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piastriprincess · 1 month ago

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if you keep it just yours ⸻ charles leclerc x reader .

featuring charles leclerc , writer!reader , fluff , smau . author’s note requested by anon ! i’m sorry it took so long but i loved your request and your kind words , i hope i did it justice ! tried to get this out today in honor of the #chodium . this is my first try at an smau so PLEASE be nice … i’m still not sure i love the way this turned out but nevertheless we persist ! i also had to drop some ancient charles lore in this … rip bawsixteen we still talk about you . anyway please let me know what you think and if i should keep trying smaus … i promise i won’t be upset if you hated it <3 title is from paris by taylor swift (in honor of her owning the masters again !!!)

liked by emmachamberlain, dollyalderton and 27,054 others yourusername it’s official — i’m in my monaco era! paris will always have mon coeur but it’s time for a change of scenery. here’s to good beaches and hopefully better stories 🐚💌

user1 THEEEE modern carrie bradshaw frfr ⤷ user2 No bc I can’t wait to hear her stories about the Monaco dating scene??? user3 romanticizing your life is BACK and yn is leading the charge !! user4 already screaming at how chic this is. give me the essay collection immediately yourbff OMG I need to visit asappppp ♥ liked by author ⤷ yourusername missing you already ! user5 bienvenue à monaco! you will love it here :) user6 main character of her own european romance novel iktr camillecharriere oh i want to be you when i grow up ♥ liked by author user7 This post feels like the opening scene of an HBO show I’ll binge 16000 times…

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to: Y/N L/N [email protected] from: Jean-Claude Ravello [email protected] subject: Bienvenue au Bellevue!

Bonjour mademoiselle L/N,

Welcome to your new home at the Residence Bellevue — we are so happy to have you here! I am sure you will quickly discover that Monaco is a small place, but this building is even smaller. Please, consider yourself part of the family already!

A few quick notes to help you settle in:

Waste and recycling are collected on Tuesdays and Fridays. There are trash chutes on every floor, but the recycling must be taken to the bins by the side entrance.

Wi-Fi information is included in the welcome folder. I know you mentioned you were a writer, so if you should need a stronger signal, the rooftop lounge is a favorite quiet working spot for our residents.

Your neighbors are both longtime Bellevue residents, so if you have any questions about the building that I cannot answer (or you just do not want to ask me!) please feel free to reach out to them. Charles actually grew up in Monaco and knows the city inside and out so if you need any recommendations I am sure he would be happy to help. Sharing both neighbors’ contact information (with permission):

Laura (16A): +377 08 35 19 72

Charles (16C): +377 99 42 67 01

Do not hesitate to contact me with any maintenance concerns or general questions! Wishing you a smooth unpacking. We are delighted to have you join our community.

Welcome home, Jean-Claude Ravello Building Superintendent

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liked by jiatortellini, kikagomes and 31,652 others yourusername from me to you, a new essay on the unique magic of starting over and the way a stranger can start to feel like a story. up now on substack! let me know what you think xx

user8 “balcony boy” WE CHEERED MOTHER IS BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER ⤷ user9 Her writing isn’t just about the men she’s dating… ⤷ user8 okay congrats you read. do you want a medal?? should we throw a party?? should we invite bella hadid?? marlowetatiana Obsessed ! ♥ liked by author user10 saw the notif at brunch and opened substack immediately like sorry guys my parasocial internet bestie needs to tell me about her new crush user11 @ oprah @ reesewitherspoon @ pitbull GET HER A BOOK DEAL STAT! ⤷ user12 girl what is mr. worldwide going to do… user13 “Maybe Balcony Boy and I will never really meet. Maybe we’re destined to almost-know each other indefinitely… But still, there’s something delicious about the romance of the near miss.” WOW!!!! ♥ liked by author yourbff What did I say… I give it a week ⤷ yourusername it’s been ten days actually. this is what growth looks like! take notes! user14 i get her bc balcony boy has me in a chokehold too and i’ve never even seen him

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OUTGOING AUDIO MESSAGE ▶‖ to: bestie • 02:23 •၊၊||၊|။||||။၊|။•

“Okay, so… I know I was supposed to check in after fifteen minutes and I’m really late and now I’m hiding out in the bathroom like I’m in a rom com from the 2000s because… I don’t know, I just — I just need a minute to breathe. [pause] I thought this was just a stupid little crush and I’d go on this date and get over it but he’s… Babe, he’s really sweet. He opened doors for me. He pulled out my chair. He called me chérie. He even laughed at my stupid joke about the bread basket! And he’s so — ugh. He’s so pretty and he smells so good, it’s rude. It’s actually unfair how perfect he is. [long sigh] But that’s not even the thing. Like, it’s not even that he’s cute. Okay, maybe it’s a little bit that he’s cute but — he’s smart. And funny. And curious, and he listens when I talk, like really listens, even if it’s stupid or rambley, and he asked about my writing and actually wanted to hear about it. I don’t want to jinx it or anything, but… yeah. I might be in trouble here. It feels like it could be something, you know? [pause] Okay. I really need to go back before he thinks I climbed out the window. I’ll tell you everything tomorrow. Love you so much.”

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@ yourusername • instagram notifications you have (1) new follow request from @ bawsixteen !

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liked by hunterh, oliviarodrigo, and 28,253 others yourusername life is looking pretty good lately

user15 is that a m-m-man ?!?!?!?! ⤷ user16 better question IS THAT BALCONY BOY ⤷ user17 It literally has to be! She hasn’t written about anyone else user15 okay i’ve gotten over my shock. who the hell is he bc his hand is fine as fuck rachsyme and you look even better! ♥ liked by author yourbff oh so we’re soft launching now… 👀 ♥ liked by author ⤷ yourusername yeahhhhh so i owe you SEVERAL voice memos user18 LOVERGIRL ERA user19 mother is boo’d up… congrats to whoever’s bouncing on it 😭 ⤷ user20 you almost got it sweetie. don’t worry. we’ll wait. bawsixteen Pretty flowers :) ♥ liked by author ⤷ yourusername almost as pretty as the guy who gave them to me :)

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to: All Subscribers [email protected] from: Y/N [email protected] subject: everything i know about falling

Everything I Know About… Falling

So here’s the thing about me and Balcony Boy (and yes, even though we’re actually dating now, I’m still not graduating to using his actual name with you all!) Somewhere in between our first kiss overlooking the harbor and him learning to make me blueberry pancakes just the way I like them, I’ve realized I can’t lie to myself that it’s casual anymore.

And that is completely terrifying.

You know that feeling when you’re reading a really good book and you look up and realize that you’ve been on another planet for hours? Where you’ve forgotten to check your phone, forgotten to be anxious about deadlines, forgotten about every single thing except the story and the words on the page? That’s what being with Balcony Boy feels like. Like nothing matters except existing in that very moment with him.

I’m not used to staying present like that. My mind is like a summer storm, always pulled in a million different directions. I used to think it was a strength of mine: a skill, even. It made me a better writer, a better thinker. But that constant motion was also my shield — from boredom, from failure, from getting too attached to anything. Self-preservation disguised as independence. Emotional distance disguised as something casual.

When Balcony Boy came into my life, yes, I liked him immediately. Six feet of tan, hot, shirtless neighbor. Let’s be real. Who wouldn’t enjoy that view? But somewhere along the way, he stopped being a charming background character in my life and started being the type of steady presence that made me want to slow down. To sit still. To listen. To trust. And that is such a new feeling that I can’t help but be scared.

Here’s the truth: I’ve dated a lot of men who liked the idea of me. Men who wanted to be a muse and then flinched when I spilled my truth onto the page. Men who liked a complicated woman until the complications weren’t cute anymore. Men who wanted me to be emotionally available for them, and who never really listened in return. All of that was okay, because I wasn’t staying still long enough for the pain to be anything more than a glancing blow.

But Balcony Boy doesn’t just like the idea of me. He doesn’t need to be the story — he just wants to make space for mine. He reads my drafts and underlines all his favorite lines. He twirls me around my kitchen when I laugh and he holds me when I cry. He listens. He shows up, quietly and without spectacle. He brings me coffee and croissants when I’ve been writing too long and forget to eat. It sounds crazy, but I'm scared of this because if I lose it, for the first time in a long time, it'll really, really hurt. But Balcony Boy tells me I’m brave when I’m terrified. And for the first time in a long time, he makes me want to believe him.

I used to think love was about dramatic gestures, but maybe this is what love feels like when it’s real. Not the fireworks (although there are plenty of those, too), but the foundation. Not someone catching you when you fall, but someone taking your hand so you don’t have to be scared of the jump in the first place.

So here I am. Jumping, without hesitation. And if the fall kills me, at least I’ll have had the pleasure of doing it with him.

yours, y/n xx

next week: everything i know about long-distance - on dating someone whose job takes them away more than you’d like, and learning to miss someone properly.

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liked by bawsixteen, rachelchinouriri, and 29,311 others yourusername so in love that i might stop breathing, drew a map on your bedroom ceiling

user21 mama… mama a man behind you ⤷ user22 the launch is getting harder and harder user23 starting the investigation into balcony boy’s identity. james bond has nothing on me yourbff Happy looks sooooo good on you babe ♥ liked by author user24 the note OH LET ME KILL MYSELF !!!!!!!!!! hunterh beautiful girl! ♥ liked by author user25 this has gone on long enough WHO IS HE ⤷ user26 She’s allowed to keep it private for as long as she wants! ⤷ user25 "keep it private" blah blah blah consider i’m living vicariously through her and i want to know :) ⤷ user27 that's definitely a ferrari he's driving in slide 3... bawsixteen Belle chérie ♥ liked by author user28 oh i just KNOW balcony boy is sooooooo fine

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REDDIT: TOP POSTS TODAY r/yourusername • crossposted to r/formula1 • 3h ago posted by u/luvleclerc

hear me out… i think i know who balcony boy is!

okay i know this sounds insane but LISTEN. i’ve been reading y/n’s substack for ages and am also a huge fan of formula one. i’m absolutely convinced that balcony boy is charles leclerc.

EVIDENCE so yall don’t call me crazy:

so y/n moved to monaco a few months ago, and posted this photo from her balcony. she’s never said exactly where she lives but you can see the harbor in the background and we know charles lives near there. and this story he posted the other day? like not to be a stalker but tell me that’s not almost exactly the same view. almost like they're neighbors... also the timeline of her moving to monaco almost perfectly matches when charles started posting less on socials!!!

then we get into the balcony boy content, which if you haven’t read… oh my god. y/n’s writing is so beautiful that it doesn’t even make you feel bad about being painfully single. balcony boy literally feels like a romcom hero come to life. she doesn’t drop a ton of personal details about him but here’s what she HAS said:

“Some people flirt with their eyes and their smile. Others, apparently, do it by playing you a piano étude at golden hour, notes drifting on the sea breeze like a love song.” … guess who else FAMOUSLY plays piano????? charles marc hervé perceval leclerc.

balcony boy is genuinely curious about her writing and reads all her essays. this is exactly how charles is in interviews - always engaged and thoughtful with questions.

balcony boy is fine with being written about and isn’t bothered that y/n is somewhat well known. sounds like a person who already knows how it feels to be in the spotlight!!!!

“Dating a man who’s gone every other weekend means learning to say goodbye. But even when he’s on the other side of the world, he never makes me feel like he’s far away.” F1 CALENDAR HELLO…

mentioned that balcony boy grew up near where they live (“knows the streets of this place like the lyrics of his favorite song”). prince of monaco!!!! i rest my case!!!!

one last thing: her most recent posts are totally a soft launch and the guy’s hair in the 1st slide looks EXACTLY like charles's. plus there’s this comment from someone called @ bawsixteen about the flowers like he gave them to her? i checked the account and it’s private with no profile photo, but the display name says CL. cl… sixteen… it CAN’T be a coincidence!!

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TOP COMMENTS u/f1gossipgirl • 3h ago this is the most unhinged thing i’ve ever read but you’ve convinced me ⬆ 3.4K ⬇

u/fromthedeskof • 48m ago NOOOOO PLEASEEE not my favorite microinfluencer i can’t have everyone finding out about her… she’s MY parasocial bestie ⬆ 2.5K ⬇ ⤷ u/albonnation • 11m ago it's too late she has wag allegations :( she’s about to blow up ⬆ 332 ⬇ ⤷ u/everythingyn • 9m ago rip to our cozy lil substack community, she will be missed 💔 ⬆ 597 ⬇

u/BeanbagGreg • 1h ago This subreddit is focused on racing. Stick to discussion of driving please ⬆ 1.7K ⬇ ⤷ u/piastriwdc • 26m ago literally no one asked you to read this… how many times do we have to teach you this lesson old man? ⬆ 4.8K ⬇

u/romanticrealist • 35m ago ok grandma let’s get you to bed ⬆ 992 ⬇ ⤷ u/sallyrooneyluvbot • 6m ago Literally like as if she would ever date an athlete?? Be so fr ⬆ 81 ⬇ ⤷ u/landoleclerc • 2m ago um have you SEEN charles leclerc? don’t you ever speak on my goat like that ⬆ 133 ⬇

u/charlesdefender • 2h ago wait she’s sooooo pretty what’s her instagram ⬆ 689 ⬇

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@ yourusername • instagram notifications you have (8,692) new follow requests from @ leclercwdc, @ charloslover, @ f1ella and others !

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liked by charles_leclerc, bawsixteen, and 95,214 others yourusername privacy sign on the door… taking balcony boy offline for now xx

charles_leclerc Je t’aime ♥ liked by author

comments have been limited on this post

#f1 #f1 x reader #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc fluff #f1 imagine #charles leclerc smau #f1 smau #charles leclerc #f1 driver x reader #f1 driver x you #charles leclerc x you #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 imagine #❀ my work .

