#THANK YOU for asking about Ciaran again! always!

[ex-textura]

Any headcanons for Ciaran's time in the cult(s)?

and/or

How has Ciaran changed now that he has his freedom? 💜

SO MANY. So many. You know there's gonna be a cut, you know me. It's been a while and there be rambling ahead.

Also uh...Canon typical durge grossness ahead.

The Ciaran from before (before Orin's attack, before the worm) was such a different person. It took some time for Sceleritas to break him down when the urge had first awakened and he fought then much as he fought after waking on the nautiloid but little Ciaran didn't have friends and loved ones who supported him to keep him fighting like this new Ciaran did. He'd already killed them all. So eventually he broke down to the dreams and the horrors and once the fighting stopped and the walls came down a whole new monster was born.

Ciaran Finch (he named himself that. Can't remember the name his adoptive parents used so long ago. Dark Little Songbird, for the way he made his victims sing) loved the cult, he loved the murder, he loved the blood and the screams and the power. He loved the way people cowered at his feet and the way they prayed to him, for power, for forgiveness, for death.

He was also a flirt, but in the worst ways. He knew what he looked like, was in fact incredibly vain, knew he could take what he wanted but he found pleasure in letting people think they had a choice (if they said yes, he'd sleep with them then kill them. If they said no...the reverse). He was...truly awful.

Sometimes Bhaal's hold on him would weaken and he'd find himself scared, or feeling compassion. Once or twice he'd let someone go without hurting them and could never understand why. Of course he'd be punished for it after and Scleritas would have to scold him and set him back on the 'right path', but those instances were rare.

He was sleeping with Gortash. He liked to dominate the little tyrant. He'd hurt him and laugh when he came back for more. He didn't love him, but he was interested in him and that was the closest anyone had ever gotten. So he kept him around.

Scleritas came to him about 60 years ago. It only took a couple of years to really break him. He'd been fully indoctrinated ever since. There were a great many years of brutal murder in between meeting Scleritas and meeting the tadpole gang.

---

Ciaran now... is different. Not just from the monster he was, but even from the broken man he'd become. He's almost childlike now, in his wonder, and the way he's exploring his world as though he'd never seen it before. He sleeps. He sleeps SO MUCH. And he snores. And drools. Any opportunity he can get to curl up somewhere soft, he does. If it's with his head on Gale's lap, all the better. He's started drinking with the others now, too. He'd held off on anything that might put him to sleep or impair his ability to fight the voice but once it was gone and he was free from the burden, he's let himself loose. He doesn't drink much, certainly not to excess, but he also has next to no tolerance anymore so it doesn't take much to give him that warm, giddy feeling.

He finds he likes wine, but he prefers the lighter varieties. Ale makes him gassy, and disturbs his sleep so he avoids that.

He talks more, now. His chattiness from his old days is starting to come back to him but now rather than boasting and taunting he just...rambles. He makes dorky jokes that only he laughs awkwardly at. He gives compliments freely and hugs openly. He's still shy though, its all so new. So when he catches himself going on a tangent he blushes and shuts himself up, or deflects to take the focus off himself (still doesn't like being the center of attention. That's something he hasn't gotten back from his old days and probably never will).

Mostly, though, I think the biggest change is...he's happy. Sure the world might be ending and it's still his fault and it's still his responsibility to fix it but Gale is there, their rift mended. He's got his best friends at his side. People love him and he loves them. They have a dog and a cat and an owlbear and a HAMSTER! And his dreams are sweet. and his heart is full. He's just. Happy.

[misc-obeyme]

Apparently I only do monthly status updates now. Remember when it was like once a week? Yeah, it was a brief moment so I'm probably the only one who does lol.

First I would like to say a huge THANK YOU to everyone who sent in questions about my MC and OC for the MC & OC ask game! I had soooo much fun answering those questions! If you still wanna know stuff, feel free to send in more (or just ask your own questions, that's also fine lol).

I'm also really enjoying the MC sharing era that is happening on my blog currently! So if you want to share your MC (or OCs!) with me, please do! Tell me about them, share some art if you want, or tell me how you think they would interact with Ciaran! (Or Arsenios if you like!)

Next I want to say thank you to everyone who sent me a request for the event! I'm working through them now, as I'm sure you've seen. I was feeling a little shaky with it but I think I'm getting into the swing of things now.

And lastly I wanna say that I'm still working on Arsenios's story. I thought I'd be posting chapters of it by now, but it's requiring more editing than I thought it would. I was kinda stuck for a bit because there was something about it that was bothering me, but I couldn't figure out what it was. However, I think I know what it is now, so I can start moving forward again! I'm anticipating maybe a couple more weeks.

I also know I need to update my masterlist... I'll get to that at some point too lol.

I'm always happy to receive your asks about anything and everything, so please don't be too nervous to send me something! I know it's hard, but I promise it's okay.

As always, I love you and thank you for reading!

[kousaka-ayumu]

Retrospectives

Warnings: Broken english

Kaida is staring at her diary, hand on her forehead thinking about Sebek's behaviour.

He's always acting strange, but now he's even mode stranger, though he's not the only one.

Ace, Epel, Minako have also acting strange too but most importantly Deuce's. Wierd, with her hearing, she should be able to know about the reasons why, but it didn't?

Now that she thought about it, there we're like 6 overblots this year, she was never there when Riddle, Leona and Azul overblot but she was there when Jamil, Vil and Idia overblot.

Not to mention Haru also acted strange, they almost tired, and she's worried for them though she never showed through her expression, she usually showed it through her body language.

Now that she thought about it Deuce was also acting strange too, she knows he liked her and she likes him too, if you ask her, she pointed to her ear.

She sigh as she finished writing in her diary and putting down her pen, she looked out the window, it was nighttime now. Looks like she's going to stay up night again how many times? She doesn't know....

The next day:

History class is over and now lunch has arrived, she sat at the table with the rest of Midnight Rose PreCure discussing their plans to defeat Ciaran secretively since they didn't want anyone to know, especially how the fairies wanted to keep the whole Precure thing a secret.

What about her? She's still a PreCure and her being one of the most experienced ones ended up being a support pillar for them, no she did not get attached to them if she did they may ended up the same way as Charlotte did. (Yeah totally didn't attached to them -_-)

"How do we deal with one of the generals?"

"I don't know!"

"Maybe we should split up."

"If we did then they take advantage of it and summoned the Minions of The Dead again."

"Maybe we should do it without them knowing?"

As they ended up discussing what plans they have, Kaida is trying to hear what the First Years(Ace, Deuce, Jack, Epel, Sebek and Minako) when she ended up hearing something that shook her "Yumeri" and "Overblot".

She realized that she forgot something. The next concert.

"Guys, have we forgot something.." She said, all eyes we're on her, her faerie which is a porcelain doll named Merria stared at her.

"What is it, Kaida?" The fairie said.

"The concert?"

And all hell breaks loose.

"Oh cheesecakes we forgot!"

"Don't worry I have the lyrics." She said as she pulled up a stack of paper, it's the lyrics for the next lyrics with the name "I Am Rain"

"Oh thank you Kaida! I will composed it today." Hokori said as Kaida handed over the lyrics.

"I'll meet you guys over for practice.. I have something to do.." She said as she leaves and her fairie followed her.

"Okay bye ٩(ര̀ᴗര́)ᵇʸᵉ!" Taiyou yelled cheerfully which unintentionally hurt Kaida's ears a little, ouch.

She ended up hearing a little bit of Sebek's voice, and before she knew it she ended up hearing their conversations and ended up in a very dark corridor of the school.

"You heard about Moonlight Bloom having a concert next week?" That's Ace's voice

"Yeah, not gonna lie, I was excited for them." Jack's voice

"It's means it's going to a perfect for another overblot!" Sebek's voice?! Her eyes widened in shock.

"Wonder who is going to overblot tonight?" Minako?! She knew she shouldn't be surprised that Minako is Lilith's daughter, yet why is this suprise her..

"Yumeri is the best choice, since she told me about her past." DEUCE?! Her eyes widened as she heard the revelation, is Deuce always like this? She thought he's going to be a great honor student and a police officer in the future...

"Heh? I never thought you be like this Deuce.." She said softly, no one heard it and left.

Sure she can't remember a lot during her time in Ninjago, and she didn't want to know about that, and is used to people dying around her, but betraying her... She wasn't used to that and it's from her crush... At least he's alive so she didn't have to worry about that.. Yet the thought of betraying someone makes her sick to her stomach..

She clutched her neon green ribbon of her uniform, feeling betrayed..

@zexal-club @yukii0nna @queen-of-twisted @yumeko2sevilla @writing-heiress @liviavanrouge @childofwitches @marrondrawsalot

[a-real-chicxulub-vibe]

Heyo! This is a bit out of the blue, but I am missing Ciaran and the Knights of Gwyn these days, so since I know you are a fellow Ciaran stan, I wanted to ask if you had any favorite headcanons for her? :)

Oh man!! Lots! Thank you for asking, the Lord's Blade is a seriously compelling character and I'm always happy to talk about her. :>

Here's a few to do with her pre-Knighthood days.

