#and have everyone around u being like ''THATS JUST MEN LOL''

[nightcolorz]

I must confess something, I do not understand white Vox lol is it just his VA? He may be just a TV with a body but his eyes seem to be drawn as east asian and thats his most prominent human feature. Majority of the time I see people draw him as a human they actually erase his real eye shape to (I assume) make him look more white. There's no real canon so people can hc whatever but I am so intrigued by how people are interpreting him white. I promise there are nasty tech/media ceos that overwork their employees all over the world... maybe im reading too much into it because the show is otherwise verrrry western-centric. Just curious how you view it, you're definitely in the majority and i realize people like me are the outliers but just saw your post and had to ask (if you didnt mind sharing).

Anon is referring to this post btw for context: https://www.tumblr.com/nightcolorz/746235899544813568/my-hot-take-is-that-i-think-that-a-vox-human?source=share

Anon ur hella polite and ik u got good intentions so I was stressing a little over how to respond without invalidating ur headcanon cuz like, I never want to be the guy saying “this character is white and u can’t headcanon them as a racial minority” cuz that’s pretty shitty no matter what. We definitely have different takes but when I’m explaining my interpretation I don’t wanna sound like I’m trying to boss ppl around and say there’s only one way u can see these characters. This is just my personal interpretation and I was being funny in my og post implying that my interpretation is the “correct” way. But since u asked I’ll explain my reasoning why I (and prob other ppl) see Vox as extremely white lol.

I don’t take Vox’s physical appearance into account at all when thinking about his ethnicity cuz in a show were everyone is pretty racially ambiguous design wise Vox is one of the most ambiguously humanoid characters, like my guy literally has a tv for a head with eyes and a mouth, and that’s it. I don’t see ur point about his eyes at all tbh, to me Vox’s vaguely slanted eyes have always come off more like a devious squint than an ethnic feature. Even still I don’t read slanted eyes as Asian automatically so it never occurred to me.

I don’t read as Vox as white bcus of his VA being white or him being a tech bro billionaire (but ig they play a part). I read Vox as white mostly bcus I see his background as a former religious extremist/cult leader from the 50s with a skill in life and in death for male manipulating ppl and using them for his own gain as very white and western. (I got this info from his official reference sheet for auditioning va’s, here that is)

His capitalistic ideals and business practices r meant to mirror (extremely white) billionaires like Musk and Bezos, which adds to my perception of him. Of course being a billionaire tech guy is not a western white man exclusive thing, but I feel that if we were meant to perceive Vox as someone not from America that would definitely be coded or in some way communicated. And I say this with as little ill will as possible, but for me I wouldn’t want to perceive Vox as an East Asian tech bro billionaire specifically bcus there r negative stereotypes and connotations attached there. East Asian men have a history of being negatively stereotyped as corrupt tech business owners. I don’t think u are trying to imply those stereotypes with ur head canon (frankly it’s hard to avoid negative stereotypes in fiction a lot of the time bcus stereotypes encompass such a vast range of things that its hard to take them all into account). But regardless, it’s smth we should try to be conscious of.

Anyways, I also usually take these character’s personalities and values, self image, etc into account when im thinking about race, bcus race is more then color, and especially for characters with lives and personalities based in much less tolerant time periods, it’s significant to consider how race would play a role in forming the way they navigate the world. Based on how Vox behaves I can’t see him as being racially marginalized. I’m gonna compare Vox to alastor a little cuz alastor is canonically creole and I think he serves as a good reference for someone I perceive as not white in comparison to Vox and how I think he differs and contradicts the experiences of a racial minority.

Vox to me comes off as someone who thinks he is entitled to power, respect, privilege, etc, which is a very standard type of attitude for a white man who was alive in the 1950s to have. He’s very emotionally immature and volatile, doesn’t seem to concern much over his public image beyond petty dick measuring contests with alastor (he regularly publicly has angry tantrums and doesn’t break a sweat over how this will affect his status). He obviously cares about it (scolding Valentino for embarrassing him and such) but he doesn’t seem to worry about loss of reputation in any sort of real way. I get the impression that Vox has always had at least a standard amount of social standing and privilege and can’t see a life for himself without the fundamental privilege he feels owed there to support him. He’s basically a man baby, a man baby who still manages to garner power and respect effortlessly (it comes naturally to him) while remaining whiny and insecure. Very white man of him! White man behavior!

in comparison, Alastor, (who I do not read as white) is always frantically clinging to his composed self image and his power as if it will slip away from him if he loosens his grasp at all. He has an extremely firm grip on his composure to the point where he never allows anyone to see him slip at all, let alone frown (despite his mental health and emotional well being being equally fragile as Vox’s). Alastor understands deeply how little the world owes him and how difficult and unreliable his acquiring of status actually is. He is borderline neurotic about retaining his power and staying on top. Despite the smile, Alastor is always defensive and fearful, picking fights with anyone he thinks might be a threat like a small dog or a prey animal would. Meanwhile, Vox conducts himself like a man with nothing to loose. I feel like Vox grew up with money and doesn’t know poverty or a lack of privilege in any intimate way that would drive him to guard it in anyway beyond flippant. To Vox power, status, and privilege are inherent. Same can’t be said for alastor.

tldr in conclusion Vox’s brand of bad feels very specific to a white man, alongside his emotional immaturity and his attitude, mindset, and behavior. This is why I see him as white asf, but I don’t think there’s anything wrong or it’s in anyway less correct to headcanon him as a different race. That’s just how I see him. Thank u for sending the ask anon it was pretty interesting to write! Have a good day! (btw i love Vox he’s one of my fav character lol me calling him a white as shit privileged entitled man baby douchebag is out of love and all I find interesting and fun about him)

[misterradio]

okay here are some tron 2.0 thoughts TEE HEE....... you have been Spoiler Warned for REAL!

tron fans talk abt this game with me okay 🥺

THIS GAME IS BEAUTIFUL .... MWWWWWAH!!!!!! i just love all the different environment designs, the color coding that went into the different computer systems was really cool too. my main takeaway is that the visuals Rule.

the npc designs were cool too but i kind of wish there was More variety (visually as well as voice acting)... but i really enjoy the design direction here ::-) why so many bald antagonist though? lol (AND WHY SO MANY MEN?)

In regards to gameplay i felt like it was pretty standard? i ended up using the basic disc weapon for most of the game because switching weapons takes Way too long if youre actively fighting, which is kind of a shame cuz there are so many weapon options... i did really enjoy the energy claw though 👍also the light cycle racing SUCKED and there was a graphical glitch that made it so that a bunch of visuals to my cycle were missing so i couldnt even enjoy the new design that was hyped up lol. as complicated as gameplay felt up front it definitely felt much better as it went on so it was pretty good.

game progression was very straightforward which i didnt expect..? go do this and then do that, etc. i thought it would be more open. this isnt rlly a complaint bc at least i wasnt lost or anything.

finding all the build notes was thankfully not hard but i enjoy poking around as much as i can in games already... and i liked the mechanics of searching archive boxes and being able to read emails between people ::-) YAY NOSINESS !!! despite finding all the build notes i still didnt end with the highest version i couldve...🤔 no idea how that works then...

moving on 2 story...

all the characters felt a bit flat so that was unfortunate... i wouldve liked to see some more emotions from everyone, bit more personality, etc...

i dont rlly know where jet's attachment to mercury came from, is he in love with this girl, if so why?? im thinking that since she was the first program to really reach out and help jet, that he latched on to her. but as the player i was kind of neutral on her SORRY although her design is cool

i was in disbelief that lora died and i was thinking she would just have been digitized and b in the computer somewhere? and there are allusions to her at least being superficially present in the program ma3a/ma2a etc (they have the same actress ^^__^^) but neither jet nor alan mention this which really shocks me??!!!??? thats your deceased mom or wife can u show a bit of tenderness or something..... maybe this can be cooked up more in an AU or something . idk i was really hoping she (and yori) would be around. i held on to hope for so long ✊️

OBVIOUSLY WISHING TRON WAS THERE... but omg alan being in the digital world shocked me so much i really liked that HEHE. him wearing tron's outfit was fun. i saw someone else in the tag say this, but if tron is "retired" then where is he?? INQUIRING MINDS WANNA KNOW !! he and jet werent very fazed by being digitized which surprised me buuut they also have to adapt fast given the urgency of their situation..

i felt rlly bad that thorne died SNIFFLE SNIFFLE jet and alan just watched a real guy die in front of them thats MESSED UP!! he was really cool too i enjoyed the corruption concept ::-) i was really worried the three fcon employees were gonna die too but im glad they implied that they could be repaired and manifested again.. (what is the word for un-digitized..?)

evil ma3a was really cool 👍 tbh all the antagonists are cool except im neutral on the kernel. i was confused that he was red i thought he was evil like in the original movie with the MCP's soldiers.. but i think hes just a guy who happens to be red. and also trying to kill u but just bc you (jet) are a freak of computer nature and should not be there. thats fair. i enjoyed his boss fight too.

THE FCON MONSTER WAS RLLY COOL HOW AM I NOT SEEING ANY FANART OF THEM.... ::-( i have to fix this... ALSO I WISH they had dialogue. like are they even aware of their situation. missed opportunity !!

okay thats all i can think of now.

WAIT UM I READ THE COMIC CONTINUATION(?) the ghost in the machine AS WELL and i dont have many thoughts on it bc it was really confusing BUT i did enjoy the layers of horror and unreality which i really did not expect. was also expecting the titular ghost to have more to do with lora (SIGH I REALLY WANNA SEE HER AGAIN) but it didnt but thats okay. i really liked the art of the first book specificaly.....

do any tron fans also like soma (2015) haha just wondering [TWIRLS MY HAIR

[femmesandhoney]

I'm jealous of how many of you on radblr have like good enough moms. Mine was like beyond fucking abusive and I definitely got some internalized misogyny as a result.

And I'm not like trying to play trauma olympics or whatever, like I'm really not. I just see how a lot of you get this female solidarity thingy from your moms, and how much you love her and how much she scarcified for you and all that.

I can't relate to any of these things, the only person that tried and like fought for me was my dad so when you go on about your misandry I just feel so?? Idk i just dont have that anger in common with you.

And no this is not me saying that my dad is "one of the good ones", or that misandry is an overreaction to male oppression. I really need you to know that I don't have any bad intentions w this message.

This is kinda rambly. My US visa got approved today like 1 hour ago, and I only got 30 mins of happiness before she ruined everything.

