#This isn’t my best piece of art but I am proud of myself for finishing it

[kikikakapo]

Hi

vote joehills

it’ll be funny

[wind-becomes-lightning]

Obito and I

Ok this is so so silly and I've had the idea a while ago and just thought fuck it I'm going to do it for Obito week. yeah Uh, I don't know how to explain it.

Uchiha Obito and uh, me I guess

Rated G.

3178 words

Ao3 Link [x]

for @obito-week: always watching & free spot.

One afternoon Uchiha Obito appears in my room. [..] The man is all an Obito has to be, tall, broad, black haired, facial scars, weird eggplant coloured coat and all. He seems almost as shocked to see me as I am to see him. As if I’m also a figure that has just jumped out of a story book.

One afternoon Uchiha Obito appears in my room.

I just finished a philosophy session on the toilet, head full of ideas about where I could take my afternoon nap as I hear a little sound not unlike a big piece of plastic being sucked up into a vacuum cleaner. 

“The neighbours are at it again”, I curse to myself as I pull up the sweats I should have changed three days ago. There is still this white stain on it from where I dropped toothpaste and each time I see it I remind myself that I have to wash it, but I never do.

I feel grumpy as I walk back into the bedroom and almost drop my phone when there is Obito standing in front of me.

“Obito!” I almost yell.

The man is all an Obito has to be, tall, broad, black haired, facial scars, weird eggplant coloured coat and all. He seems almost as shocked to see me as I am to see him. As if I’m also a figure that has just jumped out of a story book.

With a shaking finger that has exceptionally perfectly applied violet nail polish on it that makes me wonder for a moment when the hell he has learned that and why the hell he can do it much better than me, he points at the pictures on my wall. His mouth opens and closes and then opens again.

 “Why?” It's the only thing that he seems to have the ability to say.

I follow his eyes to the art print he is pointing at, an especially great fanart that I once got during a request event. Obito is on it, hair dripping with water, tongue out and aimed at Kakashi in front of him, they are both half naked. An artwork I truly cherish, the first time I jumped up and down in my - this- room in the morning after some amazing artist fulfilled the art wishes that I could never fulfil myself.

Still, I must admit, that must be really weird to see for someone like Obito. I almost feel ashamed that he has to see something so private not only to myself but himself, as if I was a paparazzi taking pictures of him against his will. Half naked and with his best frenemy and all.

I shrug. “I like the ship.” I don’t know what else to tell him.

Maybe he thinks I’m mad. Probably he thinks I’m mad. Quite likely he thinks I’m mad. His eyes harden, the rinnegan in its incredibly unnatural colour peers into me. His mouth forms the word “ship”, but he lets his finger sink.

I wonder if this would be the right time to ask him. I step from one foot to another with insecurity. My hands feel sweaty. Well, it is not any day that a character from a book suddenly appears in front of you. This isn’t Inkheart. I didn’t read him into existence. Or did I? Who knows, maybe sitting on the toilet and thinking of naps triggered this sort of thing.

“Why are you in my bedroom?”. I finally find my courage. 

Obito stares as if it is an outrageous question. Then his face frowns and he waves frantically: “I just materialised here. I don’t even know where I am, who you are and why you have pictures of me hanging on your wall.”

I can’t help but be flattered. My own drawings of him are good enough to make him think they are pictures. Inside I'm giddy. I can’t wait to tell my tumblr friends about this.

“Are you stalking me?” He says, pointing again, another art with him and Kakashi, just that Yamato is with them too. A collaborative art I made with two of my tumblr friends that I am also personally very proud of. “That’s really creepy you know?!”

“Takes one to know one.” I have no mercy.

He clearly isn’t pleased. He steps away from my wall and inspects the computer in front of it. I assume he has never seen a computer before, especially not one with a double screen and light up keyboard and mouse setup  like any good Sims gamer should have. 

He rubs his chin.

“Electricity!” 

“It sure is,” I say and feel like I’m talking to one of my dead grandparents. 

“Electricity - good. Electricity - works - maybe.” He is thinking obviously, but apparently that has made his brain go back into caveman mode. 

Caveman mode. I chuckle to myself. 

“Bring me back!” he points at me again. “Whatever you did to get me here, make it go away.”

“I did not bring you here,” I shrug my shoulders again. “I don’t know where you were and how you got here, I just came here and you were there. Maybe you made a kamui mistake.”

I wonder if kamui was always connected to my bedroom and then my next thought is, if kamui was always connected to my bedroom, why didn’t Kakashi come through? I agree with myself that it would have been more fair if Kakashi had come through.

“How do you know about Kamui?!” He seems genuinely offended.

Well, there is nothing but forward, I think and let out a deep sigh. Having to have this conversation really wasn’t what I thought I would be doing when I got up in the morning. All I can do now is hope he takes the truth well enough not to jump at me. Even without his powers, Obito could probably crush me.

And while there were times in which I have declared on the internet that I want him to crush me, I would rather not right now. Especially not if there are pancakes for dinner.

“You are a fictional character, my man.” I say and pick up the Kakashi pillow on my bed and shake it a little. “From a book, you know? This is merchandise. I’m a fan.” I wave to the pictures and wiggle with the pillow again. 

A moment passes, then another. Both of Obito’s eyes are focused on my fluffy Kakashi pillow, a vein on his head pulsing dangerously. 

“Fictional?” he grumbles, his hand in a fist. 

I prepare myself to get crushed afterall. At least I would die with my head in his titties, which is, I decide, not so bad of a death. “Yes, fictional.”

He turns around and punches into my wooden desk so hard that the keyboard loses most of its keys and my graphic tablet tumbles down to the floor with a crash. 

Probably that means he isn’t taking it very well, I think to myself.

-

Obito can’t read books that are not written in Japanese I realise as I hand him the few light novels I have of the Naruto franchise. None have the manga pictures, but I have to assemble my keyboard again first before I can turn on my computer to show the manga to him.

Truly, I should have known that Obito can’t read English or German, why the hell would a character that was by all means made up by a Japanese man be able to read that? But then again I can communicate with him well enough without needing subtitles. This is all very strange.

“My name!” he yells and points at the page that he holds open. So he can read his own name. I feel like a proud mother.  “Am I in this story too?”

Lazily I take the book from him. “No, sorry to tell you that you are dead.”

His eyes go so wide that I fear another punch is coming so I say: “But in the heart of many of us fans you are always alive.” How cringe, but it is the truth.

“Are you stalking Kakashi even more than me?” Obito picks up the figure I have on my desk of Kakashi in his Anbu uniform and then also picks up my pillow from my bed weighing them both up and down. 

He seems surprisingly intrigued by the way Kakashi’s muscles are shown on the figure. 

“I like him the most,” I say. “He is my favourite character.”

Instinctively I hold my hand out to save my precious figure from slipping out of Obito’s hands. He already looks angry again, as if I have personally hurt him by having a character I would like more than him. 

Well, people with the best taste in ships, like me, have always known that Obito secretly is obsessed with Kakashi. After all that was the entire point of the story (I like having my own delusions.)

Finally I get my shit together and turn on the computer. My wallpaper is a rotation of many different wallpapers, but of course this moment that Obito sits right beside me the rotation choses a picture of him with Team Minato as a kid. I quickly open a browser window to hide it, but he has already seen it.

“I don’t remember we ever took a picture like this together,” he says with a frown. 

Right, he thinks the fanart are “pictures” of him. “It’s just art,” I say dismissively. “It’s not canon.”

His eyes narrow. 

“Ta-da!” I say and present him the coloured version of the Naruto manga.

Obito stares at the pages as I scroll around, not trusting him to know how the mouse works. I know that Konoha will eventually get computers too, but only after Obito’s death and even if they already had them, I wouldn’t trust his violent urges.

He stares as I scroll and scroll. Then finally, as if it took him 10 chapters to realise as much, he says: “Wait, I’m not the main character?”

-

The news that he is nothing more than a side character in his own life comes hard to Obito. I empathise with him, I too have severe main character syndrome while being an extra at best. Maybe that is why he finally stops looking so angry at me each time I say something. Trauma bonding over your insignificance.

“And you… like this story?” Obito says and he sounds as if it makes no sense to him that anyone would like a narrative in which he isn’t the main character.

I shrug, which I feel I have done a lot in the last few hours: “It has its moments.”

His eyes wander over the several pieces of memorabilia and fanart I have scattered around my bedroom and he nods his head. “You seem obsessed,” he notes.

“There are people worse than me,” I clarify, because I don’t want to accept the very real assessment that nonetheless makes me look bad. “At least I don’t use bots to vote in a popularity poll that literally doesn’t matter or send anon hate.

Obito blinks at me and the wheels behind his eyes are turning. I push his chair away from the desk so I can sit in front of my computer again and he just lets it happen. Surely the world he is from has chairs with wheels, I think to myself, or maybe Obito really had never seen anything but the inside of his cave.

He shakes his head in disbelief. “So there are more of you?”

“More of me?” I can’t shadow clone in this world, I think.

“People who enjoy these… drawings.” Obito snaps with his finger in the direction of the computer screen.

I laugh. I can’t help it. “God yes” I say and hold my stomach. “Millions. It is very popular actually, one could argue that it is one of if not the most famous shonen manga that has ever been popular. Not only Japan though, that is also in the west.”

His nose crinkles and I can feel another anger outburst incoming so I pick up my keyboard and hold it over the desk just so I don’t have to play puzzle all over again now that I have it put back together.

“And you all,” he waved with his finger, “are Kakashi stalkers?”

“Oh no, many are also your stalkers.” I reply and to prove it to him I open tumblr and push the screen into his face. 

“See? There are entire blogs that are dedicated to you. Personally, I think their hot takes can be a little weird, because in my head canon the reason for your personality shift is a deep rooted delusion with the world that is later fixed by giving you someone to believe in in Naruto and on top of that you are changed by the trust that Kakashi puts in you, a trust that you craved as a child but never got until the very end. Generally people hate the redemption through death type of storyline, but I feel like a self sacrifice fits you very well, at least from what you know before you lost yourself to the personality of Madara.”

His jaw swings open. I realise that I won’t ever convince him that I am not in fact obsessed if I keep talking like an obsessed person. 

I add: “Uh, that’s just literary analysis though, I don’t know you personally.” 

“Roll the tiny wheel,” Obito says and I assume he means to force me to scroll. 

Like always, tumblr does not disappoint and it takes me about 1.06 minutes to find a picture in which Obito is shirtless and posing. I blink looking at the thickness of his thighs and the large man titties showing on his chest. The artist was kind enough to put at least five fire emojis as a caption. I unashamedly press the like button.

“Who took that picture?” Obito says, outraged. “That is an invasion of privacy!”

I laugh. “Come on, you can’t tell me you don’t see that this is a drawing. You don’t look like this.” I gesture at his body form. 

Obito takes the mouse from me and I have to hold on to the cable so he doesn’t rip it out. He scrolls on. There are so many half naked pictures of him that have him posing or crying and I am very unhappy about my loss of mouse privileges because that means I can’t like them all to keep them for later.

“These people,” he gestures, “when they draw me like this. That means they like me?”

Now his eyes suddenly shine bright as if he is a kid again. It is very cute, though a little concerning that the prospect of someone really liking him makes him so very happy.

“Oh yes, they want to jump your bones.” I avoid mentioning that I am one of those people that generally wants to jump his bones. “They think you are hot shit.”

For the first time since he has literally appeared in my room Obito smiles with satisfaction. Then he moves the mouse and scrolls on to another fanart of him and Kakashi kissing. His eyes stay frozen on it, then he picks up the mouse and throws it against my screen.

-

Legs pressed against his body Obito sits on the floor in front of the door to my balcony. My monitor is not damaged and neither is my mouse I realise with relief while he murmurs behind me. 

“People just like the ship,” I try to explain. “They are usually not that serious about it. It is all in good fun.” I weigh my head. “Well unless it is on twitter because that’s just a warzone.”

I sit down next to him and can’t believe the absurdity of the situation. There he is, Uchiha Obito, the pride of the Uchiha clan, or, well the pride of Uchiha Madara, or well more like… the victim of Uchiha Madara’s pride of the Uchiha clan, and is gloomy because people in a world he doesn’t inhabit think he and his best frenemy also sometimes kissed. Truly the weirdest of turns of events.

“Sometimes you say such weird things.” Obito says into his knees. “I don’t even know what you mean.” He looks up at me. “I wonder if your definition of ship is different from mine.”

Probably not, I think, but probably yes at the same time. “You see, when people like two fictional characters that they think have chemistry, they often want them to end up together in the safe harbour of love. So we call it shipping.” I make it up on the spot and feel very confident that my explanation is correct. “Giving characters a happy ending is just very fulfilling. Or giving them a sad ending. Or first we hurt them then we make them happy. Or just making them suffer for love… everything really.”

“But Kakashi?”

“You have chemistry.” Undeniably.

“All we do is fight!” He looks at me from the side.

“Like I said,” I repeat, “You have chemistry.”

Obito sits up straight against the window of my balcony door. He puffs out his chest. “No, we really don’t.” He says it as if it was a fact. “You and that.. that art person are just the weird ones. I’m sure those that really like me would never think something as outrageous.”

“Maybe,” I say and shrug, “but it is very popular.”

—

I feel like a teacher in the following hour as I explain to Obito what Ao3 is, how it works, how to search for something and how it clearly shows that one of the most popular ships have him and Kakashi paired up. Clearly, I am not the weirdo here in this world and I want him to accept that.

While he keeps scrolling on, now much more gentle with the mouse, I sit on my bed and turn pages in a book that I’m pretending to read while I watch him closely.

Sometimes he sighs. “That’s not true” or “I would not say that” or “That’s disgusting” and I have to hold myself back to stand behind him to see what things warrant such reactions.

“These people”, he gestures to the monitor, “all know so much about my life. More than I have ever told anyone.”

I sigh and turn a page in my book I’m not reading. “That is because we all know your story.”

“Because I am a fictional character.” Obito sounded exasperated.

“Because you are a fictional character,” I confirm.

“But thi-, this is like you are watching me at all times,” he whines and waves with his arms again. “Like every little of my interactions with others is analysed and turned into writing. I feel rather violated.”

I would apologise for the fandom, but it is not like we were aware that Obito would be a sentient being that could appear out of the story at the blink of an eye as if inkheart was real. I can’t help but feel sorry for him though, this day was a lot to take in. “I guess we should eventually find out how to get you back where you belong.” But for that I first need to find out how he got to me of all people.

