#Steve: unless you break my heart you have nothing to worry about | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chaseadrian · 2 years

Text

graze, blaze, haze

—day 4. shotgunning // [kinktober masterlist] Argyle doesn't care that you don't know how to use a bong, and he definitely doesn't care when his lips touch yours. Except, he really does, and so do you.

pairing. argyle/f!reader wc. 2.2k tags. 18+ ONLY, facesitting, making out, first kiss, marijuana use, friends to lovers, nipple play, blowjobs, premature ejaculation

“It just seems overly complicated to me. Can’t you make like, brownies or something? I’d rather eat my drugs.”

Argyle sits between your legs on the floor, a green pipe with scattered burn marks on the glass in his lap, “No can do, my friend, not unless I want the Byers’ kitchen to smell rank for a week.”

You tug a little too hard on the brush in your hand, catching a knot at the back of his head, but he doesn’t give sign of irritation or even acknowledgement. You comb your fingers through the strands where the knot was, a little pang of guilt in your chest. If he felt the pull, he would’ve ignored it anyway.

Argyle was the first guy in your life to even let you touch his hair, much less take a pair of scissors to it. Steve would run screaming, Eddie wanted his wild and unkempt, nothing but soap and water allowed, and you wouldn’t dare try to undermine Joyce’s home haircuts, no matter how dated they were becoming.

No, he was the first, and it’d become so commonplace that he felt comfortable enough spinning out of his mind on his west coast weed while you held sharp scissors to his hair.

You’re spinning out on your own right now, butterflies thumping in your stomach as he sits against you, an arm thrown over your knee. That was another thing about him, the touch. The puritanical culture of Hawkins—with hands by your side and prayers to stave off temptation—was antithetical to Argyle’s whole deal. He didn’t think twice about wrapping an arm around your shoulder, or pressing his palms into your cheeks during an anxious tirade. It was hard not to take it for something more than what it was, your heart in your throat every time he made contact.

“I’m telling you I literally can’t do it, then.” You say, smoothing your hand over his hair, trailing the brush as it breaks through what few knots he has, “I always forget to move my finger or hold my breath too long or inhale an ember and have a full breakdown because I think there’s a hole burned in my throat. I just like, can’t use a fucking bong or pipe or anything.”

You set the brush down, letting out a frustrated sigh, and he pats the side of your knee, “Hey, no worries, I got you.”

He leans down and takes a long pull from the pipe, twisting around to face you, his hand coming to the back of your head, bringing you close. Without conscious effort, your jaw drops and he leans in just enough to blow the smoke into your mouth, his bottom lip grazing yours as he turns away. As if that’s the most normal thing in the world. As if you can’t feel the heat from his mouth still on your lips. As if you aren’t frozen in place while your nerves shake more from the intoxication of Argyle’s lips than the effects of the smoke.

Several minutes pass in silence, his head resting on your inner thigh, thumb scraping at the loose threads of torn denim on your knee. You grab the brush and start combing his hair out again, shaking off the moment, reorienting yourself in friendship. You can deal with the longing and the butterflies, maybe, probably.

At the very least, you can survive as long as things stay at the same level as they've been. Your hands on his hair, him comfortable between your legs.

“You want more?” He asks after several more minutes of calm silence, and you consider saying no, but there’s a light buzz under your skin that makes you say, “Yeah, uh, yeah, totally.”

You brace yourself this time, squeezing the brush handle tight in your fingers, mouth open a little wider, hopefully a failsafe against his lips touching yours.

When he brings you down this time, though, you don’t keep them open. You close them for a kiss.

It’s a small peck, barely there, but he stares at you with surprise, and the smoke escapes when his lips fall open, a quiet ‘woah’ in the air between you. You watch his eyes flick up, can almost actually see the gears turning in his brain, and just as you’re leaning back away from him, he starts to smile.

It turns into a full grin, his eyes glassy and shining, staring blatantly at your lips.

You both slip into the next moments with ease, leaning down to kiss him again, mouth warm and bitter and soft. He kicks over the bong as you slide into his lap, murky water and gray ashes spilling onto your carpet.

“Shit, sorry, dude,” He tries to break from you to clean it up, but you pull a dirty shirt from behind you on the floor and throw it over the mess.

“Literally don’t care.” You speak against his mouth, leaving space between kisses for him to relax back into it.

“You sure?” He asks, his eyes still fixed on the lump under the shirt.

“Mhm.” You kiss the corner of his mouth, his cheek, the soft curve of his jaw, and finally you feel him melt into you.

His hand rests over your thigh, fingers pressing into the jeans, and he slides down to the crook of your knee, pulling you closer in his lap. He isn’t firm with his touch, more a guiding hand than a driving force, but you curl entirely into him, your arms slung around his neck.

It’s quickly apparent that he’s content to follow your lead, his tongue only slipping into your mouth after you’ve pushed yours into his, his hand only running over your breast once you’ve put it there.

You pull back, “Argyle.”

His lips are plump and red, and he’s surprised to break away from the kiss, his voice full of air, “Huh, yeah, what?”

“You sure you’re in the right headspace for this?” You ask, running your hand down his arm.

“Y—yeah, no, I’m—I’m—” He starts nodding, his eyes wide, hands pressing firmer against you. There’s nothing to read off him but enthusiasm, and he welcomes you back to his mouth with a full, open mouthed kiss. It’s sloppy and wet, and you want more. You both fall into a sloven, messy rhythm, your mouths too busy to care what your hands are doing until the clothes on your body become restrictive.

Your shirt is the first to go, breasts dropping from under the oversized tee, and Argyle’s hands come quickly over them. He palms them like dough, runs his knuckles over your nipples until they’re taut, the focus that was on your mouth centers instead on your breasts. You don’t know that anyone has marveled at you like this before.

“Unreal,” He whispers, interrupted by a giggle as you slip your hands under his shirt.

You smile at him as you take the layers off, “Ticklish?”

He holds back a laugh, pursing his lips and tilting his head up at you, “I may very well be.” He says, fingertips make their way over your skin until it’s you that can’t help giggling.

“Oh, ticklish?” He mocks, and you wrap your arms around his bare chest, bringing him back for another kiss.

The heat of his chest on yours is unbearable, and it’s not long before you’re both down to your underwear.

You straddle him on the floor, one hand grabbing at the warm flesh of his biceps as his arms lay flat beside his head. You lean over him on one elbow, fingers knotted at the top of his hair, sucking hickeys into his neck. His moans are loud sighs rather than palpable noises, breath shaking and uneven. The firm print of his dick under his boxers grows against your pelvis, and you press down into him, backing away to watch how his features shift. The slow grind of your hips has him grabbing at your breasts again, and he pulls you up to his mouth, sucking kisses around the flesh before his lips close over your nipple.

He swirls his tongue over the pebbled skin, flicking back and forth, a quiet hum vibrating over your skin from the back of his throat. His hands come down to your ass, and he pulls back from you, licking his bottom lip, and almost lifting you up to his face.

“Ope, wait, shit,” You topple over as he tries to bring you closer, catching yourself with a hand on his shoulder. He offers a lopsided smile, and an earnest, “Woah, my bad,” his fingers tapping along your inner thigh.

You stand up beside him and slide the panties off, swallowing hard before you kneel back down over him. This isn’t something you know about from anything other than the jeering ‘hey, sit on my face, sweetheart!’ comments you’d gotten from boys growing up. They felt more like a mockery than a genuine proposition, but Argyle’s hands rest delicate atop the front of your thighs, and he encourages you to settle down against his mouth.

His tongue slips between your lips, flat over the wet stripe of skin, just nicking the top of your clit. Almost immediately, the pressure is insurmountable, and you let your weight drop a little more. He starts slow, with lazy licks up and down, side to side, just slicking you up with spit.

You lean back and rest your hands on either side of his stomach, fingers firm in the plush skin, letting your head fall as he works you. He tilts his head forward, prodding the tip of his tongue against your clit, quick circles around the bundle of nerves, a kiss here and there. His touch is intentional, if a bit hesitant, but you can feel his confidence grow as you push harder into him, almost forgetting to care if you’re suffocating him.

Sharp spikes flock up your body as the pressure mounts, and you lean forward to grind on his face, firm tongue laid flat over your cunt. Again, he’s ready to let you take the lead, but a few well placed licks send you careening into your orgasm, hips sputtering on top of him. He nuzzles his face deeper between your legs as you ride through it, shaking his head back and forth, and you squirm over him trying to get away.

It’s now that he holds you, arms wrapping around your thighs, not letting up until he can hear you trying to catch your breath.

You fall backwards, your head at his waist, hands rubbing over your face with exasperated groans.

“You good?” He asks, and you can hear the satisfaction in his voice. Any nerves he’d had coming into this were well on their way out.

“Yeah, fuck, good.” Lifting your hand in the air, you shoot him a thumbs up before rolling off onto the floor, the carpet colder than your bare stomach. You fold your arms in front of you and tilt your head to look at him, catching sight of the wet patch on his underwear.

“I—uh, well,” He clears his throat and watches you push up onto your knees.

“Are you all good?” You ask, slipping two fingers under the waistband of his boxers and sliding them down to release his softening erection.

“Totally, super good,” His voice catches in his throat when you drag your tongue over his dick. It twitches while you continue to lap up the sticky, salty cum that’s dribbled down the tip, and Argyle lets his head fall back with a thud! before combing a hand through his hair.

You take him entirely in your mouth, surprised at his length, but willing to choke on it for whatever residual bit of pleasure you’re giving him. His fingers play at the back of your head, wanting but not willing to push you down. He threads them instead between strands of hair, quiet, airy moans and involuntary spasms spurring you on.

More than content on your knees, content with the feeling of his hand grazing down your skull, you decide to yourself that the only stopping point here is when his dick starts to soften. You squeeze at his inner thighs with one hand, breaking your lips away to kiss marks that’ll be visible when he wears shorts. You don’t feel entitled to claim him as yours, there’s weed and adrenaline running through you both, but it doesn’t feel like a one-off. Wrapping your lips around him again, you press your tongue to his underside as you bob up and down, moist suction sending tangible shivers through his body.

He taps at your shoulder, and you look up to see him staring slack jawed at the ceiling.

“Yeah?” You mutter, wiping your mouth.

“Maybe I’m not in the right headspace anymore,” His voice is flat, eyes wide, breathing heavy, “Think I’m like, way far out beyond any headspace.”

You laugh, and drag a blanket from your bed, throwing it over your bare bodies.

He slides a hand under you, still staring blankly at the ceiling as you curl up to him.

“Argyle?” You tilt your head to look at him, and he hums.

“That was like…okay, right?”

The question breaks him from his stupor, and he looks at you with gaping awe, blinking a few times before he speaks, “That was so far past okay, I don’t know how I lived without it, know what I mean.”

You press a kiss to his jaw, and settle into him, “Yeah, absolutely I do.”

#kinktober #argyle/reader #argyle/you #argyle x you #argyle x reader #argyle x y/n #argyle fic #my writing #mine

251 notes · View notes

munsonsreputation · 2 years

Text

Soon You'll Get Better

PROLOGUE

↢ series masterlist | chapter one ↣

series summary: this story takes place a year after the events in season three. max is closed off, dealing with her pain and loss her own way--isolation and self deprecating. she knows that billy was never the best brother yet she still feels this pain. a pain that doesn't go unnoticed by steve harrington and his girlfriend, who try their best to fill the roles in max's life with the hopes that she knows she's never alone and she'll get better soon.

: ̗̀➛ warnings: none for this part :D

A year may seem like a long time to reflect on what happened in the past. But unless your year includes some secret Russian base, a shitload of possessed mind-flayers, and a dead brother—a year is never going to be enough.

Max Mayfield, the true victim of last summer, had lost it all. Her half-brother, Billy, her step-father, and sometimes, it even feels like she lost her mom. But the one person she truly lost and could never really find was herself. She didn’t know how to navigate life after what had happened that summer. All of her friends seemed to be able to walk away from StarCourt with a piece of them still left to hold on to, but she had nothing.

The young girl would do her very best to not be so affected by the loss she faced, knowing Billy was never nice to her and her stepfather instilled fear in the home, but there was always yearning burning inside of her. Questions of what would’ve happened if Billy had survived. Would their relationship be mended? Could she finally have someone to look after her?

These questions infiltrated her mind like the regret she had for not being a good enough sister to him. For not taking the time to understand him and try to break his shell. Nights were spent alone, crying in her bed looking at photographs of her and Billy that her mom made them take. And days were filled with putting on a mask in front of her friends because she didn’t want them to worry.

It might have fooled everyone. Her laughs and smiles seemed genuine, and maybe they really were, but deep down it wasn’t all butterflies and rainbows for her.

In fact, it was the exact opposite.

Her heart was wrenching apart every second she had to see Nancy and Mike share an affectionately awkward hug. She held back tears when Hopper talked to Jonathan and Will as if they were his own kids. And her soul hurt a little more when all the moms would holler for her friends after spending too many hours at the arcade.

All the while she had no sibling to hug. No father to talk to. And a mother who was too busy working to care about her spending her day at a silly arcade playing Pac-Man and worrying about someone beating her high score.

No one picked up on it, but sooner or later someone would. And maybe she would be able to get better.

a/n: again, a big thank you to @translatemunson for helping me with this series!!! as of right now, i don't have a posting schedule set for this series so my apologies if you'll be waiting...i don't want to stress myself out and put pressure on writing so i hope you all understand <3 i am working on chapter one right now and i'm striving for it to be out sometime next week so keep an eye out for that...so excited for you all to read!!!

taglist (if you would like to be added just leave a comment!): @translatemunson @kennedy-brooke @manda-panda-monium @tvserie-s-world

75 notes · View notes

lavendermunson · 10 months

Text

i could see you as my addiction - steve harrington

chapter 3 of miss americana and the heartbreak prince

summary a perfect date makes you forget about all the worries, the insecurities and the future. even if this time you weren't careful, who's keeping tabs anyway?

content warnings +18. some mentions of insecurities, so much fluff. allusions to sex. dry humping. slight nipple play. heavy make out, touching. no p in v next time babes.

w.c 3.5k

series masterlist | previous chapter | next chapter

Something is wrong, something is definitely wrong.

You find yourself sitting on the sofa at your private studio, no one joined you today since you came in a rush trying to come up with the melody for a song you wrote, about him.

But it’s odd, nothing comes out of your head, and you let your fingers linger on the strings of one of your favorite guitars, the one with flowers painted by one of your artist friends. It’s been two hours and nothing comes to your head, not even the first note. If you could, you would smash this guitar right on the floor so it breaks, you are sure it’s some type of curse, usually, you lose sleep working but right now you are too tired to do so, and truthfully, your mind has been thinking about another thing, Steve.

Not necessarily on his large hands, his cute face, or his soft lips. No, it’s the worry that eats you alive. You wish the sofa could swallow you whole and teleport you to another universe where life is easier, when your life is not printed in newspapers and your face isn’t in every corner of the city. You love your life but it’s overwhelming, more so when it comes to dating, to love. Past mistakes tattooed in your head, dreadful memories and bad luck, seems like you are not worthy of love and you’ve been believing in it until you saw him.

Robin is right, she always is. Some things look like a fairy tale. Like it’s a dream and you are going to wake up, empty-handed and never knowing if someone would ever love you for who you really are.

Your heart starts to ache, your teeth now biting off the rest of the old nail polish making it look chipped now. The buzz of your phone makes you flinch, you look at your hands in disgust and realize you are more than nervous. You catch a glimpse of the screen and see his nickname, causing a smile to spread across your face.

little secret: hey beautiful :)

about tomorrow… i decided to skip practice, i know, don’t lecture me about it

it would be better if I took a day off to be with you, does that sound okay?

unless you have other plans, i’ll understand but i kind of have a plan so i hope i am lucky enough for you to take a day off with me

The typing bubble goes away indicating it’s your time to reply. Steve never sends so many texts in a short span of time, was he nervous? Anxious? Excited? You had a combination of the three emotions sitting right at the top of your belly.

you: hi handsome <3 yes, absolutely! all day with you sounds perfect.

don’t worry, no lecture for today because I know how good you are at what you do. where are we going?

little secret: do you wanna make me blush?

uh, it’s a place a couple of hours away from the city… a farm, garden… i don’t know a friend owns it and we can have all the privacy we want

Perfect, privacy. Not that you don’t want to scream the world that you are dating the most perfect guy, but it’s exactly what you need, some moment alone with him.

you: privacy? to do what? ;)

little secret: oh i have a few things in mind…

You joke, trying to get rid of your nerves. But you blush at his reply.

little secret: eight am sounds good? Is it too early? i’ll pick you up

you: no, it’s perfect. i’ll send you my address!

little secret: great, have a nice day beautiful

you: you too, handsome <3 can’t wait to see you again

——

The next day comes, and you are hyper-aware of your nerves as you look in front of the mirror. You’ve changed your outfit at least five times, the room is full of clothes on the floor. You shouldn’t worry about it but you are, you want this to be perfect.

It’s almost eight am and the only thing you can think about is how are you going to get out of the city without being seen and followed. You guess Steve has it covered but… what if he doesn’t?

Sixth change of outfit and last, you fix the hem of your skirt and put on some cherry chapstick, this time you went for a natural make up look to be more comfortable. You get your purse closed and sit on the couch while you check social media. It has never been your favorite hobby but it’s quite gratifying to see your friend’s faces and their new adventures.

Robin’s “good luck” text pops up on your screen, You thank her and moments later Steve arrives.

You prepare yourself for what's coming, praying everything goes well and that your nerves won't eat you alive.

“Hi, beautiful. You look amazing” he says, standing close to the black SUV. He leans in to leave a kiss on your cheek and hand you a bouquet of flowers.

“Hey handsome” you blush at the feeling of his lips against your face, something you are addicted to. “These are so pretty, you really didn’t have to”

“Or course i did, i have to spoil you”

He winks and takes your hand to help you get into the vehicle, you see it’s completely dark so no one can look into it.

——

After the total chaos of switching cars in an empty dark parking lot and Steve’s driver keeping the secret of you two together, you are now in a quieter part outside of the city. The road looks empty, it’s a place you’ve never visited but you get intrigued at how calm it is. Your hair flows with the wind thanks to Steve’s old and classic convertible, the sun hits his face when you look at him. Sunglasses sit on the bridge of his nose and you miss that spark in his eyes whenever he sees you. His hand lingers on your thigh, feeling your hot skin under his soft fingertips, his hand keeps moving up with seconds and you let your body relax, your back pressed against the seat.

The radio has been playing old songs and there’s a quick change to modern songs. The first one is a new song from your friend Vickie, following up it’s one of Corroded Coffin’s most popular songs and then you hear a melody too familiar.

“Oh, I love this song” his hand travels from your thigh to the radio’s tuning knob to turn the volume up. Missing the feeling of his warm hand on your skin, you take his hand in yours and place it on your thigh again.

He grins at you while the song starts to play louder and you hear your voice.

“No, no, no!” you cover your face with your palms, shaking your head as you hide the red tint on your cheeks.

“What? I love this song, it’s fun” Steve sings along, surprised he knows the words when you look at him with a smile on your face. A laugh falls off your lips when he gets to the chorus, screaming the lyrics of your song.

“It's time, oh-oh. I don't know about you, but I'm feeling twenty-two” he keeps singing, taking your hand up in the air and dancing. “Everything will be alright if you keep me next to you” he takes a quick look at you, dedicating your own words to you.

You eventually join him, not only singing your song but a few that pop up on the radio, making the ride smoother, feeling like it went away quicker and you finally arrive at your destination.

“I’m sorry about your ears,” he says, letting go of the steering wheel and taking the keys out of the ignition. A frown forms on your face, watching every one of his movements.

“Sorry for what?”

“Your ears, I know I am a really bad singer but I do love music!” His laugh is contagious, seeing him smile so much is a thing that will be in your head forever.

“Don’t worry, I don’t know how to play baseball so I think we are even”

“Are you admitting I'm a bad singer?”

“No, no I didn't mean it like that”

As soon as the car comes to a full stop, he gets out and rushes to your side, holding the door open for you and extending his hand to assist you in getting out. You take his hand and step out of the car, accidentally bumping chests with him.

“I didn’t mean it like that” you repeat.

“I know, honey”

He takes off his glasses, placing them on the collar of his shirt and his free hands find your waist. You do the same and tangle your arms around his neck, getting closer to him and brushing your lips with his in a quick kiss.

“I can teach you to play and some other things” he whispers on your lips, you nod and close the gap between you quickly.

As his lips move against yours, his hands squeeze your waist and his tongue finds its way into your mouth, it bumps with yours making him groan. Your head leans to the side to give him more access, the kiss becomes quicker, hotter and you feel so desperate to get more of his taste. Cigarettes, mint and a dash of cherry from your lips. He pulls away to take some air and looks at you with a smile, your chest rises up and down quickly as you try to do the same.

“I- we should get inside and eat something. I’m starving”

You pinch your brows together, knowing how you both seem to push each other when it gets too much. Just like you at the concert, afraid that anyone will see you and start to scream. Anxiety sits on your stomach again, knowing that even if no one is watching you there is always a wall between you and Steve that will be hard to break.

You join him inside the house, it’s small but pretty. Pictures of his coach, Hopper with his wife and kids are all over the walls. They look so happy.

When you ask for a vase for the flowers he shows you where they are, not leaving his sight of what he is getting from behind the kitchen counter.

“I’m ready, let’s go!”

Steve has a picnic basket in his hand and a bottle of wine in the other. You follow him to the back door after placing your flowers in the vase along with some water. There’s a nice, big garden and to a big tree that casts a big shadow that looks like the perfect place for you to sit down and eat, you look around and see a lot of vegetables, fruits, and flowers planted on the floor. You notice the family likes to do gardening and eat fresh food, it all looks perfectly placed and taken care of.

You find Steve on his knees, taking the food out of the picnic basket. There are sandwiches, fruit cut into tiny pieces, a cheese board, and some chocolate truffles. You sit close to him to help him, getting the plates out along with some cutlery and the wine cups.

“You… Did you prepare all of this?” a smile shows on your face, which Steve loves. He nods, pressing his lips together to hide a grin.

“I had a little help but… yeah I did”

“Help? From who?” you ask.

“Uh, my friend Nancy”

You remember her, noticing how she was so close to Robin and it made you smile.

“Nancy, yes. I haven’t officially met her but my best friend, Robin… she couldn’t stop talking about her the other night and I-” Your pause makes Steve’s brows form a frown.

“You okay?” he asks you, not knowing if it’s something he did or hasn't done. He doesn’t know what’s happening but you are completely frozen in your place and your smile disappears.

“Your friend, Nancy. Does she know about us?”

“No, she just- I told her I had a date but I didn't say with who” He lies.

“Does your friend Robin know about us?” he asks, you can see his curious eyes scanning your face.

“No, I- nobody knows. I haven’t told anyone” You lie and it feels very wrong.

Robin is your best friend, you tell each other everything and it is inevitable for you to not tell her but you lie because, of course, you don’t want Steve to be disappointed. He told you this was a secret.

“Oh, yeah, same” he sits down, his back pressed against the tree while he takes a sandwich and starts eating. He looks at you, taking pieces of fruit on your plate and being quiet.

If you asked Steve’s friends, they would tell you he gets distracted pretty easily whenever he is outside his games. He isn’t used to catching when someone needs to be comforted until the other person mentions it, because for him it has to be obvious. If someone is mad, they have to be screaming or making aggressive gestures because that’s how Steve grew up. His parents were always tossing things at each other, when Hopper gets mad he yells, and when Eddie is pissed he calls him an idiot.

But with you, it’s different. When your smile fades away, Steve thinks that it is normal but you are now quiet and not looking at him, he is missing your attention and his brain finally wakes up.

