#also if you want to know which specifically ive had ideas for that im not writing.... mind wipe my beloved

[weirdlizard26]

so bizarre to me that my love language is apparently recording music for people. how did this even happen

[heartyearning]

the way i live my life is LIDORALLY just like doing whatever’s gonna make my friends have a laff. have a good chuckle. no matter how stupid the thing is or how silly it’s gonna make me look to other ppl if it makes them do a little snort come hell or high water i will do that thing

[pepprs]

ok um. literally fucking pain and suffering. mutuals i need ur advice vote now on your phones 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[dragcnbreak]

AHHH THE AGE REGRESSION ONES R SO CUTE I NEED MORE!!!!! maybe one where reader is having like a breakdown/ptsd flashback which results in them regressing involuntarily and mike comforts them? could be headcanons or a fic idrc :3

IM SO GLAD PEOPLE GET THE CG MIKE VISION… here is my attempt at writing something along those lines!!! I hope u enjoy nonnie <3

◞♡࿐

The Schmidt household was practically a second home to you. You crashed on the couch more often than not and even had a drawer full of your things in Mike’s room for easy access. Your living situation was less than ideal and you felt more comfortable with Mike and Abby than anyone else so it just worked out.

That’s how you found yourself outside their door one morning, knowing it would be just Mike at the house as Abby had already left for school. You used your key and offered a shaky smile to the sleepy man on the couch. “Hey.” He says at first, taking a few seconds to look up at you. When he finally does, his eyes widen at the tears running down your cheeks and he rushes towards you.

“What’s wrong, honey?” Mike asks, using his thumb to wipe under your eyes. You don’t answer but instead, you start to sob loudly. He’s definitely awake now, all his attention on you. He helps you the best he can to the couch so you can sit down. The second he sits down with you, you fling yourself into his arms and continue your breakdown.

Mike is quick to hold you, rubbing your back softly and whispering soothing things like “it’ll be okay” and “I’ve got you”. It helps more than he knows and the both of you sit there for what seems like hours.

When you begin to quiet down, you detach yourself from him and rub at your eyes. “Are you feeling any better?” Mike asks you and you nod lazily, a sudden tiredness washing over you. “T’ank you, Mikey.” The slurring and the nickname alerts Mike to the fact that sometime during your crying session, you slipped into littlespace.

You didn’t age regress too often, specifically around Abby. But Mike was always more than happy to take care of you when you did, especially when you were sad. “Of course, baby,” he uses his favorite nickname for you when you’re in that headspace, “how about we get you something to eat and drink and then you go take a nap?” He continues.

You nod again, “m’kay.” The idea of eating doesn’t sound too bad and you know you need to stay hydrated, even more so after crying. Mike grabs the television remote and turns on Abby’s favorite channel with all the cartoons. He gives you a kiss on your forehead and then hurries to the kitchen.

He and Abby had just had breakfast so he heats up the remaining pancakes and bacon, periodically checking on you. He slathers the pancakes with butter like he knows you like it and also cuts them up. Mike then delivers them to you on a plate.

You lighten up a bit at the food, starting to dig in as he goes to get you a glass of water. He comes back and sets it on the table in front of you. Before too long, you’ve finished your food and water and are back rubbing your eyes tiredly again.

“How about that nap?” Mike offers with a knowing smile. You nod and make grabby hands, indicating you want to be picked up. The man isn’t the most built but he works out enough to easily pick you up, knowing how much you like it when he does. You wrap your arms around his neck while he holds your thighs not too tight.

In a few seconds, you’re in Mike’s room and he deposits you carefully on his bed. He tucks you in so you’re nice and safe and comfortable. He’s about to turn away when you stop him. “Can we cuddle, please?” You ask and he already knows he’s not going to say no. He hums and slips into the bed, fortunately already in comfortable wear.

In the bed, you turn to face the wall opposite the door and Mike catches on, wrapping you up in his arms. Before he knows it, you and him fall asleep even with the sun peeking through the blinds at you both.

◞♡࿐

this was kinda therapeutic to write because ive been going through a tough time myself :( tysm for the request <3

[chuuwtoy]

ive noticed that a lot of people seem to misunderstand S.T.A.R.S era wesker. i see it in fanfiction a lot where he's a complete and utter emotionless hardass.

i dont think this was the case in canon. working as a captain in a unit akin to SWAT you have to be tough, stern, and the like, but albert also needed to gain the trust of his team - and being unapproachable and feared is not the way to go, and he knows that.

every iteration of wesker is pretty different from each other. peter jessop's version is the one im going to be talking about since that version of wesker is who we see in RE remaster.

wesker is actually quite informal with his alpha team members, referring to them by their first names a number of times, and they don't use "sir" or "captain" on him at all. his tone, and language also give off major chill vibes (although this is probably because his plans are coming into fruition) he's a bit soft-spoken and doesnt sound nearly as sophisticated as he does in most fanfiction.

when i first became obsessed with resident evil i remember analyzing everything in the S.T.A.R.S office, it didnt stand out to me before but there were dart boards, CDs, chris' guitar, etc ... i bet they had more fun in that office than we thought. but what really gets me is that wesker must've allowed them to bring this stuff in (which is really funny because i'm imagining him raising eyebrows at chris bringing in this huge guitar one morning).

he trained members of the alpha team (and maybe bravo team too?) not only because thats his job but because he needed that combat data as well. though, i'd argue that sending people that were ill-prepared is sorta dumb and a waste. rebecca wasnt great at physical combat and brad was... a chicken, you'd think he'd work harder to have them become better but nope. he probably gave S.T.A.R.S leeway a bunch of times.

of course, i think the idea of him being a bit mean and an asshole to atleast one specific person in S.T.A.R.S is enthralling- whether it be chris, jill, a self-insert or whatever! also this wasnt made to bash any headcanons, do what you want! it's all fictional stuff anyway ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧ just thought i'd share my incoherent thoughts (๑>؂•̀๑)

[choccy-milky]

OKAY HEAR ME OUT CHOCCY SEB GIVES CLORA A SNAKE RING?!?!

