ghost stories (fyi this is canon according to the third light novel, and EXCUSE HIM FOR HAVING A HEALTHY RESPECT FOR THE SUPERNATURAL. you wanna go and get your own dumb ass cursed or dragged to hell or whatever, BE HIS GUEST). whereas Shouto has next to no experience with them and doesn’t really see what’s so scary about ghosts because GHOSTS AREN’T REAL DUH, but even he feels a little unsettled when an undead swamp girl suddenly rises from the depths and crabwalks towards them in the middle of the woods.

Katsuki has on rare occasions been so drained by provisional lessons that he goes into autopilot and forgets to pretend not to be friends with Shouto, which can result in them having completely normal conversations for minutes at a time before he eventually regains enough of his senses to realize he’s fraternizing with the enemy. this is how Shouto learned about things like Katsuki’s favorite foods, and his love of hiking. the latter is actually one subject that Katsuki can go on and on about if you get him started, and Shouto very much enjoys hearing about it and never tries to stop him.

by contrast, Katsuki never intentionally seeks to gain any new knowledge about Shouto because he feels like he already knows way more than he ever wanted to. however, this doesn’t stop him from absorbing knowledge against his will by simple osmosis, and then discovering to his dismay that he’s retained the information afterward. this is why he also knows Shouto’s favorite food in return (although to be fair, I think everyone in Japan knows Shouto’s favorite food), as well as other tidbits like the fact that he likes strawberry-flavored things (because he always gets the same brand of strawberry milk from the vending machine during their lunch breaks). he hates himself a little for both noticing and remembering these stupid little details, and would rather be kidnapped again than ever admit to Shouto that he does.

Katsuki thinks of Shouto as “Todoroki” in his head rather than “IcyHot” or “Half n’ Half”, and has to make a conscious effort to use the nicknames whenever he addresses him out loud. more and more often he finds himself forgetting to do so nowadays, much to his dismay. Shouto was pleasantly surprised the first few times it happened, but quickly stopped taking notice of it, as he’s come to realize that the way Katsuki addresses people carries very little meaning regardless, since something like 75% of his actual feelings are conveyed through his actions rather than his words.

Katsuki does wish that Shouto had had the decency to choose his surname as his hero alias rather than his given name, though. he lives in fear that one of these days he’ll be required to call him “Shouto” while on duty. number one hero or not, there’s a good chance he would resign from his internship at the Endeavor Hero Agency before he ever willingly agreed to that.

and last but not least, the number one thing that Katsuki would rather jump in a freezing lake than admit to Shouto or even himself is that he actually cares about him too. and has even mostly forgiven him for wussing out at the last minute during the sports festival. he still doesn’t fully understand why he did it, but he gets that Shouto was Going Through Some Stuff, and okay yeah, he can admit that his family situation is pretty fucked up, so whatever. there’s an uncomfortable feeling he gets whenever he’s reminded of this; sort of a weird, squirmy feeling in the pit of his stomach whenever the subject of Endeavor comes up, or whenever he sees Shouto talking to the man himself. it makes him feel restless and on edge, and he never knows what to say or do afterwards, especially if Shouto goes all quiet and sullen and reflective. he wants to scream at him, or slap him on the back of the head, or grab him by the shoulders and shake him; whatever it takes to snap him out of it and ease the tension. but he knows that’s not the right way to handle it. and more to the point, he knows that he’s not the right person to handle it. and sometimes, if he’s not quick enough to squash the feeling when he senses it coming, he wonders how Shouto would react if he ever found out what Katsuki used to be like back in elementary and middle school. and he wonders whether Shouto would still be so dead-set insistent on calling them friends. and then he does squash out the thought, as viciously as he possibly can.

anyway so that turned weirdly angsty towards the end whoops. not even sure what happened there, since this is supposed to be my cute and funny ship, while BakuDeku greedily hogs all the angst for itself! lol my bad. but don’t worry, they still love each other, and Shouto is still fond and soft and equipped with bullshit-radar, and Katsuki is still rabid and in denial and a dumbass.

[psychosuna]

a/n: kinda fluffy and a bit boring these r just my self indulgent thoughts ,, feel free to send rqs

daichi: makes the same breakfast every morning. eggs and toast and some sort of protein. probably drinks black coffee, adds a little cream and sugar if he’s feeling fancy. a ketchup user and abuser. “breakfast is the most important meal of the day” blah blah just say you’re capable of waking up early and go.

asahi: idk why i just see asahi as a big baby thags like incapable of doing anything for himself honestly like his mom probs still makes him breakfast either that or he has a bowl of cereal.

sugawara: pop tart man. also goes feral over toaster strudels. the way he frosts them is an exact science. coffee but it’s light roast. uses creamer, duh.

noya: really likes ego waffles. toasts like 2-3 and gets really fuckin impatient so he just eats them as the next ones are toasting. probably drinks a glass of milk after like a freak. he’s always running late in the morning but will turn into a fuckin grouch if he doesn’t eat. it’s placebo. he just thinks he’s in a bad mood.

tanaka: i see this man as a scrambled eggs type of guy. it’s simple. the only thing he knows how to cook, actually. that, and mac n cheese (same). drank orange juice w bfast all through highschool and had a coffee awakening in college. doesn’t eat if he’s running late.

ennoshita: doesn’t eat breakfast, usually just has a cup of coffee and will eat a little something a couple hours later. he’s just not hungry in the morning.

hinata: probs has a whole ass family breakfast every morning in highschool. mum cooked eggs, bacon, rice (enter traditional japanese breakfast because i’m uneducated). when he went to college he tried to keep up with making a big breakfast every morning, and succeeds for the most part. not big on coffee.

kageyama: cereal boy. goes for somewhat sugary cereals, also the type to have a granola bar or something otw to school/classes. on game days , he makes a big breakfast. also not big on coffee.

tsukishima: tbh i headcanon him eating oatmeal and i really wish he didn’t. like, strawberry oatmeal or the strawberry K cereal is really just his favorite. coffee expert, really picky about the grounds he uses and the way he makes it. takes pride in his morning coffee. he can go without eating but he truly cannot go without coffee.

yamaguchi: pretty baby probably just eats a bowl of cereal or something. he doesn’t think too much about it but also tends to not skip breakfast. sometimes tsukki will bring him a coffee , but he doesn’t make it on his own.

kuroo: foggy area here. usually skips breakfast, always makes the coffee right when he wakes up but sometimes forgets to make a mug or a coffee to take with him to classes. sometimes he just randomly wakes up at the crack of dawn and makes a huge ass breakfast. he’s not used to eating a big breakfast, so when he does, it tears his stomach up.

kenma: he was up playing games and snacking all night. he’s full from the cosmic brownies and monster energy drinks he had at 4am before he ultimately crashed. and if he does have breakfast, it’s probably some sugary ass cereal. get some proper sleep, freak.

lev: probs has like a typical russian breakfast honestly, he grew up w it and still makes it to this day. a typical bfast for him is fried eggs with kolbasa and dill on top. family recipe type kid. this is only when he can be fucked to make it, though.

oikawa: motherfucker makes smoothies for breakfast. not even the protein shake types, like the fruity ass spinach ass types of smoothies that probably have more sugar than anything else in them. he’s thinks he’s eating “clean.” also stops by a starbucks or soemthing every morning bc he likes the complicated ass coffees rather than just making his own.

iwaizumi: i see him actually like, enjoying making breakfast. his go-to is a quick breakfast burrito. on weekends, hes a whore for chicken and waffles. probably uses a lot of hot sauce. definitely drinks black coffee he has big dick energy

matsukawa: skips breakfast entirely. literally cannot be fucked. if he eats in the morning, he goes to mcdonalds. mans never fucked with coffee, either. i’m telling you guys, he’s got a big dick, but this is one sketchy mfer.

hanamaki: really likes bagels. everything bagels with a shit ton of cream cheese. coffee with a tiny bit of cream and sugar. he’s classy. he’s perfect. i adore him.

bokuto: his mom always told him that breakfast is the most important meal of the day and why would he doubt her ? he makes the birds eye egg thinf with the hole in the bread and then puts in the pan and cracks the egg in the whole. you guys know what i’m talking about. another ketchup user and abuser but i’m less mad bc, cmon, it’s bokuto!

akaashi: this mfer. THIS MFER. i adore him truly. wait for it... greek yogurt. he gets the tubs of greek yogurt, sometimes the honey flavored kind, and will cut up fruit and put granola on top, and has espresso. he’s just. so sexy honestly.

tendou: always making something weird to be fucking honest. liek the motherfucker never skips breakfast, but he’ll straight up eat left over takeout from the night before at like 7:30am. what’s wrong with him. tries homemade pancakes every once in a while and they aren’t even that bad, he just puts WAY too much syrup on top.

semi: will have one cup of black coffee and that’s literally it.

ushijima: has the same thing every single morning. he never switches up. protein shake (black coffee in the shake), one fried egg, two pieces of bacon. it’s the perfect combo why would he ever even need to change it?

goshiki: tbh this mfer is always in a rush in the mornings but u know what. two pieces of toast and grape or strawberry jam. he’s a lil jam on toast cutie tell me i’m wrong. i’d die for him.

osamu: if he doesn’t have time to cook, he won’t eat. he doesn’t see the point in eating pre packaged shit. he wants to really get in the kitchen and make something. poor baby just wakes up late sometimes.

atsumu: if osamu doesn’t have time to cook, he won’t eat. fiend ass motherfucker. don’t get me wrong, i love him, but he’s so fucking annoying. will smell food and walk in the kitchen like “what’s for breakfast lil bro?” and osamu is all like “nothing for you dipshit” but he always gives in and feeds the mfer

suna: nothing. like. ever. he forgets. doesn’t have a big appetite and he can’t cook for shit unless it’s edibles so he just doesn’t bother. a coffee addict but refuses to tell anyone.

kita: a nice ol mug of fresh coffee, maybe some eggs, maybe some sausage, whatever he feels like! tries to eat every morning bc he knows it’s for the best. is a morning person so it’s not like he doesn’t have time!

terushima: a monster and a protien bar. likes the coffee flavored monsters in the morning , though. cheese toast on occasion.

sakusa: black coffee, two splendas, avocado toast. he’s got taste.

˚₊·͟͟͟͟͟͟͞͞͞͞͞͞➳❥ ꒰ ⌨︎ ✰ thank u for reading! | ೃ࿔₊•

[heresathreebee]

Strawberry Soda

Marvel's Ava Starr x Reader

Summary: the 'reformed' SHIELD assassin that's been visiting your favorite self help minimart is really cute. 

Masterlist Next

Warning(s): +13 | no-snap AU, post-Ant Man and the Wasp. Flirt (?), gender neutral reader, Ava did nothing wrong and is therefore in no need of reformation/redemption.

Author's note: I tend to write with black, poc and afab characteristics in mind, but if the gender-neutral and racially-ambiguous boots fit, feel free to wear 'em! Absolutely no editing went into the making of this fic so please enjoy responsibly

She's been coming here for a month and you can't stop looking. Always with her hood up or a hat obscuring her face, but she could never truly hide eyes like that. All your life, you've never given weight to the world's obsession with light eyes. Maybe it was in small part jealousy as a result of your upbringing, but it was also that there was more to a person than their eyes. This woman just might have changed your mind. 

Not the color of them necessarily (it was a jumble of not quite green and not quite grey, you think it changed with their surroundings). No, it was the sharpness, the intensity, like ice and fire in them. They had never landed on you, but everywhere they landed and every time they landed somewhat close to you, you felt panic sweep up your body from your toes to your stomach. And every time she turned away, you realized you were holding your breath and you hear that Art Garfunkel song playing in your head. 

Yeah, you might have a slight crush on her. 

Every time Bright Eyes comes in she does the same thing. She plucks a bag of sour gummy worms from the rack and pockets them. She goes to the back wall and assesses the many drink types and flavors in the fridges. Picks something, pays for it, then leaves. 

You are by no means shy, and she's not the only person you've observed in this store. And yet you're still working up the nerve to say something to her (code for debating if you should even say something at all), and you've spent too much time observing and debating that you feel like a bit of a creep at this point. 

Today (or tonight? It was still pretty early) she's actually in your way. Most people seem to steer clear of one another in here, never ever engaging another person unless absolutely necessary, and here you are, awkwardly watching her select her drink of the day. And she's in no rush either; you can see her bright eyes scanning lazily the rows of monster, budlight, snapple, and redbull. She's never seemed quite taken by sugary sodas, however– 

"Here," you hear yourself say as you reach around her. You've been up all night and need a boost to keep you going just a little bit longer before you crash for the day. You pluck the strongest red bull you could see and an additional glass of pink liquid. 

"This is strawberry soda," you advised, "it's not American so it's got less carbonation and sugar content in it," 

You rasp and press the cool glass of Ramune into her hand and your sleep addled brain cannot help but remark on how soft her skin is. 

"Thank you." For a second you fear that you said that last part out loud, and you are momentarily distracted by her accent, and then when you part your lips to apologize, the drag of your skin alerts you that she was probably thank you for the drink. 

You try to hum in acknowledgement but it comes out more like an embarrassing grunt (she is smiling at you at least). That's when you realize her eyes are on you. Bright Eyes is looking directly at you… and yet you feel none of the apprehension you felt from before. 

"My pleasure." You walk with her to the self-help counter where she enters in the Ramune, the gummy worms, and the red bull. She locks eyes in a gentle glare as if to say 'don't you dare argue' so of course it sends a thrilling shiver through your body and you let her buy your drink for you. 

There's this momentum going, it's your first conversation with her and you're not ready for it to end. Unconsciously, you crack open your red bull and chug it. Maybe the bitter tangy beverage will help you to think of something to say. 

You're in luck when instead of starting to leave, Ava looked over the unusual instructions for opening ramune bottles. You watched her read, then examine the top, then read again and look to you with mild confusion. 

"I know," you say sympathetically. "I can show you if you like?" 

She hands you the drink and watches you with calculating coolness. You pop the center cap out, flip it and just for dramatic effect, slam a fist to pop the glass marble into the top chamber. "Violá," you sing. 

Ava takes the glass and a small sip. You watch the marble roll at the opening, too large to escape and more of a hindrance to your notorious chugging method of consumption. You're rambling about it before you realize. 

"I think it's supposed to keep it mixed, or possibly force you to drink it slower. You know, savor it a little bit. Not my style, but I do think the marble is fancy. I just wish it was easier to take out, I'd have a hundred." 

Bright Eyes chuckled, nearly spitting out the pink drink and having to cover her mouth with her hand. "That so? Hmm." 

She seemed exactly as reluctant to end this interaction as you were. You stepped out the door onto the sidewalk together (you hold the door open, of course). Neither of you quite knows how to move on and you're a little relieved to see your feelings reflected in her eyes. 

You offer your name. "I come here all the time, nobody's ever offered to buy me a drink, so, thank you." 