“Is there something wrong?”

When you finally look at him, you get closer to him. Your arms bump with each other and Steve’s arm comes behind your neck to rest on your shoulders and leaves a small kiss on your cheek. He lets out a sigh knowing that he knows you still want to be close to him.

“Speaking hypothetically” Not ready for the answer but pretty impatient for it, you decide to rip the band aid off. “If I told someone else about us, would that be bad?”

You lied to Steve. He lied to you. It’s a rough start but it’s a little lie, something you can manage.

“No, not if you trust that person” Steve bites his lips, your head rests on his chest and he rubs your thigh. “But I think we should keep it between us, still. I- I think it’s more special that way”

But it’s not, and Steve knows. He is used to lying to protect himself, lies are better than saying what he actually feels.

“Totally, it’s more special this way” You try to convince yourself but it’s not working, yet, you try to change the subject and ask him about this house, Hopper, and his kids.

He tells you all of their stories. From meeting him to meeting his kids to his fight with Jonathan and Will’s friends hanging out with him as if he were the babysitter. Eventually, he found a family in all of them even if they aren’t connected by blood.

He asks you how you met Robin, and you start by telling him she has been your friend since you were kids and even though you had nothing in common she has been your rock and you’ve been hers. She is the one you trust more than anyone else.

The sun has been setting down, leaving the sky in a shade of pink and orange but the warmth of the day never leaves. You are not sure of when you got to this, your legs straddling him as his back presses against the tree, the empty plates scattered all over the place while you sit on his lap. His hands are all over your skin, fingertips traveling all the way to your breasts to give them a light squeeze.

You stop kissing his neck leaving soft kisses on his sharp firm jaw and leaving a peck on the corner of his mouth before entangling your lips with his. After giving him permission, your head leans to one side as you cup his face gently, thumb tracing his cheek where his moles rest. Your lips brush against his tenderly, he savors the taste of your cherry chapstick and the remnants of strawberry, chocolate, and wine that make his heart flutter as the way he is becoming addicted to your lips, to you.

As the kiss deepens, your tongues meet for the first time, dancing in a perfect rhythm leaving a trace of passion and longing, an intimate moment you both needed so much. The world seems to disappear around you when one of his arms goes under your skirt to touch the soft skin of your ass, his hands are soft but the warmth of his palms elevates you. His other hand sneaks to the back of your body to unhook your bra with one hand, impressive, you help him get rid of your bra and he breaks away from the kiss to admire your hard nipples under your top.

"You are so fucking pretty" he whispers against your lips, his words tingling on the bottom of your lip before they touch his mouth again.

His hand goes back to squeeze your breasts again, pinching your nipples with his fingers to give you extra pleasure but it's not enough. Your hips start to rock involuntarily against the hard bulge in his pants making him hide his groans over the kiss combined with your low moans. Wetness pooling on your panties as the rough material of his jeans gives you a pleasant ammount of friction.

He is lost in you, in the way you move over him and the way you are kissing him. He has never felt this, he has kissed other girls but no one has earned a place in his heart like you. He is putty in your hands, goosebumps adorning his arms as his heart beats as fast as when he is playing. It's a feeling he has never felt outside the field, the power you have over him is something unmeasurable.

As one of your hands rests over his cheek, the other goes under his shirt to touch every inch of his skin and try to memorize it. You feel the same, lost in him as your heart bumps against your ribs like a hammer. You swear you can see the stars, the questions, and the doubts fading into insignificance as you explore each other's bodies with warmth and desire.

You break from the kiss, both trying to catch your breath as your chest rises up and down. His gaze is heavy on you, looking at your pretty eyes with so much desire and admiration, his hands leave your body to cup your face and squeeze the soft skin of your cheeks.

Steve looks at your face, your perfect glowy eyes making him feel warm.

He smirks at the sight of your flushed cheeks and your pink puffy lips knowing he caused this. You are an angel, he thinks, you are here to save him and to make him happy and he wants to keep you forever.

"If you could look at you the way I do, you'll see how much I want to scream to the world that I like you a lot" Steve hesitates for a moment, being trapped in the lavender haze of your presence and your bodies being connected, tangled.

"I like you so much too, i'd give up the stars just to see your face every night" You look at him with the biggest smile on your face, he leaves a peck on your lips and smiles with the same happiness you are feeling right now.

"Do you think we could-" He gets interrupted by a ring on the kitchen phone, is incredibly loud it makes you both jump. He freezes in his place, not wanting to leave his position, he is so close to you that it makes him crazy.

"You should get that, it could be important"

Steve helps you get up, telling you to wait and not move from where you are. His unfinished question is still on your mind. Do you think we could... what? Have sex? Tell the world we love each other? Wait, does he love you? Do you love him? Already? Is it too soon?

He comes back to you jogging, short of breath and with a sad frown on his face.

"I'm sorry, Nancy just told me I have to get back. Hopper wants to have dinner and if I'm not there he is... I'm sure he is going to kick my ass"

You nod, looking at him with the same sad frown but trying to smile so he doesn't get to read your mind and see your worries. "Don't worry, it's okay Stevie" You know how much Hopper means to him, how Steve feels he owes him so much for helping him get to where he is now.

His heart skips a beat at the nickname, Steve sees you reach down to get your bra back. He is quicker than you and grabs it for you.

"Let me help" A mischievous grin shows on his lips.

You turn around giggling as you take your top off, he sighs when he sees your naked back and the soft fabric of your top on your hands he misses the view he was waiting for, dreaming of.

"C'mon! you are not doing this to me!" Steve yells, defeated as he gets closer to you and helps you put your back on.

"I'm sorry, maybe next time handsome" You tease, a soft chuckle leaves his lips and helps you get dressed, hooking your bra and helping you get your top on again. He hugs you from behind, hiding his face on your neck and kissing it.

His wet kiss turns into a bite, where he starts to suck on your skin to leave a mark. You shut your eyes, appreciating the little sting on your neck, but the smile never leaves your lips knowing he is marking you. No one will know who did it, but everyone will know you already belong with someone.

"I'm sorry we have to go, i really wanted you to stay" his arms lock you in with your back pressed against his chest. "I hope we can see each other again and soon"

"We will, we will see each other many times from now on" Your hand finds his face and then his hair, you play with it for a moment just enjoying this hug before he takes you home.

The night comes, and the day ends. But this is just the beginning.

tags @eddiesguitarskills @hipsternerd9 @afraidofshrimp @rexorangecouny @crowssixof thank you for the support!! (comment if you want to join the tag list!!)

I hope you like this series, feedback is appreciated! don't forget to REBLOG TO SUPPORT THE AUTHOR! . ♡

this chapter is very cute but there's some angst coming...

#leia writes ⊹#steve harrington imagine #steve harrington angst #steve x you #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington au #steve harrington x fem!reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x female!reader #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington x y/n fluff #steve harrington x y/n smut #steve harrington x fem #steve harrington x female reader smut #leia’s ma&thbp #singer!reader #baseball!steve harrington #꒰ leia's steve ⊹ ㅤ꒱

180 notes · View notes

erin-bo-berin · 2 years

Note

I think I have caused some hurt in my heart with this request bc oh my god.

Abbie is a teen now, she’s out doing usual teen things & she comes home late. Her mom & Steve Scold her and she tells her mom she hates her. Reader doesn’t know how to feel and she breaks down crying and walking away. Steve proceeds to go off on her and it turns out really fluffy when she comes into bed with the reader and they hug it out.

if this isn’t something that you wanna do, ignore it, I get it 1000% if you don’t want to -🦋

Ouch my heart. I can’t even imagine how much that has to hurt and now I really regret all the times I yelled at my mom as a teen 😭

I feel like this is the perfect gif for this too lol

Part of the Steve x SingleTeenMom!Reader universe: you can check out the others in this series on my masterlist, if you’re interested ☺️

It was after midnight when your sixteen year old daughter finally walked into the house.

You and Steve sat in the living room, worried to death and angry that she hadn’t called to let you both know that she was going to be late.

“Abrielle!” you called, rarely ever using her full name, unless she was in trouble.

She came in, sighing. What used to be happy smiles and laughter when it came to seeing you and Steve was now met with stubbornness and annoyance, as if she had better things to do. How your heart ached for those days when she was still a baby and didn’t resent you.

“Where were you?! Your dad and I have been worried sick!” you exclaimed.

This hadn’t been the first time she’d been acting out lately. She hadn’t been horrible, necessarily, but she’d been defying rules—natural teenage things Steve had assured you. It still didn’t ease your worries. You had no idea what she was doing anymore and you desperately didn’t want her to end up like you were—18, pregnant and alone.

You wanted so much better for her.

“Relax, mom. Jeez. Me and some friends went out for pizza after the game. It’s no big deal.”

“You could’ve still let us know, Abbie,” Steve said gently.

Steve was always the one to try and ease tensions in the household. With a stubborn teenager that defied you at almost every turn, he was the natural favorite at the moment.

“I was only a little late for curfew, okay?” she shrugged.

“You were an hour and a half late,” you scolded.

“Can’t you lighten up and let me have any fun?!” she shouted.

“Don’t you take that tone with me, missy,” you said, lips pursed tight.

“Why don’t we just all calm down for a minute,” Steve started, but Abbie didn’t let her finish.

“God, I can’t do anything right can I?! You’re always jumping down my throat for something! I hate you!”

Your breath caught in your throat, stunned speechless by your daughter’s words.

You’d had plenty of fights since she’d entered the teenage years, but she’d never said those words to you. You pressed your mouth into a firm line, trying to ward off the tears that threatened to fall. You turned without a sound, heading off to the kitchen, only letting the tears to fall when you’d left the room.

They say that the terrible twos are the worst because of all the tantrums a toddler has as they try to express emotions and feelings they’re experiencing and know nothing about. What they don’t tell you, is that the teenage years are harder. There will be fights, defiance and stubbornness, similar to a toddler’s tantrums. What’s worse is that by this point, they can say some awfully hurtful words, wounding you so deep, you’re not sure how to even express it. You truly don’t know of any other pain similar to it, hearing the child you’ve brought into the world and raised thus far, tell you they hate you.

Even if said in the heat of the moment, you feel like an awful mother.

•

“Abrielle Jade Harrington!”

Steve was absolutely furious and he wasn’t one to lose his tempter often.

“Dad, don’t start,” she groaned, unaffected by her full name from his lips.

“No. You’re going to listen to me and you’re going to sit.”

He pointed a finger to the couch and something on his face must’ve portrayed how deadly serious and insanely angry he was because she dropped on it without another word.

“I have never heard you be more disrespectful to your mother,” he glared at her, “I thought you were better than that.”

“But-”

“Did I say talk? I’m not even close to being finished with you young lady.”

Her mouth snapped closed real quick.

“Your mom spent the entire ninety minutes you were late, pacing, fretting and worrying herself to pieces. She was afraid something happened to you, Abbie. She’s not mad that you went out with your friends. If you’d called and let us know that you wanted to go for pizza, she would’ve let you. I would’ve let you. But you can’t just do what you want and ask for forgiveness later. That’s how we stop trusting you.”

She sat, fidgeting, not looking at him.

“Look at me, please,” he said, a touch softer, but still firm.

She looked up at him, looking miserable.

“I know you were angry and that’s fine. It’s normal to be frustrated and angry. But I won’t tolerate you screaming at us or telling your mother that you hate her. You really hurt her, Abbie. You know how much she loves you, sweetheart.”

By now, Steve’s voice had softened a lot more. He couldn’t help but notice his hands were on his hips and he was wagging a finger at her just like he did to his friends so many years ago.

“I’m sorry, daddy,” she whispered, looking like she meant it.

“I’m not the one you should be apologizing to,” he said firmly, “You know since you broke your curfew, you’re going to have to be punished, right?”

She nodded, miserably.

“Good, because you’re grounded for a week. You’re to come home after school and aren’t allowed to go out with you friends, got it?”

“Yes,” she nodded.

“If you’re good, you can be off punishment by Friday to go out,” he hugged her shoulders, kissing her head, “Love you kiddo.”

“Love you too, daddy.”

•

You sat in bed, trying to concentrate on the words in front of you. The book you were holding wasn’t keeping your attention and you didn’t have the energy to try to make sense of it anyway.

Steve had been earlier to let you know that he’d talked to Abbie, grounding her for a week. You’d just nodded silently, fine with his decision. He’d left to go do something down in the kitchen, promising to be up for bed soon.

All you could hear was her words rattling around in your head.

I hate you.

Hate.

You.

You were definitely too tender hearted for this teenager thing, that’s for sure.

“Mom?”

You looked up and saw Abbie, in her pajamas, fidgeting in the door.

“Can I come in?”

“Of course,” you said, pulling back the covers.

It was something she used to do when she was little, come crawling into bed with you before Steve had come to bed. She’d curl under the covers and face you, sometimes sitting, sometimes laying, but you’d always had the best times just laying there with her.

It was like watching her past and present self at the same time as she climbed into the bed next to you, pulling the covers over her legs and sitting back against the headboard.

“I’m sorry for worrying you tonight. And yelling at you. I don’t hate you, I was just mad,” she said, looking ashamed for her earlier temperament.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. We all get mad sometimes.”

“Yeah, but I shouldn’t have said that. Dad told me it really hurt you.”

You weren’t surprised that Steve had picked up on it. After all these years together he knew you even better than you knew yourself.

“Yeah,” you sighed, “You might understand one day with your own kid, but it does hurt to hear it come from the child you helped create, bring into the world and raise—no matter if it’s toward the father or mother. Any good parent would hate to hear those words.”

“I wasn’t thinking,” she said, shoulders slouching, “I really don’t hate you. I love you so much, I hope you know that mom.”

“I know, Abbie, I know,” you smiled, pulling her to you for a hug, “I love you too.”

“You know,” you said when you pulled away, “You were way too young to remember, but for the first year of your life it was just you and me against the world.”

“Really? I know dad is my adoptive dad legally, even though he’s my real dad, I’ve just never known how old I was when you guys met.”

“You’d just turned one,” you chuckled, “And he fell in love with you at first sight more than he did me, I think.”

“Mom, stop,” she laughed, “I’ve seen pictures of you as a teenager and you’re just as pretty as you are now.”

“Well you’re just biased,” you chuckled.

“Will you tell me the story about how you and dad met? It’s been too long since I’ve heard that one.”

You smiled, launching into the tale again, one you used to tell her all the time as a little girl.

All the while, Steve stood outside the door, eavesdropping, pleased to know peace once again ruled the house.

#steve harrington #steve harrington fic #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x fem!reader #steve harrington x reader #stranger things #stranger things blurb #steve harrington fluff #stranger things fic

343 notes · View notes

captain-tch · 2 years

Text

Ride or Die (Eddie Munson x GN!PlatonicReader)

Your friendship ended months ago to protect him, yet somehow he ended up knowing about the Upside Down. Can you salvage what you've lost? TW: mentions of blood, loss and death.

It was never supposed to be this way. Eddie was supposed to be graduating this year, pouring all of his efforts into walking across that stage and taking that diploma, flipping the bird at everyone who never believed in him. He was never supposed to see someone murdered brutally in front of his eyes, be labelled a killer and have to hide for fear of being locked away for something he didn’t do. He certainly wasn’t meant to be dragged into the mess I’ve been involved with since it all began, was never meant to know of the parallel world that threatened our own.

I had tried so hard to keep this from him, and now, he was subject to the horrors. Everything I had done to protect him was for nothing. All of the lies had put a strain on our friendship, and I wouldn’t have been able to recall the last time we talked. I missed him, I missed his calm demeanour, the way he always brought a goofy smile to my face, the way I was undeniably me around him. I told myself that the price was worth it, that he’d never have to know the reason I couldn’t sleep through the night.

But then Chrissy died.

When I walked into that shed at Reefer Rick’s, I saw how his face dropped. I saw how his guard was up, and I saw how not a single trace of our friendship lingered behind that empty stare.

I hated how Dustin was the one who calmed him down from his spiral. I envied him; I was able to do that up until a few months ago. After the events of StarCourt Mall it hit close to home how easily one of us could die. I didn’t want him to mourn for me, or worse, have to mourn him. So I pushed him away, until he didn’t fight back anymore.

As Dustin told Eddie everything we’d been through, his eyes trained on me the entire time. I shuffled under his piercing gaze, gulping nervously. In all honesty, I wasn’t sure how he’d react.

“You knew?”

I couldn’t avoid his questioning gaze anymore, cracking under the pressure. “Ever since Will went missing.”

“Is that why you blew me off?”

“I -” Steve cut me off.

“We have bigger fish to fry right now.”

“Steve’s right. Right now, we’re more concerned with keeping you safe.”

“Wait, safe from what?”

“Jason has gone ape shit thinking you’re a cult leader who killed Chrissy for a satanic ritual. He’s on the rampage.” Dustin sighed, pointing at me. “You keep an eye on him while we figure out what’s going on.”

“What?” Eddie and I spoke in unison, sharing a questioning look before turning away.

“Not to be rude, but why am I being dubbed the babysitter? That’s Steve’s job.”

Steve snorted. “Not today it isn’t.”

“Just, please, do it for us?” Dustin pleaded. “We’ll be a few hours, tops.”

“Unless you get caught by the cops for breaking and entering.”

“You worry too much.” Dustin smiled, “Besides, seems like you two have a lot of catching up to do. See ya!”

“Wait!” The door shut firmly behind the rest of the team, leaving just me and Eddie, alone. I sighed deeply, leaning my hand against the wall and falling until I hit the floor. I laid there for what felt like eternity, feeling Eddie’s gaze burn into the side of my head.

I couldn’t take it anymore, I snapped. “What?”

“Is hanging out with me really that much of a burden for you?” I could feel the venom in his voice; when I looked up, his face was crestfallen, his attention focused on his hands knotted in his lap.

I sighed deeply, shaking my head. I rubbed the palm of my hand into my eyes. “No, it’s not that.”

“Then what is it? Why did you run away?”

“I -” I swallowed thickly, trying to push past the lump in my throat. This was a moment I had been fantasising about for months, but all I could feel was a deep sadness. There was nothing good about the reason we were talking under these circumstances. A girl had died. It only acted like a dagger in the heart. Why did I push him away, if he was only going to get tangled up in it anyways? A crushing weight fell on my chest, a sudden grief washing over me over all of the memories we could have made.

I couldn’t formulate the words. I couldn’t describe the lead weighing me down, or the total and utter terror I felt when I realised Eddie was in danger just by being associated with me. I didn’t know how to tell him the real reason I pushed him away was, secretly, to protect myself, so I never had to see him perish in the way Max saw Billy suffer.

“That’s fine, I get it. Guess you finally got sick of the freak, huh.” His head bowed. My heart sank. He was already hurting - he witnessed his middle school crush viciously die, had been shunned by the town and felt all alone - and all I was doing was adding to that.

“It's not that.”

A beat of silence passed, then two. He lifted his head to peer at me through the curtains of curly hair, his head quipped to the side. “Then why?”

“Did you not listen to a word Henderson just said?” I huffed a dark laugh, shaking my head. I rubbed a hand across my jaw, finding myself focusing on the opposite wall to stop myself from breaking down. “This is some heavy shit, okay. It’s not like D&D where you can pause the campaign to take a pee break or you can die and create another character. This is,” the thickness of my throat choked the rest of my words.

I stood up abruptly, storming out the door. It slammed with a thud behind me. I took in a big gulp of air, closing my eyes and I breathed in, and out, and in, then out. I calmed down my racing heart, banishing the images playing behind my eyes from my mind. I squeezed my eyes tightly to remove the image of Billy hanging in the air, mouth spewing blood. I shook my head to erase the image of Bob being torn apart, Joyce’s anguished cries breaking my heart.

A hand landed on my shoulder.

A shriek ripped out of me. I shrugged the hand off, feeling my muscles tense as I darted around, fists clenched to see… Eddie, standing a few feet away with his palms raised in surrender. Instantly my muscles relaxed. A wave of exhaustion invaded my body.

“Don’t do that.” I breathlessly warned, pinching the bridge between my brows.

“I’m sorry, I called your name like a thousand times.” Eddie’s eyes raked up and down my body, his eyes soft with concern. “Are you okay?”

I brushed the question aside. “Let’s get back inside.”

Eddie followed me wordlessly back into the shed, lingering close. He closed the door gently behind him, leaning on the wood. He watched me silently as I paced up and down, feeling the urge to release all of my pent up energy.

“So,” he sent me a teasing smirk. “What are your new friends like?”

I wanted to tell him that they were nothing in comparison to Eddie. Sure, they were great for saving the world, but everyone in that group already had their person. Steve had Robin, Nancy had Jonathan, the kids had each other. I always felt like a spare piece when we were hanging out when the world wasn’t in danger. We were trauma bonded and I would always feel close to them - never in the way I felt about Eddie.

A small smile graced my lips. “They’re okay, but for some reason no one wants to graffiti the school at 3AM.”

Eddie’s face mirrored mine. “Remember when the cops showed up?”

“I ran so fast I got a cramp.”

His face lit up. “They seem like a bunch of buzzkills.”

“I mean, they have saved the world three times. Got to give them some credit.”

“They lose points for the lack of graffiti.”

“I agree.”

My cheeks were starting to hurt with the strength of my smile. The words tumbled out before I could reign them back in. “God, I’ve missed you.”

Just like that, the happy moment was shattered. The smile dropped from his face and a look I hadn’t seen before clouded his features. He didn’t say another word, retreating into a corner turning his back to me. The knife in my heart twisted. I caused this. I made him unhappy. I wanted to protect him; all I ended up doing was hurting him.

We carried on in this pattern. Talking, being on the brink of reconciling and then falling apart all over again. I hated it, and no matter how hard I tried to fix it, nothing worked. I tried talking to him in the boat whilst trying to find Watergate, I tried to talk to him while in the Upside Down after following Steve in, and I tried talking to him whilst he sat in the trailer waiting for everyone to get the weapons. Each conversation we had sent us further and further away from the friendship we once shared and I hated it to my core.

I vowed to try one more time. If it didn’t work, then I’d accept the consequences and mourn the relationship we once had.

I waited until we dropped Max, Erica and Lucas off at the Creel house before I approached him. He was staring out of the window of the motorhome, gazing distantly at the scenery passing by. Dustin saw me walking closer, glancing between the pair of us.

“I’m just gonna go over there.” Dustin bolted to his feet, moving out of sight. I took up the seat where Dustin was sat, playing with my fingers. After so many attempts to reconcile, I wasn’t entirely sure how to start. Luckily, Eddie did the job for me.

“You again.” Eddie muttered, his attention still on the world outside.

I huffed a nervous laugh, “Yeah, me again.”

“What do you want?” He sounded so defeated. I wanted to reach out and hug him the way I used to - I knew I no longer had that privilege.

“I just wanted to talk -”

“About what, huh?” Eddie interrupted me, finally breaking his eyes away from the glass. He stared at me, a disbelieving curve to his lips. “I think we’ve already established that you ran away because you're you. Don’t worry, I’m used to it.”

All of the hope rushed out of my body. With a deep breath, I pushed myself upright, taking a step away from him. I turned my thoughts back to the days where I would stay over at his trailer, reading music magazines until the sun was way below the horizon. I recalled the times I was frustrated, and he’d nod his head to the woods outside school where he’d hand me a joint and we’d unwind, snickering about the most mundane of things. I remembered how after StarCourt, he hugged me like I was glass, because whilst he didn’t know the whole story, he knew I was hurting.

He was my person. I was not going to give up that easily.

“No.” I turned on my heel, my voice raising an octave. “You don’t get to tell me why I did what I did. You don’t know. And if you knew, you’d have even the tiniest amount of sympathy for me.”

He raised a brow. He opened his mouth as if to talk, but I cut him off. “You’ve had plenty of time to talk, Munson. It’s my turn.”