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teambyler · 7 months ago

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My video "A LAWYER'S EVIDENCE that Mike and Will become a romantic pair in Stranger Things" is out!

youtube

Many of you have followed me ( @teambyler ) or read my essays analyzing Byler (I've linked some of the most-shared ones below). I am actually also a LAWYER who has a YouTube channel called RONALD OFF THE RECORD, and I just released my big video on Byler! (I also have another YouTube channel with 45K subscribers that I mention in the video)

I'm prepared to put my professional reputation as a lawyer on the line to comment on a piece of science fiction, because goddammit this is important to me! It is not "delusional" to think Will and Mike will become a couple, and there is nothing wrong with you if want it to happen! This is a video essay I've been planning for at least SIX MONTHS, and I put a lot of work into it. Please share, and please leave comments. Enjoy! =D

0:00 Why this video 1:38 Hate for Byler on the internet 10:16 Case for Mileven 15:21 Case for Byler: Starting premises 17:56 If Will were a girl… 25:30 The evidence! 29:05 EXHIBIT A: The Snow Ball 31:34 B: Mike's reactions to El and Will being upset 34:21 C: Season 3 ending montage 39:16 D: Airport reunion 47:51 E: Rink-O-Mania argument 51:28 F: Heteronormativity, audience expectations 58:25 G: Throwing away the letter 59:55 H: 2nd heart-to-heart scene 1:05:43 I: Mike can't say he loves El 1:13:27 J: Platonic reunion 1:15:12 K: Will's role convincing Mike to say "I love you" 1:20:08 L: Effect of the "love confession" on El 1:39:54 M: The Painting Lie 1:43:22 Honorable mentions 1:45:27 Non-diegetic evidence 2:01:23 Actor statements 2:07:01 Season 5 information 2:10:34 NOT how you write an unrequited love story 2:16:07 Why Byler SHOULD happen (queerbaiting, etc.) 2:28:21 A more powerful story 2:35:45 A personal note

I'm now making this my new pinned post, so I'll list a few of my posts here for people to check out.

ADDITIONS: -28:00 On "We should normalize same-sex friends being affectionate, they don't have to be gay," I should have been clearer. HOMOPHOBIA is the reason for that stigma. Straight friends feeling like they can be affectionate in our society HAS to include normalizing LGBT+ people. -1:16:55 I should've said this more clearly: Will reminded Mike that who HE is, HIS unique qualities, make him worthy of love and make El love him, not dumb luck. And Will of course could convey that because Will loves the actual nerd MIke and everything he is. -1:17:06 Mike making El "not feel like a mistake" doesn't fit El, because she says that Mike looks at her "like I'm a monster, too". Nor did she "push you away because she was afraid of losing you". That's Will, not El. Mike felt love because Will was describing himself. -1:52:36 I forgot to mention that, in the original Nina opera, Nina's lover is ALIVE and DOES return. The Duffers changed the story so that Nina's lover does NOT return, to further suggest Mike won't return! -2:35:22 I'm kicking myself for not being more specific about Mike and Will being heroes in more than one way: I think the theme of bullying from s1 will return, with Will (and also Mike) having to face bullying for being boyfriends in Hawkins.

Some other @teambyler posts:

Mike was saying "I love you" to Will

Questions to ask if ever you have Byler doubt

How the Duffers have set Will up to have a happy ending in Season 5

The most heartbreaking way Byler can culminate (and how I predict it will) (I know this is less likely than an "escape from Camazotz" possession scenario, but I still want this to happen =D )

How the Duffers likely will make the general audience AWARE of Byler and CHEER for Byler

-teambyler

#byler #teambyler #video #lawyer's evidence #stranger things #st5 speculation #byler theory #byler analysis #Youtube

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polyamorousmood · 18 days ago

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Okay, apparently some people don't know this and that's not gonna do on my blog. So as we used to say on this hellsite,

sit down and shut up because I'm about to learn you a thing

This:

is the ORIGINAL polyamory pride flag. Jim Evans created it in 1995 in fucking MS Paint. Not using hearts was an intentional choice to: avoid stepping on the leather pride flag's toes, allow people to use it without immediately outing themselves to those not in the know, and be easily input into MS Paint. The infinity heart symbol did not exist at the time and certainly wasn't available in MS motherfucking Paint. The color symbolism is blue for honesty, red for love, black⚫ in solidarity for those that cannot be out to the world at large, and gold for the high value of each relationship. sources (x, x)

There are valid complaints that people want a pride flag that does advertise what they are, and that this design is hard on the eyes. However. Many polyamorous people still use this flag to represent themselves, most of them 35+ years old. As a personal favor to me, please do not say you hate this flag. Say the colors are too bright till you're blue in the face, sure. But to openly hate this flag is to disparage your predecessors and denounce your history.

The earliest polyamory pride flag to incorporate the infinity heart symbol that I could find actually made its debut on tumblr in 2016. The infinity heart was established as a polyamory pride symbol by this time. ratlab-art intentionally kept the original color symbolism, while using hues generally considered a little more pleasant to look at.

This one, obviously, set the precedent for numerous other iterations of the same idea -- tweaking the colors, swapping the pi for the infinity heart. I will not be posting all of them, because I doubt I could track them all down anyway. The icon I currently use on this blog is one such iteration. But this one uniquely puts the black stripe in the middle, which does make for a nice contrast with the gold.

and of course

This is the "new poly flag" designed by Red Howell for the polyamproud online vote, which took place in 2022. They call it the "tricolor polyamory pride flag" (presumably, not to distinguish it from the other established flags, but to distinguish it only from the others that were in their run-off) Its symbolism is as follows: the triangle ▶️points forward for progress and is off-center to represent the non-traditional nature of polyamory, white⚪ represents possibility, blue for honestly, magenta for love, purple for unity in the community, gold for perseverance, and obviously the heart for love.

It has garnered controversy, because they kind of... openly disparaged every previous polyamory flag and claim theirs is the one true poly flag. They do still say you can use any flag you like, but the whole vote was predicated on the assumption that no one wanted the existing designs, and no pre-existing designs were included in the vote. And that it was bad to have variants of the same flag, even though you see that with many pride flags, including the rainbow flag. Many old school polyams still don't know this design, let alone that there was a single vote years ago, which they missed. However. This flag has quickly become a popular design, especially among the younger generation. So if you would be so kind, please do not say you hate this flag. Say you're frustrated with how the process of choosing it happened, by all means. But to openly hate this flag is to disparage the next generation and sever yourself from new directions in the community.

finally,

A couple of honorable mentions made by Em Essex in 2019 and Molly Colleen Bennett Wilvich in 2020, respectively. They don't get full write-ups, but they're an additional couple of the more unique (without being downright obscure) flag designs.

Go forth with pride and knowledge,

#polyamory #polyamory history #queer history #polyamory pride flag #poly flag #polyam flag #polyamory flags #I obviously excluded a ton of designs that are still important but I'm not a historian #I'm explaining a few of the biggest shifts but I'm not writing a thesis okay #polyamorousmood original post

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julietcpulet · 3 months ago

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Jinmao and Power Dynamics

I’ve seen this debated a lot and have put my thoughts on it here and there but wanted to do kind of a master post on it. I'm only really focusing on the anime because while I know future details from the LN it's a lot to include and I think most of this back and forth centers on the way people see them currently in the anime.

There’s this general consensus that because we know Jinshi has more overall status and power in the world of Apothecary Diaries, MaoMao is automatically at the disadvantage. I’d say that notion isn’t true at all. While our modern idea is wanting to view everything through a lens of “power = bad” and the person who has it must want to use it to hurt others, we need to consider that it’s the person who determines what having power means. And if they chose to use it for the betterment of others then it’s not always a bad thing to have it in that case. Power can be given by someone who’s in the position to give it too. Jinshi may hold the power but he willingly lets it go just as often. MaoMao may not have much actual status but her superior intellect usually puts her in the power position over others as she understands more than they do.

How this works out for their relationship is easy to see. While Jinshi is quickly seen to be the one who has the greater status, he never uses it to coerce or make MaoMao do what he wants. If anything she rarely does things in the way anyone imagined and he uses his position to protect her where her own behavior might’ve gotten her into trouble overstepping.

People have mentioned that MaoMao cannot go against Jinshi now because he owns her as a servant, having bought her from the Verdigirs House. I think we’re forgetting that MaoMao agreed Jinshi taking her from there was her best option. Remember that Jinshi actually thought he was honoring her wishes in letting her go from the palace. MaoMao is the one who stupidly got herself fired thinking she couldn’t be honest with Jinshi and needed to play mental gymnastics, only to regret it. It was only when she owned up that it wasn’t what she wanted and they had a miscommunication that he again tried to find a way to help her in the best way he could, by buying her back and bringing her in as his servant. He then proceeds to never actually treat her as a servant. Instead he lets her go back to functioning almost as if nothing has changed.

Although MaoMao talks about that official / servant relationship in her head, we see she goes against it all the time. She bickers with him, she challenges his assumptions and also, he allows it. In this way it’s clear that while on the surface Jinshi has all the power, he in essence hands it to MaoMao and she feels safe to engage in this mutual back and forth with him. If anything, MaoMao is often the more “powerful” one in their dynamic as she can be rude to Jinshi, ignore him and objectify him in ways we don't see him do with her. Jinshi on the other hand is careful towards her, if occasionally teasing and hesitant to go beyond what he perceives as a limit.

For instance, he asks MaoMao before he touches her at the Verdigris House and doesn’t pester her for additional affection. When he holds her otherwise it’s almost out of necessity like when she’s injured after saving him and again when she falls after he startles her from the dance. The times when he's perceived to go beyond boundaries are usually moments when they're bantering, there's a vulnerability on either side or MaoMao is being dense and Jinshi is one of the few willing to challenge her. Examples can be like the scene where he holds onto her after she falls from the wall and him "checking" MaoMao with the head butt after she's somewhat unknowingly flirty trying to get the ox bezoar. She has sympathy on him when she sees he's upset in the first instance and in the second is only frustrated about her bezoar but doesn't think twice about Jinshi's actions, to her what they're doing is normal for them.

Jinshi is one of the few people MaoMao allows to push her on her lack of awareness related to others emotions. By persisting he's actually brought her closer to being able to relate to him and others, not just because she has to but because she might want to. And while it'll seem like a misuse of power to do these things at times, for someone like MaoMao who struggles to understand and express emotion, him using this "leverage" so to speak may be the best thing he can do for her.

This power imbalance question has come up a lot with the frog scene. I see it this way, Jinshi's the one initially uncomfortable but MaoMao persists and he doesn’t roll her off or dismiss her. He gently sets her down and tries to speak to her. It’s MaoMao who sets off their bickering. And even when Jinshi lays her down, he’s cautious and careful with her. If she felt like she were in danger in that cave there were ways to back out and she knew that. But that’s what says to me she knew there was no real threat in that moment. Were she and Jinshi overheated and pushed past their limit? Probably. Was Jinshi using his status to take things too far? Absolutely not. He was being a bit childish in the moment maybe but even MaoMao admits she provoked him and he was doing what he always does, reading MaoMao to see what is acceptable. And when she doesn’t move or object he doesn’t stop right away. He’s always listened to her when she’s been uncomfortable. I’ve done an analysis already on why I don’t think MaoMao fully objected to being in the position she was in in the cave but it certainly wasn’t due to power dynamics.

We’ve seen times before that when MaoMao truly felt cornered she could be frightening. During the whole Lakan plot when they ended up in the pleasure district and Jinshi asked her that displeasing question, he knew immediately she wasn’t happy with what he’d asked. He tries to diffuse the situation but she shakes him off and walks away. Then later when he approaches her about meeting "that weirdo" she turns on Jinshi with the look he said he would “never want to see again”. So it’s been made clear that MaoMao can make her feelings known if she wants to and Jinshi takes notice.

She and Jinshi goad each other and go back and forth all the time in a way that breaks the boundaries between their stations. If MaoMao truly cared about not angering him she’d always be submissive but she knows she can tease him because he won’t hurt her. Will they sometimes go to far? Probably, they are only 19 and 18 at this point and two people who’ve been raised with emotional issues they have to work through. But the point is that they’re working it out.

We’re so used to taking power dynamics at face value, if one has the higher status then we assume they’re going to use it to harm or manipulate the other one. But with Jinmao that simply isn’t the case. Jinshi may have the upper hand on the outside but he submits to MaoMao easily every time. He gives her control because he wants to even though he doesn’t have to. That’s what it means to have real power, knowing you can take over the situation but not always doing it out of the best interest for the other person. He helps MaoMao and is good to her by using his better status often to her advantage.

In the end it’s been proven in a multitude of ways that MaoMao trusts Jinshi and while both push each other’s limits, they know the other’s core character. So no, I don’t think power dynamics are a problem in their growing relationship. The only reason it causes them trouble is because of outside forces who impose the societal norms both Jinshi and MaoMao have no problem breaking. All in all it’s just a fictional couple and analysis for fun but I think sometimes modern sentiments have got us too fixated on this idea of making everything too black vs white, men vs women when Apothecary Diaries has been shown to give its characters a lot of nuance, realistically so almost. Anywho, thank you for coming to my TED talk 😂

#the apothecary diaries #kusuriya no hitorigoto #jinmao #jinshi x maomao #maomao #jinshi #mao mao #apothecary diaries #this my magnum opus haha #loved putting all the photos together from the show #jinmao rambles

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meanqueens · 1 year ago

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The Real Alicent Hightower

(or, a compilation of every passage in George R. R. Martin’s “Fire and Blood” pertaining to her character)

(unless i missed something, in which case please let me know and i can update this post!)

disclaimer: my goal was not to include every time her name was mentioned, but rather to highlight everything that could be indicative of her actual character (i.e. things that she did or were done to/said about her). for full contexts and details regarding other characters, i highly recommend reading F&B yourself.

