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[aasrawco]

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!!!

[arctic-hands]

Fuck it. Running late, took a shower last evening anyway, it's going to be hot and humid today and everyone will be a lil grimy

[cextra-loz]

This iron pill is healing me, or this eating more is healing me, or this salty cheese is healing me, or this hydration is healing me, or

[maxsourcekira]

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[lologoinsolo]

Main Masterlist, Cats and Their Men Masterlist, Part 2

Thinking about Simon with a runt of a kitten and it’s barely the size of his palm. Also thinking about the poor cashier that’s stumbling over her words when that hulking man has a kitten fisted in his palm and he just jerks it forward.

“U-Uh, sir, we can’t— I can’t keep that.” His eyes make you shrivel up and you delicately hold the little kitten in your hands. “We uh— the store can’t hold animals we only sell the stuff that animals need.”

He looks at you like that’s not what he’s wanted to hear. Granted you’ve had a couple people come up to try and surrender or drop of their animals like it’s a pound. “I need things for the cat.” He says and you feel like maybe you shot yourself in the foot.

You have a line piling up behind him but no one seems to dare speak up. Why would they when this guy could lay them flat out? Jesus what are they feeding this guy? Steroids and protein powders? You think before swallowing thickly. “I can… I can get my coworkers to—“

“No.” He reaches forward and you flinch when he picks up the kitten and holds it to his chest. “You’ll help.” Nodding off and he starts to walk leaving you dumbfounded and confused. He walks a couple steps before he turns to you with a ‘well?’ look on his face.

You hurriedly grab your pager and call for someone to go through the line while you help this guy. Leading him down the aisle for the litter and you list off the different types. “There’s crystal litter, wood pellets and those are pretty good when it comes to smell. We have tofu litter and that—“

“Does it need something fancy to shit in?” He cuts off the beginning of your speech with a huff. He sounds a mix of annoyed and amused with how you bristle from his remark. You’re tempted to leave, your manager can bitch later about you doing that butttt the kitten against his chest meows and you find that you can’t leave the little thing to suffer because their dad’s a right prick.

“Sir,” you take a breath, “the litter is moreso about preference. Do you want to hide the smell of their… ya know… poop better? Or would you prefer something that clumps or something that’s easy to clean?” You wait… and wait some more before he finally says.

“Pick one.”

You blink at him and he mimics it that bastard. He just stares the entire time you have this little contest. You’re starting to feel like you should’ve called out of work. You knew today would be horrible, your instincts never lie. “Okay,” taking a deep breath and spitefully picking the most expensive and heaviest litter that your store sells. You yank it off the shelf with a groan. If it’s hard for you to lift then he’ll probably have the time of his life having to lug this home. He doesn’t seem to care about the pricing nor the weight though as he grabs the litter from your struggling arms. He shoves the kitten back to your empty hands. “I—“ you stumble over your words, trying to come up with something but he beats you to it.

“Where’s the food she need?” Lifting it onto his shoulders, the muscles bulging as he holds that thing with ease.

“Well she,“ you cough to keep from ogling too much. “Will need some kitten food and maybe some wet food later on. A good kibble would be good to add later on once she gets older,” holding the kitten up gently and her little green eyes blink at you. You prod softly at her teeth to make sure she can handle those foods. You’re hoping she’s not to young or she’ll need kitten formula. You then check her ears and see some red marks. Noticing the little black specs moving about her neck and you cringe. “And a good flea bath. Poor thing,” petting the little baby as you walk off to grab a flea comb. He’ll have to buy it anyways so you’ll make use of it now. You pick at her fur with the comb and squish whatever fleas that you find, you hate those little fuckers. “What’s her name?”

You’ve noticed he’s as silent as a grave this customer of yours. He’s hardly said a peep besides caveman grunts and nods. If it wasn’t for him nearly against your side then you would’ve thought he ran off. That black surgical mask makes him look like he’s something important. Maybe mafia or something possibly dangerous. But… he did come in holding this tiny kitten and isn’t batting an eye at the things you’ve been telling him he’ll need to get for his new pet. Perhaps he’s nicer than your judgement of him is.

You clear your throat, he probably didn’t hear you since he hasn’t tilted his head down. “Does she have a name?” You ask once more and he pulls to a stop, he had came back with a cart earlier when there were too many things for him to hold in his tree trunk arms. It was comical seeing him try to hold a litter box, scratching post, and various foods though.

He doesn’t answer save for the roll of his shoulders that looks like it could be counted as a shrug. You mouth an ‘oh’ before you mind your business. He probably just found her or he’s gonna foster and send her off. Better to not get attached…

You chatter off the things he’ll need to do. See a vet, get her spayed, make sure she has no health problems, the usual things that you mention to pet parents. The little thing in your hands is a curious thing, she wiggles about constantly. Eager to move and escape your hands and arms. Tiny tail flicking about and the meowing and pawing is cute, makes your heart squeeze when he plucks her from your hands and he holds her close. You push the cart along and stop at the toys and bowl aisle.

“Well,” you pull some toys off the shelf, crinkle toys and mouses that should help with those prey instincts. “She’s a sweetheart. I’d probably call her Bailey,” you smile fondly and his brows furrow at your advice. Grabbing the kitten shaped bowls and hurriedly putting them in the cart when you squirm under his eyes. “Oh uh, my brother always wanted a cat named Bailey. It’s a nice name but if you don’t want to call her—“

“Bailey,” he holds her up a little and the kitten paws at his face. Her little nails snag on the fibers of his mask and he pulls them off quickly. “Better than garbage, yeah?” He speaks to the kitten like a human. There’s a crinkle besides his eyes and you realize he’s smiling but when you catch what he said you drop this cactus scratcher you thought he should buy her by accident.

“Garbage?” You look aghast. You’ve heard all kinds of names but never something like that. Quickly picking the cactus scratcher back up and placing it in the piling up cart. “You’d call her that?”

He shrugs his massive shoulders again. “S’where I found ‘er.” Grumbling his reasoning. He glares at the kitten like she’s the cause of his problems. “Couldn’t sleep with’er howling and rummaging about. Made a mess that I had to clean.”

You blink a bit and now it makes some sense why he’s so… snappy? “Well… maybe she knew you’d get her if she was loud enough.”

He scoffs, “she bit and hissed at me.” He rubs his finger over her head and you notice the little red marks on his hands. “Feisty little shit shoulda left ya out in the cold.” She nips at him and he chuckles something deep.

You can’t help the smile that reaches your face. She plays with his fingers and he doesn’t flinch when she bites hard or digs her nails in. He just looks down at her with something akin to wonder and begrudged responsibility.

