#and does mean. i probs would get to see bonnie

[ozlices]

if we ARE playing as cassie's dad in hw2, ill cry. dont do me like this. DIDNT SHE GO THROUGH ENOUGH IN RUIN I DONT WANNA PERCEIVE ANYTHING ELSE LEAVE MY BABY GIRL ALONE

[midheavenastrology]

❤︎♀︎♀︎♂︎♂︎♁Notes on Synastry ♀︎♀︎♂︎♂︎♁❤︎

♬"who do u love”? ♬

Alright y’all..I’ve studied astrological synastry for years now. These are my observations from my study so far 🙏

∞air sign Venus: y’all know you can’t date a hottie if they ain’t got the brains to boot so why y’all tryin’ ? 🧠 Air sign Venus’s are the true sapiosexuals of the Venus placements. Intelligence is of supreme importance to them- this is because air is about the mind and without mental stimulation our poor air babies shrivel up and die 🧟‍♀️ ✿honorary mention to Venus in Virgo/Virgo placements ♍️

∞people think air+fire and water+earth=best…but I’ve observed differently. Water+earth is quite peaceful and nice and comfortable but where’s the risk ? Where’s the spark ? This combo can get a little stagnant after a while…like all that water+earth just becomes a giant pile of mud that you can’t get out of. I would say this combo is still beautiful because water helps earth grow and earth gives water a container to feel safe. Now… fire and air..that’s a different beast all together … air will stir up the flames causing hellfire. Have you seen these two fight ? It’s vicious… two masculine energies trying to combat each other 🤦‍♀️ needless to say, this combo is NOT best. Whoever made this observation in the past must’ve been on a bender or some shit. Masculine+masculine=why ?

Now for the goodie and the baddie combo that does work :

Gemini+Capricorn: what u say ? Air and earth, let alone Saturn and Mercury ?? Hear me out: as someone who has personally encountered this, somehow this works/it’s like the dry ass, sarcastic humor of Saturn 🪐 and the witty ass, provocative humor of Mercury works perfectly in tandem- this is a relationship full of mean playful pokes at each other, lots of deep philosophical talks about life and a genuine friendship kind of relationship. Ride or die kinda energy 👯‍♀️

Pisces+Libra: this one makes so much sense to me: the exalted ruler of Venus: Pisces and the very very Venusian Libra…they’re probs that couple you see holding hands and making heart eyes 😍 at each other, while simultaneously never making a decision ever, because Libra is notorious for being indecisive and we all know how elusive a Pisces can be. But nevertheless, I ship 🚢 this. Two sweet af angels 👼 picking flowers 🌸 for each other and sending ten million heart 💜 emojis.

Leo+Cancer: ummmm hello !! The sun 🌞 and the moon 🌝 come on..this is classic. It’s like the celestial mom and dad got married in the sky and made sweet sweet star 🌟 children. Power couple energy 100%. They’ll probably build an empire together. They’ll probably have like 10 beautiful children who all become famous 💁‍♀️

Aries+Scorpio : I mean..let’s be real, one is the masculine energy of mars and the other is the feminine energy of mars. Two martians - what could go wrong, besides maybe their kids finding their secret sex lair oops 😬 this is like so so seggsy ! Fire 🔥 on fire on fire 🔥 also I feel like the only planet that could tame Pluto’s dark waters is probs mars.

Sagittarius+Capricorn: The ONLY thing that will keep a Sagittarius chained is a Capricorn ok ? I said it here first lol 😂 Capricorns are notoriously independent and sags love that. They have that devil may care attitude about life that wild child sag can’t stay away from. You thought sag was the wild child, think again. Just because Capricorn is ruled by Saturn does not for the love of god make them boring or rule followers. Every famous Capricorn I know is a rebel. After all, all those hard lessons and restrictions from big daddy Saturn: they’re bound to want to break free. Think of this combo as the Bonny and Clyde, wild at heart gypsy couple.

More to come in the future baddies 💜💜💜

[captainanndor]

I posted 455 times in 2022

That's 335 more posts than 2021!

8 posts created (2%)

447 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@maculategiraffe

@rhinozilla

@wardenmages

@drchucktingle

@kick-girl

I tagged 26 of my posts in 2022

#our flag means death - 7 posts

#ofmd - 6 posts

#stede bonnet - 5 posts

#edward teach - 4 posts

#renew our flag means death - 3 posts

#pirates - 2 posts

#i want what they have - 2 posts

#birthday - 2 posts

#blackbeard - 2 posts

#the orange - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 59 characters

#but honestly the most bites i've done are affectionate ones

I sent 1 gift in 2022

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Aww, I knew I celebrated a previous. birthday at a Ren Faire with a bunch of friends, all of us dressed as pirates. Forgot it was my milestone 30th. I rang in my 30s as a pirate & I'll be ringing out the end of my 30s as a pirate as well, cuz I am going to the Royal Feast this summer as a 39th bday treat! Hopefully this time goes smoother, because that was also the same trip where I got pulled over by a state trooper doing 72mph in a 55mph zone (I thought it was 65mph speed limit) and his first question to the car full of gals fully decked out in pirate looks was "you going to the ren faire?" Instead of saying NO for lolz, I said "um, yeah..." like a COWARD. As a "happy birthday" he didn't write me a speeding ticket but still wrote a ticket for my license plate frame because "you'd never get pulled over just for this, but it's technically illegal to have *anything* covering any part of your plate". The ticket was still ~$350 (thanks NYS surcharge). Anyways I got to feed a duck, ride a camel, and spend the day with some of the best people, so it was all worth it and I look forward to a repeat (on a slightly smaller scale, because I am le tired) for my 39th!

See the full post

1 note - Posted June 22, 2022

#4

For my 39th birthday, a friend and I made Roach’s 40 Orange Glaze Cake from Our Flag Means Death! We then set up a little scene and did a photoshoot for it. More under the cut!

See the full post

20 notes - Posted July 31, 2022

#3

I changed the first panel of this meme for a Twitter comment and then immediately had to change the second panel as well. Tumblr I know you will understand this joke.

37 notes - Posted June 15, 2022

#2

And while I’m at it! Putting this energy out there: #RenewOurFlagMeansDeath and cast Kate McKinnon as either Anne Bonny or Mary Read. They already gave us an in with Calico Jack whining he's been mutinied against 3 times recently and they ran with him historically. He’s also already out of the way so there’s no wasted time/boring love triangle drama and we can just have happy badass lesbian pirates co-captaining their own ship.

37 notes - Posted April 6, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Re-posting this from my own Twitter thread: Oh shit! #OurFlagMeansDeath S2 prediction:  Ed is gonna shoot Stede when they meet again. It’ll be dramatic, Ed’ll cry thinking he killed him, etc.  But the half of the fucking petrified orange Stede's daughter gave him will stop the bullet & save him #RenewOurFlagMeansDeath Or Izzy will shoot Stede, but I think Ed would be more dramatic for the story/reunion and needing to really knock him HARD out of The Kraken.  Ed knows Stede knows how to take a stab, or maybe their sword fight will be a draw or with Stede thinking he won and Ed pulls the gun. Ed never used the gun in the show. Only threatened Stede (and started to load it at the party) OH GOD! Actually, Stede will probs just refuse a sword fight. Ed will want one & Stede will refuse & Ed will threaten with the gun (again).Will the shot be intentional or accidental? (Does it matter?) Stede should never have left but the clean break/forgiveness from his family is what will save his life in the end. After also setting him free to love with no doubts or guilts from his old life haunting him. Knowing he's not a curse or a monster.

48 notes - Posted April 6, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[ballorawan740]

SCP Scenarios: When they get scared by the reader (REQUESTED)

Main Masterlist | SCP Scenarios Masterlist | My Works Masterlist | Rules | Request | Socials | My Original Post

Requested by: @_Milla_7849_

SCP 073 (Cain)

I feel like Cain normally wouldn't be scared

Like if you made him watch a horror movie, he might flinch slightly but wouldn't be terrified of it

So when you try to scare him like a prank sort of way, he would flinch a little more than usual but would recover seconds later

Like that one time when he was alone walking down the hallway looking zoned out since he was thinking of something

And you just crept up to him like the sneaky little child you are and jumped onto his back

He did get a load yelp but realised it was you

Luckily for you, Cain didn't give you a lecture like before and actually laughed with you

However, if you were kidnapped or taken hostage or used for an experiment, it would obviously frighten him and he wouldn't forgive himself

So to prevent this, he would keep you within his line of sight at all times

Anyways, as I've mentioned before, Cain would probably also give you a tight hug after your little stunt and unbeknownst to him, the researchers recorded it for a laugh

Cain did give you a lecture but forgave you since you were so young and he couldn't resist those eyes

And the researchers did give you some sweets

SCP 076-2 (Abel)

Now, a warrior like Abel wouldn't be so easily frightened

Especially if it was a child, even more so if it's you since he knows you too well and has personally trained you from the age of 5

Basically, Abel would notice your movement and body language well since you're both stuck together

So you have devices a plan with your scientist friends to try and scare him

And yes, it's working

Because Abel got extremely distracted by Iris

Iris basically got yahooted into this mess and was told to wear a lingerie

Yes, you did scare him by shoving him into Iris

I wouldn't say he got a scare, but more like a surprise

Poor girl she just wanted to sleep

SCP 999 (Tickle Monster) 999 would most likely be scared the easiest out of everyone on this list

Aside from Glass

He's like a close second

Back to 999, you both were just chilling and wandering around the facility aimlessly

Because yall are boring (TBF you're both trapped in this giant mf blop of a building)

Anyways, let's just say that it was Bright and Clef who introduced you to the world of pranks and you guys thought it would be funny to scare our 999 here

Basically, yall decided to play dead and then pretend to turn into zombies with some makeup

Yes, it did work since you've managed to scare the living daylights out of 999

And he was about to have a cardiac arrest (if he even has a biological heart)

And yes, it almost ended in another breach

And 999 did give you a lecture on how to not scare people like that

He does sound like a grandpa though XD

SCP 682 (Hard to Destroy Reptile)

I would say that scaring 682 would be difficult, but I won't since he's already terrified of that rabbit

You, along with the other researchers, thought it'll be fun to pull a prank on 682 in form of a magic trick

It's a classic rabbit in the hat trick and yes, you did pull SCP 524 out of the hat

But, little did your tiny brain know, that rabbit basically eats everything, including itself

So you just watched 524 approaches the already terrified 682 and nibble on his feet

And yes, you and the other researchers laughed hard since he crawled up the wall to get away from the rabbit (I'm now officially adopting 524 as my other pet)

Sadly, 524 didn't stay for long since another doctor needed him for a test with Josie (yes, the cat)

682 basically shouted at you for doing such a thing on him, your dad

But you ignored him anyways since you knew he never meant what he said and he wouldn't be mad at you for long

SCP 049 (Plague Doctor)

Our bird boy here is pretty much neutral when it comes to being scared

Like, he can be quite unfazed by many things, so it's no surprise if you or any other SCPs tried to jump on him

So as part of an experiment, you and your friends had decided that you would try to play dead and see if 049 would be terrified

Well, 049 was somewhat concerned and when you carried on playing dead, he became scared since you weren't so conscious, or so he thought

Since you played dead extremely well for such a young child, he tried to see if he could fix you

And before he could do anything, you jumped up at him like Bonnie from FNAF

Yes, he looked like he jumped out of his skin and was so stunned that he just sat in the corner with his head down for an hour

You all had to check up on him and he said he was 'fine'

He wasn't

049 gave you a lecture about playing dead like that unless there's a dangerous SCP

SCP 035 (Possessive Mask)

Now, since 035 is a mask and is very much a master manipulator and an award-winning actor/actress, you would most likely be able to take on those traits from him

When you were younger, you were eager to learn from 035, who you see as not only your best friend but also an idol, so he taught you everything he could

As you got older, you've gotten better at manipulation and acting, so much so that even 035 couldn't tell if you were just being you from time to time

So one day, you've decided to prank your dad because you were hella bored (like you always are :((( cuz yall never be productive and just sit on your flat bum all day and watch YouTube, Netflix or play games then sleep)

You basically produced a fake body of yourself and wrapped it in a black bag and sent it to 035's cell

Then, you've got one of your researcher buddies to write a note of your passing and that you do love him very much

035 did receive the message and made sure that there was a dead body in the package

He was pretty much convinced that it was you since you were able to disguise the fake body like bone and flesh

Which of course scared him to death because he was about to attack everyone on site

Luckily you got there on time to stop him which freaked him out and yes, you've gotten a lecture about being such a prankster (You got grounded for life but that didn't stop a rebellious child like you)

At least everyone at the facility has gotten a laugh about it for the next 3 months

SCP 105 (Iris)

Pranking Iris wouldn't be hard, but that doesn't mean she's fazed, but not in a sense like 049 who wouldn't get a good scare from some SCPs which could do him harm

Iris is very much a self-aware and open-minded individual who has common sense (unlike you, who don't even move out of your bed or even use your non-existent brain cells)

She's very much like every other person you'll meet on the streets who wouldn't just believe the first thing that she hears since she is very much a rational person

So, if you want to devise a plan to scare her, it'll have to blend in with everything or be quiet out there with realistic effects

You'll have to use your head to think of a good prank to scare her, which you did since you've inherited her intelligence (that's a lie because you don't have any intelligence left in you)

As her child, you have decided to prank her by making her a fake copy of her camera but instead of her being able to control objects within the photo, she would end up destroying it

You gave it to her as a gift and she accepted it with suspicion since you don't normally get her anything and encouraged her to try it (you're such an ungrateful child)

Cain, Dr Glass, Dr Kondraki and a couple of others wanted to see as well, so they stayed and watch

Much to everyone's horror, the illusion camera did exactly how you designed it to and Iris was furious and saddened

Later on, you told her about the prank since you feel bad and she was extremely mad

So instead of grounding or lecturing you, she decided to have revenge

SCP 106 (Old Man)

Now, scaring this old man would be rather interesting because he doesn't seem too fazed by the other, more dangerous and unpredictable, SCPs

But, you can still scare him to a certain degree

I mean, he is an old man after all, so scaring him would be fun

As long as you don't give him a heart attack then it's fine I guess (cuz yall be evil for scaring such an old man)

So, you have decided to scare 106 by giving off little bits of harmless pranks at first so 106 would let his guard down for a moment

Like, giving him a box full of spiders (he's quite disgusted by them just like how he sees your face every time) and popping an air-filled bag (Don't lie, you've all done it and it's hella fun)

Later on, you would gradually move to play with the more dangerous things, such as getting him to look at a picture of 096's face (Probs ugly like yo-)

As time moved on, 106 seemed to be relaxed and expected you to bring him random things and soon realised that there was something off

You didn't show up to him for almost a week and he was ready to get his dad mode on

Luckily, some of the guards caught you with Abel and got 106 involved since they were afraid of causing a massive breach

106 panicked and picked you up, giving you a lecture on how you shouldn't be with other SCPs like Abel

You managed to tell him that you've befriended Abel and he was stunned and gave him the dad glare (you know the one where dads would give to warn others to not hurt their kids right?)

And because it's Abel, he would even make sure to be with you whenever you were with him which made it difficult for you to play with Abel because he might steal you away (Yes I'm looking at you right now kiddo, don't play with Abel)

So in conclusion, if the prank involves you being in a dangerous position, he wouldn't necessarily be scared but would start to panic about your safety

SCP 096 (Shy Guy)

I think 096 would be similar to 106 in a sense but less logical and unfazed

It's more like he would be pretty panicky every time you weren't there with him and his anxiety would act up (like you every time you're preparing for your exams where you didn't even revise)

Like if you were with Safe class SCPs, he would be more relaxed than you being with a Euclid class, but it kinda depends on who it is

If it was Cain then it would be fine, but if you were to be with 173, he would be quite wary at first and would tell you to try and avoid being with that peanut

So if you wanted to scare him, it wouldn't be too hard

All you had to do was to be with another Keter class SCPs and play with them

He would be extremely cautious and terrified if you were with one and knowing this, you've decided that playing with 682 instead of playing with Walter the rabbit (SCP 524 | He's my other pet), you've decided to go up and pet 682

When 096 got a hold on the commission on you being with that lizard, he ran out of his cell, causing a huge containment breach on the way like he's bulletproof, and went yeehaw with 682

All you did was sit there in confusion as they entertained you with some pole dancing

Basically, if you scare 096, he would go from anxious to paranoid to berserk then to we're all going down to hell and back again

Dr Jack bright

This mf right here is unpredictable af

Like in his own body, he would remain unfazed and would even go as far as pranking you back

I mean he still would act all fun and games but since he can possess multiple bodies, the outcome of him being scared would vary which would surprise him too since he wouldn't know

Unless he decided to possess someone he knows well, but he knows better than to do that

Dr Bright would most notably be scared, like everybody else on the list, if you were to put yourself in immediate danger, but since you were just as crazy as your dad, he would most likely go along with it until you deliver your prank

Like, you could be juggling knives while standing on top of 682's head while singing 'Painted Smile' by Madam Macabre (If you haven't heard it, you should, it's amazing)

Also, he would sometimes find you having your back faced towards peanut and still be fine after having your neck being snapped (Yall be like surprise mf)

Anyways, one time Jack had made a promise to you to meet you at a certain place and he was late

So you stormed into his office (like the entitled little nugget you are) and went 'tick-tock mf' to your dad

Well it worked and you showed him your trick with the Keter classes

By causing a containment breach and somehow you managed to bribe the Keter classes to perform with you

Let's just say that just because you've inherited his craziness doesn't mean that you could go as far as doing this prank

Bright was about to drop dead from a heart attack and he banned you from doing such things in the future

Dr Simon Glass

With Simon Glass, you could give him a fright relatively easily

Just because he's a psychologist and can read people rather well, he still would be terrified and paranoid about whatever you were planning on doing

Even if he told you not to

Like that time when you were told to not make toast because you can't cook and you almost burnt the whole facility and Glass stood there and said "I told you so" (he did ask for toast, as in toasted bread, not toasted humans)

Anyways, being the child of Simon Glass meant that you would learn a lot about the human mind and behaviour

He would teach you everything you were curious about and would sometimes ask Diogenes, Light, Kondraki, Cain and Iris to help teach you the things he wouldn't have much knowledge on

And sometimes Clef and Bright would appear and spoil you (not that Glass doesn't, he's just busy and trying to be the best dad he could by being anxious about you being alone in the facility with so many dangerous SCPs)

So this often meant that you, Bright and Clef would pull pranks on each other, usually on Kondraki and Iris

Except for this time, you've decided to pull a prank on your dad, Dr Glass

You've handed him over a realistic model of SCP 058 and he freaked out and called the MTFs

They've checked the model and realised that it was all fake and poor Simon had a heart attack from you

Simon was about to yeet that spider looking thing but it was able to move so he planned to carry you and yeet you both out

He did give you a lecture on doing that stunt and you did shed a few crocodile tears

And yes, Glass gave in and comforted you

He then went to grab Clef and Bright's ears and lectured them about helping you make the prank

Dr Alto Clef

I feel like Clef would be similar to Bright but without the whole process of changing bodies because of some curse

Like Clef wouldn't be all that scared since he's dealt with SCPsbefore and dies an extremely good job at it

So for Clef to be scarred for life, it'll either be an extremely dangerous SCP, he's drunk and/or high, he must care about you a lot and you must've been out of your mind to do something seriously stupid or you're evil enough to piss off a Simon Glass (Or all of the above if you're evil enough)

You would most likely want to take the easier and quicker route out of all the ones mentioned on the list which is to put yourself in an immediate danger

So you had asked Dr Bright for some help and so he did

Moments later, midway through preparing your prank, Clef came to Bright asking if he saw you and he did

However, they heard a familiar scream from down the hallway and they both rushed to your aid and soon realised that it's you

You were about to get eaten by 939 and they had to signal for the MTFs to help (Because you mfs didn't ask me for permission when you wanted to pet 939 D:<)

Clef gave you a big lecture and comforted you after he cooled down

Bright on the other hand wasn't so lucky as Clef wanted to murder him (But in his defence, you didn't tell Bright how dangerous the prank was cuz yall are as stubborn as a rock)

Dr Benjamin Kondraki

Kondraki would be pretty much average when it comes to being scared but with a little more logical since he works with the Foundation

He's that type of dad who would let you go to sleepovers every now and again as long as they weren't of the opposite gender (Unless yall are Bi, Gay, Lesbian, Pan, Alien, Basketball etc then he's screwed)

We support BLM and LGBTQ+ in this community and anyone who says otherwise must leave now

Heck, even our friends here, especially Kondraki, Glass, Bright, 999, Cain, Iris and Josie (SCP 529, my new pet) supports them

Anyways, back to the main plot

Depending on what age you're at and whether you were planning to prank him with the Foundation staff or SCPs will lead to a different outcome

Like if you told him you were dating someone he would've died right there and then

No dating until you're 50

Anyhow, you've decided that it'll be funny to scare your dad with Clef and Bright by getting his Bootyflies to shapeshift into various Keter class SCPs and acting like it

And yes, you somehow managed to persuade the Bootiflies to do just that

And no, Kondraki didn't know about this even though he found it odd that his bootiflies didn't obey him that day

You got Kondraki to sit down in a room with Clef while you and Bright was setting up everything

The bootyflies shifted into the Scarlet King and boy sis Kondraki called the MTFs and was boutta shoot him

Everyone in the room had to get him to stop and that it was just a prank (And by everyone I mean just you, Bright and Clef)

Kondraki did manage to stop and was boutta drag you out for a big girl/boy lecture

Well, he did but not before kicked Bright and Clef in their privates first

Needless to say, nobody wanted to prank Kondraki again (Shush, no you don't, yes I'm looking at you from behind the screen and I know that you'll do it again)

[startwithbrooklyn]

THE GREAT ND REWATCH OF 2021 / SEPTEMBER 27, 2019 // the poisoner

hi yall its been two full weeks since the last ep which means carson's been in jail for two weeks so on with the rewatch 🥳

-"it's all my fault" love how shes still making other peoples traumas about her

-"tell him yourself" of course the best advice comes from a woman here (yay adults!!)