-

bonus doodles that a friend made while I was reading the story to them:

[ameliterature]

Writer's Block Cont. (AnderPerry ficlet)

Continuation of Writer's Block

It was a breezy evening downtown and Todd hasn't been at the Coffee Shop since he'd kissed Neil. For obvious reasons, this made the coffee shop barista extremely worried.

"Why the long face?" Charlie asked. He propped himself by the counter beside his brooding friend. Charlie was one of Neil's best friends and the actual manager/owner of the coffee shop (this way he could play his saxophone every Friday night without any objections).

"Todd... He hasn't been here in three days, Charlie, and he's almost always here." Neil buried his face more onto the linoleum counter.

"Oh Todd, ah yes, your big time author-crush-person." Charlie recalls Neil always gushing about him during his break time. He always insisted making all of Todd's orders too. "I mean, today could just be another busy day for him. I'm sure he doesn't necessarily have a reason not to go here." He chuckled.

Neil fell silent.

"... Neiiiilll? What did you do?" Charlie glares at his direction. "Why do you think Todd Anderson wouldn't go here for three days straight?"

Neil fiddled with his thumbs. "I-- I may have... maybe- uh... k-kissed him last weekend."

"YOU WHAT?!" Charlie blurted out, alarming some of the customers and their other barista, Meeks. Unlike Charlie, Meeks was already aware of this situation but he didn't exactly want to stop making his latte art at the moment.

"SHHHH, pipe it down, Charlie- I... Okay, so the other day uh..." Neil huffed before pulling Charlie into the back office to talk more privately-- naturally leaving Meeks in charge.

"Details, Perry, I. NEED. DETAILS." Charlie shook Neil by his shoulders.

"Okay, okay! I'm getting to it-" Neil rattled Charlie off of him. "So- The other day when I was closing up shop for you, Todd was the only one left and- well, long story short- He needed kissing experience for his book and I gave it to him and now I think it was a mistake and he is most likely avoiding me." Neil buried his face into his hands this time. He whined as Charlie comforts him with a pat on his slouched back.

"Neil- Come on! I'm sure he's just shy and all. Hey maybe you gave him the wrong phone number- remember that time when you sent me the wrong one-"

"OH MY GOD-- THAT'S IT-" Neil face-palmed.

"What?"

"I FORGOT TO GIVE HIM MY NUMBER--" Neil sounded both relieved and hysterical. "Of course he wouldn't just come back here- He couldn't just... talk to me in person after what I did- and- and..." Neil sunk to the floor.

Charlie looked down at his distraught friend. "Who am I kidding, Charlie... I ruined it... The one time I got to meet my favorite author and I blew it by kissing him."

"You sure that's blowing it? I'd say it was the best thing you could possibly get from any famous-person-interaction." Charlie smiled, trying to pick up Neil from the ground.

"Just let me die in peace." Neil says to the cold floor. "That kiss might've been the first and last time I ever got to know Todd Anderson in person and I didn't even ask about his other books. He probably thinks I'm just a floozy."

Just as Charlie was about to complain about Neil's focus on Todd's writing than Todd's kiss, someone knocks on the door.

Meeks opens the door to see Neil lifting his head from the floor with tears in his eyes while Charlie is grabbing his arm.

"Uh.. Neil, there's a guy looking for you. He said his name's Todd Ander-"

Neil instantly perks up and immediately bolts to the counter.

When Neil arrives by the cash register, he sees the same dark-blonde author he kissed mere days ago. Todd had eye bags yet his expression was one of breathless excitement. Still beautiful to Neil's eyes.

"T-Todd..." Neil greeted him.

"Neil... When... When do you get off work?" Todd asked fervently yet it was polite to Neil's eyes. "I... I need to talk to you about something."

Just as Neil was about to say 'Around 10pm' Charlie appears from behind him.

"Thank you for your work, Mr. Perry! I see you're done with your shift for the day! I'll see you tomorrow!" Charlie beamed, making quick eye contact with both Neil and Todd. Neil picked up on what Charlie implied and immediately took off his apron.

After a short while, Todd guided Neil to his car parked right outside the coffee shop. "D-Do you mind going with me to my apartment?"

It was a non-question for Neil. As much as he wanted to scream from the rooftops and YAWP in excitement, he kept his composure and followed Todd. "Sure, I'd love to."

The drive to Todd's apartment was silent and short. Todd lived incredibly close to the coffee shop and this fact made Neil grow even more fanboy-y. Oh my god Oh my god Oh my god.

He wanted to respect Todd's privacy so he purposefully didn't take note of the floor number or the apartment number before he entered Todd's home. (In turn, he kept his eyes on Todd the whole time).

As they entered the apartment, Neil could only stare at how neat Todd's living space was. It wasn't exactly neat as it was mostly barren. The most "decoration" you could find was Todd's various bookshelves. A good portion of the area was his own books while the rest were a plethora of Classics and collections of multiple pieces of literature. Todd was a well-read author after all.

"D-did you want anything to drink? Unfortunately the coffee I have here isn't as good as the ones you make so-"

"Wait, Todd... I'm- I'm sorry for what I did... If I made you feel uncomfortable. I- I was worried the past few days-"

"Huh, What- You're sorry?" Todd, bewildered by Neil's apology, let out a chuckle. "Neil, if anything, you helped me, remember?"

Neil looked at him with an intrigued look.

Just then, Todd took Neil's hand and led him to his office. Unlike his perfectly neat living room and kitchen area, Todd's office was a chaotic room full of papers and notebooks. In the back part facing away from the windows was a desk with a computer, multiple stacks of papers (and paper balls), and emptied out paper cups marked on the inside with coffee stains.

"Our little uh- field research actually got me out of my writer's block and I've been writing my book like crazy for the past three days." Todd confessed. "I'm basically almost done with it."

"Wait- Three days?" Neil wheezed. He didn't think Todd could get even more impressive than he already was. "My kiss got you to finish your newest book in three days?!"

"Well... yeah-" Todd scratched the back of his head in humility. "Can't say I've ever done that before. It'll need a shitload of editing and proof reading perhaps, but it's mostly done. Thanks to you."

Neil didn't know how to respond to Todd's words. Neil's favorite author, the person he's been following for several years now, was inspired by his kiss, and finished an entire book in THREE DAYS.

"Todd- I... F-from my kiss?"

"Yes. Well of course it was also the caffeine, but yeah mostly your kiss. I just wanted to personally thank you for getting me through one of my toughest works yet." Todd sat by his desk, pulling up some of the papers he already printed.

Neil walked up to his side, staring at the tentative manuscript- one Todd's editor has yet to even see. (Cameron was not gonna have an easy time).

"Did you want to read it?" Todd asked, instantly making Neil swoon.

"Todd, you're gonna kill me- OF COURSE I'D LOVE TO READ IT-" Neil gushed, looking at both the papers and a blushing Todd.

Neil held the loosely bound papers in his hands, then back at Todd who looked incredibly proud of himself and yet still very reserved.

Neil couldn't tell if he was looking at Todd as an author anymore by how close he was this time. Their arms were brushing against each other, the sound and smell of papers filled the room, Todd was so close.

Neil carefully places the manuscript down by the table. "Before I read it... do you mind if... If I asked you something?"

Todd blinked a couple of times before nodding. "S-sure."

"Do... Do you think it's weird that I... kissed you? I know I said I was helping you for research but... I think a part of me did it because I really liked you. And I'm not sure if it's because I really admire you for your work or if I think you were as beautiful that night as you are now."

Todd looked at him, flustered and speechless. "Y-you sure do know exactly what you want to say..."

"Yeah- I'm sorry."

"And I'm envious of that." Todd responded. Not that Neil needed another reason to gush, but Todd being envious of him is another strike for Neil's humility.

"Usually, when I write my books-- the surrealist ones, they're usually the ones so weird and detached from reality, I usually didn't need to put myself into the protagonists' shoes. But with this book, a book where it's a journey of romance and discovery, I didn't think I'd ever find the right words to describe how the character felt, let alone myself."

"So my kiss gave you existential clarity?" Neil chuckled softly.

"For a short while, yes. I'm all out of it, currently. It's been a draining past few days." Todd leaned back by his office chair.

Neil smirked at him with allurement. "I mean, I'm here. I wouldn't mind giving you a refresher."

Todd raised his eyes at him, blushing even more. "I-"

"I'm just kidding- relax. I'll only kiss you when you want me to. If you ever need anymore field research, that is. I wouldn't mind being your primary source."

Todd bit his lip, gazing upon Neil as he sat over his desk nonchalantly.

"W-what if... say, I wanted a kiss for other reasons?" Todd's voice was like a mumble.

"Excuse me?" Neil felt like he was playing the most intense game of chess with their interaction.

"Like, what if- I thought you looked really handsome right now and I wanted to kiss you, is that a good enough reason to ask for a kiss?"

Neil was enthralled by this interaction. Was it Todd being forward? Or was it his lack of sleep making him this way.

"I... Yes... That's a great reason, actually."

"So... to answer your question earlier: I didn't think it's weird that you kissed me because, right now, another kiss wouldn't seem to bad. And this time, I won't need it for a book."

Todd stood up to meet Neil at eye level, catching him by surprise.

"You're still gonna have to credit me for that book- do you know about royalties-" Neil joked before Todd planted a kiss on him.

Their second kiss was full of small bits of laughter before it turned into something more. It was no longer about Todd's lack of experience or motivation to write, nor was it Neil's admiration as a fan anymore. It was in their second kiss they realized the person they were kissing would be someone to rid them of their woes and inspire them for the rest of their lives.

Aside from that, Todd's career as an author had a new component to it, the skill to garner inspiration in the form of kisses from Neil Perry.

[just-the-hiddles]

Writer’s Spotlight | Nildespirandum

This week I am spotlighting one of my favorite writers, @nildespirandum​!  She is the Adam writer that made me both scared and brave enough to write Adam myself.  She is the weaver of worlds, the creator of characters so real you think they are sitting next to you.  Smart, funny, and an amazing writer!

Catch all of Nildespirandum’s stories here.

What other names do you want people to call you?

I use Misreall on AO3.

How long have you been writing fic?

I am on this current round for about four years, but I did write before though that was a decade ago.

What fandoms and/or ships do you write?

Tom Hiddleston characters, though not RPF.  Primarily Loki, but I have written for Thomas Sharpe, Adam from Only Lovers Left Alive, and Conrad from Kong: Skull Island.  For all of them I have written OFCs.

How did you get started writing fic?

I had ideas for a fics for a while, but it wasn't until I started commenting and then talking to @caffiend-queen that I decided it was time to do something about it.

Story Recommendations

Which of your stories are your favorite?

I hate this question, but if I had to pick it would be the cycle of stories called Loki and Nora's Infinity Stone Playlist, both because it is my first, and because I think the relationship between the characters - not just Loki and Nora, but the cast that has build up around them - allows me to tell so many tales.

Which story are you most proud of?

Either Perfection - my Crimson Peak AU, or Reigning in Hel - A JotunLoki series.

Which of your stories do you think is the most underrated?

Probably At Hel's Edge, which is a historical mash-up of MCU Loki, with MythLoki.  The people who read it loved, it but it never found much of an audience.  Possibly because of the style I wrote it in, or maybe because the MCULoki character was a bit abstract from his origin.  But I am very, very lucky that it is getting a second life as a Webtoon drawn by @rauko-art, who is incredibly gifted and has worked so hard to make something really beautiful.

Someone is new to reading your stories, which story/stories should they read first?

For Loki, the Infinity Stone Playlist.  Otherwise, maybe Perfection.

Which story did you do the most research for?

Perfection.  I can tell you how much a yard of silk cost in 1910, both in England and the US.  

Which story was the easiest to write?

Probably my Incubus Loki first series.  It was so over the top and goofy that it was effortless.  Rapacity - my vampire Loki story - is also quite easy.  There may be a trend here.

The Writing Process

What is your favorite part of writing?

To quote Dorothy Parker, "I hate writing, but I love having written."  With that said, I love the moment when I am lost in the process, and the characters are narrating and I am taking dictation.  

What is your least favorite part?

Editing, which is probably why I hardly ever do it.  That said, I am fine editing other people's work.  

Describe your style in 1 to 2 sentences.

Breezily conversational when it isn't breaking your heart.

Who are some of your writing idols and/or influences?

I don't have time, and you certainly wouldn't have the patience, for my full list but a few key choices are Jane Austen, Anthony Bourdain, Ian Shoales, Alexander Dumas, the Brothers Grimm, Neil Gaiman, Louisa May Alcott, Balzac, Mary Roach, Bebe Moore Campbell, Douglas Adams.  But all of that said it was probably Howard Pyle, the D'aulaires, Zilpha Keatley Snyder, Winifred Madison, and Ruth Chew whose books I read over and over to the point of them falling apart are probably the writers who made me, not only on the page, but in life.

What programs do you use to write and/or edit?

I do all of my writing and editing in Google docs.   I'm a Luddite at heart.

Are you a plotter or a pantser?

A pantser.  I might have some of a story in mind when I start, but usually I start with an image and let fly.  The entirety of my Bottom of the Hourglass story came from my seeing a folded bookcase leaning against a basement door.

Do you write RPF or not?

Years ago I wrote an RPF as a gift for a friend. For the future, I never say never.

Who is your favorite character to write and why?

Loki.  Loki is the gift that keeps on giving.  While I could flippantly say that all of that emotional and mental trauma is fic writer catnip - and I wouldn't be lying - there is so much more.  He is a character of such wit and imagination, powerful, funny, wise, and a complete idiot.  The Trickster is such brilliant architype, playing both sides of the fence, fooling and being fooled, capable of great good and true evil.  He is vastly entertaining, and achingly sympathetic.  I can go on, but I will spare you.

What do you think are your writing strengths?

Dialogue, for one.  I am proud that if you read the dialogue alone from my stories you can tell who each character is, that they all have a distinct voice.

What do you struggle with?

Plot.  I get so very bored with plot.  

Favorite Trope?

That's like being asked to pick a favorite anything, I can't do it.  Ok, fine, enemies to lovers.

Favorite word to use?

Delightful.  Or Really.

What is the best piece of writing advice you have heard?

Make time for your writing.  Even when you think you can't.

What would you say to a new fanfic writer starting out?

Don't be afraid, don't shrink and hide and diminish yourself, you have to be your own first, best audience.  Also, always remember, art doesn't apologize and neither should you, as long as you feel you have given the best you can at any given time - which will not always be the same, EVERYONE has off days - then be proud of having written, of having added to the world.

What is a random bit of research you have not managed to work into a fic yet?

I did so much research on boats and ship to ship combat for my pirate story that I will never use all of it.  Generally I am pretty efficient with my research, mostly because I already have a brainful of useless knowledge that I am still trying to make pay off.

