#also it wouldn't let me @ you sorry!! hhh

[yuriyuruandyuraart]

Opinions on Dream? :^

SO many feelings about him omgg rant under cut please forgive me

okay so i don't really talk or draw him much cause honestly,,,most of the times i just think he's a bit....boring? or more accurately plain? not in a mean way either but just in a 'fades into the background' type of way like don't get me wrong!! he's a really nice friend to his peers, his feelings about his powers and aura making his relationships harder to navigate and trust along with his whole conflict with nightmare and morality about what's good and bad IS very cool!! and i love it whenever they write him to be complex and not on this black and white mentality or when he's just straight up following along his friends with no free will or with a dubious purpose without ever addressing his issues or feelings! it's just unsatisfying to me :')

or when they're making him the 'naive' and oblivious, (sometimes childish?) character being marked as the obstacle and villain along with the other star sanses from the fic's pov, always talking about doing good things while fighting his brother and not hearing him out about the balance, (and for weak reasons most of the time. like it's been so long and you STILL haven't sat down with him when he's, generally, basically begged you to just have a talk? guys please :'( ) or when they go for the victim sad dream always missing the old nightmare, where corrupted nightmare is the incarnation of evil, with no sympathy or emotion except anger and sadistic glee, killing and hurting everyone and dream's just trying to protect the multiverse and dream's always been in the right. such extremes!!!

LIKE!! i hope i'm not the only one that thinks a 500+ year old should have had enough time to idk. learn things? about people and manipulation and deceit? after knowing what the villagers did to night? about the bad things in the world and how there's a lot of grey areas in life and that he maybe reflected on his past enough to process and ask himself if there should to be a convo to settle his differences with nightmare (and you can make nightmare the stubborn one too! or have them BOTH be petty and imperfect and have some things wrong and some right at the same time like why do i always see the good guy vs bad guy cliché with these two when they're the perfect example of why positivity doesn't have meaning without the negativity!! as long as there's a satisfying evolution or growth that doesn't leave me empty i'm good yknow?)

plus i believe dream really isn't as dumb as people view him. i do get some of you saying he probably can't read or write since that's actually a pretty interesting idea to explore! but in general please let him have emotions other than pure sunshiny happiness or endless sadness like he's gotta have more depth than that! let him make mistakes, have flaws that don't just make him the bad guy that's always in the wrong by default, and be angry or suspicious or jealous or bitter or battling his mental health problems/depression or malicious or smart or witty or mischievous and silly or sarcastic or ANYTHING dude i just want him to be put into different scenarios where he can be serious or lighthearted like it doesn't even have to be long or perfect but make him feel real.

it could definitely be that i don't read or see much art about dream or really look for it hard enough but also i just. i feel bad for even saying this fr and i wanna be honest about why i don't enjoy most stories about him cause he always gets the worst treatment along with ink!!! especially ink omg the poor guy has it the worst i think like wow do they mess him up :'(

always one dimensional in non shippy fics, or too plain or easily replaceable by other, more entertaining people in the significant other's life in most of his ships like man. i have read fics out there that made me genuinely FEEL and root for him and love his character so much it restored all hope for me!!! but i can only name one on top of my head and the others? it's been so long i don't even remember their names i just legit feel terrible cause i love him still and i can't find many headcanons that fit my interpretation of him yknow?

not to say people who write him very happy, mislead or sad are ruining him like that's silly- if i see something i don't like i just. move on bro i wouldn't force people to feel or think the same way i do about him cause anyone can have whatever headcanons they want!!! just talking about what i personally look for in him and why i can't exactly find it since most of the stuff out there just isn't my cup of tea :')

hopefully i didn't set anyone off with this rambling opinionated essay i just pulled hhh xD i know i know he's a popular character and i know a lot of people like dream so *sobs* please please recommend me artists and fics about him that you think is good it's been so looong since i've read or seen anything new that makes me attached to this little guy aughg<33333

[yostresswritinggirl]

I love how Hoyo is trying so hard to make Cyno seem intimidating but we all see his "desperate puppy that wants attention" side

Anyways

Your desert dweller pining idea gave me reincarnated tragic lovers vibes

Like reader was with Kasala in the past before the forbidden knowledge was brought to the desert, infecting them with eleazar and killing them

Which was probably part of why Kasala didn't fear death in the end knowing it means reuniting with the one he loved

Then centuries later you both are reincarnated in the same era as an eremite and Cyno. Ultimately meeting and falling in love just like in your past lives but now separated because of readers loyalty to the scarlet king

(Heck maybe it was the same in that past but switched with Kasala's devotion to his lord and reader being the one pining)

And then when the truth of the two gods are revealed you both get flashbacks of your last moments together centuries ago, the sight of reader's scale covered body slowly losing life with Kasala sitting right by holding tightly to their hand, unwilling to let go even if he has accepted this reality

The least could be done is letting your final sight of him be a happy one

"I love you even in the face of death, there nothing that could take this away..."

As reader close their eyes a small smile is visible on their pale face, clearly at peace with Kasala's words

"... but perhaps...in a new world, we can peacefully live together"

I'll let you decide what happens next

Side note: imagine Kasala or Cyno(to be a tease) calling you his eternal love or something similar. I wouldn't even need to have eleazar to die they'd just kill me with that

Also after a week of scarab nightmare cyno is finally maxed other than getting him decent equipment but that's besides the point

- Vagabond anon

Holy shit I just read a whole story, thank you so much for the good fucking food, Vagabond !! AAAAAAA

Holy shit like holy shit, I'm going to cry, I'm giggling right now especially the "eternal love" part Cyno would totally be the type to say that with a teasing smirk everytime. Oh man I can even imagine Reader being part of Rahman's group and clashing with him at least once hhh (sorry I've been craving writing fight scenes)

What if after regaining your memories just like how Rahman's still griping with the fact, Reader is also still like trying to make sense of the fact, right? But on Cyno's case, down bad boyo, is literally just trailing you while you pace back and forth trying to convince yourself that reincarnation exists. That's where desperate puppy that wants attention comes from mmmm - maybe Reader being apprehensive in the present is because they mostly remember how Kasala is distant due to his devotion to the Scarlet King jgnhhh

Like I'm imagining this is after act 4 and before 3.2 so he's stuck with you in the desert that whole time and he won't even let you breathe. Taking every opportunity to go to you like:

Dehya: We'll need Rahman's group to assist us here -

Cyno: *immediately stands up* I'll inform them right away.

Candace: We don't have to yet, we're just going over the plan -

Alhaitham: He's already gone.

Omayghad I love this au so much, holy crap, I'm foaming at the mouth *hugs tight with consent* Vagabond, thank you for accompanying me on my Kasala brainrot;;;;

[monstrouslyobsessed]

…tumblr can you go and soak yourself in a burning pit of hot sauce…i never even got notifs of any of the older asks i got…

so very sorry if you've been waiting for like two months on my answers;;; and here i was wondering how dead my inbox was last month…rude, tumblr, very rude. all the asks are under the cut!

just a quick note, to the super sweet asker who send in two very long asks v recently, ima answer them separately after this one, if thats okay!! &lt;3

tw / tags: dirty confession, monster fucking, breeding mentions, implied noncon, brief pregnancy mentions, long post, beastfolk / beastfolks characters mentioned: lady hyena, the lioness, conservative lion, papa bull, duke, cerelos, father fox, velarius

I love Daddy Bull and Duke, (along with so many other of your works!), do you have any plans on doing a confrontation between the two bulls and the reader? My thirst is dryer than the Sahara for these two bulls. I need more content. I’m a desperate whore… 。・゜・(ノД`)・゜・。 —anonymous

hm i'm STILL chewing on how this saga should go tbf because it really could go any way!!! i might just bite the bullet and write au's of papa bull and duke saga, even if i feel a little weird making varying storyline au's of my characters.

it was just supposed to be a bull daddy enjoying his little human, how did duke end up there lol

I know everyone is dying over Baldur’s gate rn but have you heard of Lustful Desires on itch.io? I just got into it and I’m dying to talk about it. They literally let you have a poly relationship with 3 different werewolves it’s so good —@flameshadowwolf

i've never heard of it! ima have to check it out now, thanks for the rec &lt;3

Sorry if you consider this a request, but I'm very interested about your OC's yandere MBTI types (from @ddarker-dreams), so if you feel like it, can you identify them in this system? —anonymous

i…ah, am kinda bad with these mbti things. idk if its because i'm older than most writers i know (hi lock my love!! hope you're doing fantastic!), but i guess i can make my best attempt…? i'll just pick a few characters and list them for ya. if you want more specific characters or want me to make an official post with expanded explation, lmk and i'll make my best attempt

here's the link for anyone who are interested

lady hyena: reverent, delusional(?), manipulative (?), lenient, rdml the lioness: reverent, aware, honest, and strict(?), rahs conservative lion: cruel, aware, honest, and strict, cahs papa bull: reverent, delusional, honest, and strict(?), rdhs duke: cruel(?), delusional, manipulative, and strict, cdms father fox: reverent, aware, honest, and lenient(ish), rahl valerius: reverent, delusional(?), manipulative, and lenient, rdml

that's just a few! and they're all beastfolks since they're more fresh in my mind, aha. i tried my best hhh

Thirst chat thought: Have you ever thought that Cerelos could just find a way to tie up his wife underneath him as a cock sleeve, gag her, and just walk around a bit for the day doing royal duties and stuff? The man already has a equine skirt he wears, so he can easily hide everything underneath… (Also I’d happily give this man a dozen babies because I am a simp for him 💕) —anonymous

i think i touched upon that at one point! i wanna say he did that during a large meeting, maybe with his darling magically gagged? lemme see if i can find that post…

found it! its super brief but still

well, now i wanna write that…that's one more to my long to-do list, aha.