You pull him to your cash register and his kitten racks up a pretty hefty bill but he pays for it with wads of cash. You don’t speak on the weird crumbled bills nor the faint reddish brown color. You simply bag his items and put them in his cart. “If you need anything, sir. Come find me and I’ll help, okay?” You can’t believe you said it AND actually ment it. What can you say, you love cats more than people and that little thing won your heart as easily as she won his.

He gives a gruff nod and pushes his cart out with on hand. The kitten is pushed into his coat pocket to hide her most likely from the cold outside. She pokes her head out to give a complaint but he just gently pushes her back in. He leaves without waving and you’re left to wonder if he’ll come back. You kinda hope he does come back.

[fromdove]

MY JASON TODD PHYSICAL APPEARANCE HEADCANONS !

welcome to my ted talk. go ahead and sit your semi-literate goblin ass down and take notes, because i am about to paint you a portrait of this man so vivid you’ll think i dipped my brush in the lazarus pit itself.

HETEROCHROMIA. one blue eye & one green eye. im a very big and firm believer on this. this is my religion. this is my prayer. jason todd's eyes are my gospel, and I am the devoted disciple on my knees at the altar. he's always had them, before the lazarus pit & AFTER the lazarus pit. (although after the lazarus pit id like to point out that his eyes got a bit brighter especially the green!). i saw fanart once of this—just one image—and it was enough to send me into a trance. my jaw unhinged like a snake

LARGE SHARP ALMOND EYES. eyes sharp enough to cut!! real real real. sharp enough to gut someone in an alley. you get looked at by him and feel like you need to apologize for crimes you haven’t committed yet. yup that. they soften when he looks at you tho bc ur his amazing angel faced baby.

HIS GODDAMN JAWLINE. the kind you see on statues. could cut diamonds. so perfect. brutal. Pythagoras would rise from the grave with a boner, calculator in hand, shaking and crying overwhelmed by the sheer geometry of him. drooling. weeping & erect.

6'4!!!!!!!!!! MY MAN IS TALL. A GIANT. GARGANTUAN. and that’s the final word. idgaf. don’t come in here with that “canon says he’s 6’0” nonsense. fuck canon. canon is a lie built by cowards. they've screwed up my babies too many times to count. my Jason ducks under door frames and casts shadows over people trying to insult him. he intimidates every man in a ten-mile radius just by standing up.

BULKY. (not crazy bulky like those steroid obsessed body builder protein-powder-in-the-veins monstrous freaks but still jacked af. (like in this picture: click here and here) . he’s jacked like a Greek statue, like a renaissance painting of a war god.

white streak. white streak 24/7 for the rest of infinity. all night. every universe. every reboot. i don’t care. Non-negotiable. he got it from the one and only pit. he tried to cut it, dye it, tried everything to get rid of it at first but it just kept growing back and the dye would never work on it somehow ??/ so he just gave up lmao

OKOK his nose. my fave nose to picture jason with is an sightly upturned nose with a bump in the middle. do you guys know what kind of nose im yappin about? here is a visual: click here

ive seen fanart with jason with the j scar and i just think it fits his character and backstory. yes it was from that makeup-smeared tragedy of a circus reject. but fuck him!! this is about jason peter todd. my baby is still hot af anyways so.

SHARP CANINES. BITE ME WITH THEM. LORDDD MOTHERR GODDD. Carnivore-coded. was he born with them? is it a lazarus thing? either way theyre sharp little bastards. He tries to be careful, he reallyyy does but sometimes, mid-kiss, they slip. he nips you. he pulls back, eyes wide, guilt-ridden. you’re breathless. he spews like a million apologizes coz the last thing he wants to do it hurt u. but u dont care bc it feels so goddamn good... STOP ME)

Full lips that look like they’re always swollen from a brawl or a kiss.. with a slight cupids bow. god. yes. the corners/edges of his mouth are sharp (does that make sense?? help). he also has scars extending from the corners that look like smiles, they only stretch a few centimeters out. not that long at all. joker’s parting gift, poetic as it is cruel. OH AND he has the Toji scar !!! this one right here: click here

dark brown hair thats wavy & fluffy heeheheh (2c textured.) not straight, not curly, that luscious in-between mess that stays tousled and tragic and stupidly sexy no matter what. fluffy. thick. ruffles in the wind like he's some sad, angry prince. you run your hands through it and he pretends he doesn’t melt. he is NAWT a victim of the male pattern baldness epidemic. bye no no no no he doesnt bald thanks to the lazarus pit.

THICK DARK & FULL STRAIGHT BROWSSS. IDCCC THIS MAN HAS THICK BROWS. These brows have seen things. They furrow when he’s pissed (which is like always lmao), They’re intimidating, god-tier brows kinda brows. oh oh and theyre also kind of upturned !

his fingers. jesusususususus. Veiny. Long-fingered. Calloused. Worn. His knuckles are always scabbed (from fights). His nails are short, His fingers could snap a neck, but you just want them on your throat for different reasons. And the rings? Thick, heavy, sharp. Some brass. Some iron. they double as weapons. like i just know if someone pisses him off the rings are going to hurt like straight up fucking hell.

this man has long lashes. like long enough to collect dew. Thick enough to cast shadows. curled at the tips. his lashes are criminal. like wtf. theyre the kind that make mascara cry. they frame his eyes and face perfectly

scars all over. he has the autopsy scar on his chest, he has scars on his back too. his face, arms, legs, everywhere. bullet grazes, knife cuts etc..his entire body is a war journal basically

he has eye bags and dark circles which is a given considering what he does and his lack of sleep. They're not “oh, I pulled an all-nighter” eye bags, theyre bruised purpulish blue with a bit of red. u can seen some veins. his eye bags r a little puffy. this paired with his sharp eyes make him look very very intimidating to others but not to u, bc wdym intimidating? he's my angel?? he would never hurt a fly?? tf?

a few extra's!!:

A slight scar on his eyebrow from a fall off a fire escape in crime alley when he was 12. Never stitched it (despite the constant nagging from bruce & alfred). he said the blood made him look cool. (my angel baby i love him)

a voice that’s deeper than you expect. gravelly. like he chewed cigarettes for breakfast and chased them with glass. but it dips soft when he says your name. unbearably soft. traitorously tender.

faint cigarette burn on the inside of his left forearm. from back when he thought pain might be the only thing that made him real. said it was an accident. it wasn’t.

A barely-there tremor in his right hand. Old injury. Nerve damage.

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[birdyisthewordyy]

HELLOOO this is my first request.. 😔

Like can you make a thing where the reader (please make it a fem reader for this one) is mascular fem reader and how the mouthwash crew will be react or be with the reader😻

if you can do this pleasee do it!! This has been just on my mind..