🥀🥀🥀

🗡️ Ciaran remembers when the world was young. Orphaned and friendless at a young age, she spent her childhood among the ghettos of New Londo, built underground to help withstand the frequent dragon attacks.

🗡️ Ciaran is indeed a full-blooded Medial, or one born of Gwyn's race. Her parents likely died in the war, though as a girl she always secretly suspected they abandoned her. All the other adults of New Londo were shady, dangerous. Her parents must have fit right in.

🗡️ As a child, Ciaran developed a passion for theater. Ciaran would eventually weaponize this to become anyone she needed to be as the mission demanded. But as a child, it was innocent, and for a time she and the other children would perform shows in the evenings. Perhaps she had always wanted to be someone else.

🗡️ Ciaran loves flowers. As a child in New Londo, sny artifacts from the surface were treasures. The glowing Darkroot Lilies became particular favorites, as they grew best in the dark.

🗡️ As a young woman, she too volunteered to fight in the Dragon War, and eventually became a Silver Knight. As a New Londo urchin, who was familiar with the humans and the shadows, she was already an outcast. She also became known for forgoing any shield on the battlefield, preferring dual swords.

🗡️ The snowy-white north was a deathtrap. The Dragons still ruled there in Ciaran's time, and the territory was of little value. Still, she and her company were assigned to go, and serve under an unproven captain.

🗡️ Those years in the north were the hardest she had ever known. Endless ice, blizzards, snowfalls higher than the top of one's head. People starved. People died. Ciaran was a recluse. She twisted orders. She broke off from formations. She was ungovernable. She was hopeless. She was going to die here. And for who?

🗡️ A great dragon ambushed the meager camp one day, and Ciaran predictably became separated. She was ready to accept her fate. But the captain leapt from the side, and misdirected the deadly strike. Shielding her with his body, he suffered horrific scars, before the dragon moved on. There, they were abandoned in the snow, left to die.

🗡️ Ciaran came to terms with the betrayal of her peers slowly. Not that she was shocked to have been forgotten, per se. She had already seen herself as unlikeable, unknowable. But the fact that one specifically of their number -- the strange young captain -- had almost died for her. And now they both lay injured and dying and alone in the snow. And with nothing else to do but wait, they talked.

🗡️ Ornstein, he said his name was. His family destroyed by the dragons, just like hers apparently was. But somehow the moron managed to twist his tragedy into a misguided sense of honor and duty. How sad. Didn't save his life, now did it?

🗡️ She heaved him onto her back that day, and they trudged through the snow. They rendezvoused with the rest of the contingent days later, where the poor captain was wheeled away by a gaggle of priests. Surely he wouldn't make it. It all was surely for naught. Everyone was going to die, one day. She couldn't understand why she had even bothered to help.

🗡️ She deserted. They could search all they want--Ciaran knew disappearing like no one else. Her next years were regrettable. She drank, she gambled. The terrible memories of the north stuck to her, like starvation to one's ribs, like frostbite to the toes. It was vital that she forgot. It was vital that she find out how to live again. It was vital she that she forget she never knew how to live at all.

🗡️ Years later, she received a plain-stamped letter. A letter of thanks. An invitation to a warm meal and a warm bed, courtesy of a nameless benefactor. How could she refuse? And indeed, how could said benefactor not find and repay the woman who long ago in the terrible North had saved his life?

sorry, I you said "favorite headcanons", but,,,

[theres-music-in-you]

The Four Phantoms In Concert (10/29/22)

AKA the night that I absolutely lost my mind in the best possible way. Long post under the cut. Buckle up.

I arrived at the venue early because my dad (who I somehow dragged along) and I are huge comic book nerds and wanted to check out a local comic store before the show. So we’re taking a shortcut through this dark alleyway next to the theatre to get to the comic store, and who do we walk by but CIARAN SHEEHAN. I froze like a deer in headlights. But he was on his phone and I was shy and a tad starstruck, and so I let him pass by. I kicked myself afterwards. Little did I know what was to come.

We get into the theatre and start to look at the merchandise. I see a mask signed by the four guys and Kaley (!!) and knew I needed to have it. We talked to the woman running the merchandise stand and I casually mention that I’m just a little obsessed with Phantom and tonight is basically a dream come true for me. She says, “I could get your mask personalized for you and you could pick it up at intermission.” I DIED. DEAD. I tried to maintain my cool but I am losing. My. Mind. Again, little did I know what was to come.

The first act of the show was incredible, as expected. John Cudia (one of my favorite Phantoms!!) sang Til I Hear You Sing and I wept. He put a hand up to cover half of his face at the line “I’ll always feel no more than halfway real” and I wept more. All of the guys were incredible. The lights come up for intermission and we book it down to the lobby to get my mask. It has my name on it. Kaley has drawn cute little stars on it. I have ascended from this astral plane. And then the merchandise stand woman says it: “I talked to some people. Since you’re such a big fan of the show, you’re going to get to go the afterparty and meet them all and take pictures with them.”

...WHAT. I am in shock. I am in tears. I thank her profusely and try not to have a heart attack as I go to sit back down for act 2.

Act 2 was even better. Kaley came out for a Phantom medley and I wept. Again. They closed the show with Music of the Night, and I noticed all four of them were subtly doing some hand/arm motions from the actual blocking. It felt like they didn’t even realize they were doing it. Very cool and also not emotional for me At All. 

And then. The after-show. I’m only slightly panicking. What do I say to these people? Hi, you shaped my life and I love you? I spoke to Brent Barrett first, who was incredibly kind. And then Kaley!! I had to tell her she was one of my favorite Christines and I was so incredibly excited to be meeting her. She was so gracious and kind. I mention I’ve seen Phantom on tour and she asks if I saw Julia (Udine, I presume.) “No, I saw...” I blank. THE Kaley Ann Voorhees is asking me a Phantom-related question and I have suddenly forgotten everything I know. Eventually I remembered Emma Grimsley and Derrick Davis after what was probably only two seconds but felt like a lifetime. We take a group photo. I thank them all again and stand off to the side, looking at my picture and trying not to lose my mind. I didn’t get the chance to talk to the other three guys, namely John Cudia, and I’m trying not to be bummed by this. 

AS IF SENSING THIS SOMEHOW, John Cudia suddenly turns right to me and comes up to talk to me. I somehow manage to get out how much of a fan of his I am, and he asks if I would like a photo of just us two!! 

The afterparty was mainly richer people who were sponsors of the show, and my dad and I feel a tad out of place and mostly people-watch at a table by ourselves. I’m feeling like we should probably just go when JOHN CUDIA once again appears and sits down to talk to us again. He remembered me from downstairs and said it was nice to see me again!! He asks if I do theatre myself, and I tell him I have absolutely no talent and but just really love theatre. He tells us a really sweet story about his daughters starting to get into theatre, and then thanks us again for coming. 

And that was it! What I thought was just going to be a concert turned into one of the greatest nights ever. Photos below (though I have blurred out my face).

The mask! How will I display it? I don’t know. 

Me next to Christine!! Love Brent Barrett peeping over my head.

AAAHHHH (also hi Franc D’Ambrosio) (also think it’s humorous that my phone screen is lit up and you can just barely see my lockscreen of Killian and Lucy).

[caelmewedd]

Aevon's Diary: Dragons

Dragons are amazing and powerful creatures that have ever lived in the world. They are fire made flesh. My daughter, Aevon has her own dragon, Nevermore. How did me and Rosalyn react when Aevon brought the dragon home? We were shocked but Nevermore is so adorable and lovable that we couldn't help but love her. However, we do not forget that she is still a dragon and should not be underestimated. Now we will tell you more about these beautiful but fearsome creatures.

Thanks dad! Yes, I have my own dragon. Although Nevermore is a cutie, it requires proper training. What does dragon training look like? The basis is to teach your dragon obedience, the dragon must learn to listen to your commands and do what you ask it to do. If you have a strong bond with your dragon, this will be a fairly easy task. Another important thing is to train it to fly as well as work on your dragon's magical skills. Each dragon has its own type of magic and unique abilities. Nevermore, for example, has the power to change its size to whatever it wants. Once it can be as big as a giant from the of a magic beanstalk, and once it can be small enough for me to carry in my purse. Pretty impressive, isn't it? Besides, Nevermore breathes fire like most dragons. This, unfortunately, we also practice, unfortunately because, ironically, I don't like fire. Fortunately, my special dragon-proof armor protects me perfectly from fire and dragon magic!

Thank goodness, you have such armor! Otherwise I would never have agreed to let you have a dragon, even if it is cute. However, I'll tell you again, BE CAREFUL! Don't make me worry about you, Aevon!

Don't worry, mom! I am mindful of my safety. Dad and Ciaran always check me to make sure my armor fits properly and that I stand far enough away when Nevermore is breathing fire.

