#and a lot of ppl sure do like him if my old art is still gettin notes

[kagooleo]

stuck in mayday crunch but I’ve been doodling the boyyyy

[bendyartistic]

Be Aware of alexbstudios. (Part 2) TW: uh.. slur, sui mention.

Recently I've been requested by some people to make another awareness post about Alex, and what has been going on since I made my last callout. So.. let's take a look. I'm gonna be honest I have been paying little to no attention to him at all since my post up until this point, didn't think I'd have to.

Ever since I made it, Alex has been talking about me a lot more, and it feels much more obsessive in a way. I think it's funny but also pretty weird considering some of the things he's said about me. Eugh.

Anyways let's get to the stuff from after my callout to the present. This is just a rundown of everything, and there is some stuff I skipped since I didn't feel it was worth mentioning. Once my post had been made, a lot of people went over and said stuff to him (Though I didn't encourage that behavior, I only wanted to make my post so people knew about him, I'm not covering those unless it's important in this.) Little afterwards he made this... post. Erh, are you stalking me and other people?? ALSO don't say the r slur man, like what.

I find it really creepy that he has this list, and has notes along with them about why/who they are. Also why'd he spell my partners name like that? 💀 Next a little after that he reblogged someone's art and introduction saying this. (I don't want to really @ people in this, nor get anyone involved unless they asked to be.)

I still don't understand how Alex views me, but saying this in a reblog no less is so strange. Reblogging another post, saying this with it...

You're right Alex, I didn't need you in my life, yet here we are. Unfortunately. Besides that, no, 12 year old's should NOT be on Tumblr at all, even with restrictions, said restriction should be having the app blocked from their device.

I'm just gonna.. move on from that. Alex reblogged an art post, where he proceeded to @ over 50 people, myself included, saying "surely you can see the problem". I can't fit the entire thing sadly. I don't get what the point in these posts are honestly, besides annoy everyone. He's done it before as well. He got into a small bit of beef with a handful of folk not too long ago, which I got @'ed in at some point I think, didn't really pay much attention to it. Basically the original post is someone talking about art supplies and asking what one's other people use, which I personally think was a very neat post. Alex comes around though for some reason going off on nonsense. Hello? Who invited you!? (Again, censoring names cuz I don't want to get ppl involved.)

I'm honestly kind of wondering why he even showed up. He pretty soon after made this dumb post as if it could have some effect on the situation.. uh?

I guess mark your calendars guys for this date, where we have to immediately forget everything and forgive him! /j And there's this response he gave to an anon responding to his ✨patience✨ post.

Dunno, so far it hasn't because he's still talking about it, so clearly he hasn't gotten over it enough to let it blow over.

He's giving me those like.. stupid sigma edit vibes sometimes. Y'know what I'm talking about? Yeah. Also I'm not sure what to say about this really, but it's pretty funny.

Context for this next one: You and the person on your lockscreen fight god..? That's a weird one.

Wdym racist though? 🤨 Genuinely kinda curious about that. Btw wouldn't that make you like.. 9?? On a different note, I saw him previously talk about this "friend" he has going to a mental hospital, but I know nothing about it, nor do I really want to, however reblogging on an art post saying this feels off. Think the emotes are what do it.

Don't joke about mental hospitals at all, I shouldn't have to explain why. I'm going to move on from all the short stuff now because I do wanna start talking instead of making short joking comments.

Alex made this post, and so it begins with him talking about me again, eh?

Alex, you're already doomed. I can't put it any other way but from what I've seen maybe only 1 or 2 people even like you. The rest either hate you or want to avoid you at all cost, and I don't blame them at all considering you act like a fool and make everyone uncomfortable.

For my thoughts on you? I don't like you, never did. I just have to put up with you because this is the internet, and you'll probably never truly leave me alone like I once hoped. It's a shame honestly that you cannot follow a simple request from anyone. Don't think I don't know about your planned "response post" you're making, I'm still waiting for it. I don't know what good it's gonna do you though. Personally I don't care if you make one, I'd just read it to see the stuff you make up in it lol. (Edit: He decided to stop working on it after seeing this post lol.)

Enough of my rambling, I should continue with this so I can stop talking about him sooner. Regrettably I had to actually look up what this was about, I felt.. iffy reading it.

Saying gyatt right afterwards wasn't funny. At all. I'm quite upset now. There was absolutely no reason for that.

I was gonna be reasonable and say something genuine but I don't feel like it anymore, this ruined my mood. All I have to say is as much as I dislike you, don't actually do that. Sadly moving to the next nonsensical thing, he made a poll post asking this. (It's still ongoing btw)

Are people like.. forced into giving a reason? Like if I for example chose Bendy, am I immediately supposed to state my reasons? What if I don't want to, are we being held at gunpoint? What's up with that? I'm too lazy to interact with the post, I don't really feel like it anyways even if I wasn't lazy. Which one would you choose though lol I'm going to be serious now again cause this last thing is really just.. what the fuck. Palestine related 🍉, someone asking for help came to Alex, and this was his response to it...

MY GOD Alex. Did you really have to respond to that in this immature, insensitive fucking manner? Could it have not been in one of your stupid rambling posts. It should've been. I'm sorry to the person and I'm sorry I had to read it. You're pretty sick honestly. You need help.

That's it. I'm done.

In conclusion:

Alex is still the same and is still never going to change probably. He still shouldn't be here and I believe he really should get off now more than ever. If not I fear what else he might do next.

All I can really tell you folks is please, DNI with Alex, just leave him alone and block him. You're again not obligated to, but I am suggesting it if you want to be left alone by him. And hey, maybe you'll make it onto his dumb creepy list too, who knows. Alright, I'm finished, I stayed up way too late for this... I'm tired. Cya.

Reblogs are much appreciated, it helps spread the word, thanks.

[nonbinaryeggrolls]

When Someone Tries to Touch Your Hair

JJK men x gn black!reader

I had this idea for a little while and I absolutely love it. As someone who has to literally fight off ppl with a stick to keep them from basically "petting" me, I thought it would be so cute to write about the JJK men sticking up for you

Warnings: Fluff!, no nsfw but MINORS ARE STILL NOT ALLOWED GO AWAY, angst in Gojo's, specified braids/locs/twists in Toji's, unwanted physical touch, I think that's it!

Starring: Nanami Kento, Toji Fushiguro, Gojo Satoru

MINORS DNI. AGELESS AND MINOR BLOGS WILL BE BLOCKED

Nanami Kento

Of course he remains calm, he's always calm. but trust, inside he is BOILING with anger

Kento adores your hair, it sounds weird but he loves watching you on wash day care and tend to your hair with such detail and precision. Apart of it is so he can learn to do it himself one day so you won't have to spend so much time doing it yourself

He's always buying the best products for you no matter how expensive he knows black hair care products can be.

Design Essentials, Creme of Nature, Mielle, jojoba oil, tea tree oil, hair masks, curling cream-- you name it (or even glance at it in the store) he's already bought it for you

So seeing someone disrespect you by even attempting to touch you makes him absolutely livid

Kento: "I don't know I didn't think it was all that great, the plot didn't really make a lot of sense." Kento said as you two walked out the doors of the movie theater.

Y/N: "What?! I thought it was good, you're always hating on superhero movies you're like an old person. Oh! the boba place closes at 9:30 did you still wanna--

"Oh my gosh I just have to ask who does your hair? It's so pretty!" A young woman around your age popped up from behind you guys, her intensity kind of startling you a little bit

Y/N: "Oh, thank you that's so sweet! I actually do it myself" you smiled and she looked at you in astonishment

"Really? Wow it looks like it was done by a professional, I bet it takes you so long!"

Kento's eyebrow raise and body stiffen in an almost defensive way, he was already anticipating what was coming next

Y/N: "Yeah, sometimes it can. It kind of just depends on how tired I am that d--

Your body leaned back as she reached out to grab the top of your head. Kento wrapped his arm around you and pulled you back by your shoulders, shooting daggers at the woman as if she had just committed an unforgivable act

Kento: "Please step back. You don't need to touch them to compliment them." he reprimanded and held a firmer grip on your shoulder. He wasn't going to yell at a woman he didn't know but he sure as hell was going to get his point across

"O-oh Im sorry I didn't mean anything by it. I just think it looks really ni--

Kento: "Then you can think it's nice from a distance, they're not a dog. Have a good night." Kento intwined your hand in his and led you away to the car. You looked up at him and a small grin grew across your face

Kento: "Don't look at me like that."

Y/N: "You're like a guard dog. Like a snappy little golden retriever." you giggled before planting a kiss on his jaw which he returned with one on the top of your head

Kento: "Cmon lets go get boba."

Toji Fushiguro

Rage, Rage, and more RAGE

The anger that fills this mans body when someone tries to touch you is immeasurable, ESPECIALLY if its a man

Sometimes you have to calm Toji down when someone tries but its no use, he's already out of his seat and practically ready to kill

Toji is definitely someone who values his personal space, so he completely understood your frustration when you talked about how crazy it is that some people think its okay to try and touch you without permission

He's only seen it happen a few times, thankfully most people had common sense. But there was always that one asshole that crosses the line

You and Toji were out on a late night supply run getting items for Megumis science fair project. You roamed through the aisles of the arts and craft store filling your basket with acrylic paint, styrofoam blocks, construction paper and glue sticks

Toji: "What kind of fifth grader does a science project on soil erosion? Can't we just do something normal like a volcano or something?"

Y/N: "Are you gonna keep complaining all night or are you gonna actually help find everything on the list?" You turned around mad dogging him, both of you were tired and a little bit cranky and snappy at one another. Most of it was playful but some of it intended

Toji: "You look like a pig when you scrunch your knows like that." He chuckled attempting to pull you in for a kiss

Y/N: "You bitch-- Go get someone to open the spraypaints for us!" You said shoving your hand in his face and pushing his head back. Toji sauntered away to find the nearest employee to assist you guys

You stood alone in the aisle for a few minutes scrolling through instagram to pass the time until Toji came back, until a tap on your shoulder caught your attention. A random man, had approached you attempting to spark a conversation. Your eyes jotted back and forth around the area wondering where tf could Toji be and why was he taking so long to get back

"You got a really pretty smile you know that? Pretty hair too, you do this all by yourself?" He asked and took one of your (protective style)'s in his hands

Toji: "Now you..." Toji came up behind the man and planted a firm grip on his shoulder, "...are way too ugly and way too short to think they'd ever want someone like you to touch them. Don't you think?"

The man trembled in place at the vast size difference between the two

"I--"

He couldn't get a whole sentence in before Toji pulled him back by his hair then slammed him head first into the shelves next to him, making the man scream in pain. The star captured the attention of multiple employees and needless to say it wasn't long until you were being led out of the building by security.

Toji: "Did I do too much again?" He asked from the passenger seat, knowing full well he didn't regret his actions

Y/N: "We just got banned from the store, what do you think Toji?"

Toji: "Are you mad at me?"

Y/N: "Yes I'm mad!"

Toji: "Mm. The blush on your face doesn't look like someone who'd be mad at me." He grinned and you tried to hide the smile that started to form

Y/N: "Shut the fuck up."