also you're valid

I am a simple man all I desire is your happiness. Tis all. I noticed you were feeling sad lately and I thought man next time I have extra money I'll kofi MO but recently I acquired a small fortune and I was happy to find a way to repay you for the time my friends and I giggle and go horny over your works Re-Reading your works is payment enough ….but if you wish to repay me I wouldn't mind maybe a dilf monster vampire (kinda like what you did for wolf pack? but Victorian times) or sequel to snake movie star or sequel/prequel dragon But I would rather you do what you are passionate about! Share your creations with the world! Rejoice in your delights! —anonymous

hi i love you and i swear i answered this before

i did the snek boi just for you <3 i hope you (and your friends!!) enjoyed it! he's a difficult boi to get through but i had fun writing him and his weird camera hobby

link: SMILE FOR THE CAMERA

Also increase your kofi goal —anonymous

im…okay. i didn't really have a goal target in mind so i hope thats sufficient??? sdfkdfj

Which of the beast folk are most likely to mate with humans? Like what about big cat beastfolk? —anonymous

it'd be fangedfolk, since they're canine (dogs) and are most attracted to the humans'…hm , simplicity and openness, i suppose you could say? and possibly treefolk (primates). i based my beastfolks' basic common grounds with irl animals, as canines are pack animals and dogs are more emotionally connected to us. as for primates, humans have evolutionary connections, similar social intelligence, and the shared abilities to solve problems and such.

that said, while fangedfolk are the most likely to have a human "companion", they are also most likely to have a poly pack with their human. whiskeredfolk (feline) are probably in the top-middle of that list, if we were to have a most-to-least likely ranking, with toothedfolk (rodents) due to their prey/nervous natures and seafolks (aquatic) on how dangerous/rare they are to communicate with, at the very bottom. the reason why i feel the whiskeredfolk being in the top-middle is that they can be fairly arrogant and being independent, but adores the complete attention their human can give them and how easily they are to manipulate.

that said, this is extremely generalized list, since the list is not really factoring in specific sub-groups under these categories, such as lions being social animals and are more likely to acquire a human lover, cheetahs more likely to need a service human pet to help with their anxieties, maned wolf being solitary type, etc. and other facets, like countries/areas, cultures, when/which eras, political affiliations, etc.

hope this answers your question, love!

Hello, I've been binging your Masterlist and I just want to say your OCS are exquisite —anonymous

i think you're exquisite as well, love! <3 thank you~

Are you eventually going to do more father fox content?? He's my favorite and I love him so much ♥️ —anonymous

ye! i have couple requests for more hcs for him~though they're all kinda pretty broad. if you have anything more specific for a hc request, hmu! i'd love to write a full piece of him someday too, since i think his quietly manipulative personality is fascinating to work with.

Daddy Bull and Duke content soon? I NEED these two fine beasts in my life!!! And can’t wait till the cute baby arrives!!! And hopefully many more…😋🥰 —anonymous

send in a request then~! preferably something a bit less broad, aha, but yes!

i especially would love to write a full story of those two someday, maybe as a book?

Hi hey sorry to bother you, hypothetically if I wanted to make an ai bot of one of your beastfolks, would that be alright? If not I totally understand, I just want to make sure! —anonymous

as long as there are proper credits included, go for it! just please be sure to link back to me if you do make one &lt;3

whewwww, i...really hope i didn't miss anyone. most of them were (or looked like) a request of some kind and two i wanted to put into their own posts for me to answer soon.

hope yall are doing wonderfully and are having at least a decent holiday season!! ima try and get something nice out by christmas so heres hoping!! just...gonna decide on which i wanna do...lol.

[chemicalcarousel]

is it normal for the host of a system to having attributed your headmates' behavior/thoughts/opinions/ect to yourself before you were made aware of your plurality?

and is it normal for other headmates to having confused themselves as being you, the host, in the past?

(gonna do a "keep reading" for the rest of it, since it became a long rant about my& struggle with our mental health)

ig it's because we just thought that was what being one person was idk we do be a lil stoopid lmao. like... i remember some episodes where levi was close to the front or fronting with me where we were well aware that there was a levi there (name and all), but we thought it was a delusion or we just brushed it off as if it never happened. then we identified as otherkin/fictionkin (since levi is an introject from a fictional source). levi thought he wasn't his own person and he still seems freaked out by the thought of existing and honestly i dont blame him since i find existing freaky too hxkfsfksxs

i thought one of the littles was me doing involuntary age regression as some sort of emotional flashback, but idk my therapist thinks she's a seperate part and ngl it makes more sense. she's much different, but probably based on young me and holds our trauma from that time. i'm personally emotionally distanced to the trauma mostly, but she's the one holding it. every therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist that have met her are extremely surprised how i change so drastically. and they have all commented on how im not in touch with my emotions when i describe my trauma very analytically. but then sometimes "i" start acting like a scared child. i cant control it in any way. i especially cant control my body language, my thoughts, my emotions, and my speech. and after the episode is over i definitely have emotional amnesia. it was a dissociated child part

also the child has a passive influence on me from positive triggers too and it's hard to control that. let's just say we have a lot of plushies lmao but idk they are very cute and the big ones are good for especially the littles to ground and soothe themselves. sometimes hugging one also helps when a little is upset inside of the body. we have a hard time reaching each other inside the headspace, it's like we are lost in an infinite void of darkness where we can sense each other faintly at times, but it's so hard to communicate. but i hugged a big, soft plushie once i felt a little crying and i kept repeating that we are safe and that she's not alone and that we love her. idk why the plushie hugging helped, but my theory is that she might have felt it through our body and hugging that plushie helps her. she didnt seem to be at the front at all, but idk maybe she could still feel it?? idk how this works, my therapist has been very hesitant to help us, even though she's the one who was like "yeah you are three different parts, i've observed them all" (havent told her about lee bc we are scared and he only fronts when we are alone and he can do some activities he likes)

TW // suicidal ideation mention

our therapist is a licenced psychiatrist and psychotherapist who is specialised in mood disorders (we have bipolar), so maybe that's why she's so bad at handling our case. she's like "it's hard to work with your trauma when you're either not in touch with it or you're triggered to the point of closing off from the world". bruh........ we're trying our best here, you're supposed to like.... know what to do. there's a reason that we are here, if we knew how to handle this we wouldn't need therapy wtf. sadly we barely have an income high enough to live off of since we aren't allowed to work yet due to our strong anxiety and s//cidal ideation. also we dont have the right disorders to get disability (only schizo-spec or bpd, denmark is so stupid istfg). hhh life is so hard and we are super split on having hope for the future or not

TW OVER // suicidal ideation mention

anyway, a question turned into a rant (yet again). ig it's because we literally have no one to talk to about this. sorry hhhhgggg

~ Sof (she/he/they)

[neurodiversebones]

i'm sorry you're having a hard time :( recovery is tough, but i believe in you! if you're comfortable, do you wanna share your recovery headcanons for those characters?

i hope things get better for you soon 💖 you've got this!

thank you !!! i hope things get easier soon as well bc . hhh !!! this is a Lot !!! you are so sweet <33 as for the headcanons i would be Delighted to share them (i am always so nervous to talk abt ed hc's , even if it's recovery related bc i am So Scared of being accused of romanticizing it 😭) . obvious tw for ed's below the cut !

cam :

in recovery from anorexia (AN-R) !

she is like me frfr in that recovery is a Long road for her . she's struggled for a long time, and so recovery is kind of a lifelong process rather than something she can simply Finish and be okay

her ocd has contributed a lot to her ed, and so ed recovery goes hand in hand with ocd recovery. with this, her anxiety starts to go down a Lot !

she has . a lot of guilt pertaining to her ed . guilt over having it, guilt over getting better, guilt over literally Everything . this is something she is Working On in therapy but boy is it a big hurdle

she . really never learned how to cook much , and so something that is helping her associate food with Good Times is learning how ! arastoo is teaching her a lot- these are her favourite nights, being in the kitchen with him and learning how to make something new. he shares his cultural dishes with her and she is so excited about this <3 (she is still not a very good cook because that is just how cam Is . takeout girlie for life .)

brennan :

in recovery from arfid ! as well as orthorexic tendencies

her arfid is specifically related to both sensory issues (hello fellow autistic arfid havers) and trauma (foster care = unreliable access to food)

trying new things is really hard for her- she has a very strict list of foods she eats and has very rarely strayed from that over the years. it takes a few tries before actually being able to eat something new- she needs to be able to look at it, feel the texture, experience the smell and other sensations that come along with it .

her arfid did go generally unnoticed because her safe foods would be considered "atypical"- she doesn't eat highly processed or packaged foods, and almost all of her safe foods are considered "health foods" (thank you orthorexia) .

booth tries new things with her- when she challenges a fear food, he'll try one of her "healthy" foods that he usually wouldn't be a fan of . it helps her to recognize that balance is both possible and healthy , and they are both finding new things they enjoy ! she learned that she rlly enjoys popcorn and sour candy , and he is surprisingly into quinoa now

hodgins :

recovering from ednos / osfed !

his ed was very heavily based in his gender dysphoria , so being able to transition has helped a LOT . a big part of why he recovered was so he could get top surgery without it posing a risk to his health

[SEASON 3 AND SEASON 11 SPOILERS HERE] trauma also plays a big part- he really, really struggled after zack was sent away, as well as after his accident . it's a coping mechanism for him- so in times of stress, he's prone to turn back and relapse

his relationships with others help- his love for angela, his love for his kids, his love for his friends at work- they all keep him grounded and give him something to live for. he wants to be around as long as possible to spend more time with them <3

angela is literally the most patient EVER and it makes him feel so loved and supported (tbh . i have angela headcanons too but my brain is telling me that's Too Many . let me know if u wanna hear those too .)