[missymurphy1985]

The Mistake- Part 13 (Cillian Murphy X fem!reader)

Warning - smut

Taglist @queenshelby @margoo0 @being-worthy @peakyscillian @peakyciills @janelongxox @elenavampire21 @ysmmsy @cloudofdisney @lauren-raines-x @misscarolineshelby @screemqueen @peaky-cillian @misselsbells06 @datewithgianni @heidimoreton @jardinsecos @bitchwhytho @gypsy-girl-08 @queenofkings1212

Sleepless nights, dirty nappies, colic, trapped wind, and cuddles.

That was how you remembered the last three months. Everything else was a blur. But he was more settled now, sleeping longer at night, and you could see his personality starting to come through.

Aidan was now 14 weeks old, and your sister had given birth to your nephew 6 weeks ago. Little Ciaran Padraig Murphy was as adorable as Aidan, with the same little button nose their fathers shared, and the same eyes. They could have been brothers, and you absolutely adored him.

Your life had changed so much in such a short space of time, and with Cillian's help it had become your new normal. A normal that felt right. Not perfect - you still had moments when you missed your life before, but Alice had reassured you that was normal and to be expected, especially with the shock of everything.

Cillian had taken Aidan that morning after his run so you could grab a couple of hours sleep, and he was sat in the living room with Aidan on his lap stroking his little face with the lunchtime news on when you came into the room.

"Hey mama. Sleep okay?"

"Yes, thank you. How's he doing?" You asked, putting the kettle on.

"Managed to get some more wind out of him when you went to bed, then he shit all over my t-shirt," he smiled.

You couldn't help but laugh, then noticed he wasn't wearing a t-shirt. And just his tight, dark blue jeans. His hair growing longer, flopping over his eyes as he swayed his son gently on his lap. And you swore he had never looked sexier. Neither of you had slept in the same bed long enough to be intimate since you'd been given the all clear 6 weeks ago, and it was fair to say you missed his touch.

Aidan must have sensed you as he started to stir.

"Hey little man - you hungry?" Cillian lifted him up onto his chest and carried him over to you. Handing you the wriggly little bundle, he took a pre-made bottle out of the fridge and dropped it in a jug of hot water to warm through. He leaned in and kissed you gently while it warmed, stroking your hair.

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm okay. It's still taking some getting used to, but at least I don't have to worry about work now." Your closest colleague, Erin, was running the practice for you while you were on maternity leave. She'd been with you since the day you opened it, and knew the business inside out. You knew it was in safe hands, and she always kept you up to date with everything.

He kissed you again and took the bottle, tested a squirt of it on his forearm before taking Aidan from you.

"Go get showered and dressed, I'll feed him. I'm taking my little family out for the day."

You went to protest, wanting to give him a break, but he raised his eyebrow at you and you knew it was pointless. Kissing Aidan's head gently, you went back into your room to get yourself ready. A day out sounded perfect - you hadn't ventured further than the park so far.

************************************************************

Aidan slept soundly in his car seat in the back, you next to him, while Cillian drove. He'd upgraded his mini to a Range Rover shortly after Aidan was born, and as much as you loved that little red speed machine, it wasn't the most practical vehicle for a baby.

You glanced out of the window as you felt the car slow down and turn. You could see the Irish Sea in front of you, the Cork coastline and the horizon with fishing boats bobbing in the gentle waves. Bit cold for the beach, you thought, looking at the greying skies overhead. He parked up on the road and climbed out, grabbing the pushchair from the boot.

Clipping Aidan's seat into the pushchair like an absolute pro, you pushed him along, smiling as he took your hand, entwining his fingers with yours as you guided the stroller with the other. You could see people glancing at you both, clearly recognising Cillian, and you revelled in how much he just didn't care. He didn't care who saw him with you, or Aidan. Even when some tourists took photos on their phones, he never batted an eyelid.

"Right, I need you to do two things for me," he said, suddenly stopping you after you'd been walking for around ten minutes.

"I birthed your son, I think my obligations are done for a while surely?" You smirked, earning you a playful nudge from him.

"Very funny. First thing - don't be mad."

"Not a good start..."

"Shut up."

"You're not helping your case Murphy."

"Okay okay, second thing - close your eyes."

You were hesitant, that much was certain. But you did as he said and closed your eyes. You felt yourself being guided, trying not to laugh at him trying to guide both you and the pushchair, hearing him stumble every now and again. You were definitely googling him later, praying those tourists were still taking those photos.

"Okay, you can open your eyes."

You opened your eyes and looked around, confused. What was he doing?

He rolled his eyes and guided your head to just over his shoulder. A three storey townhouse, with huge gates and a massive driveway stood before you.

"It's a house."

"It's our house."

"I'm sorry, what now?"

"I bought it three weeks ago. I've had renovators in, fixing it up. It's old as fuck, needed a lot of work doing to it, but it'll be ready in a week."

"Hold on, rewind, what?"

"I bought us a house."

You didn't have the words. There were no words. This felt surreal... You physically pinched yourself, swearing under your breath when you pinched too hard.

"You don't like it...?"

"Cillian... It's... Oh my god!" You grinned, and almost screamed, nearly waking Aidan in the process who grizzled unhappily in his slumber.

"Oh thank fuck for that, you looked like you wanted to strangle me..."

"When? How? Why?"

"I'm fairly sure I've answered those, but, in order... Three weeks ago. With the money from my house sale in London. And... because I love you."

You froze. Your heart racing. Your eyes on his.

"You.. love me?"

"I've never loved anyone more than I love you. You gave me the most precious thing in the world. I've known you all my life, and my life is all the better for it. You told me once you dreamed of living on the coast. Waking up to the sea air every day. Walks along the beach at night. A sea view when you drink your coffee in the morning. This was the closest thing I could find without leaving Cork."

"You did this for me?"

"I did this for us. You, me and Aidan. You're still driving distance to work when you decide to go back. The school here is one of the best in Cork. There's a gorgeous park a mile away, the beach is a five minute walk away."

"I can't believe it..."

He took a set of keys out of his pocket and grinned. You grabbed them and ran to the house, hearing him laughing at you as you unlocked the door and went inside. He followed with Aidan, still sparked out.

Looking around the house, you couldn't believe it. The interior needed a lick of paint, which was being taken care of next week, Cillian said, once you'd decided on the colours. You stood in the brand new fully fitted kitchen and could have cried.

"You're not paying for the mortgage on your own, I pay my own way too Cill."

He mumbled something you didn't quite catch, and he smirked at you. Probably for the best you didn't hear it based on that smirk...

You quickly checked on Aidan, snoring away like his father, and turned to Cillian, biting your lip.

"So this is all ours, right now?"

"Yep."

You wandered over to him, and pressed your body as close as you could to his, backing him up against the kitchen counter.

"How could I possibly show you my gratitude?"

"Oh I'm sure you can think of something..."

You sank to your knees, and pulled his jeans down low enough for his cock to spring forward, already at full mast, standing proudly in front of you.

Without saying a word, you clamped your mouth over him, taking him as far down your throat as you could. The quiet groan from above you made your thighs clench together as your mouth bobbed over his length in earnest, conscious you probably didn't have much time.

His hands tangled into your hair, his hips thrusting forwards to meet your mouth as it licked around the tip before sinking back over, sucking against his hard length as it swelled between your lips.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck..." He kept his voice low, almost a whisper. You took his balls in one of your hands and squeezed them gently, feeling them tighten between hour fingers. Your other hand raked it's nails along his thigh, sending visible shivers through him, making him hiss above you.

"I'm not gonna last..." He gasped, panting.

You increased the speed and suction, your nails scraping along his balls, your other hand coming in to pump the base of his cock while your mouth focused on the top half of his shaft. Your tongue circling the tip as your mouth moved, sucking in your cheeks. His hands moved to the countertop now, gripping against it as you felt him begin to shake, whispering and groaning.

"That's it, that's it, holy fuck... Your mouth... So good... That's... That's fucking it, y/n... Oh...." You looked up as saw his eyes scrunch closed, his lips lock together to contain his moans as he released ropes of warm cum into your mouth. His hand moved to the back of your head, pulling it back. You held your mouth open to catch the spurts on your tongue, your hand still pumping at his shaft to empty him completely.

You swallowed every drop, wiping some off your chin and licking it slowly off your finger. Standing up, giving his cock a gentle squeeze making his legs buckle, you kissed him. A deep kiss, knowing he could taste himself, but the ferocity of his kiss in return told you he gave zero fucks about it.

Aidan grizzling in the pushchair halted any further activity, making you both groan, resting your foreheads together and laughing a little.

"Before we head back, one more thing." You said, stroking his cheek and nudging the tip of his nose with yours.

"What's that?"

"I love you, too."

[pilgrimageaesthetic]

replying to this here instead of my main--thanks for the ask!! @hollow-dweller​

i ended up infodumping, oops, so i’ll put everything under the cut.

aubade (the symphony) is my most recent Pilgrimage WIP, having worked on it up until earlier this month. It’s extremely indulgent and leans shamelessly into melodrama territory, but I’m writing it for me, okay? Themes of loss, grief, recovery, the thin horizon line between life and death, and love, love, love. All kinds of love. Every kind of love. Also my cheesy adoration for writing a bunch of seemingly-unrelated characters and tying them all together in the end.

