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#also sorry ... me and my shitty backgrounds
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some lil slumber doodles for @sunnyys-jarss cuz cuz I wanted to practice using just colors instead of lineart...i have learned that I kind of hate it cuz it takes forever but they turned out okay i guess? but anyways here's the guy!
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cautionwetfloor-png · 5 months
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umm who is this guy
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lafortis · 1 year
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@mutuals if you're curious why I haven't posted anything About The Thing, it's because I'm stupid enough to be easily traceable from real life to the internet, and also occasionally exist in the direct vicinity of the kinds of politicians that could, theoretically, have an intelligence service vetting people nearby. I don't like, have a clearance to worry about or anything, and technically I'm a contractor anyway, so it's not like I can get fired, but there is a hypothetical world where having a history of vocally supporting "terrorists" etc would put me in a very very awkward situation
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junemo10 · 1 year
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Merlin: man, I miss when the dinosaurs were alive
Arthur: excuse me?
Merlin: ya know, wouldn’t it be so great if they were alive again?
Arthur: no? wouldn’t they be crushing us every day?
Merlin: maybe. but you know what crushes us a lot worse every day currently?
Arthur:
Merlin: capitalism
Arthur, throwing his hands up: oh for the love of- alright, here we go
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lord-squiggletits · 1 year
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Ahhhhh I really didn't imagine it, I still dislike Barber's way of writing Orion/Optimus just as much as I did on the first reading and all it took was rereading a few screencaps from one specific scene.
Literally I don't know which part annoys me more: Jetfire existing in the background solely to go "ORION PAX FUCKING SUCKS AND IS A HYPOCRITE", Orion being written like an edgy asshole who hates everyone, or Soundwave talking like an unhinged terrorist and the narrative expecting me to see Orion as the hypocrite for using violence to arrest terrorists.
Soundwave is seriously like "You have no proof we assassinated the Senate, but if we did assassinate the Senate it would've been justified, but also totally trust us bro, just because we could've hypothetically murdered the entire reigning government doesn't mean that we're violent bro come on just bc we assassinated-- I mean could have hypothetically had the means and cause to kill like a hundred people doesn't mean we were gonna kill anyone else, come on bro why are you calling us violent just bc we think some murder is okay" while Jetfire is in the background like "WOW ORION I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE WILLING TO BE VIOLENT IN RESPONSE TO OTHER PEOPLE BEING VIOLENT. YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR OWN SIDE'S FLAWS EVEN THOUGH YOU'RE LITERALLY DOING AN INVESTIGATION TO DECIDE WHETHER ONE OF YOUR COPS COMMITTED AN UNJUSTIFIED KILLING OR NOT. YOU HAVE DONE LITERALLY NOTHING TO TRY AND FIGHT THE CORRUPTION IN SOCIETY." (Jetfire had no way of knowing about OP and crew fighting the Senate's schemes in Shadowplay and Elegant Chaos, but as a reader it's very frustrating seeing Orion getting lambasted as never having done anything to fight society's corruption when he literally did, and by the time he was even working for Zeta Megatron was already evil and had the whole Senate assassinated.)
Like ughhhh oh my god I could have maybe enjoyed this story under a better writer but as it's written it's some "yet you participate in society, curious" levels of political commentary where at least one character seemingly only exists in the scene to shit on OP (something that happens a lot in Barber's works, like with Pyra Magna and Slide) and where OP is framed as a hypocritical asshole for a reaction that's very understandable given the context.
And also it's weird because Barber wants so badly for you to read Orion as some sort of hypocrite for being against terrorist activities but being willing to employ violence himself to arrest terrorists, yet... it turns out the big twist of the story is that the Decepticons WERE smuggling weapons and Soundwave DID lie to Orion (even if it was unintentionally), thus vindicating Orion's entire distrustful attitude? Like, it seems as if it was supposed to be an ACAB story showing how evil the police are for killing people and how Orion (as a cop) is evil for being a cop that uses violence on behalf of the state. Except uh. Then Barber wrote a plot where the Decepticons literally were smuggling weapons all along (and this is alongside lore from Megatron: Origin where we as the readers know for a fact the Decepticons/Starscream killed the Senate) so.... Like, it just seems to me that if Barber wanted to write an ACAB story about how the state monopoly on violence is bad, he probably shouldn't have written the Decepticons as actually being terrorists who literally did lie about smuggling weapons?
I feel like a better way to write an ACAB/anti-state-monopoly-on-violence would've been to like, explore the way that states take advantage of catastrophe/using scapegoat political movements to gather more power to themselves and justify removing citizens' rights with "it's an emergency, we're taking away your freedoms to protect everyone." Like, maybe Zeta passes some law saying that officers can search citizens without a warrant, which he justifies with the fact that Decepticon terrorism is so rampant that officers need immediate permission to conduct raids/searches. Except this is obviously a problem because people have a right to privacy, and probably the cops are super overzealous and end up arresting innocent people without cause (like idk, maybe just being friends with someone who is sympathetic to the Decepticons gets someone landed in jail? Maybe Jetfire gets arrested bc he's critical of the state and has hung out with Decepticon sympathizers before). So then Orion has an actual "are we the baddies?" moment where he wants to stop the bad people, but he realizes that his side are infringing on people's citizens and justifying police brutality for the sake of a nebulous "greater good," and that even though he and his cops were given greater power to supposedly "protect citizens," in practice they're actually doing great harm to citizens by invading their privacy, creating a surveillance state, and imprisoning people without just cause? Basically "we were given this power to stop terrorists from hurting civilians, but now we're hurting civilians too so are we actually doing any good?" Because that way Orion and his cops would ACTUALLY be in the wrong and their state monopoly on violence would be an actually widespread institutional thing where they're clearly being allowed to do bad things just because they're cops. Not just Orion investigating one singular police killing.
But with the story written as "Orion suspected the Decepticons of murdering the Senate (he's correct about this) but still investigated one of his officers to see if he committed a wrongful murder (literally him paying attention to his own side's wrongdoings, Jetfire), and it turns out the Decepticons WERE smuggling weapons and doing terrorism (Orion was correct about this)" it's just.......... like, Orion may not be morally correct, but his hunches/investigations about the suspected criminal activity were literally correct. AND HE WAS WILLING TO DO THIS INVESTIGATION IN THE FIRST PLACE. But for some reason he's still framed as if he's an asshole for this? Even though this is a point in the pre-war lore where Megatron won't back down from violence and has lost his way from his original pure intentions, so it's not like Orion can just go "let's put down our weapons and be friends and mutually trust each other to not stab each other in the back."
It just feels as if Barber's intentions to write an ACAB story where Orion is framed as being too judgmental and quick to be violent don't line up with the actual events of the story. The story is desperately trying to call Orion a hypocrite, but he really just seems as if he's reacting understandably to the events that are happening around him, so there's a real dissonance here where I don't understand why the ACAB story had the cops be right about the Decepticons committing terrorism, and I'm also supposed to see Orion as an asshole for correctly not trusting the Decepticons???
#squiggposting#this is definitely making me very excited to reread barber's half of idw1. sarcasm#i can't wait to read more of my favorite character getting shit on by everyone and their mother#featuring shitty characters who basically only exist to be anti-OP mouthpieces#like idk i guess it's just really weird framing to me how OP is framed as some sort of hypocritical asshole#when like. idk if some guy i'd never met before from a politcal extremist group who i knew had assassinated the entire government#was like 'we're not violent bro trust me bro' i would also be like uhhh. fucking bet then#and the funny thing is even after all of that orion was still willing to believe soundwave that no weapons were being smuggled so like#idk it's just kind of weird to me to watch a scene where (poorly written edgy and angry) orion is understandably suspicious#while another character is screaming in the background OMG YOU'VE NEVER DONE ANYTHING TO FIGHT CORRUPTION IN YOUR LIFE#I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE OKAY WITH USING VIOLENCE AGAINST LITERAL TERRORISTS YOU'RE SUCH A HYPOCRITE#like ugh lmao#just another in a long line of 'everyone in the story treating OP like shit for having normal reactions'#the vibes are just seriously off for the way Barber writes asshole OP. like i love asshole OP but for some reason not this version of him#it's literally the same critique i always have of Barber's writing which is 'i wanted so badly to buy into the concepts he's playing with'#'but the execution is so weird/contradictory/poorly done that it just feels stupid instead'#like idk. it's just kind of unhinged to me that SW is portrayed as the reasonable one and OP the rabidly angry one but like#i'm sorry but i feel like even if the senate were assholes. if the cons were willing and able to just murder the whole govt#literally what reason does OP have to think they would stop there. esp since you know. they're continuing to illegally traffick weapons#i'm sorry but OP is just like. completely understandable there. there's no reason to think that ppl will just#magically put down their weapons and go oh we only did a little bit of justified murder. but we're gonna stop there. promise#it also pisses me off bc orion literally did support the cons back when they were a widespread movement doing protests and stuff#it was only when Meg came to power and killed sentinel and zeta came to power that OP became a cop again#and by that point Meg HAD radicalized the decepticons and taken over and pushed them towards a militaristic direction#like sorry but the cons that existed b4 megs took over and the ones that existed after he took over as their leader arent the same#i rly don't think OP is a hypocrite for not trusting them lol. esp since in that scene SW was acting so shifty#'we didn't murder them but if we did it was totally justified. but we won't do it again promise :) ' ah yes so trustworthy#it just feels like the story could've achieved its purpose with a plot that made more sense#and didn't have jet/fire being there just to expound towards the audience how much OP is a hypocrite
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whiskeysorrows · 1 year
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A COMMENTARY ON THE SACRILEGE OF THE MODERN POET by Patroclus Minh
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dimeadozencows · 3 months
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Sooo I've been obsessed with this au for a few days now and I thought.. why not use my abilities for evil
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These are the designs from the tf2 x Steven Universe au by @lenny-link drawn in Steven Universe's art style! Or my best attempt at it lol.
