#Slip and die

[matcha-x-matcha]

one time I was locked out of the house for like 20 minutes waiting for my mom to get home after my friend dropped me off because they had an emergency and I got 38 mosquito bites so my mom had to lather me in coconut oil because they wdre swelling really bad because of the sheer amount and at that moment I knew what it felt like to be those weird rock picks from the Olympics, the way I slid across the floor nobody would have seen me coming

Moral of the story don't put coconut oil on the floor or your feet, you may die

[demonslayedher]

Yes, I am nut for the idea of Kanamori being a dad-figure to Muichiro. I love that Kagaya and even Himejima can be dad-figures to Muichiro. But if Muichiro is ever going to slip up and call anybody that, it's Tanjiro.

[logicallyblind]

my absolute favourite favourite favourite trope in fanfic is when thorin is outwardly a grouchy, ill tempered scowling dwarf whom bilbo just silently watches from afar lamenting the fact that someone like That would never give someone like Him the time of day-

and then the perspective shifts to thorin and we get to just listen to this smitten fool plan out their wedding in extreme detail all while waxing poetry about the sunlight shining through bilbo’s curls in his mind i just,,

[strewwwberry]

Cumplane exes is magical

I’ll explain with examples

Cucumber: “why would you create so many fucking aphrodisiacs?? Are you that desperate to get laid??”

Airplane: “well it worked didn’t it”

Cucumber: “Wtf?? No it didn’t- …”

Airplane: 🤨🤨

Cucumber: “…”

Cucumber initiates attack

Airplane attempts dodge!

Dodge fails, airplane dies

Went a lil off track but no matter here’s some more

Cucumber: “you know I don’t know why you like mobei jun so much? I mean I can get the appeal but like Binghe is right there”

Airplane: “you know binghe is my self insert and I may or may not have inspired mobei jun off of your personality”

Cucumber: “like I get it but- what.”

Airplane: “what?”

Cucumber: “backtrack- what”

Airplane: “I said what I said, there’s a reason Binghe is so great at sex”

Cucumber: “…”

Cucumber: “you’re not thattt good-“

Airplane: 🤨

Cucumber: “…”

Cucumber: “fuck off”

End.

I hope you enjoyed my Ted talk

[justnoodlefishthings]

I know it would probably be bad for politics but I think biden and trump should both die before the election it would be so fucking funny

[doliminuz]

This is just the ninja team and Jay, yeah?

[princepestilence]

Seems to me that people on this site with little to no sexual experience (a speculation, but one I’m decently confident in) will harp on and on about the dangers of “romanticising” the most outlandish scenarios very earnestly, like whether you should be friends with a rehabiliated genocidal alien or 200+ year age gaps -- and to an extent, I get it, all art is metaphor on some level, there are kernals of real experience in everything and those readings can be discussed discursively. 

But frankly I feel like if you really cared about actual people’s well-being, the absolute primary target for the literary “stop romanticising” battle cry would be shower sex and how it’s not even good. 

[rblxmaxxing]

💭GO STUPID GO CRAZYARRHGGGG

@digicam-x you caused This . my builderman brainworms ... i would post the whole page on its own but i dont like how much free space there Is so

[hypogryffin]

this bit too. why is cut content akechi like thsi all the time

[1-jar-of-stars]

you can kind of tell who was bullied in the yj fandom and how resolved their trauma is by how much empathy they have for the characters

[swan2swan]

Brooklynn actually trying to push Soyona to do the Right Thing, step by step, and failing, but not persisting and just putting her down at the end...it's important to me.

[femslashspuffy]

I love how the marks finally got to talk to each other and they're doing great figuring out a plan and then they get too Mark about it.

I literally said ohhhhh goddamnittttttt they have the same conflicting personality traits 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[conspiracy-frog]

Normal teens being so normal it's crazy

Tblr ate up the last npmd fanart I drew so a sequel was in order

[yunmeng-jiang]

every day i wish there had been a better solution for the qin su marriage problem.

in my fix-it fics i either have some other sect leader claim that he was actually madly in love with her this whole time and sweep her away for jgy's sake, have her mom confess earlier, make jgy decide to tell her for her own good and have them work together, or not give them a chance to meet and fall in love in the first place (i guess i could also make qin su have a miscarriage, but that's really sad and awful and not my preferred option at all), but all of those require tweaks to the circumstances, sometimes early on so they don't meet or jgy feels safe enough to talk with her or another confidant, or sometimes later like madam qin finding out they're pregnant before the marriage prep is too far along and telling one or both of them right away so they can make other arrangements.

with the situation being what it was, jgy didn't find out soon enough to do anything that wouldn't involve either marrying her anyway (and he didn't think telling her about it would do anything except make her upset and depressed) or leaving her essentially a ruined woman with no prospects and an illegitimate child who would inevitably grow up fatherless, which is pretty much exactly what his dad did to meng shi. this would be a crueler option than pretty much anything else, and given that he clearly still cares about her, he couldn't do that in good conscience. jgy tries his best to protect the people he loves, unless there is literally no other way for him to survive.

it's one more example of jgy being faced with a situation where the only choices are bad ones, and making the decision that he thinks will hurt the fewest number of people. metatextually, it's one more example of women in fiction being shoved aside and not given agency in their own lives, and getting killed off instead of surviving and growing as people like the male characters are allowed to do. it's just a tragic situation all around and i wish there had been something they could have done.

[potato-lord-but-not]

I've been a fan of yours since before the Malevolent era, but it still seems so crazy to me that there was a time not too long ago when you weren't drawing eldritch polyamory at all

No literally when I listened to the first episode of malevolent I had no idea what was in store for me. like I wouldn’t be able to even fathom the predicament I’ve found myself in.

[muffinlance]

Next Dark Night in Ba Sing Se part! Is! Fully outlined!

...And so is the majority of series in lesser detail because oops my hand slipped.