#and explore different angles or try to be clearer in their expression or take the opposite point of view

[seven-saffodils]

.

[freunwol]

@pukuchu submitted: i would LOVE to read anything written w eun and freud tbh👀👀 maybe like. something that explores their modes of affection/love languages for the other!!(whatever you headcanon those to be ofc)

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YELLS hello i read this and went "love languages huh. time for freud's unprofessional hairdresser carreer"

(i just think that theyd express a lot through hair related affection ok. also theyre not AS close here as they could be but thats just for this one...i may just do a sequel lolol)

but yeah this was fun to write!!! thank u for the prompt and getting me to actually write something for my beautiful dudes

___

“May I ask how you managed this?”

“No.” Eun huffed through the charred gap in his hair, sending it fluttering into a mess across his face. Freud sighed and smoothed it back down as best he could. Which wasn’t very well, considering the absolute state it was in.

“Well, I can… I can probably have it swoosh to the side, but then you’d have to part it one way for a while, and that might-”

He waved his hand dismissively. “Just make it bangs. It’ll be easier to deal with.”

Freud pursed his lips and flipped Eun’s hair. “You sure? It’s quite a lot.”

He just grunted in response, and Freud shrugged back. Not a few seconds later, large strands of ruined hair were falling away from his face, gradually making Freud’s clearer. A few more seconds, and Freud was smiling at him gently, still holding an uncut strand away from his eyes. “Hey.”

“Hey,” and he couldn’t help smiling back. And it was just a small joke, and just a simple smile, but the way his gaze made his heart flip and stomach turn to butterflies… well, an unavoidable element of getting a free haircut from the nicest person he knew, he supposed. Eun just let him do his work, and tried not to jump too hard whenever Freud mindlessly touched his face trying to get him to turn his head a little for a better angle. Which, since the bangs were apparently taking a while to perfect, was happening a lot.

“Sorry you have to stare at my chin for the next minute, I just wanna be thorough.”

He made a point of staring anywhere that wasn’t Freud. “There’s nothing to stare at. You shave down to the bone every morning, I swear.”

“Do you want me to grow a beard?”

“I don’t care. Won’t you mess up if you keep talking?”

Freud blew a puff of air in his face, sending his new bangs everywhere and prompting a gentle slap to the arm. When will the violence ever end, he could practically hear Aran crying out.

Only the quiet snip snip of the scissors punctuated the silence following, save the occasional slightly frustrated breath from Freud. He didn’t care too much how his hair looked if it wasn’t in his eyes, but it would bother Freud, so he just let him fiddle with it until it was passable.

“And… there.” Freud stepped back to admire his handiwork, a complex smile plastered over his face. “It looks alright, I think? Or… no, yeah, it’s… well, it’s a little short...”

Eun glanced in the mirror- short his ass, they were nearly covering his eyebrows. “It’ll grow out,” he still added, to placate Freud more than anything.

Freud sighed lightly. “Yeah… I’ll just keep going. I can’t really mess up the rest of your hair, I guess.”

“You definitely can.”

“I definitely can. But I won’t!”

“You don’t know that.”

“Do you want me to cut your hair or not?” Freud tutted at him, and Eun had to bite his cheek to keep from laughing in his face. “Sheesh, I go the full nine yards for free and this is how I’m treated… shameful.”

“If you wanted money out of it, you should’ve become a Hair Master.

Freud sighed as he ran a comb through Eun’s hair, hair that he’d already combed through diligently. “Maybe I should’ve. Maybe this is my true calling.”

Eun turned a bit to look at him. “We’re all gonna need a hobby after all of this.”

“I imagine I’d have different priorities in the fallout. And don’t turn your head.” He pushed Eun’s head forward to punctuate his point.

“People are still gonna need haircuts, though.”

“It’s just a hobby. And I won’t want to do it if I make that association.”

“Hm.”

The silence returned. Eun closed his eyes and tried to focus on what Freud was doing. Not too hard, for his own sake- he still wasn’t used to human touch, and the first time Freud cut his hair, he almost cried- but he focused well enough. The gentle snipping of the scissors and the occasional comb through his hair was nearly enough to lull him to sleep. So after what felt like an hour of the same, when Freud ruffled his hair, he startled with a very dignified “Meuh.”

“Good morning,” Freud laughed out, and he would never admit how that made his stomach flutter, so he settled for his blankest expression. “Is that an alright length?”

“Yeah,” he said before he even looked in the mirror. Just over his shoulder blades… Kind of short for his liking, but it would grow out too.

Freud’s hand retreated, and something in Eun’s chest clenched.

“Could you braid it?”

They both blinked- Eun had no idea where that came from, either. Freud picked his hair back up, a little hesitant. “Would that work with bangs?”

“I just wanna see how it looks.” He paused, before muttering, “You’re probably right, though…”

“If you wanted me to play with your hair, you should just say that,” Freud huffed out lightly.

Light as it was, it still made Eun freeze in place, though he managed to mumble out something like “Uh, yeah, sorry.”

A moment passed in silence, a moment long enough to notice Freud’s expression in the mirror had turned to light shock, before settling into a fonder smile.

Oh, Eun processed too late, he was joking. Oh god.

Before he could open his mouth to pivot, Freud was gathering more of his hair in his hands, fingers brushing against his scalp. “It’s not like I mind. Your hair is very nice. Not to compliment my own work.”

And lord, if Eun could just die right where he was. He didn’t want to, because then Freud wouldn’t be braiding his hair, but, well, come on.

[notabloodmage]

Handers - the first night

Finally wrote a continuation of the fade-to-black scene with Minerva Hawke and Anders!!! this is incredibly self-indulgent but i hope y'all enjoy!!!

``This is the rule I will most cherish breaking.``

Hawke could scarcely believe it as Anders cupped her face with a loving hand and leaned down, closing the distance between them with a passionate kiss. It was a moment three years in the making for the both of them. Her stomach fluttered as the apostate’s lips brushed hers.

She opened her mouth readily, reaching up to place a gentle hand on his cheek, rubbing her thumb against the rough texture of his stubble. She was practically trembling with anticipation. He smelled incredible--elfroot and eucalyptus with just a touch of ozone.

He’d clearly bathed before he came, too, his golden hair fluffier than she’d ever seen it.

She ran her free hand through it as he drew her closer, sliding a hand around her waist, clinging to her as if he was afraid she'd disappear. Hawke found his hand with hers, giving it a light squeeze before pulling away from him with a dazed smile. She gazed up at him with an expression of pure desire that it had an exquisite blush colouring his sunken cheeks.

From this close she was able to admire him fully, studying the angles of his face. He stared back at her intensely as she took a step back, never letting go of his hand.

She led him to the bed, eyes betraying her nervousness only for a moment before she found them drifting downwards, gaze landing on Anders’ (surprisingly soft!) lips.

He smirked at that, confidence clearly rising, and kissed her again, more insistently this time.

She tried to ignore the butterflies in her stomach as the back of her legs bumped into her bed. She knew he was far more experienced in the bedroom than she, and she was terrified she was going to muck this up somehow.

Despite how confident she managed to come off in public, Hawke was not nearly as experienced as she led everybody to believe.

She let herself fall back gently onto the mattress, taking in the sight of him over her with a crooked grin. He looked happier than she’d ever seen him, which made her chest ache in a way she couldn’t quite explain.

He climbed atop her, eyes trailing over her body before meeting hers with a gleam in them she’d never seen before. He looked at her with such profound, unbridled desire. He kissed her again, He explored her mouth with his tongue, sliding his free hand up her side sensually, before cupping her face with it once more. She let go of his hand so she could run her fingers through his hair again, something she’d always been tempted to do. It was even softer to the touch than she’d imagined. She hummed her approval against his lips as she worked his hair free of the tie, letting it down to frame his face. The tips of his hair tickled her cheekbones which made her smile into the kiss. Maker, she could kiss him forever.

He fit so perfectly against her, eager hands running up and down her sides as he continued to explore her mouth with his tongue. It was such a stark contrast to how he`d been with her not two days prior. He was always so reserved about touching her, stiffening at a mere brush of Hawke`s hand against his as they were walking or a chaste hug goodbye after a day of work at the clinic. Hell, even when he was healing her he could never seem to look her in the eyes. Hawke had all but given up the hope that he might be interested at all, but she couldn't get past the way he looked at her. She always found herself making her way back to the clinic to see if he was alright--if there was anything she could do to help him. Anything to hear him say her name again.

Anders pulled back, honey-brown eyes burning with a passion that made her shiver. He was so close, so warm against him. He was perfect. He was so much more than she deserved.

“Minerva,’’ Her name was a prayer on his lips as he pulled back, taking in the sight of her flushed features.

“Anders,” Minerva replied, her usual smirk and confidence fading as he studied her expression closely.

Something about the way he looked at her always made her feel so seen. Her eyes flicked around the room. Even though they were both still fully clothed, she felt exposed beneath his smouldering gaze. He cupped her cheek with his calloused hand, gently guiding her to meet his eyes, which only made her flush darker. ``I- erm, well I--`` Minerva swallowed, steeling herself.

Anders paused in his ministrations, eyes widening with concern.

“I`m sorry--am I going too fast? Do you want me to stop?” His demeanour changed so quickly, voice quivering with the fear of rejection mixed with genuine curiosity. He watched carefully for her reaction, beginning to pull away, stopping only when she pulled him back by the front of his coat.

“N-No! It's not that!” Hawke stammered. “This is, well, this is wonderful really, I don't know how I got so lucky…”

Anders’ expression softened at that, watching her intently as she rambled. He'd never seen her like this before--all flushed and uncertain. It sparked something within him that caught ablaze as Hawke stuttered out her next words.

”It's just that, well… Isabela was… my uh… my first and erm…” Hawke cleared her throat awkwardly, cautiously meeting his eyes for the first time since she’d opened her mouth. “It’s just that I’ve never… you know…” She trailed off, searching his face for a reaction.

The realization set in slowly, but Anders pulsed with a strange sense of possession when it hit him.

“You've never been with a man before?” Anders’ voice was soft. He gazed at her as if he was trying to memorize every detail of her face as she nodded.

Anders couldn’t believe it. Minerva Hawke-- a virgin?? Sort of, anyway.

The same Hawke that flirted with everyone so shamelessly, much to his entirely unjustified irritation. He figured she had as much experience as he did, and he was fully aware that she’d been with Isabela. Now he understood why Hawke had been so flustered when Isabela talked about their exploits so openly. He’d have to ask the pirate to tell him about it sometime...

He’d be lying if he said the notion didn't turn him on. The fact that Hawke trusted him to be her first was something he was going to take very seriously.

“Is… Is that okay?” She asked, her lip was quivering-- a sight that both excited him and made his heart ache for her. Did she really think he’d reject her over something like that?

He swept his thumb over her cheek, admiring the flush that painted her skin. He kissed the corner of her mouth, which made her lips twitch with the ghost of a nervous grin. She could feel his smile against her face, and the prickle of his stubble against her skin as he kissed his way up her jaw. Teasing her earlobe gently between his teeth, he answered.

“Of course it’s okay, love.” He whispered in her ear, chucking as if the notion that he’d be bothered was silly. He pulled back so he could gaze into her eyes-- a different shade of brown than his. Warmer. “Thank you for telling me, Minerva.”

She smiled up at him sheepishly, pure adoration in her eyes.

“I still can’t believe you’re here…”

“I’m here…” He confirmed. “As long as you'll have me. You will have me, right Hawke?"

She giggled at that, a beautiful light sound that he found himself chasing, laughing with her.

“Anders, I don’t know if I could possibly make it clearer how badly I’d like to have you.”

The mage smirked at that.

“I can think of a few ways.”

He descended upon her again, passion surging as he gave her several short, open-mouthed kisses before working his way down her neck. He sucked at her soft skin, leaving a trail of little marks in his wake. He ran his hands over her body before sliding them underneath her finery, cold fingers trailing teasingly up the sides of her thighs.

She let out a small whimper as his tongue slid over a particular spot on the side of her neck, so he sucked on it lightly at first, smirking against her skin before nipping at it gently. She whined approvingly, running her fingers over the feathered pauldrons of his coat before beginning to fidget with the buckles, deft fingers sliding him out of it with ease.

She eyed him hungrily as he slid her robe up, not quite high enough to reveal her center, not yet. Anders wanted to take his time. They had all night, after all, and they'd waited three long years. He wanted--needed--to make this last.

He wanted to hear what Hawke sounded like with his fingers inside of her, taste the sweet nectar between her legs. He wanted to see her flushed, fucked open, and satisfied. He couldn't wait to see what she looked like with his cock inside of her. It had been so long since Anders had been with anyone--his brief tumble with Nathaniel seemed so long ago now…

He trailed his hands up, back overtop of her finery. She wrapped her arms around him, pulling him ever closer to her. He slipped his skilled fingers into the front of her robe, widening the neckline not enough to completely expose her to him just yet, but enough to give him a tantalizing view of her chest. He teased the skin below her breasts with his thumbs, which brought a sound out of her that was a mix of a whimper and a giggle.

He smiled warmly.

“You’re so cute.”

Now that got a reaction. He’d never complimented her so casually before. He was always sincere in his thanks for her help, and he’d praised the integrity of her actions but this was different. Her flush was creeping down her neck, colouring the swell of her chest just beautifully. Her mouth was agape-- perfect lips kissed swollen and glistening in the firelight.

He brought his face level with hers and kissed her again.

And again, and again, and again.

Minerva, meanwhile, was on cloud nine. He kissed her like she was the only thing that mattered. At this moment she could scarcely recall the world outside her bedroom. That twisted world of mage oppression, qunari affairs and red lyrium seemed merely a dream compared to the man on top of her.

He moaned into her mouth when she slid her foot up his calf, tangling her legs with his. She pulled away from him with an expression he’d never seen before, and it took his breath away. It was a variation on her signature crooked grin-- the grin that’d charmed him from the start.

Now however, as she slid her robe off of her shoulders, revealing the curves of her body to him there was a new layer to that perfectly imperfect smile. It was nervous, which wasn’t entirely new-- Hawke was always smiling, even when she was terrified. But there was a new vulnerability in her eyes as they met his-- the way she seemed so desperate for his approval mystified and magnetized him.

She hadn’t bothered with a brassiere tonight--she knew what he was coming here to do, and she was more than eager despite her persistent anxieties.

She leaned back on her elbows, looking up at him with those knowing--yet still questioning--eyes, letting him take in the view of her beneath him. She was perfect against the red satin sheets in only her smallclothes, teasing her feet along the sides of his legs.

Her hair was damp with sweat, and her skin had taken upon a soft glow in the firelight. Her hair was undone, wild brown curls free to frame her face. Every inch of her tanned Ferelden skin was patterned with freckles.

“Beautiful…” Anders breathed.

She began to kiss along his jawline as he took her breasts in his hands, giving them an appreciative squeeze before massaging them gently. He rolled her nipples expertly with his thumbs, making her bite back a moan. She teased her lower lip between her teeth temptingly.

He leaned forward to kiss her behind the ear, flicking his tongue out to tease her as he began to murmur sweet nothings to her.

“Mm, your voice is so pretty, love, let me hear you.”

He punctuated the statement by sliding his tongue into her ear and pinching her left nipple gently. She whimpered so sweetly as he began to kiss his way down-- taking the sensitive flesh into his mouth to soothe it with gentle laps of his tongue.

He found himself remembering what she'd said to him all those years ago.

"Hurt me," she'd flirted shamelessly once when he tried to warn her away. "I might like it."

And like it she did as he sunk his teeth into her hardened nipple.

She moaned approvingly as Anders mirrored the treatment to the other side, sucking at her desperately. One hand teased her free breast while his other began to slide down her abdomen towards the hemline of her smalls.

He slipped his long fingers beneath the fabric slowly, teasing at the line where her hair began. She squirmed underneath him, eyes glazing over with need. She kissed at the side of face-- his neck-- his arms-- his hands-- his chest. Any part of him she could reach. She pulled him closer, spurring him on. He smiled and kissed her again, savouring every single little sound she made for him as he ran a finger over her core.

His body thrummed with desire when he found her slick with arousal, soaking the fabric of her smalls. He spread her wetness over her clit, swallowing the deliciously little squeak she made before pulling away from her mouth with a pop, watching her face as it twisted in pleasure. He circled over that spot, his fingertips painfully slow over the sensitive bundle of nerves, relishing in the choked whine that escaped her lips. She gradually abandoned her nerves and gave into the knot in her belly--sliding her hands down his back and pulling his hips against her in an unspoken request

“Anders,” The breathless whisper made him quiver.

“Not yet,” He breathed against her skin, sucking hard enough to leave a mark on a spot that had her moaning. “I’ve waited this long to have you, Hawke. Forgive me if I want to savour you.”

His eyes were ablaze

His normally brown eyes seemed to turn into honeyed amber, the lust within them smoldering outwards as his lidded gaze met hers. She trembled against him, the way he looked at her combined with the tease of his skilled hand had bolts of pleasure crackling down the length of her spine. Pure unadulterated desire. He descended upon her once more, sliding down her body with anticipation. He ran his fingers teasingly up her toned legs, smirking as she bit back a giggle--he made a mental note to ask her if she was ticklish later, because that was something he would just have to take advantage of sometime.

But not tonight.

Tonight he hooked his fingers around her smalls and slid them down her legs slowly, admiring the contrast of the red fabric against her skin.

He slid his undershirt over his head, smiling sheepishly as her gaze slid over his body. It wasn’t that he was insecure-- about his looks anyway-- but he found his stomach fluttering in spite of himself.

He wanted to please her so badly. He’d wanted to for years. Years spent getting by on sick fantasies that scandalized the spirit living within him and now the object of his desires was his for the taking, completely bare before him. Anders could still hardly believe this was happening.

“Well don’t stop there…” Her gaze flickered downwards over his body before back to his in an exaggerated manner. She waggled her brows at him suggestively.

Even through her nerves and fluster, Hawke was still Hawke.

