#a longing for something or someone that is viewed as unattainable or unable to return affections

[karlrose]

thinking about the statue scene in puppeteer 2.

thinking about it's possible connection to the story of Pygmalion and Galatea.

just thinking.......

[lunargrapejuice]

a lanterns wish

diluc ragnvindr x fem!reader | 3.5k+ words

fluff, first kiss + love confession, reader is from liyue, reader described as shorter than diluc

in the busying streets of liyue it was the click of your shoes against the stone path that calmed your rising nerves, eased your grip on the fabric of your outfit. steadying and grounding with every step you took towards the outskirts of the busy stalls to await your friends.

you loved this time of year, liyue in full lantern rite. the city twinkles with gold and reds, encased in a dream-like glow that wafts with the smells of delicious food and the happiness of the entirety of liyue. it was something you wanted to share with the cherished friends you had made in mondstadt after having spent so much time traveling between the two places, falling in love with the city of freedom and the uncrowned king that watched over it.

diluc was exactly who had your heart set to an unsteady beat now, unable to focus on the games and festivities happening at booths around you when you were both eager and anxious to see him. it has been a few weeks since you returned from mondstadt last and even though you received a letter from him not long ago and knew he would be coming to liyue for lantern rite, it was so easy to miss him from the second you parted ways at stone gate. it wasn’t the first time he had been to liyue to see you either but you’d be lying if you said you weren’t nervous for him to come this time, to see you in a traditional liyue attire that nigguang had helped you pick out, elegant and flowy and tailored to perfection. 

and the last time you had seen him.. your feelings had been so obvious.  they were on the tip of your tongue, begging to be said when your heart could not hold them in any longer. so how were you to possibly continue to hold onto them with him so close to you the entire night? 

you didn’t have more time to overthink it before you’re brought from your thoughts by the call of your name and a familiar face cutting through the crowd to get to you, though not dressed in his guard uniform and with his hair down he did look significantly different, a bodyguard at the jade chamber zhenhai. 

he was someone you often ran into when you were with nigguang and he always seemed keen on striking a conversation with you. you didn’t mind, he was nice and your friend trusted him even after reluctantly hiring him.

“hello miss,” he greets you with a smile, standing in front of you with his hand at the back of his neck. 

“hey, zhenhai. having a good lantern rite?”

had you been more focused on him and not on looking for bright red amongst the people around you, you may have heard how he was actually enjoying the rite or caught the pink tint to his cheeks, the bashful way he looks at you. but all you could focus on, all you had been thinking about for days, was the man you longed to see. in all of his unattainability that couldn’t stop your heart from falling.

“so nigguang gave you the night off?” you ask after half hearing but not quite processing his words over your thoughts. “is your cousin joining you?”

“yeah we’re supposed to be meeting up,” he rubs his neck, not meeting your gaze. “would.. you like to join us?”

“i’m actually-”

you’re interrupted by a yell of your name that draws the attention of many around you, all eyes coming to land on an unbothered cavalry captain giving you a wide smile. next to kaeya was his ever quite the opposite brother, head shaking with a hand covering his face from view but as soon as his ruby eyes come from behind his dark gloves, they find yours, freezing the entire world for but a moment before another yell of your name, joyful and childlike, draws you away.

klee breaks away from albedos hand with ease, dressed in an embroidered outfit with her hair in pigtails, little feet running full speed at you until she’s grabbing your outstretched hand and jumping in front of you. “i missed you!”

“i missed you too,” you bend down to her height and her arms immediately fling around your neck, her body still bouncing with joy in your arms. “we’re gonna have lots of fun, huh?”

“oh, yeah! albedo said we could try all the games,” she lets go of you, looking back at the three men that are now nearly to you. 

all of them are looking handsome dressed in traditional liyue clothes. kaeya with a beautiful pin in his hair, glistening in the evening sun like flawless ice and blue garments that suited his regular stye. albedo matching with klee in gold and white ascents of their clothes and the embroidered pattern on the fine cloth but he had opted for blue instead of red in the color throughout. and diluc.. he stole your breath away with just one glance and you knew you weren’t the only ones staring at the gorgeous winery owner. you had expected the dark color he chose but you found your eyes drawn to the details of white throughout the long garment and the red around his slim waist. 

diluc himself had no doubt that you would look stunning tonight. he had always found you breathtaking but right now, he didn’t have words to describe how he saw you or the air in his lungs to attempt to form any of them. his heart was in his throat, burning at such intensity he’s sure kaeya could feel the slight change in temperature around them, and knows exactly what it’s from. that smug bastard. 

he had looked the part as well. kaeya was already quite enjoying himself after seeing such an intense and odd look on his brother's face when they spotted you standing there with a blushing man who looked as if he might be about to confess his love. or at least that’s what kaeya teased diluc about what was likely happening, aware of his brother's feelings, but it hadn’t not gone as planned when the slight shift in dilucs demeanor made kaeya feel like an ass. 

so, with a promise to be the best wingman ever, much to dilucs protests, kaeya took matters into his own hands when he instructed klee to yell your name along with him and go say hello, adding the unamused glare that most did not see on the knight unless you were also seeing his blade, plus the one diluc often wore that was even worse at the present moment, till the man scurried off without as much as saying goodbye to you. 

it wouldn’t be the only time tonight diluc piercing gaze tore gazes from you.

the uncomfortable tightness in the pyro users chest that bloomed when kaeya spoke of another wanting to covet your heart had subsided from the moment your eyes met and, as you often had for him, the rest of his worries and the noise of the busy world around him began to fade as he stood before you. as if you were the only two in the world. leaving him nothing more than the darkest corners of the shadows that reached for the moonlight without ever connecting. he was desperate to reach out and pull you into him, scarred hands aching at his side when you’re only an arms length away.

“i’m so happy you’re all here!” you exclaim, your smile making dilucs chest burst into sparkling pyro crystal flies, crackling with embers of fire in their flutter, knocking against his rib cage. “you all look so wonderful too,” you try not to sound too choked up about it but really, you couldn’t be happier to share today with them like this.

“well we couldn’t deny our dear miss y/n when you so kindly invited us, could we diluc?” kaeya replies, elbowing diluc in the side.

diluc clears his throat quietly, the back of gloves hiding half his face from view, eyes avoiding. the crystal flies in the cage of his ribs ignite and burn all the way to his cheeks and the tips of his ears, his pearl-like skin matching his lovely hair. kaeya was certainly the worst wingman and diluc hadn’t even agreed to it in the first place. brothers, he internally grumbles. 

he ignores kaeya completely when he talks to you, looking back up and dropping his hand to his side. the soft expression he often wore with you still warm. “thank you for inviting us.”

you refuse to let yourself believe the slightest pink dusting his cheeks has anything to do with you no matter how desperately you want it to be true. don’t want to bring attention to the butterflies in your stomach at his compliment. tonight you knew you should focus on having fun with your friends, not spilling your heart out to diluc. 

“there’s a lot to see so should we get going?”

“yeah!” klee exclaims, kaeya laughing behind her but is quick to keep up with her, albedo following after at a faster pace.

“don’t go running of on your own klee-”

“wait,” dilucs voice stops you from following, reaching his hand out to stop you but so easily his voice alone coaxes you to stop in your tracks and look at him. in a few long strides he’s next to you, tugging on the end of his glove. you had to look up to see him but you never minded. his eyes that hid under thick lashes for only a moment before finding you, shining like rubies in the evening sunlight and reflecting back at him in your own when he speaks. “you look beautiful-”

neither of you get a moment to do or say more, to think or process the warmth blooming throughout your body when you’re torn from it all too quickly. klee and kaeyas voices come at the same time.

“come on guys!” 

“you don’t want to get left behind.”

but maybe it was for the best because when you look at diluc and smile, still tingling with shy happiness at his compliment, offering him a sweet ‘thank you’ before he leads you towards your awaiting friends, you can only hope you’ll have more moments like this with him.

with klee leading the way, albedo practically surgically attached to her hand and kaeya hot on their heels, you spend the evening so very close to diluc, going from stall to stall, playing games, eating treats and listening to the stories being told of soldier making their way home by lantern light and those lost in the archon war who will never be forgotten.

while you taught or helped klee the games and puzzles diluc still kept close, welcoming you back into his space with a soft tug of his lips and the softening of his eyes. it made your knees feel weak, never failing to flush your cheeks, but you couldn’t resist the warmth of him at this proximity, the scent of wine and oak barrels that clings to him, the heat of his palm that from time to time that hovers over the small of your back but only connects with the silky fabric of your clothes to guide you away from people not paying attention to where they were going, to keep you safe

diluc was always careful to be sure everyone around him was safe, though it was only your side he stuck by the entire night.

trying the different food stalls, wanting to eat a bit of each instead of a big meal at one, you had opted to split the treats you ordered, every half of yours ending up in dilucs hand, against his lips that your eyes could not stop going back to you. when you fed him a bite of almond tofu that couldn’t be split like the others, with his cheeks ablaze and long lashes fluttering closed with the single bite he could get through before giving you a polite ‘no thank you’ from behind his hand, you apologized profusely but he was assuring it was quite alright and the food was delicious.