Gojo Satoru

Gojo unfortunately was very ignorant to the topic at first

Maybe it was a cultural difference but when you told him people would ask to touch your hair he thought it wasn’t that big of a deal

“If someone admired your hair so much that they want to get close to it shouldn’t that be a compliment to you? It’s like they’re complimenting an artist for their artwork right? I don’t really see the harm in that, I touch Getos hair all the time and he's fine with it.” He said once before

Nonetheless it led to a very heated argument

He didn’t understand all the fuss around it, that was until he saw it actually happen

Seeing how physically uncomfortable you get when someone you don’t know tries to “pet” you put it all in perspective for him

Y/N: “Gojo, hurry we’re gonna miss the train!” You shouted as you ran through the subway station

Gojo: “I’m coming slow down! I don’t wanna drop anything.” He followed closely behind carrying the other bags of groceries you guys got from the farmers market

You both managed to slip through the train doors in time before it departed. You two managed to find two seats by the window, it was a preferred spot that way you both could gaze upon the countryside greenery as you passed on your way back to the city. Gojo leaned against the window and you leaned against his shoulder, the both of you trying to get some rest after a full day of walking.

The train stopped at its next spot to let on a few more passengers and a tap on your shoulder shook you out of your rest.

“Can i touch your hair?” a young woman behind you asked, but she had already reached out her hand before you could even answer. You pulled back before her hand could touch you

“Oh, um no please don’t do that…” you awkwardly said and turned back around. You looked over at Gojo who you know heard everything but was undermining the situation yet again

Gojo: “Calm down she didn’t mean anything by it, go back to sleep.” He dismissed you, not even bothering to open his eyes as he still laid against the window. You let out a low scoff and laid back against your seat instead of Gojos shoulder like you were before

The next few minutes we’re quiet as you dozed back off until you heard a loud camera click and could hear the girl frantically trying to turn the volume down

Y/N: “Did you just take a picture of me?”

“Oh it wasn't a bad one I was just sending your hairstyle to my friend I think it’s cute.”

Y/N: “I don’t care. Don’t take a fucking picture of me if—

“I didn’t even touch you so calm the fuck down…this is why no body likes to compliment you people anyways. You take everything too goddamn seriously.” she muttered the last bit under her breath but still loud enough to pick up. This sentence being the one that finally caught Gojos attention

Gojo: “What was that?” He stood up towering over the young woman

“I-I didn’t say anyth— I’m s-sor—

Gojo: “Shut up. Delete it. Now.” His eyes pierced through her and she scrambled to reopen her camera and delete the photos. She flipped the phone towards his face to show that they were no longer in her folder

Gojo: “Now go to a different seat. And if you touch them against i’ll smash that stupid fucking phone into the fucking concrete.” The young woman ran from her seat to the other side of the train as quickly as possible and Gojo sat back down. He attempted to put his arm around you but you wanted no part in it, for the next 30 minutes you ignored every attempt he made to get a word out of you. Even on the walk home you were cold

Gojo: “Y/N if you don’t tell me what’s wrong I can’t fix it!” he said as you entered your apartment

Y/N: “IVE TOLD YOU WHATS WRONG BEFORE. YOU DONT LISTEN!” you yelled, something he rarely heard you do, “I told you countless times before that people trying to touch me is a reoccurring problem for me and what did you do? You belittled me and made it seem like no big deal. Why did it take someone being blatantly racist towards me for you to actually start caring? Why did I have to prove the problem to you?” He looked back at you with no words just a stunned expression as he struggled to find the right thing to say

Gojo: “I…I don’t know. I’m sorry.” you rolled your eyes at his lackluster reply and turned away to the bedroom

Y/N: “Whatever. I’m going to bed.”

Gojo: “Y/N, wait I—

you slammed the door in his face before he could finish his sentence

story belongs to @nonbinaryeggrolls

do not steal

[s1llydr3amscape]

Happy 10th anniversary fnaf wahhh <333333 I can't believe I've been drawing for this accursed franchise for a decade goddamn!!!

I'm gonna be all sappy but ohhhh this franchise is my blood and soul and I love and breathe cuz off it <333333

To start this national holiday for me atleast I wanted to show off my plethora of old fnaf art I made over the years so be warned!!!! Not in order which is something I regret for not putting dates on my stuff.

Very long and I mean it :

Starting off fnaf x mlp 😭😭😭 I loved mlp and then I saw so much of those fnaf mlp speed paints and had an epiphany and made my own because I hated how everyone made them bald </3

Now for the apple of my eye back in the day.... Foxy!!!! I loved him so much it made me violent. My self insert was this brown cat with blue eyes and yellow and blue hair. She was also half bat and had bat wings!!!! She and Foxy were my everything and I drew them so much that Foxy was the fnaf character I had the most art off (then came vanny...) Since I was a Foxy fangirl I got jealous seeing ppl shipping him with Mangle because I loved Fnaf 1 Foxy so much but ppl kept shipping him with Mangle and not Fnaf 2 Withered Foxy so I ended up hating them 💀 I am not uploading the full comic to this over my dead body, reading it made my skeleton run away. I was so mean to Mangle bro they did not deserve any of that!!!

Whats worse is Foxy wasn't the only person that had feelings for Blueberry. Incoming Springtrap 😭😭😭😭 As a kid I hated him so much and then my irl showed me cute fanart for him one day because she had a crush on him and I was instantly hooked. He ended up becoming the character i fixated on till this day like me and her have been through a lot literally in everything (Springtrap made me question my gender lmao)

What I mean is like she's bigender like me teehee!!! I was obsessed with giving all the fnaf characters hair and god :[ need me a big bald headed rabbit... he's so ugly here I can't 😭😭 Goofy ass Alastor ass smile fake ass wig

I think this one is more recent when I first started highschool. but like Springtrap the gender breaker fr fr!!!! Why is bro goopy well you see I didn't like William Afton because I loved the Bunny way more and so what happened was William somehow got ejected from Springtrap leaving the suit hollow unable to move. Yet it did and Springtrap was born using the blood William left behind she was goopy and always bleeding and limping and he hated being alive and was emo 😭 What gucci bro is butt booty naked!!!!!

IM SORRY MANGLE I LOVE YOU!!! YOU DONT DESERVE ALL THE HATE I GAVE!!! I'm pretty sure the one where their holding Blueberry is traced off a speed paint because that does not look like something I'd draw!!!!! I don't blame her for cutting up Blueberry they deserved to after the shit i put em through 😭😭😭😭

More Foxberry art. OMG they had so much art it was insane!!!! if it weren't for the fact I had to move a bit in one part of my life we'd have seen more off my art of the other fnaf characters but we keep moving foward!!!! I know for a fact one of these is traced!!!! They had so much comics together but I'm not going to torture anyone with reading that slop 😭😭😭 they got married and had 2 kids </333333

I can't take this blue eyed freak seriously!!! I hate and love her so much it's unreal </3 She had her own gang off ocs that was a rival company to Fazbears!!! But the main star off her rival company was actually secretly the love child and was the younger brother of Freddy Fazbear!!!!

And after a furry cat serial killer killed the children and stuffed them in the suits he burned the place down after 5 years?! Making the animatronics run to safety to Fazbears...

Blueberry is just your average Y/N protagonist so dainty and UwU smol bean can do no wrong!!!! She has a sister who was my friends self insert that was just there to be my sister... I still have all their refsheets and my god the others ocs designs feel like I pressed randomised on a gacha game!!!!! Not to mention how I just stole fnaf characters and turned them into cats!?!? One of them was named Spacey The Cat for crying out loud!!!! And I even had an oc named Miss Smile The Cat who I know was just an artist I got inspired by and made an oc off of 💀

What even is that thing freaking maple syrup looking ghost ass this isn't even the worse oc 😭😭😭 say hello to Eely and Steve who I made based off of Mangle because I thought I could make a better Mangle (You can't fix peak) I hate this thing and it shouldn't exist 😭😭😭 Why tf would a candy parlor shop have a fucking eel?!?!?! What even how what?!?!?

OK, so plot for this Foxy x Blueberry story is a real doozy!!! I remembered getting hate by youtubers bigger than me as a kid for self shipping with Foxy because erm actually he's a dead child!!!! Which doesn't make sense because the friends of said youtubers self shipped with Foxy too, and they were older than me (I was 12). Like back then I was just attracted to this red fox pirate I didnt need to get dogpilled by sans fangirls and adults omg cringe culture was so rampant back then!!!! I vowed on that day to never hate on anyone for self shipping no matter what!!!!

Blueberry was also just changed due to this. I hated how I got hate and how people were making smear campaigns with ny ocs by older people!!! So in her story with Foxy at the end of it she dies. Like point blank she dies straight up with her and Foxys kids 😭😭😭😭 And he has to live with the guilt and memories of their love and what he lost. Like what?!?!!?

But to summarise all her comics. Blueberry and friends get killed similarly to how Foxy and his friends did. Get stuffed in suits at this candy palace and forced to play pretend as these animatronics. Until the furry cat killer came back set the place on fire and they fled to Fazbears. Where it was apparently just a huge establishment with all the fnaf animatronics from fnaf 1 to 4. Mangle has crush on Foxy but he doesn't reciprocate because he's sigma alpha and then these new guys show up and Foxy goes awoooga to the new girl!!!!

Like they were literally the bad boy x good girl trope 😭😭😭 But Foxy was just bad at everything and she was just way to nice and refused to kill people!!! Mangle hated Blueberry for getting Foxys attention and hurted her really really badly and ran away. They didn't know why they did that and Springtrap (scroll up) freaking put Mangle in a coma. Cuz in this story he had the ability to freaking control people with souls and used an evil spirit soul to make Mangle hurt Blueberry.

Anyways Springtrap did that souk thing to make Mangle get with Foxy so she can get with Blueberry but it backfired because off bloodlust. Yeah idk literally that's just the explanation bloodlust. So yeah Foxy and Blueberry dated and were silly and Springtrap and or Mangle would capture her and torture either her or Foxy and yeah.

They ended up finally stopping Springtrap by crushing him in a trash compactor and Mangle fell in love with Eely instead 💀 Then Foxy and Blueberry settled down and had kids. Yet it didn't end there as Springtrap ALWAYS COMES BACK (this was pre ffps and was based on the fnaf sl theory that springtrap showed up cuz he was in Circus Baby's nose relfection) And he had enough of losing to Foxy...

If I can't have her then no one can and killed her and her kids with a freaking evil spirit that set their souls free leaving them empty husks unmoving. And they stayed deactivated until the company threw them away for collecting dust and left them in the storage room to rot 4ever. Like wtf 😭😭😭

Ok enough yapping!!! Later on I changed my ways and I love Mangle now so much and Glithctrap showed up. I ended up getting fixated on them too!!! Sorry for TwinkTrap... but he always has that middle stitch in the centre of its head because well the first ever fanart I drew of em had it and I'm a huge sap... I was in a very specific fnaf circle who furryfied the animatronics and you can tell very much!!!!

I have more off these designs but they're soo catered to me and are practically just ocs at this point so idk yet if I'm brave enough to show em!!! The 180 on my Glitchtrap though my god!!!!! That twinktrap design is so silly to me but I'm keeping it as like Glitchtrap’s cool persona that they use to seem more friendly because Idk I like the swirlies in its design <333

Also shout out to Mangle with 3 tails and floppy ears!!!!! My lil bro loves them so so much he gave me the idea love that guy idk how he can stand me yapping abt the franchise. Atleast I know I made it because his friends come to me to ask abt the lore :]

I need to make a part 2 off this post because phew it's getting pretty long and I maxed out the image limit Oops!!!!

[everythingendsbutcomicsr4ever]

((This originally comes as my response to someone saying that ppl don’t like The Sun and The Star because it’s a middle school book and we were expecting the series to grow along with us.))

