#also we were fully out of time and i couldn't think about it fast enough

[honeybeeofficial]

post ocd assessment, this therapist goes "so do you think an official diagnosis would be helpful to you?" and I'm just like girl I don't know. isnt that your job

[luvchaew]

unwrapping!

jay has been your best friend for ages, but when touches started to linger and jealousy started to take all over him, you decided to give him a little surprise on his birthday. (feat zb1 hanbin, enhypen sunoo, katseye lara, mentions of riize wonbin)

“you really think i didn't know you had a thing for me all this time?” bestfriend!jay x pervy!reader, f2pl wc𓈒 3k— not proofread! ✴ cursing, making out, unprotected sex (don't ppl), oral (m. receiving), creampie, p in v, praise & degradation kink, breeding kink, jay is a switch, banter, slightly fluffy, pet names (jongseongie, baby, darling, princess..), mdni!

happy birthday jongseong! crazy to think you're already all grown up — he's finally 23 guys, are we gonna be okay?

𝑚. 𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍

jay had always been there.

if not for you, with you, for sure.

you didn't really remember what it felt like not having him around since you were about 12, except those past weeks; since you showed up with your situationship to a weekend barbecue, at least.

he'd been ignoring you — not really ignoring, but making it clear that something was up.

5 days ago, when you handed him the mayonnaise, his fingers brushed over yours carefully, with so much caution put into it that it was almost deliberate, like he was touching a stranger. a week ago, when you sent him a very funny electric guitar-related meme via dm, he didn't reply. worse, he didn't even react with a laughing emoji or something. things were definitely off, but you couldn't pretend you didn't know, not if you dig deep into your mind.

what you actually didn't know, but got hold of during a phone call with your friend, sunoo, was that jay accidentally overheard your conversation about wonbin — your brand new situationship — and how good he was in bed. that clarified a lot, if you were being honest.

you couldn't deny that he always paid too much attention to you. that his gaze lingered way more than it should. that some of your sleepovers at his house almost turned into something else if it wasn't for the solemn string that still kept you sane. that the silent acknowledgement of his feelings were always there, but you were simply too stubborn to admit it, to say that maybe, just maybe, you also wanted to be more than friends with him.

since there was this possibility that he was jealous, that he didn't want you with anyone else, you got thrilled, perhaps simply carried away, you couldn't tell. this wait has been killing you since you were 18, and if he wasn't brave enough to act, you were.

the idea at first was hanbin's, when he had already had too much beer and his messy hair covered half of his face. your roommate, lara, was there too, and perhaps it was the alcohol you drank while watching that baseball match, but you soon found yourself excited for it, planning everything amusingly fast.

“okay, so you're gonna be dressed in what?” lara pointed out, cleaning her slender fingers — that were full of nacho's orange bran, by the way. — on her pants.

“wait, there's a need for clothing?”

“hanbin! i'm not fully strip teasing in front of my best friend all of sudden, it has to be more subtle. let's focus”

“aren’t you going to do the ’let’s end up waiting’ thing? i was just trying to help, sorry” he pouted, raising his hands in cynical defeat.

“i think a ribbon tied around me would be good. something like ‘come and unwrap your birthday present’. ”

lara exclaimed, visibly pleased, her braided hair moving as she bounced slightly on the couch, she also helped giving more ideas, suggesting some ridiculous stuff like putting some background sexual music to play when jay was supposed to enter the room during his party — she probably meant Chase Atlantic, and it was soon discarded. — by dawn, sunoo also appeared, his eyes swollen from sleep but his mind working fast, brainstorming with you as he giggled playfully.

all of them waited all their life for this, didn't they?

“let's go through the plan once more” you started, biting your lips, “i’m gonna pretend to be nonchalant about his birthday, and at first not show up to his party. around 8pm, sunoo is helping me to sneak into his room and lara is going to tell him to go upstairs and search for something, or someone. when he enters the room, i'm gonna be there,”

“with a ribbon around you, do not forget” hanbin added, resting his chin on his hands as he listened attentively.

“yeah, there's that, too. and navy blue set of lingerie, god—, where was my mind at?”

“no backing out now, misses courage, we're fucking gonna do it and you're in. because there's technically no plan without you and we need that thrill” your roommate encouraged you, and even if there was pressure, you felt way more enthusiastic about it than what you should, hence why you just continued, nodding.

“i know, i know. then you're closing the door and we're gonna, um, have a lil’ fun”

they all excitedly laughed, and for a split up second, you swore sunoo would stand up and start jumping — it was almost his second nature to do so, and it honestly wouldn't be a surprise.

“but what if he refuses? aren't we going too far?” you spoke up, letting your insecurities show for a minute. you would be so embarrassed if he just ran away. if he said he didn't want that. and you knew damn well it would ruin your friendship one way or another.

“oh, stop. i have heard that guy moaning your name while showering more than once. it's gonna be fine” and perhaps it was the worst decision you've ever made, but you chose to believe them. are you this slutty to enjoy dragging your childhood best friend to a hook up on his birthday party knowing that he has no willpower to deny it whatsoever?

apparently yes.

you could blame it on the alcohol, yes you could, but when the days passed and the idea were still standing, your mind flying back to it every time someone mentioned sex?

there was no one to blame anymore. you just had to embrace your natural-pervy self and wait for everything to happen naturally — only with a little helping hand coming from you, of course.

because you wanted that to be the best birthday gift he's received his whole life.

one could call it obsession, concern, anxiety, whatever, but the only thing you knew was that the first thing that came to your mind the moment you woke up on the 20th was: “it’s today”.

throughout breakfast, you overthinked and overthinked about the small birthday text you'd sent him. you honestly couldn't remember when it was the last time you didn't send jay a wholesome message on his anniversary, however today would be different. today would be a new start — or maybe an end, depending on how things would go.

but you were positive.

you ended up deciding on a simple ‘happy 23, jongseongie’ and a white heart right next to it, which he visualized within minutes and didn't reply. you were expecting it, but it hurt either way, and maybe you kept staring at your phone screen for too long waiting for a signal.

despite the tension throughout the day, before you knew you were already barging inside his crowded house, sunoo by your side, lingerie clinging to your skin sinfully as a tight black dress hid it.

as you entered the room, you were quick to get rid off your dress and lay down on his bed, being extra careful to show enough but not too much in the direction of the door. as you did it, you were embarrassed to find yourself already soaked, he shouldn't be affecting you this much, should he?

you soon heard steps approaching and momentarily panicked. the loud conversation of the house and the noise of yells faded away, everything shifting completely in the atmosphere when he entered the bedroom, eyes darkening when his gaze fell on you.

you hadn't seen him in days, and saying he looks good was an understatement. broad shoulders, tight jeans perfectly fitting him, a strand of messy hair falling on his forehead.

jay called your name lowly, looking confused, but stepping forward, closer, dangerously closer.

“come and unwrap your birthday present, won't you?” you tease, voice dripping with honey and fake innocence given the position you were in: legs slightly opened, head tilted, body barely hidden and biting your bottom lip.

for a second, you thought he was going to turn around and run, and you considered apologizing, but then he was on top of you in no time, crawling to the bed and pinning your wrists on the mattress on top of your head.

it was everything he'd ever dreamed of. you on his bed, deprived of clothes, completely on his mercy.

“fuck, y/n— that's what you planned acting all bratty this whole time?” he groaned, sounding devastated.

“um, surprise?” you darkly chuckled, and jay searched for your brown doe-eyes. when he took it all in, he held your waist with his free hand and pulled you in.

it wasn’t a cute, soft kiss, but one that left you breathless as fast as it started. his lips worked fast on yours, the movements of his head leaving you dizzy. he pressed further, opening your mouth and sliding his tongue inside, exploring your warmness as if he had been starved.

you felt every single hidden feeling dissipating, every dangerous gaze making sense, every time he’d called you ‘princess’ — as a joke, as you'd tell yourself — meaning much more than it did before. and now you believed your friends when they insisted that he has been liking you for ages, because the force in which he kissed you was different.

you'd never been kissed like that before.

you ran your hands through his neck, gripping firmly in an attempt to ground yourself. you hummed softly, his grip tightened and suddenly the shortness of breath was present, leaving you separated for a while.

he looked deep into your eyes, breathing heavily, and only then scanned your body, groaning as he saw the navy blue lacy panties and the wet mark there.

“god, you look beautiful—” he hissed, amused. he freed your wrists and messily untied the ribbon, whereas you swore he was trembling slightly. the soft fabric fell down on the floor as he was quick to cup your barely covered tits, admiring them. jay would've been fast to unbutton your bra and give them the respectful attention, but it wasn't what you wanted now, you wanted him to feel good. it was a birthday surprise, after all.

“jongseongie, let me take care of you first,” he looked at you, wide-eyed, as if the idea alone threatened something inside him. you propped yourself on one elbow and sat up, slowly pushing him to lay down on the bed with the tip of your fingers.

he stiffened for a moment, but soon layed down, closing his eyes, trying to find sanity. you position yourself between his legs, spreading it open.

“ngh, too much clothes, take it off” you pleaded, and he obeyed, because who was he to deny you a wish like that?

as he took out his shirt, you almost crawled on top of him to leave lingering kisses everywhere: his jaw, collarbone, neck, shoulders. sometimes you would suck on it slightly just to feel how he shaked when you nibbled a specific spot right between his shoulder and neck. you didn't really overthink it, but jay was overly sensitive, trembling, panting, humming.

your nails scratched his abs, worshipping them. you’d already seen jay shirtless, when he was swimming, or when it was too hot and he sweated heavily so it would be excusable to take it off, but this was different, hotter, better. you earned beautiful noises that sounded more like the choir that opened heaven's gates, and when you settled beneath him, touching his clothed prominent crotch, work had to start.

“be good f‘me, hm jay? let me take you?” you whispered, patting his bulge teasingly, feeling it get harder with each stroke. he squirmed, eyelids fluttering close. “i need words, baby”

he opened his eyes slowly, pupils dilated. when he spoke up, his voice was low, hoarse, strained, “yeah, y/n, fucking gimme the best birthday gift i've ever received”

you smirked, satisfied, and gently lowered his pants and boxer, removing it. his hardened member instantly flew forward when it was released, the tip glistening. you hummed and leaned in, stroking it once, twice, three times, until he began to whimper, impatient.

you chuckled, spitting on it and finally leaving kitten licks on the tip, tasting the precum that coated his dick. his hand came to grip your hair in a lazy ponytail, while the other rested under his head. when he pressed further, leaving you no choice but take him in, you tried your best not to gag at the sudden movement, eyes closing.

he was big, you couldn't deny it whatsoever, but the biggest hardship was that he was thick, and it barely fit inside your mouth, competing for space with your tongue.

you swirled your tongue around it and started to suck slowly, feeling how he hit the roof of your mouth continuously.

you hummed around his dick, sending electric waves through his body and he groaned, wrecked, going rougher now.