(I'm sorry if I couldn't describe it pretty well but I hope you understand it👅🙏)

a/n: I went ahead and combined two asks because they were pretty similar I HOPE THATS OKAY!! ANYWAY I love these askS MUSCULAR WOMEN FTW

Tulpar crew with a muscular! Fem! Reader

Curly

He can still lift you up easy peasy

Loves doing weightlifting with you

Brags on you

“My girlfriend can bench press 400!”

When you get sore he runs a hot bath for you

With rose petals and Epsom salts

Watches movies with you and gives you massages

Anything for his girl

You two have a friendly competition to see how much you can lift

The gym hates to see y’all coming

Or loves to

You kind of brighten up the atmosphere with your mushy couple junk

Y’all are matched in arm wrestling

You try every day

Never works

You just stay there with your arms shaking

Lol

He’s ecstatic to have another workout buddy though

Especially one that doesn’t take it as seriously as Jimmy

Jimmy

Speak of the devil himself

He’s jealous

Right off the bat he’s jealous of you

Because he could never achieve that physique

His metabolism is too fast

And it pisses him off

He eventually comes around

Makes underhanded comments sometimes though

Meanie

He might weightlift with you

You’re a good spotter he has to admit

Encouraging and all that

Despite how jacked you are you are pretty feminine

Which he enjoys

He likes that you dress up and do makeup and all that

And if you’re not he appreciates how…

Eugh

“Drama free” you are

One of those guys

Yikes

You love him though

Swansea

Swansea didn’t grow up in a generation where women could just pick up a weight and start growing muscle

Despite this he thinks it’s badass

He’d never say that but he does

Appreciates your commitment

Maybe even attracted to it idk

An excellent cook so he makes things for you if you’re hungry after lifting

Makes banger soups

He’s pretty strong himself

But doesn’t work out too often

Just enough and if he feels like it

He’s got a bad back so nothing crazy

Take this man to a chiropractor

If you use protein powder he doesn’t understand it

“Back in my day we had to work for what we got!”

You try to explain it’s not like steroids

But he is NOT having it

Sometimes you go overboard though

And he does worry for you

“Just…be careful, alright? Don’t want you exhausting yourself on me.”

Daisuke

Daisuke is also just a little bit jealous

He gets over it though

He buys you one of those giant water bottles that have words of encouragement on the sides

Says it’s like he’s there with you

You love this boy

Would be like

“Oh yeah? Can YOUR partner do 50 pushups? (Name), show em!”

Makes you personalized playlists

Eye of the Tiger is definitely on there

Along with Wheels on the Bus

He giggles when he hears it coming from your headphones

You just look at him like WTF

Would be your spotter

Very encouraging

“You can do it! Two more!”

Fists in the air

Tries to fist bump you

You are exhausted I fear

Would sit on your back while you do push-ups

To prove a point

What point? Idk

Anya

Anya has tried working out in the past and never really got into a routine

She’s a little bit out of shape so she’s at least happy that you know what you’re doing

Buys you sweatbands with pretty little designs on them

Also makes you protein shakes in the morning

Without you asking

May try to work out with you

Gets extremely sore though

Anya with a ponytail is cute tho

She can’t do push-ups

Like physically she just collapses

It’s not even that she’s weak

She’s actually quite strong physically

And mentally too but that’s not the point

She almost beat you once in arm wrestling

She just gets tired easily

Little chubby

Totally not projecting again

Hee hee

[writingpastmybedtime]

Mine

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x f!Reader

Summary: Bucky and Reader have to pretend to be husband and wife on a mission, even though they do not get along at all. Your classic enemies-to-lovers trope.

Word Count: 1.4k

Warnings: none, although Bucky is hot as always.

A/N: this has been rewritten as of March 2025

She should have known better, really. In what world would wearing a short, black, curve-hugging dress not go unnoticed by the Super Soldier, whose gaze Y/N wished to avoid.

Bucky and her had been clashing with each other for months now, wreaking havoc at every possible moment—causing quite the headache for the fellow Avengers in the compound. It had become a common knowledge that the team tried to avoid assigning them to the same missions, unless they wanted to witness the two of them getting into another stupid argument. Which they did not.

Unfortunately, that all changed when Natasha fell ill, leaving Y/N to replace her on an undercover mission. She had to pretend to be the doting wife of a Russian mobster, Ivan Sarkovich—who was actually none other than James Buchanan Barnes himself.

Needless to say, neither Y/N or Bucky went on the mission without a fight. It had been Tony, who shut them up quite quickly, reminding them of the innocent lives that would be harmed if they did not succeed in this mission. Seeing as there was no one else available to take Natasha’s place, Y/N had no other choice but to begrudgingly agree.

So here she was, at a surprisingly lavish Balkan hotel, somewhere in Eastern Europe with the most exhausting and tiresome being—literally the bane of her existence—Bucky Barnes. The man with the most gorgeous blue eyes, the body of a Greek God on steroids, and hands Y/N had spent too much time imagining doing the most outrageous things to her.

No one knew Y/N harboured those kinds of thoughts—and feelings—towards the ex-Winter Soldier, however it hadn’t been too hard to hide them when he acted like a total jackass towards her. She had put up a façade, not letting anyone see her true feelings, least of all him. Not when he couldn’t even stand to be in the same room as Y/N without snickering another cruel remark. Had he ever not acted so indifferent towards her, perhaps they wouldn’t have been in this predicament to begin with.

For now, fortunately, Bucky had already gone downstairs to play poker with the people who the two were supposed to investigate.

Ruslan Nikolaevich was a Russian mobster behind a drug cartel that had been shipping new kinds of supplements to New York, mainly appealing to teens and young adults. They sold the powder under the pretense of protein, however it was nothing similar of the sort—it was actually a lethal mixture between amphetamine and LSD.

Bucky and Y/N had to gain enough information about the next possible drop-off, starting with learning the location of the drop and the recipient. She was supposed to join her dear husband downstairs in about five minutes, playing the ever-clingy, happy, and satisfied wife.

Smoothing down the invisible wrinkles on her satin dress, Y/N took a last look in the mirror before deeming herself good to go. Perhaps her dress had been too much—too bold of a choice—but without a second thought, she left the safety of their hotel room.

Walking towards the men sitting at the poker table, Y/N held her chin high, back straight, and kept her gaze solely on Bucky. He was donning an all-black suit, the one that she secretly thought fit him the best. The one she wished he would wear when he’d order her into the most crude positions.

Bucky looked up from the table and straight at her, as if hearing her inner monologue. A smirk graced his lips as she neared, and he patted his lap—a signal for Y/N to take her assigned seat.

It was totally normal, and strangely expected of the Russian mobsters to have their wives (and mistresses) sitting on their lap—a means to show off. So, as expected of her, Y/N sat down. 

Right on Bucky’s deliciously firm thighs.