[TRIGGER WARNING : SH MENTION] he is also in recovery from sh and is almost a year clean which is such a win jack hodgins so cool era

that is all !!!!! i Think about them a lot because all of the bones characters are my comfort characters , so thinking abt them dealing w the stuff i am helps me through a Lot . i love these guys so much they deserve the world

[mythicalmyles]

Hey uh, I know this is weird probably idk, coming from a total stranger and like, im very nervous to send this ask cause I have been snapped on before like,,years ago for trying to be nice to someone on this hellsite lmao. But like,,uhm,,please remember to take some self care days when u can, I know life can be really mean and unfair, especially to those who don't deserve it and sometimes you just need some time to like,,idk uh,,read? Draw? Or just talk to a trusted friend. I'm not telling you what to do by any means I promise I just kinda wanna be the person to remind you to be kind to yourself yknow? {Also please don't respond to this if u don't want to I have been hesitant on sending this for like 5 minutes because I'm terrified of people on this site, im a really sensitive person and getting snapped at years ago as like, a teen kinda was a bit traumatic for me hhh} but, uh,,please just remember to drink water, eat and be kind to your brain. I know what happened recently must have really really hurt you and I know nothing can really fix that except time? Maybe idk, lots of people deal with things differently, but, uh, please don't blame it on yourself, idk if that's what is going on but if you do blame it on yourself, please don't. I'm sure it wasn't your fault at all. Also, I'm the anon from the ask offering to be a listening ear for you and to be honest, I really wouldn't mind listening to you if you ever needed someone to talk to. I just want people to be happy and if it helps someone out even just a little by letting them vent to me than that's all I care about really. I'm sorry this ask is so long. Again, please don't answer if you don't wanna, I understand, but just please be kind to yourself.

-T. Anon

aw dw no this is so sweet and kind of you i really appreciate it:,) i'm sorry they snapped at you some ppl just don't want to hear advice i suppose still, didn't have to be rude about it. dont worry though ive been taking time to myself, its a good excuse to focus on my work i guess i dont blame myself i blame him for being a pussy lmao but i hope you have an amazing day luv look after yourself

[gentletwin]

A shiny Steelix

He loves all Pokémon, actually || @silverdragon234 || Accepting

◣ ❀ ✿ ❀ ◥ ;

❝ Oh, neat! It’s gold! ❞ He pauses thoughtfully, regarding the large steel snake with a mix of awe and curiosity. ❝ Hm...shiny Pokémon have different markings — or colorings, right? Kinda like the black sheep of the world the Pokémon come from. I think someone said Vine’s shiny.

❝ This guy’s real impressive, ❞ Lucas goes on, completely missing the fact that this Steelix’s coloring is the most impressive thing about it. ❝ Probably even bigger than a Drago! But even the biggest, scariest-lookin’ guys can be your best friend if you treat ‘em right. ❞ He grins up at the Steelix, gentle in his approach as he extends a hand, seeking permission to touch. ❝ Do ya mind? ❞

not my favorite │ average │ cute cool │ adorable │ best │ ultimate fave

[raidensgfmiko]

genshin characters and exams

A/n: as I'm studying for law school I picked too many subjects now I'm suffering I should have just taken something else 😭 but that only helps me write better about how I want a partner to help me through exams but I got none

Characters: kazuha, xiao

Warning: angst? On xiaos part

April is approaching and you have exams soon, you wonder how you will survive with whatever grades you have right now. In the midst of everything you forget to reply back to your partner so they end up checking in on you:

Kazuha

He kind of just wondered why you weren't attending his calls or messages while he got boba tea for both of you, he then decided to visit your home

He knocked a few times and in front of him appeared a very tired version of you, it almost felt like your life was drained out of you [he was like "wtf are you okay"] “are you alright love?” he spoke so softly it made your heart melt and also made you realize you never replied back to him

“I'm so sorry zuha, I got distracted with the workload and I thought I replied but I didn't?” a string of apologies waiting but were cut short by kazuha “it's fine nonetheless I was just worried you were injured or something”

You smiled and told him to come in and set aside your workload of papers and books which were piled on top of each other and looked like they would fall anytime, which is why kazuha got up and organized them for you “just leave them they're fine” you said that while you cleaned up the place a bit but kazuha just hummed “what do you mean HM if you agree leave them be dearest”

“if these ever fell they would fall directly on you and then you would be the one who'd miss their exams and have a string of bills to pay, I suppose you don't want that? ” he laughed at your horrified expression "oh God's no, why would you even put that image in my head hhh” you shivered from the thought of you with a expensive bill to pay.

You sat down and talked with him for a while before he asked you to lay down on the bed with him and so you did “studying can wait exams are still pretty far away, you'll make me feel bad I haven't studied yet” he laughed [just squish him his laugh is so cute]

Xiao

He wasn't worried it was actually the other way around, he was at art class, he takes extra classes to improve his skills. Which can take up to 3 hours because God knows what they do there never been to one wouldn't know that, also because xiao is someone who is reserved and doesn't say much easily and you don't want to pry.

You messaged him when you were out of running battery which is called having the will to live, I mean come on! Loads of work no friends to help you in the moment and your parents being upset no one is willing to help your poor soul not even your own partner!! How cruel is this world you thought.

Only after completing his lessons did xiao see the 20 messages you left him all containing love, hatred(not really) and sadness he was confused and decided to call you, in the end it was a long distance relationship since he lived in a different country then yours

Fun fact: he learned English because it was a language you used often so he learned it to communicate with you easier

It was your exams coming up and you told him about how you were mad at him for not responding to your messages to which he said he was busy.

“oh okay” then silence came, no not the comfortable rainbows and happy silence the awkward, tension type you pondered on what to say but no words came to mind except “.. Let's talk later” I mean he did love you but two years and still no trust development in the relationship made you wonder if you were even trying or if he was even trying to learn things about you

with exams on your head you decided it was best to take a break

You left a message that said “let's talk, I have something to say” you decided to get a glass of water for yourself and when you came back you saw your phone ringing you picked it up in a hustle and dropped it on the floor

“ you look nice ” you heard his voice and realize it was on video call, surprisingly this was the 4th time you both ever did a video call and probably the last

“um yeah, thanks you too” you found him looking confused and boy, did he look cute- sometimes you wondered if he was popular in his school but then again even if you asked him he would divert the topic

"I think, since exams are coming...” you paused and hesitated “we should take a break I think it's the best for both of us if we wait until the right time to get back together or if we find other people I think that's fine too” you smiled at him

“what?” now he looked mildly confused “what are you- no why are you saying this?” “I'm sorry xiao everything has just been stressful and I just-i don't know”

[pourcap]

thoughts: pg chapter 14

(...) some kind of self-preservation had apparently prevented Damen from rolling inward during the night; from throwing his arm over Laurent’s torso and drawing them together to make the small tent seem larger than it was. it's crazy to me that laurent probably wouldn't even have gone violent over this, if it had happened

As a result, Damen was in possession of all his limbs, and even had his clothing restored to him. well, okay, damen doesn't seem to agree with my assessment above lol

jord is probably the least hateful person in all of the kingdoms <3

In the men’s eyes the feat was reflected as the wild, impossible thing it was—their Prince vanishing for two days, then appearing out of the night with a sackful of prisoners thrown over his shoulder, tossing them at the feet of his troop and saying: You wanted them? Here they are. honestly, laurent and damen both sound terrifying lol

'Thirty to one, at least,’ said Damen. love how he made sure to mention that hhh

Paschal snorted. Then he said, ‘It’s a good thing you’re doing, standing with him. Staying with him, when you have no love for this country. i really don't think i'll be able to handle laurent finding out who damen is :(

It would not be like this again. man, damen makes me so sad. i know he wants to be home more than anything, but it also feels kind of wistful, the way he thinks about these past few weeks. as usual, my heart aches for him

'Here,’ said Damen. ‘Let me.' damen recognizing how exhausted laurent is and immediately offering his help... i'm crying

'Stiff?’ said Damen, casually. "casually"... right

Laurent said, ‘The soldiers in Kastor’s army are trained in massage?' haha he's so lippy

'Too intimate?’ Damen said. Slowly, he was kneading Laurent’s shoulders. He did not usually think of himself as someone with suicidal impulses. Laurent did not relax at all, just stood unmoving. i love this <3 but also, damen does not think of himself as having suicidal impulses? "i speak your language better than you speak mine, sweetheart" was literally the first thing he said to laurent lol

i wish laurent could let himself be comfortable :( obv i know why he can't, but i feel so sorry for him every time he tries to hide all of his emotions/physical reactions/etc.

ohhh damen is such a softie

When Laurent turned to face him, his eyes were dark. His lips were parted uncertainly. He had lifted his hand to his own shoulder, as though chasing a ghost touch there. He did not look exactly relaxed, but the movement did look a little easier. As if realising that, Laurent said, almost awkwardly, ‘Thank you.' (...) oh god. i love him so much. i forget sometimes that he's... 19? 20? and he's been entirely on his own for so long, left alone with his trauma that he hasn't had the chance to work through because he's been preoccupied with trying to avoid being killed by his uncle... it's painful to think about why he is the way he is

'Your eyes say, “For now,”’ Laurent said. ‘Your eyes have always said, “For now.”' i don't know how to express how much i love this sentence

'I’d still be here,’ said Damen, ‘with you. I told you that I would see this border dispute through to its finish. Do you think I’d go back on my word?’ ‘No,’ said Laurent, almost as if he was realising it for the first time. (...) I LOVE THEM. i love their conversations so much. never a dull moment, so much angst, so much pain, but they match each other so well that there's always a bit of hope for a better future for both of them too <3

Damen found he’d moved without realising it, his fingers lifting to touch the bruised edge of Laurent’s jaw. He said, ‘The man who did this to you.' does damen ever think about what he wants to do before he does it???

'No. Wait. I . . . wait.' laurent is SO different around damen that sometimes i genuinely can't comprehend that this is the same laurent from book 1

'What Govart said about my brother and I . . . it wasn’t true.' auguste !!! (also, what an abrupt change of subject...? interesting. and, of course, fuck govart and the regent and anyone else who's ever burdened laurent with all of these stupid rumors. how fucking gross of his uncle, when it was him all along, to lie like this. plus, if he's using i*ncest/p*edophilia as a means to ruin laurent's repuation, then that means he knows what he's been doing to all of these boys is disgusting, so...???? i don't get it. he's the fucking worst and i want him to die.)