Soooooo rereading the fic and I’m back to chapter 33, and it totally popped into my head that they are IN THE VICTORIAN ERA and do ya know what was super popular after the engagement ring that Queen Victoria was given by Prince Albert? A SNAKE RING

AND IF THAT AINT SEB TREATING CLORA LIKE THE QUEEN SHE IS THEN I DONT KNOW WHAT IS 😭💙💚✨

Thank you for coming to my ted talk 🫣😂

LMFAOO YESS TRUST ME, IVE SEEN THIS AFTER DOING MY OWN RESEARCH ABOUT VICTORIAN RINGS, ITS SO PERFECT!! AND THE FACT THAT ITS GREEN TOO LMAO, prince albert was a possessive slytherin confirmed!!🤪 but yea ill DEFS be incorporating a snake into the final design of cloras ring HAHA. i basically HAVE to...yknow, for period accuracy 🥰

WOO YAY im glad i could inspire you to start writing!!!🙏and i get it, writing fanfic is defs self indulgent and for ourselves first and foremost, but obvs nobody wants to release their work into the void😩 as for how my own fic got popular, one of the main things is defs timing. i published the first chap basically within the first week of the game being out (it came out on the 10th and my chap was on the 18th) so it was there right at the peak/start of the fandom. but i also dont wanna attribute it all to timing BAHHA cuz i think im a pretty good writer and that helps....my fic also didnt get popular right away, but i was consistently posting every single week + eventually started adding art every single week, and was just really dedicated to not only writing but also drawing art for it (which is also obvs another huge factor/probs the biggest factor). ive had so many ppl tell me they started reading my fic bc they saw my art on pinterest or something LOL, and some ppl have even read it fandom-blind bc they were into the seb/clora dynamic??? which is another point actually. i always joke about how i love my cliches and good girl+bad boy dynamics, and that im unashamed about loving them LOL, but also...they're cliches for a reason!!! lots of us eat that shit up!!!😤so i think thats defs another factor, vs if my fic was a bit more niche and avant garde LOL the fandom is also (understandably) a lot slower than it was at the beginning of the year so itll be harder in general, but maybe you could commission art to go with your fanfic? ive seen a lot of other HL fanfic writers do it, and i think it defs helps to draw attention! GOOD LUCK and i hope you keep writing!!!🫡💖💖💖🙌

huh??? go with the tide pods instead, THAT shit looks bussin😩😩

AWW TYY😭😭I LOVE THAT HAHAH AND IM GLAD U THINK SO💖💖 my friend also asked me this question after seeing my recent ask, and i STILL have no idea what i would have named it instead LMAOO, thats how bad i am at naming things. even a year later im like bruh idk!!! clora and sebs bizarre adventures??? i guess id probs make it something light/dark themed in retrospect, or something more specific to the ancient magic, but i still have no idea what LOL

[rewritingcanon]

what do u think of the portrayal of harry and ginny in the cursed child (i feel like it's so out of character, especially for harry) also that he works at the ministry and that ginny gave up her quidditch career (same goes for harry)

alright ive had this in my inbox for so long because i wanted to do this ask justice so i really hope that anon is still around to read this. in saying that harry was ‘out of character’ in hpcc, i assume you’re talking about how he was a bad/flawed father, as MANY fans have argued the same. so i will address that first and then i will talk about ginny and hinny’s careers.

disclaimer: when i say “you” im not talking specifically about anon but about fandom.

harry potter vs fatherhood

harry’s whole life resolved around being the chosen one and the prophesied saviour of the wizarding world. it was either being The Hero or being the unwanted, abused and scorned freak living with the dursleys. when thats your home life, then you tend to cling on to anything that is an escape from that— and in harry’s experience that was hogwarts.

if you really think about it, hogwarts was very nasty to harry as well. he was always getting picked on or bullied or in some life threatening danger that he got blamed for half of the time— but because it was better than living with the dursleys, his mind idolised it as a safe haven.

harry also reflects this idolising behaviour onto parental figures, especially paternal figures. he doesnt actually know his parents, only has an ideal of them in his head that was constructed as a coping mechanism to the abuse and neglect he went through at home. he projects The Perfect Father onto every one of his paternal figures (i think the only exception to this is arthur but i mayyy be wrong)— sirius and dumbledore are the biggest ones that come to mind, even though sirius only knew him for two years, and dumbledore would manipulate and use harry for the betterment of the world, which is unlike a parent who would put their child’s needs first (harry did not recognise these issues at length at the time as he was used to the idea of self sacrifice and probs understood that it came with the territory of being The Hero). harry even projected his father onto himself in PoA and nearly died from it.

in saying this, its reasonable to argue that there’s a disconnect with harry and the idea of what a good father actually is. this is challenged in the books itself (with SWM, harry seeing that james was not the Perfect Man he built up in his head), but this is challenged the most in the cursed child.

throughout the play, harry acts as the personified ideal he grew up with. easygoing, confident, wise— when in reality he is the opposite of those attributes and albus can see right through it (ginny says this to harry in the play, i would find the line but alas, im on the train rn). hes not easygoing or confident— he’s fearful that he doesn’t know what hes doing or how to be a father, and hes scared not knowing makes him a bad father. hes acted out in fear multiple times— the biggest moment is when he bans albus from seeing scorpius to keep him ‘safe.’ he has constant nightmares about his trauma as a child when living with the dursleys and not having the stability or love he craved. his ‘wise’ advice is not applicable to his children because he is harry potter, The Hero, and they are just normal kids. this is why albus and harry get on each others nerves so badly— because they are constantly stomping on each others sore spots by accident. albus doesn’t appreciate the facade that harry tries to uphold, and harry doesn’t understand why— because he’s projecting that ideal onto all of his kids, and if it works for james and lily (presumably), why doesn’t it work for albus? harry would’ve done anything for a father figure like himself!! there must be something wrong with albus!! (🙄)

now The Blanket SceneTM is very controversial and pissed off a lot of longtime fans into denouncing the entire play as canon. ive talked about it at length and since theres more to discuss in this post, i will shorten it down as best i can for you:

as a way of bonding, harry tries to give his precious blanket to albus. he believes albus may be more like him and may be able to understand the sacredness of the present unlike his siblings.

unknowingly, harry is still projecting his ideals onto albus. the blanket is only so extremely precious to him because it represents his parents, who he still views in an idolised light. therefore the blanket is the ideal.

albus scorns this ideal so he scorns the gift. however, because hes a confused and possibly depressed fourteen year old, he doesn’t communicate the rejection of this in a healthy way and basically insults the blanket by calling it old and mouldy and comparing it to james and lily’s presents, which outwardly could make him seem like a brat.

by attacking the blanket, he attacks harry’s parents and the ideal. and harry is very sensitive about this

albus then accidentally triggers very central fears surrounding being an orphan and being a father when he says “i wish you werent my dad”

harrys first thought is that albus wants him dead. at this point, hes stopped listening to albus trying to explain himself as he’s already triggered, so he’s acting in complete defence when he responds “sometimes i wish you werent my son”

this was said with the intention to hurt albus, it was a mindless act with one goal. saying this is out of character for harry is ridiculous, because he’s done the exact same thing in the books multiple times to the people he loves.