“continue like that, shit princess—” he lowly muttered, and you drooled all over his shaft, saliva dripping down from your mouth and covering your face. you were a mess, and you knew that, perhaps was even proud of it, and when tears fell down on your face, the salty liquid combining with saliva and precum, jay was sure he didn't deserve that. you looked so damn pretty.

but he only continued, feeling his climax approaching embarrassingly fast, because you were his gift anyway.

his hands moved faster and his hips bucked forward. you looked at him through eyelashes and the vision you had was a crime to be for free: head fell back, lips slightly parted, messy hair, adam’s apple bobbing.

his thighs trembled next to you, and with a deeper thrust, his hot cum was shot at the back of your mouth, leaving you no option but to swallow it.

his seed spread messily along your mouth, his tip shining red, and as he drove himself through the orgasm, still fucking your glossy lips, you moaned unconsciously — high-pitched, dark.

you swore that the view alone could've finished you, and you were almost coming undone when he sat up, still heavily breathing, and pushed you down on the mattress, flooding you with his scent.

his uneven breath hovered just above your ear as he stared down at you, dark eyes scanning you in a whole. his fingers traveled to your soaking wet core, groaning when he entered in contact with it, “so wet, so gorgeous—” he tossed your lacy panties to the side, sliding a finger and stroking your cunt and bud all together. you moaned at the touch, a shiver running through your spine. he continued teasing, never giving in, breathing heavily, “do you think you deserve being fucked after bringing that boy around, hm princess?”

“he was no good so you had to come to me, isn't that it?” his words made you squirm, clenching around nothing as he continued teasing, fingering but never entering, his still-hard cock hitting your thigh at the proximity.

he was, at the same time, overwhelmingly close, but not close enough, not touching you were you wanted him to, where you needed him to.

you rolled your hips, desperate to create friction, and he only chuckled mockingly, his grin growing wider, darker.

“please— oh my goodness, please”

“please what, darling?” he gripped your inner thighs firmly, spreading yourself open, like you were an open book that only he could read.

“f-fuck me, ruin me, please, jongseongie!”

he let out a sound so lustful you weren't sure what it was, and snapped. he captured your lips in a kiss, now raw, messy, rushed, where he could taste himself on your tongue, and pumped his fingers in and out of you, stretching you open.

you moaned against his mouth, and right when he began to find your g-spot, curling perfectly, he pulled out. you whimpered at the loss, but soon, without any warning, he entered you completely. the stretch was overwhelming, and you felt him deep in your stomach, sitting inside for a while before thrusting fast. your jaw opened in a silent scream, and you held on to his scalp for dear life. it felt so good, your bodies intertwined like a limbo, damp of sweat covering his forehead, his dick hitting you so deep you saw stars. why haven't you done this before?

he hid his head on the crook of your neck, biting and nibbling on the sensitive spot there, the sensation sending butterflies on your stomach.

because it was supposed to be just sex, but his hands on your waist? hickeys left by him appearing on your collarbone? his name being recited as a chant as he was buried deep in you?

it felt more than just hooking up.

and maybe it was, but you were too afraid to admit, or perhaps it simply didn't matter now. you'd always been inconsequential.

as his groans started to get louder, his thrusts faltered, losing its pace and coming out messier, breaking your limits and surpassing where was the max you thought you could handle.

“princess, do you feel me here? going s’ deep”

“taking me in so good. letting me use you just as i want, you're the prettiest gift ever aren't you?”

“do you feel my cock hitting this perfect pussy?”

tears started to fall down your face again, but now they were saltier, the pain growing overwhelming when the knot on your stomach snapped, releasing what felt like a whole bottle of transparent cum.

jay didn't stop for a second even after your liquid was shot on your bodies, only holding your sides harder as he chased his own release. one could say he was possessed, eyebrows furrowing, eyes empty, mouth open.

“damn— t’much, too much, ngh” you cried out, earning a chuckle from him, as he muttered how you should take it because it was his birthday after all.

his thrusts faltered even more, his head falling back, you could feel that he was close. when he did release, his orgasm filling you up perfectly, shooting deep inside you, you were sure that was the best sensation you've ever felt.

“yeah, darling, letting me fill you up so good, hm? look at you, looking so wrecked. did i ruin you completely?”

you couldn't form coherent sentences, your mind occupied by a black cloud, where you wanted him, felt him, thought about him.

he laughed down at you, falling apart, wrapping an arm around your waist lazily. he nuzzled into your hair, feeling grounded on your scent, drunk in your taste. he lifted your chin up to kiss you once more, all those unspoken feelings, unacknowledged promises being transferred from you to him and vice-versa.

“i think you're receiving the first piece of cake this year, you were by far the one who made me happier today, princess.”

[ccsainzleclerc5516]

Taking care of his girls (part 1)

Pairing: Carlos Sainz x reader (y/n)

Warnings: none

a/n: another girl dad Carlos because I just can't get enough

Y/N's pov

The newborn stage is extremely challenging. Sleep deprivation caused by countless sleepless nights, lack of energy, baby crying even though she ate half an hour ago, trying to figure out the cause of her crying, colic, baby not latching, painful feedings or lack of milk production - all that and much more comes when you step into motherhood. Trust me, it is exhausting both physically and mentally and anyone who says otherwise is lying!

However, not much is talked about how demanding and tiring and difficult it is when you are burning with a fever and can barely stand on your feet, and you have a two-year-old daughter who also has a flu and who, in addition to all of that, is a very stubborn daddy's little girl and doesn't really like to listen to anyone except her dad. That two-year-old is our little girl Bea. Bea is a very stubborn and smart girl who is very attached to her dad and loves spending time with him. She is completely enchanted by him and whenever Carlos returns home from the race, she does not separate from him.

We've only recently started taking her to the races, but since she tends to run around the paddock and starts screaming when it's time for Carlos to get in the car, we've decided that we won't be able to follow Carlos everywhere he goes.

This time we could not attend the Grand Prix in Italy for another reason, and that reason was because I caught a flu, which almost knocked me off my feet, and two days later Bea was burning with a fever as well.

Being alone with her while I was sick, doing all the housework, cooking and taking care of her was very difficult and exhausting. I was very worried about her because she had a high temperature, she was very weak, she didn't want to eat much, she was crying all the time and she just wanted me to hold her in my arms and cuddle her.

Carlos returned from Italy to our home in Madrid yesterday and we both couldn't wait to see him. When he came back I could finally breathe a little, sit down and rest because he decided to take care of both of us.

It was the same today, even though I felt a little better, Bea was still coughing a lot and her nose was blocked, so I decided to go to the pharmacy to get a children's inhaler. Carlos decided to stay with her and fulfill all her wishes, and today the wish was cuddling and watching cartoons in the living room.

It took me quite a long time to get to the pharmacy, make the purchase and get back home, so I only returned after 45 minutes. The sight that greeted me when I entered the living room brought tears to my eyes, but happy tears full of gratitude.

Bea was lying curled up on Carlos' chest, his arms wrapped around her as his head fell back against the back of the couch his lips slightly parted as both of them were fast asleep while Dora the explorer begged for help in the background. Carlos tied her hair into a small ponytail on top of her head while her baby hairs were messily sticking out. For a moment I just stood next to the couch and watched them smiling and thinking how did I get so lucky?

"Babe" I approach Carlos from the back of the couch and whisper into his ear. "Babe, wake up." It took him a minute to realize they had fallen asleep and to wake up.

"Ay dios mío.." You could also hear the tiredness in his voice because he didn't sleep at all last night. He demanded that I rest and that he would look after Bea overnight.

"Let's take her to bed okay?" I say quietly trying not to wake her up.

"What time is it?" He asks.

"It's only 7 p.m. I'll take care of her tonight, you get some sleep okay?" I say caressing his cheek.

"No, no I'll do it You still haven't fully recovered amor and I want you to." He says leaving a kiss on my thumb. Just as Carlos slowly straightened up from a semi-lying position on the couch, Bea startled and started crying.

"Shh cariño, no llores." (shh darling don't cry) Carlos immediately began gently shushing her and rubbing her back as I sat next to them.

"Do you want to go sleep in mommy and daddy's bed baby?" I asked her placing a kiss on her hand. She doesn't usually sleep with us, but when she is sick we always let her.

"No" She rubbed her eyes nervously, still crying and burrying her head into the crook of Carlos neck. "Papa, mama" She whined extending her little hand towards me, but not wanting to leave Carlos' embrace.

"Está bien mi amor, mamá y papá están aquí, no te preocupes." Carlos said tightening his grip around her with one arm and with the other pulling me closer to them.

We quickly gave up on trying to talk her into going to bed because we realized it would only upset her even more so we both decided to curl up to Carlos.

"Mis princesas." I leaned my head against his shoulder wrapping my arm around our little bean as Carlos kissed both of our foreheads.

Part 2 here

[polarisjisung]

TRACK 505 — STILL INTO YOU

08 — FEELING DELIRIOUS

prev | masterlist | next

WARNINGS | swearing, sexual innuendos, kys/kms jokes mentions of alcohol

NOTES | not proof read 🧍‍♀️so if you see any typos no you didn't (yes you did pls tell me!!) also not fully certain this makes sense but I live in blissful ignorance 🙂‍↕️

-

Ignore it. That's all you wanted to do, to ignore it. You watched as your phone buzzed against the nightstand, once, twice, three times.

The fourth never came, but Mark's voice across the line did, and it came before you even had time to regret your decision.

Mark's voice was a lot of things, familiar, comforting, nostalgic, but above all, warm. Mark's voice was awfully warm, not the sharp professional voice he'd used in those meetings, not the light playful Mark you'd joke with before, but gentle, honest.

His words however, were anything but.

He was saying everything you’d spent the past two years trying not to think about.

Mark's voice came soft, but fast, half thoughts, half laughs, spilling over each other, like his words were loosened by something, his mind left to run free.

And for a moment, you forgot to breathe. His words settled in, the slow ache of nostalgia mixed with something that cracked through the walls you’d spent so long building.

You couldn't help but grip your phone tighter, as if you could hold onto it all, the moment, the memories.

You didn't need to see Mark to know he was drunk, the slurring of his speech, the distant but still chaotic hum of voices behind him, a sight you could picture too easily. The same noise, the same energy you used to live in. It was obvious.

Though Mark barely seemed aware of just how much you'd managed to piece together, too caught up in whatever half drunk train of thought had led him to calling you.

You had no choice but to listen, with his non-stop rambling, he was barely taking any time to breathe, classic Mark.

So you sunk deeper into the pillows behind you, listening as his voice spilled through the speaker, unfiltered, familiar and threading through the quiet of your bedroom like it belonged there. You didn't interrupt.