The basic premise is that Diarmuid is a young king, whose parents passed when he was even younger. He meets a man who fascinates him, and to bring him closer he requests this man become his combat instructor. Strangers to lovers, David and Diarmuid have three years of blissful marriage. Then war comes to the kingdom, and the unthinkable happens--for Diarmuid, it’s happening again.

Sick and tired of the universe’s shit, Diarmuid sets out for a remote island that is said to have the power to give him what he seeks, accompanied only by a practitioner of forbidden magic--Geraldus--the prince of the enemy kingdom--Raymond--and a shadowy, faceless angel of death who is always standing by his side--the Mute.

//

Maybe it’s borrowed time, Diarmuid says to Ciaran at daybreak.

They’re sitting on the hillside--the same one Diarmuid had sat with his parents, with Rua and Cathal, with Máire, with David, to watch the sun rise—again and again and again.

Maybe it’s not, Ciaran replies.

A golden apple falls from the branches overhead, lands in the soft grass between them with a gentle thud, and Ciaran reaches for it. Diarmuid takes his hand instead; it’s softer these days, and thinner, with dark, arching veins that remind him of the first time he saw the horizon line of The Mountainland, before light had crested its peaks.

Maybe all of it is, Diarmuid relents.

Ciaran clasps his hand around Diarmuid’s. His grip is strong.

Maybe there’s no such thing.

The sun rises.

//

who ever said angels had to be white? is a short(-ish) story I wrote in a high school creative writing class. An elderly woman named Millicent lives alone in an old farmhouse, until a hot demon boy with the personality of a feral angsty teengager, only ever referred to as “the creature,” falls out of a lightning bolt and crash-lands in her front yard. Slice of life hijinks ensue, and as they bond, Millicent’s loneliness is relieved and the creature learns to behave... or something along those lines. Also, after re-reading the story, they definitely fall in love. What kind of love is pretty ambiguous, but the subtext is there.

The story is complete but still in my WIPs folder, because while high school-me’s writing was severely lacking in pretty much every regard, and my approach to Millicent’s various problems is clumsy and naive, I do genuinely like the core of the story. It just needs to be... completely rewritten, with some major changes. And probably given a completely different ending, because I wasn’t even satisfied with it in 2014. Also, the title--god, that title. It’s a quote from the story and I’m embarrassed just thinking about it.

//

There was an apple orchard on the property, past a few hills behind the house.  Millicent hadn’t tended to it in over a decade, but it still managed to produce fruit every year.  When the trees came into season, the creature began to spend his days among them, and Millicent could watch him from the kitchen window as he ascended to the sky and dove into the branches.  She soon learned to leave windows open, as the creature seemed content to perch on the sills like a four-legged bird, a captured apple trapped between his teeth.  He didn’t seem to mind hunching his shoulders and twisting his neck to fit into the smaller spaces, and it was always a pleasant surprise to find him balanced under the pane of a window as she went through the house about her business.

“Millicent,” he said one day, still chewing the last bite of an apple and twirling the core by the stem, “come down to the apple trees.”

Millicent looked over at him, where he was perched in the broad window at the end of the upstairs hall.  She was replacing the lightbulbs of several sconces that had gone out - she had been putting off the job long enough, and with the days getting shorter, the house needed all the light it could get.

“I’m afraid I’m too old,” she told him, turning back to her work.  “It’s too far a walk for me.”

“I’ll carry you,” he said immediately.  His toes were curled around the edge of the windowsill; despite the effort Millicent had put into fashioning shirts just for him, he still seemed pensive of anything that covered his back.  Today he was wearing a pair of baggy open-backed overalls, and nothing else.

“I’m not a fan of flying,” Millicent said evenly.  “I’d prefer to go by foot.”

“But you just said you won’t walk,” the creature protested.

Millicent smiled softly at the sconce.  “Then I suppose I’ll have to stay here.”

//

thanks for the ask, friend!! it was an interesting trip down memory lane--one of my oldest pieces of writing and one of my newest.

[mercuryislove]

Hiiiii Lynn. I hope you’re having a good week and a good funny question Friday!!

🌙 for Ciaran

❤️ for Anwei

☕️ for Yixing

🦋 for Vera

📚 for Andhira

Hiiiiii Orion! I've been having a good week! I'm close to 12k words for nanowrimo, so I'm feeling very productive and excited about the future of this writing project!!! I hope your week has been treating you right :3c

🌙 If your oc could have one wish come true what would it be and why? Would there be consequences to this wish or would they regret it once they get what they want? What would they give in return for this wish to come true?

One wish ever???? Is this a scenario like in Destiny with wish dragons and shit that will read your thoughts and twist your words and make your wish come true sometimes in the worst way possible, especially if corrupted by Darkness? Or is this just like a genie in a lamp situation? Either way, Ciaran would probably wish that none of this stupid shit ever happened. He would wish to just be fucking NORMAL again. Being unkillable and also young and beautiful forever has its perks but come on. Who wants to do this forever? When people will still try to kill you in spite of it all??? No thanks. Also he misses being sort of famous lmao. If his wish magically came true, he'd probably be sad for like. a day and then be excited about living in a world with the internet again. AND in a world where people kiss his ass because he's so good at his job (which like. they do regardless of what world he's living in lol).

OH WAIT. If he could wish to speak to his mom again, he would do that. He would give anything for that. ANYTHING. He misses the internet and he misses being famous and he misses being able to get on a plane and fly to the other side of the planet in half a day, but there is absolutely NOTHING he misses more than his mom. She was always his biggest fan and supporter and closest friend, and he would do anything even to have a single conversation with her again. Even just to talk about the weather. Even for her to ask him why he doesn't make offerings to the gods every month. Even for her to fuss at him for posting almost naked pictures of himself on instagram. Even just to say hi mom I love you. :(

--

--

❤ What would your oc's ideal lover be like? Appearance, personality, voice? Would their family approve or would it be civil war?

This is hard because Anwei doesn't really have a type. Especially in looks!! She likes tall women. She likes women with a dry sense of humor. She doesn't like smokers, but she loves someone that can keep up with her when she drinks. She likes someone she can sit in comfortable silence with. She likes women who aren't afraid to get their hands dirty. She likes women that can appreciate the fine art of baking bread. She likes women with a loud laugh. She likes women with expressive eyes and who use their hands when they talk. She doesn't like to be talked over, and she can't stand to be ignored. She likes women who focus on the details instead of just looking at the bigger picture. She likes women with a green thumb. She likes women with fraught relationships to their gender. She likes women who prefer tea over coffee. These are all so abstract lol

And the only family she has left is Ciaran. He doesn't care who her ideal lover is as long as it isn't Sihla. ANYONE but Sihla, please for the love of god. (Though even he knows that she IS Anwei's Actual Ideal Lover lol)

--

--

☕ Give us one or more of your oc's deep dark secrets! Why do they keep it hidden? Spill the tea!

I must admit I first answered this question for Anwei, who has one EXTREMELY deep dark secret in particular, but then I realized my goof. Oops.

Also trigger warning for talk of suicide. Just in case.

Um Yixing doesn't really keep any deep dark secrets. Or rather, he keeps a lot of secrets but like. If someone he's really close to asks, he'll tell them. It's no secret that he always wears long sleeves because his left arm in particular is riddled with self-harm scars from when he was 13-15 and he's insecure about it. He also has scars from a failed suicide attempt. He used to lie about his age to get jobs when he first left home because nobody wants to hire a fifteen year old with serious anger issues (but nobody ever really believed his fake age lol). When he was nineteen, he almost killed someone in a fight, and instead of getting help, he left the guy alone on the side of the road. He once stayed in a relationship with a woman for almost a year despite actively despising her, just because the sex was good. When his ten year relationship with Sonam finally fell apart, he almost tried to kill himself again, but he didn't go through with it because his neighbor stopped by to check on him. He's said before that if he ever saw his father again, he wouldn't hesitate to beat him to death with his bare hands.

HONESTLY he keeps most of those secret because who the fuck would bring those things up in conversation anyway? Who asks about your last suicide attempt? Who needs to know that shit?? Anyone would see his skin and know immediately what the scars are from. Anyone that gets to know him on more than the most basic level will see that he has capital p Problems, but he doesn't need to talk about almost choking a stranger to death for them to know that.

--

--

🦋 If your oc would change everything (or just something) about their life, would they? What would they change? What do they think would happen if they did? What would their loved ones think?

Vera would change everything ever. Except maybe the people who raised her. Realistically she would probably just go back to the day of her birth and make it not happen at all lmao. Obviously that would require like. altering the course of time a little too much, so maybe she wouldn't go that far but there's definitely a lot she'd want to fix. She wasn't particularly enthusiastic about her career path and at times felt pressured into it because she was so good at it, so she would definitely change that. And if she didn't change her career for some odd reason, then at the very least she would have never taken on an apprentice, never become attached to other hunters, never become romantically involved with another hunter, and NEVER accepted the hunt on January 18, 1991. I mean, if she altered THAT much of her life, she would certainly be a happier and healthier person. Also less traumatized. Probably friendlier too? And her loved ones would be, well, also probably happier and healthier and less traumatized too, because it hasn't been a walk in the park to raise her and care for her and help her through all her many, many crises.

