#What if man what if

[reinafish]

Guys imagine if in the third movie there’s like cops and one of them is topaz but its more like a reference like a background character and then the fandom goes insane over it what if

[kakusu-shipping]

It’s my blog and I’ll post what I want to even if what I want to post is a Post Mario Movie Mario X Luigi mini fic because it’s my blog and I’ll post what I want to

So far away, and still together.

In which Mario and Luigi move in

“Last box!” Mario called, the loud thud of said cardboard box hitting the floor causing Luigi to flinch. “We’re officially moved in.”

Moved in... Moved in to Toad town, in a world so far away yet just a single pipe from Brooklyn. So far from that apartment they’d grown up in, from their food thief uncles, and mama’s fresh pasta. So far..

Mario’s hand brushed Luigi’s, and the younger flinched, pulling his hand quickly away on reflex.

They’d always been together, Mario and Luigi, as more than just brothers, as long as they could remember. When they were kids it was fine, no one batted an eye. Why was Luigi in Mario’s bed? He’s scared of the dark, and they shared a room anyway. Why does Mario kiss Luigi on the forehead so much? He’s affectionate, let the boy be affectionate.

It wasn’t until Middle school, when their father clonked their heads together, when they’d almost had their first real kiss, when their mother sat them down and talked in her worried, loving voice. She’d explained it like they didn’t know what they were doing, like they were confused, like she’d done wrong by not splitting them sooner.

They got separate rooms after that.

Sense then it got harder. They remained ever the same, but quieter. Secretive. Careful. They didn’t want to disappoint their mother, or get whacked over the head again by their father. They were lucky they were Italian, and affection was the normal between their family. Though somehow it never felt like enough.

“Lu. Luigi. Look at me.” Mario’s hand laced in Luigi’s, there in the living room. Their living room. Their home. Luigi turned to his brother, face red and eyes wet. Here in this house so far away from everything they’d ever know, in a locked house all their own, Mario laid a gentle hand on Luigi’s cheek and pressed his lips over his brother’s.

It wasn’t their first kiss, they’d snuck in a few, and it wasn’t like it’d been forever sense they’d kissed, just earlier today in fact while packing up Luigi’s room they’d exchanged a peck, yet this one. This one. It made Luigi’s leg’s shake.

Luigi wrapped his finger’s around Mario’s overall straps and pressed closer, closer, closer, never close enough. Mario held onto Luigi’s cheeks, bending back into the desk from his bedroom now propped here in their living room, it was all he could do to stop himself from toppling over.

Here in their home Luigi thought this kiss could go on forever and he wouldn’t care. He could run out of breath and keep going. He could starve and still stand there, his lips pressed against his brother’s.

When Mario moved his hands to Luigi’s shoulders and pushed him back, the younger resisted, using Mario’s overalls to pull himself back, pressing back into his lips harder, closer, deeper.

“Lu-” Mario spoke into his brother’s lips, pushing him back again. The older gasped for breath, practically sitting on his old wooden desk.

Luigi found himself snapped out of his trance, immediately retreating three large steps back and he spilled apologizes, wringing his hands together in front of his chest. His cheeks flushed, his eyes stung with tears. He’d gone overboard, he’d always gone overboard. He’s the reason they’d gotten caught in the first place, and nearly gotten caught so many times after. And now here he was, putting Mario at risk again in their brand new home. Why’s he gotta be such a screw up-

Mario’s lips once again pressed to Luigi’s, soft and quick and enough to shut him up. “Deep breath, bro.” He said gently, placing his hand on his brother’s waist, “In and out, nice and slow.”

Luigi took a few steadying breaths before laying his forehead on his brothers shoulder, “I’m sorry..” He shook softly, gripping onto the front of Mario’s overalls.

“For what? Kissin’ the love of you life openly and passionately for the first time in your life? Taking my breath away? Pinnin’ me to my desk like a horn dog?”

“I-I did not PIN you!” Luigi shot up, face deep red as he pushed away from his brother.

Mario chuckled, pulling Luigi back, “You didn’t bend me over the desk kissing at me like you’d never see me again?”

“Shut up!! Shut Up!!!” Luigi slapped his hand over Mario’s face, pushing at him again, “I did not bend you over!!!”

Mario continued to laugh, kissing at Luigi’s hand before scooping him up and spinning them both and toppling onto the couch with Luigi on his lap. The younger buried himself into his brother’s shoulder, ears burning red.

There were boxes to unpack, cleaning and sorting and probably some paper work to be done, but it all could wait.

For now, Mario and Luigi laid comfortably together on their little beat up loveseat they’d bought off some guy in Kings for $250, in their living room, their house, so far away from the little apartment they’d grown up in. So far away, and still together.