Though Mark realised your silence soon enough, cutting himself off mid sentence.

“You’re actually listening to me. That’s crazy.”

You let out a quiet laugh, your now glossy eyes stuck on the ceiling. “You’re not giving me much of a choice.”

“Thats fair.” You swear he sounds half asleep, but before you can question it, Mark begins again, the same reminiscent talk and raw emotion flooding through the silence once again.

“You know... I was thinking, it’s been a while since we had one of our late night talks. I miss that, you know?”

You chuckle, “Drunk Mark's awfully sentimental.”

“Let me finish y/n, because sober Mark would say the same thing.”

You have no reason not to believe him, so you offer a quiet hum in response and he continues.

“I miss it. Not just you—but us. Everything. I miss the sound of you laughing over something stupid, the way we'd all crowd around the dinner table, arguing about the dumbest stuff like it was life or death.”

You let his words sink in, feeling the weight of them pull at something buried deep in your chest. Something you'd like to keep buried.

“I guess it’s–” He hesitates, then comes the sound of him shifting on the other end, you suppose running a hand through his hair in classic Mark fashion. “I guess it’s a little stupid of me to be saying this now, huh?”

You let out a soft sigh. "Yeah, a bit." But your voice is softer than either of you had expected, betraying almost.

“I just–” He cuts himself off, then tries again, his voice much quieter. “I just thought you’d come back, you know? Not even for the band, but for us, for all the stupid stuff we used to do together. I thought we could find a way back to that.”

You don't respond.

Mark exhales. “It doesn’t feel the same without you.” He pauses, waiting for you to respond perhaps, but when you don't, “We aren't the same without you y/n, we need you.”

You don't respond again. Mark takes it as cue to continue, rambling for at least another 5 minutes.

You really wish he didn't.

“I should probably shut up, but I miss you. We all do.”

The silence stretches a little longer than you'd like to admit. And then, you speak. “Mark?”

He breathes out a response. “Yeah?”

“You don't get to say that. Not now.”

He sighs, “I know.” then, when you don't respond, again, he speaks, “But you didn’t say I was wrong.”

“Go to sleep Mark.”

You end the call, but the conversation doesn’t end with it. It lingers, replaying in your head, each word settling into the quiet of your room.

You shut your eyes, willing yourself to push it down, to bury it deep where it can’t reach you. And this time, you mean it. No more looking back, no more lingering in the past. This is it. You’re done. It's the right choice, the obvious one.

And you think that maybe in the morning, it’ll feel final, that you’ll wake up and the weight of this will all be gone.

Still, you tell yourself you’ll sleep on it. Except—you can’t. You can't sleep on it, can’t sleep over it, under it. You can’t sleep at all.

tags: @sinisxtea @nanawrlds @f6llsun @karlitava @dudekiss3r @kaosuni @ayukas @soo-sh1 @flaminghotyourmom @jenobubbles @sibwol @n0hyuck @blossominghunnie @i03jae @rikufan3000 @chenlezip @awktwurtle @cookiehaos @thatsatricky1 @nctdreamchaser @jae-n0 @blondiedae @17ericas @lotties-readings @yizhrt @gomdoleemyson @jwisteroid7 @nctrawberries @t-102 @dilflover44 @saranghoeforanton @lvsdoyo @holyhaech @minkieater @iluvkyo @desssss-0 @jenocity23 (comment/send an ask to be added !)

[stargirlrchive]

— BSF BIKER!SIMON

cw: simon riley x female reader, biker!simon, v slight smut at the very end but not fully, simon is possessive and jealous (meow) ((i will eat him)), also the way reader yearns for him is so real, likes she’s me — inspo post

NSFW ✩ MINORS DNI (18+ ONLY)

GENERAL MASTERLIST

You heard Simon before you saw him, well you heard his bike. The loud revving of the engine, growing louder and more frequent the longer it took for you to come out of the restaurant. Your heels clacked loudly behind you, your steps quickening as you sent your date another apologetic smile. 

Fifteen minutes prior, Simon had texted you, telling you he needed you. You had been unable to text back, not wanting to seem rude, but your date sent you an understanding smile as you picked up your phone after the constant buzzing.

Your eyes quickly skimming the messages and anxiety embedded into your stomach the more frantic Simon’s messages got.

You’re out right now?

Who are you with?

I need to see you.

I’m going to get you. 

I’m on my way.

You felt your heart lurch in your throat as you checked his location. He was only about four minutes out and your fingers prickled with nerves.

The soft voice of the man across the table from you brought you out of your spiral. “Everything alright?”

You forced a smile onto your face, nodding, “A friend of mine-”

The loud roar of the motorcycle had you tensing, standing up quickly as you looked towards the entrance of the nice restaurant, “I-I’ll be right back, I’m sorry-”

You didn’t give him a chance to respond, bolting towards the door.

You nearly tripped over your heels as you tried to get to Simon faster, the words leaving you in an exasperated breath, “What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”

You couldn't get the words out fast enough, your brows pinching as you looked over him, looking for anything that looked wrong but everything seemed fine.

Your brows furrowing together further as he barked out a laugh, even with his visor on you could feel the way his eyes were skimming over your body. “Why d’nt you ever wear anything like this when we go out?”

“Simon-”

“Get on.”

“What?”

His thick fingers reached out to gently cup your elbow, pulling you closer to him as his fingers softly rubbed across your exposed skin, distracting you. “Come on, let’s go.”

“I’m on a date.”

His fingers stilled on your arm, and even though you couldn’t see his face, you knew he was frowning. You felt the nerves wrapping around your throat at his silence. That silly part of you that longed for him wanted to soothe him, and you inched closer. 

His fingers dropped from your elbow and you instantly missed the warmth, your fingers moved and popped his visor open. 

His eyes were darker than normal, upset, and warmth licked at your belly. You hated that he could do this to you, that he could warrant such reactions from you with just one look.

“Get on.” This time, his tone was anything but playful. Just a thick growl as he handed you the helmet that was reserved just for you.

“I can’t!”

“I will go in there myself and tell him you’re gonna be busy for the rest of the night.”

You suppressed the whimper that wanted to fall from your mouth, arousal pooling between your thighs as you tried so desperately not to cave.

But his eyes softened, his gloved fingers inching closer and tangling with yours as he pulled you into him, “C’mon, love. I got a view I’ve been wanting to show you.”

You barely registered that you had agreed, only when he was helping you into your helmet and then your thighs were spread wide to cage around his legs. Your palms flat against his abdomen as you held on close.

And you should’ve felt guilty when he revved his bike again, as if showing off, but you didn’t. You couldn’t. Not when his gloved fingers gently squeezed your knee and he was off before you could think too much about what you were doing to that poor man that was waiting for you at the restaurant.

The two of you drove for what felt like hours, the cold nip of the wind on your skin felt surprisingly mild with your body pressed flush against his.

He smelled so good, like cedar and musk, and cigarettes. So incredibly Simon, and you inched even closer to him. Your fingers gently rubbed against his stomach as he drove faster and faster.

When you finally arrived at the view, Simon helped you off the bike, laughing quietly as you huffed about how your heels were gonna get ruined. Both of your helmets came off and you tried to fix your hair as best you could.

A soft noise of surprise left your mouth as he scooped you up, sitting you back firmly against the seat of his bike.

“No ruined heels on my account.”

The air around the two of you felt different, as if the two of you were just silently orbiting around the other until one decided to veer off course and crash.

His fingers didn’t move from your hips as he towered over you, “What are you doing, Simon?”

Rough fingers gently dipped into your waistband, softly gliding against the lacy material against your hip. “Jus’ wanna be close to you.”

Your breath hitched staring up at him, his lashes kissing his cheeks as he stared down at your lips. Your heart thrummed wildly in your chest, your body feeling alight with desire and warmth. 

The two of you had always toed on something that was more than friendship, but it had never felt like this. It had never been so glaringly obvious. His head dipped down and his lips ghosted over your own. Barely touching. Waiting.

When you didn’t back away, his lips were on yours the next instant. They were plump and softer than you could've ever imagined. His fingers digging into your hips as his mouth pressed firmly to yours. His tongue prying your lips open and familiarizing the feel with his tongue.

Your hands were everywhere, you didn't know where to touch him. They were first fisting at his shirt, then gripping the taut muscles on his arms, then tugging at his hair. He brought your hips towards the edge of his bike and pressed himself flush against you. Slowly grinding as his mouth moved down to your neck, nipping and kissing. Licking down the column of your throat as he pulled out desperate noises from your swollen lips.

His finger made its way into the waistband of your skirt, bunching up the material at your hips. His eyes focused on the pretty black lace that covered you from him, a deep growl ripping from his throat as his thumb pushed against your clit, “Hate that you wore this for him.”

Your hips bucked, and the shake of the bike under you reminded you of where you were. A soft laugh that mingled with a moan escaped you, “It’s not like you were asking to see them.”

He gave a soft pinch to your clit and you gasped, glaring up at him softly, “Thought it was pretty obvious.”

You whined as he slipped his fingers away from your cunt, his lips pressing against yours again as he mumbled, “As much as I want to take my time with you, anyone can show up.”

You felt dizzy as he turned you over, bending you over the seat of his bike. Your back arched as much as it could, feeling his hardened cock press against the swell of your ass.

“Next time.”

He pulled away and you could hear the sound of his zipper being drawn, his thick fingers pushing your panties to the side to run his cock against your messy folds.

He gave three taps to your clit before dragging the tip through your folds.

Your breath hitched as he gently pushed forward. His thick cock spearing into you. The excitement evident in his voice, “Yeah, next time.”

[beaulesbian]

🌘☀️ Some thoughts on Zoro & Luffy and their connection to gods and demons☀️🌒

This post started at first with just a few points about Zoro in the context to Asura/ King of Hell but since then it somehow evolved into connecting bits and pieces between Zoro & Luffy parallels again, I just can't help it, sooo...long post ahead.

Wano + Egghead spoilers

I always love remembering this one of the very first scenes where we (and Luffy) first hear about Zoro, and in the context of Zoro being a Pirate Hunter, even described as a demonic beast or as Koby says "demon in human form." None of this discouraged Luffy upon hearing this, on the contrary - he thought that if he sees for himself if Zoro was a good guy, he would be a great addition to his crew, and then went out of his way to seek him out! And only later we got the explanation that Zoro just couldn't find his way back home. "Roaming the seas" meant surviving for him, bounty hunter meant getting by in life with the skills he knew the best - swords, which is kind of sad when you think about it, but all the more interesting that it was Luffy who found him in Shells town,

where Zoro, a nonbeliever of any gods of higher power, was bound to a cross, and the first thing Luffy pointed out was "he's smiling".