-something about nancy not eating d/t stress + george's mom making food for her after being possessed (bc moms cook and nancy doesnt have one? idk)(carson makes meals but they always get interrupted thats a future ep bullet point lmaooo)

-that is a HUGE fucking cake lmfaooooo

-"she talks to my mom" think i mentioned this previously but something about george --> george's mom + bess & nancy /like victoria has this relationship with these girls who dont have moms, which is ironic bc victoria can barely be a mom to her own kids (& wondering if george is taking her mom for granted or jealous that she helps these other momless girls but not her own girls)

-"i'm the worst" again with the melodrama like can u stop 🙄

-"Hi." - this moment really made me ship nace honestly

-look at nick swooping in to take the heat for nance

-lmfaoooo w/ her fighting w/ herself like this to look it up or not (+ace stalking in the bg lmaoo)

-living for this side part of hers honestly

-"where you punched a bookcase near my head?" okay you were acting crazy too bitch

-BESS in the office 😂 the unsubtle queen

-"you okay?" 😔

-switching to the actual video footage of her recording was the perfect opportunity to have the killer close a laptop screen or something to make it look like they were watching 🤦🏼‍♀️

-okay real talk. someone PLEASE explain to me what owen, nick, and bess were trying to bargain/bribe ryan with during this whole conversation

-"you're not your father, are you?" oh foreshadowing my good and loyal friend

-so in all honesty when owen broke that ghost trap i thought it was connected to how tiffany had possesed george (bc she was a freshly dead new ghost looking for a body to inhabit) and that owen had been nearby when sebastians ghost popped up and just possessed owens lil body until he took over owen's chi and became "owen" just to make up for having died on the bonny scot combined with how everyone thought he was sus and thats why owen broke the ghost trap bc he was actually a ghost. but it turns out it was just foreshadowing his death and the agleaca 🙄

-love how intuitive owen is w/ bringing nancy food here like he just knows shes been neglecting it and wants to see her eat in front of him so he knows shes eaten lately

-ACE with the sneak over nancy on the obits drawing her to the claw 0/1 high card rules

-"i'm the reason another person gets killed" damn sis how many fucking times can u blame urself for someone elses trouble

-bess's little smirks with these obits are so inappropriate but so funny lmfaooo

-absolutely loving ryans manipulations against mom here

-i knew that couple who walked past her in the car were super weird but i would never have thought they were ghosts

-"hero of horseshoe bays friends" vs "theyre not my friends" 🥺

-LOVE how she takes her beanie off when shes not alone anymore 😂😂

-i get being-dragged marks but how on earth do u know peoples shoe sizes from eyeballing prints??? (i mean i know my shoe size but if theyre limited stock then i get what i can get u know)

-i ship george/her crowbar

-"i failed my drivers test the first time i took it" okay bitch so did i lmaooo i didnt get ice cream tho i just got screamed at

-yes dr. nick show me that chemistry Phd

-wish claire would have gone into more detail about what fascinates her about heroes (false pretenses maybe? exaggerations made by press? wishing to strip heroes of their power by taunting them with perfect crimes? she probs did get off on getting away w it lmaooo not funny tho)

-okay. i can safely say claire would be me in this scenario with modified rare ass poison, a short list, and somehow getting away with it for years

-how does claire not notice her ring being taken??

-PRO FRIEND GRABBING THE PURSE GEORGE

-so actually george had the chem degree here, nice

-george + that hand on nancy's leg 😌👌🏻

-as a mom lucy must be so pissed here, "WHAT are u doing dying right now?? after all i went through to keep u alive?? unbelievable"

-love claire's instant fake limp at seeing ace lmfaoooo

-you did a good job. 💙

-i like how bess fusses at the end to make up for missing the drama

-"i'll sit this one out" nick says that in ep 2 bc he misses the morgue caper, then george misses the lilac inn sneak, (#saltcircleprobs) then ace misses the seance and now bess misses the poisoner 🤷🏼‍♀️ #justnoticingthings

-"why do you always show up?" what a fucking bitch slap lmfaooooo nancy is literally the worst sometimes 😂 like first the constant pity party of "all ills in the world ever are all my fault" and now literally sassing the people who helped u when u didnt deserve it by asking this rude ass question in the RUDEST WAY POSSIBLE?? nah sis lmaooo

-loving her hair here tho (her half up half downs are the best)

-"she found me though. when i was dying." 💙

and lastly

-"what are friends for?" LMFAOOOOOOO NICK U FUCKING SAVAGE good on u for reinforcing ur boundaries and not falling back in with the toxic ex 😌🙏🏻

[lalainajanes]

for the prompt list: 12. “Welcome back. Now fucking help me.” / 1. Coworker AU / 16. "Sit in my lap" :D

Thank you! I was thinking the other day that I’ve never really done a musicians AU which is silly. So I made that happen here though it’s probs stretching “coworkers.”

The Beat Goes On

When Caroline steps on the bus, she stops immediately, only halfway up the steps. She surveys the scene – Kol, Marcel, Klaus, plus about a half dozen fans. Her eyes turn murderous. She hitches her bag higher on her shoulder, yanks her suitcase up the rest of the way, and storms through the living area. She’s whipped the curtain that hides their bunks closed behind her before Klaus can snag her attention.

A pity. He’d been hoping for her help.

He’s in no mood for company either. Partying all night is such a rockstar cliché – and completely unrealistic considering they need to be on the road in a few hours, then unloading their gear in the next city a few hours after that.

It’s their first headlining tour. They can’t quite afford a complete crew. It’s going well, with most shows sold out. They’ve had to put in a rush order for more merch. Klaus has high hopes the next outing will be a little more luxurious.

Higher hopes that one day they’ll have more than one bus. He’s willing to share with Caroline. Preferably something with an actual bedroom – not the claustrophobic stack of cots they’re currently enduring.

He can’t complain too much. Their current accommodations are far superior to the unreliable van and dingy motels they’d piled into on their first tour. They’d been the first of several supporting acts, had considered themselves lucky when they’d turned a profit by the end.

That profit had bought some decent recording equipment, the EP they’d put out after doing well on Spotify. A better tour had followed. Then another. Press, photoshoots. Then interest from a few labels.

Klaus has only spent a few nights of the last few years in his own bed. He has no regrets.

He sets his beer down, stands. Pretends not to notice when one of the women who’d been inching closer and closer swipes it immediately.

He’ll have to check eBay tomorrow. See what the going rate for his saliva is. He doesn’t bother to excuse himself.

Caroline’s stowing her belongings. Klaus would bet they have the cleanest tour bus in the history of the music industry. Caroline’s a bit of a psychotic neat freak. Over the years she has doled out vicious punishments when a “Close Cohabitation Survival Rule” (there’s an extensive list - laminated and prominently posted) is violated.

Kol had been the slowest to learn. To drive the lesson home, Caroline had snipped out the back pockets of every pair of trousers he’d packed. She’ then hidden all of his underwear. Had bribed, threatened or cajoled every man on tour not to offer a spare pair.

She’d timed it flawlessly, Kol hadn’t had time to run out to a shop, and they hadn’t been significant enough to have anyone they could send on an errand. Kol had done a show with his arse – clad only in a pair of Caroline’s lime green lace boy shorts, hanging out of a ruined pair of jeans. The pictures appeared online within minutes, Kol will likely be answering questions about his preference in underwear for the rest of his natural life.

Caroline’s plots had done the trick. Their belongings tend to stay organized, their floors are never sticky, and the bathroom is perfectly sanitary.

Her bunk’s curtain is closed, but Klaus sees a faint glow, knows she’s not asleep. He yanks the curtain aside.

He’s willing to risk stoking Caroline’s anger. He’s exceedingly good at soothing her.

Caroline glares and tries to pull the fabric out of Klaus’ grip. “Go away.”

He gauges how much she means it, finds little heat in her tone. And she shifts over willingly when he climbs in next to her, lifts her legs so he can curl his under them. Caroline had showered at the venue, had her hair braided and off her face. She wears an old pair of sweats (his) and a tank top. Klaus attempts to coax, “Come out and have a drink.”

Caroline’s nose wrinkles, “Pass.”

“One drink.”

“I’m tired. It’s crowded.”

Weak excuses. “You’ll miss the show.”

That piques her interest. Caroline hates to be out of the loop.

“What show?”

“Our lovely manager should arrive shortly, shouldn’t she? Why else would Kol have three girls who’s name’s he hasn’t bothered to learn draped all over him?”

She twists her head to stare at him, and Klaus is sorely tempted by how close her mouth is. It would be so easy to close the minuscule gap and press his lips to hers, to stroke the spot on her neck that always makes her eyes roll back and her hips shift close.

But they don’t do that anymore.

“Are you telling me,” Caroline says slowly, disbelief etched in every word. “That Kol’s concocted some teen soap style plot to make Bonnie jealous?”

“I did try to tell him it was unwise.” Though, if he’s honest, Klaus hadn’t tried that hard.

Caroline presses the heel of her hand to her forehead, a frustrated groan spilling from her throat. “I have been trying so hard to convince Bonnie he’s serious. He’s going to ruin all my hard work.”

“All the more reason for you to come out, hmm? Can’t have all of your most excellent matchmaking going to waste.”

He’s not even upset when she elbows him in the stomach because he knows he’s won. He slides out of the bunk, and Caroline twists, “I need to find my phone and stall Bon,” she mutters. Her tanktop slides up as she rummages through her blankets, and Klaus clasps his hands behind his back because the urge to run his hand over the smooth skin of her hip might be stronger than he is.

He has a plan, well thought out, and practically foolproof. He cannot rush. Caroline pauses when she notices Klaus watching, balances on her elbow, and shoves his shoulder with her free hand. “Get out there. Make sure no one does anything too stupid.”

“No promises.” Klaus knows better. He’s known Kol since birth. Reckless acts of stupidity are one of his brother’s specialties.

Caroline’s found her phone, has settled on her stomach. She’s frantically texting, so Klaus exits.

He immediately notes that several bottles of liquor have made their way out. That more people Klaus doesn’t recognize have joined them. Kol’s lost some clothing, has got one arm raised high, splashes of what Klaus is reasonably sure is bourbon splashing down, onto his bare chest.

It has all the makings of a disaster.

Unfortunately, for some reason, Caroline is slow to appear. Kol’s at his jittery, exuberant drunk stage, unable to sit still or focus on a topic for longer than a few moments. He’s telling stories that are only half true, gesturing wildly. A few of their visitors are enthralled. Marcel had slipped outside with a few people, Klaus hears his laugh drift in through the open door occasionally.

Two women have boxed him in. They don’t seem to mind that he has no interest in the conversation they insist on prolonging. They giggle delightedly at his clipped answers. Klaus has already taken photos, signed skin. Has his fingers crossed their not the type to rush off to a tattoo parlor.

When Caroline emerges from the back, Klaus has a moment of déjà vu. She barely notices Kol; her attention focused on him, and the people invading his personal space. She’s furious again, more so, Klaus thinks.

He’s always been confident in his plan but won’t say no to the ego boost her obvious jealousy provides.

It’s a small space; she’s in front of him in a few steps. Klaus smiles up at Caroline, grabs her wrist. She appears confused for a second – it’s been ages since he’s touched her in front of another person.

He hasn’t attempted it since being photographed, having the images splashed all over social media and picked apart, became a real possibility. Caroline had begun shying away once the tweets and the Instagram comments had started coming in. Some positive, a lot negative. Klaus had followed her lead. Had figured he’d let her get used to the fame, that he’d just have to convince her that they could be together publicly without ruining what they have privately.

He drags her hand to his mouth, distracts her by pressing a chaste kiss to the back of it. He hears a gasp to his left, but he doesn’t care, tugs harder until Caroline loses her balance.

She lands in his lap, and one of the women leaps to her feet with a yelp. Convenient, as it gives Klaus more room to maneuver. He wraps his arm around Caroline’s waist and settles her more comfortably, her side resting against his chest. He pitches his voice loud enough to be heard clearly by everyone in the room, “A bit clumsy tonight, aren’t you? It’s fine, sit in my lap.”

The woman who’d swiped his beer bottle is either drunk enough not to mind her tongue or unconcerned with basic manners. “Are you two?” She lifts a hand in a gesture that’s both vague and slightly lascivious.

Caroline squirms, but Klaus squeezes her hip, cutting off her denial with a whisper in her ear. “You took ages. Welcome back, now fucking help me.”

She pinches his stomach in retaliation. Klaus holds back a wince. Caroline ignores it, turns on the charm, smiling warmly at their nosy questioner. “Nope. We’ve just known each other for ages. Spent way too much time in tight spaces. Not a lot of boundaries when you’ve spent months crammed in a van, you know?”

Klaus could comment about the private time they’d managed to enjoy in that van occasionally but Caroline’s fingernails are sharp. He doesn’t mind wearing their imprints, but he’d prefer to earn those marks pleasurably.

“So, you’re just friends?”

“Bon-Bon!” Kol shouts, interrupting Caroline’s response.

(Probably a good thing. Klaus isn’t entirely sure he trusts himself to stick to his timeline if Caroline tried to claim they were just anything while sitting on his lap and wearing his clothes.)

He’s surprised when Caroline settles back against him, rather than leaping to his feet. Pleased, too. Her arm drapes around his shoulders, her fingertips tangling in his necklaces. She watches the scene unfolding in front of her.

Her touch is familiar, missed. Klaus closes his eyes to enjoy it while he can.

[dewprisms]

After your binge-watching session, which would say is better: Kim Possible or Danny Phantom, and why?

Someone actually interested in my opinion for once?

Well it depends, both have their pros and cons in regards to episode plots/arcs, characters and chara development, character designs etc. So I’ll suppose I’ll break them down into different categories. Under a cut as to not make scrolling a hassle.

Also I apologize in advance for my page theme, I know it’s kinda shitty and hard to read sometimes but I’m too busy to change it right now.

Designs/Art: I know Stephen Silver was the main designer for both shows (and his designs for a lot of the teenage girls has a uh, Obvious Pattern.) Ignoring my bias towards Vlad and Drakken, I think a lot of the ghosts have fun designs, but KP gets points for actually letting characters (esp Kim and Ron) wear other clothes in S2 and beyond, and between Phantom, S1 Kim and S4 Kim I think S4 Kim has the best “action” outfit. BUT the art style for DP is pretty stiff at times and KP style has a lot more range for animation, body types and faces.  Overall though, I say they’re pretty tied imo. Both have a lot of ups and downs that truly comes down to a personal pref, even though the Fartman’s style is the more iconic one. I think KP wins animation/art and DP wins for designs.

Characters: Again, the villains shine here more than the protags. KP as such a wide range of villains that I have have to give them the point for creativity and FUN in antagonists, (Duff Killigan is prob my favorite in absurdity followed by Monkey Fist, the Seniors and DNAmy all tied for second. I really like Motor Ed too, seriously.) but that’s not to say that DP doesn’t have them either. Vlad’s true motivations are really...unique compared to other DP villains and even KP ones, (seriously? How many bad guys you know who’s goal in life is “fuck the MC’s mom and also make MC your son”) who like KP are just “take over the world and/or cause tons of destruction” but with only half the fun. Sadly Dark Danny’s entire thing hinges on him being Danny But Evil who only wants...destruction??? Whereas Evil Ron actually does something interesting with the character, showing Ron’s true potential (see Evil Ron vs Electronique in “Stop Team Go” for example) and being in-character for him still. (Faux Take Over The World plot to cover his true goal of owning all the world’s Nacos? Of fucking course Ron would. Brilliant.) Evil Ron still has hints of Ron’s personality (”Boo-yahaHAHAHA!”) whereas Dark Danny is just... evil for evil’s sake, which can be good when actually done right, but in this case isn’t because the only thing that resembles Danny is his outfit. Shego’s backstory is great. DP’s new S3 enemies are very boring despite interesting powers. KP S4’s Camille Leon is great but Warmonga is just eh. Moving on to protags, KP’s protags are far, far more interesting than DP’s. Which brings us to the next point. (Also Mr. Barkin > Mr. Lancer, and Kim’s parents > Danny’s parents.) KP gets this one.

Chara Development: Gonna say it, DP almost has none, and straight up regresses in very end of S2 and most of S3. I swear the only real characters who have any are Vlad (for better or for worse, the latter imo), Jazz (when they remember her, and is good) and Valerie (whose is good too). Tucker gets 3 (three!!) fking episodes about him and they ALL carry the same theme of him not being able to responsibly handle having any kind of power, which is why him becoming the town mayor at the end is so BAD. There’s NO WAY Tucker of all people would make a good mayor. VALERIE got more episodes than him, JAZZ got more episodes than him, both with development that STUCK while he’s a MAIN CHARACTER. Sam never changes, def for worse. Sam is a Base-Breaking Character for a dang reason. She’s extremely pushy, acts like she’s lowkey better than everyone else, and never seems to consider how her actions affect other people, and the like 1 or 2 times she does it doesn’t fucking stick like she’s Hank Hill or something. Danny has no real development for his character. All that develops for him are his powers and nothing else. On the other hand, KP characters DO have development and it shows! Not just for the protags but for villains too! Kim is bossy and a lil controlling early on and stops during S2, whereas Ron was extremely cowardly and gets, not exactly braver but just less phased by it all, plus early he never quite liked going on missions but later on gets sad if he has to miss them, before he doesn’t like being distractions but later on very much takes pride in being one, and etc. Drakken and Shego get development too, esp their relationship with each other AND with Ron and Kim. Bonnie actually got an episode of development (but sadly regressed in time for the finale) whereas Pauline just...never changes whatsoever. Bonnie actually makes for a good rival and mean girl for Kim for the entire show whereas Paulina and her relationship with Danny and Sam are just....bland and doesn’t go anywhere. There’s nothing for Dash, though Ron doesn’t really have an equivalent. So, KP gets this one.

Episodes/Plots/Arcs: DP wins in the Lore department by far, KP wins in character arcs. A Sitch In Time answers the great questions of What Would Happen if the Villains Teamed Up AND Shego is a Better Villain than Drakken so Why isn’t She in Charge? ft Time Travel. The Ultimate Enemy answers What If Danny Went Evil and Is Vlad Completely Irredeemable? ft Time Travel. KP definitely does the “balancing Hero duties with School life” better than DP. You can definitely see her struggles with it whereas DP is just kinda there. I also very much like that Kim is girly but is never shamed for it both in-universe and out, whereas DP is known for the shitty “I’m not like other girls” fake feminist bullshit. A problem I have with DP is that time pretty much never changes, as if the show takes place within a year, and it seriously hampers the growth of the show could have. Time is also just out of whack, they take their big end-of-the-year test then it’s Christmas THEN it’s Summer Vacation but even in S3 they’re all still in the first year of high school like ??? What?? Whereas KP starts in Freshman year and ends with Senior Graduation. The arcs of Danny/Sam vs Kim/Ron are just...D/S was definitely teased a ton more but by S3 you just get tired of it, not to mention the hypocrisy regarding the character relationships. Personal opinion warning, but Danny/Valerie had a lot more development in such a short time and was super interesting. Kim/Ron didn’t have as many teasing esp in S1 and S2 (it’s there though) but it def picks up in S3 and I love how their new relationship was handled in S4. Back to episodes, my favorite episodes for both are Reign Storm and So The Drama, but while I might be biased toward Reign Storm I’m gonna have to ultimately give better episodes overall to KP. So The Drama has Drakken going back to his Actually Dangerous roots from early on and becoming the closest to anyone to actually winning on his own merit (Shego stole the Tempus Simia from Drakken/Duff/MF and relied on weird time shit of Kim being “lost in the time stream” ((actual canon explanation)) to travel to the future specifically to stop her, to actually win) and is SO good when Dr. D finally gets defeated, plus (personal bias here) Kim and Ron’s teased hook-up finally happens. I will say though, I’m not a fan of S4′s Hana Stoppable/The Han story. As both shows are action-oriented, they definitely have their fair share of good fights but I think KP also has better action and fight scenes. Humor is extremely subjective but I think KP made me laugh more. Finally, DP is infamous for S3 just being bad whereas KP just got better and better with each season, though I’d put S4 below S3 and above S2. So: Lore = DP. Arcs, Action and Eps = KP.

Fandom: Ignoring the super gross shipping aspects of some parts of the fandom (If ur a P*mpousP*p or K*go shipper pls go away from my stuff i’m fucking serious), I think DP wins for this one. Many great OCs, (I really haven’t seen any for KP aside from next gen?) the already interesting lore is def expanded so much by fans, I legitimately don’t care for “Wes Weston” but my god did the fandom do some serious work for this boy. I don’t know too much about KP since the fandom seems kinda dead aside from some shipping stuff and a very slight revival from the movie, whereas DP ended before KP and is still very very active. DP wins fandom.

(Bonus) Reboots/Redesigns: I’m gonna be honest, I’m not sure what could be done better for KP aside from the mess of Disney’s out-of-order airings, a more serious reboot wouldn’t work for the show at all, but DP could definitely use a reboot and fixes the disaster of S3. And reboots & character redesigns are def a hot topic for the DP fandom. So DP gets this one, though I’m not sure if this is a good thing.

