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#about how people love characters until they're women or something
stupot · 1 year
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I feel like, regrettably, this website needs a crash course in recognizing a particular brand of post about female martyrdom and suffering that is really, at its core, based on OP's views on a holistic level, a post about hating """men""" in disguise. Female anger is righteous and does come a from a place of personal and historical suffering, and should be expressed. I truly do think that. But I guess Tumblr's userbase sucks because then you go on these blogs and it's post after post about how men are ontologically evil and sex work should be criminalized and women are these broken shattered creatures unilaterally scorned by MALES with no hope for justice. Just the absolute most childish reductive way of analyzing misogyny in our culture that always boils down to racism, prejudice against sex workers, and transphobia
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astrophileblogs07 · 2 months
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ASTRO OBSERVATIONS PT.20
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⚫ Opposite to the stereotype of Leo being a narcissist, its the Aquarians who are more narcissist than ANY other zodiac. Esp its the Dhanishta naks out of the Aqua naks who are so.
⚫ I have seen 3 Aquarian moons (of Dhanishta nak) who had a poverty stricken first half of life (childhood, teenage years) but then they become well off like rlly very well off in their second half (esp after marriage). They marry rich 🤑 too. What i am saying here is the dramatic transformation of their financial life.
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⚫ Pisces men are physically abusive. That's it. Esp the March Pisces. They literally are a bully. (Dont be fooled by the beautiful doe eyes lol)
⚫ "WOW What voluminous and luscious hair he's got!" -my ♌ rising and moon mom commenting on a side character with insignificant role in a movie 🤣. I wasn't noticing that at all...but she seemed to be stuck on that feature 😂.
⚫ Martian influence on a chart can actually have a liking to dangerous weapons and ammunitions. (Like idk I weirdly love them 😂😂)
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⚫ Females with Ketu ruled naks are the first group of people whom male perceive as "threat". (Second is mars btw). Like if the other person is a typical male (egoistic, chauvinist) they will literally hate you to the core coz they know you equal them in all ways (except you know what LMAO 🤣). So they'll try to pin you down or belittle you etc. (sad, but since I have experienced I wanted it to share w you guys)
⚫ Also I love the way Ketu Nak women get along becoz mostly they have so much in common. And by that I mean how the society (male dom) treats them. I am not saying they're an "outcast" but the reaction they face just coz the male species get intimidated by us which has an cascading effect on our mental peace is beyond tolerance.
⚫Ketu naks are sexyyyyyy 🖤👁️🫦👁️❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥
(I always imagine a smokin hot biker girl 👩🏻‍🎤with leather jacket and smoky eyeshadow whenever I hear "Ashwini, Magha and Mula")
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⚫ I have seen a Chart which was totally "Mars" chart and I'll tell you, that person has Aries asc, Moon, Mars and (Mercury ig is in Scorpio?idr) along with Scorpio sun. And that person is like personified version of the planet itself. So cunning and so shrewd, potentially be a mastermind. Statergic. Secretive af. (Might be their middle name to exaggerate). Close to their mom. Loves friends (friends over anything). Also they have a "reddish" tint to their skin (no health probs, but yeah that planet does that). Knows how to tackle any embarrassing moment in public and deal with it. (I am jealous of him coz i wanted to be like him in every way 😂)
⚫Lilith and Pluto aspects in natal chart can actually survive 8H synastry. Almost same energy and themes. 💀
⚫Why are Maghas the "scapegoat" of the family? Like they be framed in a situation with which they have no relation with. Its annoying to see. Its like you're locked in your room chilling and as soon as you step out, everyone in the family is blaming you for something or the other. Now you're the "bad guy". (Yo wtf 🤡). Added to the generosity of Leos, people target you often. 😕
⚫Libra men CANNOT stand loneliness and being ostracized at all in any way. I have seen this in every Libra I came across. For eg: if you're the "black sheep" they won't talk to you and will go with what the crowd says. And if people have outcasted them just becoz they're with you/involved with you, they'll drop you like hot potato. People say and stereotype Capricorns for being the one who cares about reputation and all, but her 'Venus-ruled-Saturn-exalted' sister also is same. 💀
(no wonder they're besties lol)
P.S: I read a post here which said "Eye contact with 8H synastry hits different" ( i am not copying, i don't remember the username) and boy is that true 💀💀💀. Like I was -->😯😳🫣. Coz I have experienced that 🤣🤣. It does, than any other eye contact I have seen. Lmao 🤣🤣.{Edit: its @zeldasnotes 🖤😁}
Hope you liked it 😁😊. Until next time! 👋🏻
Love you y'all ❤️❤️❤️
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grandtyphoonpoetry · 5 months
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I know it's been said before, but I feel like Katniss gets compared to Lucy Gray a lot because they're both victors from 12 and both women, but its actually Sejanus that she's really similar to. Side note- forgive me if i get a few things wrong, I just saw the new movie and re-watched all the old ones but I haven't read the books in a while.
We see Sejanus thrust into a world he doesn't feel like he belongs to, and we can assume he wasn't a revolutionary until he was directly faced with the horrors of the capital where he became one of the only people willing to speak up. On the other hand, years later, we see Katniss willing to do her own thing and not be involved until the games directly involve her and suddenly she's fighting like hell against the capital specifically, not the other tributes.
The funny thing about them is that the only thing they have going for them, or their cause, is their passion. Neither of them are charismatic, neither of them are particularly likeable or make good impressions. They're brusque, disconnected, determined and absolutely unwilling to play a part, no matter how it may alter the outcome. How other people view them matters very little and they operate on a one track mind. Sejanus made a statement to the game makers and honored a friend when he broke into the arena for Marcus, filled with grief and only half thinking. Katniss did the same when she covered Rue with flowers and when she hanged the dummy of Seneca Crane. Both are calculated but are shortsighted when it comes to their actions. They're sensitive and caring but it's not an immediately obvious character trait, and not something that they're generally known for.
They both just wanted there to be peace, they wanted there to be change, but they didn't want to be the ones to have to do it, unable to handle that kind of weight on their shoulders, and unable to put on an act. Katniss was ready to run from the fight as long as she had the people she loved with her and they were taken care of. Towards the end, all she wanted was for her and Peeta and her family to be safe and away from the fighting. Sejanus tried to help a group of people run away, and tried to run with them, and away from the mess Panem was becoming. He didn't want to be in the middle of it anymore, and as long as he could help a few less fortunate than himself and be away, he was okay. Both of them have break downs on several occasions when their quick actions of what they thought was kindness have consequences they NEVER wanted for anybody (after Katniss speaks in 11 or when Sejanus accidentally gets the rebels in 12 weapons).
Snow was definitely triggered by Katniss because she sang Lucy Gray's song. But he was probably fascinated and enraged by her at the start when she, and her lover boy(artist, performer, lover of people, Lucy Gray) START the games unconventionally -together- and Katniss is passionate, and she's calculated and at the same time so so so impulsive and myopic, and she reminds him of someone. Somebody he betrayed a lifetime ago but that betrayal was his tipping point of NEVER coming back to ANY good he had left in him. And she cries for tributes she knew for a day, and she can't act, even if her life depended on it (and it does), and she lashes out without forethought creating another mess Snow has to clean up, and he can't get a handle of her, and she's a disaster, and all he can think is Sejanus, Sejanus, Sejanus while he tries to control her more and everything spins out farther than he could've imagined.
Sejanus trusted Snow, and Snow outsmarted him, and in the end it was Sejanus's traits he went up against, and he underestimated her and he lost everything for it.
Me and @diamondsunbursts-and-marblehalls have been breaking down all the characters and their connections so thank you to them for helping me flesh this out.
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trexiejan · 1 month
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Some Toxic Dickbabs moments that happened in canon. (LONG POST)
so i saw a dickbabs shipper talking crap about dickkory saying they're the most toxic nightwing ship? and they also claim dickbabs is the most healthiest ? it's ironic considering I've seen many dickbabs comic panels where dickbabs is being toxic towards each other plenty of times in the canon comics. Looks like Tom Taylor wants to brainwash people and make them believe that Dickbabs is such a perfect healthy loving couple since day 1, when that hasn't been true at all before he was put in charge of the nightwing comics to write dickbabs wattpad fanfiction in the book every single issue, this ship has done nothing but damage both characters even in tom taylor's run Dick is turned into a happy go lucky himbo who is incapable of accomplishing anything on his own without being monitored and babysat by barbara 24/7.
Anyways let's proceed with dickbabs history of being a toxic couple.
Remember those times where Barbara physically and verbally assaulted him when he was only trying to be nice and polite. She yelled at him, called him stupid, a crybaby and beat him up.
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Also they keep calling Kory a victim blamer for something that happened once in over 30 years ago but ignore the fact that Babs has victim blamed him and slutshamed him multiple times in the modern comics when he was sexually assaulted and raped by Tarantula and when he got shot in the head by the Joker.
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Dick just got raped by Tarantula and was traumatized by what happened but instead of comforting Dick, she has the nerve to mockingly say Dick likes his rapist. her jealousy always clouds her judgement.
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I'm sorry But Barbara is canonically a victim blamer and a slutshamer. Don't forget how she also insults and slutshames other women like Helena when she gets jealous of the other women in Dick's life. She called dickhelena a cheap one nightstand even though Dick clearly told Helena he doesn't do casual sex and and she mocked Kory and refused to help her on a mission when her people were dying.
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so yeah let's get back to her history with victim blaming Dick. She victim blamed him again after he got shot in the head and had an amnesia and when his memories was restored, she lashed out at him for forgetting about her when he had an amnesia.
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And remember that time when Bludhaven was burned down and Dick lost his apartment, he came to Barbara to ask if he can stay at her place but she kicked him out of her apartment the next day. She's totally fine with him being homeless but dickbabs shippers claim babs has always been very loving and supportive towards him while calling Kory a slut.
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Even in elseworld stuff she treats him like garbage. Aside from cheating on Dick with Batman and getting pregnant with Batman's baby in the BTAS universe, she's also very emotionally abusive to him in comics where dickbabs shippers brag about them having a kid in it like in whiteknight.
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Barbara was always out there acting like a toxic judgemental domineering bitch in the modern canon comics, Barbara behaved like this consistently for more than 30 years but Kory is the one we should crucify over something that she did only once from 30 years ago 🙄 Did they crucify Barbara too when she was ableist to Cass and called her stupid because she can't read.
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And they call Kory a sexual assaulter? Because she kissed him when they first met. Did they forgot that Kory was an alien, she was clueless about Earth laws when she first came to earth, she didn't know that you're actually not supposed to kiss someone without their consent, she had no clue that it was considered inappropriate and she kissed him not to sexually assault him but for her to learn english. Her people can learn other languages through kissing and Kory didn't learn anything about Human law until she officially joined the teen titans, so you can actually excuse her for her behavior what's not excusable is Barbara who was a human being who studied law for years, but still has the nerve to commit a sexual crime. As always, She violated Dick's personal privacy, she put camera on his apartment so she can enjoy watching him naked without his consent. Look it up on google the crime is called voyeurism. Barbara would considered a creepy criminal by human law. I'm not surprised considering I always think of her as a type of gf who has no respect for her partner's personal space especially when she's Oracle, She never respected Dick's privacy even in tom taylor's run, she keeps monitoring his every move in her computer, she always invades his personal space. Dick is trapped in this relationship. It's not a good relationship if you constantly watch your partner's every move and if you keep following your partner around like a dog wherever he goes.
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Many people think Dickbabs is such a healthy because of Tom Taylor's run. I think for someone who is a huge dickbabs shipper like tom taylor it's expected he's gonna try to convince people to believe that to to sell his favorite ship but in reality even in Tom Taylor's run Dickbabs relationship is pretty toxic and forced. It's toxic when your partner doesn't respect your privacy, when your partner constantly stalks and keeps an eye on you on every single thing that you do, when you wanna talk to other people but she's there lurking in her computer listening to your conversations with other people, when she puts a camera on your mask so she can always see what you see and hear what you hear, as if you're not a real human being who needs your own privacy, and constantly follows you around like a dog, like Barbara does to him every single issue. It really is a sign of an abusive relationship when there is no respect. How is Tom Taylor's Nightwing good when the book keeps destroying Dick's independece by having Barbara stuck to him like a leech 24/7 . The book is called Nightwing but Tom Taylor turned it into a Nightwing and Batgirl fanfiction series where 90% of the time Dick hasn't done anything on his own and where his IQ is chopped off in half to prop up Barbara as the smarter woman in their relationship. Dick can't even handle his own missions without constantly being babysat by Barbara in her computer like a sidekick who needs to be watched 24/7.
Poor Dick he became Nightwing to stop being Batman's sidekick and be independent only for Barbara to take away his independence and treat him like a sidekick again. Dickbabs has always been a toxic ship in any kind of form.
and don't forget Tom Taylor himself is a toxic misogynist slutshamer. He keeps throwing shade on Kory on twitter by liking comments that slutshame her on twitter
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You know what would be the best way to fix dickbabs? is by letting them move on from each other! Let them grow tf up and move forward in life outside this relationship.
Babs is an anchor that brings him down whenever she's too involved in his life and same with Babs because do dickbabs shippers even care about Barbara. I haven't seen any barbara fan complain about barbara not doing anything on her own other than chasing dick around like a dog in his comicbook every single issue.
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Hii babe!!
I just read both of your Connor fic/hc’s and I love them! I was wondering if you could do something with Connor and a daughter of Aphrodite reader? Maybe headcannons of how he would be on a quest (pre-dating or dating I don’t mind), or potentially something about sneaking out of camp with him (again pre-dating/dating)? If you have another idea go ahead I just don’t find many people who write for Connor so I figured I’d request
Thanks so much!!! 🩷🩷
⋆⭒˚.⋆ connor stoll x daughter of aphrodite! reader hcs
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content: connor stoll x daughter of aphrodite! reader warning: allusions to authoring need sex (sorry, I was foaming at the mouth that’s my bad), language for sure, author's note: i be doing so many daughter of aphrodite x characters that this one took so long simply bc my pinterest was struggling to pinterest and find me cute pink pics.
just a girl and her ironic shirt loving boyfriend
i just know his closet (chest?? idk where they store their clothes in those cabins someone call up good sir rick and ask bc this is gonna live rent free in my head until i figure it out) is full of those shirts.
'women want me. fish fear me.'
'im not as think as you drunk i am.'
bro loves them, laughs every time he puts it on and looks in the mirror
and so, to prove your love to him, you took a risk with your fashion
while you were kinda known for your excellent fashion taste, your boy was so worth putting it at risk to see the huge smile stretch across his lips
'i heart to make boys cry' proudly stretched across your chest
he's drooling
he's sobbing
he's completely in love
and he's buying a matching one, expeditiously
connor loves to pull tiny pranks on you, nothing too big or serious bc you WILL cry
hiding your lip gloss, replacing the makeup in your makeup with confetti that blows up in your face when you open it, those candles that don't blow out on your birthday
OH OH OH and he loves to that thing where like he says, 'you've got something on your shirt' and when you look down he like flicks your face back up
well, if you were travis he'd flick your face back up
but since youre you, he holds your chin in his hand and lifts your face back up and plants a big kiss on your lips
he laughs every time, thinks hes funny or some shit
he is funny but don't tell him that
also he will always steal for you. like, always
"oh that shirt is so cute."