I think the best looking ones are spy, heavy and soldier :]
Close ups↓
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Also here's just the background; it's the bg from the tf2 lineup as a SU background, I'm really proud of how it looks hsjdjd
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I also HAD to draw Andalusite by @gracefireheart cus good god he has taken over my entire heart. He's truly everything. The myth the legend the icon the moment. Happy pride month.
I like giving him a receding hairline cus. medic(has hair) + heavy(bald) = less hair. mathematics. The first drawing is my puny amateurish attempt at Rebecca Sugar's beautiful doodle art style. (I think I nailed the face and hair tho hehe)
(Your drawings are what introduced me to this au, I love them sm- I really hope you'll like this!!) (p.s; sorry for giving him a boob window. I wasn't strong enough.)
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Aaaand my own design for a medic and scout fusion, Tourmaline! They only really form him when they both feel like wreaking havoc. he's impulsive, inattentive, hyperactive, he has no self preservation, and he's low-key dumb. When his senses kick in is usually when they unfuse. He can't see for shit and has to constantly remind himself to put on his glasses
(scout and medic shitty lil bratty kid + uncle who enables them dynamic truthers rise up)
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(I had so many ideas for things I wanted to post so I thought I'd just put it all in one place gsjdjd, I hope people won't mind :'] )
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marvelavengerspovs1 · 6 months
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Just gonna leave this here🥵❤️‍🔥
Home
Pairing: Bucky x F!reader
Warnings: MDNI (SMUT 18+), oral, masturbation, fingering, unprotected sex (WRAP IT BEFORE YOU TAP IT), a little bit of fluff at the end, I think that’s it but lmk if I missed something
Length: 1.1k
Summary: Bucky comes home from a mission wanting to make you feel good.
A/N: Thank you so much for the request, I hope that I do it justice! This is also a good time to say that my requests are open! I don’t just write smut, you can request something fluffy! 
MDNI! 18+ ONLY! I cannot control what you consume so you have been warned!
I do not give consent for my work to be translated, copied, or sold!
You miss your boyfriend more than anything else in the world. You know how demanding his job is and how much it means to him, but this time you are feeling selfish. You want to come home to Bucky watching baseball on the TV, or fixing something in your apartment, or Bucky playing with a pet you adopted together. You want normalcy. You want Bucky.
You tuck a piece of your hair behind your ear as you look down at the bowl of ice cream in your lap. It’s almost completely melted but you didn’t care. You put the bowl on the coffee table and stare at your phone. You left it on the table so you would stop checking it but it was no use. You picked it up and opened it, hoping to see some type of message from him.
No new messages
You rub your face with your hands. It’s only a matter of time before he comes home. It’s only been 2 weeks. You think to yourself.
Deciding that it’s time to call it a night, you get up from the couch and pick up the apartment. You want to make sure that the apartment doesn’t look like a mess if Bucky comes home when you’re asleep or when you’re away. The last thing you do is turn off the TV that is playing some shitty reality show you put on as background noise.
You take one last look around the apartment when you hear a key go into the lock. Your heart starts to beat faster, nervous that it’s Bucky finally coming home or god forbid some maniac trying to rob you. The door slowly opens and you see him.
His normally cropped hair is a bit longer, curling at the nape of his neck and around his ears. His normally clean-shaven face has grown out to a stubble. Most importantly, he still looked like Bucky.
Bucky drops his duffle bag on the floor and smiles when he sees you. You run to him and jump into his arms, wrapping your legs around his waist. Bucky stumbles back a bit but gains his composure quickly. He wraps his arms around you and kisses the side of your head as you breathe in his scent.
“Hey, Doll,” Bucky says as he closes the door behind him, making sure that the locks are in place.
“You’re never allowed to leave again!” You say as you lean back.
You wrap your arms behind his neck and pull your foreheads together. Bucky stares deep into your eyes and can see how lonely you’ve been the past 2 weeks.
“I’m sorry baby doll, I wish I didn’t have to leave so often,” Bucky says.
“It’s ok, Bucky.” You say and close your eyes.
Having him home makes you feel safer. It makes you feel like everything is the way it’s supposed to be. You lean in and kiss him.
“Please, Bucky.” You whisper against his lips.
Bucky understands what you mean and guides you to the couch. He gently places you down, pushing you back to get between your legs. Bucky leaves a small kiss on your lips before going down your neck. He helps you pull your shirt off, revealing your bare breasts.
“You’re so perfect doll,” Bucky whispers against your neck.
You pull him back up to your face so you can kiss his lips again. Bucky slips his tongue into your mouth and you let out a small moan. You tug at his shirt and he understands what you’re asking him. He pulls his shirt off in one fluid motion before kissing down your torso.
“Bucky, I need you.” You whimper out.
“Patience, doll. You already have all of me.”
Bucky gets to the waistband of your shorts and pulls them down, throwing them behind you. You lay beneath him in only your underwear. Bucky kisses your stomach and looks up at you as he brings his hands to your underwear. He slowly pulls them down, kissing down your leg as they slip off of you.
“Bucky…” You moan, lifting your hips so that he can go to the one place you want him to.
“You have to use your words Doll,” Bucky looks up at you as he kisses up your leg.
“I need you…” You moan out. “I need your mouth on me…”
Bucky happily obliges. He licks your slick folds, humming at the taste. Bucky sucks on your clit, making you moan out in pleasure. Bucky may be over 100 years old, but this man knows how to fuck his girl right.
Bucky pushes a finger into you and you grab his hair. You both moan at the new sensations. You continue to pull as Bucky thrusts his finger into you, adding one when you start to buck your hips.
“That’s it baby doll, ride my fingers.”
“Bucky, I’m about to come!” You moan out loudly, not caring if your neighbors hear.
Bucky continues to fuck you with his fingers, kissing and biting the inside of your thighs. With two more thrusts, he has you coming all over his fingers. Bucky brings his fingers to his face before licking them, humming at the taste.
“You taste so good doll, you’re even better than dessert.” Bucky compliments you before pulling you onto his lap.
You feel his thick cock through his jeans and moan at the feeling. You start to move your hips, wanting to ease your throbbing core.
“You’re going to ride me doll,” Bucky instructs you as he pulls his jeans and boxers down enough for his cock to come out.
You nod your head as he helps you guide his cock into you. As you sink down you both moan. You place your forehead on his, both of you closing your eyes.
“Baby doll, I need you to move.” Bucky grits out.
You nod your head and start to move on top of him. You start off slow, not wanting the moment to end. Soon enough you’re moving fast with Bucky thrusting up into you.
“Bucky, I’m going to come again!” You moan out.
“I’m almost there Doll,” Bucky thrusts his hips harder.
You both move faster, trying to find your orgasms at the same time. With a few more thrusts, you both find your release.
“That’s it Doll, milk my cock.” You moan at Bucky’s words.
You both sit for a minute to catch your breaths. Bucky rubs your arms while you play with his hair.
“You need a haircut,” You mumble out.
Bucky chuckles and kisses you. “You don’t my hair?”
“It’s not that I don’t like it, I just like your short hair better. And while you’re at it, maybe trim the beard.” Bucky laughs at your comment.
“I’m glad that I’m home,” Bucky says before giving you one more kiss.