This had him laughing before he’d even had time to be self-conscious. It reminded him of what made her so hard to resist in the first place: how open she was with her desire for him. It was far more than he deserved. He slid out of his girdle and smalls, giving a small sound of satisfaction as his aching cock sprang free.

His ego swelled at the way her eyes widened when she took in his size. His magic tricks weren’t the only thing that made him popular at the Pearl.

She spread her legs for him shyly, unable to meet his eyes, she was gazing towards the fireplace, the freckles on her cheeks disappearing beneath a dark red flush.

Even without his clothes, the room was still entirely too hot. Anders let his gaze take in Minerva’s form for only a brief moment before he put out the fire with a flick of his wrist. Darkness swept over their senses. There were still a handful of candles lit, but the light was dim enough to make her squint as she searched for his figure.

His hands found her, traveling over her figure. He kissed her clumsily, missing at first in the dark. His heart swelled as she shook with laughter beneath him.

He traced his tongue down the line of her navel to her womanhood, pausing to admire the sight from this close. She was neatly trimmed and glistening with wetness. His mouth watered instinctively.

She looked good enough to eat and Maker, was he starving.

He guided her gaze back towards him via two fingers of his gentle hand under her pointed chin, tracing the line of her jaw with his thumb. By now his eyes had adjusted enough to see hers twinkling up at him in the dark.

“May I taste you, Minerva?” The sound of him saying her name alone was enough to make her moan shyly, meeting his intense gaze, before her gaze flickered down to his lips.

He gave her what she wanted, kissing her hard, delving into her mouth with his tongue once more. He kissed his way down her body again, dipping his head between her legs, hovering just above her quivering pussy. He could practically smell her arousal.

“Well?” He teased, eyeing her cockily.

It was so often her teasing him, so he was all too pleased that the tables had finally turned. She gazed down at him with such bewildered adoration, a small trail of drool running down her chin. She looked perfect: lustful and wanton.

“Andraste’s Mercy, Anders,” She whimpered. “Please!”

Anders needed no further invitation.

He leaned forward, pressing his hands against her thighs with newfound confidence. It took every ounce of his restraint to keep him from devouring her on the spot.

He made himself start slow--kissing and sucking his way up her thighs, leaving behind deep red and purple marks that looked so perfect on her sweat-slick skin. When he reached her center he paused, looking up at her for reassurance only to grin when she slid her fingers into his hair, gripping the blond locks tightly.

He started with a tender kiss to her clit that made her gasp and tense in a way that had him smirking. He followed it with a long, slow lick up her entire slit, making good on his word and savouring the taste of her. He sipped at her like she was a fine wine, and with all his past experience from his younger days, Anders did know exactly what he was doing. He used one hand to hold her in place as she squirmed, the thumb of which he used to massage her clit with gentle, but firm strokes. The other traveled upwards, massaging her breast. She left one hand tangled in his hair while the other interlocked with his over her chest, squeezing tightly as she moaned out his name.

He was painfully hard now, but the torture of waiting was as much a pleasure to him as Hawkes sweet moans as she bucked against his face. He could spend an eternity down here. He slithered his tongue up inside her, humming in teasing approval at her squeak of surprise. He fucked her expertly with his tongue, the tip of his long nose bumping against her clit, rubbed to hardness by his previous ministrations. He couldn’t hold back his moans as Hawke began to tremble beneath him and he was able to fully taste her juices as they began to flow in earnest.

“Oh, Maker’s Breath, Anders, I- I can’t-- I- I’m gonna--” She cut herself off with a moan as he pinched her nipple playfully, chuckling against her before sucking on her clit. Hard.

Minerva squirmed in his arms, but he held her fast. She was much stronger than him, usually, but she couldn’t seem to find control over her limbs at the moment. She bucked against him wildly, letting out a choked whine as he pushed her over the edge.

He continued to lick at her, working her into hypersensitivity as she pushed helplessly at his shoulders.

He pulled away reluctantly--if she wasn’t that experienced, she probably couldn’t go as long as he could yet. The heat pooling in his belly only grew when he considered that they had all the time in the world to build up her endurance.

He crawled back up her body, guiding her up the bed and laying her head ever so gently on the pillows. She was still shaking from the aftershocks of her orgasm.

“I.. That was… Wow…” She seemed to be struggling to string a sentence together. Anders rubbed his hand along her side absent mindedly, studying her face with a loving smirk as she swallowed hard. After a few moments of panting and gentle caresses, and Anders whispering sweet nothings in her ear that made her melt, she opened her mouth again.

“I- I mean… We’re not done yet though, right?” She turned to him, running a hand down his bare chest, teasingly close to where his erect member pressed against his lower abdomen. “What about you?”

He was trying to come up with a witty remark when her lips found his collarbone and he abandoned speech in favour of an encouraging moan. She began to explore his body, tentatively at first, spurred on when he took her in his arms and placed her in his lap. Both of them cried out at the slick slide of her drenched pussy against his weeping cock. He was rock-hard and hypersensitive, and that alone was enough to shake Minerva out of her lustful daze enough to look her lover in the eyes.

“Are you alright?” Anders was watching her so closely, unashamed now that he had her permission. He didn’t miss the way her nose crinkled with her eyes as she burst into a fit of giggles. Her laugh was so musical, not self deprecating or sarcastic like it usually was. Just pure joy.

“Better than alright.” She flung her arms over his shoulder, bringing her face close to his. She was smiling wider than he’d seen in a long while (well, excluding the dazed grin she’d given him after he’d kissed her at the clinic earlier today). The sight made him feel warm in a way he’d never experienced before.

“I’ve… Wanted to do this for a while now…” She looked away, eyes trailing down his body towards the apex of his thighs. He gave a bitter huff of laughter and pulled her into him again, his kiss saying far more than he’d ever be able to with words.

“I wasn’t joking when I said three years, you know.” He looked at her like she was the only thing that mattered.

“Aching,” He whispered against her lips, he pulled her close, pressing her body against his.

“For,” He flipped them, so he was atop her once more, her beneath him on the pillows, waves of curly brown hair framing her cherubic face like a halo.

“You.” He kissed her again and for a moment he forgot everything, even Justice. For a moment Kirkwall was gone and all that remained was the amazing woman beneath him, grabbing at him desperately.

“Anders-- Please--” His name was a prayer on her lips. A chant, a song that propelled him forward. He let out a strained moan as she bucked beneath him, rubbing her pussy against his dripping cock. He was hypersensitive, every brush of her body against his sending bolts of electricity down his spine. He grit his teeth and willed himself to keep teasing her, focussing on how cutely she whined as he rubbed the head of his cock over her clit, his precum mingling with her fluids.

“Anders--”

“Ask me, Hawke. Tell me you want me,” Anders ordered, before following it up with an oh so sweet, “Please…”

"Maker's flaming breath, Anders, I’ve wanted you for so long.” Hawke found herself begging in spite of herself, shame abandoned. “Please, Anders, fuck me.”

He didn’t need to be told twice, he lined himself up with her entrance and looked deep into her eyes.

“Say my name, love.” He whispered as he slid effortlessly into her dripping pussy.

She obeyed him so beautifully, sinking her fingers into his shoulders as she cried out for him. Anders let out a moan in her ear as she clamped down at the intrusion. He pumped in and out of her slowly, shallowly at first, allowing her to adjust to his length and girth. It didn’t hurt the way Minerva thought it would, it wasn’t long before Anders had her on the edge once more, and he hadn’t even sped up yet. He fucked her sensually, gazing down at the joining of their bodies.

His hands gripped her hips with bruising force, tingling with just the faintest hint of electricity. Minerva remembered offhandedly an interaction between Anders and Isabela where an ‘electricity trick’ was mentioned, and Minerva couldn’t help but wonder if he’d try it on her sometime.

Her train of thought was interrupted as Anders let out a low growl.

“Maker, Minerva. You feel so-- ugh-- so good--” Anders separated each word with a desperate kiss on her neck, her lips, her jaw, her chest, anywhere and everywhere he could reach, he only wanted to see more, feel more, love more of her. His pace became less even as he began to pump into her more quickly. His cock was not small, and he smiled with satisfaction when he observed how Minerva’s eyes widened as he bottomed out inside of her. Her pussy pulsed and twitched, embracing him so perfectly. She felt like the golden city itself.

He continued to rasp sweet praise as he fucked into her wildly. He was a little guilty that he wasn’t going to last very long, but when Minerva began to beg sweetly in his ear once more Anders lost control completely. He wanted to see her fall apart for him, and he would fall apart for her to make it happen.

Hawke bucked her hips in perfect time with his, moaning incoherently beneath him as he pushed her over the edge. He sunk his teeth into her shoulder as he came, spilling his emission deep inside of her. He lapped at the wound as he came down from his high, vaguely aware of Hawke playing with his hair as he pumped in and out of her idly. He met her eyes again. She smiled up at him placidly.

For a moment they simply soaked in the silence, gazing upon one another. They became aware of the crackle of the fire and the city beyond Hawke’s bedroom. But it was different now.

He was hers.

She was his.

Truly, how did they get so lucky?

They dozed, tangled in each other’s arms, shielding each other--protecting one another from the world outside. Neither of them were aware of how many minutes, or hours ticked by as they held each other, until Hawke took it upon herself to break the silence:

“Want a sandwich?”

[rocknvaughn]

New Review of Colin's play A Number

Link here:

(some plot point spoilers, but mild)

The Bridge Theatre is having far greater success with revivals than it has with new plays, and no problem attracting talented cast and crew to star in them. Both of its immersive Shakespeare productions – Julius Caesar and A Midsummer Night’s Dream – have been excellent, while big productions are on the programme for later in the year including wunder-director Marianne Elliott’s version of They Shoot Horses Don’t They and Ibsen’s John Gabriel Borkman. First though, the Bridge joins both the National Theatre and, as of last week, the Donmar Warehouse in celebrating the work of Caryl Churchill with a short but superb performance of A Number.

It’s notable that two theatres have chosen to stage One Act pieces that, unusually in our era of three-hour-plus marathons, stand alone allowing audiences to be well on their way home by 8.30pm. Far Away at just 45-minutes practically feels over before it has even begun, while here at the Bridge, A Number is just an hour long. Perhaps surprisingly given ticket prices of up to £55, nothing else is scheduled alongside it, with both venues choosing to allow the singular work to speak for itself. It may not feel like value for money based on time spent in the auditorium, but in this case Churchill’s play is definitely small but mighty.

Yet, her work can have a marmite quality, creating quite divisive effects on audiences, so much of the time either you get it or you don’t. But A Number is one of her most straightforward pieces, a fairly simple narrative about a family discovering their eldest son has been cloaned. While the science-fiction surface is an examination of the effects of science on society, a premise Churchill uses to think about the apocalyptic nature of man’s own self-destructive impulses, A Number is really about lies. Across just five scenes, the writer explores the nature of deceit as a father (Salter) betrays his sons in several different ways as information about the true circumstances of their birth and early life is drip-fed to both men and the audience.

It is a clever and well executed premise, one designed to wrong-foot the audience at every turn, opening with an affectionate conversation between father and son taking place soon after the latter has discovered that clones exist. This first scene suggests a terrible miscarriage of justice in which an unknown other has effectively stolen cells from the boy and used them to make unauthorised replicas now living openly and blindly in the world, unaware of each other’s existence. Nothing about this early interaction is suspicious and it seems that Churchill’s intention may be to examine the faceless demands of scientific progress that harvest humanity’s innocence for nefarious purposes.

But that is only half the story and it soon becomes apparent in Polly Findlay’s thriller-like staging that nothing is quite what it seems in this household. A similar tactic occurs in Far Away with book-ended scenes set in a familiar domestic normality that hides (and lies about) the seamier activities beneath the surface, where the corruption of innocence is a major theme. The same occurs in A Number as the son referred to as B2 is forced to know more of his father’s choices as well as the existence of his duplicates which has terrible consequences.

Findlay quite effectively uses a square-shaped rotating set to explore the play’s themes with each new scene set at a 90 degree angle to the one before. In doing so, the audience sees every perspective on the single room in which the entire piece is set, and crucially, each of the four walls that provide the limitations to this domestic sphere in which Salter has maintained a bounded span of control for some years. Designed by Lizzie Clachan the room is exceptionally normal, a living room / diner filled with soft furnishings, family photos and some tiger prints on the wall, all warmed by a bar fire, and unlike previous adaptations that veered towards the clinical, this is a domesticated tragedy in progress. Churchill is interested in the casual monstrousness that lurks beneath the chintzy surface of suburbia, the banality or perhaps more appropriately the thoughtlessness of evil.

Findlay and Clachan’s rotating set does two important things, it changes the audience’s perspective as each new scene brings further revelation that build into a clearer picture of the people it concerns. So by the end of the play we have seen the room and the circumstances of family life from every angle. But it also reinforces the much discussed effect of cloning in which the created being is the same but different. Salter is asked by each of his children about comparisons with their brothers, and we see they are quite different personalities in the same form. And so it is with the rotated set, what we see in each scene is the same room from a different perspective, creating an increasingly disorientating effect as the story unfolds.

Findlay’s control of the tone is particular impressive, there is something unnerving about the scientific discussions being had in this bland and unexpected environment in the first scene, yet the affectionate relationship between the men seems genuine, encouraging us to feel concerned that their rights have somehow been violated. Over time, Findlay changes the temperature introducing darker notes that build into something far more sinister as the result of the initial revelation is felt across the play. As each new slant is revealed, the mood shifts with it, so worry turns to desperation, anger and foreboding as Churchill slowly and often unceremoniously reveals one crucial revelation in each scene. The return of the room to its original position in scene five is a reset in every sense, with what now seems so clearly a cycle of hope and destruction ominously about to begin again.

At the centre of A Number is the ambiguous figure of Salter, a man who seems racked with concern for the pain his sons newly endure and whose initial instincts are to comfort while demanding legal justice for the misuse of his son’s DNA. Yet, it is never entirely clear whether Salter is telling the truth or why he tells the specific lies he chooses, so many he can barely keep track of them; which son is the original, the fate of his wife, his knowledge of the cloning process and the exact chronology of his son’s childhood are all subject to interpretation as he continues to give deliberately evasive responses. He appears to lack any genuine remorse for his mendacity and there are also suggestions of cruelty to B1 whose night terrors he ignores, a child that Salter decides is not up to scratch by the age of four and simply replaces with an improved copy.

Yet, Salter is also sympathetic, a father desperate for a second chance to put things right – an outcome at the start of the play he appears to have achieved as he and B2 express a mutual love for one another and happy life to date. Salter’s later confrontation with his original son B1 leads to revelations of grief at the death of his wife and a loneliness that haunts the play as a father grapples with his own positive legacy, a need to create a good relationship with his son to guarantee his own future. The momentary pauses between the five scenes which leaves Salter alone in each room configuration offer a contemplative pause, a man isolated and perhaps even abandoned with little left to lose.

The pairing of Roger Allam and Colin Morgan is a savvy one, two dedicated and respected theatre actors who have found a valuable chemistry well ahead of this week’s press night. Allam easily connects with the many conflicting layers within Salter’s character, he is at once a man trying to find a good outcome from past mistakes and someone who lies with astonishing ease. Under pressure, Allam’s Salter runs on, saying almost anything to dilute the confrontation and his culpability for the existence of multiple children, Allam ever treading that fine line between selfishness and parental love by mixing half-truths and outright lies with genuine emotion and bewilderment.

The audience never quite knows if Salter is a good man led astray by grief and a good sales pitch decades before, selling the soul of his child to answer some deep call of fatherhood, or a mercenary man using a disarming scattiness, a failure to remember exact details to malevolently excuse himself from blame while perhaps willfully bringing about a wider destruction to rid himself of the problem. Allam is careful to offer both interpretations within his performance, that keeps the audience guessing about his real motives.

As his antagonist throughout, Colin Morgan offers an equally layered presentation of character, rising to the challenge of playing three different versions of the same man. In each of the five scenes, Morgan alternates between personas, changing accents from two variations of London to play B1 and B2 as each man separately confronts Salter. And it is a play that wastes no time, with Churchill introducing the characters post-revelation requiring the actors to begin mid-argument, already at a pitch of exasperation and confusion.

Each man is given distinction by Morgan with B2 the nervy innocent, trying to accept the new-found truth about his cloned-selves and, at first, trusting his father’s explanation with a credulousness that is increasingly naive. The confounded approach hardens in Morgan’s creation of B1 who introduces an important note of latent violence, of the possibility of physical harm as he intimidates the father who betrayed him. Each of the characters is given two scenes so Morgan finds consistency in his characterisation, switching between them relatively quickly as the responses of both men to their father creates further tension once the brothers become aware of each other’s existence. The subtle hints of the Cain and Abel struggle in Churchill’s work and man’s desire to be somehow individually unique are brilliantly elucidate by Morgan in a varied and gripping performance.

A Number packs a lot of themes, meaning and ideas into just an hour of stage time in a production that asks big questions about scientific progress, human regeneration, parenting and legacy. Churchill is concerned here with the mysteries lurking beneath a sheen of civilisation and how quickly things unravel once the veneer is shattered to reveal further deceits. With performances by two very fine stage actors, Findlay’s production asks us to look beyond the simple dichotomy of nature or nature because the advent of medical interventions into the reproductive process, designer babies and genetic modification leaves us wondering whether human individuality exists at all, and how do we control who we become?

[the-blue-fairie]

Why Elsa’s arc in F2 doesn’t work for me (and why it does.)

Yesterday, I got into a conversation with a friend where I tried to articulate why I disagreed with certain writing decisions made in Frozen 2 pertaining to Elsa’s arc. It was tricky for me to articulate because, on paper, Elsa’s arc is pretty solid. There are many good ideas and compelling aspects to Elsa’s arc and I can see why a portion of the fandom likes it so much. Elsa coming into a better understanding of herself is a great concept. Elsa being able to broaden her horizons and create a larger support network is a great concept. Elsa and Anna both coming to terms with Arendelle’s colonialist past is a really great concept. While I might personally have issues with the ending and Elsa staying in the Forest based on the material we were presented in the film, I can’t deny that conceptually, that is compelling.