“I thought you would ditch me, considering how long you took,” Bucky said as he nuzzled into her neck, causing a shiver to go down her spine. 

Y/N grinned, placing a seductive hand on his jaw, grazing the slight stubble on his skin. “Now what kind of a wife would I be, if I did not show up to support my perfect husband?” She raised an eyebrow at him, making Bucky chuckle darkly. He placed a lingering, yet chaste, kiss against her temple before turning his focus back on the game.

“I wish my Maria still looked at me the same way your девушка looks at you,” a man with a thick accent said—Y/N noted that it must’ve been Ruslan—looking over at them with a longing gaze. For some odd reason, the comment made Bucky place his vibranium arm over her waist, pulling her closer, as if he wanted to protect Y/N against the Russians that eyed you with lustful glints in their eyes.

Bucky’s only response had been a chuckle.

“If you’re willing,” another man spoke, “you could also share your сладостью with the others.” He was eyeing Y/N up and down, making her second-guess her choice in dress. The men around the table were whispering to each other now, each new voice making Bucky to tighten his grip on her body.

“Gentlemen,” Bucky said with a tilt of his head before throwing his cards on the table. “I’m afraid this sweet thing is not for sharing. I have already made plans with her for the entirety of the rest of the evening.”

The men around the table laughed, but still looked at Y/N with desire and a certain kind of jealousy towards Bucky—correction—Ivan Sarkovich.

“I think it’s time we took our leave. My wife seems to be getting tired of our manly chit-chat and boyish games.” With a nudge to her waist, Y/N feigned a believable yawn, clinging to Bucky and playing the ever-attached wife. He wished the other men good-night before guiding her towards an elevator at the back of the room.

When the doors closed, and Y/N could finally take a breath, letting go of the fake act, Bucky took a hurried step in front of her. He was seething.

“Are you out of your goddamn mind to wear a dress like that in front of them?”

Y/N looked down at her beautiful dress, picking off invisible lint from it.

“Do you have any idea what kind of a position you’ve put me in? The things they whispered.” Bucky sighed, closing his eyes as if to calm himself.

The Russian language had been confusing to her, having only learned the basics for the mission, but Y/N knew Bucky was fluent. He’d understood every word, every vulgar thing spoken about her.

She saw his hands shake on the railing next to her that he’d gripped to ground himself, his knuckles turning white on his right hand with how much strength he’d put behind the action.

“Fuck, doll—” his blue eyes looked at her, a shade darker and almost half-lidded, before he suddenly surged forwards and gripped her jaw, aligning her face with his own. “You only belong to—”

Bucky’s sentence was abruptly cut off by the elevator doors opening and he nonchalantly let go of Y/N, walking off towards their shared suite.

There was nothing else to do but follow, even if Y/N still felt ashamed, and confusingly enough, a little bit aroused by his strange behaviour. Bucky had never acted this way before.

Y/N was left wondering how his sentence should’ve ended…

As she closed the door, Bucky’s warm breath was on her neck. A gentle, strong hand moved strands of her hair off her shoulder before chuckling darkly. His placed his forehead in the crook of Y/N’s neck, letting out a deep breath. His hands had found their way to her waist, pulling her smaller body tight against his own.

“Y/N, do you have any idea what you do to me?” 

She could feel his lips grazing her skin as he spoke, causing a shudder to pass her body, and the most obscene thoughts to fill her mind. Bucky whispered her name again, causing Y/N to stifle a whimper.

“If my observations are correct, I think you got jealous over that suggestive comment,” she managed to whisper, her head resting against the door—grounding her with something. 

Bucky pressed himself closer to her, leaving Y/N sandwiched between him and the brown, wooden door of the suite.

“Only I can make comments like that. No one else.” A languid, open-mouthed kiss was placed on Y/N’s neck, her head automatically falling back on his chest. It was as if she no longer had any control over her body; only moving on his accord.

“You’re mine.”

[ficretus]

*Alternate version of Volume 9*

Weiss: You saved us... Who are you?

*tries to take off his helmet, accidentally flexes his muscles and destroys entire armor*

Jaune: Sigh... not again...

Weiss: Jaune?!

Yang: Vomit Boy?!

Blake: At this point that's Vomit Man.

Ruby: Jaune what happened to you? You look like... a lump of muscles with head sticking out.

Weiss: Lump of very nice looking muscles mind you.

Jaune: It's a long story. I'll take you to my home.

*they enter the village full of sentient gym equipment*

Jaune: These are my friends, Pump Irons and that over there is Juniper. She was my mount, but now she... she can no longer carry me.

Yang: Colorful bunch.

Jaune: I adventured with humans Alyx and Lewis... and a Cat. Long story short, Alyx betrayed me and slipped me some kind of white powder in the tea. Juniper saved me and brought me to this village.

Weiss: This sounds oddly similar to Girl Who Fell Through World and Rusted Knight.

Blake: Don't be silly Weiss, this is clearly a tale of Roided Knight.

Yang: Roided Knight? I guess that makes sense.

Ruby: Look Jaune, Roided, Rusted or whatever Knight, we need your help.

Jaune: Sure, lets go.

*One of the Pump Irons starts grumbling*

Jaune: What is it Coach?

*more grumbling*

Jaune: Oh. Sorry, I need to complete two more sets before I go with you.

Ruby: *groans*

*some time later*

Ruby: *looks at knocked out Neo* Could you have at least held back a bit Jaune?

Jaune: I was holding back.

Yang: Meh, that bitch had it coming.

Weiss: That was hot.

Blake: Lets go to the portal.

*team RWBY passes through portal*

Weiss: Where is Jaune?

Jaune: *heads pops through portal* This is bit awkward, my body is too swole to pass though. Can you help me out?

Ruby: *groans*

*in Vacuo*

Tyrian: Impressive defenses Noble Knight, but how will they fare against sting of death?

*his stinger breaks against Jaune's skin*

Tyrian: But how? My Semblance bypasses Aura!

Jaune: That's not Aura.

*knocks out Tyrian with a single punch*

Mercury: I wanna switch sides

Jaune: Smart choice.

Ruby: *groans*

*in Evernight*

Cinder: Fufufu, how pitiful. Knight without both shield and sword. Wouldn't you agree, your Majesty? *looks behind her, Salem is gone* Your Majesty?

*Jaune knocks out Cinder with a single punch*

Jaune: That's another one down as well. It seems Salem teleported to another dimension, so we are done here.

Ruby: What the... heck was all this?

Jaune: What do you mean?

Ruby: You... you... defeated Neo... and Tyrian... and Cinder... redeemed Mercury... scared Salem into running away. You found Relic of Choice... somehow.

Jaune: I just walked through that wall.

Ruby: It's a pocket dimension Jaune! How? Just how?

