#and be afraid on occasions
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Sometimes I think about when Minthara first joins camp after you save her from Moonrise. She sits in her tent, alone at night, surrounded by strangers who she believes have every reason to kill her. She sits there paranoid, feeling that they will just kill her at any moment for any reason. You have earned a small sliver of her trust, but not completely. And she goes along with you and everyone because she really doesn't have much of a choice. And it's not like her fears are unfounded, some of the companions do state their reservations about her when she is first recruited (and one of the companions actually does want her dead if a certain datamine ever gets added to the game).
She only comes to completely trust you when you allow her to read your mind. But, it doesn't clear her of any paranoia with the other companions. She only trusts them because you trust them, and she trusts you.
In spite of this paranoia and fear, she is still willing to risk her life to protect them and save them from whatever trouble comes their way. Even if she won't admit it, she does care about all the companions in camp. Yes, even the wizard. But she feels that none of them will ever lift a finger for her and will let her die when she needs help the most.
One of the many reasons why Orin kidnapping her is so heartbreaking. Because ALL of the companions want to go and save her and get her back from Orin. And one of them is extremely outraged and pissed that Orin had the audacity to take her Minthara away from her. The one time the companions show unanimous love and support for Minthara, she isn't even there to hear it. If only she knew how much they wanted her back, she would probably stop being so paranoid of them.
And she attends the reunion party still thinking that nobody likes her and they all hang out without her. When in reality, they all love her. She is surrounded by people who love her, and she thinks they hate her and are still plotting to kill her. And it's all because she wasn't there to hear how much they do care about her.
#baldur's gate 3#minthara bg3#minthara#minthara baenre#if there is anybody who needs a group hug it's minthara#girl is so terrified of everyone and everything around her#afraid that she will be betrayed by them at any moment#but everyone comes to love her for who she is#and they would all do anything to help her when she needs them#also why the underdark ending as a default ending for her is so sad because she goes down there alone#feeling that she has no reason to remain on the surface and she's better off trying to conquer her house instead#fighting a fight that she already fears she will die in#and she would end up dying alone#and she has expressed on numerous occasions just how terrified she is of dying alone#i wonder if she would choose to stay on the surface if she knew how much everyone wanted her there#especially Karlach
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top 3 iconic tv movie line of all time
i swear i can draw lee without making him look like the kuukiyomi consider it guy or a saint on a medieval tapestry
#other top 3 are#youre tired of life but afraid of dying#and i always drezzzz for the occasion#chang lee#roberts!master#doctor who 1996#doctor who tv movie#doctor who#my art#screenshot redraw
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I miss them so bad (Dick and Damian)
#ramblings of a lunatic#dc comics#damian wayne#dick grayson#ITS JUST NOT THE SAME MAN#idk i was reading nightwing must die (again...) bc i was in a funk and saw another post saying how fans exaggerate the closeness btwn them#and on the one hand i get it. there is a very rosy portrayal of their relationship you'll come across in fanon#and they weren't very close at the beginning of their relationship#but man. reading Nightwing must die again was like#YES they fight. damian instigates it and while dick tries to exercise patience he does fight back/lash out on occasion#but despite all that it's still emphasized how important the two are to each other#when dick is forced to picture a future where he's lost his way he pictures damian being the one to bring him back#not necessarily bc damian is his favorite person on the planet but bc he gave damian robin. for a lot of practical reasons-#-but also bc how far damians come is (i think at least based on this arc) a testament to dick that hes doing Something right#both as a hero/person#damian is more than just a burden saddled on him (although there's an element of that in their batman and robin run)#he's also a last remaining connection to bruce when he's gone (remembering where he comes from) AND he's training damian+#-his own way! with a dash of tough love and workaholic spirit inherited but also a lot of patience and focus on being More than the darkness#idc what ppl say nightwing must die makes sense for these two. its a retcon but one that works imo#that dick buried his head in the sand about how much damian meant/the responsibility he had to him bc it was a commitment he was afraid of#and how damian ultimately was a point of maturation for dick even if he went back to being Nightwing#they were SO goddamn close and now they're still close but only in ways that are implied#and their bond is deemphasized in comparison to each others bond w/ say bruce. which i think is a shame#it was a wrinkle! a fun wrinkle that the batfamily had that in some ways dick understood damian better than Bruce-#-even if he didn't feel like he could handle the responsibility of raising him full time#it kills me that bc of the n52 we never got the handover of the batman mantle (and damian) from dick to bruce#next nightwing writer...include a flashback to that moment AND have damian appear in the book in present....AND MY LIFE IS YOURS!!!#anyway. dick is damians brother but also damian a little bit imprinted on him like a baby duck and its rubbed off on dick#they're partners they're mentor mentee but most importantly they were batman and robin. and they were the greatest#NOT bc it was all peaches and roses but bc they cared for each other exponentially despite all that