"I'm… Ava," she stutters. "I'll, uh, see you around then?" 

"I sure hope so." You look up the street and find the city street beginning to come alive as people commute from home to work, and when you turn back, Ava presses something cold into your hand as she says goodbye. You don't look at it until she disappears into a sea of dog walkers. Your brow furrowed in confusion as you rolled the glass marble in between your fingers. "How did she…?" 

Someday you'll have a glass jar full of them. 

Next

[kayliemusing]

42: top 3s

1: Top 3 ice cream flavors - classic vanilla, birthday cake/birthday batter, bubblegum

2: Top 3 Disney Movies - Mulan, Onward, Soul (but this changes frequently lol)

3: Top 3 vacation destinations - I've never been outside of my home country so I'll say my top 3 DREAM destinations: NYC, Hawaii, a random countryside in either France or the UK

4: Top 3 places to shop - Dynamite, Sephora, Winners/Homesense

5: Top 3 subjects of study/classes to take - English/anything creative writing related, Interior Decorating/Design, Communications?

6: Top 3 make up products - YSL Touche Eclat Foundation, literally any Mac Lipstick but it has to be matte, & Fenty Beauty contour stick

7: Top 3 music artists - Taylor Swift - Of Monsters and Men - The Lumineers

8: Top 3 spices/herbs - Cinnamon - Nutmeg (literally tastes like autumn) - Paprika

9: Top 3 drinks - Diet Coke - Hot Chocolate - Vanilla Bean Frappe

10: Top 3 apps to use - Instagram - Pinterest -iBooks

11: Top 3 months of the year - May, October, December

12: Top 3 clothing items - My black/white turtle neck, high waisted jeans, plaid blazer

13: Top 3 binge perfect tv shows - Bones, Supernatural, Brooklyn Nine Nine

14: Top 3 romantic dates - (I've never been on a date but if I had, it would be this) Evening walk, late night drive, late night coffee date (tbh anything at night feels romantic)

15: Top 3 kinds of flower - Water lilies, cherry blossoms, roses

16: Top 3 christmas movies - A Christmas Carol (2009), Home Alone, The Polar Express

17: Top 3 OTPs - Nesta and Cassian from ACOTAR series by SJM, Manon and Dorian from Throne of Glass series by SJM, Casteel and Poppy from From Blood and Ash series by JLM.

18: Top 3 quotes to describe your life - "I write not to find, but to leave" by Scherezade Siobhan - "I want to be myself again. I want to be six. I want to stop knowing everything I know" by Catherynne M. Valente - "The truth is, I pretend to be a cynic, but I am really a dreamer who is terrified of wanting something she may never get" by Joanna Hoffman.

19: Top 3 characteristics you love about yourself - my kindness bc it's not surface level kindness, but actually something deeply rooted within me - my resilience even tho sometimes it doesn't feel like resilience - my loyalty bc it is a hard as steel kind of loyalty

20: Top 3 kinds of candy - Maltesers, Kit kats, smarties

21: Top 3 ways to exercise/ be active - Walking, dancing, mowing the lawn/shoveling the sidewalk

22: Top 3 spirit animals - wolf, hummingbird, tiger (i googled it bc i didn't know and i was scared it was a joke but)

23: Top 3 petnames - I like 'lovebug', 'love', 'sweetheart'

24: Top 3 books read outside of school - The Hating Game by Sally Thorne, A Court of Silver Flames by Sarah J Maas but viewers discretion is advised, Crush by Richard Siken

25: Top 3 most used websites - Youtube, Tumblr, Pinterest

26: Top 3 people you last texted - my mom, my bestie megan, and my sister bc they're the only people i text...

27: Top 3 hashtags you use - the only time i use hashtags is if i'm trying to promote some of my writing so I'll usually use writingcommunity, writersonig, poetryonig lol

28: Top 3 instagram accounts you follow - Trista Mateer, Griefmother, obviously taylor swift

29: Top 3 guilty pleasures - buzzfeed quizzes, early 2000s music, romance novels

30: Top 3 summer activities - Going to the zoo, long evening walks, campfires and s'mores

31: Top 3 things to draw/doodle - hearts, flowers, random swirls bc it's the only thing i can doodle...

32: Top 3 aesthetics - cityscape aesthetic, autumn aesthetic, rustic aesthetic

33: Top 3 things you'd buy if you gained three million dollars - a new car, a condo, another cat

34: Top 3 ways to treat yourself - facial, a large bag of maltesers, buying the makeup i really want but have been putting off

35: Top 3 celebrity crushes - Evan Peters, Matthew Daddario, henry cavill

36: Top 3 books from your childhood - Love You Forever by Robert Munsch, The Big Friendly Giant by Roald Dahl, and Madeline by Ludwig Bemelmens

37: Top 3 accents to hear - Australian, super poshy british accent, new zealand accent

38: Top 3 scents - Fresh rain, vanilla, sweet cinnamon pumpkin from bath and body works

39: Top 3 "Friends" quotes - "WE WERE ON A BREAK" -Ross, "Guess things were just going too well for me" -also ross, and "it's so exhausting waiting for death" - phoebe

40: Top 3 cupcake flavors - tbh I haven't tried that many cupcakes so your typical vanilla, chocolate, and Pink Lady Cupcake from Babycakes Cupcakery

41: Top 3 fruits - Pomegranates, Strawberries, Raspberries

42: Top 3 places you've had amazing pizza from - Pizzahut, Dominos, Pizza73

43: Top 3 sports teams to watch - i don't

44: Top 3 crayola colors - uh, i guess red, purple, and pink??

45: Top 3 things you hope to accomplish in college - Certificates/Degrees in Copyediting and Creative Writing, and I think simply just deeper critical thinking skills when it comes to writing and books

46: Top 3 fanfictions you've read - I read more books than fanfics, I've read a couple on tumblr but don't remember the names sorry :/

47: Top 3 people you miss right now - my dad, my best friend bc she's in vancouver, taylor swift bc she's not on tumblr anymore rip

48: Top 3 fears - Failure, Loss, not achieving anything in life/not reaching my full potential

49: Top 3 favorite literary devices - Foreshadowing is always god tier, cliffhangers although evil i love those too, symbolism

50: Top 3 pet peeves - People dragging their shoes on the floor when they walk, when you tell someone your fav hobby/music artist/interest and they immediately go 'oh I hate X!', and people who go 'you're so quiet!!!' but in a way that draws in more attention and/or makes me feel more uncomfortable like i would literally rather die

51: Top 3 physical things you find attractive - Hands, nice hair, defined jawlines

52: Top 3 bad habits - Nailbiting, picking at my blemishes oops, lip biting

53: Top 3 pets you've had/wish to have - Cats bc they complete me, I've always wanted a Samoyed, and I've always wanted a turtle

54: Top 3 types of foreign food - Chicken Chow Mein, deep fried shrimp, japanese chicken wings

55: Top 3 things you want to say to someone in your lifetime - 'I quit', 'I love you', 'you changed my life'

56: Top 3 dog breeds - Samoyed, german shepherds, collies

57: Top 3 cheesy romance movies - You've Got Mail, How To Lose a Guy In 10 Days, 10 Things I Hate About You

58: Top 3 languages you speak/wish to speak - French, Sign, and maybe Japanese?

59: Top 3 series (book, movie, television) - The Cruel Prince series by Holly Black, A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J Maas (but literally only for Cassian and Nesta), From Blood and Ash by Jennifer L Armentrout

60: Top 3 pizza toppings - Mushrooms, alfredo sauce, pineapple

61: Top 3 youtubers you're subscribed to - Game Grumps, Charlotte Dobre, Megan Batoon

62: Top 3 tattoo / piercing ideas - I want to get a tattoo on my wrist of the last thing my dad ever wrote me, a hummingbird tattoo right next to it, and then a cross on my index finger

63: Top 3 awards you want to win - National Book Awards, Nobel Prize, and maybe even Goodreads Choice Awards lol

64: Top 3 emojis - Laugh/Crying emoji, the please sir emoji that kinda gives off those puss n boots eyes, and the stars emoji

65: Top 3 cars you dream of owning - 1970s Chev Impala, tbh a cute little Hyundai Venue, and maaaaybe the 1964 ferarri 250 gt luso (idk if that name was totally right but i had to do tons of googling to find it. i don't know a lot about cars and i don't really have a top 3 lol)

66: Top 3 authors - Right now I'm really into Sarah J Maas, Sally Thorne, and Holly Black maybe?

67: Top 3 historical figures - Jesus, Anne Frank, Vincent Van Gogh

68: Top 3 baby names - Ryder, Leila, Gracie

69: Top 3 DIYs - Candles, refurnishing old furniture (i.e. my mom and i painted our wooden garbage can), and really just any type of autumn diy

70: Top 3 smoothie combos/flavors - Strawberry/Banana, Mango, Strawberry-Mango

71: Top 3 songs of this month - Happier Than Ever by Billie Eilish, Biblical by Calum Scott, and Visiting Hours by Ed Sheeran

72: Top 3 questions of this post you want to be asked - I did them all bc I made it a survey instead of an ask meme ;)

73: Top 3 villains - Regina/The Evil Queen from Once Upon a Time, Cruella De Vil, and Moriarty from Sherlock

74: Top 3 Cities you want to see - Montreal, NYC, Vancouver (honorable mention: LA)

75: Top 3 recipes you want to try - different kind of salad and/or burger bowls, Stuffed bell peppers, and homemade lemon loaf

76: Top 3 dream jobs - Bestselling author, the person who runs a companies social media accounts, youtuber/blogger

77: Top 3 lucky items - tbh don't have one

78: Top 3 traditions you have - Christmas Eve Service and if I don't go to that at least incorporating reading the christmas story on christmas day or eve, idk if this counts as tradition but going to the corn maze every fall, and whenever it's easter/christmas/thanksgiving we always have a big meal w/ family

79: Top 3 things you miss about being a kid - reckless abandon, dreaming about growing up with hopefulness and no dashed hopes, experiencing holidays like halloween and christmas as a kid

80: Top 3 harry potter characters - I've never read or watched Harry Potter rip (ok well i saw the first and second (and maybe third?) movie in the sixth grade I think) but I think I really liked Hermoine, Harry obviously and Dobby

81: Top 3 lies you were told - i don't have 3, but this one has a story but basically when my sister and i were in elementary school my sister got hit by a car and so the insurance thing was that she would recieve 10k when she was 18 and as a child i thought that was unfair so my dad told me that my sister had to split it with me when we were 18 lmao obviously that didn't happen (i think i realized that wasn't true in middle school)

82: Top 3 pictures in your camera roll right now - Pictures of my cat, one of my sister in a hilarious filter, and a picture of my rocking my TS merch

83: Top 3 turn ons - Kindness, defined jawline, easy going

84: Top 3 turn offs - arrogance, unkempt, super loud and obnoxious

85: Top 3 magazines/news papers/ journals to read - I don't read much of those so I'll tell you some sites I love for writing purpose's: there's Wellstoried, justwriterlythings, springhole.net (which is filled with generators if you're stuck and also tons of infomation and advice)

86: Top 3 things you wish you had known earlier - that toad in Mario Party was wearing a mushroom hat and that it is actually not his head, that immaculate means 'clean' before i misused that word like several times over the years, and that the one turn i always take on my way to work where i thought everyone didn't know how to drive was actually bc i didn't have the right of way rip me

87: Top 3 spongebob episodes - the one episode where spongebob and patrick find a ghost ship, that one episode where they form a bikini bottom band and perform it at a football game in a little fish tank, and the one episode where squidward has his first snowball fight

88: Top 3 places to be in the world - I'd love to be in NYC, Montreal, or Hawaii

89: Top 3 things you'd do differently - I would not have applied for RDC, similarly I should have just paid the 500 dollars to the one certificate program I wanted to do instead of overthinking it, and I wish I wouldn't have ended a friendship the way I did

90: Top 3 TV shows from your childhood - Spongebob Squarepants, That's So Raven, and Hannah Montana

91: Top 3 meals you love - Turkey Burgers, Chilli, and Instant Pot Chicken Tortilla Soup

92: Top 3 kinds of tea - i don't drink tea

93: Top 3 embarrassing moments - one time in sixth grade I tripped and fell right on my face in front of my crush, this other time like a couple years ago i opened the door to my car and only realized much too late while i was staring at this random family that it was not my car, and when i went to the gas station to get gas and couldn't get my gas lid on my car opened and this guy had to help me which was already embarrassing enough but then the gas pump wouldn't work so i had to go inside to pay just to realize i forgot my wallet and had to shamefully walk back to my car and then run back inside the convenience store and then pay and then walk back to my car and finally fill my tank.

94: Top 3 holidays to celebrate - Christmas, Halloween, Thanksgiving

95: Top 3 things to do in the rain - have an existential crisis, pretend you're in a music video, walk through puddles like you're six again

96: Top 3 things to do in the snow - Sledding, Build a snowman, shovel it even tho you don't want to

97: Top 3 items you can't leave the house w/o - phone, keys, wallet

98: Top 3 movies you'd like to see - Jurassic World 3, Hotel Transylvania: Transformania bc i'm a child, and the animation of the addams family

99: Top 3 art mediums - Writing fiction/poetry, painting, music

100: Top 3 museums you've been to - Royal Tyrell Museum, Canadian History one in edmonton lol, and heritage park in calgary

101: Top 3 school memories - Middle school dances when the popular kids would grind to the song "Low" which was always an interesting experience, in the twelfth grade at winter formal when we all shouted "SHUT UP AND DANCE!" at the same time when they played Shut Up and Dance, and the day i left

102: Top 3 things you don't/Won't miss - School, my sisters ex, 2016 bc she was a rough year yikes

103: Top 3 pick up lines - "My name is Will. God's Will.", "I'd like to take you to the movies but they don't like you bring your own snacks", "are you from tennessee bc you're the only 10 i see"

104: Top 3 sports to watch - none of them

105: Top 3 taylor swift songs - all too well - exile - coney island

[myforeverforlife]

the way to your heart.

For another anon! Chanyeol and 62. "You're not as quiet as you think you are." + 103. "Sharing is caring." (I hope you like it! 💕)

Pairing: Chanyeol x Reader

Word Count: 3,374

Masterlist

You watched with bated breath as your coworker, Minkyung, finished filling the newest batch of cream puffs. The bakery kitchen was warm from the ovens, but you didn't mind — not when fresh desserts were close by. 

"Oh my god, you're so good at this," you praised. Just as you tried to pick up one of the round puffs, Minkyung reached out to swat your hand away.

"Don't even think about it. You want one, you have to pay. Being part of the staff doesn't mean you get to eat everything." 

"Auntie won't mind," you wheedled. "And it's just one teeny, tiny cream puff." 

Minkyung sighed, eyes roaming over each bit of pastry as she tried to figure out which was the least fit to be sold. "Here," she finally said, picking up a slightly-lopsided puff and holding it out to you. 