Jaune: Just prayers and vitamins Ruby... and copious amount of steroids... and heart attack... *collapses*

Ruby: *groans*

[maxsourcekira]

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[thenationofzaun]

A Dark Vi in Season 2:

I'm hoping for a darker take on Vi in season 2. Imagine if Vi takes up a bitter attitude towards Jinx that's similar to Ekko's before the bridge fight - "Powder's gone, all that's left is Jinx." I say before the bridge fight because I think Ekko had a moment of growth there in his view of Jinx, where he was forced to confront the truth that Powder and Jinx are the same person, no matter how much he tries to divorce them to make it easier to kill Jinx.

Back to Vi, it's possible that in response to Jinx's rebuff of her, she bitterly disowns Jinx right back. Not immediately, no. I think Vi in the immediate aftermath of the finale would still be self-blaming, devastated, and confused. But after a while, when Jinx continues to demonstrate her disinterest in reconciling with Vi and her zeal in warring with Piltover of her own accord, even in the absence of Silco, Vi's view of her sister would have to change. I could see anger and resentment creeping in after a while. Vi would have to accept that her sister willingly rebuffed her and chose Silco, willingly ditched Vander's side. Vi might give in to that petty, indignant anger of a child upset with her sibling - "she left me, she is not my sister anymore!"

I can imagine her taking up an attitude like "I don't have a sister. My sister died a long time ago." Kind of like Ekko including Powder on his "wall of the dead" mural. It'd be growth for Vi, just not a positive one. She'd finally accept that there's no "bringing the old Powder back", but she'd pivot all the way to the other end of the spectrum with "you know what, fuck Jinx, the Powder I loved is dead and gone." This would be doubly sad and ironic considering her words in episode 9 - "Are we still sisters?" "Nothing is ever going to change that."

Imagine her telling Ekko "you were right" as she finally agrees with what he said to her in episode 7, but Ekko just has mixed feelings because he himself has since realized he was wrong in saying that. The Powder they loved is not dead, has never been dead. She's still here. She just made choices they disagreed with. She chose to join their enemy. And that's a much harder truth to live with than simply insisting she died and calling it a day.

Vi's view of her sister perfectly parallels her view of the undercity. In season 1 it was horror to find that the old version, the one under Vander, has changed so much in the time she was locked up. It was a refusal to accept this change, an insistence that the old home/sister can still be brought back, all she had to do was remove Silco's rule/influence and she'd restore her home/sister to the way it used to be.

They could continue this parallel in season 2. Vi could give in to anger and disown them both. Begin grieving Vander's undercity and Powder in tandem, while scorning Silco's Zaun and Jinx. She could fall out with Ekko due to this. Where he still wants to live in and help heal the undercity, Vi wants to leave it and turn against it. Vi could blame the undercity for allowing Silco's takeover and "not lifting a finger to stop him". She could take on a harsh view of her people, the Lanes in particular - "They betrayed Vander, they allowed the rise of Chembarons, did nothing to avenge my family in my absence. They're weak." She'd butt heads with Ekko over this, straining their relationship.

It would push her further into the arms of Caitlyn (and Piltover). She'd bury her pain in rage against all of "Silco's ilk". She'd want to wipe out all his loyalists and the Chembarons, since she couldn't fulfill her vengeance on him specifically. She'd think the best way to accomplish this goal is through tougher enforcement and punitive measures from the enforcers/Council. Basically the same thing she did in episode 8 but on steroids, eventually leading to her joining the enforcers. Imagine Ekko's reaction. He has spent the last 7-8 years feeling betrayed by Jinx for joining his enemy. Now Vi returns to him from the dead, and even she betrays him by joining another of his enemies? While the sisters are so preoccupied with feeling abandoned by each other, Ekko feels abandoned by them both. The game has Ekko admonishing Vi as a traitor so I'm excited to see it in the show.

But of course, Vi's elaborate talk of "Powder is dead and only Jinx remains" would just be her way of coping and rationalizing her sister's betrayal. Just like Ekko, it'd be her way of convincing herself she can fight and kill Jinx. But when it comes down to it, she wouldn't actually want Jinx dead. The conflict this would cause with Caitlyn and Piltover... imagine Vi is fighting Jinx and at the last moment, she can't bring herself to deliver the final blow. Jinx gets away and now Vi is disgraced by topsiders, who question her loyalty to them. "Of course we shouldn't have trusted a trencher on the force." Now she is rejected by both cities. Hated by Piltover for bigoted reasons and for her relation to Jinx, hated by Zaunites for being a class traitor.

She'd be a complete outcast, and from here, there could be a lot of character growth. Sometimes you need to hit rock bottom before finding your way back up. Maybe she could dig into Vander's past and find out about his falling out with Silco. Uncovering the past of her beloved mentor whom she idolized, she'd begin to see him for the flawed man he actually was. Realize that he'd have never wanted her to give in to rage. Never wanted her to help bring Piltover's wrath down on Zaun. She'd begin to understand not just Vander, but Silco too, and Jinx's love for him. Not be happy with it of course, just understanding. That's what I'm hoping for in the end - not a reconciliation between the sisters, just a bittersweet understanding. Accepting of each others' choices even if they disagree with them. Anyway, I'm interested to see what they do with Vi's character in Season 2, since I found her to be underwritten in Season 1.

TLDR: A darker, angrier take on Vi in Season 2 could lead to some very interesting places.

[riddlers-roulette]

Probably a bit of a hot take, and definitely petty fandom salt, but i’ve come to notice that in recent years, with most fandom spaces becoming puritanical in their efforts to ice out anything that can be labeled toxic, or anything that just doesn't fit the fandom’s prevalent opinions on a situation or character–a phenomenon that has only been exacerbated by TikTok and the overuse of “therapy-speak”--there seems to be a general lack of nuance and/or sense of media literacy in most vocal fandom spaces when it comes to a story that is not just black and white.

Arcane is one of the most recent example of this, with (arcane s2 spoilers ahead) characters caitlyn and vi being discussed pretty heavily with the terms like “domestic abuse” and “abuser apologism” particularly when it comes to caitlyn’s act of jabbing her rifle at vi’s side before walking away, leaving vi anguished. Now, i’m not saying domestic abuse is not real–i’m just saying, that in this instance, I don't believe that the act was domestic violence, nor do i believe that any of the parties that make up CaitVi are abusers.

Arcane itself is a complex story with heart shattering situations that the characters find themselves in constantly, often putting them at odds with their morals, the morals of their environment, and the morals of the audience. Do I think caitlyn was right to jab her rifle at vi? No. But we as an audience can tell that neither does Caitlyn herself. Neither does Vi. But when Caitlyn did so, it was when she was under immense emotional duress, her mother’s killer getting away, and she was blocked from taking vengeance by the person she trusted the most. When she said the horrible things she did, she was hurting and angry and lashing out–she was punching the walls like a woman gone. And why is it that we can offer characters like Jinx the grace to absolve her of her crimes due to her own psychotic breaks, but not other characters to their own actions done in moments of their own breakdowns? Vi punching Powder, for instance. An act that had Vi villainized by the fandom for a long time. 