Heirs of the Dragon—A Question of Succession

“Ser Otto brought his wife and children to court with him, and served King Jaehaerys faithfully for the years remaining to him. As the Old King’s strength and wits began to fail, he was oft confined to his bed. Ser Otto’s precocious fifteen-year-old daughter, Alicent, became his constant companion, fetching His Grace his meals, reading to him, helping him to bathe and dress himself. The Old King sometimes mistook her for one of his daughters, calling her by their names; near the end, he grew certain she was his daughter Saera, returned to him from beyond the narrow sea. In the year 103 AC King Jaehaerys I Targaryen died in his bed as Lady Alicent was reading to him from Septon Barth’s Unnatural History.” “Another woman had caught his eye. He announced his intention to wed Lady Alicent of House Hightower, the clever and lovely eighteen-year-old daughter of the King’s Hand, the girl who had read to King Jaehaerys as he lay dying. The Hightowers of Oldtown were an ancient and noble family, of impeccable lineage; there could be no possible objection to the king’s choice of bride. Even so, there were those who murmured that the Hand had risen above himself, that he had brought his daughter to court with this in mind. A few even cast doubt on Lady Alicent’s virtue, suggesting she had welcomed King Viserys into her bed even before Queen Aemma’s death. (These calumnies were never proved, though Mushroom repeats them in his Testimony and goes so far as to claim that reading was not the only service Lady Alicent performed for the Old King in his bedchamber.)”

“When King Viserys took Alicent Hightower to wife in 106 AC, House Velaryon was notable for its absence. Princess Rhaenyra poured for her stepmother at the feast, and Queen Alicent kissed her and named her “daughter.” The princess was amongst the women who disrobed the king and delivered him to the bedchamber of his bride.” "...mummers and singers heralded the birth of each new Targaryen princeling. Queen Alicent had soon proved to be as fertile as she was pretty. In 107 AC, she bore the king a healthy son, naming him Aegon, after the Conqueror. Two years later, she produced a daughter for the king, Helaena; in 110 AC, she bore him a second son, Aemond, who was said to be half the size of his elder brother, but twice as fierce." "“Ser Criston protects the princess from her enemies, but who protects the princess from Ser Criston?” Queen Alicent asked one day at court. The amity between Her Grace and her stepdaughter had proved short-lived, for both Rhaenyra and Alicent aspired to be the first lady of the realm…and though the queen had given the king not one but two male heirs, Viserys had done nothing to change the order of succession." "Still, questions persisted, not the least from Queen Alicent herself. Loudest amongst her supporters was her father, Ser Otto Hightower, Hand of the King." "Even after Ser Otto had returned to Oldtown, a “queen’s party” still existed at court; a group of powerful lords friendly to Queen Alicent and supportive of the rights of her sons. Against them was pitted the “party of the princess.” King Viserys loved both his wife and daughter, and hated conflict and contention. He strove all his days to keep the peace between his women, and to please both with gifts and gold and honors."

"In 111 AC, a great tourney was held at King’s Landing on the fifth anniversary of the king’s marriage to Queen Alicent. At the opening feast, the queen wore a green gown, whilst the princess dressed dramatically in Targaryen red and black. Note was taken, and thereafter it became the custom to refer to “greens” and “blacks” when talking of the queen’s party and the party of the princess, respectively. In the tourney itself, the blacks had much the better of it when Ser Criston Cole, wearing Princess Rhaenyra’s favor, unhorsed all of the queen’s champions, including two of her cousins and her youngest brother, Ser Gwayne Hightower."

"Though [Daemon] treated Queen Alicent with all the courtesy due her station, there was no warmth between them, and men said that the prince was notably cool toward her children, especially his nephews, Aegon and Aemond, whose birth had pushed him still lower in the order of succession."

"...entertained [Rhaenyra] by making mock of the greens at court, the “lickspittles” fawning over Queen Alicent and her children."

"Others assert that it was at Queen Alicent’s urging that Viserys sent Daemon away."

"Queen Alicent had her own candidate: her eldest son, Prince Aegon, Rhaenyra’s half-brother. But Aegon was a boy, the princess ten years his elder. Moreover, the two half-siblings had never gotten on well. “All the more reason to bind them together in marriage,” the queen argued. Viserys did not agree. “The boy is Alicent’s own blood,” he told Lord Strong. “She wants him on the throne.”"

"(The princess always took care to refer to Queen Alicent’s sons as half-brothers, never as brothers.)"

"Denied Rhaenyra’s favor, Criston Cole turned to Queen Alicent instead. Wearing her token, the young Lord Commander of the Kingsguard defeated all challengers, fighting in a black fury."

"King Viserys was most wroth as well; a joyous celebration had become the occasion of grief and recrimination. It was said that Queen Alicent did not share his displeasure, however; soon after, she asked that Ser Criston Cole be made her personal protector. The coolness between the king’s wife and the king’s daughter was plain for all to see; even envoys from the Free Cities made note of it in letters sent back to Pentos, Braavos, and Old Volantis."

"The court was still rejoicing over the birth of the princess’s child when her stepmother, Queen Alicent, also went into labor, delivering Viserys his third son, Daeron…whose coloring, unlike that of Jace, testified to his dragon blood. By royal command, the infants Jacaerys Velaryon and Daeron Targaryen shared a wet nurse until weaned. It was Said that the king hoped to prevent any enmity between the two boys by raising them as milk brothers. If so, his hopes proved to be sadly forlorn."

"...King Viserys was delighted with him when the child was presented at court. These feelings were not shared by his queen. “Do keep trying,” Queen Alicent told Ser Laenor, according to Mushroom, “soon or late, you may get one who looks like you.” And the rivalry between the greens and blacks grew deeper, finally reaching the point where the queen and the princess could scarce suffer each other’s presence. Thereafter Queen Alicent kept to the Red Keep, whilst the princess spent her days on Dragonstone..."

"According to Mushroom, this only served to deepen her resentment of her stepmother, Queen Alicent, who remained slender and graceful at half again her age. The sins of the fathers are oft visited on the sons, wise men have said; and so it is for the sins of mothers as well. The enmity between Queen Alicent and Princess Rhaenyra was passed on to their sons, and the queen’s three boys, the Princes Aegon, Aemond, and Daeron, grew to be bitter rivals of their Velaryon nephews, resentful of them for having stolen what they regarded as their birthright: the Iron Throne itself."

"His father and mother would never allow him to go near Vhagar, Aemond knew, much less try to ride her. So he made certain they did not know..."

"...these courtesies did not appease their vengeful mothers. Queen Alicent demanded that one of Lucerys Velaryon’s eyes should be put out, for the eye he had cost Aemond. Princess Rhaenyra would have none of that, but insisted that Prince Aemond should be questioned “sharply”..."

"His Grace further commanded his wife and daughter to kiss and exchange vows of love and affection. But their false smiles and empty words deceived no one but the king."

"King Viserys further decreed that Queen Alicent and her sons would return with him to court, whilst Princess Rhaenyra confined herself to Dragonstone with her sons."

"...bringing the princess and her sons back to King’s Landing, where more conflict with the queen and her own brood would have been inevitable."

"In King’s Landing, however, Queen Alicent grew most wroth when she learned the babe had been named Aegon, taking that for a slight against her own son Aegon…which, according to The Testimony of Mushroom, it most certainly was."

"The princess and the queen were both commanded to attend, with all their children. In a show of amity, each woman wore the other’s color and many declarations of love were made, to the king’s great pleasure. Prince Daemon raised a cup to Ser Otto Hightower and thanked him for his leal service as Hand. Ser Otto in turn spoke of the prince’s courage, whilst Alicent’s children and Rhaenyra’s greeted one another with kisses and broke bread together at table. Or so the court chronicles record."

"Queen Alicent, however, insisted that the princess and her maester had mutilated His Grace unnecessarily. Had they not “meddled,” she claimed, Grand Maester Mellos would surely have saved the king’s fingers as well as his life. She urged the appointment of one Maester Alfador, presently in service at the Hightower. Viserys, beset from both sides, chose neither, reminding both the princess and the queen that the choice was not his to make."

The Dying of the Dragons—The Blacks and the Greens

"The servant ran to inform Queen Alicent, whose apartments were on the floor below the king’s. Septon Eustace, writing on these events some years later, points out that the manservant delivered his dire tidings directly to the queen, and her alone, without raising a general alarum. Eustace does not believe this was wholly fortuitous; the king’s death had been anticipated for some time, he argues, and Queen Alicent and her party, the so-called greens, had taken care to instruct all of Viserys’s guards and servants in what to do when the day came. (The dwarf Mushroom suggests a more sinister scenario, whereby Queen Alicent hurried King Viserys on his way with a pinch of poison in his hippocras. It must be noted that Mushroom was not in King’s Landing the night the king died, but rather on Dragonstone, in service with Princess Rhaenyra.) Queen Alicent went at once to the king’s bedchamber, accompanied by Ser Criston Cole, Lord Commander of the Kingsguard. Once they had confirmed that Viserys was dead, Her Grace ordered his room sealed and placed under guard. The serving man who had found the king’s body was taken into custody, to make certain he did not spread the tale. Ser Criston returned to White Sword Tower and sent his brothers of the Kingsguard to summon the members of the king’s small council. It was the hour of the owl."

"The council convened in the queen’s apartments within Maegor’s Holdfast."

"Gathering in the queen’s chambers as the body of her lord husband grew cold above were Queen Alicent herself..."

"“Mayhaps Her Grace the queen would care to write the message, so as to soften these sad tidings with some words of condolence?”"

"“King,” insisted Queen Alicent. “The Iron Throne by rights must pass to His Grace’s eldest trueborn son.”"

"“My own head will be the first cut off, I do not doubt, but your queen, my daughter, will soon follow.” Queen Alicent echoed him. “Nor will they spare my children,” she declared. “Aegon and his brothers are the king’s trueborn sons, with a better claim to the throne than her brood of bastards. Daemon will find some pretext to put them all to death. Even Helaena and her little ones. One of these Strongs put out Aemond’s eye, never forget. He was a boy, aye, but the boy is the father to the man, and bastards are monstrous by nature.”"

"“Mayhaps the whore will die in childbirth,” Queen Alicent is reported to have said (according to Mushroom)."

"And so each of the conspirators slashed their palms and clasped hands with one another, swearing brotherhood. Queen Alicent alone amongst them was excused from the oath, on account of her womanhood. Dawn was breaking over the city before Queen Alicent dispatched the Kingsguard to bring her sons Aegon and Aemond to the council. (Prince Daeron, the youngest and gentlest of her children, was in Oldtown, serving as Lord Hightower’s squire.)"

"Ravens flew, but not to Dragonstone. They went instead to Oldtown, to Casterly Rock, to Riverrun, to Highgarden, and to many other lords and knights whom Queen Alicent had cause to think might be sympathetic to her son."

"“Then we must see that [Borros Baratheon] leads [the lesser storm lords] to our king,” Queen Alicent declared. Whereupon she sent for her second son."

"...Queen Alicent knew they could delay no longer. Prince Aegon had grown weary of secrecy. “Am I a king or no?” he demanded of his mother. “If I am king, then crown me.”"

"His mother, Queen Alicent, beloved of the smallfolk, placed her own crown upon the head of her daughter, Helaena, Aegon’s wife and sister. After kissing her cheeks, the mother knelt before the daughter, bowed her head, and said, “My Queen.”"

"...Queen Alicent had ordered Viserys’s crown locked away..."

"The princess shrieked curses all through her labor, calling down the wrath of the gods upon her half-brothers and their mother, the queen, and detailing the torments she would inflict upon them before she would let them die."

"[Rhaenyra's] first act as queen was to declare Ser Otto Hightower and Queen Alicent traitors and rebels."

"But when the two queens—his mother, Queen Alicent, and his wife, Queen Helaena— spoke in favor of Orwyle’s proposal, the truculent king gave way reluctantly. So Grand Maester Orwyle was dispatched across Blackwater Bay under a peace banner..."

The Dying of the Dragons—A Son for a Son

"Queen Alicent went pale when she heard what [Aemond] had done, crying, “Mother have mercy on us all.”"

"Unbeknownst to King Aegon, the Hand, or the Queen Dowager, [Daemon] had allies at court as well, even on the green council…"

"Instead they slipped into [Otto's] daughter’s chambers, one floor below. Queen Alicent had taken up residence there after the death of King Viserys, when her son Aegon moved into Maegor’s Holdfast with his own queen. Once inside, Cheese bound and gagged the Dowager Queen whilst Blood strangled her bedmaid. Then they settled down to wait, for they knew it was the custom of Queen Helaena to bring her children to see their grandmother every evening before bed."

"As they entered the apartments, Helaena was holding his little hand and calling out her mother’s name."

"Queen Alicent had commanded Larys Clubfoot to learn [Blood's] true name, so that she might bathe in the blood of his wife and children, but our sources do not say if this occurred."

"The king had no recourse but to take the boy from [Helaena] and give him over to their mother, the Dowager Queen Alicent, to raise as if he were her own."

The Dying of the Dragons—The Red Dragon and the Gold

"Though his mother, the Dowager Queen Alicent, spoke up in Ser Otto’s defense, His Grace turned a deaf ear to her pleading."

"...thousands left King’s Landing afterward, until the Dowager Queen Alicent ordered the city gates closed and barred."