Sucking in a deep breath, I started spewing out every word I’d held back over the past few days. “Do you have any idea how hard it was to push you away? Do you have any idea how much that killed me? You are my person, Eddie Munson. You are the closest thing I have to a brother in this world and it fucking devastated me to see you in the halls, but not even smile at each other anymore.”

My vision grew blurry. I didn’t care, letting the tears spill down my cheeks. “But you know what hurts more? The thought of you dying. All of this backwards shit that’s happened over the past few years has killed people, Eddie. I have watched people die in front of my eyes and all I could ever think about was how I would feel if that was you.” I jabbed my finger at him aggressively, uncaring about the spit flying from my mouth. “People who get involved in this get hurt. They get hurt, or they die. I couldn’t let that happen to you. So I pushed you away. But now you’re here and it was a waste.”

I was borderline hyperventilating, my finger still raised in the air. “I lost months of memories with you and now you’re here and I,” my breath hitched in my throat. “I’m not sure I can protect you.”

I saw Eddie unravel before my eyes. His indifferent demeanour changed as he opened up his arms, gesturing for me to come forward. I didn’t waste a minute, lurching into his arms and feeling them wrap around me. I sobbed into his jacket, relishing the scent of weed and leather enveloping my senses. His hands brushed up and down my back, his voice soothing me.

By the time my tears slowed down, the vehicle pulled to a stop. Everyone awkwardly lingered as I pulled myself from Eddie’s embrace, sniffling. He placed a delicate hand on my neck, smiling at me softly. “I’ve missed you too, you stubborn asshole.”

I was elated. Such pure happiness consumed me that I felt no fear when walking into the Upside Down again. I felt little anxiety as Dustin, Eddie and I were boarding up the trailer, preparing ourselves for what was to come. I only felt the tiniest drop of fear as Eddie began to play Master of Puppets on his guitar, the fear trickling in as I saw the swarms of bats gunning towards us against the red sky.

The bats were closing in quickly. Dustin begged Eddie to finish sooner, I tightened my grasp on the spear in my hand. Eddie finished the solo in the nick of time, the three of us rushing down the ladder and into the trailer. The door slammed shut with a resolute thud. I felt myself relax against the metal, grinning wildly to myself as I witnessed Eddie and Dustin jump up and down for joy.

I wanted to share in their excitement, I really did. But my experiences told me that something worse was coming. The pit in my stomach began to grow as the thudding of the bats became louder against the metal.

A bang. My gaze snapped upwards to see bats threatening to come through the vent. Instinctively I moved towards it, swinging my spear up and killing the ones threatening to enter. Dustin joined me, throwing his spear as randomly as I was, praying that the swarm would stop. My arms were beginning to ache with the repetitive motion and yet the bats kept on coming.

“Move,” Eddie commanded, holding the nail-filled shield and jamming it into the vent, effectively blocking the hole.

“Good call,” I complimented, bent over and hand squeezing my side.

Eddie nodded, seemingly content with himself. The battering had seemed to quieten and I took a moment to rejoice.

Dustin froze. “There’s not anymore vents, are there?”

I exchanged a look with Eddie. I knew this trailer inside out after all the years spent in it, and by pure instinct my feet guided me towards the back room, grinding to a halt as I saw the bat claws ripping open the vent. A huge gust of bats swooped into the room. I pushed Eddie and Dustin back behind me, bringing the door shut with a thud.

We were trapped in the living room, bats in rooms on both sides. The only place left to go now was back up the rope. Eddie encouraged Dustin up the rope, sending him a reassuring smile.

“I’m right behind you, buddy.” Once Dustin was safely on the other side, he gestured for me to climb the rope. I held it in my hands, pausing for a moment as I looked at Eddie. He was on edge, a sorrowful look in his eyes. Even after all these months of being apart, I knew right then what he was planning. My heart dropped. I had already left him alone once, I wasn't going to do it again.

I let go of the rope.

“What are you doing?” He exclaimed, passing the rope back to me. “Climb!”

“What, and let you have all the fun?” His face dropped.

He paused for a moment. “Are you sure?”

“You’re my ride or die, Eddie, of course I’m sure.”

“And you say I’m the stubborn asshole.” He grabbed his spear, deaf to Dustin’s protests. In one fell swoop he effectively severed the tie between our worlds.

I ignored Dustin’s pleas, snatching up my own spear and sucking in a breath. My heart was racing in my chest and my mind screamed at me to turn back, to find some way back through the gate; my heart told me to follow him. I wasted too much time pushing him away to protect, now I was going to do the very thing I swore to do when I ended our friendship months ago,

Eddie swung the door open, rushing towards the bike in the yard. I was hot on his tail, trying not to hyper focus on the number of bats lurking around us, jumping on the back spokes of the bike. He began pedalling furiously, body swinging side to side with the energy. I grasped tightly onto his shoulders, my spear digging into his shoulder. I turned around, sensing the bats gaining on us.

“Pedal faster!”

“What do you think I’m doing?!”

In one moment I was standing upright, the next I was thrown to the ground. The road bit into my cheeks as I came to a stop. Panic coursed through me as I struggled to see Eddie amongst the black mist of bats.

“Eddie!” I clambered to my feet clumsily, ignoring the faint burn of my knees and hands. I grabbed my spear from where it had fallen, hitting the few bats that were in my way. I was closer to the swarm now. My eyes nearly fell out of my head as I saw Eddie at the eye of it all, swinging ferociously with his spear and screaming a battle cry.

My worst fear was going to become a reality.

Adrenaline pounded through my veins. With a shriek of my own, I ploughed into the sea of bats, striking at them in a deadly dance. Bodies started to fall around me as I got closer to Eddie, moving at such speed it felt unnatural.

A bat bit into his shoulder.

I moved faster now, the sight of his blood sending me into a blind fury. I was within reach of him when I saw a bat swerve down, aiming straight for his neck. I didn’t think, I acted on instinct. I shoved Eddie out of the way, feeling the bat's teeth tear into my jugular. An animalistic scream left me as I pulled it away, blood spurting profusely. With all the energy I could muster, I slammed it into the floor, stomping on its head.

The world started to spin. Absent-mindedly my hand drifted to my neck, and when I looked back down at it, it was slick with red. I wanted to laugh, unable to believe it had taken this long for this world to break me.

I heard Eddie scream my name, just as all the bats started falling limp. They died around me as I fell, crashing harshly into the ground. Eddie was by my side instantly, wide eyes staring into me. His hand fell on my neck - I hissed at the contact, but he wouldn’t let go. He pressed down harder, forcing a cry of agony out of me.

“It’s going to be okay.” He whispered. We both knew he was saying it for his own sake. I knew my fate the moment I let go of that rope.

“You can’t die on me yet.” Eddie warned, his gaze glassy. “We have a lot of catching up to do, you and I. I need to tell you all about the new campaign, about the little squirts, and we need to go graffiti the school. You are always so good at that.”

I smiled weakly, coughing lightly. Blood wet my lips. I felt Eddie’s hand press down harder. “Why isn’t this working!” He cursed, ripping the bandanna off his head and pressing that to the wound. I knew it was fruitless; I didn’t have the energy to argue. I just relished in being close to him, to the new memories we made in the last few days.

I lifted my hand, cupping his cheek. He froze, lip quivering. “You deserve the world and more. Don’t let,” I coughed, ignorant to the spew of blood that projected up. “Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.”

“You’re going to be fine. You’re going to -” He started to ramble, cutting himself off as he started to notice my ghostly complexion. “You’re my best friend. I love you.”

I missed hearing those words after so long. “I love you too.”

I heard footsteps approaching, Dustin’s cries of anguish. I tried to hold on a little longer to say goodbye; death had other plans. As I felt death’s scythe swoop over me, I managed to utter my final words to this planet.

"Thank you for being my friend."

stranger things masterlist

#eddie munson x you #eddie x me #eddie x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson angst #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson x gn!reader #stranger things x reader #stranger things fanfiction #stranger things s4 #stranger things 4 #stranger things season 4 #stranger things #stranger things x gn reader #stranger things x y/n

84 notes · View notes

terry-perry · 2 years

Text

Good Enough

Pairing: Past Eddie Munson x Reader

A/N: I don't know what this is, tbh. Came to my head in snippets, and this was my attempt at piecing it all together lol

Hope you like!

It was one of those "your fate across the crowded room" moments. In a way, it was. Robin had invited you and Eddie to the party. She knew you wouldn't be able to work this out on your own. So, this was like giving fate a bit of a nudge.

"She sees him," Robin pointed out to Steve when she saw that you spotted Eddie several feet away from you.

When he noticed that Eddie's back was still turned, Steve decided to grab his attention by using the pizza bagel he had. He used it by chucking it at the back of Eddie's head. It got his attention right away as he was ready to face his attacker. But he was soon caught off guard when he locked eyes with you.

"Looks like our job is done," Steve said as he draped an arm over Robin. "They're on their own now."

----

You threw daggers at Robin who was currently feigning a conversation with Steve. You knew this was all their doing.

You turned your attention back at Eddie, whose eyes were still on you. You then looked at the drink you still had on you. You didn't know if you wanted to gulp it all down or go splash it in your friends' nosy faces. You decided to go with the former and downed it all, wincing as its burning taste went down your throat.

Your eyes stayed glued on Eddie as you made your way to him while wondering if it was really the alcohol making your legs feel like Jell-O. Before you knew it, you were face to face with him. You were mere inches away as you shared a small smile. He was the first to speak.

"Out of all the parties, in all the towns, in all the world, you crash mine,"

You couldn't help but melt. "You saw Casablanca,"

"You left the tape at my place. You were right. It was good."

"Told you so," you were teasing before turning semi-serious. "So, um, how have you been?"

You knew breaking the proverbial ice was needed until you could get to what you really wanted to talk to him about.

"Is that what you really wanted to ask me?" He asked as if he was reading your mind.

It was his ability to read you so easily that made what you want to tell him all the somewhat easier.

"I just wanted to say..." you began with a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry. I acted like...like a real bitch. I let what others thought influence my decisions because I thought that was what was best. I look at Nancy and Chrissy, how they chose things -- people -- over their popularity like it was no problem. But the thing is, they were always people with minds of their own. Me? I always had to follow someone, go along with what everyone else was doing."

You kept holding onto the eye contact, needing him to know how sincere you were. "When it came to you, the only thing I should've been listening to was my heart."

"And what's your heart telling you to do now?"

"Well, even though I don't deserve one, I'd really love a second chance."

He took his hand, placing it on your cheek as he gave you a warm smile. The tears you held back finally escaped. Some of them landed on his hand as he continued to caress your face.

"There's nothing I want more than to tell you yes,"

"But you're not gonna?" You inquired, worried. Your smile soon vanished with more tears starting to form.

"What you just said about being a follower, I get that," he gave out a sigh of his own as he thought about his own experiences that brought him to where he was currently. "This past year, I've done nothing but run from my mistakes. I couldn't make a decision for myself unless someone else was around to make it for me. I think if I want to learn how to be my own person, I have to do just that. Be on my own."

God, that just made you want him even more. But you knew better.

"Can't say I'm not disappointed," you admitted at least.

"I still care about you," he said. "And I'd really like for us to be friends."

Your smile came back. It wasn't exactly what you were hoping for, but you were still very much wanted it seemed.

"I'd like that too," your smile then turned a little cheeky. "You know friends make out every now and then right?"

#eddie munson x reader #ex!reader #x reader #stranger things fanfic #imagine #oneshot #stranger things #eddie munson

75 notes · View notes

wrenhyperfixates · 3 years

Text

All I Need is You

Pairing: Loki x reader Summary: You do so much for everyone else and so little for yourself that when you almost collapse, Loki finally gets you to agree to let him take care of you. Warnings: the reader skips some meals; a lot of fluff A/N: Its really just Loki taking care of you. But please remember to take care of yourselves too everyone!! Hope you enjoy :)

Permanent Tag List: @lucywrites02 @frostedficrecs @lunarmoon8 @twhiddlestonsstuff @lokistan @lowkeyorlokificrecs @gaitwae @whatafuckingdumbass @castiels-majestic-wings @kozkaboi @cozy-the-overlord @birdgirl90 @myraiswack @mythicalgarlicknot @what-a-flammable-heart @marvelouslovely @laurenandloki @fallinallinmendes @sophlubbwriting @mooncat163 @lokislittlesigyn @wolfish-trickster

Disclaimer: Gif not mine

Loki was watching you even more carefully than normal these days. Yes, you’d caught his eye even on your first day in the Tower back when you were just a new recruit, a SHIELD agent with some kind of sixth sense that let you anticipate things, recently transferred to the Avengers Tower. Even now no one was entirely sure if it was a power or just an uncanny knack you had that made you extremely good at your job. Regardless, the trickster god could see how the ability had shaped you.

You’d only been in the Tower a week when you’d started running errands all over the city, offering things to people before they could even think they needed it themselves, then going to pick it up for them. Loki had declined the offer after hearing all the places you were already going. He’d hoped it was a fluke, that you wouldn’t make it a habit of taking care of everyone. Not that it was inherently bad, he just knew how tiring it could be to please everyone, worried that you would burn out. Of course, you had kept doing it, and his worries turned out to be justified.

“Darling, are you going out again?” Loki asked as you passed his seat in the common room on your way to the elevator. He set his book down, frowning. “Did you not just go yesterday? Unless, of course, this time it is for you. Then by all means, please be on your way.”

“No... It’s just Steve and Bucky were talking about some cereals they used to like and we don’t have any in the Tower so...” you trailed off, shuffling your feet.

“And can they not wait for it until the next scheduled trip to the supermarket?”

“Well, yeah, they said they could. But I don’t mind.”

Loki stood and sighed, walking over to you. Gently, so you didn’t have to comply if you didn’t want to, Loki lifted your chin to look at him. You looked tired. Admirable as it was that you wanted to do things for others, you needed a rest day.

“And tell me, darling, when was the last time you did something for yourself?” He waited a moment for an answer, but was met with silence. “What about that drawing you started two months ago? Have you worked on that more?”

“It wasn’t any good, anyway,” you shrugged. “I’ve been busy.”

“It was wonderful,” he reassured you. “What about eating, though? Have you eaten today?”

“I... I had a mint.”

“That does not count.” Now he was outright worried. You did this every once in a while, saying you just got so caught up in other things, you forgot to eat. Whatever the reason, it troubled Loki. “You have had some water at least? You know what, do not answer. I am sure I know already. Just wait here a moment.”

You waited by the lift as Loki padded to the kitchen, searching for a water bottle. The problem went beyond just these shopping trips. Sometimes when Tony or Bruce got stuck on one of their projects, you’d pore over books and blueprints for hours, searching for the answer, losing sleep. Then other times, you took it upon yourself to plan events for the team. It was more than a simple, casual invitation. No, it usually involved at least three days of extensive planning. Everyone enjoyed them and was appreciative, needing a break from their day-to-day lives, but it just took up more of your time and brainpower. Pile that onto your own training and missions, it was enough to wear anyone out.

But what he both loved and hated the most was how you’d always be there to talk. Not just for him, but for everyone. And not merely a laid-back chat, either. No, they were practically therapy sessions. Again, just like all the other things you did, that would be all fine and good, except for the fact you never talked about your own issues. You just did so much for everyone else and practically nothing for yourself, even something so basic as remembering to eat, that it broke Loki’s heart a little more every day.

“Here,” he said, handing you the plastic bottle. “But I am coming with you.”

Smiling brightly, you led the way out into the city streets. You chatted as you went about your task, and Loki was yet to take his eyes off of you. It wasn’t until you started the journey back, however, that he began to grow worried. You hadn’t taken even the smallest sip of the water he’d fetched for you, and on this hot day, it was clearly taking its toll. You stumbled a little, suddenly looking more out of it than Loki could stand. He gently gripped your arm to steady you and led you to a bench. Grabbing the water out of your backpack, Loki uncapped it and held the bottle to your lips.

“Drink,” he ordered, but with kindness in his tone.

One of your hands that was gripping the bench a bit too tightly in an attempt to ground your dizzy mind came up to take the bottle from him. Complying, you downed nearly half the bottle in one gulp. It seemed that was a mistake as your empty stomach gargled, rebelling against the sudden intake. Loki rubbed large circles on your back while you scrunched your eyes closed, breathing deeply as you tried to force yourself to feel better.

“Are you alright, darling?” Loki asked when you felt well enough to take another few small sips. You nodded your head, eyes still closed. “Now do you see why it is important to take care of yourself? Will you please get some rest this afternoon?”

“I’m fine, really. Don’t worry, I-”

“That is madness!” Both Loki and you flinched at his sudden increase in volume. He removed his hand from your back, feeling unworthy to make contact with you after snapping like that. You were his friend, and he was yelling at you for something like this? It made him disappointed in himself. He sighed. “Listen, I am sorry. All I mean is I care about you. I do not like to see you like this. It is not healthy, and I believe you know that.”

You opened your eyes, blinking at him. “You-you care about me?”

Loki felt heat flood to his cheeks as he realized that he had, in fact, said that. “I do. So will you please let me take care of you?”

You bit your lip for a minute. “I will,” you sighed, giving in.

Satisfied, Loki coaxed you into accepting a piggyback ride the rest of the way home. You placed your forehead in the crook of his neck, enjoying his cool skin against yours, which was noticeably overheating. He quickly tossed the grocery bags of cereal onto the counter and brought you to your room, your own little pocket of the world that you trusted Loki enough to share with him if even for a moment. Laying you down on your bed, he told you to rest for a minute, lips placing a ghost of a kiss on your forehead.

The god moved to your bathroom, looking for what he needed. After preparing a bubble bath with nice, cool water, Loki left you to sink into it with only the order to relax. While you did, he hurried to prepare you a light meal, something that wouldn’t upset your stomach. When you padded out of the bathroom in the soft pajamas Loki had left for you and saw the meal on a tray on your bedside table, a smile tugged at your lips.

Loki peeled back the silken sheets he’d put on your bed so you could get under them. With a little bit of difficulty—Loki never had gotten a firm grasp on understanding Midgardian technology—he flipped through the channels on your TV until you found something you wanted to watch while you ate.

“Is there anything else you need?” he asked once you were done eating, before leaving you to your own devices.

You bit your lip as you thought before ultimately shaking your head no. “I’m good thanks.”

“Please, darling, be honest with me,” he pleaded. “Anything you want. Name it, and it is yours.”

“Will you stay with me?” you blurted out. “No, I’m sorry, that’s ridiculous. I’ve taken up enough of your time.”

“Darling,” he tsked. “The only thing on my schedule today is taking care of you.”

You smiled as he slid under the sheets next to you, wrapping his arms around your body and pulling you onto his lap. You twisted your body so you could look at him and tuck a few locks of his raven hair behind his ear. You were living in your own place in time, the two of you finding a safe haven in each other’s arms.

“You know what would make me really happy, Loki?” you began. “If I got to give you a little, thank you. Would that be alright?”

The god hesitated for a moment. “I suppose. Depending on what it is.”

“Can I... Would it be alright if I kissed you?”

“Well, that depends, again.”

“On?”

“On whether or not we can make it a regular occurrence,” Loki replied with a playful grin.

“You know, you are always saying I should do things that make me happy. So yes, yes we absolutely can.”

“In that case,” he said, already leaning in, “what are you waiting for?”

Giggling, you bridged the gap between you. As Loki smiled against your lips, he realized something. No matter how stubborn either of you were when it came to accepting help for yourselves, you’d always have the other to take care of you. And even more importantly, Loki thought, you’d have each other to love.

505 notes · View notes

junova · 3 years

Text

𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐰𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐚𝐤𝐞.

notes: howdy guys, it's been a while. i've been taking a break and finally starting writing again, yay. it's been a rough few months and still treading through it, but i hope you enjoy a piece of my heart with this one.

if it's any consolation, my heart broke while writing this. </3

pairing — boxer!steve rogers x fem!reader

concept — steve has to come with terms of you not wanting him just as much as he wants you.

wc — 6.7k+ [yeah...]

warnings: 18+, themes alluding to sex, emotional cheating, soft!steve, heartbreak, kind of unrequited vibe going on, over all ✨ angst ✨

Even if it was the thousandth time to watch his body move in the ring, you still were memorized by the way he moved. You were in complete admiration of how his hips flowed so fluidly through his punches. Just like always, he was aware of your presence as you stood next to Sam and Wanda, both of them with proud smiles on their faces as he defeated yet another opponent.

Watching as they raised his arm, declaring him as the champion, something he’d been striving so intensely for, the past few months. Even if his body was bruised and littered with the hits Rumlow had been able to mark his body with and not to mention the busted lip, making him taste the blood with nearly every swallow.

It didn’t matter because he had followed through with what he had set his mind out to do. The looks Rumlow was giving him after all the smack talk he had served him was satisfying enough. Even if he didn’t think you did, he saw you standing there alongside his friends, celebrating the win of his life.

He couldn’t but smile proudly at your presence, even if the disapproval you have against his lifestyle was well known between the two of you and everyone else in your friend group.

Steve knew you weren’t a fan of the injuries you brought home in your shared apartment, the nights you actually stayed there. With Jordan’s absence from New York, you’d been staying there more consistently than ever.

He would never admit it out right, but it made his heart full. With you home, he could protect and he worried wherever you weren’t there. Even if he knew you were fully capable of defending yourself if need be, it would always make him feel better when you were close to him.

Just like him, you could confess it even to yourself, but when you were back in the apartment you shared with Steve, you’d always felt safer.

He went straight to the locker room, to clean himself up as best as he could without making his friends and Tony wait too long. He’d usually go straight to them but the group took notice he held himself back when you were around.

The first match you went to and he came up with bruises running along both rib cages, a bloody nose accompanied by a busted lip, he immediately took notice of the way you cowered away from him. Barely even looking at him as you congratulated him. From then on out, he realized how much it bothered you to see him physically injured.

When you’d come, he’d always make sure to clean himself up before. It really worked out on the days he didn’t want to be around many people. Only the stragglers from the crowd would be left, and his friends who supported him nearly every time.

As soon as he made his way over to the group, he was met with Sam’s warm smile pulling him into a warm hug. You found yourself wincing as soon as Steve did. “Easy there big buy, bruises are still fresh.” Sam let up just a tad, before everyone was congratulating him. You stood back with Tony, watching the proud smile grow on his face as he watched his prodigy surpass his monumental goal.

“You should think about coming to more matches. He fights better when you’re here watching him.” You twisted your neck so you could see his coach more clearly who was standing right beside you. “I’m sure he plays just as well when I’m not here. I still watch them everytime, just from home when it’s too much for me to stomach.”

You looked forward away from Tony, Steve coming into your line of vision as Sharon, his ex who had surprisingly shown up to corral by his side, someone you’d hadn’t seen near him in the past few weeks since she’d been out of the country for work.

“His technique and endurance is the same, but his intensity always rises higher when you’re here. I’m not the only one who notices, maybe the only one bold enough to say it to you.” Tony spoke as watched the man he took in when Steve was just sixteen.

Truly, it made his heart swell with pride to see him reach the level of success he had been dreaming for him since the pair had met. Knowing Steve for the past five years, also made him hyper aware of the girl he never seemed to shut up about, not that you’d ever find out.

No matter how much Tony was dying to let the words slip off his tongue.

“I’m just happy to be here for him.” Keeping your words short as you watched Sharon move closer to him, her hand resting on his chest and he didn’t even move away from it. You tried to ignore the ugly shade of green rising in your chest, but with him it always seemed to show.

Not that you’d had a right to, you weren’t single or emotionally available by any means, but the thought of him being with someone who had hurt him so much made you more protective of him than you had a right to be.