--

--

📚 If your oc was given some kind of forbidden knowledge, what would they do with it? Would they tell anyone? Use it for evil or good? How would it change their outlook on life, if at all?

I'm trying to think of what would constitute forbidden knowledge in this case........ Either way, Andhira would for sure use whatever she learned to her own means. Her family is already at the top of the food chain in basically every aspect, so it wouldn't really be useful as a way to improve her social standing or increase their power or to sell for infinite riches or whatever. The first thing she would do is go to her mother and share everything with her, and then they would decide what to do with it together. I guess she could use it to keep other people out of her way. To solve pest problems, as it were lol. Oh, she could definitely use this mystery knowledge as leverage. Make people owe her favors and/or manipulate them into working for her. She doesn't ever think in terms so limiting as “good” or “evil,” but by our pathetic mortal standards it would probably be for evil! (She's not necessarily a bad person, but like. there is a reason her family is at the top of the food chain and it isn't because they're very polite people.)

[phantomnostalgist]

Classic Phantom memories - Peter Karrie at the stage door

Thanks for all the follows! I haven't attempted to look through or follow anyone back as I'll end up overwhelmed, but I'm really glad so many people are interested in past Phantoms and POTO fandom! And that the show is going to re-open after Covid with original staging intact, hooray. (Please keep your own masks on too!)

Me standing next to the poster of Peter Karrie's Phantom, outside Her Majesty's, some time in 1993.

As Peter Karrie was my favourite Phantom, I'll have to split those memories up over many posts (including Les Mis and concerts, and at some point will scan older Karrie-related playbills I collected). So I'll start with some stage door memories, and my signed playbill from his last night at HM's in 1993.

Peter was always one of the nicest guys to meet at the stage door, pretty much legendarily so, as he was very warm and down to earth, and also used to give huge hugs! I don't have a whole lot of photos from back then, but I did find this one  of myself and another fan with Peter at the stage door of Her Majesty's in 1993. I love how darn happy she looks! Ahh, the magic of stage doors. We must have met him a few times by then, as she's wearing a t-shirt from his "Beyond the Masque" concert tour (which had been a few years earlier, but we bought the t-shirts, of course). I'm only not giving her name in case she wouldn't want it included (will of course give credit if she contacts me asking for it).

Peter also took us both backstage when we went out to Toronto to see him again in 1994, though as I was lucky enough to get backstage tours at 3 theatres over the years, I can't remember specifically how much I saw that time. But I do remember seeing the Red Death costume up close as it was hanging in the wardrobe in his dressing room. (Most amazing backstage tour I ever got was also in Toronto, but from Ciaran Sheehan - story to come in future!)

As I got to work on Peter's concert tour, doing the merchandise stand (mostly 1995), my general memories of him are mushed together in time and space. And doing the merchandise stall was great, as I got to see all the shows free, travel and food paid, and make some money - plus arrive early and sit watching the set-up and sound tests, and be legitimately allowed to generally be hanging around in theatres for hours. After one concert in Cardiff, Peter's home town, I got included in having dinner afterwards with several of his family members. As I was still basically a shy socially awkward fangirl back then it would have been pretty overwhelming to me, but his mum Jean was an incredibly warm and lovely woman, who sort of took me under her wing for the evening. So I basically sat fangirling Peter Karrie with his mum, lol. Also Peter's wife Jane was always friendly and nice to me, which I appreciated as I felt fairly self-conscious about being a starry-eyed fangirl!

I think the main thing I remember about conversations with Peter over the years, along with his generosity towards fans, is laughing a lot - he tells great stories, and has a big laugh. And I remember some time in the mid 90s, him telling me about a teenage Phantom fan who'd shadowed him in the role in Toronto, who he thought had an outstanding voice and hoped would continue on to a great future in musical theatre. As the guy's name was Ramin Karimloo, it stood out to me, being unusual - and of course now stands out as someone who's maybe the biggest favourite of modern Phantoms!

As for his performance in the role, just WHOAH on every level - but I'll get to that another time! (He was my second stage Phantom - first was Peter Polycarpou, who didn't stand out to me compared to the OLC, as of course my introduction and emotional first was Michael Crawford.)

Below are pix of my signed program from his last night in the role at Her Majesty's October 9th 1993. I remember there was much weeping (of us fans), and much hugging (us fans of each other, Peter of us), and he spent some half hour or so there with us. Christine and Raoul were Jill Washington and Simon Burke, so there's a pic of their signatures too. I really liked both of them in the roles - Simon Burke I remember managing to give Raoul a bit more passion and interest than most Raouls, and Jill Washington had a beautiful voice.

Signed “To Christine, I shall miss you - Peter, 9/10/93″ (aww).

[bard-llama]

Can I just thank you for writing some Ciaran x Ves? I feel like I was the only one who thought that ship possible. XD

Absolutely! I actually have a lot of feelings about Ciaran and Ves as equals and opposites, but in a wholly different way than Iorveth and Roche. Like, okay, for both elves, loving a human (especially this human) is kinda awkward and needs to be worked through. But for Roche - hating elves is his job, not his passion. Like, that doesn’t mean he’s not racist, because you absorb unconscious racist behavior and assumptions just by existing in a racist society. BUT to him, he thinks he’s not racist.

Ves, on the other hand. Ves is kinda a proud racist. She’s got a LOT to work through. Because to her, the hatred is very personal and is a direct line back to the abuse she suffered at the hands of the Scoia’tael. But not just that - she has a line that in the small village she lived in, all they cared about were 2 things: if the crops were good and if the Scoia’tael would move into the forest. And when they DID, they wiped out her village AND kept her as a “trophy”, so to speak. Growing up with that kind of fear and then having that fear seemingly justified? That’s enough to fuck someone up bad. 

So then Ves is rescued and (in my stories), Roche lets her kill her captor/abuser/rapist. Which is good for short-term catharsis and it can be good for your brain to logically know that they’ll never come back and hurt you again. BUT just because your brain knows it doesn’t mean YOU do. PLUS, she then went on to join the military in a heavily racist society and then is specifically assigned to hunt nonhumans/Scoia’tael. As in, the very same creatures from her nightmares. To her, they aren’t people. They’re all monsters, because that’s how her mind has protected itself. Elf = Scoia’tael = Monster = Let’s kill it. 

So for her to finally work through all that - well, 1) this girl could use some serious therapy. I mean, they all could, but yeah. 2) She has to get to a point where she realizes not only that her assumptions are WRONG, but that they need to be changed. Because one doesn’t always follow the other and cognitive dissonance is a helluva thing. So she has to get to a point (most likely through external factors, lbr) where she’s no longer able to just murder any elf she wants. AND she has to see that as an acceptable state of being, one that she abides by willingly. As you can imagine, that’s a bit of a tall order for her, ESPECIALLY if she’s never examined her biases before. Which she probably hasn’t, because it HURTS to do that, especially when the biases are tied up with some serious trauma. 

Okay, apparently I have a lot of thoughts on Ves. BUT this ask was about Ciaran/Ves, SO let’s talk about how that can happen (and btw, it’s happening in, at minimum, 2 of my ‘verses). So, say Ves develops enough that she’s even able to THINK a nice thought about an elf and not immediately rebel. How does she get together with Ciaran?

Tbh idk yet. BUT I think a lot of it depends on where Ciaran is in the universe. In something like the petals and stripes or king and country, Ciaran’s view of humans is much more favourable than, say, Don’t Cry for Me, Temeria, where he’s taking a very anti-human stance (though that will eventually adjust). Which is all to say - first he has to realize he has feelings for a human. THAT human. Then he has to ACCEPT it. In a universe where Iorveth and Roche are already together, I think Iorveth could be a big support in helping him come to accept that. Also, I really, really want some elves bitching about their weird-ass humans. But anyway, Ciaran has to come to accept his feelings. That’s the personal development. THEN they somehow gotta figure out relationship development TOGETHER. Which means communication instead of stabbing lmao. Ves struggles with this even more than Ciaran does. But they’ll get there eventually. I think their “courtship” so to speak would be VERY bumpy and rough, but I think once they get together and like, actually function as a pair? Bro, they could rule the fucking world, lbr. They wouldn’t WANT to, but they could. But yeah, I see it becoming kind of... a stable touchstone that Ves or Ciaran can lean on as they work to adjust to the world around them, which is ALSO working to be less racist in... pretty much every universe, tbh, though it looks different in each one. What can I say, I’m a sucker for societal growth and improvement.

[ex-textura]

Has Ciaran discovered anything about himself since the crash that he *doesn't* hate? (doesn't have to be something he likes, can be neutral like a sweet tooth or knowledge of a niche subject, etc)

He likes music, and he's pretty okay at it too. His voice isn't anything to write home about but it certainly isn't awful and when they're on the road and Karlach starts to hum and he starts to make up silly little songs to go with it and she bursts into a smile? Best feeling ever.