Conceptually, Elsa’s arc works. My issue is in the finished film’s execution.

Personally, I feel that the plot device of the Voice unnecessarily distances us from Elsa’s emotions. By making the catalyst for Elsa’s emotional journey the Voice, the film distracts audiences from Elsa’s internal journey. Instead of having a song that fully explores Elsa’s conflicting feelings and own personal sense of denial and yearning, we focus on an argument between Elsa and an External Force. 

Yes, the film tries to make connection between the Voice and “a little voice in the back of your own mind,” but it isn’t from Elsa’s own mind. The writers could have written a less convoluted conflict for Elsa by making “the Voice” Elsa’s own personal internal conflict, but they didn’t. Instead of seeing Elsa simply making a decision for herself, we have to watch her be acted upon by an outside force first.

Now, defenders of the Voice plotline will likely say to me, “But, Liza, Elsa wants to follow the Voice. The Voice gives comfort to Elsa, allows her to realize that it’s okay to express feelings that she has already been having!”

And that’s where my frustration with the film’s execution comes into play again. Because the film never gives us a time of self-reflection for Elsa before she starts hearing the Voice. We are told in Into the Unknown that she wants to come into a better understanding of herself independently of the Voice, but we are not shown it. 

What makes this even more frustrating is the deleted moment from the prologue where Elsa asks Iduna about her powers. This little moment (which was already fully animated apparently?) does show that Elsa has this yearning even from childhood, long before the Voice. It actually sets up that Elsa wants to know the source of her powers, which is a major motivation for her actions as the film proceeds. BUT IT’S NOT IN THE MOVIE. THEY CUT IT. It’s like the filmmakers just assumed, well, audiences want to know where Elsa’s powers come from, so obviously audiences will accept that Elsa wants to know too, even though that was never a plot element of the first film, so we don’t have to clearly establish that motivation until Show Yourself an hour into the film.  

The finished film, intentionally or not, distances us from Elsa’s emotional journey. It has an amazing conceptual arc for Elsa that could provide great insight into Elsa’s internality, but, in my opinion, it fails to live up to the potential of that concept. 

Moreover, there are lyrics from Elsa’s songs in F2 that I feel put the focus on Elsa’s “destiny” and her abilities rather than on Elsa herself and her inner feelings: 

“Or are you someone out there who's a little bit like me? / Who knows deep down I'm not where I'm meant to be?”

“Every day's a little harder as I feel my power grow...”

Now, partly, I acknowledge that I am speaking from personal preference. I don’t like destiny narratives. I don’t like narratives that hinge on “the reason I was born,” as Elsa puts it in Show Yourself. I don’t like narratives that focus on a character’s birth and make so much about them rooted in their birth instead of who they are as a person - and I feel like Frozen 2 ind of falls victim to that. The film handles itself better than, say, Star Wars - but the awkwardness of certain implications leaves a bad taste in my mouth. And the funny thing is, I think those implications could have been cleared up with just a little bit more time.

I think the film wants to establish that Elsa’s powers were a “gift” from the spirits because it counters Elsa’s desperate line in the first film about them being a “curse.” The film wants to validate Elsa emotionally and I value that.

But at the same time, by going beyond that and stressing the whole “fifth spirit destiny angle” (and again, I love than Jen Lee has gone on record to say that Elsa and Anna are both the fifth spirit, but considering the amount of people I’ve seen who didn’t pick up on that, I’m kinda holding it against the film that it wasn’t made clearer), it takes the focus away from Elsa’s own agency.

Again, I’m not saying that Elsa doesn’t have agency in the film, but that the film’s choices obscure and distract from that agency.

Making Elsa a gift of the spirits as a reward for her mother’s action and as a peace offering for her grandfather’s action takes the focus away from Elsa as a person, as an individual, as a human being. It puts her on a path in life before she is even born, before she even has the capacity to choose.

Now, you might say, “But it all works out in the end! Elsa chooses to take up her destiny.” But that’s the thing. It just happens to work out in the end because the narrative was written that way. What if Elsa wanted to reject her destiny? She had no choice in the matter while she was still in the womb.

But I’m supposed to think it’s all okay because Elsa makes the choice to follow her destiny and the film doesn’t even take the time to explore the ramifications of the destiny angle it establishes.

And that’s frustrating because, as a concept, that might be a really cool and unique take on destiny. We’ve seen heroes and protagonists who have felt burdened by their destiny before, but exploring Elsa’s feelings of validation that come from learning about her destiny after Elsa spending years feeling inferior could be an amazingly fresh take!

But instead, the destiny angle is just sort of... there... Brought up in a couple lines and a couple song lyrics, seeming to have some positive implications and some really negative implications I don’t think the filmmakers were really aware they were imparting... and we don’t get that exploration - even when further exploration of that angle would only enhance the depth of Elsa’s personal journey.

Now, on a conceptual level, there are two distinct and really rewarding questions that emerge from the adventure Elsa goes on in F2. Those questions are, “What can you do for others?” and, “What can you do for yourself?” The film wants to interrogate Arendelle’s colonialist history AND give Elsa a fulfilling arc of self-affirmation - and that’s great! Both of those concepts are great! But, in execution, I feel like the finished film falters by trying to intertwine those two concepts in Elsa’s arc.

I bring this up because what if someone says to me, “But Liza, if Elsa were to hypothetically reject her destiny then the Northuldra and Arendellians would be still be trapped in the Enchanted Forest and then Runeard’s wrong would not be righted, are you arguing for extreme individualism and selfishness?” Which... No. I’m not. Elsa absolutely needs to right the wrongs perpetrated by her grandfather. Elsa absolutely needs to reflect on the ways her grandfather’s actions reverberate into the present day. That’s an amazing message for young audiences. 

But Elsa’s taking responsibility for her grandfather’s actions and finding personal fulfillment are two completely different aspects of her character arc.  

And I feel both concepts are done a disservice by the interpolation of the “destiny” elements and the “focus on magical abilities at the expense of character” elements into the greater plot.

If the film wants to be about coming to terms with the colonialist past and about Elsa finding a greater sense of fulfillment in a new place, why not give the Northuldra more screentime? Why not show more scenes of Elsa bonding more with her mother’s people? Again, there are a few such scenes - but after Elsa and Anna and Olaf head out, the Northuldra barely appear until the end of the film. Why not have them actively take part in their own deliverance? Maybe have Honeymaren and Ryder join the quest, which would allow them to develop further as characters and give Elsa characters to play off of as she makes important decisions about her life. That would make everything more personal - and on top of that, it is ALWAYS a good thing to allow characters of color more screentime and depth. 

Instead, the film focuses more on Elsa’s connection to the spirits - her friendship with Bruni (which is the most developed bond), her fascination with the giants (with whom she also barely interacts) and her respect for the nokk (which is illustrated really well by her graceful bow.) All that is decent, but it ties more into the “mythic” aspects of Elsa’s character than her humanity... and, to be honest, Elsa’s relationship with the spirits comes off as pretty underdeveloped too.

I’ve harped on this before, but what does Elsa have in common with the giants beyond the fact they are both magical? Why does Elsa say, “I feel like I am home,” when arriving at Ahtohallan? Yes, Ahtohallan has a connection to her mother and the Northuldra, but again, I’m frustrated that the film doesn’t explore Elsa’s connection to the Northuldra more through her interactions with the Northuldra.

The filmmakers had the outline of a  deeply personal, internal story for Elsa - but I feel like they didn’t capitalize on the most personal and compelling aspects of their story.

And it just doesn’t work for me. 

But at the same time, I respect and value the ambition of Frozen 2. I respect its thought-provoking concepts. And I can understand why so many people do connect to Elsa’s arc in F2 - because again, Elsa still has agency, it’s just agency that’s obfuscated by the unnecessary convolutedness of the plot and a destiny angle that isn’t really needed for the story the writers are trying to tell and (I would argue) actively hampers it. I don’t want to take anything away from those friends of mine that love Elsa’s arc in F2. Your perspective is beautiful and valid and wonderful. 

But at the same time, I also feel that people who argue something is “off” about Elsa’s arc in F2 come from a valid place as well (at least, the arguments of people who are arguing in good faith - not the people arguing in bad faith).

Everyone’s perspectives on a piece of media are valid. Everyone’s perspectives emerge from their own experiences in life. I’m simply trying to give voice to mine - based on my particular emotional connection to Elsa as a character, my interpretation of Elsa, and my personal distrust of destiny narratives. 

[realityhelixcreates]

Beta, Theta, and Me

Chapters: 2/? Fandom: Thor (Movies), Avengers (Movies) Marvel Cinematic Universe Rating: PG Warnings: Swearing, Homelessness,  Relationships: Loki x Reader (But not right now) Characters: Tony Stark, Thor(Marvel), Loki(Marvel) Additional Tags:  A/B/O, Sorta, More Of An Exploration Of Life And Self Expression Within An A/B/O Framework, Loki Does What He Wants, But Loki Does Not Actually Do What He Wants, Antagonistic Bosses, Managerial Differences

Summary:  As it becomes clearer that your immediate superior hates you, and clearer that Tony needs to put someone somewhere else, you get caught up in things that are way above your paygrade.

“Mr. Stark!”

“And now I gotta deal with this.” He muttered, closing a holo-screen and whirling in his rolling stool to face her. “Florence! Surprised to see you. Isn't there somebody else to see to whatever problem you have?”

“It has to do with that new hire, Whom you forced on us. Since it has to do with her, I bring it to you.”

“Hey, do I pay you for sass?”

“No, you pay me because I am the best at what I do. I mean to continue doing it.” She slapped a paper down in front of him.

“I don't like being handed-”

“That's why I didn't.” She tapped the paper. It was an application. “She has falsified information. Look.”

He looked. He couldn't help it. Florence reminded him altogether too much of one of his old nannies. He could never disobey that woman either.

On the application, next to Secondary Gender, you had scrawled not the usual α, β, or Ω, but a θ instead.

“Maybe...it's a sloppy Beta? Like just a really sloppy B?”

“Except she writes a perfectly legible B later on. Also, this address is false. No one lives there, it's a storage center. I wouldn't put money on that phone number being legit either. On top of that-” She said, cutting Tony off. “I have caught her filching food from the employee cafeteria.”

“Oh yeah? What did she take?”

“Creamers, jelly, crackers, and salad dressing packets.”

“So...all the stuff we offer for free?”

“With purchase of something else.” Florence sniffed. “Also, I caught these this morning.”

She held her phone out, showing slightly blurry pictures of a person who might be you climbing out of the dumpster behind the building.

“Okay, that doesn't necessarily prove anything.”

“And I've caught her sleeping around the building.”

“On the clock?”

“On breaks, and sometimes before her shift.”

“So, not on the clock.”

“Sir, she is breaking the law!”

“Well, so did you when you took that picture without her consent. I don't tolerate spying on my employees.”

“Sir!”

“What's the real problem here, Florence? That she's homeless? Don't we want them to go get jobs? Then suddenly she's got one, and you're like, no not like that?”

“I just don't understand why you are rewarding a stranger for breaking the rules. Indecent exposure in the bathroom, and you give her a job. Lying on her application, and you defend her. You don't even know this girl, you don't know why she was on the street, what warrants might be out for her, what problems she might have, what havoc she might cause. That nonsense symbol on her gender identification alone shows she's not taking this seriously!”

“Theta.” He murmured.

“Pardon?”

“It's not nonsense, it's a Theta. It's just another letter. We use it in mathematics all the time; it means there's an angle.”

“Is she trying to tell us she's crooked?” Florence demanded.

“She's probably just a Beta who thinks secondary gender inquiries are an invasion of privacy. It's all the rage among the young people these days. In any case, just keep her on for a week or two. If she's gonna wash out, you'll know by then. It'll give you the chance to do a few more interviews. You're still looking for extra help, right? You've got permission, go on ahead and do it. Two, three more people.”

“Well...Alright.” Florence said, mollified. “Thank you sir.”

“You know I got your back. But we gotta shake things up every now and then, keep things fresh. Get in people from all walks of life, keep in touch with the pulse of society, all that. Now run along, dear. You've got a ship to keep shape, don't you?”

“That I do, sir.” Florence left, forgetting the application behind her. Tony held the paper up, examining it. Fake address for sure, and likely the number was for a burner phone. Age, education, and work history looked legit. There was a year and a half gap between your last job and this one: it probably marked the amount of time you'd been on the streets.

A Theta symbol. Why that, specifically?

“You're not too fond of Florence, are you?” F.R.I.D.A.Y. asked.

Tony shrugged. “Not really, but she's damn good at her job. That's all I really need from her. Would you do me a favor and look up gender expressions pertaining to Theta? There's a lot of new terminology I need to get caught up with. This might be one of them.”

                                                                                  *****

You sneaked another sugar packet from the ground floor coffee shop, fully aware that the amused barista was watching, and didn't care in the slightest.

You sprinkled a tiny bit into a little container of coffee creamer, then knocked the whole thing back like some kind of shot.

Everybody knew now that you worked here, and if they speculated about your bizarre eating habits, none of them said anything to you about it.

As long as you didn't break any rules, nobody seemed to care.

Fine by you. Even though they were small, simple snacks; salad crackers with tiny packets of jelly, butter, and salad dressing, sugar, salt and pepper packs, creamers, ketchups, mustards, and mayonaise, these were quick and easy sources of calories that hadn't been readily available to you before.

Having a fresh uniform each day was kind of amazing. Florence insisted that all uniforms be cleaned and disinfected properly, which meant they all got left behind at the end of the day, and were clean by morning. It had the added bonus of no one seeing you wearing a Stark-affiliated uniform while you were sleeping on the fire escape, or hanging around near the dumpsters outside

You weren't exactly friends with the baristas here, you never even talked, but ever since you had run a creeper out of the shop by being generally stinky and unpleasant to be around, they had started disposing of their expired muffins and cookies by wrapping them in wax papers or bags. Their boss hadn't caught on yet, but you were deeply grateful to them for every bite you salvaged from the trash.

Soon you would get your first paycheck, and then you could buy a decent meal. You'd been planning and dreaming of what it would be. Steak and potatoes? An omelet? Maybe just a regular old hamburger and Coke?

It might be the only paycheck you saw from Stark Industries though. You'd overheard Florence and Khalil talking, and she was determined to be rid of you. Khalil didn't really seem to agree, but he had kids at home, and probably couldn't afford to argue.

It didn't matter. Even if it was less than a week, you could put Stark Industries on your resume forever now. That would get you in the door. Janitorial training was a pretty good skill too. Every business needed cleaning staff, no exceptions.

Things were really looking up for you.

No one had even called you on all the weird stuff you'd put on your application.

You hadn't lied, exactly. Not exactly. Sure, you didn't live permanently at the address you'd provided, but you did sleep there sometimes. And you had gone to the school you named...before your parents completely succumbed to their paranoia and pulled you for homeschooling. The hadn't wanted public educators to fill your head with 'propaganda'.

And that was your phone number, though you'd have to buy some minutes when you got paid.

It was all at least semi-true.

Even the Theta was a symbol you had picked up off the internet, when researching what was wrong with you.

You tossed back another sugared creamer.

Having a routine again felt good. It had been over a year, but you slipped back into civilization pretty easily. You were so lucky. You always told yourself that.

Yeah, even if Florence gave you the boot, you still had options. This chapter in your life might soon be coming to an end.

Soon. You just had to wait, and work.

                                                                                                                                                    *****

Tony looked over the long, primly written list with amused disbelief.

“Is this...Is he serious?” He asked Thor. “I literally cannot tell when he is being serious, and when he is trolling me.”

“Welcome to the last thousand years of my life.” Thor said dryly, taking the list from Tony, and skimming over it. He held his hand out for a pen, and when Tony handed him one, he began crossing things off of the list.

“No...No...Absolutely not...Oh, he just put that one in there to annoy me...” Thor handed the list back. “But for the most part, yes. He is serious. Whatever else he may be-” He paused at Tony's muttering of 'war criminal' then forged on. “He is still the Crown Prince of Asgard, and the true King of Jotunheim. He is entitled to certain amenities. And then there is his...condition to think about.”

“Crown Prince of-no offense-a set of postage stamp sized fishing villages in Nova Scotia, and true King of a planet so far away that they can't even reach us to take him back. What exactly does he think he's entitled to on an enemy planet? He's here for punishment, right?”

“He's here for rehabilitation. And so that we can try to winkle out the information that we need. The goal is that he comes back to one of Asgard's 'postage stamp' villages eventually. But that man is still out there, and it's altogether too likely that he will make his way here. We're going to have to indulge my brother a bit, if we are to get information about it. Besides, he has proven himself a hero already, and suffered for it. He has earned a bit of leniency.”

“So you say, your majesty, but...” Tony scanned the revised list. “...I think I can provide most of this. But...servants? We don't really do that around here.”

“He will need assistance. And Loki has never been unduly cruel to servants who had done nothing to trouble him.”

“Okay, but what do you mean by 'trouble'? I mean, I have a few people in mind, but they all live here, and might not be instantly comfortable around him. Is he gonna whip someone over dropping a plate, or folding a cape wrong?”

“He is in no position to do so. And he never went so far back home, so I honestly doubt he would do so here. He knows full well the effect he has on the people of this world.”

“Anger and terror?”

“Pretty much.”

“Look. I'm not going to send him a servant. He'll get a maid, and nothing more. If he drives them off, he won't get a replacement. One chance. I'm not putting people at risk for his whims.”

“I couldn't ask for better than that. But time is of the essence my friend.”

“I better get some royal kickbacks for this.” Tony grumbled.

“I'll send you some Asgardian postage stamps.” Thor joked, leaving the lab.

Tony turned back to his desk, pulling up his holographic display. A short list of Greek letters that he'd been learning about popped back up.

“Okay, Theta.” He said. “Time to show me what you're worth.”

                                                                                *****

The fight started out as an accusation of theft. Florence had caught you with an Iron Muffin-a specialty of the ground floor coffee shop-which you had filched from the dumpster that morning. You'd tried to claim that you'd bought it, but then she'd demanded to see your receipt, and it had just escalated from there.