What is your favorite random detail from one of your stories?

I love that in the later Infinity Stone Playlist stories Loki's various lounging robes have magical pockets that always produce cookies.  

Any goals or WIPs you want to share?

I am determined to finish both The Frost Queen and The Tales of the Golden Horn this spring, and I have decided I am going to commit to the sequel to Perfection about Thomas and Alice's grandson that I have had in mind since I finished their story.

This or That

Fluff AND Angst

Smut AND Fluff

Reader or OC

One shot or Series

Canon Divergent AND AU

Coffee or Tea

Sweet or Savory

Anything else you want to say or share? 

There is a tendency in fandom these days to see things that do not have a moral dimension as being good or bad, to only look at the most extreme edges of things and pass judgement on the whole.  Life is hard enough, let people enjoy things.  

Until next week!

[the-voltage-diaries]

Το Βόρειο Αστέρι μου - Lucifer x Diavolo

AO3 Link

Το Βόρειο Αστέρι μου: Greek for ‘My Polar Star’

Word Count: 1859

A/N: I don’t know what this is. All I know is that @simpingw0lfi3​​​​​​​ refused to do it, so I did. Of course, please don’t expect this to be perfect because... it really isn’t. 

Vote of thanks: @akaiiro-yume​​​​​ for checking and correcting all the grammatical fuck ups I did, making sure I didn’t stop writing this halfway and going through any mental breakdown I might have had instead for me. And, of course, @some-ikemen-snob​​​​​ for making sure this SCREAMED Lucifer energy this way and that. only for now, but ily both.

Devildom 14th February, 20XX Saturday, 7:57 PM

Dear Diary,

      I suppose I've never written a journal entry such as this in the past, for I haven't found either the desire or the will to task myself with writing my thoughts down in a manner wherein I speak to an inanimate object. That said, I have been told writing is, in a manner of speaking, therapeutic, and I believe I could do with some of that right now. It would be false to assume I don’t still harbour any inhibitions towards using my time in this manner, especially when I'd much rather be by Diavolo’s side. The very same Diavolo who, as a matter of fact, happens to be the subject of this writing session today. Strangely enough, and if I recall correctly, he was also the one who introduced - which is putting it rather mildly - me to the “art” of journal entries. I admit, I haven’t given this activity the kind of gravity which was probably expected out of me, but then again, today is a little different from the rest. I'm not entirely certain as to where to begin, but I do believe I have been told in situations like these, one should do whatever... feels right.

      Diavolo is... well, where do I even begin? He is the future of Devildom, as a few might call it - myself included. While he does appear to be quite the cheerful and at times careless lord, it’d be a lie to deny that he is just as wise and compassionate underneath that wave of buoyancy radiating off of him. Honest to a fault, but with his moral compass always pointing towards the best interest of those around him. I’ll admit, sometimes it proves to be rather difficult to believe that he indeed is a demon. It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to compare him to the Polaris considering he does quite radiate the charisma from himself, shining admirably amidst a dark sea of onlookers. While in name he rules over all the demons in the land of Devildom, the right set of eyes won’t take too long to deduce the eloquence with which his fingers reach out to the soul of every single resident of the land, holding them together better than gravity ever bound humans to the earth. 

      Saying that is all there is to him would be a lie whiter than the wet snow, making its way to the tips of my fingers and sliding off gently onto this page. That, of course, doesn’t mean describing how I feel towards him is no herculean task. There are some cases when a language -  no matter the plethora of vocabulary it offers - just isn’t sufficient enough, and this certainly is one of those cases. For the time being, let’s just owe my lack of articulacy to the bond of mutual respect and trust Diavolo and I share, built over centuries upon centuries, braving the ravages of time, and even perhaps the less than pleasing antics my brothers tend to pull. But while the impression the ruler of all demons and I tend to emit may seem to be distanced by a careful degree of professionalism, I don’t believe anybody knows that that might not be the case. Even Diavolo himself. Doesn’t come as a surprise, really, for they simply can’t know.

      Why do I believe that to not be the case, then? Well, I would wonder why I felt so strongly about it had I not known the reason myself. The very same reason which is now a secret so surreptitious that I can’t help but consider burning this piece of paper once I finish writing to ensure it is never revealed to another set of eyes. Such dastardly is the nature of this emotion, tricking one into its delusive warmth, encompassing them with the belief that nothing truly is impossible, that what they feel might just be true and meaningful enough to be returned by the other they feel for, only to cackle with glee and turn away when the reality doesn’t match the fantasy it was believed to turn out to be. The very same emotion which in layman’s terms is apparently called... love.

      I’m not entirely certain I understand the extent of its exquisite existence myself, to be truthful. All I know is no matter how intensely I try to shut the door on its escaping fumes, it turns futile the second I lay my eyes on the man in question. While the rest of the known universe sees an omnipotent leader binding everyone together, making them sing the same tune in harmony, I see what I can only consider an anchor, grounding me, making it so that I can’t ever fall into the abyss of the darkness that breathes inside of me and float away. He is the quintessence of the best of what the world has to offer, with his golden eyes sparkling like stardust, weaving their ever-lasting magic into the hearts of whoever they come across - be it human, or demon, or angel - wrapping them in their never-ending warmth, letting them sink into the depths of benevolence they promise. His hair are the cerise of a raging inferno, sheltering beneath their canopy a quick, sensible, erudite mind. His smile is but a warm culmination of everything optimistic and positive, like a flame inviting moths to it, reaching out to give their innermost yearnings a hand to grab on to and never let go. Simply divine. And this is where the paths diverge, I suppose.

      They see a to-be Demon King, I see Diavolo.

      But alas, love is a fickle mistress. Getting too lost in the charm of her alluring arms will only result in a doom of them wrapping around your neck, enticing, until you realise their hold is tightening. Not to hold on, but to suffocate. I might have gotten so lost in that fiery gaze that I didn’t notice it start to crawl along my skin, leaving a charred, burnt path in its wake. The very anchor which I believed to be the one to ground me and hold me close etched itself deeper into the oceanic floor of delirium, drowning me. The threads of his stardust wrapped themselves around me and clutched hard enough to strangle. Before I knew it, the symphony of something meaningful became the cacophony of a nightmare.

      This red thread strung through itself earlier today the series of events I’d rather forget. I’ve known how I feel towards Diavolo for a while now, and I had been searching for an opportunity to come clean and let him know about it for the last few days. Not to say I hadn’t gotten said opportunities at all, but one could owe it to me being too prideful to admit I was finally opening up to the idea of accepting feelings and... emotions. Around that time was when Solomon let slip a few details about the significance of Valentine’s day in the human world as an annual occurrence to celebrate romantic love, friendship, and admiration, and with enough persistence, Asmodeus managed to convince Diavolo to declare the day as an official holiday. Just a few hours ago I walked along the empty hallways to Diavolo’s office, knowing him, Barbatos and I to be the only ones in the building, still choosing work over any form of inactivity. By then, I had talked myself into finally telling the most powerful of all demons about the feelings I harboured towards him. I am a little embarrassed to admit that I was indeed a tad hopeful, wishing for the feelings to be returned. Once I reached the door to his private office, my hand settled above the smooth hardwood to give it a knock. And that’s when I noticed that the door was already slightly ajar. I heard a voice inside, other than Diavolo’s, and I took the liberty to glance inside, only for my hopes to come crashing down when the realisation struck me: I shouldn’t have done that.

      Inside his office, Diavolo sat in his seat with his mouth pressed against another, a hand trailing across the small face with dark green locks framing it with elegance while the other held on to the person’s waist, pulling him closer. My eyes widened when the smaller man of the two let out a muffled whimper, perched on Diavolo’s lap. Barbatos. I felt my heart squeeze out a pained croak at the sight, and even though every single nerve in my body begged me to move away and forget I ever saw anything, my legs didn’t move. They stayed glued to their spot on the floor even as I felt it crumble beneath my feet, just the way my eyes stayed on Diavolo. My lip trembled with a longing I never thought I’d experience when Barbatos intertwined his fingers with Diavolo’s, smiling into the kiss they shared, like the perfect harmony which was always meant to be. It was when Diavolo broke the kiss, eyes meeting the other’s and whispers of love and confessions floating across the room until they settled on my ears, that I finally felt the mask crack. The facade I had worked on for centuries to lay the foundation of crumbled as my fists clenched, letting myself have a moment of weakness when a lone tear of frustration, delay, anger, and self loathing dripped down my cheek. I looked up at the ceiling, a voiceless laugh tumbling across my lips at the cognisance that the Polaris I was reaching out for, shining proud in the middle of a dark, cloudless sky, was beyond my reach, and... never supposed to be mine. How far I could stretch, how willing were my fingers to make one last attempt to touch it’s light and bask in it - all of that didn’t matter anymore.

      I exhaled a shaky breath, blinking once as I tucked away whatever it is I was going to tell Diavolo in some corner of my mind, crushing the key with a hard snap of my fingers. My eyes found Barbatos again, glazing over with a heartfelt wish for him to find his happiness, at least. It was with one last aching smile towards Diavolo and a euphoric laugh spilling from Barbatos’ lips that I turned on my heel, shaking my head at the fate I was handed. Needless to say, I hold no malice towards either of them - they’re both precious to me, as much as I dislike admitting it.

      I believe I have shared more than what was required, and I shall burn this piece of paper lest anyone finds it. One might call it wishful thinking on my part, but I do pray that watching the last signs of anything I harbour towards the one who wasn’t meant to be mine from the start burn as the embers of the fire consume it whole makes me put a lid on my feelings once and for all, for they were never supposed matter. They weren’t supposed to exist to begin with.

      After all, only a prince deserves a fairy-tale with a happy ending, and I am no prince.

Lucifer.

[crystalgirl259]

The Flame and the Dragon Chapter 32

Chapter 32: The Art Of The Dress

Kai gulped under her stare as Harumi grabbed his wrist, and yanked him forward. They had to get Kai ready for the ball tonight. She took in the teen's messy hair, mud and slush caked riding boots and dirt-splattered riding clothes. He had just taken Flame for a quick walk around the castle grounds with Ronin when Harumi suddenly dragged him away and Ronin took Flame back to the stables. Kai was seriously confused. The ball was not until tonight, so he didn't know why he needed to get ready so early.

Harumi insisted that her absolute mess and they had less than six hours to get him ready.

With a struggle, Harumi managed to drag the stubborn teen inside. Kai looked over his shoulder at the troll for help, but Ronin just threw his hands up in defense and chuckled nervously. He couldn't save the brunette from his fate. Harumi scared Ronin more than Kai did. The harpy ordered him upstairs. Echo had put in too much work into this for Kai to show up looking horrible. Kai tried desperately to pry Harumi's hand on his wrist, fearful of his destination, but she shoved him into his room and shut the door.

Kai stumbled in his haste but regained his footing as he blinked at the chaos circling around him.

Pixal and Tox were both giggling with mischievous smiles while they set up the changing wall, Pixal holding a plethora of bathing supplies in her arms. Tox was in the joint bathroom preparing a large tub with dozens of bubbles gurgling over the rims like a cauldron. Griffin tapped his foot impatiently, holding a pile of clothing covered in red silk Kai assumed was his clothing. Jay, Echo, and Nelson set up a changing wall and Neuro sighed in the corner with his hand buried in his greying hair.

When they heard Kai stumble into the room their eyes turned to him.

Jay, Echo, and Nelson immediately sat on the bed. Jay and Neuro had sympathetic smiles on their faces while Nelson was trying hard to laugh. Echo crossed his arms over his chest with a wide grin on his face. Griffin's face twisted to a wicked smirk. The combination of looks sent a shiver down Kai's spine and he took a wary step back only to bump into Harumi, who was perched at the door with her arms poised to catch him. Her grin made Kai gulp and he turned around only to come face to face with Tox and Pixal.

The normally sweet girls both sported, devilish smiles, like giddy school girls with a new doll.

That realization made Kai wish he could sink into the floor.

"Why are you all looking at me like that?" He gulped, unsure if he truly wanted an answer to that question. He tried to take a hesitant step to the left, but Tox slithered to stop him. He faked right and waited for Tox to move, then went left. Too late he realized his mistake. Kai screeched when Harumi pounced from behind him and Kai was pinned by her strong grip before he could blink.

"What?! Put me down!" Kai demanded thrashing his arms and legs, stunned that Harumi managed to keep such a firm grip on his upper body.

"Oh no you don't," She taunted. "You're not going anywhere, we're going to scrub you from head to toe." She laughed as she dragged Kai towards the bath, but the brunette dugs his heels into the floor and tried to grab anything within reach to slow down his inevitable fate. He managed to free one of his arms from Harumi's grip, but Pixal grabbed his legs and Tox grabbed his wrists. The three women laughed and dragged him towards the washroom, ignoring Kai's rants and protests.

Kai flashed a pleading look over his shoulder, but the boys gave him the same fearful but sympathetic smile Ronin did.

"Sorry firecracker, we're sitting this one out," Jay smirked as he threw his hands up.

"W-W-W-Wait!" Kai pleaded, gripping onto the rim of the bathroom door with his free fingers, holding on firmly as the girls tried to pull him off. His nails scratched off chunks of wood when they finally ripped him off. Harumi shut the door and stripped him of his coat. A wicked gleam covered the three girl's faces.

"Don't worry, Kai, when we're done with you Cole won't be able to keep his hands off you!" Tox grinned wickedly. Kai gulped and backed into a corner before the three giggling ladies descended upon him. The girls had stripped Kai of his clothing faster than he could blink and shoved him backward into the tub of water sending a flood over the rim. Before he could protest, Harumi uplifted a basin of water over his head, drenching him. She then began attacking his hair with soap and her long nails.

"GET YOUR DAMN CLAWS OFF ME, YOU SHARP TALONED HARPY! I CAN SCRUB MYSELF!" Kai screamed a retort and shot to his feet, furious. He and Harumi exchanged glares but the older woman was adamant.

"THAT'S ENOUGH OUT OF YOU!" She scolded, harshly, and forced Kai back down by pushing his shoulders, surprising Kai with her strength. She shoved him under the water then hoisted him back up by his shoulders. Kai coughed and wheezed at soapy water filled his mouth, and released an animalistic growl but Harumi held him firmly by his shoulders while he lashed in the tub. Tox and Pixal then attacked every inch of his body with soap, scrub brushes, and a loofah sponge.

They battled the flailing limbs and the bathwater spraying all over them and the chamber floor.

"Hold still!" Harumi thundered, tightening her grip on one hand as she used the other to scrub Kai's back and shoulders

"Ow, stop that, Harumi, you're choking me!" Kai screeched, furiously. He tried to spray her with water to get her to let go, but missed and hit Pixal instead. Pixal shrieked as she was sprayed when she tried to scrub his hair.