I like to think that the smile might have been one of the first signs important enough for Luffy to choose someone for his crew - not only the kindness that followed when Luffy saw Zoro eating the dirty rice ball, but the smile that's by itself also very connected to Luffy himself:

After that first fight they won together, already reading each other so well, Zoro was the first one to call Luffy his captain (and later at Baratie also the first one to call him the future Pirate King!). He was someone who already fully believed in Luffy's future of reaching his dream without questioning it, perphaps because their drive towards their goals and dreams was very similar. And Luffy was the one who freed Zoro and let him have his swords - his biggest treasures - and gave him back the possibility to go into the world to actually follow his dream!

"One day, he'll show up and take you out under the sun, to the freedom of the sea!" - ch. 1095, Buccaneers about Sun God Nika (flashback with Kuma)

Fast forward to Wano - it's incredible how entangled their stories are with belief in always striving to do better/be stronger/try again next time for Luffy, someone who doesn't care what others think - he just needs to do what he wants and to be free - only for him to awaken his Devil Fruit and his God Nika powers; and for Zoro (a non-believer/apatheist) with how determined he was to successfully wield Enma so he could defeat King the Wildfire even to the lengths of becoming the King of Hell if that was what needed to be done to get Luffy one more step towards being the Pirate King.

Which brings me back to Demon Asura Zoro and where we saw this form throughout the manga:

This whole post started at first as a parallel to my other post about Zoro not really being shown to react to Luffy's Gear 5 (yet, as of chapter 1109), and I kept thinking about Zoro's Asura technique and how he used it so far only three (!!!) times, and there weren't many reactions from the strawhat crew either.

First one was during the Enies Lobby against Kaku, who even calls that vision 'demon-god' (ch. 417). If I remember Zoro was there by himself with Kaku, his crew each fighting other opponents elswhere:

The second time was during their first visit to Sabaody Archipelago, ch. 510, where it was the whole crew against the Pacifistas. The only bigger reactions were Brook and Chopper ("So many Zoros!!" - how cute!)

Luffy went right after Zoro with his last attack against the Pacifistas, so he's either seen Zoro's attack or it just wasn't the time or place to react, which, fair.

and then, third and last time so far Zoro went into his Asura form, it was up against Kaido, ch. 1010, when Luffy was out of it and Kaido was threatening how he would end Luffy in various ways.. which only angered Zoro more ("That's my captain!" - yeah, tell him, Zoro!)

All of these three times we've seen Asura, it was against few of the most dangerous opponents and all three times Zoro had his bandana on, being serious about it. All three of these times he knew his whole crew was fighting for their lives too and were in very real danger. Enies Lobby really changed the tone of the next few arcs with how serious things were about to go; Sabaody was just after Thriller Bark with Zoro being still injured and he knew what Kuma/Pacifistas were capable of - there was real fear and despair. And of course, on Wano against Kaido,. he saw how much damage Luffy took, Zoro could only hope to put more wounds on Kaido to count in their favor.

Zoro knew he had one last attack to try and make some difference in this fight - and this was before his fight with King, so he wasn't fully in sync with Enma yet, but it was good enough to unlock Asura technique - with something more to it.

Apparently along with his haki - not just the armament or observation haki, but the supreme king haki, as Kaido himself is shocked to find out. Zoro wasn't even consciously aware of having/using this haki.

Even the wiki mentions this as Zoro adding the supreme king haki to his Asura attack to strenghten it, or possibly was only able to unlock this technique because of having supreme king haki - meaning he was possibly using it even in both of those pre-time skip situations mentioned above.

The supreme king haki is something people can't learn, but are born with, meaning Zoro probably didn't know until Wano (and still wasn't sure what he did), but possibly learnt to use it instinctively - very much like Luffy on Amazon Lily.)

I already made a post that touched a bit on King of hell Zoro, and other parts around Asura (clearly, i'm never done thinking about that), with a very big possibility/hints that he could come from lineage of people of the D. (asura - enemies of gods - people of D.) - especially if it's connected to supreme king haki as inherited ability (although that isn't confirmed in the manga, as far as I understood).

This brings me to Zoro's family, and specifically Ryuma.

Wano was a great arc that connected things from Thriller Bark -with Zoro returning the legendary sword Shusui back to Ryuma's grave where it belonged.

There was an interesting panel at the end of Wano, where people were celebrating Luffy's victory over Kaido, but were given the name Joyboy as their savior - possibly Momonosuke's doing as Luffy told him not to mention him by name because Luffy didn't want to be a hero.

And in this panel, the peple are comparing this feat of victory to the legendary "God of the Blade" - which is another title for Ryuma.

It's so curious how Zoro is connected to Ryuma, even through span of many centuries and countries across, but still there is that connection, on top of actually fighting Ryuma's zombie on Thriller Bark, and Zoro isn't even aware of it. We only know about it from the SBS corner of Oda mentioning Zoro's family. (SBS corner in vol. 105. Ryuma wasn't mentioned there precisely, but the name Shimotsuki being of Zoro's grandmother and others from Wano, it makes sense they're Ryuma's descendants):

Side note: There's also something really beautiful of how the Shimotsuki line was passed down on Zoro from his grandmother - and his promise he cherishes since childhood being tied to Kuina, someone who wanted to be the greatest swords(wo)man - and therefore Zoro carrying Wado and that dream and promise for her.

Zoro & Luffy

Now to tie it all back to parallels with Zoro and Luffy - I love that there are always these small moment in how similar these two are - in their honest words and actions, in them believing in one another and believing even more in reaching their dreams, their crew and their strengths. In both being so directionally clueless and sometimes outright stupid, yet in certain situations (more so in battles and fights), they are the ones sometimes smartest and most strategic.

Then there's these other similarities between them: how much they don't care about what's told about them or -be it by luck or fate- how things work out in their favor in the end, usually. How both of them don't wish to be heroes, because heroes had to share (food and sake).

How there's that fact that Zoro doesn't know the full context of his powers, especially with his supreme king haki- or that he doesn't want to know the truth or put a name to that ability, because he fights with his swords and doesn't need to put belief of any other powers beside his own strength. (Or maybe he will soon learn how to use it to his (and his crew's) benefit.)

and Luffy, who doesn't know probably anything about Nika- and most likely wouldn't care much about them beside the scope of his new powers. The whole meaning of being something like "sun god" for others didn't register with him yet, and it might never be that important to him personally. Time after time, people around him mention luck or fate, or how people of the D. are the enemies of the Gods - enemies of the celestial dragons, but those don't really matter to Luffy because it doesn't change why he fights and why he needs himself and others to be free and achieve his dream.

How Zoro and Ryuma could be parallels to Luffy and Joyboy - one living in the present, reminiscent of those that lived centuries ago - something about the history always repeating.

When Zoro got to fight Ryuma on Thriller Bark, or even Hyogoro compares him to Shimotsuki Ushimaru (Zoro's great uncle),

and how Zunesha was waiting for Joyboy, how Roger and Oden found messages from Joyboy of his promises to return.

The parallels between sun god Nika and demon god/king Asura are so interesting in their opposites yet similarities. There's still so much we don't know about Nika or Joyboy, but Luffy himself isn't just the perfect picture of responsibility or justice. He's free, and that's the most important for him. He now has the power to do what he really wants to do with his powers, he unlocked that new potential to make it even more fun and even more dangerous against his enemies.

Even if Zoro's saying he doesn't believe in higher powers he embraces the powers that unlocked with Enma and getting him the title of King of Hell, he knows it would be the things that would keep him fighting for another minute, hour, day when it becomes necessary to protect Luffy and their crew.

Zoro may not believe in any gods but he believes in Luffy with all his being.

And in the similar vein, Luffy is the one who always believed in Zoro's strength and capability to protect the rest of their crew when it was necessary, times after time.

It's feels like it's not at all a coincidence that Luffy's whole crew is full of otherness and beings connected to hell/monsters/demons more than anything divine - because lot of the gods in One Piece are mentioned in context of standing above others and above common people - it's a bit flipped of what's good or not, or even more it's never clear because that's life, and those people are just claiming some titles. Eneru being the first example of a "god" the Straw Hats encountered, celestial dragons being called Gods, the Gorosei having each titles of "Godhead" - it's no wonder that Luffy's crew all fights for freedom and reaching whatever each of them needs to achive as their dream,

and includes: a dead man but living skeleton Brook; a demon child Nico Robin; Chopper "I don't mind being a monster for Luffy.'"; Sanji with all his hell fire and "diable" kicks and attacks, along with his non human strength and other abilities; Nami wielding the powers similar to Eneru without the need of both Devil Fruit or being called a goddess, and bringing down lightning on anyone who threatens her crew; Usopp and his powers of nature and plants sprouting new life and strengths from long distance; Jimbei - fishman and former Sun Pirate and also "First son of the Sea"; Franky the more cyborg than a man; and of course, Roronoa "I might as well become the King of Hell" Zoro.

It's not all so black and white, good or bad. Luffy is still everything that makes him Luffy - he's honest and selfish in his selflesness, kind and brave and stubborn, and always knows that Zoro (and his whole crew) has his back so he doesn't have to hold back.

And Zoro is still Zoro despite being able to wield some newer haki powers he's slowly discovering now. He's still getting lost and still is his stubborn self that puts the crew and Luffy above himself, and would follow Luffy into hell if that was needed.

Luffy and Zoro are "just" captain and his first mate, always throughout the story since the beginning. Orphans with such interestingly woven past and relationships around them, who grew up with a big dream they had to go and achieve it no matter what, and found someone just as honest, kind, powerful and trustworthy as they were. But there's that deep and fierce devotion that always borderlines on something beyond just good. They're pirates - because that means being free.

They can be chaotic and powerful, and find something divine in the loyalty of the demonic powers, and something hellish in the god-like entity bringing freedom.

It feels like something Roger said to Rayleigh when they first met - That it was a fated meeting.

[shadowofthesun123]

Analysis of Tyler's behind-the-scenes storyline in first season. Part 1

Over the past three years, I’ve spent a lot of time wondering what exactly happened to Tyler behind the scenes of Season 1: how he fell into Laurel’s trap, how she awakened him, and how much he actually knew about the plan.

Now, after years of analyzing the show under a microscope, I finally have a fairly coherent picture. I considered writing a fic based on it, but with Season 2 approaching fast, and I'm not gonna make it before the release, so I decided to share it here and later see what I guessed right.

Who is Laurel working for?

Laurel Gates clearly has powerful backers - she managed to change her identity twice and acquire documents good enough to get her hired at Nevermore.

We know that Laurel arrived at Nevermore about a year and a half before Wednesday. At that time, she couldn't have known Wednesday would be coming and that she could use her to open Crackstone’s tomb.

