“if lovin’s wrong, what’s a boy to do ? i ain’t scared of death, i’m scared of losin’ you. you ain’t outta my league, yer outta this planet—but dammit, if you ain’t drilled into my skull”
Is it weird that I’m hoping Conageddon will somehow spark my creativity and finally break through my writer’s block? Yes, probably, but I’m getting desperate at this point, so if you’re attending (lucky 😉), please post ALL the content possible.
Set in The Witcher universe, The Witcher: Blood Origin takes place in an elven world 1200 years before the time of Geralt. The 4-part series “will tell a tale lost to history: the creation of the first prototype Witcher, and the events that led to the pivotal Conjunction of the Spheres, when the worlds of monsters, men, and elves merged to become one.” (Netflix)
Brenda, a woman born with half a leg is competing in a bike race with her sort of friends Donavan and Sarah. Sarah has a fear of speed (not the drug) and Donavan wants to beat his father who's also competing. He sells weapons and is possibly a terrorist. The flautist, cellist, and timpanist are talking about loud floral patterns and not being appreciated enough. They're a part of the New York City Philharmonic but instead of performing for sold out audiences they're performing for an amateur race. They decide to start a band together called Soundgarden. Donavan's father is approached by a man who wants to guy a grenade from him. He argues with his husband/business partner Devin, who's beautiful but also very incompetent. The grenade has an Irish accent that you can listen to for 20 seconds at a time by pulling the pin and then putting it back. The Russian guy is charmed and buys it. Meanwhile Brenda's knee starts talking to her and she grows a bunch of sentient limbs. Soundgarden sings Black Hole Sun, a tango. The cellist drops his cello and it breaks open and he finds a secreted Russian communication dossier. The other musicians finds dossiers in their instruments. Soundgarden is arrested for treason. Donavan kicks his father 9 times, one for each of the bills in the bills of rights (they skipped the right to bear arms). Devin and Donovan's father are taken to jail. The sentient coat and the Irish grenade sing a love ballad before the grenade blows up. It turns out the grenade was filled with confetti because Devin was really high when he bought all the weapons. Devin and Donovan's dad decide that they never committed a crime and take off their handcuffs. Everyone wins the arms race.
Best quotes:
• "I have a fear of speed"
"I took it once"
• "You never know just what you're blowing, do you?"
• "One day I'll kill everyone in the musical"
Best songs:
• Garden of Sound
Thoughts Overall:
Jess's Russian accent makes the ladies swoon. That's the thought. This episode is a very weird fever dream involving nuclear weapons and talking Irish grenades and sentient knees and coats. And bikes. So many bikes. Plus Zach wants to kill everyone in the musical and Jess wants women with too many limbs to be happy
Wednesday, September 27, 2023 12pm ET: New Music Show
New music this week from: Zach Bryan, Bleachers, Tommy Charles, Tano Jones Revelry, Boy From The South, Dolly Parton, David Kusher, Norman Collins, Fences and more….