You popped it into your mouth eagerly, humming blissfully as a burst of strawberry-flavored cream exploded in your mouth. "These are amazing!" 

"Good." Minkyung sent you an appreciative smile. "I'm going to finish decorating, then you can take these out to the front." 

At that moment, you heard the sound of the bakery door opening. The customer went the extra lengths to ring the bell on the counter, two sharp dings echoing in the air. 

Sneaking a quick look at the clock, you rolled your eyes with a smile. "Coming!"

You pushed the kitchen door open, wiping your hands on your apron. "You know, you don't have to ring the bell every time." 

The man at the counter grinned, leaning forward on his arms. "Sorry, was I too loud? I tried to do it gently, I swear."

"You're not as quiet as you think you are, Chanyeol. Sehun didn't come with you today?"

Chanyeol frowned at this. "Hey, what about me?"

"You always come here after your last class, Yeol. Plus, your mom owns the place, why wouldn't you come here? I rarely see Sehun, though." You copied Chanyeol, leaning on the counter as well. "How is he doing?"

"He's okay. How have your classes been?" he asked, eager to shift the conversation away from his best friend.

You shrugged. "The usual. I still hate the fact that I have to take Stats."

Chanyeol smiled sympathetically. "That sucks, sorry about that." He hadn't taken a math class since high school, which brought him no end of relief. As a student at K-ARTS, Chanyeol only had to worry about music. "What about your history class?" 

You perked up at this, a glimmer coming to your eyes. "Oh my god, it's amazing. We started learning about Japanese feudalism this week, and there's so much to cover." 

As you launched into what you had learned, Chanyeol couldn't help but chuckle at your enthusiasm. He wondered if this was what he looked like whenever he was talking about music, or writing and composing songs with Sehun. You and Chanyeol were in two completely different majors, and at different colleges, nonetheless. If it wasn't for this bakery, you probably would have never met. 

"Sorry," Chanyeol heard you say. "Am I boring you?" He glanced up to see you rubbing the back of your neck in embarrassment. 

"No!" he shouted, cringing when you flinched. "No," he tried again, at a normal volume this time. "Sorry, I think I'm just tired from classes." 

Thankfully, you bought the lie, eyes softening in sympathy. "Stop staying up late and gaming online. Sehun always tells me you guys play League for hours when you should be sleeping instead!" 

Sehun, again? Every time you mentioned his best friend, the envious green-eyed monster hiding deep inside Chanyeol tried to climb out. It was a juvenile emotion, yet like with every other emotion, Chanyeol felt it strongly. You didn't even think of Sehun in a romantic way, and Chanyeol knew that Sehun fet the same way. 

His mind knew better, but why wouldn't his heart listen? 

The front door opened, a familiar permed figure entering the bakery. "What are you doing here?" the woman asked, addressing Chanyeol as she kissed him on the cheek. 

"Hi, Mom. Just keeping Y/N company." 

"Hi, Auntie." You waved at Chanyeol's mother. "I didn't know you were coming in today?" 

"Yoonha called out sick, and I know that the neighborhood kids usually come here after school. I didn't want to leave you here by yourself," Chanyeol's mom said. She let herself in behind the register, searching for a clean apron. 

"You didn't have to," you said. "I can stay longer, if you need me to." 

She waved this off, tying the laces of her apron around her waist. "Don't trouble yourself. You're a college student, you need all the rest you can get. Dowon will be coming in half an hour earlier anyways, so we'll be okay." Chanyeol's mom left for the kitchen, the door swinging shut behind her.

"What time do you finish today?" Chanyeol asked.

You glanced down at your watch. "I'm off in an hour, but I have to run by the store for some more pens." A few wrinkles appeared on your forehead as you frowned. "I've used up almost all of my favorite pens with note-taking, and the others just aren't the same." 

Chanyeol grinned, amused by how particular you were with your stationary. "You wanna grab something to eat with me after? There's a really good pizza place that I've been hearing about." 

"Do they have chicken wings, too?"

"And cheeseballs," Chanyeol added.

"Count me in! You don't mind stopping by the stationary store with me, though?" 

"Of course not, I love hanging out with you." Chanyeol froze, surprised by his own boldness. But you didn't seem to notice, beaming brightly.

"You're sweet, Yeol. Now I can't wait for my shift to end! Are you gonna wait here?"

"Yeah, I'll get some homework done. I brought my guitar too, I was gonna see if Mom could take it home for me." Chanyeol reached down, picking up his guitar case from where it had been hiding out of sight on the other side of the counter.  

"I'll make sure to bring you some snacks while you're waiting then." 

At the mention of snacks, Chanyeol began looking over all of the pastries and cakes in the display cases, round eyes wide as he looked for the perfect, sugary after-school sweet.

The students in the neighborhood began to flock over to the bakery as school let out, children of all ages coming in to make the most of their free time. Most of the customers were high school students, groups of friends giggling over inside jokes, and the occasional couple out on a date. Other students came with their parents, as a special treat for a good grade on a test, or just to spend some time bonding together. It always warmed your heart to see how happy the bakery made these customers. Some of them came often, and you easily greeted them by name whenever they stopped by. The customers were just as happy to see you, always glad to see a familiar face. 

As much as they loved you, there was no denying that the neighborhood had a special spot for Chanyeol's mother. She was a social butterfly, much like her son, and was able to recall even the most specific of details about her customers. She came out to the front to help you as things got busier, seamlessly taking on tasks at the counter with you or going to help Minkyung behind the scenes. 

Every so often, your gaze wandered over to where Chanyeol sat in his corner, guitar propped up on his knees as he worked. Although there was music playing in the bakery, you could still hear the strumming of his guitar as he played with ease. Soon enough, you weren't the only one who was paying attention to him. 

Chanyeol strummed away at his guitar, pick in his mouth as his foot tapped against the floor. You recognized the chords of a Crush song, something he often played whenever he was in a good mood. As he finished playing, a few of the customers began clapping. Chanyeol's head shot up in surprise, almost identical to a meerkat. 

You joined in the applause, smiling proudly when Chanyeol looked over to you. 

His large ears started to turn red at the tips, a bashful grin appearing on his face. "Thank you," he said shyly.

"Do you take requests?" one boy asked, moving around in his chair to face Chanyeol.

"I can try." 

You watched in awe from the counter as Chanyeol took on song requests from a variety of genres. Most of them were pop songs, others more R&B or alternative. But with each request, Chanyeol managed to play them almost perfectly, only hitting a few snags a couple of times. You knew that Chanyeol was musically talented, but not to this extent. The customers were just as transfixed, many of them staying longer than they usually did. No one was able to resist being drawn in by Chanyeol's aura, by his friendliness and cheerful attitude. 

Before you knew it, your other coworker came in. You couldn't believe how much time had passed, but you were also glad that your shift was over. 

Chanyeol noticed how you took your apron off, heading to the back as you got your things ready to leave. He finished the song he was playing with a flourish, smiling at the student who had requested it. 

"It's time for me to head out," he said, much to the disappointment of some of the students. 

"Will you come play for us again?" one of them asked. 

"Definitely! I'll keep practicing until then." Chanyeol winked, packing up his things and going to the kitchen. He ran into his mother as he opened the door, barely avoiding bumping into her. 

"Are you leaving? Y/N's about to head out too," she said with a knowing look.  

"I know. We're gonna go shopping and grab some food together."

Chanyeol's mom held up a finger, turning around and going into the small room reserved for her office space. Chanyeol dutifully followed along, placing his backpack and guitar case on a chair. "Mom, can you take my things home for me?"

"Of course." His mother took out a few bills from her wallet, giving them to her son. "Make sure you pay for Y/N's food too. Oh, here's some extra!" She pulled out another bill. "And grab some more dog food for Toben on your way home."

"Mom," Chanyeol whined.

"He's your dog. After all the begging you did to get a dog, you won't take care of him?" 

Chanyeol knew it was wiser in the long run to just suck it up if he wanted to avoid a long lecture from his mother. "Fine." He accepted the money, smooching a grateful kiss to his mother's cheek. "I'll text you when I'm on the way home," he said over his shoulder as he left.

You were just saying your goodbyes to Minkyung, already changed out of your work clothes and back into your regular clothing. Chanyeol couldn't help but notice that you were wearing the hoodie he gifted you for your birthday a few years ago, the same year you came to work at the bakery. 

"Ready to go?" you asked him, moving the strap of your bag onto your shoulder. 

Chanyeol could hardly believe it — this was an outing for just the two of you. It wasn't a date, but Chanyeol still felt the exhilarating rush of butterflies in his stomach. 

He nodded, moving past you to hold the door open. "Let's go!" 

One subway ride and a few minutes of walking later, the two of you found yourselves in one of your favorite shops. Chanyeol felt out of place, a giant among the colorful pens and rolls of washi tape. It was easy to get distracted when everything was so pretty, and you were no different.

"Look at this bookmark," you exclaimed holding one up for Chanyeol to see. It was mostly translucent, covered in delicate drawings of flowers. 

Chanyeol came over to stand by you, picking up a similar floral bookmark and sticking it behind his ear. "What do you think? Do I look pretty?" 

You burst into laughter, the perfect reaction that Chanyeol had been hoping for. "Yes, very pretty," you agreed. Reaching up, you placed your bookmark behind his other ear. "Now you're twice as pretty." 

Placing his hands underneath his chin, Chanyeol blinked innocently.

"Wait, I need to take a picture of this," you said between giggles. 

Chanyeol gave you various poses, both of you finding the impromptu photoshoot more hilarious with each passing second. You hurried to find your pens before the shop employees could get annoyed with you for being too noisy, leaving with a paper bag of goods. 

"So where's this famous pizza place?" you asked, putting your purchases into your shoulder bag.

"It's not too far away. I didn't realize that store was so close to it until we were on the subway." Chanyeol switched places with you on the sidewalk, taking the spot closest to the street so that you were walking on the inside. It was a simple gesture, but it still warmed your heart nonetheless. 

Had Chanyeol always been this considerate? You had known him for a couple of years, but you only ever saw him as your goofy friend. It was strange to realize that Chanyeol could be such a gentleman as well, your thoughts drifting back to the way he had taken song requests without a complaint back at the bakery. 

"Y/N?"

You looked up, eyes wide. Sometime during your reverie, the two of you had come to a crosswalk. The light was still red, people on both sides waiting to cross. "Sorry, what?"

"Do you want to sit inside, or outside?" Chanyeol pointed across the street at a restaurant. You could see groups of people eating inside or out on the patio, each caught up in their own conversations. 

"How about outside? It's such a nice day today, it'd be a waste not to enjoy it."  

Chanyeol grinned from ear to ear, pulling the beanie off of his head as he ran a hand through his silver hair. "You're right." He nodded towards the street as the light turned green, stepping off of the curb once it was safe to cross. 

Ordering was simple, and even considering how busy the restaurant was, your food still came out fairly quickly. Your mouth watered as you looked at all the food, spicy chicken wings piled up on a plate, a large pizza taking up most of the table. Chanyeol was already biting into a cheeseball, stretching out the stringy mozzarella cheese inside. 

You soon found that the restaurant really did live up to its praise, falling in love with the pizza as soon as you took a bite. "This is so good," you gushed.

Chanyeol smiled, reaching for a slice himself. "I'm glad you like it. I figured we could deserve a treat, you know, with the new semester starting and all." 

"Don't remind me," you groaned. "I rarely have time for myself, nowadays."

"Same here." Chanyeol took a long sip from his soda before speaking again. "School just gets harder as we get older, huh? I miss the times when we were young and we just had to turn in a packet at the end of the week." 

"Now it's just endless amounts of assigned readings and papers. And making music, in your case. What's it like this semester?"

"I did a lot of acoustic music last semester, but someone I worked with let me try out his electric guitar and god, it was awesome. The way it feels just to hold one of those, Y/N, it's insane. We've been trying to write a few songs together." Chanyeol grabbed a piece chicken, taking a huge bite out of the small wing. 

"With your senior, right? The lizard guy, Gecko?"

Chanyeol choked on his food, coughing as he reached for his water bottle. He gulped down half the bottle in a flash, eyes still sparkling with mirth. "Gaeko," he corrected with a laugh. 

"I was close!"

Chanyeol nodded, a smile tugging at his lips. "I gotta call him that next time — Lizard Guy." 

"No," you pleaded, shoulders slumping. "You know what I meant. Anyways, didn't you work with him before too?" 

To your relief, Chanyeol went along with your attempt to brush off your misunderstanding. "Yeah, Sehun and I worked with him before. He's really — he lives, breathes, eats music. I've never seen anyone as passionate about music as him."

"Wow." You lifted your eyebrows, clearly impressed. "I already thought you were like that. No wonder you two get along together." 

The rest of your meal passed by as you and Chanyeol talked about other things on your mind. From talking about Chanyeol's latest compositions and favorite songs, to your anthropology class and latest drama you were binge-watching, there wasn’t a dull moment in between. There was never a boring moment with both of you, even in lazy, restful times like this.

"Ugh, I don't think I can eat any more." You leaned back in your seat, both hands on your stomach.

"We have one slice still. Someone's gotta finish it." Chanyeol wiggled his eyebrows, pushing the slice closer to you.

"Fine, but only if you help me out — sharing is caring." You ripped the slice in half, leaving the other piece for Chanyeol.

"Does this mean you care about me?"

You paused, the pizza slice halfway to your mouth. "Of course I do, Yeol." 

Chanyeol brought his elbows up onto the table, thumbs fiddling with each other as he mustered up the courage for his next words. "Uh, I have a performance coming up in a few months. Sehun and I are gonna perform some songs that we've been working on since summer. Do you want to come?" 

"Yeol, I'd love to! I'll be there, no matter what." 

Your friend cleared his throat, suddenly finding it hard to look you in the eye. "I mean as a date. But it doesn't have to be," he tacked on, worried that you'd be scared off. He took a brave peek at your face, noticing how you were shocked into silence. 

"A date?" you repeated. Your breath started to quicken as it finally started to make sense — Chanyeol had been acting weird around you because he liked you. The revelation made your heart race.

Chanyeol nodded, chewing on his lips as he waited for your answer. 

"Okay," you replied, completely taking him off guard. 

"Really?!" Chanyeol's voice boomed, garnering the attention of a few customers close by.

"Yes," you said with a laugh. "It's a date, Yeol." 

He stretched his hands out high into the air, a relieved smile on his face. "Oh my god," he breathed out. "This is great." 

"Chanyeol, people are starting to look." You trued to hide your face with your hands, unable to stop yourself from giggling.

"Let them look! I'm going on a date with Y/N!" His happiness was infectious, quickly taking over you as well and leaving a warm, fuzzy feeling in the pit of your stomach. 

Chanyeol gobbled up the last piece of pizza left for him, and paid for the bill without letting you pay for a single cent. It was still light out, but the streetlights were just beginning to turn on. 