I'm honestly glad it's at least over it was such a hassle. So yay I guess

Oh anon :( i don't think many people here have good relationships w their moms in a fantastic peas in a pod way. I love my mom, but she also fucked me up in many ways too. Everyone has various relationships w their mothers and the good parts people share here are likely not at all a good picture to compare yourself to either.

And there are definitely plenty of women here or whom we all know with terrible mothers. Women aren't immune to being bad parents and bad people just bc theyre women, obviously. One of my best friends growing up was raised by her dad and her mother was horrible. She was an alcoholic and never sent them to school. Her dad fought for custody of her and her brother, and he raised and loved them well. I would never try to defend her mother just bc shes a woman, she was an insanely horrible person and mother. Thats just an example of, like duh, there are fine fathers out there. Not every woman grows up w perfect moms. I think the idea that there's a way to be a perfect mother is also stupid, theyre people just like us. So i wouldn't necessarily be jealous of anyone. Even the "best" mom or dad will fuck up their kid in some way, thats just how being a parent works i think.

Im not sure what u mean about the misandry thing tho. We don't necessarily bond over our hatred of our fathers or our commonality of good mothers. Often we talk about how shitty men around us are yeah, which often will be immediate figures like fathers or male family, but misandry is about like all men being quite shitty a lot of the time in various ways lol? You don't gotta like start hating ur dad specifically when u start recognizing the patterns of male depravity and shittiness in the world 💀 i mean u could, but like no one is saying plz start hating ur dad if u have no real reason to. theres plenty of other shitty men to hate take ur pick lmao

[kawaii-angelanne]

naruto girl charas SUCK. and not the charas themselves, i LOVE LOVE LOVE sakusa, ino, tenten, temari, ya name her ! i love her, but the creator just writes them so horribly. he puts them in a light and most fans shit on women bc of their charas when really—they’d be liked if he gave a true backstory and plot for how they act they do.

sakura is known to be ‘two faced’ as she’s sweet outside but has a raging personality inside and everyone hates her for being obsessed with sasuke—but she’s a CHILD!! she gets more development once you meet her future teacher, and it makes me love her so much more bc it shows how strong she is and how CAPABLE she is. she’s more than just a girl with a silly crush // more than a girl who hides her true inner feelings. she cares for everyone around her and is seen as weak when she isn’t.

hinata is known to be a shy girl who’s obsessed with naruto, and she’s one of the strongest characters but the creator makes her weak. tenten canonically have the strongest weapons in the series but the creator makes her weak. temari is seen as strong only for her plot and in the future she’s discarded. all these women are thrown to the side because their entire future plot is to surround who they’re marrying—men. there’s only one female chara i can think of that doesn’t exactly surround a man but she’s still heavily influenced by two bc ones in love with her and the other was her childhood friend. (really tryna not spoil HAHA)

and even female villains, which there aren’t many i can think of, ALLLL SURROUND A MAN! long story short, kishimoto is a POS and probably has never known a woman on an actual personal level. plus the series is a rip off of HXH anyways 😇 emo chara family dies and they have red eyes ? and there’s a big bad group where the person who was responsible for it is homed there ? anyways naruto was my first anime besides DBZ when i was a lil kid and i love it and will cherish it to my heart but only bc i like the charas, i hate kishimoto. he’s dumb. and probably a 50 y/o virgin. (did u kno he got married and didn’t take his wife on a honeymoon bc of he was writing naruto? I HATE HIM I HATE HIM AAAAA!!) so sorry for the long winded response, i get so heated on this topic BAHAHAHAHAHA < 3 ily

OKAY YEA THATS WHAT I WAS THINKING!! i so badly want to get to like these characters, but the way kishimoto writes them is just. so bad. SO TRUE they all revolve around a guy and its so..*chokes the air* like in the land of the waves we see that she has the best control of her chakra (which ig makes her perfect to be a medical nin; ik like tiny bits and pieces of what happens in shippuden but also not rlly LMAO), but she never uses it!! she was never involved in any fights; she j stood there because she was written to be like that!!

i was also thinking that since they are like 10-12, they're not going to be the most fun characters; like at that age, children are v annoying LMFAO but its not 100% an excuse because the guy characters aren't as intolerable ;-;;;

im intrigued to see how tsunade is going to be written because like. shes HOKAGE. and SO COOL!! so yes.

love the charas, not their creator <3 (that's so funny how he didn't even take his wife on honeymoon; like higuruma would NEVER even tho he seems to do work a lot LMFAO (pov: you have not caught up w jjk but love higuruma because of ina))

(im also super impressed how you just whipped that out af! like. not even ten mins later and bam! research paper LOL)

[thatbitchsimone]

I love you I love you

Thank you thank you

It’s a long story of circle of abuse, I used to save her from my father hitting her and few years later I had to save myself from both of them hitting me

I truly believe she’s evil, not what she does to me but to others also, she beats and humiliates not only me but the maids too, the other siblings are not beaten, the brother sometimes rarely but he’s her worshipper so i don’t think he minds.

I will get a job soon but I don’t think I can move out, it’s not very common here you know, and my father is like a influential guy, but hopefully when I earn my own money and cut her off I’ll be happy, we have a big house so living separately is possible.

I found out something today and it made me sick to my stomach, I have my whole life faced disgusting men, but turns out my brother is also one of them, he is after all my fathers and mothers son. he is an Andrew tate fanboy btw so you can guess his entire personality by that lolllllll.

I am so sorry this is alot of stuff to hear on a site where you are supposed to have fun, I am sending you apology hugs, take care 🫂❤️

Btw have you read the bell jar by Sylvia plath? It’s so depressing it’s taking me months to finish HAHAHAH

that is fucking awful and yes, i dont even believe in the whole concept of evil (i was raised without religion in a completely secular country + im very into psychology so good vs evil is not part of my worldview lol) but some behaviors even i just have to describe as evil and ur mom fits that pretty well like abusing ur own children is fucking evil. i have empathy for her to some extent since her behavior is clearly the result of her being abused herself like u said but it gets clouded by the absolute disgust and hatred and rage i feel for her for letting herself become the abuser herself and keeping the circle of abuse going by passing it on to her children. its one thing to not have the strength or power to stop ur husband from abusing ur kids, but straight up joining in on the abuse is a whole other level of disgusting and im so sorry u have to experience this.

but i do have to say that u seem like a genuinely good person like i really feel like u have so much kindness and love in ur heart and u seem like a very strong, sensible and intelligent girl and i get a strong feeling that the cycle of abuse is gonna end with u (as in, u wont be carrying it on and u will break free from it and if u have kids in the future u will be a good and loving mom to them) and i just wanna acknowledge that bc thats amazing and inspiring and i admire u so much like i just have so much admiration for u right now like u are everything u are the moment u are the vibe

anyway, glad to hear that u at least live in a big house so that u can at the very least have some space from her even tho u live together. i get that its not as easy or simple as some ppl think to ”just move out” especially if u live in a very family oriented culture where its not the norm to do so on top of it all so i think the best thing to do currently is to just kind of try to stay out of her way and honestly just not even listen to the bullshit she says bc her insults are kinda meaningless tbh bc lets be real, if u were skinny she would just use something else to criticize u for. she just wants to put u down in any way she can no matter what u look like. u could probably look like a damn supermodel or movie star and she would still find something to pick on and put u down for, bc she has issues. shes disturbed. her words are empty and her opinions on u are just completely irrelevant. why should u care if a deranged abusive sadist doesnt ”approve” of ur body and size? this woman thinks its ok to mentally torment everyone around her, even HER OWN CHILDREN that she just so happens to not just verbally and emotionally abuse but straight up physically abuse. shes a child abuser. actual scum of the earth. like honestly next time she says something about ur body or calls u fat or whatever this psychopath likes to call u just remind urself that this woman is actually disturbed and sick in the head like shes literally a terrible human being lol who the fuck is she to criticize anyone like ok so u got a little extra meat on ur bones meanwhile she is a deranged sadistic child abuser. like girl whatever flaw u may have is nothing compared to the flaws she has like u are so far above her in every way that actually matters like ur literally so much better than her in every way like shes actually pathetic.

sorry about ur brother btw. seems like us women can never catch a break from these male parasites that are crawling around everywhere these days. they just keep getting worse and worse now with all the andrew tate shit brainwashing them. thank god we women have each others backs in this vile current climate. sisterhood is so important, especially now with all this crazy shit going around.

and yes ofc ive read the bell jar! read it for the first time when i was 16 and have reread it a few times since then. its one of those books that deeply resonates with nearly every woman who reads it even now generations later like its truly timeless in that way thats why its so good

[violentviolette]

I may be misreading the tags, but how exactly does your wife identify with the lesbian label? You're a trans man, so I'm curious as to how your wife's label affects the relationship and what not (as in, how does your wife view you and be attracted to you in a 'lesbian' way). Fuck I am asking this terribly LMAO if your wife is fine with elaborating on their label(s), that would be cool! I'd like to educate myself on "unconventional labels" more.

i think my wife identifies as a lesbian pretty easily actually lol pretty sure it's as natural as breathing for her at this point after 25+ years. and i actually dont think there's anything unconventional about it at all, she's just a lesbian and it doesnt really effect our relationship cause neither one of us has any issue with the others labels and we dont feel they contradict our own. my wife is a butch lesbian and im a nb trans man and thats really all there is to it. she loves me like a person loves another person

real life is very very rarely as neat and orderly and catagorized as online queer spaces make it sound, and i think our situation is much more common than most people who mostly only interact with other queer ppl online think. in real life queer communities specific labels matter WAY less than they ever do here, u dont have to change ur entire label and identity for a single person. my wife and i are both deeply queer and we love eachother and that's what matters most to us both.

we met and started dating when we were 19, i didnt realize i was trans until i was around like 25ish and at that point we'd been together for 6 years and had built a life with one another. we obviously had a lot of talks about it at first while i was first coming out and figuring out what i wanted for myself. we talked about what was important to each of us, what we were comfortable with, where each of our boundaries were, what were deal breakers for us, ect. Obviously every individual person is going to be different and everyones comfort levels and needs and preferences are going to be different, and so not everyone in our same position would feel the same, and if certain things were different about either of us we might not feel the same, but for us we ended up not really having any issues staying together

i think the biggest thing for each of us was retaining our autonomy and not feeling the need to change either of our language to try and accomodate the other. being a lesbian and that label is important to my wife, she isnt attracted to men and has no interest in dating men, she's a very classic butch dyke and that identity and community is important to her, so there's really no need for her to change her label or sense of self just to justify her love for me, it's just not neccessary. i know she loves me for the person i am because no one alive knows me better than her, and thats more than enough for me.

and in the same way i dont feel the need to downplay my masculinity or hide my gender or call myself any less of a man in order to justify loving and staying together with her. im a dude and a guy and i use he pronouns and she has always respected that and never tried to discourge me for her own sake. she wants me to be happy and authentic and true to myself and has no need or desire to feminize me in any way in order to continue to love me. she knows the whole person i am and is not only okay with that, but genuinely enjoys it. she can not love men while still loving me.

and thats really all there is to it, i dont think it's that unconventional or weird or even contradictary. we're queer and thats what matters. i think one of the best things about being queer is being able to fuck with those conceptions and those binaries and the rules given to us by cishet society

im a bisexual femme ass boygirl and my wife is a dyke ass lesbian girlboy. we're both a little gender fucky and thats the way we like it.