He's not ready to pick up a lute again just yet but found a flute somewhere along the way and has been dabbling in that as well. It's nice.

He's pretty funny, too. His humour is sarcastic and low-key and sometimes it'll come out darker than is socially acceptable but... he makes people laugh when they're least expecting it. Gale once commented on his persistent sense of humour and he preened about it for hours.

His knowledge of anatomy, while.... worrisome... in origin, has led to him being able to help people and even their owlbear cub friend. It's useful, now. So he appreciates it.

According to Karlach, he gives good hugs.

The good things get lost easily in all the trauma and heartache but... they're there. And they're holding him together.

[misc-obeyme]

Yeah all right, Sunday night feels like the time for me to do a writing status update so here I am.

I realize I haven't posted any new writing yet this month. I finished the event requests and I've been trying to focus on finishing the editing for Arsenios's story so that I can finally start posting chapters.

I want to be honest with you guys: I am currently struggling with a stubborn bout of depression. Please don't worry about me, I'm in therapy and I'm working through it. But my motivation is very low right now.

It makes writing difficult in general, so I've only been working on it a little bit at a time lately. I love Arrie's story and I don't want it to suffer because of this, so I'm trying to keep my momentum without pushing myself too hard. I have good days and bad days, so it just depends.

There are a couple of things that require less energy that I've been messing around with. The first is the other OCs in this story. I went ahead and added them (as well as the OCs for Ciaran's backstory) onto my OC & MC Masterpost. They don't have profiles yet, just names and a general description of what their character does. (Feel free to ask me about them if you want to.) But I'm going to work on profiles for them too. It's a low key kind of thing that's still related to the story, you know?

I seem to have lost all motivation for canon character fics. Which is annoying because I still have a bunch of ideas. But when I think about them, I can't focus on them at all.

I've been getting a lot of asks lately, which I love. Please never stop sending them. However, I do get more than I can answer in one day now. So my response time has increased to three or four days at times, depending on how many I have. Just know that I never ignore asks, so I will always get to it at some point.

In the meantime, if you guys want to send in little drabble requests, I think I would like that very much. Drabbles being less than 500 words. Give me a character (canon or OC, either way), give me a small idea, and tell me you want a drabble. I'm not going to say my requests are open, but if you've read this whole post and see this, know that you can send something like that in. :)

Thank you all for being here. I'm sorry for the lack of writing as of late, but I'm hoping to start feeling more like myself again soon.

As always, I love you and thank you for reading!

[jupitersflytrap]

SUMMARY OF NEW WEST END LES MIS BECAUSE I JUST SAW IT ( hella long post)

ACT I

look down was just a brillant start to a brilliant show

THEY ADDED PETIT GERVAIS OH MY GOD

amazing, amazing valjean. 24601/10

valjean got absolutely battered by mr “feel the weight of my rod”

also there were flaming torches now and throughout which was pretty sick

valjean crying when the bishop redeems him

the hordes in at the end of the day had their shawls taken off to become the factory girls which was cool

there was a PROPER SCRAP between fantine and the factory girl

there was a lot of fighting in this actually

it was good tho

carrie hope fletcher just... *chefs kiss*

no teeth pulling for fantine in lovely ladies

and all the ladies were really good too

when fantine told valjean her story she was clinging onto him and crying it was… very emotional

have i mentioned javert yet? because he was really really good, bradley jaden really came through

fantine dying was extremely sad. as usual.

THE CONFRONTATION WAS THE BEST EVER IT WAS A PROPER FIGHT AND OOOH IT WAS JUST GREAT

THE UNIFIED “JAVERT!” GAVE ME CHILLS I SWEAR

anyways

madame. frickin. thénardier. was excellent. she was a really nice change from the normal pantomime vibes, like a cross between that and helena bonham carter in the film

the actor playing thénardier had some problem with his vocal chords so he wasn’t on, but the cover was acting his heart out and trying his best to sing but i think he’d lost his voice too which was a huge shame. he was still really good and funny though.

that master of the house… my god. hilarious.

there was a new bit at the start of it??? very exciting. it was like,,, people ordering drinks i think

valjean and little cosette was… so cute i literally can’t

the bargain was brilliant as per

GAVROCHE WAS AMAZING

look down featured enj and marius getting told off by the police and getting their banner taken down

also enjolras??? hello?????? he was amazing and pretty much exactly how i picture him. stellar work ashley gilmour.

and harry apps was a brilliant marius, big brick!marius energy

and!!! eponine was so cheeky with marius it was adorable

stars?????? amazing. emotional. the street-lamps were on wires which was nice.

red and black!!!!! new!!!!! harmonies!!!!!!! yes!!!!! also it was perfect in general marius was so melodramatic and grantaire was so… sexual with the bottle

do you hear the people sing!!!! oh lord i heard them!!

also all of les amis were just great

in my life!!!!! oh cosette!!! marius!!!! eponine!!!!!! oh god they were all so well cast and their voices were all unique and beautiful

a heart full of love!! my heart is full of love for this cast!!

oh side note montparnasse was very handsome and had a knife

ONE DAY MOOOOOOORE was as rousing as ever

ACT II

on my own,,,,, oh god my tears, shan ako’s voice is just gorgeous and i love what she did with the song

monsieur warnings was great

and the spy javert?? excellent scene. “SHOOT THE BASTARD” great work gav

they said “incoming!” instead of “there’s a boy climbing the barricade!” which i think was more fitting tbh

yeah so eponine got shot and little fall of rain nearly broke me

grantaire was holding gavroche back :(( my heart

AND WHEN SHE DIED HER HAT CAME OFF AND GAVROCHE HANDED IT BACK TO MARIUS OH MY GOD

drink with me had no right to be that emotionally devastating

grantaire was angry and enjolras tried to comfort him but he pushed him away :((((

on the upside tho whoever it was that sang the line about witty girls who went to their beds then got slapped by the witty girl it was directed towards lmao

OKAY SO bring him home!!!!!!!!! NORMALLY i really don’t like this song it feels a bit like torture to me BUT!! MR JON ROBYNS MADE IT SO GOOD, I WAS HANGING ONTO HIS EVERY WORD AND IT WAS JUST BEAUTIFUL

also the staging was great he was sitting on the barricade above sleepy marius

it was just generally great and the old man sitting near me audibly said WOW when he started singing

okay now it’s time for the deaths

FIRST OFF gavroches death was...... harrowing. he made it back to the top of the barricade before he died. when he got shot there was like a blood effect and i was just,,, shook tbh

now the other deaths

hoooooly shit

enjolras died first and i was not prepared AT ALL so i just started sobbing

everyone else died and grantaire was last f

it was super sad and i was crying basically the whole way through this bit lmao

jvj + marius -> sewers

BUT FIRST the bit with enjolras dead hanging off the cart!!! oh no!!!!!! the tears!!!! and when they picked up gavroche and put them together i just,,

yep

okay now dog eat dog

don’t like this song much but it served its purpose in distracting me from my tears by suddenly pulling teeth out before my very eyes

thanks thénardier

back to the surface! it’s javert! speaking in third person again! he’s very unhinged now which i like, hair all loose and everything

oh god the soliloquy i just,,,,, oh god, the staging of this was amazing but i won’t spoil it :))

TURNING YES IT WAS ALL I COULD HAVE HOPED FOR

empty chairs… oh marius baby he looked so broken, and all the candles were great as ever

oh marius whatever will we do with you

not to worry cosette is here to make it all better with her amazing voice, and her weird dad to make it all worse again with a criminal record

huge brick!marius energy here, very much passive until valjean told him to be angry lmao

THE WEDDING!! IT WAS SO SWEET! cosette’s dress was gorgeous

the thénardiers were great here as well, mrs thénardier was eating snacks the whole way through the bargain with marius

and marius punched thénardier in the stomach

i also cackled very loudly when mrs t tried to pass off stealing the silver as a magic trick

valjean kicked the bucket in the most stunning way he could have tbh

and of course the reprise of dyhtps had me in tears as always

amazing

just amazing

STAGE DOOR

added bonus: i got to chat to and get autographs of a few of the cast at stage door

they were all lovely!! carrie, shan, ciaran, harry, lily, jon, loved ya

also harry had a cut on his hand and someone asked how he’d got it and he said “i wish i could say it was on the barricade, but i cut it on a can of baked beans” and if that’s not the most in character thing ever i don’t know what is.

okay intense summary over hope u enjoyed

[intakeofbreath]

Details (Chapter 7)

Fandom: Dark Souls (Video Games), Dark Souls III Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Relationships: Lord's Blade Ciaran & Dragon Slayer Ornstein, The Nameless King/Dragon Slayer Ornstein, Artorias the Abysswalker/Lord's Blade Ciaran Additional Tags: Pining, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Hurt/Comfort, Alcohol, Vomiting, Tags May Change Summary: Secrets can also be told by corporal language and Ciaran is too good at reading it.