another important note: these characters trigger each other accidentally. the intent to connect is there, but there are deep seated issues on harry’s side that was never confronted leading to these issues. and as albus is a young angsty teen who does get bullied and is a little self-centred (again, very normal for a 14yo), he can’t really communicate these issues to harry effectively (harry being dismissive of the bullying (that he believes is normal for hogwarts students) albus goes through doesn’t help the situation either), leaving harry stumbling in the dark and further emboldening that The Perfect Father he imagined as a child may not exist.

ok that wasnt very economical but anyways! those are the issues! what happens next is harry spiralling and confirming those fears, being forced to confront them and deal with them, and then the steps toward healing his relationship with albus.

im not defending how harry treated albus (dismissing his bullying, lashing out, the enmeshment abuse) but offering insight and trying to explain that he was certainly in-character. i think people simply had an emotional reaction to seeing their loved character being very realistically flawed, and decided they didnt like it without doing much analysis as to why harry was acting the way he was. trauma is very complex, and theres no expiry date for it if you simply refuse to confront it or heal.

a lot of harry’s journey with interrogating the Perfect Father concept was to confront and acknowledge his inner child. he has to recognise his childhood for the childhood it was without the flashy titles or impressed ideals. the confrontation with dumbledore is the pinnacle of it— harry idolised dumbledore as a central father figure, and he realised when confronting the portrait that his relationship with dumbledore was much more complex and nuanced than he originally thought. suddenly dumbledore ceases to be an ideal, and harry sees him for the man that he was: conflicted, more uncertain in his own choices than he let on, heartbroken and self-sabotaging.

when harry presents himself at the end of the play to albus, he presents himself as human— an escapist, unsure in his decisions, insecure, and scared of the dark, small spaces and pigeons. and albus appreciates the flawed, real version of harry. those expectations and ideals that albus struggled to uphold in the face of harry’s projecting simply disappear, and he finally feels like he can adequately be harry’s son just by being.

another less obvious moment that shows this, is how harry and delphi mirror each other. delphi is the more extreme version of this— she is completely deluded in her worship for a father she never knew, so desperate for the love and respect shes built up in her mind that she’s dedicated her life to it and feels empty without the ideal to go off of. its why harry defends her when albus asks him why they shouldn’t just kill her— because hes the only one who understands the pain of being an orphan, living in an abusive household, dreams of ‘what ifs’ and what it can do to a person.

whats important to take away is that harry and albus love each other immensely, which is why they are able to turn over a new leaf at the end. it speaks of incredible strength on albus’ half, and i really want to stress that albus LOVES harry, because i see so much content about him straight up butchering or slandering harry when that is sooo not them!! if albus saw the way some of yall were misinterpreting his relationship with his dad he’d be livid. whether or not you would do the same in forgiving harry is irrelevant— albus has always wanted to have a good relationship with harry and the same goes both ways. people hurt each other, sometimes egregiously so, but when one promises change and is serious about it, than chances are there will be change. this is especially so in the case of family.

ginny weasley vs age

what is paradoxical is how self-centred harry is, despite also being very willing to sacrifice himself for other people. albus possesses a self-centredness similar to him. harry is so caught up in his own world and comparing it to albus’ situation, and vice versa. ginny is normally the middle man who can see both harry and albus for what they are and the individual worlds they inhabit, and tries to communicate effectively between them. the play mostly revolves around harry and albus, so what i’ll have to say for her will not be as in-depth.

short answer: ginny matured with age. she is probably the most mature character alongside draco, although draco does let his emotions get in the way at times (funnily enough i think this is why ginny and draco get along so well in the cursed child and are able to recognise each other for who they are). she was very brash and courageous and wonderfully chaotic in the books, but she was also blunt and impatient, which is not something thats presented in the cursed child. instead, she is VERY patient and communicates extremely well, being able to navigate both harry and albus without prodding their weak spots like they do to each other.

she offers her own experiences to albus as her own experiences, not projecting them onto him as an unequivocal truth. this can be seen in how she opens up to him about how she was exploited by tom riddle, and she lets albus draw his own comparisons to himself and delphi without pushing his experiences into a box.

her relationship with harry is interesting, because she is the only one who sees him for him and the only one that harry’s not bothered by when she makes honest judgments on his actions. he’s only okay with her seeing him for the flawed man he is. she doesn’t make him feel defensive, nor does she make him feel demonised for not knowing how to parent albus, or for messing up with him (though she does call him out when he is in the wrong, something her younger self would be quick to do too). one of the most heart wrenching scenes is when ginny blows up at harry and really screams at him about albus being missing and him being self-centred about it, making it out to be about himself and his issues surrounding fatherhood. despite this, harry does not get defensive— which shows that he trusts even her negative judgments of him because she knows him so well (very very similar to the library scene with scorpius screaming at albus over his self-centeredness as well btw).

she still possesses key qualities from her younger self, she’s just ironed out the rougher ones as she’s grown— she’s still impossibly brave, fiercely loyal, extremely devoted to those she loves and also very logical. you can tell harry and albus are more emotional than she is, which is part of the reason why she is able to construct her points so effectively. she puts her logical thinking to good use in emotional situations. i think people are forgetting that people aren’t typically going to be the same as who they were as teenagers.

why has ginny been able to grow so much in comparison to harry? because she’s recognised what she went through as a teenager and made peace with it. you can see it in the way she freely offers her own experiences about it. she’s been able to build on top of what she went through in a healthy way, and was able to experience real, healthy change. and she is so much wiser and kinder for it.

hinny vs their careers

first i’ll talk about harry because i think i have more stuff to go off of with him.

we’ve already established that hes The Hero first and foremost. after he fulfilled the prophecy and saved the world i dont think its such a stretch to argue that he may have needed another similar purpose to latch onto, and that being an auror granted him that. quidditch was fun for him, but it couldn’t give him the same purchase that being an auror could. heroes dont play quidditch, they save the world. the same could be said for neville and ron, who were also aurors at first. was it the healthiest road to go down for harry? i dont think so, but considering his characterisation in the cursed child, i think it works. ron ended up quitting to be a father, neville ended up quitting to focus on his real passion (herbology), and harry continued to cling onto The Hero image he’s used to presenting. yes, the ministry was impossibly corrupt and worked against him in his youth, but to harry that could’ve served as more of a reason to change the institution from the inside. this, i imagine, was most definitely the case with hermione, who was always an idealist.

that being said, i don’t think continuing being an auror is such a great idea post-hpcc. he at least needs a break in order to continue his job in a healthy manner and not misconstrue his identity with it.

in terms of ginny, i don’t believe she’d still be playing quidditch in her 40s. if you think about real athletes, very few of them continue playing professionally in their 40s (i think the average age is 34 but i may be wrong), especially after birthing three kids. we dont know much about her retirement, but there are many reasons one can assume ginny retired for, kids and/or age being the most reasonable deduction. its not so much a question of characterisation but more about the reality of having to give up your passion earlier than most if its sports.

despite retiring, its clear ginny is still very passionate about quidditch as shes still working within the field, just not playing the sport professionally anymore.