"I'll walk you home," Chanyeol announced, proud to have the honor of doing so.

"Are you sure? Your mom will worry if you're home too late." 

"I'll let her know, don't worry." Chanyeol started walking, hands tucked into the pockets of his jacket.

You hurried to catch up to him, your bag bumping into your hip. Once you were by his side, you wrapped an arm around his. 

Chanyeol jumped slightly at the sudden contact, smiling shyly as he realized it was you. One of his closest friends, his longtime crush, and now the possibility of something more. 

Somewhere, after years of getting to know you, he had found the way to your heart.

A/N: this was very loosely inspired by exo-sc’s “rodeo station”! It’s definitely one of my favorite tracks off the album! I figured a couple of college kids would probably hang out around smaller, more casual places than a luxury department store like the apgujeong galleria haha, but I really love getting to write college chanyeol who’s loved by his neighborhood. also, I was eventually going to write sehun in during his performance with chanyeol, but the fic was already at 3k+ words, so I had to stop myself 😂

[dragonnan]

This is faaaar from a complete list and will be spotty at best but I’ve been pondering MCU characters a lot as I’ve been getting slowly back to work on my mega-fic.  I LOVE minor head canons.  Simple stuff like favorite foods or what music they listen to or were they ever a smoker or whatever whatever.  So I’m gonna give myself the challenge of crafting some head canon and anyone else is very welcome to dive in! (some things are already established via canon)

~ Ethnicity ~ Faith ~ Smoker ~ Alcohol ~ Favorite food ~ Favorite cookie ~ Favorite animal(s) ~ Favorite music ~

Tony Stark:  Ethnicity: Mixed European-American-Jewish (he refers to himself as a “mutt”) Faith: “No thanks” being the initial answer but if he feels like opening up he’ll admit to believing there’s likely “something” out there but at the same time figures that “something” stopped caring about humanity a long long time ago.  Smoker?  Never liked cigarettes but smoked a few cigars when he was younger due to Obie’s influence.  He never was a big fan but wanted to fit in with his mentor.  Alcohol: Influenced both by his father and Obie, Tony started drinking hard liquor semi-regularly as young as 14 (his Dad let him try his first sip at the age of 6).  He pretty much sticks with Scotch or Bourbon but is not opposed to cheap beer at a ball game.  In fact the cheaper the better - a requirement for any self-respecting American.  Favorite food: hot dogs.  Neither one of his parents cooked.  Breakfast and lunch were whatever whenever for all three of them but dinner? You better be sure you were at that table before the plates were set down or you could go without (and Tony got a slap from his father when he’d observed that rule only seemed to apply to him).  But on the nights he was sent to his room, Jarvis would slip upstairs, later, with a sandwich or, on really rough nights, a couple of hotdogs.  Favorite cookie: Those Christmas wreath ones made with cereal and marshmallow with the cinnamon candies.  Favorite animal(s): he likes all animals but if he had to pick one for a pet he’d get an iguana.  Favorite music: well duh lolol.   

Stephen Strange: Ethnicity: Mixed European-American (borrowed from Benedict Cumberbatch’s ethnicity and adding the American) Faith: Originally atheist but now closer to Buddhist.  Smoker:  Never.  Even prior to becoming a sorcerer he has always been conscious of what he takes into his body; especially given the history of cancer on his mother’s side of the family.  Alcohol:  Wine, occasionally, though he isn’t really a social drinker per-say.  Favorite food:  The spicy shrimp and pork dumplings from a Thai place in Midtown.  Favorite cookie: Hmmm.... not a big sweets guy but he won’t turn away a few ginger-pecan cookies with coffee.  Favorite animal(s): dogs - unequivocally.  He had a border collie growing up on his family farm in Nebraska.  Favorite music: please don’t make this poor man actually have to choose.  

Steve Rogers: Ethnicity: Irish (as per comics) Faith? Irish-Catholic (as per the comics).  Smoker? Prior to the serum there was no way he could safely do so with his health issues.  After he started traveling with the performers all of the girls in the group smoked and he tried it out a few times but never developed a taste for it.  Alcohol: he drank A LOT - easy enough to do as it never had any real effect on him.  He enjoys scotch and bourbon (a taste he picked up from hanging around Howard Stark).  Steve seems to low-key always have the munchies (like most enhanced) and once Tony picked up on that there are always a variety of snacks scattered here and there throughout the compound (also of benefit for Bruce, Peter, Thor, and, later, Bucky).  Steve’s favorite foods typically remind him of his mother’s cooking.  While they’d never had much (especially after his father died) his mom could do a lot with limited supplies.  She used to make a fantastic meat pie with ground beef or tongue.  He hates SPAM.  They ate it in the Army, constantly, and just the smell will occasionally send him back to those days and not in a good way.  Favorite cookie?  Oreos.  He can clean up a family sized pack in like 10 minutes.  Steve loves animals but is especially fond of horses and dogs.  There was a dog in his unit in WW2 and Steve, like most of the other men, would share bites of his rations with it.  Steve is nostalgic about music from the 40s but finds that 70s rock really resonates with him.      

Bucky Barnes: Ethnicity: Romanian-American (borrowing a little from Sebastian Stan’s ethnicity) Faith? Possibly agnostic.  Smoker? Heck yes - both cigarettes and cigars.  Like Steve, the serum he received (via Hydra’s experimentation) means he gets to dodge the detrimental side effects of smoking.  Alcohol: He likes to drink but is almost exclusively a beer drinker.  He has a big appetite but refuses to eat around others if he can at all help it.  His favorite food is corned beef with cabbage.  Steve’s grandmother was an Irish immigrant and would make it every Sunday before the war impacted rations.  Since both Bucky’s parents were dead he’d often have dinner with his best friend.  Also, unlike Steve, he actually likes SPAM.  But then, arguably, he isn’t terribly picky about food in general.  Favorite cookie: molasses.  Favorite animal(s): birds - eagles in particular - though he doesn’t look too deeply at the psychology of their ability to just fly away.  Needless to say a crafty observer might spot a former Winter Soldier tossing seeds towards the pigeons.  Favorite music: He’s pretty eclectic though he shies away from anything too loud like death metal.  He finds classical very soothing.       

Peter Parker: Ethnicity: Mixed American-Scandinavian-German-ish Faith: Protestant upbringing but unsure where he currently stands. If pressed he’d say he’s “leaving his options open” Smoker?  “Oh gross!” Alcohol: “Um, too young to drink, thanks! But if I WERE to... you know, try it just to taste it there was this mudslide at one of Flash’s parties that was super good...” Favorite food: spaghetti and meatballs.  Lots of meatballs.  Favorite cookie: chocolate chocolate chip with chunks.  Favorite animal(s): NOT spiders.  And NOT birds given how many rooftops he’s traversed layered in pigeon ick.  He’d probably say cats.  Favorite music: The B side of techno rock - especially Depeche Mode.

Peter Quill: Ethnicity:  Half mixed American and half celestial.  Faith: His Dad was a god and he killed him so he figures he probably isn’t on the best terms with the Big G God should He... or She... or Them... be out there.  Look he just wants to do his thing and cause a little trouble without mixing it up with any other celestial types but if they DO wanna throw down he’d like to point out that he’s 1 for 1 and willing to rumble.  Smoker: He would not say no to a really good cigar and may have possibly lifted a case from Yondu’s stash when he struck out on his own.  Alcohol:  Anywhere any time and in large quantities.  Favorite food:  A thick steakhouse bacon burger with potato chips right on the patty.  Extra cheese please!  Favorite cookie: He’s a simple guy with simple tastes.  classic chocolate chip no frills no fuss and fresh from the oven.  Favorite animal(s):  He likes dogs - who doesn’t like dogs?  But he really likes cows.  Just maybe don’t mention the burger thing.  Favorite music:    

Thor: He’s a Norse god of legend so I figure we can forego the ethnicity/faith questions lol.  Smoker: He has never understood this human custom nor has he felt any inclination to try it himself  Alcohol: Beer, mead, and anything capable of knocking him on his ass.  Favorite food:  chili with ghost peppers.  Though nowhere near as hot as the fire chilies of Muspelheim (which would be instantly fatal for humans so its just as well).  Favorite cookie: strawberry cheesecake with macadamia nuts.  Favorite animal(s):  It’s a tossup between bilgesnipe and whales.  Favorite music:  The mighty horns of battle!  He also enjoys old school country, much to Tony’s disgust.  The story aspect of that music is what appeals to him.

Bruce Banner: Ethnicity: Italian-American  Faith: Catholic in his childhood; currently Atheist or maybe agnostic.  Smoker: He tends to avoid any substances for, you know, obvious reasons.  Alcohol: See previous.  Favorite food:  Waffles with sliced mango.  Favorite cookie: Oatmeal.  Favorite animal(s):  Mantis shrimp - “did you know they can generate so much power in their attacks that they can briefly super-heat the water up to 7,700 °C??”  Favorite music:  Indian- especially Krishna Bhajan.    

Clint Barton: Ethnicity:  Mixed European-American and Panamanian.  Faith:  His parents were both Protestant but he’s never latched on to any specific faith and hasn’t really devoted a lot of thought on the matter.  He has a sorta loose idea of “maybe something out there” but that’s all the further he’s gotten on the subject.  What he tells anyone who asks it’s that his religion is coffee.  Smoker: Briefly when he was a teen.  Alcohol:  Beer - he’s a fan of dark lager.  Favorite food:  Coney Island dogs, Pizza, and pickle flavored potato chips.  Favorite cookie:   Monster cookies with the mini M&Ms.  Favorite animal(s): Dogs  Favorite music:  80s rock and some country.

Natasha Romanoff: Ethnicity:  Russian.  Faith:  She was not given much choice when younger and was raised as “state atheist” (per comics).  In the years since escaping that life, however, she has tried to discover more about herself.  Her parents were both Russian Jewish and there has been a pull to discover more about that faith - especially since meeting Wanda - who is Jewish.  Smoker:  No.  Alcohol: Some vodka - that’s a given.  But she actually prefers wine; and honestly her favorites are wine spritzers.  Favorite food:   Favorite cookie: Krumkake filled with creme and berries.  Favorite animal(s): Favorite music:  Overall she listens to a pile of little-known bands and whomever is playing at whatever bar in whatever city she happens to be in.  She also is a huge fan of old school Spice Girls.

[great-jenna-bake-off]

Season 3 Episode 7: Jam Doughnuts

Over the course of this challenge, it so rarely happens that I’m presented with a technical challenge bake that I’ve actually heard of, let alone one I’ve eaten on multiple occasions. So I felt pretty confident going into this week’s bake of Paul Hollywood’s jam doughnuts (although I suppose I’d sound pretty silly ordering a JAM doughnut in an American bakery instead of a JELLY one). Still, this bake presented a few challenges. First, doughnuts are made with a yeasted dough, and I still don’t have a ton of experience baking with yeast, although I’ve picked up quite a bit over the course of this blog. Second, these doughnuts would need to be fried, and I’ve never personally deep-fried anything. But armed with Wilson’s Dutch oven, I felt pretty confident that I would be able to figure it out and not burn myself too horrifically with boiling oil.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/jam_doughnuts_90953

I love a recipe that starts off by dumping all the ingredients into one bowl, so I felt we were off to a good start here.

A big ol’ doughnut batter soup.

I used my hands to mix all the ingredients together until they formed a dough, which turned out to be incredibly sticky.

Got my dad to help with photography on this one.

Next, I added some more water and kneaded the dough in the bowl, at the end of which the dough was still extremely sticky.

Unfortunately I left my Kitchenaid stand mixer complete with dough kneading hook at my apartment and had to do the hard work with my own brute strength.

But my kneading adventure wasn’t over yet: I then had to knead the dough for 10 full minutes on a floured surface until it finally stopped sticking to my hands and formed an autonomous ball.

Kneading a wet dough like this is actually extremely soothing. I highly recommend.

Now it was time for the big proof. I put my little dough ball in a bowl and went on my merry way, hopeful that it would double in size after an hour.

Before…

And oh boy, double in size it did. This was where the recipe may have started to go off the rails a bit. When I returned to my dough an hour later, it was HUGE.

I have created a monster.

I figured that lots of volume was better than no volume, but still, I’ve heard the words “over-proved” through around enough on the show to know that Paul Hollywood does not approve. However, I decided a light airy doughnut was better than a dense one with no rise to the dough at all, and soldiered on. I divided my dough into ten pieces, even breaking out my scale to try to get my dough balls as even as possible. 

Ten relatively even little doughnuts-to-be.

I then stuck my doughnuts under a towel and once again went on my merry way for an hour. But then, I returned to this…

This picture doesn’t really do justice to how huge these doughnuts were, but they were intimidatingly large.

I felt slightly like the Ghostbusters Stay Puft Man had invaded my kitchen.

Adorable, but EVIL.

I’m not sure why my yeast was so active during this bake, but it may have been because it was an unusually hot weekend here in LA, and my kitchen was pretty warm, which is conducive to yeast activity. (Do I sound like I know what I’m talking about yet?) Regardless, I had now devoted over two hours of my life to these doughnuts, and I was determined to see this thing through the end. So I whipped out my candy thermometer, dumped a ton of oil in the Dutch oven, and started heating.

Looks pretty professional!

At first, the temperature on the thermometer rose steadily, but around 300 degrees, I couldn’t help but notice that the heating seemed to have stopped. Why couldn’t I get my oil hotter than 300 degrees, I wondered? Well, when I pulled the thermometer out of the oil to investigate, I discovered this…

A crack in the thermometer just below the 300 degree mark.

So my thermometer was busted, and there was no way to tell how much higher than 300 degrees my oil had gotten. But in the spirit of the competition, I decided to make do with what I had. It was time to fry. As I attempted to separate my giant dough blobs and drop them into the oil, I understood why overproofing dough is problematic: My dough collapsed on itself the moment I tried to move it. Still, maybe it would re-puff back in the oil? I had no choice but to try.

They did in fact regain some of their volume in the fryer, thankfully.

As you can see from this picture, my doughnuts were quite brown, and that happened well before the 5 minutes on each side time limit suggested by Paul’s recipe. This leads me to believe that my oil was in fact much hotter than 350 degrees. In the hopes of not burning my doughnuts, I pulled this batch out quickly, after about 3 minutes. I then rolled them in sugar, which I hoped might hide the most egregious sins of my haphazard frying process.

I’ve seen rounder doughnuts…

For my second batch, I pulled them out of the fryer the moment they turned a perfect golden brown. I was feeling pretty good about myself until a thought arose in my head – what if these doughnuts are perfect on the outside, but undercooked on the inside? I cut one open, and sure enough, it was COMPLETELY RAW. I’m talking dough oozing out all over the counter. I neglected to take a photo because I was immediately overwhelmed with panic – this batch of doughnuts was already covered in sugar and resting from the fryer. How was I going to fix this? I decided to throw them back into the (now slightly cooler) fryer for a second fry, in the hopes that at the very least they wouldn’t be completely raw. I then pulled the mangled doughnuts back out and re-rolled them in sugar, only able to hope and pray that they would be somewhat edible.