"okay okay, so cover my back from the security camera over there and i'll shove it into my pants-"
"connie, baby, i'm just going to buy it. like a normal person."
"...why?"
calls you 'love bug'
just his little love bug, his sweet lover girl, his dove
if he sees something that comes in pink and blue, he's buying it
and proudly showing it to you, claiming its you guys in another universe
"this is use if we were converses- OH, and this is us if we were toothbrushes. this is us if we were cars- look, they're kissing, isn't that cute??"
he's on the verge of tears telling you this
every pink sunset, he sends you a pic, telling you that it reminded him of you
also, NEEDS a 'im home' text or will think you died
after a hang out, you're just chilling at home until connor comes running into your house, pulling you into a tight hug as you look at him confused
"con, what's going on?"
"you didn't tell me you got home and i thought you died."
"...and you didn't think to call??"
"...no."
unprompted, you bought a necklace with a dainty little 'c' on it and you just wore it one day without giving him warning or anything
he sees it and he's just all smiles, reaching a finger out and pulling it away from your skin gently
"what's this for then?"
"oh, the 'c' stands for chocolate, you know i love my chocolate-"
"shut up," he hums, not even giving you time to reply as he presses his lips against yours
he gets a matching one
and it looks great during sex, your initial dangling over your head as his slips around on your chest
god that's so hot-
i need my matchy-matchy boyfriend
i need my soft boy
i need sex-
jk jk jk
...kinda
oh and if you think this boy isn't sneaking in and out and all about camp for you, you're sooooo wrong
he sneaks things in, sure, but that's easy
what's more of a challenge is when he promised you a date outside of camp
but even that's relatively easy
you guys just climb into the back of the delivery truck, hiding among the strawberries until one of his siblings slaps the side of the truck, telling them they're good to go
before you guys started dating, it was kinda awkward as there really wasn't much space back there, both of you trying to shuffle away and give the other as much space as possible
but now...you're on his lap the whole ride
trust, those strawberries have SEEN some things
hope they find peace fr
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azulasmommyissues · 1 month
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ATLA sexuality headcanons, part 1, Aang's era:
aang
-unlabelled or pansexual, also incredibly gnc. he/they methinks
-he never questioned it, he never thought about it. the air nomads were chill with everything, so he was too.
-he simply loves people, and he loves them deeply. he's the sort of person who says "i love you" very fast. and he doesn't have a specific type, either. he simply connects with people.
-he definitely had a bit of a thing for kuzon back in the day. kuzon taught him all the fire nation dances he knows, and bumi cheered them on.
-he also kinda digged teo, the mechanist's son, but by that point he already had his heart set on katara.
-as for girls, he DID like on-ji. in different circumstances, they would might have dated for a short while. but with katara it was love at first sight. the sort that makes you giddy and stupid.
-he's a lot worse at rizzing up katara because he is just THAT into her and he keeps fumbling
katara
-growing up, she never really questioned it. she knew she definitely liked boys and never had feelings for another girl.
-she's certainly fully cisgender. happily says “she/her/hers” when asked for her pronouns
-on the contrary, she was somewhat attracted to haru and jet both—and might've even considered zuko in different circumstances. like she definitely felt something akin to attraction in the crossroads of destiny.
-she fell in love with aang, because he gave her hope, he gave her joy, he gave her balance. she already felt SOMETHING in the cave of two lovers, but she was deeply confused and her feelings didn't clear until after the war.
-she always thought of herself as straight but said that, if she had the chance, she would be willing to kiss a girl—as an experiment. she just sort of always admired pretty girls, in the sense of "do i wanna BE her or DATE her,"
-and she's really passionate about feminism, obviously
-she always prefers getting compliments from other women because "they're worth mOre"
-eventually she meets jiang who's such a butch lesbian and questions EVERYTHING
-is that a girl? is that a boy? idk but why are they kinda...
-niyok and nutha both give homoerotic friendship vibes with her (all comic specific characters have the combined personality of one person hence why I'm including both)
-since she was dating aang she didn't explore her sexuality, but she discussed it with him and he supported her
-she considered identifying as bi but didn't feel like she qualified, since she'd never actually dated a girl. aang told her it's okay eifher way.
-at the end she decides to keep it all behind closed doors as per water tribe tradition. she's happy with aang, some girls are hot, it's nobody's business but her own.
-i also completely fw the reading of her as a straight cis girl, but you know
sokka
-bisexual, female lean, and maybe even poly.
-he fell for yue, he fell for suki. he definitely found like, ty lee attractive, but he didn't LIKE her. He was involved with suki, and they hadn't had any conversation about the exact status of their relationship so he wasn't about to fumble it.
-suki and him are both bi. and if yue were alive they'd BOTH be dating her. at the same time.
-zuko was sokka's bi awakening. seeing zuko and suki run around in the boiling rock absolutely changed his brain chemistry.
-he had a hard time accepting it, because of how the water tribes roll. he had a preconceived notion of manhood that he obviously had to challenge alongside his initial sexism.
-but then he realised that 1) his dad had been in a secret poly relationship with kya and bato, and then with bato and malina-- 2) his grandma had a fling with hama--3) master piandao and jeong jeongwere a thing--and 4) his girlfriend herself, suki, was bi. so bro had nothing to worry about.
-his identity became clear to him with suki's and his father's help. unlike katara, he was a bit more open and public with it. being poly, him and suki had many opportunities to explore it, always respecting each other's boundaries.
-sometimes suki does his makeup and he grows to enjoy it. he experiments with gender expression until he becomes totally chill with it.
-big part of his character is learning that he doesn't have to be a “man” in the way that patriarchy imposed on him his whole life
-so like, cisn't
toph
-toph has crushes on boys: sokka, zuko, the duke, satoru, sun, kanto. but i think non of them are really legit.
-toph would also flirt with girls, like, yaling
-had a 'not like other girls' phase
-she/they/he vibes, has a very complicated relationship with gender
-because she was made fun off by other girls as a child, it was harder for her to blend in and talk with them
-she was also raised sheltered within the walls of aristocracy which contributed to her not thinking about it
-she avoided commitment and serious relationships like the plague
-so she's unlabelled and perhaps in the aro spectrum. like, demisexual. but being both demi (aka needing to like someone as a person and getting to know them before feeling attracted to them) AND having commitment issues and a bunch of failed relationships is like, a DEADLY combo.
-i don't know. she is chaotic and not at all skilled with romance so she always fumbles it.
-but i also think she might just be 1000% aromantic whether or not she understands it fully
-i think that's very plausible
suki
-bisexual with a female lean and maybe poly
-big she/they vibes
-she's got endless autistic rizz like girl seduced sokka at light speed.
-in kyoshi island they called the bisexuals 'children of kyoshi' and the lesbians 'children of rangi'
-kyoshi island is basically lesbos if you didn't know /hj
-had her first kiss with mingxia before they decided that "ew, never again, i see you like a sister". she was super happy to meet meilin, mingxia's girlfriend
-DEFINITELY liked biyu and they might have been a thing in different circumstances. Aka if biyu hadn't betrayed her.
-would've dated both sokka and yue if yue was alive. like she would have loved yue. both of them having never left their respective homelands. both of them caring about community and having a duty to their people, a leadership position,,,
-but suki being so badass, liberated, free—and yue needing to sacrifice herself to BE free from her oppressive environment,,, like yue would also admire suki so much?? they would love exploring the world together and it'd put sokka out of a very awkward spot-
zuko
-demiromantic, bisexual. like this boy is SOMEWHERE im the ace spectrum but he's also bi. I'd say with a male lean.
-had internalised homophobia growing up, because, duh, fire nation
-he definitely thought that everyone feels like that when he was a child until his mother told him that this was very much NOT the case
-the gaang made him realise that it's totally okay and since they are all so queer he felt very safe with them
-made gay marriage legal in the fire nation
-made pride a thing in the fire nation inspired by the rainbow fire because i said so
-definitely felt attracted to both jet and sokka in the guy department.
-now, when it cames to girls, mai was his childhood crush.
-he definitely found song attractive but he was NOT in that headspace obviously
-same thing with jin although he was in a better headspace then. he introduced jin and song to each other post-war and they dated each other.
yue
-never got the chance to figure out how much girlypop liked women
-i could so easily claim she's a femme lesbian and that sokka was comphet, and I could even CONVINCE ya'll, because he is SO comphet coded, but I really love yue's storyline as it is and the lasting affect it has on sokka,,,,
-i can also imagine her on the ace spectrum
-she's so sapphic she's so queer bro is literally the moON?? what's more sapphic than the moon
-so, whatever, I'll say she's bi with a STRONG female lean. if she'd survived and joined the gaang she would have dated both sokka and suki and i truly believe that
-she would've loved suki and i just KNOW it
-love her so much let my girl be free of her arranged marriage
ty lee
-lesbian or pansexual. was ready to risk it all for mai. also completely down to be in a polycule
-she simply enjoyed male validation and attention due to her unmet childhood emotional needs. the dudes at the beach as well as sokka were giving massive comphet energy.
-i do also accept the possibility of her being pan, that'd be pretty great, but yknow, we do need more lesbians.
-despite being a fire nation citizen i think she'd be pretty open and liberated when it comes to her identity, at least wherever it's safe
-because her own ideology and philosophy is like. pseudo air nomad philosophy so i think she simply doesn't give a shit
-she is really into pride events. she LOVES the parade.
-i think she did have feelings for azula, at least as a child. then it all became really unhealthy,
-still, she felt sad about how things ended with azulw. she genuinely wishes it were different
mai
-she does also give comphet lesbian vibes BUT the "i love zuko more than I fear you" line SLAPS so I'm going to say bisexual with a female lean. she's also definitely asexual—and also demiromantic.
-ADORED ty lee, she just always assumed ty lee would choose azula
-it takes mai a long time to develop feelings for anyone, but when she falls she falls hard
-she's really not a big pride person, but she grows to enjoy it eventually. she goes with zuko and ty lee.
-she's not super vocal about her sexuality, but she also doesn't hide it. she doesn't give a shit. it's her business.
azula
-azula is a lesbian. not debatable like the others, to me.
-her feelings towards ty lee and mai are very reminiscent of sozin's feelings for roku i believe. like iykyk.
-she couldn't remember which of the boys was the one she was supposed to "like," but she remembered perfectly which bikini ty lee and mai were wearing. she picked chan like lesbians pick a random boy to crush on in middle school.
-and then she instesd remembered one of thr gusy who were flirting with either mai or ty lee. bestie was jealous.
-she had comphet, so much comphet. she wanted to be loved.
-so much internalised homophobia.
-she has a type, and it's brunette non benders of similar build. by which i mean ty lee and suki
-the ill will she holds towards mai in her comic for ruining their group over a stUpid BOY-
-it's comical,,
-i love her.
jet
-all the freedom fighters are queer
-jet is probably pansexual or bisexual. and also he/they
-he had a thing for katara but he sure as hell also had a thing for zuko
-he punches homophobes in the face
-i never liked jet when i was a kid because he was a jerk and i hated him with katara, but i grew to really enjoy his character and his arc
-this boy wants to eat the rich
-he doesn't want gay marriage, he wants to abolish marriage
smellerbee
-transfem ICON, she/her, though generally gender non conforming.
-and she's also also aromantic and asexual.
-queer platonic relationship with longshot, because of how deeply they love and understand and support each other
-if you misgender her on purpose the whole group will gang up on you and by the end of it you'll have four broken limbs and they'll be arrested for aggravated assault
longshot
-he's aromantic and asexual but he's got unmatched non-verbal autistic rizz
-as i said, QPR with smellerbee
-but all the freedom fighters plan to keep living together forever,, they're found family
-him and smellerbee just have a particularly special bond
the duke
-the duke is pansexual, i think
-i think he had a crush on toph
-also he/they
-and that's about all I've got
pipsqueak
-he/they/she
-pipsqueak's literally his chosen name, nothing cisgender about that,
-gay
sneers
-transmasc, he/they, potentially genderfluid
-dating kori who is bi
haru
-bisexual, female lean
-he/they, potentially genderfluid
teo
-gay, crush on aang
jin and song
-jin is pansexual, would definitely date song who is a lesbian
-zuko introduces them!!
uncle iroh
-straight ally. women are great! big womaniser back in his day.
-loves gay people
-huge support for zuko coming out
-that being said, he wasn't ALWAYS an ally. like he wasn't homophobic either, but he didn't support queer people before lu ten came out to him. then he accepted it, because he loved his son. finally, travelling the world and studying different philosophies led him to be a great ally.
-then he became the biggest ally ever amd a huge advocate for queer rights
-on a similar note, lu ten was gay. ozai was straight. zhao was straight and azulon was probably also straight. just getting them out of the wAy.
piandao
-gay gay gay. likes men.
-him and jeong jeong as a salty judgmental old couple is so real
-also everyone knows about it but nobody dares to give him shit for it
-he just glares and you immediately get off his back
-he could get himself a husband and nobody in the fire nation would do anything to stop him because they literally cannot arrest him
-he'll just shut the door on their face
jeong jeong
-also gay. big gay.
-tons of internalised homophobia, bless him
-tons of self hatred
-like, the way he sees his firebending as a curse of destruction and hatred and hates himself for it—instead of seeing all the colours of the dragons' rainbow fire, like zuko and aang, who symbolise the new generation
-it can work so well as a queer self-acceptance metaphor
-he definitely ends up with piandao, as i said before. begrudgingly in love.
hama
-lesbian. privately, as per water tribe tradition.
-nobody in the south gives her shit for it.
-she definitely had a relationship with kanna.
-when she lived in the fire nation, things were different. living as her authentic self was impossible—even secretly, it became near-impossible.
-hama's life is one big tragedy.
pakku
-straight. initially homophobic as per water tribe conservatism. the sort of, "just don't shove it in my face" homophobia
-but upon realising that like, both his friend group and his wife are incredibly queer, he gets over it
-iroh helps with educating him
-it's also canon that zuko gives the southern water tribe custody of hama after the war which i find incredibly sweet
-but since hama and kanna were... tight, I find myself incredibly entertained imagining possible interactions between pakku and hama
kanna (gran gran)
-kanna was bisexual.
-in the time she spent traveling from the north to the south she slept with a bunch of people
-fire nation pirates, sand bender bandits, earth kingdom soldiers... hakoda's father is a mystery. a mama mia situation.
-other flings include the herbalist, probably, (all old people know each other)
-even madame wu, why not?
-like it entertains me to think that kanna was unhinged the moment she left the Northern Water Tribe
-and being a non bender she used all tools at her disposal to reach the south if you know what i mean
-that being said, she also learned to fight a bit. probably. just to spite pakku.