You were two words away from just quitting then and there, mostly so that she couldn't fire you, when Tony Stark had reached out of the elevator behind you, yanked you into it, waved goodbye to Florence, and shut the doors. As the elevator began to rise, you wiped a few angry tears out of your eyes, embarrassed that he had seen that.

You seemed altogether too prone to show this man your worst sides.

“I'm sorry sir.” You said. “Florence and I don't really get along.”

“She needs to be challenged sometimes. However, I am perfectly able to sass her myself, and I can't have disruption in the janitorial team. Can you imagine the uproar if the floors didn't get waxed properly at night?

Anyway, I thought we might chat about some of the information on your application.”

You were screwed. Could you be arrested for lying on an application?

“Oh geez. I'm sorry about that, but-”

“Yeah, I know. You have to write down an address, but you don't really have one, do you? But you can't leave it blank, so you improvise. I looked you up though. Your family seems to have a history of...shall we call them 'rebellious acts'?”

You hung your head. Fuck. He knew about that too.

“I'm not like them.” You muttered. “I'm not that stupid.”

“Sure hope not. Anyway, wanna tell me what a Theta is? Like, in your words.”

“You won't believe me.”

“Why wouldn't I?”

“Nobody does.”

“I can fly. I've been finding things easier to believe since then.”

Well, that was fair. He was Iron Man. He'd been involved with aliens, and killer robots, and terrorists. Why would this be too weird?

“It's kinda like a Beta, but I have an Omega's sense of smell.”

“And Alpha's pheremones don't effect you. Right?”

“R-right...” How did he-?

“You presented me with a conundrum, and I couldn't leave it alone. I needed to find out what you meant, but it wasn't exactly easy. I had to get on tumblr to figure this out. I had to learn what a demi-omega was, to figure this out. I never thought I was out of touch, but damn if you young-uns haven't come up with some creative new lingo.”

“It's just that the world is more complex than a mark on a paper.” You said.

“Don't I know it!” He laughed. “But that's not too bad, is it? Not being overpowered by Alphas? Sounds nice.”

“It's not so bad, but most people think there's something wrong with me. It's not just the Alpha pheremones, I just don't feel-wait a minute, where are we going?”

The elevator had passed the labs, far above the highest floor you were supposed to be allowed to access.

“We're headed to the residential area. Me and Pep aren't the only ones who live up on the top floors. Top dozen or so are basically penthouses, though they aren't all consistently occupied these days.”

You remembered watching footage on the news of a fight at an airport. Avenger versus Avenger. It was terrible; both you and your old roommate had cried a little. It was an awful thing, watching your heroes come apart.

You were kind of glad you didn't have any superpowers or anything like that. You wouldn't want to be at the beck and call of any government, much less more than one. It was something you had actually agreed with your parents on.

“Why are we going up there? I'm not supposed to be here.”

“You're with me kid; you can be anywhere. And anyway, the best way to keep cats from fighting is to separate them. So, from now on, you are a maid.”

“A maid? I don't know how to be a maid, I just started being a janitor!” You protested, then told yourself to shut your trap and not argue with the boss for not firing you.

Tony shrugged. “What's different about being a maid? You still clean stuff, only it's a home instead of a museum. You might need to cook something every now and then. Can you cook?”

“A little bit, yeah.”

“Not gonna lie; it's not a walk in the park. But it comes with a pay upgrade, and an apartment off the penthouse, so that's two of your problems solved.”

Suspicion began creeping in. This was all way to good to be true.

“Why me? You have to know that I'm not as qualified as the other janitors. What's the catch?”

“Well, the catch-” The elevator dinged. “Oh, look! We're here!”

The elevator doors opened. Standing right in front of them, in horned helmet and armor, stood Loki, the destroyer of New York.

[rorykillmore]

idk a lot of my ask ideas are about villanelle but. what are her thoughts on like? ruby and weiss right now?

i was gonna wait til after this most recent icc to answer this one for convenience and currency’s sake

if you told me when i’d first picked up villanelle that she’d bond really strongly with two traumatized world-saving teenaged girls i’d be like. well okay, that’s panfandom, i guess!

no but it’s funny because her relationships with both of them really just started out more like... humor-based, like, hunter and i really just initially threw ruby and villanelle together because we thought it’d be funny, and weiss and villanelle were initially mostly fun because weiss is one of those few people who can get away with just absolutely DRAGGING villanelle

but then they... started falling into doing some more serious rps, like ruby and villanelle’s truth compulsion glitch icc, or the stuff weiss and villanelle got involved with with masky which dug into a lot of core issues, and a certain point me hunter and jay (and fate, because fate and i already had a groundwork of a plot with fox and villanelle) were just like. why not do a super tragic plot with these guys! it’ll be fun!,

anyways, skipping ahead a bunch, her relationship with both girls now is obviously very different than what it started out as. and that’s certainly surprised villanelle as much as anyone. she has a stunted ability to form attachments the way regular people do, not just like edgy loner characters who take a while to trust but like, from an actual psychiatric standpoint it’s harder for her to bond and feel those bonds even when she wants to. if she had healthy resources to like, learn about that and understand it, maybe it’d be easier, but she doesn’t sooo meaningful progression kind of often boils down to interpersonal... conflict and trauma challenging her relationships with people and making her really FEEL things. healthy!

anyway that’s veering off into a ramble a bit; i was just trying to say that villanelle has learned to love ruby (and she and weiss haven’t been as close, but i think villanelle certainly feels a legitimate attachment to her too at this point) in the span of like. a few months, and everything kind of fell apart and went to hell in those same few months. and while she’s definitely learned and taken some important things away from how to function in... any kind of relationship and how to care about someone else, it’s all still very kind of new and (because of the circumstances) dire and like. frankly, if you’re someone like villanelle, you don’t just get GOOD at loving another person over night, and there’s a lot she doesn’t know how to navigate.

so since graceplot she’s... for the most part, kind of kept her distance! not just because it would have been dangerous for her to just go back and resume a normal life or whatever, but because obviously ruby and weiss have both had serious cause to question how much they trust villanelle, and villanelle... doesn’t know how to reconcile that. like... some form of interpersonal redemption might be feasible to villanelle’s character in her learning how better to treat and reach out to the people close to her, but she still has such limited empathy for the ordinary people around her, and such an easy capacity for effortless violence and killing.  so how do you reconcile that with two people who have dedicated their lives to protecting others? even if they’re not actively in conflict, there are just things about each other that they will never be able to understand, and villanelle is so used to defining her relationships in terms of “how much are they like me, how much can they understand me, how much do i understand about them”

so while she’s been grappling with... that, ruby and weiss have been dealing with their own fall out post-graceplot, and some of that has nothing to do with villanelle and more to do with ruby and weiss as people and everything they’ve already been through. but. i think last icc, villanelle kind of realized that... keeping her distance just seemed easiest for her, and also seemed like the thing that would be easiest for ruby and weiss. whereas meanwhile, ruby and villanelle have had an entire conversation about how ruby feels about the responsibility of leadership and why she can’t burden other people with her problems, and she also knew that GRACE had done something to ruby that ruby couldn’t remember, and maybe her being around to kind of keep an eye on both of those things could have! helped prevented this! at worst she could have just told weiss, and weiss could have approached things from a clearer angle

but self-reflection and self-criticism are very much still things villanelle is... just getting her toes wet with, so she doesn’t necessarily know how to express them or how to be constructive with them. so going forward from here we’ll see how her relationship with both girls evolves -- she might at the very least make clumsy attempts to be more present, but that involves... probably having a serious talk about Things at some point. and she and ruby still have the upcoming mess with felix to deal with, so i’m sure how THAT plays out will affect things too.

but yeah overall i do really enjoy her relationships with both of them and how far they’ve all come on denny!! villanelle has this really expressive unexpected... softness to her that’s explored a liiittle bit in canon, but only in a romantic context, so it’s always interesting to explore what that means for her when it comes to platonic love and what she’s capable of learning from it and also how ruby and weiss themselves feel about and react to their relationship with her because it’s just.... it’s really complicated, at this point! for all of them. but that’s when you know you’ve built up a really good, meaty character dynamic

[laughingpinecone]

Press Start letter

I am laughingpineapple on AO3

It’s a whole lot of character combos so the specific requests aren’t overly detailed, please draw at will from my general likes in addition or as an alternative to those!

For any of these, I’d be thrilled to get any small situation or event that highlights the dynamic you see between these characters - show me what ties them together, what could make them drop their barriers with the other person. Or a big situation! I like plotty fic too! But especially if we matched on some bizarre “&” combo that never even interacted in canon, I’d love to simply see what a scene between them could be like.

All requests are art or fic - for art, the stuff I like is the kind that depicts the characters doing something. I’ll aways be happier with a very simple drawing of two characters walking together or sharing a cup of coffee than with an ambitious composition that looks like an Avengers poster.

Likes: worldbuilding, slice of life (doubly so if the event the fic focuses on is made up but canon-specific), missing moments, 5+1 and similar formats, bonding and emotional support/intimacy, physical intimacy, lingering touches, loyalty, casefic, surrealism, magical realism, established relationships, future fic, hurt/comfort or just comfort from the ample canon hurt, throwing characters into non-canon environments, banter, functional relationships between dysfunctional individuals, unexplained mysteries, bittersweet moods, journal/epistolary fic, dreams and memories and identities, canon-adjacent tropey plots, outsider POV, UST, exploration of secondary bits of canon, leaning on the uniqueness of the canon setting/mood, found families, characters reuniting after a long and/or harrowing time, friends-to-lovers, road trips, mutual pining, cuddling, wintry moods, the feeling of flannel and other fabrics, ridiculous concepts played straight, sensory details, sickfic, places being haunted, people being haunted, the mystery of the woods, small hopes in bleak worlds, electricity, places that don’t quite add up, mismatched memories, caves and deep places, distant city lights at night

Cool with: any tense, any pov, any rating, plotty, not plotty, IF, nerdy canon references, unrequested characters popping up

DNW: non-canonical rape, non-canonical children, unrequested ships, canon retellings, consent issues

Ghost Trick

For applicable characters, I am very interested in them finding about the erased timeline, but not getting their memories back, and having to live with being told about what they did but never remembering it. All what-ifs welcome (what if they managed an acceptable happy ending but didn’t reset the timeline, what if a different party went back to the past and kept their memories, what if Alma’s ghost stuck around...) Also open to AUs here, especially for generic fantasy or sci-fi settings or the Final Fantasy ones I prompted for Yuletide

Alma & Emma: an unlikely friendship, and/or something about a book that was clearly inspired by the best detective(s) working for Emma’s husband?

Alma & Sissel: domestic ghost tricks and an increasingly suspicious Alma - or a great team after she finds out what the cat can do!

Cabanela & Jowd: the loyalty... the determination... but how does Jowd express his side of their bond? What’s a Cabanela-being-Cabanela or Jowd-being-Jowd situation that’d be insufferable for anyone else, but which doesn’t bother the other one, who finds it kind of endearing?

Cabanela & Kamila: best uncle and that’s that on that. Does he teach her magic tricks? Is he not great with kids but makes an effort? What does she build that just blows his mind?

Cabanela & Missile: guard dogs bark bark. They obviously adore each other, what else can Cabanela teach Missile - and what can Missile teach Cabanela? What could they disagree about?

Cabanela & Pigeon Man: how do they meet in the new timeline, what makes their odd friendship stick this time? I love how they play off each other, with Pigeon Man’s snark bouncing off Cabs' very secure ego... does Pigeon Man end up feeling fatherly about him, in some way?

Cabanela/Jowd: please no infidelity, I only like the ship without Alma during the canon times when Alma is dead or at most a what-if where she’s not around. Did Cabanela lower his mask for a hot minute during their walk to the minister’s office, did those ~immeasurably deep~ feelings ever find an outlet? What if he’d stayed dead and tagged along with Jowd and Lynne after 15? What if no-reset scenarios? Or office shenanigans where Alma is backgrounded by virtue of not working there but she’s okay with what’s going on.

Cabanela/Jowd/Alma: what’s a hobby one of them has that the other two are dragged into? How about a day at the beach? Or in a cabin? I’ll take hot springs or basically any standard anime filler plot too. Unless you want to write about their get-together, which will never get old for me - Cabs’ stoic pining and Jowd and Alma realizing they want him and telling him is my catnip

Jowd & Lynne & Memry: please show me the Worst Mentor doing his Worst Mentoring? How is chicken involved? Do the two young detectives give him some hope for the future? What’s Memry angling for, actually?

Jowd & Pigeon Man: anything about their friendships from back in the day when Pigeon Man was still Jowd’s coroner to a new timeline where PM is still fascinated by meteors/astronomy/alien conspiracies and Jowd humors him…

Jowd & Sissel: oh the shenanigans. Some clever communication between them, on a case or otherwise? Sissel doing cat things? Gossiping through the ghost world?

Kamila & Amelie: what are they like a few years down the line, how has their friendship evolved? Throw all your aged-up headcanons at me!

Lynne & Memry: next generation detectives! Action! Ridiculous murders! Secret ghost cats! A little bit in the future maybe? Odd girl & odder girl teaming up and leaning into each other’s quirks… maybe undercover?

Lynne/Memry: same as above but they kiss - and Memry trying to get through Lynne’s obliviousness sounds like my kind of fun.

Pigeon Man & Blue Doctor: for how long has the blue doctor been a secret agent stationed in this country, has Pigeon Man crossed his path before?

Rindge & Lynne & Memry: Rindge’s burden is to be the normal one in a cast of unabashed weirdos. Memry won’t let him live it down. Lynne is faintly amused, and wishes the three of them could get a big case to show off their amazing skills...

Sissel & Missile & Lovey-Dove: pets doing pet things! What’s Lovey’s secret, how is she so blue and so strong? Sissel and Missile are on the case!

Cabanela: blind me with sparkles. I love Cabanela being fierce and dazzling bright and determined and loyal to the very end, dancing to his own rhythm, so sure of himself and of his ideas that he doesn’t even need to prove to anyone that he’s right. Too sure of the wrong idea, once, and everything crashed and burned. Casefic with ghosts? External pov about how various characters in the Special Investigation Unit see their boss?

Dark Souls

I’m only familiar with the first game! It’s probably relevant to mention that I think that linking the fire is kind of a dumbass move. There’s no winning move in this world, or at least no obvious one. It follows that I see Solaire as kind of a dumbass, tragically, inescapably drawn to a false flame even in his better ending, a paladin in a world of uncaring gods - if the topic comes up, I’d just prefer if the narrative didn’t validate his choice. Feel free to deviate from anyone's canon endings, to make things happen that'll stave off their hollowing.

Solaire & Siegmeyer: they’re both questing all across Lordran, any chance of a meeting? Could two good-natured people feel less hollow for a while in each other’s company?

Solaire & Laurentius: sun VS pyromancy go! Do their philosophies clash or can they find common ground?

Solaire & Logan: what’s Logan’s tolerance for sparkly sun boy? And what about THEIR philosophies?

Unlimited:SaGa

I’ve been in love with this game since it came out and the Scarlet Grace announcement got me all fannish again! Feel free to expand upon any of the game’s settings, they’re so charming and all so vague!

Iskandar & Leith Torles: well I spent the whole game waiting for some exposition about these two and what little there is... is in the artbook, according to the wiki? Could you expand upon that or make up something else?

Pharr & Grace: friends! And adventuring! Telling friend about adventuring? Leading friend to adventuring and discovering she’s quite apt herself?

Laura: some down time with anyone in her scenario? Or Mythe’s scenario fwiw. Who does she bond with aside from Henry?

Platyphyllum: what’s it like for a plant to travel with animals for a while? Feel free to have them bounce off anyone in either of their routes, or anyone in the cast really.

The Last Remnant

David/Rush is a welcome exception to my “no unrequested ships” DNW. I’m very interested in post-game exploration, and getting a clearer feeling of any of the cities and assorted places.

David Nassau & Torgal & Allan: like a platonic V, I’m intrigued by Torgal’s chillness toward David and by his conflictual relationship with Allan. Put all three of them in the same room and...? Skilled diplomat vs catty cat and poor Torgal in the middle?

Emmy & Glenys & Sheryl & Kate: I don’t have a specific plot hook here, I just love them all, they’re very different people and I’d like to see how they fared traveling together - or reuniting after the end of their travels! Or four unconnected vignettes, one each.

Pagus & Maddox & Sibal & Zolean: this is a ‘please adopt Zolean, he’s sad’ plea. He lost an old friend and the other three can sympathize with that, I think, and drag him into their renewed friendship and bond over being old soldiers. And three Qsiti and a Yama are fun to picture...

Pagus/Maddox/Sibal: old men being together like they couldn’t be in their youth when life got in the way, please? Get-together (who makes a move…?) or established Qsiti triad would all be amazing…

Pyre

Any cutesy activity lifted from the game would be great, like X doing laundry with Y. Any postcanon very welcome with any combination of endings as long as the revolution was peaceful. I love everyone so much. Good with background ships I requested (eg Vofred/Tariq or Bertie/Pamitha mentioned in a Volfred&Sandra fill for whatever reason), Hedwyn/Fikani, Reader/Sandra and Volfred/Oralech if applicable.

Big Bertrude & Volfred Sandalwood: something nice Volfred does for Bertrude? Some mild adventure as he brought her to the Nightwings? A bizarre request for her shop? That dialogue about their relationship slew me dead - friendship through unrequited love is one of my rare tropes, so I’d like to see any aspect of their bond. Or epistolary with an ending that splits them, either way?

Big Bertrude & Sir Gilman: consider: sneks. Tiny snake looking up to grumpy bundle of snakes in a trenchcoat. Doing snake things. SNAKES. Her convo about ascended Gilman is adorable and I wish we could see that begrudging affection in some actual interaction...

Big Bertrude/Pamitha Theyn: they just get each other and it slays me. A friendship and then more for them alone, away from the rabble of the Blackwagon... Bertrude patching up her wing best as she can... joining Pam on her travels (and complaining the entire time)...