'I mean that whatever . . . whatever taint exists in my family, Auguste was free of it.' i am about to cry. these books are ruining me :(

(...) 'You remind me of him. He was the best man I have ever known. You deserve to know that, as you deserve at least a fair . . . In Arles, I treated you with malice and cruelty. I will not insult you by attempting to atone for deeds with words, but I would not treat you that way again. I was angry. Angry, that isn’t the word.’ It was bitten off; a jagged silence followed. WHAT. WHAT????? oh my god i AM crying lol

this is so fucking sad i feel so horrible for laurent

also, what a HUGE compliment????

incredible that all this time, laurent has been beginning to really appreciate damen and damen didn't even realize :((((

i had to put this book down for a moment lol

Laurent said steadily, ‘I have your oath that you will see this border skirmish through to its end? Then you have mine: stay with me until this thing is done, and I will take off the cuffs and the collar. I will release you willingly. We can face each other as free men. Whatever is to fall out between us can do so then.' i am SO sad. i don't want them to separate and i absolutely do not want them to fight each other :(

god. what a chapter.

[gureishi]

dude okay so this is kinda specific and also probably not very original or anything ekdbsisj

but-

how do you think saeyoung would react/feel if (during the apartment days), his MC started crying (or almost) after that one (or maybe two? cant remember, and im only halfway through day 7 on the current playthroygh) time where he just... got really mad n yelled... hhh his expression was scary,,

getting yelled out is already a lil agitating for me... and I know i would be automatically already a lil sensitive cos i would be nervous from the last few days (rsd would nerf me) -- meaning i would be a lil more emotional/easily affected than usual ;;;

on top of that ive never had a guy yell at me djvdjdj so it would be a lil scary, i wont lie.

wanna clarify: the crying wouldn't be on purpose lol, i would definitely try n hide it. easier said then done though... OTL

jsvfsh this is so long n specific n kinda personal to me?? im sure im not alone regarding the general idea though. anyways jdbdjs sorry lolol-

and im jus asking for your thoughts or maybe HCs? whichever you feel works best!

also sorry if we've talked about this before i have a bad memory-

[417]

btw ur amazing love u

Love you too dear Four! And oh boy do I relate to this. I do not handle being yelled at well and would, without a doubt, cry multiple times in this scenario (/ω＼)

Saeyoung reacting to his MC crying in the apartment 

He’s never felt like this before. He sort of thought he’d been through it all: wrung every last bit of love and fear and desperation out of himself till there was nothing left but the things that make him useful: his clever hands and his brilliant (weary) mind.

When you speak to him so tenderly—hovering just at the edge of his space, eyes full of something he can’t (won’t) identify—he feels like his heart is too big for his body, and he can’t think straight, or see straight, or make his miserable mind form the words he needs to say to you.

He’s angry because he can’t understand why you’re gazing at him that way, like you’d do anything to ease the pounding in his skull; he’s angry because none of his words are getting through to you, and he doesn’t know how to make you understand that he’s not the person he made you believe he was. And he is angry because he knows, without a doubt, that he’s in far too deep already, and that if anything were to happen to you now, his desperate heart would break for good.

He knows how to lie (it is, in his opinion, the only real skill he has)—so he does. He tells you he wishes you’d leave him alone—tells you to stay away—tells you he feels nothing for you at all. He raises his voice (but oh, as the stinging words tear from his throat his heart wants to crawl out of his skin and throw itself into your arms).

You say nothing. Good, he thinks; and he forces his attention back to his screen (eyes blurry, hands shaking). He hears the sound of your footsteps as you retreat to the farthest corner of the apartment, and something inside him seems to go with you—since the very first time he heard your voice, he thinks, a part of him is always with you. With every day that goes by, that part gets bigger: soon, there will be nothing left of him at all.

With his eyes trained on the screen (and most of his attention on you), he hears the tiny sounds you’re making: shifting, he thinks at first, getting comfortable. Maybe even going to sleep.

But no: you are so quiet only somebody with senses that have been heightened from years of training (years of hiding, and fleeing, and fighting for his life) would hear. But there’s a whimper—a vague, almost indistinct sniffling.

Oh no. Oh god.

Oh god oh god oh god.

Years of agency training have taught him to turn his back on people who are begging, or whining, or crying—but he’s never been any good at it.

And this is you: and his scrambled mind races, his heart drumming so loud against his ribs he is sure you can hear it. He would, he thinks wildly, do absolutely anything in the world to never hear you make such a miserable sound again.

Before he realizes what he’s doing, he stands. The room spins; he’s weak, and hungry, and angry, and scared; his stomach is in knots and the darkened room seems to tilt sideways around him. 

You don’t seem to have noticed that he’s moved; you’re hiding your face in your shirt, back turned to him—and you are still (so very still). He doesn’t remember how to breathe.

“Uh...” he says, and the sound echoes horribly in the dull, sparsely furnished room. You say nothing. He clears his throat, takes an unsteady step toward you. He’s not thinking rationally anymore—not thinking about scaring you off, or keeping you safe. All he wants is to see that look in your eyes again: that soft one, the one that makes his hands and feet feel too big and his skin seem to burn and his breath catch in his throat.

“Are, uh...are you okay?” he rasps. You’re still ignoring him, which is a first; your face is turned away, so he goes to your side, kneeling on the floor beside you. You sniffle. He feels like his heart is going to burst.

“Yeah,” you say—and unlike him, you are not such a good liar. Without meaning to, he reaches for you: finds his fingers (of their own accord) doing what they’ve been itching to do since the moment he first laid eyes on you. He touches your hair—brushing it off your face, tucking it behind you ear.

Your eyes, he thinks (fiercely, irrationally): he needs to see your eyes.

“Don’t believe you,” he says. With a sigh of exasperation, you turn to him: oh, and your eyes are blazing, red-rimmed. And he is the one who has done this to you—he is the monster who has made you suffer.

His mind seems to have driven itself into the ground. Suddenly, he can’t remember how to do anything at all.

But his body moves of its own accord, because his heart has always been eons ahead of his (brilliant and foolish) mind.

“Hey,” he finds himself murmuring, brushing your cheek with his rough fingertips (and he knows he shouldn’t, but now that he’s here, he is finding it almost impossible to resist). “I know,” he says, without even quite understanding what he means. “I know.”

You watch him; and there it is again—just for a moment, that softness deep in your eyes that sets him on fire.

“I’m sorry,” he says, the words springing to his lips before his brain can get in his way. “I’m so, so...I didn’t mean to...I never...”

You shake your head, and your hair falls into your eyes again. He brushes it back, finding that there is nothing—nothing—in the world quite as wonderful as the feeling of your warm skin under his fingers.

“I get it,” you tell him. “You don’t need to apologize.”

“I can’t...” He makes himself take a deep breath, and regrets it instantly as his senses are flooded by the warm, enticing scent of you. He feels you all around him now. “I didn’t mean it,” he says quietly. “Please. I can’t stand to see you making that face.”

You force a watery laugh, and the effort you are making for him is almost too much. His mind races. For a moment, he imagines how it would feel to wrap your small body in his arms—to press his lips to your temple and feel your heart beating against his skin.

“How’s this?” you say. You offer him a passable impression of a smile, and he wants to throw himself at your feet.

“Terrible,” he says. You laugh, and it sounds a tiny bit more believable this time. You are looking at him, and there it is again: that softening in your eyes that makes him think (just for a moment) that there could be a happy ending for him after all.

“I...” he starts. What? He can’t tell you how he feels—what he wants—what he is afraid of. Not here. Not now. Not yet. “Please,” he finds himself whispering. “Can you...just give me a little more time?”

You nod, and there is a strength in you that nearly knocks him off his feet.

“Yeah,” you say: and this time you sound like you mean it.

Against his will, he pushes himself up—makes his way back to his miserable little corner of the room. But he pauses—turns—and you are still waiting, still watching him. Of course you are.

“I’m gonna make it right,” he says, not quite meeting your eyes. Never, he thinks: he will never ever make you cry again.

“I believe you,” you say.

It is the first time anyone has ever told him this.

His heart shivers.

“I won’t let you down,” he says—promises. He means it with all his heart.

[fandomdumpsterfires]

Monstienapped - chapter 2

((Had to rewrite this whole thing cuz i accidentally posted it when it wasn't finished and i was unable to copy it all down at once cuz tumblr is a bitch hhh... ;w;))

((Also, final boss spoilers for those who haven't beaten/gotten stories 2 yet!!))

"...monsties are mysteriously dissapearing all over the place, and the first one was taken from your home village, philip."

The scrivener's lodge fell silent, with the only sounds being soft footsteps and distant conversations.

"..what??" Philip gasped, eyes wide at the news lilia had just given him.

Lilia let out a small sigh "..yes, it is rather alarming news...we are hard at work at trying to find the reasonings behind these dissapearances, yet have only been able to find very vague clues." She replied.

"..Could this manelger guy be behind these dissapearances?" Kyle wondered, looking at the girl. Lilia shook her head "it is very unlikely, however, if that is the case, then that would mean he is working with the people who are capturing monsties." She replied.

"Why are they capturing monsties?" Philip asked. Lilia turned to her desk and picked up a few papers, looking and reading through them "well, as i said before, we know very little about their motives and reasoning..yet, some of us fear that they mey be doing this to try and resurrect oltura..."

Philip froze at the mention of oltura, memories of the cradle of destructions' disasterous rampage flashing through his mind...along with the death of guardian ratha..

Kyle and lilia looked at philip with mildly worried expressions. Kyle reached his hand out towards the other riders' shoulder, stopping when lilia cleared her throat, causing him to drop his hand "you two should go to mahana village and make sure nobody was harmed, me and the scriveners will inform you on any new information we find on our culprits." She said.

Kyle nodded and looked at philip once again growing worried for him "hey phil..you ok?" He asked. Philip suddenly snapped from his thoughts and looked at kyle, blinking a few times as he returned to reality "what? O-oh, yeah, i'm fine..." he replied "um...l-let's just go get our monsties and head towards hakolo island already.." he turned around and walked through the doorway.

Kyle knew something was wrong with his companion with the way they stuttered and hesitated. He followed them out of the scriveners' lodge and walked beside them, looking at their face. Their blue eyes lost most of their cheerful sparkle, and it almost looked as if almost all the color in their skin had been drained away..

Turning to his monstie, he was suprised to see a group of small kids playing with razzar and feeding him donuts, the azure rathalos looking both happy and a little overwhelmed, despite being just as hyper as they were most of the time. "Hey, i wouldn't feed my rathalos donuts if i were you. They aren't good for him, and he's already pretty hyper without the extra sugar." He said to the kids, who looked up at him with nervous stares "o-oh, s-sorry mister..." one of them said.