-when she reached the south, she had a thing with hama. i say this because of the kataang parallel when hama was taken away.
hakoda and bato
-hakoda is bi, bato is gay
-hakoda loved kya, bato loved him secretly and never told him
-after kya died, bato was his only comfort, they fell in love
-once malina enters the situation too, it eventually ends up being a polycule
-note that i strongly dislike malina and those comics
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ddollfface · 2 months
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𝐀 𝐋𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐅𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐲
𝙆𝙖𝙩𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙞 𝙊𝙧𝙤𝙘𝙝𝙞 𝙔𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙃𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙘𝙖𝙣𝙤𝙣𝙨
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Warnings; bad writing, might be ooc (don't come at me lol), not proofread, obsessional behavior, idk if this is really Yandere tbh, honestly, this is just be dipping my toes into fanfiction... If I missed anything, then please let me know ♡ I've only watched the tv shows, so all of my information comes from that and the wiki. If anyone knows where to read the manga, then please message me! Also, this is inspired by @mothwingwritings and @yandere-writer-momo ♡
Throughout the series, Katsumi is shown to be loyal to those he deems close and important to him. One of these people is Karate (I suppose, it's a thing, but whatever). Even when faced with people he respects, like Retsu, he refuses to give it up, to deny the power it has. This is shown during the tournament saga where Retsu demands that Katsumi admit that Chinese Kenpō is superior to Karate, of course, he denies it.
Now, what does this say about Katsumi? Well, it shows that when he feels loyalty towards someone/something, he'll cling to it and fight for it until his last breath. Katsumi is strong-willed, and never gives in without a fight; he fights for others' honor. He's been shown to have a vengeance streak, where he'll seek out those he's deemed to have defamed the people he holds dear to him.
He's very smooth with his words and has a boyish charm to him, allowing you to drop your guard when you really shouldn't. His sheepish smile and constant cocky appeal cause you to feel relaxed and underestimate him, forgetting that he's a dangerous man who could snap you in half with his pinky. It's really too easy for him to find where you live, sneak into your apartment, and watch you. All without you noticing; how sweet of you. You don't even realize that Katsumi has grown so attached, not noticing how close he sticks to your side or how his eyes darken whenever you talk to Retsu or Katou (if he ever comes around).
I can imagine Katsumi with most types of darlings, but I think he'd lean towards darlings who are a Good Samaritan. How they show that empathetic behavior solely depends on their personality. You don't have to be energetic and bubbly to be a good person and to help others, instead, you can be quiet and timid. You can be a little colder, but as long as you're willing to step in and help others when they're in need, even if you might put yourself in danger, Katsumi will ultimately find you attractive and court you.
I think that the empathetic characteristic is the root of his attraction, seeing you be so kind and caring just makes his heart swell. He knows you're a good person, and that's what makes you so attractive. Well, you're appearance is also a key factor, but ignore that.
Katsumi just wants someone selfless and willing to put themselves on the line for others, no matter if they know the person or not, as he knows that they'd make a good partner, a good mama. That's ultimately Katsumi's goal in life: to have a family. I subscribe to the headcanon that Katsumi has a breeding kink and he loves children; I don't care what anybody says.
There's no doubt in my mind that he's a loverboy who just wants someone to love, but things go wrong when that love isn't recognized or reciprocated. Not only that, but Katsumi's love can be... overbearing, to say the least. He can get a little too excited, especially when he's around you. And that's when his boyish nature comes in. He becomes too aggressive with his courting tactics (this is similar to Ali Jr. and Baki, me thinks).
These three guys, especially Katsumi, have been shown to be a little blinded by arrogance and their youth (not saying that other characters, who are older, haven't). They're all in their early twenties, and Katsumi being twenty in the Pickle saga, meaning they don't have a lot of experience with women.
Now that we're on the topic of experience, I think that Katsumi has been on dates with women, talked to women, and flirted with women. I mean, look at him. He's attractive, both physically and emotionally, and he's in the prime of his life. Not only that, but he's the adoptive son of Doppo Orochi, though I doubt that matters to most girls, but whatever. This means that he's got money, a lot of it. Doppo's wealth has been reiterated throughout the series that Katsumi is a spoiled kid, and I see that point.
So there's no denying that girls are attracted to him, and I think Katsumi isn't afraid to go up to women; he's quite charismatic. But why doesn't he have a girl? I think that's partially because of his dedication to his martial arts, making it difficult to maintain a relationship, and most girls wouldn't stick around for that. Now, that factor wipes out half of his dating pool, making it difficult for him to have anything but a one-night stand or a few dates.
He can't help but long for someone deeper, long for someone who truly cares for him. Katsumi wants someone who needs him, and relies on him to be provided for, and cared for. He wants to be acknowledged for his hard work, how calloused his hands are, and how good of a leader he strives to be. He just wants someone who'd be his cheerleader, someone who'd support him the way he'd support them.
This drive and desperate need for someone causes him to act irrationally when he finally finds someone even close to his dreams. It doesn't matter where or when you meet, whether it's before or after he's lost his arm, as long as he feels that recognition, he's lovestruck.
(This is where I go off on a tangent, I'm so sorry)
I've read a book called Blink, by Malcolm Gladwell, and it's all about humans and how we think as a species. He goes on and on about this thing called thin slicing. Thin slicing is an ability that all humans have, something we've developed through years of evolution, and it's the ability to make a split-second decision (on a situation or person) based off of little information. According to Gladwell, we do this every day. Thin slicing is fueled by our fight or flight response, more so whether or not we fight, fight, or freeze.
Gladwell says that the moment we make eye contact with someone, or speak a singular word with someone, we've already decided whether or not we like them or not, whether or not we'll befriend them. In multiple studies, Gladwell cites, he says that you can determine whether or not a couple will have a long-lasting relationship just based off of one conversation, a conversation that's no more than a minute long.
It's all about subconscious cues we give off when we speak, much like the phrase 'actions speak louder than words.' Certain cues attract people to each other, unknowing actions that we do that pull others toward us.
Honestly, it's a really interesting thing, and I think that because a lot of Baki men rely on their instincts, and they use thin slicing in every one of their fights, they'll use their instincts to determine who their darlings are. If you were to ask any of the Baki men, in this hypothetical world where they have a darling, I think they wouldn't be able to answer. That they wouldn't know. And that's because it was an instinctual decision, something they knew subconsciously the moment they met you, you, you.
There was just something about you that drew them in, and they would be able to give a broad definition, but they wouldn't be able to tell specifics. And that's the beauty of attraction, so if you think about it, love at first sight is a real thing, yeah?
End of tangent
Because of this, he'll take any one of your interactions and dramatize them. You say that it's cold outside? Now, he thinks you're trying to hint to him that you want his jacket (you don't; you were making small talk). You say that you think his hair looks nice today? Welp, that means you must want to play with his hair, right (Natsue just told you he got a haircut). Hell, your shoulders brush against each other while you two are walking? You're practically telling him that you want a hug! (No, you just were too close to the street).
The point is that any normal reaction or conversation is used to fuel his obsession with you. Within a few weeks of knowing each other, he's thinking that you're going to be the mama of his children. There's no doubt in his mind that you're meant to be. Katsumi will even look at your zodiacs. Did you know that you two are compatible? What a coincidence. It must be fate.
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mulderscully · 16 days
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i know it's a silly harhar joke and i find it funny too but characters like alex and buck not realizing they're bisexual for a long time isn't because they're stupid. it's not because they necessarily dislike being attracted to men. it's because of bisexual erasure within both heterosexual and queer space being rampant for a long time and is only starting to get better now. bisexuals make up around 60% of the lgbt+ community, (in the us) but look how long the wikipedia page for bisexual erasure is.
not only do more women/afab people identify as bisexual, but keep in mind that bisexual people overall are much less likely to identify as bisexual to others or be out than gay and lesbian people because part of the bisexual experience is feeling like you're not allowed to even sit at the table, so to speak. most bisexual+ men may have queer feelings and experiences, but they may not examine those things as much as a bisexual women might because biphobia and the patriarchy tie together in a way that is unique to bisexual men.
characters like alex and buck are so impactful because they're new. most bisexual representation in tv and film has been women until recently, and even that is still rare. a character like callie torres on grey's in 2009 — when i was 14! — helped me see myself as a bisexual, but men have not had characters like that until nearly ten years later. and it's not until i even read rwrb in 2020 that i saw any bisexual character not receive some degree of biphobia from their love interest.
representation is important because when we see someone experience what we experience it helps us name something we may not have fully understood about ourselves before and put a name to it because they're on that same journey on screen. alex and buck were always bi, they just didn't know they were allowed to be so. they're not stupid, they were failed by society and had to unlearn their own internalized biphobia and bisexual erasure because so many of us, even subconsciously, think we're not allowed to exist and/or to take up space in a community that we are literally in the acronym of. no one really talks about us except us.
you're not stupid if you didn't know you were bi the whole time, you're not stupid for not knowing when you were a teenager or in your twenties either.
(*i am genderfluid/nb but am mostly using m/f here for the sake of this specific conversation. bisexual nb people exist too.)
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cafeleningrad · 5 months
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Ohtori is such a disorienting place. It's so emblematic that none of the actual needs of the people in it are met. In fact it gives answers but none actually are satisfying for anyone yet the answers are presented as only alternative. ("You have to revolutionize the world (by participating in the duels that ensure the world continues to run on the same old dynamic.)"
What system Ohtori, Akio by proxy, proposes is the idea of power over another. It's very gendered power as we learn later. Women's power exists either as extension's of a man (Nanami's high social status by virtue of being Touga's little sister), be inspired to have power by extension of a man (Wakaba), surrendering to a man (Kozue), or can be easily taken away power if a man decides that the woman had enough power (Juri,Utena). In the instance a woman has power it's also used to dominate others just like men do. (Nanami being cruel to others, to Tsuwabuki in particular, Utena treating Anthy her a puzzle piece to her princely identity.) In the end there is an idea how someone who should hold all the power should be like (the Prince), and they're given free reign. However that's not what the characters need.
Touga is entirely helpless to his paternal CSA. Akio's proposition is to become, for once, the one in charge of others so none can exploit him again. And Touga fails to see how Akio still exploits him by directing Touga, with quiet implicit imagery stressing that dynamic. What Touga would have needed was protection and a trusting family.
Nanami grew up so isolated and shamed for diverging from the norm, she is entirely dependent on external subjects and objects to define her. Either it's being defined by her relationship to Touga which is the entire basis of her social status, and her only hope for affection. Nanami can only define herself by traditional feminine and classicist means like her perceived ideal femininity, and brand-name jewelry which can easily turn on her, if external voices tell her that she should wear something. Nanami is so desperate for affection, being cared and loved for but the only language she is given is Ohtori's language of "men and women are only corresponding romantically". She can't express her need for familial proximity to Touga. The only other form of gaining adoration she knows is by violence, be it Touga's kitten, Tsuwabuki, or beating her three nameless underlings into submission.
It's not until the third arc that we learn about the Kaoru twins are in the middle of their parents separating. Their childhood is getting disrupted. Both of them are longing for time of connection and chance to hold onto each other. But Ohtori tells them that Miki can only adore Kozue as innocent and helpless. Kozue, like Nanami, gets told that her only chance to express affection to her male twin is by a sexualized, romanticized interaction. For two characters who're living through turbulent times, and need some stability in the other, twisting their chance of proximity is exactly the wrong answer.
Saionji really wants to remain friends with Touga he admires so much. (If not being in love with him.) Even more than Juri, he knows that the duel platform is just a set up, he swallows Touga's poison of "true friendship doesn't exist" again and again. The only chance of proximity to Touga is to disrespect others, demonstrate superiority over them, especially Anthy, as best proxy to a close male-male-dynamic. Saionji's only given path is to delude himself further and further.
Juri pushes so many people away because she's afraid her homosexuality will be revealed. Ohtori as a place does punish homosexuality severely, see Mikage's twisted memory, Ruka trying to converse Juri. This place convinces Juri over and over again that she's wrong for loving Shiori. But the truth is, Shiori is so much in love with Juri that she will resort to abuse her emotional power as long as it serves the purpose of Juri remaining close to her. What they would have needed is the chance to know that actually they're safe to be honest, at least to each other.
Utena is deeply grief-stricken by her parent's death. As a child the idea that everything will fade is terrifying. The only alternative she is shown is that Anthy's suffering is eternal. She wants to help. But the only path for being admired and adored is becoming a prince. The only agency to help and save others is by exercising the prince's power over someone. Akio becomes even crueler by trying to convince Utena that a girl's actual aspiration is romance (with a man). What else should she want? It also distract her from her genuine compassion for Anthy, and wishing for Anthy's happiness.
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With All That I Am
Billy Russo x Female Reader
Part 7 of my Accidentally on Purpose Series
Warnings: Hospitals, injury recovery, cockwarming, oral (f receiving), angst, hurt/comfort.
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SIX MONTHS AGO
There's something about Dominic Saintclair that Billy had never liked.
He could never put his finger on it. Maybe it was the pretentiousness of his actions, the way he looked like he'd never had a hard day in his life, the lackadaisical way he treated things as if they were replaceable.
The way he didn't understand that the most valuable thing he had, was the one thing he was mistreating right now.
"I swear, she doesn't know when to leave me alone." Dominic says loudly in the opulent bar, a place that was more red velvet seats and accented gold ornaments than anything else. It was somewhere Billy brought the clients he could impress easily, ones that didn't understand what the best brand of gin for a negroni was, or that whiskey shouldn't be served with ice. It was simply a place that glittered, gorgeous on the surface with no real substance... or character... not unlike the man in question.
Billy looks down at Dominic's cloned phone. All you had said was that you hoped he was having fun. 
"Maybe you're just not fucking her enough." One of his friends joke.
"Oh fuck off. I fuck her more than enough, maybe that's why she's so needy." It gets a round of laughter from his friends, and a disgusted frown from Billy.
At the bar, only a few tables away, Billy's hand tightens on his glass of whiskey, his back is to the group, and he's positioned in a dark enough corner to be unnoticed while still being able to hear the conversation.
"Anyways, enough about that, finish telling me about the red head." Dominic says, and Billy is forced to listen to him talk about other women when he has the best one.
Billy thinks about how stupidly simple it would be to kill your boyfriend, but doing it now would create more problems. You wouldn't know how much of an asshole he really was, for starters, you'd probably convince yourself that you'd been deeply in love with him before his untimely death. People tended to put dead loved ones on a pedestal, forgiving them unless their crimes were truly heinous. 
No, you had to see Dominic for his true colours first. Then, and only then, he would wipe your stain of a boyfriend from the earth.
Billy listens to Dominic say some more vile things, fully understanding his hatred for the man now. Dominic was manipulative, showing you one face, and yet secretly thinking something else behind your back. With a frown, he scrolls through your older messages.
You always seemed to be reaching for him, supportive of the things he said. He never voiced his support for you in return. 
What a fucking waste of space. To have someone as precious as you, and to take you for granted.
If he had you... he'd worship you. Without a doubt, Billy would kiss every inch of your skin, kneel at your feet if you asked, kiss you at every waking moment.
When another text comes in from you, he smiles.
As predicted, you text a second time after you've seen his read receipts and no response has come in from your idiot boyfriend.
'Are you alright?' You text.