“C’mon little dove, have you thought about why you’d rather stay in the dinged up apartment with Steve than be with your boyfriend of three years across the country?” He pressed harder, making sure you were careful of your response. “My friends are here and so is my family. I can’t just leave everyone I love behind.” Your gaze never left Steve’s as he finally was out of Sharon’s grip.

“Steve’s here, too. You sure it has nothing to do with him?” Part of you couldn’t stand there with Tony and lie to him because you weren’t sure what was the nature of your relationship with the boxer.

Thankfully, you were saved from responding by the devil himself as made his way over to the two of you. Much to your dismay, he had to get in a few more words before Steve was in earshot. “Just think about why Steve lives with you when he’s had more than enough to move out for a while now.”

Before you could even process the words leaving his mouth, your favorite man in the ring immediately has you wrapped up in his arms. Holding you so close and so tightly, not even caring if it put more pressure on his lungs than he wished.

“Congrats on the win, Champion. I’m so proud of you.” The arms you had around him were placed gently, too afraid to put any weight on the new bruises. Not to mention the old ones which were still healing.

Once he pulled away from you, just enough so you could look at him. He hummed at Tony and with one nod of his head he knew when the young boxer wanted to be left alone. More times than not, it is usually with you.

“I thought you weren’t coming tonight. Isn’t Jordan in town?” Not even when it was the biggest moment of his career thus far did he care to indulge in his victories. Always it seemed to be looking after you.

“Stevie, this is your night. We don’t have to talk about me — we’re always talking about me.” For a moment he almost bought your act until he looked into those dazzling eyes of yours, ones he never seemed to grow tired of in the past few years.

“I’m not happy unless you’re happy. So, if you need a night where we just watch romcoms and chow on cookie dough ice cream, you know I’m all yours.” Unknowing to the two of you, everyone of your friends was watching the encounter and still couldn’t believe you still were with your current boyfriend.

Or that Steve was just waiting for you patiently. Something that didn’t come easy for him around women. Before you, he didn’t really do relationships with women that didn’t end with him in their bed at some point. Somehow, much to everyone’s dismay, he managed to keep his interactions platonic with you.

At least in their eyes.

“No, Stevie. I’m fine. He just didn’t follow through this time. It’s not the end of the world, I’ll be fine. Tonight, I just wanna be by your side and celebrate you.” Although, he didn’t really believe you Steve decided he would let it go.

“Regardless of it, thank you for coming tonight. Means the world to me.” It really did. Even more so, when he felt like he was one of the reasons you were still in Brooklyn and not in California living with your boyfriend instead.

“Oh, hush bubba. You’re getting so soft on me and you haven’t even had a proper drink in you yet. Let’s just celebrate with our friends, yeah?” You kissed his cheek sweetly, before you were off to Bucky and Nat’s place to get properly fed and surely get Steve drunk off his ass.

It really was the elephant in the room you were choosing to ignore. The fluttering feeling of adventurous butterflies traveling to spaces you didn’t know existed. Everytime he pulled you close to his side or kissed your temple.

When Bucky would do something monumentally stupid, he would whisper a line in your ear humorous enough to hear you laugh. Even right now, when you knew he was exhausted, muscles sore and aching — Steve was still tending to whatever you needed.

In this moment, your body nestled between his legs as he draped his arm across your chest, letting him hold you close was exactly what you needed. Even if you tried to remove yourself several times because of the new injuries, he would never let you.

“What’s next, Rogers?” Steve watched as he craned his neck towards Sharon. You’d almost forgotten she was here, she’d been so quiet most of the night.

“A whole lot of rest and then in a few weeks, right back into training.” He spoke with pride because winning the title went hand and hand with defending it. “You should come to the club. Danielle’s been itching to see you, again.”

Steve grimaced, not just as Sharon’s words, but with how stiff your body became. The way you rubbed back and forth with the tip of your fingers against his forearm came to a halt.

You weren’t really sure what to do because now you felt horrible for even feeling like you had a right to be upset in the first place. Because you didn’t. You weren’t single and Steve was. In this space in time, he did nothing wrong.

When you followed Nat back into the kitchen to grab a bottle of wine, away from him, it felt like he had made a mistake.

Just watching as you followed Nat up the pathway, in your pretty green dress, as you messed with the necklace adoring your neck. Something he learned you did when you were anxious.

“Why would you bring that up now? In front of her?” He was slightly pissed off she had driven you away and out of his arms. Steve would have you within his grip constantly if you would let him. Not that you did, but it was still a certain something he found himself wishing for. More than not though, someone else always seemed to hold your attention whenever he wasn’t in the ring.

Jordan. Tony. Sam. Natasha. Bucky. Wanda.

Tonight had seemed it might go in a different direction, until Sharon steered your mind elsewhere. One where you were a girl who missed her boyfriend. Or at least that’s what he thought.

Unknowingly to Steve, Jordan was the last thing on your mind, which allowed the guilt to settle in. Maybe, just this one time it was rightfully placed. The thoughts you were having scared you senseless — making you want to do something you knew you shouldn’t.

You just sat there on the padded bar tool as Nat grabbed a bottle of white with a bottle of red. Like time and time again, Nat read your mind just as she often did. “So, why couldn’t he come this time?” She drilled into you, her iridescent daggers as piercing as ever.

“He said he forgot his mother asked him to help her move out of the house. He said he’d make it up to me some other time.” Just like always.

But you held your tongue before voicing it to anyone other than yourself. It’d been months since you’d seen him in the flesh, and it was the first time he spoke to you in days when he informed you he’d been unable to spend any of his time off with you.

“He’s just never here and he keeps asking for me to move to Los Angeles, but my whole life is here. Before, he never seemed to really pressure me. He was always patient with me to travel at my own pace but I think he ultimately thought I would eventually go there with him.” You breathed out, scared of the truth dripping right out of you.

“I just-, you know what? Nevermind. It’s isn’t important.” She was never one to bite her tongue, but she found herself trying to when your feelings were involved.

“Tell me. What is it?” Your curious, bambi eyes peering into your soul, dying to pull the confession right out of her.

“Do you even miss him when you’re apart for so long? I’m not judging but it just seems like you’re okay. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing, but why don’t you ever go to him or Jordan to you?” Natasha spoke softly, afraid she might be poking the bear just a bit.

“Of course I miss him. I would see him if I could. I’m just a little too busy right now with work and my family.” You attacked back, feeling the need to defend yourself.

“Are you really going to make me say it?” With both bottles of wine on the counter, she went to grab three more wine glasses — for Sharon, herself, and you.

“Say what? What the hell are you talking about?” You pushed her as she put out the bottles of wine as she managed to link the three vines of the glasses in her left fingertips. “Forget it. I shouldn’t have said anything.” She was regretting it now, because maybe you weren’t quite ready to hear the words everyone else knew to be true. Anyone who was around the two of you could see it.

Perhaps, Nat never spoke a word of it because at the very least, she thought you wouldn’t be as naive to see his feelings. The ones he seemed to offer you on a silver platter, whether you wanted to reject or accept the offering, giving it to you wholeheartedly.

Following her out the patio door where the two of you stopped, not moving a step further. She didn’t really say anything either. Letting you bask in the glow before the fall.

He was laughing so hard, his hand clutching his chest as him. Golden hair shining bright by the fire pit, almost as

lively as his smile. Even if it looked like his spirit could have been beaten out of him tonight, he’d never show it.

When he had trouble keeping his eyes open, he’d force himself to stay alert because moments he could spend with ones he loved seemed too precious to pass up. Especially over the past few months — he didn’t even have to think twice about it.

Through the schedule Tony had him on, his life was eating, breathing, living boxing. Training every day in the gym, whether it be furthering his techniques in the gym to Tony making him regret any mistake he made in the ring.

Even some days he was just weight training when Tony told him he could rest. He couldn’t though. Not when he could taste the sweetness of his dreams on the tip of his tongues.

Every day, dawn till dusk, training consumed every moment of his time. Steve thought his body was restless before, but now? Nothing came even close to this.

Leading Steve to be blissfully unaware of what was actually going in that fantastically bold head of yours.

“Just spill it, Romanov.” You pressured her, but your eyes were too weak to redirect your directions elsewhere. Only Steve holding your attention at one.

“Remember when Steve left for Spain for three months with Tony?” Your body stilled, having a feeling you knew where this was going. Regretting you told her what had happened with Steve in the first after promising him it would just stay between the two of you.

“It was the year Jordan and I had split for two months.” The memory of what happened always clouding your better judgement. The way his eyes shined still haunted you. “Steve had already been there a month when it happened and the second I told him he insisted on flying me out.”

Looking at him fondly, across the greenery before speaking so softly as if he was right next to you, “I could never say no to him. I still can’t.” Nat tried to ignore it but she could see through the fog of your first love fading even if you were trying your hardest to avoid the inevitable heartache.

The care you held for him was oozing out of you, bursting and breaking at the seams. When you kept thinking of him more than a roommate, more than a friend.

“Dove, you can’t just keep pretending your feelings don’t exist. The more you try to bury the root deep the more it will grow.” You knew she was right, but you really didn’t want to hurt anyone.

You supposed you were already causing pain unintentionally. “His biggest insecurity is him. Jordan thinks I’m still here because of him.” You confessed, the ongoing fight no secret to anyone, really.

“Aren’t you?” Maybe if you had been a better liar, you could’ve convinced her but everyone could read you like the back of your own hand.

You hated the spotlight she was putting on you, but even more so because she was right. Moving forward with Jordan meant leaving someone else behind, something you couldn’t seem to prepare yourself to do.

“I love Jordan. He’s my first love and I thought he would be the greatest one, too.” You really want to stop the love and admiration flowing out of you, but you couldn’t choose who you love and maybe it was time for you to stop fighting it.

“Then, I met Steve. He responded to the ad I put out for the spare room in my apartment and we met for coffee.” If you had listened to your mother, her wishes of you not to be in the company of a man who was a complete stranger, you’d never meet the most important person in your life.

“He looked more like a boy back then. Clean shaven. No beard. Steve was still muscular, but not nearly as toned as he is now. But his eyes? They pulled me right in. Still do, every damn time.” You should have held some sort of shame, but you didn’t.

“You should do something about it, Dove. He isn’t going to be single forever.” Nat questioned as you followed her lead, back to the roaring fire.

“Nat, I love Jordan. I could never do that to him.” You really couldn’t, but you also couldn’t find it in you to move with him either. “I know you love him, but you aren’t in love anymore.” Growing closer and closer, back to the group, you saw him clearly.

“What do you mean?” Trying to ignore the pain in your chest as Natasha spoke. “I think you’re scared of ending it with Jordan. Dove. I’ve known you for a long time now and I’ve never seen you look at anyone the way you do with Steve.”

The words spilling out of her lips left you a little broken — the truth spearing you through. She wasn’t wrong, not one bit. Nat never nearly was, especially when your feelings were involved. Steve had become such an enigma to you in the past year.

The line of platonic friendship and overflowing emotional intimacy was becoming too entangled for you to even comprehend.

“Just think about it. I just want you to be happy.” The rest of the night, it’s all you could think about. A few days passed and it was still in the forefront of your mind.

When Steve was walking home with you this week, you couldn’t stop wondering all the hypotheticals swarming inside your dreams.

He could tell, too.

You’d never been so quiet, not ever. He’d like to hear you, especially when you were drunk. Like you seemed to be now, at least to him but tequila that lit a fire in your chest a few hours ago was beginning to wear off. Just when the feelings you kept trying to avoid would seep there way back in like your furry, fat cat Thor when he wormed his body through the gate into the apartment.

“What’s wrong? You’ve seemed off this week.” You felt his hand kiss yours, but he didn’t bother to find it’s home. He’d been keeping his distance or at least been trying to. You'd been so vulnerable lately and the last thing he wanted to do was exploit that.

Ever since Sharon had made a comment about Danielle, and you escaped with Nat, something changed. You more guarded around him, more than you'd ever been since you met.

Steve knew there was a reason for it, but he didn't want to push you — not when it looked like you would combust into a breakdown at any given moment.

“I’ve just been thinking about where my life is going and where I want it to go.” You confessed, letting your words linger. “Jordan wants me to move with him to California and I’m running out of reasons to say no.” In perfect harmony, your eyes met his at the same time.

They weren’t joyful what his bright blues usually possess, but this time they were indifferent. Not even you could read them.

“Do you want to move there with him?” Steve asked you, his heart on the verge of dropping into his stomach. “If it will make you happy, you should.” Shoving his hands in his pockets, you watched him drift away from you.

“I don’t know. It might.” Both of you coming to a halt, walking up to the apartment the two of you shared.

“He’s insecure about you. It’s why he’s pressuring me.” The two of your bodies so close but so far away as you stood in the doorway. With a confusing gaze and pouty lips, practically guiding you into temptation.

“He used to always tell me you were in love with me. He was fully convinced, still is. I never thought so. You were just my best friend, that was it. I just never really thought about it unless Jordan brought it up.” You would have loved to blame your sudden outburst on the alcohol, but it was something you'd been dying to do.

Before you never had the guts, but you a felt a pull towards Steve lately, like maybe there was something more trying to burst under the seams.

“I thought Tony was bullshitting me, fucking with me, but I didn’t ever give it a thought. Then, Nat brought up Spain.” Nights you told yourself were a mistake, but deep down it was the probably the safest you felt in a long time.

“What are you talking about? What did Tony say?” Fetching for the key, he slid it in before opening the door for you and following you inside. “Steve, why do you still live here?” Blushing cheeks and a string of incoherent words was all you could make out from him.

As he headed for the small couch, trying to make up an excuse good enough. One which you’d actually believe, he hoped.

“You make four times as much as me, if not more. For some reason, you’ve decided to stay in this shithole apartment — it doesn’t make sense.” He wished you would make sense of it, that way he didn’t have to say a word.

“Do you want me to move out?” He questioned, watching your movements. If you wanted him to move out, he wouldn’t hesitate to do so.

It was the last thing you wanted, but the line between your friendship with him was always blurred. Only now, when it was vaguely pointed out by the two people close to the both of you — it became more apparent than ever.

“No, I just, I guess I’m asking why. You know you’re more than welcome to stay here as long as you’d like, but this place is a dump, Steve. Why on earth would you wanna stay here?” When he looked up, where you stood above him having a hard time biting his tongue.

Because you’re here.

It��s what he wanted to say, but he didn’t have the right and he would just be an asshole if he put you in a compromising position. He already felt guilty enough with his feelings in the first place, he didn't need to pile on.

“I guess it’s just easier to stay. It’s so close to the ring and I’m maybe a tad too comfortable.” You sat next to him on the couch. Finding yourself trapped in the green of his eyes. “Don’t you want something better?” Maybe it was him or maybe it was you. Neither of you could tell.

The two of you inched closer until Steve was caressing your thigh, just with the tip of his thumb. “I’m more than happy with where I’m at.”

“Well, I’m asking because I need to go to California. Just for a bit. I need to see Jordan, it’s been awhile since I’ve seen him.” He didn’t stop touching, not even with the mention of his name.

Even if it pierced him every time you talked about him. Or when Jordan came to town, he felt like he didn’t exist to you.

He didn’t blame you, not at all. Jordan was your highschool sweetheart, and you wanted so badly for it to work but something was holding you back. Something you were trying to let go of.

“He loves me so much and wants to start building this whole new life, but how am I supposed to tell him?” Steve said nothing, letting you sink into the ground.

“He’s been nothing, but kind and loving. Always there, always supportive. The best partner I could have asked for.” Steve laced your hand in his like it was the most natural thing in the world, making butterflies erupt at full speed.

You couldn’t really pinpoint a moment when he started, but all you knew is how safe his warm, calloused hands made you feel. Since the moment you met, never failing to comfort you when needed.

“Then what’s the problem, Dove?” Steve questioned you, untangling his body from yours.

If he was going to help you, he needed to think and being so close to you wouldn’t get himself where you needed. Above all, you didn’t make any easier when a small whine left your throat — tugging at his heart strings.

“We never talk about what happened in Barcelona.” You watched his body tighten, muscles in his arm constricting.

It made him feel just as uneasy as it did to you. At least you could find comfort in that.

“Dove, there’s a reason for it. You and I both know it.” Steve was right. His self righteous sense of nature always kicked in when you wanted it the least.

“You don’t think about it? Because I do.” Pushing weight on his heart, you were very aware you held. You weren’t too naive to know just how much he cared for you, but coward enough to try and make him admit it first.

“You were broken up, things are different now. We’re home where you have a boyfriend and I have boxing.”

“Yes, where I have a boyfriend who wants me to abandon everything I hold close to me to join him without even bothering to ask me what I want.” You puffed out, exhaustion coming in overflow. “The past year, he hasn’t once asked me what I want.”

The boy with golden locks found himself wanting nothing more than to hold you in his arms, nurse you back to health with all the love he could offer.

But even he knew he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t keep on spreading himself thin over a woman who was so conflicted, so distraught she was collapsing within herself. If he wasn’t too careful, he might fall right beside you.

“Before we got back together, he asked me.” You confessed, feeling better as soon as the secret flew from your mouth. “He asked you what?” Steve pressed on, a bit terrified of it truly, but even he had to know.

“He asked if anything happened between us the months I was there and I lied. Ever since we met, he’s been insecure. He thinks I’m going to leave you for him and it wasn’t the first time he asked either.” You wish you hadn’t dealt with the two of them so poorly, but with the expression on Steve’s face you knew you had.

“He knows I lied and it hurts even more he stayed with me anyways.” Steve didn’t move, his fear keeping him still.

“I don’t know how to be his after you, but I don’t know how to let go of my high school sweetheart either.” You felt trapped, in between an impossible decision. An old love, who loves you past your mistakes, past the hurt and a soulful heart admiring you from where you’re at and nothing less.

“Those nights don’t have to mean anything if you don’t want them to.” He spoke softly, his beautiful orbs catching yours in the moonlight peeking through the window.

“They mean too much to me, that’s the problem.” If he didn’t move as you inched closer to his body, planting yourself in front of him, you could tell he was straining himself.

“Do you remember the first time?” He looked confused, wondering if you truly were bold enough to speak of something you shouldn’t touch with a ten foot pole. Your hand found his chest, feeling the pulse of his rapid heart beat. “I was so shy and timid the first time with you, but you guided me so well.” Too fond of the memory of him worshipping every part of your body.

The very thing he wanted to do since the moment he met you, but Steve wanted more than that. Now more than ever.

“You don’t have to remind me, Dove. I remember.” He swallowed deeply, trying to erase the permanent memory of your body writhing beneath him, moaning out his name, begging him for more.

He still found himself thinking about it. Those two months with you had just amplified what he felt even more because now he knew what it was like for you to wake up in his arms, bare skin against his own.

The way you curled into his chest, your arms wrapped around his waist for optimal comfort.

Or when he’d wake up before you, which was most days, he’d find you murmuring his name in your sleep while soft fingertips caressed your skin lulling you into a more peaceful slumber.

“I never forget, Dove. That’s the problem.” With one finger, he pushed back the hair falling in your face tucking it behind your ear. “I tried to move past it, I went on a couple dates with this woman, Danielle.” You already felt your heart clench at the thought of him with someone else.

“She’s kind, smart, and beautiful and she seems to like me. Sharon keeps bugging me to take her out again since she set the two of us up.” Steve was trying to talk calmly, but he couldn’t ground himself. Especially when you only seemed to pull back further from him.

It was weird that Sharon set the pair up, considering she dated Steve not too long ago but it seemed she could put her feelings inside if it was for your despair.

In her daunting eyes, you were the reason her and the promising boxer broke up in the first place. As cliche as it was, she offered Steve an ultimatum after six months of dating — her or you.

Steve picked you.

It wasn’t like he loved her at that point. He did care for her, but you just meant too much to him. When kind, iridescent eyes met his own for the first time Steve never was able to stop thinking about them. Or you for that matter.

Carefully calculated as Steve could be, he managed to trap you between the closed door of his bedroom and his toned body.

“But I want to hear you say something before I do.” His gaze never faltered for a moment as he played with the hem of the short slip dress adoring your taut figure.

Half of your mind was begging you to retreat into your room and forget the last time you’d been pressed up against him like this. The other half wanted to see what he would do once he knew you were in the palm of his hand once again.

You had a feeling he already did.

His beard was grown out and his silky, golden hair that almost reached his shoulders make him look even more deliciously sinful.

“What’s that?” You tried not to gulp loudly, but if you even made the slightest movement, he would notice. “Tell me you’re in love with him.” His soft thumb caressing your side, not sure if he was trying to soothe himself or you.

“Just tell me five years down the line, you see him right there with you. Just say it, so I can move on.” He couldn’t even look at you, he couldn’t take the inevitable. “Tell me we’re just friends and Jordan’s your future.” You met his eyes, the prettiest blues you’ll ever see.

Commanding your attention without even trying — every damn time. You weren’t sure what you wanted, but you knew seeing him hurt was chipping a piece of you away. Watching his arched eyebrows furrowed in distress, fine lines being made in the middle for proof.

Soft fingertips met his skin, smoothing out his furrowed brows, closing his eyes trying to remember what you smelled like. Just like Sharon reached her breaking point, he had too. Steve couldn’t watch you any longer without being the one you wanted without a doubt.

“Stevie.” You softly whisper, before pulling him into your arms.

Even if he was double your size, he let you hold him as best as you could. Comfort him even if you were the reason he’s breaking.

The strong, persistent boxer had been transported back to the sick and thin kid he once was before all the guns and glory came. Steve was right back to where he got rejected by anyone and everyone. A time and many places where no one gave a damn about Steve Rogers, not anyone he wished for.

You watched him untangle himself from you, but you weren’t sure just how much time had passed. A few minutes? Thirty? An hour?

Only time could tell and she wasn’t really on your side at the moment.

“I’ve only found love once. Back in high school, there was this girl, Hazel. She was kind, sweet, eyes that shined like fresh honey. The first person to ever show any interest in me and I was in love with the fact that someone actually wanted me.” Steve felt his heart clench at the memory he wished to forget.

“I truly believed I loved her with every fiber in me and I thought she cared about me too, until I realized she was just using me to get to Bucky.” You watched the distress wash over him again and you wanted nothing more than to make him feel appreciated and loved. Not rejected and forgotten.

“It broke my heart for months because I truly believed I was in love with this girl who I hardly knew.” He sighed deeply, like he somehow already was aware of the soft whisper of goodbye.

“It always kind of stayed with me, not ever feeling like I was good enough for anyone until Tony found me. Graduated high school and I started training dawn till dusk until I couldn’t anymore just to start all over and do it the next day.” He was looking everywhere but you. Even if there was not a thing in this damn hallway, but two pressured hearts.

“Not too long after, I met you and I remember thinking this is the most extraordinary woman I’ve ever met in my life.” Now, feeling like an absolute dick because you truly didn't deserve for this wonderful man to be in your life.

“You were so kind to me and you had no reason to be, but I learned it’s just who you are. This amazingly bright full beam, shining their light on everyone else — not paying attention to how much they give even if it’s everything they have.” Your skin felt hot beyond comparison, the passion in the words he spoke deeper than the memory of his skin against your own.

“I always tried to ignore it, how stupidly kind and thoughtful you are. How much you take care of me when you don’t have to. You cleaned my wounds for months without even asking me what I was doing.”

“I already knew you had a boyfriend, one you love very much, but I couldn’t stop myself from being around you. Now, I have to leave. I need to move on for me because I know how this ends for me — how it always has.” He sighed before walking away, leaving you hanging in every conceivable way. You didn’t notice the suitcase by the door before. Until he was walking out of the apartment with his possessions in hand — out of sight and out of mind.

“Wait!” He was already making it to his car, the old beat up pickup truck he couldn’t seem to get rid of when you reached him. “I just need time, Steve.” You’d been sprinting after him, until you caught up to him, making his attention fully focused on you.