AO3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23427736/chapters/58109368

AO3 link to first chapter: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23427736/chapters/56150551

“I think I’m going crazy. I don’t know why I even listen to you in first place.” Ornstein voice came out as a whine.

He was laying splattered on Ciaran’s bed, covered with a heavy blanket although the room was starting to get warm thanks to the fireplace they littled a hour ago to endure the winter days of Anor Londo.

Ciaran was sitting on the frame of her window, also covered with a blanket, and reading a book deeply absorbed by it. After hearing Ornstein’s voice, she hummed and briefly raised her eyes from the words without paying too much attention to him. “Weren’t you going to take a nap?”

Ornstein let out a sigh and mumbled, “I just couldn’t sleep...”

It had been the weirdest and most stressful month Ornstein had ever had in his life. First, he spent every day training that damned knights of Osmela and just the thought of them made him grunt and writhe with disgust. They were nothing compared to their Silver Knights, who were so respectful, hard-working and prone to learn. No, they were the completely opposite and they sure got on his nerves more than once since the first day they put a foot on the training field. 

No wonder they were at the very verge of losing a war if they took so lightly the commands from their captains. Goddamned, even them seemed like they didn’t hold any authority upon their knights!

Ornstein didn’t know how he ended up forcing some respect upon them, but he recalled he kicked many of their asses clouded by anger, and they were far less than the amount he actually wanted to kick. Not like he was proud of it and neither used to resort to that kind of behavior towards his knights, but, god, he reached a point where he didn’t know what else he had to do with them anymore.

Secondly, and out of nowhere, Artorias started to avoid him too and weirdly act around him. He just walked off wherever they happened to be on the same room and he just stopped meeting him between their shifts to chat for a while. Ornstein knew their meets weren’t arranged at all, they just came across each other because their paths crossed, but that only served to create a weird feeling on him. Why he was avoiding him? Surely, that didn’t made Ornstein sad like Ciaran was, but oh, he was starting to get really pissed off.

And last but not least, for some unknown reasons, Prince Gwynsen started to need him more around him, even to do errands he always has done by himself. In fact, he didn’t complain, he was always glad to be able to serve him, but it was the worse moment to start demanding so many things of him. And if he wasn’t training knights, he was running behind the Prince every minute he was awake. 

It was awfully exhausting. So, if before Osmela Knights came Ornstein barely has free time, during the last month he didn’t have time to breath or even blink. And when the knights finally left for good, leaving Ornstein at the very verge of a mental breakdown, Ciaran successfully convinced him to go on leave, though the urge to get things done didn’t stop chasing him.

Ornstein groaned, sitting with his legs folded on the bed. “I shouldn’t have took a week off. This was such a stupid idea!”

Ciaran was on leave too, because knowing the bundle of nerves her friend was, it was better to kept him company and prevent him to run back to Lord Gwyn and renounce his days off after being one hour without anything to do. So far, it was working, but the only drawback was hearing him whine almost every minute.

“How about you do something more interesting than laying in my bed?” She said, turning a page without looking at him.

“Any thoughts?”

“I don’t know, why don’t you start painting again? You can use the paper and ink from my desk.”

Ornstein looked at the furniture with a long face and, after a couple of seconds, dismissed the idea with a noise. “I don’t feel like it.”

Ciaran let out a sigh, rolling her eyes and resuming her reading, but just when she turned another page, her face lit up with a new idea, “Wait, I know the perfect thing you can do!” He gave her a lazy sideway look, and when Ornstein saw that Ciaran had that smirk on her face, he knew that whatever she was going to say next it was far from perfect. 

Quickly, she rushed to his side and started to push him out of the bed. “Go grab your coat.”

“Why?” He asked, grimacing.

But Ciaran just kept pulling him through the room by his arm, until she opened the door and widely smiled at him. “We are going to the market.”

And just like that, they headed off the castle.

At first, Ornstein thought Ciaran was referring to the highest part of the city, which was full of elegant shops, not so far of the castle and where many servants stopped by to do their God’s errands. But no, an hour’s walk later confirmed him the contrary when they both reached the lower part of the city, walking past people far away form the divine in a noisy street full of shops with a cold weather that didn’t invite at all to be outside.

Ornstein looked down to Ciaran, who happened to be enjoying the walk way too much, looking around with excitement, and asked her, “So, where are we going to?”

Ciaran looked up at his clearly uncomfortable expression for being surrounded by a lot of people, and smiled, “I want to buy a book.”

Ornstein hummed, “Don’t you have plenty of them already?”

“Not this one! Besides, what is the problem of having new books?”

“Well, you still have a huge pile of unread books and you are supposed to read them first!”

Suddenly, Ciaran grabbed him by his arm and pointed to a bookshop. It looked very old from the outside, with a wood sign, where you could read the name of the shop, hanged on top of the door. And when they crossed it, they were welcomed by the heavy smell of old wood. It was so strong that Ciaran sneezed multiple times and Ornstein felt the urge to clear his throat. There were several shelves stacked up with books, books piled up on the floor, on desks and on a counter. Behind it, a young man with a weird hat was seated reading a book, and after hearing the jingling of the door, he raised his gaze with a kind smile.

He greeted them and asked if they needed help. After that, Ciaran approached him and started to ask him about the book she needed. Ornstein, meanwhile, started to wander between the shelves, curiosity growing though he wasn’t an avid reader as much as Ciaran or Artorias were.

Ornstein noticed the books weren’t classified with any criteria, they were just placed on the shelves carelessly, and a lot of them looked like they have seen better times. He passed his finger over the spine of the books, skimming through the titles, on the background he could heard the muffled voices of Ciaran and the bookseller. Their searching appeared to take longer than needed, so Ornstein started to pick up random books and skim through the pages, and after a while, he was taken aback when one of the books turned out to be about Lordran’s history.

Now, with his curiosity picked, he flipped the pages until he reached where the Dragon War was mentioned, greeted by an ink drawing of the Lords. Unconsciously, he held his breath for a second, admiring how magnificent they were portrayed even on paper, including that treacherous dragon. He only stopped when a title caught his attention to briefly read the explanation written down, most of the time wrinkling his nose slightly annoyed because the book wasn’t telling what really had happened back there. 

Suddenly, a drawing of the Knights of Gwyn caught his attention, and Ornstein knitted his eyebrows, humming surprised, because he have been... drawed significantly shorter than Artorias. And that was completely inaccurate! He wasn’t that short, just a few centimeters shorter than him, but not a whole head!

“What are you reading?” Ciaran’s voice startled him, and Ornstein jumped, closing the book abruptly and returning it back on his place. 

“Nothing, just a stupid book…” She arched an eyebrow, humming appreciatively. “Did you find what you needed?”

“Yes!” She showed him a cooking book and he raised his eyebrows.

“So you didn’t give up.”

“Of course not! I found it quite funny actually. Gough’s recipes helped me a lot to learn, but I don’t want to ask him for recipes every time I want to do something new, so… Oh! I could cook you something tomorrow!”

“If it won’t poison me, I don’t mind to try it…”

Ornstein giggled when Ciaran playfully pushed him, and then, they left the shop. Once they started to walk down the street, Ciaran searched inside the bag she has brought with her.

“By the way,” pulling out a book, she continued, “I bought this for you, now you can have something to do and not spent all the day whining about being bored in my bedroom.”

Ornstein gave her a questioning glance, grabbing the book from her hands and scanning the cover, though the title said nothing about the content of the book.

“Oath? What is this about?”

Ciaran giggled, looking at him mischievously. “Oh, you know... It’s just a story about a secret passionate and torrid romance between a princess and her faithful knight,” she said, entonning every word with a fervil energy. “The bookseller told me that it’s a very popular book right now.”

Ornstein’s expression fell off, completely white, but then his lips parted with a nervous smile. “No, you are just teasing me. I don’t believe you, you have to be kidding.”

“Well, you can confirm it by yourself,” she said, giving him a signal with her hand to go on.

Ornstein knitted his eyebrows, insecure, and opened the book by half to start reading. 

With every passing word he read, his face blushed harder and harder, after he abruptly closed the book and looked bewildered at Ciaran, who let out a loud laugh.

“Why the fuck did you buy me this?! Have you opened and read it?! This… This is totally blasphemous and improper!” Ornstein was stumbling on his words, and looked like he needed to remember how to breath. He had spoken in a higher tone than expected, causing a couple of people to turn and look at him. 

Ciaran whipped some tears out of her eyes, and needed a couple of seconds to regain her breath before grabbing the book from his hands and read the page he was on. “Aw, you opened the book where they fuck, I’m sure you have ruined the story for yourself.” Then, she let out a whistle and murmured, “Damn, this is really explicit… Maybe I should borrow this in the future...”

Ornstein loudly grunted, wanting to throw that damn book away and kick Ciaran’s ass with all the force he had.

“Don’t take it too serious, Ornstein, it’s just fiction!” Ciaran said between giggles. “Is not like it could happen in reality, isn’t it?”