Doughnut DISASTER.

Trying to put that particular crisis behind me, I moved on to the filling. I put some strawberry jam in a piping bag, which at least looked somewhat professional.

Ready for a jam transfusion. 

But my woes were far from over. What is the logical point from which to fill a doughnut – the top, the bottom, or the side? If you answered “The side, obviously, why would you even consider any other options?” you are a smarter person than I. In my semi-frantic state, I decided to cut small holes in the BOTTOM of my doughnuts through which to pipe in jam, completely forgetting that gravity exists and would cause a significant portion of the jam to fall right back out again.

This was SO. DUMB. 

By some miracle, some of the jam managed to stay inside the doughnuts, and I finally had something somewhat worthy of presenting to my judges. But first, would any of the bakers fare as poorly as I did for this challenge?

John clearly feels about the same way I do about this challenge. 

The face of pure excitement. 

 Ryan declares himself to be a doughnut expert – in that he eats a lot of doughnuts. 

 Good one, Ryan. 

 James, meanwhile, actually IS a doughnut expert. Apparently, he makes doughnuts all the time. 

That makes one of us, James. 

Most of the bakers are surprised by how sticky the dough is, as I was.

SLIME.

The bakers meticulously measure out their dough using a scale.

This looks far more methodical than my dough-portioning step… 

Then the doughnuts go into the proving drawer for their final proof. 

Hope they don’t stick together! 

And finally, it’s time for the “oily plunge”, as Cathryn calls it.

“Oh my great giddy aunt,” she says as she drops her doughnuts into the fryer.

Notoriously technical challenge-adverse Sarah Jane’s doughnuts are actually looking pretty good.

Look at that golden brown!

Ryan, however, is having issues. His doughnuts seem to have deflated slightly and are no longer looking beautifully spherical. 

These look kind of familiar…

Finally, it’s time to fill the doughnuts with jam, which all the bakers do from the side, because they are not idiots like me.

That jam syringe does look very handy though. 

However, even with the trick of piping the jam in through the side, most of the bakers find their doughnuts hemorrhaging jam. Guess I wasn’t so dumb after all!

The producers really went wild with a plethora of jam oozing shots like this one.

When asked to describe her progress this technical challenge, Cathryn goes with “doughnut doom,” which makes me feel slightly better about my own performance.

Been there, girl.

When the time comes for judging, Paul is far from impressed by Ryan’s doughnuts. He utters the word I am most afraid of during this challenge: “overproved.”

My fears have come to pass.

And yet, Ryan and his overproved doughnuts fare better than Sarah-Jane’s, which looked deliciously golden-brown but are in fact completely raw inside.

This is about what my second batch of doughnuts looked like before I put them back in the fryer. 

In the end, resident doughnut expert James takes home the gold, preserving his reputation for frying excellence.

These look like they could be sold at Dunkin’ Donuts. 

But now, it was time to see how much of a doughnut disaster had occurred in my own kitchen. First, let’s take a look at Paul’s batch:

Sheer perfection, as Mary would say.

And now, the moment of truth…

Not quite picture perfect. 

Okay, so my doughnut isn’t quite a perfect circle, and it’s definitely a few shades darker than a perfectly toasty golden brown. Still, it looks… better than expected? Edible? Not like a complete abomination? But the real test would be feeding them to my esteemed judges. 

***

Matt’s Review: This is one sticky pastry. Personally, I’m into it. I’d always prefer ooey-gooey syrup to hardened frosting, and this delivered in spades. I will say, there wasn’t as much nuance to the flavor, and it tasted pretty much the same throughout. But having said that… I went to take a quick nibble before taking the donut upstairs to dig in and ended up just standing in the middle of my kitchen stuffing my face like a monster. My roommate saw the whole thing. I’m not proud. Overall, I’d say this one wasn’t my favorite of the bunch. It didn’t have a perfect texture and the flavor wasn’t next level. But if you put another one in front of me right now I’d down it in about thirty seconds. There WAS a soggy bottom. I think I'm contractually obligated to comment. 

Wilson’s Review: Outside is brown, with a nice glaze. Nice and crisp, but color makes me think it’s a bit overdone? Could be the donuts were in the fryer for a smidge too long. Cutting it open, crumb appears a bit compressed. Not as airy as one would hope. Texture and taste are good, but there seems to be a slight problem with the fill - It’s not evenly distributed, which changes the whole experience. Overall, has potential, but you really need to watch that fryer.

*** 

So in the interest of full disclosure, I will say that the doughnuts I gave the judges came from my first batch, which was fried through the center the first time and were not subjected to a second dunk in the oil. I’m not really sure what the second frying did to the texture of my other batch, but they weren’t raw anymore, and I fed them to my parents and my friend Amanda who seemed to find them somewhat pleasant to eat. So I’ll consider that a good save on my part. This was not my most successful challenge to date – in fact, I’d say it was one of my worst bakes yet. However, given all the difficulties I encountered on this bake, from rapid-proofing dough to a broken thermometer to my own jam-filling stupidity, I’m pleased that I ended up with anything at all to serve, and that it vaguely resembled a jam doughnut. I guess I’ll have to just try again until I end up with a doughnut that is Paul Hollywood-worthy, but at least I’ll be somewhat confident that I can eat the rejects in the meantime.

[geist-fledermaus]

Get To Know Me!

Since I’ve received quite a few followers here and there, I might as well do this!

What is your full name?: Beryl (Sorry, I don’t like my whole name)

What does your name mean?: It’s a gemstone. 

Are you named after anyone?: My großmütter, Beryl Rae Jensen

Does your name make any interesting anagrams?: Not really?

If you had to change your first name, what would you change it to?: Fuck if I know. Probably something basic so I’m less easy to find. 

Where are you from?: North Pole, AK (I shit you not)

Where were you born?: North Pole, AK

Where did you grow up?: North Pole, AK

Who did you look up to growing up?: My father.

What are your best characteristics?: I can draw. 

What are your favorite things about yourself?: I can draw. 

Which of your parents are you closest to?: My dad.

Which of your parents are you more like?: My daaaad.

What relative was important to you growing up & why?: Tbh My dad was my super hero, he took care of me and my sister, worked 3 jobs, and took care of mom while she went through cancer. He’s the most important lmfao.

What is one thing that you’ve never revealed to your parents?: I’m Pagan.

What would your parents have named you if you were the opposite gender?: Bert Raymond... 

What is your best physical feature?: Eyes or chest. :/ 

What is your biggest accomplishment?: Being locally recognized as an artist, especially on local TV. 

What is your biggest fear?: Being forgotten, being alone. 

What is your biggest regret?: Not pushing myself even more with art. 

What is your eye color?: Various blues with inner green circles. 

What inspires you?: Other artists. 

What is the most important thing in your life?: My fiance! @boywasgirl

What has required the most courage of you in your life so far?: To not give up. To not quit college and drop everything I’ve worked hard for. 

What is your favorite flower?: Sunflowers!

What is your favorite weather?: Rainy weather and thunder/lightning storms!

Who is your favorite actor?: I have a few, but I love Johnny Depp and Jason Momoa. 

Who is your favorite actress?: F u c k. I adore Emma Stone, Emma Watson.. uhh.. Emilia Clarke! That’s just to name a few. 

Who is your favorite celebrity?: Oh fuck. Idk. 

Who is your favorite musician?: They’re a band but I love Bring Me The Horizon, Oliver Syke’s voice and lyrics hit me hard. 

Who’s your favorite person in the world?: @boywasgirl

Who are your best friends?: @armageddonne @darkdragoonxiii @vixenchildxd69-blog and my bff Alisha! 

What is your favorite childhood memory?: My sister breaking the fucking garage door like a dumbshit. 

What is your favorite color?: Black or seafoam green~ I also love other greens and blues! It’s so damn hard to choose. 

What is your favorite cultural activity?: Uh. Axe throwing? Idk what counts as a cultural activity when it comes to me and my family haha. 

What is your favorite drink?: For waking up, Monster or pomegranate and orange redbull kickers, I love mountain dew, anything with peaches and mango as well. 

What is your favorite fairytale?: HAHA. I looove reading about the Tales of Grimm. I can’t just pick one. 

What is your favorite food?: Pizza or Taco Bell.

What is your favorite holiday destination?: Anywhere but Alaska. I love to explore. I REALLY want to travel to Germany, Norway, Ireland, England, and most of Western Europe. 

What is your favorite ice-cream flavor?: Strawberry Cheesecake or Mint Chocolate

What is your favorite music genre?: Fuck. I have so many. I love a lot of metal subgenres, alternative rock, punk, old 2000′s emo bands, EDM, rap, I don’t even know how to label all of my favorites but there’s a lot to unpack there. If you’re curious just shoot me a question ahaha! 

What is your favorite physical activity?: Swimming!! 

What is your favorite quote?: “Keep listening to music because it gets you through everything, I promise.” - Mitch Lucker, former vocalist of Suicide Silence. 

What is your favorite snack?: Peach Rings, Brightside Skittles.. Uhh. MY MOM’S CLAM DIP AND RUFFLES CHIPS? 

What is your favorite song?: Throne - BMTH or Mis//Understanding - We Came As Romans.

What is your favorite sport?: Swimming, Hockey, Volleyball and Fencing. 

What is your favorite time of the day?: Early afternoons or late nights. 

What is your favorite type of clothing?: Goth/Alt fashion. 

What is your favorite way to pass time?: Gaming or drawing. 

What is the name of your favorite restaurant?: Family Diner (It’s in my town. It’s really chill and laid back.)

What is your all-time favorite town or city? Why?: I really enjoyed Denver, CO. It was filled with really colorful, intriguing personalities. There was so much to explore, everyone was so open and sweet. 

What is your height?: ... 5′2″

What time period would you love to live in?: Viking Era. 

What did you do for fun as a child?: Drawing. 

Who was a role model in your life?: My dad! 

Did you have any childhood pets?: I grew up with 5 cats and 4 dogs! 

When you were young, what did you want to be?: A mortician. 

What family traditions were important to you?: I can’t even remember many.. I loved during gatherings how we’d play Spoons, wrestle, and be reckless though. 

What was your favorite childhood memory?: Ahah! Shenanigans with my “Twin” Kyle. 

What was your favorite childhood possession?: My Gameboy Color! 

What challenges did you experience when you were young?: Almost losing my mother, trying to speak English, being bullied heavily. 

What is a defining moment from your childhood?: My mother coming home from the hospital finally. 

What do you do for fun?: Play video games and draw. I’m pretty boring. 

What are your hobbies?: Drawing, Painting, Digital Art, Gaming, Dancing, Singing.

What is something that you’re really passionate about?: My art.

What is something you could spend hours doing?: Drawing

What is something you wish you did more often?: Draw. 

If you had to watch a documentary, what would you want it to be about?: Anything WW1/WW2 related or Forensics/Serial Killer related. 

What do you always have on in the background?: Lofi Hiphop or random videos on youtube that catch my eye. 

How do you feel about travel?: Fuck yeah, where are we going and for how long? 

What is a guilty pleasure you enjoy?: Fuckin’ watching Serial Killer documentaries. 

How have your interests changed over the years?: Nah, I’m still the same. I’m pretty bland. 

Which sibling are you closest to?: My sister, Erika! 

How close are you with your parents?: Close but not too close.

How has your relationship with your parents changed over the years?: For the worse.

What is one of the most important lessons that you learned from your family?: You cannot trust anyone. Not even your own family. 

When does your family cause you to stress?: All the damn time. All they need to do is send me a text and I immediately begin to dread. 

What does the word family mean to you?: Something that I never got to fully have but I experienced. It’s also something I can create on my own accord. 

When you envision your ideal family, what do you see?: Honestly me with my partner/partners, kids, animals, and friends. 

How vulnerable is your family with each other?: Everyone is always on guard and they’ll be mean if you even show some form of sensitivity. 

What is a family trait that isn’t necessarily the healthiest?: Being a snitch, gaslighting, gatekeeping, misogyny, yelling if you even show an inkling of emotion. I could go on. 

What relatives had the biggest impact on you growing up?: In a negative way, almost all of my family. The only two I really loved growing up were my dad and sister, Erika. 

What do you watch on television?: If it’s cable I go to MTV, Forensic Files, or Adult Swim/Anything with cartoons. 

What is one of your favorite movies?: To Hell And Back, Howl’s Moving Castle, Princess Mononoke, Dracula Untold (For some reason I just really like it, don’t judge). 

If you could have free tickets to any event, what would it be?: A BMTH concert PLEASE. Or anything that’s a EDM/Rave environment. ;_;

What is your favorite form of media?: Youtube tbh. 

What role does music play in your life?: A huge role, BMTH got me through a lot of hard times. 

What is one of your favorite books?: Corey Taylor’s Seven Deadly Sins. It’s a riot of a read and makes me laugh. 

How often do you watch sporting events?: Here and there, especially at bars if they have Hockey going. 

What would your ideal weekend getaway look like?: Road trip to Anchorage and staying at my mom’s cousin’s estate in the mountains. I only got to go there a few times and the view is absolutely captivating. You can see the waters, the city, all the lights.. fuck I’d love to draw that. 

Who are popular figures that you love to learn from?: Fuck if I know LOL. 

What celebrity/musician would you love to meet in real life?: Oliver Sykes and Maria Brink tbh.

If you wrote a memoir about your life, what would it be called?: “Well, That Happened.” A memoir of a dumb bitch LOL. 

What fictional world would you want to travel to for a day?: FUCK. I’d love to just be in a simulation like the girl in Porter Robinson’s music video of Shelter. Just being in a drawing simulation where I can run around and create anything and everything around me. But if we’re talking actual worlds.. I’d probably love to be in Avatar The Last Airbender’s world. I love that series so much. 

What room in your house most represents who you are as a person?: The Office. It’s got art supplies, our gaming PC, all of my schoolwork/homework, the drawing tablets.. 

How clean a person are you?: Tbh I am pretty clean, it’s just cleaning huge messes/unpacking that I hate. 

What is a pet peeve that you have?: STOP CHEWING WITH YOUR FUCKING MOUTH OPEN. 

What behavior do you do that is most likely a pet peeve to others?: Uhh. Idk. Nail biting? Loud laughter? forgetting to turn off lights? Idk. 

What phrase or word do you overuse when you talk?: “I’m so sorry” “I m a g i n e” 

If you could only eat at one restaurant for the rest of your life, what would it be?: Fuck. Hahaaaaa. I’d probably love to just sit and eat at the Family Diner. I love their Reubens. 

What is something about your personality that you like? Don’t like?: I like that people feel comfortable running to me when they need a friend. I don’t like a lot about me, though.