“Jordan’s the only boyfriend I’ve ever had — I don’t know how to let him go.” You were crying because maybe, deep down you were hoping you could have your cake and eat it too.

“And you’re the only person I’ve ever been in love with, Dove. I can’t keep sticking around hoping you’ll wake up one day and feel the same.” He emptied his belongings in his truck before returning his attention towards you.

“Steve, don’t do this. Please. Don’t leave me.” You’d become so dependent on him, more than you realized. “You’re the only person who truly loves me and not for who they want me to be.” Trying to plead with him, but it felt like you were only pushing him even further away.

“Then tell me I’m the only one you want.” But all he was left with silence because you couldn’t and he already knew what you didn’t. He knew you hated change more than anything, that you’d rather stay in what was comfortable even if you were presented with a different option.

Someone you wanted more.

With tears in your eyes, you looked up at him like he was crushing you and there was nothing to stop the numbing feeling. He sympathized, maybe more than he liked to admit, it’s what he chose to live with over the past year. It started the moment he met you if he was truly being honest.

He knew there was nothing left for him, no matter how much his heart clenched at the sound of your cries. He couldn’t be the one who was always taking care of you, loving you, when you didn’t feel what he felt. It was splitting him open, and you just kept taking pieces of him away — parts of him you would hold forever.

He let you cling onto him one more time, begging for him not to leave you. He let you believe he wouldn’t as he calmed you back in a false sense of security. Until you were asleep in his soft sheets later that night, leaving you lonely in the home you’d been sharing.

With only half of his belongings with him, he pulled up to the project he had just completed. Even now, with not a single hope you would ever see it after he just abandoned you, there was still a light hope you’d be able to at least see it one day. If Steve was ever strong enough to face his heartbreak again.

595 notes · View notes

joansiefics · 3 years

Note

Hi! Can you please write prompts 24 and 29 (from the fluff section) with best friend Bucky please? The reader shows up at his apartment even though they canceled their plans together, but he ends up being glad that she came because they have such a cozy and enjoyable time. And maybe a bit of ✨feelings✨ work their way into the air as well. Thanks!

Perceptible-To-a-Super Soldier's Ears

BUCKY BARNES X READER

Prompt 24- “It’s pouring rain, why are you here?”

Prompt 29 - “Thank you for staying with me”

SUMMARY: Bucky cancels your traditional Saturday night plans after a terrible mission and you decide to surprise him at his doorstep.

WARNINGS: Mentions of Death and Killing

A/N: hey, I hope everyone is doing well!!! I'm sorry it took so long to write this (at least I'm back to writing requests in a week from getting them) I hope this is what you had in mind and that you are satisfied.

MARVEL MASTERLIST || PROMPT LIST

REQUESTS are OPEN - I absolutely love it when I receive requests

Add yourself to my TAGLIST

When you were just a six years old girl, your innocence was exchanged for the horrible guilt of each killing HYDRA had forced upon you. And years later the vivid images of each life you ended - the victims' pleading faces, their eyes entrances to their bleeding souls in comparison to their pulped lips, the blood drizzling down their chin. Every little detail still imprinted into your memory, haunting you in your sleep.

When Steve first introduced you to the team, you were a shy, distrustful sixteen year old, talking only when necessary, hiding behind Steve when someone else entered a room or busy yourself in work to ignore the presence of others. With little to no talking and barely making yourself known, everyone still took a liking to you rather quickly, especially one ex-HYDRA-assassin. The Winter Soldier. James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes.

The small lopsided smiles he exchanged with you from across the room, the quiet "good morning's" handed to you on a breakfast plate when he dishes up his plate from behind you, the silent conversations spoken between empathetic eyes and the first night he helped you calm down from a nightmare. These were all contributions leading up to the best friendship you never thought you'd find.

The night he calmed you down from your nightmare, he suggested a movie night - junk food, cuddling, talking and the best movies ever. And from that night on, it became tradition. After a long week's work you would hang out at each other's apartments, watch a movie, eat junk food, cuddle and talk about what there's to talk about. This continued for about two years and plans rarely got canceled, unless it was utterly necessary.

It was nearing the evening and you were searching for some clothes to put on before Bucky came over, when you got the phone call. "Hey Y/N" your heart contracted and relaxed hard against your ribcage at the sound of his voice. 'control yourself Y/N, it's just Bucky!!!' you steadied your breathing in hopes to calm your perceptible-to-a-super soldier's ears heartbeat before your voice traveled through the telephone line. "Hey, how was the mission?" you ask, putting on your last shoe. "That's why I called" you froze at his words, your heart rate accelerating at the thought of something going wrong on the mission. "What happened? Are you okay? Are you hurt? Was it-" "Y/N" Bucky called for your attention "I'm okay" he let out a small chuckle at your concern, but then the line got dead silent.

You could hear your heart tearing a bit further with every few words spoken. "I know we would have hung out at your apartment tonight and all, but after today's mission I just need a break and I'm really tired and I don't want to get ready to leave my apartment now... So I was wondering if we could maybe continue our tradition next week?" "It's okay Bucky, I understand. I want you to sleep and get comfortable after your hard work. There will be many more Saturday nights for movie nights." you assured him. "You sure?" you don't miss the lingering sadness in his voice and the throat clearing as disguise for a small sob. "100% sure" "Thank you so much for understanding Y/N, it means a lot to me" "no problem...NOW GO LIE DOWN!!" you cover your strictness with an ending laugh, but your heart is shattered into uncountable pieces - 'I'm not seeing him tonight, just another week...maybe I can go check up on him tomorrow?' "Yes mother... bye Y/N" "Bye Bucky" and then you hang up.

'The mission must have been terrible, why else would he cancel?' Then it streaks you - 'it was a HYDRA mission... he probably relived so many memories. He needs support through this time. That's why he sounded so sad to cancel!!' when you force your thoughts to stop and not make conclusions or bad assumptions you notice that you've already picked up your car keys and were halfway through the door.

------

In the car you push the key into the ignition and force the key right. Before you depart though you see the fuel gauge alerting you that your vehicle does not contain enough fuel for your trip to Bucky. "Damn it!" you hit the steering wheel, before yanking your door back open and storming out. 'Guess I'll have to walk then' you start your trip to the pizza place to pick up the usual pizza order. As you walk you can hear the thunder rolling in, hoping that you'll be snuggled next to Bucky when the storm starts and not be unfortunate enough to get caught in it.

------

"Thank you" you thank the lady handing you the pizza boxes and head out the door to your next stop - the small convenience store for some more snacks. The clouds were joining together fast, accompanying the howling wind and coloring the sky a dark grey. You wore goosebumps on your sleeves and let the wind blow your hair into different directions. 'Please don't start to rain before I get to Bucky'

------

While you chose out the snacks you could hear the faint dripping of the cloud's tears coming in contact with the roof and tar road. The smell of petrichor wafts through the air and twirls into your nose. For a moment you relax at the earthy smell, but then you remember "Bucky needs all the support he can get in this time' and you hurry to the cashier with the basket full of refreshments.

When you exit the convenience store it is pouring rain. 'Great, just great' you sigh and zip down your jacket to protect most of the food from getting wet. You run from one underroof location to the next, preventing being soaked to the bone, but the last underroof hiding to Bucky's apartment is quite the distance and you prepare yourself for the shower.

------

*knock, knock, knock*

Bucky opens the door, only to find you drenched on his doorstep. Bucky takes a quick glance outside his door to the wet outside world. "It's pouring rain, why are you here?" you don't know if you should take his words as an offense or as words of concern, but you go with the former. "I know you didn't wanna hang out, but then it struck me that it was a HYDRA mission and then you sounded so defeated over the phone, so I thought you might want some comfort or some food or both... and now that I think about it, it was stupid to come here in the first place, I mean after you told me that you wanted some rest and sleep and now I'm talking to much," you immediately stop your rambling when you see Bucky's face contort into one of adoration. "I think you read the situation right doll... why don't you come in and I can find you something dry and comfortable to wear?" he asks, already ushering you into his apartment.

"Why didn't you take the car?" Bucky yells over his shoulder as he searches through his closet for something you can wear. "I wanted to, but when I started the car I saw that I wouldn't have enough fuel to make it to here, sooo...." Bucky throws you a shirt and some sweatpants and you thank him before making your way to the bathroom to get changed.

"Which movie do you want to watch?!" Bucky asks through the bathroom door, pressing his ear against the wood, even though he could have heard you from anywhere with his super soldier hearing. "We don't have to watch a movie if you don't want to!" you yell back, silently giving Bucky the opportunity to decide what he wants to do after the heart breaking mission. "No, I want to... I mean you didn't get soaked for nothing" his laugh mends your broken heart. "Then you can pick the movie!" "Okay doll!"

------

When you're finished getting dressed you make your way to the living room, where you find Bucky huddled up in blankets, between the pizza boxes and snacks, with the movie ready to start. You make yourself comfortable next to him and snuggle into his chest. 'remember this is all about Bucky, make him feel special, he shouldn't make me feel special' "Do you want to talk about the mission before we start the movie?" you politely ask, worried for your friend's mental stability . "Well... when we were infiltrating the base, I just got these flashbacks about the innocent lives I've taken, I could see their pained faces and pleading eyes looking at the monster in front of them, and then I saw the room where they brainwashed me, it was all just to much for me"

You lift your head from Bucky's chest and take his vibranium hand into your hand, to show him that he is not a monster and neither a harmful soldier. "You are not a monster... do you see me as a monster?" "No" "Well then you shouldn't think of yourself as one, because I also killed those people, Bucky, I didn't have a choice and neither did you" you let a moment of silence follow for the words to sink into his mind and utter the last words "I love you for who you are Bucky and you should never forget that" "You love me?" "Uhh...yeahhh, and I have for the past two years, sine that first night you calmed me from my nightmare." you shyly fumble with the hem of your shirt, shocked at the confession that slipped past your lips. "And you're only telling me this now because....?" "because I didn't want to ruin our friendship, you're the only person I have left and I don't want to lose you too." You start to tear up at the thought of losing Bucky, but he is quick to soothe your fear "Who said anything about leaving? he takes your fumbling hands into his, gaining your attention. "I love you too Y/N, more than just a friend."

There's a few moments of silence exchanged between the two of you - the conversation playing on repeat in your minds, loving and longing looks shared and Bucky's thumb circling your wrist. "Y/N, I want to ask you something" "Go ahead" you are almost to afraid to listen to his words 'what if he doesn't want this?!' "would you like to be my girlfriend?" those seven words rocked your world and for the second time that day your heart shatters into pieces, but this time from the loud, excited thumping against your ribcage. "Yes, yes, yes, yes!!! I would love that Bucky!!!" you can't contain your excitement and it makes Bucky give you a proud, genuine smile.

------

After the movie, you were still cuddled up to Bucky's side, resting your head on his chest and listening to the rhythmic beats of his heart. You were playing with his dog tags, tracing the engraved titles and flicking it between your different fingers. You let out a yawn and rub your heavy eyes. "How are you still not sleeping Bucky?" "It might take a while with all the memories floating inside my head, but I'll eventually fall asleep, don't you worry about me doll" "I'm always here if you need to talk okay? Even when I'm sleeping at 03:00 in the morning" you give him the only smile you could muster up in your tired state 'just imagine how tired he should be feeling' Bucky lets out a breathless laugh and the rumbling in his chest, sends shock waves straight to your tired and battered heart.

Your eyes flutter closed, but you once again force them open - perhaps you were scared that it was all just a dream and that when you woke up, you'd have to, once again, walk with the secret of loving Bucky and having no idea what to do with it. Bucky bends over and leaves a kiss at the top of you head "Thank you for staying with me" he whispers into your ear. "Always"

------------------------------------------------

TAGLIST: (if your name is crossed out, I couldn’t tag you)

@buckyzzrogers @buckyandstevesbitch @ooopsthiswasnotsupposedtohappen @marvelouslyriddikulus

#comfort bucky #bucky barnes imagine #bucky fluff #bucky fic #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky x reader #bucky imagine #Bucky Nightmares #Bucky Barnes #requests open #prompt list

184 notes · View notes

badassbuchanan · 4 years

Text

No Goodbye

Part 2 Part 3

Plot: Bucky’s left to pick up the pieces of a broken heart

Warnings: you will cry, angst, this is very very sad, sweet Bucky

Word Count: 4295

A/N: decided to branch out and do a non-smut angsty fic - it’s my first one please be nice 💕

“Bucky?” Y/N’s voice whispered worriedly as she watched the small team walk back through the compound with their heads hung low. The long haired super soldier looked over at her with saddened eyes, his heart sinking when he saw the hopefully look on her face.

Y/N’s hearted thudded against her chest, her bottom lip quivering as she watched the team look at her sympathetically. “Bucky, where’s Steve?” Worst case scenarios fled through her mind as she noticed the heartbreak in Bucky’s eyes, she’d never seen her boyfriend’s best friend look so sad.

Bucky’s eyes closed for a moment too long, the raw emotion in her voice breaking his heart. He felt tears begin welling up in his eyes, knowing he had to be the one to break the news. He let out a deep sigh, trying to steady his breathing and keep his sadness at bay as he braved a glance over at Y/N.

“Steve’s gone, Y/N.” Bucky mumbled, hearing a whimper of pain leave the girl’s lips as she broke down in front of him. Her hands flew up to cover her mouth, loud sobs filling the room as Bucky flinched in weakness, he couldn’t stand to see her like this. “He’s not coming back, Doll.” He was still trying to process the fact himself, saying it out loud only made it that much more real.

“No,” She shook her head in denial, tears streaming down her face as Bucky let his head fall back to conceal his tears. He started walking towards her, only knowing too well how hard it was to lose Steve. “No, Bucky, he promised.”

“I know,” Bucky blew out shakily as he tugged her almost lifeless body towards him, wrapping his arms around her tightly as she sobbed against his chest. He sighed solemnly when he felt her hands clinging to the material of his t-shirt, her tears soaking through the thin material and onto his chest. “I know, Doll.”

Bucky knew more than anyone how it felt to have a promise broken by Steve. Bucky had just had to say goodbye to his childhood best friend, but Y/N had just lost the love of her life.

She’d fallen for Steve the first day she met him. He was like a prince in a world full of frogs. She didn’t know if it was a forties thing, or a Steve thing, but he was everything she’d ever dreamed of. Steve loved Y/N just as much, she was his little piece of light in a cruel world. She reminded him of what was important and made him feel like part of him was still normal.

Shhh.” Bucky soothed her quietly, squeezing his eyes shut tightly as he rested his chin against the top of her head. Her head began to spin, trying to process what was happening as she cried helplessly against Bucky’s chest. “It’s gunna be okay.” Bucky breathed out shakily, repeating the words that Steve had said to him before he left, hoping it would somehow calm her down. Although right now, he didn’t even believe those words himself.

———

It had been a few weeks, but the days seemed to all blur into one for Y/N. She didn’t leave her room unless it was to run errands, but even then, she avoided everyone. She felt so out of place, like everywhere she was, it was wrong. It didn’t matter if she was making a cup of tea in the kitchen, reading a book in the living room, taking a shower in the bathroom or trying to have a nap on her bed. It all seemed so wrong, like she shouldn’t be doing anything without Steve.

“I don't know who I am anymore, Buck.” She sighed numbly, her mind spaced out in mourning, her eyes damp with tears just as they had been every day before. Bucky was the only person she’d spoken to, and that was only because she knew he needed someone to talk to. Maybe he liked talking to her because she reminded him of Steve.

Bucky’s heart ached as he watched her face, so straight and emotionless. She was so broken, he heard her crying when no one else was around, especially at night. It was as if she was so tired of being in pain that her face was no longer able to show expression.

“I think if anyone can relate to not knowing who they are, Y/N. It’s me.” He pursed his lips together in a sympathetic smile, leaning his hands against the edge of the mattress from where he sat on her bed. He watched her carelessly fold the clean washing, trying to harden the pain inside her heart.

“Yeah and who helped you through that, Buck?” She hissed out sadly, angry at herself for still being so helpless and lost after weeks. She hadn’t said Steve’s name since the day she’d found out he’d gone. Bucky had noticed it, but he wasn’t sure if anyone else had.

Bucky sighed as he tilted his head absentmindedly, he hated Steve for leaving him, but he hated him more for leaving her. A frown crinkled on her forehead as she concentrated on stopping her tears from escaping her eyes, letting out a quiet sniffle as she kept her eyes focused on the washing in front of her.

“God, I just feel so alone.” She sighed in frustration, throwing the pair of shorts she was folding down on the bed. Her eyes closed as she wrapped her arms around herself, a tear trickling down her cheek as she sniffed again.

“You’re not alone, Doll.” Bucky whispered sadly, trying to be supportive as his eyes softened and he carefully reached his flesh arm out to hold her hand.

“But I am, Buck.” She pulled away from his hand as soon as she felt it, the action so sudden it made Bucky jump as she took a step away from him. “You’ve got Sam and Sharon.” She gritted her teeth at the mention of the girl that Steve had once kissed, her hands balling up into fists out of frustration. “Pepper’s got Morgan, Clint has his family, Peter’s got May, Fury’s got Maria, T’Challa’s got Shuri. But who do I got?” Her lips trembled as she pressed them together in a hard pout, looking down at the space in front of her. “He was everything I had and now he’s gone.”

Bucky listened silently to her rant, hanging his head as his heart broke at the shakiness of her angry voice. He fiddled with his hands, he knew nothing he could say would make her feel better. All she wanted was Steve.

“I don't even know why I’m still here.” She mumbled weakly, looking around the room that had once been filled with happy memories. It hurt, everything hurt. Living at the compound was a constant reminder of the life she had once shared with Steve. Her anger faded back to sadness as she closed her eyes tightly, breaking down in silent sobs as she thought about how they’d planned to spend their future together. They’d talked about it a lot. “When all this is over, we’ll move to Brooklyn. We’ll get married, pop out a couple of babies. Oh, and we have to get a dog.” The memory of Steve’s words caused an aching cry to leave her lips, his voice ringing through her mind as she felt her whole body go weak. “I can’t do this anymore.”

Bucky’s watery eyes widened in panic at her words, his head immediately turning to her as he instinctively reached his arm out towards her again. She was too helpless to pull away this time, letting his strong hand pull her body into his lap as she collapsed against him.

He was worried about how she was handing the process of grieving, knowing how much it had the power to manipulate thoughts. He didn’t want her doing anything stupid, anything irrational, anything harmful. He’d become so protective over her, knowing that she was the only other person who really understood what it was like losing Steve. Anytime she cried, Bucky was right there holding her.

“I’m sorry.” Bucky sobbed out, unable to control his emotions as he wrapped his arms around her, holding her as tight as he could. Y/N’s arms wrapped around his neck as she cried against him, a position she’d come to know so well. “I’m so sorry.” Bucky felt guilty, like he was the one responsible for Steve not coming back. He was there, he should’ve tried harder, said something to make Steve change his mind.

She whimpered against him, erratically breathing against his chest as she felt her throat closing up. The all too familiar feeling of heartache took over as her hand dropped to his metal arm, clinging to him tightly as she relaxed against his chest.

Bucky rocked them back and forth lightly, trying to soothe her as he broke down. He rubbed her back with his flesh hand, his head dropping close to hers as he held her close.

“I didn’t even get to say goodbye.” She sniffed sadly, her eyes puffy and cheeks red from the crying. Her face was lightly stained with red lines from where her tears had fallen, the salty liquid stinging her skin.

Bucky let out the breath he’d been holding in shakily, his heart aching at her words. Their burning cheeks touched as Bucky’s hand came up to massage the back of her head. He felt so responsible for Steve not coming back. “I’m sorry.”

She stayed there in his arms, his chest rising and falling against her side as she closed her stinging eyes. She inhaled the scent of his cologne, feeling safe in his lap as her heartbeat began to steady itself.

Bucky noticed the way her head pressed limply further against his bearded cheek, turning his head to face her as his hand cradled the back of her neck. “It’s gunna be okay.” He whispered as a soft smile washed over his reddened face, noticing her falling asleep in his arms.

”Will you stay with me tonight?” She whispered tiredly, her eyes blinking rapidly as she fought the inevitable exhaustion. “Please Buck, I don't want to be alone.”

A selfish wave of relief washed over Bucky as he held her, still processing Steve’s absence himself, he thanked his lucky stars that at least for one night, he wouldn’t have to be alone.

———

Weeks of Steve being gone had turned into months, his absence left a void, an emptiness that was inevitably never going away, both for Bucky and Y/N.

“Y/N?” Bucky’s voice deepened with concern as he threw the car keys in the fruit bowl, being warned of her bad state by F.R.I.D.A.Y as soon as he’d walked in through the front door. “Y/N.” He called out again, picking up his pace as he rushed through the compound to find her.

“She’s in Mr Roger’s room, Sergeant Barnes.” the AI spoke as Bucky began to panic, his heart sinking as he burst through the door of Cap’s old bedroom. No one had gone in there since he’d left, not even Y/N.

But that’s where she was, lying on the floor, looking up at the blank ceiling. Bucky sighed with his eyes closed before he walked over to her slowly, aware of her almost unconscious state.

His heart sped up immediately as he was hit with wave upon wave of memories of his best friend. The smell of the room, the shelves covered with small trinkets that were important to him, his record collection, the framed photo of Y/N and Steve next to his neatly made bed. It was all too overwhelming.

“What did you do, Doll?” He breathed out sadly as he crouched down next to her, his flesh fingers tracing over the empty bottle of asgardian liquor that lay in her limp hand. He carefully took the bottle from her, his eyes looking up at hers, glazed over with dilated pupils.

Y/N kept her head facing the ceiling, only moving her eyes to glance over at him. “I got lost.” She mumbled almost inaudibly, catching a hiccup in her throat as her eyes closed.

How could she tell Bucky the truth when it was so silly. She’d gone in there to talk to him. No, she wasn’t crazy, she knew he wasn’t going to be there. She thought she would find comfort in being around his belongings, that it would make her feel connected to him. But it didn’t work.

Bucky sighed, letting his fingers intertwine with hers as he held her hand. His thumb rubbed over her skin soothingly as he bit the inside of his lip, the helpless feeling inside of him was starting to become permanent. He desperately wanted to help her, to make everything okay. But there was nothing he could do except be there for her.

“I wasn't good enough for him.” Her words made Bucky’s heart ache with sadness, his eyes closing as he squeezed her hand a little tighter. “Maybe if I was better, he would've stay-”

“Don’t say that.” Bucky shook his head, his voice cracking a little. Y/N was the most beautiful, funny, talented girl he’d ever met. The more time he spent with her, the more he realised that. It hurt him to hear her say that she wasn’t good enough, that she had convinced herself that was the reason Steve had left. Bucky cursed Steve in his head, frustrated with what his decision to leave had done to her.

Y/N blamed herself for Steve not coming back. She hated herself for not being a good enough reason for him to stay. She sat up most nights trying to figure out exactly what it was that made him decide to go, but she couldn’t understand it.

"I thought he loved me.” Bucky felt the tears streaming down his face as he squeezed his eyes shut tightly. It physically pained him to hear how much she was hurting, the constant torment going on inside of her mind. How lost she felt, how deep Steve’s leaving had cut her up inside.

“He did, Y/N. He still does.” Bucky’s words spluttered out between sniffs. The alcohol was helping to numb Y/N’s pain, her tears silently rolling down her cheeks instead of her usual aching whimpers and heavy breathing.

“He didn’t even say goodbye.” She mumbled painfully, her wording changing from the perspective she’d had a few weeks ago. Her sleepless nights had given her more than enough time to think, and she’d come to the conclusion that Steve knew what his plan was, so he had the chance to say goodbye, to be upfront and tell her, but he didn’t. Why? The most obvious answer in Y/N’s mind was because he didn’t care, not about her anyway. “Don’t sit there and tell me you do that to someone you love.”