Kyle sighed "it's fine i guess, just make sure you ask before you act." He got up on razzar's back, the azure rathalos taking to the skies after ratha and philip, who had been waiting for them above the town.

The two los riders soared across the ocean, kyle once again worrying about philip. They had slipped back into their thoughts as they flew, ratha also seeming to be able to sense that something was amiss with its rider.

"Philip..you sure you're ok?" Kyle speaking once again snapped philip from his thoughts. The rider clad in zamtrios armor looked at his partner, having the same confused look in his eyes as before "um...y-yeah? Why do you ask?" He replied.

"Somethings' bothering you, ever since lilia mentioned oltura, you've been acting a little strange..." kyle said. Philip sighed, fidgeting with the handle of rathas' saddle "it's just...after seeing all the destruction and death oltura caused and learning about my grandfather..i don't want to lose anyone else..." he said.

Kyle furrowed his eyebrows as philip spoke "listen phil, we will stop these guys from taking any more monsties, and stop this manelger guy from controlling monsters too." He said to them in a soft, confident tone "and if they do succeed in bringing back oltura, we'll deffeat them just as we did before; with the power of our kinship." He clutched the hand with his kinship stone on it into a fist and pointed it in philip's direction.

The other rider listened to Kyle as they spoke. He processed their words for a few moments and, with a confident grin, he copied kyle's hand gesture, their fists bumping together "you're right, those monstienappers are no match for the power of kinship!" He said with a grin.

Kyle chuckled softly, a soft pink hue dusting across his cheeks "heh, there's the philip i know." He said, going back to holding onto razzar's saddle with both hands "wanna race the rest of the way to hakolo?" He asked.

Philip grinned "you're on, but don't expect me to go slow and easy like on your flying lessons~" he teased, causing kyle's face to turn red from embarrassment "h-hey! Atleast by the sixth attempt i was able to some-what steer blister!" He retorted. Philip laughed, causing kyle's heart to skip a beat "yeah, some-what...let's go ratha!" He leaned forwards on his rathalos, ratha roaring as he flew forwards with a sudden burst of speed.

Kyle was stunned by the shockwave of air from ratha's wings "oh no you don't! C'mon razzar, let's show these guys who's fastest!" He said to his monstie, razzar roaring in response before flying in the direction of ratha, flapping his wings as hard as he could to keep up with the slightly larger rathalos.

"Heh, told ya i was getting better-AGH!!" Kyle said once he caught up with philip, about to lean back on his monstie when a sudden spray of seawater hit his face. He whiped the water off his face and rubbed his eyes as they stung from the salt, face turning red when he heard philip's terrifieingly adorable giggle ahead of him "you're getting better at flying, but you still have a lot to learn about staying alert!" They said, ratha flapping upwards to rocket into the sky, causing more seawater to splatter into kyle's face, also onto razzar.

Kyle groaned as he shook the seawater out of his hair and flew upwards after philip, the two riders flying together in a long spiral before diving downwards. They looked at eachother as their monsties flew back-to-back, and while philip was able to lift up from the sea right before they hit it, kyle was sent crashing into the water.

Kyle coughed and groaned as he struggled to shake most of the sea water off, razzar letting out an irritated growl as he did the same. Philip giggled "like i said, always stay alert." He said "oh shut up..." kyle pouted, crossing his arms and looking away from his companion.

Finally, the two riders made their way to hakolo island. They let their monsties rest down by the beach to dry off from splashing eachother during their flight and to recover some energy before walking into mahana village. The place looked fairly roughed up, with chunks of the boardwalk missing and many of the buildings torn to shreds, there was also, strangely, many large scorch and bitemarks, meaning that whatever attacked breathed fire and had a nasty habit of biting things.

"Philip!" A familiar voice called philip's name, and before he could react, kayna enveloped him in a tight hug "i'm so happy to see you again, newbie!" Philip let out a small wheeze from how tight the hug was "thanks kayna, my factured ribs are happy to see you too-"

Philip gasped as he caught his breath, really forgetting how strong kayna truely was (buff kayna supremacy, bitches) "..a-also, i'm not a newbie anymore." He said. Kayna giggled "heh, i know, but i still like to call you that sometimes." She replied, stepping aside as chief gara approached.

"i see that you have continued to grow stronger, along with making a new ally." The wyverian said, philip smiled "yup! Me and kyle are best buds!" He replied, resting his arm on kyle's shoulder, despite being a little shorter than they were.

Kyle mildly blushed at the gesture, but kept his focus on kayna and mahana village's chief "we came here after hearing that mahana was attacked from lilia, was anybody hurt?" He asked "afew, yes, and the village took a pretty good beating too, but for the most part, we're pretty sturdy." Kayna replied "well, minus the fact that all of our monsties were stolen..." she sighed.

"..do you know what attacked and took all the monsties?" Philip asked "it was an anjanath, but unlike any we've previously seen, as its body was clad in a powerful metallic hide." Chief gara replied "the last we've seen of it was near the pona grasslands after an odd gem on its snout was cracked by kayna's kinship attack. The beast went on a sudden rampage, the monsties ran away out of fear, never returning ever since."

"Don't worry, we'll find that anjanath and make sure it doesn't hurt anyone else." Philip said, determined. Chief gara slowly nodded "be careful, that beast is different from any other anjanath you may have faced." He replied.

Kyle and philip walked out of the village and towards the pona grasslands, choosing to let their monsties rest a little longer, they went their on foot. kyle looked around, the grasslands were completely normal, the aptonoth grazing without a care in the world "guess it went somewhere else.." he said, arms crossed "if i where an anjanath with wierd mind-controlling armor, where would i hide..." philip mumbled, his right thumb and pointer finger resting on his chin as he thought about where the brute wyvern might've ran off to.

The two riders continued their investigation, following their scoutflies when they picked up the monsters' trail, the glowing green insects dissapearing into the darkness of the entrance of guardian ratha's den.

"Guess it's in there.." kyle huffed, looking at philip, who was once again beginning to look nervous. He blushed lightly as he reached out his hand, gently holding the other riders' hand "there's nothing to be afraid of, we've faced worse monsters than an anjanath, and even if we don't have our monsties with us, we'll stop it no matter what." He said.

Philip looked at kyle as they spoke, also blushing when they held his hand. He nodded, not letting his fear control him, and, with a few deep breaths to calm his nervous heart, he took the first step into the guardian ratha woods.

Chapter 1

[mammonology]

Periodt ⟨Mammon, Satan and Beelzebub⟩

—Mammon, Satan and Beel taking care of MC during her period.

—WC; 1.3k

—A/N; Sorry I honestly couldn't write smut when the reader was having their period hhh, so I just did period scenarios, we'll take a small break on head canons 😌 also I didn't know how to end Satan's part so it's a bit awkward

Mammon hasn't seen you in a while, and he was kinda getting antsy, not that he cared or anything but you were still his responsibility. So marched up to your room, knocking on the hard wood as he hears you groaning at the other side of the door. "U–Uh? Is that an okay sign? Can I come in?" He asks.

"I'm coming in," he says, slowly opening the door to you curled up in your bed, with a lot of snack wrappers on the floor, and you looked like a hot mess. "I look ugly right now okay? Don't need to say it," you sniffed as you felt another cramp rippling into your abdomen. "A–Ah!" You hiss, Mammon was slightly alarmed as he sits at the foot of your bed. "A–Are ya okay?" He asks, his hands shaking. "I'm fine!" You snapped, not really meaning to but your mood has been going up and down lately.

"Well if you're okay then, why aren't ya been goin' to school lately?" He idles, taking a glimpse at you, "Because.. I'm on my period okay?" You blush, not wanting to outright. "Period? As in class period?" Mammon scratches his head, not knowing what human problem that is. "Do you not know? I guess you really wouldn't," you say sitting up, your blankets were sti wrapped around your body, "It's where the human body bleeds every month, but it's only for girls! And it just affects my mood and gives me cramps, that's why it's hurting me," you explain briefly.

'Her own body's hurting her?' Mammon asked himself, if he could fight your period he probably already have. "Don't just stare at me! Comfort me!" You say, "C–Comfort you? No way!" He shakes his head rapidly, but when he saw the disappointment on your face he couldn't help but sigh, his blush was settling in. "Fine! W–What do you want me to do?" He asks, his eyes not meeting yours. "Lay here with me," apparently having your period was making you more braver than usual, his eyes widen. "A–Are you mental?" But he couldn't refuse as he wanted to cuddle with you but not knowing how to initiate it.

He didn't let you answer as he took you in his arms as he laid you back down, "If anyone sees us like this, it'll be your fault!" He muttered. You snuggled closer to him, smelling the rich perfume he put on this morning, it made you feel safe and secured as you fell asleep in his arms. "Oi! Are you listening?" Mammon looks down at your sleeping face, you were gonna be the end of him. "Fine, rest well," he huffs, not long after he finds himself lulling to sleep, placing his head on top of yours as you both fall asleep.

There wasn't a lot of information about humans in Devildom so he still doesn't know what a period nor what it does to your body. So he'll ask Solomon, your fellow human kind. "MC's a girl, and all girls have this thing called menstruation, and it looks like she's having hers," he shrugged, but when Satan tried ask for more information he didn't say anything more, "Ask MC if you're that concerned, just try to be careful with her temper," He pats Satan's shoulder as the cogwheels in his head turned.

He knows he's read about something similar to this, you've been a lot more snappier and you've eaten a lot of the sweets they hid from Beel. He figured you were just not having the best day until he saw something on the internet about the female human body anatomy. He remembered when he asked about how you were feeling the other day you just snapped at him, "I'm fine! Stop asking!" Then you walked back to your room, not wanting to listen to anything Satan can counter with your little tantrum.

After school he went straight to your room, "MC, I need to talk to you," He starts off, "If it's about me snapping at you this morning then I don't wanna!" You replied, Satan sighed. "No it's not, it's something else," He continued, then he heard the lock snapping as the door opened to you. "What?" You asked, "Are you on your menstruation?" He asked, you were taken aback with the sudden question, you didn't how he knows what that is but he was a smart demon so, "Y–Yes," you answered, "Listen, I had to ask Solomon why you've been acting so weird and he said you're menstruating, but the problem is, what exactly is that?" Satan asked, you let him inside of your room to explain a bit.