Final: So over all, 4 for KP and 4 for DP, or if you add the little groups, 7 for KP and 4 for DP. Overall, I’ll say KP is the better show, but DP shines with the fandom. I also have a personal bias in favor of DP but it makes them even out for me. If you want interesting lore and good fandom content, go for DP. If you want fun and interesting characters, actual character development and more action and drama, KP is the way to go.

But instead of picking one, just watch both!

[jcmorrigan]

Shattered and Mended

The F/O? XR from Buzz Lightyear of Star Command. The S/I? Rachel Sparks - fifth ranger of Team Lightyear with a big heart for justice (and no glasses in this ‘verse because I suppose Nebula would surgically augment my eyes to make sure Zurg couldn’t rip the glasses off and stomp on them, which is a Zurg tactic). The writings I did for XR are actually from a rather structured AU that runs alongside the whole show, and tell versions of episodes that are impacted by my s/i’s existence. This one goes with the ep “Eye of the Storm,” though it takes off after that ep’s timeline ends and does a whole other act that’s just basically a sickfic. This is actually probably the longest selfship piece I’ve written, but I love it because of the shenanigans.

Also, if you can guess what three works of fiction I appropriated for the bingewatch show, cookies for you.

***

It was a typical week for Team Lightyear. Answer a distress call, discover it was made by the daughter of a mad scientist (former Star Command researcher Spiro Lepton, in fact, though he now preferred to go by “von Madman,” apparently) in order to lure Team Lightyear into said mad scientist’s clutches, beat mad scientist after literally everyone on the team made him stronger by consecutively using energy-based attacks on him despite seeing the previous efforts fail, send mad scientist to jail, learn that mad scientist’s daughter isn’t so bad after all, learn that mad scientist’s daughter has a crush on your team leader, go out for group lunch at Cosmo’s.

           Cosmo knew by this point that he was best served getting Booster’s order off the oven first, meaning Rachel had to try and keep the saliva of hunger from escaping her lips as she watched him devour an entire plate of squirming curly fries in one go. Hot, crispy, lightly-spiced curly fries. Maybe she should’ve ordered that, she wondered, instead of the spurfion rings. At least this time, XR hadn’t forgotten he couldn’t eat curly fries and tried to put one in his mouth.

           Booster remarked that it was the perfect way to top off the day after defeating evil, and that seemed to be the cue for the reply: “Daddy wasn’t always evil. He used to be a good man.”

           Rachel wondered how exactly Bonnie had tracked them all down. It was a little creepy. In the grand scheme, however, that hardly mattered, as Rachel could read the dismay on Bonnie’s face. It couldn’t have been easy, living with the burden of having a man who literally renamed himself “madman” as your parent.

           Bonnie concluded her statement with “Just like Buzz” and turned to place her hands on Buzz’s shoulder and forearm.

           Rachel could sense Buzz’s discomfort immediately; he’d tensed up so hard, she could feel it from across the table. They’d all been briefed on Buzz’s history with Bonnie, and Rachel could hardly blame him. Erasing the memories he had of her as a child couldn’t be easy. Rachel pictured it for a minute – looking at Bonnie’s sultry expression and overlaying a grade-schooler’s gap-toothed visage over top. This prompted a shudder. Creepy.

           It got worse; as Buzz tried to convince Bonnie that her father had gone off the deep end (his black-and-white morals would be the death of him, but wasn’t that what made him lovable?), Bonnie begged him for attention, climbing into the booth, crawling toward him, attempting to pin him down. Rachel suddenly lost all sympathy for Bonnie Lepton. She now seemed almost predatory, physically positioning herself to fence Buzz against the window, making it clear what she wanted. Rachel wondered if she should step in, but found herself frozen, unsure exactly what move to make.

           Mira, as usual, decided to go the direct route, pulling Buzz toward her by the collar and hissing, “Can’t you see she has a huge crush on you?”

           Upon affirming this, Buzz returned to Bonnie; “It’s perfectly natural for you to have feelings for me. But they’re meaningless! It’s the classic damsel-in-distress syndrome. I rescue you, you go all moony!”

           That wasn’t how Rachel would’ve described Bonnie’s demeanor.

           Mira had nothing to say to this but a facepalm.

           It got worse when Buzz said he’d seen this dozens of times, to which Bonnie told him “I thought I was special,” and Rachel didn’t know where she could’ve gotten that idea at all, seeing how Buzz had done nothing but brush her off and turn her down and was she physically unable to take a hint?

           “Sorry, kiddo,” Buzz told her. “Just doin’ my job.”

           At least Buzz had been able to stand up for himself. Rachel felt quite protective of him in that moment; Bonnie certainly wasn’t the sort who would give up the chase easily. Could she not see how uncomfortable she was making him? Did she not get the concept of how their history was complicated? Did she not –

           But as Bonnie was pulling away from the table, XR tried to intercept her. “Hey, I think you’re special!” he said, pouring on the charm far too thickly as he clasped one of her hands in both of his own. “Aaaand, since you’re new to civilization and all, I should tell you – “ He whipped about to produce two mirrors from his inventory. “I am considered quite the looker!”

           Now Rachel had something to be even more upset about.

           Mira hissed “XR!” at him, not without a quick, pointed glance toward Rachel that informed her of the pure rage surging through the blonde.

           “That’s all right,” Bonnie said, flirtily planting a kiss on XR’s helmet –

           It’s that easy? Rachel thought. What makes you think you can just do that?

           “At least he’s treating me like a GROWN WOMAN,” Bonnie asserted.

           No, Rachel thought, he’s treating you like a piece of meat, and this should be why I’m glad we’re just friends, why I’m glad he doesn’t do this shit to me, but that still doesn’t explain why I’m the only woman in the entire galaxy he hasn’t even looked at –

           “Unlike a certain STUFFED-SPACESUIT JARHEAD ROCKET JOCKEY I KNOW,” Bonnie fired off as XR whooped his joy at having been kissed.

           There was nothing about this Rachel didn’t hate.

           “What?” Buzz asked when Bonnie had left. “What’d I say wrong?”

           “I don’t even KNOW where to begin,” Mira grunted.

           “Oh, no, Buzz was fine,” Rachel growled. She leaned out over the table to point accusingly at XR; “But can YOU stop being a perv for literally TEN SECONDS? Or is that a standard function of your programming, to be a complete and total creep toward every woman you cross paths with?”

           “If I can remind you, SHE was the one who kissed ME,” XR boasted proudly.

           “That was a pity kiss,” Rachel snarled. “You’re lucky you didn’t get your entire head smacked right off, which is what I would’ve done if I were her and didn’t know you.”

           “You’re just jealous that I’m a babe magnet,” XR teased. “You WISH you could get the attention I do.”

           Of course, he didn’t know exactly how hard that hit. That didn’t make a lick of difference.

           Rachel made a loud, wordless scream of frustration before forcing herself to be calm long enough to say “Mira…Booster…please let me out so I can storm away in a rage.”

           Seeing Rachel’s temper flaring as hard as it was, Mira and Booster wasted no time evacuating the booth so Rachel could stomp angrily toward the women’s restroom.

           Buzz watched her in confusion. “Is she…ah…is she gonna be okay?”

           “I just want it on record that I did NOTHING wrong here,” XR stated, arms folded.

           Mira buried her face in both hands. “Booster, you, me, and Rachel are the only three smart people left at this table.”

           “But Rachel’s not at the table,” Booster pointed out. “Maybe you should go after her, since…you know…you’re the only other woman here…”

           “No,” Mira sighed as she raised her face, “she needs to be alone right now – “

           Buzz was already making way toward the restrooms.

           “I SAID SHE NEEDS TO BE ALONE RIGHT NOW!” Mira yelled, to no avail.

           “SOME people just don’t know when they’ve crossed the line,” XR commented, earning him angry glares from Mira and Booster.

           Rachel paced back and forth across the women’s room for a bit, reminding herself not to examine the floor too long for fear of seeing the level of grime that was actually there and touching her boots. How dare he? No, he couldn’t know, but the fact that he was accusing her of being jealous of his ability to attract attention (which he didn’t even have; Bonnie was just as much of a shameless flirt as he and he had the luck to cross her path) when in fact, she did want to be able to attract attention, but only of one person, the worst person, the person who should have just proven she shouldn’t want to be anything more than friends with, and he was lucky to even be that –

           Frustratedly, she began to sing in hopes of getting rid of some excess negative energy, hardly thinking about the song itself.

           Why did she even still like him? He’s terrible, she told herself. But she couldn’t believe that anymore. Not after he’d engineered that entire scheme to get her un-fired from Team Lightyear. Not after their conversations regarding how messed up they both were in the head. Not after their deal, trading janitorial work for office work. No, they were at the very least friends now, and Rachel had to live with that, and the very act of being friends with XR kept reminding her of what was good about him, and what made her admire him, which clashed so horribly with when he did things like this – said things like that –

           The sound of a flushing toilet. A woman exited the stall and fixed a rather disgruntled look upon Rachel, who was silenced sheepishly as the woman began to wash her four hands. Perhaps, Rachel realized, it would’ve been a good idea to check the restroom for occupants before pacing around it singing lyrics like “IS IT LOVE? IS IT LOVE? OR JUST THE DRUGS PULSING IN MY VEINS?”

           The singing had worked a little bit, anyway. There was no reason for Rachel to be that angry. Her friend was a womanizer-wannabe, he’d managed to find someone his charms temporarily worked on by the sheer scope of trying them on everyone, they’d had a moment, she wanted someone else all along. No big deal. This was just Rachel’s problem. Pining made a person overreact.

           Jealous of getting the attention he did, indeed.

           There were things you just didn’t say, even if it turned out you were right about them.

           Shortly after the other woman left the restroom, Rachel did the same, practically colliding with Buzz Lightyear as she did so. After both gave a “Whoa!” and backed off, Rachel was reminded of the other problem.

           “I, uh…” Buzz began, “I just wanted to make sure, you know, that you were okay.”

           “I’m fine,” Rachel said with a forced smile. “Who doesn’t get fed up with their teammates every once in a while?”

           “Even I know that feeling,” Buzz admitted with a smile, “though don’t tell them that.”

           “I’m sorry I didn’t say anything,” Rachel blurted. “When Bonnie was doing…the stuff she was doing.”

           “What do you have to be sorry for?” Buzz asked. “Like I said: the damsel-in-distress syndrome. Besides, the more I think about it, the more I wonder if taking her up on the whole date thing wouldn’t actually be that bad of an idea.”

           Rachel flinched. “Buzz, do you even LIKE her?”

           “What’s not to like about Bonnie Lepton?” Buzz asked. “She’s a confident woman who sees the good in people. Everyone should like her!”

           “No. I’m asking if you LIKE her. YOU KNOW HOW I MEAN.”

           “Well, uh…” Buzz met Rachel’s piercing gaze with a rather hollow look. “Not right now, but you never know. Things can happen.”

           “Are you thinking about asking her out because she PESTERED you?”

           “She wasn’t pestering!” Buzz argued. “She happens to have a mild crush on me – “

           “A MILD crush.”

           “ – and there’s a chance we’re compatible, and this will make her happy!” Buzz insisted.

           “Yeah, but…she makes you REALLY uncomfortable,” Rachel argued. “Don’t tell me I’m wrong. I SAW you two.”

           “It wasn’t that bad!” Buzz argued.

           “I’m just afraid that if you give in because she bothered you into it,” Rachel told him, “then you’re gonna end up even more uncomfortable. Or just hurt.”

           “Listen, Rachel,” Buzz said patiently, “I’m a grown man. I can take care of myself. It’s gonna take more than a bad date to hurt me. It doesn’t even take EVIL EMPEROR ZURG to hurt me!”

           “I’m just trying to look out for you, okay?” Rachel insisted. “I know you can take care of yourself, but…I get worried. It’s what I do. She shouldn’t have put that kind of pressure on you. It isn’t RIGHT. Even I…”

           And here’s why it really wasn’t that easy. She’d known it since the Petra incident.

           “…I had this guy I liked, once,” she said meekly. “A lot. But I knew he wasn’t interested in me at all. And I NEVER wanted to put him through what Bonnie’s putting you through. Even if it was hard having to see him and keep it all bottled up. I just…I can’t – couldn’t do that to him. Even if he was an asshole who deserved a little punishment sometimes.” She sighed. “If you wanna go out with Bonnie, that’s fine. I just don’t want this to go wrong for you.”

           “I’ll be fine,” Buzz assured her. “I appreciate the concern, though. You’ve got a good heart.”

           “Yeah, yeah.” Rachel made to head back to the table. “Let’s go get our food. They probably brought my spurfion rings, and I’m starving.”

           “Rachel.”

           She paused, her back turned to Buzz. Her head swiveled to get a good look at him.

           Candidly, Buzz stated, “Any guy who wouldn’t see how amazing you are is a MORON.”

           She said the only thing she could say: “That’s exactly the problem.”

           He didn’t ask, so she didn’t elaborate. They returned to the booth, where their orders were in fact waiting, and it seemed that already, Rachel had missed the time-honored ritual where XR had attempted to casually steal a spurfion ring off her plate only to remember the hard way, yet again, that he wasn’t able to consume food. She gave this the barest acknowledgement, re-taking her seat by the window and making a point of not looking directly at XR for the rest of the meal.

           Buzz began to spell out his ideas for the date he was planning with Bonnie: “So I was thinking I’d take her to good old Cosmic Crunchies – “

           “Buzz,” XR sighed, “I thought the point was that you were treating her like a grown-up. That COMPLETELY defeats the purpose. Also, Cosmic Crunchies? Really? How old are YOU, again?”

           Rachel just barely managed to disguise her inappropriately-placed laugh as a cough. Curse him. (Though now was obviously a bad time to say that she herself wouldn’t be opposed to Cosmic Crunchies, so she kept that one secret.)

           Buzz laid out the rest of his plans, and Rachel couldn’t help but think that this was about to go terribly, horribly wrong.

***

           Things had gone about as badly as Rachel could have predicted if not worse. Lepton (or “von Madman,” as he preferred, apparently) had somehow enlarged himself to monumental proportions, solidified his crystal shell, and carried Bonnie off into the city. By the time the majority of the squad arrived on scene, it seemed all that was left of Buzz was a Buzz-shaped imprint in the ground.

           “Poor Buzz,” Booster whimpered, looking at the site of the damage, “he’s gone!”

           “Life will be so empty without him,” XR moaned.

           “I can’t believe – “ Rachel attempted.

           “By the way,” XR interrupted, “who gets his car?”

           “Wow,” Rachel huffed. “Mr. Sensitivity, aren’t you?”

           Thankfully, Buzz hadn’t actually been crushed, crawling up out of where he’d been punched into the floor. Booster excitedly plucked him from the indent, crying, “YOU’RE ALIVE!”

           Rachel let out a sigh of absolute relief.

           Buzz wrenched himself from one of Booster’s bone-crushing hugs, barreling toward the edge of the rooftop where they had all gathered to try to intercept Lepton (or “von Madman”…apparently) as he barked, “No time for mushy stuff, rangers! Madman is loose!”

           “Hey, yeah, about that?” Rachel called after Buzz as he barreled to the edge of the rooftop. “Just thought maybe we should discuss how this is related to what we talked about earlier regarding – “

           “No time for that either!” Buzz called back as he made a flying leap off the building.

           Rachel all but deflated as the rest of the team followed. Eventually, she mustered up the willpower to give chase. If he’d just listened to her, none of this would be happening, she thought.

           A direct attack on Lepton (“von Madman,” apparently) failed thrice in a row, and the blasts of pure energy he emitted to attempt to eliminate Team Lightyear en masse ended up causing collateral damage when they missed. Buzz’s argument that he and Bonnie were on a date rolled off Lepton (“von Madman,” apparently)’s back like water off a duck.

           “Seriously,” Rachel groaned, “this can NOT get any – “

           “DON’T,” XR warned, “SAY IT.”

           That was when Lepton (“von Madman,” apparently) commandeered the city’s main generator and erupted into titanic size.

           “That had NOTHING to do with what I just said!” Rachel barked as the group landed on another nearby rooftop to assess.

           “Oh, really?” XR countered. “Haven’t I warned you about what happens EVERY TIME ANYONE SAYS THOSE WORDS?”

           “It’s a coincidence,” Rachel grunted.

           “This and every other time?”            “It has not happened every single time.”

           “NINETY TIMES out of the past NINETY-FIVE that someone has said ‘this can’t get any worse,’” XR pointed out, “it has GOTTEN WORSE.”

           “You kept TRA – “ Rachel shook her head. “Of course you kept track.”

           “Plan?” Mira asked. “Anybody got a plan? Because we could REALLY use a plan right now.”

           Buzz surveyed the generator before making his decision: “It’s up to you, XR. You’ve gotta reach the cutoff valve. We’ll stall him.”

           “I’m sorry,” Rachel broke in, “XR does what?”            “I agree,” XR repeated; “XR does what? One false move, and someone could be blown to bits! Maybe me!”

           “That’s why it’s up to you,” Buzz insisted, giving the robot a gentle push toward the edge of the roof.

           “Ummm…I don’t like this plan,” Rachel argued. “I REALLY don’t like this plan.”

           “But if anything happens to XR,” Booster reminded her, “he can just be rebuilt.”

           “I thought you were mad at him anyway about the Bonnie thing,” Mira whispered in Rachel’s ear.

           “I am,” Rachel hissed back. “That doesn’t mean I have to like the plan where he’s required to make the suicide move.”

           “Then which one of us SHOULD make that move?”

           “Uh…” Rachel had no answer for that.

           “It’s not ideal,” Mira reminded her, “but it’s our only play.”

           “Fine,” Rachel huffed. “But I want to remind EVERYONE LISTENING HERE that we would have to go through NONE OF THIS if Buzz had just NOT CAVED TO BEING PESTERED BY A WOMAN HE DIDN’T LIKE!”

           “We would have to go through none of this,” Buzz countered, “if Lepton – “

           “Von Madman, apparently,” Rachel broke in.

           “If Lepton hadn’t pushed the limits of his research too far,” Buzz concluded. “Now let’s MOVE!”

           Four blasted off; Buzz, Mira, and Booster made a beeline for Lepton (“von Madman,” apparently)’s line of vision while XR made a break for the assigned valve. Rachel stared after them all in exasperation for a solid thirty seconds before yelling, “WHEN DID THE I-TOLD-YOU-SO SQUAD BECOME THE I-TOLD-YOU-SO RACHEL?”

           Then, knowing full well what she had to do, she blasted off to join the diversion effort.

           Buzz tried to appeal to Lepton’s humanity. Mira argued that Bonnie needed a normal life. Rachel knew she had to chip in her two cents, to be as loud as ever in order to draw attention, but her eyes kept darting over to the valve, where XR was suctioning his way up the generator. He’ll be fine, she told herself. If he gets smashed, we just piece him back together again. And after hitting on Bonnie, he deserves to be smashed anyway. Multiple times, in fact.

           She turned back to Lepton. “BONNIE’S DOING JUST FINE!” she argued. “THERE ARE WAY WORSE GUYS SHE COULD’VE PICKED THAN BUZZ LIGHTYEAR! AND SHE LOVES YOU! WHY WON’T – “

           A faint, metallic scream. Rachel was cut off midsentence. She whipped to look; XR had somehow gotten one arm wrapped up in the valve, then had that arm accidentally extended so he was dangling off the tower. Not that this is my problem, Rachel insisted to herself. Typical of him, anyway.

           “DR. LEPTON!” Booster added. “YOU HAVE TO LISTEN TO – “

           The glow of the crystals dimmed. Perhaps, Rachel thought, Lepton (“von Madman,” apparently) had decided to take their words to heart, to give up his power grab –

           Or perhaps XR falling halfway down the tower and screaming had alerted him to what the team was trying to do.

           Yes. Definitely that second one.

           A low growl formed in the scientist’s throat. He balled up one enormous hand into a boulder-esque fist.

           I am absolutely not getting involved, Rachel told herself. This is not my problem.

           The minute she finished that thought, she blasted off.

           She intercepted XR before Lepton (“von Madman,” apparently) could shatter him. Seeing as Rachel hadn’t really planned this, acting more upon instinct than anything else, she didn’t exactly focus on keeping airborne, and the sudden added weight of an entire robot in her arms drove her path in a decidedly downward direction. She did, however, have the presence of mind to roll over in midair as the pavement loomed. After all, she hadn’t risked her life to stop Lepton (“von Madman,” apparently) from shattering XR only for him to get dashed on the road.

           Rachel landed on her back, slamming into the pavement hard, and the subsequent shooting pain in her right shoulder informed her that this had been a very bad idea. Unbidden, a shriek escaped from her lips. As XR positioned himself to standing, she sat up agonizingly, still whimpering from the shooting pain running through her shoulder.

           “Whoa, nice save!” XR told her. “If you hadn’t done that, I would NOT have come out of that in one piece aaaaaaaaand you didn’t come out of that in one piece, did you?”

           So he’d finally noticed that her eyes were misting up with tears. “No SHIT, XR,” she snapped.

           “Oh,” he replied, “wow. Yeah, okay, that…that doesn’t look good. You should DEFINITELY get that checked out.”

           “Oh, God,” she moaned, “don’t tell me it’s broken. Is it out of place?”

           “Well, it’s hard to say at this point, but – what EXACTLY are you worried is broken?”

           “MY FUCKING SHOULDER,” Rachel growled, immediately regretting her harsh tone the moment it had come out – though, in her defense, the fact that her shoulder might have, in fact, been broken wasn’t doing her temperament any favors. “What did you THINK?”

           “How would you expect ME to know?” XR replied. “All I know is the look on your face is NOT the look of a person who doesn’t need medical attention.”

           Rachel’s gaze was diverted upward; Buzz, Mira, and Booster had tried and failed to engage Lepton (“von Madman,” apparently) in direct hand-to-hand combat, and now the crystalline villain had leapt off the generator, stalking Buzz down.