"I've only got your shoulders, now stop that!" Harumi snapped. Tox shrieked rinsing her scrub brush in one of the basins then drowned it in more soap.

"My God, Kai, did you bathe at all this week? You're covered in grime!"

"No, I'm not!" Kai howled, insulted.

"The hell you aren't, I could grow Shade hundreds of ingredients in the muck I scrubbed off you!" Tox protested, returning to her crusade to rid the teen skin of any dirt. Kai wanted to insult them back, but he screamed in pain as a wave of soap fell into his face and stung his eyes.

"Ow! Pixal! Get that out of my face, you're getting soap in my eyes!"

"I wouldn't if you'd hold still!" She snapped, furiously attacking the floppy mane of brown hair. "My God you have so much hair! Tox, get me another basin! I'll need to wash this twice."

"The hell you are!" Kai protested angrily but Harumi dunked him under the warm, sudsy water and hauled him up for Pixal to scrub at his hair again. Kai thrashed furiously like a caged wild animal.

"This is worse than drowning in a frozen lake!" He cried as he thrashed his limbs, causing Harumi's grip to falter, but she quickly recovered.

"Harumi, don't let him go or he'll cause havoc!" Tox shrieked, concerned, grabbing another basin of water and dumped it over Kai's head riding his hair and upper body of soap, but it only worsened his already foul mood.

"Just wait until I get out of this you bitch!" Kai warned as Tox drained the bath and Pixal kept dumping water over him to remove the soap and shut him up...

****************

Cole heaved himself out of his private bathtub the second he heard the door to his room slam open. Water pooled at his feet and his heavy wings shook violently hoping to free the waterlogged limbs from the heavy water weighing them down. He ran a hand through his damp hair spreading raindrops everywhere before grabbing a towel and proceeded to dry himself as best he could. Once dry, he let his damp wings hang loose and wrapped the towel around his waist.

When he entered his joint bedroom, he found Ronin sitting on his bed about to fall over in his half-conscious state.

The boy jumped back to life when Griffin entered, dragging Jay, Echo, and Nelson behind him.

"You're not dressed yet?" Griffin shrieked. "What is wrong with you people? How am I supposed to make alterations if none of you try your clothes on?"

"Calm down, Griffin, there's still plenty of time," Cole snapped, drying his hair, while Ronin helped him dry off his heavy wings. Once that was done, Ronin threw the towels over the chairs and handed him the neat pile of clothing Griffin had laid out for him. Cole grabbed the breeches off the top and disappeared behind the wall while Ronin turned to his companions.

"Why are you three here again?" He blinked. "I thought you were supposed to be helping Kai and fixing up the ballroom?"

"The Ballroom's done," Echo boasted, thrusting his chest forward proudly. "Shade is just setting up the food right now, and I personally made sure everything is perfect!" The boy flashed a triumphant smile.

"You didn't go overboard did you?" Cole asked, coming out from behind the wall, and look at the rest of the clothes. "Could you help me out here, Ronin? You need three people to put this thing on." He asked and Ronin nodded. He helped his lord to the ties and buttons on the difficult outfit Griffin had concocted.

"No, I didn't," Echo answered with a proud glint in his eyes. "This is my far my grandest work!"

"I helped!" Jay smiled, wrapping his arms around Echo's waist, while Nelson laughed at his enthusiasm. Griffin scowled at their distraction as he thrust three sets of clothes into their arms and forcibly propelled them all into the bathroom. "It's time to get dressed!" He exclaimed as he shut the door and left the boys to change before turning to Ronin and the prince. "Are you two finished yet? Ronin needs to get dressed too!"

"I'm going as fast as I can! This thing has knots that have knots!" Ronin complained standing on his toes to meet Cole's taller height and snap the chains on the front in place.

"It isn't that bad," Griffin protested, sitting cross-legged on the bed, waiting impatiently for them to finish.

"This thing has at least six pieces!" Cole snapped.

"So what? It looks brilliant, doesn't it? Besides Kai's is worse."

"I believe it, but he's right you look brilliant! Kai's going to be speechless." Ronin sighed when he finished buttoning Cole's top. Cole smiled and spun around in front of the full-body mirror to test his new clothes from all angles. His ballroom outfit, which consisted of a golden vest over a white dress shirt with a white kerchief, black dress pants trimmed with gold, and a stunning black ballroom tailcoat trimmed with gold. Cole had also tied his shaggy black hair into a ponytail adorned with a silky black ribbon.

"I'll admit it, I didn't think it was possible, but Griffin's outdone himself." He beamed with pride. "Hopefully, it'll be enough to convince my flame," Cole mumbled to himself.

"Tonight he'll be yours." Ronin corrected earning him a confused look from the prince. "We all know what you're thinking, Cole, we wouldn't be a good staff if we didn't know what our prince was thinking! You have nothing to worry about." He added with a smile.

"I hope you're right, I know Kai's answer, but there's still a nagging disbelief that's there." Cole smiled, mentally scolding himself for doubting his staff's loyalty. His sharp claws ran through his bangs.

"Don't be nervous, Kai feels the same way about you, even if he's not ready to admit it out loud just yet, and everyone knows how you feel about him." Ronin reassured him and that made Cole smile.

"Alright, you, time to get you changed." The tailor insisted as he dragged the troll away. Before Ronin could blink, he had been thrown into the same room as his friends, stripped and redressed in a new outfit. Ronin groaned as he looked over his outfit. He knew it was rude to complain and he should be grateful but Griffin had decked him out in formfitting black pants with a pair of spiked-heeled ankle boots, and a shirt made of a smooth black material that was open in the back, but the bottom billowed over his hips.

There were no sleeves, instead, the top material was held with a double ring that hung loosely about his neck.

Long fingerless black gloves with rubies over the back of the hands climbed up his arms, held to the collar of the shirt by gold chains. It was a comfortable outfit, but Ronin had grown so used to lose clothing that covered everything but his hands and head that wearing form-fitting clothing that showed even bits and pieces of his skin made him feel exposed. Echo thought he looked like a girl as he took in his own outfit. They consisted of light brown, form-fitting pants and a white long tunic that was also turtle necked but pillowed almost like a dress near the bottom.

Long black gloves with wide ends that curved to points formed sleeves over his shoulders and a large gold bow half his size, tied in the back.

Jay thought his boyfriend looked spectacular as he tied the bow. His own outfit consisted of a navy blue militaristic style outfit with silver accents, black gloves, and knee-high black boots. Nelson sat on the bed watching them. He eased his boredom by picking at a loose thread on his white, knee-length pants that billowed from the calf down. His outfit was similar to Ronin's but the shirt was a sleeveless turtleneck and was dark purple, and his sleeves were fabric bunched up from the wrists to the upper arms.

Silver leggings peeked above his knee-high black and silver boots.

These were normally not his style, but he didn't mind.

"What did I tell you, Cole," Griffin boasted, loudly, clapping his hands together. "My best work!"

"I believe so," Cole nodded, brushing his black locks to perfection. "Now I'm curious to see what you conjured for Kai."

"I swear if he's not ready by the time I get there, heads will roll!" Griffin exclaimed loudly as he bolted for the door. Cole and his staff laughed hearing Griffin's rant echoing off the hallways.

"I believe that is our cue," Cole announced. The servants quickly proceeded to take their positions in the ballroom, Ronin was the last to leave but Cole stopped him.

"Before you go, will do me a grand favor, Ronin?"

"Of course, name it?" Ronin replied. Cole swooped over to a corner of the room and pulled out two strange silver boxes. He opened one and pulled out the most beautiful piece of jewelry Ronin had ever seen.

"Will you give this to Kai? Tell him if he still wishes to be mine tonight, he'll wear it, but if not I'll understand." He requested. Ronin nodded and bolted towards the East Wing as fast as his legs could carry him. Cole smiled before opening the second box and pulled out an identical chocker, only this one was silver with an emerald heart, and snapped it around his neck then descended down the Western entrance to the ballroom. He couldn't wait to see what Griffin planned for Kai...

****************

Kai growled as he sat on a stool in front of the vanity, his chin resting irritated in his hand while Harumi, Tox, and Pixal dried, brushed, and tried in vain to do something with his untamable hair. After two hours of vicious bathing, he had been dragged out of the tub, dried, dressed in a thin, silk bathrobe for the next phase of his torture. The light material felt wonderful against his tender skin, raw from having half his skin scrubbed off, at least that was what he felt like.

"My God, you have so much, hair! Someone get me another brush!" Harumi hollered over her shoulder. Neuro rushed in, now sporting his new clothing as opposed to his normal uniform. A long velvet grey frock coat, folded over and buttoned down the left side of the chest to hip in a militaristic fashion, and matching pants, white gloves, and black boots with gold buckles. It took all of Kai's willpower not to bury his head in his folded arm, but he knew the girls would shriek if he did.

He bit back and growl every time they came across a particularly stubborn tangle.

"I don't think we'll be able to do anything with his hair, Harumi," Pixal said letting the silk strands bounce back to their natural shape.

"I could've told you that," Kai snapped.

"Oh, be nice," Tox scolded playfully and Harumi pondered for a bit.

"I suppose we'll just have to touch it up with jewelry then." She beamed as she clapped her hands together. "Your ears are pierced, right Kai?"

"Yes," Kai replied looking over his shoulder.

"I'll be right back then! Thank God Griffin decided to go with the gold!" Harumi cheered as she vanished and emerged a moment later with a small wooden jewelry box and began digging through the pieces. Finally, she gave a triumphant cheer and gently titled Kai's head so it was facing her. "Hold still." She warned as she gently pierced his ears with dangling, gold, and ruby earrings shaped like a flying phoenix. She then placed a crown-like headdress shaped like phoenix wings curled around a large ruby on his head, allowing his spikey bangs to spill over it.

"There! You look wonderful!" The girls cheered, while Kai examined their work in the mirror. He had never been fond of gold accessories before but found himself liking them as he admired his reflection.

"Now all we need to do is get you dressed," Tox decided.

"Hurry up, Harumi!" Griffin suddenly thundered as he hammered loudly on the door. "There's less than three hours until the ball starts and I need to see if Kai's clothes need any alterations!"

"We're coming!" Harumi shouted as she threw the door open and the girls led Kai behind the changing wall to help him into the difficult outfit. After a few minutes, Kai was glad he had the girls' help getting ready. The outfit Griffin had created for the evening had more ribbons and ties on it than he cared to count. It would have been a bear to get the thing on properly by himself.

"Wow, you've outdone yourself, Griffin," Tox complimented over the wall. "He looks ravishing!"

"I told you he'd look splendid in gold," Pixal added and Harumi smiled as she laced up the back of Kai's clothing. Kai skimmed over what it was exactly he was wearing and blushed, taking in just how splendid the outfit actually was. Kai wasn't a huge fan of dresses, but he thought this was absolutely gorgeous. The bright, crimson red dress left the top of his shoulders uncovered, but did cover the sides and flowed down into a fancy heart-shaped neckline.

It was a loose fit which made the dress both enjoyable to wear and look at.

His had been left uncovered and in a way, help put focus on his soft tanned skin. The dress's waist was narrow, but it was a loose fit. A gold bow had been wrapped around his waist and positioned slightly to one side. Below the waist, the dress widened had glittering gold ends. The dress reached just above his ankles and was the same length all around. He was given a pair of shining, golden, high-heeled shoes, gorgeous on their own, an ideal match in combination with the dress.

To top it all off he was wearing a pair of simple, but stylish, red elbow-length gloves.

"Are you all sure about this? It is splendid, but I'll probably make it look ridiculous." He pouted as he gazed at his reflection. Before anyone could protest Griffin thundered over.

"I don't ever want to hear that come out of your mouth again!" He scolded swatting Kai's head with two fingers making him wince. "First of all, nothing I make looks ridiculous!" He spoke in a harsh tone, but it softened as he continued but did not lose an ounce of its authority. "Second, that's nonsense and you know it! You're just nervous; I could strip you naked and send you to that ballroom in nothing but a smock and you'd still look fantastic, and don't you ever let yourself forget it."

Kai blinked at the tailor's earnestness then smiled, suddenly feeling very silly.

"We're all done," Harumi announced.

"Good," Griffin smiled as he grabbed Kai's clothed wrists and pulled him back into his room. "Now then, you're done; just give me a few minutes to get everyone else dressed and we'll escort you to the ballroom, got to do this traditionally after all," Griffin winked, ushering everyone out of the room, leaving Kai alone. Alone, at last, he looked at his reflection and smirked proudly at the stunning being staring back at him.

"I do look good." He said out loud when a knock disturbed his play. "Come in!" He called out, wondering who it was. Ronin entered the room holding a box in his hand which almost slipped when he took in Kai's new appearance.

"Can I help you with anything?" Kai smirked, proudly. Ronin looked confused then blushed and straightened himself.

"Cole asked me to bring this to you, he said if you still want to be his for the evening he'd like you to wear it, but he said he would understand if you didn't."

"Thanks a lot, Ronin, I'll see you downstairs." Kai smiled. Ronin bowed and left. Kai sat on the bed and carefully opened the box gasping at the choker inside. It had a golden dragon curled up around a ruby love heart. His fingers gingerly traced over the elegant carvings and circled the beautifully cut ruby shaped exactly like a love heart. Carefully, he removed it from the box and clasped it around his own neck...

[zeeboomblebee]

Alright, here we go.

Alright, I knew from the start that I would do something like this, and even though it’s pretty late, it’s not over yet.

Ninjago… god. It’s very difficult to put exactly into words how much this little kids show about LEGO ninja means to me. But I want to share my story and express exactly how proud and happy I feel today as this series and fandom meets an absolutely incredible milestone.

I am not one of the Ninjago veterans. Like plenty of current fans, I only got into the show because of The Lego Ninjago Movie. I remember seeing the previews for the movie when in theaters for watching The Lego Batman Movie. I wasn’t a big LEGO kid. I had a couple LEGO City firefighter sets as a kid and loved to build them, but that was that. The introduction of The LEGO Movie made me extremely excited for more LEGO movies because I absolutely adored the first one and it’s unique humor. When I saw TLNM’s previews (and absolutely adored the “La-lloyd” joke), I remember thinking “isn’t there a show called Ninjago?”. I was in the mood to absorb myself in another fandom, so I decided to give this show a chance in the summer of 2017. Needless to say, I was instantly captivated by this show. I remember Zane’s true potential being quite the shock, and that was really the big hooker. I never felt the plot twist of Lloyd being the green ninja since I knew it from the start, but it was intriguing nonetheless.