it was like you had forgotten it wasn’t just the two of you here and even though you were still very aware of how much diluc did not usually prefer the proximity of others, it felt so natural to be this close to him. it always had and he had always let you into his space, small steps at a time. your actions might have been something you spent the evening overthinking more than you’d like to admit but your worries quickly melted when he kept you close and walked with you to where kaeya, klee and albedo were a little ways ahead of you.

by the time the sun had long been set and the moon showed high in the sky, the cool breeze from the sea after the eventful evening was just what everyone needed and with your lanterns in hand, it was your turn to lead your group to the place you felt best to release them into the sky and make your wishes. you brought them to a quiet part of the city not far from the docks, away from the biggest of the crowds but still basking in the golden light and the bubbling hope for the new year sent off with every star-like glow in the sky.

you weren’t sure how she still had energy after hours of running around the harbor but klee hopped on her toes, small hands determined to not let the lantern go before she was ready as diluc bent down to bring it to life, lighting it with his vision. her face lit up with wonder and while everyone else was watching the spark knight, you were watching diluc smiling down at her, like you might imagine he did more often before the passing of his father. like you were seeing more and more on him as of late as the steady flame in the lantern cast against his handsome features.

it made your heart contract and when it came back to normal, your entire being tingled with your love for him.

he looks up at you, like he had felt your gaze, those scarlet eyes look like the purest of flames in the gold light. without a doubt, he is the most amazing and handsome man you had ever seen, the man you loved, and you can’t bring yourself to look away even if the look on his face, one you couldn’t read, made you want to shy away. still, you gift him a smile, tender and sweet.

“ready?” you ask, holding up the two lanterns you had been holding when he returns to your side, hoping the darkness is hiding the emotions you swear are painted so clearly on your face. how could they not when you were constantly overwhelmed by them in the best of ways.

“let’s go.”

you follow in step with him a little ways from the others, no words spoken between you as he lights both of your lanterns and you prepare your wishes. silence between you has always been comfortable but right now you wonder if he can hear the physical aching of your longing heart in the quietness. the longer you stood there thinking about the very wish that stood next to you, as far away as the stars in the sky but what you needed more than air, it seems to echo in your ears as you let go of your lantern, shaking your lungs and forcing you to release the breath you hadn’t known you’d be holding.  

at the release of your breath, diluc tears his eyes from you without you having seen how lost he was in the image of you, the city and night sky twinkling with stars and lanterns a backdrop to your beauty, to his heart that was becoming unbearably heavy in his chest being away from yours. he was awestruck and felt tonight he had felt the final strike to the wall holding his barely held together emotions, the one that he had built and fortified for years crumbling for you and you alone, leaving his heart bare for you.

could you accept a cold and broken man such as him? would you trust him with your heart in return?  he would give his life to protect it.

when you look up at him, diluc is still holding onto his lantern, focused on it, a flickering flame showing an unreadable look on his face, his slightly chapped lips, his eyes looking up at the sky, bangs brushing against his face in the small breeze.

it’s only when he releases the lantern, with both of your eyes watching it float nearer to yours, that you break the silence. 

“what kind of things does the dark knight hero wish for?” you ask, expecting him to grumble or comment on the stupid name he’s been given, though you think it suits him well.

but he doesn’t. he doesn’t say anything at first and the silence draws your attention back to him and it’s then you realize he’s looking right at you, so close you can feel his natural heat and the faintest releases of his breath. it would take no effort at all to reach out and touch the tendrils of his hair or his lips pinks and archons you want to. you might even have had it not been for the look he gave you that stopped every function of your body. diluc looked at you as if you were the only thing in this world. like he needed you and with the familiarity of a man who has steeled his resolve.

“.. would you believe me if i said you?”

“m-me?”

he calls your name, the way it sounds coming from his lips always making you yearn for more of him when you thought he could never be yours but now, it’s like it was the most sacred word he had ever said, salvation for a sinner once lost in darkness, that still lived there but could no longer live without you and so desperately wanted to protect you from that with followed him.

the warmth of his hand finds yours, scarred and calloused and no longer covered by leather, strong but soft. you both move to face each other, nearly chest to chest, sharing every inhale of cool night air. he had to tell you. there was no more holding back. no more pressing down the lid of his emotions that constantly spilled over regardless of his strength. no more pretending like this wasn’t what lay within his very soul. there would be no one else trying to covet your heart.

your eyes flutter closed at a comfortable pressure on your forehead, the tickle of crimson hair and a closeness to diluc you would never get enough of.

“i do not just wish for you, i need you and i cannot hold my feelings back any longer,” his words are deep, delicate, nearly whispered against your skin because with every passing second you did not deny him he was closing the distance between you, pressing you against his chest with a hand at your back, your own clinging to him, lost in hair hair and against his clothes. he says your name again. “i love you. with all that i am.-”

“diluc..” your voice choked, tears brimming your eyes, hands shaking in disbelief but the thump of his heart under your palm that beat in sync with your own told you it was real. so very real. “i love you too.”

his forehead lifts from yours and you can barely stand to be this far from him now. nor can you help the tears spilling past your eyes, your emotions crashing into you like waves, engulfing you both while diluc held you steady. you knees were so weak but with his strength he never let you fall, never let you slip from his grasp and he felt his chest rise and fall with deep breaths at the way you cling to him.

“may i kiss you?”

“please.”

his kisses you soft, delicate, as if to not break you but when your arms wrap around his neck, one of his hands cradling the back of your head, lost in your hair, the other at the small of your back keeping you against him, he deepens the kiss. pressing his lips to yours with passion and the truth of his feelings. you return every movement in earnest and he doesn’t know how he’ll be able to return to mondstadt without you when the time comes but right now, and for as long as you’ll have him, he would hold you close, kiss your breathless, bask in your love that he did not deserve but that he could not deny himself from knowing you love him too.

genshin impact masterlist | main masterlist

[thueenz]

been thinking about reincarnation a lot lately. well i have been for years but especially these past few days. in an irl context continuing my recent trend of posting about this stuff, bc i do believe in reincarnation very fully. but just thinking about it. i love love. love that persists for so long. i have a lot of experiences with reincarnation. meeting people, trying to meet people, trying very hard sometimes. succeeding more easily sometimes than others. various people. a lot of people view reincarnation as this distant wonder, but i dont. its just love, love that persists, love that returns to you time and time again. to know someone like the back of your hand still and have it just on the tip of your tongue unable to fully recall. but the love remains. its natural and attainable and varies from person to person but it isn't some distant wonder or unattainable dream. 'i love you so much i want to see you again, i will see you again' is such a natural and easy thing to create sometimes. its as natural as breathing. love persists. it doesnt have to be hard. it doesnt have to be out of reach. something as simple as finding a pet you once knew, in this life or another, a friend, a lover. why make it hard? i so wholly believe that love is everywhere and in all of us. in my mind to believe in reincarnation yet keep it at a tentative distance is such a disheartening thing to do. and ive done it. but love is natural. 'i love you and i will find you again, i love you so much that i want to see you again, and share a life with you again'. it isnt hard. it shouldnt be. i love you so much it fills me with joy to see you again. i love you

[council-of-readers]

Most Notorious

Request: Would you do a male!reader x William (I'm assuming you mean pre-vampire, so late 1850's?) where reader is an upper class bachelor who revels in scandal just for the rebellion of it. I'm talking about a queer man who reads banned books while perched in a tree kind of rebellious guy. The poetic, intellectual type with more confidence than he needs trying to woo this timid blonde poet in the botanical gardens kind of fic. Idk if that's what you're looking for, but I desperately want to read that kind of fic.

This made my little gay heart so happy to write.

He was ethereal. Intangible. Unattainable.

No soul had ever seemed so beautiful to him before. Speaking with him left William feeling dazed and weak, and hungry for more. It wasn't right, he knew. If he was being honest with himself, that was part of the draw he had. Forbidden fruit, if you will. A man wholly unlike any other he had met. Besides himself.

William sat on the couch and watched him from across the party. He stood in the corner and watched the other party goers socialize, content to simply stand to the side and observe. It was a contentedness William envied. He didn't seem to care about standing or appearances. Opting to follow his own path and do as he pleased. That ability was mind boggling. To have no worries about how he was perceived, following his passions on a whim, and of course, the rumours about who he took to bed. All without paying mind to the whispers.

William stared in awe. He couldn't wrap his head around it. Around him.

Lost in his thoughts, he failed to notice that his stare had been returned. When William came back to reality, he was gone. He was looking around, trying to see where he'd wandered off to, when he felt a weight sink into the couch next to him. His heart sank in turn.

"Enjoying yourself?" the young man asked with a smirk, causing William to flush.

"Well, I, um…" he stumbled over his words. This was the first time they'd actually spoken.

He laughed, "I assumed you weren't, given the fact you are sitting here, alone, staring at strangers. Which, I don't mind. I've had worse looking men watch me."

If William wasn't red before, he certainly was now. He couldn't help the smile that crept onto his face.

"No, I don't think I am. These things are rarely entertaining for me."

His honesty surprised him, and evidently surprised the other man as well.

"Oh? Is that so?"

He panicked. This might have been a trap. A way to get William to admit something to further ruin his standing. He stood up and adjusted his coat frantically. He felt a hand on his shoulder.