[megamindsecretlair]

WIP Wednesday

Thank you for the tag @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin , im never sure if ppl look forward to whats upcoming from me, but these keep me honest 🤣😭

Step one: Post snippets of the fics you're working on (can be a summary if there's no snippet)

Step two: put them in a poll and let people vote on which one you should work on, then prioritize the one with the most votes.

Step three: Ask me about my WIPs! Don't be shy, I love talking about my fics! We don't create or share in a void, we want to hear from you lovelies!

Well, Mega, what can we look forward to 👀

1) Beauty and the Beast Inspired Stunna: I have severe Yahya Abdul Mateen II brainrot and baby, 🥲 the way I want to write literally everything for him. This will be a precursor to a novella I wanna write with original characters and lots more action, but Id love extra feedback for it. It will have vampires, toxic staff, and naughty bits.

2) Mea Culpa: I have been debating how much time I wanna dedicate to rewriting that monstrosity of a movie 🤭 okay, thats not fair. The idea was there, the execution wasn't because TP wouldnt know what's sexy if it slapped him in his face. Who am I fooling? I won't be satisfied until I write the whole thing and satisfy my brain. So yeah, prepare for a rewrite according to what I would've done. Think corruption kink, think court drama, think Zyair being the toxic mess we know and love.

3) Mob Boss Tyrone: I feel like ive been teasing this for years 🥲😭🤣 and thats because the ask was specifically for a one shot and I plotted out 7 parts 🤭🤣 at this point, yall know how I am. I tried to conform to short fics for my sanity and I just cant 🤷🏽‍♀️ some ideas require one part, some require several. It will include hella angst, hella smut, hella toxcity, but at the end of the day, hes always going to love his baby girl. I also think im going to switch it to Fontaine chuz thats a prettier/grittier name and would suit the story better.

4) A Watchmen fic for Cal (Yahya): lissen, ive finally went back to finish Watchmen. Not because it was a bad show, but because it requires 100% of my focus and I aint had it. But for Yahya? Ill make the time. I feel like that is 100% a soft dom and I just wanna be his cute lil princess, sue me 🤷🏽‍♀️ I love a man I can't tell what to do 🤣

Theres more but for the sake of brevity, Ill keep it at the 4 most occupying my brain at the moment. Soooo, which one yall want first? And yes 🥲 im aware of how many series I need to update 🥲

No pressure tags: @nerdieforpedro @harmshake @notapradagurl7 @ellethespaceunicorn @miyuhpapayuh

[marcmorrigan]

finally delivering on the princess tutu headshots i promised... love these dysfunctional teens 🩰💖💕

LOTS of notes about headcanons/design choices under the cut! like. a lot. dont say i didnt warn you

starting with my specialest guy fakir:

i had a suuuper clear vision for fakir, and i couldnt be happier with how he turned out, he looks exactly how i imagine him! trying to translate his Bird-Shaped Hair into my style gave me SERIOUS homestuck flashbacks. my affinity for knights with Problems knows no bounds...

adding the hyperpigmentation around his eyes and his acne scars is what really solidified this for me-- i put those in and was like oh!!! there you are!!! my boy!!! and you can tell because i gave him acne scars + thick eyebrows that he IS my boy... there are very clear trends among my headcanons for my faves lol. big noses, thick eyebrows, skin imperfections, heavy eyebags, long dark hair... and fakir truly has it all 😤 he is so Ideal Character Design to me

i think fakir is actually pretty self-conscious about his appearance tho! we see characters like pike and lilie say hes handsome to ahiru, but i dont know how often he actually hears that? and im sure its hard not to compare himself to mytho, who is straight out of a fairy tale; being a regular teenager dealing with regular teen body stuff is hard enough without your roommate being a magically beautiful eternally youthful storybook hero. i think he probably internalises more that people see him as scary and angry, and that the girls who do have crushes on him always frame it in contrast to mytho, who is Good and Kind and Handsome, implying (or sometimes outright stating!) that fakir is Bad and Mean and... Well...

fakir is very sensitive but quiet about it, so i think its a very private point of self-consciousness. i think he puts a lot of semi-secret effort into his appearance; canonically he has a lot of very funny and clearly customised clothing, and he chooses to keep his hair long and in a very particular style (i have a whole breakdown in my mind of how he achieves that style and it involves a surprising amount of pins and an unsurprising fuckton of teasing. i think his hair is a little fried from heat damage!), and i think that probably extends to other things, too, like manicuring his eyebrows and doing a lot of very Teenage Skincare that doesnt actually help his acne much lol. i think he probably has a lot of self-injurious habits and BFRBs like skin picking and chewing, mostly at his acne and around his nails (both of which he hates, because he knows he shouldnt but does it anyway). i think if he does it enough that theres noticeable evidence it feels, like, world-ending for him, ESPECIALLY if anyone asks what happened lol. do not perceive him except in the very specific ways and contexts he approves of THANKS

on to the narratives favorite princess, mytho:

again, i had a pretty clear idea of the vibe i wanted mytho to have going into this-- i want him to have, like, extreme prince charming vibes, very Classically Handsome without necessarily being 'conventional.' i thought a lot about 'the happy prince' story while i was working on this, and really wanted him to look like a cross between how the prince statue looks in my head and a porcelain doll. and also a cross between jonny brown and brigitte bardot? lots of very direct influences for him lol. so! lots of gold tones, gemmy eye color, cute little tooth gap, quivering wide-eyed thousand-yard-stare doe eyes and big ol dolly anime lashes, which were the very last thing i added because i was NERVOUS about pulling those off lol. they turned out cute tho! ive only done a handful of pieces for this series and i can already tell princess tutu is gonna make me up my lash drawing game considerably, these kids all look like they blink and cause a hurricane from the gale force wind of their falsies

also wait i lied the very last thing i did was add his freckles/beauty marks because he needed that little extra oomph and those were It. i think he probably has some on his hands/wrists too 💕

i was a little unsure if my idea for his hair would translate with this flat-color approach but im pretty happy with it! its supposed to be afrotextured hair (somewhere between 3b and 4c i think? wide range of potential i knowww but im still kind of hammering out my headcanons okay, this is exploratory lol) thats been rolled and finger-styled into his little feather shapes. i think loose, chunky twists would be another fun way to interpret his hair and twists are one of my fave styles to draw do i might draw him like that at some point too...