The corner of Billy's mouth lifts, he wishes you were sending texts like this to him.
Dominic responds.
'Yes. I'm fine. Stop bothering me.'
Billy's smile drops.
You don't respond, but you see the message. He knows that you're hurt by it.
Billy's thoughts go violent again.
Anonymously, Billy has bought round after round of shots for the men, until they're wasted, and their lips are loose and he can soak in all the information possible. He plots while he listens, and he learns so much, until he could pick apart any man there in his sleep.
Their numbers dwindle, until it's just two men there, and he waits patiently for Dominic to stand on inebriated feet and head off to the bathroom.
Billy knows that Dominic is barely functional right now, having taken shot after shot, Billy is aware that Dominic will not remember any bit of whatever is happening right now.
With that information, he texts Dominic's companion from the cloned phone.
'Feeling better now, ordered an Uber, you can go ahead without me.'
Billy watches his friend read the text, finish his drink and then leave.
Too easy.
Dominic is so far gone that when he returns to his seat, he barely notices that his friend's things are gone, and Billy acts fast to stop Dominic from realising that anything is amiss.
"Saintclair." Billy greets, whiskey in hand, looking around to make sure that no one is looking, "Drinking all by yourself?" 
Dominic looks up at Billy and squints.
"Mister Russo?"
Billy hums the affirmative.
"Got room for company?" The words are bitter in his mouth.
Billy doesn't wait for an answer, pushing the inebriated man deeper into the booth and sliding into the space next to him. He hates this place, literally just designed for showing off, he glances at Dominic, who's lost in his own head, staring at his drink.
Nothing this man was thinking could ever be worth your time.
He raises his hand to the bartender, calling for another round of shots.
Dominic only has time to adjust his body, from his slumped, hazy demeanour, to appear like someone with all their critical thinking skills functional.
Billy spikes the drink with a little bit of melatonin, it's more than enough at Dominic's current level of intoxication.
"Wasn't drinking by myself, but the rest of guys have already left." Dominic slurs, and Billy raises his eyebrows, extending the spiked shot to the already drunk man.
He gives Dominic the opportunity to decline the shot, doesn't force it into his hands, just holds it out expectantly and watches the younger man choose his own self-destruction.
He kind of delights in it, the anarchy he's capable of. Each person has a role to play and it's always nice when they do it as expected.
Dominic throws back the shot with him and internally, Billy begins his internal stopwatch.
"I hope the job's treating you well." Billy hums, uncaring of what the man next to him has to say. He just has to make small talk for fifteen minutes, before the drug kicks in.
Billy asks about some of his coworkers, and then his phone pings, alerting him to a message. 
"Clingy." Is all Dominic has to say, looking at his phone when Billy inquires casually.
His eyebrows raise, watching his employee yawn, the drug beginning to take effect.
"If you don't like her that much, then why are you with her?" Billy asks, trying to keep the anger out of his tone.
"Why not?" Is the last thing Dominic says before he slumps over onto the table, asleep.
Billy blinks, an angry sneer growing on his face. What a careless piece of shit. He reaches for Dominic's phone, unlocks it and opens your messages the way he's done a hundred times before.
'At least tell me you're okay.' You'd texted.
"Prick." Billy swears, typing out a message to you on Dominic's phone.
'I'm alright sweetness, just getting ready to go home.' After a moment, he sends another message.
'I'm sorry about that last message, you don't bother me.'
He finds himself smiling when your text bubbles appear almost immediately.
'That's alright! I understand that you probably just wanted some time with your friends.' You say.
You were so quick to forgive, it made Billy's heart sour with the thought that Dominic didn't deserve your forgiveness.
'How was your night?' He asks, smiling fondly when he gets a picture of you wearing a fluffy robe and face mask.
'Very pretty, baby.' He replies, which earns a little '😳' face in response.
How sweet you were, saccharine and sticky, Billy could find himself eating you up quite easily.
'I mean it. I think you're fucking gorgeous.'
It takes a moment to get your response.
'How much have you had to drink exactly?'
Billy grits his teeth, looking over at the unconscious fuck. He barely ever tells you how pretty you are. It's why you think he's drunk now.
'A bit, but that doesn't make it any less true. You are beautiful.'
You don't respond immediately, Billy spends five minutes refreshing Dominic's phone until he gets a very shy 'Thank you,' in response.
He smiles, pockets Dominic's phone.
"Time to get you home, Saintclair." He says to the unconscious man.
He gets someone from the bar to help him get Dominic into the back seat of his car, uncaring of how he's placed, thanking the larger man with a hefty tip before getting into his car.
'You didn't tell me what you did today.' He sends before driving off.
He hears several different message notifications while he drives, and he can't help smiling, because for once, you were finally talking to him, and not as a stranger, but as someone familiar.
It was much harder to get Dominic to his apartment due to the lack of help he'd had from earlier, yet Billy made do with tossing the unconscious man over his shoulder, and then putting him down when they were in the elevator.
Billy really could have left Dominic anywhere, at the bar, or at the front steps to his apartment, or even at the door, with his keys in hand to have him wake up there in the morning horrified that he was so drunk he couldn't even make it inside.
But Billy drops Dominic on his bed instead, after accidentally bumping his head on a few door frames, he decides that he'd keep the drunk asshole safe this time...for you.
After, Billy sits in Dominic's living room, and opens up his phone once more.
'Okay, this doesn't mean anything but I went to a jewellery store today. I was looking at earrings and then I couldn't help looking at the engagement rings.'
Oh? Billy thinks.
'They were all shiny and even though I like shiny, they didn't feel like me you know? I feel like if we ever... uhhhh.... you know.... get married, I'd want something more unique you know?'
'Hello? Are you there? Did I scare you off? This isn't me asking for a wedding, I'm just saying.'
'Dominic?'
Billy sucks in a breath.
'I'm here, sorry, just got home.' he replies, tries to ignore the pain inside of him that worsens with the thought of you getting married to anyone other than him.
'Oh... Hi' you respond.
Billy smiles.
'Hi, do you have any ideas of what you think might be for you?'
He can almost see your excitement.
'Are you sure? If this is weird, you can say so.'
How cute, the way you care.
'I'd really like to see them.' He answers.
You send a link, and indeed, they're beautiful and unique and Billy can't help the thoughts of wearing it, and having you wear the other.
'These are the ones I've always dreamed of.' you add on with the attached pictures.
He bites down on his bottom lip, closes his eyes, and imagines how perfect your hands would look linked together, decorated with matching rings. The thought makes him hard.
'They have to be custom ordered though, really expensive, I'm sure we can find something cheaper.'
Absolutely not.
'They're beautiful. Tell me your ring size so that I can surprise you.'
He makes note of it when you send it.
'I can't wait to marry you.' He says.
'Well now I know you really are drunk.' You respond.
Billy has a quick moment of realisation when he remembers that you think you're talking to Dominic.
His smile drops.
'I am drunk. But you're still the most amazing person on the planet. I think you might be it for me.' And Billy means it. He means every word. He plans to marry this sweet girl that waltzed her way into his life and believed in him after two conversations.
'I love you.' Comes your reply.
Billy smiles.
'I love you too.' 
He stays with you until you fall asleep, telling you all the sweet things he's ever wanted to say, dodging personal topics that he doesn't know the answers to. When you're finally asleep, he stands, checks the time, and goes back to Dominic's room, dropping his phone onto the bed beside his sleeping form.
Billy almost considers hitting him, enjoying the thought of giving him a black eye in the morning, but that had the possibility of scaring him into not drinking again, and Billy couldn't have that.
So he leaves, walks out of your boyfriend's apartment, and does not set it on fire like he wants to. 
.
NOW
You stare calmly at the elevator doors. The smell of hospital filling the air around you. In a way, there was an ease to it, a comfort in the sterile cleanliness, a place designed to turn chaos into order.
You sip on your coffee, feeling refreshed after popping back home for a quick shower and supplies for Billy. You didn't want to leave, but you knew you wouldn't be able to stay while the nurses changed his bandages, the wound too fresh to introduce any foreign bacteria. So you'd decided to make yourself useful in the meantime.
Frank was still here somewhere, waiting for you to return so that he could leave. You'd both had tentatively agreed that Billy should not be left alone under any circumstance, surprised that you and his best friend had been on a similar wavelength when it came to caring for him.
Frank's in the waiting room taking a call when you see him. He gives you a little nod, and a gesture of his head that tells you it's okay to go see him.
You do exactly that, making your way to the nurses' station to sign in before heading to his room.
You stop short when at the door, you hear the sound of female laughter. 
It's not laughter exactly, it's... giggling.
It's obviously flirtatious, in that pitch that's just too high to be normal.
You hear Billy's voice next, too far away to make out what he's saying but he sounds polite.
Followed by more giggling.
Pure jealousy rears its head. 
You had only been gone for an hour and someone had taken the opportunity to begin flirting with your husband? 
Something dark blooms inside you, and you take a deep breath, and walk through the doors with your head high.
Two pairs of eyes turn to look at you.
"I'm back." You say calmly, smiling.
Billy smiles at you, his hair askew in every direction as if he hasn't ever heard of a brush. It's adorable, makes him look so much more boyish than usual. Your eyes go to the young nurse, that's currently taking Billy's blood pressure, quietly sizing her up, deciding if she was worth any sort of trouble at all.
"Hey baby, did you get one of those for me?" He asks, referring to the cappuccino in your hands.
You look down at him, close enough to see the tiredness under his eyes although you know this is the most amount of sleep he's ever gotten.
"Sorry, doctor said no." You respond.
Billy lets out a pained groan, and you can't help it, leaning forward to place a soft kiss on his temple.
He sighs, reaching up to take your hand in his, you watch his eyes linger on your wedding ring.
"I was just explaining to Becca here how easy it was to ignore the pain for so long."
Becca?
Your eyebrows raise in amused displeasure.
"Yeah," she adds in with a wistful smile, "If he didn't pass out from the pain he probably wouldn't have gotten help in time."
Great, a reminder that you weren't there when he'd almost died. You're pretty sure that the only expression you show her is one of disdain.
'Careful,' you think maliciously in her direction, 'If he likes you enough he'll cage you like a bird.'
"How are his vitals?" You ask blankly, trying to get her out of here as soon as possible, ignoring the way Billy looks up at you in confusion at your clipped tone.
"They're uh, they're good! But-" She begins to say, but stops short and presses the back of her hand to Billy's forehead. You blink, clenching your teeth together. You're pretty sure this wasn't medically professional, and you suck in a slow breath to stop yourself from smacking her hand away from your husband.
"Are you feeling okay Bil- Mister Russo? Your heart rate is a bit high." she continues.
You glance up at her monitor in question, and sure enough the little number on screen next to the pulsing heart symbol was just a little above one hundred.
You knew that his heart shouldn't be going at near a hundred beats per minute if he was mostly stationary in bed.
Billy lets out a nervous laugh. You look down at him in confusion.
"Yean, that's- I'm fine- It's just... well... her." He explains, glancing up at you for a second.
Me? You think incredulously, blinking.
His heart is beating fast because you were near him?
Your anger dissolves as fast as it had appeared, stomach fluttering, you try to fight the smile pulling at your face but you inevitably fail.
He doesn't look up at you, so you grip his jaw, tilting his head up.
Absentmindedly, you're aware of the nurse excusing herself from the room.
You press your lips to his swiftly, delight spreading down your body when he groans against your mouth. You deepen the kiss and he accepts it eagerly.
After a moment, you pause, turning your head to look at the little monitor, His heart rate having gone up to one hundred and twenty.
"Still jealous?" he asks, with a cheeky smile.
You don't answer, leaning in to kiss him softly once more.
"Please." Billy begs.
"No." You whisper, bumping your nose against his, adjusting your body under the sheets so that you're both fully covered.
"Just a little bit." He tries to bargain.
"You move, and I'll stop. You cum, and I'll stop." 
He lets out a harsh breath.
"You're being really mean to me." He pouts.
"If you rip a stitch, I won't touch you until they come out."
He groans, frustrated.
Unable to resist, you clench around his cock.
"That's not fair." he gasps desperately.
"Sorry, this isn't entirely easy for me either."
Currently, you were both under his sheets, on your back, both legs draped over his hip, while he lies on his left side facing you. It was a position that had made it very easy for him to slip himself inside of you, allowing you to keep his cock warm. 
He swallows, looking at you with warm eyes.
"You feel so good around me. You know that?"
How was he allowed to say things like that while literally stretching you open? God, you could feel the tip of his cock nestled snugly in the very deepest parts of you, every inch of your cunt sighing in relief at finally being so full of him.
You feel yourself get smaller under his gaze, soft, gentle, unnameable in its unfamiliarity.
"If it feels half as good as it does for me, then yeah, I know." you reply easily.
He smiles, it causes butterflies to flutter in gentle circles within you.
"You're beautiful." he murmurs softly.
It's your turn to swallow and look away.
Your eyes are drawn to his bare chest, and the snake tattoo that resides on his shoulder. He could not be real with the way he made you feel, like all the air in the room had simply vanished by his command, held even further out of reach by the thickness of his cock sitting still inside you.
"You really mean that?" You ask, your insecurity gaining a foothold in your head.
He reaches for your left hand, raises it up to his face so that he can lay a swift kiss onto your wedding ring.
"I do." 
The door swinging open has your eyes widening from your shared spot under the sheets. Thankfully, you were still mostly clothed, where Billy was fully naked.
"Bill?" comes Frank's voice in question from his spot by the door.
Billy winks at you, before moving the sheet off your top halves to reveal you both to the open air.
"Hey Frank." Billy greets.
Frank takes one look at your positions and lets out a tired sigh.
"You two are fucking, aren't you?" The exasperated sound of his voice drawing a smile from you.
You can't help the laugh that leaves you, giving everything away. 
Frank's disappointed expression makes Billy laugh too.
"Alright. I'm walking out this door, I'll be back in five minutes, your pants better be on, Russo."
"Make it ten!" Billy shouts just as Frank gives another disappointed shake of his head, and leaves the room.
.
Clothed now, in long blue linen pants, Billy kisses your temple, one arm wrapped securely around you as you lie beside him.
"Thanks for being here with me." He says softly, his hands gripping onto any available part of you he could reach, anything to pull you closer to him.
"What? Is Frank not good enough company?" You tease, beginning to laugh when you feel the scratch of his beard as he kisses your throat.
"Frank is usually in the bed beside me." he says into your neck, and you laugh at the imagery.
"Plus," he says in a softer, more serious tone as he pulls away for a moment. You turn to look at him curiously.
"I've never had someone worry about me the way you do."
"Ever?" You ask.
He shakes his head, looks down.
You're not sure what he's thinking, but it looks like guilt, all soft lines and sadness and you ache to make him feel better.
You lean forward, cupping his jaw. His eyes are so open for you that you think you can see his soul in them- a dark web of shadows, that glitters with vulnerability the more you look. 
You wanted his vulnerability, you wanted him to open himself up to you, and share everything he was, everything he could be, until you were full of him.  
Until you could taste him in your mouth, even when he wasn't around.
"I'm here now, and I'll worry. I'll fight anyone that stops me from getting to you. Including Frank Castle." You promise.