"It's alright, William."

His heart skipped a beat at the sound of his name.

He took a long look around the room and gestured sarcastically, "Does this really seem like the type of place I'd enjoy being? I know we haven't ever officially met, however I'm also well aware this isn't the only social function you've spent observing me."

He let out a sigh of relief, but was still unable to fully relax. The situation was new to him, and he hadn’t quite figured out how he was supposed to act around this stranger.

"What would you say if I were to suggest we head out somewhere? Anywhere other than here. If you have suggestions, I'm more than open to them."

William nodded, "I think I'd like that very much."

He grinned and motioned for William to follow him out of the party.

His cheeks burned as the conversation around them slowed. He dreaded the rumours that'd be flying. The horrifying thought that his mother might catch wind of them made his stomach churn. She was an open minded woman, but it would hurt her heart to hear he was consorting with someone who was held in such a negative regard. It'd make it near impossible to find a wife.

Though, it wasn't like that search was going well anyhow.

They left the house and went out into the street. Night had already fallen hours ago, so they were almost entirely alone. He felt safe despite this. He didn't get the impression his companion sought to harm him.

"Where are we going?" William asked.

He just smiled, "You'll see. It's but a 20 minute walk, don't fret. We will have to take a short cut, if that's alright with you."

"Oh, um, yes that's… that's quite alright."

"Good."

They walked in silence for a while. The night air was cool, far more so than usual, and William felt himself shake despite the jacket he wore. The other man took notice.

"Cold?" He asked, smirking.

William didn't know what was so amusing.

"A bit. It's no trouble, though."

He sighed melodramatically and took off his own jacket, offering it to William. He smiled, softer and more genuine now, "If it doesn't fit over top of your own, you can just wrap it around your shoulders. It's no fun seeing such a handsome man shiver."

That damned blush was back.

William accepted and pulled the jacket over him. It just barely fit over his clothes. Something occurred to him, and he felt a little ridiculous that he hadn't thought to ask it previously.

"Um, if I may, what should I call you?"

He burst into laughter, “Are you quite serious, William? You went with me despite not even knowing my name? Am I that good looking?”

He took a moment to collect himself before answering, still chuckling a little bit, “It’s (y/n). You can call me whatever you’d like, though. I don’t much care. We’re almost there, by the way.”

William smiled at (y/n) and followed him as his pace picked up. Mud flicked up against his shoes, staining their pale leather. He found himself apathetic to this, however, much preferring to follow the enchanting man in front of him. He moved with such grace. The terrain hardly seemed to bother him, and even when a stray stone caught his foot, he regained his balance without a break in his stride.

He was so enraptured with (y/n) he failed to pay attention to the scene in front of him. His eyes widened when he saw what the road led to. There were lush green trees and a wide array of shrubbery surrounding a gorgeous white gazebo. Flowers ran up the sides of the wooden beams that supported it, wrapping around the handrails and reaching up to the roof. It was a scene out of a fairytale.

(y/n) laughed again at his expression, "Liking the view?"

He didn't wait for a response from William.

"I was sure you would," he walked up to the gazebo and gently traced the edges of a flower bud with his finger. "You seem like you'd… appreciate this. Like me. The flowers really are beautiful, aren't they? I wish they were carnations, though. Don't you?" His voice was soft and vulnerable. Trusting.

His words were loaded, William could tell. He walked up and cautiously reached out his hand. His anxiety rose. What if he was misreading the situation? Misreading his meaning? It took him a split second too long to respond, and William began to pull his hand back in shame. (y/n) smiled at him and took it, interlocking their fingers. He ran his thumb across Williams' knuckles and hummed quietly.

"Thank you. I had hoped I'd assumed correctly. I'd be horribly embarrassed if I hadn't."

William cocked his head, "I wouldn't have taken you for the kind to get embarrassed at anything."

He let out a light snort, "I'm not. Usually."

They both avoided eye contact for the moment. Preferring to simply enjoy the others' presence. It was peaceful. And he was beautiful.

They both found themselves thinking that.

[aroworlds]

Love in the House of the Ravens Part Ten

After seven years in Rajad, Darius has fallen out of love with the unattainable and failed to fall in love with the companionate. When the right person offers a romantic relationship and he doesn’t understand why yes won’t grace his tongue, the only thing an autistic man can do is ask the Ravens--and hope he can survive the word they give him in return.

Content Advisory: Discussion of the intersectionality between autistic-targeted ableism and amatonormativity and the ways said ableism make more difficult an acceptance of aromantic identity. This section includes ableism/abuse, assault and self-harm and/or wound mentions.

Links: Tag | Previous

He arranges the spoon flush across the empty bowl, careful to avoid clunking the metal against the crockery. “There’s … maybe that explains, but I can’t. I can ask more questions, but that … that might make it real, and I can’t…” Darius shakes his head. If he can’t agree, even when this may be more right to him than the word he couldn’t give Harlow, maybe he can explain why he’s so unable. “Outside here … what I feel and know, it’s … I’m all upside down and sideways, large over things rightly small, small over things rightly large. Feelings are all upside down and sideways. People tell me I can’t trust what I feel, what I think, me. But then I’m supposed to do that, sometimes; I’m supposed to trust. Just not most of the time. How…?” He presses his lips together, his eyes burning. “How do I know when to trust what I feel and when not to? Are you right or am I feeling things wrong? How do I know?”

He doesn’t know if he’s talking to himself or Ila. Neither does he care. One thing feels sure and certain: everything else—Harlow, asking the Ravens, letting Ila guide him to an answer and accepting hir response—will be so much easier if he sheds his divergence.

He shouldn’t feel that way. This confusion is less about him and more about the damage caused by the world’s views on what makes the right, valid shape of human. He knows better than to bow to the world’s belief that autistics shouldn’t exist at all. He knows better than to bow to the request to hide his divergence so none else are inconvenienced by it. He knows better than to lose himself in trying to mimic someone else’s personhood. He shouldn’t feel that way, because there’s nothing right or reasonable in what the world, outside this precious room, asks of him.

Understanding doesn’t halt Darius from wishing for it nonetheless.

Ila perches on the edge of the bed before resting one long, narrow hand on Darius’s shoulder, hir fingers flat and hir touch heavy. “A word isn’t a gift when forced on you. A word isn’t a gift if you can’t discard it. Keep it, or not, as you want.”

Darius heaves a shaking breath and leans into Ila’s chest, breathing in the warm smells of skin and soap; ze leaves hir hand resting on his arm and runs the other through his damp curls, finger-combing just hard enough to pull. “My … my family says that gender, names, are gifts. I can give back femininity. But Oma yells when I won’t wear clothes she gave me. I don’t … decide, what’s right to give back. Not me.”

Guilt grabs him as soon as the last word slips from his tongue. If Akash is a brash protector, given to amusement and outrage in equal measure, Ila is the priest, patiently accepting and valuing Darius’s need for honesty. They’re as kind a people as he ever hoped to find in a world where even those who are “good” rarely manage to voice compassion free of condescension.

He can’t take this word, aromantic, even when he thinks it may, will or should ring true.

He can’t take Ila’s words as a gift, even when he knows that spirit to be true.

Darius should trust what he feels, except when he can’t because everything he knows and feels doesn’t fit the shapes of difference become allowably human.

One identity, divergence, shouldn’t be so entwined through all the others.

“I know,” Ila murmurs, hir voice soft, hir fingers firm. Neither tortures him with the featherlight touches that set his skin afire, however well-intended their gentleness. Just the pressure and the weight that lets him relax into something as complicated as touch. “But you can give anything back to me. Anything. You don’t have to explain as if it’s an apology for not accepting. You don’t have to explain why.”

Where else can he go? The only place better for a divergent man is the College, but how can he go back when he’s no longer a child? Where else can he be so comfortably different that aromantic needn’t feel dangerous?

He exhales, shaking, and looks down at his forearms. The sleeve of his robe rides up far enough on his left forearm that he can see the first of the new cuts, raw and pink against the skin. Less shocking, now, than the pinkish-white scars framing it, scars starting to take on age’s translucence. The lessons March taught didn’t protect him from bullies in the world outside, and Darius doesn’t regret his sacrifices when the gain is something closer to safety—even if Akash won’t pretend acceptance.

At least here he needn’t pretend that his feelings for the people he cares about aren’t uncomplicated.

He breathes out, long and slow. “Can that be enough? For now, tonight? Can we … something else?” Darius hesitates, thinking he should ask Akash and Ila about their lives, but he struggles with those sorts of conversations; they don’t ring naturally on his tongue, however sincere his intentions. Between all the things Darius thinks impolite to ask and all the things other people expect him to ask, not to mention the things Darius wants to discuss and the inane things other people insist on discussing, he finds himself scrabbling to identify the suitable middle ground for polite small talk. “Can I ask about … the stick insect, maybe…? Can I ask about that?”

Ila snorts and waves hir freest hand at Akash. “You tell him that one!”

[bubblesthemonsterartist]

for the rare pair series have you ever talked about shirayuki x kiki? shirayuki has a crush on her but how would they get toghetter?