Valid point I keep finding BUT I recently read the PJO series again in preparation for TSATS and those books still slap!! They’re so good even tho I’m reading them as an adult even though they're meant for kids. (Also I recently read ToA because of course I’m gonna keep reading Rick’s middle school books until the day I die or they stop coming out lol. And that series while more goofy at points I still really liked) I also read one of Mark Oshiro's other books in prep for this book because I was excited for The Sun and Star to be released and I just COULD NOT get through it 😭 the writing was just giving me the ick and the characters where all kind of samie like that sassy talking wit. Which was a bummer because I liked the premise of the book “Anger is a Gift”, which was about underfunded schools mainly facing ppl of color and immigrants which leads to the school-to-prison pipeline because of the defunct way America funds public schools that keeps the poor poor and the rich getting richer & it was ACAB & had a lot of queer representation & etc. So I thought I’d really like it but I just couldn’t get through it because of the writing and I noticed this same writing style showing up in TSATS. Just because it’s for kids doesn’t excuse it from being bad. Like early Pixar and Studio Ghibli is still so good to watch back again and my 50+ yrs old parents like it. Book examples would be Harry Potter (screw JK Rowling tho fr) & the The Little Prince

Not to bash on ppl who say this is the main reason ppl don’t like the book but it feels like a straw man argument to say that the books not growing with us is the main reason ppl didnt like it. All tho I’m sure ppl have argued this but that is definitely their fault because Rick is staying in middle-grade fiction forever like that’s his thing! Why would ppl expect different 🤣 You think he wants to write a sex scene?! LMAO

(Here’s my review, it’s unhinged and not great because I should be doing productive stuff but am distracted until I can at least write down some of my thoughts on my disappointing experience)

Here are some things I didn’t like about it from a piece of art standpoint:

The pacing was bad

This book was filled with the first thing they teach you about writing which is: SHOW don’t TELL

It made me not ship Solangelo surprisingly like how??! I used to love Solangelo but I think this mainly is because of the collective consciousness of the fandom and because we wanted Nico to find happiness with someone. But if you really look back on their moments canonically from the books Will is a background character (who honestly kind of gaslights Nico by invalidating that ppl treated him differently as a son of Hades and that he didn't feel welcome at camp) and they kind of have a quick meet cute in the last book of The Last Olympian. They get together without us seeing their developing relationship and we now know they’re dating in The Trials of Apollo where we see them briefly in the first book and then more so in the last book. Honestly, this canonically alone doesn’t give me enough information or examples to really know or care about their relationship in comparison to Percy and Annabeth who we get to see develop. So TSATS just kind of felt hollow to me because I’m supposed to believe they’d die for each other but I DONT KNOW THE POWER OF THEIR LOVE?? This could just be a first love fling type thing like I was never shown the depth of their romance just told constantly in the book how much they love each other so it just felt kind of empty and emotionally unsatisfying to me.

Solangelo's relationship has always been in the background and the fans are what really made it cause we love Nico and want him to be happy. So when Will and Nico are fighting in this book all I can think is that this is just their relationship period.

So the reason it made me not like Solangelo was because Tarturus was supposed to bring out the worst in them and strain their relationship but, like, I haven’t really seen much of their relationship so I don’t have a “control group” to base this off of. So Will just seemed rude when he was so mean about Nico’s underworld home and about Nico's darkness which I also didn’t understand wtf he was talking about because Nico has killed just as many monsters as other campers and what else was his darknes based off of. cause he’s emo/goth?? Cause he can raise the dead?? Like guys we’ve discussed this just because a character wears black doesn't automatically make them the bad guy. I honestly thought Will just thought that was hot and they’d have that normie x alt relationship dynamic (that meme of: My hot witch wife. Me doing whatever she wants) I thought THAT was Solangelo not Will constantly trying to bring this light side to him and trying to change him. I agree that Nico needs help w his trauma and PTSD and things like that but this felt like if someone tried to “cure” a goth person, like actually screw you

I thought Will was supposed to look like a normie but be secretly a freak (in a good way lol) / goth interest. Cause this is meee I thought I was like Will as someone who looks like a normie and has a sunny disposition but I have a lot of alt/goth interests and I would let an alt girlie step all over me tbh lol. So does he like Nico for who he is or not?!

This is more in line w what I thought their relationship was like lol:

The flashbacks and forwards I thought were ok even if they took you out of the story a bit but this device is supposed to be used for an IMPORTANT event not just as a way to quickly give context to their relationship and when we got to the scene this was taking place in I was like that’s it?? He what? fell down and is suffering from sun withdrawals and this is the book's big moment to justify jarring flashback scenes?

Mark Oshiro is not a fantasy adventure or horror writer and it shows. Maybe it’s just me but their depiction of Tarturus and the nightmare and the journey were just not up to snuff with good horror and fantasy books I’ve read. (And if your gonna say something about how it’s for kids then I raise you the book series “Goosbumps”) So as a genre in itself, it was just disappointing. It was mainly a relationship guidebook book but I didn’t really like that or feel like it was done well, It felt lectury and also idk if that's the genre middle schoolers really like?? 😅

It had too many references which really dates a book, A lot of professional writers say not to use too much slang or modernreferences (unless you’re trying to make a book expressly about a time period) because it really dates a book and doesn’t make a story feel timeless for future generations if you use too many references (this doesn’t include political novels tho which are very much based in that time when the events happening) Anyways for future writers keep this in mind, you don't need to keep in touch with the youth through urban dictionary you can just write about the emotions of being young or whatever. If you’ve tried to read a comic book aimed at teens from the 50s like I have you’ll realise how funny that is.

(Also the carebear reference that I didn’t even understand and I watched carebear as a kid & Lil Nas video which if this was written for kids that music video feels a bit inappropriate for them 😂 it had a reference both too old and too young for middle schoolers AND how in the world would 1930s born, dropped out of elementary school, can’t use the internet or phones half blood, NICO DI ANGELO know these references???)

The writings giving:

Bad alt representation. (This is my most out-of-pocket opinionated bullet point rant so if you don't agree that’s a-okay :D ) This could be a whole post in itself but although I know ppl joke about Nico as the Emo kid I would really like to get into how Nico is actually, or it would be cool, as having some goth subculture inclinations. And ppl probably think of Trad Goths with the whole makeup and teased hair look but it’s mainly a music-based subculture and/or it just has a different idealogy around the ideas of death and what is deemed beautiful while most ppl see it as ugly. (Like listen to “Gallows Dance” or the Bauhaus's “Bela Lugosi’s Dead” & “The Passion of Lovers”, to name songs off the top of my head) This bullet point is definitely MY OPINION and doesn’t contribute exactly to the book being bad but aren’t those songs the vibe of an underworld kid like Nico?? Embracing the darkness and dancing in graveyard vibes fr!! Anyways most alt subcultures and especially emo are seen as a phase in life that you grow out of and then become normal. This book just really gives the energy of being written by a normie who would be confused by the choices of alt ppl and just doesn’t get it because it’s not their personal interest, which isn’t exactly bad even tho I want more philosophy from Nico on the chillness and acceptance of death (all tho greek mythologies view on the afterlife sucks fr and THAT is a whole other post haha) So this isn’t exactly a problem BUT what gives me the ick is WILL NOT ACCEPTING THESE THINGS LIKE SIR STOP BASHING YOUR BOYFRIENDS LIFE!! Will asking Persephonee, “How do you love someone from the underworld” SHUT UP!! 😤

Will was useless and I know what they were trying to go for but if I had a girlfriend (oh I’m a lesbian btw just in case ppl think I’m going harder on this book more than the other books because I’m homophobic bruh I swear I’m not I’m only disappointed in the art itself, NOT the representation which I actually liked) and if I was super good at fighting and they weren’t, I’m sorry but I wouldn’t take them BECAUSE of my love for them. If they were going to be useless on a mission of such life-threatening danger and importance I WOULD NOT TAKE THEM OUT OF KINDNESS. Like skills in medicine and art and music are great and there’s of course nothing wrong w not being a badass fighter (lmao this is me and most readers) but then DONT GO TO SUPER HELL!!! Especially if you have something that makes you more pathetic than being a normal human in Tarturus, his suffering from no sunlight is out of pocket and just makes the story draggg and makes him seem boring and the story more boring. I know they were trying to go for a fish out of water storyline and roll reversal but I think it wasn’t done well enough and overall hurt the story

Also, I’ve heard ppl talk about how it would have been nice to have a book focus on their relationship while at Camp Half-Blood. Like maybe it takes place pre Jason's death and we can just see them living at camp. It’d be chill and we can actually see them as a couple & It would give the energy of readers wanting to go to camp half-blood again like how everyone wanted to go to Hogwarts. Cause we haven’t seen the camp as a fun home since the very early PJO books ;-; (this is just a fun idea I like and I think would have been more manageable for an author but this is FR my opinion on a fun book idea i’d like to read) ALSO this would have been so nostalgic for the older readers who have been here since middle school gobbling up this universe 😌

I know ppl get mad at ppl making fun of Will for being pathetic in tarturous. As saying he’s a child and no one can be happy and sunny and doing well 24/7 which is valid but that’s not really my argument. I like watching characters put in situations where we watch them bend against what we thought they were when put in a hard situation (the masochist in me lol jkjjk). But this I think didn’t work for me because as I’ve said before he’s mainly a background character at the end of one book thrown together with Nico and we as a fandom have mainly made him up. Also, Tarturus was just not as scary or adventure-filled as like any of the other missions from previous PJO books, It didn’t feel as trauma-inducing as everyone in the series tried to explain it as. (again show not tell from the book) Also, I would have liked to have seen Will cool at least once or one reason for me to like him with Nico but I saw him as pretty bland as a character

The writing style felt bad to me because of the show don’t tell part for example telling as “it made him sad and traumatized” when showing would be, you know, actually showing the scenes and this book just felt like 80% telling what they were feeling instead of letting the reader feel the emotions of the scene for themselves

I think that’s another thing I really didn’t like related to the Show Don't Tell. And another hallmark of bad writing was this book was really telling the audience how to feel instead of allowing the story to be powerful enough to do that for itself. This book follows a trend I’ve seen a lot in TV shows where everything kind of feels like detached irony from being on Twitter where you hear everyone’s opinions so the story is written as a wink and a nod like we know what we’re doing and we know what your thinking and how twitter will react to it. Like it’s hard to describe this trend I’ve mainly seen in TV shows and movies recently which always gives me the ick cause it doesn’t feel funny it feels like I’m in a response piece that is breaking the fourth wall and reminds me that I’m in reality watching or reading something instead of actually feeling like I’m in the story. It’s like pseudo-wittiness or something. Tell me if you guys feel this way about some modern tv shows or books, I can't be alone please 😭!!

The stupid toast scene at the end lol The book is like: Do you get it? Did you get it?? They’re opposites! And they attract!! We did the trope you guys!! Also, the stupid Darth Vader scene to start off the book 💀

This whole book made me cringe where I had to constantly get up walk around and lie on the floor before I could continue, only to constantly repeat the cycle 😅

Anyway, idk how to end this review/rant I just had such strong emotions I had to get out probably because I was so excited for this book to come out for like over a year and got back into PJO for a bit and read some of Mark Oshiro’s books and greek mythology and stuff, so I think it wasn’t just me reading any random bad book it disappointed me more that it was poor quality because I wanted to love it so much.