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star-girl69 · 7 months
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Because Of You
Clarisse La Rue x Fem!AphroditeCabin!Reader
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synopsis: years after your rite of passage, the boy who’s heart you broke just won’t leave you alone. clarisse, your girlfriend, quickly decides she’s not a fan.
a/n: should i stop procrastinating and then forcing myself to write shitty fics quickly? probably. but not today!! this is kinda just like an au of dont delete the kisses but… you guessed it… IDC!!!!!!!! from this ask
thank you all so much for patiently waiting i love y’all soooooo muuccchhhhhh 🫶🫶💋 as i mentioned on my acc i have the next week off from school, pls expect more content then!!
Because Of You - Lana Del Rey (Unreleased)
warnings: NOT PROOFREAD, this sucks so bad y’all sorry lolllll, y/n is a year round camper!, starts out very background heavy but i really don’t care 😭, creepy men UGH, ugly bitches not being able to let shit go, im gonna say sexual harassment just incase, swearing, usual demigod stuff y’all know what you’re getting into, jealous!clarisse YESSS, possessive!clarisse ik i screamed!!, protective!clarisse too, slightly graphic makeout scene, i think that’s all, tell me if i missed anything!!
—-
When you were young, you were thrilled by the thought of love.
The idea of belonging not only with someone- bodies fitting together like puzzles pieces- but belonging to someone- wrapping around you like a warm blanket.
Later, your half-siblings would describe mostly similar experiences to yours- an overwhelming desire to be loved, wanted, needed. Ever since you ran into camp with a monster hot on your heels and satyr shouting encouragement next to you- everyone’s stared at you. They poke and prod, they act like they’ve never seen a daughter of Aphrodite before.
It’s annoying, but it makes you feel good- but not quite.
Until Alek came along.
You were both 13, you still believed in soulmates, and you wanted nothing more than to be with each other for the rest of your lives.
You were 13, and he felt like the only one for you.
And when you had to break up with him to fulfill your rite of passage- it felt like the world was ending. You cried for days and begged your sister Phoebe to say it wasn’t a true, it was just a mean, mean prank.
But she couldn’t tell you that, and there were more types of love that romantic.
While you longed to hold someone, to be held- you also craved your mother’s approval like you were starving. You wanted her love, you wanted her to visit you in your dreams, you wanted gifts from her, you wanted everything and anything she could give you.
So, it hurt like you had never known hurt before, but you did it. Alek seemed entirely indifferent to it, almost ignoring you and pretending you hadn’t said it- but you felt a warmness around you, a dove flew between trees, you knew your mother was there and she approved.
Breaking up with Alek felt like the sun had exploded on top of you.
Being with Clarisse felt like the sun was wrapped around you.
—-
After Alek’s initial denial, he went through all the other stages of grief, mourned your relationship like you did, and you came out on the other side with a one-sided agreement to forget it ever happened.
Alek got stuck. Or went back. He started to believe that you were still meant to be, that much you could tell.
Until that day at the training fields when your hand slipped at archery and you almost shot Clarisse in the head- and she had glared at you so harshly while you ran over and examined her head, gushing out apologies and fretting over her.
She pushed you away, hand lingering for a second, eyes softening before she quickly looked away.
“Just… be more careful,” she had said, almost like a question, like she wasn’t sure the words were coming out of her mouth.
And, Gods, were you terrified it was all some secret plan. Make you think it was alright only to corner you in the woods and probably kill you, or something.
And when she asked the next day to teach you how to shoot a bow, you agreed with tears in your eyes, knowing of her reputation, and it took a lot of trust and a lot of swapped secrets for her to prove to you it wasn’t all some elaborate plan.
But even if her plan was to kill you the entire time, you fell in love over her fixing your stance, hands brushing as you accidentally grabbed the same arrow, stolen looks across the pavilion.
It wasn’t until a random kid bumped into you, making you fall and twist your ankle. Clarisse had this look in her eyes that was so genuine, so full of love and care for you, softly caressing your leg after she had punched the other kid in the face.
And you realize as she said you were doing great, limping while she helped you to the infirmary, that this was something.
And as much as you hated the violence being committed over you, it was the hottest thing you’ve ever seen, and the warmth in your chest was all you had ever wanted. This was what it was like to belong with someone, to someone, with her, to her.
This was what it was like to be admired. Loved. Wanted. Needed.
And when she softly told you goodbye, you had kissed the corner of her lips and thanked her- turning to walk into your cabin, ankle already feeling better thanks to the ambrosia.
She grabbed you by the wrist and turned you around, pulling you against her tightly and kissing you so harshly like she had just found the secret to the world in her lips on yours, her hands on your hips.
And when she finally pulled away, embarrassing strings of spit connecting your lips, she said she was sorry. Probably the first time she had ever said that to someone, and you smiled.
“Sorry. It’s just… once your lips were on mine, I don’t think I can ever stop. I don’t wanna stop.”
And she kissed you again and it was all you ever wanted out of this life- to love and be loved, to hold and to be held, and it was all because of her.
—-
The welcome back campfire is your favorite time of year.
It’s when the camp comes alive, when the Gods themselves seem to return to this place- even Mr. D is a bit more lively with all the pure infectious energy running through the first few days of camp. Everyone’s getting settled, classes haven’t started quite yet, and the year round campers get a much needed break.
As much as you and Clarisse wanted to keep things private, when she punches someone in the middle of the pavilion for accidentally bumping into you, it’s not hard to figure out Clarisse cares for you more than she does anyone else.
And after one of your younger siblings, Cara, a 12-year-old notorious for staying up late, saw you and Clarisse kissing that first night- it spread like wildfire.
But it was the winter, so it still felt secret, until summer rolled around and Clarisse kept getting more and more annoyed by every camper who entered the gates. She would grab at you in the middle of meals, drag you into her bed, even kiss you in public- do all these things that seemed so out of character for her, but she was a different person when she was with you.
Everyone had been looking at you oddly all night, shocked, confused, even Clarisse has cracked a genuine smile at someone who dropped their drink- squeezing your hand.
Maybe they had all heard the rumors. Maybe they didn’t believe them.
But it’s all cleared up when Clarisse leads you to the best seat, the log not too far from the fire but not too close, wrapping her arms around you and kissing your temple.
Your cheeks heat up, only because Clarisse is never this touchy in public, and never around this many people before.
All of the eyes on you feel weird- they feel so judging.
And you’re not used to that, however vain it may be.
“Everyone’s staring at us,” you mumble, shuffling closer to Clarisse so your legs are pressed together.
She leans her head against your shoulder. “‘S okay. Don’t worry about ‘em, baby.”
You huff. “Did no one ever teach them it’s rude to stare, though? Like… c’mon.”
She sighs dramatically, lifting her head from your shoulder.
“Stop fuckin’ staring,” she says. Not quiet shouting, but her voice is loud and forceful. Her voice carries weight.
And eventually, at the risk of Clarisse’s wrath, all the wandering eyes stop.
A few of Clarisse’s siblings laugh from around you, commenting that the stares were getting a bit ridiculous, everyone just grateful that you all might get a little reprieve from the overwhelming stares and whispers.
But, you still feel uneasy. Clarisse kisses your shoulder.
And while you look around at the faces very pointedly not staring at you, there’s one person who still is. You roll your eyes, open your mouth to comment on it- but your mouth quickly snaps close at the sight of Alek.
—-
You don’t mention it to Clarisse. Maybe because breaking his heart haunts you, maybe what could have been haunts you.
You try not to think of Alek or that night, you try not to think of the entire age of 13. You always knew that Alek never quite let you go. He still sort of believed that the two of you would come back together- subscribing to some abstract belief soulmates.
You don’t think about Alek. Everything you do is because of her, because of Clarisse.
Sometimes, knowing you have secret admirers makes you feel all happy, but now that Clarisse sneaks you into her cabin every night- it makes you feel weird. You really don’t want anyone except for Clarisse, the idea of even being near someone else kinda disgusts you.
But, you choose to believe that maybe he was just shocked, and he’ll get over it in a few days.
You spend your days in the summer sun with Clarisse, holding her hand on walks through the strawberry fields, still using your archery lessons to spend time together, staring at each other from across the pavilion at meals, dreaming about a future together when it gets dark and you’re forced to whisper softly.
Alek is just always lurking. Is it coincidence? Is he stalking you? Every time you’re with Clarisse, trying to enjoy a nice date, he’s there- staring at you like a lovesick puppy.
And if it wasn’t because of her, you would probably be flattered. But you have Clarisse, you’ve moved on, you’re in love and happy.