"None was allowed to disturb [Aegon II's] rest, save his mother the Queen Dowager and his Hand, Ser Criston Cole."

"The Queen Dowager favored caution as well, urging her son to wait until his brother the king and his dragon, Sunfyre the Golden, were healed, so they might join the attack."

"...it fell to his mother, the Queen Dowager, to see to the city’s defenses. Queen Alicent rose to the challenge, closing the gates of castle and city, sending the gold cloaks to the walls, and dispatching riders on swift horses to find Prince Aemond and fetch him back. As well, she commanded Grand Maester Orwyle to send ravens to “all our leal lords,” summoning them to the defense of their true king."

"Queen Alicent’s riders got no farther than the gates, where more gold cloaks took them into custody. Unbeknownst to Her Grace, the seven captains commanding the gates, chosen for their loyalty to King Aegon, had been imprisoned or murdered the moment Caraxes appeared in the sky above the Red Keep..."

"Upon seeing that resistance was hopeless, the Dowager Queen Alicent emerged from Maegor’s Holdfast with her father, Ser Otto Hightower..."

"...Queen Alicent attempted to treat with her stepdaughter. “Let us together summon a great council, as the Old King did in days of old,” said the Dowager Queen, “and lay the matter of succession before the lords of the realm.” But Queen Rhaenyra rejected the proposal with scorn. “Do you mistake me for Mushroom?” she asked. “We both know how this council would rule.” Then she bade her stepmother choose: yield or burn. Bowing her head in defeat, Queen Alicent surrendered the keys to the castle and ordered her knights and men-at-arms to lay down their swords. “The city is yours, Princess,” she is reported to have said, “but you will not hold it long. The rats play when the cat is gone, but my son Aemond will return with fire and blood.”"

"Not even the Dowager Queen seemed to know where [Aegon II, Jaehaera, Maelor, Willis Fell, Rickard Thorne] had gone..."

The Dying of the Dragons—Rhaenyra Triumphant

"Queen Alicent was fettered at wrist and ankle with golden chains, though her stepdaughter spared her life “for the sake of our father, who loved you once.” Her own father was less fortunate."

"The Sea Snake proposed to let the Faith take charge of Dowager Queen Alicent and Queen Helaena, so that they might spend the remainder of their lives in prayer and contemplation."

"Words of these plans soon reached the ears of the Dowager Queen, filling her with terror. Fearing for her sons, Queen Alicent went to the Iron Throne upon her knees, to plead for peace. This time the Queen in Chains put forth the notion that the realm might be divided; Rhaenyra would keep King’s Landing and the crownlands, the North, the Vale of Arryn, all the lands watered by the Trident, and the isles. To Aegon II would go the stormlands, the westerlands, and the Reach, to be ruled from Oldtown. Rhaenyra rejected her stepmother’s proposal with scorn. “Your sons might have had places of honor at my court if they had kept faith,” Her Grace declared, “but they sought to rob me of my birthright, and the blood of my sweet sons is on their hands.” “Bastard blood, shed at war,” Alicent replied. “My son’s sons were innocent boys, cruelly murdered. How many more must die to slake your thirst for vengeance?” The Dowager Queen’s words only fanned the fire of Rhaenyra’s wroth. “I will hear no more lies,” she warned. “Speak again of bastardy, and I will have your tongue out.” Or so the tale is told by Septon Eustace. Munkun says the same in his True Telling. Here again Mushroom differs. The dwarf would have us believe that Rhaenyra ordered her stepmother’s tongue torn out at once, rather than merely threatening this. It was only a word from Lady Misery that stayed her hand, the fool insists; the White Worm proposed another, crueler punishment. King Aegon’s wife and mother were taken in chains to a certain brothel, and there sold to any man who wished to have his pleasure of them. The price was high; a golden dragon for Queen Alicent, three dragons for Queen Helaena, who was younger and more beautiful. Yet Mushroom says there were many in the city who thought that cheap for carnal knowledge of a queen. “Let them remain there until they are with child,” Lady Misery is purported to have said. “They speak of bastards so freely, let them each have one for their very own.”"

"...word of battle and betrayal at Tumbleton had reached King’s Landing. It is said the Dowager Queen Alicent laughed when she heard. “All they have sowed, now shall they reap,” she promised."

The Dying of the Dragons—Rhaenyra Overthrown

"If Rhaenyra were intent on murder, surely it would have been the Dowager Queen Alicent flung down onto the spikes."

"When Dowager Queen Alicent was informed of her daughter’s passing, she rent her garments and pronounced a dire curse upon her rival."

"Both were on hand the next day to bear witness as Ser Perkin’s gangling squire Trystane mounted the Iron Throne. So too was the Queen Dowager, Alicent of House Hightower."

The Dying of the Dragons—The Short, Sad Reign of Aegon II

"And so the Clubfoot was dispatched across the river under a flag of truce, accompanied by Grand Maester Orwyle and the Dowager Queen Alicent."

"There Queen Alicent received the glad news that her grandaughter Jaehaera, the only surviving child of her son Aegon and daughter Helaena, had been delivered safely to Storm’s End by Ser Willis Fell of the Kingsguard. The Dowager Queen wept tears of joy. Betrayals and betrothals followed, until an accord was reached between Lord Borros, Lord Larys, and Queen Alicent, with Grand Maester Orwyle as witness."

"Queen Alicent agreed that her son King Aegon would make Lady Cassandra, Lord Borros’s eldest daughter, his new queen."

"“[Corlys Velaryon] is traitor thrice over,” Queen Alicent said. “Rhaenyra could never have taken King’s Landing but for him. His Grace my son will not have forgotten. I want him dead.”"

"...the golden dragon banner of King Aegon II raised in their stead. Queen Alicent herself emerged from the Red Keep to bid [Borros Baratheon] welcome, with Ser Perkin the Flea beside her."

"Queen Alicent proclaimed a curfew, making it unlawful to be on the city streets after dark."

"Behind the walls of the Red Keep, the Dowager Queen Alicent and Lord Larys Strong had offered the Sea Snake his freedom, a full pardon for his treasons, and a place on the king’s small council if he would bend his knee to Aegon II as his king and deliver them the swords and sails of Driftmark."

"Queen Alicent was outraged by Lord Velaryon’s “arrogance,” Munkun tells us, especially his demand that Queen Rhaenyra’s Aegon be named as heir to her own Aegon. She had suffered the loss of two of her three sons and her only daughter during the Dance, and could not bear the thought that any of her rival’s sons should live. Angrily, Her Grace reminded Lord Corlys that she had twice proposed terms of peace to Rhaenyra, only to have her overtures rejected with scorn. It fell to Lord Larys the Clubfoot to pour oil on the troubled waters, calming the queen with a quiet reminder of all they had discussed in Lord Baratheon’s tent, and persuading her to consent to the Sea Snake’s proposals. The next day Lord Corlys Velaryon, the Sea Snake, knelt before Queen Alicent as she sat upon the lower steps of the Iron Throne, as proxy for her son, and there pledged the king his loyalty and that of his house. Before the eyes of gods and men, the Queen Dowager granted him and his a royal pardon, and restored him to his old place on the small council, as admiral and master of ships."

"Urged on by his mother, the Queen Dowager Alicent, Aegon II was determined to exact vengeance upon those who had betrayed and deposed him."

"If the rebels could flaunt a dragon and the loyalists could not, Queen Alicent pointed out, smallfolk might see their foes as more legitimate."

"Queen Alicent had reluctantly agreed to the betrothal of her granddaughter to Rhaenyra’s son, but she had done so without the king’s consent. Aegon II had other ideas."

"When Queen Alicent demured, wondering aloud how Lord Corlys could possibly be won back after all that had been said that day, Lord Strong replied, “That task you may leave to me, Your Grace. His lordship will listen to me, I daresay.”"

"His mother entertained no such hope. “You fed [Aegon III's] mother to your dragon,” she reminded her son. “The boy saw it all.” The king turned to her desperately. “What would you have me do?” “You have hostages,” the Queen Dowager replied. “Cut off one of the boy’s ears and send it to Lord Tully. Warn them he will lose another part for every mile they advance.”"

"Queen Alicent was arrested on the serpentine steps as she made her way back to her chambers. Her captors wore the seahorse of House Velaryon upon their doublets, and though they slew the two men guarding her, they did no harm to the Dowager Queen herself, nor to her ladies. The Queen in Chains was chained again and taken to the dungeons, there to await the pleasure of the new king. By then the last of her sons was already dead."

Aftermath—The Hour of the Wolf

"Within the Red Keep, the Lads found the dead king’s body laid out upon a bier beneath the Iron Throne, with his mother, Queen Alicent, weeping beside it."

"The realm’s new rulers found themselves divided on the question of what to do with the Dowager Queen Alicent, but elsewise all seemed in accord, and good fellowship reigned…for the best part of a fortnight."

"...men placed wagers on how long the Clubfoot, the Sea Snake, the Flea, and the Dowager Queen would keep their heads."

"The men who had seized the Queen Dowager upon the serpentine steps had worn the seahorse badge of House Velaryon..."

"Queen Alicent’s captors had slain her guards and were thus condemned to death..."

Under the Regents—The Hooded Hand

"And the more observant made note of another absence. The Dowager Queen was nowhere to be seen, though as Jaehaera’s grandmother, Alicent Hightower ought to have been present."

"A more immediate problem was posed by the Dowager Queen, who refused to reconcile herself to the new king. The murder of the last of her sons had turned Alicent’s heart into a stone. None of the regents wished to see her put to death, some from compassion, others for fear that such an execution might rekindle the flames of war. Yet she could not be allowed to take part in the life of the court as before. She was too apt to rain down curses on the king, or snatch a dagger from some unwary guardsman. Alicent could not even be trusted in the company of the little queen; when last allowed to share a meal with Her Grace, she had told Jaehaera to cut her husband’s throat whilst he was sleeping, which set the child to screaming. Ser Tyland felt he had no choice but to confine the Queen Dowager to her own apartments in Maegor’s Holdfast; a gentle imprisonment, but imprisonment nonetheless."

"One death may have been a mercy. The Dowager Queen Alicent of House Hightower, second wife of King Viserys I and mother to his sons, Aegon, Aemond, and Daeron, and his daughter Helaena, died on the same night as Lord Westerling, after confessing her sins to her septa. She had outlived all of her children and spent the last year of her life confined to her apartments, with no company but her septa, the serving girls who brought her food, and the guards outside her door. Books were given her, and needles and thread, but her guards said Alicent spent more time weeping than reading or sewing. One day she ripped all her clothing into pieces. By the end of the year she had taken to talking to herself, and had come to have a deep aversion to the color green. In her last days the Queen Dowager seemed to become more lucid. “I want to see my sons again,” she told her septa, “and Helaena, my sweet girl, oh…and King Jaehaerys. I will read to him, as I did when I was little. He used to say I had a lovely voice.” (Strangely, in her final hours Queen Alicent spoke often of the Old King, but never of her husband, King Viserys.) The Stranger came for her on a rainy night, at the hour of the wolf."

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lover-of-mine · 7 months ago

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Blue and yellow coding of Eddie's arc this half of the season just because I feel like making this post.

As usual, the theory is that Eddie will work his way to his yellow in the same way that Buck worked his way to his blue, his blue being the coming out scene blue. (Overview and links to all the posts I made on that here).

Also please remember that in the search for yellow, yellow means gold/honey/sunlight, orangy/yellow type tones.

First of all, no place like home (I made a detailed post on the episode that you can read here), but all the scenes about Eddie include blue and yellow elements and we got out first sandy yellow color when he was talking to Bobby.

His 2 part confession in confessions is also yellow and blue. How warm the actual confessional is, is also an interesting point when you add in the amount of blue elements in the juice shop.

Something that I keep talking about Buck's arc is that he does not match the background during his discovery, but he matches when it's about Eddie (aka the right choice), so the fact that Eddie already matches is worth noting. That's also true for when he's in the 804 yellow, bathenas apartment is very warm and he matches the background pretty well.

That yellow shirt also happens to be the shirt Eddie is wearing during the 601 dinner which happens to be 1 of 2 explicitly blue and yellow buddie scenes. When I say explicitly I mean that's part of the color of their shirt/jacket because that's usually the focus of an outfit.

The other one is the will reveal.

And we have all the blue and yellow elements during the conversation he has with Brad during wannabes.

Something worth noting here is the way everyone is wearing gloves while cleaning. The hose and rags are usually yellow but the addition of the gloves for the blue is intentional, take buzzkill for example, no gloves while cleaning.

Something I think it's particularly interesting is the way that he works as a divider almost, behind him to the left there is no yellow, just blue, but to the right we have all the yellow equipment and the people behind him with the rags. Also because the shelf of white hose highlights the way that the one behind Brad is supposed to be noticed.

There's also that rope behind him hanging in the dining room that weirdly looks like caution tape. That and the little yellow elements in the fridge.

Honorable mentions include: yellow organic fruit leader.

And the blue and yellow coding of the well callback in 806. I put this down here because technically this call is about Chim's plotline but it is an eddie begins callback that is very blue and yellow, so...

But something else I wanna point out is the way that in my post explaining the Eddie finding his color theory (that post can be found here), I mentioned the way that Chris is red. His crutches are red, his glasses are red, he's in yellow and red when he leaves.

And the scenes tend to have all 3 primary colors, most of the scenes also have a lot of red elements, so if we have Chris as the red, Buck as the blue, and Eddie as the yellow and the red keeps being included in the conversation, it's almost as if they are keeping Chris involved because Eddie can't make the discovery without Chris.

That is interesting with the buddie's parenting crisis maroon.