Seasons passed quickly as I binged them all at once. Zane’s death truly hit hard. That particular episode made me feel emotions I have never felt in any other fandom to date. I never slammed so quickly on the “Next Episode” button in my life 😂. Cole’s ghost arc really intrigued me, and I felt a deep connection with him from that moment forward, and he’s been my favorite ninja ever since. He just by himself has given me so much comfort during more stressful times in my life, than any other character. He is my comfort character, one of my favorite characters, and I really do love this earth boy more than I could possibly put into words.

I laughed, I cried, I felt a much wider range of emotions when watching this kids show than I ever could have fathomed. I wanted to kick myself for ever dismissing this show as “boring” and “childish” for so long instead of giving it a chance. Better late than never.

I finished Hands of Time, and was begging for more Ninjago seasons to be released. TLNM was soon in theaters, and I literally have never been so excited to see a movie as much as I had then. It didn’t quite meet my extremely high expectations, but I can never find it within myself to think too harshly of it; I owe it everything for dragging me into this world.

This show has affected me in so many ways. It has inspired me. It’s inspired the way I act and treat others. It inspires my creativity. My first ever OC, who I still hold very, very close to my heart, is a Ninjago OC. My first fanfiction was a Ninjago fanfic, and I’ve only become a better writer as I explore this world and it’s lore. I’ve drawn quite a few pieces of art, which has slowly helped hone my own art skills. But it’s also affected me and my community. I remember the moment I discovered my best friend of 2 years shared the same love for this show as me. Our trust in each other skyrocked that day, and we’ve never held a secret from each other since. I’ve met very close friends through this fandom as we bonded over the newest seasons and added lore. I have just built such a solid structure of people around me thanks to this show, and I really don’t know what I would do without some of them. I will forever be grateful for this show for this reason.

The people who make this entire show possible deserve recognition, gratitude, and love as well. I can’t possibly list them all, but a few in particular come to mind. Thank you Tommy Andreasen, for absolutely everything you do for this show. Knowing how genuinely passionate and happy you are to interact with your fans is always a breath of fresh air. I am confident the path of this show will never start shifting askew with your involvement. Thank you Brent Miller, for your genuine passion as well. There is no obligation for giving us fans the content that you do, yet you do it because it makes us (and hopefully you) happy. You reveal an entire new layer of the show to us that we normally don’t get the privilege of seeing in our fandoms, and it only makes us more excited and passionate for the series. And of course, thank you so, so much, Kirby Morrow. It’s been said many times by now, but I’ll say it again: this celebration for this fandom’s 10th anniversary is dedicated to you. Thank you for practically giving us 10 years of your voice to one of my most beloved characters of all time. It breaks our hearts that you could not be with us celebrating today. No matter what happens in the future, you will never be forgotten by any of us. We miss you, and even if most of us never knew you personally, we love you.

Ninjago just reached the most incredible milestone today. The 10 year anniversary of the pilot episodes is today. What a day. I can’t get over the idea that this show nearly ended after season 2. How could this show possibly end when there were still countless more stories of adventure and lore were meant to be told? As of now, we have 13 incredible seasons, and are very close to getting 2 more. The characters, the plot, and even the show itself has grown immeasurably in the past 10 years. Even if I’ve only been here for 3 and a half years, I’ve seen it grow dramatically right before my eyes. It is still a beautiful thing to witness. What a phenomenal show, filled with even more amazing people. So much talent in its fans. From fanfiction writers, fan artists, cosplayers, YouTubers, and countless, countless others, we have created an impressive and talented community that blows people always when they see us. Because there is so much more to this show than anyone could have ever expected.

Thank you, Ninjago. I love you so much. Happy 10th anniversary. I cannot wait until the day that I can say I’ve been a fan of this ongoing show as long as some people today can claim. Here’s to another 10 years.

🥂

[the-starryknight]

Top 5 of 2020

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (ish) favourite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

I was tagged by the utterly brilliant @tackytigerfic who is a gift to this fandom <3

I’d like to tag @sitp-recs (what lists or serieses are you most proud of? :) and @onbeinganangel @thesleepiesthufflepuff @teacup-tai @julcheninred @glittering-git @fantalf @peachpety @veelawings @ladderofyears @lastontheboat @mxmaneater @erlasart @erebeus-roxy @unicorn-in-the-library @zigster-ao3 @pineau-noir @queercore-curriculum @primavera-cerezos @gallifrey1sburning -- please don’t feel pressure to do this if you’re not up for it! and however many things you’d like to share (5 or more or less) is welcome, 2020 has been a hell of a year for creators <3

Like everyone else in the world, this year has been so challenging in so many ways.  And the past months have been incredibly lonely for a great many reasons -- moving, leaving a job I’ve loved, ending a relationship to name a few.  It’s been a bit of a lonely last few months, and I feel so lucky to have had fandom to turn to -- beautiful fics to read, brilliant people to meet, and my own, newly renewed creative energies to rediscover.

It’s been a pleasure to get to create beautiful things with you all, and to indulge in all your beautiful bits of creativity, and to be part of this lovely community of people.  And that I think making this blog -- choosing to reach out and be vocal in this wonderful community, that’s probably my #1 of 2020.  

As for the fics, well, I’ve only been at it since September, so bear with me!

A Room Up There (And You In It) (59k, T) - Everything in this dear fic came from all the emotions I’ve motioned above - being lonely in a great beautiful house, seeking connection among old things, the quietness of connecting with people you can’t see... I haven’t written something this long since I was in high school, and I’m so proud of myself for finishing it, even during such a crazy time of my life.  It’s been so gratifying to get to share it with you all.

Matching Pair (4k, T) - This fic taught me that I could write creatively again, and how cool is that?  I’ve mainly written plays in the recent years, so it was exciting to write something prose again.  Though I think I can write a bit better than that (and certainly edit better than I did this fic :’) it was wonderful to get to stretch my typing fingers again).  And I got such an incredible response! I felt so loved and welcomed into the fandom.  

Lie Awake (5k, T) - It was while I was editing this piece that I really thought about my role as a ‘being a fic writer.’  Matching Pair was meant to be a one-off.  Practice writing to see if I could still do it, publish it, and move on.  Except then I participated in the lovely Drarry Discord Drabble Challenge for October, and wrote a little drabble I adored featuring a trope I love (Master of Death!Harry).  I wrote this fic, and my dear friend gryffindorhearts completely tore it apart in her beta of it (in the best of ways).  See, I’m a playwright by training and as such, I pay very little attention to the way things flow in space--the way people interact with objects and rooms and the like. Not my fault, that’s the director’s job! Except in prose... I’m also the director... Anyway, it was editing Lie Awake that made me realize that I could (and wanted to) spend the time crafting my stories, to work at the things I struggle with and improve them, for no other reason than that I can improve.  And I think that’s pretty cool, so here I am writing an entire advent fic about spaces.  Oops?

halcyon days (1.3k, T) - Gosh.  When I wrote a great deal in high school (and desperately planned to be a published author before I finished college), I could sit at my keyboard and it felt like my own consciousness had been bypassed. The words would just flow without my needing to guide them much at all, it was so intuitive.  And then I got very, very depressed.  And I lost that ease of writing.  And I thought that was the end of my being a ~creative~ as a career and as a passion.  Since then I’ve learned how to write without that spark or to create at least something even when my mind isn’t working like I’d like it to do.  But this? This fic came to me like it used to do -- I wrote it in about 45 minutes (approximately 2 sprints on the Drarry Discord).  Though I don’t think much of my writing will flow so easily in the future, it was a needed reminder that I still have that kind of spark in me. 

Thanks for reading along <3  Thank you all for creating such beautiful stuff to get us all through this awful, awful year.  Cheers to a brighter 2021. 

[1meengreenie]

A Vent/Update

This is kind of a long post, so I’ll be hiding it behind a read more! This is more for me to get things off my chest, so it’s alright if you skip this. I’m doing my best to resume making art, but it’s been difficult, so if you stay tuned, I truly appreciate your patience!

So it shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone that it’s been quite a while since I’ve made any sort of art on this blog. I figured I should probably provide an update to anyone who is concerned that something has happened to me, considering what the world has been like recently.

tl;dr: I am fine and physically healthy, but not mentally. I will keep trying my best, but I will not make any promises.

Long version: As some of you may be aware, I deal with (professionally diagnosed!) major depression and PTSD (though the PTSD isn’t really a factor here, as far as I know). I have been struggling with this for quite a number of years; if you look up “symptoms of depression,” 95% of those boxes would be checked for me, most notably in this situation “loss of interest in things you enjoy,” “fatigue,” and “persistent sad/anxious/empty feelings.” I tend to have good days and bad days, though it is more common for me to go for a period of time feeling horrible, especially if outside factors have affected me. Of note, I was juggling two jobs throughout March and April, with one of the jobs being so taxing that I eventually had to quit due to the stress it was causing me. I would come home from that job, do work for my other job, then be so mentally-drained that I couldn’t do much more than watch stuff on Youtube or play picross to unwind a bit before I had to go to bed.

Understandably, not drawing for months has affected my ability to draw. There was one point of time that I really wanted to make an effort to make art again, then I was told something that made me feel like a failure of an artist and I completely lost motivation again (I believe they meant well, but I wasn’t in the right mindset to receive criticism). Throughout May I have tried to make different pieces of art, and none of them have lived up to my standards; going two months without drawing makes me feel like I’ve lost YEARS of skill. Am I being too harsh on myself? Likely. Is it really as bad as I’m making it out to be? Probably not, but having been a perfectionist my entire life I just can’t bring myself to show others a finished product that I myself am not completely proud of (for the record, I delete pictures from my hard drive that I’m not happy with, finished or no).

I miss being in middle school and drawing absolutely “cringey” fanart, not having a care in the world what other people thought of it. I miss being able to make art for the sake of fun, not having to worry about notes or likes or retweets or growing an audience. I used to draw absolutely tacky neon-colored Sonic OCs using gel pens and shared them with one online friend. Now it feels like if I post something I spent hours on and get 30 likes (which I interpret as “it’s ok, but not good enough to show anyone”), I failed. How can I make art fun again? It’s easy to say “Just do it, who cares what anyone thinks,” but how do you break down those mental roadblocks that have been built up over years? How can I silence that voice in the back of my head that says “You’re not good enough?”

I used to love making art, but when you have a family that considers it a waste of time and thinks the only “real jobs” are those in the education, business or medical fields, you lose faith in yourself and your dreams. I make art to make others smile. To hear (or read, in most cases) someone say “This is cute!” makes me feel like I accomplished my goal. It is my dream to be able to make a video game that people will enjoy and connect with, and I just hope that one day I’m able to.

I want to draw, I really, truly do, but when I muster the energy to try, there’s a voice telling me “Why bother?” Why do I care so much about what other people think? I can’t even say “I just need to care about what I think” because I’m extremely harsh on myself as it is.

After I post this, I am going to try as best as I can to put an effort into ignoring that criticizing voice and try drawing again. I am going to try to draw things that I want to draw, even if it’s from something people consider unpopular or it’s an OC that only I love and care about. I need to re-teach myself how to draw humanoid characters, and if I have a bit of a learning curve, so what? Everyone starts somewhere.

If you’ve read this far, thank you. I haven’t been able to share these thoughts with anyone, and it’s been eating away at me for quite a while (some of it even before this year, honestly). I feel like I can breathe a bit easier. I hope the next time you see a post on my blog, it’s a happy one.

-1MG

[theotherwesley]

tagged by @skyeventide! BRO THANK YOU <3

Rules: Choose your favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

1) Right at the beginning of 2020 (*can we even count the January-February Era as part of 2020? It feels like a separate timeline lol)  I designed a homebrew D&D campaign around an extended-universe Watership Down world, where all player characters are rabbits. :3 I designed it over the winter and DM’d my first test game with my family! It was so, so fun, and I had high hopes of continuing to playtest it and refine the rules this year.... ah, the best laid schemes o’ Buns and Men gang aft agley. U_U

Some samples: 

2) I got a truly awesome commission from a client on FR to do some stained glass window designs for their D&D campaign’s pantheon of gods. I got 4/6 done with them before my computer staged a revolution amongst our household electronics and went into a coma, taking BF’s laptop, a backup disk, and for some reason the toaster, with it. Then after that, the 2020 vibe got really uhhhhhh, shall we say, intense, and even after I found solution for my computer trouble I basically had zero creative fluid in the tank, so this was the last serious art I did for most of the year. :(

 But! I do really like these pieces, and I will eventually get to the remaining two...... sometime. I don’t want to jinx it. >>;

3) Got into a SUPER JUICY and EXTREMELY DENSE long-form RP with @salmaganto​ over on the Tolkien Blog. It involves so much research into historical and logistical minutiae about running a Big Evil Fortress, surviving sieges, uh... managing thrall labor, transitioning between war and peace... It is absolutely my favorite shit lol, just,,, 100% gratuitous worldbuilding nonsense, with my favorite micro-rarepair ship (or rather, its platonic counterpart). Again, this level of creative output, especially dealing with some controversial topics and in-depth analysis of like, authoritarian regimes, lost a looooooooooootttttttt of its um, escapist appeal. I desperately want to pick it back up, but man, this year was a lot, and I’m still recovering.  _( :’| 」∠)＿ We’re all still recovering.

4) Did some nerdy fanart for two of my favorite actual-play shows:

5) Attended a Zoom life-drawing session hosted in Perth, and it was a blast! 

6) Okay so this is a weird one, but, I edited a font??? I’m disproportionately pleased with this niche accomplishment. I had ZERO working knowledge of font design programs, and I went with a free, super nuts-and-bolts shareware application, taught myself how to use the basic functions, and then muddled my way through editing one of my favorite fonts, HamletOrNot:

“Well, this font isn't really Blackletter, but it has a certain historical touch, so it is welcome on these pages. The typeface Hamlet was designed by Edward Johnston for a Shakespeare edition, Cranach Press, 1929. The award winning book Hamlet was considered “the most beautiful book of the year 1930”. HamletOrNot – digitized by Manfred Klein & CybaPee.“ 

If you hunt down the mysterious user “CybaPee”, you find typographer Petra Heidorn and her many, many preserved, historical fonts, which have been painstakingly digitized and made available for free on... well, pretty much every free font website ever, which made it a real pain to source. 

I love this font with my whole heart, and I very much wanted to use it for parts of my comic (you know, the one) but HamletOrNot has a couple of readability failings that made it a bad match for small dialogue, and worse for ME, SPECIFICALLY: it does not include most diacritic marks.  *cries in Tôlkíën* 

So I embarked on this fool’s quest to do some touchups and add the diacritics and special characters I’d need to spell all the crazy bullshit for the comic, because HOW HARD COULD IT BE, HAHA, TO ADD A FEW MARKS AND CLEAN UP A FEW TANGENTS?  HAHAHA. HAHA. .....Anyway, I think I actually started this process sometime in like, 2019, but I FINISHED IT IN 2020, and I’m proud of myself. 