It’s the late afternoon, you’re trying to enjoy a long moment with her, breathe in the sweet smell and just feel how happy you are, know it’s because of her.
The fields are still crowded with kids who pushed off their chores until the end of the day, so you and Clarisse stay on the outskirts. Not too far into the woods that’s filled with satyrs and nymphs who have grown very hostile towards any two campers who make their way into the woods. But not too close.
You don’t even register that other people are there. You’re going on about your annoying half-brother, she’s pretending to listen intently- but it’s just enough to be here with her, and at least she’s listening to the sound of your voice. At least that brings her some comfort, and that makes you feel good.
“And then, he said-” you trail off, feeling like something’s crawling all over you, practically being able to feel the anger in the air.
“Hm, what?” Clarisse asks, snapping out of her reverie at your silence.
Alek is glaring at you, of course. It just feels so juvenile. You had received letters from him for years- ones that he didn’t sign- but you knew. He said that the two of you had so much more to give together, that a second chance was all he needed to make you forget about the rite of passage, about pleasing your mother.
Clarisse squeezes your hand, leaning closer to you.
You used to like the feeling of getting those letters, of knowing you were loved and wanted. But now, with Clarisse, because of her- it feels wrong.
She follows your eye line and Alek quickly looks away, back down at the strawberries he’s supposed to be picking.
Clarisse’s hand tightens around yours.
“Who the hell is that?” she huffs.
You suck in a breath. “Alek.”
“Al-huh?”
You smile, despite how uneasy you feel.
“Alek, Clarisse. From my rite of passage?”
“Oh,” she nods, nose scrunching ever so slightly. “The one who left you those creepy letters? Has he left anymore?”
“No, no,” you say, risking one more glance at his back- just to assure yourself. Maybe you’re just making it all up. “Not since last summer. I mean, he was staring at us the night of the bonfire too, he’s always around on all our dates- it’s just creepy, at this point.”
“Sounds like the fucker has a death wish,” she drawls. “I’d be happy to help him with it.”
You bump her shoulder with yours. “Yeah, yeah Miss Violence.”
She smiles back, but she searches her eyes and you can tell she doesn’t like what she sees.
“Hey, c’mon. I’ll kill him if he pulls some shit again.”
“Clarisse.”
“Beat him up?”
“Clarisse.”
“Physically threaten him?”
“Clar-”
She smacks her hand over your mouth. “Shhh,” she smiles. “Don’t stress. I’ll take care of it.”
“Clarisse!” you shout, laughing, but her hand is still pressed tight over your moth.
“Oh, sorry, baby, I can’t hear you!”
“Bitch,” you hiss, and she frowns.
“Mean.”
—-
Clarisse, unfortunately, is true to her word.
Alek finally leaves you a note. It’s simple, unsigned, but obviously him. You recognize his chicken scratch scrawl.
All it says is:
I miss you, we could be something
She writes him a note back, a long one- first talking about all of her accomplishments as a daughter of Ares, then detailing all the ways she’ll make him regret thinking about you.
She tells you now, whispers in her bed, she laughs and your mouth hangs open.
“Clarisse!” you gasp, scolding her with a soft hit to her shoulder.
She rolls her eyes and moves closer to you.
“What else was I supposed to do? Ignore it? You don’t know me if you think I could just ignore some random dude flirting with my girlfriend. He’s a fuckin’ weirdo, and hopefully that note will teach him somethin’.”
“I mean. I doubt it will,” you mumble after a moment.
She smiles, your heart squeezes- because her smile is so beautiful- and because Clarisse never smiles like this. It’s bloodthirsty. It’s almost inhuman. It’s Godly.
“Then I’ll have to teach him in… other terms.”
—-
Dinner this evening is slow and relaxed. It’s Friday, so you’ve all made it to the end of the first official week of camp. Chiron let’s the rules fade away tonight, cabin tables have been abandoned and everyone sits where they want.
A few Hermes kids volunteered to start a fire, Mr D is busy trying to get the new kids to sneak him some alcohol- but he’s hard pressed to find ones who haven’t already been warned not to.
The energy in the air is infectious. The promise of a late wake up tomorrow, a fun night, the feeling of the moon and the fire, warmth on your skin- it’s a recipe for lowered inhibitions, for everything to come a little easier.
Clarisse sits next to you a table in the pavilion. You’re surrounded by Silena and Beckendorf, a few Hermes kids, a few Ares kids- a big mosh of random campers squeezed together at this one table- but it works, for whatever reason.
There’s nothing like laughing at someone’s shitty joke and feeling Clarisse laugh with you, pressed close to her so you can feel her chest rumble, feel her arm squeeze around you.
“He did what?!” Silena screeches, looking at you with wide eyes.
You laugh at her shock, at the audacity of Alek.
She sneaks a quick glance at Clarisse, who seems entirely engrossed in her siblings’ arm wresting tournament at the next table over.
“Yeah,” you sigh, feeling sort of complacent with it now. It’s not like anything will change. You’re here because of her, because of Clarisse. Everything you do is because of her.
Breathing, eating, sleeping. Basic human functions and the need to survive has only strengthened with the motivation of staying alive for her.
“Anyways,” you smile. “Clarisse left him back this big, long note. All about how she’s the strongest girl at camp,” you roll your eyes, but you’re smiling too big to be anything but joking. Besides, everyone knows she’s probably right. “And then threatened him a whole bunch. So, hopefully, he’ll just get his head out of his ass and then everything will be good again.”
You breathe out at the end of your small rant, and Silena smiles sympathetically.
“Hopefully,” she echoes.
But, because of Clarisse, because of her arms around you, you don’t feel anything but peace.
—-
Of course, life is not straightforward for demigods.
At the end of the day, you’re doomed to fall in your parents footsteps- except there is no immortality for you to fall back on. You’re vain and you’re proud, just like your parents, and you step too far, jump too high, and you’re as left dust on the floor.
Even though the same path had been left out for you to repeat, doomed footsteps to follow in, you step where they stepped and expect a different end.
The night is pitch black, besides for the brilliant stars and the bright, bright moon. It makes everything feel so private and secret. It makes Clarisse relax, makes her hold you closer but looser.
It feels good to feel her arm loose around you. She’s not afraid of you disappearing, because she knows of someone dragged you away you would rise up from the waves and straight back into her, into her arms.
The Apollo kids are playing music, voices hum along, the night is on fire with the crackles and the rising smoke, on fire with the peace, the content.
It feels like nothing can hurt you here.
But you’re a demigod, and life is not that easy.
The seat next to you is abandoned, and you barely even take notice as it’s quickly filled again- but you take notice of the eyes on you, of the body leaning forward to speak softly to you.
The fact that he’s here, the fact that he blatantly didn’t listen- you suppose you could have felt some sympathy for before, craving a life that wasn’t his anymore. Living off of memories made him too hungry.
Your mouth presses into a thin line as you recognize the voice in your ear.
“Y/N, I jus’ wanna talk.”
The rest of the table has fallen silent, and you realize everyone had almost immediately taken notice of his entrance- and you could tell by the way Clarisse’s body was tense against yours- he would regret ever coming over here.
“Clarisse,” you mumble, shifting closer to her.
She hooks her head over her shoulder, shifting completely so she’s straddling the bench, pressed up against your back.
Her tone is genuinely confused.
“Are you, like, okay in the head?”
The table, previously silent with fear, now bubbles with forced laughter.
“It’s not of your business,” Alek says, staring directly into your eyes. You feel like a deer caught in headlights, just completely shocked, too scared to move like it will all become real.
Clarisse puts her hand on your forehead and floats it down across your face, and your eyes voluntarily flutter shut.
“You’re not even worthy of being looked at by her,” and you can hear the smile on her voice. She confidence seeping from her pores- you can feel it all with the way she’s protectively wrapped around you.
“Y/N,” he says again, ignoring her through gritted teeth. “I just want to talk.”
“If you say one more fuckin’ word to my girlfriend I’m gonna kill you.”
There’s no smile on her voice, no edge of a joke. Not even angry. She’s deathly calm. She’s focused, like a 20 pound weight sinking to the bottom of the sea. She cuts through whatever she has to and everything else knows to avoid her.
You don’t know why the hell Alek just can’t let the 13 year old version of you go, why he’s looking something where there’s nothing, and you’re just so done with all of this.
You open your eyes, sitting up, letting Clarisse’s arms fall around you in confusion.
“Alek,” you start, softly. “We dated for a month when we were 13. That’s all it was, that’s all it’s ever gonna be. It’s over, okay?”