His frown grows into a smile.
"You're sure you don't wanna ride me? I'll stay really still." 
You groan.
"No, no vigorous activity for at least four weeks."
"You riding me isn't vigorous."
"Yes, but I'd consider your orgasms vigorous." You reply, contemplating the way the muscles of his abdomen tended to tighten up when he came.
"Wait," Billy says in horror, "I can't come for four weeks?"
"You'll be fine." You huff.
"No I won't be." He protests.
"Just let me take care of you."
He couldn't argue with that.
"You hate me don't you?" Billy asks.
You try not to grin.
You turn to face him, clad in only your plainest underwear as you get ready for work. Somehow, he still saw beauty in you, even when you weren't trying. It was exhilarating.
Unfortunately you couldn't stay with him, a meeting had been scheduled that you didn't want to push back due to the difficulty in actually getting the meeting in the first place.
"Why? Is there something wrong with it?" You ask, turning playfully to show him the back and the front.
"Everything's fucking wrong with it," Billy grumbles from his spot in bed, head tilting back for a second in what looks like a plea to God himself.
"When I get these stitches out, you're gonna be in so much trouble." he says with a little grunt.
You hum, in thought.
"You know, now that I think about it, I don't think I'll wear underwear today." You taunt.
Billy groans loudly.
Something delightful blooms within you.
Wrong.
This was supposed to be wrong.
The more you think that, the more you know that this is the most right feeling in the world.
There was nothing in your old life that could ever possibly compare to him.
Usually, people coerced into marriage were subjected to inhumane treatment, impossible and abusive environments, that sucked the very living soul out of them.
The most soul sucking being done to you was when you'd been forced to deny Billy the pleasure of tasting you last night.
The pleasure of tasting you... because to him... it really was a pleasure.
You swallow, sitting at his desk, tense in his comfortable chair. You'd become someone he'd wanted.
Or maybe you'd always been. When had he decided to marry you anyways?
You blink, shock spearing through you.
What if your feelings weren't real? But simply a defence response to your circumstances.
A tired sigh leaving your lips. A shake of your head.
Would you want him if you weren't trapped by him? 
The question eats away at your sanity. You spin it around and around in your head and still you can't find an answer.
You're scared by it. By the notion of losing him.
You're also scared by the idea of staying with him, still not fully understanding what he was capable of.
Which fear was right?
And which one would break your heart? 
Billy says your name in question when he hears a door slam shut.
"Just me, Bill." Is Frank's answering voice.
"Where is she?" He murmurs, throat dry, looking up at the ceiling. The pain meds held him in a state of mild confusion, spaced out so that he wasn't in any pain, but unable to truly focus on the things happening around him.
He hears the slow pour of water, peeks an eye open to find Frank beside him. He struggles to sit up, tucking a second and then third pillow behind him for support and gratefully accepting the glass of water from Frank.
"It's only two, her meeting just started so you'll see her a little later."
Billy nods, ignoring Frank's gaze as he sips the water.
"I've never seen you so down bad before."
Billy's laugh bubbles in the glass he's holding.
"What can I say? I'm a romantic." He answers flippantly.
Frank snorts loudly in knowing disbelief. Billy frowns.
"You don't think it's fast? Is she... does she have something on you?"
Anger spears itself through Billy, some at Frank, most at himself.
I'm a monster, he thinks.
He turns away, not wanting Frank to read the expression on his face, wondering if his look of guilt alone will put the pieces together in Frank's head.
"It's not like that." He says easily, thinking to himself what a sick fuck he must be to coerce someone so glorious, so awe-inspiring, into marriage against her will.
He thinks he hates himself for it.
"She told me you got accidentally married. I can't imagine a version of you, however drunk, that would accept marriage."
Frank was getting too close. Billy had to say something to appease him.
"I'd met her before, at... a company party or two. I liked her, but she had a boyfriend."
When Billy doesn't continue, Frank is forced to prompt.
"And?" 
Billy stares down at the sheets. The very sheets you'd slept under last night.
"And when I met her in Vegas, they'd just broken up, and I wanted something with her, and I don't remember how, but the next day I woke up married to her and I was so happy."
It's mostly the truth, the best tale he can spin in his state.
"I know it doesn't make sense, Frankie, but when I'm with her... I'm the man I've always wanted to be."
Frank is quiet for too long now, and Billy is forced to turn his head and look up at his best friend curiously.
Both men stare at each other in silence for a moment.
"Alright, okay, I'm sold, bring her around to meet Maria and the kids." Frank says finally.
If anything, this was Frank Castle's ultimate seal of approval. Introducing strangers to his family was not an occasion to be taken lightly.
Billy grins up at Frank.
"I can't believe I had to lose my appendix to get her invited to a Castle family dinner. You're so gullible, Frank." Billy teases.
He's rewarded with a gentle smack to his shoulder.
You run your hands over the fabric of your dress, deep in thought.
Was it too much? You think you might be overdressed.
It was a lovely beige colour, maybe tan, knee length with a vintage design and little puff sleeves. You'd liked how it looked in the store. Now? You honestly felt like it was a little much.
Maybe Billy would be able to help you decide.
You call his name, walking out of your shared closet and toward the living room where you saw him last.
You spin the corner and find him already coming toward you.
"Are you okay?" He asks, dressed casually in a grey shirt and black pants.
You stumble over your words, your brain spinning too fast for you to keep up.
"W- yeah- I was coming to ask your opinion, but I am so clearly overdressed." You turn on your heel to go back into the bedroom.
"Oh no you don't." Billy says, and before you know it, he's grabbed a hold of your wrist, pulling you into his body.
You gasp, eyes widening on his face as he presses you against the wall of the hallway.
Your heart pounds in your chest at his proximity. Your need for him outweighs rational thought until you have to remind yourself that he's still recovering. If he touched you right now though, he'd find you already wet, and eager for him.
While you've been fighting your aching desire, he's taken the time to run the tips of his fingers across the apple of your cheek.
"God. You're so pretty." He whispers, warm eyes spilling euphoria into you.
He couldn't mean that. Could he?
You glance away, only to be forced into looking back at him when he grabs your jaw roughly.
The tension between you feels like an electric charge, that heightens as he gets closer. 
It's like he's never touched you before, like the sensation is brand new, and not months old. 
"I should change," You whisper, "This dress is too much."
He takes a deep breath, his hand glides from gripping your jaw to curl around your throat. Your breath stutters at the feeling. Something flutters low, an ache to be filled rears its head.
"You're gorgeous. In anything you wear. I'd want you in a ball gown or a potato sack."
Good lord.
When you smile, he brings his fingers up to press against your lips, exploring the shape of your smile, appreciating the softness.
"You mean that?" You ask, a little unsure.
His dark eyes devour you, unfocused as he looks at you, balancing on the precipice of admiring you and imagining just exactly what he wants to do to you.
"Why don't I show you?" He offers.
You reach to grip his elbows when it seems like he's going to kneel.
"No, we- you're still recovering and I don't think it's fair that I get to cum if you can't."
He lets out a low grunt, pressing his body roughly against yours, his palms against the wall on either side of your head, his forehead and nose pressed to yours. The intensity of his gaze makes you turn your head to look away, he's got the demeanour of a man starved, desperate, borderline unhinged.
He doesn't let you move far, fingers curling around the back of your neck to bring you back to face him.
"Little wife," he says so deeply that you're not sure if it's a promise or a threat.
"Lift your dress up for me, or I'll tie you up and lick your cunt anyway."
You gulp. The very thought of being helpless while he-
Fuck, but you didn't even have the time, Frank would be expecting you in an hour. 
You let out a breath, feeling more than seeing the smile that forms on his face as you begin gathering the materials of your skirt into your fists.
"Good." he says finally, and you can only feel your body throb with heat in response.
There's the gentlest kiss to your mouth, something of a promise, a pledge that when he's done with you, you won't remember how to walk.
You squeeze your eyes shut as he kneels, you know that when he reaches up to tug your underwear down the length of your legs, that he'll see the desperation he causes.
He swears when he sees it, drawing out the syllables as he witnesses the way your arousal clings to the little piece of fabric protecting your modesty.
You swallow, the materials bunched in your hands no doubt wrinkling with the force.
He takes his time, tracing coarse fingers over your calve, behind your knee and up your thigh, pulling gently to guide one of your legs over his shoulder. 
He doesn't bother to touch your centre, circle your sweet bud with his thumb like he wants to, he uses his tongue right away.
You take in a sharp breath at the contact. The tip of his tongue meeting your clit affectionately, like old friends reuniting.
A shiver goes down your spine, you crush your bottom lip between your teeth.
"Billy." You whisper softly, tilting your head back as his tongue flattens on you.
He takes it slow, remarkably gentle on your hypersensitive body, having gone relatively long in recent times without an orgasm, you feel like just the right move will pull you apart at the seams.
You let out a little groan, sighing as his pace quickens, his tongue pushing deeper, so that he can get a taste of you directly from the source.
It's primal, soft, ritualistic in the way that his tongue worships you, your eyes rolling back in your head as he draws you close to your peak.
There's an obscene sucking sound, followed closely by a hum of pleasure from between your legs. You feel your body tense, coiled tight on the precipice of bliss, thighs trembling as he keeps his tongue focused on your clit, lapping gently, and then a little harsher, to be gentle again.
His beard scratches your thighs, and even that is an aphrodisiac by itself, reminding you constantly that it's his mouth on you, his tongue on your cunt, his head between your thighs.
A sharp whine of warning, your stomach tightens, your breath stutters. 
A groan of approval from him, the soft twist of his fingers on your skin, as if to encourage you, to tell you how good you're being for him, and all you ever want to do now is be good for him.
Being deconstructed by his mouth should be a lot harder, and yet, Billy makes it look like a basic endeavour.
Your toes curl, head knocking the wall, you feel like you're coming apart, atom by atom, the force of your pleasure barely contained within your skin. You feel the walls of your cunt clamp down into a tight vise, as wave after wave of bliss fills every square inch of your body.
You barely make more than a quiet gasp- too inebriated on his tongue to even scream. 
He keeps licking you gently, lazily, trembling shudders working through your system until you're forced to tap his shoulder for a reprieve.
Another obscene sound when he pulls away, looking up at you, his mouth and beard shiny with your release.
He puts you back on two feet, but your knees buckle once the full weight of you is on them.
He stands swiftly, arms wrapping around you to pull you to his body keeping you upright, a small grunt leaving him.
You blink, struggling to restart your brain.
You realise his grunt is one of pain, as he tries to hold you up, it's what kickstarts your brain into working.
You grip his biceps, straightening your legs under you and willing them to stay that way.
"Sorry." You whisper, trying to take a deep breath.
"It's alright. If I could, I would have picked you up myself." He whispers back, and you raise your head to look into his eyes.
Something unnameable passes between you, you can't put a finger on it- but it feels like quiet appreciation for each other. 
He helps you to the couch, sitting you down before disappearing into the bathroom.
When he re-emerges, it's with a clean face and a damp washcloth. 
He encourages you down to the car after cleaning you and redressing you. You try to tell him that you're capable- but he won't have it.
He slides into the back of the car beside you, and almost immediately tucks your body against his, pulling your legs over one of his for comfort.
You sag, still fatigued from such a powerful orgasm.
Jesus, was it always going to be like that? All mind-consuming and explosive?
You smile when he kisses your forehead, tilting your head up to let him kiss you softly on the mouth.
Delightful, consuming, everything about him was just so... tantalising, you wanted to spend hours learning him, take days to map every thought in his head, every idea in his heart.
He was a dangerous enigma, a slippery slope.
And you were falling. 
When Frank pulls the door to his house open, he gives you both a very suspicious look.
After a moment, he lets out a long sigh of disappointment.
"You two better not fuck in my house." He threatens.
"How can you even tell?" Billy asks in disbelief, reading into the quiet accusations being made by Frank.
"Isn't it obvious?" Frank asks, opening the door wider to let you in.
"Hi Frank," you say in greeting as you walk past him. He says your name, with a small nod of acknowledgement.
You take a moment to appreciate their house, it's warm and cozy, with lots of baseball trophies lining the mantle over the fireplace. There's a lot of pinks and beiges, a cozy line of couches near the fire.
Before you can do more looking, you hear a woman's voice.
"Is that them?" She asks, spinning into the room.
This must be Maria, you think, as you watch her take Billy into an aggressive hug, giving him a kiss to the cheek before letting him go in a flourish, a look of violation comically painted on his face.
When she turns to you next, you gulp.
She's very pretty, with lovely auburn hair. You notice a large scar curving from the corner of her eye down to the edge of her chin.
You only get a second of awareness before she's taking you into a hold just as violent as the one she'd trapped Billy in. 
You can't help but giggle at her blatant showing of affection.
She says your name in greeting.
"I hear you kneed Frank in the balls. Well done."
You splutter for an excuse.
"I'm sorry-"
"-Don't be," she interjects, "I wished I'd seen it myself."
You smile, looking over to Frank, who is mid-roll of his eyes.
"That'll cost you later, big boy. Come! Dinner is almost ready." Maria says quickly, turning away and you let out a little chuckle in response to Frank's apologetic face. 
"Billyyyyyyyyy." You hear someone shout, and you watch in horror as a small blur begins racing to your husband.
Your mouth opens, subtly stepping in front of him, ready to catch said blur.
Frank beats you to it, grabbing his son under the arms and picking him up for a second before putting him back down.
"Woah there slugger, take it easy on Uncle Billy, he just had surgery." 
You sigh, moving away from Billy so that he can hug his godson in peace. You catch Maria staring at you. You give her a smile of apology before looking away.
"Frank, I want you to meet my wife," Billy says, turning the younger Frank's body in your direction.
You can instantly see the suspicious look on his face.
You tell him your name, extending your hand politely in greeting.
He takes it, shaking your hand politely, it's the best you can hope for, being a stranger in their home.
"You're not a gold digger are you?" Frank Jr. says suddenly.
It's met with lots of scolding from his parents. You can't help laughing at everyone's shocked expressions.
"Where did you even learn that word?" Frank says, exasperated.
"In school." Younger Frank answers honestly.
Billy straightens, gives you an apologetic look.
"She's not with me for my money, junior, I'm with her cause she's sweet." He wraps a hand around your shoulders, pulling you into his chest.
You can't look at him, leaning in and accepting the comfort.
You meet Lisa next, Frank's older daughter, she's polite, but you can also see the accusation in her eyes.
You figure it's nice, that at least there are people looking out for Billy, though, you almost want to shout his crimes so that you stop being treated so abrasively.
Billy had warned you that the Castles could be protective, that they'd like you once they got to know you.
You'd hoped that were true.
.
When Maria asks how you and Billy met during dinner, you both pause in horror as the answer comes to mind.
You let out a long sigh.
"We met a couple of years ago, at a Christmas party, my boyfriend at the time was working at Anvil." You say with a smile.
Maria nods eagerly in understanding. You can see how bad it looks.
"Alright," you say, finally having enough. Your fork clatters onto your plate and you watch Billy turn his head to you in alarm.