Jodariel/Celeste: if the Heralds make it to the Union to get a shot at living a life of their own, and Tariq already has his friends and his interests in the material world, what’s left for Celeste? Maybe she could find herself unexpectedly close to Jodi, who’s good with distance and silence and also feels like the world doesn’t need her anymore...

Jodariel & Sir Gilman: On war, honor, the Bloodborder… Sir Gilman is in awe of her, obviously, but is she in a state of mind where she can be boosted by his unrelenting energy?

Tariq & Big Bertrude: he knows how to treat a lady!!! And her usual tricks just bounce off his back like water off a very polite duck. In short, they’re the perfect comedy duo, or they could be brought together by a serious cause like a Volfred in distress?

Tariq & Sir Gilman: it is a known fact that the chivalric code includes the protection of the weak and defenceless and the respect of the honour of... the moon?

Volfred Sandalwood & Sandra: banter banter banter Scribes. He usually banks on his age, but he’s a baby compared to her, and their views are distant but both reasonable... did they ever have a chat when he was the Reader of the Nightwings, or does the Reader bring her along for a visit postcanon?

Volfred Sandalwood/Tariq: All I know is Tariq of all people fell and fell hard - he makes it sound like Volfred is the biggest deal ever and he’s some servant… but he’s the herald and Volfred is actually some dude who got kicked Downside (albeit a particularly charismatic and idealistic dude). And I like this double imbalance very much. What happened in the woods during Volfred’s self-imposed exile? Or do they find each other again after the ending, in the Union? If you want to lean on how alien Tariq is and/or how tree Volfred is, please do!

[nicole5208849-blog]

Week 12

This week in class we were introduced to Photography, a field I am interested in but not so good at. This activity enabled me to view and rate my photographs of the UNSW environment using Adobe Bridge, learn some basic techniques to improve my photographs (through extensive researching on Lynda, reading through the links provided in the blog and online sources) and begin to form a basis to critique my photos based on the criteria, allowing me to move onto the next step to edit my photos.

Before starting the activity, I sat down and began watching the videos on Lynda (only chapter one at that moment) and started to explore the links in the blog. From this I developed an understanding about photography when it comes to taking pictures which allows people to be drawn into the experience and question what is trying to be conveyed through each shot.

Before taking photos and analysing the UNSW environment I started to experiment with Adobe Bridge and Adobe Photoshop when editing and laying out images. However, experimentation led me to Adobe light-box where I found a lot of settings that allowed me to edit the photos easily and effectively.

When taking photos I considered different elements of photography in order to capture the essence of the environment and UNSW campus, which includes: the light, colour temperature (cold or hot), direct or indirect, natural/ artificial light, reflection, texture, shadows, capture movement, story telling, emotion or intellectual response, elements of design, etc.

http://www.cambridgeincolour.com/tutorials/camera-lenses.htm

Walking around UNSW for 2 hours I compiled 45 pictures in total. From this I began to ‘favourite’ some pictures out of the total which allowed me to condense my findings to 10 photos. From here I began editing the critiqued photos (A portrait (preferably of a complete stranger), something from the built environment, something from the natural environment and an interesting detail). I edited all these photos on Lightroom CC, which allowed me to experiment with the contrast, light, dark, highlights, exposure, etc.

 (Before then After picture) v

I experimented with reflection of the tree onto the grass while also capturing the design of the building, clearly creating a link between the natural and man-made (UNSW building) environment. I enhanced the colours of the photo (creating a more bold and darker layer).

(Before and After) v

I wanted to capture a reaction of ‘something funny occurring’ (narrative), so, as I took this photo I decided to crack a joke in the process of the shot, which allowed me to capture her facial expression before she started to laugh. This gave the photo more interesting elements. With this I also enhanced the photo making the environment around her bolder.

(Before and after) v

I wanted to capture more of the natural environments colours, so I experimented with the density, dark and light colours as well as the shadows. This allowed me to capture the texture and colour of the tree, making the picture look more intriguing and detailed.

(Before and after) v

To highlight the orange colour of the building I increased the light and dark densities, allowing the orange and yellow to stand out more.

(Before and after) v

Same as the previous photo I took a photo of the main strip. Not a lot of people were walking at this time (1:40pm) however I wanted to capture the environment and the main area people walk through. Playing around with the shadows and black and white tones it allowed me to emphasise the trees, however this technique subtracts the main emphasis on the walk way. To fix this problem next time I should wait around until more people walk past as well as experiment with other angles.

(Before and After) v

To capture the environments natural elements I placed the attention on the sun by increasing the light tones but also decreasing the dark tones to show more of the leaf and branch outlines.

Things I learnt:

- Research first

Always (before beginning activities) conduct research online as you will gain a better/ clearer understanding about photography and the overall task. 

- Patience 

Patience is a virtue, in order to take good shots, sometimes you need wait around and analyse the surroundings in order to take the right picture at the right time

- Shots 

Always take more then one shot at one area, BY changing the lighting (if possible) and taking photos at different angles and times of the day.

Overall, this activity allowed me to become more familiar with the techniques of photography and the process of planning photos on the spot, how to take numerous photos at different angles and at different times of the day as well as how to edit photos through a range of software applications in order to further convey an idea, story and/or acknowledge the beauty of the natural environment.

[paganchristian]

A view through the kaleidoscope.  I was actually surprised you could take a picture this way and it would come out as clear as it did but I don’t know that much about cameras or picture-taking so what do I know about it.  I don’t read the manuals or anything but just take pictures and know only a few very basic things about how to use a camera and many of the settings are a mystery to me. But anyway, I still get satisfying pictures for myself, even if they aren’t so wonderful overall, and I guess that is really how I feel about my life in general.  I don’t want to aim high, it’s too much work, too much time, and concentration and I don’t have the energy or focus to even do that, without compromising something else.  I will be a jack-of-all-trades, well not even that, but I don’t know.  I actually feel like I have very special narrow interests and even though that is true I don’t necessarily reach a high level even in those areas, but so what?  In many ways I feel that my lackluster state protects me from the pitfalls of pride, and of falsity and from accomplishments that are supposed to be more meaningful than they would really be to me, and it I guess kind of all goes back again again again, as ever, to the whole childlike state.  I feel very naïve, very simple, very almost the word might be immature, in many ways but in the ways I want to be more advanced, I am.  If those ways are only a very few still I feel much better than the other way around, like I used to be, when I was far more normal, socially approved of, and meeting the standard expectations of my age range in all kinds of areas, when I was a younger adult.  Not that I was ever that normal, but as normal as I could manage then, and I have just let it totally be untended, like a garden now overrun by weeds, and I like it this way.  I need it this way, not just like it this way.  

It makes me think, looking at this picture, that the more spontaneous random turn of events often will completely transform my view, my experience of things, like a changing kaleidoscope angle, and yet it’s just working with the same few beads, mirrors, nothing much has changed, no real magic trick, and it doesn’t take genius, it’s more random luck and the flow of events, if I am attuned and ready to seize the opportunity. 

But not that the opportunity is that amazing either, it’s not that terribly different than the view before, it is still after all, just the same few beads, the same mirrors, a life as simple as that, metaphorically, but it’s enough, enough for me.  

So today I feel challenged by illness, and by the feeling that my family has kind of blocked me out, the my future with my marriage may be doomed to misery once my child grows up and I’m stuck alone with my husband, but the alternative to being with him is a vague undefined, terrifying and weak-looking thing that might be even worse than to stay with him, and then I think about my faith and lack thereof, and I think about how to teach my daughter, what to teach her, and I think about how to try to reach my family who has blocked me out in so many ways, but is there still a way to reach my family member, and I think about how to heal my own life, and make it more healthy and responsible, but to be responsible to all I wish I might be able to do, am I able?  Or will I always be just like so many others, unable to do all I want to do, because I’m too ill, physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically, philosophically, existentially, spiritually, and whatever, I feel ill in these ways, though of course that is kind of confusing, what do I mean, for example, “philosophically ill”?  I couldn’t necessarily explain it clearly if at all, and I’m not in the mood for more of that vague dry excess of words trying to explain what ends up being unclear still and needs to be wasted more and more words,..  To try to say why I didn’t mean this or that thing, this or that potential insult or negative idea, that it sounded like I was saying.  Some things it feels are just so incredibly hard to say, maybe because few have said such things, and I don’t have a framework to articulate these ideas that mostly are just things I have come up with on my own, without being able to talk them out.  If I could read and talk all about it then maybe I would internalize the language I had used with others and have a clearer way to say it all.  Maybe.  But even then maybe not.  Maybe I’m just not always very good anymore at expressing myself clearly, even if at one time they all said I was just an amazing writer, all in all, totally great.  But though some little strains of talent in writing might remain, maybe mostly my writing has deteriorated or maybe it’s that I try to write about things that are harder to express these days.  Or harder to put into poetic language, because if I’m not just emoting and being creative and talking about vague ideas, that poetic language often doesn’t flow and fit, anymore and maybe I’m not good at logical language so much.  

I sit here in a crisis of faith wondering why and where does it lead.  But a crisis of faith is a frequent companion and I never said otherwise and it doesn’t mean something amazing won’t change things as often happens to me too.  Something to make it all feel compelling, convincing, trustworthy, hopeful, safe, good, and whatever else that God and my religious or spiritual belief system is supposed to be.  Even then what is faith after all?  Is it not just “being comfortable with not knowing”, as I heard someone put it in a video recently?  Where do you draw the line at how much you have to know or how much is ok to admit not knowing?  Why is goodness and virtue supposed to be linked to knowing things and being certain?  What does that have to do with love?  Doesn’t it often really go the opposite of love?  Because if you have to believe certain things in order to be a good person, then you will judge those who don't’ believe as being bad, and you will try to make them believe as you do, not because of giving them your love and respecting their free will (which is a part of love, a necessity for real true love), not because of love,...  but because you feel that if they believe they will be good and you want them to join the club of the saved.  And you’ll argue and give them no peace and make all kinds of rash and inconsiderate and dangerous and harmful decisions based on that need to try to push them or convince them or make them do things and see things your way, to make them believe with the same certainty that you have.  And how much of that is based only upon the need to believe that you were raised with or taught, rather than a real true certainty?  But because you have to fake certainty, now you must push that on others or punish them with it.  

The ego reacts to the need to be certain, because it then feels safe.  Even if that certainty doesn’t make sense but if the ego has fooled itself it makes sense and it is safe, then it is at least somewhat satisfied and will desperately protect the illusion of safety, control, power, comfort, predictability, stability, and all those thing that make the ego feel pacified.  Because the ego is just the survival mechanism of our minds and personalities which tries to adapt to the fear, the danger, the confusion, pain, manipulativeness and so on that society, nature and our own mental confusion rage down upon us.  The ego doesn’t make any more sense than the chaos it is surrounded by.  But many people, all their lives never find a way to transcend the egoic errors or the chaos that caused their egos to be so mistaken to start with.  Because they’re mired in the culture, the beliefs, the relationships, the society, that formed it all.  They feel pulled along by the speed of life, the force of life and culture, and it feels inescapable and horrifying to think of even questioning. 

Only suffering and humiliation pulls you out of it, breaks you down from that.  It has a chance to do that but sometimes it works the other way and breaks you down worse than before.  I keep hoping the suffering that I keep encountering will help.  But sometimes too much suffering is really too much and doesn’t lead to clarity or anything good.  I haven’t bought the idea that every form of suffering has some kind of meant-to-be point, lesson or character development, the silver lining that makes you stronger and doesn’t kill you and doesn’t make you weaker in every way, mind, body and soul. With or without God’s help, no matter how you try, not assuming a false certainty that you don’t really have or feel.  Some of these ideas are based on things that are in some of the videos I’ve watched lately, with Richard Rohr, and so I guess I’ll mention that since it does borrow heavily from the ideas in those videos.  Not that I feel I’ve fully grasped some of his ideas and not that I think I necessarily agree with all that he says either.  I feel that some of what he seems to present I would probably disagree with quite a bit, but I haven’t really looked at how he presents all of it, so perhaps sometimes something seems like something that I would disagree with and then when i see what they are really saying, I agree.  I don’t want to get into all the things he says or claims because that is just one more debate arena, in addition to the one I’m already trying to make sense of now, with the path I am considering.  But I’m not so much considering these other videos, well, in a way I am, but it’s not a cohesive path I feel I’m trying to adhere or engage as much as I can in all it says.  I’m still in the exploration phase where I might just move on to the next thing in a few weeks or months for all that I know.  But with the other path, I’ve been tangled in it for more than a year, and even if I can’t call myself one of them, I can’t disentangle myself from all that holds me attached to it, convinced by parts of it and disturbed and hurt and confused and in a crisis of faith on other points. 

[creativespecialism]

Tuesday 21st September, Story art: introduction

in this workshop we were given a brief overview of storyboards and why they are important in animation. We also had a look at different camera angles and such. In this workshop, we were given the task to create a board for an exert of Iron Giant

I approached this with some  trepidation, having not done any story boarding at all. I wasn’t really happy with the work I did in the workshop. The boards I made weren’t really thought through enough and were messy.

I went home and did some research. To try and inspire me and help me make them better before i moved on to doing the composition pass.

I tried to take this research into account when it came to both the composition and the rough pass and looking at the different examples really helped.

Overall I think what’s happening in each panel is mostly clear although I don’t think it’s quite as dynamic as it could be and there is also problems with balance. I don’t have a specific reason for Hogarth’s head to be touching the top of the frame. it just is because I ran out of space

.

 As I developed my board into a rough pass I decided I wanted to go down a more comedic route with touching undertones. I think this one has better composition and its a lot clearer but lacks needed detail and could do with some different shots and probably more panels. I really like the idea of the speech being part of the animation but after having some feedback I realised how I’ve placed it is not how storyboard artists normally show it. I was also told that dot-outlining the camera is a bit of a cheat. its enough to just show the rock because there’s already the association of the rock with the camera.

Moving forward I took what I had done so far onto the bigger template so i could make more in-depth notes. I added eyes where I hadn’t before because I felt it was important to show the facial expressions and decided to scrap the part where Hogarth reaches behind and tries to feel around for the camera because if he’s already looking around, he doesn’t really need to take that action because he can see that it’s gone.

With this story board I tried to ask myself what kind of person Hogarth is. How would he do things. I tried to look at the extract and think about how it would work in real life and I’m not sure whether I was entirely successful so I look forward to exploring it further.

[chezzkaa]

Spectral Scrawls

Chapter One: Grave Hopping

A/N: Hey all. Have a random mini fic that I absolutely adore, brimming with ghostly charm and sensitive perceptions. Not sure if it’s worth exploring and posting, so let me know! I certainly have a plan for it in the future, if it’s something you guys would like to join me for.  [Master List]

Pairing: Jeremy Dooley x Reader

Summary: Haunted by the pain of your past, you struggle through life with the help of your boyfriend, Jeremy. Equally out of his depth with his abilities, the two of you support each other as best you can, ultimately offering the prospect of moving in together. But having interacted with a lost and broken spirit on one of your late night adventures to explore the world of the macabre, you’re left to deal with a haunting of a different kind.

WC: 3407

The iron bars grate across my front as I shimmy through the gate, bag clasped in my hand and mustard yellow sweater catching against the rust. The soft earth gives beneath my feet, sneakers sinking into the mud cling to life of last night’s rainfall; the graveyard still, as though death himself slumbered atop the banks beneath the blanket of stars. A deep sigh is all it takes to get moving, weaving in and out of the crumbling tomb stones, the names embossing my back and floral notes clinging to my jeans. It doesn’t take long to relax in the calming peace, the mossy smell of the surrounding forest filling my lungs and clogging my nose with pleasantries. It accompanies me when settling on the bench nestled between the stones worn with mistreatment and forget; a wing of the yard long since gifted to the overgrowth.

From the bag clatter a collection of candles in frosted glass and tea lights by the dozens, each fluttering to life with the fizz of a match, my attention caught in the flickering flame before it curls into a smouldering remanent. Scattering them around the seat coated in moss, my legs pull up and I plant my feet against the damp, protesting wood; body angling to rest the journal jammed with loose pages and spilling sticky notes against my knees. Pages crammed with creativity, notes scrawled between the sketches I’d worked so hard on but hated for the imperfections I just couldn’t seem to fix. There was always something, a curving angle I couldn’t fashion, the twist of a smile far too forced and smudged with irritation.

Under the cool shine of the moon I put pen to paper, the warm flames chatting with the gentle breeze and rustle of leaves. Though the graveyard hadn't been my first stop on the night’s journey, adventuring further into the silence to explore a world I’d held in curious light, it would most certainly be my last. The morning hours trickled closer with the inevitable colours streaking the sky; calling for me to wander back to the achingly empty home and battle the loneliness seeping from the walls. To smell the bitter dust and lingering anguish trapped in the cracks; creaking to life with each groan beneath my feet.

I’d been there for an hour, legs growing stiff and butt numb atop the cold dampness taking over my jeans, encased in the darkness of death and writing about the light. Unafraid of the sharp calls of owls or the whistle between the tomb stones, calmed by the gentle breath of warm air tickling through my hair and bringing with it an unusual sense of comfort. The voice creeps faint at first, but strengthening with curiosity as it sounds from behind. “What're you writing about?” I jump; startled and glancing around with confusion that knits my brows at the sight of nothing. Only the grass waves back, whispering to the weeds winding through the rocks. “Whatever I can think of,” I say to the stars, feeling exhaustion finally returning to drag me back to delirium in the vain hope I’d sleep.

I reposition on the bench, legs creaking as I lower them, shoulders popping as I prop against the back to peer around the tomb stones. No sounds other that the wildlife rustling, nothing else breathing but me. Preferring the subtle silence to the screams of anxiety, the calm of a place left without judgement easing the scolding words I carried, still stinging in my shoulders. A soft sigh escapes, face settling into a smile with the swaying of trees and the warm flickers of candle light. “Are... are you alright on your own?” This time his face presses against my peripheral; stationed as though he’d been there all along.