So I believe Laurel had another mission. Most likely: to enslave a Hyde and deliver him to her employers.

Who are they? I think the real villains are somehow tied to Willow Hill. Why?

1. The name Thornhill echoes Willow Hill (thorn and rowan hills).

2. Laurel had a file on Tyler’s mother from Willow Hill. It was a secret file - not the one his father had. Donovan’s file mentioned bipolar disorder, which means Laurel had access to a different source.

3. Laurel couldn’t have learned about Françoise and her son from her father - he died long before Françoise’s Hyde ever emerged, and back then she hadn’t even married and had a different last name. The only ones who definitely knew about Françoise being a Hyde were people from Willow Hill.

So I believe Laurel came to Jericho with a mission to awaken a Hyde and deliver him to the villains connected to Willow Hill - possibly to study and use him as a weapon for their own purposes.Laurel awakened Tyler, but didn’t use him for killings right away. The murders began shortly before Wednesday’s arrival. I believe that’s when Laurel decided to stray from her original mission and pursue her personal revenge - resurrecting Crackstone.

How did Laurel awaken Tyler’s Hyde?

I seriously doubt Laurel told Tyler from the start that she intended to enslave him and use him for mass murder.

I think she told him the truth about his mother - and warned that he could share her fate unless he accepted her help. She promised not to awaken but rather suppress or cure the Hyde. Later, in the cave, Tyler realized she had lied to him.

How much did Tyler know about Laurel’s plan?

At first - almost nothing.Early in the show, it seems like he doesn’t remember the killings. He likely killed in full Hyde form, and Laurel harvested the organs herself. This is supported by the fact that right after the tourist’s murder (which happened when Wednesday arrived), Laurel is seen with muddy boots.

There’s also a sense that after Rowan’s death, Tyler is trying to figure things out himself. He follows his father into the woods and seems surprised the monster didn’t harm Wednesday.Even in his police station monologue, he says he didn’t understand what was happening at first.

When did Tyler realize he was the one killing in the woods and when did he regain his memories?

I think Tyler realized he was the killer after Rowan’s death. This was most likely his first murder not by Laurel's will. Hyde protected Wednesday, who Tyler liked. He acted not by Laurel's orders to protect Wednesday, because Tyler was actually going to take Wednesday away, which goes against the plan.

But I believe he fully remembered everything after the murder at the Meeting House. That’s when we get the bathtub scene.

That scene likely takes place at the Gates mansion. Tyler is screaming underwater, probably because he isn’t allowed to make noise or turn on the lights. But maybe he broke that rule intentionally - using the lights as a distress signal, which prompted Mayor Walker to launch an investigation.

Why does Laurel’s plan make no sense from Tyler’s perspective?

I don't think Laurel's revenge plan is something Tyler would fully support.

Firstly, there’s no way he would willingly agree to being turned into a slave and a murderer. That’s absurd.

Secondly, because the theory that Tyler seeks revenge on Nevermore for his mother makes very little sense.

Françoise graduated from Nevermore before the Hydes were exiled (according to the Outcast Book, she was 19 at the time of the exile in 1993). Her Hyde awakened much later - after Tyler was born.

Also, if resurrecting the dead is truly possible, wouldn’t Tyler want to bring back his mother instead of some insane old Pilgrim?

There’s a chance that Tyler’s mother is still alive, and that Laurel knows it (by the way, we’ve never seen Tyler visiting her grave, which would make sense if she were dead). But if she’s alive, then why would Tyler participate in a plan for genocide?

He’d be more likely to try to find her and save her. In that case, maybe Laurel and Tyler made a deal - she would tell him where his mother was if he helped her carry out the plan.

Still, I find the conversation between Laurel and Tyler (while she was disguised as Weems) very strange.

Laurel says: “I showed you who you really are” (as if that’s a good thing?) and then “Outcasts made you a monster”.

What? Why the outcasts, when it was clearly Laurel?

And if being a monster is a bad thing, why is it good that she “showed him who he is”?

To me, those two phrases contradict each other and make little sense. If anyone has a clearer interpretation, feel free to comment.

To be continued... This is about half of what I've written, so I'll post the second part tomorrow.

[ethereal-moonglow]

┊┊┊✧ ⁺ •

┊┊❁ུ۪۪⸙ ͎.

┊┊.

┊ ➶ ｡˚ 　　°

*. * ·

Legends untold by time, can you hear them now?

Matchup exchange with @imjustabeanie

Your match is Capitano/Thrain!

"Thrain" Your voice called out to the general. He turned his attention to you, his smile bright. "Yes? Do you need anything?" He asked as he moved closer. His coat trailed behind him as he moved closer. He only stopped once he was an arm's length away.

He felt his heart skip a beat when you smiled at him like that. You merely shook your head and offered him a flower crown. There goes his heart again. He laughed softly and bowed down, allowing you to put it on him. He then slowly looked up, looking straight at you. "We wish you luck in your battles. We await for your victorious return."

He adjusted the crown on his head before standing up straight. He took off his coat and placed it on her shoulder. "I shall return with everyone. So wait for us."

Love isn't just a fleeting moment. It wasn't something that can be lost to time. It won't fade as easily as one might think. Love had always been much more than that. It's beautiful and yet it can also kill the heart in an instant. Love was something Thrain always carried. The love of his people lies in his heart. Their souls cradled lovingly by his deteriorating body. It didn't matter to him how much it hurt. He just wanted his people to be close to him, to their home. Love had always been about his kingdom.

He thought he knew what love was until he met you again.

He thought he had lost you to time. He accepted the fact that he was the only living reminder of the fallen kingdom. But here you were, in Natlan, enjoying. He couldn't believe it. He always had hoped you survive like he did. He secretly wished for Celestia to spare you so he can hold you again.

When Khaenri'ah was still standing, he always remembered your smile. The way you always carried yourself with confidence. Everything drew him to you in some way. Your sarcastic personality drew him closer. He didn't admit it out loud. But he loves you.

He couldn't stop himself, he took off his helmet and went to you. He didn't care taht people can see his face. He didn't care if he was practically dying. All that mattered is that he gets to hold you, even if it is for the last time. "It's me," A whispered plea, for you to notice him, for you to remember. The desperation in his voice was clear as he held back everything to crush you in a hug.

His heartbeat was so fast he can hear it echo. He heald his breath as you turned to look at him. "Thrain?"

And that's all it took for him. He wrapped you in his arms, his coat enveloping you. "I love you" He whispered as he placed his head on yours. "I had loved you since before. And I love you still," He said as he tightened his embrace on you.

-; ｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈•ﾟ｡

Capitano loves you with all his heart. No matter how isolated you are, he'll always be there as your pillar of support. He doesn't care that you don't share everything to him. As long as he is able to help you, as long as he is able to comfort you? Its enough for him. Everything about you is captivating to him. Especially when you get annoyed at someone and get sarcastic? Oh he loves watching you be petty and standing up for yourself.

He is chill yet protective of you. He trust you fully and doesn't worry. He is pretty self-assured and he also knows that you have his heart. He knows you'll take care of it.

✎ "Darling, you have my heart. Do with it as you will. Do your worse but I'll always be here for my lover"

[kinascum]

INVISIBLE SMOKE - CHRIS STURNIOLO

athr's note: idk if i hate or love this BUT M BACK!!!

warnings: ANGST NO COMFORT. Mean!Chris (selfish, no emoional responsability, yells at the reader and insults them). Yelling, Swearing, Fighting, Being uncomfortable, idk if i missed anything.

summary Y/N struggles to adjust to the new dynamic in her relationship with chris as his fame startes to rise, and their time together becomes slimmer. what happens when Y/N stands up for herself?

------------------------------------------!!!

It had been a few months since that fateful night at the noisy party, the night when fate had brought us together. I had been wearing my favorite pair of heels which, as luck would have it, had broken just as I was walking towards the bar. It was then that I spotted Chris, looking at me with an amused smile playing on his lips, and I mustered up the courage to ask him for help.

To my surprise, he not only fixed my heel but also struck up a conversation with me. His blue eyes stood out against his pale skin, which was shining in different colors from the lights around us. We had exchanged numbers amidst the chaos of the party, and that was the beginning of our story.

Fast forward to the present, and I found myself sitting at the dining table, surrounded by my new family. Chris was sitting to my right, but it felt like he was miles away from me. Matt was on my left, and Nick was in front of me, while MaryLou and Jimmy occupied the two ends of the table. I couldn't help but feel like something was off.

Chris seemed distant, and I couldn't shake off the feeling that he didn't have any time for me anymore. I had been struggling to adjust to this new dynamic in our relationship as his fame started to rise and our time together became slimmer, and it was taking a toll on me. As the night went on, I found myself lost in thought, unable to fully enjoy the company of my loved ones.

His words reverberated in my head, and I felt my heart sink as I realized the severity of the situation. We had just arrived back at my apartment, and he was pacing around the kitchen while I sat on the sofa, my hands covering my head as tears streamed down my face. He watched me cry, his face devoid of any emotion as he spoke in a cold, harsh tone.

"Can't you just be normal?" he asked, frustration evident in his voice. "I'm asking you for one basic thing, and it's not that hard." He walked up to me, towering over me as his hands swung around in anger. "I didn't mean to, okay?" I tried to explain, my voice shaking with fear. "I just wasn't feeling good, and I didn't know how to express it." His face contorted with rage, and he let out a bitter laugh. "Oh, Y/N… you're so selfish, you know that?" he said, his voice laced with sarcasm. "You never think about anyone else but yourself." As he looked down at his feet, I felt a wave of despair wash over me.

The person I loved most in the world was standing in front of me, but he seemed like a stranger. The hurt and anger in his eyes were too much for me to bear, and I knew that something had changed between us forever.

I stood up, feeling my anger taking over me while tears started to pour out of my eyes. "Well maybe if you would've asked me what was wrong none of this could've happened," I muttered, my voice trembling with emotion. Four long months of taking his constant criticism without uttering a single complaint had finally taken their toll on me. "And I'm selfish?!" I exclaimed, my voice rising with each word. "You're unbelievable, Chris," I said, my voice choking on my tears. I knew that lashing out at him would only result in more pain, but I couldn't back down now.

I stood there, waiting for Chris to respond. But instead of apologizing, he just stared at me, his eyes flashing with anger. "What do you want from me?" he said, his voice cold. "I can't be everything to you. You're always so needy, always wanting more. It's never enough, is it?"

I felt a surge of anger and frustration rise within me. "That's not true," I said, my voice trembling. "All I want is for you to listen to me, to care about me. Is that too much to ask?"

Chris sneered at me. "You're impossible," he said. "I can't deal with you anymore. I'm done."

And with that, he turned and walked away, leaving me standing there, alone and broken. I watched him go, feeling a sense of despair wash over me. I knew that we would never be able to make it work, that our relationship was doomed to fail.