What would your friends be surprised to learn about you?: I am ambidextrous and I know German/Englisch and some French! I want to learn Norwegian even more and Gaelic! 

Where do you see yourself in a few years?: West coast where it’s rainy with those that I love, pursuing my career finally after all these years of hard work. 

Thanks for reading this if you finally made it to the end! If there’s other questions you want to ask, don’t hesitate! ^^ Hopefully you learned something about me! 

[forehead-enthusiast]

A Buncha Tag Games (and yet not all of them)

tagged by: @eggyukhei mwah

tagging: this is a LOT of games so i’ll only tag @atinyphobe @nsheetee and @veonjun for the SECOND (2nd) game. if they or anybody wants to do any of the other games, absolutely go for it and say i tagged you <3 i’d love to see what you guys say!! (also, tk if you felt like you wanted to answer my questions from the second game i’d be interested to see!)

One:

tell me the first song that made you stan your current fave group and why did your faves attract you so much?

ok SO the song that probably got me into rv 100% (also yes ik this blog is 99% nct but rv is my forever fave no question) was probably ice cream cake!! i had been a casual listener of many groups up until that point and had never really stanned anyone, but icc was so infectious i found myself watching it over and over. i had heard happiness and be natural before but hadn’t really listened too closely, so icc was the song that captured me. after that, dumb dumb only cemented my love for them more, and the red is still one of my favorite kpop albums to date. rv attracted me primarily because of their incredible vocals and their versatility in genres and concepts. i still get so excited wondering what they’ll tackle next!! they’re just soooo unique and have one of, if not the best discographies of any group. i cannot stress enough, I. Love. RV!! also they’re funny and gay so. anyway stream monster once it drops uwu

Two:

rule: answer the ten questions and write your own!

1. what is your favorite song that’s been released during quarantine? ooooo honestly??? probably something off of Sawayama. literally every song bangs so hard i highly recommend that album to anyone!! i can’t pick a favorite off it but who’s gonna save you now is awesome and xs is just,,, chef’s kiss

2. what is your greatest mishap when you tried cooking? (or something you’ve witnessed) one time, while making soup at my late grandmother’s house on her like gas stove, i put a lid on a pot and somehow that led the pot to be engulfed in flames. IN MY DEFENSE i was like 7, and i’m great at cooking/baking now

3. what’s your go-to outfit or article of clothing? oh i love a nice dress. they can be casual or formal, and you look like you put effort into your outfit except i didn’t because i didn’t have to match anything yo!!!! also shorts have trouble fitting me cause i’m a weird body type so dresses tend to be very comfy for me

4. what is your comfort food? am i allowed to say like all food??? eating in itself is comforting,,, that sounds depressing but also i just like eating yummy food. i guess i’d say like my dad’s fried rice?? its my fave and no one makes it like him soooo

5. what singular moment in your life would you like to relive? i couldn’t tell if this meant like, a good moment you want to re-experience or go back in time and redo a moment and fix it. it’s kind of a hard question so i might cop out and go with a bit of a silly answer: i want to relive the hi touch with astro...... i wanna look at rocky’s beautiful eyes and touch moonbin’s hand ok,,,,

6. what is your favorite line and/or character from a movie, show, or book? i got a bunch but a few off the top of my head are genie lo (the epic crush of genie lo), ty lee, suki (atla), klaus, and ben (umbrella academy) 

7. if you could only choose one ice cream flavor and pizza topping/style for the rest of your life, what would it be? ice cream flavor: this very specific one from a local store that is banana ice cream with strawberries and oreo mixed in. it is heaaaavenly. as for pizza topping, i love a breakfast type pizza with an egg on top and like sausage and stuff!!!

8. what is the worst injury you’ve ever had or witnessed? funny enough, i’ve actually gotten badly injured quite a few times, and always on the face!! god hates me. the worst was probably when i hit a metal bench with my face and it took a chunk out of my cheek. i still have the scar! as for “witnessed” i accidentally broke a grown man’s rib once as a child, so i guess that would count.

9. would you rather explore the unknown of space or the bottom of the ocean? oceaaaan!! i answered this in some other game, but i like how mysterious and yet close the ocean is. like proximity wise it’s so near, yet there’s an insane amount we know nothing about. that’s so frightening but so intriguing

10. if you could be any cartoon character, who would you be? my first thought was literally “kirby. eat fast” GOD my followers are gonna think i’m just a glutton and they’re not even gonna be wrong im dying. but uhh idk mulan or smth?

my questions:

what is your go-to feel good movie?

are you the type of person who’s indecisive about buying, or the type to impulse buy once you see something you like?

do you prefer chocolate-y or fruity candy?

what idol do you think is most similar to you? (not your bias necessarily)

do you have any silly dealbreakers? if so, what are they?

what do you do to unwind?

what is a small thing you like to do for people you love? (be it sending memes, remembering their favorite shows, etc)

what’s/who’s your favorite myth/mythological being?

what is a non-typical pet you would want to have?

do you say pronounce data as day-ta or dah-ta?

THREE

rule: bold the statements that apply to you, italicize your aspirations, then tag nine people. 

AIR ༉⋆͙̈

i have small hands / i love the night sky / i watch animals and birds when i pass them by / i drink herbal tea / i wake to see the dawn / the smell of dust is comforting / i’m valued for being wise / i prefer books to music / i meditate / i find joy in learning new truths from the world around me

FIRE ༉⋆͙̈

i don’t have straight hair / i like to wear ripped jeans and overalls / i play an organized sport / i love dogs / i am not afraid of adventure / i love to talk to strangers / i always try new foods / i enjoy road trips / summer is my favorite season / my radio is always playing

WATER ༉⋆͙̈

i wear bracelets on my wrists / i love the bustle of the city / i have more than one set of piercings / i read poetry / i love the sound of a thunderstorm / i want to travel the world / i sleep past midday most days / i love simply lit dinners and fluorescent signs / i rewatch kids shows out of nostalgia / i see emotions in colors not words

EARTH ༉⋆͙̈

i wear glasses or contacts / i enjoy doing the laundry / i am a vegetarian or vegan / i have an excellent sense of time / my humor is very cheerful / i am a valued advisor to my friends / i believe in true love / i love this chill of mountain air / i’m always listening to music / i am highly trusted by the people in my life

AETHER ༉⋆͙̈

i go without makeup in my daily life / i make my own artwork / i keep on track of my tasks and time / i always know true north / i see beauty in everything / i can always smell flowers / i smile at everyone i pass by / i always fear history repeating itself / i have recovered from a mental disorder / i can love unconditionally

FOUR

the ultimate tag: answer whichever ones you want to because there are a lot and then tag a few blogs you’d like to get to know better! 

PERSONAL

name: sarah

nickname: bells

birthday: april 17th

zodiac: aries

nationality: chinese american

languages: english, some spanish, some korean

gender: female

sexuality: baby bi bi bi~

height: 5′10

BLOG STUFF

inspiration for muse: i suppose nct since i write for them the most?? but i feel like sometimes i come up with the idea before i think of a member so sometimes the muse is just my own fantasies oops

meaning behind my url: i made it at a time where loads of idols were getting bangs and honestly i believe most of them look infinitely better without them, thus i was and still am enthusiastic about foreheads.

blog established: like winter of 2018...?? i think

followers: over 2.5k but most deactivated/left during my hiatus lol

FAVORITES

favourite animals: sharks, chickens, snakes, cats, penguins

favourite books: the epic crush of genie lo and then iron will of genie lo, PERIOD

favourite colour: pink and purple!!

favourite fictional characters: lol, again, genie lo, ty lee, suki, klaus, ben, and just a few more: richard and evelyn o’connell (the mummy), dave (dave), michael (the good place)

favourite flower: sunflower

favourite scent: baking chocolate, heating butter, blackberry, wisteria

favourite season: probably spring! i like warmth but not HEAT

RANDOM

average hours of sleep: ugh idek i sleep horribly

cats or dogs: both, but unfortunately i’ve never had either

coffee, tea or hot chocolate: tea but then hot chocolate

current time: 5:29pm

dream trip: go to paris and eat loads of pastries and enjoy the fashions and beauty of the city, and also learn to bake better maybe?

dream job: actress

hobbies: making jewelry, drawing, singing, reading comics

hogwarts house: according to the quizzes, all of them. people who have just met me think slytherin or gryffindor, people who i’m friends with think ravenclaw or hufflepuff, people who know me really well know you can’t box a person into oversimplified archetypes :’) in my assessment of myself, it varies by the day, but i think perhaps gryffindor today?

last movie watched: hot fuzz (a classic)

last song listened to: summer breeze by sf9

no. of blankets you sleep with: like 2

random fact(s): i won lego building competitions as a child, one of my dream roles is anastasia from the musical named after her, i played violin for a very short time, i bake the cakes for all my family and friends’ birthdays, i have strangely strong grip strength

SIX

10 songs i can’t stop listening to:

love me 4 me- rina sawayama

cherry- rina sawayama

in & out- red velvet

crush culture- conan gray

manic- conan gray

the king- conan gray

summer- pentagon

told you now- jeremy jordan (originally sung by sam smith)

fuck this world (interlude)- rina sawayama

someone who loves me- sara bareilles

[phoenixrisingwoman]

1-102. You should have known I was gonna do this.

This friendship was a mistake.

1) what’s a song you depict with your childhood? any HSM song brings me back to my childhood & also oldies that my parents used to play in the house like stand by me by Ben E. King, unchained melody by the Righteous Brother,….

2) did you have a memorable childhood pet? I think every one of my pets is memorable. one that specificly comes to mind would have to be our Tervuren. We took him in because his owner didn’t take care of him and was planning on ditching him in the middle of the woods. the poor thing got treated like some kind of monster when he only asked for the bare minimum, to get treated with respect and basic kindness. I still remember how easily he trusted us. We were a family of 5 so to have 5 strangers around you all of a sudden and not get defensive and lash out especially after getting treated so badly by humans is one thing but to completely immediately trust us wow. He was such a gentle and sweet dog and it hurts my heart when I think about how he died. He had cancer. Fucking dogs man i know i say this about all dogs but he really was an angel. What a pure soul.

3) have you ever been drunk? yes

4) have you ever tried drugs? i’ve only eaten space cake and that’s it. but i don’t really have any desire to ever try hard drugs.

5) have you ever completely regretted what you’ve said? 99% of the time I regret what I say because I am dumb and say some real embarrassing shit

6) have you ever made someone cry? I hope not, unless they were happy tears!

7) has someone ever made you cry? most likely yeah i’m just very sensitive and take a lot of things to heart.

8) have you ever been in love? if so, describe the moment you knew it. i've never been in love9) which came first the chicken or the egg? The real question is where does a circle begin and where does it end?

10, 11) already answered

12.) have you ever been in love with someone you couldn’t love? read the answer to question 8

13) are you a good cook? i mean i’m not the worst but there’s always room for (a lot of) improvement.

14) already answered

15) what is the last movie you cried during? i can’t remember but hatchiko is a movie that can always make me cry.

16) what are songs you’ve cried to when you first heard them? (if any)

It’s such a long list so i’m going to narrow it down to a few: Skillet - Would It matter, DNA - Lia Maria Johnson, you don’t know - Katelyn Tarver, Adam’s song - Blink 182 , 24 floors - The Maine, Sleepless nights - Faber Drive, Just a little bit of your heart - Ariana Grande & I can’t make you love me/ nick of time - Bon Iver. That’s some real sad shit.

17) do you have a middle name? Nope18) have you been out of your country? yes, I’ve been to Italy, England, Turkey, The Netherlands and Germany & this summer i’m going to Spain.19) are you a chocolate fan or not? I am a huge slut for chocolate always20) how many people have you kissed? only one because I have no game21) already answered22) what is your dream car? don’t have a specific one in mind but a range rover looks nice. as long as my car is big enough to take all my dogs with me to the beach, i’m satisfied.23) what is your lucky/favorite number? don’t have one24) what is your favorite flower? i like water lilies a lot25) books or movies, why? Both. Depends. you can get lost in books and imagine the characters/scenery more and the words just stick with me more when i read them? But movies are also nice if a certain character gets played by a good actor and really brings it all to life.26) have you ever been on a blind date? I’d rather not get murdered on my first date. so to answer this question no.27) has one of your friends ever backstabbed you? yeah in my teenager years 28) have you ever backstabbed one of your friends? don’t really see the point in hurting a friend? If a friend betrays my trust i’ll cut them out of my life immediately and never speak a word to them again nor will i waste any more energy on them or be willing to listen to whatever bullshit excuse they want to try. I’m very loyal and loving but if someone takes advantage of that and betrays my trust then I have no problem with cutting them out of my life and continuining as if we were strangers all along. i can take a lot but i don’t fuck with fake people.29) what thing do you symbolize love with? many things really but that’s because i think love comes in many forms. friendship, hobbies, pets, lovers, family,…i think love is all around us really. a tiger playing with her cub, puppies play fighting a lil too rough with an older dog but the older dog allowing them because they still need to learn their boundaries, strangers pulling funny faces at babies or playing along with a game a kid made up, someone giving up their seat and so on. I think all of these acts symbolize love. Once you stop seeing love as this strictly romantic thing i think it’s easy to find it everywhere you look. no matter how small the gesture.30) do you have neat handwriting? It’s not too bad i think. 31) do you have a friend with benefits? nope32) do you want a friend with benefits? I don’t really think i’m cut out for that type of thing. I mean whenever someone holds the door for me i think about it for like days after so I really am not sure if I could trust myself with seeing it as only a friendship with benefits and nothing more.33.) if you could be anything in the world, what would you be? a siren, a wolf, a forest nymph, harry styles’ next gf haha34) have you ever been blackout drunk? yeah35) have you ever met someone famous? no :(36) how many concerts have you been to? uhh i think 13-ish37) which concerts have you been to? first ones were Justin Bieber (don’t judge), 1d, 5sos, ed sheeran, the script, dua lipa, harry styles, lord huron38) do you have a hidden talent? i can go trough 10 different emotions in the span time of an hour39) what do you do when you’re stressed? shut down, cry, get angry or all of the above.40) do you think money can buy love? money can buy things you love and that make you happy so i guess in that sense you can buy ‘happiness’ & ‘love’, but if we’re talking about real, true, genuine feelings then no that kinda love can’t be bought41) how old would you date? the oldest like 24 but for a sugar daddy i am always willing to make an exception42) have you ever done something illegal?  jaywalking is illegal but most of us have done it at some point so like nothing too illegal43) what is your biggest fear? for my loved ones? that they wil never get all the goodness in life that they truly deserve and that life will treat them like shit and inflict pain upon them that i’ll never be able to undo. for myself? i’m scared i’ll never truly feel like I belong and will never truly feel happy and that once I’m close to dying i’ll be faced with the fact I’ve wasted all my time.44) what is an unusual fear you have? having a doppelganger that’s a real piece of shit and people thinking it's me that has done all that nasty shit to them and me eventually being sentenced for it while the real demon is still out there...yea idk 