It did have some actually good parts, the troglodytes were cute … I can’t remember the other stuff but it was there I swear lol! If you enjoyed it I’m happy for you! Don’t let me ruin a book you like, you deserve to feel joy 😘💐

[asexual-society]

Hii hope you have a wonderful day today! -I wanted to ask something to make sure im not being mean but- is it possible for an Ace person to be Aphobic? Im in a fandom where there used to be a Ace character- he said he was- thing is, the show never said he was SexRepulsed- but fans took his lack of interest as such. believed he was in fact SexRepulsed. -that character is gone- now, there is yet another character (think, a reboot of the old one) believed to be Ace but this time, he seems to be ok with touch an even seems very friendly ~ with only one character. my ask is, if some people view this second version, as still Ace. but sex favorable, is that aphobic? is maybe having another view on this chracter that is questioning himself, a bad thing? because this is said a lot, that ppl is being aphobic for "refusing to accept he is sex repulsed" or "using the fact he is questioning himself to ship him" (mind you-most shipart is literally hand holding and being buddies) hope Im making sense- im so lost and I trust your blog to help me (because im also scared to be harrased for asking this inside that fandom)

Hey! (We got your other ask, I got half way through answering it and then forgot, so I will get to that soon I promise) Good to hear from you again :) I ended up going a little off topic here, but I hope I managed to fully answer this (if not, just send another one). Also get ready for some parentheses.

In answer to the first part of your question, yes ace people can be aphobic (many ace people can be arophobic, but also acephobic, both to people who share their own identity and others who have a different identity under the ace umbrella).

This is a pretty interesting question actually, because there is acephobia at play in the situation you're describing, but not necessarily in the way those people mean. It is NOT acephobic to have a sex favourable ace character, that's fine, because there are sex favourable aces out there and they're just as much a part of our community as those who are indifferent, averse, repulsed, or some sort of mixture. Sex favourable aces have just a much right to see themselves represented as sex averse aces, but unfortunately, there is so little asexual representation that it can feel like if one flavour of ace people are represented, that that representation has been taken away from aces of other flavours.

It's totally understandable to feel that way, but that doesn't mean those feelings are actually justified? And people get pretty negative reactions for complaining about any lack of rep, which can lead to bad feelings all round and just creates even more of a divide between us. We have to understand that our individual experiences not being represented is NOT the fault of other ace people. It's not fair to want one group to miss out on representation, just so another can get theirs. Additionally, it can be important for people who are questioning or struggling with their identity to work through that in their art, and explorations of things like touch aversion and touch starvation can be very nuanced because one person can experience both to very high degrees, and they each can even compound the other. And, a sex favourable asexual person will not feel the same way about sex as an allosexual person, and that is an equally nuanced and interesting (and fun) thing to be able to explore.

I don't know what media this ask is about, so I can't comment on specifics, but I can admit, I've been frustrated by this sort of thing in the past; it can be really hard to shake an instinct to push back when you feel like you're being treated unfairly, but sometimes we do have to step back and understand that everyone in our community feels the same way, we just want to see ourselves and to feel seen by others. As a person who is both aro and ace, and doesn't want to have sex or be in a romantic relationship, I don't feel represented by characters who are alloace in the way an alloace person does, or sex/romance favourable aroace characters in the way sex favourable aroace people do, but they probably feel that same way when they see aro characters or sex averse characters. It does really suck when people outside of the community ignore and erase the identities of aspec characters because they don't feel our experiences are interesting or valuable enough to represent and explore, but that isn't what's happening on an intracommunity level (as in, within the ace community).

The recent discourse about shipping aroace characters has sort of been getting me down, because it's a complex topic and rather than being a black-or-white, two sides thing, there are people with good and bad takes (mostly bad, let's be real) coming from so many different directions, there is so much nuance it would take me much more than one little answer to cover (and let me tell you, if I were to try, it would not be on this blog!). I might have said this before, but I tend to avoid fandoms of media with canon aroace characters for the most part for this exact reason, and within the community we are SO far ahead of where the rest of the world (and even the rest of the queer community) sees aspec people, I genuinely believe (call it cynical if you like) that this will continue to be a problem for several more years. And like, you can just block people and move on with your life, your fandom experience will be so much more enjoyable if you block people who say shit you think sucks, aphobic or not. Everyone should do this.

I think this is probably long enough now, and I've definitely missed something important, but I hope it helped.

~ mod key

[necrophiliak]

umm. bhaal thoughts nd stuff under the cut. ive seen a lot of stuff mischaracterising/interpreting/whatever and it bothers me. i like him.

bg1+2+3 spoilers btw.

i dont wanna seem uhhh. confrontational or anything so this is just me airing thoughts out cz its true u dont rly Hear from him much directly in bg3 so i guess i get why ppl wouldnt know or think certain stuff. and im not the worlds expert on the topic as much as id like to be. but writing gods in stuff is never easy i think, especially as a fan, since they function on totally different ideas and have worldviews we could never possibly understand, etc etc

i think what bothers me the most is the misconception that bhaal would give a shit what the urge does. he definitely doesnt. the canon bg1+2 is a human male goodguy (derogatory) and even he was still supposedly favoured by bhaal (in that achieving slayer form was from a feeling of 'divine hatred' and not an actual gift since bhaal at the time was dead and he was favoured not for this but in that he was the strongest of all his spawn (this is bg2 stuff btw i highly recommend u play both those games if u liked bg3 durge)) i actually miss how bg2 introduced that form its way better than in 3 but thats a big tangent ToT and i get why since the durge was quite literally made with it in mind anyway he didnt care about the prev spawn because their only purpose was to die anyway. but he doesnt care abt what durge does either. he would not care if he was fucking gortash. the one constant w him is that all he cares about is the end goals, the process doesnt matter at all. i cant be bothered putting screenshots in rn but both the durge's old diary and sarevok say "bhaal cares only for death. death in numbers, death in droves." and the ingame proof is in that even if u refuse to kill isobel u can still get the slayer form by agreeing to accept his gift in the temple. whether u killed isobel or not just determines if u get slayer form early. the other proof is orin, who doesnt follow him as he would ideally want either (too focused on making 'art' with death instead of actually killing) but still gets to be his chosen if u play as tav instead of durge (he also doesnt like the way shes loyal to sarevok more than him) hes pretty pragmatic

also the other thing... abt the butlers. sceleritas isnt there to ensure u are loyal, thats his own prerogative and pride as a butler. tho i think the specifics of him in general are left intentionally vague. the rest of bhaals butlers are always imps, and his own was also an imp (theyre made in his imps image after all), bt sceleritas is made in bhaals image. since he has a glued on nose and the colouring on his face looks like a skull. and the earrings are mirroring the slayers facial horns. thats a bit of a tangent tho umm anyway, my point is that durge got a very special butler for reasons we can only guess at. (tho i enjoy thinking that he really was meant more as a nanny/standin parent figure)

anyway that got sort of long. i love dad a lot. everyones durge can be different frm canon obviously... bt bhaal is an established char, nd a super interesting one (i have a lot of thoughts abt the similarities w mystra+shar especially cz of bg3 and the way sheart+gale narrative's play out bt again thats uhhhhh a HUGE tangent and im not even sure how to word my thoughts)

anyway tldr bhaal is a very hands off parent and doesnt give a shit what u do as long as u get the job done (and i love him very much 🥺)

oh also if u math the years out, durge is 20yrs old at max. and that takes the assumption that bhaal made u ASAP after he was resurrected. trivia. if u wanna read the thing wheree he gets rezzed, its the 'murder at baldurs gate' story which also comes with a rly intensive worldbuilding manual for the city which could help w fanfic or whatever u want. i enjoyed reading it (helping w dnd stuff T_T).

another edit: i doubt anyone except me is rly interested bt i have soooo much to say on the topic of how bhaal treats the urge (positively+unconditionally), sceleritas in general, and the way the urges journey mirrors bhaals own fall from grace and coming back stronger, etc etc, i already wrote half of it on twitter anyway so if theres interest i can share it here too

[steady-star]

argopro has my FUCKING number i'll tell you what. i was nervous about them getting new outfits but i am always a fool for not trusting them to do epsi right and more. this is my insanity post so i don't get rate limited on twitter

starting with this bastard. i cannot BELIEVE they went this route. the more i look at it the more there is. he's only got one leg out which is a shame, but i think the covered leg is a nice compromise to convey his slightly matured vibe without taking away the original appeal of shu's character design (leg).

the cropped tank top is insane to me, like i don't think it was ever confirmed that shu's og black shirt was a tank top (ppl started drawing it that way because yuki's live outfit was a tank top, though that's a fairly practical choice considering how sweaty the performers get) but now they've just gone all in and shrank the hell out of it and made sure we know from the get-go that he's got little slivers of shoulder there and a big enough opening in the jacket to expose them entirely if it were to be pulled aside. god bless. and the midriff?????? i just checked and i'm fairly certain the ONLY navel we have ever seen before this was futa's dbes initial 4 star where his shirt is just barely floating up enough to see it. and now it's a permanent fixture in this creature's outfit. insane. insane. i'm not even going to talk about the fucking harness and its positioning

the jacket is immensely perfect; it keeps the key appeal of his old jacket (big chunky sleeves) while trimming up all the unnecessary parts and adding a lot of stylish flair. the holo parts being slightly transparent is super cool!!! and, i'm sure, serves to highlight shu's figure even more 😭 it's crazy how he went from such a loose, bulky, covered top half design to this insane array of bare skin and contours. he's gained confidence!!! and it's hard to tell but i wonder if this jacket still has a hood on it... and my favorite aspect of his old jacket was the "CHECK" text on the sleeves, since i liked to change the word for narrative art purposes, so i wonder if this new jacket's sleeves will still have any words or if it's just the epsi logo that you can see part of on his left sleeve.

his top half is really so perfectly tailored to the way i've liked to exploit/alter shu's original outfit in my art that it's almost suspicious lol. argopro staff secretly follows me!?!? i'm glad they have the same taste at any rate

misc items:

i'm a big fan of the new choker; the dangling epsi logo charm is super cute and cool, i hope they make official merch out of it

i also LOVE those gloves. don't know how to explain how it fits the energy of the new epsi and shu specifically so perfectly

i'll miss his old boots but i won't miss how hard they were to draw LOL, these new shoes look fun!!

thank you for keeping the garters. it's part of his dna. the "reverse" white garter on his right thigh is extremely funny

all the details around and on his shorts are needlessly complex. see the pink lines on his shorts that lead up to the white belt and wrap around it? it becomes black on one side. for whatever reason. just the number of things overlapping the white belt infuriates me lol. the striped belt has the only yellow in his outfit on its inner side and i wish he had more elsewhere. the holo belt... structure(?) with the epsi logo plastered all over is going to be hell and a half to draw. i am probably going to simplify this whole area when i draw it myself lol

the way his shorts are blue-black while the rest are neutral-black kinda bothers me 😭 maybe if they were more of a dark blue (a lighter shade than his other blacks) it might be better.... they're really going for the jrpg chara style of blacks-on-blacks and a million belts huh

THAT WAS A LOT OF COMPLAINTS BUT it all balances out

overall: very cute, very cool, surprisingly handsome, kind of slutty. i support him

skipping to reiji because i have priorities and he is the second member of epsi to ME. and to the dbes file data.

i was initially very surprised with this long coat thing with the segmented coattails(? if they should be called that), as i'm too used to seeing him in his trimmed and slender suit or school uniform... but he does wear long coats/other draping things in his dbes oufits (in the rain and yume no ato come to mind), so it's not out of character! the bright yellow on the inside and the squared sections seemed really familiar to me, and when i asked my brother he was like "isn't it like zhongli?" AND HE'S RIGHT... and it just so happens that zhongli is my favorite genshin character design, largely because of his cool coat, so argopro really did reach into my brain and made something nice for me. it also makes me think of penguins somehow.