Beneath the moonlight his hair is dusted silk, sweeping with a graceful curve away from the strong lines of his calming face. His blue eyes shimmer, constantly moving in the light with an array of deep, agonising tones to brighter, more joyous sparks, but still somehow soft and anxious. It’s difficult to focus on his body, attention trapped by the shape of his shoulders and the strength of his jaw. The hollow of his throat dipping gentle to flow into strong collar bones exposed beneath an oversized sweater, tattered and littered with holes.

He waits for my response with the patience of a saint, the atmosphere shifting anxiously with a tilt of his head and tentative smile. “Yeah,” I breathe, shuffling to get a clearer look at the man who seemed only a fraction older, mature expression brimming with a boyish charm. I wondered if he felt the aches of age far too early, whether he saw the world and let out a rattling, exhausted sigh – or whether it was just me. “It's not as scary as you'd expect. No way near as terrifying as adulthood.”

“Normal people are generally afraid of graveyards, and things that go bump in the night.” His lips don’t move, but his chuckle is warm across my skin, like a reassuring embrace. The air ripples around his body as I try to concentrate, blinking rapidly as his image fades and distorts beneath my sleep drunk stupor. Pressing a palm to them, I rub, vision readjusting to see he's shifted to the other side of the bench, though I’d swear he hadn’t moved. “Things that go bump in the night should be afraid of me.” I find myself joking, looking down to the notes and closing the book in your lap, his deep warm chuckles hugging into my back as I grow surprisingly grateful for his unexpected company.

“Maybe it's just me that doesn't like graveyards,” he muses softly, the candles flickering with the movement of my feet, hands pushing up the mustard sleeves slipping over my fingers. “Can I sit with you?” His question is careful, as though he feared the prospect of burdening another with his companionship. I nod, hearing his feet whisper and the bench creak beneath his weight, a relieved sigh disappearing into the night. “Of course, I’d appreciate the company, honestly. Hang around as long as you’d like,” I greet, looking up but finding nothing but a feeling of warm, protecting comfort; the man nowhere to be found.

“Oh... alright then,” I murmur, frowning up to the moon, eyebrows knitting together as isolation burrows between my shoulders. A deep sigh rattles through my lungs, lips vibrating and fingers drumming before I open the journal again, its pages falling heavily from all that was plastered inside. With the sweet smell of moss and his shining eyes hovering just out of reach, I begin to sketch. Working with the strong set of his jaw; the slight bend of his nose, and the angles of his neck diving into collar bones with an array of pencils. Lead smooth against the grain as I shape the tilt of his chin, the curve of his shoulders and folds of a sweater that was far too large. Everything screamed power, unshaken by the cold creeping across the back of my neck, but in his eyes I found nothing but contradictions. A softness that constantly swelled like gentle waves touching the shore; and a quite rush of insecurity that’s deafening if just spared the time.

I’m too lost in his vulnerability, masked behind a boyish smile; recognising it from each time my eyes passed over a mirror. My reflection a shattering similarity to the pain he’d never intended me to see. Looking at the sketch propped against my knees, I can help but stare at the face looking back, long lashes burying the tears sprinkling the pages. I soak them with the mustard sleeve gripped in a fist, unsure where the emotion was coming from, rippling through me in resonating waves.

I don’t hear grounds keeper until the sound of his boots kicking at the dirt press against my mind, eyes flicking up to the spot I know he’d round. Collecting my supplies, I abandon the candles, smiling down at the journal before the footsteps eventually throb in my ears. “Come on,” I murmur to the book, gripping it tightly and taking off towards the back of the yard, morning sun streaking the looming clouds as I weave carefully between the stones. Stretching around the perimeter stands a wobbly stone wall, crumbling at the touch of my fingers as I begin to climb, feet slipping but balance unquestionable. With a little exertion I make it to the top, jeans catching on the stone as I watch the light chase away the shadows, grounds keeper finally rounding the corner to spot me. His gruff scolds follow as I drop onto the street, a small breath pressing from my lungs from the impact shaking in the soles of my feet.

The warmth radiating from the journal clasped in my hand provides comfort, inhaling the cool morning air as I slip it into your bag; eyes stinging in the sun creeping through the building slots. Replacing the bound pages of the journal with my phone, a quick text sends me in the direction of home; my sneakers brushing the laneways and dipping in receding puddles dotting the path. The dreary village never appealed. Nothing changed, the people remaining as stagnant as the buildings, drooping being the weight of age and soggy weather. I pass by the small shops that had once seen me squeaking with glee, the smell of the bakery doing nothing but churning my stomach, the absence of a hand in mine stinging. I try not to dwell, quickly escaping the memories haunting the familiar path to my house, the white walls cut with strong brown beams welcoming me back with lacklustre enthusiasm.

My fingers trace the short wall lined with weeds, the old gate rusted and reluctantly responsive, shrieking open to scuff the stone pathway. Up the steps I take in threes, faded red door rattling open with a turn of keys before I abandon them on the hallway counter. Delicate cream walls turn away, ash wood floor boards uneven and scuffed as they rush away, stumbling up the stairs lined with muted ancient ivory carpeting. I spare little thought to the pictures clinging to the walls, faces behind the frames pleading for recognition, accusations pelting my back until I reach the kitchen through the doorway on the right.

Even here the empty dining table wails, the pretty Alice blue run laced with gold and overflowing with frothy flowers – long since expired – do little to hide the mourning. The kitchen counters are cold to the touch, stinging as I toss my bag down on the grey marble surface, fridge humming in disapproval. I don’t linger, snatching the stepping stool from between the cabinets and fridge to clack them open, clambering up to reach into the higher cupboards. An irritated sigh sees me straining, fingers finally connecting with the china travel mug, clutching it close to my chest as I step down and return the step; my phone erupting. I don’t look at it, already knowing where to go. Instead I grab your wallet, and collect mu keys, snatching a grey beanie before the front door slams to keep the ghosts of regret at bay.

I see him immediately, hair a deep sorrowful blue as he hunches in a booth, weighed down by anxiety and the stifling warmth saturating my lungs. I order my drink from the bubbly and bright woman at the register, knowing not to ask if their banana bread was in stock, already aware that the answer would be no as I slide her the travel mug. Rather, I purchase two gigantic cupcakes loaded with sickening icing before approaching the man, bottom lip drawn between my teeth. While passing I rest a hand on his shoulder comfortingly, confusion and bitterness swirling in my chest until I break contact, offering the beanie and a warm smile. He accepts it with an anguished groan, japing it on to hide his hair, eyes sunken in dark bags as he watches me sit and slide a muffin to him.

“There’ll be others,” I reassure softly, his head falling into his hands as he rubs his eyes. “You saw it coming, right?” he states through his cage like fingers as they drag over his beard, shoulders heaving. My face contorts, heart aching at words that weren’t intended as accusations, but stung all the same. “Yeah,” I admit, leaning into the table to peek up to his face, the chunks of his hair left uncovered swirling a deeper purple, barely noticeable beneath the blue. Carefully I sweep the locks away, embarrassment and concern colouring my finger tips, a sharp pain dusting the top of my right arm, “that’s why I planned coffee.” His head lifts, chestnut eyes looking at me with a mixture of affection and thanks, the strength of his jaw and broad shoulders that stretched on forever standing as a great contradiction to the man’s softness. His eyes shift as he watches me, his strong fingers wringing together as nerves tremble beneath his heather grey sweater, concern colouring his cheeks as his face falls and lips press into a critical line. He lets out another groan, forehead now resting on the table. “Awwh damn it,” he expels, the server wobbling towards our table with unsteady drinks, “what is it this time?” “Jeremy,” I try to reason, but he powers forward, defeated. “C’mon, Y/N, spit it out. What other horrible thing’s gonna happen?”

“Slide all the way to the left when she sets the drinks down,” I sigh, giving in, “and take your muffin with you. I’m not having a $5 investment destroyed.” On command the waitress arrives, stumbling in her heels as she sets our drinks down, Jeremy’s toppling to smash across the bench; though his spot is no longer occupied. Pressing his body against the opposite side of the booth, his hands grip the cupcake with a comical face, his right shoulder sprayed with now nonthreatening glass fragments. Her gushes of apologies have the server rushing to receive his refund and another drink, oblivious to the relieved expression colouring his hair an indigo blue beneath the beanie. “Thanks,” he breathes, lips tugging into a smile as I return it, response time slow from the exhaustion setting into my bones. “No worries,” I reply, sipping on my drink and rolling the warmth between my hands, “it’s what I’m here for.”

“Nah,” he rejects, holding at a hand to me once the waitress has finished mopping up the mess and spewed another incomprehensible number of apologies, “you have other benefits, too.” “Oh yeah?” I tease, accepting the hand after hesitating, warm comfort sizzling my skin, his adoration lacing my knuckles with a refreshing, subtle smell of lemonade. “What else am I good for?” “Being the best damn girlfriend in the world,” he states proudly, a blush rising in his cheeks as he smiles, blooming flowers invading my nose with a gentle tickle. He notices my face twitch, his lips splitting into a smirk. “Too sweet?” “Yeah,” I laugh, a sound now only a few managed to draw from the depths of my chest, “just a little.” “I’ll tone it back,” he tries, but I shake my head, gripping harder to the hand he attempted to retract for my benefit, a faded red pulsating around him momentarily before dissipating.

“Please don’t.” His eyebrows quirk as he smiles softly, placing his other hand atop mine; another gust of flowers swirling. “It smells like spring.” “Aww, spring’s your favourite,” he chuckles, looking genuinely flattered by the impact his actions were having, feelings of comfort leaving my body to taint his own, “does that mean I’m your favourite?” “Would I be about to ask you to move in with me if you weren’t?” The shock of his surprise bites, my hand flinching away as I shake it, trying to expel the stinging and glaring half heartedly. He reacts with stammers, sunflower yellow glowing golden beneath his hat. “Are you serious?” he demands, challenging my offer in disbelief. I just smile, a beaming grin reserved for special occasions. “Of course, I’m ready for it to be spring all the time.” “Won’t it be painful?” “Only when you’re not there.”

  Exhaustion sets in as I force my feet to touch the steps leading home, cracks uneven beneath my sneakers. Tumblers turn with the key I jam into the lock, bitterness catching the back of my tongue distastefully. Opening the door, I expect the familiar moans of the house, the same dusty air to invade my lungs with cold, stinging accusations; but as I brace, nothing comes. Instead the hallway welcomes me, a confusing warmth resonating from the floor boards, cream walls smiling down as I take a tentative step inside.

I can’t remember the last time the house had held so much cheer, uncharacteristic and uncomfortable as I beeline towards the kitchen, the smell of moss so strong it burned. I wanted nothing more than a cup of tea, something warm to fill the hole exhaustion had dug, drained and buried beneath the toll of emotions. Though the offer for Jeremy to move in had been sudden, it felt right. The idea of spring filling the home for even a day sees my heart leap, desperate to wash away the stagnant pain still lingering, burrowed into the carpet.

The kitchen is somehow warmer, the fragrance of forest trees and blooming moss clearing my lungs, giving an unanticipated moment’s peace as I collect the journal from the bag, eyelids weighed down with sleep. Looking up I freeze, book clattering from my hands at the sight of a pained, confused face; eyes silver with agony, hair as pale and shining as silk. Pages spew around my feet, fluttering in the astonishment tainting my skin with cold nausea, the smell of forest far too strong. My kitchen flickers with his static form, void of pigmentation bar the translucence mirroring the longing emptiness swirling in my chest at the sight of his panic, dwelling in the smell of his burning frustration.

He seems equally taken aback, eyes searching my face and hair constantly shifting in the still air, question faint and fractured as it shatters the silence. “Y/n, where am I?” The sound of my name uttered in a whisper from his still lips has the world flashing, darkness swallowing my vision and filling my senses with the smell of stale pond water and the hammering of rain before I’m spinning, gripping the bench to stop my knees from buckling. The kitchen swims into a fuzzy focus, the alarm in his eyes screaming while his face struggles to remain calm, childlike confusion peeking through the mask with every twitch of his lips. “How do you know my name?” I’m surprised by the strength of my voice, unwavering and brimming with authority. At the sound the man’s head shakes, attempting to back away with his hands raised in surrender, he movement flickering through his body.

“You told me,” he urges, blue eyes pleading and scared, “I told you mine was Ryan, remember?” “No,” I say shortly, trying to control the wobble shaking my legs as I push through the undergrowth clogging my mind with a freezing sharpness, lungs struggling to operate through the waters of anxiety pressing down, “you left before I could tell you.” “Oh, that... happens sometimes,” he admits, embarrassment tainting the world a deep blush pink, sweet like scorched caramel. I cling to the emotional embodiment like a life line, hauling back to plant myself firmly back home; his words swimming through as his lips make no effort to form a whisper, “I’ve never met someone who could hear me before. I don’t really know what I’m doing.”

I shake my head, expelling the remaining foreign memories to sink to the floor, knees colliding with faint thuds against the wooden boards. The smell of moss washes over me, curling around my shoulders as his image fades with my realisation, understanding thick with sympathy. Though he no longer stands before me, I feel his presence, warm and confused as it settles on the opposite side of the kitchen. “Did you follow me home?” I ask, vainly hoping that the answer would go against my better judgement, but the confirmation I needed doesn’t come. Instead a strained, sorrowful tone greets my question, “I don’t think so...?”

[authenticaussie]

✿ 20 SaboAce?

20. underwater kiss

The aquarium hadn’t meant to acquire a mermaid. It certainly hadn’t meant to acquire Sabo, angry and half-blind and terrified of any of the mermaids that looked like him, and when Ace had found out he’d stormed Shank’s office in his half-off wet suit and demanded that the mer be put into a private tank. 

It’d taken a solid ten minutes of arguing, but Benn stomped in near the end and pointed angrily at the puddle on the carpet, making Shanks groan and relent, agreeing to let Ace work with the young mer. 

It had felt like no time at all until they’d been friends; Sabo had been suspicious and stand-offish at first, but Ace had learnt patience over the years, and used the time by Sabo’s tank to describe his favourite shows and books.  He’d managed to coax Sabo into speaking a few times thanks to his curiosity about human terms that the mer had never been privy to, but bringing up relationships from Ace’s favourite shows and complaining about unwarranted kisses had led to an awkward conversation that’d left him red. 

Sabo had laughed at him, mimicking the sound he’d heard Shanks and Benn release, and Ace had threatened to withhold sharing anything else until Sabo had pouted, blue eyes welling up with fake tears. Ace had groaned and sighed and complained but eventually began to talk about his favourite foods, musing out loud about what to bring for lunch. 

Sabo had perked up at that, and then they’d begun to talk properly, debating the merits of different snacks and trading recipes. Most of Ace’s couldn’t be made underwater, so he began to bring them in for Sabo to try, and was soon regaled with some of Sabo’s own shoddily made snacks. 

Sabo had laughed at him when Ace accidentally choked down what Sabo had used as a plate, and Ace had demanded that the “food” section be made clearer, considering how often humans ate seaweed. Sabo’s retaliation had been to hand feed him, his fingertips pressed against Ace’s lips, (which hadn’t been good for Ace’s sanity) and Ace had replied that usually it was the other way around, considering his job. 

It’d spiraled into a discussion about Ace’s work in marine preservation, the other mer who sometimes visited on exchange and to teach them, and ended with Ace boasting about his ability to hold his breath. Sabo, delighted, had challenged him to get his wetsuit and swim in the tank, exploring the space he’d made his own, and Ace, unable to resist the expression on Sabo’s face, had gone to get it. 

Sabo gave up so much just to talk to him; it seemed only fair that Ace sacrifice a moment or two of air to see his home. Sabo’s species of mer was designed for the deep ocean, and he needed to stay almost partially or fully underwater in order to properly breathe, which meant their conversations got interrupted frequently for Sabo to submerge and breathe. 

The water was cold even against the thick padding of his wetsuit, and Ace couldn’t help his tiny shiver, watching Sabo grin, all sharp teeth and awkward angles. It was funny to see what Sabo had adapted to and learnt about, living above the water. He’d never smiled before, muscles unused to it, but he’d quickly gotten used to Ace’s bright grins and began to copy them. It certainly didn’t help Ace’s pleasure about that fact to know that Sabo most often graced him with said smiles.  

Sabo held out his webbed hand, letting Ace take it carefully, and then Sabo pulled him deep beneath the surface of the tank. 

Ace closed his eyes against the bubbles, feeling them brush past his eyelashes and over his cheeks. He knew he’d blown his cheeks out, instinctively trying to hold more air, and Sabo’s hands cupping his face made him quickly try and swallow it down so his face was flat. He heard soft laughter, twisted by the water, and cautiously opened his eyes to see Sabo grinning at him, delighted by what Ace had done. 

Ace fastened his hands around Sabo’s wrists, feeling his body pulled upwards by the air in his lungs, and tried to blink past the burning in his eyes. He may’ve been good at staying under water, and lived by the ocean his whole life, but his eyes would still sting if he kept them open to long in the salt. 

“Okay?” Sabo mouthed, and Ace nodded, bubbles escaping from between his teeth as he grinned. Sabo grinned back, flashing sharper teeth, and Ace almost laughed at what Sabo had picked up from him. Not manners, or slang; no, only smiles and the concept of kisses. 

(A moment later, it was no longer a concept).

[titmasjack]

Storyboard Workshop Task

In an effort to adapt what we had learnt with Helen Schroeder in our first workshop exploring the impact of the use of storyboards in Industry. We were tasked to take what we learnt and express these ideas and processes into a new experimental storyboard that utilised the explosive creativity of incorporating all of these elements. 

Considering cinematography, the characters placement in the frame and the variety of shot types, I set out to change the audiences expectations and interpretations of my character than my original storyboard. To introduce a more gripping and thematically tense tone to my work, I discuss how each choice of shot feeds into one another to build and expand beyond my original ideas.

