#and by then he already got closure for some stuff in his past (relating to how he originally died and one of his friends and ghosts)

[whumpy-wyrms]

Has Aspen watched Wolfwalkers before? I think he would absolutely love that movie :)

YESSSS YES YES ASPEN FUCKING LOVESSSSSS THAT MOVIEEE

AND SO DO I!!!!!!! like i’ve never seen that movie before but i’ve wanted to watch it for a long time and this ask FINALLY made me watch it and oh my god HOLY SHIT IT’S ONE OF MY FAVORITE MOVIES NOW. i literally JUST finished it and i don’t even know what to say besides this

i need everyone to watch this clip in particular because holy shit i cried during it /pos. like i can’t even describe how much i love this movie and how much it means to me just wow WOW it’s absolutely fucking amazing and i definitely recommend it to everyone. the animation is stunning i love the main characters and everything is just so EXPRESSIVE and the COLORS ANR AHHHH THE WOLVESSSS

Aspen loves it. it’s one of his favorite movies now too (maybe his favorite idk i’ll have to think of what other movies he likes) but guys i don’t even know what to sayyyy that movie is sooo good

thank you so much for sending this ask because wow i don’t know what it is with me and wolves now but wolves are COOL and i LOVE this movie i’m so happy i finally watched it!!! :D

[taylor-on-your-dash]

11 Questions With Taylor Swift (The Boot - Nov 5, 2007)

At the ripe old age of 17, Taylor Swift is already in the country music history books. She's the only female solo artist ever to write or co-write every song on a platinum-selling debut album. And though the songwriting prodigy is hard at work on her second album, she isn't quite ready to put the CD that's earned her numerous accolades to rest. Swift recently sat down with us to talk about beefing up her eponymous debut. And in true teenage fashion, we also gab about boys, high school drama and how she helped her buddy Kellie Pickler through a tough breakup.

Tell us what's included on the new 'Taylor Swift [Deluxe Edition]' project.

The album has been out for a year, but it's too early to put out the second studio album. But we wanted to give [the fans] more music. So this was an opportunity to put out three new songs and a bunch of exclusive content. I actually edited a home movie on my laptop, and it's on there as a special feature. There's my first phone conversation with Tim McGraw, all my music videos and a bunch of concert footage. The [new] songs are demos that I wrote when I was 15, trying to get a record deal. (x)

Is there a true story behind your current single, 'Our Song'?

I wrote this song in my freshman year of high school for my ninth grade talent show. I was sitting there thinking, "I've gotta write an upbeat song that's gonna relate to everyone." And at that time, I was dating a guy and we didn't have a song. So I wrote us one, and I played it at the show. Months later, people would come up to me and say, "I loved that song that you played." And then they'd start singing lines of it back to me. They'd only heard it once, so I thought, "There must be something here!" (x)

You've toured with some notorious pranksters, namely Rascal Flatts and Brad Paisley. What's the funniest joke that's been played on you?

Brad Paisley hasn't pranked me yet ... because he's afraid of me. [laughs] But Rascal Flatts had all of their crew take fold-out chairs and just sit on the stage during my performance. So there were eight guys, just sitting on stage reading the newspaper. And I'm playing right next to their faces, kinda hamming it up, trying to intimidate them. And I look in the newspapers they're reading, and there are Chippendales models in the newspapers! [laughs] (x)

We hear you wrote a song with Kellie Pickler for her next album.

Kellie came on my bus this summer and was all upset about her ex-boyfriend. She was like, "I just want to be over this!" And she gets up on stage now and tells everyone all about it. She's like [imitating Kellie], "He went out and got some other girl pregnant!" [laughs] And I'm like, "OK, if you want to tell everyone your personal stuff, but there's no better way to get over something than to write it all down." So we went into the back bedroom of my tour bus and wrote this awesome song. It's about how, for the rest of his life, he's going to regret cheating on her. And she's said to me since then, "You know what, I didn't think there was anything I could do to really get past that. But writing that song gave me complete closure." (x)

Is there anything you miss about high school?

I don't think there's really anything I miss, to be honest. There's a lot less drama when you're touring the country on a major tour. And I've actually been to prom before ... twice. So I don't want anyone to feel bad for me. It was really great that I got to experience those first two years of high school, and I'll never forget that. I learned a lot. But I feel like I've had the best senior year ever. (x)

How would you say your young age has helped you and how has it hurt you in the music business?

I think my age has helped me, because I can write about things I'm going through and girls my age can automatically relate. And I think [my age] has hurt me, because in the beginning, people were like, "Teenagers and country music? No way!" And I had interviewers who were dead-set on trying to get me to feel bad about how old I was. But you have to stand by who you are. I am 17-year-old girl, and I'm not ashamed of that. Age should not limit what you can accomplish. (x)

Is there a special guy in your life?

I'm completely single! I think that love is something that hits you when you're not looking for it. So I've been actively not looking for it for like two years. [laughs] I'm always the third wheel on my friends' dates. I have a bunch of best friends who never go more than a month without having a boyfriend. And I think that's kinda rubbed off on me, because I've seen the stuff they've gone through over the past two years. And I'm just like, "I'm gonna pursue my career instead." (x)

Garth Brooks has said that you are one of his daughters' favorite singers. Is that surreal to hear that a living legend is familiar with your music?

He is a living legend! And if you asked me who my hero is, I'd say Garth Brooks. I've met Garth's girls, they're wonderful. They came out to one of my shows. And it's just so unbelievable to see someone like Garth Brooks have kids who like my music. I'm like, "Are you kidding me? Your dad is Garth Brooks!" It's the coolest feeling ever. (x)

Do you have any other famous fans?

I was at the ACM Awards, and Emma Roberts came up to me backstage. She was like, "I just have to let you know, I'm announcing you tonight. And I'm a really big fan." And I was like, "Oh my gosh, I'm going to see your movie this weekend!" It was really cool. She's a sweetheart. (x)

Unlike a lot of other teen celebrities, you have managed to keep out of trouble. How do you resist temptation?

You have to surround yourself with good people who will tell you the things that maybe you don't want to hear -- the things you need to know to not do. I feel like I have an obligation to be responsible. I have a million people who went out and bought my album. Who knows how many of them were young girls? And I always think about the ten year old girl in the front row at my concert before I make a decision. "What would she think if she saw me do this? Would this affect her choices?" (x)

Out of all the milestones you've hit this year -- platinum sales, 8 weeks at No.1 on the country album charts, a CMT award, a CMA nomination -- what's been the highlight of your career?

The highlight of my career so far has been winning the CMT Breakthrough Video of the Year award. It's a fan-voted awards show, so I don't see any greater honor than winning an award that was voted on by fans. It was for my first video that I ever put out ['Tim McGraw'], and I'll never forget the feeling of just running ... bolting up to that stage. It was just the most amazing feeling. (x)

[majorbaby]

started writing some postwar mulcahy stuff, a lot of it pretty critical of him as a character, feat. BJ when i realized i care more about him and BJ as mirrors in GFA

standard mulcahy disclaimer: my interpretation of him as a character is heavily tied to his vocation as a catholic priest. given that i have an overwhelmingly negative view of the catholic church as an institution and an even worse opinion of volunteer clergy in asia in particular, that means a lot of my views about him tend to be negative.

i think that's a valid interpretation to have because he's a tertiary character and often isn't given the opportunity for a three-dimensional person to be established. and also because i'm primarily interested in MASH as a satirical critique of the army, so i tend to care about where a character falls in relation to the establishment more than i care about their personal drama. hawkeye and margaret are exceptions to that rule only because their drama is so varied and heavily focused on.

they really pushed the 'crisis of faith' with mulcahy in GFA and i'm not into that. reason being, i think more people ought to have crises of faith when confronted with the reality that their all-loving, all-compassionate god has an army of earthly foot-soldiers who often do not seem to be motivated by compassion or love. It is comical to suggest that this is the first time mulcahy has wondered "whether god is deaf" honey there's a war on. I get it, it's his finale drama, but i think the problem is that (to his credit) it's reasonable for him to have had such a crisis earlier on during any of the other heartbreaking things he bears witness to so i was rolling my eyes.

what i did think was interesting was the drawn-out interaction between beejcahy (that's what i'm calling it! sorry lol). here you have two characters who are utterly beholden to their belief systems, which are oppressive to them and oppressive to others. and you also have a show that is completely oblivious to that most of the time, rarely having either character question their beliefs. i would argue that charles has done more to grow his worldview and that is because charles' worldview is positioned by the narrative as a character flaw he ought to grow out of. as opposed to the famously virtuous and unproblematic catholic dogma or standard WASP nuclear family programming.

and as i mentioned with mulcahy because i don't have a range of character traits or drama to point to without headcanonry, i have to give a lot of importance to his being a catholic priest.

so BJ's got his american dream and mulcahy's got the catholic church. i think it's totally valid for mulcahy to not want to share his disability with other people, but i also can't ignore that it's BJ who helps him keep that from the people around them, who'd of course want to help him. makes total sense to me that BJ would be understanding of that, because he does it himself all the time, and seems to think that's worked out soooooo great.

i find the bit he says about having already done his time in purgatory annoying because you don't volunteer to go to purgatory, not that hawkeye or BJ have anything to say about that lol. i know i am being a killjoy about mulcahy's warm finale moment but i cannot see past the unintentional parody.

he gets on the truck without anyone except BJ knowing what's happened, not even hawkeye who by virtue of being the protagonist had a closer relationship with mulcahy than anyone else on the show. as with BJ, hawkeye verbalizes that his doubt that he will ever see mulcahy again and also as with BJ i am inclined to trust hawkeye on that one. Imo, it lends further credibility to the argument against any kind of 4077th reunion. this part of their lives is over, and closure is achieved but there are still some major things left unsaid. without committing to any one headcanon for postwar mulcahy (partially because he was on aftermash and i have no interest in watching that), my view of catholicism being an unreliable support system and uncertainty around how he will process his trauma has me leaning towards a breakdown for him once he gets home.

[lilacastar]

KDA 20: Familiar stranger

A bell dinged as Randle pushed the door open, holding it for him and 5K.

"Welcome in." A voice with little enthusiasm said absentmindedly.

He stepped closer into the establishment, the scent of ink and tools brought back a vague familiarity he couldn't quite place. Perhaps the time he got a tattoo done in his friend's basement? The poorly done star sign still marked his shoulder.

A tall woman stood, cleaning up equipment on the work table.

"Walk-ins are accepted, but I do have an appointment in-" Her voice trailed upon seeing them. Or maybe just Kalrick.

"I guess I'm only important when you need something, huh?" She laughed, making light in what she already knew. "Where've you been, Riki?"

"Are you Valery?" He asked the obvious. The tall woman surveyed them, dressed in black pants, and a tight black tank. Black, thick eyeliner and black lipstick, and naturally, covered in tattoos.

"Are you brain damaged?"

"Essentially, yeah."

She laughed, before noticing he wasn't joining, and her smile slowly died.

"Are you serious?" Her tone dropped flat.

"Yeah, I'm not joking."

She searched 5K and Randle's reaction, as if they were in on the joke. They didn't react, concluding the sincerity of the situation.

"I am, so sorry, fuck- I thought you were fucking with me,"

"It's fine," He shook his head.

"What happened? Is that why you've been gone?."

"Basically a demo-" He paused, rethinking the plausibility of the truth and reflected on something more believable. "I went through a dissociative episode for the past two years, and basically my entire self was someone else. But I'm back now, looking for some closure, I guess."

She held an odd almost-smile, Kalrick couldn't quite read. Her eyes glanced him over, but he didn't care what she was judging really. There wasn't a whole lot he could stoop lower to at this point.

"What?" He scowled up at her. He wasn't tall to begin with, but his head came up to her shoulder.

"I just feel really bad now, like, so bad. You would not believe."

"I'm not really here for pity."

"That honestly makes me feel worse."

"Well I'm not going to comfort you, I just want to know some stuff." He turned to his friends. "What am I here for again?"

"Honestly, I don't remember." 5K said.

"She tattooed you," Randle sighed. "And safe to assume, other things."

"Right," Kalrick continued, and extended his wrists. "You did this, right?"

She surveyed her ruined work, the fresh scars breaking the sigil. "Yeah, and the other 4 you have."

"Did I ever say whose sigil it was? Or anything relating to what I was doing?"

"Nope, all I made sure was that it wasn't a hate symbol, cause I don't do those."

"You're telling me you don't know anything? Not even who I was to you?"

"Who I was? We weren't much man, mostly just physical. You liked sex, I liked sex, we both got what we wanted. It was on and off, you're pretty skidish. And then disappeared for two months."

"But you had to have heard or seen something about what I was doing. Anything relating to this." He gestured to his wrists again.

"I mean, you were obsessed with that. I don't know what it is, but you were completely obsessed with it. You drew it in notebooks, walked in the pattern, and I think worshiped it at the Baptist church."

"Heritage church?"

"Yeah, that one. Do you for real not remember anything? Or is it patchy, or.."

"Treat me like a clean slate."

"I don't really have much else for you. We fucked, you were obsessed with the sigil and church, and you were in general strange."

"That's my default, how strange do I got to be to be even more?"

"Well," Her voice trailed momentarily. "When you first got inked, you were different. Then you stopped using a phone. When I say you were skidish, I don't think anyone could contact you except through carrier pigeon. You just came when you pleased."

"So I was noticeably different, and this wasn't concerning?"

She started to rearrange the tools again, hands fidgeting but there wasn't anything to clean anymore.

"Little dude, you were very persistent in not talking about your life and avoiding questions. Like, whatever you told me about disassociating, I straight up believe you because you are wildly different right now. But two months ago, you were not asking questions like this, in fact, you'd leave on site if I asked too many. You were just the weird guy who liked having sex with me and paid well for the tattoos."

Something about the conversation left a bad taste in his mouth. He didn't have the words quite yet, but with time it'd happen. As for now, uneasy was what he could call it.

"Well," he shifted, getting ready to go. "I have your phone number and I, Kalrick not Riki, use a phone. Text me if you suddenly remember something."

"Wait!" she called after him, the trio already leaving.

He waited expectantly, but her calculating gaze implied she did indeed have more knowledge.

"At least let me fix your hair."

"My hair? I just cut it."

"Yeah I can tell. Please let me fix it, it's salvageable, it really is."

"I don't care what it looks like, I just needed it off."

"Please, it's literally so bad." Her tone was so cheerful it almost countered the message. "I have some scissors, let me just even out the ends really quick."

"It's not that bad."

5K and Randle groaned sounds of skepticism.

"I mean," Randle mumbled. "I wasn't going to say anything because you seem to be into doing your own thing but..."

"Dog it's ugly as shit." 5K agreed.

That was saying something coming from him. His hair was cropped short, near a buzz to disguise the start of his male patterned hairline. He took no part in styling or the degree of self-care Randle did. To say it was bad, he must've meant it.

"It's the least I can do," Valery said.

"Alright," he sighed, face flushing.

She sat him down in the chair, covering his shirt with a towel.

"At least you didn't cut it too short," she said, beginning the restoration. "It's not the worst to work with, it's just wildly uneven, especially in the back."

"Thanks, it was the work of my bathroom scissors."

"Why'd you do it? It was so pretty long."

"Got too much, and wasn't me. The other guy kept it long and it reminded me... It made me feel trapped."

Randle had been staring intensely at Valery the entire time, when 5K nudged him, breaking his focus.

"Why don't we check out the flashart book at the front?" 5K encouraged.

Randle mumbled something unintelligible, but let himself be guided away anyway.

"Hey," Valery resumed. "I'm not judging. Sometimes I need to manicly cut my hair too. Usually my bangs. Or dye it, dying's a good go-to." She adjusted her position, paused, then resumed on the edges.

Being with her, chatting, felt natural despite how he didn't know her. Did she feel like she knew him? And this was just another casual encounter? She handled his hair like second nature, and his body was not afraid.

"Valery?" He asked.

"Hm?"

"Do you miss me, because I'm not him? Even though it was only about the transaction."

The rhythm of her clipping halted before continuing her original tempo.

"Why would you say something so sad?" Her upbeat voice didn't falter a bit. Instead, she sounded like she was comforting a kicked puppy.

She removed the towel, and gifted him a small mirror from the tool table. It did look noticeably better, he couldn't deny his poor craftsmanship anymore. His white hair still rested past ear length, but her handy work fixed the layers and softened up how harshly he shocked its texture.

"Thank you," he stumbled, unused to kind words coming out of himself.

"Cute, right? You're literally so cute."

"It looks good," he agreed. "But I can't have... Our relationship can't be what you remembered me as."

"I kind of figured. I still think you're cute though."

"You're attractive too, just not to me."

"Wow." She nearly coughed.

"I didn't mean it like-"

"I get it."

"No, you're pretty. It's just I'm not into girls like that."

"Oh." She stayed quiet for a few seconds, then repeated. "Oh."

"At least men is what I've always had experience with. Maybe I could experiment, I don't know. But not right now."

"No, that's completely understandable. I'm just- I'm just so sorry."

"Why? I told you I wasn't here for feeling sorry, I was just following what leads I have."

"Just in general I guess."

"It's not your fault I was sick."

She forced a half-hearted smile. "Hey, if you want a cover-up, I won't charge you."

"That's bad business, but I'll probably take you up on that." Every time he saw his wrists, it was a reminder of how his life spiraled out of his own control. Maybe his own choice of tattoo would help feel like he was back in control.

"You know where to find me."

With that, he said his thanks, collected his friends, and left the shop. He hadn't obtained the information he hoped for, but at least she had shown compassion no one else had.