I’m calling the modified font ArdaOrNot, and it looks something like this: 

7)  Oh yeah, about that comic (you know, the one): 

‘Ey, would you look at that! Progress! :D  Slow, agonizing, unoptimized progress! I was hoping I’d have the first six full color pages ready with lettering and everything by the end of 2020, but.... well, here we are. Wow, I am SO TIRED OF BEING SICK, I HAVE THINGS I WANT TO DO SO BAD HAHAHAA FUCK 

8) Another minor accomplishment that I’m disproportionately proud of, I made some new baller playlists and polished up a few old ones to a fine gleam.

Anyway-- I don’t know who has and hasn’t been tagged, but consider this an invitation to anyone who has the energy to post your highlights from the last year. It was actually pretty therapeutic to see some things I DID manage to accomplish, because so much of this damn year felt empty and lonely and barren. But there they stand: the weird little triumphs that were sprinkled throughout the months, somehow improbably blooming in the wasteland. :’)

[sagemoderocklee]

2020 has been a weird fucking year, to put it mildly. There have been a lot of ups and downs, and with New Year’s Eve and the start of 2021 upon us, focusing on the ~positive~ seemed like a better way to end the year, and hopefully start 2021 feeling inspired and proud for overcoming this horrendous year.

For many people, it was difficult--even impossible--to get anything done this year (myself included), and that’s okay! But if you were able to make progress on writing projects, even if it was just one or even if it was just part of one, you should celebrate that! I wish I’d thought of this sooner and organized it better, but regardless I wanted to celebrate my own accomplishments with regards to my writing, and encourage others to do the same! I was going to tag people, but I’m not sure with it being 2 hours til midnight for me if that would feel like putting too much pressure on others, so if you want to do this too please do!

This wrap up is honestly just a self-indulgent look back on the works I’ve made and what I learned/gained from each, maybe what I don’t like about them, some totaling on what I did, and some resolutions for the next year. It’s silly, but I think it’s kinda fun and if you missed any of the things I have posted this year, you’ll find them here!

2020 Fic Wrap Up:

Kado: Parts II+III (COMPLETED)

Kado was started in September of 2019 for the @puregaalee​ summer event. This was a last minute thing that I started the day the prompt was due and managed to write the first part in about 6 hours while sitting in a cafe--remember that? Sitting in cafes? Man, I miss that. I hadn’t anticipated working on Kado, but I decided that I was going to finish it this year, and I’m honestly amazed that I did. This fic is sweet and fun, and surprisingly popular, though it isn’t my favorite of my works. However, it is a light, fluffy little romcom modern AU, and I learned a lot with it because despite my struggles with modern AUs and their horrible lack of political intrigue, this fic forced me to work within set parameters. I was only writing a 3 part story, and each part could only be 9 scenes long. For those unfamiliar, kado is another term for Ikebana, and in Ikebana there are specific elements to follow. Certain styles will only use three branches, some will use nine. So my goal was for the structural elements of the fic to mimic Ikebana. In doing this, I was able to do something I don’t usually do, which is keep this story more concise.

I’m still not sure how I personally feel about the ending, but I think endings are always a struggle, especially with something like this.

Gate of Dreaming (COMPLETED) 

This is a fic that I started last year, then left to sit untouched with only 2k words. Getting back into it was a bit difficult because I was writing something very different from my usual: stream of consciousness. This fic was very experimental for me not only because of the stream of consciousness, but also because of the changing tenses. This was another exercise--unexpected though it was--in brevity. With this particular story, it couldn’t be dragged on and on, because--despite the 100 year time span--the events take place within the Infinite Tsukuyomi. This was also the first time I’d worked from Lee’s PoV in quite some time, so that was fun because I do enjoy writing him, but usually write from Gaara’s PoV. This is definitely one of my favorites from this year, and since it had been sitting on the back burner for so long, I’m so excited that I could finally get it done.

Another one where the ending really wasn’t easy to achieve, but I did end up liking it more than I expected, and I think the best thing is that it’s open-ended which leaves room for others to guess at what the future holds.

It Eats Your Heart (WIP)

This was an unexpected fic for me in every way imaginable. Starting another fic? Making another modern AU? Tackling the horror genre? None of those were things I’d planned to do this year, but lo and behold, that’s just what I did. I really enjoy a good bit of horror, but it is NOT an easy genre to work within, and this fic has definitely been a push for me. But with it being such a push, the payoff is far more. Stepping out of my comfort zone is something I like doing, but I think this is the biggest step outside of that and I am so incredibly proud of how that first chapter turned out because of it. I was really able to surprise myself with this fic, and I am hoping to update the next chapter early on in the year.

Absolution (WIP)

This fic is probably the second oldest idea/longest unpublished fic I currently have up. Formerly a much longer title, the idea for this fic came to me in May of 2017 when a friend, @brianadoesotherjunk / @brianadoesart, posted a piece of GaaLee fanart that sparked inspiration. The fic took off, morphed into something much bigger than the one scene depicted by the art, and now 3 years later, the first part is up. Initially, this was meant to be a long shot, but after sitting with this for so long, I realized that I needed to split it up into 9 parts, which allowed me to use this for GaaLee bingo and finally publish it. Much of the first part was already written before this year, but I’d been quite stuck on it until now. This is actually probably one of my favorite GaaLee concepts to date. I remember back in the day, there weren’t a lot of different takes on getting Lee to Suna so he and Gaara could fall in love, so (at the risk of sounding cocky) I think that Lee as a nanny is rather inspired. I think with this fic, I pushed myself the hardest to get past the hurdle of writer’s block and accepted that publishing is probably the best way to motivate myself to keep going. The feedback for this fic has been really motivating, so I think I’m probably right about that.

I do think there are some parts in the middle or towards the end that could maybe use some tightening up, but I’m just happy to finally have this fic out in the world.

The Art of Love: Chapter 11 (WIP)

TAoL is such a ridiculous labor of love. The chapters for this fic are novellas in and of themselves, so each time I update it takes a lot of work to get them out. This fic is one of those like magnum opus type fics. I have put so much into it, and I’m honestly amazed that it’s only been up for 3 years because I’m approaching the halfway mark on it, and I don’t think I expected to be there by now. Despite being able to churn out 30k chapters, I have a hard time focusing on one thing and I often struggle with mental health related writer’s block, so big works are always sort of sporadic in their updates. 

This particular update of TAoL was definitely one of my favorites though. Initially, I didn’t plan to go the sort of dark fantasy rout that I did with Shikamaru, but I actually really love what I’ve done with him, though I worry others won’t be as into it or that the execution isn’t quite there. One thing I would like to work on with future chapters of TAoL, however, is maybe pairing things down a bit--though I’m not sure that’ll always be possible. The next chapter is a Naruto PoV chapter, though, so I expect that one to be a MUCH shorter chapter than the last three and should be able to get it out sometime next year.

Before I could publish this chapter, however, I did go through and make some big changes, which is something I often struggle with because of such long breaks in between working on certain projects. I will say, though, that TAoL continues to push me to greater heights as a writer, and I look forward to actually finishing this fic someday.

Thirteen Strokes: 1 + 2 (WIP)

Another unexpected fic this year, however, this one was actually an idea for about a year, unlike IEYH. This fic has really given me a lot of perspective on my own writing and world building, and has inspired me to sit down and really start committing the things I’ve developed to paper to create a cohesive view of Suna, Wind, and the shinobi world. This fic is meant to be a Romance. Like just full on Romance. I write a lot of tragedy and focus on a lot of darker themes in my writing, so while I don’t think of this as stepping outside of my comfort zone, it is very different from my usual, and a really nice change of pace. I think, in all honesty, it is one of my best works, and I do hope I can continue to deliver on the remaining 11 parts of this story.

if this were the last i felt you breathing (COMPLETED)

Ugh. This fic has been my enemy for 2 long years. I signed up for a Secret Santa exchange, and of course, I regretted doing it when I found that I was not motivated and, after the month of October where I was churning out fic after fic for GaaLee Bingo, that I was massively burned out. I wasn’t able to think past writer’s block, and so I ended up settling on dusting off an old, unfinished piece for my giftee, and I hope they can forgive me for not coming up with something brand new for them.

This fic was a struggle. Working so closely with the canon--following the Rescue Kazekage Arc as closely as I did for this fic--made this a much bigger challenge and this fic sat and sat and sat for two years, untouched and incomplete. I’m still not sure how I feel about it. I know it’s not my best work, but I am glad that this fic isn’t hanging over my head and that I was able to deliver something to my secret santa giftee.

My goal with this fic was to rewrite this particular arc from Lee’s PoV to give more depth to the arc and shift the emotional core of it away from Naruto. Naruto as a character has a lot of flaws that never get addressed, and one of the things that is consistently frustrating for me is the way the emotional core of the series rests on him in unrealistic and often superficial ways. Naruto hasn’t spoken to Gaara in three years, but I’m supposed to believe he’s this affected by Gaara’s kidnapping? Temari and Kankuro are right there! Lee is right there! I wanted to see that, so that’s what I set out to do, and ultimately I don’t think I fully succeeded, but I tried. I guess not everything can be a resounding success

---

This year I managed to do a lot more than I realized. New works, updates, and COMPLETED pieces?! I never would have thought, but staying home gave me more free time, and when I was too broke to work on costumes, writing fanfiction was something free I could do.

Total new works: 5 Total updates: 9 Total completed works: 3 Total words this year: 143,587

---

I have a lot of goals for the coming year, and I know I won’t make all of them, but that won’t stop me from trying.

2021 Writing Resolutions:

Reach 1million words (+238,073 words)

Finish IEYH

Finish Pearl-Filled Lungs

Update TAoL (Chapter 12 and 13)

Update Absolution

Update 13S

Update Find Me (Chapter 6)

Start the Ballad of the Dragon and the Phoenix

Start editing Alliance

Return to working on Honor Bound

Return to working on We Need Not Be Yellow Tulips

[xnchxntmxnt]

Hi Spencer!! Ahhh I hope you’ve reached 200 by the time you get this! It’s been so amazing watching you grow and your works have brought lots of comfiness into my life 🥰 thank you so much for creating and writing and making one of the most aesthetic blogs I’ve ever seen (hehe love the constellation aesthetic) sending lots of positive vibes and appreciation your way 💕

For the matchup event (ahh it’s my first time ever doing one and I hope I didn’t put too much 😱) thank you in advance 💖

Name: eggu

Pronouns: she/her

Preferred partner: open to anyone

MBTI: INFJ

Horoscope: Aquarius

Aesthetic: light academia, soft, oversized sweaters, korean street wear, fandom merch, white and pastels, 4:00 am talks about life, stars and clouds

Some things about me:

I took piano, dance and martial arts lessons growing up and I still enjoy playing piano a lot

I enjoy playing video games on my spare time (I’m currently selling my soul to genshin impact)

I really love music of all genres but I’m currently really into kpop and khiphop (my favourite artists are seventeen and stray kids)

I really like naps and sleeping in general and prefer it over eating — I would say I have pretty low energy in general

I like desserts, pastries and dim sum

I recently got into watching art streams, journaling and collecting cute stationery

I’ve pretty much been a huge geek/fangirl all my life and have loved reading and animation since I can remember

I just finished watching jujutsu kaisen and am currently watching fruits basket (lol I enjoy both extreme shounen and fluffy shoujo)

I’m human and have lots of insecurities but I’m learning

Ideal traits in a partner:

Able to appreciate the quiet moments

I’m not a super physical person, but it would be nice to be physically close to someone I trust and that respects my boundaries

Trustworthy — didn’t have a great past relationship 😞

Isn’t afraid to keep up with banter and has witty remarks... someone that can keep me on my toes

Is driven in something they love

willing to learn and grow alongside me

@eggutartu

Thank you so so so much!! 💕💕💕 i worked really hard on the aesthetic so I’m glad you like it and I’m glad you like what I write! If you ever have ideas, don’t be afraid to share!

Anyway, onto the notes & matchup (I was really proud of this one 😁😁😁)

WHEN I TELL YOU I IMMEDIATELY HAD AN IDEA, I I M M E D I A T E L Y HAD AN IDEA. I was so proud of myself when i got this lol cause I saw your entry when I woke up, barely skimmed it, and said…

TSUKISHIMA KEI

✧ 𝐻𝑜𝑤 𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝑀𝑒𝑡 ✧

Okay okay hear me out

Hot topic (or something similar but I’m American so hot topic)

He was looking to get something for Yamaguchi’s birthday & maybe something for himself because don’t tell me Tsukishima Kei isn’t into anime I know he is

Probably shonen but still

Anyway

You were both reaching for the same thing (yes I’m using THAT trope)

Fortunately for you, there was more than one keychain but still

He was about to get low key defensive like “hey watch it” y’know like

Was in a v short mood

But the second he got the word “hey” out he turned to look at you and just

Froze

And got all embarrassed because look at this beautiful girl he’s standing net to shit he was just cursing you out in his brain

So he’s staring at you with wide eyes and you’re like “oh I’m sorry--you like JJK too? That’s cool”

And he’s stuttering Tsukishima Kei is flustered, everybody

So he’s like “uh yeah kinda I guess I don’t really talk about it a lot cause my friend isn’t into it”

“Well I mean if you ever wanna talk about it we can”

“Really?”

“Yeah, gimme your phone I’ll give you my number. If that’s chill”

“Sure, I guess, yeah”

Akiteru was home that day and hadn’t seen his brother smile this much since he was a kid

Any time he asked though Kei just got all huffy and went to his room

✧ 𝐺𝑒𝑛𝑒𝑟𝑎𝑙 𝐻𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑐𝑎𝑛𝑜𝑛𝑠 ✧

U two make playlists for each other on a regular basis (Spotify playlists w collaboration turned on are your best friend)

They're always killer and hit a little too hard

When you tell him you have a new favorite song, he listens to it on repeat until he knows all the lyrics and can pick on you for saying the wrong lyrics if you ever do

Also because it reminds him of you

He loves that he can be himself around you

Really he does

Like that’s one of his favorite things

He doesn’t have to hide any of his hobbies or really anything about him really and he appreciates it so much

It took a while to get there with him, but once he trusted you 100%, he realized he was in love with you

Love and trust are the same things to him (or at least similar) so he knew he loved you when he realized he really could be himself with you around and probably told you as such

He’s not one to push your boundaries, but just had to tell you so it was probably a text like

“Look I don’t expect you to say this back if you’re not ready for that yet, but you’re so amazing--I need to be honest. I’ve done nothing but stare at the ceiling for an hour and think and just realized how in love with you I am. I really am. Take that as you will.”