[partylikemajima]

What if shadowlord died in Nier's arms like this instead? What if Nier understood him in the last moment? What if???????? Watermark is my ig.

[phantom-shell]

Fiddleford found one of his old shirts

[aznisure]

belly of the beast

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[coffinwoodx]

ok so for those of you who don’t know, there’s this twitter account of a japanese local hero mascot named dentman who went viral recently due to this tweet

but yeah he saw the tweet. and his response went viral as well (which is how i found his account)

and he just has like. hourly posts reminding you to brush your teeth

oh and his rival? his name is mr. mutans. whenever dentman posts he makes a post of his own, ofc

but THAT’S NOT ALL. literally while making this post i found a THIRD ACCOUNT that’s all about taking your meds

safe to say i’m losing my mind

anyway the point of all this was that people are ALREADY beginning to draw them ship art 😭

and the reactions are everything

I CANT ADD ANY MORE IMAGES BUT TRUST ME THIS IS SO FUNNY

toxic one-sided dentman yaoi wasn’t on my 2024 bingo card but it DEFINITELY IS NOW!

[sufficientlylargen]

It always gets me that the name "Gandalf" literally just means "Wand-Elf" or "Stick-Elf". I'm imagining old Gondorians just being like:

Librarian: I saw that weird guy at the library again today.

Guard 1: What weird guy?

Librarian: The old guy with the beard? Kinda elfy-looking, apart from the beard?

Guard 1: Oh, with the big-ass stick?

Librarian: Yeah, looked like he was carrying an entire tree branch.

Guard 2: Yeah, that's the Stick Elf.

Guard 1: Hell yeah, I fuckin' love the Stick Elf.

Librarian: The "Stick Elf"?

Guard 2: He comes by every few years, usually after some weird book or other.

Librarian: Oh. Yeah, he wanted a treatise on goblin breeding habits.

Guard 2: Like, how they have sex? We have books on that?

Librarian: Yeah, turns out we do. I was as surprised as you are.

Guard 1: What'd the Stick Elf need a fuckin' goblin-fuckin' book for?

Librarian: I didn't ask. So you just call him "Stick Elf"?

Guard 2: I mean, he looks kinda elfy and he always has that stick, so, like, yeah.

Guard 1: Dude also has some fuckin' dope pipeweed.

Guard 2: Oh yeah, his pipeweed is awesome.

Librarian: How long has he been coming here?

Guard 2: Oh, for decades. He's, like, super old.

Guard 1: More like fuckin' centuries. Dude's old as balls.

Guard 2: Wait, really?

Guard 1: Yeah, my gran-gran used to talk about him. She loved his pipeweed too.

Librarian: So he's… an immortal pipeweed dealer?

Guard 2: I think he's just, like, a connoisseur. He doesn't sell it or anything. He just always has some really top-notch pipeweed on him.

Archivist: Oh, are we talking about Stick Elf?

Guard 1: Hell yeah we are!

Librarian: You know about the Stick Elf, too?

Archivist: Oh, totally. Stick-Elf's a super chill dude. Gave me some awesome pipeweed when I was maybe 12, and tee-bee-aitch I think I'm still a little buzzed from it.

Guard 1: What'd I tell ya, fuckin' dope pipeweed!

Archivist: Also he's really old.

Guard 1: Old as balls.

Librarian: Yeah, so Éodan and Jenniforomir were telling me.

Archivist: My grandpa used to tell me stories - he said one time he saw Stick Elf enter a smoke-ring contest.

Guard 1: Ooh, I'll bet he kicked fuckin' ass.

Archivist: Apparently the guy made an entire warship out of smoke and it flew around shooting down the other rings.

Librarian: And how much of this "fuckin' dope" pipeweed had your grandfather had by this point?

Guard 1: No no, that's totally plausible. Dude's got weird elf powers and shit for sure.

Archivist: He brought fireworks for the king's birthday one year, too.

Guard 1: Oh fuck, I forgot about those! Fuckin' incredible fireworks! Dragons and knights and glowy trees and shit! I was fuckin' 6 years old or something, they totally blew my mind. Hey Éodan, did you see that shit?

Guard 2: No, I think that's before I lived in Gondor.

Guard 1: Wait, you're not from here?

Guard 2: Oh, no, I grew up in Rohan. We moved here when I was, like, thirteen because my uncle Éojeff said he could get my dad a sweet job. And also that there were houses that didn't smell like horseshit.

Guard 1: Oh shit, are you related to Éojeff and Éosteve who run that æbleskiver stand on Norndîl St?

Guard 2: Yeah, they're my uncles!

Guard 1: Shit, they cook a fuckin' great æbleskiver!