"Cards on the table. No, I'm not with him for his money- and I'm not pregnant either if any of you are thinking it. I like him. I like his stupid face and his stupid laugh and I feel safe around him and I never really had that before." You pause for a second, taking a sip of water before continuing.
"Sure, how we met wasn't the best, and how we got married was even worse, but I like him."
Billy reaches over, taking your hand in his, you glance up at him, your stomach tying into knots as you meet his eyes.
"He's my best friend." You finish.
You feel his hand squeeze yours.
Billy leans forward, his other hand cupping your cheek and hiding your mouths from view as he kisses you softly.
The entire table erupts into groans, mostly from both Franks and you can't help laughing into his kiss.
It lightens the mood though, and there's less tension in the air by the time dinner is finished. 
.
Everyone helps with cleaning up, and you find yourself drying dishes next to Maria while the rest of the family clear the table.
"He's not someone we'd ever thought could settle down." Maria murmurs.
You look up at her curiously.
She sees your confused expression and tries to explain.
"He's always just been so focused on himself, there were a lot of bad things about his childhood, and more in the military, and we just never thought he could be in a spot where he could live with someone. He tends to push people away after a while. Even us."
You look down, letting out a long sigh, wondering what you would do if he ever tried to push you away.
Accept it, you guess. What could you really do if he decided he didn’t want you anymore? Nothing.
“But don’t worry.” She interjects, you look up at her, eyes settling on her wicked scar for a second before you look down at your dish, “He likes you, he really does, maybe you did have a rough start, but I have faith in both of you.”
Your mouth pulls into a smile, you thank her for her kind words.
.
You play Jenga with them next, laughing and tickling Billy’s left side affectionately to distract him while he moves.
He grins, his hand remains remarkably steady while you torment him with your fingers. Everyone jeers, encouraging his loss, booing him when he manages to get the block on top of the tower without toppling it.
Your turn is next and you smile happily as you lean forward to make your move. You feel his hand on the small of your back, rubbing affectionately as you pick your piece. He doesn’t try to shake you or cheat like you did while you pull your piece out. The rest of the Castle family boo you in funny ways, and you have this moment of realisation that this is what family feels like.
When you get your wooden brick seated next to Billy’s, he kisses you on the temple, murmuring a ‘Good job, baby.’ into your ear in a low voice that has your body responding eagerly to him.
There’s a look that passes between you, something warm and electric, the silent guarantee that if you were alone right now, you’d be ripping at each other's clothes.
It’s Frank that drops the tower, after Maria whispers something into his ear quietly, and you smile at the way he looks at her in half betrayal and half adoration as everyone cheers for his loss.
You see it, you understand why these people are so important to him, the humanity inside each Castle is a unique thing, that makes the whole family unit just work so easily.
You’re glad to have met them, and you’re also sad when you have to bid them goodbye at the end of the night.
Maria hugs you both, Frank gives you an almost friendly pat on your shoulder. There’s a bittersweetness to it that you’ve barely felt before, a real family that you can be a part of, a promise to reunite soon that sparks hope inside of you.
You leave, hand in hand with Billy, a little bit happier than you were when you first arrived, feeling like you understood your husband just a little bit more.
.
In the car, he lets out a slow breath, tilting his head back. He’s in pain, you realise.
“My scar is starting to hurt.” he confesses, turning his head to look at you.
Your heart squeezes in your chest. 
“We’ll get you home and get some medicine into you, okay?” You say softly, leaning into him, till your nose rubs affectionately against his.
He nods, eyes drooping as he feels your hand move to cup the healing area of his abdomen over his shirt gently. He leans into you, resting his head into the crook of your neck, your other hand moving up to play with his hair.
You feel him sigh in bliss.
.
You tug your heels off so that you have better balance to support him, encouraging him to lean into you a little so that he’s in a little less pain while you get him up to your apartment.
His pain has worsened by the time you sit him in bed and rummage through your cabinet for his medicine. 
You get it to him first, making sure he finishes the glass of water you gave him before you begin taking his shoes off.
“You don’t have to-” He tries to sit up, “I can-” He grunts in pain when he curls forward too much.
You push him back gently, giving him a kiss to his forehead.
“Let me take care of you, yeah?”
You stroke his cheek with the backs of your fingers while you wait for him to respond.
“Yeah,” he sighs.
You tug his shoes off, and then undo his pants, giggling slightly when he struggles to lift his hips to help you.
You can’t help touching him, feeling over his thick thighs as they’re exposed to you. You kiss his happy trail when you see it, giggling when he groans.
“Tease.” He pouts.
You kiss his pout too.
Only after you strip him down to his boxers and carefully check his scar, do you tuck him into bed, moving to dress down for the night too. 
When you struggle for too long with the zipper, you sit on the edge of the bed beside Billy and ask him for help.
He kisses your exposed back when he gets the zip undone.
When you’re finally in your silky PJs, you slide into bed beside him, noticing that he’s still awake, but blinking slowly.
“Are you still in pain?” You ask, tilting your head to observe him.
“No pain.” He answers, “Groggy.”
You sigh in relief, sliding closer to him, till you’re pressed to his side. Your hand slides into his rough one, and you quietly enjoy the feeling of being next to him until he speaks.
“I’ve never had this.” Billy whispers. You raise your head to look at him, noticing how unfocused his eyes are, staring up at the ceiling, blinking slowly, as if to remind himself that he’s still awake.
“The old me would have never confessed to anyone that I was hurting.” 
He turns his head, glassy eyes focusing on you.
“But you… The way you fight for me makes me want to trust you more and more each time.” He swallows, “It’s scary.”
He raises a hand, cups your cheek and you can’t help leaning into him, closing your eyes in hopes that it puts him at ease, that he doesn’t feel stared at while he opens himself up to you.
“No one has ever taken care of me before. Not like you have. You look at me- and I- I mean something. You know?”
You open your eyes then, staring at him for a long moment, finding that your throat has closed up from your abundance of emotion.
“You mean a lot.” You whisper, your hand raising to cup his.
His eyes are glassy, almost on the brink of tears.
“I didn’t know.”
.
You’re in the kitchen making coffee two days after, scarily deep in thought. 
In the quiet of the morning you think about everything that’s happened. From Dominic dumping you to the despair you felt when your annulment request had been denied. You think about it all, and you think about your mother, whose call you had ignored yesterday after walking out of her house when you found out Billy was sick. 
You didn’t know how to approach her, or what you would say when she asked you the question she’d asked before.
Before you can think yourself into a downward spiral, an arm wraps itself around your waist. His hand is broad, spreading over your tummy and leaving warm tingles behind, his touch so comforting that you can’t help but smile and lean into him a little.
“Good morning, Mrs. Russo.” He grumbles softly, letting you know exactly what he thought of waking up alone in bed.
“What can I help you with, Mister Russo?” You tease, smiling as you both sway together.
There’s a moment of silence, filled only with the sounds of your shared breaths as you enjoy the presence of each other.
“I would like you to come back to bed. It’s a Saturday and you haven’t cuddled me for nearly long enough.”
You grin, rolling your eyes.
“Yeah? And what do I get if I come back to bed with you right now?”
He hums, nose pressing against your ear, one hand on your stomach and the other rising up to cup your jaw securely.
“I can think of many imaginative ways to thank you.” He murmurs, the heat of his breath tickling your ear gently.
It’s something you could never even think to dream of.
.
.
.
A/N: Sorry I've been so inactive... bad things have happened, just popping in to post this cause I don't want it to sit in my drafts for any longer.
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queer-reader-07 · 2 months
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a love letter to trans romance
because i can't be normal about media and i'm making it y'all's problems
hi hello and welcome to my mildly unhinged ramblings about love and gender. this post comes to you in three sections, enjoy <3
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t4t romance novels made me believe in love again
the first romance book i ever read was The Feeling of Falling in Love by Mason Deaver. TFOFIL is a t4t (trans for trans) romance that follows a teenage trans boy, Neil Kearney, and a figuring-out-their-gender teen, Wyatt Fowler, as they get themselves wrapped up in peak YA romcom shenaniganary and eventually fall in love. cute, right? just a fun little romcom, not much more to it?
yeah well that's what i thought going in, but coming out of that book i was in tears. tears because i'd never read a story about trans love before. tears because at that point in my life i'd never allowed myself to fully claim the word "trans." tears because Wyatt made me feel so seen and so real.
there's this one scene where Wyatt is talking to Neil and they describe themself as being the kind of person who sometimes wants to wear makeup and dresses, but other times they like their body hair and scruffy beard. and i just remember nodding along and then absolutely melting because Neil takes it in stride, he comforts Wyatt and let's them know that they don't need to have it figured out just yet. Neil makes it clear that he's there, and that Wyatt doesn't need to come out to anyone unless they're ready.
Mason Deaver has another t4t romance, Okay, Cupid. and that similarly had me in my feels because there is something so special about finding people who embrace you for all that you are.
every t4t romance I've read has one thing in common, the fact that the love interests do not love each despite the other's transness. their transness is not an obstacle to love or to attraction or to adoration, it is an object of it. their transness is something to be admired and to be loved and to be cared for. it is not something the other has to "get over."
reading The Feeling of Falling in Love was the first time i ever thought to myself "maybe, just maybe, i can call myself trans and still be loved." because up until that point i hadn't let myself accept that i was some flavor of trans. up until that point i'd said "not cis" without ever saying trans because i was so scared my being trans would make me unlovable. t4t romance books showed me how wrong i was. they showed me that my ability to be loved was not dependent on my girlhood.
ha you thought i could write something this long on tumblr and NOT mention good omens? think again bestie
i have held a trans reading of crowley since i read the book and the show only solidified it for me. crowley canonically plays with gender.
he's dressed femme during the crucifixion scene, his modern look is a mix of men's and women's pieces, his hair is a Whole Thing in and of itself. i could go on but i digress.
but it's not just the way he plays with gender that informs my trans reading of him. it's also how his character arc can very easily be read as an allegory for transness.
an angel who falls (a girl who isn't a girl anymore)
a fallen angel turned demon (a girl who is a boy now)
a demon who isn't really a demon anymore (a used to be girl, a thought to be boy, is now nonbinary)
girl = angel and boy = demon is entirely arbitrary in this please don't read into it
now, you may be thinking "A how in god's name does this apply to trans romance?" to which i say, aziraphale falls in love with every version of crowley. aziraphale beams heart eyes at angel!crowley before the beginning and loves crowley as a demon for millennia and is so deeply and unabashedly in love with crowley in his not-quite-demon form of s2.
aziraphale loves all the versions of crowley because crowley's angel or demon-ness (gender) is not the reason aziraphale loves crowley. aziraphale doesn't love crowley because he's a demon or because he used to be an angel, aziraphale loves crowley because it's crowley. crowley in whatever clothes he chooses to where, crowley with whatever hairstyle he's fancying at the moment, crowley as he inhabits the shades of grey just a little more.
to me, that is so easy to read as a trans love story. you could argue it's t4t depending on how you read aziraphale, but to me, it's at the very least a love story between a mostly-demon who gets down to some gender fuckery and an angel who loves him very much.
fuck it let's talk about fanfiction
i don't think i could make this post without mentioning @ineffabildaddy's fic I'm Beginning to See the Light.
i have a complicated relationship with my body. i don't plan to ever medically transition because i don't want to make any permanent changes to my body. but there are days where all i want is to have a flat chest and hips that are flush with the rest of my body but instead i'm stuck with tits and an hourglass figure cis people always seem to focus on.
i don't hate my body, but the idea that anyone could look at it and not just see A Woman is beyond me. i walk through life being perceived as a very feminine woman even on the days that i feel the most androgynous. the idea that a lover could look at my body and still see me for who i am feels like a dream that could never happen.
and IBTSTL slapped me (lovingly) across the face with the message that, actually, i can be loved as my whole self and that there are people out there who don't look at me and see A Woman and those people don't love me any less. IBTSTL made me feel safe in my trans body because it said "you are worthy of love and adoration because your transness is not something to get past it is something to admire. it is something to love."
--
i think the point i'm trying to make here is this: trans love stories are so special to me. they've been so vital in my own journey to love and accept myself. they're the reason i can imagine myself maybe having romantic love in the future.
representation matters, it can quite literally change your life.
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Hey y'all welcome back to the hit show
'You MFers Be Racist!'
I'm your host, Roman and on today's show we're gonna be talking about how Miguel, a Latino man looks... Latino.
*audience gasps*
Now audience, what if I told you there's literally people mad they made Miguel darker in ATSV 😭😭
They're saying it's racist because 'if a black character got turned white-'
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Like they ain't even change his ethnicity. Just the fact that he's darker makes them angry.
Same hair color same eye color but he's like four shades darker
Oh my god the creators are so evil for making a *checks notes* brownskin Latino man
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Someone said they prefer Miguel's ATSV design because of the brownskin Latino rep
- and they got called an Anti-White Racist (me and Hobie cackling in the next room) and then anon tried to explain how ethnicities and races in Mexico work
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Y'all do not understand how pervasive racism is in the Spider-man community.
It goes to show how so many 'allies' work and cheer for black solidarity UNTIL black or brown people do something they can't relate to.
Oh, Hobie might wanna date black girls to bond over the shares experiences of racism and anti-blackness? NO THAT'S RACIST how dare he hold parts of his blackness so dear that he wants to be able to share it to his partner with complete understanding? Race shouldn't matter at all to him!! And if it does he's a racist and so are you!!!!!!! You holding your culture dear is not allowed.
For the racists in the fandom, It's racist and upsetting to imply that POC might have a stronger connection to a black character than them.
Oh, brown Latinos are happy that Miguel is brown skin rep now? NO THAT'S RACIST how dare you change the characters skin color by four shades darker even if he's still the same ethnicity and nationality.
How dare you give rep to a largest part of the demographic he's always been apart of
Y'all are the mfers that gave Zendaya - a mixed race self-described Black woman - a hard time.
Yeah mfer I ain't forget that shit!!!!!
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Back when casting Zendaya as MJ was seen as racist and 'race switching' and 'what if they made Miles white that wouldn't be okay so this shouldn't be okay either'
even though there's already a white Spider-man but no black canon spiderman love interest despite the character being around for over half a fucking century.
Because even though Zendaya shares Caucasian ancestory like Mary-Jane has, Zendaya is very clearly a person of color, and since she doesn't look white, that's not enough.
(And don't even get me STARTED on the shit she got for actually dating Tom. Or people who say they want his Black Cat to be white so he can 'get back to' yt women)
Sure, Miguel is mixed - sharing white ancestory with his father. But he's clearly a person of color now, and since he doesn't look white anymore, that's not enough for y'all.
The racism is wild. It's wild and clear.
And that's all from me folks! See you next time on 'Y'all MFers be Racist!!'
Maybe next time we can talk about how Jessica Drew wasn't that much in the wrong. And how she was way less in the wrong than Peter B. And how y'all put responsibility on Black women while also giving a pass to white male incompetency in the same breath.