i guess fakir is the one who styles his hair for him before mytho gets his heart back? i imagine fakir is pretty meticulous about maintaining mythos health and appearance, even at the worst stages of their relationship. i think itd be hard for fakir to frame the way he treats mytho as For Mythos Sake if he wasnt doing some level of actually beneficial care for him, so being really fastidious about things like mythos diet and sleep hygiene and hair care and such gives fakir an outlet for his 'you just have to do what i tell you' thing that helps him convince himself it really is helping, no really, hes doing this for mythos benefit and he just has to be strict with him because mytho doesnt UNDERSTAND he needs PROTECTING and fakir is the ONLY ONE who can do it so mytho HAS to let him because if he doesnt then why does fakir even EXIST, if he cant manage this then what is he good for, and--

yknow. the usual complexes. and their relationship is so complex!!! but also so simple, but like. in a good way. fakirs behavior is complicated but his motivation regarding mytho is SO straightforward which makes that downward spiral into harm really easy to map out... i wont go much into that in this post since this is about visual/appearance-related headcanons but just. augh. i love this show and i love these characters!!! and i hope its apparent in my work that i do love them so <3

im hoping to do a set of these for the girls next!!! i have some other stuff to finish first but hopefully... Soon... Some Birds...

[quotevarchive]

hey! hope this ask finds you well. so, im a bit of an amateur digital historian (in that i take internet history seriously) and i like to write casual essays about websites from time to time. quotev flew up on my radar when i saw some yall on cohost, and ive been reading everything i can about it for the last several days. from what i've gathered, nobody really knew quotev's double life except for q users themselves. in fact, it's been such a well-guarded secret that most are unaware of quotev's existence, much less that it was a quiz site with a secret component to it. so i am putting out a call to you and any quotevians reading: would any yall be open to contributing to a quotev post-mortem? it seems like it was a pretty monumental site to many users, and as for the pain of its loss, i understand it myself: the website i consider basically 'my highschool years' went dark just last year, and knowing that it's essentially lost to everyone but those who were there for it bums me out. BUT quotev is still fresh in the minds of the people who called it home, and i'd love a chance to learn more about its unique culture and what made it so special to its users, even if many users now feel betrayed by it. if you do publish this ask (which you are under no obligation to do so), anyone reading it is free to send me an ask directly and i'll make sure my anon is on in case anybody wants to remain anonymous. also just in case i need to clarify, i'm not trying to write a smear piece or anything tabloidesque involving individual users - i want to know quotev as users knew it, whatever was loved and hated and why it will be bitterly missed.

yes hi!!! This ask is so exciting to me because I have been a little too into quotev history and dynamics and social interaction (hence the blog) for a few years now. I only started “archiving” in late 2022, but feel free to look through my older posts for any info. everything's a bit clogged up with the “quotev death” posts but back in the archive there’s a decent amount of stuff. I collect whatever i can. also feel free to hmu if you have any specific questions.

the hidden social media of quotev was always such a funny thing to me. Even older users who used to roleplay or make quizzes and fanfics there didn’t seem to be quite aware that it had become so centered around the activity feed, and of course any mentions of it on bigger platforms like youtube were always like “cringe 12y/o fanfic haha.” (Not that anything we actually did was any less silly.) anyway, i was always torn about this because i did NOT want quotev to become more popular, but i wished people knew about the crazy shit that really went down there. Your post-mortem is a great idea because you’ll be telling the story of social quotev with no worry of sending new users to the site…because he is already dead

I highly encourage any followers who have fond memories or stupid stories to submit them!

[999xswift]

Okay so i have a bunch of Haylor related thoughts.... i feel like a lot has been going on in Haylor world since TTPD dropped.

Now i think that much of Tourtred Poets is about Harry practically all of the 'matty' songs are actually about Harry, I'm no going to go into the lyrical analysis of it all but if you know you know.

So when it came to April 19th and we saw those pictures of Harry in Japan with Taylor Russell I always thought that was super weird cause like why take a trip with your GF when you know your ex is about to release an album about you. Fast forward to TTPD coming out and all the reports and confirmations that Harry ended things with TR, some reports even saying their trip to Japan was a make it or break it trip...

Now before i carry on, I wanna mention some of the other theories ive seen on the interwebs from other Haylor's to seem to think that Harry and Taylor are already together going as far as to say they are married in secret... I'm not saying I believe this because i dont but i do think its an interesting perspective and i feel like i havent seen that many people really talk about it. The idea that potentially TR and TK were and are PR/stunt relationships and Harry and Taylor are waiting for the right time to reveal the truth...

I feel like this theory is one that I want to be TRUE so BADLY sooo badly but i know how crazy it is to think so i cant help but be realistic about the fact that that is probably not true, however i do believe that if Harry and Taylor were going to be together again they would to do in complete privacy and remain that way for quite awhile before people would know. I also think this theory is especially interesting in the context of But Daddy I Love Him...

This is a song where Taylor is hitting back at various groups of people who talk down on her relationships but more specifically it quite obviously speaks about one person in particular whom Taylor wasn't able to be with due to what people thought and said about their relationship... now we know there were many different outside influences that effected Haylor (directioners, swifties, the media, their teams etc)... The song also sees Taylor professing her love for this person this is the 'one thing she's wanted'... screaming 'but daddy i love him'... 'telling him to floor it through the fences, no im not coming to my senses'... in all of these lyrics Taylor seems to be saying she has made her choice and wont be talked out of it or have it taken from her this time around... this is an important part of the song, 'we came back when the heat died down'... her and this person have history and they almost HAD to let time pass to be able to ever be together...

The more and more i listen to this song the more i am starting to think it may be about Harry which does make the insane theory i mentioned earlier very intriguing lol. My first reason is all of the above, the relationship issues she describes fit what went down with her and Harry very well...The obvious 'But Daddy I Love him I'm having his baby' connection to Harry is really obvious and telling to me i mean from the shirt he wore to the Kiwi 'I'm having your baby it's none of your business' line... i mean c'mon... anyway...

Taylor goes on to say 'And no you can't come to the wedding' now i will admit this line makes perfect sense if the wedding has already happened and we were all none the wiser. It also seems to hint that Taylor really is in love with someone that she really does want to marry... this whole song really does feel like a proclamation of love for this one person that she is willing to fight for against the many odds against them and the song ends in a victorious way... seemingly indicated that she did indeed get the 'one thing she wanted'... whether this song is or isn't about Harry there is no way to definitively tell at this moment in time but either way I do think this song is hiding something it feels like a song we will go back to after finding out some sort of information and be like OMG...