"You're bleeding? Through where," his eyes linger around your body, "Uh, somewhere the sun doesn't shine, anyway!" You clap your hands getting his attention, "How about helping me soothe the pain?" You smile, he makes himself comfortable on your bed, "Alright, how do you plan on doing that?" He asked, pulling out a book, of course. "How about let's cuddle and read me the book?" You ask, very contrasting to the way you acted earlier.

"Yeah, anything to help you love," he smiled as he reached over to you. You lay yourself on Satan's chest as his left arm wraps around your shoulder as he starts reading. Relaxing into his embrace, your pain was later forgotten.

He was scouting the kitchen for food of course when he saw your zombie like state waltzing to the kitchen. "Are you okay MC?" He asks, his mouth full of food. "Just great! The chocolates I was saving up are gone!" You yell in frustration as you start tearing up, you were really looking forward to eating that chocolate, you start walking back to your room to cry as Beel starts to feel guilty. He was the one who ate your chocolate..

He grabs his wallet as he runs to the nearest convenience store, buying all of the chocolates they had in stock and some chips. His wallet was honestly crying but he couldn't care less, when he gets back he heads to your room with 5 bags of snacks. He lifts his arm to knock, "Go away!" You yell, but he needed to apologize and make up for it. "MC, I got chocolates for you!" He yells, silence was heard (lol) then the door opened to a teary eyed MC.

Your eyes widen at the amount of snacks he bought for you, you look up to him. "Sorry, I was the one who ate your chocolate, please take this as my apology," he says. "Oh Beel you absolute sweetheart," you started tearing up again as you pulled him into a hug. "Thank you!" You smile, letting him inside your room, placing the bags on the floor as you picked out your favourites.

You both eat the sweets to your heart's content, "This was really helpful for my period Beel, thanks" you said, "Period? What's that?" Beel asks, "Oh, it's where we human women bleed for a week every month, and it usually messes up our mood and makes us crave sweet and such," you briefly explain, he doesn't get it but he nods nonetheless. "Bleed? So you're not dying? How do you get blood back?" He asks much like a puppy, you chuckled. "Yeah, I'm not dying, it's normal for us women," you said.

"Alright, I'm just glad you're alright, and it explains why you were mad and then sad earlier," he smiles, "Uh yeah, that was pretty childish," you said, blushing at the memory. "Not at all, I mean I lash out too when someone eats my food so I get it," he takes a bite of the chocolate. "Yeah, I guess we are similar in some ways," you laugh, just glad that you have your snacks back.

✧Lumi

[ghoulxbaekhyun]

I have a new header now :D and I think these few new dedicated days will mark the beginning of more positivity in this community 🖤

𝓢𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓶𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓪𝓵 𝓢𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓭𝓪𝔂: @incubuswooyoung

𝓢𝓾𝓹𝓹𝓸𝓻𝓽 𝓢𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓭𝓪𝔂: @pianist-jihyo @biker-minghao

1. @yourmom-jieun

Ji-chan, I can't stress enough just how much you mean to me. You've always been the heaviest rock in my life, you've helped me through so much and you've always been there for me. My dearest little sister, you're such a strong person. The amount of pain you've gone through was unbelievable, yet you still held on for the sake and happiness of your children and your friends.

You helped and cared for many of us, but I don't think you've ever had equal amounts of love for yourself. I know today will be the day of your departure and I am saddened by that. But if it means you'll be happier, you'll be healthier, you'll be better, then go for it.

Just because the person is gone doesn't mean the memories will be too. I'll always remember you. And you know exactly where to find me 🖤

2. @/spy-jaehyunx ° @time-for-confession

To dearest Admin Kai, I can't thank you enough for always looking out for me. Yoonoh was my first everything. My first kiss, my first crush and my first love. I hope you know that even if you're gone, I'll always remember you.

Just as I've remembered my fallen comrades, my past friends, I'll definitely remember you. Thank you for giving me the love and affection, for the late night talks, that time you said you'd deal with my angsty ass.

Thank you. For being there for me, both you and admin. I'll be here for you anytime, Kai. Don't forget to take care of yourself, yeah? 🖤

3. @m00n-purplerose-chatbot

This is directed to both admin Moon and the boys. To the wonderful, legend of a person Admin Moon! I respect you and your writing skills very very much. You never fail to touch my heart, wether it be a depressing angst scene or an action-packed fight scene or a soft heartfelt scene. You manage to hit me with so many different emotions that I didn't know we're possible. I've known you and the rest for quite some time now, and I'll have you know you're one of my closest friends here.

To the boys, (yes I'm giving them all a paragraph)

Jeonghannie, I hope you keep on staying strong. You've been through a lot, dearest leader. You've suffered plenty and you've seen way too much heartache for the average person. Although it gets tough, I know your past shaped you into the person you are today. And I couldn't be any prouder.

Shuashua, I haven't gotten to know you well enough to say too much, but I want you to know that you still have my support and affection. Take care of Jeonghan like you always do, you both are made for each other. Try not to stress out because of the kids, I know how frustrated and helpless you can feel from their ruthlessness hhh-

Hao, you're the definition of that one best friend that loves exposing and teasing the shit out of you but cares and loves you just as much as they do their bullying. I haven't gotten close to you, just like Shua either, but I'll have you know I'm here for you too. Stay the way you are, sunshine. You've never failed at making me and other people smile.

Wonnie and the gang, you're a tol bean. You're seriously one of the squishiest people ever you know that? I'm glad that you're also staying strong despite the past that you probably have. I haven't gotten to know you better as well, but I'm looking forward to learning more and more about you all! Hope you forgive Seokmin for the argument too :')

Jihoonie, I know we don't really talk, and by don't really talk I mean we barely talk at all. You're the logical person in the team and you do your job very well. You're reserved and cold and mysterious. But I know you're more than that stone face. I'm looking forward to learning more about you too, so take care yeah?

Junnie, we may not talk a lot but I want you to know that I care for you too okay? It may just be a few skirt pics that are simply unforgettable but I want you to know that I'll be your hyung just as much as I'll be a hyung to the others. You and Wonwoo are freaking adorable, so stay cute together okay?

Mingyuuuu, I remember the longest conversation we had was because of the engagement ring mishap kshsjsjsk. You got your ass whooped, and I was worried tbh- but you've probably been through a lot already. I want you to know I'm here for you too okay? So keep staying strong!

Last but not least, dearest Seokminnie. Oh, where do I start with you? I can vaguely recall the first ever interaction we both had, when you and Hao pointed out the fact that yes, I do eat humans. Cannibalism never striked me as a way to start a friendship but hey, it worked~

Over the course of a few weeks we've only gotten closer and closer. I can't help but be protective of you, and just feel like keeping you in my pocket most of the time. I know your past, and you know mine. It may not be alterable but let's keep staying strong together okay?

I know your secrets too, and after what went on in private i think it's time for me to be honest and come clean. I think I'm starting to fall for you too, Seokmin. I've never felt something like this with anyone else before but I like you too.

I won't pressure you into choosing me, it won't be fair for you to face such pressuring. But I want you to know that it's mutual. Even if you're too good for me. But thank you, okay?

Thank you for always staying by my side. 🖤

4. @vampiresanha

Sanha and Aleister, thank you for caring for me. Thank you for all the fun times and showing me how to live life. Thank you for calling me out on my boringness and swooping me away to that cliff. You two are such amazingly people that deserve way more friends and love.

I'll always be ready to donate my blood whenever Sanha needs it, you'll always be my favourite vampire. Aleister will always be my favourite dragon. You two will always be my favourite person with two souls.

Thank you for being here for me, you both. I'll let you know that I'll do the same. 🖤

5. @moonlightchn

Admin, I can't express just how much love I want to shower you in ;-; you're such an amazing person, and i want to thank you for all the affection and care you've given me. I wouldn't mind staying up late to talk to you through asks again, twas fun~

To Channie Chan and Chris, you three are the most chaotic pack of wolves I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. Channie you fucking cutie, stay soft and stay loveable okay? You're the sweetest fluff ball ever, I can't handle the uwus you shower me with >-<

Chan, the big scary alpha that I let the chance to dom slip away dumbly, you're a really great person. Taking care of your pack while being so nice to others. I'm here for you anytime yeah?

Finally, the one that I must've wounded. Chris, I'd like to start it off with an apology. I'm sorry that i hurt you after answering about who my favourites were, I really didn't mean to. You're on rut now and I know you'll be all passive aggressive and as long as you are I'm never replying to our DMs but even so. I want you to know just how much I care for you. Because i do.

No matter how much we trash talk each other and no matter how much angst we end up accumulating, I'll still care for you. All three of you.

And that's a promise I'm willing to keep. 🖤

Now, I'm sure there's more people that I need to talk about, more people that have been there for me and helped me through various different things. But for now, I'll end it here. Admin's fingers are starting to hurt from typing all of this at once, but we both have no regrets because these are all the things that we've always wanted to say.

Call it appreciation if you may.

I think I'll do my Support Saturday in a different post, so for now, that's all for Sentimental Saturday.

Thank you, to everyone. Thank you for being here🖤

EXO 🖤: @werewolf-sehun @werewolfkai @j-0ngdae @serialkillerkris @softdomtao @y-ix1ng @captain-kyungsoo @college-baekhyun @serialkillerkris

🖤: @ghoulxjeongyeon @vampiresanha @barista-san @bunjihyo @dalsooobeanie @madmanwoodam @m00n-purplerose-chatbot @your-jaemin @moonlightchn @mafiabossxjunmyeon @xash-axx @time-for-confession @yourmom-jieun (🥺) @vamp-jjk @yourchaechae @kpop-shelter

[startistdoodles]

So I keep thinking that if the player was able to bring Wanderer with them,Henry wouldn't bring her with him to the final battle in chapter 5,and instead leaving her with Alice and Boris. Then,Wanderer being Wanderer,she tries to touch the ink river. Also,I added in a little voice clip of what I imagine Mary Jane's voice to sound like based off your description of it. Sorry for the poor quality of it.