[imeverywoman420]

do you ever feel regret for doing SW back in the day? i’m so fucking ashamed dude, how do you cope?? i’m so scared the pictures and videos will resurface and ruin my life forever, i want to be seen as a respectable woman but things like that make me want to curl up into a ball and fucking cry forever

No cause i never showed hole lmao. Idc if people see my boobs. I wouldnt do it again bc the most degrading thing was knowing men jerk off to you GOD thats the grossest thing. Like barfff

I never really did pander to them that much id just act like my regular awkward cold self. Like i never flirted with them or anything like that. I was just posting vids of me dicking around playing video games and crying about my life but without a shirt and then had an onlyfans where i posted softcore boobs and ass.

Umm and idk for me personally ive never been under the impression that i was regular. I do what i want. Ive never judged myself via other peoples standards like that. Ive never lived the kind of live where i was a respectable girl lol ive always been like. On the margins. Crazy. Before covid i was gonna try to become a stripper (thank GOD i didnt) since i didnt tink i was gonna graduate high school but covid happwned and they mercy passed everyone.

Like im not gonna lie it makes me feel some emotions like disgust at the thought of men jerking off to me. But i guess my situation is different cause i never felt like i was doing sex work. I was just vibing with my boobs out lol. I have great boobs.

But never really regret. I kinned cardi b in high school i named my cat cardi….. idk i just always regarded myself more as a celebrity than a civ with like. Jobs and stuff. Like i worked in entry level marketing and restaurants. If i lost those jobs due to my nudes being leaked whooooo gives a fuck

Sorry if this didnt help but thats my truth… i empathize with u tho and wish i could commiserate.

[annoyingfobbie]

i hope midtown sucked balls. no fair that i literally have to suffer daily through being a jersey girl and u just take fun girls nights with gabe saporta (totally don’t use this as an excuse to post extensively abt the show bc i know it kicked ass and u want to share & i want to hear about it)

IT WAS GREAT!!! I met up there with one of my best friends internet friends and SHE MET GABE????? fucking awesome as hell, she like went to go do something before the show and i was holding our spots at the barricade (because this was. you know. an actual show with an actual barricade at an actual venue. also she really wanted barricade because GABE SAPORTA) and then she comes back and is like "I mnet gabe saporta. he shook my hand" KJLSHGJLKSFGHJK??????

after the show we went out back to see if the band was gonna come out to meet people, but then it turned out that gabe was inside, side stage, tlaking to people, so we were like, okay lets go in there. but they were all like NO REENTRY which is SUCH BULLSHIT anyways i made up something about forgetting my hoodie in there but they were like "okay we'll send someomne in to look for it" so i wouldn'tve been able to go in so i was just like "oh wait my friend just texted me that she found it" so anyways i came SO CLOSE to meeting Gabe but alas i did not.

BUT! THE BEST NEWS IS!!! They kept talking about making this Midtown show YYEARLY THING. And at the end they wrre like "SEE U NEXT YEAR" SOOOOOO,,,,,,, DON'T LOSE HOPE YET BECAUSE NEXT YEAR YOU AND I CAN TOTALLY GO AND SEE THEM AND MAYBE MEET THEM AND SHIT!!!

about the actual show: they were fucking awesome, they were all clearly having a lot of fun, Gabe is so tall holy shit, Tyler is like so hot, the crowd was dead as hell during the openers which was sad but went crazy for Midtown (i hate when that happens but you know thats life i guess :/).

as SOON as Midtown came out, these two men in like their forties like SHOVED themselves up against the barricade RIGHT between my friends internet friend (who i'm just gonna refer to as my frined from here on out lol) and I were standing, so we got separated by these giant dudes, and I was being full onm like SQUISHED between this guy and the person on the other side of me, like, it was insane, my shoulders were being destroyed, but i was NOT gonna move, because i was front and center and I really didn't want anyone to be in front of me and slam their head back into my new piercings fksdjhghkgfdj. anyways, the guy was nice though, he checked on me like a million times throughout the show being like "if you need me to move just let me know!" which was total bullshit bc this man was NOT about to give up barricade, he and his friend were like going so fucking crazy, like they were biggest midtown fans of all time. but yeah he was nice, and everytime there were crowd surfers over us (which was a LOT because like,,, barricade. and there were just a lot of crowd surfers, more than I've experienced at any other show before) he would like tell me to duck down and cover my head and then when they were gone hed like like "are you good?" and i sort of jsut wanted to be like "sir i can fucking handle myself" but i didn't because its always nice when bigger people in the crowd look out for the 5'2 bitches like me. Anyways I DID get kicked/kneed/elbowed in the head a few times from crowd surfers but each time I barely felt it, it was totally fine. This one girl next to me got kicked REAL hard during the encore though, i genuinely think she got some sort of minor concussion or something, she looked very out of it afterwards. everyone kept checking on her including like security and Tyler and anyone around her in the crowd but she kept just saying she was totally fine and didn't need medical attention. but like. i realllllly hope she went to the medical people afterwards because she did NOT look okay.

afterwards I managed to get a setlist! I've never gotten a setlist before, nor have I ever like met a band i'm a fan of (not including hc shows were the bands aren't famous and therefore just hang out with everyone for the rest of the show), so that was really exciting for me!

but omg i really hope they're able to pull through on the yearly thing because i wanna see them again so fucking bad and also it'd be fucking awesome to see them with you!!!

[genshinluvr]

in terms of the issue with limited tags, it might be better in the future to limit the harem chapters to a handful of featured characters, but keeping it established that all the men are still into y/n and theyre still around in in the abode and everything as usual so its still the same harem lol, just with different focuses per chapter. this would also help manage line distribution so its easier to keep track of who's said what, and give more opportunities to have more romantic moments ^^ of course, a downside would be that some ppl wont have their favorites in every chapter and to fix that youd have to do multiple parts maybe but that honestly sounds like a lotta work </3 i love heizou already and i know ill love a lot of future characters too, as will many many people, but if its easier for you, you dont have to add all of them to one single post every time with limited tags. thats just my thoughs though, i just rlly love the isekai harem and would hate for u to get overwhelmed by it ;v;

Yeah, that's one thing that worries me the most (other than the limited tags for Tumblr) is being able to include 15+ characters into the story without accidentally leaving someone out or giving them way fewer lines compared to the characters that have been in the harem since the very beginning.

I've thought about reblogging those stories but with more added tags to them, but I'm not entirely sure if it'll work. I want everyone to be included and not have them be left out since I know there will be people that are wondering as to why their favorite character isn't in the latest chapter or has fewer lines/is featured less in the Various Genshin Men x Isekai'd!Reader fic.

But we'll have to wait and see about that because I don't really like leaving characters out. I know there won't be any tagging issues on AO3, but the tagging is the main issue on Tumblr for me ;-; I wish they'd let us use as many hashtags, but I don't think it'll happen anytime soon ;v;

[whiskyblu]

Ok the fuckboy allegations agains Jae eon are making more sense.

Ep 2 starts with Na Bi and Jae On about to kiss under a tree, then he gets a call, and has to leave.  

Enter Best Girl Bit Na trying to explain to Na Bi

“Flowers don’t bloom for just one butterfly….he’s like a flower, a symbol of seductive beauty that withers once its plucked…and you don’t know how to keep things casual.”

And now that Na Bis been warned, Best Girl Bit Na proceeds to support and enable Na Bi to have as many orgasms as possible before she gets her heart broken. 

And thats when I realized, I’m the fuckboi here. Like I’m pretty sure most of the people calling JaeOn a fuckboy would say the same about me because, while I’m not Song Kang Hot (bc really who tf is?) or as calculated about it as Jae On, that’s pretty much how I relationship. Like a neighborhood cat that wanders from house to house, no one knows who it technically belongs to, but everyone lets it in their house, feeds it, loves it, and lets it back out when its ready.  If this dynamic does not spark joy in you, I’m probably not a good fit lol

Bit Na gets demoted from best girl to fuck girl for a bullshit speech about how men and women can’t be friends. -.- 

Ok here’s where I get annoyed with jae eon, dude takes Na bi to a club, and she clearly hates it and has her ears covered and wants to leave. And he just acts cute and gently manipulates her into dancing with him and ‘having fun in spite of herself” cuz she’s so into him. Both cheesy and obnoxious. If it’s not fuck yea, it’s no my dude. In everything else as in sex.

Ok this part is dumb, too.

Nabi walks out of the club to meet Jae eon, who’s smoking outside. A girl gets to JE before Nabi does and clearly knows him, asks if he wants to come hang out with them, asks if he’s with anyone. A perfectly reasonable friendly interaction.

Nabi gets all sad and insecure, and Jae Eon…he reacts the way an insecure mono person would want him too, but it’s rude and stupid. He like. Looks at NaBi, looks kind of annoyed and nervous, and then puts an arm around NaBi and is all “i’m with her you can hang out without.” Girl suggests they can all hang out together, NaBi is like “no I can leave its fine!” -.-

Like. The appropriate way to handle that interaction is to be friendly, introduce everyone “i’m here with this person to night, we’re gonna hang out on our own. See you next time!” and everyone fucks off their separate ways. 

But no. it’s all…tense and dumb. 

Ok so I left a thing out.  Theres this butterfly theme in the show. NaBi, I think, means butterfly, or sounds like butterfly in korean. JE has a Thing for butterflies. Like a cat lady, but butterflies. And the first time NaBi and Jae Eon met, he beat her at darts, and “the winner grants the loser a wish.” His wish was to draw a butterfly on her forearm in marker. Very cute, she didn’t wash it off, blah blah. 