Which brings me to another point–absolution. It is one the extremes characters tend to fall into when it comes to fandom, with the other extreme being amplification. A character’s sins tend to be glossed over, or explained away so that the character in question becomes an unquestionable angel and champion of justice, or, in other cases, tend to be overly exaggerated, making the character out to be the worst of the worst, the lowest of the low. Rarely is there an in-between, with multifaceted characters complete with riveting backstory and motivations and complicated characteristics inevitably losing a little of what makes them, them, all in the pursuit of woobification, gratuitous groveling from other characters, and victimization; it’s an apology fantasy on steroids. In other cases, and often, connected cases, if one character is getting the baby treatment then chances are that another is getting the villain treatment, becoming a sort of caricature of themselves. Motives and environmental factors and politics are all thrown out the window, and all that’s left is cartoonish, flat, oft one-dimensional portrayals. 

Arcane’s Silco is an example of the former, with the singular trait of caring for Jinx becoming twisted and emphasized until he is nigh unrecognizable. His harmful actions towards the undercity are erased and he is lifted up instead as something other than he was. He is transformed from the fascinatingly flawed, human depiction to something bland and uncanny. He is just a Poor Sad Betrayed Meow Meow who is also a Good Dad. But it’s okay because he also does crimes! Except wait, those crimes are also sanitized and cutesy, or horrific and without reason or logic. He has lost what makes him, him.

And for the other half of the coin, the unnecessary villainization, we have Jayce! Jayce was hated upon widely, especially after the release of Season 1, and his struggles were erased.

(and yes, there were struggles. Jayce was more privileged than those from the Undercity, that is unquestionable, but he was not as privileged as the other Council members or even most of his peers. He had the fortune of a patron, but that was something that had to be earned, and he could always risk losing. He was from a House, yes, but it was also a minor one, and he would have labored in his factories alongside other workers–he wasn’t a crazy wealthy guy. He staked his entire life on his research that he was actually going to take his own life when his dream was taken from him. His dream wasn’t to generate wealth by unlocking the arcane, but rather, it was to put these tools in the hands of the common man too. One of his first act as councilors was to immediately try to root out corruption. He was able bodied and from Piltover, and so, had more privilege than Viktor (who is my favorite arcane character) that is undeniable. But Jayce did have struggles, he wasn’t taken seriously by the Council due to his own status and had to go through them initially when it came to his own HexTech. Jayce had struggles,but Jayce is a POC and Viktor is a white boy, so Jayce’s problems are gonna be minimized by fandom but that’s a whole other issue–)

And yet, three years ago, the Jayce hate was at a total high, with every action of his being dramatized so as to make Viktor’s pain far more excruciating. 

I’ve derailed a little! The point of this post was to point out the “therapy speak” in fandom that often comes at the cost of lifting one character up and bashing the other, all while skipping over the context and nuance for the gray situations the characters found themselves in. All this to say–with fandom’s recent behaviors when it comes to relationships in fandom, it really makes you wonder if people have forgotten that relationships aren’t easy and actually require constant work and effort. That relationships change and evolve and grow with each obstacle that comes one’s way, and that sometimes things get rough, but that love is being able to understand and empathize with one’s partners–that not everything is black and white and that not every mistake is irredeemable.

edit: also, don’t really care enough to argue with ppl on this point in the notes. it’s tired and repetitive and half the time it’s like arguing with a brick wall. if this gets out of hand I will start deleting and/or restricting replies

[scientia-rex]

Best Things I Have Bought

I'm not sure how successful I will be in remembering all of it, but I'll try. These have all been game-changers for me, in a variety of ways. If teen me had had access to all of these, I would have been a vastly happier person.

This one is long, so I'll put in a cut.

-outlet timers. Not having to go around and manually turn off lamps at bedtime? Amazing. I bought these but you can and should get some that have a grounded outlet with three prongs so you can attach good extension cords to them.

-famotidine. aka Pepcid, it's the safest option I currently know of for managing acid reflux. I get nauseated when I get acid reflux, so this is a necessity for me.

-T-Gel shampoo. The only one that keeps my husband's insane dandruff under control. Coal tar shampoos smell peculiar, but are totally worth it if they work. For my hair, I like anti-dandruff conditioner--I apply it to my scalp and my other conditioners to the length of my hair. After bleaching my hair, I use Olaplex 3 to prevent more severe damage; the difference is very noticeable.

-white vinegar for a laundry rinse. I get horrendous contact dermatitis and adding this in the "fabric softener" cup in my washer keeps things from making my skin burn.

-on a similar note, all Oxy laundry booster. Doesn't make my skin burn but does make stains and smells noticeably better than detergent alone.

-Aquaphor. If you have eczema, nothing helps like Aquaphor, unless it's hydrocortisone ointment (the same white petrolatum base as Aquaphor but with hydrocortisone) or a prescribed steroid.

-Bissell Stomp 'N' Go pads. I have stomped. The stain goes.

-Prune puree. A packet a day keeps the chronic constipation at bay. Less volume to consume than prune juice and, in my opinion, slightly more palatable.

-Chinotto is a bitters-based beverage that I discovered by accident really helps my chronic nausea. I've tried other brands, and San Pellegrino is definitely my favorite. Tastes weird at first, but when heavy-duty ginger ale doesn't ease it, Chinotto can. And when that doesn't work, I have Zofran (ondansetron) my doctor prescribed me for the nausea I get with migraines, and that's an effective anti-nausea agent for more than just migraines.

-"You Just Need to Lose Weight (And 19 Others Myths About Fat People)" by Aubrey Gordon.

-rolling laundry cart. Doesn't have to be this one but if you CAN roll your laundry to and fro from the machines, do it.

-"Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" by Lundy Bancroft. If you Google, you can usually find a free pdf floating around.

-"The Vagina Bible," by Dr. Jen Gunter.

-satin scrunchies. Wet Brush. Terry cloth lined shower cap. AOA terry cloth hair turban (way, way better than similar ones from drugstore).

-stretchy work pants.

-bra liners. For large-chested people who tend to get sweaty underboob, this is a life-saver.

-Goo Gone.

-Dr. Scholls medicated foot powder and the Earth Therapeutics tea tree oil foot spray. The foot powder works for super long days and the spray for lighter days.

-Reflective heat pad. I use this on my car seat in the winter and I am so happy for that every single chilly morning. I've repurchased it... once or twice? now.