           “We can’t stay here,” Rachel grunted as she used her left hand to pivot into a standing position less than gracefully.

           “You’re telling me!” XR cried, seizing Rachel’s hand and making a break for it –

           Her right hand.

           He let go after she shrieked even more piercingly. “THAT WAS THE SHOULDER,” she yelled.

           “Again,” he retorted, “HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT?”

           “Just RUN, dumbass!”

           They bolted, Rachel’s shoulder feeling no better as time elapsed. Once they’d reached what seemed to be a safe distance, they observed the grand finale playing out.

           The entire generator was destroyed in the melee, but it was Bonnie herself who struck the final blow, dealing a hit to Lepton (“von Madman,” apparently)’s weak spot on his chest and bringing him back down to humanity. Rachel would’ve fist-pumped in Bonnie’s honor if she weren’t still distracted by the burning in her shoulder.

           “You think it’s safe?” she asked after Lepton (no longer “von Madman,” apparently), Bonnie, Buzz, Mira, and Booster had been conversing for some time.

           “You can NEVER be too careful,” XR told her. “Luckily, I can assess the situation by reading their lips from this distance.” After a moment of observation, he muttered, “Pretty sure he just said ‘Donut candelabra’ – “

           “Okay, no, that’s not gonna work.” Rachel made her way to the others, every curse she knew firing off in her brain as a result of the shoulder. Fuck Lepton, she thought, for making me have to do that. Fuck Buzz for not listening to me. And fuck XR in particular for being the exact reason my shoulder is probably wrecked.

           “How do we know we can trust you?” Buzz was asking Lepton as Rachel approached.

           “I promise,” Lepton replied.

           That seemed to be where it ended, prompting Rachel to say, “Oh, that’s IT? We’re going to trust him just like THAT?”

           “It really wasn’t his fault,” Bonnie asserted. “The crystals were affecting his brain.”

           Rachel wasn’t sure how far that explanation would fly. After all, substance abuse could make people act severely out of character, but she was under the impression Lepton had at least some control over his actions. Then again, she wasn’t the judge or the jury here. That honor fell to Buzz, so she looked at him.

           “Well, uh, okay,” Buzz stated. “After the LGMs CLEAR him.”

           Rachel could accept that. Whatever misgivings she had, Buzz had yet to be wrong when it came to judging character.

           “And if you’ll, uh…let us finish our…y’know, ahhh…” he sputtered.

           “Dinner date?” Bonnie finished.

           So that was still on, Rachel thought to herself.

           “Right,” Buzz confirmed. “What she said.”

           Rachel might as well accept this. Maybe Buzz actually did have feelings for Bonnie that went beyond pitying her pestering. Maybe this would actually go somewhere. After all, it wasn’t like things could get –

           No. She was not about to become statistic ninety-six. Not even mentally.

           “YAY!” Booster cried, doing a small jump for joy. “Everything worked out PERFECT! Great job, everyone!” He gave Mira’s left shoulder and Rachel’s right shoulder a simultaneous, hearty clap.

           Which got Rachel to scream again, putting all eyes on her. That jolt had hit hard, and now she was crying again, which she really resented.

           “Are you okay?” Mira asked in concern.

           “No,” Rachel answered softly, at least feeling a little better that Mira’s response was so caring. “I think I broke my fucking shoulder.”

           “Uh, yeahhhhh,” XR confirmed (when had he gotten here? Rachel bristled at his presence). “I hate to break up the happy family reunion, but we have a ranger that needs a trip to the ER, stat.”

           “And whose fault is that?” Rachel growled.

           “Ranger,” Buzz reminded her, “I specifically assigned XR to that valve because he could take the risk of damage without any lasting effects.”

           That, Rachel couldn’t argue with. Maybe the person she should be angry with was herself. Her eyes flicked downward to the pavement.

           “Still, that was an admirable display of loyalty for your fellow ranger,” Buzz told her. “I can’t get too mad at you for wanting to protect your teammate and friend. Even if he is infinitely more durable than you are.” He took three steps to get right in front of Rachel. “We’re going to get you back to base for an examination of that shoulder.” Pivoting, he said, “Sorry, Bonnie, but – “

           “No,” Rachel said quickly. “Don’t. I don’t need the whole squad to go with me. You’re on a date. Go enjoy it.”

           “You, uhhhh…” Buzz regarded Rachel with confusion. “You WANT me to be on a date with Bonnie?”

           “If that’s what your heart wants,” she replied, “then – no. Forget it. Just – you’re an adult too. This is your decision.”

           “All right,” Buzz told her. Then: “Mira! Booster! XR! Take Rachel back to the Star Command med bay, and watch that shoulder.”

           “Right!” Mira responded.

           “Righty-o, Buzz!” Booster agreed.

           “Consider her shoulder WATCHED,” XR concluded.

           Rachel didn’t want to see him. She didn’t want to be anywhere near him. Logically, she was aware that this was completely her fault, but she wanted to pin the blame on XR for making her care, for not caring back, and for unwittingly orchestrating this entire situation without a clue.

           Though, that was the thing: unwittingly. He had no way of knowing how angry it made her to see him so casually trying to pick up Bonnie. He had no way of knowing anything. It was all on her. On her, on her, on her –

           “So, uh, Rach?”

           They’d all begun walking back to cruiser 42, and there he was, right on cue. Rachel looked down to meet XR’s eyes, dealing him a very sour look.

           “I reaaaaaaaally owe you one for this,” he told her.

           She flinched, surprised. Touched, even. It was only one sentence, and she had no idea if he’d even follow up, but it went miles toward making things better.

 ***

           “You did WHAT?”

           Rachel sat on an examination bed, the LGMs crawling about to observe every part of her body they could assess. She was now clad in a loose-fitting tunic and pants rather than her suit; getting them on around her shoulder was more hassle than she’d have liked. The hurting hadn’t subsided; she’d just gotten used to it. Somewhat.

           Mira, Booster, and XR were hanging back against the wall, watching the examination go down with concern plastered on all of their faces. Nebula was overseeing, and it was he who was less than happy with Rachel.

           “I said,” Rachel sighed, “I hurt my shoulder in a rescue attempt.”

           “WHOSE RESCUE ATTEMPT?”

           “…XR’s,” she admitted. “I was trying to stop XR from getting shattered by von Madman.” It sounded even worse when she said it out loud.

           “Ranger!” Nebula cried – yes, he was angered, but Rachel could still tell from his tone that it stemmed from a place of worry – “XR is literally built to be destroyed and reconstructed! His name stands for ‘Expendable Ranger’!”

           “Experimental,” Rachel said without thinking. “It’s ‘Experimental Ranger.’”

           She heard a mutter from the wall of “You know you’re in trouble when Dad uses your FULL name…”

           “If XR gets blown to bits,” Nebula continued, “we can just build him again from the ground up! We CAN’T do that with YOU! You aren’t replaceable! What if you’d been killed pulling off that maneuver?”

           “I know,” Rachel said softly. “I was being a dumbass.”

           “LANGUAGE, ranger!”

           “Sorry.”

           Nebula sighed. “This could’ve been a lot worse. I just don’t wanna see you get hurt permanently from making any more reckless decisions!”

           “I’ll play it safer,” Rachel said sheepishly. “I promise.”

           “You better. I don’t wanna lose you from the ranks!”

           That statement probably should’ve made Rachel feel better, warmer and fuzzier, but it ultimately didn’t do anything to reduce the size of the swirling pit in her stomach. Now she was here having to dance around the fact that she’d nearly gotten herself killed over an unrequited crush, and she was saying this to the head honcho himself. How could she possibly convey to him that she just couldn’t stand seeing XR put in what for an organic would be mortal danger – especially when Nebula was incredibly right and she’d just injured herself needlessly?

           “Finished assessment!” one of the LGMs announced.

           “What’s the prognosis?” Nebula asked.

           “Not broken!” the LGM declared. “Sprain!”  

           Rachel let out a sigh of relief at that.

           “Well, that could’ve been worse,” Nebula remarked. “That can be patched up with a simple enough operation. After that, you’ll have to stay off duty for two weeks.”            “TWO WEEKS?” Rachel shrieked. “No. NO. I can’t be off duty for two weeks. Zurg will attack, Torque will run another prison break, NOS-4-A2 will go on a murder spree, this will probably ALL HAPPEN WITHIN THE SAME DAY, and I HAVE TO BE THERE!”

           “Two weeks, ranger,” Nebula barked, “and that’s an order!”

           All considered, two weeks probably wasn’t bad. Rachel thought she’d heard once that in the old days, before medical technology had advanced to this point, a sprain could have a person out for a month or two. That was unthinkable.

           “Get her under,” Nebula demanded. “I want her patched on the double. The sooner she can start the recuperation period, the sooner she can finish.”

           “On the double!” several of the LGMs chorused.

           She was whisked away before anyone could say anything more. Though she did catch the fading sound of Booster saying, “Gosh, two whole weeks? That’s gonna be tough!” and Mira responding, “Yeah. Poor Rachel. I just can’t – “

           They were out of earshot before Rachel could hear whether the one most closely tied to this little debacle had anything to say.

           Maybe that was for the best.

 ***

           Since Team Lightyear was on active duty, the four who didn’t have Grade II shoulder sprains remained at base. Rachel, however, was confined to bed in her and Mira’s shared apartment.

           “You gonna be okay?” Mira had asked before leaving.

           “Yeah,” Rachel sighed.

           “You don’t sound convinced,” Mira pointed out.

           “Mira,” Rachel reminded her, “I just sprained my fucking shoulder saving an invincible person from a non-fatal experience because of a misguided and one-sided crush. I am as fine as I’m gonna get.”

           “Well…” Mira shrugged. “At least your heart was in the right place?”

           “I just…hate seeing him get hurt,” Rachel replied. “But don’t tell him that. I am REALLY mad at him now.”

           “Lips are zipped!” Mira promised. “Okay. I really do have to get going. Anything I can get you before I leave?”

           “Nah,” Rachel replied. “I can at least get to the kitchen and back. That’s all I’m gonna need.”

           “’Kay,” Mira said. “I’m heading out.”

           “Have fun!” Rachel told Mira, mustering up a small show of happiness.

           “As much fun as I can on Tanker Alley duty,” Mira said with a wink. “Be GLAD you’re missing this one.”

           Then Rachel’s roommate was gone, and Rachel was left alone to stew. Which she did in silence for about half an hour. Then, realizing she needed to take proactive steps toward not spending two weeks in a swamp of self-pity, she picked up the remote on the bedside table, flicking on the television and opening up the streaming selection.

           Her heart skipped a beat when she realized that Bulletproof Hearts: Despair Days had updated by two episodes without her even noticing. That would kill some time and put her mind on something more positive. Would today be the day that Spice Skomaru would finally figure out the mastermind behind the evil horde? Would her premonition of the future finally be given context?

           Before Rachel could click the episode into playing, there was a ring at the doorbell.

           Solicitors, she thought, or door-to-door religious converters asking her if she’d heard of the gospel of Narflak. So she ignored it.

           Only for the doorbell to ring again. And again. And again and again and again and again –

           “God dammit,” Rachel muttered as she slid out of bed. At least her pajamas were conservative; if she had to answer the door to sign for a package or anything, she wouldn’t have to worry about the delivery person seeing more than they should. Almost to the door, she had the presence of mind to test the waters by calling out, “WHO’S THERE?”

           “ROOM SERVICE!”

           She knew that voice. She would be able to pick that voice out of a crowd of one thousand. And there was absolutely no reason for the owner of that voice to be here, now.

           In utter disbelief, Rachel opened the door –

           And XR breezed into the apartment, nearly knocking her over. “Worry not!” he proclaimed. “Nurse XR is here to tend to your every need!”

           Rachel could only stare at him dumbfoundedly.

           He shifted from a chipper demeanor to staring her down (insofar as a person could do from a two foot height difference), hands on where hips would have been on a person. “Shouldn’t you be in bed, missy?”

           She regained her ability to counter. “If I was in bed, I wouldn’t have been able to open the door, dumbass.”

           “I don’t wanna hear aaaaaany more excuses! Back to bed! Go on! Scoot!”

           Wondering if she was actually asleep and having a fever dream, Rachel obeyed, walking back into the bedroom and climbing back into the bed – ever more thankful that her pajamas didn’t show much off.

           XR followed her into the bedroom, pausing just before the bed to pop his drawer and rummage about in it. “Let’s see here,” he muttered, “I brought one fleece blanket – don’t ask where I got it – one very fluffy pillow – don’t ask where I got it – one Jo-Adian-sized ice pack – don’t ask where I got it – and several extra-strength painkillers not on your prescription; DEFINITELY don’t ask where I got those.”

           “I, uh…” Rachel realized she had to give in to the nonsense and stop trying to figure out what in the galaxy was happening. “I could use all of those things except the illegal narcotics.”

           “You see, I THOUGHT you might feel that way,” XR remarked, “so I’m just gonna leave them in the drawer in case you want them later – “

           “PLEASE DO NOT LEAVE ILLEGAL NARCOTICS IN MY APARTMENT WHERE THEY COULD BE FOUND ON A SWEEP,” Rachel said fiercely.

           “Fine,” XR said haughtily, replacing the bag of variously sized and multicolored pills in his drawer. “I’ll keep them with ME unless you change your mind. But if you want them while I’m on mission tomorrow, that’s just too bad for you.”

           It took Rachel a moment to stop thinking about how she was already on thin ice for the antidepressants hidden at the bottom of the panty drawer and realize what he’d just said. “On mission…tomorrow? Don’t you have one TODAY? Tanker Alley?”

           “About that,” XR replied. “I put in a word with Commander Nebula and I just so happened to mention that I am VERY behind on my paperwork. I have literally MOUNTAINS of reports to file. So I got a free pass for the day in order to get a head start on those hours and hours’ worth of reports that need filing.”

           That didn’t exactly clear things up. “So…why are you – “

           “Hours and hours’ worth of reports,” XR clarified, “that I’m NOT GOING TO DO.”

           “Oh,” Rachel realized. “Wait. So you lied to get a whole day off to – “

           “Stop you from going insane having no one to talk to, yes.”

           “You say that like talking to you doesn’t inherently make me more insane.”

           “Har-dee-har.”

           “Did Booster and Mira guilt you into this?” Rachel asked.

           “Guilt?” XR repeated. “No! No-ho-hooooo! Not one bit! True, they MIGHT have mentioned on separate occasions that because you got that sprain trying to protect me, that means I’m INDIRECTLY responsible for your injury, in the TECHNICAL sense, but there is no GUILT here. All sincerity, this wasn’t their idea anyway. It was mine.”

           “Why?” Rachel asked, dumbfounded.

           “Because, like I said,” he reminded her, “I owe you one. One VERY BIG one. And I’m paying you back right now. Now hang on juuuuuuust a minute – “

           He breezed around the room, throwing the blanket on top of Rachel and suddenly getting on the bed on her left side to tip her forward and settle the pillow and the absolutely enormous ice pack, and she barely had time to register how erratic her heartbeat became for that moment. Then he was back on the floor, and Rachel had to admit she was much more comfortable.

           “You don’t have to do this,” she told him. “I mean, yeah, you do owe me one, but I’m fine. I’m not gonna go stir-crazy. There are new eps of Despair Days, and – “

           XR shot a glance at the television. “Bulletproof Hearts?” he realized. “Now THERE’S a nostalgia trip. Are we gathering research for more fanfictions?”

           “Let it die.”

           “The files may be deleted, but the memories remain, Rach. Distinct memories of Vexyrian, Romyx, and oatmeal.”

           “I DON’T EVEN SHIP THEM ANYMORE!” Rachel cried, a bit too loudly.

           “What was this even about, anyway?” XR asked.

           “Despair Days?” Rachel answered. “It’s a spinoff, actually. It focuses on Spice Skomaru, who’s Red’s half-sister. See, Spice has the ability to predict the future, and that put a bunch of hitmen on her. So when Nort figured out about her powers, he captured her and put her in isolation on an ice planet filled with robots who seem to be brainwashed to try and kill her, but she escaped, and now she’s trying to make her way through the frozen wasteland with – “ She realized she’d been infodumping. “It’s basically the same kind of drama as the main series.”

           “That summary doesn’t actually help me,” XR replied. “See, when I asked, I meant what the WHOLE THING was about.”

           Rachel gave him an utterly dumbfounded look. “You…don’t know what Bulletproof Hearts is about.”

           “Not a clue.”

           “We went through that whole incident of you trying to turn my old fanfictions into erotic fiction, and YOU DIDN’T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE SHOW WAS ABOUT.”

           “I was aiming to make transformative work! Did I NEED to know what the show was about?”

           “Oh my God,” Rachel sighed. “Bulletproof Hearts is – it’s simultaneously the best and worst piece of fiction of our generation. It’s my LIFE. It’s my OBSESSION. And you DON’T KNOW WHAT IT’S ABOUT.”

           “Well, forgive me if the summaries of episodes of a television drama aren’t logged in Star Command’s database!”

           Another heavy sigh from Rachel before she launched into another infodump: “So Bulletproof Hearts is about these kids who go to an academy to train for fighting evil. Like our academy – well, the academy Buzz, Mira, and Booster went to – but the fantasy version for younger teens who have weirder weapons. They’re divided into four teams that do assignments together, but all sixteen are best friends. The problem is the evil Nort and his flunkies want to challenge the gods and bring the light of hope and the darkness of despair into a clash that will remake the world, so they have to travel around to different planets, get wrapped up in the adventures of the locals, and put together the pieces of how to stop Nort. The problem is that Nort’s right-hand general, Monokrome, tempts them on every planet with a reason to kill each other off, and every so often, she succeeds and one of the kids ends up killing another, and they all have to work together to figure out who the murderer is. The main character, Red Kazora, is seriously my favorite. Like, he’s perfect. He’s this geeky mechanic type who starts out with major trust issues but then kinda falls in platonic love with everybody and makes friends at first sight. His best friend, Snow Hajiku, is more of the deadpan snarky type who seems cold at first, but their dynamic is just SO perfect, and they’re SO in love. Though, actually, Red’s canon love interest is Victory Chiakairi, who has a really troubled past because she – well, that’s a spoiler. But the thing is, she came from – no, that’s also a spoiler. But the whole fan treatment of Victory is complicated because – fuck. Spoiler. Wait. Why am I dancing around spoilers? You are NEVER going to watch this fucking show.”

           “I wouldn’t say NEVER!” XR argued. “Now I want to know what my best-seller was going to be based on! Also, you made it sound kind of interesting just now.” He looked back to the television. “You’ve got it streaming?”

           “It’s all on demand,” Rachel confirmed. “What, you want to binge it with me?”

           Had she seriously just invited him to do that? In her defense, he had all but suggested it himself!

           “Well, we have a whole day together, don’t we?” XR reminded her. “Fire it up.”

           “XR, this show has a LOT of lore. It’s SUPER fucking complicated. There is a RUNNING FANDOM JOKE about how the plot is overcomplicated and doesn’t make sense to anyone except hardcore fans.”

           “Are you saying I can’t keep up with a TV show plot?”

           “That is exactly what I’m saying,” Rachel stated.

           “Well,” XR replied, “CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.”

           In one movement, he had hoisted himself onto the bed next to Rachel’s left side, and the ice pack was overclocking keeping her body temperature down from the proximity. He reclined back on the pillow on that side, hands tucked behind his helmet.

           “Okay,” Rachel said, “but don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

           The problem about showing your special-interest fandom to the guy you liked, who really didn’t seem all that interested in fantasy fiction in the first place, was that if he didn’t end up liking it, you either had to doubt the integrity of your feelings for the fiction or your feelings for the guy. Both of which really deserved to be questioned, in her case, Rachel realized. This may very well have been the worst decision of her life.

           Second worst, come to think of it, after getting her shoulder sprained trying to save an immortal robot from getting smashed.

           If being attracted to XR was at all her decision, of course, that would be a solid first worst.

           Still, she cued up the pilot episode, tense in anticipation of XR’s reaction. “Oh, by the way,” she mentioned, “I’ve seen this, like, a hundred times, so if I start saying the lines out loud along with the characters, smack me on the back of the head.”

           “Duly noted. No takesies-backsies on that.”

           A click of the remote and they were off.

           Two hours in, there was a bowl on Rachel’s lap from which she casually ate popcorn while answering the early-season questions every Bulletproof Hearts rookie had:

           “So…Noir hates Snow because…”

           “Spoiler.”

           “Am I picking up that Amarillo is hiding something?”            “Yes.”

           “What’s Snow’s specialty again?”            “It was never said because you’re not supposed to know.”

           “I don’t trust Castella.”

           “WAIT FOR IT.”

           It occurred to Rachel eventually that XR was not only miraculously following the plot of Bulletproof Hearts, but getting invested in it. That was a load off. This wasn’t going to be so bad after all.

 ***

           “I’m starting to see what you mean about Red and Snow. Seriously, just KISS already.”

           “THANK YOU.”

           “Though Red and Victory aren’t bad either.”

           “Just so long as you don’t ship Red with Castella Komisa.”

           “People do that?”            “People do that. And it is the literal worst. Besides, Reynard is right there! Why WOULDN’T you put Castella with Reynard?”

           “Not seeing THAT chemistry.”

           “Right. That’s not until episode seven. Just hang in there.”

 ***

           “So THAT’S your boy toy.”

           “ROMYX IS NOT MY BOY TOY.”

           “You’re into mullets and eyeliner?”

           “No I’m – are you going to make fun of me and Romyx or are you going to watch how actually good of a villain Romyx is?”

           “I’m a robot. I’m built to multitask.”