Tune in next time because trust me these racists will strike again and so will I 😭😭🧐🧐
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ingravinoveritas · 26 days
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feliciafancybottom replied to your post "It never ceases to amaze me that despite…"
What I don't get is that since they are both such outspoken LGBTQI+ allies, why people would think they'd spend all these years essentially making a joke out out of it. Like, "Yeah we're allies, unless you're talking bisexual polyamory. That's the one exception. In that case we're going to take the piss out of it for 5 years for absolutely no reason! It's what the fans would want" How does that make sense? It's as if it's alright for them to be allies as long as they're only paying lip service. The minute it seems as though they may actually be part of the community themselves, well that's a bit "icky".
@feliciafancybottom Exactly this. What has been noticeable to me is that Michael and David have been doing this for the past five years, but apart from a small group of us, no one seemed to take notice until Georgia and Anna got on board. Like suddenly there was "permission" to talk about shipping Michael and David because Georgia and AL were calling each other "wife," and the thought of two young, blonde women flirting with each other was immediately viewed as more acceptable than two middle-aged men.
Yet despite this, there is still a reluctance--a sense of disgust, even--at the thought of Michael and David actually being in love/having anything other than a platonic relationship. But as you said, this has been going on for five years, and there is no reason for Michael and David to keep doing this just to show what big LGBTQ+ allies they are. It's also long past the point where any of this would make sense as fan service or something being done solely to promote a project.
Taking all of this together, I am downright baffled at people repeatedly stopping short of realizing Michael and David might also be part of the community, and even reviling them for it. I'm not sure what it says about the fandom for a show where the main characters exist outside of preconceived boxes related to gender and sexuality if the worst thing Michael and David can do is fall in love with each other, but I do know that I don't like it...
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janichroma · 3 months
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🎉Q/A Answers!🎉🎉
There's a lot to parse here! Warning that there are some spoilers of current content in here! So please tread carefully!
Q1.) I'm very curious about Death Wings. Do all of them exist in a similar state to Robo-Ren, where their true bodies are asleep and they pilot a mechanical suit, or is there something that differentiates them?
Ren is an exception. He's the only one who pilots a separate body. The others are in their own!
Q2.) Which Rejuv characters would be most likely to start a podcast together?
Adam and Valarie probably have a lot of deep 3 am conversations so with a little help from Saki, those two would def make a podcast. Other highlights are Saki+Erick and maybe Texen by himself because he just talks about how women are objects or something i dunno.
Q3.) Are you absolutely sure this is a good idea? Are you being held hostage?
I deadass thought i was gonna get 10-20 questions at most..... So yeah its a good idea.
Q4.) So, half servants. They’ve been so confusing to me. Until 13.5 I was just under the assumption servants were just infertile lol. So, do half servants like…. Inherit any powers or anything from their servant parent? Like, the ability to teleport and things like that.
Servants cannot reproduce when they're first created/in their generic form, but when they transform into their own person they gain a soul and they are then able to reproduce because they're just like any other person. It's just that their origins are different. Servants can still use their magic, but their children cannot. Although, I bet their children -do- inherit some traits from their Servant parent. Probably like just having above average strength/speed etc. That's not universal, though.
Q5.) How come Tesla doesn't let Amber bring us to the villa after the gym battle now?
Well... When two people love each other very much...
Q6.) Do the executives of Team Xen and most importantly Ren have the green gem somewhere on their body that marks them as members of Team Xen?
I wonder...
Q7.) I know in the past, you said that you haven't seen any correct guesses as to the identity of Madame X. Has that changed since the release of 13.5?
Pretty close, but no cigar.
Q8.) would crescent like yuri/gl
I banish you to the hungry worm dimension.
Q9.) i know that some characters, namely tesla (and maybe jolene?) call themselves "honorary" members of the elite 8. is there any specific reason for that? also can roboren run doom this is important.
There's no specific reason other than it soundin' fancy. Roboren can run tetris so maybe!
Q10.) What are the perks/ benefits of joining Team Xen? ( asking for a friend )
Amazing health care, and amazing investments in your 401k.
Q11.) I wanted to ask, which character has, for you, the most chance to surprise us in future updates? Be it badly or greatly.
i can't answer this because it gives too much implicit information!!! Sorry!!
Q12.) what pokemon teams (or just ace pokemon) would characters you don’t ever battle have? for example, volta, eizen, martin, rune, eden, etc? will we ever fight any of them?
I don't want to answer this either because we will probably have an opportunity to fight -most- of these people here, but for Rune it's already established to be Rapidash (Ace), and Eden would probably have a Blissey somewhere.
Q13.) How close of friends are Amber and Crawli? I wanted to ask since they're both Gym Leaders of Terajuma and around the same age, especially when Tesla and Amber moved to Telia after the incident.
They're not too close. They know of each other, and have spoken, but it's mostly a "friendly landlord" kind of relationship. They only talk when it's necessary... Not that Crawli is a landlord, or has any bearing on Teila.
Q14.) Hihi, what are somethings that have changed from version v12 (and also v13) that you really like/are proud of? And are there things you miss from previous versions, but you had to get rid of for any reasons? (I'm personally absolutely in love with the redone Terajuma stuff and especially Crawli, and also the redone Ryland scenes but that's because I'm biased.)
Terajuma 100%. I LOVE Terajuma now. I used to really despise it, evidently. But I think it's so fun and has a lot of nice moments. Valor Mountain still sucks, though. I have a huge urge to simplify that place, but then i'd have to redo a certain scene later and i dont wanna bc it's already perfect. Suffering from success... As for things I miss from previous versions... I can't think of any right now because I love where we're at rn so I guess I don't miss anything? There are certain scenes like Melia with her long hair flowing, but outside of small instances like that, nah!
Q15.) If in the nightmare school "Jean" was able to manifest flora's explosives from the dreams of GDC's citizens... Where could he have manifested A Gun from??
Probably the police station, tbh.
Q16.) What's your personal favorite part of the game thus far?
Honestly Chapter 2 -> to the end of Terajuma is so much fun to me. Not that the other chapters aren't, but that part is comfy. I also love Renegade Route chapter 0.
Q17.) Now if I'm remembering correctly, you mentioned that Venam was supposed to be just a side character at first. What made you decide to change her role into such a major one? Also how did the Melia/Venam come about?
Yeah so, Beth was actually in Venam's spot if you can believe that. Yes, the same one that sells Moo-Moo Milk. We already had a prominent blonde character and Beth wasn't boring or anything, she just didn't add a fun dynamic with Melia. Although back then the formula was more rebornified. Meaning characters rarely traveled together and they kind of just showed up when they needed to. Now characters are constantly always traveling with you and stuff. Not that the old format is bad, it's just a different take. I brought Venam back because she's Melia's best friend and it felt real weird that she was not involved -at all- compared to her and Ren. Their relationship came about because.. Well, I kinda just knew. Venam was always a lesbian in my head, and Melia is def the character that would love anyone if they gave her the chance to love them. It just felt right?
Q18.) 1) When was Eizen conceptualized? 2) What is one funny story about developing v13.5 that you can share? 3) Were there any pieces of media you took inspiration from while writing Renegade(mainly Central Tower)? 4) Do you have any plans of making more games after Rejuv?
Yall are cheating with the multiple parts!! Anyway, Eizen was conceptualized sometime in v13's development, but he... she.. they... were just a concept at the point. (stick a pin in that) 2.) A funny story? Hm... I honestly can't remember anything rn. Probably just some bug that caused us pain and it was super simple to fix. 3.) To be honest, I didn't take any real inspiration for Renegade. I actually went into doing that route without knowing exactly what I wanted from it. But the pieces sorta fell into place and im in love with it lol. M2 was always going to be a character in the game, it's just that she was never named M2 and was more tragic than unhinged. M2's personality was altered slightly because I wanted Renegade to have SOME sort of a balance, and a partner in crime (sorta) felt appropo. 4.) Yes, I have original games in the works AND plans for at LEAST 1 more fangame after this. I'd like to start from scratch with all the knowledge I have now. Though, it wouldnt be nowhere near as long as Rejuv. I'm talking like 4-5 releases. lol.
Q19.) Wanted to ask how renegade!MC perceives Clear/Kieran, the 3 choices we have to respond to Clear asking us to go see Clear all seemed cold towards her. I guess they aren't a potential new friend group?
They are a means to an end. The MC is not close with Clear or Kieran at all. They barely even talk outside of the instances we've already seen. Maybe that'll change?
Q20.) This has been a matter of contention between some friends of mine and I. How old is Odessa? I'd assumed she was below 18 as she's not taken the throne so she might not be an adult and her dad's in charge until that happens, but they think she's an adult. For something less serious, who in Rejuv's most likely to start a ponzi scheme, and who's most likely to buy in.
Odessa is likely to be around 25-ish. She's a legal adult, and is in line to be Queen of Kristiline, but their family line already holds so little influence and power that Aquis just makes her a figurehead and manages things on his own. Kind of a Cinderella of situation? More similar but not 1:1. To be honest? I figure Aquis hopes Kailani to return one day and assume her duties because he likes her more (Even if he abused her the same way he did Odessa.) As for the ponzi scheme... I feel like Thomas Jr would make one and Texen would fall for it.
Q21.) Who is the hardest character to write consistently?
Honestly? Melia. She's given me the most trouble despite her being so prominent. Im good at it now I think, but before I never knew how to write her because anything I did came with criticism lol, and still does, but now I don't really give a shit. Amber's a close second.
Q22.) When Crescent fell down the cliff, did she get the interceptor contract then was asked to become a storm chaser? The events seemed to have happened close to each other. Curious since the hags serve Variya, so only 1 of the 2 parties could've asked her both, but that wasn't the case.
Yes it was shortly after she fell. To be clear, the sparkle the protags saw was the sparkling of water from the moonlight above. So they knew it was "safe" to push Crescent. She could have died but she had a chance to survive a situation where the alternative meant certain death.
Q23.) Will the Elite 8 even be able to be battled on Renegade? I imagine Karrina would replace Karen if Karen dies on Paragon, and Karrina doesn’t get pushed, but she eats the Deletos on Renegade if you don’t push her in Castle Zygara, and it made me wonder.
The members of the Elite 8 may be battleable, but not in an official league format. That's all I'll say on that.
Q24.) I'm still really curious about emma, things that come up in my mind a lot is the part where she looks to be used by variya to speak to melia during the part where amanda knocks her out, and during pearl route when we see the note signed by someone with the same name- emma. because of this, I've been pretty curious about this disguise thing the space hags gave melia. did they- or variya gave them orders to- pull the appearance from the deceased emma? does this mean ... they're the same person?
The name part is merely a coincidence and acts as foreshadowing. Melia reads the note and is like "Emma...?" and wonders if she would share the same fate as the ones written on the notes, and then lo and behold she has the same condition.
Q25.) This question is regarding Renegade route: Do the 6 years that M2 and our chosen host were lost in that alternate world match up with a version release that is outdated, or is an in-universe timer that we shouldn't overthink that much?
Honestly, that wasnt the reason for 6 years but now I wish it was that's rad as hell. But no the 6 years isn't even 6 years. It's an unspecified amount of time that passes that she perceives as 6. They both couldve been down there for a million years and they wouldnt know. The area they're in is similar to the chasm where it wears down your mind after long exposure. Maybe that's how Melia could take such a bad turn in life. The protags are always optimistic to escape though so they are able to hold onto their mind.
Q26.) #1 spector fan here asking questions about him since he probably won't get much spotlight outside of one quest... what was his life like before taking on the reserve leader role (other than what we already know, like where he lived,) and what are his interests outside of the paranormal, if any? thanks for the opportunity! love this game a lot :^)
Spector is a history buff and loves to do Goth Gf things like take strolls in graveyards at 3 am 🥰🥰. Probably spent most of his time in the District of Hope. He also likes exploring ruins and abandoned buildings. Not limited to Aevium tbh.
Q27.) I know Eizen seems to be a strictly side quest character, but have K/C or the hags ever tried contacting him for recruitment? His research seems too valuable to go unused for them.
Eizen has absolutely no interest in either of those groups. If they even tried to do anything he'd noclip out of the room and fall out of bounds and then die half life 1 style.
Q28.) :3c what are some characters that are trans if i may ask?
Ryland - FTM Party Girl - MTF Alain - NB Aero - NB V - Genderfluid Eden - Genderfluid
Q29.) would angie still possess alice in renegade? :0 super curious about it hihihi
Whatever happened passively in Paragon (Meaning Cera being abandoned, Alice getting possessed), STILL HAPPENS IN RENEGADE, we just don't see it because the trail of events that led to us seeing them in Paragon do not happen. So... in Renegade, that means Alice is still...
Q30.) How did the aftermath scene from defeating the hags on renegade come to be? I'm very curious
i assume you mean the Tera Raid parody? Well, it came up on my playlist on the train and I was feeling chaotic. what if in rejuv but deadly ?
Q31.) who's the shortest character (excluding the younger kids >>)
Probably either Cera, tbh. She's a short lil one. I don't have canon heights for characters outside like an estimation. But in my head Cera tiny.
Q32.) Hello! I would like to ask, Did the interceptor, before the SS Oceana be attacked, have fake memories of a life alongside Nancy? Since Crescent wanted the MC to have a normal life, I always wondered If she created new memories to make this easier And if I can ask another question. What is/was the criteria to someone see the MC appearance correctly? Huey and Lavender saw two different ones, while Aelita saw the correct one(in my case she saw Alain when asked)
Crescent did not create memories for the player. They just started acting weirdly and stopped talking to her. They then started to behave the same way you, the player, does. Believing that what is happening is real and has always been real (Because this is all the information you have right now), so Crescent takes this opportunity to try and let go by giving you a better (but fake!) life. It's why she sorta distances herself a bit (but not too much) so that you could integrate yourself into that delusion. We love being neuro <3.
The criteria is pretty ambiguous intentionally, but for me it has to do with personality and connection. Aelita always sees who you truly are because shes so close with the player + she has envoy shenanigans going on. If you would get along with Alain the most, the player would show themselves as alain etc.
Q33.) Any disclosable reasons why the rift dex now only has 2 remaining entries instead of 3 like in v13?
It's probably just a discrepancy that happened due to shifting over code bases. The number of slots left is not indicative of anything.
Q34.) hello jan!! hope you’re doing well :D is there any more information or random various facts about the androids (clear/kieran/eden) that can be said that ISN’T spoilers? it’s ok if not! i’ve just been curious about them all lately, especially in regards to how eden’s powers with emotional manipulation work.
Nothing too interesting about Clear or Kieran that isn't spoilers and isnt known already, but as for Eden... Eden was eccentric and had a personality thats real close to prince peasley from superstar saga LOL. I feel like Eden would have a catch phrase like "Mon Cherie", and flip their iridiscent hair in mockery. Eden's manipulation was very devastating. You would feel an immeasurable amount of joy when inflicted that you would give over any information because youre... happy to! But it was also very deadly. If exposed to it for too long you become way too happy to the point where you lose the ability to function normally. You'd fall into a happy-apathetic state and collapse and just lay where you fell until you starved or died in some other way. Because you're happy to! Everything in moderation, guys.