-Retin-A. I used to use Differin, which is adapalene, the most potent retinoid available over the counter, but the switch to prescription-only Retin-A has been very noticeable. Decreased wrinkles, clearer skin. More inclined to flake and burn but it's worth it for me.

-Red LED therapy. Near-infrared stimulates collagen production in the skin. The only other thing that really does that is retinoids. I bought the Omnilux mask, which is certainly high-end, but HotandFlashy (a YouTube content creator) did a great comparison of different masks available by specs and this was the best at the time. The difference is noticeable within days. I've tried other, lower-powered masks, but what made me make the jump to high-end was that I got the Dennis Gross red LED eye mask for crows' feet off eBay and I was like "holy shit, this is better." And Omnilux is better still. It makes sense, since they were the OG of the models that have been in dermatology clinics for a couple of decades now.

-AOA foundation has been at least as good at my TooFaced foundation, and it's like 1-2 bucks instead of 40. There are light, medium, and deep shades, each on different pages; I'm linking to light because that's what I use. The lightest shade works for me, and I'm basically translucent.

-AOA VitaGlow tinted moisturizer is absolutely my go-to for lighter coverage days.

-AOA PawPaw blending sponges. Best out there and also the cheapest.

-(do not buy any of the AOA eyeshadows. Total waste of time, zero pigment. I've tried repeatedly and they're just garbage. The highlights are generally fine though.)

-Direct acid foot peels. The calluses come off. Just don't do it when you have ANY open wound on the feet, because it's acid and will sting like hell.

-blendercleanser solid cleanser for blending sponges and brushes. Actually a) gets them clean and b) rinses out.

-PureWine wine wands. I let these puppies sit for three minutes in a glass and suddenly I can drink red wine without migraines or hangovers. Fucking miraculous.

-Dustbuster. Holy shit it's amazing for ADHD peeps. Small thing bugging you? Can't get yourself to bust out the "real" vacuum? USE THIS.

-Crocs. Don't @ me. I wear a black pair around the house and for garden chores and they make my feet happy. Salonpas patches and/or BenGay for a topical when you're sore--topicals are great pain relief.

-Vibrating neck pillow. Don't need it right now? Wait until your next head cold. Vibration clears sinuses.

-PooPourri. I love not having to smell poop. This, and similar products, work pretty well by trapping scent particles in the oil layer instead of letting them evaporate into the air.

-Electric snow thrower. I can't manage a large, heavy snow blower and I don't want to deal with a gas engine. This little guy helped me clear my large driveway in 3-4 hours instead of 12.

-The Demon-Haunted World: Science as a Candle in the Dark, by Carl Sagan.

-Handheld home IPL for hair removal. I ordered this exact one and I like it. You can get these on eBay or Amazon for cheaper sometimes; just make sure you PROTECT YOUR EYES during flashes. Targets pigment in the hair bulb so lighter skin and darker hair work better, and deeper skin tones may burn.

-Lanolin chapstick. Makes all other chapsticks I've used look like garbage.

-Steam eye masks. ShopMissA sells these and you can find them on a lot sites; shouldn't cost more than about a dollar per mask. I ended up buying an electric eye mask because I wanted to treat my dry eye and that just felt more environmentally responsible, but I love falling asleep with these on and I can't do that with my plug-in mask.

I think this is where I'll leave it--I've gone back quite a ways in my shopping history across multiple sites and thought about my daily routines--but if any of these problems torture you, these are my suggestions.

[charliegyrth]

Alex Gets Soft - Part 22 (FINAL)

Our Big, Fat Epilogue

Read Part 21 here.

Twelve months later, Alex and I returned to the beach where it all started. We walked down the same path, though our pace was much slower now.

We hadn’t been here since that fateful day when our lives changed forever. I’d really wanted to return, but I knew that all the walking would be difficult, so we agreed to save it for a special occasion: the day Alex passed 350.

Well, that day finally arrived, and here we were. The breeze stroked my skin. The sun shined off the sweat streaks that ran down Alex’s bare chest.

Once again, everyone stared as we passed, but this time, they weren’t just staring at Alex. They were staring at us both. The muscle god and the double-belly blob.

Throughout the year, I’d continued pushing myself further in the gym. A month after my Chicago trip, I got a subscription to LA Fitness because I needed something more than the equipment and weights that we had at home. This was a big game-changer for me, mostly because I made a new group of friends who gave me both pointers and encouragement.

For a few months, I got a bit obsessive. (I even considered steroids, but Alex thankfully talked me out of it.) I’ve calmed down since then, but I still lift weights as often as my body allows. Because of my increased size, I’ve sacrificed some flexibility in favor of strength. This affected us a bit in the bedroom, but as always, we were able to adapt.

Now, I’m 230 pounds of solid muscle. I’ve developed a lumbering walk, my arms constantly spread to my sides. I can no longer lift my arms straight up, either, because my shoulder muscles get in the way. My neck has completely disappeared and my abs jut out into what looks like a belly but is really just muscle over muscle. Ropey veins cover my arms and legs. It took a lot of time (and a lot of pep talks from Alex) to get me to accept those.

And my shortness is no longer something that embarrasses me. In fact, it feels like a secret weapon. Muscles grow faster on short guys. And I enjoy my overall stumpy look. I feel compact.

“I… need another break,” Alex wheezed. He leaned against me as I took him to a bench. The wood creaked as he flopped down. While he gasped for air, I pulled a thermos out of my backpack. He’d gone five minutes without stopping, so he deserved a treat.

I jogged in place, waiting for his breathing to slow down. Once it finally did, he downed the thermos in a single gulp.

He expected me to give him another, but we were just a block away from the ice cream shop.

But when he looked at me with his puppy-dog eyes, I couldn’t resist. I swapped his empty thermos for a full one. We still had plenty more in my backpack.

Those shakes had become an addiction for him. I lost count of how many he finished in a day. I did 100% of the cooking and food-prep myself, so I liked to surprise him with different flavors. This batch was weight gain powder, butter, heavy cream, and rocky road. He usually drank them too fast to notice the flavor, though.

As you can imagine, those shakes were a huge factor is his journey to 350. So were all the boxes of snacks. For a while there, he was eating more of those than we could afford, even with my higher salary. To slow things down without losing calories, he started dipping each one in either syrup or cream. This left the couch and table constantly sticky, but it worked.

And of course, he continued with at least three massive meals each day. After I returned from Chicago, he stopped making the same dinner every night. (He stopped cooking entirely.) Instead, we tried to switch things up each day. Sometimes, I encouraged him to scarf things down as usual. But usually at dinner, I made him go slower. I worked hard to please him, and I needed to know that he tasted at least some of my food.

Other than that, we hadn’t changed our food strategy too much. I just made sure to slowly increase the amounts.