Librarian: Ok, hold up a sec, "Stick Elf" can't possibly be his real name.

Guard 1: Why not?

Librarian: What? You think his parents named him in the hopes that he would carry around a fucking tree when he got older?

Guard 2: Maybe they gave him the tree when he was born!

Archivist: I don't think a baby could carry that stick.

Guard 1: You ever seen a baby hanging onto something? They're hella strong.

Archivist: It's not a strength thing, their hands are tiny. That staff is enormous!

Guard 1: My halberd's bigger 'n I am, I can hold it just fine.

Archivist: You're not a baby.

Librarian: Also why would elf parents name their kid "stick ELF"?! Presumably they know that their kid's going to be an elf!

Archivist: Is he actually an elf? I didn't think they grew beards.

Guard 1: How'd he get old as balls if he's not an elf?

Guard 2: His ears aren't that pointy. Maybe he's just a really old guy? Like, a Numémoriam or something?

Guard 1: Did you just say "Numémoriam"?

Guard 2: Nûnenorman? Munimõrbitan? Y'know, those guys like the king that can get super old.

Guard 1: You mean the fuckin' Númenóreans?

Guard 2: Yeah, the Númenóreums.

Archivist: Even the Númenóreans don't live THAT long.

Guard 1: Plus he carries that fuckin' stick around.

Guard 2: Wait, what does the stick have to do with it?

Guard 1: That's an elf thing. Y'know, trees and shit? Very elfy.

Librarian: Ok, look, but his parents naming him "Stick Elf" would be weird whether or not he's an elf. In fact, it's even weirder if he's not - what human names their kid "elf"?

Archivist: Huh. Yeah, you're right, he probably does have another name.

Guard 2: Yeah, I guess so.

Librarian: He's been coming here for decades and nobody's ever asked his real name?

Archivist: I dunno what to tell you, he's Stick Elf. Even his library card just says 'Stick Elf'.

Guard 1: Fuck yeah, the Stick Elf!

Guard 2: Maybe we could, like, ask him his name sometime?

Guard 1: Hey, look, Elrond's over there. He's old as balls too, maybe he knows?

Guard 2: Oh, we shouldn't interru-

Guard 1: HEY ELROND, YOU'RE OLD AS BALLS, RIGHT? WHAT'S THAT OLD ELF WITH THE STICK'S NAME?

Elrond (coming over): Do you mean an old man cloaked all in grey and blue, leaning on a rough-cut staff, who came to the great library this day?

Guard 1: Yeah, the Stick-Elf!

Guard 2: (Sorry to bother you, sir...)

Librarian: He's got to have a real name besides 'the Stick Elf', right?

Elrond: Indeed, for no elf is he. You speak of the wizard Olórin, wisest of the Maiar, older even than Eä itself. Many are his names in many countries: Tharkûn among the Dwarves; Incánus to the south; Mithrandir he is called among my people, the Grey Pilgrim.

Librarian: Oh.

Elrond: And here in the North he is called Stick-Elf.

Librarian: Oh.

Guard 1: Fuck yeah!

[sparebutton]

(Across the Spider-Verse spoiler)

[tariah23]

White people are miserable, racist losers period. They’ve even been getting mad at Japanese people for correcting them about Yasuke as well.

[jabberwick]

Human Bill Cipher

(Based on Alex Hirsch's "canon" design)

And just to be clear, writing dissertations at me justifying why he should instead be a conventionally attractive twink will involuntarily cause me to draw him with even fewer teeth.

[omgcheez]

[mr-malumm]

Stayed gone but vox narrates his passive aggressive insecure ass scrolling text from the bottom of his broadcast 👊💥📺

[professor-pants]

Genre of character: submissive like a guard dog is submissive

[scrimmiestbingus]

I need someone to do a video essay-length deep dive into how 75% of the BG3 fandom fell so hard for Astarion's manipulative seductor act that they believe that's his actual personality. This man has to practice his lines and still fumbles them constantly. He flat-out says it's all a front because he believes his sex appeal is the only reason anyone would keep him around, which is tragic. When he drops the act, he becomes this kind of silly man rediscovering what it means to be himself, and what it means to both love and be loved. He says "I'm all pointy ears, love." while turning his head to show off those pointy ears. Let him be silly, let him be awkward! It's so much more authentic then him being a walking innuendo.

He has a mid charisma stat with a bonus for deception and rolled a nat 20 on all y'all.

[normal-thoughts-official]

donated 50 reais to a palestinian GFM today

it amounted to 8 dollars

several days' worth of expenses for me became a single digit donation for them. barely enough for a blanket. just like that

it really sucks to know that my money is inherently less helpful no matter how much it'd pay for me, and there's nothing i can do