I have more thoughts on what’s been going on in recent weeks, I’ll make another post no idea if anyone care at all or is reading this but these two are driving me nuts so I needed to share 😭😩

[parkhumans]

HI WELCOME TO PARKHUMANS

I'm KAZ (he/him) and i'm an artist cartoonist etc etc you know the drill.

ever since i was a kid i had a massive special interest in theme park history and for whatever reason that's been really present in my life as of late. so i created parkhumans, which as you could probably gather is a project where i humanize a ton of rides, attractions, hotels and the like out of a passion for them and their history. i tend to include a lot of anthro elements in my designs too, so the term 'human' is pretty nebulous. more elaboration on what these are will come later down here

ive actually had this project going for a while, i just havent posted much about it here because i just couldnt find the time to. woopssss

some other things i feel are important to know

i dont just exclusively humanize disney parks/attractions. my theme park special interest is very general and encompasses multiple parks not just those

i hate disney as a company and i am sure to make that explicitly clear. when i praise their theme parks, none of that praise is directed towards disney as an enterprise, it's towards the people who are behind the engineering and art of the resorts. again it bears repeating that i am very vocal about the fact that i Do Not support disney as a company. im extremely critical of them. im just a big proponent of preserving the hard work that goes into these resorts and i think that work deserves to be highlighted, and im glad i can convey the history behind these attractions with my art

do not conflate the parkhumans project with c0untryhumans or anything of the same vein. they are not remotely comparable. c0untryhumans is pretty inherently bigoted just as a concept. i don't like the prospect of being conflated with that as with the parkhumans project is something i create with as much tact in mind. i purposefully go out of my way to avoid depicting things that are offensive or in poor taste in this project.

tangentially related to that last point, there are certain attractions i refuse to make designs for. generally this includes rides that have had tragedies occur directly on them that are inseparable from their histories (such as america sings), rides that have origins in inherently bigoted sources (this is why i wont ever do splash mountain) or have bigoted things within them, and, this one is more of a case by case basis, but i tend to stray away from heavily ip-focused attractions. what i mean by this is that you won't see me making characters based off star wars or marvel rides. this is more out of a personal place, as i simply just dont enjoy doing it. i feel like certain companies have gotten too comfortable just relying on their ips and its something im very loud about being disappointed in. i prefer to focus my time on the attractions i like, not ones that are just popular. of course that last one has a ton of exemptions so you cant expect me to 100% uphold it, but just keep in mind that i dont really pay mind to the attractions i feel are kind of corporate and shoehorned in. if you want more elaboration on my stance on this, here's a twt thread i made regarding it

normally i dont take requests for designs unless i ask for them myself. again, i like to do my own thing most of the time

i dont consider this to be a big collaborative thing, but that doesnt mean i wont let people make their own spins on this idea. i have my own vision in mind for this thing but im totally open to the idea of people making their own fanchars and stuff!

& some other things

here is a big doc i made explaining what parkhumans are in case you're wondering about the specifics of how they operate

also heres the toyhouse page

that should be it 👍 ok cya

[nudibutch]

long post abt me thinking about my dom likes/dislikes. im musing. i feel like this is needed to get my thoughts straightened out since its been on my mind lately.

things i dont like when domming

- raw power/physically overpowering someone, roughness. for example i don't think i could ever comfortably facefuck someone Hard hard. id be too worried about hurting them and that would be on my mind the entire time. i also dont think physical force is my style. it doesnt really fit my personality

- 100% degradation. same as above. i don't enjoy being mean this way.... it feels bad to me and i would constantly worry they think i mean it

- certain power dynamics. i dont like the idea of someone subbing to me because im stronger than them, know more than them, better than them, have a position of power over them (eg prof/student rp)...

- making decisions for my partner. in general i don't think im looking for "no thoughts head empty" in this way.

- brats. i just really dont like the dynamic. a lot of the ways brats want to be dommed falls under rougher/harsher tactics and it more often than not annoys and frustrates me because it feels like im fighting someone when im just trying to cooperate. a GOOD brat dynamic requires a LOT of communication and even then i can only try and "tame" the brat (whatever its called) for so long.

- cnc. this is a super hard gray area to navigate between overstim/free use, which i can be into, but requires a LOT of communication and i would not just do it with anyone right off the bat. i still had hesitations doing this with partners i knew very well.

things i DO like when domming/the idea of when domming

- bondage. i like the look, and i like the physical helplessness it creates for a sub. i like honing sensation and this is definitely one of the ways to do it.

- experimentation/exploration. not in the literal sense - everything should always be discussed beforehand - but i like slow toying/appreciation. i dont like rushing to a destination and i think this comes out a lot with teasing.

- certain power dynamics. unlike the ones i listed before i REALLY like the idea of power in the sense of, "i safely led this person to this state of mind" and also "i can safely lead them to the kind of experience i want them to have".

- exhibition. i LOVE taking pictures, videos, etc. i like posting certain things. i really like the idea of tying up/teasing/and/or fingering a sub in front of a small audience. i like the idea of showing off not only how well i can make this person fall apart, but also how pretty they are when they do.

things i find interesting reflecting on my past dominant experiences:

- i almost never ask for the things i like when domming, and i almost never make a decision when it comes to any sexual act. i always ask, "how do you want to be fucked" and never really say, "im gonna fuck you." i think this is kind of because of my aversion to "things i don't like" #1/#3/#4. no matter how many times a sub says "i want you to do whatever you want to me", or "just fuck me", i dont really adhere to that and i dont trust it. that might be because of bad past experiences with subs without specific constraints. it might be because its undefined cnc to me, and im really worried about doing something a sub doesnt want after they say, "fuck me however you want." thats almost definitely residual from subs with shit communication skills. more on that below.

- that being said, i think there probably exists a sweet spot in the above bullet point. i SHOULD, theoretically, be doing a little more of what i like and want, as a dom, and not just exist as a 2-dimensional service top. this isnt to say that i havent enjoyed past domming experiences - i really have. but looking back, i think ive spent a disproportionate amount of time asking subs what they want and like, and less time talking about what i like. this is partly because no one really asks, and this is partly because im historically bad at speaking up. if something is Working Just Fine, im not inclined to change it - partly because im afraid of the rejection of my desires if i DO speak up (ie, they arent worth anything, which gets back to a core belief ive been addressing in therapy, etc.). this has definitely happened in the past where i try to bring up certain things and a sub expresses obvious disdain, and i backpedal it hard to assure them its not a big deal and to just forget about it. thats almost definitely a result of domming subs with poor communication/sense of self issues, and certainly not my fault, but i need to get better about vetting people that will respond maturely in a discussion about desires/kinks/etc. my dom dynamic and style is fine, but seems incredibly passive when i think about it, and it shouldnt be like that. it should be a two way street, and my partner SHOULD be expressing curiosity and excitement about learning what im into.