[stellocchia]

I was rewatching the stream where Tommy got locked up in prison with Dream (Tommy Gets Locked In Prison with Dream) and there are just a few quotes that I want to drop here for everyone:

"What's up Dream?" "Nothing much. I lost my clock since the last time you came" "That almost... if you take the 'L' out of that word then it's... it's a different word and that's funny..." "That's the Tommy I know!"

It's just so damn uncomfortable from the get-go. Because keep in mind that Tommy went in there with the idea of getting closure. In hindsight, not the best idea, but it's not like he knew how to deal with what he went through any better.

But no, what makes it so absurdly uncomfortable it's how Dream just effortlessly steps back into the "friend" role. Immediately trying to go back to their old banter and all. And, like, Tommy didn't fall for it entirely. He was clearly uncomfortable as soon as Dream said the last line, immediately going on the defensive again, but it doesn't change that there is a part of him that still had (and possibly still has) a tendency to fall back on that as well.

"I'm glad you came to visit me, you know? It's been a while... I- I wish you'd visit me more"

Like... rewatching it I'm fairly sure that either Dream doesn't understand that Tommy doesn't, in fact, see him as a friend or he's simply very willing to ignore that fact because he's just that desperate to have him around.

"This is my last visit Dream" "Like e...? Y-y..." "Yeah. Yeah... I'm- this is my last visit seeing you" "You're- like... forever?" "Yeah. Yeah I think so" "Well... forever is a long time"

Maybe desperate then. I completely forgot how genuinely shocked he was at the news that Tommy didn't want to ever go back. I'm fairly certain that this is the first time he's left completely with no words and no idea on how to react.

Also, Dream "forever is a long time" Wastaken having absolutely no qualms as long as it's him and Tommy spending that forever together. This man really needs some new hobbies. Maybe a potted plant or something.

"...you know what? there's nothing you can fu- This is my last time visiting you. So anything you wanna say to me now you can- you have to say to me now. Uhm, 'cause I'm not gonna see you again" "Why?" "Are you fucking-"

See... that's what I mean! Like, yes, he lies and manipulates and all of that, but there could be actual confusion here. Like, I do think that Dream understands exactly how fucked up everything he did to Tommy was. I don't think he's ignorant about that at all. I do think that he may not understand why that would be enough for Tommy to want to stop "their game".

Like, he obviously knows that Tommy has a shitload of trauma from what he put him through, but that's part of the fun for Dream isn't it? So does he actually understand that that "fun" is exactly why Tommy doesn't want to be around him anymore?

"I've been suffering from success while you weren't here" "Me too... except for without the 'success' part, just suffering"

Imagine abusing someone for months and then trying to get them to pity you once you end up in jail, what a f*cking looser! Also, Tommy definitely stumbling with the response because he's just very empathetic even towards Dream. Like, he repeats to himself a few times that Dream did deserve being in jail and that he did do bad things which feels much more like a reminder for himself on why he shouldn't pity him more so than a reminder for Dream.

"You had all this shit coming!" "I did... but... you know? I don't know. Maybe one day, right?" "No! No, have you seen the prison? It's kinda the most secure thing ever! Dude, you're not- you're not leaving here! sam's name still there, okay, thank god" "I'm just saying, like, maybe one day, you know?" "I- I don't-" "Eventually" "Maybe if you have extreme therapy" "Maybe one day I'll just walk out of here. Like-" "No, I don't-" "I feel like I've already been changing since I came here"

It's interesting just how quickly Dream managed to regain control of the situation though. Trying to harp on Tommy's tendency to empathize with people.

"This is my last time here. I might- I kinda- I don't wanna-" "But why?"

He asks a second time? Is he actually just that dense? Like, I get the trying to fish for sympathy aspect. He was trying to get something useful to get out of there and whatnot. But man... that's the guy he literally abused. Did he actually expect it to work? Was he just heavily relying on Tommy's empathy to pull this off or does he actually just not understand Tommy's view on their relationship at all?

"I don't wanna know you" "I mean exile it wasn't too bad, right?" "You fu-" "I mean you still- you had, you know? I mean we hang out and stuff" "I fu- you fucking- you bastard Dream!"

Honestly hear Dream talk about exile is always fascinating. Also, a gentle reminder that Dream was well aware about Tommy being suicidal during the whole duration of the exile. And yet he still defines it as "not too bad" because they were spending time together. Just... that... something alright.

"Listen, when I'm around you my brain feels like I'm fucking conditioned to be your friend but also when I have a knife I wanna just plunge it into your heart man it's like I don't- you don't make me a good person Dream, you make me bad, alright? All this shit that's happened has been because of you and I don't- I'm moving onto bigger and better things now bitch. I- I'm done. I'm done" "But isn't- what if- what if you just- like once a month or something?" "No. No, I don't- I don't wanna know you in my life anymore. This is done"

I simply couldn't not include this. I'm too much of an inniter for that. But also Dream is STILL insisting after that speech. He still didn't give up on getting Tommy to visit him more. It may be that he was just stalling for time until the explosions now that I think about it, but still, wow.

"You're a terrible man, alright?" "I did bad things-" "You're a bad guy. You're a wronging'" "Well, everyone thinks they're right from their perspective that's why I-" "That's not true. That's not true!" "Well, I think I'm right. I did bad things but I did them for good reasons, but-" "What do you mean good reasons? You're a psychopath" "I've learned. Yeah I did bad things but I've learned that I shouldn't have done them"

See, this is what I mean when I say that c!Dream apologists parrot c!Dream's rhetoric completely. Like, the whole idea that Dream had "good reasons" for his actions and that somehow that makes them okay didn't come out of nowhere, but it's sure recontextualized a lot when you understand that Dream is spouting this kind of bullshit just to convince his abuse victim to continue spending time with him. Like, when you actually look at how Dream uses his rhetoric instead of taking it as gospel it becomes pretty interesting to see how manipulative he can get.

"No what- what good reasons? No please, please enlighten us. Please enlighten me!" "I just wanted to- I just wanted to bring the server together. Have it be a happy family, you know?" "Bri- bring the server to- you fu-"

It's incredible how he was able to say that to Tommy of all people. After Tommy just mentioned moments priors how Dream tried to kill Tubbo. After he mentioned that he has trauma related to plain biomes because of Dream towards the beginning. Tommy does immediately call out the bullshit though and that's so satisfying...

"You ruined my past Dream, but you will not ruin my future" "I'm not- I- I- Tommy! I'm trying- I'm trying to change, to be better and not be the same person I was and you- it- it doesn't- y- you can visit me. Like, every now and then, right? It'll help! It'll help! Right? It'll help- it'll help me... be better" "Fuck off mate"

This was honestly the reason I rewatched the stream in the first place. I was looking for this specific quote because I thought I remembered it from somewhere and then I got distracted...

But yeah, the reason I was looking for it is that this is possibly the single slimiest f*cking move on Dream's side. If anyone is confused on the why, it's because, once again, this is emotional manipulation pure and simple. Dream putting the baggage of getting better on Tommy and appealing at his empathic nature to keep him into this f*cking abusive relationship. And also he's doing this while clearly panicked and grasping as straws. Because he does know that Tommy is not going for it right now, it's very obvious.

It's just... slimy...

[kuekyuuq]

Gloria, Jet-lags and Imps [6x11]

Let’s jump right in:

Kinda love how Kara lamp-shaded addressed the fact she didn't tell the gang about her adventures in the PZ. She’s not wrong, tho.

...what do I want to say about Mxy using what's basically a well-known gay-anthem to tell his tale? I mean, it didn’t lead anywhere. The original song is about freeing oneself, liberation, stepping out of a (gone bad) relationship and moving on, stronger for it - empowerment. The only connection I could make, is that originally it was Nyxly’s aim to just do that (freeing herself and her kind from an oppressor), but in the way Mxy performed it, that part of the parallel was long over before he even reached the chorus. It’s also a popular Karaoke song, tho, so... he chose it because it’s catchy? I’ll try not to overthink it for now. At least, the Superfriend’s reactions were fun.

Nia exiting the elevator, "And what's this Old Stone?" I love it when ppl enter a room / situation and pick up on words that they couldn't have possibly heard. I think cinema sins ding such... Are we to assume, she dreamed Mxy's rendition of ‘I will survive’? Or is the elevator not sound-proof at all? (If it’s the latter, Nia later apparently telling Brainy “in private” between scenes / during the elevator ride about her Nyxly adventures, was a silly thing to do.)

So, "Jared" created the ring Old Stone to rule them all, it got shattered into the Paragons totems? Nyxly needs the totems and to get them she needs a crystal which also belonged to "Jared" - who happens to be Mxy's ancestor, which is why she needs Mxy / his blood, too.

I have one important and incredibly relevant question here, tho... 

With the introduced imps and their names... Why’s dude named Jared of all things?!

Really, did I mishear that? If so, I’ll leave it as is and never edit, bc that would be hilarious in its own right 😋

...

Not sure what to make about Supergirl paraphrasing a Dirty Dancing quote.  "Nobody puts Mxy into a power crystal on my watch."  ...is he Baby now? (Seriously, though: Which of the writers thought that was a fitting quote to use in that particular context?)

...now, is the exposition section of the episode over yet?

Sensitive Brainy sensed something was up with Nia. He can relate... Nia doubting Kara would understand, too, is ridiculous. But I get it... insecurities and all. But, I mean, just 5 minutes later Kara announces she wants to save Nyxly despite her wrongdoings. And yet Nia still remains convinced, Kara wouldn’t forgive her own personal mini-me... After having witnessed Kara forgiving Lena for a whole season of the writers being stupid messing up to the nth degree. But I digress, Lena’s Lena.

...how old is Nia meant to be again? Just asking out of completely unrelated curiosity.

F*ck. They really went with NewFoundland...

Imma assume it was an executive choice after realizing they couldn’t find enough actors and actresses with a convincing Irish accent... maybe. Again, no offense to Newfoundland! Just... we got the insinuations of Ireland, not Newfoundland... And truthfully, when I think of magic, Ireland is an easy association. Whereas I only due to this whole debacle learned Newfoundland has Irish ancestry. So, okay, the show forced me to learn something new... I give ‘em that.

An easy journey, she said.

Lena's been off-screen for two whole episodes, Kara announcing at the beginning of ‘Dreamweaver’ [6x09] Lena being “back east” (at least insinuating Lena’s left the west-coast already), which span over at least one full day (feat. a scene at night), and ‘I still rise’ [6x10] at least another a whole day (the whole Nia’s mom back for a day deal). And, now, after at least 48 hours she barely just arrived.

Lemme check how long a regular plane would need to fly from California to NFL......... ... .. .. So... approx. 10 hours with at least one layover. 

Yeah, using a private jet made it easier, but apparently also much, much slower...

Or, Lena randomly went some other places / did some sight-seeing in NFL before she decided to finally visit her mother’s hometown...  [Either that or the timelines don’t match up and Lena’s scenes are flashbacks of sorts.]

Optimistic and relaxed Lena is a sight to behold. I rewound 3 times, just to enjoy it for as long as possible. We all knew it was going to be short-lived... 

Let’s check off a few more items...

OMG, Kara hiding behind Alex at the mere sight of the PZ-projector broke my heart!  😢

"Elisabeth Walsh" is the new 'the one you shall not name'. ...poor Lena. 😭

Oh, so Mxy wants to be Patrick Swayze instead of Baby... gotcha.

...is this going anywhere?

KITTY!!! Okay, this must be the best opponent in the history of CWSG. 

Despite the horrible CGI, SG using her heat-vision to project a laser-beam to distract the cat had me in (happy-) tears! 🤣

Gotta love the civilians of National City quickly returning to business as usual once the giant cat is gone. Even the police officers looked rather chill...

Nyxly did look fabulous this episode ^^ 

Andrea being Lena's rock is both great and annoying. I can't fault Andrea. It's just, that we still have to see an on-screen interaction between Lena and Kara and that bugs the heck out of me. I can’t help it. I’m sorry, Andrea.

Nia: "...is my fault." Kara: "Nu, is MY fault!" J'onn: "Stop fighting, kids!" Space-dad has spoken.

Mxy used an LuthorCorp copy machine... and of cos it's faulty. It's not an L-Corp product.

Kara forgiving Nia came as a surprise to her... Oooookay. I mean, the show has been writing Kara a bit inconsistently the past two seasons... so, yeah, maybe being unsure which of her traits apply this week was not such a far stretch...

Maybe it's the hair, but I wished, Florence was played by Alex Kingston.

So, not-Alex-Kingston shows Lena herself with a funny wig and tells her how her mother was still watching her...

If it wasn't for Katie's acting skills (I love her.) I would have already hit my head against the wall repeatedly. Something about these scenes had me constantly cringe and I made it through 5.5 seasons of this show already... Can’t quite put my finger on it, but it was highly distracting from the story that explained Lena’s mom was special even to another witch, where there was domestic abuse, and an accidental murder. Y’know, important stuff, deep-cutting stuff! 

At least, poor widddle Lena got some closure there. Elisabeth was a good cookie. And filled with magic. And Lena’s gotta have that ‘spark’, too... 

....so... Lena’s gonna stay in NFL for how much longer, to train becoming a witch?  Please, just hand her a how-to manual and send her back home, to figure it out on her own, please... (Yes, that would be horrible decision-making, but I need her back with the team!)

On to the finish line: 

So... Mxy IS Nyxly's brother? Wait, that doesn’t sound right... then Nyxly would have the same blood... Did I miss something? Can someone explain, please? Or is he her ex, and that’s where his rendition of “I will survive” makes sense?

Hnn... I can't help, but think Kara's speech for Nyxly was 85% based on her experiences with Lena in s05.

Awww... he said "stronger together"... Mxy... I hope, you'll be okay!

Lena believes in magic now. And I absolutely love how Lena wants to science magic XD

...but apparently magic isn’t science that hasn’t been explained yet, but parallel... powers? concepts? ether strings?

Nyxly has a loyal henchman now. Which was a bit heavy-handed. Took way too much of screen-time, so it better leads to something interesting.

And Kara is on a warpath now. Wooooot! Girl’s got enough.

...what else? 

Did I miss a third Patrick Swayze hint / quote / mention?  I learned, these things come in threes... Y’know, basic writing rules... 

I guess, for once the episode title was meant to be taken literally, Mxy popping up between characters, to try and help. (I need in-show footage, of Mxy sneaking up on ppl, without his powers, on all fours / crouched, just to get the desired effect.) I mean, I’ve never really watched Malcom, but wasn’t he like what Mxy usually is? A bit of a trouble-maker, prankster, chaos-ensuing wherever he goes? ...well, in that case, the episode title didn’t hold up, as Mxy’s scenes were not fun or really goofy. Yes, there was some superficial humor, but just to serve Mxy dealing with not being able to use his powers, which in turn was only barely scratched at (although it turned out to be his final character development crisis, appreciating not having powers and - in turn - facing consequences for once). Again, a whole lot going on in the episode, so a lot of that may have ended up on the cutting-room floor.

...where’s Kelly? Secretly adopting a kid, maybe?

...Kara’s still a reporter, right? I mean, whenever it serves the immediate plot, yes? ...Not even a throw-away line, that she has to pop up at CatCo for appearances sake? Since Andrea is already upset with her AND looking into her friends’ identities? At least, Kara should take a peek to make sure Andrea hasn’t uncovered anything yet... No?

Well, that’s all I’ve got for now. Kue out.

[kacchanrawr]

Things I want to see in the future of MHA

(not just post-war stuff, but also the entire series. Some of these are kinda self-indulgent)

1. Endeavor and Hawks’ judgment

I honestly don’t know if I want to see them punished or pardoned. I’m interested in both of those so I’ll just trust Horikoshi on that one. But anyways, there’s no way they aren’t getting shit for this.

2. Whatever the ‘fake heroes’ are gonna do after this

Going back to Stain’s ideology about fake heroes. I agree with parts of it, there are a lot of people that become heroes without the conviction. They get into it by treating it the same way as any other office job, not as a mission to be well, heroes. But I don’t agree that they should be killed or eliminated. Being a hero for money isn’t inherently a bad thing, it’s when you let greed take over you to the point that you forget what it means to be a hero. Some of those ‘fake heroes’ like Mt. Lady who was originally in it for the fame and money have grown to become real heroes. Others who really have zero conviction, will probably quit after facing this amount of despair, like the guy in chapter 296.

3. The Todoroki family’s image

How will everyone else see the victims of the situation, Natsuo, Fuyumi, Rei and Shoto after this? Especially Shoto. Now that his past is out in the public, that will probably affect his future as a pro. Would his classmates and peers see him or treat him differently after this? Like out of pity or sympathy?

4. The public’s backlash in general

How will the public start viewing not just Endeavor, Hawks, and the Todoroki family, but all heroes? Will they lose faith in heroes? We know they kinda already are when UA had a lot of backlash when Bakugo was kidnapped. UA as well, will it get shut down?

5. Bakudeku’s talk

I don’t think their relationship is actually gonna stay the same after this whole ‘my body moved on its own because I care for you and wanted to save you so I just got stabbed and risked my life for you and even told you to stop trying to be so selfless and do everything by yourself’ thing. All Might also did foreshadow that they were gonna talk soon. Maybe we could get the long awaited Bakugo apology scene ? Though it feels way too soon. And if Hori feeds us Bakudekus even more I think we’re just gonna combust.