But even as I thought that a small part of me still held onto hope, still believed that maybe, just maybe, we could find a way to make things right. But deep down, I knew that it was just wishful thinking, that the reality was far bleaker than I wanted to admit.

[mintedwitcher]

Im the new person from earlier and while I would love a calm fandom I've been around for a while and know that that's a pipe dream, (loved the reylo death threats phase hopefully this ship war never progresses that far) and honestly it can be fun reading the discourse. Luckily I also know how to filter tags and block people. But yeah. I have dreams for what I'd want to happen in s9 but I will not be getting my hopes up. Really just want a nice fulfilled story line for the characters but I would not put my money on it actually happening. As long as they dont pull another Kim level character assassination, I truly cannot see a real way that situation is ever fully resolved even if we have multiple family therapy episodes with chris and eddie, I'll probably be happy enough and if not there'll still be fanfiction.

My most secret of secrets i love the concept of Eddie's character but in the show I cannot stand him at times even if I stan a messy queen. I will never understand the thought process of the whole Kim of it all. Him and Marisol were on the fast track to breaking up anyways if he couldn't figure out his whole issue of her having been training to be a nun and if chris' actor was needing a break he would have just visited his grandparents they didn't need to come and take him??!! Chris, abuela, and pepa are the only diaz I need on the show, the rest take it or leave it.

I have to say, from a writer's perspective, I enjoyed the Kim drama. It was a new relationship issue that we haven't seen Eddie deal with before, and the consequences were actually really interesting. The problem, in my opinion, is the lack of commitment to those consequences.

Chris left, Eddie did nothing. Chris stayed away, Eddie did nothing. Then suddenly he decides he needs to be there - not because he actually feels remorseful for what he did or that he understands where he fucked up, but because his parents were essentially "taking over" Chris's milestones. He felt left out, so he forced himself into that space, without actually taking any accountability for what he did to create that situation in the first place. He never talks to Chris about what happened, Chris is not shown to hold any lingering emotion about the situation once Eddie arrives, and things get miraculously "fixed" by Eddie declaring that Chris has to live with him again, "whether you like it or not".

That, to me, is where the narrative falls apart. Because this whole situation could have been a really good, important progression for Eddie's character. He could have taken accountability, realised that he has trouble with commitment and relationships and intimacy, he could have gone to therapy to discuss his still-present grief over Shannon. He could have gone to Texas much sooner and talked to his son about what actually happened, instead of trying to brush it aside and lovebomb Chris the way he did. This could have been a really pivotal time for Eddie as a character, but it was wasted, because the show couldn't commit to the consequences they'd already put in place.

As for the Diaz parents, the fact of the matter is that Chris does not have a close relationship with them, and hasn't for years. That's deliberate, to show us - and Eddie - just how badly Eddie has fucked up, that Chris would rather be in Texas with his grandparents that he's not all that close with, instead of staying in LA with his father.

I don't think the Kim arc is "character assassination" (because really, it isn't). I think it had a good start, but they fumbled the aftermath, and that weakens the entire arc. I also don't believe at all that this entire arc was conceptualised just as a way to give Gavin time off by writing Chris out for a while. That is far too much effort when they could just have Eddie say that Chris is staying with Pepa, for example, or having the scenes written around Chris's absence, like they did in season 5 (iirc) when Eddie and Chris went to El Paso for Ramon's retirement party.

[zoniteillusion-pyritedreams]

heiii can you do a reading on how mingyu behaves around his crush? or when he likes someone? thank you 💕💕🖤🎀

“How Mingyu Pursues His Crush (Big Softboy Delulu Energy)”

Okay besties, Aphrodite came through again with glossy lips and a knowing smirk to spill how Mingyu acts when he’s crushing hard. Grab your iced latte and oversized cardigan because this is a tale of conflicted chaos, softboy thirst, and romantic drama. Let’s go.

He’s giving: Tall, awkward, emotionally constipated romantic.

At first? He hesitates. Heavy Justice reversed / 2 of Swords energy. He overthinks everything. Like, “Did I smile too hard? Was that eye contact too long? Should I just disappear??” He's all up in his head worrying if he's being too much or not enough. Cue existential crisis in the group chat.

But once he decides? BABY IT’S GO TIME.

Suddenly it’s fast texts, impulsive flirty comments, showing up where you are “by accident” (eight of wands vibes). He gets bold, chaotic, possibly clumsy, and your friends are like, “Is he flirting or having a medical emergency?”

Spoiler: it’s both.

Emotionally? It’s complicated.

He wants a movie romance like dramatic stargazing and forehead kisses after deep convos about the universe. But… he’s lowkey terrified of rejection and still healing from something messy. That Hermit + Tower reversed combo says he hides behind the “just friends” label while plotting an emotionally grand confession in his mind.

He won’t say “I like you” right away. He’ll say:

“Do you want me to walk you home?”

“You look really good in that.”

“I saved you a seat.”

And if you flirt back even a little? He’ll lose sleep replaying it.

How he actually acts when you’re around?

Accidentally bumps into you and apologizes 4x.

Stares when you’re not looking but looks away when you are.

Talks to your friends hoping it gets back to you.

Helps you carry stuff even if it's like... one pencil.

Posts a "Deep" IG story with emotional song lyrics no one asked for.

But once he knows you're into him too?

He turns into a poetic golden retriever.

Big gestures.

Loyal.

Protective.

Wants to do things for you.

(Also: night of cups = man is a lover not a fighter, unless someone hurts your feelings then he’s BOTH.)

And his inner conflict?

He wants love (two of cups) but doesn’t want to be too vulnerable. He’s afraid of choosing wrong, of getting hurt again, of being too intense.

So he overthinks, overgives, and tries to “earn” your love—even when he already has your attention.

So what’s the aesthetic?

Imagine a boy who buys you snacks because “you looked tired today.”

Texts you memes and panics when you don’t respond in 3 mins.

Wants to kiss you but ends up hugging you for too long instead.

And writes your name in his notes app just to see how it looks.

That’s Mingyu.

#CrushingMingyu = soft chaos, emotional depth, awkward flirting, and heart-eyes overload.

He doesn’t just fall he Spirals Romantically.

And once he knows it’s real? He’ll ride or die for you, no questions asked.

Ok... So Mingyu is an accidental prone over thinker with that puppy dog energy and vibes. He wants that fairy tale movie k-drama type of Love Story but he's also slightly emotionally constipated. Fully afraid of making the wrong move or picking and choosing the wrong person etc. Now as a fellow 97 liner I think those kind of makes sense. I get this whenever I do a ideal type or how insert idle acts with their Crush specifically for people also born in 97 because I think all of us kind of grew up with the whole rom-com, disney, Hallmark original movies, you couldn't flip a channel without some kind of romantic show playing as children. And even as like teenagers and stuff like one of the earliest k-dramas I remember watching was sitting with my stepdad and we were just watching TV and coffee prince was playing like coffee prince was the most vivid memory I have of the first k-drama I genuinely sat down and like actively watched and I had a Google search it but that came out in 2007 so I was 10 years old I was 10 and that was like the first show outside of like kid shows that I watched and ended up really enjoying and it just set the president for all the shows end up watching afterwards. It was always some form of a romance show 90% of the movies that were made for kids had some kind of romance in them or they were like the Disney Classics that were played for everyone. Then you have like the rise of like what I like to call the Disney romcoms like Hannah Montana with her love triangle, High School musical, all of those shows. Romance and like finding the one or like the ideal partner was kind of just shove down our throats. Like I think one of my favorite all-time movies to rewatch was The Princess Diaries and literally the first one has like an entire semi love triangle going on between Mia her friend and the popular guy. It feels like there was just always some form of romance and like picking the right one that was just super prevalent.

So him craving that "the one" makes sense. Same with him Low key acting like a romance second lead character being super awkward overthinking things not knowing whether or not she should say something he shouldn't say something trying to be nonchalant etc.

[matthew-gray-gubler-lover]

All i want to do is make love to you. Spencer Reid Smut

Pretty much straight to SMUT just a few lines to explain how we got there.

Ages 18 and up. If you are under the age of 18, please do not read 

this story contains.

A lot of kissing. Oral sex, Female receiving. Fingering. Unprotected penetrative sex Reader is on birth control.

Please leave comments. They make me happy and motivate me to write more.

It's been 5 days since Spencer left for a case. You know that he was going to be coming home If the team was heading towards the jet.

 This gave you enough time to Go to the store and pick up a rotisserie chicken. You know that Spencer doesn't really eat very much when he's on a case, so you always try to make sure that he has a nice dinner when he gets home, or breakfast or lunch, depending on what time he had the day he makes it home. 

You also picked up some sides while you were at the grocery store. Some mashed potatoes. Some green beans and a pack of rolls. You also picked up a fruit tart for dessert, a cherry one. You know that Spencer likes cherries, so this will make him happy. 

When you got back from the grocery store, you put on a nice little outfit for Spencer. (Whatever outfit you have that you think that Spencer would love to see you in.)

You took the mashed potatoes and the green beans out and begin heating them up. You wanted to make sure that Spencer had a nice hot dinner to come home to. Just put the mashed potatoes into the pot when you heard the front door shut. Your heart began to race as you heard Spencer coming in the door. You were so happy to have him back home. 

"Welcome back honey". Was all you got out of your mouth is you were scooping the potatoes into the pot before you felt A set of arms wrapping around you. And lips planting on your neck. 

"I missed you so much honey. I don't know how I'm going to be able to continue doing this job if it means keep leaving you for so long. Five days. It was like torture. I could barely focus on the case." He told you is. He continued kissing your neck before making his way to your lips.

Missed you so much. He repeated before turning you around so that he could fully enjoy kissing you.

Missed you so much, he repeated again. Before scooping you up in his arms and carrying you straight to the bedroom. You begin to tingle in anticipation, knowing what was coming to you, and you Happily welcomed it. 

Spencer gently laid you down on the bed. Before gently removing. Skirt and your underwear. He couldn't wait to be with you.

He began licking you and moaning at your taste. You know that he can never get enough of you, and you feel exactly the same way about him. You were moaning mess just by his tongue and then he when he added two fingers, oh forget it. You were putty in his hands. Literally. You put your fingers through his hair as he brought you so much pleasure. Before you knew it, you were coming. Moaning his name over and over again.

He pulled his fingers out and wiped off his chin. "I could stay down there for hours you know?" He told you with a grin.

"But right now I really need to be inside of you" he told you as he started removing his shirt. It was so tantalizing to watch Slowly he unbuttoned his shirt. 