—-

!!! I LOVE THAT IDEA!! Baby girl is just so curious or, better yet, just wants to follow Henry but she doesn’t understand not to touch the ink. She’s so precious and Alice going to save her jfkfjf bless her 💕;v;

As for the voice acting, let me tell you, It took my absolute breath away. I can’t stop listening to it and how,,,completely perfect it is ;;; I can hear her, she’s real!!! HHH BABY GIRL IS REAL!!!

You did a phenomenal job with it I’m just.........speechless and giddy over how amazing this is!!! Thank you so, so much that’s it!! It’s her!!! Accepted!!!!!!

[i-also-like-squid-kids-a-bit]

august: man

charlotte:

august: this was really fun.

charlotte: hhh yeah,,, it's normally more lonely than this,,,

august: really?

charlotte: no, edward comes over a lot.

august: hehehe...

charlotte: ...

august: hey, you wanna watch a movie on the couch like last night?

charlotte: yeah, sure!

august: what do you wanna watch?

charlotte: um, maybe something that makes more sense.

august: so what about-

charlotte: meaning one that does not require knowledge on human study.

august: ah. so you want to see one that did NOT come out a hundred thousand years ago.

charlotte: yeah.

august: right, uhhh, we got.... ooo, here's an action comedy starring uhhh,,, ooh, actually, it's starring marina as the main role.

charlotte: ooo, what are the ratings?

august: um, four stars from critiques and five from audience.

charlotte: ooo, yeah yeah let's watch it.

august: ...

charlotte: ...

august: ...

charlotte: hey

august: ?

charlotte: can,,,, can i scooch over?

august, flustered and stuff you get that that happens a lot by now: ! sure,,,, uhhhh,,, yyyyeah go,,, go ahead.

charlotte, growing red like august: ...uhm... like...

august: .....

charlotte: i mean, like,,, uh,,,,, like,,,, next,,, like, r-,,, uh,,,,, r-r-really... close...

august: !!!! uhm,,, i-i guess, i mean,,, i don't.... um,,,, i mean uh, yeah, sure, go... uh.... go on....

some time later:

august: ...

charlotte: you know,

august: ?

charlotte: you kinda have the marina style, ya know?

august: ...what do you mean?

charlotte: oh, i just mean, like, you've got the side swoop thing.

august, pointing at the tentacle hanging down past her ear: oh you mean the tentacle thing?

charlotte: yeah, yeah, that.

august: ...i mean, i guess...

charlotte: ...

august: ...

charlotte: hey uh,,, actually,,,

august:

charlotte: seeing as how uh, how we're like,,, you know,,, kind of like,,, we think each other uh,,, yeah,,

august: ....yeah? what, uh, what about it?

charlotte, growing red: oh, you know, it's kind of uh,,,, it's uh,,, i uh,,, you know, there's a thing that uh,,,

august, growing red at the same rate: ...?

charlotte: *inhale*

august: char-

charlotte: c-can i,,,, uh,,,, can i kiss you?

august, now very red: ??????

charlotte: i mean, i know i'm wearing lipstick right now, and, uh, and i uh,,, uhhh

august: um,,, i uh,,, was sort of hoping you wouldn't bring it up haha,,,

charlotte, as red as august: haha yeah uh,,, why's that?

august, pulling on one of the strings on her mask that keep it on her face: oh it's just, you know,,,

charlotte: o-OH I UH,,, i'm uh,, ohhh yeah,,, s-sorry...

august: no, no, it's ok, i'm happy you,,, uh,,, happy you asked first before just ripping it off and going,,,

charlotte: yeah haha,,, that's......

august: ...

charlotte: ...

august: ...

charlotte: so uhm,,,, can.... can i?

august: ...

charlotte:

august: yeah, uh, yeah sure go... uh... go on.... i'll uh,,, i dunno...

charlotte: oh, oh, you said i could???

august: yeah, yeah sure go ahead....

charlotte: oh,,, uhm,,, well, you see,,, uhhhhh,,,, i uh,,, i haven't uh,,,, i,,,, um,,,, how do,,, uh, i,,,

august: oh, uh, don't worry, i haven't either,,,, uh,,,

charlotte: so how do we,,, uh,,,, how does that work???

august: i uh,, i dunno let's just uh, let's go with uh,,, i dunno,,, i dunno, really,,,, uhm,,,

charlotte: yeah well i, uh,,, maybe it's like,,, when you kiss someone's cheek, like, like kissing your mum or something,,,

august: well, funny story, uh, i haven't actually EVER kissed anyone,,,, uh,,, like, AT ALL,,, EVER,,,

charlotte: ......oh, god, i've made this awkward,,,,

august: so i uh,,, do i,,, well whatever, i've seen the movies i'll just guess

charlotte: oh, uh, o-ok, uh,,,

august: soo uh,,, about my mask uh,,

charlotte: hahaha, yeah i was just about-

august: haha yeah uhm,,, uh,,, i guess i could take it off for a few seconds,,,

charlotte: but don't you hate people seeing your mouth?

august: yeah,,,, but, i uh,,, it's fine,,,,

charlotte: ...you sure?

august: yeah, i'll be fine.

charlotte: ...tell you what, i'll keep my eyes closed until you say 'open'.

august: a-alright,,,,

and so, as the original poster was losing his mind over how similar this was to a joke fanfiction a friend had posted in a discord group chat and he wanted in on the jokes and was also curious and thus he read, as well as how painfully awkward it was for him to write this because of it, august removed her white mask from her face as charlotte closed her eyes. august tries to copy what charlotte was to the best of her ability and they started awkwardly moving their heads in. their lips eventually just kind of bumped into each other really anticlimactically and charlotte panicked after like a couple of seconds and backed off. she kept true to her word and her eyes were shut through the whole thing. both looked like tomato-cherry swirled smoothies.:

charlotte: sorry,,,, i didnt mean to keep that for that long,,,, oh no,,,,

august: no, no, it's ok, it's ok, i would've never known when to break off haha

charlotte: ah jeez, that was really,,,, hhhhhh,,,

august: haha,,,, hhh,,,

charlotte:

august:

charlotte:

august: oh my god,,,

charlotte: ?

august: we skipped the whole,,,, section,,,

charlotte: what do you mean?

august: first of all, that was my first kiss EVER. second, YOU'VE never kissed me ANYWHERE else,,,, that's an entire skipped step.

charlotte: oh my god you're right,,,

august: holy shit,,, man,,,

charlotte:

august:

charlotte: hey, august?

august: ?

charlotte: rewind the movie,,,,

[kyunsies]

Hello Mädch ahsdjaksdh <3 !!

how is college going? dw, I hope you are settling in super well and feeling optimistic about school and all the amazing things I know you are going to achieve this year! I am excited that you are starting your rotations now! you are going to do awesome, I know it! I'm sorry that you didn't get that ICU first like you wanted but hopefully it's all part of the plan so that you get it at the right time for you <3 let me know how they go, of course. I hope they go super well.

the week has been a bit weird to be honest, in my team I had a semi argument that was properly tense for the first time with someone and it was just so unpleasant. you know those people where they aren't horrible but you know that you'll never completely see eye to eye with them? i think it's just one of those things, where we'll never just completely read each other or get each other? and it's not, like, a massive issue or anything that we can't deal with, but I feel like usually I get on really well with people or not at all (all or nothing person I guess haha) but with this person I've just got to admit that we're always going to be a bit in the middle? like, we talked it over, and I've still found sometimes we misunderstand one another? so things are still good in work and clients, but with workpeople it has been the more difficult battle? hopefully we should get some more cool media stuff with the K-pop people soon, so that's an up?

OMGsh your coworkers are so much older than you! [lease do post a picture of your room, I am 100% confident that you have made it so dreamy and pretty. Thank you sm for telling me more about these operations though! I feel like everywhere is on red alert at the moment when it comes to health and care and making sure that people look after themselves and not put others at risk, you know? the doctors that to talk to me about my potential surgeries too have said the same but it's nice hearing it from a friend, you know? so thank youuuu <3 <3

I was the same as you, I would get so so so anxious and stressed if I wasn't studying or working or anything like that? but my mum is like your mum and grandma, where she gets up early too! but I feel like I need to do the late night thing instead? but then once I got into this crazy spiral where I would wake up really early and go to bed really late and like nap in between so I ended up like having two hours of sleep either side? that was peak wth at the time haha XD so now I try and let myself wake up a bit later really XD ha ha I'm in barely adulting! like I work so much but I don't earn a lot ha ha – I don't think that's very effective adulting? or like, I don't know I guess for a lot of people my age there's a work hard and hope it pays off thing in certain industries? so you're definitely more effectively adulting than me right now! like, you're going to do stuff that's gonna actively help people and you'll see that right in front of you, you know!!? sometimes my work gets out there but I rarely see directly if it gets to make peoples lives better you know? so the path you're on is so so admirable <3 <3 <3

I get you though, do you find that you thrive under the pressure even though it's sometimes a lot? I find that sometimes it does help me, but sometimes I forget to identify the times when it isn't helping me? or, sometimes I take it too far? so please look out for yourself and take care of yourself <3 and when you're worried if you're on the edge know that it's enough for you to take a rest and not be super perfect. i sometimes tell myself to except that I'm probably gonna make two or three stupid mistakes a day? It sounds kind of silly but it means that it makes it easier for me to accept when I mess up, idk, I think it helps me balance the pressure sometimes? i 100% understand what you're saying - at school do they have people that can directly help? or like peer supporters so it's not as stressful or official feeling as a therapist? if you ever want me to come off anon to help lemme know <3 i'm always here for you <3

oh my gosh your grandparents have been able to live long too! all my grandparents lived close to 100 before passing, and one of my grandmothers had the same as your grandfather. he sounds so sweet and so kind though! i love that he knows how to FaceTime you! Some of my aunts and uncles still don't properly haha. it sounds like he knows that he's super loved though, he's very lucky <3 <3 i've been thinking about all this really lovely stuff and how it grounds you when stuff like careers can stress you out and feel like the most important thing when it shouldn't be? what are the personality differences between the different areas of the US? my East Coast friends seem to straight talk a lot more than my West Coast friends? like they're a lot more realistic as opposed to being, I don't know laid-back or if not laid-back sometimes just more comfortable with superficial stuff? Not like my West Coast friends are superficial people, but I think they accept it as part of the world a bit better? my friends on the east coast will rail against that stuff a lot more, like they buy into the influencer bullshit less? but I guess these are all sweeping generalisations anyway... I might have to travel a bit in europe soon... I got asked to go to otaly for some work today, and to holland next month. Idk if it will end up happening though, things change all the time? I have to keep checking quarantine rules all the time with countries! but YAY and YES Europe tour trip one day :D !!!!!!!