“Exactly,” he breathes. “A month when we were 13- and we were that good together? We could do so much more now, I wanna show you.”
“Okay, I’m done,” you mumble, standing up.
And without you in between, Alek finally gets a good look at the daughter of war. She’s pure, streamlined muscle. Every inch of her body has been meticulously trained to kill monsters- Alek knows that killing him would be easy.
Clarisse cracks her knuckles and you almost laugh at how cinematic it is.
—-
You hum as you run the alcohol pad over her split knuckles. Clarisse likes to leave the scars like this, the small ones, let them heal on her own. Even though she winces at the feeling, you know she’ll be walking around, proudly showing off her scabs until they finally fade away. She’ll cross her fingers and hope they scar, probably.
Clarisse watches you with admiration, admiring your movements, your voice, even though you’re really not doing anything special. But, to her, everything you do is special.
“Did you see how bad his face was?” she asks, trying to remain calm, but eagerness slips into her voice.
“I did,” you laugh. “It was real bad, baby. Good job.”
She huffs, as if it’s common knowledge.
“I always do a good job, just matters what level of good I’m on. I think this was one of my best works though, huh?”
She admires her split knuckles and you roll your eyes, finally starting to put some bandaids on the clean wounds.
“You’re crazy,” you mutter.
She shrugs. “You’re the one who let me. You’re the one who loves me.”
“Yeah,” you mumble after a moment, not really wanting to lie to her, tease her right now. She smiles soft and sweet, placing her fingertips against your jawline and leaning forward.
“Did you like watching me?” she breathes, her low voice hitting you right in the stomach, breath against your lips.
You circle her biceps with your hands and run them up and down the tense muscle.
“You know I did.”
“Three months no dessert,” she smiles.
“Three months of sharing with you,” you laugh. She smiles wider before finally, mercifully, putting her lips on yours.
Everything you do is because of Clarisse. It feels so good to be close to her like this- practically in her lap- fo feel how strong she is, to know what she did for you today.
It feels so good to know she loves you.
When you pull away, trying to chase her, she dodges you and kisses your jawline, your neck, and you throw your head back and release the most unladylike sounds as she leaves hickies on your neck, seemingly determined to make them as dark as possible, as easy to see. And a lot of them.
“Jealous?” you say, biting your lip to keep in a moan.
“Just want everyone to know you’re my girl. Want everyone to know who makes you feel good, feel loved, huh?”
You stomach twists and your mind goes blank.
“Huh?” she repeats, sticking her face in your neck to breathe in and out, catching her breath. “Why you feelin’ like this, baby?”
“Because of you,” you breathe. “Because of you, Clarisse.”
—-
y/n walking around the next day looking like she got attacked by a vampire
silena trying to be happy for y’all but also concerned for your health
clarisse just being proud as hell
—-
this was small so idk if y’all picked it up but clarisse was jealous before alek even came along- jealous that there were more campers coming! like? she just doesn’t like unworthy losers looking at her girl 🙄
—-
possessive!clarisse i love you so much baby
—-
taglist:
@lvrue @t-wylia @laughingcheese037 @kroumi @urdeadpoet @colezb @rey26 @harmzilla @elliewilliamsbae @amberfreemansburntface @kyuupidwrites @neverwaakeme-up @shark1008 @liballer @heyimadison @nvirskies @pnsteblnme @mar2ss @restellsss @ravisinghs-wife @marsconer @evangelinexo @randomhoex @luvrrish @rebecca37 @saltair-and-palemoonlight @ace-spades-1
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made a thing
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v3nusstardust · 6 months
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My Love, Mine All Mine
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Genre : Comfort, fluff 🙈
Summary : You had a terrible day at work/school. Everyone treated you like shit and as soon as you got home, you began to cry and vent to your boyfriend.
Warnings : none honey this is good Fr 🐺 #baddie
a/n : bois I saw Niki listening to this fkn song on Weverse and freaked the fuck out so here I am🐺.. my ass is also not gonna edit so v sorry for mistakes🧑🏻‍🦲..
Niki held you in his arms, rocking you gently. You were crying, venting to him about your shitty day. Snot, drool, and tears cascaded down your face, smudging your mascara and leaving you feeling terrified of how you must look to your boyfriend. His gentle touch caressed your face. “Look at me.” He whispered. “No.. my makeup is… it’s messed up and I look scary.” You said through sniffles. “Please Angel?” He pleaded softly. His voice was so soft snd smooth, how could you resist? You slowly looked up at him. Your eyes met with his and he gave you a warm smile. “Hi pretty girl..” he cooed. His thumbs tenderly wiped away your warm tears. “I look scary don’t I? Like a raccoon.. or something..” you said. “A cute raccoon.” Niki gently laughed. He continued to caress your face with admiration and love in his eyes.
"Y/N," he whispered, his voice soft and soothing. "Go sit in front of your vanity. I'll be back, okay? I’m gonna go to the kitchen really quick.” He pressed a chaste kiss to your wet cheeks before you reluctantly nodded, your pout and teary eyes melted his heart. "Okay," you murmured softly.
When he returned, his hands were filled with your favorite snacks.🩷
"Alright, here. Eat some snacks," he said, placing them on your wide vanity. You eagerly grabbed a bag of your favorite chips and some candies, feeling a bit more comfortable. You grabbed some makeup wipes and wipes away all of your smudged makeup.
"Where are your hair ties?" he asked, rummaging through your drawer. "They're here on my vanity... why?" you inquired. "Gimme," he replied with a smile, and you handed them to him. He then took out a couple and put them around his wrists.
"Can I connect to your speaker?" he questioned. "Yeah, sure," you replied.
The familiar melody of your favorite song, "My Love, Mine All Mine" by Mitski, filled the room, making you smile. “How’d you know I like this song?” You asked. "I've heard you sing this in the shower a couple of times... you have a beautiful voice, Y/N," he said, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and kissing your forehead. You blushed at the compliment, feeling a rush of warmth.
"Okay... let me know if I'm hurting you... I'm not the best with this stuff," he said, picking up your hairbrush.
Niki began to brush through your hair slowly and gently, his touch soothing and comforting. The tension began to melt away as the gentle strokes of the brush untangled knots and smoothed out your hair. The music played softly in the background, creating a comforting atmosphere in the room.
“Close your eyes. I wanna surprise you.” He smiled. You closed your eyes, allowing yourself to get lost in the moment.
You felt Niki's movements around you, a sense of anticipation building in your chest. His touch remained gentle as he worked, his hands moving with practiced ease through your hair. You could faintly hear him singing the song, your favorite🩷 his voice was so pretty , it made you feel so warm inside.
Slowly, you blinked your eyes open, greeted by the sight of yourself in the mirror. Your hair was styled in a cute single braid.
“You look so pretty..” he whispered as he bent down to place a kiss to your cheek. “Say it..” he said. “Huh..? Say what?” You asked. “Say you’re pretty.. look at yourself my love..” he tucked a couple strands of hair behind your ear. “I’m pretty..” you softly smiled at yourself in the mirror. Niki let out a little chuckle. “You should take a picture and post your hair style on your insta.. show it off though that I did it.. I wanna make your exes and secret admirers jealous lowkey..” he laughed.
You rolled your eyes at him. “Is that why you did my hair.. and played my favorite song?…” you questioned with a hint of sass. “No.. I just wanna show my girl how much I love her..you’re mine.. mine all mine..” he said caressing your bottom lip with his thumb before bringing your soft lips to his.
A/n : Ight bois srry for the mistakes if there are any u guys💀 ima disappear for another 3 months.. unless this shi blows up I think😭 🩷x enjoy
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cranberryjuice-posts · 7 months
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Clarisse x femreader where reader broke up with Clarisse cause she thought Clarisse could do better than her and eventually Clarisse corners her and demands answers to why reader broke up with her. Begging on Clarisse’s part to get back together.
If you don’t want to do this you don’t have too!
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- a helping hand -
Pairings - Clarisse La Rue x Fem! Loner! Reader
An - sorry this took so long to get out I’m also working on my AO3 series and writing the chapters takes a lil while 😭😭
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You aimlessly walked around the camp. With it being officially one month after your breakup with clarisse— or rather you dumping the girl.
The moon provided enough light for you, that and the large bonfire that took place in the background. The singing and joking was all fun and games but you really just preferred to be alone.
A few steps into the woods you let out a deep breath. Saying a silent thankyou to nyx the goddess of the night for bringing you some peace in this shitty situation.
You loved clarisse, more than she would ever know. While she preferred to train in the arena beating her siblings to a pulp you liked to paint in the art pavilion. Your dates were always something elaborate but private enough that you both could spend time just alone.