When he saw her again, he was like “oh its still there, it’s water based marker it should be gone by now.”

So, enter Random Club Girl, she’s got the same butterfly on her arm and its fresh. So, you know. More insecurity for NaBi

NaBi asks about the butterfly and he’s like “she did that on her own, she must’ve wanted to see how I’d react…she was a little obsessed with me and delusional.”

Squints ok yellow flag. That could be true. Or bullshit. Or “she wanted to date and I didn’t and then she wouldn’t leave me alone.” All plausible, but kinda shady. So, point in the fuckboy column.

The green flag, tho. Is that dude communicates. Addresses the situation head on, checks in. Asks here ‘hey why’d you try to ditch me?” and then proceeds to be reassuring and. You know. Normal about it. MonoNabi is unconvinced, and I am annoyed.

UGH fucking ji wan again. “Sol! Your so pretty! Even your eyebrows!” *pets eyebrows* “so what are we doing for lunch?”

Being closeted sucks. Oblivious straight girls suck, even when they are less straight than pre-gay. 

Sidebar. Deeply fucking annoying thing in both kdrama and us stuff: character has some completely insignificant owie, and the other person fusses like they’ve broken an ankle. Bitch it’s a papercut, calm down.

Anyway, like that, and PJ being overly concerned is the thing that makes her think “yeah, no, I gotta nip this in the bud”

-.- Maybe I’m just too old for tv that doesn’t have monsters in it.

*a bunch of unnecessary angst about completely normal dating behavior*

…and then it gets gross. He messages her a lot and she ignores him, and angsts, and has a sex dream about him. Which. I mean. Fair.

Then  she’s in class with him, and she has a Period disaster, so she starts acting uncomfortable and tries to escape, he goes to check on her-and notices she's trying to cover up her butt. So he just wraps a shirt around her waist.

Yeah, total fuck boy *eyeroll*

And then later when GoodFriend BitNa is trying to talk NaBi down from getting her heart broken she’s like:

“The things that make you feel special probably mean nothing to him. He’s nice to everyone without exception.”

DUDE.

He’s perfect. Why? Whis is this a problem? I’m so confused. The only ML with zero red flags and HE’S a fuckboy in a toxic situationship?

MAKE IT MAKE SENSE.

There’s another drunk college kids party, and it gets a little. People hang out at Na bis house, everyone scatters for a minute (cue some cute shit) and Na Bi seek Jae eon kissing one of the other girls

Ok, this part is gross. As soon as he sees NaBi, and tells the other girl “go back inside, I gotta make a phone call” and makes a very sincere-seeming, direct bid to be kissing NaBi instead instead…and she wipes the other girls lipstick off of him and kisses him.

Now I’ve got some fuckin feelings.

Like. He says something dumb like “oh, nbd, the girl just wanted to try kissing, I’d rather be kissing you.”  

So like. Man is either a supervillain, ho edition, and is trying to see how far he can push her, or…idek.

Like. He’s obviously trying to persuade her to become part of the rotation, which is valid. But this just seems fuckin disrespectful to both of them. 

Except if I was flirting with someone at a party, and saw him kissing someone else, it wouldn’t bother me. I mean, ok yes, I’m a human person who gets jealous but…not angry or disapproving. More like “ooh i wanna be smooching them too, get it, girl” you know? Like it wouldn’t bother me to be one of a few people making out with him in one night. 

I miiight even feel weird to watch him ditch her to come make out with me?  

Im also established enm, and very open about it so…different dynamics.

This is me being genuinely annoyed at our boy for the first time

[stupid-o-clock]

i still feel shitty around my friends. i ranted about this to my best friend earlier but i want to put this here so i'll basically copy paste my feelings.

i'm gonna call my friends P & V bc typing "friend"/"other friend" etc gets confusing after a while.

i was playing huniepop bc it's a fun game when u have nothing to do, but my P saw it in my discord status and immediately dmed the gc "BRO [me] IS PLAYING HUNIEPOP" and we started arguing about it bc she thinks these type of games are weird, idc lol. if u don't like them, don't play them, why get into my business? we have the most opposite opinions on so much shit like why even bother trying to start this

she complained about genshin nsfw popping up on her tl a while ago and told me to stop liking it, no? dont interact, click "not interested", block, even unfollow me idc not like we interact much anyway. gosh

she was so much better to have as a friend before we got close, i started having this feeling recently like once i get to know someone well it becomes weird. like damn, you know my trauma and ik yours? weirdo.. bye-bye! my gf, two best friends + two also pretty close friends are the only exceptions. but that's maybe because i got to know them before i started feeling like this?

tbh with these two it always feels like they've got something against me for no reason, that "no reason" also being im a dude. with all the shit they say n do it's a really toxic women>men type thing LOL and i can never say anything bc they'd team up on me!!

i don't think i'm ever included in those messages but thats bc im trans. if i was a cis dude theyd bully me into the ground, but i dont wanna be treated diff bc im a TRANS guy, im just a guy. the trans doesnt matter. treat me the same youd treat a cis one. and if you cant then we shouldnt be friends!

now this is about V and her boyfriend, theyve got a thing like he unfriends/blocks anyone she doesnt like going on. n one night he wanted her to unf all the dudes shes friends with, including me. personally idgaf but P got really pissed about it.

P said smth like "what did we say about not controlling women in relationships?" and like.. what? V is essentially controlling her boyfriend, so why can't he do the same? P just brushed it off tho bc V is an angel! and she could never do anything bad! her bf don't know that lol?

just like how i'm deffo not a love interest for her, everyone she makes him unfriend probably also isn't! maybe she got bad vibes or whatever that's ok! but god

also P used the r-slur when going off at V's boyfriend and that just rubbed me the wrong way. she's definitely "allowed" to use/reclaim it but it feels like an awful word, AND she was using it to insult someone which makes it even worse.

i feel like i can never disagree with P either bc she'll pull a "shut up ur a man" card. like- she's done that. she's done it as a joke but she'd deffo do it in a serious manner too-

also, i got into a fight- like- not a fight but i genuinely said smth really LOL i feel bad about it but P was shit talking me to xiya and then pulled up in my dms like Hey [me] i care aout you! You fucked up but it's ok u ust have to learn how to communicate

Like what is this? u can't tell me u care about me after spewing this shit into my girlfriends dms.

"i dont go out of my way to hurt people. he needs help lol" like bitch ik i need help. i did say the "joke" with intent to hurt V but it was in the MOMENT. yk how fucking frustrating it is explaining anger issues to someone who doesn't get it whatsofuckingever?

P has a load of her own issues that i dont ge tbut i at least TRY to understand her. also, first screenshot i wanetd to explain myself so V could see where im coming from?? LOL explaining ursef =/= makinf urself the victim.

i always overexplain shit, like my mistakes and why i think i made them. im also bad at explaining so i go on and on to try and make it make sense. i was literally blaming myself for hurting V and syaing sorry over and over again, how the hell was i making myself a victim?

[pcktknife]

Genuine question not really looking to be malicious in any way promise. Why are bi/pan lesbians in your dni but you support neogenders/pronouns?? If gender can be weird and fluid why can't sexuality? It just to me sounds like the kind of arguments that binary trans people make against people who aren't trans "in the right way" so to speak. Like I'm genuinely wondering if I'm missing something, I'm trying to do research and I really want to understand people's views before I jump to any harsh conclusions. Sidenote I do love your art💕

good morning im way too tired to give this a long thorough answer but not only are they harmful labels to lesbians,direspectful to bisexuals and trans people in what world would it make sense to id as a bi/pan lesbian when bi/pan already exist as their own labels ?

[spinster-sisters]

Crush. PSH, JYN

TW: dom! Seonghwa, sub! Yunho, sub! Reader,threesome, exhibitionism, degradation (use of the words slut and whore), bondage (male receiving), Sir kink, overstim (kinda, idk how much counts as overstim but im putting it here anyway), excessive use of the word wet, panty kink, buldging, k so heres the deal, in this thing yunho has a crush on both the reader and seonghwa and seongwha is probably also attracted to men based on the way i wrote this but there is no actually mxm interaction PHYSICALLY, also fun fact at no point anywhere in this is there the letters Y/N cuz i have decided i hate that shit and istead u get excessive pet names.

WC: 4k

AN: this is 4k words of pure smut, like plot if you SQUINT right at the begnining but even that is pretty smutty. ngl its prettyy shit. im sorry lol. also this isnt specifically idolverse or nah, it could kinda go either way so thats that i guess.

Yunho had always had a crush on you, that much everyone knew, but when you and seonghwa began dating Yunho had decided to put his own feelings aside out of respect for both you and seonghwa. Maybe it worked for a while, a few months of being genuinely happy for his two friends finding love. Yeah, it was hard seeing one of his best friends get to touch you and talk to you in the way he wanted to, but the smiles that never left either of your faces were well worth it.

But then that night came.

He hadn't meant to see it. All of your friends had gone out to a crowded club, there was dancing and a lot of drinking. But with all the chaos of the night, nobody noticed when you and seonghwa slipped into the bathroom. A while later Yunho found himself needing to pee and made his way to the back of the club as well, but when he pushed open the door all thoughts of his original plans had left. There you were, spread out on the counter, chest heaving, tiny drops of sweat making their way down your neck. And there was seonghwa, standing between your legs slamming his hips into yours and a brutal pace, absolutely RUINING you. His back was to the door and your eyes were screwed shut, Yunho had only opened the door just far enough to see in so neither of the two of you had noticed him yet.

Yunho's first reaction was to close the door and pretend he hadn't seen anything, but he couldn't move, not once he heard the filth spewing seonghwas lips.

"My baby girl got so needy she needed me to fuck her with all of her friends around? What a little slut"

That was the first thing Yunho heard, and then whine that the words pulled out of you was damn near-pornographic, and it went straight to his dick. He only stood there for a few more moments before closing the door, but the damage had been done.

Did you guys fuck like this all the time? It felt so wrong, the perfect lovey-dovey couple Yunho had come to know were hiding such a dirty side to themselves.

Ever since that night, nothing has been the same. Yunho's thoughts of you turned more and more sinful than they had ever been, but there was something else. At first, Yunho thought it had just been the embarrassment of seeing such a private moment, but Yunho was now having the same amount of trouble meeting Seonghwas eyes as yours. Every time Yunho's mind drifted back to that moment Seonghwas figure was just as clear as yours, and although he didn't want to admit it, it was seonghwas words in the bathroom that made Yunho hard.