5. Deku’s character development

His mindset and view of the world will probably be way darker and even more serious after this. I also want to see how Bakugo getting hurt for his sake and saying “don’t play hero all by yourself” will affect him. We know that he has decided to become a hero that wouldn’t make anyone worry about him when he had a flashback of his mom crying and being worried for him. He decided that the solution to that is to be stronger, but now maybe he can learn that selflessness doesn’t necessarily mean that he has to carry all the weight by himself. But then there’s the 4th user’s quirk that will probably push him to be even more selfless.

6. Ochako’s development

Please please PLEASE let this girl have more development. The way her fight against Toga ended, and her seeing the grievous side of being a hero? Probably a set up for her development.

7. Basically the rest of the kids’ development?

Obviously it’s not just the people involved in the fight against Shigaraki, or Ochako that are gonna view the world differently after this. I wanna see how they will deal with this. Kirishima and Mina will probably be some of the highlights. Also Momo, since Midnight meant a lot to her when she was the one that trusted Momo to lead their classes in the battle against Gigantomachia.

8. Aizawa and Present Mic dealing with Midnight’s death

Those two are especially highlighted amongst all of the other UA staff members because they have a past with her, as shown in vigilantes. We saw their anger and sadness about Shirakumo, what more when it comes to Midnight?

9. The villains dealing with their losses

Yes, know Toga went on a rampage after Twice’s death, but how will she and deal with it in the long run? How about losing Mr. Compress? How will Shigaraki react to both of those, and having the other Paranormal Liberation Front members like Geten captured? Not just emotionally, but how about the loss in terms of strength and power?

10. Prison break arc

People have been talking about this for years, maybe ever since we knew All for One was only imprisoned and not killed. We’ll probably see it happen next chapter. Will it cause the public to lose even more faith in the hero system? How will it affect the villains? Will AFO be their boss now, or will they resist him and stay loyal to Shigaraki?

11. All for One vs Shigaraki

Related to the previous point. We know Shigaraki really doesn’t want AFO bossing him around. They’ll probably have a fight. Maybe Deku and Shigaraki vs AFO? Then they’ll go back to fighting each other once the common threat is gone. This doesn’t feel very likely, but it could be a way of interpreting Deku’s “you looked like you needed saving” at the end of chapter 295.

11. Deku’s arms?

I don’t know if I want him to lose them and get prosthetics, or get healed by Eri. It would be great to see him experience a major loss, but ability-wise and emotionally? Not so good for him, though that’s kinda the point. Also he might not be able to use OFA in his arms anymore and I kinda don’t wanna see that. Even if he can, will he be able to use it at 100%? So far, we’ve seen that the level of technology in MHA aren’t enough to withstand 100%

12. Deku mastering One for All

I wanna see him consistently use 100% without injuring himself. I want to see him do more with black whip, float and the fourth user’s quirk. I’m also curious about the other three quirks left.

13. Power buff for everyone else

I kinda don’t wanna see the MC getting so ahead of everyone else, to the point that they leave everyone else in the dust. But I know that it’s been established way earlier on that Deku will surpass everyone in terms of strength. Even now, Bakugo, one of the strongest in Class 1-A could barely catch up with 30% OFA. But from his internal dialogue in chapter 293, I’m guessing he already had a quirk evolution when he saw Deku at the verge of death. I want to see more details on that though.

14. Everyone else’s reaction to Bakugo’s sacrifice

It’s gonna be a big thing for his character and all, but I don’t think this is gonna happen because of well, everything else being a mess. But maybe at least All Might’s?

15. Deku’s father

I don’t want him to be a really big famous, important figure, or someone involved in this whole AFO vs OFA stuff. It will kinda ruin Deku’s character of like, ‘just an ordinary boy that was lucky and so his character arc is to be worthy of that blessing’. If Deku’s father was someone like that, that would mean he was the fated or chosen one in the first place anyways? But what else can Deku’s dad be? I honestly don’t know.

16. All Might’s death

I see so many people complain that he should’ve died in Kamino, but I disagree because saving that big moment for later was actually a good decision. We know he’s gonna die, he has death flags everywhere. But I wonder how exactly he will die, when he will die, and how big of an impact his death will have.

17. The final battle

As in, the last battle of the entire series. Deku vs Shigaraki rematch, Ochako vs Toga, Shoto vs Dabi. And for Bakugo, well...... he doesn’t really have a villain nemesis? (Huh maybe I’ll talk about that some other time) But the best I could think of right now is Bakugo and Deku vs Shigaraki, like in Heroes Rising. If the Heroes Rising ending was the original series ending, maybe Hori was hinting that Bakugo and Deku will be fighting the final boss together?

18. Bakugo and Deku as a hero duo

Related to the previous point. Shipping lenses aside, I think there’s plenty of foreshadowing for that? Even if they wouldn’t officially be hero partners, I’m guessing they’re both gonna be important pillars. “Win to save, save to win”

19. The ending

I want to see how they will fix the broken hero society. I want to see Class 1-A as wonderful heroes. I want satisfying closure for the villains as well. What I don’t want to see is everyone getting married and having kids like Naruto, and those kids being the characters for a sequel series. I’m sorry but as much as I like a lot of the ships, I think that’s probably one of the worst endings possible. But a next generation sequel actually wouldn’t be that bad if the main characters were the established kid characters we already know and love, Eri, Kota, Katsuma and Mahoro. We can see through them how the new hero system/society works, and maybe all the smaller subtle stuff that they still need to patch up. Other than that, I don’t think there’s anything else good about it.

20. Deku becoming the greatest hero

Also very much related to the previous point but I only remembered it afterwards. We know it’s gonna happen, but how? Also notice that while Bakugo always says ‘number one hero’, Deku always just says ‘greatest hero’, which kinda aren’t the same thing. Maybe it’s just cuz I’m a Bakugo stan, but I don’t think it’s a good idea to just let the rival characters be content with number two? Either ‘Bakugo is the number one in ranking while Deku is the greatest hero’, or ‘Deku is the greatest and number one hero but their rivalry hasn’t ended and it’s a push-pull’ thing. Or just kill one of them (cough Bakugo cough) and it’ll be fine.

21. Other people finding out about OFA

I don't think it's going to stay a secret between Deku, Bakugo and All Might anymore. At the very least, the people involved in the fight against Shigaraki, like Shoto, Aizawa and Endeavor should be given an explanation on why Shigaraki was targeting Deku in particular. At worst, it becomes public news and Deku will now have to deal with a much a greater pressure of everyone expecting him to take up All Might's mantle. I'd rather go with the former, but the latter is also interesting I guess. Or if not those, they'd have to come up with a really good excuse.

Anyways that’s all I can think of for now? There’s probably way more at the back of my head. I’ll just edit whenever.

[seagreen-meets-grey]

When Lightning Strikes Ch. 16

When your life is nothing but a cloudless sky, lightning can come and strike you so unexpectedly, you won’t even know what hit you.

Or: When Hiccup and Astrid meet, it is as if lightning strikes.

[Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5] [Chapter 6] [Chapter 7] [Chapter 8] [Chapter 9] [Chapter 10] [Chapter 11] [Chapter 12] [Chapter 13] [Chapter 14] [Chapter 15] [Chapter 17] [Chapter 18] [Chapter 19] [Chapter 20]

Crossposted on ao3 and ff.net

_______________

Hiccup regretted not going back for a jacket the minute the wind started blowing sideways. His hand hurt from gripping the handle of his umbrella, preventing it from succumbing to the forces of nature and escaping him like a gas-filled balloon. When it turned inside-out for the third time, he gave up and closed it, hunching his shoulders in an attempt to keep the rain from disappearing down his back. It only semi-worked. He could count the goosebumps on his skin. Soon, his t-shirt was clinging to his torso and he started rubbing his arms to stop shivering.

This had been a very stupid idea. Why had he not thought this through? Where was he even going? And why on earth had he not taken his car?! But turning around and walking back to his house sounded worse than to keep walking, because the way back was the direction the rain and wind were coming from. He started jogging to warm up and get out of this weather as fast as possible, taking the route to the nearest person he could think of.

With a trembling finger, he rang the doorbell, waiting for the familiar static. The first voice he could hear was that of a barking dog, then some swearing and yelling at the dog to shut up, then finally, someone addressed him. “Hello?”

“Hey man, it’s me. Can you let me in? I’m cold and wet.”

“That’s not what- Shut up, Hookfang! Sit! That’s not what your mom said last night.”

Hiccup let his forehead fall against the front door. “Just let me in, please.”

The sound that came out of the buzzer reminded him of a dying cow, but he was able to open the door anyway. At the top of the stairs, Snotlout was standing in the open apartment door, holding his excited dog by the collar. When it spotted Hiccup, it wagged its tail against its owner’s legs and barked happily.

“Come in before he barks up the whole stairwell again. Mr. Browner’s been sticking his head out the door every time we came back from a walk to complain if Hookfang made even the tiniest of sounds. And you know he’ll make the sound if he sees people.” Before he closed the door, he yelled down the stairs, “Yes, Mr. Browner, I’m talking about you, you massive dick!”

Hiccup scratched the happy dog, trying to escape its tongue. “Wouldn’t massive dick be a compliment in your book?”

“What?”

“Nothing. Do you have a jacket for me?”

“What do you need a jacket for?”

Hiccup wordlessly pointed first at his clothes, then out the next window. “Oh, come on…” Of course, in the few minutes he’d spent inside, the rain had let up. A small patch of cloud was even lighting up a little, as if about to expose a bit of sunshine.

“You walked through a car wash or what?”

“Why- why would I ever- No, it’s been raining for the past few hours, have you not looked outside lately?”

Snotlout flopped into his armchair where a set of headphones and a half-empty bag of chips were resting on each arm. “Nah, I was busy.”

Gently shoving Hookfang away from him so that he could move, Hiccup peaked at the TV screen. “Obviously.” He was looking at the pause menu of a Harry Potter Lego game. Snotlout quickly grabbed the remote and the screen went dark.

“This is Call of Duty. Shut up, Hiccup.”

“Clearly. I could still use a jacket, though.” Oh, he would use this newfound knowledge on a later occasion. When he had the right mind for it and wasn’t still feeling like a wet towel in winter.

With a groan, his friend got up and left to his bedroom. As soon as he was gone, Hookfang jumped onto the chair and stuck his nose into the bag of chips, licking the inside. Hiccup grimaced. Snotlout loved his dog, but he still had trouble making it listen to him. Or follow any rules at all. Lucky for him, Hiccup now knew an expert in all things dog training and– Oh, right. Said expert had also just kissed him, more or less, and then bolted.

She’d said she needed to go home. Maybe she’d meant her parents’ place? Maybe she hadn’t even been talking about anything regarding her relationship with her husband? Was he overthinking this again? Maybe… Maybe she’d forgotten she needed to meet her family, the equivalent of remembering the oven was still on. Or something. He sighed. It was a place to start.

He was hit in the head by a hoodie, followed by a yell from Snotlout. “Catch! Pff, loser.” Hiccup decided not to say anything when his friend reached into the bag of chips and ate a few, before inspecting his hand and scrunching up his face in disgust. “Ew, dog slobber! Hookfang, you shit dog!” The shit dog wasn’t impressed by its owner’s disgust, staying on the armchair without a care in the world. “Now get off my chair!”

When the dog didn’t move, Hiccup sharply whistled and pointed down at his feet with a stern face. “Hookfang, come here!” After a few moments of intense eye contact, Hookfang actually gave in and followed the command, lying down at Hiccup’s feet, much to Snotlout’s dismay.

“Hey! Why are you listening to him?! You betrayed me, you son of a bitch dog!”

“You know, technically, he is the son of a bitch.”

“Shut up, Hiccup. I need that jacket back by tonight.”

Hiccup took in the chipped flame print on the sleeves. The jacket itself was too wide for him, but the sleeves were way too short. He probably looked like an idiot. “What for?”

“I want to wear it to work tomorrow. There’s this girl that likes that stuff.”

“You mean oversized clothes for kids? Didn’t you wear this back in school?”

“It’s retro! Whatever, she digs it. So give it back later, okay? I really need it.”

He shrugged. “Sure. Thanks anyway. I bet you didn’t have any other jacket you could lend me.”

“I’m not gonna give you my fine stuff. You wouldn’t be able to handle the swag, anyway.”

“What swag, Snotlout?” Before his friend could dive into that age-old discussion again, Hiccup held up his hands to stop him. “Save it, I gotta go.”

“Where?”

“Uh, I don’t know. Bye, Snot. Hookfang, listen to Snotlout. Whatever. Thanks again for the help!”

He had grabbed his umbrella and was out the door before the dog could follow him or Snotlout could dig for more details. He didn’t have time for that right now. There was a place he needed to go and there was no time to waste. Realizing he could have asked for a ride, or at least for a short ride to his own car, he slapped his hand against his forehead, breaking into a jog.

Every few minutes, a short drizzle broke out of the clouds, and Hiccup felt taken back in time to a certain rainy November day. Time was of importance just like it had been then, but today, he was determined to catch her in time and not let go. Unless she wanted him to, which he hoped she didn’t, but now that he thought about it, maybe she needed to be away from him and concentrate on the relationship she wanted to keep. Winded, he slowed to a stop and leaned against a traffic light at an intersection. The next bus stop was just down the road.

Checking the schedule on the wall of the bus shelter, he sat down on the narrow bench underneath and waited. With a sigh of relief, he found his city ticket in his wallet. The hoodie and exercise had warmed him up enough and he made sure no water would drip out of his hair and run down his neck.

What if the roles were reversed this time? What if she – and he tried to not get his hopes up – had plunged deeper into this connection between them and now needed to sever all ties to him in order to not lose her mind? That he could relate to.

He got to his feet the moment the bus rounded the corner. If her decision really ended up to break contact, he would still find her and talk to her first. For his own attempt at closure, at least. He’d know he at least tried this time, and didn’t give up at the last minute because the mountains in his way were too steep to climb.

He had to change busses twice until he got out two streets over from her parents’ place. Using the short pause between drizzles, he made it to the driveway, eyes darting around in search for her car. It wasn’t there. His stomach dropped and he felt his heart beat in his throat as he walked to the front door and rang the bell. He would leave no stone unturned; he was all in.

The door opened and Wilma Hofferson curiously raised her eyebrows at the sight of him, disheveled and wet from the rain, wearing an unfitting hoodie.

“Hi,” he nervously greeted. “Is Astrid here, by any chance?”

Wilma shook her head. “Last I saw her she was leaving to meet someone for lunch earlier, I assumed it was you.”

“Oh.”

“Seems like I assumed wrong. Have you tried her phone?”

He could have slapped himself. Her phone. He could just call her, for fuck’s sake! “No- no, you were right, she was with me. But then she left and now I’m trying to find her, but seems like she went home home, so never mind. Sorry for bothering you!”

Mind already recalling her phone number, he left a bewildered Wilma behind and jogged back to the bus stop. He scanned the schedule, but he had no clue where he should go. He didn’t even know her address. Tapping his right foot on the ground in a quick pace, he tried to get his racing thoughts in order.

“Alright, Hiccup,” he mumbled to himself, “what’s the plan here? How can you solve this?”

Call her and ask for her address? No, that was stupid, and also inconvenient. He could just ask her to meet him somewhere.

Call her and talk on the phone? Also no. This was a conversation to have face to face.

Call Heather to ask Dagur for Eret’s number or address? Yeah. Great idea, Hiccup. Call your ex to ask her brother for your almost-lover’s husband’s number. Just call her yourself, you idiot.

But when he pulled out his phone and stared at her contact info, the knot in his stomach grew tighter. It all came down to this phone call. It was easy, actually. He just had to press call, wait for her to pick up, then convince her to meet him for a very important conversation.

He was frozen where he stood, the steady sound of rain on the bus shelter’s roof like white noise in his ears. His heart was pounding, growing bigger and bigger in his chest, pushing against his lungs until he felt like he couldn’t breathe. Ripping his gaze away from his phone, he took a few deep breaths and started walking, absentmindedly opening his umbrella.

His hand was clenched around his phone, the chipped corner of the screen digging the reminder into his skin that he was avoiding his task. It was just a call. A call he needed to make. But when he imagined her answering, his mind went blank. What was he supposed to say? How was he supposed to make sure he didn’t screw this up?

Confront your fear, he heard Dr. Mala’s voice inside his head. Examine it, analyze it, confront it. What’s the worst that could happen?

Well, for starters, he could stutter around for so long that she hung up on him. She could tell him she didn’t want to talk to him. She could ignore his call altogether.

He clenched his jaw in determination. Well, then he would try again! He would find a way to reach her, he would even make an ass of himself by showing up on her parents’ doorstep every day until she either talked to him or told him to fuck off. No more avoiding, no more hiding behind fears of rejection and hurt. That wouldn’t get him anywhere.

The phone was already pressed against his ear and signaling an outgoing call before he could drive himself mad by going over what exactly he would say. Sometimes, he just had to approach the dragon without the axe. Maybe it was friendly.

After twenty eternal seconds, he realized she wasn’t going to pick up. Before his mind could start making up ridiculous reasons for that, he firmly told himself to try again in exactly fifteen minutes. In the meantime, he would just walk around Berk in the rain in his friend’s hideous jacket, definitely failing at not preparing what exactly he would say when he tried her again. But if he already didn’t give a shit about his appearance, there was no way he would avoid the call anymore, either. And hey, if she told him she wouldn’t be friends with him anymore, for whatever reason, then at least he knew where he stood.