- a personal priority of mine is figuring out what my needs are for dom aftercare. i spend a lot of time making sure a sub is okay after, and that in and of itself can SOMETIMES be "aftercare" for me - i get to check in with them, make sure they enjoyed what happened, and that reassures me what i did was okay, too. but outside of that i dont have a clear idea. i think subs asking or offering specific things helps a lot. cuddling is important. if someone just up and leaves or is like "alright lets go out" after sex i really dont do well with the transition. i need to speak up more about this, but also i need to prioritize finding people who just know to ask or check in.

[prince-liest]

I… oh my god. So much. Has happened. Bear… bear with me. This time i KNow its gonna be a long one. First of all, oh my GOD. THERE WAS NO BAD NEWS IN UR LAST ANSWER. HOLY SHIT. I see how i read into ur previous answer, that val is the only dumper, but yes what you described is EXACTLY the same flavor as what I was describing. It also works SO MUCH BETTER, OH MY GOD! “Vox managing to be the one to break things off at any given point in time hinges on him being able to frame his rationale as "anger" rather than "upset," the latter of which just gets brushed under the carpet of Emotions That Are Not Taken Seriously. [...] anything that makes him feel vulnerable or, ah, let's deliberately and pointedly use the word hysterical, is a pre-existing internal struggle that Valentino knows how to manipulate to his advantage. [and vox does not break up with val when he feels as such]” PRINCE IM RIPPING MY FUCKING HAIR OUT!!!!!!!!!!!! THTAS. THATS EXACTLY WHAT TF IM TALKING ABOUT. You just clarified that extra layer of “oh my god this is fucking perfect.’ also. ALSO. them getting back together being sappy makeup sex…. Oh my god. Oh my dear god. If it wasnt clear, i am a Heathen for voxval, too. If you ever feel inspired to write a voxval fic i promise you my firstborn. 

OHHHHHH  MY GOD IM SO HAPPY MY RAMBLINGS HELPED YOU WITH THE FIC!!!!!! TBH IVE RARELY BEEN THIS OVERJOYED. LIKE I COULDNT STOP GRINNING AND GIGGLING WHEN I SAW IT. FUCKKKKK. Also im fucking cackling that my actual impact was bringing vox to severe distress instead of a more angry and annoyed disposition. Like yeah,,.. Im here to make you suffer, baby. LOVE YOU VOX! 

Im gonna leave my thoughts for actual fic for another ask bc… yeah. I will spare you. - 🌓

Do NOT spare me, I enjoy these immensely. >:) Proof:

Very genuinely, I had kinda been squinting at the actual scene in question with dissatisfaction for a hot minute, so I was very pleased when your ask made it click to me what the fuck felt so wrong about it. So thank you!

Staticmoth is definitely percolating in my brain and I want to write something for them because, like you, I am also indeed deeply invested in them (they are my favorite ship very much alongside radiostatic, which is probably not obvious given I haven't written anything actively centered around them - but they're like the fucked up, evil version of MHA erasermic for me in this fandom because they Must be present in the narrative and also I love them). I haven't had any specific ideas good enough to turn into a fic yet, but I might just mash them all together at some point or, y'know. Go the Good Olde [insert wanking hand motion here] route!

[xxlovelynovaxx]

Okay I know this is referring to a very specific phenomenon but takes like this still PISS ME THE FUCK OFF. Screenshot below.

STOP FUCKING MAKING OTHER PEOPLE'S EXPERIENCE OF AND APPROACH TO THEIR ILLNESS ABOUT YOU.

Screenshot end.

[Image ID: two screenshots of a tumblr post which reads: ive been on tumblr a long time and i remember when everyone said "oh don't romanticize mental illness" and it was agreed that doing that was gross and a good way to kill people indirectly

but somehow we've come full circle and there are people who legit defend their right to be anti-recovery there are people who don't want to get better and spread the idea that you can't get better as if it's gospel and it's fucking frightening to me bc nobody seems to want to say "hey? this is toxic and untrue and is your disease speaking, and it's not something you should accept."

and i feel like every recovery post gets about 500 of these people saying "this isn't something that will work" "cool karen i'm depressed" "maybe it worked for you but it won't work for other people" and that's... just... im so sorry if you're 15. i'm sorry if you're in high school and watching grown adults tell you it doesn't get better. that nobody says that with time and help and patience the world stops being so heavy, that accepting your illness as a fact is one thing but accepting it as the only way to be is just wrong, that you can learn to live with it and still find some degree of "happy".... if i had seen this shit back when i was ... oh god starting at 12 when i was already self-harming .... i think i'd have actually honest-to-god killed myself. not a joke, not a funny tumblr punchline, i would have actually just killed myself.

i'm saying this right here and right now to the adults on this site. if you for any reason shoot down positivity that's causing no harm - you might have indirectly worsened someone else's condition, and you should try and do better in the future. if you find it necessary to tell people "recovery is a lie", you need to do better. i know everyone has different circumstances, but i also know that mental illness behaves in such a way that everyone thinks they can't recover. if you feel like you should be spreading the Word Of Relapse, you are causing toxic language to be normalized and you need to do better.

im team "cool karen ive got depression and that means i'm going to try this because i've got to try something" i'm team "romanticize recovery" i'm team "it isn't working now but it might in the future and it's worth staying to find out” im team “hey this didn't work for me but it might help somebody else out"

fuck guys it shouldn't be an unpopular opinion to say "i don't want any of you to die". /end ID]

Stop denying the autonomy of mentally ill and mad people and saying "this is just your mental illness speaking and if you think this you need to be forced to recover for your own good"!!! You're a huge fucking ableist if you do this! It's something I've fucking accepted because constantly fighting against it was causing me MORE HARM than learning to live as a person with mental illness, fuck off!

Some people genuinely can't recover! Get this, some people have MORE SEVERE mental or physical illness than you. How is this fucking different than saying "[medication] or [treatment regimen] made my MCAS/POTS go into complete remission, so why are you still experiencing anaphylactic episodes despite trying every possible intensive treatment/med?"

(I try to only use examples I have personal experience with whenever possible to avoid unintentional ableism. This one is especially apt though as depression and most mental illnesses are not an acute injury, but rather a chronic illness. Remission is possible for some people. At least currently, a "cure" isn't, and recovery is usually closer to management than complete healing. Ofc not all injuries can heal either, but I think it's more apt to compare apples to apples here.)

Also, depression isn't the only mental illness, double fuck off!

Get this, I know my own needs and my own brain and my own illness better than you, triple fuck off!

Like yes, don't shit on positivity posts. In the same way anti-recovery posts aren't for everyone, if a recovery positivity post isn't for you, just move on. Filter or block if you need to.