most insane piece of this design is easily the chest harness made to look like a tie. whose fucking idea was that. it's so clever and ridiculous at the same time. most importantly it's still just as if not more yankable than his original tie, so shu will have an easier time than ever pulling reiji down to his eye level 🥰 i also like to pretend reiji has nice tits and this harness will help accentuate that if i shorten it up a little.

love the whore gloves. i used to hate these when they started showing up in a million character designs in other franchises but i understand their appeal now and i wholly approve of inflicting them upon reiji. black gloves in general really suit him, they're very cool and have an air of danger. i've also just read a tweet wondering if reiji's got black nail polish under his gloves like tadaomi and i'm super fine & normal with that thought. notably, shu and reiji are the only ones with gloves in this new set!

this is the most insane thing to be insane about but we have once again been denied the skin of reiji's left elbow. listen. we've never seen it. his sakura 3 star trained has his right elbow out. "the 3d outfit," you say. THE SLEEVES GOT ROLLED DOWN IN THE 3D OUTFIT! one time in puchi he rolled up his sleeve past the elbow.... only on the right arm. there's been a number of reiji chibi merch with tshirts but that elbow is always angled away. again and again his left elbow has never been seen in its full extent and this new outfit is the most hilarious iteration of hiding it because his right sleeve has the semi-translucent holo material, giving us screened access to his right elbow, BUT NOT HIS LEFT! regular dark opaque imprisoning fabric there. when i first noticed this phenomenon i joked he might have a scar or something that he prefers not to expose and the evidence only grows that he's hiding something there. just know that if we ever see that stupid elbow in full (and it's surely just a normal elbow) i'm going to get a little crazy on twitter for a bit

misc items:

his eyebrows have a steeper slant than they used to, especially for a fairly neutral expression! it makes him look a bit more like his support drummer, kitamura-san.

i like the coat lapels to preserve some of his suit aesthetic, and the white borders call to mind his handsome uniform blazer. so glad they're standard lapels and not notched or something, i'm not a huge fan of those

he's still got his stupid white dress shirt. good for him. it's going to get ruined but good for him

i am perplexed and very interested by the torn knee. this might be the first time we've even seen reiji's knee (do you like how i keep track of which swaths of reiji's skin we have been privy to) but i'm mostly surprised he'd wear something like that, considering he usually keeps such a refined image. guess he's loosening up a bit and embracing his cooler/rougher side!? thanks to shu i assume... :)

i'll miss his formal shoes but i think the style of these boots are a fairly good compromise in preserving his vibe while also fitting the new epsi aesthetic. they feel fantasy-like somehow. i am in fact dabbling with a medieval fantasy au so i'm glad some of the work's been done for me LOL

the holo-material bracelet on his raised hand is floating of its own accord. it must be minecraft enchanted.... the color even matches

one again reiji's terrible color palette bites him again because he looks incredibly clunky next to his more cohesively colored bandmates. it's the fact that he's got his very dark hair (compared to the rest of epsi) in a unique hue, then his cherry red eyes, then the purpleish holo material and epsi-pink accents, THEN the brightass yellow of his coattails. it's a lot of colors in one design relative to his bandmates. still questioning why he has the worst image color in argopro

there's a lot of miscellaneous detailing on his outfit that i don't really care for and were probably added just to make sure his design had the same density as the others, which is a shame since the others' designs more effortlessly include detail as part of the structure of their outfits (e.g. shu's shirt, harness, and jacket layering together) whereas reiji just has a bunch of accessories tacked on. i wonder if i can fix him

only shu and reiji have matching purplish holo material. what's up with that huh!!!!

overall: good enough! his harness, gloves, and coattails are the highlights for me. the potential of those alone make the drawbacks more negligible

ok back to band order

jacket is Cool As Fuck. great collar and overall silhouette, especially with his pose. i could do without the holo sleeve though, i wish it at least had a wide cuff. would be a nice callback to his og jacket

i want to know everything about his black top. there are clearly cuts at the shoulders but he still has sleeves. are they shoulder cutouts. are the sleeves arm warmers. are they attached to the inside of the jacket. all i can conclude is that the cuts combined with the high fitted collar and his visible collarbones is incredibly sexy. bonus points for that X-shaped thing and the belt, just to accentuate that area even more

he accessorizes yellow much better than the previous two, and the white gradients are a curious touch. gives the yellow less of the "⚠ caution" feeling of his old outfit and leans more towards it just being an eye-catching secondary color

his bottom half feels like a different design LOL. the shoes are kind of an eyesore with how much patterning and detail they have

his guitar is still so hideous and its proportions look even worse somehow. AND IT DOESN'T EVEN MATCH HIS OUTFIT

overall: ok! i think i am looking almost exclusively at his collar area down to his pick hand

CUTE. CUTE CUTE CUTE. this might be the strongest design of the bunch. everything actually matches.

bigass collar: GOOD. his jacket's sleeve situation is a mirror image of haruka's: GOOD. the green perfectly matches his bass's pickguard: GOOD. very successful jacket. again don't like the holo sleeve but i think with both him and haruka i'd like it more if they were a) the same purple holo as shu and reiji or b) just rendered differently. maybe i'll like it better in card art or something

love the wide-necked shirt, that was always his thing. i think the stripes on the lower half are odd somehow, i feel like they should be diagonal instead of horizontal... maybe it's because of it being right next to his spotted bass

his pants are an absolute success in matching his outfit and calling back to his original design

very good yellow accessorizing and i think he pulls it off best because of his pants + his green matching it very well

unfortunate shoe situation again but it's slightly less bad here. also both haruka and kanata have their instrument role + their names printed on the shoes which is funny

overall: chef's kiss. an excellent composition of his old aesthetic with new epsi

somehow manages to fit within the aesthetic perfectly fine while also looking out of place. as expected of tadaomi

all around very solid jacket! i like the holo sleeve windows; you can see where his shirt's sleeves end on his biceps. kinda cute + hot. curiously he's got more sleeve on his left arm so there's another haruka situation here

HIS PAINTED NAILS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! his og design's rings and this design's nails do a good show of highlighting his pianist hands, especially in the absence of his instrument in the visual

the holo strip thing coming off his collar is kinda like a tie lol? so he gets that little splash of formality, or perhaps something vaguely reminiscent of his "prince" image....

i'm curious about those white belts forming a V.... where do they go.... they look nice tho

i wish his shirt was slim fitting like haruka and shu 😔😔😔

his pants and shoes are very pleasing in their detail distribution. nijos take notes

i really like the diagonal striped pattern on the cuffs of his boots; this pattern also appears on other epsi members and brings back that sort of "⚠ caution" feeling i mentioned earlier, since it's like yellow warning tape/signs/etc

it's a shame the beautiful french grey of his hair sticks out so much with epsi's unnatural color palette

very notably, tadaomi doesn't have an ounce of yellow in his outfit. which should mean something or other. probably

i'm really trying to find something to elaborate on and i think that in itself makes a point about how oddly inconspicuous his outfit is

overall: enigmatic but attractive. exactly as he should be

so that's everything for now!! i didn't say everything i could have said but i have said Enough. in the end i'm pretty pleased with these designs even though the original ones will always hold an immutable place in my heart. i hope we get to see more angles of them for drawing reference soon

[teddybeartoji]

thinking about

https://x.com/OwwlllY/status/1803550523322507308?t=GeVDL_ljw1j1W0sNVc0aXg&s=19

(love this artist and their lil comics w satosugu they're so!!!)

it's a recurring thing w me but i just love like. horny, down bad people. "slutty" things. or suggestive. sometimes people just exist and it's so hot to me for some random reason like the type of skirt worn or certain movements... or the voice, the tone man idk i just 🫠

okay so i was thinking about this and also how would i imagine different jjk characters dealing with someone with super high libido, a dirty mind and a super sensitive body? i can imagine some taking advantage of it and teasing a lot (suguru)

but really imagine it's like the highest amount anyone could be. like full on succubus level. 24/7. would some characters tap out? i read a toji headcanon where he, bc of his age, didn't have as much energy but still had fun hearing reader pleasure themselves in the room next door before coming to cuddle next to him

often in fics it's expected that the libidos match so i'm rlly wondering how a difference could change things around 🤔 how they/you would adapt to it in order to keep everyone happyyyyy

so yeah ig i'm wondering what your opinion would be :3333

take care as always,

~ ☀️

HAIII HAIII SUNNYYY MY DEAREST!!!!!!!!!!!!

I LOVE OWWLLLYYYYY!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THEIR ART SMM (HERE'S THE LINK BTW)!!!!!!!!! and aaahhh i totally get what you mean by kind of getting turned on by the smallest things - i genuinely love smiles so much those also make me horny lmao, i really love back muscles, i love when people are sweaty!!!!!!! like oh myfukcing god if i saw toji or satoru or suguru working out in front of me.... i am FROTHINGGGG AT THE MOUTH OKAY i will lunge at them!!!!!!!!!!

i absolutely agree that suguru would definitely use that to his own advantage, he is very very patient and he knows how to keep his own please back a little just so he could last longer for you yk? but i do think that satoru the puppy would love it!!! he can get so hyper during sex and his stamina is just fucking godddlyyy i think he could keep up with you really well. aaand i do think that he can be a bit of a horn dog, like the smallest things do it for him too - short shorts, you brushing your teeth, your messy hair, you cooking for him, you bending over to pick smth up - everything goes!!!!! but it's just bc he really fucking loves u ok, it's not his fault you're so sexyy!!!!!!!!!!!!

ahh i know exactly what toji piece you're talking abt i loved it a lot!!!! and i agree with that too - while he does have good stamine and he fucks you so good, he's not as horny overall like satoru is yk? sure he thinks that you doing the most domestic things are hot but that mostly gets his heart racing for Love reasons lmao i love sappy old man toji ok he means so much to me. i also think that kento is gonna have a bit of a problem keeping up with you too. i don't know he just doesn't strike me as an overly sexual guy, he'd just love to relax with you in some other way. don't get me wrong though, he also fucks you so fucking well and he makes you cum plently of times but he just won't wanna go for like hours on hours on hours on hours. kento and toji are also both men that will put their own needs and desires on hold and focus on you!!!!!!!!!!

so yeah the ppl with the highest libidos in my opinion are suguru and satoru (though i don't think this is a surprise lma) aand the one's with the lowest are in fact toji and kento and hiromi (the working men😭😭). actually wait i feel like shoko is on the lower end as well. she's just working all the time and yes while sex is a good way to relieve stress it's also just fucking exhausting lmao she just wants to take a bath with you and have a glass of wine. aaaaaand man i kinda wanna say that sukuna is also here... idk that might just be me but yeah king or not i feel like he has other stuff to do and he's not always thinking abt sex. i feel like he's the most likely to let you suck him off whenever you feel like it though,, i think he's really into cockwarming too.

but i do feel like all of the ppl on the lower sex drive side on the scale feel more than comfortable with you taking care of yourself when they're ready to tap out (ok kuna might try to act a lil pouty tbh but he doesn't really mean it)(he feels a bit old so u just gotta reassure him a litttle lmao) buuut yeah these are just some of my thoughts heheee i love them all sm!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[nfumbewalk]

So Trite & Contrary

I am one. The Magician, the first card in the tarot. An important card, for me, especially. I lost myself in high & mighty Ifá studies and forgot my core. Magic! And always, always necromancy & necrosophy. I was told to stay away from necromancy by a higher power and it fuckin felt wrong to me. Nobody tells me not to work with my muertos. My muerto was suspicious of the ATR'S.