That didn’t stop him from drumming his fingers against his leg at every red traffic light, though, or keeping up a quick walking pace because he needed to dump his nervous energy somewhere. By the time his phone signaled him the fifteen minutes were up, he had to orient himself for a minute because he’d walked to a part of town he didn’t immediately recognize. But he decided it wasn’t important where he was right now, and pulled up Astrid’s number again.

His mind conjured up an image of Cam with that Shia LaBeouf video he liked to play in every situation. Just do it! Yeah, Heather’s boyfriend was truly something.

“Just do it,” he mumbled, repeating the sentence seven times in a row before he finally pressed the call button.

It rang.

And rang.

And rang.

Twenty seconds later, it was still ringing, but he didn’t give up this time. Either she picked up or he reached her voicemail.

When the signal suddenly disappeared, his breath caught in his throat. But the voice that appeared was automatic, asking him to leave a message. So he did.

“Hey… It’s me. Hiccup. I- I don’t- I’m just calling because…” He took a deep breath. “I need to talk to you. We need to talk. About… About everything. Like, earlier, when you, you know, left – I probably don’t need to remind you. You said you needed to go home, and I know you meant home to Eret because I was at your parents’ house and you weren’t there, so. Um.” He sighed and ran a hand over his face. He should have just texted her. Then he could have carefully constructed a coherent message instead of this all-over-the-place rambling.

“Like I said, I really have to talk to you. There is something I need to tell you, something I should have told you a long time ago, but I can’t do this over the phone, that would be… Can- can you just call me back? I don’t know where you live and you didn’t say when you would be back or what you were up to, and you’re not answering your phone, obviously, so.” His legs were moving on autopilot, crossing streets, rounding corners. The motion was like water that kept the mill running, namely his sanity. If he stopped walking, he would stop talking.

“You know, maybe I should just get to the point. We- we need to talk about us. I- I don’t know if it’s just me, but I feel like there’s something between us and… And maybe I’m way off here and misinterpreting– No. No, I actually don’t think that it’s just me, because today, you almost kissed me. I almost kissed you. And I need to know why, I need to know where we stand with each other, because… Because…” His lips kept moving, but no sound came out. A truck drove by him and honked. Hiccup winced and a switch went off in his brain.

“I’m in love with you,” he blurted out and his heart stopped for a few beats. “I’ve been in love with you since I met you and- and there’s nothing I can do about it. Believe me, I tried. Remember when I showed up at your wedding and told you we shouldn’t be friends? Yeah, that worked out well.” An awkward laugh escaped him. “I don’t know what you want, either from me or- or from yourself, or your- your husband… But I want to get out of this limbo of trying to forget you and falling back under your spell every time you so much as look at me. It’s like… It’s like you dropped an anchor in me and the tide buried it deeper and deeper in the sand – if that even makes any sense, I just– I can’t go on like this. If there is any chance you feel the same, please call me back. If not, if you’re going to take my advice and resolve things with Eret, then I’m happy for you. But I can’t be your friend anymore. I… I need a clear answer from you.”

Abruptly, his feet grinded to a halt in the middle of the sidewalk. Tires screeched behind him and a biker angrily cursed at him, but he didn’t even register it. “I guess… With you going home so fast, you probably decided to patch things up with your husband, and I guess that’s my answer. Or maybe not, what do I know, my judgement can’t be trusted, I once thought I’d be able to get over you. Anyway, when you hear this– Oh fuck, do you even check your voicemails? Well, if you do, just… Call. Or text. Um… Yeah. Bye.”

He ended the call and sunk to the ground underneath a lamp post, ignoring the unpleasant feeling of rain and dirt dampening his butt. Only when something cold ran down his back, did he notice it was still raining. He’d been so absorbed in his message that he hadn’t even noticed he’d been holding the umbrella askew, and now his left arm was soaked, the hand holding his phone cold and stiff. When he got back to his feet, he accidentally knocked it against the post and the device went flying, landing in a nearby puddle.

“Fuck.” Before the next pedestrian could step on it, he scrambled to get it back, infinitely glad he’d bought the waterproof version. But when he wiped it on Snotlout’s jacket and took a closer look, he groaned. There was a large crack zigzagging over the screen, and on first inspection, it looked like it went deeper than the protection glass. He tried to unlock it, but it didn’t react to his touch anymore. “Fuck!”

Great, now he had to find a repair store that was still open in Berk on a Sunday evening. Hopefully, he would be able to still accept incoming calls… He cursed his clumsiness with vigor. This was so typical. When – if – she tried to reach him now, she wouldn’t be able to. Maybe she’d leave him a voicemail asking him to call her back and they would find themselves stuck in an endless, vicious cycle.

Where the hell had he ended up, anyway? It looked like he was in a suburb, but none of the streets looked familiar to him, and when he pulled out his phone to check his location, he groaned. Right, smartphone not available. But if he could find a bus stop, he could make his way back into the city. Or he could go back to the Hoffersons and ask for a ride. That wouldn’t be awkward at all.

After a while of walking around and finally asking a passing dog-walker for directions, he found a bus stop and quickly scanned the schedule. He’d made it to the end of the route of the only bus line that even came out here. And it being Sunday, he was just lucky that the next bus would be here in no less than 52 minutes, because he had, of course, just missed the previous one. He could walk back, but that would take just as long, and also his feet hurt. These shoes weren’t made for long walks through puddles. At least it had stopped raining.

So he waited. And waited. And played around with his stupid phone for a while, but it just wouldn’t magically work again, no matter how much he begged it to. After 50 minutes of waiting, it suddenly started buzzing – and his heart climbed into his throat when he saw the caller ID. He tapped the screen frantically, but it was to no avail. His last resort was to try the lock button and hope it would accept the call, but instead, it did the exact opposite. Absolutely fucking awesome, now she probably thought he’d declined her call on purpose. And where was the damn bus?!

The calls kept coming in, but there was nothing he could do except stare at his phone in resignation and jiggle his legs nervously because the bus wasn’t coming. Fifteen minutes and four awkward short conversations with passing strangers later, he embraced the fact that no one would lend him their phone for a very quick call, or a text, anything. There was no way he would wait around for another hour.

Grabbing his umbrella and starting the journey in the direction he hoped would lead him back home, he glanced suspiciously at the dark line of clouds on the horizon. The sunset was beautiful, though. If only he could enjoy it.

Soon enough, it was pouring again. And the calls stopped.

[mimiri22-6]

I JUST FOUND OUT BEE AND PUPPYCAT HAD A SECOND SEASON! GUESS WHAT I JUST FINISHED WATCHING!

Oh my fucking god holy shit, my guys! This show. This fucking show. Where do I even start! First off

SPOILERS!!!!!!

YOU DO NOT WANT TO WALK INTO THIS SEASON, THIS SHOW, WITH SPOILERS! DO NOT FUCKING LOOK, THIS IS 1000% SPOILER TERRITORY!!!

So I will be taking the extra step of taking my laptop out, and continuing this on there(and after I wake up because it's 4am and I regret absolutely NONE of this whatsoever because, guys, I love this show with everything I have left to my being, I swear, I will die for a third season)

Warning: This is a long one.

OKOKOKOK! I know I know! It’s been uh...A Month since I first posted this! BUT I am Here Now and Ready!!! I am less than 10 seconds into the first episode of season 2 and I am already So Ready to relive this!!(Dream SMP has Nothing on this show, God I Love This Show Far Too Much!!!!!!)

...First ten minutes...I have So Much I want to say...Just-just a lot of love...

okokokokokokokokokok!!!!!! I think I know how I’m going to do this now! One bullet for each episode! Let’s see if I stick with it.

Gentle Touch

In the first episode we already get a big game changer for Bee and her development. Bee becoming more responsible as a favor for Deckard. He asks her to take care of his family while he’s at cooking school and we already see her doing this. Going out to the ocean with Weasley, going out of her comfort zone for people she’s practically family to, which is why we got the beginning flashback, once again going out of her comfort zone to stop Puppycat from punching kittens, And Finally, coming out from her nap cupboard to face Howl and help pay for bills by eating ugly food.

Little Fingers

Ooh, this one has foreshadowing dream sequence. I would say more about it if it had more significance, but it’s really just what happens to Bee in the last ep. This episode brings more of Bee being responsible, trying to take her phone away from Puppycat so he stops making bad purchases. This episode made me realize what Puppycat’s role is this season, the child. Or something among those lines. He’s the same as he was last season, but it seems/is a bit more exaggerated because Bee isn’t doing the same things anymore. She’s started to care about consequences. And speaking about consequences, Toast announces she’s pregnant while confirming that she’s been staying...in Cass’s room(?)...weird, but ok, and by Tim pointing and Merlin’s reaction, it’s Merlin’s...but also everyone else seemed like they thought they were the culprit and I don’t want to think about the implications of that....MOVING ON-OH WAIT, And Cardamon’s mom is spouting magic tears that messes with the plants, so there’s that.

Snow and Violets

I’m going to be honest, I’m not 100% sure what to put here and I’m loosing steam. (I’ve been awake since 3 am...) But I think I can put something. The situation with Mr. Cup is the definition of being haunted by your past. The guilt and regret of cheating in the past has made him lose his motivation to give it his all in racing because, what’s the point? Motivation and not caring was his norm, so he just stuck with it. Until Bee, and now he can be a rainbow and sleep with less guilt and regret on his conscience. The thing with the island rapidly changing could be one of three things. Something to do with the ship that  Is the island, a metaphor for change, or something really cool the creators just wanted.

Day off Work

Not Too much to note for this ep overall. Puppycat totally did do the ‘wrecking the house in search for the owner’ thing dogs do. Finally, a dog trait! Every time I see Cardamon now I just get sad cause he’s 7, and should Not be doing landlord stuff. Bee showing worry about how Cardamon’s mom is still asleep and being worried about Cardamon himself, I’m just glad someone’s noticing. I keep forgetting that some people haven’t watched the pilot so they don’t know about Puppycat being a Space Outlaw, so when he found all his stuff under the apartment I was less surprised and more excited. The two last things I want to say is I think it’s interesting/cool/intriguing how the Wizard family just takes every weird thing either in stride, unquestioningly, or ignorance. Just trying to pretend it didn’t happen so they don’t have to deal with it(other than Crispin, but he’s coming up). And the last thing I just want to bring to light is CARDAMON BEING SO CUTE IN THE LAST SCENE! JUST BEING A CHILD! AND LAUGHING WITH HIS DOG! ON A FUNNY CHAIR! I LOVE HIM YOUR HONOR AND I WILL PROTECT THAT SMILE WITH MY WHOLE BEING!!!

My Favorite

Note, Pretty Patrick is also The Mayor. Alright. It’s definitely been a few months and you can see the relationship between Howl and Bee has gotten better, not that it was too bad to begin with, just a bit less peeved on Howl’s end. The theme of Bee being responsible is brought into play again with the train station scene. Telling Puppycat to not hit and the way Puppycat was acting around Patrick. All little kid stuff. Which also kind of clashes with what I thought was Puppycat being older than Bee by a lot, I’m honestly slowly getting more and more confused exactly how I should perceive Puppycat. THE FIRST REAL LOOK AT THE HAND GUYS! I’m still not sure what their deals are, but they have a corpse on their hands and that is already the biggest red flag. I have a guess as to what/who they are in relation to Puppycat and, by acquaintance, Bee, but I could be wrong, but I also can’t think of any other people they may be. I’ll bring it back up either the next time we see them or at the end.

Did You Remember

Grampa Puppycat cares about his granddaughter a whole lot. Don’t @ me, their dynamic is more confusing than a moving maze...Now this episode, ooh boy, it feels like a lot, but in a minimal way? First off, Cardamon finally breaks down about the stress of being a 7 year old landlord and Bee takes care of him for the day. Big Sis Bee For The Win! DON’T @ ME I MAKE UP MY OWN FAMILY DYNAMICS!!! Kind of continuing from the first sentence, Puppycat and Bee love each other(I Stand By Platonically For Them) so much already, for them it’s been a little over a year considering Puppycat fell into Bee’s life before her last birthday and now they’re celebrating another one. And I must admit, I can not for the life of me figure out wtf the deal is with the tears. They have little shapes of recent events in them and they make plants weird/straight up just make life! Like, What Even Is That?! Also, Cardamon finally gets a good sleep.

Bird Friend

Ok, so we got more ship pieces, a most likely reason as to why Puppycat was Like That in the last few episodes of season 1 and has been goopy every now and again in this season. Apparently eating things he shouldn’t eat make him Extremely off model and goopy. More hands! But not the rest of them this time around. I wonder if Sticky’s hunt for all the birds has any significance other than showing us another piece. Puppycat breaking down and spilling a few secrets after stress eating off the floor and Bee immediately saying no to someone else telling her what’s wrong with Puppycat and letting him come to her first instead of forcing him is always such a good lesson to have. Also, Cass is into weirdly shaped shiny things.

Two Clown Noses

Ah, it’s this one. The one that Really throws a wrench into the Bee/Deckard ship. THEY’RE BOTH SO CUTE! I CAN’T CHOOSE!!! This entire episode is just Crispin and Bee hanging out with the added angst of the beginning ‘story’. This world is full of such amazingly crazy characters and Crispin’s backstory is one of those crazier ones. Bee and him Lived Together and Know Each Other, he knows she’s a robot! My only question is, what happened that they broke up? WAIT- DID THEY EVEN BREAK UP?! It would be weird if they weren’t because they were living together and then they decide to live separate again would make no sense. I think I just jumped to the weirdest conclusion...Anyway! How would Puppycat get sick? I feel like that was just another thing they added to create different dynamics. The beginning birthday thing and the conclusion felt so real even though the cause was something so out there that I feel like only animated shows like this could pass, but also I feel like someone out there has done something similar, so what do I know. Yeah, not much else about this episode, it was mostly just Bee/Crispin stuff and character stuff. Gosh they’re so cute...but so is Bee/Deckard. Being a multishipper is hard...

Funny Lying

RIGHT! THEY’RE CALLED THE WARLOCKS! THAT’S THE TITLE I WAS FORGETTING! Tim knows everyone’s secrets, comes with the perk of having a lot of time and not talking much, you observe everyone else while they think you’re doing something else. I know from experience. Eavesdropping is a specialty of mine. SHIT THIS IS THE ONE WHERE CASS GETS THE MESSAGE DISSING HER FOR FALLING FOR TOAST FROM A COWORKER! I caught those vibes during the first season, but then the first half of this season came along and I was forced to drop those vibes in favor of cannon because TOAST WAS PREGOS WITH ONE OF CASS’S BROTHER’S KIDS! I’m good at catching gay vibes in fictional worlds, but I’m shit in the real world, just like everything else. And the thing is, we don’t get Any kind of explanation/closure for the entire rest of the season! We see Toast totally shocked reaction, probably moments before she was going to sneak attack Cass, but froze upon seeing that text. AND WE GET NOTHING ABOUT THAT FOR THE REST OF THE SEASON! Anyway, that was only like 2 minutes into the ep, this is taking forever. We got more Bee being responsible for Cardamon and getting rid of the tears, but the biggest part of this episode is undoubtedly Puppycat’s scenes. We got him sinking to the bottom of the ocean and getting cradled by flowers created by the tears next to the ship. We find out he was bullied and ridiculed in school as a kid and his best friend(idk what else they would be counted as), Violet, convinced him to leave their planet after they accidently summon their ship, leaving Puppycat’s mother behind. seeing how he cried about leaving her she seems to have been a great caretaker and he loved her immensely. We get the scene of Bee’s dad as a baby/Very young child on a mission, giving a presentation, and finding the candy to be a source of energy by cracking it open. Making me think, ‘Is that Bee’s fuel source? If it is, how would not taking full doses for two years effect her?’ because in the first season she splits the candy in half to share with Puppycat and in this season she didn’t eat the candy at all. Makes me even more worried for the future knowing what state she’s in when this season ends. With the last flower fever dream/memory it seems that the princess that he fell in love with was the one to make the final move to turning him into a ‘monster.’ Don’t worry tho, Bee saved him from the bottom of the ocean 

Golden Eyes

(I’m getting more and more tired as this goes one. I started doing this at around 12 this morning and now it’s nearing 6 pm. I’m loosing it!) We got another birthday and it’s Howl’s this time, though it’s not really his episode. The fish are attracted to the wish crystals for some reason and one eats a bit of it to be ‘human’ for a day. I love how the fish hated being a human and Weasley didn’t even notice it was a date. I don’t know if it was or not, but ending on that was funny. We got the return of the major douche from the season 1 finally and a mention of Moully. 

Why Don’t You Help Me?