OH NONNY. I HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR SOMEONE. ANYONE. TO ASK ME THIS QUESTION. I was beyond surprised when no one requested this pairing when I started doing meta for rare pairs last summer, BUT THAT’S OKAY because last year I didn’t have HALF of the beautiful canon content I have to work with now.

LET’S DO THIS

I mean, first off, to say that Shirayuki has a crush on Kiki is the biggest

understatement

of the

century.

But I think it’s also fair to propose that the feelings are mutual. I mean, Kiki expressions of affection are very…. muted due to a lot of bullshit surrounding her upbringing. Like Zen, she can’t rely on people being sincere with her and has even less opportunity to experiment with people being decent as she is a woman as well as the sole heir to her family’s name. 

However, when Kiki does let someone in, her expressions of love might not be as showy as Shirayuki’s, but they ARE very much there. I mean,

This is as close as we get to a confession of feeling affection towards anyone in early canon. Kiki is just as torn up as everyone else about Shirayuki leaving, maybe even moreso. And, up until this most recent arc (post Mitsuhide rejection), she has been so removed from her own emotions that she has no idea how to help others with theirs. 

Like in this scene, Kiki clearly goes out of her comfort zone to help, but doesn’t have the tools to actually be of assistance. So instead of being selfish by thinking that she can handle it when she cannot, she ends up outsourcing this conversation to the person she thinks can do this best: Zen. (Mitsuhide was her first thought, though. That poor man is everybody’s teddy bear XD) 

And then, the very next morning, we get this gorgeous scene where Kiki takes initiative to overcome her own personal difficulty with affection because she wants to make sure that Shirayuki feels loved as she leaves for Lyrias.

In later reunions, too, you see this slow warming, like an newly born baby fawn tripping all over itself to learn how to walk. But instead of awkward, you get super hot moments like this

and THIS:

(I see you over there, Kiki. Wanting to play with Shirayuki’s HAIR. I know what your game is about :3 )

And let’s not forget that a certain SOMEONE was recently caught watching Shirayuki sleep!

IT IS CANON

The only real difference between Shirayuki’s exuberant crush and Kiki’s quieter one is that Kiki was born and bred to exude grace and we are almost viewing her through the unattainable perfection goggles Shirayuki is constantly wearing.

Now I know what you may be thinking. KIKI IS ENGAGED, RIGHT? SHE’S GONNA HAVE TO GET MARRIED.

Well, hold on a second.

Yes, Kiki is currently engaged to Hisame, but I’d say she has something up her sleeve. Something that she is going to be able to use to prevent herself from having to get married at all. And there are a handful of things that make me think this.

1) She left without telling Shirayuki of her engagement. 

2) She has gotten a lot more emotive since Mitsuhide rejected her, especially when she’s around Shirayuki. So much so that Shirayuki has commented on it. And part of me thinks the reason for that is she is feeling strangely free. If someone had asked her at the beginning of this story that she would be cool with Mitsuhide’s rejection, Kiki probably wouldn’t have believed them. But here’s the thing: Kiki experienced that horrible freedom of going for what she wanted, and having it blow up in her face (I mean, did you really have to explain things to her TWICE, Mitsuhide???)

She failed. And she knows now that after a lifetime of being told that she has to be perfect, it wasn’t the end of the world to be rejected. The sun still rose, her father still loves her, everyone is still her friend, and the world continued to move on as if nothing happened. 

And maybe, just maybe, Kiki can now acknowledge that Mitsuhide may have been what she desired once, but… not anymore. (Also, please note that she said she left one earring at home because she wanted to feel a connection, but in front of Shirayuki she said maybe she didn’t need to wear one anymore)

And 3) This scene. These are legit some of the most beautiful Kiki panels in existence so let’s just appreciate them in silence for a moment:

I said when it came out, and I’ll say it now: Kiki came to a decision in that scene. Her best laid plan went awry, but she was incredibly okay about it. Maybe a little shook that things weren’t going the way she wanted them to, but it ultimately came off as more of an inconvenience than anything else (and maybe, just maybe, Kiki knows she went for him because she knew Mitsuhide was one of those rare men in her world who would not try to force her to be something that she is not. Not to say that she doesn’t love him, but she confused a deep sense of familial love with someone she was not related to and equate that to romantic love).

WITH ALL THAT SAID, here’s the headcanon you actually requested, nonny:

Kikiyuki is endgame. But not in the way that you would expect.

Rather that Kiki pulling a dramatic move like riding up on a white horse and whisking Shirayuki away in front of Zen and Obi’s slack jawed faces, she goes for the long game. Because this isn’t a decision one makes on their own. Shirayuki has to choose, too. 

And in this story, Shirayuki chooses Science.

She becomes well known. She makes a name for herself. She travels and teaches and is called upon for her knowledge until she reaches the point that no one even thinks about how she was once a poor refugee running from one prince only to be courted by another.

Meanwhile, Hisame succumbs to his injuries after a tragic “”accident””, leaving Kiki free to turn away suitors in her mourning. Claiming grief, she rejects every single last one of them until both the King and her father are so frustrated with her that they accept her proposal that she adopt a distant cousin as an heir, leaving her to rule Seiran as Viscountess upon her father’s retirement/death. 

The day will come, of course, that she must return North to Seiran to learn her position and rule those lands. The lands that Shirayuki must travel through as the King’s diplomat and the Prince’s closest confidant. 

And this is where their romance begins. 

In a world of men and men’s laws, Kiki and Shirayuki each manage to carve out a space for themselves, until the stars align and fate intercedes and they stand before each other once more.

And when they do, they smile, they laugh, and they remember how Kiki said that the day would come that Shirayuki would look upon her not as her friend or as Zen’s aide, but as a completely different thing all together. 

And then Shirayuki will take the hand of her dear and terrified friend who has been nothing but an aching and fond memory for far too long and say: You’re still that beautiful girl in uniform that I couldn’t take my eyes off of all those years ago.

And Kiki, poor Kiki who has had so few chances to show someone her heart since she set on this path, lifts the hand wrapped in hers and kisses it and wonders why it took them so very long to get to this place.

And they move forward, courting each other in that gentle way that they wanted to when they were younger but still too shy or too conflicted and unable to recognize or even act on what they were feeling. 

Until, one night, Kiki, dizzy with all the time that they lost and so desperate to fill the longing chasm left void for years lets loose the words of regret in one long rush of air until Shirayuki gathers her up, kissing her so sweetly, and whispers that time wasn’t wasted at all. Not a single second. A garden needs the right conditions to grow. The right light and the right weather. And here and now, after tilling the soil and planting the seeds and patiently - so very patiently - waiting for their chance, the opportunity has arisen that will allow their love to grow.

And it does. 

And it thrives.

But of course it does.

It was fate that brought them together, after all.

Rare Pair Masterpost

[realityextinct]

Jason!centric fanfic - The Wedge Between (Chapter 1)

CHAPTER 2

Summary:

“I am the enemy I am the antidote Watch me closely I will stand up, now!”

(Arch Enemy - We Will Rise)

Rating: PG-13

Status: In Progress

Chapters: 1/?

Warnings: abstractness/weirdness, lack of proper description..?

A/N: I write with Under The Red Hood Jason in mind, please think of him while reading this story... Arsenal here = The Rise Of Arsenal. That’s all I am going to say (not all of us hate that part of the comics).

I have three chapters already written...so I hope to have this story finished soon enough.

Thank you for reading!!

Word count: 1,298

Chapter 1

The day that marked his, from what he learned, fourth year of death, he decided to return to his grave. It still looked as unattained as he had left it in his hurry and desperation to escape. He still got nightmares to this very day...being buried alive...suffocating... Unable to escape...

Lighting a cigarette, Jason took a seat on the very soil he had to dug through with his bare hands. He could still feel it right now, the dirt and blood, the pain...

The hurt of being forgotten.

And this was the exact reason he was back to this dreadful place. On the day that he died...he wanted to see if there was anyone who would remember him.

If he...would remember him...and come for a visit.

If he did, if anyone from the bat family came, he told himself he would stop acting foolish, he would stop his ridiculous thoughts and childish abandonment issues.

It wasn't hard to blend into society again. He missed a lot in four years, but not enough to cause a lot of problems. This world became more controlling and digitalized. One would think it would help in handling crime, but alas...

He was right all along. The only way to stop crime was through control. Or killing. There was no other way.

Seems like in the years he was gone nothing has changed...if anything, the crime percentage rose.

How very interesting...how very distasteful...

Throwing away the bud, he reached for a second cigarette.

Surely, he still had a long day to go. Might as well make the best of it.

Somehow, the quiet atmosphere of the cemetery calmed him, it brought a sense of peace to his disturbed soul that he was missing...no matter how short-lasting that peace was.

Closing his eyes, Jason imagined a better world, a better place...a place where he was needed, where he belonged.

If only such a place existed.

If only...

Having gone through harsh training, he had enough patience to sit there all day long until the clock struck midnight and the day was over with.

With tens of buds scattered around him, finally, he lowered his head,  momentarily defeated.

He knew no one would come. It was obvious from the fact his grave was still unattained with the hole he dug out still more than obvious.

No matter. It just proved all along he was right.

In a way, this was good, disillusioning therapy.

If only it didn't hurt so much...

Letting out a sigh, he grabbed his mask and pulled it back on, resuming the identity of Red Hood.