Rodolfo wasn't very happy when he learned I was cutting down my time with him & the other muertos. Rodolfo is very special to me. My first successful extraction from the graveyard, into my Record Keeping quartz, then into my vessel. It was called a "spirit pot" and I wrote the book on those...years ago. I lost my muerto when I disassembled my pot about 12 years ago. Two years ago, my friend Angel told me how to get Rodolfo back & into a vessel - this time a old, decorated tequila bottle. Got the right herbs, bones, and a certain type of pact - worked like a charm!

Rodolfo died at 35 years old. He was in a motorcycle club known as the Free Souls. They are a 1%'er, outlaw MC that originate here in Eugene, Ore. He is Latino and proud of it, he prefers terms like Hispanic, Latino, or Mexican. I asked him about the new "Latinx" terminology after explaining it to him. He laughed at this, very jovial at first and then a sinister snicker. He said, "What bullshit, man. Don't fuckin say it cos like, what's the X stand for? Experimental? Fuckin dopes." He is old school, a bit biased about other races but not racist.

I have a photo of his grave. He does have a difficult last name to pronounce. He is a Taurus. I usually don't get along with Taurus folks. Hmm!

I'm sure ppl may not believe me & the shit I talk about. That's fine, but I'm not a liar, nor do I write fiction. Not a fan of fiction anyway. I'm also not afraid to stand up for what I do & stand for. Basically, I'm no shit talker. Everything I do is real & it works for me & others I've taught. I've got 32 years of magic experience and I was born a necromancer. It was written in my stars (astrology). I can see it in anyone's astrological chart. It's all placements. Saturn, outer planets, and houses. Yes, you can still be a necromancer if it's not in your astrological chart, but it's quite a bit harder. I recently had a client with a perfect chart. Just couldn't teach her because her personality didn't go with mine. I'm not a fast teacher & I don't hand out participation trophies. Lessons & tests require field trips to graveyards frequently. Necromancy & necrosophy does not require lots of reading books, but it does require WORK.

Teaching is open, but I've already posted the class fee. Not cheap. It's not only documents that you get. I also send many things for the class that I do not sell. Oils, incenses, polvos (powders), special concoctions - like my Wallbreaker brew. That's a very potent mixture that breaks down blockages in your life. I only *give* this stuff away, or if I do sell it, it's at $35 for 1/2 ounce. It's gold, baby. Pure gold. Yes, it does work that well. Many clients still look for it. The only bottle I have is the LAST bottle. I can make it again but it takes about 5 years. A special root is mixed with a Spanish leaf in grain alcohol and must steep for at least five years. The odor is interesting, sort of like leather and booze and it's brown in color.

I also have a checkered reputation. Ppl don't care for me. I'm sure you can tell. I'm a facetious bitch but I'm very patient, giving, and fair. And I'm a good necromancy & necrosophy instructor. The students I've had are satisfied though one had to go fully back to her mom duties. Another student excelled so much, she didn't need the rest of my teachings, but she's welcome back anytime she wants. Other students graduated and moved on to be successful Necro-Workers.

We are few & far between, but those of us who work the Necro Arts are honest, capable people. We're the little folks in the shadows that pray to elevate the souls of muertos, comfort them when they're in anguish, feed them with water & light & food too. Necromancy & necrosophy aren't about asking the muertos random questions and being **spooky** on Halloween. Woooo!

**This field should be respected but I don't expect it.** Those who really work with muertos don't ask for people's regard, opinions OR help. We realize that most ppl *DO NOT* care about the dead (yes, dead) - just bury & forget, right?

I'm done. Hope someone gets something out of this ramble. Don't go round thinking I have this huge ego, cos I don't. It's average.

Memento Mori!

Oluwa (Jen) 💖💀💖

Photo: This is from a reading I did with the Santa Muerte Tarot.

[weaselbeaselpants]

Not a Receipt-post. Just venting cuz it's twice now I've gotten this really accusatory ask, again:

Q: "Why do you 'HATE' Vivziepop??"

Short answer: I don't hate her. I hate how her fans can NOT take criticism,

because -> they have 0 boundaries with Viv -> whenever someone does criticize the shows in any way, they (the fans) -> embarrass you in front of the Spindlecrew who -> have no reason NOT to take the fan's word on how 'awful' you are, and so -> inadvertently ignore/condone your harassment.

Long answer:

I don’t know Viv and I never have.

I watched her YEARS ago back on deviantART when she was Vivzmind. I really loved her art and I still do. The few times I ever interacted with Viv, when I commented on her shizz, I remember her being fun, casual, and nice. True, maybe I don't know the "real her", whoever that is, but I have few if any qualms with Viv on a personal level. Judging every single artist who makes creative decisions you disagree with by John K standards is fucking hyperbole. I don't hate her.

What I HAVE always hated, and the thing that eventually drove me to quietly stop following Viv in 2013, are her fans....

we really need to start talking about them, okay?

~~~~Part 1 ~~~~~~ my experience, the Vivziepop standom THEN

There were two kinds of Vivzmind groupies back in the day, 1) the majority, aka ppl like me, and 2) this one very specific kind of Vivz-stan. While the basic majority of fans (me) were as lovebombing and prone to hype as anyone would be about the artist they admire, the people who were REALLY rabid for Viv's attention (stans) felt possessive. They felt hostile. Like, imagine you say outloud that you like the popular kid at school cuz everyone does and there'd be a weird false friend of theirs listening in, constantly @ing you with "yeah, well I like her MORE" or coming to their defense on perceived slights against her. I'm sure a lot of it was based in just social ineptitude and not anything too serious, but again it was beyond what was usual for popular DA artists.

When people say “Viv can not take criticism”, what they really mean is these fans could not take criticism.

I know all I have to go on is heresay given that much of her gallery and old work is gone but here's what I remember:

>>If you were a newbie follower and you accidentally did something Viv vocally didn't like, you'd pay for it. If you were like me and said once Viv’s art reminded you of neopets, Viv herself would say nothing but these fans would tear you to shreds for daring to not know Viv’s comfort zone. >>If you were asking for context on what was happening in one of her pics with characters you didn’t know, fans would inform you in a passive aggressive manner. "HOW DARE you not remember! Viv posted it, ugh yer so annoying, Felicia"

>> One thing Viv def did not like was people “stealing” her artstyle - not tracing or using her art w/o permission, just very clearly being inspired by her in making their own characters or pictures. She hated that. I get how, when you’re JUST a popular artist on the site it can seem annoying, like someone’s Patrick-Star-ing your every move while acting like they don’t know you...that's rough, trust me, but it’s STILL not the same as art theft-! Even so, Viv complained and would post journals about artists “stealing” her style. One time she happened to do this to an artist I did art trades with. Because of Viv's 'endorsement', he left dA forever. His profile was bombarded by passive-aggressive to just straight up mean Vivstans dogpiling him about how he "needed to give Viv credit". One of the few times I talked to Viv it was to say "hey I know you’re mad, but this guy’s kind of my friend", to which she said to me "tell you friend that it’s wrong and not okay to do this." So I did. He told me he more than knew by that point and was off the site within the week. This was long before I just fell out of interest and stopped watching her, but it always left a bad taste in my mouth that I did that. That's the thing: there's no big-style discourse, just a lot of little microaggressions that'd build up and wear you down.

Ppl often characterize "white knights" as being directed by their beloved artist to do the deed, but, as far as I know, Viv has never been the "DEFEND MY HONOR"-type. Viv never seemed to talk to these uber fans AT ALL; she was far more abt chit chatting with her friends and casual viewers. The vibe I always got wasn’t that Viv weaponized her worst fans’ behavior, it’s that she ignored them and also ignored how they may have hurt the rest of us. On paper nothing about Viv saying “ya’ll, I’m tired of these specific comments abt my work; copycats; non criticisms being dished,” is wrong. It’s that her underground stan-base would be the ones to pounce on you for it, for whatever reason I don't know. Maybe it was some kind of bid for Viv’s approval or maybe it was just cuz they felt better doing it; THAT is what you feared. So, when Viv did the bare minimum of get peeved at someone or something, it was a circumstance that meant nothing if it’d happen to any other artist but it would hurt because there was her initial judgment, and then there was her followers' judgment. This is important because while I think this exact attitude/relationship has changed, like hell do I think it’s gotten better...

~~~Part 2~~~The Spindlehorse chain of command, aka Vivziepop now

Now that Viv's the auteur creator of a beloved Indie series, I fully believe Viv's base has matured into a DIFFERENT breed of toxic. I’m always stressing this because it couldn’t be stressed enough: Hazbin Hotel is a preemptive fandom: It was made with the help of numerous internet famous animators collabing with an already devotedly popular creator at the helm; it was promised and hyped and kept up as a fandom before there was ever even a product (the pilot) out, and way before it was properly picked up in 2020; because so many internet people were working on it, it was a darling to many the animation/art scene on youtube+ people had a deep attachment to it; the fans have almost direct access/ability to talk to the showrunners directly and vice/versa, so the fans feel very ‘in’ on the show in a way other budding cartoon fandoms couldn’t really say. All these elements mean that Hazbin+Helluva are made with a great deal of love, devotion, and earnestness to them. It’s a very passionate, very close-knit community and just so we're clear, there's nothing wrong with that.

It just also means that the creator and the fans do not have great boundaries with each other and I think may be a little blindsided by the joy of creation. Where back in the day the 'old verse-same-as-the-first' would be Viv'd have a tiff w someone and that someone w be bombarded by basement stans, now there’s a different kind of vicious circle at play:

when the HH/HB fan communities hear rumors of “a critic” or “a bully” (usually just negative reviews /redesigns/fan theories that contradict what the creator wants) there’s a real threat of that 'critique' working it’s way up the chain of command TO the creators themselves. And by 'critique', I mean the real words and intent being taken out of context or twisted to fit the stans' pov. (ex: "Stolitz is a bad ship and Stella is a wasted villain" get's telephoned into "I hate that these characters are gay; I want Stolas to go back to his abuser")

The creators have no incentive of their own to comment on this bs. They're busy. BUT, because they are just as much the makers of as they are fans of their own show they feel the need to comment on any controversy they hear because they don’t want things getting out of hand. On paper, understandable; But in practice-

-the Spindlehorse crew don’t really know the context of the situation. They take it on good faith that their fans aren’t misrepresenting things to them, to which they then say nothing to stop people from being harassed, OR-

-they casually dish out their own comments in response to a situation they’re not actually a part of.

In 2018 Frootrollup1, a then-underage fan, drew redesigns of the cast of Hazbin because she draws redesigned versions of all of her fandoms → some fans saw her art as mocking/attacking Viv because assholes have done their own redesigns of Hazbin to spite Viv in the past → these same fans took their complaints to Twitter where a bunch of people, including Viv, all dunked on Frootrollup for being another “hater”...and only backed off when they learned her age and that it wasn’t a pic drawn in spite. "Oops." Frootrollup WAS a fan of Hazbin. She’s not anymore because people took her art out of context, had their own kneejerk reactions to it, and embarrassed her in front of the creator directly, who took these people’s sides. This isn’t an isolated incident and it keeps happening because the crew doesn’t discourage fans from reacting or asking for their input on crap that shouldn’t involve them. 

“Lots of fanbases have shitty fans” is not the point here. Hazbin/Helluva are a unique case. Yes all fandoms kinda suck, technically, and any case where you have the creators reacting to fans is gonna get parasocial. My point is that Spindlehorse is waaay to accustomed to their fandom as fans themselves and not outside viewers.