And the red and blue for parenting as a whole that was solidified once again with madney's pregnancy (meta on that applied to buddie and 710 here).

So if we consider the possibility that they are doing some really elaborate color theory game here to make sure Eddie finds all his colors, they are basically making the Buckley-Diaz family its own little group of primary colors so Eddie can make all of them. And considering that my base statement is that they are trying to show that Eddie can't live his life as a secondary color, especially since a lot of us associate green with Eddie, or earthy tones in general, this is a fun theory to think about.

He can't figure it all out without Christoper, but the addition of the blue means he also can't figure it all out without Buck. So the idea that he's stuck right now because he doesn't have one-third of the equation and if he does move to Texas he would also be missing a piece, but choosing to go get Chris and stay in LA will give him all the elements.

Anyway, this got way longer than I expected when I started typing aoksasaok, as usual, if you read this I love you 💜

taglist (interact with this post if you wanna get tagged)

@sparkedblaze @caw-salem @dreamofsomepiphany @100ceruleaneyes @chaosqueery @gina-spike @chimchiminie98 @elvensorceress @singitforthegirls @dangerpronebuddie @steadfastsaturnsrings @sparklespiff @inell @miles--to--go @jesuisici33 @wolfdeans @lunarsolar1 @joshwritesfics @glasscities @kejfeblintz @stagefoureddiediaz @mosaicstardust @eddiedisasterdiaz @hermioneindisguise @queerprincesseddiediaz @lookforanewangle @becausebuckley @lemotmo @thenainitaldisaster @epiaphany @trudayss @shelfthe-reader @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @buckgettingstruck @scoupsahoy @the-whispers-of-death @iced-coffee-jesus @izzysbeans @thegeekcompanion @sunflower-eddiediaz @bucks-daddy-issues @linus-lucy

@dingdongfries @angelcamael

#911 #911 spoilers #thoughts thoughts thoughts #911 meta #911 speculation #dude if im right #if ryan pops up in yellow i will go into cardiac arrest lol #blue and yellow #color theory

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tenpintsof-sundrop · 6 months ago

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My Top 10 Fics Of 2024

So, I have decided that I am gonna do the same thing that I did last year because I had so much fucking fun with this last time and it's a great way to look back and reflect on all the hard work I have done this year. And I am counting these down not based on statistics - not how many likes these posts have or how 'popular' they are, but based on how much I like them, and I get to really reflect on how writing these fics made me feel. And that is truly the most important part of fanfiction - how much fun I am having. So I am really happy and excited to reflect on all the awesome stuff I have written this year.

And I think a really great sign is that I had an incredibly difficult time with this year's ranking. Because I wrote so many amazing fics that I had so much fun with. Even if I had a really (not so fun) incident where I came very close to quitting fanfiction altogether, I had a lot of fun, and I wrote a lot of amazing things that I am so fucking proud of. And I'm only including fics in this ranking that I have posted (which is why I strategically waited until after certain fics were posted to write and make this ranking) - and not even including ones I have written and not yet posted, which are also fics I absolutely fucking love. So even if this year may not have been great for my mental health or my physical health, this year was a year where I felt great and comfortable and happy as an artist.

Anyway, here's the ranking!!

This year I posted 20 different fics consisting of over 250,000 words - and that is not including the fics I have not edited and the unfinished WIPs I have in my drafts.

Also keep in mind, if you randomly see this post in tags and you don't follow me, this is my main blog and not my fanfiction blog. My fanfiction blog is @sundrop-writes - you can follow me there to check out my fics and follow me for all my exciting fanfiction adventures in 2025.

Honorable Mentions:

Meddle About - Sub!Spencer Reid x Dom!Fem!Reader (6,300 words). I was slightly conflicted about if I should put this on the list or not, because currently, this is (in terms of statistics) the most popular fic on my blog right now, and usually when a fic is super popular, I am less inclined to like it. But this list is supposed to be strictly about how I feel about my fics and the experience I had while writing them. And I did really enjoy the experience of writing this fic - it was really fun to write something absolutely kinky and filthy and to write a fic that was so truly stuck in my head. I had a lot of fun with it.

The Restricted Section - Dom!Hermione Granger x Sub!Fem!Reader x (Secret Voyeur) Harry Potter (4,400 words). This is one of my absolute favourite fics that I have written this year, and it just didn't make the top ten because other fics were more my favourite. I loved writing this because it was such a fun PWP and it was one of those instances where I had the idea and then the fic was posted like a day later. It's a lot of fun.

Tongue Twister - Sub!Gar Logan x Dom!GN!Reader (2,000 words). This is one that I actually forgot that I wrote this year - it feels like so long ago lmao. But I really loved it when I wrote it, I love it now. I will always love Gar so much, and I love writing slutty fics about him.

Eager Little Puppy - Sub!Isaac Lahey x Dom!GN!Reader (2,700 words). This is by far one of my favourite things I have written this year - Isaac is one of my new favourite characters, and I have absolutely loved writing about him (and I look forward to writing more about him in the future). This is just a representation of how much I love him.

One Moment Per Episode With Dick Grayson - Dick Grayson x Fem!Reader (8,300 words). This is another one that I forgot was from this year because it feels like so long ago. I really fucking love the concept and I really, really want to continue it further in 2025 (feel free to send me messages if you are excited about it and want to see more, because I would like to set aside some specific time to work on it). Anyway - I really love the start of it and I really love what I have planned for this fic in the future.

Now, onto The Top Ten:

10. Precious Time Alone (aka The Knot Fic) - Gar Logan x Fem!Reader (11,800 words)

Even with the ability to see the future, you never would have guessed that your life would lead you to falling in love with the perfect man - someone sweet, caring, funny, cute. Someone with the passion and fire to protect the ones that he loves no matter what. A precious guy with green hair who had the ability to transform into a tiger at will. And when you finally made love to him for the first time, you never could have guessed how that unique ability affected his sex life. You weren’t exactly complaining, but you wished you had seen this coming. At the end of the day, it was just another thing about him to love. Or - Neither you nor Gar knew that he has the ability to knot, and you both find out for the first time when you have sex together. Gar Logan x Fem!Powered!Reader. Established Relationship. Smut/PWP. Set during Season 2, Episode 9.

It's such an interesting coincidence that both this year and last year, the number ten slot contains a Gar fic that is a re-make/re-post. I have a lot of fics that are only on AO3 and not on Tumblr, and I highly recommend that you check out my AO3 for that reason, but if I am transferring a fic from AO3 to Tumblr, I love to go through and do some edits on it and see how I can improve it before I post it again.

I absolutely loved this fic when I first posted it, and I love it even more with the edits - including the new scene that I added. It is such a fun idea that could be considered Crack Fic (so often, I write Crack Fic concepts but I treat them seriously) - the idea that Gar has a Knot because he is 'an animal' (or because he has animal DNA). It's such a funny idea, but it was fun and hot to write porn about it.

I love this fic, and if it is your thing and you would enjoy reading it, I hope that you enjoy it too.

9. The Way You Miss Me - Fred Weasley x Fem!Reader (18,500 words)

Fred broke up with you. He made it clear that he was going to have a new life when he opened his shop, and he didn’t need you to be a part of it. You being stuck on him was just another joke in a long line of pranks that he pulled. And life kept on laughing at you when your fear of heights was triggered by a potentially life ending mission the Order put together that had you dangling hundreds of feet over London, held up only by Fred’s strength and determination. So what does it mean when the two of you land, and he’s the only thing that can stop your shaking panic? What does it mean when he’s looking at you with nothing but love in his eyes, holding you tight like a lover would? Fred Weasley x Fem!Reader. Exes to Lovers. Emotional Angst and Smut. Set during Deathly Hallows.

This fic is one of the reasons that the ranking was so difficult. This one got moved around a lot because I had so much fun writing it and working on it. I am also super proud of this fic because originally, the idea was going to be part of a much longer fic, and I am so glad that I was able to pull off the emotions and the tone that I wanted in a much shorter word count that took me a lot less time. It makes me incredibly proud of myself - that I don't feel like I have to spend months and months on an idea in order to truly pull it off.

I fucking love this fic and I am so happy with how it turned out.

8. Why Am I The One? - Isaac Lahey x Fem!Reader (15,200 words)

Isaac loves you. He loves you more than anything else in the world - which is exactly why he has stayed away from you for so long. But when Derek kicks him out onto the street in the pouring rain with absolutely no warning and no reasoning as to why, Isaac has nowhere else to go. He could claim that he sought you out because you’re close by, because he knows that you won’t turn him away in his time of need - but deep down, it’s because he misses you. And staying away from you for so long is the hardest, stupidest thing he has ever done. Isaac Lahey x Fem!Reader. Exes to Lovers. Smut and Emotional Angst. Set during Season 3, Episode 4.

Again, this is one that made the ranking very hard. I enjoyed the process of writing this so fucking much. I was immediately inspired when I saw the episode, and as soon as I saw it, I started working on this fic - the imagery of Isaac so slutty in his white shirt sparks the temptation to write smut, but I love the emotional depth of him being a literal kicked puppy (after being kicked out by Derek) and being emotionally vulnerable and needing some place to go and someone to turn to. It is literally a perfect recipe for the kind of smut I write - super hot sex with emotional depth because one of the characters is feeling vulnerable. It's perfect.

This fic is exactly what I wanted it to be when I set out to write it, and I especially loved exploring Isaac's grief for Erica (which is by far not explored enough in the show) and I might do a continuation of it in the future, I'm not sure. Either way, I think it's fantastic, and it definitely deserves a spot on this list.

7. She Keeps Me Up - Dom!MILF!Jennifer Jareau x Sub!Fem!Reader (3,100 words)

JJ is protective of you. When you offer yourself up as ‘bait’ to lure in an UnSub who is killing women of your type, she protests endlessly about it - but ultimately she can’t stop you. She can, however, possessively lay her claim on you when you get back from the ordeal with nothing more than a tiny scratch. Dom!Jennifer Jareau x Sub!Fem!Reader. Established Dom/Sub Relationship. Smut/PWP.

Like I said, this list is all about reflecting, and I was considering wiping all Criminal Minds fics off this list because of the experience that I had - but that wouldn't be fair to my past self or fair to my art. Especially because this is one of my favourite fics I have ever written and whenever I listen to the song that I titled it for, I still have incredibly fond memories of writing this fic.

I think that MILF!JJ is my favourite version of JJ, even though - ironically - I haven't seen a lot of the later seasons. But way too many people obsess over Professor Reid and Grey Haired Prentiss (who I also love, don't get me wrong) - but I think there is not enough love for MILF!JJ. Not by far. I want to be her controversially younger girlfriend.

I actually have something in my drafts that is MILF!JJ centric, and if I finished it, it would be the only thing that could get me to stray back into the Criminal Minds fandom. I am so down bad for JJ, it's not even funny. (So - if you wanna see more of her, feel free to come in my inbox and let me know.)

6. Blood In The Water - Void!Stiles Stilinski x Fem!Reader (11,700 words)

Being Stiles’s best friend, you are incredibly worried about him when you figure out that he is quite literally not himself - and that the thing currently occupying his body could be destroying it in the process. When you approach him to show this concern, Void takes a particular interest in you. He’s not capable of love, or even fondness, but he likes you. And he likes the way your fear spikes when you talk about Stiles. So he makes you a deal - he’ll agree to take care of this fleshy, mortal host, in exchange for something more precious, more rare, and more delicious than the meal you have brought for Stiles. He wants your pain. He wants your tears. Void!Stiles Stilinski x Fem!Reader. Pining Best Friends. Extreme Emotional Angst, Hurt No Comfort. Set during Season 3 (with flashbacks to Season 1, Episode 11).

Another one that made the ranking so hard. This fic was so much fun to write, because as I said in the A/N for it - I fucking love writing villains. I love writing characters who are absolutely unambiguously evil. I do think it's a big of a shame that the recent cultural shift is to write villains as morally ambiguous or to take characters who are evil (or morally grey shifting more towards 'bad' in the canon) and soften them up so much in fanfiction to make it seem like they did nothing wrong.

A lot of people write Void as one of those "he is bad but he won't hurt me because he loves me uwu" characters and I really don't like that - because I want to write him as a character who is absolutely fucking incapable of love. He does not know love, he doesn't know what it is, and he has absolutely no softness or fondness for any person.

I really want to write a sequel to this fic - I have one drafted out that I think would be so fucking good - and I think I want to make it one of my goals for 2025 to complete and post the sequel. Anyway, just this fic as it is, I fucking love it, and I had such a fantastic time writing it.

5. Downhill - Draco Malfoy x Fem!Reader (20,100 words)

Draco knows his place in the world. He is a Malfoy, he is Pureblood. He is supposed to marry, carry on the Pureblood line. He is supposed to do everything that his parents would - including killing, if it’s what his Dark Lord wishes. Draco Malfoy is not supposed to hesitate. He is not supposed to feel fear. He is not supposed to have room in his heart for fondness, or even love. Not even when it comes to his bartered and bought fellow Pureblood fiancee. Love is nothing but a weakness. And Malfoys are not weak. Draco Malfoy x Fem!Reader. Arranged Marriage/Hesitant Lovers. Emotional Angst and Smut. Set during Half-Blood Prince.

This is one of the fics that caused me to strategically wait to make and post this whole list lmao. And I am glad that I actually got this fic posted when I wanted to, and I'm glad that I waited. I have had this fic brewing in my drafts for a long time, and I have had the general idea for it in my head for a lot longer. I've actually had the idea in my head for longer than the original fic existed (the fic that this is a prequel to) and when I figured out that I could utilise my idea here, I was so excited.