You're not really sure if he's doing it as slow as it seems. But it seems as though it's taking an eternity for him to get his shirt off. But you know he wouldn't do that to you, and he's probably going as fast as he can. Just the excitement is making it seem like it's taking it eternity. Finally, the shirt is off and you can see his beautiful chest. It's beautiful. It's this chest is though. You want to see his entire body Something that he finally allows you to have once the buttons are completely removed from his. Shirt.

"All I want to do is Make Love to you". He told you before removing his pants and underwear in one swift move. You whimper at the words is your eyes begin to fill with tears. Spencer loves you so much and you love him right back. he Kisses you before slowly pushing himself inside of you.

It's amazing, something that you'll never get Tired of.

He slowly. Thrusted in and out of you, fingers intertwined with yours. Having you oh so many kisses you thought that your lips would be melted together forever.

His gentle movements. His fingers Now no longer intertwined with yours. He Runs his fingertips gently up and down your arm. Your thigh, your hip. As he continues to kiss you and thrust so gently. But it still feels absolutely amazing. He truly is making love to you.

whispering things to you. "I love you so much" "I missed you". "I don't ever want to be away from you again". "You feel so amazing".

Only the two of you orgasm together. It's pure bliss after Spencer reluctantly pulls out. He lays next to you, the two of you panting in unison.

"I really did miss you". Spencer tells you as he's pulling your limp body towards his so that he can wrap his arms around you.

"i missed you too, more then you know"

"Well, I think I know, judging by How wet you were when I brought you in here". He told you with a chuckle.

"I can't help it. I love you so much I couldn't wait for you to be inside of me again. Are you hungry? As you could see, I was fixing dinner".

"I'm starving, actually, yes."

"Good, I have rotisserie chicken for you, and I also have a cherry tart for dessert".

" Cherry tart sounds delicious, but. Right now, I think that there's something else that I want to have for dessert". He told you with a wink is he brushed his finger over your Clit.

"Okay, naughty boy. We'll go for round 2 3 4 5, However many you want to go for after you eat".

"Promise?". He asked you with a slight pout, wishing that he could have you again right now.

"I promise".

The two of you had dinner, and true to his word, he brought you back into bed immediately and had his dessert. He had you coming on his tongue again in no time. The two of you spent the next two days that he had off in bed in romantic Bliss.

[radioactive-earthshine]

If I remember correctly, Meloni is not a speedster, right? But Don Allen was (though I seem to recall something about him being relatively weak as a speedster- sorry, I'm still new to comic books in general and this stuff was published before my parents were even ideas).

Do you think Bart is classified as a quarter of a biologically inherited speedster, a half, or something funky like three quarters or more or less due to being a Thawne as well? He's a full speedster, of course, but it's funny to think about the Punnett squares of it, to me!

Additionally, do we ever get any hints that Bart's brain remembers the short time he spent with the Dominators due to his memory? And, along those lines, how do you think his memory and status as a speedster would have affected his developmental milestones (in the sense of how fast or slow in comparison they'd have happened), given we know his mind had to be acclimated at hyperspeed as well and didn't just automatically/naturally age along with his body. If his aging had been normal from the start, how do you think having access to the speed force would have affected the way Bart learned to talk and how fast things like that happened?

Hello!

Meloni is not a speedster, right? But Don Allen was (though I seem to recall something about him being relatively weak as a speedster

As far as we know, Meloni does not have speedster powers, but she has enough of a connection to pass on said speed powers because of Owen Mercer, who was a lower-lever speedster himself. Don Allen was Barry's son and was born with his speed powers and he, with his sister, were both full speedsters. Their only problem was they had absolutely no one to teach them control or how to be speedsters. Additionally, due to the authoritarian regime of their birth time it was dangerous to be known as having powers so Iris raised them to keep it hidden as much as possible. This led to them being very inexperienced and hesitant to intervene in various situations where lives were on the line until Wally met them when they were young adults. Their inexperience also led to their deaths. Long story short - Don and Dawn were both 100% fully capable speedsters they just had no direction and spent MOST OF THEIR LIFE hiding it.

Do you think Bart is classified as a quarter of a biologically inherited speedster, a half, or something funky like three quarters or more or less due to being a Thawne as well?

I honestly don't think that's how it works with speedsters inheriting speed through a bloodline but idek. In DC you can become a full speedster connected through the Speed Force in many different ways that have nothing to do with bloodline. I feel like trying to parse out speed quantum through weird genetics gets muddy and it's easier to hand-wave it all off as "He got a double dose through his dad and mom" and be done with it.

Additionally, do we ever get any hints that Bart's brain remembers the short time he spent with the Dominators due to his memory?

We have no indication that Bart even remembers this, so it's likely he just doesn't remember his infancy and his eidetic memory doesn't go back that far. Just like with people who do exist in our world that have an eidetic memory. If he did remember this, then he would have known what his mother looked like, and he would have recognized her on sight. We don't know though, this is something not confirmed either way so... if you wanted to explore this as a theme there isn't much to say it couldn't happen. Additionally, Bart's eidetic memory had some subtle roots in his solo series but it wasn't a solidified ability of his until 2003 which does impact writing etc.

... how do you think his memory and status as a speedster would have affected his developmental milestones?

I feel like this would be a question better suited for a neuroscientist which I am not, I am an astronomy major. So anything I would say would be based on my limited understanding of human brain development. In the comics all of his development was heavily monitored by the best technology they had at the time and that alone is something I don't think we can truly grasp - it's science fiction, so there is going to be a lot of hand-waving the details. We know that they plugged him into VR so his brain was aging at the same rate as his body - his ability to speak, walk, run, toilet training, empathize etc were all things that clearly happened while he was plugged into VR. They clearly happened at some point but how it looked like is up in the air. He could have had an AI guardian, (Dox perhaps) that was there with him teaching him, or there were various scientists that assisted him as well. We just don't know how this all worked for him and his development. What I am also curious about is how much physical love and affection he got while in VR. Human infants need physical contact and love to thrive or they will fail to thrive, so he had to get this from someone.

If his aging had been normal from the start, how do you think having access to the speed force would have affected the way Bart learned to talk and how fast things like that happened?

We do have Don and Dawn Allen as two speedster that were born with speed powers that Iris was able to raise into functional people without and indication of issues, so it's very likely that with Bart there wouldn't be any problems with his development. It's likely he would experience various milestones at around the same time as other human children, he would just have speed. I don't know if having speed alone would accelerate someone's development. Bart's memory might be a thing that he obtained as he got older too so who knows. I do think there might be various challenges that would come with being an infant speedster; control for example and slipping into relative time. These two alone might pose challenges for their parent and the child but if a child is born as a speedster it's likely they would have a level of control others had to struggle to learn. We do see a brief moment that implies that Bart's speed control is unlike anything ever seen before when he on instinct alone was able to vibrate at a frequency to go through walls without being trained to do so. This sort of instinctual control might have been something he just learned to do because he was born with his speed and it's something even as a baby he just learned to cope with without training.

Thanks for the questions, I hope my rambling makes sense. Ignore any typos I am not editing this.

Note: this is for the comics and the comics alone, no other form of media.

[nausikaaa]

Seven Sentence Sunday

thanks for the tags @thewholelemon and @monbons!

i've been in a pretty big writing slump for the past couple of months, so i'm just reading a lot, trying to jumpstart my brain again, and occasionally i will get a flash of inspiration that allows me to write a few disparate paragraphs.

most recently i've gotten stuck in to Emily Hauser's Mythica, which is all about the archeology of women in the Bronze Age and how they tie into the Iliad and Odyssey. i'm really enjoying it, and it has been helping. i've written a few little snippets based on things that stood out to me, like the sheer amount of time and effort that went into weaving!

the chapter that really got to me was the one on Thetis, Achilles' mother. the chapter is all about ancient motherhood, and mostly how dangerous pregnancy, childbirth and infancy was. so yeah, a heads up for that below the cut.

it made me very upset but also very angry, because while some of it was unavoidable, such as a lack of medical knowledge and poor hygiene, some of it felt to me like it was such avoidable loss, done only because heirs were more valued than wives. the people of the past weren't stupid, they could observe cause and effect, and yet still so many mothers and babies died because women were given less food and far less protein than men (so their pelvises didn't grow wide enough, and they couldn't make enough milk to keep their babies well fed and protected from illness with antibodies), getting pregnant too young (again, the pelvises), and having too many back-to-back pregnancies (at a certain point they would just be too exhausted to survive the ordeal). why? because men wanted lots of babies fast, and didn't care if it devastated their wives to lose so many, or killed her just to bring about one son who lived.

of course, there were men who loved their wives, but it would appear from the historical record that far more simply didn't see them as equals, as fully human, and that massively coloured how they were treated.

sometimes i think about the women who must have come before me and the lives they led and i need to lie down, because it seems likely that for me to exist today, some of my ancestors likely led lives they rather wouldn't have, or died in order to bring about the next generation that ultimately led to me.

my novel involves a lot of pregnancy, birth and miscarriage. it's pretty much a given when writing about these characters, when the few sources we have clearly tell us that Andromache had somewhere between one and four more children after Troy fell and Hermione struggled with infertility. knowing the statistics of infant mortality at the time, it's a miracle all four of Andromache's children made it to adulthood, and it's likely some of Hermione's struggles were miscarriages or stillborns. and most of the men i write do care about their partners and children, because i don't want to be too much of a bummer.

so yeah. a character i only touch on briefly is Creusa, a princess of Troy, first wife of Aeneas, and a friend of Andromache, so here's a little bit about her from Andromache's point of view, using what i learned about bronze age infant burials.

When Creusa decided after her first stillbirth that she wanted to keep her lost child close, we did as many women did. She wrapped her baby in a painstakingly woven blanket, so it could know the softness she had intended for it, while I pried up the paving slabs in her small garden. We laid her child to rest there beside the flowers she grew, along with the toys Aeneas had carved in anticipation: small wooden horses, dolls and rattles.

Little did we know how many times we would have to repeat the grim ritual. After eight years, there was now a row of six uneven paving stones.

When Ascanius was born I held my breath, but with each passing day, instead of fading away, he grew stronger, and now he was thriving. I thought of the babies buried in the garden, their lives cut short for reasons we couldn't understand while the seventh child had been spared by the inscrutable will of the gods, the older siblings he would never know but whose graves he would walk over day after day.

Creusa did not survive the fall of Troy. as Aeneas escaped, he carried his elderly father and led his son by the hand, but Creusa got separated and died, though Virgil doesn't tell us her specific cause of death. Aeneas went back for her, but it was too late, instead he found her ghost, who asked him to care for their son. when Aeneas journeyed to the Underworld seven years later, he did not seek her out. Virgil doesn't say why. Andromache later reunited with Aeneas and Ascanius, giving the boy a cloak and asking him to remember her. the boy who lost his mother and the woman who lost her son. she must have looked at him and wondered about Astyanax, they were cousins after all. they were supposed to grow up together.

in my interpretation, her death at least has the bittersweet note that she would remain in the city, where her other children were buried, and find them in the Underworld.