Q35.) Hi jan!!! quick question — why do you hate me why did the renegade route do that /real/ question though…. My buddy found some like… older stuff about Eizen in v13’s files. Something about a girl named Ærika?? (Idk if thats even connected but whatever) How did Eizen come to be? What was the process?
Hi remember the pin I stuck earlier? Ok we're unpinning that now. So, Eizen was originally a woman (So happy for his transition), And her name was Ærika. But we already had so many girls in the game and I wanted to create more male characters so then Eizen was born. I'm glad for it too because Eizen is way more interesting than Ærika. Eizen/Ærika came to be when [redacted]. I can't explain his origins quite yet, sorry! But one day you Will Realize.
Q36.) Hi Jan, thanks for the amazing game! In Alamissa, before we get yeeted into the past by Kieran, when Ren gives us sylveon and, um, Nancy’s remains, he mentions that he has stayed (even after breaking off with crescent) with xen for an important reason… but won’t specify. Later, he says the reason is because he wants to help nastasia. But the alamissa convo happened before ren met Anastasia (baby version). Did ren want to help nastasia before he met her past version and learned that she was…
Ren didn't know who she was at that point, but Ren has seen Nastasia in vulnerable points (that we havent seen... yet?). She has discussed with him that shes looking for someone prior to Alamissa, but she was very vague about it, and still is, but she's opened up a lot to Ren over time.
Q37.) This is probably a weirder question but will all of the main leaders, even the ones we battle outside of their gym duties have custom moves? If not, would it be safe to assume the main leaders use the moves of their reserves?
All leaders have custom moves. Reserves use the move the main leader does! They have TM's for these, but they aren't allowed to give them out to winners. At least, at the moment!
Q38.) what was your favorite part of 13.5's development?
Making Renegade Route lmfao. It was so much funnnnnnn. I cant wait for the rest.
Q39.) what’s the EoN experience like for someone going through it? If that’s too spoilery, what was the most surprising part of people’s reactions to .karma content?
You're getting scrubbed. It looks painful, but it's painless... and seamless! You literally cannot process what is going on. As for most surprising, I was surprised people loved M2 so much. I mean, I had a feeling people would like her, but she really took off and that makes me happy bc shes so fun to write.
Q40.) Hi Jan! My question is this: Will Melia and Venam get back together somewhat in the future? Or will they just stay friends? (Paragon route)
Who knows...
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An extra question im throwing in here because ive seen a lot of talk around this character.
Q1X.) What inspired M2? M2 was conceptualized to be more of a tragic character, but I felt like Renegade needed some balancing out mood wise, or else it was too much of a drag. M2 was inspired by an insecurity of mine, actually, or I guess less so an insecurity and more of a question a lot of us ask ourselves. What if? What if I did this differently? What if I was born elsewhere? How different would I be? When Covid first started running about and I thought the fate of our lives was about to be cut short potentially, I started thinking about how I lived my life and how much I missed out on certain things. M2 is that. She gets a second chance at life and decides she wants to be everything but Melia because she's already lived that life and it turned out poorly. Hence the name M2. The second version of herself.
A song that inspired me is Immaterial by Sophie (Rest in peace)
2:03 is important
youtube
Now that I have a second chance at life, "I'll be anyone, anything, any shape." I mentioned before that your archetype powers manifests as your deep inner desire, and since M2 wants to be everything she couldn't be, it turns into her creating alternative selves through clones made of light. Another point of inspiration for her forms is actually Barbie of all things. Not the movie, although the movie takes advantage of the same principle, that Barbie can be anything. A doctor, a lawyer, life guard, a government official etc. M2 is everything always and forever, and she's also nothing at all. Which one is the real M2?
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Text
When They Get Jealous
Summary: What happens when they someone flirting with you and they get jealous? Characters: Luther Hargreeves, Diego Hargreeves & Lila Pitts, Allison Hargreeves, Klaus Hargreeves, Five Hargreeves, Ben Hargreeves, Viktor Hargreeves, Marcus Hargreeves, Sparrow! Ben Hargreeves, Fei Hargreeves, Sloane Hargreeves, Jayme Hargreeves Tw: Violence, Emotional Manipulation, Su!c!dal indications
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Luther Hargreeves
Kind of insecure
He's also angry and crushes whatever he's holding in his hands
He's surprised when looking down at the crushed item
Then he becomes annoyed
He'll go to the bathroom to clean up and you'll quickly follow him
"Are you okay?"
He's surprised by your presence and the fact that you followed him
He'll then feel bad about his feelings before
You would never hurt him and he knows that, so why would he even feel that way? You've never done anything to justify that feeling
"Um... Nothing, I accidently- uh, crushed this thing- You know... Strength issues..."
You'll help him clean up/patch up and it makes Luther guilty and he momentarily forgets about the previous feeling... At least until next time
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Deigo Hargreeves & Lila Pitts
What a duo
Lila definitely filled Diego's head with delusions and will convince him to do something stupid [Like kill the person flirting w/ you] while she hides the body
Lila takes it better, but inside she's more pissed than Diego
Diego is mad at you and won't talk to you. You'll have to profusely apologize and prove to him you care, otherwise he won't speak to you. Trust, he can hold a grudge
Lila, on the other hand, is very extroverted and will go over to where you are and talk to the person who was flirting with you
There's is definitely tension in the air, even though it doesn't show on her face
She's all smiles and happy, but it doesn't show in her eyes
Deigo is mad, but Lila sees it as an opportunity to manipulate you [She also wants a reason to kill somone]
You try and talk back and she'll bring up how sad it makes them when people flirt with you and she'll emotionally manipulate into feeling bad
You didn't like the person but... maybe she's right? I mean- you didn't exactly tell the person no or that you were taken, but you had asked them to stop.... Was that enough?
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Allison Hargreeves
Oh, no no no nononononono
She is NOT letting that happen
The person who's flirting with you must have a death wish
She doesn't want to use her powers, but...
Well, she really has to fight the urge
She looks very sweet and kind, so she can just come into the conversation and play nice girl
She'll drag you off, talking about needing your help or something, while apologizing for taking you away [But she doesn't really mean it]
You won't even notice she's mad until you're alone
She'll accuse you of cheating or trying to leave her
You're taken by surprise, but don't even try and fight her, because she's in a very low/depressive state, so she'd be easy to push into doing something drastic
So, you'll have to wait until she feels better to confront her
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Klaus Hargreeves
They already assume you don't love them, so this just fills this delusion they have
It really bums them out and they get super depressed
They get extra clingy whenever they get you alone
They're usually pretty clingy, so you don't think about it to much
Until, they start whining about the guy at the bar
They'll ask you if you like them [Flirter] more than them [Klaus]
You'll tell them no, but they don't believe you
They'll emotion manipulate you saying that you probably hate them and if you ever leave them, they'll kill themselves
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Five Hargreeves
Someone flirting with you? Do they have a death wish??
Not afraid to kill a man or women. He doesn't care
The only issue is he'd never admit his jealousy. You have to confront him and at first he'll deny it, but if you keep pushing he'll get pissed and yell 'You know what- I am jealous! So what!?!'
You're surprised he admitted it, but that's the only time you're getting it
He'll deny saying it and gaslight you into thinking it never happened
He will kill them, he just needs a little time, which he has plenty of
It is bloody, gory and gruesome
No one will find the body, but he'll make sure you know the person is dead and it's all your fault
He'll make sure you never do it again because he hates this feeling and it bothers the hell out of him
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Ben Hargreeves
He wasn't really having fun at the party, so when seeing someone hit on you, it just made his night worse
He's scared you'll realize that he's not good enough
He hates the icky feeling in his stomach and it only continues to grow
Though it does make the feeling subside when seeing you roll your eyes and push the person out of the way before heading towards him
It makes him giddy and smile; Like a school boy
The fact that you'd chose him over everyone else really fuels his obsession, so be warned
When you get to him, you complain about the person
"Did you see them?"
He'll pretend that he wasn't paying attention and you gasp, before sitting down and ranting about how stupid that person was
He practically has hearts in his eyes and he looks at you like you're the only person in the world, which to him you are
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Viktor Hargreeves
He's annoyed, but he's not going to do anything drastic [Or at least he tries]
He wants to do something, but he doesn't really know what to do, because he's never had like a good relationship
He watches sadden from afar before wallowing in his own self pity
Though, after everything that has happened, he is a little bit more confident it just takes some working up before he can go over to you
He'll debate about it for a few though. Like he'll sit up, but quickly sit back down and do it over again until he finally gathers the courage to approach you
He'll finally approach you, thinking of what he's going to do as he approaches you, but when he finally approaches you he's still lost on what to do
He'll just act and kiss you infront of the person, which takes the flirter by surprise
The flirter will apologize and end up leaving you alone
You're surprised by Viktor's brazen behavior, but it's also kind of a turn on and he'll kiss you again before you can comment on it
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Marcus Hargreeves
He doesn't get 'jealous'
That word isn't even in his dictionary
Well, that was until he saw a guy flirting with you
What is this feeling???
It's an icky feeling that he doesn't like it
He'll put an end to it quickly [Both the flirting and the feeling]
You're kind of taken aback when Marcus comes up to you and pulls you away from the conversation
He would have folded his way into the conversation, but he would have been passive aggressive
You try and ask him what's wrong, but he's quick to deflect the conversation
He'll push the feeling deep down and it'll come up when you both get into a fight
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Sparrow! Ben Hargreeves
He's furious
If he wasn't busy nursing his drink, he probably would have knocked the guy out. Thankfully he's drunk and not sober
Though he can't help the thoughts in his mind... Violent thoughts
The thoughts will become a lot and he has to leave
He's mad at the person, but then he starts thinking and he suddenly becomes mad at you
How come you didn't tell them to back off????
He becomes slightly insecure but he fights that feeling and it becomes overcome with anger
He'll end up leaving without you, because he needs time to be alone and think
Though, this just makes his feelings worse. While he's drunk he's sad and depressed, but when he becomes sober, his emotions quickly turn to anger and he wants to confront you
So, when he sees you again he's anger has already been bubbling up and he blows up
You're taken aback and kind of scared because he's so mad and he's yelling and you can't even decipher what he's talking about
He needs some time to cool off, but he can't be alone, because his feelings will cool off
You'll go to another room while he cools off, so that he knows you're still around, but you're not alone together
He will eventually calm down and apologize for his behavior, but not with words, but like subtle actions, gifts, and such
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Fei Hargreeves
You don't even know she's jealous, because she hides it so well
She's kind of scary looking, so no-one has approached her
She takes her jealousy pretty well and doesn't let it bother her
It just kind of rolls off her back
She's confident and knows who she is and what she wants, so she's not threatened by some nobody trying to hit on you
Though, if she sees you getting uncomfortable, she will step in
Thanks to her looks, they back off rather quickly
It's rather silly to her and she finds the whole thing stupid
She takes it the best and doesn't let it bother her
10/10 best girlfriend <3
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Sloane Hargreeves
She's a sweet girl and doesn't deserve to be sad
She's a hopeless romantic, so when she sees people flirting and being cute, she instantly is like 'Awww' until she realizes it's you
Then she's mad and her mind races with multiple different scenario
What if you leave her?
Oh god, what if you don't love her anymore?
What if you click with them so well that you think they're you're soul mate and you leave he-
She shakes her head, before standing up
She fixes her hair, before putting on her brightest smile and approaching you
She's very beautiful, so they person who was hitting on you will turn and flirt with her too
She'll become annoyed, because they were just hitting on you and now they're hitting on her? Were you not good enough for them???
Who did they think they were?
Instead of being mad that they were flirting with you, she's mad they STOPPED flirting with you to flirt with her
You're incredible, so she's confused why they don't realize that
She calls them on it and you're really flattered, but you have to drag her away, so she doesn't get to carried away
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Jayme Hargreeves
It's more of an annoyance
She doesn't think about it to much
She's probably the only one who WILL come up to you and interrupt your conversation in a rude way
If the flirter is rude to her she'll use her powers and pull you away from them
It all happens so fast, you don't even process it until you're back at the house
"What the hell was that???"
She doesn't even turn to you, but you do here her make a sound of confusion
Your brows frown, and you groan, "Why did you use your powers on that person"
"Why were you flirting with them?" Still she hasn't turned towards you
"I wasn't flirting with them!"
She keeps her cool, making brash accusations, which causes you to get angry and by the end of it she makes it seem like YOU are the crazy one
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cerise-on-top · 4 months
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hello! Can I request the ask aboyt a s/o who likes muscular people, except with Rudy and Ale? My bois need some appreciation! thank you!
Hello! Of course you can! I'm glad people like those two as well, they're lovely characters and deserve all the love in the world! Thank you for the request, I hope this suffices!
Alejandro and Rodolfo with an S/O who Likes Muscular People
Alejandro: It’s actually not as uncommon for people to be into Alejandro and his muscles as one might think. He’s had plenty of people, men and women, come up to him to tell him how attractive and strong he is. He’s always loved that sort of attention, even if it was just superficial and nothing else. So, when he sees you staring at him as he brushes his teeth, something sparks in him. He’s not that young anymore either, but he’s still got it, he knows that, and to know that you think the same makes his heart soar. The moment he notices he’ll come up to you and ask you with a grin why you’re staring at him as much as you do. It’s then that you can either fess up or try to hide your infatuation with his muscles further. Former will have him show off just how strong he is, preferably by picking you up and holding you over his head if he can, all the while giving you kisses and making sure you feel loved. If you decide to not tell him the truth he’ll make it a game. How long can you actually last and not stare at him as he shows off by doing pull ups? He’ll make sure to wear tighter clothing that shows off how muscular he is, he’ll try to make you feel small by carrying things that you likely wouldn’t be able to hold yourself. Anything to make you flustered. It’s just a matter of time until you finally tell him, but until then he’ll have his fun. Once you do confess he’ll take your face in his hands, give you a kiss, and tell you he knew all along.
Rodolfo: While he may not be insecure, it would take him quite some time to understand you’re looking at his muscles. He’s not nearly as muscular as, say, Alejandro, so he is a bit surprised. It flusters him a bit, knowing you’re staring at his arms, legs and chest whenever you can. He’s in the military, so naturally he has to have some muscles, but they’re not as grand as those of other people. So in his case, you can probably reassure him that he, despite not being an Arnold Schwarzenegger, still looks so very good. It would make him a bit sheepish, but you’d get to see him smile. He won’t be as cocky about being muscular as other people, that’s just how his body looks, but since you really like it, he might show off here and there. He’ll let you touch his muscles if you want to and carry the heavy things if you need something to be moved, but he won’t really brag about it too much. He’d much rather show off by holding you close, making you feel safe and sound in his arms. Whether that be through giving you a hug or cuddling you. He loves holding you in general, so if being squeezed lightly by his bicep makes your heart sing, then so be it. While he won’t always try to pick you up, he will sometimes ask you if you want to be carried to bed and cuddled. It’s his way of showing that he loves you so dearly since he normally doesn’t initiate physical contact. You loving his muscles shows him just how much you adore him, not only for his personality, but you also believe every part of him is worth loving and that he’s strong enough to protect. He’s a fan of you liking his muscles, but more so due to romantic reasons.
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