Bucky stayed silent for a moment, pondering in his own thoughts as Y/N went back to staring at the ceiling. At some point since he’d left, Bucky had questioned continuing to defend his best friend. Bucky had watched what Steve’s decisions had done to Y/N, what his actions were still doing to her and in Bucky’s eyes, nothing on earth was worth causing her this much sadness.

“C’mon, Doll. You’re tired, I know. Let me take you to bed.” He whispered through his heavy breathing as he scooped her up, lifting her body effortlessly as he cradled her in his arms. Y/N didn’t object, nuzzling her face into his chest as her arms wrapped around Bucky’s neck.

Bucky going go bed with Y/N had become routine most nights since the first time she’d asked him to stay with her, they both enjoyed the company and knew neither of them expected anything more than a warm body to hold.

He carried her down the hall until they reached her room, laying her carefully on the bed once they were inside. He pushed the loose hair away from her face, rubbing his thumb lovingly over her cheek as he admired her.

“I’m just getting you some comfy clothes, I’ll be right back.” Bucky whispered as he leaned over her, pressing a gentle kiss on her forehead. She nodded softly, not taking her eyes off of him as he she watched him move around the room.

Y/N was beyond grateful for Bucky, he’d been by her side the whole time. Whenever she needed him, he was right there. She felt guilty for lashing out at him sometimes, when all he’d ever done was shower her with love and patience. She wondered if he’d had time himself to process Steve leaving, or if he was suppressing his emotions in order to support her. Either way, Bucky had always made sure that she never felt completely alone, he took pride in looking after her, sometimes it was the only distraction from his destructive thoughts.

“Here you go.” He hummed sweetly, sliding his hand under her back to lift her torso up from the mattress. She sat up obediently as Bucky’s hand let go of her, turning around so that she could get changed privately.

She smiled shyly at his gentlemanly ways, somewhat reminded of the way Steve was. She looked down at her body as she pulled her shirt over her head, maybe if she looked like a supermodel, Steve would’ve stayed.

She blinked rapidly to contain her tears, her lips dropping into a pout as she quickly changed into the clothes Bucky had set out for her. A sudden wave of self consciousness hit her as she turned her body to face away from Bucky, laying back down on the bed to hide her body under the covers.

“It’s okay if you want to leave, Buck. I understand.” Her voice came out as a whimper, her eyes dropping to look down at the mattress as she heard Bucky turn back around to face her.

He sighed sadly as he looked down at her curled up alone on the bed, wishing she knew that he needed her as much as she needed him. He knew after tonight that she was blaming herself for Steve leaving, forcing herself to feel unworthy and unloved.

“Hey,” Bucky called out to her softly, pulling back his side of the blanket as he slid in beside her. He gently rotated her body to face him, her eyes avoiding his as he pulled her against his chest. “I’m not going anywhere. I pro-”

“Don’t.” She cut him off, shaking her head as she slid her arms up around his neck. “Don’t make any promises.” Her heartbeat quickened as the sadness engulfed her. “Please.”

Y/N woke up the next morning in a dream like daze, feeling strong arms wrapped tightly around her, her cheek pressed against a warm chest rising and falling in a slow rhythm.

“Steve?” She whispered out sweetly, it was the first moment of peace she’d had in months. Then reality came crashing down on her, remembering Steve was gone. Bucky heard her say it, it was the first time she’d said Steve’s name since he left, his whole body froze as his heart ached sympathetically for her.

Y/N sighed sadly, pressing her face further into Bucky’s chest as she began uncontrollably sobbing. Wave upon wave of misery flooded her body as Bucky rubbed her back under the thin material of her t-shirt, trying his best to soothe her.

“Shhhh,” Bucky whispered gently, his metal hand playing with the back of her hair as he held her close. “It’s gunna be okay.”

Bucky had repeated Steve’s words to her almost every day, not that she knew they were Steve’s words, but he didn’t know if he was saying them to comfort her or himself. Either way, as time went on, it was getting harder to believe that it was going to be okay.

———

Y/N had taken a nap for the first time in almost six months. She’d woken up to an empty bed, an unusual occurrence, especially since Bucky had been wrapped up in her arms when she’d fallen asleep.

They’d grown so close since Steve had left, their friendship had blossomed into an unbreakable bond, a deep connection that no one could explain. They understood each other on a level of complexity that formed so rarely it was unheard of. They relied on each other.

She padded softly down the hallway, heading towards the sound of Bucky’s voice coming from the common area. She slowed her steps, gliding her palm along the cold wall as she caught part of his conversation.

“No, I can’t do this anymore.” Bucky hissed to whoever was on the other end of the phone, his voice agitated yet quiet, as if he didn’t want to be heard. “I’ve made up my mind. I’m leaving.”

Y/N’s heart sunk deep into her chest, her head spinning in disbelief as she moved into view of the doorway just in time to see Bucky hang up the phone.

“Bucky?” She whimpered sadly, her chest heaving as it tightened around her heart, her eyes widened innocently as her bottom lip quivered. “You’re leaving?”

Bucky looked up at where she was standing, his eyebrows arching in panic as he realised what she’d walked into. “Y/N.” He started deeply, a lump forming in his throat as he watched her react. “I can explain.”

She shook her head rapidly as she squeezed her eyes shut, a bubbling sense of betrayal and anger erupted in her body. “You’re just the same as he is!” She yelled as she felt tears welling up in her eyes, turning to run back to her room as she thought about going through the process of losing someone again. She couldn’t take it.

She slammed the door behind her, bursting into tears as she paced around her room, slightly hyperventilating as the fear overwhelmed her.

“Y/N,” Bucky burst through her bedroom door, shutting it loudly behind him without a care as he walked over to her. “Calm down.”

She shook her head as Bucky grabbed her by her upper arms, forcing her to stop pacing as she hung her head to avoid his eye contact. “Were you even going to tell me?”

“Stop.” Bucky’s voice hardened as he tried to get her to listen, his eyes softening with worry as his heart raced.

“Or were you just going to leave without saying goodbye?” She disobeyed his command, her anger turning into sadness as she looked up into his gorgeous blue eyes.

“Listen to me,” He spoke softly, gripping onto her arms tightly as his thumbs rubbed over of skin. She looked away from his eyes, her eyebrows arching in sadness as she anticipated what he was going to say. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“I can’t lose you too, Bucky. I can’t.” She panicked as she thought about losing Bucky the same way she’d lost Steve. She wanted to believe him, but how could she possibly know if he was telling the truth? Her lips stayed in a pout, her eyes glued to the right of his body.

Bucky sighed in frustration, his heart broke knowing she didn’t believe him. “Look at me!” He spoke loudly, shaking her arms a little as her glossy eyes finally met his. “I’m not going anywhere, okay?”

Y/N lifted her hands to hold onto the material of his shirt over his stomach, holding him close as if it would keep him there forever. “I heard you on the phone, Buck.”

“Yeah, I know.” Bucky smiled softly, slightly relieved that she was listening to him now as he admired her face. His flesh hand moved up to cup her cheek, rubbing her temple with his thumb. “You heard me telling Fury that I’m leaving, as in leaving the team, not leaving you.” He shook his head, his eyebrows arching as a sympathetic look covered his face.

Her eyes looked up at him with a soft sparkle that he hadn’t seen in a long time, he let out a shaky breath, his eyes softening as he smiled down at her. “You’re really not leaving?”

He shook his head as he watched her sigh in relief, his arms wrapping around her to hold her close. “I’m not going anywhere, doll.”

“Trust me, Y/N.” Bucky whispered as he admired her face, his thumb rubbing across her cheek soothingly. “It’s gunna be okay.” Something about the way Steve said those words made it sounds true, but when Bucky heard himself say it, it was hard for him to believe.

—��—

“What the hell am I supposed to tell Y/N?” Bucky looked over at his oldest friend, his eyes saddened with stress and responsibility. “She’s gunna ask questions, Steve.”

“Tell her I’ve left. That I’m not coming back.” Steve instructed the long haired super-soldier, sadly running his hand through his blonde hair.

“And you think she’s just gunna accept that?” Bucky shook his head as he kicked a pebble next to his foot absentmindedly. He looked back up at Cap, trying to make him understand. “She loves you, Steve.”

“Bucky, you know I have to do this.” Steve pressed his lips together as he looked sympathetically over at Bucky. His decision wasn’t an easy one, and his best friend trying to change his mind was only making it harder. “I’m leaving her with my best pal.”

Steve grabbed Bucky’s shoulder reassuringly, witnessing the distress on his face, what Steve was asking him to do was huge. “It’s gunna be okay, Buck.”

Bucky sighed, trusting that Steve knew what was best as he wrapped his arms around his friend to say goodbye. “No matter what happens, she can never find out the truth, Buck.”

tag list:

@harrysthiccthighss

@annestine

@bestofbucky

@be-patient-be-good

@nothing0is4here

@velvetcardiganbucky

@sexwithhiddlesbatch

@codyl-angdon

#bucky barnes #captain america #sebastian stan #marvel smut #sebastian stan imagine #sebastian stan oneshot #sebastian stan smut #sebastian stan x reader #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes oneshot #captain america smut #captain america imagine #captain america oneshot #bucky barnes smut #winter soldier #winter soldier smut #winter soldier imagine #winter soldier au

794 notes · View notes

widow-maximov · 3 years

Note

Hi can I request the the boys of the OG6 acting like older brothers of Natasha and then literally interrogating ceo!reader or something bc they’re known for being a player?

Natasha’s just watching them and being embarrassed.

You don’t have to if you don’t want to:)

Anything for you

Pairing: Natasha x Reader

Warning: Language, fluff, angst :3

Summary: Your past impacted your future and others trust, are you able to change for her?

Word count: 3.7k

My requests are always open so feel more than welcome to pop in a suggestion for the next story :3

⸻⸻⋙☸⋘⸻⸻

Being in a relationship has never been easy in your life, especially since you are the richest person alive, along side with Tony Stark. Since your dad retired and gave you the company you were doing pretty good for someone your age.

You were a 'player' or well that's what people did describe you, but you liked to call yourself adventurous, it was more of a stress relief type of hook ups never more never less.

Half of the time you thought that since you have money people will use you for it so you kept your cold bitch face and kept going with life.

There was a reason behind that thinking, you remember like it was yesterday. Back when you had less responsibilities on your head, you did date.

There was this boy, who was the most respected person in school, he always helped everyone and even turned you into a bit more social and nicer person to which you gained popularity.

You were practically swooned over this guy, not him as a boy but his personality, he 'loved' you or at least that's what you thought. Since you gained respect of practically every person in the school, there were rumours that your boyfriend only used you for the money.

He had a whole plan of how to get your money, by marrying you like he was going to stick with you for a very long time just so he can take your money and leave you dry.

At first you didn't want to believe it until you overheard his conversation with his friends, he was laughing and just being a dick about your whole relationship, telling them what you told him in secret.

You ended up getting revenge, since you were able to get away with most things, you actually punched him and outed him to the whole school with how he treated you, he was suspended and your father moved you to another school for 'punishment' but he really did you a favour.

Every since that you questioned any relationships after that, whether it was with girls or boys, to you they all seemed the same as your ex. So you stuck with being single for sometime until you accidently slept with someone at a party and that's where you picked up the habits of sleeping around.

It did kind of stop when you took over after your dad retired but as soon as you were doing a good enough job and providing the best solutions for the issues that occurred, you practically had many women in your office, no matter the time.

You tried not to mix work with your sex life which meant your workers were your workers and nothing else but there was an exemption, there was a woman, her name is Ava, who used to work along side of your dad and now she works along side of you, she become your casual hook up which sometimes interfered with work.

Since you always believed in good, Ava suggested for you to work with the Avengers, you agreed and reached out to Tony and offered a deal to help him with anything he needs but you wanted intel on everything they do which meant you were there pretty often.

When you first met the team, it was only a couple of them as most were away from a mission, they were a family that you wanted and lacked. Your father never was a feeling type of guy and your mother never really cared unless she didn't get her money.

The Avengers were different and even if you weren't physically fighting with them, you helped them out a lot since they ruined a lot of property to which you were quick to act to some point you were considered their teammate.

When you met this one particular team mate, you instantly knew she was different. You knew she existed from them being featured on the news but face to face with these people were so different. She was the reason you changed so much.

The more you started to spend time with the Avengers the more you were fascinated by her. Natasha Romanoff, the Black Widow, the Russian, the redhead, you preferred stunning but Natasha would have to do.

She was just as into you as you were into her and you wasn't hiding it, you were obvious which only encouraged her to continue her exploring. Everyone warned her about you but she was too blind and stubborn to care.

You stopped sleeping around when you started to hang around the team more often, which didn't go unnoticed by your own company, especially Ava who worked with you, was she jealous? Of course, to the point where she tried to ruin your chance with Natasha.

You were busy that day, like really busy, ever since you were taking things with Natasha at some pace, you would neglect your work and overload Ava, she didn't mind it because in return she wanted you and she was going to succeed.

She was all over you to which you never paid any attention, your mind was occupied with Natasha, you literally did everything to spend more of your time with the Russian rather than here being a CEO.

You was standing near the elevators, talking to one of your other business partners and Ava was next to you since she was in a way involved into your business.

Natasha was planning to visit you at work as you couldn't leave this time, she wants to watch you be a badass CEO, it turned her on when you bossed people around plus it was more time together so she didn't mind.

Natasha appeared out of the Elevator to which she was spotted by Ava, there was a smirk at her lips as she started her plan. When you and the business partner made a joke, she laughed as she placed her hand gently on your shoulder.

Natasha saw it all, she narrowed her eyes and waited for you to push her away, here where the problems comes. The company didn't know who you starting to change for, so when the next person saw Natasha and where she was looking, they made a comment.

"I wouldn't look so surprised, they had a thing on and off all the time, since Y/n took over, Ava has been sneaking around but we all know"

Natasha nodded with a fake smile and turned around to the elevator, it took everything in her to turn around because all she wanted to do was walk towards you and Ava and literally kill yous on spot.

When Natasha arrived back, the team noticed her sudden change in her behaviour.

"Nat are you okay?" Steve questioned first as he observed the redhead.

She stiffly nodded and proceeded to walk out to her room but Thor stopped her "Okay, you're not okay now tell us what's wrong."

Natasha faced her team mates "It's stupid"

Clint shook his as he sipped his drink "It's not stupid if it's upsetting you"

Tony crossed his arms "Okay, spill Romanoff"

Natasha sighed as she walked over to where they were and sat in between them "I'm having doubts"

Bruce's head popped out from underneath a table "Doubts about what?"

"About what's going on between me and Y/n.." Natasha hesitantly told them.

Steve's frowned at her "Why?"

"I went to visit Y/n at work today and I hate to admit it but I don't think the player habits have stopped, it just worries me that I am being maybe used.." As Natasha finished, she was looking anywhere else but them.

Tony pulled Natasha into his side "It's okay, you have us to protect you, also I think Fury was looking for you so you might want to check that out first"

She nodded and just when she was about to stand up, Tony pulled her into a hug and suddenly everyone wants to hug her to which they did. They had their turn whispering sweet things to Natasha to calm her a little.

"We are having a party later" Tony announced just before the Russian left, she nodded at him and as soon as she left, they turned to each other.

"Okay, here is the plan, the party is there to keep her occupied whilst we question Y/n. I'm not going to allow a player break her sweet heart" Tony spoke up again as he looked from Steve to Bruce.

"I will get the ropes ready..." Clint stated as if he done this before.

Thor looked at Clint confused "I want to ask but at the same time I don't"

Tony rolled his eyes "It doesn't matter, we are going to find out and then decided what we should do with Y/n if it's true"

They all nodded and did their secret handshake that Natasha wasn't apart off because it was dedicated to her to protect her. They split and went to fulfil their parts of this secret mission.

Tony alerted you of the party, Steve kept his eyes on the door to see if you arrive, Bruce takes care of Ava or any other people, Thor takes you away as he is very convincing and Clint prepares for anything that could somehow disrupt the interrogation.

You were worried, each time you would message Natasha there would be no reply, that never happened before which was even more worrying. Your first irrational thought was to sleep with someone to take off the stress but after taking a deep breath you knew this isn't a way to solve this, you needed to talk to Natasha.

As soon as you received a text from Tony about a party, there was some sort of relief in your mind, she was busy with preparing maybe that's why she couldn't answer you.

You told Ava about the party so she cancelled any late meetings, any parties that Tony Stark planned had everyone invited so since you were a business partner of Tony, your whole company was invited meaning Ava was going to be there.

You always had a emergency suit in your office for unannounced parties when you had been stuck at the company for too long. You was ready within minutes and was out the door alone as quick as possible, in hopes that you will talk to Natasha before she gets lost in the part world.

You rushed over and as soon as you gotten into the building Thor stood in your way "Oh hello Thor, sorry I can't talk I'm in a bit of a rush.."

He simply smiled at you "It's okay but Tony really needs you, it has to wait"

You were going to protest but he pulled you along with him, he was much more stronger than you so you had no chance and just followed him.

He didn't simply let you walk in, he pushed you inside as he locked the door behind him, you huffed as you turned to face the door that now was locked, you looked around and suddenly Tony with Clint emerged from the wall.

"Woah, that's cool" You had your brows raised at their new thing.

"So why was I shoved in here?" You questioned now with a serious face.

Clint walked over to you and before you could move away he had you tied with this new invention, you looked at him with shock and then back at the ropes, he placed you down on a chair as suddenly everyone else but Natasha walk into the room.

Now you are surrounded by 5 Avengers death staring you like you had killed someone that was related to them "What is happening?"

Tony had a serious face "You're going to tell us about Ava"

You frowned in confusion "What are you talking about?"

Steve had his arms crossed "We want to know what is going on between you and Ava"

The boys tried their best to keep this whole thing a secret but Natasha was a spy after all so she knew what they were doing, she didn't want to stop them because if it meant somehow getting out the truth without lies she was okay with it, obviously to some extent, she didn't want them to hurt you so she observed from the other room.

"Is there suppose to be something going on between me and her?" You questioned as you stared at Steve with a serious face.

Bruce walked closer as he bend down to your face "There is 5 of us and just you, think wisely before answering Y/l/n"

Were you scared? A little, he was right you were alone and no one knew you were here, but you knew they wouldn't do anything to you well at least that's what you'd like to think.

"I will ask again, what is going on with you and Ava?" Tony spoke as Bruce walked back to where he stood before.

"Nothing is going on between me and her, what makes you think that?" You questioned this time.

Clint sighed as he dropped his hands "Because we know you were involved with her sexually"

You narrowed your eyes "So you five kidnapped me, tied and now you're asking me if I'm still sleeping with Ava, acting like this is your business because?"

Tony scoffed "Because you're messing with our family and we don't like people who hurt our family.."

"I'm not messing with no one-" You were quick to disagree but stopped yourself when you realised who they were referring to.

"You mean Natasha..." You spoke but rather to yourself than them.

"I'm not messing with Natasha" You stated simply.

"Then why is Ava all over you?" Clint asked as he crossed his arms this time.

"How am I suppose to know, I'm not a mind reader"

Clint faced Tony "Okay, I believe Y/n"

You smiled slightly at Clint, but his comment only caused an argument, your eyes wondered around the room, that's when you noticed that the corner of the room is different half way up as if there was glass, not making it obvious that you knew.

You cleared your throat "Can I say something?"

They all looked back at you and nodded in sync "I know yous don't trust me but I will try everything to show you that I don't have bad intentions when it comes to Natasha, now please can you let me go I really need to go"

Tony narrowed his eyes "If you want to show us that we can trust you then tell us where you are in such a rush"

You swallowed hard, you didn't want Natasha to find out this way so you tried your luck again "I can't tell you, I need to go"

Tony inhaled sharply as he looked over at the boys "Well what do you guys say about a round of beers and come back here in an hour to see if Y/n will say something then"

Thor smirked "We can also put the heating on, making it a little too hot here for our little Y/n here"

They all nodded and there was a sense of panic across your face "Okay stop, I will speak"

They all had a smirk and you just continued "I am in a rush to talk to Natasha.."

"Why?" Steve spoke as he walked a little closer to you.

"Well I was planning to do this face to face not through the glass but I'm head over hills with Natasha and I was planning to ask her out but I guess now she knows" You sighed with slight disappointment.

Tony was the one frowning with confusion "What do you mean? Through glass?"

You looked over at the glass "If you really think you know Natasha then think twice, because this woman is a spy, she is behind that glass listening to this"

Clint face palmed himself "I knew this was too good to be true"

Tony pulled out his remote that controlled the glass, he turned off the camouflage and there she stood, with her arms crossed and an embarrassed look across her face, well it was a death stare but you could tell them apart.

As your eyes landed on her face, a smile found it way on your lips really quickly, she always did that to you and you loved that feeling even if you were slightly terrified of it but you would do anything for Natasha even deal with your own issues for her.

Clint walked over as he untied you and allowed you to stand up with a little whine from the pain that the rope left behind, you looked at the boys and they moved out of your way, you looked at them and gave them a small nod as you proceeded your way out.

"You better not hurt her Y/l/n or you'll regret it" Tony simply whispered but just enough so you heard him, you looked at him and nodded with a smile.

You walked out of the room and shutting the door behind you, taking a deep breath and finally looking to your right as your eyes were met with the Russian's green ones, she was staring at you from across and all you wanted to do was pull her into you.

Nothing else but her was on your mind, you walked over to her and just stared at her without saying anything. You didn't even know what words would be right to say so instead she took your hand and pulled you to a less visited balcony.

She stood couple steps away from you to which she spoke up first "Did you mean it?"

Her naturally raspy voice was music to your ears, so you simply nodded because words could betray you quite easily, she sighed with relief as she looked down.

The boost of courage coursed through your body, you took those couple steps towards her as you placed your hand under her chin, making her look up at you.

"Natasha I am sorry if I made you feel like you were nothing more than some cheap hook up because you aren't and you never will be." You started off with an apology still holding her chin.

"You mean so much to me, you out of everyone could make me want to change is a lot for me, I knew the second that I would do anything for you that I was falling for you" This time you held her face with both of your hands as your eyes started to gloss.

"I also never told you how stunning you look" You manged to chuckle out before letting tears slowly fall from your eyes.

She chuckled with you as she wiped your tear of your cheeks "Thank you"

"I'm also sorry for them acting like that" Natasha tucked a fallen hair behind your ear.

You shook your head "You don't need to be sorry because if you made you more at ease then I would even let them kidnap me everyday if it meant you would feel better"

A smile made its way on her lips this time "I think I'm falling for you too" She whispered it as she searched in your eyes for any emotions.

You smiled with a relief sigh "We can take this at any pace you want and if you ever doubt anything, talk to me I will even take a lie detector test for you Nat"

She giggled as she nodded, instead of replying she hugged into your chest with a smile across her lips, you let your arms snake around her and close your eyes at her warmth.

You pulled away slightly just enough to be inches away from each other lips, you looked into her eyes and with confirmation from both parts you kiss her, your eyes flattered shut as if to see if this wasn't a dream.

You pulled away and rested your forehead against hers as you looked into her eyes, completely being pulled deeply into this moment, not realising that practically everyone could see this, but as long as you had Natasha with you, you didn't care.

The next day, you made Natasha meet you at the company along with Ava, Natasha worried rushed to you as she spotted you. Her eyes were quick to narrow at Ava.

You looked over at Natasha and with a smile you walked over to her as you took her hand and walked back to where you were, this time Ava had her eyes narrowed at Natasha.

"What am I doing here Y/n/n?" The redhead spoke up as she looked over at you.

"This is my way of showing that you can trust me Natty" You looked back at her with a smile.