(I took a break between episodes, aka I went tf to sleep, because I was falling asleep at the table and not really processing everything enough for what I’m trying to do) Ok, so this is a day in the life of Cardamon episode with supposed parelles to the Warlocks. We start with the red one stuck and the others unwilling to help...and then they start drawing Puppycat’s face on the 5th one’s corpse and these guys just do not care that it’s a dead body that they supposedly killed themselves. In short, they have all my fear because they are uncaring about body counts. Cardamon still goes to school on top of being a self proclaimed landlord and gets made fun of for being responsible and tattling at every chance he gets. Something I just noticed too is, at first I just assumed he was finally getting tired after being an adult in a child’s body for who knows how long, but now I’m thinking if he’s supposed to be asleep with Violet, his mom, then the reason for him being so tired is being awake too long. It could most likely be both, too. Just like Cardamon, I have no idea what all the tears mean. In the most recent one was see Moully as the charm in the center. What’s the pattern with these? Again we see Bee being responsible and taking care of Cardamon, making sure he gets home safe, tucking him in, and pulling an all night favor so he can sleep and get to school in the morning. Speaking of that, I can’t say I like Cardamon’s teachers all that much. I could rant about them, but this is already long and they’re not worth it. My only real question is, why the hell are their clothes so ragged and dirty? Do they not know how to bathe? Just, WTF? (either that or they’re Really not trying to hide their *ahem* activities from the kids, which just makes me want to punch sense into them or something)

Now I’m Really Alone

MOULLY!!!! Sorry, I just love him a lot. From what I can put together, he’s some kind of gift giving being. Giving wishes, exchanging good deeds and quick favors for other good deeds and favors. Just being Really nice and wanting to help everyone he comes across. This episode makes me see so much in common between Bee and Moully. They both want to help even when they don’t know how. Making messes and finding ways clean up those messes out of guilt and the feeling of obligation. They both have lost things they need to pick up and the knowledge that they have all the time in the world because they’ve both been alive for so long. It keeps getting hinted, but now kind of confirmed, that the Wizard’s know Bee is Weird because they haven’t seen her age. Hell, seeing how she interacts with Cardamon she could have even baby sat them. So all the Wizard’s know she’s Weird and, supposedly, only Crispin knew she was a robot. That was until Deckard found out in the season 1 finally. Once again bringing up the point of people in the Wizard family finding something out and ignoring it and hiding it. In the season 1 finally, Tim asked Cass if Deckard wasn’t depressed anymore, practically saying that Deckard has some form of depression. Depression being a mental illness that runs in families, it wouldn’t be a stretch to assume that some other members of the family have similar problems. One of the things I remember depression doing is the person will see a problem and ignore it. Something that many people in this show do with the weirdness around them and the emotional states/situations of the other people in the show. This season is about finally seeing the thing you’ve been ignoring and doing something about it. And that’s what Bee’s been doing this season, taking charge and finally getting her junk out of the ocean and getting REALLY far out of her comfort zone. She HATES water and the ocean, but she’s diving in to take back what’s hers and cleaning up a mess. There’s A Lot to analyze with this episode, the similarities of Moully’s and Bee’s situations and personalities, Puppycat being the responsible one again for the long run of things, the tears and how the wish crystals work, and the state of multiple character’s minds. Ignorance is bliss until it isn’t.

I Won’t Leave You Alone

Ok, SO MANY NOTES! Which makes sense seeing how it’s the last episode. First off, THOSE WARLOCK BASTDARDS VIOLATED MOULLY AND IF THEY WERE REAL I WOULD THROTLE THEM TILL THEIR HEADS POPPED OFF!!! I am a very protective person when it comes to things I care about. And I’m going to say it here and now incase something comes up of it, Cooking Prince gives be Colorful Vibes, if you know what I mean. You don’t follow someone home and bother them when they don’t want to be bothered unless you’re Into into them. That’s all I’m saying and if nothing comes of it, I will drop it. I’m barely hanging onto it to begin with. So, last episode we watched one of three hands punching the other hands to let Moully go, and in this episode it’s confirmed that the day Moully was pulled through the void, the 5th warlock died. My theory with that is, the 5th one was against getting Puppycat in some way and retaliated by fighting them off of Moully and then the others retaliated by killing them in some way. And the tears in this episode didn’t give life to the corpse, but grew new life over top of it, the tears can’t bring the dead back. The ship gets put back together and we see Puppycat being pretty selfish again, bringing the ship online while Bee gets scooped trying to help Moully. He indirectly helped, but only after he got what he wanted. Cooking Prince, an outsider, brings up how everything going on on the island is Weird and Cass celebrates someone acknowledging it. Once again, bringing back the ‘ignorance is bliss until it’s not’ thing going on around here. Cardamon does more childish things this episode, making a wish and crying in his mother’s arms. He got to finally let go of his responsibilities and let it out until he passed out, and now he gets to sleep again. Moully and Bee are out of commission and the Wizard’s+Cooking Prince stay one the island/ship to be with Bee even though they are mostly confused about EVERYTHING going on rn. Bee has multiple Bees now while she’s out, and so, they go looking for Bee’s dad. I have a feeling he has at least some white hairs by now.

I remember watching this season for the first time. I remember I definitely cried at multiple points, but I can’t exactly remember what points now. I didn’t cry this time, I was too busy taking everything in and trying to put what little pieces I could find together. The first season was to get us used to this world and get comfortable for a chill ride, but then it smacks you in the face with something much bigger at the very end. This season was to make you pay more attention and to question your surroundings. It was also about the first steps to taking charge of your life. If Bee didn’t do all the responsible things she did this season, the warlocks would have probably gotten Puppycat while the island went to shambles. Actions have consequences and that’s what this was about. I believe next season is why ‘Lazy in Space’ was the title. The characters are going to be in space, looking for Bee’s dad, and will acknowledge all the weird things going on while developing, excuse the pun, in out of this world ways. 

I can’t wait for season 3.

[drabbles-of-writing]

Willow and Amity making up and becoming friends again. just the two either verbally, or nonverbally, putting the past behind them.

You bring this up & I am definitely writing it someday but I would also like to take this moment to direct your attention towards my main man Gus.

Once they mutually decide to try and put the past behind them & Amity starts to try and be a good person, they fall back into their old routine pretty easily, even with the added bonus of Luz. Granted, it’s not perfect. Amity has a fallback every now & again about showing off or being better and it doesn’t go well, but she always makes an effort to try and be better.

The whole wrench in the situation, however, is Gus.

Gus was friends with Willow for about three years at this point. He was there for a lot of Amity & her friends bullying, and heard a lot about Willow’s rants to him about how she and Amity used to be friends, and all her sorrow and anger at how she ditched her after all that.

And best friend Gus is supposed to believe that suddenly, after all the torment and tears, they were on better terms now because of one reveal in Willow’s head? Gus is a sweet kid, but he doesn’t forgive that easily.

There was a sort of interrogation period, where Gus was keeping an eye on Amity. He understood why she stopped being friends with Willow, but the bullying and blatant sneering were cruel. He had to deal with plenty of them, too.

Amity was on eggshells around him. She wanted Gus to like her, because, well, he was important to Luz and especially Willow. It was a bit of a difficultly tho, because he was 1. two years younger than her and 2. an absolute nerd. Amity was experienced with toddlers, but it would’ve been insulting to compare Gus to them. And there were no real ‘smart kids’ in her old group. Amelia (green-hair plant girl) was sort of a plant geek, but she barely talked about it. Gus was more of a nerd nerd.

So when Gus would bring up something he was interested in, Amity would have no way to relate to or understand it. She’d try to slide in something like “oh I heard about something kinda similar-” and give examples but then Gus would correct her and she’d be even more confused or feel insulted, even though Gus usually isn’t meaning to.

She figured she could try and relate to him about the illusion track, since both her older siblings were in it and she heard plenty about it from them. Gus (grudgingly) did show off some of his illusions, which straight-up impressed Amity. He was very good at realistic illusions, mainly of himself. Sure, Ed and Em were good themselves, but their illusions were more in the way of ‘so weird it distracts you’ sort of type, and they were also four years older than Gus.  And that was finally something they could bond on. Amity was genuinely interested in his illusions and thought they were great. Which, considering she was considered one of the cool kids and the fact Gus is a babey boy, helped his ego quite a bit (lord knows he doesn’t need it but it’s nice).

Gus was and always will be obsessed with humans, and Amity was quick to hear from Luz how willing he was to study with her at ungodly hours. She respected his hard work and offered him spells to sprinkle into his drinks to help keep him awake. Gus was hesitant for a while but eventually caved after passing out on the floor for the fifth time in a month.

Amity also heard from Gus’s rants to Willow & Luz about the situation with Mattholomule, and since she knows the family since they’re decently well-off, she was 100% willing to kick his teeth in. Willow, being sensible, suggested that Amity probably shouldn’t since she has to be on the down-low, but Amity, of course, had to bring up the fact that her twins had taught her in the ways of trickery every now and again. Gus’s need for petty revenge outweighed his distrust and he readily agreed. It involved a lot of illusions, a few abominations, and a near run-in with Bump, but they got their revenge on the brat. Amity had never seen Gus so ecstatic while in her presence and she became just as happy as him.

Of course, they did eventually have a talk. It was after one of Amity’s accidental relapses that almost ended with all of them getting flung into the ocean, and she had been sulking on the couch bc Willow had left soon after & she felt really bad about it. Gus hated being straightforward about stuff like this but he figured it was necessary. Amity wasn’t having a good time either, but she did admit she truly wanted to be friends with Gus. He seemed like a good kid and, well, honest. Brutal honesty was something Amity wasn’t used to and she respected it, figuring she probably needed more of it in her life. Gus also admitted he did want to try and be friends with Amity. He told her how shook Willow had been when she recounted everything to him and that she seemed almost excited at the thought of being friends with Amity again, after some change, obviously. And Luz seemed to really like her, too. If she meant that much to his two best friends, he figured there must be something good about her.

It’s a long night after that, but at least the two had some closure with each other. Amity made it up to the others eventually, and her relapses slowly ceased to exist. With their departure came the intrusion Gus himself. Once he finally decided to give Amity a chance, he went all in. One simply cannot escape Gus once he’s latched onto you. Info-dumps, flags, minor tea he didn’t mean to spill because he didn’t realize it was tea, the whole Sha bam.

Which is overwhelming but also really cool for Amity?? Yeah Luz is also pretty excited about most things but that’s different. Luz talks about anything she finds interesting while Gus info-dumps on specific things, and has bits of knowledge in there he wants to share with her. Luz is seeking things to learn, Gus is giving back what he’s already knew.

Honestly, Willow is just glad they managed to get along. She didn’t need to deal with Amity’s crush and Gus’s interrogation.

[magpiejay1234]

Defeated the main storyline with Zeromus, now I got stuck at Lunar Ruins because I missed the save point. Oh well. Further thoughts on FF4 GBA

*Cave of Trials is definitely a later addition, not because it literally is an addiiton for this version of the game, but it is also antithetical to the Sakaguchi approach. Not the bosses for the ultimate-ish weapons of the additional player characters. Specifically, there are 7 levels of this dungeon. In all other dungeons in the original version of the game, you only have 5-6 at the very worst, except for the Lunar dungeons.

Nonetheless, it was very enjoyable, and I managed to grind better here than on Lunar surface, which was quite harsh. I still used the “canonical” party of Edge, Kain, Rydia, Cecil and Rosa because the IGN walkthrough recommeded it as such, though.

*Of all of the ultimate-ish weapons, the one that surprised me most was Triton’s Dagger. I didn’t know Palom could use daggers, though considering both FFI Ninjas and Edge can use Black Magic, it makes sense.

The Triton part of the dagger is also interesting since Palom cannot use water magic, but it is meant to reference his final scene with an unnamed girl (Leonora, according to the After Years). Of course the After Years made them a couple essentially, of course.

*It feels weird to see King Giott and Luca in both the Mysidia Tower and the final celebration for Cecil’s wedding. Other NPCs, particularly those in Troia don’t show up. Granted, Luca will eventually become an actual playable character in The After Years, but it is interesting to see how SE decided to squeeze the ending for more creating more content. Again, very anti-Sakaguchi, but also very Pokémon/Digimon/Yu-Gi-Oh!.

*And Zemus, as many people pointed out, you either believe he is a Diablus ex Machina, or a moral anvil to hammer in the “Fascism is bad” theme. Granted, for a JRPG series, FF’s anti-fascistic streak is actually unique, since most other Japanese media tends to be very pro-fash (you can look around Tumblr to see why, or just read early AoT criticism).

I’m more weirded out by his design. He doesn’t have legs, and according to the Yoshitaka Amano artwork of Fusoya, neither does he. But in the DS version, Kluya clearly does. From what I can understand, the Lunarians in the original game were meant to be more like a mixture of Asian dragons and comets, and both Fusoya and Zemus fit the bill. But Kluya is just a dude with animé blue hair.

Speaking of Kluya, the original translation seems to imply Kluya has been on earth for at least a few centuries, and having many progeny. But in the DS version, it is implied he had a traditional marriage with Cecilia, and only two kids, after centuries of wandering. I’m not sure if I like this later reinterpretation, because it makes me feel Kluya only found value in humanity after finding a chick who looks like a Lunarian. IDK.

*Going with the crystal retcon in The After Years, the Lunar crystals have not only kept Zemus at bay for so long, but they also actively help your party. So yeah, I don’t think the retcon works as well as I previously thought it did.

*The game obviously has a lot of Judeo-Christian symbolism in addition to the Star Wars references. Some of these are clearly deliberate. Others are NGE-levels of visual and textual flair. I planned to do a deep dive ages ago, but there might be a lot missing stuff from the later versions I might miss. So if I do a post like that, it will be less of a compendium and more of an overview.

*For the endings of each character:

**Tellah surprisingly shows up at the final battle, which wasn’t something I expected. The final battle overall obviously inspired the final battle against Giygas with all characters praying for your success and recovering your party.

*Edward actually lives up to being a good king after his father’s death. Edge doesn’t, because he is very horny. 

*Yang being the King of Fabul after the king’s abdication feels weird, because I don’t think it was set up really well.

*Cid is still stuck at Baron. I thought he would be a bridge between Dwarves and regular people, but I guess the dwarves already have the village of Agart. I didn’t notice that he was the best man in Rosa and Cecil’s wedding, which is cute.

*Porom is the one that instigates people in Mysidia to pray for Cecil and the gang, which is interesting. I guess Sakaguchi and Takashi Togita (co-writer of the game) really liked the character. 

Palom, as mentioned above, becomes a chad at the age of 5 somehow (Leonora at the point of this game is apparently 7, even though her sprite is clearly shorter. Again, Palom is a chad.) With him, I always think of him as a Bumblebee-type character, a character designed for the younger children in the audience to relate to. Games after FFIV would keep this tradition, but it feels weird to see here since Palom would become an edgelord like Edge in The After Years (despite technically following on Tellah’s footsteps.)

*Rydia remains with her new adoptive family. But I feel weirded out by Leviathan’s comments regarding Rydia’s beauty. This wouldn’t pass by censors in this day and age.

*Of course, Cecil and Theodor’s(aka. Golbez) closures are meant to parallel Kluya and Fusoya. Theodor ultimately decides to go into cryogonic sleep with his uncle (The After Years would put a kibosh on that, though), and Cecil takes on his biological father’s morals while taking his adoptive father’s role as the King of Baron. Symbolism aside, I really like this. Cecil was a character in need of a cause, and Theodor was a character in need of a connection with his past. 

Not to mention, if he decides to return after the all the shit he done under Zemus’s influence, he will be crucified by at least 50 people. So there’s that as well.

*I’m still stuck at Lunar Ruins, but I really like the face on the moon joke. Speaking of the moon, I wonder if the humanoid enemies in the Lunar Subterrane inspired the Maenad in the After Years. Anyway, that’s for another time.

[homeformyheart]

until now - m!raleigh carrera x mc (plat)

author’s note: trying my hand at a shorter piece and for platinum – there will probably be at least one follow-up to this but both will stay as one-shots.

copyright: all characters owned by pixelberry studios. songs and lyrics owned by their respective creators. series/pairing: platinum – raleigh carrera x mc (cadence dorian); mentions of jessica clark (red carpet diaries mc) rating/warnings: 13+; swearing, infidelity, angst word count: 1.7k based on/prompt: “should’ve said no” by taylor swift summary: raleigh gets too drunk and too close to a fan and the only real relationship he’s ever had falls apart.

until now

cadence could recall exactly where she was the moment r&b’s timebomb blew up the internet. she couldn’t recall with detail how she felt or how she reacted in that immediate moment but she could describe the exact shade of brown from her morning latte that stained the open page of her notebook because she stared at it for a solid five minutes after the headlines broke. she was working on a new single for her upcoming album that needed an angsty, heartbreak vibe to balance the upbeat, love-focused songs she had already written. she had a few lines written (it’s strange to think the songs we used to sing / the smiles, the flowers, everything) but had been struggling with motivation to come up with anything more – after all, she hadn’t been heartbroken in a while.

she was happy in her relationship with raleigh and where she was in her career. her first world tour had been a huge success, with raleigh joining her on tour as often as he could. after her tour was over, he insisted he didn’t want to wake up in his apartment without her and it didn’t take long before cadence moved into his penthouse. a few months later, she was able to join raleigh for the beginning of his transformation world tour, his first album since deciding he could embrace the things he enjoyed from his sunset skatepark days, making it his most personal project to date. of course, whenever the music and obligations to the studio called her back to new york, they facetimed as much as they could.

dating cadence had given raleigh some of the “good boyfriend” brownie points with the public related to loyalty and affection. it helped that cadence defended him against unfair accusations and doubled down on how well he treated her to the media and their fans. and no matter what part of his reputation was theme-of-the-week over at the tabloids – shameless flirt, heartbreaker, wild card, adrenaline junkie, to name the popular ones – raleigh never gave anyone a reason to label him as a cheater and more importantly, never gave cadence any reason not to trust him. even in his fake relationships, raleigh made sure that that part of his reputation was sterling. until now.

her phone had buzzed non-stop when the news broke – to the point where she thought she was getting phone calls that sounded like a ticking time bomb but they were mostly texts and social media notifications. the headlines filled her feed one after another – “raleigh carerra cheats on cadence dorian!” “did ralence break-up?” “was cadence too boring for raleigh?” “cadence drives raleigh into arms of another woman!” – along with hundreds of theories painted by devastated and thirsty fans alike who picked apart every public appearance, interaction, social media post, and song lyric associated with the two of them for the past six months as if they could find incriminating clues and signs of a slowly fizzling relationship like amateur sleuths. cadence had to give them props – it’s not like she wouldn’t eventually do the same once she was ready to process the relationship; in some ways, the fans gave her a head start.

how was she supposed to react to this right now? the photos and videos definitely highlighted that sabrina simmons, who cadence vaguely recognized as a media-hungry and wannabe actress from one of raleigh’s older music videos, cozying up to and grinding on raleigh at a club in london, presumably the afterparty for the closing night of his tour. cadence could also point out every tell-tale sign that raleigh was drunk out of his mind; he was relishing in the attention from sabrina and being inappropriately handsy for someone in a well-known, committed relationship. what most people didn’t know, was that cadence could forgive that – raleigh was normally flirty and handsy and alcohol always exacerbated it. what she didn’t think she could forgive was the next thing she saw – or rather heard.

if cadence felt like she was close to either having a raging smash-everything-breakable-in-raleigh’s-apartment spree or an emotional-because-her-heart-was-actually-breaking meltdown, the audio clip that hit her inbox pushed her to the teetering edge of both. the recording was barely 15 seconds long but it was damning. given the circumstances, it was probably planted or planned by sabrina who wanted to catapult herself into internet fame by taking advantage of raleigh’s reputation. her voice could be heard asking him if he wanted to come back to her hotel room. the question didn’t matter to cadence though, because raleigh’s response – “fuck yes” – was clear as day and cadence knew it would haunt her for months to come.