Breaking the Brief

Going against the original intentions of the brief, with the option to incorporate a range of perspectives and camera shots, I wanted to ensure that I didn’t go overboard and incorporate unnecessary perspectives that would confuse the audience. As although I wanted to build the tension and suspense of my work through cinematography, I still want to convey a sense of clarity through my narrative. 

In comparison to the briefs rule of no camera movement, I have to consider how I can work around this idea by manipulating the character around the three-dimensional plane around me. Utilising all the space, I shouldn’t limit myself to the singular plane of my original storyboard and should consider using the space available to show a greater sense of depth and perspective between my character and the ‘Mystery Box’.

With the ability to introduce alternate angle and explore camera movement throughout this experiment, I want to try and also incorporate the rule of thirds, something I’ll be able to translate to my own work after, I want to pursue how I can convey a struggle or difference in power through the framing of my characters alone. 

This inevitable tension is what will help drive the conflict between the two elements and establishing this through composition will help support the audiences ease to read the power shift and fluctuating dynamic between the two. 

Post-It Note Outcome

Using post-it notes to create another rendition of my original sequence. This storyboard builds upon my original intentions by including a variety of camera angles and much more passes to show a clearer breakdown of my intentions of the key motions and interactions of my character. 

A cowboy walking and interacting with the box, my original idea lacked a lot of clarity in its use of posing and silhouettes, not being as well defined as they could be, this rendition gave me the chance to redefine the key poses for stronger emphasises and impact.

Taking this into consideration, this allowed me to explore how far I could push my characters expressions by expanding their actions beyond their original form. Expressive and pantomime-like this honed in on the explosive and charismatic energy we were encouraged to explore through our animations.

No longer limited to the six-frame breakdown of my original storyboard, this gave me the change to expand and incorporate a much cleaner series of frames that showcased a more fluid and organic transition between each movement. Whilst still nowhere near perfect, these rough renditions give me a better understanding of the actions throughout the sequence and how they translate in terms of flow and individual beats to the narrative.

Taking a key influence from stereotypical western cinematography, I decided to stylise my approach in homage to this classic genre by using an array of iconic shots of understanding of rule of thirds to my advantage. Known for their dependant use of close-ups, this is something I replicated in my own work to build a significant amount of tension and really focus on the slow build ups critical to the sharp change in pace.

This theme continued with both of my characters entrance and leave of the scene as the box is shown as the primary focus until my character steps into view. Using this change in perspective and depth, it is a slow and sure fire way to build anticipation to the rising cause and effect of my animation. Another consideration of the tension that is significantly build up in this rendition in comparison to my first storyboard.

It was imperative that I was confident to keep my work rough and loose, to ensure for a quicker rendition of iterations and changes that could be discussed with peers. Expected at industry standard, over the course of the project I should continue to keep this constant speed of production but slowly but surely be able to refine my process in creating a narrative with significantly more clarity and purpose. With no focus on a polished result, the main intentions have to be clear enough to be able to tell what's going on within the story. 

Reflection

Not only being able a large array of work, I saw many benefits to having the opportunity to work a lot looser in this scenario. Giving me the opportunity to explore and expand my creative ideas. Exploding my original intentions will now allow me the chance to dial back and refine these experiments to a much more concise and clear outcome that reflects a more traditional ‘storyboard’. 

Having changed my idea from my original reference footage, between now and my next storyboard session with Helen, I would best benefit from taking the time to film and record a series of new footage reflecting the new direction I want to take my outcome. 

Taking into consideration the benefits of working with my peers in this situation, I would like to have the chance to once again record and reflect on not only my own but other interpretations of my idea, to gather a range of sources that may bring something new to the context of my work. I hope to have the opportunity to continue this post-it note exercise in the upcoming weeks to experiment with the looseness and expressive style of my character posing. 

To summarise;

I reflected on the opportunity to go beyond the expectations of the brief, expanding my idea to pursue new avenues.

Discussed with peers my new ideas, gaining feedback and criticism on how I can improve.

Considered how I can re-record reference footage to get a better understanding of timing and spacing throughout my work. 

I highlighted the importance of working loose to generate a range of ideas whilst keeping a consistent clarity to my narrative.

[lizziecounsellmediaposts-blog]

Technical Shoot

Long Shot – When using a long shot in filmography, the audience can see all of the focus of the shot, as well as much more of what is going on in the mis-en-scene. This often includes a full body shot (heads to toe) of a person, but without exposing too much of their surroundings, otherwise it would be classified as a further away shot. This emphasizes their appearance, without too much detail but a better overview of them. This enables the audience to have a good starting basis of the scene, where normally the camera would lead onto more specific close up shots of certain features in the scene. In terms of the usage of a long shot in my preliminary production, it will be frequent to introduce the work.

For any long shot, you should always be aware of good lighting. The shot normally has a lot going on in it (which explains a little more distance on the focus) that you can’t afford for something to go missed. Similarly, if there is too much going on, it is easy for someone to not concentrate on the fact you’re filming, or for standards to slip. The more happening in the shot, the more careful analysis of the shot needs to be taken into account.

  Medium Shot – A medium shot narrows the audience’s perspective, and has a more direct focus. This creates a little more of an intimate understanding with the shot/character, where less of the surrounding is seen. This emphasizes more of what they look like, how the hold themselves etc. This means the audience are more drawn in, whereas the shot narrows, they feel more of a direct connection with the focus, thus making the piece of film more appealing to watch. Similarly to a long shot, a medium shot will always be used throughout filming for a final product; it is a standard shot that has to take place for an audience to have a slight interest in.

  Close Up – The whole point in putting a close up in place is to close in further into a shot, where almost nothing can take the attention of the audience other than the main focus. This is to make sure that smaller more delicate details are picked up on from the main focus, to further build the up what the audience already knows of the main focus. This often is where an audience would be most interested with the shot, simply because it is such a near perspective. This adds to the idea that they will be less inclined to be disinterested or distracted by the work. 

Although, as a shot does become more narrowed, it is vital to make sure the least amount of unintentional shaking takes place. The camera is most likely going to be zoomed in therefore it can easily pick up any slight movement. It makes the standard of the work look less high, which can sometimes lead to an audience losing interest they have.

  Extreme Close Up – This is the upmost intimacy that the audience can have with the focus of the shot, where all minuscule details are noted. This obviously leads to the peak in the viewer’s interest, where the shot is normal tense or trying to really connect the audience with the small features. I would ensure to use this sort of shot in my preliminary production to contrast any long shot I have as well as changing up the standard long or medium shot that a vast majority of filmography. It’s simple but effective!

Although, the clarity of the shot has to be far more intense and accurate. There would be no point in trying to connect the audience with a really zoomed shot, when in actual fact there is nothing detailed for them to be drawn in to notice. 

  High Angle – The use of a high angle exaggerates the size of the main focus, where the audience then gain an omniscient perspective of the character. This can often then suggest their status or reaction to what else can be seen in the mis-en-scene. If I was to use this in my preliminary production, I would make sure that the angle has proper height on it, to introduce to the setting to my audience. The only potential issue that could come from trying to achieve a realistic image from this shot would the shot could be difficult to get good height on, let alone trying to put any movement with the shot at such a height.

  Straight Angle – A straight angle is frequently used throughout filmography, where the perspective we see of the focus is direct and to the point, with no alterations of the angle the camera is held. This tells the audience that what they can see is obvious or should be closely examined. This often leads to the audience taking in information about the character in a much clearer way. In terms of my preliminary production, I’m sure I will be using this angle very frequently as I think it is a basic but effective view of what we can see is going on throughout the shot.

  Low Angle – When using a low angle to emphasize the focus of the shot, the subject of what we can see in the shot is seen as ‘higher up’. This can further be suggestive of the status of the character, where they have more power than the audience or even as someone else in the shot also. It works as an opposite to a high angle where the main focus seems small and in a large space; we as the audience are now feeling looked down upon, feeling smaller. I’d only think of using low angle in my final piece if there was more than one character present, where I could make a definitive difference between two people status wise. Although, I do also think that the use of low angle sometimes expresses the tension of a shot, by making the setting look bigger and more intense to overcome, in which the character is place right in the middle of.

  Canted Angle – I’ve always thought a canted angle suggests a broken or scary scene. Having the camera at such an angle implies that something isn’t okay because it’s not very common to have the camera at an angle. It’s not very common to see in film, which as the story might go, it’s not common for the character to feel scared or broken either; it’s all about trying to relate the camera to the character, to therefore make the audience relate to the characters emotions. Depending on what I am planning on basing my preliminary piece on, this could potentially be used although it might not necessarily suit the style of what I go for.

  Tracking – Tracking creates the effect being very close to a character, almost is a stalking way to really get to grip with who they are and how they carry themselves, as well as the way that other people react to their presence.

  Panning - Panning is a simple way in which to show your audience the setting and what is involved in the shot. Often, the shot doesn't focus in on something specific in a pan, but more of generalised overview of the setting. The only issue we were faced with whilst trying to film was maintaining focus for all of those who were in the shot, trying to make them resist the urge to face towards the camera, although it clearly wasn't as easy as that. <

  Crabbing – When filming a crabbing movement, you have to maintain the same level throughout as well as make sure it’s smooth and well executed, similar to a pan. This particular movement is done to make the audience have a sense of watching them from sideways on, in one sense as if you’re peering in on the scenario they’re in. It, yet again, is a type of way that the audience can further build up an intimate connection with the focus.

  Tilting Up/ Down – This gradual reveal of the main focus works in the same way as a low angle but as the audience, it feels more as though the focus is actually looking down on us, as if we were smaller or of a lower status. Similarly, a tilt down is more of a showing off of the focus rather than representing a higher status. When they are done at a slower pace, it is meant to make the audience really observe details.

  Craning- This shot is a birds eye view to begin with that eventually leads up and out onto a new perspective by either turning the camera to a view. This enables the perspective to be broadened for the audience, where they see the 'bigger picture'.

  Crash Zoom In/Out - A crash zoom is almost a more comical zoom, where the audience are given a very sudden change or view of the main focus, to a far more precise. The only issue that we were faced with when trying to pull this off was making sure that the focus of the camera remained once zoomed in accurately.

  Zoom In/Out - A zoom slowly broadens or narrows the audience’s perspective of the shot, where it is clear that the focus is shifting. The audience are meant to learn more or less about the scenario. I think that this will be used frequently in my preliminary film; it is a simple camera movement that establishes a lot about the narrative for the audience.

  Overall, the whole technical shoot helped me boost my understanding of camera movements and the way in which the camera works for filming. It was a starting point for a new A Level Media Studies student, where I managed to pick up a tonne of skills that are perfect for the area of the course I am most exciting to explore.

[phynxrizng]

DAILT ASTROLOGY REPORTS AND HOROSCOPES FOR 5-16-17

ASTROLOGY TOOLS FREE NATAL CHART REPORT ABOUT CONTACT Astrology Cafe Daily Astrology

DAILY ASTROLOGY TODAY MONTHLY Astrology of Today – Tuesday, May 16, 2017

May 15, 2017 by ANNIE LEAVE A COMMENT



The Moon is in Capricorn until 1:49 PM, after which the Moon is in Aquarius. The Moon is void from 6:22 AM to 1:49 PM. The Moon is waning and in its Waning Gibbous phase. The Full Moon occurred on the 10th in the sign of Scorpio, and the Last Quarter Moon will occur on May 18th. Mercury is direct and in its post-retrograde shadow until May 20th. Venus is in its post-retrograde shadow until May 18th. Mercury enters Taurus today (Mercury is in Taurus May 16-June 6). Times are EDT. Horoscopes Aries



Mercury enters your finances sector today, dear Aries, where it will stay until June 6th. Mercury spent the first three weeks of April in this sector but then turned retrograde. Going forward, you approach your finances from a new, refreshed perspective. This is a good time for padding your income through communications, networking, sharing, and word of mouth for some of you. It’s one of the best periods of the year for money-making ideas. It’s also a good time for getting down to brass tacks when it comes to planning and dealing with your practical affairs. Even so, with the Sun in the same sector in an awkward angle to Saturn today, things are not as clear as you’d like. Making adjustments and edits is important now. Decisions should wait until you’ve processed everything, as right now, details can come to your attention that were previously overlooked.

Taurus

Mercury enters your sign today, dear Taurus, and will transit Taurus until June 6th. Mercury was in your sign for the first three weeks of April, but then it turned retrograde and retreated into your privacy sector, and you had some mulling over, processing, and thinking twice to do. Going forward, you’re in a great position to express yourself, make clearer decisions, and delight others with your communications. You’ll feel a nice burst of mental energy now and projects that didn’t gain momentum last month now move forward. Today, however, you can have a difficult time pushing much of anything forward. Others may be standing in your way, or you could need just a little more time to figure things out. Blocks today can take the form of disapproval from others or internalized guilt about whether you’ve handled your responsibilities. The need to make adjustments to your plans can be annoying after some free sailing days, but with patience, they can work very much in your favor in the long run.

Gemini



Mercury moves into your privacy sector today, dear Gemini, and will influence this house of your solar chart until June 6th. This Mercury cycle is a natural period for reviewing projects, working behind the scenes, and enjoying a break from overthinking. You’ll be looking at life a little differently and picking up information that you’ve missed in the past, perhaps because you were too busy to notice. From June 6th forward, you’ll be in a clearer state of mind for making quick decisions and beginning new projects with Mercury in your sign, but for now, you’ll do yourself good by taking the time to think things through. Wrapping up projects can figure strongly now. Today, responsibilities to others or dealing with disapproval can pull you out of your comfort zone. As much as you’d prefer to escape or keep to yourself, others may not be very sensitive to this need. It may be best to fill your duties and get them out of the way so that you can spend more guilt-free time doing what you want to do.

Cancer



Mercury moves into your social sector today, dear Cancer, after a stay in the first three weeks of April and then a retrograde back-up. Now that the planet of communication is back, you’ll be in a strong position for networking, gaining forward momentum in pursuits you started last month, and finding the right information you need for moving new initiatives forward. This cycle continues until June 6th and encourages an easier rapport with associates, friends, and networks. It’s also a strong period for innovative and enterprising thinking. Today, however, as much as you want to catch up with others and apply your energies to exciting projects, responsibilities call. There may be a small setback related to work or health that delays your plans a smidge, but that needs attention before moving forward. Consider that just for today and tomorrow, timing can be a little off, so aim to make adjustments and edits rather than force something that’s just not ready to budge.

Leo



Mercury moves back to the top of your solar chart today, dear Leo, where it transited from March 31-April 20, but then retreated due to a retrograde cycle. Going forward, you’re in a great position to share your ideas with others, particularly in public or professional settings, gain momentum for ideas and plans that may have delayed last month, and fill in the details for long-term goals and plans during this cycle that lasts until June 6th. Today, however, a Sun-Saturn aspect can point to a dilemma or delay that feels like a setback but may very well work in your favor in the long run. Your focus on a creative project or love relationship can seem to interfere with professional pursuits, or a personal matter interferes with your work or plans. Watch for working too hard or taking on more responsibilities than you can handle today but do attend to your duties to the best of your abilities so that you can free up your time for loftier goals.

Virgo

Your ruler, Mercury, moves into harmony with your sign and your spirit sector today, dear Virgo. This transit occurred but didn’t complete in April due to a retrograde backup. However, now and until June 6th, you’ll be in particularly good shape for thinking in broad terms, expanding your mind and your interests, and sharing your ideas and beliefs with enthusiasm. You’re seeking to understand more about your life and the world around you now. Studies or topics of interest that you may have put on the shelf last month now move forward. This is a wonderful cycle for an optimistic frame of mind. Today, however, there can be some uncertainty or hesitancy to deal with as the Sun in your adventure sector competes with Saturn in your home and family sector. You can feel torn between pursuing your interests or embracing change and sticking with what you know and what’s familiar. For some, a domestic responsibility keeps you from enjoying the escape you crave. Some see-sawing between worry and hopefulness is possible as you adjust to new information before moving forward.

Libra



Mercury now transits your solar eighth house, dear Libra, after a stay here from March 31-April 20 and then a retrograde backup. Until June 6th, you’re craving more involvement or passionate interest in your projects, studies, conversations, and thoughts. This cycle is strong for consultations, research, and analysis. You’re likely to make some useful discoveries about others’ motivations and your inner workings. You can make sense of what’s going on by reading between the lines. Today, there can be some hesitancy as the Sun in your intimacy sector clashes with Saturn in your communications sector. As much as you’d like to explore deeper interests and pour yourself into a relationship or project, you have many obligations that prevent you from doing so. You might crave a conversation about something personal, but you end having a tough time letting the walls down and expressing yourself so intimately.

Scorpio



Mercury spent the first three weeks of April in your partnership sector and then retreated due to its retrograde, dear Scorpio. Now, Mercury returns to this sector and will influence it until June 6th. Conversations that were left unfinished may now resume, or information you sought but eluded you last month may now emerge. This can be a wonderful time for opening the airwaves with a partner, significant other, or a good friend. People in your life can help you get in better touch with your ideas as conversations with them jumpstart your thinking processes. Today, however, there can be some tendency to swing between wanting to share with others and keep to yourself. As well, a delay or responsibility can slow you down socially. Try to use this short block as a chance to catch your breath. If a plan or pursuit needs refreshing or editing, this is a good time to do so.

Sagittarius



Mercury is now transiting your sector of work and health, dear Sagittarius, and will continue to influence this area of your solar chart until June 6th. Mercury spent time here in the first three weeks of April but then backtracked due to a retrograde cycle. As such, plans or projects begun last month that were delayed by missing information might start moving forward or gaining momentum in the coming weeks. While this cycle is not necessarily the best for smooth flow of communication, it’s healthy for attention to details. Even so, you’ll need to get over a hump now before throwing yourself into your work, fitness, or health regimens wholeheartedly due to the Sun and Saturn in an awkward angle to one another. Responsibilities, feeling demotivated, delays, or physical complaints may interfere with the progress you want to make. Plans built on unstable foundations may reveal themselves now, and while this can be disappointing, you’ll be better off strengthening things before pushing ahead.