you know what? when I first saw you compare bowling and golf I was like, wait, what? but now I totally get it! i know a golfer and they talk about how physical and strenuous it is on the arms and stuff all the time which I don't think always comes across when you watch it and it makes a lot of sense with how you describe how you trained for bowling! i used to cox in rowing and I always used to find it really funny that I said that was the sport I did because honestly I just sat in the boat all the time and steered XD

obligatory YES WTF ARE COTTON SCENTS! quite a few shops in the city where I live have been closing down because of Covid but our Jo Malone is still going strong! I love that lots of already classic clothing shops have now gone out of business but for some reason the people where I live cannot live without their perfume XD I think I'm gonna go in later this week or next week to take a look! with all this travelling I kind of want to buy something new? also, my hands have been acting up with injury so I have to rest my hands more anyway – so might as well look for perfume right? do you have any recommendations or would the blueberry one you've just gotten be at the top of your list?

the exciting thing is that I'm doing a bit less this week! I need to wait and see if that job wants me to fly out to Italy within the next 48 hours, if not next week, but if not I think I'm gonna figure out how to rehabilitate my joints a bit and get my brain okay? It's been existential Covid crisis week haha - I think a lot of me and my friends have been feeling like we've lost so much of our lives and potential during this time and I've really tried to hold in and ignore it for the past 18 months? i'm not one to ever feel lonely or to really really want to be in a relationship like some of my friends, but I've just been feeling it this week? like, I love my independence, but I wouldn't say no to a boyfriend right now you know? I feel silly saying that sometimes because I'm so against feeling like you have to have someone in your life to be okay, but I guess that's just a result of how the world is has been recently?? but I think all my feelings exploded around this stuff now so, I am trying to get back into a better place? so it's not as exciting as some of the stuff I've told you about before, but it's what's up I guess?

how are your mum and grandmother doing? are they doing good? [lease send all my love to them too. I'm glad these help you reflect on your week! they do with me too and I'm always happy to hear from you, no matter how long you might need <3 <3 hope you manage to reward yourself for working so hard these past days and that you remember you're always doing 110% so you deserve the best!

love you lots and lots - 💥

ANGEL HELLO !!!!!!!!! i told myself i would stay on top of this and swear in a timely manner but ;_____; a full week + 2 clinical rotations later here i am on a sunday, it seems this is always the case :( maybe my get back to you day will only be on sundays LOL i will try my best in the future babe, but ofc thank you so much for being patient with me <3

uni is going fine so far hun !!!! i've started clinical rotations as i've said on thursday and friday, and then my first exam is on tuesday so i read some chapters yesterday so i'm not squished for time lol :) and ,,,, what you said "hope it's all part of the plan" is very much my way of thinking lol wha is your sign? i'm a sagittarius and that's like, a philosophy i go by like everything is how it's supposed to be even if it's not what u want like everything will work itself out :') i'm wondering if we are one in the same !!!!! <3

and omg ;_____; conflict within the workplace is NEVER easy bc all everyone wants is to reach the goal you all are reaching and bc there's some bumps in the road it makes everything that much more stressful :( and i know exactly the type of person you are talking about LOL i've had to work with some of my peers in the hospital who really didn't treat me all that nicely , but i still have to partner up with them anyways bc we had to move a patient lol ; like they never do anything terrible to you but you just cannot come to a proper agreement with them? i know the feeling :( but i can tell you are doing ur absolute best ;_____; it's a tough situation ,,,,,,,,, but may i propose something ??? maybe since things are high stress in the workplace, would u be willing to meet them outside the workplace, like a quick coffee meet up and then discuss those issues? maybe talking about it in the work environment is way too stressful for both of u and it is hard to come to an agreement, but maybe in a calmer, more informal setting do u think maybe the both of u could be like "hey, what u were talking about i'm not really head over heels for but this is what i think and do u think we can do something where both of us will be happy?" im thinking maybe will opening up a means for more civilized discussion?? just a thought LOL :') let me know how it goes :( i hope u are all able to figure everything out !!!!!

about the surgeries !!!!! like i said i know it's super stressful to think about bc this is one of the very few times in life where things are absolutely out of our control and that scares us, and we as medical providers aren't supposed to give u a false sense of security, but i promise u everything will be just fine as long as u correctly follow up with care post-op :) we wouldn't want an infection !!!! >;( i remember last year i had a patient and she was going in for a routine colonoscopy and she was scared shitless ,,,,,,, but i was like "listen ma'am i know it can seem scary but i was just in there with the doctors and everything is super relaxed and they know what they're doing in there, you'll be out in no time and i'll be here waiting !!" and that seemed to help her a lot, after the surgery she was on me like flies on shit LOL she was like "THANK U HONEY" (but i think most of it was bc she was still drugged up hhh)

LOL us with our family members waking up early <3 literally this morning i decided to do my laundry at 8am (its only 10 right right now lol) but idk it just make u feel a little bit better doesn't it? but oh my gosh no i don't see u in this way at all ;_____; babe like you're already THERE in the world working and to me like ,,,,,, being an effective functioning person in society is like all i ever want i just want to be COMPETENT and the fact that u manage ppl ???? it's already a lot of responsibility but you do it everyday like you go to work u make food for yourself u pay bills like yes this all kinda sucks but you're there doing it and idk ,,,,,,,, like u being in this position is like yeah their surviving in the world and doing okay !!!! so that’s how i see u hun ;_____;

and i don’t think i necessarily thrive under pressure but i just kinda ,,,,,,, handle it?? like i think i handle my stress quite well !!! i think the reason why making mistakes scares me so much in my field is bc if i make a mistake i can like, kill someone or seriously harm them if i do something wrong SLKDFJ but i have to remember i’m still just a student and a lot of the things that i’ll learn won’t even be in these last few months of nursing school, but rather during my months of orientation on the floor i’ll be working on when i finally land a job ,,,,,, i know i just have to be patient and kind to myself, but it’s hard not having these high expectations for myself bc everyone else pushes themselves super hard (nurses i mean) so i feel like i should be too , ya know? ;_____; it’s a hard balance that i’ve yet to find but hopefully once i graduate i’ll have just a little bit more confidence in myself :’)

and omg your grandparents lived a long life as well !!!!!!!! a lot of my friends’ grandparents are really young still, so it’s hard for others to relate i think LOL but :(((( i’m really lucky to have them around still and like, i feel like my grandparents are the cornerstone of our whole entire family; once they pass i’m not quite sure what will happen ;_____; so i’m just trying to cherish every moment that i have with them even tho sometimes it’s stressful lol ; also BOUT THE DIFFERENCES FROM EAST TO WEST COAST LOL ; i think u described it really well actually :) like among the friends u have the are from different parts of the states, it’s very accurate in my opinion !! and again after all it is just a very broad assumption, in general east coasters have this “workaholic” attitude, they tend to be very realistic which i actually appreciate a lot lol, i’m hoping to live near the east coast when i move out <3 now where i am from it is considered the midwest even tho it’s more east than west if u look at it on the map LMAO and like, it’s really funny bc if u say to someone you’re from the midwest they’ll tell u our reputation is being “too nice” LSKDLFJSKLD and like that’s our thing, a happy medium between coasts with big cities but small towns too and generally just very chill and nice ,,,,,,,, the south of the US is also known for having that “southern hospitality” overall very cheerful ppl with personality and super kind attitude on life :) now the west of the US i’m not saying there aren’t nice ppl out there bc there are LOL but esp near lost angeles or hollywood ofc you’re going to have ppl very stuck up bc ya know they made it to big bad LA and they want to be trendy with all of the fake health shit (celery juice does NOTHING FOR U sorry lol) generally my view of the west is just very fake and i would never want to have my family grow up there LMAO but that generally like, california and washington but like, utah or wyoming or colorado are just absolutely gorgeous and they have small town ppl there bc there are a lot of ranches there ,,,,,,,, does any of this make sense to u ??? KLASFJ 

i’m going to skip a few paragraphs bc this is so long already LMAO but trust me i’ve read everything so far lol ; it seems like you’re doing a lot of traveling !!!!!! <3 i’m so jealous !!!!!!!! italy sounds so beautiful i would love love to go some day :( ALSO U SMELLED THE BLUEBELL PERFUME RIGHT ???? U LIKED IT ?????? doesn’t it smell absolutely divine??? no matter how many scents i smelled after that i knew it was the right one for me ldkfsdlkfj <3 i’m still so in love with it ;____; also about ur lil rant about feeling lonesome :( bub i can really relate to this and i feel the same way like my mom and the rest of my family never pushed me to meet anyone and i’ve always never had a problem making friends, but like, as i’m older and i realize i’ll be alone a lot more of my time once i graduate like i really do want to share my life with someone :( i have a lot of love and i want to be able to show it to someone i care about a lot but i just never really take the initiative to do that bc quite honestly i’m not confident in myself lMAO so ,,,,,,, i know we never feel like we need to be dependent on someone but sharing experiences with someone who feels very strongly for u seems nice, doesn’t it? i wish this for both of us really soon okay?? <3 i tell my friends i would LOVE to be engaged right now lskdjfslfjs :’)

but anyways !!!!!!!! my mom and the rest of my family is doing well <3 and i’m doing okay too !!!!!! i don’t want to bore u with how clinicals are going but if u want me to tell u just let me know LOL and angel i know i say it all the time but always thank u so much for being patient with me okay? u are the absolute best !!!!!! also as promised, here are a few pics of my dorm room LOL it’s a shoebox but it’s my shoebox :) enjoy !!!!!!