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yes i lack affective empathy and have a slight tendency towards violence but i am also afraid of everything and am “unhealthily” obsessed with morality so it balances out to being normal
#iso.txt#somewhat underplaying my negative traits here. it is fine#people have ‘accused’ me of being a sociopath on numerous occasions but the two latter traits rule that out#i am manipulative unempathetic and kind of impulsive. but i am also afraid of everything. and ashamed of everything#being too vulnerable on main hours
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I usually post about Odd Squad on my main but it's cluttered with other stuff that happened today, so I present a beautiful story in two images:
#i had to watch happy halfiversary just to commemorate this occasion#odd squad#cast reunion#anna cathcart#isaac kragten#i am afraid i have fallen back down the odd squad rabbit hole#like dang that writing is insane#i didn't hate it#television#not a review
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I think I will wear lolita fashion when I get home. As a treat.
#I feel bad wanting to get more lolita accessories because there's never any occasion to wear the pieces I *do* have#but literally what's stopping me#(also i gained some stress weight in '22 & '23 so i'm afraid of it not fitting)#(not a full coord. maybe just a skirt if i can fit in it)#majobun chatter
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Times Brom and his Babes shared clothing
What else do they share? 🤔 Another Sleepy Hollow mystery 💀
#shipwrecked comedy#headless series#brom bones#brom's babes#Why'd I remember there being more occasions 🤔#ofc you'd expect a post such as this from me 🐦#self proclaimed number 1 babes fan#and I'm not afraid to annoy my followers with them#🕺#anyway watch Headless
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Sometimes I realize how much self-indulgent dirkjohn I made and it's like. Genuinely impressive to me. I'm impressed by my own art/fic and even analysis posts because damn, I miss my own energy, you mean I was able to just make shit up because I tend to be a little bit bonkers when I'm really passionate about something? For real?
#i did it with other things too but dirkjohn is one thing that keeps coming back when i least expect#they live in my head like freeloaders and never leave#just get quiet until i think about them literally out of nowhere#i was kinda spacing out in a bus the other day because there wasn't much to look at#and BOOM suddenly I intercept a dirkjohn braincell#they were talking about how to break the news about their relationship to the others btw#today I thought about earth c john accidentally conditioning dirk to be more honest#which just made dirk speak his mind and be a little more snarky in conversations he'd normally overthink in one way or another#john enjoys the mutual teasing and banter with this slightly more bitchy dirk who doesn't hold himself back#but other people like dave and jake aren't exactly prepared for his douche side even though they're supposed to be#but dirk was too afraid to disappoint them in any way#so he was actively biting his tongue on many occasions#dirk's most honest thoughts are mixed blessings#...and here's what I mean by 'freeloaders'#they just live their lives in my head#good for them#dirkjohn
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oliver can't be trusted under any circumstances but especially if you leave him alone in your room. the first time you finally let him into your room and tell him to sit there and not snoop around, naturally it's all he thinks about doing. contrary to what you think, though, he actually doesn't need to snoop around. you have one of the pillows you use to get off out on the bed right next to him — it smells like you and looks good enough for an angle he's learned you can cum with when with him. you make it so easy to know you even when you deny. if you ask him (you don’t. he just tells you) the pillow found him
#and you may even forget to put your vibr*tor away on occasion. and he sees it. finds it. same thing. yes he can't be trusted#but even you can't be trusted to at least try to hide anything either. which is why you drive him so insane… he has no choice but to be the#-bane of your existence. bc u make it sooo easy to be#ACKSKJFNF#sora.post#sora.oliver#I NEED TO WRITE THIS OUT like a full little fic 😭😭😭 i ALR started im afraid AOFJFJ dialogue of this in my head is so wicked#also if u saw me post this earlier no u didn’t bc tumblr ate it for having a certain word in tags 😒
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JoJo Siwa doesn’t deserve all the hate (and homophobia) she’s getting for her style and music; but she does deserve scrutiny for defending Colleen Ballinger and being both active and complicit in abuse that happened on her TV show. Like the girl has been under the public eye in unhealthy environments all her life; cut her some slack — not too much; she’s still a responsible adult — but if you’re going to dogpile her, then at least dogpile her for the right reasons. Jesus Fucking Christ.