Glancing at his gravestone one last time, he smashed it with his foot and without another word made his way out of the cemetery, concluding one very obvious thing.

Indeed, Jason Todd was dead.

Or rather, reincarnated into something else.

Something far better.

This night somehow bore fruit in a way that Jason did not expect, or rather, had little hope for, no matter what his prior conviction was.

Breaking into a prison of any caliber was child's play, especially ones that had his systems installed for the Justice League's use.

The only thing that was strange about this...was finding a hero in this hole.

Standing before his target, Jason was silent, waiting for the man behind the bars to take notice of him.

And eventually, he did, "...a red mask, huh... Can't argue with that color choice."

Roy Harper's slumped body was heavily chained up and he looked like a train wreck, body convulsing from time to time. His tired eyes stared at Jason with resentment and distrust, a combination Todd was familiar with on a personal level.

This further confirmed how right his decision was to come there.

"...so why did you come here, Red Hood?" the fact Roy heard of him made things much easier, "You can't have caused chaos in this prison just to see me~" he snorted amused.

Smart alec, huh, "I have an offer for you, Arsenal," he paused to see Roy frown in concentration, being attentive, "I want you to join me," Jason didn't take his sweet time and cut to the chase.

Roy paused for a moment, then a small laugh erupted from his lips, "Oh..? You do realize the former team I was on just put me behind bars, and for a good reason...what made you take interest?" it's not like he had any desire to team up with anyone at this point, especially not after being betrayed like this.

"That's exactly why I am here," a pause, "Having heard of me, you probably know my identity and reputation...perhaps even, what I after," Jason reached the bars, swiping the previously stolen key card from one of the guards, the bars sliding open, "Don't you think we have something in common, Harper?"

Roy's frown deepened in though as he watched Red Hood step closer, "Just because we apparently share a similar view on what justice really is, doesn't mean we are instant buddies, Todd," having said that, he pondered Jason's words just moments longer.

Roy had to admit that this made sense. His eyes were opened after Lian's death and he had an obvious answer from his former teammates and friends as to where he stood. Having been imprisoned like some dangerous criminal, it was obvious what he was considered at this point... All because he went on a short china white rampage and killed off half a dozen criminals.

They deserved it anyway. As a matter of fact, Roy thought it was unfair he was put behind bars.

He was told to consider his views carefully, that he was starting to venture on a 'wrong', dangerous path.

Roy tried pondering what he did...where he went wrong.

But even as his mind cleared, he still failed to understand why killing criminals, preventing them from hurting others and more people, was wrong.

Justice League...was weak. They could do nothing, just put everyone behind bars. Sadly, he realized it late...but thankfully not too late.

The more villains they let live - the more people would end up dead. Like Lian. It was a simple, logical philosophy, one the goodie-two-shoes' 'justice code' did not allow.

"...besides, don't you fly solo?" Roy continued when he got no answer from Jason, smirking as he did, "...Jaybird?"

Jason's fists clenched at the nickname, but he remained in place with no further reaction, so Roy carried on, "Or is it that I could prove to be a valuable ally?"

"Yes," was Jason's simple reply and he proceeded to undo the chains, acting like he was not at all fazed by Arsenal's words not that anything could be read under his mask, more than certain that at this point in the conversation the answer to his offer was a 'yes', "And for that, I am willing to sacrifice my loner status...Harper."

Roy laughed at that, "...seriously though, how did you find me? I don't think the Justice League goes around sprouting where they keep...ah... 'Defects'."

Jason freed Roy's arm and leg, moving onto his second arm, "I prefer the term 'awoken'..." finally freeing Roy, he watched the man rub his reddened wrists, "The guy you grabbed heroin from was one of my men."

Roy was only mildly surprised, "Ha! Figures...didn't take you for a dealer type or I would have knocked on your window for some..." Roy put on his mask, grabbing his gear just outside the cell, "Lead the way, Jason Todd."

As they left the prison with little to no effort, Jason's suspicion skyrocketed.

He would need to look into this more but for now, he was glad.

Glad to see he wasn't the only one on the path of righteousness.

That someone else shared his 'twisted' point of view and sense of morality.

TBC...

[junker-town]

The inspiring story of TJ Olsen shows the importance of organ donation

Greg Olsen’s son has another chance at life thanks to another.

Greg and Kara Olsen faced the unthinkable this month when they announced their son TJ would require a heart transplant at the age of eight. A boy who had been through so much since his life began in 2012 now faced his most difficult challenge.

This past weekend Olsen posted that a donor had been found for their boy. He was rushed into emergency surgery to perform the transplant, and on Monday a brief video was posted showing TJ in recovery.

Someone has an update pic.twitter.com/L1Zk2AgHpd

— Greg Olsen (@gregolsen88) June 7, 2021

The bravery displayed by a child, and the grace of his parents, is unimaginable. That’s a big, over-used word “unimaginable,” but I cannot think of one that fits better. No scenario exists in which I can fathom being strong if my little girl needed to go through half the medical procedures that TJ did. The idea that something was happening I have no control over is impossible to comprehend. That the little girl who still has the idyllic view that her parents can do anything would have to tell her “there’s nothing we can do.” Even thinking about it now brings me to tears, and that’s not a reality I live in.

There’s a lesson to be learned from TJ: not just in life, but how we confront mortality. Both ours, and others around us. It’s finality none of us want to talk about, pushing it to the recesses of our mind where we stash anything in our life we are too fragile to deal with. Today we look at TJ’s story, but also how we can change our lives to adapt to situations like this in the future.

TJ Olsen’s story

Football was the furthest thing from Greg Olsen’s mind in October 2012. The tight end, had an incredible start to the season coming off his first year in Carolina, but his biggest test was coming off the field.

Kara Olsen was pregnant with twins. The couple learned early in the pregnancy that their son TJ was going to be born with a congenital heart defect known as “Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome,” a grouped term for a number of potential defects in which the heart is unable to pump oxygen-rich blood to the body. A condition which requires surgical intervention, and in extreme cases even transplant.

Panthers fans, and the city of Charlotte rallied around the Olsens after hearing the news. A rookie tradition in Carolina had been having players dress up as super heroes and comic book characters and visiting kids at The Levine Children’s Hospital, but this was the first time one of the team’s own needed the hospital so critically.

The importance of that 2012 season heightened. Olsen was playing not just for the Panthers, but for TJ. The result was one of the most heartening in recent memory, with each week’s score mattering to fans, but not nearly as much as hanging on every update released on TJ’s condition.

Multiple surgeries later, it was announced that TJ would be okay. Instead of being happy his child was out of the woods, and returning to business as usual, Greg and Kara turned their son’s illness into a point of strength. They launched “The HEARTest Yard,” the brainchild of Kara who realized the at-home care TJ required following his surgeries, and the suite of medical needs were utterly unattainable for those who weren’t privileged enough to have an NFL salary in their home.

Partnering with Levine Children’s Hospital, The HEARTest Yard provides funds, support, and specialized treatment plans for everyone, regardless of income. It ensures every child facing similar issues to TJ gets the same level of care, removing the unthinkable barrier for people without the means to pick the best possible care for their children without the crippling financial burden that would come with it.

Since its inception the program has expanded beyond at-home care. Now pivoting into adolescent care, it provides support to children who faced brutal medical issues, and ensures they don’t see lasting effects into adulthood. Typically children who are diagnosed with life-threatening conditions in childhood experience cognitive and learning difficulties beyond their physical diagnosis . The HEARTest Yard follows children beyond being “cleared,” providing cognitive and learning support into adulthood.

It’s unquestionably one of the best charities a former NFL player has been involved in.

Unfortunately, TJ’s struggles continued

On May 24th Greg Olsen announced that despite having years of relative health, TJ was facing another challenge.

This past week has been exceptionally challenging for our family. As many of you know, our son TJ has faced serious heart issues since birth. TJ has already undergone 3 open heart surgeries and has survived with a modified heart for his first 8 years of life. Unfortunately, it seems his heart is reaching its end. We are currently working through the process to determine our next steps, which ultimately could lead to a heart transplant.

We are so thankful for the incredible support we have received over the years. We have received world class care at Levine Children’s Hospital and we are so appreciative of their amazing team. We don’t know how long we will be within these hospital walls. We do know that we are in full control of our attitudes and our outlook.

TJ has been a fighter since birth. We are going to get through this as a family and be better off as a result of this experience.

Thanks for everyone’s prayers.

The Olsen Family

The community that rallied around the Olsens in 2012 was still there. Even though Greg was no longer on the Panthers, the love the community had for his family remained. Area businesses poured out their support, youth games honored TJ, Bank of America Stadium was lit up green for a night in honor of the young boy.

TJ’s favorite color is green so we made sure @BofAstadium was lit up green tonight pic.twitter.com/A325ppRm2n

— Carolina Panthers (@Panthers) June 5, 2021

Dreams soon became reality. A donor was found for TJ. The 8-year-old was given a new lease on life, but with it came a sober reminder that in order for one person to triumph, another was dealing with tragedy. Greg Olsen still doesn’t know where his son’s donor heart came from, a factor of how the anonymity of the process, but asked the world to think of them, wherever they are.