***

           “Geez, they wasted no time killing off Romyx, did they?”

           “Yeah. He’s kind of an intro villain.”

           “Does he come back?”

           “No.”

           “That’s ALL HE DOES?”

           “Yes.”

           “Why do you like HIM so much? He barely did anything!”

           “BUT HE DID IT WITH SWAG. NOW SHUT UP.”

 ***

           “Well, well, THERE’S a familiar name. …Wait, are you telling me Romyx and Vexyrian never meet?”            “Not onscreen, but they both worked for Nort, so obviously – “

           “And you wrote such PASSIONATE romance between them.”

           “Is this Relive Rachel’s Most Embarrassing Hits hour? No. No it’s not.”

           “Now, you see, THIS guy, I can get into as a villain. THIS guy has the chops. And unlike Romyx, he’s actually gonna stick around.”

           “Uh…yeah.”

 ***

           “Rach.”

           “Yeah.”

           “All the villains you love die.”

           “I know.”

           “Everything you touch dies.”

           “Yes it does.”

           “I mean, I guess this is something Romyx and Vexyrian actually have in common: they both die WAY too quickly.”

           “AHA! SO NOW YOU ADMIT ROMYX WAS GONE TOO SOON!”

           “GONE TOO SOON TO ACTUALLY BE A CHARACTER!”

 ***

           The popcorn bowl was refilled.

 ***

           “Well, here’s news for you,” Rachel muttered under her breath along with the villain of the hour. “You’re crying over Noir dying, but she isn’t dead. Because you can’t kill anything that never existed – HEY!”

           She had received the lightest, most playful cuff on the back of the head from a metal hand.

           “You told me to do that,” XR told her as he faced the screen, deliberately avoiding her look of playful scorn. “And you agreed to no takesies-backsies.”

 ***

           “Sooooo…is now the wrong time to tell you that I actually do think Red is best off with Castella?”

           “THAT’S IT. OUT. OUT OF MY APARTMENT NOW. RIGHT NOW. LEAVE THE ICE PACK.”

 ***

           Sniffle. “Rach…when you tell this story later…you don’t tell anyone I cried over Victory.”

           “Secret’s safe with me. I cried the first time I saw it, too.”

           “She was – she had so much potential! She was so innocent!”

           “I know. And it was just the most BULLSHIT death, too.”

           “What kind of a HEARTLESS MONSTER is writing this stuff?”

           “I might actually invite you onto my BH forum after this.”

           “…You’re on a forum?”

           “…Maybe.”            “Do you still write – “

           “NO! Also, you’re disinvited from the forum.”

           “Well, THAT’S telling. Looks like I have another pen name to go looking for.”

           “NO YOU DO NOT.”

 ***

           “…WHAT?”

           “Yes. YEEEEEES.”

           “You’re telling me…this whole time…Braigel was…”

           “YES! HE WAS! OH MY GOD, I HAVE NEVER ACTUALLY SEEN ANYONE GET BLINDSIDED BY THAT REVEAL IN REAL LIFE! DO YOU KNOW HOW SATISFYING THIS IS?”

           “This…explains a few things and yet raises SO many more questions than it answers.”

           “WELCOME TO BULLETPROOF HEARTS.”

 ***

           “I never said thank you, did I?”

           Rachel didn’t realize, at first, that this wasn’t a comment on the show. “I’M not the one who froze Ashe to death.”

           “Not convinced she’s dead, but that’s not what I meant.”

           “How could she have survived that?” Rachel said in an attempt to disguise the very obvious plot twist being set up. “And what ARE you talking about?”

           “Just this whole business saving me from getting crushed by the crystal creep.”

           Rachel froze, not having expected that to come back up. She took a chance to glance over at XR, and sure enough, he was looking at her, not the screen, and her eyes met his softly-glowing yellow lights. She wasn’t sure how to respond at first, but honesty got the better of her: “I just don’t like seeing you get hurt.”

           “And let me tell you, does it SMART,” XR confirmed. “Sure, all it takes is a few screws tightened back in place, but it is a MAJOR inconvenience. Admittedly less of an inconvenience than a Grade II shoulder sprain. Which brings me back to my point: I never said thank you.”

           She could’ve passed off some kind of reassurance and pretended it didn’t matter, or that she hadn’t noticed. But despite him having said he owed her, and owning up in a roundabout way to the fact that her injury was related to him, he hadn’t once said the specific words “thank you.” He knew that. She knew that. He knew she knew that, she knew he knew she knew that, and ad infinitum. “No,” she said. “You didn’t.”

           “Well, I’m saying it now, and you can put this on the record,” XR told her. “Thank you.”

           She almost said “you’re welcome” out of habit, but that would imply that he didn’t actually owe her anything for the save, and if he thought he didn’t owe her anything for the save, they wouldn’t be having as much fun as they were right now. What she ended up with was “Don’t make me do it again, dumbass.”

           “If Buzz didn’t always assign me the life-threatening half of the job or insist on using me as bait, maybe I wouldn’t HAVE to.”

           “Like I keep trying to argue him not to have you do?” She immediately regretted saying that; eventually he would have to figure out that she attempted to look out for him far more than anyone else on the team, and what exactly that meant.

           Yet it seemed to have sailed right over XR’s head. “Next time,” he insisted, “I get the cushy job distracting the villain. HE can shut off the volatile circuit.”

           “He does actually care, you know,” Rachel said quickly, worrying this would get out of hand; she didn’t want to breed a schism in the team by accident. “He just has to make tough decisions. Being team leader does that. I know I couldn’t handle it.”

           “Funny: I KNOW I could handle it. Buuuuuuut I’m not going to gun for the title out of respect.” Which Rachel knew was code for a heavy trust in Buzz’s decision-making and a value of him as a friend.

           “The day you become team leader,” Rachel said with a smirk, “is the day I quit.”

           “The day you quit,” XR replied, “is the day I get your seat on 42. I’ve always wanted the window view.”

           “If you’re at the window, who’s going to run analytics?”

           “Like we NEED analytics. Whatever happened to winging it? Improvising? Making it up as we go?”

           “You’re forgetting one crucial thing, XR.”

           “What? Are you going to try and tell me my analytical skills are irreplaceable and we’d be nowhere without me working in that corner?”

           Yes, Rachel thought. That is true. And I’m incredibly jealous of and impressed by how you’re able to crunch the numbers you do. “No,” she replied mischievously. “In this situation, I quit because you’re the captain, so why are you sitting in MY seat when Buzz’s is yours by default?”

           “Wh – that wasn’t – “

           “Don’t answer: it’s because you’re a dumbass.”

           “Oh, you think you’re so smart,” XR huffed.

           “I don’t think I’m smart,” Rachel replied. “I KNOW I’m smart.”

           “Yeah, well,” XR replied, swiveling his head back to the television, “I’ve got news for you, sister – WHEN DID POSEIDON GET POSSESSED?”

           “Shit,” Rachel hissed. “We’re gonna have to rewind a few scenes.”

           Spitting vitriol at each other felt strangely comfortable. The insults, insincere at this point. All Rachel had really heard was “I never said thank you.” And all XR had really heard was “I just don’t like seeing you get hurt.”

 ***

           It wasn’t until Rachel started waking up that she realized she’d fallen asleep. When had that happened? Without opening her eyes, she took stock of what had happened, trying to recall exactly when she’d wrapped up last night’s binge and kicked out her irritating if charming houseguest.

           Observations: there was a constant stream of noise in the background – the sound of people talking. That was odd. Rachel’s position: propped up rather than laying down, though not as uncomfortable as one would expect, given that her back was against a very soft surface – several pillows, presumably. She’d slumped to the left a stitch, and was leaning on something quite solid.

           That was when it hit. She hadn’t wrapped up the Bulletproof Hearts binge. She’d fallen asleep watching it. That was the noise: an episode still playing. Nor had she sent XR packing. He was still there, and she’d fallen asleep leaning against him.

           Like the crack of a whip, adrenaline surged through Rachel’s body. Her eyes snapped open; she let out an instinct-driven, blood-curdling scream.

           XR had apparently entered sleep mode around the same time she’d dozed off; the sound of the scream jolted his AI out of idling and brought him to consciousness. And when he realized, first of all, that he was being screamed at, and second of all, where he was, his immediate reaction was to let off an almost equally blood-curdling scream.

           The symbiotic scream feedback continued for about a minute before both parties involved finally fell silent, staring at each other in panic.

           Rachel scrambled for the words that were appropriate for this situation. True, it was completely chaste and innocent, but she’d just spent an entire night (how many hours? When, in fact, had she lost consciousness? Now the memories were becoming clearer; they’d both gone way past midnight, their commentary on the show getting increasingly more boisterous until they’d started getting tired) sleeping in the same bed as the man she had a hopeless and ridiculous crush on, and if there was a single part of her epidermis that wasn’t bright pink with a blush right now, she’d have been very surprised. The ice pack was finally spent, so that didn’t help. Her heart seemed about ready to beat itself to death and pop right out through her sternum, thundering in her veins.

           As usual, however, XR had words where others would be speechless. “All right, all right,” he said in a tone that might have sounded breathless if he actually needed to breathe, “just calm down. Yes, apparently we fell asleep like that. But what matters here is that neither of us did, said, or meant anything that would make this at all what it looks like from the outside.” And he was adamant about that.

           Did? Of course not. Said? Nope. Meant? Depended on your definition and whether or not you were referring to something sexual or something simply stirring to the heart. Rachel shoved that aside. “And…nobody saw,” she added. “We’re alone. It’s fine. It’s fine! This isn’t weird!” Her voice cracked, slipping into falsetto. “IT’S NOT WEIRD!” Trying to drown out that accursed heartbeat.

           “No,” XR told her, now perfectly calm and cocky as per usual. “It is most certainly NOT, so you can dial it down a notch.”

           She paused. Bit her lip. Said the next words in a low, semi-chilled tone: “You’re the worst pillow in existence.”

           “Well, if I’d have known I was going to have an organic try and use me as one, I MIGHT have been generous enough to activate an airbag.”

           “I did not TRY – “ Rachel grit her teeth. “Did I go out first or did you?”

           “I don’t remember!” XR protested. “All I know is we ran out of commentary, I’m reading an episode title card, next thing you know, I’m off to dreamland with the electric sheep.”

           Rachel leaned her head back against the wall. “This never happened.”

           “The only thing anyone needs to think I fell asleep on is that mountain of paperwork that’s still sitting on my desk.”

           Rachel flinched. “There’s actual paperwork you’re behind on, isn’t there?”

           “Well, gee, I happen to be DOWN ONE COPY EDITOR, so yes, there is.”

           “I forgot you’d actually have to try and write at at least a third-grade reading level for two weeks.”

           “Excuse you; I’m up to a fourth-grade level at LEAST.”

           Arguing pettily put them back on their usual level. The awkwardness was subsiding, at least on Rachel’s part. On XR’s? She couldn’t read him. He didn’t seem fazed, but was that really a surprise? The bigger surprise was that he hadn’t tried to make some kind of lewd comment out of this. That, once again, brought Rachel to the eternal conundrum of being glad he didn’t obviously ogle her and yet frustrated that she was the only woman he didn’t.

           She glanced over to the clock. “You have to get moving, don’t you?”

           “Well, not for another hour and a half,” he admitted. “If you wanted to yell at one more episode for a palate cleanser. I’m just saying.”

           A cleansed palate was exactly what Rachel needed right now. “I’m down,” she stated. “Where’d you leave off?”

           “Where’d YOU leave off?”            “It literally does not matter,” she reminded him. “I’ve seen this show a hundred times, remember?” She took the remote in hand, barely able to hold it steady with the shaking. How had it gotten this bad again? Less than twenty-four hours ago, they were just lounging with each other on the bed like normal friends, and Rachel had felt less jittery and far more comfortable with XR than she could’ve hoped for at this point. Now that had just been erased like a chalkboard swiped with a soaking sponge. She managed to pause the running television: no mean feat.

           “The last thing I saw was the title card for Funhouse of Horrors,” XR related.

           So she’d gone out first, Rachel realized, but only by a few minutes. Maybe fifteen. Then the topic she should’ve been concerned with immediately sprang to her lips: “Wait. Funhouse of Horrors? THAT episode? Oh, that is NOT an episode you just watch and LEAVE.”

           “I feel like you’re implying I can’t handle it.”

           “IT’S A TERRIBLE CLIFFHANGER.”

           “Please. I eat cliffhangers for breakfast.”

           “That…literally makes no sense, XR.” She flicked through the menu. “But it’s your funeral.”

 ***

           The ending of the episode, as Rachel had predicted, left XR staring slack-jawed (or the equivalent when one’s jaw was hinged) at the screen. She stopped the credits roll, letting him gape in silence for a moment as her smirk grew ever smugger.

           At last, he managed, “Okay. Who did it?”            “Spoilers,” Rachel said mischievously.

           “I mean it,” XR urged. “Who killed Oregano?”

           “SPOI…LERS.”

           “Now you and I both know this is the time when I have to take my leave, as much as I know you’ll miss me.” (You have no idea, Rachel thought.) “Just give me the name of the murderer and I’ll be on my merry way.”

           “I’m not telling you,” Rachel replied. “If you wanna know, you’re gonna have to watch it yourself. You’re IN now, so I’m not going to ruin it.”

           “Okaaaay, new angle. Obviously, you’re not going to tell me who KILLED Oregano, so at least tell me how he DIED.”

           “Nnnnope,” Rachel held out.

           “Come on, you can at least confirm if it was the same person who unleashed the genetically modified ghost army.”

           “No I can’t.” Rachel was enjoying this far too much.

           “Look,” XR practically snapped, “you and I both know that without Oregano’s expertise, none of the rest of them are going to be able to get through that casino-themed torture chamber. Not to mention while they’re all starving to death. And even if they do, Ashe is waiting on the other side with Larxeo, which I have to admit was a REALLY poetic touch, giving her Romyx’s leather jacket like that, REALLY made you feel for the villains for once, but if you’re GOING to leave me on that note, at least tell me WHO…KILLED…OREGANO.”

           Rachel made a motion of zipping her mouth shut and locking it with a padlock.

           “You’re heartless,” XR accused.

           Rachel nodded in affirmation.

           “I’m going to be thinking about this all day,” XR continued as he shifted off the bed, treads hitting the floor. “And if this throws me off my game, it’s gonna be your fault.”

           She dealt him the most wicked grin she could muster.

           “Well, I’m on patrol,” he relented. “What are you gonna do?”

           “Probably catch up on those last two eps of Despair Days,” Rachel answered, “then slip back into a coma for another twelve hours. …A NON-NARCOTIC-INDUCED COMA.”

           “Well, good luck with that,” XR told her. “My work here is done.”

           All she could say at first was “Um, yeah.”

           “And with that,” XR declared jovially, “your doting caretaker bids you adieu.” A playful bow.

           “Wait,” Rachel said before he could leave.

           “Yeeees?”

           This was one of those times when it was hard to drop the banter and just be honest with him. Yet it was crucial. “Thanks for visiting. I had a lot of fun.”

           “The pleasure was mine,” XR replied with a wink. “You know, we should really hang out more often.”

           “For the record, you don’t actually drive me insane to talk to.”

           “I knew that, Rach. And, full disclosure, you’re a real pal, got that?”

           That was almost more meaningful than an I-love-you. “I got it. Now get out of here before I come to my senses and stop being honest.”

           “Consider me gone.”

           And then he was. She heard the apartment door open, then click shut, and Rachel was alone, half wondering if she’d hallucinated the past day.

           Letting herself smile because he really did like her, after all, even if it wasn’t exactly the way she could’ve asked for, and they had just spent hours upon hours together, she went back to the final two episodes she’d been meaning to watch from the beginning.

           The cutoff point ended with exactly as many dangling plot threads as the rest of the show, and that gave Rachel’s mind plenty to grind on as she settled back down into the bed, ready to fall asleep in a more comfortable position and kill as much time as she could that way, now that she had no one to talk to.

           A familiar scent twitched at her nostrils, and it suddenly occurred to her that she hadn’t drawn the conclusion of its presence two hours ago. It very faintly smelled like the pillow next to her was smoldering. Of course. XR had been laying on it for hours; his burned-marshmallow scent had transferred right over to it.

           Rachel’s left hand grabbed at the pillow, drawing it up to her face. Up close, it definitely smelled like it had a lit match dropped onto it at some point, though the fabric was undamaged, yet again suggesting, bafflingly, that the scent was not the sign of some malfunction. Now Rachel had two choices. She could go full tsuntsun and chuck that pillow to the far end of the room, to be forgotten about until laundry day. Or she could fall asleep hugging it like some kind of perverted stalker. (A taste of his own medicine, hm?) Just putting it back in place was not an option.

           Throw it, she told herself. Increase the denial.

           What won was the argument was that it wasn’t that creepy, really, not when she didn’t have actual predatory intentions – just to have a sensory input that reminded her of someone she liked being around.

           Sleep took her over as she cradled that pillow close, breathing in what could have been the odor of the aftermath of an arson scene.

 ***

           Rachel was awoken by the sound of the doorbell. After the first ring, she waited a moment to see if another barrage of ringing would follow.

           Instead, when she didn’t answer, it was a sharp knocking that came at the door. A slight disappointment.

           She crept out of bed, calling out tentatively, once more, “WHO IS IT?”. What time was it, anyway? A glance at the clock told her it was ten at night.

           “DELIVERY FOR RACHEL SPARKS!” That actually was the voice of the regular deliveryman. All hope was doused. Then again, receiving a package was a pretty rare event. Rachel couldn’t imagine what the delivery was. As covert as she’d tried to make her antidepressant acquisition, she hadn’t scheduled anything for this time.

           Prying open the door, she saw the deliveryman smiling his biggest at her; did this guy seriously mean it every time he smiled like that, or was it a façade to hide an ennui with his job? She hoped it was the former. “What’s up?” she asked.

           “Rachel!” the deliveryman greeted. “Special delivery just for you! It was just sent out this evening!” He extended a clipboard.

           “I, uh…” Rachel gave him a sheepish look. “Can’t really use my right hand right now. Can we just do the retinal scan and call it good?”

           “Sure thing!” He acquiesced; a mild laser made Rachel’s eye twitch but confirmed her identity enough for the package to be handed over. It was stuffed into a bubble-wrap-lined manila envelope, barely small enough to be contained by its manila skin. Rachel had a strong guess that it was a tape based on that. Goodness knew she’d tried to mail tapes that way before. Who hadn’t?

           She told the deliveryman thank you, and he gave her a jovial “Haaaave a nice day!” before gallivanting off into the night, hopefully not to stay out too late making other deliveries.

           Rachel shut and locked the door, bringing the envelope back to the bed to open it up as best she could with one hand (which turned out to be a bit of an ordeal; her teeth got involved). As she’d thought, it was a tape: unlabeled. That could mean anything from an anonymous death threat to a video will informing her she’d inherited two million unibucks from a great-uncle she’d never heard of.

           She inserted it into the player, tuning the television to the proper reception signal and clicking the tape into play.

           It began with a countdown of a “3…2…” on a spinning gray circle that had obviously been added in post-production. The next thing Rachel knew, she was looking at a view of Buzz Lightyear, Mira Nova, and Booster Munchapper on a desert plain, all three of them smiling in her direction.

           “AAAAAAND WE ARE ROLLING!” XR’s voice declared; Rachel realized he was the one filming, probably right through his eyes. “Spotlight’s on you, people! Let’s hear it with FEELING!”

           “Hi, Rachel!” Mira began, waving.

           “How’re ya doing?” Booster asked before realizing, “Wait…you can’t answer. Sorry.”

           “It’s just not the same without you, ranger,” Buzz added. “But thanks to XR here, today, you get to sit back, relax, and keep healing while we do the dirty work.”

           “And you get a front-row seat to all the action!” Booster agreed. “And boy, is this a big one today.”

           “Way, WAY bigger than Tanker Alley,” Mira added. “Sorry you have to miss it, but, then again, this also means you don’t have to have your life threatened today, so…silver lining?”

           “It’s life-threatening indeed,” Buzz stated somberly. “We’re on a mission to stop Zurg from engineering a duplicate of the Motzrothian senator and using his guise to order lax labor laws – “

           “Come on!” XR urged. “Can’t you make this all a little more DRAMATIC? The EVIL EMPEROR ZURG has accessed superior cyborg cloning technology that, in the wrong hands, could bring the entire galaxy to ruination, AND IT HAPPENS TO BE IN THE WRONG HANDS! Only the bravest team in all of Star Command has any hope whatsoever of stopping him! And the key to Zurg’s destruction lies with one man in particular: the bravest, most intelligent, and most ATTRACTIVE robot to ever cross his path – “

           “Okay, we’re stopping there,” Mira interrupted.

           That was when a hover platform bearing Zurg floated down from the sky behind the team, and the evil emperor himself pointed accusingly: “LIGHTYEAR! So you and your team of has-beens decided to show up after all! It’s about time! I was expecting you thirty minutes ago! Does punctuality mean NOTHING to you hero types? Oh, well, no matter. There’s still PLENTY of time for you to hear about how I’ve factored your demise into my newest fiendish plan!”

           “Yeah, why don’t you tell us what you’re planning to do?” Mira asked innocently.

           “Gladly,” Zurg told her. “For, you see, I want you to have a chance to DREAD the excruciating pain I have in store for you.”