#jojo siwa#discourse#Her comment sections are VILE#I actually don’t hate her songs. They’re basically early-2000s new old stock and I like early 2000s music#Is she trying too hard to look like an “adult?” Yes. But that’s understandable.#What isn’t understandable is screaming at children for no fucking reason#and JoJo not helping at all when a girl was hemorrhaging out her belly button#when JoJo’s mother told the girl to “put a pad on it”#I don’t care how afraid you are of your parents; you END that shit the second you see it#I was raised in a cult and I actively sabotaged my parents’ preaching work on multiple occasions#I didn’t know if I’d get kicked out if they found out I did that; the only reason I still have a relationship with them#is because they never found out about my later sabotage#Dad preached to a waitress dangling a cure for her sons’ disorder in front of her nose as incentive to join and gave her literature#So I went to the restaurant with him and insisted I pay for the tip.#I gave her eight dollars and a sticky note with a bunch of keywords about the cult’s abuses to look up#The next time I went there#she said didn’t understand the sticky note and asked me while he was gone what I meant#I hate talking to people especially when I’m under pressure because I trip over my words even when I’m NOT anxious#But her kids’ lives being free of a cult meant more to me than avoiding a momentary discomfort so I gave a quick rundown#She thanked me and heeded my warning basically playing along with me and not saying anything to my dad about it#I was 20; JoJo was about 19 when her show was going on#She had no excuse for allowing her mom to do that.#At the very least she could have said “Oh god I’m so sorry she said that. Please don’t hurt yourself for my show; go to the hospital.”#But no. She didn’t do that. In fact she screamed at children and joked that if they were crying then it was a good show.#Bitch come here and do that in front of me. I double dog dare you. I may only be 5’5” but I fight dirty and I’m angrier than you#Sorry. I guess I do hate her… for THAT specifically.#Like yeah I’ve fucked up with the kids I help and yelled when I didn’t have to but I HATED doing it and tried to do better later#Why someone would SCREAM at kids on purpose for long periods of time for no reason is beyond me
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no one can know about the weird gay thing i have going on with kms jokes
#mordred mental microscope moment#spire rambles#cw suicide mention#ITS REALLY FUNNY LIKE .#Somehow ive been making them way more (still not often tbf just On Occasion) as a Direct Result of my mental health improving#because suicide was/is a Major Theme of my OCD to the point that i was like. afraid to even think about it#lest i accidentally condition myself into wanting it#which was frankly more damaging to my Me than any joke has ever been .#i mean obviously i dont make them around people i dont know for Absolutely Certain are comfortable with them#and even then i do try to avoid them if just because there are far funnier and more creative jokes i could make. but like.#being able to make a Shitty Little Joak to myself is. i guess like my way of saying Fuck You to the Obsessive Compulsions (from the Disorde#if that makes sense. it probably doesnt. but ehhh whagtever im literally just fuckin saying words#i can say whatever. My house (blog)
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now hear me out.
#i can actually go into heavy detail#the scarecrow craving a brain to be able to be smart and thoughtful#but then the whole journey being the one who keeps coming up with solutions and strategies to overcome their obstacles#and the tin man who yearns for a heart and thinks he cant love anymore because hes missing the heart#but who says i wont kill anything and i will protect these tiny mice from any dangerous predators nd do whats in my power to help my friends#and the cowardly lion who keeps saying hes afraid of everything#but on every occasion that they face danger he offers to fight for his companions and face the monsters he fears to the point of sacrifice#im reading the wizard of oz rn but the raven cycle brain rot never stops#so you get this#the raven cycle#trc#gangsey
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#OF MONSTERS AND MEN: musings.#YOUR NEED GREW TEETH: character study.#character introspection.#ahh... something about this is so accurate NGL like sadly barton will always have this-#immense anger in him i feel like no matter what he does to try to contain it / surpress it and this is-#because it has literally become a part of who he is as a person. ans by that i mean he ALWAYS has a sense-#of rage stirring within him that is just waiting to be unleashed and that is both kind of disheartening as well as scary#including for him. but barton is also used to it so it's like... he's grown a bit desensitized to it at the same time#even though that's arguably pretty sad to think about. barton is just not good at processing his emotions in healthy-#ways so his sadness is commonly turned into anger and the rare occasions where he does feel guilt / shame?#they also come off as anger because it is a much easier emotion for barton to process than sadness#so yeahhh. man's has definitely got some issues that he needs to work out regarding how you don't need to be-#afraid of getting sad especially if you have a good support system to help you through it... but he just JSJSJ refuses to-#show those kinds of feelings around people for a prolonged amount of time bc he doesn't trust that people won't use it-#to try to 'take advantage of him' so to speak since barton himself has cheered people up for that sole purpose before. thus it's all like-#one big vicious cycle y'know bc he fears the very thing that he practices.