We also want to ask that everyone takes a second to pray for our donor family. Their selflessness during a tragic time gave our boy a chance at life. We don’t know who they are, but we will forever be grateful for everyday we get to have with Tj ❤️ Olsen Family

— Greg Olsen (@gregolsen88) June 4, 2021

TJ Olsen still has a long road ahead while he recovers, but he now has a chance to truly live without the cloud of his illness looming. One story may end here, but it goes far, far beyond that.

The importance of being an organ donor

I never knew my aunt Rochelle very well. She was one of those people who’s called “aunt” by osmosis, a familial relationship so convoluted and complex it’s easier to say aunt than whatever the technical term on a family tree is. I didn’t meet her until I was 10 years old, when she was already sick.

Rochelle was young, too young to need something as complex as a heart and lung transplant — but a routine checkup discovered that at the age of 39 she had congenital issues that required intervention. Rochelle and my uncle Michael moved from Western Australia to Sydney to check in long-term to one of Australia’s best hospitals, where she would have round-the-clock care, and the best chance at getting a transplant.

My school was within walking distance from the hospital. My mom would pick me up, we’d walk over and see Rochelle every day. When I was young I thought we were bothering her. She always seemed so tired, and exhausted to even open her eyes. I later learned that this was the most energy she could muster all day, that the highlight of her hospital room-confined life was seeing her 10-year-old nephew. A brief respite from the crushing reality around her. She’d ask what I did in school, I’ll fill her in on every detail, each joke I made, what I’d learned. Her eyes would light up, and a smile would creep across her face.

Sometimes I’d complain about going to the hospital. The way any kid would after being asked to do something every day. My mom explained how whatever issues I had with it were completely outweighed by the joy I brought Rochelle. I didn’t really get it, but also I did.

I’d be lying if I said I had a good grip on the severity of the situation. All I knew was that Rochelle needed a new heart AND new lungs. On a few occasions a doctor would call my uncle Michael out of room and tell him they’d found a heart, or they’d found lungs — but were waiting to see if another donor emerged to complete the puzzle. Michael would return to the room, equal parts joyful, and self loathing. One the one hand he was excited they got one step closer, then he hated himself for being put in a position where he hoped someone else might die to make the love of his life whole.

This process dragged on for months. Sometimes there was a heart. Maybe there were lungs. Never at the same time, never both when needed. Rochelle continued to deteriorate. Our visits grew shorter. She wasn’t able to smile like she once did.

Then, one day, we stopped visiting. Rochelle’s fight was over.

When my mom asked the doctor he said she was first on the donor list for heart, second for lungs — and hadn’t moved in a month. Less than half the people who died on the east coast of Australia during her battle were registered organ donors. It’s here I learned about the importance of the process.

A 2019 study showed that over 90 percent of Americans support the idea of organ donation, but only 54 percent are registered donors. This could be due to religious beliefs, forgetting to fill out the form when you get your driver’s license, or a product of not wanting to face our own mortality — but we need to be better.

Donating your organs is the single easiest, most altruistic act any person can possibly make. Literally being able to save lives with there being absolutely no price. Yes, obviously you will have died, but donating organs has no bearing on that process. It’s simply giving away things you can no longer use — yet we’re afraid to do it.

I understand the process is scary. It makes death real. It forces us to imagine a world that continues when we don’t exist in it. However, imagine how it must feel to the families of those needing organ donations to imagine living in a world without their loved ones?

You can remedy this almost immediately. Go to OrganDonor.gov, sign up as a donor, and tell your family your decision. That’s all that’s required. Imagine all the time we waste on the internet each day. Here’s 10 minutes that can literally save a life, maybe even more. The final selfless act any person can make to completely alter the lives of people you may never meet, but who your generosity will impact forever.

[evelynmfoye]

Finding The Best Deal On Your Next Automobile

Have you been thinking about buying a Volkswagen in Lynchburg VA but just do not know how to start? Maybe your life is too busy, or perhaps you do not know exactly what you should look for. Don’t waste your money and time searching for cars; instead, use these tips. It can help you figure out whatever it is you need to figure out about Volkswagen shopping.

Do not allow the salesperson to convince you to buy a car that you cannot realistically afford. Frequently, people are talked into purchasing a sports car when the salesperson tells them how good they look in it. Remember, the more expensive the car, the more commission he or she will make.

Look online for a great deal. You have to know the exact Volkswagen in Lynchburg VA you want, or have a short list, before you go to the dealer. Research online to see what brands you want, which are safer and other items dealers will not tell you.

Check into vehicles online before you start working with a dealership. The only time you ought to visit a dealership is when you absolutely know which brand and make you want. Research online to see what brands you want, which are safer and other items dealers will not tell you.

When negotiating, overall price should be more important than monthly price. The dealer can set the monthly payments at any amount, but this will extend your terms, resulting in a very high purchase price. Focus your negotiating on getting the best deal possible on the total price and financing you receive. After, work out a monthly fee you can afford.

When you’re car shopping, be prepared to be at the dealership a while. Don’t go car shopping if you’re pressed for time. Leaving a whole afternoon open is best. If time is an issue, never hesitate to postpone the process and return another time.

Make sure you’re able to be inside the dealership for hours when you’re car shopping. Do not allow feeling rushed to force you into a deal you aren’t comfortable with. You need to let yourself have several hours to decide. You can always come back some other time if you are pressed for time.

Always do a test drive of the car you want before buying it. You may have already driven the same model and make, but you should drive the exact car you plan to buy to ensure its quality. You might find that there are some small things that are not the same or that there is something wrong.

Ask your loved ones what they know. How satisfied are they with their vehicles? Do they regret buying the one they have? Have they heard anything interesting from their friends and family? When you are shopping for a vehicle, this initial information will be useful to you.

Never purchase a car without taking a test drive first. Be sure to test drive any vehicle. It doesn’t matter if it seems perfect. You can’t know without driving it. Nothing can substitute your actual experience with the car. You might just find something you do not like about the car.

If you are the type of person who can’t resist the pressure of buying a Volkswagen, then don’t go shopping by yourself. Have a friend or family member go with you to assist in asking the important questions and negotiating a price. Before going, let them know what you expect to pay and what you are looking for.

Take advantage of online resources for car buyers. You can find any car you can imagine online. While online, learn everything about the car of your choice before visiting a dealer. It is possible to learn about each model’s fuel efficiency, safety ratings, resale values and other relevant factors online.

Don’t drive an expensive Volkswagen in Lynchburg VA to the lot. You might not get a good deal if they see a nice car that they know is expensive.

You may be unable to find the car that is perfect for you. Perhaps, the features you desire are not in your price range, or maybe what you see in the car lots do not appeal to you. You’ll live without heated seats!

Being a Volkswagen dealer means trying to make quotas. Use this fact to your advantage by going to a Volkswagen dealership at the end of the month. Salesmen who have yet to make their expected number of sales will be eager to close another sale. This will let you have more control over price negotiations.

Don’t just scribble down your signature, read the fine print. Before you sign the contract, you should go over it very carefully from beginning to end. When you have put your signature on a contract, you’re, by law, bound to it. You can even ask to take the contract home to look over it some more. If your salesman does not want to let you take the contract home, there is more than likely some hidden clause they do not want you to find out about.

Purchasing a Volkswagen is a lot of fun, but it can also wear you out. Are you aware that you may save time by doing online comparison shopping online? Many websites aggregate pricing and availability information from all over the Internet, which means you don’t have to. You can find detailed information about features, specifications and market values. This helps you narrow down your choices, which can save you both time and money.

If you are extremely interested in a vehicle, spend time thoroughly checking it over. View the paint and look for damage. When it comes to the interior, check for carpet stains or upholstery tears. Know that once you buy this vehicle, it’s your problem. You will be responsible for all chips, rips, scratches and window cracks.

Although you have a mental picture of the car you desire, it might be unattainable. You may not find the Volkswagen of your dreams, or you may not be able to afford a car with all the extras. The absence of heated seats will not detract from your driving experience.

If you have a certain model in mind, call to see if there is one on the dealer’s lot. If you visit a dealer without knowing in advance what you are looking for, a salesperson will try to sell you ANYTHING. Make sure, though, that the car is there for you. Just pick up the phone.

Before purchasing a car from a dealership, ask if you can bring in a mechanic to look over things. The mechanic you use should be trustworthy. The mechanic should be someone that you hand pick personally. The mechanic should tell you whether it can be driven and if it’s a good enough deal for the price.

Do not agree to as-is warranties when it comes to used cars. This can be something that you will regret in the future. At the very least a dealer should offer you a 30-90 day warranty when you purchase any car. It is important to get this in the event of an accident in the months following your purchase.

Dealerships and sales personnel vary greatly. Salespeople are known to be aggressive, but this method doesn’t work as well anymore. Most dealerships realize that by keeping the customer happy, they will have repeat business. If you find yourself with a pushy salesperson, don’t be afraid to walk away. There is always a more pleasant salesman waiting to sell you a Volkswagen in Lynchburg VA.

If you start feeling hassled or intimidated, you should walk away. There is no embarrassment in walking away. If you need to, lie! Make sure that you leave! There are dozens of dealerships nearby, so the hassle isn’t worth it.