           In a low whisper that Rachel knew only she could hear, XR narrated, “A classic gambit. Our heroes trick the overly egotistical villain into bragging about exactly what he plans to do to them…” He’d begun rolling, moving gingerly away from Zurg. “…giving their secret weapon, i.e. me, a chance to find the evil device he’s planted on this planet, disable it before he notices, and then – “

           “OH, NO, YOU ABSOLUTELY DON’T!” Zurg suddenly bellowed mid-monologue. The camera whirled; Zurg was pointing directly at XR. “You think you can get your ROBOT to slip away while I’m instilling dread!” Suddenly he’d zoomed right up before XR, filling the screen. “Just for that, I’m upgrading your torture to the DELUXE package. Intense pain, simultaneous psychological torment, and I get a smoothie. You’ll WISH you were going through your friends’ basic torture package.”

           “Speaking of my friends,” XR said cockily, leaving it at that.

           “Wait – “ Zurg spun a 180, and XR peeked around him to capture on film that while Zurg was distracted threatening XR, the other three had scattered. “WHHHHHAT?”

           “Man, is this guy a moron,” XR commented.

           “WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME?” Zurg screamed, turning back to XR.

           “To put it in context,” XR explained, “I’m filming this for a friend, hence the narration.”

           “Wait a minute,” Zurg realized. “Is it the blonde ranger? The one whose name I can never remember? Because I NOTICED she wasn’t here today, but I wasn’t about to SAY anything. I was rather hoping she’d perished when I wasn’t looking, though. But maybe it’s better this way. I mean, now I do get the pleasure of killing her myself. Eventually. Whenever she shows – NO. ENOUGH STALLING!”

           He knocked XR into the sand before taking off to pursue the others.

           Rachel watched the entire mission play out, from Zurg thinking he had the upper hand to his eventual foiling and his rocketing away, crying, “CURSE YOU, BUZZ LIGHTYEEEEAAAR!”. Rachel did in fact wish she were there to live out the magic herself, but really, this was the next best thing.

           “All right, team,” Buzz directed, looking to the wreckage of Zurg’s cyborg cloning device (which admittedly did make Rachel curious as to how exactly it worked). “Time to get this evidence wrapped up and confiscated before some other miscreant comes along and – “

           “Oh, you think you’re gonna pack this all up and ship it off, do ya?” a deep voice broke in. XR’s camera swiveled immediately to observe a familiar figure holding up the device’s energy core in one hand and hovering the other over his chest plate. “I got a better idea. I sell this back to Zurg for the big bucks, and whichever ones of ya I don’t finish off here, he gets to later.”

           “TORQUE!” Buzz, Mira, and Booster chorused.

           “Now, how’s THAT for a plot twist?” XR cried triumphantly.

           Team Lightyear was soon engaged in a battle against the Torque Armada, which was at least seven strong – Rachel kept losing track of exactly how many duplicates were on the field. At one point, one of the Torques was advancing upon XR, declaring, “Now, you, baby, you’re some high-tech stuff. I could use your components.”

           “Hold on,” XR replied, which halted Torque in his tracks. “Could you say that again, but a little louder, with more clarity? And try to sound a little more threatening. You’re the villain here, after all.”

           “Huh?” Torque regarded XR with confusion. “Hey, wait…you filmin’ this?”

           “You may have noticed we’re one short today,” XR informed him. “I’m sending this back to her so she can be here without being here, if you catch my drift.”

           “Oh, this is for Blondie, ain’t it?” Torque realized. “We-he-hell…” He drew himself upright, puffed out his chest, and stood at an angle. “Be sure to get my good side.”

           “Any well-wishes for our out-of-commission teammate?” XR asked.

           “Yeah, I got one,” Torque affirmed. “Hey you, Blondie, you keep on keepin’ on, ya hear? Even when the chips are down and it seems hopeless, ya gotta keep fightin’ the good fight. For instance, you’re probably gonna feel real down after I STRIP YOUR LITTLE ROBOT CAMERAMAN FOR PARTS.”

           That prompted XR to whirl about and head in the opposite direction as quickly as he could, crying out, “THAAAAAT’S ENOUGH OF TORQUE’S CLOSE-UP!”

           Rachel couldn’t help but giggle. After all, she knew he (and the entire team, for that matter) had come out of this okay, or the tape wouldn’t have gotten edited and sent back to her.

           After Torque was subdued, the camera suddenly cut to a view from atop a high plateau; down below, in the desert, four figures were battling. Rachel recognized them as Buzz, Mira, Booster, and someone she really should’ve expected at this point.

           “So, it turns out that our viewing audience was one hundred percent correct,” XR narrated. “Zurg, Torque, and NOS-4-A2 did in fact all strike on the same day. Now, since NOSy is a particularly tough enemy with a sordid history with Star Command, I thought the epic showdown was best filmed from more of a wide angle bordering on bird’s-eye. After all, I don’t want to get cl – YOU don’t want to miss a second of this action! As usual, of course, our heroes are getting the upper hand, and – where’d he go? No, seriously, where is he?”

           NOS-4-A2 had disappeared from the battlefield, and Rachel could see that Buzz, Mira, and Booster were all exchanging shrugs and searching for him in a panic.

           All of a sudden, NOS-4-A2’s face filled the camera, a sly grin plastered across his face. “Playing a little game of hide-and-seek, are we, little one? Hm?” he chuckled. “I do so enjoy the thrill of the chase.”

           The last thing Rachel heard before the visuals cut out was XR yelping “OKAYYOUFOUNDMEYOUWONNOWLEAVEMEALONE – “

           The immediate next scene was of NOS-4-A2, powered down and clamped into iron bands that bound his limbs and prevented him from spreading his wings. “I never doubted for a minute we’d get him,” XR proclaimed. “Of course, it was my idea to play the sitting duck and draw him in so the others could make their move. YOU’RE WELCOME!”

           “I thought it was us who saved you,” Booster said in legitimate confusion. “You were REALLY scared – “

           “WAS NOT,” XR argued.

           Mira chuckled. “I think we’ll leave Rachel to make that call. She probably knows EXACTLY what happened on that subject.”

           Rachel did know exactly what had happened. He was a fraidy-cat moron. He was her personal favorite fraidy-cat moron.

           One more shot of the team grouped up, smiling and waving. “Sorry again you had to miss that, Rachel!” Booster cried.

           “I hope you’re feeling better!” Mira added. “And I hope you had fun watching XR get chased around by all the bad guys!”

           “That is an INCREDIBLE oversimplification of what happened,” XR argued.

           “Lookin’ forward to when you can join us on the adventure again,” Buzz concluded. “Now you get some rest, Rachel.”

           “And so concludes another epic episode of The Adventures of Team Ligh – no, wait,” XR mused, “there has to be a better title for this. Star Command’s Ranger Lightyear? Buzz Lightyear and the Rangers. No, wait, BUZZ LIGHTYEAR OF ST – actually, scrap that: THE ADVENTURES OF XR, ROBOT RANGER.”

           The giggle that came out of Rachel’s throat was riding on a snort.

           “Aaaaand SCENE!” With that final declaration, the tape ended.

           Rachel made a childishly high squeal. He’d really thought to tape the mission for her so she wouldn’t miss out. She could hardly have been happier at that point.

           Way past midnight, again. Time to get back to sleep. Cuddling that burned-marshmallow-smell pillow even tighter; who was around to judge?

 ***

           The doorbell rang.

           Rachel had lost all sense of time. There was sleep, there was the state of waking, and there was the doorbell to facilitate the transition from one to the other.

           The doorbell again. And again. And again –

           Perhaps she was a little too eager to leap out of bed. Her shoulder twinged, reminding her that she had to take it slow. Without even asking who was there, she opened the door.

           XR sped right past her once again, parking in the midst of the living room and swiveling to face her. “How’s the patient?” he asked, his seemingly chipper smile betraying a hint of hidden frustration. “Feeling better? Resting up? Getting her strength back? On the mend? WHO KILLED OREGANO?”

           “So THAT’S what this is about,” Rachel laughed. “And you did SUCH a good job of not letting it show that cliffhanger was bothering you in the tape.”

           “There’s a time for business and a time to resolve cliffhangers,” XR explained. “So are we going to or not?”

           “I am SO looking forward to seeing your face when you see this revelation,” Rachel said with a grin.

           “Ten minutes for popcorn and I’m there,” XR told her. Rachel was at first flattered again that he was concerned with supplying her with food until she remembered that he continually, bafflingly forgot that he couldn’t eat food. It always was rather humorous to watch him try.

           They settled on the bed in their previous configuration. Rachel had discreetly put the pillow back where it had been, feeling almost sneaky in hiding how she’d cradled it in her good arm for the past two nights. XR had at least had the presence of mind to tote a second ice pack – or, perhaps, at this stage, it was a little more than “at least.” Rachel shoveled a fistful of the popcorn that XR was seconds away from remembering the hard way that he couldn’t eat into her own mouth, clicking the next episode of Bulletproof Hearts into play.

           When the mystery was solved (“AN ELEVATOR? Also, I was SURE Castella was behind this one!”) and the action had died down a bit, Rachel asked, “What was your excuse this time?”

           “Well, without you to manage the spreadsheets,” XR explained, “we have a huge backlog of spreadsheets that need to be organized. Which I took it upon myself to do. And that’s what you’re going to tell Nebula if he calls and asks where I am.”

           Why would he call here to ask where you are? Rachel wondered. It’s not like anyone outside the team would draw a connection between me and you. Then, suddenly stricken with dread: “XR, these are fake spreadsheets you made up to get a day off, right? They don’t actually exist, right? WE DON’T ACTUALLY HAVE A BACKLOG OF SPREADSHEETS I’M GONNA NEED TO DO WHEN I GET BACK ON DUTY, RIGHT?”

           XR was dead silent, staring ahead at the screen.

           “XR. DO…THESE…SPREADSHEETS…EXIST?”

           His head swiveled to face her, his eyes appearing half-lidded with emerald light (really, Rachel couldn’t be the only person in the world who noticed how many colors his eye-lights could be, could she?), and he said in the least reassuring tone possible, “SPOILERS.”

 ***

           For the next two weeks, some days, he was there, and it was a neverending stream of snark at the television. Bulletproof Hearts was finished –

           “Am I supposed to feel satisfied or disappointed about that finale? Because both of those are gunning for it.”

           “I dunno what the crew intended, but that’s EVERY fan’s reaction.”

           Despair Days knocked out –

           “So does Spice ever, you know, join the actual main plot?”

           “Not yet. But there ARE rumors of an official next season of BH in production. Nothing confirmed, of course, but – “

           “And you just HAD to get me to the point where that would actually affect me, didn’t you?”

           And after that, just whatever they could find that either was relatively interested in watching, or, more appropriately, interested in yelling and/or laughing at in between synchronized slurps of diet orange soda and 0W SAE J300.

           Some days, he wasn’t there, but at the end of the day, there was always, always a tape chronicling whatever expedition Rachel had missed that day, complete with requests of well-wishes from whoever XR crossed paths with. So far, he’d managed to accumulate:

·      A sullen “Don’t die” from Dr. Furbanna.

·      A tirade from Eon about how fragile primitive lifeforms were, and how he couldn’t imagine living in a body where stressing out a single shoulder could put you out for more than an hour.

·      A “Gargantia wishes its hero well!” from Ambassador Major.

·      A “GARGANTIA SPITS ON YOUR NAME!” from Monumentus.

·      A gruff “You better be staying in bed, ranger. Oh, and get well soon.” from Commander Nebula, with a chorus of chirps from the LGMs in the background.

·      An “Isn’t that the blonde one? Okay, yeah, feel better!” from Petra.

·      A “GOOD. I mean, oh, yes, of course, I have no reason to NOT want you pursuing me!” from Rentwhistle Swack.

·      An “XL is destroying everything, and you want me to say WHAT?” from Savy SL-4.

·      An “I’m trying to destroy everything, and you want me to say WHAT?” from XL.

·      An “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?” from Warp Darkmatter while Evan Aries discreetly made a heart shape with his hands in the background, aiming it at Rachel with a sheepish expression.

           The more the days progressed, Rachel thought, she really ought to lighten up on calling XR a dumbass. He’d more than made up for being the reason for her sprain in the first place. This while chastely cuddling her pillow that now smelled like it had been tossed on a barbecue grill.

 ***

           Finally, she regained the mobility in her shoulder, with only a light tenderness to remind her of the damage, and that would fade soon. Medical cleared her for duty, and she reunited with the rest of Team Lightyear in the mess hall.

           “Good to have you back, Rachel!” Buzz just about gave her a hearty clap on the right shoulder – then remembered and repositioned himself to deal the affectionate blow to her left instead. “It just isn’t the same without all five of us on the team. It’ll be good to have XR back, too.” He shot a glance toward XR. “Not that I don’t approve of you taking time off to spend with Rachel, since…you know…”

           “It WAS his fault she got hurt,” Mira said coldly.

           “Hey now!” XR protested. “We talked about this!”

           “I was going to say because he’s a good friend,” Buzz finished. “And that’s what good friends do. Not that we’re not ALL good friends, but we couldn’t have taken the entire team off the field, and XR was the one who volunteered – “

           “I getcha,” Rachel said with a nod. “Don’t worry. I’m not gonna hold up your analyst anymore. Provided he doesn’t sprain anything else on me.”

           “I make no promises,” XR replied, “but I will try my DARNEDEST. Yes, I said DARNEDEST, so you know I’m serious.”

           “How’d chilling out without us go, by the way?” Mira asked, and Rachel could see the question she was really asking written on her face.

           “Yeah!” Booster echoed, obviously picking up the same thread. “Did anything SPECIAL happen while you two were hanging out?”

           As Rachel, positioned behind XR, frantically made “please no” gestures at the gossipy pair, slicing her hands through the air, XR replied, “As a matter of fact, yes.”

           Even Rachel froze, wondering what he was referring to and hoping against hope -            “Rachel ruined my life by getting me addicted to her stupid show and now I can’t actually not care about what’s going to happen next season.”

           Rachel’s heart restarted beating.

           XR swiveled to look up to her; “You’re SURE we don’t have an airdate on that, by the way?”

           “Not until they finish Despair Days,” Rachel asserted.

           “Yes,” XR snarked, “because we need to focus on this side plot that has NOTHING to do with the remnants of Nort’s plan, has NO connection to Ashe and Braigel picking up the pieces with the relics, and won’t even ADDRESS the fact that Spice and Red are related and whether that means Spice has the golden eyes. I HATE that you made me actually know what I’m talking about.”

           “BUT…IF SPICE AND VERTHANDI BECOME CANON …”

           “Then a thousand fanfictions will be written,” XR said with a smirk, “and it will be that much easier to find your new pen name.”

           God forbid. That would lead him to GEAvillain and a whole can of worms that needed to stay shut. “You’ll never find me,” she said cheekily, covering up the panic associated with the hypothetical that he might, in fact, figure out the identity of JCMotzroth. Changing the subject by force, she looked Buzz in the eye. “Sooooo. How are things with Bonnie?”

           “We, uh…” Buzz rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “We kinda…sorta…didn’t work out.”

           “Oh,” Rachel replied. She’d seen that one coming a mile off, but that didn’t lessen the pain for him, and she knew it. “I’m sorry.”

           “No, no,” Buzz explained, “I was the one who called it off. There was just no spark there. Pun not intended. Anyway, you were right. I shouldn’t have said yes. Only reason I did was because I didn’t wanna let her down, but it just…well, it didn’t feel right after our history! I should’ve just listened to you – “

           Rachel’s stomach began to stir. Being right wasn’t the victory she’d hoped it would be. First of all, it still couldn’t have been easy on Buzz to figure out the relationship was going nowhere. Second, she’d almost put stock in him and Bonnie changing her mind. If Bonnie could turn Buzz’s interest her way, certainly that meant there wasn’t any harm in Rachel putting the subject on the table regarding a certain someone else.

           A certain someone else who chose that moment to say “And WHEN are you going to learn that Rachel and I are always, always, ALWAYS right?”

           That broke the spell. “HEY!” Rachel yelled down at XR. “You weren’t with me on that one at ALL!”

           “Yes, I was,” XR argued. “I definitely didn’t want those two to date. I believe I made that PERFECTLY clear.”

           “Yeah, because you wanted Bonnie for YOURSELF,” Rachel argued. “Not because you thought she was making Buzz uncomfortable!”

           “I knew she was making him uncomfortable, which is why I so GRACIOUSLY stepped in to divert her attention – “

           “Bull SHIT.”

           “It’s all back to normal around here, all right,” Mira said teasingly.

           Heading out of the mess hall, XR told Rachel, “You know, now that you’ve made a diehard Bulletproof Hearts addict out of me, I have to pay you back.”

           “What do YOU have that you could POSSIBLY get me into?” Rachel asked.

           “I bet I could make a gambler out of you,” XR teased, knowing full well that had a snowball’s chance in the sun’s core of happening.

           “Yeah, no,” Rachel told him. “Keep dreaming.”

           “Wanna bet? Ten unibucks says you get into it.”

           “I’ll take tha – OHHHH. I SEE WHAT YOU ARE TRYING TO DO. AND IT IS NOT GOING TO WORK. NO BET.”

           They glared at each other, as was customary, before their expressions softened, allowing each other a smile.

           Far be it from Rachel to sacrifice a good friendship over feelings she had no business even having. All the same, it felt sour within to know that she could never tell him. She wasn’t about to become his Bonnie Lepton. And she wasn’t about to be his mistake.

[neverheardnothing]

what the hell will winston (and the rest of the tmc gang) even DO while working at axe cap? because axe cap clearly does NOT want quants since axe scrapped the whole team as soon as he came back.

im kinda assuming that it’s just the main 5 of them going to work at the axe cap offices for now. how does axe respond to this? the deal he made was for taylor to come work at axe cap again for a while. he really only wants taylor there. he couldnt give less of a shit about the others (well, he wants revenge on mafee). so what does he do with sara, lauren, and winston?

does winston get absorbed into their IT department? like that poor dude who got yelled at a lot when the power went out at axe cap? that’s not really his specialty though, so i cant imagine him actually going there. or does no one really notice that he’s there and so he just sits around all day and pretends he’s working, but really he’s just dicking around on reddit or working on his own projects. he just tries to keep his head down and blend into all the faceless employees at axe cap before they realize that he’s not actually doing anything all day. what about the rest of the quant team at tmc? what are they doing? in fact, what are all of the rest of the employees at tmc doing? are they also coming along to work at axe cap and we just didn’t see them there initially, or are they all back at the tmc offices just hanging around and continuing to work there. can axe cap fit all these sudden new employees arriving? how many people work at tmc? i have so many questions. back to assuming only the 5 of them go to axe cap.

or maybe the fact that winston is a quant is like a Known Fact and so all the traders at axe cap are wary of him because hes the Guy Who’s Gonna Take Their Jobs. and on the outside his personality is very brash and there’s a lot of bravado there so i can see some of them (not like dollar bill or bonnie lmao) being scared of him initially. ben kim is probably scared of winston lmao. his freakout to wendy about how he should have listened to his mom and learned how to code is coming back now that there’s an actual person here working at axe cap who is the Future of what his job will be. dollar bill and bonnie probably threaten to break his nose in or something while also very lowkey being scared.

back to everyones jobs...

lauren’s job seems pretty relevant. investor relations is important for hedge funds probably and i assume they can always use more people in that department, especially since i dont think we’ve seen anyone there before from axe cap. and if lauren is as good at it as she seems to be, then they would probably really like to use her. though would they trust her to interact with investors since she is the Enemy tm? i dont think they would want someone that hates them to be the person interacting with their investors, especially since the last time that happened, taylor walked away with billions in money from investors that were supposed to be investing in axe cap. theyre not gonna let that happen again anytime soon. maybe axe thinks the pressure of what he “has” on taylor will be enough to keep lauren in line, but still. axe has no idea what lauren could be saying to his investors. 

sara, however, what the hell is sara doing? her job is chief operating officer. which is the same title as wags, but at axe cap taylor will have no real power like they did before, so sara definitely wont either. i honestly have no IDEA what sara could be doing at axe cap tbh. thats her entire section. ive got nothing. please let me know if you think of something.

mafee has a job! he goes back to what he was doing before, but now he’s like the least popular guy in the room. except to ben kim. he’s fucking over the moon that mafee is back as we saw at the end of s4. number of traders at axe cap with even the slightest trace of morals: 2 again. i assume he and ben hang out a decent amount at work now, especially since i dont think anyone else would want to be around mafee because of the whole traitor thing. (ps how the fuck is the interaction between mafee and wendy after that whole “youre a garbage person” thing?)

ben doesnt seem to be the kind to care about his “social standing” within the company falling because he’s hanging out with mafee. i mean he gives a friendly hi to the two least popular people in the room at the moment of Highest Tension. he does NOT give a fuck. i assume winston probably also hangs out a decent amount around mafee because that’s the only other tmc person who is In The Office on the ground floor (since lauren’s job is kinda.. talking to people Outside of the office and taylor is off upstairs making those Brilliant Taylor Ideas with their big brain and being forced to hang with axe. maybe sara is also around there i guess, but she doesnt seem to be the kind to just.. hang about). but anyways this is a prime opportunity for winston and ben kim to interact, im just saying @ brian koppelman and david levien. ben is probably a lil bit scared of winston in the beginning since u know. thats his job taker right there, but he warms up to winston eventually. this isnt a benston post, ill move on now. 