45) can you drive? no haha i really need to get my license46) do you believe in supernatural creatures? yes but i’m not sure to what extend but I do believe there are certain things living on this earth unbeknownst to us. 47) do you believe in karma? i think what goes around comes around. or so i truly hope.48) what is one quality you need in your partner? above all my partner needs to be kind. no matter what.49) do looks matter? i’m not going to be a hypocrite and say no because there does need to be a certain level of attraction but it’s not like looks are the most important thing about someone.50) does size matter? which size are we talking about here. but no idc if you truly love someone, you take them as they are. not a single cell in your body would even think about changing anything about them because they already are perfect just the way the are.51) who is the last person you forgave? myself for being so dumb52) what is your favorite ice cream flavor? strawberry and chocolate53) already answered 54) ever been on a plane? obviously55) ever been on a boat? yes56) is there anyone you’ve lost touch with that you wish you hadn’t? yea a highschool friend that i haven’t heard in years.57) are there any friendships you regret? yes, this one58) are there any friendships you wish you could make? yes @harrystyles if you ever wanna hang out hit me up. i am free almost always so we can hang out whenever you are free too. thanks my dude.59) have you ever stayed awake for 24 (+) hours? no60) have you ever walked outside after 12 am? yes61) have you ever seen a sunrise completely through? no but one day I will!62) are you scared of rollercoasters? yeah and i wish i wasn’t. but i always imagine some final destination type of shit when i’m on it so i tend to avoid rollercoasters and such. I’m a paranoid bitch.63) on a scale of 1-10 how stressed are you usually? 664) do you have any plans this weekend? yes 65) do you miss anyone right now? not really66) who do you wish you were talking to right now? the ghost of Christopher McCandless. I’d like to hear his stories and thoughts. he seemed like a very interesting individual.67) already anwered68) who is your favorite superhero? catwoman? idk i don’t really have a fave superhero69) are you dirty minded? me? an angel? of course not.70) what is your favorite song from every decade starting at the 80’s? this question should be illegal. how am i supposed to choose one? there are so many bops.71) how many kids, if any, do you want? at the moment i don’t want kids but if that ever changes 2 would be enough.72) who is your biggest OTP? don’t have one73) what is your favorite food? lasagna & pizza. other than that cake/chocolate/anything cookie or candy related. I have a sweet tooth okay 74) do you want to be married one day? idk I don’t really feel the need to get married but if someone is willing to marry my annoying ass then I’m grabbing that chance with both hands.

75) dogs or cats? both but unfortunately i’ve only owned dogs till now so i’m hoping that will change soon!                                                                   76) already answered77) have you ever seen a shooting star? nope78) if you had the opportunity to go to the moon, would you? No, unless the aliens are there too. then sign me the fuck up79) how many best friends do you have? 380) when was the last time you cried? 2 weeks ago81) have you ever laughed so hard you peed yourself? mind ur own bussiness82) have you ever made anyone laugh so hard they peed? yeah83) if you could travel any where in the world, where would you go? countryside of Ireland, Sweden or Northern Wilderness84) what are 3 words you would use to describe yourself? gentle, dreamer, stupid 85) do you consider yourself a loyal person? yes, very loyal until you give me a reason not to. but even then i won’t badmouth you i’ll just erase your whole existence from my memory.86) what is your favorite season and why? summer bc i need that vitamin D to beat the sad bitch in me. but also autumn because SWEATER WEATHER87) have you ever told anyone you loved them, and didn’t mean it? no, i don't easily say i love you to someone 88) do you know how to play any instruments? no :(89) already answered90) what are you allergic to? pineapple. i might have other allergies i’m unaware off.91) already answered92) if you could be any character from your favorite tv show would you, and if so, who would you be? I’d wanna be Daenerys Targaryen because I want to have dragon friends who will fly me anywhere I wanna go. also talk about an entrance when you arrive with your fucking dragon somewhere.93) if you could be best friends with any celebrity who would it be and why? harry styles, niall horan, BØRNS or Maggie rogers because they seem like fun people to be around that will just brighten your day by being in their company.94) are you outgoing? nope, unless you catch me in those rare energetic moods or if i’m drunk then I do shit even I don’t want to know about.95) have you ever wanted to kiss someone, but weren’t brave enough to? no96) are you a good flirt? probably not because i always say some weird shit and kill the mood haha97) have you ever been turned down, or have you ever turned anyone down? nope98) already answered99) are you superstitious? not really100) are you a good listener? i like to think so101) are you a good kisser? who knows102) would you kiss any of your friends? depends how much money is involved

[nancypullen]

Whew!

I made it over the grumpy hump that was in my way yesterday and spent time in the sunshine today.  It was exactly what I needed.  I checked every square inch of  my gardens and I’m satisfied with what I saw.  Teeny-tiny zinnias are popping their sweet heads up where I threw seeds so I’ve got a litter of babies to watch.  Other residents are bigger ans stronger. The salvia is going nuts and the bees are loving it.  Here’s some very blurry proof.   The only thing in focus is the stem in the foreground. Oops.  I’m out of practice.

We’ll just pretend that it’s a dreamy watercolor painting, mmmkay? The basil is thriving and promises to add fresh flavor to many,many meals and snacks.

I scattered seed for dill because I love it in tuna and chicken salads, mayo for sandwiches, on fish and roasted potatoes, need I go on?

More babies!  Of course, I’ll have to thin that once I see what I’ve got.  Looks like I’ll have plenty to choose from. I still practice the good advice I received from Sally Owens in the movie Practical Magic (a favorite!).

 “There are some things I know for certain: always throw spilled salt over your left shoulder; keep rosemary by your garden gate; plant lavender for luck; and fall in love whenever you can.”  - Sally Owens Rosemary growing by my garden gate...

and my lavender for luck is booming!

I see a couple of weeds in that photo that I’ll have to go back out and pull. Arrgh! As far as falling in love whenever I can, I do!  I fall in love with animals, flowers, sunny days, good recipes, a good thunderstorm, a good book, and with that sweet fellow that lives here, day after day. This time of year I’m also in love with the idea of nurturing baby plants into productive members of society.  I ordered some hardy blue geraniums from a seed catalog and they arrived in a tiny plastic bag, just shriveled roots.  So I pampered them and put them to bed and lo and behold, I’m seeing GREEN!

That little plant is about the size of my thumb, but there’s hope!  This one is only about the size of my thumb nail, but I’ll talk sweetly to it and try to convince it to step away from the ledge.

This patch of thyme is doing beautifully, probably because it has its own cat.

Everything is a bit messy because of the storms we’ve had the last few days.  I’ll tidy up.

Mickey’s favorite, Mexican Heather, is blooming like crazy.  You can’t kill this stuff.

This lobelia sits in a bright pot on the porch.  She’s a bit of a drama queen, always ready to end it all if her shade, water,sun mixture isn’t just right.  The southern sun is not her friend, she’s a belle.  

These poor impatiens are still waiting to be nestled into that colander.  I’ve been trying to get some coco fiber mats, which is what I like to line my pots and planters with - but I don’t want to go into Lowe’s, where they’re just $1.98, and I sure don’t want to order them through Amazon where they’re charging $14 for a pair  What a rip off.  I tried to do a Lowe’s curbside pickup but it doesn’t appear that they’re doing small garden items. Dang it.  I’ll have to improvise.

Right in front of the porch I’ve got parsley shooting up  beside a hydrangea.  Parsley always does really well in that front bed and it’s nice to go out and snip some when I need it.

Most of the perennials aren’t blooming yet, but they look healthy and happy. The front porch isn’t quite ready yet, but it’s starting to look comfy again.

Remember last fall we had the old deck torn down and a new one built?  It’s time to stain it, we just have to have a string of dry days - something we haven’t had in months.  Still, that didn’t stop me from getting it ready for summer with a pretty pink geranium.

Cheerful! I have two white shutters that I’m dying to turn into a plant stand and put over in that left corner.  It could hold some pretty potted herbs or blooms.  Something like this.

Oh, I’ve got so many plans! And speaking of making things, I’m still sending out cards.  They’re far from perfect -  in fact they’re all a bit wonky.  But the people receiving them understand that I’m a bit wonky as well and overlook my errors. I sent this one out today to a dear pal.

I sent my mom a funny card for Mother’s Day, but you’d have to know the back story.  She used to tell us that when she was a kid she was so poor she had a tumbleweed for a pet.  So I took an adorable childhood photo of her...

Front                                                     and inside

I made a card for Mickey’s mom as well.  I don’t think I snapped a pic of the finished product, but it started with this photo of Mickey and his siblings.

The message inside said “Thanks for doing an incredible job, Mom”.   Keeping those hooligans alive should have earned her combat pay! Two with cap guns, one with a baton and one with a jump rope.  That’s a recipe for disaster if I’ve ever seen one.  Anyway, I had a ball making fun cards for the people we love and I’ve got another couple in progress on my desk that will probably go in the mail tomorrow.    I’ve made a few that were PG-13 so I won’t share them here.  Don’t knock it, it’s keeping me sane. Know what’s keeping Mickey sane?  Food.  I give him things like this angel food cake with fresh strawberries and whipped cream and tell him its on his diet.  It could be worse, right?

I give him a lot of salads, so I don’t deny him the occasional treat.  He’s got a monster of a sweet tooth and sometimes an apple just doesn’t cut it.  I can’t wait until we start getting the first really good watermelons of the season.  That’s the best candy around! Alright, I’ve rambled enough.  I’ve adjusted my attitude, soaked up some sunshine, fiddled in the gardens, and made a good meal that included dessert.  If that’s not a good day I don’t know what is.  Last night’s bubble bath didn’t hurt.  I soaked and read while that big, full moon peeped through the window.  It was wonderful.  What’s that quote about the faithfulness of nature?  Whatever it is, that’s what’s getting me through.  The reliable, buzzing bee, the seeds sprouting and pushing toward the sun, and that bright moon shining down on us while the earth wakes and stretches.  That rhythm never fails us, no matter what else is happening in the world.  Thank goodness. Stay safe, stay well, stay focused on the good that’s all around us.

XOXO- Nancy

[hereeatthiskitten]

Stolen from @wagnetic

What is your aesthetic?

this book which I am linking to on amazon because amazon has some of the pictures from the inside is absolutely my exact aesthetic

What is your favorite Halloween costume you’ve done?

...i’ve worn, like, some variation of ‘witch’ for basically forever? since I was a tiny child, anyway. it’s sorta morphed into ‘vaguely goth-like dress that’s sorta halloween-y but not so much an actual costume, occasionally with a hat’. because costumes are complicated and hard and I have a pile of kids to get costumes for?

What is your dream job?

organizing lego while watching television possibly organizing other things would also work

Who is your current celebrity crush?

i meaaaannn celebrities are people, and they are people who I don’t know, and I tend to get crushes on people I know? and/or fictional characters, who are a different kind of ‘people I know’. also I’m pretty sure the more real things I find out about a celebrity the less I could possibly have a crush on them. usually. most of the time. possibly not always.

What are three movies that make you cry?

why only three any movie with a slightly sad part or maybe just an overemotional bit is very likely to make me cry I think the last three movies that made me cry were Moana, Wonder Woman, and The Lego Batman Movie. Which were. like. the last three movies I saw, pretty much. (The Hitman’s Bodyguard did not make me cry.)

What is the last book you finished reading?

The Monster At The End Of This Book

What color eyes do you have?

brown

Do you dance in the car?

noooooope never

Earrings or necklaces?

earrings with occasional non-fancy necklaces but mostly earrings. usually lego ones

Favorite drink?

tea

What is one thing on your bucket list?

look I was going to try to answer this one but I wanted some ideas and I tried googling it and WOW there are a lot of articles titled things like “summer bucket list ideas for kids” and just NO that is not what that means please stop do not write articles about what children should do before they die. which will apparently be in whenever current summer the article was written. oh my gosh people please look things up before titling articles

First concert?

willie nelson when i was 2. first concert I *chose* to go to was the Monkees first reunion tour in the 80s. With Weird Al opening. [half the questions at the weird al panel at rccc were asked by children, but 90% of the ones asked by adults were prefaced by 'you were my first concert'. it’s apparently A Thing.]

What are your favorite lyrics?

“Do you remember The taste of pemmican?“

What is your ideal weekend?

April 20th-23rd 2017

What are three things you couldn’t live without?

complaining, stuff to play with, & a person to talk to

How would your friends describe you?

Quiet, nice, helpful, slightly geeky. My friends don't know me very well.

What song will always make you dance?

no dancing

What is your favorite ice cream flavor?

mint chocolate chip or praline pecan or anything with caramel swirls in it or coffee or strawberry tagging: whoever wants to do a meme + @inconclusionray because LOOK i finished it it only took forever

[whatshehassaid]

Favorite Things

I’m bored out of my mind at.... hell, I don’t even know what time it is. 

Food and Drink

Favorite Fast Food Restaurant? 

Umm, it really depends. I like Chinese/Asian type foods and pizza and a lot of things, so... I can’t really choose one? I really love Thai Express though.

Favorite Ice Cream Flavor?

It’s a toss up between pistachio and mint chocolate chip. Chocolate chip cookie dough is really good too

Favorite Chocolate Candy?

Ferrero Rocher or anything with a chocolate/hazelnut mix

Favorite Fruity Candy?

Sour Skittles or wine gums

Favorite Flavor Starburst?

Either the pink or the red

Favorite dish at Olive Garden?

I’ve actually never been to Olive Garden.

Favorite kind of sushi?

Uramaki (California rolls)... I also like maki.. (oh boy, now I’m craving sushi)

Favorite Asian dish?

I’ve really only had Westernized type Asian food, so.. I love spring rolls, sushi (see above), chow mein...

Favorite Italian Dish?

There’s a lot to choose from there as half my extended family is from Calabria... so...  chicken parmigiana or angel hair primavera

Favorite food of all time?

There’s a lot to choose from there... I really love steak though. Like, a little too much. 

Favorite way to cook a steak?

Medium, sometimes medium well

Favorite pasta dish?

Angel hair primavera

Favorite cookie?

White chocolate macadamia nut

Favorite fast food french fries?

Mcdonalds

Favorite cereal?

Raisin Bran. Don’t @ me

Favorite breakfast food?

Mmmm, omlettes. 

Favorite pizza toppings?

Pepperoni, green pepper, sometimes pineapple.... sometimes olives.

Favorite fruit?

It’s a tie between strawberries, cherries and pomegranates. 

Favorite vegetable?

Broccoli

Favorite dessert? 

White chocolate cheesecake.

Favorite comfort food?

Homemade chicken soup

Favorite way to eat bacon?

On its own, honestly.

Favorite thing at a buffet?

I don’t really go to buffets..... 