...

jeez, what a ramble! i'll top this off with the news that my final goat, Lucy, had her kid on friday! a lovely little girl i've named Edith! i posted a bit more about it, including a video, here.

Lucy is a little under the weather now, but still being a very attentive mother.

and i tag @forabeatofadrum @cutestkilla @run-for-chamo-miles @roomwithanopenfire @prettygoododds @bookish-bogwitch @youarenevertooold @that-disabled-princess @noblecorgi @orange-peony @larkral @confused-bi-queer @aristocratic-otter @artsyunderstudy @alexalexinii @hushed-chorus @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @martsonmars @meanjeansjeans @leithillustration @j-trow-95 @blackberrysummerblog @ic3que3n and @bookishbroadwayandblind

[izzysillyhandsy]

It is finally time for me to try writing about The Scene.

There's so much happening and changing within seconds. I feel that the whole history of Edward and Izzy is played out here, for (from their point of view) the last time.

We start off with Ed waking Izzy up, taking out his pistol (to Izzy's confusion) and then handing it to Izzy.

They are close, Ed is calm and fully in the moment. It is such an intimate moment, the way Ed tilts his head down in line with the pistol, never breaking eye contact.

And Izzy, who at first was trying to fend Ed off, now looks at him like this:

What is actually going on here? It seems like a return to something they've done before, like a memory of a tender moment. Of course, this is right after Ed tells Iz about the dream. Maybe it's just the closeness, or the fact that this must be the first moment in forever where Izzy is the sole focus of Ed.

But I feel that there is a story there, something in their past that makes Izzy - what is it - happy? Nostalgic? Regretful? I don't see turned on here, it's much softer than that.

"Good for you." (slightly sneering) "It was good for me." (completely sincere)

You don't need me to tell you this has more than one meaning.

Ed touches Izzy's hand as he stands up, "It was just what the doctor ordered."

The first half ends - these were the good times. Spending time together with weapons aimed at each other :). I think this was when both were young and relatively innocent, when life was exciting and the two of them were best friends, possibly even closer than that.

But now the second half starts.

"Anyway, it wasn't even like that."

Also has a double meaning.

"No, in my dream - I was standing. Just like this."

Ed turns his back to Izzy, making this an execution instead of an act of intimacy.

Izzy first raises the pistol, laughs brokenly and desperately. It feels like this was also a situation they'd both been in before. The laugh sounds like "No, we're not doing this. Once was enough."

I think a similar scene happened when they were young, and the next bit strengthens this theory for me.

Izzy puts his hand over half his face, his voice changes and he calls Ed "Eddie" for the first and only time in the show:

"Oh, you're scared, Eddie? To sc- to scared to do it yourself?"

Hornigold also calls Ed "Eddie", and I think Izzy is kind of channeling Hornigold here. Maybe, back on Hornigold's ship, Ed was ordered to execute someone and couldn't. And maybe Izzy had to do it for him. Maybe Izzy had to do lots of traumatizing things for Ed. Maybe the person executed was someone Izzy and/or Ed cared about. And maybe Ed started to resent Izzy for it. The way Ed is spreading his arms out, the way it seems almost staged - it's like Ed is saying "kill me like you killed him".

OR maybe this is how Izzy pep-talked Ed into becoming Blackbeard, which would be much darker (and harder for me as an Izzy apologist). But Izzy telling Stede that Ed's complete breakdown is like 50% his fault may point to events in the past where Izzy thought he had to push Ed into the Kraken-zone to secure their and their crew's survival. Maybe he did this often, especially at the beginning of their Blackbeard fuckery.

What is remarkable though is that Izzy hides his face with his hand, then forces out the words, almost choking on them. This clearly has importance and history - nothing so far in the whole show was forced out so violently - so I am heavily leaning towards a traumatic experience for Ed and Izzy both. It definitely crashes Izzy down from his nostalgia-high real quick.

Now Izzy's voice changes back to his own, but he speaks really fast and without inflection, trying to get everything over with:

"Go on clean up your own fucking mess I'm not doing it I've been doing it all my fucking life."

(without thanks I might add)

"Fuck off."

Izzy's finally, finally had enough.

Ed acknowledges, resignedly, and leaves. I think he expected it to go this way.

Izzy shoots himself. I think Ed also expected this.

Ed says he loved him best he could. It's over. He goes to his own death.

This scene is only a few minutes long, but as I said in the beginning, I think they're reliving their whole relationship here, first the good times (which are quickly devalued - "But it wasn't even like that") and the bad times (I did this for you, but for nothing - "Fuck off").

As Ed says to Frenchie, he's had closure with Izzy. He's shown him what it was like for him. Izzy's also had closure with Ed. From now on, Ed has to carry the weight of his decisions himself.

Both die.

(and then both indestructible fuckers come back)

[dtmacgxstorys]

Frederick Kreiburg X Reader!

This is a Frederick Kreiburg/Conposer x Gender Neutral Reader! (I never have a solid plan, I just write whatever comes to mind!)

You haven't been at the Oletus Manor long, not even a week as passed yet. It took almost 3 days just to introduce them ether because they were shy or you were getting tired. From the moment Eli Clark, Victor Grantz & Luca Balsa introduced themselves, you knew that they would be good friends, but one guy caught your attention, Frederick Kreiburg! You have never interacted with the upper class before coming to the Oletus Manor, but you heard nothing good about them, but then again, you didn't look like you're in a low class. You couldn't help the blush on your face he took your hand & kissed your knuckles as he introduced himself.

The next day, you decided to explore some of the rooms you haven't seen yet. After some time walking, you find a room with a piano in it. You never had lessons on how to play, but every time you see a piano, you always sit down & start playing. You almost always play something huntingly beautiful. You play the piano for a while, you don't even notice that shortly after you started playing, some walked into the room & was slowly approaching. When you stop playing, he says: "...So how long have you been practicing." You nearly fall off the bench as you spin around. "So sorry, I didn't mean to startle you." "P-pract, I haven't eaten had any lessons. A-also don't sneak up on people like that." "... sorry." Is all he said, looking at you with an undeternal look. "Breakfast should be starting soon, do you mind if I sit with you?"

At breakfast, he ask: "have any other talents?" "I like to draw, but i don't like painting, what about you?" You ask. "...piano is all I know!" Is all he said. You both stay quiet for some time before he brakes it & ask: "Do you mind spending today with me?" "No, I don't mind." After breakfast, you walk with him & ask: "So, what are we doing?" "I want you to listen to me pract." "Oh,Ok." Is the last thing you say while heading back to the room. Back in the room, he ask: "can you please sit next to me?" "Ok." You say, doing as he asked as he sits down. He plays a somber but aggressive melody, he also plays much faster than you. He stopped mind key. "You ok?" You ask. "... you really never had lessons?" "Frederick, don't get hung up on that. You play so much better than me." ".... you don't even know how well you actually played?" He ask, looking at you. You can't fully see if he's angry or upset. "I know I play good enough to touch or move some people, but I can't compare to you." He looks away from you & starts to play something similar to what you played earlier. When he stops, you can't help but look at him in awe. He turned away from the piano & says: "You do." With that, he gets up & leaves.

As he leaves, you shoot up & cell out to he. "F-Frederick, Wait!" You exit the room & you see him looking back at you. "Frederick, I'm so sorry if I upset you, I didn't even think anyone was awake to hear me, I just started playing because it was there and-" "I don't know what I feeling, but I'm not upset because you can play as well as I do even though you never had lessons." "Oh" is all you can say. It's been 6 & a half months after that incident, but he did start taking with you shortly afterward, but your friends couldn't help but how much of your time Frederick is taking. One day at lunch, there is an open seat across from you, & Luca jumped at the opportunity. "Luca, No!" Victor & Eli tried to grab him, but he's too fast. Luca sits across from you & ask: "Sooo~ what are you two doing?" "Oh, hi Luca, just taking." You replie. "Luca, don't do this." Eli said. "You know Frederick, I didn't think you were the type to want to be friends just anyone?" Frederick just glares at Luca.

"Luca, enough! Let them eat in place." Victor said. "Why are you spending so much time with Y/N, Frederick?" "Luca, it's ok, Frederick isn't-" Luca cuts you off saying: "I Want To Hear Frederick Speak." Luca words made you jumb a little. "We both can play piano." Frederick replies. "Do you think I'm stupid, Frederick? That can't be all!" Victor & Eli on stand by if Luca becomes too violent. "... sorry Y/N, I think I should go." Frederick says as he gets up. "Frederick, please say & eat. Luca, what the fuck is your problem?" You ask. "I don't believe that this rich asshole gives a shit about you." Luca said, glaring as Frederick. Frederick finally spoke up: "even if I tell you the truth, you wouldn't believe me, Luca." With that, Frederick left. "Frederick!" You cell out but he continued out of the dining room. "Why do you even want to spen time with Him anyway Y/N?" You quickly replie: "Because I like him!" Luca looks at you, surprised. "Really?" All three of them say at the same time.

"Yes." Is all you said before leaving to find Frederick. You finally catch up to him. "Frederick, wait, are you ok?" He just stands there, not turning to face you. "... I'm fine." "Frederick please, please don't lie to me." He turns to face you, placing his hand on your cheek. "... Y/N,... i.... i can't right now." "Please Frederick, don't leave me in the dark." You said, putting your hands on his face. He looked surprised. "...Y/N..." He leans a little closer to you. "....I'm good now. Thank you, Y/N." He removes his hand & backs up. ".... I'm going to my room to relax." "Can I come?" You ask. "...ok." He held out his hand toward you. You take it & follow him.

He opens the door & lets you in first, closing the door behind him. He walks over to his bed & lies down. "You can lie next to me." You do exactly that & ask: "Do you want to talk or no?" "Not really." He replies. The two of you lie in silence for a long time before he suddenly sits up. "You ok Frederick?" He just sits there, quiet for a moment. "...why do you want to be here, with me right now?" You pause, unsure how to answer. You decide to confess. "Because... because I love you Frederick." He turns to you, surprised from the words. "...Me, you like me?" "Yes Frederick, You, I love you so much!" He turns away from you & looks at the floor.

"... you're not trying to just get sex out of me, you mean it?" "No, absolutely not. I love you, I love being here with you." He turns back to you. "Then come here." You crawl over to him and sit on your knees. He pulls a hand on your cheek & leans closer to you, kissing you on the lips. You wrap your arms around his neck, leaning into him. After a long, passionate kiss , he finally pulled away, looking at you with a loving look. "Do you wanna cuddle for a while, I'm big spon if so?" "Sounds good to me!"

End!

It's 3:01 am & Don't care if this is in character!