That being said, there's a difference between positivity posts and posts that say "recovery/this aspect of recovery is mandatory". That kind of "positivity" IS causing harm. Stating "hey this isn't mandatory for recovery and recovery itself is optional, do what helps you most even if that means remaining mentally ill" isn't fucking "spreading the Word of Relapse".

Also "maybe it worked for you but it won't work for everyone" is quite literally not an attack and CERTAINLY not anti-recovery. There isn't a single recovery tool on the PLANET that will work for everyone. That's just a fucking fact.

All I can think of when I see this is that OP probably reblogged that post that basically said "you need to brush your teeth, if you don't you're harming yourself and are therefore a Bad Person, and if you can't, you can actually and are basically just refusing to recover out of laziness I mean because you're not trying hard enough I mean because you don't want to and your poor mental health is basically therefore your fault." Because yes, that was the implication of that post.

Refusing to acknowledge that people can be disabled enough BY ANY ILLNESS to not be able to recover isn't actually helping mentally ill people.

Like, even setting aside that I literally romanticize my mental illnesses as a healthy coping mechanism (signed off on by my therapist, in case you only believe people certified by the oppressive institution known as psychiatry), even setting aside that I have mental illnesses that can't be cured and that I don't want treated in part or in whole (I don't want meds or therapy for my schizophrenia, I only want to achieve functional multiplicity with my DID, as examples)...

It's not "spreading the idea that you can't get better" to acknowledge that SOME people can't get better. First of all, fucking curate your own online experience. Second of all, me saying I will never live without severe anxiety, as one example, is exactly the same as me saying I'll never be able to navigate the world without a mobility aid. It's fucking acknowledging my material reality. It's better for ME to stop wasting all my energy on the stuff that I either fully can't do or that hurts me to try to do and focus on what PERSONALLY makes my quality of life better, even if it makes me MORE ILL.

Finally, even if someone CAN recover, they don't fucking owe you that! There is no moral imperative for them to recover! If them choosing to continue to be mentally ill (by which this post only means depression, but even then), is triggering to you, that's a fucking you problem.

Give people the tools to recover, but forced recovery is inherently a form of violence because it violates a person's autonomy! Why don't you focus on building a society where the social conditions responsible for a good portion of depression are simply gone instead of yelling at mentally ill disabled people on the internet who make choices about their own illness that you don't like?

And stop fucking saying "if you make a decision I disagree with, it's your mental illness speaking and you're not actually capable of recognizing that or of making your own decisions (and therefore need "rescuing")"!!!

That's the justification used for institutionalization and psychiatric abuse.

That's the reason so many psychotic people who are not harming anyone have their psychosis forcibly suppressed via nonconsensual medication. (And quite honestly, even for those few that are causing harm, there are other options besides "lose all autonomy" and "be harmfully medicated into an approximation of a sanist concept of normalcy that is actually just drugging someone into docile compliance". Make no mistake, antipsychotics themselves are not inherently harmless and DO require informed consent. Though I am all for their usage by people who DO grant noncoerced informed consent; I'm not anti-med, I'm pro-consent.

It's not "normalizing toxic language" to literally argue for mad liberation and respecting the autonomy of mentally ill people. To say "I actually know my own self and experiences best and can therefore say this is not coming from the mental illness" or EVEN "it is coming from the mental illness, but I am still capable of making the decision to choose this anyway, because mental illness does not make me inherently incapable of consent" (yes, even if it causes the brain to be in an altered state, stop with that paternalistic bullshit), isn't something you need to "do better" about.

Fuck off.

Another thing: why do these posts ALWAYS go hand in hand with childism. It's a bunch of "15 years olds being hurt by the meanie adults who say they can't get better" and "toxic evil adults harming kids by teaching them that it's okay to make peace with being unhealthy because what's best for people isn't universal and our idea of recovery is very rigid anyway as proven by the idea that accepting your mental illness as it is isn't recovery".

I see you, 15 year olds who ARE mentally ill and are writing about mad liberation and anti-recovery and are wildly more capable and coming up with ideas in those veins that are blowing us all out of the water. For what it's worth, I'm proud of you, and my only wish for you is that you find the peace, whatever that means, that is best for you.

Just...

"if I had read this at 12 I would have actually killed myself" I'm glad you didn't, then, but that doesn't mean the sentiment shouldn't exist.

If anti-recovery isn't for you, that's fine. What's not fine is acting like it's inherently harmful and is a form of violence against every mentally ill person ever. Because many of us have been harmed by a culture that is "pro-recovery" and its logical extreme, forced recovery.

[rodolfoparras]

So yesterday marks the very first time I’ve posted a fic on here

I had written fics before but this was my first ever 18+ fic

Before I started writing for the cod fandom I had stuck to reading cod fics on ao3 specifically price pieces and I rmr one day wanting to read a fic where price teaches reader how to smoke cigars but I just knew there wasn’t an x male reader piece around so I decided to write it myself

I spent a month researching how to write smut trying to get a proper feel of price’s character and translate those very same traits into my own fic

And when I was completely done with it I almost didn’t post it but I did and I believe in one day I got 200 notes which was insane. I didn’t know how active people were on tumblr I really just wanted to create a price piece and do what I love which is writing

The next piece took 3 weeks before I posted it mostly because I was picking and poking at it but then I told myself you know if I’m going to be running a writing blog I have to write more often

So I pushed myself to write more often and back then I had just started to become fixated with price so I had plenty of ideas at hand

Slowly but surely I started to post more and more pieces and my blog started to grow. From April to maybe June month I had gotten two requests and maybe one ask where it was an anon who was just interested in talking to me and I rmr feeling over the moon about it

And then June month I started to grow rapidly like I really was there like whats going on 🧍🏻 i rmr the writers i looked up to became mutuals with me and i genuinely couldnt believe this was happening.

june- september i felt myself become more confident in my writing and i started to write like every 2-3 days and that’s when so many of you guys joined my blog and i rmr just being surprised that so many of you wanted to talk to me and that i went from one anonie to having a little council of yall

then november - February came around and that period is usually the worst for my mental l health but writing and having you guys show so much love not only for my work but also and it genuinely helped me so much

now its been a year of writing fics and im just really appreciative

also its so cool to be able to see how much ive grown how i went from spending a month on writing a fic to being able to produce pieces im actually proud of in the span of 3 days it's also fun to see how much knowledge ive gained by just writing like ill find myself reading pieces and im able to see minimal adjustment i can make that while make the scene flow whiles before id be questioning my grammar in every sentence

so what i want to say with this yapping is thank you guys and if youre someone who wants to get into ff writing pls do so

at first you'll feel like a weed in a garden but as times goes on you’ll realize how much you and your work has made the garden bloom🫶🏻