[jessica: just saw the videos – u ok? i’m heading home to iowa for a break from work, come stay with me, no one will find you there]

cadence quickly typed out a text reply, grateful for the close friendship she had with jessica clarke, the actress-turned-director who directed the music video for her last single. there was only one call she needed to make. if anyone was already putting things in motion, it was fiona. right on cue, she picked up and before cadence could say two words, said, “i’m so sorry cadence. i’ve already got movers on the other line and hank’s on his way.”

“thanks fiona. i’m going to stay with jessica in iowa and lay low for a bit. raleigh is not allowed to find out where i am; i will get a new phone if i need to,” cadence said, calmly starting to pull out and sort her things from raleigh’s closet so the movers would know exactly what to pack while she ironed out a few more details with fiona.

raleigh was still way too drunk when his manager barged into his hotel room and forced him into the shower. he was very drunk when his security team had to half-drag him all the way to where the private jet was waiting at the airport. he was mostly drunk throughout the eight-hour flight back to new york and progressed to staggeringly hungover by the time he was in a private car heading back to his penthouse apartment. once raleigh felt like he was only massively hungover, he pulled out his phone to text cadence. he became only mostly hungover after seeing that his texts weren’t going through. in a matter of seconds, his now slightly hungover state took a backseat to the anxiety filling his stomach as he tried calling to no avail. he frowned as he opened his news feed. the headlines alone made his eyes widen but the videos were what sobered him up the rest of the way.

a new email in his inbox from cadence caught his eye. it was an audio clip and a straightforward message: just so we’re clear, our relationship is over.

cadence was halfway to the airport when she saw the incoming call from an unknown number. she knew it was probably raleigh since she had blocked his number, but she answered the call anyway. she knew she was going to need the closure, may as well get it out of the way.

“cadence? it’s me, please don’t hang up. i’m so sorry, babe. i have no idea what happened, believe me. i woke up in my own hotel room alone, i promise,” raleigh begged, the pit in his stomach had lodged itself in his throat, threatening to turn into tears.

she chose to ignore what he just said. if she let herself pull at that thread and dig into it further to see if it was the truth, she’d never be able to end things cleanly. “tell me this – was she worth it? was she worth this?” she asked, her voice hardened as a reminder to both herself and raleigh that he couldn’t sweet talk his way out of this one.

“of course not. i was black out drunk and don’t remember anything, i swear. all of the stuff in the videos and photos, it was all just—” raleigh’s voice softened, “a moment of weakness.”

“that’s convenient since i’m pretty sure this wasn’t an isolated moment,” cadence said in a clipped tone, examining her worn nail beds. she made a mental note to ask jessica for salon recommendations in her hometown. “do you honestly expect me to believe we could ever be the same?”

“i love you, cadence. i would never cheat on you, babe – you have to believe me,” raleigh pleaded, swallowing his pride at the fact that he was begging right now.

cadence let out a dry, humorless laugh. “i don’t have to do anything, those recordings speak for themselves. you should’ve known that what you did with her would get back to me. and you know what i think? you knew what you were doing. you actually had everything you could’ve ever wanted – the fame, fortune, and creative freedom that comes with success in this industry and something real with someone who cares about the real you, not the curated, fake version of you.”

she paused to take a deep breath and blink back the tears pooling in the corner of her eyes. keep it together, cadence, she told herself. “and it scared the shit out of you, didn’t it? it got too real for you because having something real and precious as love in your life also means you could lose it too. and even the thought of that happening made you feel so vulnerable that instead of treasuring and protecting it you decided to utterly destroy the only real relationship you’ve ever had. congratulations – you’ve perfected your bad boy reputation and collected the last trophy you needed, cheater.”

her words cut right through him. “i— i’m so sorry, cadence,” raleigh whispered into the phone. “i swear, i don’t remember saying yes to her or even doing anything with her. please just, tell me what i need to do to fix this.”

the audio recording replayed on loop in cadence’s mind. after a long pause, she whispered back, “you should’ve said no.” the finality of cadence’s tone was punctuated by the beep from his phone indicating she had hung up.

raleigh stood up from the couch where he had sat while on the phone with cadence. as he walked toward the bathroom, he finally looked around his apartment and realized that all of her stuff was gone. the apartment was empty, quiet, almost sterile with its clear surface areas and shiny, clean floors. it was like she had never lived here; his closet didn’t have the hint of jasmine from the perfume on her clothes, his sink counter was devoid of her jewelry and makeup, his music room wasn’t drowning in loose sheets of paper covered in her handwriting, and worst of all, the clothes she always borrowed of his, including his oversized tour shirts and sweatpants, were folded neatly on his bed.

he reached into the back corner of his closet, the side closest to the door, where no one ever stored or looked for anything until he found his gym bag. his felt around the old shirts in the bag until his fingers wrapped around a small, velvet box. he didn’t have to open it to recall the vivid five-carat emerald-cut diamond ring he had planned on proposing to cadence with. he held the box against his forehead, hand clenched around it, before throwing it as hard as he could out the bedroom door into the living room, twisting and turning his body from a crouching to an upright position in one smooth motion. maybe he should’ve been a baseball pitcher instead. it hit the far wall with a resounding thud.

the echo reverberated throughout his living room until it was met with silence, once again reminding him that he was utterly alone. and for the first time in a very long time, he cried. raleigh carrera had never been heartbroken before. until now.

* * * * * mentions: @raleigh-edward; @dulceghernandez; @thegreentwin; @kat-tia801; @otherworldlypresents; @brycesgirl; @robintora;

[amwritingmeta]

hey! i was just wondering if you think spn will actually make destiel canon by the finale? it seems like in interviews they're trying to let us down gently w/a cas death (which possibly makes it seem like cas's ending might be related to his empty deal?) + all the parallels between saileen and deancas, and it looks like dabb and co (while not rly bringing arcs into conclusion and generally making a mess of spn) are fighting to make it canon, i was wondering what ur take on it was, esp after ep09

Oh, my dear, my heart is swelling with love for those two right now. I just watched the show through from 12x19-15x13 and I swear, that moment they share in 15x12, clinking those glasses and sharing all those smiles was like balm. It’s not even five minutes of screen time, and still it was like, okay, yes, good, thank you for the room to breathe. :D

It seems to be that Cas hearing Dean’s prayer has ushered in some much earned peace between them. They’re shown to be on the same page and taking each other’s side unquestionably. Dean trusting Cas’ judgment regarding Jack without pause. And that’s a good word for it: there’s trust between them, mutual respect, understanding. It’s so lovely, isn’t it?

So, there’s this line that’s sort of stuck with me. Actually, there are two things that have stuck with me (apart from all the gorgeous symbology baked into every episode) and it’s that the word “complete” has been mentioned twice.

Once in reference to Mary in Heaven, and once by Amara in reference to God.

Then we have a line that’s recurred twice: I had to die to get what I want.

The fact that its spoken verbatim twice made my antennas perk up a bit. It may mean nothing, as some things in this narrative sometimes do mean nothing, but it’s still interesting to take these things into account: that we’re searching for completion and that sometimes, in order to get what you want, you have to die.

So. Will Cas die?

I don’t think so. I don’t think so for many reasons that I’ve laid out here (I just posted this) (it was like you read my mind that this was coming today), but foremost because I cannot see how him dying does anything for his character arc, or for his joint journey with Dean.

You know, dark!Kaia (Kaia’s Shadow) going back to the Bad Place (Kaia’s unconscious) and accepting the ending waiting there, releasing our!Kaia back to the world where she belongs, makes me think, more than ever, that the integration of the main character’s Shadows are a necessity. 

The Empty, way I see it, is representative of Cas’ Shadow, his unconscious, all the repressed and suppressed emotions of guilt, shame and doubt that has kept his self-worth down until Jack came on the scene. 

And this is just my reading of this situation, but I’m not sure I can see Cas defeating the Empty in the Empty, if you know what I mean? The last time Cas intruded, the Empty made him suffer greatly. I don’t think Cas holds any sway there, nor should he. 

To me, the weapon our conscious has against our unconscious ruling our decisions, is our ability to grow aware of our own impulses, our own thought patterns, and making choices to break away from them.

I think Cas can only beat the Empty through making a choice and, well, for a long time I’ve felt that choice should be to become human, because by making a final choice of who he is and who he wants to be, he brings himself into awareness, integrating his Shadow in the process, and narratively nullifying the Empty’s hold on him, since humans don’t go to the Empty when they die: they go to Heaven. 

But that’s wishing and hoping and speculation, of course.

Here’s where the Destiel question comes in though.

Do I believe they’ll make it canon?

Personally, I can’t think of anything more a part of our story than the love story between those two, but I know what you mean. You mean a representative, tangible, clear, statement type of making it canon. Textualising it, so that there’s no room for doubt whatsoever. No more arguments, no more queer baiting complaints, just Destiel in plain sight. Undeniable. 

I do and I don’t.

Watching these last few seasons through again made me realise what a different feel to them this last season has, because the emotional stakes for Dean and Cas have everything to do with what they mean to each other. Yeah?

Dean taking his anger out on Cas and it pushing Cas into a turning point where he chose to leave, to move on, which was a moment of clear independence a statement of his sense of self-worth, and it in turn pushing Dean into a turning point where he faced a side to himself that he’s needed to name since forever, admitting to not having any control of himself, which is something he has to acknowledge if he’s to move into trusting himself fully, all of this has been gosh darn breathtaking to get to witness.

And having them land back in this ease, where they work together seamlessly as a team, being kept together more than not, the framing of them, all of this makes me feel like they could give us canon Destiel. I’m not going to say they absolutely won’t. 

I believe the writers want it. I believe the actors want it. But, again, that’s just what I take from the narrative itself, because the subtext is stronger than ever this final season. 

Especially with Sam and Eileen being reunited.

Because it’s been that clear parallel you mentioned, but it’s been that clear parallel to those of us who see it. The echoes of the Saileen romance that trace through the Destiel progression won’t be as resounding to those that don’t.

And because of that, at this point, I also feel quite reserved with my belief that Destiel could become canon. Because there’s so much, but there’s also nothing. There’s so much for us to enjoy, there’s so much evidence they keep throwing at us that the writers support this reading of their story, but still, there’s nothing, really, to let on that they’re building towards these two men, at some point, declaring their love for each other.

There has been zero textual foreshadowing of that.

There have been throw away moments, like the cop flirting with Dean, for example, but he frowned at that, and then got sincerely flirted with by a woman, so that deescalated that very quickly. 

There was Dean at first rejecting Garth’s compliment of “You smell SO good”, becoming uncomfortable, to then, by the end of the ep, tell Garth he didn’t smell half-bad either.

And there was that amazing moment with Cas calling out Sam being “sexually intimate” with Ruby and Dean repeating the words as if he can’t believe Cas even knows how to pronounce them.

So, there’s... you know, stuff?

But it’s not foreshadowing if it can be overlooked by the wider audience.

That said.

This show isn’t about this love story of ours. The fact that it’s so downplayed could mean that what we’ll get is something textual, but extremely subtle. I mean, for me, lingering eye-contact and a shared smile in a context that makes us understand they’re choosing each other would be enough.

If, by canon, you mean do I think we’ll get them kissing, then the answer is I want to believe that we might get that, because they could build towards that on the foundation of ease and trust that they’ve put down over the last few episodes and they could build it effectively, but I just don’t know if the studio (who own the characters) is onboard. 

My hope is that they are, because the topic of healthy representation is so hot right now, and the question of the longevity of Supernatural to the younger generations (you know, you young ones who are proving exceedingly more open-minded and looking for something beyond the superficial brothers-hunting-monsters aspect of the show) would bank on the show opening itself up to the possibilities of solid representation already seeded throughout its run.

But Dean has flirted with more women than men this season. You know? I mean, he hasn’t flirted with any men. So. 

Look, I’m not going to say I don’t think we’ll get it, because I don’t know. 

I watched S15 yesterday and finished it today and suddenly I feel this wave of hope that it actually might happen, because they’ve already changed how Dean and Cas interact, they’ve given them so many scenes with just the two of them, and we have Sam clearly meant to end up with Eileen, and doesn’t Dean and Cas deserve that same happiness? That same sense of completion? That internal peace of loving unconditionally and being loved in return?

Sam and Eileen could be foreshadowing. These writers are subtle and they could be gleefully rubbing their hands together at the thought of springing textual Destiel on the GA, you know? The green light from the studio might make them diabolical. *sadism* And I love that thought.

Because that’s been the point of the love story for me, this slow, slow build to the moment when Dean and Cas have reached a point in their progression when what they’ll have together is a healthy, balanced, loving relationship because they’ve both let go of the past and are looking to the future.

But I won’t expect textual Destiel. If we do get it, I’m going to treasure it as a big cherry on top of an already perfectly inviting and exquisite pie.

What I do believe, more than ever, that we’re getting, though, is closure. Even if it’s only at the subtextual level, I believe that those of us who read the subtext will have Destiel verified beyond a shadow of a doubt. And yes, I will be quite surprised and disappointed if we don’t get that. Because of how these first 13 episodes have been shaped and how strong the subtext is in them.

I believe we’ll end on a hopeful note.

And wouldn’t that just be gratifyingly phenomenal?

(it really would) (honestly I just need to know that they are happy and alive and together and well and finding peace and carrying on) (you know?) (thank you and amen) :)

xx

[casually-inlove]

Hello. In one of your responses, you wrote: "I also have things that I don't necessarily agree with." Can you tell us about it? I am very interested in your representation of this manhua. What do you think is written well in the story, and what is not? What would you add or remove? What is missing and what is too much in history? I would very much like to know your TianShan headcanon. I have too many "wants". I'm sorry if I was rude.

Dear anon, this was not rude at all. Indeed, you have many questions, so much as I try to be concise in my posts, this one is going to be very lengthy. Let me start with a little disclaimer. Everything below is entirely subjective. It is in no way meant to undermine anyone's enjoyment of the series, nor is it supposed to be an attack against the author. I value the comic's episodic nature and light-heartedness myself, otherwise, I would not have stuck around. It is also true that for the past half a year my interest in it waxes and wanes. Besides, I am well aware that certain groups of fans grow dissatisfied with the manhua direction. That said, I must state once again, OX has every right to write the story as they please, while the fans, no matter how displeased they may be, do not have the room to make demands of the author. So then, without further ado, some of my quibblings follow below. Beware of the wall-of-text.

1) The plot and characters get stagnant at times — these two go hand in hand. I suppose it is a prevalent gripe with 19 Days, and I am sure everyone has experienced it at least once. Some of it stems from the very way the story is told: the manhua timeline moves slowly in comparison with the readers' timeline. It works for depicting slow-burn relationships and subtle changes in the characters' outlooks. The problem is, more often than not, the latest chapters are inconsequential to either plot or character growth. They do not have the substance or the conflict to them. When OX had introduced the characters, while undoubtedly charming and loveable, they were practically walking tropes. Jian Yi, the bubbly airhead. ZZX, the stoic childhood friend. HT, Mr Popular. As time passed, OX did the clever (and the right) thing — they have subverted these stereotypes, by showing us that the characters are not who they appear to be. Thus, we learned that Jian Yi is a lonesome, affection deprived kid who on occasion dreads going back home because it's empty; his bright grin is there to hide his sadness.  We also learned that HT had a dysfunctional family and had been exposed to violence since a tender age; we also learned that he used to lead an empty life devoid of close interpersonal connections and passions, etc. I am not going to write about Mo because it is obvious and self-explanatory.