Your insecurities got the best of you however. Ofcourse you saw how other girls looked at her I mean just look at her. Clarisse was a tall well fit masculine girl, she was every lesbian or sapphics dream.
She deserved better. While you preferred to be alone she was always the center of attention.. She deserved someone confident, who could keep up with her ever changing schedule and someone who could share the spotlight.
Your final straw was seeing her flirt with Ramona, a daughter of Apollo who looked a little to much like Rapunzel. Of course she’d go after a girl like that— the complete opposite of you.
Taking a spot by the creek you took your shoes off letting your feet relax in the cold water. The silence got you out of your head helped you finally relax. Looking up quickly you saw a deer standing before you, poised and unafraid.
You stood up walking into the ankle deep water making your way over to the buck. Feeling a strange sense pulling you to it.
It nuzzled into your body, it’s horns tangling into you. You chuckled softly rubbing its straw like hair. The moment was short lived— a stick broke causing the buck to become skittish and run off.
“There you are Jesus” a voice you wish you could forget spoke behind you. Turning around you saw clarisse standing with her arms crossed. “I saw you ran off and I just wanted to make sure you were ok”
“I’m fine” you bluntly spoke making your way back to your shoes.
She just rolled her eyes. “Uh huh and I take it you becoming emotionally attached to a wild animal is also you being fine” she teased. Once you got up you tried to leave only to be stopped by the woman with her grabbing your wrist.
“Common Dont leave” she sighed. “Look I’m sorry.. I just want to Talk, can we do that please you at-least owe me that”
Clarisse was right, like normal. Giving a dramatic sigh you agreed. “Fine” you shrugged your shoulders.
———
At first you expected the conversation to be awkward, though your expectations changed when it went the complete opposite direction.
Here you were snorting as clarisse told you about some story with her and her brothers. “It’s not That Funny you jerk” she laughed gently shoving you.
You just continued to laugh bumping into her. “It’s hilarious” You retaliated.
“Uh huh sure” she chuckled grabbing your arms with a smile. Before you could stop yourself you leaned up kissing her. The kiss was short, the realization set in immediately causing you to pull back quickly.
“I’m sorry” you rushed. “I shouldn’t I—“
Before you could finish clarisse wrapped an arm around your waist, the other cupping your face as she quickly pulled you into another kiss. Instead of rejecting it this time you placed your arms around her neck. Accept it rather than blocking it.
You both tilted your heads allowing one another to have better reach in the kiss. After dating for almost a year you both learned one another’s strengths and weaknesses in kissing.
Letting out a soft moan you pulled away, keeping her close though. “Why..” she panted. “Why did you end it” her question was blunt and straight to the point.
You debated on answering her question, not sure if she’d like the real answer. “Because you deserve someone better” you whispered against her lips. Clarisse broke the small space causing you both to have breathing room. “What?!” Her tone was more upset if anything.
“Look It’s not That It’s Just”
“Just What?! I deserve someone better the hell does that mean” she slapped her arms to her thighs.
“It means that I’m not the best for you clarisse!” You finally yelled. “I stay to myself I like to be alone, people think I’m weird and I see how they laugh at me! Clarisse you deserve someone who isn’t a fucking shut in”
“And who decided I wanted someone else?!” She yelled back causing you to stay quiet. What did she mean by that. “You dumb ignorant fool” Clarisse sighed rubbing her eyes. Letting her hands drop down she grabbed your body once more. “I don’t want anyone else, you’re the only person for me— the only person I want. You understand” her tone much calmer. “Please don’t ever think I didn’t want you— babe I came after you because i still love you”
You felt your eyes water at her words. You just nodded breaking down in her arms. “Besides Ramona is way to fucking loud” you just laughed through the tears making her smile.
———
Walking back to camp holding hands you noticed in the corner of you eye the buck from before. Standing as calm as ever.
Your eyes seemed to play tricks on you as the deer shifted from a buck to a tall woman with dark flowing hair to back to an animal.
Silently you said yet another Thank-you to Nyx. She might not of been a major goddess but she did her part.
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loaksky · 2 years
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— 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘮 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘴
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the lowdown — the one where neteyam is shackled by appearances, but you couldn’t care less. 
the who — neteyam x fem omatikaya!reader
the word count — 2.2k
the tags & warnings — language ,, misunderstandings (i love this trope and this is a hill i’ll die on i’m SORRY) ,, neteyam’s friends can be shitty, but mean well ,, reader just wants to love up on her boy :(
the notes — based off of this request! this is another addition to my neteyam content, but ik some of you guys are itching for some other characters, so i'm probably gonna steer in another direction & write for kiri & tsireya so if that interests you, stay tuned! <3
(not proofread well lmao)
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Neteyam is many things; a kind spirit, a fierce warrior, a loving brother, a diligent son. But Neteyam is also new to love. Not quite new to being in love, but learning the act of loving you. 
He’d found so many ways to express his heart’s desire; written notes on scraps, gentle smiles, searing eyes. It was one thing in particular, though, that made his mouth dry, made his brain nearly short circuit, and it was your need to be in his space. 
Even after many days that bleed into weeks and meld into months, you make his cheeks warm with every lingering pass of your fingertips, make his stomach knot with every fluttering kiss to his skin. 
It’d been a pleasant surprise at first, but now it was a need, an absolute necessity to have you fused to him like a second skin. Your touch was a tacit word and he was learning to speak your language. 
The two of you together was normalcy and the clan members were more than delighted to know that the olo’eyktan’s son was lucky in love. But there were teasing whispers, lilting voices in the background that made something uncomfortable pinch the back of his brain. 
His skin would light up with equal parts want and embarrassment when you’d hang loosely around him during evening meals and the villagers his age would giggle and murmur behind their palms about the two of you. Didn’t help that you were an oblivious thing, or maybe you didn’t care, when you’d hold his hand in your own, occasionally bringing his fingertips to your lips during casual conversation. 
And he didn’t mind loving you endlessly when you were just two souls enjoying each other, but he can’t help but tense when his eyes wander and he sees watchful gazes. 
“Mighty warrior is a needy one, huh?” 
His friends, comrades since childhood, surround him on a sunny afternoon. Neteyam pauses his actions, arrow in the midst of a sharpening. 
His spine goes rigid and his eyes narrow. 
“What are you on about?” he asks, jaw locking. 
“Even in the moments you aren’t with her, you’re thinking about her,” his friend Marin says with a shiteating grin. 
“Don’t even,” Neteyam warns, eyes rolling as he continues with sharpening his arrows. 
“Oh, come on,” another one of his friends guffaws, twining a new bow string. “You haven’t said a word since we sat down.” 
And he wishes he could form a solid argument, but you are on his mind, all-consuming as always. Can’t help it when he’s pined after you for years and only recently found the courage to act on his heart. 
“Maybe I just don’t want to engage with you assholes,” Neteyam bites, fist tightening around his dagger. 
“Yeah, because if you open your mouth, all you’ll be able to talk about is my girl this and my girl that,” Marin teases. “Who knew future olo’eyktan was so clingy.” 
“Yeah, like it’s me who’s clingy,” he grunts, resuming the task at hand with much more fervor. 
“Is it not?” Marin challenges. “Oh, ________, my love, look at these flowers I picked for you.” 
The blood is rushing to his ears as his friends howl with laughter. 
“Syulang, I wrote you twelve pages declaring my love even though we’ve seen each other thrice since last eclipse.” The taunting makes him seethe, makes the feeling of discomfort surface all over again and the words are spilling before he can plug the dam. 
“Of course it’s not me,” Neteyam scoffs. “I keep my composure, but it’s her that insists on constantly reminding the village that we’re together. If I had it my way, nothing would have changed from when we were friends.”
It’s a lie and he knows it, his friends know it. But you, you who staggers outside of the training circle at the sound of multiple voices don’t know it. 
It’s like a swift strike to the gut, one that squashes every butterfly that tickled the lining of your stomach on your way to fetch the very man who’d held your heart and crushed it all the same. 
Your satchel, heavy with fruits and snacks for after your evening swim with Neteyam, weighs heavy across your front as you debate whether or not you should be listening to a conversation that is obviously not meant for your ear. But it’s like you’re rooted to the soil beneath you. 
“Yeah, okay,” Marin chuffs, obviously not convinced. “If you’re so bothered by your dynamic now, there isn’t any reason why you wouldn’t say anything. She’s your second skin and you love it.” 
He does, he thinks to himself. 
Of course he doesn’t, you realize, horrified, the thousand and one times your hands would find his body and he’d tense or shy away replaying like a horror reel in your brain. 