Oh, and I stopped feeding him while he slept. It was fun while it lasted, but we discussed it and decided that it was better if he knew everything that went inside him.

That was the other aspect of this past year, probably the most important one: Our constant communication. It’s hard at times, but we try to be mindful that our lives are more than just eating and working out. We have friends and hobbies and jobs (though Alex works exclusively from his bed now). We go to the movies once a month. We watch reality shows. We even visit the community swimming pool (the one physical activity that Alex could still do without struggling).

We’re happy.

And throughout this journey, Alex has grown into the sexiest man I could ever imagine. I know that 350 really isn't a lot for someone of his height, but trust me, it is. The raw numbers have never accurately reflected how he looks.

His arms are decorated with hanging flab that sways at the slightest movement. His thighs are the texture of the moon with the softness of a pillow. His ass slopes outward and down (mostly down), a victim of both gravity and constant sitting. His cock has been swallowed up by a fat pad that is so much fun to bury my face in.

And his belly is unlike any you’ve ever seen. His belly bottom is covered by his upper fold, creating an oven-hot crevice that I can’t stop exploring. His lower belly drapes into two dangling lumps that meet directly under where his belly button used to be. That’s the softest, most grabbable part of his whole body, the area he’s most proud of. They merge with his side flab. Not quite love handles anymore, just a continuation of his overhang. And all the skin from his glorious tits to his waist is decorated with wide, pale stretchmarks.

All these changes have piled onto him in quick succession, and I expect more rolls and dimples to develop in the near future. What I don’t expect is for his face to ever change. His cheeks are a bit rounder now and his jawline has softened, but he still has the face of a skinny guy. (Well, at least the face of a chubby guy.)

No other 350-pound person looks quite like him.

I looked down at my work of art, my soulmate, and help him back to his feet. We both knew that more people were staring at us. At about 300 pounds, Alex noticed that people had become more obvious with their stares. They didn’t even bother glancing away or pretending to be looking at something else. He liked that.

We continued all the way to the ice cream shop. Alex wanted to stop one more time, but I made him keep going. By the time he collapsed onto the two chairs I had positioned for him, he was back to gasping.

“What should we get?”

“Ice… cream,” he panted.

So I got twelve different flavors. All larges, except for a medium strawberry for me. The worker helped me carry them all to the table outside. She obviously expected me to have a whole group of people waiting for me, rather than one huffing mountain of draping flesh. Her smile disappeared as she placed the tray onto the table. Then she scurried back inside.

I think she was the one who served us over a year ago.

Alex, who hadn’t used a spoon for a while, scooped up his first bite.

“Remember, Alex. Slowly. We’re savoring this.”

He gobbled it down and scooped again. To him, that was slow.

“Syrup, please.”

I emptied our syrup bottle onto the ice creams.

Three bowls later, a familiar voice shouted at us from the distance. “Alex! Jake!”

It was Rob, rushing over with his four-year-old trailing behind. The kid shook my hand like a tiny businessman. I don’t know. I’m still not a kid person, but this one was growing on me.

“I didn’t expect to see you guys here!” Rob said. He still had his mustache, but now he’d gone bald. His buzzed hair only covered the sides and back of his head. “Terry! Look who I found!”

Terry lumbered toward us, tanned and proudly shirtless. He’d only grown a little since we saw him last month, but this was my first time seeing him shirtless since his twink days. I hadn’t realized how prominent his beer gut had gotten. Packed tight. Not a single bit of jiggle.

He’d beaten Alex to 350 by a few weeks. (They had a barbecue to celebrate.)

Alex looked up from his ice cream, his eyes wide. “You look just like him.”

“Who? Oh, him.” Alex had told them many times about the guy at the beach, the man who had changed our lives completely without ever knowing it. “Thank you. And I mean that. All your advice, you helped me get reach my goal.”

Rob patted his husband’s gut. That was about as affectionate as they got in front of their kid. (Though Braxton was already inside, picking out ice cream flavors for his dad.) “So what do you think?” he asked Alex. “Isn’t he the perfect man?”

I waited anxiously for my boyfriend’s answer.

Alex reflexively grabbed his belly hang and molded it under his ice-cream-coated fingers. “He’s solid. But I prefer something a little different.”

The End.

Thank you all so much for reading! This was the very first gainer story that I had the courage to publish, and I'm stoked that so many of you stuck it out to the end. It was an absolute joy to write, and it went in a much different direction than I had planned. (The narrator's body transformation kind of surprised me as I wrote it.)

Like everything I write, this story will always be free on Tumblr, but you can also buy the full ebook (with a bonus story) if you're interested. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22

And you can find all my stories here.

[hometoursandotherstuff]

According to the description, this 1987 manor style home in Mcmurray, PA is newly remodeled to meet a Medieval Aesthetic. 6bds, 7ba, $999,900. Medieval? You tell me.

I do not recall the Medieval style having gold floral wallpaper.

Matching powder room.

I'm gonna say Italian Provincial, especially the gold angel above the fireplace.

Where the hell are they getting Medieval from?

Maybe the light fixture can loosely be called Medieval. I like the color of the double sink.

The cabinets and flooring are lovely. I like the black counters, also. Not sure about the wallpapered ceiling, though.

Wow, this is some fancy everyday dining area off the kitchen. When I saw the picture on the table, I thought it was an office.

This may be the fanciest laundry room I've ever seen.

Youch! Look at this dining room. Carved beams. There's a knight and stuff. I guess you could call this Medieval on Steroids.

Look at the bar. Wow, fancy Medieval style. They even have what looks like a church window from an architectural salvage yard. I'm disappointed that the rest of the house isn't like this.

Stunning wood in the office, plus a fireplace. Look at the ceiling. I imagine that this could be a library or den if you don't need an office.

The primary bedroom takes us back to the castles of Italy with the cherub mural on the ceiling.

Roman en-suite.

The bedrooms are very large. I wonder if this is the primary. It's very big and has a fireplace.

The en-suite has a vanity table and a marble tub surround.

Or, maybe this is the primary. I can't tell. The carpet needs to be stretched, there's an office in the corner and doors to the patio.

Look at the Zen statue in the niche and the and the etched mirrors. This is a serene retreat. This home's decor is all over the place, but that's okay.

A child's bedroom. Very sophisticated.

Interesting. An architectural salvage church pew and what looks like a confessional simulation.

Looks like we're in an attic family room.

Cool enclosed patio has a pool, hot tub, shrine, statues, sitting area, and a mural. Looks like a castle back here.

Very interesting home. I'd buy it. Looks like there's a tower- I wonder if there's a turret room.

.54 acre lot on a cul-de-sac.

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/107-Treetop-Ln-McMurray-PA-15317/49791444_zpid/?