And that is how Yunho had come to discover that he had a crush and not one, but both of you. And almost every time Yunho took time to relive himself all he could image was seonghwas sharp and defined features manipulating your soft and supple ones into increasingly compromising positions, his calm voice eliciting those same desperate whines from you.

He knew this was fucked.

Yunho doesn't know at what point seonghwa became aware of his infatuation with himself and his girlfriend, maybe he had noticed him in the bathroom and chosen not to say anything, maybe mingi had told him one night in a slip of the tongue, maybe Yunho had told seonghwa himself while drunk. Either way, it all lead him to this moment. He was sitting in your bedroom with his back pressed into a wooden chair with seonghwa standing behind him binding his wrist together with a soft scarf you had lying around.

You sat on your bed observing the scene. This had all been seonghwa's idea, but you were more than willing. That being said watching your perfectly composed boyfriend secure the taller boy who had been stripped down to his boxers to a chair facing your bed was enough to have your face burning in the chilly room.

Seonghwa finished with the restraint and made his way in front of Yunho, who was already damn near star-eyed. Seonghwa reached out and clenched the man's jaw, forcing his eyes up to meet his own.

"Remember Yunho, you are here to watch. Not to touch. No matter how much you want to," seonghwa spoke in that calm domineering voice he reserved for moments like these. Yunho nodded eagerly as well as he could while his face was still in seonghwas grasp, his cheeks puffing out a little at the pressure.

Seonghwa let go of his face and ran his hand once through the younger boys' hair approvingly before both of their gazes fell on you.

You had been waiting patiently in the sweetest little lingerie set you could find. Seonghwa was still fully clothed, but he had a thing about having you look as pretty as possible before fucking you so hard you cried. With both of their attention now firmly on you, the cold of the room couldn't seem any further away, and with every step, seonghwa made twords you, you couldn't help but clench your thighs together in anticipation.

Finally, he stood before you, looking so beautiful it was unfair, close enough you could reach out and touch him. But you didn't, you knew better.

Seonghwa gave a wicked smirk at your sweet expectant face. The stage was finally set, and it was time for the show. He looked contemplative for a moment, before deciding on his first move.

"Lay back for me, baby"

You did exactly that, allowing your head to hit the soft blankets. Never breaking eye contact, however hard it was as your boyfriend looked ready to absolutely devour you. Careful not to block anything from Yunho's view seonghwa slowly climbed onto the bed on top of you using his hips to keep your legs in place and his arms coming down to cage your top half. He moved his head to your ear and spoke in his smoothest softest voice.

"Remember to be good sweetheart, we have a guest and I don't want to waste time punishing you tonight."

You whimper out a quiet "ok" before seonghwa placed a soft kiss on your temple. And he didn't stop there, your boyfriend only pulled back for a brief moment to observe your flushed face before diving back in.

Seonghwa was organized and neat in most aspects of life, but kissing was not one of them. His kisses are hard and wet. His exceptionally plump lips forced yours to follow his lead, prying your mouth open, nipping, and sucking at anything he could. Wet was the perfect word to describe it. Wet and amazing. Normally you would have waited for permission to touch him before swinging your arms around his neck pulling him closer but when his tongue found its way into your mouth toying with your own you needed someone to ground yourself.

To your surprise seonghwa had no objection to this instead threading his left hand through your hair pulling your head close as well, letting out a deep grunt in the process. His lips began to travel down to your neck and jaw, and now the sloppiness turned a little rougher. Seonghwa took a small break to speak, barely lifting his lips off your body but his voice still carried loud and clear.

" Don't hold back your sweet little cries, I'm sure Yunho would love to hear them"

Your mouth now free to cry out little by little at the way the cold air made contact with your now burning skin every time he moved. He was covering your skin in small red patches that would surely turn dark purple by tomorrow. You braced yourself on his shoulders when his lips came to rest of the swell of your chest. Seonghwas right had found its way under your knee lifting it a bit and caressing the underside of your thigh. You had finally become used to the sensation of his mouth on your body when he bit down. Hard.

You damn near choked. You threw your head back as a deep whine spilled sinfully out of you much louder than you intended. But it wasn't just you that was making noises, a deep guttural groan could be heard in harmony with your own from across the room. It was only then did you finally dare to turn your head to where Yunho sat. And you almost wished you didn't. The tall boy sat as hunched over as he could be, positively panting with desire his eyes staring, unblinking, and where you and your boyfriend were tangled together. Your eyes locked, Yunho was staring at you with so much hunger your heat throbbed, and your thighs clenched together. Seonghwas words cut through the tension bringing your attention back to him.

"My baby is so eager, looking so pretty as wrapped up for me. Just waiting for me to pull her apart."

You instinctively nodded.

"Yes, please. I'll be good I promise" you pleaded vacantly, still gripping your boyfriend for support. Seonghwas's right hand began to slide its way up the underside of your leg before moving around till he was palming the inside your leg.

"I know darling, I know you will"

A knowing smile graced his lips before he unhooked the clasp on your pretty bra, sliding it down your shoulders. You held your breath as he pulled himself back to sit on his heels still caressing your leg dangerously close to where you were currently making a mess of your nicest panties.

Seonghwa would never admit that he had a panty kink, but seeing you laid out for him in nothing but the thin little soaked scrap of fabric was scratching an itch that he didn't even know he had. He just had to take a moment to appreciate it.

Seonghwa turned his head twords Yunho. And speaking in that same clear strong voice.

"Yunho"

The boys eyed shaped up to meet seonghwas. Yunho, aside for the occasional moan or groan and been relatively silent up until that point. He looks at seonghwa expectantly. Your boyfriend sighed. Shaking his head for a moment.

"Yunho, when I talk to you I expect words." As he spoke seonghwa tightened his grip on your thigh, you let out a tiny moan. Yunho's eyes flashed to your thigh for a moment before realizing his distraction then flying back to seonghwas face. It was like he couldn't get the word out fast enough.

"Yes?" The word tumbled from his lips haphazardly.

"Yes, what?" Your boyfriend responded, clearly unamused, a scowl making its way onto his face.

Yunho visibly panicked, eyes darting around the room quickly. He didn't know what he missed. He looked at you for help. You knew what he missed, but you had no way of telling him.

"Umm," he began, still searching for the answer. Just when seonghwa looked like he was about to cut in a look of realization hit Yunho. He remembered the night not too long ago that he had come home from dinner, expecting the house to be quiet only to hear a specific word scream from your lips as he passed seonghwas room.

"Yes, sir?" Yunho asked, his eyes wide and pleading.

Seonghwa couldn't help his look of satisfaction.

"Good boy,"

The words made Yunho's face light up.

"Now Yunho, what would you like to see?" Your boyfriend asked. This question clearly took Yunho by surprise.

"Come on, I know you have been imagining me and my doll doing all kinds of things," as he spoke his hand finally slipped inside your panties. Two cold fingers sliding between your folds. You shudder out a gasp. You were wet, unbelievably so. It took so little for his fingers to slip through your slick, toying with you like he had done so many times before.

Yunho momentarily lost his focus on seonghwa instead looking at the imprint of his hand through the fabric. He looked starved. But his eyes returned to seonghwa once again.

"So, what is it. What was your favorite thing to imagine when you touch yourself." As he spoke his fingers began to make slow tight circles to your clit. You moaned out again and grasped wildly for a moment to ground yourself against the blankets.

Yunho once again looked at a loss for words, this time unable to peel his eyes away from the dark stain in your panties and the forearm connected to the hand in them.

Yunho licked his lips slowly before tearing his eyes away to look at seonghwa. He spoke slowly, his words were shaky but certain.

"Please, just fuck her. Hard, like you, always do." He looks embarrassed by his choice, but your heart leaped at the idea, you wanted seonghwa inside you right at that very moment. He was slowly working you into an orgasm and he had barely even done anything yet.

"Really? Is that all you want?" Your boyfriend asked. "No special requests?" The circles on your bud speed slightly as he spoke. Your legs began twitching with every stroke. You had been so wound up this whole time that along with every jerk a small whine was seeping past your lips.

"Please, just," Yunho took a moment to gather his thoughts " please, I just want to see what you both look like when you ruin her."

Seonghwa looked at the boy pensively for a moment.

"Ruin her?" Your boyfriends intense gazed finally made its way back to you "that I can do" and almost exactly as his sentence finished your first wave of orgasm crashed over you. You were now spilling whines freely and rocking your hips into your boyfriend's large hands. You closed your eyes tight for a few moments. Before thinking about the exchange that just took place. Ruin you? Seonghwa was a serious man when he wanted to be, and if he promised to ruin you, you knew he would. And honestly, it was a little scary.

Finally, you opened your eyes. Your boyfriend had been watching you through your high, not stopping his hand and now that you were coming down a dull pain replaced began to radiate up from your core. You reached down to grab his wrist

"Wait. Please-" you began to plead, looking into your boyfriend's eyes, but your words were cut off.

"Well, Yunho. If I'm going to ruin her I'm going to have to prepare her. Wouldn't want her to break" you whined at his words as his hand began to speed up once again over your extra sensitive nub. He then glanced over at the boy who seemed just as transfixed by your pleasure-filled face as seonghwa. "unless you want that"

"Please," was all Yunho could force out "I just want to see"

Seonghwa finally pulled his hand out from the ruined fabric. Despite the numbing pain that came from his handy work you were already missing the sensation and your hand on his wrist tightened again.

Seonghwa let out a sigh.

"Sweetheart, how am I supposed to let Yunho see what I can do to you if you still have these panties on," he asked in a disappointed tone. You reluctantly released his wrist.

Seonghwa finally found the time to pull his sweater over his head, tousling his hair in the process. Now it was both you and Yunho gawked. It was something both you and Yunho had seen a thousand times, but there was still something awe-inspiring about the way he looked kneeling over you with his bare golden honey skin on display.

If seonghwa noticed the stares he didn't address them as he moved to pull your ruined panties down your legs. The anticipation was clear on Yunho's face as the wet fabric slowly made its way down your legs. Finally, he pulled them off the tip of your toes. Because of you and seonghwas position, Yunho still couldn't see your heat. To your surprise, seonghwa stood up quickly from the bed. Your panties still between his fingers. He looked at Yunho.