“I potentially hold the future of this clan in my hands,” Neteyam says. “It is my duty to endure all things whether or not I enjoy it.”
It’s like you’re doused with water so cold at the violent shiver that shakes your spine. 
Just another thing to endure, you mull over in your brain as the barge of emotions brims dangerously near the surface. 
You break from the edge of the clearing and you’re off. 
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Something is off. 
And Neteyam is ashamed to admit that it takes him obnoxiously long to notice. Maybe it’s because he’s caught up in his duties, or maybe for once in his life, he isn’t worrying about meddlesome gazing, but the shift is imperceptible. 
You’re still you, so aching beautiful and devastatingly radiant, but something is different. He doesn’t pinpoint it until he’s bidding you a farewell, leaning into your space to plant a kiss on your lips when you ease away to beam at him nervously instead. 
His brows furrow when you wave, breaking away from him to scurry home. 
He thinks it’s a one off, something he shouldn’t read too much into, but he can’t help it. Not when he’s so used to your touch, so used to feeling the pads of your fingers denting his skin and the scald of your lips. 
He tries again a few nights later, after finally getting you alone. He’d been busy assisting his father in planning a raid at the end of the month and you were busy trying to put as much distance between the two of you.
“You’re awfully quiet, bug,” Neteyam observes softly, chin dipping under the water as he swims closer to where you float on the surface, eyes closed. 
You only hum, pleading silently that he’ll let it pass. But when his fingers skim your navel, you’re jerking away from him, settling so that a berth of glittering blue separates the two of you. 
He forces a laugh, wading closer to you as you seemingly shrink. 
“What’s wrong?” he asks when he sees something like discomfort flitting over your expression, concern eclipsing his features as he reaches forward to grab you by your arm. 
“Nothing…” you swallow, staring at the rounded stones beaded through the necklace you made him early on in your budding relationship.
He doesn’t buy it, tilting your chin up with deft fingers. 
“Hey, hey,” he says softly, searching your face for a tell. “Talk to me.” 
“Nothing,” you breathe, peeling away from him to wade back towards the embankment. “It’s nothing.” 
He watches as you hoist yourself up from the river, heart in his throat. 
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He cracks when the others seem to notice, slowly catching onto the fact that the usually doting and loving partner of the olo’eyktan’s son is surprisingly distant. It’s during an evening meal, villagers surrounding the multiple fires, when it comes to a head. 
There’s an unusual space between your bodies as you chat with Kiri and a few others and he can’t help but close the gap as something akin to desperation washes over him. His fingers brush the span of your shoulders to pull you into his chest, lips a hairsbreadth from your temple before your palm snakes between your bodies and plants on his chest to nudge him away. 
He bites the inside of his cheek in annoyance as Marin and his other friends share knowing glances. 
While he boils silently, you ache to tell him that you don’t mean it, that there’s nothing more you’d want than to spend every waking moment in his arms, but that day in the clearing is a humiliating reminder that Neteyam is shackled to his honor and if it means making you happy despite his discomfort, he’d endure it all. 
You hate it, hate that he’d let you feel like things were alright leading up to this moment, that he’d suffer at the expense of mocking and badgering from his friends. Makes you feel embarrassed, sorry, that you’d read the two of you all wrong. 
You feel his fingers inching towards yours, pinkie overlapping with yours. Your hands involuntarily close into fists and that’s all it takes for Neteyam to shoot up from his perch on the log and take you by the elbow. 
There’s a hush as his friends and yours watch the two of you part ways with the group, the nearly feral look in their leader’s son suggestively mistaken. 
“Why won’t you touch me?” Neteyam asks fiercely, once enough distance lies between the two of you and the rest of the clan. 
His words make your cheeks warm, but he looks troubled, hurt. 
“I-” 
“Did I do something to disgust you? Did I…” 
His words melt into the background as you watch him with teary eyes. 
“You don’t have to pretend with me, Teyam,” you whisper. “You can tell me the truth. I’m a big girl.” 
“What are you talking about?” he asks, frustrated. “You’re the one hiding something. These past few weeks I’ve been trying to be with you, trying to love you and you keep pushing me away.” 
A twinge of annoyance erupts in the pit of your belly as you frown. 
“That’s rich coming from you,” you murmur hoarsely. 
“I’m so lost right now, ________,” he admits desperately. “We were fine, everything was great, and suddenly I feel like I’m losing you. Did I do something? Are you–” 
“Just be honest with me!” you cry out. “Why do you have to put on this front all the time? It’s just me, Neteyam! If I overwhelm you, if I embarrass you, just say it! It hurts worse when you act like it’s nothing.” 
And Christ, his friends were right. He is needy. Because you’re not a want but a lifeline. A dire necessity that he feels the need to cling to in this moment. This feels a lot like you two are splintering, and he’s about to open his mouth to ask what would compel you to say such a thing, but then it clicks. 
The final piece of the puzzle that he’d been agonizing over falls into place and his eyes are widening. 
“No,” he says vehemently. “That wasn’t–” 
“Is it not?” you cut him off as you dash the threatening tears away. 
“God, no,” he breathes. “I was– They were…”
You watch him with wet lashes and his heart aches as he takes the leap and pulls you into his chest with a shuddering breath. 
“I’m so stupid.” His chest rumbles as your ear presses to his heart, arms winding tightly around your figure to buoy you to place. “Fuck.” 
You hiccup and his hand cradles your head, peppering kisses against your hair as he sways your bodies like it’ll disorient the miscommunication and send it spiraling away. 
“I’m sorry,” you whimper. “I didn’t mean to be embarrassing. I–” 
“No, no, bug,” he swallows, hugging you so tight, you struggle to suck a breath into your lungs. “You’re not, I promise. I could never be embarrassed by you.” 
You shudder so hard his grip loosens, parting with you to cup your flushed cheeks in his hands. 
“They were ripping me a new one,” he says shakily. “Told me I was needy, clingy, and I was embarrassed because they’re right.” 
Your throat bobs and Neteyam’s thumb brushes over the apple of your cheeks. 
“You make me so weak, you don’t even understand,” he laughs humorlessly, body wracked with nerves, with want, with need. “I said it to save face because I never know what to do with myself around you.”
“You—”
“And I know it was wrong, talking out of my ass to get them to shut the fuck up,” his language is a crass reminder that he’s a former marine’s son, “but I don’t think I’ll ever get used to being yours.” 
Yours. 
It’s a sound declaration, one that makes you crumple like a baby because you’ve missed your person, and Neteyam hugs you close again. 
“I’m sorry I’m so clueless sometimes, bug,” he whispers, cheek nuzzling the top of your head. “Love you more than anything, I mean it.”
You hiccup again. 
“Love you, too, stupid” you mumble, arms wrapping around the narrow of his waist. 
It’s your first meaningful touch in weeks and Neteyam melts under the heat of your body, under the heat of your warm hands. 
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ftm steve, established steddie. contains detailed descriptions of periods.
Steve spends the first day of his period absolutely miserable. His emotions are all over the place. One minute he's this close to lashing out at the first minor inconvenience and the next he's ready to bawl his eyes out.
He knows Robin can tell that something's up. She keeps asking if he's alright and Steve tries to brush it off, tell her he's fine, it's just a little headache, he couldn't sleep last night. But then that sends her into another spiral that makes Steve want to scream and throw something just to get her to be quiet.
Those are mean thoughts, Steve knows, but his body's all out of whack, and his knees and lower back are killing him and he swears he can feel his fucking hips shifting. Add in the cramps that are steadily rolling through his uterus and he's so fucking close to committing homicide.
He's in the stacks, dead-eyed as he stocks the new animated releases, and shifting from foot to foot because now those also hurt and he can feel the beginnings of a migraine that'll have him calling off the next day, and he just wants to go home and lay on the couch with his heating pad and his boyfriend while some shitty TV show plays in the background.
"Steve?" Speak of the devil.
Steve makes a noise of acknowledgement and continues to shelve the tapes. He ignores the pang in his chest that makes him want to reach out and pull Eddie closer and burrow into him.
As if he can read his mind (or tell by the look on his face), Eddie steps closer. "You got Robbie real worried, sweetheart," he says gently, hands in his pockets. Steve can tell he wants to reach out for him the same way he does.
"I'm fine, Eds," Steve says. More like he tries not to snap at the only person who knows about his "condition." He can feel his agitation rising, though, with another wave of cramps that are accompanied by nausea and a sick feeling of something gushing from down there.
"Is that why you look like you wanna blow chunks all over the place right now?"