She was still confused, so you looked over at Ava as you held a letter out to her, she hesitantly took it and opened it as her eyes scanned the paper so quickly.

"You're moving me to another work place?!" She screamed as she looked back at you.

You nodded with a smile across your lips "Yes, I have heard from so many people that you have been complaining about getting here so I did you a favour and moved you closer to where you live"

You pulled Natasha into you but kept your eyes on Ava, who pointed at Natasha "This is your fault, if you weren't here I would still have my chance"

You rolled your eyes, the Russian was ready to knock her out but you held her by her waist pretty firmly as you spoke "Don't blame this on others, this is all on you, it might be hard to understand for you but I didn't want anything else from you, now go pack your stuff as your new place awaits you"

She scoffed as she stormed away, you waved her goodbye as you giggled along with Natasha, you looked over to the redhead at your side, she smiled at you and without words, she kissed you to which you accepted it with open arms.

You wanted everyone to know she was taken by you and you were taken by her. She made you happy and you would do anything to prove to her that she is the one who has your heart.

⸻⸻⋙☸⋘⸻⸻

If you want to join my tag list, click here and enjoy my future posts.

Tag list: @eilarch, @wandanatblogs, @madamevirgo @diaryoflife, @theprassebox, @wymer, @marvelwomen-simp

#natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff fluff #natasha x reader #natasha fluff #black widow #natasha romanoff x reader #reader #marvel #the avengers #natasha romanov

210 notes · View notes

sweetsbfreex · 3 years

Text

my baby, my baby

brought to u by me watching IW for the millionth time

Summary: You ask Steve for one thing before the fight against Thanos (IW), but for the first time in however long he denies you of fulfilling this wish.

Warnings: language?

Pairing: Nomad, Bf!Steve x thanos daughter!reader

He was manning the quinjet, not all the way true. Sam was flying the jet to Wakanda, Steve slumped in his seat beside Sam, in deep thought. His chin is set into his palm, his arm sitting up on the armrest, and his palm covering half of his mouth. Looking further down his leg was jittering steadily.

What would happen next was a pretty big deal, none of you on the jet knew what could go wrong. So obviously tensions were at an all time high in this cooped up jet.

You rise up from your seat between Wanda and Nat. Walking yourself behind Steve’s chair. Your pointer finger taps his embellished shoulder, separating him from his apprehensive thoughts. He looks up at you and the creases that were once prominent in his forehead evaporated.

You don’t utter anything, only nudging your head behind you.

Follow me to the back.

Is what’s reciprocated when he too gets up from his seat, letting Sam know he’ll be up front in a second. Once you turn, he follows you down the small aisle to the side “room” away from all the prying ears.

Finally.

You step into the room first. You weren't going to lie, your heart was beating with so much force and it only grew as he walked past you into the room. You close the door behind you, turning, so you're facing Steve's attentive figure.

You only smile at him to some extent, prompted to show there were no ill intentions to asking him back here. When you see how nervous he looks, as you take his hand seating the both of you to a bench against the wall.

Your knees tenderly touch. He clears his throat coercing you to go on, raising an eyebrow in confusion.

“You alright doll?” he asks you, in a gentle manner. Taking the already linked palms shifting it from your lap to his. His other hand blanketing your combined hands.

“I’m okay. Are you?” you ask the question hesitantly, raising your spare hand to move aside the hair that fell over and veiled his eyes. You desperately wanted to make sure you got a good look at his face. You loved his face.

His cheeks go plump in a charming smile, and his hand squeezes yours back.

His hair was long. Longer than you would’ve ever imagined Steve would let it be. Either way you loved every inch of the gold locks. Yet, everytime you told him how much you loved it, despite his insecurity and slight annoyance with it. He'd always fall into a rampage down memory lane. Telling you how his late mother would've hounded him about the upkeep of his hair.

You adored that about him too. Loved, that he loved so hard and so full. He’d never forget the ones he loved no matter what.

“I’m swell, you don’t need to worry about me” he tells you.

You didn’t believe him one bit and you weren’t going to push him about it. You knew how he was...stubborn as ever. But, it was also ,by and large, your job to worry about him–– after loving him of course. Contrary to what he would say (Which was vice-versa.)

“We’re gonna be okay...okay? But I have something to ask you. And you can’t get mad.”

“I’m not promising that, but we won’t shout. We’ll talk it out–– whatever it is”

It was the best you were going to get from him and time was closing in on you guys being able to be like this, anway.

“I know how you are, but this is a really critical thing we're fighting for here. So, unless I'm in some type of grave danger. I don’t want you worrying about me on the field. No matter what...Make sure he doesn’t get that stone.” Your voice lets you down towards the end, starting to get scratchy and low.

He stands up in no time. His hands going to his belt, then to his hips, he finally raises one hand to run against his beard.

His facial hair, another thing in the endless things you loved about Steve Rogers.

When the stubble he usually shaves away kept growing into a full beard, it surprised you both. You in a hot kind of way, he became more adoring by day when decided to stop shaving.

You walked in on him one day. He was facing the scratched up mirror in a bathroom in a dingy hotel room. Running his fingers against his face, the other clutching onto the edge of the counter. Tilting his head back and to, eyes shifting as he looked over his face. It was another part of the effect of the serum he didn’t expect would happen.

Telling you a story as he wandered down memory lane again. How he had problems growing stubble as a sickly kid–– so behind on puberty. He even watched Bucky grow his first “stache” at sixteen, but that came to an abrupt stop when Bucky’s mother made him shave it off.

Steve thought It was weird to think that he could now also.

You were still sitting on the bench. Swiveling your body so you were facing your boyfriend, looking up at his fidgeting build with care.

Feeling like a child waiting for their parents to dispute whatever impending punishment they would grant.

“Why would you ask me that?” he finally, finally disrupts his silence. Scoffing at the offensive question.

He doesn’t look at you with anything negative, only confusion.

“Because. I don’t want you jumping in front of whatever it is in front of me...I know him, he’s my dad. He’ll do anything to get what he wants, even if it means I die.”

When Steve told you that it was actually Bruce calling and told you what he said. He looked at you baffled when the shirt you were about to put on dropped from your grasp.

Once you told him you had knowledge of Thanos and how you knew him, there was a pregnant silence in the air.

If anything it filled the rage towards Thanos in Steve even more, by the time you finished.

“Are you listening to yourself?” he questions you in disbelief, lips stuck in a sneer.

“Please. Just please, angel.” you maintain.

You don’t answer either of his questions and he truly hates that. He stays silent for a bit watching your seated figure, looking up at him with the saddest eyes you’ve ever given him. His puzzled eyes shift down to your bobbing leg and your hands wringing together with so much speed and anguish.

He could probably throw up right now.

And when he shifts his eyes up again, you keep that same look on your face waiting for him to say anything.

He sighs dejectedly, dropping his hands to his side, and walking himself back over to you. He sits closer to you than before. Extending a gloved hand to caress your cheek before fixing the flyaways from your sleek ponytail.

“I can’t. You’ll always be my priority, and I won’t promise something like that sweetheart” he tells you this languidly. His thumb starts to rub circles against your cheekbone, to calm you down, when he catches the way your eyes widen at his admission.

“Steve!” your voice breaks. So shocked, you can’t hold back the tears that build up and fall slowly over your face.

You couldn’t believe this. He’s supposed to love you. Time and time again he’d always remind you how much he loves you and how he’d do anything for you–– too hard to say no to you, his words. Thinking this over you pull your face away from his hold, looking down at your taut hands. This wasn’t a silly death wish. You had to make sure your father didn’t get what he desired, no matter what.

He hates having to watch you cry, but he doesn’t have much of a choice now. He needs to stand his ground, there was no way he would be arguing about this. And he does this, grabbing your face with a light hand, so you were face to face again.

"I love you so much. And if I have to choose between letting you die and Thanos losing. Or you living and watching the universe crumble, you know exactly what I'm gonna choose. I'm not losing you, not if I have anything to do with it"

Albeit how dumb it sounded, there is no notable instance in his life where’d let you perish over him.

“You’re not thinking this through” you hiccup.

“It’s you, isn’t it? There’s not much to think about” he smiles at you and as you look at him you can see his eyes glazing over.

His statement only causes you to cry more. You feel nothing but the pain in your heart and the repositioning of your body. It takes you a moment to realize you’re settled on his thighs sideways. His well built arm warmly wraps around your shoulder, your temple rests against his shoulder, and his lips are placing light kisses to the crown of your head.

You incline your head, “I love you too much” you say in an awed whisper, raising a hand to twirl in the strands at the back of his collar. Following that, you let your hand spread across the back of his neck pulling him down for a kiss.

“After this we’re done okay? We have our pardon and are going to buy whatever house you want to get. I’m gonna buy you the prettiest engagement ring money can buy, Gonna get whatever animals you want,” you chuckle at that part.

If there was one thing Steve learned while living incognito with you is that you’d save any animal if you were able to. Always stopping whenever you passed by any animal in need in the drary streets. Looking up at Steve, who’d always have to remind you that neither of you could give it the life it deserves right now. Opting to only go to the nearest convenience store to buy whatever safe animal food in sight.

His hand immediately clutches your face to wipe away the tears that fell without pattern. His smile grows fonder when you do the same. “‘Can paint the house whatever we decide...maybe even get a house big enough to fit the kids we’ll have?” he tells you the last part in such a timid manner, bearing one of his hands to clutch yours. His thumb running over your knuckles at full tilt.

The only thing you were able to give him was a stunned look. So shocked you were unable to react like a normal person.

You squeeze his hand tight only being able to stutter a “really?”

“Of course. I want to have a bunch of small Rogers with you, wreaking havoc around our house” he admits this to you, carrying out such strong eye contact. If his hand didn’t slither down your back, supporting you up and grounding you, you’d jump in glee.

Fuck. Neither of you had talked about this, but you were glad that you both were on the same page about his. You felt terrified but in a good way, wanting to wholly get this over with and start this dream life with Steve.

“And this is all gonna happen, because everything is going to go well. We’re gonna win, I don’t want you thinking like that or asking me something like that ever again. Thanos will never be on our list of priorities ever again.”

“I’m sorry, baby. I can’t wait to start that life with you” you respond, winding your arms around his neck, crashing your lips to his with force.

He pulls away without notice to place hasty kisses to your cheek, loving the giggles you emitted. Even so, the energy in the room shifts too soon when Sam knocks on the door. Steve allows him entrance.

“Sorry to interrupt, but we’re about to land Cap”

Steve responds by nodding his head once, stiffly. Letting him know he’d be out in a second.

You get off of his thighs, so the both of you were standing chest to chest. He claps your worried face. Pulling you into him with little force, so his lips could fall to your forehead, nose, and lips.

“Remember what I said and be safe, I love you”

“I love you” you recite, bringing his hand down to kiss his covered palm.

With that he envelops you in his arm, his cheek resting against the top of your head. Both of you breathing each other in. Your shoulders relaxing at his loving touch.

He’d do whatever needed to keep you safe and if it ended in his death, then so be it. You’d do the same for him in a heartbeat, there was no point in either of you arguing this one out.

––––

Everyone was tired, it seemed like this fight only dragged on with the never-ending monsters. But, with the help of Thor (of course) it seemed like things were only getting positive from there. With the way he rendered lightning, destroying things into dust, you were ready to end this once and for all.

And when a cloud of grey smoke appeared out of thin air, and a large titanian appeared. You knew this would either be the ending or the beginning of all these troubles.

“That’s him” you falter, turning to Steve. You give him a quick once over, nothing the way he eyed your father. A menacing, scary look on his face and the furrow of his eyebrows only grow.

“We have eyes on Thanos” he says into the intercom.

It’s like time stands still for a few seconds, no one moves a muscle. You haven't seen this man in years. You feel as if he doesn't recognize who you are as he glances over everyone, like they're roaches in his kitchen.

Yet, in a blur, everyone takes their chance on Thanos. Trying their hardest to somehow, someway take this Titanian down. Bruce gets thrown with a shout, Branches entwine Nat, and Sam drops from the air smoothly.

At some point you hear the grunt of Steve, who somehow gets some punches in, his hands clutching the gauntlet. He shouts from the hefty weight and in a swift motion is stock-still on the ground from the punch he endures.

“Steve!”

Without a choice you run towards Thanos, your adrenaline kicking in. Kicking in punching only to use your hands to grasp around the metal. You knew towards the end; you were no match for him.

“Please! Please don’t do this. Dad please I’m begging you” you plead profusely, but he only looks down at you emotionless. “Please, please, please” you cry, your head hangs low for a bit before you raise it up again. “This won’t fix anything! You–– you…JUST TAKE IT OFF” you scream, knuckles colliding with the gold.

You try so hard to think of anything to turn his mind, but he only looks at you like a stranger. Not the little girl he recruited and used to look at with some kind of affection. His type of affection, if you could even title it that, affection.

Sure, he raised you to be a ruthless killer and thief, but you’d do anything in this key moment to change his crooked mind.

“You don’t get to call me that again. You chose your path...I always knew you’d be the one to let me down the most” he says all this with so much venom.

You cry as you're lifted in the air, by his gauntlet hand, and thrown against the bark of a tree.

You're in a daze. The only things securing you back is the hand against your cheek and a booming, choked up "no". Hearing it a distance away.

You open your eyes to see Steve in front of you, your name on his lips almost incessantly. But when you open them, your eyes quickly move to Thor. Who’s a few feet away from the two of you, shocked and angry. The remnant of smoke in the air. You knew he did it.

“We lost?” you ask Steve, tears already forming in your eyes, as he carefully lifts you to his feet.

He doesn’t get the chance to answer you, though.

“Steve…?” It’s Bucky, You both look towards him to see him fall slowly, disappearing into a brown dust.

You both look on, shocked all while Steve tries to drag himself and your weak body to Bucky. But it’s already too late.

“Buck?!” Steve calls out, but there’s no answer.

You watch on in disorder, stomach plummeting with every second that pasts. Your eyes catch Wanda looking onto Vision's body in sorrow and as you do, she turns into brown dust. It was frightening and you were speechless. So much happening around you, you weren’t sure where to look. You weren’t who was going away.

The hand against your spine, holding you up, starts to feel faint and a headache you had suffered from earlier comes back, but ten times stronger.

“My head hurts” you tell him, your words come out slowly as your mouth starts to feel numb. You drop your head to his shoulder. “Stevie...I can’t feel your hands” you blubber, chest heaving as your breathing picks up. Everything was happening so, so fast.

He lifts your head, “Hey, you’re alright sweetheart, you took a hard hit. Just a bit banged up, gotta stay awake in case it’s a concussion” he reassures you.

You don’t believe him and when you look down at your right hand to see it crumbling away little by little. You lift your wrist up, hand gone. You look down to see the brown dust below your view.

You didn’t want to go. You had merely planned your dream future with him. It wasn’t fair your father would be the one to rip that away from you.

“No. No, you’re alright, stop that” he condemns, bringing your other hand to his bruised lips imperatively. Watching as it climbs up and up, half of your shoulder already gone.

“I’m scared. I love you so much Steve”

“I love you so much doll, feel like we’ve been saying it all day” he tries to joke, eyes roaming all over your face. He had to make sure he had your face recognized to a t, even if it was in a manner of pain.

And you do the same. You weren’t sure where you were going. Were you even dying?! You couldn’t tell, all you knew was Steve and some of your friends wouldn’t be where you were going.

You laugh despondently, low, and mirthlessly knowing how much he needed that laugh at the moment.

“No. I’m gonna––” you start, but never get to finish, because at that moment. In a flash, he’s left with the sight of the soot falling in a sway, like leaves tumbling to the ground. Staring at him gloved palms to see nothing of you there any longer.

He does nothing but stand there for a few minutes, recollecting the exchange. Not only was his best friend gone, but so was his best girl.

He had one fucking job. Keep you safe at all times. Not only did he let the whole universe down, he let you down. You were gone. He can only think about the moment you both had on the jet, telling you, you had nothing to worry about. Because you guys were going to win and now she is gone. He let you down in the worst possible way imaginable. You were gone…

He repeats this to himself, losing hope each time that you would be back in just a second.

He turns around to see his friends observing him and once he notices that Sam is no longer among the group it only increases his agony.

“Cap?” Nat mumbles.

“FUCK!” he breaks. Ripping the gloves off his hand before he sets himself against the ground–– his body feeling heavy. His head is in his hand, body heaving roughly as he cries quietly.

Everyone is stunned and takes a step back to give his face, not remembering the last time they’ve seen him this broken or the last he’s had an outburst resulting in a curse word.

He isn’t sure how he’s supposed to live with this guilt or without you by his side. In spite of that, there was no way in hell he wasn’t going to try and find a way to bring you back.

– – – –

realized while writing thing i am not creative...this (beginning) was literally a scene

if you enjoyed pls don’t forget to reblog or give feedback if ur up to it <3

#steve rogers #steve rogers x reader #avengers fanfiction #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers x fem!reader #steve rogers fluff #steve rogers angst #steve rogers x you #chris evans x reader #marvel fanfiction #captain america x reader #captain america #captain america fanfiction #steve rogers oneshot #steve rogers x female reader #steve rogers x avenger reader

403 notes · View notes

alwaysmarveling · 3 years

Text

When You Try Your Best but You Don’t Succeed...

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

Warnings: Mentions of death

Word Count: 2k

Summary: When your mission goes wrong, Nat’s there to help

“What’s up, Rogers? How’s my girl?” Nat smirked, talking to her friend and coworker through the phone. The heavy sigh she heard on the other end caused her face to drop and her spine to straighten.

“We’re coming back, Nat.”

“Is everything okay? You weren’t supposed to be coming back for another week. Is Y/N okay? Is she hurt?”

“Physically, she’s fine. Just the normal cuts and bruises. Mentally… Nat, there were kids.”

“How many?” Natasha asked, her voice now unreadable.

“Ten. Eight of them made it, but… we couldn’t get to the last two. She tried, but the damage to the building was bad, and… she tried. I had to physically pull her out before she could get herself killed.” Natasha’s arm trembled slightly as she lowered herself down on the sofa in her room, listening carefully to every word coming through the phone’s speaker.

“When will you guys be back?”

“We’ll be back in about an hour. I think Y/N’s sleeping right now, but I’m not sure.”

“Okay,” the redhead nodded. “Thanks for letting me know. Steve,” Natasha paused, “how are you doing?”

“I’ll be okay. It hit her the hardest.” The woman nodded to no one in particular as she played with the end of her hair, her glance not quite meeting the floor.

“Alright. Take care of yourself.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Steve teased. Natasha smirked as she hung up before returning her thoughts to your predicament. Your relationship with the spy was relatively new. The two of you had been together for just about three months now. Before that, you had been close friends, but emotions had never really been a huge part of your relationship. Nat knew you needed her now, though, and she’d do her best to be there for you.

---

“Hi, Steve.” Nat waved at the super soldier as he entered the compound’s living room. Steve gave her a small smile before retreating to his own room to freshen up.

“Hey, ba...” She took in your weary, blood-covered form, the smile she had put on for Steve quickly vanishing. Steve had told her you weren’t hurt, but she was not expecting you to be that bloody or that dirty.

“I’m fine, Nat,” you reassured her, giving her a weak smile. By the time you had finished speaking, she was already there, holding your hands.

“You don’t look fine,” she murmured, brushing a hand over your face before stopping to cup your cheek.

“One shower and I’ll be as good as new,” you tried again, your voice cracking on the last word. “I should go,” you whispered, dropping her hands and rushing out of the room before she could stop you.

---

“Y/N?” Natasha knocked at the door tentatively. “Are you okay?” You sniffed, wiping the tears that were making their way down your face.

“I’m fine,” you called out, turning off the water. How long had you been in the shower for?

“I, uh, I got dinner ready. If you’re hungry.”

“Sounds good, I’ll be out in 5 minutes,” you replied, towelling yourself off. You wanted nothing more than to stay in bed for the rest of the night, but your shower had already been suspiciously long, and you needed to prove to Natasha that you were okay. Well, you needed to make Natasha think that you were okay.

It wasn’t that you didn’t trust Natasha. You were just very aware of how new your relationship was. An invisible force was pushing—or more like shoving—you to let her hold you in her arms and tell you that everything would be okay, but you didn’t want to overstep any boundaries in your relationship. Taking a deep breath, you threw on a light t-shirt and shorts before meeting Natasha in the kitchen.

“Hey, I made your favorite,” Natasha announced as you padded into the room.

“Thanks, you’re the best.” You winced slightly at your response, not sounding quite as convincing as you would’ve liked.

“You sure you’re okay?” Natasha asked gently. You didn’t know about the phone call she’d had with Steve, and she wanted to give you the chance to tell her yourself.

“I’m fine. The mission was just tiring.” Natasha rubbed your arm comfortingly.

“I’m sorry. Maybe we can just watch a movie tonight and cuddle?”

“Nat, I...” you didn’t know how to tell her that you wanted to be alone without sounding off; you never said no to cuddling with her. She tilted her head slightly when you didn’t continue. “Yeah,” you sighed, “that sounds great,” you agreed, spooning some of the food into your mouth.

“I’m glad you came back early, love. I missed-” You dropped the spoon at her first sentence.

“I’m sorry, I can’t do this, Nat.”

“Babe, wait-” You didn’t turn around as you fled the room, not wanting her to see the tears that were streaming down your face.

---

“Y/N,” Natasha sighed. “Please let me in.” Natasha had waited 15 minutes before following you to your room. She put away the food she was sure you’d be asking for later, threw on some pajamas, took two bottles of water from the kitchen, and grabbed her laptop and one of the oversized sweatshirts in her closet for you. All she needed was for you to let her in.

“I’m sorry, Nat, I- I’m really tired, and I think I’m just going to go to bed,” you called through the door. You mentally smacked your forehead at how unconvincing that sounded, your sniffles obviously heard through the door.

“Y/N, please,” she responded softly. “We don’t even have to talk, just… please, let me in?” You sighed, wiping your eyes and smoothing back your hair, trying to make yourself at least a little more presentable. Since she was definitely aware that you were upset, the least you could do was not show her just how upset you were. But when you slowly opened the door and met Natasha’s worried gaze, you couldn’t help but break down. “It’s okay,” she murmured, closing the door softly behind her and wrapping her arms tightly around you. “I got you.” The two of you stayed like that for a while as you just enjoyed the feeling of being in her arms. Her scent and warmth kept you grounded, reminders of all the beauty in the world when you could only see the ugly. When your sobs quieted down, Natasha pushed you away slightly to get a good look at your face.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” she asked softly.

“I- I don’t know,” you hiccuped. Your throat was dry and your voice cracked, but you weren’t focused on that. Nat was, though.

“That’s okay,” Natasha reassured you, squeezing your shoulders. “Here, put this on. And drink some water, okay? And I brought my laptop so we can watch your favorite movie.” You couldn’t tell if your heart warmed or sunk at her actions, and you stared at the sweatshirt and water bottle that she offered you. “Y/N?”

“I don’t deserve this,” you whispered, tears filling your eyes yet again. The redhead sighed, placing her things on the bed before taking your hands up in hers. She pressed her forehead against yours, forcing your eyes to meet her emerald orbs.

“Sweetheart, please listen to me. I know that you want to save everyone, we all do. None of us would be here if we didn’t. But the reality is that we can’t. No matter how perfect we are, how trained we are, or what powers we may or may not have, there’s always going to be people that we can’t save. We’ve known each other for quite some time, yeah?” You nodded slowly, still not meeting her eyes. “Then trust me when I tell you that you deserve this. Hell, you deserve so much more than this. You put 110% into everything that you do, and nobody doubts that for even a second. I wish everything that you did would work out perfectly, but it can’t. You have to forgive yourself for this. Please, believe me, love.” You didn’t respond for a moment, taking the time to wrangle up the billions of thoughts swirled around your head but vanished the second you tried to focus on any of them.