That sudden change in the perspective is what made those characters fascinating. A few of these developments co-occur with the addition of the “darker” mafia/gangster subplot. Indeed, the introduction of the criminal legacy theme (which is true for Jian Yi, He Tian, and Mo to an extent) allowed to show the wounds and troubles these characters had to face. It also dangled the prospect of an intriguing plot direction — a mafia-related story that is disguised as a school-themed slice-of-life. It was the underlying gangster plot-line that hooked me up; I kept asking myself: Are they connected (the Jian family, the He family)? Were they responsible for what happened with the Mo family restaurant? Will their backgrounds converge at some point? How does Jia Yi's kidnapping fit into all this? That sort of stuff. Alas, right now that subplot seems to be put on a backburner, which is a shame because this is the plot-line that leads to future events, such as Jian Yi's disappearance. The kidnapping is still going to happen and the threat looming over Jian Yi is still real, yet OX does very little to explain anything about it. Naturally, revealing everything at once is out of the question, but if it were me, I would have opted for unveiling bits and pieces now and then. To start with, it would have propelled the plot forward. Apart from that, it would have given the readers some food for thought and kept the intrigue fresh — they would have been cracking their heads to piece the puzzle. Finally, the characters' darker backgrounds provide the opportunity to give them development. For instance, how would Mo's view of He Tian change, if he learned that the latter had to face his warped father to save Mo (ch. 245 and further on)? Or how would Mo react, if he learned that He Tian lost his mother (presumably) due to his family shady dealings? Would it make him understand the other boy, relate to him on some level? Etc. 

The comedy and fun, light moments are precious, but I miss those moments when the manhua challenged my impression of the characters. Right now, the plot stagnates in the sense that we know that someone is threatening Jian Yi, but we aren't being given any clues or updates on the matter, as if the whole thing wasn't important. So, in response to your question “what would I have removed”, I would say that I would probably drop quite a few school-centric chapters in favour of “criminal” subplot. Just a bit: maybe show Mr Jian's messages, or Jian Yi's mother discussing the situation with him, or He Cheng receiving some reports on the situation.  

The character recent portrayal also disappoints me on occasion. They started as stereotypical manga characters, then they were given some depth, and now they are close to becoming yet another set of stereotypes. Yeah, I get that Mo is a tsundere and enamoured He Tian is an idiot in love — OX has been depicting them as such for the past year. It would be cool to take a look at other facets of their personalities now and then too. While it’s understandable that only a few weeks have passed since the beginning of the story, OX should remember that years have passed for the readers; keeping the audience engaged should be among their priorities.

I suppose I do have a bias here because as an adult I have little interest in all things school-related, and in general, I am not too fond of slice-of-life (I typically avoid reading it).19 Days attracted me because it had some universal themes, like dealing with past and legacy, finding your path, healing from the old scars, learning to handle difficult relationships within a family, and of course its low-key “mafia” subplot. It could be that OX truly doesn't have a meticulously chapter-to-chapter thought-out plot, hence why the manhua meanders at times, or it could have something to do with Mosspaca's internal agenda. Perhaps, it is the latter and the company somehow insists its artists stick with simplistic plots for the sake of keeping their target audience. Even so, there's a catch here, which was brought to the attention by @agapaic: the original reader audience has aged up already so to keep them hooked it would be wise of OX to “mature up” the comic as well. Not in the sense of 18+ content, but in the sense of introducing more mature subjects alongside the comedy and slice of life. Perhaps, they are not looking to keep the fans but to attract the new, younger ones. Who knows.

2) Drama and comedy imbalance. It is a pet peeve of mine which I consider to be one of the prominent manhua flaws: there is lots of slapstick comedy which ends up being out of place on occasion. I do realize the comic is humorous, however, there is no denying that OX introduced themes and topics that are no laughing matters. Jian Yi's and He Tian's loneliness, bullying and ostracizing, extortion racket, absentee parents, youth gangs and violence — just to name a few. There is a lot more, but you get the picture.

It is also obvious that three out of four main characters carry the remnants of childhood trauma with them, which directly affects their present selves. All the same, these topics practically fizzle out as soon as they get introduced, or get swept under the rug with comedy. Considering the humorous nature of the comic, it is given that dispersing some grimmer topics with playfulness will be used now and then. To my mind, however, OX relies on that abrupt drama-to-comedy switch too heavily, which makes the transition steep and often out of place. At times, it creates an impression that the author does not take these issues seriously. There have been numerous episodes when emotional moments were subverted and then dropped, without gaining climax and closure. For instance, the moment that sticks out to me the most is when He Tian attempted to tell Mo why he liked him. The visuals made it clear that it wasn't easy for He Tian to say out loud, yet OX never gave the intense moment the needed closure.

Mo brushed He Tian off and the latter just rolled with it, as if it never took him any courage to say those words, and then everything was swiftly engulfed by slapstick humour (the ball-slapping scene). A panel showing a glimpse of He Tian's face sinking to indicate he was somewhat let down by Mo's nonchalant response would have been appropriate — in fact, it would be natural for someone to get hurt when their confession is taken lightly. Likewise, I half-expected OX to show a bit more of He Tian's reaction towards Mo's story about his meeting with She Li. We got to see his expression darkening when he learned that She Li gave Mo the ear piercings, yet this time — mind you, when Mo suggested that She Li might have murdered someone — we never see He Tian react much. For the record, it was He Tian who asked She Li a rhetorical question about being able to take responsibility for taking a life.

Furthermore, I believe that someone romantically invested in another human being would have naturally shown more inquisitiveness upon hearing a story like that. Sure enough, some would say that Mo would not have liked talking about a traumatizing event, and that is fine as well — just show it. A single panel of He Tian being concerned and trying to inquire further and Mo refusing to talk would have been a very neat detail that could have potentially smoothed the transition into humour, while keeping our heroes in character.

3) Sometimes there is too much focus on the couples. The manhua has introduced several reoccurring supporting characters which are directly linked to our main quartet. For example, Mo had bonds before meeting our boys: his henchmen, the Buzzcut. Likewise, He Cheng was the one to raise He Tian; he shaped the boy's outlook on life.  These characters all played important roles in making our boys the people they are today, and yet we know so little of their bonds. Maybe the Buzzcut is unimportant in the larger scheme of things, He Cheng, however, is not only linked to He Tian, but he also plays a part in the underlying mafia/gangster subplot. It would have made sense if he was the one to shed some light on the situation with Jian Yi and He Tian's traumatic past. I would have loved to see our boys interact with other people as well — it would have served to show the variety of relationships out there: friendships, familial bonds, mutual respect between the leader and underlings, etc.

Anyway, I am going to stop now. I could name a few more, but this text is already more than 2000 words long. I have made some posts with my nitpicking before, so if you wish you can read them here.  

link & link 

Once again, this is all entirely subjective and it is not meant to be perceived as me saying that the manhua is poorly written and no one should enjoy it. Writing and creating compelling plots is a tough job, especially when it comes to long pieces. It also goes without saying that the author should keep their target audience and marketing goals in mind. 19 Days appeals to a great number of people of all ages and that means that OX succeeded in creating something compelling. Their writing is indeed flawed at times, but there is no way around it. It is impossible to excel both at being a great artist and a good writer. While there may be things that each of us would want to change (when comes to characters or the plot), it is still important to remember that it is not our creation. We can only decide whether to keep reading and enjoy what we get or move along. There is no point in attacking the author or generating constant pessimism.

[themattress]

OUAT AND ME: SEASON 5

Story - The story for the first half of the season is the Dark Swan Saga and the story for the second half is the Underworld Saga.  The Dark Swan Saga is split between a flashback story where the main characters travel to Camelot to help free Emma from the Dark One curse and a present day story where they are back in Storybrooke with no memories of their time in Camelot and Emma appears to have become a full-on villain who seeks to claim the power of the sword Excalibur for herself. The Underworld Saga is a direct follow-up to the Dark Swan Saga, as the heroes brave the dangers of the Underworld, a limbo zone between life and death that curiously appears to resemble Storybrooke, in order to retrieve a fallen friend.

The Dark Swan Saga...should not have happened. Or to put it more clearly, Emma should not have ever been the Dark One and Storybrooke should not have been a setting here at all, as it ends up ruining the potential inherit in a Camelot-based arc. And that potential is all over the place, everything about this show's interpretation of Camelot is subversive and unique and reminiscent of OUAT at its best, and yet it takes further and further of a backseat in favor of Emma as the Dark One....whenever it's not taking a backseat to elements from Disney/Pixar's Brave! Yes, this is a problem I neglected to point out when talking about Season 4: the Disney influence on the show that was always there in moderation has started to become more pronounced, and it's to the show's detriment. Brave isn't even an adapted story, not even loosely like Frozen was, it's a pure Disney/Pixar invention. And yet the show is linking it to Camelot and the legend of King Arthur!? Frankly, I find that to be a little insulting.

And on top of everything, the arc pulls a plot twist in the last third that is completely unnecessary and merely overcomplicates things while pleasing virtually no-one: Emma isn't evil at all, but Hook is because she turned him into a Dark One against his will in Camelot when he was dying of a mortal wound! Given that the arc was doing an equally asinine thing with Rumple in claiming that he had become a pure hero worthy of pulling Excalibur from its stone because he threw some magic dust at a bear, this twist just adds to already mounting frustration. And then they pull ANOTHER twist where after Hook comes to his senses and has his big self-sacrifice moment, we learn that Rumple was still evil all along and has invalidated Hook's sacrifice to destroy the Darkness by taking it all back, becoming the Darkest Dark One who is more powerful then ever before, with Belle being none the wiser.

So after that bullshit is through, we get the Underworld Saga and...it's honestly the best that OUAT has been since Season 3! It seriously feels like the Neverland Saga and the Wicked Saga mixed in a blender, and while that's not always ideal, for the most part it works perfectly. Many of the characters begin to feel like their old selves again, we actually start to get moments of hope and happiness back even amidst the bleakness of the setting, Zelena finally begins changing for the better, we get an influx of returning characters who - for the most part - it's great to see again, and we are provided with an excellent Big Bad, Hades.

But sadly, it was not to last. The Underworld Saga ends with a highly questionable decision, in the third-to-last episode, leaving just a two-part season finale left. If that decision hadn't been made and the show hadn't been renewed, we could have had ourselves a blowout finale that left most viewers satisfied. But because neither of those things happen, we instead get a weak finale which sets the stage for weak finales in the next two seasons as well, and all three of these finales hold elements that could have worked blended together into one finale, but are underwhelming when taken on their own. If there was any need to confirm that this show's best days were long behind it, this absolute joke of a finale was that confirmation.

Characters - Misery, misery, misery. That's what you've chosen.

* This is Emma Swan's worst season, bar none. From beginning to end, the writing is all about Emma Torture Porn, putting her through metaphorical and literal Hell and turning this once proud hero into a punching bag. No matter what she does, no matter what choice she makes, it's always the wrong way to do things and she is endlessly shamed for it. This is a natural follow-up to what was happening in Season 4, where the definition of Emma's role as "the Savior" underwent a drastic shift. Initially, it was simply to break the Dark Curse, but then Emma took control of her own destiny and redefined it to mean the protector of the residents of Storybrooke so that they can maintain their happy endings or be free to obtain them. But in Seasons 4 and 5, it suddenly got redefined as Emma being personally responsible for giving everyone their happy endings, her own happiness be damned. That's why she was obligated to sacrifice herself to the Dark One Curse for Regina, and why her being the Dark One instantly causes her to be treated as the worst Big Bad to ever menace Storybrooke despite barely doing anything actually villainous. In fact, "Emma gets punished for doing good" is a pretty recurring theme at this point. It's tiring to root for such a perpetually miserable heroine, and so while other things hold my investment in this season, Emma is sadly not one of them.

* Snow and Charming have one good episode in the Dark Swan Saga, but that's not enough to make up for what utterly boring characters and utterly horrible parents they are in every other episode. The fact that they don't lift a finger to find Emma, talk to her, and get her to see reason when they think she's evil is beyond disgraceful, especially when it happens in the same arc where them being written as surrogate parents to Regina is taken to a whole new level of creepy. Like, a sickening level of creepy. They are suddenly written well, in regards to their parentage of Emma and in regards to everything else, in the Underworld Saga, but again, the show not ending means that it's not going to last into the next story arc.

* Henry really comes into his own this season. Being written like a teenager instead of a child does wonders for his character, as even amidst fantastical fairy tale backdrops and with the magical position of Author, he struggles with real teenage issues that anyone who is or has ever been a teenager can relate to. He experiences his first crush, struggles with trying to stand as more of an equal with the adult heroes, and even undergoes what's basically a crisis of faith. And now that he's past puberty, Jared Gilmore is a much better actor than he's been in the past, finally selling the material that's written for his character the way it needs to be.

* Regina starts off in full Mary Sue mode, following up naturally from Season 4. "The Price" is an episode that is everything wrong with her character in microcosm. However, after a few episodes pass she settles down into a relatively inoffensive, bland character for the most part. In The Underworld Saga, there are even times when she is downright likable, which almost distracts from how ludicrously good she has it in a place that is allegedly full of her resentful victims, whom she does absolutely nothing to help. Unfortunately, because of the questionable decision that was made by the writers in the penultimate episode, the two-part finale brings her full circle, with both said finale and the show going forward suffering for it.

* If Rumple had a return to form in Season 4, then Season 5 makes the issues with his character in Season 3 look miniscule by comparison. His imp self, whether featuring in flashbacks or as the form the Darkness takes to needle Emma or Hook into embracing it, is still a delight that Robert Carlyle clearly enjoys playing. But his human self, Mr. Gold, is handled atrociously. First he is an over-the-top coward beyond what he ever was in the past, then insufferably smug about being a "hero" even though he doesn't deserve that position, then it looks like he might just make the final turn to good before he swings in the opposite direction and becomes the Darkest Dark One, and as the Darkest Dark One he is a cold, abusive dickwad who isn't fun to watch and Robert Carlyle doesn't seem to be having as much fun playing, as he starts phoning it in on more occasions than is usual for an actor of his caliber. It's only in the last five episodes, when Belle is taken out of the picture by a sleeping spell, that he suddenly regains some of his former glory and becomes engaging again, but even then the series not ending deprives him of a conclusion at a point where he could have one, so we're stuck with the Darkest Dark One for a whole 'nother season.

* Hook is mostly great in this season. In the Dark Swan Saga, he is badly handled and often behaving insufferable in the Storybrooke parts of the story, culminating in his turn as Dark Hook which, while Colin O'Donoghue performs it amazingly, was highly unnecessary and only serves to convolute an already heavily loaded arc at the last minute. However, in the Camelot parts of the story, he is on top form as a romantic hero, complete with his original pirate garb. And he really gets to shine in the Underworld Saga, where we see him be brave in the face of bloody torture, recover from depression and rediscover hope, find closure with his older brother Liam, confirm his and Emma's relationship as True Love, and finally be resurrected by Zeus after being ordained a True Hero by him. He sadly has precious little to do in the finale and next season will totally forget about all this, but taken on its own, it's good stuff.

* How do you solve a problem like Belle? Put her to sleep, apparently. Yes, after having her re-enter a romantic relationship with Rumple (following a ridiculous, not-fooling-anyone tease that maybe she won't take him back), Belle learns that she's been duped again since Rumple had taken back the Darkness before she slept with him. But it's too late now - she's pregnant with his child! And she learns this from Rumple, at the same time he reveals his deception to her and finally gives her a "This is who I am, take it or leave it" ultimatum.  She spirals into an erratic mess, tries to redeem another bad boy romantic interest only to end up condemning his soul to the River Styx, and then puts herself under a sleeping spell after giving Rumple the extremely poorly-worded order to "do whatever it takes" to get her and their unborn child out of the Underworld safely. Rumple then literally objectifies her by placing her in Pandora's Box, which he lets slip through a portal in the season finale. And that's literally it. The writers aren't even trying with Belle. They just don’t care about her. She's done as a character.

* Robin Hood's soul is obliterated. I know it's weird to start off like this, with the last thing that happens to him in the season, but that really does overshadow what little else he does in the season where he was ironically made an "official" regular. This is the culmination of the misuse of his character: being made Deader than Dead by his rapist's psycho boyfriend. And yeah, the next two seasons retcon this fate, but when Season 5 is taken as is, then you enter the finale on a sour note because the bleakest thing possible happened to someone who really didn't deserve it, all so that Regina can make certain developments that would have better off not being made. It again makes me wish that Season 5 was the final season, since then there would be no option to make those developments and Robin could be spared. But as it stands, it's the last indignity inflicted upon the legendary hero, and on Sean Maguire.

* Zelena is promoted to regular this season, to the surprise of no-one. What is surprising is that the writing issues she had in the previous seasons are all but absent here. Zelena is an incredibly entertaining, funny, deliciously wicked, sympathetic, nuanced and ultimately redeemed character this season, with Rebecca Mader doing some of her best acting work. Her joining forces with the villainous King Arthur, her giving birth to her child, her tragic romance with Hades, and her reconciliation with her mother and sister are all highlights.

* Hades, the Big Bad of the Underworld Saga, is the best Big Bad this show has had since the Neverland Saga's Peter Pan. He's devious, underhanded and hateful, but he's also funny and smooth and, when it comes to Zelena, legitimately romantic. Greg Germann's performance is naturally the glue that holds it all together; he is just so charismatic. Hades is also a great example of a nuanced villain who doesn't end up getting redeemed, as in a great twist the curse that Zelena's True Love's Kiss breaks, a curse to stop his heart and dull his feelings, was put on him by Zeus for a damn good reason, as he is an absolutely sadistic psychopath with his heart beating. The only downside to Hades (besides the needless Disney-esque fiery blue hair effect they occasionally use on him) is that his defeat is rather anticlimactic, hinging entirely on the fact that he forged the only thing in existence that could kill him. If he hadn't made such a monumentally stupid blunder, taking him down would have been much harder. His actual death scene is well-done, but in context it’s pretty silly.