Favorite pumpkin flavored treat?

Pumpkin spiced lattes........................ don’t start with me

Favorite dish at Thanksgiving?

Stuffing.

Favorite cake?

Strawberry shortcake... or angel cake w/ strawberries.

Favorite ice cream sundae toppings?

Hot fudge, maraschino cherries and whipped cream

Favorite thing to cook?

I love making pizza..

Favorite soda?

Cherry coke.

Favorite alcoholic drink?

Vodka coke.

Favorite drink at Starbucks?

Skinny cinnamon dolce latte

Favorite flavor coffee?

I just.... coffee? and espresso... I love espresso.

Television & Movies

Favorite 80′s movie?

Um, toss up between ET, the Indiana Jones movies (Last Crusade has always been my fave), and The Shining.

Favorite Harry Potter movie?

Toss up between Prisoner of Azkaban and Half Blood Prince in the HP series... Crimes of Grindelwald (so far) in the Fantastic Beasts series.

Favorite Hobbit from Lord of the Rings?

Bilbo.

Favorite Simpson’s character? 

Lisa.

Favorite cartoon cat?

Felix the cat. 

Favorite TV sitcom?

I Love Lucy. Does that count as a sitcom?

Favorite cartoon?

Peanuts (does that count?) or Looney Tunes

Favorite scary movie?

I’ve watched a LOT of horror movies, but Halloween (1978) hands down.

Favorite funny movie?

Hmmm... I don’t watch many comedic movies, honestly.. Bridesmaids? I don’t know..

Favorite celebrity?

Y’all really gonna ask this? We all know it’s Jude Law.

Favorite South Park character?

I never really got into South Park, tbh.

Favorite chick flick?

Um, The Holiday and maybe Confessions of a Shopaholic....

Favorite Pixar movie?

I’d have to choose three ‘cause I can’t choose one... Ratatouille, Coco, and Toy Story

Favorite Family Guy character?

Don’t really watch it. I watched the first season. Stewie, I guess?

Favorite Leonardo Dicaprio movie?

Aw, you gotta do this to me? Top 3: Titanic, The Great Gatsby and Shutter Island.

Favorite Actress over 50?

Do people who are dead count? ‘Cause I’d choose Marilyn Monroe in a heartbeat.

Favorite Marvel movie?

Captain America: The Winter Soldier

Favorite TV Show?

A tie between Hannibal and Twin Peaks.

Favorite cancelled TV series?

Hannibal. Definitely Hannibal.

Favorite show on the Discovery Channel?

I don’t really watch it all that much.... can I use a show from the History Channel instead? (Hunting Hitler)

Favorite classic movie?

Niagara (1953) or Dracula (1931)

Music

Favorite Beatles song?

Golden Slumbers

Favorite string instrument?

Acoustic guitar

Favorite instrument?

Piano

Favorite band or music artist?

I have too many so, Neutral Milk Hotel, Nirvana and Lana Del Rey.

Favorite music genre?

Indie, alternative, whatever.

Favorite style of dance?

I love the way swing dancing looks.

Favorite boy band?

Oof, ya outtin’ me. NSYNC.

Favorite disco song?

Don’t Stop Til You Get Enough - Michael Jackson or Night Fever - Bee Gees

Favorite 80′s song?

I love a LOT of 80′s music so... I can give you a few (I can’t choose one, that’s impossible): Call Me - Blondie, Take on Me - Aha, Total Eclipse of the Heart - Bonnie Tyler, You Spin Me Round (Like a Record) - Dead or Alive, A Criminal Mind - Gowan, Maneater - Hall & Oates, Smooth Criminal - Michael Jackson (THERE ARE A LOT MORE)

Favorite cover song?

Byaginc’s version of Losing My Religion - REM and I also really like Lo-Fang’s version of You’re the One That I Want.

Favorite one hit wonder?

Sex and Candy - Marcy Playground

Favorite song you’re embarrassed to like?

Ummmmm.. if I have to pick one.. Irresistible by Jessica Simpson (also the version with Lil Bow Wow is a banger?)

Favorite foreign band/artist?

Catatonia (does that count, I mean, I’m not Welsh.. so). I also like Pink Floyd.

Travel & Recreation

Favorite state you’ve visited?

I’ve only visited one state in the US and it was Florida.

Favorite country you want to visit?

Italy or England

Favorite thing about America?

If you’re referencing the US, I live in Canada, so... I don’t know?

Favorite kind of vacation?

I love beaches... but I also love art and architecture so *shrug*

Favorite car?

1950′s VW Beetle. 

Favorite road to drive on?

I don’t drive.

Favorite way to travel?

Car, I hate planes.

Favorite beach?

I haven’t been to many honestly.

Favorite place to go with family?

DISNEY WORLD.

Favorite vacation you’ve taken?

The first one I ever went on to Universal Studios in Orlando.

Favorite fictional place you’d want to visit?

Hogwarts, let’s be real.

Favorite ride at a carnival?

Those swing carousel things.

Favorite thing to do at the beach?

.....read

Favorite rollercoaster?

I do nOT do rollercoasters.

Favorite theme park?

Disney DISNEY D I S N E Y

Favorite thing about traveling?

I love nice hotels, I don’t know why that’s my fave part, but it is.

Nature & Animals

Favorite dinosaur?

Um, I’ve never really thought about that? T-Rex, I guess?

Favorite breed of dog?

Poodle.

Favorite season?

Autumn

Favorite flower?

Hiscibus

Favorite animal at the zoo?

Elephants... if they have them or pandas

Favorite type of bear?

Panda bears

Favorite natural disaster?

....what kind of question is that?

Favorite reptile?

I love snakes.

Favorite animal?

Tie between cats and sloths.

Favorite bird?

Owls.

Favorite thing in the sky?

The moon.

Favorite thing about a rainy day?

Hearing rain on the roof.

Favorite sea creature?

Can I say the Loch Ness Monster? (haha) Jellyfish.

Favorite color rose?

Light pink or dark red.

Favorite small mammal?

KITTENS!

Favorite big cat?

I love snow leopards. 

Favorite thing about spring?

Flowers.

Favorite wild animal you’d like as a pet?

A sloth.

Sports

Favorite sport?

Soccer

Favorite extreme sport you're too scared to do?

Does snowboarding count?

Favorite Olympic sport?

Figure skating.

Favorite football team?

Don’t watch American football.

Favorite basketball team?

Don’t really watch that either.

Favorite hockey team?

I know I’m Canadian, but I’m honestly not that invested. I’d choose the Maple Leafs ‘cause I’m from TO, but they’re.... aw f ul.

Favorite baseball team?

Blue Jays

Favorite sport to play?

Soccer.

Favorite winter sport?

I do not do winter sports. I’m a klutz as it is.

Favorite sport you wish you were a pro at?

Figure skating would be AMAZING.

Favorite professional athlete?

Serena Williams, Evgenia Medvedeva

Favorite sport to watch in person?

Hockey.

Childhood

Favorite nursery rhyme?

Didn’t really have a favorite.

Favorite childhood memory?

My grandfather. 

Favorite board game?

Monopoly or Scrabble

Favorite children’s show?

I looooooved Looney Tunes. I still do, honestly.

Favorite toy as a child?

I had a Barney the Dinosaur plush (I had Barney everything)

Favorite teacher?

My sixth grade teacher was a pretty cool dude.

Favorite thing about school?

Art class.

Favorite age?

Don’t really have one, maybe 4 or 5?

Favorite Christmas present?

My mom bought me a N64.

Favorite Dr. Seuss book?

Green Eggs & Ham

Favorite Halloween costume you've worn?

Technically I wore it as a teen, but the Silk Spectre II costume I wore when I was 17.

Favorite lunchbox snack?

Dunkaroos!

Favorite Winnie the Pooh character?

Pooh & Eeyore. 

Favorite thing to do during recess?

Read.

Favorite superhero?

Wonder Woman.

Favorite video game?

Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time.

Favorite color Power Ranger?

Pink.

Favorite fairy tale?

Does Beauty and the Beast count?

Favorite game to play outside?

Catch the flag.

Fashion & Beauty

Favorite department store?

Does Sephora count as a department store?

Favorite place to shop?

There’s a lot of places I love to shop. Mostly bookstores though.

Favorite store in the mall?

Indigo/Chapters (I love my books)

Favorite perfume/cologne?

YSL Black Opium or Chanel’s Coco Mademoiselle

Favorite hair color?

On me? A mix of auburn and dark brown

Favorite makeup you can't live without?

Eyebrow pencil 

Favorite shoes?

My thigh high dark brown suede go-go boots. ;)

Favorite occasion to dress up for?

I’ll honestly dress up for anything. I love dressing up.

Favorite hairstyle?

Anything wavy/curly with or without braids.

Favorite outfit you have?

Right now I have a super cute wrap dress that I like.

Favorite soap scent?

I like the smell of Dove soap, is that weird?

Favorite article of clothing?

I love high waist mini skirts.

Favorite place for a piercing?

Upper ear.

Favorite piece of jewelry?

Right now I’m a dork for the replica pendant from Crimes of Grindelwald. I also love this bracelet/ring/hand jewelry thing I have.

Favorite thing to wear to bed?

Sometimes lace and silk stuff ;) Sometimes just huge t-shirts

Favorite luxury brand?

YSL

Random

Favorite candle scent?

I love coconut scents.

Favorite extracurricular activity?

.....reading? (again)

Favorite day of the week?

Sunday

Favorite holiday?

Does Halloween count as a holiday?

Favorite website?

Well, I’m on Tumblr QUITE a bit...

Favorite way to communicate?

Usually face to face.. I hate talking on the phone. Text message is a close second.

Favorite Youtube video?

I love this dork. [x]

Favorite kind of house?

Victorian

Favorite car color?

Teal?

Favorite baby boy name?

I don’t know...

Favorite baby girl name?

Charlie, Evelyn

Favorite thing to do when you’re sick?

It’s an odd habit of mine to watch The Mummy or HP or Spice World for some reason

Favorite person you’ve never met?

Famous? Bryan Fuller Person in my life? MY THREE BEST FRIENDS!

Favorite question you’ve answered so far?

I don’t know...........

Favorite thing you’ve done in the last 24 hours?

I literally slept most of the day. Don’t judge me.

Favorite place to meet up with friends?

Kitty Cafes and.... cafes in general.

Favorite hobby?

Reading, making art.... listening to music

Favorite way to cheer you up?

Anything to do with Jude Law usually does the trick, bahaha

Favorite thing to look forward to?

Leaving this god awful small city to go explore other places.

Favorite kind of gift to receive?

Things that are heartfelt... things that people make whether it be handmade or... whatever... it’s really sweet.

Favorite crafty thing to make?

Does sketching count? Funny story, I used to get in trouble in art class in high school for sketching human anatomy (hands, collarbones etc) instead of reviewing art history notes, which I also loved by the way.

Favorite way to relax?

Reading, bubble baths.... other ways ;)

[talesofanadventurer-blog]

I'm doing everything to bring myself back to life

I can feel it deep in my chest. Everything is growing cold, and numb. I'm doing everything I can but I can't seem to make it better. I've made this sudden realization that every bad thing that's happened to me is my own fault. Including losing her. Especially losing her. I wish there was something more I could do but it's too late. Consequences that are results of my own idiotic actions, I have no other choice than to live with. Do you know how terrible that feels. To know how much pain you've inflicted on someone you love so much. Someone so pure hearted. Someone so innately good. It's horrific. What worse could I have done. I deserve every bit of this pain. I'm so fucked up in the head I never saw myself ripping her apart layer by layer until there was nothing left. I saw her depression and thought I could fix it. Never realizing I was the cause of it. I saw her look in the mirror and not even recognize herself because of how much I had mentally beaten her down. There might not have been bruises on the surface. But I swear now when I saw her looking in the mirror when she saw herself she was black and blue, and sleeping in the same bed as the man who did it to her. God I don't know how she slept. Truth is I don't think she did. There was a reason she slept more nights on the couch than in my bed. There was a reason why when we actually managed to be under the same sheets she was as far away from me as she could be. The most gut wrenching part is despite all of it. She stayed with me. She knew a long long time ago. That I was the one who did this to her. She knew I would only keep doing it to her. She stayed. She stayed for as long as she possibly could and then some because she wanted me to change. She believed I would see it and I would fix it. And every step of the way I only made her feel like it was her fault. She loved me. Truly she loved me. More than I think I ever gave her credit for. Surely much more than I deserved. Truth is she probably still does. But who in their right minds would go back to a relationship so toxic. All the while I thought I was doing good. What kind of monster am I really. How did I not see it. How could I be so narcissistic to not believe it was me. She sat in front of me crying telling me it WAS me. And I never understood. Despite trying to change trying to fix the things she needed of me. I never stopped abusing her emotionally. I wish I had known what I do know. There might have been something to salvage. Last night was the hardest one yet. I wasn't sure I'd even make it through the night. The hole in my chest I can't describe. If only she would forgive me. Truthfully I can't even ask that of her. I don't deserve forgiveness. I don't deserve the love she gave me. I don't deserve to have anyone with me through this. I should be alone. I should always be alone. After this I think I'm much better where I can't hurt anyone else. I've stopped praying for her happiness. I stopped praying for her healing. She is happy. And she is healing. And she is better without me. Now I just pray for forgiveness. I pray that I find solace in the silence. I pray for clarity. I pray that I will never hurt someone so badly again. Right now I feel there's more of a burning love for me at rest. One foot in front of the other. One breath at a time. Someday this will get easier. Someday I'll be forgiven. I just have to make it that far. I wish my love was enough, but I know it was my love that tore her apart. I don't think I can even tell her I still love her without her stomach turning. Without instilling some sort of fear into her. I passed by my old work today. Her car was there. I know at about this time she is usually hungry, and she'd kill for one of those strawberry Icees I stopped at the gas station next door to the place. I walked in and picked up the cup because I thought I could at least make her day a little better with such an innocent gesture. I stopped myself. She doesn't want my gestures. She doesn't want to see me. She doesn't want to hear from me. She wants absolutely nothing to do with me. That's why she let go of Koda. The dog I bought for her. I wanted it to work out. I wanted her to be able to see her anytime she wanted. Not on my terms on hers. But she refused. That is how badly she needs to be without me. She doesn't need me to remember her favorite flavor Icee, the fact that she loves flaming hot funions, or when she starts to get hungry at work. She doesn't need my apologies, my reminders that I miss her, that I love her, that I'd do anything to mend this shattered relationship. There is nothing that wonderful girl needs from me. It's time to accept that. I'm working on myself. I started my new job. I made friends with everyone immediately. I'm trying to be more open minded. I've reached out to family that I lost touch with. I'm trying to be ok. I really am. I'll be someone no one thought I could be. I'll take myself places no one thought I could go. I'll fix my fucked up head. I'll do my best to crawl out from this crippling depression that I brought upon myself. There's just so much work to do.