Remember back in 2015, when that one Steven Universe fan was being bombarded for her problematic art when it was really just a glorified hate campaign by some of her ex friends wanting to bad mouth her to the fandom?; and then IT WORKED? Imagine now that one of the people running the hate campaign on her had taken the 'evidence' to the Crewniverse directly, and Rebecca Sugar herself was like “wow, what a bigot!”- adding to the dogpile of hate that almost got that fanartist to kill herself??? Scary hypothetical, I know, but that's what scares me about this. If that isn’t already happening already, with a bunch of critical fans and redesign-artists going silent out of fear of the Vivbase, then it’s at a real threat of becoming a reality. 

-----brief aside, we gotta mention Tapatalk and why they're awful and you shouldn't dismiss them/accidentally condone them----

Complicating matters more is the BadWebcomicsWiki. While not KiwiFarms or 4chan, the wiki forums had the same problem of being made exclusively for bitching and moaning at webcomics ppl didn’t like (many of which were bad, but it's just as likely that should a webcomic DARE to be liberal or furry or lgbt themed it was suspiciously torn apart by people all too eager to note said things..). That is what the wiki and forum were made for. That is what they were always made for. Do not @ me abt how it was 'good once' or people had good intentions and didn't wanna use it for hate. I know, I'm getting to that ->

In 2015 When Zoophobia got a thread and later an article there, a bunch of randos from outside joined the forums simply because it was one of the first and only times where former Viv fans could congregate + explain all the details to the newbies+ talk about the bullying and microaggressions Viv’s base did that hurt them and how she did nothing to stop it; i.e. people started to use the shittybitch forums for genuine talk about the comic and criticism.

((never had, nor do I want a BWW account, but I used to check in every day back in 2015 for updates on one webcomic I hated before wising up and realizing the site was run by centrist chudheads. This is how I found out abt the Zoophobia discourse at the time))

The problem being that, when you go to a forum for any kind of dissenting opinion to be made, ANY KIND of dissenting opinion WILL BE made. It doesn’t matter if some ppl meant nothing wrong and just wanted a place to shoot the shit about how bad Viv’s stans were. A "bad-media-is-bad-lemme hate on it cuz I'm cool"-based wikiANYTHING is going to lead to truly bad behavior. That moment came for the ZPBWW forums when one user showed up posting graphic art of Angel Dust raping Viv’s severed head as a joke. If I remember right, and it's prolly still on their forum now, other users on the forum were mad that he did that, but it doesn't really matter. Viv HAD/HAS ALL the right to disassociate w that forum regardless of what, how, or why anyone else used it for. That’s what you do when your understanding of a website is-“oh, that place where people hate on every little thing I do including the guy who mailed me art of myself getting raped?”. And that’s before we even get to LincarRox/theToyTaker drama and how he scoured the BWW forums once he was kicked off the normal Hazbin fan scene for stalking/harassing Viv. 

The Vivstans know this harassment against her exists. They don’t understand the real depth of it, but they know it’s there. What they do is use that harassment’s existence to justify their own dogpiling. 

The most egregious part is, given how big the Spindlehorse fandom is, it’s not very hard at all for other fans- big name or indie creators, to be misinformed and believe only the stans’ versions of events without question → which adds even more stigma because if in this ‘cancel/DNI’-obssessed microculture we got on Twitter and Tumblr. People aren’t questioning or really knowing the situation any more than Viv does. Except, these people are just fans, not the showrunners, and should be more open to hearing (legit) criticism. They’re not and that’s leading to a lot of the regular fanbase to I think develop tunnel-vision. As an outsider, I can't tell you for sure if any of Erin Frost's claims are 'valid' or legit. The most upsetting thing by far though is HOW FAST people were to call her a liar or act like her complaints at Spindlehorse are "nothing".

tl;dr I think two truths currently coexisting at the moment are

Viv has been harassed and treated horribly by people saying they’re “just being critical”. I 110% believe this woman when she says she ‘hates creeps’. I've seen first hand some of those creeps. I don't envy her.

Viv and the Spindlehorse crew have terrible boundaries and foresight into their fandom’s innerworkings and should NOT be commenting on them- because they exacerbate the issues within.

Viv’s base in uniquely unhealthy and overprotective. From the stanbase on the fringe, to the excitable but vulnerable fans that make up the whole, to the creators themselves who aren’t equipped to micromanage or even just manage all this drama. I see a bubble of pent up aggression seeping under the surface of the Helluva/Hazbinverse fanbase and I’m really scared when it pops. 

I have no idea what’s actually going on with the Spindlehorse folks or what’s in their hearts. I’m not interested in rumors, and I’m SO not interested in stupid petty AntiHazbin shit that perpetuates the hateflow (PK Russel, BWW, DaftPina I'm lookin at yoooo). I want to be a fan of Helluva and be excited for Hazbin. I want to take part in all this seeing as I did follow Viv and still do like her art and her general attitude about animation. It’s always cool when someone you followed casually makes it big- you want to support them! But, I’m also just naturally skeptical and sardonic and critical of things I like. So I’m in constant fear that overprotective stans are going to take my words and embarrass me in front of Viv and crew. And that? That WILL def make me hate Hazbin. No, still not enough to join your weirdo AntiHazbinnie tags or stalker threads, but it WILL make me hate it.

I don’t want that, none of you fans want that, and I know the creators don’t want that to be happening on a mass scale with people who're just skeptical of their show.

In comparing Helluvaverse to any other animated show's online fandom, there's no one to one, but consider how rabid and anticritical Steven Universe was- consider how dismissive and gatekeepy the Rick & Morty fandom is, consider how inconsiderate of creator's boundaries the Bronies were. Hazbin isn't out yet and if Helluva goes for all long as Viv and Brandon intend, it's also in it's infancy. We all have an opportunity to fix these problems before it begins- I say we do our part.

[ubike-official]

hello everynyan, i've been spending the post wisdom teeth removal process (i'm doing fine, very minimal pain) doing a lot of art and i came to a realization abt the way i've done art for my life that i posted a bit abt on my ig but abridged to hell and back bc yk instagram. but yeah, i've always had a very messy art style. lots of paint splatters and running ink splots and collage. I never did anything clean or in one medium only. I had a very disordered and messy style which often fit the theme of the piece as a lot of my trauma was represented in my art. and now i'm doing like a pop color esque portrait of my dog and I think it's the cleanest piece I've done in a very long time for a personal piece. I had "clean" pieces i made for projects that had to be clean, but not many things i made for me. and, it's very interesting. bc like, i honestly think I used to have that messy art style because I was afraid. Like the style I had was also cool as hell and I really like it still. but another layer of it was I was too scared to commit to doing something realistic, clean, and defined and it looked bad. Bc if it's messy and bad, it's almost part of the style. but with clean, highly technical work, there is no room for error. If it's off then it really looks off and needs to be corrected. And I never liked that. i never had the patience. I wanted my art to be a cathartic, messy, one take release of feelings. I never wanted to have to actually focus on skill and that's not wrong. there is nothing wrong with that if that's what art is for you. but for me, i wanted a certain level of technique and skill that i never really had the guts to commit to. and I saw other try to do that while having less talent than me, and i never got it. my ex was like that. It's mean but i did always think my art was better than his while we were in hs. It kinda made me question why he tried so hard to be good at art when he art wasn't bad but was always missing something. It was missing some sort of spark, and I saw him trying to find it and was like, why? Which again, was mean. I was very wrong for that and was honestly just bitter bc i didn't have that sort of work ethic. (but like i was a traumatized 17 year old with little going for me. like it made sense. )This is bc i did always had a raw talent for art and i feel like a lot of ppl could see that that. He always came to me for color mixing and a bunch of things, like line or design. Like i knew that i could more effortlessly pull of certain things from young. I'm actually not sure how much was talent but rather i spent more time thinking abt art than my peers. But as I got older and ego became mixed in, art felt like something only I and a handful of other sad weird kids could have. It felt wrong to see people try and improve when it felt like their lives were normal. which was so wrong and short sighted of me, but i felt it. It came from a very hurt, insecure place and I am over that now. but it was true, that's how i felt. and it was wrong. And now that i can look back on my past self and her body of work, I think i can appreciate what she did and how far she came and now i can create art from an empowered place. now i can dare to do what i hesitated from due to fear of failure. to fear that all i had wasn't good enough. and its liberating bc now i can create to truly create and that's wonderful. I'm still not fully there yet. Like, there is a lot more I want to do and routines i need to create and mental blocks to overcome before i'm really back in my creative flow like i was when i had more time on my hands. but yea, it's nice, it feels really nice. Like looking back and seeing how far i've come. so yeah. just wanted to share. love you all and hope you all are in a good place in your creative journey's or are on the way there. peace .

[blitzkennedyrieg]

Hi! so i realised your very very underrated, no offense..

So, as a person who gets somewhat noticed, i will give you some tips.

#Hashtags jesus Christ they are important

A hashtag is something im sure all tumblr users or just most ppl on social media are.. they help connect people with things they enjoy and like, which brings more attention to posts. I realised you dont do much or any at all Hashtag(s) and unfortunately you kinda need to. Maybe about 20-30, i know that sounds like a lot but its relatively easy to make a hashtag. Put what your post is about in many many forms of saying it, and no you cant do the same hashtag, it doesn't work. But just say it in different ways multiple times. anything can be made into a hashtag and you'll see everything you make below. Just click then 20-30 more later. You'll probably get the attention you deserve.

when answering asks i notice a lot of people just put #Asks or #Ask as the only hashtag when answering someones ask..But..That probably wont work, just hashtag a lot about what its about, or what the person asked about instead of just putting #Ask or #Example name Asked..which also wont work if you're not remotely popular

Also, when it comes to oc's you might have to realize you probably wont get much attention. people are more interested in something they already know everything about, like pennywise..sorta. Im a pennywise fan, so my work about him gets popular, because it has a fandom, or spy, he has a fandom too! So there are more people to interact with it because they know about it, more than just and oc only you might know about.

I also wanna say it takes a little bit of time, and i see you are taking a little bit of time. So, i apologize if this was like, idk forcing? I would just like to see your art get more recommended or recognised because your art is absolutely amazing dude. Keep it going man!

(also i love both the pennywise(s) and spy art<33)

hello anon! thank you for the tips and compliments i actually appreciate them a lot <3 but the reason i don't really tag my posts is because i've been on tumblr for like 2+ years i think and my days of trying to become a recognised popular artist are kinda in the past

i think i deleted all my old posts but if they were still up you'd be able to tell i was trying to get seen because i did add like a bajillion tags. there was a point where i stopped adding as many tags because i was content with the like 5 people looking at my posts

i appreciate the attention i get with the tags i do add but most of the time i just tag my stuff for blog organisation purposes. especially when it comes to my like OCs and stuff i just tag them with their story name. it's mainly just for my mutuals and friends to see and if anyone else happens to be interested while looking through my blog then that's a plus

but thank you nonetheless :^)

[sukifoof]

(this is my main lol my other acc is @princeyralsei) I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT I ABSOLUTELY LOVE HOW U INTERPRET FLOWEY/AZZY like so many utdr fans dont get him at all and it's so hard to find ppl to talk ab him with i just love him sm!

idk if u associate him with this but I like to compare his trauma to dissociative disorders, since his journey with feeling numb really helped me come to terms with my experiences with something similar. Maybe deltarune azzy just has a dissociative disordee this time instead of being a flower XD. Ofc the situations are VERY DIFFERENT LOL but yeah.

I love his and papyrus' friendship too bc i relate to papy a lot and very much want to form a fan club for Flowey too 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Anyway those are my thoughts I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR MORE OF UR HEADCANONS AB HIM. AND UR ART IS AWESOME!!