Capricorn



Mercury now moves back into your creative and playful solar fifth house today, dear Capricorn, and will journey through it until June 6th. While Mercury was in this sector from March 31-April 20, it wasn’t able to complete its transit due to a retrograde backtracking. In the coming weeks, you’ll be in a good position to move fun projects and pursuits forward. You’ll have more confidence sharing your ideas and thoughts with others, and you may very well stand out for your unique viewpoint or intelligence. Even so, today’s Sun-Saturn challenge can find you hesitant or reticent before confidence returns. Alternatively, delays or responsibilities to others can interfere with your pursuits, and you’ll need to attend to your obligations before you get the chance to enjoy your plans wholeheartedly. There can be some matters to handle from the past that need your attention or feelings of guilt and unrest to deal with before you feel carefree enough to express yourself with enthusiasm.

Aquarius



Mercury moves into your sector of home and family today, dear Aquarius, and will continue to influence this part of your solar chart until June 6th. Mercury spent some time here in April but then backed up due to a retrograde and didn’t have a chance to complete its transit. Going forward, you’ll get the opportunity to resume conversations and projects or plans with family and those related to house and home. Projects might gain momentum now. It’s an excellent time for doing some deep thinking and remembering old methods that worked for you. Today, though, you can feel a little torn between duties to friends or the outside world and your desire to stick close to home, whether this is literal or figurative! While there can be blocks, delays, or bumps and bruises in your relationships, these are minor and just require a redirection or reboot. Make adjustments before pushing forward and feel stronger for doing so.

Pisces



Mercury moves into your sector of communication, dear Pisces, where it feels right at home — after all, Mercury rules communications. This points to a natural flow of learning, connecting, and communicating in this cycle that lasts until June 6th. Mercury spent time here from March 31-April 20, but then backtracked when it turned retrograde. Now and going forward, projects you left unfinished may resume, information that you needed to move forward arrives, and you have more time to explore personal interests that you toyed with last month. Even so, with two awkward aspects in the mix today and tomorrow, you’ll need to make some adjustments before moving forward with full confidence. There can be delays or the consequences of poor planning in the past to deal with now. Responsibilities can loom now, and while delays can be annoying, you’ll feel much better if you can get your obligations out of the way.

*Remember to read horoscopes for your Ascendant sign and Sun sign. If you don’t know your Ascendant sign and know your birth time, you can look it up here.

If Your Birthday is May 16th, If Today is Your Birthday full horoscope here.

Astrology of Today – The Details: If you’re astrologically inclined and interested in the details of the Astrology of today, here are some of the factors considered in the forecasts (for the astrology of the week, see This Week in Astrology):







Date & Time: 16 May 2017 1:49 pm Event: Moon enters Aquarius Description: The Moon in Aquarius This is generally a good time for social pursuits, group projects, trying something new, joining a group, and networking. A change of pace refreshes. Hobbies, clubs, and groups may demand attention now. It is time to build networks and cooperate. Humanitarian pursuits are highlighted.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 6:22 am Event: Moon goes void of course

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 5:16 am Event: Tr-Tr Mon Tri Sun Description: Transiting Moon Trine Transiting Sun There is a nice feeling of harmony and a cooperative feel to this time. Better decision making. We represent ourselves well now. It’s easier to attract support, favorable responses, and positive experiences. We are less fearful and less defensive. This is a harmonious time.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 6:22 am Event: Tr-Tr Mon Sqr Ura Description: Transiting Moon Square Transiting Uranus There may be sudden, minor changes to plans, schedules. There can be rebelliousness and tension. Aim to be open to possibilities, and avoid making permanent decisions.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 9:48 am Event: Tr-Tr Mon Sxt Chi Description: Transiting Moon Sextile Transiting Chiron We are more emotionally present and involved. We more easily hone in on problem areas and want to fix them. Synchronicity is a feature of our daily life right now. Tune in and enjoy the spiritual signposts.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 11:25 am Event: Tr-Tr Mon Qnx Nod Description: Transiting Moon Quincunx Transiting North Node There may be the need to pause to adjust things before moving plans forward. We could feel at odds with others on an emotional level. Public relations are not as favorable now.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 11:51 am Event: Tr-Tr Mon SSq Nep Description: Transiting Moon SemiSquare Transiting Neptune If we are not in touch with our need for inspiration, beauty, compassion, connection to something otherworldly, or our spirituality, we could feel out of sorts right now. Relaxing, listening to music, getting close to nature, or taking a break may resolve this.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 1:49 pm Event: Tr-Tr Mon Cnj Aqu Description: Transiting Moon Entering Aquarius This is generally a good time for social pursuits, group projects, trying something new, joining a group, and networking. A change of pace refreshes. Hobbies, clubs, and groups may demand attention now. It is time to build networks and cooperate. Humanitarian pursuits are highlighted.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 2:54 pm Event: Tr-Tr Mon Sqr Mer Description: Transiting Moon Square Transiting Mercury We may not be communicating with sensitivity. What we communicate could misrepresent what we truly feel. There could be troubles with mechanics, computers, transportation, and miscommunications. We may not be understanding one another. We can be a little fickle and not especially objective. Think before you speak. Otherwise misunderstandings are likely to occur. Count to ten if you’re feeling annoyed.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 6:39 pm Event: Tr-Tr Mon Sqq Mar Description: Transiting Moon SesquiSquare Transiting Mars We can overreact and exhibit impatience. However, this can also be a time of self-motivation.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 11:00 pm Event: Tr-Tr Mon Opp Ves Description: Transiting Moon Opposition Transiting Vesta We can be a little stiff with our emotions, and we can be distracted from our work or focus. There can be difficulty expressing tenderness, concern, or care.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 0:06 am Event: Tr-Tr Mer Cnj Tau Description: Transiting Mercury Entering Taurus Time to pursue traditional knowledge. Learn from your elders and other wise counsel. Make solid plans. Sign contracts.

Date & Time: 16 May 2017 11:29 am Event: Tr-Tr Mar Pll Ves Description: Transiting Mars Parallel Transiting Vesta

Strong Signs, Elements, Modes ARIES STRONG Initiating, pioneering energy. Independent, bold, courageous, assertive, fiery, inspirational, direct, decisive. Can be egotistical, impulsive, impatient, aggressive, lacking subtlety. TAURUS STRONG Stable and enduring, strong values, unyielding, earthy, acquisitive, strong desires. Can be stuck, stubborn, overly possessive, self-indulgent. CAPRICORN STRONG Disciplined, responsible, reliable, industrious, conscientious, practical, achieving. Can be pessimistic, overly conventional, rigid, materialistic, callous.

BALANCE OF ELEMENTS

EARTH STRONG We are especially in touch with the physical world. We consider what we’ve learned and experienced in the past in order to make the most of the present. We can be cautious, practical, and possibly unimaginative. We are deliberate and can pace ourselves well. We need hands-on experience and are not impressed with theory as much as we are with results. Routines are tolerable and comforting. WATER WEAK There may be some insensitivity or lack of empathy now. We may be out of touch with what we’re feeling or with our emotional needs. We may be tougher than usual now, and more inclined to follow mental or practical considerations than we are to listen to our intuition.

BALANCE OF MODES

The modes are balanced.

LUNAR PHASE: DISSEMINATING Moon 135 to 90 degrees behind the Sun. Sharing our knowledge with the world is a major motivation at this stage. We believe we have gained much knowledge and wisdom through our experiences, and want to ensure others have the benefit as well.

The following aspects (major only) and positions are at noon (EDT) on May 16th: Note that when an aspect is applying, it has not yet happened but is within orb – it’s pending. When an aspect is separating, it has already happened/perfected and is moving away from the aspect. Depending on the speed of the planet/body involved, the aspect will have perfected, or will perfect, in a matter of hours (often the case with the Moon), days, months, and possibly years in the case of the very slow-moving outer planets and bodies.

Note that the Moon moves at a rate of approximately one degree every 2 hours, so that if an aspect involving the Moon is applying and has an orb of 5 degrees, the aspect will perfect (be exact) in about 10 hours. If the Moon is separating from an aspect with an orb of 2 degrees, it has already formed said aspect approximately 4 hours ago (since the following are positions at noon today, then it would have occurred at about 8 AM today).

**I suggest paying close attention to applying  aspects. The energy of the aspect builds as it gets closer to exact. Once an aspect involving inner planets has happened, it’s over.  Separating aspects are good to know for context, but in terms of energy that is with us today, applying aspects are most important. (This is the case for daily astrology influences involving inner planets, which pass quickly, and not natal astrology aspects, which are with us for a lifetime).

THE MOON

THE MOON IN CAPRICORN You feel secure when life is structured, or you are working hard. You may be emotionally distant or cold. You mother’s love may be limited in some way. Your mother may have been strict or cold.

30TH DEGREE OF CAPRICORN Part of Body: Adductor muscle Sabian Symbol: Directors of a large firm meet in secret conference.

ASPECTS OF THE MOON TRINE THE SUN Orb 3°06′ Separating We are supportive, cooperative, open, genuine, and more relaxed than usual.

SQUARE MERCURY Orb 1°21′ Applying It’s difficult to make decisions now as emotional needs and wants tend to conflict with what we feel are the most logical choices. Judgment may be skewed by emotions or personal bias.

SQUARE URANUS Orb 2°49′ Separating There may be sudden, minor changes to plans, schedules. There can be rebelliousness and tension. Aim to be open to possibilities, and avoid making permanent decisions.

SEXTILE CHIRON Orb 1°05′ Separating There can be new or easy understanding of our feelings and impressions now. We have a greater understanding of, or compassion for, others’ problems. We are more emotionally present and involved.

THE SUN

THE SUN IN TAURUS You are a reliable and solid individual. You have a strong need for stable routine and security. You can be stubborn. Others can rely on your down-to-earth nature.

26TH DEGREE OF TAURUS Part of Body: Nasal bone Sabian Symbol: A spaniard serenading his senorita.

ASPECTS OF THE SUN QUINCUNX SATURN Orb 0°34′ Applying We can become aware of responsibilities or time limitations now that can hold us back from spontaneous, direct choices and actions. Results are delayed, and we need to be patient. This is a time for slowing down in order to make adjustments and edits to our plans.

TRINE PLUTO Orb 6°43′ Separating You are a powerful person with strong leadership abilities. You know when to be assertive and when to compromise. You are able to apply yourself to the job at hand.

SEXTILE CHIRON Orb 2°00′ Applying You will be able to help others with your ability to understand their pain.

MERCURY

MERCURY IN TAURUS You place importance on traditional knowledge. You learn in a slow, methodical and hands-on manner. You stick to old ideas and may fear having to learn anything new.

1ST DEGREE OF TAURUS Part of Body: Throat, gullet Sabian Symbol: A clear mountain stream.

ASPECTS OF MERCURY TRINE SATURN Orb 3°53′ Separating We are cautious, careful, tuned in to details, and rely on common sense at this time.

CONJUNCTION URANUS Orb 4°10′ Separating You have an incisive and ingenious mind. Your thoughts and speech are erratic and inventive. You enjoy progressive topics. Your opinions may be ahead of your time.

VENUS

VENUS IN ARIES You will pursue a partner ardently and hastily, and yet strive for freedom and independence, once you are in an intimate relationship. You like to be the initiator in relationships, and can be aggressive. You may be a spendthrift.

12TH DEGREE OF ARIES Part of Body: Tongue Sabian Symbol: A flock of wild geese.

ASPECTS OF VENUS OPPOSITION JUPITER Orb 2°33′ Applying You are a social climber. You grapple with extravagance, wastefulness and a child-like expectancy that someone will come to your rescue. Your conflict is that you have become dependent on other people and have forgotten how to stand on your own. The lesson is moderation.

MARS

MARS IN GEMINI You like to initiate ideas and spread information. You are assertive, although you can resort to evasive behaviour.

18TH DEGREE OF GEMINI Part of Body: Second rib Sabian Symbol: Two chinese men talking chinese (in a western crowd).

ASPECTS OF MARS TRINE JUPITER Orb 3°11′ Separating You are enthusiastic with an endless source of energy. You could direct your energy to achievement in sports, politics or travel.

SQUARE NEPTUNE Orb 3°14′ Separating This is a time for resting, escaping, or taking a break as we reconsider our needs. We might temporarily lose focus or direction.

QUINCUNX PLUTO Orb 1°58′ Applying Resentment, competitive feelings, or anger may be operating just under the surface, and it can be difficult to know why, or to find satisfying ways to manage it.

JUPITER

JUPITER IN LIBRA You have a strong concern for justice. You are a diplomatic teacher, and express your spiritual values in your relationships.

15TH DEGREE OF LIBRA Part of Body: Right inguinal lymph nodes Sabian Symbol: Circular paths.

ASPECTS OF JUPITER QUINCUNX NEPTUNE Orb 0°03′ Applying You feel a call to serve others perhaps through a profession or through religion. You will need to learn what is reasonable to do for others, and what is over stepping the boundary of your responsibility.

SATURN

SATURN IN SAGITTARIUS Saturn in Sagittarius asks us to take on the responsibility of living according to our personal truths and principles, and to be loyal to these. This is a time for turning a critical eye to those beliefs and principles that don’t accurately reflect our authentic selves. (December 23, 2014 to June 14, 2015, then September 17, 2015 to December 20, 2017)

27TH DEGREE OF SAGITTARIUS Part of Body: Gluteal muscles Sabian Symbol: The sculptor’s vision is taking form.

ASPECTS OF SATURN TRINE URANUS Orb 0°17′ Applying You have a talent for investigation. You look at new ideas and are able then to put them into action. In business you achieve much in your own independent way.

SQUARE CHIRON Orb 1°26′ Separating There can be fears now of not being competent or effective enough to meet our responsibilities, or we could find it hard to strike out on a unique path, again due to fears or insecurities. The desire to break from the status quo is strong, but we may not have the necessary confidence to do so. We may have difficulties empathizing with others and understanding ourselves.

URANUS

URANUS IN ARIES The urge to start fresh, to break free from restrictive attitudes or circumstances, to totally redesign an area of our lives (or even our personalities), and to gain freedom through independence is strong during this cycle. (May 27, 2010 to August 13, 2010, then March 11th, 2011 to May 15, 2018, then November 6, 2018 to March 6, 2019).

27TH DEGREE OF ARIES Part of Body: Fornix/frontal bone Sabian Symbol: Through imagination, a lost opportunity is regained.

NEPTUNE

NEPTUNE IN PISCES A long-term influence in which fantasy, imagination, compassion, and spirituality are in stronger focus. (April 4, 2011 to August 4, 2011, then February 3, 2012 to March 30, 2025, then October 22, 2025 to January 26, 2026)

15TH DEGREE OF PISCES Part of Body: Left cutaneous veins Sabian Symbol: An officer preparing to drill his men.

PLUTO

PLUTO IN CAPRICORN Tests of our boundaries; breaking down and rebuilding structures and rules. (From January 25, 2008, to June 14, 2008, then November 26, 2008, to March 23, 2023, then June 11, 2023, to January 20, 2024, then September 1, 2024, to November 19, 2024).

20TH DEGREE OF CAPRICORN Part of Body: Tendons of right knee Sabian Symbol: A hidden choir singing.

Chiron, Major Asteroids, and Moon’s Nodes: in Sign and in Aspect CHIRON

CHIRON IN PISCES

Strong awareness of our own vulnerabilities and humanity stimulates compassion for others. (April 20 to July 20, 2010, then February 8, 2011, to April 17, 2018, then September 25, 2018, to February 18, 2019).

28TH DEGREE OF PISCES Part of Body: Phalanges of left foot Sabian Symbol: A fertile garden under the full moon.

VESTA

VESTA IN LEO You work most creatively when left to your own devices. You feel pride in your work and can be inspired by romance and fun. Play and work are closely linked for you.

5TH DEGREE OF LEO Part of Body: Right carotid artery Sabian Symbol: Rock formations at the edge of a precipice.

PALLAS

PALLAS IN ARIES You have a keen intellect with the ability to come up with exciting, new ideas. You are also happy to risk putting your new ideas into action.

17TH DEGREE OF ARIES Part of Body: Vertebral canal Sabian Symbol: Two prim spinsters sitting together in silence.

JUNO

JUNO IN CAPRICORN You want a partner who you can respect, and who respects you. You seek long-term commitment and may marry later in life.

19TH DEGREE OF CAPRICORN Part of Body: Ligaments of left knee Sabian Symbol: A child of about five with a huge shopping bag.

CERES

CERES IN GEMINI You like those close to you to share their feelings and thoughts and to listen to you. You share information with your loved ones to show them you care. You will suffer when others refuse to talk.

7TH DEGREE OF GEMINI Part of Body: Apex of lungs Sabian Symbol: An old-fashioned well.

THE NORTH NODE

THE NORTH NODE IN LEO This a quest to develop your inner strength. You may find that you experience times of loneliness. These times are part of your lesson to forge your own creative life in order to give generously to the world.

29TH DEGREE OF LEO Part of Body: Atrioventricular septum Sabian Symbol: A mermaid emerges from the ocean.

THE SOUTH NODE

THE SOUTH NODE IN AQUARIUS This a quest to develop your inner strength. You may find that you experience times of loneliness. These times are part of your lesson to forge your own creative life in order to give generously to the world.

29TH DEGREE OF AQUARIUS Part of Body: Left tibia Sabian Symbol: Butterfly emerging from a chrysalis.

*** CONJUNCTIONS TO SELECT FIXED STARS ***

Transits 16 May 2017 – Event Chart

Aspects to Sun 25°Ta58 +19°14′ Cnj 26°Ta24 ALGOL— Female passion and intensity.

Aspects to Mer 00°Ta26 +08°29′ Cnj 00°Ta38 MIRACH In harmony to be receptive

Aspects to Mar 17°Ge15 +23°35′ Cnj 17°Ge03 RIGEL ** To bring knowledge to others.

Aspects to Sat 26°Sg32 -22°01′ Cnj 25°Sg58 ACULEUS Enduring attacks but success

Aspects to BMo 10°Sg16 -16°59′ Cnj 10°Sg00 ANTARES *** Success which can be obsessive



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