And then just straight up DIDN’T ANSWER UNTIL 2 AM THAT NIGHT LIKE “sorry I was at Yamaguchi's” LIKE BRO JUST DROP A BOMB LIKE THAT DAMN

Needless to say, he WAS at Yamaguchi's and left his phone at home but it was because he was too afraid of what you’d say

He got home at 11

He just procrastinated for three hours until he finally answered you back

And when you told him you loved him too, his heart SOARED he proceeded to call yams and squeal like a seven-year-old girl for a half hour

If ur shorter than him he uses your head as an armrest, no exceptions

He does it if you're taller than him too he just goes up on his toes to do it

Anyway

Can and will pick on you for everything

It’s the way he shows his love alright

Cute stationery? It’s tacky and “why do you have this it’s irritatingly adorable”

“You’re irritatingly adorable”

“I’m not adorable”

“Yes you are Tsukki"

Lets you call him Tsukki until you can call him Kei

You have to have a thick skin with him because sometimes it’s hard to tell when he’s being sarcastic or not

If he ever did make you cry or genuinely upset though, he’d tear himself to pieces about it for hours and be completely unresponsive to his phone if you text him because he thinks you hate him

When he finally texts you back he’ll never admit how upset he is, but he will apologize for making you upset

It’s really hard to do emotions with this dude but you try to manage

If you can figure out how to make him talk about his problems “let’s talk about Akiteru” “no”? Yamaguchi will love you forever

You get the best friend approval anyway but you get an extra gold star if you can get him to open up more

Oh and you totally like to show up at games or practice and everyone including Ukai and Takeda love you for it because he tries a little harder so he doesn’t look bad in front of you

It’s like a switch he goes from like 5% to 70% effort but that’s the best he’s giving until it’s game time then he’ll crank it to 100%

✧ 𝐷𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝐼𝑑𝑒𝑎 ✧

Okay okay but but but but but

Anime dates

Like once a week you two sit and watch anime over discord or smth

You don’t usually talk much but it’s nice to be in each others’ presence

Or close to that

When you can get together it’s that much better

You trade off whose house you’re at every other week, and whoever's visiting picks up snacks on the way

You’ll watch tv, make fun of the characters together, roll your eyes at the sappy moments but lean over to kiss Tsukki anyway

It’s overall a very wholesome scene

But there will be times when he is stressed and tired for whatever reason and he’ll fall asleep

Sometimes he’ll be curled into a little ball on his side of the couch

Sometimes he’ll slouch his head against your shoulder with his arm around your waist

Sometimes he’ll pause the show and pull you down against him and just lay with you for a while

Not even watch tv just

Be happy in each others’ presence

He’ll fall asleep from time to time and you take his glasses off for him

He looks so soft when he’s sleeping and not glaring at people

✧ 𝑍𝑜𝑑𝑖𝑎𝑐 𝐼𝑛𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑚𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 ✧

Libras, while they may not exactly say it, are romantics. They enjoy little things about romance, however modern, like spontaneous dates and flowers. They initiate clever ideas and Aquariuses are good at adding a different perspective, so prepare for in-depth conversations. On the other hand, Aquariuses tend to be trendsetters, which Libras support wholeheartedly.

✧ 𝐴𝑒𝑠𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑡𝑖𝑐 ✧

✧ 𝑃𝑙𝑎𝑦𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡 ✧

my boy - Billie Eilish

Hug - SEVENTEEN

King of the Clouds - Panic! At The Disco

She’s In The Rain - The Rose

I Can’t Handle Change - Roar

Runners up: Sugawara Koushi, Akaashi Keiji

[lyssismagical]

Did my heart love till now? For I ne'er saw true beauty till this night

Parkner Week Day Four: “I will pepper in the fact that I am gay.” / coming out / first date

Peter slips out onto the fire escape, desperate to escape his obnoxious roommates for even a minute.

The city is dark and quiet, despite it only being eleven. Peter’s surprised, considering it’s New York, but the borough they live in is different than Queens or Manhattan ever was.

Harry and Gwen’s bickering follows him out onto the fire escape, so he shuts the window behind him, muffling their voices. They fight a lot. He knows they mean well, they love each other deep down, but they’ve both got big personalities, lots of opinions, and they’re both too stubborn to step down from a fight. Peter’s been appointed as the peacemaker of the group, but even then, there’s only so much he can do. It’s easier somedays to leave them to fight for a little while, get it out of their system, than to try to get them to reconcile.

It doesn’t help that they’re all struggling college students, desperately trying to make a name for themselves in a big city like New York. Harry wants to be a director or maybe join the fashion scene if he can, Gwen wants to make it as an actress, and Peter’s dream is to get on Broadway. They’re all nineteen, though, barely scraping by at NYU or AMDA, trying to pay rent with their minimum wage jobs as waiters.

It isn’t particularly easy, but when has anything ever been easy?

Just because the chances are slim and there will be a lot of struggle, doesn’t mean any of them are willing to give up on their dreams. They’re all prepared for the hardships as long as they have each other.

“What light through yonder window breaks?” A voice calls out from the street below where Peter’s feet dangle. “It is the east, and Juliet is the sun. Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, who is already sick and pale with grief, that thou her maid art far more fair than she: Be not her maid, since she is envious; Her vestal livery is but sick and green and none but fools do wear it; cast it off. It is my lady, O, it is my love!”

Peter hasn’t read Romeo and Juliet since he was in high school, but he’d know those lines anywhere.

He can’t see whoever is quoting Shakespeare up to him, too many shadows cast in the street, but the voice is deep with a southern drawl, projecting easily up to where Peter is.

“O, that she knew she were! She speaks yet she says nothing: what of that? Her eye discourses; I will answer it. I am too bold, ‘tis not to me she speaks: Two of the fairest stars in all the heaven, having some business, od entreat her eyes to twinkle in their sphere till they return. What if her eyes were there, they in her head? The brightness of her cheek would shame those stars, as daylight doth a lamp; her eyes in heaven would through the airy region stream so bright that birds would sing and think it were not night. See, how she leans her cheek upon her hand! O, that I were a glove upon that hand, that I might touch that cheek!”

“Do you just have it all memorized?” Peter calls out, knowing it’s meant to be his line. He can’t help the smile as the mysterious Romeo laughs from the streets below.

His voice is softer as he speaks without lines. “I played Romeo for three weeks worth of performances last year. I saw you sitting up there, and couldn’t help myself.”

Peter frowns, thinking back to last year. At AMDA, he auditioned for Romeo, but he ended up playing a background character with a single line instead. He was told it was because he was only a freshman, but it was a pretty big hit to his ego. He can’t remember who actually got the role of Romeo though.

“I don’t suppose you quote Shakespeare to just every sad looking person sitting on their fire escapes?”

“There’s a first time for everything,” Romeo says. “You go to AMDA, don’t you? I think I remember seeing you around… You don’t happen to work at that diner on 64th street, do you?”

Peter laughs. “I don’t know how you know that, but yeah, I do. I’m a sophomore at AMDA, double majoring in musical theatre and performing arts. And spending nights at that diner to pay rent.”

“Me and my friend get dinner there all the time. I remember you because Cassie kept pointing you out as one of the greatest dancers in one of her classes.”

The blush that creeps up Peter’s neck makes him feel warm all the way to the core. He’s been working really hard in his dance classes to get where he is now, it’s nice to get that kind of recognition. “That’s very nice of her.”

“I was pointing you out because you happen to be one of the prettiest people I’ve ever seen,” Romeo adds on. “And you have a lovely voice.”

Peter tries to summon any piece of confidence he can, but comes up mostly empty. “Would you mind stepping out of the shadows, so I can compliment you too?”

Romeo laughs again sweetly, and then he’s stepping out from where he’d been leaning against a building across the street. He walks to the middle of the deserted street until he’s properly under the light of the one of the streetlamps.

“O, speak again, bright angel! For thou art as glorious to this night, being o’er my head as is a winged messenger of heaven unto the white-upturned wondering eyes of mortals that fall back to gaze on him when he bestrides the lazy-pacing clouds and sails upon the bosom of the air,” he says.

Romeo is gorgeous and Peter remembers him too. Harley Keener, a Junior at AMDA, in the same musical theatre program as Peter. Harley’s wearing a pair of tight jeans and a flannel, blond curls bouncy and messy, blue eyes wide and sparkling, hands lifted towards Peter as he recites his lines with so much passion and truth.

“You’re calling me and angel? When you look like you do?” Peter blurts. He can hear Gwen’s muffled voice rising behind him and knows he doesn’t have much more time until they finish their argument and come looking for him. “You were brilliant as Romeo, too. I played one of the guards, but I watched your performance every night.”

Harley smiles, showing off his adorable dimples. “I would’ve loved it if you could’ve played opposite me, though. I think you would’ve made an amazing Juliet.”

“I think the world would’ve rioted if they saw a guy playing Juliet. I think Shakespeare would’ve risen from the dead just to have a heart attack.”

Peter can barely stop grinning at the not-so-subtle hints that Harley’s into guys too.

“We’d make a pretty amazing duo, though, don’t you think?”

“My ears have no yet drunk a hundred words of that tongue’s utterance, yet I know the sound: Art thou not Romeo and a Montague?” Peter calls out, putting on his best Juliet voice.

Harley laughs brightly. “You skipped a few lines, but I’ll let it slide if you come down here.”

“If they do see thee, they will murder thee.”

“Is that a no? O, wilt thou leave me so unsatisfied?”

Peter shakes his head, already pulling himself up to his feet. “I’ll be down in five, Harley. You want to get coffee?”

“I’d love to get coffee.”

Grinning, Peter pries open the window and slips back into his apartment where Gwen and Harry seem to have finally gone quiet.

He changes into a nicer outfit quickly, nearly face-planting in his haste to tug his jeans on, and then he skips into the living room to say goodbye to his friends.

“You have plans?” Harry says when he sees Peter. “I thought you were staying in tonight?”

“I met somebody!” Peter practically squeals, bouncing on his toes. He can barely contain his excitement. He hasn’t dated anybody since high school, spending college focused on his career and education, but he’s not about to turn somebody like Harley down.

Gwen lifts an eyebrow. “You met somebody… on the fire escape?”

“We may or may not have been quoting Romeo and Juliet… We’re getting coffee. I’ll catch you both up when I get back, okay?”

Just as Peter’s about to turn away, Harry grabs his arm. “Wait, who was it? Do we know them?”

Peter, blushing furiously and so giddy like he’s a lovesick teenager, says, “Harley Keener. He played Romeo last year, remember?”

Both their jaws drop in shock, eyes wide. They remember him, for sure. It’s hard not to remember somebody like Harley.

Peter doesn’t bother sticking around any longer, racing out the front door to get down to Harley.

Apparently, Harley knows a nice coffee place that’s open at the late hours of night, so he leads the way, bumping shoulders, teasing each other, and making small talk mostly about their friends and school.

“I don’t know if this is too forward,” Harley says when they make it to the coffeeshop. “But I just wanna know if you’re into guys or not. I’m gay… If this is totally platonic, that’s cool too, I just want to know.”

Peter grins, unable to help himself. “I’m bi, so… I thought we were being pretty obvious how we felt by saying we should be two of the most famous star-crossed lovers there are.”

Harley laughs, leading Peter to the counter to give their orders. “I suppose… So, this would be a date?”

“I was kind of hoping so, yeah. If that’s okay?”

“It’s perfect, yeah.”

Harley pays, if only because Peter managed to forget his wallet in his haste to get out of his apartment, and then they start walking back to Peter’s apartment.

Harley talks about how he’s from a small town in the middle of nowhere, Tennessee, how he always dreamed of making it on Broadway like Peter, how scared he was submitting an application to AMDA, how much everything changed when he got accepted. He talks about his family, his mom and little sister back home, how proud they are of everything he does, how he’s going to work so much harder for them. He talks about his experience in New York, how different it is compared to Rose Hill, how much excitement there is, how fast it moves and how full it is.

It’s strange to hear about New York from an outsiders perspective. Peter’s only left New York twice. Both times for Academic Decathlon which took him to DC and to Toronto.

In turn, Peter talks about May, how much he loves her, how much she’s supported all of his decisions. He doesn’t say much about Ben or his parents, but he says enough that Harley links their free hands together and squeezes comfortingly. He talks about Harry and Gwen, about school and his job, how much stress has been piled on his shoulders by everyone wanting him to choose a more possible dream. How he refuses to give up on his Broadway dreams.

They make it back to his apartment all too soon, hands still linked, noses and cheeks red from the cold.

“This was really nice,” Peter murmurs. “I would invite you up to my place, but I have two roommates who are crazy obnoxious and loud and a lot. I’d really like to do this again, though.”

“Me too. I’ve been wanting to talk to you for a while now, I didn’t think it would be like that. Quoting Shakespeare isn’t the greatest pickup line.”

Peter shrugs, tugging Harley a little closer. “It worked.”

“Is there anyway I could get your number?”

“I’ll give it to you in exchange for something,” Peter bargains, smiling dopily.

“And what’s that?”

“Kiss me?”

Harley doesn’t waste a second, pressing their mouths together and backing Peter into the brick wall of his apartment building, free hand grabbing Peter’s waist while trying not to spill his coffee. Peter wraps his arms around Harley’s neck and shoulders, smiling into the kiss.

Eventually, they do have to pull away, both of them grinning at each other and they let out twin breathless laughs.

Harley fishes a pen out of his bag, presenting it and his forearm to Peter.

He jots down his number with a little heart, trying not to think too much about the wiry muscle in his forearm and how much he really wants to see Harley’s biceps too. He leans up to kiss Harley once more before he pushes open the door to his building.

“I’ll see you around?”

“Good night, good night! parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow.”

Taglist: @littlemissagrafina  @spideygirl2003 @romeoandjulietyouwish @c-artara @shadedrose01 @likeaphoenix13 @pj-hermes-tonystark-obsessed  @you-get-killed-walk-it-off @kitkatwinchester  @emo-girl10 @justme--emily  @hold-our-destiny @imalivebecauseirondad @spiderman-peterman @dykeragee @maryserrao @heeeyitskay 

[nopethatsnotembarrassing]

September 8th 2021  1:11AM

Today/last night was the concert.

This was really something I needed

Instead of nearly crying because I'm upset aI am on the verge of tears because I am so happy. It was such a good time! My legs are going to hurt like a bitch the next couple days but it was more than worth it.