"You want them?" He asked letting them dangle from his hand that was still glistening with your juices. Yunho choked out a "yes, sir"

Satisfied with his answer seonghwa walked over to the man, leaned over him, and slipped the fabric into his bound hands.

Your boyfriend then returned to you on the bed, but instead of climbing on top of you, he sat down beside you.

"Open up baby"

It may be a bit late in the game, but you were finally coming to terms with what is happening. Yunho, one of your closest friends is about to watch you get fucked by your boyfriend, you had to look away from the man at the sudden realization. Slowly, you opened your legs and you heard the sharp intake of breath that could only be from Yunho.

"What do you think?" Your boyfriend asked pulling your legs apart even more. You shut your eyes tight, feeling embarrassed.

"It's pretty" was all Yunho could Say. You flushed even deeper.

"I know, isn't it? My baby has such a pretty pussy" you choked.

"Open your eyes sweetheart, I want to look at you"

Slowly you opened them, still keeping your gaze firmly on your boyfriend's face.

"No need to be embarrassed sweetheart. You look so cute" seonghwa said in a coo.

Seonghwas hand slipped further between your legs, spreading you open for Yunho to see. You couldn't help but sneak a glance at the man. He was almost drooling, as he licked his lips.

"She tastes amazing," seonghwa says dipping a finger into your still sensitive heat. You felt yourself twitch.

"Normally I would spend hours eating her sweet little cunt, but that wasn't what you wanted to see" seonghwa spoke with false regret. Honestly, Yunho looked right now like there was nothing else in the world he would rather witness but everyone knew he had already made his choice.

Your boyfriend finally decided to push 2 fingers into you all at once. You whined out at the sudden intrusion.

"I have to get her ready first, I hope you don't mind" seonghwa spoke with a chuckle. Because no, with a view like that how could Yunho mind watching your boyfriend's two long fingers push in and out of you over and over again each time bringing a little more wetness out of you.

At this point you were gone, the pleasant stretched of the familiar fingers moving inside of you was like a mantra pulling small noises from you like a song. Seonghwa was brushing the inside of your walls oh so perfect if was unfair.

"She is always so wet, pulsing around my finger with so little work. What a little slut." Your eyes shot open with a moan at his words. His pace quickened. With your still heightened sensitivity, you already felt your stomach tighten.

"Oh. Do you like that? Like it when I call you my slut?"

"Yes, sir"

"Do you like being a little whore for me?"

"Yes, sir"

"Do you want me to fuck you in front of our friend, just so he can see how much of a slut you are?" At that, you locked eyes with Yunho across the room.

"Yes please sir, please show him how much of a slut I am for you" Yunho lurched forward for the first time, his dick straining so hard against his boxers it must be painful.

Seonghwa leaned down to give you a quick kiss on the forehead,

"Good girl"

Finally, seonghwa focused all his energy on bringing on your next orgasm. Pressing deliciously against that special spot inside you while his thumb returned to your pulsing clit. You were already so far gone that it only took a few more direct strokes for you to come tumbling down once again.

This one lasted much longer than the first. And once again seonghwa prolonged it as long as possible by not stopping his hand once throughout the whole time. The pleasure came on waves, washing over you with so much intensity it was all you could do to keep moaning so loud the neighbors could hear you.

Finally, when he pulled his fingers out you took a moment to catch your breath. But it wasn't long before it was stolen again by seonghwa sticking each finger in his mouth one at a time a sucking them clean, never once breaking eye contact with the boy in the chair.

"Hmm, sweet" was all he said, before standing from the bed once again and undoing his belt. Seonghwa pushed his hair back before undoing his jeans and pulling them down his legs. At last, he stood in nothing but his black boxers. If you weren't struggling so hard to keep your eyes open after your climax you would have ogled but Yunho's hungry eyes were wide and fixed on the impressive size of the tent in your boyfriend boxers. Seonghwa spared him a glace before chuckling.

Your boyfriend turned completely to Yunho and pulled down the boxers as well. You knew what was there, so you understand the feeling Yunho was having to lick his lips like that. Yunho's arms once again lurched forward.

"Remember, no touching" was all seonghwa said before turning back to you. He says down on the bed beside you once again

"Come sit on my lap baby,"

You almost groaned. You felt like you could barely move and you would much rather he take you just as you are, but you know better than to fight him.

Seonghwa positioned you both facing Yunho, so he could have the perfect view of you both.

You tried to keep your self as steady as possible as lined himself up under you. Your muscles protested as you held yourself up. Finally, seonghwa took hold of your hips and pushed you down onto him all at once. The two of you both let out a satisfied groan. Your pussy felt used and abused but at that moment all you could think about was how nice it felt to be full. Your head fell back onto your boyfriend's shoulder almost immediately.

"Awe, do I make you feel that good, baby? You like it when I fill you up that much?"

"Yes, sir, I love being full. Love it when you fill me up." Your words were slurred together but loud. Seonghwa, using his grip on your hips. Helped you lift yourself only to be pulled back down again.

"Holy fuck" Yunho spoke in a quiet tone, watching where your boyfriend's dick was now disappearing inside of you.

"Don't use that kind of language" seonghwa spat out while staring to set a fast and deliberate pace, his focus instead on fucking you to tears.

"I'm sorry sir, it's just-" he seemed to be at a loss for words. " I can see you in her tummy"

At that seonghwa chuckled again. He took your hand and lead it to the spot on your stomach you could feel him inside you.

"I know, my baby is such a slut she isn't satisfied until I fill her up this much."

All of these words were filtering in and out of your ears but all you could focus on was the feeling of seonghwas dick moving inside of you. You were so sensitive after two orgasms not so long ago that your body felt utterly spent but every single time seonghwa trusted up into you felt like you could cry at how good it felt. It hurt, yes it hurt, seonghwa was big, that's why he spent so much time working you up, but even with that, you could still feel him stretching out your wall in the most delicious way. Every time he pushed all the way into you could almost cry at the sensation, not to mention how he rubbed against every spot inside of you in the perfect way. You were a mess of whines and cries and tears.

"She's crying" Yunho spoke in a shaking voice.

Seonghwa brushed your hair away from your face, looking at the tears streaming on your face. Your boyfriend placed feather-light kisses against your cheeks where the tears streamed down. A stark contrast to the brutal pace he was drilling his hips into your cunt.

You were clenching madly against him and he couldn't help but chuckles, though it was now somewhat airy as he was nearing his own climax.

"You gonna come, baby?" He asked.

"Mmhmm" you whined, head still rolled back as he fucked into your relentlessly. You were so close, every time he pushed back into you you cried out wanting him to make you come so fucking bad.

Seonghwa took told of your chin with one hand and forced your head forward making you lock eyes with Yunho. He looks almost as fucked out as you probably did. Forehead sweating, chest heaving, dick twitching. The sight made you clenched down hard.

"Who knew my sweet little baby, want people to watch her get fucked like a whore." you clenching tears streaming down faster than ever. The hand not holding your chin found your clit and once again began rubbing slow but rough circles onto the bud. You were so full and so close, and knowing that Yunho was seeing you like this, looking him in the eye while seonghwa fucked you almost made you come.

"What do you think Yunho? Should I let my little slut come?" He asked pinching your bud and delivering a particularly hard thrust. You gagged on the drool spilling from your mouth.

" yes, please sir, please make her cum!: Yunho almost shouted, looking crazed.

"You heard him slut. Cum."

And that was all it took. You were shaking and writhing on top of your boyfriend, head and eyes rolled back and your eyes saw stars. Waves don't even being to describe the way pleasure was moving through your body.

"Sir, it feels so good" was all you could say between the cries, and yes you were crying for real now. Short of losing consciousness, you were gone to the world. Lost in the feeling.

It took you several minutes to realize that seonghwa was still fucking you. But once you did you jerked painfully.

"No, no please" fell past your dry lips. As you moved to sit up. But seonghwas had kept you in place.

"You're not going anywhere baby, I still haven't cum yet and I am going to right in your little pussy."

It hurt, and you were crying, but all you wanted to do was be a good girl for seonghwa so you stayed put, letting him use you. You looked up at Yunho, your eyes glossy, mouth hanging open, probably covered in bruises as you always were when seonghwa fucks you.

Yunho moaned out, straining against the fabric keeping him tied to the chair.

At that moment seonghwa finally came. You could hear his groan through his chest and feel the cum spilling into you. Nice and full.

With a few more thrust seonghwa finally stopped. Allowing you to rest a moment before pulling you off him. You collapsed into your blankets. Feeling moments away from sleep, but you kept your eyes open. Seonghwa took a moment before standing pulling up his own boxers before moving over to where Yunho sat panting. He looked down at the boy and laughed.

"You came untouched?"

"Yes sir"

[gayspock]

OK assorted black sails thoughts bc i didnt wanna make a billion individual posts

- first of all i find starz funny bc for real i swear ive never freaking heard of it before, except for torchwood: miracle day which.... literally i never finished but thats a whole ramble for another time (bc despite torchwood being VERY bumpy, i found a lot of value in it, but miracle day was just. give us nothing! to me...help)

- the women on the show are kind of a shame i mean. im not fuming its more of a (dejected sighhhh) lies back do you know what i mean bc its hardly worse than anything else but help... theyre all gorgeous models thus far do you know what i mean. i dont know. i think its just odd sometimes to look at it when the men are all fucking foul looking, mucky type of guys (<3!) and then the girlies are just like hiii<3 like okay LOL. max is rlly pretty tho (as is the lass in the hat- whose name i didnt atch..) so i shant be mad but its also likehelp... even just an OLDER? woman. not even one? sniffy sniffy? okayyy i'll settle

- the gentleman do have some wonderful haircuts i will say. rackham's stoner transmasc that hangs about in unique trousers round the back of spoons.... i mentioned it already but help. your rat tail... and flints pathetic and limp little ponytail. shrimptastic it is.... and johnny silver. (twirls his hair for him)

- INTRO ALSO FUCKS LIKE MAD BTW.

- i love a woman with daddy issues. i cant relate to any of them. not to eleanor, or to shiv or helena or any of the fine women with father problems despite having many of my own. but its very fun to watch them. like girlies (twirls my hair) just give him a slap.... who cares<3

- btw im screaming... john is sooo funny. what a silly little guy. i think hes going to get himself killed he is like a looney tunes character who should have been dead 5 scenes ago but he keeps defying all sense and falling pianos. the very definition of a rapscallion. he is a problem to us all

- whent hey just state their names and theit ships at each other. okay so cute girlies i bet you'd write that in your tinder bios huh<3?