THANK U!!! i feel like i also really struggle to find other people who interpret him the way i do so i am always so pleased when someone agrees with my many paragraphs of analysis on him <3 i think dissociative disorders make a LOT of sense for flowey!! i always like to see other people who have been able to come to terms with their Various Struggles thanks to flowey cuz. Me Too Man. i've had Extremely Similar Experiences to flowey when it comes to our type of trauma and the ptsd that comes with it and it's really touching to see a character like flowey handle what exactly that kind of loss and the aftermath feels like. like yeah man flowey u get it. which i think is probably why i analyze him so much i look at him and the spiderman meme pops up in my head we point at each other and go SAME TRAUMA??? hes a very special character to me i love him dearly

ALSO THANK U!! i love talking about flowey so much.... one of my hcs is that the only person hes Like That (extra edgy and dramatic) around is frisk cuz theyve already seen him when hes. Having A Moment. but i also like to think papyrus is the only person he really feels calm around cuz hes. u know. papyrus. while with frisk i imagine he doesnt really wanna reopen old issues so hes just their weird edgy older brother who sits at home all day. "just let frisk live their life" yeah thats frisks loser brother who WILL throw rocks directly at ur face if ur mean to them cuz only HES allowed to bully them. i also think he probably tries very hard to stay away from his parents cuz he doesn't know how to go about That issue... but i think one day he'll finally be able to open up and maybe calm down a bit. and yet he still tries to kinda... take care of things Behind The Scenes like making sure asgores plants dont die if he forgot to water them or making sure toriel is taking care of herself. i think about him a lot

ALSO!!! i have been thinking about an au where he comes back and hes pretty much flowey but hes still in Goat Form which i might post later so if u are interested.... 👀

[destinyc1020]

I really like yr dissertations so ur fine lol i b writing novels as well wen i comment 😭

Yea honestly Kaias book club is good n she has great quesions for her guests n seems passionate about it. With her being so young and just the ignorance she has about nepotism/her priveldge it just makes her seem out of touch. Shes nt as bad as other nepo kids bt it dnt help her that shes moving away from the skill shes good at (modeling) and the thing she seems to want to do (acting), shes nt currently good at. This was the art comment: https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/ellendurney/kaia-gerber-said-nepotism-isnt-how-art-is-made. i remember ppl clowning her for it cuz she def got a starring role in AHS cuz she auditioned with her mom and her unintentionally calling her acting "art" is just 😬 (n like u said prob due to her being naive she mignt nt even realize her being ignorant). JE n Kaia looked miserable going to that Academy Musuem thing lmao bt they seemed fine IRL most of the time

Welp Kaia learned wat NOT to do after dating Zs ex lmaoo talking about loving that man wen they only lasted a yr.. gurl 🫣. She eems to b a fan of Z now so good for her lol

W/Austin i def agree Kaia seems like a safe choice. Theres a difference between a older woman (or just a woman around his age) who is prob established in her career and mayb wanting the nxt steps in her personal life (marriage or kids) vs a 21 yr old who is still figuring out wat she wants bt has the financial means to hang out with her bf a lot more and prob isnt thinkin bout her future rn. Austin is the best bf Kaias had so far based on how her parents seem to really like him so i think their all relieved in that aspect. i think Austin dsnt like to b single for too long either tbh. i really dnt know how this relationship bout to go lol

Thnx Anon! 🥰

Glad you enjoy my dissertations lol.

Yea Kaia's book club seems great. I've seen a couple of them over the years actually. I'm all for ppl enjoying whatever hobbies make them happy, and reading seems to be an avid hobby of hers.

Her mom Cindy is actually pretty smart. She graduated with honors and had a full scholarship to attend university for Chemical Engineering if I'm not mistaken. So maybe Kaia takes after her mom's intellectual side.🤷🏾‍♀️

But, like you said, she's still very young, naïve, and basically been living in a wealthy, southern CA bubble her whole entire life imo.

Granted, she's had some life experiences that many young women her age have never had, but she's still been pretty sheltered and just comes off as a little out of touch with the "real world" if you ask me.

Again, it's not a huge slight in itself, but more so just a testament to the fact that she was born in wealth, and she's only 21 lol 😅

I'm sorry Anon lol 😅 I couldn't with this article you linked. See, yet again.... You can tell that she's a sweet girl, but very naïve..... just in MY opinion lol.

I don't think she realizes that her mom doesn't have to call in to beg people to put her on the runway or in films. I don't think she realizes that just by being Rande and Cindy's daughter, she automatically has a leg up just due to her name ONLY.

And ummm.... according to what I've heard... 👀 Supposedly, some hard-working actresses who've come from nothing and have had to WORK their way up, have complained about losing parts to Kaia Gerber, even though they are better actresses. 🥴 Again, sip or spit, but that's just what I've heard. 👀

So yea, some people aren't happy that she's been getting a lot of opportunities (even in the modeling world) just for her name and familial background only.

Re: Austin....

Like I said before, I REALLY don't seem him settling down anytime soon. I'm not getting those vibes from him. I'm sure he loves her and her family, but he seems more focused on his career rn imo. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Plus, they haven't even dated each other for 2 years yet. Idk why some fans are pushing marriage on them, or trying to make it seem like she's "the one".

I personally would not advise someone (especially an ACTOR) who travels a LOT for a living, and works away from home for months out of the year, to go and put a ring on a girl he's barely known not even two years yet. 🥴 Could it happen? Yes. But I wouldn't advise it.

I know he doesn't like to be single for too long (a lot of ppl don't lol 😂), but if he and Kaia do break up one day, my advice to him would be to take a sabbatical and just be SINGLE for a few months lol.

Based on what I saw during the awards season, I'm sure he'd have PLENTY of female options (young AND old! 👀) if he and Kaia were to ever spilt up rofl 🤣 So he doesn't have to worry about not having any options.

Idk how the rlshp will go, but they seem happy, and I can't hate on them. 🤷🏾‍♀️

I don't get the vibe that they're endgame though. Idk why, but as of right now, I'm just not seeing it. Plus, Leo DiCaprio has dated a ton of young, pretty models all his life. If they were really what they're cracked up to be, wouldn't you think he would have married one of those women by now, or at the very least, made one of these models his life partner by now? Leo's longest rlshp has been Gisele Bundchen, and they were together for 5 years. He to this day has not been in a rlshp longer than that. So, obviously, dating models isn't really the endgame for him either! You would think that after all these years, he would try smthg different since the young, 25 year old model thing hasn't been working out lol 😆

Anyway, I just hope Austin is staying smart in his decisions. Kaia's family has always kind of made me give them the side-eye.... Supposedly, female employees from Rande's business have accused him of sexual harassment.... 👀 I remember the days when Kaia looked like she may have had an ED 👀..... The son, Presley, has been giving signs to me that he's been crying out for help for years.... 🥴 They've allowed their daughter to date grown men ever since she was a teenager.... 🥴👀

Idk... part of me wants to tell Austin: "Austin run! Please run.... there's smthg off with this family!!!!" 😬

But hey, it's not my life lol 😆 And who knows? Maybe one day she will be Mrs. Kaia Butler. 🤭

[m0nsterjuice-art]

Hiiiiii your artstyle so good for these guys (Alex kinna looks like a character that would be illustrated in a Roald Dahl book) and I love them.

I do got some questions about them

1. How does Alex hide away springs when other people like freinds or technicians coming into the apartment? Not many places for the big guy to hide. Plus there would be that rotting/colone smell to explain away

2. Springtrap was born in the UK right? Why did he leave? Does he miss the place sometimes?

3. Is OMC always this serious slightly grumpy guy or is it just because he deals with they 2 most insufferable people on earth?

4. From what I gather Springtrap likes a good bit of classy/expensive stuff. since Alex lives in a (probably small) apartment and is, y'know, Alex, is it hard for him to get these things for his bf with the wage whatever his new job is pays him? (And does he try any get rich quick schemes to get around that lol)

5. Does Alex have any friends, or was he just this loner guy before Springtrap? If he does, do they find this change in his habits and purchases and this furry he only brings out on Halloween odd or just typical Alex?

6. What was that "newfangled device" that springs screwed up useing so badly it blasted the soul out of him lol I'm curious.

aww thank you! I'm happy ppl like my character designs and art style 😭

anyways, SO

1. Springtrap usually hides in his bedroom closet, or even leaves outright ahead of time. if he's ever in a bind, he can stay still and be passed off as one of Alex's many horror movie paraphernalia. It's thankfully not frequent, and Alex intentionally avoids company, pretending to be embarrassed about his home.

Springtrap would indeed stink initially, but he eventually gets steam+enzyme base cleaned enough so he just smells like a junky old sofa.... that wears middle-aged man cologne lol.

2. William in this AU left the UK for the US to both get away from his overbearing and dysfunctional family, and to find more opportunities for his engineering degree. It's not in any art, only briefly mentioned in a one-shot i wrote over a year ago.

3. OMC is a generally stoic figure, being an immortal god of death, however his patience with William/Springtrap has run very thin. He has a long history with him and his immortality experimentation- playing god, is what led him to getting involved in the first place, as it was inhibiting any souls involved from moving on to the afterlife.

I wouldn't exactly call him grumpy though, actually he's quite patient and compassionate. He allowed Springtrap to set the rules for how his soul is claimed, because he knows how important this life and Alex is to him. He also made sure to let Alex know about this, and settled any lingering doubts. Unfortunately there's a lot of stuff I have yet to get to, but he's ultimately a positive figure, not a negative one. He just wants William's wrongs fixed (more will be shown in Hare-brained)

4. Yes Springtrap was born in a wealthy family, went to one of the most prestigious of universities, and became a wealthy man himself. So even in death, he has... refined taste. Alex works a lot, but Springtrap does not expect anything outside of their price range, because yeeeah he's not exactly working any glamorous jobs. He just wants matching kitchenware and bathroom towels lol, and he makes sure everything is clean. His home might be tiny, but Springtrap is still overall grateful for a place to live alongside his loved one.

Springtrap does manage their finances, and he's able to track what is it isn't appropriate. He also takes advantage of any benefits/ect Alex is qualified for that he's ignorant of. However. they both absolutely would get involved with get rich quick schemes hahaha, which im sure backfire.

5. Alex isn't overly social, but he gets along with people/coworkers, and he does have friends. He avoids hangouts at his apartment, which isn't people's first pick anyways so it works out. This new boyfriend they hear glimpses of is an absolute mystery through, Alex will make excuses or try not to bring it up, but I'm sure he can't hide it forever lol.

a comic I've contemplated for a good while is 1 or 2 good friends forcing Alex to come clean and actually being introduced to him, and while initially freaked out, they quickly realize how suspicious and sinister he really is (they know how gullible Alex is), which Springtrap becomes aware of and becomes hostile in turn, afraid of them jeopardizing their relationship. Little do they know Alex is not the one who's in danger. It'd end with them all realizing they all have his best interest in mind, and becoming another support network in case anything happens to either one of them. some day.

6. Springtrap loves to tinker, he's naturally curious and his neurodivergent ass can't help but tear shit apart to see how it works, or think of new ideas to create. I think it'd have something to do with a modern microwave personally, a transformer from one of those things can easily output a high enough voltage to kill a person.

Alex like to give him junk from pawn shops/ect to tear apart so he can learn, like Bluetooth speakers or older computers. Alex might have no clue what he's doing, but he's always happy to support him and his passions.

Ok I hope that covers everything ok!