Next time he comes I am definitely doing the VIP again (and going to the venue an hour early -just for safety like I kinda wanted to) and making another shirt for him.

I definitely didn't expect to nearly cry at a rock concert but hearing him talk about the industry and "Don't let others Fuck up what your patonate about" really fuckin hit me.

But it was incredible, at first I was a bit heartbroken because we had missed the VIP pre-show because I has gotten the information wrong and I was so pissed at myself. But it turns out that I wasn't the only one! There had been a glitch that a bunch of the normal VIP people got an email with the wrong time and the only noticed once it was over so to make up to us Nate played an unreleased song (that isn't coming out for some time) in its entirety and I can only hope that he was backstage listening to us all scream and cheer and clap to this song.

And this really sounds weird to say but I'm oddly proud of him (?) And like thankful that he is such a genuine human that he was willing to risk getting in trouble with his manager just to make it up to us due to a mistake outside of his control.

I am telling this all out of order but let's start from the beginning a bit more...

So as soon as we got to the venue we walked up to the merch and talked to the (very nice) Ahren who was running it and as soon as we said "hi" he shouted "Oh my gosh I love your shirt! I designed Paid in Exposure!" And just to get a complement from the actual creator of the beautiful art piece is just one of the biggest honor I could have been given. (And when I told him aboit how I made it glow in the dark so that Nates silhouette would show up then, he thought that was awesome!)

But yeah all the opening acts were amazing (and it was really funny how they started with Boy Hero who was poppy-but-also-heavy then went to Vespera whose first words on stage were "I'm sorry to all the parents of CG5 goers for what I'm about to do." And went into solid metal with songs about suicide, loss, etc. Then to family friendly CG5 [and Dheusta] was just the best) and Viv kept getting more and more hyped was the best.

But yeah he played like every song I have wanted to hear live from him (no spoilers though)

And when he finished his set we were all cheering for an encore with: "ONE MORE SONG- please" again and again and so when they came back out he said "You guys want another song?" The entire crowd shouted "PLEASE" at him and he laughed and replied "You guys said PlEAsE?!? I'll give you two then." It was adorable. And I only wish I had been recording.

And before they did their encore was when he had a heart to heart with us about not letting others discourage us from what we want to do and about how he loves doing what he does and loves that theater (it was the only "repeat" venue and that was because he demanded that the Chicago venue be that one)

Also since we had missed the pre-show we had missed getting our bags so we had to go over and claim ours before Nate went on stage.

Oh yeah we were also standing next to a guy that was 6'8 - next to my 5'3 ass and Viv's 4'11 ass we must have been quite the picture. And we actually talked to and made friends with the people around us.

It was just overall a positive and happy time and like I said if/when he comes back around on tour I am gonna do everything in my power to go and see him (and bring him a gift)

Like it was standing room only, I was constantly bumping into people and being bumped into but not once did I even think about being anxious about being close to so many people. It was incredible and I am so happy I decided a year+ ago to just say "fuck it, it'll be fun" and got the tickets. It was a great into back into "normal life" again.

I am going to try and post some of the photos and videos I took probably tomorrow either on the train or after Thesis class.

-Also idk where Viv got this idea but as soon as we got into the car they said "You know I did not expect him to be that good looking in person" and I cannot fathom that. He sounds gorgeous and looks it too.

-Oh also the shirt I ended up getting at the concert because it was a cool design that I couldn't quite see is a "Manipulate" shirt... talk about fate huh? (Or at least either dumb luck or simply being subconsciously observant)

Hopefully next time he comes around we won't have to be as distant and maybe do a meet and greet or something?

[deardragonbook]

As well as writing I really enjoy art. 

Mostly digital art but this summer it’s all in the watercolour. And the first person to read my book was like, “oh, it’s so cool that you draw and write because that way readers can actually see what the character’s look like in your head!” 

And I just want to say... the same thing I told her which is... I wish. 

Like, I’m not a good enough artist to represent on paper what’s in my head. To the point where my main character is a dragon with golden stripes and I always draw her with yellow stripes because I can’t make the golden one’s look good. 

And the design isn’t the problem, because the professional I hired for my cover pulled it off. It’s me. Definitely me. 

I also once drew my protagonist’s father with black hair and brown eyes... he has brown hair and green eyes. I don’t know what happened there. I have terrible memory for literally everything. It’s exaggerated enough that it is funny. 

I also am terrible at drawing age (although I am getting better), so when I draw a group of characters you can’t tell which are children, teens or adults. 

And that’s just the beginning of my trouble! And I find it quite funny. 

I still love drawing and I do have some pieces that are fantastic representations of my characters... it’s just not all of them. Or even most of them. It’s like, a small fraction. 

Here’s some of my best and worst pieces to give you an idea: 

This is one of my fave pieces, but it did take like thirteen hours to do. It’s a simplified version of the city where most of my first book takes place. It’s isometric and if you zoom in there is a ton of super small details. I could probably do better now and in half the time, but I’m still proud of this piece. 

I think I was trying to imitate the style in disenchated... needles to say, it looks terrible. 

This piece shows how I am incapable of drawing two characters together because their proportions will not match. Despite that, I still kind of like this one, it’s my protagonist’s father and mother. And Charlotte just looks so cute. 

Proof I can’t draw dragons and don’t understand how to wrap a dragon around another one...

Contradicting myself, proof I can draw dragons. This is my fave drawing ever of Taz (my main character), I love it to pieces, one day I’m going to make it into an acrylic keychain just for me. But,like I said before, I did draw her with yellow stripes because I don’t know how to make things gold with my style.  

Here are two frames from an animatic I made. I’ve made loads of animatics, put hours and hours and hours into them... but, I don’t have any without spoilers for future books so I don’t get to show anybody. It’s a problem of mine. But these two frame are pretty harmless and look at how cute a young Itazu used to be! 

This is probably the best drawing I have of Kai, a character I have struggled to represent for far too long. Sorry about the quality, this was actually part of one big page of sketches where I drew different poses and expression quickly. 

One of the first drawings I did of May while figuring out her design. It stuck. I love it. She looks really cute in this. 

Onto some watercolour... this was supposed to be the first scene Itazu and Kai met in the book (I say supposed to, it is)... and it’s exactly what I mean when I say some art just doesn’t work! So much went wrong here I don’t even know where to start. I really am not good at scenes. 

Another attempt at dragon wrapping around a person... again, better than the last but no... haven’t figure this out yet. Give me time. Space. More are supplied and perhaps a little more talent and I may get there one day. 

And to finish on a positive this is my fave watercolour drawing of Taz! Look at her! She is on fire, literally and I love it. Love the lighting, love the affect, love her clothes, love her hair. I just love it. I’d say I wish very drawing I did looked like this one, but then it wouldn’t be a highlight. 

And there you go! I have way more art than this, maybe I’ll upload more to here sometimes. 

[astoldbygingersnaps]

Harper’s 2020 Fic Wrap-Up

my very good friend and incredibly talented felow writer @sagemoderocklee came up with the idea of doing an end of the year fic wrapup in an attempt to polish the turd known as 2020, and since i actually managed to get some writing done this year i figured, why not jump on the bandwagon? 

a lot of super duper fucking shitty things happened in 2020, but i will always be proud that in this incredibly chaotic, stressful, and challenging year i managed to produce almost 180k of content (and that’s not even counting the writing i started in 2020 but haven’t published yet). so, to celebrate what’s been a pretty big achievement for me, i wanted to go through the various projects i’ve spent the last twelve months working on and give a preview of my plans for 2021.

let’s jump in!

projects i worked on/completed in 2020:

first off, let’s start with the beast to end all beasts, my personal baby, and honestly probably the reason most people follow me -- star trek au:

something bigger than the sky (shiita; 44,163 words; completed): 

i’ve said this before, but the whole idea for star trek au was literally just a joke between me and my-then girlfriend, now-fiancee, and eternal shiita enabler alexa aka @durintrash (by the way, if you follow me for my fics and you DON’T follow alexa for her corresponding art WHAT, exactly, are you doing with your life????) where i sat in a space-themed diner and said ‘haha imagine itachi as a vulcan.’ but then i blinked and suddenly somehow i’d written the prologue and the first chapter of SBTTS in the span of a week. it’s like i was possessed by a fanfic demon.

it sounds super cheesy but i honestly can’t say enough how important this fic has been to me and how much it’s pushed me to be a more productive and more dedicated writer. previously i spent a lot of time Thinking about writing and occasionally i’d put a few words on the page and then i’d go... do... something... else. but star trek au was the first idea i loved enough that it actually pushed me to write and keep writing and not give up even when i was confronted with things like writer’s block and worry over the quality of my writing. so thank you, star trek au, for being the light in a very dark year for me. 

by the end of SBTTS, i felt like i accomplished everything i wanted to do with the story’s beginning installment: i introduced all the characters and set the groundwork for their development; i showed what life on the corvus was like and how starfleet, the federation, and the universe functioned; and, more than anything, i was able to sketch out both the main protagonists -- itachi and shisui -- with all their strengths and flaws, show their relationship to one another, and hint at how that relationship would progress. 

all the stars are closer (shiita; 75,195 words; completed)

considering how slow i used to be at writing, i thought it would be, like, twelve years before i managed to get to the second part in the series. BUT then covid happened and i half-lost, half-quit my job, and like a lot of people this year i ended up with a lot of free time on my hands. and so, like a fucking demon, i finished this part in two and a half months. 

when i originally planned this part out, i really thought it would be a lot shorter and a lot lighter atmosphere-wise than it turned out. instead, this second section of the story ended up being pretty meaty in terms of length and in subject.

that said, overall, i’m really happy with how ATSAC turned out. i loved the way the characters progressed, how the relationships deepened, and how we were able to see this universe grow bigger and more complicated. and i’m very satisifed with how it set the stage for part three, which takes us to...

lovers alone wear sunlight (shiita; 41,518 words; in progress)

there’s... a lot about this part that i just can’t talk about yet, a) because it isn’t finished and b) because it contains some of the biggest plot points in the entire series thus far. if you’ve been keeping up with the stardates thus far (which i encourage you to do!) you know what part three is leading up to: itachi leaving the corvus and the dissolution of shisui and itachi’s growing relationship. 

with that in mind, i’m... more than a little terrified about writing part three, which is why the third chapter has been languishing in my google drive for months now. (and also why i started not one, but TWO new fics to cope with my writer’s block. whoops.) chapter three is where all the parts come together and shit hits the fan, and i can only hope that everyone will be as excited to read it as i am to publish it. 

next up, the two other projects i began this year:

salvation comes only in our dreams (shiita; canon divergence; 16,835 words; in progress)

for a long time, i’ve wanted to write something that’s actually set in the naruto universe and works to correct a lot of the flaws that i see in the series. there are a lot of things that bother me about naruto, but i think one of the things that frustrates me the most is the really messy and in some ways offensive resolution to the uchiha coup plot thread, and i wanted to write a story that dealt with the complicated themes of the series--imperialism, oppression, genocide, child soldiers--but, like, didn’t suck and completely drop the ball. thus, the massacre au was born. 

my main goal was to tell a story that showed a lot of these characters in ways we’ve never seen them before, specifically itachi. i didn’t want to write itachi as just an idealist who suffers and Suffers AND SUFFERS for konoha yet still remains loyal to the village for some unfathomable reason like he is in the series. i wanted to write an itachi that was sharper, more jaded, and more suspicious of the world around him, but overall was still a good person with a kind heart. and for shisui, well... obviously there’s a lot going on there, too. 

this is easily the darkest story i’ve ever written, and as the plot thickens it will certainly get darker with relationship dynamics that are complicated and unhealthy At Best. i hope that as the story goes on it’s a ride people continue to enjoy, as i was super pleasantly surprised at how popular this fic became (compared to my usual stats, at least) 

oceans between us (shiita; alternate universe; 15,039 words; in progress)

it’s good to know that i continue to be the most ridiculously niche version of myself as yes, i wrote a fucking shiita atonement au. 

with each fic i write i try to have a very specific voice that suits the particular piece and distinguishes it from other stories that include the same characters. for example, star trek au chapters tend to be more fun and light-hearted (especially shisui POV chapters) and lean more into the action movie and sci-fi adventure feel of the star trek universe, while the massacre au is written in a way that’s much heavier and guided by itachi’s emotions and experiences. my main goal with this story was to give it the same romantic, operatic, almost hazy quality that the movie has, which reflects the period setting and also the nature of this grand tragic love story. 

i knew from the beginning that there were going to be a lot of things that i cut from the film in my retelling, like the lola subplot and obviously the setting of pre-wwii england. i also knew i wanted to explore some of the aspects of the film that were implied more than outright stated, like the themes of classism and upper-class privileges. and more than anything i wanted to structure this piece around this idea of tension building and building until it finally snaps and there’s just a world of mess and hurt and loss that affects these two characters in two very different ways. 

also, the sex scene. i haven’t written a sex scene for anything in, like, a decade, so that was a lot of pressure. but i’m happy with how it came out and i think it ended up being an aspect of the story that felt like both a natural progression and necessary to show the affection these two people have for one another.

originally i was just going to end the story with shisui going to jail, but when i told alexa this i genuinely thought she was going to kill me. so, that didn’t happen lmao. but the more i tried to imagine what a second chapter would look like, the more i realized she was right, and it would have been a terrible idea to end the fic there. as for whether or not the final chapter will keep That Ending... who can say?

goals i have for 2021:

finishing lovers alone wear sunlight and, if i’m very lucky, beginning the fourth and second to last part of star trek au (yes, as it currently stands this 160k+ word series is only halfway finished. sorry not sorry)

publishing the next chapter of salvation comes only in our dreams (i don’t know when it will drop. i don’t know anything about this fic. please do not @ me) 

completing oceans between us (the second and final chapter is currently sitting at about 4k words and will probably end up at about 15k in total)

completing and publishing a new fic i’ve started at the very end of 2020, which is the shiita jurassic world au nobody but me and alexa knew they wanted. it’s essentially a 90s romcom with dinosaurs and i cannot Wait to share it. (it’s at about 9k right now and will probably end up being around 20k to 23k in total... maybe...)

FINALLY starting my dream project: the shiita olympics au i’ve been planning for years, where itachi is a figure skater and shisui is a hockey player (i’d like to keep this under 150k but at this point trying to keep my stories at a managable word count is a losing battle)

anyway, that’s it! if you managed to get this far in this very self-indulgent and shameless bit of self promotion, congrats! also, a very big thank you to everyone who’s read my fics, left me kudos and comments, and spent their time on my work, because it really does mean the world to me. 

here’s hoping 2021 is a much healthier and happier year for us all!