Before you buy anything, have a conversation with an insurance agent. They can give you an estimated cost for coverage. Even if this car is affordable now to you, you have to think in the long term as to what the insurance will cost. Select a vehicle that strikes the right note in terms of purchase price and insurance costs.

When choosing a dealership, it’s always good to research the service department. First, you should seek out the opinions of others on the dealership. Call the department and see how they respond to your questions. Select a dealership with smart sales and service staff who are happy to assist.

When deciding which vehicle you should purchase, think of where you normally drive. If you drive a good bit on the interstate, get a Volkswagen in Lynchburg VA with good gas mileage. You do not want to buy a vehicle just for looks, what you intend to use the vehicle for is far more important.

You can now mention a trade-in after you are given an offer that you are happy with. You may not get the best deal for your old car, but you should be flexible as you do have a sales price on the new car you like. You’ve done enough work, now it’s time to buy.

Test Drive

Don’t overdress when you visit the car dealership. If you are wearing expensive clothes and driving a luxury car, you’re going to have a hard time convincing the salesperson you need a great deal on a car.

You should test drive the vehicles you are interested in. Maneuver, test the brakes, drive on the highway and get a general feeling for the vehicle. Make sure you test drive as much as you can so that you won’t experience any problems after the contract has been signed.

You should always do a test drive before you buy anything. This will give you a better feel for the car you are about to buy and alert you of any issues it may have. Test it out in every situation possible so you truly feel confident in your purchase.

When you think you can get a low rate at a bank, why not! You’ll keep your costs down when purchasing a Volkswagen this way. The interest amount through the bank is much lower than with other lenders.

Do not allow yourself to be swindled by your car salesman. Sometimes they seem friendly on the outside, but they just want your trust. Don’t think that they’re being friendly because they are thinking of your best interest. Be skeptical at all times.

Don’t rush into buying a Volkswagen. Dealers are going to always try and create a false sense of urgency that may pressure you to buy sooner rather than later. Do not fall for this. These promotions are a gimmick and usually will last as long as the dealer feels like it.

Do not rush the process of car buying. Dealers are masters at high pressure sales and try to get you out the door with a car. Do not fall for this. There’s a 90% chance that the “special promotion” will remain when you’re ready to buy.

Be open to other kinds of cars. The most well-known names in the industry offer a number of models to meet your needs. When you want a compact Volkswagen in Lynchburg VA, you’ll find that the Civic, Corolla and Focus are all very similar. Compare all the models. The more you know, the more likely you will be to get a good deal!

If a friend or family member has recently purchased a vehicle from a dealer, ask for a recommendation. See what they recommend. Speak to people about specific issues such as customer service afterwards and how their car is about six months from the day they bought it. Go to the dealership that the majority of your friends recommend.

You should now be competent at finding that great deal on a Volkswagen. It’s essential that you find a car that will fit your situation. Use what you’ve learned to secure the best deal.

It’s critical to research when you want to buy a car. Don’t even go to the dealership without doing your homework. Look into the cars that you like, the brands behind them, and even the dealer itself. Having this knowledge will help you be in the know.

Blue widgets is a complex topic, which is why you should take the time to research it some more. This article definitely has the wisdom that you seek. Now implement the advice you’ve just read.

from https://terryvolkswagenshowroom.com/finding-the-best-deal-on-your-next-automobile/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=finding-the-best-deal-on-your-next-automobile

from Terry Volkswagen Showroom - Blog https://terryvolkswagenshowroom.weebly.com/blog/finding-the-best-deal-on-your-next-automobile

[linda-charlie-bloom-blog]

Don't Underestimate The Value Of Failure

As a boy in New Zealand, Edmund Hillary dreamed of becoming a mountain climber and as a young man, he set his sights on Mount Everest, at 29,029 feet, the world’s highest peak, and one that no one had ever successfully summited. His first attempt to conquer Everest in 1951 ended in failure. Defeated, he faced his investors, the London Explorers Club, who had lost all their money.  He stood at the podium in front of a projected picture of Everest and said, "I will defeat you, Everest, because you cannot get any bigger--but I can." Two years later, on his second attempt to defeat Everest, Hillary and his Sherpa guide, Tenzing Norgay, reached the summit of Everest at 11:30 AM on May 29, 1953. The conquest of Everest was announced on the eve of Elizabeth II's coronation, and the new queen knighted Hillary when he returned to Britain.

Edmund Hillary had the imagination to envision an outcome that had previously been viewed as impossible by a large percentage of the world’s population. Equally important, he was consumed by a drive to fulfill his vision that would possess him until he got big enough to accomplish that feat.

Hillary, who as a child was smaller and physically weaker than his peers literally got bigger and grew to be six feet five inches in height by the time that he was out of high school. But it wasn’t his physical growth that enabled him to fulfill his dream, but the growth of his determination and his capacity to embody his commitment.

While all significant achievements require great heart for their fulfillment, most do not require an Everest-sized commitment. They often, however, require a willingness to challenge the outer or inner voices that tell us not to even bother trying, giving us a wide range of reasons and justifications to talk us out of “going for the gold”.

In the realm of relationships, the “gold” is the experience of a committed partnership that provides a haven of love, trust and support in which both partners experience an ongoing ascendance towards increasingly greater fulfillment, self-realization, and contribution.

Many of us possess doubts and fears that such a lofty goal is unattainable. Feelings of unworthiness, inadequacy, shame, or undeservedness can override our deepest desires creating a justification to reduce or even eliminate our vision of what we truly long for in our lives. There are always obstacles between ourselves and the realization of our dreams, most of which seem to be external, yet the biggest obstacles are our internal limiting beliefs and expectations that “protect” us from taking risks that could result in failure and disappointment.

We’ve all heard that relationships require a lot of work, but rarely do we hear much about what the nature of that work actually is. Contrary to popular belief, it ‘s generally less about and your partner working on your relationship together, and more about each of you doing the inner work that you need to do in order to manage your protective, fear-based beliefs that keep you from giving a whole-hearted effort to the fulfillment of the vision of your deepest desires.

Doing so involves the cultivation of qualities such as courage, imagination, intentionality, and perseverance, among other things. Focusing on strengthening of the traits that can promote the development of our character, rather than continuing a preoccupation with the reasons why we are incapable or unqualified to fulfill our dreams can be the most direct path to success.

See if you can think of something in your life that you accomplished that at a former point you believed was out of your reach and impossible for you to ever achieve. Perhaps it was a physical or sports-related feat. Perhaps it was getting a degree or diploma. Or becoming the kind of parent that you really wanted to be but feared that you were unable to be. Or forgiving someone that you believed you could never forgive. Then try to remember how certain you were that there was no way that you could ever do this, but somehow, you did.

Even when we’re positive of our inability to succeed at something, we can be wrong. The intensity of our efforts is directly linked to the degree to which we are willing to be honest we are with ourselves in regard to how important the fulfillment of our desire is to us.

Another component in this process is support. Frequently, our belief that we can’t accomplish something doesn’t take into account the support factor. Hillary made it to the top but he didn’t do it alone. He had an enormous amount of support that was an essential ingredient in his success. He attracted this support to his project by affirming his confidence and his vision with such clarity, that it became almost irresistible to the many members of his team.

There are some things that are more painful than failing. One of them is to fail to make the effort that we need to make in order to find out whether it is possible for us to succeed. In her ground-breaking book, The Five Top Regrets of the Dying, Bronnie Ware who spent a great many hours caring for people in the final stages of their lives reveals that the regrets of most of those with whom she spoke with had to do with things that that didn’t do, chances that they didn’t take, opportunities that they didn’t accept, rather than things that they had done that they wished they hadn’t.

Each time that we challenge the internal voice or the external voices that try to discourage us from owning and affirming the legitimacy of our dreams, and step towards them rather than invalidate them, we grow in courage, resourcefulness, and self-respect, whether we succeed or fail. Another term for failure is “ learning experience”, and as every successful person will tell you, we need to have them in order to succeed. Fortunately, there are usually plenty of opportunities to learn on the way to the summit.

[fireandeye-blog]

There May be Darkness, But Oh There is Light

I stand now in the presence of the shadows of my past. I’m not sure where standing firm in my own authenticity may lead, yet I’m am ok with that. I’m ok with seeing love in the darkest aspects of myself. I have encountered myself in many forms, through many faces. I have viewed my true self buried among images of the old. Do I let these shadows define me? Or do I continue to focus on my light instead. Do I have faith in the hope I have seen reflected in the face of another? Do I choose to see another, the way in which I hope for myself to be seen?

I often question how long we as humans have seen ourselves as separate from love on Earth. Have our souls become so fractured, personalities so dissociated, that we have adopted the belief that Divine Love can only appear to us in some distant place or time? Why, and how did we become disconnected in this way? We have truly been wandering the Earth over countless lifetimes, searching for ourselves. Searching for the self, somewhere out there.

Then as soon as we think we have gotten a small glimpse of what it is we are searching for, it becomes quite frightening. At this point we have had years of conditioning to believe that harmony between man and woman is unattainable in the Earthly realm (the realm of separation and sin right?) When we do fall in love, we soon find what seems to be an enormous lack of intimacy between ourselves and the person we fell in love with. The person we once thought to be perfect match, becomes the person we wish we could figure out how to love again. We find ourselves standing in the same room with a partner, yet feeling miles and miles away from home. We find ourselves questioning, how did we find ourselves exiled from Eden so soon?