“They were kids, Nat. I tried so hard, I-” At that, you began to sob once more and allowed Natasha to pull you into her.

“I know,” your girlfriend shushed you, her heart breaking at the cracks in your voice. “You always try your hardest, and that’s something I admire so much about you. But listen to me. You saved eight of those kids. Because of you, that’s eight little girls and boys who get to go back home to their families and grow up to become amazing adults. You may feel like you failed now, but without you, none of those kids would get that opportunity. Not one of them. Okay?”

“Okay,” you said softly. “Thank you,” you mumbled, giving her one last squeeze before you let her go.

“You’re welcome,” your girlfriend smiled. “Now, put this on,” Natasha ordered, throwing the sweatshirt at you. When you cocked your head to the side, she smirked. “You didn’t think I was leaving you alone, did you? I said we were going to snuggle and watch a movie, and I meant it. Unless you don’t want to.” The crinkles around the corners of her eyes began to recede, her smirk faltering.

“I’d love to,” you responded, giving her a peck on the cheek. “You’re very sweet,” you complimented her as the two of you climbed into your bed.

“Only for you,” she whispered, winking at you. The spy pulled you in close to her side, pressing her lips to the top of your head before pulling the blankets tightly over the both of you. “That’s a nice goose egg you’ve got there,” she murmured, referencing the growing lump on your head. “Do you want me to get some ice for it?”

“I’m fine, Nat. Everything’s just superficial.” Natasha hummed, running her fingers gently over it.

“If you say so,” she said reluctantly. “I guess you’re still somewhat attractive with it.”

“Hey!” You smacked her across the stomach. “You’re supposed to be supportive.”

“I’m just kidding, babe. Very attractive. Makes you look less like a dork and more like a badass.”

“Oh, shut up and watch the movie,” you grumbled, pushing yourself further into your girlfriend’s torso.

“Nat?” you spoke up, the movie now halfway over.

“Yeah, hon?”

“Steve told you about the mission, didn’t he?” The redhead pulled her eyes away from the screen to look at you.

“Yeah, he did. Is that okay?” Her voice was steady, but her face was unsure and vulnerable. You paused, considering your answer.

“Yeah, I guess it is,” you finally responded. “Although I need to tell that old man to get his wrinkly ass out of my business,” you said, your lips curving up slightly at the corners.

“He’s just looking out for you, babe. He loves you,” she teased, squeezing your cheek. The two of you fell silent for a moment, neither of you really paying attention to the various images flashing across the screen.

“Do you?” you asked softly, looking into Natasha’s green eyes.

“Always,” she whispered, leaning down to meet your lips.

“I love you, too,” you giggled, breaking the kiss.

“I love you more, you dork.”

“I thought I was a badass!” you whined, turning away as Natasha pecked your lips again.

“Mm, you are. My badass.” The two of you smiled at that, and you pulled Natasha’s head down to meet you in another kiss. The pain of losing those two kids was still there, and it would take some time before you were able to truly forgive yourself, but having Natasha with you made things a little bit easier.

#natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x fem!reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff #avengers x reader #marvel #mcu #I wrote something #alwaysmarveling

295 notes · View notes

looooooooomis · 4 years

Text

F I N A L G I R L | F O U R

You were his final girl. And there was no chance in hell that anyone or anything was going to mess that up.

p a r t f o u r | k e y s

masterlist here

pairing: Billy Loomis x f!reader word count: 4.4k warnings: angst, s m u t, some more s m u t, teasing, finger-licking good billy boy, implied/referenced cheating, def not a healthy, functioning relationship (but like eh we persevere), some more s m u t.

Despite your best efforts, the last few days had been miserable without Billy.

You hadn’t realized just how much of a routine he’d become over the last seven months, how much you’d both come to rely on each other and, fuck, did you miss him. You missed his smell, you missed that small little cheeky grin of his, you missed curling up beside him and feeling him over every inch of your skin. Your body craved for him in an almost primal way but, while you could live with denying your body its needs, it was your heart that hurt the most.

What was supposed to be a quick release for the two of you had never been that easy. You’d been in love with the idiot since freshman year, seen him through his various ups and downs and he’d seen yours, too. Which was precisely what made this entire situation that much harder. Not only were you dealing with your own heartache, but you were witnessing his, too.

Billy’s grief was more or less a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it sort of thing. Ever the stoic silent type, you hadn’t expected to see much of what he was feeling splayed out on that handsome face of his, but shocking even you, his regret was palpable. And each and every time those brown eyes met yours, that grief that was as clear as day struck you blind.

You’d tried telling yourself that it was for the best because, in all honesty, it was but that didn’t make the pain go away. Nor did it make you miss him any less. You were trapped in a vicious cycle of missing Billy, sticking to your guns, and worrying about him all at once.

God, you’d really fucked up with this one.

“You sure you’re okay?” Tatum asked, narrowing her eyes at you as you shoved a handful of books into your locker. “You’ve been scatterbrained all week.”

“I’m fine,” you shrugged, “why wouldn’t I be?”

“You tell me,” she leaned her hip against the locker. “Is this about Steve?”

You blinked as the question played on loop in your head. “Steve?” You asked, giving the strawberry blonde your full attention. “First of all, and I mean this from the bottom of my heart: ew. Secondly, huh?”

Tatum smirked. “Don’t play dumb, you’ve been acting all weird since Billy went psycho on his ass last week.”

“No, I haven’t,” you hoped your laugh didn’t sound as fake as it felt. “Also, Steve’s an asshole. If the day ever comes when I am interested in that big oaf, feel free to euthanize me.”

“Promise,” she made a motion of crossing her heart, “but in the meantime, you swear nothing is up?”

“Cross my heart,” you mimicked the gesture and shut your locker. “What are you up to after practice tonight? Want to go see that new Brad Pitt movie?”

Her shoulders fell. “Can’t, Stu’s coming over,” she unwrapped a lollipop and shoved it in her mouth. “I’d say ask Sid, but she got into it with Billy last night so she’s in a mood.”

You tried not to care, you really did, but her words hit you like a freight train. “They did?” You asked, hoping beyond hope that your voice didn’t sound quite as high pitched as it sounded in your head. “What happened?”

“Who knows,” Tatum shrugged, “Billy’s always been a little intense and Sid’s been a little cagey since…well, you know – so, it’s bound to happen.”

You swallowed hard and continued to nod along to Tatum’s words. Were you nodding too frequently? Did you appear too interested all of the sudden? Catching yourself, you focused on the leftover gum on the locker just behind your friend’s head and cleared your throat. “That’s shitty.”

“Relationships,” Tatum waved off, “they’re all pretty shitty sometimes.”

Before you could finish putting your foot in your mouth any further, the third bell rang out signaling your next class. Your most dreaded class: Biology. With a groan you tossed your bag over your shoulder and frowned across at Tatum. “See you at practice?”

With a nod, Tatum took off towards her class as you slowly sauntered towards your own. You were halfway down the hall when you heard a set of heavy footfalls running towards you from behind. Glancing over your shoulder, you barely had time to register Stu’s smiling face before he threw an arm around your shoulders. “How ya doing, pal?”

“Peachy,” you scraped your eyes along his profile and blinked. “If you’re about to play the rule of dutiful henchman for you know who, I’ve got a class to flunk.”

“Harsh,” Stu beamed, “I see why our boy’s so smitten.”

With a roll of your eyes, you glanced around at the people around you and glowered up at him. “Stu,” you warned, “I’m not in the mood for this.”

“For what?” He feigned innocence. “I haven’t said a word.”

“But you want to,” you mused. “And I don’t want to hear it.”

Stu chuckled. “All I was going to say is, like, I get it.”

You shouldn’t have taken his bait. What you should have done was push him off of you and continue on your merry way to class. That would have been the smart thing to do, the responsible thing to do.

Too bad you were neither of those two things.

Roped in, you sighed in defeat. “Get what?”

“I’ll be the first to admit,” he began, “when Bill told me that you and him were…you know, I laughed. I mean, two broads, man? I can barely handle the one how’s he going to deal with two of you?”

“I’m hoping there’s a point coming,” you groused.

“Right,” he laughed again, “my point is that I get it. I get why you two work. Why he’s knee deep in this big fucking mess because of it. You two work.”

“Stu,” you threw your head back and glared at the ceiling. “Stop.”

“What?” He asked. “Am I wrong?”

You gently pushed him away from you and dropped your voice into a whisper. “That’s not the point. He’s with Sid.”

“So?” Stu made a face. “Her mom just died, what do you want him to do? Dump her and break her heart? Her mom just died, that’d callous, man.”

“We’re breaking her heart either way, whether she knows it or not.”

Stu stopped walking and there was a compassion in his stare that left you reeling. For as long as you’d known him, Stu Macher had always been the goof. The reckless, chaotic idiot that seemed to fit just perfectly into your little mish mash of a group. But the sincerity in his blue eyes as the two of you stood in the emptying hallway was a look you’d never seen before.

“And by doing this, you’re breaking yours.” He limply shrugged. “Billy’s, too.”

Your shoulders fell as the weight of Stu’s words sank in. You couldn’t exactly say much in terms of a rebuttal, naturally, because he was right. There were no happy endings for either of you at this point in the charade. Sid had still been lied to and cheated on, Billy was still trapped in a relationship he no longer wished to be in in fear of hurting the girl he once loved and you were stuck in the middle, watching two people you cared for fall to bits while having to remain stoic in fear of showing your hand.

What a fucking mess.

After another minute of silence, Stu wriggled his eyebrows and squeezed your shoulder reassuringly. “Just something to think about.”

Taking off down the hall, Stu left you to your own devices as you stood in the middle of an empty hallway with far too much on your mind. In an almost zombie-like trance, you took off in the direction of your biology class, not quite caring that you were about to be marked as tardy for the third time that week. But, before you got to that god-forsaken class, you heard the click of a door not far off before a pair of arms encircled around your middle, yanking you into the nearest classroom. A surprise yelp tore out of your mouth, but the full-fledged scream died in your throat as soon as you realized just who it was who had grabbed you.

“Jesus, Billy, you scared the hell out of me.” You grasped your chest and took in the dark, empty classroom around you. He was still holding you against the nearest wall, you could feel the heat of those large hands through your thin shirt. “What the fuck are you doing?”

“Sorry,” despite the desperation in those brown eyes, his voice never wavered. It was still as calm and collected as ever. “I’d go to your house, but it’s been like Fort Knox for the last week or so.”

You chewed on your lip for a moment before averting your eyes to the ground, not quite being able to stomach the weight of his stare just yet. “Billy, unless anything’s changed, I—”

“In case anything’s changed?” He reiterated with raised brows. “Everything’s changed. I miss you, Y/N, more than you can even comprehend. I know I’ve fucked up, I know that, but I need you. The last nine days without being able to really see you or feel you or kiss you or—”

“I get it,” you held your hands up and gently pushed him away. “And it’s been hard on me, too, Billy. But it doesn’t change anything.”

For a few, long, agonizing moments, Billy remained still as a thousand different emotions splayed out across his face. There was anger and grief, sadness and desperation. But the look you got as he dropped to his knees in front of you was pure, unadulterated fear. “I promise you, Y/N, the second I can, when the time is right, Sid and I will be no more. But me and you are it, sweetheart,” his hands gently circled around your hips before embracing you around your middle. “I’m so fucking sorry that this is how it has to be right now. And I’m sorry that I’m too fucking selfish to let this go, but I can’t. I need you. I need us. You’re everything good in my life and I know I need to start proving that to you.”

Still, you remained quiet. Your fingers itched to reach out and run your fingers through that slightly greasy, unruly mop of hair, but instead you kept them pinned down at your side as you considered his words. There was no doubt in your mind that he meant them, the desperation on his face said as much, but you had your reservations. Taking your silence in stride, however, Billy simply reached into his pocket and pulled out a small, velvet box.

Your heart nearly stopped.

“Oh, jesus,” you grumbled, burying your head in your hands. “You better not be doing what I think you’re fucking doing.”

“Open the box, Y/N.”

“No,” you held your hands up. “Not if it’s…that.”

Billy sighed. The muscle in his cheek twitched. “It’s not a fucking engagement ring.”

Somewhat relieved, you continued to stare down at the box in slight disdain. “So, what is it?”

Billy sighed. “Fucking open it and you’ll see.”

“Buying the ‘other woman’ jewelry, Billy?” You shook your head. “You’re like a walking cliché at this point.”

“Shut-up and open the goddamn box.” Standing up to his full height, he continued to hold the box out towards you and breathed out a quiet laugh when you remained unwavering. “It’s not a fucking bomb, Y/N, open it.”

With a sigh, you snatched the box out of his hand and, rather unceremoniously, opened it up to reveal a key. Not a fancy skeleton key or a charm in the shape of a key but a regular, run of the mill house key. You blinked, mildly surprised. “Okay, I’ll give you a point for creativity with the box,” you pulled the key out and observed it. “But what is it?”

“It’s a key,” Billy said, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

“I see that,” a small smile pulled at your lips as you looked across at him. “What’s it for?”

“It’s a key to my parents’ cabin.”

If you were meant to understand the significance, the story was lost on you. Looking back down at the key, you surveyed its tiny ridges briefly before nodding. “And what’s that have to do with me?”

He took a step towards you and grabbed the hand still clutching onto the key. “My dad doesn’t go up there much ever since my mother left and I figure we could both use a place where we can just…be.” His raked his thumbnail along your knuckles. “No Sid, no anyone. Just you and me.”

You were trying to remain unfazed by the sentiment, to remain icy and cool to the man you were supposed to be pulling away from, but between the softness in those warm brown eyes and the weight of the key still clutched in your hand, you could feel your defenses waning. “You expect Sid to just not care that you’re disappearing up north every once in a while?”

“I’ll make it work,” he shrugged it off. “And, to be honest, I don’t care what she thinks.”

Your answer came in the form of a long, drawn out sigh. “Billy,” you began, but before you could dive into the rest of your speech, his large hands slid up your arms and neck to cradle your face.

Slowly, he backed you into a nearby desk and traced the apple of your cheek with his thumb. “We can sneak up there whenever we want. Spend a whole weekend up there, just the two of us. I can worship this fucking body of yours in every square inch of that cabin. I can go into town and hold your fucking hand in public. We can do whatever the hell it is we want to do up there, whenever we want, without worrying about any of our idiot friends seeing us.”

Your pulse quickened at the thought of being able to parade around like a normal couple in a town where not a single soul knew who you were. You swallowed, trying to steady your excitement with a dose of realism. “It’s still not fair to Sidney.”

“Fuck Sidney!” Billy’s voice echoed out around the vast, empty classroom, alarming you with just how angry he sounded. His chest heaved with a white-hot rage that you couldn’t fully comprehend, and his jaw was wound shut as his nostrils flared with each and every heavy, uneven breath he took. You swallowed hard and watched the man steady his nerves, unsure of your next move. You’d seen Billy angry before, but that level of emotion was definitely new.

You weren’t sure whether to be terrified or turned on by the sudden outburst.

But, just as quickly as it happened, Billy’s eyes slowly opened to reveal those molasses coloured eyes again. “Sorry, sweetheart,” he appeased. “But I can’t have her stand in the way of this. I won’t.”

You remained silent as you shimmied on top of the desk that had been poking into your ass for the last few seconds and tried not to focus on the way your body seemed to melt into Billy’s as he stepped in between your legs, still looking at you with all the intensity of the world.

“If we do this,” you found yourself muttering, “there’s going to be some ground rules.”

A sense of hope blossomed in Billy’s chest as he vigorously nodded his head. “Anything you want,” sliding his hands up the sides your stomach, he gently held your waist and gave it a small squeeze. “You name it.”

“When we go up to the aforementioned cabin, we go out.” You told him. “While I’m more than happy to blow you in the living room without worrying about your dad walking in, it would be nice to go on an actual fucking date.”

Billy nodded and, with his hands still on your waist, he tried not to focus on the thin cotton of your shirt bunching between his fingers as his thumb danced along your ribcage. There was so little between you in the empty classroom, barely any space as the two of you were practically nose to nose. And between that short little skirt you had on and your pert nipples beneath your thin tank top, it was enough to make his cock twitch inside of his pants. “Anything else?” He asked, his voice husky as he nudged his nose against yours.

“Yeah,” you ran your tongue along your now parched lips as you sat with Billy standing between your thighs, holding you in place as his thumb traced agonizingly close to your tit. Were you even breathing? It didn’t feel like it. You were wet, too, which made his inhumanly close proximity almost too much to bear. “Lock the fucking door this time.”

A roguish grin enveloped his features as he stepped out from between your legs. Crossing the threshold of the classroom in two seconds flat, Billy locked the door and made his way back to you with that same mischievous glimmer in his eye. His eyes were hungry and, as his hands shifted down to your ass, he tugged you even closer to the edge of the desk. Closer to him. With your legs still open and on either side of his hips, you just about died when your clit managed to rub against the zipper of his jeans.

A quiet, low moan tore out of your throat from the sensation.

“Anything else?” He asked, leaning his forehead against yours.

“Yeah,” your breathing was ragged as Billy’s slow, methodical fingers, trailed up the side of your stomach. He was being extraordinarily temperate and slow to further tease you but, despite knowing how risky this was, you were putty in his hands. “Touch me.”

His nose brushed against yours again as he shifted his hips just enough for the zipper of his jeans to rub against your clit again. The bastard knew what he was doing.

“This feel good?” He asked as his hips toiled into you again.

You were practically dry fucking against the desk, you could have been caught any second. But, fuck, when he pulled you in a little more and slowly gyrated his jean-clad pelvis against your clit again, you couldn’t care less. “Mhmm,” you hummed.

Slowly, Billy’s dept fingers slid up from your waist towards your breasts. Raking his thumb against the swollen bud, he leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on the side of your neck.

He knew his jeans were rubbing against your clit and, as he looked down and saw the visible wet patch on your blue thong, he wanted nothing more than to rip them off of you and bury his face in between your legs. “God, I’ve fucking missed you.”

When his hand squeezed your breast, you arched into his grasp. “I bet you did.”

Billy smirked and rolled your nipples between his fingers through the fabric of your shirt. With every roll of your hips, the strap of your shirt slipped down just enough to expose your breast. Without missing a beat, Billy leaned into your chest and allowed his mouth to consume your nipple, swirling his tongue around it expertly before biting down. You hissed as a combination of both pain and pleasure ripped through your body.

Your fingers curled around the hair along the nape of his neck and gave it a firm tug as is hands held you firmly in place. “Fuck, Billy” you moaned, breathless.

He released your nipple slowly, nipping at it one final time before leaning his forehead against yours again. You wanted like hell to close the distance between you. You wanted to feel his lips on yours. Feel the tickle of his stubble along your upper lip and have that expert tongue brush against yours.

But you also wanted to make him sweat a little.

You weren’t sure what had come over you as you slid your hand down your torso. Maybe it was adrenaline of being caught or the relief of having Billy in your arms again but as you allowed your fingers to dip beneath the hem of your exposed thong, the look on Billy’s face made it all worth it.

“What are you doing?” His Adams apple bobbed up and down as he watched you touch yourself. You were in an awkward angle, but as your finger circled your clit and you watched the bulge in his pants grow, you were coasting high.

“What’s it look like I’m doing?” You hummed, feigning innocence. “When I say touch me, I mean it, Billy. I’m taking matters into my own hands.” You pinched your clit and arched your naked chest into him. “Fuck.”

You heard him swear under his breath as his lips ghosted over yours. “You’re doing my head in, woman,” he growled, sliding his fingers beneath your panties. You gasped when his thumb began to circle your clit. And when he slid two fingers inside of you, you nearly saw stars.

His mouth found yours, mid-moan. Reaching the hand that had just been down the waistband of your shorts, you ran your fingers through his hair as his tongue coaxed yours. Everything about this man was electric. His fingers quickened their pace and before you knew it, you were thrusting into his hand. Placing sloppy kisses down from your mouth and along your jaw, Billy nipped at your ear. “How’s this for touching you, sweetheart?” He hissed, licking and biting his way across your neck.

Your breathing was rampant as you felt yourself edging closer and closer. “It’s alright,” you teased with a cloudy grin.

“So stubborn,” he laughed into your neck and curled his fingers so that he hit an area inside you that felt almost primal. The moan he got in return made him bite down on your collarbone. He curled his fingers again and you nearly choked. “You sure?”

Pulling his hair, you steered his face back to yours and crashed your lips against his. “Fuck me.” You mumbled into his mouth.

He applied the smallest bit of pressure to your clit and flicked his fingers one final time, sending you over the cliff. With a long, shaky moan, you bucked your hips uncontrollably as you came into his hand. Every inch of you felt as though it was on fire as Billy made you ride out your orgasm, not for a second easing up on your clit as you writhed beneath him.

“Play with your tits,” he barked out through hooded eyes.

“You play with them,” you argued, but the resolve in your voice was gone. You weren’t entirely sure if you knew your name at that point. All you could focus on was the feeling of his finger pinching your highly sensitive clit and that was it. Everything else was a blur.

“God, you’re so fucking stubborn.”

You were so wet and so turned on you could barely think straight. “Billy,” you pleaded, your entire body heating up almost unbearably so. When he ignored you and instead continued his attack on your clit, you whimpered. “I need you to fuck me.”

With a bruising kiss, Billy released your clit and, in seconds flat, tugged his jeans far enough down his hips before slipping inside of you. The moan that escaped your lips was undeniable as he pumped into you. Reaching up, he grabbed your tit and squeezed as he bit down on your exposed neck. It was a sensory overload coming from all angles.

“Fuck,” Billy’s hoarse voice was in your ear as he pumped into you. “You feel so fucking good, Y/N.” He reached for your face and tilted your chin up towards him, meeting you halfway with a sloppy kiss. Moaning into his mouth, you managed lose yourself in that instance.

Gone was the room around you.

Hell, gone was everything up until this point.

All you could focus on was the feeling of Billy inside of you. Biting down on his lip, you tugged it back as he rolled his hips in a way that made you quiver. He was thrusting, hard, in an almost animalistic that made your entire body shake with the velocity of every desperate push. He moved between kissing your lips, to biting them to suckling your neck as he continued to rail into you with all of passion in the world. He was a man, unhinged, and you weren’t sure if you’d ever seen him so sexy.

Not surprising in the least, it didn’t take him long to come. You’d riled him up to the point of no return and, as you felt him come inside of you, you all but laughed when his forehead dramatically fell against your own.

For a few minutes, neither of you moved, simply just remained still and firmly pressed against one another. But, as the weight of your current whereabouts slowly dawned on either of you, you both slowly pulled away from each other, both wearing a small smile as you re-dressed yourselves.

Once his pants were done up, Billy stepped into you once again and placed a kiss on your forehead. “Cabin this weekend, okay?”

You nodded and hopped down from the desk. “Yeah, maybe,” you teased, fixing your skirt.

Billy’s eyebrows rose. “Oh, maybe, eh?”

“Yeah,” you winked, “I’ll think about it.”

“Smart ass,” Billy smirked. “That mouth of yours is going to get you in trouble one of these days.”

“I’m counting on it.” Once you were both fixed up, you nodded towards his hand which was still slicked with your juices. You laughed. “Oops.”

But Billy didn’t seem fazed. Instead, your breath hitched in your throat when he raised his hand to his lips and licked your slick clear off, relishing in the taste of it with a knowing smirk on his face. “This weekend.” He reiterated, driving the point home.

“This weekend,” you agreed, walking towards the door. Ensuring nobody saw the two of you leave an empty classroom together, you unlocked the door and gave Billy a small, knowing smile. “See you at lunch, lover boy.”

1K notes · View notes