He let out a strangled suffering noise from the deepest of his throat, which only made Ciaran start to laugh again. 

“Oh, for the Lords, it’s so easy to mess with you!”

Ornstein narrowed his eyes to her, denying with his head and grimacing. “Your humour is the worst...”

“Aw, come on, but look at how cute you look, all red and flustered.” She reached her hand up to pinch his red cheek, but it was quickly pushed aside, though the shadow of a smile could be started to be seen on his lips.

“You are unbearable, do you know that? No wonder Artorias doesn’t want to be near you, with all that damn teasing of yours.”

“Excuse you?!” Ciaran made an exaggerated gesture, bringing her hand to her chest and gasping, to seem like she was really hurted.

Ornstein expression fell off after noticing what he had just said. “Oh my Lord, I’m so so sorry, Ciaran, I didn’t mean to-” He shut up when she puffed, pushing him by his arm. 

“I know Ornstein! I got it was a joke, don’t worry!” Ciaran reassured him with a soft laugh. “Let’s kept going, all right? I need to visit other shops.” 

He looked down at her and, for a moment, he felt really dumb, but Ciaran didn’t pay much attention to him, and kept walking with the book back in her bag.

They spent the next hours visiting clothing stores and an antique shop, just because Ciaran saw a figure that reminded one that her mother owned years ago at her first home. When they finished, it was starting to get dark, and they were very tired from the walk. Both, Ciaran and Ornstein, thought they wouldn’t be on time to attend the dinner and decided to stop by a tavern and order some food. 

Surprisingly, after they have eaten half of their food, Ciaran ordered a bottle of ale and Ornstein arched an questioning eyebrow at her. “Why? You don’t usually like to drink.”

Ciaran shrugged with a smile. “Why not? We’ve earned it.” 

She grabbed the bottle and poured the drink in their glasses and then, pointed the mouth of the bottle to Ornstein. “We’ve spent many days sad because of some damn idiots.” He opened his mouth to punctuate that, in fact, Prince Gwynsen was not an idiot, but Ciaran didn’t let him the time, “It’s time for us, my friend, that we have some fun for once.”

And they started drinking, and Ciaran forgot that Ornstein had no control over the alcohol, and when she should have stopped him from drinking most of the content of the several bottles they ordered, she was far way too tipsy to care about it.

They didn’t know how they got to the castle’s door and passed through the poor guards keeping everybody outside. Maybe Ciaran threatened them, or was it Ornstein? Either way, they stumbled over their feets multiple times through every corridor they went through, grabbing onto each other and laughing loudly with almost every word they let out. But until Ciaran didn’t abruptly stop, causing Ornstein to collide with her back, they didn’t shut up their mouths. 

Ornstein looked where Ciaran had her gaze fixated and suddenly felt like he was floating on a cloud just by looking at his beautiful Prince. He was standing right besides Artorias, who, for once, wasn’t covering his face with his helmet. They could see the quickly movement of their eyes, switching between them and Ornstein’s coat over Ciaran’s shoulders, and their weird expressions that Ornstein didn’t bother to decipher. 

Then, suddenly, the Prince moved quickly to Ornstein’s side with a frown on his face and placed a hand on his jaw to lift his face. The knight just gave him a goofy smile. 

“What the hell happened to you?” he snarled, and briefly looked angrily at Ciaran. “You have blood on your face.”

Ornstein reached a hand to touch it and when his fingers brushed against his nose, he took a sharp breath. “Ah… Probably I fell in some stairs?” He carried every word, and letting out a giggle he continued, “I don’t remember very well, my apologies, my highness.”

Gwynsen arched an eyebrow after hearing my . “Are you drunk?”

Once again, Ornstein giggled, tilting his head. “No... Well, just... A little.”

The prince sighed, letting him go, and before he could say anything else, Ciaran started to angrily speak behind them.

“You, asshole!” Ciaran was trying to hit him again square on the chest at the same time she tried to not be grabbed by a nervous Artorias. “You don’t speak with me for weeks and now you say you are worried about me?! What do you think I am? A fool?!”

Artorias finally grabbed her wrists but she started to shake them with all the force she could came up with on her drunkenly state. “Don’t touch me!”

“Ah… Ciaran, please don’t scream.” Artorias looked really overwhelmed.

Ornstein stepped away from the Prince’s reach and walked to Artorias with an angry face. After noticing that, the wolf knight raised his eyebrows in a plea to Ornstein. “Oh, please, don’t hit me you too...” 

But his friend only touched his chest with his index finder, making him flinch, though when nobody was punched, Artorias let out a relieved sigh.

“Yeah... She’s damn right, you are an asshole. Don’t you have a heart?” Ornstein was tapping his chest with his finger repeatedly. “Have you no consideration nor even thought about what she may be feeling? I’m very disappointed at you… I mean, you can ignore me as much as you like, but her?!”

Ornstein raised his voice when he said the last question, pointing with his other hand at Ciaran, who hardly kicked Artorias’ leg, full of angry, breaking her free. He grunted in pain and looked with a plea at the Prince, who finally stepped between the three knights and put Ornstein aside, grabbing him by his arm and shoulder.

“That was fantastic, Ornstein, I’m sure he has learnt his lesson and will stop his dumb behaviour and apologize with Ciaran, right, Artorias?” The Prince accentuated the question, giving him a sideway look. 

Artorias nooded rapidly, avoiding to look at Ornstein or Ciaran, but that was enough to  satisfy Ornstein, who hummed contently and returned to dreamily gaze up at the face of Gwynsen.

“Let’s get you to your room and leave them alone to clear up their problems,” continued the Prince, placing a hand on Ornstein’s upper back to guide him.

“As you like, my highness.”

“Wait, Ornstein,” called Ciaran, opening her bag and handling him the book. “Mmm… Don’t forget your things.”

“Thank you very much!” Ornstein lengthen the words with a smile, extending his arm to grab it from her.

In the time the book was passed from hand to hand, Artorias and Gwynsen had the chance to look at the cover and recognize the title. Artorias opened his mouth, repressing a gasp in his throat, and both of them looked at each other with their eyebrows raised with astonishment.

[chryspiracy]

Hey um, I was the person who angrily attacked your friend, intimatopia/forstlic/asecondlight on her KrayLio fanfic months ago. I'm really sorry I acted out like that, I was really angry and stressed looking at pro-Lio/anti-Galo Tweets. I'm not going to yell at you or anything if love Lio but dislike Galo with a passion, but I just want to know why your friends highly prefer Lio with Gueira and Meis rather than with Galo(since you don't like him as a character).

Note: I showed this to Ciaran, and they said that if you’d like to discuss it, they aren’t mad, and you can message them off anon for their discord.

Okay, first of all, thank you for apologizing, but I’m not the one you should be apologizing *to,* and it is... a little weird and uncomfortable that you’re coming into my inbox with this, especially considering I’m on Tumblr so little I’m fairly certain you must’ve found me by going through Ciaran’s twitter mutuals/ao3 comments and then through my carrd, but y’know what, I’ll give a go at answering your question anyway.

To be quite clear: I am not her. I *don’t* universally share every one of their tastes, nor do the rest of their friends. I like GaloLio just fine, as well as MB3, and hell, all four of them together. And honestly, Ciaran was the one who sold me on MB3 so hard in the first place.

My *personal* feelings about Galo? Well, he’s not my favorite, because he’s just not the type of character I usually click with, but I don’t dislike him. He’s a perfectly fine character, plenty of people have done fun stuff with him, and I was never that invested in *any* of the Promare cast, anyway.

Why I like MB3? Well, I like most ships, I’m not picky. But yeah, the way Ciaran wrote it was what *really* sold me on the dynamic—I like polyships, and I like ships with history, and I like teams with a lot of trust. I LOVED the way they characterized Gueira and Meis and Lio and how the three balanced out—Lio’s messiness with Meis’s prickliness with Gueira as the chaotic emotional anchor. It was fun to read. And, honestly, I’d love to see what Ciaran might’ve done with Galo too, since I’m sure she would’ve come up with something fantastic for him, but he never wanted to and that’s that.

As for Ciaran (Once again, I must stress that I am *not him* and do not speak for him and even what little I’m putting down here could be wildly off-base because I am so not the person you should be asking), I don’t think they truly *hate* him either. She made the occasional joke about how they Do Not Care about him, but I always read that as disinterest + a little vented exasperation at how inescapable GaloLio stuff is—and, y’know, they got louder about it after your comment. Ultimately, he projected on Lio a lot, and MB3 pinged more shipping checkmarks in her brain. I’m not going to explain for them further, because once again, as I cannot stress enough, *I am not them.*

I absolutely promise you their preferences were not a personal attack. Just having fun with the characters in a way triggered his personal id, like most people in fandom. Obviously, your comment was wildly inappropriate, though I’m neither the one you should be apologizing to, nor the one who gets to offer you forgiveness. Your current behavior is also kind of weird and obsessive, honestly, and while I hope I answered your question, my recommendation would be to just let it go, and worry less about other people’s personal fandom preferences going forward. It’s a lot less stressful, trust me.