Unfortunately, many times when we recognize this distance between ourselves and our loved one, we run. Instead of rebuilding our heaven on Earth, we immediately start searching for a new heaven. Yet what we fail to realize is that this distance is the very thing which love needs in order to mature. Our exile is what teaches us appreciation, acceptance, and courage. Our journey through the desert teaches us to recognize our true source of water. That distance ultimately reveals to us the power of love to be real.

Sometimes we find ourselves in a state of emptiness. A state of need. So we may go out (or better yet, go within) searching for something to fill that space. But what we are always looking for is the self. When we look up, we recognize ourselves instantly upon seeing our own reflection. Yet hunger, fear, and emptiness cause us to fall into our animal nature. We devour a new lover upon reaching them, much like a starving soul upon receiving its first meal. I have been there. I have done that. Many, many, times.

However, by loving without need, I am able to hold what is dear gently in my heart.

My stories have been blissful, ecstatic.

My stories have been painful, tragic.

But all true love stories must encompass a beginning and an end. Love only emerges when endings are recognized merely to be new beginnings in disguise. This is the nature of love; the nature of life itself. These truths can be experienced and discovered along the mystical path.

Though one hard lesson I have learned is that just because I have seen God in someone, it does not make that person God. Everything and everything is encompassed in the vastness which we call God. All is one in the Universe and we ourselves must choose how to dance along with it.

When we come together energetically with another human being, we are able to share our experience of God with that person. The union of the feminine and masculine principles in our world are indeed the creative forces that form God Consciousness. The way these principles interact in our realities and within our own bodies create our experience of God.

Often we find love and intimate connection with those who share similar perceptions. We are drawn to those who seem to understand us on a deeper level. I think that because as a society our religious freedoms have been severely opressed and manipulated, people often find it difficult to connect with others spiritually outside of organized religion. A balanced spiritual understanding in the aspect of love and marriage in our society seems to have been lost completely.

Traditionally, religion often attempts to define and regulate love and marriage. Unfortunately, most religious systems have given people a purchase and property ownership model and passed it off as a Godly structure for union of partners. This has created a widely accepted practice of transactional love in place of true Divine Love and spiritual partnership. Transactional love is more like a business transaction. You give me something and I’ll give you something in return. I didn’t like what you gave me, so you owe me something more. You didn’t give me what I wanted, so I will find it somewhere else. Even though you are unhappy and unfulfilled, you are bound to me due to our joint ownership of each other and our children.

Through spiritual partnership however, we are allowed time to stand back and observe ourselves and our relationship from a higher perspective. We allow ourselves time to learn and grow with others while allowing ourselves time to work through our own emotional baggage. Spiritual partnerships allow us to observe how our emotions and subconscious patterns manifest into our reality energetically, even when we may not intend to act on them.

Our sexual energy is a powerful force. It is the force of creation. All life is created through a spark from the mingling of these masculine and feminine energies within us. Through sexual exchange we allow ourselves to share our perception of creation, our heaven or hell, with another person. This is how we come to know ourselves, as well as the other. As our creative forces are released into the world, we begin to see the results manifest in the external world. We can see these results manifest physically as a child, or we can also observe them in the reality we create around us. The reality we create for ourselves through sexual energy allows us to observe our subconscious beliefs about love and sex. We can observe how we have been programmed to love or what we have mistakenly believed to be love. What I believe is most important to remember, is that when we co-create through sexual energy with another person, we are always co-creating with some aspect of the self. Only when we are loving with ourselves can we truly be loving to the other.

Consider a situation in which the person you love is expressing anger towards other people or situations that you are unaware of. It is easy to mistake that anger to be about you. The person you love could be stressed out about a million other things, yet it is fairly easy to take that frustration personally. Now consider that the person you are in love with absolutely swept you off of your feet in the beginning. This person makes you feel simple appreciation for his or her mere existence in your experience of reality. This love has lifted the weight of the world from your shoulders. But what if your love has not quite done the same for them? What if the weight that person is carrying is just a bit heavier than yours? Perhaps they just need more time to unravel a few things, to lay it all down in the presence of love. Perhaps they have learned to build thicker barriers than you have. It may be hard for you to understand your partner’s anger, distance, or lack of intimacy. You may expect them to feel as free as you do, and when they don’t, you may take it personal. You may think that everything your partner is feeling or doing, has something to do with you.

Do you then begin to define yourself through the eyes of your partner? Do you begin to feel as if you were constantly doing something wrong to upset them? Then, the more you try to make amends, to love better, to love more, the more you are pushed away and met with anger or rigidity? In the long run, it is best realized that anger with others, is only anger with self. It is a sense of powerlessness creeping in. A feeling of loss of control over one’s own environment or circumstances. It could be caused by lack of control over another person who is giving us a hard time. Yet the very thing we are unable to control in another, is what we are most likely unable to control in ourselves.

There have many times in my life that I have believed myself to be under the control of another person. I have felt myself energetically gripped, in full submission to the thoughts, perceptions, and direction of other people. Especially men who I have fallen in love with. I took myself as their prisoner, because this is what I was taught to do. This is what religion and society taught me was right. This is what transgenerational trauma conditioned me to accept. I have seen myself take a man as a teacher, guru, and then a god.

Yet I have followed my God experience. I have walked without waiver, only to discover that my perception of Divine Love had been greatly distorted and damaged. When my God told me that I was bad, I believed him. When my God told me that I was no longer worthy, I believed him. When my God told me that I was not loving, I tried to love harder, to love more. Whatever he requested, I attempted to deliver.

My God soon became angry, my God soon began rejecting my sacrifices and many offerings. What now could I give? I had given all that I had. I had renounced all financial support and materialistic belongings. I set out following, what I felt to be love. I followed the wisdom of my ancestors, the signs, the synchronicities. The symbols that entered my subconscious and expressed themselves through art. I surrendered to the mystery which was hidden within the self.

I have to stop looking back in attempt to answer the questions as to when, where, and how I went wrong. I only see myself here and now in this moment. I find myself free of all the pain and suffering that I once endured. I find that the power of love and forgiveness has given me new life. I find that I do not believe myself to have gone wrong.

It is only natural that we as humans identify our chosen partner with God’s love. Marriages have traditionally been believed to be appointed by, or at least approved by God. Our deepest desire is to find a love on Earth that gives us a glimpse of the divine, a love that does not expire in a short while. As we get older and have experienced the thrills and pitfalls of young love, we start seeking someone who allows us to see God in them. We look for something magical. Something to give us reason to believe that God is real. Something to give us reason to believe that love is real.

I know now that it is not the human form that falls in love. It is more like one ocean of consciousness meeting itself in another. It has always been myself that I love most, and my partner simply grows to become my favorite mirror. Does this mean that the reflection is always pretty? Well, how well are you loving yourself? In most cases today, that reflection does not turn out to be pretty at all, especially after the infatuation stage has faded away. At first, because of your hunger for love, you will see that other person in all the ways you desire them to be, just so that you can take part in that  joy of appreciation. Then later, everything that has been buried comes to the surface. Who you once saw as an angel, soon becomes the devil. Will you be able to face your demons and come into balance with the darkness that is yours alone?

The mirror you love most will not be perfect, as you are not perfect. It will often at some point in time, show you every single thing that you don’t want to see. But when you truly love, you find that this mirror shows you what you need to see in order to grow, to heal, to live more fully. It forces you to find the courage it takes to fight for what is true in a world full of lies. It forces you to let go and live. This type of love is sabotaged by the fear of losing it. Yet I know now that love is not something that can be lost as long as it is not captured, or held to tightly.

I believe that the higher standard of love that I wish to bestow onto future generations is not a fantasy. I believe that we all have the right to choose to live life as a pilgrimage, instead of a race. To enjoy a long journey home instead of a quick trip to nowhere. This is our birthright. Unfortunately, false representation of abundance has created spiritual poverty and homeless souls in this world. We believe it is money we lack, but in reality, it has been love.

The world may go on running, chasing, and hunting down things to buy, people to own, and cars to drive. However, I’ve come to understand that I don’t have to go on doing the same. I’ve also come to understand that it’s alright to let other people go on doing what they want to do. And as for me, It’s alright to live life as a pilgrimage. There are so many people who get away with terrible things in the world. Are we so blind to believe that we can’t also “get away” with love? We have only created these types of false limitations in the mind.  

Think of all the times in your life that you have strayed far from home, only to return once again. Have you been out wandering again for a while now? Would you approach the door of your own heart with a bit more reverence this time? Is it time to rest in the understanding that home has never been lost, and may always be found once more?

I know that personally, I have spent most of my life allowing the energies of others to define who I was. I had fallen into a pattern of allowing negative feedback dictate who I am allowed to become. Yet I know now, that I am not required to be anything other than who I choose to be. I am not required to be who I was 6 years ago, yesterday, or even five minutes ago.

I have learned that it’s okay to love myself.

It’s okay to take time to examine and to illuminate my shadows.

And it’s alright, to love my favorite mirror.

“I know you’re tired, but come. This is the way.” -Rumi