- also i know i keep mocking and also fawning over flints stupid little ponytail but i think he for real deserves long gorgeous beautiful hair. like it would only make sense.

- theres so many guys in here from other things but only a little bit. i know i mentioned billy bones (SO FUNNY STILL) who keeeepsss following me but everyone else is sorta recogniseable. charles was in the 100 ik this. but like hi eeryone hii LOL

- "however what?" "however let me tell you a story. about a spaniard named vazquez." I THINK FLINT LITERALLY SAYS THIS HENEVER ANYHTING AWKWARD HAPPENS TO HIM. I THINK HE LITERALLY DROPS AND SMASHES A PLATE IN IKEA AND THEY COME OVER TO HIM AND HE JUST SAYS LET ME TELL YOU A STORY. I THINK THEY CATCH HIM NICKING 5P BAGS FROM TESCO AND HES LIKE HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT A GENTLEMAN VAZQUEZ. I THINK, PERHAPS, FLINT WOUL HIT SOMEONE WITH A CAR UNDER THE INFLUENCE. AND SIMPLY SAY THE URCA DE LIMA.............. IT WILL PAY FOR YOUR INSURANCE. GOD.

- also i dont know treausre island that well . do you guys think itd be worth a read at some point. not even wrt the show here just idk ik these guys are those guys <3

- i will say also tho btw. u know that reminds me of. i love it when ppl get rlly mad abt, like, funny re-imaginings of old stories, myth and folklore like this. SORRY. JUST SAYING. i remember of all the issues there were bbc merlin, ppl fucking fuming bc it disgraces arthurian legend. girlie i dont think colin morgan made patheitc little fuck me eyes for 5 seasons for authenticity.

- speaking of. sir percival billy bones is so funny. its like theyre keeping him around just to take the piss of their big strapping guy arent they.

- i also love gates. one like to slap his bald head

- ANNE? IS THAT HER NAME? I WANT HER CREEPY CRAWLY PUSSY SO BADLY. i realise thats her name. i think. shes also like... insanely fucking hot. im like obsessed with her a bit. its the hat. and the voice. i would not give a shit otherwise- i do admit.

- ALSO: THE SEX WORKERS AT THIS PORT ARE LITERALLY THE ONLY PEOPLE WITH ANY FUCKING COMPETENCE.

- I KNOW I KEEP GOINGON ABTO HIS HAIR BUT T. THE VERY DEFINITION OF T BOY SWAG I TBHINK IM ABOUT TO PUKE

- NO WAY NO WAYYYY HE STINKS OF WEED SO BAD

- RIGHT UH- this is one of the issues of just putting uncollected thoughts into a post like this, ehrm. im approaching the scene i was warned about

- i had a feeling.... with vane. i was worried he was going to force himself on eleanor after the warnings- because certainly, his character is portrayed in a particular way thus far, to the point where it was like... well had i not been warned, i wouldnt think it, but yeah. ehrm. i guessed.. him - or at least, he would have sth to do with it, as he has here- but god. i forgot about max and i was just thinking: they wouldnt let her go, surely that makes no sense with how early we are into the show, unless its one of THOSE shows where characters are brought in and out like theres a fucking rotating door, with no rhyme or reason- but no ehrm.. yeah. :(

- and now jesus. eleanor girlie i know he ha slong hair but jesus dont just mount him cmon... cmon!!

- sighhh... ok!! end of ep 3. really sombre way to end but <3 there we go... I'LL drop this now. idk if i'll watch more tonight orrrr wht! :3 love and light

[yakocchi]

2021 Anniversary Event Ministories // Count

this post contains 2 ministories: the 4th Anniversary Collection Event (Loved So Much, I Go Breathless) and the 2021 Election Collection Event (Deep Night)

o hey it’s me why did i sandwich two honestly-unrelated stories? bc i can!! actually it’s bc i feel lame when i post too much. which goes against how you’re supposed to use tumblr…. but no one ever said i was good at this

anyway, they serve similar purposes. The Election Event is supposed to be a sort of Anniversary Event, while the..… Anniversary Event is named that. the Count did not!! have a scenario Anniversary Event this year (that was apparently reserved for the top 6. sad but makes sense) so yea, make do w/ this

The Election Story is an AU where the characters are hosts of a host club. which…. not my thing but w/e, maybe some of u like that stuff The Anniversary Event on the other hand is supposed to be in-line with canon. results in corny SHIET but i like corny shiet. like the vlad one has them buying mugs (? thats a thing in the 19th century, corny mug shit? #1 best vampire mug? bruh)

in event chronology, the anni event was way before the election one but i put the election one first here cuz it’s longer (bc i included the prologue)

Spoilers under the cut!! Please credit if you take any of it, thenk u (･ω･*)

Deep Night // Prologue + Count

⋆ didnt screenie anything for the prologue cuz LAZY. just imagine the dumb black shirts they made some poor intern edit on photoshop, thats p much it

…

One city night, the year 20XX—

[Kara]: “Survived another week of hard work, me… haah,” (I finally have the day off tomorrow. It’ll be okay if I let loose a bit tonight, right?) When I was worn out from the monotony of everyday life, I would head over to a certain place for comfort and thrills. And that establishment was—

[Napoleon]: “Welcome to Club Deep Night.”

[Arthur]: “Ah, it’s Kara. You came to see me, right? ‘Been waiting.” [Isaac]: “Hold up, Arthur; she doesn’t come here just to see you, no?” [Dazai]: “Ooh, Isaac; a Host’s jealousy isn’t pretty, you know?” [Dazai]: “Well then, Toshiko-san; Your pick tonight— Wha – is me? No, no, it’s an honor. This will be a night of blinding sensuality very soon—"

[Isaac]: “She hasn’t picked anyone and you’re already going full steam ahead. —And her name isn’t Toshiko.” [Arthur]: “Right, right; Don’t hang with some guy who can’t your name right, Kara— My princess.”

As soon as I entered the club, a smile appeared on my face as a battle of charms began in front of me.

[Napoleon]: “Sheesh… every last one of these rascals are thrilled. Sorry that they’re being so noisy.” [Kara]: “No, no! Whenever I come here, it’s fun and even perks me up.” [Vincent]: “Really? If I’m to be the source of your high spirits, then I’ll make it even livelier in here.” [Vincent]: “I’ll build the champagne tower, and prepare the call!” [Theodorus]: “Hey, Hondje— Hurry and pour the champagne. It’ll be to give gratitude to the angel that’s landed on this city tonight.” [Theodorus]: “If you can be a good girl, I’ll tease and spoil you to bits.”

⋆ in host clubs, there’s a thing called a champagne call. the customer buys some very expensive bubbly, and all of the hosts gather round her table to chant, sing, w/e i was curious on how the localization handled theo’s dog nickname for MC (like 駄犬) cuz if they did a straight translation (mongrel, mutt, etc.), i feel like the western audience would hate him lul. glad they found smth

Everyone tries to entertain me, and in a single moment, their sweet words make me forget about my ordinary life. (It’s nice that everyone is so lively; but shouldn’t I go pick someone for tonight…?)

Troubled about it, arms then suddenly wrapped around my waist on both sides, causing me to cry out. [Faust]: “How long do you intend to go down one by one like that, keeping us men waiting?” [Faust]: “Come on— Please pick someone, and quickly. I can’t say... that I don’t know who you should be choosing.” [Charles]: “Ugh, there goes the cunning Doctor. I wanted to be picked by her, and now you’re doing all this.” [Charles]: “Hey— Pick me, Kara. I’ll do things to you that’ll make you feel good, utterly euphoric...” [Sebastian]: “Stop the Sexy Time. Even though you are a host, please show some restraint within club walls, Charles.” [Sebastian]: “...There being so many rivals vying for Kara’s nomination, is a nuisance.”

[Jeanne]: “If I do things that will make her feel good, will she be thrilled?” [Mozart]: “Jeanne, it’d be a good idea to not emulate what you just saw.”

⋆ “Stop the Sexy Time” is transliterated into kana, so it felt wrong to potentially change it. yes the cringe was not made by me this time. surprisingly also, this is something that gets a bit lost in translation: Charles and Jeanne both use yorokobu, in which the most common meaning is to be pleased, feel joy, etc. however, they use diff kanji which have diff connotations. Charles uses one that’s more abt physical joy (like a massage... or uh u know), while Jeanne uses one that’s more abt emotional joy (like seeing a friend u haven’t met with in a while). it’s supposed to show how dirty minded charles is while jeanne is precious LOL

[Mozart]: “Kara, come over here. You deserve to receive much finer hospitality... So, from me.” [Jeanne]: “If you pick me as well, then I’ll do my very best. Kara, won’t you come with me?” (Urgh- it’s getting more and more impossible to pick just one of them...!)

…

A bit farther away from everyone else, in the backroom— two men were exchanging words with each other: [Shakespeare]: “The moment Kara arrived, everyone became so animated.” [Shakespeare]: “She’s a mysterious one, to be able to draw us masterful hosts towards herself.” [Leonardo]: “Mhm, every single grown man is desperate to get the sweetheart’s attention.   [Leonardo]: “Well... maybe I should turn desperate too, hm?”

And in the owner’s quarters, there were also men watching Kara through the club monitors. [Vlad]: “That girl…” [Count]: “You mean Kara? She started frequenting this place a little while ago.” [Count]: “For some reason, I’m always interested… in who she picks each time.” [Vlad]: “Looks like you care quite a lot about one specific customer, dear Owner.” [Vlad]: “Kara… hm?”

…

[Napoleon]: “Regardless, all of the hosts here like you way too much. —To be honest, it makes me anxious.” [Kara]: “Huh-?” (Anxious… as a host? Or… as a man?) His words, honeyed with sweet temptation, made my heart race. His smile then deepened: [Napoleon]: “—Well, Kara; Who’s your pick tonight?”

(End of Prologue)

…

(Count)

[Count]: “So you’ve come, Kara. I’ve been waiting, you know.” I had paid a visit to the host club I always go to, and was invited to the owner’s quarters for some reason.

⋆ how is he still a Count in this AU lul. like yea nobility still exists, but it’s… strange, esp. if someone of nobility is openly running a host club

(Being called up here by the owner… this is the first time that’s ever happened.) I couldn’t come up with a reason why I was the only customer summoned here.