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I feel like Ivan’s worship of Luka could either go along the lines of “I would do anything for you”top! or “I would let you do anything to me” bottom!
#discuss with the class.#things I wouldn’t post on Twitter#I feel that in general service top suits him#but in some occasions…#especially with a mix of praise kink#I just yearn for whumpy Ivan#and there’s too little of it I’m afraid
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Thinking about Ethan Hunt hours again. He’s from Wyoming. He had a weird bob in the 2000s. He’s a spy but his parents are alive, he’s deeply earnest, and he refuses to stop making friends. He’s both inherently kind and super bitchy and it’s a lottery which you’ll get based on how many high speed chases he’d been on that day. He’s amicably divorced. He has a deep emotional connection to all motorcycles and the worst sunglasses you’ve ever seen. He is filled with unresolved trauma and untreated injuries. He’s 5’7. He is very in love with all of his friends, all of his exes, and some of his enemies. Genuinely an unparalleled guy.
#ethan hunt#mission impossible#he’s so silly#I want to keep him in a cupboard for special occasions#his antics cause both anxiety and joy#he’s my little meow meow#but hes gotta stop climbing on tall things I am afraid of heights and its a solid 15 minutes of very tense silence
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Option-12? Cedona?? pls say more about your robot, what story are they from?
They're actually two separate characters! They're both Starfinder PCs!
Cedona was an Android Mystic NPC I took over when I joined an ongoing Against the Aeon Throne campaign — it's how I met a lot of my CA friends!
(Prior to this Starfinder game, the only games I'd been involved in were the 5e homebrew game I was running, and the EXTREMELY crunchy, tactical Path of War Pathfinder and Edge of the Empire campaigns I'd been playing since college. This Starfinder game was. SOOOO~ not that lol.)
The very first Starfinder session I played in was literally a funeral episode for another PC who'd perma-died right before I joined, and by the end of that session we were all bawling lol. 😂 Delightful, 100/10 gameplay experience but SUCH a whiplash for me, it totally opened my eyes to a whole new way of playing.
Cedona was quiet, subtle, graceful, and internally constantly terrified that her programming has been tampered with (it had been 🙃). She gave me my first taste of playing a PC whose backstory was intrinsically tied up in the plot and I've never looked back lol.
She also romanced the other android in the party towards the end of the game and they were very sweet together lol. Have some EXTREMELY old art about it (and the beach episode):
Option-12 was also an Android (Androids are like half-elves for me lol, I just really like them) but she was a mechanic!
She's from a Starfinder oneshot (turned into a twoshot...) that we as players all thought was a murder mystery, but LITTLE DID WE KNOW it was actually game of Among Us, which was the funniest "...hey hey hEY wait a minute!!!!" moment I have ever been a part of. 😂
Option-12 was gleaming chrome and dumb as a doorstop and she died way too soon, but for a brief and shining moment I loved her. 😂😂
#dnd#I really loved Cedona she sure did experience the horrors#the thruline from Cedona to Mal is that in both games the GM had the power to turn to me and go:#''I'm afraid you are about to malfunction terribly :)''#and I just had to accept it#and in both occasions it's been INCREDIBLY fun I genuinely love when my PC gets messed with#the GM of Starfinder was so apologetic initially like: ''if you take over this character it WILL be fun but bad things will happen to you''#and I was like ''...promise??'' and here we are lol#oh look#it's my art
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