I love writing about the real consequences of Draco being a Death Eater and I fucking love writing the Arranged Marriage trope, and this was all my favourite things to write about rolled up into one. And I also loved writing the inclusion of Harry having a very shallow one-sided crush on the reader when she is too busy actually falling in love with Draco to notice. This was incredibly fun for me to write and I absolutely love how it turned out - so it is by far one of my favourite fics I have written this year.

4. Figure It Out - A Criminal Minds Casefic (18,000 words)

Since you joined the BAU, you have been keeping a terrible secret from the team. When the team takes a case in your hometown - your festering secret comes to be known with a vengeance. Fem!Reader x Gen!BAU Team (Platonic). General Casefic, modelled after a Criminal Minds episode. Angst, Mystery, Hurt and Comfort. Set during Criminal Minds Season 3.

I feel like this list would be incomplete if I did not include the fic I obsessed over as my first fic of the year. This fic really did a lot for me as an artist - for so long I have been wanting to write something with a similar concept to the music video for Figure It Out by Royal Blood (something where the story essentially goes in reverse and more details are revealed along the way, constantly changing who you believe is the villain vs who is the victim). The first time I saw that music video, it changed me and I have been so radically inspired by it ever since.

And because this idea has been sitting in my head for literal years, I am so fucking proud that I managed to do it justice. And I do think that Criminal Minds is the perfect backdrop to do this kind of idea with, and I think that this is actually a kind of radical artistic episode that they might actually do.

I would also love to use this format for other fandoms (I think it would work so well for The Walking Dead especially, and you guys know that I want to apply everything I do to Titans) - so I am so glad that I wrote this fic and gained confidence in writing something with an usual format and that I just got to have fun with it.

3. When Doves Cry - Jason Todd x Gar Logan (11,100 words)

At Dick’s insistence, Jason comes back to Wayne Manor to help the Titans end Crane’s deadly plan. Jason doesn’t want redemption or forgiveness - he’s done believing that he’s worthy of those. Once Crane is back at Arkham where he belongs, Jason plans to disappear, never to be heard from again. But Gar - someone who never stopped loving Jason and never stopped believing in his goodness - has other plans. Jason Todd x Gar Logan. Friends to Lovers/Lovers Reunited. Smut and Emotional Angst. Set during Season 3, Episode 13.

This fic is absolutely so fucking special to me. This is actually one of my only fics that has a dedication, even though most of my romance based fics should be dedicated to @nctzenkane - because he is the love of my life and he inspires most of my romance based fics in one way or another.

I wrote this fic at a time when I was really struggling as an artist. If you have been following me all year, then you will likely know about an incident where I spent months writing a longer fic, and that fic garnered some complaints and hate comments, and when I spoke up with my distaste for those comments - I was basically told to shut up, and I was told that fanfic readers have a right to be rude and treat fic authors like shit the second that we post our work to the 'public'.

And it really demotivated me and the whole incident really made me thoroughly consider quitting writing altogether, especially considering the fact that my chronic illness is getting worse each year and every single time I successfully post a fic, more and more work has gone into that fic behind the scenes (past my illness) in order to make that fic 'visible to the public'.

All of this to say that I was feeling down, disappointed and lost, and I asked Jaycen what to do - what I should write to truly make myself feel confident and good in my art again. I asked him to request something because I needed some inspiration and some artistic direction. And he requested this fic - because he usually only enjoys romances between canon character pairings (and he loves JayGar because I majorly fed him the juice on that) and he knows that Titans is my strong suit.

The fic is also incredibly special to me because the song is also incredibly special - even though I fucking love 80s music, I didn't really listen to Prince until Jaycen encouraged me to, and when I listened to this song for the first time, it really wormed its way in as one of my all time favourite songs. And it suits these characters and their dynamic so well in addition to being such a beautifully personal song to me.

So yeah - this fic is gonna go down in history as one of my top five favourite fics of all time, not just from this year. And it definitely made the ranking a lot harder.

2. Heaven's Gate - Daryl Dixon x GN!Reader (24,200 words)

Hope. Not the fragile, delicate thing that everyone mistakes it to be. Hope is stubborn, and grows inside of you long before you ever realize its purpose there. Hope can’t be crushed by a thousand pound tank or torn apart as easily as concrete walls can. Hope is balanced on the backs of songbirds, it whistles quietly in the wind, and it brings you right where you need to be (even if you don’t know it). Daryl Dixon x GN!Reader. Strangers to Lovers/Lovers Reunited. Emotional Angst, Hurt and Comfort, Fluff. Set during Seasons 1-5.

This is another fic that is so fucking special to me, and that's why it's so close to the top of the ranking. I have had this idea in mind for years probably - I fucking love the concept of any fic that involves reunions when it comes to The Walking Dead (and I could write 10,000 more fics based on this concept) because every single moment of reunion in the show just fucking gets me. Even though I don't really like Rick and Lori's relationship (and I love Lori, don't mistake me as a Lori hater - never), the moment where Rick gets out of the cube van and reunites with Carl and Lori for the first time in the first season - it gives me goosebumps every single time without fail.

So I simply aim to recreate that feeling with my fics.

Also - the bird symbolism. When I lived at my old place, I had a bird feeder right outside my window, and I used to do a lot of bird watching. And I became familiar with certain bird species and the rarity of certain types of birds, and there is just something hopeful that ignites within you when you see a particularly rare bird - and it is a myth I have heard that cardinals represent good luck (likely because of their rarity) when you see them.

And I love how the whole fic evolved to represent hope, which I think is something we all need more of in our lives. During this year of existential dread and sadness, it felt really good to write something that was purely about happiness and hope.

1. The Jaws of Life - Jason Todd x GN!Reader (19,900 words)

You and Jason don’t really hate each other - at least not anymore. Your feelings for each other are more than complicated, and before you have time to figure it all out, you have to part ways. Jason goes back to Gotham at Bruce’s behest, and you’re off to visit a long lost relative that you didn’t even know cared about you. Unfortunately, while you’re apart, the Joker makes things even more complicated with a phone call and a gun. And your world comes crashing down before you can even put names to all the stars in your sky. Jason Todd x GN!Powered!Reader. Friends With Benefits to Lovers/Lovers Reunited. Smut, Extreme Emotional Angst, Hurt and Comfort. Set during Season 3.

Here is the big number one! I am giving this one the top spot even though it's incomplete (and I am kind of biased because in my head, I am including how amazing stuff from the second part is) - and maybe it's just an excuse to include such an amazing fic in two different 'Top 10 Fics of The Year' posts lmao. Because when I post the second part in January, technically it will count for next year too.

But anyway - I love this fic so fucking much. This fic has been so long in the making, and I love every single aspect of it - the emotions, the metaphors, the length. This is one of those fics that is perfect to me because it came out exactly how I wanted it to be in my head. I am so utterly proud of this fic, and I am so glad that people are getting to read it now, even if it is just the first part.

Anyway - that's all for this year, and I am sooo looking forward to seeing what I can come up with next year.

#sundrop speaks #fanfiction #gar logan x reader #dc titans fanfiction #fred weasley x reader #harry potter fanfiction #isaac lahey x reader #teen wolf fanfiction #jennifer jareau x reader #criminal minds fanfiction #stiles stilinski x reader #void!stiles x reader #draco malfoy x reader #daryl dixon x reader #the walking dead fanfiction #jason todd x reader

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cosmicfandomvegan · 24 days ago

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My hot take: Who does Kakashi Hatake love the most?

We all remember that heartbreaking moment where Sasuke asked Kakashi:

And Kakashi responded:

This narrows it down to:

Sakumo

Obito

Rin

Minato

Whose grave does he visit the most? Hm, that would be both Obito or Rin's.. followed closely by Sakumo.

Who does he talk about the most? Minato tbh. Always "the Fourth" this, "the Fourth" that. lmao

He mentions Obito but not by name, only calling him his 'best friend' but he quotes him 24/7.

He only brought up Sakumo that time Chiyo mistook him for his dad. This is in no way an indication that Kakashi loves his dad any less, but it's just another notable observation I as the viewer have made.

Even though he loves and misses her, he never brings Rin up at all. This is likely due to guilt for killing her, but you'd think he'd bring up other good things about her, like he does with Obito, but he's radio silent. :(

Whose teachings does he live by the most?

Originally he lived his life with Sakumo’s “mistake” in mind (trying to do the opposite) until Obito tore it down by telling him that no, Sakumo was actually correct! And Kakashi, rule-following Kakashi, had talk-no-jutsu used on him for the first time by Obito 😭

You could say that because of Obito, he now lives by Sakumo's ideals, but it's clear that he's not living by Sakumo's ideals, but Obito's specifically... Right down to becoming a sensei who's often tardy... kinda like a certain 'dead' best friend... So.. not something he borrowed from Sakumo after all.

He never once talks about any of Rin's ideals, and tbh we don't know much about her. He loved her as a teammate and older sister, but her death was clearly overshadowed by Obito's.

As Hokage, Minato valued mission success, not coldly, but as a leader who understood hard choices. Minato tried to temper Kakashi’s rigidity post-Obito’s "death," but Minato's own philosophy still leaned toward "complete the objective" (e.g., his quick decision-making during war, prioritizing strategic victories). Kakashi idolized him, but Minato never fully shook Kakashi’s belief that missions > people, because Minato himself operated within that system.

Instead, Kakashi constantly references Obito's, "Those who break the rules are scum… but those who abandon their friends are worse than scum," even tho it directly contradicts his earlier belief (based off of Sakumo's tragedy).

Essentially, Kakashi rejected his father’s values (comrades > mission) until Obito redeemed them. Kakashi still lives by Obito’s ideals because he genuinely loves him so much, which was the only reason how Obito no longer being part of his life was able to affect him so much. This all makes Obito by far the most transformative and important figure in his life.

Obito’s impact on Kakashi goes beyond everyone else. While Minato offered guidance, Sakumo’s death toughened him, and Rin’s death solidified Obito’s beliefs in Kakashi’s heart, it was Obito alone who tore apart Kakashi’s worldview and rebuilt it. Kakashi keeps Obito’s memory alive in everything he does, treating his teachings as sacred and passing it to every new generation, visiting his grave very regularly, and constantly honoring him—even after learning about his betrayal.

Kakashi’s quick forgiveness and defense of Obito show that his loyalty is rooted in genuine love, not guilt. Obito’s the only one Kakashi failed, mourned, fought, and very quickly forgave unconditionally (even knowing Obito started the 4th great ninja war and was responsible for so many deaths, including the deaths of Minato and Kushina whom he loved). He forgave him like you would forgive a family member, not like just a friend, because Obito was like the big brother Kakashi never had—someone he couldn’t save, and that bond shaped them both deeply.

Even after the truth about Obito came out, Kakashi’s love for him didn’t fade—it only somehow ended up making their love for one another stronger, since everything Obito did in his own words was for Kakashi and himself to be able to live in a world where all three (including Rin) were back together again, untouched by death's grip.

Even though Kakashi forms close bonds with Team 7 and Gai in his adult life, his connection with Obito is still by far the most significant. Dude would've let himself be killed after Obito was unmasked had it not been for Naruto saving him from Obito's fire attack last minute. (Hell, not even Obito expected that, since we learn that Obito never intended to kill him!) After the face reveal, Kakashi's eyes looked so dead even though Gai had quickly recovered from the shock of who Tobi was.

Obito is firmly in "the one that got away" category of Kakashi's life. Like, if Obito had stayed an ally, Obito and Kakashi would've been the dynamic, unstoppable duo (<-vid) that the enemies ran from. That's why Kishi couldn't allow Obito to stay an ally.. If Obito had not sided with Madara, he would've been Kakashi's right-hand man, his very best friend whom he did everything with.. Instead, Kakashi had to settle for another comedic bestie, Gai (whom I love as well—but Kakashi and I both know it’s just not the same. That’s why he didn’t consider Gai one of the people he loved—at that time, they weren’t that close yet; they were true rivals).

I truly think there will never be another person that Kakashi will love more than Obito Uchiha. It's no wonder he still wanted Obito to live.. even knowing all the crimes he committed:

Because then, at least, Kakashi would still have his brother—someone he loved deeply—alive, and that would be all that mattered. We all know Kakashi was so ready to help Obito atone every step of the way, like his own personal parole officer, the one Obito could lean on to help keep him in line.

Some say it's crazy to think Obito would've been able to just live freely if he'd survived, but .. uhhh.. Orochimaru??? And redeemed Obito is far safer/more stable than Snake-man. -_- Maybe he'd just need someone to track his every movement.. like Yamato did for Orochimaru. So heck, Hokage Kakashi would've let Obito be his advisor or something probably... llol XD Just to keep him close. c:

Any love interest Kakashi might have in future will pale in comparison to his love for Obito. I really think Kakashi will be an eternal bachelor like Gaara since he's already in his 50s in Boruto & still single.. It really peaked at Obito lol.

TLDR; Obito is Kakashi’s greatest love (even though I ship them so hard, I personally do not think they are in love, but Kakashi loves Obito as a brother) and that love trumps all other loves he's had in his life because in the series, as in most shonen anime, brotherly love is super highly esteemed (eg Itachi/Sasuke for example).

#kakaobi #kakashi hatake #obito uchiha #kakashi #obito #kakaobi meta #ive been soooo obsessed with these two ugh #literally crying #a little bit #didnt even realize it til i wiped tears away #this has been in my drafts for so long oml

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 9 months ago

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What an interesting question highlighted by Leona about Skully J.Graves gallantry !

Seriously who of all NRC students or not students is the most close to the true definition of a gentleman ?

[Referencing this post!]