Steve maybe puts a tape on the shelf a little too hard. "It's been a shit day, Eddie, I really don't need sarcasm right now."
Eddie puts his hands up. "Sorry, sorry." He comes a little closer and lowers his voice. "Talk to me, baby. What's the matter?"
Steve sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. "It's the first day," he mutters behind his hand.
"Hm? I couldn't hear you, Stevie."
"I said–" Steve sighs again, harsher this time, and his hand falls to his side, his gaze firmly locked on the tapes in front of him. "It's the first day, and the first day is always shit. It feels like a rock's sitting in my stomach or something and I can't take more than two steps without feeling like I'm gonna puke."
He doesn't mean to unload it all onto his boyfriend, but he asked for it. His perfect, wonderful boyfriend who takes it all in stride without a single hint of judgement or disgust.
"I'm hormonal as fuck, man, and it’s like customers chose today specifically to be even more annoying than they usually are, like they made it their personal mission or some shit."
Steve looks to the front of the store where Robin is still at the counter and then back at Eddie. "Robin keeps asking me if I'm alright, and I love her, Eds, I really do, but if she keeps it up, I'm gonna end up snapping at her and then she'll cry and that'll make me feel even worse."
Steve takes a deep breath, holds in it for ten seconds, and exhales. "I just need a break," he says, sounding defeated, and so so tired. "I just need to be alone for five minutes, and–"
Eddie, who has been quiet this whole time, like a saint, letting Steve rant until he runs out of steam, tilts his head and looks at him with those big Bambi eyes Steve loves so much.
"And what, Stevie?" he asks gently.
Something in Steve's chest snaps and his bottom lip wobbles before he can stop it. The back of his throat burns like it always does when he's about to cry, and– yep, here come the tears.
He takes a shaky breath and his voice breaks when he says, "I need you."
Eddie's expression falls into something Steve absolutely hates. "Baby–"
Steve clears his throat and the tears are gone as quick as they came, though his eyes are a little red rimmed and shiny.
He shakes his head and waves Eddie off, putting more tapes on the shelves like he didn't just have a mini breakdown in the middle of his shift. "It's fine, Eddie, really. I'll just, I don't know, take a painkiller and tough the next couple hours out."
The tape he's holding is gently taken from him and set on the shelf for him. Eddie levels him with a raised eyebrow.
"Is that really what you want to do?"
Steve bites his lip. He doesn't. Work is the last place he wants to be at today, or this whole week for that matter.
He shakes his head with a soft, "No."
"Okay, then."
Eddie tells him to go grab his things from the break room. Steve is too exhausted to argue. He comes back to the front counter but before Robin can launch into a lengthy apology, Eddie interrupts her with a minute shake of his head.
Steve holds his arms out and pulls her in for a hug anyway.
"I'm sorry for being an ass all day," he says and plants a kiss on the top of her head.
Robin hugs him back and kisses his cheek. "I'm sorry for being pushy." She pulls back and takes Steve's hands in hers, lacing their fingers together. "Hope you feel better soon, dingus."
Steve can't leave his car at work overnight so he follows Eddie's van to the trailer. He grabs one of Eddie's pullover hoodies out of his closet once they're inside and a pair of baggy sweatpants before making a beeline for the bathroom to pee and change his pad.
Soon enough, Steve comfortable and cozy on the couch, covered with at least two blankets and even more pillows, his hood pulled over his head and mussing his hair up even more. Eddie's got My Friend Is a Vampire playing on the TV, but Steve's saving grace is the heating pad that's covering his waist under the blankets.
Steve groans softly as he's hit with more cramps and shifts his hips against them.
"Here, sweetheart." Eddie comes back from the kitchen and hands him a cup of hot chocolate. He reclaims his spot next to Steve, boxing him between his body and the back of the couch. "How you feeling?"
"Like shit," Steve grumps, taking a sip and reaching back to set the mug on the side table. "I'd rather take being gnawed on by demobats than have to deal with these cramps. At least I can see the bats and try to stop them." He winds his arms around Eddie's waist and rests his head on his shoulder.
Eddie crinkles his nose in distaste. "Frankly, babe, I'd rather you not go through either." He rubs his thumb over the skin of Steve's hip. "What's stopping you from using all that government money to pay for your surgery?"
Steve hums and turns his nose into Eddie's neck, smiling against the skin. "I wanna get at least one kid out of you before I do that."
They've talked about this. In length. Eddie was there for the Winnebago conversation. Steve wasn't lying back then, but he's since realized he was wanting all those things with the wrong person.
"Yeah?" Eddie's voice is amused. "You want a couple Harrington spawn running around the trailer park?"
"Nah, was thinking more along the lines of a Munson brat."
Eddie stills against him.
Steve comes out from his hiding spot and grins at the look on his boyfriend's face. He leans up and kisses his cheek. "Did I break your brain on that one, honey?"
Eddie shakes himself out of his stupor and cups Steve's face, pressing him into the couch so he can kiss him silly.
"I'm gonna give you so many Munson brats, baby," he promises between leaving kisses all over Steve's face and Steve's giggles. "You won't even know what hit ya by the time I'm through with you."
Steve guffaws and lets Eddie cover him with kisses and love.
"I'll hold you to that, baby, don't worry."
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saccharine-dean · 4 months
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listen i'm so sorry to whoever wrote 5x09 but spn meta would have been infinitely funnier if they gave us cosplayers who actually acted like we do. dean asks a teenage girl why she's cosplaying the eldest winchester and she laughs and goes "oh well you know, my dad doesn't love me either" and dean takes psychic damage. and then she goes "also i'm bisexual" and sam chokes on his shitty con salad in the background while dean tries (fails) not to start hyperventilating
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AITA for tricking my grandma into misgendering her cat?
Background: my (19F) grandma (67F) is a southern baptist and pretty conservative. My cousin (Matt, 24M) is trans, he came out to his parents and mine about two years ago because he knew we would be supportive, but he waited until he was on T a couple months and was mostly transitioned socially before he officially came out to our less supportive relatives, like my grandma.
Since Matt came out to everyone else (which he did by showing up at family Christmas with a “hello my name is” sticker on, which I thought was hilarious) my grandma has refused to use his correct pronouns, name, or anything, saying “it’s hard to switch” as an excuse. Matt has cut off contact and everyone else in the family just kind of avoids talking about him around her.
I am in a weird situation because my family lives the next street over from where she does, and we have always been pretty close. Since she started being so shitty about Matt, though, I’ve put more distance and just stay polite when she’s over.
Okay so now to the AITA part. About two months ago my grandma wanted to adopt a cat, and my best friend volunteers at an animal shelter so we were helping her. We showed her pictures of some of the cats and she saw an older male who was all black with longer fur and said she wanted to adopt “her.” I started to correct her saying it was a male cat, and then realized the opportunity I had so I kept my mouth shut. I made a point to handle all the adoption stuff for my grandma so she never saw anything indicating the cat’s male-ness, and then brought home her new “female” cat, pink collar and all.
Last week “Miss Kitty” (such a creative name) got a paw injury and at the vet they told my grandma the cat was male. My grandma told me and my parents about it when she was over for the Fourth of July (we had family and friends over for barbecue, including Matt’s parents). I made a point from there on to continue using “she” for the cat and still calling “Miss Kitty” instead of “Mister Kitty.” It took her a minute to notice but finally she called me out and said “he’s a boy, stop saying she.”
I immediately snapped back with “oh so it’s easy for you to switch the name and pronouns of your cat but not your own grandson?” Everyone got quiet and she got all flustered, trying to say it’s different, but I just said “oh okay, so you put more effort into using the right words for a cat who doesn’t even know English, got it.”
My mom told me to stop and leave it alone. I said “I’m just saying, it’s pretty clear who she cares about more.” And then my mom told me to leave the table if I was going to act like that. I just got up and took my plate in the kitchen and finished eating.
After everyone left my mom lit into me and told me that what I said was cruel. I said I was just teaching her a lesson and that maybe now she would think about it different. My mom said that I just made things worse and humiliated her on purpose in front of everyone. My dad had been quiet but then just started laughing. He realized that I had been playing the long game, and it wasn’t a mix up at the shelter- I led my grandma to believe the cat was female. He basically said “that was wrong but also hilarious” and now my mom is mad at both me and my dad. When Matt’s parents told him he thought it was super funny and said he isn’t mad at all.
My mom wants me to apologize, but I am not sorry about what I said. I don’t know if I should feel bad about tricking my grandma, because I didn’t technically outright lie, I just didn’t correct her when she assumed the cat was female. AITA?
What are these acronyms?
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