* Camelot introduces an onslaught on new characters: King Arthur who is reimagined as an insecure, self-righteous tyrant, and his wife Queen Guinevere whom he has under mind control so that she's unwaveringly loyal to him. There is also the short-lived Sir Percival, the even shorter-lived Sir Kay, and Sir Morgan who ends up being the Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court. Sir Morgan's daughter, Violet, is Henry's adorkable new girlfriend. The nearby kingdom of Dunbroch gives us Merida and her father King Fergus, whom was surprisingly allowed to get killed off. And we even have some returning characters like Sir Lancelot (not killed by Cora after all), Mulan (suddenly a lone mercenary despite having last been seen joining the Merry Men), and Ruby (and oh boy, I'll get back to Ruby soon...)

Two absolutely pivotal characters to the show's overall lore are Merlin and Nimue. Merlin, who contrary to usual depictions is a young black guy, is the Sorcerer who was constantly alluded to in Season 4, responsible for such things as the position of the Author. His ex-lover Nimue became the first Dark One through drinking in the power of the Holy Grail and then perverting it for murderous vengeance. It was Merlin who reforged the Holy Grail into Excalibur afterward, then breaking it in half and creating the Dark One Dagger out of the top half. Nimue, meanwhile, is the closest to a Big Bad that the Dark Swan Saga has apart from Emma and Hook, influencing them as an avatar of the Darkness prior to her actual soul, still bonded to the Darkness, rejoining the land of the living alongside the other dead Dark Ones. With her ashen-gray face and creepy monotone voice, Nimue is a truly unsettling figure.

* While there are a few new characters encountered in the Underworld such as Hercules, Megara and Zeus, the main attraction is all of the returning dead characters they were able to get back on the show. Neal, Cora, Henry Sr., Peter Pan, Cruella De Vil, the Blind Witch, Prince James, Milah, Liam, Gaston, the Sorcerer's Apprentice....even obscure characters like Stealthy and Claude! Some are utilized better than others, but it's great to see all of them.

And then there's one living character whose return I could have done without - Dorothy Gale, who is even blander as an adult than she was as a child! And to add insult onto injury, the writers clearly set up a gay storyline between Mulan and Ruby in the Dark Swan Saga, only for Disney to apparently step in and not allow it since Mulan is in the Disney Princess lineup and her in a gay romance is bad for the brand (then why'd you allow her to have feelings for fellow Disney Princess Aurora then!?), and so out of nowhere we get the Ruby/Dorothy romance in the span of just a single episode. Watching Meghan Ory desperately attempt to act like she's in love with the wooden actress who plays Dorothy is painful to watch, and this being Ruby's final appearance just hammers how how utterly wasted this poor character was.

* The two-part season finale brings another unwelcome return: the Dragon from the abominable "Selfless, Brave and True" episode of Season 2 (like Lancelot, he is retconned into having survived). We are also introduced to Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, and the Land of Untold Stories in which they reside...and as I'll detail in my next post, this is a place and a concept that is so wasted, even by the standards set by this show, that it's mind-boggling. Last and most certainly least, we have the Evil Queen that Dr. Jekyll's serum brings out of Regina, with Lana Parilla in full camp mode while playing her. And after a fake-out where it looks like she's dealt with, she's shown to be alive and will be our next antagonist. Joy.

Atmosphere - Whether you like this season's atmosphere or not, there is no denying that it has distinct atmosphere: dark and morose and foreboding, to the point of bleakness, coupled with a sweeping epic and romantic feel. I personally feel like this atmosphere is perfectly appropriate when the stakes are raised so high and the show is dealing with two of the oldest mythologies in the world, Arthurian and Greek respectively, but it seems that too frequently the show doesn't know when to hold back and reign it in a little. This is especially the case in the final two episodes of each arc (not including the two-part season finale). I must definitely give props, however, to the designers of the Underworld's version of Storybrooke, or as fans liked to call it: "Scarybrooke". With the decaying buildings, red sky filter, and broken clock tower in the middle of the street, you really feel like the characters are traversing an eerie new world even though it's technically the regular old Storybrooke set that is being used.  

Also, despite being featured in the wretched episodes "The Price" and "Dreamcatcher" and has the first part of the wretched finale named after it, I really like the usage of the song "Only You" by Alison Moyet. It adds kind of a (suitably romantic) theme song to the season.

Episode Quality - While the Dark Swan Saga may not be a good one overall, its episode quality is a mixed bag. "The Broken Kingdom" and "Nimue" are easily the best episodes, since they are almost exclusively focused on Camelot. "The Dark Swan" and "The Price" are easily the worst episodes, starting the arc on off the worst possible foot. "Dreamcatcher" and, especially due its Brave connections, "The Bear and the Bow" are vey weak episodes, while "Siege Perilous" and, in spite of its Brave connections, "The Bear King" are surprisingly strong episodes. And then there's the Dark Hook trilogy of "Birth", "Broken Heart" and "Swan Song", which have some amazing visuals, brilliant acting, and dramatically thrilling moments, but they unfortunately can't shake off just how badly the Dark Hook twist affects the story. I never liked the idea of making Emma the Dark One, but if the show was going to do that, then they should have gone the whole way with it rather than pull this kind of bait and switch.

The first four episodes of the Underworld Saga, dedicated to saving Hook, are its strongest: "Souls of the Departed", "Labor of Love", "Devil's Due" and "The Brothers Jones" flow really well into one another and all have their share of memorable moments and interesting character development. "Our Decay" and "Sisters" are also strong episodes, although they have some drawbacks such as a well-acted but painfully uncomfortable scene between Rumple and Belle in the former and the inexplicable wasting of Prince James in the latter. "Her Handsome Hero" and "Ruby Slipper" are the only truly weak episodes in the arc, and even they have their moments, usually courtesy of Hades. Finally, the climactic "Firebird" and "Last Rites" are of the same quality - everything that transpires in the Underworld is fantastic, but everything that doesn't is flawed. The flashback in the former is completely nonsensical and does Emma's character a huge disservice, which is especially a shame when her present-day material is some of her best in the season.  The Storybrooke-based events in the latter culminate in Robin Hood's death and I've already made my thoughts known about that, but the quest in the Underworld shared between Hook and Arthur is something I never knew I needed, with Colin O'Donoghue and Liam Garrigan's chemistry being off the charts and the resolution we get for both the Underworld and Arthur's character being absolutely perfect.

And then there's the two-part finale, "Only You" and "An Untold Story", which I think actually holds up even worse than it did when it first aired. Emma revealing to everyone else that Hook is back alive, Rumple absorbing all Storybrooke's magic into the Olympian Crystal, Emma and Regina's argument that makes Henry think Regina is regressing, Henry blaming magic for everything and setting out with Violet on a quest to destroy it, and both the heroes and Rumple reacting accordingly all happens within the first 10 minutes. Just 4 minutes later, Emma and Regina are in Boston, Henry and Violet are in New York, and Snow, Charming, Hook and Zelena are in the Land of Untold Stories. And then, despite all this rushing, we end up spending 7 fucking minutes on a woe-is-me, martyr complex speech by Regina to Emma in Neal's old apartment. Regina and her angst ends up slowing down the second part as well, as the process of her using Jekyll's serum and separating the Evil Queen from her (encouraged by a re-idiofied Snow) goes on forever. The final scene being the Evil Queen's return, with her promising to be the next Big Bad to threaten Storybrooke, is the exact opposite of how to get me hyped for next season. At least with Season 4′s finale, there was the promise of going to Camelot in addition to Emma as the Dark One. What does this finale have to accompany the Evil Queen factor? Mr. Hyde and his invisible friends? Weak!

There are some elements in this finale that work and that I would have liked to see in a series finale at this point - Henry and Violet hanging out together, Rumple with his Olympian Crystal plot, Neal having some posthumous relevancy, the Land Without Magic outside Storybroke being a setting, and the full-circle element in regards to "New York City Serenade". But none of those things are worth how they were utilized here, alongside the reappearance of the Dragon, the wasting of the Land of Untold Stories, and Henry's cringe-inducing speech about believing in magic that Jared Gilmore probably won't be putting on any career highlight reels.

Overall - Season 5 is probably the most personally frustrating season of the show to me. I love it, I hate it, I find joy in it, I find despair in it, I can enjoy it for what it is while also agonizing over what it could have been. The one consistent I have in regards to it is that it should have been the final season of the show. If Adam and Eddy had allowed that, they still would have had enough goodwill from viewers to potentially do more in the OUAT universe afterward (ex: more spin-offs like Once Upon a Time in Wonderland; maybe one where they could utilize their Land of Untold Stories idea which seems tailor-made for an anthology series). Because as lows as this season's low points are, its highs are not going to be matched by the next two seasons, and that was the death of OUAT as a profitable franchise.

[nicolinocolino]

s4 thoughts

Okay so I’ve only watched the season once through and I’m sure I missed some stuff, but here’s my reaction for anyone who cares haha.

I’m going to start with Sana, obviously. Brilliant. Show stopping. Memorable. I never felt like the season was about anyone else, even with the side plots. I think this has a lot to do with the friendships, which skamit does really well. But this season was truly about her. And Bea did fantastic. 

I think the switch to make the Malik drama about Eva worked much better, as Eva is someone who’s kind of... swung from one guy to another and back. It just makes sense. I also loved how they toned down the drama and got rid of the cyber bullying all together. 

Sana’s voicemail on the roof explained it all... and it was so heartbreaking. Honestly, I could relate. I think that’s another big testament to the season — she’s relatable because she’s, you know, a person with feelings and expectations who doesn’t always make the right choices. I never felt like I wasn’t allowed to relate to her just because we come from different backgrounds. And isn’t that the point? Isn’t that the point of it all — to humanize her and not put her on a pedestal or be afraid of her? She hurt her friends who hurt her, and she let it all out. Sometimes we need that honesty to become closer to one another, and, in turn, understand each other better.

My favorite clip was the one of her and Malik talking about religion. The music? Her metaphor to the moon? God, she shone in this clip. I’m not a religious person, but I could feel the passion in her. I think it’s healthy to be challenged sometimes, too. I don’t think Malik saying that you can be a good person without religion is something I will forget.

Overall, her story was so good that I don’t really mind the other parts I was disappointed in. It was a fantastic final season. The music and editing and quality was incredible. She was the true star.

Okay, Marti and Nico. Because you know I love them a lot. And I’m sorry if I have more to say about them than Sana. I know it’s her season. But obviously Marti and Nico are my favorite and ALSO there’s just..... a lot to process regarding what we did get from them. I’m not the kind of person who can look at canon and be like, “I don’t like that so I’m going to forget it!” — no. I see it happen and my brain goes “make it make sense.” Which is what I’ve been trying to do because I really don’t want these two ruined for me. So:

First of all, I’m so, so thrilled that Nico’s “half a thing” long ago with Luai was the real deal. It had nothing to do with his mental illness and added depth to his back story that comes from a place of love and understanding. I cannot even imagine the guilt he must have felt at Virgilio after watching Luai get sent away. It must have been difficult to talk about, so keeping it from Marti (for so long!) is something I can kind of understand.

Which brings me to Marti’s reaction. I have mixed feelings. I definitely do understand Marti, in a way. When you piece together what he knew from Maddalena, that look between them he witnessed, Nico’s obvious lies... yeah. Maybe I’d go a bit out of my mind, too. Essentially, I can see this starting in ep 2 and building to ep7. That’s FIVE WEEKS of hardship on their relationship. FIVE WEEKS of Nico hiding the truth and Marti going insane pestering him. FIVE WEEKS of patience before Marti finally snapped. My big thing is I think Marti has gobs and gobs of patience. Without that real time format, it looks like he has none. But really? It was almost two whole months of... guessing and asking and getting nothing. Of course he was paranoid! Of course he was jealous! His patience, which I believe he had, wore thin. While I think some of what Marti did was out of character, some of it I can see. He gets angry, we’ve seen that. He withdraws, we’ve seen that too. Not saying this is the healthiest thing ever, but if you REALLY loved someone... you probably would be at least a little jealous. We villainize the feeling of jealousy so much — and it’s true that it’s not healthy in this amount — but it happens. And it happened to Marti. My big hangup is that I don’t really think that’s very in character for him, but in a way... I can see it. I think we can argue that what he did to Gio and Eva in season 1 was the result of some jealousy. Love makes you do all kinds of crazy things and feel all kinds of crazy ways. I half think that Marti “left” as a sort of final straw/ultimatum. Like, ‘ah, if I leave him maybe then he will tell me, since there is nothing left to lose.’ But then Nico didn’t, so he was left with that choice. I don’t think he really meant it, at least not for the long haul. If Nico were to text him the next day and say ‘yeah, you’re right, this is for the best’ Marti would be a giant mess. I can clearly see this was a situation of “well, I think he’s going to leave me for Luai, so maybe if I leave him first I can control the pain.” We literally see him reverting back to his old self in eps 7 and 8. He closes off. He doesn’t want to listen to his friends. At Silvia’s birthday, he was honestly being so loud and jokey and obnoxious. I truly think that was a mask. His “I have nothing to say to him” (referring to Nico) REALLY really got to me. That was not in character. But in hindsight, as I try to make sense of it, I think he said it because he wanted his friends to disagree with him. It’s more of a “I have nothing more to add” because, well, he tried. He tried for five weeks to get Nico to tell him the truth. He was left with his embarrassing mistake of leaving Nico, which he knew was wrong, and is embarrassed even more because everyone else knows it was wrong too. Somehow he has to crawl out of the hole that is his own stubbornness and pride. And in this super public space, he wanted everyone to think he was fine. But we know he’s not. We know he had a cliche low point eating ice cream on the floor. We know he’s hurting. In his mind, Nico possibly cheated and lied and might leave him and that hurts him. Because he loves him.

Which brings me to my next point. Marti you dumbass if you opened your eyes you could SEE how much Nico loves you. Everything from wanting to get coffee in the morning with him, wanting to pick him up from school, wanting to dance with him, wanting to help throw him a nice birthday, just the way Nico LOOKS at him... boy he LOVES you. And I bet that hurt Nico a lot to think Marti didn’t feel any of that. Nico shows his love, it pours out of him.

But also: Nico, my boy, why take so long to tell Marti the truth. If there’s nothing to hide, why does it matter that you had half a thing with some guy two years ago? I think what happened was that they didn’t have proper closure. Luai was essentially ripped away from Nico, horribly, in the middle of their half a thing. Did Nico even know that he was okay? And... the guilt? Oh my. I can only imagine Nico wanted to reconnect with him just to get that closure, and, in the process, because he never told Marti, it looked a lot like maybe something else was going on. Not only the night of the fight, but maybe after that there were some texts or phone calls, too. And then how do you tell your boyfriend that you want closure with your ex? How do you explain what you had, which never had a proper ending and, who knows, maybe would have grown or still have been going on if things were better and Luai never left? I think Marti could piece that together, too. He knows Nico learned the Koran for Luai. He remembers the talk in Nel Mio Letto. He knows how deeply Nico can feel. And, he knows that Nico’s feelings are real. Or, were real. And maybe had the possibility of becoming real again now that Luai was around again. 

The excuse that Nico didn’t tell Marti because Luai was engaged and wanted to keep it on the down-low doesn’t fly with me. Maybe it’s partly true, but I also think what I stated above was more of the cause. Nico didn’t know how to explain to Marti without sounding suspicious but needed closure. He tried to do both at the same time and failed. Because, duh. You have to be honest and hiding isn’t right and doesn’t work. I think it would hurt Marti to know Nico doesn’t trust him enough with that secret. So, in sum, they both need to trust each other more.

I was really excited for Nico’s clip and was left feeling kind of empty afterwards. I don’t like how Marti basically interrogated him. I think that if Marti wants that level of honesty with Nico, that’s valid. But there’s a fine line between that and pestering someone about phone calls. Which is what makes me think the thing with Luai was more than just the night of the fight. I think Nico was hiding a little more than a past. He was hiding his reconnecting to get closure. I mean, in the end, it’s a nice clip. The beach is beautiful and their kiss was cute and smiley. And that hug is god tier. I liked how we saw Nico’s meds in a short and respectful way even if just to give the audience some peace of mind. Maybe Marti only used his birthday as an excuse to be so nosy. I do think he was hurt by the lies — and Marti knows that lies can ruin things, he’s seen it happen — so he’s just on guard. I mean, I don’t think Nico’s lie was HUGE... it’s just the fact that it went on for so long even after Marti tried to tell Nico he wanted the full truth. So, even if I didn’t love the clip and am disappointed a bit in it, in the end it really just shows that they can and will work through everything.

So, like, did I want all of that drama? No. Is it realistic? I think so. I romanticize these two so much so it brought me down to earth a bit. Did I already KNOW they would be able to work through hard times? Well, yeah. I didn’t need to see it but in the end I’m glad I did. I truly believe they will face future hard times with the knowledge, now, that they need to do better. And honestly? I think Marti is 18 now and Nico is like 20? 21? And to be tested with something like this and work through it the way they did so young is a lot. Also, they’ve been together for over a year now. It takes about a year for that honeymoon phase to wear off. So in reality they are working through that right now too. Love is something they have to dedicate more time and effort to, and they did! They did do that and it’s nice to see that they’re willing to nurture this very very special thing they have instead of letting it fall away. And they made it out on the other side with, I think, more love and understanding for each other. I certainly love and understand them better now, too.

I might add on with more thoughts later, but this is what I have for now. Most of it is about Marti and Nico but, ya know. I love them dearly. Also, Sana’s stuff was just so good there’s really not much for me to work through with it. If you read this all, you’re a trooper lol