(just kidding. im not done. i know the popular benston thing is that theyve secretly been dating all this time but imagine them meeting for the first time at axe cap in s5. ben and mafee are eating lunch together (acai bowls prob lmao) or something and winston just drops in, kicks his feet up on the table (mafee rolls his eyes) and casually says hi. ben on the inside is all like Ah Shit That’s The Quant Dude because he’s totally been avoiding winston up till now, but the dude is sitting across the table from him he can’t just not acknowledge him. or possibly ben has the opposite reaction. he’s grown a bit of a backbone since the last time quants were brought up. makes a show of not being scared of winston but also not being an ass to him, which makes winston respect him since everyone else here has been pretty hostile to him so far. i think winston probably has a good impression of ben because he was nice to taylor and mafee at the end of s4 and the fact that he and mafee are hanging around, so he must not be That Bad. and winston doesn’t seem to be very into the axe vs taylor rivalry (re the whole comp rant) so he probably won’t hate someone just because they work for axe cap. anyways this is the beginning of their long and healthy relationship. benston endgame yall.)

does wags remember winston? he must. that was quite an Impression he made during his interview. what are his interactions with wags like, if any? is winston all snarky like “ha, you passed on hiring me but im here anyways, fuck you” or is he wary around wags because he’s still thinking about how he got Destroyed in that interview. i dont think the walk of shame out of the building must have been something he forgot quickly. i think wags would be quick to call out winston if he weren’t doing anything while at axe cap. the interaction would probably go something like this: “ur not doing any goddamn work.” “yeah i know, u guys dont want quants, what am i gonna do?” “well, figure something out” (implied or else there). winston quickly figures something out. probably automates some stuff for them or something.

also, do people in general remember him as the guy who was REAL happy after the boxing match? i mean he kinda made a big scene. he was cheering and yelling and screaming “i won!! i motherfucking won!!” after everyone else was sitting around dejectedly because their team lost and they lost money. you have to remember that Weird Guy having a blast after everyone in the room is upset. do they seem him walk in at axe cap and go “ah, that fuckin weirdo.”

god, examining any aspect of billions for more than 3 seconds makes you realize how much of a disaster everything is. id definitely watch a show that’s just the office dynamics at axe cap now that the tmc gang is there. lord knows itd be more interesting than what’s been happening in the show up until now.

[usagingy]

Send me numbers..

Wait, these are actually hella cute questions.”

Source: bambwie

— 1. Who was the last person you held hands with? A friend from uni. There’s nothing romantic between us, was just for fun.

2. Are you outgoing or shy? Shy. As. Frick.

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing? My niece. She’s precious!

4. Are you easy to get along with? I honestly don’t know. I guess so?

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you? Pretty sure they would, yeah.

6. What kind of people are you attracted to? Usually people who are really easy to talk to and who are very kind and sweethearted (is that a word?)

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now? HaHaHaHahaHAAHhahaAHAhaha!!... No

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind? A good friend from high school. I just have platonic feelings for her, but I still miss her.

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable? Depends on how detailed the conversation is. If it’s not super detailed, then no, it doesn’t make me uncomfortable.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? Probably the friend from high school I mentioned in #8.

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say? “I was just confused” (boring, I know)

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now? 

Nine Point Eight - Mili

Candy Store - Heathers: The Musical

Here Comes A Thought - Steven Universe

Family Party - Kyary Pamyu Pamyu

Holding Out For A Hero - Bonnie Tyler

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair? If they’re really gentle with it, then yes. But when people get rough with it then I hate it.

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles? I guess so, I’m not sure tbh.

15. What good thing happened this summer? This “summer” only just started, so I can’t really say much, but I hung out with my brother and his friends.

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? I can’t answer this because I’ve never kissed anyone.

17. Do you think there is life on other planets? I don’t see why it couldn’t be possible. There are a lot of planets out there, so it would make sense if at least one sustained life on it.

18. Do you still talk to your first crush? Yeah, it’s cool, yo.

19. Do you like bubble baths? Ooh, I haven’t had one in so long, I can’t remember if I do.

20. Do you like your neighbors? I don’t even know my neighbors lmao

21. What are you bad habits? I procrastinate, I take too long to get ready, I am sometimes too open, I pry a bit too much, etc, etc.

22. Where would you like to travel? Germany, I guess, they have really good chocolate.

23. Do you have trust issues? Yep, trust issues with myself.

24. Favorite part of your daily routine? Going to bed.

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with? Excluding more inappropriate areas, my upper body, specifically the front part.

26. What do you do when you wake up? Sit there for a while, ponder life, check my phone if it’s not dead, then get up and do the same thing while standing up.

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker? I don’t really wish my skin was different, but if I had to choose one I’d say darker cuz I’m pale af.

28. Who are you most comfortable around? Hmmm, I guess I’d have to say I’m most comfortable around that one friend I mentioned in #8 again.

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up? Considering I don’t have any ex’s, no, they have not.

30. Do you ever want to get married? Yepppppppp

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail? Currently it is possible; however, I’m getting my hair cut soon, so it probably won’t be long enough in a little while.

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with? None of them. I’m ace.

33. Spell your name with your chin. I’m not even gonna try this right now.

34. Do you play sports? What sports? Nope, what’re sports?

35. Would you rather live without TV or music? Without TV; music is too precious.

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them? Several times, yo. I don’t know how to talk to people about that kind of thing.

37. What do you say during awkward silences? Usually nothing. Jk, I will often ask how someone else is doing, but it goes back to awkward silence again really quickly.

38. Describe your dream girl/guy? I’m not sure I really have a super ideal fantasy for a dream guy/girl, but I guess I’ll go for it. Generally I’m attracted to guys who are really soft and kind, usually significantly taller than me, usually with little to no facial hair, and most frequently they have dark hair and dark eyes. Generally girls that I find attractive are around my height, not usually much shorter than me. Usually they have dark hair and dark eyes, are very sweet, but also can be very assertive and driven. For anyone, I’d like to have similar interests, of course, because that makes it easier to have conversations. Also, the main reason I’m attracted to people of certain heights is just because of how it feels to hug people of those heights. (Sorry, this was a long one)

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in? GAMESTOP. Just game stores in general, and also the Pokémon stores in Japan.

40. What do you want to do after high school? I’ve already graduated high school and I still don’t know what I want to do after high school. I’m going to uni, originally for computer engineering, but now for theatre and electronic media performance.

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance? Not everyone, I guess. I think it’s more on a case by case basis, depending on the severity of the offense.

42. If you’re being extremely quiet what does it mean? Depends. Being quiet could mean that I’m uncomfortable (usually with strangers), comfortable (usually with close friends), thinking deeply about random shiznit, or just don’t know what to say.

43. Do you smile at strangers? Depends on how I’m feeling. I usually don’t look at other people because I don’t want them to think that I’m being creepy towards them.

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean? Outer space; the bottom of the ocean is terrifying.

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning? Usually the need for food, but sometimes the need for cleanliness.

46. What are you paranoid about? Way too many things to list here, so I’ll list a few. Abandonment, rejection, the feeling that there is a hole in my clothes, the feeling that people are watching and judging everything I do, the feeling that I’m going to unintentionally hurt people or things, etc.

47. Have you ever been high? Nope.

48. Have you ever been drunk? Nope.

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about? Not that I can think of.

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore? Brown with yellow letters.

51. Ever wished you were someone else? Too often, yes.

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself? I’d like to get rid of my envy and jealousy.

53. Favourite makeup brand? Don’t have one.

54. Favourite store? Pokémon store.

55. Favourite blog? Don’t have one.

56. Favourite colour? YELLOW

57. Favourite food? Curry rice with creamy crab croquettes.

58. Last thing you ate? Beef curry rice.

59. First thing you ate this morning? Haven’t eaten yet, but it’ll probably be Life cereal.

60. Ever won a competition? For what? Won a couple Pokémon tournaments. One made me a gym leader for a League, another got me a New 3DS XL.

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what? Nope.

62. Been arrested? For what? Nope.

63. Ever been in love? Yepppp

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss? And this is where I’d put the story of my first kiss. IF I HAD ONE.

65. Are you hungry right now? Yessssss

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends? Considering I don’t really have many tumblr friends (I think?) I like my real friends more.

67. Facebook or Twitter? Facebook

68. Twitter or Tumblr? Tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now? Nope

70. Names of your bestfriends? Jay, Natz, Xixi, Frances, Aleigha, Kirbs, Dani, Hunter, Marissa, (the list goes on and on, I can’t decide on just a few best friends)

71. Craving something? What? Takoyaki!

72. What colour are your towels? Brown

72. How many pillows do you sleep with? Two (2)

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals? I used to, but since ya mentioned it, I might start doing it again.

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have? At least 20, question mark???

75. Favourite animal? Tie between monkeys, foxes, and rabbits.

76. What colour is your underwear? Idk, it changes everyday.

77. Chocolate or Vanilla? Depends on the quality. Usually vanilla since too much chocolate gives me a stomach ache.

78. Favourite ice cream flavour? Strawberry banana, but since it’s really uncommon I usually settle for mint chocolate chip.

79. What colour shirt are you wearing? Yellow

80. What colour pants? Blue

81. Favourite tv show? Steven Universe

82. Favourite movie? Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2? I haven’t seen either, I’m trash

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street? Same as above

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls? Same as above above

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo? Dory

87. First person you talked to today? Friend staying at my house

88. Last person you talked to today? Friend staying at my house

89. Name a person you hate? I don’t think I hate anyone, that’s a really strong word.

90. Name a person you love? Kaia (my niece)

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now? Nope

92. In a fight with someone? Not right now, I think? If I am, I’ve forgotten.

93. How many sweatpants do you have? Quite a lot, but I don’t wear them.

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have? Too many, probs over 15, but I only regularly wear two of them.

95. Last movie you watched? Psycho-Pass: The Movie

96. Favourite actress? Emma Watson

97. Favourite actor? Does John Mulaney count?

98. Do you tan a lot? I straight up burn, so nope

99. Have any pets? Nope

100. How are you feeling? Neutral in general

101. Do you type fast? Depending on the situation.

102. Do you regret anything from your past? Toooooo muchhh

103. Can you spell well? Sometimes

104. Do you miss anyone from your past? Lotsa old friends.

105. Ever been to a bonfire party? Yeah, not really a fan of them.

106. Ever broken someone’s heart? I think maybe once or twice? I don’t know about many people liking me.

107. Have you ever been on a horse? Yeah, but it was when I was super young so I don’t remember what it was like.

108. What should you be doing? Probably applying for scholarships.

109. Is something irritating you right now? Only my intrusive thoughts, but that’s all the time.

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt? Pretty much every time I’ve liked someone, yeah.

111. Do you have trust issues? I think this was answered already, but yes.

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of? The last person I cried full out in front of was my mom, but I have had a couple tears run down my face when in the dorms at uni.

113. What was your childhood nickname? Gingerbread, Gingersnaps

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state? Yep yep

115. Do you play the Wii? Yesssssss

116. Are you listening to music right now? No, but I should be.

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup? Hell yeah

118. Do you like Chinese food? Hell yeah!

119. Favourite book? Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

120. Are you afraid of the dark? Yes, but only if I’m unfamiliar with the area.

121. Are you mean? I don’t know? Sometimes

122. Is cheating ever okay? Nope. Never. Absolutely not. If you cheat, I have big problems with you.

123. Can you keep white shoes clean? I probably couldn’t lol

124. Do you believe in love at first sight? Not really? But it depends. I’d say it’s possible upon the first meeting, but not by just seeing the person. I think truly falling in love with someone purely based on their appearance is rather shallow and difficult to do.

125. Do you believe in true love? Kinda? I don’t really believe that there’s one specific person that you’re destined to be with, but I do believe that people can develop a strong enough connection with each other that it could be considered true love.

126. Are you currently bored? Somewhat, but it’s rare for me to not be somewhat bored.

127. What makes you happy? Long hugs with people I care about, snuggles, some video games and anime, having deep conversations with friends.

128. Would you change your name? I don’t know what I’d change it to, so no.

129. What your zodiac sign? Libra

130. Do you like subway? Yeah

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? If I like them back, then try to make a relationship work out I guess. If not, I try my best to let them down gently and comfort them if possible.

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? I think this was answered before as well, but friend mentioned in #8.

133. Favourite lyrics right now? The entirety of Here Comes A Thought.

134. Can you count to one million? Yeah? I’m not sure what this question is supposed to mean.

135. Dumbest lie you ever told? “Yeah, I’ve done my homework *has homework on computer screen*”

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed? Closed. Open feels too insecure.

137. How tall are you? 5′ 7″

138. Curly or Straight hair? Straight

139. Brunette or Blonde? Brunette(?) I don’t know what this is asking, but I find dark hair attractive.

140. Summer or Winter? Winterrrrrr. No bugs and no sunburn.

141. Night or Day? Night, it makes it feel like emotions are heightened.

142. Favourite month? Never thought about this, but I guess February.

143. Are you a vegetarian? Nah, I like chicken too much.

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate? Milk chocolate. Dark chocolate is too rich and makes my stomach hurt. White chocolate has a flavor that I think does best at complimenting other things, like fruit. Individually I like milk best because it’s flavorful, but not too rich.

145. Tea or Coffee? Coffee, but only if it has a lot of sweetness mixed with the bitterness.

146. Was today a good day? Today has barely started, but it seems like it’ll be a decent day.

147. Mars or Snickers? Snickers

148. What’s your favourite quote? "My vibe is like, hey you could probably pour soup in my lap and I'll apologize to you." -- John Mulaney

149. Do you believe in ghosts? No? Idk, I don’t think about that stuff.

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page? “The recommended dietary intake of potassium ranges from 500 mg to 700 mg per day for infants between 6 and 12 months.”

[adobe-outdesign]

BATIM Chapter 3 Liveblog

I’ll be watching Ertyez’s playthrough for this!

Keep in mind these are loose and unorganized thoughts, and some things I say won’t make sense.

I will check out the updated chapter 1 and 2 afterward. Want to get spoilers out of the way first.

Under the cut for length.

hey alice

WOAH ALICE

BORIS HAS A FLOPPY NOSE

rise an fall = steam description mentions something coming to surface, so you’re probably moving between upper/lower levels of buildings

BENDY FELIX CLOCK

hey, the Fan made it in despite it not even being a FNAF game

aww, there’s a nice hammock for naps. be great if a demon wasn’t trying to kill you

Bendy clock says it’s about 7:35

ooh, so that’s where Boris has been living

cartoons have underwear, good to know

henry is vampire confirmed

is there... ink in that toilet? that’s just unsanitary

ooh, those are some nice sexy ink textures

Boris is... adorable

and he has tea!

one of those cards has Bendy’s face on it

boris and henry are evenly matched

has henry like... been down here a while hiding out or

uh hey what the fuck

does joey want to like amalgamate these guys or something?? there’s pieces from all three of them in the college

aww, he has a little TV. does it get reception?

wait did Boris kidnap you

oh yeah, alice confirmed for speaking earlier

boris seems to be mute? alice was probs made from susie, her VA, so that probably means boris wasn’t

awwwwwwwww

cartoons confirmed to need to eat? unless they just do that for pleasure/fun

I wouldn’t sleep on a pillow with Bendy’s face on it

why the fuck is there a stove in here anyway?

warm soup’s gotta be nice. cold soup is just gross

this is so wholesome

you think Boris laps up soup like a dog

why... why can’t we go back exactly

wait are those bacon soup dispensers because holy shit

who the fuck would want cold bacon soup why is there an option for that

oh, so the flashlight has the “Gent“ on it. company name maybe?

don’t point the flashlight down the hallway of N. Bonnie will jumpscare you

denial is the best way to die down here henry

were those the things from the trailer making those noises?

boris... boris that’s the wall buddy

Boris I’m sorry for doubting you. you’re a Good Boy

giant sammy-mask style bendy head... I Don’t Like It

HOLY DICK THAT IS A BIG ROOM

ooh, this must be where they make the plushies!

joey stop expanding the damn studio the thing’s gonna collapse at this rate

singing. Alice must hang out here. maybe Susie donated the bendy plushie?

joey get your passive-aggressive ass posters outta here like half your employees are literally in hell

“I better get overtime for this“ if you can’t joke about the little things

only alice, boris, and bendy plushies. they must’ve been the only main characters, or at least the most popular ones

“why is there always something blocking the door“ he’s becoming too self aware

the new item glimmer is very nice, much more noticeable than the old one

ooh, they had a whole assembly line down here for mass production

by the way, the visuals are fucking gorgeous so far

ooh, new person! and he’s Irish!

that’s like the 4th person in this studio with some type of accent

how do you melt... a plushie...

oh no, alice angel didn’t become as popular as bendy. poor susie

Joey is A) very possessive of bendy and B) quick to temper (the steam description points out that Bendy is pissed). suspicious

joey has like a 1% employee approval rating, and that was pre satan

the ink is thick enough to sculpt apparently. Henry’s pretty darn good at it too (and he actually makes an on-model Bendy, joey)

is it just me or are the camera movements much more interesting?

I like how henry’s solution to open the door is to... start the conveyor belt again. whatever works I guess

is boris still in the vent thing

aww, alice has striped sockings. that’s adorable

no wait I change my mind this is not adorable

such a tiny little voice!

why is that poster upside down

this is Bad

that door has a start with a name on it. was alice already alive and given a room before the studio shut down?

NOPE BYE ALICE HAVE A NICE EXISTENCE

she has five goddamn fingers again

“I see you there“ mmm nope you don’t

oh cool she didn’t murder us up-front. take what you can get

too bad it was hinted out so heavily before the chapter came out that she was gonna turn, but oh well

switching over to this let’s play

oh hey, the candles are repurposed bacon soup cans, that’s a nice touch

are the plushies made of ink? the ink forms into the plushies, and that would explain the “melt them down“ line

her horns are bigger like Bendy’s as well, because, you know, demon

ooh, this is the path of the demon/angel achievement

mm, dreams come true, first wall message this chapter

dressing rooms for each character maybe?

oh no no no please don’t cry susie I love you

oh, so maybe susie isn’t alice and pendle is instead? unless joey still used her, her voice is so distorted I can’t tell

either alice turned to keep the part or she helped turn pendle to get her outta the picture

doesn’t sound like alice has the southern accent..

I thought it didn’t sound like her on the recording playing, that would explain why

there’s gotta be a way to fix this... the creator lied to us... dreams come true on her wall written by sammy... oh no

bendy you ass

something’s gonna murder us as soon as we go down that hall isn’t it

wait, did boris move the cutout or did he just happen to be there when it moved? I mean he was dead when the one moved in chapter 1

hooray, violence!

oh my god, the punch cards are save points. I love it

ooh, new characters! maybe the butcher gang were the ones chasing each other down the halls?

FUCK

oh thank god it’s dead

why the fuck was it behind a poster exactly

ha, I knew there was gonna be a lift

HOW MANY FUCKING FLOORS DOES THIS HELLHOLE HAVE

over here now

come to think it, the butcher boy died when you hit it, but Boris still left a corpse. maybe there’s a difference between making things out of pure ink and human corpses?

ooh new person

I feel like these new people might be the butcher gang folks? there’s at least two so far

take an elevator down to hell for your lunch break, it’s fun

shit how many goddamn boris are there?? this isn’t the one from upstairs, it’s on a completely different level

OH OH FUCK OH FUCK OH

oh, so there were like multiple attempts at making the cartoons, but the ones that didn’t work were torn apart, maybe used for other things

oh my god, Joey and Susie were a thing. because alice and bendy were a thing

YOU SHOULD NOT LIKE HIM CALLING YOU ALICE

okay yeah susie is totes alice, the near voice replacement is what joey lied about

oh shit she’s been murdering all these toons (or... rekilling them whatever)

her face is fucked. does being a demon fuck up the process?

ooh, so toons can kill other toons then? boris I need you to get near bendy pronto

the first vs the second time... ink machine mark 1 and 2 respectively? the mk2 did have a “stability improvement“

‘a few favors’ look I’m just not interested in dating sorry

okay so I was right, she’s more of an anti-hero than straight up villain

so even she’s scared of Bendy. can’t blame her, he kind of fucked her up bad

aaand over here

ooh drill

oh shit bigger searchers

maybe the searchers are looking for more toons to kill and take things from like Alice seems to be doing?

hey I mentioned in an ask earlier than an object-head norman would be pretty damn cool right?? ahahahahaaa

oh man the ink’s spreading through the walls? that is fucking awesome and terrifying

oh no boris

Bendy doesn’t seem to see you. no cutouts either hmmm

“I have you to pick up the pieces“ do I look like wally

which one of these characters had a tommy gun

oh okay, so most weapons are made of raw ink as well

uh hey quick question what the fuck

uuuh no I don’t need to meet norman. I think he’s got his problems right now

ah, I think she’s prying out the hearts of the others and absorbing them to fix herself

maybe that’s why sammy isn’t a searcher? it’s implied he’s the one who killed that boris upstairs

ooh, the cartoons playing on the wall is a nice touch

oh god, the lift’s gonna break like that one tape said isn’t it

‘I don’t think I’ll ever get to see it‘ sweetie...

oh, I think that susie creeping in there before she slipped back into Alice’s personality

called it, stealing things insides to fix herself

this is boris numero uno in terms of being correctly made apparently, so it might be that an emotional connection leads to the best results but isn’t inherently necessary for the process to work to some degree

GIVE ME BACK MY GOOD BOY

aaanaand going back for the path of the demon:

hey how come boris doesn’t get a room

oh look, animation supplies

JOEY YOU SON OF A BITCH I WASN’T EXPECTING YOUR VOICE

“you can even cheat death itself” aaah yep there’s his motivation for turning himself into bendy all right, especially if he was literally dying o polio at the time