[Count]: “It’s not anything to be nervous about; I just wanted to hear something from you tonight.” [Count]: “You come here often, but you pick someone different every time.” [Count]: “Is there no one here that meets your expectations?” [Kara]: “My expectations?” [Count]: “Mhm. Being unable to satisfy our customers’ needs is an alarming matter.” [Count]: “If none of my kids happen to be your type, I’d like to hear what kind of things you seek.” [Kara]: “N-No… it’s not that none of them are my type;” [Kara]: “It’s just that everyone here is so wonderful, so I can’t pick only one of them.” [Kara]: “They’re cool, kind, great at conversation, and entertain me…” As I thought about the hosts who had surrounded me at the tables up to this point, I voiced my feelings honestly. I then recalled the words the Count had said just a moment ago, and felt a slight discomfort in my heart.

(I’m being honest when I say that I can’t choose between such amazing hosts. But…) (I also think it’s certainly true that “what I seek” is a bit different from them.) (The one I desire is more…) I shifted my eyes to the Count standing before me, and he responded with the composed smile of a mature adult. I was captivated by him at first glance, as a scent of danger seemed to drift from deep within that smiling face.

(But— As the owner himself, the Count’s not going to service a customer, of course…) Regretful, I dropped my gaze— Before I realized the Count had walked over to me. Cradling my chin in his fingers, he turned my head up so I face him.

[Count]: “Contrary to your words… your eyes say that there is something you desire.” [Count]: “Your indecisiveness stems from wanting more stimulation, is it not?” [Count]: “Like this, for example—"

He suddenly pressed his lips to mine. Shocked, I tried to pull away— but the Count gripped my waist in place. He then drew me in closer as if to prevent escape, changing angles countlessly as he took my lips. [Kara]: “Nn-… Don’t. I can’t pick you, the owner, as my host, so…” [Count]: “That unsatisfied-looking face of yours deeply bothers me.” [Count]: “I’m retired, but if you wish it so... For you, I’m willing to make a comeback tonight.” [Count]: “Well, now… go ahead; make your choice?” As if to seduce me, the gleaming gold eyes in front of me radiate this allure. With that, I felt that he could see through the lustful desires that lied within the recesses of my heart, and my body shivered with a subtle numbness. (I’ve never felt this way before.) Wondering what kind of stimulation he would give, I wanted to be toyed by those fingers, those lips… These emotions muddled within me.

(I think the person I’ve wanted all this time... was you from the beginning.)

[Kara]: “Count— Tonight, I’ll have you…” [Count]: “To be chosen by you, is an honor.” [Count]: “I promise to sate your thirst this evening.” [Count]: “—Give yourself to me.”

⋆ or “you can entrust all of yourself to me” if u want smth more awkward but more faithful to the original text

A fervent kiss rained down on me as if to fill what I had been deprived of,

and the night that would far exceed the stimulation I had desired, had just begun—

FIN

⋆ u kno, i did try making the characters sound more 21st century in this AU. but at the same time, the count probably wouldnt be the type to say yeet (aka a useless person) so idt it showed that much

…

Loved So Much, I Go Breathless // Count

…

Inside a swaying carriage, the Count sat across from me. Staring at me fixedly, he then gave a deep sigh. [Count]: “You are astoundingly beautiful tonight, Kara. —It was good to have left the manse like this.” [Count]: “If we had traversed the streets by foot, then I would have surely faced difficulty in having to shake off the men charmed by you.” [Kara]: “Ah-… D-Don’t play around like that, please.” [Count]: “I’m being completely honest, you know. —Well, if someone were to come near you, I wouldn’t let them lay a finger on you anyway.”

⋆ he says something closer to “those are my true thoughts, without a single lie” but that’s going too far in my arbitrary rules of “does this sound like smth ppl actually say” so whee

(J-Jeez; He always acts like this…) Wanting to mislead my pounding heart, I hastily changed the subject.

[Kara]: “Um… Where are we going tonight?” [Count]: “Oh my, did you forget? Today’s the anniversary of the day we met, of all things.” [Kara]: “Of course I didn’t forget. It was the day I changed my own fate, and met you— A day I cherish so very much.” [Count]: “It’s the same for me; And it’s precisely why we’re going to a place where I may reaffirm my love.” (“Love”…?) When I tilted my head, the Count gave a meaningful smile, saying nothing more.

With that—

The place the stagecoach had arrived, was a church I recognized. (This is… the place where we had confirmed our love for one another.) The Count took my hand before we entered, the moonlight silently illuminating the unoccupied altar.

[Count]: “I have decided from my heart— that on this day, and on every day we call ‘our anniversary’—" I shall proclaim my vows to you once more.”

[Count]: “Kara— This is my oath of eternal love to you.” Before the altar, the Count kneeled before taking my left hand, dropping a reverent kiss on my ring finger. [Kara]: “nh- Ah-…” A sweet numbness ran from my finger, and my heart skipped a beat.

[Count]: “The time I spend with you, is filled with a dazzling brilliance.” [Count]: “—Filled to the point where I believe those centuries I had of embracing nothingness, came to be for the purpose of being able to meet you…” [Count]: “If you would allow it— For the future to come, with you by my side, I shall continue to swear such (to you).”

[Count]: “And thus, I wish that one day, I shall become one with you. —That is the greatest happiness I seek.”

He then rose to his feet, embracing me as if to envelop me whole. With my cheek pressed against his chest, I could feel his heart beating as fast as mine. (Like this, it’s as if I’m becoming one with the Count— With Abel.)

He tenderly brushed my hair aside before running a finger down my neck. One day, fangs will sink into this very spot, and love from a pureblooded vampire – called “eternity” – will be spilled within. Thinking about such things, my heart grew full— and tears were about to fall down my face, involuntarily.

[Kara]: “Abel… me too, I-…”

Overcome with emotion, I was at loss for words— When an almost-biting kiss fell upon me, cutting off my words. His tongue caught mine through my broken lips, our hot sighs immediately laden with heat.

[Count]: “—There is no need for words.” His lips only barely parting from mine, he whispered with a glossy sigh.

[Count]: “The tears brimming in your eyes, tell me everything— that you belong to me.” [Kara]: “Ah-… Abel…” His gentle - but also denying any notion of resistance – and sweet kiss, deepened, desiring me and only me. I embraced him with all my strength, abandoning myself to this happiness that will last forever and ever…

FIN (2)

Ikevam has been kind of boring if u dun like the top 5 all that much but i mean always has been astronaut_gun.jpg

anyway, the election was mostly a skip for me this year cuz i dun care for mini figures. also, he was doing awful in categories bc ppl are voting characters over several categories (rather than just the recommended one). frankly i think it’s dumb to vote a character in anything other than the “officially” recommended category bc the chance of losing in all categories is much higher than getting stuff in >1 category (e.g., with the midterm results u can see vlad in every category, but he’s only eligible for a benefit in one…when he could easily just win in one category period). but maybe that way of thinking is too tryhard for a game that only barely fits the definition of a game #realgamurz #weliveinasociety

i honestly didn’t do (aka pay) much and ranked rly well in character rankings. so i was happy i got decent stuff, but sadder he doesn’t get much support;; u telling me the richest guy has the stingiest fans. yes. i mean look at me, microwave pizza is my life

sorry for the lack of updates. as usual but uh better to be annoying with no updates than with too much RITE haha yes………. yes

as always, thanks for reading!

[gunsatthaphan]

Bro i just talked about that topic with a friend and i find it so interesting as well cause in my male queer ships that arent from bl most of the fandom seems to be queer women.

Its very interesting to think about why bl is mostly women. A part may be that we are attracted to one or both characters but that tends to be the case with straight ships too i believe, hust now youre attracted to both.

I think it all comes to what female representation in media is like and who fenale characters are written by. I find it incredibly frustrating to keep watching tv shows that are led by the male gaze and only get frustrated when female characters are just an asset to make the male lead better or just are the romantic interest or the bad guy or sometimes in shows teenage characters with whom i could mostly never relate. I think bls are written or made by mostly women or queer people so its kind of refreshing to not only dont have to see a straight relationship and feel forced to relate to the girl/woman but also with seeing men being written in a way that is more appealing. Bl i think is kind of targetted to women and there is a side where some people may fetishize it or just be creepy about it but mostly its just a gay relationship in a tv show, its not that odd.

Also as a queer women i can tell you we are always looking for representation and bl is a big industry where you can find a lot of people who really try hard to show a good message and end the tabu around queer couples (and some who dont which we know but well). I would like that there were more gl things but i guess this shit works in a certain way, maybe in the future we will be able to improve more since in the last few years the bl industry has improved dramatically in its ways.

I really have been thinking about it and men just are so restricted in all aspects or life, that its so refreshing to see different kinds of ways men express themselves without them exploiting the idea of a woman that men create. Its refreshing to see the actors be more comfortable and create a safe space where they dont have to feel obligated to be always limiting and controlling their actions. I think its jut a good female space where women dont have to feel uncomfortable relating all the time to weird female characters and also seeing men in a different light (this last thing doesnt only happen in bl, if u see the kind of characters women love, at least in my case, are jake peralta or nick from new girl, not the male alpha sex symbol). Idk, theres a lot to say about this, i saw an article and took a few screenshots so ill try to leave them down here.

Also at the end of the day everyone watches what they watch. People shouldnt feel ashamed and i, for example, am a bisexual women so if it were that im attracted to both men and thats the only reason why i watch bl or gay ships then i should feel the same with straight couples...right?

Also watching gay or any queer couple isnt fetishizing or weird or embarrasing. Stop stigmatizing queer people and making it as if it were sooo different from watching straight people in tv shows. There are many issues in the bl industry but it also isnt a bad place. Actors are always embraced in the induatry and fans support them so much (idk too deep about some ships or fandoms, a lot is fanservice which is ok too, but for example offgun and their fandom which is amazing). Everything in the world has faults and bad spots but also...stop u guys lol

Ill drop the screenshot (which i just realized is in spanish so sorry if yall dont speak spanish but if u do here u go!!) and ill leave hahah sorry for the long ass text but i was just thinking about it.

hello there!

thank you very much for sharing your thoughts!

I don't want to make this too long; not because I don't want to answer but because you already made very good points. I don't think I need to add much 🙈

Also I don't know spanish so I can't read the screenshot but I very much agree with the last chapter of your text. The fetishization issue is still very relevant because sadly it still exists in big parts of the fandom but you're absolutely right about the stigmatizaton part!!

so thank you again!! ✌🏻

xxx