Proof that L*ona is a chad…

The definition of gentleman I’ll be running with is pulled from Merriam-Webster: a man who combines gentle birth or rank with chivalrous qualities. a man whose conduct conforms to a high standard of propriety or correct behavior, and/or a man of independent means who does not engage in any occupation or profession for gain.

Condensed, this means the traits we’re looking for someone who is of “gentle birth” (high social status) that follows or displays traits in line with the code of chivalry. Chivalry includes, but is not limited to: bravery, loyalty, generosity, courtesy, protection of the weak and defenseless, being truthful, and fearing God respecting women. They also conform to “correct” behavior and do not act for selfish reasons.

Well, automatically I feel like most of the NRC cast is disqualified because the majority of them are some degree of dishonest or acting for personal gain. (This would, ironically, also put Leona out of the running since bro’s the most underhanded cat I know.) A couple of them would also violate respecting personal boundaries.

I feel like the “obvious” answer here is Silver, since 1) he’s a literal knight and prince and 2) probably one of the few genuinely nice guys on NRC campus. And yeah, I’m still sticking with Silver as my first choice here.

My runner-up would be Riddle, just because Riddle would be so anal about “following the rules” of chivalry and maintaining decorum due to his strict upbringing. He indicates in the ongoing Halloween event that Skully is “such a gentleman” and that he has to keep up with him. I also think Riddle has some of the least selfish reasons for being polite; he legitimately considers it proper behavior and is convinced acting in line with the rules will bring people happiness.

Honorable mentions:

Jack (tsundere, but generally has the right idea going on in terms of proper behavior; will right his wrongs as shown in his Lab Wear vignettes)

Deuce (helps out his mom, tries to be an upstanding man; might fumble here and there but he is earnestly trying.)

And a special shoutout to Vil because he is the only other Twst character to have kissed Yuu, and, unlike Skully, Vil actually asks if it’s okay to kiss them before he does so. This occurs in book 6, upon his rescue. However, I would not otherwise consider Vil a gentleman because he can be pretty nasty and underhanded when he bears a vendetta. In this event alone Vil suggests outright abandoning us and also that we should beat suspicious people black and blue 💀

Of the staff, I definitely feel like Trein is our strongest gent. He is very austere and holds himself and his students to high standards, even becoming upset when he believes that his students are of such poor moral character that they would abandon the RSA boys who sacrificed themselves to allow them to escape. Trein is also known to chastise others, notably Crewel, for acting out or saying rude things. There’s no comparison, really.

#twisted wonderland #twst #Leona Kingscholar #Vil Schoenheit #Riddle Rosehearts #Silver #Skully J. Graves #book 6 spoilers #Yuu #disney twisted wonderland #disney twst #notes from the writing raven #question #Deuce Spade #Jack Howl #Mozus Trein #Glorious Masquerade spoilers #Jack lab wear vignette spoilers

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himezoro · 1 year ago

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roronoa zoro's guide to relationship

before anything : tysm for your support on my first post!! i'm working on a long piece to celebrate starring the loml here. feel free to request anything your heart desires, i'll be happy to oblige ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

here's a headcanon of what a relationship with roronoa zoro would include in my opinion.

warning: gn reader, use of "you" and "them", sfw, but sexual intercourses implied! i'll write a dedicated nsfw one if you want to ;)

wc : 1,070k+.

being in a relationship with roronoa zoro would include :

being used as a body pillow. zoro is a heavy sleeper, and his s/o would be the best body pillow ever. he won't admit it, but he feels pretty sad when he's on watch duty and can't sleep alongside their s/o in their shared bed. if his s/o complains about being too hot, he would much prefer pouring an ice cold buck of water upon them rather than moving his body a little. his giant body won't move.

being teased about your habits. zoro is observant and likes a good laugh. so, he would pick on all the small (cute) things his s/o does that feel funny to him. you're sleeping with a stuffed bear ? he would tease you by arranging it in the most deranged scenes ever. you're hugging any of your newest purchase after buying them ? he would tease you by mimicking you with his bottle of sake. be prepared to be constantly teased on.

however, this man won't let anyone make fun of you, and would always defend your honor (even if that third party would make fun of the same things he teases you about). he would yell at luffy and usopp so bad if they dared pulling the smallest of prank on you (remember that scene where he makes luffy drink a whole glass of water at the baratie ? yeah he'll make him drink the whole ocean this time lol)

having his hand on the small of your back while you walk. when a crewmate mentions it to him, he just huffs and acts like "it's nothing". actually, he didn't even notice it himself, but the way his hand falls on your back so naturally is beyond any scientific reasonings. this gesture alone speaks volumes about his love and affection.

making you talk about the smallest of things. roronoa zoro is not the most chattery in the whole crew, but he lives for listening to the voice of their s/o. he would ask you to read a passage of the book you're reading, talk about what you liked and disliked for hours, the latest gossip on the Sunny, anything would make him happy. his head would naturally fall on your lap as he daydreams while rocking on the sound of your honey-like voice. (he would love hearing your voice in bed)

being trusted, valued and respected. zoro would give his all to his s/o. this man is so focused on his dream and his loyalty to luffy would mean so much, that choosing commitment means he would respect and value his s/o for their personality, experiences and ethics. the second he decided it was the right decision, after a lot of introspection, his heart would be left into your hands for you to do as please. he's also really careful as to not push your boundaries, and always asks for consent for anything. anyone with eyes can see how much he adores you and values your existence.

being constantly protected. even though he respects your abilities, he cannot help but keeping an eye on you anywhere, at any times, even when you're not around. he's on high alert, constantly on watch. during combat, he would go rampage if someone dared to touch you, and i'm not talking about being hurt. if that were the case, zoro would not even be able to look at you (in scared of being too "softened") before destroying the enemy with pure sadism.

being kissed all the time when you're alone. this boy hates PDAs, which could be one of the reasons why his has his hand on your back so no one can really see lol. that does not mean he won't look at you with love and adoration in public, offering you a quick and genuine smile or wink when your eyes lock. but when alone, zoro reveals himself as a passionate lover. he would kiss you endlessly until your breath runs out, and would kiss you again when he's given the "go". his kisses would be long, and he would trap you in his huge arms the whole time, running his hands through your waist, hips, legs and ass. he won't say it, but he loves it when you cup his face during the kiss or run your fingers through his green hair. bonus if you grip on his shoulders during intimate moments, where he would kiss you harder and a tad rougher. with him drinking a lot, be prepared for some amusing kissing sessions where he could kiss you with his mouth full of sake (unless you're not drinking, which he would totally respect!!)

him showing off to sanji just to fuck with him. hell, he would lick your whole face in front of the chef if that could set him on fire. that would make him laugh his ass off.

having heated arguments. zoro is stubborn and can be impulsive. if he's in a cranky mood, he may raise his voice at his s/o for nothing important, but he would be feeling so sorry after that. he would shyly apologize in what feels like a whisper, but he would give you some space for a little time before doing so.

being told "i love you" when he thinks you're sleeping. zoro is not chatty, and again, you know he loves you, and he knows he does. anyone with eyes can see that. but sometimes, when the rythme of this life gets too crazy, or when he feels the need for you to hear these magic words and for him to vocalize his feelings, he would say "i love you" in the most intimate way possible, in the crook of your neck when you're sleeping, before pressing a kiss to your temple. little did he know, you heard it every single time. he would also say it during really intimate and slow make out sessions and intercourses. however, he would often thinks "i love them", at the most random times when he's looking at his s/o : seeing them eat ? shower ? dance ? reading ? he's loving them all the time. 24/7. (he just needs the courage to say it each time he thinks it, but then he would look like sanji and he can't have that)

being his. zoro won’t admit it but he loves knowing you’re his, and having the others know it as well. he is so proud of you, and proud to have such an amazing partner. and he would have no shame in saying he’s yours.

don't start me but zoro would be the type of guy to say "i'm not taking a shower unless it's with you" lol.

#one piece x reader #op x reader #opla x reader #roronoa zoro #zoro roronoa x reader #one piece imagine #one piece headcanon #zoro

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ritualtorture · 29 days ago

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I'd like to try experimenting with pain, but I'm worried my subconscious/instincts won't let me push myself as much as I'd like. do you have any tips about that, or does it come down to having a partner?

i have a fair bit to say about this! i do a lot of self-play because it's important to me to know what i'm putting my subs through, but i'm not much of a masochist, so i run into this often.

you are right, you have a survival instinct that will eventually prevent you from hurting yourself further, but with frequent and persistent training, you can overcome any survival instinct. think of the amount of effort and repetition that's needed to dull a gag reflex; that's the level we're operating on here.

before anything else, you should make sure you want to feel pain for sustainable reasons that won't secretly escalate and ruin all your relationships and derail your life, and that you're not doing it in heightened emotional states. otherwise you'll go harder and sloppier than you mean to and you'll needlessly increase your risk of permanent injury or other complications.

the ideal starting point for hurting yourself for fun and pleasure is when you're stable in your mental health, your physical health is stable, and you've had a pleasant past few days with some really chill days planned afterwards. after that, the best thing to do is just try it.

impact play is a good way to acquaint yourself with pain because it's very buildable and the pain stops when you stop hitting yourself. THIS is a very good post on how to gradually build up impact, and everything in it is applicable to self-play.

if you try one form of impact and you don't like it, try something else instead of assuming impact or pain is not for you. most people generally find they have a preference for stingy sensations (spanking, whips, canes, crops) or thuddy sensations (bats, paddles, batons, some floggers).

you don't have to buy specific kink toys to experience these sensations. my favourite thuddy impact toy is actually a metal chair leg, and for stingy toys, i fucking love anything rubber or silicone including big, thick rubber bands. not an impact toy, but honorable mention to these "wooden pen trays" from officeworks that i use as ishidaki boards:

if you do find you're not getting your fill of pain with impact, i'd focus on anything that only requires a brief moment of bravery and leaves lasting pain, or anything that gets more passively painful over time. you can do these things on their own, combine them with each other, or combine them with other forms of pain. for your consideration:

ishidaki and other kneeling tortures

predicament especially combined with stress positions

clothespins

intentional exposure to skin irritants (especially on genitals or broken skin)

cilices

acupressure spikes under clothing

heat exposure, mindful of the risk of burns

cold exposure - more cold is not always more pain, there's no need to go significantly below freezing

most of these are relatively low-risk except skin irritants. there is no antidote for most skin irritants. once you apply the irritant, you are going to feel that pain until it decides it's finished with you.

last year i got thai chilli juices on an active eczema flare-up on my hands and i was in excruciating pain for the next 16 hours. i couldn't focus on anything and i couldn't sleep. paracetamol, ibuprofen, aspirin, codeine, gabapentin all couldn't touch it. it was too much for me. i cried. be fucking careful. use tiny doses. you can always add more irritant, but you can't take away a chemical burn.

i can make a dedicated skin irritant post if anyone's interested.

now, if you're doing passive pain, the game goes from convincing your brain to let you keep hitting yourself to convincing your body to not remove yourself from the situation. you're probably relying on your hands and eyes to get you into and out of this pain, so make it inconvenient (but still possible) for you to use those parts of your body. some ideas:

cuffing your wrists behind your back

blindfolding yourself

posture collars so you can't look down

wearing mittens or socks on your hands to limit your dexterity

balancing a tray with a non-breakable cup of water on it and no real way to put it down without making a mess

sitting on your hands so they go numb

you can also make things hurt more intensely or less intensely just by changing the way you think about what's happening to you. anything i could say about this would be blatantly plagiarising the incredible fetlife user @vahavta, please attend her class on pain processing if you get the chance.

#info #final words

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anime-grimmy-art · 9 months ago

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UPDATE: NEW DEADLINE DEC 8TH

Welcome to the Finish this in your style!

In contrast to a DTIYS, where the goal is to recreate an existing piece, the FTIYS is about making a provided sketch your own.

All necessary infos are on the slides, but here a summary:

Deadline is December 1st.

(Can be extended if asked for.)

Sketches can be found here:

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/10xPkvv588FX8mNj5AdNAWT8Y0TW0KRWK?usp=sharing

There’s only 2 rules:

- It has to be the same character

- It should be obvious which sketch the finished piece is based on.

Other than that, you are allowed to work as freely as you want. Just colouring the sketch, actually finishing it, or heck, even going beyond that. You also don’t have to keep true to my art style! You can totally put your own spin on it. As long as the concept is upheld, it’s viable for entry.

Entries should either be posted with the tag #grimmyftiys (and tag me), or dm-ed to me directly. You’re also allowed to work on as many sketches as your heart desires, but mind you, all of them will be counted as one entry.

Prices:

1st place - Full Body, Full Render Character Illustration (proper lineart)

2nd place - Half Body, Simple Style Character Illustration (somewhat messy lineart)

3rd place - Bust, Flat Colour Character Illustration (coloured sketch)

Depending on the amount of entries, I also might do some sketches for honorable mentions!

I made sure to put a wide variety of sketches. I have some really rough ones, some more clean ones, some borderline lineart. Some are never seen sketches, some are sketches of stuff I’ve posted. I also included a ton of different fandoms - e.g. Undertale, Genshin, Trigun or Little Nightmares, just to name a few. I’m sure there’s something for everyone!

I hope you guys have fun with this!!!!

Also, on a side note, you can freely use these sketches for practice or just for fun, even if you DONT wanna participate. But if you do end up uploading them somewhere, do please remember to credit me, thaaaanks.

#grimmyftiys #finishthisinyourstyle #ftiys #fanart #oc #sketches #genshinimpact #littlenightmares #monsterhunter #undertale #trigun #pokemon #miscellaneous

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bloodyhellgranger · 2 months ago

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When did Spike and Buffy fall in love?