“positively silly thought“ like sillyvision

okay, I think I’m missing a few small things like recordings but that’s at least most of the story. in conclusion:

holy fuck

[bunnywand]

finished watching colin baker’s doctor who’s yday, so here’s my thoughts on the ~6th doctor’s era~ 😳

i Rly didn’t like him at first sndsfdgh, they made him V unlikable in his first story, but he did slowly grow on me over time 😭 he’s still definitely the loudest, most pretentious and probs most ~undoctor-like~ doctor, but i can see where they were going w/ him softening up (a bit like the 1st and 12th doctors!!) it’s just he unfortunately didn’t get 2 play it out bcos he got fired.. 😔 but as i said he did grow on me a Lot and i would have liked 2 have seen more of him, but as it stands my ratings of the classic doctors from most to least fav atm (altho i don’t dislike any of them!!) is 5th, 2nd, 4th, 3rd, 6th, 1st 😮

the good thing abt his loud perfomance tho, is it made sure none of his stories were boring 😅 i’d read a lot abt them being some of the worst rated ones among the whole tv show, classic and modern, but it made me pleasantly surprised when i didn’t actually dislike any of them, and some of them are actually some of my favs of the whole show!! 😵

like, i think the worst thing a story can be is just Boring, which is where a lot of the 1st doctor’s, and even some of the 4th and 5th’s stories fall down, but i rly enjoyed all of 6′s, w/ some of my favs being vengeance on varos, the mark of the rani, the two doctors and all of the trial of a time lord but especially terror of the vervoids!! 🥰

as for companions tho.. peri never grew on me at All 😅 i think it was her Terrible american accent that rly pushed her over the edge 4 me, but apart from that she was another companion who.. didn’t rly do much?? she just always seemed 2 want 2 go back to the tardis and spent most of her time being the ~damsel in distress~ so i think unfortunately she might be the only companion so far (bcos i even liked adric a Little bit!!) that i’ve actually Disliked.. 😕 and then she Almost got a cool ending, apparently getting killed off in “mindwarp” but then it got revealed she was Another companion (like.. the 6th?? one now) to get married off, which i was Rly hoping we were done w/ by the 80s.. 😣 altho obvs that isn’t her fault, and her actress was rightfully annoyed abt it as well bcos she’d asked 2 be killed off, but still.. 😬

mel tho!! i’d read a lot abt ppl finding her annoying, and going into it i knew my mom Hates bonnie langford, so i was rly surprised i like her quite a lot!! maybe she’s just a relief after spending a season and a half w/ peri, but she’s v fun + happy, as well as clever and adventurous, and her intro w/ her being introduced in a future where she’s already travelling w/ the doctor is definitely one of the most interesting companion entrances in the whole show!! 🤯 and she had a good dynamic w/ the 6th doctor and does w/ the 7th as well from what i’ve seen so far so yeah, i like mel!! 😌

this post accidentally ended up being a bit longer than i meant it 2 be snfshjgff but yeah so that’s my thoughts on the 6th doctor!! 🥳 we started watching sylvester mccoy’s doctor who’s earlier and i’m Loving him from what i’ve seen so far (he was the one i was most looking forward 2 watching out of all of classic who too!! 😵) and i can’t wait 2 see where he goes, but omg this means i’ve nrly finished watching classic who now which is.. so weird bcos it’s all i’ve been watching since last november?? 😅😨 can’t believe it’s nrly over.. 😔

but anyways yeah!! long post, thanks 4 reading if u did!! 🥰✨

[hyuncakes]

hi i was not sure if i should send this to your main or this but since this blog is more wanna one related tag could your mutuals as points in "if kpop positions were accurate" this is the post = seokjinandtonic. tumblr. com/post/164651220236/if-kpop-positions-were-accurate i have been following both of you on your main and here and i like you to know i am a fan and your graphics inspire me

YOU ARE SOOOOO CUTE OMG THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR LIKING OUR GRAPHICS!! And saying that we inspire you ;___; that’s so so sweet of you I literally screamed. You deserve the worlddddddd!!! This seems fun so let’s get to it!! ^^ Lillian and I are gonna combine our answers lol so if you’re tagged and are like “lool this girl isn’t even following me though???” it’s prob the other person~ :^)

the hyung you thought was a maknae

tbh I thought Ying was my age but it turned out she was 95 line!!! @ Ying I also tagged you for something else below c:

the unofficial visual

@woojiniel and @perkwoojin are so so so pretty?? Idk but these were the first two I thought of!! They have such soft, sweet visuals and I think usually in groups the official visuals are the ones with the “stronger” visuals? But once you get into the group more you start to notice that one member who’s like so so cute that you can’t believe they’re not officially labelled as a visual. 

the “not my bias, but is my bias”

Ummm probably @hwangminyeo! She’s like the member of the group that you first notice because of her visuals, and then you’re like semi-interested in that member and half keeping an eye on that member while you settle on a bias. And then once you get into the group more you find out that not only is she a visual but she also has such a cute personality? Like she’s more shy and dorky than you originally anticipated and then you fall for her double charms. (But you still gotta stay loyal to your bias lol)

the workout-aholic who basically lives in the gym and boy does it show

I’m putting Abby @hwangminyeo under here to because idk if she goes to the gym often or not but body goals 😭😭😭😭

the walking, living, breathing meme

@seonnho This is the one image I have of Jennie tbh… just one big meme (a cute one at that)!!! She makes the best textposts on her SVT blog. I love her sense of humor it’s just so…. relatable LOL. Is it because she’s a Seungkwan stan that she’s like this? It’s proven that Boo stans are the memest. I feel like she hasn’t made that many meme-y posts on here (or maybe I missed them :(( in which case I suck) but once she does 👀 Anyway I’ve talked to you like twice but I still love you c’:

I looked at the positions list before looking at Bonnie’s answers and thought Jennie would be perfect for this one and guess what… Bonnie’s already listed her LMAOOO PERFECT - Lillian

the one everyone has called “daddy” at some point

aaah no one I can think of because Daniel isn’t mutuals with us…… LOOOOL OMFG JUST KIDDDDDING (Lillian be like 😷😣🙏) Why did I even answer this one it’s so weird kfldjglkfdjgklfd

😷😣🙏 - Lillian

the ship that’s a hundred percent real and they know it

Is this even a question… @hwangminyeo and @minhwangs are the power couple!!! You always see them professing their love to each other on your dash LOL Romeong and Daliette are feeling threatened.

the short one that everyone is highkey afraid of

@minhwangs Sarah is a cutie but everyone knows that if you mess with her friends she’ll let you have it. She won’t hesitate to lash out at you if you dare insult the things and people she holds dear. So while she isn’t scary, she’s someone you don’t want to mess with once her protective side kicks in! But honestly it’s really sweet how even though she doesn’t let harsh words directed toward her bother her, she stands up for people ;___; She’s selfless that way!

the one that takes every opportunity possible to be extra as hell aka the variety king

@emperorhwangs Rui without a doubt is one of the funniest people here on Tumblr!! I love her sense of humor and even when she says the most random things like “a stick of rat deodorant” I just die laughing. I was contemplating between putting her for “the walking, living breathing meme” but I settled with this one because I associate her with Ong a lot! And we all know he’s the variety king so~ The captions in her gifs are the funniest and most extra ever, even the way she talks is super extra and funny.

the motherly one that takes care of the rest of their members and occasionally reprimands

@2hyeons Ying is more of an older sister type than the mom but she still gives off that caring vibe. She seems like the kind of sibling who barely talks to you because she’s stuck in her room all day doing work but she’ll also be there for you when you need it the most. Lowkey the kind of older sister who will call your cheating significant other over the phone just to scream at them and rat them out for hurting her little sibling loool. She’s more of an older sibling because while she takes care of you, she makes you want to take care of her too and cook her meals and check up on her once in a while to make sure she’s still sane c’:

@luminous-point Reni gives off such motherly vibes without even trying to idk why?? Not only because she’s 95 line! But she’s like your sweet hardworking mother (working hard doing translations 👍👍👍) who you always think of fondly whenever she appears on your dash. She always expresses her true feelings and stands up for what’s right, which is really difficult to do and as a result super admirable. She always has a very mature standpoint about things and avoids unnecessary drama. I feel like the dynamic is that we’re all little ducklings and she’s the mom!! But mom has to take care of herself too!!!

@p-arkwoojin and @minsbugi I put Jem & Kenia in this category because they’d make sure all the members are equally loved!! They both have huge hearts and no matter how many members make up their group(s), they’d take care of each and every one! - Lillian

the 4D member that looks cute in a sexy comeback, and sexy in a cute one

@hahasunqwoons! I think the ‘4D’ title really suits Summer even though she may not seem like it at first. But once she opens up to you, you’ll know what I mean looooool. She’s not 4D in the really wild sense but more of a lowkey kind of 4D (like Vernon!). Also I think she would fit both concepts! But she unintentionally shows reverse charms like in her Never dance cover (if you haven’t watched it yet, go watch it please. you won’t be disappointed), the song is more serious but she gives off a somewhat cute vibe! I think she could rock IOI’s Very Very Very as welllll :^) (future cover idea?)

the member who doesn’t have to worry about gravity bc they basically just flip everywhere

can’t think of anyone? :OOO

the extremely under appreciated one

ummm @kiminguy??? @guanlliver??? @lovebugi??? @wanhyun??? (Mutuals on here and our SVT blogs squad!! LOOL) I love all of them and their graphics to death I will literally make a blog and reblog all of their creations 50 million times like they deserve. Of course they all have such cute personalities dlkgjfdkj but I’ll spare you from my rambling and focus on their beautiful works~ Naomi has such soft, pastel graphics (pastels are one of my fave things in the universe) and she was one of my first favorite graphic makers in the Seventeen fandom back in the day. I followed her first and then when she followed me back I was SOOOO HAPPY OMG BC ONE OF MY FAVES NOTICED ME. Next we have Yasmin and although we haven’t talked much I really adore her graphics because they’re really unique! She uses vibrant colors and dark colors so well (a thing I’d like to learn how to do hehehe) AND also pastel graphics with vibrant coloring… a jack of all trades tbh. Next, there’s Jaymee, who I’ve been mutuals with forever on our SVT blogs but I never really got a chance to talk to until recently! (And she’s the sweetest…my one and only fan….LOOOL). Once again she works with both dark colors and pastel colors very well! Her edits and graphics have a minimalistic approach to them which I admire so so much because I always cram stuff onto a canvas and get bothered when there’s empty space in my graphics. Last but not least there’s IMA!!! My self-proclaimed little sister c’: I’ve known her for most of her time in the Seventeen tumblr community and I love seeing how her works changed over this period of time. But her works always have that special charm and uniqueness that you know right away that it’s her work! No one could imitate her style and pull it off! Inimitable seventeen carat hehe Ima always has a special place in my heart. I love her coloring style, I love her graphics style, I love her. But yea as you can tell I have much love for graphic makers and more especially underrated graphic makers! Graphic makers are a blessing to each and every fandom. Thank you.

also @tokkimingi​ like we’ve never talked before but Ale’s gifs and edits are soooo high quality and have the prettiest coloring and they deserve so so so so many more notes??? Like the Ren gifset I just reblogged….this is the kind of content that should receive 1k notes okay AAAAAH @ Ale, Lillian and I love your creations so much and you’re basically the go-to blog for NU’EST related gifs and stuff AAAAH 💕💕 

I AGREE WITH ALL OF THE ABOVE HOLY MOLY - Lillian

the one that finds pleasure in other members’ demise

I’m sure this goes on a lot when people tag each other in their bias wrecker posts cough when I send Bonnie black-haired Suga pics but I see @minhwangs​ and @hwangminyeo​ tagging each other in Daniel stuff sometimes and it’s so funny loool. I know you guys are Minhyun-biased but Daniel!!!!! - Lillian

[itwillbeyourchoice]

Stefan and Elena

Send me a Ship and I’ll Break Them DOWN

How did they they meet? The men’s room

Who developed romantic feelings first? Stefan

Who is their biggest “shipper?” Me Caroline/Klaus

When did they have their first kiss and under what circumstances? Their first kiss was on the night of the comet on the porch of the Salvatore Boarding House after Elena told Stefan about how having feelings for him scared her (poor bb).

Who confessed their feelings first?Well, technically Elena confessed to Stefan first, but Stefan confessed his feelings for Elena to Lexi a few episodes before that, so I guess whichever answer you’re looking for.

What was their first official date?Did they have one? One could almost say that their back to school party/talking all night was a date, because they got to know each other really well. They’re very casual people that they really don’t have “dates,” which I think is hella cute, for the record.

How do they feel about double dates/group dates?They don’t mind them so long as their friends aren’t causing drama, which we see how that goes. Gotta give them credit for trying, though.

What do they do in their down time?Talk, honestly. They share so many ideals and care about so many of the same things that they can talk about literally anything. I also have this headcanon that they love to talk about the potential existence of extraterrestrial life outside of Earth and watch far-fetched documentaries when they’re bored. I know that sounds boring, but just think of these two cuties, cuddling as they listen to some scientist talk about so-called “evidence” and Stefan constantly trying to distract Elena by kissing her neck, and by the end she has no clue what they just watched, but Stefan managed to actually catch the majority of what happened in spite of his antics bc he’s a hella impressive man. She’d then get lowkey mad, but he knows how to make up for it because he’s Stefan fucking Salvatore. Seriously, though, they are capable of such deeply invested, passionate conversation, imagine their cute little passionate nerding faces as they talk about these things. Same goes for watching remakes of Shakespeare-inspired movies and rating them. Hottest nerds you’ve ever met. I got carried away.

What was the first meeting of parents as an official couple like?Welp, both are orphaned, but Jenna really likes Stefan soooooo.

What was their first fight over and how did they get past it?Their first fight was over Stefan not telling her things like being a vampire, but they got past it by him opening up as much as he could and also cooking for her, which is enough to earn any woman’s forgiveness. 

Which one is more easily made jealous?Elena. Stefan seldom shows jealousy because he sees things realistically for what they are. For example, look at their double date with Matt and Caroline. Actually the only one jealous there was Caroline. Plus we see Elena get jealous about Stefan’s other suitors a lot, especially after they break up.

What is their favourite thing to get to eat?Literally anything, as long as Stefan’s the one cooking. I’d imagine some sort of pasta, though.

Who’s the cuddly one? What their favourite cuddling position?I’d honestly say they’re equally cuddly, because both are super affectionate people, but they love spooning, as it’s a classic. Not ideal for sleeping, though, because he won’t let her sleep. Not much, anyway.

Are they hand holders?Fuck yeah, they are.

How long do they wait before sleeping together for the first time? What’s the circumstances?Whoops. So they had sex within a half hour (definitely less time than that) of her saying she loved him, but like it was also beautifully angsty, because he’d been telling her about how he was going to leave town to protect her and how he couldn’t be a part of her life, but then she said the thing, the one thing that made him realize he can’t leave. ‘Twas beautiful.

Who tops?Oh shoot. I honestly think it’s different every time, if anyone does more than the other, it’s most likely Stefan, but both also love when Elena does. I stand by it being pretty 50/50, though.

What’s the worst first they’ve ever gotten into?Probs one about Damon lil fucker.

Who does the shopping and the cooking?Stefan

Which one is more organized and prone to tidiness?STEFAN

Who proposes?Also Stefan. Is he pulling the weight???? Who knows?????

Do they have joined Bachelor/Bacheloette parties or separate?My guess is that they wanted joined, but the rest of the wedding party wanted separate so they could do all of the crazy shit that goes along with it.

Who is the best man/maid of honour? Any other groomsmen or bridesmaids?Best Man: Lexi Damon. Maid of Honour: Jenna I really don’t wanna pick between Bonnie and Caroline, bc I honestly think Bonnie would just get fucked over once more, and I don’t want that. Both would have two more, Matt and Jeremy as groomsmen, and Bonnie and Caroline as Maids of Honor.

Big Ceremony or Small?Very small. Elena wanted a little bigger, but Stefan is Stefan, so. He did promise that it would be as beautiful and e p i c as she wanted, though.

Do they have a honeymoon? If so, where? Yes, and I imagine they went a few places, actually. He took her to all of his favorite cities, all of which have literary and historical significance, which you know Elena would freak about. They’d probably finish at the Gilbert Lakehouse, though. 

Do they have children? How many?Do I see them having children? Do I see them having children????? Who do you take me for? Fucking of course they have children. They planned on having two, the oldest being a little girl who very much takes after her father, and the second being a very shy little boy who clings to Elena’s legs. The third was by no means planned, but she was welcomed with open arms and is very well protected by her older siblings.

Also @ladamedemartel send in the same thing, so this can answer both.

[emshirleyyyyxo-blog]

95 things

What is your full name? Elizabeth Monique Shirley

Are you named after anyone? My aunt & the Queen

What does your name mean?

The name Elizabeth is a Greek baby name. In Greek the meaning of the name Elizabeth is: From the Hebrew Elisheba, meaning either oath of God, or God is satisfaction.

Where are you from? From? I like to say Jersey.

Where do you live? VA.

Where were you born? Okinawa Japan

Which of your parents are you closest to? I have to say mom but i feel like its equal

Which of your parents are you more like? MOM

What is your favorite drink? Non alcoholic: Lemonade Alcoholic: Gin and Tonic

What is your favorite food? Breakfast

What is your favorite holiday destination? Holiday: Home Holiday (vacation): I want Disney/Universal

What is your favorite childhood memory? Growing up in Milltown walking everywhere, going to the park, pool and playing in my backyard with my neighbor.

What is your favorite way to pass time? Youtube, naps

What is your favorite snack? Plantain chips, Kettle chips, Salami, Cherry tomatoes.

What is your favorite sport? i guess to play and watch, football, soccer, baseball

What is your biggest regret? not taking advantage of college and a degree

Are you a fan of any sports team? NEW YORK. Yankees, Giants. and USA, Ecuador and Barcelona Soccer.

Are you a dog person or cat person? I feel both. I have always had a dog. now i have both and i love the cat. She's so cool.

Are you scared of heights? depends on the height.

At what age did you go on your first date? maybe like 12? I can't remember. a real date maybe like 16?

What is an ideal first date for you? Food and something fun afterwards or a nice walk to talk and get to know each other.

What is at the top of your bucket list? I haven't made one...

What is something you are gifted at? Someone told me, decorating.. lol

What is something you look for in a partner? He better make me laugh.

What is something you wish you were gifted at doing? making music.

What is the one item you can’t leave home without? Phone.

What is the best compliment you have ever received? The best one? Idk. But someone told me the other day that my hair looks so nice and healthy.

What is the first book you remember reading? Some little golden book I'm sure.

What is the first movie you remember seeing? Lion King

What is the last book you read? Im listening to harry potter on audible.

Do you like pets? Yes

Do you have any pets? Doggo and kitkat

What is the name of your first pet? Bonnie

What is your best physical feature? My eyeballs... lol

What is your biggest accomplishment? Marrying the best guy.

What is your eye color? Brown

What is your favorite color? Red or Navy blue.

What is your favorite fairytale? Beauty and the beast.

What is your favorite ice-cream flavor? Cookie dough or strawberry

What is your favorite music genre? Pop punk

What is your favorite nickname? Lizzard

What is your favorite quote? “If the crown fits” :)

What is your favorite type of clothing? Dresses

What is your most commonly used swear word? the F word?

What is your star sign? Virgo

Do you have a best friend, if so, then who? I have a handful.

Do you have a tattoo? 3

Do you have any allergies? I dont think so?

Do you have any birthmarks? If so, where? One on my chest from my mom.

Do you hold any convictions that you would be willing to die for? no?

Do you prefer kissing or cuddling? Cuddling

What piece of technology can you not live without? Phone

What was the first concert you ever attended? Britney Spears

What was your favorite subject in High School? Art. European History.

What was your first job? American Eagle

What was your least favorite subject in High School? Math

What is the furthest you’ve ever been from home? Here, VA

What is your biggest fear? Failure

When did you suffer your first heartbreak? probably middle school? I remember my first real one was when my boyfriend in high school moved away.

When was the first time you were on a plane? I was 14. going to NJ

When was the last time you cried? Last night watching a movie.

When was the last time you got in a fist fight? a real one? Never.

Who has left the most impact on your life? My parents.

Who is the best teacher you ever had? my 1SG from ROTC in high school.

Who is the first person you call when something exciting happens? My husband or mom.

Who is the first person you call when something horrible happens? same as above.

Who is your favorite musician? i have a few. its hard to choose.

Who is your role model? My mother.

Who was your first Boyfriend/Girlfriend? First ever? Nick. Middle school.

Who was your first Celebrity crush? obviously JT. lol

Who is your favorite actor? Right now? i love john krasinski.

Who is your favorite actress? uhhhh Emily blunt. it is weird they're married? lol

Describe yourself in a single sentence? RBF but funny and a good friend.

Have you ever dated two people at the same time? so, DATING is no strings attached. so yes. lol. when i was single i went on multiple dates.

Have you ever suffered a fracture? Never.

Have you ever visited a country outside your continent? Ecuador. Also born in Japan

How many Boyfriends/Girlfriends have you had? I didn't count... lol

How many relationships have you been in? Serious ones? I’d say 4

If you could give your younger self any advice what would it be? Finish School

Last time you swam in a pool? 2-3 years ago?

What is your most embarrassing moment? Peeing myself during a game of manhunt.

On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the highest and 1 being the lowest, rate your fashion sense? 7? Im average

On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the highest and 1 being the lowest, rate your driving skills? lol 6? Im average still.

On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the highest and 1 being the lowest, rate your cooking skills? 8? Im getting there.

On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the highest and 1 being the lowest, how good a kisser are you?

One thing you know now that you wish you had known as a kid? To keep all my cool toys that are worth something now... lol

The first app you check when you wake up in the morning? Prob insta.

What app do you use most? insta. youtube.

What are some of your bad habits? Chewing my lip.

What are your favorite things about yourself? Hair. Eye lashes. Personality.

What are your hobbies? Makeup. 

What countries have you visited? Canada. Ecuador. Panama.

What countries would you like to visit? Germany. England. Scotland. Europe basically.. lol

What do you consider unforgivable? Cheating

What do you do for a living? Im a sales coordinator at Homewood suites and a beauty advisor at ulta.