So I typed this rambling to answer a question someone posted elsewhere and thought I might as well share it here too. Again, it's not the most organized or coherent post. ----------

Spike was ATTRACTED to Buffy from the beginning. There are multiple layers to this...

He is drawn to slayers because they represent death and glory to him.

She (and other slayers) are the only ones who could give him the exhilarating fights he craves for.

She was pretty, smart, resourceful and different.

But he fell in love with her gradually throughout the series. The seeds were planted in Becoming Pt. 2 which is why Dru could see her in him (either presently or in the future) but it was mostly still attraction (Who are You when Faith was in her body, Superstar when he was still obviously fixating on her when the rest were idolizing Jonathan), even when he dreamed about them having sex. But the more he saw her, really took notice of her and saw her heart, he fell in love. (Think of Family where she stood up for Tara, think of Fool for Love where she showed vulnerability about her mother, and everything adding up for him even the fact that she took pity and helped him in S4 etc). So I can't pinpoint a moment but it was in the first half of S5 when he actually fell in love.

Buffy is even harder to pinpoint because she represses her feelings by nature and doesn't share them a lot. But I think there was lowkey attraction from the beginning, even just in the recognition that he was different from every villain she's ever encountered. She complained about how her enemies couldn't appreciate her quips and puns but here was Spike, bantering with her back and forth with a sexually charged energy. There was an unconscious acknowledgement of his difference and significance - she seemed to implicitly trust him in a lot of matters, even when it didn't make sense. For Buffy's feelings we have to read a lot of subtext and accept that we had little insight to her REAL thoughts and feelings.

She let him go in the Bronze alleyway.

She offered to fight without weapons - which was pretty insane, since she couldn't kill him without one. But she actually dropped her weapon when he did.

In Lie to Me she knew Dru meant everything to him even with the little information she had of their relationship. She put all her eggs in one basket by threatening her. And she was right, he let everyone go to save Dru. And she honored their deal and didn't dust Dru.

In Becoming Pt. 2, she kept eyeing him up. Partly to figure out his motives but also because she was seeing him differently. You can see her trust again when she communicated with him with her eyes when Joyce arrived, and how she just trusted him not to out her to her mother and go along with her excuse. And how she trusted him to be with Joyce in the other room. Again, these instances of trust are huge - he was unchipped and known to be evil. So there was something in him that made her regard and treat him differently than other villains.

Lovers Walk - they fought together, bickered and had more chemistry even when Angel was there. He could also read her like a book and called them out for hiding their feelings. And then, one of the first instances of Buffy realizing Spike could see through her, she includes him in her speech to Angel and mentions she could hide from everyone except herself and Spike.

It's telling that the next time he shows up, they act like awkward exes and sized each other's dates up and again, bickered. Even Parker was confused and thought they were exes. Again Spike showed he had the uncanny ability to read her, and attacked her with words that really hurt.

Season 4 can be summed up by Buffy again helping Spike out and not killing him over and over. And flirting with him. And realizing they had chemistry when they were under the spell. Notice how in Superstar you could also see her attraction when Spike was carressing her face. Yes, they were under a spell but the spell didn't make her attracted to Spike.

And then there's Season 5 where she showed time and time again that she trusted him even when she kept saying she didn't. How many times did she approach him for help and trust him with her family? Every time Spike did something unexpected it gradually added to whatever trust and positive feelings she had that she wouldn't admit. When she and Riley argued about his strength and how she wanted someone strong, she brought up SPIKE of all people and said if she wanted someone Superpowered she would date Spike (newsflash: she did want someone like that lol). She allowed him to comfort her in Fool for Love. She could have eventually staked him for bringing a shotgun and obviously planning to shoot her. In the same episode when she told him she would NEVER trust him, she took his mother and sister to him for protection and didn't even offer money - she just KNEW he would keep them safe. He challenged her in a lot of ways too and called her out when she kept using him as a punching bag when she was really angry about herself - like when Dawn went to him in Blood Ties and they found out she was the key, and she was angry at him but realized he was right. And the fact that Spike trying to kill her multiple times did not get him disinvited from her house for YEARS but the moment she found out he was in love with her, it wigged her out to the point that she finally did it. When he allowed himself to be tortured for her and her sister, she KISSED him. It was instinct. It was something her body and heart told her to do. When earlier that episode she was afraid she couldn't feel anything anymore, he TOUCHED her heart enough to get that reaction. And then started really leaning on him and trusting him more after that, and he was the one she asked to protect Dawn in the finale because she knew he would die trying. So I'd say her feelings really started in Intervention but she was already attracted and drawn to him prior to that.

But love.. is even more difficult to pinpoint lol. He made her feel alive in S6 despite the toxicity of their relationship. She kept denying she loved him but was hurt and jealous when he was with other women. She was even affected when she found out he left town. Again it's just very complicated because even if she did love him, she couldn't allow herself to because of who he was and because she was depressed and couldn't really love and didn't want to be loved.

So I'd say she tried not to love him in S6 but was starting to and she actually allowed herself to love him in S7 which you can see in her actions.

#spuffy #spike btvs #spike #buffy summers #buffy #buffy btvs #spike and buffy #btvs #buffy the vampire slayer #i'll probably write a more comprehensive post in the future with more of a breakdown but this is all my energy will allow now

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vynxwave · 4 months ago

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Spoilers for my fave part of Skybound Transformers #18 under the cut

With me being a MegaSound enjoyer, I GOTTA talk about their moment in #18.

Also, before we get into that — honorable mention to me in December where I said:

I actually had made this comment specifically because I noticed that in Skybound Transformers the Transformers were notably very friendly/touchy with each other, as inspired by the G1 cartoon, and that Soundwave appeared a Megatron loyalist.

...NONETHELESS I'M STILL SO SURPRISED IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED.

One thing that surprised me is that Megatron is very level-headed and calm — instead of immediately angrily dealing with Starscream, he opts to repair Ravage.

Looking back, this Megatron seems to have some quirky abilities in general... such as in the Energon Universe Special 2024 where he just reconnects his arm. I wonder if we'll get an explanation for his special abilities in #19?

Anyways, onto the pages/panels that have been etched into my brain:

I'M SO UNWELL ABOUT THEM. I LOVE THIS SO MUCH.

As someone who knows a thing or two about them... their relationship has never been portrayed quite like this before, and I'm so happy for this!!!

One thing I have absolutely yearned to see in their relationship is this explicit recognition of one another — it never made sense to me why it was something that always remained largely unspoken between them when oftentimes a large part of Soundwave's character is being a Megatron loyalist. I'm so glad to see his loyalty being affirmed and responded to in such a meaningful way.

Here we see Megatron value Ravage as well as recognize what he is to Soundwave. I'm quite glad they all have a cohesive dynamic between each other like this.

i can't get over soundwave kneeling and saying "my master" omfg. I CAN'T GET OVER IT....

Back in #7 we saw the Decepticons kneeling for Soundwave after he assumed Decepticon leadership and they chanted his name. Soundwave kneeling, but also holding onto Megatron's extended hand/finger feels far more personal and even reverent — especially with the "faithful servant" and "my master" lines.

I could talk about what this contributes to what the Decepticons are being built up as, but I'll save a Skybound Decepticon analysis post for when #19 is out xD.

^ It's very interesting how "master" is used instead of the more typical "lord".

I'm super loving Skybound Megatron so far, he's so intriguing and such a cool interpretation of Megatron. I also love looking back and seeing Megatron's ideological influence on Soundwave's ideals/leadership.

Megatron having serious damage but still maintaining every ounce of his evil threat and danger is something I looove.

Prior to Skybound, IDW Transformers vs. G.I. Joe (2014) explicitly referred to Soundwave as the cassettes' father. I didn't actually read this comic, save for issue #10's prose story at the back "Black Cybertron" and I was quite surprised... it's definitely meant to be read in context with the all prior issues LOL.

It is curious how it appears that Frenzy/Rumble aren't included in said family in Skybound?

Megatron calling Ravage "small thing" reminded me of him calling the father he spared in the Energon Universe Special 2024 the same thing xD.

...I forgot to explain yesterday I recommended reading the Void Rivals comic because of the Transformers #19 cover xD — in Void Rivals the Transformers' enslavement by the Quintessons origin (the "Age of Wrath") is detailed. Megatron alluded to this origin in — you guessed it — the Energon Universe Special 2024.

next TF vol (4) is called "Conquer and Control" which I'm excited for xD im hoping so hard for continued good moments between megatron and soundwave

#skybound spoilers #transformers skybound spoilers #skybound tf spoilers #megatron #soundwave #megasound #vynx.txt

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mihii-i · 11 months ago

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hiiii!!!! i’ve been your follower for a while now and i really like your works:> you’re one of my fav authors atm and i always find myself giggling and kicking my feet everytime you post something💞 can i also request a one shot with service top robin (hsr) x power bottom afab!reader? you don’t have to respond if you dont want to! i just wanted to try💞

my angel.

Pairings: robin x fem!reader

CW: nsfw, female reader, afab reader, power bottom reader, service top robin, sesbian lex hwhehhdhdeh, cunnilingus, jealousy mention, hair pulling, fingering, marking, GIRLS KISSING WOAH, wlw, petnames (love, angel), that pussy FIREEE DAMN, the way I wanna be reader so bad, wrote this with no tea so it might be bad :(, not proofread.

A/N: IM SCREAMING THATS ACTUALLY SO SWEET ILY IM SO HONORED TO BE CONSIDERED ONE OF YOUR FAVORITE AUTHORS YAY also everyone requesting the hsr characters im absolutely obsessed with do yall know something or am i just not slick about being obsessed with acheron and robin🕯️

“Is this alright?”

Robin’s sweet voice muffled against your soaked cunt, tongue lulled out as her emerald eyes flickered up at your arched form. Hands planted behind your back, you lowered your head to gaze upon your halovian girlfriend, whispering out a satisfied hum before threading your fingers through her hair.

“Mhm. Just like that.” You whispered, hushed voice attempting to bite back a moan from leaving you. Each swipe of her tongue massaging your clit elicited a pleased sigh spilling from your feverish lips, repeated motions of her tongue being engulfed by your hot walls driving you mad as your hips rolled up to meet her movements. Her movements only ignited a flame of desire within you—the desire to have Robin all to yourself.

The fact that your girlfriend was a famous idol always ate at your mind, especially whenever you could only imagine the filth that some fans of her mutter behind her back. Every quick glance cast at her by a random in her crowd never failed to make you tense up, your blood boiling especially whenever you saw one of them have evidently perverse intentions. However, Robin never failed to calm you down, reassuring you however she could. Including the way she was devouring you like a woman starved being one of them.

Her soft moans vibrated against your pussy, causing euphoric shocks to pulse throughout your quivering body as you threw your head back with a whine. Robin cocked her head to the side to angle herself perfectly against your cunt, fingers tightening into the supple flesh of your thighs as she parted them and allowed her tongue to flick against your heat.

“Just..like that..” you moaned out, balling your hand into a fist as it remained tangled in her lavender-tinted pale hair, earning a brief gasp from Robin. All of a sudden, she seemed to pull away from your cunt, leaving you utterly confused—and kind of empty as her head raised up to to meet yours, making your eyes widen a little upon coming nose to nose with her. Robin angled her head slightly, eyes fluttering shut as her lips locked with yours.

The velvety comfort of her smooth lips pressed onto yours, mixed with your own slick coating tongue made you nearly melt into her touch, an intense desire burning against your flushed skin. Your eyes abruptly shot open, grip on her hair tightening as you felt her soft fingers run along your slit in slow, tantalizing motions, causing you to choke back a lewd noise that threatened to spill out against her lips.

Pulling away, Robin’s eyes trailed down to your exposed neck, her heavy pants being cut short as her teeth pressed against the open spot. Your mind blanked as her fingers continued curling inside you, breaths coming out in quick gasps and shallow pants as your walls clenched around her fingers rhythmically moving inside you.

You barely drawled out a breathy laugh, moving your hands to rest against Robin’s shoulders, as the dim lighting above you grew blurry, and the satin sheets soaked with your juices. You basked in the pleasure of her fingers fucking you so well, and her bare body towered over you with her lips ghosting your throat.

“Ah- Robin, love…move a bit lower for me, would you?” You gasped, coaxing her shoulders downward, and signaling her to plant kisses all over your body.

Red marks bloomed against your skin with every hickey Robin imprinted onto your neck. Her groans filled the room each time she felt you clench around her digits, and saw the sight of your back arched up with your head thrown back in ecstasy. The way her kisses reverbated against your sensitive flesh only drove you over the edge, a familiar heat building up in your lower abdomen with each thrust of her fingers.

“Don’t keep me waiting, my angel.” You chuckled, only replacing it with another moan as she complied with your erotic command. Your eyes only squeezed shut as her movements grew rougher, fucking you into the sheets like you asked as you fisted the sheets between your free hand to ground yourself.

You briefly shot open one eye to look down at your girlfriend, her gaze meeting yours once more with heavy lidded eyes as she resumed her movements.

“No need to get jealous. I’ll give you whatever you need. I’ll reassure you as much as I can. You know that you’re the only woman for me.”

Her words ripped a whorish cry out of your throat as your head fell back and sank into the plush pillows, your orgasm washing over you and coating Robin’s fingers still buried in you.

Once you recovered from your high, you only smiled as she found her way beside you, snaking an arm around your torso protectively and kissing the back of your neck. You giggled at the ticklish sensation of her lips, turning around to press your nose to hers. All she wanted to do was make you happy, make you feel loved in any way possible.

And you would do the same just for her.

A/N: now playing: kehlani - jordan adetunji

sorry if it wasn’t up to par I didn’t have any tea 💔

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